#I wish I could just get stuff done
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I’m here to give you more puppy pictures since you said your night wasn’t going great ❤️
Feel free to ramble/vent if you like, or just enjoy puppy love from Anakin and hugs from me ❤️
First, have a quick redraw of that adorable adorable picture 🥺🥺🥺
Second absence haha Lofty you're the sweetest most kindest person! I should be trying to comfort YOU with what you're going through!
Third, it's so dumb what made me so incredibly emotional tonight, literally just getting ignored while trying to leave a loud room was enough to throw me off after realizing I have approximately 7 hours of homework tonight T-T I feel so silly for being so upset over stuff I did to myself
Plus body issues but I've never managed to make those go away
#nanswers!#Lofty the amazing human#Lofty seriously though if I can do anything for you right now please please let me know#You deserve the world#I wish I could just get stuff done#Instead I'm sitting here trying to bribe myself to work on my homework#Sorry for being so emotional about such minor stuff
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I made a few new wax seal stamps out of clay (like the ones I did for my worldbuilding stuff forever ago), this time just of random symbols that I thought might look good done in the style of painting over the raised part of the wax or etc. :0c Some of them aren't carved deep enough to really show up that well, but overall they worked okay for being clay lol
#wax seal#crafts#wax stamp#stationery#Window one is kind of stinky.. I was imagining like a swirly night sky sort of looking thing so it would be a surreal contrast of a night#sky with a window in the middle that shows a daytime sky - but the silver and purple wax kind of mixed too much together#with the black and it just looks very plain black and not all that starry or anything hjbhj.. Of course the eye is probably my favorite#since all I ever do is draw eyes and still like eye imagery for some reason. The four leaf clover is very lumpy and skrunkty but also it wa#the smallest in size out of all of them so was easier to do multiple stamps of just to try it out.#The heart with eyes wax is actually more swirly in person. I wanted it to be a mix of light pink and red and white. and the wax#did kind of all blend together but in person you can definitely see MORE of the intentional swirlyness. in this it just looks plain pink.#I was going to do one eye in the heart but it looked weird. but now two seems too plain. i could have done 3?? in a pattern.. hmm#alas. I wish I could make actual metal ones. With the clay i have to paint them in a thin layer of olive oil before stamping because#otherwise the wax just kind of gets stuck in the grooves of the clay and then you can't pull it up. Very wacky ''unprofessional'' looking#set up where I'm hot gluing circles of sculpey clay to short stumps of a wooden dowel that I sawed apart with a serrated bread knife#and then using an old paintbrush to put olive oil on them whilst holding a spoon over a yankee candle flame hjbjh#ANYWAY.. I think if I were middle class/rich/etc. this would be one of the main things in my crafting room is like.. SO many colors#of wax. and all different custom made stamps designed by me. which could be much more elaborate in actual metal.. muahaha.... >:)c#RHGghhh... I actually don't want to talk much about it since (this is probably just my Obsessed With My Own World Artist Delusions) I#think I have a really cool idea for a game that could genuinely be successful if i ever get to make it and I don't want to give#everything away and spoil the whole plot/concept in hopes that one day I can actually do it - BUT - a game that I'd like to make after the#visual novel I'm making now has partially to do with the main character working as a sort of writer/scribe/artist assistant in an elven#city (set in my world/with my worldbuilding species and versions of elves and etc) and I was thinking of maybe incorporating#somehow being able to collect little writing type items like these like.. you can get different wax seal patterns or pens or etc. when I do#stuff like this in Real Life it always makes me think of that like.. ouh... this is good research.. what it shall be like to be a littol#elf collecting wax seals and such.. indeed... GRR i need to be finished with my current game NOWWW... i MUST work on other#thingss... aughh... ANYWAY.. yay. accomplishment to do One Single Thing other than Sit In The Summer Heat And Rot#though also hilarious as this was the first cool-ish day that was below 80F in a while hgvh#waking up like 'wow.. i actually feel okay today?? like I could do things?? how mysterious.. I wonder why..?? :0'' Its The Weather You Fool#Tis Always The Weather
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i wish i could organize a timkon giftswap or week or whatever event, but like only for people who actually care about kon as a character, without coming off as a gatekeeping asshole or something lmao
#rimi talks#i really love doing collaborative event stuff. however the horrors#timkon giftswap but in the signup form i put ''whats your favorite issue of superboy (1994)? how about robin (1993)?''#<- see that would get me branded a gatekeeper and asshole. but also hear me out............#you see........ the timkon tag is a fucking nightmare................#timkon giftswap but in the signup form i go ''lex luthor bernard dowd and jason todd are banned from this event btw''#i can't. i'm not strong enough. ksdjhfjkdhskj#but i WISH i could bc i do love events and collabs!!!! im just. SO tired of everything timkon being so shitty and ooc#bc like. the people who don't read comics latched onto timkon as The Tim Yaoi Ship™#instead of . like. reading comics and understanding why people like tim and kon's relationship to begin with#augh....... alas. i shall never run a timkon event. it simply cannot be done. but i can yearn silently in my heart
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I don't have much time to draw because of school but I managed to do some lazy drawings today.
