#I’m so sorry to the new member
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Yayyyyyy!!! Hehe thank you for welcoming me to your family 🥰💞
I’m sorry for all the weird anons you’re getting, you don’t deserve that!!! Sending hugs <3
Also…can I be adopted? :D
Yeah the anons are weird I’m especially mad they went after a brand new member of tumblr
AND YES WELCOME TO THE FAMILY!
#also I noticed that#I’m so sorry to the new member#<333#I remember when I was a tumblr newbie (not too long ago)#and I would’ve been so stressed if all of that had happened to me!!!#be kind yall
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i am a little embarrassed to say i didn’t pay much attention to stage posse but still!!!!!:
stage ramuda is an entire menace lmao
like both the anime and stage’s takes on ramuda is a cutesy snarky young man who will tear everything and everyone down when provoked in a certain manner and it’s valid!!!!! doesn’t mean i particularly care for it tho lol
i love track 4 tho for showing off ramuda’s ability to manipulate and even tho he’s the antagonist of that play, he was provoked by jakurai so if you ask me, sensei was the true antagonist of that track and that’s the sort of writing that makes the stage so interesting lmao
there was a flavour of falseness sekoguchi-san’s ramuda had, like a deep seated mask over his emotions and interactions and it SLAPPED he played ramuda’s early self conflicts very well
i don’t listen to stage posse’s first songs at all anymore (i esp despise trap of fling gomen lol) but there was a time i’d listen to stage songs with yasui-san’s ramuda and get sad it didn’t hit the same as sekoguchi-san’s lol
now it’s not a problem lol yasui-san has a wonderful ramuda as well and it was an easy transition because i think sekoguchi-san and yasui-san have similar takes on ramuda
we don’t talk about stage gentaro’s first actor lol but he played a very fruity gencha and i always appreciate that lol
sakata-san’s gentaro i felt embraced more of gentaro’s weirdness which i like to see more of in my gentaro LOL
i always think about that final bop2023 encore talk where he pretended to cry bc everything was ending, but it was a just a big ol’ uso desu yo joke, much to his teammates chagrin lol. stage dice must have been still giving him a look or something because gentaro returned his gaze and did this half shrug with a 😌😏 expression that kills me tbh lmao
speaking of stage dice!!!!!!!!!!
*EXPLODES*
takizawa-san……………. takiryo…………….. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu……………………………..
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu……………………………
when ramuda got recast, it taught me the fear of my faves leaving and i begged that takiryo would never leave the role of dice lmao
his dancing??????????????? FLAWLESS
his rap?????????? FANTASTIC
his face???????? PHEW 😮💨
*collapses* and he’s charming too i always think about this one report i read where he and doshiro’s stage actor iirc were doing a rewatch of sorts of track two, and before it started they were playing asakusa bounce in the bg so takiryo was singing the chorus, ‘SEIYA!!!! SOIYA!!!!!! ASAKUSA!!!!!’
except he was getting the order wrong and kazuya-san had to gently correct him and takiryo fell out of his chair laughing at himself and UGH 😭💛😭💛😭💛😭💛😭💛😭💛
takiryo’s daisu absolutely put the ‘king’ in daisu lol like he was brutally cool
the way yasui-san and sakata-san tended to look towards him and occasionally acted around him like he was their leader helped drive that home too lol
stage dice was insane btw lmao i still can’t believe he said this lol
i think the stage play leaned into a young master kinda dice, to show what kind of upbringing dice came from in absence of the women’s presence in the plays. i think it’s a bit of a disservice to dice personally, but i wasn’t unwilling to see such a side of him explored lol
before fp vs mtc happened, he and byrnes-san tried to fit dice and rio’s relationship in wherever they happened to be together and i *clenches fist* thank them for that lmao
#vee queued to fill the void#i’m sorry it’s so transparent dice is my favourite posse member lmao#takiryo just got more pretty as the years went on and the stage visuals adjusted to suit their actors faces#so i do think the new dice looks more like dice tbh LOL#the new gentaro is VERY pretty!!!!!! and the new ramuda looks cute too!!!!!!!#i promise i’ll pay better attention to them this time around lmao
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sorry complete change of vibe but i think i need to take a little break i was just hit with devastating news and i definitely need time to process this
#📣 lumes announcements#☁️ lume speaks#i’m sorry for making this post rn if any of you are having a good day#or are in a good mood#i know i haven’t been as active with posts lately here but#i just want to be on break for a bit so i’m letting you all know in advance should i just stop posting/interacting all together#<- (on all accounts)#why did it have to happen again#and why now. the year just started#two people on the same day.#sorry my mood turned sour as soon as i heard of those said news#idk how i managed to take it in maturely but i really need to let out some steam#i really had to hear this before i go to sleep wth#ahghrf i don’t wnat to go through this cycle again#because i never cried in moments like these before as i was always the ‘strong one’ in the family#ughfbsbc but even so i want to cry since this is close to being the last straw#but at the same time i don’t want to bc i want to be the pillar for my family#nvm i almost threw up bc of everything that’d led up to this point#i haven’t been vulnerable like this for a long time but here we are#gonna have to reach out to family members to comfort and be with them for the time being#and i’ll be going to sleep. in tears i think#okay enough of that i’ll see you lovely people in a bit. just need some time for myself. thank you <3
