#I was feeling it on so many levels. being trans and Jewish and how do those fit together. having family problems. going thru change that

[junkjounral]

June 6, 2023

“There is no difference between trying to love and loving” —Joy Ladin

[orphee-aux-enfers]

I. Don’t understand how being against homophobia and misogyny and informational suppression is cultural relativism? Yeah I have a #USAmerican raised Christian bias but I think not being bioessentialist and anti-intellectual is. Normal???? Genuinely don’t understand

Okay so. My guess from how this was written is that you are either a child or just into your 20s. I'd expect much different wording and approach if you were older. So. I'm going to try and be as gentle and clear cut as possible.

1) Orthodox Judaism is actually quite diverse and also different from Christianity, even fundamentalist Christianity .

2) What you're witnessing is not necessarily indicative of the actual community values; you are interpreting without insider perspective, or seemingly any actual knowledge. You're also ascribing motive to actions that may or may not be there.

3) many orthodox Jews, myself included, are queer and trans and embraced by our community. Every person of authority I've spoken to on the matter says that my incredibly queer, t4t marriage that gets read as gay no matter what, still gets the mitzvah of sex on erev Shabbos, and that includes my main community of Chabad.

4) many books are screened before being given to children by all people everywhere for a variety of reasons. Just because you don't fully understand the reasons as you are not yourself Orthodox Jewish doesn't mean that they are automatically something to be hated due to your preconceived notions.

5) Assuming a group is inherently homophobic, misogynistic, etc. Simply because you don't understand them as you are not part of their community is in fact a bad behaviour, yes. Don't do that. Most of the time, in most communities people are at worst confused.

6) As for misogyny... It's important to know the ways in which Judaism actually structures it's sex roles. No one has different sex roles because they're lesser, which misogyny implies. And every SINGLE person I have ever met observes mitzvos based on sex due to actually desire, not coercion. But for example, married women cover their hair as a way of making their marriage even more holy. Men meanwhile are told to cover their head at all times so they are mindful of G-d at all times. What does this imply at first glance? Why, that women are capable of remembering G-d at all times and the men are silly and must forget G-d if not reminded! Do we think this is all to the interpretation?

So. Before you judge our community so harshly... Perhaps also consider the last century of human history alone. We are being killed and hurt at alarming rates again, especially in the USA. Is it any wonder we don't stop in the streets to justify our existence to you?

Lastly, an oversharing of my personal details because as I am currently safe and well at home, I feel I ought to give you opportunity to understand that you aren't seeing/understanding the complexity of sex roles in Judaism

7) so, yes, orthodox Judaism has gender/sex based roles. It also is, in my experience, pretty flexible to meet individuals. I was coercively assigned female at birth. I was however by Jewish law, tumtum. In English terms, I had ambiguous genitals which could be surgically changed. My sister wanted a baby sister. And so, I was surgically "corrected" and raised female, until puberty and onset of hormonal problems that indicated that it wasn't just a genital mutation. I felt disconnected from binary gender, and at time, in part of my community having a label for me while the hospital I was born at had simply labeled me "incorrect", I came to embrace a masculine social standing. Because I was unable to be sexed as an infant, have masculine levels of testosterone and a lack of menses for years at a time, I have to adhere to both male and female sex based mitzvos. Religiously, I am operating with the strictest possible adherence, but this is all written and debated, as are all of the other sexes in Judaism. I am, however, allowed to exist as intersex in a Jewish community in a way that I am NEVER allowed to exist as intersex without a fight in the secular world, to the point that if it's not relevant I identify only as trans, because otherwise it becomes too complicated in the secular world. And this is genuinely because there is actually a space for me to exist in, as there are six Talmudic sexes.

Being trans and intersex is "allowed". Being queer is "allowed". Some communities differ, but I've lived in seven, and all of them have been more accepting of me being queer, trans, and intersex, than any secular space, including liberal and leftist spaces. At WORST, I am met with curiosity because I am new to the community. I think, perhaps, too many people in this world mistake curiosity with hatred.

[beardedmrbean]

ITHACA, NEW YORK – Jewish Cornell University students reported that many of their peers on campus have been questioning their allegiances to left-wing student groups after some came out in defense of a professor who called the Hamas terrorist attack in Southern Israel "exhilarating." 

Fox News Digital spoke to "Cornellians" on background and on the record who said they were aware of a political shift among Jewish students. Some of them are questioning their ties with various progressive groups – and some with progressivism as a movement itself. 

"A lot of the students that come to Cornell are liberal, and I think this is making a lot of Jews that would consider themselves liberal really question that," a student studying statistics and computer science, who wished to remain anonymous for safety reasons, said. "What they will be doing is silently reflecting and shifting who they would vote for in the future…. They're paying attention to… the Republican primaries to see who supports Israel the most even though that contradicts their previous values." 

One of those students currently going through the dialectic – who has not yet found a political home – is Isaac Bloomgarten, a freshman studying engineering. 

CORNELL STUDENTS REACT TO SUSPECTED 'HAMAS FIGHTER' ARREST BY DOJ: 'TERRIFYING TO BE ON CAMPUS RIGHT NOW'

Bloomgarten said he feels "betrayed" by the left with whom he always stood. 

"I've always been an ally of the left. I've stood with LGBTQ people. I've stood with trans people, nonbinary people. I've always stood with them against forms of hate and discrimination. But I feel like they won't do the same for me," he said. 

He has seen some of those same friends, including those he considered close, "make posts commending Hamas for what they did, declaring them as freedom fighters and how they were liberating their people by murdering Jews." 

BILLIONAIRE HEDGE FUND MANAGER DOESN’T WANT TO HIRE HARVARD STUDENTS WHO BLAMED ISRAEL FOR HAMAS ATTACKS

"It's so hard to comprehend this level of hatred," he said. "And they sit next to you in class…I have to hope that people are just uneducated and don't know better and that they are not actually evil." 

Ezra Galperin, a freshman who plans to major in government, said, "I think people for good reason are very much questioning their involvement with progressive organizations on campuses that have effectively justified Hamas' invasion." 

CEO MARC ROWAN CALLS ON UPENN LEADERS TO RESIGN, ALUMS TO HALT DONATIONS OVER ALLEGED ANTISEMITISM

Galperin is questioning his ties to certain progressive groups on campus after some came out in support of Professor Russell Rickford. Rickford is currently on leave after saying he was "exhilerat[ed]" following the Hamas surprise terror attack that left 1,400 dead, including women, children, and elderly civilians. 

Galperin said the comments and the outpouring of support for Rickford was as "regressive as it gets." 

"I know without a shred of doubt that we as a Jewish community, we stand behind oppressed people… It's not all the progressive organizations on campus. I don't even know if it's most of them. But… we can't work with organizations that openly advocate for people who are exhilarated by the rape and murder of our families," he said. 

CORNELL PROFESSOR WHO WAS 'EXHILARATED' AFTER HAMAS ATTACK ISSUES APOLOGY FOR 'REPREHENSIBLE' REMARKS

Galperin added that he hopes progressivism will reform away from being willing to associate with antisemitic groups. 

"But I don't think any of us believe that that stops us from advocating for progressive things. You know, we can be Jewish and progressive. We can hold those beliefs… we're not going to let this stop us from advocating for a better world," he said. 

Amanda Silberstein similarly said Rickford's comments and student groups' responses are "causing some more progressive Jews on campus… to reevaluate how much they adhere to certain ideologies." 

Netanel Shapira explained that part of what is causing some of the shift is that Jewish students, who consider themselves a minority group, feel abandoned.

Shapira explained that he cannot support Black Lives Matter as an organization, though he does support Black liberation, because that particular political group is virulently anti-Israel.

"I find that pretty unfortunate if they're willing to side with people who are literally terrorists," he said. 

Shapira said he is not alone in questioning ties to certain progressive groups. 

