#I wonder how many people have blocked me at this point lmao

[bunnygirl678]

They are holding hands

The artists knew what they were doing

They are holding hands

[tangerine-brooks]

i hate it HATE IT so much when asoiaf fans go "grrm finish the fucking books already" and "lmao we'll never get twow" and "what if grrm dies and doesn't finish the story" and if i see this shit one more time i'll start biting people, because SHUT UP LET HIM COOK let him take his time!! this is so mean-spirited like here's the author that gave us so so many wonderful heartwrenshing captivating profoundly human stories but instead of being supportive and grateful you bitch and moan about how long it takes him to write more???

people on tumblr make such long post that analyze every word in these books, because literally every word is so thought-out it's either a foreshadowing or a subtle but real reflection of the pov character's constantly evolving inner life or has some otherwise deeper meaning to it; and the same thoughtfulness goes for every chapter, every plot point, every character interaction! and then the same people wonder why it takes grrm so long to write it?? seriously??

and if you ever attempted to write anything real and sincere you know that it doesn't come easy. and all the emotional complexity and depths that make characters feel so human and their struggles so real peaking at "ned loves my hair" and "i dreamed of you" and "he wondered what it's like to have a home" and every line that is so simple but so sharp and raw it makes me wanna pull my hair scream cry sob throw up - none of it comes easy!! it takes time and effort and emotional work to write like this! of course it takes long!

not to mention that grrm's in his seventies and likely has some health issues that take time and energy to manage and that he doesn't mention publically because why would he? ALSO when you get older you tend to get tired more easily! and need more time to rest! like, that's why people usually retire in their sixties. but grrm keeps working! ALSO have you never experienced a burn out or a creative block after years of working on the same thing??

ALSO one of asoiaf's main theme is that any person in any circumstances deserves empathy and understanding!!

so while we all are waiting for next books it's so important to show our amazing beloved author respect and support and gratitude! all say thank you, thank you george rr martin and please take care and take your time!!

[whenmemorydies]

Breakdown of a racist microaggression in Ice Chips 3x08

This title is misleading because any scene with Donna in it is likely going to be one gigantic macroaggression of some sort lol but I wanted to talk about this scene in Ice Chips and how subtly but impactfully it was played by all the actors in it:

Recall the beginning of 3x08 Ice Chips. Donna has just done her narcissistic thing in the parking lot of the hospital, ignoring-a-very-pregnant-and-about-to-give-birth Natalie's pleas to "shut the fuck up" and we are now in the hospital room with the two of them.

Donna is continuing to do her narcissistic thing and has begun to regale everyone in the room (which at this point is Natalie and a nurse) with stories about being a mother, asserting herself as an expert on the journey her daughter is about to embark on.

She tells Natalie and the nurse (who happens to be Black) about how badly she wanted to be a mother. She said its because:

I wanted someone to love me the way I had seen.

So yes, alarm bells. Wanting a baby so you can feel loved? Probably not the best reason to bring a whole other person into the world.

Note: Mikey entered the world with so much of Donna's expectations and trauma waiting to receive him like his first swaddle. No wonder he knew from a young age that pursuing a singular passion of his own was not going to happen for him because he had people to look after (recall his discussion with Tina in 3x06 Napkins). Parentified, eldest siblings unite /sob.

But back to Donna, Natalie, the nurse and the hospital room.

Donna then hits us with this curveball - her feelings about the exact parent/child relationships she had seen:

You know, all those smug mothers down at the Jewel, blocking the aisle with their strollers.

Yikes.

Donna is jealous of those mothers. She wants to be one of them. She wants to block the aisle at the Jewel (which a quick google tells me is probably short for Jewel-Osco - a chain of grocery stores in Chicago). She's so resentful of mothers with children, that she calls them "smug" for no other reason than they're probably not yelling at their kids in public (lol, also more yikes). She wants to be smug too. It's almost like Donna doesn't want a child, but what she thinks a child will give her: love she clearly hasn't experienced either as a child herself or as an adult . And also the power to be smug and take her place at the Jewel. Its almost like, to Donna, a child is an object, a means to an end.

But we're not done.

Then Donna says:

Do you know what Gina said to me? Gina fucking said to me - she looked down at my stomach - she says to me,

'You know, Donna, there are lots of good Chinese babies, honey.'

And then Donna turns to the only racialised person in the room, the Black nurse and says:

I mean, can you imagine?

And to her credit, that nurse did not kiss her teeth (she has so much more patience and professionalism than me lmao) but I felt her reaction to my CORE:

The biting of tongue, the looking up for divine intervention to get the person speaking to shut the fuck up, the looking down and pursing of lips when you realise no such help is coming, lmao.

I felt that reaction because I have been in this situation so many times as a racialised person (specifically as a non-Black POC). What is the situation exactly? The situation is a white person making a racist comment or "joke" in front of BIPOC folks in order to feel validated in their racism. The situation is getting BIPOC folks to collude/cosign in racism by doing it in front of them and trying to get them in on the "joke" too. This nurse was not having any of it.

For folks who are unsure about what was racist about Donna's comment: the "Chinese babies" Donna is likely referring to are the wave of Asian-American adoptions (where largely white Americans adopted children from China, South Korea, Vietnam, Cambodia and other East Asian countries) that began during the Cold War. The racism is the exporting of Donna's previously discussed objectification of a child, to the East. If she can't make a baby to fill the emotional vortex of her heart, Donna can buy adopt a "Chinese" one (the use of "Chinese" to refer to a myriad of nations and people is also racist). To be clear: white people treating BIPOC folks as objects to fill their needs and not as humans deserving of dignity and respect, is racist.

And yes, this is Donna recounting what someone named Gina has said to her. Its not technically what Donna has said so she's innocent right? Wrong. Donna is recounting a racist incident in front of a BIPOC person whom she has no relationship with. She's not condemning the racism of her friend so for all we know, she may have the same views as Gina - that Asian babies are fine to be adopted if you're a white woman who's feeling very lonely and just wants a baby really badly. This is deeply uncomfortable. My skin was crawling during this scene.

Natalie, observant woman that she is, clocks the nurse's discomfort right away:

And then Donna says:

The joke was on her. God rest her soul. I was two months gone with Michael at the time.

So we know Donna is not condemning Gina for her racism. She's condemning Gina for assuming Donna couldn't get pregnant on her own. Great. So now we and the nurse have a better sense of Donna's position here (Natalie being Donna's daughter surely already knows her mother's position).

Understandably, the nurse does not take Donna's bait and does not affirm her statements. So Donna doubles down in her condemnation of Gina, trying to get the nurse to affirm her any way, any how.