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#my Mom keeps bringing up how our family dog doesn’t have a long way to go anymore#and like#where we’re gonna bury him and so in#and it just keeps wrecking me#like she wants me to be emotionally prepared but I’m not#I’ve already lost two very near family members over the past two years#and I love that stupid silly old dog#I just keep crying at random times because I can’t stop thinking and it hurts#why does grief never get any smaller#my life gets longer and my knowledge and experiences grow but the fucking grief stays static#it just appears in new forms. every time I think I’m ready to move on it takes a new form#I love that silly stupid old dog!!!! and I can’t handle losing him I can’t#I just need everyone I love to stay and not change and to stop the match of time#is that really too much to ask#sorry about this unhinged rambling I’m currently sobbing into a pillow#death mention tw#cecil blogs her life#pet death mention tw
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i think people should ask me about my insaneduo mermaid au (ask me to talk about my qsmp mermaid au)
#💬 one new message#it’s a general mermaid au with the qsmp members BUT i specify insaneduo because i adore them#i never know if i shiudl say insaneduo or 4bit? ik 4bit is the ship name but like…q! insaneduo are canonically married/divorced and that’s#how they are in my au so????? who knows#just ask me to talk about them please#if you read this far down i’ll let u in on a secret#slimeriana and philever are also in the au so u can ask for them if u want#i do indeed play favorites when i make aus i’m sorry#me and my friend made a whole like mermaid culture thing akncjbjan it’s fun we’re having fun#okay bye
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i hope sm stays on brand and does NOT follow through with their Q3/4/5/6/1278392&:&:$/« /$, schedule 😁
#mark and haechan….. tysm for your hard work and patience pls take care:(#i have so much to say im spreading them out through all social media platforms and dms lmaoo sorry if youve receive part of my ramblings#I’ve slept on it but something about sungchan and shotaros leave still feels off to me?!#i haven’t been actively keeping up as much and it still feels so sudden 😭#i feel so conflicted bc they definitely deserve better but also they’ve been included in all the pop up merch up til recently#and suddenly they decided to drop the news on a random Wednesday?! i hope their new groups treats them nicer but LOL#saw on twt someone say it seems like the members are finding out the same time as us lol yikes#also my friend was like ‘idk what’s happening but it’s l*cas’ fault’ and tbh mood shfjsj#there’s also the whole wayv situation didn’t xj say something about not renewing his contract hahahah and the solos/enlistments……….#I’m really excited for tolo but at what cost 😭#hate that the answer to all the why’s is simply bc $$$$ 😂🤣👹😅🥲
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anyway does anyone wanna see my islands
(once again my friend code is 1036730316DK in case ya wanna send me keys light my torches join the tribe wink wink nudge nudge)
#my singing monsters#sorry I. I’m still feeling Impatient about the Rare Wubbox and also some new members in the tribe would be nice#so far there’s only three ppl including myself#this isnt main tage worthy but. H#anyway#doodlez sings about monsters
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The nationalism in southern football games is unmatched (said while grimacing)
#sillyposting#it’s INSANE#this game is celebrating the armed forces and they present a new military member for everyone to stand up and salute every 5 min#and the marching band show was presenting all the different military branches#<- ALSO ITS THE S A M E EXACT SHOW I DID WHEN I WAS IN BAND?????#SAME EXACT SONGS AND DRILL???#I’ve played that SAME SOMG MEDLY EVERY YEAR SINCE HIGH SCHOOL#I told my parents if the band plays armed forces medley today I’m OUT#AND THEY DIDDDDDD#I CANT we bluffing but it’s still SO funny I called it#oh yeah and then they played a Toby Keith song about freedom and how or nation is under attack#this is so normal this is how normal counties act at sports games#/s btw#god there’s a lot of spelling mistakes sorry I can’t see in this sun#you get the point tho
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I really don’t understand this mindset that runs in film YouTubers’ people’s heads that the biggest problem with Stranger Things is that the writers refuse to kill off main characters???? my dude it’s not their inability to kill off characters that’s the problem it’s their affinity for introducing way too many characters to the cast in the first place and then not knowing what the fuck to do with them afterwards
#and killing off characters just because you have too many of them is such a cheap and lazy cop out#it’s exactly why basically everyone who’s even slightly a fan of the show isn’t happy about eddie’s death#and don’t get me wrong as sad as I’d be to see some characters die I’m not against it#if it serves the story better then it serves the story better I’ll get over myself#but as it stands I honestly just don’t think the story would be better with more death in it#I can think of maybe one or two characters MAYBE and that’s about it#so either a) stop introducing new members to the cast or#b) after it’s too late and you’ve already introduced them GIVE THEM SOMETHING INTERESTING TO DO THAT FITS THEIR ARC#you can even send them away from Hawkins to have a small arc offscreen if you want to get rid of them idc#like we could’ve had that with the California gang in S4 but no#apparently not#(btw this is referencing like … technical writing problems not social problems with stuff like the racism in the show)#(that’s a whole other can of worms we can’t open because if I start I won’t stop and I’m afraid I’ll get violent)#stranger things#the duffer brothers#the duffers are bad writers#lol sorry
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man ive been gone for a hot sec haven’t i
