#I’m baffled. like. why not. it’s fun. come be perfectly reasonable and normal about these characters with me.

[ssruis]

I always love your character thoughts posting btw

Aww thank u... I always feel a little bad when I dump screenshots without saying anything beyond “hey look @ this”. Esp because half the time it’s me making random connections in my head, going “yeah other ppl will get what I’m saying” & not explaining myself as if spending hours going through everything wxs related 2 or more times a month to make some random point is a universal experience.

[waka-chan-out]

“You Asked For It.”

post-timeskip, obviously.

word count: 3.6k

content warning: PEGGING, established relationship, established safeword (not used), orgasm denial, hand job, fingering (m. receiving), light teasing because it’s tsukishima, tsukki calls you ma’am twice, lots of swearing

also featuring: hinata, kageyama, bokuto, akaashi, kuroo, and kenma

“Hey, Tsukki dude, it’s your turn!” Bokuto said, knees happily bouncing against the carpeted floor. Tsukki rolled his eyes and shot you a glance. You smiled, looking back at him over the girl that sat between you. Though neither of you were party people, you knew he’d have been upset if he missed this. The old volleyball club boys only got together every so often, so you had to drag him out of the apartment whenever it happened. Even though he was back to being his normal, slightly grump self, you could tell he was happy. Living with him for the past six months had made it much easier to read him, even when he seemed like he had an expression spectrum that spanned from a smirk to a frown.

“Alright,” he said, holding up his six remaining fingers. “Never have I ever hooked up with someone on one of the old volleyball teams.”

“Oo, that’s a good one,” Hinata said, glancing around eagerly at everyone’s hands. You put down a finger. Easy, obvious answer. There was hesitation in the rest of the group.

“What qualifies as hooking up?” Kageyama asked.

“Why do you need to know, Tobio? Got something to confess?” Kuroo teased. Kageyama’s eyebrow’s furrowed.

“I’m not asking for myself. I just think it’s important to clarify.”

“Whatever you say.” Kuroo chuckled, leaning back on his hands. He sat between two girls that you didn’t know. Apparently, Bokuto had arranged the gathering and didn’t exactly narrow down the guest list to old volleyball players, so though a lot of the old team members were there, some random people had attended and things got out of hand fairly quickly.

“Let’s say making out and beyond just to sate my own curiosity.” Tsukki continued. “You don’t have to specify if you don’t want to.” There was a cough from across the circle and Bokuto shifted awkwardly.

“How many fingers do you have, Bo?” you asked. He holds up four.

“How many did you have?” Akaashi asked, leaning forward from where he sat next to him, legs crossed carefully.

“It’s not my fault you guys weren’t paying attention,” Bokuto said, sticking his nose in the air.

“I think he had five,” Hinata said.

Kageyama laughed loudly. “I’m pretty sure Akaashi put a finger down too.”

“Akaashiiiiiii!” Bokuto said, leaning over onto his setter.

“Get off of me, Bokuto-san.”

“They’re being crazy. Tell them, Akaashi.”

“Tsukishima said we didn’t have to specify.”

Tsukki and Kuroo were doubled over in fits of laughter, clearly unsure what to make of what was going on.

“Someone else needs to hurry up and take their turn before Bokuto-san cries.”

“Akaashiiiiii!”

“Okay, okay,” the girl next to you said. “Never have I ever participated in…” she trailed off and looked embarrassed.

“Just say it,” Kuroo said, still laughing a bit.

“Anal,” she mumbled, immediately covering her mouth with her hands. Several laughs broke out across the group as a handful of fingers went down amongst the boys. You hesitated, winced, and put your finger down, hoping no one would notice. Tsukki looked at you, surprised. The girl that had asked the question grabbed your wrist.

“Oh my god, you’re the only girl that said yes! Was it awful? Did it hurt? Was it good? I don’t trust their answers.” You look at Tsukki with wide eyes, then back to her.

“Uhm, I don’t know if I can really answer those.”

“Oh come on,” Kuroo said. “It’s all for fun. Nothing leaves the circle. I think we’re all curious.”

“No, I’m not embarrassed,” you said, laughing. “I just genuinely can’t answer those questions. I wasn’t the one receiving.” The girl squeaked and Kuroo’s mouth fell wide open.

“Tsukki, did--”

“Nope,” he responded forcefully. Bokuto let out a guffaw and held out his hand for a high five. You gave him a gentle one, laughing with the group but cringing a bit when you looked back at Tsukki. He didn’t look upset, just dumbstruck.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So . . . that was interesting,” you said as you laid down on your bed, trying to get in the first word.

“What was?” Tsukishima asked, nonchalantly taking off his jacket. You laughed.

“You know exactly what.”

He scoffed. “I thought it was obvious that Bokuto-san and Akaashi were hooking up, but I guess everyone was pretty surprised.”

“God, Kei, I’m talking about the anal question.”

“Of course you are.”

“Obviously.”

“I mean, good for you I guess. I didn’t know you had that dominant side in you.” He removed his shirt and walked into the bathroom. You called in after him.

“What does that mean? Of course I have that side.” You heard him scoff. “Don’t fucking laugh at me, Kei, you know it’s true.”

“Sure it is, love.”

“Yes, it absolutely is. I just didn’t want to embarrass you.”

He peeked around the corner, brows furrowed. “How would you embarrass me?”

“Please, Kei. We both know you’re secretly submissive. If I went full dom you’d never want to go back.” His eyes widened.

“You think I’m submissive? What gave you that impression?” Poor thing. He looked genuinely baffled.

“You just have that vibe, babe. You’re a brat.”

“You’re the brat here.”

“I am, but you’d be much more fun to tame.”

He huffed and leaned against the doorframe.

“You know what?” he asked. “Fucking try me.”

“Are you serious?” you said. Your eyebrows raised and a smile crept onto your lips.

“Don’t look so excited. I won’t give you an easy time about it.”

“But you’ll let me?”

“We have a safeword for a reason.”

“Okay, Kei. You asked for it.”

“No, I didn’t. You did. Now let me take my shower, dumbass. Kuroo was clinging to me all night and I feel disgusting.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The bathroom door opened and Kei reentered the room, his hair curly and sticking up in the front, a towel wrapped around his waist. His whole body looked pink and damp where it had recovered from the water but not the heat. Your eyes followed him as he walked to his closet, head not lifting from the wall where he had left you. He began to open the closet door but noticed you studying him in the mirror.

“What?” he spat. You smirked.

“You’re pretty,” you said. He furrowed his brows and stared at you, trying to make sense of your words.

“You’re a dumbass.”

“You don’t know how to take a compliment.” He scoffed. You laughed, lifting yourself off the wall and moving on all fours towards him. You hung your legs hanging over the side of the mattress, hips about even with his with the height of the bed.

“I set stuff up for you,” you teased. He looked wildly around the room, eyes settling on the bottle of lube on your bedside table. He gestured to it.

“Is that all?” he asked. You smiled.

“Of course not, but I think it’s more fun if you don’t get intimidated by . . . you know.”

He flushed. “I wouldn’t be intimidated. I’m doing this for you.”

“Kei. Baby. No, you aren’t.”

“I could pull out the word right now.”

“But you won’t, will you?” You reached out and grabbed him by the towel, right where it was tucked in to stay in place. You pulled him to you, placing him right between your legs. He raised an eyebrow. Your hips lined up perfectly but he still towered over you. You wrapped your arms around his neck. “That’s what I thought.”

His hands fell to your waist. He leaned in for a kiss but you pulled back. He rolled his eyes. “Are you really going to try making this a whole thing?”

You smiled and combed your hands through his messy, damp hair.

“I do think you’re pretty, Kei,” you mumbled.

“Will you shut up about that?” he said through a breathy laugh. Your grip on his hair tightened and you pulled his head back. He grunted in surprise.

“Don’t try to act so tough, Kei. I know you want this.”

“You have no idea what I want.”

“I think I do.” You reached down and palmed him through his towel. He hissed and stared at you, eyes wide. “I think you’ve wanted this for so long you can’t stand it, but you’re too stubborn to ask for it.” He opened his mouth to reply, but just as soon closed it and squeezed his eyes shut. You laughed and released your hold on him. He inhaled deeply and stared down at you, a distant look in his eye. “Why don’t you come up here with me?” you asked. He shook his head but climbed up onto the bed anyway. You immediately swung a leg over him and looped your arms around his neck.

“We’re playing that game, are we?” he said.

“Honey, you haven’t seen half my game.” The defiance he tried to plaster on his face faltered as you rocked your hips against his. “You know--” you said, continuing the motion. “You said I don’t know what you want, but it keeps getting easier to tell.”

“I--fuck. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Are you sure?” you asked, leaning in so you could whisper in his ear. “Because I can feel how much you want me right between my legs.” You planted a gentle kiss on the shell of his ear and pushed his chest back so he was lying against the bed, moving your hips harder against him. He bit back a sound and closed his eyes, fingers pressing into your sides. You pulled his glasses off of his face and leaned over to the side table, exchanging them for the small bottle of lube. His eyes opened when he heard the familiar snap of the lid.

“What--” he started.

“Shh, baby. We’re gonna have fun.” You squeezed some out into your hand and untucked his towel, grabbing his cock. He let out a sharp breath. You leaned down and kissed him deeply, grabbing one of his hands with your own and pinning it gently next to his head as you started to move your other hand. His free hand found its way into your hair and tugged a bit. It was cute how he tried to act like he was still in control.

“You’re--hah-- you’re really going for it, aren’t you babe?” he said, pulling back from your lips. You responded by moving your hand faster. His head twitched forward, pressing his forehead against yours. His heavy breathing turned into a laugh. “God, if you wanted me so bad you just had to say please.”

You smiled, staring down at his furrowed eyebrows. Something about having him in this position made you want to tear him in half, leaving him a begging mess that wouldn’t recover for weeks.

“Why don’t you tell me when you’re about to come, huh?” You focused your efforts on the head of his cock and he let out a whine, immediately clapping a hand over his mouth.

“No no, baby, I want to hear you.” You planted a kiss on his hand and he moved it to the side. “Good. Good boy.”

“Fuck. I’m close.” His eyes were squeezed shut, hips twitching slightly as he approached his release.

“Yeah? You wanna finish?” He didn’t respond. “Kei.” Still didn’t respond. You pulled your hand away immediately, sitting up and staring down at him as his face screwed up and he ducked his head forward.

“You bitch,” he groaned. You smiled and ran your hands down his chest as he caught his breath.

“You didn’t answer my question,” you said, fake pouting.

“Are you serious? What the fuck is your game today?”

You grinned. “You know exactly what my game is, babe, you just aren’t playing nice.”

“What did you expect?”

“Oh, I expected you to act just like this.” You wrapped your hand around him again and his eyes rolled. “I’m just gonna knock it out of you.” He didn’t have a comeback to that one. You moved your hand faster, staying in a seated position so you could watch him react.

“You like this, don’t you? You’re always such a brat but you just need someone to put you in your place.”

“Slow down, babe. Fuck.” He covered his face with his hands as his hips involuntarily twitched.

“If you want me to slow down, you know the word you have to say.”

His eyes flew open and he glared up at you.

“You gonna say it?” You concentrated on the head again and his eyes fluttered.

“No. Fuck. Shut up.”

You smiled and continued the motion. You could see his muscles tensing and relaxing, mouth never quite closing around a silent moan. “Are you going to tell me when you’re close, Kei?” He didn’t respond again. “Tsukishima. I swear to god you won’t finish a single time tonight if you don’t fucking answer me.”

“I--fuck.”

Not a response. You pulled your hand away.

His hips rolled up and his head pressed back into the pillow. He let out a string of expletives and his voice shook a bit as he spoke. His breathing was heavy and he put his hands over his face again. You watched with a small smile, running a finger lightly up his length just to watch him squirm.

“Are you--fuck--fucking serious?” he gasped.

“I’m sorry, did you want to finish?” You feigned confusion.

“Shut the fuck up.”

“You aren’t asking nicely, Tsukki,” you teased, using the name his friends called him.

“What the hell do you want me to say? I’m not begging you for anything.”

“Your choice.” You dragged your hand back up and he gasped, head leaning back. You left your hand there, lightly teasing the head of his dick with your thumb.

“Can I finish?” You smiled patiently and shook your head. “Can I finish, please?”

“Closer. You forgot something, though, babe. I always call you sir. What should you call me?”

“Absolutely not.”

“How about ma’am?”

“No.”

“Your choice,” you said with a shrug, starting to move your hand on his cock again. He breathed heavily, climbing quickly after being denied twice already. His moans caught in his throat, sounding desperate but restrained.

“Fuck, babe,” he mumbled. “Fuck.” You could feel him twitch slightly in your hand as his lips fell open in a silent moan.

“All you have to do is ask nicely,” you sang, slipping your other hand down and gently rubbing at his entrance. His entire body twitched and he groaned loudly. “There it is. I knew you’d enjoy this. Why don’t you just ask nicely and we can have some fun?”

He mumbled something that you couldn’t understand.

“You’re going to have to speak up, Kei.” He moaned as you slowed down your hand on his cock, letting him focus on both sensations at once.

“Fuuuck.” The word came out of him in a long groan.

“You want my fingers inside of you, don’t you? Don’t deny it, babe. I see your face.” He inhaled sharply as you circled his entrance again.

“Yes.”

You moved your hand off of his cock and spanked his thigh lightly, a small punishment for not addressing you properly. He twitched and made a low noise at the loss.

“I’ll let that one slide. Just relax,” you hummed, grabbing the lube and seating yourself between his legs. You warmed it up on your fingers and pressed against his entrance, bending his legs a little at the knee to make it easier for both of you.

“You alright, love?” you asked. He nodded quickly and you pushed one finger inside. You went slow, letting him adjust to the new sensation, but the long groan he let out when you were fully inside him was worth the wait.

“There you go. Feels good, doesn’t it? You want me to move?” He nodded again, mouth hanging open. “Okay, love, stay relaxed.” You slowly started moving your finger until he felt comfortable around you. Once you could see his shoulders start to relax, you curled your finger slightly. His hips jumped and he swore loudly.

“Good boy. Taking it so well.”

His breathing picked up as you continued moving.

“I’m gonna add another one. Is that alright, Kei? You want more?” He sighed heavily and surprised you when he opened his mouth.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Good boy.” You smiled. “So eager.” You gently pressed another finger into him. His eyes shut tightly at the sensation and he moaned quietly. You continued the motion, curling and scissoring your fingers until he felt ready. He was melting at your touch, still trying to maintain some composure but mostly allowing you to take control. You couldn’t wait for him to unravel.

“I think you’re ready, love. You doing okay?” He nodded, covering his face with his forearm as you climbed off the bed, reaching into your closet to retrieve your strapon.

It was thin, a decent length, and bright pink. It was a gag gift from a friend, but little did they know you were genuinely into that. You secured it and returned to your boyfriend, who stared at it nervously.

“Still alright, Kei?” you asked. He nodded. “What position do you want to be in?” His eyes widened.

“This, I guess?” He patted the bed from where he was laying.

“Perfect. I want to be able to see you.” His face went bright red. You climbed up between his legs, wetting the strap with lube and leaning down to kiss him. You were gentle, letting him push against your lips and wrap his arms around you. You lined up with his entrance and hesitated as he hissed.

“You’re okay, love,” you said, pressing a kiss on his nose. “I’ve got you. I’ll go slow.” He nodded slightly and closed his eyes, tipping his head back against the pillow. He looked so pretty like this. You were going to have to top him more often. “Just relax . . .”

You began pushing forward, gently and slowly. He was prepared well so there wasn’t much resistance. You kissed his exposed neck, whispering quiet encouragements in his ear.

“You’re doing so well, Kei. Such a good boy for me. You’re alright?” He nodded, letting out a small moan. “Almost there, love. You want all of me? Huh?” He tipped his head back up, pulling your face to his and laying a surprisingly harsh kiss on you.

“Please.” It was so quiet you could barely make it out, but he knew you heard him, face flushed. You bottomed out in him, chasing a deep groan out of his lips.

“Good boy. You want me to move? Tell me what you want, baby.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he said. Every time he said it chills shot down your spine. “Please.” You smiled and pressed your lips against his, bracing your hands on either side of him as you drew your hips back and pushed back into him.

The sound he made was shocking, high pitched and lewd and not at all like himself.

“Shit. Keep making that noise and I’m never going to stop, Kei.” His face was permanently blushed but you see his eyebrows furrow in embarrassment.

You continued moving your hips, keeping a slow but steady pace as he pressed his forehead against yours and continued swearing. It was delicious. He occasionally let out a small whine when you hit deeper inside of him. He grabbed your hips suddenly and pulled you farther against him.

“Please,” he said, surprising you.

“What do you want, baby?” you breathed.

“A little--fuck--a little harder.” Holy shit. You happily obliged, driving your hips harder into him. He let out a long groan that ended in a whine, breathing picking up and head tipping back into the pillow. You had a feeling he could come from just this, but just to be nice. . .

“Fuck!” He cried out as you wrapped a hand around his cock, stroking it to the same rhythm as you continued moving your hips into him. You concentrated your efforts around the head so your arm didn’t get tired, not wanting to let up on him until he was a shaking mess. He alternated between groans, whines, and swearing, so loud in your ear that you were sure the people in the next apartment over could hear him. It was shocking how quickly Kei threw away his pride when you really tempted him, and you hated that you didn’t try this sooner.

“Please, can I finish?” he said, planting a sloppy kiss on your face. “Please.” His voice sounded so desperate and you hadn’t even told him he needed permission this time. You were going to let him come either way but, fuck, he sounded so pretty asking.

“Fuck, good boy. Go ahead and come,” you said, and his grip on you tightened into fists as his moans began to sputter.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” he repeated as you kept moving into him. You felt him finishing on your hand, but you couldn’t help yourself. His head tipped up into your chest and he continued swearing. You took away your hand but kept moving your hips even though he was most certainly done.

“Oh god stop,” he begged, head buried against you. “Stop, please stop, stop.” His body twitched violently. He hadn’t said the word, so you knew he was alright. “Fuck! Stop.” You laughed and kissed his forehead, slowing your movements so you were just barely rocking your hips. His head finally tipped back and his body slacked, panting heavily.

“Holy shit, Kei.” You leaned down and peppered his sweaty face with kisses, laughing gently.

“That was . . .” He couldn’t even finish the thought, running his hands through his hair and laughing with you.

“We’re going to have to do that more often.” You pressed a short kiss on his lips and he opened his eyes.

“Don’t you fucking dare tell anyone about this.”

“No promises,” you giggled. His brows furrowed, back to being his normal self again.

“Absolutely fucking not. Don’t even joke about that. I won’t let you do it again.”

You grinned and kissed his nose. “Yes, you will.”

[startanewdream]

Quidditch prodigy

Banner by awesome @the-dream-team​.

Summary: This time, when she tells Harry he will be the new Seeker, Minerva McGonagall says: “Your father will be proud. He is an excellent player himself” (and Harry knows it’s true because he spent years watching his father fly).

For @alec-lightwood-bane, who asked for a bit of James getting to be proud with his Quidditch prodigy. The only plot here is fulfilling your request :)

Now on AO3.

________________

From the first time that Harry mounted the little broomstick that Sirius gave him for his first anniversary, James knew his son would be a Quidditch player (sometimes he’d tell Lily that he knew that ever since he felt Harry kicking inside her, but Lily tells him all babies kick; it was not a signal, no matter how at that moment James was talking about Quidditch).

He is not surprised when brooms are Harry’s favourite gifts and, as his godfather, Sirius is more than willing to replace his brooms as Harry grows up, until, finally, for his eleventh birthday, Harry gets a Nimbus 2000. It is his first professional broomstick and Harry can’t stop talking about it all day, promising he will be a Gryffindor player in no time, discussing with Sirius how unfair it is that First Years don’t get to have their own broom nor play in their house team.

That afternoon, after the sunset when the temperature gets milder, they play a kind of five-person Quidditch, which makes no sense and have no rules other than Sirius and Lily are a team, James and Harry is another, and everyone needs to score a goal against Remus, who is a moderately good Keeper.

Harry spends most of the time trying to learn how to ride the broom, so very different from the juvenile models he trained before, mostly intercepting the passes between his mother and Sirius than actually scoring goals. It’s not his son’s best performance, but James says nothing, only ruffling Harry’s hair and making it even more messy than flying already did it.

Harry flies well, naturally, but as a Chaser he always seemed to lack something. He works twice because of it, and James supports him.

The next morning, James awakes at dawn for no good reason. He plans to go downstairs only to drink some water before going back to bed and just laying there, but when he arrives at the kitchen, he finds the backdoor opened.

His wand is at ready at once, but it’s only Harry flying at dawn. He stops at the doorway, watching his son. He really flies perfectly — and boldly, he notices, training movements that James is sure he didn’t teach him and that Lily would have a fit if she saw, long dives that end with him recovering from it at the least possible moment, loops in the air that make him stand thirty feet in the air hanging on his broom only with one hand.

It is like watching him doing an extremely dangerous dance, and James makes sure his wand is ready, just in case, though he feels it’s not the first time Harry is doing this. It looks too well practiced for it. 

And it’s not the usual Chaser movements either.

This thought comes for him at the same time that Harry picks up a Golden Snitch from his pocket. He closes his eyes and lets the Snitch fly away, waiting a few seconds until he opens his eyes and flies upward, standing very still fifty feet up, only his eyes moving, concentrated. James can’t see anything different, but after one minute, Harry dives suddenly. When he recovers from the flight, the Golden Snitch is secure in his hand, its wings flying pointless in his closed hand.

His laugh fills the silence of the morning.

When James starts applauding, Harry’s laugh dies. He turns to his father’s direction, his face reddening and a mortified expression arising there.

‘Dad — I — I can explain —’

It feels as if his son is confessing a sin, rather than showing his talents, and James doesn’t understand.

‘What?’

‘This, I —’

‘Well, I must admit I’m upset’, James says, his voice teasingly, but Harry doesn’t seem to notice this. ‘Next time, you should tell me’.

‘I didn’t want — I mean, this is just for fun, I don’t really —’

‘Flying without inviting me? I am so disappointed’.

Harry pauses, dismounting his broom and holding it unsurely. ‘You are not mad because I was playing Seeker?’

James blinks, confused. ‘Why should I? You are natural!’

Harry looks at his feet. ‘We always trained chasing. You are a Chaser’.

‘Yeah, I was, so?’

‘So I should be one. Like you. Everyone tells me I fly like you, and... I didn’t want to disappoint you’.

