#I was going to say that it's not about the hetness of it all for me

[hadesoftheladies]

I've been seeing some bad faith critcisms on separatism lately, but I will say I don't think it's entirely for no reason. for one, most radblr users don't read theory. it's not unique to radblr. It's just internet culture. most people just reblog quotes. So not only do we have a lot of radblr users that are unfamiliar with radical feminism as an actual theory, but you have a lot who simply don't know how to conceptualize separatism.

I'll be honest, separatism as a subject is confusing. It has many forms, many iterations and interpretations, and it makes sense that many feminists from all sorts of backgrounds get hung up on the details.

So all I'm going to do is clarify my stance in relation to Marilyn Frye's work:

There is no pure separatism. Not in feminist discourse, at least. Separatism as a concept is ALLOWED to be varied. Not marrying a man is separatism. Not living with one is separatism. Not listening to male musicians is separatism. Many feminists can and will disagree.

HOWEVER, I examine the use of separatism, like all other feminist actions, based on how it tackles the primary modes of female oppression by male persons: reproductive, sexual and domestic exploitation. In short, how effective is this strategy in limiting or eradicating men's reproductive, sexual, economic and domestic control over women? This is also what Marilyn Frye is talking about when she defines "sexual access" as the ultimate form of male dominance and patriarchal power. Sexual relations is the primary medium for male brutality and control. Understanding that is KEY to understanding female oppression.

Marriage is historically and institutionally a primary mode of women's exploitation. Just like prostitution and motherhood. Women are disenfranchised, disempowered and de-radicalized in marriages. They are more easily exploited (sexually, reproductively and domestically) and isolated (especially due to imbalance in domestic labor).

I also examine the effectiveness of feminist strategy not only by how it disempowers male dominance and control, but how it empowers female agency. Things that empower female agency are: same-sex spaces and programs, female solidarity, judicial and legislative power, economic power, etc.

By these two metrics, I argue that separatism, that is divesting from male hegemony in any way and centering female solidarity in any way, IS useful feminist action AND a worthwhile strategy BUT NOT a cure-all.

I get a little annoyed when non/anti-separatists discuss separatism as worthless or unserious because it cannot be done in total or even because it is difficult. All activism is brave and difficult because it goes against the status quo.

I won't speak for all separatists, because opinions will vary, but here's what I think:

When I call separatism or celibacy a preventative measure, I AM NOT equating it to being THE solution or THE ONLY solution. Separatism will not stop a woman from being raped BUT IT WILL REDUCE HER CHANCES OF DOMESTIC AND SEXUAL EXPLOITATION ENDEMIC TO THE SPHERE OF HET-MARRIAGE/DATING. The same way abstinence will not make your coochie immune to STD'S, just make the chances of encountering them less likely. All we can ever work with as humans is ODDS not CERTAINTIES.

Some of y'all straight up sound like that condescending ad for Bumble saying "You know celibacy is not the answer." It's AN ANSWER. One that works for very many women.

"But what about the women who can't?" Wherever they are, the conversation is clearly not about them. It's clearly about the women who can. No separatist is out here lecturing women and girls being forced into marriages about feminism to begin with. No separatist is blaming the women in Iran and Afghanistan for what the Taliban is doing to them.

Every woman and girl at some point knows that fear--when recognizing the ever-present threat of male violence--while a rational response, cannot be the solution. To live in fear will be akin to not living at all. It makes no sense to tell women to avoid every space a man may be in. Idk which separatist on here is saying that, but I would disagree with them. That is a decontexualized exaggeration of what most radblr separatists are saying.

WE KNOW men are unavoidable. But the legally binding and socio-economically significant contract of MARRIAGE is avoidable for most of us, especially tumblrinas like let's be serious. WE KNOW that women do not choose whether or not they are victimized, but there are contexts and situations where your odds can increase or decrease. How safe a woman is when it comes to male violence is SIGNIFICANTLY dependent on HOW DEPENDENT SHE IS ON A MAN. Separatism is not, for me at least, a conversation on PROXIMITY but a conversation on DEPENDENCY. Something libfems and choicefems are NOTORIOUS for scapegoating. Women are likely to be endangered by a man if they are at his mercy at any given point and in any given sphere. So, the feminist's goal is to limit that dependence, in the work-force, government, and interpersonal dynamics.

The question of proximity is ALSO NOT (for me) about whether or not rubbing shoulders with a man on the bus will give me evil male cooties, but whether or not my female socialization will kick in and I will end up deferring to him and his needs instead of myself. THAT IS THE VULNERABILITY. Not that men exist, but that women so easily resort to fawning and pouring energy and effort into men for SIMPLY BEING THERE AS A MAN.

