#I wouldn't care nearly as much if I didn't love the series or believe in its potential

[rawliverandgoronspice]

Or the reason you’re overthinking it is because you’re just trying to find a reason to be mad at the game when you could use that energy at something else to make you happy instead of nitpicking at it.

I suggest you block my account and go have fun with the game unfettered by my takes, you have my Blanket Permission! I'm just a rando with a tumblr blog. Worry about your own happiness first.

[gotham-daydreams]

Weird to say, but I think I'm pretty forgiving of Damien. Yeah, he's rude and ignores the reader, but he probably does the same to everyone else lmao. With Dick who pays careful attention to everyone, it's a betrayal that he would neglect the reader because he should have been an older sibling. Plus Damien is like ten, it's kinda hard for me to hold him accountable when he grew up without knowing better and he's just emulating older members of the family. I'm pretty sure this is how youngest sibling privilege works lol

Yeah, I completely agree! Even then, it can be difficult to know that what you're doing is wrong when you see the people you admire and respect doing the same thing.

Like you said, Damian, in reality, is probably rude to everyone else and ignores them from time to time too. Though for the sake of the "Not [ ]" series, he just so happens to ignore the reader a little more when compared to the rest of the Batfam. Which can still be chalked up to him just following the mannerisms of the family without even thinking much about it.

Regardless, neglect is still neglect and what happened to the reader still isn't right- but I do kind of agree with you that Damian probably holds the least amount of capability. He's young, and you can't really expect him to fully be aware of the effects his actions have on other people, especially when that person:

1. Hasn't expressed how negatively the whole situation has effected them, and they don't exactly appreciate their entire existence getting ignored by so many people. (Which is valid and understandable! Because how can you expect someone who's been ignoring you for so long to not only listen to you, but even acknowledge you enough to notice you have something important to say? How can you expect someone so seemingly set on ignoring you, to care? You can't. So the reader stays quiet, but it is something worth pointing out, I feel.)

2. Again, sees that everyone around them pretty much does the same thing. So it's more of a "if they're doing it, it must be for a reason, so I'll do it too" (since Dick and Bruce are also ignoring you, and Damian actually cares about both of them).

Damian is the least aware that what he did was wrong to begin with because no one told it was, and those around him almost seemed to enable that behavior by continuing to do it themself.

I'd like to believe that maybe his behavior would've changed if he knew how badly it was effecting the reader, but that's also to assume that the others wouldn't. Though who knows?

As for everyone else? They're way past old enough to know that what they're doing is wrong. The neglect as a whole was a "team effort", and even if they won't consider it that, it basically was. All of them neglected you except for Alfred, and they all did it over the course of nearly the reader's entire stay at the Manor. If anyone should've known, it should've been them, and depending on your interpretation of the situation and everything - some are more at fault for neglecting the reader when compared to others.

Especially if they seemingly didn't ignore and tried to spend time with/bond with other members of the family, but the reader just didn't make the cut time and time again.

Like you said — Dick is easily one of the worst offenders simply because he's loving and all this stuff to the Batfam, but just not to the reader —and especially when compared to Damian who was just none the wiser for the most part.

[goddessofmischief]

Hey, thanks for tagging :) I am 34, so the "old men" are not so old to me and quite frankly, watching Shanks, Buggy and Mihawk in OPLA is feeling like coming home to old friends back from 20 years ago. (I was crushing on Shanks and Buggy so much...😅) So I thought, maybe you could write something where fem!reader already knows them and has a soft spot for each of them, since back when they were flirting and making fun when they were young. Now as adults they meet again and the chemistry is still there.

I remember one of my stories from back then. I was jealous of mermaids, because all the pirates got stupid once they're around, and a drunk Shanks said: "nah, you wouldn't like to be one; You'd be missing slamming doors and Buggy would drown on daily basis just to say hi-." Both Buggy and Reader: "shut up! So not true!". Just like young stupids are... :)

Anyways, thanks for your writing and I can't wait to read more about the "get-shit-done"-squad Mihawk, Shanks and Buggy

     — MERMAIDS (YOUNG SHANKS X READER, YOUNG BUGGY X READER)

A/N: Hope this is alright: since your formal request was so in line with what the theme of the series will be anyway, I used the excerpt of your line as basis for this particular fic. All credit of course goes to you for coming up with the lines and the idea. On a personal note, I just want to say how much I respect that you were an OG fic writer and still have interest in and love for these characters. Welcome home.

...

You would have believed that you had been at sea for years, until Buggy reminded you that it had only been weeks.

Granted, this is how he reminded you:

"It's been wee-eks," Buggy whined, stretching out on his hammock. Shanks was collapsed against the wall, fingers knotted together, eyes not really focused on any particular place.

And you? You were lying on the floor, gazing up at the wooden ceiling, wondering if it would be a good idea to leave the cabin and see the stars.

Being on the ship for weeks was highly irregular for your crew. Great captain he was, Roger knew he could only keep this ragtag group sane if they stepped onto shore and ate an orange every once in awhile. This concern was triply inflated by the fact that he had three young adults onboard who became very antsy if they had to stay in one place for too long. Your patience certainly rivaled Buggy's or even Shanks', but even you had your limit, and you had met it long ago.

The ship would have planned to make port nearly a week before, but the World Government was closer to finding you than ever. It was simply too dangerous.

You soon learned how your friends reacted to a situation such as this. Shanks had retreated mostly into silence, with exception of the odd joke or attempt at conversation, and Buggy had decided he blamed you both somehow for this situation and that any words exchanged with either of you would only be of the complaining nature.

"I know, Bugs," said Shanks, and you were surprised to hear him answer Buggy's complaint. You exchanged glances with him, then turned back to Buggy.

"Let's go outside, yeah?" you suggested. "Do something fun."

"Everyone's outside," Buggy complained. "They've been yelling over something for hours."

"And you didn't think that was important to mention, Bugs?" Shanks asked, irritably. Buggy shrugged.

...

The thing that had sparked such interest in the crew was simply that, as your ship had sailed very far into the deepest waters, much farther than usual, you had sailed into a home of mermaids. Extremely dangerous, and the crew knew it.

It did not negate their interest whatsoever, though.

Pirates get stupid when mermaids are around. It is a core trait of pirates and no less than a sacred tenet of piracy itself. More than a few decent men have been seduced to the sea by the very concept of mermaids, and to that end, the idea of finding one.

Shanks and Buggy were no exception.

You had never really taken the care to notice how they behaved with girls. Their flirting was of no interest to you, and so you didn't bother to surveil it. But it came to your attention now that they had terribly different styles: namely, that Buggy was mostly content to sit and watch from the edge of the deck, and Shanks was more interested in yelling, waving, and nearly falling off the boat.

Granted, by this time, alcohol had become involved, and all bets were off.

Despite all the excitement, the first in weeks, Shanks had begun to notice how quiet you'd become. He approached you, somewhat cautiously, hoping you wouldn't react with a retort or a threat.

"You okay?"

You nodded, staring at the drink you held.

"You sure?"

You shrugged, whispering something under your breath that Shanks struggled to hear.

"What's that?"

You spoke again, slightly more than a whisper, but Shanks heard it all the same.

"...I wish I was a mermaid."

"You wish you were a mermaid?" He repeated loudly, almost outraged. You shushed him, and he just laughed.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's just... nah, you wouldn't like to be one. You'd be missing... slamming doors, and Buggy would drown himself on a daily basis just to say hi-"

"Shut up!" you giggled. "So not true!"

"And then, of course, there'd be all the pirates. I wouldn't like sharing you with them."

"I'm a pirate. You're a pirate."

"I'm a different sort of pirate. And you're barely a pirate at all."

You shrank back, inexplicably hurt by Shanks' drunken offhand insult.

"I'm as much of a pirate as you."

"Of course you are. I didn't mean that. Not like that. I mean, you're just... you're very careful, you're much too good for us. You're not messy or mean like the rest of us are."

"What do you think I am, then?"

"A princess," he blurted out, and you tried not to laugh. "I've always thought so."

"Always?"

"Mhm. The whole time."

You studied Shanks' face, seeing him in a new light that you'd never glimpsed anyone in before. Had he always been this cute, or charming, or kind?

Well, it didn't matter if he always had been, because he was now, and before you had given much thought to it at all you were pushing his straw hat back and he was meeting your lips in a kiss, your first, his first.

"You're a terribly nice pirate," you mumbled.

"You're a terribly beautiful princess," he replied.

You both parted awkwardly, staring at each other with confused half-smiles and resigning to focusing your attentions back on the ocean. For now, it was merely a strange evening, a shooting star, but later on, you would remember that night as the precise moment you began to love Red-Haired Shanks.

And Buggy, watching from across the ship, would remember that night as the second time a deep knot of resentment grew in his chest, one that would only become larger with time. The first time had been as a child, when Shanks had done something exceptionally well where Buggy had failed, and Roger placed his famous straw hat onto his head.

The second time was tonight, because of you.

taglist: @sawendel @twinklesnake

[creedslove]

HEARTLESS 💔 - PART SEVENTEEN

Agent Whiskey (Jack Daniels) x f!reader

Summary: the morning after the night you and the cowboy spent together had everything to be full of love, but a visit is going to ruin your plans

(this is the seventeenth chapter of the HEARTLESS 💔 series)

• Part one to sixteen on my MASTERLIST

Warnings: sad thoughts, mentions of depression, mentions of suicide attempt, fluff, angst, mom!reader

A/N: what can I tell you besties? I know it took me a long time but here's our cowboy for another ride... some of you didn't like the angst was back, but well, we know their love is stronger than anything that goes on, right?!

