#I’m still gonna try again but I feel so horrible
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I’m so fucking.. idk. I’m feeling a lot of things, all very strongly. I’m upset, I’m angry, I’m sad, I’m frustrated, I’m disappointed, I’m stupid. That was the first interview I’d gotten in a while and I was so confident with it. I was ready. How did I get the date wrong? How did I not know it was yesterday? What the fuck is wrong with me?
That was my chance to get a job, a meaningful one that I might’ve enjoyed at that. She agreed to reschedule my interview but I still fucked up majorly. My chances of getting this job are so much lower now. I’m so fucking mad at myself, how did I fuck up this bad??
#borderline bullshit thoughts#just depression things#just anxiety things#just bpd things#when you’re such a fuck up that you mess everything up#I’m still gonna try again but I feel so horrible#i’m so disappointed#what the fuck is wrong with me
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It’s 7:30 in the morning and I’m exhausted but I don’t know if I’ll be able to fall asleep again any time soon….
It’s like I was *just* starting to heal from having my heart and trust shattered 3 years ago, and now it’s happening all again, only this time I don’t have the church to go to for comfort/prayer/encouragement. And instead of a friendship I had for 2-3 years, it’s a church I’ve been going to for TWENTY TWO YEARS
I feel like I’m living in the twilight zone, this can’t actually be happening, right?
(I’m not okay, I keep crying and I just want to wake up from this nightmare)
#I don’t even know what to tag this as I just can’t#I was literally just telling my counselor that I feel like I’ve never had the ‘years of plenty’#only the suffering and trials…and now this happens to seem to confirm that#and it doesn’t help that I was already having trouble trusting the leader after last year#and now it’s like a big ‘I told you’ from my brain which isn’t gonna help me trust anyone in the future#I was already having a hard time taking chances and trying to trust again ans NOW THIS#I know I should at least try to sleep again I just…I don’t even know anymore#I’m not even gonna tag this as any normal stuff tbh#how about just#aceo get her heart broken again#not to mention I’m terrified I’m going to fallback into the numb empty depression pit I only just kind of got out of#and faith? bro I understand how people left the church or faith cause it is HARD to differentiate between the church and God#I’m still trying to pray and stuff I just feel so empty and I can’t do this again#it doesn’t help that the church claimed that they felt ‘lead’ to this crappy situation whatever THAT means#I only heard it second hand tbh…I just…can this stop please? can this all just be a horrible dream that I wake up from? please
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Why am I like- forgetting my tags for my blog? Like the tagging system. I switched acct on tumblr app bc post limit bullshit ykyk? I’m gonna pretend that’s why /hj
#sepiasys.txt#Unrelated; stomach is complaining. I *think* it’s hunger—which makes sense. But also maybe I’m digesting stuff.#Also regarding who I is; Influence from cat perhaps? But I got off call with mom. I feel like I should be one of the less anxious ones. I#say that because I can actually make eye contact. Usually we don’t really need to look people in the eye. But if I can look at our roommate#directly; then that’s significant. Yes we have to deal with a weird mix of possible limerence (that we’re actively trying not to spiral) and#apathy and stuff. Anyways I kinda wanna get food but I know it’ll still feel kinda awkward. Also I don’t really know what to get anyway.#I mean I guess I can make a shitty sandwich? Not feelin up to it. Also don’t rlly wanna make the easy microwave breakfast burrito; and dont#wanna get one of the sweet treats. Maybe I could get a drink; nobody is really drinking the pineapple+aloe (or whatever) drink much. I kinda#like it; so I wouldn’t mind it. It’s akin to the more *sweet* pineapple side than bitter but that’s not a horrible thing. It’s not sickening#I lowkey wonder what roommate’s work schedule is gonne become; he won’t have Saturdays off anymore I think. He also doesn’t seem to have to#work today. It’s nice to know a fairly regular schedule for him so I know when I have access to Elden Ring or his comp.#Plus I’m more comfortable with myself when he’s not around. Thinking about what to eat again /lh#ANYWAYS yeah regarding who I feel like? HOW I feel like? Fairly calm. chill. ‘serious’. /shrug#I know for a fact I have to have resting bitch face rn which is hilarious to think of. But I don’t think I’m mad about anything.#Stealing from a list of names I had before; I’m gonna pretend that I fit any of em. Ren. So whatever the fuck I am right now? Ren /lh#Ren feels like a green name. Probably. *Looks at this one image of various colors of sepia we have*#*Sees ‘Join or Die’ green sepia* that’s pretty rad /pf#Anyways. I wonder if there’s multiple of us that actually act/feel similarly. What if I can act like this and it’s not me but someone else?
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roman roy cares too much. he loves too much. he gets treated like shit by his dad, and still swoops to the lowest points to please him. because he loves him. he starts relationships out of something stupid/ just to be a dick (tabitha), or out of sadness/curiosity (gerri) only to get attached. he acts like the big man, like he doesn’t care, when clearly he does. it’s clear that his breakup with tabitha still affects him. it’s clear he’s overly enamoured with gerri and her “dumping” him and getting with someone else very clearly upset him. he goes between pushing people away and dying to have them close. he pushed grace away. he pushed tabitha away. he didn’t so much as push gerri away, as gerri knew their “relationship” wasn’t exactly sustainable. but roman clings onto her. honestly, i feel like there’s gonna be a scene in season 4 where gerri might go back to roman and try to manipulate him somehow and roman pushes her away, even though he really doesn’t want to. he lashes out at the people he cares about. he loves his siblings so much, but tends to act like a dick to hide that fact. he doesn’t want to show weakness. because he knows to be weak is to be eaten alive.
#thinking about ‘what have you got in your hand?’ ‘i don’t know. love?’ and crying yet again#i’m in my loving roman roy hours#he loves so hard and he sees it as a weakness. as a bad thing#when it’s actually his best trait amongst all the horribleness that logan raised him with#yeah no i feel like gerri is absolutely gonna try to manipulate roman in s4 but roman will just think of “’how does it serve my interests’#and how she betrayed him and tell her to fuck herself but he’ll still be struggling with feelings for her and hating himself for it#also there’s weird shit with him and mekchen/mattson so who knows what’ll happen there (wink wink)
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Why are British teenage girls so unhappy? Here’s the answer (Caitlin Moran, The Times, Sep 13 2024)
"The report, by the Children’s Society, found that British 15-year-old girls are the most unhappy in Europe.
British girls aged 10-15 are “significantly less happy” with their life, appearance, family and school than the average boy — and their happiness is still declining.
Boys’ life satisfaction, meanwhile, remains broadly stable. (…)
But I still didn’t have an “aha!” moment about why this so disproportionately affects girls until… I talked to some teenage girls.
It was at a party, and I went to vape with them on the patio. Because I take my nicotine like children do.
“Duh — it’s the boys,” one said when I brought it up, as all the others agreed.
“The boys?” I asked.
My last book, What About Men?, had been all about how much boys struggle these days: their loneliness; their suicide rates. I’d spent the past year feeling very sympathetic towards boys.
“Yeah, well, who do you think they’re taking out their unhappiness on? It’s us,” another girl said.
“One boy at school used to draw a picture every day of how ugly I was,” a third girl said. “Every day for two years.”
“They’ve all got ‘Rate The Girls’ polls on their WhatsApps,” the first said. “They mark you down for weight gain, haircuts, what you say.”
“But then, if you’re hot, it’s just as bad, in a different way, because they’ll be talking about how they want to f*** you.”
The girls discussed coping techniques. Bad news: none of them worked.
“The only way you can stop them is if you become ‘one of the boys’ and hang out with them. But then,” the second girl said with a sigh, “all the other girls call you a slut. Because you’ve gone over to the boys’ side.”
“Surely it’s not all the boys?” I said. “There must be some nice boys?”
“Oh, yeah,” one girl said. “But they keep their heads down. Because… well, look.”
She showed me the Instagram account of her friend. Under every picture she posted of herself — smiling in a new dress; with her dog — dozens of anonymous accounts had replied with the most rank abuse.
“Fat.” “Slut.” “You gonna try and kill yourself again, for attention?”
“They’re all boys from her school,” she said. “And look, this one boy tried to defend her.”
I saw a series of messages from a brave teenage boy, posting things like, “You’re all big men, leaving these replies under anonymous accounts.”
As I could see, this boy immediately became a target too. Mainly accusations that he was “white knighting” this girl: “You wanna f*** her, bro?”
“So,” I asked, “you don’t think it’s social media pressure to be beautiful, or the economy, that’s making girls so sad?”
“Well, yeah, them too,” the first girl said. “But, Monday-Friday, 9-3, I’m not on social media. I’m not… in the economy. I’m just with these boys. And no one talks about how horrible they are.”
I thought about another recent report, showing a 30 per cent ideological gap between Gen Z men, who are increasingly conservative, and Gen Z women, who are increasingly progressive.
I thought about Andrew Tate, who has nine million mostly young male followers — and faces human trafficking charges, which he denies.
And I thought: maybe these girls are on to something. Maybe more people need to vape with teenage girls and ask them for the school gossip."
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maybe i’m just finding any issue with situationship guy before we have sex bc i’m feeling weird about sex but also maybe he wasn’t wrong when he said he was clingy and i do not care for it
#personal#i called him bud and we had to have an extremely long talk about it#like literally said no problem bud and we had to have a 2 convo on it bc it was too nonchalant and aloof#anyway half way through when i got through to him that im having to comfort him for two hours about calling him bud#he was like holy shit you literally just called me bud i am so fucking clingy i am my mother#like it went from 2 hour convos at 3 am or while i’m at work explaining that im not a horrible person for x#i was like hey if we’re gonna do this every night we should stop talking bc wtf do you even like about me#he stops doing that#then he gets upset i’m not emotionally open i call him on the fact he’s treating this like a relationship and im his girlfriend#when i was very upfront what i can do emotionally and it’s not that#he noticed that and said he’ll try to stop but it’ll still happen and i’ll still be like dude. we’re not that and you’re not entitled to#that#and i can’t tell if it’s the tiredness from weed/ work/ staying up later to hang with him/ talking at length#or if i’m just genuinely sick of this and want to break it off#and like he doesn’t get it which is also annoying#bc he wants to and hang and despite me saying i’m tired is still hitting me up at like 1 am u up#not a sexy text that’s when he’s out of work#and i went out late while mad tired bc he had the day off (rare) and i felt bad#and i like when i miss or ignore late night texts bc i don’t want to accidentally land in a long ass convo when i have work in the morning#and godddddd he’s just kinda emotional#like he’s fun to talk to or hang with and there’s physical chemistry but also so much of this is so much work and annoying#and the night i was like we should break this off i even said this is a lot of work for a dude who did me dirty#and also it feels weird bc it’s very unbalanced on liking bc he rlly likes me and wants to date and i definitely don’t want that#i kinda want to cut it off if we have to have a super long chat again. like i told him im fine reassuring him now and then#but if it’s a daily or hourly thing we should cut it off bc that’s too much for me OR him but mainly me#or maybe it can be chill and we can just hang out/ have sex/ maybe go on dates and then it can end in a while when it’s run its course#either way i’m gonna have to end it bc he def won’t#to be clear i’m not being super mean i invite him out to the movies and drive him i drive him to taco bell just to hang im putting work in#but i just wish people were more comfortable with themselves and liked themselves#call me avoidant but i wish people were more comfortable with themseleves and being alone sooooooooooooo fucking bad
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Who? ˳༄꠶
jealous!Rafe Cameron x fem!Reader ༄꠶ summary: “No way am I sending my girl on a study date with another man." warnings: very very mild sexual concepts, jealous Rafe
based on this request!
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Rafe Cameron was looking right at you with a death glare, the kind of look you’d pin on horrible people who were only doing horrible things. You’d think your boyfriend would understand that being in college requires unavoidable group work, which leads to unavoidable conversations with people you would much rather not know at all. Naturally, you were wrong. Devastatingly wrong.
“I don’t get it.” He said plainly for the fifteenth time that night, “You don’t even need this class if I’m honest.”
You rolled your eyes, trying to focus more on packing your things rather than the hole he was staring into your back.
“Don’t do that shit.. c’mon baby..” Rafe said, getting up to stand closer to you, a persuading hand on your hip, “M’working so hard to give you a life where you don’t gotta work and-“
“Rafe, we’ve talked about this too many times.” You cut him off in hopes to finally shut him up.
“Well why don’t we talk about it again,” He said, a tiny smile on his face, “Like right now? Over dinner?”
“Baby you know that my group members will kill me if I don’t pull through.” You shrugged past him, walking to put your shoes on.
You weren’t wearing anything near special. Sweatpants and one of Rafe’s oversized hoodies were all that you were planning on showing off. But in Rafe’s eyes, HE would fuck you in that, so who’s to say that no one else would? Naturally, he carries a heavy bias considering that Rafe would fuck you in anything, but he says ‘that’s not the point.’
“So what, you’re gonna spend all night with people you don’t even like?” He asked with a scoff.
You gave him an annoyed nod, trying to prove your point.
“That’s gotta be like.. bad for your uh.. mental health. You should stay in.”
“Rafe stop-“ You started before getting a ping on your phone. You groaned to finish the sentence, storming off to get your shoes on.
“What?” Rafe called after you, quietly shuffling behind before picking your phone up and looking at the recent notifications.
Connor: When r u getting here?
“Who’s this?” Rafe asked, pointing to the phone with a look of pure hatred in his eyes.
