#I’m pretty sure I’m not autistic. but I am something.

[sugarcoatednightshade]

My sister getting diagnosed with autism is literally the funniest thing to ever happen in my family because the more I learn about it the more I realize that the whole damn family is autistic.

Without getting too much into it, my dad and his mom and his brother and their cousins and really the majority of his family are almost certainly undiagnosed autistic or some other similar disorder(s). Which doesnt change anything or even feel like a revelation tbh.

But what makes this so fucking funny is that, for years, my sister has been convinced that there’s something wrong with my mom. Every week she comes and tells me about a different tiktok diagnoses that explains why our mom is so fucking weird.

And it turns out that the reason my siblings and I have spent our whole lives side-eying our mom is because she is the only neurotypical in a family of quirked up little freaks.

[thirsty-4-ghouls]

So I got into a whole thing about weather or not pecharunt’s mochi are vegan (it wasn’t an argument) and, uh… I decided that this was better off here than as a YouTube comment.

I’m about to ramble about some really weird philosophical questions now, weird because it’s about Pokémon.

“It does raise an interesting question though. These mochi would be an animal product, which is what veganism tries to exclude, HOWEVER, the reason they exclude animal products is because animal cannot give consent to humans using them. This Pokémon offering the mochi it has made itself with its own poison secretions mixed in, even with the ulterior motive, is from a consenting animal and is thus vegan. Humans though, are also animals, and taking advantage of them would be breaking an animal’s consent, unless the person taking it was fully aware of possible consequences and made the decision outside of the manipulation of the Pokémon. Then it would not be a violation of consent. A human consuming a drink that was drugged without their knowledge is technically not vegan? but in a very convoluted way, and the non-vegan part of it doesn’t apply to the victim because it’s the perpetrator who has broken consent. This is similar to pecharunt’s actions. Vegans, for the most part, understand that animals do not function with the same understanding of consent, and that is part of why they avoid breaking any consent of others, it’s because humans are capable of understanding it and affording it to others. Removing a tapeworm would not be non-vegan though because the entire philosophy is about going as far as is possible and practicable, meaning that you are able to defend yourself. Since animals are exempt from following this philosophy because they don’t have the same understanding of consent and do not have a choice when it comes to what they consume, are Pokémon exempt from this as well? Pokémon seem to have a better understanding and communication of and with humans than real life animals, so do the rules now apply? If the Pokémon isn’t vegan this leaves only the hypothetical vegan human, making the question about only one half of this scenario, but what if the Pokémon considered the philosophy as well? The pokemon's philosophy and actions would not impact the human side of things in this question though.”

ultimately, coming back to this after several days (I forgot about this post and then saw it again and started thinking about the question once more) I think that, from the human side of things, the answer is "Probably? The Pokémon is the one offering and Pokémon do usually seem to have a similar intelligence level to the in game humans, so their consent is comparable to a human's, assuming the Pokémon is a smart one." from the Pokémon side of this, "Usually, no" since the Pokémon is drugging someone and thus they cannot give informed consent to anything. <- that paragraph was an update

That is what was said by myself. I don’t actually remember where I was going with this. It was originally just going to be a hypothetical about weather or not the mochi would be vegan but now I’m wondering if Pokémon could understand the philosophy and choose to be vegan. This is not something that is possible in this world, but in that one… not only that but humans in that universe are technically Pokémon, if I remember correctly. So humans being vegan would mean that some Pokémon already are. This is comparable to humans being an animal though, in my opinion.

The fact that my phone keeps changing it to weather and I don’t actually remember the correct spelling is pissing me off because I’m almost certain it’s spelled differently and is a different word >:(

[endless-weightless]

Ford Pines x GN!reader headcanons!

I'm surprised it took me this long to get into Gravity Falls. Anyways this has both SFW and NSFW so beware. There's also a brief mention of being AFAB as a possibility but other than that it's completely gender neutral (I'm 99% sure, I didn't proofread too well lol).

SFW

Right off the bat, I’m saying he’s autistic because so am I and I said so.

If you’re someone who needs reassurance or is generally anxious/paranoid about anything he’ll go into long (often scientific) explanations to ease your mind and also throw in some fun facts.

Both a listener and a yapper. He loves nothing more than the sound of your voice but also loves being able to spout all sorts of things about his research and interests while you stare at him lovingly.

Can’t sleep unless you’re next to him. You don’t even need to be cuddling, your presence is just the one thing he needs to fall asleep.

That being said, he will NEVER pass up an opportunity to cuddle. Watching a movie? Cuddling. Working at his desk in the lab? Cuddling on his lap. Cooking something in the kitchen? He’s got his arms wrapped around you as he presses loving kisses into your temple.

He rarely swears, but when he does it always makes you do a double-take (and maybe giggle because it sounds so odd coming from him).

Probably tried weed once or twice in the '70s and was somewhat part of the psychedelic rock scene. Stan has some old photos of him during that time somewhere but Ford is absolutely mortified by the idea of you seeing him in bell-bottom jeans.

It doesn’t matter how long you two have been together, every time he sees you he feels the same as he did the day you two met. Ford will never stop becoming flustered at the sight of you.

Post-Weirdmaggedon he became very anxious at the thought of you being out alone or not being near him. He feels like he needs to be on guard at all times so that he can protect you. He eventually calms down after some reassurance from you and a fuck ton of therapy.

While he lacks some emotional intelligence he’s actually very attentive and knows exactly what you need when you’re upfront about your feelings. As long as you’re not vague and communicate, he knows what to do to help you.

Adding onto that, I think he briefly studied psychology in college so he’d have a pretty good understanding of any mental health issues you might have.

Said “No more Mr Nice Guy” one time and hasn’t heard the end of it from anyone.

NSFW

Has to stop himself from cumming too quickly when you tell him how good he’s making you feel. Stroking his ego (and other things) is the best way to get him horny.

Will always ask you for consent no matter what it is. You could be mid-fuck and he’d still ask if he could put his hands on your hips.

This is just my personal headcanon but I believe while he didn’t really have too much experience before he got stuck on the other side of the portal (probably hooked up with Fiddleford once or twice tho), I fully believe that after a few years of dimension-hopping, he would’ve had a few one-night stands (mans gotta blow off some steam). So when he gets the chance to fuck you, a real human from his dimension, he’s more than ecstatic, especially since he’s picked up more than a few tricks over the past thirty years.

Knows how to use all twelve of his fingers.

Since Ford was sucked into the portal in the early ’80s and spent thirty years in there, he’s super confused when you mention shaving down there or being embarrassed about your body hair (if you do either) since the last time he was around everyone preferred going all natural.