4.3k words

"I love you"

Those three simple words echoed through the cowboy's head as he watched you close your exhausted eyes and drift off to sleep. He pulled you closer to him, your head resting against his chest, heart beating fast, nose buried into your beautiful hair while his hands rubbed your back and traced invisible patterns all over your skin while he thought of everything that went on between the two of you. He had exhausted you, hell, he was exhausted himself and yet he couldn't fall asleep, the emotions of the latest events still running through his veins like adrenaline stopping him from simply closing his eyes and relaxing. You loved him, he knew that, in fact, everyone did, even though the heartbreak you had was the biggest, saddest and most intense situation you had ever gone through, it still wasn't enough to erase the feelings you felt for a certain cowboy; just as his desperate, pathetic and insisting trials of moving on, forgetting about you or even trying to hate on were just as big of a failure as he was. He loved you deeply, simply and raw. The kind of love that unabled him from moving on, from trying again, the kind of love that took away all the thrill in going out for one night stands like he often did before you walked into his life. The kind of love that made him think it wasn't worth living anymore, not while he was lacking that love, when he made the worst mistake of his life, choosing his own grief over his actual family, too scared to move on and being trapped in the past because it didn't scare him as much, when he thought the safest for the three of you would be going separate ways, so you wouldn't hurt him with the constant memory of his first wife and unborn son, so he wouldn't torture himself with the fear of betraying her memory and not being able to be there wholeheartedly for you and your son. He was scared, not only that, he was terrified and in his clouded judgment, he really believed he was doing the right thing, of course now he had a healthier mindset he could clearly see the kind of shit he engaged himself into and nearly lost for good the chance of being happy once more. He loved you so much, but he realized he had always taken it for granted, assuming you would always be around, and once he kicked you out of his life, a part of him assumed - and even hoped for - there would be a return; that you would crawl back to him, beg him to take you and your son back, but he was proven wrong once more when he met your power, your strength, and just then, when he didn't have you, he realized how much he truly loved you. Perhaps it was because of all the years of loneliness that followed the death of his wife and son, and Jack associated love with absence, that was one of the fruity, fancy things his therapist had said. He had tried several times starting therapy, but he never really engaged in it, he never really cared for it, and he was so sure it wouldn't be different when Champ set his cards on the table and told Whiskey would get only a suspension, therapy sessions and a shitty excuse of being brain damaged after being shot in the head, instead of being fired from the Statesman, kicked out like an old dog and sent to prison. At that moment, Jack sort of thought that was exactly what he deserved.

He was hopeless, knowing that he had made the worst mistake of his life, pushing away the family God had gifted him, his second chance of being happy and protecting the ones he loved and yet, he had been blind to see it. At that point of his life, his son growing from a tiny little dot in an ultrasound, to a small baby and finally evolving into a cute toddler he couldn't lie to himself any longer, not like when he told himself that dropping amounts of cash in your bank account here and there were enough. He knew they weren't. For the first time, he understood the weight of the stares and the silent judgments from people around him: Helen, his sister, Champ, Ginger, Tequila. It was no secret what happened, and it was also no secret he had made his family go away.

He was lost, he was lonely, he didn't have anything to live for. He thought that by sabotaging the mission he would be able to finally get some sort of revenge over whoever killed his wife and son - the cops could never identify them - but when he had the control of the situation, even for a brief period of time, he didn't feel anything, he was numb. Perhaps the excuse they came up with for the official Statesman reports wasn't so wrong, maybe Jack had had some kind of brain damage because of the shot, the first evidence would be Ginger resetting his memory by using a picture of you and Wyatt; he never knew how she got that picture of the two of you in the first place, his guess would be you being under the Statesman's protection program that covered the agent's families.

When he woke up from his comatose, he was so full of energy, as if he was twenty something again; seeing that hot chick in a lab coat with that sterile environment around that was somehow both so familiar and yet completely unknown to him, all he felt like doing was jumping off that bed and wooing her into bed with him, that was when she showed him a picture of a pretty lady. He looked at her, she was gorgeous, he knew he had seen her before but he couldn't remember at all. The lab coat lady watched him with confusion but took another picture out of her pocket and the moment Jack laid eyes on it, it felt like his head was exploding. Everything coming back to him at the same time, all of the memories returning, the tragedies, the happy moments, broken hearts and mended hearts all at once. His head was pounding as if someone pierced through his skull with a knife until he was brought back into his senses, but then, he was numb again.

He was numb because he had lost two families, one of them was taken away from him and the other he had pushed it away, and he would never forgive himself for that. He was a broken man, he was hopeless, he was a coward. He had tried ending his miserable, empty and useless life a couple of times, but he was just too much of a coward to do it right. It was like he somehow asked for help, when he thought he only deserved to be six feet under. He had no reason to live, so he took the opportunity he needed in order to try his final act. He went after Eggsy and Harry, knowing eventually someone would stop him. Deep down, Jack knew his plan was kind of stupid and it didn't even make that much sense, but he had to tried, in his mind, the best case scenario was someone ending his everlasting pain and he could finally find peace, and he was sure he was going to make it, the moment his lasso got stuck and he was meeting the meat grinder, he closed his eyes, praying it would be painless and fast, and the last image that crossed his mind was you.

You running to him like you often did, getting off Silver Pony and rushing to meet him, wrapping your arms around his neck and crash your lips gently for a welcome home kiss. This time, however, Wyatt would be with you, looking exactly like he did the last time Jack decided to follow the two of you through the street, and his heart tightened, it was too fast for him to notice it had been you, and not his late wife that crossed his mind in his final moments, and his heart tightened, he didn't have time left, but perhaps in the afterlife, he would be as happy as he could've been with you and your son.

And then that young man pulled him back.

His cowboy hat had already been shredded when he felt himself being lifted up and taken away from that real life nightmare. Whiskey knew he wasn't the best person in the world and he had had his fair share of bad actions, but he didn't think he deserved to die that way, not in such a cruel and gruesome way, that would be heartbreaking to everyone. He couldn't even imagine how Helen or his beloved sister would take the news that they couldn't even see his body because technically there wouldn't be much left of him, so for that, he was relieved. His memories of that day were kind of foggy, after he'd been knocked out by Eggsy, he only woke up at the Statesman's headquarters.

The first few days after the mission were pretty odd, everyone stared at him as if he was a traitor, and to be honest he was, not to Statesman, it wasn't anything personal, he would always love that company, the people who worked there and also his job, but he had betrayed himself. Whenever he walked down the hallways for his humiliating therapy sessions, he thought about how he needed to see you, but there was no way he could find you at that moment, not with the surveillance Champ had placed behind him all the time, after what happened, he worried the other agents would assume he was going to try to harm you and Wyatt somehow.

So Jack went to therapy instead, at first thinking he was just wasting his time and rolling his eyes at everything the therapist said, that until his words began hitting him deep, and slowly the cowboy started opening up, and before he could tell, the tears ran freely down his cheeks as he poured his heart out, in hopes he could be fixed.

All that painful path was what led Jack back with his family, after doing things wrong like he very often did, he managed to crawl back into your heart, after he showed you he loved and cared so much about you, despite being a dick, and you also gave in, because you were tired of fighting off the feelings you had for him and above all, the longing to have a real, stable family with him, so he cherish and appreciated those moments, even if they still seemed too good to be true, he vowed himself to make you happy for the rest of your life and never take you and Wyatt for granted. In the painful memories, his arms tightened the grip around you, making sure you were there, safe in his embrace and you shifted softly, smiling at the fact you had always had a deep sleep.

He watched you as you slept, he had always loved doing that, seeing your chest raising up and down at your calm breathing, he rested his head on him, closing his eyes and concentrating into your heartbeat, you were alive, well, in his arms, that cowboy couldn't wish anything else in his life, and yet, he did. He had one more desire, something you had already denied, you'd been adamant about it even, but that all had happened before you had changed your mind, before you broke the cowboy hat rule and told him you wanted to be with him, you wanted your family to work. He wanted a baby with you, another member of the Daniels family, he wasn't in a hurry, now that he had you and that you weren't going anywhere, now that you were staying next to him, watching Wyatt grow up and taking care of him. He wanted to make things right, like he was supposed to have done it once you two were together at first, he should've stepped in, become a man and treated you exactly the way you deserved it: like his wife.

And once you two were settled on that, he wanted you to have another baby, a baby girl if he could choose, because that cowboy wouldn't resist a tiny little princess looking like her mommy, the love of his life. He just knew, without even trying too hard that the moment that little girl opened her eyes, she would have that old cowboy wrapped around her tiny little finger in a heartbeat. He chuckled at the mere picture of it, shifting your body so you would lay your back on the mattress and rested his head on your stomach, closing his eyes as he imagined and prayed hard a little dot could be growing inside of your womb already. He just wanted to be there for you, for Wyatt and for the new baby you could maybe have together. His lips trailed a path of kisses right under your belly button, his mustache tickling your skin softly, but not enough to wake you up.

"Come to us soon, my baby" he whispered into your womb and fell asleep.

•••

You washed your face with fresh water and stared at yourself in the mirror, liking what you were seeing: no dark bags under your eyes, silky hair looking good after your brushed it - after all, your cowboy had a huge soft spot for your hair - and a glow that you recognized from the times you were feeling extremely happy and alive. Giggling as you analyzed yourself in the mirror, you could see the marks that hungry cowboy had left on you. You neck marked with a trail of hickeys that drove you insane at the moment you got them; feeling another wave of warmth down your core, you decided not to cover it up with makeup or any accessory, there was no need to it, after all, you and your son would be staying on the ranch for the next days and it was so secret to anyone there - or anyone outside of it once you returned to the city - you were the cowboy's and he was yours.

It was madness to think that everything you felt the night before could become a routine like it had been once, that all the pleasure Jack gave you, he could give you again over and over every single day; that man could be a little distant if one didn't know him yet, but from the moment you get to know him and he takes a like on you, Jack Daniels vows himself to please you as best as he can. It wasn't different with you, he knew exactly what to do to you, your weak spots, it was his sweet way of domination, and now that you woke up drunk in love, you would be glad to let that man dominate you for the rest of your life.

Jack was still sleeping when you exited the bathroom, his face buried deep into your pillow, making you giggle, he had always been a needy sweet man after all. You lifted the blankets and got rid of your slippers so you could join your cowboy in bed when soft knocked interrupted you; you widened your eyes, knowing it could only be your son. A wave of guilt rushed through your body as you hadn't even thought of him for the past hours, being so deep into the experience you shared with your man, but thinking about it, Wyatt was safe and sound, asleep after the best weekend of his little life and his mommy and daddy did deserve some time on their own.

You opened the door to him, smiling as your son hugged your waist and giggled

"Hi mommy!" He said with his sweet bright eyes, not letting go of you until you took him into his arms and lifted him up. Wyatt looked inside the room curiously and gasped as he saw his daddy asleep, staring into his eyes he giggled "why did you have a sleepover with daddy and not me, mommy?" He tilted his head and wrapped his tiny arms around your neck "I miss you mommy" he whispered into your ear and snuggled and you felt like your heart was bursting with love. Your son was just so sweet and adorable and you also missed him, it had been just the two of you against everything and everybody for most of his life and you saw it then that the two of you missed it.

"I miss you too very very much, my little cowboy… would you like to snuggle with mommy and daddy some more?" You asked and he nodded eagerly, not letting go of you even if his little life depended on it. You got yourself under the blankets, your son immediately tucked between you and his daddy, but he was facing you, staring at you with his beautiful, soft eyes "you are so pretty mommy" he said sweetly and rested his face against your chest falling asleep.