James shakes his head, baffled that Harry could come up with that conclusion. Well, there is only way to show him. ‘Mount your broom. Go on’. 

Harry’s eyes are big, not understanding him, but he does as his father says. James keeps motioning for him to go up in the air and, when Harry is fairly high, he transforms the basket of apples in the kitchen into a basket of golf balls, going to the middle of their backyard.

Then he starts throwing one golf ball in the air after another, and Harry understands at once, flying around and catching each one before they fall in the ground, even when James throws more than one at a time. His son is rather breathless when he lands next to his father.

James can only beam. ‘See? You could never disappoint me’.

‘Even if I don’t try for a spot at the team as a Chaser?’

‘Any team will miss much more if you don’t play as Seeker’. Harry lets out a laugh that is undeniably relieved. James watches his son as they sit in the middle of the garden. ‘I mean it, Harry. Even if you didn’t play at all, I would never be disappointed with you’.

Harry raises his eyebrows, eyes glinting with mischief. ‘Even if I hated Quidditch?’

‘Well, you are right, then I would have to disinherit you’, he says seriously, but Harry’s chuckles in answer tells him that Harry understands his father is only joking. ‘Since when do you practice as a Seeker?’

Harry throws him a sideway look. ‘Two years now’, he says, smirking when James looks surprised. It’s not easy to hide anything from his parents, and yet Harry seemed to have perfected that. ‘Ever since I found this old Snitch in the attic’.

He picks up the Snitch again from his pocket. The Snitch tries to fly away, but when Harry hands it to James, the wings calm suddenly, the Snitch resting peacefully on his father’s hand.

‘Oh, what’s that?’

‘Flesh memories’, James explains, smiling. ‘This is the Snitch I nicked a long time ago at Hogwarts. It was never used before, so since I was the first to catch it…’

‘It remembers you’, Harry finishes, amazed.

‘And I remember it’, James murmurs, letting the Snitch fly and grabbing it easily. Even after all these years, his reflexes are still good, he thinks smugly. ‘I used to try to impress your mother with it, you know’.

‘Did it work?’

James runs his hand through his hair. ‘None at all. I hope you have better luck showing off with the Snitch than I did’.

______________________

Harry writes home twice a week at least, and every one of his letters mention how he misses flying and then that he at least is counting the days for the first flying lesson, so he can be in the air even for a little.

James expects his letter as usual the day after the flying lesson is scheduled, but instead he wakes up to find a grey owl waiting for him at breakfast, watching him severely. Only Minerva McGonagall would have an owl that looks as stern as her, but then again James always remembers how McGonagall’s patronus is herself, so he shouldn’t be so surprised.

What surprises him is her request that he comes to meet her as soon as possible that morning, informing the Floo Network to her office will be opened.

It seems serious and he can’t help but think of something happening to Harry. His son’s owl is nowhere at sight, though.

He scribbles a note to Lily informing he will be out for a chat with McGonagall — it shouldn’t be news to her since they met at least once a month to talk about the updates in the Transfigurations field — and quickly vanishes inside the green flames.

She is expecting him when he arrives, looking over a few scrolls.

‘James’, she says, the weirdest of the expressions on her face. She seems satisfied. ‘Have a seat’.

‘Hello, Professor’, he says, slipping into the old formality without even noticing. He usually meets her at the Three Broomsticks, rarely coming into her office. It always brings him memories of his years at school, and he almost expects to find the Head Boy badge pinned to his clothes.

‘You seem tense’, she notes, watching him over her glasses. ‘Take a biscuit’.

He does. Her biscuits are really tasty, but sitting in front of her, waiting for her to talk, makes him feel like he has just done a prank and is about to get a detention.

‘You must be wondering why I called you here’.

That makes him grin. Jokes were always his remedy to diffuse any situation. ‘I reckon you missed me’.

‘Hardly, when I see a copy of you everyday in the halls’, she replies easily, almost smiling. ‘Your son is less loud, though’.

‘Well, he did get a lot of Lily’.

‘Unfortunately not her disposition to follow rules’, Minerva notes, sipping her tea calmly.

‘Uh’, James hesitates, unsure. It’s not normal to call a parent for any misconduct (or else his parents would never leave McGonagall’s office), so if she called him here… ‘What happened?’

‘You know we have some rules that are stricter than others. For instance, this year the third floor corridor is absolutely forbidden’.

Years of ignoring rules make James want to ask what’s there, or else go discover for himself, but he just nods.

‘And one of the rules we always follow is to expressly forbid First Years of owning a broom’.

‘Hum’, he mumbles, still unsure. Harry knows that rule (he certainly complained a lot), and James is sure he saw the Nimbus 2000 waiting patiently in their broomshed, so he doesn’t get what’s her point.

‘Your son is bound to break that rule this year’.

‘He brought his broom?’, James asks before he can think through it, his mind trying to understand how Harry got to replace his broom with a fake copy so he could smuggle it to the castle. There is a mild impression, but if Harry did it, he would be in serious trouble…

‘No, not yet, I was hoping you could send it. He told me has a Nimbus 2000, is that correct?’

Feeling like he is missing the point still, James nods.

‘Good. If you could send it next week, it would be perfect. I am still getting the board’s signature of approval, but it’s only a formality, Albus already authorized it’.

‘Minerva’, he interrupts her. ‘What is happening?’

‘Oh’, she stops, looking simply delighted. ‘Yesterday during his first flying lesson, your son took to the skies after some silly gibbering with the Malfoy boy. As you may know, Rolanda is quite loud about how any First Year that flies unsupervised gets expelled. Or, well, a detention at least, but we don’t tell them that. First Years are so inclined to follow the rules… present company excepted, of course’.

James smiles guiltily now. But even he, desperate as he was to join the team, followed that rule at least. Madame Hooch really imposed fear.

‘What happened then?’

‘I saw him through my window’, Minerva tells him, pointing to the window next to her, that provides a nice view of the grounds. ‘Fifty-foot dive, recovered without a single scratch. Did you teach him that?’

James raises his eyebrows. ‘No, actually, he taught himself’.

‘Well, he is a natural, that I can’t deny. So I made him the new Seeker’.

‘Hum, what?’

‘Seeker’, she replies, not bothering to hide her smirk now. ‘I know you’ve been long gone from the Quidditch field, but you do remember what a Seeker is, I am sure’.

Later he will appreciate the fact that Minerva McGonagall is teasing him. For now there is only bewilderment.

‘But — seeker — no First Year — he must be the youngest Quidditch player in decades —’

‘A century, actually’, she corrects him. ‘I checked the records’.

‘That’s — that’s amazing! I am so —’, he stops, staring at her. ‘He broke a rule and you are awarding him?’

Minerva looks moderately embarrassed. ‘It’s not an award. I expect him to train harder to compensate for the years the other Seekers have of advantage, and if he doesn’t seem to take this seriously, I will reconsider not punishing him — oh, stop smirking, Potter’.

She looks suddenly stern again, but James can’t help himself.

‘You have a soft spot for him!’, he declares, grinning. 

‘I certainly do not play favourites’, she answers, voice full of dignity. ‘I only think of what’s best for Gryffindor and —’, she drops all pretenses suddenly. ‘— you should have seen the try outs! Wood, that’s the captain, Oliver Wood, was crying at the end because no one was able to even find the Golden Snitch. And after last year…’ She shakes her head. ‘If it means we won’t get flatten out by Slytherin ever again — that annoying smirk on Snape’s face —, oh, well, I would buy your son a broom myself!’

James smiles proudly now. There was always a fanatical Quidditch enthusiast in Minerva and he adores when it shows. And from all he knows of Snape, he will hate the fact that James Potter’s son is in the team in his First Year, which is only a bonus (though that is a thing he won’t admit out loud).

‘No need. I will make sure he is dedicating himself, but knowing Harry, he is just too marvelled at being part of the team. It’s what he most wanted’.

She sighs, somberer now.

‘And that’s why I called you, actually. Considering your long history of disregarding rules, this Seeker position is not to mean that your son will get away with everything. I’d rather have him go through his school years without too many detentions’.

‘Only a few?’, James teases.

‘Let’s aim for one third of yours and I will call it a success. He is a Potter after all’.

James nods, trying for a serious expression that’s broken by the fact he can’t stop beaming. His son. First Year Seeker! He can’t wait until he tells Sirius.

‘Oh, I will talk to him’, he assures her. ‘We can’t let detentions get in the way of Quidditch’.

____________________

[cocoartistwrites]

Hogwarts School Trip. Except instead of a museum or a chocolate factory Dumbledore thinks it'll be fun to send them back in time. Bonus points for Tomione but pls have fun with this prompt

ily so much

The whole year wakes up early. Even Justin Finch-Fletchly is on time, and Justin is never seen before noon. All they’ve been told is they’re going on a trip to learn more about the Wizarding World, they’re to be at the edge of the forest by six in the morning on the dot, Professor Dumbledore is taking them, and they’re to wear their school robes and bring a wand and absolutely nothing else, not even snacks.

Ron has snacks anyway. Professor McGonagall takes them off him with a very disappointed, A member of my own house and a shake of her bun.

Their names are called out alphabetically. All they’re told is they’re getting a disillusionment charm from the Headmaster. This is the most contact every student except Harry Potter has ever had with Dumbledore, but he knows most of their names anyway.

[The problem is, once they’re disillusioned, the professors can’t quite corral them. Hermione can’t help but think they should have waited until they were inside the strange glowing golden circle. Perhaps that way Professor McGonagall wouldn’t have had to go to fetch Neville, Seamus and Ernie, and she wouldn’t have been left behind, and it wouldn’t have turned into complete chaos.]

“Where do you reckon we are?” Ron asks, once they’ve all finished gasping for breath and being sick. “Looks the same to me.”

“Well, I think it is the same,” Hermione says. “But that tree was definitely smaller?”

“Well-deducted, Granger,” Draco Malfoy sneers. “One can really see how you got all those OWLS.”

“Didn’t realise you were counting,” she snaps back (with charm of course, she’s learning how to deal with his bullying).

“A school trip from Hogwarts to… Hogwarts. So glad I woke up early,” Justin Finch-Fletchley mutters. “I’m missing a weekend shooting at Linhope for this.”

Hermione bites back a smile at the absolutely baffled, yet disdainful, muttering this provokes from Ron and Harry. Tea with the queen and well, pardon, your highness and lagabed, which, surely is a prime Mrs Weasley word. She grasps their robes.

“Why couldn’t he have done the spell now?” she hisses. “Everything’s shimmering, I feel like I’ve taken acid.”

“Well, well,” Professor Dumbledore says, “it seems we’re mostly here and partially present and correct. You’re no doubt curious to know where i have brought you-”

“Looks like Hogwarts to me,” Malfoy’s snide voice carries. “Fascinating.”

[“Where did Nev go-” “McGonagall was still-” “-too early or we were late or what?”]

There is absolutely no obvious point to this trip to 99.1% of the year. They in 1943, at Hogwarts. It’s a perfectly normal school day. The 0.9% is Harry, Ron, and Hermione who are confronted with Tom Riddle in the flesh and have absolutely no idea why.

“There’s no way the Ministry approved this,” Hermione hisses to Harry.

“I’m sure he has his reasons,” he replies, unreasonably.

“You see here the teenage Lord Voldemort,” Dumbledore announces behind his silencing ward, as they trail to Potions behind a group of Slytherin sixth years. “Just like any of you, except of course born evil.”

He hums. A group of First Years coming the other way are knocked over by the group of several dozen time-travellers.

The disillusionment charms start wearing off halfway through the lesson, and it’s only then that it becomes obvious they’ve lost more of the year than were left behind in 1995.

“Ah,” Dumbledore says, recasting them too late, “I was distracted by the wafts of - well, hello Horace…”

“Who’re you?’ Tom Riddle asks Hermione. He’s not looking at any of the others.

“Ministry Observation Group,” she snaps. “Carry on, Riddle.”

“How do you know-”

“I think it’s time we-”

“Where’s Goyle?”

“My goodness, Weasley, do you ever stop eat-”

They crowd into the corridor, Dumbledore’s obliviation charms flying thick and fast. He doesn’t notice the new addition, and nor does anyone else, until Hermione is pulled into an alcove off the ground-floor corridor.

The others have vanished around the corridor when Tom Riddle’s Finite takes effect on both of them. She misses the Unspeakables’ entrance, is told later there were an unprecedented fifteen of them. Misses the castle-wide manhunt for Crabbe and Goyle, later found sleeping by the Black Lake. Misses the general chaos of it all.

“You’re from the future, aren’t you? I saw old Greybeard back there,” Tom Riddle says. “Legilimens.”

Hermione, no Occlumens, is no match for this. She is, however, a match for the obliviation he tries and for his imperius. He’s not that good, as it turns out, not yet.

He is, however, a very good kisser. He pushes her back into the stone wall and she almost falls for that one. She doesn't though.

Her full body-bind has him crashing off her lips, hands still curved around her waist, pulling her with him as he descends.

She scrambles free and runs back to the forest where they entered just as everyone is tumbling into the circle again, this time supervised by the cloaked Unspeakables.

No one, not even Hermione, realises they’ve taken someone with them until they get home.

[fairy-spring]

Take to the Skies - 7/?

~.*.~.*.~

I’m sorry this has taken so long to update. I’ve just moved in with my boyfriend, and I’m finally trying to dip my toe back into writing.

~.*.~.*.~

| 1 || 2 || 3 || 4 || 5 || 6 |

… She was staring again. The little girl with auburn hair and lime green eyes. Link was fairly sure he’d caught her staring quite a few times before. She was the daughter of the city’s top healer, from what he’d heard, which meant she’d pass through here every single day. Normally she’d be here with her father, or at least with a small group of friends. Why was she alone today, of all days?

“Oh, don’t pay her any mind,” Silas scoffed. “No need to be so embarrassed. She likes to watch everyone when they’re training.”

“Why’s that?” Orville questioned, his head tilted to one side. Silas merely rolled his eyes, as if the answer was the simplest thing in the world.

“Because,” he stressed, “we nobles always watch the page boys and the squires while they’re training!”  

Link squinted his eyes as he took in Silas’ words. He wasn’t blind to the goings-on around him, and neither was Orville. They perfectly understood that such things did happen. After all, random members of nobility poked their heads in to observe their shenanigans, well, every day. At least, that was how it felt.

“But why?” he repeated for his friend. “Why do they watch us all the time?”

“Because it’s entertaining to them.” Silas sighed as he shook his head. “Honestly, don’t you bumpkins understand anything?”

Link gritted his teeth, his grip tightening on his wooden sword. The nerve of this kid! They were the exact same age, and here he was acting like he was so much mightier and holier than the both of them! Link was pretty sure pride was a sin; perhaps even the cardinal sin, if memory served him correctly. The blond smirked at the thought, and he opened his mouth to speak.

“Ya know, Si-”

“Hey, can I play too?”

A small dust cloud picked up behind the young lady as she bolted her way over to the trio of boys, catching Link completely off-guard. It was the same little girl who was watching them earlier; auburn hair, big green eyes... She was bouncing up and down on the balls of her little feet, and she hummed to herself as she held her balled-up little fists over either side of her head. Evidently, the girl’s excitement could barely be contained.  

“Huh?!” Orville exclaimed, obviously perplexed by the situation. “L-Little girl, you can’t-!”

“Why, young lady,” Silas interrupted, suddenly bent over in a courteous bow to the redhead. “I’m afraid this isn’t mere play, my dear. This is serious training for knights-to-be, such as myself.”

Link glared daggers at the raven-haired boy, and he scoffed as he crossed his arms. The nerve of this guy, pulling a complete one-eighty like that. He shared a glance with Orville, who could only roll his eyes as Silas continued attempting to sate the little girl’s curiosity and shoo her away. The more he talked, however, the more she pouted, her brow creased and her lips pressed in a firm line.

“But, but, but, but...” She slowly lowered her arms and placed her hands behind her, and she shifted her weight between her feet.

“Besides, don’t you have other young ladies you could play with instead?” Silas smiled warmly, a stark contrast to his usual smarmy smirk. “I’m sure they’re all dying to spend time with you, young lady.”

“They’re all in the chapel with Mother Aleesha,” she whined as she slumped over. “And I can’t go till later!”

“I’m very sorry to hear that... Well, you can always watch, but I’m afraid I can’t let such a fragile young lady get into harm’s way.” Upon saying this, he gestured to Link and Orville, and he let out a soft chuckle. “I fear what would happen if you were to roughhouse with blacksmiths’ sons.”

“Hey!”  

Link thrust his wooden sword towards Silas, in defiance of his backhanded niceties. Silas easily sidestepped the boy and tripped his right leg, sending him spiraling to the ground. With a sigh, the dark-haired boy addressed the little girl again, as if Link was a mere annoyance. Orville scrambled to help his friend off the ground, silently asking if he was alright. The blond could only nod in reply, wiping the dirt off his tunic as he glared once again at the little bastard before them.

“You see what I mean, lady Celine?” Silas shook his head again and reached out his hand for the girl to take. “These boys are so hotheaded, I fear what they’d do to someone so gentle!”

Celine didn’t grab for Silas’ hand, however. Instead, she was staring directly at Link. Almost reflexively, the boy turned his head away. She was about to say something too, huh? No doubt, she was going to scoff or snicker or say something in agreement with Silas, and he’d have to deal with ridicule not just from them, but from the entire circle of nobles in the fortress! The redhead stepped towards him and Orville, and he flinched at the thought of what she’d do.  

However, no ridicule came. No mockery or shame reached his ears. Instead, the girl eyed him sympathetically, and she asked, “Are you okay?”

Link’s eyes widened at her words. Though it was such a simple question, he never would have expected it to come out of a noble; especially after the way Silas had treated the both of them...

“I...” Suddenly, he was lost for words, and he could only bring himself to nod once again, pale blond hair bouncing as he did. Celine was beaming upon seeing his response, and she giggled as she grabbed his abandoned training sword and hopped next to Orville.  

“Then, will you guys play with me?”

Orville was just as baffled as Link, his mouth hung open for a solid couple seconds before he could speak.  

“W... Why are you asking us?” He motioned between himself and his friend, eyes squinted at the little redhead. Clearly, something was up with this girl. “I thought bumpkins were dangerous.”

“Yeah, well, you guys seem like fun!” Her lime-green eyes shined in the light as she beamed at the pair. With an impish giggle, she held the sword out to Link for him to take. “Come on, Forge, don’t you want to play?”

The blond raised his brow in questioning, and he hesitantly accepted the training sword.

“... Forge?”

“Yeah, Forge!” Another giggle from Celine. “You know, because you’re a blacksmith’s son!” She then pointed to Orville, taking the boy aback as he gawked in confusion. “And you’re Smithy!”

“S-Smithy?!”

Orville could barely voice his displeasure with the new nickname, as Celine merely snickered and snatched his own wooden sword from its sheath. The brunet hollered and gave chase to the little girl, fruitlessly swiping his hand out in a poor attempt to take it back. All the while, Celine was gazing intently at Link.

“Come on, Forge, pleeeeease?”  

“I told you, it isn’t play!” Silas suddenly butted in, stepping between her and Orville. He held out a hand to the girl, this time with the expectation for her to return the stolen glorified stick. “My lady, I can’t allow you to get hurt. Please, give it back.”

“Then, will you guys teach me?”

“Absolutely not,” the boy sighed in reply. “A young lady is fair and pure, just like the white goddess. She has no need to get her hands dirty.”

Link rolled his eyes once again. Was this the only reason Silas was so against this? This was for religious reasons?

“Ya know,” the blond started, “ladies around the ranches and the smiths outside the wall have to help their husbands, whether it’s by protecting cattle or firing the coals. Why can’t the lady learn swordplay?”

That alone was enough to get Silas fuming, and Link couldn’t help but smirk at the effect his words had. It looked like the poor noble boy was about ready to burst! It seemed that Celine’s presence was the only thing keeping him from blowing up on Link. Orville was baffled by Link’s remark, his mouth hung open and his hands held in front of him as if asking, “Why?!” The young lady, however, was grinning from ear to ear, clutching Orville’s sword tightly to her chest.

“So, you’ll teach me, Forge?!”

Link looked Silas dead in the eye as he answered Celine.  

“Sure, why not?”

[aitarose]

PROLOGUE | READ CH.1 [UNEDITED]  HERE

PAIRING: Zuko x Waterbender!Reader [fem]

PLOT: Princess Y/N finds herself falling for the young Fire Nation prince with the shy smile. As their feelings grow, the childhood lovers face unimaginable challenges together.

TIMEFRAME: Winter 90 AG

WARNINGS: angst, separation

WORD COUNT: 3.4k

A/N: i’m rewriting the chapters i currently have posted as my writing has improved since i first created this series. the prologue is now a mix of the original work and the leaving the north extra.

SERIES MASTERLIST

Crystal clear streams of water circled in repetition around the young Northern princess. Droplets of water failed to rain down onto the stark icy ground as her control was near to perfection.

Y/N’s arms swayed at her sides, her mind fully concentrated on the actions that she was igniting in her vicinity. Soft hums escaped her lips, finding joy in the calming nature that waterbending brought her.

The waning moonlight sparkled around her, giving her a ghostly look and causing her to look like a lost phantom in the wind. The smile on her face was haunting, the look being of pure and utter bliss.

Her footsteps tread lightly, barely making a path on the snow covered hill. Y/N looked to her left amidst her dance, spotting her shadow against the white powder and grinned at the sight.

All that she could see was her silhouette, which was oozing undeniable joy and freedom. Y/N was at one with her most true self—the cause of that true self being the element of water.

Waterbending was the definition of Y/N’s comfort zone. Having the skill mastered at such a young age was unheard of, but it was also the thing that she loved most in the world.

The members of the Northern tribe commonly said that Y/N’s ambition would be the end of her. That her drive for success and perfection would be her great downfall—but in the six-year-old’s mind, it was the one thing that put her at ease.

That and her favorite person in the entire world. Her favorite person who was just drenched in the formerly suspended water. The person who was glaring at her with the most bothered expression Y/N had ever seen.

“It’s freezing!” Yue cried out, wringing out her hair whilst Y/N laughed, falling to the ground in a fit of giggles. Both girls were drenched in water, their formal attire beginning to stick to their bodies in the cold air.

The baffled expression on Yue’s face gave Y/N more joy than the waterbending itself. It wasn’t uncommon for Y/N to give her half-sister a hard time, but at the end of the day Yue loved her, no matter how far her antics were taken. 

“Oh, so you think this is funny?” Yue raised her eyebrows, placing her hands on her hips in overall amusement. She opened her mouth wide to give Y/N her next dig. “I’m not the one who looks like a sea sponge!”