"You want to believe that in a moment of despair where you were slaughtered, your people were raped, burned, murdered in cold blood, brutally on video with evidence. You'd like to think that the world was saying there is something wrong with that. And we stand by you in this moment of pain. Not only is there not that reaction. You have people who also have suffered horrible things in their history… justifying it. They're saying, ‘Oh yeah, it was fine because of X, Y, Z,'" Shapira said. 

Sam Friedman also said that Jews are feeling left out of progressive politics, causing them to ask themselves "serious questions" about their alliances. 

"The whole idea of the sort of liberal progressive movement is to be more caring and be more considerate of other people. But they're realizing that while a lot of minorities are getting good treatment… the Jewish people are not. They're almost treated… not worthy of consideration. And so I think… the progressive [Jews] are taking some serious questions… Either [to] make the progressive community more supportive… or be less involved." 

Josh Rosenheim agreed, saying Hamas alignments from some progressive circles may be causing "political realignments" among Jews. 

"I would hope we could go beyond scoring political victory points surrounding that issue and come together in the recognition that everyone, all students, should be safe on college campuses," he said. 

Another student speaking on the condition of anonymity, who is studying biology, said the progressive left co-mingling with Hamas supporters is not only causing Cornell students to question their political ties, but the wider community.

"I definitely think that that's been happening not just on Cornell's campus. I think in general Jewish people feel that," she said. 

[vikings-til-valhalla]

Come meet your viking!

Wanted to update my intro post, so here goes nothin'!

Hey y'all, I'm Magnus! Gay trans guy (he/him) in my mid 20s. Autistic.

I began this blog ages ago, though I don't recall how long it's been around because time is a vortex and I'm too busy to count anymore. Anyway!

This blog is a place for anything Asatru and viking related. It's important to know that Asatru is an open practice, meaning all are welcome. And I mean ALL folks! Feel free to ask religious questions and advice, but know that Asatru is an individually practiced religion, and therefore nobody is an ordained professional, and I by no means consider myself an expert or professional on any level. I'm just some guy with a blog. That's it.

My Asatru journey began as a kid, at 15 years old, namely when I tried to call for some deity out there who'd answer my biggest questions about who I am and why I felt like a boy if I was a girl. Jesus sure didn't give me an answer, not after many years of asking, but when I reached out to Odin, terrified to stray from the religious path my parents set me on, I got my answer nearly immediately.

I came out as me. And my parents accept that, support me, and still help me to this day almost a decade later!

I find it comedic because I've tried to work with the Æsir and Vanir both, but traditionally Vanir worship was for more feminine folk, and Æsir worship for the masculine. I've been the rough and tough guy for as long as I can remember, always playing videogames that boys my age as a kid played, doing MMA, and all my clothes were from the boy's section. I thrive on my masculinity. And needless to say as a result, my Vanir worship has NEVER gone well. At all. But my Æsir worship? Yeah that's always yielded results and been helpful to me. So uhh... even the gods know I'm a man!! ;)

Know that on this blog, absolute zero bigotry or hate in any form will be tolerated. That means no misogyny, no misandry, no transmisogyny or transmisandry, no hate, no racism, no sexism, no religious oppression for any religion, no hate for the innocent whatsoever, no anti-feminism and no radical feminism especially trans-exclusionary (TERF). Any instances I find in reblogs, comments, asks, DMs, etc. will result in immediate bans without warning.

So! That's about it for the blog part! Love y'all, and I hope you enjoy the place!

Some cool things about me below the cut!

I'm an author! I've got 2 published books in paperback currently, with a third in the works being posted by weekly chapters on my Substack. Most of my works are high fantasy and space fantasy, but I never do any writing outside the fantasy and sci-fi umbrellas. I'm big on writing queer male stories, featuring men of adult age loving other adult men, but all characters in my writing regardless of gender or lack thereof, are assumed queer unless I state otherwise.

I'm unable to attend college for health reasons, but I plan to return when/if I'm able, and get a degree in ethics! I am HUGE on ethical practices in every aspect, love debating morality and ethics, I've studied the subject quite intensely over the 6 years I was in college, and it's been my passion besides creative writing, which I don't need a degree to do, but I will need certification if I wish to become a professional ethicist! So that'll be my degree someday, Odin and Tyr be willing! My experiences with transphobia, homophobia, and having grown up with a majority of my friends being Jewish and Islamic, has inspired me to fight for equal rights, safety, acceptance, wellbeing, opportunities, and freedoms for every single human being worldwide. I wish to someday leave this world better than when I arrived for all who have to keep going after me.

Before disability, I did MMA for 13 years. I had 2 teachers, but they split apart early on, and I stuck with the one. I'm still in contact with both! Seeing as I'm better now with my pain, I'm going next summer to join the local martial arts school by the other former teacher.

If you ever find me at a renfaire, you'll know me when you find the tiniest little beefcake guy dressed in furs and plate armor (I'm less than 5ft/150cm tall).

My absolute favorite type of music is metal. All types of metal! Mainly power, symphonic, folk, and death are what I listen to!

Favorite medias are: Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, D&D, Gravity Falls, Destiny, The Elder Scrolls, Transformers, Futurama, Pokémon, and anything Lego

I have an insanely huge cat who is my son. His name is Patron, said like the tequila, and as of September 2024 he's 17.6lbs of man. Here's a video of me and him for scale.

Feel free to ask about my cat son. Please ask about my cat son. I love him. He loves hugs and snuggles. I could write a whole novel on him if I had time. Patron is my whole world and life.

[sychosid]

I don't fucking know man. ranting

I cannot word my feelings and thoughts about the talks of antisemitism in wrestling in an articulate way ever bc some white convert Jewish person is gonna think they got the upper hand on me in the Oppression Olympics about talking on how it's like to grow up a minority and that I can't speak on something I've extensively spoken about, watched happen, etc.

but what I can try to say is that if you speak on antisemitism right now in anyway but don't show any level support of Palestine (IDFK just reblog like one thing. at all. ever.). I'm going to think you're a Zionist. because Israel is a state built on Islamophobia and racism.

And I don't care about a stupid TV program, ultimately. I don't judge you if you find escapism in wrestling. I do too, sometimes. but I can't turn off the real world personally. even for a minute.

but man. some of you are so blatant in showing a blind eye to brown and black people. most of you don't even like non-white wrestlers unless you can sexualize them! most of you didn't even call Samoa Joe hot until MJF made fun of his appearance! you didn't give a shit about Swerve until he feuded with Hangman! And even THEN you aren't understanding his point about being a talented black athlete who deserves the same chances as his white coworkers who get shot after shot and get spotlighted for basically doing nothing half the time. and then all you CAN do is sexualize him!! you can't even recognize his talent in addition to his attractiveness. all of you get real weird about Jade Cargill being very sexy and muscular and powerful and "step on me mommy" but don't even bat an eye at Nyla Rose having been the first trans woman to hold a major TV title, as well as being the first black AND native title holder at AEW.

more than half of you wouldn't even think the quarters thing was some kinda "hate crime" unless MJF talked about it. most of you don't even know anyone who is Jewish and has had pennies thrown at them and slurs hurled. mocked about wearing kippahs/yarmukles, being asked WHY don't they if they're Jewish. do you know what an Ashkenazi Jew is compared to others? what's the difference between Orthodox vs Reform vs Conservative? do you know what an ethnoreligion is? name a holiday that isn't Hanukkah. how many can you make? explain to me why the cheap TJ Maxx ring is just as, if not MORE, antisemitic than the quarters.

none of you will ever ever ever defend a non-white person the way you defend white men.

[hindahoney]

Hey, I go to a combined Liberal and Reform shul and wanted to debunk some of those misconceptions on your post.

Being Reform/Liberal is not at all, even slightly, about level of observance. We have many, many men in kippot and tzitzit with payot who come to our synagogue to pray every single week. We wear kippot out and about in town, we wear Magen David proudly. We sing our prayers with all of the life and vigour of any Jews. Many of the people who pray with us also attend classes with the rabbi twice per week, in their own free time. I personally study Talmud and biblical Hebrew with my Reform rabbi every week. We have people who keep kosher extremely strictly, more than people who don't. Jewish history is hugely important to us and we honour our ancestors every single day.

