#I’m joking please don’t take this seriously

[astrow1zar6]

Most to Least Favorite Moon Signs & Why

1. Pisces moons: ughhh I love me a good Pisces moon😩 you guys are so darn charming it’s ridiculous. I think this is my favorite because I’m a Pisces sun so we compliment eachother quite well. But these people are super considerate of others and their feeling. Whether it’s a boy or girl you guys are super in tuned with your emotions & they emotions of others around you which is why you guys are really good with your words and knowing how to make others feel comfortable around you. These people are also big hopeless romantics & if they have a crush on you just know you’ll be treated like a princess/ prince. They do not play when it comes to their partners fr. They can however be very distant people and you’ll not here from them for like weeks or months at a time (big escapists) but overall if they love you just know your getting well taken care of. Just big sweethearts.

2. Libra moons: another big sweetheart placement. These people are sooo good at making others feel special it’s impressive to me really. (My moons in Aries so the opposite effect Libra moons give intrigue me a lot). They are usually big people pleasers (sometimes to a fault) but they usually are amazing conversationalists and can make you feel like you are the most interesting person in the room and are usually super engaging. Has the ability to keep very peaceful healthy relationships with others ( which as a chaotic Aries moon is super impressive to me💀). They live and breathe romance which I think is super cute. And may I say these people are usually always SO PRETTY just so aesthetically pleasing to look at and are always well dressed. The only thing that can bother me about them is they can be a little overly flirtatious which can be an issue if you’re into them & can say a lot of little white lies to make others feel comfortable. But overall they try really hard to make sure the people around them feel loved which I appreciate a lot. Genuinely nice people.

3. Sagittarius moons: just a big ball of sunshine. It’s pretty rare to see these people in a grumpy or shitty mood. They try really hard to spread “ good vibes” to others and try not to let their emotional drama get in the way of them or others having a good time. These are the best people to go to bars/ parties with. They are big goofballs that love to laugh and make others laugh as well. Can have a very loud laugh as well. Their laughs can be really funny too, you ever met someone whose laugh is usually funnier than the joke being said??? Yeah they’re those people🤣 the only thing I don’t like about this moon sign is that they can be a little too obsessed with positive vibes that they can kinda dismiss other’s emotions which can come off as a little insensitive sometimes.. they can treat others a little weird if they aren’t positive and happy all the time. They can also find it awkward to show negative emotions themselves which is why it can be hard for people to take them seriously at times. It’s okay to be down every once in an awhile you can’t always be upbeat 24/7.

4. Aquarius moons: these people are such weirdos I absolutely love it lol. They have such a unique way of expressing themselves whether that be their music taste, clothing, hairstyles, mindset ect. These people are the definition of authentic. I meet a lot of trendsetters that have this moon placement as well they are super creative and original which can cause a lot of people to copy their style a lot. They are usually super open minded and are really accepting of people from all different walks of life which I find so beautiful. It’s very rare you see them discriminate against anyone (mainly because they know how it feels to be outcasted by others). They are usually friends with other really authentic people whether it be artists, alternative people, rejects, outcasts ect. They can however be very weird when it comes to expressing emotions or others expressing emotions. They can almost be a little mean when people get too emotional around them I notice. Similar to Sag moons they can come off as a little insensitive to others that just need a shoulder to cry on. I think this comes from their need to logically solve emotions ( cuz this is an air moon after all) they can be more worried about solving/ finding solutions to your problems then just allowing you to vent which can rub others the wrong way at times. Overall though very cool quirky people who are way ahead of their time.