I actually wanted to make something with colors and stuff but I just can't find any time to do that. At least this week since I have a lot of studying on my head right now. But maybe I'll manage to draw more on the weekend!!
So for now here's a usual Nerevar and Rasha thing :3
They're really fun to draw for me. I feel like I keep making both of their hair longer and longer so uh... Whoops :T
#i want to post more stuff but its hard when i have so much to do right now#im actually really exhausted from all the things i need to get done#kinda wish i could write those finals already so that i dont have to worry about them anymore#and also i just hate my school because its terrible and sucks at its job#but yeah. more stuff coming soon#tes#the elder scrolls#morrowind#tes morrowind#indoril nerevar#nerevar#nerevarine#dagoth ur#voryn dagoth#tes oc#muscariart
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never made like an organized post about it but! i do have an inprnt shop now!!
i've only added a few that people have either asked for or that i thought were Good Enough to make the initial cut. but im always happy to add more if there's like, desire for any in particular!
thats basically it! some other additional info about a couple of the pieces on there below cut that isn't. super important. hope you enjoy :3
the little miro stars were the first thing i made and the Whole Reason i made the shop initially (so i could buy them. lol) BUT there is some like. warnings re:them
a. the one i bought was the alone guy and it is. big. shes large. picture will be attached below (theyre more saturated irl). hence why i made the smaller versions in one sticker! because u can't choose sizes for stickers! the only annoying part of that is...
b. theyre not like. precut. i tried to upload the transparent version so that hopefully it Would Be but. is not. so if you do get those you do have to manually cut them out.,.. as u can probably tell by my hack job LOLL
#scheduled post if i did not fuck that up!!#i wish i could upload some of the graphic editing type stuff ive done but im Worried abt my shit getting shut down bc theyre mostly getty..#so. whatever. we move#obviously no pressure to buy anything.... she costs me nothing to have up.... just thought itd be cute + fun#yap yap yapping
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#sorry i could NOT get this out of my head when i read this ask. this is the funniest thing i have ever seen#just witnessed everybody saying that starstruck was sooo cute and soo precious in her big pink bow with her stupid little round cheeks#and ran begging into my inbox like PLEASE beat her the FUCK UP. okay!! absolutely!! as you wish it etc#i would never have actually done something this self indulgent without the prompt tbh but#joke's on you because the only characters i like throwing in the blender more than my faves are my sonas :)#you'll notice i only screenshotted it & this is not an answer to the actual ask. don't worry! it'll arrive some day#(this is jokeish in tone but i am genuinely delighted by this ask! never thought anyone would enjoy seeing stuff like that with my oc)#(always feel free to send me starstuck requests tbh!! even angst lmao. maybe i should throw her at galacta knight and see what happens)#(i think he'd just eat her whole in two bites like a strawberry cupcake ngl)
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Love being an arcane warrior in dao i love swinging a giant maul around and being in armour but also casting walking nightmare and horror on my enemies i think swords are cooler but the affect of a maul is funnier than big sword in my opinion. I have like 3 affects (at the minimum) going on at all times and then i do an aoe chug some lyrium just in case and bludgen some guy to death. What.
