#I will probably post snippets or doodles later

[rockabyedaisy]

Fanfic Idea: Ever After High Christianity Au

So I’ve been thinking alot about a possible Au where the all the characters were in a very christian/catholic setting.

I first got this idea like a year ago when I listened to this song. (Please listen, it’s so good!”

“Can we say goodbye to, to the lies you told.”

“I believed your stories, at least the blind in me, You gave my eyes what they wanted to see”

“You act like your god and you’re trying to hard, but I need it. I was supposed to believe her, now I’m back to believing.”

Apple is confronting her mother for all the lies she has been told. How if everyone remained pure, fair, and good, everyone will have a chance in heaven and God will love all. But things changed for apple, things she has witnessed has made her realize she put her faith in the wrong hands of her mother and older authorities in her church. She is finally putting a stand against them for her and her friends, while also re examining her relationship with god without denouncing herself as a christian.

What if that was a story. Apple, the most devoted of them all, realizing the toxic influence and chokehold not only her mother, but their church have on everyone and their children. Raven, an atheist, looking to expose the hyprocrisy and corruption of the church and show how it has harmed not only her and her mother, but also the children who she and Apple goes to school with. Milton, old fashioned and strict headmaster and priest of a prestigious and religious boarding school, battling with a teenager over the principles of what is right and wrong. Dexter, Ashlynn, Lizzie, and everyone else’s lives are about being manipulated, abused, and exploited as well as how they deal with it or rebel from it in their own ways.

This story will tackle subjects of religious trauma, femininity , early marriage/engagements, abuse, mental illness, christian family dynamics, generational trauma (Yeah I know it sound like a whole ass series, and it could be)

I saw how more people are talking about Apple and Raven having metaphoric religious trauma, and I was so motivated to move forward with this idea and wanted to say something like, “OK, but what if it was literal, …and worse.” :D✨

[filipofmounthonora]

first year vs fourth year

aka im back in sge mode heyyyyy 😭 just doodling some (mostly soon to be featured) characters from my prequel / young callis+arthur series (i know its kind of old BUT. i AM working on the next installment which is probably going end up 3x as long 💀 stay tuned for wip posting. and callis posting 🥰)

ummm random ideas / explanations under the cut:

gareth and gaheris are arthur's cousins (gaheris is 15 (1 year older than arthur), gareth is 12) and both in his class. they generally dislike arthur for various reasons but mostly because they think he's cursed + stole the crown from his brother

callis is gareth's best friend. he is Not hers. he might also be in love with her but that is a tale for another time. you'll see

george (or grog) and alek are callis's roommates (alek is barely 16, george is turning 12). they both got into evil technically by nepotism. you'll see

it will be Ages before i can properly explain why lesso's name is completely different in this series so ill just say it here. its quite silly actually but its been this way for Years and Years so "leonora" is actually a portmanteau name of her first nickname (nora) and a second nickname (leo). the road to nickname 2 will be a long one paved with the power of friendship and not dying in the trial by tale etc etc. you'll see

emma is a surprise tool we will use later or something. she's not relevant after first year or so but im doing my own spin on her not being asked to the snow ball but somehow not being failed. what i'll say now is that callis and gareth are involved. you'll see

uhhh and if you're reading this have a snippet

[khairosclerosis]

🍊 called to the devil and the devil did come,

i said to the devil, ' devil, do you like drums? '

' do you like cigarettes, dominoes, rum? '

he said ' only sundown, sundays, christmas '

(rambling under the cut 🌱)

...

yeah okay so maybe the family prompt for the aa doodle challenge was yesterday but help girl i got this idea at 9pm okay . i've decided i'm only doing 1-2 per week anyway bc i've never finished a full one of these before lol 😭 anyway anyway me and friend pm just have this headcanon we're so ill completely normal about. no it has nothing to do with why we're orange themed why would you suggest that. anyway have a snippet of this fun conspiracy board they made that'll probably be clearer than me attempting to explain anything

...

...

so yea i might finish this later but for now i'm just posting for the challenge and also you Get it right? you get it. if not then you will Soon. me when the love was there etc. lies down on the floor ,

- 🌿

[miles-crow]

I swear it's not a Hadestown reference

That's a poppy, not red carnation ;)

As strange as it may seem I actually don't have a lot of Demeter concepts. I showed some thumbnails in last post and you're getting a small snippet here too, but that's all. Why? Well... I attempted to design her three years ago. That drawing (there's no way I'm showing it to you) & classic 1998 design for Demeter were the basic foundation here. Since her name is directly taken from the greek mythology, I gave her a greek style dress, assymetrical and light, but with tabby like stripes. She's soft at edges, with hairstyle inspired by Olivia Newton-John. You can notice that some of her features form little hearts. Now, about the poppy. Wheat (gold details), poppy (flower) and mint (leaves) are the symbols of the goddess Demeter. We all know about Demeter's rough relationship with Macavity. Here's a thing: in Polish version of 'Cats' Macavity is usually called 'Makiawel' and 'mak' is a Polish word for... Poppy.

Bombalurina was SO MUCH fun to design. Everyone who's in Cat Call (Tugger's band) has a different rock aesthetic. Tugger is, of course, classic rock, but for Bomba I've decided to try glam rock. Main inspiration behind her was a fem band called Vixen and Janet Gardner's awesome hair. Regarding her relationship with Tugger - 'Edge of a Broken Heart' could be her theme at this point. She's much more sharper than her sister, much more wild in design and... I'm not entirely satisfied with her. The neon green was supposed to be a nice 80s touch, but I will probably revisit her design later, just like I did with Tugger.

Now, doodle time ft. old Tugger's design.

Oh, still here? Have some brothers (with cameo of @/whatavery's oc in bg), sneak peek of Alonzo (he's...next?) and concept for future drawing.

Additional info:

Both girls were based on Somali cat breed.

Demeter is 30. Bombalurina is 24.

[kelkilou]

Sorry for the lack of art lately - I got a part time job recently!! I'm finally getting used to my new schedule and things are slowing down for christmas too so hopefully I'll be able to start posting more regularly.

Part of my backlog - just some doodles I did of Myra and Gene together! Including a little snippet of when they met ;u; He spots her drowning her sorrows while he works at a local bar! (I may expand the lore on that later??)

I figure even though Gene likes old movies and tech, he still uses and keeps up to date with things in the modern era. Myra, on the other hand...Let's just say she probably isn't fond of them :')

Also purely for this gag page I see Gene having the *smallest* bit of pyrokinesis. But it literally only gets him as far as lighting a cigarette and he doesn't like using it much beyond that.

[slenderofthewildcard]

UPDATED INTRO THINGY MA JIGGER!!!! Ace is helping with making it not look like shit like my last one! I'm simply here to keep things organized so Wildcard doesn't get distracted, apologies for the intrusion.

=General information=

Aliases: Wildcard, idiot, dumbass, Wc, ne m'oublie pas fleur (BY ACE!), eldest sib. I don't think the insults need to be included. THEY'RE ENDEARMENTS ACE!

NEVER USE: Joker, don't use that name anymore f!@#ers! Slurs should also be avoided please. (OOC Mod will be a bit more strict with asking the name Joker to not be used please /lh it is for Mod's comfort.)

Pronouns: She/he/they, card/cards, dice/dice's, luck/luck's, chaotic/chaotic's. Whatever the f!@# else no preference any and all these are just the main shit.

A 9ft tall (MINUS HEELS) land shark based slenderbeing with a cool as shit fashion sense! Please get more clothes dear....you can not just wear that one outfit. Watch me! I have a f#$%ing dozen of em!

Trans masc, pangender, aroace (maybe cupio f@#$ if I know and apothi) demi-queerplatonic and grayplatonic. Platonic partners with Ace! (I am generally referred to as Pink, but hello.) and eldest sibling to the suits!

I F@#$ING LOVE GIFTS AND TRINKETS GIVE EM HERE!!! Cards and dice and shiny shit! I will take anything you f!@#ers give me!

Hey f!@#ers! I'm the f!@#ing WILDCARD!!

Mess with the sibs or those I give a shit about, you mess with me.

Dealer at THE suits casino, I like to shake it up every now and again, everything in life's a f@#$ing gamble, all in the cards.

So....what d'ya say?

Wanna make a bet with a Wildcard Doll?

OOC Mod status: Slow but answering when I have the energy ^_^

OOC under cut.

This blog is a slendlr roleplay blog.

General rules and info:

Mod is not a minor but would appreciate asks be nothing more then suggestive, flirting is allowed with Wildcard but luck is as dense as a rock.

Mod uses pink/pinks/pinkself and xe/xem/xyr pronouns.

