#I’m in the middle of a school day but I had to get this out my head
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kiszjuli · 3 days ago
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YOU WIN .ᐟ
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✸ varsity!jaemin x fem!reader | genre. fluff. | w.c. 2.1k | ♡
↳ synopsis. in which jaemin has been pining after you and makes you a deal. if he wins the valentine’s day basketball game, you have to go out with him. you agreed, but you knew you didn’t like him like that. at least that’s what’s you’ve been telling yourself.
↳ playlist. pov - ariana grande. universe (let’s play ball) - nct dream. i wanna be yours - arctic monkeys call me baby - exo. talk saxy - riize. adore you - harry styles.
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the large, crowed gym boomed with the sounds of sneakers squeaking against polished floors and the faint echo of chatter and commentary bouncing off the walls. valentine’s day was tomorrow, and with it came the school’s annual basketball game—a game everyone seemed to love, whether it was purely for the game itself, or the romance that seemed to come with it. for you, though, it was just another day behind the camera, documenting the campus chaos for the yearbook.
through your camera, you’d captured just about everything this year: pep rallies, club meetings, quiet moments in the library, and even pictures of people doing the simplest things. and of course, na jaemin. somehow, he was everywhere. whether he was on the court, joking with friends, or flashing a charming grin at you, jaemin had an uncanny ability to find your camera—and you hated how often you found yourself keeping the photos he was in.
you’d spent the last semester convincing yourself it didn’t mean anything. he was just one of the many faces in the crowd, one of the players you documented out of habit. but jaemin thought very different.
about a week ago, he’d found you crouched on the sidelines during practice. you fiddled with your lens, as he walks up and proposed his idea to you. “if i win the valentine’s day game,” he’d said, leaning casually against the bleachers, and looking down at you, “you have to go out with me.”
at that, you almost dropped your camera. “what?”
“come on, pretty girl, you heard me.” his grin had been infuriating, as always. before you could think to respond, he added, “i’m. a deal’s a deal.”
“and if you don’t?” you piped.
"i don't always win, but i promise you i will this time.” he responded with a confident tone.
the idea was ridiculous. you clearly didn’t even like jaemin like that—or at least, that’s what you’d been trying to convince yourself of.
although you found your heart beating a little quicker when he was around, eyes lighting up a bit when he walked in the same room, laughing slightly harder at his jokes-it was all meaningless. right?
so, motivated by your persistence to prove your subconscious wrong, you’d agreed and now, as the stands filled quickly with students, and your camera in your lap, you glanced around not being able to shake the feeling that this wasn’t going to end you you expected.
despite yourself, because of the infectious crowd, you felt the pre-game thrill in your chest. you adjusted some things on your camera, getting it ready for when you needed it. aiming it in front of you you changed some of the setting, while looking through the lens. then you had noticed that he was directly in the middle; staring your way. you lowered the camera, looking at him straight on. that stupid smirk and casually spun a basketball in his middle finger. show off. his coach called the team for a quick team talk, and of course he didn’t leave without throwing a wink at you.
you fought the urge to roll your eyes but couldn’t deny the small flutter you felt in your stomach.
the gym fell to a hush as the referee walked to the middle of the court, the basketball in hand. both teams on either of his sides, waiting in anticipation. you got your camera ready for the shot, eyes trained on the scene in front of you, but you felt the weight of someone else’s gaze.
jaemin.
he stood at the center, opposite the other team’s strongest member, his attitude relaxed but ready. something about his calm and confident demeanor told you that he already knew how the game would end. like he was playing with certainty, and not hope.
seconds later, the whistle blew, the ball was thrown into the air.
jaemin reacted instantly, leaping towards it. his body stretched effortlessly to the ball, fingers grazing it first—the perfect tip-off. just like that the gym erupted in cheers and the game begun.
from behind the camera, you followed the motions of the players. shoes squeaked against the polished wood, the sharp bounce of the ball echoed through the gym. jaemin was moving like he was made for this, weaving through players with an ease. his focus was intense, completely imo in the game, but every now and then his eyes would flicker to you.
they were subtle glances, quick enough that no else would would have caught it. but you did, and he knew that.
and you hated that your stomach flipped every time it happened.
later in the game, halfway into the second quarter, jaemin caught a pass near the three-point line, and without hesitation, he launched the ball toward the hoop. The form was perfect, the kind of shot that sent the crowd to their feet before it even touched the net. and of course, you got the perfect picture of him in action, feet lifted at least a foot off the ground.
the cheers that followed were deafening. jaemin didn’t celebrate, he didn’t even look surprised. he just turned on his heels and jogged back to defense with that same cocky smirk, and looked directly at you.
you lowered your camera, heartbeat hammering against your ribs.
the fourth quarter had rolled around, and the gym was like a madhouse. the scoreboard glowing with mirrored numbers. 76-76. the game had been the kind that had the entire crowd on the edge of their seats constantly. every dribble, every pass, every shoot felt like it carried the weight of the entire game. and at the center of it all—na jaemin.
but he was also exhausted. Sweat clung to his skin, dampening his hair. his cheeks were flushed, and his chest heaved.
the rest of the team was just as worn out, struggling to keep up as the opposing team tried to pushed harder, desperate to steal the lead. jaemin had been their anchor, but the slight lag in his step was noticeable.
and yet, every time he looked up at the stands to you, there was still that unwavering determination. almost as if it pushed him harder; to keep his drive high.
you weren’t sure how long you had been holding your breath when the game reached the final full minute. the rival team had the ball, moving with quick, calculated passes, trying to run down the clock. the team knew what they were aiming for—a last-second shot, the buzzer-beater that would end it all.
jaemin wasn’t about to let that happen.
in a fraction of a second, he darted forward, intercepting a pass with a speed that seemed impossible given how drained he had to be by now. the crowd gasped, watching with intense focus, defenders right on his heels. you didn’t even realize you were standing until your knees bumped against the scorer’s table, camera still clutched tightly in your hands.
the timer was ticking down—
ten seconds left.
he crossed the three-point line. his teammates shouted, signaling for a pass, but he didn’t even glance their way, focused on his own play.
seven seconds.
an opposing player lunged at him, trying to block him. failing, jaemin spun around him, keeping the ball in his possession.
four seconds.
he took the shot running out of time.
the ball left his fingertips, spiraling toward the hoop just as the final buzzer blared through the gym.
time seemed to slow, everyone’s heads following the ball.
the ball traced the rim once—twice—before finally sinking through the net.
the gym erupted with cheers and yells and claps.
the student section stormed the court, screams of victory bouncing off the walls. the team tackled jaemin in celebration, hands ruffling his hair, hitting him on the back, yelling his name.
but jaemin wasn’t paying attention to them.
his eyes were locked on yours, with an ‘i told you so’ look.
and you knew.
this wasn’t just a win, it was his win.
and you were his prize.
jaemin had done it. he’d won the game, meaning he’d also won the bet.
as you sat at the bottom of the bleachers, still surrounded but the buzzing nature of the gym, you weren’t sure scared you more—the fact that he actually pulled it off, or the fact that you secretly wanted him to.
but before you could process it any further, a familiar figure broke through the heavy crowd.
jaemin. hot, sweaty, completely breathless.
his jersey clung to his skin, strands of damp hair falling over his forehead, cheeks flushed even more. his eyes were sharp, focused and locked onto you. he didn’t stop until he was right in front of you
your breath caught in your throat.
jaemin tilted his head, a breathless grin tugging at his lips. “so…” he ran a hand through his damp hair, the pieces falling right back. his chest still rising and falling with heavy breaths. “about our little deal.”
you swallowed hard.
your mind scrambled trying to find an excuse, something to get out of this, but every word died before it could reach your tongue. the truth was, no matter how much you had tried to convince yourself otherwise, you wanted this. wanted him.
jaemin must have noticed the mix of hesitation in your expression because his smirk widened, a teasing glint in his eyes. he leaned in just enough for you to catch the faint scent of sweat and cologne, his voice dropping to something softer, more dangerous.
“you’re not gonna back out on me, are you, pretty girl?”
something about the way he said it, made your breath hitch. the way he looked at you. like he already knew he had won more than the game and bet. you couldn’t form a proper response.
“uh..”
jaemin let out a quiet chuckle, gaze flickering to your lips for a second before meeting your eyes again. “guess that means i’ll pick you up at seven.”
and just like that he turned around back to the court, leaving you standing there with your racing heart.
oh, you were screwed.
you weren’t nervous, definitely not.
at least, that’s what you kept telling yourself as you checked your reflection for what had to be the tenth time in the last five minutes. it wasn’t even a real date. just the result of a stupid bet.
and yet, here you were, doing your last touches.
a sharp knock on your dorm door made you jolt, heart leaping into your throat. you took a deep breath before opening it, only to find jaemin leaning casually against the frame, looking criminally hot.
his sweaty jersey and damp hair from earlier was gone, now replaced in a white tee, covered by a black jean jacket and matched black jeans. his usual charm fully present. his cologne was soft but warm, dangerously enticing. and they way he had that signature smirk, he knew exactly what you were thinking.
jaemin’s eyes raked over you, picking out every detail. he let out a low whistle, shaking his head. “damn,” he leaned in. little. “if i knew you’d clean up this nice, i would’ve made the bet a long time ago,”
you rolled your eyes trying to ignore the quickened pace of your heart. “are you gonna flirt all night or are we gonna leave?”
he chuckled, stepping from the doorframe, gesturing his arm out of the building. “both. definitely both.”
with a dramatic sigh, you stepped out and locked the door behind you. as you followed him to his car, you realized something—this felt like a real date. nothing forced, not awkward, not something you were being dragged into. interesting.
jaemin ended up taking you to a tucked away, late-night café, the kind with dim lighting and cozy booths. it was quieter than you expected, more intimate, which he probably planned.
as soon as you sat down in the booth, jaemin leaned forward, eyes fixed on you with that same infuriating smirk. “so, be honest,” he said, tapping his fingers against the table. “how long have you been secretly in love with me?”
his words caught you off guard. “excuse me?”
he grinned. “i mean, you did agree to this pretty quickly.”
you scoffed. “it was a bet.”
“sure.” he nodded slowly, like he wasn’t the one who came up with it. “and yet, here you are. looking beautiful, by the way,”
you rolled your eyes, ignoring the warmth creeping up your cheeks. “do you flirt with everyone like this?”
jaemin tilted his head, pretending to think. “only you.”
your stomach flipped, but you forced yourself to glare. “unbelievable.”
he laughed, leaning back. “better get used to it, pretty girl. you’re my valentine this year,” ‘and hopefully forever’ he thought to himself.
you smiled shaking your head.
the worst part? you weren’t even mad about it. in fact, you couldn’t form see yourself going out with him more than just tonight. maybe you did harbor some feelings for na jaemin after all..
⁀➷⊹ ࣪ ˖~ THE LA LA LOVE SERIES .ᐟ
taggies(open) ↳ @kittydollzz @huffnpufffckk @completelyjae @lovesuhng @nae-vm @ayibdorrt @chocoriki @yomaman @yukisroom97
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telephoniii · 10 hours ago
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HEARTSHAPED CHOCOLATES
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☆彡 in which you gift jamil a valentine and things get complicated
jamil viper x gn!reader
word counter: 3.1K
warnings: reader is prefect, possible ooc, miscommunication (kinda), descriptions of servitude
a/n: i wrote this at 2AM but i think it's really cute. i’m definitely biased because jamil is my favorite and i do NOT have any valentines this year whatsoever 😭
i hope you enjoy!! :>
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Jamil wiped down the counter with a frustrated sigh. Kalim had, once again, gone behind his word and threw a last-minute party. One that Jamil had to do a majority of the work for. And now here he was, cleaning up after the incompetent boy.
Nothing he wasn't used to, but upsetting nonetheless. Though, he supposed that he’d be lying to himself if he claimed it was the only reason he felt bitter. His eyes flickered toward a calendar that hung on the kitchen wall of Scarabia.
Tomorrow, it’d officially be Valentine's Day.
Now, most NRC students were as single as could be for a variety of reasons— being a celebrity, focusing on grades, etc. Jamil fell under the category of being too busy. So many, much more important matters were always fighting for his attention. And a lot of them are related to Kalim in some way or form.
Being a destined servant to the Al Asim household wasn't an ideal situation. Plain and simple. Especially when it came to romantic relationships.
In middle school, young Jamil had a few girls he was interested in. However, all hopes of those crushes blooming into anything more died when they witnessed Jamil and his family bowing down to Kalim.
It's difficult to explain his role to his peers. Of course, the older he got the easier it became. But for most of his childhood, it was extremely embarrassing to have to say that he was to devote his life to serving the Al Asim family forever.
It was humiliating, giving leeway for others his age to look down on him. Now it wasn't just Kalim who he was lesser than. It was everyone. And it was hardly fair. Jamil was smarter than all of them combined.
He caught on to things quickly and was easily adaptable. When learning magic, his movement was calculated and precise. Yet, because of his last name, the respect he deserved was never given… Needless to say, he never pursued any more crushes.
By the time he was enrolled in NRC, romance no longer seemed plausible for his lifestyle. He wouldn't be able to devote so much time to another person other than Kalim anyway. That man-child can barely do anything on his own to save his life.
Jamil was convinced he’d spend the rest of his youth alone, only really finding a potential partner once he was free from the chains of servitude.
…And then you showed up at NRC.
You and your stupid soft eyes; that genuine empathy you carried on your sleeve. It's idiotic, really. You were bound to get taken advantage of in a school like this. Against his better judgment, Jamil felt drawn to you.
Despite being magicless and from a whole other world, you seemed to understand and empathize with his struggles better than those he had grown up with. And you weren't just all bark, no bite. You helped out a lot.
Many can just say that they feel sorry for Jamil, yet stand idly by as he served Kalim. You, however, saw him through his overblot. Instead of moving on, you forced him to communicate with Kalim about how he was feeling. It would've been so easy to fall back into the status quo, yet you stayed and improved his life for the better.
He’ll never quite get how one person could leave such a big impact.
You eased his worries about servitude. Being around you was naturally calming. It didn't feel like he had to babysit when he spent time with you. In fact, he felt as though he was learning new things— about both himself and others— every day with you.
The feeling scared him to his soul.
It was terrifying to be this addicted to another person’s presence. He wasn't used to having someone to look forward to: someone he wanted to be around all the time.
Jamil didn't know whether or not to pursue you. The last thing he wanted was to drag you into more of his messes… however, you seemed to frequently do that yourself, choosing to be involved for his sake. He was truly infatuated.
Despite it all, he refused to make a move.
You weren't from this world and all too soon he was sure you’d find a way back to where you were meant to be. It’d be selfish of him to pursue you, trapping you in a place you didn't belong. He knows the feeling of being trapped all too well after all.