Natalie can see where this may end up going (when JLC does that upside-down-smile-grimace, even I know this is about to get messy lmao) so, being the well-practised parentified daughter that she is, she intervenes:

Then Donna reassures Natalie and the nurse that she did call Pete and she did leave a message and that everything is good. Still Donna needs affirmation from the nurse (can we talk about white folks needing BIPOC folks, in particular Black women, to affirm and hold their feelings for them? Can we talk about the demands of emotional labour?) so she tries another tactic:

The nurse can see right through Donna's posturing:

But she remains respectful and professional, politely responding: Wow.

(which wasn't as sarcastic in the scene as it might read here lol)

Natalie, like the nurse, can also see that her mother is, in fact, on one:

When the nurse does not give Donna anything more than "wow", she gets visibly pissed off. She pulls a face like "That's it?! Wow? Don't you know how hard it is to walk while being in labour?!" JLC goes FULL upside-down-smile-grimace:

But before Donna can embarrass herself further, she gets interrupted.

By a visibly Asian nurse:

And proceeds to shut the fuck up:

The way I CACKLED at the end of this scene lol.

Anyway, I was rewatching this episode for another meta but as is often the case with this show, something else revealed itself in the rewatch, so here we are.

This scene in Ice Chips is literally only one minute long. But the subtleties of facial expression, the looks thrown, the silences, the script choices were *chef's kiss* for so accurately depicting a racist microaggression and the inherent narcissism of racism itself - above and beyond any other mental health diagnoses that Donna might have. This scene was a perfect example of someone having mental health issues and also doing tone-deaf and racist shit, and how blurry those things may appear when you watch them in action.

As humans, we can have multiple things be true of ourselves at the same time. Donna can be mentally unwell and can say and do racist things. Natalie can love Sydney - an unambigiously Black woman - like a sister and also love her unambiguously offensive (lol) mother Donna. Carmy can love his largely BIPOC staff but then treat them like cogs in a machine at work.

I'm not saying that humans contain multitudes, the end. If some of those multitudes are harmful to BIPOC folks or other groups that face systemic discrimination then it is imperative that we try to change the behaviours we have that are harmful. Donna has work to do, so does Carmy and so does Nat. But I'm also saying this shit is messy and its complex. I just thought I'd point out that 3x08 Ice Chips did a great job of showcasing a bit of that mess and a bit of that complexity.

[where-the-water-flows]

hey no wait. hang on, wait. wenjing is like, explicitly the secret sword, right, the one basically no one knew about, it's part of the reason the court is like 'mmk seems legit' when fang doubing is like ~I am totally for real his disciple~ because he knows about the sword at all

but li xiangyi/lianhua is clearly like. practiced at using the sword, which does not move like basically...any other weapon. that man has spent a fuck lot of time training to and straight up developing how to use a sword that is basically the most unswordlike sword to ever sword. that sword is like a slap bracelet with bladed edges that can also cut through....anything? nearly anything?? it does not move or react like your standard mostly rigid bar of folded metal sword, is the gist here.

which brings me to two, semi-related, points:

when saintess rocks up to steal di feisheng from the zombie cave and also is like 'I'm going to kill you uh actually lol nope fuck that I'm outtie peace bitches', is that literally the first time she's even got a hint that li xiangyi/lianhua has a sword that is basically nigh impossible to block because it can straight up bend around obstacles? (obstacles such as, say, anyone else's sword) if yes, no fucking wonder she's like mmmm I see no thank you I need to go wash my di feisheng's hair, so busy, catch you later because like. how the fuck do you even deal with that. a guy who should have been horribly and messily dead literally a decade ago rocks up and is like 'I lived bitch! also surprise, I have a sword made of glowing Go-Fuck-Yourself metal', like, I too would fucking split! you would only be able to find me by the cartoon dust cloud left in my wake. RIP to everyone else in the jianghu but saintess is making the objectively correct choice here, which is wild because, like. saintess.

how many people's last fucking moment was seeing throat cutter, probably glowing and covered in their blood? because like. Li xiangyi clearly used it! enough to be good at using it. enough to know that it glows blue when there's blood on it, even if he apparently was just like sometimes swords just glow for reasons I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. so. if no one outside of sigu sect high command knows that wenjing exists*, that means everyone else who ever saw that sword -- which there has to have been people, given that li xiangyi was out there uhhh using it -- those people who saw it presumably also uh. died. in a pretty confirmed kinda way. likely via....that sword. throat cutter** indeed

*and not even all of the inner sigu sect command folks knew about li xiangyi having it! they're pretty explicit that five people total know about the sword, which is the four court heads, and then presumably either qiao wanmian or xiao zijin, but not both of them (which, lmao, what the hell were sigu sect internal politics for real), and even that's if we assume shan gudao is not being included in the count because he's "dead"

**yes I know it's a reference to a friendship/relationship you'd cut your throat for per @murderedbyhomework's recent great meta, but also, like. it's still a cut throat, y'know? words can have multiple meanings, and also this is mostly a pun on the name. the rest of the post stands as is tho.

[thoseyoulove]

Reacting to The Vampire Lestat - Part V (with a bit of spoilers and maybe important quotes?)

Armand!

YAY!

Okay, what the hell is happening?

??????

Seriously, WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING?

Am I lost because I'm reading the Brazilian Portuguese version and maybe it's not properly translated?

*Downloads an English PDF copy* Yeah, this isn't much better and it looks like it was poorly transcript.

I'm still not sure I'm following...

Well

Whatever

I still like this anyway?

Also, I can see I'll have to read at least this book twice anyway. Maybe more or even the whole chronicles.

Because since Armand showed up I'm DEVOURING this and I can see myself maybe missing a few details... I'll need to read it slower and savor it in the future. I also assume that knowing more of the lore will give me perspective on a future read.

Armand is never boring.

Still my favorite character. :) Let's hope nothing ever ruins that. :) /hj

Not one Lesmand/Armandstat interaction is wasted tbh, I don't care if they're vibing or hating each other's guts, they're always A MOMENT™.

Let's hope nothing ever ruins that. :) /hj

They also have some pretty valid and intriguing conversations, really.

The impression I get is that they want to stay close, but deep down know it's better not to because they're so messed-up and would be even more messed-up as friends or else (and maybe it's the or at least one of the reasons why they attract each other?), but there's some frustration in that acknowledgement too. Like, doing something because you should is not the same as doing it because you want to and... Well.

I mean, there's more I could say, but this is the short version of how I generally feel about them lol.

Can't wait to see all of this on season 3.

Assad is right, I want Armand to be unhinged too. So glad we're on the same page about all thigs Armand ever and that the spirit of Armand posses Assad on a daily basis so he can play him 100% the way I imagine him. SMILING THROUGH IT ALL, CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS MY LIFE RN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm also ready for more Lestat (Armand's version) and finally some Armand (Lestat's version). Let the battle begin. I wonder who will be more insufferable.

Little bit of Armand's back story. :/ I wanna put him in a bubble.

I don't really think I'll be interested in Marius, tbh.

Anyway... He's not here yet.

Gabrielle jumps from roofs like Cat Woman and Armand quickly and silently vanishes from places like Batman. I hope we keep the Gotham-esque vibes of these scenes. I think it's super cool tbh.

