#I think this might actually be a level of tone deaf I haven’t seen before this point

[nyaagolor]

Yall are not going to fucking believe what I just found on YouTube

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

idk how many people would even want to see this BUT i wanna yell about Leela and Brax so here's a list of all their scenes togethr/scenes pertainng to them that i can recall (pLEASE add on if i missed anything/ you have any additional thoughts!! i could talk about these two all day!)

right off the bat in Weapon of Choice when Leela is on the outskirts of the Citadel and Brax goes to bring her back (which is interesting in and of itself, bc usually i would imagine a chancellery guard would go do that so what made Brax decide to instead??), Leela kinda goes off at him bc she's hurting and instead of trying to actually explain what's going on Brax doesn't even try to argue he just says "we need you" which is great bc Leela has that instinctive desire to be needed and to help people and he's speaking right to that -- also as far as we know, this is Leela and Brax's first actual meeting in canon? it's implied that they know of each other, which makes sense, but it doesn't seem like they've ever directly interacted before: Brax seems almost slightly uncertain, and Leela is combative, but when he's gentle with her she's actually quite receptive

the literal next scene after that, where the OT4 is all in one room for the first time (they still kinda hate each other at this point but still !!!). Narvin explaining Gryben and being a real jerk about it and Leela (understandibly!) questions if Gryben is a prison world, and Brax (who to this point has been mostly quiet as Narvin and Romana brief Leela) jumps in to both clarify Narvin's previous xenophobic statements while also maintaining the inherent questionable/negative connotations

(btw it's actually pretty important to note that Romana self-edits herself a lot when talking to Leela, especially in the earlier seasons; you can actually hear her revising the things she says to put it in terms that she thinks Leela will better understand. and i mean she does it out of genuine consideration for her friend associate but it often comes across as varying levels of patronizing. Narvin also obviously "dumbs things down" when dealing with Leela early on, but like... Brax never does that on any level. the only difference i can tell in how he addresses Leela vs how he talks to anybody else is that he seems much more kind with her than almost anyone else???)

their conversation about the Matrix in The Inquiry: this is REALLY important (and if you've ever talked to me on ao3 i've probably gone off to you about it lol) because it's layered. they're talking about the Matrix but they're also not because in answering Leela's question Brax is making a very thinly veiled allegory (which he outright states a minute later) to Time Lord society/politicians/most importantly HIMSELF -- he's actually strangely open about his morals/beliefs in this scene and i'm living for it tbh -- and i find it very interesting that even though he does directly explain what he means ("how do you know all this?" / "because i am a politician.") he also leaves it for Leela to work out the implications. like it's a very nuanced conversation bc there's double meaning in it and most people on Gallifrey seem to think that Leela is tone-deaf and can't pick up on that stuff (even Romana sometimes oversimplifies things to her) but Brax totally just lets her take from it what she will bc he believes her intelligent enough to understand. he doesn't think her any lesser because she's human.

ALSO on a secondary note to the above: the fact that Leela has a question/needed clarification (sorry, haven't listened to this in a while i forget how it actually happened) and actively sought out Brax to talk to about it?? like she knows Romana better she could have gone to her but i feel like Leela kinda imprinted on Brax and someone she can go to for help if she needs it; maybe it's partly bc she knows he's under marginally less pressure than Romana is but also the truth of the matter is that Brax was the most genuinely helpful person to her in the previous stories and that probably means a lot to her (esp. bc he acts like the essence of everything she hates about Gallifrey but he doesn't treat her the way she would expect from that). btw this topic is gonna come up again in a hot minute

that part where Brax gives her that information that might help her re: the Andred thing, even though he really probably shouldn't have done that -- it kinda makes me think about what he must have been like with Theta tbh???

actually this is mostly my own conjecture but there's some neat stuff in Spirit bc during the *waves hand vaguely* bodyswap dream sequence thing, Romana is very "!!!! Brax can help us !!!" which is tecnically Leela brain talking, so like there's the implications of the stuff i've said above about Leela having this idea of Brax where she knows he's someone she can go to for help

can u tell i'm soft for them

Leela sounding really sad/distracted when she talks about how Brax isn't there YES i'm grasping at straws but a lot of this relationship really is conveyed through the voice acting bc of how little direct focus there is on the characters. there's actually several scenes in Mindbomb where she mentions him and she outright says that she misses him during her discussion with Matthias

that implied scene with them in Mindbomb!! i have a Lot of thoughts about that!!! it's all conjecture and fanfic fodder!!! but the reason i mention this is because it seems pretty meta that out of the whole Gally Gang, it's Leela who first sees Brax when he comes back to Gallifrey and in turn she's the first person (besides Matthias, i guess) that he sees upon his return?? idk i just feel like that's somehow a meaningful detail??? also her reaction of utter shock after spending the entire episode missing him and how worked up she is when she tries to tell Romana, like I desperately need to know what happened in this missing scene MR RICHARDS PLEASE TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED

Leela insisting on going with Brax when Pandora starts hurting him and their whole conversation there is just. so good. like they're both just so soft and then when Darkel comes in Leela instantly goes into protective mode. like they just have such an open relationship bc Brax doesn't even try to be all pretentious with her, like he doesn't even try to keep up any facades when he's with her he's just very genuine and it really says a lot about both of them -- Leela is so good at seeing people, like getting down to the core of who people are and what makes them them (which is why she's good for Romana, btw, bc Romana has a lot of identity issues) and Brax is so tangled up in who he presents himself as that he barely knows who he actually is anymore but Leela can see that and she makes it so he can truly be himself and he doesn't have to hide. also she's so gentle with him when they talk about Pandora, she's very caring and empathetic and wants to make sure he's okay and i am WEAK

it's been a hot while since i listened to Panacea but I think i remember Brax being really soft with Leela when he first brings the gang to the Axis, like just sounding really glad to see her

ok other than the fact that Brax is lowkey relatable in Reborn (daydreaming fanfic about yourself/people you know? simping for Mary Tamm Romana? yeah mood, my man) there's that scene where they're first appraoching the Citadel on the alt!Gallifrey and it seems like none of them, and Brax specifically, have seen it from the outside in a good long while bc he's very in awe and he tells Leela that he wishes she could see it and he sounds sO hEcKiNg sOFT oh my word-

and once again with Leela thinking of Brax as someone she trusts for help: in Dissassembled when everything is going to crap she straight-up says that she wants to go find Brax bc he'll know what to do/be able to help

at the beginning of Annihilation when Romana is depressed and questioning if Brax truly was her friend and Leela INSTANTLY, NO HESITATION assures her that he was; i lost where i had her exact lines written down but she actually kinda goes off to make sure Romana gets the point

literally forcing myself to talk about this bc it makes my brain stall out but like,,, the Brax Hound in Annihilation,,, Leela being like "goodbye, Braxiatel... again" she sounds so sad and like UGH i always kinda forget how sad it actually is for them to lose Brax in Dissassembled bc like, it was so sudden and they didn't get to say goodbye and Leela is always losing people and i have many many feels about this scene and how all that emotion is made very clear in how they each respond to the Hound (might make a separate post abt this later if anyone is interested ::eyes::)

Enemy Lines is utter bullcrap about these two and I will never stop being salty about how they not only sidelined the very good, very subtle friendship they had in s1-4, but they??? made Leela acutally not trust Brax??? when literally this entire time she's been the one person who probably genuinely trusts him the most?? what the heck, David

I haven't heard TW3 or 4 yet but i'm assuming there's nothing worthwhile in those with regards to this duo (correct me if i'm wrong tho lol, i would love to be mistaken in this assumption)

TL;DR Leela and Brax mututally imprinted on each other and have probably the most open and healthy relationship within the OT4 and it is an absolute CRIME that nobody besides Gary Russell and Justin Richards cared enough to actually build on it in canon

[vagabondreamer]

After the Fall (2)

Pairing: Lucifer x Angel! Fem! MC

Word Count: 2k

Series Summary: Angel! Fem! MC is part of an exchange program that sends her to the Devildom for a year.

Chapter Summary: MC attends her first day of classes at RAD! She encounters familiar faces and new ones - some friendlier than others.

CW: Mentions of drugs, Mentions of sexual assault, language, blood

Author's Note: Thank you so much for the support! I love reading your comments!

***

You stepped out of his office, slowly turning back to your normal form. You walked up the stairs, back into your own room. Closing the door behind you, you locked it, and face planted on your bed. You were upset and hurt, maybe even a little afraid; no one had ever insulted you before, and you weren’t prepared to see Lucifer in his demon form. Rolling over, you wiped away the tears that you didn’t even realize were falling.

“Pathetic.” Not sure if you were talking about yourself or him. Closing your eyes, you just hoped to fall asleep but the sound of your door opening caused your eyes to flutter back open.

“MC, Lucifer forgot to give you your DDD this morning,” Mammon said, handing over the phone to you.

“Now I get why they want me to knock,” you muttered to yourself.

“Hey - were you cryin’?” He sits on the bed.

“What?! No!” You look down at your phone, playing with it to avoid eye contact.

“Why are ya eyes red?”

“Uh,” you think of an excuse. “Obviously, getting high.” You smack your own forehead in response - not only were you a liar but a horribly bad one at that. What kind of angel gets high?

Mammon just laughs at your stupid response.

“Okay sure, next time share with me,” he jokes. It makes you feel a little better. “Oh, dinner is gonna be ready soon.”

“I’m not hungry.” In reality, you just didn’t want to see Lucifer.

“You sure? Beel will eat everything. There won’t be a second chance.”

“I’m sure, thanks.” Mammon got up and left your room.

You decided you’d rather shower and go to bed. Tomorrow was Monday, and according to Lucifer, your first day at RAD.

***

Back home, you woke up to the gentle sunrise and songs of angels. Here, you woke up to loud banging at the door.

“MC hurry up, we’re gonna be late!” Mammon’s voice could be heard over the banging.

You groaned in response, and threw the covers off of your body. Quickly, you did your routine and put on your uniform, and headed downstairs to the kitchen. Mammon stopped you, and turned you around towards the front door.

“Wait! I haven’t eaten yet!”

“Next time set an alarm, c’mon, we’re gonna be late!”

You were going to starve to death here.

Mammon practically dragged you all the way to school; the other brothers must’ve left a lot earlier. Your first class was history, and you shared it with Mammon and Beel. Barely missing the late bell, you slid into a desk right next to Beel.

“Hey MC.”

“Hey Beel.”

The professor started talking, and that was your cue to shut up. Everyone else was quiet, and your stomach decided it wanted to be heard. A loud growl erupted, and you grabbed your stomach, silently begging for it to be quiet. Beel nudged a protein bar to you.

“Don’t worry, it happens to me all the time.” You smiled and accepted the bar - eating it cheerfully.

Feeling someone stare at you, you turned to see Mammon looking at you curiously. Did you have something on your face? Your eyebrow rose, questioning his look. He just shook his head and turned his attention back to the front - how strange.

The class passed quicker now that you weren’t focused on food. The bell signaled the end of class and you got up, looking at your schedule - potions was your next class. You waved a small goodbye to the two boys and wandered the halls looking for the room; you could’ve asked them for help, but you were a self-sufficient angel, after all. The halls started to get less crowded and the warning bell went off.

“Oh, geez.” You rushed to the end of the hall and luckily found the right room. The only desk open was next to Satan and some guy with whitish silver hair; quickly, you sat down in between them.

“Hey Satan,” you whispered.

“Hey.” You turned to the boy next to you and smiled. His aura felt different than everyone else’s, he wasn’t a demon nor an angel, so he must’ve been the human Lord Diavolo was talking about!

“You must be MC.” He stated rather than questioned.

“Yeah, and you’re Solomon?” He nodded in response. “How did you get picked for the program?”

“I assume it’s because I’m the greatest sorcerer alive.” Oh, he’s cocky.

“Really?”

“More like the shadiest sorcerer,” Satan chimed in.

“Oh, you two know each other?” You ask.

“Hardly, he has a pact with Asmo and is always summoning him away.”

“Awh, Satan, if you want to see me so badly all you have to do is ask,” Solomon teases.

“I would never form a pact with you.”

“Never say never.”

“You three back there, after school detention!” The professor announces. You had been so engrossed in the conversation, you completely forgot you were in the middle of lecture.

***

The last class of the day was coming to a close. Thankfully you shared it with Simeon and Luke. You didn’t want to get in trouble again, so you kept the conversation to a minimum.

“Luke, how are you enjoying the Devildom?”

“I’m not! It’s unbelievable that we have to go to class with a bunch of demons!” You smiled sympathetically. He had a good point, you all were surrounded by demons - and it went against everything you had been taught. But, you decided to lighten the mood.