There were no telltale signs you’d be interested in him back anyway. You were friendly with all and close to many. Who’s to say one of those fancy princes or endearingly dumb freshmen isn’t the one who’s captured your heart?
He purposely doesn't stand out, unlike some other students. Jamil assumed this put him at a natural disadvantage.
Assumed being the keyword.
Of course you, always breaking his expectations, had to crumble his thoughts by gifting him chocolates.
~
“Jamil?”
His eyes moved from his textbook to you in a second. He raised a brow as he watched you stare at him with an unrecognizable glint in your eyes. “Did you need help with something, Prefect?”
Those words made you perk up, grounding you back in reality. “No! No. I’m fine. Just…”
Clearing your throat, you put down your pencil. The homework in front of you was long forgotten as you focused your attention mainly on Jamil— much to his confusion.
“Do… Do you have any plans for Valentine's Day?” You cautiously asked, looking at him intently.
He furrowed his brows at the question, thinking it over. “Kalim will most definitely want to throw a party for the occasion. I'll be in charge of the decorations, cooking, and— well, everything as per usual.”
Jamil answered truthfully, not seeing much of a reason not to. Yet, he felt like he answered wrong as his eyes met your deflated gaze.
“Got it… Yeah, that makes sense…”
Before he could invite you to the party— you’re one of the only people he’d happily cook for— you messily started scouring through your bag.
He observed you curiously, mentally noting that he should help you clean out your backpack sometime. I mean, the amount of loose papers you have in there is absurd—
“Here.”
His mind goes quiet as you pull out a small, heart-shaped box and slide it toward him. Jamil looks at you like you are crazy, making you chuckle.
“I was hoping to give it to you on Valentine's Day, if you're busy then, I’d rather do it now and save you the trouble.” How thoughtful of you… His shock was transparent as he struggled to form words.
You didn't know whether or not to take that positively or negatively.
“Uhh—” It was awkward, the air was tense as you swiftly stood up. You flashed him a nervous smile. “I should go check up on Grim… Good seeing you?”
Jamil had never felt more scatterbrained. So many thoughts racing at once. Yet so little came out of his mouth.
“Good seeing you too, Prefect.”
~
He never did invite you, did he?
Jamil sighs at his ridiculousness. In the back of his mind, he tried to justify it.
The party wouldn't be ideal for you to come to anyway, he’d be working the majority of the time. He doubts you’d enjoy yourself. It might be awkward for you to even come after that exchange.
However, deep down, he knew he should've said something. Anything. Instead, he just let you leave with unsure thoughts.
Jamil didn't want to leave this be. He wanted to make it right. But with so little time, he was stuck.
~
Valentines arrived unreasonably fast, causing him to frown. The students of Scarabia could sense something was wrong, but no one had the guts. Well, no one except…
“Jamil? Are you mad?” Kalim innocently asked.
Although you made Jamil talk out a lot of his issues with Kalim, the white-haired boy’s voice still irked him to his soul.
“No. What makes you say that?” The Viper responded, keeping his tone neutral and calm.
Nonetheless, Kalim squinted at him with a pout.
“Is this about the Prefect?”
He nearly choked on his spit. “Excuse me?”
“Well, you guys like each other, right? Did you fight over something? Aww, I’m sorry if an argument broke out right before Valentine's.”
Jamil shook his head with an annoyed scoff, giving Kalim an unamused look.
“No, what—? Rewind. What makes you think we like each other?”
Kalim tilted his head like a lost puppy. It only served to frustrate Jamil further.
“Is it not obvious? You’re way happier around them than anyone else!”
Not that anyone pointed it out, but Jamil would undoubtedly deny the way his cheeks heated up at that statement.
“We’re not seeing each other romantically. Neither do we think of one another that way…”
He regretted letting his sentence trail and thinking aloud. Whenever it came to you, he was much less organized than he liked.
“…Well, sort of.” Although he merely mumbled these three words, that was all it took for Kalim to spring up ecstatically.
“Oh! So you like them but you haven't confessed? You can do it at today's party! I’ll invite them right now!” “What! No— Kalim, slow down!”
Jamil had to physically grab the other hot by his shoulders to keep him from bouncing away.
“I'm not ‘confessing’ at this party today, or any time soon.”
That lost puppy looked returned to Kalim’s face. Although he had seen it a few minutes ago, it still pissed him off all the same.
“Why not?”
Because he didn't know how to; plain and simple. Jamil for sure didn't want to have his ‘confession’ be too big. He’d hate for himself to come off as ingenuine to you.
Not to mention, Kalim and his antics have more or less ruined any big, dramatic gestures for him. Jamil can't help but find them corny and tacky now.
However, he didn't want to do something too small. A simple note won’t cut it for him. You deserve more. What exactly that entailed, he didn't know.
“Because I don’t want to.” Jamil unenthusiastically answered. He cut off Kalim before he could speak up. “No more questions.”
Not wanting to entertain this conversation any longer, Jamil walked away. Right. He had other, more pressing matters to worry about. Party preparations.
Food, decorations, music, lighting…
Damn it, why won’t you leave his mind?
~
The party, thankfully, went smoothly. Guests were enjoying themselves, there was enough food for everyone, and Kalim was too distracted by a few people to bother him. Letting out a relieved sigh, Jamil leaned against the wall behind him. His eyes wandered around as he started people-watching.
It was important to stay alert when it came to the people at these parties. He had to make sure no one had harmful intentions towards the young Al Asim. Though, as he should've expected, there were many couples here tonight.
Seems like a lot of Scarabian students brought their off-campus lovers here. Jamil can only hope Crowley doesn't chastise them too harshly for doing so.
He perks up as a slow song plays over the party. The lights are adjusted to dim and soon enough, practically everyone was on the dance floor. Couples, friends, strangers, talking stages— you name it.
It’s no surprise Jamil seemed drawn to the dance aspect of this part of the night. Even if he tried to hide it at times, his passion for the art of dancing always had its way of shining through. He glanced through the crowd to see if there was anyone without a partner.
Thankfully for him, it wasn't too hard to spot someone. These types of parties were always bound to have a few wallflowers. As he made his way through the crowd toward the one he had his eye on, he couldn't help but hear a couple of voices over the music.
“Ace, you little—!” That was all Jamil could make out before he felt a person suddenly collide with him. It didn't hurt or anything, and Jamil had enough sense to gauge it was most likely a mistake—
“Uh, hi.”
He didn't expect to turn around and be met with the sight of you. An embarrassed look sat upon your face as you fidgeted with the ends of your clothes.
“Hey.” Jamil curtly replied.
You gave him that stupid little smile of yours that made his heart race. A hopeful hum left your lips.
“Are you busy?”
He couldn't help but chuckle in response, giving his genuine answer.
“Nope.” He stuck his hand out, pretending that his mind wasn't going fuzzy from being in your presence. “May I have this dance?”
He felt you place your hand on top of his.
“Of course.”
With your permission, he let one hand fall to your waist as he gently guided you in a waltz-like manner. He was more experienced than you, precisely moving as the two of you dance.
You couldn't help but feel endeared. Jamil was pretty from close up. Unfortunately— or fortunately— he caught you staring. He gave you an amused look in response.
However, he didn't expect you to abruptly frown and glance away.
‘You couldn't get your hopes up,’ Your mind reminded you, recalling his reaction to your gift. It was for the better you don't get too attached.
Jamil seemed disheartened by the disconnect. His hand on your waist lightly tightened. Shortly after, a mischievous grin found its way on his face.
Suddenly, Jamil’s movement quickened. You gave him a confused raise of the brow.
“Jamil—?”
He doesn't give you time to finish your thought as he spins you, swiftly catching you in his arms afterward. Taken by surprise, you can’t help the laugh that escapes you.
You've never seen Jamil look more proud of himself as he gave you that smug little smile of his. He barely gave you time to react before he was moving the two of you again.
What you didn't expect was for him to dip you so, so low. Instinctively, you squealed. Your arms clung onto him for dear life.
“Jamil—!”
He let out a laugh at your reaction. “What? It's not like I’m going to drop you or anything.”
Your grip tightened after hearing those words. “Great sevens— you better not drop me!”
He playfully rolled his eyes. Jamil leaned in closer, his voice taking a lower tone as he whispered, “You trust me, Prefect, don’t you?”
You didn't respond to that, instead letting your small glance to the side paired with an embarrassed expression speak for itself.
In the next few steps, he taught you some more advanced footwork. He couldn't help but admire the way you’d smile as you caught onto it quickly. Jamil then spun you once more, this time it was less abrupt.
Prepared, you were able to smoothly go along with it. The boy let out an impressed hum, giving you a satisfied look. His eyes practically told you what he had planned next. Another dip.
The dip was more nerve-wracking than the spin. However, Jamil didn't intend to dip you as low as he did before— thankfully.
Your hold on him still tightened like it did before as he dipped you. Unlike before, Jamil let the pose and moment linger.
You’d gaze up at him, admiring the determined glint in his eyes. The way his hair naturally fell, framing his face, was just the cherry on top.
Oh, and how could you forget those breathtaking lips of his...
His thoughts were eerily similar to yours, taking in your features before letting his eyes roam over your lips. Jamil leaned closer, bringing his face mere inches from yours.
You swung your arms around his neck, making it easier for him to get closer… and closer… and…
Just as the two of you closed your eyes, about to connect, you hear the slow music turn to an upbeat, party song. Next thing you know, you felt your body swiftly being pulled up.
One moment, you and Jamil were so close, the next he was acting as though you were toxic. His hands left your hips as he cleared his throat.
It looked like he was planning on saying something before a familiar voice cut through the crowd.
“Jamil! Come dance with me!” The two of you both heard the young Al Asim shout.
You frowned. Right. He’s busy tonight with duties and whatnot. Although you felt disappointed, you gave him a tired smile and nod.
Jamil’s brows were furrowed, his eyes flickering between you and the direction Kalim’s voice came from.
Tonight seemed full of surprises as Jamil’d hand shoots out to your forearm and hurriedly guided you outside in the opposite direction of Kalim.
You were in shock as he pulled you outside, shutting the door behind him with a sigh.
“…You’re not gonna—?” “If anyone asks, you were nauseous from dancing and went outside with me for fresh air.”
Jamil was dead serious as he spoke, looking at you for confirmation. You nodded your head.
“Uh, got it.”
Silence soon filled the atmosphere between the two of you, the only sound being from the night’s wind. It was oddly tense. You were the first one to break the quiet.
“I’m sorry.” Jamil’s gaze immediately snapped up to yours, narrowing in confusion.
“Sorry?” He repeated, looking for clarification.
You fidgeted with the ends of your clothes. “Sorry for the chocolates. That was probably uncomfortable for you since that kinda gift is usually reserved for couples and all…”
Jamil’s expression softened the more you talked.
“Don’t be. It was a lovely gift.” His hands slowly make their way to yours, gently holding you.
“I reacted the way I did because…” Jamil sucked in a hesitant breath. “…Well, you’ve made me feel things. Feelings that I thought I was incapable of feeling.”
He carefully pulled you closer to him, allowing you to back away if you wanted to. You didn't. You just stared back into his gaze as he continued.
“Around you, I feel unburdened by my responsibilities. I feel… alive.” If you maneuvered your hand right, you could feel his pulse practically beating out of his body.
“I adore you like no other. When I received those chocolates, my mind melted. You… you turn me into such a mess.” He lightly scoffed with a small shake of the head. You can't help but chuckle.
“Nonetheless,” He gave your hands a gentle squeeze. You squeezed back.
“I’d never wish this feeling away. Never in a million years.”
Jamil’s hands momentarily left yours as he fiddled with his jacket. He was looking for something…?
“Although it’s long overdue,”
After a few moments, Jamil pulls out a small, red rose. You recognize it as a part of the decor from the party. He slips it into your hand effortlessly, his eyes staying on yours.
“Will you be my Valentine?”
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starlightsreigns · 1 day ago
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daddy lessons | a lemonade story
summary ⇢ mellie finds solace with the people who brought her life. six months feel like a lifetime without him, but her daddy warned her about men like him, so where does she go from here? word count ⇢ 2.5k tag ⇢ none. | five ; accountability “My daddy said shoot”
My daddy warned me about men like you
There’s an under-appreciated peace at your parent's house when you’re in pain. They don’t judge the hurt you're feeling, and they don’t ask questions when they can feel it in their bones that their daughter just needs their support. My mom can read my mind and it’s been like that since my younger years — she has that special ability to know exactly what the problem is without me uttering a word. 
“Mellie, baby, come eat.” she stands beside the couch. “You can finish your show afterward.” 
Her hands pull me off the couch, then lead me into the dining room where my dad is waiting. He sports a sad smile when we meet eyes, but doesn’t say anything. I know it’s because he doesn’t know what to say besides cracking a joke. 
Breakfast is quiet. My fork scraps against the side of the plate. Usually, I’d scarf down whatever my mom makes, but eating is the last thing I want after the last couple of weeks… and months… and year that I’ve had. It leaves me nauseous and anxious. 
My mom leaves the table after a while, taking the silence with her. My dad finally clears his throat but it’s impossible for me to look up at him. I know he’s going to try and give me advice, but as much as I love him, it’s not what I'm looking for. 
Came into this world, daddy’s little girl
“I know this isn’t what you want right now, Mel, but listen.” My dad sets his utensils down. “You don’t have to tell us what’s going on with Roman, but you Mellie, you’re stronger than that.” 
Defeat fills my entire body at his words, but he continues. 
“I love you, Melody, you’re my only baby girl and I don’t like seeing you upset. It hurts my heart.” 
Finally, the dam inside me breaks. The tears fall across my creek and my chest tightens in an attempt to keep my sobs at bay. My dad moves to the chair beside me and wraps his arm around me, cradling me against his chest when the sobs finally escape my body. 
“It’s okay, let it out.” He hums. “You can’t let this break you, Mellie, this won’t break you.” 
My breaths choke out, “It hurts, I trusted him and –” 
He stops me, “I never wanted you to go through something like this.” His voice chokes out. “It took a long time for your mom to ever forgive me, but I never want you to feel like this defines you or that you have to stay in something like this.”
When I was in middle school, my parents went through the roughest part of their relationship. He cheated on her with a coworker, and my mom who’s usually the nicest person, went on a bender filled with rage. I felt the coldness in the house and how much hatred she carried for over two years. For the longest time, no one was sure they’d ever get back together. It took separation and a lot of therapy for it to even be a conversation for them. 
“I know, papa.” I sigh. 
We sit in silence for a little while longer. My eyes shift up, hearing the clicks of my mom’s heels. She offers us a small smile and beckons us to follow. In the living room, she had it set up for a movie day. The couch was filled with blankets, more food on the coffee table and the lights turned down. 
But at this moment, I’m thankful that neither of my parents brought up the famous I told you so. They initially had concerns about me getting married. They love Roman, they really do, but his career made my mom question how the space would affect us. My dad said he saw a piece of him in Roman, and as bad as it is to say, I wish it wasn’t this part. The infidelity that broke my mom is now breaking me. 