“One of my group members, love.” You said, trying to stifle a giggle over how protective he was over you.
“Another man? Absolutely not,” He said, turning away from you to block the door out of your shared apartment before continuing his rant, “No way am I sending my girl on a study date with another man. Who do you think-“
You pushed past him, backpack already slung over your shoulders as you made your escape to the front door.
“Nope.” He said plainly, grabbing the back of your bag and making you look at him, his fingers tracing your jaw and holding your eyes to his.
“Rafe..” You whined, but his touch was strict.
“You’re mine, baby. Not Connor’s, a’ight?” He said, brushing hair from your face.
“I’m yours.” You repeated, standing on your tip-toes to give him a kiss on the cheek.
His eyes softened and he thought he got you wrapped around his finger, pulling away to look at your flushed face. Instead, you darted to the door when his touch weakened, hand on the knob before Rafe could get another word in.
“Love you!” You said, closing it before everything caught up to him.
The group work went fine and almost exactly like you thought. A long session and a gut wrenching feeling of exhaustion afterwards. It’s never your favorite event but there were worse things that could happen. Things like walking back into your apartment after narrowly escaping your boyfriend’s possessive hand.
You opened the door quietly, which was already unnecessary. Of course he was still wide awake, waiting for you like a father punishing his daughter for sneaking out. He was sitting on the couch, arms crossed and scowling at you.
“What the fuck?” He asked, getting up to meet you at the front door.
You shoved your shoes off, setting down your backpack and walking closer to Rafe. “M’tired baby..” You said, making every attempt to walk past the intimidating block he made in the hallway.
“No, no no.. this isn’t how it’s gonna work,” Rafe said, using both of his hands to hold your shoulders and forcing you to stand right in front of him as he lowered his voice, “Can’t just do that baby.. a’ight?”
“Sorry..” You whispered, breaking free of his hold on your shoulders and instead pulling yourself into him, wrapping your arms around him in a hug.
You could feel the slightly annoyed laugh that bubbled from him, but you could also feel the chaste kiss that he left on the top of your head. Rafe’s soft spot for you would always shine through his anger. You let yourself melt into his arms while you contemplated falling asleep standing.
“C’mon..” He whispered into you, equally as tired from staying up and waiting for you to come back to him.
You felt him pick you up cautiously, kissing your cheek as you let your eyes start to close.
——————————————————————
The next morning was a beautiful Saturday, which of course was the day you woke up to about 15 messages from your project’s group chat. Somehow you managed to squirm away from Rafe’s death grip over your body to check your phone. Casual conversations relating to different parts of the project and other things that you wanted nothing to do with flashed across the screen.
Over your shoulder you heard Rafe groan and felt him reach for where you weren’t. He looked around for you, watching groggily as you typed out a response on your phone.
“Baby..” He trailed off, rubbing his eyes.
“Sorry.. group project.” You whispered, giving in and letting yourself melt back into his arms.
“At 9 in the morning?” Rafe mumbled into you, an annoyed sigh died in his throat when you ran your fingers through his hair.
Sleep clouded your mind as the two of you held each other close again. He wasn’t trying to show it, but his possessiveness and jealousy were leaking out of him like a faucet.
“G’morning princess..” You heard Rafe whisper from above you, brushing the lazy hair from your cheeks.
You groaned and shifted, trying to find the warmth in the bed now that Rafe had gotten up.
“Let’s get lunch, hm?” He asked, gently moving you to face him again.
You nodded, trying to nod away the urge to dive back under the blankets.
Getting ready wasn’t as hard as you thought it would be, just because Rafe had already bought you the perfect outfit and you didn’t have to fight off your hair as much as you normally did. Whenever you got ready, Rafe would always finish before you and sit on the edge of the bed, admiring your reflection in the bathroom mirror. Your cheeks would flush up and you could never get your blush right anymore because he somehow always had your face a pink shade of red.
Rafe grabbed your bag for you, a small purse that fit your pretty dress. He also went to get your phone from its shameful place at the bedside table because of course you had forgotten to charge it last night.
One text had lit up your screen and his eyes narrowed the moment he saw it was from Connor.
“Baby, why is Connor texting you?” He asked, walking to your spot in the bathroom and shoving the phone in your face to quickly get your attention.
You took the phone, opening the notification while Rafe watched from over your shoulder.
Connor: Hey, I have some ideas for the paper. You want to meet up to talk? I was thinking a Cafe or something.
You could feel the angry red heat of jealousy seeping out of Rafe’s body.
“I told you.” He said, taking the phone from you and staring at the message again, almost dumbfounded at Connor’s audacity.
“M’not going.” You said plainly, looking at him with a lightly apologetic look.
“Damn right you’re not.” He replied, throwing your phone onto the bed and looking at you with an angry glare staring down at your face.
You watched an idea form in his head. It was easily not anything good considering the way his lips turned up in a thin smile and his gaze moved between you and the phone in a heartbeat.
“Y’know.. I really don’t want my girl missn’ anything..” He trailed off, walking to where he threw your phone originally.
“Rafe..” You tried to protest, not fully understanding where his head was at.
“No.. I think I gotta be a good boyfriend here.” He nodded to himself before looking at you with an unforgettable smirk.
“Baby I don’t want to go.” You said, walking up to him and trying to read his cocky expression.
“You, go?” He asked with faux confusion, cocking his head to the side, “No no, you’ve got it all wrong.”
Rafe stood up, taking your hands in his and kissing your knuckles before looking back down at you. Now it was your turn to be confused, furrowing your eyebrows.
“You think I’m stupid, baby?” He mocks, kissing your up jaw and stopping by your ear, “M’gonna go in for you.”
Whatever hint of a smile you had on your face slowly disappeared as realization dawned on you.
“I think I’ll text him right now and let him know I’m on my way. Give him a nice surprise when he realizes it’s not the pretty little girl that he wants.” Rafe said slyly, pulling back with a malicious smile.
“Then he and I can really talk, hm?”
The next day, Connor dropped the class.
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#mariespen#outer banks#rafe cameron#obx fic#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x reader#rafe obx#rafe x reader#rafe x you#rafe imagine#rafe outer banks#rafe fanfiction#rafe drabble#rafe cameron blurb#jealous!rafe cameron#jealous rafe#obx x reader#outer banks imagine#obx fanfiction#obx
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“Fuck you Comic Con nerds!” | DC - Batman WIP
Batfam X Isekaied Reader
— in which you, a DC fan gets isekaied into and gets saved by boy wonder. Only to get mad at him and B… it’s only after you calm down (still mad at them) you piece together what actually happened… but should you tell them?
AU: Soulmate (?), isekai Rating: Sfw
Note: You and Damien are the same age and shit. I don’t really remember how old he is but for the sake of fanfiction let’s age him up to 18 (or down I looked it up and it said he was 37? I have no idea where that info was from comic are confusing)
Warning: Y/N swears a lot and makes a like one sexual joke? _________________________________
One minute you were in the greatest, most magical place in the world: Six flags. And the next you were in the sewer. To say you were pissed and totally confused was an understatement. Those funnel cakes by the entrance were calling your name- you were gonna get one before you left! Now instead of that sweet cake smell it was replaced with the smell of shit and piss and whatever else lived in the sewer.
Sixflags was suppose to be relaxing- doctors orders. You just needed to relax and distract from-
You were in the sewers. You dreaded to think about what you may have stepped in while on your quest to find a manhole cover.
So yes, you looked like an idiot in a Superman cape carrying a Wayne enterprises mug wondering around the sewers. The mug was half off and made you feel like you existed in the world of DC instead of the regular merchandise… and the cape was because who doesn’t get a cape when they go to six flags? Or at least bring the cape they already bought with them. Looking back, you blamed the mug. Anyway, you were wandering around this horrible sewer with water greener then green. It seriously looked toxic… when you heard this horrible roar…
You glanced back from where you came- looking towards the sound, when you heard it again. So, like any sane person. You broke out into a sprint.
Bad ideas, because it heard you and was coming closer now.
You seriously doubted you would be able to outrun this thing for long. It was getting closer and rapidly. But, thankfully, luck was on your side- because you saw a manhole cover!
Climbing the ladder you pushed the thing open-
Only to almost get ran over by a fucking car! “Watch it!” You cursed at the speeding car, a certain finger proudly in the air as you climb out. Momentarily forgetting about the creature that was chasing you. Remember that you slammed the man hole cover shut in a hurry.
But, did you think you could compete with some monster when it comes to the battle of strength? Yeah, didn’t think so either. It blasted the manhole cover off of its neat little spot and you hurry back and away from the road. “What the- oh my god.” You breath in relief when the thing was too big to actually climb out of the sewers. “Killer croc… okay… I’m losing it… whatever it is…” you try and breath out to collect yourself but you were interrupted by the sound of a very angry lizard man… thing. Crocodile? “Okay fuck off!” You shouted angrily at the villain and rip your cap off. “Abusive aunts or some shit is hard but by god your annoying!” You huff and run away because that just made him more angry and you didn’t want to stick around for that.
You did run away while waving two fingers at him, each from the middle of two of your hands but that was neither here nor there. You just needed to walk away and clear your head-
And…
You bumped into someone on your little escape. A chest of a fucking cosplayer. “My day couldn’t be going worse- oh my god, Fuck you Comic Con nerds!” You swore at the boy in black, red and green. “Six flags was suppose to be fucking relaxing!” You swore at him and turned away to go the opposite way only to bare witness to the snarls of a certain croc
“get back here!” He made the fucking ground shake.
“Fuck you and your shitty Damien cosplay, I am out of here.” You turn and ran from him only he to met with the silhouette of a bat… man, it was fucking Batman. “Oh I wonder who it is? Bruce Wayne, no fucking duh, Go fight the idiot on acid and leave me out of it.” You hissed because you were cornered. You tend to lash out when your cornered. He approached you quieter now. “…Oh um, I’ll take the crocodile, thanks.” You spoke as you backed up only for him to make the ground shake harder-
“Fine! Boy wonder then god damn. At least he’s hot!”
“How do You know our names?” Boy wonder piped up. He was suddenly standing beside you.
“Are You dense or really into role play?” You hissed at them. “I don’t know what kind of budget your little prank crew is working with but screw off!” Just then the crocadile managed to ruin the ground around him and break free- resulting in Batman and Robin to fight him and you-
The sane one to run away, “I’m so suing six flags for this- didn’t sign up for their fucking role-play shit.”
—————————————
Okay, so after adjusting. You were no longer in six flags- nor some rich nerds cosplay special effects whatever. Hell you didn’t even somehow end up on a movie set shooting for the next Batman. “Gotham more like god dammit, right?” You joked to yourself, and the old women next to you. She just looked at you weirded out and oddly disappointed before shaking her head. “Okay, Fuck me then.”
So, yeah, you were feeling a lot of emotions. Hey, you can adjust to this! Because no way in hell was getting back to your world worth being involved in whatever episode or comic plot this whole thing was. Yeah no, fuck that. You made a checklist.
1. Get out of Gotham (metropolis was lovely, Superman was cool-)
2. Get enough money to fuck off to some corner of the world no one knew about.
And finally 3. Live peacefully knowing you’ll never get that funnel cake.
The only problem? You didn’t have any money, food, shelter, phone, money again, or anything besides the clothes on your back. And you were craving funnel cake. Yes, you were poor in Gotham. That was basically a death sentence.
At least you had a mug. A stupid, useless mug. Hey, at least you can beg for change with it! “I should rob people.” You mutter to yourself because, that seemed like a good easy way to get money- the old women next to you however eyed you warily and moved her purse. “Not you, we’re cool Margaret.” You sent her a wave and a wink and got up. This plan would work.
It was this or sell the Justice leagues names to villains. Which- hey that could make cash and make you dead!
—————————————
Despite what people will tell you, stealing is fun.
Who would have guessed- your a natural pick pocket! If pick pocketing was running past women and tugging their bags away. “My bag! My purse!” Okay, maybe you had a bit of a sick sense of humor but you were desperate! And you made 132 dollars and 25 cents. Had it been two days? Yes, had you been pepper sprayed twice? Yes again, but you avoided it!
The only regret you had? Why hadn’t it been marvel? Marvel just seemed easier to live in. Yes the world did end but it bounced back! You sighed and threw a penny in the air. You were honestly tired. Two days was a long time to go without a bed. You couldn’t get a job either, you tired and needed so much to prove you were a serial killer or a thief- which included a birth certificate you didn’t have and so much more. Background checks would be the death of you. Even at that small cafe you met Margret? Yeah it was Margret. “Well we’ll well, if it isn’t Gotham’s newest petty criminal.”
You dropped your penny. Leaving you with 24 cents.
It was Jason fucking Todd.
“If I die, at least make it by those thighs.” You said solemnly, accepting your death. “I mean seriously, you squat or something?” You did a wolf whistle and now you were being detained. Okay, you tried.
You never claimed to be better then a man. And if you did you lied.
“I got her B.”
.
.
.
.
“Banananannaan Batman! Da Na!” You sang as Batman’s Batmobile pulled into the bat cave. The same one you had been dragged too. “He’s the crime fighting vigilantes who works alone! Besides Robin, Nightwing, Gordon, the Justice League, batgirl, Red Robin, red hood, Oracle, Barbra, um… I know theirs more help me out jay bird?” You sang as he excited the car. “He refuses to kill the joker who’s a mass murder ands death would save thousands! It’s Batman! The hero man! Danananana!”
“How do You know?” Batman asked as he walked towards you.