“Yeah I understand, but some of them aren’t too bad!” You recall how kind Beel and Asmo have been - even Mammon, who kept doing his own thing, wasn’t that bad.

“That’s right, you just have to keep an open mind,” Simeon added. Luke crossed his arms and just kept quiet. The final bell went off, meaning class was over. You were happy to be going home, but suddenly remembered you received detention with Satan and Solomon. Your shoulders immediately slumped over.

“You alright, MC?” Simeon asked.

“Yes, I just have to go talk to my potions professor.” You didn’t tell him the complete truth, maybe it was because you didn’t want him to be disappointed in you, or for him to report back to Michael - yeah, it was definitely the latter.

Waving goodbye to Simeon and Luke, you walk back to potions class. The professor is sitting at his desk awaiting your arrival. You sit at the seat directly in front of him, and look around, no one else is in the classroom.

“Where’s Satan and Solomon?”

“They both had valid excuses for not being here.”

“Wait, what -”

“You’ll sit there silently for an hour. Any noise and I will add thirty minutes.” His tone is cold and uncaring. You couldn’t believe those two ditched you! Crossing your arms, you held back any remarks or unwanted noises and waited the hour out. After about thirty minutes the professor let out a sigh and started packing his things. You took this as a sign he was letting you out early for good behavior.

“Oh, hah, my mistake. I have to go, but you still have about thirty minutes. You’ll be a good little angel and wait it out right?” He was most definitely mocking you. You just nodded your head in agreement, and he left. You waited about five minutes to make sure he was gone before you grabbed your bag and went out to the hall. It was empty. You headed towards the front doors, but felt a tap on your shoulder before you could make it outside. Turning around, you see three unfamiliar boys.

“Can I help you?” You ask unsure of their intentions.

“Actually, I think you can,” the tallest boy says. “We’re part of a club, and our equipment just won’t work.” The other boys nod their heads.

“Oh, I don’t know anything about technology.”

“Do you think you could look at it? We’ve all tried, and we really need to get our activities started.” They seemed sincere enough, but you were still hesitant - they were demons. But, what if they really needed help? And you deny them because of their species? That would be wrong on so many levels.

“Okay, yeah, where is it?”

“In our club room, come on!” They lead you to a classroom, there’s no one else in there, but you do see a camera on a desk.

“So, is this what’s broken?” You turn around to see that the three boys had transformed into their demon forms. You back away slowly. “What’s going on?”

“Awh, come on, sweetheart. Everything’s going to be just fine.” The tall boy comes closer, entrapping you between him and a wall. “We just need a video.”

“V-Video?” One of the other boys picks up the camera and points it towards you. Your body is frozen in place. Why weren’t you transforming? Tears pricked your eyes.

“Can you blame us? We’ve never seen an angel before.” His fingers slowly caress your face; you notice his sharp claws. “So, beautiful.”

“Please stop,” you say with authority, but it’s met with deaf ears.

“Hold her down,” he tells the third boy. You're pushed further against the wall, your wrists held over your head.

“No!” You cried out as you squirm trying to get free. The tall boy goes to rip your shirt open, but one of your hands slips free, you punch him square in the jaw.

“You bitch,” he shouts as he slaps your face. His claws dug into your left cheek, leaving three deep cuts. You fall onto the ground and try to crawl away.

“Pathetic,” the boys laughed. The boy kicks you in the side, it sends you flying into some desks; a sharp pain erupts in your ribs. He grabs your hair and makes you look up at him. “Sweetheart, I’m going to get what I want; how badly you get hurt is up to you.”

Your face is stained with tears and blood, and your body is aching. These boys were lower level demons, and yet they had asserted dominance over you like it was nothing. Why did Michael never train you in combat? Why were you being so useless? As if God himself heard your prayers, a familiar face passes by the door. You muster up all your might and call out his name.

“Lucifer!”

The boy holding your head up immediately let go and straightened up. His blood must’ve chilled at the sound of that name.

“Shit!” He walked to the door and looked out the small window - no one. He opened it, and as if he appeared out of nowhere, he was face to face with Lucifer. You made eye contact with him, but you looked away - ashamed at how you were found. Without hesitation, Lucifer grabbed the boy’s head and rammed it into the door - knocking him out. The other two immediately began begging for mercy, but found none. Lucifer didn’t break a sweat as he kicked their asses, pushing them to the brink of death. He grabbed the camera off the floor and removed the SD card, crushing it in his fist.

Calmly, he walked over to you - you were still crouched on the floor, paralyzed with fear. Gently, he scooped you in his arms and carried you home.

The walk to the house was silent; minus, your sniffling. He didn’t speak a word, and that worried you. He walked up the steps, and into the house, carrying you directly to his room and into his bathroom. Setting you on the countertop, he dug through the cabinets and pulled out a first aid kit. He cleaned and dressed up your wounds to his best ability - your face would be harder to cover so he disinfected it and left it alone. Lucifer finally gazed into your eyes; his stare was so intense it was hard to gaze back without looking away.

“MC. Are you okay?” You pondered on his words. No, no you were not okay.

“Yes.”

“Are you sure?”

“Of course, I would never lie.” Tears spilled out of your eyes, it stung your face.

“MC...I need to believe you’ll be okay.” He went to wipe away some tears but you flinched. His hand retracted instantly. “I have to report this to Lord Diavolo.”

“Lord Diavolo? So, that’s why you’re asking if I’m okay?” You scoffed. “I’m perfectly fine.” Pushing him away, you jump off the countertop and head out of his room.

“Wait, MC.”

“What now, Lucifer?” You were exhausted and just wanted to be in the safety of your blankets.

“Why didn’t you transform?”

[kazuyumi1412]

Me two days ago: “I’m really glad that I finally finished that idea that I had! Now, about those other ideas…”

Me today: “…”

Me today: *URGE TO MAKE FOLLOW-UP INTENSIFIES*

Seriously, though, ever since I made the end of my little “Not All Heroes Wear Capes” fanfic post (In @gilby-the-geek-girl ‘s words, “a fanfic of a fanfic”.), I’ve been wanting to make the rest of that little storyline! I was wondering what would’ve happened after Virgil went into hiding, along with how everything gets resolved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hero in Hiding

[Vanishing Act]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“It’s cold as hell in here…”

Virgil muttered to himself as he made his way throughout the house, hearing the echoing voices of his housemates wandering around. Even though it’d been a few hours since he’d initially shrank, they were still looking for him relentlessly. Well, he couldn’t say that they weren’t dedicated, but the reason that they’d spend so much time trying to find the person that nearly brought the house down eluded him.

As for Virgil himself? Well, aside from being cold, he kept thinking about how it must have felt for the others to live with him, especially when his voice started to act up. The voice that caused that whole mess…

What was going on with his voice anyway? It didn’t sound like the large, booming voice that came with his flare-ups normally. It sounded exactly the opposite. Small. Quiet.

Weak.

No, there wasn’t any time to think about that. All he had to worry about at that point was keeping himself in the walls and making sure that nobody heard him. Well, that and make sure that he wouldn’t freeze to death. Damn, it was cold being that small.

“HAVE EITHER OF YOU SEEN VIRGIL?” he could hear Logan asking the other two.

“NOT EVEN A HAIR ON HIS PURPLE HEAD,” Patton replied.

“ACTUALLY, IT’S FUCHSIA,” Roman corrected him. “STILL, WHAT IN THE WORLD HAPPENED? ONE SECOND, HE WAS ONLY A LITTLE TALLER THAN PATTON, AND THE NEXT, HE DISAPPEARED!”

Virgil covered his ears when Roman got louder. If he was the one that changed sizes instead of him, he was pretty sure that they’d all be deaf by that point. Then again, he had the (not exactly supernatural) superpower that was being able to tame the beast that was Virgil’s anxiety, so that had to count somewhat.

“IT’S CERTAINLY STRANGE,” Logan remarked. “WE’VE NEVER SEEN THIS SIDE OF HIS POWERS BEFORE. AND FROM HIS REACTION, NEITHER HAS HE.”

“AGH!” Roman groaned out of frustration. “IT’S BEEN THREE HOURS, AND WE STILL HAVEN’T FOUND HIM! HE COULD’VE SLIPPED OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR ALL THAT WE KNOW!”

“FALSEHOOD. WHILE THAT’S ENTIRELY POSSIBLE, YOU’RE NOT FACTORING IN WHAT’S OUTSIDE THE HOUSE.” — Virgil imagined that Logan was listing off the next items off using his fingers to count — “IT’S RAINING OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW, SO HE COULD BE WASHED AWAY. OTHER ANIMALS COULD CONSIDER HIM AS THEIR NEXT MEAL AS WELL. AND IT’D BE FREEZING FOR SOMEONE AT THE SIZE THAT HE’S AT, WHATEVER THAT HAPPENS TO BE RIGHT NOW. ESSENTIALLY, THAT’S THE ABSOLUTE LAST PLACE THAT HE’D WANT TO BE.”

“SO HE CAN’T BE ANYWHERE EXCEPT IN THE HOUSE?”

“UNLESS YOU WANT TO INCLUDE THE EQUALLY BAD IDEA OF GOING INTO THE PIPES.”

“WELL, I’M SURE THAT HE’S AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE,” Patton reassured them. “I CAN FEEL IT.”

“SPEAKING OF FEELING,” Roman noted, “IS IT JUST ME, OR WAS THERE SOMETHING DIFFERENT ABOUT THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING EMO? ASIDE FROM THE SHRINKING PART.”

‘Thinking that the person that almost brought the house down is incredible?’ Virgil thought. ‘He must’ve hit his head harder than I thought.’

“HE DEFINITELY SEEMED SLIGHTLY MORE VOLATILE THIS TIME AROUND, THOUGH I’D IMAGINE THAT IT WAS MAINLY DUE TO HIS HIGH STRESS LEVELS,” Logan stated.

“I GET THAT MUCH,” Roman remarked. “I MEAN WHY HE STOPPED WHEN HE SAW ME BLEEDING.”

“I THINK…WELL…” Patton said with a tinge of uncertainty, “I MIGHT BE WRONG, SINCE EVERYTHING WAS ALL JUMBLED, BUT–”

“JUST TELL US WHAT IT IS!” Virgil could tell by Roman’s tone that he was getting desperate.

“I THINK VIRGIL FELT GUILTY. FOR ALL OF IT.”

Right as he heard those words, Virgil almost instantly remembered what happened to cause the incident.

__________

Virgil tried to calm down as best as he could, staring straight at his hands as he rested on the couch. He would’ve gone back to his room at that point normally, but recently, he’d felt more anxious than normal being there. As for why, he couldn’t put a definite finger on it. Was it about school? His dwindling antidepressants? Something else he couldn’t think of? He had no idea.

“You alright there, Not Sleeping Beauty?” he heard Roman ask him. Apparently, even without looking directly at him and even with all of the eyeshadow he had on, Roman could still see the dark circles under Virgil’s eyes. “You look like you haven’t slept in days.”

“I’m fine, Princey,” Virgil muttered a reply.

“Fine?” Roman knew about his dislike of that word, so hearing Virgil use it definitely threw up some red flags.

“Yes, fine.” — his tone sounded almost like a growl — “Now, can you leave me alone? I’m trying to think.”

“You know that going without your beauty sleep isn’t good.”

“I said that I’m fine, Roman.”

“Hey, I’m just worried about you, Snow Fright. That’s all. Your grades are going to dip if you don’t get your sleep.”

Something in Virgil snapped when he heard that. He stood up, not noticing the change in his height or voice as he glared at Roman. “I said that I’m FINE!”

The massive reverb shockwave shook the house, knocking everyone off their feet and shaking things loose, even cracking the ceiling.

Oh boy…

__________

Virgil fled towards a different part of the house once he remembered that, not wanting to be reminded of the giant mistake that he’d made a few hours prior.

When he was satisfied with how far he went, Virgil sat down to rest, being rather winded. Who knew walking across the house at that size could be so exhausting? Either way, he wondered how the other three would act the next morning. Would they still be looking for him? What about cleaning up the damage that he’d caused? He remembered back to when Roman lifted him up that one time and he tried to get back at him, only for Logan to yell at both of them to go outside. Guess it was because he didn’t want Virgil accidentally wrecking the room that they were in. What would he think of him now that he actually wrecked one of the rooms? Virgil’s thoughts were cut short as he heard a door open and shut through the wall behind him.

“HOW IN THE WORLD ARE WE GOING TO CLEAN THIS UP?” he heard Logan mutter to himself. He guessed that he’d wandered to where Logan’s room was. “THE CEILING IS DEFINITELY GOING TO NEED TO BE REPAIRED. WHAT WAS VIRGIL THINKING?”