He said, “Baby girl he’s playing you” 
“Mellie, you have a visitor.” My mom stands in the doorway. 
A groan slips past my lips as I turn to look at her. She motions me out and then disappears before I can get out of bed. I shuffle out and down the stairs. At the last step, Roman stands there with my dad. It’s tense. My dad is staring at Roman with his hands stuffed into his pockets. The look on his face forces Roman to stare down at the ground. 
“Dad,” My hand lays gently on his arm, kindly nudging him away but he only takes a step. 
“You can talk to her,” He grits. 
My heart pounds through my chest. I turn to my mom who is standing in the living room awkwardly. How can I plead for them to leave us alone? This is already too much and I can’t handle a conversation with him when they’re standing beside us. My mom finally looks at me and sees the look in my eyes and nods. 
“Hun, c’mon, let’s leave them.” She walks over and grabs his arm. 
“I don’t trust him, baby, I can’t let him keep playing my daughter.” 
A chill runs up my spine as my dad takes a step closer to Roman. It’s an involuntary movement for me to move up and block Roman from my dad. I’m not sure why I want to protect Roman from the ass-whooping my dad would so graciously give him, but there’s a piece of me that doesn’t want to see him bleeding on the floor. He’s still my husband.
“Dad, please, just let me talk to him.” I smile softly. “Twenty minutes and I’ll be back inside.”
For a moment, while his eyes are still locked on Roman, I’m sure my dad was ready to jump across me and tackle him to the ground. Thankfully, he nods and steps back into my mom. 
Outside, I sit on the porch swing. Roman stands near the door and takes a deep breath. It makes me laugh softly. 
“I’m happy that made you laugh,” Roman hums with a small smile. “I thought he was gonna shoot me.” 
“He has his shotgun in there, it’s still possible.” I glance in his direction. “What are you doin’ here, Roman?”
Roman carefully sits beside me on the swing, “I know you don’t wanna see me, Mellie, but I can’t go every day without seeing you.” He glances at me. “I know you’re here and safe, but I just have to see it myself.”
The cool air makes me wrap my arms around my shoulder and then lean up. I keep my eyes on the driveway to try and come up with any words. My mind swirls with too many thoughts and too many different emotions. As I zone out, I feel Roman’s jacket on my shoulder. It doesn’t make me move but instead close my eyes. 
“It doesn’t make this any easier, Roman, seeing you all the time doesn’t help me figure out where we’ll go from here.” I finally look at him. “I love you with all my heart and that’s the problem. I love you so much that I can’t step back and truly feel all the emotions.” 
He nods, “What can I do? I can’t be away from you, Mellie, but I want to fix this.”
The heavenly smell radiating off of Roman’s jacket makes my head spin. This is the closest we’ve been in months and it makes me realize how much I’ve missed him. Two months can feel like a lifetime. I wrap his jacket around me tighter and sigh. 
“There’s so much hate in my heart, still, I wish the love was enough but I can’t remember any of the good.” 
Silence follows. Neither one of us knows how to continue. 
A question hammers through my brain like a drum. It’s something that has been tucked away since coming to my parents' house. If me and my mom could forgive my dad for his mistakes in the past, why can’t I move past this with Roman? If I love Roman the way I know I do, why can’t I allow us to rehab it?
The sound of the front door opening pushes the thought away. My dad steps a foot out and looks in our direction. He motions me inside and it reminds me of when I was younger and guys would come around – they were never allowed in the house and we had twenty minutes on the porch before he’d eventually tell them to go the hell home. Something never changes with my dad. 
So, because I know he’d pull me into the house, I stand and start towards the door. 
“Mel, please come home.” Roman grabs my hand. “Please.” 
Focusing on my dad for a second, but he surprisingly doesn’t give me a reaction. Instead, he looks away and peers at the yard. I’m left alone to make that decision. 
“I can’t.” My voice shakes when I glance back at Roman. “I can’t do that.” 
Tough girl is what I had to be
For four days I rotted in bed while wrapped in Roman’s jacket. Every time I see him there’s some sort of regression that happens. Yet, I’m not even sure I can call it regression. I want to forgive him, but my pride and the hurt make it impossible for me to ever let those words come out of my mouth. 
The house is empty while my parents are at church this morning. The silence isn’t comforting. It takes me back to countless mornings, evenings, and nights I spent wondering where he was and if he was with her. It reminds me of the nights when he lay in bed and I sat on the floor in agony. The silence reminds me of the pain anger and sorrow that I can’t seem to shake anymore. 
How can I ever go back to normal? The person I was a year ago was someone I can’t even remember now. Melody from a year ago was lively, she partied, hung out with her friends on a daily, and would jump at the thought of her husband coming home to see her. Now, she sits in a house an hour away from him. 
My world stopped spinning a long time ago and I’m just now feeling the effects. 
From my spot on the couch, I can see out the window and to the yard. The rain sprinkles softly and casts a beautiful glow on everything due to the sun that was also out – you can’t help but love Florida weather, it’s as bipolar as my emotions about Roman are right now. 
A figure passes by the window and a knock rings through the house. There’s a part of me that so desperately wants to ignore it and sink further into the couch and my despair, but a voice forces me to go against that. 
“Sis, come open the door, I know you in there.” 
When I finally, through much internal monolouge, open the door, Jey gives me his award-winning smile. He doesn’t wait for me to say anything before he pulls me into his arms. A groan slips pass my lips at the sheer force behind the hug. 
“You’re gonna crush me, Jey,  lemme breathe.” I choke out. 
He let’s go of me reluctantly, but keeps his hands on my shoulders, “I just wanted to check on you, baby, Trin’s worried about you.” 
“I’m fine, brother, just trying to…” My voice trails off. 
I’m not sure what the hell I’m trying to do anymore. I thought I’d figure everything out by now, it’s been six months, but I’m more confused now than I was on day one. 
“What the fuck?” After plopping back down on the couch, I look up at Jey, “I don’t know what the hell I’m trying to do.” 
Jey sits beside me and takes my hand into his, “You know we all here for you, Mel, and we always gone be on your side.” He rubs his fingers over the palm of my hand. “Tell me what you need and I’ll help you.” 
My mind goes blank. I’m not sure what can be done at this point to make anything easier for me. But, I know Jey won’t leave this house until he gets an answer, that’s just the type of person he is. For as long as we’ve known each other, Jey is very confrontatioanal and he can’t help it. I lean against his shoulder and stare at the wall. 
“You believe me, right, Mellie, Imma always be here for you?” Jey leans down to find me eyes. “Cause I don’t think you believin’ me.”
“I believe you, swear.”  I whisper into his shoulder. “I’m just so lost and I feel like my life is falling apart.”
For a moment, he lets us sit silently. The way his focus stays on rubbing my hand makes me take a deep breath. 
“Did she tell you?” My voice fights against me. I’m not sure he heard what I ask, but when he clears his throught I shut my eyes. “I don’t want Roman to know.” 
“I won’t tell him, Mel, okay?” Jey wraps his arm around me and pulls me closer. “Let’s just sit here.”
He taught me to be strong 
How much longer can I stay here? 
How much longer can I be angry? 
How much longer can I pretend I’ll be okay? 
There needs to be a resolve and I can’t picture my life without Roman. I can live without him. I can survive without him, but I don’t want this to be the end of everything we’ve worked for all these years. Yet, maybe something just need to end.
“Melody, come here.” My mom beckons me from the kitchen. 
It was nearly time for dinner and she’s standing near the stove. I leaning against the sink with a roll of the eye. My irritation isn’t with her, she knows that, but I’m not sure how to get rid of this feeling. 
“This feeling you have, the one you don’t want to share with any of us, I understand it and I resonate with it.” She glances at me. “It took me so long to forgive your father and there was a point where I thought if I forgive him I’d lose a piece of myself, but whatever you decide won’t break you and it won’t make you any less of a woman.” 
My eyes focus on the ground. I’m not sure what she wants me to say but she continues. 
“What he did isn’t right and there’s no way to get rid of that hurt, baby, but if you love him and you want to make it work you both have to take that first step and talk through this.” She finally turns and looks at me. “If you don’t want to stay, you don’t have to, but you both still need to talk.” 
We need to talk. 
I stare at my mom for a moment then nod. 
We have to talk. 
… but I’m not ready.
“Your mother is a woman and women like her cannot be contained. Mother dearest, let me inherit the earth. Teach me how to make him beg. Let me make up for the years he made you wait. Did he bend your reflection? Did he make you forget your own name? Did he convince you he was a god? Did you get on your knees daily? Do his eyes close like doors? Are you a slave to the back of his head?”
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no words, hope you’ve enjoyed x
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giveafike · 22 hours ago
Note
So uhm.. what are the chances of a follow up of "is it new years yet?" 👀👀
TLDR: part 2 to is it new years yet? recc to read that FIRST before reading this :)
Word count + info: 4.8k + dialogue.
Warnings + Content Ahead: SFW! Cussing.
Azzie Notes ✚: happy valentines day, my loves! So cute to build onto a seasonal special with ANOTHER seasonal special. Hope this lives up to the first part, anon! Loosely reminds me of Valentine by Laufey. Whether you're spending today alone, with family, with friends or with loved ones (or something in between all that) spend it loving the little bits and pieces of the day!
Taglist: thank u for ur support! if u wanna join the taglist, head on over here
🌙 - @le-moon-nade @anneioe @maya1the-bee @miss-d-d @hannahbanannax @mfcvbs @egevtntn @the-aizzlee @hello-missunperfect-things @joeybisbootiful @2manytabsopen 🌕 - @starlitf0x
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blinked & suddenly, I had a valentine - B.T.S
————————————————————————
You chew your lip, scrolling through your camera roll for a photo that looks effortless but nonchalant. Something casual, mellow, like you didn’t spend way too long overthinking it. Which, obviously, you did. You were back in Florida, so you knew you would add a location tag - you were in a trendy little café downtown, where you and your friends were celebrating an early Galentine’s.
The air smells like espresso and overpriced pastries, your table cluttered with half-eaten croissants and empty mimosa glasses. Laughter and chaotic debate fill the space, but your focus is elsewhere. Specifically, on your phone. And, more specifically, on him.
You and Ben have been texting after New Year's Eve, or well, had been texting. At first, it was easy; inside jokes, dumb memes, conversations that left butterflies in the pit of your stomach and a dumb smile on your face, the kind of late-night conversations that left you curled up and eager for more. But then his tour picked up, college welcomed you back with a smack in the face that hit you like a truck, and the messages became… sparse. Shorter. Drier. Less fun. Now, checking in feels less like catching up and more like pestering. You already know how he’s doing, his last match was all over your feed. But that’s not the same, and you hate that it matters so much. You missed the way he’d send you random voice notes mid-practice or from his car drives, his voice slightly breathless as he joked about being worked to death. Or the way he’d text you after posting a clip of his sessions, asking if you’d seen his “epic comeback” (his words, not yours).
But lately? Crickets. You knew he was back here, in Florida, but you couldn't bring yourself to reach out, something about it felt like begging, especially during a week like Valentine's week.
You sigh, finally settling on a photo of your latte, some attempt at a heart in the foam that looks more like a deflated kidney. Whatever. You add a location tag and caption: Nothing says love like overpriced coffee and talking shit with your best friends <3.
Before you can second-guess it, you post. Your phone barely touches the table before you get side-eyed.
“Alright, who’s got you checking your phone like you’re waiting on exam results?”
You scoff, reaching for a croissant. “No one.”
A pointed silence follows. “So you’re just emotionally invested in your Instagram engagement now?”
Another voice chippers in. “Is it Ben?”
Your dramatic eye-roll gives you away immediately. “It’s not like that.”
“Oh my God, he ghosted you.”
You nearly choke. “He did not! We’ve just… been busy.”
“So he part-time ghosted you,” she corrects.
“He’s on tour, I’m drowning in school, it’s not that deep, we're busy people,” you argue, but even you don’t sound convinced.
“Right. And that’s why you’ve been on your phone all morning like a middle-aged woman tracking her kid’s live location?”
You groan, dropping your head onto the table. “I hate you both.”
“No, you miss him,” Liv singsongs, and you blindly throw a sugar packet at her.
Then, your phone buzzes.
You glance at the screen, expecting a notification from your emails. But it’s from Instagram already.
Your phone vibrates, but you ignore it. Then another buzz. The kind that isn’t a text, but an Instagram notification. You glance, just for a second.
Ben Shelton liked your story.
Your stomach does a stupid little flip. Because of course he saw it. Of course he engaged with it just enough to let you know he saw it, but not enough to actually text.
You lock your phone and flip it over.
“Wow...You put your phone face-down. That’s serious.”
You exhale sharply, shaking your head. “I’m putting it on Do Not Disturb because I’m not doing this today.”
“Yeah, we’ll see how long that lasts.”
And honestly? It lasts longer than you expect.
Shopping and side-errands keep you busy. There’s a chaotic half-hour where you all try on the dumbest Valentine-themed products and clothes you can find, one of your friends strutting out of a dressing room in the ugliest fur coat imaginable, another trying to convince everyone that this is the year they finally pull off red leather pants. You nearly cry-laugh in the middle of the store.
By the time you sit down for a late lunch-early dinner with the rest of your friends after their classes and shifts, the energy is still high. Pasta is being passed around, drinks are clinking, and someone is dramatically rehashing a dating horror story from last semester. Your phone stays buried in your bag.
Until-
“You know, you haven’t checked your phone in, like, hours.”
You blink. “Yeah? And?”
“And... I think you should.”
There’s a sudden hush at the table, eyes darting expectingly. It’s suspicious as hell.
You hesitate, but finally, dig your phone out. You tap the screen, unlocking it. A flood of notifications. Instagram likes, a missed call from your mom, a “lmk if you’re alive” text from your uni group chat. And then-
A text from him. Sent hours ago.
Ben: Crazy Galentine’s in FL? Bold choice. You holding up without me?
Your stomach flips. Again. You hate that it keeps doing that.
Someone is already trying to peek over your shoulder. “Oh my God. I knew it!”
You angle your phone away. “Mind your business.”
“So what’s he saying?”
“You’re blushing!!”
You close your eyes. Inhale, exhale, then start typing.
You: Holding up just fine, thanks. But this croissant’s got more personality than you’ve shown in weeks.
His reply is instant.
Ben: Ouch. Guess I’ll have to step up my game. What are you doing for the actual Valentine’s Day?
Your friends let out a scream so high-pitched that the next table turns to stare. You have to lean over to clamp a hand over her mouth. The reactions are so grandeur, you’d think they just got proposed to over text.
“HE’S ASKING YOU OUT!”
Your brain short-circuits. “Or, hear me out now, he’s just making conversation.”
