#I’m crying I’ve missed tumblr
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boo! lume jumpscare coming to your feed because i finally found the time (and memory) to visit here. I MISSED YOU GUYS AAAAAGH i mean um hi or whatever,, what did i miss? how’s everyone? it’s been a hot minute.
#☁️ lume speaks#AND THE CROWD GOES HOME 🗣️‼️ LMFAO#no idea how many ppl are gonna see this bc i have a small audience + been ia for a while BUT#HI GUYS GALS AND NONBINARY PALS#we r so back!!!!#i’ve been on and off with life lately#been outside more recently & socialized like the functional participant in society i am#(i just came home from a social gathering. my brain has melted)#crying because i’m going back to school in late august i think and i don’t have much time to chill here WAAAHHHHH#totally not parasocial of me to be missing my tumblr mutuals dearly and being desperate to#to just. reach over the screen and hug the ever living daylights out of each and every one of you because i’ve been gone for THREE MONTHS#T H R E E M O N T H S !!!!#maybe more i lost count#from tumblr at least. hehe. but! i made edits during my absense so i’ll be uploading some of em here!!#look i’d write more abt what’s been going on but i do not want it to be a yap session for you guys BAGAHAHAH#in shorter words. been on and off with life but we r so back#MWAH MWAH MWAHHHH KISSES YOU ON THE CHEEK PLATONICALLY
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so not only was his ass not suspended (no surprise there) but there wasn’t even a fine. yea that checks out for this league
#don’t take this as me saying we’re completely innocent bc i’m not a hypocritice#but if we’re looking at this as an isolated case uhhh yes he absolutely deserved to be punished in some shape or form for his actions#i also don’t care if there’s no suspension as long as we get barky back healthy. i’d take that over anything else#he’s looking better but if he misses the next game while 29 just gets away with it…..#well. i can’t actually do anything. i’ll just be pissed every time i see him#the untouchable ed/m o/lers everybody#they cry about not getting penalties bc that’s how they usually (ha) score. then their fans slander barky saying he dove when he’s NOT that#kind of player. just bc that’s how your team operates doesn’t mean everyone else is the same#me.txt#i’m mostly referring to fans i’ve seen in youtube comments. idk about tumblr bc i have the tag blocked
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me after i finished reading legendborn:
EXCUSE ME, TRACY DEONN, WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO PLUCK AT MY HEARTSTRINGS LIKE A FUCKING GUITAR PLAYER??
[gif credit: @shegos]
#WHy isn’t there more hype abt this book on tumblr!?#that was rhetorical don’t answer that. i KNOW why :/#legendborn#no thoughts head full. i want to say so much more!! but#my brain is full of love for bree & garbled kettle noises only atm <33#man… this book is so refreshing & sooo good i’m cryingggg 😭#no fr i did actually tear up at several scenes. miss deonn is an EXCELLENT writer#& gosh that ending…. phenomenal#i picked up this book knowing only that it was abt magic & knew nothing else. it surprised me in a very very pleasant manner#hands down the best book i’ve read this year so far#i mean it has secret societies; magic obviously; centres around a black girl; is a story abt grief; is inspired by the legend of arthur and#merlin; impeccably done research & i’m definitely forgetting smth but — what more could u want???#i kid u not i was at the edge of my seat near the end & kept having to come back bc i kept going over the words so fast. OH the intrigue!!#i was so curious as to how it would all pan out; & that’s not all - i felt butterflies in my stomach (FIRST TIME that’s ever happened :D)#also i was laughing while i was crying but most importantly- the paaaaaaaaain. sharp enough to pierce my heart#id in alt text
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#ISTG if I missed an iteration I’m gonna cry#But I think I got all of them#I’m actually kinda intrigued on how this’ll play out#Since I’ve seen a LOT of ppl debating abt this#Tmnt#Tmnt polls#Tmnt 2003#Tmnt 2007#Rottmnt#Mutant Mayhem#Tmnt 2012#Tmnt IDW#Tmnt 1987#Polls#Tumblr polls#Tmnt Mutant Mayhem#I have no idea who to fucking choose 😀#Its either TLR or IDW for me#I just didn’t like them- like at all#They just was more of a random Sensei dude then a Dad to the turtles and it SHOWED
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one of the worst feelings ever is wanting to write but your hands hurt too much or the words just don’t want to work so you just sit there staring at a half finished doc with tears in your eyes bc you want to write and you need to write but everything is telling you that you can’t
#and that you’re a terrible writer and that no one cares aaaaaaand imposter syndrome kicks in and you just feel like crap#bc all your friends have been wriying recejtky so why can’t you??? cause they’re bETTER THAN YOU#lol idk why my head is so bad today#the feelings of inferiority and emptiness and idk worthlessness are strong and i hate it but i can’t stop it#i just wanna write!!! and like what i write!!!#but i Can’t and i haven’t liked anything i’ve written in Months and ugh i hate not being able to d something i wanna do#oh and now i’m crying??? why the frick am i cRYING litetally why is typing this making me Worse#sorry guys needed to rant#the inadequacy was strong today#something something students keep telling me how much they dislike me or how i’m whiny for asking them to be respectful and like#i Know i shouldn’t compare myself to my friends but gosh it’s hard when they’re all like. so much better than me.#and i don’t have a lot of time to be on tumblr bc of work so i just feel like i’m watching everything from afar and it’s no one’s fault but#my brain’s like no one is Doing anything it’s just my brain being dumb and i can’t stand it and I want to stop feeling empty and like i’m#missing a part of myself and like the words i write don’t matter gOD why can’t i just feel happy with where i am and not care what the kids#who hate me say or realize that no one cares that i’m not on much like i’m still Here and trying to interact it’s not like everyone hates me#for being busy or for liking side characters more than the main characters and just—#sorry#that felt good actually#idk what came over me#imma just. imma shower. then maybe delete my tags#sorry if anyone got this far aT ALL grace is either asleep or trying to sleep so i don’t wanna bother them since they slept poorly last nigh#okay done now for real sorry delete tags later sorry if you saw this and how freaking messed up ky freaking brain is
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I miss my friend, but it’s dumb because she probably doesn’t miss me.