“Glad to see the human calculator likes me,” Virgil said to himself, his words oozing sarcasm.

He thought that Logan would continue going on about the damage, but was surprised to hear the next words coming out of his mouth. “IT WAS JUST AN ACCIDENT. HE KNOWS IT JUST AS WELL AS WE DO. SO WHY WOULD HE HIDE FROM US LIKE THIS? IT’S JUST SO…ILLOGICAL…” He heard the chair to Logan’s desk being pulled out. “WHY ARE YOU HIDING, VIRGIL?”

Did he know? No, he couldn’t know. His senses were keen, but not enough to hear Virgil’s extremely quiet voice. Or were they? Virgil didn’t want to risk it, dashing off to another part of the house just in case Logan could hear his voice.

As he continued wandering through the walls, he heard what seemed to be Patton talking to himself. Virgil really didn’t want to risk almost getting noticed again, but then again, Patton’s hearing wasn’t as sensitive as Logan’s. Either way, Virgil’s curiosity got the better of him, and he quietly approached the side of the wall and listened in on Patton’s one-man conversation.

“EVERYTHING’S GOING TO BE ALRIGHT,” Patton muttered to himself. “WE’LL FIND HIM EVENTUALLY. WE HAVE TO.” — he sniffled a bit, and Virgil could only imagine that he was fighting back a few tears — “HEY, I SAID THAT EVERYTHING’S GOING TO BE ALRIGHT. CRYING’S NOT GOING TO DO ANYBODY ANY GOOD RIGHT NOW.”

Virgil’s heart broke a bit inside when he heard that. For all the time that he knew Patton, he knew that he didn’t like showing that he was crying at anything other than a scene in a movie. Holding back his less-than-awesome feelings when it came to other people. To hear him fighting back tears was…

Well, he really didn’t have any words to describe it.

If Patton was that worried about him, then he could only imagine how Roman felt about Virgil’s disappearance. He was always a drama queen regardless, even though he technically identified as male.

“Can’t these guys go one night worrying about themselves for a change?” Virgil said to himself, making his way through the house’s walls. “They got hurt because of me…”

He heard his stomach growl, with the sound echoing a bit in the hollow walls. Swearing to himself a bit, he decided to change course and head towards the kitchen, going to get himself something to snack on.

Slipping out of the wall for a bit, Virgil looked around, trying to find something out in the open that he could take. After all, he couldn’t open the fridge, and the cabinets were too high for him to reach. Being that small had a lot of disadvantages, didn’t it?

“LET’S GO IN THE GARDEN…”

Virgil quickly hid, hearing Roman’s voice coming in his direction.

“YOU’LL FIND SOMETHING WAITING…”

His voice. Something seemed off with it.

“RIGHT THERE WHERE YOU LEFT IT, LYING UPSIDE DOWN…”

It wasn’t his usual soft voice. Not the reassuring one that Virgil knew.

“WHEN YOU FINALLY FIND IT, YOU’LL SEE HOW IT’S FADED…”

What was it? What was different about his voice this time around?

“THE UNDERSIDE IS LIGHTER WHEN YOU TURN IT AROUND…”

Virgil peeked out from his hiding spot, seeing Roman sitting on the couch. He couldn’t make out his face from that distance, but even just by his slouched posture, he could tell that Roman was not his usual happy self.

“EVERYTHING STAYS RIGHT WHERE YOU LEFT IT…”

What was he hearing in Roman’s voice?

“EVERYTHING STAY, BUT IT STILL CHANGES…”

Exhaustion?

“EVER SO SLIGHTLY…”

Frustration?

“DAILY AND NIGHTLY…”

A hint of a solemn tone?

“IN LITTLE WAYS…”

Roman completely stopped, letting out a sigh. Virgil quietly got closer to him, making sure to stay hidden by using cover. He saw Roman resting his head in his hands, though he couldn’t tell what face he was making.

“BUT NOTHING REMAINS…”

Woah. Okay, Roman changing the lyrics? Virgil knew that something was wrong at that point. Maybe he was feeling all the things that he thought he was feeling. Then again, he couldn’t know for certain. He wasn’t an empath like Patton, nor was he a telepath like Remus. Whatever “-path” he was, it wasn’t either of those two. Either way, he hid underneath one of the chairs, recognizing that it was the exact same one that he’d been hiding under when he initially shrank, and looked up at Roman.

“THAT IDIOT BETTER KNOW WHAT HE’S DOING, HIDING FROM US LIKE THIS,” Roman said to himself. “MAKING US WORRY ABOUT HIM. HE’S PRACTICALLY GIVING US HIS LEVELS OF ANXIETY!”

“Liar...” Virgil muttered. “You’d all be better off if I wasn’t around.”

“I HIGHLY DOUBT THAT,” he heard Logan’s voice remark.

Virgil froze up, wanting to turn around before he felt himself being lifted up. He quickly shut his eyes as tightly as he could as he braced himself. It felt like Virgil’s heart was beating a mile a minute.

“PUT HIM DOWN!” Patton exclaimed. “YOU’RE SCARING HIM!”

Virgil felt himself being gently set down on some surface, though he couldn’t tell what it was with his eyes closed. As he slowly peeked to see where he was, he saw Roman, Patton, and Logan all staring back at him, all having various degrees of concern on their faces.

And just when he thought that things couldn’t get worse...

“ARE YOU OKAY?!” Patton quickly asked, looking at Virgil’s tiny form. “YOU’RE NOT HURT, ARE YOU?”

He quickly covered his ears upon hearing Patton’s loud voice. “You’re about to burst my eardrums if you’re not careful,” Virgil replied.

Patton let out a sigh of relief alongside Roman, though Logan seemed rather unphased. At least, on the outside.

“REGARDLESS,” Logan said, keeping his voice down, “I’D LIKE TO KNOW WHAT YOU MEANT BY ‘YOU’D ALL BE BETTER OFF IF I WASN’T AROUND.’.”

“You heard that, huh?” Virgil remarked, already knowing the answer.

“YOUR VOICE ISN’T THAT QUIET.”

Virgil let out a sigh, knowing that he couldn’t keep quiet about it, otherwise the other three would get at him nonstop. “Well, you saw what happened earlier. I’m practically a ticking time bomb. I was just thinking…” — he took a deep breath to calm his nerves — “I was thinking that…maybe you’d all be better off without me. I just wanted to see what it was like for a day.”

“AND I ASSUME THAT YOUR INITIAL HYPOTHESIS WAS WRONG?”

“Not all of it. I finally know how you feel when my voice acts up.”

“ANYWAY, CAN YOU TURN BACK TO NORMAL?” Roman quickly asked. “WE CAN’T HAVE YOU STUCK AT YOUR ‘PINT-SIZED’ SETTING, C-3MO.”

He crossed his arms a bit. “You know he can’t change his size like I can, right?”

“I KNOW! I’M JUST RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS! MY BRAIN’S FRIED BECAUSE OF HOW MUCH WE’VE BEEN WORRYING ABOUT YOU!”

Virgil reflexively covered his ears again as he heard Roman yell. To be honest, he wasn’t at all used to having to cover his ears every time one of the other three tried to speak. Either way, he was a bit curious himself, and he tried to get back to his normal size. Unfortunately, he wasn’t really able to get much of his height back, so Virgil was pretty much stuck as the shortest person in the house for the rest of the night.

“I’M SURE THAT YOU’LL BE BACK TO YOUR ORIGINAL SELF IN THE MORNING, VIRGIL,” Logan stated. “NOW, IF YOU DON’T MIND, IT’S LATE, AND WE ALL SHOULD BE GETTING TO SLEEP.”

“SEE YOU IN THE MORNING, KIDDO,” Patton said as he carefully patted Virgil’s back.

The other two left, leaving Roman and Virgil alone in the room. It was a bit awkward to have such a height difference between them at first, but then again, it was essentially the reverse of what usually happened.

“SO, I GUESS I’M TAKING YOU BACK TO YOUR ROOM, UM…VIRGIL,” Roman said as he held out his hand, having run out of new nicknames for Virgil.

“Hold on,” He told Roman. “I…” — Roman motioned for him to go on, hearing him out — “You mind if I sleep with you tonight? My room’s not the best for helping my anxiety go down.”

He smirked a bit. “IS THAT JUST AN EXCUSE TO GET IN BED WITH ME?” — Virgil got a bit flustered, and Roman chuckled — “I’M JUST KIDDING. C’MON.”

He carefully picked Virgil up in his arms and carried him over to his room. It wasn’t exactly his usual fireman carry, but still, Virgil wasn’t exactly his usual self at the time, so a bride carry had to do. After setting him down, Roman went to “quickly” change into his pajamas, leaving Virgil sitting on his bed. He glanced off to the side, seeing a familiar green gingham dress and off-white apron on the plush next to him.

“And here, I never thought that we’d see eye-to-eye,” Virgil muttered, a slight laugh escaping from his lips, probably from the absurdity of the situation. They were practically the same size at that point.

Eventually, Roman returned, having changed into some sweatpants and an old t-shirt, and carefully clambered into bed. Taking both Virgil and Mrs. Fluffy Bottom in his arms, he laid down on his back. With the utmost amount of care, he flipped the hood on Virgil’s jacket up, covering his head.

“GOOD NIGHT, YOU TINY THUNDERSTORM,” Roman said before drifting off to sleep.

Virgil could feel Roman’s heart beating as he laid on top of his chest, looking over to the plush rabbit accompanying him. He smiled as he shut his eyes, feeling the warmth comforting him.

Even if his powers seemed like a curse sometimes, he had to admit that there were some blessings in disguise hidden within them.

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf

Ok, so I’ve tried and tried several times to get this posted, we’ll see if this is the time it goes through. Half the reason why this review series has slowed down is not just the multitude of real life stuff I have to deal with, but also Tumblr just refusing to work with me and deleting my posts. I also can’t save my work else where due to Tumblr messing up the formatting. It’s been a frustrating mess and so far no one @staff​ has come up with a tech solution or work around. 

Summary: Rapunzel helps to rebuild Old Corona, (after its near destruction from the Black Rocks) which will become the permanent home of Red and Angry, who have returned to Corona to settle down. However, she begins to notice strange footprints around the area, as well as the livestock becoming more unruly and fearful. The group comes across a monster hunter named Creighton, who explains to the group that the area is being stalked by a werewolf, who possessed one of Corona's citizens. Aiming to save this person rather than kill them, Rapunzel sets out to find who it is. 

When Was This Decided?

No seriously, when was this decided? It’s a pretty big leap go from ‘the rocks makes various towns inhabitable’ to ‘let’s rebuild!’ What’s changed here? Cause the rocks haven’t been removed and Rapunzel failed in her mission to nullify their power. In fact the rocks were not only reawaken in the second season finale but shown to be under the power of someone who’s intentions were made unclear to the heroes.

So I ask again; who thought this was safe thing to do now? What provisions have been made to accommodate the rocks? They blocked the well, remember, and destroyed the fields; how are the people getting food and water? 

And most importantly why wasn’t the audience informed beforehand? When you change up the status quo in a story you need to provide just cause to the viewers. I legit thought I had accidently skipped an episode when I first watched because this plot point was not set up properly.  

Why Were They Ever Left Alone to Begin With?

In a story where neglect is a central theme and motivating factor for all the main characters, it is super tone deaf to have those same characters perpetuating neglect themselves. The decision to live on their own should not be left up to Angry and Red because they are children. Children are not mature enough to provide for themselves neither emotionally nor physically and when placed in situations where they have to do so it psychologically damages them. Which the series already showcased with Varian so why is this suddenly deemed ok? 

This Completely Undermines the Past Two Seasons

The entire conflict of the past two seasons was the rocks forcing people out of their homes. Eugene was made an orphan from them, Varian lost his entire support group because them, they drove out the Saporians from their encampment which prompted them to invade Corona, and Rapunzel and company spent an entire year on the road trying to find a way to stop them from spreading supposedly. 

All of that has now been flushed down the drain with this decision. And its super insulting to watch because it’s the writers telling us that we’ve wasted our time caring about this plot for two years. You don’t resolve major conflicts off screen and without explanation; it’s lazy!  

Also Where Is Varian and Quirin During All This?

This is not only their home and legal charge, but it’s also the ending to their ongoing story, and they’re not even here in a silent cameo. 

Wouldn’t Quirin be overseeing the rebuilding of his town? Wouldn’t Varian be using his skills to find workable engineering solutions for them, fulling his season one goal of saving his home and making his village better with his inventions? Also wouldn’t Edmund want to catch up with his brother and help out now that he’s here? 

