#I wish I took a pic of the clogs I had on too

[rawwithlove]

✨GROOVY✨

✌🏻❤️😘

[hotvintagepoll]

Welcome to the HOT AND VINTAGE MOVIE STARS tournament! We are now finished with the Hot & Vintage Men Tournament; The Hot & Vintage Movie Women Tournament is ongoing. Submissions for hot vintage women are now closed, but we are accepting propaganda for those already in the bracket. If you are here for the Dracula Daily polls, those will be posted regularly following the progress of the Substack newsletters.

The finals of the Hot & Vintage Women Tournament will be posted just after midnight on Sunday, June 2nd, and last 24 hours. All polls—including ongoing polls, previous rounds, old tournaments, the various shadow brackets, the Dracula Daily polls, and fun mini polls—can be found in the #hotvintagepoll tag. Every poll in the Hot & Vintage Women Tournament will be tagged with the hottie in it if you need to search for someone in particular.

FAQs:

“Where is [my favorite hot woman]?” It depends. Have you checked all the polls in the tag? Have you done a tag search for her? If you still haven’t found her, either nobody submitted her or she did not fit the criteria of being a movie woman from 1910-1970.

“Can I still submit hot women?” No, the submission window has closed. Please do not send in women you wish had made it into the bracket. I can’t do anything with those asks and they just make me sad.

“I have additional propaganda for the hot women!” Great! Send me an ask or reblog the poll and add your propaganda to it. You can also tag me in posts (this is the best way to submit gifsets or fancams). I don’t boost all the propaganda I see or receive, but I try to boost the best of the best.

If you’re submitting propaganda for your hot woman, I don’t accept propaganda that’s from beyond the end of this tournament’s era (ie don’t send me pics of them from before 1910 or after 1970). I also don’t accept propaganda of TV appearances unless it’s clearly a cameo where they’re playing themselves. Please break long asks full of photos up into a few short ones so I don't clog everyone's dashes. I watch every video I receive to tag for trigger warnings, so please don't send me super long videos.

I don’t post or boost negative propaganda about any hot woman. If you really hate that a certain hot woman is winning, send me positive propaganda for their hot opponent. If you think a hottie shouldn’t even be included in the tournament because of things they did in their lifetime, please read my take on it here.

If I see repetitive, trolling, and/or bigoted remarks in the comments, I may block you from this bracket. If you want to point out a hot woman’s stances, problems, or misdemeanors, that’s fine, but if I see consistent bad-faith trolling, you will be blocked.

The views expressed in the propaganda are not my own. I don’t submit my own propaganda, and I don’t change what’s submitted beyond fixing obvious spelling mistakes. If you hate a poll bio or a pic, let me know and send me something I can use instead.

"Where are the hot men?" Most of them are in the shadow realm! Toshiro Mifune was crowned the winner of the Hot & Vintage Men Tournament, and the rest were banished where the sun never comes. You can find all the round 1 matchups here (thank you @markwatnae!), or you can do a tag search to find out what happened to a specific hot man.

"Tell me more about this shadow realm?" There is too much lore. Send me an ask about this.

"What's up with the vents?" There is too much lore. Send me an ask about this.

"Why are you always talking about James Cagney?" Bing Crosby took him out in Round 1 and I've never forgiven him.

“My FAQ isn’t on here :(” send me an ask! I love hearing from you guys—just please check these basics first.

Thank you for being here! Enjoy the tournament.

If you want to search through the different rounds of the tournaments, or see the schedule for future tournaments, I'm including links under the cut.

Relevant tags:

First round of the hot men—#round 1 archive, #round 1 blog

Second round of the hot men—#round 2 archive, #round 2 blog

Third round of the hot men—#round 3 archive, #round 3 blog

Fourth round of the hot men—#round 4 archive, #round 4 blog

Quarterfinals of the hot men—#round 5 archive, #round 5 blog

Semifinals—#TWO KINGS archive, #TWO KINGS blog

Finals—#hot men finals

First round of the hot women—#ladies 1 archive, ladies 1 blog

Second round of the hot women—#ladies 2 archive, #ladies 2 blog

Third round of the hot women—#ladies 3 archive, #ladies 3 blog

Fourth round of the hot women—#ladies 4 archive, #ladies 4 blog

Dracula polls: #dracula daily

Fifth round of the hot women—#ladies 5 archive, #ladies 5 blog

Other featured tags: #housekeeping (organization updates), #family lore (personal anecdotes in asks relating to the hotties or stories about sharing this poll with family members), #hollywood creatures (pets named after old movie stars), and #silly times (what it says on the tin).

Tournament schedule (may still change or adjust):

Hot & Vintage Movie Man Tournament (completed)

Hot & Vintage Movie Woman Tournament (ongoing)

Dracula Daily movie cast polls (ongoing)

Ultimate Hottie Tournament (top brackets of the hot men & hot women competing together)

Scrungly Little Guys tournament (gender neutral)

TBD: Horror Hotties (Frankensteins, Draculas, Brides, etc.)

TBD: Dandy Detectives (Marples, Sherlocks, Nancy Drews, etc.)

fun mini polls that pits sets of characters from the same movie together, like the Philadelphia Story or Seven Brides for Seven Brothers ones (these can be found in the #minis tag)

[birdantlers]

Uh- Hi- Hellow ;-;

I uh… Read the fic you reblogged (as a newer follower I didn’t see it when you first wrote it, so glad you reblogged it) and it tore me up so hard. I wish I could describe better how it felt to read but that’d take a lotta rambling and this is an ask so I won’t clog it up.

You write them both so well though, especially Piccolo. Seeing that aggressive side of him while way back with lil’ man Gohan, seeing you tackle the emotions he was dealing with… It really sheds a lot of light on the early stage of their relationship and I adore it ;-; I also really love how you tackled Pic and his relationship to his father, the fact he has all those memories in his head and was technically another being, conflicting personalities and expectations that he felt so expected to meet (that he thought he HAD to meet) and how he felt after finally achieving his and his father’s goal… Ugh… Sobs…

The writing itself is just stunning in every way. The way you write is gorgeous and reading through I never lost interest despite the size of it. Which might be saying a lot since I was both reading and walking around with a friend on a trip for most of it, despite everything going on I just found myself needing to keep reading that fic so bad. The use of descriptive language is top tier.

I wish I could say more but it took a lot of forcing myself to send this ask- I’m really good at procrastinating with things I wanna dofhjdnfng… Just, thank you for the fic.

Thank you for all the things you make too. Your content is something I greatly enjoy whenever I see it on my dash. You seem like a real great guy :]

KICKING MY LEGS BACK AND FORTH okay ok ok ok listennn none of y'all ever have to put a cap on talking to me about my fics okay hdjdhdj like fr I put so much work into them I love when ppl say what they liked and what they noticed it's like crack lmao

Thanks so much!! Even though I wrote this thing ages ago I still feel like I should move things a Little to the left for some reason hdjdhdj so when ppl compliment it it makes me feel relieved. Also it just gives me more motivation to work on the sequel which I'm rly excited about 👁️👁️

I'm so glad you liked it and again thanks for taking the time to write your thoughts !! 🥰 I enjoyed reading

[shorkbrian]

INBOX

SO! I know I hoard asks. It’s a bad habit. Reasons?

I like to go look at them when I’m sad because they cheer me up.

I don’t want anyone to get annoyed that my blog is clogged up with asks, it’s a fear of mine that someone will think I'm annoying.

BUTT! My inbox is so cluttered right now, It’s hard for me to find certain requests. I saw someone else do an mass ask answering like this, and I LEARNED that if I tag it, I can look that tag up on my blog!

ALSO PSA you can also comment on my pics or message me to talk!!!!! I will never turn anyone away!!! I love you all!

ANOTHER PSA - if you want to not have to see this in the future, pls block the tag “shorkbrian answers a lot of asks”

Lets get ready to rumble!!!!!!!

These are in no particular order! Know that if you don’t see an ask you sent, it’s because I plan on writing something for it, probably like a lil Drabble cause those are my favorite (can you tell?)

Hello! My pronouns are They/Them or He/Him! I want to like give u a big ole hug for this question, You’re super sweet!

OOP Okay listen I’ve had a couple dreams with very unsavory happenings and each one is awful and so so scary. I hope your dream didn’t make you feel icky or anything dude. I Lub u, stay safe.

I am speechless. This is.... wow man. This is an amazing, positive review of my work and I feel so blessed and honored that you took the time to message me. I LOVE LOVE LOVE reading what people think of my work, and this one made me just like. I am like so blessed dude. Speechless (in the best way possible)

AHHHHH Thank you!!!! Look at those emojis!!!! SO bright and colorful and fun!!!!

As a fellow Hornee person that is dumb, I would like to say...... Why stop at a chefs kiss? are you afraid to kiss me on the mouth, homie? For future reference, I like tongue. (asdaslhjkah sorry I’m stupid but Thank you for these kind words!!!! What nice descriptors man, I’m like wilting under the praise its too much!)

Yes, reader is NOT going to have a fun time. Thanks for reading! I appreciate your support so so so much!!

Hey, listen! Requests are “closed” so I can have time to catch up without getting overwhelmed. If one or two slip in, they won’t get deleted :)

Bro, I recently talked to a friend with a similar experience. I’m so sorry for the things you’ve had to deal with, it sounds awful. The world is big and scary and VERY loud, and you are so amazing for navigating it. Bakugou would give you insane cuddles to help u feel better, remember dat okie?

Maybe! I’m getting around to things babey, it might take a hot second. But I will try!

Thank you! I try babey I try lol. I Lub u by the way thank u for msging me

I accept this wisdom. Thank you for sharing. I pray for a time when I will be able to use it.

You nailed it. I want this on my tombstone pls and thank u.

omg omg thank youuuuuuuu!!!!! Honestly, I think Izuku is still so so so shy, even when it comes to doing stuff with his darling.  ugh his poor darling. Ur right tho, no one would ever believe that Izuku was doing bad stuff. But once again!!! Thank YOU for reading and taking the time to send me an ask!!!! Warms my heart

wait wait okay I LOVE LOVE LOVE Kirishima I am his BIGGEST simp and this compliment? SENT ME TO OUTER SPACE. I squealed so hard I got like liftoff and I made it out of the atmosphere. This is the BEST thing EVER Thank you SO much my heart is POURING out love Grimm I would DIE for u no cap 

idk? Personally, I hate being touched so I probably would politely be like “Pls dont ahah” but I would hit him with paper airplanes with cute little notes inside.

I wish I wish with all my heart that I could turn into a small person tonight. Like, I'm crying. I am 6′0 and built like a refrigerator aint nobody able to manhandle me... *sobs in big man syndrome* I will continue to feed u tho bc it is a GIANT fantasy of mine to be manhandled and tossed around. lets goooooo

I don’t want to be a religion, can we start a cult? I’ll be the sacrifice.

bonk bonk bonk bonk bonk bonk TOO LATE (Also thank ant the comment abc my humor! Inspires me and tbh enables me)

no U 

“hey google?”

“What can I help you with today?”

“Why do I have the SWEEEEEEETEST followers ever? How did this happen? They make me blush I can’t handle it”

I have a SIMP???????? Come off anon u and I are going to talk and then passionately kiss. (not rlly but I do Lub you, thank you for the kind and gentle words)

bonk bonk bonk bonk (Also this was sent to me on a Sunday? I live in America bruv)

Pls don’t I almost peed my pants I was snorting at 2am and trying my hardest not to disturb my cat it was very hard (Repeat I almost PEED my PANST U HEATHEN)

wait stop stop u always give me such amazing comments skid I want to give u a candle made with wax and tears of love. You are so sweet. Pls never hesitate to reach out for a chat I luv u okei

BLACK HEART ANON I’m dedicating everything in my will to u, hope you know that. Okay, but seriously - I get being afraid of people. I don’t think you’re being hypocritical, I think you’re being kind and selfless and reaching out a helping hand to a loser like me. Black heart emojis low-key always make me think of you now and it fills my heart with warmth. Thank you for existing dude,

What have I said about the chefs kiss? Kiss me on the mouth u cowards. Do it.

Also this ask made me SAWFT I want to gibe u like idk a candy heart necklace to show how SOFT and Ugh demonstrate my LUB

I am glad I found YOU!!! Not everyone bothers to comment or interact or send me nice asks. They make my day man. You rock!

YYaaaayyyyaa!!! I’m cool with all the canon characters of BNHA except for Bakubro. I adore his fanon personification, but just how he acts in the show..... that aint it chief. I totally get u

TYSM!!!! Heart heart!! Aizawa has the potential to be so creepy and awful, he’s super interesting to try and write for! I’m glad you like my content, and thank you for telling me such!!!!!!!! LUB U

GRIMMM STAWWWWWWP I’m like on the verge of like melting into a PUDDLE of goopy admiration how the heck do u even know my blog ur so cool and I still can’t believe I can like.... talk to you. Ur rad dude.

BLACK HEARTTTTTTT You are never invading my privacy. Your asks are two that I hold very near and dear to my heart. I reread them over and over and they help when I’m having sucky days. Pls pls pls recognize that you’re an amazing person and you lift up my spirits and you are genuinely awesome. I love u Black Heart

I LOVE Kiri, have I mentioned? He’s my fav. And yes!!! I am VERY open to ideas!!!! Love pretty much everything and anything that comes my way!!! thank u for sending me an ask dude, means a lot :)

Sensitive anon, my dear dear friend if ur reading this know that I adore talking with u and I like hearing about ur day and You are so sweet and you make the world a better place by being in it

WE SIMP...... TOGETHER!!!!

Another beautiful baby that I always see interacting with me!!! I love you so so much and Each time your name pops up in my motifs I get so excited to see what you say!!! I’ve been holding onto this ask FOREVER because the little picture is SO CUTE and it makes me softer than melted butter man.

Okay, we’ve done it lads! I love each and every one of you!!!!!!!

[scotianostra]

On May 21st 1424 "James the First, with his Queine, Jeane, wer solemly crouned at Scone." 

I've been through all this many times, here's a quick run through.

James was sent away for his own safety, aged 11, was captured  by pirates and sold to the English, who although we weren't officially at war with, decided to keep him for a wee while, 18 years in total. He wasn't a prisoner in the real sense of the word as he got all the royal trappings, an education, trips to France, he wrote poetry and fell in love. 

The main reason it took so long to get him back was his old man, Robert III died and his wicked Uncle, Robert Stewart, Duke of Albany took charge of Scotland and was King in all but name. Albany however did pay for the return of his own son, Murdoch around 1414, who spent some time with the young King of Scots in England, you'd have thought they might have bonded but no, more of this to come.

Albany popped his clogs in 1420 and Murdoch was now Governor of Scotland, and in 1424 a ransom for King James was agreed. I will now give you another part of the story taken from a more contemporary source and in the Scots tongue of the day.

The 26 of this same mounthe, K. James the 1. called a parliament of his estaits at Perth; and one the 9 day of the said parliament, he caussed arrest Murdack, Duck of Albaney, Earle of Fyffe and Menteith, with his 2d sone, Sr Alexander Steuarte, quhom he had knighted the day of his coronatione at Scone, and with them 26 others, viz.

Archbald, Earle of Douglas, Will: Douglas, Earle of Angus, George Dumbar, Earle of Marche, Sr Adam Hepburne of Hailles, Sr Thomas Hay of Zester, Valter Halyburtone, Valter Ogluey, Dauid Steuarte of Rassythe, Alex: Settone of Gordon, Will: Erskyne of Kinoule, Alex: Earle of Craufurd, Patrick Ogiluey of Ochterhousse, Jhone Steuarte of Dundonald, Dauid Murray of Gaske, Jo: Steuarte of Cardine, William, Lord Hay, Grate Constable, Jo: Scrymgeour of Didope, Alex: Irwin of Drum, Herbert Maxwoll of Carlauerock, Herbert Harries of Terregils, Androw Gray of Fouills, Robert Cuninghame of Kilmuers, Will: Crighton of the same, Alex: Ramsay of Dalhousey. This same day he arrest, lykwayes, Sr Johne Montgomerey of the same, and Allane Otterburne, secretarey to the Duck of Albaney; and they too wer releassed within three dayes. This same zeire, James Steuarte, the Duck of Albaneys youngest sone, quho had escaped the Kings hands wnpprehendit, raisses such forces as he could, burns the toune of Dunbritton, kills Johne Steuarte, (called the Read) of Dundonald, and 32 more, and then, with his fathers old secretarey, Finlaw, Bis: of Argyle, fleis to Irland. 1425.This zeire, 1425, the Lordes of Montgomery and Kilauers, with Sr Humfrey Cuninghame, are sent by the King with ane armey to beseidge the castell of Kilmauerrin, now Loche Lomond, keipt aganist authority by the partey of James Steuarte, the youngest sone of Murdack, Duck of Albaney. This same zeir, in the mounthe of Junij, the Ladey Margarete Kinges eldest daughter, was borne. 1426.The 18 day of Maij, this zeire, 1426, the King adiorned his parliament to Streueling from Perth, till the 24 day of the said mounthe; befor quhom wes accussid Walter Steuart, eldest sone to Murdack, Duck of Albaney, quho receuid sentence of death, and lost his head this same day, befor the castell one a litell rocke; and one the morrow, lykwayes, Murdack, Duck of Albane, with his 2d sone, Alexander Steuarte, and hes father in law, Duncane, Earle of Lennox, being accusid, wer all 4 forfaulted, and condemned to losse ther heades, by an assise of ther peirs. The assierrs wer:- Walter, Earle of Athole, Archbald, 3d of that name, E. of Douglas, Alex: Earle of Ross, Lord of the Iles, Alex: Steuarte, Earle of Mar, Will: Douglas, Earle of Angus, Will: St. Clair, Earle of Orknay, George Dumbar, Earle of Marche, James Douglas, Lord Balueney, Gilbert Hay, Lord of Erole, Grate Constable, Robert Steuarte, Lord Lorne, Sr Jo: Montgomerey of the same, Sr Thomas Somerwaill of the same, Sr Herbert Harries of Terregills, James Douglas, L. Dalkeith, Robert Cuninghame, L. Kilmauers, Sr Alex: Leuingston of Calender, Sr Thomas Hay of Locharret, Sr Will: Borthwick of the same, Sr Patrick Ogiluey, Shriffe of Angus, Sr Jo: Forrester of Corstorphin, Sr Walter Ogiluey of Lintrathen. By thir assisers they wer forfaulted, and sentenced to losse ther heads; wiche was put to executione one a litle rocke be east Streuelin castle, this same monithe. After wich forfaultrey, the King seassed ther haill estaits in his hands, and caussed, in this same parliament, annex the earledome of Fyffe to the croune.

