#I’M RATTLING MY CAGE DO YOU GET IT!??!???
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No thoughts only thanatos being gentle with souls and giving mort to the children taken too early and letting shades say goodbye to their families and reuniting friends in the afterlife and looking fondly upon mortals as a shepherd would his flock of sheep
#HELLO YES I HAVE JUST GOTTEN A NEW FIC IDEA#WHOA BOY I AM FEELING THINGS LADS#I’ve got a name for it and everything#mmmmmm very little reading is gonna happen on my part tonight I am TOO BUSY WRITING#he’s the god of *gentle* death of COURSE he cares for us when we need it most#I’M RATTLING MY CAGE DO YOU GET IT!??!???#hades game#thanatos#thanatos hades#grrrrhrgthrmbahgrhagrgs
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Another fabulous video from my friend Veil on X of our Godking II drinking they truly got the holy grail of II content I think heheh
@inv3ga check it
#I am so very normal about this#he turns awayyyy#but ahhhhh#he’s like#this is gonna make them insane#imma do it#plus I’m thirsty so win win#hahaha#or maybe he didn’t even think about it#either way#rattling the bars of my cage#veil just replied to me#“the self control not to squeal as I was filming!! 😭🪦#I’m feel that#I had to stop myself from squealing watching it#uggghh he’s soooooo#sleep token#sleep token worship#sleep token band#sleep token ii#ii when I get you oooo#stoned rae
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good news!! i am 25% of the way done with the first draft of my portfolio!! (read: partway through like 50 pages of intensely jargon driven mini essays that are each evaluated by several arcane and strangely worded rubrics)
bad news!! the intense euphoria of nearly being at the point where i can Finally take a break and do what i want without the stress of deadlines hanging over me for the first time in nearly a year paired with the soul-crushing reality of needing to finish the remaining 75% of this project is giving me such intense waves of anxiety and nausea that it is actively preventing me from working on more of the project
#want to scream and yell and bite and rattle the bars of my cage like LET ME OUT!!!!!#LET ME OUUUUUUUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!#with any luck though i will Never have to do this again#unless it gets kicked back at me by the evaluators in which case i’m kind of screwed#which doesn’t help my stress levels#writing these essays feels like those mini games in mario where you have to trace a path that disappears after the first few seconds#where i spend a long and tedious time on it and then i check the rubric and i’m like#way off#and have to go back and revise it#because these things are sooooooo dependent on shades of nuance it’s unreal#they’re long ass prompts with incredibly specific keywords and no real indication of what exactly they want#but then you look back at something you’ve written and go AH JESUS FUCK……..#because you identified and described instead of explaining#and also you focused on Your Process instead of What Made You Choose Your Process#it’s insane.
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The way I only managed to do 1.5 out of the 6 things I needed to do for school this weekend
#I’m not doing well tbh the more stressful the looming deadlines get the more overwhelmed I get the more I can’t focus and get absorbed in#impulsive distractions bc my brain is desperately and frantically avoiding the stress#I know I’m making poor choices with my time I just truly cannot stop myself from making them#there is my academic self locked in a cage rattling the bars and screaming and then the other hobbies version of myself is piloting my body#while fandom/day dream version of me is nodding approvingly and pushing play on another YouTube video while my hands crochet etc#someday I will get evaluated for you know
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trying to get this blog up is making me feel like whatever part of michael might have been semi conscious when ennard took him over or whatever the fuck
#you know . rattling the bars of my cage DHGDJD#IM NOT A FUCKING ROBOT.....I WANT TO WRITE MY SCRUNKLY#i will be waiting for the cheezbot stamp of approval... i also have a queue to set up that'll hopefully get my main tags out at least#im too afraid to do a tag drop after getting got within the hour of it last time lmao#i swear i will get the url i was actually gonna use back... one of these days......#⁂ ・゚: i was looking for a job‚ and then i found a job‚ and heaven knows i’m miserable now ➛ ooc
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I LOVE YOU PAST MILO -current Milo nauseas head in a sparkling clean toilet I cleaned literally a half hour ago and then got too high while celebrating how clean it looked and feel sick now😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
#but yipppee sparkly clean. gonna put a little sticky toilet gel thing on the inside while I’m in here#maybe throw up if another nausea wave comes before I can stand up 😭#I had too much cereal and a lot of water at once and like. yuck yuck yuck I feel yucky high on the floor yucky I wish I was normal I need to#back off of weed a little to become a real person but also. I’d rather dig my own grave and bury myself in it alive than work a real job#like. fuckkkkkk I want to cry. fuck retail fuck fuck fuck I’m a failure wahhhhhhh I cant even handle beginner jobs#rattling the bars of my cage screaming crying throwing up why am I alive waahhhhhh okay nvm that’s too far it’s not that bad I’m chilling#the toilet is clean! look at the bright side. my therapist when I talked about like my mom maybe wanting to set a goal for working like a#certain amount of doordash hours and my therapists number she came up with was three hours and I was so happy like. she gets it. I am#exhausted just existing and she was like hmm you should work three hours a week. like. at most.#love her so much. it was probably a mistake but also. keeping it in my brain forever#imagine a three hour work week being backed up by my therapist to my mom like haha my therapist said I only HAVE to do three hours#god three hours still feels like a lot rn#like two weeks ago I dropped a salad in a tight packed restaurant and everyone watched me drop it and then walk back to the kitchen and wait#for them to make a salad so I could leave and fucking deliver the food and it was so embarassing and I haven’t done a single order since#then bc I get so anxious that I just exit the app if I don’t get an order like immediately which I haven’t yet so no orders.#I just get high. too high. and admire my cleaning work. it’s nice. I have to do the bathroom floor still. dog hair. dust. brother beard hair#my hair and bleach specks. I need to clean the bathroom fr. I’m excited I’m redecorating the bathroom in my mind and it’s giving me#motivation to clean it and I want to work more dooordash shifts (when I’m not this high) to save moneys to update my room and the bathroom#a little before the summer. just. replace air matress bc it’s low key a trigger now. so that’s fun. so buy a futon or smthing. and update#the bathroom into a thing that I like in my extra Milo type way. while making room for three ppl to share one bathroom. bc. it’s small#small bathroom for sure. but I’ll get it lookin good. add some cute decorations. maybe a candle or two. an incense thing for when I tak bath#slay. slay. building my dream bathroom in my mind and also. my Amazon wishlist land. and Pinterest land. I love making lists of things.
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thinking about theo glaring at you while you argue with him, pouting and crossing your arms about something so trivial. you know that you’re making a scene in front of all your friends, but you didn’t care one bit. this is what theo gets for telling you no.
theo never told you no. you were his pampered little princess, so used to getting his affection and attention any time you wanted it. but now, he was making you wait until after quidditch practice? that wouldn’t do.
so, you put on your tightest crop top and shortest skirt, making a show of chatting up fred weasley out on the field. theo spotted you right away, his jaw clenching as you threw your head back and laughed at whatever that redheaded twat said. it wasn’t long before theo landed beside you, discarding his broom on the grass like it wasn't worth a couple hundred galleons.
your boyfriend shoved fred out of the way and loomed over you. “you’re playing a dangerous game, principessa.”
you huffed, tossing your hair over your shoulder. “you’re the one playing games, theo. fred was only keeping me company because you’re too busy practicing to pay attention to your girlfriend.”
“you’re being a fucking brat and you know it.”
“so?” you challenged, tilting your chin up to glare at him. “what are you going to do about it, theo?”
the taunt didn’t sit well with your boyfriend. without a word, theo dragged you underneath the stands, pressing you against the wooden poles. you squirmed as he caged you in, squeezing your thighs together as theo yanked you by the hair. you whined, pupils dilating from how turned on you were.
“you wanted my attention,” theo growled as his fingers wrapped around your throat. “now you’ve got it.”
you smirked in return, having gotten exactly what you wanted. theo was incensed at the sight of your gloating. “don’t look so smug, bella. i’m going to make you pay for your attitude.”
theo traced your jaw before reeling back and smacking your cheek. you could already see the red handprint bruising your face. the force of it stunned you, but more importantly, it made your core ache, your pussy throbbing and aching for him. your boyfriend smirked, knowing he had the upper hand now.
“open,” he commanded.
you kept your eyes on him as you parted your lips, eagerly awaiting his punishment. theo spit into your open mouth, wet and messy as he claimed you with the degrading gesture.
“swallow,” theo said simply.
shivering at the show of dominance, you did as you were told. theo’s eyes darkened with lust, filled with a hunger that you’ve never seen from him before.
“that’s what I fucking thought.”
theo unbuckled his pants, dropping them around his ankles before roughly shoving your skirt up your waist. your boyfriend gave no warning before he thrusted his cock into your pussy, making you gasp at the sudden stretch. you wrapped your legs around his waist, moaning as he fucked you roughly against the wood.
“not so bratty now, hm?” theo taunted with a dark chuckle as you whimpered in his ear. you felt dazed as his balls slapped against your ass, rattling your brain from how hard he fucked you. “all that talk and yet you’re bouncing on my cock, fucked dumb and speechless. how pathetic.”
“please, theo — need more —“
“please,” theo said mockingly. “that’s all you had to say, principessa. but you don’t seem to have any manners, do you? so used to me giving you everything you want. maybe i’ve spoiled you too much. you have to learn that some things need to be earned.”
theo pulled out suddenly, making you whine. he shot you a warning look before bringing you to your knees. the carnality written all over his handsome face only made you want him that much more.
“now suck my cock like the good little whore you are and i’ll think about letting you cum.”
#someone call a fucking ambulance#theodore nott#theo nott#theo nott smut#theodore nott smut#theo nott x reader#theo nott x you#theo nott x y/n#theodore nott x you#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott x y/n
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pulling your face close, wanting the inmost
synopsis: its been three years since minjeong left y/n waiting at the altar. throughout it all, jimin comes along.
w/c: 4.5k+
warnings: angst, blood (you’re a doctor), fluff. winter x you x karina
a/n: do you think my sleepless nights will make me insane? be honest. also meant to be really short but got carried away
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the train rattled as it sped through the early seoul morning, its harsh fluorescent lights bouncing off the windows and flickering faintly above you; hunched in the corner, staring blankly at the window; your scrubs noticeably wrinkled from the rushed way you’d thrown them on.
the person in the reflection was unrecognisable: hollow cheeks and dark circles etched like shadows beneath tired eyes — you were gaunt, tired; a reminder that the polished version of yourself, the one that used to smile, laugh and plan for a future, was long gone.
it screeched to a halt, jerking you out of whatever trance you were just in. as everyone else stood from their seats, you grabbed your bag and sighed; the weight of the day ahead pressing down on your shoulders.
your fingers tapped absently on your thigh as it slowed down, the doors automatically sliding open and you filed out with the rest of the crowd while keeping your head low.
the walk to the hospital from here wasn’t far, but you stopped at the station exit, digging a cigarette from your pocket. just one. it wasn’t a habit you were proud of, but it helped, even if only for a moment.
your hands trembled as you lit it and the first drag stung your lungs in a way that briefly drowned out everything else.
the memories clawed their way in anyway.
three years. it had been three years since minjeong walked out of your life without a word. she didn’t show up on the day that was supposed to mark your forever. no note. no call.
nothing but an empty altar and the stares of everyone you’d gathered to celebrate a love that, you’d come to realise, wasn’t as mutual as you believed.
it wasn’t hard to figure out what had happened.
mingyu came back into the picture. you had seen the rumours floating around online weeks before the wedding, fans gushing over how they spotted him and minjeong leaving the same restaurant; smiling like they used to in the good old days.
you asked her about it once, casually, your voice steady even though your heart raced. “did you see mingyu recently?”
she’d looked at you then, her expression unreadable, and shrugged. “it was just a friendly dinner. nothing to worry about.”
and like the fool you were, you believed her.
you exhaled sharply, watching the smoke curl into the crisp morning air. the morning rush of people already blurring into nothingness.
another day. another shift. another chance to bury yourself in the monotony of work. shaking your head, you snuffed the cigarette under your heel and started walking.
asan medical center loomed ahead, its sterile walls a familiar cage. work was your only escape now. it was ironic, really — the same place where you met her, where your love story began, was now the place you buried yourself to forget her.
by the time you arrived, you instantly slipped into your usual routine: quiet, focused and distant. the staff knew you as a good doctor — reliable, efficient and calm under pressure, but they also knew you as someone impossible to get close to.
“morning y/n,” jiwoo greeted as she walked into the staff room, her tone overly chipper. she was one of the few residents who still tried to engage with you, even though your responses were always curt.
“morning,” you mumbled, not bothering to look up as you stirred a spoonful of sugar into your coffee.
“how was your day off?”
“fine,” you said shortly. “just stayed home.”
she frowned. “you should go out sometime. have fun. meet people.”
“i’m fine,” you shook your head, taking a sip of the still bitter liquid. “i love my dog’s company.”
she hesitated, clearly wanting to say more, but eventually gave up as her shoulders slouched. “let me know if you ever want to hang out sometime, yeah? perhaps, you can even bring rome around.”
you nodded, not really hearing her. the truth was, you didn’t want to talk. not to her, not to anyone. talking meant opening up, and opening up meant risking another heartbreak. you couldn’t do it again.
three years ago, you would’ve been a different person — someone who laughed easily, loved deeply and believed in forever.
today, you were someone who stood in front of a room full of people, trying to find an explanation through tears because the woman you loved had run away. the embarrassment of that day still clung to you, a weight you couldn’t shake. there was nothing you could do except apologise to everyone — your parents, her parents, the guests.
but mostly, you apologised to yourself, for believing that you were enough for her.
it hit you the hardest that night, when you were alone in your flat, still dressed in your wedding suit that had taken you weeks to pick out.
the silence was deafening then, and for the first time, you realised she never loved you the way you loved her.
you didn’t hate her. you wanted to — god, you wanted to hate her. but you couldn’t. she was still the same woman who once made you laugh until your stomach hurt, who would drag you out of the rain just to kiss; the person who knew you the most.
she was still the love of your life.
and that was the cruelest part of it all.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the day was dragging in the way only hospital shifts could. fluorescent lights buzzed faintly overhead and the faint scent of antiseptic lingered in the air, clinging to your scrubs. your shoulders were tight, weighed down by exhaustion and the kind of hollow loneliness you’ve since stopped trying to fight.
you were scanning through patient charts at the nurses’ station when you heard her voice — bright and teasing, cutting like sunlight through thick curtains.
“there she is,” she called out as she strode towards you, a paper bag in one hand and a bottle of iced coffee in the other.
you groaned inwardly; not another one.
jimin was the last person you wanted to see. her presence was like a splash of colour in a grey world, drawing the attention of everyone around her.
“what are you doing here?” you asked, your tone more clipped than you intended.
she ignored the edge in your voice, plopping the bag onto the desk in front of you. “bringing you lunch, obviously. you’ve been skipping meals, haven’t you?”
“i’m fine,” you replied, already turning back to the chart in your hands.
“you’re always ‘fine,’” she said, rolling her eyes. “and yet you look like you haven’t slept in a week.”
“what do you want from me?” you groaned, exhaling heavily as you closed the charts and began your stride towards the staff room.
it was easier to deal with her alone than be surrounded by people gossiping: what is minjeong’s best friend doing with her ex-fiancée?
“checking on you, obviously,” she said as if it were the most natural thing in the world. “also, you skipped lunch again. so…” she quickened her pace behind you. “rina brought reinforcements.”
you sighed, glancing at her briefly. her dark hair was tied back in a loose ponytail and she was dressed casually in a hoodie and jeans.
for someone constantly in the public eye, she had a way of blending in when she wanted to.
“i didn’t ask for reinforcements,” you muttered, opening the door for her. “and i don’t need checking on daily.”
“clearly,” she replied, sarcasm lacing her tone as she looked up at you. “because you’re the picture of health and happiness.”
you shook your head. “you’re so…ugh, just something else.”
she opened the bag on the table, the smell immediately greeting your starved senses. “that’s why i brought food because if i left it up to you, you’d just keep surviving on coffee and whatever snacks you find lying around.”
you didn’t answer. you knew she meant well. jimin was one of the few people who hadn’t given up on you, even after you’d pushed her away countless times.
she started visiting you a year after the wedding-that-wasn’t, showing up with coffee, proper meals or just her company. you didn’t know why she bothered and you weren’t sure you wanted to.
“it’s your favourite,” she added, sliding the box towards you. “spicy pork and rice. come on, don’t make me waste a good meal.”
the smell of the food wafted up to you as you hesitated. it had been hours since you’d eaten and your stomach growled in betrayal. reluctantly, you grabbed the chopsticks and opened the container.
“there we go,” she said with a grin, settling into the chair across from you as she opened her own container; tonkatsu.
“you’re persistent,” you told her, taking a bite.
“someone has to be,” she replied, her voice softer now.
for a while, the only sound between you was the quiet clink of chopsticks against the container as you both ate in solitude. but jimin wasn’t the kind of person to let silence linger for long.
“how long are you planning to keep this up?” she asked suddenly as she threw her container into the bag, breaking the silence.
“keep what up?” you replied without looking at her, focusing instead on stabbing at a piece of pork with your chopsticks.
“this,” she said, gesturing vaguely at you. “the whole ‘lone wolf who doesn’t need anyone’ thing. it’s getting old.”
you sighed, not bothering to look up. “why do you care?”
“because i do,” she said simply, her tone infuriatingly casual.
you rolled your eyes, setting your chopsticks down with a little more force than necessary. “rina, we barely know each other these days. why do you bother to check in on me almost everyday?”
“i don’t know,” her grin faded, replaced by something more serious. “you were minjeong’s everything. and, for what it’s worth, she was my best friend. so maybe i care because i know what it’s like to be left behind by her too. or maybe, i simply just care about you.”
the words hit you harder than you expected. you looked up at her for the first time, caught off guard by the raw honesty in her voice.
“she left you too,” you said quietly, more a statement than a question.
she nodded, leaning back in her chair. “she was my anchor, you know? and then, one day, she was just…gone. no explanation, no goodbye. sound familiar?”
you swallowed hard, the ache in your chest growing sharper. “yeah, it does.”
for a moment, neither of you spoke, the silence between you heavy with unspoken grief and the strange sense of kinship that came with it.
after awhile, jimin cleared her throat, the light teasing tone slipping back into her voice as she watched you clean up. “so,” she began, “how’s rome? still the world’s most dramatic sausage dog?”
your chopsticks paused mid-air. rome. yours and minjeong’s dachshund. or just your sausage dog now, since she’d left. he’d been one of the few things that kept you going after she disappeared, a small source of comfort in a world that felt unbearably empty.
you blinked, caught off guard by the sudden change in topic. “he’s fine,” you said cautiously, not quite ready to let your guard down.
she raised an eyebrow, a playful smirk tugging at her lips. “just ‘fine’? come on, y/n. give me something.”
you sighed, leaning back in your chair. “he’s good. healthy. still hates the postman.”
“classic rome,” she said, laughing softly. “does he still steal your socks?”
“every chance he gets,” you admitted, the faintest hint of a smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. “he buried one of my favourite pairs in the garden last week. i didn’t even know he could dig that deep.”
“a true criminal mastermind,” she laughed. “i miss him.”
you tilted your head, studying her for a moment. “i don’t think he hasn’t forgotten you.”
her smile faltered slightly, her gaze dropping to the table. “good, i’d like to bother him sometime.”
you nodded, not pushing further. the silence that followed wasn’t as heavy as before, but it still carried the weight of everything unsaid.
“i have to go back to work soon,” you muttered slowly. “thanks for bringing me lunch, again.”
she leaned forward once more, resting her elbows on the table. “you know, you’re a lot nicer when you talk about rome.”
“am i?” you said dryly, raising an eyebrow.
“yeah,” she chuckled, grinning. “maybe you should bring him to work. he could be a therapy dog or something.”
“not sure the hospital would appreciate that,” you replied, shaking your head.
“probably not,” she agreed. “you talk about him more than you talk about yourself.”
“what’s there to talk about?” you asked, avoiding her gaze.
“a lot,” she said simply. “but you won’t let anyone in long enough to find out.”
“maybe because there’s nothing worth finding out,” you shot back, your tone sharper than you intended.
she didn’t flinch, didn’t look away. “i don’t really believe that. i know you.”
you opened your mouth to argue, but the words caught in your throat because a small part of you, buried beneath the layers of grief and anger and self-imposed isolation, wanted to believe she was right.
“you don’t have to do this, you know,” you said finally, your voice quieter now. “come here. check on me. it’s…unnecessary.”
“it’s not about necessity — it’s about wanting to. and i want to, y/n. because whether you believe it or not, you matter to me,” then, as if the idea had just occurred to her, she added, “you know what you should do? come to dinner with us tonight. aeri is hosting dinner at her place. yizhuo will be there too and they’d love to see you.”
“i don’t know…i’m not really built for —“
“they miss you,” she cut you off gently. “we all do. you don’t have to stay long. just come, have some food, catch up. it doesn’t have to be a big deal.”
you frowned, your fingers fidgeting with the edge of your lunch container. “i’m not great at…socialising these days.”
“that’s fine,” she reassured, her voice soft. “just come as you are. no one’s expecting anything from you.”
you hesitated, torn between the comfort of your solitude and the faint pull of connection her words stirred in you. “i’ll think about it,” you said finally, though the words felt like an excuse.
for a moment, you let yourself wonder what it would be like to let her in, to let someone care about you again. but the fear of losing her — of losing anyone — was too much.
“don’t just think about it,” she said, standing up and grabbing her things. “you’re coming. i’ll pick you up after your shift. and don’t even think about bailing.”
“rina —”
“i mean it, y/n,” she cut you off with a grin that somehow felt more like a challenge. “we’ll eat at aeri’s. it’ll be fun. you might even smile. who knows?”
you shook your head, but the faintest hint of a smile tugged at your lips as you watched her walk away. she paused at the door, turning back to look at you.
“and bring pictures of rome,” she added. “aeri and yizhuo will want to see how much of a menace he’s become.”
you didn’t respond, but you nodded, the warmth of her persistence lingering even after she was gone. as you returned to your rounds, you caught yourself thinking about her smile, her persistence, her refusal to give up on you.
you hated how it made you feel. hated the tiny flicker of warmth it sparked in a heart you had sworn to keep cold.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the shift had been surprisingly uneventful. for once, you weren’t racing from one emergency to the next and the patients you saw were mostly routine cases; check-ups, minor injuries, nothing life-threatening. as the hours dragged on, you found yourself in a slightly better mood than usual, a rare occurrence these days.
the thought of dinner at aeri’s later still felt strange, but not as daunting as it had earlier. perhaps it was the conversation with jimin, or maybe you were just too tired to keep holding up the walls you’d built around yourself.
jiwoo, ever persistent in her cheerful attempts to connect with you, caught up with you as you clocked out. “you seemed a bit more relaxed today,” she said, her tone light but teasing. “you’re not scaring off the patients as much.”
you smirked faintly, shaking your head. “glad to know i’m improving.”
as the two of you stepped outside, the cool evening air hit your face. you pulled out your nearly empty cigarette box, shaking one out with practised ease. the box crinkled, reminding you that you’d bought it only yesterday. you lit up, the flame from your lighter flickering briefly before catching.
she wrinkled her nose. “you really should quit, you know.”
