#I used to have this gc named that
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pee pee bridgers
pee pee bridgers
#Pee Pee Bridgers#I used to have this gc named that#to this day it's still named that#they all questioned my choice#because i don't know#i think it's a good name
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coelacanter + socials
#amy mentioned that devyn's mullet was like someone chewed on it and the troll doll imagery would not leave me#infamous#infamous if#marlow locke#coelacanter#kaced#fake social media#i dont want to HEAR how out of touch i am i dont use instagram or twitter i had to guess at syntax/usernames#also the cropping for the group photo ended up so strangely with the instagram post format i ended up going with so i just#worked it into the comments section. same with iris' outfit i realized way too late she should've had something fancier </3#i thought rowan would be the type to point out something like that. he'd have a choice instagram with pictures cropped and edited perfectly#iris posts a photo of her and devyn and he'll comment 'very cute. were you asleep when picking this filter though or..?'#also i know this is funny to genuinely no one else but i briefly debated having maya make the fan name “the canners”#as if the band name was “can't-er” not “canter”#(they're just 'fishies') but i wanted to incorporate it somehow hence the gc name and that one fan's username#coelacanter? no. we coelacan... ner <3
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i think it's about time that we acknowledge that, no, that character would Not change their name in a groupchat! especially not to that. and, no, that character would not change everyone else's names! especially not to that.
#my drafts are back up to almost 800 sooooo have this post i made a couple weeks ago!!!#it irks me SO MUCH#most people just use their names or nicknames😭#i'm sorry but i.ida would not make his name 'sonic' and j.irou/m.omo would not include 'lesbian' in their names even if they are#c.huuya would not make his name about his height (god we get it the short jokes are so annoying to me personally it just feels like#a way to infantilize him) and d.azai would not make his name about bandages and lord knows k.unikida is NOt changing his name at all#most people don't make their names their sexuality i just. don't understand why almost all chat fics include like. 'lesbian queen' which#like ig if it's someone using it to come out or for pride month that checks but most of the time the characters i see with their sexuality#in their name are characters tHAT WOULD NEVER DO THAT!!! at least use characters who would😭 like j.irou's too shy and m.omo is too reserved#and like sorry not sorry but d.enki and s.ero and m.ina are not going to just instantly change everyone's chat names - most people don't ge#into a chat and go 'imma change everyone's names' and like i could deal with it if they gave them names that made sense#bUT THEY DON'T!!! also so many anime chatfic writers give them american type names like reference american artists#it's just like. they prolly don't listen to as much american music as you think they do. japan has musicians too. like. they're not america#sorry i genuinely love the concept of chatfics and think they're a FANTASTIC way to analyze character and i even did a whole lesson on#characterization in texting last semester! it was really fun too like the kids enjoyed it! but like. most characters won't text the way you#do. and people just. always make them type the way they do. or use actual convos from griupchats but don't make it fit the characters#just. mmmmmmmmm.#idk why but gc fic names bother me So Much lol#AM DONE NOW SORRY GUYS#corey talks:)
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the 39 clues girlies are having a field day in the notes of a post I made months ago and all I can do is gaze upon them fondly as I remember the most passionate late lover of my life
#they want to revive the fandom 🥹#oh the stories i could tell#jesus my t39c hyperfixation was definitely a Time. i don't think I've had a more intense hyperfixation ever#i can STILL name all the clues off the top of my head. five years later#i feel like a grandma#i don't get as sad over it or as excited every time i see a sign of someone wanting to revive the fandom as i used to but#your first love never dies and all#throwback to that time i tried to organise an internet clue hunt!!! we should totally do that on tumblr it could be so fun#i had so many ideas damn#the 39 clues#liveblogging.pdf#holy shit wait it's more like 7 years now. not five#broooooo#almost 8 tbh#i miss the site i miss the ffn forums i miss the books being in stores...#i miss the gc that made me get a tumblr in the firstplace#oof#i do not play about this series when i say i am INSUFFERABLE about it#i literally used to think about it 24/7 for years not exaggerating#i had to relate everything to it i still do#i was fully convinced i was an undercover lucian agent#who am I kidding i still do#i don't have one notebook without all the clues listed in them from some time i was bored in class
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get yourself a friend who will listen to you go on an hour-long mad rant about some possible linguistic inconsistency in the worldbuilding of your latest brainrot that has literally zero bearing on that one throwaway line you're writing and overthinking, and who will not only listen but have an absolute blast (affectionately) laughing at you being an absolute goddamn nerd even though only very roughly knowing what you're even talking about. but also if someone could tell me whether Eru is a Quenya/Sindarin/Adûnaic word, if it would have made it into common westron and the Hobbits casual vocabulary, and if it would have theoretically existed before the invention of (Elvish) languages or whether it would have been a different name / no name because technically there was no language. that would be great. like. i know 'Eru Ilúvatar' is somewhat common but Ilúvatar is clearly marked as Quenya whereas Eru seems to have contradicting sources and also yk predates. the creation of elvish languages in the narrative so. anyway
#*mine#mona rambles#real time adhd diagnosis happening in the gc tbh#i didn't solve it i just edited it out of the fic to avoid it being possibly inconsistent#would anyone but me have questioned it? most likely not#but what can you do#mia tag#<33#also i think i did somewhat solve it in the sense of that i figured out there are contradictory accounts depending on where you look#but yk it's not a satisfying answer in the sense of 'would bilbo baggins know and use the name of Eru and if so where did it came from in#Westron. which is entirely inconsequential but well. the adhd
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ok happy wip wmonday this is mostly rune factory ft. one (1) romijuli. most of these did not escape the sketch phase (and the two that did... did not get far, as pictured) but they're all things i had intent to complete at some point.