Your phone gets snatched from your hands before you can hesitate.
“Nope. Not letting you overthink this.” She types something and tosses it back.
“What the fuck-”
You: Why? You got plans for me?
Your stomach knots as you watch the typing bubble pop up. Then disappear. Then pop up again. It does this for a few beats.
Ben: Maybe I do. You still free for me?
The smiles around the table are like you won the lottery itself, while you're being shaken and cheered around.
And you? You’re so fucking done for. The colour drains out of your face, mouth agape. Your head is in your hands. Gripping your hair at the roots. You’re barely processing the conversation around you, the clinking glasses, the exaggerated cheers.
“She’s frozen. She’s actually in shock.”
“This is so big. Like, national emergency big. Potential WAG in the making right now"
“She’s been single on Valentine’s Day since God knows when, so yeah, this is huge.”
You groan, tilting your head back. “Stop! You guys are so dramatic.”
“We’re just invested.”
You peek at your phone again, heart doing that stupid fucking thing where it stutters in your chest. The text stares back at you.
Ben: Maybe I do. You still free for me?
You exhale, thumbs hovering over the keyboard. You should probably answer. Like a normal person. But your brain is running on pure static.
What do you even say?
Yeah, totally free to publicly humiliate myself on a date?
Sorry, I can’t, I’m busy hyperventilating into my hands?
No. You need to be cool. Nonchalant. Demure.
You tap out a reply.
You: Yes. I’ll text you later, yeah?
It sends. And immediately, the second-guessing starts. Does that sound uninterested? Dismissive? Did you just ruin everything?
Your phone vibrates again.
Ben: Ye, of course. Don’t wanna interrupt your Galentine’s 👯
Another one, almost instantly:
Ben: Text me when you get home
Your face is so hot it could combust. You shove your phone down onto the table with a clatter. “Okay. Done. It’s over.”
But the excitement around you only amplifies.
“You have to reply later.”
“Obviously.” You scoff, playing it off.
“Wait.” A pause. “What are you wearing?”
The question lands like a grenade in your brain.
Oh. Fuck.
You have nothing. Nothing.
The horror must be evident on your face because gasps are let out. “Oh my God. She doesn’t have an outfit.”
The realisation spreads like wildfire.
“You cannot pull up in one of your boring sweaters.”
“Or those beat up shoes you refuse to throw out.”
“We need a game plan.”
And before you know it, someone is yanking out their phone, another is calling out malls, checking store hours.
“There is one tiny mall still open, but we have, like, an hour before they close. We have to go. Now.”
It’s ridiculous. It’s unnecessary. It’s cutting it so fucking close. But here you were dragged to the car while the rest of your table closed off dinner and paid the tabs.
"Get in, loser. We're going shopping."
"Did you just-"
"Yes, I Mean Girls-ed you. Get in! You're not driving, you drank and well last time you drove was New Year-"
"Ok no need to reopen old wounds." You scowl.
You barely have time to process before you’re shoved into the passenger seat, another friend slamming the back door shut behind them. The car peels out of the parking lot like you’re on the run from the law, not just sprinting to find a decent date outfit before the mall locks its doors.
"This is absolutely unhinged," you mutter, gripping the handle as your friend takes a sharp turn.
"You waited years for this. If you think I’m letting you pull up in some tragic little sweater and jeans combo, you’re out of your mind."
“I have good sweaters!"
"No. You do not."
The drive is a chaotic mess of bad playlist choices and a very heated discussion about what vibe you should be going for. Sexy-but-classy? Effortlessly cool? Girl-next-door-but-hot?
Your other friend, scrolling furiously, holds up a photo of some influencer in a red dress. "This."
You glance. "I am not wearing that."
"It’s literally Valentine’s Day, it’s themed-"
"I don’t care if it’s Cupid-approved, I am not rolling up looking like a walking heart emoji."
"Fine. What about-"
"Not the fucking leather pants, either."
Your friend groans, tossing their phone onto their lap. "You’re the worst."
The mall comes into view just as the GPS announces, "Your destination will be closing in 45 minutes."
"Oh, we have to haul ass."
And haul ass, you do.
The second you step into the store, your friend takes immediate command. "You- go find shoes. You- see if they have any decent dresses. You- well, just…try not to panic."
"Very helpful, thanks," you deadpan.
"You're welcome!"
The next thirty minutes are a blur of colour, unenthusiastic employees, fabric, and absolute mayhem. It feels like a Disney movie. You’re shoved into a dressing room with a handful of outfits, half of which are so out of your comfort zone that you genuinely wonder if your friends are trying to prank you.
One friend flings open the curtain. "Show us!"
"No."
A chorus of complaints erupts.
"Come on."
"This is a team effort."
You groan, reluctantly stepping out. "I look stupid."
Your friend gasps. "You look hot."
Another nods in approval. "Yeah, Ben is gonna die."
You cross your arms, looking in the mirror, smoothing over the dress. "I don’t know…"
"Trust me. When he sees you? He’s done for."
You turn back to the mirror. Okay… Maybe it’s not the worst. Maybe…you actually like it.
Maybe…this is real. Maybe it had just been a while since you last wore a dress, got dolled up for a date. And maybe, for the first time, you’re kind of excited for what happens next.
When you finally make it home, you’re wrecked. The shopping bags dig into your wrists, your feet ache, and the only thing standing between you and a glorious face-plant into your bed is the sheer force of will it takes to dump everything onto your chair instead of the floor.
You’re halfway to unconsciousness, sprawled out, limbs all over the place, when your phone buzzes.
u better text ben before u pass out lol
You groan into your pillow.
Your brain is already half-asleep, but fine. You’ll send a quick text, something chill, something casual.
You roll onto your side, grab your phone, and unlock it, squinting at the screen through the exhaustion. Ben’s last text is still sitting there, waiting for a reply.
Ben: Text me when you get home
You exhale, tapping the message.
You: I'm home now
Except. That’s not what happens.
Because your finger slips.
And instead of typing, you misfire straight into calling him. Your heart drops.
“Oh, fuck-”
You try to hit end, but it’s too late. The call screen pops up. His name. The dial tone. Your brain malfunctions.
And then-
Click.
"Hello?"
You black out. Not really. But it feels like it.
There’s a pause, and then Ben lets out a confused laugh. "Uh… you good?"
"I-" You bolt upright like that somehow helps. "That wasn’t on purpose."
He snickers. "Yeah, no kidding. You butt-dial me or something?"
"No!" You wince. "I mean- well, kind of. I was trying to text you, but I misclicked, and now-" You groan, rubbing your face. "Now we’re talking, I guess."
"Well, I'm not complaining." His voice is warm, amused. "But I gotta admit, didn't expect to hear from you this soon."
Your stomach flips. "Yeah, well, neither did I."
There’s a slight pause. Not awkward, just… there. A beat of something unspoken. Ben exhales. "So. Crazy Galentine’s, huh? You still survivin'?"
"Barely." You slump back against your pillows. "You know how dangerous last-minute shopping can get. I think I saw my life flash before my eyes 20 minutes in."
"Tragic way to go."
"I know." You grin. "How about you? Survive your Florida homecoming after your first two tournaments?"
"Hangin' in there." He sounds a little distracted, then there’s a muffled thud, like he’s just flopped onto a bed. "Was starting to think I scared you off."
"What?" Your brows furrow. "Why would you think that?"
"I don’t know, you kinda went ghost on me for a bit. Thought maybe you were over it."
Your pulse stutters. "Over what?"
Ben pauses. "You tell me."
And there it is.
That thing. The thing that’s been sitting between you for weeks.
You chew your lip, shifting slightly. "I wasn’t over anything. I just… didn’t wanna bug you."
"Bug me?" He scoffs. "You think I don't wanna hear from you?"
"You were busy! I saw all the interviews and clips. I figured, I don’t know-" You exhale. "I didn’t wanna be that person."
"What person?"
"The one forcing a conversation when the other person clearly has a million other things going on."
There’s a beat of silence. Then Ben lets out a soft laugh, one of those exasperated, are you serious? kind of laughs. "You’re an idiot, man."
"Excuse me?"
"You think I wouldn’t make time for you?" His voice is lower now, softer. "Come on. We both know that’s bullshit."
You swallow. "I-"
"I like talking to you." The words are simple. Easy. "And if I’ve been dry lately, it’s not ‘cause I don’t want to. It’s ‘cause I suck at this. The whole, like… keeping up with someone while traveling thing. But I don’t want you thinking I don’t care."
Your chest does something stupid. Tightens. "Oh."
"Yeah. Oh."
You let that sit for a second.
And then, because your brain is the way it is, you mutter, "Still think the croissant had more personality than you these last few weeks."
Ben laughs, this full, real laugh that makes your face heat. "Alright, alright, I deserved that one."
"You did."
"Guess I’ll have to make it up to you, huh?"
Your stomach flips. "Guess so."
There’s a pause, and you can hear his smirk through the phone. "So. What are you wearing for our date?"
"Woah... That’s a very bold question, Benjamin."
He chuckles, you can hear the smile in his voice. "Just trying to see if I'll be matchin' or not."
"I assume you're not planning on wearing the same dress as me, so don't worry," you say quickly. "And I’m not telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because you’ll just have to wait and see."
He groans dramatically. "Ugh, torture."
You laugh. "You’ll live."
"Debatable."
There’s another pause. A softer one. "You gonna sleep soon?" he asks.
"I should," you admit. "But this is nice."
Ben hums. "Yeah. It is."
Your eyelids feel heavy now, exhaustion creeping back in. You sink deeper into your blankets. "Okay. I’m really hanging up this time."
"Sure you are."
"Ben."
"Alright, alright. Sleep tight, Valentine."
You barely process the words before he hangs up. You’re left staring at your screen, warmth curling in your chest, wondering how the hell you’re supposed to sleep after that.
Somehow you manage to still your beating heart and fluttering stomach. The next day starts with a few good luck messages from your friends.
Hope you’re ready for your date, miss WAG Valentine’s girl 😏
Don’t overthink it. Just have fun. And don’t let him see you panic
If you cancel, I swear to God, I will show up at your house and force you out myself
You roll your eyes but smile. Then, the rest of the day is eerily quiet. For the first time in weeks, you’re alone. No bustling friend group, no plans. Just you, your apartment, and a long list of things you should be doing.
Laundry, dishes, some half-assed studying and catch up coursework. You sit at your desk, trying to focus, but your brain keeps drifting, back to last night, back to Ben’s voice in your ear, low and easy. You replay pieces of the conversation without meaning to.
And then-
Buzz.
Ben: Yo, what’s your address?
Your stomach jolts. You sit up straighter, rereading it twice, as if the words might suddenly change.
Ben: Don’t worry, not pulling up unannounced. Just need it for later.
You exhale, shaking your head as you type it out.
You: You got a time for me, or is this a surprise too?
Ben: 7
You glance at the clock. It’s barely noon.
You: Copy that. See you then.
Ben: Looking forward to it.
You lock your phone and let out a slow breath.
That gives you hours. Yet, somehow, after a good nap, those hours fly. By the time you start getting ready, the nerves settle in fast. Makeup first. Then hair. The whole process feels foreign, like muscle memory you haven’t used in forever.
And then, the dress. You slip it on carefully, smoothing it down, adjusting where needed. Then, the shoes.When you finally step back and look at yourself in the mirror, you freeze.
For the first time in so long, you actually got up for something. You spent years busying yourself and rejecting any chance of romance, nothing was really worth it - not worth stressing yourself over a sleezy "situationship", but now it sinks in. You actually put in the effort. And looking at yourself now, standing there, hair done, makeup set, dress hugging your figure. You almost don’t recognize yourself, it's almost weird.
Your stomach flutters.
Excitement. Nerves. Anticipation.
And then,
Ding-dong.
Your breath catches.
You hesitate for only a second before making your way to the door. A final deep breath, then you open it.
And there he is.
Ben stands there in a crisp shirt, nice pants, clean. But your eyes barely register the fit because in his hands,
Roses.
Bright, fresh, wrapped neatly.His gaze flicks over you, and something in his expression shifts. His lips part slightly, but for a moment, he doesn’t speak. Just takes you in.
"Wow." His voice is softer than usual. "You look… damn."
And witht that, it all feels worth it, all perfect. Your face heats. "Shut up."
"No, seriously." He grins, holding the flowers out. "These might be pretty, but you definitely win."
You bite your lip, taking them carefully. "Smooth."
“You clean up nice too y'know,” you tease, hoping your voice doesn’t betray how jittery you feel.
He smirks. “I should’ve brought my A-game.”
“This isn’t your A-game?” you quip, reaching for the flowers, setting them down to the side.
“Nah, this is like… my B+. I had to hold back. Didn’t want to peak too early.”
You shake your head, biting back a laugh. “So,” you start, turning back to him. “What’s the plan? We’re not exactly in a walk-in-and-blend-in situation.”
He shoves his hands in his pockets, grinning. “Yeah, I figured unless you wanted to spend the night dodging cameras, we’d keep it private. So, you trust me?”
You arch a brow. “That depends. Are you kidnapping me?”
“Wouldn’t be much of a first date if I was,” he says, leading you outside. “Though, technically, our first date was you hitting my car.”
“That was not a date.”
“I met you. I got your number. We flirted.” He shrugs. “Sounds like a meet-cute to me.”
You roll your eyes but your smitten smile betrays you. “So, where are we going?”
“You’ll see.” He winks. "You ready?"
You glance back at your apartment, nerves buzzing under your skin. Then, you look back at him, at the way he’s standing there, all easy and comfortable like this isn’t the first real date you two have ever had, nor the only date you have planned. He seems so confident, sincere and honest, like this was meant to happen. He holds out a hand for you, no pressure, just a simple invite. You take it, holding his large, warm hand in yours.
Fifteen minutes later, you do see. And it’s… kind of perfect.
Ben pulls up to a quiet, tucked-away spot by the water. The sky is painted in soft purples and blues, the last remnants of daylight fading. There’s a blanket in the trunk, takeout in a bag, and music playing softly from his phone.
“You planned a picnic?” You raise a brow, surprised.
He rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah, well. Figured you wouldn’t want to spend the whole night inside, but also didn’t want to spend it dodging people with iPhones.”
You glance up at him, then at the setup. “This is actually… really sweet.”
Ben smirks. “What, thought I’d just take you to a drive-thru and call it a night?”
“I mean, I did hit your car. Thought you might hold a grudge.”
“Oh, I do,” he says, opening the basket and setting up. “But I’m playing the long game.”
You both settle onto the blanket, the scent of warm food filling the air. The conversation is easy, mostly teasing at first. He asks about your classes, your friends, you ask about his training, and somehow you end up talking about the first time you met.
“I still don’t know how you managed to hit a parked car,” Ben says, shaking his head.
“It was a tight spot, let it goooo"
“Should've hit the Tesla, in my opinion.”
