#I wish I could better explain this one!
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Death Game Stories: Part 2
I said I'd keep going, so let's keep this train going! My first post was about the PARTICIPANTS in the death game. (Please click that if you want to see part 1!) This part, therefore, will continue down my list of four parts of the death game: Gameplay!
[Image ID: The "Seek a Way Out!" screen from Zero Escape: Zero Time Dilemma. There is dynamic typography, with a graphic of an exit sign on the right and a key at the bottom. End ID.]
This one is probably the hardest to really boil down into categories like I'd want to. Even so, there are multiple types I can say to start with.
1. Kill the other participants.
This one is self-explanatory. These games often end up with a "Last Man Standing" ending, with just the protagonists alive. It's also a rather common plotline, showing up in:
Judge (manga)
Hunger Games (books)
Battle Royale (movies)
Incite Mill (manga)
Danganronpa (video game)
Future Diary (manga)
Btooom! (manga)
This plotline often ends up with a lot of fight scenes, arguments, and dead bodies. It's often impossible for everyone to live, as well-- Although some people might try. (More on that in the next post.) The main aspect of this gameplay style is this: The participants are the ones to kill the others. There can be outside motivations, but the participants must be the ones to actually kill most often.
2. Win smaller games.
This one frequently will use demented versions of well-known games. I use "games" as a loose term, as well. It's more often in money-based stories, with some examples being these:
Death Bell (movie): Multiple small puzzles.
Zero Escape (video game series): Multiple escape rooms.
Squid Game (tv show): Multiple children's games.
As the Gods Will (manga): Multiple children's games.
Die Now (manga): Variety of games.
Choose or Die (movie): Multiple choices.
Kaiji: Ultimate Survivor (anime): Multiple games.
Alice in Borderland (manga): Multiple games.
Gantz (manga): Multiple hunts.
There are so, SO many for this one. Doing multiple rounds, often with different games, is a very popular option. It's a good way to shake things up a lot, after all. However, it does take a lot of creativity to keep coming up with interesting options, so it can be difficult as well. In video games, though, this is a good way to build up the gameplay loop.
3. Survive longer than the others
There's some games where people keep getting picked off, but it's hard to say anything else about it. For some examples:
King's Game (manga)
Would You Rather (movie)
It's a bit hard to come up with more off the top of my head, but these ones are examples of where the goal is just to live a while longer.
4. Escape!
This one can be an aspect of other gameplay types as well, fun fact! In fact, it usually is. Here's a few of the ones where it shows up, and if it has another type as well.
Zero Escape (video game series) - Also a Type 2.
The Hunt (movie) - Nope.
Cube (movie) - Nope.
As the Gods Will (manga) - Also a Type 2.
Saw (movies) - Depends on the movie and the game.
Alice in Borderland (manga) - Also a Type 2.
It's a good one to include with hunters and prey, or to have a lot of traps throughout. As a general goal, though, escape makes a lot of sense, so it's frequently used as a background goal. And, as you can see... Type 2 works wonderfully with that.
~
This is just a basic list, of course! There are other ones. Sometimes, it's a single game (Ready or Not, Circle) and sometimes it's more complicated than that (Your Turn to Die). Even so, those are just some options that show up throughout pop culture to draw ideas from.
Next post: We discuss the responses of the participants. It'll be shorter than the others, but it's still an important part of the death game as a whole.
To see that, click here!