5. Cancer moons: are usually super sweet and genuine souls. Every cancer moon I met gives a sorta caretaker vibe to them that i absolutely adore. They’re just people that you want to naturally protect at all costs. Are usually veryyy nice to others as well almost to a scary degree. I notice however I tend to butt heads with this moon sign over the long run. These people can be very self defensive and can take things to heart wayyy to easily ( i think because of my Aries moon I can come off as harsher when I mess around and most I met DO NOT like that) it can be very hard to joke around with these people because of their sensitive personalities they can turn something that was meant to be light hearted into a big lecture of how that was insensitive and unacceptable. They definitely give off mom vibes. They also tend to lack ambition at times I notice and can prefer to be taken care of instead of striving to be better (they prefer comfort over trying new things at times which can be a little stressful if you are a more spontaneous type of person. But I notice this is also a big beauty aspect as well and people with this placement are usually so beautiful to look at (ESPECIALLY THE WOMEN OMG). Normally big homebodies and are really into at home activities such as cooking, watching Netflix, playing board games ect. They can however be super moody if u catch them on a wrong day😭 they will really crash out on you over very minor things sometimes. But overall they are very good natured and are very emotionally intelligent.. it’s honestly crazy how emotionally intelligent these people are they are made to be therapists forreal. They just always have the right words/actions when you are feeling down or upset which is very commendable imo. They know how to make others feel safe expressing themselves with no judgement ♥️

6. Gemini moons: these people are such comedians lol. Usually this moon sign is one of the popular girls/ guys in hs/ middle school. They give big class clown energy and can make anyone laugh. They have a very childlike sense of humor. It can be however difficult to take these people seriously because they can come off as a bit childish with the ways they express themselves but they usually don’t mean any harm by this. One of the best conversations I ever had was with these people. They can change any awkward conversation into something interesting and I thank god for them for this😩. I always however found it very difficult to get close to these people due to the lack of seriousness they have and their very flighty natures. I notice they talk to everyone but it’s very rare they get actually close close to people??? Like they’ll have so many friends that honestly barely know anything about them. They kinda bread crumb their personality at times. Also they can change their personality wayyyy to much for my liking, their opinions, likes and dislikes are so easily changeable based on who they are around which is why it’s hard to really pin these people down. This quality can give a bit of a “two faced quality” to their nature. They can be very all over the place.

7. Taurus moon: I know this might be a shocker cuz I feel like most people really like this moon sign and don’t get me wrong I do like this moon sign but they have this bossiness about them that can be just too much at times for me. I haven’t met a lot of people with this moon sign but the ones I have met have this controlling nature to them that can be a little unsettling at times. I always felt super judged when im around someone with this moon sign I have no idea why. These people are very big “my way or they highway types”. And in general I do find them to be a little boring at times. The ones I met literally only talk about work 24/7 lol their conversations are usually super predictable which can come off as a little dull. However on a more positive note these people are soooo attractive. Like they really know how to sweet talk their way into anyones good side. This is why a lot of big bosses usually have a Taurus moon. They are also amazing a making money their natural boss energy usually attracts so much wealth into their life which is super enviable!! Their romantic relationships as well are usually super stable and loving as well (thanks to the help of Venus). Their love languages usually involve gift giving and physical affection. These people are the BEST cuddles by far. Growing up you could’ve been known for your hugs and cuddles 🥺 they are also super dependable if they love you you won’t have to ever worry about if they’ll come thru for you or not THEY WILL. These people are not flighty in the slightest and will really ride for you. This is why they tend to have such stable healthy relationships in their lives.

8. Capricorn moons: ahhh cap moons, I tend to have a very strong love hate relationship with this moon sign usually. Imma start with the positives by saying that these people really RIDE for you when they love you. These are the types to make sure you get to where you need to be whether that be to work, or an important meeting or appointment or event. They will make sure you are well fed and have clothes on your back. Materially & practically these people will have you COVERED which is very commendable. However emotionally is where they tend to fall short. They can have a very insensitive nature about them that usually always rubs me the wrong way. I notice they can be very judgmental to those who aren’t as efficient as them and can make others feel pretty bad about things they can’t control. Most cap moons had to grow up very fast at a very young age so a lot know how to do things that most people don’t really learn until much older. But because of this they can almost make you feel a little bad if you don’t know how to do those things from what I’ve experienced. I also always felt like I couldn’t completely open myself up emotionally to these people without feeling like my emotions are almost dismissed in a way. They can be VERY dismissive emotionally (usually because they experienced this so much growning up) could believe in a more tough love kinda outlook. Overall tho these are the type of people that will give the clothes off their back to make sure that you are good and I love that about them.