Magic anons are allowed. General rule of thumb, be nice, don't be bigoted and any hate will be deleted

(You are allowed to be mean to Wildcard and to bother them within reason as long as it's clear its for in character and not just to be a jerk to people like Mod or others. It is in fact encouraged you snark Wildcard its amusing.)

Shipping is also allowed.

If something is said or done in character that makes you uncomfortable or is too much during an interaction PLEASE let me know.

Blog may sometimes cover topics such as violence, death, cannibalism, threats, biting, and censored swearing (and probably other things...). Things will be tagged as needed.

Fun stuff and mentioned Characters above outside this blog:

100 faces meme list (For doodles, Wildcard and Pink are both options for this)

Slendlr writing asks (For writing prompts with Wildcard)

A03 where mod sometimes puts slendlr oneshots and lore snippets

Wc's Voice (Attempt) (OLD)

Wc's voice claim (updated)

Together with you Animatic (Wildcard, Pink and Icelandic animatic :3)

Ace/Pink - @/pinkslenderfolk

THE SUITS

Hearts - (who is not available anymore I believe) @/slenderofhearts

Diamond - @/slenderofdiamonds

Spade - @/slenderofspades

Club - @/slenderofclubs

Tags list:

slendlr - general fandom tag

the wildcard - general tag

friend of the wildcard (used for an interlude when Pink was a messenger for Wildcard and anytime ey post on here) - general tag

make a bet - ask tag

ooc post/mod post - out of character posting by mod

mod answers - out of character ask answered by mod

(Additional tags for when Mod remembers to use them....will be edited in later for older posts))

ace - tag for asks/start of interactions with Pink in chara

the suits - tags for asks/start of interactions with wildcards sibs in chara

kingsley - Wildcard's cat

Lore events are sometimes also tagged with set tags but i do not remember them all (usually under the influence of magic anons ex. cheesed wildcard, etc)

Wildcard's text will always be red.

Non red text that's not listed as being Mod/ooc is for Kingsley, Wildcard's cat.

[mac-lilly]

JATP fic ideas that live rent-free in my head

A compilation post to keep track of all the jatp stories that I will never write ...

Stuff I've actually written

Juke:

Juke Kitchen

Alone Together

Strumming the Soul

Beautiful

Heartbeat

Willex:

Hotdog and Cold dog

Cross my heart and hope to die (again)

A night to remember:

Just one more night (Luke)

Tomorrow (Reggie)

Ghostwriter:

Snippet 1

Snippet 2

Snippet 3

Hamster!Luke

Doodle

Canon-Compliant (kinda)

The inevitabilities of (after)life

(Boys coming back to life but without memories - Juke)

After their performance at The Orpheum, the guys suddenly start seeing a magical light, and they figure it's time to cross over. Before they leave, however, Julie and Luke accidentally seal a magical pact with unfathomable consequences. (And they kiss.) And then the boys are gone.

However, a year later, just after coming to terms with the guys' departure, Julie's world is turned upside-down (again) when a very alive Luke suddenly reenters her life. And it's not just him -- Alex and Reggie are back too. But to Julie's horror and agony, all three have lost their memories. (And not just them. With the exception of Bobby, nobody remembers them.)

And so, Julie has to make a decision: Fight to unseal their memories or let them live their new-found lives without her?

It's an easy choice, really. Plus, she has to make her resurrected Phantoms stay alive. Because there's a series of uncanny and nearly fatal accidents that always involve her boys and, weirdly, Nick.

(There are 1.75 chapters of this on my PC.)

Ghost license

(inspired by the movie "Hui Buh" - no focus on romance)

The boys get tasked to obtain a ghost license for the Molina house. Otherwise, they have to leave the place and become wayward ghosts (and have to return to Caleb.) And thus, the Phantoms are forced to attend a school for ghosts -- exams included.

Random character stuff:

Julie's doodling

Luke's room

AUs

Songwriting Journal of Fate

(A Kimi no Na Wa AU - Juke)

Part I

Part II

Part III

Snippet 1

Snippet 2

Show me how to be whole again

An arranged marriage/enemies-to-reluctant-allies-to-friends-to-lovers Juke AU

Plot

BAM! I'm actually writing this one.

AO3 Link

Image Board

Sweet Home Alabama AU

Yet another enemies-to-friends-to-almost-lovers-to-enemies-to-friends&lovers Juke AU.

Teaser

First & Last Scene

"Life with Derek"-inspired AU

Teaser/Prologue

Rivers of London AU

Julie, a witch in training, and Luke, a ghost

Snippet 1

Snippet 2

Snippet 3

Phantom Thieves

(A Kamikaze Kaitou Jeanne AU (without the religious stuff) - Juke)

Julie makes a deal with Caleb: She helps him collect/steal possessed artifacts, and in exchange, he'll grant her a chance to talk to her mom again.

At first, it goes pretty well. She steals the objects and hands them over to Caleb. But soon, she gets a rival. Another thief shows up, who is way too cheeky and attractive, and he starts snatching those items Julie is supposed to steal from under her nose. Julie is not amused by his attitude, and Caleb tells her that he probably wants to use these magical items for evil.

At the same time, Julie makes acquaintance with three guys who just transferred to her school, and she may or may not develop a crush on one of them. (And Julie can't help but see certain similarities between Luke and her new-found thievish rival ... but surely that's just a coincidence, right?)

Mind the Gap

(A Neverwhere AU - Willex & (minor) Juke)

Alex lives a pretty normal life. Sure, after he came out to his parents, he's become an outcast. But he's willing to put up with this shit anyway. (What are the alternatives?)

Then he encounters Willie, an extremely weird but also handsome guy who tells him that he is being hunted. Confused, Alex helps him hide. The next day, Willie is gone, and suddenly his life seems to vanish. His parents, his peers -- everyone seems to forget that he exists.

Determined to set things right, Alex sets out to find Willie, hoping that he (or the person he's running away from) has the power to give him his life back. He enters the World Below -- the place where all the people who've all fallen through the cracks stand. However, as he keeps gathering a group of unlikely and way too cheerful acquaintances who quickly become his friends (and more), he starts questioning his desire to return to the normal world.

[ay-miphae]

Hey guys I did it

i did the art challenge called astronomber where i drew the astronomer (hansi kürsch) every day for a month

here are the highlights complete with WAY too many headcanons and worldbuilding snippets. anyway I wonder if there's any similar challenges for OCs because wow drawing the same character every day for a month even if it's kind of low effort does kind of force you to develop the character

also!! I do not recommend using OneNote to draw many things at once!! why do I even use OneNote to draw when CSP is right there!!

Day 1

Feat. me trying to get better at drawing faces and Cap and Astro meeting for the first time. Kind of. An eccentric and overambitious teenager (Cap) finds the first Smart Space Person he can find, namely the guy who graduated top of his class with a degree in astrophysics (Astro). Cap gives him his entire Starblade sales pitch. Astro is overstimulated and wants to go home.

Day 2

Sorry guys it just happens to be pride month too ik I literally just posted something similar. HOW NOT TO KILL THE PLANET.PDF and the implication that it was actually 3:27 AM when I drew this make this funny to me

Days 4 and 5

Preliminary character designs really. That's it Unfortunately I have developed a toxic trait called being extremely specific with my Astro headcanons. He's 37 years old by the events of the Source (ik I de-aged him, something something the downfall of the Starbladers was too much youthful energy and not enough foresight, something something not too large of an age gap with Cap) so this involved me watching Imaginations Through The Looking Glass (2004) for reference a lot (And Then There Was Silence live oh my GOD)

Day 8

Redraw of... a self-insert AU from a year ago. Here he is in The Day That The World Breaks Down

Day 10

Thanks Maë

Day 11

OMG it's BLORBO BLEEBUS. Thanks Stormy

Day 13

Gotta run apocalypse run my way outta this place Not pictured is an objectively horrible doodle of Astro saying "I hate the French," thanks enbymetalhead (we love French people here, no French people were harmed in the making of this post)

Day 14

Hi this one comes with Headcanons. Captain (Altair) has two older siblings named Vega and Deneb because I love astronomical symbolism. Cap and his sibs are basically the nepo babies of a giant aerospace monopoly so while his sibs are off being unpleasant and conniving and figuring out how to get richer (while also screwing over the entire planet) Altair's got other plans and it gets him completely estranged from his entire fam. Anyway Vega and Astro (Estel) are the same age and were at one point academic rivals in elementary/middle school. At least only Vega saw it that way because Estel's head was in the clouds way too much to actually acknowledge a rivalrly brewing. He's just. Brilliant. Also. Unintentionally. Vega gets petty and skips ahead multiple years of school and graduates at age 15 (as do Deneb and Altair later on), never thinks about Estel again UNTIL it turns out this guy is actually brilliant and - gasp! - helping Altair with his wacko plans. Vega probably corners Estel extremely passive-aggressively at some point like "ohh so you finally got your PhD, you better rethink putting these Ideas into my little brother's head or else all of Sammet Industries will be against you :)" not like Vega cares about Altair at all really Oh and also a goofy Star of Sirrah Astro