#guess what life really just fucking happened for the last couple of weeks#I was ill and then bad news and then family drama plus building work and a huge house sort out#and every single member of my family is pressed in some way and I’m the one that holds them all together the fucking mood maker of the house#which means I just end up abandoning all the shit I should be doing which then decides to creep up and panic me at 1am ie now#anyway sorry for the rant I just didn’t know how to get back on here which sounds weird#but like no shows have been grabbing me I’ve just been rewatching shit and not really having a lot of thoughts like the brain aint braining#the rant river has run dry but hey there are some things I’m looking forward to soon so hopefully I get my spark back
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gawd having to act straight at michaels is crazy bc so many of my coworkers just talk about the guys theyre dating and or fucking and its crayzay so my one manager showed me a pic of the guy shes just fwb with right now and she was like hes sooo hot and i was like meh i mean not my type i guess like not ugly but whatevs and she was like well what is your type and i was like OH NO i shouldnt have worded it that way so i said oh i dont really know i just know it when i see it i guess. and she was like well cant you list like traits characteristics and i was like. Well. i must say this. i know its controversial but i do like mustaches. and she was like. that is very controversial
#IM SORRY I JUST LIKE MUSTACHES i think they rule#when someone has an epic mustache i do have to be impressed#brot posts#im sooo sick of being at work. honestly this has happened at my new job once now already too#so im so sick of being at work in general. and having girls talk about nothing but boys they find cute#i csn only hum along in feigned interest so many times im going insane#my new job is very lgbt friendly like we have multiple trans staff members and i noticed one whos training me actually has an ace ring#so like im not alone unlike at michaels where like. Everyone is cishet.#i had one gay coworker but he QUIT !!!!! for good reason but still i miss him :(#anyway so my point is like my new job is definitely like a good rnvironment#and like all my michaels coworkers are respectuful too its just yknow i’m obviously an outlier which creates a different dynamic#but just regardless i just like do not want to come out at work??? at any place of employment ??#maybe if we’re friends outside of work and we’re talking about these things outside of work then maybe#but like literally being clocked in on the premises. boss floating around. just. its weird. im not telling you about such a deeply personal#part of myself !!!!!#so having thsse people talk about being straight constantly its like please youre putting me in such an awkward position#having to act along with it for my LIFE because i do not want to explain that im not attracted to men while im at my JOB !!!!#i can only evade so much !!!
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ok but.. six of crows golden wind au 👀
#mostly bc mista reminds me of Jesper so much lol#so mista as sharpshooter ofc#And Bruno obv is the gang leader/thief w a traumatic past#I think abba would be a great heartrender#giorno fits as the new member the way wylan was#tho I’m not sure if he’d be the demolitions expert#and narancia would fit wylan’s role as well bc he’s illiterate#and i also think he’d be a neat demolitions expert#but narancia also gives me good wraith/spy vibes like inej so idk#also in the soc promo Matthias is described as a convict#and I guess fugo could fit under that#or maybe abba being the convict and fugo as the heartrender 🤔#Hm much to think abt#yes this is just me wanting to write a heist au what about it#sorry i just need to see them steal from a casino so badly#aaaaand now Im thinking abt Bruno with slicked back hair… 😳#kinda wanna draw this whole au now..#blahblahbills#jojo posting
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Ew eww why does windows 11 come with pre-installed baby mode that stops you from downloading a browser
It doesn’t even tell you what is stopping you from installing it. I had to look it up. Its called s mode.
No one wants to use edge and bing. Get over it.
#I get that this is baby mode to stop people from installing epic toolbars but. EWWW#the good news: I don’t need to buy a laptop (for now) cause I’m ‘borrowing’ it#aka random family member bought a laptop and doesn’t even use it#the bad: it has windows 11. this is so ugly.#10 was perfect what is this..#I fear for the day that 11 fully replaces 10 I don’t want this#why is everything in the middle of the screen. what did they do to the windows menu.#it took me a few seconds to even notice the power button. awful. awful.#I should note that this is the most generic ass HP laptop ever but it has A TOUCHSCREEN? it’s not even one of those foldable ones#it’s a regular ass laptop with a touchscreen. also no backlit keys (cringe)#sorry I’m whining#I shouldn’t complain this thing is brand new and clean#though I did have to taint it by installing chrome at the owners request
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i’m watching the last few episodes before glee goes full new york and marley is gone forever and melissa has not been featured ONCE in the last four episodes i want to chew my arm off
#katie watches glee#i’m so sorry but i don’t give a single fuck about the graduated new direction members#i will never understand how they could make such a huge deal about bringing in mel#and then basically never using her#you’re telling me she doesn’t even get a featured riff or anything in FOUR ENTIRE EPISODES#pls she is so undervalued#she got like three scenes about wanting to quit glee and that’s it#anyway can you tell why i’m watching this show
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Make It Stick
Pairing: Old!Joel x Reader
Summary: Joel never thought he’d need a vasectomy. Then, one night, he accidentally finishes inside you.