9. Virgo moons: ugh these people are always giving unsolicited advice that no one asked for lol. Most earth moons tend to have a very judgey nature about them but I feel like Virgo moons definitely take the cake for the most judgmental outta all the moon signs. Ik that most of their advice is there to help but it can come off as super mean when it’s excessive. Ive experienced these people trying to correct your behavior on EVERYTHING to an almost irritating degree. They have a strong belief on what’s acceptable and unacceptable and they tend to project these beliefs on others to a fault. They can be overly nit picky with others (which is usually a projection because they are truly more hard on themselves than others tbh) but it’s okay to just let people be without correction so you don’t cause anyone any insecurity. On a more positive note however they are very helpful to the ones they love and their love language usually involves acts of service. They will go grocery shopping for you if you can’t or help clean around the house when you are feeling depressed or down or help wash your hair if you can’t find motivation to do it yourself. These people really do have hearts of gold they just need to beware of their delivery when trying to “help” others a little too much.

10. Aries moon: certified crashouts of the moon signs. These people can be so emotionally immature it’s ridiculous (ik cuz this is my moon sign and lord knows we are not easy to deal with🤣). Aries moons can be very big babies when they react getting their way emotionally. Their impulsive natures can burn a lot of bridges that really didn’t need to be burned. When they aren’t getting their way they can be super mean to those around them which can cause a lot of people to keep their distance from them a lot to avoid these crash outs. On a brighter side when they are in a good mood everyone is brought along for the ride. They can be super generous and absolutely HILARIOUS when in a good mood. This is honestly one of the funnest placements to be around because they are such dare devils and are always down for whatever whenever. But you never know when their moods are gonna switch on you which can be very scary at times…

11. Leo moons: speaking of babies… these folks definitely take the cake for the spoiled brats of the moon signs. Similar to Aries moon when they don’t get their way they have a very dramatic extravagant way of expressing their dislike toward whatever you did to them. These people can have very BIG egos that can be extremely fragile. So when their ego is challenged in any way they can definitely give you hell for it whether it be throwing things, loud temper tantrums ect. They have a hard time expressing themselves in a calm manner when their emotions get in the way which can stir up a lot of drama in their relationships. Their childlike way of dealing with emotions can be a HANDFUL. However these people genuinely do have really big hearts and they don’t mean to come off as dramatic as they do they just experience emotions very intensely. And just like Aries their emotions can turn on & off very fast. They usually aren’t the types to hold a grudge so just let them be dramatic first and then try to have a logical conversation with them. But logic is not really their first language.. most of their emotions are very heart centered & personal making it harder for them to control at times which can be stressful to deal with if you are the other party. (Fire moons however I notice deal with it the best).

12. Scorpio moons: last but not least the secretive ms Scorpio moon.. I put these people as my least favorite moon sign because of how secretive they are with their emotions. I notice a lot tend to shy away from vulnerability altogether (usually due to trauma) but it makes it super hard to understand where these people are coming from most of the time. These people are some of the most confusing individuals to figure out emotionally which can drive their loved ones crazy trying to get out breadcrumbs out these people. Their inability to open up can make others believe everything is okay with them until they start plotting on you cuz deep down you did hurt their feelings they just don’t want to tell you, so I notice a lot tend to play a lot of manipulation mind games to get back at those that hurt them (even if the other party had no idea they hurt them or not because of their lack of opening up). These people hold onto intense emotions that they don’t tell you about which can be SCARY… cuz you never know if they have it out for you or not cuz they will usually have this very calm and collected facade until the Scorpio stinger comes out and stings you out of nowhere. This leaves a lot of people in your life to be very confused by this. I notice with Scorpio moons there’s always this lack of communication or they don’t feel the need to tell you what you did wrong so you can properly fix the issue. This can cause you to burn a lot of bridges that could’ve been great in your life:( on the other hand when they do eventually trust you they can be some of the most loyalist people in your corner and can show you such a sweet side that most haven’t seen (if they show you this side YOU ARE IN! because it is super rare to get this side out of them). Deep down they are really sensitive sweet souls it just takes the hands of god to get to that point.