Reform Judaism is just about having slightly different values to Orthodox. In shul, we are taught that the difference between us and Orthodox Jews is that Reform Judaism adapts expectations of Jewish people to be reasonable for living in the modern world, whereas Orthodox values tradition and keeping things the exact same way they have been for thousands of years. The rules about electricity use on Shabbat are loosened to allow people with hearing aids to be spoken to, to allow powered wheelchair users to leave their homes, to make sure every Jew has the opportunity to get in touch with their emergency contacts. There is no "better" or "worse" denomination, only ones that fit each individual Jew best, if any.

We still abide by kosher and the teachings of Torah, but we do not place pressure on other Jews to do the same. We do not shun or scold others for not abiding by these laws, and are open-minded to the possibility that they have very good reasons for not doing so.

We adapt some traditional ceremonies, such as holding a B'nei Mitzvah for non-binary children, and adapting conversion ceremonies for trans and non-binary adults. Jewish law is much more de-gendered in a Reform setting, with the same expectations and freedoms afforded to both men and women. Many of us choose to keep to traditional gendered roles and expressions, but queer Jews are celebrated even though they are different.

We are absolutely not Jewish "in name alone". A Jew is a Jew is a Jew. Some of us are very very religious and frum, others are not, but every Jew is always welcome at our shul, because this is a community space that does not ask any Jew to 'prove' they are Jewish enough to join in with our customs, and pray with us during service.

I am disabled and queer, and due to my circumstances I must choose how to live my life Jewishly in a way that suits me. I would not be able to do nearly as many mitzvot if I tried to meet Orthodox standards -- because my needs for care and assistance would break the laws of shabbat, and I could not live up to gendered Orthodox standards very easily as a non-binary person. This is why I choose to pray at a Reform/Liberal synagogue instead of an Orthodox one -- I am more able to do mitzvot in a Reform/Liberal context. While I know there are many Orthodox synagogues that would accept me anyway, it's always a case of trying to work out which congregations I can feasibly become part of, whereas with Reform Judaism I know that I will almost never find any difficulty or judgement.

Being Reform is just another way of practicing Judaism. It isn't lesser, and it isn't less serious, or less religious, or less frum. Really, we are just like you. I think the world would be better with less segregation between denominations. Anti-Orthodox sentiment makes me sad, but I very rarely encounter Orthodox Jews who respect Reform Judaism for what it is. A lot of us don't feel safe in Orthodox synagogues because we are shunned there.

I understand feeling more comfortable in a reform shul because of their gender or sexual identity. Though it has changed pretty drastically in the past few decades and there are many more groups to help gender non conforming and queer people feel more comfortable in orthodox spaces, there are still many who hold strongly to gendered traditions.

However, I need to point out that orthodox Jews do still wear hearing aids and use motorized wheelchairs and pacemakers. If it is a medical necessity it is permitted. In any case, I do not forsee anyone judging someone else for using a medical device on Shabbat.

Thank you for sharing. I do feel like this cleared things up for me!

[puckgoodfaggot]

Congrats on becoming a jew!

Out of curiosity, how long has the process taken you/ can you talk about the process for you as a whole?

thank you!!

the formal process has taken about a year and a half, but i also had about a year before that of individual reading and rumination on conversion and asking friends who had converted/were converting about it. also, i think it would have probably been a little longer but my rabbi is about to go on maternity leave for a year and we both agreed that i'm ready now. after going to a shabbat service at a bigger synagogue just to see how it felt, i asked around on a trans discord about trans friendly synagogues and was pointed to the one i go to now. i shot the rabbi an email to see if we could meet for coffee, and they answered all my questions about the conversion process and book recommendations and also like, questions about why bad things happen etc etc. the requirements for conversion for liberal judaism were that i take part in a year-long adult education course, live a year of the jewish calendar (as in actually taking part in a full year of holidays with the community and going to as many shabbat services as possible), continue meeting with the rabbi to talk about questions and also how i was feeling about the process, and write two essays for the beit din, one which reflected on what judaism means to me and one that was a research paper on any element of judaism i chose. i also found it helpful to try to read the weekly torah portion as often as i could and reflect on them and read other people's reflections on them, to keep a journal of my emotional journey and the experiences that i had with different holidays, and to read up on conversion and judaism in general (your bookshelves and to-read lists will fill up FAST if you start converting; i have so many books that i want but i havent even finished what i have). from here, it's just going to be meeting with the beit din (a panel of rabbis, essentially) next week and answering their questions about my journey, and then going to the mikveh, which is a small pool of water for ritual immersion and is the final step in conversion.

some other denominations of judaism may have other requirements (like wanting you to be further along with hebrew than i am, or the process being longer, or requiring a certain level of observance if you're going to be orthodox or conservative) and if you're a cis man you will have to either be circumcised or do hatafat dam brit, which is taking a drop of blood from where you were circumcised before.

if this is something you're really curious about, i would recommend starting off your readings with 'choosing a jewish life' by anita diamant. it gives a good overview of what to expect, and it's not a huge tome like 'essential judaism' or 'the honey and the sting', which are both chunky (but useful). i would also say that books are great, but finding a synagogue at which you feel at home is essential. you need a space that feels safe to be vulnerable, you need a rabbi who you feel comfortable asking difficult questions, and you need a community of people you enjoy. one of the folks at mine always (jokingly) says you cant be jewish in isolation, only when you're in community with other jews. you gotta find that community.

okay, i will shut up now cause this is long asjkdglsdkg. but if you ever have more questions about this, i'm an open book!

[magicalqueersarah]

Aerith, the Last of the Cetra

from a Jewish POV

Aerith is a huge part of why I love Final Fantasy 7. This is partly because she and the Cetra are somewhat Jewish coded.

Spoilers below

This is pretty blatant, since they're an ethnoreligious people trying to find the promised land, just like the ancient Hebrews. This promised land is a metaphor, which is a common belief in real life. The Cetra spend their whole lives trying to find the promised land, but it's within. It's not a physical place, it's being one with the planet by taking care of it and letting it flourish, then returning to it after death. The Cetra's relationship with the Lifestream parallels the concept of tikkun olam, repairing the world. I could go on about how Kabbalah influenced FF7 but I won't do that in this post. On to Aerith.

On a surface level, Aerith is striking to me. FF7 takes place in a world largely based on Modern Earth. Aerith wears a pink dress and bow to symbolize her femininity, a biker jacket to show her toughness, and gardening boots to show her relationship with the planet.

Her hair is slightly curly, which reminds me of my own. Aerith's last name came from Serge Gainsbourg, a Jewish and French singer.

She was adopted during a war after her mother died escaping a lab. They were experimented on and persecuted by an evil Corporatocracy who tried to use them to find the Promised Land, a source of infinite mako, and thus, infinite riches. This parallels the long history of Antisemitism and modern "Philo"semitism(Evangelicals want all the Jews to colonize Palestine so that Jesus will kill all of us and the Palestinians by starting the rapture :) https://www.aljazeera.com/opinions/2021/5/26/biden-palestine-and-the-buttressing-of-christian-zionism). Only Aerith's mom is a Cetra, but she is 100% Cetran which is just like halakhic tradition and how all Jews are equally Jewish, regardless of what our DNA looks like. Even if all of this is unintentional, Aerith is Jewish coded.

Rebirth reveals that Aerith has been alienated all her life, her Cetran heritage and abilities being the subject of bullying. Though she kept it hidden from those who persecuted her, she was able to connect to her ancestors by cultivating the planet and growing flowers at home and in an abandoned church. Aerith admits she doesn't know how to pray properly because her mom never taught her, which really resonates with me. When she comforts Marlene because Shinra is going to destroy her home, I think Aerith is reminded of her and her mother being forcibly removed from their homes.