“yeah, yeah,” you muttered, exhaling smoke into the air. “everyone’s a critic.”
she folded her arms, watching you for a moment before changing the subject. “so…karina from aespa really just brings you lunch sometimes? i feel like you’re pulling my leg.”
you chuckled softly, the sound surprising both of you. “it’s true. we know each other from my…better days.”
she tilted her head, curiosity written all over her face. “what does that mean?”
you hesitated, taking another drag from your cigarette. “we were friends. through minjeong.”
her eyes widened slightly, but she didn’t press further. she’d been around long enough to know your ex was a subject best avoided. instead, she smiled softly. “must be nice to have someone like that still looking out for you.”
“it is,” you admitted quietly, unintentionally exhaling curls of smoke towards her direction. “sorry.”
she chuckled, shaking her head. “it’s okay — and you seem really bright around her, you know? i think she brings out the best in you.”
you hummed, nodding as you stubbed the cigarette under your shoe. “she’s just a friend; nothing more.”
minjeong and jimin. two names you hadn’t expected to be tied together so tightly in your mind. yet, lately, it was impossible not to think of one without the other.
minjeong had been everything to you once. she was the love you thought would last forever, the one you trusted with all of yourself. and even though she had shattered you, you still couldn’t bring yourself to hate her. there was a part of you that would always respect what you shared, even if it ended so painfully.
and then there was jimin. minjeong’s best friend. the one who had been there long before you entered the picture. the one who probably knew minjeong better than anyone else.
it felt…strange, wrong even, to start seeing jimin in a way that might be more than friendship. you respected her too much — her persistence, her kindness, the way she stayed by your side when no one else could reach you. she wasn’t just some comforting presence in your life; she was someone you admired deeply.
before jiwoo could say anything else, a sleek black car pulled up to the kerb. jimin leaned out of the driver’s side window, her signature grin lighting up her face. “well, well. look who’s socialising.”
her jaw practically dropped. “oh my god, it really is her.”
jimin waved casually. “hey, jiwoo, right? need a lift? there’s plenty of room.”
jiwoo blushed furiously, waving her hands. “oh, no, no. my boyfriend’s coming to pick me up. but thanks.”
“suit yourself,” she said, winking playfully before turning her attention to you. “you ready?”
you nodded, giving jiwoo a small wave before slipping into the passenger seat. the car smelled like leather and a faint hint of vanilla, a stark contrast to the cigarette smoke still clinging to your scrubs.
“you reek of cigarettes, you know,” she pointed out as she pulled out onto the road, her tone more teasing than scolding. “how many have you had today?”
you shrugged, leaning your head against the window. “i don’t count.”
“you should. your lungs aren’t invincible, doctor,” she quipped, glancing at you briefly before focusing back on the road.
you smirked faintly. “and you’re suddenly a health expert?”
“no,” she admitted, grinning. “but i care about you not hacking up a lung in ten years.”
the corners of your mouth twitched, the warmth of her concern nudging at the edges of your guarded heart. you changed the subject, gesturing at the car’s pristine interior. “nice car.”
“of course it’s nice,” she replied, flashing a proud smile. “you think i’d settle for anything less?”
you chuckled softly, shaking your head. “why do you think i catch the train, then?”
she glanced at you, curious. “i always wondered about that. you can afford a car. why put yourself through that misery?”
you hesitated, your fingers fidgeting with the strap of your bag. “because…i don’t know. it makes me feel better. seeing a million other miserable people in the train. reminds me i’m not the only one stuck in this mess.”
jimin didn’t respond immediately, her grip on the wheel tightening slightly. when she finally spoke, her voice was soft. “you’re not as miserable as you think, y/n.”
you huffed a small laugh, not entirely believing her but appreciating the sentiment. “sure.”
the silence that followed wasn’t uncomfortable, just reflective. it was jimin who broke it. “do you need to stop anywhere before we head to aeri’s?”
you hesitated for a moment before nodding. “can we stop at my apartment? i need to feed rome and shower. i smell like the hospital.”
“of course,” she said, her tone brightening. “you know, i don’t mind. i’m just happy to hear more than two words out of you.”
you rolled your eyes but couldn’t fight the faint smile tugging at your lips. “don’t get used to it.”
“too late,” she quipped, her grin widening as she turned the car towards your apartment.
the rest of the ride to your place was quiet, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. you found yourself glancing at her more than you intended, the soft light highlighting the gentle curve of her jaw, the way her hair fell just so around her face. she was undeniably beautiful.
it wasn’t something you hadn’t noticed before —jimin had always been striking, but sitting this close to her, the air between you filled with the faint scent of her perfume, it felt different.
more intimate.
your gaze lingered on her profile, tracing the slope of her nose, the soft pink of her lips, the way her expression relaxed whenever the traffic eased. the thought crept into your mind unbidden, catching you off guard: she’s really beautiful.
the streets blurred past, but your mind was elsewhere, swirling with a mixture of confusion and guilt. it felt wrong to think about her like that when she was minjeong’s best friend.
it was complicated enough having her in your life so prominently now. you couldn’t add feelings to the mix.
“what’s wrong?” jimin’s voice pulled you from your thoughts, her tone light but tinged with curiosity.
you turned to see her glancing at you briefly before returning her focus to the road. her question made your heart race slightly and you felt heat creeping up your neck.
“nothing,” you said quickly, your voice betraying your awkwardness.
she smirked, clearly unconvinced. “you’ve been quiet. and you keep looking at me. what’s going on in that head of yours?”
you swallowed hard, your palms suddenly feeling clammy. you debated brushing it off, but the words slipped out before you could stop them. “you…you just look nice today, that’s all.”
the silence that followed was deafening. her grip on the steering wheel faltered slightly and her cheeks flushed a soft pink, lips parting as if she was going to say something, but she quickly pressed them together, biting back a grin.
“shut up,” she said finally, her voice quieter than usual, but the blush on her face betrayed her.
you felt your own cheeks burn, suddenly hyper-aware of how close the two of you were in the small car.
“i was just saying,” you mumbled, your fingers fidgeting with the strap of your bag.
“yeah, well, don’t,” she shot back, though her tone was more playful than serious.
the tension between you was palpable, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. it was something else entirely, something neither of you was ready to name.
the car rolled to a stop just outside your apartment building, its headlights briefly illuminating the cracked pavement. you unbuckled your seatbelt, glancing up at the familiar, worn façade of the place you’d called home for years. it looked the same, but somehow it always felt emptier every time you came back.
“hey,” jimin began, her voice breaking through your thoughts. “can i please see rome? just for a minute. aeri and yizhuo will be so jealous.”
you frowned, your hand pausing on the door handle. “my apartment’s a mess. i haven’t had anyone over in a long time.”
“i don’t care,” she said easily, her grin unfaltering. “you should see the state of mine. you’d think i was filming a disaster documentary.”
you sighed, knowing she wouldn’t let it go. “fine. but don’t say i didn’t warn you.”
she flashed a triumphant smile. “deal.”
in the elevator, you found yourself uncharacteristically aware of her presence. it wasn’t just that she was your ex-fiancée’s ex-best friend — it was the fact that, even after everything, jimin was still here, still trying to pull you out of the dark pit you had thrown yourself into.
you shifted awkwardly, your hand trembling slightly at your side. the metal walls of the elevator seemed to amplify your unease. without a word, she reached over and gently squeezed your hand. her grip was steady, grounding, and for a brief moment, you allowed yourself to hold on.
“it’s okay,” she said softly, her voice barely above a whisper.
you didn’t respond, but her touch was enough to steady you.
as soon as you unlocked the door, the sound of tiny paws skittering across the hardwood floor filled the air. rome came bounding towards you, his tail wagging so hard it looked like it might fall off.
“romie,” you said, your voice softening for the first time all day. you crouched down to pet him, his fur warm and familiar against your hand.
jimin let out an audible gasp. “oh my god. he’s even cuter than i remember.” she immediately dropped her bag and scooped him up, cradling him like a baby. “hi, buddy. remember me?”
he licked her face enthusiastically, his little legs wriggling in her arms. you couldn’t help but smile at the sight, even as you stood up and rubbed the back of your neck.
“make yourself at home,” you said, gesturing vaguely at the apartment. “i’m going to get ready.”
she nodded, her attention fully on rome. “take your time. we’re going to have a bonding moment.”
as you disappeared into the bathroom, the sound of running water began to echo faintly, muffled by the door you’d closed behind you. she sat on the edge of your sofa with rome, her eyes wandering around your apartment.
the place was cleaner than she expected — it wasn’t messy, but it felt bare. the walls were stripped of personality and there wasn’t a single photo or decoration to suggest that anyone else had once shared this space with you. it was a stark contrast to the way she remembered it years ago, when minjeong had still been part of your life.
now, it was as if you had erased every trace of her.
her gaze drifted to the kitchen counter, where an open bottle of whiskey sat next to a half-empty glass. there were other bottles too, some empty, others half-finished, lined up neatly on the sideboard. her chest tightened at the sight, and she had to swallow the sudden lump in her throat.
all she wanted to do was love you. all of you. the person you were now, the person you had been before, even the parts that you were trying to bury under layers of pain and grief.
jimin leaned back against the sofa, letting out a soft sigh as her thoughts turned inward. it should feel wrong, this pull she felt toward you. you were minjeong’s ex-fiancée. she had been your everything once. she had seen it firsthand — the way the two of you fit together, the quiet understanding in your shared glances; your love seemed unshakable.
and yet, here she was, sitting in your apartment, waiting for you while you showered, her heart heavy with feelings she couldn’t push away.
she didn’t know when it had started. this shift in how she saw you. maybe it was that day at the hospital, months ago. she’d been visiting aeri and yizhuo and wanted to bring you lunch when she passed by the paediatrics ward and caught sight of you comforting a young boy.
he had been crying, terrified of getting his vaccinations and you’d knelt down to his level, your voice soft and reassuring.
“it’s okay,” you reassured in a gentle tone, holding out your hand for him to squeeze. “you’re so brave. and once it’s over, you’ll get a cool sticker. how about that?”
the boy had stopped crying long enough to nod and you smiled at him — wide, genuine and full of warmth. it had been the first time she had seen you smile like that in years.
all it took was that one moment.
she had tried to suppress her feelings after that. tried to remind herself of the boundaries she needed to keep but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t stop thinking about you.
she had gone on dates, tried seeing other people, hoping it would dull the ache but none of them made her feel the way you did.
no one else mattered. it was maddening as it was terrifying, but it was also undeniable.
jimin ran a hand through her hair, her fingers brushing against the back of her neck as she let out another sigh. aeri and yizhuo didn’t seem to think there was anything wrong with how she felt.
“i don’t really see the problem,” aeri had said bluntly one night over dinner, shrugging as she picked her rice. “minjeong packed up and left her old life behind. what’s the problem?”
“you’re not stealing anyone’s woman,” yizhuo chimed in with a smirk, earning a glare from jimin.
“it’s not that simple,” jimin argued, though their words had lingered.
now, sitting here in your apartment, surrounded by the quiet evidence of your pain, she felt the full weight of her feelings.
she wasn’t just drawn to you — she was in love with you. completely, overwhelmingly in love.
the water shut off and the apartment grew silent. she straightened slightly, her heart pounding as she heard you moving around in the bathroom. she didn’t know if she could ever say it out loud, but in this moment, she didn’t need to.
“he likes you,” you said as you stepped out, nodding towards rome, who was now curled up in her lap, his eyes half-closed in contentment.
“what’s not to like?” she replied, scratching behind his ears. “he’s a smart dog. clearly knows quality people when he sees them.”
“right, of course,” you gave a faint smile, leaning against the doorframe. “ready to go?”
“yeah,” she said, reluctantly setting rome down. she grabbed her bag and followed you to the door, glancing back once at the apartment before stepping out.
as you rode down in the elevator, the silence between you was comfortable this time. she didn’t say anything about the empty walls or the whiskey, but when she handed you her car keys so you could unlock the door for her, her fingers brushed against yours and the gesture spoke louder than any words could.
…this shouldn’t be happening.
when the doors slid open to the ground floor, jimin spun her keys around her finger, her expression bright with mischief. she tossed them towards you without warning, the metal jingling as they flew through the air.
“you’re driving,” she declared, slipping into the passenger seat before you could argue.
you caught the keys instinctively, furrowing your brow. “why?”
“because,” she said, already buckling her seatbelt, “i want to test your driving skills. it’s been a while, hasn’t it?”
you gave her an unimpressed look, holding the keys loosely in your hand. “you just want to be a passenger princess.”
she gasped theatrically, clutching at her chest like you just insulted her deepest values. “how dare you. i am not a passenger princess.”
“sure,” you said, shaking your head as you got into the driver’s seat. “whatever you say.”
jimin smirked, leaning back into the seat with a smug expression. “prove me wrong then. show me you can still handle a car like the pro you are.”
you rolled your eyes but started the car anyway, the familiar hum of the engine filling the space between you. as you adjusted the mirrors and pulled out onto the street, you couldn’t help the faint smile tugging at your lips.
for the first time in a while, the banter felt easy, even enjoyable.
but then, without thinking, the words slipped out.
“minjeong used to do that,” you muttered softly, almost to yourself. “she would always make me drive so she could either pick the music or nap.”
the air in the car shifted instantly, the lightness replaced by something heavier. you stiffened, gripping the steering wheel tightly as you realised what you said. your eyes stayed firmly on the road, the silence between you now deafening.
she didn’t speak right away and for a moment, you wished the earth would just swallow you whole.
then, she broke the silence, her voice softer, more careful. “you know…it’s okay to talk about her, i don’t mind.”
you blinked, your knuckles whitening on the steering wheel. “is it?” you said flatly, though there was no anger in your tone, just weariness.
“yeah,” she replied turning slightly to face you. “it’s okay to acknowledge that she existed. that you loved her even though she hurt you, pretending she didn’t matter isn’t going to help you move on.”
you swallowed hard, throat tightening. the logical part of you knew she was right, but the emotional part; the one that still felt raw and exposed whenever minjeong’s name came up wasn’t ready to admit it.
so you said nothing, the silence stretching uncomfortably again.
after a minute of beating around the bush, jimin sighed softly, her voice tinged with regret. “sorry. i didn’t mean to push. i just —”
“it’s fine,” you interrupted, surprising even yourself with the quiet sincerity in your voice. you glanced at her briefly, a small, genuine smile crossing your face. “really.”
she relaxed visibly, her shoulders dropping as the tension eased. “okay,” she said, her own smile returning, though it was softer this time.
as you drove, jimin’s own thoughts began to spiral. hearing you talk about minjeong felt like a punch to the gut, but she couldn’t blame you. she was your first love, the one who had taken up all the space in your heart before it was broken.
how could she even try to compete with that?
she knew there was a part of you that might never stop loving minjeong, no matter how much time passed.
she glanced at you again, catching the way your shoulders had relaxed slightly, the faintest hint of a smile tugging at your lips.
it doesn’t matter how long it takes, she thought to herself. i’ll wait. for as long as it takes, i’ll wait for her.
when you pulled up to aeri’s apartment building, jimin hopped out of the car, clearly energised. she waited for you to join her, rocking on her heels as you locked the car behind you.
“ready for the chaos?” she asked, flashing a grin.
“as ready as i’ll ever be,” you muttered, following her into the lift as you took the luxurious sight in. “god, she’s expensive as ever, isn’t she?”
she chuckled, tapping your arm lightly. “don’t say anything about it or else you’re going to start a fight.”
the elevator doors slid shut with a soft hum, the quiet clink of the mechanisms filling the small space. you stood beside her, your hand clutching the strap of your bag as your stomach twisted with nerves.
it had been years since you had last been to aeri’s apartment, and now, as the numbers on the elevator panel lit up one by one, the memories began flooding back.
everything felt heavier in your chest — the last time you were here, everything was different. you hadn’t seen those girls properly in so long and the thought of walking into a space that had once felt so familiar left you uneasy.
jimin, standing close to you, noticed the slight tremour in your hand. without a word, she reached over and gently squeezed it once more, her fingers warm and firm against yours.
“you’re okay,” she said softly, her voice steady. “it’s just aeri and yizhuo. they’re gonna be so happy to see you.”
you nodded but didn’t say anything, focusing instead on the way her hand steadied your own. as the elevator neared the top floor, she started to pull away, her fingers slipping from yours.
but you held on, tightening your grip instinctively. “can you —” you started, your voice barely above a whisper. “just for a bit longer.”
she didn’t say anything, but her fingers curled back around yours, holding on tightly. the two of you stood like that in silence, the elevator’s hum filling the space; it felt like the calm before a storm you weren’t sure you could weather alone.
the elevator dinged and you stepped into the hallway with jimin by your side. your hand was still holding hers from earlier, though you hadn’t realised it until she glanced down briefly, her fingers tightening just a little before she let go.
“sorry,” you awkwardly mumbled, blood rushing to your cheeks.
“don’t be.”
the warmth lingered even as you adjusted the strap of your bag and followed her toward aeri’s door; it opened before you could even knock.
“y/n!” aeri’s voice was the first thing you heard, loud and filled with surprise and excitement. “no way, it’s really you!”
you barely had time to blink before she lunged forward, throwing her arms around your neck and dragging you into a tight hug. before you could respond, a second body crashed into you from the side — yizhuo, her laughter echoing through the hallway.
“oh my gosh, she’s actually here,” yizhuo said, her grin wide as she squeezed you tightly. “rina, what the hell did you do to her? hypnosis? bribery? a chloroform rag?”
“definitely drugged her bubble tea,” aeri chimed in, her face still buried in your shoulder. “there’s no way y/n came here willingly.”
“guys, get off me!” you laughed, trying to push them away, but your voice lacked any real force. their energy was infectious, and though part of you wanted to retreat, a bigger part…one you hadn’t felt in years just wanted to stay in this moment.
“nope,” yizhuo groaned, holding on even tighter. “you don’t get to vanish for two years and show up out of nowhere like nothing happened. you’re gonna deal with this. this being us smothering you with love.”
“you should be grateful,” aeri added with a smirk, finally pulling back just enough to look at you. “this is premium-grade affection. we don’t just give this to anyone.”
jimin stood to the side, leaning against the doorframe with her arms crossed, her smile tugging at the corners of her lips. “i didn’t drug her, by the way,” she said casually, her voice dripping with mock indignation. “she came because she missed you guys. obviously.”
“liar,” yizhuo shot back, narrowing her eyes. “there’s no way y/n came willingly. what’s your secret, jimin? blackmail? compromising photos?”
“it was the bubble tea,” jimin said, straight-faced. “i spiked it with nostalgia.”
“sounds like you put something stronger than nostalgia in there,” aeri quipped, her grin widening.
you rolled your eyes, but your smile betrayed you. “you guys are ridiculous.”
“you missed us,” yizhuo said smugly, finally releasing you from her grip. “admit it.”
“maybe,” you muttered, smoothing down your shirt. “a little.”
aeri gasped dramatically, clutching her chest. “a little? i’m hurt. offended, even.”
jimin stepped forward, pulling out her phone. “hold still,” she said, her grin mischievous. “this is a historic moment.”
“don’t you dare,” you warned, your voice rising in mock panic as she aimed the camera at the three of you.
the flash went off before you could stop her, capturing a candid shot of aeri still clinging to your side, yizhuo laughing uncontrollably and you mid-protest with a faint smile tugging at your lips.
“perfect,” jimin said, already typing away as she uploaded the photo to her story. “caption: my three idiots.”
“three?” aeri asked, raising an eyebrow. “don’t you mean two idiots and one innocent victim?”
“you’re definitely the biggest idiot here,” yizhuo smirked at her. “but it’s okay. we still love you.”
“barely,” jimin quipped, her tone teasing as she slid her phone back into her pocket.
the apartment buzzed with laughter and conversation as the four of you settled in for dinner. the table was covered in food — aeri’s version of cooking: ramen, pizza boxes, bowls of chips and a bottle of wine that she had insisted on opening way before dinner.
“so,” aeri began, leaning forward with her elbows on the table. “doctor, what have you been up to? saving lives? breaking hearts? fighting crime?”
“you act like i’ve been doing something exciting,” you shook your head as you picked at your pizza. “it’s just been work. and more work.”
“classic y/n,” yizhuo threw her hands up dramatically. “always married to the job.”
“it’s a demanding spouse,” you joked, surprising yourself at how easily the humour came.
“does it at least make you breakfast in bed?” aeri teased, wagging her eyebrows.
“nope,” you replied, smirking. “just gives me migraines.”
“sounds toxic,” jimin said, her voice light. “you should break up with it.”
“and do what?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at her. “become a full-time boba taster?”
“not a bad idea,” yizhuo chimed in, taking another bite of her slice. “you’d have jimin’s full support.”
aeri shrugged. “or you could just be her housewife. she’s a millionaire, you know?”
you dared to steal a glance, expecting jimin to brush off their teasing, but instead, she was looking right at you. her gaze was steady, her lips tugged into the faintest smile.
the way she looked at you sent your heart racing and you quickly looked away, focusing on the slice of pizza in your hand as if it held all the answers in the universe.
as the night went on, you found yourself relaxing more, your initial nervousness melting away under the warmth of their banter. but then your eyes wandered to the wall across the room, where a cluster of framed photos hung.
they were all of aespa — smiling, performing, and posing together in various moments that captured their bond. your gaze caught one in particular: minjeong standing between aeri and yizhuo, her face frozen in time among her friends.
the memories threatened to creep in, but before they could overwhelm you, you felt jimin’s gaze on you. you glanced over and she was already smiling softly, her expression reassuring. it was enough to steady you, to remind you that it was okay to feel what you felt.
“we haven’t done much since minjeong left,” aeri’s voice cut through the comfortable buzz of the room.
“yeah,” yizhuo added, swirling her wine glass. “we’ve released a few singles here and there, but it’s not the same. we’re not really aespa without her.”
jimin nodded, her expression thoughtful. “it’s been different,” she admitted. “but we’re figuring it out.”
“figuring it out,” yizhuo repeated, snorting. “aka, doing nothing but lazing around and ordering takeout.”
aeri grinned. “we’ve perfected the art of slacking, we should win awards for it.”
their banter was light and the laughter genuine. it pulled you back into the moment. for the first time in what felt like forever, you found yourself laughing along with them — really laughing.
as the night wore on, the chaos around the table began to settle into a comfortable rhythm. the laughter quieted and the conversation took on a more relaxed, intimate tone. the pizza boxes were mostly empty and aeri poured another glass of wine for herself and yizhuo, both of them visibly enjoying the rare moment of everyone being together.
with your bag slung over your shoulder, jimin stood by the door while aeri and yizhuo hugged you tightly.
“you know,” aeri began, leaning back. “it’s really nice to have you here, y/n. we’ve missed you.”