I also love seeing Armand talking to people telepathically? Feels so much deeper and kind of poetic, idk. Not to mention is such a cool concept. I hope the show explores more of that.

Also, when he stops blocking his thoughts and let's someone peek at his thoughts it feels intimate? And not necessarily romantic or anything like that, but just like, "hey, this is a little piece of my soul, I'm sharing it with you". Or maybe I'm too romantic and trying to find the beauty in everything lol.

But then he finally speaks out loud and it feels deeper and more meaningful as well? I don't know. Maybe I'm becoming insane.

Lestat went like 3 pages without mentioning Armand's beauty. I'm proud of him.

Nevermind, now he is mentioning it 50 times per sentence. Even more than he did before. It's like he regretted it and it's making up for lost time lmao.

Some of the words Lestat has used to describe Armand so far: beautiful, sublime, ethereal, exquisite, perfect, soft, saint, angel (there's more, but it's been so many synonyms for beautiful I can't remember... still, you get the point). Not to mention comparing him to a Caravaggio and Da Vinci paintings.

I feel like he'll run out of words to describe him pretty soon.

I guess we all feel pretty (not) normal about Armand.

This is also ruining it for me, because if someone doesn't describe me as "irresistibly beautiful" then what is even the point, really...

And it's not like they're a couple or anything, SO??? STOP!!!

They're not lovers, they're not friends, they're not enemies, they're a fourth and more sinister thing that not even them can classify, let alone my mere mortal self.

Anyway, I hope Lestat will be even more annoying describing Louis. He set the bar too high now.

I wonder if Louis appears (for a significant amount of time) on this book.

I hope so, but I don't know.

"But I was so glad it was finished. So glad that we could go on. Yet I held to the bars for a long time just looking at the distant woods, and the dim glow far beyond that the city made upon the lowering clouds. And the grief I felt was not only for the loss of him, it was for Nicki, and for Paris, and for myself." This is sad...

"So let him be your patron saint if you need it" LMFAOOOOOO.

Is Gabrielle wrong, though?

NO, SHE ISN'T!

Just have fun with your immortality instead of going on an uncertain quest to find Marius? Stop being stupid???

You'll probably just find danger or disappointment. Or both.

LISTEN TO THE VOICE OF REASON, LESTAT!

"And the sense of grief came back to me, the realization that we were really going, that it was finished with Nicolas and finished with the Children of Darkness and their leader, and I wouldn't see Paris again, or anything familiar to me, for years and years. And for all my desire to be free, I wanted to weep." So, he finally starts making a life for himself away from his abusive family. Then, he is forcefully turned into a vampire, has to live this double life with mortals, without ever being able to be completely open, honest and have real, deep relationships with them. Later, he turns Gabrielle, Nicki, meets Armand and the other of his kind, but they're all so troubled or with completely different interests... And it's clear as a day that they can't stay together anymore, he's slowly coming to the realization he's losing everything and everyone he knows and will soon be alone again... I'm (not) fine.

Also, this is so BPD-coded of him. He's had these pretty sad and traumatic moments, but he never allowed himself to feel those emotions for too long, he always found stuff to distract himself with, tried to see the "the good side" of things, embrace them, be positive instead etc, but you can only ignore it so much until it becomes such a big problem you can't possibly avoid anymore. And then the emotion hits 9483958345x harder than it would have if you processed things properly and had better coping mechanisms. Like, I get him, but OMG. Get him some vampire therapist.

Btw, Armand feels pretty BPD-coded too.

I also heard somewhere that Armand is a Scorpio?

And Lestat is another BPD Scorpio...

That would explain A LOT actually lmao.

End of "The Vampire Armand" chapter and they're parting ways.

So I guess I'll just rot and die, then?

Or...

...Armand will return in the worst possible way lmao.

I tried to find a gif of 2x05 saying "everything is fine!" to represent how I'm feeling right now, but failed, so consider it done anyway. Everything is (not) fine!

[pedrospatch]

well.

i think i may have hit my breaking point with myself. dw, it's a good thing.

how many times can i allow myself to react to negativity? how many times can i make myself sick worrying about who likes me, who doesn't like me, what this person thinks of me, what that person thinks of me, who says what, who still holds any past mistakes over my head and won't let them go, who took something i said a certain way, who thinks i'm a pos, etc etc.

how many times can i make the same mistake of reacting over and over again when in the back of my mind, i know how i should properly handle shit?

i know better. i know that not everyone will not and does not like me. i know i cannot please everyone. i know things i say or do will not align with everyone's own beliefs. i know better than to keep worrying about relationships that are dead and buried, going over the "would've, could've should've" over and over again in my mind like it'll change something. i know better than to fight for the attention of people who do not give a flying fuck about me and then get all sad girl when, surprise surprise, they barely throw glances my way or only decide to pop in only when it's convenient for them. i know better than to put my time and my energy where it does not belong. lmao, and i wonder why i've been failing over and over to heal my relationship with this place and keep repeating the same patterns. 🙄

i don't always have to defend myself or my character. i don't always have to tell my side of the story. i don't always have to make sure things i have said or done aren't misinterpreted, because if that's what's gonna happen, that's what's gonna happen. i don't have to prove anything to anyone, at least not to anyone who isn't willing to reach out, privately, to have a conversation with me, versus sending me some not so nice anonymous messages, or talking about me behind my back.

i am not here to be a problem. i am here to write, to read, to support. from now on, any kind of negative anon messages well be blocked on sight. if anyone has any kind of issue with me, or with anything that i've said or done, or what have you, my private messages are open for discussion. otherwise, you can continue to have a problem with me, and your choice not to try and resolve it isn't my responsibility.

sincerely,

a very, very tired vee

[selfdestructivecat]

I’ve seen quite a few posts in response to Thomas’ recent video, specifically his year in review. In this video, he discusses the setbacks he’s faced the past few years — such as the quarantine, Joan’s departure, and his own personal doubts and insecurities — and how they impacted the production of Sanders Sides.

And I truly sympathize with him. No, seriously! It’s already difficult to create something this big almost entirely on your own, but I’m sure this year only made things even more difficult. I know I’ve definitely felt insecure to the point of feeling sick when it came to things I created, so I can empathize with the enormous amount pressure he must be feeling.

However, many posts I’ve seen following this video are saying things along the lines of “If people still criticize Thomas after this video, then I’m going to lose it” or “Not that people who criticize Thomas even care, but Thomas really struggled this year. I’m with him all the way!”, or even “I bet SaSi critics will still demand the finale even after this. I doubt they’ll even watch the video!”

I want to clarify that this is obviously not everyone who doesn’t like ts criticism. People who block criticism blogs and/or the tag, who ignore criticism in general, or who feel upset when they see criticism of something they love: this is not about you. You are absolutely valid and entitled to feeling the way you do, and I hope you have a lovely day. Feel free to block me if that would be good for your mental health. Please take care of yourself. /gen

But to those vocally condemning ts critics, I want to make several things clear.