commentary is below the cut if anyone is curious about my thoughts on anything i've drawn here
for piece commentary..... well first off i also had a shara/sofia sketch that got corrupted bc sai loves doing that at random and it's part of why i want to move away from using it :-( second off
(drops to my knees) PLEASEP PLEASE PLEASE.... CONSIDER PIA/RAVEN..... PLEEEEEEEASE oh the things i could say about those two regarding their own isolation / alienation due to being nonhuman and how despite the fact they've both found a place for themselves they still feel Othered and Lonely at the core. i think they could work on that together once raven gets out of her shell a little bit. the meeting of sea and sky. fire and water. please understand. (the one w raven in bird form is actually even based on the caelum et ocean story set from love nikki bc it made me think of them LOL)
dolce/forte is also like... please consider them. there's something really funny about the knight who's afraid of ghosts and the ghost whisperer. but i also think they have really compatible personalities and forte's generally headstrong nature could go well with dolce's quieter way of doing things. i think dolce would find flustering her funny. but not in like... a harassing way. just in a way where she knows how to make her blush a little bit. i like them
romijuli..... well you see (i open my mouth and begin screaming) (i do not stop screaming) (if you listen closely enough you can detect a garbled string of sounds that loosely translates to 'READ PERFORMANCE')
for the 5 doodles.... priscilla ended up being my favourite rf5 girl to my immense surprise LOL so i developed a habit of sketching her a lot in 2022. fat priscilla. please understand. reblog. i also really liked priscilla/lucy at first bc they're like... obvious, and while my interest in them waned for various reasons (one being a lamentation that they'd become The One Femslash Pairing^tm of the game where people don't really consider anything else bc they have that one...) i still like that doodle.
and lastly. ray and alicia r my favourite sibling steup in all of rf and i think they're both transgender. i hope this helps. (idk solidly what direction i see ray as trans in but whatever the case. ray is not cis to me. love and light)
#rune factory#rune factory 3#rune factory 4#rune factory 5#doodles#im not tagging romijuli origin series. read performance (2018)#i remember that rmjl because i had it open during an art party i had w my rp gc and someone.#idr who. asked me about the file name. which was 'i think i hauve covid.sai'#i also have a pia icon i never finished but i do actually want to finish that so im not putting it in here#ill share it when its done bc im DETERMINED to not let that one rot#bc like. you know. i want to use it.#btw i mentioned shara/sofia in the commentary but did not elaborate. i will elaborate here#so my idea behind that one is rly just that shara is a really kind and sincere / forthright individual. i think she'd work hard t-#- understand sofia's speech patterns and the meanings behind them and not treat her as odd because of it by any means#and i think sofia would really appreciate that.