“like, really missed you,” yizhuo said, her tone serious for once. “i mean, i know life’s been…a lot. but you don’t have to disappear on us, you know? we’re always here for you.”
the words hung in the air, their sincerity hitting you harder than you expected. you stared at the table for a moment, your fingers idly tracing the edge of your glass.
“i know,” you said quietly, your voice softer than usual. “and i’m sorry. for shutting you guys out. it wasn’t fair. i was more embarrassed —“
“it’s not about fair,” aeri interjected gently, setting her glass down. “we just don’t want to lose you again. you’re important to us, y/n. even if you’ve got your walls up, we’ll keep knocking.”
“and by knocking, she means barging in,” yizhuo added with a grin, earning a laugh from both you and jimin.
“i mean it, though,” she continued, her tone earnest. “we’re here for you. anytime.”
jimin glanced at you, her eyes soft, but she didn’t say anything. she didn’t need to — the look she gave you was enough.
you nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. “thanks, i…i missed you guys too. i’ll see you guys next weekend?”
“of course,” yizhuo smiled, kissing your cheek goodbye. “rome better be prepared for aeri’s annoying ass.”
aeri rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. “stop talking, ning, y/n has to go!”
“yeah, right, forgot you guys were unemployed,” you rubbed the back of your head with a laugh as you turned and began to walk with jimin. “see you both soon.”
the walk back to jimin’s car was quiet, the cool night air a refreshing contrast to the warmth of the apartment. you shoved your hands into your pockets, your footsteps echoing lightly on the pavement. she walked beside you, her shoulder close enough to brush against yours occasionally.
“you okay?” she asked after a moment, glancing at you.
you nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips. “yeah, i had a good time.”
“good,” she said simply, her own smile soft and genuine.
you hesitated, your gaze fixed on the ground as you spoke. “i didn’t realise how much i missed them. being with them…it felt normal. like…like things weren’t so heavy for a while.”
she nodded, her pace slowing slightly. “that’s the thing about aeri and yizhuo. they’re chaotic as fuck, but they have this way of making you forget about the rest of the world.”
“they do,” you agreed, your smile widening just a fraction. “i think i needed that.”
she stopped walking and turned to face you, her hands slipping into her coat pockets. “you don’t have to wait two years to do it again, you know. they meant it when they said they’re here for you. and so did i.”
you met her gaze, the sincerity in her eyes making your chest tighten. “i know. and…thanks, rina. for everything.”
she shrugged lightly, though the faint blush creeping up her neck betrayed her. “you don’t have to thank me. i just want you to be okay.”
“i think…i’m getting there,” you admitted, your voice soft. “slowly.”
she smiled, her expression a mix of relief and something else you couldn’t quite name. “that’s all that matters.”
as the two of you reached the car, you hesitated again, the words forming on your lips before you could stop them. “jimin?”
“yeah?” she asked, pausing as she unlocked the doors.
you took a deep breath, forcing yourself to meet her gaze. “thank you. for not giving up on me. and…for reminding me that it’s okay to let people in.”
her smile softened, and she reached out to squeeze your arm briefly. “i never would. i’m just glad you’re here.”
you nodded, climbing into the passenger seat as she started the car. as she drove, the hum of the engine and the faint city lights passing by felt less daunting than they usually did. for the first time in a long time, you felt like you weren’t alone. and perhaps, you didn’t have to be.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the train rocked gently as it made its way through seoul’s early morning haze. you sat in your usual spot by the window, absently watching the buildings blur together. for once, you didn’t look like you had just rolled out of bed and barely made it to the station; your scrubs were tidy, hair tied back neatly and there was even a faint sheen of moisturiser on your face — a small but deliberate effort to feel a little more presentable.
it wasn’t much, but it was something. after that dinner with the remaining members of aespa, you found yourself thinking…about how much you had isolated yourself and how it might not be the worst thing in the world to try again.
to exist around people who cared.
your phone buzzed in your pocket, pulling you from your thoughts. you hesitated before pulling it out, already knowing who it would be.
-
from: jimin - aespa
do you still like purple taro bubble tea or has your taste in drinks gotten worse too?
sent 7:50 AM
-
you sighed, the faintest of smiles tugging at your lips despite yourself. she had a way of making her presence known, whether you wanted it or not. since dinner at aeri’s, she had been texting you more often, showing up at the hospital and generally refusing to let you retreat back into your solitude.
you stared at the message for a long moment, the smile fading as doubt crept in.
why was she doing this? why did she care? she was an idol, a successful one at that, with a million other things she could be doing.
the thought made your chest tighten. you typed a response, your fingers moving quickly.
to: jimin - aespa
yes, but you should do better things with your time than hanging out at the hospital with me.
sent 7:51 AM
you hesitated for a moment, wondering if you were being too harsh, but the thought of her spending so much effort on you — it felt undeserved. and it scared you. you hit send and immediately turned your phone off, tucking it back into your pocket.
the train ride passed in a blur, the rhythmic clatter of the wheels luring you into a daze. when you stepped off at your station, the morning chill greeted you, sharp against your skin. you pulled your coat tighter around yourself, your hand instinctively reaching into your pocket for your cigarette box. the box was light — too light — but you fished out a cigarette and lit it, the flame flickering in the breeze.
you took a long drag, letting the smoke fill your lungs before exhaling slowly. it didn’t help much, never did, but it gave you something to do, something to focus on. your thoughts, as they often did, drifted to minjeong. her face, her voice, the way she used to call you at the hospital just to complain about how exhausting her day was.
but lately, your thoughts had started to wander elsewhere, too. to jimin. her relentless persistence, her easy smiles and just the way she had managed to slip into your life without you even realising. you hated how much space she was starting to take up in your head.
it felt…complicated. and you didn’t do complicated anymore.
as you walked, cigarette still in hand, your gaze caught on a small coffee shop just opening for the morning. the smell of freshly brewed coffee wafted out, the barista flipping the “open” sign to face the street. you stopped in your tracks, hesitating before stepping inside.
the shop was warm, the faint whir of an espresso machine filling the air. you approached the counter, glancing at the menu even though you already knew what you wanted.
“can i get a caramel latte?” you asked, your voice soft but steady. after a pause, you added: “actually, make that two. one iced, one hot.”
the barista nodded, tapping your order into the register. you waited by the counter, the warmth of the shop a sharp contrast to the cool morning outside.
when the drinks were ready, you grabbed the cups and stepped back out onto the street, beginning your trek towards the hospital, the steam from the hot latte curling into the chilly air.
you didn’t usually do this — go out of your way for someone else. but jiwoo had been kind to you for nearly a year now, always trying to engage, smiling even when you brushed her off. maybe it was time to start giving something back, even if just a little.
when you walked into the hospital, the familiar buzz of activity greeted you. you spotted jiwoo at the nurses’ station, her head bent over a stack of charts.
you approached her quietly, holding out the iced caramel latte. “here.”
she looked up, her eyes widening in surprise. “what’s this?”
“thought you’d like one,” you replied, shrugging.
she stared at you for a moment before breaking into a wide grin. “wow, y/n. are you feeling okay? did you hit your head?”
you rolled your eyes, but there was a faint smile on your lips. “don’t get used to it.”
she laughed, taking the drink. “thank you. seriously. this is…really sweet of you.”
you nodded, already turning to leave. “see you later.”
“karina’s a good influence isn’t she?” she raised an eyebrow, teasing tone audible. you flipped her off, a faint blush creeping up your cheeks.
right.
the rest of the day passed in a haze of patient charts and routine procedures. you kept your phone off, avoiding the temptation to check for a reply from jimin but as the hours wore on, you found yourself thinking about her text more and more.
despite your earlier message, you couldn’t shake the image of her showing up at the hospital later, bubble tea in hand, her grin as smug as ever.
you hated how much the thought warmed you. but you didn’t push it away either. maybe you were starting to feel okay with someone caring again.
the faint hum of fluorescent lights filled the space as you flipped through a patient’s chart. it was a rare quiet in your often chaotic schedule these past few days, one that allowed you a moment to breathe and reset before the next inevitable call.
signing off on an order, you heaved out a sigh as you reached out for your pen. then, an older nurse came barrelling towards you — panting.
“doctor y/n!” she called, her tone sharp enough to cut through the calm.
you straightened immediately, the chart forgotten. “what is it?”
“we’ve got a trauma case in the OR,” she said, her words rushing out in a panicked stream. “male, thirty-one, massive internal bleeding from a car accident. he’s critical. there’s no other trauma surgeon on call.”
you froze for half a second, the weight of her words sinking in. the situation wasn’t unusual; emergencies happened all the time, but when she added the final detail, your stomach twisted painfully.
“he was on his way to his wedding,” she said, her voice cracking slightly.
the words hit you like
“prep the OR,” you said firmly, already moving. “i’ll be on my way.”
the words hit you like a truck, but you didn’t let it show. you pushed the memories down, shoving them into the mental box you had built for moments like this.
there was no time to think, no time to feel.
the operating room was a blur of activity when you arrived, the team already scrubbing in and preparing the patient. you quickly donned yours, hands moving with practised precision even as your mind raced.
the man on the table looked young, too young to be fighting for his life. his face was pale, his breathing shallow and the monitors surrounding him beeped erratically.
“what’s his status?” you asked, your voice calm despite the chaos around you.
“male, 31, car accident on the way to his wedding. chest trauma, ruptured spleen, internal bleeding, fractured ribs — we tried contacting other trauma surgeons, but you’re the only one available.”
you clenched your jaw, nodding as you pulled on your gloves. there was no room for hesitation now, no room for your own feelings to surface. the situation was painfully familiar, too close to home, but you buried it deep. your only focus was the man on the table, his life hanging by a thread.
you nodded, stepping into position. “scalpel.”
the surgery was gruelling. time seemed to blur as you worked, every second stretching into an eternity. the damage was extensive — a ruptured spleen, lacerations to the liver and fractures to his ribs that had caused additional complications. you moved methodically, your hands steady even as sweat trickled down your temple.
“suction,” you said, your voice steady despite the pressure.
the nurse complied and you continued, carefully navigating the delicate web of organs and tissues.
“laceration to the liver,” you muttered, leaning closer. “clamp here. we need to stop this before we lose him.”
time blurred as you worked, every movement calculated, every decision critical. the fractures in his ribs had caused additional internal damage, complicating an already precarious situation.
“keep the suction steady,” you said, glancing at the anaesthesiologist. “how’s he holding up?”
“stable for now,” came the reply, though the tension in the room didn’t ease.
the hours dragged on, your focus unwavering even as exhaustion began to creep in. piece by piece, you repaired the damage.
finally, after what felt like an eternity, the monitors began to steady. “his vitals are improving,” one of the nurses announced, relief evident in her voice.
“he’s going to make it,” you stepped back, your hands trembling slightly as you removed the gloves.
the team around you exhaled collectively, and a few murmured congratulations filled the room. but you didn’t feel triumphant — just drained.
you barely made it outside before pulling out a cigarette, your hands still shaking from the adrenaline. the first drag burned your throat, but the sting was grounding, pulling you back into yourself.
leaning against the hospital’s garden wall, you stared blankly at the stick in your hand.
the man’s story, on his way to his wedding, was too close to home. it dug up memories you’d spent years trying to bury.
the cigarette fell from your hand as the first sob escaped your lips, your shoulders trembling under the weight of three years’ worth of suppressed grief — fingers curling into fists, nails digging into your palms as your breath hitched.
the memories came in waves, unrelenting. you’d spent three years holding it all back: every ounce of heartbreak, every pang of humiliation, every question that would never be answered.
but tonight, the dam finally broke.
you thought about the way you stood there, waiting, believing with everything in you that she would show up. the way you smiled nervously at your parents, at hers, then to the guests who had all gathered to celebrate something that wasn’t real anymore.
the embarrassment, the pitying glances, the murmured apologies you had given when it wasn’t your fault — it all came rushing back, every detail sharper than it had been in years.
the door to the garden creaked open behind you, and you stiffened, trying to choke back the sounds of your crying. you didn’t want anyone to see you like this but the footsteps were soft, familiar and you knew who it was before you even looked up.
jimin.
she approached slowly, her shoes crunching lightly on the gravel. she didn’t say anything at first, just stopped a few feet away, her presence warm and steady. you didn’t look up nor acknowledged her, but you didn’t have to. she came closer, lowering herself to sit beside you on the bench.
at first, she didn’t touch you. she gave you space, her hands resting in her lap as she watched you silently. but when your sobs grew louder, your shoulders trembling uncontrollably, she shifted closer, wrapping an arm around you.
she had seen you leave the hospital, your steps hurried and your shoulders hunched as if you were carrying something too heavy for anyone to bear. she had followed, keeping her distance, not wanting to intrude but unable to let you be alone in whatever you were carrying.
“it’s okay,” she said softly, her voice steady and grounding. “let it out. i’m here.”
she’d never seen you like this. not even on that day three years ago. back then, you held yourself together, a picture of forced composure that betrayed none of what you were feeling.
you leaned into her without thinking, her warmth a comfort you hadn’t realised you needed. she wrapped her arms around you as the tears kept coming, her presence anchouring you in a way that words couldn’t.
she held you tightly, one hand rubbing slow, soothing circles on your back, the other resting against your head. she didn’t say anything, didn’t try to stop you. she just let you fall apart.
it felt like hours passed before your sobs began to subside, your breathing slowing into uneven gasps. you pulled back slightly, wiping at your face with trembling hands.
you didn’t dare look at her, too ashamed of your outburst.
“why do you do this?” you finally said, your voice hoarse and broken.
jimin frowned, tilting her head. “do what?”
“this,” you said, gesturing weakly between the two of you. “why do you keep doing all these nice things for me? why do you care so much?”
her expression softened, but before she could answer, you kept going, your voice rising with frustration — not at her, but at yourself.
“i’m…fucking look at me, i’m damaged goods, jimin. she left me for a reason and that’s because i wasn’t enough for her. and if i wasn’t enough for her, how the hell could i ever be enough for you?”
she opened her mouth to speak, but you pressed on, the words pouring out of you like a dam had broken.
“you should be with someone who has their shit together, someone who isn’t this broken mess. i don’t need fixing and i sure as hell don’t want fixing. i’m not your project, jimin. i don’t deserve this. i don’t deserve you.”
the silence that followed felt deafening. your chest heaved, the weight of your own words leaving you feeling exposed and raw. you kept your eyes on the ground, unable to face her.
then, slowly, she reached out, fingers brushing against your cheek and cupped your face in her hands, her touch gentle but firm. she tilted your head up, forcing you to meet her gaze. her eyes were glassy, tears brimming at the edges but her expression was steady.
“y/n,” her soft voice was shaking slightly but full of conviction. “you don’t get to decide what i feel. and you don’t get to tell me what you deserve because i’ve already decided what you deserve. and that’s everything.
you blinked, stunned into silence as she continued.
“i love you,” she said, the words slipping out with a raw honesty that made your chest tighten. “i love you. not because you’re perfect, not because you’re some project i want to fix. i love you because you’re you.”
her thumbs brushed away the tears on your cheeks, her voice breaking as she went on. “you’re messy. you’re stubborn. you push people away because you’re scared, and you think it’s easier to be alone. but you’re also kind and strong and you care so much that it hurts you. and i love all of it. all of you.”
your breath hitched, your heart pounding as her words settled over you. “jimin, i —”
“no,” she interrupted gently, shaking her head. “let me finish. i know you don’t believe me right now. i know you don’t feel like you’re enough. but you are. to me, you are.”
her voice cracked again as she took a deep breath to steady herself. “and even if you can’t see it yet, i’ll wait. i’ll wait as long as it takes for you to realise that you are enough. that you’ve always been enough.”
tears blurred your vision again, but this time, they weren’t from sadness. you stared at her, unable to find the words, the weight of her confession leaving you breathless.
“jimin,” you finally whispered, your voice trembling. “i don’t know if i can —”
“you don’t have to,” she said softly, her hands still cradling your face. “not right now. not until you’re ready. but just…let me stay. let me be here for you. that’s all i’m asking.”
you nodded, the smallest of movements, but it was enough. she pulled you into her arms again, holding you tightly as your tears began to fall once more…not from grief, but from the overwhelming relief of not being alone anymore.
perhaps you didn’t have to carry everything on your own anymore.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the tiny apartment in lisbon was quiet, save for the distant sound of street vendors calling out to evening crowds.
minjeong sat cross-legged on the worn wooden floor, her back leaning against the peeling wall. the room was sparse; just a bed, a suitcase, and a second-hand lamp casting a dim glow. this was her life now, moving from one place to the next, never staying long enough to plant roots.
it had been three years since she left.
three years of running, of trying to escape the shadow of the person she used to be. it hadn’t worked. no matter where she went, the memories followed her, clinging to her like smoke.
she thought back to the day she ran away with mingyu. she still didn’t understand why she had done it. it felt like rebellion; breaking free from the cage of her life. he had offered her a way out, a chance to escape the constant grind of fame, the suffocating expectations of being winter of aespa. in her desperation, she’d taken it without thinking.
it had been a mistake — the worst one of her life.
two weeks. that was all it took for everything to fall apart. he wasn’t the solution to her problems; he was just another lost soul trying to fill his own emptiness. they argued constantly, their personalities clashing until every word between them felt like a fight.
the final straw had been a shouting match in a dingy motel room somewhere in melbourne. she packed her bag that night and walked away, leaving him without a goodbye.
but leaving him didn’t fix anything. the damage was already done.
minjeong had spent the next three years living like a ghost, drifting from one country to another, working odd jobs to make ends meet. she cleaned houses in barcelona, waited tables in florence and even worked as a gardener in interlaken. she learned to enjoy the simplicity of it all — the routine of making her own meals, the anonymity of blending into crowds.
for the first time in her life, she wasn’t winter; the idol. she was just minjeong, a girl trying to figure out who she was.
the solitude changed her. she learned to live without the luxury she took for granted, without the constant validation of fans or the adoration of the public. it was hard, but it forced her to confront herself, to look at the mess she had made and start picking up the pieces.
but no matter how much she grew, no matter how much she tried to move on, there was one thing she couldn’t escape: you.
you had been the best thing that ever happened to her. she didn’t deserve you, not then and certainly not now. but you had loved her anyway, in a way that no one else ever had.
when the pressure of fame had weighed her down, when she felt like she was suffocating under the expectations of the world, you had been her lifeline.
she thought about the nights you stayed up with her, holding her close when the world felt too big. she remembered the way you would look at her, like she was more than the perfect image she tried so hard to maintain.
you saw her; the messy, flawed, human version of her…and you loved her anyway.
you had saved her when she was drowning. and how did she repay you? by leaving. by walking away on your wedding day, the day she should have promised herself to you forever.
she thought she was sparing you the burden of her brokenness, but all she did was break you too.
she thought about aespa too. they had been her sisters. she had abandoned them without a word, leaving them to pick up the pieces of her absence. she often found herself scrolling through their social media profiles, her heart aching at the sight of aeri and yizhuo laughing together or jimin’s rare selfies.
but it was jimin’s posts that hurt the most.
jimin had been her best friend, the one who knew her better than anyone else. now, her life seemed to revolve around you. her posts were filled with snapshots of dinners, quiet moments and candid photos of you that made minjeong’s chest tighten.
you were still beautiful, even more so than she remembered. but there was something different about you now — an air of weariness and guardedness that hadn’t been there before.
she knew she was responsible for that, and it tore her apart.
the breaking point came one quiet afternoon. she was scrolling through her phone, her thumb idly swiping through posts, when an article caught her eye.
“aespa’s karina opens up about her romantic life: ‘we’re taking things slow, but it’s happening.’”
her breath hitched as she clicked the link, her heart pounding. the article detailed jimin’s recent interview, where she had spoken openly about someone she’d been seeing.
“i’ve been spending a lot of time with someone who means a lot to me,” she had said. “we’re working our way through things in a romantic setting, but very slowly. there’s a lot of healing involved for both of us. but…i’m happy. she’s worth it.”
the accompanying photo was of jimin and you, leaving a restaurant together. her hand rested lightly on your back, her expression soft, almost protective. you looked relaxed, even happy, but there was still a shadow of something unreadable in your eyes.
minjeong stared at the photo for a long time, her chest tight. jimin’s words echoed in her mind: “she’s worth it.”
she closed her phone and sat in silence, her hands trembling. the reality of what she lost hit her all at once — not just you, but the life you could have had together.
and now, jimin was stepping into the space she had abandoned.
that night, she booked a plane ticket to seoul.
it wasn’t a decision made lightly, but she couldn’t stay away any longer.
she needed to apologise; to you, her family, to everyone she had hurt. she didn’t know if you would forgive her, but she had to try.
no matter how much time had passed, one thing remained true: you were her soulmate. and she wasn’t ready to give up on you, not yet.
“minjeong?”
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the end.
#Spotify#kpop x reader#kpop gg#aespa x reader#aespa imagines#karina imagines#karina x reader#karina#winter x reader#winter imagines#kpop imagines#minjeong x reader#jimin x reader
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Imagine this for me, feel free to ignore this but it’s rotting in my brain 💀 some fluffy Fem!BAU reader x Aaron Hotchner pretty please 🙏🏻
Reader and another member of the team enter a suspected unsub’s house, working in biochemistry and bio weapons🧬🔬🧪, reader accidentally triggers some alarm/security system and gets sprayed w an unknown substance😱🤯
(anthrax for angst/hurt comfort, aphrodisiac for smut…..or for fluff like a laughing gas??)
n reader has to get checked out by medics n in the back of the ambulance or the hospital (in context of laughing gas) with extremely concerned Aaron, and miss girl cannot hold it together, cracking jokes, giggling at herself, Aaron and nothing in particular, BLATANTLY flirting with Aaron (who wouldn’t let’s be fr) n he’s tryna keep his professionalism so bad but cracks n says something she wasn’t supposed to hear, she replies with something along the lines of
“take me out on a date first, sir.”
The side effects lasting the entire flight back too so the whole team gets to witness reader all snuggled up to Aaron, complimenting him, pulling full on smiles out of him, making him blush- AAAAH pls I’m rattling the bars of my cage thinking about it
PLEASE 🫠🫠I’m hanging out for some tooth-rotting fluff, once again feel free to ignore,
Happy writing 💜💜
DANGEROUS - A.H
a/n: LOLOLOL i loved this request thank you so much i hope this is what you were wanting <3
masterlist
pairings: aaron hotchner x fem!reader
warnings: reader being persistent asf, home girl isn't backing down for NOTHING
wc: 1.3k
"Where is she?"
Hotch's words sliced through the sterile air of the ER, stripped of kindness or patience, devoid of his usual restraint. His presence seemed to consume the hallway, his tie loose, his brow drawn, and his composure unraveled in ways only you could cause.
Morgan intercepted him before he got too far.
"Hotch—cool it. She's okay." Hotch's glare could've sent anyone else running, but Morgan held his ground. "I get it. You're worried. But barging in there all hot-headed? Not gonna help."