#death game#death game plotline#writing advice#writing prompts#the owl writes#the owl posts#I wish I could better explain this one!#there's so much here! it could be so cool! but it's a GIANT subject
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When you absolutely despise something a lot of people like, and no matter what way you look at it you cannot see the appeal, but you know you can’t talk about it in public or else you’ll get dogpiled to hell and back, so you just kinda sit there frothing at the mouth like this
#spaghetti speaks#minor blood#I know this image is typically used in positive contexts but it felt fitting here too#Also you probably know what I’m talking about if you’ve spoken to me before#The AM speech but aimed toward this one particular series because the rage it causes is GRAHH#it had so much potential#it could’ve been so so good#YOU COULD'VE KEPT THE PILOT PLOT INSTEAD OF INSTANTLY ABANDONING IT IN FAVOR FOR ONE OF THE WORST ROUTES A STORY CAN GO IN#I’m so mad because I WISH I could like it#I WISH I could make art for it- the character designs are fun to draw#but I’m not a fan of it#I have a visceral hatred of the series and its creator#but I’m alone in the opinion#minus my friends who agree with me#but I just#I don’t understand#I feel like if it was made by a bigger studio- people would hate it as much as me#Steven Universe was written significantly better than it- I’m sorry#SU got so much shit for years- this is praised everywhere I see#I could explain every single problem I have with this series and people will defend it#it’s so popular despite nothing being resolved or making sense#The people behind the studio were revealed to be shitty to employees but no one cares because this series got a new episode#GRRRRRGHGGHH#I hate the characters- I hate the nonsensical plot- I hate the plot holes- I hate the villain- I hate the wasted potential#I’d hijack this series and make a Snoot Game type thing if I could- my autistic ass will make this better#I'm not arrogant I’m just saying the writing is on the floor and it doesn’t take much to just fix it up and make it pretty#I’m ranting#sorry#I’m very passionate about things like this#Inorganic killers
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Episode 3 of Dead Boy Detectives is the best one yet. The murder is absolutely brutal, but it's tightly plotted and has so many great character moments throughout.
This is the most attached to Charles I've felt so far. He's currently furthest down my list of favourites out of the main cast, but his performance was really moving this episode. I also loved how it highlighted his relationships both with Crystal and Edwin, and the jealousy that Edwin feels there. Interesting that that jealousy seems to go both ways, too, with Charles being the last to leave Edwin and Monty alone at the end.
Edwin and Charles are unlikely friends in a lot of ways, but I do buy it, especially when he occasionally makes Edwin smile. Here, Edwin is confronted with the fact that he actually doesn't know many of the deeper parts of Charles' life, and that he maybe hasn't shared all of his own. Really nicely done.
Edwin's sexuality crisis continues to be really compelling. I actually adore his dynamic with Monty. I know he's literally a plant by Esther, but their tiny interactions so far have so much chemistry. I also have Thoughts on why Edwin is more open to him than the Cat King, and it's the plausible deniability of it all. The Cat King was extremely upfront about what he wanted from Edwin, and Edwin could not quite bring himself to admit he even understood what that was. Whereas with Monty he's able to retreat behind his protests that "he is a boy and I am a boy, if anything he just enjoys ghosts".
Also! Crsytal and Edwin are becoming friends!!! Crystal's my second favourite character and I'm so happy they're warming up to each other. Edwin is such a spiky character but I love him and want everyone else to love him. On that note, him being understanding to Niko about her trauma also made me very happy. Edwin is not budging as my favourite character!
Small things:
Esther continues to have the best, most over the top performance. Perfect, no notes.
Niko yaoi enjoyer and general weirdo, I love her so much <3
#dead boy detectives#the case of the devlin house#edwin paine#oh no I'm gaining a new blorbo#he's just my type too: repressed and/or uptight gay#if only all my repressed uptight gay blorbos from different media could become friends#I am getting more and more into this show and I'm so glad#because I spent most of the first episode being really annoyed I didn't like it more#I still wish they'd done a better job in episode 1 but it's so good now! I'm completely hooked!#I'm enjoying going through it at a measured rate rather than bingeing it all in one night#also crystal's preeeetty#still hard for me to remember they're supposed to be teenagers lol#let them be adults! it's not like they're at school!#dbd#mine#dbd mine#reactions#edwin#I love when my reaction posts are me explaining my thoughts eloquently in detail#in stark contrast to my actual bearing#just know that re: all of the Edwin bits I am actually squealing and happy flapping
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"Vampire in the Garden" is underrated and I wish there were more episodes or seasons!
