#I was actually a PHOENIX stan!!!

[polysaur]

Ohhh man can’t believe I didn’t post this here

There was a character trend going around that I’m sure you guys are aware of! Here was mine I made.

[hollowflight-propaganda]

Ngl, I'm pretty excited to revisit arc 3 + Dragonslayer for my series reread because book 11 is the only one of those I've done a proper reread of, and that was 4 years ago

I'm also excited about that because then I can imagine my own complex rewrite for it all :)

[edge-oftheworld]

I forgot my favourite misheard lyric and it’s ‘declining me wine’ in saigon

[pleasedrivesafely]

Guess who actually watched Ace Attorney today 😔 it's the scariest show ever, the opening is literally just Phoenix being y/n and then Miles comes in and they have the weirdest stand off ever with a gold chain connecting their wrists LIKE WHAT 💀⁉️⁉️ is this the new form of the soulmate red string 😔💔

This is what people like 😔⁉️ he actually looks like a turtle dude

[mycartoonmonster]

With the context of the Book of Bill and the characterisation of Bill, I ended up finding that all the members of the Zodiac have a thing or two in common with Bill Cipher.

Six fingered hand-Stanford Pines

-Both have a genetic mutation which they got ostracized for but made them interested in the worlds beyond.

- Both are egocentric and smart.

-Both have a thirst for revenge to prove the people around them they were wrong about them.

-Both didn't mean to endanger their dimension (Ford wanted knowledge and Bill wanted to show them the stars)

-Animals aren't safe around them (Ford set a bird on fire by mistaking it as a Phoenix and Bill ripped out a deer's teeth in his debut and in the storyboards of Weirdmageddon P1 he uses a deer to forcibly kiss Ford's statue as if they were his Barbie and Ken)

-Both have a weird sense of humor

-Both are considered criminals in the multiverse (Theft in Ford's case and Manslaughther, Murder alongside other stuff like mass property destruction in Bill's case)

-Both project onto others they see as similar to themselves (Bill with Ford-and on a minor scale Pacifica-and Ford with Dipper)

-Both ended up getting tricked by a conman (Ford by Bill and Bill by Stanley)

-Both are authors! (The Journals and the Book Of Bill, which are essentially diaries that talked about what their lives were, a bit about themselves and the creatures they found through their life)

Crescent symbol/Fish-Stanley Pines

-Both are scammers

-Both share mannerisms, one of them being referring to Ford as Sixer(which led to people theorizing Stan was Bill's reincarnation)

-Bad relationship with their parents but seem closer with their mom (Bill's parents tried to make him blind to the 3rd dimension but it seems Bill genuinely loved his mama Scalene while Fildbrick didn't value Stan as much as Ford and Caryn was the only one worried about Stanley and was one of the 2 persons that assisted his fake funeral)

-Both were seen as a bad kid growing up (Bill by the people on his dimension due to his mutation and the habilities this granted him while Stan was seen as lesser than Ford due to the latter's gigantic IQ and his rebellious nature)

-Both made one mistake that heavily affected the course of their lives and can never return home because of it (Stan ruining Ford��s project and Bill setting his home ablaze)

-Both didn't mean to push Ford away from them nor put their families in any danger initially(Bill wanted Ford to continue with the portal and got sad after their fallout and Stan did what he did in a moment where he wasnt thinking rationally and it cost him 30 years of loneliness and guilt)

-Both went to jail on different occassions (Stan on Colombia and Bill after going on a rampage in the bar while drunk after the fallout with Ford and the Theraprism if you wanna add it)

-Both tend show only 1 eye to people as well as a cane (Bill only has 1-although he can shapeshift and have multiples as seen in his demon form- and he uses the cane mostly in Dreamscappers, a bit in Sock Opera and in the intro for Weirdmageddon while Stan uses a patch and an 8 ball cane for tourists during his mystery man persona)

-Both used their art to influence people (Stan with the Mystery Shack's attractions and Bill using animation and figurines which failed, unlike Stan's works, unless you count the Lil' Stanley comic)

-Both have used a red demon costume once (Bill in the book and Stan in a picture in Gideon Rises)

-Both wanted to set the journals on fire (with Bill actually doing it in Weirdmageddon Part 1)

-They find Dipper's disstress/fear and annoyance hilarious (Stan teasing him vs Bill terrorizing him)

Glasses-Fiddleford McGucket

-Both end up going insane after a traumatic event (The destruction of his home dimension in Bill's case and McGucket taking a peek into Bill eating his own exoskeleton after crossing the portal)

-The times they helped/aided people it ended bad for them (In McGucket's case, Dipper with his new voice and the Gideon Bot that ended up getting destroyed in the scuffle with Dipper and in Bill's case; Dipper became Bill's puppet and Gideon didn't get the Shack's signature hence he had to use dynamite as a plan B and Weirdmaggedon only lasted 4-5 days for the Henchmaniacs while in McGuckets case's Shacktron didn't survive against Bill as they didn't consider protecting the arms and legs the same way that the Shack was protected)

-Both played a part in the creation of secret societies (Fiddleford by creating The Societyvof the Blind Eye and Bill by the Ciphertologists and inderectly creating the Anti-Bill Cipher society by terrorizing 4 persons)

-Underneath all that insanity and very deep in that broken mind, there is one very smart broken guy.

-Both lost their families (At least Fiddleford could reconciliate with some of it but Bill doesn´t have the same chance anymore)

Bag of ice-Wendy Courdory

-Both are rebellious and dislike authority figures.

-They like to do what they want with no regard for rules

-Both abused their power on more than one occasion (Wendy by stealing snacks and throwing water balloons at the elderly when working at the pool and Bill throughout his deals and in Weirdmageddon)

-They've had guts to face powerfull creatures (Bill the Time Baby and Wendy stuff like the ShapeShifter, the Unicorns or the Eye Bats in Weirdmageddon)

-Both lost a mom when they were young.

Questioning Mark-Soos Ramírez

-Both are smarter than what they look like upon first sight.

-Both lack a dad (Bill's died while Soos's left him)

-They have a funny side to them (Bill more leaning to sadism though)

-Both had their eyes damaged by Mabel (Soos by getting attacked with glitter in Stan Is Not What He Seems and Bill by getting sprayed with graffiti paint in Weirdmageddon Part 3)

Stiched heart-Robbie Valentino

-Both had their relationships ruined by their own arrogance, negligence and dishonesty (Bill being an abusive partner while Robbie was immature).

-They did not take the fallout with their partner well (at least Robbie would never dare to do anything similar to what Bill did)

-They tried to pursue their partner after the break up but to no avail (Bill with threaths and later on with offers of power and Robbie by using music as seen in Gideon Rises and both actually using messanges-Bill wasting Ford's Post-it notes and Robbie sad emails and texts to Wendy)

-Both are good with music (Bill can play the piano and xylophone as seen in his apology video and Robbie can play the guitar and both can sing)

-Both insulted Soos or referred to him in condescending ways (Robbie called him Big Dude and Bill adressed him as "the fat one")

-Both had beef with a 12 year old and wanted to harm them (Robbie wanted to fist fight a child aka Dipper and Bill planned to commit suicide in Dipper's body, turn the mystery twins into corpses, disassamble their molecules and almost kills Mabel in the series finale)

'Both got turned to stone at one point in Weirdmageddon (Robbie when it started and Bill at the end of it)

One eyed Pentagram-Gideon Gleeful

-Having too much power that they acquired at a young age which heavily affected them and began their rise to villainy

-Both have a hatred towards Stanley Pines for meddling with their plans to obtain absolute power and ultimatetly ruining their plans which ended with them in prison.

-Both burnt a picture of the object of their affections; destroying the section with the rest of their family and leaving their faces untouched.

-Both planned to use Mabel and Dipper to get one of the original mystery twins to give them what they wanted

-Both left the Pines Twin they were interested on imprisoned during Weirdmageddon.

-Both deep down craved adoration and attention.

-Both lead a gang of criminals but dont treat them with a much respect as the one Pines Twin they are pining on while hating the other twins for thinking they turned them away from them when in reality it was their actions that did.

-Both got punched in the face by a Pines Twin in a season Finale inside someone´s head (Gideon Bot's and Stanley's)

-Both seem to care about their appearance (Gideon worrying about his hair the most and Bill about his bowtie, given the scream he lets out when Dipper blasts him and him readjusting it a couple of times during Weirdmageddon)

-Both ended up in prison after acquiring a position of absolute power where they do art therapy

-Both are snappy dressers and use their charm to trick people

Llama-Pacifica Northwest

-Both had messy childhoods that turned them into who they are now.

-Both are pretty good liars and can trick people very easily (Bill with his deals and Pacifica in the Lost Legends comic)

-Both look down on people they see as inferior to them(Bill with humans and Pacifica with the working class, hillbillies and the Pines before the events of The mystery of the Northwest mansion and Weirdmageddon)

-Both see themselves as monsters that cause havoc no matter where they go or what they do (Pacifica in dreams and Bill due to what he did in his home)

-Both were forced by their parents to act in a certain way (Bill´s at least loved him and were good intentioned)

-Both are fighters (Pacifica by defying her parents wishes, facing against the ghost and the face stealer in Lost Legends and refusing Bill's deal in her dream and Bill could stand a fight with Shacktron which he ended up defeating and in his book its implied he can fight easily against demons or ghosts)

-Both have wore a crown (Pacifica in her debut episode and Bill in his portrait in the Penthouse suite of the Fearamid)

Shooting Star-Mabel Pines

-Both are agents of Chaos (Mabel being Chaotic Good/Neutral and Bill Chaotic Evil).

-Both enjoy partying and to have fun.

-Both have a wild imagination and a sense of style.

-Both like karaoke and have had a karaoke night with one of the original mystery twins

-Both have eaten stuff normal people shouldn't eat/gross things(Bill his exoskeleton and illegal punch and Mabel getting wasted with Smile Dip, a leaf, huge amounts of sugar that would end with her sick, Mabel juice and she once got hospitalized by eating sniff and scratch stickers)

-Both like makeovers (as seen in a part of the book of Bill where he talks about hiding the blood of his past)

-Both think highly of themselves (Bill's bottomless ego vs Mabel being secure about her talents, qualities and appearance)

-Both have social skills that made others attracted to them, mostly loners or freaks (Bill with his Henchmaniacs for their shared love of chaos and Ford with his smarts and cosmical knowledge and Mabel with Candy and Greta by being weirdos and not being as popular as Pacifica and her posse)

-Both adress Ford as "Fordsy"

-Both have rolled in the grass in Gravity Falls(Bill while possesing Ford during puppet hour and Mabel in Tourist Trapped)

-Both put their wants over other people's and/or their needs (Like in Sock Opera but even if Mabel is sometimes selfish at least apologizes and learns from her mistakes while Bill doesn't care who he hurts and would never apologize)

-Both use white out to exclude certain stuff they dont like from reading material to "fix it" or crayons/markers to cross them (Mabel with the dialog in the Comix Up story in Lost Legends or certain things such as her summer romances and in the Mabel´s guide to color with the picture and Bill with a section where part of The Great Gatsby is shown on his book where he mentions assigned reading or stuff like his exes and his former friend The Oracle/Seven eyes)

-Both became gods of destruction, first time by accident and the second with full intention(Mabel by accident with the rift and ending with MabelLand and Bill with the accidental destruction of his home and with Weirdmageddon)

-You could argue they're awfull when it comes to romance (Mabel's attempts always end in failure and Bill fumbled Ford so so hard)

Pine Tree-Dipper Mason Pines

-Both are good at decoding codes and solving mysteries and have good academic skills.