Day 16 18

FLUFF AND ANGST AND FLUFF AND- "All I ever want is to be at your side" is because I was listening to Skalds and Shadows on loop and also I love @ Zarak's headcanon that Cap has freckles like stars in constellations

Day 17

Some sillies reading ASTROPHYSICS FOR NERDS ALPHAN EDITION and attending ALPHAN UNIVERSITY because the running gag of appending Alphan in front of everything gives me life honestly

Day 18 (again)

Oh my god this one is me projecting about getting into the physics program at my university help. Also Astro at various ages because the tired professor look is so real and I think Hansi had curly hair at one point why do I even know these things

Day 19

Bro in university. Bro zoning out and becoming one with the stars. I don't even know what's going on with the captions here

Day 20

this might exceed 30 images tbh I might need a new post Okay probably my most comprehensive outfit ref for Astro which probably says something about my lack of actual refs but. Kind of rotates through the same few sweater/button up combos with something of a light academia aesthetic. Everybody gets their own Starblade-issued uniforms (plot-wise this would probably be from Run Apocalypse Run onward) with the obligatory Source green overlay, very much a more modular sci-fi design. And also him as Forever 🕈 (I have that symbol to copy and paste on speed dial) Evolution into a Forever takes place over a long period of time, but certain effects, like immortality, happen immediately.

Day 24

More canon lyric stuff. Aquatic Race and Into The Ocean. Not even sure what I'm including and not including in this post but at one point I sketched Astro as the guy from the Beyond The Red Mirror cover because I'm very normal about BTRM. Speaking of things I'm normal part I'm also very normal about the part in The Last Candle Live where Hansi goes "guardian guardian guardian of the blind guardian guardian guardian of the blind GUARDIAN GUARDIAN GUARDIAN OF THE BLIND RAAAAAAAHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHA" and laughs maniacally and whips aside the microphone stand extremely dramatically, so much so that I used it as a reference like three times and it looks kind of cool I guess

Day 25

HAHAH OKAY! Human Compulsion time plus. Headcanons.

Five years before the Source: Altair Sammet, arrested on multiple charges of fraud and treason. It's maybe the second or third time this has happened, surely he's got enough wealth to be bailed out another time and this is just another minor setback. Estel Kürsch knows otherwise. He's been keeping up with what the other Sammets really think, almost obsessively. They aren't coming for him this time. Altair is important though. Not just for Alpha's survival but... to him as well. Estel doesn't know what to do but, anxiety ridden and later deeply in dept, somehow pulls the right strings for Altair to avoid serious legal trouble. It's here that Estel realizes the lengths he would go to for this man, for the entire planet and human race and swears to love him forever. Altair realizes he can't do it all on his own. He breaks down a bit.

Millions, billions of years later. Altair is no longer his name. Forever [Eagle], if he even remembers that. A hollow shell of the radiant individual he once was. He is filled with so much disappointment and burnout and so much anger that's all given way to ... nothingness.

He won't stand the company of anybody, except a select few. Forever 🕈 is one of them. He seeks him out in the depths from time to time. A husk. But still alive.

Forevers have webbed fingers, and it's difficult to hold hands.

The burden of responsibility is on 🕈 again. He hates to have to be the spokesperson for a dying world again. But he was there, on Alpha, if only a distant memory. And on the behalf of Altair and his other friends of old who completely lost themselves, he must speak up.

"In a world of tomorrow dreams, our future lies"

(my handwriting is pretty illegible but that's the gist of it)

My draft deleted right here so everything from here on is a rewrite but fortunately it saved most of it ahah

Day 26

The science pals (Chemist and Biologist)! Look how whimsical they are when the world is on the brink of imminent disaster 🥰

Day 27

Because Stormy drew Cap wearing Astro's sweater and it's knee-length on him so we were wondering what if Astro stole Cap's clothes Also I gave Astro a sister! And then I take her away for character development reasons! Vanna (the Ever-Young, something something Tolkien + it was the first name I thought of), she dies for reasons that could have otherwise been avoided had Alpha not been so environmentally screwed or something, haven't thought of the details, something about Astro channeling his grief/trauma from that into intense escapism + idealism

Day 29

Was listening to 01011001 so here's this funky River of Time Theory as to why Astro adopts the Celtic cross as his Forever symbol: you know how Tobias Sammet wears a cross pendant a lot? Like it's on his character photo on the Source artbook and everything? I typically draw Captain wearing a compass instead because it fits better ig, but maybe Cap does have a similar pendant. I'm not sure what it would symbolize, Alphan cultures and symbols being different yet similar to Earth's and all. Anyway. Cap loses it several thousand (maybe millions?) years after their arrival on Y, this is around when he starts becoming an emotionless husk. Astro finds it, it invokes something in him, he swears to be the one to speak up on behalf of his friends' lost vitality. A motivation or reminder, maybe.

Day 30

Uhhh here's what he thinks about several others on the Starblade, again with my crappy handwriting so here we go: Captain: his husband, loves him for many different reasons Biologist: trusted colleague, he wishes he was more like her Prophet: does NOT understand how stars work. he SWEARS TO THE MIGRATOR if he hears someone talking about astrology AGAIN- Chemist: brilliant but he still keeps his walls up Historian: trusted mentor with seemingly infinite knowledge TH-1: forgot what I was planning to do with him in my headcanon LMAO so excuse to draw a tiny low-effort TH-1

...

Uhhhyeah that's what I've been up to last month, Arjen should give me a gold medal for this or something idk thanks for listening to my brainrot

i am making a new art challenge called astronomber where i draw the astronomer (hansi kürsch) every day for a month good morning and good night

[citrusici]

director's commentary for stygian ringlet??? 👀👀👀

OH BOY WHERE TO EVEN START

jesus christ this fic is easily the longest fic I've written to date. If you count Ghost of Mementos, it's OVER 70K WORDS TOTAL. AND IT'S STILL GOING. I've never written anything so long before. THIS THING STARTED AS A ONESHOT AND IT JUST E X P L O D E D

Actually this whole fic started after I was looking around on AO3 for PT Minato fics, and while I was bored during class I doodled what I thought Yu and Minato's masks would look like. I wanted their outfits to have some meaning to them beyond the surface-level aesthetics. Yu's outfit didn't get very far, but Minato… holy shit, once I based it off of Ryoji's outfit, it was off to the races. I immediately thought about how that awakening scene would go. and then I made a rough snippet of said scene. and then thought about how they would get up to that point and then before I knew it whoops I had a half completed fic

and then I finished and posted said fic

and then I noticed I still had some ideas left over for what happens later on

and I thought

"why NOT keep going, im having fun and the worst that can happen is I fall out of it, unfinished fics are better than no fic"

and that is how I found myself writing a longfic.

ANYWAY

my whole line of thinking for PT Minato was that I kept thinking about how Minato would bond with the PTs and how he would end up being a full fledged PT himself, because honestly that would make a prime opportunity for some really interesting character development. Minato had originally accepted the price of sealing Nyx at the end of P3, but after somehow accidentally falling back into reality and hanging out with the PTs for a while, he'd probably start to wonder if its ok to want things to be better than they turned out. his rebellion is the fact that he wants to live even though he's not supposed to. He's rebelling against his original fate, and his persona is the very person who fought against his true nature as DEATH INCARNATE just to be his friend. MAN. He'd fit right in with the PTs. (I still have feelings over these two dont mind me)

I was a little worried the whole amnesia trope would be a little dumb or dragged out too long, but it turned out to be fine. I mostly used it for plot regulation, bc I wanted him to have time to learn more about them at the same time as they're learning about him. He probably wouldn't have had a good reason to stick around long enough to bond with them otherwise. Kind of like Sophia, now that I think about it.

I've also learned a lot doing this?? outlining is a GODSEND why the hell wasn't I making bullet point lists before this

uhhhh I cant think of anything else off the top of my head, except that maybe chapters 10 and 12 were my favorites to write so far, though its real hard to pick a favorite

also if you want to see the notebook lecture doodles that spawned this entire brainrot circus here they are, some masks and a chat icon

(kinda wanna make a royal-style character art with him holding his mask but that's self-indulgent art for another day)

[laney-swan]

Hello reader and welcome,

I recently decided to start up a blog about my day to day life, much like a diary. I want to improve my writing skills and I know the best way to do that is practice. I’m by no means a great writer, but I think I am a good storyteller. I have been writing and telling stories since I was little and my dad was the one to always encourage me to be a writer, while my mom encouraged me to go into the arts. Well surprisingly I did both in college. I went to Keene State College in New Hampshire right out of high school to study Performing arts and costuming. Then a few years later I went to Southern New Hampshire University online and received my second BA in Creative Writing for Screen Writing. Before I get into a life story, which will probably bore you and you will never read anything I write again, I wanted to talk about the five things you will see on this blog.