Y/N scoffed as she pulled at her frozen clothing, blowing the straying strings of hair away from her clouded eyes. A disgusted look dawned her face in retaliation to Yue’s attempt at an insult.

Yue was naturally kind, nearly incapable of showing bitterness and resentment. Even when her words were in good fun, Y/N hated to see her better half act in any negative way. It simply wasn’t her.

Y/N, herself, on the other hand was the polar opposite of Yue. She was hard on the surface, holding her head high, rather than cowering in fear. She knew that the world wasn’t all good or all bad as she was a realist.

The princesses rivaled each other in every way, but also found true balance in the fact. Yue’s reserved nature versus Y/N’s boldness made them the perfect pair. 

However, when they disagreed, though that rarely ever happened, Y/N was always the last to apologize. She’d never admit that she felt inferior to Yue. Their inborn rivalry was unspoken but also undeniable.

As Yue would always have the thing that Y/N wanted most in the world. The one thing that was stolen from her due to her birthright. She’d always be the black sheep of the North without the unconditional love of their people.

The unconditional love that they only showed Yue. Yue who was her half-sister—meaning that half of Y/N wasn’t native to the North, but native to the nation that they feared the most—the Fire Nation.

While Y/N and Yue continued to bicker, chasing each other around in circles and lapping the snowmen that they’d created together, their serene playtime was interrupted by a pair of large arms wrapping around Yue’s waist.

The white-haired girl squealed in surprise, her arms flailed chaotically as Arnook chuckled, watching his two daughters with love in his eyes. As Yue settled in his embrace, he rubbed Y/N’s shoulder gently.

“Spirits, you two feel like icicles.” Arnook’s gaze become concerned. He held Yue in his outstretched arms, inspecting her for any bruises or scratches. “Your mother was worried sick, Yue. You can’t run off without telling us first.”

Yue pouted, pointing at Y/N in exasperation. “Y/N wanted to come out and show me some of her new waterbending moves! I’m sorry, father. We were only having fun.”

Y/N let her head drop as Arnook gave her a disappointed look. He’d told her many times that he didn’t want Yue involved in the progress of her bending as her mastery would also be the reason behind her departure.

The royal chieftain nodded his head, gesturing for Y/N to follow as he carried Yue in his arms back towards the palace. The waterbender trudged behind her father, envying her sister’s state of content.

The walk back to the capital was silent, the only sounds being Yue’s faint snores drifting off in the wind. Y/N’s eyes were on the ground, occasionally lifting to watch her father show his love for her sister.

Her footsteps were light, barely leaving marks of fresh powder on the palace floor as she and Arnook gently closed Yue’s bedroom door. They’d each given her a kiss on the forehead before leaving her to sleep.

Arnook sighed, running a hand down the back of his braided hair. He looked down at his little girl, the one that he’d never meant to have but promised to always protect.

His mind was scrambled, thoughts flying everywhere with no place to settle—whilst Y/N’s soul was unhinged. It was as if it was drifting away, not able to settle in a single place since it never belonged.

“What’s going to happen to me, father?” Y/N whispered, her body shaking in anticipation for what was to come of her fate in the morning. “Why do I have to go away?”

Fear consumed Arnook’s emotions. Fear for the safety of his tribe, the fate of his daughter, the future of his people. He didn’t know what would become of his eldest child—but whatever did happen to Y/N, he knew that it was entirely his fault.

She was only a child. A child that was to be forced to become a slave to the Fire Nation, another pawn in their game to win the war. Arnook had been given six years to raise her under the peace treaty.

The peace treaty that ensured that his eldest waterbending child would be the punching bag of the Fire Nation’s royal family. The treaty that prevented her from having a loving and nurturing childhood.

When he’d first made the deal with Fire Lord Azulon, Arnook hadn’t thought twice about the fate of his future child. He’d agreed for Lady Homura to be sent to the North to mother the infant, not wanting it to be of full Northern blood.

His thought was that if the child was half of Fire Nation genes, he wouldn’t feel so close to it. That he wouldn’t grow to love it as his own, since it wouldn’t truly be a part of his people.

However, what he didn’t take into account was the sight of her beautiful blue eyes and the goodness that radiated from them. At first glance, Arnook knew that he’d do anything to take back his promise—that he’d do anything for his firstborn daughter.

And when she became ill with the sickness that Yue would later contract at birth, he and Homura immediately took her to the spirits—thanking them graciously when the ocean lent its power to extend her lifeline.

Their time as a family was something he’d never forget, but have to learn to live without as their time was up. They didn’t have a sparring moment, not a day left to bask in the glory of being together.

The six years had gone by in a flash, the Fire Nation navy was arriving at dawn, and Y/N and her mother were to be whisked away at once—but at least Y/N was lucky enough to have one final laugh with her sister, making snowmen and dancing under the moonlight.

With her question having remained unanswered, Y/N turned away from her father and sadly left the hall, opening the door to her own bedroom in a hurry to avoid any more of the depressing mood.

She nestled herself beneath her covers, wrapping the blankets around her shivering body. Her mind was restless, insomnia overwhelming her exhaustion and keeping her awake until morning.

Morning which had come far too quickly. Y/N had done her best to ignore the callings and worrying that came from her mother. All she wanted was to run away, to be alone and at peace with her bending wherever she chose to rest.

But Homura had other plans. She needed this transaction to go smoothly, her wish was to make her daughter’s life relieved of the immense stress. She wanted Y/N to be a child without the heinous responsibilities that had been thrust upon her. 

So, as they said their final goodbyes, Homura watched Y/N’s expressions. She watched how her daughter put on a brave face, how she shook her father’s hand rather than giving him a hug.

It was a saddening sight to see. A mere child, a six-year old girl, giving up her entire world to please a man who put his honor over his own family. A man who was letting his flesh and blood enter the lion’s den.

However, in Y/N’s mind this was perfectly normal. She was content with the interaction, considering the love Arnook had once shown her had diminished over the years.

This was their final moment as father and daughter. A moment of silence and respect for the act they were following through with. There was no love in their exchange, but apologies for the future of their bond.

Their bond that would inevitably be broken by the influence and hardships that the Fire Nation would teach Y/N. After all, a child has the most influential brain of any living being.

The minute Y/N and Homura stepped foot on the navy ship, they’d become members of the rivaling nation. Members of the nation that threatened lives and good fortunes. 

But a second before boarding the militant boat, Y/N paused to wave a goodbye to her sister who’d been calling out to her in agony. Yue’s cries could be heard over the crowd’s roar, despair ringing in the breeze.

Y/N’s gaze met Yue’s tear-filled eyes. She pursed her lips into a sad smile, giving her an acknowledging nod, and turned away—disappearing in the vast sea of Fire Nation soldiers.

The heat was indescribable, differing greatly from the cold and sullen air that Y/N was used to. The sun was clear in this part of the world, no clouds or mountains blocking its natural light.

Beams of gold reflected off the towers of the palace and the top of the soldier’s helmets. Everything appeared to be shiny, sparkling, and new in direct relation to the power the nation held.

Not to mention that the only visible color was red. Red tapestries of frightening men, crimson artifacts lining the shelfs, torches filled with waning fire hung from the walls—it was all so intimidating.

Homura was shaking with fear beside her daughter, clinging onto her arm tightly. She hadn’t been to her home country since the talk of her daughter’s conception, choosing to reside in the North rather than face the shame of her deed.

Y/N squeeze her mother’s hand, sensing the nerves that were radiating off of her body like the plague. She looked straight ahead, showing Homura that confidence was the only way to handle the situation.

Despite being the age of six, Y/N had more courage than the average man. She was truly an enigma of her people, of both the Fire Nation and the Northern Water Tribe.

“It’s going to be alright, mother.” The young girl’s face went stoic, all emotion disappearing from her features. Homura would’ve been concerned had it not been for the little finger taps on her palm.

The guards that had been leading them into the palace opened the doors to the grand throne room, leading to the Fire Lord. The mother and daughter pair walked side by side, stepping in synchrony. 

They stopped their strut at the large throne, bowing deeply in respect to their new leader, knowing that his policies were to be far different from those of Arnook’s.

Azulon was seated far above the rest of the room’s inhabitants, that being of a woman and a stern man, a girl around Y/N’s age, and a bearded general who was sitting respectively in the corner.

“Fire Lord Azulon,” Homura’s eyes rose from the floor to Azulon. Her lip quivered in anticipation for whatever it was that he would throw at her. “We are honored to be in your presence.”

The older man laughed maniacally, his placid expression turning into a sneer. Y/N noticed the coldness behind his amber irises and the apathetic look in his steely glare. 

“Homura.” He looked down his nose, disgusted at the sight of her pleading face. “How humbling it must’ve been for you, a Lady of my nation, to become nothing but a mistress for a water tribe savage.”

Y/N’s head shot up in anger as she noticed her mother flinching in retaliation to his comments. She opened her mouth to speak, thankfully being interrupted by sparse giggles coming from the other child in the room.

The waterbender’s eyes narrowed at the girl, noticing how she presented herself. She was obviously important, the vanity that she expressed was evident of itself. Y/N could only assume that she must be the infamous Princess Azula.

While Y/N found frustration in Azula’s amusement, her father, Ozai, was entertained. He seemed to be used to his daughter’s sociopathic tendencies. He waved his hand aimlessly at her, causing her to quickly quiet down.

“Calm now, Azula.” Ozai gestured to the woman sitting next to him, causing her to stand obediently and approach Y/N with ease. “We have some more terms to discuss, without any children present.”

Homura let go of Y/N’s hand, her daughter hanging on as long as she possibly could to show her support and love. She frowned, leaving the throne room, wishing that she could stay and comfort her frightened mother.

However, there was an unspoken comfort in Ursa’s presence. Something that Y/N had failed to feel in all of her brief time in the Fire Nation thus far. It was obvious that Ursa was unlike any of her companions.

They swiftly made their way past the various guards and tapestries in the interior of the palace, entering a sunlit garden filled with a vast array of fire lilies and turtle ducks.

“Come sit, my dear.” Ursa took a seat on the ledge of the fountain, patting the spot next to her. The long sleeves of her robes dipped into the water as she welcomed Y/N with ease.

The waterbender happily obliged, already feeling comfortable with the woman that she could now call a friend—her first friend that she’d made in the Fire Nation.

As she sat, Y/N took Ursa’s hands in hers, noticing the sopping fabric dripping onto her lap. The girl slowly began to separate the water from her soaked clothing, the beads of dew landing in the streaming fountain.

Ursa watched in awe, admiring the natural skill and passion Y/N displayed in her bending. She’d never seen waterbending in person, but she could only assume that it was a beautiful art by the way Y/N was delicately performing it.

“Thank you,” Ursa whispered, the warmth in her heart growing solemn as she realized what would become of Y/N’s skill and purpose. “You have a kind soul, Princess Y/N.”

“But as long as you remain in this palace, the future will not treat you kindly.” Her brows furrowed, sympathizing with the struggles Y/N would come to face. “My husband expects you to be an opponent that matches Azula’s skill.”

The light behind Ursa’s eyes went dull as she recalled all of the horrible and dishonorable things her husband had done throughout their marriage. “I only wish that I could protect you from the pain that he’ll cause.”

Y/N shook her head in retaliation, a hardened look dawning her face. She’d grown up hearing stories about Azulon and his dangerous son. She knew what they were capable of, yet she wasn’t afraid. She couldn’t afford to be afraid.

Her stoney gaze locked with Ursa’s one of sadness. They held their stare for a moment, a mutual understanding spoken between them. A grim smile eventually rose on the woman’s lips, before taking notice of Y/N’s eyes.

On the left laid a beautiful dark blue iris, similar to the depths of the dark ocean and the strength that it represented—and on the right, was a dim white in comparison to the stunning blue. 

The waterbender’s mismatched sight was a direct result from her illness as an infant. A direct result from the borrowed power of the ocean spirit, La, that was still inhabiting her body.

It was infatuating, the allure of Y/N’s eyes was of nothing that she had ever seen before. A spark of hope rose in Ursa from her new knowledge, a belief was born that perhaps this girl could help this world become good again.

Perhaps Y/N could help her own children become good, truly good despite the influence of their father. Azula was already nearing evil, but Zuko—Ursa knew that her son was better than that.

“Mother?” A faint voice rang through the courtyard, startling Ursa and Y/N and causing them to jump apart. The princess’ gaze searched her surroundings for the owner of the voice, landing on a small boy.

He looked to be her age, perhaps a year or so older than her. She knew he had to be Prince Zuko, there was no other explanation to the way he was carrying around a woven basket full of bread like he owned the place.

“I asked the servants if they had any leftovers for the turtle ducks, and they gave me this whole stack!” Zuko exclaimed, the excitement was noticeable in his voice as he watched where he stepped.

He opened his mouth in preparation to express his happiness to his mother, before his eyes met Y/N’s. Zuko froze in place, analyzing the girl and her appearance.

It was well known that the arrival of Lady Homura and her daughter was earlier that morning. Zuko had skipped out on the first meeting, having dreamt up a million other things to do than meet another snobby princess.

But as he saw her for the first time, Zuko felt somewhat of a connection. It was unexplainable in words, the feelings so intricate and immense. There was just something about her that Zuko couldn’t put his finger on.

Y/N herself was having a similar realization at the sight of the prince. Rather than noticing his entire appearance, she settled on the color of his eyes and how different they were to that of his father’s.

The amber in them reflected off of the water in the fountain, shimmering in the sunlight that bounced off of the cherry blossom trees. She could tell that he was the black sheep of the royal family as his eyes held something that no others did—they were kind.

“You must be Princess Y/N.” Zuko calmly said, setting down his basket in front of her and offering her one of the loafs. “I’m Zuko. Would you like to feed the turtle ducks with me?”

Y/N smiled, her first genuine smile in the entirety of her time in the Fire Nation, and nodded, taking it in her palm. She moved aside so he had a seat on the ledge, feeling complete in his presence.

“I’d love to.”

NEXT: CHAPTER ONE [UNEDITED]

TAGS: @irreplaceable-ecstasy​ @justab-eautifulmess​ @whalerus​ @eridanuswave​ @theblueslytherin​ @itsametaphorbriansblog​ @fire-lady-livi​ @royahllty​ @rainedoutdays​ @zukoatethat @winchestergirl907​ @pointlesscoconut​ @mr-robot-x​ @wesokkasimp​ @vernon-dursley​  @sadgirlnumber92899​ @kaylove12​ @bigbuckyenergy​ @appa-gaangnam-style​ @nmriia​ @strawberiicreme​ @sokkassuki​ @fiantomartell​ @firelordhesther​ @user12345321 @lammello​@practicallylivesonline​ @cherryskyies​ @shell-bells-ringding​  @xapham​ @mochminnie​ @bombardia​ @xxspqcebunsxx​ @missmorosis​ @mysticpeacecrusade @akiris​ @simpinforsukka​

[copperpieceharlot]

Bud I’m sorry to swing into your inbox uninvited like this but my soul is having an OOTS renaissance thanks to your content in the tag and did you say Leverage AU

haha holy SHIT this got Long. but yes. i’ve been. Thinking. (also literally Never feel like you have to apologize for sending me messages. i was Hoping someone would ask me about this. now i have an Excuse to share EVERYTHING ive written abt it :3)

Obviously, Roy is the leader/brains of the outfit. He grew up having some Strong Opinions abt what’s Legal versus what’s Right due to tragic backstory involving the death of his little brother which was definitely SOMEONE’S fault for negligence but since there technically wasn’t any illegal behavior, there were no consequences for it. Also he’s still angry at his dad bc he thinks his dad is also partly culpable (and also also just a dick). He’s the Moral Backbone of the team (alongside Durkon, more on that later) in basically the same way Nate was in og Leverage. He’s actually not the best at figuring out what people want (that’s Haley and, shockingly, occasionally Elan), but once he has that info, he is the absolute best at figuring out the ideal plan of attack to use in any given case.

Haley is still a thief. I mean she maps to Parker almost PERFECTLY. Her dad was a thief & a conman, her mom wasn’t but knew about it and mostly accepted it, but she died tragically in a mugging gone wrong or smth, which made Ian crank the paranoia WAY up and taught Haley to do the same in the name of “safety”. Let’s keep the “Ian is in Trouble and Haley needs money, Fast” which is why she signs on to the first job in the first place. She’s less acrobatic than Parker, tending towards finding (or making) weak spots in security, but she can still make a tumble check when she needs to.

Elan is the grifter who is somehow an Idiot but also not???? It baffles everyone. When he’s playing a part for a con, he’s FLAWLESS, but then the rest of the time he’s just. No Thoughts Head Empty. He probably gets lured in initially because he’s decided to try his hand at being part of a full team, rather than the two-man cons he’s been running that invariably end w his partner conning him as well and stealing half of his take. Also he likes the idea of being Crime Friends. He’s that tweet where it’s like, Roy: “after the heist is over, we split up and never communicate again” / Elan: [about to unveil his Crime Buddies Forever Friendship Quilt Puppets]: “never?”

Vaarsuvius is the hacker/gadget person. They have a Vaguely Snobby Yet Unidentifiable accent, dyed(?) purple hair (nobody has ever seen their roots) and nobody knows who they “really” are or where they came from, but they’re good at what they do so everyone just accepts the mystery. They probably got suckered into the team by their initial employer (who I’ll get to Eventually, lol) framing it as a challenge to their intellect, like, “oh, I see, you’re not smart enough to make this team work for you...” to which they were like Fucking Watch Me and also melted his computer. Anyways. They are joined (digitally) by their Intrepid Friend And Co-Conspirator (his words, not theirs), a fellow hacker known only as Blackwing, or, on certain forums, Blackwing_Bird. (In the first season, V only occasionally references him when saying they’re “calling in extra help” or smth for a particularly complex hack job. He starts showing up a little more in s2 and eventually by the start of s4 is a regular & established presence, but only appears as actions in a computer interface or output.) Elan is convinced he’s an AI, Belkar doesn’t think he actually exists, Haley pretends she doesn’t think he exists, and Durkon and Roy try not to think about it too hard, as long as B and V still get the job done.

Belkar is the hitter. He is on the team bc their initial employer got him out of jail for it. He doesn’t have a tragic backstory, he just likes doing violent crimes. As the series progresses, he grows some empathy & stuff, but really only for people who actually deserve it. Assholes still get decked. It’s all very touching. (Also he has dwarfism caused by achondroplasia. It doesn’t actually bother him and is useful in fights bc his opponents frequently have no fucking clue how to approach him, but he likes Pretending to take offense at stupid things just to see how far he can go with it.)

Aaaand last but not least, Durkon is the least involved member of the team. He’s actually a career criminal and Roy’s mentor, and wasn’t a member of the initial team that [redacted, I’ll tell you later, PROMISE] put together for a couple of reasons, the main one being that he’s Officially retired in order to spend more time with his family, which consists of his mom, his friend (not girlfriend) Hilgya, baby Kudzu, and a truly stunning number of aunts, uncles, and cousins. Roy frequently calls or visits him for advice and he Occasionally shows up to help out on local jobs, but generally he avoids doing crime if he can (as part of a deal with Hilgya, who is also a career criminal; basically, they’ve both cut back on the crime in order to provide a more stable home environment for Kudzu. But sometimes, you gotta do a little crime, and in those cases, Sigdi enjoys spending time w her grandson.)

NOW. THE BIG REVEAL YOU’VE BEEN WAITING FOR. Who got the team together in the first place?!

The answer: Lord Shojo (or whatever Normal Person Name you want to assign him). Now this is where it gets tricky: he had them do a thing that they thought was good, THEN they thought it was BAD, but then when they confronted him he revealed that it Appearing to be bad was actually a test of character and would they consider working as basically internal investigators for him? But then he had a heart attack, so, rip. But THEN it turned out that he’d left them a bunch of money anyway and they were all feeling kind of Inspired so they formed the Order of the Stick, LLC (which, no, i am not coming up with a new name, actually, because I just don’t care. someone else can come up w a justification for that name, tho, i’m sure it’s possible). Also Miko was there and was unhappy abt their actions, and also their general existence.

Moving on. Villains!

Redcloak is the Sterling replacement, because that DEEPLY amuses me.

Xykon is a season-long main villain, probably one that Redcloak finds himself working for but then “teams up with” (read: blackmails) the Order to bring him down bc even Redcloak finds Xykon distasteful. That’s season 3, let’s say.

Tarquin is another season villain, say season 2. Nale probably shows up pretty early in s1, actually, as another recurring antagonist like Sterling but uh. Less good at it. Anyways the s2 final 3 eps deal with them (accidentally) discovering that Tarquin runs some Evil Empire Company, then trying to outplay him and take him down. Idk if Nale still dies in this version tbh.

Tsukiko is a one-off s1 villain who returns briefly in s4 alongside Miko, who has gone well and truly off the rails.

Season 1 finale has to do w Roy finally getting Vengeance for his little brother.

The vampire squad is the s4 finale villain who do smth terrible to Durkon and then get the Mother Of All Revenge served up to them by the Order.

I envision the show as being 5 seasons (like og Leverage) but I’m not going to sketch out s5 because I think it should be based off whatever happens in the current story arc, possibly involving some legacy of the OotSquiggle.

Other stuff!

The Order of the Squiggle is a legendary criminal team from the 60s who stole a BUNCH of famous shit & then proceeded to legendarily implode. This has no bearing on the plot I’ve sketched out, I just think it’s fun.

The Sapphire Guard members should probably be reworked as FBI. I don’t care about most of them but I do think that Lien and O-Chul could be like, FBI agents who Choose to look the other way while the Order does their very-much-not-legal-but-still-fair Justice Crime, and maybe even help them out on occasion.