"She's under observation," Morgan continued before Hotch could push past him. "Doc says whatever she got hit with isn't dangerous--just... weird. A little chemical happy hour, let's say. She's harmless and giggly."
Hotch's brows furrowed together, pushing past Morgan and opening the door to find you sprawled in the hospital bed.
The sight of you sent his heart into a freefall. Your cheeks were flushed, your hair was a mess, and your eyelids drooped like you'd been awake for hours—but you were alive. He scanned you quickly, searching for injuries, bruises, something tangible to explain why it still felt like the world had tilted off its axis. When he came up empty, a small weight lifted from his shoulders, but the tightness in his chest wouldn't let go.
"Hotch." Your voice, soft and a little slurred, tugged him out of his own head. You blinked up lazily up at him, a sleepy, crooked smile spreading across your lips. "Hey, you."
He frowned, his steps eating the distance between you. "How do you feel? What did the doctors say?"
You giggled—giggled. "I feel fantabulous, boss man. Why're you always so serious? It's kind of cute, though. You're cute."
"Cute?" He blinked, startled, as if the word was foreign coming from you. His brow creased in confusion, though his eyes betrayed the faintest trace of relief. "You're in a hospital bed because of a biochemical exposure. Nothing about this is remotely cute."
"Okay, okay, Captain Grumpy Pants." You patted the bed beside you, and for a moment he just stared. "Sit down before you pop a blood vessel."
"What did that chemical do to you?"
Your laughter bubbled up--bright, unrestrained, and completely inappropriate given the circumstances. "I dunno! But it's great. Like... fun. You should try it. Loosen up, Aaron!"
The casual drop of his first name hit him like a slap in the face, and you caught the split second of surprise before he could smother it. Grinning wider, you leaned forward, eyes twinkling like you'd discovered his Achilles' heel.
"You worried about me, Aaron? That's sweet. And for the record, you wear stress well. Very rugged. Broody Hotchner."
Hotch's jaw tensed visibly, a muscle jumping beneath his skin as he tried--and failed--not to react. He was sure he liked the sound of his name rolling off your tongue entirely more than was appropriate. "You're not making any sense."
"And you don't smile enough," you countered easily. "You've got this whole tall, dark, and scowly thing going on, but when you smile? Oh, man. Broody Hotchner becomes downright irresistible."
He stared at you, mouth slightly open like he'd forgotten how to respond. The blush that crept up his neck and toward his ears betrayed him, though he looked anywhere but at you.
"Rugged and speechless?" Your grin spread wider. "Oh, this is definitely my new favorite hobby."
He said your name, low and clipped--a warning and a plea all wrapped into one.
You waved him off, giggling as you propped your chin in your hand, the faintest smirk tugging at your lips. "Oh, lighten up. Admit it—you like me. I'm the best part of your day."
Before he could even form a reply, the door creaked open, and Emily stepped in. "She's cleared to go. The jet's ready. You'll have to wrangle her out of here, though."
Hotch straightened immediately, thankful for the interruption. You, on the other hand, poured dramatically. "Aww, we were just getting to the good part."
"Let's go," Hotch muttered, ignoring Emily's obvious smirk as he grabbed your bag from the chair and stepped closer to the bed. When you didn't move, he gave you a look--a look you were all too familiar with. "Up."
"Look at you. So polite," you teased, sliding your hands into his as he helped you sit upright.
Hotch didn't answer, just looped an arm under yours as he coaxed you to your feet. You swayed for a second--just enough to make him grab your other elbow. His movements were careful--surprisingly gentle for someone with such sharp edges. "Easy."
"You're just so reliable." You were leaning into his side more than you probably needed to. "See this is why I think you like me."
"You can think whatever you want as long as you keep walking."
Emily grinned as the two of you passed. "Smooth, Hotch. Real smooth."
--
The low rumble of the jet engines filled the cabin, but Hotch wasn't hearing any of it. All of his attention was on you--curled up on the seats, hands waving animatedly as you grinned at your captive audience, chatting nonstop like a queen addressing her subjects. Morgan and Reid were clearly enjoying the show.
"No, no, Spencer, you're not hearing me." You sat up with exaggerated effort, poking Reid's arm as if to emphasize your point. "If you combined your brain with Derek's charm, you'd be unstoppable. A super-agent. Like, Avengers level."
Reid's face flushed immediately, and Morgan barked out a laugh. "See, I told you, Pretty Boy—everyone's gotta have a little charm."
"I'm plenty charming," Spencer grumbled, though the small, amused smile gave away how he really felt.
Hotch leaned back in his seat, hands folded tightly in his lap, but his focus never left you. He was beyond exhausted, the weight of the last few hours settling heavy in his bones, but still, he refused to tear his eyes away. It wasn't rational, but the thought of looking away--even for a second--felt like it might undo having you here, safe and whole.
You noticed. Of course you did.
The pout that appeared on your face was immediate. "Hotch! You're all the way over there. That's too far."
He blinked, his heart stumbling for just a moment, your tone cracking through his carefully constructed walls. "I'm fine where I am."
"But I'm not," you whined, shifting toward the edge of your seat and looking far too pleased with yourself. "C'mon, boss man. Sit with me."
Morgan leaned into Reid with a grin. "She's relentless, man."
Hotch shot Morgan a quick glare before standing, crossing the cabin with deliberate strides. He lowered himself stiffly onto the seat next to you, his posture straight as a board. "Happy now?"
"Mm-hmm," you hummed, sliding closer and resting your head on his shoulder with hesitation.
He started to say your name, but you cut him off with a content sigh. "You're warm. Did anyone ever tell you you're like a human space heater? Very cozy, Hotchner."
Hotch swallowed. "You need to rest."
"I am resting. You're just really nice to lean on." You tilted your head up, peaking at him with half-lidded eyes. "You're handsome too. Did I mention that already? Like...impossibly handsome. It's a little unfair."
He froze. Completely and utterly froze. His hands hovered awkwardly over his knees, unsure of where to go as you snuggled closer, completely oblivious to the predicament you were putting him in. He could feel the team watching--Morgan's smirk, Emily's barely contained laughter, even Reid's curious glances--but none of them dare to say a word.
He said your name once again, this time softer, but you were already gone, eyes slipping shut, breath evening out as you dozed off against him.
Professional. He needed to be professional. He repeated the word in his head like a mantra, but with you pressed so contentedly against him, it felt like a losing battle.
And then he caught it--your perfume. Soft, faintly floral, and as familiar to him as the sound of your voice. It was the same scent he'd picked up in stolen moments: when you walked by his desk, leaving a hint of it behind, or leaned over his shoulder during a briefing. He'd grown used to it, let it blur into the background like everything else about you he shouldn't notice.
But now? Now it was inescapable, a subtle, dizzying distraction that tugged at what little composure he had left.
His chest tightened as an irrational thought hit him--what it would be like to have this forever. To breathe in your scent every morning instead of just in passing. To have you against him not as a fleeting accident but as a choice. He had no business entertaining these thoughts--thoughts of how easy it would be to have you like this all the time.
And that? That was dangerous.
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#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x fem reader#aaron hotchner fluff#criminal minds#criminal minds fic
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indebted
dark!joel x f!reader. one shot.
main masterlist | ao3 | kofi
summary: you're having a bad day. one you think is getting better once a rough around the edges man comes to your rescue. you didn't expect it would takes such a sharp turn for the worse. first person pov reader. 9.2k words.
warnings: 18+ MDNI! DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT! NON CONSENUAL SEXUAL ACTS, READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION, pervy, sleazy, and foul mouthed joel. degradation, sexual favors, forced oral and piv, virgin reader, corruption, innocence, and daddy kinks featured. biiig ol' age gap (reader's age not mentioned other than "young" but i imagine her as 18-20 as she has a relatively immature attitude, imagining joel 50-55), this is not for everyone and that's okay. i'm not responsible for the content you consume.
a/n: i had some hormonal induced insanity and came up with this. i had a great time trying out a new pov for writing fic! enjoy him as much as i did, friends 🖤 and thanks @joelstummy for the amazing freaky beta work!
I’ll be the first person to admit now that what I’ve been doing is stupid. Dangerous. Idiotic. The list goes on. I can hear my father’s stern, militant voice in the back of my head, telling me as much. Except now he likely won’t get the chance to relish in it because I’m going to die here. Way out here where nobody will find my body, and I’ll be just another person that went missing in the QZ, never to be seen again. But this time, it’s not some sleazy FEDRA scheme and coverup or a smuggling deal gone wrong.
It’s utterly and completely my fault.
Sneaking out wasn’t meant to become a habit, but after the first few times, I lost the fear and adrenaline that had burned hot through my veins at those first steps of freedom. I craved it again, so I kept going further. And further. Away from civilization as I knew it, until the cluster of buildings known as the Quarantine Zone became a tiny speck in the distance. Out here was desolation, nothingness, only abandoned buildings to explore. The infected were another story, but I started to learn routes that helped me avoid encounters with them.
It helped clear my mind after a while, this newly found sense of adventure. All I’d ever known was a cage, a walled city that had become so mundane I felt my insides starting to rot from the listlessness of it all. My father was important - top in the rankings - I knew that, and it was all the more reason to keep me safely locked away while the city stirred with chatter of an uprising against FEDRA.
He never bothered to check on me much, anyways, making my little forays quite easy. Once I’d persuaded enough people with ration cards, they’d shown me the tunnel leading to freedom. Well, that tunnel, then another, a ladder to climb back up to the surface, and only then could I go through a precarious hole in a chain link fence. That was the smuggler’s route, they said, an easy ticket to getting in and out without being noticed.
I’d been abusing it, staying out for days at a time, never able to drink in enough of this quiet solitude that was of my own choosing, not my father’s. I couldn’t quite figure out what hole inside of me I was trying to fill, but I’d be damned if I stopped trying.
However, today seemed to be my last chance to try at all. His footsteps had been quiet - so quiet - approaching behind me. An old store, full of half decayed plushies, molded candies, and other adorable things from lives long put in the past, had called to me, distracted me. The arm around my throat, constricting, the other coming up to put a hand over my mouth. A dirty, putrid smell encompassing everything as I sputtered against him. This is it, I’d thought. What a waste.
I scream and fight against the strong hold he has on me, a nasty sneer right against my skin. “What’s some fresh meat like you doing waaaay out here, huh?” a dark voice rattles into my ear.
I scream behind his dirty palm in response, kicking my legs back at him. I should have learned more self defense, but who needs it when you’ve spent most of your life safely tucked away with your family name as your biggest protector?
“You smell good… real good…” The creep’s voice buzzes by me as he takes a deep breath in, making me shudder. One swift kick and I’m sure this is it, the one to knock him senseless and let me escape. He’s smart for how distracted he seems to be by my scent, and he’s one step ahead of me. My legs are kicked out from underneath me as I rear one back, and I fall to the ground, the man coming down with me to sit on my back, straddling my body in a fluid motion. He grips my hands behind my back, leaving me helpless in my fight, kicking and screaming. I’m ice and heat all at once, my body burning in a frozen blaze, my fight or flight quickly turning to fawn as his weight presses down on me.
“You can have anything in my backpack, anything! Please, let me go! I - I don’t want any trouble,” I choke out pathetically, hating how my voice comes out in shaky waves. This isn’t how to appeal to people like this, people who have lost their sense of humanity, evident by the way he’s now grinding himself down onto my jean clad asscheeks.
A laugh comes out of him that would haunt me as evil incarnate for the rest of my days if I wasn’t so sure that I was going to die at the hands of this man after he was done with me. “We both know I don’t give a fuck about any damn backpack of yours. I don’t want any trouble either, sweet cheeks, I just think you’d have a lot of fun with me and my friends. But mostly me,” he replies with the hint of a wink in his voice.
My stomach clenches, sickness rolling in that is only furthered as the man leans down, cloaking me with his large form. I can’t turn enough to see him, to even know what this violation of a man looks like, but his energy is beyond hideous as I catch a glimpse of his yellowing teeth in a grin before he pushes my head down to the cracked linoleum tiles. My hair tangled in his fingers, he holds me down hard, and I struggle to breathe as he crushes me beneath him.
“Now, are you gonna come easily, or do I need to do things the hard way? Either way is fine with me, for a fine piece of ass like this. In fact, I might prefer it the hard way, but we’d hate to ruin this pretty skin of yours, wouldn’t we?” He says slowly, pressing the cold blade of a knife to my throat.
“O-okay, okay,” I acquiesce, stopping my squirming, just needing a bit of room to breathe, my lungs heavy inside my chest. My panic only makes my chest tighter, even when the man leans back the tiniest bit. I had hoped that my sudden compliance would get that knife off my throat, but it hasn’t. “Just don’t hurt me… please…” I whimper.
He lets out a long, ragged sigh. “Afraid I can’t promise that.”
I’ve never felt fear like this, such certainty that I was about to be ruined, my life as I know it changing without a chance to even look back. I squeeze my eyes shut and brace for it, for anything he’s about to do next, finally accepting that there isn’t any appealing to scummy men in a scummy world. But nothing comes except for a muffled crack ringing through the air, and then a thud as the entire weight of my adversary falls on top of me, crushing. Something warm has splattered on my skin, my face, then starts to coat my jacket, seeping through. I shake violently, begging my body to catch a full breath under the weight of him.
Then as suddenly as it happened, it stops, the body yanked off of me and tossed to the side with ease. The deafening thud of his entire weight onto the ground is stark. I flip over and scramble backwards, grabbing the knife that had fallen from the man’s hand in his swift, final moment. Holding up a shaky hand, I grip the knife tightly, looking up to face a brutish, tall man with overgrown hair of chestnut and gray. A trim beard with the same coloring wraps around his tightly set jaw. He’s all wide shoulders, thick arms, broad chest, and my senses go on high alert again. His gun is practically still smoking as it hangs at his side, an active threat.
“Y’alright?” he drawls, thick and deep, echoing through the abandoned shop. One step closer to me has the knife practically flailing as I struggle to calm my hands, a strained hum alongside my shaky breathing the only sound I seem capable of making.
“Put that thing down,” he says calmly, almost exasperated. His stance slackens, one knee pushed out as he sizes me up. I’m likely the most miserable looking thing he’s seen in a while, I’m sure. “You’re harmless.”
“H-how do I know you’re not with him?” I blurt out.
My gruff savior lifts his brows incredulously. “That guy?” he asks, motioning impatiently to the dead body only a foot away. “Think I’d be puttin’ a bullet right in his skull if he was my best buddy?”
My eyes dance over him as I think. He has a point, and he did just save me from whatever debauched things that stranger’s mind had been conjuring up.
“Y-yeah, you have a point,” I finally say. He steps closer, and this time, I let him, putting the knife down. He motions with an authoritarian air for me to push it away, and I obey immediately, flinging it across the room.
“Poor fucker died with a hard on, didn’t he?” The man muses as his boots thud on the way over to the body, kicking it slightly as if to check, letting it roll back before turning his attention on me. “Now, are you usually this stupid, comin’ into hunter territory, or what?” he asks, reaching a hand down to me, presumably to help me up.
“I didn’t know…” I mumble, letting his hand hang there. He doesn’t snatch it back right away, although I can tell he wants to, that he’s already beyond exasperated by his day and the last thing he’d wanted was a damsel in distress like me. I hate that he’s proving all the things I’d been trying to disprove about myself by coming out on these solo trips into the great, big outside. I’m weak. Dependent. Needy. It makes my skin crawl with self loathing and frustration.
“Didn’t know, huh? So just clueless, then?” the man spits out, staring down at me with darkened eyes that make me turn my head away in shame. At my sullen silence, he seems to soften a little. “I’m Joel,” he says, an offering to go along with his outstretched hand.
I sigh, taking it and telling him my own name. I’m up on my feet, dusting myself off and looking at him shyly now. I don’t know what people are supposed to say when someone saves their life, so I just mumble, “Thank you.”
Joel snorts, nodding in acknowledgment as he crouches to pat down the body, seeming to come up short of anything interesting. “Don’t thank me yet,” he says, standing back to his full, towering height, glancing around with sharp eyes. “We should move.”
I might be as stupid as he says, because I wordlessly start to follow him towards the door. His hand stretches out behind him, open and inviting me in as he checks outside the door with a careful peek, his gun held tightly in the other. I stare down at it in disbelief. “C’mon, I don’t bite,” he sighs, that perpetual vexation in his tone again as he twitches his brows at me. “Need you close by. An’ it seems you have a tendency to go where you shouldn’t.”
My cheeks grow hot at the harsh truth of it, and I grasp his hand without any further objections, marveling for a moment at the way it envelops mine. All calloused and hard, mine soft and unused for labor of any kind.
“I’ve got a safehouse not too far from here.”
“A safehouse?”
“It’s already gettin’ dark. There ain’t no way we’re making it back to the QZ today, princess,” he retorts quickly, the pet name mocking on his tongue.
“How’d you know?” I ask softly, disappointment pressing in on my shoulders.
He chuckles out more of a snort, pulling me around a bend, slowly leaving behind the dangerous territory that I’d unknowingly encroached on. “You’re a FEDRA princess if I’ve ever seen one,” he tells me, and my heart sinks that I was so easy to read. I’d seen how capable this man Joel was, but damn was he was astute, more than I’d given him credit for.
I chew at my lip. “Fair enough,” I mumble under my breath, letting him take his well earned win. The longer I hang onto Joel’s hand, letting him expertly weave me through the barren streets, the safer I start to feel. He knows where he’s going, a practiced route he’s taken countless times, and it hits me then that this man is a smuggler. He has to be.
“Are you a smuggler?” I ask pointedly. “I’ve heard that people like that come in and out of the QZ.”
Joel falters for just a brief second, giving me a wily grin. “Look who’s readin’ who now,” he says with a dry chuckle. “Ain’t gonna run and tell your daddy, are you?”
I shake my head, pressing my lips together in a smile. “I can keep a secret.” In fact, I like keeping secrets from my father, hence the sneaking out, so Joel can count on me to never rat him out.
His amused grin in response lights a little flame akin to friendship inside of me. This grumpy old bastard could smile after all. “Just through here,” he says, letting the smile drop, taking a sharp left down a street just as a sprinkle of rain starts to fall on us. It’s a less urban area - more like a neighborhood - sprouted with apartment buildings and abandoned, vine covered cars. It’s my favorite thing about all the exploration I’ve been doing, seeing the way nature can reclaim anything and make it her own.
The cracked street below us makes me tread carefully, lagging behind as Joel’s hand tugs me along urgently. We turn down an alley, Joel whipping his head left to right before dragging me behind him, finally dropping my hand to open a door that leads right into a tiny lobby and a stairwell. He runs a hand through his damp hair, slicking it back some - a rather handsome look for him, now that I’m thinking about it. I try to ignore that thought as his voice booms through the empty room.
“Up,” he commands, gripping my hand again and leading us up the stairs.
My stomach sinks a little when he takes out a key, unlocking a padlock on one of the apartments numbered 405 and pushing the old, chipped door inwards. I have no reason not to trust Joel, he saved my life afterall, but I can’t shake the nerves I feel from being in an unfamiliar place with an unfamiliar man. It’s quiet here, likely nobody in the vicinity but the two of us.
“Home sweet home,” he grunts out, dropping his backpack and gun holster near the door and shrugging off his damp jacket, leaving him in a plain tee shirt that hugs his muscular frame. It’s a small, cramped apartment with a living room and kitchen directly next to it, a little window cut into the wall, peering in on the living room from above the stove. It looks as if it’s left exactly as it was years ago, full of furniture and clutter, only a vessel for Joel to use without making it his own at all. I peer past to see a small hallway I can only assume leads to a bedroom and bathroom.
“Know it ain’t the palace you’re probably used to, but we’ll be safe an’ dry here,” he say, and I roll my eyes behind his back. If Joel thinks that I live in a palace, he’s clearly misunderstood the state that the QZ is in. My father’s house is spacious, sure, but it’s just as dilapidated as the rest of the city. The only difference is the level of protection afforded to our homes.
He ambles into the kitchen, rummaging through the cabinets with a clatter, then comes back moments later with an open can of beans and two forks. I’m still standing in the entryway, unsure of what to do with myself.
“Hungry?” he asks gruffly, and I shake my head, wide eyed. I’d lost my appetite the minute that man had grabbed me earlier, and I couldn’t seem to get it back. Joel shrugs, digging in with a messy forkful of from the can. “Your funeral,” he says, chewing.
Joel sinks down onto the couch with a tiny groan, setting down the can on the side table next to his armrest, giving the other cushion an expectant look. “Well, you gonna sit your ass on down an’ tell me why the hell I had to save it today, or what? Why the hell you’re wanderin’ around like it’s a free for all out there?”
I flinch slightly at his harsh tone, but gingerly step my way into the room, unzipping my jacket and shedding it. For the chill outside, the temperature inside the apartment is more comfortable than I’d expect, my skin welcoming the change. Joel eyes my thin tee shirt, and I feel a flash of heat sweep my skin before I feel the prickle of goosebumps, knowing my nipples are poking through the fabric. His eyes catch there before he promptly averts them.
I sit precariously next to Joel on the loveseat, pressed as far away as I can from him, not wanting to cramp his personal space. But he seems to have no problem with that anyways, his legs spread wide open in a comfortable stance, leaned back against the cushions. He pinches the bridge of his nose, eyes shut for a moment as he awaits my answer.
“I was… exploring,” I say simply, cringing at how ridiculous it sounds coming out of my mouth. Who leaves perfect safety to wander around in a dangerous world on purpose? For no other reason than curiosity and a sudden, rebellious sense of defiance?
His eyes snap open, head pulling up from the couch, turning my way. “Explorin’…” He mulls on the word, slowly licking his lips before pursing them. “You’re tellin’ me I had to save a FEDRA brat today ‘cause she was explorin’? You really are stupid. ‘Course you are, look how young y’are. Look how fuckin’... sheltered.” Joel throws his hands up, landing them on his thighs with a soft thud, sighing. “Can’t even blame ya.”
I pluck up every bit of courage I have, glaring at him with narrowed eyes. “Look, it was really nice of you to save me and everything, and I do thank you for it. I’m sorry if I messed up whatever… smuggling stuff you had going on today, but I’d appreciate it if you didn’t call me… stupid.” The last word is quiet, mousy, and I turn my head down, eyes shining with unshed tears that I silently curse myself for. My father’s voice rings through my head - you stupid girl! - making me shudder.
Joel sucks at his teeth. “Hit a nerve, I see,” he says passively. “Alright, I’m sorry kiddo. I just mean, you’re puttin’ yourself at risk doin’ what you’re doin’, and it ain’t a smart idea. Yeah?”
“Yeah,” I sigh out, relaxing a little. “I just needed to get away.”
“From your dear old daddy?” he teases, picking up the can, shoveling several more bites into his mouth. I go silent, picking at a thread on the couch rather than answer him. “Ah, another nerve, I see. Daddy issues. Could’ve guessed that one.”