“Okay, well, maybe I was distracted.”
“By what? Your own bad driving?”
You swat at him, laughing. “By trying to keep the car calm, genius.”
Ben grins, leaning back on his elbows. “And yet, here we are.”
Here you are. Sitting next to him, by the water, the air warm and balmy, the food mostly gone, but the conversation still going. It feels like you both have been waiting for this. And now that it’s here, neither of you is in a rush to leave. You lean back on your hands, looking up at the sky. The stars are sharp tonight, scattered like someone spilled glitter across the darkness. It feels peaceful, so different from how you felt earlier, standing in front of your mirror, stomach twisting with nerves. Now, it’s easy, natural.
Ben watches you for a moment, something unreadable in his expression. “You know, I did want to text you more.”
His voice is softer now, a little more honest. You glance over, catching the way his brows pull together slightly, like he’s been thinking about this for a while. “Yeah?” you ask. “Why didn’t you?”
He exhales, looking up at the starry sky before answering. “I don’t know. I guess I didn’t want to do the half-assed, ‘hey, wyd’ texts when I was exhausted or distracted. I didn’t want it to feel like… an obligation. But I don’t know. I think I got in my own head. Like, I’d think about it, but then I’d talk myself out of it. Tell myself you were busy, or I was busy, or-”
“That it was too late,” you finish for him. You nod slowly as you meet his eyes. “I get that, I think I did the same thing.”
“I also didn’t want to, like…” He pauses. “I don’t know. Screw this up before it even started.”
You tilt your head. “And what is ‘this,’ exactly?”
Ben meets your gaze, the corner of his mouth twitching. “I was hoping we’d figure that out.”
Your heart does that annoying little flip again, but you play it cool. “Well, if it’s anything like your tennis game, I expect a lot of effort.”
Ben scoffs. “You wound me.”
You smirk, bumping your knee against his. “We’ll see.”
A comfortable silence settles between you. It’s strange, really, how something so simple, just reaching out, had felt so difficult before. But now, sitting here next to him, it seems ridiculous that either of you hesitated at all.
You tilt your head, studying him. “Did you ever think I wasn’t interested?”
Ben’s lips press together in thought. “No… I mean, I hoped that wasn’t the case. But I also knew you weren’t just gonna sit around waiting for me to finally get my shit together.”
You smile. “Well, you got it together eventually.”
“I did,” he says, nudging your foot lightly with his. “And I’d like some credit for that, thank you very much.”
You roll your eyes, but before you can say anything else, something streaks across the sky.
Your breath catches. “Oh my go-”
Ben follows your gaze, and for a second, neither of you says anything as you watch the shooting star burn its path across the night before disappearing into the dark.
Your heart is still racing when you turn back to him. “That was my first one.”
“Ever?”
You nod. “I always missed them before. I’d be looking the wrong way, or I’d blink, or someone would swear they saw one, but I never did.”
He grins. “Guess you got lucky.”
You glance back up, like you’re trying to will another one to appear, but the sky is still. When you look at Ben again, he’s already looking at you.
“I think I already was,” you say, quieter now.
His expression changes just slightly, his amusement giving way to something softer. The space between you doesn’t feel quite as wide anymore. His gaze dropping briefly to your lips before flicking back up. But he doesn’t move. He doesn’t do anything except sit there, watching you, waiting. And maybe it’s because of the way your stomach feels light, or the way the night feels infinite, or because you’ve both spent too much time holding back, but this time, you close the space, taking the leap, the step forward. Maybe, you did miss him, maybe Cupid finally struck - whatever excuse it was, nothing you could say or do would convey as much as you felt other than his lips on yours.
It’s not rushed, not some grand, sweeping moment. It’s slow, hesitant, like making sure this is real. Like neither of you want to mess it up. Ben exhales softly against your lips, his fingers twitching like he’s deciding what to do with them before settling lightly against your jaw, thumb brushing over your cheek in the faintest touch, before holding your face. The kiss deepens just slightly, his nose bumping against yours, his other hand resting warm against your knee, holding you as though he was scared you might fade right then and there.
And then, just as naturally, you both pull back. Not far. Just enough to breathe.
You open your eyes to find him already looking at you, his smile small, almost like he’s trying to hold it back.
“What?” you whisper.
Ben shakes his head, his gummy smile wide and bright. “I... I'm just so happy, so glad we're here.”
Something about the way he says it, so simple but so honest, makes your throat feel tight. You barely resist the urge to look away. Instead, you huff out a soft, shaky breath, trying to mask how much that made your chest ache in the best way. “Yeah. Me too.”
His smile is small but real, and for a second, neither of you move. The warmth of his fingers still lingers against your jaw, your wrist. Then, finally, you lean back, the moment settling between you like something fragile but steady.
You think you’re gonna like seeing more lucky shooting stars.
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pa-pa-patato · 5 months ago
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……why do I have a feeling that bendy will be kidnapped and the only way they would be able to find is because of that weird connection between cuphead and him
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seilon · 6 months ago
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love when this is referred to as the gifted kid website. shockingly my mental disorders made me mentally disordered and school never really vibed with that so. couldn’t be me
#ppl always talking about their whatever grade reading level and how many books they’d read as kids and im just over here like🧍🏽#I’ve never been actually bad at english or reading but I couldn’t focus on reading books to save my fucking life#I hated those sheets where you had to read like a certain number of books or whatever over the course of a semester or the year or whatever#my GATE test scores for english were super high but my math was bad enough that I never qualified#and adhd made me not even perform well in English half the time because I couldn’t pay attention I couldn’t read long books I couldn’t turn#in my assignments or if I did they were late and etc etc etc#don’t get me started with math#I was the worst in my class in third grade at minute math and never made it to the levels of minute math my classmates did#(they posted results on the wall for everyone to see)#and in 6th grade I was put into an additional remedial math class#throughout middle-high school I was at the level of most classmates in terms of the classes I took but that’s only because I was not allowe#to fail and was put through absolute fucking hell with a billion tutors and grueling hours of extra work from them and blah blah blah#like I remember how I felt in those tutoring sessions and half the time I actually wanted to cry.#I didn’t start doing solidly genuinely Good in school until senior year of high school.#not coincidentally around the same time I started taking adderall I think#I had accommodations by 9th grade but they didn’t do that much except for the function that let me turn in assignments up to 2 days late#without penalty. which i had teachers question sometimes and i had to pull the Yeah it’s Literally Against The Law to not allow me this car#anyway. point is. i was never in the gate program and most of my friends were and it was mostly adhd related#adhd is considered such a quirky nothing disorder nowadays that I don’t even like mentioning I have it really. because what people think of#when I say the term is Not what i actually dealt with and made school torturous and made my parents lash out at me for things and etc etc#depression and dysphoria did not help either. but I digress#I’m not sure why im making this post#kibumblabs
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denkisauce · 1 year ago
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don’t have the energy to rewrite my thoughts here on tumblr but these past couple weeks have been so rough and it’s really hard to talk about my feelings on everything but also really hard to not talk about.
i know i’m just like a random blog on tumblr but it feels important to share my feelings. zionism does not hold up under scrutiny or critical thinking which is why it’s so important to educate yourself, even if it’s hard even if it’s uncomfortable. knowledge is power and being informed is a key tool againist oppression
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kuiinncedes · 8 months ago
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:c
#i luv my friends ;-; i feel like i’m gonna lose my mind when i’m not living right by all my friends lmao 😭#i’ve literally been hanging out w ppl like at least every other day if not every day#we made semi spontaneous plan to go to pride tmrwwweww 🥹🥹 i’m excited#i just am so happy that i get to spend sm time w ppl rn bc we’re all somewhat free bc summer 😭#also idk i was just thinking abt this recently but like#it’s kinda new to me to like actually be comfortable/confident in knowing my friends want/like my presence ;-;#even then i’m not that confident LMAO bc after sm time together i’m like surely they’ll get sick of me#like we’ve seen each other every day the past like three days#but no 🥹 ugh like idk man i had one elementary to sort of middle and high school friendship#that like fucked me up i feel like lmfao 💀#like girl sidelined me so much for other friends that i just#:l and cried so much bc of that 😀 anyway 😀#so like idk i’m just so grateful rn 😭😭😭#also was thinking abt it recently bc my mom made me feel judged/ made me feel like she was annoyed that i was staying here on campus#when i technically don’t need to and my main/only reason is bc friends#and after that conversation w her i got kinda annoyed bc i was like#i have had so many conversations w you where i was sad af or frustrated that my friends wouldn’t reach out to me ever#or my friend who never paid attention to me when other friends were around#like i don’t think she’s actually judging like me staying for friends but it was that one conversation we were both kinda annoyed idk#and i was just like . pls#anyway 😀 i always have so many friend thoughts i always be overthinking it LOL#anyway anyway i need to be up in like 6 hrs LOLLLLLL pride tho yay 🥰🥰🥰#rip me not having clean cute clothes for this LOL 🤪#ong last yr i tied my hair in a ponytail w like rainbow hair ties tied down the ponytail……#idk if i have those but if i do maybe i should do that again LOL#idk might be too lazy tho we’ll see how much time i have to get ready when i wake up 🤡#jeanne talks#TOO MUCH BYE
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fallminlove · 19 days ago
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,,
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reikunrei · 10 months ago
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coming to terms w the fact that i’ve been unintentionally cultivating some not-so-great disordered eating habits over the last several years, which have finally come to a head in the last 4 months or so since it’s the only thing i feel like i can “control” in my life, has been. not very fun lol
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deus-ex-mona · 2 years ago
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little brothers and their will to #slay, man </3
#while yes yes this post technically does apply to the simp bros i wanna cry about my own bro in the tags so you have been warned~?#so to start off my monthly existential crisis rant i just wanna say that… i’m so so soo envious of my bro. like to a really unhealthy extent#he’s tall enough to reach the top shelves. i can barely touch them if i jump. he has so many friends and even a gf. i have 0 irl friends.#he is able to sit in one spot and focus on his studies. i can’t even sit down for a full half hour to *eat* without getting up to take a nap#he’s learning how to drive. i can’t. he was admitted into university. i wasn’t. he’s able to find what he likes and stick to it. i can’t.#like mannn. he thrived in the course he chose in tertiary education while i lost my passion for it in the middle of my first year.#he’s good at picking up everything he tries (puzzle cubes; bball; you name it he’s good at it) while i’m just. bad at everything i try lol#he’s very good at his studies (aside from languages) and sports. i’m not good at anything at all.#he gets told that he has a great sense of humour. i’m just. boring and annoying. lolllll#he’s super sociable and he has good relations with pretty much every single family member (sans me). i’m not in contsct with most of the fam#heck he was pretty much the favourite from the moment he was born. his baby pics still get brought up from time to time bc of how cute he is#(granted it’s bc he looks like a bby m*ch*l*n man (like the tire company mascot) and he’s super cute in them but still)#and he’s also a guy and content with being a guy which is just… not fair y’knowwww~~~ asian family boy biases and all (cries)#our father pretty much cast me aside once my bro was old enough to hang with him. and even before then the bias was as clear as day. >:(((((#i make the dude mad? i get screamed at and whaccced. bro gets the dude mad? he gets a lesson on how to throw punches instead!!! like wow!!!!#he’s the only one who got to escape any direct physical harm from the guy and yet!!!! he was the 1st one to be singled out for trauma focus#idk if it’s bc of his age back then or whattttt but i can’t believe i had to friggin’ ask my therapist back then for a trauma assessment :(#2015 was a different time… my bro managed to succeed in school while i was rejected from the drama club for being too depressed :((((#but i’m sure my bro has his own share of struggles… and i’m glad that he has a few groups of friends to chill with. really.#but i just can’t help feeling extremely envious of him. i could never tell him any of this though we hardly talk at home lol#and he pretends not to know me when i approach him in public lmfaoooo. i don’t blame him though; i’d do the same if i were to approach me#so yeah. if you read this i’m sorry for being cringefail and bad at everything~~ am i still allowed to pollute your dash~? <3#and also. idk if i’ll be able to continue sischange over this week bc i’ll be handling 2 workstations by meself :( and idk how tired i’ll be#but we’ll see ok~? sorry for having zero time management skills am i still qualified to be a legit adult~?#sunday’s 🧂saltfest🧂
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kiszjuli · 21 hours ago
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PERFECT EXCUSE .ᐟ
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✸ playful!chenle x fem!reader | genre. fluff | w.c 2.2k | ♡
↳synopsis. you never cared much for valentine’s day. it’s not that you needed to, because school was more important. however, when you get roped into a (stupid) day at the valentine’s day fair, with the annoyingly charming zhong chenle, maybe your perspective will change.
↳playlist. good days - sza. the perfect pair - beabadoobee. bad - wavetoearth. rainbow - nct dream. sunflower - swae lee. love countdown - nayeon.
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valentine’s day at college was a disaster waiting to happen. at least, that’s how you’d always viewed it. all the heart-shaped decorations, the excessive amounts of candy, the couples holding hands like they were somehow more in love because of the date on the calendar. it was just a lot of noise—unnecessary noise at that. your life was perfectly organized, your time always scheduled, and you certainly didn’t need some manufactured holiday reminding you that romance existed.
but, of course, your best friend mia had other plans.
“please, just come with me,” mia begged, standing in your dorm doorway, her eyes wide and pleading. “you know i can’t go alone, and honestly, i need you to go so i can be with felix. i’ll owe you, i swear. just this once. for me?”
you rolled your eyes. felix was mia’s crush—one of your other friends who had a thing for always being the center of attention. you couldn’t really say no, knowing how much it meant to her, especially since she’d been talking about him nonstop for weeks. if she wasn’t your best friend, you would’ve said no.
“fine,” you muttered, sighing, setting your textbooks down. “but i’m only coming because you’re clearly desperate, and i’m not staying long.”
mia’s face lit up as if you’d just given her the world. “you’re the best! i’ll make it worth your while, i promise.” she ran to you, attacking you in a hug.
so here you were, standing outside the valentine’s day fair on campus, which, unsurprisingly, looked like cupid threw up. balloons floated lazily above booths, and the scent of cotton candy and fried food was everywhere. people roamed around in pairs, couples wrapped in the gooey sweetness of the holiday, while you tried your best to keep the grimace off your face.
“i’m going to go find felix,” mia said, her voice practically vibrating with excitement. “you’re fine here. i’ll text you in a bit.” she dashed off before you could even say anything in protest. your words dying on your tongue as you sighed deeply.
great, you thought. now you were stuck in the middle of this chaos, alone and—if you were being honest—irritated. you wandered toward the game booths, wondering how long you could fake having fun, a familiar voice called out from behind you.
“hey, you’re not trying to sneak off and study, are you?”
you turned to find zhong chenle leaning against one of the booths, casually sipping from a drink, his bright smile practically glowing in the chaos around you. chenle was the kind of guy who could brighten up a room with barely any effort. always cheerful, always a little too playful, he had a way of dragging you into whatever ridiculous situation he was in—whether you liked it or not.