1. Theme Parks

I live in Orlando Florida and work at Universal Studios Orlando Resort as a costumer, and I am a Walt Disney World annual pass holder. I have been going to theme parks since I was a few months old, my first trip to Disney I was around 6 months old I think. So I love coasters, all the new rides, trying different theme park foods, and going to the parks with my friends. You will see a lot of Disney World and Universal stuff on here, but my fiancé and I want to start going to other parks in Florida as well.

2. DIY, Crafts, and Costumes

Now although I work with costumes daily, I don’t make or design them…yet. However I like doing that stuff in my own home. So when I’m not out at a theme park you can find me doodling, painting, or planning my next creative project. Right now I am working on my biggest project yet…my wedding. So I hope to post how -to’s, fun’s DIY’s and of course costuming stuff.

3. Writing and Reading

Like I said before, this blog is really so I can practice writing, so I hope I can put short stories on here, or even publish chapters of a story. This way everyone can critic my work and help me make my stories more grammatically correct. I also want to put some of the books I am reading on here, or re-blog books I think I would like/know I love. AKA all the Harry Potter books 😂

4. All Things Film

I love movies, I mean I did get a degree for screen writing, so I hope I like movies. I want to be able to put movie reviews on here and reboot movie posts. Maybe I’ll put some snippets of screen writing on here, but honestly I like to keep those to myself. However, I wouldn’t mind putting short film scripts up, I’m sure this could also help film students who don’t particularly like writing but love directing. We will see though, I just worry about people stealing my work and taking the credit.

5. Life Style

I’m no beauty guru, and not great with fashion trends, but I know what I like. So I would talk about the life style that I am inspired by and try to live by. There willl be lots of vintage, cozy, cottage, academia vibes here. However there will also be a lot of Disney and nerdy stuff too. As well as wedding planning, house hunting, and eventually planning for a family. I want to talk about things that really matter to me and maybe to many of you.

Hopefully I haven’t completely bored you into never reading anything I post again, and if you have made it this far into the post thank you for reading. I look forward to lots of writing and hopefully sticking with this blog, because I really need to get my writing voice down. I hope to hear from you all in the future.

Have an amazing day,

Laney Swan

[truly-morgan]

Fanfic idea am too tired to write for now pt.2

So this one came back to me later and would probably need a longer post to talk about it, even though am not sure if i’ll ever manage to write it one day

TodoBakuDeku (kind of? am not sure yet) or TodoDeku

Villain!Deku + turned villain!Todoroki

So the general idea of Villain Deku is obviously not mine, dunno who came up first with it (but whoever did is a fucking genius), but this version of it is fully mine, damn I can actually be original sometime.

I love Villain Deku and in mine he doesn’t join UA at all, as he join the league of villain first. This story would have more heavy theme in the first chapter I guess because I wanted to play on a accumulation of Midoriya’s bullying and All Might absolute denial (despite it being for his own good).

He’s taken in and basically saved by the league of villain after they see him jump, his notebook catching their attention. I personally prefer the idea that Midoriya joins them only on the condition that he won’t ever act on innocent civilian, only criminal and the Hero Organisation. He’d contribute by analysing every hero’s in combat and probably get himself so underground combat prop to be able to fight and survive out there.

I was also going for Todoroki ending up joining him, probably with a meeting similar to what happen at the sport festival, where Midoriya tries to show him his flame are his. He kind of give him a choice, heavily implying that he could get at his dad by using his flame for the exact contrary of what he would want: villainous act. 

So yeah, we have both Deku and Todoroki being villains, how would Bakugo react? Probably not well since he did help in bringing Deku where he is now, though I do wanna play on making his character grow.

I honestly have to plan so much about this AU, especially since am still only 1/3 into the manga because I stop reading after getting too tired at the end of December. It always isn’t as ship oriented as someof my other ones, but that wasn’t exactly the first point of it anyway, since the idea was just Villain”Deku at first.

Maybe I’ll write some snippet or draw some doodles from this AU if I have time.

[happikattwuzheere]

the one where gansey befriends a deer: the au

hey remember that time ronan dreamed up a deer that was described with language suspiciously similar to how adam’s described, because i sure do!!! anyway

OK.

ok. so. this au’s actually evolved a lot since its initial already-pretty-fleshed-out inception one sleepless night, so me talking about it’s gonna be more than one post, but here’s the first one well actually the second technically yesterday’s warmup doodles were also from this au but i didnt talk about it at all so

and I’m gonna start with more or less the same pitch I gave to a couple people on discord

SO. starting out: it’s standard fantasy times, vaguely medieval but no specific time period because I don’t care enough to be digging into that quite frankly, but it is somewhere in England where this is happening. Story starts with just Gansey, Ronan, and Noah. Fey are very real and known entities and there’s been a conflict in England between the fey and humans, if not in the whole country then at least in the lands that the Ganseys are the lords of but probably the whole island tbh, and Gansey’s not inherited the lands yet but he’s going to and wants to maybe find a peaceful resolution to the conflict. It’s not open warfare by any means but it’s been a big problem. 

To the effect of solving that, he heads to some little village that I haven’t named but it’s right next to a known fey forest called Cabeswater. This village has avoided being stomped by the local fey because, despite witches not being particularly liked by the nobility of the time, there’s a big old coven (the psychics of Fox Way, essentially) situated right by this village that’s kept things in check. Gansey’s made his excuses to his parents about why he’s officially going there but really he wants to talk to the witches and get a better grasp of the conflict from the people actually dealing with it.  He and Ronan set out from home together, pick up Noah along the way--who is not a ghost in this AU, he’s a fey who owes Gansey a life debt, that’s a whole other post and THIS post is mostly about gansey and adam--but anyway they get to this village and NOBODY gives gansey the time of day. 

the witches don’t let him into their house because they don’t like the nobility right back thanks and the next time he tries to visit Cabeswater won’t even let him get to the coven’s dwelling, the one witch’s daughter who regularly stops by the village for supplies and to check if anyone needs anything has a big argument with him the first time he talks to her so that’s going nowhere, and, well, the villagers are polite, but they clearly don’t take him seriously. He’s just the lordling playing at things and potentially meddling in their business to them.

So he starts hanging out just barely within Cabeswater, even though he knows that’s not wise, because he finds this perfect spot by a stream, and he’ll sit out there and think and work on the journal he keeps of all his thoughts and plans, and one day while he’s there has a straight up Disney princess experience when a deer stops by the stream and seems incredibly unafraid of him. he cherishes the experience but accepts that it probably won’t happen again.

and then it does. several times. gansey’s losing his mind. this deer??? apparently likes listening to him info dump?? it’s very therapeutic and also very magical and he’s amazed 

a few times in, he names the deer “Pryderi” after a character from a welsh legend, because “such a handsome creature deserves a princely name,” [[muffled blue laughing and whispering “princely” in the distance]], and he tells ronan and noah about this experience but ronan doesn’t believe him at ALL. 

one time after gansey’s particularly upset at how bad his attempts at getting along with the villagers, Pryderi actually lets Gansey touch him for the first time and gansey cannot shut up about it to ronan who’s finally like “i think you’re bullshitting me about this deer thing. im coming with you next time” and gansey’s like “well he’s a deer he might not show up if a stranger’s around and he doesn’t come every time i go down there anyway” and ronan’s like “this sounds like a lot of excuses, dick, you’re not making me believe you any more with this” and gansey’s like “>8\” 

but pryderi does show up, and gansey is delighted, and ronan stares really hard at him and then goes 

and gansey’s like what? nooo. but ronan keeps arguing it for the duration of the visit and the deer actually starts to look annoyed and at the end ganseys like ok maybe but i doubt it. and then hes like “well since you are a fey apparently (/sarcasm) i ought to say farewell with respect” and bows very mockingly and then the deer makes direct eye contact with ronan and bows back and gansey loses his shit

gansey continues meeting up with pryderi but even while his infodumping still happens it does so now with the knowledge that He Does Actually Understand What Im Saying, he may be a fey but he seems like a friendly one and hey that’s way more than gansey thought he would get out here, and also this deer is his friend now thanks, 

he, ronan, and noah (who’s amused by Pryderi but keeps his main thoughts to himself for now) make some excursions into cabeswater, but the thing is noah’s not really native to england, he’s from the european mainland, again i’ll get to it in another post sometime, but. he can sort of help navigate cabeswater but not all THAT well so they get lost a couple times, and every time it does happen pryderi shows up and helps guide them out. there’s some very funny moments of a very jealous ronan getting into weird conflict w/ a very smug deer 

anyWAY one day there’s like a festival, everyone’s drunk because its the middle ages and there’s not really a drinking age, gansey’s making another effort to make friends with anyone, and this one guy about his own age is like “ok look here i’ll teach you the folk dance everyone’s doing ok?” and gansey spends the night dancing w/ a handsome stranger, yes he will recognize the irony in the morning, but for now it goes. well badly because they’re both drunk but it’s fun, and then the guy says “ah, fuck it, i’ll finish teaching you next time we see each other” and gansey’s like “thats a little forward but ok!” and the guy (adam. its adam) panics and leaves while gansey’s back is turned and gansey doesn’t remember that last snippet of conversation the next day nor can he quite recall the stranger’s face. ronan does, because he was watching and not sure which of the two he was jealous of, but neither of them has any idea who the guy actually was. 