Warnings: 18+. Unprotected-peepaw-p-in-v (I’m sorry). Accidental creampie. Age gap. Cumplay. Breeding kink. Ovulation has led me places I wouldn’t go with a gun.
Note: Convergence is a painting by Jackson Pollock. We studied it in high school and I thought it looked like jizz idk
Word count: 4.7k
He should’ve gotten snipped when he had the chance.
Should’ve taken the plunge, faced his fears of needles and fluorescent-washed doctor’s offices like any man his age could have done and gotten the damn vasectomy. Now he was here, nearly two decades older and still none the wiser in this cold, dead world with a pretty young thing like you between his sheets. In lieu of elective surgery, Joel Miller had only to grit his teeth, bite hard, and repeat over and over again in his head, desperate:
‘Don’t cum, don’t cum, don’t cum, don’t cum, DON’T—’
Words like those normally worked. With women that weren’t you, they tended to serve him exceedingly well.
But you were just so tight. And wet. And welcoming. And try as Joel might to pretend like he got laid on a regular basis, the truth was that he didn’t. Wouldn’t. Couldn’t seem to think straight when it came to this fixation he’d developed for you, so, instead, he let his dick do all the decision-making whenever he found himself around you. Ten times out of ten that ended in:
“J-J-Joel—oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck—I’m gonna CUM.”
And that made it worth every last life-endangering drop.
Feeling how your flushed, lithe body came apart beneath his touch. How you needed him. How your eyes grew to half the size of your face and you gaped up at the man, lips parted, like you couldn’t even comprehend how the friction of seven inches could make you feel so good.
If he had it his way, he would’ve loved nothing more than to show you that feeling every night, and twice the next morning if his hip wasn’t giving him too much trouble.
But, at present, the man had bigger fish to fry. Like not becoming a new father at fifty-nine if he could help it.
With the last two fluttering pulses of your heat, and almost going cross-eyed from the pleasure as he felt it, Joel yanked his big, slippery cock out of your body and made a fist around his member as he always knew to do. Tugged and pulled and grunted above you—‘Sweet girl, you’re so fuckin’ good to me’—and watched your tits and your belly for the milky white ropes to ensue.
Strangely, though, your skin stayed the same.
No cum-spray Convergence appeared before him, no opaque and cloudy fluids dribbling down your ribs, nothing. Your stomach was as bare as the rest of you, save for a few beads of sweat, and that was all there was.
Joel shook his dick harder, confused. Beneath him, you were still coming down from your high smiling ear-to-ear and staring blissfully at the ceiling. Your chest rose and fell, rose and fell in quick succession, and while you endeavored to recollect your mind, Joel was losing his.
Where the FUCK was his cum?
In no naked horizontal tango to date had Joel simply…cum without noticing. Shit like that just didn’t happen to men, least of all to ones his age, so when he’d wrung his poor cock like a sodden towel and still saw nothing come out, he felt his stomach turn and plummet inside him.
He dropped to his hands and knees in less than a moment and lowered his head between your legs.
“No, Joel!” you squealed, giggling. Kicking your feet, “Another round and I’m gonna combust, you old perv!”
But Joel wasn’t looking to get his dick wet again. He was inspecting you. Or trying to, anyway. Quickly realizing he couldn’t see a thing in the darkness, he let out a breath through his nose and lifted you off the bed. Your naked frame thrown over his shoulder, bare hip beside his head and your strangled, muffled cry of, ‘What the hell, Joel?!’ hardly seemed to register with the man carrying you off.
You were toted to the bathroom. Joel was about to ease you down on your feet. Then, appearing to change his mind at the last second, he set you onto the sink instead. Your skin bristled with indignation, anger. A little arousal.
“Last time we did it on a sink we broke the faucet,” you reminded him, feigning more dismay than you really felt inside. If anything, you liked it when your fossil-age fuckbuddy switched things up. You were just exhausted.
Heedless of your words, Joel kneeled on the floor and pried your legs apart before him. When you swatted at his silver-flecked head, he brushed your hand away.
“Hold still,” he grunted.
“How come?”
“‘Cause I said.”
How quickly he commanded that tone of a father.
“Wanna sleep,” you groaned, about to roll your eyes.
But you couldn’t deny you liked being doted on by him.
Joel’s touch was gentle. Probing. Spidering down the most sensitive parts of your bare lower half, between your thighs, and slowly coaxing you closer to the edge of the sink. Your breath hitched when you saw his head tilt.