“The Song? Oh I improvised. Hard to find rhymes for Batman, hero man is pretty good though, huh?” He fucking punched you! “Fuck! What the hell dude? Wait are you the angry Batman who’s quieter or the nice Batman- god it’s so hard to know which one I ended up with.”
“This is serious.” Dick Said as he grabbed Batman hand and pulled him away from you.
“Heard of coping? penis?” You rolled your eyes, “this is kinda how I do it.”
“You sold our information, or Superman’s information too a villain. Tell us why and how you knew it and we’ll let you go.” He continued, “our friend is in serious danger now because of you.” He gritted his teeth looking upset.
You just rolled your eyes and licked your now bloody teeth. “Would have sold your guys information for a lot more then I got on me. Living large with eight dogs- maybe cats? Don’t know how I feel about animals actually. Which do you prefer dogs or cats?”
“We need to know how many villains you sold us out too.” Dick said calmly, his face getting closer to your own. “Now.”
You smile and lean closer to him. “You free after this?” He backed away with a frustrated look and Batman put his hand on Dick shoulder. “Oh B is tapping in now- great!”
“Your the only person who knows who we are.” Another voice said you looked behind you and saw Damien.
“That you don’t trust. Maybe check your inner circles before punching a poor thief! God… you’d think the world greatest detective would fact check- oh wait isn’t the greatest a chimp or something? I’ve always loved monkeys- oh maybe I’d get a monkey for my pent house.”
“You have no family, no friends, no birth certificate- before last week you didn’t exist. There are no records of you being born or traveling to Gotham. Who exactly are you?” Batman leaned close to you.
You stayed silent, thinking of your options. "I was with a traveling circus..." You began, "Then one day someone rigged the equipment for my parent's routine and then batman adopted me, and that was how I began robin..." You spoke solemnly, you noticed how a certain blue suited bird man tensed up. "Aw, don't tell me we have the same backstory!" You accused the Nighwing, "well one of us is going to have to change it and I hate to tell you, but I make it work."
"She knows more about us than our names... or at least more about Nighwing." You heard a robin mutter, the red one.
"Okay being red was his thing” you look at red hood, “and you took it, so you have no place to talk about me and penis's copycat situation- Even though I totally did it first and he should change it." You nudged your head towards Red Hood, "Kinda like how you took his role as Robin, but you know what Ima stay away from that can of worms haha." You laughed awkwardly as Jason stood up from behind you and walked towards you menacingly.
"This is a Major Turn Off for me you know? The costumes just don’t do it- maybe if you strip-“ and your mouth was tapped shut.
_____________________________________NOTE: Y/N is supposed to be Deadpool coded because I was watching Deadpool and laughing my ass off earlier.
#Batman X Reader#batfam#batfamily#batfam x reader#dc x reader#tim drake x reader#dc imagine#dick grayson x reader#batfam x you#batfam fanfiction#reader insert#WIP#idk what else to tag#batman#dc comics#dc comics x reader#batfam x isekai Reader#isekai Reader#Justice league x Reader#robins x Reader#robin x reader#nightwing x reader#red hood x reader#red robin x reader#Batman isekai#batman isakaied
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You're ok
Summary: As you recover from a life threatening mission, Natasha struggles to be vulnerable.
Natasha Romanoff x F!R
Edit: The last part is a scene from The Diplomat's season 2. Highly recommend the show, as it also has our lovely Ali Ahn ( AKA Alice Wu)
Death is part of the job. You had always been prepared for it.
Failure and a slow recovery were things that you were less inclined to accept.
It was hard to deal with the fact you had been ambushed, and almost killed by a bomb in what was supposed to be an easy mission.
Two weeks after being confined to the sterile hospital walls you’re back at the Compound. Bucky offered to help, carrying your things and lending his arm as support.
You certainly didn’t expect the rest of the Avengers on the foyer, excited to greet you.
“Don’t make a fuss” you say, letting them hug you. Wanda rolls her eyes, taking your bag.
“It’s a miracle you’re alive. We’re gonna make a fuss”
“Just for today, let us make a big deal out of this” Steve says.
You had seen all of your teammates when they visited at the hospital, with one notable exception.
Said exception walks through the door, the hint of a smile on her beautiful face as your eyes meet green ones.
“Welcome back” Natasha says, her tone gentle.
“Thank you”
“Romanoff might like you, she almost smiled” Tony says, but you don’t pay him attention.
“That’s just because I thought you weren’t here” Natasha walks past him, squeezing your good arm as a silent goodbye. How you wish you could follow after her, ask why she didn’t even stop by once, but she’s hurrying out the room in record time, as if she can sense your intentions.
Truthfully, you won’t act on them. Natasha doesn’t owe you anything, not even a get well card.
“Let’s get you settled in your new room” Tony becons, and you frown.
“New room? What happened to the old one?”
“This one has some improvements. You’re gonna love it”
It’s evident he still feels guilty over what happened, though it was definitely not his fault that you almost got killed.
The new room has a mini fridge, a giant tv, a king size bed, and a small couch. It also has a huge bathtub, as well as an incredible view of the forest behind the Compound.
“Do you like it?”
“It’s… I’m perfectly fine going back to my old room”
“Can I have it if she doesn’t want it?” Sam intervenes, looking around the space.
“Come on, you’re gonna be using crutches for a while. You need a bigger space. And entertainment”
“It’s true” Steve says. “Of course we all want to be optimistic but…”
The doctors had said it would take at least six weeks to get you walking without aid. And then, you’d have to train and get back in shape. You are looking at two or three months of recovery.
It’s not that you dislike the bigger space or amenities. It’s the fact that Natasha was closer to you in the other room, and so you’d meet her most mornings as you’d step out to hit the gym or make breakfast.
Now, not only is she emotionally distant, she’s also physically away. And you don’t know which is worse.
“I’ll give it a try” you promise, though you know nothing will be better than your old room.
—
There are unexpected challenges that come with your injuries. Like cooking breakfast. Wanda is more than happy to help most days, but she’s been out for a mission the past week. You could have stuck to cereal, except Steve is always around by the time you wake up, and he insists on making your breakfast.
It’s a nice gesture, though the food is horrible.
You’ve spent the better part of your morning playing with your eggs, considering eating cereal again, when someone places a cup of coffee and a paper bag next to you.
“I don’t know who told Steve he could cook” Natasha says with a smile.
“He means well” you answer, and wait for her to nod towards the bag to inspect its contents. Grilled cheese and a scone. Your mouth waters at the smell.
“You’re amazing, Natasha, honestly” you say between bites, moaning at the taste. “I can’t remember the last time I ate something this good. Except Wanda’s food, of course”
“Enjoy” she says, taking away the plate with eggs for you.
You were hoping to have her company while you eat, but maybe that’s too much to hope for.
—
At last, there’s something you can do. While everyone is busy with missions, you focus on reports and intelligence, which is perfect, because all you have to do is sit and read.
There are still deadlines and though no one wants to put pressure on you, you make sure nothing is delayed. As you keep reading in one of the conference rooms, the door is pushed open and you look up, alarmed at the sudden intrusion.
“Yes?” you say, pushing your glasses up, staring at Natasha. She turns around, struggling to speak.
“Y-you should be resting”
“I’m doing Bucky’s reports. You know how he is, he can’t type anything in the computer”
“It’s close to midnight. Have you even had dinner yet? I’m sure he won’t mind if you do them later”
“Nat. It’s fine, honestly” you say, smiling at her awkwardness. “I like to feel useful”
She nods, looking around the room, as if weighting her options. Moving away from the door, she walks and sits next to you, checking out some of the paperwork you’re reviewing
“Someone should have really taught James how to type” she mutters when she gets to the part where Bucky wrote target pulled out a cock instead of Glock.
You snort out a laugh, because it’s the dumbest fucking thing in the world.
“Ten bucks if you leave it like that” she insists and you shake your head.
“I considered it but then Tony wouldn’t know when to stop the teasing”
“Fair” she tilts her head, still smiling at you.
It’s obvious now that Natasha’s staying to make sure you go back to rest soon. So you enjoy the silence that comes with her presence, thinking this might be a step in the right direction.
But then, you stretch your arms above your head, forgetting about the stitches in your side until you feel a pull.
“Fuck” you bend over in pain, and Natasha is by your side in an instant. “It’s ok. I just stretched too hard. Forgot I still have a hole on my side”
Natasha’s hands hold on to the edge of the table, as if she’s struggling between storming out and staying.
“You should get some rest now” she manages to say, eyes not meeting your own.
“I’m fine”
Natasha gets ready to argue, but then reconsiders and just nods.
“I’ll leave you to it. Goodnight”
The redhead leaves the room in a hurry, and you wonder what could have possibly made her so upset.
For the next few days, you don’t see Natasha at all, and a part of you is certain she’s avoiding you.
As you lay in bed, watching a movie with Wanda, you keep going back to your interaction. Did you say something offensive? Was she simply too repulsed by weakness and didn’t know how to deal with it?
Is she avoiding me? Am I overthinking?
“She is and you are” Wanda says, her eyes never leaving the screen.
“But why… now wait a minute” you click your tongue, looking at your friend.
“I didn’t mean to, your thoughts are so loud. And so are Natasha’s. When you came back she was having a screaming match inside her head”
“What do you mean? What was she thinking?”
“No, that’s where I draw the line. If you want to know, ask her”
“If I ever see her again, sure” you mutter, though you know you lack the confidence to confront Natasha. Even if you had the chance, what’s there to say? "Hey, why are you making sure we only see each other when strictly necessary?"
She doesn’t like you, that’s the only explanation. Natasha is just being polite to keep appearances and the screaming inside her head was probably her thinking how much she wished you were still at the hospital.
Wanda snorts next to you, making you glare.
“Outta my head”
“Hey, I’m trying to watch the movie. You’re the one that needs to keep it quiet up there”
A few days later and you still have no idea how to approach Natasha. Mind you, she’s only been around the kitchen to get coffee once or twice, spending the rest of her time in missions or at the gym across the Compound.
The only time you’re not thinking about her is when the physical pain is distracting you. Like now, while changing your bandages. The doctors told you to get someone to help, but you already get help with food, laundry, even changing your god damn sheets. You’ll be damned if you ask for help with this.
“Fuckfuckfuck” you clearly did something wrong because the dressing is stuck around the edges. You pull again, but the pain is too much, so you plop down in bed. There’s a knock at the door, and you groan, which will hopefully make whoever’s on the other side go away.
“Y/N? What’s wrong?” Natasha says, rushing to your side.
“Can’t change my bandages” you say, not caring if your incompetence upsets her.
“Can I look?”
You nod, sitting up so she can see for herself the mess you’re in. Her hands are surprisingly soft and tender, and you’re almost dozing off while Natasha works silently.
Except when there’s a tug and you jump back.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It’ll be just one painful pull, ok?” the woman says, one of her hands going to your cheek. Your eyes meet and the way she’s looking at you almost makes the pain go away.
“Ok” you nod. Natasha takes it off in a swift movement, and all you can do is take a sharp breath as your skin stings. “Fuck me” you say through gritted teeth.
“I don’t think you’d enjoy it that much with the state you’re in” she jokes, which makes you smile.
“You know what I mean”
“Just teasing”
“You’re certainly good”
Natasha keeps working in silence, and you worry you may have crossed a line. When she’s done, she picks up the trash and goes to throw it away.
“Ask for help next time”
“I need help for everything. I wanted to at least do something on my own without being a burden”
“You’re not a burden” she says, her back to you as she washes her hands on the sink.
Something comes over you, and when Natasha walks by your side to exit the room, your hand shoots up to hold her wrist.
“Y/N?”
“I… I missed you. I know we’re colleagues and all I do is share whatever meal I’m having, or train with you from time to time. I know I can’t really do any of those things right now. I’m inconsequential, I know, to your life and to whatever you do. But I do miss you, Natasha. And I wish I didn’t care so much”
It feels like her skin is burning under your fingers, so you let go, ashamed at your little outburst. You’re expecting her to leave without another word but instead, she kneels to meet your eyes.
“You’re the opposite of inconsequential. But I don’t know how to care without being vulnerable”
“I don’t think that’s possible. Caring is vulnerability” you say softly. “But it’s also a strenght. It means you’re not alone”
Natasha smiles, a genuine smile for the first time in weeks. She’s about to say something else when FRIDAY calls for her at the conference room.
At this hour, it only means one thing. She stands up, looking apologetic.
“Be careful” is all you can say as she leaves the room.
—
A party is the last thing you’re in the mood for. Not only are you still wearing a cane (an improvement from the crutches) but Natasha has been gone for several days to complete a mission only a handful of people know about.
It makes you anxious, to think she might be in danger, though she is the most capable agent in the entire world.
“So glad you made it” Tony says when you finally show up. It took some convincing on Wanda’s part, but you agreed once you found an outfit that didn’t require you to wear heels.
The Avengers are at their own couch, talking and laughing. Bucky has apointed himself as your personal waiter, bringing snacks and drinks.
“Any word on Nat?” Stark asks, which distracts you from the conversation with Sam.
“Said she was still stuck at the debriefing” Steve shrugs his shoulders. It’s no surprise, if she can avoid these parties, Natasha will.
At least she’s home and safe. That brings you some peace of mind, and you’re able to enjoy the rest of the party.
Tony announces the fireworks are about to start, and you relunctantly stand next to the huge crowd assembled at the front yard of the Compound.
The first burts of color is followed by a couple of cheers.
