#I’m being really brave about it if you can’t tell
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mooshie-blue · 1 day ago
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Why Octonauts and the caves of Sac Actun is Barnacles’ character at its best!!
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This thread might be jumbled and not well organized I’m writing this on a whim, sorryy
As we know, Captain Barnacles is the brave Polar Bear leader of the Octonauts. He’s always put others before himself no matter what, he never let himself be weak around his team.
Even in moments where he was needing bed rest (Cone Snail) (Jellyfish bloom) he still found some sort of way to help. Throughout the entire series however, the only time he showed genuine fear (that I’ve seen) was in the Great Arctic Adventure:
And that was when his sister, Bianca and her cubs were swept up under a wave, but even then he didn’t dare hesitate and he swam like hell to get them into the GUP-A and steer the octopod above water.
Even here in Sac Actun when the GUP H crashes and Peso’s parachute doesn’t work, Barnacles immediately holds him and moves himself out of the path of the GUP H as it falls.
Even when he loses his Octo-Compass and can’t call anyone for help, he doesn’t give up, he and Peso follow some birds and they carry Coba over to a cenote.
Okay I’m not gonna do a play by play lol but what I’m trying to say is, nothing really presses Captain Barnacles to worry until he realizes he has to go through a cave to get Coba to the Caribbean Sea.
But even THEN after he sees how sad Coba is he still goes. He doesn’t bring up anything besides the fact that cave diving is extremely dangerous, especially since they don’t have the proper equipment (they actually almost run out of oxygen later in the movie and Peso cracks his helmet not too long after they get inside)
Throughout the movie, Barnacles has a different vibe about him, he’s usually infront of everyone on missions, he’s incredibly focused and as the captain he’s giving orders or suggestions.
He’s still pretty open and friendly as he usually is but the further they go in the quieter he gets, but Peso is pretty good at bringing him back without thinking.
And even when Peso expresses fear Barnacles, as he always has, gently brings him down to earth, even helping him fix his cracked helmet. And when Peso apologizes he tells him not to worry and to keep calm.
However, at one point Captain Barnacles gets stuck in a hole and acts very “out of character” and starts panicking and literally begs peso to pull him out, which is very, very rare for him.
And that’s when he finally comes forward about his experiences with getting stuck after ice collapsed beneath him as a cub and getting stuck for a long time.
And Peso, honestly the other MVP of this movie in his caring heart tells Captain Barnacles that he’ll be brave for him and this time asks his friend to follow him.
Honestly I’ll give Octonauts this, I don’t know any movie for pre-schoolers that tackles things like this. Of course, they touch on fears, but they always tell you to be brave. But as Captain Barnacles says: “You can’t be brave if you’re not afraid first.”
And it’s true! No one is truly brave without experiencing fear, the bravest people ever once cried for someone to hold them or save them when they were scared.
Even if Barnacles hasn’t explicitly said it, I feel like his experiences with helplessness, along with being raised as a polar scout, pushed him into learning to be brave and kind as he is now.
Bravery with the presence of fear is called courage. And that’s something Barnacles learns in this movie. Thanks to Peso of course.
In a later scene, Barnacles has to push a boulder that’s caught in a tight squeeze to help Coba, he hesitates but on the other side, his crew, his dearest freinds are cheering him on. And at this moment, he puts his fears aside, to complete his mission, but especially To help Coba.
And he pushes himself through the tight tunnel and shoves the boulder out with his polar bear strength. letting Coba and himself out. And he thanks the group for their help and Peso reiterates: “You’ve always helped us be brave, and we will always help you too!”
In a lesser movie, they would’ve made fun of Barnacles, or have his fear last for like 5 minutes, he might have gotten over it by the end, but that’s not really clear.
In later media his fear isn’t ever bought up so I’m assuming he’s over it(?) but it wasn’t bought up in previous episodes of the show. (Even in situations that would trigger it)
But in any case, I’ve never seen a preschool show respectfully and thoughtfully talk about trauma and how to help people with it Of course it doesn’t go too terribly deep into it, but imo, it doesn’t need to. Acknowledging it and having characters show support is a very good way to get that conversation started.
Now, as for Captain Barnacles himself, I believe this is him at his best because for once, he’s vulnerable, and he can truly trust the other Octonauts. He already could, but that was with handling other creatures or taking care of missions, but here? He trusts them with his fear, he trusts them by letting his guard down around him, and they stay with him and stay patient, even Kwazii who almost never has patience already knew about his claustrophobia beforehand, indicating that Barnacles has told him before.
Barnacles is able to feel completely comfortable. And that’s because he is a good leader to the Octonauts, he’s gentle with Peso and his fears, never once has he lost his patience with anyone, so why would they do that to him? When he’s always been a safe place for them. for the Octonauts, whether it’s by protecting them from danger or giving them a pep talk.
Another thing I really love about Sac Actun (And all the Octonauts movies in general tbh) is how, they add to the animation, the backgrounds are notre thurough and the lighting is very pretty, the characters are more expressive.
But they don’t change the art style. Infact, they embrace the art style the show already has, they add to it, the characters move more they express more, but they don’t add little bitty gritty details like fur, nothing wrong with movies doing that.
But I like that they take advantage of the new budget while also sticking to what made the original so lovable.
I don’t know how else to say it I just REALLY love this Netflix special, PLEASE watch it!!!
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emmawithtwoms · 2 days ago
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Potions Dungeon
@wolfstarmicrofic day 26 -831 words
Sirius Black had had many stupid ideas in his life: putting fairy dust in his mother’s tea, telling Snape about the secret passageway under the Whomping Willow, “accidentally” throwing a bludger at Slughorn during the last quidditch match… 
But choosing Remus Lupin as his potions partner during the lesson on Amortentia must have been the dumbest idea that had ever crossed his mind. 
To be fair, when they chose partners he did not know that they were going to brew love potions, but still, Morgana must have really hated him. 
All around him he could smell the scent of old books, earl grey tea, the Forbidden forest and fucking cinnamon. It was driving him insane. 
Padfoot could feel his palms sweating, his face blushing and his heart rushing, and why did nobody tell him of the arousing effect the vapors from Amortentia had? 
So he made a plan: he would not talk, think about or even look at Moony for the whole lesson. He would concentrate only on the potion, checking that the colour was right, that it was being turned the right amount of times, in the right direction and making sure that the right amount of ingredients was poured at the right moment and in the right way. Although it was Moony doing it, so it was hard ignoring his presence, his scent, and his hands… Merlin his hands, his beautiful, big, callous, scarred hands NO! He would not indulge in those thoughts. 
Sirius shook his head trying to remove everything regarding Remus and his hands from his head. Sadly, the other boy was not making it easy for Padfoot to ignore him. 
“Are you alright, Pads? You’ve been awfully quiet.” 
“Yeah, yeah, just… lost in my head a bit” 
Sirius kept pointedly not looking at Moony. The smell from all the Amortentia in the room was so strong and so enveloping that he was sure that if he had looked at Remus, he would have confessed eternal love. 
Remus placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him. 
“Is it because of your brother? If you need anything I am here, you know? Mulciber could “accidentally” drop a bit too much fairy dust and cause an explosion, accidentally ending the lesson earlier, you know?” 
Oh that beautiful, beautiful man, Sirius could melt because of him.
“No, I’m fine, really. I just can’t wait for this stupid lesson to be over. I fucking hate love potions.” 
“Oh. Yeah, I get it. And smelling this intensely the person you are in love with is very… distracting.”
Sirius finally lifted his gaze to look at Remus.
Right. The person you are in love with… he didn’t think about it, but surely Remus would smell someone too in the potion. Someone else. 
“Do you smell someone in particular, Moony?”
Please don’t, for the love of Merlin
“I… Yes I do.”
Those words stabbed Sirius right in the guts.
“Well, they must be very special to have you looking like that.”
Remus had a sad smile on his lips, like he resigned himself, like he felt hopeless. 
“Yes, he is.”
HE?
“I know he will never like me back, but I just can’t help it. He’s too important, too special. Even if he sometimes cannot see it, he is one of the best people I know.” 
“Don’t say that, Moons, everybody would be lucky to have you.” 
“Oh come on, you are my best friend, you have to say that.” 
“No, I’m serious, pun not intended. You are amazing Moony. You are kind, smart, brave, strong, funny and an evil mastermind. And honestly, you are rather beautiful, so if he can’t see it, sorry but he’s just not worth your time.” 
Remus stared at him in disbelief. The hand that was still on his shoulder tightened, his eyes glistened and he opened his mouth like he wanted to say something, and Sirius, just for a second, indulged in the fantasy of a heartwarming love confession. 
But they were rudely interrupted by Slughorn, who announced the end of the lesson, and all the students hurried to bring samples of their potions to his desk, including Moony. 
While leaving the potions dungeon to head to dinner, though, Remus called Sirius back, leaving them behind from the group. 
“Pads, thank you for what you said earlier, you… you are really special.” 
Remus was not looking at him in the eyes and picking at his cuticles. 
“Moons, that was just the truth. Stop doing that with your fingers, you’ll hurt your hands.”
And without thinking about it, he took Remus’ hand in his and smiled at him, and he just… didn’t let go. Not until they reached the Great Hall, and not while they were eating, still with their pinkies intertwined during dinner, and not while climbing the stairs back to their common room. 
They both knew that they should have talked about it, but for now, for now it was fine just like that. 
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dark-elf-writes · 11 months ago
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Screaming at a god who will not answer for mercy I will not find (want to write and have no words)
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shima-draws · 2 years ago
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Told my boss that NO I cannot take over customer phone calls because my anxiety will literally not be able to take it. And I’m being SO brave about it,
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ectoplasmer · 10 months ago
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in the middle of reading the new wind excerpt and god. oh my god. someone sedate me
#AGHHHHHH frostpaw. my baby :(#she spent a wholeeee book building up her courage to approach and accept what actually happened to her and her mother and her clan#she spent a whole book recovering and coming to terms with and understanding what she had to do#she spent a whole book preparing herself to save her clan and prove herself and it just Blows Up In Her Face within one gathering. crying#and the way splashtail just undermines her right in front of her clan?? telling them she must be psychotic or having a breakdown of somesor#that she must be confused and lost and hurt over her mother’s death and how they can’t trust what she says because of that#babying her in front of everyone right to her face. fucked up man#i mean she is Baby but i believe she is actually full grown by this point and is at the age where she would usually be made full medicineca#it’s just. god. everyone not trusting her. everyone throwing accusations at her. everyone not even giving her the time of day#so messed up!!! i’m going to go cry about it now bye#YES i’m getting emotional over a series meant for 6th graders leave me alone!! /hj#delete later#but like man. everyone in her clan rejected her. even her own family?? her siblings???? MOTHWING????#i know they can’t really do anything and riverclan wants stability but. man she’s just a baby. she’s still an apprentice cut her some slack#at least frostpaw will be with shadowsight#they can bond over their shared trauma of being led on by someone and getting almost killed by said someone#….weird how that happened twice within two arcs#inherently doomed medicine cats my beloveds. you are everything to me and you deserve so much better god damnit#listen i loved what the erins did with bristlefrost last arc but they cannot do that to me again#good on them for being brave and killing off a protag but no!!! not with these ones this time!!!!!#anyway
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madigoround · 2 years ago
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So quick update I guess talking to myself so I don’t go crazy and because parasocial relationships go both ways and it feels like I have support this way? Lol but I got to my home like ten minutes before I was supposed to meet my realtor and the seller was still here with their kids so I just went around the block a few times and they left and my realtor got here and we were walking around inside and we flicked the lights and…no power. Even though it was set to start yesterday. So I called the power company and it took like 25 minutes to get through to a real person and they said their system had a lapse and even though it said I was supposed to have power yesterday it just didn’t start the electricity because of their system failure and they asked when I would like someone to come out and I said as soon as possible and she said someone would be here between 6 and midnight and they wouldn’t call me to give me a heads up I just had to be here to let them in whenever they showed up. So now I’m sitting in my empty house in the dark with no power and no way to charge my phone and the place I’m currently staying is an hour away I was going to stay here for a few hours and clean and then go back there to pack up my things for actually moving some of my stuff tomorrow so I could stay here this weekend. And I’m trying to convince myself this isn’t a bad sign from the universe or something and is instead just like bonding time with my home.