Jack chuckled and looked at you "seems like you found your love bug, sugar" he winked and ran his fingers through Wyatt's curls, looking at his son with pride in swallowing his heart. You took Jack's hand, entwining your fingers together and sighing "you're so handsome, I hope you know that" you whispered and pecked his neck gently, loving the taste of his skin, just like you love everything else about your sweet cowboy. Whiskey could see how sleepy you were and smiled gently at you "sleep sugar, rest and close your beautiful eyes that I'll be here when you wake up" your cowboy's silky voice was enough to soothe you and make you close your exhausted eyes, falling asleep with your lovely little family.

•••

Wyatt shook his head and frowned confused at the words he had just heard, he had even stopped nibbling on the delicious bread and butter during his breakfast.

"No grandma, daddy loves me!" He said confused and looked up at the older woman, who chuckled and shook her head, you mom just rubbed his back gently and sighed

"I'm sorry baby boy, but daddy doesn't love you.. as grandma said, when mommy had you in her belly, he told mommy to leave and said he never wanted to see you or her again! He doesn't love mommy either, daddy is very selfish and he only cares about himself. Mommy didn't even let grandma come to your birthday party because of him" she said but Wyatt refused to believe her, his daddy loved him and he knew it.

"Why wasn't your daddy around you? Because he didn't love you nor mommy" she shrugged and he jumped off her lap "no, you are lying, grandma!!!"

"I'm not! Don't be a naughty boy!" She censored him raising her voice at the same time you and Jack came downstairs. He had his arms around your waist, pulling you closer and pinching your sides playfully making you giggle and squirm. Jack had his hat in his free hand and he only had eyes for you, however, he noticed immediately how your soft and carefree expression changed into a frown and your jaw clenched, but before he could say anything else, the two of you were welcomed by your son's cries as he looked at you

"It's not true, grandma! Mommy, tell grandma it's not true!" He whined and clung to you, looking up at Jack with eyes filled with tears and sniffling sadly.

Your mom just laughed softly and shrugged "I didn't lie my love, I wish I did but it's the truth" and then she eyed you up and down, the disgust in her face at the clear proximity to the cowboy, how his hand still lingered on your hips and of course how you hadn't even bothered to cover up the hickeys he had left along your skin, she couldn't believe and accept you were back with that man already, and in her twisted mind, she needed to do something about it.

"What did you tell my son, you witch? Huh? My little cowboy was perfectly fine earlier this morning, he was happy and chirping like a damn little bird and now he's crying? What did you do?!" Jack roared, his fatherly instincts kicking in the moment he saw the distress, and knowing how his mother-in-law hated him and apparently wouldn't even spare her own grandson from her petty feelings. The woman just laughed again and folded her arms

"What do you think I said?! I told him the truth about how his daddy had a family he loved very much, the only family he ever loved and when he lost them, he just got another replacement which was his mommy but when she got pregnant with Wyatt, he told her to go away because he didn't love her or her son, he just loved his other family" she shrugged and looked at him. You thought Jack was about to explode, you had never seen him so angry, his face was livid, red with anger and if he could would've attacked her right there and then, but he used all his strength to hold himself back. At the same time you asked your mom harshly what she was doing there, the three of you were stopped by Wyatt's loud sob. He looked up at his dad as tears ran down his face and he cried his little heart out.

"I-Is it true daddy? You don't love me? You love your other family?"

And Jack's heart shattered as hard as he had never felt before, it felt it had been ripped off his chest and shredded to pieces, he couldn't handle the disappointment and hurt into his son's eyes, and all because of him. He shook his head and got on his knees, bloody red eyes full of tears, staring into his son, he tilted his head at the same time his strong hands pulled Wyatt closer "n-no son, daddy loves you and mommy, more than anything. There was a family yes, but they are gone and daddy made a lot of mistakes but I've never stopped loving you, I-"

His heartfelt words were interrupted by the quarrel you and your mom initiated, if Jack was able to control his anger, you couldn't say you owned the same skill he did, quite the opposite, you were shaking with anger and all you could see was your son's hurt feelings, if you felt that way, you couldn't even believe how your cowboy must have felt. Not only that, how your poor son must've been hurt by it, his daddy had been his world ever since they met and now, after your mom's venomous words your son cried his little heart out.

Wyatt couldn't handle that, he liked to see his mommy and daddy happy, playing with him and not crying and yelling at his grandma, so he turned around and ran outside the door, wanting to find the only thing that could calm him down.

You cried and tried controlling your anger, no matter how many times Jack had held you by the waist and tried to convince you to stop yelling and causing a scene, but you couldn't rest and stop until you saw your mother out of Jack's ranch, only when you couldn't see her car down the road was when you felt a little better, still you had a lot of damage control. You cried with anger and sadness, your mom had no right to do what she did, she could hate your future husband as much as she wanted but she could not bring her grandson into it. The way your sweet little boy cried was haunting you and how hurt his poor little heart was. Jack was at a loss of words, he hated he had disappointed his son that way; he felt like a complete failure as a man, and as a father. He couldn't even think of how he ever wanted to have another child, if he could barely handle the one son he already had. You paced the kitchen and finished your glass of water, sighing relieved as Jack walked inside. You frowned softly "where's Wyatt?!" You questioned him and he just mumbled something about him being outside playing with Silver Star.

"Is everything okay?" You asked even though you knew everything was not okay, everything was far from okay, after your mom waltzed into your seeming perfect happy ending and screwed things up; even Jack changed his demeanor, if before he was just all lovey dovey towards you, now it was clear he needed some time on his own. He turned around and faced you, frustration was written all over his face, his body was so tense it was visible so he just clenched his jaw before sighing "Wyatt won't talk to me, you should check up on him, maybe he'll talk to you…" after all your mother fucked it up that was what he wanted to say, but he knew it would be mean, that wasn't himself talking, it was his anger and he could see you were just as stressed as you were, it was not fair he would take it out on you, you didn't deserve this. Jack cleared his throat and looked at you with much softer eyes, taking a step forward and wrapping his arms around you, his embrace was comforting and soothing, as he rubbed your back up and down

"Talk to him, sugar, maybe he won't hate me if you do…" his voice cracked and so did your heart; you couldn't accept your mom was such a heartless person who was willing to end your family's happiness like that, you needed to do something about it.

____

[sagisbrainrot]

hualian is so special to me because the way hua cheng treats xie lian is just so, so precious

for so much of the series, it saddened me to see how much xie lian is burdened with... everything. it is always his job to figure something out, his job to fix it, his job to fight it.

and he just... doesn't mind it at all. in fact, he loves helping and saving people. he legitimately has the mindset of "why should other people be in pain when i can fix it?" which is so noble and admirable, and he does so much with a smile on his face

but it's this mindset that nearly breaks him beyond repair.

during the fall of xian le, he tried everything in his power to stop the events from escalating. even things that weren't even within his power, like carrying rain and trying to help those who were starving was something he took on. trying to help xian le and help the people of yong'an.

even to some degree, mu qing and feng xin were depending on him to figure things out. and i mean, why wouldn't they? he's always figured things out, he's always been smart, always had solutions. always had that "third thing."

until he didn't.

i don't think mu qing nor feng xin were wrong for leaving, because each had their priorities and there was tons of miscommunication between the xianle trio. but it saddened me to see that very few people cared about xie lian for... xie lian.*(see bottom for more on this)

not because he's the crown prince, or because he's a martial god, or because he's beautiful or whatever. but because of him.

in the beginning i never understood why young hua cheng / hong'er kept throwing himself in front of xie lian on the battle field, or why he insisted on never leaving xie lian's side by any means. like dawg, you're a HUMAN. and xie lian is a GOD. but i get it now, honestly.

no one's ever tried to take care of xie lian that way.

he's always the one who jumps in to be hit, to get poisoned, to be the first one to attack. and i mean, he IS (one of) the strongest martial gods for a reason!! but... gods get tired to.

hua cheng's existence in xie lian's life is so important to me because so much of his mindset is "his highness can handle this, but why should he?" he has absolute faith that xie lian can handle anything he wants and offers encouragement consistently but... he also wants xie lian to know that he doesn't have to dive head first anymore.

he doesn't have to be the one taking the hit or at the forefront of the part all the time. there are no "jokes" when it comes to xie lian's health and safety. it doesn't matter how much he's been poisoned, or hurt, or stabbed, or punched.

the scene where xie lian picks up a skull with corpse poison is very important to me because it's the first time xie lian is told "please don't hurt yourself intentionally for us. you can't die, but you can still be hurt and that hurts me. please think about me, and yourself." and it, for the first time, makes him hesitate and contemplate his own safety.

something he never had to consider because no one else did.

--

*this isn't me saying that fx and mq didn't care for xl for who he is. i do whole heartedly believe the mu qing and feng xin feelings are different. while i believe they do love him (as friends or lovers take your PICK), but their situation was entirely different and harder for it to be showed. with mu qing's inner turmoil over his various issues and feng xin being so loyal he didn't come back when xie lian ordered him to leave muddled things. unfortunately though, i do believe someone has to be strong enough to save xl from himself

--

LONG hualian thoughts spawn in me like a virus, i love them so much ima throw up. typos probably all in this but i don't careee

[utilitycaster]

Something the latest Candela episode and panel sort of helped me put into place is one of my frustrations with how Imogen is being played - overall I really like her, especially the exploration of what someone with (at least until recently) unwanted psychic powers might actually look like, but...for lack of a better way to put it, of all of Laura's characters, I feel like she is the most in need of going loud but isn't quite there. Based on Arlo this past episode, I know Laura can do it, and so while I know that episode was probably filmed some time ago, and that the different game systems and story lengths are almost certainly a factor, I really hope this carries over into how she plays Imogen.

Laura's long been one of my favorite performers at the table. I think my one criticism of her, however, would be that she tends to be very failure averse - which is extremely valid and common in D&D players and I can't say I don't feel the same way some time. And, for what it's worth, I think it worked well for Vex and Jester as part of their characterization. Vex is also always trying to angle for an advantage and work in a system that's fucked her over; a core trait is her fear of showing vulnerability, and so of course she won't let herself fail or look stupid. And Jester I think let Laura play someone who was at times disappointed or frustrated (RIP her many Inflict Wounds attempts) but who could also see beauty in the chaos that failed rolls often cause and who did take wild swings.