and then like, 3 days later, gansey falls asleep at the spot he usually hangs out in in cabeswater and wakes up in the early evening just in time to hear people yelling and for Pryderi to burst into view with an arrow in his flank. he collapses in a bush. gansey snaps into “protect friend” mode and gets the hunters off his trail by being all “oh a strange buck? i saw it pass that way over there friend!” and then when they’re gone he comes back and is all “alright pryderi they’re gone, let me just--” except pryderi’s not a deer anymore. it’s a boy. 

(Adam. its adam. the deer is adam.) 

gansey takes him home, gets the arrow out, noah’s like “i mean he’s not a fey, i dont know what turning into a deer is about but if he were fey the iron in that arrow would already have him dead. he might be partially fey but so little that he’s human in the ways that really matter”, over the next couple days they figure out that pryderi is in fact from the village and is a young man named adam parrish who’s been labelled a changeling and is assumed dead since he was yknow shot, gansey decides for now its probably best to keep him that way, but adam’s not getting better--apparently even having had the arrow in him as briefly as he did has poisoned him, he’s desperately ill and on the third day is finally like “get persephone” so gansey tries again (he’s tried several times over these days, they’d worked out that to have survived this long he must have someone else with a small degree of fey blood teaching him the ropes and the most likely suspects are the witches, but he’s hoping adam specifically asking him to will grant him permission enough to go in) and runs into a very frantic blue en route who as soon as he makes it clear he’s got adam is like “move your ass over on that horse im climbing on too” 

they get persephone, who turns into a fox rather than a deer, she saves adam, everythings cool except adam’s pissy now because he cant go back to the village and he has to give up on the attempts he had in the works to get out of town by working his way out and he takes it out on gansey who doesnt deserve it because this friendship is a mess, he’ll feel bad and take it back eventually but thats yet more posts ANYWAY YEAH theres our starting point 

(also worth noting: due to cabeswater being Right There,  p much everyone in this village actually has a small degree of fey blood, adam just won the genetic lottery) 

tl;dr adam’s a fey-blooded witch’s apprentice and he’s been the deer the whole time and thats the start of this au ty for coming to this ramble 

[emgkheadcannons]

I want to do the Kelly is a comic book writer Au but I don’t want to write the whole story, just snippets. So here is the outline. I will probably add snippets and stuff, just wanted the stories set up done and over with, and I can get to the fun stuff. Set in 2015.

&&&&&&

Em starts reading this new indie comic on the recommendation of a friend. He ends up loving it. It’s a suspenseful mystery, with a head trip and superpowers thrown in.

The problem is that it doesn’t have a regular release date and the writer is a mystery. They have a WEBTOON account, and some social media for the comic but no way of contacting them. They go by the monikers MGK, and Kelly.

******

Colson works as a barista, and bartender. He also writes and illustrates his own comic series that is pretty popular. He would love to write full time but he has bills to pay and art materials can be expensive. He is careful not to let too much of his personal information get out yet. He will once he’s in a better place, and can focus on his art more.

He likes being a barista, and bartender. The cafe he works at is owned by a witch, and doubles as a bar after dark, plus the atmosphere is cool, relaxed, and accepting. The patrons are for the most part nice, and he makes decent money. Enough that he can make a decent living. The downside is that the cafe is open 24 hours, and some of the shifts suck, but it’s not bad.

******

Em finds out that MGK is doing a live stream, where they are going to be drawing random things, answering some questions, and hopefully gives them an update on the next chapter. He has Hailey help him set up an account for the live stream, and is careful not to let others know he is Eminem.

******

The stream goes well for Colson. He gets a lot of questions, and types a response for most of them. Some were just too personal. There was one person who stuck out. They asked a few good questions, and gave his art a lot of compliments.

Em continues to watch MGK’s streams, and eventually Kelly herself (hahaha) messages him. Em and Colson start a friendship over the web. Neither saying who they really are (or gender in Colson’s case).

Em inspires Colson, and he gets farther in the comic. Em has someone to talk to, that doesn’t treat him like Eminem, and he gets to geek out over comics. They develop a relationship besides the comic and become friends. After months of talking they decided to meet in person. Both are apprehensive, Kelly because he is going to meet this awesome person and doesn’t want to disappoint him, and Em because he doesn’t know how Kelly will react to him being Eminem.

******

Em is in Cleveland on business and they decide to meet at a small cafe.

It doesn’t go well. Em thinks he is looking for a woman going by the name Kelly, and Colson is not expecting Eminem.

Colson tries to introduce himself but is ignored and then shoved away. Having enough, he leaves, upset and lonely. He finally gets to meet the person he’s been talking to and not only does it turn out to be one of Colson’s heroes but his hero turns out to be a jerk and just dismisses him. He already has low self esteem and this didn’t help.

Colson leaves behind a doodle of one of his new characters for his comic. Em sees the doodle and thinks nothing of it, until the new issue is released a week later, that the doodle that that punk dropped is in the comic.

Em thought, he was stood-up and was pissed. He doesn’t message MGK and tries to move on with his life. When the comic is updated Em reads it and he puts two and two together. That Kelly was the tall, lanky blond who kept on trying to get his attention, and Em just shoved him away. He thought the guy was just some pushy fan. He feels terrible and tries to contact MGK but is blocked.

Colson is uninspired now. He doesn’t feel like drawing or writing anything. He posted the latest episode because he finished it before he was supposed to meet Em. He wanted to give him a sneak peak before he posted it. Now he doesn’t care. His comic was an escape from the real world, but it has brought the real world crashing down.

Em finally tracks down the cafe Colson works at, and goes there to apologize, but Colson just ignores him. The harder he tries, the more annoyed Colson gets, until Colson’s manager tells him to go on break. Em follows him, and explains why he was rude.

******

“Listen, I’m sorry. I thought you were just some obnoxious stan, who wouldn’t go away. I didn’t realise that you were Kelly.”-Em

“Sorry to be a disappointment to the great Slim Shady, but this is who I am. I would say ‘take it or leave it’, but you already made that decision.Sorry I don’t live up to what you thought I was. Sorry I’m not good enough for you.”-Colson spits as his eyes start to glisten.

“Fuck! I know I messed up, okay. I’m not disappointed that you're you, or that you're a guy, or anything like that. I just thought you were a chick, and I was excited to meet you, that I didn’t realise that you were Kelly.”-Em

“ Why did you think I was a girl?”-Colson asked angrily

“ You go by MGK, and Kelly. Only Kellys I know are women.”-Em answered lamely

“MGK stands for Machine Gun Kelly, like the old school gangster.”-Colson huffed

“Oh.”-E

“Yeah, ‘oh’. Now If you are done I’m going back to work.”-Colson turns and starts to head back inside. Em grabs his wrist before he gets too far. The blond turns around facing the older man.

“Please wait. I know what I did was shitty, and that you have every right to be mad, but please listen. You are perfect just the way you are. Just because you don’t match what was in my head doesn’t mean you aren’t good enough or that I am disappointed. Okay. You are an amazing artist. I’m sorry I ever made you feel that way about yourself.”-Em

Em lets go of his wrist and it falls to Colson’s side. Neither one of them move for a moment. Colson looks Em in the eyes, tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Do you mean that?”-Colson asks

“Yeah. I do.”-Em

“My shift ends at 2. Wanna try again?”-Colson

“Yeah. I would.”-Em

******

[frostyalice]

fic: can i make it any more obvious? (4k)

Summary: BITE ME, JASPER!

The sign is hard to ignore and not so easy to read when it’s being waved wildly by some girl, Maria notices. When she looks harder, she swears she recognizes her.

“She always was weird,” Jessica chirps into her ear.