Basically James was getting his revenge on all those he thought were complicate with his long absence from Scotland, and if you look through these names there are some pretty heavyweight families amongst them. I will post a link if you wish to go through what happened over the next 11 years, but at the end of the day he was making too many enemies, it didn't help that during his "holidays" in France while a guest of the English King, he fought against Scots during what became known as the 100 year war.

In 1437 it all came to a head, James I was assassinated in a failed coup by his uncle Walter Stewart, Earl of Atholl, at Perth, who needs enemies when you have a family like the Stewart's eh! 

The pic is James and his bride. 

As promised you can read the rest in Scots, from the excellent web pages of my Twitter friend Jenny Random Scottish History, a gold mine of information for folk like me!  https://randomscottishhistory.com/2018/06/06/james-the-first-1424-1437-king-of-scotland-pp-153-166/

[lady-divine-writes]

Need for Speed:New York - Chapter 2 (Rated NC17)

Summary:

It's been years since high school graduation, and Kurt and Blaine are living the lives of their dreams in New York City alongside their best friends, Nick and Jeff. Car racing behind them, they're working towards the future - Kurt and Jeff at NYADA, Blaine and Nick at NYU. But soon after moving from their tiny apartments to a bigger loft, bits and pieces of Ohio start to weed their way in to their lives - along with some New York grown angst, causing rifts that hopping behind the wheel of a Mustang might not be able to solve.

Notes: This was supposed to upload on Saturday, but I need a little positivity today, so I'm indulging. But there will be another chapter up Sat/Sun. Thank you all for your support <3

Read on AO3.

“A new bed, a new dresser, a new desk, a refrigerator … wait. I thought the loft came with a refrigerator?” Blaine said.

“It does, but it’s from the 50s,” Kurt said, racing down the sidewalk to the NYADA main entrance with his phone pressed to his ear. “It’s retro chic, but I worry about its energy efficiency.”

“Do you wanna get rid of it or …?”

“No way! Are you kidding? It’s too trendy to get rid of. We’ll use it as a show piece or something. We just can’t put food in it. Or plug it in.”

“O-kay. You know, it’s a good thing we’re getting such a good deal on this loft seeing as we’re rebuying every piece of furniture we own.”

“Not every piece.”

“Most of them.”

“It’s a good investment. As far as I’m concerned, the furniture we have is full to the brim with bad juju.” Kurt hurried through the double doors as a throng of other students walked out - a group of theater majors so enthralled in a debate over whether Williams, Shaw, or O’Neill were the best playwright of their time, they didn’t see Kurt until they ran into him. “The dresser’s way too small, the couch cushions are flat as pancakes, and the legs of the bed are shot from moving it in and out of the kitchen all summer long.”

“Are you sure that’s the reason our bed’s legs are shot?”

“That’s the one I’m going with while I’m out in public.”

“And I’m guessing an exorcism is out of the question?”

“I’m not too sure the Catholic Church would be eager to help us. Besides, you honestly think that would be cheaper than a trip to IKEA?”

“Hmmm … probably not.”

Kurt sighed, sliding his messenger bag, then his coat, off his shoulders and shaking out the rain. “I’m sorry. Is this too much? I think I kind of jumped into this without consulting you first.”

“No, no! Not at all! I’m not complaining, I swear! I’m just bustin’ your chops. I think it’s adorable. And it’ll probably be cheaper in the long run to buy brand new stuff than to cart our old junk to the new place.”

“Exactly,” Kurt concurred even though that particular argument hadn’t crossed his mind.

“Plus, I fully support any opportunity you find to spread your designing wings. Speaking of, you’re letting me foot the bill for this shopping spree, right?”

“Absolutely not! 50/50. That’s the arrangement.”

“If that’s how you want it, darling. But you know …” Blaine’s voice slid lower and Kurt grinned, knowing that something suggestive was about to come out of his boyfriend’s mouth “… I could pay the bill, and you could work off your half in trade.” He growled, and even though Kurt rolled his eyes, certain parts of his body rose to the occasion.

“You wish,” Kurt said, willing away the erection that sprang up like a Pavlovian dog at Blaine’s growl, which, at any other time, would be followed by his boyfriend on his hands and knees. That was difficult to accomplish from across town. “Come on, let me go! I have to get to my first class. I’m already late enough to not show up!” Damn Jeff and Nick for not coming home last night, Kurt thought as he carefully folded his soaked coat inside out and draped it over his arm. Since their normal five a.m. shenanigans didn’t wake Kurt up, and his alarm never does, he was late getting ready, late for the train, and now, he’s just plain late for the day.

Honestly, that was on him for linking his circadian rhythm to his friends’ sex schedule.

But late for his first class meant his day was shot, so he might as well go home and keep packing, right?

Sounded reasonable to him.

“Alright, alright, alright! Get to class! Do all the things! I’ll see you later this afternoon, and then maybe we could do a little house warming celebrating of our own.” Blaine growled again, and Kurt re-positioned his sopping wet coat over the front of his jeans so as to not to make a scene.

“You order a pizza and I’ll grab a sleeping bag from the apartment on my way over.”

“It’s a date. Bye, darling.”

“Bye.” Kurt hung up the call. He shivered when the doors behind him opened, ushering in a breeze that spiraled through his damp clothes and straight to his bones. He started down the hall, trying to remember whether or not he’d left a change of clothing in his locker in the costume closet. If not, he could always borrow something. What plays were going on right now? Much Ado About Nothing? Waiting for Godot? Cat on a Hot Tin Roof? There had to be a pair of jeans and a semi-fashionable button-down shirt in there that would fit him. Or he could throw caution to the wind and dress up in a brocade vest, a long coat, and pantaloons. With the risky outfits he wore during high school, period dress was something he hadn’t tried. NYADA seemed like the perfect place to explore those vistas in fashion. Maybe he could start a trend. He was interning at Vogue. He needed to do more to stretch boundaries, be bold, start a movement.

Get dry. Because the longer he waited, the tighter his jeans became. They were tight enough as it was. Squishing his junk was not the fashion statement he needed to start today.

A familiar voice stopped him before he could convince himself to go to his second lecture dressed like Benedick … or Beatrice.

Not just stopped but skidded to a halt, nearly rolling his right ankle in the process.

“Hello, gorgeous. I think you forgot your bag.”

“Sebastian?” Kurt spun around. And as implausible as it seemed, Sebastian Smythe was standing behind him, Kurt’s messenger bag slung over his shoulder. He looked dryer than Kurt, so he couldn’t have just gotten there. But why was he there at all? “Oh my God!” Kurt opened his arms and hugged him without giving it a second thought. “We haven’t seen you in forever! I thought you were overseas! What are you doing in New York?”

Sebastian returned the hug single-armed. ““Haven’t you heard? I go here now.”

Kurt stepped out of Sebastian’s embrace so quickly, he almost succeeded in twisting that ankle. “Wait? What? Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” He brought his left arm forward, showing Kurt a stack of books he held clutched in his hand. The top one Kurt recognized right away as Intro to Theater. That happened to be the class he was missing this very moment. The second was A History of Shakespearean Dress Making, the elective Kurt had fourth today, and the third … The Beginner’s Guide to Mime? Kurt didn’t understand. Wasn’t Sebastian attending Oxford or something? Why would he be in New York taking theater, mime, and dress making? It didn’t make sense. “Wha---what, are you … did you really … how in the hell did you …?” Kurt went silent, mouth open as a dozen questions clogged up his throat like rush hour traffic.

He flashed back to his own audition for NYADA – the grueling hour spent in the April Rhodes Auditorium singing his prepared musical theater piece and sight reading another. He had to juggle set design, costume, and choreography all at a professional level to prove that he had what it took to go to this school. Jeff, who auditioned in dance, had to prepare two separate solos – one classical ballet and one hip-hop. At an additional placement interview, Kurt had to prepare another musical theater piece as well as deliver a monologue, and Jeff had to come up with three more dance routines – jazz, interpretive, and contemporary.

Kurt knew that Sebastian had music in his arsenal. He was co-captain of The Warblers at Dalton, but that was show choir. They sang top 40 hits and pulled off some synchronized swaying – nothing to the level of a NYADA audition. Kurt attended the last Warbler concert of their senior year with Blaine. Sebastian had a solo. Kurt remembered thinking he had a decent voice – better than decent, actually.

But that was about it.

Afterwards, at a mixed crew going-away party, Sebastian drank three beers and smoked a joint – something Kurt would never think of doing as a performer. His body was his instrument. He wouldn’t do anything that might put it out of tune.

Going to a school like NYADA wasn’t only about talent. It was about passion and sacrifice. Sebastian never said a word about wanting to join the arts professionally. Was he keeping it a secret – maybe from his dad? Maybe his life was like George the janitor’s and he was waiting for his moment to break free.

Could he have actually made it into NYADA?

“Wait, wait, wait! Hold up!” Sebastian juggled the books in his hand to grab his phone and snap a pic. The flash went off in Kurt’s face, but he didn’t even blink. Sebastian looked at the image on his screen and chortled. “Oh yeah! That's a keeper!”

“I still don’t … I don’t … how did you …?”

“I don’t go here, ya psycho!” Sebastian snorted, setting the books down on a nearby chair. “I came here to see you! The tuition here’s highway robbery, and the audition requirements are insane! You really have to commit yourself to a life of suffering and poverty to want to go here, no offense.”

“None taken, you useless walnut. Then where did you get those?” Kurt pointed at the books.

“I borrowed them from the library. I thought it would give me provenance, help me look the part.”

“A-ha. So you came here looking for me, and when you couldn’t find me, you went to the library and grabbed those books to pretend you go here on the off chance I’d walk through the door and you could pull this elaborate prank on me?”

Sebastian shrugged. “Worked, didn’t it?”

Kurt chuckled. “Yup. I guess it did. You’re one lucky bastard.”

“That, and I ran into Jeff about half an hour ago. He said you’d probably be along soon.”

“He should know. He’s the reason I’m late, the jerk. You still haven’t told me what you’re doing in New York?”

“Yeah …” Sebastian glanced down at his feet, worrying the linoleum with the toe of his sneaker “… well, after a few laps around the world, I got bored and decided it was time to settle down for a while. So I thought I’d come back to the states, go to school and finish my degree.”

“What degree?” Kurt asked, deciding he could afford to miss one Intro to Theater class to catch up with an old friend. Besides, this information was bordering on gossip, and Kurt wasn’t one to kick gossip out of bed.

“Originally, I was going to go into law. Become a states’ attorney like my dad. But it seemed empty to me. So I gave it some thought and asked myself – when was the last time I really enjoyed myself? The last time I was really happy? Aside from driving, the answer to that was music. And since I didn’t see myself becoming the next Dale Earnhardt, Jr. …”

“Mmm … probably not …” Kurt teased.

“… I applied to the music therapy program at NYU.”

Kurt’s nose scrunched. “The same program Blaine’s in?”

“Yup.” Sebastian’s eyes sheepishly found his sneaker again. “I’ll admit, I got the idea from his Facebook posts. It looks like something he really enjoys. Something that adds value to his life. That’s something I need more of – value.” He pinched his lower lip between his teeth. “That doesn’t make you uncomfortable, does it? I mean, I know we all have a past and everything but …”

“But we’ve gotten over it,” Kurt said. “I swear. Color me a little bit shocked, but that’s all. How big of an asshole would I have to be if I said ‘I know you finally found your purpose in life, but you need to give it up and leave’?”

“Pretty big,” Sebastian agreed.

“That doesn’t mean it’s open season on my man or anything.”

“Dammit!” Sebastian snapped his fingers in mock disappointment. “I’m heading his way now, and I was hoping for a little bathroom bj action.”

Kurt crossed his arms over his chest. “Nice.”

“I’m kidding! Kidding! Please, don’t hate me … or murder me in my sleep.”

“Hmph! I’ll think about it.”

Sebastian nodded, the last dregs of laughter fading in his throat. “All joking aside, I wanted to connect with you first. I wanted you to hear from me instead of Blaine that I was here.” Sebastian looked Kurt up and down, but not in the way he used to. Not in a way that made Kurt’s skin crawl. This was a different Sebastian Smythe. A new Sebastian Smythe. Kurt hoped this one stuck around for a while. “You look good.” 

“Thanks,” Kurt said, grateful that Sebastian overlooked the drowned rat aesthetic he was still sporting. “So do you.”

“Do I?”

“Yes. You look happier. More ...” The first word that jumped to Kurt’s mind was mature, but he thought that would make him sound conceited “… put together.”

“It helps when you leave drama behind you and get your shit straightened out. Maybe now I can focus on the important things.”

“If you need anything, let us know,” Kurt said, offering Sebastian one last hug.

“I will.” Sebastian wrapped his arms around Kurt’s torso and gave him a squeeze. He slipped Kurt’s bag over his shoulder, adjusting the curled strap for longer than necessary. “I have to go. Time to head over to NYU and bug your boyfriend.”

“He’ll be at lunch in about an hour. You can catch him at Kimmel Marketplace. Oh, and if you see Nick, do me a favor and punch him in the shoulder for me. I have to hunt down Jeff and do the same.”

“Of course, but why?”

“Oh, they know what they’ve done.”

***

“So, you’re moving, huh?” Green eyes narrowed to judgmental slits, waiting for Blaine to answer.

“Uh … yeah,” Blaine replied, fishing through his bag for his notebook. He was supposed to have three, but he could only find two. He smirked, wondering if Kurt had grabbed it by accident, seeing how distracted he was when he ran out to catch his train this morning.

Blaine felt slightly guilty for that one. Kurt blamed Jeff and Nick’s absence for his lateness.

But Blaine had been doing the distracting.

“And whose idea was that?”

“My boyfriend wanted to move and I thought it was a good idea, so … yeah.” Blaine grunted, pulling out each item one by one and stacking it neatly on the cafeteria table. “That’s pretty much how that went down.”

“I see.” Paul brushed a lock of blond hair out of his face and sipped his coffee, perturbed by this recent development. The apartment Blaine lived in (though Paul had never been there) was only a few subway stops away from NYU. Everything Blaine could ever need was here on campus. Everything. So he didn’t need to move. But apparently that wasn’t Blaine’s decision to make. His boyfriend did.  “Where to?”

“A loft out in Bushwick.”

“Bushwick?” Paul’s whole face crumpled in disgust. “Where the hell is Bushwick? It sounds like a slum.”

“It’s in Brooklyn. It’s actually a pretty nice neighborhood.”

“But what about all that travel? It’s still Brooklyn.”

“It’s not that big a deal. Besides, it’s worth it. You should see the place. It’s enormous!”

Paul smiled, the piercings in his dimples mirroring the glint in his eyes. “Is that an invitation?”

“Sure. I guess. I mean, I should step up and host study night now that I have the space. I’m sure Kurt won’t mind. I can probably connive him into making some snacks. He’s an amazing cook.”

“I’ll bet,” Paul said dryly. “You know, the course load only gets harder from here on out, so I hear. You really should consider living closer to campus.”

“I don’t know if you’ve been looking at the classifieds lately, but places near campus cost an arm and a leg. I’d like to keep mine for now. I’m not even in grad school yet,” Blaine said, chuckling at his own joke.

“Maybe you could find someone to bunk with during the week,” Paul suggested, sliding closer while Blaine had his back turned, head deep inside his bag, “and go to your loft on the weekends. I know a couple of guys who do that.” He snapped his fingers as if he just came up with a genius idea. “I have a fold-out couch. You can bunk with me whenever you’re working late, or you’re too tired to ride the subway … or you don’t want to go home.”

“I appreciate the offer, but I’d miss my boyfriend too much.” Blaine yanked out a handful of letters from Kurt and piled them on top of his text books. Paul watched, his lip curling once he noticed the flowery handwriting. “I can handle the extra commute. I’m a big boy.”

Paul grinned, looking Blaine over behind the safety of Blaine’s back, stopping when his eyes reached his ass. “I’m sure you are.”

“Anderson! Hey, Anderson!”

Blaine grinned to his eyebrows before he looked up. He’d recognize that voice, booming his name, anywhere. He’d heard rumors. He didn’t know if they’d be true.

Apparently, they were.

Walking through the cafeteria crowd came Sebastian Smythe, sauntering toward him, reminiscent of the first day they met in the commons at Dalton.

God! That simultaneously seemed like yesterday and ten years ago. Where had the time gone?

“Are you kidding me? Where in the hell did you come from?” Blaine leapt out of his seat and into Sebastian’s arms. “Last I heard, you were in London? Madrid?”

“Paris,” Sebastian said, lifting Blaine up a foot off the ground just because he could. “I just came from NYADA. Had a little fun scaring the shit out of your man. He said you might be here. Speaking of …” Sebastian’s smile dropped like a lead balloon when he caught sight of the guy  with the bottle blond mop and garish crayon red tips glaring daggers at him, as if he and Blaine had been enjoying an intimate lunch and Sebastian was intruding “… who the hell is this?”

“This is Paul Johnson,” Blaine said. “He’s my lab partner this semester.”

Sebastian didn’t offer him a hand. Paul didn’t offer one either.

“Yes,” Paul said, “but we’ve known one another since freshman year, so …” He left it open-ended, as if there were a whole history of him and Blaine understood within the invisible brackets bookmarking that unfinished statement. It was pretentious, and as a once pretentious person himself, it rubbed Sebastian the wrong way.