So, the Final season-by-season outline, based on everything I’ve written so far:

s1 e1: getting the team together, doing a con for Shojo, then at the end he dies and the gang is like “dang what now?" and intend to split up except then they Don’t.

mid-s1: Nale shows up and tries to trick the Order, but then gets beat like a drum.

late s1: Tsukiko is an underling of the Villain Of The Week, winds up in police custody. But She’ll Be Back.

s1 finale: Roy’s Vengeance: The Vengeaning. also we meet Redcloak as an antagonist.

s2 e1: the truth abt Haley’s father comes out

early s2: The Two Live Crews Job but it’s the Order vs the Linear Guild and the Linear Guild ARE all bad guys.

mid-s2: Redcloak returns. ugh.

late s2: the sapphire guard FBI makes its first appearance, hello O-Chul and Lien.

s2 pre-finale: once again they’re in conflict w Nale over smth, he spends the whole episodes making Cryptic Remarks, they basically beat him (like a drum!) but then the stinger at the end is that Tarquin reveals himself and Elan is like “Dad?!”, roll credits.

s2 finale, part 1: Elan is hanging out w Tarquin bc he’s DEEP in Denial, the Rest of the team tries to take Tarquin down, but it doesn’t work.

s2 finale, part 2: Elan finally gets a clue and they manage to beat Tarquin. still haven’t decided if Nale dies or not, but I’m leaning towards yes. also they rescue Haley’s dad.

s3 e1: fuck dude idk.

early s3: Redcloak shows up, AGAIN, everyone groans. he has blackmail on them, he wants them to take Xykon down.

mid s3: The Rashomon Job but it’s about stealing the Talisman of Dorukan and it turns out that Nale was there too (“oh!” Elan says. “I was wondering why I looked so weird in all those mirrors! But it wasn’t my reflection, it was Nale’s!” “Sweetie, that wasn’t Nale’s reflection,” says Haley. “Huh,” says Elan, “so the mirrors were broken?”, cue eye rolling from everyone else.), and the Successful thief was Hilgya, who’d nabbed it from the owner before it even went on display.

s3 finale: they beat Xykon, actually factually, because he deserves to get his ass Thoroughly kicked, even if only in AU form. Lien and O-Chul are there, so are some other less helpful FBI people. There’s a bit where O-Chul Exact Wordses his way out of telling his superiors about the Order’s less legal activities without technically lying. King shit.

s4 e1: doesn’t really matter. maybe smth to do w some legacy of Tarquin’s company to set up the drama w Malack & Durkon later.

early s4: Durkon gets SENT TO PRISON. Malack approaches the Order abt this because sure they have Different Ethics but they’re still Friends. (Roy is surprised and a little hurt that he’s never heard of Malack, but he ignores that in favor of Let’s Get Whatever Fuckers Did This To Our Friend.)

immediately after that: Miko and Tsukiko return as a Team, preventing the Order from working on the Durkon situation

mid s4: Redcloak makes another unexpected & unwelcome appearance but he’s maybe a little less of a dick? the Order collaborates with Malack & his Crime Buddies (hello, Vector Legion) to pull one over on him tho, because “less of a dick” does not mean “a pleasant or decent person”, and also he was mean abt Durkon being in jail, so he totally deserved it. he still gets whatever he wanted tho, just takes a blow to his pride. also prevents the Order from helping Durkon. they’re having a LOT of setbacks wonder why that could be, not to make sure the season fills its whole length or anything, no sirree

s4 finale: something something taking down the organization, headed by Hel (yes that’s her real name), which framed Durkon for their Big Crime. Durkon goes free and Extra Firmly retires, For Good, He Swears, but says he “met someone new” who might be an asset.

s5 e1: minrah joins the team! and the episode is set in like, somewhere really snowy. that’s all i got.

the rest of s5: don’t know, don’t care, it’s open-ended until the comic finishes up.

[overthinkinglotr]

Can I just ask what...is the contest for the Boorman adaptation? I mean... This is not a normal movie script, right?

YAY OBSCURE LOTR ADAPTATIONS TALK TIME!!! (We’re talking about the context of John Boorman’s LOTR, the one where Frodo has sex with Galadriel)

OK SO

Yes, John Boorman’s screenplay is so completely baffling and incoherent that it seems like it can’t possibly be real. I really don’t know for sure if the draft that’s floating around the internet is really the Real Thing. However-- the weirdest aspects of that screenplay seem to be corroborated by other sources?

Some sources say the screenplay exists in physical form at Marquette University, but idk if that’s the version that’s online. Maybe it is!

And I’ve come across multiple sources discussing the scene where Gimli gets beaten up and buried alive to “unlock his magic ancestral memories,” the infamous poorly written Frodo/Galadriel sex scene, etc.

But again! I personally don’t know how reliable all these sources are. A lot of the old Reliable Sources discussing the screenplay have kinda just Vanished off the internet, and finding Definitive Confirmation would take some digging. That someone else can do, because I’m not good at this. :P

But I’ll throw information at you and you can decide what’s real--

Here’s what I DO know for certain is true:

In the 1970s, John Boorman approached United Artists with a pitch for a movie based on Arthurian legends (which would later become the film Excalibur.) UA turned him down, thinking Arthurian legends weren’t marketable enough.

They instead commissioned him to write a screenplay for a live-action film adaptation of Lord of the Rings.They were kinda like “Lord of the Rings, Arthurian legends....same thing, they both have a wizard and a medieval sword guy in it. But Lotr is popular right now, so well have this guy write a tolkien thing. Someone who likes arthur legends will also be good at writing lord of the rings, because they’re basically the same.”

(But like...they’re not, obviously. King Arthur legends are a bunch of folklore that doesn’t have one single ‘plot.” Writing a King Arthur film means using a few characters and some famous imagery and throwing them in a medieval setting to vibe together, creating the film’s plot by cherry-picking the Arthur stories you like most and throwing them together in a blender. But Lord of the Rings isn’t like that! It isn’t a collection of folkloric stories with no clear plot! Lord of the Rings is ultimately a single story with a single coherent plot! Someone who wants to adapt their own take on something as plotless as  folklore might really Struggle to adapt a plot-heavy book like LOTR!)

So anyway, John Boorman wrote this screenplay for them.

But John Boorman’s movie was never made.

Why was it never made?

Here’s where we get into some SUPER FUN “unreliable narrator” territory!!!!

John Boorman’s claim:

According to John Boorman in his biography, the film was never made because UA was tight on money and the special effects required were simply too expensive for the 1970s.

Boorman really did try very hard to make his screenplay good! According to Boorman, he and his writing partner Rospo Pallenberg  “covered all the walls of a room with a breakdown of all the scenes in all three volumes,” “drew a map of middle earth,” “wrote detailed analyses of all the characters,” and spent several weeks devising a structure for the film. Then they wrote the script together-- Boorman wrote one scene, Pallenberg the next.

But alas, it was too expensive to film in live-action. The technology just wasn’t there yet.

So the studio was forced to have the film made by an animator, Ralph Bakshi.

Boorman says that Tolkien wrote a letter to him saying that he approved of his screenplay (which Tolkien hadn’t read) solely because it was going to be a live-action movie. Tolkien hated animation. Boorman says that Tolkien’s death “spared him” the horrible pain of seeing his story adapted into animation. According to Boorman the problem with the Bakshi film (which he never saw) was that it was animated, and therefore inherently bad. Unlike Boorman’s script, which was an amazing work of art that would’ve been a wonderful live-action (and therefore inherently superior) movie!!! If only it was made! Boorman mentions that the working conditions on the Bakshi film were horrible (because they were) and laments that budget constraints meant the studio was forced to sell the movie to a low-down NO GOOD “ANIMATOR!” >:((((

BUT

Ralph Bakshi, obviously, tells a very different story!

Ralph Bakshi’s Claim:

According to Bakshi, John Boorman’s screenplay was so UTTERLY incoherent that it was unusable. UA gave Bakshi the rights to make a film because they had paid a million dollars for a trash script, and now they were dealing with the Sunk Cost Fallacy(tm). Bakshi was allowed to make his film because UA had wasted so much money on Boorman that they were desperate for ANYONE to use the Lord of the Rings IP in a way that wasn’t completely incoherent and could make sOME money:

“I thought, ‘Wait a minute, why don’t I go make the film?’ recalls Bakshi. “So I call up Mike Medavoy and I go to United Artists, which in those days were on the same lot as MGM. In the main building on one side of the building was MGM — which Dan Melnick ran in those days — and on the other side was Mike Medavoy at UA. I went to see Mike in his office and he says,

“Look, I’ve got this (John Boorman) script and I don’t understand it. I never read the book. We don’t want to make the picture. What do you want to do?’ I said, ‘I want to animate it. Three pictures.’

He said, ‘We don’t want the picture. What we want is our three million dollars back for the screenplay that we paid Boorman. So I’ll give you the rights, and if you can get our money back you can make the picture any way you want.’ True story.”

So it is a fun game of, which director of a failed unfinished LOTR project do you believe?

John Boorman later reused a lot of his Lord of the Rings script ideas for his film Excalibur. I haven’t seen the full thing, but the film kinda feels like proto-Game of Thrones? I feel like it adds credence to the idea that the bad screenplay was real-- a lot of the weird way Boorman writes women/gender in Excalibur is reflected in the parodically awful FrodoXGaladriel Fanfic Stuff.

Plus, I’ve seen the Andrew Davies BBC adaptation of Les Miserables! And ithat adaptation is so terrible that I can believe that the nonsense in the Boorman screenplay, like FrodoxGaladriel, can seem perfectly reasonable if you approach it from the perspective of a mediocre middle-aged male writer. :/ Anyway! But my BBC Les Mis Salt isn’t really relevant here! :D

But yeah! That’s some context I have on hand. The exciting fun story of the Lotr movie that was never made! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

[lexsssu]

Shall We Date: Worship Me AU - Gabriel (Avatar of Diligence)

What if the MC gets transported to the Celestial Realm instead? What if the angels were the love interests?

GENERAL HCs

Known as the “Voice of God” and as such, is Big G’s primary messenger to the human world and the devildom

Because of this, he’s pretty well-known in the 3 worlds and knows a heck lot of different people

Also has a beautiful voice, the kind you’d want to listen to in an ASMR, podcast, audiobook, etc.

Then again do you really expect God’s voice to have anything other than a beautiful voice?

Like seriously his voice sounds like warm melted dark chocolate

He’s also Uriel’s younger twin brother

While Uriel is more akin to the cool and comforting countenance of the moon, Gabriel has the blazing warmth of the sun

Perpetually smiling, but each smile holds different meanings depending on how big it is, if there was any crookedness to it, if he showed his teeth, etc.

His close friends and family can usually tell which smile is which, but it’s his twin that can ALWAYS tell whatever mood he was in even just from analyzing his smile

Most of the time however, that smile hides a rambunctious imp that particularly likes playing tricks on anyone and everyone

He enjoys freaking people out and relishes the reactions they make. The more exaggerated the reaction, the better

That time Big G talked to Moses by going into that burning bush? It was Gabriel’s bright idea

Seriously though, that memory of him freaking out is one of Gabriel’s most treasured moments

Although truth be told, his all-time favorite reactions are the ones he least expected

One of his favorite pastimes is trying to coax a surprised reaction out of Uriel, seeing as his brother was normally so stone-faced

He feels that it’s his divine mission to get as many reactions out of Uriel as he can

He enjoys tormenting Raphael as much as he enjoys mentoring their youngest brother on how to speak effectively

A master of the art of speaking, so he knows every manner of using one's voice no matter what their intended outcomes were

Whether it's to soothe, anger, or seduce someone, Gabriel knows them all

But he asks a price for his services. You have to call him "Big Brother" sweetly if you want to even remotely get his attention for whatever favor you plan on asking him

Gabriel enjoys teasing others aside from pranking them

The flustered reactions he gets is always a nice treat

Don’t get him wrong though, he enjoys messing with others but it’s all light-hearted fun on his end and is never done with any intended malice

Rather, he actually makes sure that he never touches upon sore spots for anyone

He’s just a prankster, not an asshole

Out of the seven virtues, he also the one who still gets in touch the most with Lucifer and his brothers

He is a messenger after all so it’s a given he sends and receives messages the most

With how many prophecies, signs, and dreams he has to deliver Gabriel is almost always out and about. So he’s actually the one who’s least present in the celestial realm

You’d usually catch him on the rare times where he’s on break or in-between deliveries

Sometimes when he’s in need of a little entertainment during assignments, he’d spice up his deliveries by changing the method of delivering the messages

Like perhaps he was supposed to give a human a sign from Big G through a dream, but that’s so old-school so instead he delivers it when they’re wide awake and by themselves

He can’t possibly pinpoint the fact why some humans went to loony bins after he delivered their messages

P.S. They thought they went mad because of those “divine hallucinations”

A chaotic force of nature in all his white-haired, molten chocolate goodness

Emphasis on CHAOTIC

Like the rest of his brothers, he enjoys spoiling Azrael in the way normal big brothers spoil their younger siblings

Obligatory noogies, random wrestling moves, cheek pinching, etc.

An advocate of "No one can bully my siblings except me"

Frequently gets souvenirs from wherever he'd last gone to. He doesn't just get souvenirs for him though, he also gets some for his brothers

Limited edition keychains for Michael for example, sweets for Azrael, local ingredients for Cainabel, tea leaves for Raphael, a new book for Uriel, and etc.

For some reason people like giving him random stuff. Like he could just be passing by and one of his acquaintances or even someone who he'd never really hung out with but knew of him had just harvested their mango tree and now and a surplus of them, or ordered a bit too much of this or that and would give him their extras instead

That's why his pockets are perpetually full with little snacks, candies, and all a manner of random stuff

When his pockets get too full he pops up in the other virtues' offices to lighten his load so to speak

More often than not, it's Azrael who benefits from his brother's popularity since Gabriel himself doesn't eat too many sweets

He doesn't actually notice just how good-looking he is and couple that with his beautiful voice, you can see how and why he's so popular

His generally sunny and rambunctious personality has also earned him many fans

A fan of collecting stamps and has hundreds upon hundreds of books which contain every stamp that has ever come into existence

Stationery otaku

Michael once gave him a pen, one of those cheap ones you get at dollar stores with a cute character at the top. He still uses it until today and never leaves home without it

Regardless of how tacky something is, if it's from his brothers then Gabriel is sure to use it with happiness and pride

ENG VA: Vic Mignogna

JP VA: Mamoru Miyano

ROMANTIC HCs

He’s already a normally friendly and handsy type of guy so it’s kinda hard to notice if he’s actually romantically interested in you

Heck, even Gabe doesn’t realize that he’s into you for a good while because he believes the way he thinks about and reacts to you was still included in the realm of being platonic friends

So what if his heart does those little flips whenever you laugh good-naturedly at his antics? When you gave him that little smile of yours that he liked to think was reserved solely for him?

It’s probably nothing when his skin heats up a little bit whenever his skin touches yours even for a little bit

What do you mean he’s always hanging around you? You were his best friend so of course he’d almost always be with you!

He’s kind of like a bird in the sense that his attention span is always moving from one thing or another, but the fact that you manage to hold his attention for so long even when you’re not there was something that surprised and baffled his brothers

Most notably Uriel who was used to Gabriel flitting about, kind of like a hummingbird if he was being honest

Also like a bird, Gabriel gets a lot of random trinkets. Both of his own accord and because people just like randomly giving him stuff and if he deems any of them worthy enough for you, he’s sure as heck gonna present it and gift it to you as soon as possible

He practically preens whenever you accept his gifts (it doesn’t help that his wings sometimes pop out in all his happiness and excitement). Even just a little compliment gets him so happy and excited for the rest of the day

Offers you his wing to touch if you show even the slightest interest in their angel wings

“ You wanna touch them? They’re 100% guaranteed SUPER SOFT. I always keep my wings nice and tidy since I gotta keep up appearances as a messenger, ‘ya know? ”

Gabe doesn’t realize/forgets that to offer someone to touch the symbols of his power, his wings of all things, showed that he held you in high regard

It confirmed your purity of soul, because to be judged by an archangel, a Virtue even meant that you were a special type of soul, a diamond in the rough so to speak

Although Gabe himself doesn’t notice it, his brothers definitely notice his sudden fixation on you. It’s almost worrying seeing him sitting still for once

While most people would think Gabe would be as chill as he normally he is when facing the truth of his feelings...he isn’t

Many forget that he and Uriel are twins, born of the same core split into two by the Heavenly Father. They shared much more characteristics than just their looks

Once he’s enamored by something, this angel shows his almost infallible dedication to it and only God sits above it

Like Uriel, he does his best to observe and learn everything about you, but what’s scarier is that he does it so covertly that you don’t even know he’s fishing for information all the while relishing his time with you

It doesn’t help that as the Voice of God, his charms are nigh impossible to resist or even detect so you sometimes don’t even realize that he’s playing you right into the palm of his hands

Oh but you don’t have to worry though, Gabriel loves you with all his heart and only wishes to court you properly and perfectly. That’s another of the traits that he shares with his twin

You’ll never have to worry about him coaxing you into something you won’t like or is bad for you. He merely aims to show you the true extent of his pure love

Dates with him are always at different locations or generally something new, because there’s so much that he wants to show and experience together with you

Karaoke dates are a fan favorite between you two, because who DOESN’T wanna hear the Voice of God himself sing?

Like his voice is already like pouring warm melted dark chocolate to your ears but his voice is enough to send you floating happily into the Celestial Realm

“ So where should we go to next? ...Karaoke again? Do you really love hearing me sing that much, cutie? You know I can sing for you as much as you want. I’m all yours~ ”

[misssakurapetal28]

9 Reasons Why People Might (and CAN) Ship Apritello in Rise!

1). It kind of follows the "childhood friends to lovers" trope. Usually from all the anime (and occasionally cartoons and other types of media) that I've watched, there's a "friends to lovers" trope and/or "childhood friends to lovers" trope. It's usually when...welll...when friends start to feel romantic feelings towards each other, become a couple or start to date. Usually when that's the case, the friends usually have good interactions or/and know each other more personally than anyone else does. Usually those main things are enough to make a relationship. 2). Even if they do start dating, I don't think things will change THAT much. Maybe some sweet and cute couple moments every now and then, but besides that, does Donnie and April HAVE to be lovey-dovey like every couple media tends to portray pairings these days? Donnie and April can just watch Netflix and chill. Have fun and hang out like they normally do? I see them as just teens who do what they want and don't follow couple clichés. They might date or be a couple, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t still friends.  3). Interspecies relationships have happened before in shows. Though I haven't personally watched shows that did have interspecies relationships, I know they exist. So why Rise should be an exception? And NO. Apritello is NOT bestiality. In 2012, April is half-muntant/kraang and there’s a possibly that Donnie MIGHT have human DNA too from Splinter. In Rise, Donnie does have human DNA inside him from Splinter. 

And EVEN IF one or both of them weren’t half mutant/human, it STILL isn’t bestiality. Bestiality is when a human is in a relationship with an animal basically (just look up the real definition if you want to know). Donnie is a mutant turtle (a mutant with human DNA in Rise). He also has a consenting mind. So at best, it’s a interspecies relationship. Now if you personally still don’t like the pair because you personally don’t like interspecies relationships neither, then that’s your preference and I respect that. However, I still think interspecies is LEAUGES better than bestiality in my opinion.  4). Their adorable babies and they generally look cute together. Nuff said ^^ Donnie and April reminds me of the famous "opposites attract" trope too. April, the feisty, headstrong tomboy with the cleaver, sass master Donnie is just interesting dynamic to me. Their personalities compliment each other. Their flaws and virtues compliment each other. I just belive they work well together. Also, angst possibilities. LOTS of angst possibilities. Just saying...

5).  Most Apritello (or April x Turtles) haters/T///cest shippers are total shallow hypocrites. Like I’ve mentioned before, It really baffles me and annoys me that TMNT fans look down on others for shipping Apritello (or any other April x Turtles pairing) just because they personally see (or always saw) April being a big sister to the guys when the same kind of people are perfectly fine with shipping T///cest, pairings that involve the turtles together. At least people who don’t ship neither have the excuse that they see all the teens as siblings and it’s wrong to see them as anything else, but AT LEAST April and the turtles aren’t REALLY related. Like I said, sometimes people who grew up together/childhood friends DO and CAN get together.

Now...People who ship t///cest...that’s THEIR business (I personally despise it). They can stay in their corner and I can stay in mine. Heck, people even have the right to dislike Apritello from any incarnation (especially by 2012 Apritello’s track record), but don’t you dare criticize or looked down on others who do like it when t///cest in that logic isn’t that much better. Now, I personally like 2012 Apritello (or at least mostly the fandom version of it) and I honestly take some interest in the Rise version of it too (however, this one has less attention and love), but if someone else just personally doesn’t like it, that’s perfectly fine too. However, the point that I’m making is that I wish that people don’t be so shallow when it comes to the very little people who does ship Apritello in this incarnation. People liking Apritello isn’t a bad thing. It’s just the way it has to be handled. 

BTW: I can also get people disliking Apritello in the 80’s series and the 2003 series because April was in her 20’s, but in the 2012 and 2018/Rise series she isn’t! She’s 16. 

6). You can ship what the hell you want. 

I know Rise! Apritello mostly comes from that fact that it was a thing in 2012, but so? People still have the right to ship it. Also, it seems like they have at least some kind of development or chemistry. Now, I’m not going to lie. The chances of them being a couple or even having ANY KIND of romantic feelings in this series is slim because:

1. It’s a kids show. It’s more of a silly/comedy kid show than any of the other previous TMNT incarnations ever were. So this incarnation of TMNT might not be suitable for actaul romantic themes. I mean, there’s the “romantic”/complicated relationship between Splinter and Big Mama, but that’s about it.

2. Again, it’s a kids show....about kids and their (mis)adventures. April is 16 and Donnie is 14. I doubt that romance is a big thing for them right now at this point in their lives. Not to say crushes can’t happen, but...yeah.

3. April most likely sees Donnie as a brother and vise versa. In fact, it WAS confirmed that April sees all the turtles that way. Also, most Rise fans sees them as such, even before Rise began.

4. I know some don’t find a problem with this (including myself), but Donnie is a mutant turtle while April is a human girl. So people might find that weird or claim it is bestiality (even though it’s not). Hence part of the reason why I think one of the creators/writers said this. Speaking of...

5. Seems like they don’t ship it romantically. Heck, they even claim that others (or 2012 Donnie’s crush on April, it’s really unclear) as “pervy” for it (which I disagree, but I digress). 

HOWEVER, despite all this said, who’s to say that anyone still CAN’T ship it? HECK, who even says that the possibility is COMPETELY off the table? You see that I said the possibility of them happening or having any romantic feelings for each other are SLIM, not INPOSSIBLE. Like I said above, I’m one of the those people who watched TMNT 2012 who actaully shipped Apritello. 

Now, I’m not going to sit up here and say that Donnie’s crush (and in my opinion, later love) for April was the healthiest thing in the world. I’m also not going to say that Donnie and April’s characters where the best here. Because it wasn’t, it was a result of bad writting from the writers part. But...Apritello in TMNT 2012 in canon wasn’t that bad sometimes per say. I personally love Apritello for what it could’ve been more than anything, but canon Apritello? It wasn’t THAT bad. Again, it was just how it was written. If it was given more of proper writting, I really think Apritello could of been like, one of the most amazing and complex ships in media history??? But Alas...