With Imogen, however, because she's so central to this story and because she is often portrayed as headstrong, impatient, and not always sensitive to the needs of others, I find myself wondering why she's not taking those shots. Even something as small as the most recent episode - not shooting through the hammer - makes me go "why not?" Like, I understand it mechanically, and perhaps (as with all these criticisms) there's something there in the backstory I'm not aware of, but why wouldn't Imogen do this? For what it's worth, and I cannot believe I'm saying this given how much I hated that tweet in the time and still do not care for the methodology, it made perfect sense to me in the moment that Imogen would do everything she could not to give in to her powers with Otohan was encouraging her to do so - a character built around the concept of this control against her powers absolutely would hold out - but it does feel like she should have learned something from it. And especially now with the circlet, with an undercurrent that she is starting to loosen that control, those little things - especially being too careful in combat, or indecision about the Vanguard (though that's been improving) are feeling incongruent.

Arlo this past Candela episode was fantastic. The only reason she didn't run away with the show entirely was how much others brought to the table, and I get this might be because it was the final episode of a series, in a system that is designed to bring failure to the forefront, but she went hard, nearly to the point of sacrificing herself, and it paid off in the story. And Laura recognized this very much in the panel, and I love what she said about it. I would love to see that level of intensity for Imogen, because, to be honest, for her specifically, the stakes are Candela-level high in Campaign 3.

[lilbagdermole]

Toph's Characterization, ATLA Comics - A Dissertation

Chapter Two - The Rift (Part Two)

You can read Chapter One of this dissertation here.

Before we start this Chapter. I would like to preface this - I am not defending nor supporting Lao and Poppy's neglect and emotional abuse towards Toph throughout her childhood. I believe that Toph's trauma should have been delved into and explored in a more serious manner (and not utilized as a mere fuel to an mediocre conflict between her and Aang). With that in mind, let's begin.

Part Two of 'The Rift' comic picks up where we left off - Toph reuniting with Lao. Now, I ask you, how do you predict Toph's father would react upon confronting his daughter for the first since she left to aid Aang and the other's during the war?

Before I reveal the canonical encounter, let me just present a couple of facts about Lao and Toph's relationship (exposed to us in the animated series):

Lao loved his daughter greatly - so much so that he sheltered her all her life due to her disability. Though he was emotionally neglectful, he believed what he was doing was in Toph's best interests and to protect her form the harms of their world;

Lao never denounced nor did he ever disapprove of Toph's ability to Earthbend. He even hired an Earthbending Master to teach Toph the basics; He even mourns the fact that, in his belief, she would be unable to become a master because of her disability (which obviously isn't true);

Lao: I'm pleased to hear that Toph's private lessons are going well. But I want to be sure she's not trying anything too dangerous.

(...)

Lao: Yes, and sadly, because of her blindness, I don't think she will ever become a true master.

Even after seeing Toph decimate her captors after being kidnapped, Lao didn't look repulsed nor disagreeable. He was concerned and ultimately his over-protectiveness led to Toph fleeing her home and returning to Aang. But he never scrutinized her bending capabilities.

Lao: Of course it doesn't change the way I feel about you, Toph. It's made me realize something.

Toph: It has?

Lao: Yes. I've let you had far too much freedom. From now on you'll be cared for and guarded twenty-four hours a day.

I am not, in any means, shape or form excusing Lao and Poppy's treatment of Toph nor am I sympathizing with their desire for Toph to present herself as some dainty, helpless and vulnerable little girl. They failed to understand her. But it's clear that what they did come from a place of concern and love - they associated blindness with weakness and wanted to do everything to protect their only child.

They never blamed Toph for disappearing with Aang. In their perspective, Aang had kidnapped Toph and they were merely trying to "save" her and return her back to her home. Because everything they did fundamentally came down to their (flawed) love for Toph.

Now, after nearly two years apart... How do you believe Lao (an overprotective and caring father) would react to seeing Toph?

Huh. Well that's certainly not what I had anticipated.

I get what Bryke were trying to do - to emphasize Toph's new-found avoidance of her past - they want to hammer in the ideology that Lao was a dreadful man, vengeful to the point of refusing to acknowledge his own daughter after she fled her home to save the world.

But, it just doesn't seem like something that he would do. Do I believe he'd be disappointed and resentful? Yes, of course. But, he loved his daughter and he would not do this. Bryke pulled this to try and justify the horrendous and impromptu conflict between Aang and Toph (because let's be honest, had Lao not been portrayed like this, Toph wouldn't have any argument or any defense for her abrupt disrespect and harshness against Aang in later panels).

So after this happens - Lao flees the sight but Toph and Aang are insistent on talking to her father and someone responsible for the refinery, respectively. This culminates in a battle with the Rough Rhinos - guards of the refinery.

One Rough Rhino tries to slash Toph (something that could have been lethal or, at the very least, would have harmed and hurt Toph) and she defends herself. Aang ends up saving the man and scolding Toph for potentially hurting him.

"We do just enough to stop them, nothing more! He could've been hurt-"

"We do just enough to stop them, nothing more! He could've been hurt-"

"We do just enough to stop them, nothing more! He could've been hurt-"

I hope we're all familiar with the Aang kill counter meme, if you aren't, please do yourself a favor and go search it up to better understand the absolute absurdity this phrase is coming from Aang.

And even if Aang had never once hurt a single person whilst surviving through a war and defending himself against countless threats that wanted to incinerate him, take him captive or imprison him, I just can't get past the idea that Aang would care this little about one of his best friends getting harmed (or worse) and scolding her for protecting herself.

Toph could have been seriously maimed by the Rough Rhino, yet Aang preferred to gently secure him on the ground and give him an opportunity to attack them both, than opting to jump in and assist Toph - he is quite literally staring at Toph being attacked and does nothing until she defends herself.

And instead of questioning how Toph is, ask if she is harmed or even helping the other's that are fighting on their own against the Rough Rhinos... we get this exchange:

More Toph and Aang contrived conflict to fuel a forced narrative that made no sense to begin with.

It's as though Bryke made it their life mission to make all their characters OOC in any and all projects regarding the ATLA cast. And it's also hysterical that, despite Toph doing something that Aang has done immeasurable times before, they are painting Aang to be a wise, all-knowing, good being whilst Toph is continuously painted in a very antagonistic light (even though, considering the circumstances, she had every right to defend herself AND be mad at Aang).

This just doesn't feel like them. It feels as though we're observing two different characters and not the ones we were introduced to in the animated series.

On that note.

Remember when Toph said this in the episode "Bitter Work":

Toph: No. That's the problem. You've got to stop thinking like an airbender. There's no different angle, no clever solution, no trickety-trick that's going to move that rock. You've got to face it head on. 

(...)

Toph: If you have the attitude of an earthbender, you'll stay in your stance and stop the rock.

Toph taught Aang to face his problems head on instead of fleeing them as he tended to do. It's that very principle that she deals with all her problems: when she's trapped in a metal box and invents metalbending; when she writes her mother a letter despite knowing that her parents were most likely displeased with her actions; when she's the only member of the Gaang capable of standing up against Katara; when she fights against any and all opponents... She always fights head on, never runs away from her problems.

She's just as stubborn as her element, after all.

Running away from her problems isn't Toph. It's never been Toph.

Until now, apparently.

Well, according to Bryke, Toph now avoids her problems the moment someone disagrees with her.

And just as I touched upon during Part One of this analysis - Toph just continues to disrespect Aang's culture, beliefs and traditions in favor of her newly acquired character traits: future apologist and Satoru defender. I've cut the other comments she makes through out this issue but, I can guarantee you that they're just as insensitive and OOC as the one I just displayed.

It's impressive how much Bryke are capable of butchering fan-favorite characters... Like, this is not Toph. It's looks like her but personality wise, this is a watered-down, stereotypical and the fanon portrayal of Toph. She lacks any of her previous sensitivity and endurance; her vulnerable and emotional side is no where to be seen (besides her moments with her father); she lacks the understanding and compassion that she once held for her friends.

She's no longer a dynamic, three-dimensional character. She's a hollow shell of herself reduced to a snarky, badass earthbender with daddy issues.

Toph eventually meets up with her dad in private and Lao continues to be just as OOC as previously.

And, we get this gem here:

I swear to all of you I am not a Lao apologist - but he would never say this. HE LOVES TOPH - he did everything he did because he loves her. And now he's belittling her, insulting her and down right orders her to obey him. This is not the same man that said that seeing Toph be who she is did nothing to affect his love for her. It's implied he even would have supported her becoming a Master Earthbender yet now disapproves of her choices.

This is just contrived nonsense to stir Toph's "arc" and give her opinion some valid groundwork. But, I just think we could have explored Toph's trauma and isolation as a child without making Lao hostile and malicious towards her.

It would have been so much more impactful and realistic to have Lao learn that, though he had good intentions, he failed to understand Toph and lost her because of his inability to relate to her; he failed as a Father and forged his bond with his daughter becomes he was too blind to see her for who she was.

It would have been so satisfying seeing Toph confront her father about her past emotions, trauma and her loneliness and watch him struggle to conform and accept the capable, independent and strong girl that his daughter had become. Seeing Lao dismantle his assumptions of Toph and acknowledging her feats, accomplishments and growth would have been so incredibly gratifying and it would have been a great way to tie up this plot.

But, instead, we got this: discord and angst for the sake of drama.

And I was about to consider this fanfiction level of characterization but that would be a disservice to all the fantastic and creative people who are capable of writing these characters in more compelling and honorable ways than their original creators.

Anyway, Katara, Toph and a bunch of other people get trapped underneath a collapsed, underground mine and this is how Aang reacts:

I get it. We got to push the K@t@nng agenda. But, Bryke, please. Toph is one of Aang's best friends; his only friend that's his age, his earth bending master and someone who he cares greatly about. And your telling me he only cares about Katara...

Whatever, you know what, we have to give prompts to Bryke - they consistently make Aang obsessive over Katara and, hey, atleast his indifference towards Toph and her well-being remains constant.

And if I have to read this, so do all of you:

Sweetie...

And we end this part here.

Thank you all for reading my thoughts and opinions! It means the world that I'm not alone in my hatred of Toph's portrayal in the comics!

[sparkles-rule-4eva]

Analyzing Sonic's love language + Sonamy, pt. 2

Read pt. 1 here

Last time we established that Sonic isn't the biggest fan of hugs. Now, we're moving on to analyze Sonic X and how this applies to Sonamy.

While I'm indeed a big Sonamy shipper, I agree that Sonic likely didn't have feelings for Amy in the first half of the show. I mean, his discomfort and "fear" of Amy's enthusiastic affections was basically a running gag for a while.

But like I talked about last time, Sonic just doesn't like hugs and physical affection in general. It's not just with Amy. Since he's not even that comfortable letting Tails hug him, of course he wouldn't be comfortable with Amy tackling him in hugs and kissing his face.