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my friend's newest bf has become the first one he's had so far to join our group of friends which is very slay and cool but going to be horribly awkward if they break up i fear
#.txt#he's been added to the gc now it's over#i keep hanging out with just the two of them but it doesn't even feel like i'm third wheeling bc it was us first dammit#if anything the bf's third wheeling Us#anyways do any of y'all have silly group chat names#ours used to be '2010 avengers rebellion' but now it's just 'parklife' after the blur song bc we quote it constantly
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gijinka of my stuffed toys in an attempt to give more of a shit about them
#mine.art#stuffed toys#pearl#crayon#more to come if i have the energy for it#lol i didnt even name any of them and had to rush them out for this#pearl is an optimistic realist whos kinda stupid#shes actually pretty grounded but her antics wont tell you that lol#like girl can and will build a portal to another world knowing full well it doesnt exist#her fav activity is ghost hunting#she doesnt believe in ghosts btw#shes a cis lesbian and is as gc as a fisherman can get#crayon is a happy-go-lucky pessimist bordering on cynic#it likes to go along with pearls antics and manipulating other ppl into also going along with pearls antics#its p smart but usually only uses it to get freebies and to scam ppl#its a transman non-sam ace#pearl Insists shes the older twin to crayons dismay#pearl has uneven pupils cause the shark i based her on also has uneven pupils#crayon is thiccer cause i accidentally drew it thiccer and decided to just go along with it#ik pearls colors screams bi but my heart decided on lesbian so here we are
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i hope i die, you broke my heart
#personal#so fucking tired oh my god#just yelled at my sister so loud that my throat is sore over a piece of fuciing plastic#sometimes ecerytbinf feels so bad and its like. what do i even do#like ok i relapse and i need a break from someone and they loose their fucking shit on me#taljing about how you always deal with my shit and youre tired of how i see you as the worst in the group#as if i didnt literally repeat to you over and over again that i love you and that i always will even when you kept denying it#all of the times youve left all the servers and the gc and all that and i was there to comfort you#theres a reason im always the person you go to#byt yeah . im neverrrr there for you#like is it just that im not there for you in the Same Way that youre there forme ??#does it need to be completely equal to be fair#and idk. i know hes struggling too but its so fucking stupid because ive been struggling for months and i dont treat u like tjat#im tired of feeling like i have to do two times more than everyone else ro be worthy of their love#like sorry man but im fucking sick and tired#i know ill be fine without you but like youre so sick right now that i dont know what youll do without all of us#idk im just like. you used to be so kind but now youre writing your name in mu blood#and sometimes i feel bad because i didnt mean evedytbinf i said to you but lets be honest#you didnt mean everyrbinf you said either#and i dont know if you were ever the right person because a lot of the time i think we are just two chemicals that werent meant to mix#but ill always remember you when i hear that one song and im making it sound like this is some kind if goodbye but it Really isnt#but like there was a time when i would tear myself apart for you. mot even because i liked you that much#i guess i just wanted someone that liked me as much as you did???#and when j say that it isnt even about one soecific oerson. its an amalgamation of ecery person tgat has ever loved me#a little more than they were supposed to#i think i hate ahen people love me Too Much because i dont want to be adored like that it scares me#iknow what thats like and i dont want to be someone fp Its so scary#okay if im being honest i dont know whbat the fuck im saying right mow#byt like. idk. im tired and i think im done. tbh#💭
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I may be stupid.
Okay so I accidentally forgot to cancel my Scribd free subscription, got charged, realized that there were audiobooks there and decided to leave it because apparently I can still read books if I am listening to them.
Not the point.
The point is I had a pdf I wanted to read. It's not long (like 40 pages) but as previously established my brain hates reading nowdays if it's not a fanfic.
I was agonizing about this for like a week now and brain still doesn't let me read more than like a paragraph or two at a time.
Then I realized.
I have a text to speech on my phone. From that time I had no time to finish a DND book and desperately downloaded one to read it for me while I was cooking.
And in my mind that app was for that and only for that.
Up until today when I got enlightened and realized that hey it is a text to speech. Fucking put said text in there.
I am so happy I could fucking cry.
I am also stupid.
#random reblogs#(also additional fun stuff: i put my own stupidity into the gc with my bffs#and promptly got a demand for the apps name because they need it too. so now there are three of us gushing about this at 1 am)#thank you my own stupidity#reading#also thanks to text to speech you are helping to manage my adhd bullshit brain with your bad AI voices you have on the free plan#it's just... fuck this helps a lot
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I think recognizing you're friends emoji patterns is a beautiful thing
#got a notif from the gc and it was an emoji#the notif as it shows up at the top of the screen shows the gc name and what the message was i have to pull down to see who sent it#anyway#i saw the emoji reaction and idk what came over me but i felt it in my very soul who tf sent that shit#of couse we all use emoji but i know who sends that gd face the most in the mf#i was like 'that was ___ wasn't it?' AND I PULLED DOWN AND IT FUCKEN WAS😭😭😭😭#anyway me and my friends pass around one single braincell on rotation like we pass around the blunt#kay just saying shit
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Wasn't there a game where the goal was to do as much car damage as possible? GameCube/PS2 era. I need it.