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sailforvalinor · 1 year ago
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#oohhh girlies in my phone I’m really in it now#I went to talk about this in the tags last night but then I rambled so much I HIT THE TAG LIMIT LOL#but um basically I got re-acquainted with a boy I was friends with when I was nine only to discover that I still have a crush on him???#MAYBE??? I DON’T KNOW????#I genuinely don’t know if I actually do or if I’m just thrilled to find a guy I can talk to like a normal person who doesn’t make me want#to dig a hole in the ground and hide (this is not a dig at the menfolk I’m just nervous around guys my age for some reason)#it’s such a rarity you know???#I just I don’t know aaaaaaaaaahh#I don’t often find people that I’m on the same wavelength with like that. like a kindred spirit thing#and like one thing is he IS a year and a half or so younger than me which is slightly awkward now but won’t be in even just a year or so#my family (in their usual fashion) have tossed him up to me as a potential option multiple times this week and I haven’t been as adverse as#I usually am to their suggestions so like. I think they can TELL haahahahhahahaha#like it doesn’t matter I guess because I’m going on an exchange program and I won’t see him again until next year anyway#but it’s been two days and I can’t stop thinking about it#also the other thing is I don’t have his number but my brother has it and like I’m not going to ask for it because a) my brother would make#fun of me relentlessly and also b) what would I even do with it I’m not that brave#I am perfectly content with just being friends for the moment but I don’t want to let that friendship atrophy in the whole year we don’t#see each other but!!! I’m too awkward!!!#but. anyway. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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fastandcarlos · 26 days ago
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On The Mend : ̗̀➛ Oscar Piastri
summary: with your lack of presence in the paddock, fans are starting to worry, little do they know that you happen to be a little broken back at home
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oscarpiastri: another successful week of racing, super proud of the whole team to get the car all the way to P2 this weekend 🏆🏎️
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username1: congratulations oscar, such an awesome drive!!
username2: just a shame that yn wasn’t there to see it once again 🙄
landonorris: so proud of you osc 😭😭😭
username3: surely they can’t still be together, she hasn’t shown her face in weeks…
charles_leclerc: mum is very proud that the two of us were on the podium btw
oscarpiastri: @/charles_leclerc it was all thanks to her pep talk ofc
username4: we’ll still support you osc even if yn won’t
mclaren: the whole team is so proud of you, congratulations oscar!
username5: enjoy the celebrations, I’m sure the team will be there for you at least 🥲
danielricciardo: congrats brother, always nice to see you repping for down under
username6: either something must be seriously wrong or yn really just doesn’t care anymore 😭
maxverstappen1: hell of a drive from you, great to see you back where you belong!
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ynusername posted two private stories
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georgerussell63: thanks for reminding everyone I got a penalty yn 😂😂
oscarpiastri: make sure you’re resting, you don’t need to worry about the race sweetheart!!
ynusername: I’ve never missed a race of yours 😩
danielricciardo: why tf are you in hospital and why didn’t you tell me immediately so that I could help!!
nicolepiastri: sending you lots of love sweetheart, sorry we can’t be there to help you 💕
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oscarpiastri: I promise to sneak you in loads of snacks as soon as I’m there 💞
lilymhe: I miss you so much, hope you’re recovering well girlie
landonorris: he’s on the first flight outta here straight back to you 🧡
carmenmmundt: sending you all the healing vibes in the world ❤️
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oscarpiastri: wish me luck on the flight, some weird passenger keeps looking over their shoulder at me 👀
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username7: that poor pilot having to drive these two home lmao
danielricciardo: now you get to experience my struggle before you came along 😭
oscarpiastri: @/danielricciardo idk how you ever did it 🤦🏻
username8: at least oscar has lando to celebrate with even though others have abandoned him
alex_albon: why else do you think we offered to take you home on our plane instead?! 😂
username9: i wonder if he's going home to yn being there or not
charles_leclerc: you're incredibly brave volunteering to travel home with him 👏🏻
username10: yn should be there with him, i really hope that they're okay
username11: what would we do without these two in our lives!?
maxverstappen1: we tried to talk you out of it but you didn't listen 🤷🏻
username 12: i love how all the boys are exposing lando as a terrible travel partner hahah
landonorris: stop trying to make it sound like we're not bffs osc 💔
oscarpiastri: @/landonorris that's because we're definitely not best friends
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oscarpiastri: seeing as some people want to make it their business, we thought we’d share why yn hasn’t been around recently. a couple of weeks ago she had a nasty fall at home which resulted in a broken leg. yesterday I finally got to bring her home and begin helping her with recovery…just call me doctor piastri from now on 🧑🏻‍⚕️💞
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username13: i hope all you losers who thought they broke up are proud of yourselves 🙄
landonorris: you guys know where i am if you need anything!!
georgerussel63: we love you yn, make sure you get plenty of rest ❤️❤️❤️
username14: sending you so much love yn, get plenty of rest
ynusername: apologies in advance for the lack of sleep you're about to get because of me 😂
oscarpiastri: @/ynusername as long as you're healing idc 🥹
username15: can't believe some of you were so stupid to ever think they'd actually break up
alex_albon: glad to see you're back at home where you belong yn
danielricciardo: do i even want to ask how she managed to break her leg??
oscarpiastri: @/danielricciardo if I told you I don't think you'd believe me 😂
username16: poor oscar looks exhausted having to drive and take care of yn too
charles_leclerc: pls tell me I get to sign the cast ✍️
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc i'll save a spot just for you
username17: please make sure you take care of yourself yn and ignore what everyone has to say
carmenmmundt: sending you so many healing vibes yn, we miss you at the paddock
username18: during a time when they need privacy and instead they've been hounded by nosey idiots 🤦🏻
maxverstappen1: can't wait to see all the doctor piastri content from you! 😂
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oscarpiastri: the only way to get her out of the house atm is to bribe her with coffee ☕️
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username19: it's adorable how much oscar cares about her 🥰
lilymhe: tell her im omw with coffee as we speak to get her out again!
username20: it's so good to see yn back up on her feet and moving around again 🤩
alex_albon: i actually forgot what yn looked like stood upright for a moment
username21: why does it feel like oscar is one of those partners who is constantly checking on her making sure she's doing her exercises and following every single bit of advice
maxverstappen1: yn's injury is really making you look like the doting boyfriend rn ❤️
danielricciardo: if yn ever gets bored of being entertained on a walk by you, you know where i am!
username22: i bet yn can't wait for race weekend again to get rid of the nagging doctor 😂
landonorris: wish you looked after me as well as you look after yn
oscarpiastri: @/landonorris just a shame that we're not dating then really huh?!
username23: anyone else noticed how many drivers have been round this week to take yn out and make sure she's staying active too
username24: @/username23 i think she might just be the most popular wag on the grid
ynusername: i hate you but i love you at the same time these days 💞
oscarpiastri: @/ynusername if the doctor says you keep moving, it's my job to make you move 😂
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ynusername: I always knew oscar was secretly boyfriend coded but damn having him look after me is making me fancy him all over again 🔥
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username25: i think i might've just fallen in love with him all over again too 😍
alexandrasaintmleux: make the most of all of the attention you're getting girl
ynusername: @/alexandrasaintmleux oh I am, he doesn't let me lift a finger 😘
username26: soft, doctor boyfriend oscar might just be my new favourite thing
charles_leclerc: if i see many more of these posts from you i might just need a sick bucket 🤮
username27: yn you really are the luckiest having this guy in your life
carlossainz55: i always knew he was a softie deep down 🥺
oscarpiastri: you know i'd do anything as long as it meant getting you better again
ynusername: @/oscarpiastri you're an angel in disguise i swear
username28: i'd break my leg too if it meant oscar piastri was there to look after me 😂
username29: it melts my heart to see how caring oscar has been over the past few weeks
danielricciardo: even i found myself getting a bit excited when i saw these photos yn
username30: everyone needs an oscar piastri in their life
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ynusername posted two stories
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landonorris: you're ruining oscar's image with every post you share these days 😂
oscarpiastri: there's nowhere else that I'd rather be
ynusername: we'll pretend you didn't complain that it wasn't race weekend first thing this morning shall we???
carmenmmundt: hope it's good news, lemme know how you get on!!
alex_albon: praying for you and hoping that it's the beginning of the end now 💕
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danielricciardo: thinking of you guys, tell the doctor if he doesn't give you good news i'll break his leg 💞
ynusername: something tells me you might find a few challenges in doing that hahah
georgerussell63: you're so strong yn, just remember we love you
charles_leclerc: the whole family is hoping for good news for you and oscar ❤️
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ynusername: the moment i've waited for for so long, back in my second home of the garage and back supporting my love during race weekend
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username31: make sure you keep taking care of yourself yn!! 💕
oscarpiastri: cannot begin to tell you how happy i am to have you back with me again ☺️
ynusername: @/oscarpiastri the best feeling in the world being able to cheer you on again
danielricciardo: ik just how much this means to you, welcome back to us yn
username32: it's so good to see you right back where you belong again
username33: it feels like you've never been away, I'm so happy for you guys 🥹
charles_leclerc: on the mend at last, i hope you know just how many people can't wait to welcome you back this weekend
username34: we love our favourite #81 fan 🧡
iamrebeccad: i am hurrying over to that mclaren garage as fast as i possibly can rn ‼️
username35: so happy to see you back on your feet and back with our favourite duo again
username36: this is the content we've been waiting for, it's so good to see you back
landonorris: as much as i hate having to share oscar again, it's a joy to have you back 🙃
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˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗
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luveline · 10 months ago
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𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡? | 𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐧
you finally work up the courage to kiss Eddie for the first time and he can’t cope (even if he claims he can). 2k words. requested here
cw fem!reserved/shy!reader, first kiss, heavy kissing, mutual pining, eddie being a hot dork
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Some people (Steve) call Eddie your loser boyfriend, while other people (the girls at work) call him the rockstar. 
You see both sides of him now. 
“Sweetheart!” he calls, the passenger seat window rolled down, his voice strong where he shouts behind the wheel. The van bumps the curve, leaving a sanguine line of rust in its wake and a creak to make everybody on the sidewalk wince. 
“Hello,” you call back. 