“I don’t have -”
“Sweetheart…” Joel interrupts, looking at me from under his brows, pulling his lip between his teeth, seeming to look at me in a fresh light. It sends my skin tingling, the way he eyes me, a glint in his stare. It seems to prove his point, the way a pet name from a middle aged man seems to immobilize me against my will. I want to slap the smug look off his face, but I have no grounds to do so, only grumbling quietly with my cheeks blazing in embarrassment. A prickle of something else works its way deep into my belly, something warm at how his scrutinizing eyes flick over my body, the lines in his face set, showing his age, his experience.
“Take a piece of advice from a man probably as old as your daddy, then. Trust me when I say that outside those walls ain’t the place to find what you’re lookin’ for. The sooner you let go of that notion, the better off you’ll be.”
Frustration blooms hot in my chest, overpowering whatever the hell that sudden, unwanted feeling was. I’m tired of people dictating what I can and can’t do, what I’m capable of. “People do it all the time - smugglers - you would know,” I retort. “I’ve been doing it for months. Never had a problem until today. It was just some bad luck.”
“Bad luck? Really? You’d be that man’s newest little cock sleeve if it weren’t for me savin’ your ass,” Joel growls, standing up off the couch. I wince at his vulgar language, the picture it paints in my mind of what life might have been like if Joel hadn’t happened to be in the right place at the right time.
“I - I know - I’m sorry,” I blurt out, feeling my hands start to go shaky. “Thank you, Joel, I really - I really do owe you. Everything.”
“Like I said, don’t thank me yet.” He steps over so that he’s in front of me, using his boot to part my legs, scooting them apart and standing between them. “Think I did all this out of the kindness of my heart, did you? Didn’t think that maybe I was after the same damn thing as buddy boy earlier?”
I’m like a fish out of water, the way my lips move with no sound coming out. “Joel…” I breathe out in warning, in questioning. I see his arms strain in his t-shirt, hands flexing open and closed.
“I can’t say the thought ain’t crossin’ my mind now. You are mighty pretty. And you do owe me a favor. One big ol’ gigantic favor, for savin’ your backside.” He brushes his fingers along his jeans, palming his crotch for a brief second before leaning forward, caging me in on the couch with hands on either side of me, pressing into the cushions. My heart hammers in my chest so loud I expect Joel can hear it, can feel the fear taking hold of me. He bares his teeth above me like a wild animal, and now I’m certain he can smell my fear too, that he thrives on it.
“You know what? Maybe you were bound to find what you were lookin’ for outside those walls. Maybe that’s what you needed, is it? Couldn’t find any love from daddy back home, so you wanted to find someone to turn you into their own personal little play thing. Poor baby just needed some attention, did she? Sad, really.”
My hands tremble, my words lost as I can only breathe in shaky little breaths, shaking my head violently. How can this god forsaken day keep getting worse?
“Please -” I mumble out, bringing a jittery hand up to my mouth. Joel slaps it away, gripping my chin harshly at first, inspecting me before his thumb brushes over my bottom lip. I’d think it was gentle, caring, even, if not for the nasty look spreading across his face, the grin that darkens it along with his eyes.
“Time to put this pretty thing to better use and show how grateful you are to ol’ daddy Joel,” he says, using his free hand to deftly unbuckle his belt, the jangling sound like a death knell, making my throat go dry. “Promise I’ll be much better than he would’ve been earlier. People say I’m… a generous lover.” His drawl is slow and calculated, voice deep with lust, the sly smirk turning to a triumphant grin as he chuckles, amusing himself.
He grips the top of my head, pushing me to slide down the couch cushions into a slump as I struggle, powerless against a man of his strength. He positions himself higher up to bring the giant denim bulge right in my view. I wince, trying to turn my head away as his zipper comes undone, his hand grasping deep into the fly of his jeans, yanking his cock out. When it springs free, I gasp as he lets it slap me in the face. Hot, throbbing, and massive, leaking a shiny bead of precum that had ended up somewhere on my cheek. I sit stunned and held in place by his rough hand.
The cold hard fact hits me that this is the first time I’m ever going to experience intimacy of any kind. Hell, I’ve only had one kiss before, and it was when I was ten years old, with a boy belonging to one of my father’s friends, a name I can’t even remember now. The first penis I’m ever seeing is right here, right now, in a context I have had zero control over. It’s thicker than I’d imagined one could be, softer too as I look at the skin of it. Veins run along the sides and bottom, all leading up to an imposing, angry pink head at the tip, practically bursting as it awaits me. It’s magnificent and terrifying at the same time, nothing like what I’d expected based on the half-assed health classes provided by schooling in the QZ. Sex has always had a shroud of mystery for me, and I never imagined that all those secrets, long awaited, would be uncovered like this. A dingy bedroom, a man likely almost three times my age, and me as an unwilling participant. Desperation swiftly grips my chest as I realize I actually have no clue what goes on behind closed doors between two people, and I have a feeling I’m about to find out in the crudest of ways.
The fearful innocence I know is about to be stolen from me causes tears to sting at my eyes, fat little droplets that instantly start to roll down my cheeks, leaking onto Joel’s large fingers still gripped around my chin. I start to struggle, my body seeming to catch up with my mind, loud warning sirens of DANGER! DANGER! finally blaring out in a panic. When I squirm, Joel plants one of his knees into my body, keeping himself balanced while still being able to hold me down.
“Don’t cry now, honey, it’ll only make him harder.” He sneers as he strokes his cock, slapping the head against my closed lips a few times. He wrenches my jaw down, forcing it open. “Nice ‘n wide for this big boy, there we go,” he says, not waiting a moment longer to barge his cock past the opening while he has it.
He groans loudly as he shoves several inches in right from the get go, his eyes nearly rolling back in his head. The hand that had been holding my jaw presses in on my shoulder, holding me in place. I’d have nowhere to go, anyways, with his knee on my thighs, his entire body caging me in, the cushions giving me no leeway to the way his cock is forcefully intruding, inch by inch down my throat. The taste is all consuming - a little salty, a little ripe, tasting like days of Joel’s old sweat, but it’s not completely bad, not what I’d have expected. It’s heady in a strange way, clouding my mind as I try to cope with the fullness in my mouth.
The next moment I sputter, my eyes popping open wide, flooded with tears as he hits the back of my throat. I try to gasp for air and I find that I can’t. This is torture of some form, it must be. Full panic follows, where I try to move, but every avenue is pinned down in some way by Joel’s massive body. I weakly flap at him with my hands but it barely even deters him from rocking his hips in and out, choking me again on the thrust inwards as the back of my throat tightens, gagging around his thick girth.
“Open up, relax your goddamn throat,” Joel hisses at me, keeping his cock pressed fully to the back of my throat, constricting any airflow I was hoping to have. I finally breathe shakily out of my nose when he pulls back just enough, only to slide it in slowly, his eyes carefully watching me. I glance up for the first time at him from below, hoping to find any shred of humanity he might have for me, but I’m met with an icy, dark gaze clouded with lust, power.
“Gonna fuck your face now, like the dumb little slut you are. This is what stupid girls get for wanderin’ around by themselves. This is what they ask for.” He punctuates the last words with a sharp thrust inwards, my entire body convulsing with the gag I sputter out around him, drool pooling around my stretched lips. I would whimper if I could, if I even had the air to do so.
Joel is relentless for the next few moments, rapid thrusts in and out of my mouth, my head held conveniently in place against the couch cushions for him. He groans deeply, his pleasure evident while I’m just trying to get my next breath in. I time them expertly, learning as I go, letting him continue to take from me to gain his own pleasure.
“That’s it, that’s right, you’re turnin’ into quite the good girl,” Joel mutters above me, rolling his hips with vigor and making me gag again. I can feel drool dribbling down my chin, my neck, landing on my chest, and it makes me feel ashamed, embarrassed, and a twinge of something else. I can’t tell as Joel grunts, pumping himself in and out of my gruesomely contorted jaw, if the fact that it’s something even remotely sexual has me feeling things I shouldn’t. My cheeks burn hot as my eyes continue to water - how much of it is crying and how much of it is just my body’s response to him hitting the back of my throat, I don’t know.
Then he surprises me by slowing down, languid strokes of his cock in and out with sloppy sounds, a soft hand landing on my head, stroking before bundling my hair in his fist tightly. “Knew you’d have such a filthy little mouth for daddy,” he coos, rolling his hips forward a little further, touching the back of my throat with his cock.
My body spasms a little when he keeps pushing, grumbling quiet groans of approval. My eyes squeeze shut, leaking out an onslaught of tears. I don’t want to see the aftermath if it ends up that it’s one gag too many and the inevitable happens. But to my surprise, he keeps slipping down, intruding on my throat. I try to keep my trembling body still, wanting to keep my throat relaxed, terrified of what might happen if I fight this. Can a person die this way? Could I really choke to death on this man’s dick?
“Jesus fuck. Lord have fuckin’ mercy…” Joel breathes out as he pushes even further. “Swallowin’ him down, aren’t ya? Feel me right in here, I bet.” I flinch when he touches his hand to the column of my throat, wrapping his fingers softly around the flesh. When he starts to retreat, the choking is back in a second, but Joel holds me by the throat, keeping my neck craned back, returning to the brutal way he’d been abusing my mouth. I groan and sputter and try to cough through all of it, my mouth stuffed full over and over again before I can get a breath in.
He’s relentless, and then it stops all at once, his cock popping out from between my lips with a wet, lewd sound. A stream of drool follows, a gush that dribbles down onto my already soaked shirt, and I cough violently, my hands flailing to clutch at my chest.
As soon as the pressure of Joel’s body lifts off of me, I’m scrambling to somewhere, anywhere else, my limbs stiff and achy, my jaw panging with a soreness I’ve never felt before. He stands in front of me, one hand shooting out to grab the collar of my shirt before I can even get fully off the couch, pulling me close.
“Does it look like you’re done showin’ your gratitude yet?” he growls out, gripping the back of my head and forcing me to look down at his cock, still standing at full attention, shiny and dripping with saliva. I swallow hard, the lump painful on the way down. Joel shakes my head for me, the burn at my scalp making me wince. He presses his hips flush with mine, forcing his erection against my thigh before slipping it between them. He leans in close, hot breath ghosting over my face before his lips brush mine.
“You do make a pretty cocksleeve, y’know. Suckin’ cock like a cheap whore, wonder if you take it the same way in your cunt.”
I whimper, shaking my head, the tears non-stop as they roll down my cheeks. “Please… don’t. You don’t have to do this…”
Joel scoffs. “If I put my hand down your pants to that pretty little snatch, tell me I wouldn’t find you wet right now.” He punctuates the words with a sharp pull on my scalp. I cry out, lip quivering, trying to shake my head. “Don’t lie t’me after I’ve been so, so generous t’you today.”
I’m spinning around, a dizzying sensation, Joel’s strong bicep brought across my chest as his other hand delves below my waistline, plunging deep, right to my cotton panties, bypassing the waistband of those, too. Without care, without any sense of boundaries, his fingers explore, slipping through my sensitive slit with ease. I yelp, squirming at the intrusion, and Joel’s deep chuckle behind me confirms what I already knew, what I was beyond confused by.
“Thought so,” he says gruffly, then he cups my entire mound, giving an almost comforting sensation, holding his hand tightly pressed to it. “Nothin’ to be upset about, we’re just havin’ a little fun, payin’ off your debt to dear ol’ Joel, okay?”
I shake my head. “I - I shouldn't be here… it shouldn’t be like this,” I whisper in a cracking voice, hanging my head low as the tears just keep coming, damn them.
Joel’s fingers start to move slowly, just starting with one, stroking gently up my lips, spreading my slickness around. I’m surprised that it feels good, a pleasant little tingle zipping right to my core that I quickly lament, hating myself for it. “What shouldn’t be like this, hm? That you shouldn’t like my cock down your throat? It’s perfectly natural, doll,” he says, somehow soft and condescending in the same breath.
“A-all of this,” I whimper, “Please, j-just let me go. I w-won’t say anything, I won’t do anything. I just…”
Joel quietly shushes me, letting his finger do the talking for a moment. It drags up to my clit, rubbing tiny, enticing little circles. I bite my lip hard, enough to taste copper, trying to suppress the moan climbing its way up from my chest.
“It’s okay, it’s okay that it feels good. It’s ‘sposed to. Good little sluts like you don’t know any better, don’t care what it is that’s gettin’ their panties wet. Desperate,” he growls, fingers sliding through the slick mess that’s now drooling onto the cotton. “Just relax, let it happen…” I feel his breath, hot on my ear, before he nibbles, biting down hard on the earlobe, tugging it with his teeth. It bursts out, the whimpering moan I’d been holding back, just as he pinches my clit at the same time as the bite.
He laughs. He has the nerve to laugh and it sends a shiver down my spine, my brain muddled and confused and turned on by the eroticism at play here. He soothes me by nuzzling my neck, taking a long, deep breath in. I squirm as Joel’s hand retreats, and I wonder for just a moment, a brief, all consuming moment, if maybe he’s seen reason. When his fingers find the buttons of my jeans, my heart plummets to depths previously unknown as he unbuttons them, pulling the zipper down slowly, the only sound in the room his harsh breathing right on my neck.
“Please, I gave you what you want already,” I beg once more, feeling it fall on deaf ears as Joel tugs my jeans down, revealing my pink cotton panties. They’re my favorite pair - were my favorite pair - a rare find in a world like this. Pretty pale pink with a nice lacy trim and a little bow at the front. Only now, they’d belong to Joel.
Joel clicks his tongue in approval of the sight, pulling his head back to peer at my underwear from the back before his hand grips my ass, jiggling it roughly. “Oh, you’re jus’not getting it, are you? You feel this?” he asks angrily, letting me feel the hard length of his cock pressed to my ass cheeks, threatening to slip between my thighs. “This means you didn’t give me nearly half of what I want yet. He’s still achin’ for ya, princess.”
I grit my teeth, hating the pet name, the way he’s using who I am to mock me. It’s a low blow. I hated everything to do with being associated with my father - I knew he wasn’t a good man - and I hated most that it was so obvious to a stranger which echelon of society I belonged to. If I was so important, where were they now, huh? I want to scream those words at him, but instead I just feel my legs tremble underneath me, my knees feeling like jelly as they almost give out on me.
“Please!” I struggle against his hold, but it only makes him grip my ass tighter, hard enough to bruise. “I-I’m a virgin,” I suddenly squeak out, unsure of why I say it other than some last ditch effort to deter him. My heart pounds as he stills, dead silent with his hand grasping my ass like it’s his next meal, like he owns it.
“Well ain’t it my lucky day. Shit, that’s why you were sputterin’ all over my damn cock, ain’t it?” he says as the epiphany dawns on him, laughing. My cheeks blaze hotter and hotter, hating that I’m even embarrassed at my lack of experience and skills, like I have some sick need to impress him. He notices my tension, my head hanging low as I cry new tears, and says, “Hey, hey, nothin’ to be ashamed for. In fact…” His hand fists in my underwear, tight and unrelenting. I feel his cock press against my ass again, harder than ever before it slips between my thighs. “Makes me awful excited,” he purrs, bringing his mouth to my ear again.
I only give him a timid whimper in reply, squeezing my eyes shut as I realize there is nothing I can do to stop this man. He thinks I’m a cheap whore, and he loves it. I’m a pure virgin, and he loves it even more.
He squeezes me tighter to his chest, my back starting to sweat through my thin tee shirt. “The hell were you savin’ yourself for anyways? Marriage? A sweet pussy like this?” At my silence, he cups my pussy hard, letting the dampness of my underwear soak into his palm. “Answer me!” he barks out.
“I - I wasn’t! I don’t know!” I cry out, trembling.
“Well,” he says, fisting my panties again, starting to pull them down. “M’honored you’d let me be your first, sweetheart,” he drawls, and I nearly scream at the insinuation. I’m not letting him do anything.
I start to put up more of a fight, useless against his thick arms holding me so tightly. Cool air touches my ass and the space between my thighs as he manages to shimmy my panties further down even in my struggle. I clamp my legs shut in defiance, roaring out a strained grunt as I keep trying to squirm out of his grasp. He huffs in anger, trying to subdue my writhing body before he pushes it towards the couch. I land hard, banging my knee on the hard edge that supports the cushion, wincing and trying to catch my breath. I’m practically in position for him already, ass pressed out towards him, on my hands and knees.
“Gonna make me do things the hard way, are you?” He scowls, his free hand fisting in my hair again, pulling me close. His breath is hot over my shoulder, the sensation vile against the skin of my cheek, stained with tears. “Been too long since I found a pretty virgin like you. An’ ruinin’ this perfect, pure little cunt is jus’ the cherry on top of a perfect day f’me.”
I feel his hard cock twitch against me, a reminder of what’s to come. The movements are quick for how bulky Joel’s body is, let alone his age, as he exchanges the hold across my chest for my wrists, bundling them behind my back. I cry out at the strain, the awkward angle he’d twisted them to, fighting him again until a hard smack lands on my ass. I scream through gritted teeth, not giving up the fight, but another thwap! rings out through the apartment, making me falter. My tender flesh screams at me in agony when he lands another spank, even harder this time, then another, until I’m crying unrelenting, fat tears.
With me rendered motionless, Joel presses down, bending me over, my balance tricky with my hands behind my back. My face nearly touches the couch, but I’m precariously held up by the wrists, the strain already making them ache. The warmth dripping between my thighs betrays me as my ass stings in residual little pulses, so raw and sore but spreading a pleasure through me that I’ve never known before.
I don’t have time to dwell on it before Joel is grasping one hand on my hip, notching himself at my entrance. “Promise you’re gonna like this, that you’ll never be able to think of anyone else’s cock but daddy Joel’s,” he spews gruffly in my ear before he thrusts hard, one swift motion to bury himself inside of me. I scream out, the searing pain between my thighs making me wonder if I’m being split open for good, if it’s possible that some things are just too big to fit in certain places of the body.
“Fuuuuuuck,” Joel hisses through his teeth, making the tiniest thrusting motions to ensure he’s buried deep. Every movement pierces me with a new sting as my body desperately tries to adjust, to accommodate the horrible, overwhelming intrusion. “You were not kiddin’, sweetheart. Tightest fuckin’ pussy I’ve ever been in.”
I sob, unable to speak, unable to move as Joel thrusts brutally from the get go, his hips snapping with force, crashing into mine hard enough to bruise. The lewd sounds we make disgust me, because I know I’m part of those sounds, my body enjoying the filthy things he’s saying, the way he’s taking me without remorse. He pulls himself out, clicking his tongue as he peers down between our bodies. “Christ, you are one sexy little bird. Poor little virgin bleedin’ on daddy’s cock.”
The thought horrifies me, making my stomach turn. “Please,” I cry out, my body rocking with the motions as he starts to fuck me again, the strain on my wrists as Joel uses them to help thrust himself inside of me starting to gnaw deeper into them. I’m like a ragdoll with the way he’s jerking me by my wrists, my body having no choice but to flail in time with the movements so that he can press himself deep on each cruel thrust inwards.
“You want more? You beggin’ already?” Joel grunts between his heavy breaths, sounding so cocky it makes me want to spin around and punch him. I settle for gritting my teeth instead, feeling my body slowly but surely melding into his. When Joel presses me down further, forcing an arch in my back, I whimper when his cock hits something sensitive, deep, primal. Fuck, is it something.
“Oh, that’s it. We got her now, don’t we?” he says from above, continuing to stroke his cock along that spot repeatedly. I feel myself losing my will to fight, hating the pleasure but feeling myself lean into it slightly, my hips pressing back to meet his nearly against my will. “You ever come before, sweetheart?” He leans in a little closer to ask the question, the pistoning of his hips slowing the slightest bit.
I refuse to answer, tears pooling in my eyes. I don’t want him to take this from me, I don’t want him to know anything about me. He jerks my wrists at the same time he slams his hips into me, and I whimper loudly, feeling the way he’s surely bruising my insides.
“If you ain’t figured it out yet, the rules are that you answer me when I’m askin’ you a question if you know what’s good for ya,” he spits out, and I shake my head, letting it hang limply.
“Use your words. Say ‘no, daddy’,” he says with sinister condescension, stroking his own ego.
“N-no… daddy…” I say, my tongue revolting against the words, bile climbing up my throat.
He moves his hand to my head, stroking carefully and softly. “Oh, that’s a shame. That’s a daaaamn shame. All pent up, y’are. But daddy will make it all better.” He sounds deranged, sick, like he truly believes that I’m thankful to him for what he’s doing to me. I can’t answer, my mouth gaping open just as he releases my wrists, letting me fall to the couch with a thud. My open mouth gets a mouthful of the cushions, making me sick over the fact that it’s probably full of god knows what due to its age and whatever things Joel seems to get up to in this apartment of his.
I blink as Joel grips tightly at my hips, wondering why he suddenly trusts my hands to be free, when it happens. He thrusts into that spot again, harsh and unforgiving, and I nearly see stars behind my eyes as the head of his cock punches against things I didn’t even know were there. That’s why. I’m incapacitated at this angle, brutally forced to enjoy the pleasure washing over my body as Joel takes from me, actually giving in return this time.
I bite my tongue hard, not wanting to give him any satisfaction for the tiny moans that are growing louder in my throat, desperate to be let out.
“Let me hear you, princess. Daddy doesn’t do with quiet girls. I can feel you clampin’ down on my cock, know you’re lovin’ how I use you up like you were meant for it.”
I shake my head in protest, but a strangled sound escapes past my tight lips when Joel slams into me harder than he has yet, puffing hard as he fucks me like a greedy animal. He chuckles through heavy breaths, little whispers of that’s it, come on, take it, flow freely from his nasty mouth.
I feel myself slip away, further gone from reality as the warmth spreads from my pelvis into my belly, coiling tight. Everything tingles, set on fire, the spot where Joel handles my hips with his fat fingers practically burning with a constant mix of pleasure and pain. I cry out when Joel’s cock pulls that feeling out from deep inside of me again, half a sob and half a moan as it crescendos, waves of pleasure crashing over me.
Joel’s grunts of approval, so brutish and debauched, sends a new wave of arousal through me. I tremble, eyes squeezed shut with my body completely out of my control, taken over by this boundless bliss. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever felt before: heavenly warmth worlds above any of the pleasures I’ve known. This had to be what Joel was referring to, urging me towards, telling me he wanted to make me come. This had to be what I was missing out on all these years, hiding myself away. Was this the reason sex was so coveted, so sought after? Was this feeling… the reason he’s doing what he is to me right now?
It feels like it’s never ending, my body so rigid as it spasms yet pliant as he fucks into me harder and harder. I loathe the noises I’m making that intermingle with his as I squeeze my eyes shut, enjoying it.
“Fuck, fuck - that’s it - f-fuck knew you’d love it. Come on my cock, baby, that’s right.” Joel’s string of praises reach my ears as I come down from my high, limp and yielding to whatever it is he wants to do to me now. I have no fight - my bones turned to jelly, my body sore all over, my throat scratchy from the way he’d assaulted it earlier. I only have it in me to give the rest of myself over, whether I like it or not.