This beautiful hidden gem did NOT need to stab me so HARD in the HEART! 😭❤
#I only wish it lasted a little longer so the story could be explained a little better but...damn...damn that one made me cry!#vampire in the garden#anime#vampires#gothic#lgbtq stories
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Quit being transphobic and adding the asterisk to make it say trans men* and trans women*. It's 2023. I thought we were past this.
This is probably about my post about trans women and trans men exchanging advice since it's been gaining traction, and I add the asterisk to signal that this isn't just about trans women and trans men. As somebody who isn't solely a trans man, it's weird to me that people have almost demanded that I just... ignore that, because it "isn't close to cisness." I added the asterisk for brevity and to signal that it's also about transfem people, transmasc people, transneutral people, genderqueers, genderfreaks, and whomever else I am not mentioning (memory loss gang, rise with me on this one).
Maybe you aren't a fan of how I indicated that difference (which is not what I have an issue with), but I truly do not appreciate being told that me acknowledging that trans men and trans women aren't the only people in this community is transphobic. If you aren't a fan of the asterisk, don't use it because that's completely neutral. But don't go after trans people who use it for literally non-transphobic reasons. Trans women and trans men are important members of the community, but they are not the only people who are trans in this space.
This will be my only response about this because I do think an explanation of my thought process in that post and posts like this would be helpful. But I'm drawing a firm boundary with how I'm talked to. This type of engagement is incredibly upsetting to me, and while I understand the aversion you may have to my language, I'm not going to be okay with being spoken to like this.
#ask#anon#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#transphobia#transphobia tw#wish it were more common on the internet to go 'could you explain [x]' instead of 'how DARE you do [x] for this reason i made up'#and maybe anon that isn't what you intended but i'm not sure how else to read this#i would understand your anger more if i didn't have a long track record of trying to be as sensitive about trans inclusion as possible#and i know i can be better about that! which is why i've been really fluid in my language and understanding of others#anyway being talked to like this is one of my firmest boundaries. definitely brings up terrible memories
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the amount of ppl who have lied to me about their age and then used my kindness to their advantage truly makes me want to delete this account
#🔪 - mello talks too much#cw vent#i wish i could explain to u guys how many times minors have contacted me without me knowing they are one#it makes me just not want to make mutuals/trust any ppl on this app#and im just so#fuck#bc whenever i see the tell tale signs of behaviors of children i just brush it off bc i trust ppl too easy and think im overreacting#its happened multiple times#and im just#for the love of god if u are lying about your age (which honestly i assume a lot are) pls dont try and contact me or have a relationship#with me#and its just so hard bc the first thing i think when i find out is “they are just a kid. they dont know any better” but idk..#makes me sick to my stomach
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Having very big thoughts about spirituality and humanity.. alas I am never articulate enough so I'm just gonna rent in the tags as always
#IDK#like also im from Quebec and the relation to spirituality/religion here is strange#i wish i could have a conversation with someone about it 😭#and like spirituality is such an important part of the human experience?#hhh idk how to explain what im feeling but#anyways.#im very thankful to have found faith in my life i believe it is making me a better person#a year ago i discovered one of my best friend has very bad religious trauma#her point of view on any and all spirituality was really bad (still sort of is)#but to completely dismiss religion in regard to human life is not the way!!#i was glad to explain to her what religion meant to me and like yea i did grow up thinking religion was a little stupid#but that was because all i was taught about religion was through christian lenses#i truly love discussing with religious people about our beliefs and how it affects our day to day#like my old colleague who was muslim was always happy to talk to me about Islam and her name-sake Aisha#like idk#idk ok!!#spirituality can be very beautiful and i have many feelings about it