However, I do believe that the scene in the end of season 2 with the white rose and the reunion was indeed Sonic and Amy finally getting together. I've seen a lot of fans complain that the show writers couldn't make up their minds as to whether Sonic liked Amy or not, but actually, they were very consistent in writing their characterization. Come on, do you really think Sonic would suddenly become all sappy and lovey-dovey upon getting into a relationship. Probably not. Sonic doesn't change. He has a personality and preferences, and those aren't going to change in the context of a relationship. So while I do believe that they're in a relationship in season 3, I also think Sonic just wasn't nearly as invested in it as Amy was.

He would still get nervous and sometimes even still run away from her here and there. But this scene in particular is a nice difference form season 1. He'd just seen Amy running for him, and this was his initial reaction:

Yeah, he looks nervous, and he has his hands up as if to say "stop," but he's smiling. He's still happy to see her. Of course, Amy strangles him in a hug and while she goes on a tangent about loving their reunions after being apart, he goes like this:

But does that mean he doesn't like her? Not necessarily. Again, he's still himself. Sonic isn't a sappy and overly affectionate guy. That doesn't mean he doesn't care for someone. It just means he's a normal guy with preferences when it comes to affection, and gets uncomfortable when those are violated. Yeah, Amy's in the wrong for not respecting his personal space. But that makes her quieter moments of affection all the more amazing to Sonic. Remember the way he'd get genuinely flustered or taken aback whenever she'd do something more mildly affectionate, like make him a good-luck bracelet for the water, or dress up all fancy just for him? 💞

And while he doesn't like hugs, Sonic DOES get protective of Amy quite a bit throughout the show. In one scene he tells her to hold onto him (for safety), and proceeds to hold onto her as well.

This is seen even moreso in the series finale. He would often stand close to her and several times held her with both arms, and he would stand over her here and there as well.

When their home Planet Egg saves them from the creepy water mass, he willingly holds both of her hands in his as they're carried back out to safety.

And doesn't seem to mind one bit when she gently leans her head against him as they approach the Typhoon.

In conclusion, Sonic and Amy express love very differently. Amy prefers physical affection and sometimes gifts. If I had to guess, I'd say Sonic's love language is acts of service. Sonic's dislike of physical affection doesn't mean he doesn't like Amy. And seeing that the recent media has shown Amy to be much more mature and respectful of Sonic's personal space, I think they'd make a wonderful couple. 🩷💙

[columboscreens]

ive been rewatching columbo eps on prime video (idk where to get the other season after 7 :c) and i'm just done with A Case of Immunity, the one with the Suarian Kingdom and the whitest middle east guy i've ever seen ? And like. I'm not a fan of that episode, but. I feel like i'm missing a lot of political or historical context for that episode ? And I wanted to know if you knew more. Thank u, I'll get back to my little guy show now.

you're not missing much.

the latter portion of original columbo was marked by an increased desire to show him in radically different contexts--between a man on international waters, an arab diplomat, a IRA liason, a CIA agent, and a mexican matador, it suffices to say columbo got around a little more as time went on. and due to the growing US interest in the middle east throughout the 70s (most of europe's imperialist/colonialist tendrils had vacated, cold war alliances were being made, israel, oil, etc.) i suppose they thought people would want to see something topical. they also didn't want to piss anybody off, so the Very Real Country of Suari it was.

the role of hassan salah was originally intended for ben gazzara, but he was scrapped by the network for being too expensive (much to peter falk's consternation). mine too, really, because though hector elizondo did a fantastic job, i think gazzara would've played a better arab. he was sicillian, but i wouldn't be surprised if he had actual arab heritage, as sicilians very often do. his surname is arabic as hell--غزارة is arabic for "abundance", which ended up as a loanward in italian to mean "noisy".

ultimately though, the middle east is an ethnically and geographically diverse region containing a wide variety of looks and skin tones. for one, i and my entire family are lebanese. my skin is rather pale, my grandfather was tan but had pale blue eyes, my aunt is nearly blonde, etc. so elizondo's countenance may not scream "arab" nearly as much as gazzara's, but levant, maghreb, or gulf--he's not all that unbelievable either.

funnily enough, in middle ages arabia, those with blue eyes were associated with duplicitous and untrustworthy behavior....

i guess something that does kinda make me roll my eyes is the treatment of the language. to their credit, the characters do speak and write real arabic in the show, albeit...poorly. obviously it's a 70s tv movie, who cares about accurate glottal stops, but they spent like eight grand to rent a learjet for one of the scenes, and the arabic is real and (mostly) intelligible, so clearly somebody translated it. would it have killed them to hire a dialect coach?

we did get some extremely jewish-sounding arabic out of peter though. so. all is emphatically forgiven

the one thing that truly rubs me the wrong way about the episode is that it's noxiously sympathetic to the american political ethos of the time, which as we well know could do no wrong. watch columbo OWN this EVIL diplomat donned in traditional garb who wants to retain his country's DISGUSTING traditional ways while the new, hip young king who was probably forcefully instituted by american troops in a coup you'll never learn about is COOL and LOVES AMERICA and will lead his oil-filled country on camelback into a beautiful sunset of BEING COOL and LOVING AMERICA. there's NO WAY this could go south. STOP looking at iran NOW

(speaking of which, the state dept. rep who bursts columbo's bubble, kermit morgan, might or might not be a nod to kermit roosevelt jr. who played a central role in the CIA's ousting of iran's mosaddegh in 1953)

...least he's honest

anyway, in retrospect this episode isn't the series' finest moment, but it's a decent watch--and believe me, far and away not the worst treatment of arabs hollywood has thrown at us over the years. i know i'd certainly take a dozen of these over whatever the hell they were churning out post-9/11.

wallahi i could've forgiven the weird culturally inaccurate bowing if they just put columbo in a keffiyeh...

[kiss-my-freckle]

Full Episode Commentary

2x17: Know Thy Enemy

Elena lied to Jenna for nearly 2 seasons, pushed it to the extent that her relationship with Stefan took priority over Alaric's relationship with Jenna. It wasn't Damon who turned her into a liar. It was Stefan. Elena used to be honest, used to be real. Not the only thing Stefan did to her, but I'll cover this more when I get to 3x22. Right now, Jenna is learning about Isobel.

Elena's lies are the only difference between the first two seasons and the third. With Stefan, Elena is openly in love with him, but hiding his vampirism. With Damon, Elena is open about his vampirism, but hiding she's in love with him. It's best to watch Damon's journey with Katherine, especially in season 2 because Elena will repeat that same journey with Stefan in season 3. I'm talking about their back-to-back fall and un-fall. Damon's, then Elena's.

Why these brothers ever listen to Katherine is beyond me. She doesn't want them to tell Isobel she's there because she wants to keep her options open. She basically has two teams working separately, and for her benefit. If one screws up, she has the other.

Damon is left with the unfortunate task of telling Alaric that his dead wife is visiting his ex-girlfriend. Jenna meeting Isobel is pretty much like Liam meeting Damon. They're both supposed to be dead. I suppose someone in a dishonest ship would support a dishonest ship. To the extent they'd blame someone else than carry the blame themselves. Elena blames John for Isobel showing up at the house, and Jenna being pissed because both she and Alaric have been lying to her. Let's not carry the blame because we are liars, let's just blame John. I do like John getting punched, but he's being just as real as Damon. Had Alaric and Elena been honest from the beginning, they wouldn't be dealing with it now. It's not John, it's Alaric and Elena who are to blame for lying, period. Jenna shouldn't need to get the truth from John, her boyfriend and her niece should've had the respect to tell her themselves. Let's not coddle the 17 year old who's nearing adulthood. Like holy shit. Bonnie, Caroline, Jeremy, Matt, Jenna. Everyone pays for Elena's lies because only the truth can protect them. Jenna simply pays the most. I mean... Alaric and Elena might as well turn her into a vampire if they're gonna have her living in the dark. That's how real this is. And yes, I still blame Stefan because this is what he pulled Elena into. That's why I don't care that Elena lies to Stefan. Don't be mad at the liar when you're the one that created her.

Matt is still running around, pissed as hell because he just found out about vampires and knows that Vicki was bitten by one. I'm talking about their scene at the end of the pilot episode. From dishonest to dishonest. Damon was the one that made sure Vicki could utter "Vampire." He didn't want to lie and hide, so he bit her and left her uncompelled at the bonfire for the sake of truth. Now Stefan and Elena are supporting Caroline compelling Matt to forget. Yes, the liar and the liar he created are trying to get Caroline to continue lying because that totally helps. And fans believe Stelena is healthy. Uhm, what? For Matt to consider forgiving Damon for what he did to Vicki, Damon would first have to admit the truth as to why he turned her in the first place. I'm not talking about the bullshit lie he spits about turning her out of boredom. I'm talking about the real reason he turned her. Damon should have an open and honest discussion with Matt about Vicki's last days, about why he felt he did her a favor. I think the series covers something like 6 or 7 years. And in all that time, Damon turning Vicki only becomes an issue for Matt when he has to ring the bell to bring in Cade… oy. They literally wait 6 seasons for Damon and Matt to talk about Vicki, that's how ridiculous some of the writing is.

I love it when Elena stands up for herself, but girl has no sense whatsoever. It's like Stefan turned her into an idiot. I suppose she wants every vampire coming for her, and never mind what hell it would be for both brothers having to fight them all. Isobel offers her a safe home, and she's like… no, I'd rather put myself at risk in my own home. Only an idiot would completely ignore a good idea. Good thing Damon isn't Elena. He doesn't need to like someone to work with them. Katherine ripped his heart out, but he's still open-minded. Damon is the kind of person that would work with his worst enemy to protect someone he loves. Elena would ignore her worst enemy despite her worst enemy giving her great advice. She's foolish that way. However, I will say that Isobel was already compelled by Klaus. I say this because Elena didn't need Isobel to get her a home. She is perfectly safe in her own home. No vampires can get in without her say so, and a house is a house. It's my guesstimation that Isobel is trying to get Elena to Klaus before the ritual because that's what Klaus compelled her to do, but no big deal if she can't pull it off.

I really love what they do with Damon and Bonnie in these episodes. The secrets Damon keeps. He turns Bonnie into their secret weapon against Klaus. Think about that when you think about their love triangle.

Damon: Great. We'll have to put that on our list of things to do today. Harness ancient dead-witch power. Bonnie: You know where the witches were burned? Damon: Did I forget to mention that?

Damon knows where the witches died due to their order of events. When he woke up after his death, he watched them pull Katherine into Fell's Church and set it on fire. He then met up with Emily. She told him she was able to protect Katherine, and he was there to witness them kill her at the witch house.