#I miss going through her blog I miss reblogging her art I miss sending her posts about strawberries I miss sending her posts about deer#God it hurts#I’ve known her for years#She was one of my first tumblr friends ;~;#I don’t think she misses me though#I want to check in just to see if she’s doing okay but she probably doesn’t want me to#I’m crying as I type this#I hate that#I hate that it ended that way I hate that she thinks lowly of me now#and I hate knowing that she’d probably hate me if she knew I was studying to convert#I want to reach out to try to mend things but I’m scared she just hates me now and I’m scared that I was right back then#I don’t know what to do#Vent#Personal#If you’re reading this Mo I really miss you even though I probably shouldn’t
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Fanny, my sweet, beautiful girl
17.11.2012 – 14.04.2019
#my art#artists on tumblr#I cannot accept that it has been 5 years already#I know covid messed with everyone’s sense of time but it simultaneously feels so much longer and so much shorter than that#exactly five years ago I was holding onto my mom for dear life and sobbing as we watched lilo and stitch together#not the best movie to watch when you’ve just lost your first ever pet you know#and then I cried myself to sleep at the next morning we never mentioned her again#I know it’s because it was way too painful for everyone involved. but I do wish I was allowed to process that grief properly#instead of bottling it up and pretending everything was okay until I was reminded of her#feeling like my heart was being shattered over and over again every single time#well anyway. enough of that. I’ve allowed myself a nice long cry today and got most of it out of my system#and once I was feeling okay I decided to draw her#and I can count the number of times I’ve drawn animals on one hand so.. I’m not too sure about the result#but it felt like to commemorate her in some way.#so yeah. here she is. my dear girl. the best dog in existence. she was always so affectionate and kind#which I didn’t always appreciate bc of how young I was. when you’re a kid it feels like pets will live forever#never barked. never bit anyone. her only crime was chewing on my mlp and lps toys that I left out on the floor#but I’m grateful she did that. it taught me not to leave my toys lying around and to clean up after myself#she really was taken from me way too soon. ideally she could still be alive right now. but I’ve been down the road of guilt and regret#there was nothing I could do. I was a child. I can only hope that she knew she was loved right until the very end#even if I didn’t know how to show it properly. and great. now I’m tearing up again#I suppose it’s unavoidable. April 12th will always be a melancholy day. and maybe that’s not such a bad thing#it’s good to have a day when I can freely remember her and cry if I need to. it’s healthy. it’s better than crying every day#she never liked it much when I cried. always tried to comfort me. that’s the kind of dog she was. I miss her so much#when I move apartments and get a dog of my own I’m getting a spaniel. just like she was#well. maybe a different colour so I don’t end up sobbing every time I look at it. but spaniels really are the perfect breed#I mean. cavaliers especially were bred for love and warmth. that’s just what I need. it will be nice to have someone waiting for me at home#and while I don’t necessarily believe in the afterlife… I do hope that Fanny’s watching over me#spiritually comforting me when I feel all alone in the world. it’s a nice thought for sure#and hopefully she won’t mind me getting another spaniel too much. it will be done in her honour after all. to make up for my past mistakes
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I’m so tired and emotional, anything slightly positive you say will make me sob
#/neutral#I did cry for half an hour about an event ending….#BUT OTHERS DID TOO#ITS FINEEEEE#I’m just very tired#please say hi to me in my ask box if you see this#I’ve missed all of you little people in my phone#<- has only been gone from tumblr for 4 days#I could not survive without this app /hj#this is one of those unhinged tired rambly Jamie tags isn’t it#typing that name makes me so happy :)#I wish more people used it with my legal name#so like switching between them#but most of my cis friends don’t really get it#which is fine#but every time someone says it#it makes me smile#oh well#good night#and well done if you got to the end of the tags#have a cookie: 🍪#good night for real now :)
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#good morning world#i say to my like 7 active tumblr followers left from 2016#i’m having a very bad time recently#it’s not just bc of a man in all honesty. i’ve been having a real bad time for a while#and it’s not fair to pin it on him bc he’s genuinely an amazing guy#i had this dream he died last night and woke up sobbing and it took me a while to calm down bc i couldn’t just text him and ask if he was ok#so i’ve been up since like. 4 am. just staring at the wall#having BPD is never a walk in a park but i just feel like i am living in a constant state of triggered right now#i broke my lamp bc i got so fucking mad at myself and the world and i just spend all my time crying#i just feel so alone lol#even when i’m with people i feel a deep clawing loneliness#that feeling has always kinda been there but even more so knowing i have nobody to share my life with anymore#i just miss him so much#i wish he missed me too#i wish we could just talk to each other and work this out#the shitty thing is we probably could ! like it turns out ALL our issues stemmed from his avoidance which was crazy to find out#and i would have worked through that gladly!!! that’s my fucking best friend!#but you can’t force someone to be with you#even if every fiber of me is screaming at me to text him#i just feel like this whole thing was a mistake but i know he doesn’t feel the same
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AKJDDNDSJDBDJJSHDHSJAJ
#i have someone to match my j/atp obsessive levels LOL#bro also my irl crazy switfie friend <333#both of us fucking screaming and crying at this j/atp rewatch while everyone else was normal LOL#singing along to everything DOING THE PERFECT HARMONY CHOREO LMFAOOOOO#SINGING LUKES GUITAR RIFF IN EDGE OF GREAT#IM SO SAD I MISS THIS SHOW SM#AND LIKE I JUST REWATCHED IT YEAH BUT I MISS LIKE#IDK HAVING HOPE FOR A FUCKING SEASON 2#THE ACTIVE ASS TUMBLR FANDOM#i’ve been scrolling thru posts to send my friends who i just watched with#like the hope for s2……. the tag trending ……….. the last name reveal…………#i like also want to send them my favorite fanfics i feel so crazy lmao 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#what do i do when i’m reentering my j/atp obsession like however many years after it was fucking cancelled#*gestures vaguely at the pile of my love for this show* WHAT DO I DO W THIS FUCK YOU NETFLlX#;-;-;;-;-;;—;-;;—;;;;;;#and i doubt my friends who just watched it for the first time are gonna get as invested#BUT ITS OK I HAVE MY ONE FRIEND WHOZ ALSO CRAZY ABT IT LOL#🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹#i’ve literally been like running out of fanfic i want to read / struggling to find it but#i’m just gonna go rererereread stuff now LOL#oops i have already listened thru the soundtrack like 1.5 times since i got back#and i have made no move to get ready for bed LOL 💀#ITS ONE TWO THREE FOUR TIMES THAT ILL TRY FOR ONE MORE NIGHT#jeanne talks
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I’m crying, that’s such a magnificent description.