In fact not a single person who actually lives in Old Corona is to be found in these opening shots. 

Oh, But We Do Get Earl

Earl might be from Old Corona, or he might not be. We’ve literally never seen him before. The artists had to create a brand new character model for this character, the writers had to write new lines for him, and the casting director had to hire an actor and have him record these lines for only less than a minute of screen time, never to be seen again. Even though they legit had shepherd models already to go from season one that they could have used. It’s a waste of resources and a prime example of the mismanagement going on in this show. 

It’s Too Late In the Series to Waste Time On a New One Off Villain

Speaking of a waste, Creighton might have more story reasons to appear in this episode than Earl does but her inclusion is still a poor decision. The show already has an overabundance of villains, so many in fact that they shipped the bulk of them off in season two, and this is the final season; the season where we should be wrapping up plots and minor characters stories not kicking off new ones.

Taken on her own Creighton isn’t a bad character presa, she works for the episode, but when we could have gotten a resolution to Caine’s, Hector’s, or the Disciples’ story arcs instead it highlights how misused the series assets are. 

All This Lore Will Be Forgotten In Just a Few Episodes Time

We finally get like some magical rules and backstory only for future episodes to ignore it from here on afterwards. Red can turn into a werewolf whenever she pleases, night or day, with little explanation as for why.  

Just Arrest Her Rapunzel

You’re the acting queen. You have the power and the right to arrest or even merely detain someone who is threating your citizens and refuses to leave. In fact it’s kind of your job. You don't even have to throw her in a dungeon if you thought that too cruel. Just lock her up in a nice room somewhere in the castle until you’ve sorted out the mess yourself. 

The series wants to treat Rapunzel as the underdog when she isn’t, and her failure to wield her power effectively doesn’t make her look ‘nice’ it just makes her look stupid and grossly incompetent. This is a conflict that didn’t need to have happened and Rapunzel let it happen.  

Oh, So Now Y'all Riot

You didn’t complain when the king orphaned children with his crack down on crime. You rolled over as he dolled out overly harsh punishments to poor people who committed minor offences. You gleefully went along with the royals as they  scapegoated a child for their mistakes, even as they endangered your homes.  And ya’ll sat on your asses while invaders pulled off a coup and enslaved you. 

But this is what you get mad over? A rumor about a mythical creature existing that your princess has zero control over. Seriously? 

Man, I hate the townspeople in this show. 

Pointless Dream Sequence Is Pointless

This scene tells the audience nothing new and just wastes screen time. 

This Is the Wrong Lesson to Focus On Rapunzel

We do not tell the 12 year old to unload their phycological issues onto their baby sister!

You’re telling me parents were involved in writing this show? What the hell!?

Rapunzel you are the adult here. At 20 now you should be more adept to handle listening to the deep seated emotional traumas of a little girl than a fucking 10 year old! And if you’re not, or don’t want to, then it’s your job to find another adult who will. 

That’s the core problem with this entire episode. It treats Red’s and Angry’s problems as some eternal issue that they need to work out and not as the inherent failure of the adults around them that it is. 

It is neither Red’s nor Angry’s decision on weather or not they get live on their own. Nor is it their responsibility to be each other’s therapist. Yes, a change in living arrangements is always stressful and for children with abandonment issues it can be hard to readjust, but that’s when you need to step it up and deal with the problem; not shove it off onto the kids themselves! 

Monty Is Useless

Is this all Monty is good for? Being a red herring in ridiculously simple mysteries? Is this why we wasted a whole episode introducing him back in season one? Really?

Why Are We Still Treating Old Corona As Being Separate from Corona Itself?

Look, I get that it’s a joke, but it’s a joke that highlights how poorly thought out the worldbuilding is in the series. Is the Coronan government in charge of Old Corona or not? If so then you can just make those lease laws yourself as the acting regent Eugene. If not then Frederic shouldn’t have had any say in the matter of relocating Old Corona’s citizens nor putting a child outside of his jurisdiction under arrest.

But more importantly this is a just a repeat of that vague level of responsibility Rapunzel has for people who live off the island. She can’t order a whole village to be rebuilt while simultaneously claiming that she bares no accountability for Varian and Quirin’s problems in season one. 

Replacing Guns with Crossbows Isn’t the Safe Option That the Censors Think It Is

I find it kind of amusing that censors will ban showing a 17th century blunderbuss but allow it to be replaced by a weapon that is still mass produced today and can be bought in any Walmart across the country. Like I’m a major advocate for gun regulation in real life, but even I have to find this to be a bit silly. Crossbows aren’t some fantasy weapon. People still own and use them. But it would be seriously hard to get ahold of a working antique firearm.  

Seriously This Is How the Girls Have Been Living and the Adults Haven’t Done Anything About It Until Now?

I feel like I’m beating a dead horse by now, but it’s so engrained into the episode I have to keep bringing it up. The show itself is visually telling us that Red and Angry can’t keep living this way, but it never wants to call Rapunzel and the other adults out for not rescuing them from this life sooner. 

So All This Tells Me Is That Rapunzel Could Have Easily Checked Up On Varian In Painter’s Block, But Didn’t.

Remember they’re right next to Old Corona; meaning that Janus Point is also right next to Old Corona. Meaning that Rapunzel could easily have checked up on Varian right after Painter’s Block and choose not to. With each passing episode Rapunzel has less and less excuse for her behavior in season one. 

Yeah Remember that Plot Point That Wound Up Being Entirely Irrelevant to the Story?

In jokes don’t cover your ass when you make poor writing choices. Quite the opposite in fact as all you’ve done is remind the audience of all the various dangling plot threads that you will fail to follow up on. The disciples plot goes no where and serves no purpose, and it should not have been introduced as this big important thing if you weren’t going to do anything with it. 

Nice Idea, Poor Execution

I’ve heard fans of this episode tell me that they enjoy it because of this scene with Red. If you’re a naturally introverted person or neurodivergent and have trouble communicating at times then Red’s speech here can strike a cord. Which is cool; I’ll never deny someone’s feelings and if a piece of media speaks to you on a personal level for whatever reason that is great. What I’m here to discuss though is story structure and whether or not the story’s themes are presented well in context of what it’s set up. 

The conflict here does not work from a pure structural standpoint because it’s a surface level deflection of the real issues. Red’s problem isn’t that she is being ignored, it's that she’s been abandoned. Now communication issues can arise from that abandonment and feeling heard can be step forward in working those issues out, but Red’s central trauma isn’t going to be magically fixed by people ‘listening’ to her, i.e. being granted whatever she wants, but by providing her with a real home and with a real guardian to look after her. 

Because what Red wants on a surface level is harmful to her, and the reasons why she wants what she wants needs to be addressed more so than then sedating her angry outbursts in the moment. This is treating the symptoms not the cause.

So What Is or Isn’t Real About the Curse?

Once again, we finally get some actual lore and rules for magic and the writers are already throwing it away during the same episode they are introduced. I now have as little context for how the wolf curse works within the Tangled world as I did before the episode started. 

This Is Sweet, But Once Again Context Brings It Down.

So just to reiterate, this a surface level resolution to the conflict of the episode that doesn’t actually address anything. It might feel like an appropriate ending but only if you ignore the fact that Red and Angry are orphans who’ve been abandoned but the adults. 

Angry apologizing here to Red does not solve any of their problems, especially since Angry, as a child herself, is not responsible for her sister’s behavior, feelings, nor well being. That falls to the adults and they fail to address Red’s core issues and their own failings to her in their apologies as well. Not to mention that the very next scene undermines any optional progress that could have been made here. 

Listening to Someone Does Not Mean Giving Them Whatever They Want

This does not fix anything. Red and Angry are still left to live on their own without any real supervision. Giving them a big play house is not providing for them, it’s spoiling them. Would you let all the other orphans in the local orphanage roam free without an adult to take care of them? No!? Gee I wonder why? Could it be because letting a 12 and 10 year old raise themselves is a very stupid idea? One that will potentially damage them later in life assuming that they don't get themselves killed in the meantime. 

Moreover this is yet another example of the series overall problem with not understanding that compromise and resolving conflicts does not mean rewarding the characters at the end with everything that they want without having them work for it. That’s not how life works and it’s not how good story telling works. 

This Is Beyond Irresponsible

No! Bad Show! Bad! 

You do not get to pretend that negligence is the same thing as compromise. Yes I know Eugene said to come to him when they have a problem, but as demonstrated by this very episode children do not always know when to ask for help nor can they always find it when needed, that is why parents exist!  

Nor does the show get a free pass for turning it’s main characters into child abusers who neglected three minors multiple times now. Even when they themselves are victims of that same abuse!

How utterly blinkered do you have to be to not see the problem here? 

It’s the Return of the Pointless Parallels

Let me count the ways for how stupid this is. 

Red and Angry’s conflict has no impact on the on going narrative. Even with them now being reoccurring characters they still manage to contribute nothing to the future storylines involving Cass. 

Neither Rapunzel nor Cassandra learn anything from Red and Angry’s spat; Rapunzel because she refuses to acknowledge her own flaws and Cassandra’s not even here for any of it. 

The sister’s dynamic between Raps and Cass is not well established and the writers mange to piss all over it by series end because of gay baiting and poor writing. Therefore relying on lazy parallels to other siblings in the show to bolster this connection falls flat.  

Red and Angry’s argument has nothing in common with Rapunzel and Cass’s current fighting. One is about abandonment issues and the other is about shallow validation. Trying to tie these two themes together actually winds up undermining both conflicts. 

Red and Angry are children. Rapunzel and Cassandra are not. That very much matters. 

Red and Angry didn’t drag innocent people into their petty bitch fight and endanger them because they wanted to feel special. 

This Makes Zero Sense

I don’t know; she looked pretty happy during Crossing the Line. 

She was also able to control the rocks just fine then, so what happened? 

Not to mention soon after this Zhan Tiri is telling her she needs some sort of incantation to control the rocks, despite being able to already control the rocks.... 

It’s almost as if the writers are full of shit and don’t actually know what they’re doing. 

So Are We Remembering the Burnt Hand or Not?

Does the hand matter or not? Is it ever a motivating factor in what Cassandra decides to do? Is her waning control over the rocks connected to her burnt hand; even though having a burnt hand is what allowed her grab the moonstone in the first place? Did the moonstone heal the hand? Does Raps singing the healing incantation later on heal it? Does Cass have a forever burnt hand? 

Who the fuck knows! 

Not the writers that’s for sure, cause it never comes up again. 

Don’t introduce plot points and then not resolve them. That’s writing 101 guys. 

Wait if she needs the incantation to control the rocks and the angry thing is a lie, then how the heck is she controlling them just now? Make up your dang mind show! 

I swear I lose brain cells whenever I have to rewatch the evil Cassandra plot. It is so dumb  you guys.... so, so dumb. 

Conclusion

It’s not the worst thing ever but series has far better episodes on offer than this one. Even in a season as suck ass as season three. 

So there’s praying that this review posts this time and if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me in my projects feel free to leave a tip on my Ko-Fi. Thank you. 

https://ko-fi.com/rachelbethhines

[yutaya]

Iron Fist Week Day 7: minor character/missing scene

Albert is a man. A man... with a van.

He's proud of his van. Sure it was a bitch and a half to get certified and sometimes trying to drive three freaking blocks in this city when he's having a bad enough day can threaten to put his blood pressure through the roof, but he's ground out an honest living for himself with it. That's no mean feat, in this neighborhood.

Plus, Al likes his job. It involves a lot of visiting every nook and cranny of the area, meeting loads of people at varying levels of talkative - it's a job that requires someone personable, and Al doesn't think it's too immodest to say that he fits the bill.

Staring down a fully loaded armoire, though, Al can admit to himself that there are times he's less fond of this job than others.

By the time he's got the thing down on the sidewalk, doors and drawers bound shut and with an initial layer of wrapping to protect it from pedestrian traffic while he sets up the loader, Al has mentally added two upticks to his pain-in-the-ass fee.

"Woah, can I help you with that?"

Al pauses in his transferring long enough to take a look at who's spoken. It's a white guy, 20s, a little scruffy but looks comfortable, and, most importantly, seems genuine.

Al smiles at him. "I appreciate the offer, but these need to be moved in a specific way to prevent scuffing."

"Oh." Al goes back to loading the armoire. "...Would you show me?" Al pauses again. Looks back at the guy. "I'm Danny, by the way," he adds, and smiles beatifically.

Al blinks up at the sky. Had the sun shone more brightly for a second, there? He turns back to wrapping the furniture with blankets and bungee cords. "You need to move a lot of furniture, Danny?" he asks while he works. Engaging in friendly conversation with strangers is second nature to him, at this point.