“S-so fuckin’ tight, lettin’ me take your virginity like a good little whore,” he punches out, pounding into my sensitive cunt like it’s saving his soul, like it’s the only thing he could ever care about. I’m on the precipice of coming again, my nerves still frayed and on edge from the last one. A smaller but still powerful climax takes over, my body shuddering and tight, milking every last second of the pleasure.
“Gonna blow my load into this pure little pussy, make it mine - fuck - gonna fill you up like the cocksleeve you are. P-probably never want to be without my fuckin’ load drippin’ out of you again. I-I’m close, fuck -” Joel rambles as he ruts his hips deep, one final thrust and a grunt, and I feel him stall, pulsing into me.
It’s all suddenly very still, an eerie quiet settling over the room. My entire body burns hot, the only thing keeping me from collapsing is Joel’s hands still anchored on my hips as he leaves his cock inside of me, plugging me up. I want to cry again at the sudden, overwhelming shame I feel, but I can’t give him the satisfaction. I can’t.
Joel pats my ass a few times, pulling out. I tremble hard, falling forward onto the couch without his hold, instantly curling in on myself. I resent the way I’d noticed how empty I felt the second he was gone, how cold my body was without his warmth pressed into it. I dare to peer up at the sick man who stands above me, catching his breath, watching just as the last bit of his softening cock gets tucked back into his jeans. He swipes a hand across his forehead, gathering sweat, staring down at me with a darkened expression, grinning cockily.
When he plops down on the couch next to me, picking up the can of beans he’d been eating before, my mouth hangs open in surprise at how casual he’s acting. I watch his face shine with sweat, his breathing still labored, but everything else about his attitude would indicate he didn’t just force himself on me.
I try to keep my expression neutral for my own safety as I feel something leak out of me, not even wanting to give him the smug satisfaction of having to confirm my suspicions about what it is. I do my best to position my body so he can’t see between my legs as I try to pull my underwear up from where they sit near my knees, my jeans following. Joel only gives me a knowing glance as he takes a bite, conscious of the fact that a part of him sits inside my now soiled underwear, and a part of me now sits inside of his soul.
He shoves the can my way and I shrink back at his sudden motion, not taking it from him. “Eat. I ain’t havin’ you all weak and despondent for the next time.”
I feel my heart sink down past my ass, my stomach plummeting along with it as nausea overtakes me, a dizzying sensation clouding my vision. He couldn’t have said what I think he did. I - I’d paid my debt, whatever it was he thought I owed him for saving me when I didn’t even ask him to. For saving me and then doing exactly what that man had planned to do anyways under the guise of a caring, noble rescuer.
“N-next time…?” I manage to make my mouth move, my throat to produce a sound, pushing the question out in a voice that doesn’t sound like my own.
“Know you said not to call you stupid but my house, my rules, an’ sweetheart…” He looks at me under his raised, expectant brows. “My stupid, stupid girl. Did you really think that would be enough? That I’d get an opportunity every man dreams of - an untouched, perfect pussy like yours, to keep all for m’self, and throw it all away?” He’s creeping closer as he speaks, shrouding me on the couch with his huge frame, caging in where I lay, my body wound as tightly as it can to itself to block whatever he’s thinking of doing next. “Now you don’t think daddy is that dumb to let you go knowin’ all that, do you?”
I sit stunned silent underneath him, wide eyes fixed in a tortured gaze on his rugged face, but his hand squeezing my thigh is warning enough for me to shake my head, stuttering out an answer. “N-no. No…” I whisper.
Two approving pats on my cheek send Joel slinking back slightly, his dark, unhinged eyes staring holes into me as they roam over my body. Despite nothing even visible - my chest hidden underneath my arms and legs clamped tightly - I feel violated, objectified.
Terror rips through my chest as reality settles in slowly but surely. I look at the man I’d trusted once, who’d shown himself to be a friend, or at the least an ally, currently feasting his eyes on me like I’m a product. Which now, I suppose I am. A whore. His whore.
“Now,” he says, licking his lips, that hungry gaze already returning, a bulge appearing in his jeans and stretching the fabric. “All I’ve got to do is decide just how long I’ll keep ya for.”
dividers by @/saradika-graphics!
#fic: indebted#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#dark!joel miller fanfiction#dark!joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#joel miller x f!reader#x reader#the last of us fanfiction#tlou fanfiction#dddne joel miller#dead dove joel miller
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dark desires
Theodore Nott had been the perfect boyfriend, yet there’s a darkness within him that you longed to unravel, to explore. So this Halloween, you came up with a proposal: a spooky mask, a haunted house, and a night for dark desires. Be careful what you wish for.
dark!Theodore Nott x f!Reader
Warnings: 18+ mdni, characters are aged up, dom!Theo, consensual non-consent (cnc), roleplay, knife kink, mask kink, oral (m! and f!receiving), degradation, praise kink, daddy kink, fingering, mirror sex, piv, creampie
a/n: posting my first ever kinktober fic! thanks to my wifeyy @pizzaapeteer for proofreading, you're the best ♡
✿ Masterlist | ✿ Theodore Nott Masterlist | 4.4k words
Prologue
Theodore Nott is the ideal boyfriend. He celebrated your wins with you and encouraged you when you faced challenges. You received thoughtful gifts from him and your conversations always led you to new discoveries about the world. Being with him was an adventure just as much as it was home.
Yet the more you got to know him, the deeper your curiosity grew. Theo is a complicated person and it was clear there’s always more to him beneath his wild hair and ocean eyes. There was especially a darkness in him that drew you in. A shadow he hid from the world and you wanted to be that one person he could share it with. The one he confided in, explored it with. After all, it was the same darkness you saw in yourself. And so, you came up with a proposal.
One night of unrestrained exploration, a safe place for your dark desires.
“I want to know all of you. I’m not afraid of your dark,” you said, ending your proposal.
Theo hesitated, “you should be afraid.” Yet there was an unmistakable glint in his eye, a wilderness that rattled against the cage of his stoic restraint. Desperate and ready to be let out.
“That’s for me to decide,” you argued, searching his eyes. Asking him to trust you. “I want to know who you are when no one's watching. I want you to show me all the sinful acts you'd do to me knowing I'd take it all and enjoy every last touch,” you elaborated, sliding a finger down his chest.
Theo closed his eyes and sighed, his composure waning at your words. “Fuck, how did I get so lucky?” Seeming to gather himself, he hesitated. “But I don’t want to hurt you.”
“It's okay, I promise. I want to free us from the restraints of polite society. Just you and me, Theo, let’s carve our own world together.”
His eyes softened, you were already his entire world. “Do you trust me?” he asked, gently caressing your hair as you laid in the crook between his shoulders and neck.
“Always.”
“That’s my girl,” Theo leaned in to plant a kiss on your forehead, sending tingles down your spine.
You basked in his praise and continued, “how would you feel about roleplaying a stranger in a mask? I promise we’ll discuss the details, set rules, and establish a safe word.”
He smirked, “I think we’re going to have so much fun.”
A faint glow led you deeper into the hallway. Around you, cobwebs were strewn across cracked tombstones, the names far too smeared to read. Your heart slammed against your ribcage as your hands shook. Another scream pierced the air from a distance. Your only companion was the weight that settled in your stomach the second you stepped into the haunted house.
Fog hissed in the corners. Wisps of smoke snaked from the ends of the room, creeping towards the centre. The cool air snatched your legs like the greedy outstretched arms of a zombie. A coffin laid in the corner with its lid missing, its sinister insides inviting you to settle in and rest your weary bones. You shook the thought away and walked as fast as you could, reminding yourself to breathe.
You were so close to the next room. So close to the end of all this horror.
And then you screamed. A figure growled beside you, where had he even come from? A mummy reached out, its skull tainted bronze with time. You ran through the rest of the hallway, laughing in relief when you reached an empty corner. A break from all the chaos. The next room was serial killer themed, adorned with blood-soaked bodies hanging limply from the ceiling. You took another moment to catch your breath and let another group of visitors pass you.
Closing your fist, you steeled yourself. Just as you lifted your leg to walk, a strong arm grabbed your waist and pulled you into the shadows. Your arms were pinned down your sides, trapped. The breath rushed from your lungs as you collided with a muscular body, your back pressed to him. His free hand tugged at your hair so that you were looking up at him. All you saw was hollowed out eyes and a gaping mouth. He was wearing a mask.
“Well well, who do we have here?” he said in a low tone, his gravelly voice followed by a malicious chuckle.
Your chest heaved as you tried to take lungfuls of breaths only to come up empty. Panic swam through your mind, thoughts plunging deep into the ocean of your subconscious. Out of reach.
“Want to play with me, amore?” He continued, releasing your hair so he could caress the side of your face. A gesture far too intimate for a stranger to make. His other hand kept your hips firmly in place. You tried to squirm, to move out of his grasp, but he was much stronger than you were.
His words sent a chill down your spine. Something was wrong. Were scare actors allowed to grab you? You could have sworn you signed a waiver that mentioned it was prohibited.
“L-let me go,” you squeaked, trying to find your voice.
“Play with me and then I’ll let you go,” he said, dragging out the words slowly, “I promise we’ll have so much fun.”
You tried harder to escape, arms and hips thrashing against his solid grasp. You screamed for help, certain someone would come rushing. The masked man simply laughed, unfazed by your efforts.
“I do like it when my prey struggle. Scream all you want, no one’s coming for you. It all just blends in with the others,” he said arrogantly as he tightened his hold on you to cease your movements. You froze when you felt his erection against you. Heat bloomed in the pit of your stomach and you tried to tamp it down. He was big and you wondered just how well he would fit inside you. “Careful now cara,” he teased, “or you’ll have to take responsibility for your actions.”
You shook your head to say no, to shake off the twisted desires that had taken you captive. In a last ditch effort, you stomped your foot down his shoe. He hissed in pain, cursing in a language you didn’t understand. His hold on you momentarily waned but not long enough for you to break free, just long enough for him to get angry.
“You want to play hard to get?” he said, his voice growing cold. “Fine, I’ll be the bad guy,” he said as he pressed something cold and metallic on your neck. You instinctively moved your head away. Wrong move. It gave him more access to your throat.
“You wouldn’t want to find out just how sharp this is now don’t you?” he asked, the playful tone back in his voice. He had you right where he wanted you. In the haze of adrenaline and terror, an ache grew in between your legs and you squeezed them together, trying to find relief. “I’ll be good,” you said, fear and lust rushing through your veins.
“Show me,” he replied, commanding you as he kept his knife steady against your throat while his other hand released your waist. He wasted no time feeling you up under your dress, his hand caressing your soft thighs. Your knees felt weak from his touch, but you reminded yourself to stay still so your throat stays unharmed.
As he moved his fingers to your inner thigh, you moved your legs apart for him. You tried to convince yourself it was only to keep you safe. You definitely were not thinking about how good his fingers would feel on your soaking cunt. You took in a sharp inhale when you felt him tease you through your underwear.
You couldn’t help the way your hips bucked, wanting to feel more pressure from his fingers. He chuckled and shame mingled with the heat of your desire. “I knew you wanted it,” he said with a smile in his voice. You kept quiet because there was no denying it now.
Encouraged by your eagerness, he ripped down your underwear, exposing your dripping wet cunt. He slid his fingers across your folds, covering them in your slick. He spread it out to feel every inch of your aching core. It may have been cold in the haunted house from his blade to all the fog and fear, but right now, your entire body was on fire. “Fuck, you’re so drenched for me, amore. I bet I could easily stick two fingers inside you.”
You whimpered at his words, stunned that someone could be so bold and direct. You were not sure you could leave now, even if you tried. You needed to know how his fingers felt. He didn’t leave you wondering for long.
You found yourself moaning when your pussy suddenly felt full, his fingers working their way in. He curled his fingers, hitting your g spot. For the first time that evening, you screamed in pleasure. Your voice blended together with the other screams. Your knees gave out and you laid your head back on his shoulder, away from the knife. His body kept you upright as he continued curling his fingers then sliding them in and out, until he found a steady rhythm.
Sloppy, squelching sounds filled the air and it took you a moment to realize it was you. Satisfied you would stay and play with him, Theo lowered his knife so he could focus on your needy cunt.
You suddenly felt empty when you realized he moved his fingers towards your face. You opened your lips instinctively as he shoved his fingers into your mouth, your tongue lapping up your juices. He slid them in and out just as he had with your cunt, then shoved it down your throat, choking you in the process.
While you sucked on his fingers, you felt something hard rub against your clit and your eyes widened. It was the knife handle. “Be a good girl and take this for me,” he said as he moved it across your wet folds, gathering up your slick. “Grind against it, show me what you’ll do to my cock,” you closed your eyes while sucking his fingers and let your lust takeover.
It felt new and exciting to have the knife handle against you. It didn’t take you long to find the exact spots that shot euphoria through your veins and you rubbed yourself against it again and again. Pleasure built up in the base of your stomach. “I’m going to plunge the handle into you now,” he warned, “move carefully, wouldn’t want to see your pretty legs cut up now, don’t you?”
You shook your head to say no, too lost in the ecstasy to find your words. Your walls clutched the knife as it entered you effortlessly, you were already so stimulated, you could almost taste your sweet release. “Look at you, dripping all over this knife. You're a slut aren't you?” You moaned your agreement around his fingers.
Your senses were heightened as you concentrated on keeping your legs steady. He moved the knife back out only to enter the handle back inside you as he once again found a steady rhythm. You shifted forward, bracing yourself for your release. Theo noticed the sudden shift and he removed the knife, exchanging it once again with his fingers. He moved faster this time, chasing your release.
“You're gonna come all over my fingers and thank me, understood?” He said and all you could do was nod. “Show me just how much of a slut you are. Look at you, getting yourself taken by a stranger in a haunted house and fucked with a knife. What a perfect cockwhore.”
His words unraveled you and you surrendered to the pleasure. Ecstasy erupted through you in waves. Your walls fluttered against his fingers as he coaxed your release, curling his fingers to prolong the climax.
You panted against him as you felt your juices drip down your legs. “What do good girls say?” He asked and he slipped out his hand.
“T-thank you,” you managed, your voice hoarse from where he fucked your throat earlier.
“Thank you what?” he asked, slapping your cunt. You shivered against his touch, unintentionally grinding on his boner. It earned you a grunt, sending a jolt through your body, a new shade of desire illuminated within you. You enjoyed how he responded to you.
“Thank you daddy,” you replied, more steady this time.
“Good girl,” he said, praising you as he took a hold of your hand and pressed the knife into your back. Fear shot through you and you held your breath. “Step out of your underwear, bend over and pick it up like a good obedient slut.” You bent forward and followed his instructions, legs weak from your orgasm. “Put it in my pocket,” he commanded, “that’s it. This is mine now, a souvenir from an eager slut.”
“Come with me now, we’re just getting started,” he led you deeper into the darkness until a blinding light assaulted your eyes.
He had opened a secret backdoor. No doubt for scare actors to go around without being noticed, this was why they seemed to appear from nowhere. As your eyes adjusted, you got your first look at him. Not that there was much to see with his mask still on. All you noticed was the veins running through his muscled arm, black ink forming a pattern that disappeared up his shirt sleeve, but it was enough to stir your sinful thoughts.
“Don’t even think about screaming for help or running away,” he threatened as you moved side by side. Not that you were planning to anyway. To any onlooker, you just seemed like any other couple taking a stroll. The cool air brushed your sensitive bare cunt as you walked, sending gooseflesh rippiling through your skin.
“Where are you taking me?”
“You’ll find out soon enough,” was all he said as he opened the door and you exited the haunted house. Of course, you should have known. There was a hotel just right across and it seemed he already had a room booked as he led you straight to the elevator. He blended right in with his mask, as others passed by dressed as fairies, pirates and other assortments of costumes. Ready to party the night away.
Theo had another party in mind. Your mind raced as elevator buttons lit up, taking you closer and closer to the last place you needed to be. But you wanted it. You remembered how big he was, the way he reacted to you, how good it felt when he called you a good girl. He also called you a slut and for him, you would be one. You were dizzy with delight. Besides, what other choice did you have? You thought about the sharpness of his blade and felt yourself clench. It shouldn’t have been exciting, oh but it was.
You stepped out the elevator and once again, a weight settled in the pit of your stomach in anticipation of all the things he would do to you. He still held your arm while he led you to the room, his grip gentler now that he knew you would stay. It was almost romantic.
He swiped the hotel card and gestured for you to enter. As you moved past him, all you could focus on was the king sized bed in the centre of the room. The sheets pure and pristine reflected the soft glow of the light, a blank slate for you to paint all your sins on. Behind you, the lock clicked into place and Theo secured the double lock. The sound was impossibly soft and innocent for something that reverberated deep in your bones. There was no turning back now.
“On your knees,” he commanded. Your breath shuddered and you hesitated. “I said,” Theo repeated impatiently, “on your knees” he gripped your hair for emphasis. The sudden force knocked you out of balance and before you knew it, soft carpet kissed your knees as you fell with a thud. He started unbuckling his jeans, an unmistakable bulge carved right in front of you.
Your mouth salivated as he freed himself. “Look at me,” he said, shifting your attention back to his face. “Open your mouth wide and put your tongue out. Good girl.” He spat in your mouth and used his thumb to spread it around your tongue.
“You’re going to take me real good,” he said as he guided his hungry cock into your mouth. Liquid heat pooled in your core again because he tasted good. His eyes fluttered shut when he felt just how warm and wet you were. You moved your tongue around him while he thrust himself into you.
“That's it. Look at me while I fuck your pretty mouth,” he encouraged you, pressing himself deeper until you felt him down your throat. He continued pistoning his hips, movements growing rougher by the second. Your eyes watered with the effort as you continued to suck and swallow. He swiped your tears away with his thumb and got impossibly harder. He liked watching you cry for him. Around you, obscene sloppy sounds filled the room.
“You're taking me so well.” Theo complimented in between grunts, his other hand still gripping your hair to keep you in place. “So perfect for me,” he praised you, words punctuated with his frantic thrusts. “You look so beautiful with my cock shoved down your throat. Just like that.”
You hummed in delight, eager to please him. Your tears and his thumb had long smeared your makeup yet he still called you beautiful. “Be a good girl and swallow daddy’s cum,” he said, signaling his near release. You braced yourself until you felt his warm salty taste in your mouth.
“That's right, principessa, you better not spill. Take it all, right down your throat.” You complied, enjoying the way he thrust slowly as if scooping the rest of his cum from your mouth down your throat.
Satisfied, he removed himself, “breathe amore, you did so well for me. Get up now it's time to give you a reward, you've earned it.” You stood on shaky legs, your knees blushing red from the carpet. Theo held you up and led you towards the bed.
“Just lie there, let me taste your eager cunt,” he said, lifting your dress up and over your head. Your thighs glistened from your arousal and Theo chuckled. “Fuck, only a slut gets wet from sucking cock. What a pretty little cockwhore for daddy.” You whimpered at his words and felt yourself clench in response. The mattress felt soft and supportive beneath your tense body, ready to cradle your fall.
“Tell me you want my tongue all over your pretty pussy,” Theo commanded.
“I-” you looked away, suddenly shy until he reached forward to grab your chin, making you face him. You looked at the black and white mask and bit your bottom lip. One final resistance before giving voice to your desire. “I want to feel you eat me, daddy.”
“Now, see how easy that was.” He released your chin as he moved back to position himself between your legs. He moved the mask up just enough to use his mouth before snaking his arm around your legs, keeping them spread out for him.
You sucked in a breath the second you felt his tongue on your aching cunt. He was so eager, lapping up your juices and kissing your clit all the way down to your folds. The way his tongue moved spelled pure need as he tensed it enough to penetrate you. A blinding haze swept through you, your core still sensitive from the echoes of your earlier orgasm.
Sinful moans escaped your mouth, joining the chorus of Theo’s kisses on your slippery cunt. Sheets gripped between your fingers, lust took over your body and you found yourself grinding against him and his mask, enjoying the delicious friction.
“That’s right, show me how much of a slut you are,” Theo encouraged, swirling his tongue around your clit. It didn’t take long until your stomach clenched again, you could almost taste your next release. Your breaths grew shorter and you could see the stars–
“On no, not yet, amore,” Theo chuckled, releasing you and sliding his mask back on. “Fuck, my mask smells like your cunt. I get to bring another souvenir with me,” he groaned in appreciation. “The next time you cum will be around my cock.”
You closed your legs, trying to find pressure to ease the need growing hot and desperate. “Please,” you whispered, begging for more.
“What’s that?”
“P-please,” you said, louder this time. “Let me cum on your cock, daddy.”
“Good girl, you’re a quick learner aren’t you? Come here,” he said, guiding you up. “Get on all fours and crawl to me,” he teased and he moved towards the edge of the bed. You followed him, lost in his spell. Your eyes widened when you spotted a floor to ceiling mirror in the corner where he stood. You had been too wrapped up in watching him to notice it earlier.
“Look at yourself, that pretty face and that perfect body,” he groaned. “Everything about you so fuckable.” You watched yourself in the mirror and noticed your smeared mascara, your hair crumpled right where he took you earlier, eyes and lips puffy from where he fucked your mouth. You were nothing like the prim and proper girl you often were and it felt liberating to not have to be perfect. Instead, you were on all fours, ready to be used like a whore by the man in the mask.
You felt him press himself against you in bed. When did he get there? You admired his naked body in the mirror, sweat glistening while they dripped down and traced his muscled figure. But his mask, only the mask, stayed on. The one he said smelled just like your cunt.
“Now you’re going to show me just how much you want to cum,” he said, positioning himself near your entrance. “I’m going to fill you up real good, but you’ll have to move yourself back. Fuck yourself on my cock, amore.” You clenched around him, rewarding his efforts with a pornographic moan.
Your soaked cunt welcomed him effortlessly and soon you slid yourself back just as he commanded, moving until his cock kissed your cervix. The slapping motion of skin on skin filled the air with lewd noises along with the smell of sex. Theo joined in with his grunts as he grabbed onto your hips, encouraging you to keep going.
You gripped the sheets, trying to find purchase. Pleasure swelled within you again from the way your nipples rubbed against the bedsheets, creating a delicious friction, to the heat that reignited deep in your core. Your entire body was on fire.
“That’s it, need to feel you cum on my cock,” Theo encouraged, reaching down to grab your breast, pinching and rolling your nipple between his fingers. It was enough to send you over the edge, seeing stars again as your walls fluttered around his hard length. Theo took over, rutting his hips into you to prolong your orgasm until you returned to him.
“Thank you daddy,” you rasped when you finally found your voice in between your labored breaths. “It’s my pleasure, principessa, but I’m not yet done with you,” he said darkly, continuing his pace. “Look at yourself in the mirror,” he said, grabbing your hair once again to guide your head.
“Look at that cockwhore getting fucked. Watch your tits sway like the filthy slut that you are,” you moaned at his words, heat building deep inside you again. It was overstimulating, the way his balls tapped into you as he rocked his full length inside you. Watching yourself get used and seeing the wild look in your eyes, a mix of delight and desperation.