This one’s less sexy but I’m putting it here anyways. He avoided taking off his shirt for ages since he didn’t want you to see all the scars he’d gotten over the years or any of the tattoos related to the things he did in the portal, especially the ones related to Bill. Surprisingly not as insecure about his “Flirty Gal” tramp stamp.

Doesn’t understand that he’s ridiculously hot. 

You jokingly said “Yes sir” one time and he got hard so quickly.

Although he does rather enjoy you taking the lead.

Loves experimenting with cock warming and edging. Literally. He’ll time the both of you and have everything written down somewhere and draw a graph with extra info like if you’re someone with a menstrual cycle and how that affects the results.

[gayestcowboy]

fantasy dildo recs please? im trying to find one that isnt like $100 but is still good and reputable and wont fill my body with microplastics. ive been looking at neotori and they look great but;; the price;;; anyway yeah recs please?

hi! i have a lot of information for you.

first off, my specific recommendations of fantasy toy shops i’ve bought from or know to be reputable: uberrime, wandering bard, twilight meadow creations, strange bedfellas, pleasure forge, pp sculptors, batbites, xenocat artifacts. all of these shops have toys under 100 usd. uberrime especially has a huge selection including non-fantasy, realistic, and dual density. my top 3 fantasy toys right now are TMC’s ambrose (mini), wandering bard’s shadow demon (x small), and uberrime’s ardor dragon (small). highly recommend ambrose to transmascs with bottom growth. also it looks cool as fuck. mine is bright green and yellow.

second, this google doc is a masterpost of fantasy and fantasy-adjacent sex toy companies (created as a list of alternatives to bad dragon) and is organized quite well, and includes some shops to be wary of. it was last updated in 2022 so it’s outdated, but it’s massive and still quite useful. safe fantasy toys dot com also lists body safe toy companies, although you should still check reputability of the company before you buy (some of the companies listed on the site should still be avoided for various reasons— try cross checking with the google doc, browsing reddit, etc). all of the specific companies i recommend in this post use platinum silicone only, but if you go searching for other toys make sure to avoid jelly and other porous materials because they cannot be sanitized properly and will store bacteria. just like with piercing and body jewelry (another one of my special interests lol), it’s always better to pay more for safety when it’s something going inside your body. reputable stores will always list the material, and tend to have pages on their sites with even more specific information on their silicone. shipping also affects the price, especially international shipping.

also, when youre shopping for fantasy toys, make sure you check the sizing. smaller toys are frequently under 100 usd. many fantasy toys tend to be quite large anyways, especially knotted toys (many small knotted toys still have diameters of 2”+ which is too large for me personally. for reference i think the average human penis is somewhere around 1.5” diameter and my personal maximum for toys right now is ~1.75). there’s so much diversity in fantasy toys that you will probably be able to find toys that fit your desired length/girth and are still classified as small and therefore less expensive. if you’re new to fantasy toys or have trouble with insertion (or even just have an average sized vagina/rectum), small fantasy toys can be cost efficient and accessible and more fun than more standard toys. many stores will also sell b-grade toys at a discount for minor cosmetic flaws that don’t affect usage. also, there’s a pretty big market for secondhand toys/dong sales on twitter, reddit, etc so if you’re willing to buy secondhand, that can be more cost efficient. quality silicone toys can be properly sanitized by boiling and other methods. for more cheap options— good glass toys can frequently be under 50 usd, and are easy to sanitize. also, tantus isn’t quite a fantasy brand, but it’s very high quality and has some great toys on the cheaper side (i love the tantus magma). and if you want a really good cheap vibrator, the romp hype is amazing and only 35 usd.

i am by no means an expert, just incredibly autistic, but i hope this helps! i’m always happy to try answering questions about sex toys!

[transmechanicus]

I’ve had a deep seated fear of the flesh-eating undead type zombie since like age 6 and i think i finally figured out why it formed before i had ever seen so much as a nanosecond of media depicting them.

See, in my actual nightmares, while there are very much stereotypical hordes of ravenous, rotting creatures, there is always an awareness to my dream self that they can be tricked. If i cannot run or fight or hide i must convince them from my behavior that i’m one of them, that i am already eaten, infected, dead, and returned. This is not a common thing in zombie media, yet it’s always part of my dreams.

I’ve realized in the last couple months as i’ve navigated new social situations and stressful performances as part of my PhD, that there’s a pretty clear core to why zombies are scary to me, someone with lifelong struggles to conceal and suppress autistic and transgender behaviors. It’s the idea of being recognized as something different and being savagely killed for it. It’s the idea that even your own family could turn on you for your differences. It’s the idea that you’re under constant threat and scrutiny of your entire being by everyone around you. That nowhere is safe enough to protect you if enough people recognize you’re not like them. Which y’know, i’m sure is a completely relatable fear for everyone reading this, right? Right? Why are you opening your mouths? D:

[copperbadge]

RE watching thoughts: I’m not 100% sure, but it might be that the whole “I am not my thoughts” is about engaging and identifying with your metacognition MORE than your initial thoughts. Because I get where you’re coming from - what is a consciousness but a collection of thoughts and feelings? But you can also have thoughts about your own thoughts that are more useful for dealing with whatever situation you’re in, I guess. (Random aside - every time I start thinking about thinking about thinking my brain inevitably starts thinking about Tiffany Aching and The Wee Free Men.)

I really should have replied to this ask sooner because it's going to seem like a non-sequitur now (this was sent much earlier in March) but I'm kind of glad I didn't, because I've been chatting with people about this and I think I understand more why there's an emphasis in some therapies on the idea that we are not our thoughts.

(I uh, haven't read the Tiffany books so I'm not much help there.)

I am coming to understand that many, perhaps most, people judge themselves, comprehensively and harshly, based on their thoughts. Perhaps it's just a lot of people who struggle with mental health, but given the commonality of the sentiment I don't know if I'd confine it that tightly; generally it appears that people cannot conceive of themselves as anything other than a binary of good or bad. So many people I've talked to about this portion of DBT, the watching-questioning-identifying thoughts portion, say that it helps to snap them out of a spiral of "I'm a horrible person, I deserve to suffer/die, I can never be redeemed" after they've failed at something, or had a negative thought, or reacted poorly to an unexpected event.

That is not something I've ever experienced. I mean, jokingly maybe, but not in a real, internal sense.