Isobel and Katherine meet up. Like I said, I'm pretty sure Isobel is already under Klaus' compulsion, and Katherine has no idea. I consider Damon more intelligent than Katherine. People don't make deals with Klaus. They do for Klaus or they die. Why Katherine would believe Isobel capable of making a deal with Klaus is beyond me. She hasn't even been a vampire that long. I think Alaric said something like two years. I suppose they like their intelligent characters having duh moments. Isobel talks about Jenna the way Enzo talks about Stefan. "John told me Rick was dating auntie vanilla." The vanilla insult is hilarious because it really is an insult. Men like Stefan and women like Jenna are likely to lose their partners to affairs. I'm not saying that sex shouldn't be special. I'm saying that you don't have to be vanilla for it to be special.

"I was more than willing to play it their way if I had to, but they're floundering. Their witch has lost her powers, and they've used their only weapon to kill Elijah. If I stick with them, I'm dead. You showing up changes everything."

Katherine is such a sucker.

"Let me be honest with you. Don't mistake the fact that we haven't set you on fire in your sleep for trust."

lol… Katherine should've put her trust in Damon. The fact that they're all chilling in the family room with no fear should've been Katherine's biggest clue that they've got shit under control. Katherine is the one running around like a chicken with its head cut off. The fact that Elena has time to go to a fundraiser without fear of Klaus should've been another clue for Katherine that she's screwing up their perfectly good plan.

"Cause I tried to save her. Emily was just my key to getting Katherine back before I knew what a nasty little bitch Katherine was."

Damon likes to hide the truth of himself, the beuaty of his humanity. In his scene with Jeremy and Bonnie, is careful in how he words things. He wants to make sure Bonnie doesn't mistake who he's calling a bitch.

Witches aren't really cool with vampires because of what they are. They believe in balance. They don't even like Stefan, it's more like they tolerate him. They certainly don't like Damon in their house lol. A lot of this stuff repeats in the third season as they prepare Elena to become a vampire. The moonstone, the soap dish, the witch house.

Klaus is torturing the hell out of Isobel. You can see it written all over her face. She knows she's putting the pieces together for her own daughter's sacrifice, and she can't stop it. Had she turned to Damon, he could've found her a loophole.

Isobel bites into John and uses him to distract Stefan. This is how Katherine takes over for Elena. "You've got some serious explaining to do to the Council about John being not so dead." Katherine was fine for a moment, but she outs herself when she acts like she's talking to Damon. She had no idea that he took over the council, he literally runs it because Carol put him in charge. So no, he doesn't need to explain anything.

Because of Caroline outing herself, Matt is so pissed that he attacks Liz. He wants to see how they covered up the death of his sister. Damon finds out that Katherine took the moonstone. A nice shirtless scene for him.

They pull their scene cuts between two betrayals... Katherine betraying Damon and Isobel betraying Katherine. Liz is using Matt to get information about the vampires. I love this scene of Bonnie and Jeremy… doing the leaves up like she and Luka did.

"I'm at your house, but we have to hurry. Damon knows your lodging tricks. It will take him all of 20 minutes to find out where you're staying."

Damon and Stefan are only worried because Elena is missing. This episode is their epic plan failure because of Katherine. Stefan repeats this mistake in 3x9.

"So maybe there's a part of me that's buried here, the - the human part. The part that I abandoned when I - when I chose to become a vampire."

I love this cemetery scene between Elena and Isobel. Heartbreaking, but beautiful. It's also a nice parallel for Damon.

"I'm done now."

"I'm done?"

Isobel went out the way she came in. Klaus compelled her to do it in front of Elena for dramatic impact. He wants her to know his power, his reach. Alaric and Isobel are Klaus' first two victims in Elena's life.

"I'm all alone. My mom doesn't care, my sister's dead, and all of my friends are liars, and you're a…"

Even Jeremy and Tyler have been lying to Matt. Bonnie and Elena are the reason I can't stand their season 2 plan. They're both planning to sacrifice themselves rather than coming up with something better together. Bonnie could've asked the witches about the elixir, but nope.

This is one of my favorite scenes of John, even though I think it's insane that he and Elena gloss over the fact that Klaus compelled Isobel. Isobel had less control than Stefan does when he rips into Elena.

"You screw up everything, John. Everything you touch just falls apart. But you're the only parent I have left… so maybe I can learn not to hate you."

John and Damon have this in common. Damon sabotages things. They do a lot of switching with these brothers. Like with these men witches. Had Damon spoke to Jonas, they would've had them on their side. Had Damon went to the fundraiser instead of Stefan, he would've talked Katherine out of betraying them.

"That literally makes Bonnie our secret weapon."

As I said before, beware the brother that creates secret weapons. Especially when we're talking about Damon hiding the good in himself. Human Damon is written alongside Ripper Stefan. That's how Damon's comment in 1x5 bleeds through season 3. "Now nothing can come between you and Elena. Except the truth."

Have this body language parallel.

Klaus took over Alaric's apartment and his body. He's getting in with the group to make sure they have nothing that can stop him. Elena's necklace ends up in Alaric's apartment because of Katherine. A good place for it because I consider Alaric a centerpiece in their love triangle. Both Damon and Stefan parallel him in their own ways. Damon parallels Alaric with Isobel, Stefan parallels Alaric with Jenna.

Eijah is still daggered in the Salvatore cellar. Proof that deals are made to be broken. When Damon gets the cure, Stefan has no reason to leave town. Because he chooses to leave anyway, Katherine's comment will become Stefan's truth. "That right there was the biggest mistake you've ever made."

[i-have-a-wonky-eye-too]

Always Meant To Be... Part 15

Ransom Drysdale x reader series

<Part 14<

Warnings: mention of blood, illusion to death, soft!Ransom, crying!Ransom, hurt reader

You found yourself hidden away at your own party, outside behind the biggest tree you could find. As much as you loved Harlan, you really wished he hadn't thrown a going away party for you. One that consisted of the Thornby-Drysdale family, some friends from college that did nothing but drool over Ransom and not your parents. 'We'll be on our way to Barcelona, sweetie.' You didn't care. You just wanted to be in France already.

"I can't believe you left me in there with those vultures." Ransom huffed as he walked up to you, two glasses of some form of alcohol in his hands.

You smiled to yourself. "Sorry. What's your Uncle saying now?"

He shook his head. "For once I don't mean my asshole family." When you raised your eyebrow at him confused he chuckled. "Your friends." He said handing you a glass.

"Oh," You let out a soft giggle, "Sorry... It's your own fault for being so damn hot, Hugh."

Ransom grinned at you and leaned closer. "I love it when you call me, Hugh." He placed his free hand on your hip as he leaned against the tree.

You lowered your face as you blushed.

Ransom smiled and reached up to brushed some of your fallen hair back from your eyes. "I'm gonna miss you, pretty girl." He whispered making you gulp.

You nodded. "I know... I'll miss you too."

"So don't go." Ransom said. "Stay here with me." He begged making you smile.

"I thought you said I had to go the other day?" You asked looking up at him with a playful smile.

Ransom's smile stretched. "I did... But I changed my mind..." He began smirking, "Your fault."

Your brow furrowed, "How on earth is it my fault?"

"You finally sucked my cock and mad eme realise what I've been missing out on all these years." He winked at you teasingly making you blush.

"Staaaawp," You whined, pushing on his chest lightly feeling your face redden. "You said it wouldn't change anything between us."

Ransom chuckled and reached up to pinch your chin in between his thumb and index finger. "I'm teasing, beautiful... Although, I'll certainly going to struggle finding a girl to suck my cock as good as you." He winked again.

You groaned dropping your head against his chest as he chuckled. "I hate you." You giggled.

Ransom wrapped his free arm around you and rested his chin on top of your head. "You love me, beautiful."

You smiled as you hugged him back. "Yes, I do... But you love me too, Hugh."

Ransom sighed heavily. "Yeah... I do."

Ransom's smile fell as he felt you go limp in his arms, "Hey, what's-" His face paled as he looked down at your beautiful face, covered in blood. "Y/N?" He cupped your face as your eyes rolled back, "Open your eyes for me, beautiful."

Blood poured out of your eyes and mouth as Ransom dropped to floor holding.

"Please! Y/N, open your eyes!"

Your mouth fell open as blood continued to pour out until-

"Ran!"

Ransom jolted in his sleep, sitting up from his uncomfortable position in the hospital chair that sat beside your bed. He let out a pained groan as he stood from the chair and stretched, regretting falling asleep in the damn thing. He turned to look at your sleeping form and felt a lump form in his throat.

He nearly lost you tonight and he felt like his whole world was dying. He felt like he was dying when he sat beside you in the ambulance, the world a blur as he just stared at your face.

Ransom's head snapped towards you as he heard you quietly mumble something. "Y/N?" He bent over you, taking your hand closest to him in his and placed his other hand on the top of your head. "Beautiful?" He whispered feeling tears brim his eyes.

Slowly your eyes began to flicker as you opened your mouth, "Ran?" You croaked finally opening your eyes to look at him.

"I'm here, beautiful." He sniffled smiling down at you. "I'm here." He pressed a kiss to your forehead. "I thought I lost you."

"How are we doing in here?" Your doctor walked into the room smiling as he held your chart. "You gave us quite the fright, Miss Y/L/N."

You frowned a little at him. "M'sorry... Who, are you?" You asked.

"Oh, my apologies..." He smiled and stood beside you. "I'm, Doctor Kemp, I've been looking after you."

You nodded and looked at Ransom as you squeezed his hand.

Ransom glared at the other man, not liking the way he was looking at you. "Is she going to be okay, Doc?"

Doctor Kemp nodded. "There's one or two tests we need to run now she's awake but other than that horrible bruising on your otherwise beautiful neck... everything looks good." He smiled down at you.

Ransom's glare deepened. "Then I can take her home?"

Doctor Kemp looked up at him and nodded. "Yes."

"Good." Ransom looked back at you and smiled. "I'm never letting you outta my sight."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once you had the all clear, Ransom took you back home to his so the two of you could hide away from the outside world.

Harlan was dealing with your father and the police with Andy's help on behalf of you whilst you recovered.

"Hey," Ransom stood behind you in the bathroom doorway as you stared at your naked reflection, counting the number of bruises that littered your skin. "You good?"

You nodded after a while, still staring at the hand print around your neck. "He's not my father." You whispered.

Ransom's brow furrowed, "What?"

You gulped and looked at him in the mirror. "When he was on top of me," You touched your neck lightly, "He said... I should never have taken you and that bitch in." You said shaking your head. "That bastard, isn't my father and still, put me through all of this bullshit!"

Ransom walked up behind you and wrapped his arms around you. "Shh, it's okay. I've got you." He soothed you as you cried. "He's gonna get what he deserves, Y/N. They all will. I'll make sure of it." He kissed your cheek. "C'mon, let's get you to bed. You need rest." He guided you to his big bed and helped you settle in before he stripped down to his briefs and slipped in beside you.