Hey guys I notice on my posts a lot of people have been upset with a lot of my work saying how it’s not “accurate” for them & I want to make it clear to everyone that not all my observations will resonate with everyone! I am not a licensed astrologist by any means I started this blog more for fun because I love astrology & have many opinions on the topic. I just so happened to gain a huge following on this very randomly from some of my posts so when I make a not so positive observation on a placement plz don’t take it to heart this is MY experience and I do this for fun during my free time. If anything I say bothers you feel free to unfollow instead of leaving nasty comments & any polite comments correcting my work I will take into account because I do value growth on my page🫶🏽🫶🏽 but thank you to everyone who still values my work and says positive things I love you guys & thank you for making this blog fun🩵

[henneseyhoe]

Just One More | 💭

Lewis Hamilton x BLACK!FEM!Reader

WARNINGS: Mentions Of Sexual Activity, Pregnancy, Dad!Lewis, Humor, Fluff

SUMMARY: Anotha one(a baby! yaaay!)

***A/N DISCLAIMER 💌- this is !!!NOT!!! apart of the official Just One More AU, i just thought it was a silly idea to write the fans reacting if he got you pregnant AGAIN 😭 dw, id never torture yall with five kids <333***

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Y/NUSERNAME

Liked by essence and 986,862 others

Back from 🇺🇸…with souvenirs🩷 lewishamilton

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USER1 WHAT??? OMG

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

USER2 again????

USER3 ARE YOU NOT TIRED???

USER4 I CALLED IT 😭😭😭

f1 Was itching for this announcement! See them in about 17 years maybe? 🫣🤭🍼

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

USER5 planning for a baby that isn’t here yet ain’t crazy??? 😭

USER6 F1 having a contract ready for a fetus was not on my 2025 bingo card?

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

USER7 (user6) how come? they did it for a few drivers racing now 😅😂

USER8 oh they get doooown 😭

USER9 LEWIS PLEASE GET OFF OF HER MY GOD

USER10 SERIOUSLY LIKE I PROMISE SHES NOT GOING NO WHERE LET HER GO 😭

USER11 this is why she takes so long to restock the website. too busy HUNCHING 😒

ynusername hunching?????? 😭😭😭

USER12 last time she was pregnant we didn’t get that tour…🥲

USER13 mind you this is the LAST time you sabotages us 😐🫵🏽 (lewishamilton)

USER14 Please tell me this is for a late halloween costume

ynusername yeah, i’m going as me when im pregnant 🙂

USER14 (ynusername) Y/N do not play with us right now..

lewishamilton legacy 💪🏾🧑‍🧑‍🧒‍🧒💜💛

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

USER15 YOU ALREADY HAD A LEGACY. FOUR OF THEM. YOU ARE SO INCONSIDERATE!!!

USER16 this is the greed they talk about in the bible, Lewis…

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

USER17 Omggg another little Hamilton 🥹

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

YBFF ANSWER THE PHONE Y/N???? 😭

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

YBSF bye i should have known when you didn’t wanna hang 😪😫💛

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

USER18 No you should have known when she was out here dressing like big pun in them 7x ass clothes

ynusername (user18) Yooo 😭😭😭

USER19 You guys just finding out, meanwhile me and my husband saw her at the superbowl yesterday night. She even waved😅

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

ynusername Thanks for keeping a secret! 😘💚🦅

USER20 and you didn’t snitch??? better than me

USER21 (user20) It wasn’t my place 🤷🏻‍♂️

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

USER22 Lewis and Giannis going baby for baby this year

USER23 Lewis is winning I fear!

essence Mama Y/N takes no breaks! And neither does Lewis we see 👀🤭

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

ynusername Essence…🥴🤭

USER24 HOW GREEEEEDY 😭

USER25 Soooo is there going to be a restock for the merch or does this stop it—

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

ynusername catch the restock Tuesday! Pregnancy only stops one thing and that’s me from seeing my feet 😭🩷

gq We knew first 😜

❤︎ ʙʏ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ

ynusername 🤭

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“Your fans are plotting on ripping my head off, do you see what they’re saying on twitter?!”

Lewis exclaimed and turned his phone to you, scrolling down his new notifications. You shift under the beds sheets to look at the screen, squinting slightly to read. The replies were filled with shock, as you expected, and some jokes here and there, but mostly shock. You cackle, your plump belly bouncing with every laugh.

“I can’t do anything about that! I told you if you got me pregnant again, I’d hurt you, but it looks like they’re wanting to do my dirty work”

You took the phone from his hands and cuddled up to his side as he covers the both of you with the beds duvet.