(or: a sk8er boi au that no one but me wanted or asked for)

a/n 1: well. i did it. i figure, if we’re throwing it back fandom-wise, we may as well throw it back to avril lavigne as well. although, tbh, i was more of a ‘girlfriend’ girl myself and not really a fan (or even very aware) of of sk8er boi until recently lol

Anyway! (to try to keep from wasting your reading time, i am letting you know now that the part of the fic that’s posted below is only a snippet of the full fic - a teaser, if you will. i didn’t realize how long this fic would get until i finished it. so in order to keep from having to scroll through all 4k words of the fic when someone visits my blog on mobile, i opted out of posting the full fic on tumblr. there will be a link to the complete ao3 version at the end of the snippet, or you can skip that and just click here now)

____

Past…

She watches as he hesitates by his locker, trying to time his walk over to her, she assumes. He’s brave, she has to admit, if he plans on going over with all her snooty friends still around. She slowly puts another book inside her own locker, watching.

He closes his locker, takes a deep breath and then walks over to the small – even for her age – girl, surrounded by her group of friends. They don’t seem to notice him. After a minute or so he finally clears his throat.

“Maria,” he says quietly, making them aware of his presence. One of her friends taps her on the shoulder, pointing.

The girl, Maria, turns and Alice watches as she looks him up and down.

“What?” she finally asks.

“Um, I was just wondering,” he starts off slowly. One of Maria’s friends snickers. “If you’d like to go out. With me. Sometime.”

She watches as both of Maria’s best friend, turn eagerly to each other, hiding laughs behind their hands. Maria takes a while to answer, and when she does, her heart sinks.

“Look, Jason-”

“Jasper,” he corrects quietly.

“Yeah, whatever. Jackson,” she flicks her long hair over her shoulder. “I don’t remember ever having a conversation with you, but if I ever did something to make you think I liked you, I’m sorry. But, yeah, no. Sorry.”

From her spot across the hall, Alice can see Jasper push his tongue against the inside of his cheek. A habit he does when he’s flustered, she’s figured out.

“Right,” he says. Then, unceremoniously he turns and walks away.

“See you later!” she calls.

He doesn’t look back and immediately, all of Maria’s friends start gossiping amongst themselves.

“What a freak,” one says.

“Do you even know him?”

“He’s so tall.”

Alice watches Jasper start walking faster away from them. She spares one last look at the group and is startled to see that Maria is still watching Jasper’s retreating form. Quickly, she shuts her locker and fast-walks so she can catch up to the taller boy.

“That’s too bad,” she says in what she hopes is a sympathetic tone.

He seems surprised to see her beside him, but he nods, nonetheless. The only sign he even knows that she witnessed him getting rejected is the slight flush to his neck. “Thanks, Alice.”

He continues on his way down the wall, and Alice stumbles to a stop. One, because she has to turn here for her next class. But mostly, because, well, she didn’t even know he knew her name.

With a smile on her face, she skips on down to her next class. She gathers a few odd glances, but pays them no mind.

She’s always been weird. Always will be, too.

Being normal is so overrated anyway.

.

Alice watches as he walks into the cafeteria, with nothing on his tray but a banana. As usual.

That’s good, she thinks. Potassium.

She looks at her own cafeteria mush and think she may have made the right choice. She pushes it around, but is startled when a bag falls down on the bench a little farther from her. She looks up to find Jasper sitting diagonal from her. He looks up the table in her direction.

“Mind if I sit here?”

Alice eyes him and the quite large space between them. “All yours,” she says.

For the rest of lunch period, she tries to focus on making her lunch mush taste as appealing as possible, but is having no such luck. Plus, she keeps getting distracted by Jasper, because, well, he’s Jasper.

Currently, he seems to be doodling some sort of logo.

100 monkeys it seems to be trying to say.

“That looks cool,” she comments, probably looking more than a little snoopy, craning her neck up to see it in all its glory.

“Thanks, but I can’t really get all the components to fit so it all goes together, you know? As one piece.”

“Gotchya,” she says. She bites her lip. “Can I see it? Just real quick,” she says quickly.

He looks a little wary, but slides the sketchpad down to her anyway. Quickly, she opens the book so she can use a blank page while still being able to see how he was trying to go about it before. She quickly copies what he has drawn already, tweaking some things here and there, and adding in something that resembles a monkey’s tail hanging from the top part. She slides it back to him, feeling shy all of a sudden.

“Alice,” he says, and her heart flutters a little. “This is really good. Can I show the rest of the guys this?”

“Of course,” she chirps. “What’s it for, by the way?”

“Oh, I’m in a band. Sort of,” he tacks on.

She already knew this. She remembers a few months ago he and some of his friends had handed out flyers in front of the school. She hadn’t been able to go because she had had to babysit her sister.

“That’s cool,” she says.

read full fic on ao3 --->

____

a/n 2: for Vibes, you can refer to these wonderfully old pictures

and here is one of ashley and jackson bc whenever i write alice and jasper i can only imagine jackson and ashley. bc movies always ruin my original portrayal of characters (as in i can only see the actors now, and can’t even remember how i originally pictured the book characters, not that i think they’re bad) but it works, bc jackson was in a band. so. whoo.

and to think i thought i wouldn’t be writing any more jalice for a while after my whumptober fiasco.. and then wrote this in probably a collective few hours.. whoops

[oathkeeper-of-tarth]

From Down This Low

The fateful first meeting of Bismuth and Rose Quartz, or: Bismuth can’t help but care far too much. From Working Title: eeEEeeeeEE BISMUTH, same source as Quite Contrary and other snippets.

(Back when I wrote the first draft of this, ages ago, it was pretty straightforward. Now it’s suddenly got a dozen implications per anything Rose says, a ton of bittersweetness, and altogether is just sad where I never originally intended it to be, but here we are and that’s just how it is in this post-ASPR world.)

~2400 words. Briefly featuring a ruby (who isn’t our Ruby) and a pearl (who isn’t our Pearl), and a warning for Homeworld is Horrible brand content and minor character death.

---

From Down This Low

For centuries to come, Bismuth would remember with perfect clarity the well-respected Benitoite architect coming to inspect a relatively fresh arena building site on the promising new colony, her ruby guard escort and pearl by her side. It was hard to forget, too, all the warnings and instructions the overseers had made sure every single bismuth on-site was well aware of, had drummed into them under pain of a variety of terrible fates.

Then, almost as soon as the inspection started, the slip-up and the bit of earth that was supposed to have been flattened long ago, the shouts of one of the ruby guards and the bismuth next to her desperately trying, and failing, to regain control of a long girder.

And it would be downright impossible for her to forget the growing horror of the pearl staggering and slipping backwards into the mouth of one of the recently dug foundation pits, trying desperately to keep herself together, her form glitching and increasingly out of her control, hands clutching at the cracked gem on her throat like it could possibly help stop the webbing, flaking damage.

For a moment Bismuth felt something like hope - the Benitoite actually looked upset, even concerned. But that got snuffed out quickly enough, as soon as she spoke, in that drawl that made Bismuth shiver and feel like the refraction of her entire form was slightly off.

“Oh dear, no... I'll never get a replacement in time for the hosting next cycle…”  

The callous disregard was, perhaps, the worst part of it all. It was just a pearl, yes, but Bismuth wanted to scream, it’s your pearl. Surely you owe her something, some small speck of feeling? She has to be more than an inconvenience to you, in the end.

Benitoite then proceeded to make a big fuss about destruction of property and compensation. The bismuth ended up harvested and the inattentive ruby guard shattered on the spot with the most sickening of sounds. The pearl…

Well, the pearl was left at the bottom of the pit, right where she'd fallen, twitching and glitching out and grasping at her throat as the crack in her gem deepened, and as it became clear that nobody cared about her save as an argument anymore.

Once the visitors finally left, and work was done for that rotation, Bismuth sneaked back on site and made her way down into the pit, and quietly held the pearl’s more and more immaterial hand. She did her best to try avoid looking too long at the tiny leftover ruby-red shards scattered about them, but they glistened, and they played in front of her when she closed her eyes, and they deserved better.

She stayed with the pearl as long as she could, took her with herself when the pearl couldn't hold on anymore and retreated into her crumbling gem, then hid her away in a nook in a half-built wall, next to a tidy pile of red shards - as many as she’d managed to find. The pearl never came back out.

(Rose could have helped her, was a thought that would resonate, centuries later. But Rose had burst onto this particular stage just a little too late, and her healing tears even later.

It built and built and built into the realisation that she couldn't sit around and wait for Rose to save everyone.)

-

Bismuth had no patience for meddling guards, not after the day she’d had. So when a rose quartz with the curliest cloud of bright pink hair Bismuth had ever seen trotted over to the edge of the construction site and very conspicuously tried to catch her eye, she kept her back turned.

“There are no delays. The arena will be ready for you all exactly as ordered,” she grumbled, barely managing to bite back just in time for you to wreck it and reduce good, hard, costly work to piles of rubble. Typical. “Did you need something else?”