Blaine, however, didn’t seem to notice.

“Paul Johnson?” Sebastian huffed. “That sounds like a stripper name. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Stripping is a noble profession.”

Paul’s jaw locked tight. Blaine clapped Sebastian on the shoulder.

“Play nice,” he said. “So, what’s up? Did you get your books and shit? Do you know what classes you’re taking?”

“Haven’t got my books yet, dad,” Sebastian teased, “but I have my course list.” He handed Blaine his phone with his schedule listed on the screen. “According to this, I’ve got to get myself one of those …” He gestured dismissively at Paul.

“Too bad you weren’t here a few weeks ago. We could have been partners.”

From the corner of his eye, Sebastian saw Paul grimace.

“Wouldn’t that have been a hoot? Then I could have kept you out of trouble. Now I’ve gotta stalk your ass.” Another glare from Paul, but this time Sebastian matched it and held it, not blinking until Paul backed down … which he did, returning to the task of sulking inside his coffee cup. “Hey, do you happen to know where Nick is?”

“Uh, I think he’s at his internship already. Brown, Smith, Simon, and Kent on 5th Avenue. Why do you ask?”

“I’m supposed to punch him. Per Kurt’s request.” Sebastian pounded his left palm with his right fist and side-eyed Paul. “I could punch you instead. Something tells me Kurt would approve.”

“Ha … ha …” Blaine stepped between Sebastian and Paul and gave his old friend another hug. “It’s good to see you again, man, but unfortunately, we’ve got to get back to work.”

“Yes,” Paul said, his smug smile replacing the perma-glare on his face, “we’ve got to get back to work.”

“And I’ve got to swing by admissions,” Sebastian said, ignoring Paul, “but we’ll get together soon, right?”

“Absolutely! Did Kurt tell you about the new loft?”

“Nah. We only had time for a small make-out sesh. We didn’t get that far.”

Blaine raised an unamused brow. “You’re full of the jokes today, aren’t you?”

“He’s full of something,” Paul grumbled.

“Just excited to be back. And tryin’ to keep you on your toes. I’m harmless ... mostly.” Sebastian bumped the table with his thigh. Paul’s coffee cup tipped, sending him scrambling to catch it before it could fall off the edge.

“Right,” Blaine said, mildly confused. “I’ll shoot you the deets and you can come by for dinner. Otherwise, we’ll see you around campus?”

Sebastian threw a look over his shoulder, and since Paul had been boring holes in his back the whole time, willing him to move the hell on, he was in prime position to catch it. “I’m looking forward to it.”

[yunsangelic]

captaindboss’ Hottest NHL Players Survey Responses

I’m demonkonecny bc it’s halloween!!! Happy Halloween!!! Anyway I’m finally posting the results of my hottest players per team survey, (it’s closed now so u can’t take it anymore, sorry) which included ur fav ugly hots like jack eichel and connor mcdavid. Y’all had some colorful write-in responses for me, I included my favorites! Anyway, as not to clog dashes I put it under a read more. If you have questions about how I compiled this data or how I organized it, feel free to ask! Also some of y’all didn’t put an answer for like half the teams???? who raised you.

Montreal Canadians

Carey Price (55.02%--126 of 229 votes)

Jonathan Drouin (23.58%--54 of 229 votes)

Shea Weber (13.10%--30 of 229 votes)

Other* (8.30%--19 of 229 votes)

*= Inconclusive results.

Write-ins

“PK Subban...oh wait...Lars Eller... Oh wait...Drouin...oh wait...Alex Galchenyuk...oh wait shit fine Shea Weber”

“Everyone who has escaped”

“their ‘attitude problem’“

Boston Bruins

Brandon Carlo (30.26%--69(lol) of 228 votes)

Patrice Bergeron (Cause y’all would kill me if I didn’t put him) (29.82%--68 of 228 votes)

David Pastrnak (yum i lov carb) (25.88%--59 of 228 votes)

Other* (14.04%--32 of 228 votes)

*= Inconclusive results.

Write-ins

[About Carlo] “He’s  a baby but also like has an ageless vampire quality which appeals to my ovaries, long conditioned by teen vampire novels”

“Brad Marchand's tongue (only the tongue)” [this ain’t it chief]

“I love my alien father tuukka rask” [r u ok]

Bonus, cause I’m weak:

“no one THINKS pasta is hot COME ON i hate us” [it’s okay, he is VERY hot, that’s why I put him lmao]

“Zdeno chara babey” [R U OK]

Bl*ckh*wks

Girl as if (44.80%--99 of 221 votes) 

Jonathan Toews (22.62%--50 of 221 votes)

If you put pk*ne here i’ll come to your house and murder you*^/other (17.65%--39 of 221 votes)

hahahahaHAHAHA (14.93%--33 of 221 votes)

*= tie between Nick Schmaltz and John Hayden.

^= 3 people want me to come to their houses and murder them, unfortunately it’s still illegal to do so, therefore I will not be doing that.

Write-ins

“toews player portrait makes him look like a human condom”

“i live in chicago and am willing to take 1 for the team and take out k*ne” 

“Bitch you funny but also Alex Debrincat”

New York Rangers

Brady Skjei (46.32%--107 of 231 votes)

Henrik Lundqvist duh (31.17%--72 of 231 votes)

Brett Howden is the right answer despite not being on the roster yet^ (11.69% (lol)--27 of 231 votes)

Other* (10.82%--25 of 231 votes)

*= Inconclusive results.

^= funny enough, like 2 days after I made this Brett made the final cut lmao.

Write-ins

“Chris Kreider (have you seen the golf pic???) [LMFAO yeah I have (it’s probably too NSFW if ur in public fyi if u wanna google it)]

“i'm horny for like half the gd rangers roster!!!!” [lol girl I know, y’all actually have a few cuties I was a lil shocked]

“this is a hot team too bad they suck”

Toronto Maple Leafs

Y’all are demons okay Nikita Zaitsev is a fuckin gem idk why I was surprised about this but I was lmao.

Other* (39.37%--87 of 221 votes) [just know that I hate u all :/]

William Nylander (25.79%--57 of 221 votes)

Nazem Kadri (24.89%--55 of 221 votes)

Nikita Zaitsev (9.95%--22 of 221 votes)

*= Freddie Andersen. 

Write-ins

“william nylander isn't a leaf, firstable, and second it's motch murner” [sjdhkdlsjdj everything about this]

“i'm putting rich clune even tho he's on the marlies. SOMETIMES HE COMES UP. he could benchpress ever leaf on the roster.” [ur valid, when u sent this I was like “FUCK they’re right.”]

“None they look like 25 year olds who smoke crack in the parking lot” [this is low-key mean but I still laughed, cause yeah, white dudes. But I’m not condoning drug abuse or jokes about drug abuse, as this person had no intention of doing, I’m sure. Just wanted to put that because I know some people might be concerned.]

Bonus, again, weak:

"Jxhn Txvxrxs” [jhkhfoij why did u censor his name sis??]

“nobody’s attractive on the leafs” [this isn’t true but I’m petty and it’s funny.]

Detroit Red Wings

I was so fucking offended by some of the dylan larkin SLANDER up in these write-ins, y’all can come to my house and fight me thx.

Dylan Larkin (48.23%--109 of 226 votes)

Henrik Zetterberg (im crying) (31.42%--71(CRYING) of 226 votes)

Other* (11.95%--27 of 226 votes)

Andreas Athanasiou (8.41%--19 of 226 votes)

*= 12 votes for “No one/Not Dylan Larkin” (yall r annoying lmfao), 10 votes for Filip Zadina (he’s a CHILD how dare u)

Write-Ins

“Luke glen denting is hot look at his arms and he’s not too old for ME” [girl when I tell u this shit killed me, I mean I SQUAWKED a laugh out and sent it to the fps gc, I was DEAD] 

“I don't know what any of the red wings look like and it's probably better that way” [????????????????]

“ion know anyone on the wings except zadina and he scored a gwg against the bruins yesterday so my answer for this one is none 😤😤” [(this was in reference to a pre-season game) lmao sis yall are okay. it was yalls babies against our roster players, I would have offed myself had the outcome been any different lmao]

Bonus

“Does anyone actually play for the red wings” [no]

“filip "thot" zadina” [don’t....]

Los Angeles Kings

The only right answer is Alec Martinez (41.56%--96 of 231 votes)

Adrian Kempe (38.10%--88 of 231 votes)

Anze Kopitar (12.12%--28 of 231 votes)

Other* (8.23%--19 of 231 votes)

*= Inconclusive results.

Write-ins

“jeff carter would snort a line of coke with gritty” [uhhhhh WHAT]

“uhh wayne gretzky...” [jvfluhddsf sis...]

“I couldn't name anyone on this team if you PAID ME” [fjldfdhfh god I wish that were me, sorry annie u know I joke....]

Philadelphia Flyers

Claude Giroux (44.78%--103 of 230 votes)

Travis Konecny (HAHAHAHAHA that’s my ugly hot gremlin) (24.78%--57 of 230 votes

Other* (22.17%--51 of 230 votes

Wayne Simmonds (8.26%--19 of 230 votes)

*= Nolan Patrick is apparently who y’all think is the 3rd hottest flyer, even tho he Looks Like That rn lmao. fuckin’ lettuce head.

Write-ins

“Gritty's googly eyes are the windows to the soul”

“andrea helfrich” [ur right]

“tk, because country boy i LOVE you 😛”

Bonus

“hey don't make threats abt gritty like that” [I put “if you put gritty i’ll block you”]

“My hellspawn son [Gritty,] is beautiful can’t believe Voracek and G had a son tho” [HDKUHEDKJFHD BITCH]

Pittsburgh Penguins :(

Kris Letang (55.17%--128 of 232 votes)

Other* (19.40%--45 of 232 votes)

Not Sidney Crosby [this is the option for Sidney Crosby] (16.81%--39 of 232 votes)

Tristan Jarry (8.62%--20 of 232 votes

*= different variations of “none” won but only by one vote, the person right behind was Jamie Oleksiak.

Write-ins

“the penguins roster came into my home and killed my entire family, but jamie oleksiak is 6'7" 255 lbs of A Man” [NDKFHSJRFDRBSKRFH valid]

“no penguin has ever been hot. As soon as they put on the jersey the hotness evaporates. Tragic.” [wow look at all that truth right there]

“as a heterosexual i chose letang, and as a flyers fan i choose the penguin mascot” [lmao girl letang is not the answer either]

St. Louis Blues

Colton Parayko (67.11%--151 of 225 votes)

Alex Pietrangelo (17.33%--39 of 225 votes)

Other* (8%--18 of 225 votes)

Ryan O’Reilly (7.56%--17 of 225 votes)

*= Inconclusive results.

Write-ins

“this [’other’] box shouldn’t exist there are no valid arguments against the angel colton parayko” [tru, but the blues have other hotties so I made the box to be fair to those of us who don’t like Big Blonde Sexies]

“uh valid i guess? idk any of the blues lmao” [LMAOOO I think they meant Vladdy, but “valid�� cracked me up]

“ROR can lay me down” [ur so valid lmao]

Buffalo Sabres

Jeff Skinner (60.18%--136 of 226 votes)

Rasmus Ristolainen (17.26%--39 of 226 votes)

Other* (14.16%--32 of 226 votes)

Jack Eichel (8.41%--19 of 226 votes)

*= Inconclusive results. [Y’all big mad that I put Skinner on here. HE’S HOT!]

Write-ins

“Idk but not these lmao” [*instert that gif of the kardashians like “DON’T BE FUCKING RUDE”*]

“Why is Jeff Skinner an option he looks 12″ [who else tho sis. I looked at the roster!]

“If anyone says eichel i will come to their house and steal their toothbrushes. Its conor sheary.” [I took my own survey and picked Eichs but I still have my toothbrush so I guess......... I’m right.]

Bonus:

“Rasmus Ristolainen kinda looks like a creepy half-alive Ken doll, but I'll stand by my choice. Hire an exorcist.” [JDFKHRFWEH GIRL]

“They lost their only cute player when O’Reilly got traded sorry” [boom. roasted]

Vancouver Canucks

Brock Boeser (67.56%--152 of 225 votes)

Other* (13.78%--31 of 225 votes)

Jake Virtanen (12.44%--28 of 225 votes)

Ben Hutton (6.22%--14 of 225 votes)

*=Inconclusive results.

Write-ins

“[about Jake Virtanen] all that ass...........” [sjdkfhdkfhdkhfi yeah]

“the city of vancouver” [?????????????????????]

“I keep forgetting that the canucks actually exist” [I’m reasonably sure this is annie lmfao]

Bonus

“I don’t know how any of this team looks either” [idk if I follow Nucks blogs or what but how do u not know Boeser???]

“i don't care enough about this team to even attempt to answer” [this is my brain @ me on the last 5 questions of an exam]

New York Islanders

Mat Barzal (67.69%--155 of 229 votes)

Tito Beauvillier (14.85%--34 of 229 votes)

Jordan Eberle (10.48%--24 of 229 votes)

Other* (6.99%--16 of 229 votes)

*=Inconclusive results.

Write-ins

“you say put full names but then u go and say tito??” [LISTEN I was tired at this point and forgot that I was trying to be at least a little bit professional about my thirst survey alright? yeesh]

“Its Matt Martin my dude” [LMAO u funny]

“idk how anyone pays attention to mat when tito is always there looking better barzal looks like every attractive jock ive ever met and i dont trust that”

Calgary Flames

Noah Hanifin (37.95%--85 of 224 votes)

Elias Lindholm (32.59%--73 of 224 votes)

Matthew Tkachuk (20.54%--46 of 224 votes)

Other* (8.93%--20 of 224 votes)

*= Sean Monahan wins 4th hottest.

Write-ins

“[Hanifin] looks like the bad guy in a teen movie. the guy the Main Girl is dating in the beginning but is a real dick to her. you look at him and you KNOW he has a trust fund and votes republican. god he's so hot though” [hanny......... yeah.... yeah....]

“Why do I find Tkachuk attractive? I don't know but I love him” [me too]

“James 'The Real Deal' Neal” [lol I got this answer multiple times]

Washington Capitals

Tom Wilson (31.33%--73 of 233 votes)

Andre Burakovsky (29.18--68 of 233 votes)

Braden Holtby (24.03%--56 of 233 votes)

Other* (15.45%--36 of 233 votes)

*= Michal Kempny and Nicklas Backstrom tied for fourth hottest.

Write-ins

“literally no one, i s2g if i see anyone say ovi is attractive..... jfc god help them” [.... but ovi is dad-hot, also he got 3 votes]

“YOUR STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS! Everyone btw just a hot team of hot ugly men and Tom Wilson” [kskdjskdjksks]

“my sweaty swedish sweetheart; Nicklas Backstrom” [I’m too illiterate to read this right the first time thru lol]

Colorado Avalanche

Gabe Landeskog ( 55.95%--127 of 227 votes)

Other* (22.47%--51 of 227 votes)

Erik “Horsegirl” Johnson (14.1%--32 of 227 votes)

Mikko Rantanen (7.49%--17 of 227 votes)

*= Tyson Barrie won by more than double of all the other write-ins, but honorable mentions go to Nate MacK, Colin Wilson, Tyson Jost, Phillip Grubauer, and The Avs Tumblr People.

Write-ins - I (jokingly) got called bitch so much in these write-ins, y’all feel some type of WAY about this team lmfao.

“but also the tysons. i would buy a whole farm just so those boys could plow me into the ground.” [i’m SCREECHING. this killed me lol]

“only attractive b/c of his proximity to horses? maybe so.” [.... girl what]

Okay, so instead of a third quote, cause I couldn’t pick, I’m gonna put all the other funny EJ comments I was contemplating:

“ej is soooo ugly in the hottest way possible”

“erik "big horny" johnson”

“oh my god Ej was included for once I'm weeping tears of joy”

“What that mouth do EJ?”

New Jersey Devils

Miles Wood (36.12%--82 of 227 votes)

Taylor Hall (33.48%--76 of 227 votes)

Brian Boyle (19.82%--45 of 227 votes)

Other* (10.57%--24 of 227 votes)

*= Nico Hischier with the majority of the write-ins, even tho he’s still a CHILD (under 20).

Write-ins, aka Mostly Taylor Hall Commentary.

“Does Michael McLeod count” [YES girl i love that boy]

“Gucciiiiiii”

“DSL GUCCI”

“Nico Hischier (Taylor Hall I still love you)”

“i chose taylor and i don’t even need a gucci purse”

“If Taylor Hall gave me a Gucci purse I'd vote for him”

“catch me w/ a gucci purse, girl!!!! for real tho miles wood”

Dallas Stars

DISCLAIMER: I mean no disrespect to Katie, she’s fab and I made this survey a month or so ago. If you don’t know what I mean by this--do not ask me, I will delete the message. Thank you!

Tyler Seguin (46.96%--108 of 230 votes)

Katie Hoaldridge (im gay) (35.22%--81 of 230 votes)

Other* (13.91%--32 of 230 votes)

Stephen Johns (3.91%--9 of 230 votes)

*= Jamie Benn.

Write-ins

“tyler seguin has no upper lip” [I screamed, not exaggerating]

“You have to choose [Seguin] but I do so under duress”

“Im gay too” [hell yeah, this is a mlm and wlw friendly survey!]

Edmonton Oilers

Jujhar Khaira (28.57%--64 of 224 votes)

Other* (27.68%--62 of 224 votes)

Contract McMoney (he is hot) (25.89%--58 of 224 votes)

Darnell Nurse (17.86%--40 of 224 votes)

*= Leon Draisaitl won by more than 5 times anyone elses write-in lmao.

Write-ins ft. “The Draisaitl Quotes”

“McMoney’s money- just his money” [lmao ok sammie, HE’S HOT!]

“cannot mcwingames went off in the gq shoot i admit” [*annie voice* OHMYGOD]

“He’s [Khaira] like a romance novel cover like, f me” [tru]

Drai Quotes

“Drai but like lucic cause Momma needs a man that could kill me” [HDGFDHDGFHDH]

“leon dreisetl (is that his name, is this how you spell it?)”