First of all, you are lumping everyone who criticizes the show in with people who demand the finale with no regard for Thomas’ well-being, for the well-being of his crew, and for basic common sense. While many people are upset that the finale isn’t out yet, we aren’t specifically mad that we don’t have a completed video to watch; rather, we are frustrated with what this says about the SaSi crew, their work ethic, and how they treat fans of the show.

We aren’t upset that we can’t watch the finale right now. We are upset that we’ve gotten very few updates about the show during this period between canon episodes. This video provided wonderful insight into why the finale has been delayed, and we would have loved something like this years ago. Obviously it didn’t have to be a 20 minute video, but maybe a Twitter thread? Something small that made us feel heard?

Hell, even announcing an official hiatus would have satisfied the vast majority of critics (myself included), instead of throwing SaSi into this limbo of “Oh it’s going to be finished this year, we promise- oh whoops, never mind! Next year for sure!” It’s been a constant chain of broken promises, and we were more than happy to give the crew some grace the first few times, but after a while, a repeated mistake becomes a pattern. And this pattern is not pretty.

We are upset that the crew seems incredibly disorganized (going back to the lack of updates, and of course taking into account how we haven’t gotten even a single part of the finale in five years), which could affect the quality of this series we all love so dearly. beauty-and-passion has spoken about this a lot (and is a lot more eloquent than me lmao, please go check out their stuff!) The most recent Christmas video seems to demonstrate that the series may be on the right track, and I will admit I was wrong in regards to this video, but the Inside Out video is a mess in so many ways. Even if this doesn’t prove a decline in quality, it certainly indicates a lack of consistency, which can be just as damning for a series.

We are upset that, while SaSi is in this limbo, Thomas seems to have been focusing on his other projects without telling us about this change in priority. He is welcome to pursue other projects, obviously. I’m thrilled that he is having fun with Roleslaying with Roman and My Roommate is Hades. But these new projects have come at the cost of Sanders Sides content, which also points towards a lack of organization. Some clarity towards which projects Thomas chooses to focus on would have been wonderful and greatly appreciated, so that we know not to expect something we won’t receive. And hey, maybe if we knew not to expect SaSi content until much later, maybe we wouldn’t have been constantly asking why we weren’t receiving SaSi content?

(And this is not an excuse for aggressively demanding content, obviously. But I feel like people who are confused and frustrated at not receiving something promised to them are justified in these feelings.)

And maybe we’re jumping to conclusions in many regards. I won’t pretend that we are prophets who can peer into Thomas’ mind and know what he’s thinking and feeling at all times. But it’s pretty damn difficult to say that NONE of the above could suggest that Sanders Sides isn’t held in the same regard as it once was. Hell, Thomas even admits in the video that he doesn’t feel as connected with these characters as he once did.

Second, many people attacking critics are also quick to drag their character. We are impatient, greedy, selfish, and cruel. We don’t care about Thomas; we only care about the end product! More Sanders Sides at any cost! We don’t like critical thinking, since we obviously didn’t watch the video; we only want to find mean things to say about Thomas and the show! We don’t like engaging in civil debate with our fellow Fanders who may disagree with our opinions; we only want to make other people feel bad, and to make others hate the show, too!

Well, guess what? You’re doing to us exactly what you think we’re doing to Thomas: you’re assuming the absolute worst of us and looking for any reason to drag us down.

We are critics. We analyze media (media that we love, mind you) and we acknowledge that it isn’t perfect, that the creators aren’t perfect, and we point it out. But we still love it anyway, because to truly love something is to love it with its flaws, to know that it could be better, to brainstorm how it could reach its true potential, and to keep doing so because you believe in this potential.

We aren’t trying to take away the joy you feel from Sanders Sides. So please don’t try to take away ours.

[h3smoremyselfthaniam]

"Agatha, is he with you?"

"Hello all, Miss. Galatea has set up a 'tumblr' for me. I wonder how many of you are out there" - Mr. Neville Linton

General info!:

Mr. Linton's full name is Neville Linton and his title is “The Groom”

His character day is the 14th of August.

He is a hunter.

If you remember his name being Thomas at one point, I changed it you aren't remembering wrong

Abilities/Backstory!:

(this character is still very bare bones but I wanna start the blog now because if I keep putting it off I’ll never do it. I’ll reblog this post again every time more lore/abilities/general info is added to it!)

[Backstory coming soon]

[More abilities coming soon]

Inconsolable sadness- The Groom will wail audibly and uncontrollably, calling out for his lover and his daughter, during matches, making it very easy for a survivor to tell when he is nearby. This makes him unable to rely on stealth, meaning that the hypothetical player would have to get creative when playing him.

Rules/Boundaries/Guidelines from the mod (can and probably will be updated):

1. as long as you're okay with them not being mentioned in his canon story, you can ship Nevi with other characters (OC or canon) if you want to, go wild.

2. The mod of this blog is 16-years-old, so don’t send NSFW things here, literally for your own sake lmao.

3. Feel free to send asks about crossovers, au’s, magic anons, pretty much anything that I haven’t explicitly said I don’t want.

4. Don’t follow me if you’re a TERF or exclude asexual and aromantic people from the community, I will find out and I will block you.

5. Mod is autistic and has very bad anxiety, sorry if I’m terrible at interacting with people especially at first </33.

6. Follows and likes will come from my main, @rain-candy-u

[tired-fandom-ndn]

Hi Error! I'm curious: is there any kind of ~proship content (a trope or kink or even specific phrasing or art style) that gets used a lot but that you aren't personally into, to the point where it ruins the stuff you do like? This is me with age gaps. So many wonderful kinks and fucked-up scenarios out there, but my libido just disappears if there's a huge age difference 😔. It's inconvenient! I'm just curious about others experiencing the same - do you try to read the stuff anyway? Do you do a lot of strategic filtering? Also, do you have any tips for gracefully saying "I am not into that, in fact it's a squick and I prefer not to talk about it, BUT I AM NOT MORALLY JUDGING YOU and I support your many ships that I cannot enjoy" to a new acquaintance? I swear this stuff was simpler 15 years ago.

PS: on consideration, my previous question - about proship stuff you dislike - might come across as being all TELL US YOUR TRIGGERS NOW, which is really not my intention. I'm just curious about how you deal with that kind of mismatch! Apologies if it came across weird; again, I think this fandom climate makes conversations super awkward.

No worries, I understand what you mean completely!

There's actually quite a few "proship"/problematic things that squick me out badly enough that I avoid them even when the rest of the work is completely up my alley. Most of them are even listed out on this blog (my pinned post links to a list of "hard limits") but the biggest one I can think of is any form of ageplay; age regression, diapers, CGL, etc. I absolutely will not engage with it at all no matter what and I use a lot of filtering (and sometimes the mute and block buttons) to avoid it.