He scoffs. “Don’t act like you didn’t ask for it” Tucking his head beneath yours, he bites your neck, making you tuck your chin with a giggle.

“Shut up! That was in the moment…plus, you asked me to say it”

He hums and shakes his head, remembering the night you two conceived completely different than you.

“Nah. I don’t remember asking you to say you wanted another one of my kids. Actually, I remember what you said word for word if you want me to recite it” He mischievously clears his throat, but your hand had already made it’s way over his mouth to shut him up before he even started.

“If you say anything and my babies hear, it’s gonna be me and you” You threatened, Lewis’s eyes crinkling at the sides as he smiles widely underneath your hand.

Suddenly you felt your palm being wet, your instinct being to move. “EW! YOU LICKED ME!”

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💌—another reminder that this is NOT APART OF THE ACTUAL AU!! it’s just something cute i wanted to write as a scenario.

[maroonshirt81]

omggg what about a carcar cruise au?? Like they meet on the boat 😭🫶

thank you for the great request <3

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carcar, 2k words, rated m for language

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When Carlos arrived at his McLarenCruise luxury suite, his luggage was already waiting for him on the bed, next to a young man in a bright orange uniform, who was standing there with his hands folded behind his back. As soon as the door fell shut behind Carlos, the man started to speak like a robot who’d been waiting for its activation command.

“Welcome to your private luxury suite aboard McLarenCruise, where your comfort is our priority,” he drawled in what Carlos guessed to be an Australian accent. “I am Oscar, your personal steward, and I’m here to assist with anything you may need during your voyage.”

“Hello, Oscar,” Carlos said, flashing him a cheeky grin. “What if I need a little more enthusiasm?”

“I’m afraid that is not a service provided by the McLarenCruise stewards' crew,” Oscar prattled on, if possible even more monotone than before. “If you are unsure of how to make use of the steward appointed to you, I can print out a list of appropriate requests. It includes things like unpacking and storing your luggage, stocking your suite with toiletries and other amenities, and delivering room service.”

“Relax, Oscar.” Carlos laughed, plopping down on the bed. “I was only joking. Don’t act like I asked you to take off your pants.”

“I can also print out a list of actions that aren’t appropriate,” Oscar said. “It includes sitting on the bed while joking about your steward taking off his pants.”

Carlos’s mouth dropped open to tell him that he would never, in a million years, ask someone like Oscar to take off his pants, because… well—have you seen Carlos? But he realized in time that the inappropriateness of such a reply was probably even worse than the joke had been to begin with, so he said nothing.

Oscar seemed to take this as his dismissal. He nodded, as if he had provided exceptional service, and then left the suite before Carlos could ask him to unpack his luggage.

****

“Hello, Oscar,” Carlos tried again once evening came around. He had ordered a Risotto al Tartufo Bianco over the comm and then spent 20 minutes checking his hair in the mirror to make sure his charm was turned up to eleven.

He wasn’t the type to treat service staff poorly. In fact, he prided himself on being well-liked by all his subordinates—whether at his own firm, in restaurants, or within his household. He could crack a slightly grumpy Australian, no problem.

“Good evening, sir,” Oscar replied as he wheeled the cart into the suite. “Will you be eating at the table by the window?”

“Yes, please,” Carlos said, following behind to watch Oscar set the dishes on the smaller table in the suite. He looked a little out of place, with his bright orange cap, bright orange polo shirt, black shorts, and white tennis socks, serving a $100 dish to a high-end luxury suite.

“The cruise company forces you to wear this outfit, or is it a personal choice?” Carlos asked as he sat down in the chair Oscar had pulled out for him. He made sure Oscar saw his bright grin and knew that he was joking this time.

But Oscar didn’t laugh. Instead, he heaved a slightly disappointed sigh.

“Please, sir. I know this is a famously hard lesson to learn for old white men. But it is never appropriate to comment on the outfits of people in your service. Please reconsider letting me print out that list for you.”

Carlos was reeling.

Had this guy seriously just called him an old white man? He was thirty!

He must have been reeling for a moment too long because, once again, Oscar nodded at him as if he had just been dismissed after doing an amazing job and left without looking back. He hadn’t even poured Carlos a glass of wine.

And Carlos desperately needed it now.