“Leon Draisaitl and his contract that he doesn't deserve” [backhanded compliment lmao]

“the one w the longass name. dry saitl or whatever” [girl. lmfao]

Winnipeg Jets

Jets/laine fans are funny so I’m adding all the funniest ones instead of just 3 or 5. Sorryyyyyy I’m here to entertain.

Blake Wheeler (44.04%--96 of 218 votes)

Mathieu Perreault (but specifically in his newest headshot) (21.56%--47 of 218 votes)

Other* (19.27%--42 of 218 votes)

Connor Hellebuyck (15.14%--33 of 218 votes)

*= Patrik Laine, even tho I said NOT TO, demons.

Write-ins

“Their logo so I can fly away from this stupid team”

“Nobody but I just needed to point out Connor Hellebuyck looks like a stage magician and that is Not Hot” [i respectfully disagree with the last bit but the first parts made me snort]

“I don't know who windy pegg is”

“Boeing 747″ [sjdjsljlshgdu]

“they’re all second to jacob trouba’s dog Donnie”

“Patty Laine, but like, without the demon beard”

“Let me live my life! Laine has a good voice and i have a LANGUAGE KINK!”

“Laine WITH the beard because I don't fear death”

“Sorry, Laine but only with his beard” [I love the halfhearted apology]

“Goatboi”

“ALL HAIL THE GOAT DEVIL”

“laine come at me bitch lol” [denny’s parking lot. 3 am. be there.]

“laine looks like a goat”

“Laine’s Beard”

“LAINE I like the beard but hockey Satan is good to hellebuyck” [I really felt like I was tripping balls while reading all these but, ESPECIALLY this one lmfao]

Arizona Coyotes

Oliver Ekman-Larsson (30.32%--67 of 221 votes)

Jakob Chychrun (28.05%--62 of 221 votes)

Dylan Strome (26.24%--58 of 221 votes)

Other* (15.38%--34 of 221 votes)

*= Alex Galchenyuk, with the majority of the votes.

Write-ins

“pls date me Chych” [annie, that’s my BF!]

“ 🐼 there is no raccoon emoji >:(”

“[Chychrun] [a]lso has a vampire quality but like trust fund baby vampire who has no morals. I’m...into it??” 

Honorable mentions: The 2 people who put Biz lmaoooo I love yall.

Carolina Hurricanes

Andrei Svechnikov [he’s a baby but I didn’t know who elseeee] (38.29%--85 of 222 votes)

Haydn Fleury (35.59%--79 of 222 votes)

Other* (15.77%--35 of 222 votes)

Dougie Hamilton (10.36%--23 of 222 votes)

*= Sebastian Aho wins the write-in vote [he ain’t it!]

Write-ins

“Justin Faulk (I’m old so svechnikov is out)” [ugh ur right I didn’t make this more inclusive to people not my age, i’m (genuinely) sorry!!!]

“Formerly Eric ‘the hottest Staal' Staal” [only on the cane’s write-in would I have this happen...]

“[Jordan] staal terrifies me but that's hot” [true!]

San Jose Sharks

Erik Karlsson (70.04%--159 of 227 votes)

Martin Jones (17.62%-- 40 of 227 votes)

Other* (11.01%--25 of 227 votes)

Justin Braun (idk) (1.32%--3 of 227 votes)

*= Inconclusive results.

Write-ins

“Daddy shark (doo doo doo)” [just so yall know this is, of course, annie, as in anzekopistar, an actual demon, she’s talking about Erik Karlsson :)]

“Brent Burns, you know im right” [are you tho?]

“Okay sometimes I have needs I think Joe Thorton sans beard could fill” [this is why joe shaved. he felt this person in the universe wanting him to, so he did, wow thank u joe]

Ottawa Senators (lol)

Matt Duchene (33.63%--75 of 223 votes)

The entire team (cause they’re a dumpster fire) (30.94%-- 69 [it’s that tkachuk fuckboi energy] of 223 votes)

Other (there are none)* (22.87%--51 of 223 votes)

Spartacat (12.56%--28 of 223 votes)

*= Inconclusive results (because a lot of you took my “there are none” joke a little too seriously and just chose that, no write-in lmao)

Write-ins

“[about Duchene] he's traitorous but it's like that sometimes i guess” [sjdhdjfhkdhf girl it’s okay.]

“.... we're a team“ [i-]

“the senator on their jerseys is p cute ig”

Bonus:

“oh so spartacat is an option but not gritty huh” [LISTEN the flyers are a HOT team, the sens are NOT. that’s why lmao]

“Just based on headshots I’m going with Ben Sexton like also how do you go wrong with that name”

Tampa Bay Lightning

Brayden Point (55.25%--121 of 219 votes)

Other* (22.83%--50 of 219 votes)

Mitchell Stephens (11.87%--26 of 219 votes)

Steve Yzerman (10.05%--22 of 219 votes)

*= Inconclusive results. Although there were a lot of responses none of them added up significantly sooo....

 Write-ins

“am i the only one who thinks stevie y was a bit of a twink when he was younger?” [jdhslihdalskdjefh]

“Worst team in the league i hate them and theyre all hideous” [u sure bout that, bud?]

“Stamkos (I love his tiny eyes)” [????]

Florida Panthers

 Aaron Ekblad (71.75%--160 of 223 votes)

Aleksander Barkov [r yall ok???] (11.66%--26 of 223 votes)

Other* (10.31%--23 of 223 votes)

Vincent Trocheck (6.28%--14 of 223 votes)

*= Inconclusive results.

Write-ins

“who are the panthers” [sometimes a team is a dog captain, a(n extremely hot) 27-year-old lawyer, and not owen tippett because the panthers hate me specifically]

“Roberto Luongo during Parkland speech” [... valid]

“barkov is literally the only player i know on this team” [shey would be happy to teach u about the panthers!]

Anaheim Ducks

Adam Henrique (52.47%--117 of 223 votes)

No one else (29.6%--66 of 223 votes)

Other* (10.76%--24 of 223 votes)

John Gibson (7.17%--16 of 223 votes)

*=Inconclusive results.

Write-ins-Ducks fans don’t @ me but i’m pretty sure half of these were submitted by y’all anyways....

“if i look @ anyone on the ducks roster for more than 5 seconds i BLACK OUT” [KSHDGJDHSKH Adam tho....]

“Quack Quack go lay your eggs somewhere else you feathered FUCKS” [sjdjfhdjsksj]

“legal 2 say kesler?” [no. go to jail]

Bonus

“Henrique is fine I have no qualms about your selections” [thnk u]

“jared coreau!!! GOOGLE HIM i’m right” [I said this, and we’ve talked, but I need people to know that I, after seeing this, subsequently found out that the Wings didn’t sign coreau back this offszn lmao] 

Nashville Predators

Roman Josi (39.39%--91 of 231 votes)

PK Subban (37.66%--87 of 231 votes)

Kevin Fiala (13.42%--31 of 231 votes)

Other* (9.52%--22 of 231 votes)

*= Pekka Rinne for 4th hottest. [My mom loves him for his name lol. she says it’s “fun”]

Write-ins 

“pk wears cool hats. I like that in a man”

“I don't find any of them hot (Josi used too be hot and then I learned he was illiterate and now I feel nothing but pity towards him)” [GIRL]

“preds are also ugly. pk subban would be attractive if he werent a pred” [lmao. what’d they do to u ?]

Columbus Blue Jackets

Pierre-Luc Dubois (50.22%--113 of 225 votes)

Zach Werenski (20.44%--46 of 225 votes)

Josh Anderson (16.89%--38 of 225 votes)

Other* (12.44%--28 of 225 votes)

*= Alex Wennberg is 4th hottest [lmao]

Write-ins

“Can I put werenskie and Anthony Duclair” [valid]

“Just to be clear CBJ is by far the hottest team exemplified by the fact that you left Seth Jones and Alexander Wenneberg off this list when they're like top 20 in hotness. Also Nick Foligino wins if we include looks and personality.” [I didn’t include them cause this is a mix of hot and ugly hot fam, the avs are 100% the hottest team in the NHL, and that’s coming from me, a Wings fan, destined to hate the Avs for my entire life. Also???? The hotter Foligno is def Marcus lmao]

“[About Werenski] only with the scar though otherwise seth jones” [GIRL scars don’t disappear??? WDYM only with the scar??? Are you a time traveler??? lmfaooo]

Minnesota Wild

J.T. Brown (46.46%--105 of 226 votes)

Other* (21.68%--49 of 226 votes)

Eric Staal (20.80%--47 of 226 votes)

Jason Zucker (11.06%--25 of 226 votes)

*= Charlie Coyle. Honorable mentions to Zach Parise and Matt Dumba.

Write-ins

“Charlie Coyle man! V hot, could kill you, gently waves at babies, 10/10″ [exactly my type! wow]

“ Not JT[,] Lexi is the hottest[,] Eric Staal from a few years ago is also hot” [I added commas to your thing cause.... girl it took me a sec to understand what u were tryna say. But also ur right it’s Lexi.]

“love a #wokebae jt” [yaaas]

FINALLY this legit took me like 10+ hours of work cause I had to transcribe all the info cohesively and then go thru all the responses lmao.

Vegas Golden Knights

William Karlsson (40.52%--94 of 232 votes)

Marc-Andre Fleury (30.60%--71 of 232 votes)

Max Pacioretty (16.81%--39 of 232 votes)

Other* (12.07%--28 of 232 votes)

*= Inconclusive results.

Write-ins

“[Karlsson] because he looks like young Bill from Mamma Mia” [shfhdjdhf girl]

“fleury isn't hot you absolute monster” [???????? drink ur bitterness tea somewhere else pls]

“let's find out just how wild this boy is” [pftd dtduftdhjfgdjfghdjf]

Bonus/Honorable mentions:

The TWO people who put “colin miller’s eyelashes” lmfaoooo

Alrighty this is The End! If you’d like to see another survey by me let me know in my messages/ask!!! Also sorry for stealing de la Rose from u, habs fans

[singingunderthecurtain]

The Eve [I]

Pic not mine, found it on google.

Author: @loeyeolty and @julietsoddeye (smut) AU: Canon Genre: Crack | Smut | Angst Pairing: Chanyeol x OC x Kris  Trigger Warning: Some swearing, Angst, Smut and jokes. Word Count: 5,336

MINI MASTERLIST

Plot: Your best friend, Chanyeol, drunkenly confessed to you. What would you do? 

Another collaborative work!!! We used my OC Amano Hisako and Liu Yanmei from the Diamond universe, but this is a completely different universe lmfao. Diamond was CEO!AU, while this is Canon.

“Chan can you drive yourself home?” you handed over his car keys, which he took without any hesitation.

“Of course! I’m a fucking expert driver. Watch me!” Seeing Chanyeol get inside the Driver’s seat was a pain to watch, he almost tumbled down in several attempts.

While he successfully inserted the key and started the car, Chanyeol’s head fell face flat on the wheel. Squishing the horn, making a nonstop beep.

You pulled Chanyeol back, cupping his cheeks, “Chan, how many hours do you need to sober up?” Your best friend actually looks really cute with his face smushed up like that.

“Sobering up is easy, healing my heart is not,” he wailed.

“Hyung, when I saw them together I felt like my heart was being pounded into pieces.”

“Joy and who?” you released him, laying his head on the headrest.

“Joy who? I was over that heartless bitch ages ago. Hyung, Kris is dating Hisako. I thought she was my best friend. I, of all people, should know first. I should be her first!” He pounded his fists again on the horn.

It’s almost 5 am and your pre-work morning yoga is being interrupted by a flurry of missed calls from MQ.

“You’re awake? Good. Please come over asap, Chan doesn’t look too good.”

MQ's voice was not exactly the best thing to hear in the morning.

“Why what’s up?”

“So we drank last night, he wanting to get over some mumbling girl named Joy. I went out to pee, then I came back and he passed out all over our table.”

“So? Bring him home then?”

You scratched your head in annoyance. MQ disturbed your dead man’s pose.

“I would if I did not have to catch a flight in like 3 hours. See you here at Itaewon.”

he hung up.

As much as you hated MQ, he was your best friend’s best friend after all. And your best friend Chanyeol is needing your help. It's not as if he always asks for your help in drunken situations. Chanyeol was usually a responsible drinker. For him to be unconscious, that girl Joy must have wrecked his heart.

'Fine.' You mouthed to yourself, grabbed a huge coat over your work out tank and yoga pants, and booked an Uber to Itaewon.

“This is our situation.”

MQ greets you at the door of the samgyupsal grill. Pointing at a half-lidded Chanyeol who was groaning with his head glued to the table. He was pressing a lettuce on his ear, in a drunken stupor.

“Actually, this is YOUR situation.” With much emphasis on your,

“So do we hail a cab or what?” you remove the lettuce from his gigantic ears and try to pry him off the table.

“Uh no. Got to go! Here are his car keys.”

In a swift motion, MQ dropped Chanyeol’s Benz keys in front of you on the grill table and made a mad dash towards the exit. Ignoring your screams of 'MQ come back', 'MQ you asshole'. You were sure he didn’t see your flipped middle fingers as well.

“Shit. Chan, get up,”

You tried lifting the tall man from the table, whilst stuffing the keys in your coat. He was still half awake, so you grasp his arm and pull it over your shoulders, forcing him to stand up.

Despite the fact that he was way taller than you. His heavy brown curls rested on your head, putting half of his weight on you.

“MQ you look like a girl, you look pretty now,” he slurred with a smirk.

“It’s because MQ did a sex change for you,” you joked as you guided Chanyeol to the dark parking lot.

“I’m only saying this because I’m drunk and I will regret it but, if you looked like that Hyung, I'd fucking marry you.” Chanyeol slid himself off your grasp, upon reaching his SUV.

“Chan, that’s gay.” You continued to pretend to be MQ, and he doesn’t seem to get the clue.

“Chan can you drive yourself home?” you handed over his car keys, which he took without any hesitation.

“Of course! I’m a fucking expert driver. Watch me!” Seeing Chanyeol get inside the Driver’s seat was a pain to watch, he almost tumbled down in several attempts.

While he successfully inserted the key and started the car, Chanyeol’s head fell face flat on the wheel. Squishing the horn, making a nonstop beep.

You pulled Chanyeol back, cupping his cheeks, “Chan, how many hours do you need to sober up?” Your best friend actually looks really cute with his face smushed up like that.

“Sobering up is easy, healing my heart is not,” he wailed.

“Hyung, when I saw them together I felt like my heart was being pounded into pieces.”

“Joy and who?” you released him, laying his head on the headrest.

“Joy who? I was over that heartless bitch ages ago. Hyung, Kris is dating Hisako. I thought she was my best friend. I, of all people, should know first. I should be her first!” He pounded his fists again on the horn.

You felt frozen in your seat. How did he know? You and Kris have tried to keep things low key.

“I thought I had a chance with her, then I caught Kris leaving her apartment yesterday.” a tear rolled down his impeccably soft cheek.

It never really occurred to you that this guy may actually like you. He always just asked you for advice, of his new flavor of the month, recently Joy. You told him to stop being a fuckboy, and he actually got mad. Really? If bringing home a different girl every month is not the definition of a fuckboy, then what is?

You had thought that being the only constant go-to girl in this life. Albeit platonic, he would come to his senses one day. Until Kris came: he was loyal, sweet and caring. He assured you that you were the only girl in his life. Week after week, you were the only girl he was with. For the first time, you felt like a woman, he treated you like one.

“Hyung,” a lone tear rolled down Chanyeol’s cheeks, yet his nose was clogging up,

“I don’t know what to do with these flowers,” he points at some wrapped up items at the back of his car.

“They’re rotting, take them home. I can’t bring them to her.”

You take a glimpse of the foul-smelling, brown and faded roses, in a disordered array at the back. There was also a stuffed toy of a huge Neko Atsume, stained with the withering roses.

“Nice cat,” was all you could mouth. Your hands were shaking in guilt, confusion, and anger. You were too late Chanyeol, too late.

“I was planning to give that to her, but I can’t bear the fact that Kris is probably fucking her right now. And she’s begging him to take hi--” Chanyeol clenched his hands on his jeans, almost ripping up at the seam in the process.

“Stop.” you placed a gentle hand on his,

“I’m sorry Chan, I’m sorry for your pain.” Yet there was a pang in your heart, thinking of what could have been.

“I’ll drive you home,” you instructed him to switch seats. Like an obedient kid, Chanyeol climbed up to the passenger seat and wiped away his snot.

“Thanks, Hyung.”

You drove Chanyeol home. And upon arriving at his pad, the sun was starting to break, sky changing colors from black to orange and then blue.

“Thank you,” he murmured in his drunken state, his head resting on the window.

“Hisako and I used to go on drives, we would switch driving. I miss her.” he gathers a handful of his hair and tugs it.

Chanyeol’s words twist a knot in your heart. But you are already committed to Kris. Chanyeol has been stringing you along for years after all. Who knows when he will change? Out of friendship, you help him get inside his apartment studio. Wherein the giant swoops down on his couch.

6AM. You will be late, but you feel compelled to give him an explanation at the very least. You nudge Chanyeol, whose face is all reddened up, to his side, and calmly clasps his cold icy hands in your warm ones.

“Hisa--ko..?” He finally recognizes you, as daylight broke.

“Chan, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hide it from you, but I’m seeing a guy named Kris. He’s really kind. As my best friend, you should know.”

Chanyeol swallows a heavy gulp, you gaze at his eyes, seeing a glint of pain and betrayal.

“Also, I can’t do this anymore. I can’t keep fetching you whenever you’re drunk, or always available at your whim. It would be unfair to Kris, I’m sorry.” you felt that his hands were prying away from you, so you let him go.

“What does he have that I don’t?” Chanyeol sniffles, and tries to sit up, scrubbing his giant hands for heat and places them over his face. You lend your hands to his cold ears too, but he swats them off.