There's other things I don't like and that may even turn my stomach a bit, but that I'll try (or skip over lmao) when the rest of the fic/game/etc is appealing enough for me. It just really comes down to how prominent it is and how rare the other kinks/tropes are; if it's something hard to find that I really love, I can tolerate most things lmao. I'll deal with tentacles if it comes with some good whump and mommy kink is tolerable if I like the ship enough, y'know?

In my experience, "that's not my particular cup of tea but I'm glad everyone is having fun" is usually a good way to say that you're not into something without offending someone. Though sometimes I still get people complaining in my inbox about me saying I don't like stuff, so I guess there's no pleasing everybody. It IS super awkward though; it feels like everyone is on edge and expecting an attack, so any indication of not liking a kink/ship/etc is interpreted as hate no matter how nice or polite it is.

[intern-seraph]

Hey, sorry if this is a weird question but. I was wondering if you knew of any blogs specifically for responding to/arguing against leftist antisemitism? I want to be a good ally to Jewish people, but also I Am Not Immune To Propaganda and sometimes I just don't quite notice the implications, you know?

There's been a few posts going around recently, where there's screenshots with the water filter, and someone responding to them like "yeah this is actually pretty fucked up for x and y reasons". Those have been really helpful because, while some of them are much more obviously antisemitic, some of them I'm not sure I would've noticed, and now I'm a bit better educated. That's the kind of thing I'm looking for.

Again, sorry if this is a weird question, and I hope you have a good day!

none that i'd recommend tbh? i feel like laser focusing on something can get to the point of seeing it everywhere, and there's also a risk of becoming reactionary abt it if that makes sense. the blogs i do rec are mainly other jews' blogs, especially the ones you've prob seen me rb from.

my main rec for recognizing leftist antisemitism is familiarizing yourself with antisemitic tropes. some of the most common ones you'll see:

Blood libel: Originated in medieval Christian Europe, spread throughout Afroeurasia and persists today. The accusation that Jews kidnap gentile (Orig. Christian) children to do nefarious things (Orig. and still relatively commonly "blood rituals" or "taking their blood to use in making Matzah") with. You'll see this often alongside "Jews rule the world" antisemitism.

Jews rule the world/Zionist-occupied government/Evil Cabals: What it says on the tin. If you see some shit about how "Oh isn't it SUSPICIOUS how many billionaires/millionaires/rich people are Jewish?" or "The ZIONIST-CONTROLLED MEDIA is suppressing this!", that's a variant on this canard.

Khazar theory: Antisemitic pseudoscientific theory that Ashkenazi Jews aren't ackshually descended from the Judeans who were forcibly exiled from our homeland, but instead descended from Turkic Khazars who converted to Judaism. Easily disproven by actual genetic studies that show that uh yeah all ethnically Jewish folks, Ashkies included, are descended from common ancestors that originated in the Levant. Also Yiddish is derived from, y'know, not Turkic languages. There are definitely Khazar Jews, but they make up a small number of an already small population. Variants you'll probably see of this are basically anything saying that Ashkies are somehow less Jewish than other Jews, that we're all White People (Jewish connection to Whiteness is Complicated) who have no connection to the Levant, How Could Ashkenazim Be From There When Some Of Them Are BLONDE?, etc. Shit like that.

stalin shit: a lot of modern leftist antisemitism has its roots in soviet antisemitism, which used "zionist" as another word for "jew" in order to pretend to not be antisemitic. people still do that today. if you see a post where "zionist" can be replaced with "jew" and it reads word-for-word like a classic antisemitic trope, well, you know. don't trust anyone who stans stalin (or modern russia to be honest. tankies (derogatory)).

this is non-exhaustive ofc. here are also blogs i recommend blocking asap (with / in their names to inhibit name-searching); they're all in the same far-left antisemitic atrocity apologist circle (i.e. assad stans, putin stans, holodomor deniers, uyghur oppression deniers, CCP stans, houthi stans, etc):

her/ita/gep/osts (north korea stan, which is fucking insane. beloved tumblr funnyman who implicitly blames jews for the actions of the israeli govt in multiple gross posts and has targeted multiple jewish bloggers, prompting mass harassment)

ko/ms/om/ol/ka (nasty character all around. claimed she was banned for being pro-palestine, it's actually prob because she's been reported before for being a fucking racist antisemitic freak lmao)

tx/tt/le/ta/le (ew)

bre/nda/nic/us (happily antisemitic. homophobic too, as a treat i guess)

blo/g/lik/ea/ne/gyp/tian (egyptian nationalist. don't ask her what happened to cairo's jews. makes nasty posts that outright state that jews should feel guilty for current events ON JEWISH HOLIDAYS.)

whe/nma/gic/fil/led/the/air (infamously antisemitic. block.)

a-si/ent-/ecli/pse ("Happy Holocaust Memorial Day")

ara/bia/n-k/nig/ht (extremely and openly antisemitic kid. just, like, don't engage)

nat/ive/ne/ws (tweet screenshots aren't news. loooooves spreading disinfo and misinfo)

ap/as-/95 (part of the tankie committee)

les/bia/nch/emi/cal/pla/nt (i think she's a jew but she's, like, the tankie tumblr pet jew istg. she's also an asshole. girl they will gladly turn you over once you outlive your usefulness 😬)

other advice: anyone who claims to be "anti-zionist NOT antisemitic" who only ever fixates on jews and jewish orgs instead of the christian zionists who vastly outnumber the entire jewish population is lying, they're antisemitic (whether they realize it or not). houthi stans generally are stupid jew-haters who would rather support the ethnic cleansing, racism, misogyny, antisemitism, and chattel slavery party than possibly say that Someone Who Rejects The Enemy(tm) is, yknow, not morally pure. people who are abnormal about ashkenazim are generally abnormal about non-ashkies, too, but in a different and still nasty way. if someone claims that "everything was fine before the Zionists(tm) attacked", they are wrong. do some research on the history of jewish life in the region and it's very clearly wrong. if someone says that they're tired of jews and jewish feelings and jewish safety being a focus, they probably don't feel particularly kind things about us in general. fact-check claims. screenshots aren't news. people who are okay with widespread civilian death/suffering in one direction probably only desire vengeance more than anything else, which does nothing for anyone and is a net loss. anyone baying for blood is suspect, anyone without a concrete solution/plan beyond "burn it down" is not going to do much constructive work in terms of delivering justice.