I want to kill.
#salad-txt#Hmmm hope it's GC have that emulator set up#Hmmm looks like only Burnout 2 works then#*puts it on tonight's list*#Looking at the names almost sure my brother used to hae 3 tho#I never got into PS2 much and now the only games I want are on steam
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keep saying i don't want 2 work another retail xmas but canNOT 4 the life of me make myself finish my goddamn fucking job applications !!!!!! death & dying & despair etc. etc.
#i dont dislike the application process for gc jobs on principle BUT#it does not mesh well w/ my difficulties re: starting & finishing tasks#but like i understand why u cant just send in a resume n hit done#NOT that there are many IT listings up atm...... and ill apply 4 clerical/admin stuff too#but an IT-1 STARTS a good $10k a year higher than a CR-5 soooooo :///#which is whatever its fine money isnt everything!! ill gladly make less if it means not hating my job!!!#but i also wanna. u know. LIVE. move out of my parents house. buy brand name snacks occasionally. maybe -gasp- go on a vacation#(not 2 say i dont make an attempt at travel now but thats with very finite savings that are def only going down not up)#also extremely frustrating 2 me the emphasis put on having a degree that completely locks me out of certain job categories#like. yes. there are for sure some where having the bg knowledge is important eg. an AU (auditor/accountant) or MA (methodologist)#and there are certain skills a degree (in theory) provides eg critical thinking research etc.#but not all of us have $40k+ to get tge fancy piece of paper saying we have those things. and u can have those skills w/o a degree#and smth like an EC which needs a degree in economics sociology or statistics is so arbitrary#and maybe not necessarily actually based in the majority of work done by the majority of positions in that category#ANYWAYS not me being bitter abt education standards YET AGAIN lol#idek if i could go to uni even if i could afford it. even tho i have 2 college diplomas id probably have 2 redo my grade 12 english 😶🌫️#also if money were no object id probably go for like. film studies or smth lol not sociology#tho. ngl. if i had the willpower and determination 4 smth so rigorous (i 100% dont) accounting does seem. interesting asdffhkkfdghh#ANYWAYS pt. 2 all this 2 say this is why i instead spent $10k+ on the only possible 2 yr diploma#that can still get u in2 the higher paying public service jobs. even tho ive discovered i Dont Particularly Care for programming. :(#thats an understatement actually i was actively in hell for like 80% of that program and the remaining 20% mostly wasnt coding
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#this tweet was extremely funny nightmare-ifies#anyway i have a lot of funny screenshots from that week actually#one of the gc live reacting to seeing he was about to donthe controversy stream#one of us begging him to stop tweeting and making things worse#one of my gc of irl friends breaking down the situation and also saying i was going to become the joker which i think it funny bc you can#see the gc name was 'geeble'#several of the dash when dream dropped the knf kiss#/th
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What the fuck do you mean ppl I don't like can still perceive me and my relationships
#I'm REALLY weird abt keeping certain aspects of my life separate from each other#I have two separate names I use for what I deem my personal or professional life and I DESPISE the crossover#I'm secretly a very private person (which is a very funny statement)#I told that to my friend and she was like wow I couldn't figure that out from the way you don't tell anyone your last name or your age or#your birth year or have any social media or talk about your past school#and I was like SHUT UP???#anyways something abt this is driving me up the wall#bunny speaks#bunny vents#this is all over a meme someone sent in a gc LMAO
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i’m still shaking
#/vent post#this week has given me more emotional whiplash than the rest of the year combined#being told to ‘use my brain’ to being told I'm a ‘core member’ at work to being called a fucker in gc#to going back to my parents place for the first time in about 3 years and them NOT yelling at me and instead being Most Chill#not berating me for being opinionated and not being perfect and instead giving me some Interesting Info#not intentionally messing up name and pronouns and asking for help instead#and then SMOKING WITH ME AFTER THATS WHAT THEY HAD THEATENED HOMELESSNESS OVER BEFORE#then coming back to my place and having a coworker threaten workplace violence#then finally being intimate after being touch adverse for a month and then touch starved for two weeks#still mad about the flashbacks and getting triggered about shit#but yk it is what it is bc u said u don't care so ig it must not matter#u barely ever ask about me so how would you even know what my past looks like?#but ugh it's whatever i forgot 🙄
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