-Both didn't have many friends growing up and were picked on as kids (Bill for his mutation and Dipper for his birthmark)

-The times they wanted to prove themselves to others ended badly for them (Dipper caused a zombie apocalypse and Bill destroyed his dimension by accident)

-The names they use aren't their real names (Bill confirmed in an AMA years ago that Bill Cipher is just a name he picked so humans could converse with him without going bonkers upon first contact and Dipper's name is actually Mason but everyone refers to him as Dipper due to his birthmark)

-Has cloned himself (Bill's are a natural hability for him while Dipper made copies of himself via paper-rest in piece Tyrone)

-Both were adorable as babies.

-Both got obsessed with someone to the point of messing with their personal lifes (Dipper with Wendy during her relationship with Robbie and Bill with Ford and his relationship with McGucket)

-They changed hats at different points in their life; Dipper in Tourist Trapped changes from his green hat with a five point star to the classic blue pine tree while Bill sported a multicolor hat as a kid before changing into a tophat (if we take the theory that Bill's hat was originally his father's then both Dipper's and Bill's were owned by a family member before being passed on to them, Dipper's belonging to Stan)

I know this is probably just a coincidence (save the stuff with Ford as some were meant to highlight the bond these two had and establish parallels between the two, making them doomed soulmates and adding another layer of sadness over the toxic yaoi) but a fun one still.

Thanks for reading!

[clownowo]

I love inventing terrible in universe fandom drama.

Gavintwt fell into a couple months of terrible discourse about Klavier’s sexuality. people argue about whether he's gay or just queerbaiting and then people argue about how this is invasive actually and real people can't queerbait and Klavier is just openly queer the whole time with a song literally titled "my boyfriend is the prosecution's witness". blissfully unaware.

There's a trend of Gavinner stans committing crimes or messing with crime scenes just to be prosecuted/called as a witness by Klavier. he has to put out a formal statement imploring his fans to pursue other methods of getting his attention:

just. please. stop. please.

A few years after the disbarment someone digs up an old viral post that's like

📖 tilthat February 15, 2018 TIL that during a case in 2016, a defense attorney cross-examined a parrot during the final day of court. The defense won the case. 🐢 tortise-law February 15, 2018 Sit your ass the hell down this motherfucker's name is fucking Phoenix Wright and you don't understand how fucking batshit that case is. He was defending prosecutor Miles Edgeworth, who he had previously DESTROYED THE PERFECT RECORD OF. And it STARTS with Wright proving a witness didn't actually see the murder because they were searching for the goddamned Loch Ness Monster. And not only that, the case ends with him ACCUSING THE OTHER PROSECUTOR, MANFRED VON KARMA, OF ORCHESTRATING THE WHOLE MURDER AND KILLING EDGEWORTH'S FATHER. AND HE WAS RIGHT???? LIKE???? 🎩 gay-ramarye February 16, 2018 holy shit reading this guy's wiki page is a fucking trip. not only does he have a perfect win record, that defendant immediately followed this up with FAKING HIS OWN DEATH??? spacejamminninja-deactivated2018 February 16, 2018 How is this not a tv show already. What the hell do you mean he faked his death 🪶 is-the-hawk-video-cute February 17, 2018 tbh if my defense attorney cross examined a parrot and accused the opposing counsel i'd fake my death too 🌸 pinkprincess February 18, 2018 japanifornia cases are just Like That i have never heard of a normal one.

and gavinblr suddenly realizes that that was the dude Klavier got DISBARRED a couple years ago. viral sensation parrot cross-examiner Phoenix Wright. the fandom goes crazy for a few days but then Klavier does a new photoshoot and they all move on.

A post joking about shipping Klavier’s brother with the guy Klavier got disbarred becomes a huge meme in gavinblr and a subsection begins writing ironic Krisnix RPF that progressively becomes genuine and then turnabout trump happens and the fandom explodes again. Half the Krisnix shippers jump ship to Klapollo because they felt weird about shipping a murderer (and did you SEE the Kitaki case? Klavier was sooo flirting with the defense <3). The other half doubled down and reveled in the angst potential. Part of the Klapollo shippers started truthing. They study court transcripts to prove that Klavier and Apollo are in love if not already dating. Unfortunately they’re right.

[nowimjustastranger]

Just a little gift for my bestie Phoenix, aka @flame-cat, because they were in a car accident recently. But thankfully they're okay! This was actually inspired by an outline for an interaction between the brothers that they shared with me privately, so enjoy 1.5k words worth of stangst y'all!

Ford scrubbed a hand over his face with a frustrated groan, fingers knocking his glasses askew. He couldn’t afford to have his body fail him now, not when he had an exam to study for. But what he wanted didn’t change the fact that his eyes had started to outright refuse to focus on the words in the textbook five minutes ago, an annoyingly persistent migraine pulsing behind his eyes.

To make matters worse, the landline rang. The shrill sound made the bothersome migraine go from a mild three all the way up to a solid eight on his tolerance scale, which made his temper flare. Ford snatched the handset off the cradle with a growl, reluctantly bringing it to his ear.

“Stanford Pines.” He bit out, adjusting his glasses with his free hand so they sat on his nose properly. When his prickly greeting didn’t garner a response outside of what sounded like labored breathing, Ford scowled. Great, it was his mystery caller again. Just what he needed on top of an already stressful day.

“I refuse to keep entertaining these prank calls, so if you call again I’ll be notifying–” Ford began in a stern tone, but he was interrupted by a familiar voice.

“Stanford.”

Stanley. That was Stanley. Why was his brother calling him at –Ford stole a glance at the clock– two in the afternoon? What could he possibly want? Well, whatever it was, he wouldn’t be getting it from Ford. He had already given up so much because of Stanley’s selfishness, he wasn’t about to give him the opportunity to worm his way back into Ford’s life–

“…Sixer?” Stanley asked, a breathless quality to his voice that brought Ford’s anger back down to a simmer. Why did Stanley sound like that? His breathing was short like he wasn’t taking full breaths, but there was still a measured quality to each inhale and exhale like he was breathing that way on purpose.

“How did you get this number?” Ford asked bluntly, bracing his elbow on his desk before letting his forehead drop into the palm of his hand, resigning himself to having this unexpected yet long overdue conversation with his estranged brother. Maybe Stanley had realized the error of his ways and called to apologize? Yeah right, fat fucking chance of that.

“Ma passed it along.” Stanley grunted, his tone laced with pain, and Ford could certainly relate. He didn’t want to be talking to Stanley any more than Stanley wanted to talk to him, which begged the question: why exactly did Stanley call him?

“Of course she did.” Ford grumbled, suddenly feeling every hour of lost sleep hitting him all at once. He was exhausted. He was tired of trying to fend Ma and her mission to reconnect him with his brother off, tired of walking on eggshells during his monthly calls home just to avoid saying the wrong thing and causing unnecessary drama, and he was tired of putting up with the part of him that still cared about his brother.

“I… I think my ribs are broken.” Stanley said quietly and Ford’s brain shrieked to a standstill, his grip momentarily going slack on the handset as he tried to process the implications of such an ominous statement, forcing him to fumble with it until he managed to press the receiver back against his ear.

“What?” Ford barked, tone incredulous and concerned in equal measure. He resolutely ignored the way that his hands trembled, his grip white-knuckle tight on the handset.

"My ribs. I think–” Stan cut himself off as his breath hitched, a pained hiss following shortly after. Ford found himself leaning forward, blankly staring into the middle distance as he strained his ears to hear every little shift in Stanley’s breathing, trying to assess his brother’s current state. “Nevermind. Shit. Not important right now.”

“Not impor– You can’t be serious, Stanley!?” Ford seethed, lurching out of his chair, uncaring as it tipped back and crashed to the floor as he began to pace. He made sure to stay within the range that the cord allowed him, but he simply couldn’t sit still when Stanley was hurt and possibly even suffering from a head wound considering that he wasn’t making any fucking sense–

“I’m fine. It’s fine. I just…” Stanley spoke in starts and stops, his breathing strained as he spoke through what sounded like clenched teeth. “I need…”

“What? What do you need? What happened?” Ford prompted with urgency, fingers curling and uncurling anxiously. He had to know. He couldn’t estimate the severity of Stanley’s injuries without more data, right now he was left with what his imagination could produce. He needed facts in order to combat the increasingly horrible scenarios that his mind was dredging up.

“Car crash.” Stan said on an exhale and Ford nodded even though his brother wouldn’t be able to see it, pinching the bridge of his nose as his useless brain fixated on those two words.

“What else hurts? Or is it just your ribs?” Ford asked tersely, moving back to his desk with a determined stride to grab a piece of paper at random along with the pen that he had tucked behind his ear earlier. He scribbled down Stanley’s comment about his potentially busted ribs and then let the pen hover as he waited for Stanley’s –hopefully detailed– analysis of his person.

“I dunno… stomach hurts. Kinda swollen.” Stanley mumbled, sucking in a sharp breath as he presumably prodded at the area in question.

“Lightheadedness? Nausea?” Ford pressed, his heart lurching into his throat as several injuries came to mind, internal bleeding being the most likely explanation. Stanley had already displayed textbook signs of internal bleeding, such as disorientation and shortness of breath.

“Both? Feelin’ a bit sluggish too.” Stanley admitted, the muted rustle of clothes indicating that he had adjusted.

“Is the cord long enough for you to sit down?” Ford asked, looking up when the door opened and Fiddleford stepped into the room. Ford frantically waved him over, writing a message for Fiddleford in the notebook before sidestepping so he could read it when he hurried over.

“I think so? Lemme just…” Stanley huffed, Ford splitting his attention between the sound of Stanley gingerly lowering himself to the ground and Fiddleford’s rapidly paling face as the man read through Ford’s notes of Stanley’s wellbeing.

“Stanley? Stanley, are you there?” Ford prompted when there was nothing but harsh breathing for several seconds, sharing a look with an equally rattled Fiddleford.

“Yeah… yeah ‘m here.” Stanley panted, his speech slurred, and Fiddleford hurried from the room to contact emergency services with a different phone. As soon as Ford got a location, he would relay the address to Fiddleford and then stay on the line with Stanley for as long as he could before the call cut out.