He appeared to be deep in thought—a rare sight for anyone who’d seen Joel Miller in the postcoital state. Most every time he’d blown his load before, the man was dead asleep within ten minutes. His joints could barely hold himself upright after a half hour of plowing the back forty, much less carry you, too, so you were puzzled now.
He thumbed at the seam of your cunt, and you whined:
“Jo-el—”
“Can ya…push, baby?” His eyes flitted up quickly.
“Push?”
“Yeah, just…” With a look you couldn’t quite read, he placed the palm of his other hand on your belly. Then, pressing, “Like this. Like you’re squeezin’ somethin’ out.”
You cocked a brow in muted confusion but did as he asked. You watched his gaze, and it stayed on you.
Or, rather, on that soft and pliant spot between your legs the old man seemed to favor so much. On any other occasion, in a position like this, he surely would’ve been wearing a smile. Tonight, his lips curled into a grimace.
And twisted even further when you ‘pushed’ like you did.
At first you felt nothing. A gentle clench of your walls supplied little more than a sense of having been stretched—no novel concept to you, who’d spent the last three-and-a-half months or so getting fucked by the finest AARP affiliate alive most every night. It wasn’t until you clamped down again that you got the feeling there was something else. Something thick and warm and slow as molasses trickling out from between your folds.
You let out a low, tender, ‘Mmph’ without meaning to; it felt kind of nice. Beneath you, Joel’s face turned grave.
He watched as his spend oozed out of your freshly-fucked hole and thought of vasectomies again.
You were young—too young to know better. Too sweet and naïve to see any peril in spreading your legs for a man like him, in a world like this. And Joel swore he’d be careful. But no post-apocalyptic birth control method was perfect, or even close to it, and it was clear he’d relied too heavily on reflexes to keep him from cumming inside you. Joel was old—too old to be doing this shit.
Too grown and well-versed in sex to be making mistakes as stupid as that. His brow pinched in, and he drew his next breath as if the air around him was growing scarce.
“Joel, what’s—”
“When’s the last time you— you— uh…bled?”
Hardly more in control of his face than the rate his heart went thudding in his chest, Joel winced at the end. This time, you were the one to knit your eyebrows together. You could tell by that tight, discomfited tone he wasn’t talking papercuts, but were still unsure of his purpose.
“Like two, two and a half weeks ago. Why?”
Well, fuck.
Joel buried his face in his hands. You scooted closer to the sink’s edge, thinking little of his cum leaking out.
“Why?” you tried again. Softer this time.
An old, weathered head lifted to greet you. It was bleak.
“You see this?” Joel paused. Swiping his finger through the viscous white substance that had trickled out on the counter, in a puddle now, “Y’know what it means, right?”
You let his look, and the question, remain suspended in air for a second. Then another. Then you shrugged.
“Yeah. But…you’re old,” came your answer at length.
You’re old.
Joel and you both knew as much, but the former wasn’t quite following your train of thought. Still wanting to try and mitigate damages while he could, though, Joel reached for the roll of toilet paper that was fastened to the wall and tore himself a strip. He bunched it up and, reaching for one of your knees to spread you further for him, took to daubing the tissue across your entrance.
“What’s me bein’ old got to do with anything?” A little sharp, then, seeing you flinch when he drew too close to your clit, “‘m sorry, baby, just— gotta get this out of you.”
You made a face but let him continue anyway. Your eyes followed each movement of his hand, and reflexively, the muscles in your thighs tightened. Why bother with this when the man has so many better uses for his hands?
For a second, your eyes fluttered half-shut.
“Maria says old folks are, uh…infertile. Got something to do with a middle pause,” you said, breaths labored.
Joel stopped just long enough to shoot you a look.
“Menopause,” he corrected, all too matter-of-fact, before returning to his work, “is a woman thing.”
What the hell were they teaching in Jackson’s sex ed classes, anyway? Then Joel remembered how his brother sincerely believed that women peed out of their vaginas until he was twenty-three, and the thought of you not knowing the ins and outs of male virility wasn’t the most far-fetched idea in the universe. Besides, sexual health wasn’t exactly the community’s highest priority when the world around it was in a perpetual state of decay and hordes of fungus-faced fuckers ran rampant in the wild.
He curved a tender, careful finger against the ring of muscles framing your sex, trying to absorb more cum, and your grip on the edge of the countertop tightened.
“S-So, you—” You swallowed, throat constricting a little too, “You’re sayin’…men can make babies…whenever?”
You sounded so innocent as you said it. Joel wanted nothing more than to club himself over the head for being the cause of this predicament—of being such an instrumental part of the perceived corruption, as it was.
Meanwhile, your head was swimming in filthier thoughts.
Deeper, Joel, keep…pushing in…dee-e-per. You would have scarcely had more luck giving a fuck what Joel was talking about now than if he’d just said the room was on fire. By his voice, you knew you should’ve been paying attention, but the dexterity of his fingers was too much. He was caressing the first couple inches of your inner walls, attempting to scrape what bits of his release he could get unstuck from the flesh, but it seemed he was succeeding mostly in just turning you on. Rendering you deaf to the drone of his words as you pictured him pushing something else inside your tight, throbbing—
“—whole lotta problems for us if you’re, uh…ovulating,” Joel finished, expression taut and oblivious. You hadn’t heard the first part of that sentence and didn’t care to.