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Everytime I face a new character limit on a website that didn't have them before/used to have really long ones... AUGHHhhh the modern social media world was not made for people like me (lovers of details, rambling, elaboration, thorough explanation, and nuance)
#twitter and other short form shit and everything being a Phone App On Small Screen instead of a Proper#Computer Website i feel like has just ruined the format of literally everything for me. Thoughts just keep getting more and more condensed#with detail and nuance taken away. everything over simplified into only the basics. blah blah blah. I've already probably rambled about thi#all before but it's just SO frustrating. I literally just CAN NOT talk that way!!! even if I try!!! I took multiple advanced placement#english & language arts classes in school and I literally never made below an A on any assignment EVER except for ESSAYS#where I would legit get almost failing grades just because I cannt express myself concisely. I took an english placement test thats made to#like evaluate your competency in a subject and out of the 102 multiple choice questions I only missed TWO of them. almost a perfect#score. But for the 5 open response questions (about articulating thoughts succinctly) I did not get a single one of them lol#I only got partial credit on 3. It's like I OBVIOUSLY understand the material and I know how Words Work and how to analyze and interpret#meaning and etc. etc. But it's just when I have to express myself CLEANLY I can't. It's always ''well you have very good points and you#get around to the idea eventually and I think it's very insightful - but it just needs to be shorter/the side tangent needs to be removed/#etc.'' I've always wondered if it has something to do with being on the schizophrenia spectrum and how that can cause disorganized#speech sometimes hmm..ANYWAY.. But I just naturally express myself in a very particular way which is lengthy and I can't rea#ly seem to control it. So it's basically like just.. being gradually pushed out of every place that won't accomodate people with different#ways of like perceiving and expressing or etc. Everything cannot ALWAYS be 100% 'Short and Snappy and To The Point' or a quippy one#liner or the Bare Minimum of information being provided or etc. Some peoples brains just do not work like that!!!!! Sorry I operate#in detail and elaboration lol. ANYWAY.. I still sometimes use random ''dating sites'' like OKCupid to look for platonic friends since#I never leave the house so it's hard for me to just meet friends naturally. And I just realized today that they added a RIDICULOUSLY small#character limit to their messaging system (2000 words?? augh). And also took away answer explanations (when you answer a compatibility#question you used to have a space to give detail and explain why you answered the way you did) and removed a few other features and it's ju#t like.. how the fuck is any of this actually helpful in terms of judging compatibility? take away ALL nuance and anyting that actually#is meant to tell you anything about a person? Bumble's character limits for your profile description are even more fucking insane and so#is every other disgustingly minimalistic place I've seen like.. OKC used to be superior BECAUSE it allowed for a TON of detail. like back i#2016 or something there was SO much data you could look at. long form question answers. personality trait summaries. etc. Now you have#SOO little to judge off of when evaluating compatibiility it's like. You'd have better luck just throwing a dart in a crowded street and#talking to whoever it hits. Why are people so fucking allergic to reading anything longer than 3 words and providing DETAILS!! It just seem#harder and harder to find any place to meet platonic friends where you have any amount of actual data to go off of and it isnt basically#just random 'speed dating' set up shit. AARGH. &I know 'oh just join a club& meet ppl irl' 1. erm..covid. 2.I mostly want to meet ppl#in places I'd like to move so I already know ppl when I get there. You kind of HAVE to do that online. bc I am not there yet.. WISHING for#Complexity.Com where ppl can upload full 900 page psychological files of themselves. MINIMUM profile character limit 30k words lol
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Some contemplations on the matador au...sorry, I'm like a child with a new toy 😭(I've not abandoned my other stuff btw obv but at certain point, it gets a bit hard to build an AU cause I'm like, I have so many ideas but idk how to post them in a cohesive way???? So it's a bit more relaxing and fun to play with a new one for a bit bcs everything is new :) )
This au mostly exists bcs I rly like drawing ornate things, such as the matador costume. But I've been thinking a lot lately abt the actual content of it. Vettonso(of course.) I have a few ideas abt the actual avenue of it. I have one main one, and then two jokey ones.