However, unlike 2012 Apritello (unfortunately), I do think Rise “Apritello” is being handled A LOT better, healthier and more natural this time around. Even if it’s not the creators/writers intentions this time around to make any kind of romance for the two, they still have great development together, but I belive that they are close. Now, in MY personal headcanons, I headcanon that Donnie didn’t initially romantically like April from the start. I even made a headcanon that when they first met, they disliked each other (but that’s a different story for maybe another day). So things basically just went the same as it is in canon. 

However, ever since the snow day episode (which I kind of headcanon in a scene that wasn’t shown like this), Donnie gain a tiny crush on her (which grew little by little). Now by NO MEANS that it’s as big and crazy as 2012 Donnie’s crush, but a crush no less. Now, do or will they get together in my headcanon? Well, I don’t know yet. Because my feelings for this pair tend to go back and forth. 

The point is, people ARE allowed to ship Apritello if they want to. People shouldn’t have to feel hesitant or bad to ship them just because others see them as siblings (which again, they are not even related) or because people don’t personally like it or see it as right. I also don’t feel like people have to stop shipping it just because of the common headcanon that April is a Lesbian. 

And that’s another thing. Look, I have NOTHING against the popular headcanon of April being a lesbian (and I also understand why people would think that). That’s cool. You can have ANY KIND of headcanon for ANY character you want. However, in my personal headcanons, I see April as Bi (but maybe a little more interested in girls). It’s not only because I ship her with Donnie though, but it’s because it’s never been confirmed that she’s not interested in guys too though. 

Just because she’s bit of a tomboy and has no interested in Dale (a character that BARLEY made ANY appearances and the fandom seems to already hate him for SOME REASON), that doesn’t automatically mean that she’s ONLY into girls. I mean, you can headcanon ANYONE the way that you want, but her being Bi is MY opinion and MY headcanon.

My point: Ship what you want and don’t give dam what ANYONE says, even if it is Apritello.

7). They make a pretty good duo. Shown in episodes like “The Purple Jacket” and “Donnie v.s. Witch Town”, the two make a prefect duo! They also seem to have a better understanding of each other and care about one another a lot. They love each other and kick butt together! ^^ 8). This is my personal taste, but they are like the sun and moon :) This also plays into my “opposites attract” theory when it comes to them. Also, read more up about the concept of “yin and yang”. It will make A LOT of sense when it comes to these two!  9). It can work out platonically AND romantically. Like I’ve mentioned above, it means they are dating/are in a relationship, that doesn’t mean that they can’t also be friends. However, that doesn’t mean they won’t work out just as good as friends. That’s just how much understanding that they have for each other and how good they work out together :) 

---

Wow, I wrote a lot! lol If I took any of this all out of context, I’m sorry for that? lol But I just wanted to make the point that shipping Apritello in this incarnation isn’t bad like some people make it out be. It’s just as fun as shipping any of the other popular pairs in in this incarnation. I like Apritello, both 2012 and Rise. If you do too, then you should be allowed to without feeling bad about it. Just remember that! 

Let’s enjoy these two dorks together, ok? :)

[lloydskywalkers]

There’s Insurance for That

In which Skylor buys lunch, stops a criminal, and learns the best way to blow up the kitchen electronics section, which is a pretty normal week for her, she guesses. Or, five places the ninja are no longer allowed into, featuring Skylor.

(been hitting a bit of a writer’s block with everything else lately, so here’s this...disaster, i guess?? because these ninja are definitely a disaster in this, but i was having fun so. this is the bed bath & beyond fic btw, in case anyone was wondering gdfkgdh)

1. My. Kazami’s Ramen Place

At this point, sadly, Skylor’s used to it.

It’s around a quarter to noon on a Monday, just as she's leaving the noodle shop for her well-deserved lunch break, when a familiar scream splits the relatively-quiet afternoon air on this side of Ninjago City.

The only reason Skylor does not immediately dissolve into panic at said scream is because she is — also sadly — familiar with the variations of it, and this one sounds less like it’s Lloyd’s “I’m-in-terrible-danger-and/or-pain-again” scream, and more like his “I’m-free-falling-on-purpose-from-the-sky-again” scream. Which is, in and of itself, not entirely concerning. In fact, it’d probably be more unusual not to see Lloyd go falling from the sky at some point during any of the ninjas’ higher-than-eight-feet battles, because somehow that’s become a habitual thing. The sky is blue, fire is hot, Kai uses hair gel — Lloyd is going to drop screaming from the sky at some point this month.

So instead of panicking, Skylor figures she’ll just stand in the vicinity until Lloyd either climbs out of another dumpster, or lands on top of her. Kai doesn’t seem to be around to catch him, so Skylor’s prepared to step up, even though it looks like Lloyd’s got a pretty good handle on landing, at the angle she’s watching him from.

Still though, she muses. You’d think he’d have started actively wearing a parachute at this point.

“Kai suggested that,” Lloyd says, after he’s finally able to stand straight, and he’s not quite as cross-eyed. He frowns at his reflection in a store window as they pass by, scuffing at his windblown hair again. “But it gets in the way, you know? It throws off my backflips.”

“That’s a nail in the coffin right there,” Skylor agrees, leading them across another sidewalk. Lloyd’s attracting a lot of looks, with his bright green battle gi and razor-sharp sword strapped across his back, but fortunately no one’s started crowding them yet. Probably because the razor-sharp sword strapped to his back. “Can’t have your fighting style completely crippled,” she adds.

“I don’t backflip that much,” Lloyd huffs. Yes, you do, is on the tip of Skylor’s tongue, because she’s seen him fight, but she decides not to pick that battle…this time.

“Besides,” Lloyd continues. “I don’t really need a parachute, anyways. I always make sure to aim for like, somewhere safe to land. Relatively safe. Safe-ish.”

Skylor eyes him. “You landed in a dumpster.”

Lloyd bristles in offense. “I did not! It was a perfectly respectable recycling bin.”

“Same thing, if you ask me.”

“Not even close. Dumpsters are gross. Recycling bins you just crash through a whole bunch of cardboard and old newspapers. It’s luxury trash diving.”

Skylor just sighs, shaking her head, and edits the text she’s been tapping out for Kai.

Skylor > found your kid in a recycling bin

Skylor > taking him to lunch bc you’re clearly starving him again

Skylor > he’s alive btw

Kai > oh thank fsm

Kai > tell him he’s grounded

Kai > u never take me for lunch :(

Skylor > maybe if u dropped on me from the sky sometime i would

“Hey, are the others busy?” she asks Lloyd in afterthought. “Like…fighting anyone?”

“Huh?” Lloyd blinks. He then flushes, rubbing the back of his head. “Ah, no. We’d pretty much finished up the fight when I, uh…there was a break-in, on the Bounty? We had the guys all taken care of, but they blew part of the mast up, and it left debris all over the deck, so I kind of…maybe….tripped…”

Lloyd is bright red by the time he finishes the sentence. Skylor wouldn’t feel so bad about it, if she wasn’t doubled over laughing at him in the middle of rush hour traffic.

“You are a trained ninja,” she breathes out, between snickers.

“I know,” Lloyd moans.

“You’re like, part god.”

“I know,” Lloyd moans again, into his hands this time. Skylor has to grab his shoulders and forcibly drag him along down the crowded street, trying not to cringe inside at all the looks they’re getting.

“Kai says you’re grounded, by the way,” she says, as the last of her laughter fades.

That snaps Lloyd out of it. “He can’t ground me,” he scowls. “I’m leader.”

“Stop falling from the sky, and maybe he’ll give it a rest,” Skylor replies, glancing down as her phone buzzes again.

Kai > I’d join u but I’m stuck on prison delivery

Kai > nya’s coming to pick up the demon spawn tho

Skylor > nice I’ve been wanting to buy her lunch

Kai > cruel

“—don’t know what you mean, I don’t fall that often, and most of the time it’s on purpose, anyways—”

Skylor chooses to ignore Lloyd’s slightly-concerning, sulking rambling, and pats his shoulder instead. “Nya’s coming for lunch, too,” she says. “Does ramen sound good?”

“Oh, yeah.” Lloyd brightens, seemingly cheered by the reminder he’s getting food out of this. “It’s been a while since I’ve eaten out.”

“I can tell,” Skylor says, eyeing him. “Cole hasn’t been cooking for you, has he?"

“No, but we put Zane on mandatory break so he could relax a bit, and we’re all suffering for it.”

Lloyd and Skylor both jump at Nya’s voice, not having heard her coming up behind them.

“Nya!” Lloyd beams. “Skylor is — ouch, hey, let go!”

“That’s what you get for giving me gray hairs again,” Nya scolds, digging her knuckles into Lloyd’s hair. She looks up from the hold she’s pulled him into, and smiles brightly at Skylor. “Hi, Skylor. Nice to see you.”

“Hi, Nya.” Skylor gives a little wave, watching Lloyd squirm out of Nya’s grasp in amusement.

“So, ramen?” Nya says, giving Lloyd one last elbow in the side before joining Skylor.

“Yeah,” she says. “I was thinking the place down on seventh, the Sobahouse, I think?”

Lloyd and Nya both stiffen, their steps slowing. Skylor pauses, turning to stare at them in confusion. “That’s not the one owned by someone named Mr. Kazami, is it?” Nya finally asks, hesitantly.

“Uh, yeah, it is, actually,” Skylor blinks. “He’s pretty nice, we go to the same grocer on weekends.”

“Ah,” Lloyd says, carefully.

“Hm,” Nya hesitates.

Skylor looks between the two of them, now completely stopped in the middle of the sidewalk.  She really hopes no one is getting pictures of her like this. There are enough flash articles about the rumored orange ninja cryptid on the internet as it is. “Is that…a problem?”

Nya pointedly stares at the sky as if it’s the most interesting thing she’s seen all day. Baffled, Skylor tries the weaker link. Lloyd swallows, avoiding her eyes as he bounces from leg to leg, as if the mere thought of trying to enter the restaurant is terrifying. Which is mildly alarming, because this is the same kid who power-walked straight into a prison full of escaped violent criminals, his psychotic ex, and his undead murderous dad without hesitation.

“We can’t,” Lloyd finally mutters, staring at the sidewalk. Nya elbows him in the side, hissing “weak link” as she does. Lloyd just glares at her.

“O-okay,” Skylor says, unsure. “I mean, that’s fine if you guys want to go somewhere else. I just didn’t know you…didn’t like this place…”

“No, we do,” Lloyd grinds out, and he looks more embarrassed than terrified now, so Skylor aborts her half-formed plans of speed-dialing Karloff. “We just can’t. Go in, that is. We’re not allowed to.”

Skylor stares at him. “You’re not allowed in? Why not?”

“Because,” Nya forces through gritted teeth. “They banned us.”

“They what?” Skylor gapes.

Nya presses her lips together tightly. Lloyd stares very hard at the ground, as if desperately trying to convince himself to keep quiet. Skylor can pinpoint the moment he breaks, his expression contorting as he throws his hands up wildly. “You blow their electrical system up one time—”

“Oh guys, no,” Skylor groans, before bursting into laughter at him for the second time that day. Lloyd looks incredibly unappreciative, his expression scrunching up in annoyance like she hasn’t seen since that one stupid skating match with Chamille, and that just makes her laugh harder.

“We were trying to save them!” Nya defends indignantly. “It’s not our fault they had weak wiring—”

“I just got a little too into it, it’s — it’s Nya’s fault, she’s the one that said it’d be cool if I tried to do shockwave thing like in—”

“That was a mutual thing and you know it!”

“Oh guys, no,” Skylor wheezes into her hands.

“It worked!”

“Poor Mr. Kazami,” Skylor manages, through snickers. Lloyd’s shoulders slump, his upper lip pouting, and Nya crosses her arms, as if refusing to look ashamed.

“It’s not like the other guys aren’t banned from anywhere, either—”

“Alright, alright,” Skylor waves her hands, taking pity on them. “We’ll go somewhere else.”

“Good,” Nya mutters, as Lloyd exhales in relief. Skylor just snickers again, leading them down the sidewalk in the opposite direction. She bites her lip, shaking her head, before a thought occurs to her.

“Wait, what do you mean, ‘it’s not like they aren’t banned from anywhere’?” she frowns. “You guys are banned from more than one place?”

“No,” Nya says firmly, before Lloyd can even speak up. “Forget I said anything.”

Skylor will do no such thing, but she decides it’s in her best interest not to pursue it. Nya is not the sort of person to trifle with, and she does want that ramen.

She gets her answer soon enough, anyways.

2. Ninjago City Aquarium

While Skylor has the early shift on Tuesdays, she does get the afternoons off, which is pretty nice for the most part, if it didn’t mean she’d be bored for the rest of the day. So she hits the grocery store and decides to take the long way home, partially because walking is supposed to be good for you, and partially in hopes that one of the ninja will drop in on her again.

She’s not disappointed.

Granted, a minor explosion going off from inside the Ninjago City Aquarium wasn’t exactly what she was expecting today, but the figures in bright red and white arguing furiously outside the security perimeter are par for the course.

It’s a little odd that they haven’t already rushed in yet, Skylor notes, but with the way they’re loudly yelling at each other in the middle of the street, she figures she’ll find out soon enough.

“No, Kai, it is our civic duty to follow the laws put in place for the safety of civilians—”

“Oh come on, you get brainwashed into a slightly-murderous emperor one time and now you’re a stickler for everything?!”

"One time was enough, Kai!”

“Uh, hi guys,” Skylor approaches the two, hesitantly. “Is everything alright?”

“Skylor!” Kai whirls on her, his eyes wild. “Thank FSM, you’ve gotta help us out — they won’t let us in!” He shakes his fist at the aquarium doors, before springing for the security gate. “Let us in, let us in—”

“Shaking the gate like an animal is not going to convince them, Kai!” Zane pleads, prying Kai away. He shoots Skylor an apologetic glance as he wrangles Kai into a gentle chokehold. “We would greatly appreciate your help, if possible. There’s a low-threat criminal with an unfortunate assortment of weaponry who ran into the aquarium, and we’re legally unable to pursue. If you could try to drive him out, perhaps?”

“I — you — you’re what?” Skylor has the weirdest sense of déjà vu, before it’s lost in confusion. Her head swivels from the frustrated expression on Kai’s face to the pleading one on Zane’s, then to the grocery bags in her hands. She looks back up at Kai, who’s now giving her the puppy eyes. Something from inside the aquarium explodes loudly.

“Sure,” she sighs, handing Kai her grocery bags. “Just one guy?”

“Just one guy,” Kai exhales in relief. “You’re a lifesaver, Skylor, I — hey, are these those snack cakes they made to look like us?”

“Yes, eat them and you die,” Skylor hisses. She turns to Zane, holding her hand out half-hesitantly. “Lend a girl some ice powers?”

“Of course,” Zane nods, letting her take his hand. There’s a brief moment as Skylor melds her power with Zane’s, absorbing the icy force and mimicking it to her own — a part of her notes vaguely that it’s stronger than the last time she borrowed it, but she shakes it off, pulling her hand back and tugging the hood of her jacket up, mentally hoping no one writes another article about the possible existence of a cryptid orange ninja after this.

“Alright,” she says. “Be back in five.”

“Thank you,” Zane says fervently, as Kai sputters, “Hey, why didn’t you borrow my power?”

“Because fire is explosive, and you’ve gotta be banned from here for a reason!” Skylor calls back, ice already misting over her fingertips as she sprints inside the aquarium.

“You’d be surprised,” Kai mutters, after her retreating back.

***********************

“So,” Skylor says, flexing her right hand and wincing briefly. That last right hook she’d thrown at the guy might have been a little too hard, in hindsight. But he was being a jerk, and threatening to set off a bomb near the little seahorses — and it did do the trick, so now the aquarium can have the host of cop cars off its back. Skylor feels pretty accomplished in her good deed for the day, actually. “Why, again, couldn’t you guys have taken care of that yourselves? Not that I minded,” she adds, quickly. Using the ice element had been fun. She’d forgotten what she could do with Zane’s powers.

Kai gives a nervous laugh that’s so fake it almost hurts, especially with the pained expression he makes at the end. Zane just rubs his temple with a hand, looking eternally weary.

“Like I said, we are legally not permitted to enter the aquarium, until…when was it again, Kai?”

“Five years from now,” Kai mutters. “Or whenever the director dies.”

“Yes, five years from now,” Zane repeats, with a dead sort of look in his eyes. “So your assistance was very much appreciated. Thank you.”

“It was no problem, but — wait, hold on, how are you banned from the aquarium for five years?” she stutters. “I mean, I can get Lloyd and Nya with the ramen place—”

“Ha! They told you about that? It was great—”

“Kai, please.”

“—and I can understand Kai, but you, Zane?”

She feels a little guilty for calling him out so bluntly, but it’s Zane. Zane doesn’t just get banned from places, she has to know. And he doesn’t look too upset at the question. Kai looks mildly betrayed, but not that much. They both know Skylor’s point is too valid for him to argue with effectively.

Zane gives another bone-weary sigh. “There is a small chance, that there was a time we were pursuing another villain here, and during that battle, I might have…underestimated the amount of ice I was putting out.” Zane shifts, looking pained. “Which in turn accidentally spread to any bodies of liquid that happened to be nearby at the time, which perhaps were filled with rather expensive aquatic life.”

“You froze a fish exhibit,” Skylor deadpans.

“They were merely in extreme hibernation,” Zane grits out. “They would have been fine, had Kai not tried to fix the ice.”

“Hey, it made sense! I could melt it quickest!”

“Except you didn’t just melt it, did you? No, you had an entire fish fry—”

“The poor fish,” Skylor says, staring at them blankly. “What were they?”

“Like, these rainbow fish, from way up north, I think?” Kai says. “I swear I didn’t make it that hot.”

“The water was boiling, Kai!”

“You fish murderer,” Skylor says, the corners of her mouth trembling with the laugh she’s holding back. Kai glares at Zane, then her, then Zane again.

“I didn’t freeze them solid.”

“Whatever the cause of their death, they died, and we’re banned now,” Zane says, hastily. “End of story. Would you like to take this back to the Bounty, Skylor? I know the others have been wanting to see you, and we can at least offer you tea in thanks.” He eyes the grocery bags Kai’s still holding. “Unless, of course, you wish to return home…”

“Nah, tea sounds good,” she smiles. “Besides, I bought the snack cakes for you guys to try anyways. They’ve got little squashed ninja faces in icing on ‘em.”

“You’re the best,” Kai says, looking somewhat relieved, and oh, he definitely ate one while Skylor was in there. She’s going to have to pay him back for that one…

“Tell me something I don’t know,” she says airily, figuring she’ll take her revenge later. “You can tell me more about the fish massacre on our way back. By the way, Pixal wouldn’t happen to have heard this story, would she?”

Zane gives her a look, and she almost feels bad about it. “I’m going to regret inviting you, aren’t I.”

“Maybe,” she grins. “Jury’s still out.”

3. An Entire Drugstore Chain

Wednesdays are always busy at the noodle shop, for reasons Skylor has yet to figure out. Fridays she understands, but the middle of the week? Nothing kills your drive like knowing you’re going to do this all over again in a day.

It’s good money for the shop though, she reminds herself as she locks up that evening. Any money is good money for the shop, because her stupid dad made sure she’d have a real hole to dig herself out of there, but Wednesday money is always especially good. Even if she ends up leaving the shop late and can’t get the noodle smell from her hair for the next three days.

Normally, she’d trudge home and crash into bed after these kind of shifts. But tonight is different, because she stayed long enough at the Bounty yesterday to get invited to game night, and once you’ve promised the ninja you’re going to bring snacks for Monopoly, you can’t just say no. Not unless you want Lloyd to shoot betrayed glares at you the rest of the month.

Besides, she’s promised Kai she’ll sneak out to the movies with him afterwards, and she can’t just go breaking that promise. Plus, she’s not heartless enough to deny Cole cake when he’s got the most spectacular black eye she’s seen all year bruising up around the left side of his face.

“Lucky hit,” Cole grumbles, after she’s been caught staring too long. She hasn’t wanted to ask him about it, since it seems a sensitive subject and he’s already taking the time to help her pick up (carry) all the snacks. But it’s impossible to miss, even in the dim streetlights they’re walking under, and Skylor cares about her friends, thank you very much. “We busted some drug dealers today, and I got too relaxed.”

“They normally really aren’t any match for you, to be fair,” Skylor offers.

“They weren’t this time either, that’s the sad thing,” Cole says, scrubbing a hand through his thick hair as they wait at the stoplight. “This was all on me. I kinda deserved it.”

“I’m sure it wasn’t that bad,” Skylor tries to console him, even though the ugly red at the edge of his eye says otherwise.

Cole gives her a bleak look. “Jay made a joke, and I laughed at it. And then I got hit across the face with a baseball bat, mid-laugh.”

“Ouch,” Skylor hisses through her teeth. “Never mind, that’s bad. Was it a good joke, at least?”

“No, that’s the thing,” Cole groans, as the light finally turns red, allowing them to cross the street. “It was terrible. And I still laughed hard enough not to notice a bat coming for my face.”

Skylor grimaces. “You were just being a good friend, I guess,” she says, and Cole snorts. “Like you are to me, right now,” she continues, glancing ruefully at the shopping list she’s been sent. “I was going to say I had it handled, then I actually looked at everything you guys asked for.”

Cole laughs sheepishly. “Yeah, that’s…that’s us, I guess. Sorry about that. We’re paying for it all, don’t worry.”

“What?” Skylor blinks. Oh no, no way. The ninja have done enough for her, the least she can do is cover a couple bags of popcorn and like ten things of M&M’s. “No, I got it. I owe you guys, anyways.”

Cole bristles. “No way. We owe you, if anything. The amount of times you’ve covered our tab at the noodle shop?”

“How about the amount of times you’ve saved my noodle shop?” Skylor shoots back. “That outweighs a few measly tabs.”

“The only reason we had to save it was because we were there in the first place,” Cole points out. “We’re danger magnets.”

“I’m sorry, I’m the daughter of Chen, remember?” Skylor huffs. “I can attract enemies all by myself.”

“Not as many as we do,” Cole says. “Also! You helped us beat Chen, and get Zane back. We’re eternally indebted to you.”

Skylor narrows her eyes. “Only after I stabbed you all in the back. So I eternally owe you.”

“Bold of you to assume we haven’t all stabbed each other in the back at some point,” Cole scoffs. “Trust me, you’re nowhere as bad as Lloyd — he like, single-handedly ruined our whole month by letting a bunch of snakes out.”