The van hums. You wait for him to be at a definite stop before you approach, hands on the open window, leaning up so as to see him best. It’s not just a usual date night tonight, Eddie’s taking you to Indianapolis for a rock show, and he’s dressed the part. “Woah, you look cool,” you say, bravely, wondering if that’s the right thing to say. It’s undoubtedly true —he’s slicked his curls with mousse to define them and leave them pitch black in accordance with his eyeshadow, dark and tapped into his lash line. The top he wears is incredibly tight, carving the softer lines of his abs for anyone to see, and his black jacket is ripped in places to expose the ink of his tattoos. “Are they multiplying?” 
“What?” he asks, grinning at you. “Are you getting in? It’s freezing!” 
“Your tattoos,” you explain, opening the door and popping up into the van with one shoe on the step. 
“Shit, you wanna see?” 
You’re not scared of Eddie, you just like him. He doesn’t worry you, doesn’t pressure you, nothing nefarious about him. He’s pretty, he’s considerate, and he does stuff like this, peeling out of his jacket to flex his arm at you and show you the Saran wrapping around his bicep. “Like that one?” he asks.
He has nice arms, and they’re all the better for his painful obsession. His newest one is difficult to see well under the wrapping. He notices you squinting and moves it up, tape pulling his skin. 
“Another bat?” you ask. 
“Not cool?” 
“So cool,” you disagree. This bat is unlike the others on his arm, which are small and simple in comparison. This one is heavily detailed and very dark, fangs in small triangles bared. The eyes aglow. The skin around it is red. “Did you get that today?” 
“On a whim. Still wanna date me, or is it getting to be too much?” 
You can’t answer him, and he knows that. You’re not very good at navigating intimate conversation or circumstance, though you like him, and he must know that too. Or he must really like you. Your dates have been chaste. Only last time could you work up the courage to take his hand, but when you had, he rewarded your courage with a drove of tenderness, fingers rubbing your knuckles and squeezing soft patterns for hours at the back of the movie theatre. 
The drive to Indianapolis takes near enough an hour. Eddie puts you on map duty but doesn’t use it, ignoring your offer of directions on the insistence that he knows a shortcut and then rerouting when you get too lost. He tells you there are snacks for you in the centre console and laughs, endeared, when you pop the lid and smile at it all. You talk about the show, a band you’d never heard of but had wanted to see on the grounds of sharing his interests. That’s what couples do, right? They try to do things together. You have to put yourself out of your comfort zone, and you’re happy to try if it means you can do it with him. 
“You nervous?” he asks, pulling into the parking garage outside of the venue, a towering, multi-story fiasco crammed with cars and motorbikes. 
“No,” you say, not quite mumbling as you look down at your hands. 
“Good, don’t be. I’m gonna look after you, we’re gonna have a great time. And then we can get takeout after?” You look up. He stretches his arm out to glance at his watch. “I would’ve taken you before, but good old Indianapolis keeps getting further away.�� He smiles apologetically. 
You laugh without meaning to. His smile ramps up a notch. 
“I love when you laugh. You have such a cute laugh,” he says. 
“I know you’re lying,” you say, still laughing anyways. 
“I’m not lying, I love the way you laugh!” He shakes his head, curls falling away from his face as he flicks on the light on the car roof. “We have half an hour till doors open.”
“You don’t wanna line up?” 
“It’s kind of overwhelming and I figured we’d stay near the back of the crowd for your first gig here, it gets pretty rowdy.” He says ‘pretty rowdy’ like a drag, nodding gently, eyes lit with mirth. You love it when he talks like that. 
“We can go now, get further in. I can handle it.” 
“It’s not about handling it, I want you to have a good time. Plus, they could ruin your nice dress.” 
You meet his gaze all smiles like he is, but heat flickers in your chest and in your stomach, and you have to look away. It’s an impulse you’ve always given into. You’re reserved in the feelings department but trying not to be, Eddie deserves reciprocation, but it’s hard. Either way, he seems to understand this about you, and he hasn’t complained. 
Still, a bedraggled silence falls. Nearly awkward, unsure of how to tread, you sit together in your separate seats listening to cars parking and doors opening, closing on either side of you, the headlights of the cars driving past glaringly bright, white flashing over your screwed palms. 
“You okay?” he asks. 
You’re sure Eddie wants to kiss you. Three nights ago at the movies, after an hour of languid hand holding, he’d looked at your lips no less than three times as he said good night. He told you he’d had an amazing time, and that he couldn’t wait to see you again. You’d said the same in earnest, and then he’d just walked away. All those stolen glances and he hadn’t made a move. 
“Eddie… why…” You poke your tongue into your bottom lip momentarily, chewing it over. “Why haven’t we kissed yet?” 
“Um–” He lets out a nervous giggle before roughly clearing his throat. You peek at him, watching intently as he takes his hair away from his face with two hands. “I’m just waiting on you, sweetheart. No pressure.” He laughs as he talks, a picture of panic, “You’re sort of shy about that stuff, you know? I didn’t wanna surprise you.” 
“But you do want to kiss me?” you ask unsurely.
He puts his hand on your knee, the space between you suddenly smaller and warmer, the light like white glaze on his pupils, illuminating his finer details. He has a mole nestled under his eyelashes too small to see until now; it catches your attention. You stare at him too long. 
“Of course I do,” he says, eyebrows pinching together in concern. “I’ve wanted to kiss you since I met you.” 
You nod and snap your head back to your lap. Why does he have to be so nice? You wish you’d listened to Steve, even if he was joking, you shouldn’t have ever said yes to Eddie, because now you’re terrified you can’t kiss him and you’ll ruin everything…
“Hey, it’s fine. I’m not waiting for anything. You can take your time or you could never kiss me, and I won’t care. I swear. I mean, I really want you to kiss me but I’ll find a way to cope, I’m sure.” He takes his hand from your leg softly. “Do you want my jacket? It’s cold out, n’ we should probably start walking.” 
You pull your head up slowly. 
He reads your hesitant expression. “I’m in no rush,” he promises, head ever so slightly ducked to yours. 
Okay, you think. Okay, I can do this. You hold your breath and start to lean in. He falters, a millisecond of misunderstanding, before he recognises what you’re doing and smiles. He reaches for your waist with enough care to give you a chance to change your mind, and when you’re close enough to feel his breath, his lashes shutter. 
You follow suit, blind, with nothing but your intuition as you press your lips to his. 
With a feeling like the hum of the engine under your hands, you bring your fingers to his soft cheek and hold him still. He breathes in harshly, touches you far from it, his palm slipping behind your back to pull you in. You lean into it; it feels natural to give in, to turn your head one way and part your lips, to have him kiss back with heat and surprising sweetness.
You feel unlike yourself in a good way, falling back to kiss forward again, a third time, trying to chase the lulling bliss of his lips. The stomach aching want. Your hand chases across his cheek and into the curls behind his ear, needing him closer but not expecting the sound it elicits. He sighs into your lips and you flinch back, startled by the sensation. 
Eddie rubs your back with his index finger, unjudging as you drop your head to catch your breath. 
“You okay?” he asks quietly. You can hear his affection. It’s palpable. 
You nod, a dizzy weight collected in your forehead, thankful when his free hand catches your cheek and he turns your face gently to the side. “I got too hot,” you confess, only half of the truth. 
“It was pretty hot.” He smiles at you like you’re the only person in the world, like you’ve a secret only he knows. “Want me to turn on the A/C?” 
“No, I–” want to kiss you again, you think. You might even tell him so, but he starts to blow on your face, disrupting any thoughts you’d had earlier. He purses his lips and blows cold breath on your cheek, a tenderness in his gaze and the tip of his thumb where it rests just under your eye. “Oh.” 
This might be the most romantic thing anyone’s ever done for you. Your face feels precious in his careful hand, pretty under his longing look. You’re not scared when he encourages you back to his lips, your eyes quick to close, your hands across the gap of your seats to gather his shirt between tight fingers. 
His kiss is a reflection of him. Loser, rockstar, he’s eager and his hands start to betray that, his kissing melty hot and addictive as the tip of his nose presses hard to yours. You turn your face to accommodate him better and that small action drives him crazy. He’s pulling you in, smiling into your mouth, making breathy sounds that’ll stick around in your head ten times as long as the tingles filling your chest as just kisses and kisses and doesn’t stop. 
“M’sorry,” he says, pulling away, and then stealing another heavy, soft kiss like he couldn’t wait. “Sorry,” he apologises again, stroking the skin beside your eye to encourage you into opening them. “I’m not trying to get carried away. Just can’t believe you just kissed me.” 
“No, it’s okay, I– I really wanted to.” 
He kisses your cheek. You aren’t expecting it and you don’t know how to deal with it. It’s like kissing him has invigorated him, you’re a shot he knocked back, his excitement catching as he begs, “Close your eyes again, sweetheart, just one more–”
You raise your chin and he practically gasps, immediately pressing a last chaste kiss to your burning lips. 
“I’m not always like this,” he promises, leaning away, his fingertips falling from your face to trace down your neck, your shoulder. “You’re just so fucking pretty I lost my mind. I’m on best behaviour from now on, swears.” 
He raises his hand up in a scout’s honour. 
You breathe out happily. “Thank you.” 
“Oh my god. Quick, we better get out of this van before I lose my mind.” He shakes his head. “You’re insane. I have such a crush on you, holy fuck,” —he turns away from you and gets out of the van— “Jesus.” 
You pull down the sun visor to check your reflection in the mirror. You look thoroughly kissed, eyes aglow with it. 
“Fuck!” Eddie swears. You beam at yourself as he wraps on the window. “Come on, sweetheart! I have a concert to pretend to pay attention to.” 
You slink out of your seat, brave enough to try for another kiss so long as it doesn’t kill him dead right here in the parking lot. 
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
please like/reblog or comment if you enjoyed! I love knowing what you think and it means so much to me/ inspires me to write even more!!! <3 but of course I hope you enjoyed reading regardless :D 
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shuafiles · 2 months ago
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w boyfriend [j.ww]
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MDNI, 18+
SUMMARY | watching wonwoo play video games is so hot.
PAIRING | streamer gamer bf!wonwoo x afab!reader
CONTENT | smut with no plot (kinda), slight masturbation (f), oral (m receiving), unprotected sex (pls dont), light degradation, voyeurism? (listening in), big dick wonwoo
WORDS | 2.4k
A/N | typical wonwoo gamer smut, which im obsessed with. also valorant gamer wonwoo, and a lot of stream terms lol.
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you were lying in bed with your phone in hand, scrolling through every social media app due to boredom, when a notification popped up reading, “jwonwoo is live!”. a smile forming on your lips, you clicked on it. your boyfriend–clad in a grey hoodie and his black glasses–was displayed on your phone screen. he was looking around his screen, making sure everything was perfect for the stream. you glanced at the chat, seeing people slowly start to come in and greet him.
you loved that wonwoo was a streamer. it was so on brand of him to play video games and to livestream them to people. you could tell he loved creating content, too, always raving about what new games he was excited to play for his viewers. he couldn’t have done it without you. before you and wonwoo decided to live together, he used to stream his games for you on discord. seeing how entertaining it is to watch him play, you convinced him to livestream his gameplay to people, and he did. now he has over 300,000 followers on his account, supporting himself with what he loves doing most.