Ransom stayed awake that night as he listened to your breathing. He was too scared to sleep, worried you might never wake up. He couldn't lose you. It would kill him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tags: @hawkeyes-queen @boringandbored @lewisroscoelove @fangirlfree @am-i-rite

@calimoi @wintasssoldier @gh0stgurl @chrisevanseagletattoo @hcaldwell016 @coffeebooksandfandom

[mermaidsirennikita]

What’s your opinion on the kind of pop, anachronistic period drama trend?

It’s obviously not new (e.g. Coppola’s Marie Antoinette), but I feel like, post Bridgerton, nearly every new period or costume drama series has a contemporary soundtrack and heavy-handed anachronisms (dialogue, behavior, etc.).

In the past few months, there’s been The Buccaneers and My Lady Jane, with uber spunky, plucky heroines and imo both shows feel so dated and banal now, very 2010s feminism. Like I can’t believe Apple TV adapted Edith Wharton and had her characters twerking at a ball?

I do like it in some cases—The Great works for me in a way My Lady Jane hasn’t, despite both being comedies. And I do like that all the aforementioned shows have done diverse casting. I like that The Great does “color-blind” casting like in theater; I appreciate Bridgerton’s “post-racism” alt-history approach much less. Weirdly, The Buccaneers kind of straddles both, acknowledging race and racism but also not making a big deal of it—why mention it at all then?

I’d love to see a Joe Wright-esque period drama with actors of color and some thoughtful anachronisms (like how Elizabeth wears her hair down), but an original score instead of Olivia Rodrigo. I guess there’s Sandition and Tom Jones, but PBS is so low budget compared to the streamers.

I love it! The majority of the shows (and movies) that have done it I enjoy. Honestly, I wouldn't say that the current trend has much to do with Sofia's Marie Antoinette because it's been so long and because, while I enjoy that movie for what it is, it is very... aesthetic without a lot of interest in the characters and personality. Sofia had very little to say, besides "Marie Antoinette normal teenage girl hence the contemporary references" which even back then was little... Yeah girl. We know?

Whereas I feel these works are often very heavy on referential dialogue, wacky characters, etc.

You could say that something like The Tudors is influential because it presented itself as very modern in its marketing, it didn't truly care about *looking* period (I'd say that My Lady Jane looks more period out of context at points)... But it didn't actively say "I don't give a fuck, we are consciously folding the 21st century in". Which is what makes things different now.

Honestly, to me the clear predecessor to the big trend now is Reign. And I'm not saying that's because the show was this massive hit (it wasn't lol), obviously. But you don't have to be a massive hit to forecast a trend. You just have to be seen by the right people, who may not even like your show! They just like your concept enough to pick from it. Reign incorporated the instrumental covers of modern songs first, Reign didn't give a fuck about period-accurate costumes at ALL (and often compensated by pulling from designers like Alexander McQueen), Reign snarked about history while gleefully doing its own thing.

I disagree with you quite a bit on My Lady Jane. I don't personally find the feminism of the show very OTT--while Jane wants to be an independent and free spirit and not get confined to a specific role, that's really pretty typical for young historical and fantasy heroines. She has to have SOMETHING to fight against. The show has zero issue with creating female characters who are pretty fucked and dimensional, which I think is one of the first signs that a series isn't straw feminist. Mary is a fucking LUNATIC and a horrible person, and though the show makes it clear that most of this really is because of the abuse she suffered at her father's hands, it doesn't excuse her behavior. Jane's mom is delightfully self-centered and avaricious... and she also cares for her daughters, though she's still happy to sacrifice them. And she gets a fun little... semi-romance? He's in love and she likes to fuck, I guess? ADORED her, and it's a really unique role for a middle-aged female character. This is also really the show I've seen present Elizabeth I in the least YOU GO GIRL kind of way. She hasn't had a ton of limelight just yet, but as of now she's kind of... just a girl.

The Buccaneers is very boring and largely about female suffering in the guise of feminism, but I find it sits more on the Bridgerton end of things, in which it dips its toes in anachronism (heavily) without wanting to really get into the fun of it. It's a hook, but it's not something the show really has a lot of wholehearted joy in it, which I found Reign did, as well as The Great, and to a much lesser extent The Serpent Queen. Plus something like Rosaline, a movie that really gets overlooked but has a lot, tonally, in common with My Lady Jane (if not in terms of fantasy).

To me, I like the full-hearted, balls to the wall swing nine times out of ten. I want the contemporary music, and a lot of the time, I'd prefer it to be the actual track itself versus a strings version at this point. I want the snark, I want the asides, I want the good time. The Great has PROBABLY done it best for me at this point. And I will say, to me the music is a big part of it? So an original score without any more modern music wouldn't work for me here. I also don't really need it to be a Joe Wright-esque vibe; if I want that vibe, I would often prefer full sweeping romance.

[senseofnewness]

Just finished part 3 and can’t stop thinking about it. Honestly:

I truly don’t think reader can go soo long and not catch an ounce of feeling for Art. I think they both liked each just not nearly as much as they craved Patrick/Tashi. The whole [Art] not kissing her on the cheek and her noticing it and Art knowing that he’s with reader and still being head over heels for Tashi because she’s just something he cannot have. I’m not sure if I missed something, but in my head Art and Tashi had never gotten sexual because he’s ALWAYS went back to reader for his needs (plus Tashi did say it was nothing - and I would take her for a liar either.) Art is guilty of infidelity, mainly mental and reader is just fuckin’ psychotic. Art’s jealousy came out a bit more this chapter and I loved it. I loved seeing Patrick being open about his sexuality and basically admitting his crush on Art. They’re truly inseparable. I wish we could’ve seen more of Art and reader’s vulnerable side like in their argument where they both spat truths at each other. I had absolutely NO clue reader was walking around with battle scars on display for him to see. I completely understand her obsession with Patrick and him accidentally falling in love with her. It may be genuine on his end but it obviously isn’t on hers considering she has an un(healthy) obsession with him. If you ever plan on finishing this series, or if you ever wanted to just answer some questions - I have a few :)

- What does the future look like for Patrick and Art’s relationship considering Pat’s in love with Art and Art is oblivious (to everything/everyone it seems… but not really.)

- Will Patrick ever find out the reader is a freak or do we lock that in the chamber in live happily ever after?

- Once/If Patrick and reader do get together, will we get to hear Tashi and Art’s thoughts?

This is super long, sorry! Also, I read you saying reader was trying to convince herself that her and Patrick were much happier than Art/Tashi - can you elaborate or is that too much to speak on in honor of a potential part 3? 👀 The people wanna know…

wow that's a long message, almost as long as part 2

Oh I think she cares SO MUCH about Art especially the fact that he "doesn't" care (that's what she thinks), she cares.

Yes I can confirm it, Art and Tashi never cheated. They're the closest friends but nothing more. But they like each others but will never say it because Reader is there. Tashi thinks of Reader as a loving and adorable girlfriend and thinks it would be terrible to break her heart. Art, he thinks like Tashi thinks.

It was essential for me to keep Patrick queer and in love with Art because it would explain his attitude with Reader.

I didn't think Art was ready to talk back to Reader yet but who knows IF THERE IS A PART 3

Reader just didn't give a fuck anymore about hiding her relationship with Patrick to Art. Hell, she wanted him to see and leave her ass so she wouldn't have to break up with him herself. I don't know if you noticed but how easier it would have been for her to say "let's break up" WEEKS ago. She just couldn't because that would make her the bad girl of the story. She's obsessed with being the victim.

Patrick never had someone who is so attentive to him. (I imagine him to be a middle child) He couldn't help but fall in love with someone who took such a good care of him and believed in him. It is genuine on his hands but it is not healthy either. Patrick is more than once on the edge of verbal abuse. He has issues.

Okay, let's go with the questions.

What it looks like? I truly have no idea. I really want them to make up and be besties because they are so cute. Maybe once Art finally starts dating Tashi? Once they both get what they "want", they would be like "look, it's done now, let's just make up" but that would be too easy. I think the resentment would mainly be on Art's side because Patrick was sneaky and hiding stuff from him. While Patrick would always be welcoming Art with open arms. As for Patrick's feelings for him, I'm scared they would always be unreciprocated. To me, Art is way too comfortable living the hetero lifestyle.

Oh god, Patrick would find out Reader is a freak eventually but sometimes think it's endearing because she loves him so much. But I'm not sure he would find out EVERYTHING because now that she has Patrick, she has no reason to be as freaky. Maybe until she gets a new obsession but ........

In my mind, they do get together because it's too far gone anyway. As for Art's and Tashi's thoughts, we will only hear about those if they're willing to tell them to Reader's face. I expect Tashi to do so. As for Art, maybe in a desperate attempt when Reader decides to leave uni to be a full time tennis wife for a player who barely manages to feed himself.

As for my "potential part three", I didn't give it much thoughts. But one thing is sure, I want to get rid of the university setting. So I thought Reader being pregnant would be the best way to.

But we can simply do a time jump but I hardly imagine Reader having a career that is so not taking care of Patrick 24/7. And since she sucks at tennis, she wouldn't be a coach, so once again the idea that she's a stay at home mom came.

But she's not fulfilled, she got Patrick, she wanted him for years but now she's a shell of herself. She does not desire anything anymore. Plus, their relationship isn't the greatest. They have great sexual chemistry but communicating is complicated since they can't mention anything about the beginning of their relationship without Patrick hating himself. Maybe he also cheats on her while on tour because that's how he is. And she resents him because pregnancy ruined her body. But one thing motivates her when she hears that Art and Tashi got engaged : how she was RIGHT about them. And out of the goodness of her heart, Reader reaches out to Tashi and congratulate her because she's such a GROWN person and more mature and happier and fulfilled. Tashi just answers 'thanks' and oh she's pissed. And Reader is like "let's put everything in the past, look, i was your fiancé's girlfriend a lifetime ago, so long ago i almost forgot, now look how much better my life is without you two ahah". She's mentally deranged.

Thank you for your message ❤️

[the-badger-mole]

How do you feel about multishipping? There are people who ship both Kataang and Zutara or Zutara and Maiko. Do you think they can coexist?

I absolutely believe shippers can coexist. This is shipping of fictional characters. It shouldn't have any bearing IRL. If someone disagrees with me, that's fine. I don't care much about the opinions of other shippers unless they're particularly rude. Then that's just about the people coming at me out of pocket rather than what they ship. I have close friends who ship things I don't (yes, even in this fandom- although all the Kataang shippers I know are very casual fans), and we still love each other. Because we don't judge each other on our opinions of fictional characters.