But it’s different for you.
The booming sound, the lights, it all sets you on edge.
You’ve been around explosions before, and this had never happened. Frozen in place, you try to close your eyes and control your breathing as the noises increase your anxiety.
How you wish you could run back to your room right now, but it’s nearly impossible to walk between everyone.
“It’s ok” a voice says, and there’s the warmth of another body next to yours. “You’re ok”
“Nat” you sigh with relief, closing your eyes. Another firework explodes and you jump.
“Look at me” she says, her hand going up and down your back in a soothing motion. You nod, turning your body so she can wrap both arms around your waist. “Breathe with me”
You follow her lead, in and out, until your heartbeat is steady again.
“You’re ok” she says, this time more of a reminder to herself. “And I’m here”
“Thank you” you lean your forehead against hers, letting her decide if she wants to take that final step. Natasha smiles, a hand cupping your cheek as her lips meet yours in a tender kiss.
“I missed you too” she says when you break apart.
“I’m not going anywhere”
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Having an argument with Max, sounds exhausting. Especially when both of you are stubborn, but guess what? He'd willingly beg for forgiveness if you are still upset with him and avoiding him as a result of the argument
“I can’t do this anymore.” You whisper, shaking your head and taking a step back.
That is what finally makes Max stop dead in his tracks, mouth hanging open with whatever he was going to say next.
You’re tired. You woke up less than an hour ago and the first thing you and Max did was argue. And you really didn’t want to start the day this way, but neither of you backed away. Things escalated quickly and you just can’t do it anymore.
“What are you talking about?” He sounds desperate, his chest heaving. Max clenches his fists by his side, like he wants to reach out.
You turn your head away, eyes filled with tears. “I’m gonna go see my mother. We’ll talk later.”
Max feels paralyzed, he can’t seem to do anything but watch you leave.
*
It’s past eight when you get home.
The first thing you notice is that the house is lit only by candles. A lot of candles throughout the house.
Max is nowhere to be seen, Jimmy and Sassy are the ones greeting you by passing between your legs. You bend over to pat their heads and give them a few ear scratches.
The more you walk into the house, the more your heart breaks. There on the table is a big bouquet of your favorite flowers along with a small card with the word ‘sorry’ written in Max’s handwriting waiting for you. The table is also set with the chinaware you only use on special occasions, and a few more candles.
When you turn around you see Max curled up on the sofa, your favorite weighted blanket —the one you use when you’re feeling down and Max is away for work— around his shoulders. He looks so cozy, you want to curl up next to him, but you are still a little hurt and angry from the argument you two had in the morning. You’re thinking about what you both said to each other when Max stirs, eyes trying to adjust to seeing in the dim light.
“Hey,” You say as a greeting, trying not to scare him.
Max turns around immediately, surprise crossing his features. “You’re home.”
“Yes? Sorry I didn’t say anything but mom wanted me to help her with gardening.” You shrug, leaving your bag and keys on the table next to the couch.
“I didn’t think you’d come back.” His voice is barely a whisper, but you hear him anyway. Max exhales deeply, clutching the blanket tightly around his shoulders.
“What?”
“I’m so sorry.” He blurts out, shoulders slumped. Max shuts his eyes tightly, like he’s in so much pain he can barely have them open. “I shouldn’t have talked to you like that. I should’ve listened to you—I’m really sorry. I don’t want us to argue like that again, I felt horrible because I love you and I promised myself I would never do something like this.” You let him talk, to spill everything he has inside of him. “After you left—I wanted to go after you but I knew you needed time. But it made me remember how my dad used to talk to my mom, how they would yell at each other while Vic and I hid in our rooms.” You are already moving towards him, even before you hear how his voice breaks.
You sit by his side, leaving some space between you two, hands itching to reach out and touch him, to draw him closer to you and hold him.
“I don’t want to be like him.”
“You’re nothing like him,” You move closer, taking his hands with yours, thumb caressing the back of them. “Don’t you ever dare to go there, okay? You will never be like him, Max. Do you understand?”
But he doesn’t look at you, he doesn’t say anything.
“Max, this is not the first and it’s definitely not going to be the last argument we have. But if we talk about it, if we give ourselves some time to think things through like we did today—this doesn’t mean you are a bad person, or that you are turning into your dad.” You cup his cheek with one of your hands, caressing his cheekbone as you look into his stormy blue eyes.
“I’m so sorry,” He says again, tears in the corners of his eyes. You smile softly at him when he begs for your forgiveness again.
“Can you forgive me too?”
“Darling, you’ve nothing to be sorry for.”
“Well, you’re wrong there.” You sniff, already feeling the tears wanting to stream down your face. “We were both wrong, don’t take all the blame.” Max opens his mouth to refute, but you shut him up with a kiss. It’s chaste, full of promises, and leaves you with blood pounding in your ears.
“Do you forgive me?”
Max nods, gaze fixed on your lips. “Yes,” He directs his gaze back to your eyes, and you can see so much regret in them. “Do you forgive me?”
“I don’t know,” You tease him by pretending to think about it. “it depends on what you made for dinner.”
A grin spreads across his face and he’s standing up in a second, tugging on your sleeve. “It’s definitely gonna make you forgive me.” He says, pulling the chair out for you to sit. “And if this doesn’t work, I have many other ways to make you forgive me.”
#꒰꒰ 📁 ─ verstappen cult files ꒱꒱#f1 x reader#max verstappen x reader#f1 imagine#max verstappen angst#max verstappen x you
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Ok but can you imagine if bombshell!reader who is pregnant does fall down somewhere?? Everyone, Spencer very much so, freaks out and she tries to play it off cool even though she’s really sore. She and baby are ok but she and Spencer are definitely shaken up by this and he’s even more hover-y from this 😭🥲
ty for requesting <3 pregnant!reader falling and panicking lovely bf spencer, 1.3k
“We’re like, the dream team,” you say, sewing your arm through the crook of Spencer’s. He’s trying to zip up your jacket, which is difficult given the ever-growing curve of your stomach. With one arm, it’s hopeless.
“We are,” he murmurs obligingly, thinking about how cold it is outside and how you’ve yet to give in to the ‘ugly-fest’ of maternity clothes at work. It’s a shame. You look adorable in them at home. “Maybe you should put on your hoodie.”
“It’s fine, it’s like, three steps between the station and the hotel.” You smile at him. He loves your eyes, your lashes, and he forgets to be stern.
“Let’s go, then.” He waves at Emily where she’s chatting with an officer. “You ready?” he asks.
Penelope pops her head out of the office with her laptop bag tucked under her arm. “Let’s go home, my chickens.”
You and Spencer devolve into one of your murmured conversations, giggling, pressed arm to arm as you and the team emerge from the warmth of the police station and into the cold winter air. It’s sub zero outside, Spencer’s sure, wanting to get you back out of the elements as quickly as possible.
He takes the steps first and holds out his hand a few beneath. Emily laughs, says, “He’s so chivalrous,” to Penelope’s delight.
“He’s always been our gentleman,” Penelope says.
You look eager to agree. “He’s my prince,” you tease gently, taking his hand, leaning just a little too far forward.
Your foot slips out from underneath you with a sound like a knife scraping the snow. You fall hard and fast, and the horror is that your one leg trips more than the other and you end up slamming flat on your side.
Spencer has you up again before the slush can so much as wet your clothes, but it doesn’t matter. Your eyes go wider than he’s ever seen them and your lips struggle down into an immediate frown, a wobbly expression, alarm in your voice as you say, “Oh, woah.”
“Oh my god, Y/N, are you okay?” Penelope asks, she and Spencer rushing down to the bottom of the steps to meet you.
“Sit her down, Spencer,” Emily says quickly, not scornful or anything but her concern turning her tone hard.
“It’s wet,” he says, as his head bubbles up with horrible statistics.
“Spencer,” you say tightly, “I’m fine.”
You don’t look fine. He yanks his suit jacket off and drops it to the floor, a write off, he and Penelope encouraging you to sit on the bottom step. Your eyes are filled with tears, he suspects from panic and pain at once, and he doesn’t really know what to do in this situation for a second, he has to think back. It’s hard to think and hold your hands at the same time.
“It’s okay,” he says, enthusing his voice with false pep.
“What should we do?” Penelope asks, quicker to panic than the rest of you.
Spencer bends down in front of you. You’re the only person that matters in that moment. “What hurts?” he asks, hand hovering over your side. “Does anything hurt?”
“Yeah,” you breathe out, before shaking your head, “What about–” You cut yourself off. “Yeah.”
Spencer takes your wrist. “I’m gonna call Dr. Cordell right now. Okay? Just as a precaution. That’s what you’re supposed to do, okay?”
“I think I hurt my hip,” you say smally.
With some help from the girls, Spencer gets you back to the hotel. He calls your doctor, and they decide to get you an emergency check up with an antenatal doctor he knows while you’re still out of state. It feels less panicky and more dread while you wait, but the appointment goes well, and you’re given the all clear a few hours after your fall.
You’re uncharacteristically quiet at the hotel. Spencer asks if you’re alright and you say, “Of course,” while he spends the rest of the evening watching you wince.
It’s getting ready for bed where he finally gets you to crack for him. You’re not expecting to be sore, that much is clear, and you’re bashful asking for his help. “I can’t get my shirt over my head,” you say from the bathroom, with no need to shout. He can hear you from his not so casual seat at the foot of the bed.
He lost his tie a few hours ago, and his suit jacket lays soggy in a plastic bag on top of his suitcase. He rolls his sleeves up as he eases into the small bathroom, eyes dropping to the naked bump of your stomach where your shirt is pooled. You have a yellowy bruise taking form on your hip. Another on your bump, like the lines of the stone steps.
“Angel,” he murmurs, fingers glancing over the bruise gently.
“Doesn’t hurt.”
“You don’t have to lie.”
You poke him. “Help me get changed, handsome.” You laugh at your demanding. “Please help me get changed.”
“So rude,” he says.
He grabs the ends of your shirt and pulls it up your back and over the back of your head so as to not agitate your cut up elbow again. You sigh as he pulls it clean, leaving you shirtless and gorgeous in the bathroom, despite all your worrying. He should tell you. He can’t not tell you, really.
“You’re so beautiful,” he says, taking your shoulders into his hands.
“Even with the baby weight?” you ask.
He rubs your arm. “You’ve never been this beautiful.”
“Oh, no, don’t say that.” You cover his arm with yours, hand over his, fingers intertwining loosely.
“You’re always…” He leans down. He’d been about to stop himself, but he continues, lips just an inch from yours, the two of you eye to eye. “Beautiful. I’m sorry about today, it was my fault.”
“It was my fault.”
“I should’ve been more careful, I knew it was cold enough for frost.”
“I should’ve been more careful,” you say, frowning at him indignantly, “I know how fragile I am right now and I’m not being careful enough.”
“You slipped,” he argues. It could only be an accident.
“What if she felt it?” you whisper.
Spencer was trying to assuage your fears and he’d been planning on a kiss, but a hug feels more important in that moment, a careful loop of his arms under yours. His few inches of height over you are especially helpful in steering clear of your stomach. “She didn’t feel it, Y/N, I promise. You took the fall for her, and the doctor said everything is just fine. She didn’t even know it was happening, I swear.”
You let out a long, slow breath. You nod into his should after a few moments. “Okay. Thank you for picking me back up, Spence.”
“That was impressive, right?”
You poke him some more as you let the entirety of your weight slouch into his front. “You’re quite impressive, Reid. I felt the muscle.” You kiss his neck, voice dropping to a murmur, “I’m okay.” He hasn’t realised how badly he needed reassurance too.
“I know.”
“Sorry if I was dramatic,” you say.
“Dramatic?” he laughs, thumb on your neck drawing shapes. “You tried to tell me you were fine. That’s the opposite of dramatic.”
“…Maybe I should slow down some. Maybe. Take some days off.”
Spencer kisses the top of your head. “That could be nice. You’ve been bouncing around for months. We could just spend a couple of days laying down, right? You can try out some of those maternity pyjamas you’re so reluctant to wear.”
“Why’d you buy so many?”
“I’m trying to take care of you. I thought I’d finally be allowed,” he says.
Your voice turns to a whisper. “You always take care of me, Spence. You really do.”
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction
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Silent Whispers
Wolverine (Logan Howlett) x Mutant!Reader
Part Two of Silent Whispers
Warnings: Angst, Mentions of Character Death, Jealousy, Logan getting slapped
AN: I DO NOT APPROVE OF ABUSE WITHIN ROMANTIC (ANY) RELATIONSHIPS!! I also got the idea from this fic by @moonpascal
The sound of blankets ruffling and the howling wind coming through a window doesn’t stop the murmurings from Logan. His body tosses and turns. At first you couldn’t make out what he was saying. You sit up in the bed, getting ready to wake him up. “Jean” The name came out softly through his lips. If you weren’t paying attention, you would have missed it. It would’ve mixed with the flow of the wind.
Everything in you stops as you stare at Logan’s blissful form. So many thoughts ran through your mind. After all this time, he’s still thinking about her. You can feel the tears threatening to spill from your eyes. You shake your head in hopes in getting rid of the thoughts. But it was futile. “Jean…” He whispers again. In a frenzy, he begins to repeat her name non-stop. You just couldn’t take it anymore and ran out of the room.