“plant the spike, gyu!” wonwoo’s voice echoed from your phone. you were so deep in thought that you hadn’t even realized his game started. examining him through his camera, his brows were furrowed, gaze intent on his game while simultaneously making call outs to his teammates.
there was something about wonwoo playing video games that made him so hot. his fingers quickly hovering and pressing different keys on his keyboard, which you could slightly see through the hand cam he had attached below his face cam (it was requested by his viewers). you loved the sight of him playing, you think it’s one of his hottest moments. him being so focused on whatever game he had on for the night. the sleeves of his hoodie being pushed up against his arm, his muscles flexing every now and then. you felt your arousal gathering between your legs, gripping your pillow before deciding to get up and head toward his room.
“hold on, cheol, i’m smoked off, can’t get into the site.” your boyfriend sat on his chair, facing his brightly lit monitor that you were sure was too close to his face. you leaned on the doorframe, arms crossed against your chest as you watched him. he muttered curse words when his agent died, leaning back on his chair as a spectator. the corner of his eye spotted you, head turning to face you fully, he flashed you a smile. he muted himself on discord, gesturing you to come close, which you did. “everyone, say hi to y/n! my lovely girlfriend is here.” he placed his hand on your hip as you leaned down to show yourself on camera.
“hi, chat!” you waved, smiling. your relationship with wonwoo was not hidden. his true fans knew he had a girlfriend, some were supportive, and some were haters. you did not really mind it, after all, they were only brave through the screen. you glanced at his second monitor where the chat was displayed, various people saying hi and complimenting you filled his stream. growing shy, you waved another goodbye before leaving the frame.
wonwoo quickly said he’d be right back before tapping the mic that was mounted on his desk to mute himself, pushing a button that turns his camera off. he slid one ear of his headphones off the side of his head. “hi, baby. what’s up?” he pulled you close to him, making you stand between his legs. his arms resting on your waist.
“nothing, just missed you.” you placed your arm on his shoulders, ruffling his hair lightly.
“wonwoo! buy a gun, man!” mingyu’s voice from his headphones. you leaned down to kiss his lips lightly before getting out of his grip.
“i’m sorry, baby. i’m just going to play a few games, then you have me, okay?” wonwoo assured you, placing his headphones on. taking a final look at you before he playfully patted your ass, making you yelp. “i love you!” he yelled out as you made your way out of his room.
an hour has passed, and you grew even more needy. wonwoo’s stream is still displayed on your phone, watching him intently and imagining him working on you instead of his keyboard. sprawled out on the bed, you closed your eyes, hands carefully caressing your own body. you wore a white tank top with lace on top and some pink and white striped lounge shorts. biting your lip, you slipped your hand under your shorts, not wearing any underwear. you swiped a finger from your entrance down to your clit, feeling your slick just from the thought of your boyfriend.
as if wonwoo could read your mind, you heard him groan from your phone. “fuck!” he sighed as he whiffed on an enemy. the sound traveling to your already throbbing core. you slipped a finger inside your pussy, not feeling content, you added another one. slowly pumping your fingers in and out of you, imagining his hands on you instead. groaning, it wasn’t enough; you needed more. pulling your fingers out from your shorts, and wiping them on the outside before marching over to wonwoo’s room.
wonwoo was practically in the same position you left him in. you walked near him but stopped when you were nearing his camera; you dropped to your knees, on all fours, and crawled under his desk. he was too focused on his game even to notice you were there. kneeling in front of him, you tapped his thigh with your hand, which made him jump and look down. you had a desperate look in your eyes, licking your lips. he smirked, he knew you like the back of his hand. he slid his chair closer to you before returning his gaze to his screen, your heart pounding from your chest as you pulled his boxers down enough to reveal his growing cock. he wasn’t that hard, which made you pout.
you grab hold of wonwoo’s cock, thumb sliding over the slit of his head while sliding your hand up and down. if he wasn’t hard before, he surely was now. his now perked-up cock was turning red from your touch. your mouth watered at his big cock pulsating. satisfied, you let go before grabbing the waistband of his boxers; he lightly lifted his lips as you pulled them down to his ankles.
“jesus.” you heard him grunt as you took his cock in your hand, darting your tongue out to his head. amused at his reaction, leaning down, you took your tongue out, licking the base of his cock all the way up to the head. he let out a groan, “i kicked the wall by accident.” he muttered against his mic, glancing at his chat to make sure no one could suspect what your naughty ass was up to. when he was in the clear, he glanced at you, pretending to reach for his foot, but he placed his hand on your cheek, caressing it softly. you leaned into his touch before you engulfed his cock in your mouth. tongue swirling around the base, moaning around his cock (thanking the heavens that he had noise cancellation on his mic). slowly pushing further down his length, lightly gagging when you felt the tip hit the back of your throat. you wrapped your fingers around the areas your mouth couldn’t reach. you continued to suck him off, hollowing your cheeks as you moved. tears brimming your eyes as you bobbed your head up and down.
wonwoo couldn’t focus on his game any longer, hearing his teammates curse at him for being shit, but he couldn’t care less, not when he had his hot girlfriend choking on his dick. so the minute his game ended (in which they lost) he clicked the “stream ending soon.” prompt displayed on his screen, and he muted his mic before gathering your hair with his hand, his other hand placing his headphones on his desk. his chat going crazy as to why he suddenly ended the stream.
“you’re such a naughty little slut, you know that?” wonwoo grunted, throwing his head back against his chair before guiding your head on his cock. you placed your hands flat against his thighs as he continued to thrust his cock in your mouth. his hips bucking upwards to bury his cock deeper into you. “needy princess couldn’t even wait for me to finish work, hm? you just want everyone to know what a dirty slut you are, don’t you, baby.” you looked at him through your lashes, he sighed at the sight of his cock deep in your mouth. “get up.” he let go of your hair, you unlatched yourself from his cock, a string of saliva forming.
wonwoo guided you onto his lap, your legs on either side of his thighs. his hand resting on your cheek before attaching his lips to yours. his lips were rough on yours as if he had been waiting to taste you all day. his tongue forcing its way into your mouth, making you moan. your hand flying to his hair, lightly gripping it.
“take these off.” pulling away from your lips, tugging at your shorts. you stood up before him, gripping your shorts before pulling them down. he leaned against his chair with his arms behind his head, shamelessly checking you out. “god, you’re so beautiful. take off your top for me, baby.” he gripped the hem of your shirt before pulling it off your body, he threw the shirt on his desk, hitting his mic, unknowingly causing it to unmute. he reached behind you to quickly press end stream, noticing his mic light was on. he glanced at his discord, seeing mingyu and seungcheol were still on the call. he decided to have fun. “come here, baby.” he gestured for you to climb on his lap, which you did immediately. making mingyu and seungcheol’s ears perk up on the other line.
“you’re wearing too much clothes.” you whined, gripping his hoodie, which he chuckled at, before reaching down and discarding the hoodie he had on.
“better?”
“god, yes.” you whimpered, fingers tracing his toned chest. you leaned forward, placing your lips on his neck, peppering him with soft kisses, and occasionally sucking on the spots you know he loves. you felt his hands rest on your ass, squeezing it, prompting you to grind your hips on his. your wetness transferring to his dick, a smirk forming on his face when he felt it.
“we barely even started, and you’re already dripping for me, princess.” wonwoo grabbed one of your breasts, placing his mouth near it. “what am i going to do with you?”
“please.” arching your back which made his mouth graze against your tits, you nearly cried at the contact. he hummed in amusement before swallowing your nipple with his mouth. you threw your head back, gripping his shoulders. he circled his tongue around the bud before pulling away and doing the same on your other boob. “wonwoo, please just fuck me already. been wanting you all night.” you begged.
“my poor girl, have you been waiting long?” he asked, to which you nodded. he lifted your hips before aligning his cock at your entrance, rubbing his tip along your folds, making you shiver. without warning, he gripped your body to sink down onto his cock, which made you yelp.
“oh god, your dick is so big!” you cried out, unaware that there were two people listening in on you.
mingyu groaned as he imagined you bouncing on his cock. it felt so wrong, but it was driving him insane. seungcheol, on the other hand, shamelessly already had his shorts down and his cock out, stroking it at every sound you made.
“fuck, how are you so tight every time?” wonwoo growled as you bounced on his cock. his hands lazily guided you, but you were too high on his cock that you were doing it all on your own. he watched as your boobs bounced along with your movement. the sound of skin slapping echoed throughout the room, beads of sweat forming on your forehead as you continued riding his cock. “look at you, you love fucking yourself on my cock, huh?” nodding at his words as you were too lightheaded to speak. your stomach forming knots as he talked you through it. you loved it when he talked dirty with you, his deep voice mumbling the words you wanted to hear driving you completely insane.
“love–” nails digging into his shoulder, “your cock inside me.” you gasped out. his grip on your hip tightened, holding you in place as he thrusts his hips instead. you cursed out his name as the tip of his cock kissed your cervix with every pound. your head falling on his shoulder, you planted sloppy kisses on his skin. he let out groans, breathing out as he felt your lips on him. “w-woo, i can’t.” closing your eyes, he quickened his pace.
“take my cock like the slut you are.” you clenched around him, as he repeatedly rammed into you. you pulled away from his neck and stared into his eyes. his eyes were dark, brows furrowed as he brought you over the edge.
“fuck, baby. i’m gonna cum.” you moaned as your hips met his.
“cum with me, princess.” with a few more thrusts, your orgasm came crashing down. your knees feeling weak as you felt wonwoo’s cum paint your walls white. your body gave up, curling up to his sweaty chest. trying to catch each other’s breaths.
“i love you.” mumbling against his chest.
“i love you, too, baby.” you felt wonwoo swivel his gaming chair around, speaking into his mic. “enjoyed the show, boys?” your eyes widened, pulling away from his chest. he grabbed the headphones to place them near your ears.
“jesus christ, didn’t know you guys were kinky as shit.” mingyu spoke out, your cheeks flushing.
“that was hot as fuck.” seungcheol admitted, his dick limp from jerking off. you slapped wonwoo’s chest, which he only laughed at. secretly finding it hot that they were listening in the entire time.
“keep it to your imagination. remember, she’s mine.” wonwoo sheepishly smiled at you before kissing you softly.
“w boyfriend.” you giggled against his lips.
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covid-safer-hotties · 3 months ago
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To My Unmasked Friend in the Fifth Year of COVID - By: Anna Holmes - Published Aug 17, 2024
I’m going to be honest with you, because I love you, and you deserve nothing but honesty. I’m going to try really hard not to be angry while I do it, but it’s probably going to slip out every now and again. But I need you to hear me out, all right?
By now, we’ve talked about my reality. My personal struggle with long COVID, the isolation I live in, why I am so angry all the time.
But let’s talk about you. You just went to a big convention overseas. You got on a plane, got a little gussied up, talked shop with some insiders, geeked out over awards and merch, ate, drank, were merry, left with your social cup and your heart full.
You’re a good person. We wouldn’t be friends otherwise! You’d never dream of tripping a person with a red and white cane, using the r-word, excluding a disabled person from an event because of something they can’t help.
You might even acknowledge that the COVID response from governments and organizations has been ableist and inadequate.
But you didn’t wear a mask.