Danny, who has the courtesy to remain standing out on the street behind the van as they talk, bounces a little as he replies. "Yes, actually! My girlfriend and I have been redoing her apartment."

"Wow, big project. Hey, if you guys need stuff moved around, I've got you covered. Back and forth from the storage unit, delivering your new stuff from the store, bringing your old stuff wherever it's going... My rates are fair and, as you can see, I'd actually take care of your things." He pats the carefully cushioned furniture from his current job in indication.

Danny laughs a little, looking at it. "At least that isn't a piano, right?"

"Hey man, pianos have wheels. I can walk them right up the ramp."

Danny eyes the ramp Al uses with the handtrucks. "Isn't it too skinny?"

Al laughs again. "What kind of piano are you picturing, a grand?" As if anyone who owned one of those would be hiring Al to move it. As if anyone who owned one of those would be living in this area at all.

Danny shrugs, unbothered. "I haven't seen one since I was a kid. Maybe it seemed bigger back then." A beat passes, and then Danny continues talking, the oversharing sort of babble symptomatic of the sleep-deprived. "Anyway, we'll definitely call you for help with our stuff. And you can show me all the right ways to handle everything! I'm probably going to be doing a lot of rearranging furniture and stuff since Colleen is out at Bayard all the time now; she keeps talking about helping the community during the daytime - Colleen's my girlfriend, she's the best - and, I mean, she's right, of course, plus, we just got back to the city and I am not used to not having to do something -" he cuts himself off, lighting up. "Hey, could I get a job with you?"

Al startles. He can usually recognize when someone's coming at that angle. Granted, they usually don't seem to stumble into it by mistake.

"The shop down the street is hiring," he offers. "On the corner."

"Thanks! I'd like to work for this business, though."

Al pauses. Revaluates "Danny". There are only so many reasons someone would be looking for a moving job specifically, and in this neighborhood, the most likely scenario is one that Al has been very carefully steering clear of for 30 years.

"I appreciate the interest," he repeats cautiously, "but we're a small business. I'm afraid we don't really have the means to hire right now." It's a bit of a risk, revealing a vulnerability like that. Luckily, Albert is overstating it a bit; it won't be that easy for any of the triads to put financial pressure on him, and, well. He's stubborn. He swore a long time ago that he wouldn't go there.

"Oh, that's not a problem!" Danny says brightly. "You wouldn't need to pay me. I'm more looking for the experience, you know? I've never had a normal job, and Colleen thinks it'll be good for us to start over."

The alarm bell clanging in Al's head rises to a shriek, then falters. If this is a ploy, it is astoundingly poorly executed. If this guy is in with any sort of organized crime, he can't be more than a fledgling recruit. Al feels a moral obligation to try and steer him better, even if his self preservation instincts disagree.

"Look," Al says, watching Danny's face carefully. "I'm running an honest business, here. I'm not interested in having our name attached to anything. And, if I could offer you a word of advice?" Danny, who mostly just looks confused, nods. "Don't go saying that stuff about working for free. Depending who hears it, that's a good way to end up either severely taken advantage of, or in a coffin. Anyone you might be trying that hard to get a resource for won't be happy about you overplaying your hand."

Danny still looks confused. Al mimes swinging a hatchet. Danny's eyes go wide with clarity.

"I'm not with the triads," he says disconcertingly earnestly. "I'm the Iron Fist. I'm sworn to defend the city from people like them."

...Ok.

Well, at least this is an interesting conversation.

"If you're not with the triads, why do you want this job?"

"I guess I'm looking for something new. For fifteen years, I had one purpose. Now, it's done. Now, I need to build a new life, and..." His voice dips in a certain way with the next words, a way that makes Al's stomach sink with the familiarity of it. "...keep a promise to a friend."

Al looks at Danny, a pit in his stomach and memories in his heart. Resignation settles underneath his skin.

"You have a résumé?" he asks. At least Danny doesn't seem inclined to just throw things around, like some other shipping companies that Al could name. Royal Al Moving provides quality for its clients, thank you very much.

"I don't think so. What is that, equipment? I could buy some."

Al stares at him. He'd been expecting either an agreement to email or bring by a copy later, or a conversation along the lines of 'do I really need one?' followed by a verbal listing off of previous work or even just ability.

"Do you have any previous experience?" Al tries again. "Had any jobs before?"

"Yeah, I have," Danny says, and doesn't elaborate.

White people.

"What about ID?" Al asks, despite knowing full well he'll probably pretend not to notice if anything seems off about it.

Danny laughs a bit, seemingly unphased by his own complete lack of knowledge regarding ordinary job application/interview etiquette whatsoever. "Oh, I definitely have that. Had to fight really hard for it, too. It was almost all gone, but once everything got sorted out, we made, like, 10 new copies of everything." Danny pats around at his pockets, not appearing to notice Al's incredulous expression. "I don't have any of those with me right now, but... Ah ha!" He pulls something out triumphantly. "Business cards! I'm pretty sure my brother thought I was just going to destroy them, but my friend Jeri said it's important to always have one. It might have gone through the laundry, though, sorry."

Assuming this day can't get any weirder, like a fool, Al takes the card.

Even worn and slightly crumpled, the obnoxiously expensive quality of the original card is still clear. There's embossing and gold foil, for god's sake. The Rand Enterprises logo glints up at him almost mockingly even as the three dimensional lines of the border rise and fall under his thumb. Either seems unnecessary and frankly tone deaf for a Humanitarian Aid company, let alone both. Then again, maybe they reserve this version of the card for the executive level, those who hobnob among the elite, who need to make a certain type of impression on the too rich in order to convince them to donate well.

Because that's another thing this card reads, right there in plain English: a 9pt bold 'Daniel Rand', and under that, 'CEO'.

'What,' a little voice in Al's head wails semi-hysterically, 'the fuck?'

"Is this a joke?" Al asks out loud, vaguely surprised by how calm he sounds given the way the voice inside his head might be having a meltdown. "Am I on Candid Camera?"

But, no, wasn't he just thinking that this card is way too expensive - and thus definitely too expensive to be a prop?

"Hey, I know that one!" Danny Rand says cheerfully. "Joy and I used to watch it together!"

'Joy,' the voice in Al's head supplies. 'Joy Meachum.

'Well, at least this explains why he said he doesn't need money.

'Wait, why is he looking for a job in the first place? Is he not CEO? Did they kick him out or something? Did they disown him for wearing a hoodie with holes in it? Is that what he meant earlier when he said the thing he was doing before is over now?'

Al has never felt more rueful that he doesn't pay much attention to celebrity news.

"So," Al tries to find a way to word this that isn't 'have you been cut off or what?' "Why is Danny Rand looking for a job here?"

By "here", Al means a lot of things. This type of neighborhood, in general. Chinatown, out of all of them. At a low-wage position in a manual labor business with very little room for growth, if they're really getting into it.

"I like your name," Danny replies. It's far from the kind of answer that Al was expecting, but he finds himself unperturbed. Maybe he's hit a point where nothing is surprising anymore. "It reminds me of a friend. He was more of a Big Al than a Royal one, but I saw your logo and it seemed right."

-

(Al still pays Danny, because he refuses to be a shady business and because if he's finally getting around to setting up an employee system, he's needs to make it one that will work for anyone he might hire in the future, too. They won't all be Danny Rand. Danny keeps finding ways to immediately give it back, because he's literally a billionaire.)

[connorinabeanie]

A slightly salty take on North and fandom

Disclaimer: Nothing in this post is meant as an attack on anyone. Fandom is subjective and you have the right to interpret media, form your own conclusions, and create whatever you want. These are my opinions about what I’ve seen, as well as my experiences in previous fandoms and the patterns I’ve seen play out over and over again. It’s okay to disagree with me, and it’s okay to have a respectful discussion in reblogs/comments! Just keep it civil. That out of the way…

North. She’s polarizing character in DBH; she tends to be loved or hated, and I’ll admit it: I didn’t like her at first either. I wanted to, but as I played through my first time I just couldn’t get past one of her traits in particular, which was that she was so convinced she was right; she blamed Markus for every mistake, refused to adapt her tactics or consider other methods, and seemed more driven by vengeance than anything else. So as much as I wanted to enjoy her character, I found her to be a poorly written “strong female character” archetype that fell flat in execution, as most characters of that type do.

Honestly, I think this is the reason most people who dislike North dislike her, at least consciously. They genuinely think she’s a terribly written character, and they’re not necessarily wrong. One playthrough on a standard route, with no extrapolation or extra consideration, combined with a lot of people getting the awkwardly forced romance (I actually avoided this, completely unknowingly, on my first playthrough) leads to a dislike of this character. That’s understandable! I would expect this from people who played the game once. But that’s where the problem comes in, for me.

People active in a fandom usually haven’t consumed the media they’re into just once. They usually don’t engage in surface-level interpretation, and they usually don’t lack context. But I find it hard to believe that so many of the opinions and interpretations regarding North could possibly come from people who have approached her character with an open mind and additional information, because just one major path divergence shows a completely different side to North’s character.

I’m talking, of course, about North’s leader route. When we see her in Markus’ role, leading instead of advising, her true motives come out: she loves her people and is willing to fight for them. She isn’t interested in playing nice with her oppressors, and why should she? There’s a whole discussion here about how oppressed people are judged for how nicely they fight for the rights they should already have, where there’s a ‘good’ way of protesting and a ‘bad’ way of doing it (which is, ironically and showing how tone-deaf Cage can be, supported in the narrative of DBH as well), but I won’t go into that in depth; other people have posted really good takes on this already. I’ll just mention it here and there where relevant.

Once of those relevant places is that, as I said, in North’s leader route she isn’t interested in peaceful protesting. And you know what? When I played this game the first time and had Markus, I had been peaceful up until Night of Soul, which is where North would be making her first major decision as a leader if you don’t have Markus. Yet when it came down to it I made the same decision with Markus that North makes on her own, because you know, as a Jewish woman, I wasn’t super interested in peacefully protesting at the gates of camps that were currently killing people. Playing nice hadn’t worked, and it was time to fight.

So maybe I’m in a different position that some others when it comes to interpreting North’s choices, and as I saw that she made the same choice that I did when playing Markus, I’m just… Not impressed that the fandom tendency to criticize this choice as warmongering, unreasonable, and a ‘betrayal’ of Markus’ peaceful actions (always assuming that Markus had been completely peaceful before, which is the way the story pushes on you, but certainly isn’t a given.) As far as I’m concerned, North is taking the action needed to save her people who are in danger right that instant, and humans don’t deserve a nice civil protest (and if I were in her position with Markus alive, I would be furious that he wanted to just sit and talk while people were dying.) They need to be stopped, and she’s going to stop them.

But it wasn’t just her choice in the church that brought me around to North’s side during her leader route, it was her behavior during Crossroads. Specifically, it was her behavior toward Connor, and how it contrasted with some of her actions earlier. So, going back a bit to Spare Parts, where the Jericrew goes on a mission to steal parts from the Cyberlife warehouses at the docks, and you run into John. North votes against taking him with them, citing that they can’t trust him and it’s too dangerous. Moving on a little, to Stratford Tower, if (or, more likely, ‘when’ since it’s pretty difficult to avoid) Simon is injured, North suggests shooting him. These are pretty harsh marks against her, because they seem needlessly ruthless, but are they really?

With John, the answer is maybe yes. But think about it from her perspective; they’ve never seen the ability Markus used, in turning an android deviant. So as far as North is concerned, John was a threat to them about two minutes earlier, and now wants to go with them? With no traumatic catalyst or trusted android vouching for and giving him the key to Jericho? To North John is a potential threat, a potential danger, and she has no reason to trust him. But as the story goes on, North never makes another objection to an android joining them in this way, because she knows they’re truly deviant. As soon as an android is deviant, they’re one of her people.

With Simon, the answer is probably no, because North is exactly right; if Simon lives, and Connor finds him, Connor finds Jericho. It’s that simple, and it’s not a rare series of events. North might be a little fast to jump on the option, because there’s a genuine argument to be made that it isn’t worth killing someone just because there’s a chance that something (even something very serious) might go wrong, but she clearly isn’t choosing this option because she wants it; she’s choosing this option because she thinks it’s the most guaranteed way to protect her people. It’s a difficult, ruthless decision to make, but it isn’t one made out of malice.

(It’s also worth noting that Simon suggests leaving North when she’s in danger in Crossroads, when the only people that would be at risk from saving her were Markus and Connor, and this happens whether or not North suggested killing Simon one the rooftop. Yet this choice is almost never criticized, because it comes from Simon, and I’ll get into that later.)