Fresh news from Hubble, and it's a real doozy this time: it found a runaway supermassive black hole.
Let me repeat that:
A runaway SUPERMASSIVE BLACK HOLE.
Half the universe away, an immense object born of concentrated primordial chaos, so powerful it once bound an entire galaxy together, hurtles through the intergalactic void. Its flight through the cosmos so unfathomably violent that it leaves a stream of newborn stars two hundred thousand lightyears long whirling in its wake. Gas and dust in the space between galaxies is spread so thin a particle might never touch another for a million years, and yet this escaped galactic core has dragged the matter in its path into fusion.
What a universe we live in!
#I should be doing my science hw I’ve procrastinated/accumulated throughout this entire semester but instead I’m DICKING AROUND on tumblr#autistic feels#late diagnosed autistic#late diagnosed adhd#actually audhd#actually autistic#actually adhd#actually neurodivergent#actually mentally ill#pissing crying puking screaming shitting /j /hyp#whyyyy#why am i the way that i am#space!#is it procrastinating or executive dysfunction#the world may never know#head empty missing assignments list full#i need an adultier adult#who let me make decisions
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Arcane preference reacting to a s/o with a mental health issues (eating)
My disclaimer, as someone with this issue, I’m sorry if this isn’t what you wanted. I’ve actually been thinking about it for a while, but I was a bit cowardly about doing it, so I’m taking the opportunity now. I don’t want to go out of character, so I’m sorry if some characters come across as harsher than others. Unfortunately, I know I should write the name of the illness, but if I post it that way, Tumblr will take it down.
Jayce:
- He’s academically intelligent, but it takes him far too long to notice that something’s wrong. But you can’t blame him, it’s something so far removed from him that he couldn’t have understood it sooner.
- When he does realize, his first reaction is panic.
- Jayce can’t feel like just a blade of grass; he feels emotions deeply, taking on any blame, especially if something happens to the people he loves. His first thought is that he did something to make you feel that way, inadequate.
- But once the panic phase ends, the responsibility phase begins.
- He does the grocery shopping, he cooks, and his workouts become more regular, where he has you climb onto his back while doing push-ups or holds you in his arms during other exercises.
- He doesn’t know why you do it, but the quickest way to show you that your weight isn’t a problem is by showing you how easily he lifts you.
- And maybe, if you feel up to it, he can hold you in his arms with one arm supporting you while he cooks, letting you taste various ingredients.
Viktor:
- Unlike Jayce, it only takes two suspicious behaviors in a row for him to understand what’s happening. It’s something far from his world, sure, but he recognizes it.
- And he confronts you. He doesn’t beat around the bush, doesn’t stammer; he might even sound angry because he doesn’t understand why you’d hurt yourself like this and willingly give up your well-being.
- I won’t lie, I doubt that an open discussion about something this delicate with him wouldn’t lead to at least one hysterical cry.
- But he’s not brutal for the sake of being brutal; his suffering and frustration turn into anger. It takes him a while to calm down, but he won’t accept compromises.
- You’ll have meals together at home, either returning to your rooms together or straight to the house, so no one can see you and you won’t feel bad.
- And he won’t force you, he tries to handle it with as much care as possible, but there’s no day that goes by without him getting up from the table if you haven’t eaten at least two food items per meal.
- He loves you too much to see you hurt yourself in that way, and knowing that he can't do anything about it makes him feel powerless.
Ekko:
- It takes him a week—not to understand, but to process it.
- Having grown up in total poverty, the idea of giving up food “for whim” makes him react in a way that is only human.
- And the whole thing is too distant for him: everyone’s skin is grayish, 90% of the population of the Lanes has missing limbs and monstrous prosthetics, and everyone’s goal is to survive as long as possible. What does it mean that you’re against your own survival??
- As unsupportive as he might be regarding the issue, he becomes incredibly vigilant and concerned.
- He’ll always make sure you’re warm enough, that you’re comfortable, and no matter how frustrated he is, he’ll always try to stay close to you, even just holding you in bed until you fall asleep.
- Every single comment you make about your body, he’ll respond with, “Don’t talk about my partner like that,”
- no one can speak badly of you, not even you.
Vander:
- The most understanding: he was young once too, and although in his size meant an advantage, he and Silco snuck into various galas when they were younger, and there, even though he never had these problems, he would feel a strange sensation seeing that he was the biggest in the room or that it was hard to find someone to steal clothes from that would fit him.
- He doesn’t lecture you or anything like that, he doesn’t get angry despite how he grew up; he just feels sadness for you that you can’t see how little that complex matters and how beautiful you already are.
- His compromise is vegetables. If you don’t feel like eating every meal every day, it doesn’t matter, but at least four days a week, you have to have three meals.
