#I will never know

[marple-miss-99]

@only-one-todd this might just be my new favourite photo!

[kedreeva]

Last night I dreamed I baked banana bread.

But not just any banana bread.

I dreamed that I made the banana bread like normal. But then!

Then I thinned some peanut butter with milk (????) and melted some chocolate and thinned that with milk, too, and then put them into separate baggies, and put those baggies into a third baggie so their corners were all aligned. I cut the overlapping corner to make a squeezy bag like for frosting where they would both come out together but not mixed, and then I dipped the tip of it into the banana bread batter and swirled peanut butter and chocolate into it.

THEN I baked it.

I explained my dream to my neighbor and she gave me bananas and told me to make my dreams come true. So. I'm gonna try it tomorrow.

[nanocados]

Top 10 worst babysitters (LQG almost threw binghe in the trash)

[crystallizsch]

I AM SOBBING

HE LISTENED TO ME MY OFFERING WORKED THANK U

YOU ARE THE ONLY BOY EVER

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY QUEEN OF HEARTS 👑👑👑🌹🌹🌹

[thefairyfellermasterstroke]

Thinking about the fact i own 1790s french coins that maybe Camille Desmoulins touched once in his life

[laserry]

*me watching this scene for the first time ever*

Ahahah that's funny he's old and gross

*me watching this scene now*

[writing-oof]

Hey, Google: Why are my favorite fics always the least popular?

Hey, Google: Are my tastes based or just lame and unpopular?

Hey, Google: Is it really so wrong to want rotten men to kiss? And also the rotten women? All the rotten fuckers should have a party actually.

Hey, Google: How do I turn off hit statistics on AO3 because I’m getting sad and—

[falst]

insane thing about my fanfiction class' professor is that he openly admitted that around 90% of the fanfiction he had dealt with was rpf like okay thank your for that Connor. what were you doing out there. in the wild

[celestemagnoliathewriter]

here's the thing. I am not a Swiftie, I casually like Taylor Swift, and I am totally impressed/befuddled/amused by the fact that all these folks are really into the sports now because of her.

now, here's what I wonder: what if Taylor broke up with her sports man and then dated a philosopher? would all Swifties become neo-Platonists or something? would copies of Being and Time by Heidegger be flying off the shelves? would there be an influx of budding philosophers on TikTok, discussing the void and the absurdism of Albert Camus???

[lock-my-feelings-in-a-jar]

[eggydragon]

Etho and Impulse deserve to have their hot girl summer in Limited Life after ditching Joel and Bdubs, but seeing how this is a Life series, i feel like something horrible and angsty will happen to them 

[jaybirdscoffee]

i used to think i was rawdogging life but life’s been rawdogging me the whole time

[streets-in-paradise]

Being in the Chucky fandom as a BarclayPierce shipper sometimes feels like this:

( my apologies to those who are chill and don't mind about us, this is not about you)

[sasdavvero]

im cooking (maybe)

[gemkun]

@oneireth said : ❛ your heart is beating so fast right now. ❜ / ❛ you look good like this. ❜ for dancae.... hehehe ↬ &. 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐬.

      ⸻       where   translucence   had   latched   previously   ,   arms   enfold   around   the   trailblazer   instead.   keeping   the   stellaron   vessel   tucked   close   ,   he   embraces   in   the   warmth   that   emits   from   the   flame   within.   one   that   he   quenches   with   his   cool   touch   —   settling   the   pair   in   perfect   harmony.   as   if   they   were   in   equilibrium.

  his   words   linger   ,   causing   an   organ   beneath   a   wreath   of   ribs   to   flutter   ,   providing   the   truth   behind   his   uttered   statement.   though   ,   there   was   no   need   ,   for   the   roseate   profile   stationed   before   caelus   is   more   than   enough.   and   with   their   proximity   ,   the   faint   thrum   against   a   chest   pressed   to   his   ,   echoes   the   success   of   the   starboy   and   his   ministrations.

  lips   part   to   remark   ,   but   the   guest   in   the   archives   is   quick   to   the   draw   ,   leaving   dan   heng   with   cheeks   florid   once   more.   ❝   ah.   ❞   spills   a   whisper   ,   to   caress   the   ears   of   the   male   awaiting   a   response.   he   stares   at   him   ,   almost   expectantly   ,   and   the   nameless   can   only   sense   as   his   flushed   features   intensify.

  there   is   no   escape   in   the   captivity   of   his   grasp   ,   despite   how   the   vidyadhara   might   desire   to   slink   away.

  but   eventually   ,   with   the   slightest   gap   in   the   fog   ,   his   voice   finds   him   as   eyes   narrow   ,   fixing   on   his   favourite   constellation.   ❝   i   could   echo   your   sentiment.   ❞   it   appears   somewhere   ,   in   the   depths   ,   his   core   is   bolder   than   he   suspected.   for   his   hand   trickles   ,   to   map   gold.

  outlining   as   fingertips   travel   ,   tracing   rich   lines   to   the   middle   of   his   torso.   ❝   it   seems   yours   is   racing   faster   than   mine.   ❞   until   an   entire   palm   rests   ,   outstretching   upon   the   glittering   plane.   ❝   were   all   your   earlier   words   an   attempt   to   hide   this   ?   ❞

  inclining   ,   he   leans   to   press   a   kiss   to   jutted   edge   of   a   collarbone   ,   teasing   with   a   graze   of   fangs   as   he   withdraws.   ❝   i   want   to   know   all   of   you   ,   caelus.   don’t   keep   secrets   from   me.   ❞

[transkingcobra]

They should really figure out how to make electricity from the thoughts that just escape the adhd brain.

I could power my own house with how many times I go “shit that was a good idea what was it”