#dao#dragon age origins#dao surana#dragon age#i havent drawn athima in a while bc im busy w zine stuff but. you bet when im done (hopefully this week) im drawing them sm#idk theyre a silly guy#also my quest dlcs arent working? and when i look shit up it doesnt make sense#im not a tech savvy person is the issue here#anyway- athima my beloved#just met goldanna which was a bust#and im hoping i dont accidentally harden alistair idk how id do it accidentally but.#i wouldnt be surprised if i did#kimda sad you dont get to explain to goldanna that alistair did not in fact live in the royal palace#and that currently all he has is the ppl w him and the clothes on his back#since the arl is still fucked up rn#idk she assumes a lot about him and i wish you could explain stuff to her#cuz its like. i get her perspective she lives a shit life with what 5 kids?#like yeah if i thought my brother was better off than me then id want some help#however she just. assumes hes lived the worlds lushest life#when that isnt the case?#and ik its like. a part of the wholw him standing up for himself thing i think?#idk i read some stuff bc i like to know what im getting into but still be a bit surprised#so. idk man#athima is goin through it too get these guys some therapy#anyway im done rambling in my tags now
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she's beauty she's grace she's Miss Eevee Cosplay 3.0
#personal#pls don't ask me why i'm up at 2am i don't wanna talk about it#anyway i think she's mostly done maybe#i did some more work on the bangs on the wig after i took these pictures so they look better#and i might try to find some flowery earrings when i go to the store for some other stuff tomorrow#but all the major things are done. i think.#honestly i'm all over the place rn so i could be forgetting something#i keep bouncing back and forth between the one million things i have to do (con and not con-related)#anyway i usually try to do a different cosplay every day of con but idk i think i'll just wear flower eevee both saturday and sunday#bc i've put so much work into it and tbh i don't think i can handle trying to get another cosplay ready rn#the only exception would be maybe doing eevee 1.0 or 2.0 bc have everything except the wigs for those ready bc of eevee 3.0#totoro is friday bc my friends and i are doing a ghibli group!!#i wish i had a different ghibli cosplay just bc i've done totoro so much but i do love totoro and she's easy and comfy so that'll be nice#sorry shutting up now i need to go to bed i have WORK TOMORROW#cries#i should start taking off the whole week of convention lol#(no i shouldn't i should just get back in the habit of getting my cosplays done early and not con crunching -.-)
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I swear to fucking—this duel is tormenting me. Outline and all, I have been writing on this thing for a month. I'm officially shaming myself for stuffing a duel with too many plot-relevant elements, character moments, and card game actions. Somebody put a dunce hat on me.(Or pat me on the head and tell me to keep going, I am s t r u g g l i n g.)
Like. Don't get me wrong. Would I rather be doing anything else than this? No. Am I still acutely frustrated with how hard it is to juggle several structural writing threads at the same time, while weaving them together to form something coherent? YES.
#yugioh 5ds#*screeches incoherently*#I want to upload this fic more than anythingggggg#but that requires WRITING it first FUCK#and yes this is STILL about the chapter 8 duel#I'm on turn 7 out of 10. and there's still a fucking aftermath to go after that#I'm still not done because it took me ages to unfuck the duel outline#the antagonist's deck is absolutely insane#not to speak of the plot I decided to stuff in here#fucking christmas turkey-ass chapter#don't mind me I'm not actually mad I just wish I could get this done faster because I want to show you guys so badddddd hhhHHHGRHH#fic writing woes#current wip
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ah yes, spending weeks over weeks fixing my sleeping schedule and then on the day i actually wake up and don't feel like i'm about to die some random depression hits and i'm crying into my shitty game of microsoft solitaire at 1am while listening to the most random playlist at hand
#i'm dying inside but so far nobody's noticed so just keep masking 🙂#honestly i can't do this anymore#stuff#god i'm the most egocentric bitch out here i have plans with a friend tomorrow and yet i'm whining because i spent months on a project#and didn't get the appreciation i think i deserve even though it was clear up front that nobody would care#at this point it could all go to hell for all i care and honestly there are people i really wish would just die#but it's probably my fault again that it's falling apart i should've done like everyone else being numb to everything except my own little#world and secretly building up the hate while smiling into their faces
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boy in silly sitting positions compilation