And that's not to brag -- I'm not saying I think I'm a good person, either, because I don't think I'm a good person. I don't conceive of myself in terms of good or bad. I never cuddle my cats and think "I'm such a good cat dad" or forget to feed them and think "I should die now." I have a perpetual morally neutral attitude towards my own existence; my thoughts and actions might trend me one direction or another but I'm aware of the temporary nature of that. If I fuck up I'll worry about who I might have hurt or whether I'll be fired or what's going to happen as a consequence, if I am polite to someone who didn't deserve it I know I was acting kindly in the moment, but I don't make an inherent moral judgement of myself based on that. And it seems like the vast majority of people do. Which you would think would make me feel pretty good about myself, but honestly...I don't know.

A lot of people I know who have ADHD or are Autistic have talked about seeing themselves as other, as alien -- like that one webcomic artist who draws themself with little antennae to indicate they're strange and different. I've always understood why one might do that, but I never felt that way myself, before or after the diagnosis. After all, let's remember, I was The Normal* Child of my siblings, and if I was The Normal One before the diagnosis, why wouldn't I remain Mostly Normal after?

* As ever, I'm using "normal" as a cultural term, to indicate what we think of as mainstream, not because normal is a thing that really exists.

My life has been relatively solitary -- I have friends and family and I love them but I'm rarely part of a large group, I don't spend a lot of time out in public interacting with people, I'm not a big socializer. Before the Adderall, I really couldn't be, I took too much psychic damage from interpersonal interaction, so I chose those very carefully. And now my DBT class has been a rare moment when I'm encountering contradictions to a lot of my assumptions about the way human beings in our society interact, react, and behave. I just...don't fit that mold very well. I think of it as having crossed wiring, not in the sense that I'm faulty but just in the sense that I'm very, very different. Not Normal. It's not exactly a bad feeling but it's certainly not a great one, internalizing the sensation of alienness.

DBT is proving to be a mixed bag but not in the way I or my therapist intended -- it seems to be either things I was already instinctively doing or things that simply do not apply to me. In one way it's disappointing because it means there isn't much help to be had (we're a little over halfway through the course and I keep thinking "Maybe next class will be useful") but on the other hand it's validating that so much of what I came up with myself as unconscious coping mechanisms is literally what I would have been told to do anyway.

Sometimes it's a combination of both, though, which really blows. I guess most people, if they reframe another person's actions, actually find emotional relief in that, and I don't. An example from the class is that if someone is rude to you, you can consider how they might be having a hard day, and be polite in return; that's great, in terms of defusing a situation, and it's something I do a fair amount of. But apparently it's also something that for most people results in feeling less awful about the interaction, and that's not the case for me. Which is why so much of DBT feels to me like lying to oneself. It's not lying for most people.

So, yeah. I'm going to finish out the course and keep trying things with the therapist but I suspect given everything, I might already be at "as good as it gets" in terms of emotional work. Which isn't the worst thing in the world, and there is still the option to try medication that could help, but I think there will come a point where I'm going to have to deal with the fallout of just how different I am, and how that has impacted my life. Might end up a good thing; something I've really been trying to resolve is unhappiness over being unpartnered and highly likely to remain that way, and at least if this provides a better understanding of why, then perhaps I can process that and put it to rest in a way I've been trying to do but not succeeding well at.

So, we'll see. But I find it both fascinating and kind of horrifying how many people can believe they are irredeemably bad, even if the belief is only temporary, simply because they had an uncharitable thought or impulse. It makes me somewhat grateful for the crossed wires, at least.

[roseofthewind]

Furina and High-Masking Autism

A lot of people don’t know how to recognize high-masking autism because its presentation challenges many stereotypes about what autistic people are like, but Furina continues to be a perfect example of it.

It should go without saying, but I love Furina as a character and this analysis is in no way putting her down. Autism is an entirely neutral trait that carries through to adulthood, and if you have a strong negative reaction to the idea of a character you like being autistic, you have probably absorbed a lot of misconceptions about autism and have some unconscious prejudice to unpack.

In the paragraphs that follow, I am going to explain several autistic traits and give examples of how Furina displays each trait.

*thinking face on*

1. Autism is, at its core, a difference in the way the brain takes in, processes, and shares information. This can make it challenging to communicate with other people who don’t share this neurotype, but a high-masking autistic person has observed the way other people interact and spent years copying them, figuring out through trial and error how to act to best fit in and get the most positive responses from other people.

Furina’s ascension speech in Act V of the Fontaine Archon Quest, where she first presents herself to the people of Fontaine, is a great example of this observation of others with the goal of masking as well as possible. Furina initially gives the speech as comes naturally to her in a very straightforward and honest manner (also an autistic trait!). After the speech, she realizes that her citizens are responding with hostility to her humility and lack of authoritarianism, so she then plays off the original speech as a ruse and immediately redoes the entire thing more assertively according to the feedback she picked up on.

(Calm down, Furina… Think. Think. What do the people want? How would they imagine a god to speak and act?)

Fontaine AQ Act V, Chinese audio: (link starts video at 3:10:07) https://youtu.be/T-AbXi5bufk?si=eQADAWw6n8Sk0PZE&t=11407

This is the kind of social trial and error that many autistic people do over the course of years so that eventually we can say the “right thing” the first time around, and it’s a testimony to Furina’s skills as an actor that she course-corrects so quickly.

Because of all the constant mental calculations, social situations are usually very tiring for autistic people, even when the social event lines up with their interests. In Clorinde’s Story Quest, Furina has no interest in Navia’s suggestion of pulling an all-nighter to keep playing D&D (I mean, Tabletop Troupe!) and wants to go home and rest.

Furina: Huh!? Oh, um… I’m not sure I’ll have enough energy for that…

Furina has shown other signs of needing to take a break from socializing– for instance, in Lynette’s hangout event quest, Lynette gets tired of all the people at her post-performance reception and goes upstairs to a quieter room to find Furina already there.

Furina offers to give Lynette tips on the best ways to slip away from an event, and Lynette misunderstands at first and isn’t interested in Furina’s advice because she thinks Furina loves everything about the spotlight and doesn’t realize how much they have in common. This goes a long way to show just how well Furina masks her autistic traits!

Furina: I see you’ve escaped the crowds to seek refuge on the second floor. Fame can be overwhelming at first, can’t it? Perhaps you’d benefit from hearing about the experiences of a veteran celebrity such as myself?

Lynette: No thanks, I’m good. Pretty sure this’ll be my first and last time in this situation…

Furina: Hey, at least let me finish! I have top tips on dealing with belligerent reporters, slipping away to hunt down snacks during the intermission…

Lynette: …Tell me everything.