“Where exactly is ‘here’, Stanley? Where are you?” Ford asked, rapidly tapping his pen on the notebook just to have something to do since he couldn’t get his hands on his brother like he desperately wanted. He hated feeling so useless.

“Uh… outside a 7/11.” Stanley said weakly, his voice barely a whisper.

“Which 7/11?” Ford demanded, his eyes narrowing. Either Stanley was losing consciousness, or he was losing his grip on lucidity. Neither were ideal considering the circumstances. Ford didn’t have enough information to confidently deduce how hurt his brother was. These could be Stanley’s last moments and Ford was wasting his breath giving him the third degree instead of saying anything of value–

“Um… I dunno.” Stanley said with the vocal equivalent of a shrug and Ford suddenly felt the inexplicable urge to scream.

“An address, Stanley.” Ford clarified in a clipped tone, impatiently tapping his foot as emotions built up in his esophagus, bubbling up despite his best efforts to stuff them back down into their vault. This could be his last opportunity to say something. Anything. Ford couldn’t squander this rare chance, couldn’t let Stanley fade away without knowing that his big brother lo–

“I dunno, s-somewhere in New Mexico, I guess.” Stanley murmured, sounding a little less strained but just as tired. Sitting down had eased some of the stress that his body was under then. Good.

“Just stay there, Stanley. You hear me? Don’t move.” Ford said sternly, speaking slowly and clearly so Stanley’s muddled brain could register the words and damn well heed them. Ford knew that Fiddleford could triangulate Stanley’s position using the phone call, but he wasn’t going anywhere until the call ended.

“M’kay.” Stanley agreed, his voice so quiet that Ford wouldn’t have caught it if his entire focus hadn’t been on his brother. Ford ran a hand through his hair, gripping it at the roots and tugging as he stared down at the notebook, bloodshot eyes roaming over his messily scrawled notes.

“I’ll meet you at the nearest ho–” Ford assured, unceremoniously cut off when the line abruptly went dead. “–spital.”

Fuck.

Fuck.

“God fucking damnit!” Ford snarled, slamming the handset onto the cradle with excessive force before turning on his heel to sprint out of the room and track down Fiddleford. Then Ford would take over the call with emergency services while his roommate used his skills to locate Stanley, sending an ambulance to him.

College could wait, Ford’s brother needed him.

[inbarfink]

Okay, I’ve been considering it for quite a bit and I think that if Tumblr existed in Japanifornia… most of us would probably not be aware of the series’ main characters.

Like, lawyers just don’t tend to be high-profile publicly-known figures. Even within True Crime communities or the coverage of high-public-interest cases, people don’t tend to focus on the lawyers as much more than a representative of the defendant and the legal system as a whole. And yeah, you can say this is just because real-life lawyers are Boring and if they did the kind of Bonkers Shit AA Lawyers do we would pay attention to them… but we do actually have textual evidence that Japanifornia treats lawyers not-too-differently than real life.

Mia’s murder, and probably the uncovering of all of Bluecorp’s dirty dealing, was highly talked about, but Phoenix’s actions in court went kinda ignored. And note that this is the case where Phoenix literally defended himself and broke the Demon Prosecutor’s five years winning streak, and that wasn’t enough to draw eyes to his part in this whole case. 

And that’s also generally consistent with how characters treat Phoenix throughout the rest of the games. By the AJ Trilogy era, it’s clear that Phoenix has made quite a name for himself… in the legal world. If you are yourself a lawyer or another sort of legal professional or just unusually interested in court proceeding, you know the name ‘Phoenix Wright’ 

But if you’re just a regular person who cares about the law the Regular Amount, you probably have no idea who this is.

So I’d guess most of Japanifornian Tumblr would probably be aware of a lot of the cases in the games, especially considering how many of them concern, like, corporate corruption and organized crime and legal corruption and international politics and the entertainment industry and other such stuff that makes it likely to get national/international news coverage. And also so many of them are so bizarre and wacky and are thus prime meme fodder…

But most people wouldn’t necessarily know the name of the lawyer the Nickel Samurai blackmailed to defend him after he ordered an assassin to kill the Jammin’ Ninja, or even how involved that lawyer actually was in Matt Engarde’s downfall.

But there would probably be a small mini-fandom of Tumblrina Lawyers and other legal nerds who are ABSOLUTELY obsessed with the WAA, and trying to collect any piece of info they can find about their adventures. 

(That’s also another aspect to consider, the general public in Japanifornia does not have full knowledge of everything we get to see in the game. News coverage of the smaller cases would be extremely minimal and very regional - and even the bigger cases probably won’t give you a full line-by-line record of everything that happened in Court. Apollo Justice was, like, the Biggest Phoenix Wright Stan in the Universe and he had very choppy and partial knowledge of the Gramarye Trial. We have to consider that even folks who are trying to keep track of the AA Lawyers in-universe would not get the full picture from the media. And that’s before we get into fake news and rumors.)

And meanwhile, the rest of Tumblr would probably treat that Fandom the same sort of bemused delight we give to, like, the extremely dedicated gimmick blogs. Like, you’d probably see less posts about Phoenix and Co. as you’d see posts memeing about the fact there’s a Tumblr Fandom for ‘some random law agency in Japanifornia’, they’d be like five thousands people in the notes going “There’s a Tumblr Fandom for WHAT? WHY IS THIS THE FIRST TIME I’M HEARING ABOUT THIS??” and then one person from the WAA fandom going “NO YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THIS IS THE GUY WHO UNCOVERED THE PHANTOM HE’S JUMPED OFF A BURNING BRIDGE ONCE YOU LITERALLY TALKED ABOUT A TRIAL HE DID YESTERDAY YOU JUST DON’T KNOW HE WAS INVOLVED”. 

Now, that’s all for the Defense Attorneys. The Prosecutors have a bit more publicity. I mean, Phoenix literally heard about Prosecutor Edgeworth on the news.

But also… I do think this publicity is highly regional. Like, Phoenix ended up stumbling on newspaper coverage of Miles because he lives in the same city as him. I’m guessing that most of the series’ Prosecutors are at least casually known not just to Legal Folks, but also generally to people within Los Angetokyo and people involved in Japanifornian Politics… but also not much outside of that sphere either. Again, the series does establish that they are not that well-known amongst laypeople even when they are famous amongst other lawyers

And are generally recognized by fellow legal professionals and journalists and people involved in criminal activity. So the situation with them won’t be that different than with the WAA, they might be a tad more high-profile, depending on how many Tumblr users are specifically from Japaniforina and wanna make memes about the local politics… but those who will get really invested in their misadventures won’t be that different from the kind of people who’d get really into Phoenix Wright. 

Klavier is the obvious exception. Like most Famous Lawyers, he’s actually primarily famous for something other than law. It’s just that in his case, instead of politics, it’s being a world-famous rock star. There’s plenty of textual evidence that the Gavinners are an actual household name and they’d probably have a pretty sizable Tumblr Fandom, but… well… while I assume any casual Gavinner fan knows that Klavier is also a Prosecutor, I’d guess only the insanely dedicated fans and the Haters looking for something problematic would actually start digging into the records of the cases he worked on. But then again, Tumblr does have a lot of insanely dedicated fans and Haters, so maybe Legal Misadventures Involving Klavier would be kinda mainstream on Japanifornia Tumblr.

[serpentthecrow]

Sleepy time with the grishaverse characters

A/n: I... Don't even... Sorry about that. My executive dysfunction did its magic. But here you have this as a peace offering since you guys liked the crows one. I can't even believe how long it's been. I'm probably not going to keep writing too many fics, if any at all. But this one's mandatory. And short.

Summary: headcannons on the sleeping habits of (some of) the grishaverse characters.

Alina Starkov

Hear me out

The girl's out like a light

Exactly the type of person to roll around the bed, end up in peculiar positions, and mainly, accidentally slap you or kick you in her sleep

Isn't picky, but if she COULD choose- only the softest mattress, duvet and pillows

She's petty like that

Has absolutely no night routine. Like. NONE.

Owns no pajamas. Just normal clothes passing as sleep clothes.

Gonna use her sun summoner powers when getting up in the middle of the night to fetch water etc., only to curse profusely because ✨light sensitivity✨

Midnight snacks. No elaboration is needed.

Definitely owns a stag plushie. Cause poor thing.

Mal Oretsev

Sleeps like he's in a coffin

No honestly. Like, on his back, straight as a plank. Psychopath.

The nightmares tho.

The biggest duvet stealer

Never actually uses the duvet tho. Kicks it away every time

Can barely be bothered to change

Absolutely cannot be bothered to make the bed

Hasn't got a single idea how to put on a bedsheet

Red flag: eats in bed too often

Occasionally has a dream about Nikolai throwing him overboard Volkvolny and grinning down at him, saints know why.

Would fall asleep under any circumstance. Light, loud sounds, anything. Bang two pans repeatedly next to his head, and the guy will still fall asleep if he's sure he can afford to.

Has a phoenix plushie. Pun intended.

Aleksander Morozova

does this guy even sleep? Questionable.

But in case he does:

A side sleeper

Surprisingly heavy sleeper

Rarely sleeps in bed when unsupervised tho. Not uncommon for him to fall asleep in a chair.

Black silk sheets only.

Talks in his sleep

Seriously.

If someone walked in on him sleeping, he'd be long since executed for treason.

Absolutely unaffected by caffeine

Produces a whole lotta shadows before going to sleep, roused by the slightest amount of light.

The extensive night routine is canon.

Doesn't have a plushie. The only one in this hc series btw.

Nikolai Lantsov

my favorite sailor bo- anyway

(Let's ignore Volkralai for the purpose of these hc's)

A stomach sleeper. We stan.

A pillow hugger. We stan.

Mostly blue bedding, especially in the palace or the spinning wheel, since we all know he misses the sea.

Another one with a whole-ass night routine.

Reduced amount of clothes when sleeping- usually just pants

They're pajama pants tho

Has some trouble falling asleep on land, he's used to the rocking of the ship

nap king, especially as Sturmhond

Reads a LOT before bed

A night owl- has to be reminded to got to sleep

Sometimes starts to rant about some invention of his

C A N N O T fall asleep without cuddles. Like, he's physically unable

The biggest manchild about waking up early.

Has a fox plushie. A fact.

Genya Safin

babygirl has nightmares, okay? Gotta start with that.

lowkey got accustomed to some level of luxury in Os Alta

not the biggest fan of cuddling. For understandable reasons

a warm beverage before bed

fuzzy socks

tries to maintain an exact time to go to sleep but ultimately fails because she's got trouble falling asleep

probably improves on her sleeping habits once she becomes a part of the triumvirateonly cause she has to tho

overthinking before sleep queen

does she have a plushie? Does David count? You tell me.