#cats#I especially like the last one where he just has one single paw poking out of that box for some reason lol#I still have costumes to post and like a billion other things.... grr... constantly failing at staying active on social media aughh#I think because currently my Main Focus is on trying to get my game done and stuff.. which basically just means sitting and writing all day#so there's not much to post about. Though I know the Good At Social Media thing to do would be to post about the#writing and share progress and talk about the game and characters or whatever to try to build interest or something but that is SOOO weird#to me.. I could maybe get it if it was like a tiny tiny discord groupchat of playtesters with like 5 people in#it.. But something about talking openly about things before they happen is weird to me?? Like presumptuous feeling or something#''oooo guess whats gonna happen LATER!!!'' like.. how do you know.. what if it doesnt. what if you dont finish it. what if its not the way#you think it's going to be. what if something changes. etc. Like I literally avoid movie trailers and game trailers for the same reason ghj#Even if it's not ME doing it it just feels... weird.. Maybe it has to do with my OCD and how I just don't like talking about ''future''#things in Certain Terms. Like if I was going to say ''Oh yeah sure. come over to my house in a few months''. I would have to follow it up#with like ''HOPEFULLY you can come over to my house in a few months'' or 'They'll come over in a few months MOST LIKELY''. Because just#stating that something will happen matter of factly takes for granted like.. what if somehting horrible happens and I DONT have a house#in a few months? or what if something bad happens to me. or to the person coming over? I can't ever DEFINITELY say with 100% certainty#that one could ACTUALLY come to my house in a few months. anything could change. So I have to allot for that in my phrasing. hbjjkn#There are a lot of situations where you're expected to just Assume Things but for some reason that bothers me. My brain literally does not#even Assume the most basic things.. like how do *I* know that just because it's someones birthday that they want to be wished a happy#birthday? what if they dont? everyone is different and has different preferences. I should check with them first. or wait until they public#ly announce that theyre accepting birthday wishes. I have to allot for all 5034859069 rare possibilities at any given time and never take#anything for certain. etc. ghjbjhbh.... ANYWAY.. I have been feeling a bit sick lately as usual.. but still slowly making progress on some#things. Moslty I need to edit costume photos. make sculptures. and work on the game. Going back reading some of the old writing from like#2018 and suprisingly I don't have to change that much of it? In fact I like it mostly. so that's good. I would be very interested if I were#playing the game myself. Though that doesnt mean much since my tastes are so niche lol..#Still really want to clear some of my million tumblr drafts as well... alas and aughh and ooughh and so on and so forth. Between all of my#evil appointments other such things...why cant I have one billion dollar to retire into relaxed hermit artist life of no stressors.. bleas
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This feels obvious but maybe it's not so. The silence in Paladin Strait is. The strait. That's the crossing. He can't sing because he's schwimming. Right
#and obviously it'll be a big scene in the MV im sure but he said they wanted it to be a sonic experience first#because you're supposed to be in the paladin strait and you cross and get rewarded with the secret track#this doesnt even feel like it warrents a post im assuming everyone knows this i just think its NEAT#so i want to talk about it#twenty one pilots#clancy#tyler joseph#josh dun#there's some really interesting sound design stuff on this album that theyve never done before#like the silent break & then also the intro to vignette with the strings and the vulture cry callback#and how they crafted the album as a loop that enhances itself by Being looped#i wish they got more experimental more often in terms of song structure like i would love an ambient / field recording mixtape by tyler#or loooooong instrumental breaks#i genuinely believe tyler is on a trent reznor level of production diversity but tøp is almost strictly a verse chorus 3-5 min song band#even if they play with structure and genre within that#like i wish tyler would make some fuckin merzbow type shit im so serious i think he could. he never will though wah
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apologizing in advance for the person i will become when the next pjo show season comes out
#and the one after that etc#IM GOING TO BE SO NORMAL OK. ill be the normalest guy ever. nobodys gonna be more normal than me about this#iv. eive. been reading the pjo books (first time actually) and. I care them all so mcuh. the books ever#so so many things i cant wait to see in the show. ive been imagining how some stuff could be translated into the show as i read#im so excited ougfhhh i love these books. life changing reads and im not even really halfway done with them#i just started the third one today actually :mindblown:#i sat down just to read the first few pages before i go to sleep. and erm. i ended up sitting there reading the first ~60 pages for over#-an hour instead. Its so good man the only reason i stopped reading is bc if i dont go to sleep now ill pass out lmao#anygays i love pjo forever and ever and when the next seasons come out im going to be insufferable (/pos)#Also i feel like im always saying this but#im not actually apologizing like i said in the post. im not sorry for shit!! im having a good time#cam.txt#side note omfg i wish i didnt get so much of pjo spoiled its ruining my fun. everything couldve been so much more enjoyable#its my fault im always spoiling media for myself just bc of my insatiable need to know everything Smh. im my own worst party pooper.#a killjoy but not in the cool mcr “killjoys make some noise” way 😞😞 big ol spoilsport right here
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I had to file a missing claim with USPS on Saturday but I fear my Barnaby plush has been lost for good...
I am very sad!! I have to wait more to see if they find it, but I doubt Makeship will be able to send a replacement. (I don't think they would make extras, but who am I to say!)
Normally I am not this emotional of things, but I have been through a lot recently! My Grandpa has metastisized cancer, and we all know he doesn't have long.