But with those particular attitudes from North out of the way, it’s interesting to see how she reacts to Connor in her leader route. North instantly shows concern for him, never blames him for the attack on Jericho, and—like Markus—tries to prevent him from going on his suicide mission to Cyberlife Tower. She’s kind and understanding, and it’s clear that she accepts Connor immediately as one of her people.

This is a place where I have some trouble with fandom interpretations of North and Connor’s relationship, specifically in terms of North being angry, cold, or extremely suspicious of Connor (a little suspicion, especially in a more ‘good end’ route where she has less direct interaction with Connor during the revolution, is reasonable; I’m talking about outright refusal to even consider accepting him.) It bothers me for two specific, and somewhat different reasons.

One is that it directly contradicts a theme of North’s history, which is that deviant androids are not their pasts. They’re not what they were before they woke up. The idea of North holding someone’s past, before they turned deviant, against them is just… I can’t imagine it. I can imagine her suspicion, as I mentioned before, until she's very sure Connor is truly deviant, but that seems very apparent to her right away in any route (I find it hard to believe she’d think he was faking deviancy after delivering the army to Markus.) Some concern or suspicion after finding out about the attempted hijacking makes sense, but the way I see it portrayed in fic is often jarring; it seems completely out of character for her to blame Connor for something like that, as opposed to being angry on his behalf, because North wants androids to be free (and, more deeply, she’s experience being used for something she never wanted.) She wants androids to have the chance to live, to become their own people, and to leave their pasts behind them. Why would she blame Connor for what he was made to do, whether before he was deviant or when Amanda tried to take control of him? It goes against everything North stands for, and that leads me to my second reason:

I think people choose this interpretation because it makes North a villain. Maybe it’s not an active conscious decision to do this (and in fact I doubt it usually is), but it reminds me very painfully of the trend in fandom of villainizing a character—especially a female character—in order to woobify a male character (and, often, get the female character out of the way of a ship) and I can’t help but see that here. It seems like a cheap, easy way to excuse other characters turning against North for her behavior, and therefore getting her out of the way as well as causing drama and conflict for the characters the writer really wants to focus on.

And that seems like a good segue into the big topic that people are gonna get mad about being called out on: misogyny. And even more specifically, misogyny when it comes to shipping.

I’m just gonna state this super clearly at the forefront: I have no problem with shipping whoever you want, whyever you want. I’m not personally into most ships for various reasons, but I do have some favorites (most of which other people aren’t into) and shipping is fun! Not everyone agrees on shipping, and that’s okay; not everyone has to like what you like, we can all still exist in harmony.

But that isn’t to say that people don’t engage in, for lack of a better word, ‘problematic’ behavior in their ships. As opposed to just going ‘hey, I like this, I’m gonna do it’, way too many people become obsessed with justifying their ship (and I think this comes from an underlying desire to ‘prove’ it’s canon or based in canon, as a way of making it seem more legitimate, which is a whole other topic I could rant about.) In the process of these justifications, and then often as a part of the fixation or obsession that some people develop about their ships/characters in their ships, any character or ship that ‘threatens’ someone’s favorite is a target that must be destroyed. And, in what I would say is arguably the vast majority of times, that threatening character is a canon female love interest.

Open bashing has (with good reason) gone out of fashion in fandom, so the way to get characters ‘out of the way‘ is to argue an unlikeable interpretation of them. I feel like this is what happens a lot of the time with North, and with the poor writing and flat portrayal of her character in the ‘good end’ route, it’s very easy for people to take the worst of her personality, say it’s canon, and then get rid of her. This is usually a bit side-eye worthy when it happens in any fandom, but it’s extra ridiculous in DBH for one very distinct reason:

North doesn’t have to be a love interest. As I mentioned before, when I first played through I never got the ‘lovers’ scene, because North said way back when Markus first met her that she didn’t want to talk about her past and so in the scene on the roof I just didn’t ask her (and I could write another whole discussion about how no means no and pressuring someone to tell you their past is NOT how to get a romantic option with them, but that’s an issue with another time.) The rest of the game progressed completely as normal, with the only changes being a lack of kissing options in a few later scenes. There’s no reason why fic writers can’t just choose this option for their fic’s canon, and move on.

And yet I can’t tell you how many times North is an obstacle that has to be overcome in order to get Markus with Simon or Connor (because let’s be real, North, Simon, and Connor are the only major ships for Markus even though Josh is RIGHT THERE, but again that’s another topic for another time.) It’s completely unnecessary, and yet there it is: North is this unreasonable, horrible person who is terrible to [insert love interest here] and Markus has to overcome this internal struggle to break free and be with [whoever] and truly be happy.

It’s such nonsense. It’s using this ‘undesirable’ female character as a source of drama and angst for this poor sad male character to have to deal with, as opposed to taking even a moment to treat the female character as a person who might have motivations, experiences, and emotions, and I’ve seen this over and over and over in every single fandom I’ve ever been in. This isn’t a North-specific thing, it’s a female character thing, and honestly if Kara’s storyline weren’t so separate from the fandom favorite shipping characters then I think the same thing would happen to her (as opposed to her existence just being entirely ignored.) This is such a pattern in fandom that I find it very difficult to believe this is a special case where it’s somehow legitimate.

One of those reasons is that the ‘justifications’ for disliking North tend to be complete double standards between North and whatever love interest the writer is going for, whether that’s Simon or Connor. With Connor, it’s extremely obvious; almost all of North’s negative traits are traits he has to some extent as well (ruthlessness, solving problems through violence, stubbornness,) but those traits are not only not usually treated negatively in Connor (and instead are depicted as justified and necessary in context, which I’m not saying they aren’t, but that it’s unfair to say that about him and not her) but often erased entirely, leading to the obnoxiously delicate, wilting flower version of Connor that shows up in so much fic. But again, an issue for another time.

For Simon, it’s less obvious because North and Simon are quite different, but not in opposite ways; North and Josh are opposites in many respects, but Simon is, in a sense, perpendicular to the line North and Josh are at opposite ends of. Simon doesn’t have particularly strong opinions about anything, just going with the flow and being supportive; his strongest opinions are about being cautious and not taking risks. Except, of course, for that scene I mentioned before, where he outright says they should just leave North to die. For such an overall bland character, that needlessly harsh moment stands out to me and I find it kind of amazing how it’s just completely ignored, often while holding it against North that she suggested shooting Simon on the roof.

So I guess the whole point of this rant is that I wish people would think more critically about North as a character, rather than a flat archetype, especially in the context of shipping. It’s cringey and painful to see blatant flanderizing of her character for the sole purpose of being ‘able’ to ship other characters together, whether to use her as an antagonist or just to get her out of the way, when it’s completely unnecessary to begin with. It’s also very obvious where someone’s priorities and biases lie when they’re happy to write North off but then obsess over other poorly written, bland, or even outright purposefully antagonistic characters that they deem somehow to have more potential and be more worthy of attention and character development.

Overall, there’s no requirement to like a character. It’s totally fine not to like a character. But double standards and needless demonizing of a character go far beyond not liking them, and it’s important to stop and think about why it might be happening. Is it always misogyny with North? No, I don’t think so, there are definitely people who don’t like her for her traits and that’s fine. But I think it’s very telling when someone who claims to dislike North for her personality and behavior then spends time in fan works purposefully making her a villain for the benefit of drama in their pet ship. It’s even more telling when someone who claims to dislike North for her personality and behavior, yet they celebrate the potential of characters that are canonically far worse (but who just so happen to be attractive men.) And, unfortunately, both of those situations coincide quite often with vocally disliking North, and there are only so many ways to interpret such a correlation.

[mochismilesbrighterthansun]

Fragmented Glass

Chapter 5

Pairing: Kim Namjoon x reader

Warnings: This story deals with a miscarriage. Mentions of death. Dubious consent. Semi Smut.

Word Count: 5,973

Genre: Angst, Smut, Enemies to Lovers.

Summary: You had the choice of an arranged marriage, upon meeting Namjoon he acted as if he actually cared for you but as time passed you realize that this would not be a fairy tale.

A/N: Thank you so much for reading, if any of the topics above make you uncomfortable please don’t read.

It was the day for the charity, you had hardly seen Namjoon for the rest of the week but it was to be expected. Your last encounter with him had been bad, but he had made no move to better things between the two of you. The stylist who had come to do your hair and makeup had left and you sat in your robe staring at your dress laid out on the bed for you. You wondered if he even wanted you to go with him anymore, and you couldn’t ask, there was no way you would go to his room to ask.

You sighed and went to change into your dress, once you were done you stared at yourself and went to put your earrings on. That’s when you heard a soft knock on your door followed by the door opening.

Namjoon was dressed in a pair of sweats and a white T-Shirt, his hair was styled but he was not dressed for a party. When he fully saw you his back stiffened and you could see him eating you up.

“If you changed your mind about the gala you should have told me.” You said turning around and walking towards your closet to get rid of your dress.

Namjoon followed you into the closet.

“I came to get my tux, it’s in here.” He clarified he was looking anywhere but you. That attracted your attention the last time you saw that suit it was in Nari’s hands.

“Please in the future do not let your secretary slash lover come into my bedroom.”

That seemed to shock him.

“Excuse me?” He seemed affronted.

“I said-” he got right in front of you.

“I heard what you said and I am going to stop you before you make me really angry.”

He was defending her. As expected. You moved away from his reach and slammed the closet door closed. You went to sit on the bed and put your heels on.

“Let’s go.” Was all he said when he came out of the closet looking perfect as ever.

He led you to the limousine that would take you both to the event. And once the limousine was in motion he cleared his throat.

“We are going to be in a public setting please refrain from speaking to one of the many guys you would have preferred to marry you.”

You scoffed, “Same goes to you I sure hope Nari doesn’t show up to tell you you have an important appointment or just to see how you’re doing.”

Namjoon didn’t say anything after that, the ride was completely silent and uncomfortable. When you arrived Namjoon got off first and held his hand out for you. You took it and allowed him to lead you inside.

The event was much like the ones you were used to at this point, people wearing expensive clothes and drinking expensive drinks. You went to sit at your designated table to find Jimin already sitting there. You tried to sit down immediately but Namjoon grabbed your arm to prevent you from doing so.

“Park, I told Maximilian not to do this.” He almost growled but all Jimin did was smile gently.

“I understand Kim but this was my designated table to sit,” he lifted a small paper with his name scribbled. “See? Park Jimin.”

You looked up at Namjoon and he immediately pulled the chair next to the one that you were about to sit on. You sat down and waited for him to leave but he took the seat in between you. Jimin chuckled.

“I see you found a dress Y/N it’s very beautiful.” He commented.

“Thanks Jimin.”

“Don’t you agree Namjoon?”

Namjoon looked uncomfortable at the question and you almost stopped him from answering.

“My wife always looks beautiful Jimin.” He said this without looking at you and it surprised you.

“Will you be donating to spend a weekend in Namjoon?” Namjoon was reading the pamphlet with the locations acquired and almost rolled his eyes at his question.

“Where are your parents Jimin?”

“They had to travel to Tokyo for a business meeting. I am here representing them.” He explained, Jimin was going out of his way to be nice to Namjoon who you knew he disliked. “You didn’t ask but I saw there is a property in Hawaii I am excited to donate for that location. Have you ever been to Hawaii Y/N?”

You felt Namjoon stiffened beside you and you knew why Jimin was being so smug. He was aiming for Namjoon’s property.

“Not yet, but hopefully soon.” Namjoon and you had not been married for a long time and any pretense at a honeymoon was thrown out the moment he admitted to being forced to marry you.

“I really hope we can go sometime.”

“This is highly inappropriate Jimin I am right here and you are inviting my wife on a trip?” Namjoon was enraged, he was looking directly at Jimin.

“I was inviting her as friends obviously, but you shouldn’t be concerned after all the trips you’ve made with your secretary Y/N still trusts you. The same level of trust would be appreciated.” Jimin explained and you couldn’t help but admire the way he pushed not caring about the outcome.

Namjoon stood immediately and grabbed Jimin’s lapels. You stood at the same rate and grabbed onto Namjoon’s arm trying to have him stop. Jimin wore the same easy smile he always wore as he patted Namjoon's shoulder.

“Of course it could always be you, the one to take her.”

You felt Namjoon’s hold relax slightly.

“Namjoon people are staring.” You whispered, he let go and took his seat again. You looked towards Jimin to throw an apologetic look but he had a smug smile, he winked at you and sat right back down.