Even many ethnoreligious agnostic or atheist people will still practice their ancestral religion, philosophy, and culture in some way, to keep in touch with their history. But many of us have lost parts of our culture because of ethnic and cultural genocide. I've had to hide and stand up for my Jewish identity because people would make violent jokes about us, or accuse us of murdering their god.

Aerith is plucky, kind, and savvy. She lives life to the fullest, becomes more in touch with her heritage, and works to repair the world. She fights against a greedy corporation and a Messianic Jew who's trying to forcefully spread Christianity mass murdering super soldier who claims to be a Cetra and the rightful ruler of the Planet. She inspires me as a Trans Jewish woman.

So it's really devastating that Aerith, the only known Cetra, dies. Not only does an important member of the party get murdered, the world loses an entire people.

it is implied throughout the compilation of FF7 that Marlene has inherited a connection to the Cetra through Aerith. In the original game's ending she can sense Aerith before the Lifestream erupts to stop Meteor, and she is able to sense her father in Remake. Aerith says she holds the white materia when she wants to feel safe. The Ultimania reveals that Aerith let Marlene hold it to feel safe during the evacuation of Sector 7. In Advent Children, Marlene has inherited Aerith's mannerisms and insight, and has begun taking care of Midgar's flowers. I believe this means at least some of humanity will become Cetra; Inheriting their culture and taking care of the planet.

So yeah, Aerith is tied for my favorite Final Fantasy character with Tifa :P. She is a great character and I feel connected to her because of the hardships she's faced as a marginalized person, and her willingness to live life to the fullest, heal the world, and fight injustice.

[firespirited]

Mum accidentally ended up under a pile on when she said death threats against DV survivors were not okay when JKR was brought up by someone totally ignorant of the past decade's drama and the very angry very sweary 'death to joanne' replies poured in. She was then labelled a terf by some teenagers for asking why their anger was directed at jkr and not the tories in power which made clear she was British and an older woman.

She's very literal and doesn't believe in death threats against paedophiles either, just that they should be locked up. That's just how she is... Readmore for length.

So I had to explain what trans exclusionary radical feminists were, how they labelled themselves & it's not a slur and how outrage online isn't rational and often isn't focused at the systemic issues but fallen heroes also often turn into the biggest scapegoats.

The thing that really got to her was the disproportionate energy people had for hating jkr but not other authors or politicians who are far worse, the energy for outrage but no political/community engagement elsewhere.

I wasn't really able to explain why people have energy to be mad at jkr but don't do any offline activism or even get that angry at politicians, there's a sort of passivity, the sense that the game is rigged I guess but people feel maybe they might have the power to make jkr uncomfortable talking smack about marginalised people in public ??

It's hard to explain, on some level I feel like people enjoy bullying and when there is a righteous reason then it's ok to engage in such "fun". On the other, I'm seeing this strange manifestation of trauma where people will be vicious with people who fail to live up to perfection (and that definitely includes trans women - think Hot Allostatic Load: it's a great article that explains something I've seen play out too many times but also isabel fall and the lady who made the mistake of griping about being locked out of the local lesbian scene and ended up painted as the evil pervert who coined the cotton ceiling - she was just really lonely and rightfully sad) with the stored anger and pain that deserved to be directed at multiple systemic issues and instead comes out like a firehose on a peer who is no longer a 'good' peer so they're the enemy. I'd love to read any psych studies but I'm not sure what key words. I know a lot of people are noticing this: energy for rage, apathy for even minor changes we can make. I've seen multiple "stop with the 'omg look at this terf who deserves to die' when you're just retraumatizing trans people by boosting" in the same way that people of colour had to beg for folks to stop boosting black and brown people being brutalised, just graphically making people relive that trauma but please boost actions and learning instead. You know what I'm talking about? Right.

I know the world is terrifying right now but the way social media has raised folks to channel it is not healthy let alone constructive. I'm not sure how to help and not sure how mum can ever regain her purity in the eyes of the little book group she's in. She doesn't like gender, she's actually long been gender non conforming but doesn't know any of the vocabulary. She's still processing trauma from DV and being in a cult so being told how to think gets her hackles up even when she's trying to be as logical and fair as possible. I'm scared the gender crits will reach out and say "hey we're real feminists who care about women, we don't even hate trans folk, come hang out with us and leave behind the rude meanies".

I don't know where to start. With pretty much all other marginalisations we have had people in our life to relate to. Mum's got lesbian, gay, black, Muslim, jewish, sex worker, disabled and mentally ill friends but zero point of reference for trans folk above 14-15 (a friend's child is autiqueer). If any of her friends came out as trans she'd be eating every book available and ready to advocate for them at doctors appointments but right now it's just an abstract concept that makes no sense when she's never been feminine enough to be more than a failed woman and never been that attached to gender.

How do you explain gender dysphoria to someone who's never experienced gender euphoria?

This is someone who never once questioned the anger behind some black lives matter posts, never took wypipo or 'white woman tears' personally because of course anger comes out messy and of course people don't like to think they're racist and have to deliberately learn to be anti racist and will mess up.

The problem here is that it's very hard to talk gender with someone alienated from anything gender related except misogyny.

I remember back when I got into feminism and she'd given up on all that because it didn't have anything to say for working class women who love men. Womanism had the keys to her heart: loving men + hating the patriarchy that crushes their souls along with yours, not wanting the capitalist dream but a different society.

If you've read this far you deserve dog pics, thank you for letting me rant. I'm going to try and find some books by older trans men and women from similar working class backgrounds (no showbiz) and some intro to Judith Butler. Maybe something on the left eating it's own to explain why these younguns don't know how to just boycott and never listen to jkr again.

Replies are welcome, reblogs not. This is delicate and personal. Please have grace. She's trying. I'm trying.

[audiovisualrecall]

I will never ever reblog anything telling anyone that a thing they like 'was totally stupid all along' or to 'read/watch another book/show/movie'. Because besides being a nasty attitude, like. That's not what any of this is about! You can't hear 'oh the author is a bigot now and it's horrible' and go 'oh yeah, their stuff was Obviously bigoted and horrible all along, I could Tell, and if you even liked it at all ever ur an idiot and a bigot'

Like. If you're not giving money to the author and ur trying to educate other ppl WHY DOES IT MATTER if you still like the thing????? Stop moralizing ur hate on for something, stop trying to Win at morals. I'm Queer, Nonbinary/Trans, and Jewish and disabled, I hate who jk Rowling has become and I hate her for Ruining what the books meant to me and so many others. I read tons of books where the author includes some shitty stuff or biases I don't agree with and I go yeah I don't like that.

The issue is NOT the book series. I don't care if the books contain bigoted shit, bc fictional content doesn't even compare to how a real person is hurting people. Plus so do like 90% of books, like, somehow I still enjoy the dragonriders of pern books despite some iffy stuff abt gay men and abt consent, bc the core of the story is what it meant to me.

The house elves and handling therof specifically is racist, how she handled characters from other cultures is iffy, and goblins I suppose could be seen as antisemitic trope but that level of antisemitism is kinda everywhere so I'm used to ignoring it in books and movies. But anyway. The issue is NOT the books, beyond 'don't buy them (firsthand at least) bc it gives her money'. The discussion of 'jk is a terfy piece of shit who is hurting ppl' should not become about some ppl feeling morally superior for not liking a book series (or pretending they never liked it) or insisting the series was never even good anyway so its not a loss. It's good to suggest alternatives to read for people who feel like they can't read hp anymore but love some of the messages or some setting or plot elements, as long as it's not phrased like you Have to discard hp like it's trash.

Lets actually be honest here: The books are good, not amazing, not some height of literature, but they were good books for kids. They were good for a kid who wanted to be braver, who wanted to have powers, who wanted to escape - into a magical world, into a book.

Look: The books said people who value others on some idea of purity are bad people, unequivocally. The books said fascism is bad. They said kids can't always trust adults to do right by them, which mostly kids know and it feels good to have a book acknowledge that yeah, adults are mean or wrong sometimes.