For whatever reason — you wanted to show off your makeup, it makes you itchy, you believed the messaging that COVID is endemic (what does that actually mean?), you just don’t think about it anymore — you made a choice that actively excludes people like me from participating not only in an event like a convention, but society at large. And yes, it is a choice. Every time you step out into the world without a mask on your face, you have made a decision that your very good reason, whatever it is, supersedes the right of disabled and at-risk people to exist safely in your orbit.
Well, hold on, you say. It’s not any one individual’s fault, it’s the inadequate public health messaging. Isn’t that what you’ve been saying?
And I have. In the past, I have talked about how it is unconscionable that health authorities have thrown their hands up and rescinded guidance that would have saved hundreds of thousands of lives and prolonged a pandemic that, to hear them tell it, has been bested. It hasn’t. Worst of all, the financial motivation that we all know is driving this premature victory lap isn’t even being fulfilled. Long COVID and other post-COVID complications are costing the global economy one trillion a year. Meanwhile, article after article handwrings about nobody wanting to work anymore, about the sagging college application scene, about declines in military enlistment, and the strain on our healthcare systems.
All of this is very much the fault of our leaders, who have decided the political ramifications of “normalcy” are more important than the health and lives of the 400 million people living with long COVID across the globe, the immunocompromised folks who are increasingly being shut out of every conceivable public space, and the disabled community which has been screaming into the wind about our marginalization since before the virus even hit US soil.
But I want to be very clear. You are helping them do this.
The reality is that we have been living in this deeply flawed landscape of “personal choice”, and you’ve made yours. You’ve opted not to look into how densely clustered cases are. You’ve stopped listening to your friends who have informed themselves. You’ve given yourself permission to put COVID on the back burner. You’ve earned it, right? Four and a half years of trauma?
COVID doesn’t care if you’re tired of being scared or careful or considerate. COVID is not something you can personally overcome by being smart or virtuous or brave. It is a virus which only seeks to infect and replicate, and it is getting very good at those things. While you’ve looked away, my community has been scrambling to avoid variants that skirt immunity and don’t show up on rapid tests until day five-seven. The constant battle has changed since you were last in it. It’s not sufficient anymore to get your shots and test before a big event. You could well be asymptomatic and infectious, or have symptoms and convinced yourself it can’t be COVID because that second line hasn’t popped up.
You have come to the conclusion sometime between 2022 and now that you just have to decide what level of risk you’re comfortable with and live with it. The problem with that is scale. It’s you and everybody else doing that, and a lot of people have decided they are comfortable with a high level of risk. Despite what you’ve been told, you’re not just making that decision for yourself. You are making it for every person you come in contact with.
Think back to the early tense days of 2020. We were told to select a “bubble.” Those people would be our social lifelines, and through those, we could control our exposure.
My bubble is quite small. It includes my husband, my sister, and two friends I see relatively frequently.
My husband goes to work via the bus, and to the grocery store. Every person he comes in contact with there has the potential to infect him, and then he has the potential to pass it along to me. He mitigates this by wearing a well-fitted respirator at all times.
My sister goes to work at a busy public place. She masks when public facing and takes it off in the back office. She goes to restaurants, bars, concerts, hangs out with friends and her own partner unmasked. About 75% of her interactions have the heightened potential to infect her, which she might then bring into my house when she visits me.
My friends do not mask anywhere except my house when asked. They attend concerts, shows, cons, bars.
Obviously, I am in control of whether I wear a mask around these people. And as we approach one million new cases a day, I will be around everyone but my husband. But science is clear: reciprocal masking is more effective at infection control than a single person masking — especially when that single person is trying to protect themselves, not others.
This is settled science. We’ve known this since 2020. It says clearly that the choice you make is not personal- it has implications for everyone you come in contact with.
And being clear — if I could, I’d make everyone wear a mask for their own health. I don’t want people suffering with what I have. But you’ve been told this lie that you can take your risks for yourself, so you feel comfortable going out without a mask. You’ve been told this lie that it’s possible to completely recover from a COVID infection, so you assume that even if you do catch it, that’s what’ll happen to you, despite evidence showing that every body is indelibly changed by an infection, and that risk only grows with each subsequent infection.
And the greatest lie of all — that only the sick or elderly have anything to fear from COVID — has given you unfounded confidence in your own “good” genes or immune system or fitness. You can get long COVID even if you’re in peak form — in fact, may even be more likely to be hit hard.
So you have decided, individually and collectively, that only the sick or elderly should have to take precautions, and you freewheel through life, only to get surprised and dismayed when you bump into COVID in the wild. It’s back, people declare every summer or winter, as though it ever left.
But I want you to really think about the implications of your choice. Besides yourself. Because let’s be honest here, that’s who you’ve been thinking about, right? Your risk. Your comfort. Never mind your bubble, never mind the bubble of everyone you come into contact with, never mind the people like me who are literally hiding from people like you.
You’re not masking at the doctor’s office. You’re not masking at the airport. You’re not masking at the giant superspreader you just attended, and you’re not masking in the bars and restaurants where we know the virus flourishes. And then you’re bringing that exposure back to your family and friends. Back to the grocery store, where you run across people like my husband, shopping for someone who is unsafe to leave the house, or your elderly neighbors, or an immunocompromised employee.
You’re a good person, or you like to think of yourself that way. That’s why when you’re asked to mask, you dismiss it out of hand — because that changed behavior implies that you’ve been doing something wrong.
And my friend, I’m telling this because I love you: you have been. You might have been doing that on faulty information, but be honest with yourself and with me — you’ve heard me begging people to take this seriously. You’ve seen the information I’ve been sharing. You have had the opportunity to seek out the correct information all along, and you have chosen not to.
It isn’t too late to change your view of the risk you’re imposing on the people around you. It’s not too late to push public health to become more effective. It’s not too late to act in solidarity and be the inclusive person you think you are. It’s not too late to take care of yourself.
Ultimately, that’s what I have been screaming myself hoarse about. I don’t want you to end up with what I have. I don’t want you to inadvertently impose that on someone else. And yes, I’ve been angry, because you’ve been advertising your absolute lack of concern with group shots of your naked faces on social media. It doesn’t seem to bother you that I am stuck at home like it’s 2020, except for doctors’ appointments that I literally have to risk my life to go to. You’ve told yourself that it’s not your problem, because only the sick and elderly have to take precautions.
You know better. You can do better. For your community, yourself, and me, do better.
Please. I love you.
Anna
PS. If you’re feeling upset and embarrassed right now, the best thing you can do is take action. Get yourself good masks (the surgicals and cloth ones don’t cut it anymore), donate to mask blocs so others can access good masks, write to your representatives and the President, comment on upcoming CDC guidance, schedule yourself a booster, and talk to your loved ones about doing better, too. The only way we get out of this is with community care. So care.
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moonstruckme · 7 months ago
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can i request a reader who can’t admit she’s upset with one the marauders (or all)? like refuses to cry…only if you’re comfortable of course. thank you :)
Thank you for requesting gorgeous!
modern au
Sirius Black x fem!reader ♡ 1.3k words
The smell of smoke coming from the kitchen is the first sign that Sirius has tipped over from resentment into remorse. 
“Jesus,” you open the front door on your way into the kitchen, eyes watering, “what are you doing?” 
“I was trying to make rice,” he says, fanning desperately over your pressure cooker, “but I think I’ve fucked it.” 
“Do you think so?” Any other day you’d both grin at the harmless snark, but now Sirius’ expression pinches and you think your own must look the same, your tone more biting than you meant for it to be. “It’s fine, it’ll be fine once it airs out. Help me with the windows?” 
Sirius acts like it’s a competition, opening three windows before you’ve finished two and looking at you like he’s expecting a pat on the head for it. You try to give him a smile, and his expression clouds over. 
“Sorry,” he says, voice not quite cool but oddly remote, “the idea was to surprise you with dinner, and I’ve broken your rice thingy instead.” 
“It’s not broken,” you reassure him. “I’m sure it’ll be fine once I clean it out. Why were you trying to make dinner?” 
Sirius grimaces. It’s a full body motion, his eyebrows hooking in the middle while the muscles in his forearms shift uncomfortably and his shoulders migrate upward. “Sort of a shitty attempt at an olive branch, I guess.” 
Some of the smoke has cleared, and you brave the kitchen. “I don’t need an olive branch,” you say. “If you say we’re good, we’re good.” 
“Don’t do that.” He follows you into the kitchen. “I can tell you’re upset, just because—” Sirius hisses when you take the bowl out of the pressure cooker, transferring it swiftly to the sink “—fuck, baby, don’t burn yourself. Let me take care of that later.” 
“I’d rather handle it now,” you say, turning on the faucet. “I’m just letting it soak anyway.” 
“I’m trying to handle this.” Sturdy hands wrap around your shoulders, turning you to face your boyfriend. He looks at you steadily. “Don’t pretend you’re not angry with me, because I know that you are.” 
A spark of annoyance tingles up your spine as you shrug, reaching behind you to turn off the faucet. “I’m not.” 
“Can you stop trying to make me feel like an idiot? I know you. You’ve been all stiff since last night.” 
“You were angry last night. Not me.” 
“Yeah, well it seems to have caught on.” 
You turn away from him and back towards the sink, swishing your hand in the cold water of the bowl to dislodge the charred rice sticking to the bottom. You don’t know where Sirius gets off, acting like you’re holding a grudge when he’s the one who shouted at you last night. Your phone had died while you were out with friends. That was all that had happened. You didn’t think anything of it, because Sirius, the only person who would really worry about not being able to reach you, knew you were out and that you’d be home late. 
But when you had gotten home, he’d been furious. Gone on and on about how he’d been trying to get a response from you all night, and how dangerous it was to get drunk when you couldn’t call anyone (nevermind that you’d been with your friends), and how freaked out he’d been. He wouldn’t listen to you. He’d only wanted to yell and rage, and make you sit in your heels on the couch while he did it. He’d even seemed like he might be tearing up a couple of times. And you hated to think of him being scared for you, but since when was it your responsibility to answer every time he called? He knew you were with your friends. You hadn’t asked him to check in on you. 
He’d gone to bed still fuming and you’d stayed on the couch rather than try to sleep in a hostile bed. Now, inexplicably, his tune seems to have changed. 
“So,” Sirius sighs, “this is you not mad, huh?” 
“Yup.” You scrub at the bowl with your fingernails. 
“I just want a chance to apologize.” 
“You can if it’ll make you feel better, but I don’t need it.” 
“Why can’t you just admit it?” 
“Because I’m not the one who gets pissy about stupid things.” You dislodge a chunk of rice and your hand slips across the bowl, splashing water onto your shirt. “That’s you.” 
There’s a second of dense, oppressive silence. When Sirius breaches it, you can hear the smirk in his voice. “There’s my girl. Tell me about the stupid things I got pissy about, would you?”
“It’s nothing.” 
“No, it’s not. It wasn’t nothing to me, and clearly it wasn’t to you either. Go on, doll.” 
“I don’t want to argue with you.” 
“Sure you do.” 
“Why do you want to fight so bad?” 
“Because,” Sirius says, and you can hear him moving behind you, can all but see him leaning against the counter, the picture of insouciance, “I think you need to get it out of your system.” 
You scrub harder at the bowl. Blackened bits of rice float to the top of the water. “Like you do?” 