EYE don't multi ship in this fandom because I hate Aang and Mai. I do not like them as characters. I hate their endgame ships, yes, but mostly I hate them. If I didn't hate them, then the ending of the series would've still been disappointing, but those ships wouldn't bother me nearly as much.

....

...well, okay, I guess it's not entirely true that I don't multiship in this fandom. I think Yukka is cute, but I don't endgame ship them. Yue and Sokka are childhood sweethearts that split amicably when life takes them in different directions. Sukka has my heart.

[redheadgleek]

March Books

My parents were here for 10 days and we were doing work around my house, so I did not get as much time as I would have liked for reading. So I focused on some shorter books.

What I Read: 

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern. The latter half struggled a bit and lost a plot, but it was still good and the ending was lovely if a little wistful. I do feel like it's one that would benefit from a rereading, so I'm listening to it on audio. 

Rest Is Resistance: A Manifesto by Tricia Hersey. It's a short book. It could have been a New Yorker article and that would have been sufficient. One of the reviews suggested thinking of it as a sermon, which helps somewhat with the framing, but it still needed help.

The Proposal by Jasmine Guillory. The last 1/4 of the book infuriated me so much I nearly DNF, even though I had enjoyed the first 3/4. The MC completely and totally pushes on FC's established boundaries and then throws an absolute fit when she doesn't give into him.

Most Ardently by Gabe Cole Novoa. A sweet trans retelling of Pride and Prejudice. A few minor quibbles: the author aged Oliver/Elizabeth down to 17 which was not needed and was annoying and the setting was moved to London, which did not work with the scene where Oliver tramps across mud to take care of Jane. 

The Imposition of Unnecessary Obstacles by Malka Older. The second book of the Mossa and Pleiti murder mystery series that takes place on Jupiter. Overall, I enjoyed the story a lot; I have issues with "does she really like me or is she just spending time with me" internal diatribes with adults.

Romancing Mister Bridgerton by Julia Quinn. I've enjoyed the Netflix Bridgerton series as the smutty cotton candy that they are and the ebook was on sale. It was fluffy and light (and light on the smut too, hurumph) and I didn't appreciate that the plump herione slimmed down before she was attractive.

How the Word Is Passed: A Reckoning with the History of Slavery Across America by Clint Smith. Audiobook. He's a sociology professor and a poet, which made for a wonderful combination in this exploration of how slavery is written into our foundation and our current mindset. Excellent book.

At First Spite by Olivia Dade. The story was a touch unbelievable, but it's a romance so that's forgivable. There were some really lovely scenes in this book as the protagonist battles depression. The medical stuff was almost believable. But. I'm not sure if describing plump female characters as "lush" is any better than "voluptuous."

A Short Stay in Hell by Steven Peck. The author is LDS and I'm not sure that he really realized that his version of Hell (that we are all young and white and delightful and the same) is what the church has taught as what eternal life with God would be like and why I had nightmares at 12 about dying. 

The School of Essential Ingredients by Erica Bauermeister. Such beautiful prose. There were some descriptions that will linger with me for a long time, I think.

What I'm Reading:

Howl's Moving Castle by Dianna Wynne Jones. Audiobook. It's been more than 20 years since I last read these books, so it's been a treat. 

The Book That Wouldn't Burn by Mark Lawrence. I think I'd be a little more excited about it, if it felt like hadn't just finished a book with a similar sort of theme (Cloud Cuckoo Land).

Still making my way through A Short History of Nearly Everything. It was so engrossing in the first couple of chapters ...

What I'm Reading Next:

I'm in a middle of a reading lull right now. So many books to read and just having a hard time picking one.

[the-houseryn]

Review of my 2023 Writing

I don’t typically post about my fanfics, just reblogging posts made about them by fest mods and the spare reccer but I’ve decided I’d like to change that a bit. So my first attempt is going to be this summary of what I’ve done this year.

⊹

Stats

Word Count Posted: 144,496

Fic Count Posted: 7

Art Posted: 1 (First time)

Updated Series: 2

Fandoms/Ships: HP: 4 Dron, 2 Drarry, 1 Dron Friendship

Fests: @harrydracompreg, @unleashed-fest, @hp-soulmates, @hprarepairfest, and @pumpkinspiceficfest

⊹

Fics Posted

take me home, you're my, my, my, my... (Drarry, 157.4k, E)

Potter �� I have found myself in a position in which I am desperate for assistance. I know I have no right to reach out to you for help, but I know of no other option. Could you be amenable to meet up with me someplace private, can be of your choosing, to discuss this matter? Please. Draco Malfoy A Malfoy mystery. His favorite kind.

I’ve been writing this one since Nov 2021 and I unfortunately was only able to update one chapter on it all year long. I yearn for my muse for this fic to return to me so I can finish this bad boy off.

in a party bathroom (Drarry, 16.4k, M, HD Mpreg fest)

He hadn't even wanted to go to the ridiculous party, let alone planned on shagging Potter in a port-a-john while he was there. But he did, and oh, what fun the consequences it brought were...

This one has found itself on a few rec lists this year and I’m very pleased about that. Thank you to everyone who has enjoyed it and promoted it💖

boy, you might have me believing i don't always have to be alone (Dron Friendship, 102.1k, M)

Eighth year was not nearly as painful as he expected it to be. Honestly, Ron would be on cloud nine if only Harry would let them help him. But Harry kept insisting he was fine; his denial was so strong he didn't even see how bloody weird it was that he didn't care that Malfoy was acting weird. It only made sense then to Ron that with Harry not up for the task, it was on Ron's shoulders to watch and take care of the prat.

Started this in Nov 2022 and this year I did Chapters 9-18. This baby lives in my head allll the bloody time, if only that could then translate onto the keyboard with as much ease, then I could have it done already. This one isn’t all that popular, but I’ve got a small gathering of devotees, and that makes it so freaking special 🥰

unless you're choosing me (Dron, 31.4k, M, Soulmate Fest)

A soulmate was a choice. It was two people deciding to spend the rest of their lives together, weathering any storm. That was a fact that Ron would hold as truth for the rest of his life. Even when the Unspeakables found a spell in some ancient text that tied soulmates together with a red cord and showed them a moment of their "true love". It was a hoax, he was sure of it. But no one else agreed, willing to upend their lives just because a stupid spell said so. Ron wouldn't have minded so much if it hadn't wrecked his.

OMG, this fic. I was just freaking perusing the Soulmate Fest prompt list out of curiosity only, NO intention of participating since the due date was like in under two weeks. But then I saw this one prompt (Thank you Dr.P’s hubby) and I was struck dumb with an idea, then wrote the first 11.4k in 24hrs, breaking my record by an extra 2.5k. Honestly so fucking baffled by myself when 3k on a normal day is a stretch.

misty morning comes again (Dron, 4.4k, M, Unleashed Fest)

Every morning without snow on the ground or rain that turned the land into a slip and slide of mud and wet grass, Ron ran the property with his misfit herd of barnyard animals close behind him. The thrilling tease of watching Ron's solid, sweat-glistening body do its lap around the misty morning pond was just about the only thing that could get Draco willingly out of bed so soon after the summer sun rose. Barn chores and animal butts certainly weren't going to do it.

Hands Down My Favorite thing I’ve written this year. I give it a quick reread all the time. I normally don’t care too much about my stats. But I love this fic so bloody much that it bothers me a weeee bit that it’s my lowest hit fic. Only really cuz I get so much joy from it that I just wanna share that joy with others but it seems to have passed under people’s radar.

all of this silence and patience (Dron, 9.9k, M, Pumpkin Spice Fest)

Thanks to the lack of a natural baby boom after the war, The Post-War Reunification and Family Reformation Act of 2003 passed, damning Draco to a long, miserable life with Ronald Bloody Weasley. With nothing left to lose, they might as well try Luna's suggestion, even if the idea of snuggling Weasley sounded like a unique method of torture. Pumpkin Spice Fest Prompt: Morning Fog, Snuggles, and Marriage Law

This was the first fest I’ve ever done with a max word count and I honestly thought 10k was plenty for my idea with this prompt… I ended up having to cut three sections and hunt down every possible contraction I could create to make it three words shy of the max 😶

your seat, it's the best seat (Dron, 17.4k, E, Rare Pair Fest)

In the moment, it hadn’t occurred to him that taunting Draco into sitting on his lap once would open the door for Draco to keep doing so, even when other chairs existed. Nor had he known that the consequence of becoming Draco's furniture was how hard he'd fall in love with someone who didn't fancy him back.

I almost pitched this fic so many times. It was a fucking brawl to finish it. Thank you, Amia, for reading it over tho and hyping it up. I’m way more proud of it than I was then and I appreciate you convincing me to persevere 💖

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Art Posted

[ART] how the hell... (Drarry, G, Unleashed Fest)

Prompt: Harry has no idea how a white highland cow got inside 12 Grimmauld Place, nor why it seems to have a strange affinity for the fancy French chocolates one of his admirers keeps sending him...

Never have I thought I’d participate in a fest with my art, but here we are. I’m honestly quite proud of it…. As long as I don’t think about my struggles with perspective… but hey, my little dumb details like the scrub brushes in the sink and the post-it notes are my favorite things I’ve done. Also??? I’ve never drawn an animal before so I’m proud of that too tbh

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Overall Notes For The Year ✨

I cannot believe how many fests I participated in this year and how many I was so sad to not be able to do like Kinktober and Deflower December. But I’m so so thankful that I participated in the ones I did because it led me to fest servers where I really got a chance to alpha and beta for other writers. Not only did I get to talk to awesome people and make a friend, but these wonderful writers undid so much damage from some bad shit that happened to me in high school English classes. I have been denying myself becoming a professional editor despite my love of it for a decade but between my therapist’s support and these writers insisting I had talents as an editor, even requesting my little write-up about beefing up your writing in 2nd edits, I’m now ready to face those fears. It’s gonna be tough but I’m also so excited in a way I’ve never felt about life outside of writing fanfiction.

(Also, what the fuck is up with me having my word counts end in .4? I managed that in 5 out of 7 fics as well as my overall for the year??? Odd AF)

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2024 Goals

Right now, I have plans for participating in Knot, Dronarry, HD Mpreg, and Love of a Weasley fest with dreams of participating in SEVERAL others. I also HOPE with every fiber of my being that I finish ‘take me home...’ and part one of ‘boy, you might have me...’ in 2024. Got my fingers to fucking crossed for that 🤞🤞🤞

✨May we all have a year full of the planets called Free Time, Great Ideas, and Energy (and Skill for those like me who have skill loss when overwhelmed with life) being aligned so we can create all those wonderful fics floating in the universe, begging to be shared.✨