“Don’t touch me, just answer me!”

“He actually had the courage to tell me that he likes me, and me alone.”

The words that you have always been wanting to tell Chanyeol, over the past few years. Came hurling out like a snowball.

“He doesn’t sleep around, and he doesn’t beat around the bush.”

“I like you too Hisako.” his expression changed from flushed to stern and serious.

“But you didn’t give me a chance... if only that fucking giant didn’t beat me to it. I would have...” his eyes were begging with compassion.

“Careful, that fucking giant is my boyfriend.” you felt a bit defensive of Kris, yet at the back of your head, you have always wanted the boy in front of you, over these years.

He envelops you in a warm embrace,

 “I hate myself. I lost my best friend. I lost the love of my life. Please let me win her back.”

You hug him back,

“This isn’t goodbye. We are still friends Chanyeol. You could still talk to me about your latest, uhm, chick.” You pat his arm, asking for release.

Stab me right in the heart, don’t you?” he was still unwilling to let go.

“You know how to stab mine too. It used to hurt me a lot seeing you with a new chick every month. But now, I’m okay.” You push yourself away from him.

Standing up, you ruffle his hair.

“I wish you the best with, uhm, I really can’t remember the name of your latest one.”

“Neither do I. They don’t matter. Only you, matter.” Chanyeol looks up to you, laughing. but his eyes as if begging you not to go.

But you had already made up your mind,

“Why are you so cheesy? This is not the Chanyeol I know.” you giggle to shake your tension away.

As your heel prepared to leave, Chanyeol walked you to the door. With his towering height, he whispers in your ear,

“I’m going to win you back. Just you see.”

“I wish you happiness, my dear friend.” You gave him a sincere smile, as you shut the door behind you because finally, you were free from him.

Or are you?

------

“I’m going to win you back. Just you see.”

My ass. Chanyeol’s words hover over your head like Blanche. You weren’t sure if it was a blessing or a curse that Your Best Friend made zero contact with you over the past 6 months.

Not that you were expecting any action from him anyway. At least you know that you made the right choice: Kris. And you were able to spend uninterrupted time with your boyfriend.

He was exactly your type: tall, funny and sweet. The same points that made you attracted to Chanyeol, yet he was the committal type. If Kris didn’t have schedules that needed him going back and forth to China, he would have been the perfect one.

But what even bothers you is that even his asshole friend MQ stopped contacting you. It’s like Chanyeol has imposed a permanent ban on you perhaps. The most news you could get about him was through official news sites, just like a regular fan.

November-- the perfect weather. It wasn’t too hot, nor too cold, and you could catch a glimpse of the first snow. You enjoyed staying in bed with Kris, who just came home from China last night. Snuggling under the comforters.

You sneaked out of the bed in your tank top and underwear, made a simple breakfast of egg and toast for your lover. And tiptoed back to the room.

Expecting that you will still find his gorgeous form asleep. But you're surprised to find him awake, scrolling on his phone.

Setting down the breakfast tray on Kris’ lap, you join him on the bed. “What you doing Baby?” You trail kisses on his bare shoulder.

“Wow, Chanyeol seems to have hit the jackpot. Careerwise. Look,” Kris shows you his phone screen

“He now writes songs for Exo. And this song Heaven is said to have been staying longer in the charts, months even after its release.”

“Great for him,” you grab a piece of toast and offer Kris a bite.

“I’m curious. How come I never saw him? I’ve met Yanmei and the others. I kinda wanna see him since we last saw each other was in 2014..” Kris nibbles on the toast, while grabbing your waist with his free hand. Pulling you closer to him.

One of the things you loved about Kris was how you can rest your head on his shoulder and feel totally secure. But this time, talking about Chanyeol made you feel uncomfortable.

“I guess he’s just busy.”

“Invite him over. I wanna see him for old time’s sake. I wanted to throw a small advanced birthday party before I go back to China next week. Heck, he can even invite Baekhyun or Sehun.”

He nuzzles his chin on the top of your head. You know he meant to be romantic but his pointed chin hurt your scalp.

“I’m bad at organizing things Kris, I’ll just give you his number. Up to you.”

You didn’t want to go against his wishes. But you didn’t want to see Chanyeol as well. Not after that, he didn't live up to his promises..not that you were expecting.

---

Thankfully, days has passed and you didn’t hear from Kris of any positive reply from Chanyeol.

On Kris’ last day, November 3, you had decorated your living room with balloons. Prepared some Red Wine and bought a kinky cake with an outlandishly pink nipples design. Sexting the boyfriend, who was out meeting out with some old friends. 'I can’t wait to celebrate your birthday in advance tonight. I want your juice.' That sounded a bit, weird but whatever. You had hit send.

Disappointment crept up your face when he did not reply. Damn, time for Plan B. You took out the lingerie you had been reserving for special occasions. Red leather underwear and red nipple tassels. The weather was chilly so you wore a tan coat over it while waiting for Kris to come home.

Finally, your phone beeped, receiving a measly lame reply from Kris. 'Great. Bought some pineapple juice. Coming home in 5.'

You weren’t sure if he understood that you were wanting him tonight but at least he’s coming home.

A mere soft knock on the door made you jump in anticipation, still clad in your tan coat. But opening the door sent chills down your spine.

It was Kris.

But with an equally tall guy behind him.

His hair was red tinged with black roots and pushed back. And still in his perpetual black shorts and Adidas hoodie.

And here you were, almost naked beneath your tan coat.

Feigning warmness and friendliness,

“Babe!” You kissed Kris on the lips before giving Chanyeol a friendly hug. His body pressing onto you, making you feel the hardness of your tassels on your chest. You pray that he did not feel that.

But the smirk on his face after your release from the hug indicates otherwise.

“Oh, Hisako you prepared all this for me?” Kris covered his mouth, astounded with all the preparations. But one thing you did not expect was visitors, hence the boob cake laid out for both the tall guys to see.

“That cake is amazing but I don’t want the fake thing,” Kris comes towards you, giving you a squeeze on your waist. You blush, feeling hot at his words.

Chanyeol stood there, awkwardly watching the two of you, as he cleared his throat.

“I did not know you were coming,” you asked him to sit down on the couch.

“He accepted my invite, last minute,” Another knock on the door and Kris was quick on his toes to receive the guest.

A loud mouthed boy had entered your ruined sexy birthday party

“Hisako!!! Long time no see!!” He immediately takes you in a tight hug. And without any filter, he comments,

“Woah, I think you have some card boards on your chest--” to which he stops and stares at you.

“Oh sorry, for Kris right? Kris, you lucky son of a bitch!”

“What? Babe, it's hot, it's okay to take off your coat,” Kris genuinely, out of concern, asks you to.

“No, I’m okay.” Your body has weird ways of not cooperating. Instead of feeling embarrassed, your tits started feeling hard instead.

“I just, came home from work, I need to change..” you excused yourself to your room.

But in earshot you can hear Baekhyun “Hyung, she’s wearing lingerie. Nipple Tassels I think.” And breaks into solo laughter.

You quickly change into a floral dress, with a fairly decent neckline cut. Enough to show some skin, and enough to elicit inappropriate comments from Baekhyun.

“Kris Hyung, I knew you’d be the luckiest among us,” with him blatantly staring at your chest.

“I know. I am.” Kris sits beside you on the sofa, across Baekhyun and Chanyeol who were chugging on some soju shots.

“How about you Baekhyun, seeing anyone? Taeyeon?” Kris asks. You glance at him and he seems seriously happy to be reunited with his buddies.

“Ah. I learned my lesson.” He coyly answers.

“You should ask Chanyeollie he’s the player!” Baekhyun’s comment merited him a nudge to the rib by the man in the hoodie.

“Seeing anyone Chanyeol? Last time I left you were still dating that trainee Joy..” Kris innocently asks. There seems to be no trace of awkwardness or jealousy on his face. As Kris starts to not so subtly, trace his hand inside the hem of your skirt, rubbing your thighs.

“None. I have decided to focus on my career, producing songs, song writing.” He cockily answers, and Baekhyun nods in agreement.

“I don’t know what got over Chanyeollie. But he completely stopped fucking around earlier this year. I asked him how did you stop? Are you turning into a priest?” Baekhyun slaps his thighs in his own joke.

“But he just told me, sometimes the player thinks he’s just playing but he eventually loses the game. And I’m like, who the hell made you like this?” The smaller man continues to chatter.

“Yeah, I’m like who the hell made me like this?” Chanyeol retorts, raising a brow at you.

You try to slow down Kris’ aggressive hand up your thigh, and Chanyeol was clearly seeing what you two were doing.

“So who’s this girl who broke Chanyeol?” Kris put a pillow on your lap to hide his doings.

“It’s always the nice girls who play badly.” Chanyeol fixes his eyes on you.

“Yeah like Taeyeon,” Baekhyun adds.

“They lure you in then they suddenly crush you without warning.” Chanyeol continues.

“Amen. Hisako, maybe you have friends as nice as you we can introduce to them?” Kris’ rubbing on your knee intensifies, leaving you flushed.

“Male or Female?”

Your question triggers Baekhyun, standing up, putting both of his hands on his own waist.

“Ya. You’ve seen me and Chanyeol with a lot of girls and you still accuse me as gay?”

Kris snaps the garter of your panties, leaving you weak, your

“Noo..” was almost a moan.

“But of course, I like women, but I only have a specific type,” Chanyeol laughs, motioning Baekhyun to sit down.

“What type?” With Kris’ fingers inside your underwear you know you weren’t going to last long. You pinched Kris’ arm. But you still managed to ask Chanyeol that question.

“You know exactly my type, Hisako.” Chanyeol grins.

“Oh shit. My Chicken is burning.” You stood up, pillow falling to the ground.

“I’ll help.” Kris followed you.

But there was no chicken.

You did not cook anything up.

And the kitchen was on the other side.

But walked towards the bedroom.

Seeing Kris enter the room as well.

“Let’s be quick.” With hungry eyes, you closed the door and pinned Kris on the wall.

“Scream as much as you can, I want those fuckers to hear it.” He commanded.

As Kris starts peeling your dress off your body, he simultaneously turns you over. And your left cheek and chest hit the wooden door with a loud thud. You heard muffled sounds of two sets of feet shuffling from the other side.

“What was that? Are they having a fight or something?” Baekhyun asks loudly and Chanyeol hits him on the chest rather roughly.

“Shut the fuck up!” Chanyeol whispers loudly with a slight scowl on his face. He situates his big ear on the door to have a better heed of what’s happening inside. Baekhyun following suite of what his friend did.

“Mmm so wet and needy for me already.” Kris roars out as he rubs 2 fingers on your heat roughly, your back arches and you felt him already hard on your ass. Kris’ left hand is securely wrapped around your nape, pinning your head on the side to the door so you won’t get to move.

“Daddy please stop teasing and just fuck me already.” You gyrate your ass on his boner making your giant of a boyfriend growl with delight. And the razing of his fingers on your clit accelerated. Your legs wobbled when you felt the buzz drawing close. You held onto the towel rack that was flimsily nailed on the door directly above your head. Praying to the heavens above it won’t break and cause an injury to the both of you.

“Fuck! Daddy, please don’t stop! I’m very close!” Baekhyun slaps his mouth shut with his hands to stop himself from making any noise. When he heard you howl in pleasure. Chanyeol removes his ear on the door frame as he swallows the lump that formed in his throat. His cheeks flushed with anger, it should be him who is making you moan, not Kris, he thinks to himself.

“Be a good girl and don’t cum until I’m inside of you.” Kris snarls at your ear. His tight grip on your nape loosened and he pulls down your underwear just enough for him to take you from behind.

“This is so fucking awesome!” Baekhyun mouths as he snickers silently, fishing for his phone from his jean pocket.

“What are you doing?” Chanyeol’s eyes widen when he saw Baekhyun pressing his phone back to life.

“I’m gonna record this so the rest can hear.” Baekhyun tried tapping the audio recording app, but Chanyeol snatches his phone away.

“I will fuck up our bedroom and I will blame it on you so that Kyungsoo will finally kill you for real this time!” Chanyeol whispers fiercely through gritted teeth.

“Fine, fine! I won’t. Fuck Chanyeol, why are you so mad?” Baekhyun snatches his phone back and secures the device back inside his pocket.

“OH MY GOD DADDY YOU’RE TOO BIG!” You cry out when Kris suddenly ram his dick inside of you without any warning, whatsoever. He immediately starts thrusting in and out of you hard and fast, not even giving you time to adjust to his size.

“Are you hearing this right now?!” Baekhyun mouths silently to Chanyeol again, his eyes the size of the moon. Chanyeol wanted to kick the door down so he can stop the lecherous acts you’re doing with Kris. But he knows he doesn’t have the right to since he started ignoring you 6 months ago.

“Fuck… fuck… fuck.” Kris keeps cursing like a sailor when you clenched your walls around him. This is the only way you know that will make him cum faster, so you can both climax together.

“Oh God! I’m almost there Kris, don’t stop, please don’t stop!” You scream out loud, and with that Kris thrusts harder and faster. The banging of the door getting heavier and heavier on every single pounding. You’re sure your bedroom door will be trashed by the time you finish.

“Fuck! you’re so fucking tight Hisako.” Kris yowls even louder than you. Chanyeol’s fist balled up with anger. He doesn’t wanna hear this shit anymore but he literally can’t move away as his feet grew imaginary roots to the ground.

After a few more hard thrash, you finally came and fell apart. Kris didn’t stop his ravage, chasing his own release. With the overstimulation, your grip on the towel bars became flaccid. And Kris tightened his hold around your body before you can even let go of the handlebars completely.

“Oh, baby girl… Fuck....” And just like that, you felt his hot seed burst out and your head whirl as you are overfucked once again.

Kris pushes you up against the flat door with a bang, and finally sealing in the deed with a sloppy kiss to your mouth. “Happy birthday Baby..”

“Hisako, you’re the best birthday gift ever..” Kris lets go of you, leaving your legs numb in the euphoric state you were in. After zipping up his jeans, he graciously helps you get in your dress. He handed you a Kleenex, but before you could even wipe yourself. Nor find your discarded underwear, a loud thud outside was heard.

“Chanyeol!” A worried Baekhyun screams nearby.

“What’s happening?” Kris spontaneously opens your bedroom door. The sounds of crashing plates and series of thundering sounds ensues.

In a hurry, the both of you rush to a panic-stricken Baekhyun grappling a furious Chanyeol from behind.

“Cha-Chanyeol, lets go!” Baekhyun restrained Chanyeol’s hands. Yet he managed to throw the kinky cake off the table, stomping on it as it hits the floor. You scan your surroundings. Your favorite China plate has crashed on the floor as well some of the birthday decorations.

“Chanyeol I don’t know what’s wrong but you better stop before I call the cops.” Kris took a protective stance and hid you behind him.

“Chanyeol..” his raged composure was broken by your soft voice. He looks at you with much betrayal in his eyes. More anger built up on his chest as he saw Kris’ residual juice trickle visibly down your leg. He just could not look, it was killing him, and taking control. Jealousy turns saints into the sea. Clenching his fists, and his ears turning a deep shade of scarlet. Chanyeol knew he was not in the position to be mad at Kris, nor be mad at you.

You feel your insides twist with guilt. Could he still be harboring feelings for you despite even after ignoring you for long? It wasn’t your intention nor Kris’ intention to drive Chanyeol to jealousy. The two of you were merely caught in the heat of the moment between two normal lovers. Besides Kris was oblivious. Oblivious to the fact that the other taller man had confessed his feelings to you months ago.

With a deep sigh, Chanyeol flees the apartment, Baekhyun running after him.

Kris stops you from following your friends. Reasoning out that maybe Chanyeol is just upset over something. You just help Kris pack for his red-eye flight.

Picking up the remnants of the ravaged cake and plates, you thought to yourself, How did it end up like this?

[snowfragrance]

California 2017 trip review

I’m back from a vacation in CA! As usual, just going to review the attractions, foods, and accommodations. The main areas will be Anime Expo 2017, downtown LA, and Venice Beach/Santa Monica. First up, Anime Expo...this will be long.

Anime Expo (AX)

This anime con is the biggest in the US. According to their website, this year the attendance for Anime Expo reached 115,726 with all the special shows. Originally, when my peeps were planning CA trip, AX was considered but not set in stone. But then I grabbed discounted 4 day tickets during Black Friday and that’s how we planned our stay in CA. I had decided to not cosplay and enjoy my time at the con but I saw that the weather was in the 70s-80s with no humidity so I packed 2B and wore her for Day 1 and 4.

The Good:

Everything about the Exhibit Hall was amazing. Since it is the biggest con, all the well-known names of anime/video games (Viz, Bandai, Crunchyroll, Blizzard, etc) are there to promote new shows/games, sell official merchandise, sign autographs, and give out freebies (my sister was constantly eating free samples of shrimp chips lol). And so much merch! The guidebook had 5 pages of all the sellers and the entire room took a good 3-4 hours to explore. I usually don’t spend a lot of money buying merch cause I could find cheaper prices online but I left with an empty wallet. There were so many things that you cannot find in the US. The layout of the room is very organized with each booth having a number and ceiling signs above the sections that show the number of each section.  

The artist alley was also massive! Lots of pretty art and I finally picked up a print from an artist that I had been eyeing for a while. Her booth was very popular lol. It took almost 20 minutes to reach her to buy a print. Traffic basically stopped. I was hoping to find more subtle anime prints…like a print with traditional ink calligraphy-ish style for LoL which didn’t happen. I didn’t have enough time to comb through everyone’s booth since I was spending a lot of time in the exhibit hall.

The entertainment hall had the itasha cars, arcade games, and the background sets for pictures. There was also an area that tested out a new tablet thing that made drawing digitally super easy. We also had fun in the background sets.

Badge pickup was ridiculously fast. They started pickup on day -1(?) and 0. It took minutes with no lines.