[frindoka]

my art timeline :-)

hi! i’m making this because i was inspired by maxpawb’s post i saw on toyhouse , which then led me to look at all my own art that is still somehow intact in my storage. this only details stuff from when i started posting online, not from when i started drawing traditionally as a wee lad. partially because my sketchbooks are lost and partially because i never really wrote down dates on my art to begin with.

a lot of dates are lost, due to the aforementioned problem of me not writing things down.. and also i have awful dissociative memory problems so there’s way too many gaps in my life. but i really did want to do this to see how much i could find & how much i could recollect.

content warning for VERY brief mentions of grooming, as well as minor mentions of real shitty friends

everything is under the cut! there might be another rb if or when i hit the image limit. curse you, tumblr.

date: ??? , i had to be around like. 11 at the time

this was when i joined warriors amino and i deleted my account because i got in trouble for having social media, LMAO. i eventually came back with a new one though. this is probably one of the only surviving art pieces from when i was THIS YOUNG, everything’s on an ipad that’s so broken it won’t even charge

i learned how to use the smudge tool on ibispaint at this time and thought i was the coolest bitch on the block for my blending

may 2019, i was like 12

my return to amino (and brief period on deviantart, which i never used again lmao) i was specifically on wings of fire amino + warriors amino. i was obsessed with airbrush shading.

this is one of my first fursonas which was a wings of fire fanflight called kitsunewings or smth. and also my first species character (he predated the dragon), a bayfox, which was drawn in krita. i never used krita again after this. coincidentally, i was also never active in bayfoxes after submitting him.

i crawled back to ibispaint no matter how many new free programs i tried.. (also tried firealpaca once. i couldn’t even figure out how to draw a line…)

may 2019, 12

the rise of my longest lasting fursona. she got stolen on a shitty app called anime maker once. i can’t remember if she’s older than the dragon, andromeda, but her older iterations definitelt are. this character was just the FIRST first fursona that i actually called that, since i didn’t even really know what a furry was at first

june 2019, 12

my first commission that i sold for like 30 deviantart points (i only used the site for commission purposes, as mentioned before i never really used it lmao)

also i tried to make a closed species on wings of fire amino. second image. it was terribly stressful ; this was around the time i met my longest lasting group of friends (hi freak bin! 5 years <3) and.. some of the worst people i’ve ever met in my life at the same time, LMAOOO

also here’s this kokichi ouma dog i made before i even knew what danganronpa was. i would find out much later, unfortunately

march 2020, still 12 (cause of my august birthday 😒)

there’s a really big gap in my files here. sad! my art kicks into gear at this point tbh, i like how i did the lines. wish i had the energy for such clean lineart still :-(

i think around this time i lost contact with the people who were my groomers (which i would realize later) and i’m thankful that i don’t even remember what their names are.

april 2020 - july 2020, 12

okay these aren’t awful actually. HOW WAS MY ART SO DETAILED. i admire baby frets power, jesus christ

i also did a design raffle when i hit 500 amino followers which is still the most i’ve ever gotten as a following. pretty crazy, i wonder who owns this dude now, i still think they’re cute

august 2020, 13

wow i’m 13 now look at that. i had to go digging for this one, only one i could find that was remotely close to my birthday (it’s the 25th!) this was a drawing for my friend bea lol

was still friends with some pretty shitty people from wings of fire amino, and it was really taking a toll on me. i don’t remember drawing as often as i used to during that time because of all of that.

december 2020, 13

i wish i could still draw backgrounds.. i need more practice

january 2021, 13

okay honestly these are really cute. i don’t know wtf kind of motivation i had for this much detail. the shading is pretty damn good

april 2021, 13

still going strong with the shading and backgrounds. not much to say around this time either lol. the first one is an older design of mine, but they’re pretty damn cute.. i wonder what happens to the desgins i lose track of? but ik this guy has a toyhouse profile i just refuse to look through my like. 200 pages of character designs on there…

july 2021, 13

PUDDLE! PUDDLE OH HOW I MISS YOU. my original favorite oc, i got so much art of him & drew him so much he reached 100 pieces in less than a month. i also met my best friend through this dude.

my art got.. blocky? here? idk what i was doing with all of that but it lasts for a while. lol

october 2021, 14

one year older and i got neo twewy for my birthday and it changed my life permanently. in several ways. anyhow, here’s frindoka furries.. they live in my files forever and will never b drawn again because they got redesigned several more times LOLLLLL

this is the month after i broke off permanently from my shitty old friends, with support of some other friends of mine. thank you guys… i did proceed to get harassed and made paranoid over my text messages by the shitty friends cause they were mad i got one of them banned from a furry adopts server for being literally dangerous. i do know it was them bc it was admitted to & they were some of the only people i gave my phone number to. i was kind of dumb for that

i was happy after my birthday because 13 was one of the worst years of my life. literal constant spirals and breakdowns because this is when i realize i was, in fact, groomed. i’m well and handling it better now.

january 2022, 14

my first d&d character, the mark of my eventual spiral into heath insanity… shadow how i miss you. i ended up redesigning them later on

march 2022, 14

i got into a pokemon arpg around this time and it took over my life for MONTHSSSS. kind of a shitty community in it though, but i appreciate how it improved my artwork. i’m back at the backgrounds! it’s shut down indefinitely now. rip eeveemporium

april 2022, 14

I FOT BACK INTO WAKFUUUU😭😭😭 also got pretty comfortable in my identity as a transgender nonbinary person, but i would get MORE comfortable about my identity later on :-)

this is going to be continued in a reblog because i did, in fact, hit the image limit. oopsie daisies

[linoone]

Its funny how people are less likely to believe victims if they have a chip on their shoulder about being abused, Or are petty about it in any way. As mentioned previously on this blog, i recently had a Moment over my ex who is just not a good person yet still has a decent following . I tried to be as mature as possible when first talking about it back in 2019 / 2020 , and people didnt really care then for a variety of reasons; But going through those logs again made me realize ... It can be very obvious when people Dont believe you for one reason or another. Especially if you dont have evidence backing it up and in some cases, That evidence just does not exist because it gets lost to time or covered up

People get tired of hearing about it if youre immature about it , or complain too much . If you feel any emotion that isnt neutral openly, basically. They stop believing you or being supportive because you speak too much about it, wonder why you havent " Moved on " ... when people heal at different rates. Even if you do express emotions on it in a rather healthy way, it becomes a "Stop talking about it" thing with certain people at a certain point. Even if its brought up in passing

Dunno. I hadnt touched the logs in years but re-reading them just reminded me of how i was treated when talking about that ex at first lmao ... And i think even if the evidence was there wrt the logs, They wouldnt have cared because my "sources" (the people being treated poorly) were "totally wrong". Or something like that, people make plenty of excuses for their friends when they turn out to be shit (admittedly i have done the same in at least one situation many years ago). But given that i am still blocked 5 years later, something tells me theyll still go to bat for that person if i were to interact with him/them again (which, ill be honest, at times i was immature & paranoid about it especially when it was all fresh; but that doesnt excuse saying something like "its good he doesnt associate with you if he abused you", paraphrasing)

[hanafubukki]

Hihi, how was your day? :3

I'm actually reading everything from the start, despite already having watched the anime. So far, the traces are so beautiful that I'm mesmerized ~ Jinshi and Maomao are so cute too, can't wait for the moment where they got together bcs obviously they're going to get together at some point hehe

For the infodump part I'm kind of forgetting to sent to you since last week:

Brazil is a mixed-race country due to its history of colonization, immigration, and interaction among different ethnic groups. Since the arrival of the Portuguese in 1500, there has been extensive mixing between Europeans, Indigenous peoples, and Africans, resulting in a diverse population. The initial interethnic relationships between Portuguese colonizers and Indigenous peoples led to the emergence of "mestizos", though this term isn't used anymore due to its derogatory meaning, and the arrival of African slaves added new cultural and genetic elements to the Brazilian population.