[science-lings]

More info on the options below the cut

1- My guy just lost his job and has to live out of his old office there's no way he can be allowed to adopt Trucy immediately, but if he had a rich husband who lives overseas and lets them technically commit fraud by moving into his old apartment during social worker visits... that would be much easier. Edgeworth isn't against being a little underhanded in his methods with the law and he has witnessed Phoenix with the Feys so if an infamous attorney were to adopt a child left behind by a tragic trial, he'd be so glad it was Phoenix. That guy has been reeking dad energy for years. It's also important to note that no one doubted the authenticity of their relationship since they went to go sign the papers because most people who have seen them already assumed that they were together. They don't have to try to convince anyone.

2- The things they call each other are so important to me, as kids they're Miles and Phoenix/Nick, in court they're Mr. Edgeworth and Mr. Wright, outside of court but still in a professional setting they're Edgeworth and Wright, when they're flirting they're back to Miles and Phoenix, but when they're insufferably flirting, Pheonix is 'Mr. Edgeworth' and Miles is 'Mr. Wright' They do this before they get married, both legally and actually.

3- They would be so funny on a reality tv show or some kind of game show, if their motive is doing something better than the other, they will put their whole pussies into whatever that thing is, even if it's like the great british baking show and Phoenix is the only one who can kind of bake. If they get to work together they're insane, put these assholes in an escape room and they will fuck that shit up. With Miles, who learned how to pick locks, and Phoenix, who got used to puzzles when working with Professor Layton, they would speedrun an escape room.

4- idk Pheonix just seems like he gets super affectionate with the people he loves, he kisses Trucys forehead/head so constantly it's habitual for him to pop off her hat to smooch her scalp and replace it right after. I also think it would be funny if he was so unprofessional about his love for Edgeworth except when they're in court but that's because they have to stand like twenty feet away from each other. Edgeworth turns red every time but he rarely protests, at least not seriously.

5- I just think they should be each other's 'oh shit' moment because that is funny to me. Phoenix didn't really realize he was attracted to men, at least in that capacity until that newspaper article and Miles had accepted that he was aro until he caught feelings he thought he was immune to. They both deal with it so well... /s

6- Connected to my hc that lawyers in the AA universe get kind of a celebrity status, but both Phoenix and Miles are so offline that they are completely unaware of it. Maya and Trucy and Kay especially are definitely not unaware and they think it's so funny. They contribute to the rumors. There are Edgeworth and Phoenix fancams made from court footage set to kpop. Apollo had a Phoenix Wright stan account and he used to fight the PW haters on twitter before he actually met the guy. He forgot the password so he can't delete it and it's only a matter of time before someone connects the dots. Anyway they trend on twitter every time they meet in court like when a new season of a show comes out and the fanbase goes bonkers.

7- obviously they call and message each other but they both think it's nostalgic to send letters, and Phoenix likes having a reason to send physical pictures from when they were kids since Miles wasn't allowed to keep any of that in the Von Karma household. Edgeworth usually sends sweets from whatever country he's in for Trucy.

8- I personally think that Phoenix has more of that kitten look but I was recently reminded of how often in the of trilogy when ppl have to tell him to put those things away. He can weaponize his big brown eyes and Miles pretends to be unaffected but he's weak to it just like everyone else. He has that kitty vibe, he asks for things by looking really pathetic and sad and it works in his favor every time.

9- Phoenix is the type of guy to fall asleep during most movies if he isn't judging it intently or particularly interested and when they were kids they tried to binge more than one samurai movie and Phoenix fell asleep before the first one ended. That official art just makes him look like such a sleepy guy. Again the kitty energy returns, he's a big napper.

10- these bitches are so good at arguing, but they both want to win so it takes forever to decide on things that actually don't matter that much. If they can't decide on a restaurant to go to for a date they won't finish arguing their case about their preferred place to go until after they close. They never yell at each other or get too emotionally invested in a lot of things but they will draw that shit out and take out evidence and witness testimony if it helps their case. Sometimes it gets so extensive that they have to pull out the whiteboard/ corkboard. Just as long as it's presented like a court case it will be so well communicated between them so they take advantage of that because or else they kinda suck at talking to each other about their problems.

[hollowed-theory-hall]

this is probably stupid to ask, but do you like snape? or the marauders? there's always fanwars happening between marauders stans and snape stans. tbh i'm just curious where you stand (i like both, and prefer their canon selves rather than the fanon which is btw really stupid. they feminized sirius so much its not even sirius anymore.) what made you like snape? if you do, or are you neutral with him? just for a change of question since i always ask about harry.

Thanks for the ask! I don't think it's stupid.

I prefer their canon counterparts as well, the Marauders fanon has so little to do with canon I can hardly call the characters by the same name. They just aren't the same characters. Anyway, I'm gonna try and summarise my highly subjective opinions about them here.

1. Sirius Black

He's my second most favorite character and my favorite among the characters you mentioned. I wrote about him a lot on this blog, so I don't really feel the need to write more.

But, he's smart, resilient, and goofy on occasion. His love for Harry is one of my favorite aspects of his character because he loves Harry so much. And he has his flaws. He can be cruel, cold, and arrogant and I wouldn't like him as much if he wasn't visibly a member of The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black regardless of how much he tried to get away from his legacy. I love how messy his feelings about his family are. He left Regulus' room as it was, even though the rest of the house got cleaned by the Order. He stayed in his mother's bedroom even when all the conversations he had with her portrait were in screams. I love his distrust in Dumbledore after everything he's been through and how he chooses to remain for Harry's sake — he's willing to do anything for Harry's sake.

I just truly love Sirius.

2. Severus Snape

He's the next on this list because I do like Snape, he's not a character I'm passionate about, but I like him. I think he shouldn't be a teacher (I think he hates being a teacher more than his students hate him teaching them) but he's a talented potion maker and wizard. And he is a very entertaining character, even without knowing everything about him.

But what really makes me like Snape is that I find him interesting. I think his psychology is interesting, as is his dynamic with Lily, Dumbledore, and Voldemort. Snape is a fascinating character to study from a lot of angles, and even as a reader, there is quite a bit that's up in the air about him because he's that good at being a spy and not giving us anything.

The other major thing I like about him is his competence as a spy and wizard. If there's one thing I love in my fictional characters — it's competence (and intelligence). I often joke with my irl friends that Snape is the only competent Death Eater and the only competent member of the Order of the Phoenix. We then joke that if we were in his shoes, surrounded by a lot of people who don't actually do anything and we're the only ones affecting this war from both sides, we'd probably be bitter too.

A little note that seems overlooked about Snape often in the fandom, in general, is how we think, "Oh, he's so great at Occlumancy and not being emotional" — that's not strictly true. When it comes to Lily or the Marauders all his well-crafted Occlumancy kinda goes out the window. In books 3 and 5 he throws actual temper tantrums about Sirius Black. Like, I feel Snape, deep down is actually super not well adjusted and is an emotionally unstable mess, but he learned to pretend otherwise. Basically, all the cold facade is just that — a facade. He isn't really that stoic.

3. James Potter

I'm weird about James. Like, he's almost a nonentity and what we do hear about him is either negative or comes from biased sources.

I do tend to give him more of the benefit of the doubt than a lot of other fans who prefer canon James do. He was awful when he was younger, he was a bully and he assaulted Snape and there is no excuse for his actions. That being said, I can believe he changed. War changes you and you'd be hard-pressed to find a 21-year-old who isn't ashamed of a lot of what they did or said when they were 15. And yes, some of what James did is definitely more extreme than that of the average person, but it isn't that extreme compared to the environment he grew up in. Remus tells Harry everyone was casting Levicorpous on each other in the halls. I'm not saying any of the bullying is okay, I'm just saying it probably seemed normal to him and this is important context. Same as I don't think Snape is abusive towards students when put in the context of their culture and environment where, until recently, they caned students (Snape actually seems very averse to corporeal punishment. He also likely treats Harry very different than he does literally any other student, but this is the James section).

I just, like the idea of James changing for the better. I'd like to think he did. That life and war and loss taught him something.

4. Peter Pettigrew

Probably an unpopular opinion, but I like Pettigrew more than Lupin. He's awful, he's pathetic, he's a cowardly rat man and I find his sniveling funny. Whenever I try to think of a what-if scenario in my head, Pettigrew is somehow the key to it. Because he's a character that affects so much of the plot in some incredibly crucial moments — he betrayed James and Lily, he resurrected the Dark Lord, and later, he allows Harry's survival. Idk, I just find his situation and just how pathetic he could get fascinating. It's, like, there is no rock bottom for this guy, he keeps digging. Like, you can't get more pathetic than living as a rat for 12 years when you could've moved to Argentina or something.

And at the same time, he clearly has some residual care for Harry for his father's friendship. He has so many opportunities to kill Harry or kidnap him when he runs away to join Voldemort — but he doesn't. Even after Sirius escapes and he knows his time is up, he still leaves Harry alive. When he is supposed to kill him in book 7, he doesn't, he again lets him go and pays with his own life for it. Like, again, idk, it's just how I feel.

5. Remus Lupin

I know I placed Lupin last, and it's because I don't personally like him that much. Pretty sure this is a little controversial, but I don't really like book Lupin, he does not vibe with me, at all. (Though I'd choose book Lupin over Marauders fandom Lupin every time)

Like, it bothers me that he doesn't actually care about Harry (the only one on the list who willingly physically harmed Harry, in a moment of anger, but still). It was Harry who asked to be taught the Patronus, if it was up to Remus, he wouldn't be involved in Harry's life at all. He tried to run on his wife when she got pregnant because he was scared. Like, Petttigrew is given shit for being a cowardly Gryffindor, but, look, you need some guts to betray your friends, so I'd argue Remus is the most cowardly Marauder (it's easy to be brave when you don't care for your own life).

But, all of this is part of his character and the story wouldn't be what it is if Remus bothered to get his head out of his own ass and check up on Harry. How he behaves makes him my personal least favorite Marauder, but I want Lupin to be a cowardly guy who runs away from attachment and responsibility because he doesn't trust himself with anything (especially not anything good). He's not cool, or suave, and he's desperate for people to like him but without actually knowing him because he thinks that if they do they'd run away screaming like he wants to run from himself. Honestly, I don't get why the Mauraders fandom made James the people-pleaser when Remus Lupin is right there always telling people what they want to hear so they'd like him.

Again, these are all my own personal subjective opinions, but yeah.

[saintsenara]

I actually hear "the order of the phoenix is not a gang of child soldiers" a lot, and I agree to some level - especially because I like to use Dorcas and Marlene to explore corners of the wizard world and its timeline that the marauders scooby gang doesn't reach.

But isn't it also true that a lot of resistances and guerrillas through history have been manned mostly by young idealists, often university students and recent graduates?