Women and girls need female-only spaces to combat female socialization. Without unlearning female socialization, female empowerment is moot. That's just the truth. You'll give a woman an education or a job, and she'll throw it all away for a man. We've all seen this happen. Separatism as a transitional phase is still vitally important.

To say that separatists are victim-blaming for suggesting that women DO have some say and some agency when it comes to protecting themselves is just ludicrous and absurd.

Not everyone can escape cancer. Sometimes it's genetic. Sometimes it's the air you breathe. You don't have total control, but YOU CAN REDUCE YOUR ODDS.

That is the point of a preventative measure. It is not a guarantee, it is just an extra safety net. Some men can and will cut through it, but to act like women can't do anything about it but try appease men, I find, on some level, insulting.

Because men are not these immovable or invulnerable creatures. Our freedom does not depend on their sympathy or moral sense. Case in point: history. Rehabilitating oppressors is not what got any marginalized group their freedom. Some of you sound like MRA's where the only chance women have is gonna come from convincing men and I'm just not sold on that idea like at all.

So am I saying we don't need male allies? Also no! I don't see why this has to be a fucking either or!

The primary fixation of separatist discourse should not be "abstinence" but "decentering." De-centering men in our lives, finances, decisions, etc. Because women are an important, perhaps the most important unit in the patriarchal machine. It is our loyalty to men, our worship of men, our efforts poured into men, that have facilitated the exploitation of our own sex. Being complicit doesn't mean we're any less victims. They are not exclusive in this case.

Furthermore, foregoing marriage is NOT THE SAME as foregoing love. You can have a romantic relationship with a man and NOT COHABIT with him. You don't have to buy a house together or make yourself more vulnerable either financially or otherwise for the sake of proving your love or living up to this enforced ideal of what love ought to look like. You can have a fulfilling loving community and life OUTSIDE of romance, too! Like why tf are we still essentializing romance and gender in radblr???!!! Fucking frustrating! Like we're adults, y'all. We actually have to outgrow the Disney bs. Again, I'm not saying that liking romance is bad, but treating it as the end-all-be-all is literally for twelve-year-olds idc.

Instead of arguing with separatists about what makes a good separatist or not, encourage discussion on creative ways to live the rich life you want outside of patriarchal institutions. You can live with your sister and have a male partner. You can co-parent with your best friend instead of a husband. You can adopt instead of get pregnant or whatever. Literally there's more options now than ever and I can't believe I have to keep explaining this to one of the whitest parts of the internet.

More than anything, I wish the separatist discussion would open up women's imaginations to LIFE OUTSIDE OF MEN. To focusing on WHAT THEY TRULY WANT instead of what they can or can't do. Loving a man doesn't mean you want to live with him or marry him.

Use separatism and separatist discourse to de-center men from being these beings of ultimate fulfilment. Straight, bi, lesbian I DON'T CARE just make sure you're routinely in a space where you can TRUST that you are making decisions YOU WANT to make and that you are WARY of the way patriarchal society constantly coerces us into being in exploitative situations that benefit men more than us.

THAT'S ALL.

[buubonita]

budbonita. fellow horrortale connoisseur. opinions on the horrortale game that came out this jolly holly eve,,,,,,, me personally i am very calm and relaxed (eye twitch) 🙂

Hello, Tryglybud! Its good to see you again in my ask box :3c okay lets het to the point shall we?

THERE IS SPOILERS ON THIS, so have that on mind before READING!!!

WARNING FOR child death mention, decapitation mention.

That said (rubs my little fly hands)

If there's one thing I really liked about Horrortale is that SAS takes elements from the original game and re-routes them to fit the story. The charm of Horrortale is that it's precisely an alternate timeline that you can believe will happen without problems. A neutral route that turns into the living hell of monsters.

Anyway, now to point out the little things I liked.

The dark twist of Sans' Iceezs puzzle! In the original the joke is that you can't find any of the words that are written (the fucking puzzle is not doing the puzzle if you want to pass it. It's literally doing nothing lol) but here you literally HAVE to find the words to advance. I found it funny because if you've played UT your first instinctive action is to do nothing! It's like that Papyrus puzzle and the colored tiles that you don't expect to be relevant and then it turns out that it was! Just cute, thanks SAS.

The music! the overall atmosphere is super eerie and ominous, the opening song for waterfall is simple and sounds like still water. It gives you the feeling that you're in dead ground. Like the genocidal route in waterfall and its theme, but again, SAS USES the game's foundations and directs them into their own story YYYYYY OUAGHAHA I LOVE IT! Do you think Aliza inhales the dust in the air while walking?