Skylor pauses at that, torn between refuting his argument and asking how in the world Lloyd, of all people, could possibly manage to wreak enough havoc to—

Actually, she doesn’t have any trouble believing that at all. But to be sure— “Lloyd let the Serpentine out? All by himself?”

Cole looses a bit of his fire, and scuffs his shoe awkwardly across the sidewalk. “I mean, we did give him a pretty hard time when he was like, eight years old and homeless and starving, so uh, it might’ve been a little...provoked.”

“FSM’s sake,” Skylor mutters, staring at the sky and trying not to be surprised, because she really shouldn’t by now. “I can’t believe you guys are all still alive.”

“Neither can we, if it helps,” Cole shrugs, grinning. “But you know, technically—”

“If you make another ghost joke, we’re skipping the cake section,” Skylor says, firmly.

Cole sulks. “Jay would’ve made a ghost joke,” he mutters.

“Jay also got you hit in the face by a bat, so his judgement is questionable as it is,” Skylor shakes her head. “Oh! There’s a drugstore right here, wanna hit that instead?”

“Sure,” Cole says. “As long as it’s not…oh.”

Skylor makes it another three steps before she realizes that Cole’s fallen behind. Confused, she turns to stare at him where he’s frozen on the sidewalk, looking up at the bright red drugstore sign and biting his lip.

“Everything okay back there?” Skylor says, wondering if he didn’t get hit in the head harder than he’s let on. Cole nods, but he also takes several steps back out of the streetlight, hiding himself from view of the store.

“Here’s an idea,” he says, suddenly. “How about we go anywhere else.”

Skylor stares at him, a sinking feeling in her chest coupled with the slowly-growing-familiar sense of déjà-vu. “Cole.” He doesn’t meet her eyes, and Skylor sighs. “Please tell me you haven’t been banned from somewhere, too.”

“It’s not just me, Lloyd and Jay also got banned,” Cole snaps, before realizing his mistake and ducking his head.

“You’re kidding me,” Skylor says flatly, looking back at the drugstore, then to Cole. “This is like, the shadiest drugstore on this side on Ninjago. How?”

Cole mumbles something under his breath, and Skylor strains to make it out. “Sorry, what was that?”

“I kind of, um, threw Lloyd through their wall,” Cole mutters again, looking as if he’d like very much to disappear entirely into the street side. Which is funny, because—

His sentence finally registers, and Skylor blinks rapidly. “Wait, you what?”

Cole’s eyes widen, and waves his arms quickly. “Not like — not like Garmadon-throwing him through a wall! He was fine after.”

Skylor has a brief, bizarre kind of moment to digest the fact that there is a distinction for throwing the youngest of their team through a wall, before Cole continues.

“I was aiming for the window — that one right there, see? The robbers were already on the move, so Lloyd was like ‘launch me, Cole’ and I said ‘great idea’, but we were also maybe high on adrenaline at the time and I forgot how much of my lava punch I had going, so I overshot and ended up smashing him through their wall, a little bit.”

“You smashed him through their wall. Just a little bit.”

“Hey, it worked. He took out all five guys in one go and only had a tiny concussion after—”

“How do you even have a tiny concussion—”

“I still don’t get why they were so mad, I mean we stopped the robbery! Sure, half their storefront wall sort of collapsed afterwards, but like, we got their money back.”

“So that’s why they were closed six months for renovations,” Skylor groans into her hands.

Cole crosses his arms, glaring stubbornly at the store’s sign. “It wasn’t six months,” he protests. “It was only like, four. I don’t see how that gives them the right to ban us for life.”

“For life—” Skylor can’t decide if she wants to laugh at him, or cry because her list of places she can hang out with the ninja is shrinking faster than she’d thought possible. She finally blows her breath out, rubs a hand across her face, and glances back down at the shopping list.

“You aren’t banned from the one on eighth street, are you?”

Cole bites his lips. “We’re uh, banned from all of them. It’s a chain store, so…”

“Of course,” Skylor sighs. “Walmart it is, then.”

And if anyone pesters them about being late, she’s going to ask how many times, exactly, somebody’s smashed Lloyd through a wall. Because really. This is getting ridiculous.

4. Bed Bath & Beyond

Thursday is normally her day off, but whatever she had for dinner last night gave her freaky dreams, so Skylor ends up puttering around the shop early that morning just to take her mind off it. It’s a bit overcast outside, and the forecast predicts rain, so Skylor’s already making plans to curl up in her bed and watch movies all day, and maybe get a bit of laundry done.

She should know better.

It’s a commonly known fact that the ninja, Kai especially, would do pretty much anything for their pseudo-little brother. Skylor’s actually heard Kai, on multiple occasion, threaten to die for Lloyd, then immediately try and make it reality. No one ever really appreciates that, Lloyd especially, but Skylor can give him credit for trying.

However, it’s a commonly overlooked fact that Lloyd would do anything for his pseudo-older siblings. It’s an even more commonly overlooked fact that Lloyd is the spawn of satan, and was raised at a boarding school for future villains and terrible children. Combined, these two facts mean that while you should definitely fear Lloyd trying to die for you, you should probably fear him trying to look out for you more, because it’s likely going to end with somebody dead. Or at least the total disruption of your plans for the day, as Skylor opens the shop windows to come face with an absolutely terrifying expression on Lloyd’s face, followed up by a deadly calm “Kai came home sad last night.”

Skylor scrubs at her eyes, and thinks, it’s too early for this.

A while back, when she was still stuck with her jerk of a father, Skylor might have found Lloyd’s part-Oni expression of doom intimidating. Now, however, she just rolls her eyes, and sticks one of the little ‘50% Off!’ stickers she’s been putting on rice cakes across his forehead.

“The dog died in the last movie we saw last night,” she explains, as Lloyd sputters at her.

He pauses, nose wrinkling. “Oh,” he says. “Boo.”

“Yeah,” she says, stepping back and allowing him to neatly front-flip through her window. Darned show-off kid, she thinks despairingly, watching him land perfectly on her freshly-waxed floors.

“Well, you’re good then, I guess,” he says, expression lightening. “That makes sense. How many movies did you make it into this time, by the way?”

“Only four this time,” Skylor sighs, turning to plaster the rest of her stickers on the nearly-expired rice cake packages. “We caught the beginning of that new superhero movie, then the opening fight of some spy movie, and the middle of that one horror movie with the dolls.” Lloyd shudders. “Yeah, Kai wasn’t a fan either. Anyways, we made it into this new romance one, but we ran into a theater employee on the way in and Kai had a guilt attack, so we stayed until the end of that one.”

Lloyd tsks. “Oh, Kai. And he’s so sold on his bad boy image.”

“One day he’ll embrace the fact that he’s just a big softie,” Skylor nods. “One of these days.”

“Yeah, when hell freezes over,” Lloyd snorts. He glances around at the empty shop, then back at her. “Hey, today’s your day off, right?”

Skylor gets a sinking kind of feeling in her stomach at that, alarm bells going off in the back of her head. “It might be,” she says, warily.

“Good,” Lloyd grins. “You should come to Bed Bath and Beyond with us, then.”

Well, she wasn’t expecting that. “Why…would you be going there?” she asks, blankly. Do they have a secret ninja weapon bargain bin she’s been missing out on? Is Bed Bath & Beyond secretly hosting an illegal crime ring she’s been unaware of? Does she need to return the shower curtain rings she bought there last week on basis of being a good citizen?

“Zane froze the blender solid before practice this morning,” Lloyd explains, his mouth twisting a bit. “We were making smoothies and someone accidentally brought up the Never Realm.”

“Ouch,” Skylor winces sympathetically. She’s still not heard the entire story of what went down during the ninja’s jaunt out of realm, besides a whole lot of panicked texts from Pixal and half-explanations from Kai, but she knows it wasn’t fun, especially for poor Zane.

“Yeah,” Lloyd sighs. “So now our blender is dead and we can’t make smoothies anymore, so we’re buying a new one before Nya can start strangling people. Wanna come?”

Skylor eyes him shrewdly. At face, it’s an innocent enough request. She’s certainly been invited to worse places than a household furnishings store, and picking up a blender is quite possibly the simplest thing the ninja have ever asked her to do. Which probably just means it’s going to go horribly and the store’s going to blow up ten minutes in, but hey, Skylor’s day was looking pretty boring anyway.

“Sure, why not,” she shrugs. “Lemme stick the last of these on, and I’m in. Just — hey, no, I’m selling those!”

Lloyd freezes in place, the rice cake package dangling from his fingers. He gives her the most pathetically sad-eyed look she’s ever seen, and not for the first time, Skylor finds herself wondering how this is the same kid who runs a highly-skilled ninja team of unimaginable power.

“Just the one,” she finally relents, because Skylor is a spineless weakling when it comes to puppy eyes, apparently. Lloyd beams, snatching the cakes up happily. “And just because you look like a starving vagrant again.”

“I do not,” Lloyd protests, through a muffled mouthful of rice cake. “I’m just super in shape. I’m jacked as heck.”

Skylor rolls her eyes. “Sure you are, you — hey, I said just one!”

***********************

So Skylor ends up at Bed Bath & Beyond on her day off, five minutes after the store’s opened for the day, and already wishing she’d slept in later.

Nya brings her coffee, though, and their bright-eyed enthusiasm at reclaiming their means of smoothie-making is infectious, so Skylor finds herself in high spirits as they walk through the store doors, almost to the point where she lets Lloyd go for stealing all her rice cakes.

However, she’s already let him get away with too much as it is, so Skylor decides to take her revenge by ruffling Lloyd’s hair, before informing the sales lady that it’s her “darling little brother’s thirteenth birthday, and he’s finally outgrown his kiddie bed, could you point us to the big kid ones, please?”

Lloyd’s attempts at strangling her are thwarted by Nya as the lady smiles airily, before pointing them to the back, and Zane has to drag Kai along with them before he suffocates on the laughter he’s choking back.

“Family shopping trips are always so much fun,” Jay remarks, as they browse the bedding section, having been successfully distracted by the animal-shaped pillows. They’ve already had to flee the lamp section, after Lloyd and Jay started having a little too much fun, despite Kai’s despair over being robbed yet again of a new lava lamp.

“One day,” he mourns. “One day, I will own another.”

Skylor pats his back consolingly. “I’m sure that’s what everyone else whose lava lamps got smashed by a giant stone colossi say.”

“I still don’t see why we can’t invest in a cappuccino maker,” Nya pouts, as they pass the coffee appliances section. “Look, there’s one on sale, too!”

“Because you can and will abuse the use of it, and then someone will end up going to the hospital for extreme heart rate elevation,” Zane glares pointedly at her. Skylor smothers a laugh as Nya scowls.

“I’m not that bad,” she grumbles under her breath, only for the others to all chime “ice cube incident” in unison. Nya goes a dark shade of red and glares at the floor as if she’s capable of lighting it on on fire with her eyes, but she doesn’t argue back.

Skylor doesn’t even want to know.

“Alright, here are our options,” Cole announces, when they’ve finally fought their way to the blender shelves. “We can get the same one we had, just a little smaller, or we can get this other one that’s half-off.” He squints at both tags. “Having looked at our bank account recently, I vote the half-off one.”

“No way,” Jay argues. “Do you see how small that one is? I can’t make my triple-espresso energy-drink smoothie with that!”

Lloyd stares at him in concern. “That’s…probably a good thing?”

Jay glares at him. “You’re one to talk, Mr. night owl.”

“I’m with Jay, that one’s way too small,” Nya says. “It won’t do.”

“What, and the other one’s better?” Kai shoots back. “Look how cheap it is, I could break this thing in my sleep.”

“The online reviews for both are perfectly fine,” Zane adds, half-heartedly, as if he already knows they’re all going to ignore that particular statement.

“What about this one?” Jay says, his eyes lighting up as he gestures to the extra-large, fancy blender. “Think of all the smoothies we could make, Cole. Think of the milkshakes.”

Cole pinches the bridge of his nose. “We are not investing in some fancy blender, just for you to complain it’s too complicated five seconds in.”

Skylor crosses over to the blenders, glancing at both. “I mean, you could always just return it…later…” She trails off, realizing that everyone’s suddenly gone deadly silent. She looks up, and starts as she comes face to face with the store manager, who is frozen in place, his mouth half-open as he stares at them with wide eyes. Behind her, Skylor is highly aware of six ninja going similarly still, all utterly quiet.

“You,” the manager finally squeaks out. “You are’t supposed to — you can’t be in here, not again—”

“On second thought, let’s get a blender next week,” Cole says, quickly.

“Yeah, I can live without smoothies a little longer,” Jay agrees, rapidly paling.

Skylor’s at a loss. “What’s going—”

Before she can finish that sentence, Kai and Nya both have hands on her arm and pull, hauling her along as they break into a dead sprint for the exit.

“Explain later!” Kai yelps, dodging employees as the manager shakes his fist at them, his yelling following them through the doors.

“I filed six restraining orders! Six!” he shrieks as they slip out. “Do you know how long that took?! Two of them don’t even exist in the legal system!”

Skylor doesn’t miss the incredibly unsubtle fist bump Lloyd and Zane share, nor the near-tears  sigh of despair from Cole.

She really, really doesn’t want to know.

***********************

Except that maybe she does, so there’s nothing stopping her from asking as they walk home, having bought smoothies from the corner store instead (that they are not banned from, which Skylor is starting to think might be miraculous).

“I don’t know why I’m surprised at this point, but how did you get banned this time?” she asks them, after a particularly long sip of smoothie. “Did you demolish half the store there, too?”

The ninja are silent for a moment, all refusing to meet her eyes. Then—

“It was Jay’s fault,” Cole declares.

Jay whirls on him, his expression wounded. “I trusted you,” he whines. “And you — you bed bath and betrayed me.”

“Because you bed bath and blew up the bedding aisle!”

“It was the kitchen electrics aisle, give me some credit.”

“Oh, because that’s so much better.”

“It is, do you know how hard I’d have to be trying to blow up the bedding aisle? It’s all weighted blankets and like, silk and stuff, no conduction at all—”

Skylor returns to her previous stance on not wanting to know, sips her smoothie in silence as they break into loud arguing in the middle of the street, and hopes once again that no one’s getting any pictures of this.

5. Jamanakai Village Candy Shop

Friday’s her busy day, so Skylor’s spared any chaos other than a jammed mixing machine for the day. It doesn’t come to a head until Saturday, when she cautiously accepts the ninjas' invitation to scout out potential terrorist activity in Jamanakai.

The terrorists turn out to be punk kids who got a little too obsessed with the idea of the Golden Master, which is an unfortunate choice of role model for them, when they have to face up to the ninja. Zane just looks mildly annoyed though, and Lloyd stares into the sun for a full minute before rolling his eyes, so the kids make it out alive.

“We weren’t going to kill them, geez,” Jay says. “Maybe just…lecture them, a bit.”

“Oh yeah, lecture them,” Kai scowls, cracking his knuckles. “The Golden Master, are they kidding?”

“To be fair, they don’t have the same experiences we do,” Cole points out, but he doesn’t look too opposed to the knuckle-cracking, either.

“No harm was done,” Zane says, a bit wearily. “We should simply let it go."

“I dunno, I say we should’ve hung them from a roof for a bit,” Lloyd says, evenly.

The other ninja all cringe in unison, except for Nya, who smothers a coughing sort of laugh. Skylor stares at them, bewildered. “Why would you hang them from a roof?”

“Not sure,” Lloyd says, his lips twitching. “Probably because crime doesn’t pay, muchacho, or something like that—”

“Alright, alright, we get it,” Kai says hastily, clapping a hand over Lloyd’s mouth.

“The guys would know,” Nya smirks, ignoring the looks of utter betrayal she’s getting. “That’s what they did to Lloyd, wasn’t it?”

“Nya, why,” Jay moans into his hands.

“You — hung Lloyd from a roof?” Skylor repeats, thrown for a loop. “Why on earth would you do that? What if he like, fell and died?”

“He was fine,” Cole assures her, hastily.

Lloyd is quick to protest, glaring at them. “No I wasn’t, it was literally scarring! Look, I got this scar from scraping my arm when I fell — oh, wait, oops, that one’s from the Never Realm, it’s this one here.” Lloyd winces as he finishes, suddenly looking contrite as he shoots Zane an apologetic look. “The Never Realm one was from Boreal though, don’t worry.”

Zane looks down, his face shadowed. “It was still my—”

“Nuh-uh,” Jay cuts over him, wagging his finger. “Remember the rule?”

Zane hesitates, looking as if he’d very much like to remember no such thing, but he finally slumps, relenting. “Scars dealt to each other while under the influence of malicious possession by person and/or ancient malevolent artifacts do not count, regardless of extenuating circumstances or deep inner psychological issues that may be brought to light during said influence,” he quotes dully, on a defeated sort of sigh.

Skylor doesn’t know whether to be impressed at that, or depressed that it needed existence in the first place.

“Exactly,” Jay nods. “Which means that any scars from you, Zane, or Lloyd — oh, and Kai, I guess — and Cole, technically, with the Hypnobrai that one time— wow, that’s, hm, that’s a lot of us.”

“If you count the dark matter, we’ve all been possessed,” Zane says, drily.

“Not me!” Kai says, mock-cheerfully.

Jay shakes his head. “Nobody got scars while we were on dark matter! I checked.”

“Why are you saying it like we were on drugs or something?”

“Speak for yourself,” Lloyd scowls. “I’ve still got that stupid ankle one.” He glares at the offending ankle, as if it’s personally disappointed him.

“That was the Overlord, not us,” Nya reminds him. “And uh, your dad, technically.”

Lloyd’s scowl just deepens, his eyebrows tilting downwards hotly. “If I had a dollar for every scar that’s from my dad…”

“I hear you,” Skylor sighs. “Dad scars are the worst. They really know where to hit.”

“Right? It’s always personal with them,” Lloyd shakes his head. “Dads are the worst.”

A beat passes before they both realize the others have fallen quiet. Her and Lloyd blink, and Skylor fights back the urge to cringe at the looks they’re now receiving.

“Well,” Jay says, bleakly. “This is a, um, miserable turn.”

“Hey, hey, no sad faces,” Lloyd scolds, reaching for Kai’s face, which is indeed sporting a pathetically teary-eyed kind of look. “Get that look off your face, off, off—”

“I’m not — stoppit — I’m just— hey, stop it— that’s my face, you brat—”

“Guys, c’mon, cut it out, you’re making a scene,” Cole scolds, pulling them both apart. “How about we stop and get ice cream before we go, okay? To like, cheer us up. Because that was completely depressing, no offense, guys.”

“None taken,” Skylor says, as Lloyd nods in agreement. Cole looks relieved, even if Kai’s still looking a little weepy, and he directs them down another street, heading toward a brightly labeled ice cream shop. Skylor can see tiny rows of candy inside, and there are a bunch of kids gathered around the little stand the owner’s set up at the door. It’s a cute place, all in all — the candy looks good, and it seems pretty cheap.

So it makes zero sense that Lloyd, of all people, would suddenly go painfully tense in the middle of the street, and refuse to take another step forward.

“I can’t go in there,” he whispers.

Skylor’s having that sense of déjà vu again. The rest of the ninja trade confused glances.

“Uh, Lloyd?” Kai says, hesitantly. “They sell candy in there, you know.”

“I know,” Lloyd grinds out, his teeth clenched painfully together. “I’ve been in there before.”

“You have?” Cole frowns. “You — oh.” Realization dawns in his eyes, and he’s suddenly biting his lip, holding back laughter. “Oh, I forgot.”

“Forgot wha—” Jay looks between the two of them, then back at the shop, before something sparks in his eyes as well, and he doubles over in laughter.

“Shut up,” Lloyd hisses.

“Why are we laughing at Lloyd,” Skylor finally sighs, as Kai and Zane break into barely-stifled giggles as well, and Nya rolls her eyes.

“So, um,” Lloyd swallows, shifting anxiously from side to side. “You know how I said they hung me from a roof? There might’ve, uh, been a reason for that.”

“Of course there was,” Skylor says.

“I kind of threatened them, a little bit, and uh, tried to steal half their shop, one time.”

“Of course you did.”

“Lloyd,” Nya sighs. “That was forever ago.”

“I stole from them,” Lloyd bites out. “If I show my face in there again, they’ll kill me."

“I highly doubt they will resort to murder, Lloyd,” Zane says, flatly. “Besides, you did not actually succeed in stealing anything, because we caught you and hung you from a roof. Remember?”

“Yeah, and then I came back with the Serpentine, and made it worse!” Lloyd exclaims. “Just go in without me, I’ll sit out here and cry.”

“We’re not just gonna leave you outside,” Kai rolls his eyes. “C’mon, let’s mend some old wounds. Just go inside and apologize.”

“I would literally rather die.”

“Lloyd, seriously.”

“I’ve done it before, don’t test me.”

“Lloyd.”

“You can’t make me, I’ll fight you—”

“Alright, alright, we’ll find a different shop!”

***********************

“Okay, I have to know,” Skylor finally asks, as they pass the outskirts of the village, heading back to the Bounty. “How many places are you all banned from, in total? Because this is ridiculous. I can’t take you anywhere.”

“I mean, you can’t take us anywhere even without the bans, anyways,” Cole says wearily. “To be fair.”

“We’re not that bad,” Lloyd protests, only to wilt immediately under Skylor’s stare. “There are just…a few places…”

“Zane, how many is it now,” Nya asks, rubbing her temples.

Zane is quiet for a moment, slowly ticking off his fingers as he stares upwards. “Did we ever decide if that one museum counted?”

“The vote was yes,” Jay mutters.

“And the Explorer’s Club, did we decide that one?”

“I’d say that’s a pretty hard ban,” Lloyd winces.

Nya huffs, crossing her arms. “I still say it doesn’t count, because like, everyone’s banned from there, with their stupid stuck-up membership requirements.”

Zane takes this into account, his eyebrows furrowing. “That leaves us with…seventeen places we cannot return to, I believe? Unless I missed one.”

Skylor’s left wordless, gaping at them. She knew there was a lot, but seventeen—?!

“I’m almost a hundred percent sure we’re also banned from the Never Realm,” Kai points out. Zane gives him the iciest look Skylor’s ever seen. Kai simply shrugs. “What? Just stating the facts.”

Lloyd frowns. “I don’t think we are? I mean, Akita wouldn’t—”

“Oh, Akita wouldn’t,” Jay cuts over him, a gleam in his eyes. “Would she, casanova?”