“chenle,” you said with a sigh, trying not to let your annoyance show. “what are you doing here?”
“i could ask you the same thing.” he grinned. “are you here for the lovey dovey atmosphere, or for the free candy?”
you crossed your arms. “neither. i’m here because mia begged me to come. and now i’m completely regretting it.”
he laughed at that, his voice like music, light and easy. “you know, it’s not so bad once you give in. the fair’s actually kinda fun, once you stop being all… ‘up tight’ about everything.”
you shot him a glare. “i’m not ‘up tight.’ i just have better things to do than waste my time at some cheesy fair.”
chenle raised an eyebrow and stepped closer. “you say that now. you’re already stuck here so…might as well make it worth your while.”
you didn’t know why, but his playful tone made you feel slightly… off balance. you’d never been good at letting go of your well-structured plans, but something about his easy confidence made you want to step outside your comfort zone. you shook the thought away.
“yeah, well, mia’s gone, and i’m stuck walking around by myself, in a place where i don’t really wanna be. not really my idea of fun.”
“stuck?” chenle tilted his head, as if considering your words. “you don’t have to be stuck.” his grin widened. “here, how about this? us. you. me. valentine’s day fair.”
you blinked, unsure if you’d heard him correctly. “what?”
“no, seriously,” he said, his voice dropping to a playful, almost firm tone. “i’m asking you out. right here, right now. us, enjoying the fair.” his grin was wide, but there was an edge of sincerity to his words that caught you off guard.
you almost laughed, half in disbelief. “you’re asking me out—here? now?”
chenle shrugged, unfazed. “why not? where better to then here? what else is valentine’s day about if not taking chances?”
you stared at him for a long moment, your mind racing. it wasn’t like you hadn’t noticed chenle’s charm or the way he made everything seem easier than it was. but asking you out here? it was so out there, so unlike the controlled life you were used to.
“i don’t know…” you said slowly, shaking your head. “i have a lot of work to do, and—”
“hey, hey.” chenle cut you off, his voice almost pleading, but still playful. “come on. just one day, no homework, no plans. just us and some fun what do you say?”
you felt yourself still hesitating. for all your plans and your need to be in control, something about the way he said it made you think that maybe, just maybe, you could let go for once.
“i see it, you’re giving in,” he smirks pointing at you.
“fine,” you said, a little too quickly, surprising yourself. “one hour. and i’m nothing cheesy,”
chenle’s grin was so wide, you swore he was glowing. “deal.”
and just like that, you found yourself swept up into whatever mess chenle had in mind for the day.
“you won’t regret this,” chenle says, grinning as he tugs you forward, weaving through the crowd. his grip on your wrist is light, like he knows you could change your mind at any second. and honestly, you might.
it was way too loud for your liking. screams and yells ring through the air, couples walking past hand in hand, some holding oversized stuffed animals, others sharing pink cotton candy like something straight out of a cliché rom-com. exactly the kind of thing you didn’t sign up for.
“i already regret it,” you mutter, adjusting your bag strap.
chenle hums like he doesn’t hear you—or, more likely, like he’s choosing not to.
then he stops, turning to face you with a dramatic flourish. “so, where should we start our date?”
you groan, smacking his arm. “this is not a date.”
chenle only laughs. “alright, alright. how about something simple? games?” he gestures toward the ones with flashing lights and prizes hanging from the ceilings—rows of giant plushies, novelty heart pillows, and even a ridiculously large teddy bear.
you eye the setup warily. “you mean the games that are totally rigged?”
“that’s loser talk.” he slings an arm over your shoulders before you can protest, steering you toward the booths. his warmth is distracting, and you hate how easy it is for him to act like this—like this whole thing is normal.
he stops in front of a classic ring toss booth, plopping down a few bills. “three tries,” the vendor says, handing over the rings.
chenle smirks, holding up a ring between two fingers. “watch and learn.”
you cross your arms. “you’re gonna lose.”
“you doubt me? me?” he presses a hand over his chest in mock offense. “that hurts. deeply.”
you roll your eyes, but you don’t miss the way his lips twitch, barely holding back a grin. and maybe you’re just a little curious to see if he can actually win.
the first ring bounces off the bottle. the second does the same.
you glance at him, smug. “loser talk, huh?”
chenle exhales, rolling his shoulders like he’s about to take the final shot of an nba game. then, he tosses the last ring.
it lands perfectly.
the booth lights flash, and the vendor claps once. “winner!”
chenle throws his arms up like he just won an olympic gold medal, then turns to you, triumphant. “see? skill.”
you shake your head, unimpressed. “that was luck.”
“skill,” he repeats, accepting the prize. a heart-shaped plushie. he turns to you, eyes twinkling, and before you can react, he presses it into your arms.
you blink down at it. “what—”
“you did say no cheesy stuff, but, y’know.” he shrugs. “couldn’t help myself.”
your fingers tighten around the plushie despite yourself. you tell yourself it means nothing. that he’s just being his usual, annoying self.
but when you look up, he’s already watching you, a small, knowing smile playing at his lips.
and for the first time tonight, you don’t have a quick comeback.
you don’t know when it happens—when the reluctant acceptance of being here turns into something else, something dangerously close to enjoying yourself. it had been at least an hour by now, you didn’t notice, not keeping track anymore.
maybe it’s when chenle insists on buying you a strawberry milkshake, claiming it matches the “valentine’s aesthetic” before promptly stealing half of it with a smug grin. or maybe it’s when he drags you to the dart booth, loses spectacularly, and then pouts at you until you give up your last attempt—only for you to actually win, leaving him in stunned silence before he bursts into laughter.
“i can’t believe this,” he groans, throwing an arm over his eyes dramatically. “this is the worst day of my life.”
you snort, sipping the remnants of your milkshake. “you’re just mad i’m better than you.”
chenle lowers his arm, watching you with that ever-present amusement in his eyes. “nah, i’m just mad i have to give you all my future winnings now. gotta keep my girl’s record clean.”
you freeze.
he doesn’t, not even for a second, like he didn’t just say something that sent your brain into overdrive. instead, he steps closer, leaning in slightly. “huh. no comeback?”
your fingers tighten around the stuffed bear he won for you earlier, and you tear your gaze away, heart pounding in your chest. “shut up.”
he laughs, the sound rich and full, and for once, you don’t mind being the reason for it.
the realization hits you then—soft but certain. you like being here. you like chenle. you had for a while; behind all the sourness you felt towards him, hearing his laugh, bubbly personality, and seeing his stupid smile. and the worst part? you don’t even want to fight it anymore.
the sun has nearly set, casting the fairgrounds in a golden haze, and you swear the air feels different—softer, warmer, like the world itself is urging you to stay in this moment a little longer.
“okay,” you murmur, just loud enough for him to hear. “this wasn’t terrible.”
chenle turns to you, grinning like he’s just won the biggest prize of the night. “that’s it? that’s all i get?”
you roll your eyes, but there’s no real annoyance behind it. “okay, fine. i had fun, okay?”
he hums, clearly satisfied, and nudges your shoulder with his. “good. now let’s end on a high note.”
you don’t even have time to question it before he’s steering you toward the ferris wheel. the line is short, and before you can put up a fight—not that you’re sure you even want to—he’s already handing over tickets, tugging you into one of the cars.
the ride begins, slow and steady, lifting you above the fair, above the laughter and music, until all that’s left is the quiet hum of the night and the soft glow of carnival lights below.
chenle leans back, stretching out like he owns the place, but then he turns his head, watching you carefully. “so?”
you glance at him. “so what?”
he tilts his head, eyes warm, knowing. “so, am i growing on you?”
you’ve always thought of chenle as loud, unpredictable, a little too confident for his own good. but here, in the quiet, you see something else—the way his eyes search yours like he’s trying to figure out what you’re thinking, the way his fingers tap idly against his knee, like he’s waiting for something.
you let out a breath of laughter, but your heart betrays you, beating faster than it should. you should have a snarky response, something quick and teasing, but all you can do is hold his gaze, the space between you charged with something unspoken.
he shifts closer, not enough to cross a line, but enough to make it clear—if you wanted to close the gap, he wouldn’t stop you.
your fingers tighten around the stuffed bear in your lap.
“maybe,” you whisper.
chenle’s smile softens, and then he gently reaches out, brushing a loose strand of hair behind your ear, fingertips lingering just a second too long.
the ferris wheel slows, grounding you, but as you look at him, at the way he’s watching you like he’s memorizing every detail, you realize something—
maybe you don’t mind falling, after all.
taggies(open) ↳ @kittydollzz @huffnpufffck @completelyjae @lovesuhng @nae-vm @ayibdorrt @chocoriki @yomaman @yukisroom97
⁀➷⊹ ࣪ ˖~ THE LA LA LOVE SERIES .ᐟ
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a-high-femme · 2 years ago
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rant in tags bc I want to sob into a pillow
#I can’t describe to you guys what my job is like. I know I post ridiculous funny stuff but it’s very rarely funny in the moment#I’m a substitute teacher‚ which means that even though I’m in the building EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR#and even though I’ve known most of these kids since LAST DECEMBER (2021)#they just. don’t fucking listen to a word I say#it took 14 minutes and a dean of students in the room with me today to get one of my classes to stop talking over/ignoring me#and I’m not even yelling at them‚ I’m literally trying to 1.) say ‘good afternoon folks!’ and 2.) tell them what the assignment is#all day long I’m ignored and disrespected by the same kids and there are no consequences because this is a charter school#and day after day I’m also disrespected by staff because I’m ‘just a sub’ and you#everyone keeps calling out of work#we finally filled the last VACANCY we had TWO WEEKS AGO. we’ve been down 3 full time teachers since the beginning of the year#and as of two weeks ago we finally filled the last vacancy. so I could go back to JUST substituting.#but today the 7th grade ELA teacher just gave us his one-week notice which means that now that I am the ONLY BUILDING SUB#(we started the year with 3‚ now it’s just me)#I have this terrible suspicion that ​I’m gonna get stuck with 7th grade ELA for the rest of the year. while trying to do grad school.#I just… I’m exhausted all the time#and I act like I’m not but I am#this job is so demeaning and exhausting and I love my students (specifically my 8th graders and high schoolers)#but I’m not gonna see them for the rest of the year. I’m gonna be stuck in 7th grade ELA I just know it#when I say that the middle school is like an active war zone I’m not joking#I had to stop a kid from choking out his classmate today#I leave work every day with headaches because it’s always so fucking loud‚ even in the middle of lessons#I want my old job back‚ this year has been exhausting and I don’t know how I’ve ended up taking on so much more than I’m supposed to#I covered 6 out of 7 periods again this week. the most that any full time teacher has to teach is 4 out of 7#and the subbing coordinator keeps giving me the heaviest coverage loads and then telling me he’s ‘disappointed’ by how tired I am#he also gave every single person on the subbing team specific shoutouts in his daily emails… except me#tldr I’m feeling disrespected by students and overworked by my coordinator and undersupported by admin and taken for granted by coworkers
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learnandturn · 10 months ago
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I was punched and pepper sprayed by cops that my university administration set on student protesters yesterday. Including once where a cop ripped my mask off my face, grabbed my jaw, and sprayed pepper sprayed straight into my mouth. The university sent out an alert in the middle of our protest canceling classes for the rest of the day, only citing “adverse conditions”. After protesters dispersed under threat of even more violence and three buses of riot police from all over the state with rubber bullets and bully sticks parked in front of one our school’s famous landmarks. I staggered over to a couple of friends who were watching on the sidelines. They gave me water and an apple and held a bag of ice on my very pepper spray irritated face. As they were walking me back to my dorm we ran into one of their roommates. She had taken cancelled classes as an opportunity to get crumbl cookie with her friends. Standing in front of her, happy in a floral blouse with her box of cookies, in my pepper spray and water soaked tshirt, keffiyeh sadly hanging off my shoulder, holding an ice pack to my mouth, felt like a slap in the face.
After putting my pepper spray soaked clothes, shoes, and keffiyeh in a plastic bag and taking an extraordinarily painful shower, a friend and I went for dinner just off campus. There we had a pot of green tea and ramen to soothe pepper sprayed throats. We got ice cream after (shared a cup with chocolate and raspberry pomegranate with strawberry pieces on top, it was very good). From our spot outside the ice cream place we watched a steady stream of groups of sorority girls in matching jeans shorts and blue bikini tops walking back to their apartments after some apparently raucous parties. The cognitive dissonance was insane. I really felt a little like I was going crazy.
Even this morning, waking up to the smeared sharpie of the National Lawyer’s Guild’s phone number on my arm, a black and blue chest from where a grown man straight up clocked me while I was held up by two other protesters in a wall, and a still sore throat and eyes from the pepper spray, life goes on like normal. I still have final papers to write and a math exam to review for.
I’m not sure I really have a point. But, this feeling only makes me want to fight harder for a free Palestine. So, fuck Israel for being an apartheid state and all of their crimes over the last 76 years. Fuck university administration for not disclosing their level of investment in Israel. Fuck university administration for not divesting from this genocide. Fuck Joe Biden for actively supporting this genocide. And fuck the police.
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tariah23 · 9 months ago
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I hate when mfs are playing on the train like ppl don’t got places to go man.
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cryptictongues · 5 months ago
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The Thrill of the Chase
pairing: Logan Howlett x Female Mutant!Reader rating: Explicit (MINORS DNI; 18+) word count: 7.1K summary: Logan ate part of your sandwich, so you stole his cigars. Things turn out differently from what you were expecting.
warnings: fluff and smut, teasing, slight predator/prey trope, banter, making out, dirty talk, oral (f and m receiving), vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, squirting, soft!dom Logan
Author's Note: My first Logan fic! X-Men used to be my world and the fact it is making a comeback has rejuvenated me. Also, I was picturing Logan from the first three trilogies but DOFP!Logan also crossed my mind so :)
Please read my pinned post before following me! Minors and ageless blogs will be blocked as this blog’s content is NSFW.
[AO3 link]
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It was getting close to evening, everyone doing their own thing to unwind after a long day of classes and teaching. You had planned to do the same thing, planning to grab a quick bite in the kitchen before getting ready to relax in your room. You were whipping up a quick and easy sandwich, assembling it onto a plate before moving it to the island in the middle of the kitchen. You went to get a soda from the cupboard, only for your skin to raise as you sense something is about to happen: a certain someone was about to come take your sandwich. 
“If you take one bite out of my sandwich Logan, I will kick your ass.”
You turn to see him, eyes wide along with his mouth, about to chomp into your dinner. He closes his mouth, only for him to keep the sandwich in his hands and an “innocent” smile on his face. 
“Oh, you mean this sandwich?” 