Goner Kid!'s dialogue is literally a reversal of what one of Gaster's followers says about living in a world where everything is exactly the same but you don't exist in it. In this case, SAS AGAIN redirects and gives new meaning to phrases and details from the game for Horrortale.

The underground would probably have been saved if Sans didn't exist, that is, if Sans had decided to die for all of them! AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH I'M REALLY SMILING LIKE A LUNATIC. I love, LOVE the importance SAS gives to the source material considering Horrortale is a timeline and not an AU! It adds another layer of depth and reinforces the plot a lot; you who played the game and knew the story and grew fond of these characters are now witnessing the suffering that YOU as a player caused in one of your games!

Onion san submerged in that pit of black water was scary, I really expected him to come out of there to kill me when I first saw him (and I wanted that to happen, for him to jump out and kill us why not? >:3). His exchange with Aliza is sweet and adorable considering how scary he managed to look at the beginning haha. Horrortale is still a sad story even though it has scary elements.

The painting on the wall of waterfall reminded me of that thing Alphys created to rip out Horror's magic eye, although the description says it seems to be from a creature. It's probably ambiguous on purpose.

Aliza's deaths are brutal. I died with River Person for the first time and I felt bad for Aliza, poor thing was stripped down to the bone! A gruesome death. The rabid Temmies! I loved that they were included, their dialogue is simple but works well and feels in character. She was decapitated, MY POOR GIRL! Devored, impaled, drowned, this girl wont stop going through the most horrorific DEATHS!

And that's another thing with Horrortale, they all feel in character just like their original versions! Sans is still a joker, only his psychosis has made him more violent, more sadistic and prone to darker humor (I'd eat Horrortale's little black humor animated shorts with fries). He also keeps the tendency to beat up children, his character is consistent and that's why he's my favorite.

There's such a thick and obvious parallel with Aliza and Horror when he says "how much do you think your life is worth?" I mean, if he's on her case maybe it's because he wasn't in her shoes for long (although Aliza doesn't wear shoes!)

And I'm not saying Killer or Dust aren't, they're also wonderful in their own way but they're maybe very different approaches, but they work (and I love them too, believe me).

My only complaint with this little game is that it's very short once you figure out all the puzzles! But I can't complain when we get more of the comic in JANUARY (my birthday month!!). I look forward to more story and seeing more characters soon. This was a little treat i will treasure with all my heart.

[weallpartyatybcpatricksfuneral]

"girls support girls-" okay but are you normal about queer women? are you normal about BIWOC? are you normal about disabled women? are you normal about autistic women? are you normal about fat women? alternative women? unattractive women? are you normal about women who choose not to shave their legs and armpits and faces? are you normal about butches and tomboys and masculine women? are you normal about trans women? are you normal about trans men? are you normal about nonbinary folk and people who lie outside the gender binary or renounce gender all together? are you normal about women who absolutely despise and detest the latest trends? are you normal about weird women who unsettle you with their interests? are you normal about women who don't wear makeup, who will never wear makeup, who openly dislike makeup and the makeup industry?

[coolspacequips]

I think if all ppl can say about allura is that she's an obstacle to kl or that she's dead to be kl angst or that ppl shipping her w Lance suck then maybe just don't talk about her ever LMAO

[robocops-a-christ-allegory]

"Nobody knows how evil the US is like the people stuck living in it do" is the exact same sentiment as "Germany knows alot about genocide because their country did the holocaust" like we all need to stop and realize what that shit sounds like

[inkedmyths]

It's not necessarily a knock on ppl but man there's something about being in a fandom and seeing people who's lineup of favorite ships are all the most. Like. Hetbait ships? You know what I mean?

And it's like one or two you can go "yeah I get it, there's at least some canon backing to it" but when that's all they're into and it leaves you going like. Where's your imagination dude these are all so... basic. Like it's not even necessarily that they're straight ships it's that they're the most surface level things you could come up with. And some of this is dependent on the way they treat their ships ofc but still

And its not even that they come across as anti-queer (at least outwardly) its just the general feeling that the idea of something that isn't a heterosexual romance even crosses their minds. They live in a little vanilla bubble, and you're watching them floating along, wondering how they can't be so so bored

[alchemiclee]

been looking in tags for a few days now to see if anyone else found the whole high cloud quintet and related story to be a bit.....poorly written, nonsensical, contradictory, full of plot holes and loose ends, etc. apparently i'm not the only one. (and i'm not even talking about shipping stuff, because any time I saw someone mad about bad writing, someone always replies to be homophobic and laugh about failed ships. weirdos.) it could have been so good but was thrown into the garbage for the most part (IF you noticed all the plot holes and contradiction. if not, then it's a fine enough story tbh. I expect most people to see it on surface level and not read all the little hidden lore bits and try to piece it together like my autistic brain did. which is ok! enjoy it if you liked it and ignore me 😆)

[dblsoul]

i have been out for the count for almost a week with this horrid cold but i am Nearly better and reallyyyyyyyy . want to draw

[gayvampyr]

Do you support prison abolition /paying prisoners a living wage / making being able to vote more accessible to everyone?