○
The first(and actual) one would be the original thought that both of them are matadors. And Seb retires after injury(btw jfc bullfighting injuries are such body horror. The one guy I was researching was impaled in the skull and lost his eye and some of his hearing. But he came back to bullfighting, and at some point was impaled in the chest and injured his lung. And still kept competing I think??? Somehow there's athletes more insane than f1 drivers, shocking, I know.)
I think Fernando would be renowed for his resilience and Seb for his agility. And both for their exceptional showmanship and flair 🤭 There's actually more than just matadors! Seb would prob start off as Fernando's assistant, a banderillero(kind of an assistant to the matador. They stick these flag things in the bull, and have to be super agile and fast.) And then becomes a matador in his own right(surpassing Fernando's achievements????) But as mentioned, gets a pretty bad injury and has to retire. But he still feels a lot of admiration and respect for Nando and comes to watch his matches. And Fernando *always* dedicates his kill to Seb, throwing his hat at him, hoping he'll one day come back. Seb is like: "what do I do with this box of hats..." Fernando is crying in the corner bcs he's lost a lot of his motivation.
It's really !!!!! to think about their suit designs and the evolution of it. They're pretty united when Seb is Fernando's assistant(Nando wearing light blue with gold, Seb darker blue with silver.) And then Seb becomes a matador(dark blue and gold), and Fernando suddenly changes his suit to bright red(he is upset, he is seeing red, haha get the bull joke?) Seb would start wearing that circa 2010 bull hat after successful matches, thus cementing himself as the "red bull" and Fernando, his rival, "bull-killer." They're not directly competing, but thematically they are. In traditional bull matches, there's 3 matadors vs 6 bulls. So vettonso are often in the same matches, indirectly competing against each other, but fighting to have the most flair and success. Fernando sees defeating Seb to be just as important as defeating the actual bull. He slays the bull, and then conquers the other.
Sobbing to imagine Fernando abandon his hatred for Seb after witnessing him getting injured. Cradling his bloody, torn up body. Pressing his hat to Seb's chest, soaking up his blood with his own cape. By that point, Seb had had a dark green suit. And ever since he retired, Fernando now wears the same shade, as an homage to his once great rival, dedicating every kill that Seb never got to have to the man himself.
Hahaha okay silly versions:
Two is just bullfighter!Fernando being driver Seb's wag 😭
Everyone notes the irony of him being a Red Bull driver who constantly has bull iconography(2010 bull hat, petting the bull on his car, "riding" the bull at the end of 2012, etc.) dating a man who kills bulls for a living. But it turns out Fernando is the only one who can tame the bull 🤭, and also Seb is the only bull he can't bring himself to kill. Seb makes a helmet for the Spanish gp based on the embroidery of Fernando's suit. Fernando tries to incorporate Seb's logo and rbr logo somewhere on his cape. They share a trophy shelf 🥰 and Fernando brings one of his hats to the Spanish gp to publicly bestow upon Seb.
The third is so stupid 😭 Basically: Seb becomes the human physical manifestation of one of the bulls Fernando is meant to kill, and tries to seduce him into leaving the bullfighter life. So he's a bull-boy: tails, ears, horns and all 😏 So Fernando comes home from a match, and Seb is there, kneeling, when he opens his front door. Fernando now must conquer a bull in a *different* way. Bull-boy out who is out to ruin your livelihood by seductively splaying himself across every surface in your house and encouraging you to tug on his septum ring, and forget that you have a match to go to this weekend, and wouldn't you rather enjoy a bull rather than kill one?