Conversely, when alone, Furina will stay up late reading or doing something else that interests her and will not feel the same need to stop and rest, because when alone, there is no need to expend extra energy worrying about socializing properly.

At the beginning of the Fontinalia Film Festival limited event story, Traveler and Paimon go to Furina’s apartment and she answers the door sounding a bit groggy.

Paimon: Did you just get up, Furina? It’s already past noon, you know…

After Traveler chastises Paimon for being rude, Paimon panics and says something nonsensical about how the weather is so nice in the afternoon and sleeping in is fine, actually, and Furina responds that she’s just a bit tired because she was up late reading:

Furina: I was just up late last night reading some novels…

When focused on an interest, it’s very easy for an autistic person to lose track of time and it can be difficult to break out of the focused state and go to bed. (This is a trait that overlaps significantly with ADHD.)

2. Alexithymia is a difficulty with identifying, processing, and expressing your own emotions, and in extreme cases presents as an almost total lack of emotion. Some degree of alexithymia is common in autistic people.

I believe, in the flashback scene below from Act V of the Fontaine Archon Quest, that Furina genuinely did not realize she was upset and did not realize she was crying, which could be explained by alexithymia.

Fontainian citizen: Are… are you crying?

(If you played this part with the English voice acting and interpreted it differently, try listening to it in Chinese- Furina’s voice sounds completely confident and in control the entire time, and it’s not until the other person points out she’s crying that Furina sounds at all upset.)

Fontaine AQ Act V, Chinese audio: (link starts video at 3:22:00) https://youtu.be/T-AbXi5bufk?si=fl8xSwkQ0rRLFPQU&t=12121

I am a believer that Furina and Focalors were originally the same person, and Focalors is just Furina’s divinity and pre-archonhood memories— so if Furina is autistic, Focalors is autistic.

While talking to Neuvillette, Focalors is extremely matter-of-fact with her explanation of her plan, very matter-of-fact about the suffering of her own human self, and very matter-of-fact about her own impending death. There is no show of emotion— she just tells Neuvillette the facts. This could be related to alexithymia, but regardless it is a very autistic way of communicating that is often misinterpreted as cold and uncaring. In actuality, someone who is willing to sacrifice their own immortality, divine power, and freedom to save other people’s lives cares a great deal, even if the tone of their voice doesn’t reflect it!

Focalors: I mean, did you think I would be the sort to enjoy peaceful repose while Furina suffered?

3. The autistic nervous system takes in a lot of information that a neurotypical person’s would filter out as not being important enough to bother with- this is why autistic people are so much more sensitive to sounds, lights, textures, and any changes in the environment. Too much sensory input can actually feel painful.

There is a documented instance of the Opera Epiclese becoming so loud that Furina was overstimulated enough to yell at everyone to be quiet.

Furthermore, post-Archon Quest, after moving out of the Palais Mermonia and into her own apartment, Furina eats primarily macaroni for an unspecified amount of time— weeks or months on end. After a huge life change, it’s common for an autistic person to want anything they can control to be the same, so their brain has more space to process everything that’s different.

There is no neurotypical explanation for eating the same food over and over to the exclusion of everything else. It makes no sense to someone who doesn’t experience overstimulation and distress at too much change. Case in point, during Furina’s Story Quest, Traveler and Paimon are rather baffled:

Traveler: …Don’t you get sick of macaroni every day?

Furina: Not at all. As long as you have different kinds of sauces in, you can have macaroni and tomato sauce one week, macaroni and bolognese the next…

Notice that Furina says “macaroni and tomato sauce one week,” implying that she’s fine with just that sauce for an entire week, and then uses a different sauce for the next entire week. Still not very much variety!

Paimon: Oh, sounds like you’re really struggling to cope��� Traveler: Is it because you have to do all your own cooking now?

Yes, Furina is struggling to cope, but not because she’s incapable of learning how to cook more complex dishes! She’s just too burnt out to want to make or eat a variety of things right now. Furina explains this and Paimon doesn’t believe her, but since we know that Furina’s special dish is an even more extravagant version of La Lettre a Focalors, if Furina is capable of baking at that level, she would certainly be capable of cooking.

4. Stimming, or self-stimulatory behaviors, are repetitive actions that serve to regulate or soothe the nervous system. There are countless behaviors that can be used as stims, but some common ones are rocking back and forth, hand flapping or waving, leg bouncing, skin picking or scratching, rubbing or squeezing a comforting object, dancing, spinning in circles, humming or vocalizing, or listening to the same song on repeat for hours. (It’s worth noting that stimming is not exclusive to autism— especially when stressed neurotypical people do some of these things too. Stimming can also be commonly exhibited by people with ADHD who aren’t autistic, although there are also a significant number of people with both ADHD and autism.)

One of Furina’s idle animations and also her normal attack sequence include behaviors that can be interpreted as stimming. Furina’s idle animation with Surintendante Chevalmarin involves her holding the seahorse up, waving her around, squeezing her tightly and rubbing her face on her head. Chevalmarin is made entirely of water and loves Furina dearly, and so does not mind being cuddled like a stuffed animal.

If you use all four of Furina’s normal attacks, she spins around several times and the final attack culminates with her spinning on a bubble and swinging her sword for AOE. If you use just three of Furina’s normal attacks and do not append any additional actions, Furina spins around again before plunging the tip of her sword into the ground (I do not have a gif of this). Furina also spins around when added to your 4-character party. That’s a lot of spinning, which certainly makes it seem like a preferred stim!

5. I got this far without mentioning special interests because I have so much other evidence that I hardly need to bring it up— but since it’s a much more commonly recognized autistic trait than many of the things I discussed at the beginning, I will include this part of Furina’s teapot dialogue, which does indicate that Furina engages in special interests:

Furina pretty much defines “special interest” with the above statement: it’s something that you’re interested in (to the point that it may feel like an obsession) and you have to know everything about it!

These are just a few examples of autistic traits that Furina exhibits— there are absolutely more. Furina is shown many times to have a high level of near constant anxiety despite being someone who is confident enough to perform on stage. This anxiety could come from other sources, like c-PTSD, but it’s very common for a high-masking autistic person to have chronic anxiety from being hyper-aware of avoiding potential social blunders, repressing stimming to appear more “normal,” and dealing with the increased risk of overstimulation that comes with repressing stimming.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading! Even if you don’t agree with my interpretation of the character, I do genuinely hope you learned something about autism.