The next day the energy shift was obvious between you and Logan. You had begun to avoid him. It was to the point that even Ororo pulled you to aside. “Hey, What’s wrong?” You look away from her and fold your arms. “Nothing, Nothing is wrong” Storm raises an eyebrow at your words. “So why is your forehead frowning?” You use your hands to cover your forehead. “Me and my frowning forehead are out of here!” You take quick pace to leave the room, Storm right behind you. “It’s ok, you can trust me. You can tell me what’s going on! Just tell me what’s going on.” Thats when you whip around to face her, tears beginning to stream down your face.
“He doesn’t love me, Ororo. He doesn’t love me. I will always be second place to him.” Storm’s eyebrows knit together. Everything piecing together in her mind. She takes hold of your hands, a tight grip in fear you might run again. “It’s probably not what you think. Have you tried speaking to him? You know how extreme his nightmares are.” You scoff. “You wasn’t there. You don’t know how I feel. I was laying right next to him but his mind was on another woman. Not what I think? What else is there to think? He’s been in love with her since I met him. Even before that. I’m just a placeholder.”
Storm furrows her eyebrows. “Don’t be like that. Just talk to him.” You rip your hands away from her. “He did enough talking last night.” You are out the door before Storm could possibly say anything else. As you storm down the hall, out of the corner of your eye you see Logan. The rage that you were already feeling amplified tenfolds. You can already hear his footsteps right behind you, calling your name. You are quick to run up the stairs to your room, locking the door behind you.
You pick up your bag from under your bed, getting ready to fill them up with your things. That’s when you start to hear the banging. Logan calling your name repeatedly. “What’s the matter? You’ve been avoiding me all day. You know I won’t understand if you don’t tell me what’s going on.” Blood boiling within your body as you angrily throw things into the bag. “Understand me? Shouldn’t you understand yourself? Maybe understand your horrible nightmares.” It goes silent for a moment. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Bub.”
You zip up the bag. “Try again, James.” You make a quick pace to open the door. There Logan stands before you, confusion written all over his face. “You’re full of shit.” Logan cracks a smile. “I get that often.” Your hand whips across his smug face, causing a bit of blood dripping out of his mouth. “I get that often too.”
You grimace at his words, tears threatening to spill once again. “Why am I not good enough for you? Why is it always HER?! Jean, Jean, Jean. It’s always about her. When am I going to be your number one? When is it gonna just be me in your heart?”
Logan grabs ahold of you. “Don’t say things like that. I love you with everything in me.” You stare into Logan’s eyes before letting out a sigh. “Let go of me, Logan.” He reluctantly let’s go of your shoulders. You turn to pick up your bag off the bed. “I really did love you with my whole being. My heart, my soul, everything. And I am not going to be second place to someone I love.” Before Logan to respond, you (dramatically) jumped out the window and disappear in the dark.
Marvel Masterlist
(mostly logan lol)
#wolverine angst#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett#logan x reader#hugh jackman#hugh jackman wolverine#silent whispers logan
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Deku’s Type!
Masterlist
Tags: 18+, Sfw-ish, short drabble, fem!reader, aged up! characters, teacher! Deku, kinda vulgar and fucky, im gonna tag misogyny, reader is said to be “fucked in the head” whatever you want that to mean ^0^!
The boys gather round for drinks and discuss the type of women Deku seems to be fond of, much to his dismay…
“Sounds like Deku’s type,” Katsuki says, smirk in his voice.
Izuku frowns. “I do not have a type.”
Now that makes the table still for a second, not long enough for Izuku to predict the thoughts of his friends, but enough for the rest of the guys to come to the same conclusion.
Katsuki, Denki and Sero are the first to burst out in laughter. Katsuki’s cackle the loudest of them all.
“Are you fuckin’ serious?” Katsuki laughs so hard he doesn’t even care that Denki is half laid over him, “You don’t see that shit?”
“Come on…” Denki says, still slapping Katsuki’s thigh as he laughs, “you have such a type!”
Izuku frowns, sterner, deciding to ignore the immature three and turning to his other friends for support. Both Iida and Shouto look away, their expressions telling.
“I do not have a type,” Izuku reiterates, firmly.
Katsuki shakes his head, finally shoving Denki off him. “All those girls you’ve dated? Exact fuckin’ same.”
Even Tokoyami turns his head, eyes never leaving his drink but twinkling with an unfamiliar mirth.
“What does that even mean?!” Izuku exasperates, looking around for a single ally.
“It means,” Mineta chimes in, and although Izuku enjoys his company, he already knows he’s about to hear something deplorable, “you like them sick in the head!”
Shouto can’t hold in his sputter, finally contributing to the conversation— with a laugh. The rest of the table is hooting, a few groans at the wording but nothing at the sentiment. All while Izuku looks absolutely scandalised, clutching his chest, eyes wide open.
“That’s horrible!” Izuku cries, so stunned he can’t even trail off into one of his signature rambles in defence, “that’s- that’s. What?!”
“All the girls you’ve liked man…” Sero starts, “they’re not exactly little miss sunshines are they.” He stops, which Izuku almost takes reprieve in until he continues, “you seem to like them a little off putting.”
“Yeah so he can fucking fix them,” Katsuki snorts.
“It’s your saviour complex,” Denki adds, chin tilted up, trying to look profound.
Izuku is quick to interject, waving his hands around. “You’re the pro heroes.” The poor boy tries his best to convince. “We all have saviour complexes!”
“Not like you do, mon chéri,” Aoyama tuts, then winks before saying, “Hero of Japan.”
“Izuku, They do still call you an honorary pro.” Shouto is trying to be nice, Izuku thinks. “And I’m sure your students think the same.”
Izuku grimaces, he knows he’s always had a complex that encompassed so much more than just his dreams to be a hero, but he doesn’t need it sullied by… that.
“Don’t ruminate.” Katsuki presses a drink into Izuku’s hands. “You like women a little fucked up, so what.”
Katsuki’s words do nothing to comfort Izuku, instead it has Denki and Mineta laughing all over again while Kirishima attempts to calm them down. Iida scolds Katsuki a little, doing a half bow in apology to the passing waiter clearly peeved by all the noise. Deku pays no attention, beginning to spiral in his head.
It feels wrong to view the women of his past that way. To view you that way. But he’s not an idiot, maybe a little blind at times but now that the proof is there— oh god—
“Listen, Midoriya, I am sure there are many reasons you have loved the women you have.” Iida notices the growing dread upon Izuku’s face. “You also like to save people. There is nothing wrong with that.”
Tokoyami and Shouji nod in agreement, Ojiro giving his own sympathetic smile.
“Yeah bro.” Kirishima raises a fist in camaraderie, though it’s definitely out of pity. “It’s manly to take care of others!”
“Think he more than takes cares of ‘em,” Katsuki slickly adds, in an artful voice that Izuku is more than familiar with, “the fucker get off on that shit.”
This time, it’s Shouto who scolds him, Katsuki’s implications clear enough for even him to catch on. They rest of the guys begin to bicker in the background, one half in defence of Izuku’s less than innocent tastes in women, the other intent on making fun of the golden boy for once.
Though the attention is finally off him, it does not help Izuku feel any better.
Because there’s a thought that lingers… it’s a sick thought, a terrible, horrible, awfully honest thought.
Shit, he does like them a bit fucked up.
My truth is i still don’t know how to punctuate dialogue… pleek don’t look and none of dat…
Anyways I kind of wanna elaborate on Deku’s hero complex coming out in other ways in the 8 years of studying and becoming a teacher, like someone has to deal with it…
#izuku x reader#deku x reader#deku x y/n#mha x reader#x reader#deku imagine#fanfic#bnha x reader#bnha x you#quitesins dk#Drabble#quite shorts#mha fic#izuku midoria x reader#midoriya x y/n#midoriya x reader
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Kinktober Day 9 - Anal
Price x F!Reader - 1.6k (on ao3)
summary: After John catches you breaking a rule, he decides to punish you in a way he knows you won't enjoy. (You POV)
cw: very unrealistic anal sex, very minimal anal prep, painful sex, punishment sex, consensual bdsm dynamics but reader is a brat who pitches a fit the whole time and there's no mention of a safeword, daddy kink, spanking
“Ow!”
“Hush, love.”
“John, it hurts.”
“It’s supposed to, angel, you know that. Wouldn’t be much of a punishment if you enjoyed yourself, now would it?”
You know that, of course you know that, but it doesn’t make the burning in your ass any easier to bear. Tears stream down your face as you squeeze your eyes tightly shut, breaths high and short as you try and fail to think past the pain.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, okay?” You pant, wriggling against your bonds. Your ankles are tied to your wrists, your wrists then tied to the headboard above you, leaving you folded in half and deeply uncomfortable. The only benefit is that your whipped-raw ass is kept from being touched by anything with you bent the way you are, a pillow beneath your hips keeping your holes tilted up for John to do whatever he likes. “I’ll be better, promise.”
John huffs, lips curling into a condescending smile as he continues to scissor his fingers inside your ass, hardly any lube at all slicking his way.
“You said that last time I caught you, didn’t you, love?”
You keen as his fingers fuck in and out of you at an even pace, stretching you in an almost detached way. “But–”
“No,” he scolds, silencing you with just the one syllable. “I gave you grace the first time, hm? Let you off with hardly more than a warning.”
Your face flushes in sudden anger. “I couldn’t sit for a week after what you did to me!”
You yelp when he forces a third finger into you, the penetration rough and horribly burning as he doesn’t wait for your body to adjust for him. You can feel each digit wiggling inside of you, the barest amount of lube he’d drizzled on your hole doing absolutely nothing to make the stretch even close to bearable.
“You wanna make it two this time?” He asks, one brow cocked expectantly as he spreads his fingers inside of you, forcing your body to accommodate him no matter how much it doesn’t want to. “I am trying to be nice, love, but if you need an even firmer hand…”
You yelp at the way he crooks and tugs his fingers, sharp pain streaking through you. “No! No, no, I’m sorry, I’ll stop– I won’t complain anymore, promise.”
He hums, fingers going back to leisurely stretching you, though still going at a pace far too fast for your body to adjust to. “That’s better. But what should you be calling me?”
You squeeze your eyes shut, body overheating.
He pulls out when you don't answer, tapping your hole with two stiff fingers hard enough to make you squirm. “Answer me, doll.”
You whine, face pinched is discomfort as his taps get more and more harsh, your hole stinging something fierce.
“Ow, ow, okay, okay, Daddy, Daddy, I can listen, I can be good!”
“Good, good girl,” he purrs, fingers slipping back inside of you. “Now was that so hard?”
You throw your head from side to side, rubbing your damp face against your arms. “You’re hurting me, Daddy.”
“Oh, love,” he coos, pulling out again and lifting himself up to hover above you. “That’s the whole point. You wouldn’t learn anything if I just make you feel good every time you break a rule, now would you?”
You feel the plush head of his cock line up against your nearly-dry hole, and you can’t help the way your breath hitches in your chest, tears streaking down your face. “Daddy, please don’t.”
The expression on his face is pure compassion, but you know there’s nothing you could do or say to stop your punishment in its tracks. “You’re gonna take your punishment like a good girl for me, love.”
You clench your hands into fists where they’re tied above you, desperate to reach forward and hold him for some security when you feel so off-kilter.
You nearly go numb when he first penetrates you, thick cock spearing you open even when you feel like your body should have no give for him. He holds himself up with one hand on your plush thigh, the other on the headboard above you, and doesn’t stop pushing his hips forward until he’s fully seated inside of you.
You don’t realize that you haven’t taken a breath until one of his hands taps you lightly on the cheek, his body heavy over yours. “Breathe for me, love.”
Your first breath is a gasp, then a groan when he suddenly feels so much larger within you.
“Daddy,” you whine, breaths uneven as you desperately try to come to terms with the pain wracking you. Usually John’s cock in any of your holes comes with at least some pleasure, but you can’t feel anything but the pain with what little lube he gave you. “Daddy, it hurts.”
He doesn’t chide you for repeating yourself like you know he could, only coos and strokes your thigh. “Keep breathing for me, doll, that’s it. Let’s get this over with, shall we?”
You nearly scream when he pulls out of you, the pain beyond anything you’ve felt before, certainly beyond any punishment John’s ever given you. You can’t think of anything as he drills back into you, letting his weight carry him down as he fucks you into the bed.
You babble mindlessly while he fucks you, his thrusts long and deep as he uses you to get off. You can’t force yourself to say any actual words, reduced to nothing but tears and animal sounds while you take what he’s giving you.
“There we go, attagirl,” John grunts above you, fingers tightening on your thigh as his brows furrow in pleasure. You can hardly see him through the tears in your eyes, but you can tell from his moans that he’s enjoying himself. “Nice and tight for me, yeah?”
The sound you make is as close to an agreement you can make, even as the overwhelming pain has started to dull into something deeper, achier.
“That’s right, take it. Take your punishment, just like that. Does it hurt?”
You wail, trying to kick out at him on instinct but unable to move even an inch with the binds and his weight pinning you.
“I know, I know it does,” he pants, thrusts beginning to lose their rhythm. “But you need it, don’t you? Need me to hurt you so you don’t break any of your rules again.”
It’s not a question but you nod as best you can anyway, desperate to please him and end your torture as soon as possible.
“That’s why I have to do this.” His composure is slipping, his teeth gritted as sweat drips from his forehead to yours. “Need to teach you a fuckin’ lesson, teach you to respect me.”
“I do!” You shout, your first words in what feels like hours. “I do, I do!”
“Do you?” He snarls, hand lifting just long enough to smack your thigh before holding you tight again, ignoring your cry. “Doesn’t sound like it to me.”