With the abolition of slavery in 1888, Brazil received immigrants from various parts of the world, including Europeans, Arabs, and Japanese, who also mixed with the existing population. This ongoing miscegenation over the centuries has made Brazil a country with a wide diversity of skin tones, physical features, and cultural identities. The absence of racial segregation laws also contributed to more common interethnic relationships in Brazil compared to other countries.

Despite the miscegenation, Brazil still faces challenges related to racial and social inequality. The history of mixing did not completely eliminate the racial hierarchies established during the colonial period, and Afro-Brazilian and Indigenous groups continue to face discrimination and disparities in various areas. Thus, while miscegenation has shaped the Brazilian national identity, issues of racial equality still need to be addressed.

This all for me to say that the japanese folk have an entire district where they live, called Liberdade (If translate to the letter, it means Freedom, which I think it's a very funny name). It is the largest enclave of Japanese immigration and community in the city, which, in turn, hosts the largest Japanese community in the world outside of Japan itself.

Hello Lorkai 🫂🌺💞

My day was good 🙏💞 thankfully it was a little cooler so I’m happy for that.

I can’t wait either! I wonder how Jinshi will do it? Maybe with a rare plant or poison? Momo is pretty stubborn and block headed so I want to see how that’s broken lmao

I also want to see how status will be affected, I mean her bio father does have a high position so that helps 👀 and then the whole escape of the villain too, I’m curious about.

Thank you so much for sharing about your country Lorkai, it is such an interesting read.

The lack of segregation and how that boosted relationships between people was really nice to read, so many places can learn from that.

It’s unfortunate about the inequality though, so many countries face that issues still, but it seems Brazil is handling it better? Hopefully it gets more in a positive light in the future and people can live more harmoniously. 🙏

Wow! That’s interesting! I didn’t know that about Brazil having the largest Japanese community outside of Japan. That’s so cool?!

Oh 🤔 could this be part of the reason why DBZ is so popular in Brazil? I remember reading that there was a stadium showing the movie and episode when new content came out?

With all these ethnicities, what kind of languages do they offer to learn in schools? Here we have Spanish and French in most secondary schools, with the option of other languages in higher education 🤔

[ikamigami]

If that thing was an actual virus the Creator put in Sun's head, because of the red eyes, who do we think its going to attack first?:

Could it attack Earth or Moon?

Might it try/succeed in killing Sven when he checks on Sun's systems?

Will it make Sun attack Dazzle and Jack hurts/potentially kills Sun defending her?

Will it make Sun attack Molten to capture him? Or Lunar? Or FC?

Or might Nexus and Ruin capture Sun to use him like the Creator did and it triggers then and attacks them?

Might Monty get broken again?

Or something else? No matter what it's going to be awful for Sun

Yeah if it's some virus than something like that may happen..

I imagine that Sun's line "I'll break something one of these days" (iirc) was referring to this..

This thing will take over Sun and break something.. or rather someone I presume..

I think that doesn't matter if it's virus or only a mental thing.. it'll definitely cause Sun to spiral..

I wonder if we'll get one of the things I was talking about in my blog:

Sun will try to take out this thing from his head by force which would mean his death but two things can happen - this is how he kills himself or someone stops him before he does too much damage to himself

Sun will try to kill himself during tortures caused by either Creator or Nexus - personally I think it'll be when Nexus will kidnap him cause we have more hints for this happening - cause he tried to free himself from nightmare by killing himself.. though it was a good idea but it was a bit weird that he immediately jumped to that idea without any hesitation or second thoughts.

I know that many people said that they won't show something like that but tbh.. the hints and foreshadowing to Sun trying to kill himself are strong and there's too much of that shit to ignore it..

But like I said I think that Sun won't die die.. but he'll end up in a coma or something like that..

Cause that would be awful if Sun succeeded and tbh I doubt that they'd make Sun succeed..

And imagine that I was always talking about it like that.. though I have to admit that when I had an episode I was more on edge and me talking about Sun being suicidal was more like a doom posting shshshskshkshskshksh

And for some reason people have to have a problem with that even though they didn't have a problem with others talking about Eclipse being suicidal or that Moon or Nexus are having xyz issues..

And I always tried to point out this hypocrisy which made these folks even more mad at me lol

I know that sometimes I was unnecessary mean in my posts because of the agitated state I was in back then.. but tbh I more often than not was saying that people on Discord tsbs server are stupid and they don't care about Sun..

And it made them so pissed at me lmao now it seems funny to me.. but back then when I had an episode I treated it seriously..

The truth is that I should block these people long time ago cause they never wanted to have a normal discussion about anything.. it was always we don't agree with you and/or we don't like your theories so begone..

And ofc they had to make themselves to be seen as the more righteous ones solely because it's so "wrong and disturbing" of me to say that Sun is suicidal.. even though they themselves have many angsty ideas with Eclipse..

It was okay for them to say that Eclipse actually cares way before it was confirmed but it was only hinted.. but apparently it wasn't okay for me to say that Sun has mental issues that make him suicidal when things weren't confirmed yet but only hinted..

You see the hypocrisy, right?

I think that they didn't like that I was openly critisizing them for their hypocrisy.. and that's why they were attacking me..

Sorry for the rant but I wanted to make it clear that there was never anything wrong with me saying that Sun is suicidal and that he may try to kill himself..

It was wrong of them to assume that I wished Sun to be suicidal when it was never the case but it's like that when people either can't read or they try to smear some shit about you because they don't like you.. ofc the second one is worse because it'd mean that they were doing it on purpose..

But regardless of their intentions they still hurt me a lot and they never felt the need to apologize for that.. even though I apologized for going way overboard with my words when I had an episode..

Once again sorry for the rant and I hope that you don't mind it, dear anon 🙇‍♀️

[bonesandthebees]

It's very funny to see my dash filled with QSMP stuff yet not being into it myself. I think now I understand how all those people felt when they were exposed to DSMP content/discourse, because the stuff I see now sounds absolutely insane sometimes (I dropped off after Juanaflippa died and haven't been up to date ever since).

Anyway, the Halloween story! I really liked what you did with leading us to believe that Wilbur was the guilty one (the conversation in the bar really sold that idea) and then slowly letting us realise that maybe things aren't the way we think they are. Small towns hold so many secrets..

Burning down the corn somehow felt like the last punch they could pull and in a way it was very poetic. A nice sense of closure.