The books said love and caring and friendship and loyalty and helping others and standing up for others and being open to new ideas are good and important and what life is about. The books said love and family and friendship are stronger than hate and greed and prejudice. Those are important messages! And that is exactly why jk's move to terfyness (and everything else she's up to) is such a betrayal. Because she's become her villain, she has become the thing she wrote as a horrible thing to be, and she's so convinced she's Not and that us queer and trans ppl (and now just. Scottish ppl who want to be independent???) are the Real villains for uhhh wanting to exist and do our own thing???

Anyway the pt is she betrayed us and she won't ever get money from me willingly again and I'll try to spread the word and convince others not to feed the beast, but anyone going on abt the books is just trying to feel morally superior and is self righteous and trying to get an A+ in social justice which is literally always the problem.

Let's like. Please for the future focus on the actual issues and Not on debating the quality of the book series??? Otherwise it's also obvious u just don't like the books and are just using this as a justification for that, which isn't necessary. We don't have to justify not liking shit, we don't have to sit on that and wait until the author reveals themself to be an asshole to go 'ooh yes!!'.

[tousakamis]

what makes me so fucking angry about this hogwarts legacy bullshit is that its really showing how performative some allies are, and if people aren’t personally impacted by something, they don’t fucking care about those who are. like. i already knew this was widely the case but to have this big of a kick in the teeth from people i know gushing about their excitement for jkrs latest creation is making me feel so horrible.

like. i am a trans goy living in the uk - i am feeling and recognising on a personal level the power of jkr and her gender critical friends and how they are turning us trans people into a moral panic in the uk, how our government is considering taking us off of the protected characteristics, and how most people genuinely want us dead on this island. i am feeling and recognising on a personal level how, with every word spoken about hp, she is seeing further reason to promote her hatred because she is receiving support and she is still culturally relevant through her products.

while i am not personally impacted by the antisemitism, it makes my blood boil how such an explicitly antisemitic game is being excused by people because it has their stupid wizarding franchise in it. it is literally CAKED with antisemitic caricatures, antisemitic messages and antisemitic imagery and there is no subtly in it. it makes me feel fucking sick as a goy and even if i wasnt already facing jkrs hatred due to my transness i would fucking stay away from the game solely because of how vile the antisemitism is within it, morally i think its objectively the decent thing to do to not support jkrs blood libel simulator with a trademarked location slapped onto it.

yet so many people are just! not caring! because THEY’RE not impacted by this, suddenly their allyship is for nought because theres silly little wizards! and it makes me see red with anger. ive heard trans people say how theyre going to buy the game. like... jkr isnt going to personally exclude you from her gender critical rampage that seeks to wipe out trans people. she wants us all gone and locked away in prisons, mental asylums or six feet under. she doesnt fucking care about us even if she slaps a transphobic trans woman whose name begins with sir in her game. she wants us GONE and i am feeling the brunt of that want every fucking day because people cant abandon a FUCKING wizard franchise.

but sure. i hope you guys enjoy your little transphobic and antisemitic blood libel simulator. just know that as a trans person, i fucking despite you, and i presume its the same for jewish people.

[backmaskedliedermacher]

The Genocide Thing

CW: Suicide, Genocide

This morning I saw a meme posted by a cis ally about trans rights. It is… disturbing and disquieting to me. I don't know where it comes from. It is one of those perpetually re-edited memes, the sort of thing people who make the memes I see on purpose. Innumerable auto-applied "credits" on top of each other turning the letters into an eldritch blur. A swole gray man - you can tell he's cis. If he was transmasc he'd be either be covering those things up or have had top surgery to reduce them. He's standing pickup truck flying trans flags with a sign saying "TRUMP LOST LOL".

Memes are about recontextualization, about taking things and moving them into a different context, and most of the memes I see, I'm happy about this, but seeing the "was/were pronouns" joke in this context is…

The whole meme is dependent on inverting the logic of transphobia. You call me a snowflake? No, you're the snowflake! You tell me facts don't care about your feelings? Guess what, facts don't care about your feelings either!

The logic of transphobia is genocide. At this point it's really clear to most trans people. We don't have recourse to inverting transphobes' logic. Behind the Bastards, last Christmas, did an episode with Margaret Killjoy on Nakam, a group of Holocaust survivors who attempted to apply the Lex Talionis to the German people. You kill six million of us? We kill six million of you!

Of course it wasn't going to work. Not because of the logistical difficulties but because people can't live like that. Humans are capable of lots of things. Wonderful and horrible, lots of things. To maintain that level of cold rage, for that long? The people in Nakam couldn't do that. I can't do that. Certainly no ally, no matter how committed, is going to commit to that.

The only other option - the one I know is true - is that they don't understand. One of my girlfriends yesterday was talking about the Jewish American Supreme Court justice Felix Frankfurter's reaction to being told about the Holocaust. His response was to say "I cannot accept what you are saying." The person telling him said, "After all I've told you, you don't believe me?" Frankfurter responded, "I believe you. I cannot accept what you are saying." (This is a parable, not history. I haven't verified this.)

I have a lot of privilege, but I don't, in this case, have the sort of privilege Justice Frankfurter did. I see the refugees. I have spoken to some of the intended victims. The allies, by and large, just don't understand. This makes it hard for me to talk to them. What am I to say? Thanks, could you and your swole husband do us a solid and make this genocide's pronouns "was/were"?

The reason it's not our obligation to explain is because, in many, many cases, we don't have the power to do it. We go door to door talking to sealion after sealion. It's soul-killing. Our lives our on the line and people don't listen. That's why we need allies. They can do it because they have the distance, it's not their lives.

But they also have a choice, a choice we don't. The consequences of the choices they're making right now… well, the genocide will continue until the people with the power to do so take action to stop it. Doing that isn't free, for them. They'll pay a cost to do it. Until and unless they do that, we're the ones who pay the cost. That cost is measured in our lives.

It is hard to explain, sometimes, to liberals why I think they are worse than conservatives. They don't understand. They think they are our allies, our friends, and here is how I will put it. When one of us is murdered, a lot of cis people will acknowledge that. They will hold vigils and say strong words and if enough of us die over a long enough time, maybe they'll even take action to stop us from being killed. When one of us commits suicide, though? When one of us commits suicide, it is our fault. People trot out the suicide statistics as an argument against transition, as if those of us who don't transition don't kill ourselves.

People will sometimes talk about how transition is a choice, and this is true. Trans people know it is true. I had a choice: Transition, or suicide. I chose transition. I am far from the only trans person to have faced this choice. Not all of us chose the same way I did.

Conservatives look at trans people and they regard us as abominations against their god and they kill us. Liberals tend to look at us as, essentially, abortions - they want trans people to be safe, legal, and rare. In other words, they create conditions that make transition nearly impossible, and then when we take the other option, the one we prefer not to talk about, they blame us.

This is why I hate liberals and do not hate conservatives. Both ideologies lead to the same effective end - genocide. Liberalism just does a better job at covering up the genocide.

[incorporealbastard]

So- a YouTuber I follow recently took a stand and made a community post that he WOULD be playing [the wizard game] and that he thought this constant moralizing was exhausting, that it doesn’t matter, and that many people worked very hard on it.

I’d known for a while that he had some takes I didn’t quite agree with, but this cemented that, and, to me, was enough to make me hit unfollow.

I want to reach out to him in the comments- to try and talk- but I don’t have the energy to get dogpiled on by all the people praising him.

So I’m putting my thoughts here.

‘It’s just a game.’

Yes. It is. We are asking you not to play a game. That is what we are asking. It is not because the game is bad. It is because, if the game is a success, all the work we’ve done to try and convince you that her ideas are harmful was for nothing.

‘It won’t give her that much money.’

No. It won’t. But it will tell her you still like her. That nostalgia is enough to cover over her hatred of the people in your life who are telling you not to buy her game. That she can get away with this- that all of her followers can get away with this.

‘I can play the game and disagree with her.’