I also got him for myself as an early (now late) birthday present to myself. My heart aches!! Poor puppy, lost... Lost lost puppy...
#I don't like rambling on publicly about this stuff but its been a time#and gives some explaination to where we have been!#And why we aren't very active#also other things like my partner's little sister getting back surgery yesterday#shes Okay!! We're just cleaning up the house to make things a little easier for when shes back#just a lot... so much happening...#I just miss my poor barnaby plush! I wish i could hug him#To let me snuggle a little pooch and have him crack a joke or two to make me smile#hopefully he can be found... i just worry because USPS never marked him as received from their shipping partner#auggggh#nothing to be done#its out of my hands ive done what I could#dolly's rambles#barnaby beagle#barnaby b beagle#makeship#barnaby plush
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Kusakabe, dear, you're too beautiful to be saying that kind of stuff
#jjk spoilers#All the prettiest characters were brought back from apparent death#Nobara was okay and it's true that when I read the lawyer's and Kusakabe's fights against Sukuna I thought it was being kept vague#but to pull a Nobara with all of them... idk#No one stays dead here except for the people who actually care for the kids and by that I mean 'including Yuuji'#kinda lowkey bitter about it#Don't get me wrong I like the characters and also they're super pretty but idk It makes death feel cheap? And the high stakes kinda fake?#Choso Gojo and Nanami actual only characters who died apparently#Well. Poor Itadori#And Kusukabe goes and runs his mouth that way in front of the kid. He is not entirely wrong but also he very much is#And yes he also says 'don't worry it's not for you to feel guilty over anything you're just kids' but also he did very much say that thing#about it all being Gojo's fault for not killing Itadori. In front of Itadori who feels guilty for that precisely#and in front of Megumi who asked Gojo to spare him and also went through the experience of Sukuna using his body as well#So Kusukabe's reassurance about them just being kids and not to feel guilty falls a bit empty#It does feel in character but man it truly makes one appreciate the way Gojo and Nanami dealt with the kids a lot more haha#Ui Ui seems like a dear#Anyway... this chapter felt a bit lame for the most part for me? I like the idea of the characters discussing the could have/would have#and feeling guilt and helplessness over their choices but the way it was done felt a bit lame and without any real emotional punch#It felt more like an explanation to the reader in an awkward way. And there's a lot of empty chat about guilt and grief#without any of the characters really giving off a grieving air about everything and everyone they've lost#And this is precisely what I felt was going to happen with this manga's writing haha#I truly don't understand this kind of writing choices. Contrary to some other shonen writers this author did seem to have the potential#to write this kind of thing well besides the worldbuilding and powers and fight stuff. It's truly a pity. It so breaks my heart#And still this is considered one of the good shonens. Well. WELL haha#I do think shonen can be good! I just think it falls almost always even when there's potential into bery shallow writing#I don't know. Maybe I should read that one Alchemist manga#I've been repeatedly told that one's good and it does seem like it doesn't do... this. But I find the art style so not to my linking#I wish I had never gotten into JJK for real for real. I absolutely adore it. I always end up frustrated. It could be so good. Genuinely good#And yet it's just okay in a sort of forgettable way. What a pity#Everything good ever is present but it never dares do anything to fully explore what it sets. It just does the typical shonen stuff
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theres a really. special kind of despair in the uncertainty brought about by moments of success and achievement. the inevitable “what now” of reaching your goals. and i kind of wish someone had warned me how hollow graduating university would feel, tbh
#taylor.txt#im miserable primarily for other reasons right now but i dont think i appreciated how much this just…wouldnt feel like anything#i think especially in my case as someone who so desperately needed ‘going away to college’ to get out of my childhood situation#and now for the past 5 years everything ive done has been for the purpose of getting my degree and finishing school#like im fine i guess i just kind of wish i could feel proud of myself or happy its over instead of like dreading the ceremony and feeling#like everything i have to do for grad is just one more thing i have to check off a list. getting my grad photos done felt nice but idk#it kind of feels like no one really cares which. idk why i would expect it to NOT feel that way. but yeah#tl;dr im around Kinda…need to finish stuff up but im over the really busy part of this all. kinda just coasting to the end here tbh#when this is over i’m gonna get to my request fics. prommy. wanted to do them over the long weekend but i was sick :(#anyway like to be clear im fine. people have been pointing out today i seem down and i think embarrassingly a collection of my students#noticed me crying on the bus today but thats life i guess you make do. im sad and thats ok. tbh
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