“Ovulating,” you repeated slowly. Indifferent.
Joel carried on without a hitch.
“Kids just ain’t fit for this world. I know you know that.”
You nodded along, not hearing a word.
“And if you’re— if y’ever did consider, maybe…”
Your lungs took an extra sharp inhale when Joel’s fingers coaxed out a warm, sticky glob of his load, and he petted your folds with his thumb. Then let out a breath himself.
“…y’oughta start a family with someone your own age—”
That part snagged your attention. Too swiftly, it came:
“My own age?”
Sighing, in spite of those welts of pleasure so heightened by his touch that the space between your legs began to throb and ache. Hardly possessed of more sense to form words that weren’t just echoes of his own, you tried communication from a simpler source—your foot.
You nudged his shoulder, and Joel looked up.
“What?”
“What?”
Parroting was, evidently, a hard habit to kill. Your toes curled into the bare skin of Joel’s shoulder, and when he re-inserted his finger, you ground your heel even deeper.
“When’s that ev…ever stopped us from doing it before, hm?” you said, tone strained but laced with some humor too, “Thought you liked sayin’ you’d make me a mama.”
Joel’s face flooded pink at the recollection—as a matter of fact, there had been several such memories. Instead of answering immediately, he just averted his gaze again. He anchored one hand to your thigh, and with the other teased out another string of your shared arousal before wiping his finger on the tissue, clinically, and repeating. All he had to offer in reply after was: ‘That’s different.’
And it was, to some extent. Joel wasn’t blind to the sea of uneasy looks that trailed behind you both whenever you walked the streets of Jackson together. How wide the eyes would get when instead of observing some filial display of affection play out before them, as expected, you’d loop your arms around his waist and take his lip between your teeth as you kissed—‘Can we please go home now, baby?’—that Joel was certain he’d been cemented as the resident pervert among everyone in town. Just how much worse that reputation was liable to get if there ever happened to be a round and swollen belly between that embrace someday was unthinkable. Dirty talk was one thing; parenthood another entirely.
This is for the best, became the low, grating refrain in his skull. Why he dug so hard, pushed so far inside the wet, velvety interior of your body without a thought for his own desires in that moment; he had to cull every trace of himself out of there, before he had half a chance to think.
“Baby, hey, hey, no—” Joel cut in a second later, abrupt.
No, no, no. You weren’t thinking either. Wrapping your hand around his wrist, pushing his fingers deeper inside.
Smiling a little, too.
“What are you— no, honey, don’t— you can’t,” Joel’s words splintered in every direction, watching you plunge his own index and middle fingers into the slick and the warmth he’d just been trying to get his cum out of. He looked up and saw your lids were heavy, about to close.
“What are you doin’? This ain’t…no, baby, it ain’t…safe.”
Back to sounding like a dad in no time at all.
“What’s wrong with leaving it in a bit longer? Feels nice.”
You had no idea what you were talking about. Joel pulled back on his hand and, in less than a second, had it freed.
“I just told you,” he huffed, “You’re too young—”
“I’m plenty old, Joel,” you returned, eyes snapping open, “You’ve shown me that more times than I can count.”
Joel was silent, stunned. He rose to his feet as your eyes seared holes into his, and for a second, he was uncertain whether to take a step back or reach out for you again.
“Baby…”
To his surprise, something like hurt surfaced behind your eyes. You set your lips in a tighter line, and your grip on the counter grew firmer just the same. He would’ve taken that move as his cue to lean in gently, slot his body between your thighs, and venture an apology of some sort, when the next thing you did stopped him cold.
Without a word, you slipped your free hand between your legs—eyeing Joel closely, almost scornfully, as you did.
You took your middle and ring fingers and sank them into your cunt. Not intending to let a drop of his spend leak out, you wedged them in as far as they’d go. Joel watched. Gawked. Once sufficiently pleased with the look of shock taking over his handsome, aged features, you withdrew the fingers. You brought them up to your mouth, wrapped your lips around the tips, and sucked.
It was a rare thing to get a taste of you and Joel together like this, so you savored it. You moved your mouth further down to drink it all in, peering up with wide, indulgent eyes and a look that was meant to punish.
Feels nice.
Tastes alright, too.
You’d licked the last bit of this glaze off your hand when your stomach clenched. You knew it would happen. Full as you were, you feared your body still hungered for more. As such, it hardly came as a surprise when next your muscles tensed, and you shifted closer to Joel.
“Maybe I don’t want babies with someone my own age.”
Either one of your knees were nudging his hips. Drawing him in. Joel appeared to waver for a second, unsure, but the look on his face made it clear this was mostly a matter of a delayed reaction. He couldn’t get his legs to move because the rest of him was still in awe. Staring at your lips, where the residue of his spend was glistening, then to your eyes, which were no less inviting, then up to the crown of your head and over it, to fix his stare on the mirror behind it. You watched him watch his own reflection with a look that was both hard and unkind, breathing slow. When he didn’t stir from that position after a minute, you touched a hand to his lower stomach.