****

“Hello, Oscar,” Carlos said the next morning, upon opening the door to what he first mistook for a wandering corpse. He had not bothered with trying to be charming today, but the even pastier-than-usual color of Oscar’s round, unremarkable face made him soften a little. “Are you seasick?”

“No, just sick of this job,” Oscar mumbled, barely audible. “What could you possibly want at six in the morning?”

Carlos arched his eyebrows high, surprised by the sudden lack of robot-like professional speech.

“You were asleep?”

“What gave it away?” Oscar asked. There were pillow lines etched into his cheeks, highlighting the truly terrible, blotchy stubble vegetating between the acne scars. Carlos didn’t point that out, though, since the question had clearly been rhetorical anyway.

Despite looking like he had just rolled out of bed, Oscar was wearing his trusty orange hat and orange polo.

“Do you just sleep in these clothes?” Carlos blurted, remembering Oscar’s lecture about outfit comments too late.

Predictably, Oscar started, “I get that at your age, memory might begin to fail, but—”

Carlos threw the door in his face.

Fuck it. He could find the early morning spin class by himself.

****

Oscar continued to be the most infuriating, judgmental, and frankly useless service personnel Carlos had ever dealt with. The charm offensive was not working, just like Oscar’s eyes, apparently, because he kept insinuating Carlos was some geriatric creep with a power kink. All week, he made Carlos feel like the biggest asshole who ever lived, hinting again and again at printing out a list of appropriate and inappropriate behavior toward his luxury cruise stewards.

Carlos even started to have nightmares about a monster with an orange for a head and unblinking, dead eyes, accusing him of wanting to fuck it.

And yet. 

And yet, when he was lounging on a sun chair on the deck by the pool one afternoon, sending a request for a hopefully spit-less cocktail to be delivered to him, he felt an odd pang of disappointment when a different, much more chipper-looking orange-capped young man appeared to deliver it to him.

“Where’s Oscar?” he asked.

“Oh, he has the afternoon off,” the guy informed him, somehow managing to directly answer his question without implying Carlos was a sick freak who should be arrested for indecent behavior.

“I see,” Carlos said.

“I’ll be at your beck and call until he’s back, sir,” the chipper guy said cheerfully. After a week of Oscar’s flat stare, this guy’s energy felt borderline manic.

“That’s fine, I won’t be needing you again,” Carlos sighed, waving him away.

Damn. He had come on this trip to wind down from his stressful job, maybe have a little summer fling with a hot twink—not to be haunted by a prickly, orange steward.

Letting his eyes wander over the various people surrounding the pool dressed only in the tiniest swimwear possible, he found himself utterly uninterested in any kind of fling. Until…

Until a soft, high giggle caught his ear from a few deckchairs away, where a group of young men were gathered, towels wrapped around their hips or draped over their shoulders.

Carlos immediately perked up. Now that was the kind of laugh he would like to elicit from someone. Honest and unguarded, as if they weren’t used to it but just couldn’t help their good mood in his presence.

Glancing past the various people obstructing his view, Carlos finally found the source of that special giggle, and felt like the air got punched out of his chest for a second.

Because standing there was a guy who could only be an actual, honest-to-God prince. Light brown hair with almost reddish highlights from the sun, falling over his forehead in the most perfect, gravity-defying curl. Crinkly eyes, pale skin with rosy cheeks and a fine peppering of moles spread across his whole body. He was obviously fit, but not in the kind of anabolically enhanced bodybuilder way. His arms had a nice shape to them, as he stood in a cute little pose, hand on his hips, accentuating a tiny waist. And outlined by a wet pair of black shorts was the most perfectly round, biteable ass Carlos had ever seen.

Now that was a guy Carlos would ask to take his pants off!

He kept observing the guy, waiting for the right moment to make his move, and the instant the prince sank into one of the free deckchairs while his friends wandered off toward the pool or the bar, he seized his chance.

Leaving his untouched cocktail behind, Carlos grabbed his bottle of sunscreen instead, master plan already forming in his head.

The guy was lying on his stomach when Carlos reached him, wet drops of water glittering compellingly on his back, face hidden in the nook of his elbow.

Carlos cleared his throat twice before the pretty guy turned his head, blinking one eye open.