It takes you a second to realize what he wants, and he punishes you with several more harsh smacks, across both thighs, making you squeal. Your eyes fly open when you know what he expects, voice rushing out of you in one breath. “Daddy! Daddy!”
“There you go,” he hisses, and this time when he shoves you into the bed he manages to hit a new angle inside of you, one that has you shouting so loudly you can feel your throat tear to shreds. “That’s it, squeeze me tight baby, c’mon.”
Even with all your desire to be good, to end your punishment, you can’t force yourself to squeeze him any tighter than you already are, the pain still too much. It doesn’t seem to matter though, as only a few moments later he’s dropping his head to stare at where he penetrates you, panting through gritted teeth as he comes inside your ass.
Your breaths are shaky as he slowly rolls his hips, letting your body milk him. You're taut with pain, your muscles tense and already sore from your time spent bound.
John takes a few long seconds to gather himself and ride his own orgasm before looking back up at you, all of his previous sternness gone from his expression, replaced with the sweet Daddy you’ve come to love.
“Good job, doll,” he whispers, the words almost breathed into your mouth. “Did so well for me, hm?”
You stare up at him, tears filling your water line and too fucked-out to speak without more prompting. He doesn’t expect words from you, though, just lets your body keep his cock warm while he shifts to stroke your face, wiping your tears with a thumb.
“Good girl, good girl. You took your punishment well.”
The praise sends another round of tears down your cheeks, the soft words warming your chest. His smile grows as he watches you.
“Now,” he pushes up, then holds his cock by the root. “Let’s get you out of these ties and into the bath, hm?”
You’re nodding when he pulls out, unable to contain your sobs at the pain, then the relief. He talks you through the whole thing, shushing and humming as he frees you from your bindings and helps you stretch. You cry through the whole process, emotions you couldn’t describe if you tried ruling your mind.
“There we are, there’s my pretty doll,” John coos, once he’s got you cradled in his arms. “Such a good girl for me, so good for Daddy.”
You float in the endorphin rush of having done well for him, your mind finally letting you calm down now that there’s comfort instead of just panic. The pain is still unmistakable, and you already know you’ll be refusing to walk tomorrow, but you can handle it as long as John keeps holding you close and running his hands soothingly over your skin.
#bo writes#john price x reader#john price x you#price x reader#price x you#captain price x reader#captain price x you#captain john price x reader#captain john price x you#cod fanfic#call of duty fanfic#kinktober 2024#kinktober#kinktober day 9
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𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫 | angus tully x reader
sequel to 𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲, won't really make much sense without reading that!
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 | holiday break can only last so long, but angus wants this to be more than a fling-- and you, as much as you want to deny it, already know it's more than a fling. the question remains if either one of you will admit it.
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 | 5.3k
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | SMUT (18+ only!!), age gap (not huge but angus is 18 and the reader is just out of college), semi-public sex, breeding kink, very inappropriate activities in a church, secret relationship, a wee bit of angst and fluff at the end!
part 3 coming soon!
“Fuck, I don’t wanna go back,” he groaned, dropping his head defeatedly into the crook of your neck. “I never wanna go back to that horrible fucking school.”
“I guess you’ll just see me at Easter break then, huh?” you purred, grazing your teeth over his ear.
“You know, if sex with you keeps lining up with the Catholic calendar, it’s gonna give me a complex or something,” he noticed.
“Oh, I can do better than that,” you beamed. “Next time you see me at Mass, I won’t be wearing any panties. And you’ll be the only other one who knows.”
He perked up again, balancing himself over you with bent arms against the mattress. “I swear, you’re a dream come true. A really fucked up dream I had after seeing a porno mag or something.”
You laughed, but it was cut off with him pulling you into another kiss— sweet and slow, with both of you smiling against each other. With your limbs tangled together under the sheets, you melted together into your bed; and no, none of it really seemed real yet. Every time this happened, you couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that you were hooking up with Angus Tully. Frankly, you were sort of trying not to think about it, at least not too much. If you really tried, you could look at his face and see the little kid you babysat all those years ago, and it just made you feel sort of awful about it… yet you couldn’t bring yourself to stop.
Your smile fell into a gasp when he started to kiss your neck, his hands guiding your back as it arched slightly. When he pressed his body against yours, you felt him getting hard against your leg, and you groaned softly.
“Fuck, Angus, again?” you whined. “We already went twice—”
“I’m leaving in two days,” he explained, “I need you as many times as I can get away with it.”
You wanted to protest, say something about how sore you were or about how he needed to leave and go back home before someone noticed he was gone— but his slender fingers were already diving between your legs and making you just moan instead.
“See? You’re wet already,” he noticed with a playful mockery to his tone. “I’ve gotta take care of you, baby…”
Oh, you couldn’t stand it when he talked like that— when he made you feel so vulnerable to him, so paradoxically submissive. When this started a couple weeks back, it was the other way around: you were the cool, older woman with all the power. You told him what you wanted and he was more than happy to oblige, never questioning you— he was obedient, basically. But once you’d had a few more encounters, he realized that you wanted him just as badly… that he could make you desperate, if he wanted. Once he’d had the smallest taste of control, he was suddenly a changed man; now, he loved to tease and taunt you, see how far he could push you, even once he made you beg— and you expected you’d never get to live that down.
He watched your face with a mischievous smile as he slowly slid two fingers into you, watching the way you winced and then relaxed. “I’ll be careful,” he promised, “I know you’re all sensitive still… thought you might wake up the whole house with that last one.”
You rolled your eyes, but your cheeks flushed, remembering how he’d had to cover your mouth with his hand when he made you come. These were issues you hadn’t considered much before, since you spent most of the year living in a dorm where you didn’t really care if anyone heard what you were up to. Staying in your parents’ house again— and secretly fucking their friends’ son in your childhood bedroom— posed new challenges to say the least.
You gasped when his fingers curled inside you, rubbing that spot that made everything clench for a moment. “Mm,” he observed encouragingly, “like that?”
“Yes,” you hissed under your breath. Just when you began to let your eyes fall shut, they shot open when he added a third finger inside you. “Fuck!”
“Oh, don’t be dramatic,” he scolded, “you can fit three fingers just fine— my cock’s bigger than all that anyways.”
He twisted the fingers inside you as your hips rocked, shivers running over your skin. “Yeah, but still— fuck, it’s a lot…”
“You take it just fine,” he assured. “You take whatever I give you, huh?”
“Sh-shut up,” you whimpered, and he laughed softly.
“You’re so good for me,” he continued anyways, making you bite your lip in hopes he wouldn’t notice his effect on you. Whenever he said stuff like that, you just wanted to ask him who the fuck he thought he was— it made you want to shove him off of you and pin him down, remind him of his place. But you never did, because letting him take control always felt so damn good…
His head dipped down a bit under the covers— and his lips latched onto one of your nipples, making you gasp and grab his hair with one of your hands. “Oh god— yes,” you praised, shuddering a bit as he suckled hard on the bud.
He moaned around it, his free hand holding the other breast and keeping you down even when your back longed to arch deeper. “You get so wet when I do this,” he noticed as he pulled away briefly, moving to suck the other for a moment as his fingers gently pumped into you. When he pushed them in all the way to the knuckle, at the same time that his tongue swirled around your nipple just right, your patience finally gave in.
“Just fuck me,” you begged, tugging harder on his curls as you felt him smile against your skin. “God, I just— fuck—”
He pulled away from your breast with a pop and a grin. “Just ask nicely, baby, and I’m all yours.”
“I know you want to, just fuck me,” you growled, but he shook his head and you clenched your jaw.
“You can say it,” he encouraged, “just use the magic word.”
You rolled your eyes, hating the juvenile way of describing it, but his fingers were still moving inside you and you just needed it too bad— “Please,” you breathed. “Please fuck me.”
“There you go,” he praised, slowly pulling his drenched fingers out of you and moving his hips to line up with yours instead. He was so hard; you were almost impressed with his resolve, though at the moment you were mostly just annoyed with it. “Look up at me,” he demanded, making you meet his gaze before he pushed himself inside you.
It was almost too intense, looking right into his eyes as he thrust into you carefully— you bit your lip, watching the heavy sigh of relief leave him as he filled you.
“Fuck,” he whispered, his eyes scanning all over your face and watching your expression change as he pressed his cock as deep as possible. “You’re fucking perfect.”
You didn’t really believe that, but you at least would concede that this moment was perfect.
You held tighter onto him, legs wrapping around his hips, as he leaned in closer and moaned against your neck. “How am I supposed to leave when you feel this fucking good?” he groaned lowly, and you felt yourself already beginning to pulse inside as you moved closer to the edge. “I feel good too, right?”
Poor thing— if only he knew that it was his own fault you withheld praise, just because he sounded too precious when he asked you for reassurance like that. He was really fucking talkative, way more than you expected; sometimes you thought if you didn’t say anything, he’d just go off on these wild tangents about how bad he needs you. “You feel good,” you replied, trying to keep it a little vague so he’d ask for more.
“How good?” he asked with a grin, and you smiled, too, because he was wonderfully predictable sometimes.
“So good,” you cooed, “so fucking good that I’m gonna come way too fast.”
“Hey, that’s my thing,” he joked. His stamina had definitely increased a lot in just a few encounters, but he still had a habit of coming quickly if you got him a bit too riled up. Not that you really minded… it was still cute, after all, and he usually made it up to you one way or another.
He picked up his pace, letting out a low moan against your ear. “Tell me you want me to come inside you,” he ordered, panting with each quick thrust.
“Fuck, Angus, I want you come,” you replied, whispering against his ear. “I want you to fill me—”
“Fuck…”
“And put all your come so deep in me—”
“Fuck, baby,” he whined again. “I’m so fucking close.”
You whined, running your fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck, feeling your chest get tighter as you moved closer to the edge.
“Tell me you want me to breed you,” he added; okay, so much for predictable…
“Wh-what?” you choked, feeling suddenly hot all over. “Angus, I—”
“I know, you won’t,” he soothed, “it’s just, you know, pretend… just say you want it, please.”
You swallowed but nodded, holding on tighter to the back of his neck. “I… I want you to get me pregnant.”
“God, yes,” he whined through his teeth, fucking you faster.
“I-I want you to fill me up so I can have a baby,” you continued in a whisper, and he moaned again as his grip on your hips tightened. You could hardly believe what you were saying, nor that he had asked you to say it, and yet it made the most wonderfully bizarre feeling stir inside you— strangest of all, it was turning you on. “F-fuck, Angus, I’m gonna come.”
“You’re gonna come with me?” he pressed, sighing when you nodded. “Fuck, let’s do it— we’ll come together. That’ll definitely get you pregnant.”
“Jesus, Angus,” you hissed, “what are you talking about?”
“It doesn’t get you hot, thinking about it?” he challenged. “Thinking about us making a baby right now? Imagining how good it would feel to let me breed you and make you a mommy?”
“Sh-shut the fuck up,” you grunted, but you were already trying to hold it back.
“God, you want it so bad,” he noticed— how was he only this perceptive in these sorts of situations? “You want me to come in you and knock you up, I can tell. You’re gonna come just thinking about it.”
Even though it wasn’t really just thinking about it— it was him fucking you deep and fast and hard after a whole night of making love— you were forced to bite your lip and nod.
“C’mon, baby, I wanna feel it again,” he purred. “Feels so fucking perfect when you come around me— you’re mine, aren’t you?”
Your heart jumped and your eyes shut tight. “God,” you groaned in frustration, but he just smiled and held you tighter.
“It’s okay,” he cooed, “nobody has to know, it’s just me— you’re mine, right? Say it. Say you’re mine.”
You whined when it hit you— and nothing had ever hit you quite like that. Tensing up inside, pulsing uncontrollably, you felt the weight on your chest lift and you dug your nails into his shoulders as he fucked you through it. “Fuck! I-I’m yours!” you blurted out, unable to stop it when you were drowning in your ecstasy like that.
He swore against your ear, and gave you hardly one more thrust before falling over the edge himself, groaning weakly as his body sank down onto yours.
You hoped against all odds that he wouldn’t force you to address any of what you’d just said; he looked so exhausted that you almost wanted to let him fall asleep here if it meant avoiding that conversation. But it was just like him to only give you about ten seconds of silence before running his mouth again.
He started by just sitting up enough to kiss you on the cheek, then the lips, then the side of your forehead when you turned away. “That was so hot,” he announced, still catching his breath, as he grinned down at you.
“That was… different,” you admitted as you hoped your embarrassment wouldn’t show on your face. “You weren’t serious, right? I mean, you know I’m on the pill—”
“Yeah, of course,” he assured, “it’s just, I don’t know, a fantasy.”
You raised an eyebrow as you looked at him. “Respectfully, I thought it was more of a nightmare— you know, it’s kinda worst-case-scenario here.”
“No, no, I know— that’s why it’s fun,” he explained. “‘Cause it’s, like, bad. Well, not bad, but… scary. In a good way! Like a rollercoaster or something.”
“Yeah, sure,” you scoffed, “just like a rollercoaster. That’s why the maternity ward at the hospital looks so much like Six Flags.”
“You know what I mean,” he laughed. “It’s just… if it actually happened it would be a huge fucking deal… but just imagining it, just for fun I mean, it makes my heart race. See?”
He picked up one of your hands and put it on his neck, pressing your fingers into his pulse so you could feel its rapidness. “Fair enough,” you shrugged, “you sure scared the crap out of me for a second.”