#please take my horrible brainrot#i get really obsessed w things and cant let them go and then write things like these.....#theres just so much metaphor abt Fernando being a bullfighter and seb literally being a red bull#kinda what i was getting at with my last drawing#seb just likes to be silly and coy(i.e wearing the bull hat to display that hes conquered the bull)#whereas fernando now takes it way too seriously and has to conquer more than one bull#seb feels akin to the bull. he understands the bull. the psychology of it. he respects it#just many things to think abt 🤔#the other two are just silly thoughts that i like a lot though 🤭#sry i wish i could explain better but its just taking me over so badly rn#im just like: RED BULL x BULL FIGHTER GET IT GET IT GET IT?????#f1#vettonso#catie.rambling.txt#matador!nando
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Oh my god HOW DID YOU LIKE SVSSS!!!!!
i liked it more than i thought i would but overall less than i might have given the potential of the story, i think in general i really enjoyed the characters (mxtx never goes wrong with characters, she creates them in a way that makes me feel unhinged) and the world building but the pay off to the set up—which i really liked!—felt a bit........ i mean, just alright.
the dynamics too are pure mxtx, personally the bin/gqiu dynamic specifically really was the least interesting part of the whole story. to me!! but individually i loved both characters. my interest was just elsewhere because """elsewhere""" felt way more fascinating idk how to explain it
was very, very happy about the extra with airplane and the yue qingyuan / shen jiu one because that's exactly what i wanted more of in the story itself as well as just more shen yuan/qingqiu interacting with cang qiong mountain
maybe it's my orv brain but like i told jana a while back i think i would have enjoyed svsss way more if it was more about shen yuan (loner; hater; etc) suddenly finding himself among all of these people (disciples looking up to him; sect siblings relying on him one way or another; common folk admiring him; etc etc) and starting to.... live? again?
Shen Qingqiu hadn't noticed that, unconsciously, he no longer considered the disciples around him (...) to be mob characters the novel had described in a scant number of words.
^from volume one, he starts seeing them almost immediately because he's not actually that separate and he genuinely cares. all the time. about everything. even before that we get:
This was only a book, and all the people were constructs, imaginary characters. Logically, Shen Qingqiu was very clear on this fact...but when a character was actually being taunted and bullied right before his eyes, it was just flat-out unrealistic to expect him to be completely unmoved.
like why are you lying, shen yuan (<- svsss tagline if there ever was one)
just the idea of this really lonely detached guy finding a community, i know it's not the story mxtx was trying to tell but again, with the set up i really wanted to see it go in that direction.
there's one line from vol two where liu qingge goes "you fear becoming a burden to cang qiong mountain (...) but cang qiong mountain fears not your burden"
and basically what i'm saying is that i wish the story had been about THAT
(and also ning yingying's lines in that same chapter about shizun always taking on everything himself and why is it always you like that whole moment with the cang qiong mountain almost begging him to see that they care. idek what i'm saying but you know)
(also foaming at the mouth that we only got tiny tiny glimpses of shen yuan's life from before, those handful of times he mentioned his siblings i wanted to take a bite out of my kindle. tell me more!! dear fucking lord tell me more!! keep talking! elaborate!! he really felt very "kim dokja and his fourth wall" at times, sorry once more about the orv brain)
tldr: i guess i wanted a story about shen yuan/qingqiu but mxtx created svsss to be a story about bin/gqiu. and i just have to be okay with that.
#does this make any sense? no. am i still hitting ''post''? yes. sorry kay#fra.txt#fra.xml#pathos-logical#overall i quite enjoyed obsessive lu.o bin.ghe. so intense and possessive about the one person who showed him a little kindness#(so what if he also showed him a lot of pain too here and there?)#but like i said the bin.gqiu dynamic just didn't pull me in. of course to each their own#(''one person'' but poor yingying was trying to help him since day one.)#but also..... to me it felt like his arc was the least satisfying. he just.... is. whereas most everyone else seems to evolve more tangibly#right now i can't help but think of tianlang-jun. ''i can't bring myself to hate humans''#not to mention all the women from his harem becoming characters in their own right#i wish i could explain myself better but i don't have the words. sorry!#l.uo bin.ghe you ARE interesting i just feel like your story could have been more#as an apology here's my favorite line of yours: ''I don't want you to repay me. I just couldn't get over my anger''#see?? i pay attention to you too baby boy#i should re-read all of ^^^ that but i won't </3#edit: one thing i forgot to mention is that i did like the small snippet we got of bin/g-ge reacting to shen yu.an/qin.gqiu#like now that's something that immediately caught my eye it already made for such a more fascinating dynamic.#also i've seen a few things about shen yua.n (not trasmigrated) getting to meet bin.ghe/bin.g-ge and again that i would take a peak at#fully black lotus bin/g-ge coming face to face with shen ''i'm a hater but also can't help but be kind all the time'' yu.an truly pickles#my tickle. i'm sat. i'm listening. i'm compelled.