I like your stances and opinions and your jokes but I'm genuinely curious on this one.

(This is inspired by some of the comments under one of your posts talking about how we should just make democracy more livable under capitalism, and while I disagree with that being the ONLY thing we need to do, it does kinda make me think about how many people think we need to get better without abolishing prisons or at least treating our prisoners better than we are treating them currently.)

hi! i'm not sure which post you're referring to but I'm actually anti-capitalist. I think we need to dismantle capitalism as a system because it is inherently inhumane, working exactly as intended and therefore cannot be "fixed" without restructuring it entirely from the ground up; the devaluation of human labor and environmental destruction for profit is not a bug, it's a feature. i could delve into the kind of economic system that i think should replace it after dismantling it, however it's more of a thought exercise and until it becomes a plausible reality, i would rather focus on how we can make capitalism livable for the time being because we have no other choice. for example we could start by lowering rent, instituting a 4-day work week, and establishing support networks for homeless people. i'm not an economist so it's not like i have all the answers but according to the results from other countries who have applied these practices, it improves quality of life and the economy significantly.

as for prisons, i'm pro-abolition. you can check out my prison abolition tag for more information, but essentially prisons exist in this day and age as an industry that profits off of slave labor. many of our laws and their enforcers unfairly target minorities and lower class people, and the denial of convicts the right to vote is just another way our government strips vulnerable communities of their political power, autonomy, and supposedly inalienable rights. aside from the conviction of innocent people and people who did commit a crime but ultimately did no harm, i don't think it's the right of any individual (or government, for that matter) to imprison others. i think people tend to forget that "criminals" are human beings and deserving of the same rights as everyone else, and it is human nature to make mistakes. the important thing is the opportunity to do better. militarist propaganda has done an incredible job of convincing us that convicts are amoral and undeserving of our sympathy, turning society in general against them and destroying any sort of safety net they might have had or needed otherwise. and people are too busy clinging to the notion that criminals are subhuman and deserving of whatever punishment is dealt that they can't see that this is a slide into fascism, and that they can just as easily become "other" should they find themselves on the receiving end of the system. we are very close to living in a surveillance state, which means any minor offense or slip-up has the potential to completely decimate your chances at getting a job, applying for college, getting a loan, receiving housing, and especially being able to have a say in elections. it also makes you more likely to be arrested again on account of "suspected illegal activity", so your record follows you around for the rest of your life.

sorry this got so long but yeah, essentially capitalism and the prison industry are inhumane and should be abolished.

[justthatspiffy]

.

[phoeeling]

I don't even know where people are getting the totally-canon "implied bisexuality" from.... like maybe I'm dumb but I didn't catch any of that in the show???? Like I'm not against either of them being bi but everyone acts like it was confirmed in canon and I feel so lost lol. It just feels like they're grasping at straws to justify their ship being "queer" (as if that has anything to do with why most people don't like it....) and so they can call anti-huntlows biphobic or whatever.

It’s from this, I believe. Hunter sewed a sweater with a rainbow that has what looks like toned down colours of the Bi flag? And Willow being pan comes from the star by her head having the same colours as the pan flag, despite different shades.

Which I think is reading a little into it, because they use like the exact shades and colours for the Bi flag (and the Lesbian flag which I think appears as a sticker?) in that episode. And again, the people who do the design for things like the sweater Hunter sewed, who would’ve put the rainbow there, don’t necessarily pick out the colours used for those designs. Colour design is a separate job.

[designernishiki]

“ugh why couldn’t nishiki see that reina was Right There and would’ve made such a good girlfriend–” he’s gay, susan

[sapphicdessi]

Are the bisexual women in that video calling gay/lesbian people queer?

i'm more concerned they're saying "bi lesbians" are real and telling every lesbian who says to stop that "sexuality is fluid" and that lesbians can like men. they have larped and support larpers. acting like lesbian is someone who hates men but is attracted to them is fucking absurd. shit take after another. it's basically a homophobic lesbian shit talking sesh where they speak over an for lesbians and act like incels too

[trashbatistrash]

,

[asmodeusamaryllis]

G3nshin players never beating the not playing the game allegations

[thelesbianluthor]

People be like: they can't be queer bc they didn't say out loud they are!!!

The person in question: the gayest bitch you have ever seen