A pause. His voice softens. “It’s not always a good thing. I shouldn’t have shouted at you, last night.” Something in your chest tightens painfully at this new gentle tone. “I’m sorry. I let my temper get the better of me. I was just worried about you.” 
“I don’t think that’s my fault,” you say, managing to sound mostly normal. You dump out the contents of the bowl, filling it again with warmer water. “My phone was dead, and I was with my friends. I didn’t need you to worry about me.” 
“I just do, when I know you’ve all been drinking, and I can’t talk to you to know you’re okay…” Sirius takes in a breath, breaking your heart with how it sounds like he’s trying to steady himself. “But you’re right, okay? It wasn’t fair.” 
“I didn’t know I was coming home to be shouted at.” This time, your voice betrays you, a pitchiness that makes you go quiet fast. You hear Sirius move. 
“Sweetheart?” he asks softly. There’s a touch at your elbow. “I’m sorry, baby, please look at me.” 
You don’t want to, but you don’t want your embarrassment interpreted as ire. You take a quiet breath before pivoting from the sink. Sirius’ eyes are waiting, sad and fretful as they probe at yours. 
“I’m sorry,” he says again, impossibly quieter, and runs his fingers from your elbow up the back of your arm. “It wasn’t your fault, I wasn’t being fair. I shouldn’t have shouted at you.” 
You press your lips together, hard. His eyebrows hook up in the middle. 
“You can cry, sweet thing. It’s okay.” You shake your head mutely, blinking, and Sirius makes a terribly lovely cooing sound, snaking an arm around your shoulders and pulling you into his chest. You hug him back as the first hot tear rolls down your cheek. “Oh, sweetheart. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.” Your shoulders jump with a stilted, poorly repressed sob, his grip on you tightening. “It’s okay, I’ve got you. I’ve got you, baby. My temper tantrum really did a number on you, huh?” 
You laugh wetly. “Guess so,” you squeak. “Sorry.” 
“If you apologize for this, I may shout at you again,” he warns fondly. “You haven’t done anything wrong, lovely girl. Just let it out, if you need to.” 
You know that’s not easy for Sirius to say. Know he’s likely close to tears himself, from how agitated seeing other people cry makes him. You appreciate the offer. 
You fall into a silence less heavy than any that’s suffocated your home since last night, broken up only by the steady, quiet thumping of Sirius patting your back and the intermittent smooching sounds as he kisses your shoulder or your cheek or the side of your neck. You stand still in your smoky kitchen, wetting your boyfriend’s shoulder with tears and snot, and he lets you.
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dumplingsjinson · 9 months ago
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List of “you just had to go and ruin something good, didn’t you?” prompts
“…Maybe you should have kept that to yourself.”
“I really wish I didn’t find out about what you did.”
“You should have trusted me.” “How dare you— You can’t be serious right now. You made it so fucking difficult for me to trust you.” 
“Things could have stayed the same if you didn’t go and run your mouth.”
“There are days when I wish you didn’t tell me how you felt.” 
“You’ve done nothing but fuck things up, so thanks a lot for that.” 
“So… What was I supposed to do? Hide how I felt and just carried on like my feelings meant nothing? Like my emotions hold no weight at all?” 
“This could have been avoided if you didn’t—” “If I didn’t what? If I didn’t tell you how I felt about you?” 
“Why are you letting my feelings get in the way of our friendship? I’m not asking you to like me back! I’m not asking for any of that so why… Why? I just don’t understand what I’ve done that was so fucking wrong that I’m being literally condemned for it by you.” 
“So you’re saying I wouldn’t have lost you all if I had just sat there and bit my tongue.” 
“I’m sorry for telling the truth. I’m sorry I didn’t want to lie.” 
“If telling a lie was the only way I could keep us together than I think I’d prefer things this way. I don’t want us to be built on lies. It’s happened before, and it fell apart right in front of me and… I don’t want to risk going through that pain again. Especially knowing I could have done something to save it from crumbling like that, but I was not brave enough to make that step.”
“Curiousity more than just screwed us over, didn’t it?”
“We wouldn’t be here if you were capable of telling even an ounce of truth.”
“It’s the fact that we lost something so dear to us because of one small detail that really didn’t need to be aired out like that.” 
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Join my Discord server: Steaming Dumplings Nation (so you can also join in on yelling at me to go to sleep at an appropriate time)
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carolperkinsexgirlfriend · 6 days ago
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can you see the stars in your dreams (and do they have a lot to say about me) - Part 17
Or: a secret Admirer AU
PART 1 || PART 2 || PART 3 || PART 4 || PART 5 || PART 6 || PART 7 || PART 8 || PART 9 || PART 10 || PART 11 || PART 1 || PART 13 || PART 14 || PART 15 || PART 16
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Eddie’s back to school on Tuesday, black eye turning a mottled sort of green, lip scabbed over. From where he’s hemmed in by Robin and Chrissy, Steve watches Eddie catch a glimpse of him and bolt the other way.
Jeff sighs, lets go of his hold on Chrissy’s arm, and says, “sorry, Steve. I’m just gonna—” and then he points toward Eddie and follows after him without another word.
Steve’s gut clenches with guilt. He’d put that look on Eddie’s face, had caused the rift in his and Jeff’s friendship, had split the forming group up with his ridiculous crush. But Chrissy and Robin are still here, standing by his side.
“Are he and Jeff okay?” Steve asks, biting his lip as he glances at Chrissy.
“I think so,” she says, looking after her boyfriend. “They talked on the phone, but Jeff didn’t tell me what about.”
“Forget about them,” Robin replies, reaching out to take his hand even as it makes everyone around them stare. “Come on, Stevie, or we’ll be late to Ms. Clickity Clack’s class.”
Steve passes the rest of the day in a daze, the spot at his side a revolving cast of Chrissy, Robin, and Jeff, like they’d all talked behind his back and decided he couldn’t be trusted with being alone right now. Steve can’t blame them because as soon as he’s left unattended in his big empty house, he gets out his notebook and pen, and begins to write.
   Eddie —
   I’m sorry I never got to read your last letter, but it wasn’t for me anyways. Maybe none of them were, not really. And I’m sorry about that, even sorrier about how your pretty face got caught in the ceasefire. I’m just full of sorries I’m to scared to tell to your face—from the way you ran when you saw me in the hallway this morning, maybe you wouldn’t want me to anyway.
   You’ve always been the brave one, so you must really want to not see me, huh? I hope you and Jeff are friends again. I’m sorry about that too, I’m the one who asked him not to tell you. I was afraid, but that’s no excuse.
   I don’t know how to stop wanting to right write to you. I can’t turn off the part of me that still wants to know everything about you. There’s a whole in my heart, and I keep trying to find people to fill it, but I can never be in love with someone who loves me back. You know?
   I’m sorry, Eddie. Maybe someday, I’ll get to say it to your face.
   Sorry,
   Steve
He closes the notebook on the damning words and shoves it into his nightstand so he doesn’t have to look at it. Sleep doesn’t come—the house is too quiet. He grabs the phone off his dresser and calls the only other person he knows whose parents trust them enough to have a phone in their bedroom.
“H’lo?” Robin mutters sleepily after finally picking up the phone six rings later.
She sounds tired—Steve’s sorry he woke her. “I wrote another letter,” he says.
That seems to perk her up instantly, as she hisses down the line, “Steven James Harrington.”
“Not my name, Robin Steven Bobbington,” he replies, talking right over her shrieked “well, that’s not mine!” to continue, “I’m not going to send it.”
“You better not,” she replies, and Steve can hear some rustling on her end, like she’s settling back down into her bed. He wishes, suddenly, that he was in there with her, clutching her hand as they fall asleep side by side. Instead, he lays down on his own bed and concentrates on the noises coming down the line.
“Is it stupid that I miss him?” he asks.
“Yeah, kinda.”
“Robin!”
She laughs, a quiet sleepy chuckle that warms him straight through. “I’m just saying! He’s been treating you like shit, Stevie.”
Steve sighs, burrowing down under his comforter and taking the phone with him. “He was different in the letters,” he whispers, like someone in his empty house might hear him otherwise. “Sweeter, you know?”
Robin sighs, “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, me too.”
There’s enough sorries to go around for all of them, apparently. They’re quiet for a while, Robin’s breathing keeping him company in his big, lonely bed with his big, lonely thoughts.
“I love you, Robbie,” he whispers. “You know that, right?”
He’s been saying it a lot lately, throwing the words around like they’ll connect this time and get him something real. And they had, with Chrissy, with Robin, hell, even with Jeff. Just, not with Eddie. Maybe someday, he’ll learn to be okay with that.
“Love you, too, Dingus,” Robin replies, like it’s easy.
He falls asleep that night to the sound of Robin’s quiet snoring.
***
Eddie thinks about it—obsessively, compulsively. He dreams about it, jerks off about it, fucking cries about it. He reads the letters, again, and again, and again, wishing desperately that he still had that first one. At school, he checks his locker obsessively, compulsively, hoping there’s another note in his locker—there never is.
“Dude, what’s your problem?” Gareth asks, an elbow into Eddie’s side.
“Ow, ribs!” Eddie cries, curling away from him and into Doug at their usual lunch table.
“Sorry!” Gareth replies, leaning away from him and raising his hands up like that’ll somehow prove he’s harmless.
Jeff snorts around his sandwich, “gotta be careful, Gare-bear. He’s precious cargo now.”
“Oh fuck off,” Eddie replies, rolling his eyes as the rest of Hellfire laugh around him.
“No, but seriously, dude,” Gareth asks, this time without the thrown elbow. “What’s up with you?”
Eddie looks across the cafeteria at Steve and Chrissy’s usual spots, still empty the way they have been for weeks. He worries, sometimes, that they’re not eating, and it’s his fault.
Hopefully, they’re just packing lunches from home and eating somewhere else (he’s been too afraid to check).
“Can’t tell you buddy,” Eddie replies, still looking at the empty spot like that’ll somehow make the duo appear. “I promised.”
Gareth, clearly having followed his line of sight, leans closer and asks in an unsubtle whisper, “but it’s about you know what?”
Doug sits on, oblivious, but Jeff snorts again and asks, “okay, you didn’t tell me jack shit, but you told the freshman?”
“Sophomore, jackass!” Gareth cries, before seeming to realize the implications of Jeff’s sentence. “You told Jeff?”
“I knew before you did,” Jeff says smugly, and Eddie’s starting to get pissed off about that again.
“How!”
“Jeff, dearest?” Eddie grits out. “Do you want me to punch you in the face?”
That shuts the table up catastrophically. But in the end, Jeff sighs and says, “I’m coming over after school,” and the rest of lunch is spent fielding Gareth’s indignant questions.
True to his word, Jeff climbs into Eddie’s passenger seat at the end of the day. Eddie doesn’t take them to the trailer, he just drives around, taking back roads round and round, restlessness making his fingers twitch in the gear shift.
Jeff’s the one who breaks the silence, in the end. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” he says, making Eddie flinch at the sudden noise. “Steve just seemed so scared, and Chrissy was crying so—”
“He was scared?” Eddie interrupts, stuck on the thought. He’d known that, before, but now that Eddie’s afraid, too, it hits like a punch to the chest.
“Of course he was,” Eddie replies to his own question. Suddenly unable to focus, Eddie pulls over to the side of the road. “I’m scared, too.”