[genderqueerdykes]

Hi, I’m asexual, like, pretty asexual. Do most people actually need sex? I don’t feel horny, don’t desire any kind of sex or sexual pleasure, but I’ve heard things like ‘people need sex every once in a while’. Sometimes, it’s said by those asshole ‘manosphere’ guys who like to claim women owe them sex because they ‘need it’, but do most people actually need sex? Am I actually risking my health by not being interested or wanting to do sexual things ever?

I’m autistic, so I can’t ever fully be sure if it’s just a figure of speech or not. For the longest time, I thought ‘picture something in your mind’ was figurative, turns out I just have aphantasia. This is very much a queer people question, but I dunno if you can help me with this one.

that's good that you're asking! i'm also autistic and take things at face value.

the short answer is that it's a figure of speech, and it's just manipulative misogyny. nobody truly "needs" sex, this is just misogynstic programming to make men believe women are sex objects and our only purpose is to pleasure them. it's not a legitimate thing

i'm also aceflux as well. even outside of misogynstic beliefs like that, nobody needs to have sex with anyone. it's a choice someone makes about how they experience sexual pleasure. many people live just fine masturbating and many people just don't interact with sexuality at all. many people who don't identify as asexual don't have sex, either. the thing about sex is that we're constantly telling ourselves that if you're cool, that's what you're doing all day long, but the reality is that most people don't have sex that often

people with penises can sometimes develop testicular cancer if they do not flush out some of their old sperm for new developing sperm but this does not happen to everyone, and in cases where the body absolutely needs to purge those cells, it will result in nocturnal emissions. most people with penises will not deal with this

it's good that you took the time to ask! you are fine not having sex, even masturbating isn't necessary. many people just don't have a libido and that's okay. it's not necessary for your health, especially if it would damage your mental health. also a lot of sexual encounters are awkward, uncomfortable, and unpleasureable. often times they can result in both parties not wanting to interact anymore. there are certain things about sex that i enjoy but it actively damages my mental health, so i don't do it very often. i hope that helped somewhat. take care of yourself!

[catsconflictscopicsandchamomile]

ok calling out tumblr as a whole rn, gonna keep this reallll brief and simple

Leave. The Neil Gaiman fandom. ALONE.

are the takes coming out of it right now rancid? Yes.

It has been LESS THAN ONE DAY.

LESS. THEN. ONE. DAY.

Everyone rn talking about how they “already knew” and then using that as justification to engage in the WORST, MOST PERSONALLY INSULTING, DEGRADING, HEARTLESS, DEHUMANIZING, AND *CONSISTENTLY FUCKING ABLEIST* BEHAVIOR I HAVE EVER SEEN ON THIS SITE

All y’all need to step back and remember when and how you DID learn this about Neil, or about powerful people/celebrities in general. y’all know you didn’t process it instantly, cleanly, or without any emotional turmoil, grief and deeply bad takes on the way to acceptance. And I’m sure the vast majority of y’all have SOMETHING that you like right this instant where you “separate the art from the artist”. This isn’t a “gotcha”, that’s LITERALLY JUST A NORMAL PART OF MODERN MEDIA CONSUMPTION

and even if you’re some pure untainted angel who only likes things that were entirely created by good people and has the ability to instantly detach all emotional, artistic and other ties to a piece of media once it becomes Bad(tm)….

You still have no right to treat these ppl like this. Plain and simple. These are the reactions of people who just had their view of their favorite author shattered

YESTERDAY

and while some will inevitably stay and defend Neil (fuck those guys), the majority WILL process this and react appropriately, just like I did, just like yall did.

(and if “appropriately” turns out to involve taking back the fandom en masse… listen I’m leery on it too but I think it would be a genuinely good idea to try. Interesting if nothing else, and absolutely not a cause for further hate) To treat entire fandoms this way, this immediately…. I am hundreds of times more ashamed to share a fandom, a website or a PLANET with y’all than with the ppl saying stupid shit while processing this stuff for the first time. The news itself was upsetting but unsurprising. Seeing y’all turn into Reddit chuds projectile vomiting anti-autistic stereotypes and telling people to off themselves is making me genuinely fucking sick.

I’m so angry. All this finally coming to light and you’ve all chosen hatred. Fuck you, fuck all of you. I don’t even have words.

Edit for clarification: I am NOT asking that Neil or his fans not be held accountable. I am asking people to have the basic fucking human decency to give the fandom ANY TIME AT ALL to process this stuff before rolling out the personal insults and su*c*de baiting.

Give People Time To Sort Through Their Feelings. Let People Process. Not forever, just a few days. Most likely yall didn’t process this instantly when you first learned about it, so stop expecting others to. Don’t be dicks. That simple.

EDIT TWO:

This post is NOT calling out criticizing people who defend Neil. Again: FUCK THOSE GUYS. This is a post calling out the massive amounts of hate currently directed at people who are just fucking upset, who believe the victims and feel furious, betrayed, etc, and yes even people whose first thoughts were of their fandoms. If they aren’t defending Neil, they aren’t defending Neil. In fact if they’re being weird and messy about fandom or internal stuff, it’s pretty clear that they’re FUCKING FURIOUS at Neil.

In fact, perhaps consider redirecting all this hate to the people actually defending Neil, instead of people who obviously hate him but whose processing methods are kinda cringe.

[dragonpyre]

Touch starvation is a very real thing.

The post where you asked about it felt pretty flowery/easy to interpret as exaggeration and I thought giving you some entirely factual examples might help convey what it's like without that ambiguity. Gonna try not to make this into me venting in your inbox, I know how unpleasant that shit is, and I'm doing better now so please don't feel like you've got to comfort the anon stranger here! I promise I am fine and will continue to be okay, I have better life circumstances now *pretend I could put a thumbs up thingy here lol*

So anyhow here's the description part: There was no one to touch me and prove that I existed, so I dissociated a lot. Extreme pressure and/or light impact overlapped with what I actually needed just enough that I could kinda get by on that sometimes. I used to wake up every day to my whole body aching because I'd been unconsciously seeking touch in my sleep by pushing myself against the wall and my pillows over and over again. There was a deep desire to be violently ripped apart, because gentle touch was out of reach and I was overwhelmed by constant unfulfilled need.

Like the post says, actual touch becomes very overwhelming. The one time I actually got to hold someone to sleep, I couldn't actually sleep, it was just too much, something like a positive version of fear, a kind of emotional adrenaline-shivering, good but utterly exhausting and with that same sense of being emotionally high strung like a wire tensed to the point of snapping.

That might be called excitement?? My autistic ass does not have the ability to identify emotions that well lmao, but it was for sure a whole heck of a lot of something or other, and the only possibility of sleep would have been moving away to another room.