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they werent lying that knuckles series barely has knuckles in it
#i pirated that shit Btw just so we're clear. also gonna talk about it a little bit in the tags#nothing too spoilery but also might not wanna read if you want to go in knowing absolutely nothing? idk#anyway he WAS a main character still he was present for a decent amount of the first couple episodes#but the amount of screentime he gets just starts dropping after that . hes barely there at all in the second half ???#and it feels like theres a lot of scenes mostly focusing on wade and his problems and not near as many for knuckles and his whole deal#overall it feels more like a wade show with knuckles in it than a knuckles show with wade in it. which sucks#and human characters having plot relevance isnt the problem here i dont mind human characters at all i think they can be really fun#its the fact that the human characters are taking over the story and spotlight when the show is called knuckles#and all the marketing makes it look like knuckles is the main focus#and i also would have preferred if they just went with a differnet character to be knuckles' human friend#because i dont particulraly care about wade. and the knuckles (and sonic and tails) i know would not be friends with cops </3#well at least the story wasnt knuckles training wade to be a better cop like a lot of people were expecting but thats like.the bare minimum#also aside from the issues relating to knuckles' screentime (or lack of screentime) i thought the ending was unsatisfying#regardless of all that though there WERE some parts i enjoyed or found kind of funny or whatever. because knuckles so cutesy as always#knuckles being a cute little guy is the most important part of the show actually#and i liked the parts with sonic tails and maddie even if they were only there for like 5 minutes#(i really wish those three had gotten more screentime. i feel like they could have easily worked in at least one more scene with them)#and its a minor thing but the opening sequence is cute. was honestly expecting just a title card or something#overall the show is just . kind of okay i guess. not the worst thing ive ever seen but still disappointing ? idk how to explain..#my expectations also werent very high in the first place#so maybe im being a bit more generous than i would have been otherwise. idk#and i definitely would not recommend this to anyone who already dislikes the sonic movies . youll probably hate this more#like people who thought the human characters got too much screentime in the second movie would lose their minds if they saw this
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not entirely sure how it works but I’ll go ahead and headcanon that Frey and Susurrus are intertwined at the soul now. So what happens to Frey happens to him. So if she dies he goes with her.
#i’m making myself sad ignore me#but also their intertwining in the last chapter just seems so permanent to me#i really like the glow on frey’s arm after she captures his last bird and absorbs him#it looks like it took a while to bind them (that’s why i’m assuming bc the golden glow miasma doesn’t go away in the cutscene)#all this to say i think it’s a fitting punishment#if you can even call it that#at least now his prison is a place that could be called home#i would think it’s better than the labyrinths which is where I would have put him#cuff is the largest threat to athia even after destroying 99% of its populace via their tantas#i really wish they’d explain frey’s immunity#but i’m chalking it up to two things: one she’s the daughter of a tanta and two she was already inside cinta when cuff bonded with her#makes me wonder if frey ever thought something about cuff was familiar#maybe she’s always known that voice somehow someway#vikky plays forspoken
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I would just like to apologize to all the people I’ve ghosted in this past year. I promise I never stopped caring about you. Unfortunately, when I’m exhausted, social interactions are the first thing to go, and I have been exhausted for so long I’ve forgotten what energy is
#I still see ur messages and love you#I just cannot engage in a conversation without feeling sick to my stomach with the effort and wanting to die#I talk to maybe one person regularly.#I promise it’s not you even my closest friend will be ghosted for days on end if I can’t muster the response#hemera rambles#I just feel bad bc y’all deserve better#I just can’t be what you want me to be rn#I wish I could explain it better#but idk I’d rather think of u fondly than yell at you for responding to me whenever I dare send a text to let you know I’m thinking of you#I don’t want to get pissy bc ur trying to be a good friend#so I just don’t engage at all
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i hate my uncontrollable need to analyze everything. my inability to only partially devote myself to things that will never be a constant. being too little or too much, exacerbating or not quite enough. i have roused myself with the guise of our friendship, acknowledging now that's all it can be. rejecting my kindness, while bringing tenfold your own. like magnets we push and we pull, all based upon the way in which we chose to orient ourselves that day.