“Hello everyone!” Maximilian called through the microphone on the front. “I want to thank everyone for coming but also everyone who made this charity possible by donating your properties for weekends. We will begin these auctions shortly. Please look at the properties and where the bidding starts. Again thank you!” He handed the microphone to another person and stepped away from the stage.

The auctions began and one by one the properties were auctioned to the people around the room. Namjoon showed little to no interest in any of them. Until Jimin’s property.

He wouldn’t give up, whenever someone would outbid him he would raise it and raise it until finally he got it.

For the first time during the night you felt dread. The only reason he fought so hard for it was because he wanted to take it from him even if it was only for a weekend. He did it to hurt him. You excused yourself to go to the restroom and stayed there for a couple of minutes making sure the tears were at bay.

“Y/N!” Olivia’s voice snapped you from your thoughts. “I saw Namjoon and said hi to him and he said you were in the bathroom.” She saw your eyes, “Is everything okay?”

“I’m fine, your brother is fine. I just needed a breather from all of that.” You motioned outside.

“I see.” She looked down then back up, “Seokjin is out there if you want to say hi. I don’t think Alisson is coming. She is about to pop.”

You smiled at that. “I know she sent me a picture and said she couldn’t see her feet, Jungkook must be so happy.”

“Yeah as any soon to be dad should be.” You flinched at her words. “I didn’t mean…..”

“It’s okay, my baby ….. he just wasn’t meant to be if I hadn’t been so preoccupied with other stuff I might have noticed….” Olivia was shaking her head.

“This was in no shape or form your fault. So get that out of your head.”

“Thanks, I am heading out.” You looked away from her and walked out before she could try to further analyze you.

You sat back down and Namjoon was strangely gone. You left the seat in between you and Jimin empty but that didn’t stop him from talking to you.

“I got Namjoon’s property.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

You looked at him apologetically, “And he got yours Jimin.”

He laughed, “I don’t really like that thing, it’s too big and empty. I only bought it for real estate value but never stayed there for longer than a day.”

“You’re a little devil huh?”

He winked, “ oh you have no idea.” He licked his plump lips and made you do a double take.

You felt someone behind you and turned around to find Seokjin. You rose from your seat and allowed him to hug you.

“Hey, haven’t seen you since you were waiting tables.” He commented.

“Jin” you complained.

“Ha ha, it was a joke, relax.” He grabbed your hand and pulled you. “Let’s go take a little walk.” He led you through a set of balconies where several people talked in hushed tones. “The other day Namjoon called, he was really concerned for you. You were just gone.”

“I wasn’t gone, I was in a guest room.”

He groaned, “Is that why Namjoon has been in such a bad mood? You guys are sleeping in separate rooms again?” As he said this a waiter approached him and whispered something. “Hold on I’ll be back.” He walked away leaving you to lean against the railing. That’s when you heard it.

“How can you do this to me?!” You could be blind and probably half deaf but Nari would be someone who you would always be able to recognize. And her angry voice that came out in almost a yell would be no different. “Namjoon I told you I could come. You didn’t need to bring her.”

“Look Nari she is my wife what do you want me to do? Besides, you are only my secretary.” Namjoon’s voice was calm and collected.

She gasped, “You should have never taken her back.”

Damn if that didn’t hurt, you were about to leave without feeling the humiliation of being noticed when you turned and saw Seokjin. You almost ran to him but it was too late.

“Y/N! Let’s go back inside.” Seokjin’s voice was heard by everyone.

You turned to find both Nari and Namjoon staring at you. Nari as usual wore her sick satisfaction knowing how much it hurt to hear things like this.

You rushed to Seokjin but walked past him and reached into the closest tray with alcohol. You gulped the drink, one turned to two and then you simply lost count. It wasn’t until Jimin was holding you because you almost fell that you realized how drunk you were. And even then you reached for more alcohol.

“Okaay, now we are cutting you off.” Jimin said reaching for a cup of water and handing it off to you but you waved it away.

“I want one of those.” You slurred pointing to the waiters.

“Come on Y/N, you’re drunk.”

You hugged Jimin and lay your head on his chest hearing his heartbeat. And you wondered what if you had married him instead. What if you had not ignored the red flags. What if….

“I think you need to go home.” He mumbled but he wasn’t done by the time you were shaking your head.

“I don’t have one.” You said sadly and almost burst into tears.

“I’ll take you to my place then.” He offered, you made no objections. He began leading you outside when Namjoon showed up.

He reached for you but you pushed his hand away. You slipped and with your heel your ankle got hurt. You groaned in pain and both men were on you in an instant.

“Are you an idiot why would you let go?” Jimin complained in a hush tone.

“She pushed me away.”

“She is drunk.” Jimin argued.

“And she is right here and she is getting annoyed.” You slurred and then laughed. “I’m going with Jimin so you can take your precious secretary back to your house and have sex with her comfortably” your laughter shook your whole body but you felt tears at the corner of your eyes. “Is okay I pinky promise Jimin won’t touch me. Your merchandise will be returned untouched to you in the afternoon, because the merchandise is tired and dizzy.”

People were beginning to look towards your direction and Namjoon lifted you in his arms. “Tell the driver to meet me in the front.” Namjoon barked. Seokjin moved quickly and by the time you exited the limousine was there.

He pushed you in and stood talking to Seokjin. “The shit you do is just…” he trailed off.

“Jin!!” You yelled from inside, he leaned in and smiled. “Can I stay with you tonight? I’m trying to give privacy to the love birds but Namjoon is so stubborn, tell him you won’t ruin the merchandise please.”

He smiled almost sadly, “I’ll make sure he takes care of you.” He leaned back and looked at Namjoon, “You are truly a piece of crap for making her feel like she is an accessory to you, if you are gonna make her feel that way the least you could do is cut her loose.”

“He can’t! He paid for me already so I have to stay!” You yelled from inside.

Seokjin never acknowledged your statement. Namjoon went inside the limousine and sat down next to you.

“You are still on time” you singsonged. “I think Nari is going to be disappointed she came all-”

“Will you stop!” That shut you right up, you waited until you reached home and then Namjoon still carried you to your room.

When he set you down on the bed you didn’t let go causing him to fall on top of you. When he tried to get up you didn’t let him.

“You know I didn’t have to go. Would have saved me the trouble of getting ready.” You commented.

“You didn’t, someone got you ready.” His eyebrow rose and you burst in laughter. Something about seeing you laughing made him smile showing his perfect set of dimples.

“I like these.” You said touching them, “but you are never happy when you are around me.” You almost cried then, “I am sorry you’re stuck with me, I shouldn’t have done this to you.”

“Y/N what are you talking about? Stop okay?”

“Namjoon I……” you gagged and he lifted both of you immediately and led you to the bathroom, you began throwing up. He held you as you threw up and you could only gag as there were no more contents in your stomach.

At some point he had taken his jacket off and folded his sleeves to help you keep your hair off your face. When he saw you were done he lifted you and took you to wash your face and brush your teeth. He was gentle in his ministrations, he took your dress off slowly and almost groaned at the sight of you in only a set of panties. He put on the Shirt he had taken off when he came to change. He took you to the bed and laid you, he pulled the covers on top of you and he was about to leave when you pulled on his hand.

“Please stay?, I know I’m probably the last person you wanted to spend the night next to but please?” You begged pathetically, you didn’t expect him to agree so quickly. In an instant he was getting into bed behind you wrapping his arms around you acting like he cared.

“Try not to throw up on me please?” His hot breath brushed your ear and you shivered. You turned around in his arms to face him and tried to kiss him but he shook his head. “Not like this Y/N.”

Not while you’re all drunk. But you had semi sobered up. You turned back away from him and allowed him to embrace you. You fell asleep exactly like that.

You had pain, your whole body hurt. Your head. Fuck everything hurt. You didn’t realize you were groaning until Namjoon’s voice made your eyes pop open

“Are you okay?” He asked sounding concerned, you hated the warmth that spread through you whenever he gave you kindness.

“I don’t know I have a headache and everything hurts.” You moaned, squeezing your eyes shut.

“I’m going to bring you something, it must be the alcohol you drank last night.”

“What?” Your eyes finally opened and you turned to face him. You had no memory of drinking.

He looked confused at your question, “You don’t remember? You drank like a champ last night.”

“Why? I don’t remember …” you turned back and hugged a pillow to you.

Namjoon would be damned if he reminded you why you were drinking. He could only shrug, “I am not sure but it’s okay, it happens.” he was being too comprehensive for your liking.

You tried to get up but groaned at the pain that shot through your leg.

“Stop trying to move, you fell yesterday.”

“Oh God.” you moaned covering your face. “Why did I make a fool out of myself?” you complained, “Why did you let me drink that much!”

“Right.” he chuckled, “Like I can stop you from doing something you want to do.”

“You should have at least had the courtesy to bring me back home if I was getting out of hand.” you said through gritted teeth.

You rarely called his house home. He heard you telling Jimin you didn’t have one. Hearing you say that so offhandedly, like a habit was heartwarming for him.

“I’ll try to next time.”

“Trust me there won’t be a next time.” you groaned, squeezing your eyes.

“I’ll call someone to bring you something for the hangover.”

Nari, he was calling Nari. In your self induced painful state that hurt even more, without thinking about it you reached for him and pulled his arm around you. You didn’t turn to see his reaction and you missed the surprise that flashed across his face.

“Can you just stay?I really feel like shit.” you said, your voice wavered afraid of his rejection.

“Yeah I just have to call someone.” he muttered, not moving an inch.

“It’s okay I’ll just go back to sleep.”

“But you need to eat something,” he argued.

“Not right this second, it can wait. I can wait.” you closed your eyes and pulled his arm a little tighter to your body too afraid to let go.

Namjoon stared at your sleeping form, the way you clutched his arm as if it were your lifeline. He couldn’t complain, he had never held you this way before. He couldn’t remember the last time you had asked him to be in the same room as you by your own choice. He dialed a phone number and had the driver bring over food and some medication to help with your surely swollen ankle.

You slept for a while before you began stirring again, you weren’t sure if it was pain or hunger what woke you up. But as you did you felt Namjoon holding you tightly. You tried to move from his hold but it was too tight.

“Namjoon?” you shook his arm. “Namjoon?” you called out more forcefully.

“MMhhh.” his deep growl did something within you, and him nuzzling your neck did not help.

“I need to use the bathroom.” you tried again, finally he moved slightly. Allowing you to climb over him off the bed.

But as soon as your feet touched the carpet a pain shot through your leg and it gave out, you fell on the floor but Namjoon was on you in an instant helping you up.

“Told you you fell.” his voice was groggy from the nap he had just woken from.

“I didn’t not believe you, I just didn’t think it was that bad.” you complained wincing at the tingling sensation all over your leg.

He carried you to the toilet, and helped you sit down.

“I got it from here thanks.” you smiled shyly looking down, missing the smile he threw your way.

After you were done he helped you brush your teeth and wash your face. He carried you downstairs into the living room where there was food set out on the square centered table. Namjoon sat you down and then took a seat next to you. He reached for the remote and turned on the TV.

You reached for the styrofoam container on the table. And laid it on your legs, “This smells great.”

Namjoon smiled, “Yeah you should have never drank.” he said, something snapped inside you and you almost choked on your food.

“You should have never taken her back.”

The words replayed in your head. Namjoon noticed your change and tried to reach for you but you jerked his touch.

“You should have never taken me back.” you whispered, your eyes stung with tears.

“What?”

“That’s what she told you.” if you raised your voice anymore than a whisper you would cry you just knew.

“Y/N”

“Why are you doing this?,” you asked, pushing the food away. You went to stand but your ankle didn’t allow it. He reached for you but you flinched his touch away, “Do not touch me.”

Namjoon related all of this with what had happened last time he did.

“Let me help you to your room at least.” he tried.

“Can you just leave me alone?” you yelled as you limped up the stairs.

You locked yourself for exactly two days. Susan had tried getting you to eat but you just couldn’t. This had reached a point that you just could not take. Namjoon rubbed on your face all the time how much he loved Nari and you just didn’t want to see it anymore.

             ⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰

“I didn’t do anything!, She won’t talk to me.” Namjoon said to Seokjin as he sat across from him.

“I think maybe you should go supervise this new thing with Maximilian in Paris and take her with you just leave all the bullshit here. You guys didn’t have a honeymoon, use this to get closer to your wife.” Seokjin tried.

“You think she is going to Paris for a month with me of all people?, yeah you are crazy.” Namjoon kept working on his computer ignoring Seokjin.

“Yeah I think, if you ask nicely. And for the love of anything, please do not take your secretary.”