“You liked it,” he cooed, kissing the tip of your nose. “You like being mine, too.”
Even if you could’ve hid the reaction on your face somehow, the way your weak muscles still found the energy to clench around his softening cock gave you away; he purred as he smiled, kissing you more tenderly on the lips this time.
“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered to you.
“I probably look like a mess,” you laughed quietly, “I don’t even want to know what my hair looks like after a night like this.”
“Yeah, that’s how I like you, though— you look pretty all fucked up,” he explained.
You glanced over as he moved to bury his face in your neck again, only to see the slightest blue glow in the window: the early light just before dawn. “Angus, it’s almost morning,” you noticed. “You need to go.”
“Not yet,” he begged, hugging you tighter. “I bet I can make you come again—”
“No,” you snapped, “if your parents find out you snuck out— and if anyone knows you came here—”
“Baby, c’mon,” he pouted, “I’ll be quick, nobody’s gonna know—”
“I swear to god, Angus—”
“Fine, fine,” he sighed, “then just kiss me before I go.”
He held your cheek and turned your face to his, and you kissed him; you hated these kisses, the ones that felt like goodbye. They were amazing, of course, but they always broke your heart.
“I’ll see you later?” he assumed.
“You’ll see me on Sunday,” you replied.
“Nooo, I can’t wait that long,” he whined.
“Yes you can,” you breathed. “Now get up, please, before I have to literally kick you out.”
“Fine,” he relented, climbing off of you and searching the floor for his boxers and t-shirt.
“I still can’t believe you ran here without even putting a coat on,” you remembered, “it’s below freezing out.”
“Whatever, it’s not even a block to my house,” he rolled his eyes.
“Mr. Lindy across the street takes out the trash insanely early in the morning— what if he sees you running back to your house in the snow without any fucking clothes on?!”
“He was young once, right? He’ll understand,” Angus laughed.
“I’m hoping he doesn’t understand,” you groaned, “‘cause if he figures it out and tells my parents—”
“I know,” he breathed, slipping on his shoes and leaning over the bed to kiss you quickly. “It’ll be fine, okay?”
“Okay,” you smiled back.
There was a brief pause before Angus dropped his arms down against his sides, hitting his legs; “Well, I… guess I’ll see you at Mass,” he announced.
“That’s gotta be the weirdest thing to say after hooking up with somebody,” you decided.
“I couldn’t think of anything else!” he defended. “I’m about to jump out your window, it’s already a pretty weird transition.”
“Okay, first of all, please don’t jump,” you replied, “but fair enough. I’ll see you at Mass.”
He hesitated, suddenly giving you one more kiss— one that lingered a little more— before opening your window and beginning to climb out.
~
Mass was certainly a lot more interesting when you kept feeling Angus’ eyes on you. His family had been just barely on time for the service, so you hadn’t been able to talk to him before it started; you could tell he was dying to know if you’d gone through with it.
You tugged on the bottom of your dress as you adjusted yourself in the pew; it was definitely a weird feeling, and you couldn’t stop worrying that someone, somehow, would see up your skirt and get an eyeful. The anxiety of it was oddly arousing, though— it made you understand a bit better what Angus had said about the whole scary in a good way thing.
When you occasionally spared a glance at him, you noticed that Angus still looked a little underslept; you’d both been up all night just a couple days ago, but the difference was that your parents didn’t really mind if you spent most of the next day in your room, so you’d had a chance to catch up— Angus’ parents were more determined to make use of his time off from school, and had him doing all kinds of chores and activities on Saturday that prevented him from getting more than a quick nap here and there.
And they’d tugged him out of bed bright and early for church today, so he was probably still feeling the effects of an all-nighter. That said, he certainly didn’t seem lacking in energy at the moment— he kept wringing his hands, constantly glancing at you, so noticeably that his mom lightly smacked him on the shoulder when she noticed it.
But you were looking across the aisle at him, too. If for no other reason than how cute he looked in his shirt and tie.
After the service, as everyone mingled around coffee and donuts, Angus made a beeline towards you— you’d kind of hoped he would be a little more subtle.
“Hey,” he greeted, and you just nodded at him with a smirk. “It’s been too long.”
He glanced at all the people passing by, stepping closer to you to let someone walk past but never moving back; he waited until no one was too close before he spoke again in a lower voice.
“Are you really not wearing any…?” he asked, an extra sparkle in his eye and a mischievous smile on his face. His smile dropped a bit when you nodded, though, and his eyes raked over you in the most intoxicating, lascivious way. You were sure you’d never had someone look at you like that, like they’d give anything to devour you right then— and with no panties to hold it, you felt your arousal slicken where your thighs rubbed together.
He cleared his throat and glanced over his shoulder, making sure no one was looking over at him as he adjusted his corduroys awkwardly; you licked your lips, a little too flattered by the effect you had on him.
“That’s, um, that’s…” he mumbled, tripping over his words. “That’s really… yeah.”
“Really what?” you challenged as you bit your lip briefly, moving closer to him and all but batting your eyes up at him.
“It’s really fucking sexy,” he whispered.
“Yeah?” you cooed. “I think it’s sexy that you think it’s sexy.”
“I haven’t stopped thinking about—” he began.
“I know,” you sighed, “me too.”
“I wasn’t even tired that day— I was wired, actually,” he laughed quietly. “I just… I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”
Your heart’s pace picked up a bit, and you glanced away briefly. “I, um… I thought about you, too.
“There’s gotta be somewhere we can go,” he whispered. “It’s a big place— everyone’s here, if we just… found an empty room—”
“Jesus, Angus— in a church?!” you hissed.
“Come on,” he begged, “I don’t know when we’ll get a chance again— and I’m leaving tomorrow— and I want you so bad—”
“Shh,” you warned him, making sure no one was nearby again. “We’ll figure something out— just not here. It’s too risky.”
“But I need you now,” he insisted, voice lower and darker as he stepped just a bit closer to you. “It won’t take us long— I mean, it definitely won’t take me long, after spending the last two days thinking about you.”
You crossed your arms, looking down at the floor, and you felt him lean in over you. “Please, baby?” he whispered under his breath.
Releting, you took a glance at the crowd and made sure nobody was looking in your direction. “You go find an empty room in the east wing. I’ll talk to a few people— so it doesn’t look like we’re going together— and I’ll come find you in a few minutes, okay?”
“Great,” he beamed. “Uh, which way is east again?”
You pointed him in the right direction and watched him bound away, sighing to yourself as you re-entered the crowd. You got a lot of questions about your plan now that you finished your degree— and you found yourself repeating the same stock answer about how your graduate program didn’t start until the fall so you had the spring and summer to stay home. Even though you knew you needed to kill some time to look less suspicious, you found yourself glancing constantly towards the east wing, getting more and more impatient for your chance to slip away as unnoticed as possible.
As the crowd was clearing out and nearly everyone’s attention was turned onto somebody’s new baby, you took the opportunity to disappear into the dark hallway. As you peered around the doors, you saw Angus peeking out at you through one of the little windows; the door opened, and you slipped into an abandoned Sunday school classroom, barely having time to gingerly shut the door behind you before you felt his lips on your neck and his hand sliding up your thigh.
“That took forever,” he complained, and before you could remind him it had hardly been five minutes, his fingers were exploring between your legs. “Fuck, what’re you so wet for?” he teased, and you groaned as you pulled him closer by his pants and hopped up to sit on the low bookshelf nearby.
“Just hurry up,” you hissed, “we need to get this over with before somebody finds us here.”
He opened his fly quickly, but struggled slightly to free himself from the confines of his trousers; you hummed a bit when he got it out, pressing it against you right away as you moved your hips up.
Thrusting into you all at once, you both sighed slowly; you took hold of his shoulders, he grabbed onto your hips, and instantly he began to fuck into you impatiently.
“God, you’re so tight,” he hissed against your ear. “Touch yourself— I want you to come, too.”
You reached between your bodies to put a few fingers on your clit, rubbing fast in hopes that you could catch up with him.
“Do you always do what you’re told?” he mocked playfully.
“I think the fact that we’re doing this right after church proves that I don’t,” you replied.
“Guess you only do what I tell you to,” he shrugged, which really made you want to talk back, but you couldn’t because you were trying not to moan too loudly.
He moved faster inside you, and something about the angle of sitting up on the shelf was making him hit just the right spot— or maybe you were sensitive from the exhilarating fear of getting caught.
“What if I got you pregnant here?” he purred, making you arch your back slightly. “Wouldn’t that be funny?”
“You’ve got a weird sense of humor, Tully,” you breathed, struggling not to let your voice come out all whiny and weak.
“Knocked up at St. Mary’s… it’s what God would want, right?”
“Do you never shut up?” you hissed.
“No,” he smirked, “you’re cute when you’re ticked off at me.”
His eyes met yours, and you felt a strange emotion stir in your chest: you bit your lip, willing yourself to tear away from his gaze, but you found it impossible somehow.
One of his hands moved from your hip up to your chest, palming at you through your dress. You tensed up inside, making him wince a bit, and you couldn’t believe how close you were already.
“Oh god, baby, m’gonna come,” you whimpered, moving your hand even faster over your clit; he groaned in approval, leaning in to kiss all along your neck.
“Come for me,” he pleaded, “I’m so fucking close— please come, fuck—”
“R-right there,” you gasped, gripping his shoulder tighter— actually, that wasn’t the only place you were gripping him tighter. He was struggling to maintain the pace of his thrusts, in fact, with how hard your walls were bearing down on him. “Yes, yes, yes—”
“Not too loud,” he warned you, and you bit hard on your own lip to suppress your moan: it stayed in your throat instead, and you heard him gasp as he heard and felt you reaching your peak. He had to take his hand off your chest and put it on the bookshelf under you to help keep you upright, and he looked down between your bodies to watch himself give you a few final thrusts.
He stopped suddenly, whimpering slightly as he buried himself in you as deep as he could go; you sighed and laid back on the bookshelf again, having to tilt your head to avoid a figurine of some prophet or saint that you had absolutely no interest in identifying at the moment.
Angus took a moment to catch his breath, before looking back over his shoulder and through the door’s window to make sure no one was in the hallway. He pulled his cock out of you carefully and did his best to fit it back into his pants. As you felt a warm oozing feeling between your legs, your face began to heat up.
“Maybe I didn’t think this through,” you realized.
“What?” he mumbled.
“I’m gonna have to go out there with nothing on under my dress, with your come leaking out of me.”
He bit his lip.
“It’s not sexy, Angus! It’s very inconvenient!” you frowned.
“It’s both,” he insisted. “It’s very much both.”
~
Though you did get another chance to see Angus before he left, it wasn’t that sort of rendezvous, unfortunately. Although, just sitting and talking with him was wonderful, too— in an entirely different way. See, that was the thing that scared you most, even more than how badly you’d come to crave his touch: how happy you felt just being with him.
He was funny, and weird, and seemed to think your stories from college were fascinating; he was well-read, especially for a high school student, and you two could chat about your favorite books— a hobby most of your classmates in college found too nerdy to sympathize with.
It probably looked totally wholesome from the outside: two childhood friends catching up while they were back home for a while. And you, you probably looked normal and cool on the outside— you were trying to, at least. But inside, you were terrified. You wanted it to be like what Angus said— scary, in a good way, like a rollercoaster— but you were starting to just feel sick. You know, like an actual rollercoaster would…
“Everyone there is so… dumb,” Angus decided as he leaned back, looking up at the ceiling.
“That can’t be true, it’s a good school,” you tried to encourage him.
“I mean, maybe they could be smart, but they act like morons,” he clarified. “They hate me, too, and I don’t even really know why.”
“Probably because they can sense that you think they’re all morons,” you suggested; and he looked over at you, as if he’d genuinely never thought of that before.
But instead of addressing that, he sat up again and changed the subject. “My parents probably want me to go back and, like, put my trunk in the car and stuff…”
“Right,” you nodded, “you should go.”
“Yeah— b-but, listen, um, before I do…” he trailed off, leaning a little closer to you on the couch. “I wanted to, you know, talk. About something.”
“We’ve been talking for half an hour,” you noticed.
“Right, uh— I meant something specific,” he explained, his cheeks seeming to get a little bit more pink. “I… I won’t be back until spring break, you know…”
“Uh huh,” you nodded, raising an eyebrow as you wondered what he was getting at.
“And, you know, we’ve been having such a great time,” he went on, and your heart twisted. You’d heard this spiel before: the things are so good now, why do we need to put a label on it? why can’t we just have fun talk. The you’re great, but not good enough for more than this talk. You decided to jump in and spare him before he said anything too… honest.
“I get it,” you promised, and he looked at you nervously. “We’re gonna be too far apart for too long— and you shouldn’t, you know, feel like you’re tied down to anything. It’s okay— I didn’t think I was, like, your girlfriend or anything.”
“R-right,” he coughed, looking away and putting his hand on the back of his neck. “Yeah, that’s— that’s what I was gonna say. I knew you’d understand.”
You smiled, wishing you weren’t always so goddamn understanding. “But it was fun— a good way to kill time over the break, for sure.”
“Yeah,” he agreed alongside a thin laugh. “I… I think I’ll always owe you, for being my first time and all.”
“Well, you’ve certainly spent your first two weeks of not being a virgin pretty well,” you snorted. “I had a good time. We’ll call it even.”
“And… when I come back?” he pressed. “Maybe we can, I dunno… maybe we can do it again.”