- And for the rest, he’ll cook, making sure to prepare the best dishes made from vegetables so that you don’t feel guilty and your body doesn’t deteriorate.
- But he doesn’t support your illness, he simply ensures that you get everything you need and never go below the necessary intake without having you feeling guilty about it.
Silco:
- Hoping that the most attentive and watchful man in the lanes wouldn't notice how, suddenly, meals go from moments of lightness to something you try to avoid at all costs is a bit foolish, but he says nothing.
- He waits for as long as necessary, basically to see how long it lasts and how much you're not planning to talk to him.
- When he realizes you won’t, not anytime soon, he waits for you to be alone in his office, where you’ll find a slice of cake on his desk. Sure, it’s a low blow, but it’s also the fastest way to get you to confront the issue without too many escape routes.
- He’s a big fan of the saying “dirty laundry is washed in the family,” so if you act strange about meals in front of others, he won’t allow questions or jokes, but in private, he won’t accept “no” for an answer.
- He has enough problems already without you crying from hunger pains or having psychotic episodes due to sugar deficiency, so as long as you're under his watch, under Zaun's eye, he won't let you live with unhealthy standards.
- During meals, he becomes the strictest. He doesn’t say anything, but one look is enough to make you think twice about contradicting him. In the evening, though, when your mental health is most fragile, he becomes gentler, comforting you as much as you need.
Jinx:
- You find fertile ground, but like any good bearer of the same issue: she feels she can do it, but you cannot.
- Being with her or in her space becomes like a live-action version of Thumbelina: she’ll leave sweets, chocolates, things she knows you like to encourage you to eat so you can’t hurt yourself.
- She usually forgets to eat herself when she’s caught up in her studies and work, but if she has someone to care for, it doesn’t matter how, she’ll make sure to remember. Even if it means setting a few colorful bombs with timers.
- She feeds you. In the most visible, worst way. It’s easy that if you turn your head, you’ll find a cookie shoved in your mouth unceremoniously.
- And every single tight-fitting outfit disappears from her lair. Magically, whatever clothes you pick up from her pile fit loosely, but if you ask her about it, she’ll claim she doesn’t know what are you talking about.
Vi:
- Want to see Vi in a panic, becoming super protective and possessive in a way? Just wait for one episode, and you’ll see everything you haven’t seen.
- She’ll check on you at least three times a day, and in the evening, when you have pain or a crisis, she’ll run back and forth from the room, thinking about everything she can do to help you feel better without making you feel guilty.
- During meals, she’ll hold you in her arms and insist that you eat, but not aggressively—in a way that’s almost frightened: she’s always been used to fighting big, real monsters, but even when it came to her sister, she could never defeat the invisible ones, and the fear of failing or hurting someone she loved again terrifies her in an agonizing way.
- Like Jayce, she’ll also try a more physical way of reassuring you, like body worshipping when you’re alone or working out with you to show you that your weight doesn’t matter.
Caitlyn:
- She doesn’t know how to react; she realizes it quite quickly but fears that by acknowledging it, she might only make you feel worse.
- One day, she gathers the courage to ask if everything is okay and tells you that she’s noticed those behaviors. When you open up to her, telling her about the issues, she doesn’t respond right away and simply hugs you.
- She becomes more caring, making sure that you don’t have to attend banquets or dinners where you wouldn’t feel comfortable, bringing you food in your room to eat together, and sometimes even leaving the room so as not to put pressure on you.
- When you mention a craving, she immediately springs into action to get it for you, even if you complain that you weren’t serious. Once she understands how your condition works, she orders everything in three portions, so she can eat with you and then be the first to say that she wants more, asking if you want to share the third portion.
- If you have fat accumulated in any area, she’ll knead it with her hands while kissing you, to let you know that she loves every inch of you.
Mel:
- She notices you're having a crisis before you even realize it yourself.
- She’s a ruler, but what she learned from a young age is that a leader must appear reliable and look good, so even if unconsciously, she too sometimes experiences small crises when she feels like she isn’t looking perfect.
- No conversations, no lectures, just an increase in cuddles, moments of intimacy, and later, she brings home sweets.
- “They were a gift to me today at the council,” she lies, but sometimes she says she got them for both of you. She doesn’t want to make you feel like you’re in the wrong. She knows that when you’re ready and if you want to, you’ll bring up the issue with her, but for now, the best thing she can do is help you get through the episode with euphoria, love, and treats that encourage you to listen to your hunger rather than the illness.
Sevika:
- Like everyone in Zaun, the idea that someone would voluntarily give up food is simply incomprehensible to her.
- But she won’t comment on your problems. She doesn’t intend to invalidate them, but she also won’t encourage it.
- “Are you sure? That’s a bit too little,” will be her comment when you eat something ridiculously small, before making you a proper portion of food herself. If you try to argue, she’ll respond with a smug smile, saying that if you eat that little, you’ll end up breaking when you’re in bed together.
- As much as possible, she’ll try to get the best, freshest, and most natural food, to reassure you that you don’t need to worry, but she’ll never insist that you eat if you say you don’t feel up to it. She’ll gesture for you to come sit on her lap and keep you there, occasionally offering you things she knows you like, telling you that she’s really craving them, and if you want them too, she’ll go get them.
- If a crisis is particularly bad, she’ll try to finish her work as quickly as possible to be able to stay with you for the rest of the day and not leave you alone.
#jayce x reader#viktor x reader#ekko x reader#silco x reader#vander x reader#jinx x reader#vi x reader#caitlyn x reader#sevika x reader#mel x reader#jayce talis#viktor arcane#ekko arcane#silco arcane#arcane vander#jinx#vi arcane#caitlyn kiramman#mel medarda#sevika#arcane x reader#arcane headcanon#arcane 2#arcane writing
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Hi, how are you? Hope everything is alright 😊
I've been out of work for a few days because I've had no power or signal at home since Friday due to a storm. I took advantage of the fact that I came to work today to check Tumblr.