And, brushing the heel of your palm against what felt like a hundred grey hairs in the old man’s happy trail—your favorite ones—you smoothed a caress along his belly, back and forth, before moving it left. Your hand came to rest on a mound of muscle and fat sitting right above his hip. Love handles, Joel had remarked one morning with vague distaste. Love handles, you’d repeated, beaming. You held on tightly now, appreciatively, and used your well-loved wall of flesh to pull him closer. As with any beckoning of yours, Joel didn’t have so much as half a mind to resist. He did, however, refuse to meet your gaze while you tilted your hips and spread your legs wider, before winding your ankles around the backs of his legs.
“Don’t you think I’d look pretty?” You pouted up at him. Your folds made a light, warm suction rubbing along the front of Joel’s cock—of course he’d grown hard again, and you could hold him, point him down to that wet embrace awaiting him patiently at the edge of the sink.
Joel cursed under his breath.
“‘Course I do…” he said, voice hoarse, “Y’always look—”
“I mean…with your baby inside me, Joel. Right here.”
As if to put a finer point on your words, you nestled the head of his cock inside the first inch of your body. Joel had to seize the laminate underneath you and grit his teeth to keep from letting out a groan too loud. That tip may as well have been a first-rate conductor of heat, and your warmth the thing that might send him spilling again
“You don’t—” Joel choked out, nearly incensed, “—don’t know what the hell you’re sayin’, baby. What that means.”
In truth, there wasn’t a world Joel Miller could imagine where a girl like you could give more than a passing thought to getting knocked up by him—a man his age. What good would it do? You had your whole life laid out before you like a four-course dinner spread; there was no sense whatsoever in letting the meal go to waste on him.
He communicated as much by moving to pull out.
You met the effort with a push of your own, sinking down another inch or two on his shaft and smiling when you saw his eyes roll back in his head at the dizzying friction.
“I know more than enough, old man—” Grin stretching ear-to-ear as you dug your heels in his ass and tugged him deeper, “—who do you think taught me all this?”
Of course, it had been Joel.
Always, always him—the only one, in fact.
Your walls drew him in like a hug. For once, Joel conjured up the strength to take a look between your lower half and his, and when he did, the next moan was inevitable. It trickled through his lips. Your body looked sublime swallowing a third of his cock, and it was almost as though a maggot had crawled into his brain, chanting:
‘Make her full. Make her yours. Tell any man who’d even think of looking her way she belongs to someone else.’
He couldn’t.
Joel would never be so selfish. Just think of her youth.
But when his gaze drifted back to yours, every thought and any word besides seemed gently to melt away. Beneath him, your eyes were two pools of desire.
“You like this…don’t you, Joel?” Your voice was tiny.
“I do.”
In fact, he loved it.
“Then why can’t we?” Why shouldn’t we?
Minuscule now, the words that reached him barely exceeded a whisper. It was as though the moment itself had drained all fear from your face—and out of Joel, all common sense from his brain—leaving you both to stare at the other with shared, stupid, anoetic looks of bliss. The man who had you beat by thirty-odd years seemed nearly of the same mind, with almost identical ignorance.
Idiocy.
“Just once?” Joel croaked.
Somewhere underneath, unseen, you smiled.
“Just one?” you murmured back.
He sank in another inch. When your walls contracted around him, Joel’s hands found your hips by force of habit and pushed your back against the glass behind it. The mirror was cool, and inside you, Joel was throbbing.
“Once,” he repeated, not thinking too deeply.
“One,” you said, with a world of more purpose.
Joel relinquished the last three inches, and with it, all of his resolve. The handsome, scarred, and plainly greying features all twisted as one, and the expression that you knew too well to mean that the man was feeling good took on the slightest hint of guilt. He gripped you tighter.
“One?” Joel panted. Confused.
He pulled out halfway just to find his home again. Your pearly slick mixed together with his spend, and both coated over Joel’s shaft in a pretty, generous sheen.
“One more of you, I mean.” You sounded too sweet. There was no way in hell you’d actually meant it.
Joel’s cheeks flushed again, but he didn’t stop, either.
“Baby…” he trailed off instead. He pushed in, pulled out, felt your tender little hole make an ‘o’ around his shaft, and then he kissed the edge of your left cheek—maybe to rein in the need in his words before he spoke again: “One’a me takes and I’m givin’ ya fifteen more, y’hear?”
The smile he received told him as much as he needed to hear. He probably wouldn’t have believed it even if you’d said the words yourself. Joel’s thrusts sped up, and as the pleasure distended in the pit of his stomach with the friction and the feel, his words flowed a little more freely.
In disbelief, “Wanna be a mama that bad for me, huh?”
Your grin grew bigger. You nodded your head.
“Make your old man a daddy, is that it?”