Sure. One of my favorite games of all time was made by an abusive, harmful person. I played it before I knew that. Do you know what I do? I tell people not to play a game that means the world to me. Because I want him to know that no matter how good his work is, he won’t win my support back until he changes. Does he care? Probably not. But if the people he abused saw me supporting his work- they would care. They would be hurt. And I care more about them than I do about a game that I’ve put thousands of hours into and devoured every scrap of lore about.

This isn’t about giving her money. This isn’t about if the game is good. It is asking if you care about us.

Are you listening when we tell you we are hurt? When we warned you, years ago, that we KNEW she was like this? Do you listen even when we swear? When we get frustrated and angry? Is your allyship based on respectability politics?

Is it based on convenience?

When my friend came out as gender-fluid in high school, my father refused to change what pronouns he used for her.

‘You can’t change them that often. It’s confusing. I don’t get it.’

Yes, it was confusing and hard to adjust for me, too. I hadn’t done this before either. But I was trying. I didn’t give up- that’s what he’d always taught me to do. Don’t give up because it’s hard, or inconvenient, or confusing.

Years later, when I came out, I came out to my mother, first. I didn’t trust him to listen to me.

That’s what your doing. You’re not the victim of a witch hunt, you’re not being stormed by a mob of angry people with multicolored hair and pitchforks. You’re telling us:

“I support you- until it’s inconvenient. Until you’re loud. Until you don’t pass. Until your pronouns confuse me. Until your labels don’t make sense. Until you make too many jokes about packers or breast forms or surgery.”

“I support this group of people- until one individual is mean to me. Then I don’t have to care about any of them anymore.”

“I support trans people until I don’t feel like it anymore. Until I get nostalgic. Until I want to run back to a fantasy world that many of them would LOVE to remember with fondness, but can’t.”

And it’s not just us. You didn’t care when Jewish people warned you that she was antisemitic. You didn’t care when people of color told you she wrote them badly. You didn’t care when she slapped a corporate rainbow sticker on a characters corpse. You didn’t care about the poorly handled aids metaphor, or the surface level feminism hiding a traditional attitude towards families.

God, caring about all of that is just so much work, isn’t it? It doesn’t bother YOU. Why does it bother US?

It’s exhausting to know how shallow the support of so many people is. It’s exhausting to have corporations throw rainbow confetti in our faces every pride, then turn around and support politicians trying to legislate us out of existence.

‘Why do queer people care about labor rights? Why do queer people care about racial justice? Why do queer people care about antisemitism? Why do queer people care about environmental justice, or ableism, or…’

Because you’re not listening to us- why would you listen to them? Because if your allyship is that shallow to me, what is it to my black peers? What is it to the immigrants in your life? The labor unions? The person in a wheelchair you know?

We are putting our foot down about a game- a GAME- and getting so much pushback.

“Why do I have to CARE all the time, I’m TIRED.”

I’m tired, too. But I don’t have a choice.

And all I’m doing is asking you not to play a game.

[writingwithcolor]

Gingerbread man as golem

@yaronata asked:

I would like to write a character who is Jewish and uses a Golem. She's based on the D&D class of the artificer which looks magic but isn't, because they produce all their effects with inventions, like the "any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic" quote. Her story is that her very Jewish town was under attack from a terrible monster when she was little. Her Rabbis made a Golem to protect the town, and it succeeded but was torn to pieces in the process. She was fascinated by the Golem and as a kid didn't see a big difference between it's sentience and person's so was really thankful for its sacrifice like you would a person's sacrificing their life for you. They thought all the pieces had been devoured by the monster before it died, but she went looking and found the piece used to animate the Golem, which she, kinda misunderstanding called its "heart". She kept the piece and grew up to be an incredibly skilled cook, specialising as a baker in the town. I imagine she would make a lot of really good food for the Jewish holidays, or to break fasts on ones like Yom Kippur or Tish'abav. But she also made a town specific holiday to honour the Golem's sacrifice and the town still being alive, because I feel "we are not dead woo" is a big theme for Jewish holidays from my research, so it could fit, for which she invented ginger bread men to be the golem, and gave them little "hearts" of fruit or honey, and you're meant to eat them limb by limb like the beast did before eating the heart. This would be the inspiration for using the "heart" piece later to make her own giant gingerbread Golem to help her save the world.

These are my questions 1) would it be considered bad or disrespectful for someone who isn't a Rabbi to make a Golem, or is this method of taking an animating piece someone else made disrespectful? 2) Her journey will take her far from her town and her Jewish family and friends and she will likely travel with gentiles. Would it be disrespectful for a Golem to be used to protect a lot of gentiles and one Jew in the course of saving the world? I don't want to fall into the stereotype of someone putting all their effort into valuing and protecting very specifically the group that in real life is oppressive to them. 3) While she is not using magic and is actually mimicking its effects with technology she invents, is this drawing too close to the line of "magical Jew"? 4) I like to "play test" my characters in ttrpgs to really get a feel for them before I write. Would it be disrespectful to play a Jewish character when I am a gentile, and would it be disrespectful to play a Jewish character in a setting where there are demonstrably real gods other than the one of Judaism?

I really like this character idea and I think it's cute and fun and rooted in Jewish culture but I really want to make sure it's respectful and as good as I, a gentile researching on the internet, thinks it is. Thanks so much! Have a nice day!

My answer to this is very complicated because there are things I both like and do not like about this premise. First of all, I love the idea of a cookie golem, and I'm even imagining the magic word that brings him to life (EMET/truth) would be written in icing. And I'm okay with the part about how she found a piece of the old golem and used it to build a new golem, because that makes sense for a golem made from a baked good when you think about how people use sourdough starter to make a new batch of sourdough.

However, here are the thing that make me cock my head to the side like my little sister's German shepherd:

1. re: "magical Jew" - that's not a trope I've ever heard of. Remember, marginalized groups don't receive identical disrespect across the board. It is indeed a trope to use Black people or disabled people as supernatural plot devices who exist only to further the stories of white main characters or able-bodied main characters. But I can't say as I've ever seen anyone using Jewishness that way. Usually if we are someone's one-dimensional plot device it's as someone's lawyer, fixer, "money guy", etc, not a supernatural force. So this isn't something you have to worry about.

2. I have a certain level of discomfort with you playing as a Jewish character just because playacting as a marginalized culture you're not part of strikes me as off, but I understand that that's how you gain insight into a character you're about to write so it's more of a writing exercise than anything else. (I wonder if D&D regulars from marginalized groups have written about this -- I've only played a few times casually with family so if I did run into this type of discussion in my social justice reading I wouldn't have absorbed it. If anyone is curious I played first as Captain Werewolf, and then switched to playing as Cinnamon Blade because lawful good was too hard. :P )

3. I would prefer you omit the detail about eating the cookies piece by piece symbolically, for two reasons: a. it unintentionally evokes Communion by having appreciative people consume a baked good symbolic of an entity who sacrificed his life for theirs, and b. focusing on the details of flesh consumption reminds me too much of Blood Libel (yes, a gingerbread man is in the shape of a person but how many of us actually think about it literally, the way this act would cause?)

As to your first question: I'm fine with her making a golem even though she's just a rando. Second question: I see what you're saying and maybe it could be more okay if it's really clear how well these gentile folks are treating her? And questions three and four are answered above.

I really do love the idea of a giant gingerbread man golem. Cookie golem T_T <3

--Shira

I would like to second Shira’s point about not ripping apart the gingerbread cookies. I honestly would prefer they were used as decoration, and other cookies eaten instead, since that part just feels so not-Jewish to me, but I don’t have golem-specific issues other than that. It seems like you have already been doing a lot of research, which is appreciated.

As far as the ttrpg/DnD aspect… I bounce back and forth on the topic of playing characters that are so very different from our experiences, other than in fantasy-related ways. However, I am aware that a lot of people will play with, and experiment with gender in game, and learn something about themselves in the process (the number of trans players of ttrpgs who tried out their gender in game before they were out is high). It’s different with Judaism, and even more significantly different when it comes to things you can’t convert into, like various actual, real-world races. But because people do sometimes experience growth from experiences like this, I’m hesitant to dissuade players completely. I do urge you to, at a minimum, bring the same care, research, and willingness to learn, that you brought to this question.