It's worth keeping in mind that most people won't ever experience it this intensely. Plenty of people get hungry, fewer have experienced actual starvation, and there's always some people who don't feel hunger much at all no matter the circumstances. So it goes for the desire to be touched too.

All this to say that yes, for many people skin to skin contact is a need like sleep is a need and if we go without it for long enough (months, years, decades) we fall apart.

I legit thought people were just exaggerating this stuff. I’m touch averse 24/7 and have never desired physical touch in my life so it’s strange (for me) to see that this is smth that actually legit affects people

[bubblesandducky]

Gushing over how Arcane does boobs in a purely artistic (and autistic) way

So I noticed something because I was doing what I often do, and look at gifs of boob physics in arcane (leave me alone I’m simply a woman with needs) But I noticed that it looked like Vi was wearing a bra in season 2.

To a normal person it isn’t anything they’d even think anything of BUT I’m built different (autism). I was thinking about how she binds her chest with bandages during her pitfighter era, and wondered if when she was in Stillwater she would’ve ever been given a bra. So I thought back and was pretty sure that in season 1 her chest was modeled in a way that seemed like it was just braless or with light bandaging. I went back to check and I was RIGHT.

What is so COOL about it, is that when modeling season 1 vs season 2 Vi, the modelers put in so much thought and detail that they considered not only the layers under her clothes, but what she realistically had ACCESS TO.

In season 2, they added the structure of a bra under those same clothes because she most likely now has access to being fitted and getting a bra. Especially since she eventually receives an enforcer uniform (I imagine they have a dress code)

There’s also a model quality jump between seasons but I don’t think that’s the reason for her new chest. Because they also did a similar thing with Caitlyn in season 1.

Since I am the way I am I’ve always noticed how much more prominent her boobs are in her uniform, but now that I’m looking back, there’s a lot more to it

It’s obvious with her tank top, and I think most high quality animations would take the time to differentiate between bra and tank top. The most interesting thing to me is when she changes into the purple outfit that Vi takes from some random woman.

The shirt isn’t her exact size, so she probably had to ditch her bra, and it looks like she probably did! Her boobs are still somewhat supported in this shirt but in a DIFFERENT WAY. They are now supported by the constraint of the smaller shirt, and the corset below which causes them to have a more “spilling over” shape to them.

This is one of the many reasons that I’m so blown away but the talent and thought put into this show at every single level. It shows that not only do the modelers put so much thought into the clothing they model, but that they also consider the story when doing so. It’s so wonderful to see a show where each creative team is so dedicated to making something beautiful in their own respective roles. I LOVE COLLABORATIVE ART!!!!

[cripplecharacters]

hi! I’m tryi be to write a fantasy book. Most of my characters are disabled for several reasons. For example, 2 of them are written very clearly autistic, because I am*. One of those also has adhd and trauma, and the other also has c-ptsd. My question is pertaining a different character. He is a cyborg. I want to make this a species in my book, but I’m not sure how to go about it. I am also considering making it a catch-all term used in my fantasy world for those who are given prosthetics. Anyway. I want cyborgs to have a culture and stuff like that. How would you recommend you about this? If this isn’t worded very clearly or more details are necessary, please let me know and I’ll elaborate. Thank you. /all genuine *i am not diagnosed, unfortunately

Hey,

[standard disclaimer that we don't have amputee mods]

Please don't make any kind of disabled people into a separate species. What you're describing as a species are literally just amputees. They are very much human and suggesting otherwise is dehumanization. Losing a leg doesn't turn you into a different kind of being.

Don't shy away from using the actual words, just like "disabled" is not a bad word, so isn't "amputee". Same as how autistic people are humans with autism, not [different species] with [sci-fi word].

Making a culture is an interesting topic, since in the disability context, pretty much only Deaf and DeafBlind people are considered to have a culture in the traditional sense. Three main factors are involved in it; one, these often run in families, so there can be generations of people involved and passing the culture and language, two, there are schools designed for Deaf and DeafBlind people that help them connect with each other, and three, the disability directly impacts communication so they have their respective languages, which tends to be an important part of cultures in general. How would the amputee culture of your setting work? Amputation is rarely genetic and not that common, many amputees don't know a whole many other amputees. What would their culture be based on? Amputees will often become disabled later in life, many of them would already have their own communities. How much would different members have in common with each other to create a whole culture? A mobility aid in the form of a prosthetic didn't result in there being prosthesis culture in real life, nor it did for any other mobility aid. I'm not saying they can't have their own culture, but I just don't see how it would come to appear in the setting.

As mentioned earlier, we don't have amputee mods, and it would be helpful to work with a sensitivity reader who is one if you're planning to make a whole culture centering people with a particular disability.

mod Sasza

Hello, thank you for your ask!

A cyborg would not be a different species since they are still part human, and an amputee would especially not be a different species, they are still human and exist as human in the real world. A different species would be something like full robots or ‘humans’ with extremely modified dna to the point that they cannot be classified under homo sapien. To exclude someone from the human species because of their disability would be dehumanization, and I would recommend against it!

Calling everyone who uses a prosthetic a cyborg in a futuristic setting isn’t a bad idea [cyborgs in media are basically just amputees with robotic body modifications], but remember not all prosthetics are robotic, especially leg/foot prosthetics.

As for them having their own culture, I actually like the idea! Just note the culture wouldn’t come from being separated from other groups of people like how historical cultures formed, but rather a culture within the larger culture. In a world where prosthetics are more robotic there would probably be forums and workshops, people passing tips for clustering wires and what joint attachments work the smoothest and what repair shops are affordable. Basically people brought together by something they share, but not isolated from the outside world, if that makes sense.

And as always remember, cybernetic prosthetics aren’t perfect replacements! Here is a post that elaborates on that specifically:

https://www.tumblr.com/cripplecharacters/764893470773084160

Have a lovely day!