I also wonder what was Phil's reaction when the boys told him the story. Could you tell us more about it? (or redirect me to a post if this was already answered)

-🌹

LMAO I'm so sorry for filling your dash with qsmp I'm sure that's gotta be wild to experience. qsmp is insane enough when you know what's going on, the outside POVs have gotta feel so wild

I don't blame you for dropping off after juanaflippa died I definitely considered dipping but then the wilbur soot tallulah week happened and I was revitalized and became extremely invested in that beanie wearing egg with hair. then I got highkey attached to everyone else and now I rotate q!phil in my mind constantly he's soooooo :)

(general reminder to my followers: if something I post a lot of and don't tag is annoying you feel free to ask me to tag it so you can block the posts! I stopped tagging my qsmp posts a while ago but I can go back to doing that or create a new tag for them if you don't wanna see them)

anyway moving on

aw thank you I'm so glad you enjoyed!! I had a lot of fun playing around with the misdirection in the foreshadowing. that conversation in the bar was especially fun to write because quackity holds the same assumption as the readers: that wilbur killed their father. wilbur knows this is what quackity thinks and doesn't do a whole lot to dissuade that notion, thus further cementing the idea to the readers as well. it was a lot of fun wordplay for me

ngl I've just always wanted to write a midwestern gothic type thing that ended with a cornfield burning down the mental image is just too cool. also like you pointed out I thought it gave the story a nice sense of closure :)

okay so this ask doesn't get too long (and so people can keep things vague if they want) i'll put the 'what happens when phil finds out' bit under the cut

so I wanted to leave things with phil vague so the readers could make their own interpretations, but I'd like to think that phil actually suspected that wilbur and tommy had something to do with their father's disappearance from the start. he never put too much stock into it though because he always thought they would've told him if they did actually have a hand in it. so instead he just kind of purposefully turned a blind eye to all the signs and imagined their father probably went and pissed the wrong person off at the wrong time while drunk and got a bullet between the eyes as a result. it wasn't exactly wrong.

anyway, finding out that his original gut feeling was right and they were the ones to kill him hurts phil a lot. not because his brothers murdered their father, but because they didn't tell him about it for ten years. when more details get revealed and he learns that tommy was the one to shoot him and not wilbur, he understands a little more why wilbur was so reluctant to tell him but still, the hurt is there. at the very least, he understands why wilbur left now, and that's been an open wound for him for years at this point. so that bit of closure, combined with knowing for sure that their father is never coming back, makes up for the pain of knowing how long his little brothers lied to him.

basically the conversation ends with phil reassuring tommy a lot while scolding wilbur for leaving for eight years instead of telling him the truth. hours later though, probably once the sun has risen and tommy has passed out in his room, phil sees wilbur sitting at the dining table staring blankly into his coffee mug. he thinks about what wilbur told him before about how he learned to run away from him, and that phil wasn't there when they needed him. he thinks about the guilt in wilbur's eyes when he told phil that tommy had to shoot their dad because he just couldn't pull the trigger himself.

and phil goes and hugs his younger brother, and tells him that it wasn't his fault. that he did the best he could. that it's okay that he couldn't pull the trigger. and wilbur hugs him back, feeling like a little kid again wrapped up in his big brother's arms.

it's not okay yet. it might not ever be fully okay. but they're dealing with it. as a family this time.

[littledamadelfuego]

ahhh!!!! thank you so much!!! i swear we could have a full-blown conversation about this. I've always wondered whether western synastry is more accurate than vedic synastry but honestly it's so haywire. also i do agree w the "subconscious block" part. he does seem like he needs a little bit of time to think about some things- like he's not fully mature yet or there yet. also i completely see your point w the nostalgic love part!!! he's VERY attached to his parents, very vocal about it, esp how close he is to his mom. i don't know how into that i am LMAO. & i completely get what u mean about the mutual aspect. usually, to figure out how a particular synastry placement may affect someone w my planets in their house, i try to visualise/remember how i was affected by that synastry placement as the house person myself in a diff friendship/relationship. ofc this is so complicated given that people respond to situations so differently & there are so many other niche aspects to consider- both within & beyond astrology. I've tried to understand houses in synastry by how i feel towards people w their personal planets in my house & I've realized I'm not usually open to 12th house synastry (as the house person)? it bothers me a bit & i tend to find those people quite annoying, usually i have a short fuse w them, they tend to get on my nerves easily (& i never express it, it's always hidden) but that might be bc i have absolutely no 12th house influence. perhaps i might be a bit welcoming to that 12th house energy if i had more 12th house influence in my natal but i don't. it's hard to tell whether he would perceive me the same way??? I've never viewed 12th house as the "soulmate" synastry (for me it's 8th house rather bc I'm quite 8th house dominant w my venus and saturn in 8th & moon sqr pluto among a lot of other pluto aspects). thank u for ur advice!! I'll definitely keep ur words in mind moving forward <3

You're welcome!!! Honestly, I think each type of astrology is valid, and it's best to use the one that feels the most true to you! But I think it's useful to learn different types of astrology to gain an added perspective!

& Yes!!! 4th House Venus can definitely indicate being close to his mother or even potentially wanting a partner like his mother... it's a definite possibility!!!

& Honestly, yes there are so so many ways to read synastry!! And it affects everyone differently!! That's why it's so important to first account for someone's own natal chart before making any general assumptions about how a certain synastry will work for them because everyone's own charts are so different, and we all have different karma's, chart configurations, familial patterns which can all affect how we react towards a certain synastry. And some are meant to experience certain synastries over others-- there is so much room for nuance.

And 12th house synastry is definitely controversial! If you don't already have a connection to it or your planets aren't making an angular connection to it, it can definitely be irritating! But I've noticed 8H'er's in particular either love it or hate it (I am an also an 8H'er with my Sun & Mercury-- caveat though, my chart ruler is in my 12H), but the thing is 8H'er's will either love how deep the 12H goes, or, conversely they will hate it, and in particular with your Venus in the 8H you probably prefer to keep certain aspects of what you love and your love life private, and you won't receive that privacy with people who are in your 12H. Most 8H'ers like to control who is able to see the deeper sides of themselves, and you don't get that choice with people in your 12H. More so, as an 8H'er you're probably quite skeptical of someone who seems to know more about you than you know yourself (as is the nature of the 12H), so it can feel very off-putting when someone brings you that energy!! & of course not everyone in your 12H has good intentions for you so it is again, always important to consider the whole chart.

Also, I don't think any house synastry alone is a *soulmate* synastry. I just think 4th, 8th, & 12th house synastry can be indicators of a potential soulmate connection because they are all spiritual houses, and these synastries imply that the connection is slightly more than what we can feel physically, and since the very nature of soulmates is spiritual I think any of these houses can be indicative of a potential soulmate, but there are again so many interpretations, but any of these houses I would want to see when considering a potential soulmate!!