This power outage gave me an idea (that you don't have to write if you don't feel like it): imagine if Billie is on tour and talks to her girlfriend every night after the show, but one day she can't get in touch, she gets worried and insecure. After a while, her girlfriend calls her and explains that she had no power or signal and that's why she couldn't tell Billie what was happening.
Have a great week!
a/n: hi my love, i am so so soooo sorry i didn’t answer to this before, i have been really busy:( but here u go baby, i hope ur okay, i love u smm!!!💕
Reconnected
Billie sits on the edge of the bed in her hotel room, staring at her phone for what feels like the hundredth time that night. It’s been a long, exhausting show—the kind that leaves her breathless and sore—but usually, the thought of hearing your voice makes it all worth it. She’s tried calling, texting, FaceTiming—anything to reach you. But each time, her attempts end the same way: a ringing tone that eventually goes silent, a voicemail that never changes.
“Hey, it’s me again,” she whispers into the phone, leaving yet another voicemail. “I’m just… I’m worried, okay? Please call me back when you can. I miss you. I love you.”
She hangs up and stares at the screen, hoping that this time it might light up with your name. But minutes turn into hours, and Billie’s mind starts to wander to dark places. What if something happened? What if you’re hurt, scared, alone? Or worse—what if you’re pulling away from her? The thought twists like a knife in her chest, her insecurities bubbling up to the surface.
Her hands tremble as she clutches the phone, biting back the urge to cry. She buries her face in her hands, whispering to herself, “Come on, Y/N… just pick up. Please. I need to know you’re okay.”
Finally, when she feels like she’s on the verge of breaking down completely, her phone buzzes, the screen lighting up with your name. Relief crashes over her, and she nearly fumbles the phone in her haste to answer. “Y/N? Where have you been?” Her voice comes out rushed, thick with all the fear she’s been holding back. “I was so scared—I didn’t know what happened to you.”
On the other end, your voice is warm and apologetic, but it’s the sound she’s been aching to hear. “Baby, I’m so, so sorry. The power went out, and I had no signal. I’ve been trying to reach you, but nothing would go through. I’m so sorry I made you worry.”
Billie’s breath hitches, her fingers gripping the phone tightly as her tears finally spill over. “God, I thought… I thought I lost you or something. I know it’s silly, but I just kept thinking the worst.” She lets out a shaky laugh, trying to collect herself. “I couldn’t stop thinking about all the things I should’ve said to you. Like how much I love you, how you’re my whole world… I don’t know what I’d do if—”
You interrupt her with a soft, gentle reassurance. “Hey, hey, baby, I’m not going anywhere. I love you so much. I promise I’ll never leave you like that.”
Billie lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, a relieved smile tugging at her lips as she leans back against the headboard. “Just hearing your voice… it’s like I can finally breathe again. Promise me you’ll take care of yourself, okay? I need you safe.”
“I promise, baby. I’ll be extra careful next time,” you say softly, and she can hear the warmth in your voice, the love that mirrors her own. “Now, let’s just stay on the phone for a while, yeah? I don’t want you to feel alone tonight.”
She nods even though you can’t see her, letting herself relax into the comfort of your voice. “Yeah, let’s just stay like this. I’ve got you, and you’ve got me.”
#billie eilish blurb#billie eilish fanfiction#billie eilish fic#billie eilish x fem!reader#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish x y/n#billie eilish x you#billie eilish fluff#billie eilish imagine
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✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ fic recs
CW: these works contain explicit content intended for those 18+. make sure to read the rules of the writers before interacting.
@peterthepark : coming back to this blog made me realize when exactly i started back reading fanfic fr. the moment that was eddie mf munson, touched something in me. reign was one of my first intros that really stuck with me. it kinda blew my mind and scared me at the same time because i was like…how do i move on…what’s better than this??? brilliance. creative genius. like what more do you want from me? reign, i miss you. <3
i rec literally anything she’s written about eddie or tasm!peter parker.
@ohcaptains : i really don’t know what to tell you man. leah. is. HER. she simply does not miss. funny story: when i first started my old blog, it was ageless so i ended up getting blocked. so i pm’d her basically begging to come back home because i knew what i had lost. i’m not ashamed.
"dealers choice" - if you happened to miss the moment that was eddie munson or you miss his character or you were never really into him, this lil universe is for you. <3
"learning in public" - carmy x fem!reader. he needs it. he wants it. he has to have it. a man on his knees. enjoy.
"don't you dare fall in love" - heads up this one was discontinued and will not be continued (so don’t go harassing her about it) but the last part has an open ending so don’t let that stop you. college student/dealer!ellie x fem!reader. it’s beautiful and perfect. enjoy.
also ALL of her frank castle, abby anderson, tasm!peter parker fics. thank youuu
@inknopewetrust : this woman is a W R I T E R. the beautiful angsty things that come from her brain need to be cherished. thank you for your service.
“hoping i’ll find [a glimpse of us]” - when i tell you this shit was so fricking good!!!!!?! another piece of LITERATURE that i couldn’t believe i got to read for free on tumblr. i am such a sucker for a angsty slow burn and this still lives in me head rent free to this day. the tension had me giggling and laughing and biting my nail and crying. i need to spin back. i need to feel something!!
“secret” : now this one was a sexy forbidden romance. eddie’s our man who isn’t our man but is and oh m gee the angst in this one got me too, though it wasn’t as much. preppy!reader x eddie munson iykyk.
@etherealising : the absolute sweetest person i’ve met on here. every interaction i have with her just makes me smile. on TOP of that she’s a beautiful writer and storyteller. vee you have my heart.