Lloyd goes scarlet, sputtering. “I told you, she kissed me! On the cheek! I just stood there, you can’t—” He buries his face in his hands, and despite her amusement (and rampant curiosity, because this is Lloyd and kissing), Skylor feels bad for him. “I can’t believe I ever told any of you about that,” he whines, sounding tragically upset with himself.

“You were the one having a mental breakdown over it,” Nya reminds him, almost gently. “You need to work on setting boundaries, bud.”

“It’s not like I didn’t tell her I had horrible issues with romance!” Lloyd throws his hands up, frustrated. “Because I did, in painfully honest detail—”

“And yet you refuse to open up to me about it,” Kai says plaintively.

“Turn into a dog for a bit, you might get lucky,” Lloyd grumbles.

Skylor doesn’t want to know. She really, really doesn’t want to know. “Well,” she finally says. “I do know one place you aren’t banned from.”

They all look up at her, and Skylor shakes her head. “You fly me back to the shop in time for dinner, and noodles are on the house tonight.”

Six faces brighten considerably. “Seriously?” Cole says. “Skylor, you’re an angel.”

“Seriously, the best person ever—”

“Our favorite cryptid orange ninja there ever was—”

“Yeah, yeah, keep flattering me,” Skylor sighs, trying not to smile, and failing woefully.

She doesn’t know why she still hangs out with these people, getting banned from everywhere in the city. What a bunch of nerds.

[startanewdream]

(Not) A Summer Date

Written for @efkgirldetective's Summer of Jily. I couldn't resist writing about Carnivals (even if the ones I researched are nothing like the modern ones). Thanks for organizing this!

Please enjoy this silly sample of James and Lily spending a day together in what James swears it's not a date.

Read on AO3 or below:

____________________

It’s not a date.

It’s not.

They are just two friends who got dumped by their friends and happen to be at the same place at the same time. A place and a time they agreed upon previously. Together.

It’s not a date.

At least, that’s what James tells himself over and over, though as time goes by he really can’t tell why it isn’t one.

He is alone with Lily, after all, the girl he has had a crush on since forever—it’s since Fourth Year, but he doesn’t remember ever fancying anyone before that—just the two of them enjoying each other’s company. It was not supposed to be like that. They had exchanged letters a lot that Summer and when Lily mentioned a Muggle carnival happening in a park in London, James had jumped at the opportunity of going there with her.

Not just him, of course, this was all for Sirius’ interest in Muggle culture, or so James had expressly written in the letter back to her. And if James’ friends would go, then it wasn’t a date; he loved his friends, but he didn’t bring them to a date.

Except Sirius cancelled at the last time, Peter had owled him saying he couldn’t come and Remus had said he was feeling under the weather, all in the last possible minute, so James couldn’t warn Lily in time to reschedule. He had gone to the park, feeling strangely awkward, and to his surprise, Lily had shown up alone too. He had expected her friends to be there with her—they had formed a nice group of friends in the last year—, but he supposed she was equally dumped by her friends.

James had guessed they would cancel, but instead of looking upset, Lily had just smiled at him, her cheeks coloured because of the warm sunny day—though it was already dusk—and had just asked him what he wanted to do first.

And that is how James finds himself on a date with Lily.

Except it isn’t a date.

He knows this is not one, no matter how much he wishes things were different. If it were a date, he would have grabbed her hand when they went to that roller coaster that he really doubted if it was safe (though he kept quiet and faced it bravely); or he would have pulled her closer when they left the spinning ride, holding her in his arms until the world stopped dizzying around them.

And most of all he’d not have enjoyed the view from the giant wheel if they were on a date. Instead, James would have gathered his courage to place his arm around Lily’s bare shoulder, with some excuse about keeping her warm—even though the summer night was warm enough—that Lily would accept because it would be a date. She’d bit her lip to avoid a smile at his clumsy excuse, her eyes shining with the shadow of her amusement, and James’ attention would be diverted to her lips; she’d open them in a quiet invitation, and when he’d look back at her eyes, her answer would be ready even before he’d make the question.

And then, finally, he’d approach her, lips brushing tenderly in a way he could feel her smile before…

Before nothing, because they are not on a date and James doesn’t want to mess up their friendship.

That’s what they are. Friends. Who are certainly not on a date.

After the giant wheel, he gives up on any ride. Those eight minutes were enough to make him crawl up the walls, his treacherous mind unable to drift away from the fact that he was alone with Lily in an enclosed cabin and James doesn’t think he can survive another emotion like that.

They stop for a quick dinner and Lily introduces him to popcorn and his favourite rainbow cotton candy.

‘This can’t be normal,’ he mumbles, watching as the vendor prepares him the cotton candy.

‘It’s magic,’ she teases him. She picks up the cotton candy and eats a mouthful with a challenging expression on her face, but James doesn’t concentrate on this. If he’d kiss her now, James knows he would taste all the sugar on her lips.

His mouth gets dry.

He eats the cotton candy in a quiet silence after that, careful to look at everywhere but to his side, where Lily stands carefully licking the candy out of her fingers.

This is not a date; this is pure torture.

After that, James supposes he should tell her it’s late and they should go home, but Lily grabs him by the hand—her fingers entwining with his as if this is the most normal thing ever, as if her hand isn’t so warm and soft, as if that touch doesn’t make him burn with longing for more —and pulls him to the game tents.

‘This is what I told you about,’ she says brightly, referring to her latest letter and her vivid descriptions of Muggle carnivals. ‘You are gonna love this.’

James isn’t sure he is capable of loving anything else that night, but he doesn’t say anything.

He tries to focus on the games; the first ones are lucky games, and James’ luck doesn’t favour him. Lily gets a cartoonish fawn plushie, which she gives him.

‘It reminds me of you,’ she says, amused with her own thoughts, and James smiles at the coincidence.

‘Well, I should get you something then.’

Her eyes widen, a curious expression there that James doesn’t understand. They are in the middle of a row with game tents, children running around them, a mess of sounds and lights, and somehow he feels they are the only ones in the world when Lily takes a step closer to him, her hand placing an invisible strand of her hair behind her ear.

‘And what will you get me, Potter?’

It’s been a while since Lily has called him by his surname, but it sounds nice; not exactly friendly, but… provocative.

And though the moment is completely different from when they were at the giant wheel, James feels again that urge to move forward, to cup her face, lower his head and…

Not a date.

He turns his head hurriedly, cricking his neck in the process, and his eyes fall on a giant plush lion.

‘A lion!’, he cries, making her jump. ‘I will get you a lion, come on.’

Lily raises her eyebrows, but he doesn’t wait for her answer. James doubts he can control his impulse if they stay this close longer, so he walks towards the game tent; as far as he can tell, it’s easy: all he needs to do is throw an orange ball through a hoop. The person in front of him in the line is bad at it for some reason, but James is a chaser and a good one. He can do this.

‘Oh-oh,’ Lily mumbles at his side. ‘You’re gonna lose money here, James.’

‘How come?’

‘This game is nearly impossible to win.’

James frowns. He looks around, but no other tent has the same plush lion and he already promised he would give one to Lily.

‘I got this,’ he says confidently. When Lily still looks nervous, he winks at her, which, for some reason, makes her look away, a flush coming to her cheeks even as she shakes her head.

James doesn’t get this. He swears he throws the ball perfectly, but the first one bounces in the hoop, the second one doesn’t even hit the hoop and the third one is thrown too much to the left.

He pays another coin.

‘One more time.’

Lily joins him for a few rounds; her throws aren’t much better than his, but they aren’t worse either, which somehow baffles James. He is a good chaser, he holds the current record of goals in a game. He should get this stupid Muggle game.

‘I think we are getting good at this,’ Lily tells him ironically by their eighth or ninth attempt when the latest ball twirls around the hoop before missing it.

‘I am a disaster ,’ James admits, when his last coin is spent fruitlessly. The ball refuses to pass through the hoop.

‘You are not,’ Lily assures him. She seems more amused by his reaction than upset he was a failure.

‘I couldn’t make a single goal. That’s it. I’m resigning as Quidditch Captain.’

‘Because of one rigged Muggle game?’ Lily shakes her head. ‘I told you, it’s not made for anyone to win. The hoop is not round, the ball bounces too easily.’

‘Why is this even allowed?’

‘For the fun of it,’ she tells him, and then she bits her lip in a way James has seen before; she is nervous, gathering courage for something. When their gazes meet, her expression relaxes; her eyes are shining under the lights of the carnival. ‘I had fun,’ she says softly.

‘Watching me make a fool of myself?’

‘Not this. Even if we didn’t win… you have this expression when you are concentrated in a game, all focused like when you are flying as if nothing could distract you and… it’s nice to watch.’

‘You enjoy watching me?’ he repeats, fazed, because now he has said it out loud, it feels like there is some meaning behind it that he can’t quite grasp, something too unfathomable until this moment.

‘Well, I wouldn’t have asked you out if I didn’t,’ she says, her voice sounding half as if this is obvious, half as if she is embarrassed by it. ‘Come on, you can spend my last coin trying to hit the darts there.’

She walks to the next tent without looking at him, her face still flushed, and James takes a while to follow her because his mind is still frozen.

Asked him out? Surely she doesn’t mean like that . Lily didn’t ask him out , she just mentioned a Carnival and told him it would be fun to go there and James had agreed… And Lily knows his friends should come and one does not bring friends to a date.

But Lily’s friends are not there yet.

‘Too bad Mary couldn’t come,’ he says slowly as he tries to aim the dart in his hand. It’s easy to pretend all his concentration is on that hit instead of waiting for her answer.

‘Oh, I didn’t call her,’ Lily says, her voice nonchalant, and James misses the dart completely. This time, he doesn’t complain.

James doubts he could form a sentence. His brain doesn’t seem to be working at all; nothing seems to be making sense, because if he could think thoroughly, then… then he would need to accept that Lily asked him out and then they are on a… No, that would be impossible, they are just friends who happen to have spent an afternoon all by themselves…

The lights of the park start to go out and they walk towards the exit; at least, when they reach the place they met—carefully out of Muggle’s prying eyes—Lily turns to watch him. She looks somewhat nervous as if she is expecting something .

‘I had fun today,’ she says at least when James stays silent. There is an underlying question in her voice that James knows how to answer.

‘I… me too.’

Lily looks relieved. ‘Good.’

‘Sorry for not getting you a gift—you can keep this fawn until—’

‘No, keep Bambi.’ She hesitates a little, her head lowering enough not to look him directly in the eyes. ‘You can get me a lion on the next date.’

‘I will—what?’

‘A lion. Or anything, really, I don’t know where I would—’

‘No, you said… a date.’

‘Yeah, well.’ She rolls her eyes as if it is nothing, though her cheeks are coloured.

‘This isn’t a date.’

‘Oh.’ Now Lily looks even more embarrassed, taking a step back. ‘I had thought… okay. Sorry.’

She looks away now, seemingly wishing to just disappear, but James knows whatever she is feeling is nothing like his current panic.

‘This couldn’t be a date. I would know if it were one.’ She turns back to him, a disbelieving expression on her face. James flushes. ‘I think.’

‘That’s okay, James, really. I just… don’t think of today as a date if you—’

‘Tomorrow,’ he interrupts her hurriedly. ‘Let’s come back here tomorrow. No, wait. Evans.’ He takes a deep breath, his heart beating too fast on his chest. He needs to do this right. ‘Would you like to go out with me tomorrow?’

He knows her answer even before she says anything just by the light on her eyes.

‘I’d love to, James.’

‘Then it’s a date.’

Lily beams, a bold expression coming to her face; it was the same she had before facing all the rides of the park, and she takes a step closer to him, rising on her tiptoes and placing a soft kiss on his cheek.

It feels better than that whooping sensation he got on the roller coaster.

‘See you tomorrow,’ she whispers, and then she disappears on the spot.

James raises his hand to touch where she kissed. Tomorrow will be their second date. He can’t wait for it.

____________________________

“Dear Sirius,

Your best friend is under the impression I invited you over too. I didn’t; I can show you a Muggle Carnival some other time.

Please make up a good excuse to not crash our date tomorrow.

Hope you are enjoying this summer.

Lots of love,

Lily.”

[popculturebuffet]

Darkwing Double Feature: The Quiverwing Quack and Paint Misbehavin (Paint Misbehavin Comissoned by WeirdKev27)

Greetings darkwings of the night! It’s time to return to our daring duck of mystery for a third double feature! This one’s been a longtime coming.. as in since around black friday when I did a comissions sale. As usual Kev was my only customer and he bought both Splatter Phoenix episodes... and I shamefully admit this one has sat in my queue for a while as I wanted to finish the justice ducks retrospective first, as I also wanted to cover Quiverwing Quack’s first appearance, on my own time, and I wanted to save doing any Negaduck till I got done with Justice Ducks.  And that’s where errors were made, as I PAUSED said retrospective forgetting I both had this review sitting in my queue, and that I really didnt have that much left to go on it. SO yeah this took WAY longer than I usually do for a commission, and I apologize for that and i’m happy to correct it, with this, along with the freebie I gave him at the time, coming out tommorow i’ll finally be caught up and promise this won’t happen again.  So with my needed apologizes out of the way, let’s talk about why this is a double feature. Simple: Paint Misbehavin is Quiverwing Quack, Gosalyn’s superhero alter ego’s, only other appearance on the show. It would appear in the comics.. in a fashion.. but we’ll get to that. So it dind’t feel quite right covering one without the other, especially since this version of gos is a fan faviorite of many. So does our  archer live up to the hype? Let’s get dangerous under the cut and find out. 

The Quiverwing Quack:

This.. may be the best Darkwing i’ve seen so far. There is some competition of course, but this one is easily the frontrunner. It’s hilarious, has a really great and intresting plot, few faults, and is just.. about as good as this show can get. I could end that here but I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t, so let’s get into why. 

The episode starts with a fairly typical day for Darkwing: Fighting Negaduck, hilariously as always, and mocking his arch enemy for only being Public Enemy #2 behind Dr. Slug, an oft mentioned but never seen in an actual episode villian that’s apparently one of DW’s deadliest foes. So already we have a great motive for Negaduck, who usually just has the motive of “destroy darkwing’ or do evil, though to the show’s credit, just looking at the summaries for his other eps alone, they NEVER ran out of ideas for the guy or forgot he was as clever as he was ax crazy. 

But just as he’s about to beat darkwing, Gosalyn arrives with an archery set Launchpad purchased for her and easily holds him down. And rather than be greatful Drake is mad at her and feels the arrows are too dangerous which.. fair those look to be real arrows but not the time or place.  Gosalyn however is angry her dad stopped her and is chafing both under his overprotectivness and feeling this is about ego, creates her own crime fighting alter ego Quiverwing Quack, dragging Honker along as her sidekick Arrow Boy. He dosen’t WANT to get into hero work, but he’s afraid she’ll pulverize him if he dosen’t. HA HA.. GET IT.. BECAUSE SHE’S A GIRL AND IT’S NOT LIKE GIRLS CAN ABUSE BOYS HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAA

Yeah as you can tell that bit hasn’t aged well and is the one down note in an otherwise great episode. And I do mean great. Because this essential conflict works perfectly and is expertly built on what we’ve already seen of the characters. 

For starters Gosalyn forming her own hero identity feels like a natural evolution of her character. It genuinely feels that, given her love for adventure and of her dad being a superhero, that she’d take the next step in wanting to follow in her footsteps and put on her own costume eventually. Her making her OWN rather than something derivitative of darkwing also perfectly fits both her anger at her dad’s overprotectivness and her own individual nature. The costume itself is.. okay pretty simplistic, with an early green arrow style hat and some gloves and boots.. but while I didn’t like it at first It’s grown on me a bit, as I realized it feels like the kind of a costume a kid would throw together and given Gosalyn dosne’t have her dad’s backing, it makes sense the costume would be slapped together. Grante dit dosen’t explain her trick arrows, but given we’ve seen gosalyn is pretty talented and that she can easily acess Darkwing’s lair, it’s not a huge stretch to say she went into her dad’s lair while he was gone, took some suplies and made the arrows herself. 

And i’ll freely admit i’m a sucker for a good archer hero as Hawkeye is easily one of my faviroite superheroes. Which granted is a sentence I know will probably baffle anyone who hasn’t picked up a comic with clint, or has but it was written by brianmicheal bendis, as in the movies up to Endgame you could easily replace him with a block of wood with a purple h painted on it and no one would notice the difference. And other archer heroes like Arowette, Speedy, Kate Bishop, Arsenal and Green Arrow are also on the whole pretty fucking awesome, as is the Young Justice Cartoon version of Artemis and the JLU version of Green Arrow. So this was kind of a slam dunk for me and the fact Gos’ costume comes off as a combination of Hawkeye and Green Arrow, having Ollie’s hat but Clint’s purple color scheme and gloves with no sleeves aesthetic, just makes me all the more on board for this. 

What truly makes the episode though is Darkwing, whose internal conflict is masterful to watch. While his being overproective isn’t anything new to the show, this episode takes it in a more dramatic directon: While there’s still a few jokes the episode gives some very painful reasons why he’s like this: He dosen’t want to loose his baby girl, both figuratively in her growing up and becoming more self sufficent.. and literally in her dying. It’s a terror any parent faces and it makes him sympathetic: While he IS overreacting at times and would be better off training her and helping nurture her while still keeping her safe, so when she DOES run off to do her own thing she’ll be ready, you can’t blame him for not wanting that, for wanting her to just stay home, stay safe and stay ALIVE.  The comics, which i’ve read some of and will cover here at some point, make this hit HARDER as during the second arc, where we meet a bunch of Darkwing Ducks from other dimenisons.. and one of them is Quiverwing Duck. You can probably guess just by the name what happened to his Gosalyn after years and years of working together. 

So the risk .. is very real. Loosing her is VERY possible. Being a kid to teen superhero is a VERY dangerous line of work as with less experince and being a possible target if you have any mentors, and sometimes you genuinely DON’T make it. Cypher, Jason Todd Robin, Ultimate Peter Parker, Synch, Danny Chase, Kid Devil, Skin, Wallflower, Icarus, Genisis.. the list goes on, and on, and while MOST of them came back even then the ones that did didnt exactly lack in scars: Jason was never the same after the joker’s beating and Doug, Cypher, had severe trauma he never adressed. The danger Darkwing fears is VERY real.. but is a danger she faces ANYWAY by rushing in and acompanying him. The tragedy is traning her would at least give her a fighting chance as it’s clear from the above that Quiverwing Duck’s Gos died not because she wasn’t ready or because her dad din’t train her.. but because , like MOST of the heroes above.. she died a hero saving the world.  And the show recognizes this even if it doen’t mention the death because the show has to have limits and it was the early 90′s, wiht Darkwing’s fears also being that she’s growing up. He knows sh’es capable of this.. he’s just tearful she’s growing up.. and that she could be gone. It puts his overprotectiveness from other episodes in a much more understandable light, and makes it clear that while it comes from a good place it’s not really healthy: As the episode shows, Gosalyn thinks ALL he sees of her is a baby to be coddled and protected and not as her own person, and while he’s right to protect her.. he’s gone so far in it and in dismisisng her again, and again AND AGAIN, that he’s given the poor girl a complex. Leaping into danger alone isn’t the answer.. but when we get to the climax of the episode you can see why it’s gotten this bad. It’s suprisingly layred for what’s normally a pretty simple character conlficts. Here there’s no easy answer and even while by the end Darkwing’s accepted she’ll be a hero someday and both earnestly apologize, ther’es no real resolution. And sometimes.. that’s okay. It’s something they could’ve revisited had the series gone on and we did get at least one sequel episode at least and the comics do explore the issue of gosalyn being a kid hero and drake’s overprotectiness, with his issues there being why he retired and ended up badly straining his relationhip with gosalyn and ending , for a while, his friendship with launchpad and relationsihp with morgan as well as his costumed career. But obviously as I said we’ll get to that another day. But as an episode.. this one is truly excellent and one of the best the series put out, with plenty of humor but the more complicated dynamics at play BUILT on what we’ve seen before, including Gos rightfuly supsecting dakwing’s against her due to his own ego at points, are what elevate it to the series best. So how’d they follow it up?

Paint Misbehavin:

This one’s in an awkard middle place, where it’s FAR better than the previous splatter Phoenix Episode but not as good as “The Quiverwing Quack”. Still it’s a pretty fun episode all together.  So the main plot is that Darkwing and Gosalyn are at cross purposes because Darkwing is overshadowed by Gosalyn, in this case at the local comic con where Gosalyn, returning to her Quiverwing Quack guise, is the big new thing while Darkwing’s practically ignored. 

Yeah no way around it this is a rehash of “Whiffle While You Work”, same basic conflict, just with suprheroing instead of a video game. So naturally at first it annoyed me especially since they had a debate over who was better, Darkwing’s old traditional hero or Gosalyn’s new very 90′s hero. This.. goes about nowhere and is just cringe inducing for me as a comics fan, whose not against 90′s characters but acknolsges the vast majority got better LATER under new writers, with the exception of some such as superboy, steel, kyle rayner and impulse, who were fresh out of the package.  Thankfully.. the episode pushes past this and it ends up being a better version of Whiffle While You Work, as Drake isn’t as overbearingly obnoxious as he was there: Here Gosalyn is just as egotsitical, at one point trying to lead him away from a crime scene, and it’s only when they finally work as a team that they become unstoppable. It does say something though that Darkwing has genuinely grown as his objection is pure ego instead of overprotectivness like last time and he willingly lets her tag along even if he’s trying to show her up. It’s not the BEST conflict, and it ends with egos clashing, but while this part of the episode is recycled.. at least it’s recycling an episode that genuinely wasted the idea and using it better. Darkwing being jealous here is FAR more understandable as he’s been a hero far longer and while his ego is way too big for his head, it’s understandble to be a big pissy, and agian he dosen’t go nearly as far in how he treats gosalyn. He just wants to show up his own daughter and he’s shown as fully wrong for this. Not great but far better than before.  What IS great and what makes this episode fun, is Splatter Phoenix, whose even better than last time. I attribute this to the change in voice actors. While Dani Staahl was excellent.. her replacment is far better and far more notable. It’s SCTV’s andrea martin... who i’m realizing most of you have probably never heard of. 