Young, agile, energetic people to do the work older people don't have the disposition for, and that important people can't do because that would compromise their important positions?

i think there's an interesting quirk when it comes to the order and its demographic make-up which stems from jkr's own politics.

because the order is a resistance organisation, sure... but what it's resisting is revolution. its aims, across canon, are the maintenance of the status quo, with the state and its institutions [including the class system] left broadly untouched, except for the fact of a minor expansion of wizarding society's parameters to accommodate muggleborns [or, at least, muggleborns who also bear the markers of class-based acceptability]. its politics, across canon, are gradualist, liberal, pro-state, and demonstrably unradical.

that is to say, it represents the "adults in the room" - the sensible, rational, intelligent, considerate people who disapprove both of the reactionary, emotionally-led conservatism of fudge et al. and the radicalism of voldemort.

[he literally wants to rip up the principles by which the wizarding world is governed! he wants to tear everything about its social fabric apart!]

and so it makes perfect sense that its members would predominantly be adults - and adults directly involved in the maintenance of the state and its institutions.

whereas the death eaters do conform to the more typical make-up of revolutionary [and/or terrorist] organisations. huge numbers of the death eaters we meet in canon are people who are decades younger than voldemort and who, during the first war, were canonically in their teens or twenties - snape, mulciber, avery, wilkes, evan rosier, bellatrix, lucius malfoy, rodolphus [and presumably rabastan] lestrange, barty crouch jr., regulus black, peter pettigrew, and so on.

many of these death eaters are either stated or implied to be the children of voldemort's school friends and/or the knights of walpurgis, which invites the suggestion that they supersede their fathers in importance once voldemort returns to britain in the later 1960s because their attitudes are much more radical, zealous, and revolutionary, while their fathers want voldemort to take a more traditional political route to achieving his aims.

[which helps explain why voldemort is so furious about half of them claiming to be under the imperius curse in order not to face punishment, allowing them to live according to the social convention they once claimed to want to destroy...]

and voldemort's ability to recruit young, eager men continues during the second war - crabbe, goyle, draco malfoy, stan shunpike, the snatchers, and so on. the order, in contrast, only takes on young members due to the accident of proximity - the weasley children, who become part of it entirely because their parents are involved; fleur, who becomes part of it entirely because of her marriage.

the anti-voldemort resistance organisation which actually attracts young recruits is - despite the fact that harry spends half-blood prince and most of deathly hallows thinking of it as completely irrelevant to voldemort's defeat - dumbledore's army.

[forestdeath1]

I think it's important to see that James and Sirius bullied Snape, but Snape wasn’t "hiding in bushes in SWM to avoid them". Fans of the Marauders also like to whitewash James and Sirius, making them out to be good boys. They were not kind, certainly not to Snape.

Snape also wasn’t a kind and innocent boy. Before school, Snape already held views similar to Nazis, and he wanted to be in Slytherin, a house that "produced" many Death Eaters during a time when Voldemort was tearing the country apart.

I don’t know why Snape stans don’t see how bad this is. Let me repeat. THIS IS VERY BAD. "But we can’t judge them all, they are just children..." No one judges anyone just for being in Slytherin, though it’s a weird desire during an open genocide of Muggle-borns. Again, Snape didn’t just want to be in Slytherin. He held these views before school. (Yes, he had a bad father. No, that’s no excuse to harbour misanthropic views. Sirius had a bad family. Harry had a bad family. Millions have bad families. Snape read books; he knew the history of Slytherin and Gryffindor. Hatred for his father isn’t an excuse to think you're above Muggles. Snape could defend his views even as a child, and he methodically stuck to his views, despite everything Lily told him, despite already knowing what was happening in the Wizarding World).

Plus, the narrative that JKR tried to feed readers in the books, that James was similar to Draco in his bullying, is also bad.

Imagine being in Hufflepuff. I think I'd leave, wouldn't you?

Who wants to be in Slytherin? I think I'd leave, wouldn't you?

It's clear she tried to portray James as similar to Draco.

But they are in completely different positions. Draco is in a house that officially adheres to a policy of exclusivity and pure-blood supremacy, which led to a terrible war and many deaths, literally genocide. Slytherin isn’t just about cunning and ambition. It’s primarily about blood; the main reason for the fallout between Salazar and Gryffindor was that Salazar didn’t think Muggle-borns should be at Hogwarts. Draco is in a house that produced almost all the Death Eaters. Not to mention, Draco is a Death Eater’s son and holds similar views.

At the same time, James, who hates everything about Slytherin, dark magic, roughly speaking, hates their exclusivity and where it leads. And he, as a pure-blood, knows well what is happening in the country at that time. He doesn't fully understand all the propaganda as a child, but he knows it's bad.

There is nothing in common between Draco and James.

In James’s case, it’s actually Snape who holds supremacist views and even persistently advises his friend to be in Slytherin. Of course, James reacts. No "good" person would want to be in the house that supports genocide. At least it's shameful.

Draco actually insulted Hufflepuff from his privileged position. For him, Hufflepuff isn't "prestigious" enough.

James was rude because of the moral component of Slytherin’s ideology (and he was right, though he shouldn't have interfered in Snape and Lily's conversation), while Draco criticised personal qualities of Hufflepuffs, which he finds not "cool" enough. And this is exactly how Snape later insults Gryffindor, calling them stupid.

This is a completely different starting point. However, this doesn't negate the fact that James and Sirius were bullies. James tripped Snape the first time they met. James physically bullied Snape. Sirius bullied him psychologically. Meanwhile, Snape was inventing dark spells, which he planned to use on enemies. Considering he was planning to become a Death Eater, enemies would be Aurors, the Order of the Phoenix, Muggles, and Muggle-borns.

Lily tried more than once to convince him that he was on the wrong path, but Snape was blinded by his ideals. Even his love for Lily didn’t change his beliefs. He thought the genocide wouldn't affect Lily. Snape only realised the full horror when tragedy struck him personally – the only one he always loved. Then he understood how painful it is to lose a loved one. Then he realised that other people also lose loved ones. That all of them are people. And that genocide is bad, and Voldemort is evil.

Snape’s fans blame only James and Sirius, portraying Snape as an innocent victim of rich, pure-blood, popular boys. Ignoring the fact that Snape genuinely believed he was better than the two, and that in Slytherin they couldn’t stand James and Remus, but probably treated Snape quite well, although not enough to defend him (which is not surprising for Slytherins, when did they ever defend each other in canon?). No one was accepted into Voldemort's ranks just like that, Snape was very smart and talented. Voldemort didn't recruit only through fear, intimidation, and humiliation, he gave a sense of community, participation, exclusivity, unity.

James and Sirius are cruel, with Sirius being more cruel than James. James has a "justification" in his mind; Sirius needs no justification, he simply despises Snape. James doesn't understand that even if you think someone is bad, you can't beat and humiliate them. Sirius doesn’t care about this. They don't understand that their violence is bad. None of them fully understand it. All of them think Snape deserved such treatment.

I find it very hard to write this and I'm sincerely trying to be fair to schoolboy Snape and see him first as a child, not a future member of a terrorist organisation, who actively supported these views even at school, though even teenagers are responsible for their actions. But if you find an excuse for Snape, find one for James too. And don't make Snape out to be a little defenceless boy who was a victim and who hid behind bushes. Snape was never a defenceless boy.

I love Snape as a character. But both he and James, and Sirius, were cruel children, but with different presuppositions.

Regarding the notion that poor Snape was bullied by the rich... JKR tried to push a narrative of classism based on money into the story but failed completely, because there is no evidence that pure-blood wizards were directly associated with wealth in the WW. JKR is known for her haphazard world-building, her Ministry even lacks a Department of Economy and Finance, and here she tried to introduce a narrative of Snape's poverty versus the wealth of pure-blood James and Sirius, while the entire book contradicts this narrative. Let me explain! In the books, blood is more important than money. Blood provides connections. And before all social changes connections and blood brought everything else. Although there probably aren’t many rich Slytherins, most are of average wealth. By that point, James was a son of blood traitors and likely not very popular in Slytherin. No amount of money could fix the disdain they had for him because he actively opposed their ideals. A poor but pure-blood Slytherin would consider themselves much higher in status than James (As often happens, the most extreme and exclusive views appear when people start losing their position, and the pure-bloods began to lose their position in the WW). The heir of Slytherin – a status that outweighed poverty and Tom Riddle's half-blood status. For the Lestranges, Rosiers, and Averys, this was enough to follow Tom. They smirked in the book when Tom said he had a "bad background." They knew his real background, his true status. Snape was a Prince, his mother was pure-blood, we don’t know much more about them, but considering Snape called himself the Half-Blood Prince, he was proud of being a Prince, not a Snape. The Gaunts were poor, but they considered themselves the most noble. Classism in the WW isn’t that simple, it’s not just pure-bloods = money or that money solves everything, or money = Upper class. Even in Muggle history, aristocrats weren't homogeneous, there were "real nobles," like in Germany, there was Uradel and those who gained their nobility, Briefadel. The antiquity of a noble line was considered superior to a newly granted honorary title. After all, any commoner can be granted a title, but no power can give noble ancestors to someone not born to them. And this is very relevant to the WW with its shifting social structure, where previously pure-bloods ruled and didn't allow anyone decent jobs etc etc, and now suddenly everything is changing and "Mudbloods" can even become Ministers of Magic.

Slughorn is known for trying to be a "good Slytherin," but he is also the craftiest Slytherin and knows which way the wind blows. The first time around, in his Slug Club, there were only pure-bloods and Tom Riddle himself, but Tom was an exceptional student. But then pure-bloods increasingly lose their status as society becomes more diverse, and he realises that half-bloods can also achieve success. Cunning Slughorn understands that the social structure is starting to change (and this becomes fertile ground for war because pure-bloods don't want to lose their status). And we see that in the Slug Club, there are now half-bloods and pure-bloods, and he selects not just based on pure-blood status but also on talents and who owns a potion shop etc.

So, James has a conditional "status" among "good" houses and within a changing society, but for Slytherin, where Snape studied, James’s status wasn't so clear and his money wasn’t really important for old-fashioned Slytherins. Slytherin lived by its own laws, the laws of true class – Nature's Nobility (Nature's Nobility: A Wizarding Genealogy). Obviously, not everyone was wealthy. In such a small economy, there can't be a large number of wealthy families. While James was popular in school among a more liberal society, Snape fuelled his pride within Slytherin, which accepted him even as a half-blood. And only Sirius had real status for Slytherins, but he lost it. Classism in the WW is complex, because during the Marauders' era, they were in a situation of changing social structure. It's somewhat like the Middle Ages when the middle class emerged, followed by the English Revolution etc. But people reduce it all to the simple cliché of "they had money," although the dynamics between them were more complex, and their story unfolded during serious social upheavals and class struggle.

I know it’s boring 😂 If you have any thoughts, let’s discuss!