“Sorry,” Carlos said, all casual-like. “I noticed your back is starting to be a little red.” Showing off his bottle of sunscreen, he added, “Do you want some of this?”

The guy just stared at him, until Carlos started to sweat a little.

“I could… ah… I could put it on, if you want?”

Finally, the beautiful man pushed himself up on his elbows, his brows furrowing in mild irritation.

And then.

And then he started to speak.

In a very familiar, incredibly judgmental Australian drawl.

“Top subject on the list of inappropriate interactions with your stewards,” he said. “Has to be approaching them on their afternoon off and offering to rub sunscreen all over their body!”

Carlos dropped his bottle of sunscreen without even noticing.

“Oscar?” he croaked, eyes snapping open so wide, he felt they were in danger of rolling right out of their sockets.

“Yes?” Oscar said, as if it was incredibly obvious that this… this God of a man was the same sickly pale steward who kept pestering Carlos’s every waking and sleeping moment with his thinly-veiled insults and scathing remarks. The same orange little traffic light figure. The same bad-mannered human Cheeto who complained about being woken up too early up to eleven o’clock, despite being tasked with bringing Carlos his breakfast.

Carlos turned around, not bothering to pick up his sunscreen, and launched himself right into the pool.

Because that was the closest he came to throwing himself overboard the ship.

****

He was surprised to actually find Oscar by the door come dinner time, wearing the same orange cap and polo and unimpressed expression as always. Carlos had almost expected to be permanently switched to the borderline-manic guy.

“Hello, Oscar,” Carlos said contritely, and stepped away to let him wheel in his little cart.

“Spaghetti Carbonara—the classic Italian version, per your request,” Oscar narrated, as he put down the dishes on the little table by the window. Carlos noticed the additional plate with a cloche over it, hiding its content, before Oscar even pointed it out.

“There’s a special little something for dessert under there. On the house. Bon appétit!”

And with that, he left, once again without pouring Carlos any wine.

Carlos waited until the door had fallen shut behind him, then lunged for the cloche, lifting it up.

As he had expected, there wasn’t actually any dessert under there.

Instead, it was a piece of paper.

Carlos took it and read through it, groaning louder the further he read.

Once he was done, he balled the piece of paper up and threw it across the room. Then he went over to the comm and dialed the steward’s office.

“Mr. Sainz! How can we help you?” a female voice asked from the other side.

“I have a message to leave for Oscar, please. Do you have something for writing?”

“Sure,” the woman said. “Go on.”

“Please write down: Carlos Sainz, 055-8155…”

****

[atomsminecraft]

You feel like a 6A to me

My grades say otherwise /j

(I’m joking they’re ok)

[clownsuu]

Holy cow there’re a lot and I really do mean A LOT of Welcome Home AUs, and more coming too. Not saying it’s a bad thing, but it makes sense considering WH doesn’t have a lot to work with so it leaves tons of room for fans to play around with. I just hope it doesn’t get outta hand like what happened to Undertale with its AUs.

People are free to have creative liberty on what aus they wanna make- like you said there is very little canon content to munch on so people will pull a “fine I’ll do it myself” JCHFHDHU-

I personally don’t mind it as well, but I do enjoy the aus where they purposely change Wally’s height just to make him more simp-able LMAOO

[winn-wynn]

Foodcourt Au !!! (Magic Modern Times)

w/ Percy, Oliver, Marcus, Penelope, and Audrey

to start it off it’s the summer before college. They all need jobs to tie them over before school officially starts

Percy works at Smoothie Paradise. He’d be really good at memorizing the recipes. Usually the only one on shift because it doesn’t get that busy. Has fought with a Karen at least once per shift. Has tons of overtime. He needs the money. Manager has talked to him at least for it but at this point lets him have his overtime. Percy is his only regular full time employee.

Penelope works at Cinnabon. She’s really extroverted and friendly with customers. Is very fast and efficient. Always on cashier. Is also the caller to shout out customers names because she has the loudest voice.

Oliver works at Auntie Anne’s. BELIEVES HIS PRETZELS ARE SUPERIOR!!! Runs his little store like a quidditch team. Fast and efficient. Will win. Believes in teamwork but will kick your ass if you’re slacking. Works very fast. Has the pretzel shapes engrained in his mind and hands. Can do it in sleep.