Mod Rot

[lakesbian]

okay rachel posting time. i am going to have opinions on her

The scentless man waits for something, then speaks again, “Are you okay?” “Fuckin’ peachy.”  Brutus knows Master only says fuck word like that when she’s mad. “I have a hard time believing that, to be honest.  You were in pretty rough shape when I found you with Über and Leet’s henchmen, and those guys from the ABB.” “I’m fine now,” Master tells him.  She sounds angry.  Brutus steps forward, ready to growl to add own voice to hers, but Master tugs on leash just a little and Brutus stays quiet. “When I found you, one of them had you tied to the ceiling by your wrists and was using you as a punching bag.” Master breaks eye contact.  Brutus knows this is a sign that Master sees the scentless man as her alpha.  When she speaks, she still sounds angry, “I fucked up.  I was bored, restless, figured I’d walk Angelica and see if I could meet you guys where the money was.  Someone recognized me and tailed me.  I was stupid, I took my licks for it.  I’m fine now, we have the money, all is well.” The scentless man sighs.  Sounds a little angry as he says, “It’s not… no, nevermind.  No use getting into it.  But what if someone recognizes you while you’re walking him?” “I’ll fight back sooner, harder.  Or are you going to tell me I can’t walk my dogs anymore?”  All of a sudden, Master is tense.  Brutus can see it in her legs, hear it in her voice, feel it in her grip on the leash. “I wouldn’t do that,” the scentless man replies, his voice quiet, slightly strained “And you wouldn’t listen even if I did.  Just… be careful.” “I can go?” “Go.  Enjoy your walk, both of you.”

it's like...rachel's entire childhood was spent in an environment where any "concern" or attention from her authority figures was invariably going to be extremely ableist and confusing and scary for her. so much of how autistic children learn to approach interactions w/ ppl with social power over them is predicated on adults treating them like they're doing something atrociously wrong when they can't guess what that thing is, and no one ever explains. even "concern" for the child tends to result in "polite" attempts to force them into a specific socially acceptable mold, regardless of the cost to their mental wellbeing. i'm sure rachel has had uncountable experiences where she was made to feel like her distress or pain was her fault + worthy of punishment: because she was stupid, because she was retarded, because she couldn't act right, because she's a bad kid.

so, you know. of course she reacts to aggression and wariness with brian--her team leader--approaching her like this. he's asking if she's okay because he cares, but that doesn't change how often she gets treated like a bad dog on a leash. how is she supposed to know this is different from the times he gets mad at her for "doing something wrong," where she can't understand what the "wrong" thing is? how is she supposed to know this is different from all the hundreds of times that's happened to her before she even met him? he doesn't care about the money, here, but she has to cover her bases in bringing up that it's intact, because experience has taught her that people care more about how her behavior inconvenienced them than about how she's doing. it even sounds like he's about to say "it's not about the money" before he realizes that it's fruitless to go that route with rachel.

by "you were being used as a punching bag," he means "you were really being hurt badly, are you sure you're okay? i'm trying to check in on and help you," but all rachel hears is a reiteration of how she fucked up. he means "what if someone recognizes you while you're walking him?" as an inquiry into her safety. (he's incredibly protective of the undersiders during the bakuda fight, and afterwards he chooses to check on alec over detaining bakuda, so i'm sure the idea that rachel was kidnapped & hurt and he couldn't do anything about it rattled him, and he wants to ensure it can't happen again.) but rachel hears it as a subtle threat of punishment.

it's just Sooo. Soo Very. to see how her team is never quite able to figure out how to convey their care for her in a way that doesn't feel like a trap. rachie :(

[count-geiger]

alright guys i got a surprise class cancellation so i can tell yall about the stb dress rehearsal show last night and how it went. this is gonna be a long one grab a drink

no JUICY DEETS if you were expecting that. i am not a leaker and will never be. more like a gushy review than anything

so if you wanna hear about how will wood now knows about my university’s garfield club, feel free to read.

first of all, i can’t actually say much about the content of the show itself. sorry if that’s what you were hoping for but, if you’re going to a show on the tour, YOU WILL THANK ME LATER.

however i can say some stuff

like first of all: it is very much a kind of theatrical performance. no shit sherlock, you may be saying. okay sure but what i mean by that is that it’s not JUST a concert.

it’s very narrative based, that’s the most i’m going to say on it.

additionally, based on stuff ww said after the show while everyone talking feedback and such…

after the tour starts, PLEASE DO NOT POST SPOILERS ON TUMBLR!!! this is the kind of thing you’re going to want to see without any idea going in.

like it’s also very much a comedy show and knowing all the jokes beforehand will kinda ruin it.

so if you wanna post about the show on tumblr after you’ve seen it, maybe like. tag it or something. or put under a cut.

anyways i digress

the show was absolutely fantastic

genuinely the most wonderful i’ve ever seen in my entire life

i laughed my ass off, i cried a little, i thought way too hard about my own life decisions

all the things you’d ever want

it was NOT what i expected it to be. but it was even better than whatever i was expecting

so PLEASE take my word that all of you are going to love it.

okay that train of thought is over anyways

the vending machine at the studio only took ones (LITERALLY FUCK OFF THATS SO DUMB) so i spent most of the show with the driest mouth known to man

i’d had a sprite from said vending machine when i first got there because they also don’t have any water in it (????????) but not even like a whole can it got warm super fast

that’s just a random aside

multiple people complimented both my button down shirt AND the oingo boingo shirt i had underneath

including will’s girlfriend!! who is very pretty and seems very very nice.

she took our phones at the doors and checked our IDs and such and she was fine with the fact that i do not own a piece of ID that confirms my date of birth so that was cool.

the phone pouches we had were handmade by her apparently! they were really cool and she did a great job

anyways

i met will after the show after trying to offer feedback while we were still doing that that and stumbling through my horrific brain fog to say nothing of value because i was terribly sleep deprived!

me and jay (@jayjamjary) went at the same time

now some background.

me and jay are friends IRL, we go to the same college. people who both A. follow me and B. consistently read my ramblings in the tags will know this. but there are like three of those people AND i’m putting tags on this post so yeah

anyways we are both members of the executive board of the (officially recognized) GARFIELD CLUB at our university.

i am dead serious

and because the garfield club’s primary demographic is gay/trans autistic people, there’s a huge population of will wood fans in that club.

so jay brought two excellent drawings he’d made for the club, originally to recruit members, for will to sign.

because we have garfield show and tell contest on wednesday and we wanted to fuckin win

ANYWAYS.

these drawings, by the way, just happened to be of garfield being crucified and of garfield as hatsune miku.

will’s reaction to seeing these drawings was, and i quote, “what the fuck”

his reaction to the existence of the garfield club was, and i quote, “what the fuck”

both like a very amused, bewildered what the fuck.

he then signed them with possibly the greatest thing he’s ever signed ANYTHING and i’ll have to force jay to post them.

anyways

i also showed him a drawing i made for him, because i wanted to make a drawing for him.

he said my drawing was really really cool and he was really happy that i got his nose right because he never sees that

i was SO happy to hear that i was like ready to cry i was scared that drawing sucked

cuz i just did in the course of like a few hours while sitting at a random table in a big room on campus and all that whatever

but like yeah he called his girlfriend over she complimented it too

he signed it!!!

we took a picture and it looked a million times better than the two other pictures i have with him so that’s great

anyways

i’m trying very pointedly to avoid saying anything about the actual show because i want people to be able to go in blind

because *i* did and it was amazing

and i’m so glad that the show i’m going to is going to be super different apparently so i’ll ALSO have no idea what to expect from that

also, for anyone curious, i’m going to asbury park/halloween show november 3rd (and im going as young ford pines, specifically that time in tbob when he was possessed by bill, so if you see that there, that’s me)

anyways

man take shot anytime i say anyways

you’ll be fuckin dead

i had a great night, it was a spectacular show, you’re all gonna love it when you see it

[worms-in-my-brain]

Having affective empathy deficits because you have ASPD and cognitive empathy deficits because you have autism is wild. Especially when you have a high need for cognition and a high cognitive capacity. It’s like constantly playing 4D chess.