“all i ever knew only you” - the best carmy x oc fic i’ve ever had the pleasure of reading on here. i’m so emotionally attached to this series, its characters and i think it has such re-readablity . the characterization is also so well done carmy x baby 4life. it’s currently discontinued but she is currently doing a rewrite and it’s going really well! in the meantime, please don’t let that stop you from reading the original while it’s still up. you won’t regret it.
“a buried and a burning flame” - vee single-handedly has me looking a richie different now. like…wait a minute :)) the bickering and banter is so fun. tension? check. spice?? check.
“flew like a moth to you” - a continuation of the one above. babyyyy!!! yes, yes, uh huh 🙂↕️ these two? LOVE EM. he’s officially in my heart.
@totheblood : star is so kind and super creative. she has created some of my favorite ellie williams smau’s on here.
"the hard way" - rockstar!ellie williams x ex-gf!reader smau. you guys are brought together again to solve the mystery that is the anonymous account blackmailing the two of you. mmm, nothing like the takedown of a shady mf to bring the girls together again :)
@cherriesxinthespring : another sweetheart with a beautiful mind. ik people get the characterization/true nature of ellie so wrong, but not rosie. she gets it.
“wasteland, baby!” - the wlw true enemies to lovers slow burn i’ve been dreaming of. tap in. right now.
@elliesbelle
“nobody compares to you” : a deliciously angsty slow burn second chance romance (ex!ellie x f!reader)
all the text convos for abby and ellie.
@newasskid : this blog makes me so nostalgic. THE first fic series that i read and rebloged when i started my first ff blog, came from this writer. i honestly feel it was my first time reading fanfic that wasn’t a silly little wattpad story or imagine and i was honestly gagged. i was like, “this…this is literature.” what can i say? i love good ass characterization! and this one was no exception.
“hard knock life” - like i said i was gagged with how good it was. i read the first two chapters back in 2022 and i still remember the feeling i felt reading them. this new blog i’m making is a fresh start for me and a chance for me to get back into old fandoms. will be revisiting this one soon.
@lovelettersfromluna
"one of your girls" - biker!ellie/roommate!ellie/camgirl!ellie x f!reader ALL rolled into to this ridiculously sexy little universe!! i love these two so much :’(
"compass" - vampire!ellie !!!! my new favorite thing. the way luna writes her feeding on reader ALONE is the most erotic and intimate thing. my god this was hot.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
sending all of this beautiful writers my love and respect y’all are amazing and so important. <3
#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#steve harrington#steve harrington x reader#stranger things#stranger things fic#peter parker#peter parker x reader#tasm peter parker#spiderman x reader#carmen berzatto#carmen berzatto x reader#ellie williams#ellie willams x reader#ellie williams tlou#ellie williams tlou2#ellie williams texts#dealer!ellie williams#college!ellie williams#richie jerimovich#richie jerimovich x reader#the bear#fezco#fezco x reader#euphoria#black!reader
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Childhood Best Friend (16/07/2024)
turns out my bakugo obsession wasn’t over so i’m writing him to feed my delusions because I saw this one line on tumblr and I had to write a whole story about it; i wrote this at 2 AM so it’s not the most creative hehe but bear with me
1.5k words — unedited
The thought of having a childhood best friend that you can keep in contact with really drives me insane, not in a bad way though, because it’s the kind of friendship that I crave. I have no idea how much time both parties dedicate to each other to maintain a relationship for this long, and I might be jealous of some of my friends because they have this and mine isn’t as ideal as I hope it was.
“Katsu?” My five-year-old self say, “Would you marry me when we grow up?”
The crimson eyed boy looked at me, holding out that ring pop he’s been eating for a while now and basically finished, “If you’ll have me that is.”
According to his mom, I went around kindergarten holding his hand and calling him “my husband katsu” for a while, and he was always around to protect me when kids doubted what I said. He’d beat them up or threaten them with his explosions saying, “You’re all just jealous that you’re not her, but too bad she’s my wife now so piss off.”
I was always around him and he was always around me, we were literally stuck to the bone.
“Katsu, someone told me I was ugly is that true?” I cried in his arms for the first time when I was six, and he rubbed my head and let me cry it out.
“Whoever told you that must have no taste, you’re breathtaking.” He says.
“What does ‘breaktaking’ mean?” I say.
“Breathtaking. It means you’re so pretty you take someone’s breath away.” He smiles, “I’m also beating them up for putting this nonsense in your head. No one messes with my wife.”
“Don’t beat them up though, please?” I look at him, and his rubs my head and nod.
This all disappeared when I had to leave to move away because my parents found a better job. I held onto his hand and begged my parents to let me stay with him and his family, he also begged, claiming he doesn’t want to be apart from “his wife”.
“Don’t forget me, Katsu.” I start sobbing, “I really don’t want to leave.”
“Can’t you stay?” He asks, red staining his eyes because of the crying he has been doing.
“I can’t, they’re not letting me.” I hold his hand harder, “Promise we’ll meet again?”
“Let’s become heroes together. I’ll become number one and you’ll be alongside me.” He squeezes my hand back. “Let’s meet at UA.”
“Promise?” I ask.
“Promise.”
We pinky promised before my parents shoved me into the car and drove away.
“Hit harder, you’re not doing it right!” My coach screams at me. “Okay, take a break you’re not thinking.”
I sit on the ground, stripping off my boxing gear then throwing them to the ground, “Fuck.” How am I going to be good enough to catch up to him? He’s gifted, hardworking and talented. It’s not possible to be on the same level as him without training harder, and I’m not even hitting right…
“I’m done, let me do it again!” I say to my coach, who’s wiping the pads I’ve been hitting. She smiles and signals me to start. I throw I few punches at her, then a few kicks, and some more punches. “That’s the spirit, young lady!” She says as I throw more kicks at her.
“Good work today,” She pats my shoulder, “See you tomorrow.”