#semicolons as commas as a headsup if you care to read my tags#yes this is about my ex.#he broke up with me but we're still friends#told him i think i may have pmdd and he researched it IMMEDIATELY before i had the chance to explain#on our first date i mentioned a condition his sister may be experiencing due to the symptoms he mentioned and he seemed disinterested in +#looking it up#(whether thats bc it was a first date or not; i'm not sure)#he offers me endless support and appears to care for me deeply#mojo pin always makes me think of him whenever i listen to it... its just so him.#on monday he hugged me when i told him i was experiencing severe anxiety again for the first time in years#(even though my shoulders were touching my ears; he just wanted to help me feel better :<)#we can have serious; adult conversations with little difficulty. even our breakup was relatively clean and easy all things considered#no 'you' statements. no attacking one another like i've always seen.#how is it that the first boyfriend i get is calm; collected; emotionally mature and smart and it has to end#i'm not even that much of a romantic when it comes to lifelong partners; but he seriously had me considering it as an option.#he even apologized for not listening to me fully when i grumbled that he hadnt and reexplained a situation to him. like!?!?#GRAGHHFHDJDIDJD i wish i could just hate him.
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asking whoever came up with quotes in academic papers for their hand in marriage, i love filling up my word count with quotes that explain my point so i don’t have to and they make me look so well read too, we shall have a spring wedding my love
#i loathe going ‘this person said this’ and just pharaphrasing when i can use a quote instead it’s quicker and easier and explains the point#better - i will go ‘this person thought this’ if it’s explaining more of an overarching idea or theory but for something that can be told#in a quote? baby it’s going in there#i just split one long quote in 3 parts and sprinkled it in my thesis because i wanted to use it all and in there and god i love that for me#i am also currently dying over this don’t get me wrong#i’ve had debilitating headaches for the last week writing this because i decided i could write the entire thing and do most of the research#in like a week :/// i’ve come to the conclusion my hubris got the better of me and this is in fact not comparable to any other paper i’ve#written for uni it just isn’t#anyways i have 7k och my minimum 10k word count and my deadline is friday at 5pm so wish me luck#im hoping i get it done tonight and then tomorrow i can do edits and email my professor and ask if i actually can still turn it in even tho#i missed turning it into my advisor last friday#i was not made for uni i wasn’t but for now i keep trying#the worst part is i actually do find all this so interesting i just hate the restrictions and rules i have to follow#dels endless rambles
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Tonight is a My Love is Sick night .
#੭﹕ ̊ ̟ ꒷꒦ . . scratching#vent#Sometimes I feel a little scared I even feel too much for yanblr. . .#I know I'm probably wrong but . it's hard#I feel like I love like a monster#obsessive. selfish. all encompassing.#I sort of wish soulmates were real#so it could just . be over and it would be perfect and I couldn't scare them away#and they wouldn't pick someone else over me#I feel like I love the same way a dragon does .#If I wasn't so lightheaded I would explain but . trying not to cry is taking it out of me#but !! hopefully whoevers taking time to read this#if anyone is that is#knows a bit about dragons#It is 2 am. . . This could just be . one of those nigts but I am upset nonetheless#Anyway. . . My Love is Sick is a good album#even better to cry too
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