Jeff sucks in a breath; Eddie doesn’t look away from his own knees.
“Yeah?”
Eddie bites his lip, knowing that Jeff will be able to read between the lines. “Yeah.” His eyes are watering, and Eddie swipes at them, embarrassed. “And I know we’re supposed to be talking about us, but I just—”
“No, hey,” Jeff replies. Eddie hears the sound of his seatbelt unbuckling, and the rustle of him shifting in his seat, and suddenly, Jeff’s hand is clasping Eddie’s shoulder, shaking him around just a little. “You’re my best friend—we’re fine, dude.”
Eddie swipes at his eyes again, “I think I want to ask him out, but what if I’m wrong?” Eddie asks, tracking Jeff’s expression out of the corner of his eye. “I don’t want to hurt him again.”
“So, what?” Jeff asks, voice deadpan. “You find out he likes you and suddenly he’s not just a jock anymore?”
Eddie looks down at his own knees, bracing for a hit he knows will never come. But, Eddie’s always been good at hurting himself, so he thinks about that yellow nail polish again, the enraptured look in Steve’s eyes during every D&D session, the way he’d glued himself to Robin Buckley, band nerd supreme’s side in recent weeks. The way he’d look at Eddie like he wasn’t the king of the freaks, like he was worth something.
“He was never just a jock,” Eddie murmurs. “I just never let myself think about it.”
Jeff mmmhmms him and Eddie knows him well enough to hear the doubt beneath the agreement.
“I was afraid, okay?” Eddie laments, scrunching his eyes closed tight until that makes his bruised eye ache too much. “You wouldn’t get it.”
At that, Jeff scoffs, and before Eddie can start up another tirade, he replies, “right, the black guy dating a white girl in Po-dunk, Indiana has no idea how scary it can be to make a move on the person you like.”
Okay, fair.
“You know what could happen if the wrong person finds out?” Jeff continues. “I’ll be lucky if they let me get out of town alive.”
“Okay, okay! I get it, sorry!” Eddie cries, throwing his hands up in defeat. And Jeff, being the asshole he is, just laughs at his discomfort. “How’s that going anyway?”
“With Chrissy?” Jeff asks, continuing when Eddie nods. “She’s great, man. I really, really like her.”
He’s smiling all goofy and in love. Eddie waits for the jealousy to hit; it never comes. Even as he’d flirted with her, there’d always been a disconnect for him between the letters and the girl. He knows why, now.
“I’m happy for you.”
Jeff aims that same goofy smile at him and punches his shoulder. “Thanks, man.”
Eddie wants to feel that way about someone. He wants to think of them and smile like he just can’t help himself. And with Steve Harrington of all people, maybe he can.
“If I ask Steve out, do you think he’ll still say yes?”
“Oh, for sure,” Jeff replies without hesitation before he turns to Eddie and eyes him up and down. “But are you sure you want to?”
Eddie bites back the defensive retort rising on his tongue, and grits out, “what do you mean?”
Jeff sighs and leans back in his chair. Eddie waits, three seconds from snapping as he stews in Jeff’s silence, hands clenched so hard against the steering wheel that it feels like one of his nails might pop clean off. 
“Jeff–”
“No one’s ever liked you before!” Jeff cries, and it hits Eddie like a punch to the sternum. “And maybe it’s not fair of me to ask but, are you sure you even really like him?”
“What?” Eddie asks, his mind a record skipping against a bent needle. “What do you–”
“Eddie, man,” Jeff sighs, swiveling his head to finally look Eddie directly in the eyes. “Do you like Steve Harrington, or do you just like that he likes you?”
He drops the wheel, hands almost numb as he shakes them out, no longer able to meet Jeff’s eye. 
How would anyone ever know that for sure? How can he know the origin of a feeling when it’s been there, simmering in the background of his brain, just waiting for him to wake up? How can he separate the feeling for a person and the person’s feeling for them?
That’s like asking him to unbraid his hair, let it fall back together, and still be able to tell which strands made up each component of the braid–it can’t be done.
But, “Gareth said I was obsessed with him,” Eddie replies, barely above a whisper. “Like, before I knew he wrote the letters?”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” Eddie laughs, but it’s just like Steve said–it sounds different when he doesn’t think it’s funny. “And, he was right, you know? I was flirting with Chrissy, but I couldn’t stop thinking about him.”
Eddie runs a shaking hand through his hair and buries his face into his hands with a shudder. “He’s just–he’s Steve Harrington, right? Everyone knows everything about him, but then he just changes the script!” Eddie’s smiling now, manic, animated. “And I wanted to know everything.”
Eddie drops his hands to look over at Jeff, meeting his eyes once more. Jeff looks patient, ready, hopeful in a way he hadn’t before, so Eddie keeps talking.
“Like, Chrissy was flirting with you and he didn’t even seem to care, and the yellow nail polish, and he came to Hellfire, Jeff. Steve Harrington came and watched us play Dungeons and Dragons.”
“I know,” Jeff replies, grinning now, pearly whites all on full display. 
“And when he came to band practice, he was just like, watching me, and I sort of wanted to die, but in a good way, you know?”
Jeff decidedly does not look like he knows, but he’s still grinning across at Eddie like he’s proud of him. Eddie’s kind of proud, too, that he’s managing to say all of this aloud. It feels somehow new and a long time coming at the same time. 
“Okay, you can ask him out,” Jeff says, turning forward in his seat and buckling his seatbelt once more. 
Eddie laughs. “Oh, because I needed your blessing?”
“Yeah,” Jeff replies, grinning as he turns back to Eddie, looking him up and down like he’s a slab of meat Jeff’s checking for its quality. “Maybe wait until you’re healed up, though. You look like one of those cardboard box kittens that I keep seeing on the news.”
“Shut up!” Eddie squawks, but he’s smiling, helplessly, hopefully.
Eddie Munson with a chance at love, who would’ve thought?
PART 18
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lovebugism · 1 year ago
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hey honey can i request a shy!reader x grumpy!eddie , maybe they’re pumpkin picking with friends & something angsty ensues but then fluffy & after they all go eat at the diner and get spooky themed orders 🤭
thanks for requesting lovie! — eddie gets grumpy on a fall outing with the gang (shy!reader, established relationship, hurt/comfort, 1.3k)
fictober (㇏(•̀ᵥᵥ•́)ノ)
Eddie’s a big ol’ grump at Eugene’s Pumpkin Patch, but he’s being really brave about it. He follows you like a puppy, visibly unamused about the whole thing but trying hard to be a good boyfriend despite his woe.
“Ah! Look at this one!” you gasp at the sight of a pumpkin, in a sea of bright orange pumpkins. 
Swallowed whole by your sweater, you crouch in the tall grass and reach for the tiny round thing hidden in it. The runt pumpkin sits neatly in your palms. “It’s so wittle,” you singsong up at Eddie in a tiny, high-pitched voice.
He smiles despite himself, laughing even though he’s grumpy, ‘cause you’re the cutest thing he’s ever seen.
“I’m gonna get this one,” you announce affirmatively when you rise to full height again.
“You made me drive an hour out just to get the tiniest pumpkin they have?” Eddie asks, laughing still but with a subtle bite of annoyance.
You try to ignore it, though the weight of his aggravation makes you writhe. “But it’s cute…” you defend with a weak shrug. “And also, you have to get one, remember?”
You take a tentative step towards Eddie, standing chest to chest. He huffs and puts his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket. His chocolate eyes flit around the expansive farm, dull and unimpressed. “They all look the same, so… I don’t think it really matters.”
“It does matter!” you insist, girlish and quiet and stubborn. “You have to pick the one you like the most— that’s the whole point!”
“You’re telling me there’s an art to pumpkin picking?” the boy teases with a crooked grin, tilting his head to the side so his curls bunch at his shoulder.
Still clutching the tiniest pumpkin either of you have ever seen, you nod. “Yes. That’s exactly what I’m telling you.”
He scoffs again in a curt laugh. He looks around again, only to point to the one sitting by his feet.
“Alright… How about that one?”
“Eddie!”
“What?” he whines in the same pouty tone as you.
“Can you at least pretend you’re having fun?” you murmur, a bit sad you have to even ask. 
You always spiral when he gets weird, secretly terrified that it’s all your fault. He doesn’t talk, so you overthink. Your brain gets mean, and you need Eddie to make you feel better — but he can’t because he’s weird. It’s unbearable. For both of you.
“It’s cold and rainy and Steve’s pants gave me a headache on the way over and I don’t feel good, okay? I’m sorry,” Eddie rambles with a pout, looking visibly pained about all of it.
Any excitement you had left leaves you like an ebbing tide. “Okay,” you mutter with a soft nod.
“I’m gonna go smoke,” the boy announces. 
He smacks a fleeting kiss to your cheek before he goes but doesn’t bother to invite you to come with him. He doesn’t feel very deserving of your company right now, too selfish in his woe and painfully self-aware about it.
You stand in place while he walks back to the van, feeling utterly alone and unwanted.
“Where’d Eddie go?” Steve wonders when he walks up to you with Robin at his side. 
They carry two pumpkins each, struggling with each of them because they’ve somehow managed to find the biggest ones on the whole farm. You figure they made a bet about it because everything’s a competition with them.
“Um… to smoke, I think,” you answer shyly, embarrassed to have been found alone for a reason you can’t name. “He just kinda… left.”
Robin scoffs. “I think he’s on his period,” she jokes with a gritty laugh.
“Yeah. He said my pants looked stupid before we left. I knew something was up.”
The brunette girl side-eyes the boy beside her. “I think he might’ve been right about that one, Stevie.”
You make a quiet exit when they begin to bicker back and forth. You duck through the bustling pumpkin patch and try not to trip in the tall grass on your way to Eddie’s van. 
Your boots crunch over the gravel of the parking lot. You find him leaning against the trunk, blowing out smoke from his pink mouth, slouching like he’s weighed down by his own sadness. 
“You okay, Eds?” you ask to announce your arrival. 
His eyes widen when he realizes you’re there. He’d pretend to be fine if it didn’t take all the energy he had left. “No,” he answers honestly, then quickly corrects, “I mean— I am, but… I feel bad. I was acting like a dick…”
“Yeah,” you concur with a nod. “You were.”
He’s too shocked to hide it on his face. You’re never normally so confrontational. You’re usually too quiet for that, too soft. And you still are now, because you always are, but he feels like he deserves to see this sterner side of you.
“But it’s okay. I know you didn’t wanna come in the first place.”
He turns on his shoulder when you stand at his side, towering over you as he flicks the butt of his cigarette. “Yeah, but… I didn’t have to be such an asshole to you about it. I feel like I fuckin’ ruined this whole day, you know?”
“We all have our moments, Eds. It’s no big deal,” you assure with a weak shrug and a stronger smile. “We still have the whole afternoon left— you didn’t ruin anything. Doesn’t make me love you any less, either.”
Your words make him grin. Like, really grin — all wide and rosy and boyish. You make him smile like nothing’s ever hurt him. Like nothing’s ever been wrong in his life. Fuck, he’ll never get tired of hearing you say that.
“I love the shit outta you, you know that?” he mumbles but doesn’t give you a chance to answer. He tosses the cigarette to the ground and snuffs it out with his sneaker right before kissing you absolutely stupid.