Someone telling me a story about something I have zero personal experience with? I am SO useless. Usually I refer to past situations I’ve been in so I know how the other person might be feeling and what advice I would give but when I have 0 context and I’m already bad at cognitive empathy. And I can’t even relate to how they feel or ‘feel for them’ even if they directly tell me. It’s like idk what do you want me to say. That sure is a situation. Do fuck all for all I care. Except I can’t say that, because I know people are expected to care about that stuff… and on some level, if it’s a friend, I do care—but the barrier to my understanding is so huge that I end up only caring from a, like, theoretical standpoint. Like yeah in general if my friend gets hurt I care. But also. I have no emotions regarding how you respond to this specific situation. And then my ability to engage on the topic starts to slim down to frantic attempts to engage social scripts so that I don’t show what’s going on in my head.

It’s also insane because like. I always think that I have good cognitive empathy (for an autistic person) until the end of the day. And then I drop my mask and I realise how tired I am. Or when I’m at a social gathering for a while and I use so much energy I wind up practically hiding behind a friend so nobody talks to me. And then I realise that, yeah, I might be able to use it to function to some extent, but every time I do I’m using all of these mental functions that I barely even realise I’m using anymore that it just nukes me.

AuSPD is a pretty intense combo in that it really severely damages your ability to relate to other people. Especially when the impacts they have on your thoughts make it so that, often, your perspective is only understood by yourself. (Its why I enjoy online communities sm—somebody out there is BOUND to relate EVENTUALLY and I like seeing that I’m not alone).

[stillsolo]

🚩🚩

send me a 🚩 and i’ll share my unpopular rpc opinions and hot takes.  bonus points if you include a specific topic to talk about, like follower count, softblocking, graphics, etc.

wow, okay!  this took me a lot longer to answer than i would’ve thought. nobody sent in topics ( which is okay! ) but without direction, my laidback attitude about everything ended up hurting me in the long run lmfao   but now i’m here!!  better late than never, eh?  tagging others who also sent in something, mainly because i’ve realized i’m chill and got nothing more to say than this it seems  @fifthdimensicn @lightburnsyou @techniiciian ( thank you for sending something!! )

i’ll preface this by saying i have nothing against anyone.   i am just a massive childhood star wars nerd, who basically learned english through the canon/legends movies, games, books, and writing fanfic etc.   so, i’m rather well read on star wars and have a tendency to be uhhh. autistic lol  stringent, for want of a better word, about the universe lore.   overall, i don’t care whether or not people agree; this is just a topic i lowkey struggle to understand yet see far too often.   why people willingly step into this paradox is beyond me!

anyway, if your muse is canonically a force-null in star wars, yet you create a serious, fleshed-out jedi verse for them, then i can’t help but think you don’t actually love your muse as much as you think you do.

of course, you’re totally allowed to have fun—i am not against fun; i’m actually all for breaking and bending verses to my will—and i understand getting bored with the same verses you’ve played in for years and years.   but when this reinterpretation becomes a serious endeavor—like, you’re really out here recontextualizing the entirety of star wars, including its characters, regardless of how ooc it would be to do so, just to fit this verse??   that’s where you lose me lol

for clarity: force nulls are simply people who are not outwardly force-sensitive, aka an individual who cannot consciously sense or interact with the force.   so, think han solo, padmé amidala, or even captain rex and the clones etc.   these are people who stand tall without the force, relying instead on their resourcefulness, resilience, and humanity.

i know the arguments.    i’m well aware some would argue that han and padmé could be considered “lowkey force-sensitive” in their own way, and i’m actually very inclined to agree—to a point.   these two do exhibit qualities that some might attribute to a higher-than-average midichlorian count: padmé’s marksmanship and her negotiation skills; han’s brilliant piloting and uncanny luck that often defies logic.   but yeah, that’s also the whole damn point—they’re exceptional because they lack the force, not in spite of it.

here, lemme use padm�� as my primary example because i already know the concept of han being a jedi sounds absolutely absurd lol ( or at least it should if you know him at all 💀 )

let’s imagine a world where padmé is suddenly a jedi, wielding the force with all the grace of a trained knight.   it’s a pretty popular verse i’ve mostly seen outside of rp—and it’s utterly baffling to me.   sure, it’s an interesting twist, but it’s also a strange one.   why?  well, in my honest opinion: in making padmé overtly force-sensitive, you strip away everything that makes her outstanding.

she is extraordinary precisely because she isn’t outwardly force sensitive.  her ability to connect with people, her unparalleled empathy, and her deftness at negotiation are what sets her apart.  outward force sensitivity would rob her of these defining traits and generally diminishes her skillset—because the ability to sense emotions, to read others with an almost prescient understanding—is not a unique power, but rather one of the many force-given gifts jedi possess.  if padmé could sense others’ thoughts, how would her talents at diplomacy and empathy stand out?  just like that, what once set her apart would be merely an extension of the jedi arsenal.

the same applies to han!  this is why i’ve never written a force-sensitive han solo and likely never will.   his disbelief and distrust in anything he can’t see or feel for himself is paramount to his disposition / mentality as a character.   in the movies, he’s your taste of hard cynicism; he’s introduced as a reality check right after luke and ben’s floaty nonsense about the force.   ya feel me?   han solo is remarkable not because he’s imbued with mystical powers, but because he doesn’t have them.   he survives, thrives, and outsmarts the galaxy without supernatural powers to lean on.   to make han force-sensitive would be to strip away the very core of his character.

all in all, these characters, these force nulls, are extraordinary because they don’t rely on the force.   they are exceptional in spite of it, and i don’t really understand why anyone would make a concerted effort to take that away from them.