[meimeikyu]

me n @mistashowboat have been talking a ton about there being a twitstan community in the aaverse but heres some of my fav random things:

-there are multiple franziska stans (franstans) who have posted pictures of whip marks and/or blurry footage of them getting whipped. once someone else posted a video of franziska whipping someone outside the courtroom and a major franstan acc replied that that was them

-all of the comments on these type of posts r filled with things like "OMG THE QUEEN NOTICED YOU" "WHEN IS IT MY TURN <//3"

-franziska posts updates to her "collection", being a massive list of people she has blocked.

-there are 'slime tutorials' like how musicals have for courtroom cases. there are also live update accs, which usually tend to have one or two ppl attending every case of a specific lawyer n liveblogging them all

-there is a bunch of discourse about slime tutorial vs liveblog followers and which is more "ethically correct" to consume

-there is also a ton of rpf discourse, the regular rpf discourse about writing rpf of the lawyers and a whole other layer about when that rpf involves the actual cases

-there is. so much discourse between prosecutor and defendant stans. you open any one stan blog and at least half their posts will have a stan of the opposition trying to fight them

-there is a major split between the pro wrightworth and anti-wrightworth edgeworth stans, and they constantly get in their own wars

-someone once wrote a phoenix x defendant fic and got witchhunted for it only for it to get revealed that they were the defendant

-franziska and edgeworth both have twitter and regularly publicly bicker

-some person makes a tweet about how miles and fran are totally a couple and gets replied to from BOTH miles and fran. both of them are just going what the fuck.

-maya runs the official Wright and Co. twitter account, it is usally more professional or casual things but she will semi often post silly pictures of phoenix or dumb shit he says

-she has a personal twt as well and is semi well known bcs of her relation with phoenix. she once replied to a public roleplay of her and phoenix with 'I would not fucking say that.'

-Maya also has a nickstan account

-Phoenix is blissfully unaware any of this exists- someone once came up to him and asked for a selfie and he was so confused but agreed and posed very awkwardly like ✌ with them. this person turned out to run a big phoenix stan blog

-there are tumblr gifsets made with courtroom footage

-both maya and edgeworth run steel samurai update accounts that are practically competing with each other. neither of them knows its the other running it

-godot also has a twitter, he uses it exclusively to fight with the wright and co twit

-there is very old footage of phoenix playing elle woods in highschool theater, it eventually gets found and unleashed upon stantwit

-there is an edit replacing all of his objections with the clip of elle saying i object in legally blonde

-there is also an edit using footage of him getting whipped by franziska to whipped into shape

[owl-falls-au-gravity-falls]

Ooooo, wait I just realized that this would mean Stan meets father Titan aka King’s dad.

And just imagine with me, because of the curse, not only does he gain the Titian’s power and form, but gets to keep both cause it gets mixed in with the curse, and so when he reappears like a phoenix, he’s in this fusion form of himself, his curse form and the titan form.

Everyone is of course in shock. But before they can even really register it, Belos attacks again, but Stan summons a shield protecting them, and begins to fight Belos, while telling Collector to take Dipper, Mabel, and Ford as far away from here.

Luz, Eda, and King quickly join him.

Meanwhile Collector takes Dipper, Mabel, and Ford back to his palace, to help out the others in freeing everyone, while he holds the palace up. (Let’s agree that Stan and Luz had taught them all about how to make the right glyphs/ combinations, whilst they were still in Gravity Falls) and so everyone gets free a lot faster. So by the time they free everyone and get back, the fight with Belos is over.

The fight with Belos gets intense, they free Raine, they get back to fighting Belos, with it ending with both Stan and Luz pulling Belos off of the heart.

The just like originally, Eda, King, and Raine stomp off what’s left of Belos, though of course, with there being 3 extra people helping, the Hex squad were able to free everyone, and took Ford, Mabel, and Dipper back to where the fight had been happening. And so they also get the chance to stomp off Belos, especially Mabel, Dipper, and Ford, for killing their grunkle/brother.

Once that’s over with, they do get to reunite with Stan properly, with Ford crying hysterically, and apologizing so much while hugging him.

IN ENGLISH

You are absolutely right!

My idea for Stan to vanish into fire and ashes came from this post.

In this publication, an attempt is made to define what Stan's symbol means.

And since Stan has always been associated with fire, as well as phoenixes, he would rise from the ashes as a new person, someone complete...

I'd like to dig deeper into Stan's interaction with King's father.

After dying, Stan appears in the Intermediate Realm, descending once again, there, Stan would think that he should have told the children that he loves them.

Then someone pulls it out and it's none other than King's dad.

English:Stan: What...? King?

Titan: no, but I got the charm

Stan: … oh… Titan…

Titan: oh, I…

Stan: … you… are… are you King’s father?

Titan: King said it best, “I’m king and queen, the best of both worlds,” although “dad” works for me… I’m your fan, by the way - he points to a hat, once he’s on, with a crescent-shaped symbol and a small circle next to it -

Stan: oh, ah… thanks… I think… wait… if you’re here… does that mean I’m… dead?

Titan: not quite, your body was destroyed thanks to Belos, but it’s still possible for you to come back…

Stan: - relieved to know that - that’s great! … But… what is this place?

Titan: Welcome to the space in between! It's actually among many other things... this is a bridge that connects to all worlds...

Stan: you... you were the voice I heard when I tried to create the portal...

Titan: that's right... I must say that I'm very impressed... no human had achieved as many things as you... your family will be proud of you...

Stan: I'm not so sure...

Titan: don't underestimate yourself... taking care of those children, learning the glyphs, helping Eda and my son, coexisting with your curse, beating Bill at his own game, facing Belos, even when you doubted yourself...

Stan: w-well, when you put it like that, it does sound incredible... but... it's not much use if I can't protect them all... now I'm here...

Titan: it's true...

Stan: and... even so, I made many mistakes... I don't think I can help my family if I keep making mistakes...

Titan: ... all your life you've thought that you're someone replaceable, that you're not important and that no one I would miss you… life has treated you like garbage… but you never let that stop you… you accomplished amazing things… and you are capable of more than you imagine…

The squares around them showed memories of Stan and some of his exploits, how he discovered how to do glyph magic, how he managed to calm the beast from its own curse, how he tricked Bill into a truce between the two of them and how he saved the children countless times, even when he created the portals with little information and the moment he saved the collector

Titan: Your path may have started in a painful way… but for 40 years, you changed, you grew, you matured and you became stronger… you sacrificed yourself, not for the common good, but for the love of your loved ones… now they need you back…

Stan: … I don't stand a chance against Belos… it was easy before, but now… I can't…

Titan: mmh… well…

As everything around him shakes violently, Stan looks at his chest The Titan fills with something green

Titan: I don't have much time left... but you can still stop him...

Stan: How?! I'm not a witch or a wizard, I'm not like the "chosen ones" from the books of Light. I don't even know who I am!

Titan: Then you'll have to find out for yourself... I'll give you the power to stop Belos... but only if you accept it

The Titan extends his hand, a glow comes out of it and the four basic glyphs that Stan learned are drawn

Stan: I-I... I don't know... What if I fail?

Titan: ... listen carefully... you are Stanley Pines, from the human realm, one of the most powerful wizards of the boiling islands and warrior of peace... you have the power of your curse, you are the reincarnation of one of the most dangerous entities in the multiverse and you are undoubtedly someone with a good heart... the question is... Do you choose yourself, "chosen one"?

Stan hesitates, but knowing that his family needs him, and knowing that there are no other options, he decides to accept

As he shakes hands with the Titan's hand, he feels the magic entering his body

Titan: Belos is about to be able to control everything, so you must be quick…

Stan: I…

Titan: Unlike magic in humans, you have more power on your own, so my magic should last more than enough, just don't use it lightly and remember not to let Bill control you

Stan: Wait, what about King?! Don't you want to tell him something?

Titan: …

The Titan whispers something to Stan

Stan: Yeah, he'll definitely love it… but… What do you mean I'm a reincarnation?

Titan: What I mentioned about you being a reincarnation should be able to help you, once you come back, you won't be just Stan anymore, you'll be a new person and that person will be you, you, Bill and Lupin will be one…

Stan: What? But-

Stan is stunned to see that the titan has returned to its original form

Titan: Goodbye, “chosen one”… just kidding… goodbye, Stanley Pines…

And so, the titan sank into those strange black waters of the intermediate space

And Stan would return, no longer as a human with two demons co-existing in his mind, but as a different person…

And as the titan sinks, Stan hears a voice that slowly becomes familiar to him... AXOLOTL...

Well done, Stanley...

EN ESPAÑOL

¡Tienes toda la razón!

Mi idea de que Stan se desvanezca entre fuego y cenizas salió de esta publicación

en ella se intenta definir que significa el simbolo de Stan

Y ya que Stan siempre estuvo asociado al fuego, así como los fénix, renaceria de las cenizas como una nueva persona, alguien completo...

Me gustaría indagar más sobre la interacción de Stan con el padre de King

Después de haber muerto, Stan aparece en el Reino intermedio, descendiendo una vez más, ahí, Stan pensaría en que debió decirle a los niños que los ama

Entonces, alguien lo saca y es nada menos que el papá de King

Stan: ¿Que...? ¿King?

Titan: no, pero se mi heredó el encanto

Stan: … oh… Titan…

Titan: oh, yo…

Stan: … ¿tu… eres… eres el padre de King?

Titan: King lo dijo mejor, “Soy rey y reina, lo mejor de ambas cosas”, aunque “papá” funciona para mi… soy tu fan, por cierto - señala un sombrero, un vez que tiene puesto, con el símbolo de una especie de medialuna y un pequeño círculo al lado -

Stan: oh, ah… gracias… creo… espera … si tú estás aquí… eso significa que yo estoy… muerto?

Titan: no del todo, tu cuerpo se destruyó gracias a Belos, pero aún es posible que regreses…

Stan: - aliviado de saber eso - ¡que bien! … Pero… ¿Qué es este lugar?