The guidebook’s map is the best thing ever. It’s organized and easier to read than the map on the app. The staff and volunteers are very helpful and well informed so we didn’t get lost that much. We still did but it wasn’t too much considering it was our first time and the convention center was massive. It’s also really nice how there are always an escalator around because I’m lazy and my vision was impaired when I was cosplaying.

AX provided a free shuttle to transport people to hotels and to the convention center. Using it was confusing and frustrating but it was nice that they had that as an option. Our hostel was only 20 minutes away with walking but catching the shuttle saved us time and energy.

The people who ran the AMV panels were really great. They knew their stuff and kept us entertained. There was no technical difficulties and all the programs started and ended on time.

The cosplays were really why I go to cons. It’s always amazing to see all the details and effort that goes into the costumes! And we were getting all the steps in from running after them! There were so many impressive ones. I’ve noticed a lot of Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid, FFXV, Overwatch, BnHA, Love Live!, Haikyuu, and very surprisingly Yugioh and Berserk were popular. I was expecting more AoT with S2 out or SAO since that’s like the go to cosplay for couples for some reason. There was also not a lot of Doctor Who, Supernatural, Marvel, and DC…I always see a couple of doctors running around in the eastern cons. Also, I saw no dancing which was unusual. In previous cons, there’s always someone who will have a dance battle or sing Disney songs while waiting in line.

The Bad:

The AX app was useless. It was ok to get new updates and to see changes but the map was difficult to navigate. The schedule shows only what the room was called and not where it was located. It would be better to know the actual room number so you know where to find it. I already know it’s a workshop because of the icon near the name so I don’t need to see the room as workshop1…I rather have it as room 404 so that I know I have to go to the 4th floor. Some panels had no summary so I had no idea if I wanted to go.

The bag checks in Day 1 needed to be expanded. Day 1 had a lot of people so it would make sense to have more entrance points. There were only a couple of bag checks so the line was behind and way past the convention center and continued to be long even after the sun was setting. I was kinda dying in my 2B cosplay. Everytime you leave the convention center, you have to go back through bag check. And all the cosplay meetups are held outside. So I noped out on my Nier meetup. And by the time I got settled and stopped oozing everywhere, most of the halls were closing and I missed all the panels I wanted to see. We also decided to have snacks for lunch because all the delicious and decently priced food trucks were outside of the convention center…and no one wanted to wait in line to enter the convention center again.

And speaking of lines, all the lines for normal ticket holders are outside. It’s really annoying to find the lines. I wish they could have the lines inside the building with a staff keeping tabs on how many seats are left. That way, no one gets a heat stroke and lines are easier to find cause it next to the room. The staff can turn away people once the capacity is reached so those people can do other things and not waste their time. It’ll also reduce traffic inside the building. Those who paid more for premium badges get to cut in line which makes attending workshops really difficult. We tried to go to a polymer class only to find all the seats were gone. And apparently, you must sit in a chair to view the panel/workshop. You cannot be standing or hanging out by the door. I don’t really know why this is a rule since it makes no sense

The shuttle location was moved after Day 1 to prevent clogging traffic around the convention center. We went to the new location and boarded without issues. However on the next day, we went to the new location again and found no shuttles even though the service should run 24/7. We called the info desk and got the same directions. We were at the new location but after that we could not find the shuttles again. There had been no other changes regarding location. It was super frustrating.

AX had ticketed events where you have to pay extra to go to. I don’t really care for the concerts or cafes but I was kinda interested in the masquerade. That started at $5 for horrible seats. I know they needed the money to give out cash prizes to the winners but I wasn’t going to be spending a lot of money for good seats.

I wanted to go the Miku 10th Anniversary (oh god, it’s been that long?!) dance but I didn’t do that either. We got in line and had a pretty good spot but then staff came around to tell us that large bags had to be checked and stored away. It seemed like we had to buy a locker for the bags. We had gotten free bags from the exhibit hall so we would have to get those checked and lose our spot. By then, the line already was wrapping around. Ugh, like you could have warned us sooner or have that requirement posted under the dance in the website, app, and/or the event sign by the door. We were waiting for almost an hour before being told this which wasn’t long by con standards but it was still wasted time. Literally everyone had those free bags and after that announcement, it was a mess.

Overall, it was fun and it’ll be my first and probably last AX. My local cons are just as good though I’m going to miss that exhibit hall with all the freebies and merch. I wished I could find something from QZGS but no luck. Here is a pic of my peeps and all my loot.

[lizacstuff]

Anon asks

So as not to clog any of your dashes, fandom wank under the cut

beka1820 @beka1820  I’m confused how she said that TvLine and Deadline contradicted each other and that they’re crazy or whatever. Didn’t they say the same thing essentially. Especially about the specific 4? That whole post would be so entertaining if it wasn’t so insulting to JMo.

I saw that!!  I suppose it exposes her complete lack of reading comprehension? The stories were pretty much identical to me.  

However, she is one of those people who posts something, it turns out to be completely wrong, but then she comes back and says “look how right I was.”

Very Trump-esque. 

Anonymous said:The one thing I’d love to come true from that dumb post is for Jen to be made a producer.

I’m sure the reason that the producer thing is part of this pretend narrative is because it’s kind of an obvious guess at this stage of the game. Often in contract re-negotiations actors get producer credits and JMo is clearly the actor from the show who is the most collaborative with the creatives and she’s also the one who is most interested in things behind the scenes.  It’s not really that bit of a leap.

Also, I think it would be fabulous.

Anonymous said:That post was hilarious! I love how she took Jen’s pics on Instagram as clear signs of her planning to leave. I bet if I had the willpower I could go through Lana’s thousand selfies with her super deep captions and come up with all kinds of “signs” that she’s leaving as well.

Oh that was the best!  However, that fandom in general has been reading “coded” messages that their fanon ship would be “endgame” for years, I suppose it’s not a leap for them to read coded messages sent from actors to networks in random photos. 

Delusional.

And yes a behavioral psychologist could have a field day going through Lana’s feed. Narcissism anyone…

Anonymous said:I stopped reading the Jen hater post when she said Jen would refuse to do any interview with an smaller outlets. We saw her giving interviews to podcasts, youtubers, small websites. So when you detect something you know is a lie, the rest doesn’t even matter.

Exactly! Totally inaccurate. There are so many instances of that. “My sources say” well your sources (voices in her head) assertions are demonstrably false, so WTF are you even talking about?

Anonymous said So is it possible for a certain news person to come up with a load of crap, like pages and pages of bullshit (like that would take a really dumb long time to bullshit up) because they hate a certain actress/character. If so then I 👏👏👏 their dedication to their craft.

I’s astounding. I wonder if there is a Pulitzer Prize for Fandom Dumbfuckery?

Anonymous said:So the troll believes us Colin fans should be worried about the casting of Andrew as a possible regular next season if Colin stays… according to the trolls logic Andrew being a new pretty white face will be the new writers fav so no time for Colin… Lol I just can’t.. how can her followers still believe her crap

Simple, because they want to believe it.  They’ve lost everything.  So they cling to preposterous anti rhetoric that tries to spin everything that happens as bad for CS fans, CS, Hook, Emma, Jen and Colin.

It’s simple.

However, if anyone can’t see through every word and  buys the nonsense hook, line and sinker, then they are a total fucking moron.

Anonymous said:I think I know who that  troll you’ve mentioned is and wow! I read some of their posts and they are so stupid. Apparently JMo’s random innocent Instagram posts are some sort of message to the network! And every single thing Jen does is directly or indirectly meant to pressure the network! Are there people who actually believe this person? Because wow that’s dumb even for a S Qer.

Yep. It also shows how she doesn’t get JMo and doesn’t get how low-profile OUAT is in the “industry.”  Like I said in a previous post, her fatal flaw is she projects her own pompous, pedantic, pretentious, over-investment on to her “sources” and the “industry.”

To hilarious and scary results. 

Anonymous said:Could the troll make it any more obvious that she’s making everything up? I don’t think so.

No. She might as well asterisk everything with “this is total BS and wishful thinking”

Anonymous said:I think the relatively low amount of notes on that “industry sources” post is indicative of how far out of favor the troll has fallen. She’s been off the deep end since 5a, and doubled down on her “efforts” since the engagement ring showed up on Emma’s finger. I think the anti Jmo angle she’s been working for the last week damaged that posts impact; everyone knows she’s just got an axe to grind. I don’t think as many people believe what she says anymore. People don’t trust her.

No one should trust her. They shouldn’t trust what she says publicly and they sure as hell shouldn’t trust what she says privately.  However, at this point if anyone doesn’t have her number… boy I don’t know.

Anonymous said:Oh, is the troll scrambling to save face now that all her assertions that JMO quit appear to be bunk? What is her problem with JMo anyway? She’s been ragging on her for like 3 days now.

JMo doesn’t pander or cater to her sex fantasies by posting selfie’s with Lana so she must be stopped!!!!!! 

Anonymous said:I think my favorite part was when she added a point about Lana having auditioned for some pilots. But apparently turned down offers or something? She knew this back in January but didn’t think it was worth mentioning. Does she have a bingo game set up and whatever it lands on, that’s what those insider (voices in her head) sources tell her to say? Does anyone actually still believe her? I’m almost more concerned for the mental health of those people.

I find it hilarious that anyone believes that Lana was getting her door beaten down during pilot season.  If you believe that I have some beautiful ocean-side property to sell you in Kansas…

Anonymous said: What is the troll’s beef against JMo anyway? Isn’t she the same one who made up those rumors about Sean?

Yup, said troll was ground zero for the false allegations against Sean. 

Anonymous said:Here’s my question about that troll and others like her. There’s actually another fandom I’m in that has a vicious troll spouting off very stupid and even dangerous “insider info” that their followers eat up and take it as gospel. Are these trolls that give out all this bull making it up themselves, or do they actually have someone feeding them this info and they truly believe it is real? I can never tell if they believe it, or just enjoy the lies, attention, and drama they are able to cause.

In this case, I believe this one is making it all up, or with a small cadre of friends. She’s not being fed a line of bull by someone, her track record of lies is too long and deep.  I can’t speak to your other fandom, I guess it depends on how gullible the person seems to you. Because it is common for someone to try and find a puppet to actually put the info out there. This troll tried that with the Sean rumors, under the guise of fandom unity, making friends with CSers, O Qers, R Bers and trying to get them to spread it for her. 

Also this is not unique to OUAT fandom.  It’s happened since the dawn of fandom. People trolling, people pretending to know more than they do. etc. @counttotwenty and I had quite a cabal of false-info and false-spoiler trolls to deal with back in our West Wing fandom days. 

Don’t believe them and don’t believe this troll either.  

[youtubeswarriors-blog]

I AM BACK!!! ^w^

and for all you that don’t really care to read about the weekend I won’t clog up too much of your dash, i’ll just put a pic here and put the rest in a read more, however the people who read more will get to see how much of a meme my sister is ^w^ i love her so much.

here is me with my sissy

and

me in my bridesmaid dress

So, this weekend started off a bit rocky. Just overwhelmed with Wedding and no Wedding things was so incredibly stressful, so it didn’t hit me much that this was actually happening. So the first day we made all the bouquets for the ceremony , then went to rehearsal, which went by really well. Then ,I went back with my sister to sleep over with her (since she was in the bridal suite all alone on her first night). However i didn’t pack everything i needed, including a sleep shirt, luckily my sister had me covered on that. Then me her , her husband to be, and one of his groomsmen all went to the bar in the hotel to get a st Patricks day drink. The lady hard core staired at me and checked my id twice before she took my order. They all got green beer, however i still can’t stand beer so I got a “ Pot of gold “ which was citricy type drink, idk what was in it but it was good. So at 9 me and my sister went back to the room and went to sleep. And i say sleep weakly because i had THE WORSE sleep i’ve ever had. Te main problem being, the place the wedding was held was higher in altitude than where we live, so i couldn’t breath properly, and spent most of the night wide awake in the room.

The big day came and i was still dying because of lack of sleep. However i gathered my things and went back to my house that my parents rented for the weekend, and  got all my stuff together to take over. It’s odd to me that this only happened in a madder of days because it felt like a whole week. Honestly my dad was the most nervous, my sister was a bit nervous after she sliced her finger on her razor but after that she was fine. But my dad was getting very worked up over nothing.  But we knew why he was so nervous and just let him be. We gathered all the things and brought them to the venue. Luckily there were tones of people helping set up, not that there really was too much to set up in the first place. But we got everything squared away and it was onto the makeup and dressing, since we were doing pictures before the ceremony. So we got all pretty, jamming out to 80′s music and we were ready to go, my sisters fiance was about to see her for the first time. We all were so excited to see his reaction, though we had to stay far enough away for the photographer to get the pictures. But we saw him turn around and wipe his eyes and just hug her so tightly, it was so adorable. Then we all took pictures...me the only one in heels was having the most trouble, but we managed and ended up having fun. Then it was time, everyone was here and it was time to do what everyone came here for. We all walked out, out entrance music played (Go the Distance-from Hercules). Then i had to stand there and be ready to take my sisters bouquet when the time came however I also had to watch the communion table, because a strong wind was blowing and it almost knocked it over a couple of times. i only cried a couple times , when they were saying their vows, but it passed. Then when they finally pronounced them husband and wife, the song she chose to go back down the isle to was none other that “accidentally in love” from the 2nd shrek movie XD I was laughing so hard. After we did some more pictures and then....the party!

So they got some old friends to teach everyone swing dancing, so they would be able to dance to it during the party. I snuck in because the bridal party was suppose to be introduced first. But we went and talked to some people , then went to get some wine that they had at the bar. We had to be introduced though after my sister and her husband came back from pictured So we all paired off and we each got introduced, getting to dance to the song “ Verge- by owl city”. It was fantastic. Then my sister and her husband got introduced by the song “ Everything is awesome” Which was THE BEST! Then we ate food and quickly enough, it was my turn to give my speech. I was So nervous but i got through it without dying, and some people laughed, which was good, but then came the best part, the dancing. Now I love dancing however clubs and such are not my thing at all, but when i find the right place, oh i dance. And I was on my 2nd cup of wine so i was beyond ready. So the first song I danced to was a swing song, and the instructor who was doing the swing lessons was an old friend so i got him to dance with me, because anyone who knows about swing, is that it’s all about your partner, and he knew how to lead incredibly well, so i looked friggin incredible out there by doing little to no work XD. I wish I had video because i had people coming up to me after that talking about how amazing I was. But after that it was all single dancing, and I basically danced for 2 hours straight, which I am regretting today. I am SO SORE! However the rest of the wedding was so much fun, I caught the bouquet, purely by accident and I got to dance with my sister and one of my friends late into the night because all the songs were INCREDIBLE! All in all it was such a great day and I had a blast, I’m so glad i was apart of it

[iwrotemywayto-revolution]

There she goes

Request: NOW I NEED MORE!!!! sooo good, can’t wait for another part? part one is here || part three is here

Pairing: Lin-Manuel Miranda x reader

Warnings: Mild angst

Word count: 2,234

A/N: Y/T/N = Your Twitter Name; this skips around in time a little but it shouldn’t be too confusing. If you want to be tagged for the final part, just send me an ask. @fragmentofmymind here you go... part two.

ask box || masterlist

–

You returned to consciousness as if through seaweed-clustered waters. Each step was slow and laborious and threatened to make you fall back into sleep. When you did open your eyes, it was to find yourself cradled in a warm embrace and definitely not lying in your bed.

Lin, you realised and, careful not to wake him, turned your head to look at him. You must have fallen asleep watching the West Wing the night before and, somehow, got tangled up while you slept. Lin was asleep with his mouth open a little and his arms around you. He looked a little less troubled in sleep.

As gently as you could, you slipped out of his arms and got up off the couch. You figured running for it would make the next few days of rehearsal awkward, so you headed into the kitchen and started to make some coffee. You concentrated on finding mugs and figuring out how to work the machine- anything but how much you had liked waking up in Lin’s arms.

“Y/N?” Lin’s voice, still groggy with sleep, interrupted the whir of the machine. You poked your head through the doorway and smiled at him. He was still on the couch, hair ruffled and jumper rucked up a little.

“I’m here,” you said, “and I made coffee.”

He grinned. “You’re the best.”

“I know.” You passed him his coffee, watching him cradle it and sway a little. “We should go soon- it’s nearly eight.”

Lin gave you a plaintive look. “I want to sleep,” he complained, and you laughed.

“You can sleep on me during the lunch break,” you promised, and he got up.

–

Chris wasn’t the only one who raised an eyebrow when you and Lin turned up at rehearsal, you still in your clothes from the day before and Lin looking decidedly rumpled despite his best attempts. “What happened?” Chris asked after Lin had disappeared to find Andy.

“I stayed over,” you said, then groaned at his knowing smirk, “because of the blizzard. Nothing happened.” Chris looked doubtful. “We drank hot chocolate and fell asleep watching the West Wing.”

“He must like you,” Chris marvelled, “the West Wing doesn’t come out unless he likes people.”

You turned to Andréa in the hope of a reprieve, but she looked downright gleeful. “You like him!” she clapped her hands like a giddy school-girl. “I knew it.”

“You’re probably right,” you admitted, thinking of how it had felt to wake up in Lin’s arms, to hear him say your name sleepily when he woke, to leave his apartment together and tease him about him owning Hamilton socks.

“No me diga-” Andréa muttered. “You’re the perfect Vanessa.”

“You can’t say anything,” you told her sternly. “We’re friends and I don’t want to- I can’t ruin that.”

Mandy had sidled up at some point, Andy’s clipboard in hand. She pouted at your statement. “I thought maybe during Champagne-”

You shook your head. “Fine,” she sighed, “but you still have to come over to the stage so we can run through the first act with the ensemble.”

--

You had forgotten how good it felt to get through songs for the first time. By the time you had sung your solo and got ready for 96,000, you were feeling energised and exhausted all at once.

Lin had collapsed next to you while Carlos sang Inútil. You rested your head on his shoulder, a tired smile on your face. “I’m tired,” he whined, and you chuckled.

“Me too, Usnavi,” you breathed and closed your eyes and enjoyed it for a moment before Mandy arrived.