I smile at her before packing my bags and leaving, stretching a bit before I take a taxi home to revise for tomorrow morning’s tests. I take out the small notebook I keep in my bag and start memorizing some main points from the book, “Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.” I whisper.
I manage to get a taxi, I get in and sit down and continue studying. After a while, I look out of the window, slowly rolling down the glass after getting the driver’s permission. Feeling the night air against my face, I start to feel home sick. It’s been ten years since I left Japan, and I’ve been doing everything he would just so I can get in UA. And I miss him so much.
“Congratulations! You’re accepted into UA high school, we’re looking forward to seeing you on our first day!“
I scream at this news before telling my parents and they were overjoyed also. They willingly bought me plane tickets back to Japan and even called Katsuki’s family to have them take care of me for the mean time, in which they agreed to. And all I could think about that night was how happy he would be when he sees me again.
He was not happy, at least I don’t think he is. He has this scowl over his face and he’s gotten so tall and buff since ten years ago.
“You’re that loser girl I hung out with? I literally have no fuckin’ memory of you since you’re so fuckin’ insignificant to me.”
Wow. He’s definitely changed so much.
“Katsu, I kept my promise, I got into UA and now I’m back.” I say.
“So? What do you want me to say? Congrats? Yeah no shit, everyone craves validation when it comes to me.” He says, “Congrats loser, for making the bare minimum to get in like it’s fuckin’ challenging.”
Okay he’s just rude now, where was that sweet old Katsuki I missed. So I just rolled my eyes at him and went to their guest room to settle down. In which Mitsuki welcomed me with a whole party that Katsuki was not happy about.
New school year, new me. I wear my UA uniform, ready for a new school year with more fun and joy every year. Until some weird guy stopped me and Katsuki on our way to school.
“Hey girlie, you look so fine you should be called mine. Wanna go out with me?” He winks, and I cringed at him. Katsuki full on glared at him, looking pissed.
“She doesn’t wanna fuckin’ go out with you, why would she downgrade herself for a fucker like you?” Katsuki grabbed my hand and started leaving.
He told him off for me. He cares.
“Why are you even helping that whore?” That weirdo asked Katsuki, and he glared daggers into him.
“No one can say that to her when I’m around, say that again and you’ll lose your dick.” Katsuki threatens him again and wraps his arms around my waist.
He turns to me, his face so close to mine before he says, “Let’s go.”
Since when was his face so masculine and defined. He definitely had a big glow up because how could one be so breathtaking?
“Katsu.” I say, “What was that for? Thought you hated me.”
“Still do, but only I can degrade you.” He answers.
“Possessive much?” I joke, but I could feel his grip on my waist tighten. So I just shut up and walk with him.
When we got home that day, Mitsuki made us fried chicken and some extra spicy mapo tofu (katsu’s favourite).
“Remember when the two of you got married when you were five? Katsuki gave you his ring pop after you asked him if he’d marry you and he said something like ‘if you’ll have me’? Oh goodness I remember it like it was yesterday.” She chuckled with her husband as Katsuki and I stared at each other awkwardly.
“Shut up you old hag.” Katsuki says, his ears red, “I’m going back to my room.”
Before he leaves the table, he drags me with him and we enter his room before he locks the door.
“So,” He starts, “What now?”
I look at him, “You dragged me in, you tell me.”
“It’s nothing I just needed a break from them.” He shrugged, “It’s not like I’m fuckin’ embarrassed of us or anything.”
There was a moment of loud silence.
“Katsu,” I break the awkwardness, “Can we like start again?”
“Like what, pretend that you never left me?” He says, his tone sounded like he’s hurt.
“I didn’t want to, and you know it.” I look him in the eye, and he keeps the eye contact.
“Missed you so fuckin’ much and now you’re here,” He puts his head on my shoulder, basically whispering into my ear, “I hate how you’re my weak spot and how I can’t properly get over you even though we were basically children.”
“Katsuki, listen.” I hold his face and he’s so close to me I could feel his breath on my face.
“Yeah?” He looks at me, features softening.
“Be my boyfriend, Katsuki.” I murmured softly, “For real this time. I swear the only person I’ve loved is you.”
He laughed out loud, “Thought we were married all along, wifey.”
I hug him tight and he speaks, “Don’t leave me again okay?”
“Promise.” I chuckled, “Also you need to get me another ring, I might have left the ring pop with my family.”
“You silly bitch. You’re lucky I love you.” He gently smacks me.
“And I love you too.” I smile.
…“And now, I pronounce the two of you husband and wife.”
Maybe this childhood best friend thing that I had wasn’t that bad either, seeing how we have two children together right now makes me smile at our memories together as a child. My breathtaking childhood best friend and the pro hero Dynamight that I could call my husband until the end of time.
#mha bakugou#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugo katsuki#bakugo#bakugou x reader#bnha#my hero academia#drabble#nah#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugo katsuki x reader#i love him so much#bakugo katuski#bakugou katsuki#bnha bakugou#bnha bakugo katsuki#katsuki bakugo mha#bakugou x you
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Pissed (no this does NOT have any pee kinks)
warnings: smut ofc!, fem reader!, mean and toxic Rafe, dub con, Dacryphilia, choking, and, p in v. Let me know if I missed anything.
A/N: I’ve written fics before but it’s only for my notes, so this is the first fic I’ve written that’s being published. Criticism is appreciated! I would love to know how I can improve on my writing. Would you believe this took me an hour to write?
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This definitely isn’t repost worthy 😭 but if you do please give creds. @Loomiseater (Tumblr).
Written: April 21, 2024
Published: April 21, 2024
Summary: Rafe is pissed that you were hanging out with the Pouges.
“I go on vacation for a week! One fucking week! just to find out you were hanging out with those pouges?!” You could hear Rafe’s voice echoing from downstairs along with the door slamming. His footsteps were starting to get louder as he ran up the stairs angrily.