Or know what  SCTV is. It was before both our times trust me: it was an early 80′s sketch comedy show that had a unique premise as the sketches were all programs for a fictional tv station, and there’d often be wraparounds about what was going on at the station that oftne led to sketches or impacted them: From dealing with sponser issues brought on by the Moral Majority, aliens, the russians hyjacking their signal, and forging checks from Fred Willard’s account, yes that was a plot and yes he was indeed a guest star, there was no end to the number of shenanigans in and out of program. IT was really good stuff with an all star cast: John Candy, Rick Moranis, Dave Thomas, Cathrine O’Hara, Eugene Levy, Joe Flarhety, Martin Short, and of course Martin. Even Harold Ramis was on the show for it’s first season. It was just a damn good time and if you can find the dvd’s or clips on youtube I recommend it.  My point is Martin is vastly underated and really deserves better than she’s gotten, and this eps proves it as her energy really adds to Splatter’s astetic and really fits the show like a glove and it’s a shame the show ended shortly after this episode, as it would’ve been nice to see her return in the role. But for a one shot she’s UTTERLY awesome, and Splatter gets to do far more this time as her brush has now expanded to be able to create, so we get helicopter cats, pumpkin dogs, a pink gorilla with a toaster for a head and when told superheroes always win she creates her own, absract man, with a hand for a head and a weird body and I just want to see more of him. He even skips off with Launchpad’s faivorie hero, bascally mr rodgers as a weasel, after launchpad draws the guy in. I want to see this gay couple fight crime with love and existetaalism dammit!

But yeah she’s just fun, as is her vandalism of various art works including making the dogs playing poker into skeletons.. which I now want a picture of for my room because that is nice. SHe also brings back the art shitfts from before in little ways, transforming darkwing into abstract art and to blocky art at diffrent points with her brush. And that’s what puts this episode over the other: The creativity is still there but without the whole “Honker being gaslighted” plot that I still hate to this very second, it’s allowed to be fun and fancy free and with Splatter out in the open she’s allowed to get a LOT more ambitious and thus the writers and martin get to have a LOT more fun with the gimmick. 

So while I do feel the episode’s a bit crowded, as they try to cram in both splatter phoenix and this super feud between family into the same space and both episodes would’ve been better served seperatley, i’ts so fun with clever use of the magic brush by our heroes and what not I can’t help but love it. I don’t love the climax though as splatter gets turpentine spilled on her by gosalyny and .. melts for some reason. Because she’s made of paint now even though that was never a thing before? Not to mention the fact our heroes just killed a person...

So yeah the ending’s a bit wonky but it’s a fun episode with the return of a great villian, a decent of played out main conflict and some great gags and fights in it. All in all i’m glad I got comissioned for this one and finally tackled it. Good stuff.  So that does it for this. We’ll be back to darkwing next week just in time for valentine’s day.. and back with Negaduck too. Until then it’s been a pleasure. 

[rhyolight]

Ok, so Ben and Jeff plan to prank Slenderman, but it goes horribly wrong. By that I mean like either slender finds out, or they do something like accidentally set something on fire.... or both! What do you imagine would happen? Also what kind of prank would they plan? -ゆう

This one was great fun to write. The style may be a bit different than usual, as I have helped with the writing, so this piece is a mix of Rhyo’s style and mine. We hope you enjoy it! 

      When it came to pranks, few would go as far as Ben and Jeff often did. Of course, one might expect that they should be mature, but alas, this was not the case. 

      While intelligent, Ben remained childish at heart, and maturity, to put it simply, was not Jeff’s strong suit. This meant that they would often come up with elaborate schemes, sometimes they worked beautifully, and everyone could appreciate a good laugh, but more often than not, things were carried too far, or were simply downright dangerous to begin with. The two had a knack for screwing up even the most simple and flawless of plans, they had been banned from even setting foot in the kitchen a few years prior. 

      So of course, when they got it into their heads that they should prank Slender, they made sure to keep it quite. Ben could keep a secret, that much was evident, but even Jeff, with his loud mouth that would blurt out whatever came to mind kept quiet, after all, they didn’t want the others to spoil their fun. 

      Perhaps if they had done something simple, perhaps if they had followed the rules, all of this could have been avoided. But no, they couldn’t settle for simple, after all, simple pranks were for simple people. They didn’t mean to, of course, they didn’t want things to end this way. Perhaps, they would later argue, if they had been given reasons instead of rules this never would have happened in the first place, but who could have expected this? 

      Of course, Slender had been selected as their target. Sure, he would be angry, but they loved to prank him. It was more fun, as it was much harder. They knew what one of Slender’s most famous traits was, his ability to watch others despite his lacking a pair of eyes, but unlike the general population, they knew why he was so skilled when it came to observation. They had seen it many times before themselves, the way he picked up the slight vibrations created by disturbances, allowing him to detect movement and hear sound with perfect clarity. 

      Normally this made it hard to plan, as he could pick up their whispers, but this time, they would use this to their advantage. And surprisingly, they had managed to work out their plan without being caught. So clearly it wasn’t their fault, after all, wasn’t it Slender’s responsibility to know what they were up to? And it wasn’t supposed to be flammable, flour went in the oven all the time and nothing bad ever happened. 

      Really, perhaps of they had been warned properly, Slender’s head would not be on fire. They had thought that this argument was flawless, but Slender, shaking with rage as he towered above them, flames erupting from his skin, was of a mind that their argument was dumb. Although perhaps the phrasing was a bit less polite. 

      By now, dear reader, I’m sure you’re dying to know what had happened. I could have started at the beginning, shown you the way they had slunk around the house, the weeks it took to plan, but no, this story starts in the middle. It could continue from the middle as well, perhaps I share with you what obscenities Slender screamed at the pair, leaving the true cause of his anger a mystery. Or what if the story just ended here? 

      But that’s enough putting it off, by now you must have grown impatient. So I suppose, if you truly wanted to know, I could let you in on the secret. 

      As I’m sure you are well aware, the best pranks are the ones that create true confusion, a sense of being baffled, rendering oneself unable to fully comprehend the situation. This was what they hoped to aim for, and it had seemed harmless enough. The idea was to create so much movement and change that Slender would not be able to process everything, this achieving the goal. 

      The plan had been to drag the leaf blower, and yes, they were banned from touching that too, but rules are meant to be broken, inside in order to blow loose flour throughout the room. And it had gone perfectly, that is, until everything exploded. 

      See, what they did not realize was that if the right amount of flour dust happens to fly though the air, it has a nasty habit of spontaneous combustion. And as they had blown the flour directly towards Slender, an unfortunate side effect was that he happened to catch fire. 

      The curtains had ignited as well, but never mind that, for curtains do not yell angrily. 

      Everyone was startled, particularly Jeff, as his fear of fire was common knowledge. And having Slenderman standing over him, bellowing with rage as flames crackled along his skin did not help in the slightest. 

      Ben should have felt remorseful, or slightly guilty at the least, but adrenaline was pushing him forwards, and he tossed more flour into the air. The leaf blower skidded across the floor as Jeff dropped it with a shriek, beating at the air with his hands as if warding off a swarm of insects. 

      Luckily for Jeff and Slender, and unfortunately for Ben, Toby was able to help. He had been outside with Sally, using the hose to make a giant mud pit when he heard the commotion. He had run over with the hose, smashing through the window with reckless abandon as water sprayed everywhere. Ben, angry about the fact that he was now soaked, proceeded to yell as loudly as he could while stomping his feet. He may have been a ghost, but he still knew how to throw a tantrum. 

      Blood dripped from Toby’s face, swirls of crimson red spiraling through the puddles on the floor, although he didn’t notice. He grinned, blood dripping everywhere, shattered glass protruding from his face, yet all he felt was proud of himself for saving the day. 

      Then the second fire started. How did another fire start? You might ask, the room was soaking wet, there wasn’t an open flame in sight, but a problem persisted. 

      See, there had been no strategy to Toby’s plan to extinguish Slender, and the extension cord that brought power to the now abandoned leaf blower now sat in a pool of water. 

      They all watched in horror as oil leached from the piece of discarded machinery, creating greasy swirls in the water. Sparks flew, quickly igniting and racing along the surface of the water. 

      In fact, had Tim not burst in with a fire extinguisher, all might have perished. Well, except for Ben, he is a ghost after all, and nobody was quite sure if Slender could die or not. 

      Still, his calm was impressive, though he was used to dealing with the aftermath of Ben and Jeff’s tricks. 

      No major casualties were suffered, although Toby did need to have the glass removed from his face, but he didn’t put up a fuss, what would be the point? He couldn’t feel it anyways. 

      And although Jeff and Ben did act sorry, they still snickered in the passing weeks when they saw Slender walk by, his head, normally a flawless shade of white, now stained black. 

[paladin-lynx]

SquipJere Week 2020, Day 4: Mr. Roboto

@squipjerebmc’s SquipJere Week 2020 Day 4: Mr. Roboto

Ships Involved: The SQUIP x Jeremy Heere (Technical Difficulties/Squipemy/Squeremy/JereSquip/SquipJere)

Setting: Canonverse, set in the time interval between “Loser Geek Whatever” and “Halloween”.

Trigger/Content Warnings: None

Jeremy had never been one to ‘bask in the limelight,’ as they said. He wasn’t exactly content to stay on the sidelines for his entire life like Michael was, but he didn’t need to be the center of attention. It would just be kind of nice to be looked at by someone other than his best friend since kindergarten or bullies searching for a punching bag.

But he had to admit, after his first real hangout with the ‘cool kids’ had been a success, he felt like a movie star. All of the eyes on him as he’d mastered the dancing game at Dave & Buster’s had been somewhat overwhelming at first, but he’d quickly adjusted and it just felt good to be recognized, even if it was for something that he technically hadn’t achieved on his own. But even Rich, who without a doubt knew how Jeremy had danced like he was a professional to a song he didn’t even know that well on the highest difficulty on some obscure music game, had praised him and let him have his brief moment of fame.

But it was enough attention to satisfy him for a week or more and as keyed up as he was from all the interaction, it felt nice to be home. The entire scene kept replaying itself in his head – whether that was because of him or because it was the SQUIP’s silent way of saying ‘look how well you did,’ he wasn’t completely sure – and he had a bit of a skip in his step as he walked into the house. His father hadn’t even seemed to notice he was gone so there was no way he’d noticed that Jeremy had taken the car.

The rest of the Saturday passed without much fanfare, and soon enough it was Sunday. Sundays were usually Jeremy’s day to buckle down and get his homework done, and he usually didn’t look forward to it. When he didn’t want to get up from bed, the SQUIP lightly prodded at him until he did, teasing him for his bedhead and telling him that it was sure it would be a productive day.

Jeremy had never really liked doing homework. The one exception was when he was given books to read, although that heavily depended on the book. However, ever since getting the SQUIP, he hadn’t gotten much more enthusiastic about doing schoolwork but he found it much easier to focus. He knew for a fact that was because of the SQUIP’s influence – or at least, it had definitely started that way and now Jeremy wondered if maybe his focus was better because his mind had been properly trained.

And so after scarfing down a bowl of cereal – the SQUIP had been intent on him having three meals a day, something Jeremy hadn’t exactly been great about before considering he opted to skip breakfast ninety-five percent of the time – he settled in at his desk to start on the one subject that was the bane of his existence: math. Michael had always been the one who was better with numbers while Jeremy was better with words. Jeremy had been in the drama club when he was in elementary school and for part of middle school, although he never had any roles that were too notable, but it was enough to satisfy him. His adoration of Christine had only bolstered his love of theater. He’d even debated a few times over the course of his short life trying to write poetry or songs, but he’d never gotten into the right mindset for it. He doubted he’d be good at it, anyway.

But now he had the SQUIP which, as it had so proudly declared the first day he’d gotten it, was made of math. There were certain things the SQUIP would do for him, but homework wasn’t one of them. It would stand by as Jeremy worked, ready to assist, but it would never just give him the answers. It would walk him through the problems or prompts to make sure he understood how to find the solution, and of course because the SQUIP was in his brain, Jeremy would find himself understanding even if he had initially found himself lost as the SQUIP rattled off information.

And so he sat at his desk and got to work – normally he’d end up hunched over in his chair, but thanks yet again to the SQUIP that was no longer the case – furrowing his brow as he started on the various problems. The SQUIP was helping him raise his grades but he still had to put in the effort himself, because if he was suddenly a prodigy in every subject, there would definitely be some eyebrows raised in his direction. So he needed to do well, but not too well, kind of like how he hadn’t gotten a perfect score back at Dave & Buster’s. There was a balance to these things, wherein the SQUIP would step in and hold his hand to lead him down the right path until Jeremy learned well enough to see the way on his own.

Jeremy usually waited until he got through all the problems he could do on his own before he asked for help, almost like he was still a little kid going to ask his parents if they could assist him. Then again, the SQUIP would always be there as soon as he so much as thought that he might not be able to figure something out on his own. No embarrassing scurrying down to the kitchen necessary – although it was still a bit embarrassing to need help at all.

And to his pleasant surprise, he was actually getting through most of the assigned problems relatively quickly. Sure, there were a couple that had him scratching his head for a few minutes, but it just took a quick flip through his notes – those were getting neater and better organized, too – for him to come to a realization. He might actually be able to have some free time on this Sunday instead of spending the whole day besides meals and bathroom breaks sitting at his desk and working.

He was so absorbed in his work – what a rarity – that he almost missed that there was sound in the room other than the scratching of his pencil against his notebook. When he finally noticed it, he looked up with his brow creased, confused. It almost sounded like humming, but he was pretty sure that even if his dad sang in the shower, it wouldn’t reach all the way through the closed door.

That was when he turned to see the SQUIP standing on the other side of the room, back facing him. It had a few translucent blue screens floating around it, each displaying various numbers and data that Jeremy could never even hope to understand, and it was tapping its chin as it looked over everything. Jeremy knew that the visuals were just to fit his personal aesthetics and to give him something to look at as the SQUIP interacted with him so his brain wasn’t left utterly baffled, but he still couldn’t help feeling intrigued.

Especially when he realized that his SQUIP was, in fact, humming as it went about its business.

Of course, as soon as Jeremy realized, the sound stopped and the screens fizzled away as the SQUIP looked over its shoulder. “What? You should be doing your homework.”

“You were humming,” was all Jeremy managed to say, realizing after a heartbeat how stupid it sounded to state the obvious.

However, the SQUIP merely blinked at him, turning around to properly face him, arms crossing against its chest. “I was not.”

“Wh—You were!” Jeremy protested. “I heard it.”

“Perhaps you were humming to yourself as you worked?”

“No way, I don’t hum when I work. Especially not when I’m doing math.”

The SQUIP seemed to bite back a smile at that and instead huffed. “Everything I do in this physical manifestation, Jeremy, has a purpose. There would be no reason for me be humming at this moment, so therefore I was not humming.”

Jeremy’s eyebrows furrowed. “But you were. I heard you. I know my brain is fucked up, but it isn’t so bad that I’m imagining humming. I even know the song. It was ‘Mr. Roboto’ by, uh…erm…shit…”

“Styx,” the SQUIP interrupted, although it didn’t seem entirely pleased to be giving Jeremy evidence against its argument.

“Yeah, Styx! It played at one point in Dave & Buster’s yesterday. When Jake and Brooke were doing the basketball game thingy.”

The SQUIP scowled at him. “Jeremy, I wasn’t humming. That would be illogical. Why would I carry out such a pointless act?”

Jeremy blinked, before shrugging. “I dunno. For fun? You’re an A.I., after all, so you have things that you like to do even if you don’t need to do them…right?”

He remembered the SQUIP telling him just a few days ago that it was impossible for it to ever be at a loss. But the SQUIP right now looked just a bit baffled at Jeremy’s explanation. “I…suppose that might be true. Have I done anything else like that?”

Jeremy thought for a moment. “You looked like you were having fun yesterday when we were playing games with everyone. Maybe it was just you helping me, but I think you were getting something out of it, too. Maybe the happy chemicals in my brain were affecting you or something.”

The SQUIP snorted. “It doesn’t work that way, Jeremy. But…you may be onto something.” It tilted its head, and Jeremy wondered what exactly it was processing. But it spoke again just a few moments later: “It seems that I was, in fact, humming. It was just a…mindless action. I didn’t even seem to realize myself that I was doing it.”

“Well, you told me that with every interaction, you learn and evolve,” Jeremy replied. “So maybe because you’re poking around at me less, you’re starting to realize there are things that you like to do? And that song stuck with you from yesterday.” He smiled. “Kind of fitting, honestly.”

“I’m not a robot, Jeremy. I’m a supercomputer.”

“Oh, you know what I meant!”

The SQUIP chuckled softly, reaching up to push its hair back, even though Jeremy was pretty sure it was already perfectly in place as it always was. “…This is certainly an interesting development. I’ll have to look more into it.”

Jeremy frowned. “I know you’re all about numbers and results and stuff, but…can’t you just enjoy it and not try to dig in and find a reason behind it?”

The SQUIP raised an eyebrow and tipped its head to one side as it looked at him. “I’m programmed to delve into situations and analyze how they come to be and what results may come from them. That includes how my own code functions and grows.”

Jeremy sighed, shrugging and turning back to his desk. “You do you, I guess. Just…I dunno, I have time when I’m not working and you don’t have to worry about me. So you could find your own thing to do.”

The SQUIP appeared beside him, still looking thoughtful. “You do realize I’m in your head, right? I can’t exactly decide to meander off and go attend some crazy rave.”

Jeremy smiled sideways at him. “Maybe you can meet up with Rich’s SQUIP and have a wild party or something in cyberspace. Or you could sync with some of my game systems and run around in them. I think you secretly liked being a little hamster.”

“I did not,” it protested and Jeremy only grinned more when he felt indignant static trail down his spine. The SQUIP tutted at him and turned away. “…I’ll consider looking into doing activities that don’t align with my assignment to you. It could prove to be an interesting experiment.”

“Uh huh.”

Jeremy left it at that and got back to his homework, although he was pretty sure he wasn’t focusing quite as well as before. Was it really that strange that the SQUIP had been humming? It seemed to do a lot of things that were a bit more extra than necessary – such as that little kiss to the back of Jeremy’s hand just the day before, but Jeremy was trying not to linger on that too much because it made his stomach feel funny – but it had always explained it away as being for Jeremy’s sake. But Jeremy was starting to wonder if that was just the SQUIP trying to convince itself that everything it did had a reason behind it and that it wasn’t just doing something for the sake of doing it like a stupid human would. A SQUIP was built to learn so that it could improve itself, and it would only see something as harmless as humming a tune as it worked as a distraction or even a downgrade.

But after Jeremy had eaten dinner and returned to his room to move on to his history homework, he blinked up as he once again heard the unmistakable humming. He looked over to see the SQUIP sitting on his bed, its eyes closed and expression contemplative as it almost hesitantly hummed out the familiar notes of ‘Mr. Roboto,’ albeit slower than the actual song. But as the minutes passed, the sound got more confident and Jeremy swore he even saw a smile.

“You have a nice voice,” he complimented after a bit.

“Just because someone can carry a tune while humming doesn’t mean they can sing well, Jeremy,” was the reply he got.

But when Jeremy lay down to sleep that night, nestled under the covers, he could see the gentle tell-tale glow of the SQUIP as it sat down on the edge of the bed, just as it had that first night it had activated. It ran its fingers through Jeremy’s hair, slow and soothing, and Jeremy tipped his head slightly up into the touch as he felt himself start to drift off.

And right before he fell asleep, he thought he heard a quiet voice singing:

“Everything about you is going to be wonderful…”

[multi-fandom--writings]

Lilac

George X Reader Fem! House Neutral 

Word Count: 800 

“Y’know George, i never really understood why you wanted to be friends with me.” you said as if it was a normal thing to say. Which for you it wasn’t, you were very honest about your feelings with people you cared about. 

“Y/n seriously. This again” he rolled his eyes but nonetheless moved to sit next to you. “I don’t understand why you doubt yourself so much-” 

You continued to draw the flower that you picked and had set between your knees that were also holding up your sketchbook “-It’s not that i doubt myself George. It’s that I'm bored. I mean look at us right now. I’ve been our here for hours, drawing stupid little things to pass the time. While Fred is someone else most likely planning his next prank on someone. Instead of you being with him and doing fun stuff, you decided for whatever reason to come sit out here with me. You haven’t even been doing anything George, you’re either staring at me - from a very unflattering angle might i add” You finally glanced at him when you said this and noticed he looked unimpressed with what you were telling him “how could that possibly be fun? Because it’s not. How you’ve been able to not whine and complain about it baffles me, but regardless you’re bored George. Why? Because your out here with me-” 

He let out a loud groan, completely interrupting you but you just shook your head with a small smile on your face before continuing “It’s alright Georgie, believe it or not, i don’t mind being boring. It’s fun to me.” With this you simply continued your little sketch of the Lilac placed between your knees. You hadn’t just picked a random flower, you never did. Each flower had a meaning so when you would pick flowers, you would choose ones that match how you were feeling that day. 

You didn’t exactly need a response from him, you simply wanted to get the feeling from your brain because it had been bothering you since the moment he laid down next to you. He let out a sigh before talking in a gentle voice “You’re not boring y/n. Even if you were, I would love to be boring with you. But really y/n...I love spending time with you. How could i be bored when i get to watch you make all those cute faces when you draw!” 

“I do not make faces-” He let out a loud laugh and shook his head at you 

“You could not be more wrong y/n! Your nose gets all scrunched up whenever you erase something, you bite your lip whenever you’re extra focused, but when you’ve done something you really like it’s the most adorable thing ever! The look you get is just...Godric it’s so cute!” You couldn’t help but blush deeply at his words, this did not go unnoticed  “Would you look at that. Y/n you’re nearly the color of the flower” 

You playfully smacked him in the arm “I’ll have you know that i do not look like the flower George! It’s purple!” You had nearly finished drawing but decided you would stop there. You were both quiet for a moment before you spoke softly “Do you know what the flower means Georgie?” you were examining the flower between your fingers “This one-” you handed him the flower “is for love, and passion.” In the mere seconds after handing him the flower, it felt like the atmosphere had changed completely. “That's why i chose it today...because of you” 

He didn’t say anything, he just stared at you. The expression on his face was one you had only seen come from him. You didn’t quite know what it was, but you would find him looking at you like that sometimes. The two of you sat there, staring at each other for what felt like centuries. It felt like nothing mattered but the two of you. As if nothing else existed, just the two of you. “George” you said in such a low voice that you weren’t sure if he had heard you. “George...kiss me” 

He slowly moved his hand to cup your face, pulling you close as he leaned in. The moment your lips touched it was like butterflies were surrounding you, you felt like you were on the clouds. His lips matched perfectly with yours. He moved his hand down to your wait, sending a shiver up your spine. As if acting on instinct, you moved your arm around his neck, your fingers finding his hair. You pulled away and saw that he had a grin plastered on his face “Merlin you have no idea how long i’ve wanted to do that.”