Titan: ¡Bienvenido al espacio intermedio! En realidad está entre muchas otras cosas… este es un puente que se conecta con todos los mundos…

Stan: tu… tu eras la voz que escuchaba cuando intentaba crear el portal…

Titan: así es… debo decir que estoy muy impresionado… ningún humano había logrado tantas cosas como tú… tu familia estará orgullosa de ti…

Stan: no estoy tan seguro…

Titán: no te subestimes… cuidar de esos niños, aprender los glifos, ayudar a Eda y a mi hijo, coexistir con tu maldición, ganarle en su propio juego a Bill, enfrentar a Belos, incluso cuando dudabas de ti mismo…

Stan: b-bueno, cuando lo pones así, si suena algo increíble… pero… no sirve de mucho si no puedo protegerlos a todos… ahora estoy aqui…

Titan: es cierto…

Stan: y… aun así, cometí muchos errores… no creo que pueda ayudar a mi familia si sigo cometiendo errores…

Titan: … toda tu vida has pensado que eres alguien reemplazable, que no eres importante y que nadie te extrañaria… la vida te ha tratado como basura… pero nunca dejaste que eso te detenga… lograste cosas impresionantes… y eres capaz de mas de lo que imaginas…

Los cuadrados alrededor de ellos mostraron recuerdos de Stan y algunas de sus hazañas, como descubrió a hacer magia de glifos, como logro calmar a la bestia de su propia maldición, como engaño a Bill para que ellos dos llegaran a una tregua y como salvó a los niños incontables veces, incluso cuando creo los portales con poca información y el momento en que Salvo al coleccionista

Titan: puede que tu camino iniciará de una forma dolorosa… pero durante 40 años, fuiste cambiando, creciste, maduraste y te volviste mas fuerte… te sacrificaste, no por el bien común, sino por amor a tus seres queridos… ahora ellos te necesitan de vuelta…

Stan: … no tengo ninguna oportunidad contra Belos… antes era fácil, pero ahora… no puedo…

Titan: mmh… bueno…

Mientras todo alrededor se sacude violentamente, Stan mira que el pecho del Titán se llena de algo verde

Titan: no me queda mucho tiempo… pero aun puedes detenerlo…

Stan: ¡¿Cómo?! No soy una bruja o un hechicero, no soy como los “elegidos” de los libros de Luz ¡Ni siquiera se quien soy!

Titan: entonces tendrás que averiguarlo tu… te daré el poder para detener a Belos… pero solo si lo aceptas

El titán extiende su mano, de ella sale un brillo y se dibujan los cuatro glifos básicos que Stan aprendió

Stan: y-yo… No lo sé… ¿Y si fracaso?

Titan: … escucha bien… tu eres Stanley Pines, proveniente del reino humano, uno de los hechiceros más poderosos de las islas hirvientes y guerrero de la paz…tienes el poder de tu maldición, eres la reencarnación de uno de los entes más peligrosos del multiverso y sin duda eres alguien de buen corazón… la pregunta es… ¿Te eliges a ti mismo, “elegido”?

Stan duda, pero sabiendo que su familia lo necesita, y sabiendo quenp hay más opciones, decide aceptar

Cuando estrecha su mano con la mano del Titan, siente la magia entrando en su cuerpo

Titan: Belos esta por poder controlar todo, así que debes ser rápido…

Stan: yo…

Titan: a diferencia de la magia en humanos, tú tienes más poder por tu cuenta, así que mi magia deberá durar más que suficiente, solo no lo uses a la ligera y recuerda no dejar que Bill te controlé

Stan: espera, pero ¡¿que pasa con King?! ¿No quieres decirle algo?

Titan: …

El titán le susurra algo a Stan

Stan: si, en definitiva le encantará… pero… ¿A que te refieres con que soy una reencarnación?

Titán: lo que mencioné sobre que eres una reencarnación debería poder ayudarte, una vez que vuelvas, ya no serás solo Stan, serás una nueva persona y esa persona serás tú, tu, Bill y Lupin serán uno solo…

Stan: ¿Que? Pero-

Stan se queda anonadado al ver que el titán volvió a tener su forma original

Titan: adiós, “elegido”… es broma… adiós, Stanley Pines…

Y así, el titan se hundió en esas extrañas aguas negras del espacio intermedio

Y Stan volvería, ya no como un humano con dos demonios co-existiendo en su mente, sino como una persona diferente…

Y mientras el titán se hunde, Stan escucha una voz que poco a poco se vuelve familiar para el... AXOLOTL...

Bien hecho, Stanley...

[seeds-and-sins]

Light My Fire - Part Two

Pairing: Ben "Soldier Boy" x F!Reader

Rating: M (Sexual themes, Crude language, Curse words; WARNING!! Mentions of Death/Desire to Die)

Description: Soldier Boy and you don't always get along, but that doesn't mean there isn't something going on. Ben isn't very good at hiding his feelings for you. He isn't good at showing them either.

Part One

"Where the hell is Phoenix?" Soldier Boy finally noticed why there was a gaping hole in the meeting room's atmosphere. With his feet propped up on the edge of the table, he inspected the entirety of his team and found that one member was missing. Stan Edgar straightened with a sigh, an almost performance worthy somberness to his expression as he shrugged.

"Sadly, Phoenix has fallen ill." Soldier Boy gritted his teeth, the anxious energy tripled as he glared around at his team mates, whom were all unable to make eye contact with him.

"Ill?" Soldier Boy spat, "That's impossible. The bitch has an immune system akin to the Berlin Wall."

"That's what we had assumed for many years, but Phoenix is currently bed ridden with a small cold, proving us wrong." Edgar redirected the conversation then, immediately, "She will not be joining us on this mission, but hopefully she will have recovered by the time we get back."

"Bullshit." Ben wasn't falling for it. Phoenix was a goddamned firecracker-You were a firecracker. Although he had never seen it, he was certain that not even the sniffles would keep you from putting on that suit and fighting. Edgar made it seem like it was so normal, nothing to be alarmed over, but Phoenix was in her early fifties and you never got sick. Something wasn't right here. "Has anyone seen her?" He peered around the table, the awkward silence giving him his answer. "Well, that's settled then. Vought sent her on a fuckin' secret mission, and now they're trying to cover it up." He was satisfied with that conclusion, until Edgar cocked his head stoically at him, and said:

"Interesting theory, Soldier Boy, but Phoenix is actually here in the tower right this very moment. Resting. You are welcome to go see for yourself, no secret mission whatsoever." Soldier Boy, as stubborn as he was, went to stand. "I would insist though, that you go find her after the meeting. This is just a small briefing before our trip to Nicaragua." Soldier Boy's jaw tightened and he reluctantly sat back down, kicking his feet back up once more.

For the rest of the meeting, Soldier Boy remained surprisingly quiet, adrift so to speak, attention completely lost to all things around him. Usually, he had a habit of complaining and making quick insults at his teammates, but this time something more intriguing had taken up space in his thoughts. You.

Was he actually worried? He never worried about anything, he was Soldier Boy. But you were not unlike him when it came to your super abilities and the idea that you were sick didn't sit right with him.

Neither of you ever really got along: not having you around for a mission should have made him happy, but it didn't. He appreciated your grit, something that was in short supply these days. He always had appreciated your grit. You were the only idiot on the team stupid enough to call him out and he loved every second of it. You were fierce and compassionate and you were a damn good hero. If anyone asked the right question, he would very openly admit that you were the only other competent little shit in all of Payback-aside from himself, that was. And his countless attempts at getting into your pants? Well, it was sort of a coverup. Because he did like you so much that it almost hurt sometimes not being near you. You turned him down every time, forever and always was your modo, but it didn't put him off in the slightest. He loved it more than he should have.

Not having you around. Impossible. Not happening. He wouldn't allow it. He was the leader of Payback and if he said you were coming, you were coming.

When the meeting finished-small, my ass-he ordered one of the interns to go fetch him a bowl of chicken noodle soup and a bottle of brandy. He chuckled to himself as he watched them sprint away to go complete his order, knowing that if they made him wait any longer than was necessary he would not be pleased.

"You're going to go see her, aren't you?" Crimson Countess popped out from behind him, leaning against the wall beside the meeting room's double doors. Soldier Boy put on his flirtiest expression, propping an arm up beside Countess' head before grinning.

"Why? Are you jealous?" He teased, thinking it would curl those beautiful painted lips of hers. Instead, she rolled her eyes.

"What's the point even?" His eyes narrowed on her.

"What do you mean, sweetcheeks?" He wasn't going to feed any assumptions, if he didn't understand said assumptions to begin with. "You're just being paranoid. You know there is only one girl for me." He winked, caressing her porcelain cheek with the crook of his finger.

"Don't even." She shoved his hand away and he visibly frowned. "You fucked me once and that was it for you. Then you moved on to all these other girls and that's fine. But you don't want to fuck Phoenix, do you?" Her features drawn down in a sullen glare, "You want to be with her." Soldier Boy gulped, cracking his neck and then standing back from his lean on the wall to adjust his vest.

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"Sure, I don't."

"Here!" The breathless intern returned, Soldier Boy faced him with a raised brow.

"What the fuck? That was like five seconds, kid." The intern was bent over, struggling to catch their breath. They held out an open bottle of whiskey and a container of a sloshy, mushy liquid. "Are you shittin' me?" Soldier Boy snatched the container from the intern's hand. "What the fuck is this?"

"My lunch, Sir. Chicken Noodle Soup that my mother made..." He held up the liquor, Soldier Boy winced in disgust at the half empty bottle. "And this, I stole it from the Legend's office." Soldier Boy lifted his chin in thought, his features loosened for a moment and he swayed his head from side to side in consideration.

"Points for effort, fuck nut..." He snatched up the bottle of booze and then lifted his boot, using a small fraction of his strength to tip the intern over to the ground. "But the soup is cold, so you're still pathetic." He shot a look back at a discarded Countess and then carelessly began down the hallway, leaving the Intern groaning and laying flat on the floor.

He had been in Phoenix's penthouse many times, a majority of the time he was uninvited. You had to have your door replaced at least seven times in the past year because he had a penchant for breaking and entering, especially if you weren't alone. He just couldn't help himself. The idea of you being with someone else, when he was more than capable of stopping it, it itched at his skin. He sometimes would stand outside your door for hours, contemplating whether or not to knock. And obviously, why would he knock? He was Soldier Boy. He didn't knock for anyone.

But god, what a stubborn bitch you were...

This time he would knock.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

He heard some shuffling on the other end, a TV being paused, followed by footsteps.

"Yes?" A nasally voice sounded=, he almost couldn't believe that it belonged to you.

"Police. Open up." He smirked, tilting his head as he listened for your response. There was a brief silence, and then:

"Fuck off, Ben."

"Think again, cupcake, I brought you the goods." Another moment of silence, he waited, and then he was done waiting. He dug his shoulder into the edge of the doorframe, his cheek close to it as if he was listening. "God, you must love me breaking down your door."

"Urgh, stop!" You hit the door and he bounced back with a hearty chuckle. "GO. AWAY."

"Do you think that's going to work?" You unlocked the door and swung it open, Soldier Boy instantly recoiled at the sight of you. You were wearing at least three layers of sweatshirts, comically making you look thicker, sweatpants and a pair of fluffy slippers. Your hair was disheveled, dark circles under your eyes, and your skin was sickly looking. His eyebrows furrowed and a certain strictness overtook him.

"What the fuck do you want?"

"Jesus Christ," He hid his concern as quickly as it had dawned on him. "Please tell me you're dying." You slumped into the door, tiredly fluttering your eyes before sniffling.

"You'll be dead in a few seconds if you don't fuck off." There it was, that fire that he loved oh so much.

"Hear me out-"

"I hate hearing you out."

"I know, but this time..." He held up the soup and the bottle. "You might give me a chance."