You shut the cupboard door, walking over to him with a stern, playful look. You know he is messing with you. That has been the dynamic of your relationship with him. Ever since he decided to stay here at the school and join the X-Men, you two have grown closer and closer, enjoying each other’s company over anyone else. It didn’t matter what either of you did. You both thrived in the presence of one another. 
But something that has become common practice as of late was playful in nature. You both have always teased, but it has recently ramped up. If one of you started it, the other would find a way to end it before starting again. It was the push and pull between the two of you that you loved, and it has only made you long for him. You want to believe he feels the same, but even your mutation of precognition can’t fully confirm that. 
“Yes, that is my sandwich. I worked very hard on it. I'll have you know.” You are standing in front of him now, having to look up at him slightly as you wait for his next move. 
“I’m sure you did. It looks delicious.” He says, but rather than looking at the food, he is looking right at you. Cheeky bastard.
“Y-yeah, which is why I am asking you to put it down so I may enjoy it.” 
“I don’t know. I think I wanna have a taste first.” 
His hazel eyes are staring you down, almost begging for you to make a move. In reality, you really didn’t care if he ate it. You could easily make another and enjoy dinner with him. But you know that isn’t what he is doing right now. He is playing with you, wanting to rile you up. Well, it takes two to play that game.
“That sandwich is very precious to me. I’d think before you act.”
“Oh yeah?” He smirks, bringing his face closer to yours. “What are you going to do about it?”
“I’ll take something precious of yours.” 
He chuckles, turning his face to the sandwich. “I’d like to see you try, sweetheart.”
He takes a huge bite out of your sandwich, his eyes closing as he chews. You purse your lips, watching him savor your meal with gusto. You know he is overexaggerating to truly get at you, but little does he know you have a trick up your sleeve.
“Enjoying my meal?” 
He turns back to you, swallowing before licking his lips. “Very much. I may have to take another bite.”
You get up in his space, settling onto your tippy toes so your face is by his ear. You let your breath waft against his skin, causing a shiver to shake his core. You can tell he is anticipating what you will do, always highly enjoying your responses to his antics. Oh, he is so in for it.
“That’s okay. You can have it.” You let your pointer finger trace his collarbone that is very much on display from his white, fitted tank. “And you want to know why that is, Logan?”
He takes a deep breath, very apparent that your actions are doing something to him. His left hand lets go of the sandwich to settle on your hip, squeezing the flesh slightly to ground himself. It is actions like that that make you believe you do something to him. Like you drive him just as insane as he does to you. You bring your left hand to his head, pulling him down so you can really get into his ear. 
“That’s because I know where you keep your special cigars from Cuba, and I am going to take them.”
You couldn’t have run fast enough. You are already shooting for the stairs, taking two steps at a time as you speed to his room. You knew it had taken him a second to realize what had happened because by the time you got to his floor, you heard him yelling your name. 
You burst into his room, locking it quickly. It was only to buy some time, for you knew he had a key. You were giggling as you went to his bookcase, plucking out the blue, hardcover history book. You open it, and smile as you see the unopened cigars there in the deep hole where text used to be. Just as you close the book, you hear heavy footsteps reach the door and a jingle of keys.
You panic, needing to find a way out before he opens the door. You could run around him, but you needed a head start. You could hide and wait for him to leave but you knew he’d sniff you out. There was only one option left, and that was to go out his bedroom window. You hear the key enter the lock, and with a quickness you didn’t think you had, you unlocked his window and flung it open. Just as the door busted open, you crawled out. You grasped onto the ivy that clung to the school’s exterior and began to climb down. 
“Oh, when I get my hands on you, you are in for it!”
You look up to see Logan’s head popping out the window. He has a scowl on his face, but you could see the wild look in his eyes. You knew he was enjoying this, for he loves the chase.
“This is for taking my sandwich!” You yell, and continue making your descent. 
You hear the window close, which makes you go faster, knowing he is rushing down those stairs to meet you at the bottom. You could sense that he would go to the front door, so once your feet touch the grassy floor you run to the back door. Opening it quickly, you determine your next move. He is probably at the front, ready to intercept you, giving you the opportunity to hide somewhere. 
You rush to the hallway where many of the classes are held. You run into the first classroom you see, its door already open. You see the large oak desk at the back of the classroom, and quietly walk up to it. It has a space for leg room, so with haste you crawl in it, pulling the chair in carefully to not make any sound. 
Your heart was racing, adrenaline thrashing as you hid. You try to steady your breath, trying to keep quiet. The atmosphere has become eerie, the silence defying as you try to keep it that way. You try to listen for any other sounds over your pounding heart, when another wave of cognition hits you. You can see it clearly, where he finds you under the desk, hands on either side to block you in. You know you need to move on, so you go to move the chair, but you suddenly halt when you hear his voice boom nearby.
“Where is she?” 
You cover your mouth, trying to hold in your breathing as well as the gasp that almost shot from your mouth. His voice was coated in gravel, and absolutely primal. Even from afar, it was clear he was worked up, and it made you embarrassingly wet. 
You hear footsteps enter the hallway, heavy boots against the shiny wooden floor. At first, you think you may have a way out, hearing him pass the room you were in, but you aren’t so lucky because you hear him stop. You grip onto the book and your mouth, even though you know it will do absolutely nothing. You know he senses you, and it is confirmed when you hear footsteps enter the room. You hear him inhale deeply, exhaling with sigh only to turn into a deep rumble. 
“I know you are here.” He is slow in taking his steps, and each step gets closer and closer to your hiding place. 
He sniffs deeply again, growling this time around like he was a wild animal. “No point in denying it. I could smell you the second I walked into the hall.”
You know he will find you, and he will block you in. So you decide to take a risk before he closes in on you. You push the chair out far enough to crawl out, before standing up behind the desk. You put your hands up with the book in your left one, trying to show off a sign of surrender. 
“You have nowhere to go, dollface. No point in trying’ to run for I’ll snatch you up real quick.” 
“You must really want your cigars back to block me in like this.” 
He steps even closer, with him now standing right in reach of the book. He could easily grab it and take it, for he is much stronger than you. But he doesn’t make a move, staying glued to his new spot. You don’t know what’s running through his head, his eyes trained on you. It isn’t until he places his hands onto the desk that you take a step back and drop your hands. 
“You’re wrong.”
You raise a brow, not sure what he is getting at. “What do you mean?”
He smirks, leaning his body over the desk. “It isn’t the cigars I’m after. Not anymore.”
Your heart is in overdrive. You know the answer, it is becoming obvious. But you ask anyway. “Then what are you after, Lo?”
“I think you know the answer. Now it is a matter of will you let me take what’s mine.”
You want to give in. You are becoming more aroused by the second, but you are starting to really enjoy the chase. Seeing how much it gets him going, to see this side of him, only makes you want to push him more. You want to see what he will do, especially when he gets his hands on you.
You walk around the desk, book of cigars still in hand, getting closer to him until you are toe to toe with him. “What’s the fun in surrendering?”
He quickly blocks you in, the desk pressed against your back. He has the most seductive, but feral grin upon his lips, like he thinks he has won his prize. His head leans down to yours, forehead against forehead, before he whispers his next sentence against your lips.
“The fun is in what follows.”
His lips are on yours, desperate and needy. You can’t help the moan that leaves your throat, mind going hazy as his lips devour. You have craved him for so long, you want this to last forever. However, you cannot give into him like this. You will not make this easy for him.
One of your hands goes to the hem of his tank, fingers lingering before going under. He feels so solid, the coarse hairs on his tummy spread thick as you go to his left side. You can feel him shudder over you, and you try to hold back the smirk that wants to curve onto your lips. You move your fingers sporadically over the left side of his ribcage, causing him to jump back. This gives you the chance to run like hell.
“Hey! That’s unfair!” You hear him yell and it makes you giggle profusely. You must thank Jean later for letting you in on that little secret; that the broody, grumpy man with the metal bones was insanely ticklish. You wish you could turn to see his full reaction, but you are too determined.
You can hear him running right behind you, and you have never been more aroused. You shouldn’t feel so turned on by Logan chasing you around, but the thrill of the chase was seeping into your loins and you were addicted. 
More people had shown up around the school, meeting with friends to study or hang out for the evening. You were dodging people left and right, and everyone looked perplexed as they saw Logan charging his way towards you. Many of them probably assumed it had to do with the book you were holding, and while they would have been originally right, they are no longer even close. 
You don’t have time to hide again, not with him so close behind. You make it back to the stairs, hauling ass as you try to make it to your room. You can hear him right behind you, breathing heavily and grunting with each step. Your room is at the end of the hall, and you are basically flying with how fast you are running. The second you reach the door, you swing it open and throw yourself in before slamming it. You had gotten it shut, mentally pumping your fist in victory, but by the time you went to turn the lock, it was too late. The door flies open, sending you back a couple feet back as Logan stands at the door's entrance. 
“I have you right where I want you. No more running.”
If looks could kill, you’d be ash. He enters your room, closing the door behind him with his eyes staying on you. He takes one step forward, with him now hovering over your smaller form. The way he is looking at you makes your knees faint, for you felt you could hear what he was revealing with his stare. 
“I still know your weakness, Logan.” You smirk, holding the book up to your face to dodge any attack he was planning. It is pointless, you know, but it is the best defense you’ve got. 
“Do you now?” He walks towards you, in step with you as you go backwards. The back of your knees hit the edge of your bed, telling you that you truly have nowhere else to go. He is right on you, grinning now that he has the upper hand. 
“I’m afraid that book won’t save you from me.” He snatches the book, tossing it to the side of the bed. 
You are in for it. You don’t know what he is planning, and the element of surprise has overcome you. However, with the way he is looking at you, you guarantee that what is about to happen will be just as exhilarating as when he was hunting you down. 
“What do you plan to do with me, hm?” You let your fingertips walk along his chest, dancing all the way down to his side like you did earlier. 
He is quick to grab your hand, bending down to lift you up in his arm before tossing you onto the bed, following swiftly as he pins both hands above your head. 
“Don’t even think about it. I know you all too well.” He growls through his teeth. “As for what I plan on doing, what’s the fun in telling when I can just show you. Would you like that?”
You simply nod, breathless at how he is handling you. However, that wasn’t good enough for him, as he takes hold of your wrists in one hand so his other one can grip your chin.
“I wanna hear you say it, pretty girl.”
You huff, getting frustrated already that he is dragging this out. With your legs still free, you wrap them around his hips, your heels digging into his back causing him to grunt. Your lips are practically on his, faint contact making you antsy. “Show me what you’ve been wanting to do with me.”
Your lips are squashed by his instantly, hunger and desperation clear. His hands go to your thighs, grabbing at the flesh. With your hands free, they go straight to his hair, gripping and tugging on it which causes him to moan hotly into your mouth. 
His hands travel up to the hem of your blouse, pushing the fabric up past your stomach before his hands go under. You moan at the contrast, rough hands, that have been through so much running along your unmarred body. He swallows what you give him, groaning happily at the effects he was causing.
You are in heaven. You never thought you would be here like this with Logan. You never thought you would be under him at his complete mercy. It makes a shiver travel down your spine, traveling right to your core that is a heated mess because of the man before you. To be with the man you have pined for is riveting, and you could cry that he seems to return those feelings.
You don’t know what triggers your mutation, but it is sudden. Your vision goes blurry, a strong aura surrounding you. It is overwhelming, a whimper bubbling from your throat as you see what is about to happen. Logan releases your lips with a grunt, looking at you intensely as you start to shake. You feel his rough hands cup your soft cheeks, stroking them gently. 
Your cheeks feel hot, your vision turning you into a horny mess. Your hands grip onto Logan’s chest trying to ground yourself to reality. It’s too much. Your visions rarely last long for they are just snippets of future events, but this was different. It was as if you were in a trance, and could feel everything he was doing to you. You don’t know if it is your heightened emotions, especially with him right on you. All you knew is that pleasure was present, and you were starting to fall apart. 
“Hey, what’s wrong?” You can hear his demeanor change, worry laced in his tone.
“Fuck,” you couldn’t help but moan, unable to control yourself. “I can feel everything, Logan.”
There is a pause, hands still touching your face. A few beats later, he lets his right hand go down, only to stop at your thigh squeezing tightly. 
“Tell me what you see, baby.” 
The rumble in his voice intensifies everything, causing you to grip onto him tighter. “Oh God please don’t make me say it out loud.”
You try to look away, but his left hand shifts so it is grabbing your chin. He forces your head back up, bringing his face down to yours like he had in the classroom. His breath fans over your lips, taking in the way they move as sounds leave them. 
“I’m fucking you, aren’t I? Making you lose yourself on my cock? Is that what you are seeing?”
You can barely talk, too enthralled in your vision. You grab the hand that is on your thigh and bring it to the top of your black pants. Logan gets the idea and angles it so he can slide his hand into them. His fingers brush over the fabric, feeling the damp spot that has formed drastically. You hear him curse under his breath, the vibrations hitting your lips as they brush against one another without full pressure. 
“Oh sweetheart, you are so wet.” He murmurs, pulling his hand out to bring it up to his nose, inhaling deeply before releasing a sound so feral that you could sob. “And you smell so fucking good.” 
You can’t help but nod, not knowing how to respond. All you know is that you need him. Need him to take you on your bed and do whatever he wants to you. You’ll take anything he is willing to give you, for all you want is for him to make himself known to you. 
His hand had gone back down to your crotch, cupping your pussy through the material. “Does she want more attention?”
“Logan, please do something.” You choke, your mind steadily coming back to reality, but still not fully letting go. You start to grind down on his palm, desperate for anything he will give you, but he removes his hand, going to the back of your head to grip tightly.
Damn him!
“I know she deserves something, but do you? Do you deserve me after getting me so worked up like that?”
“Logan, I am begging.” You cry out in frustration, your nails digging into his chest causing him to groan lowly. “I want you. God, I’ve always wanted you so please take what’s yours!”
He is back on you, kissing you till the air in your lungs dissipates. He starts to kiss away from your swollen lips, kissing down to your neck. He nips at your pulse point, going up to your ear to give it a light lick before going back down. With every kiss, he takes a deep breath in, which only makes him get more aggressive. Soft kisses turn to an open mouth lather to nips that could have easily broken the skin.
“I don’t think you know what your scent does to me. It draws me in every time.” He bites down particularly hard at your collar bone, and you wouldn’t be surprised if blood had come to the surface. 
His hands come back up to the front of your blouse, carefully unbuttoning the garment before revealing your breasts that are almost spilling out of your bra. His hands mold over the cups, squeezing hard and slow as he makes his way to your sternum. 
He is being so gentle with you, a complete 180 from how you thought this was going to go. He was so rough with you in your head, fucking you until you couldn’t even say a word. This side of him was endearing, but you crave more from him.
“For someone so feral for me, you sure are taking your time.”