His deep, guttural voice echoed through you, pulling at your strings. Your arms gave out, weighed down by the intensity of it all, and before you could move, Theo took this opportunity to pin you down, his toned body covering yours.
You felt helpless and succumbed to him, no longer bound by fear. His mask hovered near your face as he continued his relentless pace inside you. “You like being used, huh?” He asked, looking at your connected figures in the mirror. “Yes,” you cried out, “I need to feel your cum inside me, daddy.”
“Fuck, that’s a good slut, you’re taking me so well” he grunted, slapping your ass just before he increased his pace. It was brutal and you were screaming again, drunk from the cocktail of pain and pleasure. Italian expletives rained from his lips as he chased his high. You watched the way his muscles flexed from the effort.
The familiar heat raged within you, walls tightening around Theo’s hard cock. Echoes of your bliss reached a crescendo and you found yourself spasming against him again. “Take it all, amore,” Theo’s filthy moans joined yours as your release triggered his, you felt his liquid heat coating your insides as he rode you through your orgasm.
He collapsed into you, bringing you to his arms. “That’s my girl,” he praised, “I’m so proud of you. You did so well.” You smiled and leaned into him, removing his mask to see him smiling back at you. He pressed a gentle kiss on your lips as if he hasn’t just fucked you raw. You laughed at the whiplash.
Your laughter washed over him, it really had been okay for him to unapologetically tap into his darkness in a way that feels euphoric and safe. It was liberating. His thumb traced your jaw, eyes searching yours. “Are you okay? Did I hurt you?”
You shook your head, “nothing I couldn’t handle. I promise.”
“You’ll tell me if I hurt you, right?” he pressed.
Your eyes softened at his concern. “Yes, you made me feel good, Theo. You exceeded all my expectations. I love getting to know this side of you.”
You were already the best part of him, the sun that held all the light in Theo’s universe. He had no idea until tonight that his darkness could find a home in you too. It's the kind of dark that made the stars shine brighter. How had he gotten so lucky with you?
He planted a kiss on your forehead, bringing you closer to him. “I love sharing this with you. Now let me draw a bath and call room service for dinner. I’ll take good care of you, principessa.”
You called out to him as you watched him get up, “hey, Theo?”
“Yeah?” He turned back.
“Happy Halloween,” you said, grinning.
“Happy Halloween, amore.”
✿ Masterlist | ✿ Theodore Nott Masterlist
a/n: I very rarely write smut, but when I do, the next one always seems darker than the previous one. Happy kinktober!
#kinktober#theodore nott smut#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott fanfiction#theodore nott fic#theodore nott#amongemeraldcloudswrites#amongemeraldclouds smut
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I’m so obsessed with Perv!Dick as if I wouldn’t end up incredibly depressed in that scenario, butttttt
Dick bringing Roy over to have fun with you, telling you that Tim is into threesomes and you shouldn’t worry now because Roy isn’t nearly as intense as Kon (Tim’s threesome partner of choice) while he’s backing you up until your back hits Roy’s chest, caging you between the two men? Is this something?
IT’S SOMETHING! Anon, this ask shut off my brain for like 8 hours straight and then a bunch of other times intermittently whenever I thought about it. Oh to be sandwiched between Dick and Roy, I would die happy. Here is the most cohesive response I would muster with the stray pieces of thoughts I could pluck from rattling around my brain. Good work anon 💖 Warnings: Perv!Dick, F/M/M, coercion, manipulation, Dick being possessive ━ [Part 1] ━ [Part 2] ━ [Part 4]
Dick knows he’s pushing his luck; his heart feels heavy with guilt as he watches you pick at the beds of your nails.
“I don’t know, Dick.” You’ve had this look on your face, like a kicked puppy, all big wet eyes and pouty lips since you’d opened the door to find not one, but two pairs of eyes staring back at you. He feels bad, but more than that he wants to fuck the pitiful expression right off your face. “I’ve been thinking maybe I should save some firsts for Tim.”
“I get that, you’re right.” Dick agrees purely for the sake of giving you some perceived agency back, ignoring the way Roy crosses his arms and quirks a brow from behind you. That’s another part of it, proving to Roy that he really does have you wrapped around his finger after bragging about you incessantly. “If you would rather your first threesome be with Tim and Kon, I totally understand.”
“K-Kon?” You stutter, eyes growing even bigger at the sound of his name.
Dick knows you’ve met Kon exactly once before at a birthday gathering for Tim and that it hadn’t been the best experience for you. Kon rarely has bad intentions, he’s just a little rough around the edges. You’d incidentally gotten in his way on the dance floor at some point, and it had resulted in some pretty nasty, but entirely accidental bruising and Kon hadn't really been given the chance to apologise, which he absolutely would have, if Dick hadn't swept you off the dance floor so he could 'tend' to you before Tim or Kon could get a look in.
“Oh, that's right, those two are tight.” Roy clues in on the play and you swing around to watch as he goes on. “Good guy, bit much though. Doesn’t know his own strength. I once watched hi- Ah, you… don’t wanna hear this, hon.”
“No…” You’re looking at Roy with that same innocently curious look you’d given Dick the first time he’s sunk his fingers into your tight little pussy. Roy’s chest immediately starts to puff up, his freckled skin turning reddish with arousal as he throws Dick a glance that says ‘wow!’. “I think I do.”
“Really you don’t.” Dick tells you and you turn to face him again, stepping back when you realise how close he’d gotten while your back was turned. You raise your hands unconsciously and Dick takes them in his own, tenderly pressing your palms to his chest, to his heart, really amping up the soft, understanding 'brother-in-law' angle as he goes on. “If you want to wait for Tim and Kon to tag team you, that’s totally your prerogative, but the offer is on the table.”
You’ve also only met Roy once more before tonight. He had this easy sort of confidence with the ladies. Before Dick has purposely interrupted, selfishly wanting you all to himself, Roy had offered you a charmingly mellow smile that has intrigued you. Before he'd even introduced himself, he had a hand on the small of your back, strong fingers massaging your skin in much the same way he does now.
You hadn't even noticed how Dick had been herding you toward your guest until your back was pressed against Roy’s solid chest. Roy’s hands tread ever so carefully around your hips, creeping under your shirt, the tips of his fingers are hard and warm against your skin. He leans into your shoulder until his stubble scratches at your neck and his voice reverberates down your spine as he talks directly into your ear. “We can be real gentle with you.”
They won’t be gentle. They’ll start off slow and calm. Roy kissing your neck, stroking your hair, whispering sweet words to you while Dick warms you up. Getting you off and stretching you out on his fingers, just like he’s done countless times before. He’s got your pretty pussy memorised and he’s gonna make sure you’re wet and ready to take them both.
But once your lips are around Roy’s cock and Dick is balls deep inside you, all bets are off.
"Fuck- You suck it like a pro, doll."
"Who taught you that, baby?"
Even if your mouth weren't to full, you're to cock drunk to interject when they converse about how good your pussy feels, or how well you take it while they pile into you from both ends.
You're nervous about loosing your anal virginity, but between that and taking them both in your cunt, you'd much rather let Dick put it in your ass, and he coos in your ear the whole time about how you're such a good girl, you're doing such a good job, making them both feel so good.
But when Roy applauds how tight your pussy is when he starts stretching it out in places Dick's cock couldn't reach; Dick tells him to pull your hair, cause he knows how it makes your walls clench and your eyes roll back.
It's overwhelming, four big strong hands groping and caressing you incessantly. The sick, wet sound of skin slapping echos through the room. The scent of sex and musk fills your nose. You can't look away from them both at the same time, and whenever you close your eyes Dick pries them open again or slaps your buttcheeks until you get the point. He can't stand not getting the full picture, he loves how expressive your eyes are.
When it's over Roy gives you his number. "In case you ever wanna trade Tim in for 'an upgrade'."
Dick smacks him across the back of the head.
#roys cock is bigger than dicks you can't change my mind#anon#gilverrrambles#perv!dick#thanks for the ask!#dick grayson/reader#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson#nightwing#nightwing x reader#nightwing/reader#roy harper/reader#roy harper x reader#roy harper#arsenal x reader#arsenal#arsenal/reader#nsft#tw dubcon#f reader#reader insert
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AGORA HILLS
Daniel Ricciardo x rapper!Reader SMAU
Warnings : SUGGESTIVE content!! Reader and Daniel being horny for eachother on main
face claim : megan thee stallion
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danielricciardo : Locked in. It’s race week
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user7 : praying for a dr3 podium
— user5 : lmao you’ll need something stronger than prayer
user6 : can’t believe mother is dating this loser
youruser : whore
— user9 : 😅😨
youruser : I’m sorry I wasn’t aware I was running a brothel
youruser : who let you out of your cage long enough for you to post this
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youruser : who you trying to impress???? 😨😅
— danielricciardo : I’m sorry bookie, what can I do to make it up to you?
— youruser : you know what 😼🤭
— danielricciardo : on my way!
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youruser : THANK UUU SO MUCH LONDON! Always a pleasure performing for you, truly one of the best crowds! Now if you’ll excuse me my man is waiting for me in our hotel room with nothing but edible underwear on 🤤
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lewishamilton : an amazing show as always y/n! But was that last part really necessary?
— youruser : yes
user7 : your free speech… hand it over!!!
user21 : how she’s so down bad over a man well past his prime i can’t understand 🤷🏼♀️
— youruser : PAST HIS PRIME!???log off NEOWWW
— user32 : I fear she’s dickmatised 😔
user45 : love that they’re still in the honeymoon phase
— user47 : FR!! I need all their secrets! after almost 3 years and they’re still so in love with each other
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danielricciardo : woof woof bark bark
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danielricciardo : I ate the underwear 3 songs ago
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youruser : I see your “Danny Ric is a loser who doesn’t deserve y/n” and raise you “LOOK AT HIM, LOOK AT MY MAN, LOOK AT HIS BIG GORGEOUS, RIDEABLE NOSE, AND HIS TATTED THIGHS AND HIM IN A SUIT!!! RATTLING ON THE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE!! I NEED HIM I NEED HIM I NEED HIM, GOD FORGIVE ME FOR EVERYTHING IM GOING TO DO TO THIS MAN WHEN I GET HOME FROM THIS DINNER, THE SLOPPIEST TOP THATS EVER GUNNA SLOP IS COMING HIS WAY!” oh btw Agora Hills out like rn! view all comments
maxverstappen1 : oh… uhm okay. NURSE SHES OUT AGAIN
— youruser : don’t be jealous cause I’m doing your man on the daily
— maxverstappen1 : 😨
— user65 : lmao y/n stays traumatising these drivers
landonorris : listened to the song! Great! Cool! Cool cool cool. Didn’t need to know all that but really good I guess
user70 : you know I’m starting to see the vision
lewishamilton : y/n… is this why youre on the phone rn?
— youruser : sorry wrong number
— lewishamilton : this is social media
— youruser : no habla ingles!!
user1 : not the random picture of you on the second slide
— user3 : that’s what I’m saying 😭 like is this not an appreciation post for your man?
— youruser : god forbid a woman look hot and post it! need to show you guys he’s taken by a bad bitch!
danielricciardo : forever grateful you chose me to spend life with 💞
— youruser : oh… we not being horny rn?
— danielricciardo : my draws are off rn
— lewishamilton : OH this is why y/n just sprinted out of the room
— youruser : forever grateful you chose to spend life with me too 💙💙
— user47 : she sends him blue hearts??!????? Is it for visa cashapp paypal venmo el matador racing bulls
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youruser : my man
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#f1 smau#formula 1 smau#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#formula one smau#daniel riccardo x reader#daniel ricciardo x female reader#daniel ricciardo x you#Daniel Ricciardo x black reader#daniel ricciardo fanfic#Daniel Ricciardo smau
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Hi girl I had a really bad couple of days, yesterday was my birthday and it went horrible and today i got yelled at because I had a panic attack and wanted to leave the gym early and my parents said I was wasting their time...
Could you do a panic attack comfort fic with Johnny and/or Simon? But not like during the panic attack, maybe reader tells them about it later and just isn't doing so good. I love your work 🩷
Thank you my love. I’m so sorry this is very late and I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. Panic attacks are incredibly difficult to both go through during the moment and after. I hope you’re alright, message me whenever.
I hope this is kinda what u were after. Happy belated birthday, darling. :)
CW: This can be read as both platonic or romantic, completely up to you. Allusions to panic attacks/ poor mental health(?)
You could feel it before it began, the coil of tightness that winded in your chest, skidding along your bones, agitating your lungs as they constricted, refraining from oxygen.
You could feel it after, too.
It was difficult, always hitting when you least expected, your mind chanting that you were okay, just quiet enough to not be heard by the rest of you. You sat there, thighs tapping together as your feet rocked, heart settling into a monotone thump against your rib cage.
It was loud, overly loud. Maybe your ears were just more sensitive. It was a chorus of voices colliding against chipped walls and dusty ceilings, fans whirling like ticking clocks as plates clattered on worn tables. It was too loud.
“Are yae listening?” Soap quipped, a sheepish smile on his face as your gaze faltered, watching him for a moment before excusing yourself. Your name fell on deaf ears as you walked off, huddled inside your room. The barracks were quieter than the food hall, the occasional rattle of feet passing by your door.
You clutched a folded book in between sweated palms, the pages whirling into one as words seized before you, pupils dilating with exhaustion as you huffed a breath. The knock on your door was nearly silent, a loud pause shattering against the door frame as you sighed.
“Hi Johnny,” your voice was quiet.
His hand was rubbing at the back of his neck, a subtle look of confusion upon his features, “Y’ alright, lass? Walked off back there with nae warning.”
Your brows furrowed, rubbing against your lashes in an irritated manner as you opened your mouth like a guppy, quickly closing it as your own vision met an icy arctic. “I- It’s nothing.”
Soap’s push was gentle as he guided himself into your private quarters, shutting the door with a gentle click. “What is it, bon?”
Your thighs sunk into the comforter as you adjusted yourself onto the pillows resting at your headboard. They felt featherless, an empty bag of cotton that guaranteed no support. “I just haven’t been doing the best, but I’m fine, really, just not a good day-“
“Yae can’t be doing the best and be fine, can yae?” Johnny’s voice was overworked, normally a higher tone of banter that had now subsided into a tone of pure comfort and concern. Your eyes became overwashed with salted moisture, a steady shake of a breath gripping at your oesophagus as you flickered your pupils down to your fingers, the same fingers that were finding comfort in coiling around one another.
“It just gets difficult sometimes, Johnny. I – I don’t know how to explain it. It hits me, and it just feels like it will never go away like I’ll be stuck in this deep hole forever. It’s like being sucked into a rip and the only way out is to drown.”
The Scotsman was quiet, which was unusual. He wasn’t the best with comfort, normally using humour to counteract his own personal issues. “Lass, I’m sorry-“
“I promise it’s fine, Johnny.”
His hand was gentle over yours, a grip that broiled your skin into a thin sheet of worn paper, written with scribes that he understood you, that he cared for you. Your eyes met, subsided tears washing over you with a gentle glaze as his lip quirked, lifting slightly into a smile.
“It dan’t always have tae be fine, yae know that, right?”
“Yea-“
“I dan’t think yae do. Y’er allowed tae feel… scared. Or, unsure. Feeling certain ways dan’t make yae weak, lass.”
Your arms were cold as they wrapped around his larger frame, immediate heat engulfing you as you adjusted your frame, steady hands slinking into the tension of your skin as you breathed into the crook of his neck. His skin was tainted with thick aftershave, hues of mint burning through your senses as it tickled your nose hairs.
The scruff from Soap’s shaven face rubbed against the flesh of your cheeks as you pressed against one another. His lips were thin yet silken, engraving a stain into the structure of your forehead as you breathed out a shallow thank you.
You weren’t sure how long you both sat there, wrapped up in each other in a swell embrace, hearts combining into one beat as your hair mangled into the gel of his mohawk. Your eyes fluttered shut, consumed by exhaustion as a final mark from the Sergeant laced your skin before he left, allowing you to sleep.
You woke alone, a scribbled note next to you along with a jumper. The heart was messy, written on an old napkin, the words ‘Our bravest soldier’ mangled into the thin paper. You smiled, grabbing the jumper as you slid it onto your frame.
The room was quiet as you sat there, picking up the book again, a lighter feeling in your chest. There was a knock on your door again, a loud one that you could tell was attempting to be quiet.
His eyes were humble, a sunken carob that spoke without a voice. Whilst concealed by his usual mask, his face seemed bare, vulnerable. Ghost, unlike Soap, wasn’t one of many words. He stood there, tall and structured.
“C’mere.”
His scent was reminiscent of whiskey and gunpowder. Simon was cold to the touch, gradually melting into you as his head rested on yours, the prickle of his kiss planted amid your hair.
The Lieutenant knew of pain; he had grown around it, blooming from violence and the anarchy of death. He also knew words weren’t his thing. He did know, however, that he hadn’t moved for the past hour, your sleeping frame curled into burly arms as he watched your lashes dip into your cheeks, a monotone strum sounding from his chest as he rocked you into a state of comfort.
#evilgwrl#call of duty x reader#simon riley#141 x reader#ghost x reader#ghost#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#soap#soap x reader#ghoap x reader#soap call of duty#soap cod#john soap mactavish#john mactavish#soap mactavish#call of duty#cod#cod modern warfare
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Scream..18+ (Winner)
*Pic from Pinterest*
Summary: Noah has been obsessed you with you from the minute he met you. So he decided to do something about it.
Warning: B&E, chasing, slight dubcon at first(DO NOT READ IF THAT TRIGGERS YOU), turns to full consent, smut, piv, unprotected sex, oral (F&M receiving), choking, dirty talk.
A/N: 13 cameras will be posted next because I already have half of it written!! Anyways plz enjoy 😉
The wind howled outside, rattling the old shutters of my home like a ghostly chorus. It was Halloween night, and while the neighborhood was alive with laughter and the sounds of trick-or-treaters, I found myself alone, comfortable in my solitude. As I settled onto the couch, the flickering light from my favorite horror movie cast eerie shadows on the walls. The protagonist's scream echoed in the back of my mind, but tonight, I felt safe, cocooned by the familiarity of my home.
Then, the phone rang.
I hesitated. Who is calling me this late?, glancing at the caller ID. No one. Just an unknown number. Curiosity pulled me in. "Hello?" I answered tentatively.
A low, distorted voice crackled through the line. "What’s your favorite scary movie?"
I huffed a quiet laugh, at the obvious prank call “Um, it’s probably ‘The Shining,’” I chuckled, deciding to entertain the mysterious caller. “What’s yours?” He chuckles darkly before answering.
“Nice choice. I bet you'd look pretty in the shower, just like Lia Beldam…I guess I’d say Halloween " he replies, the raspy tone sending a chill down my spine. I felt a strange mix of excitement and unease. "Who is this? This is getting a little creepy." After a few moments of silence, he finally spoke.
"Just Someone who's been watching you. And tonight, I couldn't resist calling to hear your voice." A sense of dread settled in my stomach. My heart raced as I tried to picture who this mysterious caller could be.
“I’m hanging up, you’re starting to freak me out.” I breathed, my hands started to shake uncontrollably. "Don't hang up." I froze as his voice turned hard, almost threatening. "I want to play a game. I'll be watching you, and you'll never know when I might show up. It's like your own personal horror movie."
I hung up instantly, my heart pounding as I set the phone aside. My mind raced with thoughts of that distorted voice, each word wrapping around me like a cold shroud. I tried to shake it off, pushing myself to focus on the movie, but it lost its charm amidst my rising anxiety. Why am I getting so worked up over this?
Time passed, and I decided I needed a hot shower to wash off the unsettling feelings. I stepped under the spray, the warmth enveloping me like a protective barrier. The familiar sound of droplets against the tub was comforting, and I closed my eyes, letting the water tumble me into a sense of relaxation.
Suddenly, a noise echoed through the house, ripping me from my peaceful thoughts. I froze, my heart racing as I strained to listen over the sound of the running water. There it was again—a loud thump. My breath quickened as I shut off the water and stepped out, grabbing a towel to wrap around me.
“Hello?” I called into the silence, but my voice shook with fear. I tiptoed towards the hallway, peering into the dark corners of my home. It was empty.
As I rounded the corner, my breath caught in my throat. There, standing in the dim light of the living room, was a figure cloaked in a black robe, their face hidden behind a white mask. My pulse thundered in my ears, and for a moment, time stood still.
“What the fuck!?” I screamed, my voice sharp with terror.
With a sudden movement, he lunged towards me. I spun around, adrenaline coursing through my veins as I sprinted toward my bedroom, heart pounding against my ribcage like a caged animal. I could hear his footsteps behind me—heavy and relentless, echoing like a death knell.
I barely reached my room, slamming the door shut just in time. As I fumbled for the lock, I could hear him banging against the door with a terrifying ferocity. Panic blurred my vision, and I felt a lump in my throat as I sprinted across the room.
I stumbled backward in horror as the door splintered under his assault. With one final push, it broke free, and he charged into the room, tackling me onto the bed.
The room spun as I landed, the weight of him pinning me down. I screamed, fighting against his grip, but it was futile—his strength overpowered me.
“Why are you doing this?” I cried, tears streaming down my cheeks. “Because I wanna hear you scream,” his familiar voice made me freeze. He reached forward, his gloved fingers wrapping around my throat.
My heart stopped at the tattoos that ran up his arms. The tattoos I’ve admired many times in the past. "Noah?” I whimpered. fear, confusion, and excitement running through my veins at once. “What the hell are you doing?" I gasped reaching up to tear off his mask.
His brown eyes darkened with intensity as he smiled, revealing a row of perfect white teeth. He was breath taking, but all I could focus on was why he was doing this. I met Noah a couple months ago, at a bar in town. We had exchanged numbers, and even hung out multiple times.
I had just started a new job, and became extremely overwhelmed. I eventually stopped texting him, and seeing him, not having time for a relationship. "I couldn't stay away any longer, Y/N," he said, his voice low and rough. "I've been watching you for months, fantasizing about this moment.”
I was shocked by my body's reaction to his words. I should have been terrified, kicked him out, even called the police, but my skin tingled with desire. Noah's eyes burned with a feral hunger as he traced a finger down my neck, sending shivers through me.
"I want you Y/N," he whispered, his hot breath caressing my face. “Let me have you.” He groaned, rutting his hips against mine softly. Before I could respond, his lips crashed down on mine, hungry and demanding. I moaned into his mouth, my body betraying my fear. His tongue danced with mine, and I tasted the sweet desperation for me on his lips.
His hands roamed over my body, his touch sending sparks through my veins. He yanked my towel open, exposing my naked flesh to his hungry gaze. His fingers traced my curves, making me arch into his touch. I could feel his dick pressing against my thigh, a reminder of the danger and excitement of the moment.
Before I could respond, his lips crashed down on mine, hungry and demanding. I moaned into his mouth, my body betraying my fear. His tongue danced with mine, and I tasted the sweetness of desire mixed with a hint of darkness.