"Really?" You snorted, crossing your arms as a horrible shiver wracked your body. "This is what you bothered me for."

"Considering that no one else on the team has stopped by, I'd say beggars can't be choosers."

"I didn't beg to be bothered by you, asshole."

"But you thought it, didn't you?" He held the items up again, puckering his lips in an amusing pose. "Come on~" He chirped, "Let me bother you."

"I'll accept the offering, you can leave now." You reached out for them, just to shut him up, except that wasn't enough. He swiped the items back to his chest and feigned an appalled look.

"Oh, please, honey, we're a package deal." You stared at him blankly, before stepping back, about to shut the door. "You close that door, next time I'll break it down." The shift in his tone, from playful to terse, sent a bout of irritation through you. You cracked it back a little, closing your eyes and then with an exhausted exhale, you creaked it open just enough. "Yahtzee." He cheered in a sing song voice, entering your penthouse and then booking it for the couch. You slammed the door and rushed to beat him to it.

"No. Don't you dare. No. No! FUCK!" He splayed himself across the couch, blankets and all, destroying the little nest you had made for yourself. You kicked the edge of the couch, it shifted from your strength and Soldier Boy laughed.

"Ooo, what are we watching?" He sat upright, allowing some space for you to occupy. He placed the bottle and the soup on the coffee table, squinting in thought at the giant Panasonic screen ahead of him. "A porno?" You bonked him on the head as you passed in front of him to curl into the corner of the couch.

"No, dipshit, it's Footloose. VHS." He unlatched his helmet and proceeded to remove it, dropping it alongside the other items on the coffee table.

"Ahhh, who's the guy in that-uh-" He snapped his fingers aggressively, closing in his eyes to scour the farthest reaches of his being. "Steak-Sausage-He's named after some kind of meat, I know it-"

"Bacon..." You couldn't help but laugh. "Kevin Bacon." Soldier Boy smiled boyishly at you, weaving his fingers through his hair and pulling back the bangs that dropped before his eyes.

"Yeah, that Bacon guy. Not bad, I guess. Shitty movie though." You hit his arm with what strength you had.

"Don't fuck this up for me. I've never seen it before."

"Neither have I..." He snorted, "I was too busy getting a blow job in the back row. Ya'know back in my time-"

"Our time." Oh yeah, sometimes he forgot that they were almost the same age. "Back in our time." You shivered again, snatching the blanket that Soldier Boy had pinned to the couch with his ass. He showed you mercy and sat up for you, so that you could bring the fabric up and around your body. His eyes focused on you for a split second before he shook his head away.

"Back in our time, we had good actors. They'd sing and dance and do all sorts of shit. Heck, did I ever tell you about that time I-"

"Ate Audrey Hepburn out in a bathroom stall at the Academy Awards?" You finished dully, Soldier Boy chewed the inside of his cheek.

"What about when I-"

"Fucked Marilyn Monroe in the ass, in the Oval Office?"

"Okay, now-"

"When you jerked off on Lucille Ball?" He clicked his tongue and snapped at you this time:

"You made that last one up."

"Sounds about right though, you mostly only ever contribute your sexual exploits to ninety percent of our conversations, so..." You sniffled, lifting the remote from the end table and shrugging. "Unless you have a legitimate explanation, I don't want to hear it."

"Fuckin' bitch." He muttered under his breath as you pressed play on the remote, rolling the movie. It was silent for a few minutes, nothing but the music and conversation from the big screen, and then you shivered again, your teeth rattling as your body tensed. You cursed under your breath, a wave of annoyance washing over you. "Vogelbaum see you, yet?" Soldier Boy asked, from the corner of your eyes you saw his head tilt toward you. "You don't look so good."

"Why do you care?" You spat at him, shifting to stare in his direction.

"Because you're a member of my team..." You rolled your eyes back to the movie, choosing to ignore what sounded like genuine care in his words. "I mean, if I am allowing you to stay here-"

"Allowing me?" You forced out a boisterous laugh, from the pit of your belly, that slightly hurt. "What are you gonna' do? Force me to go throw myself limply at Marxist Sandanistas?"

"You still got some strength in you, kid. Squeeze my pinky." He followed this by actually holding his pinky out. You rolled your eyes, but proceeded to wrap your pinky around his and squeeze. Strong, but not that strong.

"Ben, I can hardly lift myself up from the ground, it hurts to breath, and this morning I struggled to bring my tea to a steady boil." He flicked his pinky from yours, your hand limply falling to your lap. His eyes scanned you, chest rising and falling with a heavy breath.

"You afraid?"

"No." You confessed, although you continued with, "Heck, the sooner I die, the less I have to look at your ugly mug."

"That's a brat move." He smiled at you, you couldn't help but return it. There was almost an odd way about this moment, as if you were secretly comforting each other, while trying not to comfort each other, while also trying to hate each other. Or at least, this was a much more comfortable moment compared to the usual. "Seriously. Did you get Vogelbaum in here?"

"He came and checked me out, said I was fine."

"That sit right with you?"

"Not, really, but I don't care." You bit your bottom lip, refusing to look at him.

"Why, not?" The music in the background was no longer soothing as it was needling every nerve in Soldier Boy's patience. "(Y/N)?" It was the only warning you were going to get before he destroyed the TV, he decided.

"We don't age." You clicked the button on the remote, the screen zapping into an abyssal black. You propped your head under your fist on the armrest and gazed at Soldier Boy. You hadn't slept for days and your superhuman energy could only run for so long. You were on backup at this point.

"So what..." He crossed his arms, a stern curve to his brow. "I thought woman liked that shit. No wrinkles, or whatever."

"Ben, I'm being serious."

"Me too."

"You're sixty-five years old..."

"Thanks for stating the obvious."

"And you don't look a day over thirty." He breathed, pretending not to understand the implications of what you were suggesting. He knew it already. The both of you did. You weren't the only two heroes that never aged, but it was a given that you didn't age ever and that your kind of hero was few and far between. "I'm fifty-four and look just as young as I did when I was twenty-two, getting that first injection of V."

"What are you even going on about, honey? I think you need some weed, calm ya' down, want me to-"

"Please listen to me for once." Were you crying? Oh boy, Ben thought. He cleared his throat and then sat up taller against the backrest of the couch, directing his eyes to the ceiling. "I don't want to live forever. Time gives life meaning, ya'know? And when you can't feel pain, or you're too strong to give someone normal a really good hug, it starts to get to you." You palmed at your face, willing the tears away. "I want to get married one day, I want to have kids and grow old with someone."

"Pfft, Marriage." Ben mockingly echoed, but he was silenced by your tear stained expression. He had never seen you so broken before.

"I can't believe I'm even talking to you about this..." Your breath wavered with a snicker. "You're the biggest asshole I've ever met. You don't care."

"I've thought about it..." He needed to busy himself with something, so he settled on the whiskey. He tucked in a reach for the bottle, yanking the cork out and going for a chug. The liquid left a pleasant burn behind on his throat and he winced. "Settling down with someone..." He feigned a cough into his fist. "That I care about. That I-" His head tilted back and forth. "That I might even love."

"Countess..." Hearing you say her name made his skin crawl, his fist clenched and he shut his eyes. No. Not Countess, Phoenix. "She loves you."

"She hates me." He plopped back, placing the bottle in between his legs on his crotch. "Only puts up with me because of the money, because of the fame."

"Maybe if you showed some loyalty to her, she wouldn't." His tongue slung around teeth, collecting the residue of the hardy liquid. With his head laid on the puffy pillow of the backrest, he turned it to you.

"I'm a real fuck up, I know it. My father seemed to know it too..." He fiddled with the neck of the bottle. "But I'm still afraid of failing the people I really do care about." You eyed him, not particularly sure what to do with this soft and open moment. "And Countess isn't one of them."

So you push people away.

Your breath hitched, you buried the bottom half of your face under the covers for a brief recoup in your feelings. Your face was still wet and you hate how absolutely freezing it was.

"I don't want you to die..." The admission was heaved out, shaky and choppy and all sort of scrambled, but your entire body tingled at it. "If that wasn't obvious enough." You pulled the blanket over your head, like that was going to help you.

"I don't think it was, Ben. You just told me you wished I was dying, not even a few minutes ago."

"I was joking, come on. Can't take a fuckin' joke?" He yanked at the edge of the blanket, but not hard enough to tug it from you. "What's the problem, anyways? You've got the sniffles, big whoop."

"I'm cold." You lowered the blanket to gaze at him. "I'm never cold."

"Well, you're a naturally hot person. No shame in that." He grinned, winking at you. When you didn't immediately react, as far as he could see-the blanket hiding your smile-he stretched his arm across the couch again. "I know something that can warm you up."

"I'm not going to have sex with you."

"Damn, I like the way you think." He purred, you pretended to gag at him as you settled the blanket in your lap. "But no, just come jump in my furnace for a little bit. I won't touch you." After his offer, he followed with an assertive wave of the hand that was stretch out along the back rest toward you.

"Ben-"

"I've seen you butt naked, get your ass over here." You sighed, knowing he wouldn't take 'no' for an answer, he never did. You weakly shuffled across the couch and when you were close enough he dropped his arm, trapping you in his embrace. Your body melted against his and you were instantly incapacitated at the heat that drew from in thick waves. You couldn't help the moan that exited your parted lips. "Careful, you might just tempt me, honey."

"I'll-" Your eyes slid shut as you dropped your cheek to his chest. "I'll burn your dick off if you try anything." His laughter rumbled up through his chest and you felt it with a fond smile. You wished you could smell too, because you were certain he smelled amazing.

"We going to turn the TV back on, or..."

"Why don't we just..." You smacked your lips, bringing a leg over his thigh so that you perfectly curled up to his side. "Let's just stay here for a bit." He didn't promise not to touch you, his palm held the base of your skull and his other hand guided yours to rest flat on his chest.

"I'm okay with that." He allowed his own eyes to slid shut as he took a deep breath. He tucked his nose into your scalp and inhaled, you were too sleepy to stop him. "If you aren't better by the time I get back, I'm going to toss you off the top of the tower."

"Why would you do that?" You snorted, confused more than annoyed by it. You knew how he could be.

"Call it, Soldier Boy's in-home flight training experience." You smiled goofily, thankful that he couldn't see it.

"Oh yeah? Well, if I'm going down, you're going down with me."

"You won't go down though..." There was a lilt of a growl to his words. "Because you'll be brand new by then, right?"

"I hope." You didn't expect him to squeeze you even tighter.

"You will. Promise." You turned your face, your lips to his chest plate as you then looked up into his eyes.

"I promise." He wanted to kiss you so badly then, but he couldn't. He couldn't kiss you. He thought about your conversation, about how you both opened up to each other. He thought about what his father said to him all those years ago... And he didn't want to hurt you. Instead, he cupped your cheek and stared back.

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