“I just wanted… to ask you a few things.”

Bismuth turned, despite herself. The rose quartz looked sheepish and awkward, toying with the pink diamond emblazoned on the front of her uniform, with an air of having just sprung out of the ground about her. Everything about the situation seemed to slot into a familiar place, and Bismuth sighed.

“Okay, listen, I know I’ve helped some of you out in the past, but I can’t go around secretly fixing every barracks wall before your regiment gets in trouble with the agate, not with the schedule they have us on here.” Bismuth rolled her eyes, “Pink Diamond needs her giant statues, yesterday! And besides, I remember telling your pals to keep it on the down low when I last gave you a hand. Who told you to come get me?”

The quartz hastily waved her concerns away. “Oh, no, you misunderstood. I really do just want to talk. Nobody sent me here.”

“Talk.”

“Yes! Talk. Maybe…” the quartz shot a vaguely nervous look around them, pointedly catching on the few stragglers still on-site, “in private.”

Bismuth narrowed her eyes. “You’re a strange one. But fine. I know a place we can go.”

It took her a few more minutes to finish up the chiseling on her current block, then she shapeshifted her hands back, dusted them off, and motioned for the quartz to follow.

She took them to a small stretch of beach at a nearby lake that was due to be drained soon - probably as soon as the terraforming unit could spare a lapis for an hour or two. But for now, it was a pleasantly quiet place to sit and think - or brood, which she’d been doing quite a bit of lately.

Bismuth sat down on a beached log, and the quartz followed suit. She was almost comically entranced with the play of sunlight on the lake’s surface, it seemed a shame to interrupt. But Bismuth doubted either of them could afford to hang around indefinitely.

“So,” she prompted, toying with a bit of driftwood she found at her feet. “Can’t say I’ve really talked to a rose quartz before. Don’t you lot usually get nicer assignments? We just get amethysts who’ve gotten on their commander’s bad side keeping us in line here, officially.”

The quartz ignored her words completely, choosing instead to lean over. “What’s that you’re drawing?”

“Hm? Oh,” Bismuth noticed she’d started doodling in the dirt. “A habit. Nothing much. Sometimes when I come here I just like to… get some ideas out, visualise. That sort of thing. Does no harm, and gets washed away eventually.”

The quartz was staring at her so wide-eyed and so fascinated, Bismuth couldn’t suppress a chuckle. “Okay, look, you saw the scaffolding back there, right? For the pillars?” A nod. “Well, I was just thinking, and honestly when I draw it out it really seems to hold up - instead of the stuff Benitoite has us doing with them, we should do something like this.”

She’d already sketched out the supports, and added some detail to indicate where she’d have the load distributed and the arches go, just to make it clearer for the uninitiated - or, well, her entire audience.

The look the rose quartz gave her turned oddly pointed. “So you don’t think the pillars should be handled the way they are? Surely… surely Her Diamond’s Architect Benitoite is right?”

Bismuth huffed. “No, of course not. They’ll be gone in a couple thousand rotations, worn down to tiny floating bits. Besides, they’re ugly. Now this,” she pointed out the swirling lines in her hasty mud sketch, “this would be much better, much more durable, and it would look spectacular. And even Pink Diamond might be pleased with something, finally, instead of having us do everything over and over again. Benitoite is as clueless as a chunk of shale.” Then she thought back to the architect’s haughty drawl, and her pearl, and the nook in the wall, and she found her mood rapidly darkening. “But hey, like anyone cares what I think. Might as well be the dirt under their feet. And that’s exactly where I’ll end up anyway.”

The quartz looked sadly at where Bismuth had thrown down her stick and smudged away most of the drawing in one frustrated swipe of her foot.

“You don’t seem to have much love for your superiors, or... Pink Diamond,” she began, slightly hesitantly.

“Love?” Bismuth snorted. “Love your Diamond is something meant for other Gems. All I’m supposed to do is get my work done as quickly as possible and get out of the way even quicker, so it can be properly enjoyed by those it’s actually meant for.” She turned to the quartz. “Listen, er-”

“Rose,” she happily supplied. No facet or cut or any sort of designation. Bismuth raised an eyebrow, but decided to shrug and roll with it.

“Right. Rose. You look like a fresh face, so here’s a friendly hint: the arenas are for you to wreck, but best keep out of the fancy places, yeah? They don’t want you there any more then they want me. If some upper crust tries to make you believe that she does, stay away from her. It’s not worth getting entangled in any of that, and it can get real dangerous for you real fast.”

Rose frowned, but nodded. Bismuth wasn’t sure she was coming across properly, but she’d done her best with the warning. She seemed to have gotten her to think, at least - Rose certainly looked like she was mulling over something serious.

“I actually… I wanted to ask you something,” she spoke up after a stretch of slightly strained silence.

“Yeah? Your big secret that we needed to talk in private for?” Bismuth had no idea what it could possibly be, but she also couldn’t see any harm in it. And hey, if she could help a newbie quartz with something that was bothering her, why would she not?

Rose didn’t respond immediately, but spent a while looking out at the lake again. A breeze started up, and made her rich, pink curls dance around her shoulders - she was certainly a sight to behold, as impressive as quartzes generally went. Then she turned back to look Bismuth in the eye, gaze heavy with something unrecognisable. “What would you want to build?”

“What?” Bismuth laughed, far too loud. “Listen, princess, I just hammer away, I don’t make the calls-”

“But if you could!” Rose sounded breathless, and had drawn closer, wide-eyed and expectant and oddly excited, then took one of Bismuth’s hands between her own. “Imagine if there was a place- if you could get the chance to figure it out for yourself. If you could pick anything at all to build, what would it be?”

Anything at all.

It felt like a thousand ideas and wild thoughts were flitting through Bismuth’s mind, yet not a single one wanted to stay and become solid. But rubies and pearls featured prominently, and supports and safety nets and sanctuaries and things she couldn’t even begin to put into words, and she knew yesterday was still messing her up but it was just so hard to put any of it out of her mind for long-

Bismuth pulled away and forced out another nervous laugh. “What do you want with me, you weird hunk of quartz? What’s gotten into you?”

Rose became far more serious - solemn, even, and her dark eyes seemed to bore into Bismuth’s very core. “I saw you yesterday. With the pearl.”

Bismuth tried to hide her flinch behind a grin she knew had to be terribly unconvincing, and found herself scrambling to come up with a believable excuse. “Well, you know how it is… no way am I ever getting one for myself, so why not make use of a chance to play a little pretend...”

Rose shook her head, the endless curls following the movement almost entrancingly. “You don’t have to put up that front with me.”

“Front? Hah, what? Come on-”

“I saw you,” Rose repeated simply, “and I saw that you cared.”

Bismuth didn’t have an answer to that, so Rose continued.

“You were so gentle. You sat there and let her cling to your hand right until the end, when there was nothing but risk in it for you. Not many Gems I know would do something like that.”

Her companion didn’t seem quite so innocuous anymore, and that air of newness and innocence and curiosity seemed to have an altogether different feel to it now, and an odd undercurrent. “You’re right,” Bismuth admitted, with an anger that somehow felt very old. “That’s how they have such a tight hold on all of us. We help them keep us down and use us, because we do it to each other.”

Rose raised an eyebrow. “They? Sounds like dangerous talk.”

Bismuth shrugged. “Maybe it is. Maybe it should be, because we could be dangerous. Maybe I’m tired of so many Gems like me being… underestimated. Or worse.”

Bismuths were easy enough to make, she knew. They were built to be sturdy and durable, capable of withstanding heavy loads and gruelling work and punishing conditions of colonies-to-be. The investment just made sense, but once they wore down or fell victim to some inevitable workplace accident, that was that. It was a loss, yes, but an entirely bearable and replaceable one, and what were a few bismuths compared to a glorious newly erected spire, or a magnificent temple to honour the Diamonds? What was a handful of rubies if the fight was won, in the end, or a string of pearls gone out of style?

The way Rose was looking at her, though. The things she was asking. That was new. “Who are you?” Bismuth finally asked.

Rose lowered her voice conspiratorially, even though a quick glance around confirmed they were still alone. “I’m someone who’s had some dangerous thoughts, too. And I’m looking for Gems who want to help.”

Want.

“Well,” Bismuth said, feeling the beginnings of something oddly like promise, or that bit of hope she’d felt - or feared - snuffed out yesterday, “what did you have in mind?”

The smile on Rose’s face would have been terrifying, had it been aimed at her. As it was, she felt almost compelled to match it.

“Sabotage.”

[soitmightgetweird]

Heart Doodles

Bucky x reader

Summary: You probably shouldn’t let Tony borrow your notebook.