Noah's hands roamed over my body, his touch sending sparks through my veins. He untied my towel, exposing my naked flesh to his hungry gaze. His fingers traced my curves, making me arch into his touch. I could feel his erection pressing against my thigh, a reminder of the danger and excitement of the moment.
"You want me Y/N?" he growled, his voice hoarse. "Tell me you want me, beg for it"
I nodded, unable to form words as his hand slid between my thighs, his fingers finding my wet slit. He stroked it slowly, building the tension until I was squirming beneath him.
"Please, Noah," I begged, my voice hoarse. "I need you." He chuckled, a dark, wicked sound, and slid himself down between my thighs. He pressed his tongue against the inside of knee, dragging up towards my throbbing core.
He ghosted his lips over my sensitive clit. His hot breath making me shiver. I ran my fingers through the top of his hair, gently tugging his head closer. He let out another low chuckle before finally licking up my soaked slit. “Oh fuck..”‘I whined breathless.
“You like that baby?” He grinned up at me, gently circling my clit with his finger, before pushing it inside of me. “Uh huh..” I whined, unable to form a coherent sentence. He leaned back in, sucking my clit into his mouth softly. He added a second finger, pumping them faster.
“Cum for me y/n, cum all over my fingers baby.” He groaned, flicking his tongue faster. “Fuck Noah…I’m gonna cum.” I moaned, my back arching from the mattress. “That’s right baby.” He mumbled, nipping at the insides of my thighs.
My whole body tensed as I finished, my walls clenching hard around his fingers. He groaned, fucking me through it. Once I came to, I sat up grabbing his face and pulling up towards me in a heated messy kiss. I flipped us around, straddling his thighs as he looked up at me in shock.
“My turn.” I smiled, kissing his lips softly. The white mask laying beside us caught my eye. He watched carefully as I reached over to retrieve it. “You wanna wear it?” He laughed gripping my hips, dragging my cunt over his hardened bulge.
I smiled running my hand through the side of his hair. “I want you to.” I whispered, my lips brushing his. His eyes shot up in surprise, a small smirk covering his lips. Without another word, I slipped the mask back over his head.
I kissed his lips over the mask, before pushing him down onto the mattress. I slid down his thighs, making myself comfy between them. I heard him groan as I kissed his dick through his pants. His hips bucked up as I continued teasing him.
“Please baby…I wanna feel your mouth.” I instantly gave in, not being able to wait any longer. I unbuttoned his jeans and freed his length, feeling it throb in my hand.
I stroked him slowly, enjoying the way his breath hitched beneath the mask. His dick was hot and hard, veins popping as I pumped my fist up and down. Pre-cum glistened at the tip, and I leaned down, to lick it off teasingly. The salty taste of him on my tongue made me moan, and I knew I had to take him into my mouth right then.
Lowering myself, I took the head of his cock between my lips, swirling my tongue around the smooth crown. His hips bucked off the bed, trying to fuck my mouth, but I held him firm, setting the pace. I wanted to drive him crazy, push him to the edge of sanity. My lips slid down his shaft, taking him deep, until I felt his pubic hair tickling my nose.
The sound of his muffled moans filled the room as I sucked and teased, using my tongue and the warmth of my mouth to drive him crazy. I could feel his thighs trembling, his control slipping away. His hands gripped my hair, as he slowly thrusted up into my mouth.
I softly squeezed the base before pulling off his dick with a pop, I teased the head with my tongue, swirling and flicking, before taking him back into the wet heat of my mouth. I looked up at him through the slits of the mask, as his hands fisted my hair tightly.
Before I could do anything else, he quickly jerked me up and flipped us over and slid himself down between my thighs. With one swift thrust, he filled me up. I cried out, my nails digging into his back as I felt every inch of his throbbing dick.
Noah pounded into me relentlessly, his tattoos a blur as he moved with primal urgency. His hands gripped my hips, leaving marks on my skin, a reminder of his possession. I matched his rhythm, meeting his savage thrusts with my own, our bodies becoming a tangle of sweat and pure animalistic need.
"You're so fucking tight, baby," he grunted, his hand coming up around my throat. "Whose pussy is this?” He grunted, not letting up. I whined, at the feeling of his dick stretching me out deliciously. “Yours…” He stared down at me through the mask, squeezing my throat tighter. “And don’t fucking forget it.”
His words ignited a fire within me, and I clawed at his back, urging him on. Each thrust pushing me closer to the edge. His fingers found my clit, and he rubbed it in perfect rhythm with his thrusts, sending me spiraling towards another release.
"You gonna cum baby?," he commanded, his voice a growl. "I can feel your pussy squeezing me." He groaned, laying his forehead against mine. I reached up, tearing the mask off for the second time tonight, desperate to feel his lips again. I felt my orgasm coming, as his tongue explored my mouth. He groaned fucking me harder. “Good fucking girl.”
His words sent me over the edge. I cried out his name as my orgasm ripped through me, my body shaking uncontrollably. He grunted above me, his body tensing as he filled me up with his hot cum.
As our breathing slowed, Noah collapsed onto the bed beside me. I turned to face him, my body still humming with pleasure. “Stay..” I whispered, lightly running my finger down the tattoo on his throat. He smiled, wrapping his arm around my waist, pulling me into him. “Of course…I’m not finished with you yet.”
#noah sebastian#bad omens#badomensimagines#noah sabastian smut#noahsebastiancult#bad omens cult#imagines#bad omens band#bad omens smut#kinktober
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My Sweet Pet - A Suo x Reader x Sakura Fanfic Part 3 (Final)
You’re a hybrid cat girl in a pet shop, and Sakura Haruka is a fellow hybrid in the cage beside you. After becoming friends, he promises to protect you. A week later, you’re both purchased by Suo Hayato.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Smut. 18+. Fem reader. Hybrid AU. Suo and Sakura are bisexual. Oral sex. Overstimulation. Lots of cum. Use of aphrodisiacs. Threesome. Voyeurism. Humiliation. Dividers by @anitalenia and @benkeibear!
Thunder crashes, making you cry out in fear. You’ve always been terrified of storms, your sensitive ears picking up the rumbling thunder far too loudly. You sit up in bed and look around the large, empty room. For the first time since Suo brought you here, you miss your cage. At least then you were right next to Haruka, and during storms he would hold your hand through the bars and talk to you despite his shyness.
Maybe he’s still awake! You pull back the covers, pull on a dress just to avoid being naked, and head down the hallway to Haruka’s room.
It’s been a week since the two of you made love for the first time, and he told you he loves you too. Since then you’ve only had sex one more time, during one of your nightly sessions in Suo’s room. While you’d like to be intimate with Haruka more often, and you think he wants to as well, you’re both too shy to initiate anything on your own.
As for Suo, he’s never had sex with you yet. You’ve pleased him with your mouth and hands, and he’s pleased you with his, but nothing more. Does he not want to? Or… does he think you only want to do that with Haruka?
The truth is that you’ve fallen for Suo just as you fell for Haruka. You love both of them.
You stop outside Haruka’s door and knock very lightly. If he’s asleep, you don’t want to wake him. There’s no answer, so you crack the door and peek in. You can hear him snoring softly, see the vague shape of him sprawled on the bed in the dark.
Closing the door quietly, you sigh and head back down the hall. Thunder cracks again, making you yelp and shudder.
There was no session in Suo’s room tonight. He had to go to some sort of meeting and told you and Haruka to “have fun without him”. The two of you ended up watching a movie together on the couch.
Suo said he would be home late, but looking closely, you can see light coming from under his door further down the hall. Is he home? And awake?
You walk to his door and start to knock, but hesitate. He’s probably tired from his meeting. Deciding you shouldn’t bother him, you turn to walk back to your room. That’s when you hear his voice carry through the door.
“Is someone there?”
You stop. “Um, it’s just me,” you say.
“Would you like to come in?”
You open the door slowly and step inside. Suo is sitting up in bed, a laptop open in his lap. You notice right away that his eyepatch is gone, but his hair is hanging over his face, covering his right eye.
“I’m sorry to bother you.”
He smiles. “You’re no bother. I was just looking over some financial reports. Is everything alright?”
“Oh, yes, everything’s fine!” you say, a little flustered. “I was just having trouble sleeping and-“
Thunder cracks loudly, so hard that the windows rattle. You shriek and cover your ears, hunkering down in terror. Once the thunder quiets, you look up and see Suo closing his laptop. He pulls back the covers and says, “Do you want to come lay beside me until the storm passes?”
“But, you must be tired…”
He pats the bed. “I’m not tired at all. Come.”
Your heart beats a little faster as you walk over to his bed and crawl in beside him, under the covers. You’re not sure how close you should get, so you stay several inches away from him.
“Did your meeting go well?” you ask, trying to break the awkward silence.
“Yes, very well. Thank you for asking,” he replies, his tone polite as always.
Another crack of thunder, and you wince, closing your eyes tightly. Suo moves closer, wrapping one arm around you. “It’s okay,” he says gently, “the storm will pass soon.”
You look up at him, your face flushing with heat at his closeness. It’s strange, but somehow you feel more shy in this situation than you do when you’re sucking his cock.
He’s smiling down at you warmly, and you snuggle in closer against him.
“Have you always been scared of thunder?”
he asks you, his hand absently rubbing your arm.
“For as long as I can remember,” you tell him. “The noise startles me even when I know it’s coming.”
“I’ll be here with you,” he says, “so don’t worry.”
As he speaks, his head tilts slightly, causing his hair to fall across his face and uncover his right eye. Or rather, where his right eye should have been. There’s a mess of scar tissue surrounding the empty socket, spreading out slightly. He notices you looking, and reaches toward his eyepatch on the nightstand.
“I’m sorry, this must frighten you. I’ll cover it up,” he says.
“No, please,” you say, putting a hand on his arm to stop him. “It’s not frightening at all! I’m happy you let me see.”
He pauses, looking at your face. His expression softens. “I’m glad you feel that way.”
Thunder strikes again, and you bury your face in his shoulder, pressing yourself further against him. You notice something then, a firm bulge in his lap. Your eyes move to his face. “Suo,” you say, carefully watching his reaction, “can I… touch you?”
He hesitates for a moment, then smiles. “You can do whatever you want, kitten.”
Slowly, you slide one hand down his body, under the covers, and softly rub the bulge between his legs through his silk sleep pants. You can feel him getting harder under your touch, and you keep eye contact as you slip your hand beneath his pants. His breathing gets a little faster as you grip his warm shaft and move your hand up and down it.
Still staring at his face, you ask, “Suo, do you not want to have sex with me?”
He reaches down and puts his hand on yours, stopping your motion. “We don’t have to do that. You have Sakura, right?”
Ah, so your guess was right! He thinks you only love Haruka! You suddenly pull the covers back and roll over onto him, straddling his lap, your knees on either side of him. In one quick motion you pull your dress over your head and toss it aside. Suo’s lone eye moves down your naked body, his face looking surprised.
Your face is burning with embarrassment, but you won’t back down now. “Y-you said I can do whatever I want, right?”
His hands are at his sides, but you can feel his cock throb against your skin. He must feel how wet you are already. “Yes, whatever you want,” he says.
You’ve never had sex in this position before, but it looked very pleasurable in the demonstrations you saw as part of your training. You rise up slightly and use your hand to position him right, then you sink down onto his cock. You gasp, realizing this position lets him go very deep very quickly.
His hands move to your thighs, gripping them as you begin moving up and down, riding him with your head tossed back, moaning his name.
You glance down at him and see that he’s watching you intently, as if he’s transfixed. You lean over him, putting your face close to his. “Suo… I do love Haruka… but I love you too! My heart beats for both of you!”
His eye goes impossibly wide, a faint pink tint to his face. You’ve never seen him blush before. Then, as if a thread stretched tight within him suddenly snapped, he rises up, pulling you tighter to him and thrusting up into you. His mouth finds yours, kissing you with more passion than he’s ever displayed before.
There’s a strange desperation in the way his arms encircle you, pulling you so close that it feels like your bodies will meld into one. There’s a hunger in the way his lips kiss your neck. That’s when it dawns on you: Suo is lonely. You’ve seen no sign of any family or friends since you’ve been here, only the hired servants whom he seems to have little interaction with.
You understand that feeling. Before Haruka was brought into the shop, you were the only cat hybrid there for three days, but before that, you were at a different shop for nearly a year with no other cats. Even earlier, in training, you had no friends to speak of. You were different from the other cats - more timid and quiet.
You’re sure Haruka understands as well. He clearly wasn’t socialized like most hybrids. For him to be as feral as he was when he was brought in, he was probably alone for most of his life.
And now the three of you are together.
You place your hands on Suo’s face, looking closely at him as you both breathe hard. You lean forward and lick over his scar, gently, as if trying to heal him.
In response, his grip on you tightens, and his hips lift from the bed, plunging into you even deeper. It feels so good, being fucked so deeply by someone you love. Feeling him inside you, against you, pushes you to your climax.
Thunder crashes again, just as you cum. But this time, wrapped in his arms, his seed shooting into your depths, you hardly even notice it.
*******************************
Sakura has noticed the change. How could he not? He’s hyper aware of two specific people at all times: his new owner Suo, and the woman he loves. For the past few days, they’ve seemed closer, more comfortable with each other. On one hand, Sakura is relieved that Suo has seemingly developed feelings for her. It means he’s very unlikely to hurt her (and makes any implied threats empty). On the other hand, Sakura can’t help wanting to have that same sense of closeness and comfort.
He feels it with her, of course. The two of them spend so much time together. But he doesn’t feel it with Suo. He’d rather die than admit he wants to though.
The attraction he feels to Suo is purely physical. That’s what Sakura has told himself since Suo bought him. With that ridiculously pretty face, Suo could seduce anyone. But now, Sakura wonders if that’s all there is to it. He finds himself wanting to talk to the other man, but holding back.
These complicated feelings are swirling in Sakura’s heart when Suo calls the two cats to his room for their “nightly session” as they call it.
Sakura walks in, with her behind him. She rarely seems nervous or shy now, instead seeming excited. He’s excited too, his cock already growing hard in anticipation, as if it’s a natural reaction to walking into this room. God, Suo already has them trained.
Suo is waiting for them with that irritating smile on his face. He crosses the room and kisses her on the cheek affectionately, then regards Sakura with the usual oddly blank expression before telling the cat to sit on the floor.
Sakura does so, sitting with his thighs spread and his ankles crossed in front of him. Suo steps over and squats down in front of him, reaching up with graceful fingers to unbutton Sakura’s shirt. As Suo’s hands move down, grazing over Sakura’s abdomen, the cat blushes red despite his best attempts not to.
Suo moves around behind Sakura, dropping down to his knees behind his pet and nimbly opening Sakura’s pants. Suo’s soft hand slides down into Sakura’s pants and grips his semi-hard cock, then moves up and down it with light, feathery strokes.
Sakura fights to hold back a moan, pressing the back of his fist against his mouth to smother the sound. Suo’s touch feels too good, too soft, for Sakura to ignore. He can feel himself getting harder in the other man’s hand. Then he hears Suo’s voice behind him, close to his ear.
“Kitten, let’s give Sakura a treat tonight. Take off your dress for him.”
Without hesitation, she pulls off her dress, dropping it to the floor at her feet. Sakura looks at her, and all hope he had of keeping himself from getting fully hard is gone in an instant. No matter how many times he sees her like this, it always takes his breath away. She’s so beautiful, and seeing her so exposed and vulnerable for him, knowing he and Suo are the only ones who get to see this lovely sight, makes his whole body heat up.
“Come to us,” Suo tells her, then pauses and says, “I know! Get on your knees and crawl to Sakura.”
Sakura frowns, looking up at her sharply. “You don’t have to do that!”
But she’s already getting on the floor and beginning to crawl toward him on her hands and knees. Oh fuck, she looks so good like this! She’s staring at him, at his open pants, at Suo’s wrist peeking out from the fabric.
As she nears them, Suo pulls Sakura’s cock out, his hand still stroking Sakura’s length. She gets impossibly close, her eyes glassy as they watch Suo’s gliding hand. “Haruka,” she says in such a sweet voice, “can I lick it?”
Sakura feels like his face is on fire as he breathes hard. He nods, watching her, enraptured as she leans forward and licks his tip. Her saliva mixes with his precum, and Suo’s thumb circles the tip, spreading it all around as she licks along the shaft.
A groan escapes Sakura’s mouth. Everything feels so fucking amazing. Suo’s hand expertly stroking him, her warm mouth closing around him, suckling his leaking fluids… it’s almost too much.
She takes him deeper into her mouth as Suo’s hand remains at the base, making gentle twisting motions. Suo’s free hand slides down between Sakura’s thighs and lightly squeezes his balls. Sakura shudders between the two of them, feeling weak.
“You’re close, aren’t you?” Suo asks. “Go ahead and cum in her cute little mouth. She wants you to.”
Sakura glances down at her questioningly. She nods, not letting him slip out of her mouth. “Mmhmm,” she mumbles around him.
Oh fuck. This is his shameful fantasy come true. The thought of sullying her sweet mouth with his cum…
His will to fight any of this melts away, and he cums with a groan, filling her with his seed.
Suo’s hands pull away, but her lips remain wrapped around him, sucking out the last drops.
Sakura is barely aware of the other man standing up and moving around, only to sink down to his knees behind her.
**********************
When Suo lowers himself behind you, you can’t help being embarrassed even now. After all, you’re on the floor, your face in Haruka’s crotch, your ass in the air.
“Keep doing that until Sakura cums again,” Suo tells you, and you’re happy to comply. Having Haruka in your mouth makes you feel giddy with pleasure. His soft cock is already starting to get hard again as you lovingly lick and suck on it.
Haruka makes a sound that’s half moan, half whine, and you hear fabric rustling behind you as Suo gently pushes your knees apart. His fingers slide up and down your slit. “She’s dripping, Sakura,” he says, making you blush even more. “I guess sucking you off turns her on.”
Haruka’s cock twitches in your mouth, fully erect now. Just then, you feel Suo slide his own cock inside you from behind, going all the way in. You cry out around Haruka’s cock, the motion pushing you further against him, pressing him further down your throat.
“F-fuck!” Haruka mutters, his hand swiftly moving to your head to steady you.
Oh god, they’re both inside you!
Suo begins thrusting into your quivering pussy, slowly but deeply, each thrust rocking you forward on Haruka’s cock. Suo’s hand rubs down your back, along your spine, until it reaches your tail. He grips it, firmly but not hard, then gives it a light tug. Your whole body jerks. You didn’t even realize how sensitive the base of your tail is! You moan, your tongue swirling around Haruka’s tip.
You’re feeling delirious as pleasure fills you, and in the midst of this, you hear Suo’s voice again as he leans slightly over you.
“You’re so pretty when you’re sucking Sakura’s cock,” he says to you, then he raises back up, thrusting a little faster now. “Isn’t that right, Sakura?”
You glance up at Haruka’s red-tinted face. He looks away from you awkwardly. “She’s always pretty,” he says.
Suo laughs. “Well, that’s true! She’s really pretty when she’s eating dinner and starts humming without realizing it!”
Eh?? You didn’t know you’d been humming!
“Or,” Haruka adds, his eyes shifting back to your face, “when she first wakes up and her hair sticks up everywhere.”
“Or when she gets excited and this cute little tail starts swinging around!” Suo says, squeezing your tail just enough to make jolts of pleasure shoot through you.
Haruka’s eyes looking down at you are so warm and loving. “Or when she’s in the garden and puts a flower in her hair… she’s so beautiful.”
Your face is burning, listening to them talk about you so adoringly even as their cocks throb inside you. A particularly deep thrust from Suo shoves you forward, Haruka’s cock going halfway down your throat. He grunts, his hand tightening in your hair.
“Are you close again?” Suo asks him.
Haruka nods.
“Hold on, let’s cum in her at the same time,” Suo says.
The thought thrills you. You hear their voices, speaking back and forth to get the timing right, your body so stimulated that you can hardly make out their words.
And then, they both cum, within two seconds of each other, filling both your mouth and your pussy. The sensation is enough to make you cum as well, your body trembling between them as they stay buried inside you on both ends.
Ahhh, the feeling of being stuffed so full of the two men you love!
****************************
Suo is in a good mood as he walks through the front door, getting home late from another meeting. He told his two kitties to enjoy themselves in his room as usual, but he doubts they did so. Last time, according to one of the maids, the two of them watched a movie. They could be strangely shy when he’s not there to spur them on, despite it being obvious that they’d both like to enjoy each other’s bodies more.
As he walks down the hall toward his room, he hears a sound that causes him to pause. It’s a desperate, mewling cry, as if begging for mercy. Are they actually in his room? At this hour?
Almost at the same time, he notices what looks like trash strewn about the carpeted hall. He bends down to pick up a torn open box, and his eye widens.
A few days ago, he’d picked up a box of catnip cookies, thinking he might let his kitties try them during a session. The box warned to only give your cat hybrids one cookie at a time, spaced a few hours in between, as the catnip has a powerful aphrodisiac effect.
The box, which had contained twenty-four cookies, is empty.
Among the debris in the hallway, he spots a familiar dress and a white shirt, both looking as if they’d been tossed aside in a hurry.
Suo stares at his own bedroom door as the cries coming from inside intensify.
“Seriously?” he asks aloud, then laughs as he walks over and opens his door.
He finds his two kitties. The sweet woman he’s come to love so much is sprawled on his desk, all its former contents littering the floor. She’s completely naked, her legs spread wide apart, her hands gripping the edge of the desk as Sakura devours her pussy.
Sakura’s shirtless, his pants open, one of his hands furiously stroking his cock while the other holds her open.
Stepping closer, Suo can see that she’s got tears in her glazed eyes, her skin flushed and sweaty as she murmurs things like, “Haruka… I love you…” and “I can’t take anymore!” She’s clearly overstimulated, and Suo can’t even tell if Sakura can hear her.
He taps Sakura’s shoulder to get his attention, and the cat looks up at him with equally glazed eyes. There’s a puddle of creamy cum on the desk beneath her squirting pussy, and Sakura’s lips and chin are dripping.
Suo smiles. “I see you found the catnip cookies.”
Sakura doesn’t reply, only stares at Suo with that lusty gaze.
“Let me have a taste of her,” Suo tells him, starting to nudge him aside.
But Sakura suddenly straightens up and grabs Suo by the collar, jerking him close and kissing him. Suo can taste her on Sakura’s tongue as it invades his mouth. He finds himself leaning into the kiss, eventually licking along Sakura’s chin. When they separate, Sakura goes back to eating her pussy.
Suo steps around to look down at her face, and notices that it’s covered in Sakura’s cum. He strokes her hair as she stares up at him and says, “Suo… love you…”
These two! They’ve become so precious to Suo that he thinks he could easily kill for them.
“I love you too, kitten. Now,” he says, unbuttoning his pants, “since your face looks so lovely painted in cum, let me add my own color.”
#suo x reader x sakura#suo x reader#sakura x reader#suo hayato x reader#sakura haruka x reader#suo hayato#sakura haruka#wind breaker smut#wind breaker x reader#x reader
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