Marcus works at Wetzel’s Pretzels. HIS PRETZELS ARE SUPERIOR OLIVER!!! Works in the back, mostly is the one shaping and baking pretzels. Do not put him on cashier he has no patience. Probably has threatened to kick out customers out at least once per shift.

Audrey works at Panda Express. She loves cooking the back. She does not want to talk to customers. Will do it begrudgingly though. Half -Chinese, so she makes jokes at least once that she’s working for her people even though Panda Express is not authentic. (It’s really Chinese American.) She always cleans as she goes. Refuses to do overtime because of dishes or cleaning the floor. Will get out on time. She will make sure of it.

NOW FOR THE FUN STUFF

They all met on accident because they were closing shifts. They all had a similar break time and sat at the food court tables to eat.

Percy knew Oliver from school so they were eating together. Penelope just plopped herself down and declared she was going to be friends with them because she’s seen them around school. Percy and Oliver just let it happened. They were to shocked. Percy didn’t mind. Oliver was like bombastic side eyes. Penny won Oliver over by her knowledge of quidditch.

Penelope brought Audrey over. They were friends before. Funnily enough Audrey brought Marcus over because she likes drama. She just thought Oliver and Marcus has a lot in common.

Oliver and Marcus were Not Happy TM. They fought like cats and dogs. They growled at each other once. Percy was not amused. He locked them in a janitors closet and said to sort it out.

They did it eventually. They’re still rivals and agreed to a truce. They still fight though.

Obviously, Oliver and Marcus are rivals. They work at different pretzels shops. They go over and fight each other at their place at least twice per shift. Percy is unfortunately stationed next to them and has to stop their fights. Penelope is across from them and watches while eating her cinnamon rolls. Audrey watches exasperated but she can’t say shit because her and Penny bet on when Percy will snap or who will win the fight.

That’s all I have for now. Tell me if you want more !!!

Also in case you don’t read tags, which fair I write goddamn essays, im Chinese. So please don’t take the Panda Express joke too seriously. I make that joke everytime I eat there.

[riveluart]

Queer fairy headcanons for pride This is just some fun doodles and headcanons my brain chose when rotating fairies around in my head

Ko-Fi Commissions are open!

[marsdeathdefiances]

Petition to rename ‘The Odyssey’ to ‘Are You There Gods? It’s me, Odysseus’

[alohaasaloevera]

can someone make an edit of klance fighting and then it flawlessly transitions to that one video of Steven Yeun wearing a maid dress in Jeremy Shada’s lap???

[ocdhuacheng]

When you say “we’re about to witness homosexuality on the big screen” you are talking about akiangel I am talking about denreze we are not the same

[devilsrecreation]

People are like “Mordetwi this” and “Mordetwi that” when Eeyore x Twilight Sparkle is RIGHT THERE

[chrismissing]

People get mad that Joshua Graham is racist.

Like bro knew Vegas was racist without him there is literally a perk that’s weaponizes racism.

(This is a joke)

Anyways daily Fallout Fanart

Artist: amyoy

DeviantArt: https://www.deviantart.com/amyoy/gallery

[applecidersstuff]

You know how first season went with “it starts, and ends, in the garden”? And how we all are afraid that in the end they both can become human or die?

So if they would die, I hope not, what if they’re beried in a garden?

So their love would start and end in the garden….

[devil-stumph]

Are you a lesbian? Are you also obsessed with that old man from fall out boy? Oh boy what are the chances of that?! Here’s a flag for all you Patrick Stump lesbians in the world ✨ you keep it spinning 🧡

The oranges are from the sunset flag but mostly kept because Patrick has said orange is his favourite colour (a fact i am so normal about as a fellow orange lover) and the blue is taken from his lesbian fashion sense… I mean denim jacket

[moonfurthetemmie]

The “My vampire friend needs to eat. Consider donating blood for their dinner.” sign in the front of our vampire-feeding blood drive stand is raising a lot of questions already answered by the sign

[thedeerman]

being rapid-cycling bipolar means that i can’t sleep at night because i’m hypomanic but then cry my eyes out because the order i made for the steam deck i’ve been waiting to get for years got cancelled and now i’ll have to pay full price because my company just stopped having them out of nowhere. thanks, obama