He bites the top of your left breast, making you gasp at the sudden pain. “I don’t think you are ready for that side of me, dollface.”
Your right hand goes to his head, taking a handful of his hair and yanking his head up. You know he wants to absolutely ravish you, and if it’s some convincing he needs, some convincing he is going to get. 
“When I said to take what’s yours, I meant it. I want you to make me beg until I’m dumb, so fucking do it.”
“Fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn you, Princess.”
His hands go under your top from the back, unclipping your bra before letting them resurface. He starts to yank your top off from the shoulders, only to smack your thigh that causes a light sting.
“Arch that back for me.”
You do as he says, allowing him to take the rest of your top off along with your bra. He flings them both across the room, only to do the same with his tank. You’ve seen his upper body plenty of times, as there would be instances in which he disregards it for a training session. But this? This was very different. It’s a different atmosphere, and rather than everyone getting an eye full of his muscular, hairy body, it is now for your eyes only. 
He’s looking down at you, pupils flared as he takes you in. You shiver as his palms stroke your tummy, slowly going up until they encompass your breasts. Your nipples pebble from the rough texture of his skin, and you can see it excites him. So much so that he takes the opportunity to take your nipples between his fingers and pulls them gently with a pinch. Your back bows off the mattress, adoring the pain he is providing, and let out a mewl as he lets go to run his thumbs over the tender peaks.
“You sound so good,” Logan murmurs. “I need to hear more.”
His right arm goes under your back to keep you up, holding you there as his mouth goes to your left breast. He takes your nipple into his mouth, sucking with his eyes still on you. Your cheeks flush, head tilting to the side to avoid looking at him. It’s too much. It’s too fucking much. 
Whimpers slip from your mouth, his treatment of your breasts making you want to rub your thighs together to soothe the ache, but he keeps your legs open. He eventually does the same to your other breast, working to match the work he left on your other nipple: hard, and tainted red.
He lets up, sitting on his knees as he unbuttons your pants, hands sliding the material down your legs in earnest. He tosses your heels off before stripping away your bottoms, and he hums as he admires the black, lacy thong you adorn. 
“Fuck,” he snaps the elastic, eyes entranced. “You sure you didn’t see this coming earlier? Wearing something sexy like this?”
“They work better with my pants.” You huff, his fingers lightly running along your covered slit.
“Hmm, no wonder your ass looked so good today.” He grins. “But this pussy? I could play with her all day.”
He lowers himself, sliding off the bed only to bring you with him, your body gliding across the comforter with ease. He clutches onto your thighs, letting your legs rest in the crook of his elbows. He keeps his hold tight, bringing his lips down to kiss and suck on your thighs. You gasp at the aggressiveness, swearing you will see dark purple marks on you later. You moan at the idea, as it feels like he is finally claiming you; like are his to mark, to claim, to fuck, to love. 
He makes his way to your center, sniffing deeply before releasing a feral growl. He lets the tip of his tongue lightly drag from the bottom to the top of your heat, still fully covered by the damned thong. He flicks at your clit, a ghost of a touch that has you bucking your hips. And he draws back every single time. His self-control is impressive but frustrating all the same.
He starts to suck on it through the material, creating a bigger wet spot with his spit. The more he pushed his tongue against your folds, the more the material would rub just right against you. It made you clench, panting at how much he is teasing you. He pulls away, blowing on your sensitive spot which only makes you whine.
“Awe what is it?” He chuckles, the vibrations barely hitting where you need him. “You want my tongue to play with you?”
His hand lets go of your thigh, fingers tracing the fabric before pulling it to the side. “Lucky for you, I love to play.”
He goes right in, mouth over your bud as he consumes your very being. Your hands shoot to his hair, not prepared for the onslaught of pleasure he is delivering. The swirls he is landing on his target is mind numbing, a tangible pressure that makes you want to curl in on yourself. 
“Fuck, sweetheart,” he groans, the sound vibrating right on your clit. It makes you buck your hips up, but his left arm presses you down to keep you secure. 
“I know you want more, but you are going to have to be patient. I’m not done tasting this sweet pussy. Fuck, you are so sweet.”
You feel one of his fingers near your hole, circling it teasingly before pushing in. His tongue is back on your nerves, mouthing covering it to add slight suction. Even with his big fingers, it’s not nearly enough. 
“Logan, please add another.” You say, emphasizing as you clench down on his single digit. 
He sucks a little harder, ripping a yelp from your throat. Still, he listens and inserts a second finger with the first. He goes in and out, drawing sighs from your lips as he builds you up. His mouth is going crazy, moving his lips with a vengeance. Your blood is hot, traveling down as your release starts to come to the surface.
You can’t stop clamping down on his fingers, your pussy having a mind of its own. He is pistoning them now, causing your fluids to make its way down your ass onto the comforter. The sounds coming from his handiwork edge you further, your release imminent. 
“Oh God, Logan! I’m cumming!” 
Big mistake on your part.
He pulls away, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. A smug look appears on his face, and you have the urge to shove his face back into your aching cunt.
“Your first time cumming with me will be on my cock, sweetheart.”
He pulls your thong down your legs and moves you back to the front of the bed. He stands before you, making light work of removing his belt from the loops of his jeans. His jeans are next, pulling them down with his briefs. 
You don’t know what you expected. You weren’t surprised with how well endowed he was, not with the way he is built. But to see it in person is so much different from your imagination. The details that your mind didn’t conjure up, especially the vein that starts from his lower stomach to the tip of his cock. It makes you salivate, wanting to run your tongue along it. 
“You like what you see, darlin’?” He noticed you staring, but you have no shame. Not anymore.
“Yeah, want it in my mouth so bad.”
He walks over to you, his cock in your face. His hand goes to your head, stroking the baby hairs that are starting to stick to your temple. “As much as I would love that, I am dying to give you the fucking you deserve, sweetheart. However…” he brings your head up closer to his cock, your lips not even an inch away. “How about you get it nice and wet for me.”
You don’t have to be told twice. You work up a good amount of spit, letting it drip from your mouth onto his hard cock. You start to lick at the sides, spreading your saliva all over until he is covered. You are basically making out with his dick, your lips and tongue moving like you had when you were kissing him earlier. It isn’t until you get to that vein of his that you start to go wild, licking it up and down. 
Logan is groaning deeply, and pulls your head back, a string of saliva connecting before breaking apart. You hear him curse under his breath before crawling back onto the bed, his hands holding your face as he brings his lips to you. His kisses are slow this time, letting it sink in that this is happening; that you two are about to be connected. 
“You did such a good job. You are such a good girl.” He murmurs against your lips before sitting up. 
His dick is now sitting heavy on your mound, and the weight of it feels delicious. He taps it against your clit a few times, your hips thrusting up in kind. 
“You ready for me, sweetheart?” He lets his cock rut into your folds, thrusting up into your clit. “I think that sweet thing of yours is.”
“Give it to me, Lo. I need you so bad it hurts.” 
“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll take that pain away.” He promises.
And as promised, he places the tip right at your aching hole and pushes in slowly. Your jaw slacks, the pressure as he continues his descent much more intense than you anticipated. It’s been so long since you’ve given yourself to someone. It all feels new, and you are thankful; thankful that it's with him.
He is fully seated in you, and you can only describe it as euphoric. With the way he sits heavy in your cunt, filling you up completely, you can honestly say that this was meant to happen. Logan was meant to be with you in every single possible way imaginable. It’s the only explanation.
“How does it feel, baby?” Logan asks, hands rubbing up and down your thighs soothingly. 
“It feels,” you whimper, gripping down on him. “It feels so good, Lo.”
“Yeah? My cock makin’ you feel good, doll?” He groans, clearly being affected by your behavior. 
Before you can mutter a pathetic answer, your brain turning to mush, he shifts back. His cock slides out until the mushroom head is at your entrance, and then he slams back in; hard and slow. 
The constant back and forth of his cock has you shaking, his hard thrust knocking the air out of your lungs and the slow thrusts feeling oh so good. And with the way he is watching you, his face mimicking yours as he receives his own pleasure, is sending zaps of electricity to your cunt. It makes you grasp onto him hard as he gets you more worked up.
Logan sits up straighter, grabbing your right leg and bringing it up to his shoulder. His left hand keeps it steady as he speeds up slightly and presses gentle kisses to your ankle in the process. It lets him go deeper, kissing your cervix every time it goes in. The pressure feels incredible, and the more he speeds up, the more your cunt starts to spasm out of control. 
“That’s it, baby. You are taking me so well, like you were fucking made for me.” He growls out, biting your ankle. 
“God yes, Logan! I’m yours!” You cry out, him and his cock making you utterly delirious. “You were made for my pussy!”
“Fuck, you got a mouth on you.” He chides, his right hand going to your right breast.
He is squeezing your tit so tight; his hips are on autopilot with how fast he is taking you. Your hands don’t know where to go, going from gripping the fabric below to holding onto his wrist. He is putting you into a completely fucked out state, and you can’t get enough of that treatment. 
You can tell you are on the precipice of cumming. You are clenching on and off rapidly, no longer in control of your muscles. The sounds coming from your coupling, wet smacking echoes that are music to your ears. You can feel the telltale sensation of being overwhelmed, and you know you are now on the track of no return. 
“Logan, baby, I’m gonna cum!”
He snarls at you, a crazed look in his eyes as he slams into you. He lets go of your tit to grab your chin, keeping your eyes on his. “Do it, darlin’. Cum around my cock.”
You are over the edge in seconds, a silent scream taking over as you tremble and quake. Your pussy is convulsing like crazy, small gushes of liquid coming out. You see Logan look down at where you two are connected, and he is grinning like crazy.
“What a fucking sight. There isn’t one thing about you that isn’t pretty.”
You could sob at his words, especially with how overstimulated you are becoming. You work his cock, wanting him to cum inside of you. 
“Give me your cum, Logan. Fill me until I’m dripping.”
Your words must have triggered something because next thing you know he has let go of your leg and face and is falling onto his forearms with his mouth landing on yours. You hear the sound of his claws, completely unsheathed from his skin, causing him to bellow into your mouth, rutting like a madman which causes cum to leak out from your hole onto the bedding. 
He slows down, milking out the rest of his spend before stopping all together. He lets go of your lips gasping, face buried in your shoulder as he tries to calm down. Your hands go to his back, massaging the taut muscles as he shakes. 
“Fuck, Logan,” you sigh, catching your breath as you come back to earth. You feel so relaxed, even with your guts feeling completely rearranged.
You hear his claws sink back into his skin, and it is then that he pulls out, falling to the other side of the bed. His chest is going up and down with every heavy breath, and you can’t help but admire him like this. 
He turns his head over to you, his hand coming to grab the hand by your side. “C’mere, sweetheart.”
You make it over into his side, head laying on his chest as you both bask in the post-sex glow. You can’t help but smile at this turn of events, not expecting to have been in this position with Logan. But here you are, laying on his chest with his arms around you. 
You notice something in your peripherals and see splintering from the headboard of your bed. There are six holes in the wood, and it sends you into a laughing fit, a euphoric glaze covering your entire body. 
“What’s so funny?” He asks gruffly, pulling you into side as you continue to laugh.
“Your claws pierced my headboard.”
You see him glance back, and you see him sigh, relaxing more into the mattress. “I’ll fix it up for you, darlin’. I’m sorry about that.”
“No need to say sorry.” You snuggle your face into his skin, breathing in his natural musk as you relax more into him. “I just can’t believe we did that, but I’m glad it did.”
“I can say the same.” He murmurs, stroking your hair gently. “Seriously, I gotta know, did you see this coming?”
You shift up, going to lay your arms across his chest only for you to rest on them. You look into his eyes and the need in them is still there, but not in the way they were before. They were searching, looking for any confirmation that what you both just did truly meant more. It makes him look vulnerable, something he rarely shows. It makes you smile at the prospect of him opening up even more. 
“Not until today. It’s strange now that I think about it.”
“And why is that?”
“I never saw you coming, I guess. Even when it is clear as day how you felt about me, I never got anything that told me it was real. I didn’t want to potentially screw anything up between us.”
He hums, a look of contemplation on his face before taking a hand and rubbing his face, a long sigh coming out in the process. “I suppose that’s my fault.”
You can’t help but look confused. His fault? “Why do you say that?”
“I haven’t been fully honest, but ever since I came here, no matter how welcomed and appreciated I am here, I have contemplated leaving.” His hand leaves his face to go behind your neck, lightly scratching the skin at the nape before continuing. “I’ve been alone for a long time. Having a family has never been in the books for me. It is easier to not let people in.”
“So, that’s why I couldn’t see you coming. You hadn’t made up your mind?”
“It’s possible, but it’s just a theory.”
“But, if that’s the case, have you made your mind up?” You start rubbing his chest with your palm, feeling his heart pulse slowly. You are confident you know the answer now, but you want to hear him say it.
He grunts in laughter, shaking his head slightly before letting his fingers curl around the back of your neck. “I think you know the answer, princess. But if you really want to know, come up here.”
You push yourself from him, moving so you are straddling his torso. He brings his hands to your face once more, pulling you down so you are face to face with him. He kisses you, slowly initiating intimacy with his lips. He isn’t saying anything, but you can feel what he is saying through the act alone. 
“I can’t close myself off from you,” he says between kisses. “And I don’t want to. Especially if you’ll have me.”
“I think you already know the answer to that, Lo.”
“Still, I wanna hear you say it.”
You pull away so you can look into his eyes, giving him all the sincerity you can muster. “I love you, and I want you to stand by me.”
He smiles teeth and all, and pulls you back down, kissing all over your face causing you to squeal. “Hmm I love you too, sweetheart. Always have.”
You both stay like that for a while, basking in each other's company in post-coital ecstasy by continuing to taste one another. Another thought came over you, and you can’t help but laugh again.
“If I had known sex would make you like this, I would have made a move a long time ago.” Logan jokes, breathing them in. 
“I’m sorry, but I’m laughing because it took me taking your cigars hostage to do it.”
Logan throws his head back, chuckling at what you presume is the same thing you are laughing about.
“Speaking of those cigars, can you grab them for me?”
You perk up, pushing away from him to lean over to your side of the bed. Your fingers stretch for the book, getting a grasp on it before getting settled back with Logan. He pulls you in quickly, hurdling you into his side. You see he has his lighter ready, which he must have grabbed while you were getting his cigars.
“You gonna smoke one?”
He hums, taking one out. “I only smoke these on special occasions. I think this qualifies.”
He carefully unsheathes a claw, cutting the end before it sinks back under his skin. He flickers the lighter, letting the bright flame linger on the end to get a good burn going. He then lays back, pulling you even closer into his side, before taking his first puff. 
You smile, laying your head against him as you let your eyes drift closed. You feel yourself drifting away, the smell of his cigar and the sound of his pulse lulling you to a deep sleep; a sleep with dreams that you hope feel like déjà vu in the near future.
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