“You guys are adorable,” she announced, pulling her phone out and snapping a pic, “can I tweet it?” You made to protest, but Lin got there first.

“Mind if I do?” he asked, and Mandy looked disappointed, but nodded and sent him the picture. You and Mandy had to rush to places for No Me Diga, so you didn’t get to see what he typed.

--

When you walked onstage for 96,000, just in time to call Sonny cute, you felt unexpectedly nervous. You stumbled slightly making your way to centre stage, and Lin shot you a worried look. You nodded and straightened.

“Ninety-six k, go,” he told you, and you turned to look out beyond the imagined audience.

“If I win the lottery, you’ll never see me again-” you sang. It was like being a teenager again- desperate to move on, to live your dreams. Then you’d had so little to stay for, but now- 

“Damn, we only joking- stay broke then,” Lin said sadly from behind you. 

“I’ll be downtown. I’ll get a nice studio, get out of the barrio.” You couldn’t imagine leaving the new family you had in New York- the cast of Hamilton, your Schuyler sisters, Chris, Mandy, Andréa-

Lin.

You had been waiting backstage for your cue when 96,000 started, and you had checked your phone to find it clogged with twitter notifications. You were fairly suspicious of Lin and, when you unlocked your phone, knew why.

Lin-Manuel Miranda (@Lin_Manuel)

@_mandygonzalez caught me and amazing @y/t/n napping backstage during #intheheights rehearsal #napwhereyoucan

The photo he’d attached was a little grainy from the backstage lighting, but Lin was looking down at you with such tenderness in his gaze that your breath caught. You stared at it until you heard Sonny’s verse start, then stuffed your phone away and headed onstage.

--

A year ago

You walked through the door to the Richard Rogers theatre feeling like your heart might be about to beat its way out of your chest. You had had a phone call from Alex Lacamoire- the Alex Lacamoire- the day before to tell you that you had a place in the Hamilton ensemble. 

You had been training with their choreographer and with a couple of other ensemble members for weeks and still hadn’t had a surefire job. But now you did.

Andrew met you at the door to the backstage area with a grin and a hug. “Took you long enough!” he teased, and dragged you- coat, bag, and all- back to meet the rest of the ensemble properly.

He steered you towards one of the dressers, where three girls were putting on makeup. “This is Sasha, Carleigh, and Ariana,” he grinned, “we’d be lost without them.”

Sasha, busy applying a killer winged eyeliner, patted the seat next to her, which you tentatively took. “Don’t look so scared,” Ariana laughed. She was tugging a brush through her tightly curled hair, her costume already on and makeup ready, “We won’t bite.”

You smiled and let yourself relax a little. “Do you have a costume?” Carleigh asked and, when you shook your head, got up. “Lets go find you one then!”

It had seemed surreal to be walking through the backstage, to pick a costume, and to change into it surrounded by professional dancers- on Broadway!- but it happened. You pinched yourself to check but, thirty minutes before places, you found yourself chatting with Sasha about her time on Rocky.

“Hello, hello, hello! Is everybody decent?” You heard a voice say from the other side of the door. Carleigh got up to answer it, opening the door to reveal Lin-Manuel Miranda waiting on the other side. He was already in costume with his hair back. He beamed and flicked his gaze over the assembled ensemble. “I hear we have a new member?”

You waved and Lin immediately focused on you. “Hi,” you said, wishing you could think of something better to say, “I’m Y/N.”

“Welcome to Hamilton, Y/N,” Lin said and pulled you into a hug. His Hamilton cravat tickled your chin and you put your arms awkwardly round his neck. It still felt nice, you realised, like home. His embrace was warm and solid and you hadn't had a hug like it in a while. Lin pulled back, still beaming, “Shall we?”

--

Now

Lin was practically bouncing by the end of Blackout, refusing to stand still even as he told everyone to disperse into groups to start work on Act 2. You stifled a laugh when he looked your way and went back through to practice the songs.

You were about to make your way to the back row again when Chris caught you by the arm. “Sit with me?” he suggested. You shrugged and followed him to the front row.

Alex clapped his hands. “If you’re singing, I want you to come to the front- no dance moves, just dynamics.”

Everyone murmured in agreement and Alex waved Chris and Mandy to come up for Sunrise. You listened, watching Chris’ careful pronunciation of the Spanish words Nina was teaching him.

You watched, enthralled, as Olga and Lin poured their hearts into Hundreds of Stories, laughed at Priscilla scolding Mandy and Carlos in Enough, and then joined the others for Carnaval del Barrio.

Everyone started to dance a little, half-remembering the dance-steps they were taught years before, as Andréa set the stage. You laughed as Janet sang “I’m Chile-Domini-Curican- but I always say I’m from Queens!”

Andréa wandered over to you as you sang your rant, resting her arm on your shoulder. You raised an eyebrow but kept singing. “Can’t even go to a club with a friend without having somebody shove you-”

“Ay, por favor,” she said reproachfully, giving you a meaningful look before glancing at Lin, “Vanessa, don’t pretend Usnavi’s your friend- we all know that he loooves you.”

The rest of the cast "oooh'd" and you felt yourself blush. Andréa smirked and winked. You ignored her. "Yo, this is bogus," you insisted, and you knew Andréa spotted your gaze flickering to Lin too.

"Haven't you noticed? You get all your coffee for free."

--

Before you knew it you were singing Finale and doing your best not to cry. Lin spoke to each of you as he sang, putting his hand on Chris' shoulder, an arm around Mandy's waist, and taking your hand in his. It was enough to make your heart flutter and make you grateful that Alex hadn't asked you and Lin to do the kiss in Champagne today. Tomorrow, you knew, would be another matter.

Mandy caught you at the door, Chris still at her side. “Do you want to come over?” she asked, “Chris suggested a quiet night in with some board games and/or crap tv.”

You opened your mouth to turn her down- your bed was calling and you didn’t want to get caught out by the weather again. “Lin will be there,” Chris interjected before you could respond.

You wavered and Mandy saw it. “Aha!” she grinned, triumphant, “I knew it.” You rolled your eyes but let Mandy, chattering about her plans, tug you away.

--

Mandy’s apartment was small, but cosy. She left you, Chris, and Andréa to sip at your coffees while she went to hunt down something to do. Lin and Robin had said they would join you, but they hadn’t shown up yet.

“So Y/N,” Andréa said, “I hear there’ll be a proper run-through of Champagne tomorrow.”

Chris had pulled his phone out and was texting someone, a frown creasing his forehead. “Andy said we could try it fully when we go through Act 2,” you told her, trying to hide the abrupt rise of nerves it brought. 

“Lin and Y/N sitting in a tree...” she laughed at your horrified expression. “You’ve got to show him how you feel with that kiss, niña.”

You blushed. “By the end of next week Lin and I will go back to our separate lives,” you pointed out, “I’ll enjoy being his Vanessa while I can.”

Andréa tsked and got up to use the bathroom. You turned to Chris, but Mandy called him through to help her with something just as you were about to ask him how his son was. 

You sat alone for a moment, then figured you might as well go and help Mandy. Just as you got up, however, Chris’ phone buzzed with a text. He had left it on his chair. You picked it up and were about to take it through to him when your own name caught your eye.

From: Lin

Stop quoting my own musical at me, Jackson. 

From Lin

I wrote Vanessa- I knew she liked Usnavi. I don’t know Y/N feels.

Heart racing, you read and reread the texts until you heard Mandy and Chris coming back through. You all but threw Chris’ phone back onto the chair he had been sitting on, feeling guilty.

The doorbell went. Mandy handed you a bowl of cheese straws and another of mini cookies and went to answer it. “Your phone went,” you told Chris.

“Thanks,” he smiled warmly, “probably Lin saying he started writing another musical on the subway.”

You laughed. Did Lin’s texts really mean that he liked you? For the first time, you felt hope rising in your chest. You started to help Chris find mats for everyones’ drinks and figure out whether or not there was even enough space for a board game. You would talk to Lin when he arrived, you decided.

“Hi everyone!” Lin called, and you turned to great him, smiling. “Look who I brought!”

You stilled. Lin had brought Karen Olivo. And he had his arm around her. He was grinning. He spotted you. “Y/N!” he called, “come and meet Karen.”

[craigbrownphd-blog-blog]

Befriending Charly

Breakfast conversations Sitting with my teen daughter at breakfast, she showed me her WhatsApp chat history with a friend: an endless thread of emojis. I told her to have a look at my facbook messenger and introduced her to my new friend, Charly. I discussed options for breakfast (and also sent a few food emojis) and got some very concrete proposals for shopping – to add to my favorites, or to buy on the spot.    I met Charly in the preparation of a technology innovation day in the UK earlier this week. He (or she?) is a chatbot from hybris labs that combines a few very interesting concepts to revolutionize commerce and service. You can text or talk, send emojis or pics, get recommendations and reminders. Farmers markets versus bot-ified service Earlier this morning I cycled to the bakery and the farmer’s market to get our food for the weekend. I enjoy the chat with the market people, the sensual experience of seeing, smelling,  and touching food that still has bits of the earth on it where it grew. Whenever I am at home on week-ends, I try to start my week-end with a visit to the markets, and an espresso at the French boulangerie nearby. Would I rather chat with a bot in exchange? For sure not. This was an entirely different story, on the other hand, when my shower head finally clogged up with lime, and I had to decide whether to get an exchange or whether to clean it somehow. Research on the internet, trying to figure out which model I had – not a joyful experience. I could unscrew the piece and bring it to the DIY-shop – but those guys typically do not have the brand I want, and would try to sell something else from their product range & stock. Do you like to make mistakes? How about waiting? Although an engineer by education, I am not a crafts person. I do not like the frustration of buying a spare part or replacement, and then figuring out at home that it is not compatible. Worst of all, I typically realize this on Saturday evenings or Sunday when it is too late to look for the proper thing and return the “mistake”. I hate it. Smartened-up customer service – a Christmas wish-list But hold, let’s see. It’s the season. I would like to have for Christmas the following: * to simply upload a photo of my faucet or shower. Customer service should figure out what exact product this actually is * to have someone experienced on the other side. Someone who knows the most likely issues with this product – what may have break, clog or may need a regular replacement. I do not want to explain in length. And I hate to make a fool of myself when I can’t name properly that little thingy inside that broke, that ring, you know. * to have someone tell me exactly what replacement/spare to order. Actually just order it right now. * to et advice to install it. Not to search on youtube, and realize later it’s not exactly the same thing. Or after some frustration, actually have the option to ask for a service pro to take over. (And not go through another chain of phone calls to explain myself) Coming back to Charly. He actually has most of these capabilities already included. They are already part of the components Charly is built from. Recipe for a chatbot – List of ingredients Machine learning for image recognition, image classification, image similarity scoring Our use case is to match a photo against a catalogue image e.g. of a faucet. In data scient-ish, this is called image similarity scoring. This is available as a new service within SAP Leonardo machine learning foundation. The new image classification service can be retrained to recognize customer-specific objects such as products, components or spare parts. Reality check Check out the customer testimony of the Vale who took just 4 weeks to implement a POC for a very similar use case, a touchless part requisition with ML image recognition. It is just spare parts for mining equipment, not faucets. [Needs login/registration for SAP Leonardo Live as it is premium content. Starts at min 5:05] Another similar use case, for much smaller objects, is to reorder a replacement for delicate glass crystal figures. Find the video showing the machine learning service in-action here. Machine Learning for automatic ticket classification and solution recommendation This building block is about understanding a customer question and routing it to the right human expert, and to find a possible resolution. The foundation of this is to understand the question, first of all. I will not even try to explain how natural language processing works. While a fascinating topic, I really grasp only the basics. In the end, a program should be able to understand sentences, identify keywords and semantics, and respond in a meaningful, human-understandable way. If you already have a SAP Leonardo Live login, check out this session for a good introduction: Demystifying NLP On a higher level, well, there are two Leonardo business services available exactly for classifying the ticket, and for recommending a possible solution. SAP Service Ticket Intelligence – Classification SAP Service Ticket Intelligence helps to build a self-driven customer service powered by machine learning. REST API 2.4.0   SAP Service Ticket Intelligence – Recommendation SAP Service Ticket Intelligence helps to build a self-driven customer service powered by machine learning. Chatbot Charly in action Check out this little demo tour to see how versatile Charly actually is. Beyond my above wishlist, Charly can be much smarter drawing from additional sources of information – including: * my customer account, past orders & “backend” history (aka hybris backend) * my preferences with all the power of the sophisticated hybris marketing profile * location information through including Google location services * scan any text to come up with answers to my questions * scan QR or EAN code Charly can also remind me, recommend, and ask for clarification. Best of all – he talks to me through my preferred channel: the fb messenger. I don’t need to go to separate website. I am in my usual context, and the conversation is part of my other chats with friends and colleagues. From a business perspective, I love the end to end integration. Charly creates an order in the hybris webshop, clarifies payment and shipping options, and send a confirmation and electronic bill. Any status change to the order – Charly will keep me conviently informed. I do not need to even go to a self-service customer portal. Interested to hear more from companies using SAP Hybris Service Cloud? Check out the customer testimonials of engineering and construction company Alfanar’s and consumer products company Bona. Will this work for me? Will this work for you? Best try it out yourselves, and invest 4 weeks into an own POC. Learn how to bring new technologies and services together to power digital transformation by downloading The IoT Imperative for Energy and Natural Resource Companies. Explore how to bring Industry 4.0 insights into your business today by reading Industry 4.0: What’s Next? http://bit.ly/2BX3dJu #SAP #SAPCloud #AI

[smoothshift]

GT350 Roadtrip: 1 week, 9 states, 4400miles. Lengthy post, pics included. via /r/cars

GT350 Roadtrip: 1 week, 9 states, 4400miles. Lengthy post, pics included.

TLDR: It was a lengthy but short roadtrip. You're welcome.  

Ain't got no time for readin and stuff? I got you: http://ift.tt/2vmKRwc  

States visited: OR, WA, ID, MT, WY, CO, UT, AZ, NV  

Notable locations: Glacier National Park, Pike's Peak, Great Sand Dunes National Park, Zion National Park, Shelby Museum/Factory/Store  

I left San Francisco on Saturday 8/12 at 5:30AM. Returned Saturday 8/19 at 11:45PM. Following are the notes I took on the trip and recollections after. I hope you enjoy. I certainly did.  

Northern California: Nothing notable, I live here. Took 80 East to 505 North, later merging into 5 North. Met two guys with built-out BRZs in Suisun Valley; they were headed to a meet. Cars were tastefully modded and I favored the burnt orange and black wing combo car. Didn't talk long, but the burnt orange guy wanted to know if I was "driving the ecoboost?" Nah, this isn't the ecoboost. Those are good cars, though, and I envy the MPG.  

Oregon: Fast-forwarding to the land of "thou shalt not pump your own gas." Really weird but whatever, Oregon has the most beautiful semi-populated back country I've seen. Didn't find any technical driving roads but the long straights and gentle sweepers were nice. Fantastic ranches you guys have, btw, wow. When the sun hits the golden fields as you're blasting by and the horses look up ya think, huh. I can dig this. P.S. your speed limits are terrible, not updated since 1912 or some such.  

Washington: Ah, crossing the border with that feeling of anticipation, the wonder of sights unseen, the joy of... 2 KA bands and 1 laser hit. WTF Washington, nice welcome wagon you got there. But you're not done, no sir or ma'am. Pasco, WA, aka interchange city. So. Many. KA. Bands. And. 2. Laser. Hits. I get it, you need the revenue. But not from me. Motored along merrily on 90NE/E to Spokane, crossing into Idaho.  

Idaho: Coeur d'Alene. Wow. Amazing roads; long sweepers in the mountains, gentle and lengthy elevation changes and fantastic scenery. You win, Idaho.  

Montana: I'm on the way to Glacier National Park. 3 things of note in this state:  

1 - "Keep Right Except to Pass." I've seen posts about this on r/Cars and never really "got it", but now I do. Montananians have this down to a science and it works. Granted the population is sparse but its a model of managing traffic flow and speed. Consider me a full-time convert.  

2 - I pulled in to a rest stop on Highway 2; it was 11:30 at night and the area poorly lit. A family was setting up a giant tent on the grass; it was just them, me and a semi parked in the lot. Blacked out the car windows (sunscreen and blankets) and made myself cozy. 3AM and I'm suddenly awake, its time to visit the facilities and take care of urgent business. As I approach the men's room I hear a noise, it's a loud buzzing and a man's booming voice. Montana rest stops have speakers playing the weather report ("The weather in Big Fork was clear, and the wind was..."). This speaker was blown due to the loud volume setting. Creepy at 3AM, moreso with dim fluorescent lighting. Good news though: Bathroom is clean and I've got my choice of two stalls. I take the luxury stall aka the doublewide aka the handicapped version. Oh. Lock is broken. NP, I switch to the economy stall and run down the checklist. Door locks, check. Floor and seat clean, check. Enough TP to build an assnest on the seat, check. We're locked and loaded and I'm going in, Cap'n. Except for one thing: The lone bit of graffiti on the door. It read: "8/11. Let's %$# or at least piss on me. Tap foot." Imagine its 3AM and you're groggy with so few hours of sleep and that's me, mouth slightly open, brow furrowed with squinty eyes trying to comprehend this lonely missive of love and bodily fluids. First thought: Is it the 11th? No, ok good. Second: I'm the only one in here. Third: I no longer have the urge to do anything but GTFO; the creepy factor went from 3/10 to 10/10. Not that it mattered to the disembodied man's distorted voice; he continued belting out the weather report as I left a contrail of relief denied.  