--Dierdra

This sounds like a creative storyline that you could have lots of fun with 😊

At first I was confused by this part:

She also made a town specific holiday to honour the Golem's sacrifice

But then you really got me thinking about different types of Jewish holidays and how they come about, so thank you for that!

Because it’s often the little details that either make a story super powerful or kind of nonsensical, I think it would be a good idea to decide what type of holiday is being created here:

A full-blown chag with restrictions on labour and halachic obligations? These are commanded in Torah and new ones can’t be added.

A minor yom tov with halachic obligations but no restrictions? These were instituted by the rabbis prior to the destruction of the Temple, so again new ones can’t be added.

A public holiday or equivalent? This would usually be declared by the Knesset in Israel, and filter to the rest of the Jewish world from there.

A community-based yom tov with specific customs only for people in the know, such as certain Chasidic groups celebrating the birthdays of their deceased leaders? I asked around, but no one can really tell me how these holidays get started, which is probably a good indication that they arise quite organically from a group of people who all just feel that it should be celebrated. Probably not created by a single person, as such.

Something she runs from her bakery, not religion-based, but more like a day of doing special products and deals the way many small businesses do on their anniversary?

Now, if the people of a modern-day town were actually saved by a real live Golem, that would arguably be the most overt miracle for many generations, so there would be a decent chance of options 3 and/or 4 happening. It’s entirely plausible that there could be special foods for this day that become a tradition, including Golem cookies. People who directly benefited might also return to the site where the Golem fought the monster and recite the prayer, ‘Blessed is Hashem, Master of the Universe, Who performed a miracle for me in this place.’

Alternatively, if it’s important that your MC created the holiday, something like option 5 might be the best. Hopefully this will still fulfil what you need: you describe her as incredibly skilled, so I can imagine the day when she goes all out on the Golem cookies being one of the most exciting events of the year for the townspeople, just because her baking is that good. Plus, they already have a personal stake in the Golem’s sacrifice, so I definitely think it could be a thing without being an official holiday. Also, if she is outside of an all-Jewish environment, don’t forget that she would have to decide whether to commemorate the anniversary in the Hebrew calendar or the local one.

Coming back to the cookies, sorry if we’re getting a little repetitive on this point! But I don’t see the cookies being torn limb from limb as part of a celebration. First of all, this doesn’t sound like a very celebratory thing to do, to say the least. Can you imagine explaining that to a three-year-old on their first Yom HaGolem? They would be terrified! (I don’t read this suggestion as accidental anti-Semitism so much as getting carried away with a metaphor, which I’m sure as writers we have all done!)

But also, it’s worth pointing out that our commemorative foods aren’t usually that literal. If you think about hamantaschen, maror, or apple in honey, they’re all symbols. That’s not to say that having Golem-shaped cookies is a problem, as this sounds like just a bit of fun that the MC is having and not something that is directly at odds with Judaism or Jewish culture. But it’s worth bearing in mind that the more literal you go from there in terms of tying the cookies to the event they commemorate, the less culturally aligned your holiday food becomes.

Finally, about the Golem protecting non-Jewish people: I like this idea! There’s a stereotype that we only use whatever is at our disposal to help ourselves and other Jewish people, so a Golem being created by Jews but helping others as well is a big plus for me. Of course, as has already been pointed out, this would be an odd choice if her Saving The World team were anti-Semitic or otherwise disrespectful to her/her community, but I don’t think you were headed that way!

-Shoshi

I have to come back in here just to squee over the phrase “Yom HaGolem.” Well done :D

--Shira

[dirk-has-rabies]

Gender variance and it's link with neurodivergency

Okay so this is it going to be another long one

All quotes will be sourced with a link to the scientific journal I took it from

Okay Tumblr, let's talk gender (I know, your favorite topic) my preface on why this topic matters to me is: I'm autistic ( diagnosed moderate to severe autism) I'm nonbinary trans ( in a way that most non-autistic people don't understand and actually look down on)  and I went to college for gender study ( Mostly for intersex studies but a lot of my research was around non-binary and trans identities) I will be using the term autism as pants when I have experience with however when ADHD is part of the study I will use ND which stands for neurodivergent and yes this is going to be about xenogenders and neopronouns.

autism can affect gender the same way autism can affect literally every part of an identity. a big thing about having autism is the fact that it completely can change how you view personhood and time and object permanence and gender and literally all types of socially constructed ideas. let me also say hear that just because Society creates and enforces an idea does it mean that it doesn't exist to all people it just me that there is no nature law saying that it's real and the “rules” for these ideas can change and delete and create as time and Society evolves and changes.  gender is one of those constructs.

Now I'll take it by you reading this you know what transgender people are  (if you don't understand what a trans person is send me an ask and I'll type you up a pretty little essay lmao,  or Google it but that's a scary thought sense literally any Source or website can come up on Google including biased websites so be careful I guess LOL) anyway to be super basic trans people are anyone who doesn't identify as the gender they were assigned at Birth (yes that includes non-binary people I could do a whole nother essay about that shit how y'all keep spreading trying to separate non-binary people from the trans umbrella)  some people don't like to use the label and that is totally fine by the way.

now autistic people to view the world in a way differently than allistic (neurotypical) ppl do.  we don't take everything people teach us at 100% fact and we tend to question everything and demand proof and evidence for things before we can set it as a fact in our brains. This leads to why a lot of autistic people are atheist (although a lot of religions and this is not bashing on religious people at all I am actually a Jewish convert)  this questioning leads to a lot of social constructs being ignored or not understood At All by a lot of autistic people and personally I think that's a good thing.  allistics take everything their parents and teachers and schools teach them as fact until someone else says something and then they pick which ones to believe. autistic people study and research and learn about a topic before forming an opinion and while this may lead to them studying and believing very biased material and spitting it out as fact it can also lead them to try and Discover it is real by themselves.

because of this autistic people are more question their gender or not fall in a binary way at all as the concept of gender makes no sense to a lot of us. “ if gender is a construct then autistic people who are less aware of social norms are less likely to develop a typical gender identity”

no really look: “ children and teens with autism spectrum disorder ASD or Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder ADHD  are much more likely to express a wish to be the opposite sex compared with their typical developing peers” That was posted in 2014. we have been saying this stuff forever but no one wants to listen. the thing is gender variance (being not cisgender or at least questioning it)  has always been closely hand-in-hand with autistic and ADHD people I'm even the doctor who did that study understood right away that it all made sense the whole time: “ Dr. Strang said they were initially surprised to find an overrepresentation of gender variance among children with ADHD. However, they later realized that prior studies have shown increased levels of disruptive behavior and other behavioral problems among young people with gender variance”  SEE YOURE NOT WEIRD YOURE JUST YOU AND YOURE NOT ALONE IN THIS!!