You cover your face with the bed sheets to pretend like you’re asleep. The doorknob twists as Rafe comes rushing into the bedroom like a maniac. “Get up! I know you’re not sleep” He announced while yanking the sheets off of you. “I know you heard what I said downstairs!” He shouted. “Why are you so pissed that I wanted to hang out with my friends?” You say softly. When Rafe is angry, it’s best to speak to him in a calm, gentle voice so you don’t piss him off even more.
“Why am I so pissed?” He repeatedly uttered to himself like he heard the most unbelievable thing ever. You got up off the bed to try and calm him down but he pushed you right back down. “This is what I get for trying to fix a broke bitch” He said in a chuckle to himself. Your heart shattered at his words. Rafe has always been mean during arguments or when he’s upset but he’s never spoke this ill of you.
“Are you serious?” You asked as tears began to appear in your eyes. “You’re an ungrateful little bitch, you know that?” He started off with a pointed finger. “I buy this big house for not only me but you too, I give you a weekly allowance so you don’t have to work, AND I took your ass out the Cut!” He yelled. It’s like his voice gets louder each time. “And this is how you repay me? Hm?” He questioned as his face got closer to yours.
You tried your best not to cry but the tears started flowing and the sobs got louder. His hand wrapped around your neck and the oxygen for you was running out. “You are MY wife, understand?” Rafe questioned as you nodded your head. You tried to move his hand off your neck but he only tightened his grip.
“I only do this because you’re not safe when hanging around Pouges” he explained as his eyes softened while moving some hair out of your face. Your chest was starting to hurt from all the pressure Rafe was putting on your neck. “P-please, let me go” the words struggled to come out of your mouth and Rafe finally released his hand from your neck. Nothing but choked sobs could come out as Rafe immediately apologized.
His face was filled with nothing but regret…this was the first time you’ve ever seen Rafe genuinely sorry. “I’m so sorry baby!” he expressed while moving his forehead against yours. “It’s okay” you say that but you didn’t really mean it. Deep down you’re terrified of Rafe. You know what he’s capable of. What he can do to you and get away with it.
“I just got into argument with my dad and- I took my anger out all on you” he explained anxiously. “No, really Rafe- like I said, I’m fine” you said while wiping the tears that were still falling.
“Y/n, don’t lie to me!” He said sternly as you jump a bit. He noticed this action and gently grabbed your hands. “Let me make it up to you” Rafe says while placing kisses down your neck. You weren’t really in the mood after what just happened. “Rafe. No” you say, unsure what’s about to happen next.
“Shut up, I’m making it up to you” he said while pushing you down on your back and leaving trails of kisses down your neck. It was like he didn’t care, but it’s always been like this. What Rafe wants, Rafe gets. He started places kisses to your exposed chest, you were in nothing but a bra and shorts.
You didn’t want this, you didn’t want to do this but your body was telling you something else. The tension was thick between you and Rafe and your body was heating up. Your bra was being unclipped, he then threw it to the floor, not caring where it landed. He gently grabbed one of your breasts and started sucking on your nipple softly while looking you in the eye. You didn’t break eye contact with him, it was turning you on even more. Soft moans flew from your mouth as Rafe kept sucking.
“P-please” You choked out as Rafe let out a dark chuckle. “Please what? You want me to fuck you, huh?” He replied with that stupid smirk he always has. He slowly slid off your shorts and felt you. “All that resisting just for me to feel how wet you are” he laughed. He was right, after what he did to you, you were somehow soaked.
Rafe flipped you onto your stomach and left a hard smack to your ass. You hissed at how hard the slap was and it’s like he somehow got even harder. His dick was straining under the sweats he had on as he was pressing against your ass. You could feel kisses being placed on along your back along with a groan Rafe let out. He began take his clothes off and get on his knees behind you as you felt him shove himself in. It caught you off guard, resulting in you letting out a loud moan.
“Shit you’re so tight!” He expressed as he through his head back. He didn’t even wait for you to adjust, he began thrusting inside you like a mad man. The room was filled with nothing but the squelching sound from your pussy and grunts from Rafe’s mouth. “Fuck!” You muttered to yourself. You didn’t want to giveaway how much you were enjoying this but you're pretty sure your wetness spoke for itself.
He pulled out and slammed back into you as you tightly grabbed the sheets beneath you. The familiar feeling was rising in your stomach. Rafe grabbed your hair and made sure your back was fleshed between his chest as he spoke into your ear. “Pussy so good, make me wanna put a baby in you” he grunted as you came all over his dick from just his words but that didn’t stop him. That was probably the loudest moan you’ve ever let out.
“I’m cumming! I’m cumming!” You shout as tears flow from your eyes from the overstimulation. Rafe looked down at the mess you made on his dick and it made him whine, almost cumming at the sight in front of him. He pulled out and turn you back on your back. With no warning he put your legs on his shoulders and began thrusting. “Rafe!” You moaned as he was sliding in and out of you. Yours nails deeply scratched his back which led him to slower his thrusts.
“Your so perfect” He said lowly. Nothing could come out from you except for sobs. “It’s too much Rafe!” You whined from all the stimulation. "You look so pretty when cry" And when Rafe saw you crying he let out a groan while cumming inside you. He began kissing you and rubbing your clit until your legs were shaking. It’s like he knew the exact moment you would finish. He pulled out as you squirted, letting his dick get covered in it while he began to thrust himself in his hand. This time, painting your thighs white.
“You did so good, baby” He says while placing a kiss to your forehead. You passed out on the pillow from your recent activity as Rafe got from off the bed and cleaned you with a wet hand towel.
#rafe smut#rafecore#rafe cameron#rafe obx#rafe x reader#rafe fic#rafe outer banks#smut fic#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron x reader#outer banks#obx x reader#obx fic#obx fanfiction#drew starkey#loomiseater
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