Exactly. Senseless as it was, your look said it all.
To have slipped between the grooves and ridges of Joel’s brain and caught wind of even a fraction of the things he wanted to do to you then, a smarter girl would have run. Would have shoved him back out as swiftly as she’d let him in and told him no, that’s gross, and gone home. And, had the grey matter floating inside your own skull not been so completely dominated by primal need and wanting, that’s likely what you would have done, too. Instead, with a head full of lewd, youthful stupidity, you seized the black-grey curls dangling at the nape of his neck and drew him closer. You spread your legs wider.
“That is what you’ve wanted this whole time, right?”
Under his scruff, a muscle tensed as Joel bit down.
That’s all he’s ever wanted.
Let the neighbors talk.
Let them say what they wanted to say—it was probably all true to the point they were trying to make, anyway. That Joel was a pervert, of course. That you were naïve, also true. That you would look too good not to stare in a white cotton frock with a bump underneath, absolutely. These were the ideas permeating your brain and his while Joel took a firmer hold of your sides and brought his nose to rest against yours. With every stab of his hips, he pressed kisses to your soft, parted lips, speaking low:
“That what you want, too, darlin’?” More serious now.
The head of his cock nicked a sensitive ridge inside you, eliciting a whimper, but you nodded. You nodded again, feeling the brush of his stubble at your mouth and your chin, and nodded again when he bottomed out, stuffing you tight. It felt a little more momentous than any other time in the past, now that you were picturing a fullness that wasn’t just him. Him and you: a concrete being to soothe the sting of his absence long after Joel withdrew.
Something to stick.
“Please say it, baby.”
Someone to call yours.
“I want it,” you said, sounding desperate.
A coil was just starting to form in the place you felt him. Drifting up, pulling tight, making your eyes go glossy and wide while they stuck to Joel’s and begged him for more.
“Want what?” He sped up, and his thrusts got sloppy.
“Want you,” you breathed, “Inside me, Joel, please.”
As if predicting your next thoughts, the man lowered his hand to your belly. You hadn’t even noticed the smallest bulge had taken shape beneath the skin. Joel slowed, momentarily, then rubbed the base of his palm against the mound where your body was obliged to make room for his cock inside you. He drew soft, tender circles there and, with the motion, sent stars flying before your eyes.
“Good girl,” he murmured, “Right here?”
“Ri— right there. Right there.”
Joel adored that sound. The soft, elated look, the gentle knoll of flesh in a bump below his hand, the whimpers rolling off your tongue repeatedly, quicker and quicker the more the pleasure inside you continued to build. Joel’s release was coming soon, too. For the hundredth time that night, he silently wished he were a little younger; so he could fill you up once, twice, twenty more times until your insides were stuffed and painted white. As if reading his mind, as he had for you, you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.
“Hope our baby has your eyes,” you murmured to him.
It shouldn’t have had such a strong effect—but of course, it did. Joel pictured the small, sweet infant with irises that shone a bit like his, and his stomach caved in.
Tonight, tomorrow, or ten months down the line, he was getting you pregnant. He’d clear his whole schedule for it
“That right?” And now he couldn’t stop the smile as he spoke, leaning even further in, “What about their nose?”
He kissed the tip of yours.
“Hope they get this.”
He kissed either one of your cheeks.
“These too.”
You had to fight back a laugh while his scruff tickled skin. Two deep strokes away from the brink of release and he still somehow always stayed in tune with your needs.
The threat of your peak was perilously near. Joel’s spend and your slick, tender glaze made a chorus of sounds at each thrust, and the deeper he went, the bigger it swelled. Your smiles couldn’t stay for much longer when the feeling inside you both was being amplified like that. Sensing this, Joel took hold of your face and slipped his touch to cup your chin. He made you tilt your head up to him, as if to ask again, ‘Are you sure?’ and when you nodded, his lips twitched again. A fleeting hint of a grin, like he couldn’t be more eager to finish now if he tried.
Holding your face, cock swollen and throbbing and desperate between your walls, he felt a familiar twitch.
There it is.
#IN CONCLUSION……….WE MAKIN BABIES#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller imagine#joel miller one shot#joel miller#joel miller tlou#joel miller fic#joel miller fanfiction#joel tlou#the last of us fic
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i have sooooo many thoughts about the relationship the system has w/ freddy and everything he does and how they deal with it someday i’ll write about it
#im thinking of making the system a name#i think it has a specific term for that kind of name but i can’t rmbr right now#a catchall?#i don’t think that’s it#anyways i’m also thinking of new names for everyone#i want fred to have a none spanish name bc his source is supposed to be a cartoon that was dubbed with spain spanish#and freddy i want him to have the most regular ass name ever but i don’t want it to be ugly#🌙.txt#i don’t think i’ve mentioned it but the system are 5 members maybe? and they have a gatekeeper#i don’t particularly like assigning roles to each head#mate so they have vague and multiple roles#i like thinking about the system a lot so i’ve done research about it but if i ever say something wrong im sorry!!
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