You grinned and tilted your head. “Yeah, I like that idea.”
“But can I still call you?” he asked nervously.
“Of course!” you beamed. “You’ll have to tell me if you get any good books assigned this semester.”
“Yeah, I doubt it,” he scoffed, but his smile lifted just a bit.
“I can come see you off, if you want,” you offered, “but it might make your mom suspect something…”
“You’re probably right,” he admitted, “I wish you weren’t, but you are— but I’ll call first thing when I get there!”
You smiled, and he gave you a hug before he left; and he promised to call again, though you’d believed him the first time. And the next time you stayed up all night with Angus, it was on the phone— he snuck out of bed with a bag of quarters, and told you the phone was free so you wouldn’t feel bad, and talked to you about everything he could possibly think of.
Except, you didn’t quite make it all night: you fell asleep at some point, while he was talking about his English paper… not that he could blame you.
And for some reason, one that even he himself couldn’t quite explain, he kept feeding the phone quarters and listening to you sleep; he didn’t hang up until it was nearly morning and he had to sneak back into his room.
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THE STORM (PT. 2) — J.M
— summary: it’s been six months since that night at the chateau with jj, and he’s back for more.
— CW: mean!jj, maybe forced proximity??, slight breeding kink, slapping, choking, degrading, unprotected piv sex.
— note: i kinda came up with something for this, and have had it in my drafts for a minute.. i queued it up before i went on my break, hope y’all enjoy and i’ll be back soon! you can read part one here if you haven’t already!
It’s been six months since that night. The night that has consumed your every waking thought, and every nightmare you had.
You’d always known JJ hated you, so you don’t know why it really surprised you that things went down the way they did. JJ was a horrible person to put it nicely. Sure, you felt for him at times, his home life not being the best and all, but after that night, you stopped caring, you stopped trying, and you tried your hardest to ignore him.
But it’s hard to ignore someone who continually puts themself in your line of sight. You knew you’d still see him, seeing as the two of you are both in the same friend group, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t ignore his presence. The more you tried to ignore him though, the harder he tried to get your attention.
He’d throw mean jabs your way, shoulder check you as he walked past you, you’d catch him staring at you from across a room or when you and your friends are gathered around a late night fire his bright blue eyes stayed glued on you when no one else was paying attention.
This was one of those moments.
You and your friends decided to have a fire at the chateau, and the only thing you could focus on was the blonde whose blue eyes were burning a hole into the side of your face.
“So like I said, he’s a dick, and I hope our dad kicks him out soon.”
You blink once. Twice. Three times before finally putting your focus back on Sarah who had been talking to you.
“I’m so sorry, Sare. I’m just out of it tonight, what’d you say?”
Sarah places a loving hand on your shoulder before laughing. “It’s cool, just me complaining about Rafe, per usual. Are you okay?”
You slowly nod your head, letting your head hang and your eyes focus on the seltzer you had in your hands. Truth was, you were far from okay. Even after everything JJ has put you through — before and after you had sex with him — you couldn’t get him out of your head. You wanted to feel him again, you wanted to let him ravage you again, and you hated yourself for it.
“Yeah I’m good. Just tired, I think I’m gonna call it a night,” You pause, looking up and calling for John B. “You mind if I sleep in the spare room tonight?”
John B smiles back at you, nodding his head once. “Yeah that’s fine! Looks like you got the couch tonight, J.”
Your eyes flit over to JJ, his intense fiery gaze already on you. The corners of his lips lift into a small smile, but it looked evil. “Yeah, that’s cool.” He said lowly, responding to JB but his eyes never left yours.
Your entire body feels like it’s on fire despite the cold December air, and it wasn’t from the large fire blazing in front of you. No, it’s JJ and his all consuming presence that has your body feeling like it’s burning from the inside out.
You quickly drop your eyes, downing the last of your seltzer and crushing it in your hand. You tell your friends goodnight and head inside the old house, tossing the can into the trash and making your way down the small hallway and into the guest bedroom.
You hated the way JJ made you feel. You hated him. You hated how you still wanted him even after he used you and quite literally tossed you to the side when he was done with you.
His words have torn you apart the last six months. “We don’t talk about this, ever. got it? It was just.. hate sex? Someone had to fuck the attitude out of you. This changes nothing, you mean nothing to me, and i still hate you.”
You’re stripping yourself of your jeans and thick sweater, getting ready to climb into the bed when the unmistakable sound of the bedroom door squeaking open has you turning fast on your heels.
JJ.
“What.. What’re you doing in here?”
You hate the way your voice has a slight shake to it, the way you don’t sound confident and how your entire body is shaking in his presence. But most importantly, you hate the way your pussy is throbbing, growing wet at just the sight of JJ and his fucking stupidly beautiful face.
He smirks at you, reaching a hand behind him and locking the door. You take a cautious step backward, your eyes narrowing and head cocked slightly to the side as you watch him watch you.
“JJ! What the fuck are you-”
The rest of your sentence dies when JJ reaches you with just two long strides, his large, calloused hand wrapping around your throat and shoving you into the wall behind you.
“You’re driving me fucking insane. You know that? I fucking hate you, yet, I can’t get you out of my fucking head.”
Your eyes go wide, tears clouding your vision as you try and gasp for air. Your lips move, trying to choke out a response or anything, but all that comes out is strangled nonsense.
“I’ve tried! I’ve tried fucking other girls, I’ve tried staying away from you. But you’re fucking everywhere. Do you know how goddamn irritating that is? Why can’t you just go back to figure eight and stay there? Why the fuck do you keep comin’ around here?”
You lift your arms, gripping onto his wrist that holds your throat and clawing at it, begging him to release you. It’s not your fault he can’t stop thinking about you. You weren’t the one that came onto him that night, it was him! So why are you being blamed? Why is he making it so hard to breathe? So hard to… To..
Black dots take over your vision, your body going numb as JJ tightens his hand around your throat, squeezing so hard you’re close to blacking out.
JJ senses your body going slack in his hold and releases you, stepping back and watching as you hunch over, hands gripping your knees as you suck in breath after breath of sweet oxygen.
Once your head is not longer spinning and you’re breathing properly again, you slowly lift your body, your pissed off gaze finding JJ still standing there.
“Fuck you, JJ! I didn’t do shit! You came onto me that night! You told me that it changed nothing, so frankly, I don’t fucking feel sorry that you can’t get me out of your head, in fact, it brings me great pleasure to know I’m all you think about,” you pause, squeezing your eyes shut and sucking in a slow, long breath of air. “So if you don’t fucking mind, I’m exhausted and just want to be left the fuck alone!”
You move to climb into the bed, but JJ grips your upper arm tightly pulling you back and flush into his firm body. His head dips down, his lips ghosting over the shell of your ear and sending a shudder through your body.
His warm breath fans across your sensitive skin, and your nipples harden in response. Fuck him. You won’t give in easily this time.
“I think you want to fuck me again. I think, I’ve been in this pretty little head just as much as you’ve been in mine,” He pauses, his lips leaving a soft kiss on your temple. “Lay on the bed, Y/L/N. Now.”
You turn your head to look at JJ, your eyes narrowed into thin slits as you contemplate what to say. He’s not entirely wrong, but you’d be stupid to sleep with him again.
“Fuck. You. I refuse to let you fuck me again.”
JJ’s eyes darken, and the hand on your arm tightens more before he yanks you to the side and tosses you onto the bed. You lay there, chest heaving up and down as you watch him intently, waiting to see what he’d do next.
He stands there, staring at you, his own breathing erratic. Slowly, he pulls his tight white t-shirt over his head and tosses it to the floor. Your eyes scan the length of his tanned and toned chest. God, you want to feel him underneath your hands so badly, you want to give in and let him fuck you again. No one, and you mean no one, had ever fucked you the way JJ had.
“You look real pretty like this, in nothing but your bra and panties, actin’ like your pussy isn’t fuckin’ soaked f’me, crying f’me and just begging to be filled with my cock again.”
You open your mouth to speak, but JJ climbs on top of you, grabbing both your wrists in his right hand and pinning them above your head. You gasp loudly when you feel his cock pressing against your lace covered core, even through his jeans you can feel every last inch of him. Your pussy throbs, your arousal soaking your thighs as he lays there, unmoving but still the feel of his hard cock has you wanting to feel more of him.
“Tell me, princess. You wanna feel me inside you again? You wanna be fucked properly again? Because I know them kooks ain’t doing you no good. No, a girl like you needs to be dominated, needs to be choked and slapped and fucked nice and hard, needs to be put in her place, that what you want baby?”
You’re weak. You can’t even tell him no when your slick thighs, hard nipples and the way you’re breathing is giving the truth away. And the truth is, JJ is right. No one has compared to him. You want him to claim you, to break your mind and leave you craving more even when you know you shouldn’t.
“I- Please. Please fuck me.”
That’s all JJ needed to hear. He releases your wrists from his hand and yanks the cups of your bra down, exposing your tits to him. He smirks at the sight of your hard nipples, dipping his head down and licking each one before sucking one into his mouth.
He releases your nipple from his mouth with a pop, moving to the other and repeating his actions. “Fuck, such a filthy fucking slut, yeah? Loves the idea of fucking the one person she shouldn’t.”
You whimper in response, bucking your hips upward, craving any type of friction on your swollen, needy clit.
“Awww, how pathetic. Begging to be fucked already, don’t worry, baby, I’m gonna fuck this cunt, and I’m fucking it raw this time.”
JJ hops off the bed, popping the button of his jeans and sliding the zipper down with haste. You watch as he slides his jeans and boxers down his legs in one fell swoop, wasting no time in crawling back on top of you and claiming your lips with his.
You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down and further into you. You grind your hips against his, feeling his thick cock slide up and down through your slick folds. JJ groans in response, breaking the kiss and pushing himself up, supporting his weight with both his hands.
“So fuckin’ eager, aren’t ya? Wanna be fucked like the dirty little whore we both know you are.”
You nod your head fast, whimpering and moaning as you continue to grind your hips against the air. JJ laughs at you, his hand landing a harsh smack to your cheek before he grips his cock, stroking at it twice before sliding his swollen tip through your folds.
“P-Please, J! Please, fuck me! Wanna be fucked like a whore, wanna be your whore, the girl you hate but fuck anyways!”
JJ groans, the weight of your words hitting him hard. He looks down at you, eyes locked with yours as he pushes himself all the way inside you, filling and stretching your pussy. The two of you moan in unison.
“Fuck! So fuckin’ tight, feels so much better than I remember.” JJ rasps, his hips still, cock unmoving inside your pussy.
You begin grinding your hips, wanting to feel him move inside you, wanting his cock to bring you an orgasm.
JJ slaps at your face again, giving you a look of warning before he dips his head down and captures your lips with his again. He kisses you fervently and begins moving his hips, slowly at first, but then hard and fast.
You moan into his mouth when his swollen tip repeatedly hits at your g-spot, making your toes curl and fingers dig into the smooth skin of his back. “Fuckfuckfuck, JJ! Feels so fucking good!”
JJ picks up the pace of his thrusts, pounding himself inside you like it’s the last time he’ll ever do it, and you’re secretly praying it isn’t the last time. You need more of him forever, even if it’ll only ever be hate sex. It feels so fucking good, you can’t even think of another girl getting this from him.
“Yeah? Feels good? Want me to cum inside this pretty little pussy? Make you a mama and be stuck with me for the rest of your life?”
A loud moan escapes you at his words, and honestly, the thought isn’t too bad. You wouldn’t mind JJ knocking you up, you would always have a reason to see him, and maybe, just maybe, it would change the dynamic between the two of you.
You bite and suck on his lower lip as he continues his brutal thrusts, your pussy clenching around him with every push and pull of his cock. He slows his pace, slowly pulling out so only the tip remains inside you before harshly shoving himself back in. He continues to slowly pull himself out before shoving himself back in, his swollen head hitting that spot inside you over and over again until you’re so close to exploding you can taste it.
“J-JJ! Need.. Need to cum, please!”
Your teeth are chattering, legs shaking and belly tightening. You can’t hold off your orgasm, and thankfully, JJ doesn’t make you.
“Go on, make a mess on my cock, show me how much your pussy loves my cock being inside her.”
That was all it took, your orgasm gushes from you, soaking JJ’s cock and the sheets below you.
“JJ, oh God! Fuck!” You cry out, your nails digging into JJ’s back so hard you break skin.
JJ picks up the speed of his thrusts again, savagely fucking into your sensitive pussy, chasing his own high.
“Gonna cum inside this little cunt, claim you as mine, because you’re mine now, don’t wanna see you with anyone else, got it?”
You squeeze your eyes shut, moaning out a soft “yes”. JJ’s cock swells, twitching inside you as he comes undone, filling you with his cum like he said he would.
He thrusts inside you one final time, stilling and holding himself deep inside you, letting every last drop of cum fill you. Once he’s come down, he slowly pulls himself from inside you and places a kiss to your sweat slick forehead.
“Don’t know what else to say besides, you’re mine. I ain’t sayin’ I like you, or that I am gonna fall in love with you, but I don’t want no one else, and I don’t wanna see you with anyone else, got it?”
You slowly nod your head, your eyes fluttering shut as sleep tries to claim you. JJ quietly redresses, placing one final kiss to the top of your head before he makes his way out of the room. You drift to sleep, your mind consumed with what just happened, with JJ’s cum leaking from your pussy, and thoughts of what the fuck was to come from this little arrangement you just made with him.
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