He wraps his arms around your neck, smothering your face with his. No one’s ever been kissed as hard as he’s kissing you now. The realization makes you smile too wide to kiss him back.
He pulls away from you with a hearty smack. With pinker lips and chocolate eyes, he grins hopefully down at you. “So you’re not mad at me?” he wonders, gentle like a child.
“Yes,” you nod, playfully firm. “I’m very mad, actually.”
Eddie’s smile widens. He knows you’re joking and decides to lean into it. “What can I do then, huh?” he murmurs lowly to you, a knowing smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “How can I make it up to you?”
He wants to kiss you again. He wants to get you in the back of his van in a vacant parking lot. He wants you to tell him to make you feel good and not to stop until you’re pushing him away.
You know all of this, ‘cause you can practically read his mind, so you decide to drive him crazier. “I want you…” you start in the same low tone, bordering on sultry. 
Eddie’s already nodding. 
You smile and continue. 
“…To go pick your most favorite pumpkin in the whole patch, and then take me to Benny’s Burgers.”
Feeling slightly disappointed and utterly teased, Eddie searches the entire patch and finds the weirdest-shaped, wartiest pumpkin the earth has ever grown. He drives the gang to the diner after and sits you in his lap when all of you squeeze into one booth. 
He shares his milkshake with you and lets you have the pickle slice that comes with his burger when you ask for it (‘cause everyone knows it’s the best part). It’s the purest form of love, if he has anything to say about it.
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just-a-ghost00 · 5 months ago
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What they think when they see you vs what they show (possibly 18+)
You can pick your group thinking about a crush, a lover or anyone you are curious about. But this has to be someone you know currently. It can't be a future person.
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Group 1
Their thoughts - 2 of cups, 7 of cups, 8 of cups, Strength, page of cups, knight of cups , back of the deck is The Sun
"I can’t let them know I like them. I can’t show them how I feel for them. I have to act strong. I can’t be vulnerable. My god, I wanna ask them out so bad. Would they even care? They would reject my offer, I’m pretty sure. They must like stronger individuals. Surely I’m not their type. I should better leave. But I can’t. I feel so drawn to them. Hell, what should I do?! Should I stay or should I go? God they’re so beautiful. But I can’t tell them, now can I? I hope they don’t notice I’m staring. Omg they’re looking. Act normal, act normal!"
For some of you this person may be in a connection with someone else already and they are trying to reason themselves and repress their feelings. For others, this person thinks you’re destined to be together but for some reason they are afraid to confess their feelings. It’s like in both cases, the person feels like your holding their heart in your hands. They feel like your hostage. They think you have a lot to offer and you are really independent so you wouldn’t need them nor be interested in them. It’s like they tell themselves "what would such a person do with someone like me? I don’t deserve them". They think you are generous and kind, very emotional. As sweet as the marine air, as beautiful as a sea shell. Water seems to be very important to this person. Reminds me of that Aphrodite painting where she’s standing on an oyster. You’re like a goddess/god to them.
They think that you bring so much light and optimism in their life. That your sweetness is a welcomed relief in their chaotic life. They want to bask in the feeling of you. They think a lot of positive things because they idealize you. You’re like an angel to them. A creature so pure that they wish to keep to themselves but are also afraid to hurt. It’s like they think they’re a beast and you’re the beauty. However in their mind there would be no happy ending for the two of you.
Their actions - ace of pentacles, 4 of cups, 5 of wands, 4 of wands, 3 of cups, The Emperor, 3 of wands
This person is doing their best to pretend they don’t care. They look as calm, cool and collected as they possibly can. They want to look professional and disinterested. I’m getting specifically the message that this person hides behind their spouse/partner to avoid being in contact with you or try to convince you there’s nothing going on. So either they would send their partner to interact with you or they would invoke them in conversations. Also they could be showing off their engagement ring as a reminder.
Another thing this person does is that they are always making sure they’re not alone in your presence. So if they interact with you, it will mostly be when there’s important gatherings, especially when there are other people around that they know. This way, their conversation with you would look pretty natural and mundane, even to your eyes. It’s like they’re taking you in doses. They would juggle between times of no contact and contact.
Though they want to look disinterested they also want to look their best, just in case lmao So they would literally puff their chest to look bigger or play with their hair to draw attention on them. They would wear their best outfit or accessories, put themselves in positions of power to impress you. They would act like they’re the next hottest thing. Also they would try to be brave so maybe they would do risky things or like act like a savior around you. Especially if they notice you’re in need of help. They would be the first to nonchalantly offer their help and remind you that "though they’re super busy because of their numerous responsibilities, they would do their best to help you out should you ever be in need ". This person feels really old school lmao Also they seem like the type of person that watches too many unrealistic rom coms lmao (or porn)
Group 2
Their thoughts - 7 of cups, The World, 4 of pentacles, The Empress, 8 of pentacles, knight of swords, 9 of wands
Okay this person’s thoughts are pretty intense and quite horny / kinky. If I felt like writing their actual thoughts for group 1, here I feel like this would be a bit triggering in some way. So I’m gonna describe as best as I can and as respectfully as I can lmao To be completely honest, this person is a simp for you. They want to "drink from you". I’ll leave that to your imagination. They think that you are incredibly attractive and 100% their type. They want to possess you. But they don’t want to rush it. They like the thrill of the chase. They think that they want to lift you up and have you as they please, against the wall or on any surface they could find. They think that the world lies at your feet and that they would give you the world if you asked them to. They think that, being the absolute baddie that you are, you would have a fair amount of options. And that makes them uncomfortable. Because this person doesn’t like to share their "meal". They think that they should carefully plan how they’re going to approach and seduce you because they know you won’t be fooled. They know they have to be clean and clear if they wish to have you by their side. They think you’re feisty and in your power. You bow to no one and take no orders and this person would loooooove to be the only one to "tame" you. They think that you’re a freak in the sheets. That you would match their intensity. Their thoughts are mainly sexual. There isn’t much room for feelings in this person’s mind.
Their actions - The Tower, Ace of cups, Page of swords, page of wands, 8 of swords, 8 of pentacles, 7 of pentacles
This person acts very unpredictably. One day they’re super open and sociable, fun and patient. The other they’re an absolute asshole. It’s like they’re trying to confuse you so that you don’t know where they stand. They appear as immature. They constantly contradict themselves. Either their actions don’t follow their words or it’s like they don’t think things through and just act randomly. They are chaotic in the way they communicate and act. But most of the time they are defensive and put up barriers between the two of you. They’re the type of person that would purposefully ignore your messages, leave you on red and then pretend they didn’t see it because they were "too busy". They play hot and cold basically. As if being shady was the key to success.
This person would also try to provoke meetings with you by inventing problems or persuading people to interact with you so they can get you out of trouble. They would also surprise you in unexpected manners to keep you entertained. Like they would gather information about you from stalking your social media or interrogating people around you and then give you exactly what you needed as they pretend it is only a coincidence. Like "hey I just got this chocolate from someone but I’m sick so I can’t eat them, would you mind eating them? I don’t want to throw them away" when they’ve clearly spent at least a solid hour looking for your favorite chocolate on purpose.
Group 3
Their thoughts - The fool, knight of pentacles, 6 of pentacles, The Emperor, 7 of swords, page of swords
"They look so calm and peaceful, so carefree. I wonder how they can look so good and be so calm when all around them seems so chaotic. They look so tired sometimes and sad even. I wonder if they're okay. They're so put together. I'd like to get close to them but I feel like they wouldn't be open to it. I wish they weren't so uptight. Maybe we could be good friends. Or work together. They seem like a good person. They look like they've been through a lot though. They're so guarded. Aren't they hiding something? Are they really as they appear? I don't know if I can trust them. They're so strong. Even in the face of adversity, they stay true to themselves and kind to others. I admire them for that. It could be so easy to resent or hate people but this person is so genuine. They keep giving though people hurt them. I hope they can protect themselves and stand up for themselves. They don't deserve the hate they get."
Okay for some of you this person knows you from work or school. There are people around you that try to control you or bring you down. Especially, jealous people that want to give you a bad reputation because you don't follow their tracks. This could be true especially if you have a different vision of how work should be done or how people should be treated. They envy your energy and the attention you get. This person you're asking about has good intentions and a good opinion of you but they're confused as to why other people don't seem to see you like they do. They also have a hard time figuring you out. You impress them as much as you scare them. They could be your coworker or maybe a patron that frequently comes to your workplace and has seen your evolution. For others this can be a friend of yours or a family member. I don't get romantic feelings from this group but rather platonic ones. Now it doesn't mean that their opinion and feelings can't change/evolve. This person specifically admires your professional attitude, your strength and resilience. They admire your giving nature and your tendency to give people a chance instead of judging them at first sight.
Their actions - 10 of swords, 6 of pentacles, 4 of swords, knight of wands, Wheel of fortune, ace of pentacles
If this person may have appeared as cold and distant towards you at first, they got warmer as they got to know you and observe you. They like to watch you from a distance. They feel like they can have a more objective view of your essence if they're not involved directly. But at the end of the day, this person can't resist the pull. They had to get closer because they found your energy interesting. So at first, they would remain strictly professional. To the point where sometimes it would be as if they were a ghost. They would pretty much never interact unless it was really important. But most of the time they would remain hidden. But then the wheel turned because something made them take interest in you. Maybe it was something you did or something you said. For some I'm getting that they realised how important you were when you were gone. There was a period of time when you were the one that stopped communicating and it made them ponder about what you were up to and how you were doing. When you came back, this person started to act more friendly. They could have gotten you gifts or offered help, which they wouldn't have done before.
They acted differently for sure. More open to conversation, more present in your life, offering practical advice or helping you even before you asked. For some I'm getting the sense of someone leaving positive reviews or giving you extra cash, leaving littles notes on your desk to cheer you up. Trying to get the community around you to support you more by talking to other people about how nice of a person you are and changing the general opinion of you. For some this person would even take your defense in public without you being aware, trying to restore your honor. They feel more protective over you. Kind of like a surrogate dad or a mentor energy. When they got to see you, for some I'm getting the mental image of someone trying to uplift somebody else's spirit by shyly giving compliments in the disguise of a joke. Like for instance they would playfully comment your outfit but manage to tell you it looks good on you in the process. I felt the need to ask spirit for more information so I drew another card from the deck. You got The Star and The Devil. On the first card there's a female figure pouring water into a pond while she fondly looks at two cranes sitting nearby. There's a third crane in her back that she's not aware of. The other shows a feminine character with one blind eye and a mischievous look.
I'm getting several possibilities looking at this combination. One the one hand, it kinda confirms what I've been saying about this person protecting you and acting behind your back. As the Star card can be related to the Internet and the Devil card can represent naysayers/people with bad intentions, it shows that this person has been defending you online. I'm getting a scenario where a group of people is having a private conversation on any social platform where they talk baldly about you or make fun of you. And either this person has been calling these people out or they went as far as to threaten them of filing a complaint in your name. On the other hand, these two cards could be showing that this person is two faced. They may act kind and sweet in front of your face, but talk badly about you behind your back. Or, if they're not dissing you, at least they're playing the game to get favors out of you. For instance, they could be complimenting you a lot, hoping you'd forget something they did or said about you that hurt you.
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