5% autistic people who did the study were trans or questioning. it was also equal between the Sexes fun fact. that may not seem like a lot till you realize that the national average is only .7% that's literally over 700% higher than the national average. That's so many! and that's just in America.

 in Holland there was a study in 2010 “ nearly 8% of the more than 200 Children and adolescents referred to a clinic for gender dysphoria also came up positive on a assessment for ASD” they weren't even testing for ADHD so the numbers could be even higher!

now I want to talk about a  certain section of the trans umbrella that a lot of autistic people fall under called the non-binary umbrella. non-binary means anything that isn't just male or just female. it is not one third gender and non-binary doesn't mean that you don't have a gender. just clearing that up since cis people keep spreading that. non-binary is an umbrella term for any of the infinite genders you could use or create. now this is where I'm going to lose a bunch of you and that's okay because you don't have to understand our brains or emotions To respect us as real people. not many allistics can understand how we see and think and relate to things and that's okay you don't have to understand everything but just reading about this could be so much closer to respecting us for Who We Are from you've ever been and that's better than being against us just for existing.

now you might have heard of my Mutual Lars who was harassed  by transmeds for using the term Autigender (I was going to link them but if it gets traction I don't want them to get any hate)  since a lot of people roll their eyes at that  and treated them disgustingly for using a term that 100% applied correctly.  Autigender  is described as " a neurogender which can only be understood in the context of being autistic or when one's autism greatly affects one's gender or how one experiences gender. Autigender is not autism as a gender, but rather is a gender that is so heavily influenced by autism that one's autism and one's experience of gender cannot be unlinked.” Now tell me that doesn't sound a lot like this entire essay I've been working on with full sources…..

xenogenders and neopronouns are a big argument point on whether or not people “believe” in non binary genders but a big part of those genders is that they originated from ND communities and are ways that we can try to describe what gender means us in a way that cis or even allistic trans people just can't comprehend or ever understand. Same with MOGAI genders or sexualities. A lot of these are created as a way to somehow describe an indescribable relationship with gender that is so personal you really cant explain it to anyone who isnt literally the same as you.

Even in studies done with trans autistic people a large amount of them dont even fall on a yes or no of having a gender at all and fall in some weird inbetween where you KINDA have a gender but its not a gender in the sense that others say it is but its also too much of a gender so say youre agender. And this is the kind of stuff that confuses allistic trans people and makes them think nonbinary genders are making stuff up for attention, which isnt true at all we just cant explain what it feels like to BE a trans autistic person to anyone who doesnt ALREADY know how it feels.

In this study out of the ppl questioned almost HALF of the autistic trans individuals had a “Sense of identity revolving around interests” meaning their gender and identity was more based off what they liked rather than boy or girl. That makes ppl with stuff like vampgender or pupgender make a lot more sense now doesnt it? We see that even in the study: “My sense of identity is fluid, just as my sense of gender is fluid […] The only constant identity that runs through my life as a thread is ‘dancer.’ This is more important to me than gender, name or any other identifying features… even more important than mother. I wouldn't admit that in the NT world as when I have, I have been corrected (after all Mother is supposed to be my primary identification, right?!) but I feel that I can admit that here. (Taylor)” and an agreement from another saying “Mine is Artist. Thank you, Taylor. (Jessie)” now dont you think if they grew up with terms like artistgender or dancergender they would just YOINK those up right away????

In fact “An absence of a sense of gender or being unsure of how their gender should “feel” was another common report” because as ive said before in this post AUTISTIC PEOPLE DONT SEE GENDER THE WAY ALLISTIC PEOPLE SEE IT. therefore we wont use the same terms or have the same identities nor could we explain it to anyone who doesnt already understand or question the same way! Participants even offered up quotes such as “As a child and even now, I don't ‘feel’ like a gender, I feel like myself and for the most part I am constantly trying to figure out what that means for me (Betty)” and also “I don't feel like a particular gender I'm not even sure what a gender should feel like (Helen)”

Now i know this isnt going to change everyones minds on this stuff but i can only hope that it at least helped people feel like theyre not broken and not alone in their feelings about this. You dont have to follow allistic rules. You dont have to stop searching inside for who you really wanna be. And you dont have to pick or choose terms forever because just as you grow and evolve so may your terms. Its okay to not know what or who you are and its okay to identify as nonhuman things or as your interests because what you love and what you do is a big part of who you are and shapes you everyday. Its not a bad thing! Just please everyone, treat ppl with respect and if you dont understand something that doesnt make it bad or wrong it just means its not for you. And thats okay.

[watermelinoe]

This is kind of a weird route to terfdom but one of the things that really got me questioning the libfem blogs i followed was the strange insistence that because a thing was common in one group or they had first heard of it coming from that group, that it coming from anywhere else too was clearly copying or appropriation. Like braided bread was Jewish and Jewish only, hairsticks were asian and asain only, square peices of fabric tied at the waist for skirts were african and african only, dual dutch braids are black american and black american only. It's not that I don't think cultural appropriation is a thing but humans have been coming up with the same basic ideas for fucking ever, all over the globe, because they are simple and sensible approaches to problems. Once i started to question their weird insistance on being right about that stuff in the face of overwhelming evidence otherwise, i began to question trans politics too and look at evidence provided by radfems and spiraled from there. This ridiculous idea that humans of different cultures couldn't possibly have similar solutions to things is really similar to the idea that a western woman has nothing in common with an eastern woman and there is no universal female experiences. They seem to determined to seperate us.

sorry it took me so long to get to this, i wanted to be able to give a really well thought-out answer bc... there's a lot of nuance to this discussion imo!

my problem with the average "cultural appropriation" argument is that more often than not it's the laziest possible interpretation, usually online, usually by some white kid trying to look woke. just a little bit ago kids on tiktok were demanding these like, eastern europeans i think (don't quote me) apologize for appropriation for wearing their own traditional dress bc it "looked mexican." or however long ago when nicki minaj was in the hot seat for wearing a "native american" headdress.... that was actually caribbean.

because you're exactly right, a lot of humans were coming up with the same shit all over the world at different times.

but my other issue is this idea that all of these cultures evolved in an isolated vacuum and were never influenced by any other people groups. that's hilarious to me, personally, but also a little disturbing when i start to get major "Cultural Purity" vibes from otherwise well-meaning people who think we should all just keep to our Own Cultures :)

university is where i mainly observed this weird dissonance where i'm being bombarded with evidence of cultural amalgamation every day in my art history lectures, while in my small discussion sections i'm asked to apply cultural relativity to, say, the practice of fgm in west africa. i wrote an entirely neutral paper on its cultural significance, as if those girls (and boys as well in that case) aren't also people like me. that's just the way "they" do things. it forces you to dehumanize people from other cultures, honestly.

and this isn't to say that the dynamics of cultural interactions don't matter. there's a very good, historical reason why white americans do not and should not ever have ownership over black american culture. to me, for the most part, there's a visible difference in how braids are used in black hairstyles versus the traditional white european hairstyles. but not always. it's not really about the hair itself, but the double standard applied to black people whose hairstyles are called "unprofessional," "inappropriate," while on white people they're cool and subversive. the real harm of cultural appropriation isn't really the decontextualization of a specific culture, but that it obscures discrimination. yes, both white people and black people wear braids, but as white people we're not discriminated against when we do.

at the same time, i love to see evidence of human interaction. oppressive cultural dynamics happen on a very wide scale that can be summed up in your history textbook from a third-person perspective. on an individual level, of course discrimination still exists, but there's no real malicious significance to seeing someone do or make something and thinking "i like that, i want to join." one of my favorite things i encountered studying art history was seeing the way cultural artistic styles combined, yes, sometimes as a result of an overarching subjugating political takeover. and like, i hate to say it, but sometimes that didn't really change someone's daily life. people are very resistant to change on an individual level. look at how many people were converted to a new religion by just adding a new god to their own beliefs.

mudéjar architecture came about because of the islamic empire's conquest of spain over a thousand years ago. and check out this greco-roman influenced gandhara bodhisattva from almost 2000 years ago. cultural exchange!

"emperor qianlong watching the peacock in its pride" from 1760 qing dynasty china, influenced by the italian painter castiglione.

there's a lot more universality to our different cultures than a lot of people would like to acknowledge, i think. it dehumanizes someone to categorize them as Foreign, to label their culture as entirely separate and untouchable, and it feels to me very much like people think culture is something that can become contaminated by the wrong people interacting. and i do think heritage is incredibly important, i do think cultural appropriation hurts people from oppressed social groups. but i also think cultural exchange is very natural and important.

the refusal to see nuance (not to mention the blatant inaccuracies i mentioned at the start that happen all the time) is definitely a big part of what drove me away from liberal spaces, and i do think there are people who have a specific agenda of dividing western white women from other women around the world. specifically to keep us from empathizing with each other and finding common ground. i just think it discourages the genuine instinctive desire to explore something new and compare it to what's familiar to you.