Warnings: nothing? a moment of slight embarrassment but it’s not too bad.

Word Count: 1921

A/N: boop.

It's honestly a miracle if everyone is fully prepared at the mission briefings. There's always at least one person who walks in after the meetings start and it's common that at least a couple people forgot pens or paper. On more than one occasion you planned to just grab a bunch of blank notebooks and extra pens from the supply closet and pile them in the center of the table. Though knowing the group, they'd end up taking it all from the room and still forget to bring it back next time. People love taking office supplies and the Avengers are no different.

Though to be fair, they have a lot to deal with on a regular basis between capturing lingering HYDRA agents, keeping extra-terrestrial threats at bay, and repairing their relationships with each other post-Accords. So maybe they have enough on their minds without having to remember to put a pen in their pocket so Steve doesn't look so exasperated during meetings.

Tony always has a pencil stuck behind his ear. Always. But he can't remember to bring a notebook to save his life. So you--being the lucky Stark employee that gets to sit in on mission briefings to take notes--started to just slide your personal 3-subject notebook to your boss. You carry it around with you all the time anyway to keep track of your daily random thoughts. Most pages hold little doodles, snippets of ideas you want to use in short stories, and probably too many lists of songs you've organized into themed playlists. It isn't anything too personal, so you usually don't have a problem with lending it to him.

The only sounds are the sharp click of your heels and your quiet grumblings as you make your way down the hallway to the conference room. You're the one late today. It's only by five minutes but you still have to convince yourself to actually walk in the room and ignore all your little anxieties about being late that are telling you to just skip altogether and apologize later. You know Steve won't call you out but you still aren't looking forward to being the center of attention as you walk in.

You're thankful that the door barely makes a noise as you enter and you keep your eyes cast to the floor as you sink into the open seat between your boss and Bucky.

“Look who's fashionably late," Tony whispers. He always looks more relaxed in these meetings than everyone else does. Like right now, he's leaning back in his chair and nonchalantly tilts his head to the side as he addresses you.

"You could've told me you guys relocated," you reply quietly. You automatically take your extra notebook and start to hand it to Tony when he raises his hand to stop you. 

"No thanks, kid. I'm covered today."

You're so caught up in being irked by Tony's nickname for you that the voice chiming in from your other side causes you to jump.

"Yeah, because he took my paper."

Of course he did, you think before passing the notebook in the other direction.

When you look up, you see the annoyed glare on Bucky's face. It's one you've often seen directed at Sam and you have to resist the urge to laugh. Once his blue eyes shift from Tony to you, his expression relaxes and the corner of his lips lift in a soft smile. You're able to hold his stare for a second before your eyes dart to the table top in an attempt to stop the blush you know will form if you look at him for too long.

Bucky mutters his thanks and flips through the notebook, just as you hear a quiet snicker from Tony. You almost acknowledge the noise but Steve's voice breaks through your thoughts.

"Come on, Tony; at least pretend to pay attention," Steve says.

"Sure thing, boss." Tony shifts in his chair, straightening his posture then slumping forward and propping his elbow on the table so he can rest his chin on his hand.

The banter between Tony and Steve makes you think of how much this group has progressed since they reunited. The atmosphere isn't always as relaxed as it used to be but you know they've come a long way. The fact that Tony and Bucky are sitting as close as they are is evidence enough.

You start hastily scribbling bullet points based on the information Steve is relaying when Bucky chokes out a cough. You continue writing and scoot your water bottle over with your free hand.

Bucky ignores the water, instead addressing you quietly. "Um. This is full of stuff you write?"

"That's the point of a notebook, isn't it?"

There's the sound of another small laugh and you cut your eyes at Tony. His palm has shifted and instead of his fingers resting against his cheek, they're now covering his mouth and he's actively avoiding meeting your stare.

Your attention is brought back to Bucky when he continues whispering. "I, um... I thought you didn't write personal junk in here?"

"What are you talking about?"

Bucky scoots the notebook toward you and you're immediately drawn to the doodle that takes up an entire quarter of the page: his name with a bunch of little hearts around it.

You blush as you stare at the page. There's no way you wrote that. You're not dumb enough to do that in a notebook you lend to other people.

In a notebook you lend to other people...

There's no stopping the automatic reaction of reaching over and smacking Tony on the back of his head.

It's not until every eye turns to you and Steve stops in the middle of his sentence that you realize what you've done. You've smacked your boss. In front of his teammates.

Your eyes go wide and you silently pray that the floor will open up and swallow you whole. Maybe something will crash through a nearby wall and everyone will spring into superhero mode and forget about what just happened. Your train of panic abruptly crashes when Tony starts laughing. Not like he's trying to play it off--laughing like he's enjoying himself immensely.

"I'm sorry," he says through a smile. "I didn't expect that to go so well... That's perfect."

At hearing Tony brush off the brief physical assault, your dread morphs into a mixture of embarrassment and frustration. Bucky hasn't said anything else and honestly, you're too terrified to look at him.

Tony's still chuckling as you stand from your seat and make a beeline for the door.

You don't stop when when you hear Tony call out your name; you just head straight for the elevator. You keep going until you're back on the floor with your favorite break room--the one with a Galaga machine standing proudly in the corner. This is your go-to spot when you're frustrated at work. It happens a fair amount actually, evident by you holding the top three highest scores on the leaderboard.

A couple coworkers are lounging at the table next to the coffee machines--the unofficial location to gather for office gossip--and one of them pipes up as you pass by. "Rough meeting with the Avengers?"

"I don't want to talk about it," you reply. You stare down into Galaga's standby screen for a couple seconds before pressing the start button, causing your little rocket ship to pop into place.

You're not even past the first wave of enemy spaceships when the door to the break room opens and your coworkers fall silent. The next thing you hear is the scraping of chairs as they slide against the tile, followed by their retreating footsteps.

You glance behind you. They're gone but now there's a Bucky standing just inside the doorway with an unsure look plastered across his face.

"FRIDAY, you're a traitor," you mumble as you turn back to the machine.

"I didn't ask her," Bucky replies quietly.

You try to ignore the little flip in your stomach when you realize this means he pays enough attention to you to know where you go when you're annoyed. You also fleetingly wonder if he silently asked your coworkers to leave or if he still just seems that menacing to the average person.

"Do you want me to go?"

"No, Buck." You sigh and watch a little alien spacecraft take a dive and crash right into your ship, costing you a life.

When you turn around again, he's moved closer and his hands are stuffed into his pockets. The uncertainty in his eyes is proof that he still has a bit of difficulty speaking his mind, and you put a lid on the screaming in your head to give him time to gather his thoughts.

"Tony drew that?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"Because he enjoys calling me out."

You really don't want to elaborate.

You've been accompanying Tony to these meetings for a few months--ever since everything started to feel normal again--and so you've become close a few of them. Mostly Steve and Clint, but Bucky also slowly warmed up to you. But in all your random conversations, you and Bucky have never talked about significant others so you have no idea if he's dating anyone. What if it's Wanda; they sit next to each other a lot. What if it's Nat? Oh God. She is terrifying enough without imagining how she'll react if she finds out you have a stupid little crush on her boyfriend. How are you going to face any of those people again? You'll just ask Tony to transfer you--

"You in there?"

You jump when Bucky reaches out and grabs your hands, holding them gently in his own.

"Talk to me. Please?"

That same shy smile from earlier settles on Bucky's face again, and you feel some of your nerves melt away.

"Like a month ago, I made the mistake of asking Tony something about you. It was something harmless; I just wanted to know what book you'd been reading. I guess when he told me to just ask you myself, my face turned red or something. He's teased me about it ever since.

"But he borrows that damn notebook all the time. I never check what he writes in it... because why would I? He must've done that recently though."

You take a deep breath and huff out a laugh on the exhale. "I don't want you to feel any kind of obligation because of any of that. You probably have a girlfriend. I sure as hell don't miss how women look at you. So... yeah. Just... little ol' Tony's assistant with a crush. Oh. If he doesn't fire me for smacking him. I can't believe I smacked my boss-"

"Sweetheart." The interruption brings your attention fully back to the moment. The soft smile has morphed into an almost smug little smirk. "Did you know you ramble when you're nervous?"

"I have been told that once or twice."

He tugs at your hands until your body is almost flush with his then wraps his arms around you. There's a brief moment of disbelief before you return the hug and rest your head on his chest.

Of course, the moment doesn't last long.

"Sergeant Barnes," FRIDAY'S voice floats from the ceiling. "Mister Stark has asked me to inform you that you're to keep your hands off his assistant."

Bucky's grip tightens slightly and you feel the chuckle vibrate through his chest. "Tell Stark he can have her back after lunch."

Tags: @brighterlights @howlingbarnes @sebstanchrisevanchickforever19