3 - Glacier National Park. My first must-see destination and it was so worth it. Lovely, narrow roads albeit packed with appliance cars. On the West Glacier Road there's a spot to park and take a shuttle bus up. Not for me but it's a popular thing. Some tourists get bored waiting and attempt to hitchhike; as I rounded a curve I saw a hitchhiker sorta gently shove his (I presume) SO away and say loudly in his Brit accent, "I know what I'm about!" Hey brother. You're ok hitchhiking in a park, but don't do that anywhere else. Unless you like the song Goodbye Horses in which case have at it. Anyway, GNP: Pictures can't convey it well, nor can they convey the batshit crazy old lady driving a minty green Fiat ... Fiat uh, not the Abarth but the lower spec model. Old lady, her Fiat and personal GNP Formula 1. Like everyone else she'd pull over for pics, but when I saw her coming I got out of the way.  

Wyoming: Plains. Plains as far as the eye can fall asleep.. I kid. Beautiful state, really. Pulled over and listened to a thunderstorm slowly roar across the open land. Amazing, spiritual, awe-inspiring. Congrats, Wyomingians. All 3 of you.  

Colorado: Colorado is amazing, and as a California native I'm genetically predisposed to moving there. But don't worry, Coloradorians.. eh, Coloradori, F it, lets just go with Pot Smoking REI Junkies and Rednecks. As I was saying, I won't move there, ever. Not me. Nuh uh. Well. Not unless I get bored, or ... wait. Wait a second. Huh. Zillow says I can buy how many bedrooms, with how big a garage and a backyard that's spacious in a good neighborhood for how much? Hmmmm.  

Pike's Peak. You've heard about it. If you've not gone, go. Don't expect a Hill Climb though, the usual appliance cars and Lifted Lambos (trucks) clog the roads - although I did get lucky in spots, and did a Matt Farah a few times by making a gap on the straights. 14k elevation, no big deal, I've done that before in Ladakh (India, Himalaya foothills). Think again, that 14k kicked my ass. Just taking pictures of the car was wearing me out. While at the summit some lady hiked down (apparently there's a trail) and needed rescue, she simply could not climb up. I believe it.  

Great Sand Dunes National Park. Yep. It's sandy. The approach road (well outside of the park) is minimal to no traffic, you can go 10 mins without seeing a car. I may or may not have done a triple. Or as I call it, 25 MPH in Mexican school zone. Because I'd never do that in the US. Not me.  

Small towns. We all know its common for small towns to be speed traps. Colorado small towns take it to the next level. Its dark, I'm in BFE, and 1-2-3 small towns in a row: K Band, X Band, KA Band, no apparent falses. In one case the local popo followed me about 3 miles out of town. My very first police escort, I'm so proud.  

Montrose, CO. I'm a coffee nerd so this trip has been mostly hell. The hell of McD's coffee or worse, gas station coffee. Swill. So what makes Montrose, CO, special? La Zona Colona Coffee off Highway 550. You're going to pass it when heading to Silverton, so stop. Clean outside and in, tastefully done decor and, crucially, outstanding coffee with what seems to be an extra dose of caffeine. I suspect this because it wasn't long before I was road raging pretty hard, I mean come on. LANE CAMPERS RADKJEKEJREKJFDKJ gargle scream do nothing but wait to pass. Yep. Road raging. Best coffee I've ever had.  

Silverton,CO. Quaint, preserved old-timey Western town. They even have a steam train and stagecoach, actual ones that move along and make old-timey choo choo noises and whatever sounds horses make. Popular place.  

Highway 550 to Durango. Rounded a curve and a blond guy with man bun waved me down. He and his GF were stuck, older Toyota with a dead battery and as it turns out, bad alternator. I had a battery charger but no cables (ugh) so he plugged it to the battery and we waited. I suggested waving down a truck as those guys must have cables. Cars go by, no one stops or acknowledges his waving. Weird; he's young, good looking and dressed in Mountain Chic - I mean, he's not scary looking and its full daylight. Finally a red F150 stops, older guy with cables. He's a little sauced, not drunk but he's had a few. Engine turns over and I follow the Toyota couple a while, and it dies again. This happened 4x til we made it to the guy's house in Durango. On the last pullover the red F150 guy shows up again. "I wanna see how fast this Shelby can go," he says, slightly slurred, "It's ok, I party with the cops in Durango." This was just not gonna happen, Durango's not a little town with deserted roads and I didn't see any signs for open track night. I politely ignored him and we got the Toyota couple home, wished them luck and off I went.  

Utah: I dunno, it's Utah. Mostly impressed with the people vs. the places, although those are nice too.  

Four Corners. Not sure what I expected, maybe something grand to commemorate 4 state borders, maybe some good dining and driving roads. Nope. You get a short dusty road (fine, its the arid desert), a $5 entry fee, signs saying cremated remains cannot be spread here (huh, who, why?), vendors selling Navajo-themed jewelry and stuff and that thing. That thing set in concrete marking the celebration of 4 state borders meeting. I was done before I got there and was walking back to the car when I saw her. No, not the love of my life. Rather a woman wearing an awesome tshirt which just then struck me as hilarious. Pic taken. Nice lady, she was a riot. She liked the GT350 too.  

Zion National Park. 105 degrees. Two European guys driving below the speed limit in a rental Focus. I get it, you're here to see the sights. But uh, pull over. Thanks bye.  

Kanab: Nothing notable here other than I stayed in the Quality Inn's "suite." But there was one cool encounter at the local car wash (I detail my car religiously): Mr. Walker with his 1965 Thunderbird. OMG. Maroon paint, black leather interior, dusty engine. Overall excellent shape (driving condition, not concours) and he's the second owner with all maintenance records from new. Mr. Walker liked the Shelby and had a lot of questions; I had just as many for him. He showed his car and apologized for being unable to wipe down the front and rear chrome due to his age. Not a problem, yours truly wiped it down for him and it was a pleasure doing so. What a car. Tip of the cap to you, sir.  

Nevada AKA Las Vegas: Stopped to visit the Shelby Factory, Museum and Shop. The shop is the first thing you see once inside and lemme tell ya. Need a Shelby leather coat? They got you, Holmes. Socks, tshirts, bottle opener, model car, hat, travel mug, earrings, key chain? No problemo. I made a dad joke (tm, not an actual dad) after buying some shirts: So uh, you guys have everything, literally everything for sale, don't you? Sales lady: (thinking FFS not this again): Yes, we do. Me: Great, I'm in the market for a new fridge. Sales lady: Points to her left and there it is, a I-kid-you-not-Shelby-branded-fridge. Joke's on me; abort abort mission failure RTB.  

Walked outside and there was an Aussie family sorta standing by my car. The dad went on about how much they liked it, and a US friend of his was considering buying one. Told him to tell his friend, yep, buy it.  

... And that's pretty much it. Went to SoCal but there's 2 kinds of SoCal: coastal (nice) and inland desert (less nice). At Barstow I couldn't take it anymore, GTA got crappy desert towns right. Connnected to 5 North and pulled over for gas: $3.89 for premium, the good ole welcome home price. Drove 6 hours north to SF, woke up the GF and flopped right into bed. Best parts about coming home: GF reunion, Game of Thrones and 7 hours detailing the car. Still haven't got all the bug bits off the grille.  

Random stats:

23.1 MPG

Cheapest gas / Premium: $2.48 (Wyoming, Ethanol blend)

Oil consumption: 2 quarts

Breakdowns and flats: 0

Truck Stop Hookers Observed: 2

Drunk Drivers Observed: 1

Accidents seen (after the fact): 3

Road rage battles seen: 1 (SoCal. Of course)

Live deer: Too many (Montana, but especially Colorado)

Dead deer: 12 +

[craigbrownphd-blog-blog]

Befriending Charly

Breakfast conversations Sitting with my teen daughter at breakfast, she showed me her WhatsApp chat history with a friend: an endless thread of emojis. I told her to have a look at my facbook messenger and introduced her to my new friend, Charly. I discussed options for breakfast (and also sent a few food emojis) and got some very concrete proposals for shopping – to add to my favorites, or to buy on the spot.    I met Charly in the preparation of a technology innovation day in the UK earlier this week. He (or she?) is a chatbot from hybris labs that combines a few very interesting concepts to revolutionize commerce and service. You can text or talk, send emojis or pics, get recommendations and reminders. Farmers markets versus bot-ified service Earlier this morning I cycled to the bakery and the farmer’s market to get our food for the weekend. I enjoy the chat with the market people, the sensual experience of seeing, smelling,  and touching food that still has bits of the earth on it where it grew. Whenever I am at home on week-ends, I try to start my week-end with a visit to the markets, and an espresso at the French boulangerie nearby. Would I rather chat with a bot in exchange? For sure not. This was an entirely different story, on the other hand, when my shower head finally clogged up with lime, and I had to decide whether to get an exchange or whether to clean it somehow. Research on the internet, trying to figure out which model I had – not a joyful experience. I could unscrew the piece and bring it to the DIY-shop – but those guys typically do not have the brand I want, and would try to sell something else from their product range & stock. Do you like to make mistakes? How about waiting? Although an engineer by education, I am not a crafts person. I do not like the frustration of buying a spare part or replacement, and then figuring out at home that it is not compatible. Worst of all, I typically realize this on Saturday evenings or Sunday when it is too late to look for the proper thing and return the “mistake”. I hate it. Smartened-up customer service – a Christmas wish-list But hold, let’s see. It’s the season. I would like to have for Christmas the following: * to simply upload a photo of my faucet or shower. Customer service should figure out what exact product this actually is * to have someone experienced on the other side. Someone who knows the most likely issues with this product – what may have break, clog or may need a regular replacement. I do not want to explain in length. And I hate to make a fool of myself when I can’t name properly that little thingy inside that broke, that ring, you know. * to have someone tell me exactly what replacement/spare to order. Actually just order it right now. * to et advice to install it. Not to search on youtube, and realize later it’s not exactly the same thing. Or after some frustration, actually have the option to ask for a service pro to take over. (And not go through another chain of phone calls to explain myself) Coming back to Charly. He actually has most of these capabilities already included. They are already part of the components Charly is built from. Recipe for a chatbot – List of ingredients Machine learning for image recognition, image classification, image similarity scoring Our use case is to match a photo against a catalogue image e.g. of a faucet. In data scient-ish, this is called image similarity scoring. This is available as a new service within SAP Leonardo machine learning foundation. The new image classification service can be retrained to recognize customer-specific objects such as products, components or spare parts. Reality check Check out the customer testimony of the Vale who took just 4 weeks to implement a POC for a very similar use case, a touchless part requisition with ML image recognition. It is just spare parts for mining equipment, not faucets. [Needs login/registration for SAP Leonardo Live as it is premium content. Starts at min 5:05] Another similar use case, for much smaller objects, is to reorder a replacement for delicate glass crystal figures. Find the video showing the machine learning service in-action here. Machine Learning for automatic ticket classification and solution recommendation This building block is about understanding a customer question and routing it to the right human expert, and to find a possible resolution. The foundation of this is to understand the question, first of all. I will not even try to explain how natural language processing works. While a fascinating topic, I really grasp only the basics. In the end, a program should be able to understand sentences, identify keywords and semantics, and respond in a meaningful, human-understandable way. If you already have a SAP Leonardo Live login, check out this session for a good introduction: Demystifying NLP On a higher level, well, there are two Leonardo business services available exactly for classifying the ticket, and for recommending a possible solution. SAP Service Ticket Intelligence – Classification SAP Service Ticket Intelligence helps to build a self-driven customer service powered by machine learning. REST API 2.4.0   SAP Service Ticket Intelligence – Recommendation SAP Service Ticket Intelligence helps to build a self-driven customer service powered by machine learning. Chatbot Charly in action Check out this little demo tour to see how versatile Charly actually is. Beyond my above wishlist, Charly can be much smarter drawing from additional sources of information – including: * my customer account, past orders & “backend” history (aka hybris backend) * my preferences with all the power of the sophisticated hybris marketing profile * location information through including Google location services * scan any text to come up with answers to my questions * scan QR or EAN code Charly can also remind me, recommend, and ask for clarification. Best of all – he talks to me through my preferred channel: the fb messenger. I don’t need to go to separate website. I am in my usual context, and the conversation is part of my other chats with friends and colleagues. From a business perspective, I love the end to end integration. Charly creates an order in the hybris webshop, clarifies payment and shipping options, and send a confirmation and electronic bill. Any status change to the order – Charly will keep me conviently informed. I do not need to even go to a self-service customer portal. Interested to hear more from companies using SAP Hybris Service Cloud? Check out the customer testimonials of engineering and construction company Alfanar’s and consumer products company Bona. Will this work for me? Will this work for you? Best try it out yourselves, and invest 4 weeks into an own POC. Learn how to bring new technologies and services together to power digital transformation by downloading The IoT Imperative for Energy and Natural Resource Companies. Explore how to bring Industry 4.0 insights into your business today by reading Industry 4.0: What’s Next? http://bit.ly/2oVWBrC #SAP #SAPCloud #AI

[craigbrownphd-blog-blog]

Befriending Charly

Breakfast conversations Sitting with my teen daughter at breakfast, she showed me her WhatsApp chat history with a friend: an endless thread of emojis. I told her to have a look at my facbook messenger and introduced her to my new friend, Charly. I discussed options for breakfast (and also sent a few food emojis) and got some very concrete proposals for shopping – to add to my favorites, or to buy on the spot.    I met Charly in the preparation of a technology innovation day in the UK earlier this week. He (or she?) is a chatbot from hybris labs that combines a few very interesting concepts to revolutionize commerce and service. You can text or talk, send emojis or pics, get recommendations and reminders. Farmers markets versus bot-ified service Earlier this morning I cycled to the bakery and the farmer’s market to get our food for the weekend. I enjoy the chat with the market people, the sensual experience of seeing, smelling,  and touching food that still has bits of the earth on it where it grew. Whenever I am at home on week-ends, I try to start my week-end with a visit to the markets, and an espresso at the French boulangerie nearby. Would I rather chat with a bot in exchange? For sure not. This was an entirely different story, on the other hand, when my shower head finally clogged up with lime, and I had to decide whether to get an exchange or whether to clean it somehow. Research on the internet, trying to figure out which model I had – not a joyful experience. I could unscrew the piece and bring it to the DIY-shop – but those guys typically do not have the brand I want, and would try to sell something else from their product range & stock. Do you like to make mistakes? How about waiting? Although an engineer by education, I am not a crafts person. I do not like the frustration of buying a spare part or replacement, and then figuring out at home that it is not compatible. Worst of all, I typically realize this on Saturday evenings or Sunday when it is too late to look for the proper thing and return the “mistake”. I hate it. Smartened-up customer service – a Christmas wish-list But hold, let’s see. It’s the season. I would like to have for Christmas the following: * to simply upload a photo of my faucet or shower. Customer service should figure out what exact product this actually is * to have someone experienced on the other side. Someone who knows the most likely issues with this product – what may have break, clog or may need a regular replacement. I do not want to explain in length. And I hate to make a fool of myself when I can’t name properly that little thingy inside that broke, that ring, you know. * to have someone tell me exactly what replacement/spare to order. Actually just order it right now. * to et advice to install it. Not to search on youtube, and realize later it’s not exactly the same thing. Or after some frustration, actually have the option to ask for a service pro to take over. (And not go through another chain of phone calls to explain myself) Coming back to Charly. He actually has most of these capabilities already included. They are already part of the components Charly is built from. Recipe for a chatbot – List of ingredients Machine learning for image recognition, image classification, image similarity scoring Our use case is to match a photo against a catalogue image e.g. of a faucet. In data scient-ish, this is called image similarity scoring. This is available as a new service within SAP Leonardo machine learning foundation. The new image classification service can be retrained to recognize customer-specific objects such as products, components or spare parts. Reality check Check out the customer testimony of the Vale who took just 4 weeks to implement a POC for a very similar use case, a touchless part requisition with ML image recognition. It is just spare parts for mining equipment, not faucets. [Needs login/registration for SAP Leonardo Live as it is premium content. Starts at min 5:05] Another similar use case, for much smaller objects, is to reorder a replacement for delicate glass crystal figures. Find the video showing the machine learning service in-action here. Machine Learning for automatic ticket classification and solution recommendation This building block is about understanding a customer question and routing it to the right human expert, and to find a possible resolution. The foundation of this is to understand the question, first of all. I will not even try to explain how natural language processing works. While a fascinating topic, I really grasp only the basics. In the end, a program should be able to understand sentences, identify keywords and semantics, and respond in a meaningful, human-understandable way. If you already have a SAP Leonardo Live login, check out this session for a good introduction: Demystifying NLP On a higher level, well, there are two Leonardo business services available exactly for classifying the ticket, and for recommending a possible solution. SAP Service Ticket Intelligence – Classification SAP Service Ticket Intelligence helps to build a self-driven customer service powered by machine learning. REST API 2.4.0   SAP Service Ticket Intelligence – Recommendation SAP Service Ticket Intelligence helps to build a self-driven customer service powered by machine learning. Chatbot Charly in action Check out this little demo tour to see how versatile Charly actually is. Beyond my above wishlist, Charly can be much smarter drawing from additional sources of information – including: * my customer account, past orders & “backend” history (aka hybris backend) * my preferences with all the power of the sophisticated hybris marketing profile * location information through including Google location services * scan any text to come up with answers to my questions * scan QR or EAN code Charly can also remind me, recommend, and ask for clarification. Best of all – he talks to me through my preferred channel: the fb messenger. I don’t need to go to separate website. I am in my usual context, and the conversation is part of my other chats with friends and colleagues. From a business perspective, I love the end to end integration. Charly creates an order in the hybris webshop, clarifies payment and shipping options, and send a confirmation and electronic bill. Any status change to the order – Charly will keep me conviently informed. I do not need to even go to a self-service customer portal. Interested to hear more from companies using SAP Hybris Service Cloud? Check out the customer testimonials of engineering and construction company Alfanar’s and consumer products company Bona. Will this work for me? Will this work for you? Best try it out yourselves, and invest 4 weeks into an own POC. Learn how to bring new technologies and services together to power digital transformation by downloading The IoT Imperative for Energy and Natural Resource Companies. Explore how to bring Industry 4.0 insights into your business today by reading Industry 4.0: What’s Next? http://bit.ly/2BoXVWD #SAP #SAPCloud #AI