Namjoon frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Listen to me, I don’t know what it is about this girl that you just will not let her go and this is messing with your marriage. If you actually have feelings for Nari, I’ll do you a solid and redact your divorce papers.”

“I am not divorcing Y/N.” he said with finality.

“Then do something!”

“Don’t you have anything else to do?Like anyone to sue, papers to see anything Seokjin.”

He chuckled. “Can you just listen to me for once?” he was not giving up.

Namjoon clicked on his phone, “Nari can you get two plane tickets for Paris to leave on Monday?”

“Yes Namjoon.” she responded and he clicked.

“Isn’t it weird she calls you by your first name?” Seokjin questioned.

“Can you drop it?” there was a knock on the door. “Come in.” he called.

“Hello, I have the two tickets. We leave at ten am and -”

“We?” Seokjin asked, “We?” he asked again, eyeing Namjoon.

“Yes, Namjoon asked me -”

Seokjin interrupted with a wave of his hands. “First of Nari this is Mr. Kim, secondly he is going with his wife.”

Nari turned to Namjoon, as if seeking for a confirmation. “Have the ticket changed immediately to my wife’s name.” Namjoon said.

“Yeah, she doesn’t think she is your partner.” Seokjin scoffed sarcastically and left Namjoon alone.

Namjoon had been calling you all day and you hadn’t responded. Usually when you were mad you would still answer his calls. Dread filled him but after the lashing Seokjin had given him he did not want to call Olivia. So he took it upon himself to go to the hospital to look for you. And surely enough he found Olivia.

“Namjoon!” she called and rushed to hug him. “To what do I owe this pleasure?” before he responded she waved at him. “No, don't tell me. I know!”

“Olivia, I’m here to meet my wife. She must have forgotten her cellphone at home.”

The small smile she had seemed to fade and almost pushed him away.

“You don’t remember what day is today.”

“Olivia -”

“You know whenever I feel like things are changing between the two of you you prove me wrong.” she interrupted. “She didn’t forget her cellphone, she was here earlier to see her dad. She was finally able to talk to him. But she should be at the cemetery right now.”

His face contorted in confusion. But then it dawned on him.

“Ah, he remembers.”

“Can you and Seokjin just be her siblings already? I swear you guys are always against me.”

“You are wrong, we love you so much Namjoon. I wish you could see things from my perspective. I know if you tried things would be so different between you guys. You have to fire Nari. Cause if you don’t then you will be signing divorce papers very soon.”

His head jerked to that, “Has she told you something about divorcing me?”

“No, but a person can only take so much. And by the way she was acting today.” she made a pause. “Did Nari really say you shouldn't have taken her back and you still didn’t say anything?”

“Nari is not the problem.”

“Namjoon you can defend her all you want, but she is ruining what little progress you make with Y/N. I love you but she is going to make you lose Y/N.” Olivia’s phone began beeping. “Agh fuck, always saved by the bell. Can we have a coffee sometime so we can talk?, I don’t want to attack you, I just want you to be happy.”

“I am going to ask her to go to Paris with me for Maximilian’s new business.”

Her shoulders sagged, “Please don’t take Nari,”

Namjoon rolled his eyes. “I am not.”

“Now I know this wasn’t your idea.” she gasped. “Seokjin, he really is a romantic.”

“You can both kiss my ass.” he groaned.

“No thank you.”  she blew him a kiss and walked away hurriedly.

Namjoon stayed behind thinking of whether he wanted to disturb you or not. Making up his mind he made his way to the cemetery. When he arrived it didn’t take long to find you, crouched on one of the headstones with your mother’s name written on it. What he didn’t expect was the smaller one right next to it. A couple of toys scattered around, they looked new. He noticed your attire completely black. He felt like the wind had been knocked out from him.

It wasn’t the anniversary of your mother’s death. It was the anniversary of your son’s death. Something broke inside of him when he heard your quiet sobs. He had no idea you had taken the time to buy one for your child.

“Y/N?” your back went completely rigid. You didn’t face him, just tried to clear your tears in a desperate attempt. “Y/N?” He tried again.

“I was going to return the phone call after I was gone.” your voice sounded weak, you had no desire to argue or fight with him but he had a way to make things harder.

“I was worried.”

He was worried you were out with Yoongi or Jimin tarnishing his reputation, your mind screamed cruelly.

“I just need a few minutes. Do you mind?” you crossed your arms across your chest but didn’t turn around to face him.

“Would you mind if I stayed?” his voice was soft, you didn’t want to argue at his request.

“No that’s okay.” you mumbled.

You stayed but you were not sure what made Namjoon want to stay, you looked around the cemetery and a service was being held far away. Namjoon was enthralled looking at the small tombstone. ‘Angel’ it read. He had no idea you had even given the child a name.

His heart broke when he heard about your miscarriage. Or abortion, how Nari had called it. Olivia defended you so much, she had ended her friendship with the woman. But he could only think that it was womanly support. Not because you actually cared for Namjoon. He had put it in the back of his mind occasionally thinking of what could have been with this baby.

Suddenly you turned to leave.

“I told the driver to leave.” Namjoon called out.

You stopped and turned to him, his chest hurt at the sight of your swollen eyes and your red nose.

“I’ll take you home.” he said, walking up to you and placing a hand against the small of your back. He drove in silence for a little before breaking it. “I didn’t know you named our son.” he commented.

You faintly smiled. “Yes, Angel seemed fitting.” you turned to look at him. “I didn’t ask because -” you didn’t think he cared. But you couldn’t say it out loud.

“Angel is perfect.” his voice was so quiet and soft, as if he was afraid he could hurt you with the sound of it.

“I know.” you were looking out the window.

“This might not be the right moment to say something, but I was asked to go supervise the new partnership with Maximilian in Paris.”

He really had to hurt you this day of all. A fresh batch of tears stung your eyes. He was going to Paris with his secretary, he was probably bored of you already.

“When do you leave?” your voice was hoarse.

“Actually this trip will be longer than the ones I usually take. It should be around a month.”

Could he stop breaking your heart?, you wondered. He didn’t answer your question, he just dug the knife deeper.

“And I didn’t ask but I got you a plane ticket to go with me. We leave on Monday.” at his words your head spun.

“Me?”

“Yeah, uhm I know we…” he stopped. “I know you might not like it.” he finished.

“It’s fine, I … I just need to let my father know.”

“I heard you were finally able to talk to him, how is he?” he tried to reach for your hand but thought better of it.

You looked surprised at his words and leaned into the seat.

“He is doing so much better, slowly. Olivia said it would be slow but we could see the progress already.” you looked out the window again. “Thank you.” you mumbled.

You didn’t know what you were thanking him for exactly.

“Have you eaten?” he asked.

“No.” you said quietly.

He turned to you but you missed the look he gave you.

“Let’s go eat something then.”

He drove to your favorite Italian place. It was in moments like these that you hated yourself for lapping at the attention or kindness he would give you. He ordered the drinks and your favorite dish. You wondered if you really were that predictable, if that was the reason he grew bored of you. He turned to you and smiled, a soft small smile. He undid the button on his blazer and took it off, leaving him in only a light blue shirt.

You didn’t know how to ask if his secretary was going but you were terrified to ask.

“This business thing.” you started, “Who is involved?” you didn’t know if it made sense.

“It’s Maximilian, the guy who threw the charity and some french partners of his.” he explained.

“Where are we staying?” you inquired, the waiter came with your glasses with water and left. You reached for your glass and sipped on the glass.

“Maximilian has a couple of houses, he said we could take one.” your hands trembled on your lap, you wanted to know but you couldn’t ask directly. Namjoon mistook your discomfort with not wanting to go. “Listen if this trip makes you uncomfortable you need to tell me, I know things are not great with us but I thought maybe we could use a break.” he could not wait to take you away from Yoongi and Jimin.

If you decided not to go with him he could make up a thousand reasons to not go anymore, he would rather let that business fall apart than to leave you there by yourself.

You looked up surprised at his words. “I.. No, it doesn’t make me uncomfortable Namjoon. What time do we leave?” the waiter arrived with the food, and he set up the plate with pasta in front of you, Namjoon’s plate shortly after.  

Namjoon made a pause and then looked at you.

“Our flight is at ten, but we have to be at the airport earlier.”

The rest of the evening was pleasant. You never asked whether Nari was going or not, you could not muster up the courage to ask. If you did it would be giving her more importance than she deserved. You could not think of what to feel, you were sure she was going. Namjoon could never spend a lot of time away from her.

As the driver loaded your bags into the car you felt nervous at the thought of Nari going too. You glanced towards Namjoon, he was busy in a phone call. You loved seeing him dress casual, in a pair of jeans with a beige turtleneck sweater. He turned around catching you staring and you looked away nervously.

He smiled. “Ready?”

He followed you into the car.

“Are we expecting anyone else to come with us?” you asked feigning ignorance.

“No, it’s just you and me. Is that okay?” he asked, eyeing you.

You relaxed against him, “That’s great.” Finally after days you finally let out a sigh and felt your body go completely limp.

Your arrival to the airport was normal, you went to check in with Namjoon. And he acted like a loving regular husband, and for a moment everything seemed perfect. That was until you heard her voice.

“Here you are!” Nari rushed with her suitcase towards the both of you.

You glanced at Namjoon with accusatory eyes. He had said it was only the two of you, of course you had to assume Nari was an extension of him. This hurt more than words could describe.

“Nari, what the hell are you doing here?” this was the first time you had ever heard Namjoon talk to her aggressively.

“You said-”

“I said get a ticket for me and my wife.” he interrupted.

“But you are going on business you might need-” he grabbed her arm and pulled her away.

“Nari, this is not a business trip.” he said bluntly. “This is a trip for me and my wife. I might check on some business but this trip is for her.”

Nari’s eyes glassed, “How can you say this to me?”

“Listen this was my fault. I let this go on for such a long time, I am not sure why. Y/N is my wife and it will remain that way for the rest of our lives. Go home Nari.” he said harshly, he didn’t wait for an answer he turned to walk back to you.

You stared at Nari and then Namjoon. He approached you and grabbed your hand.

“Let’s go.” he said before dragging you alongside him.

[ruffboijuliaburnsides]

voiceless jaskier au (pt 8)

A full chapter today! Gasp shock awe. This means AO3 has also been updated, if that’s your location of choice to read this :)

Thank you all for reading, and for @humbled-bard specifically bc I got a little inspo boost after seeing the nice thing they said in their reblog tags ^_^ (seriously y’all comments are WRITER FUEL, validation is the good shit that makes us go.)

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 9) (Part 10) Now on AO3!

-------------------------

Mahakam's capital was loud.

It was to be expected, obviously, Jaskier knew that. Geralt had explained, in bits here and there, why exactly they had such a robust signal language. The foundries and bells in Mount Carbon alone had cost a number of workers their hearing, so in turn they'd taken the idea of hand signals and turned it into what was, essentially, a complete language. And that's what he and Geralt were, hopefully, going to learn, so that he could have his words back, if not his music. Jaskier found himself thinking of it more as something to look forward to as time went on, because he had so many. He had stretches when they all choked him trying to escaped or disappeared entirely, and he retreated to foggy drifting or lost an hour or so, staring at nothing while still apparently doing things, but they were coming less often, for less time. Which was good, because Geralt was always frowning and sad when he came back.

Geralt had stopped, the day they finally got to the capital, and put wax in his ears, and Jaskier'd wondered about it right up until they finally actually reached the bridge to the city.

It was so loud even to him, even echoing out the gate and across the Langbridge, that there was no way in hell Geralt would've been able to function, with his witcher senses.

The guards at the gate were suspicious, heavily-armored dwarves who did not look particularly like they'd let them in without a damn good reason and possibly a bribe. Mahakam held her secrets close to the chest, it was how they'd managed to keep such a tight hold on their domination of the iron and steel industries, nevermind weaponsmithing, but it meant that it was extremely difficult to gain access as an outsider, especially for a long-term stay. They'd only managed to get through to even reach Mount Carbon because of Geralt being a witcher, most likely, which didn't bode well for actually getting what they were hoping.

Jaskier hoped Geralt would be able to charm the guards, since the biggest contribution he could hope to provide was a smile that he was pretty confident he couldn't quite get past "crooked and nervous". It really didn't help that Geralt had that "getting ready to argue with someone who doesn't want to pay him" look on his face (and really it infuriated Jaskier, in the back of his mind, that he'd seen that face often enough to recognize it), and now Jaskier was imagining being turned away and refused the opportunity to learn how to let his words out and he couldn't make himself keep walking, and he couldn't breathe--

There was a sudden heavy weight on his shoulder and he startled out of his spiral to find Geralt's hand on his shoulder, squeezing lightly. "It'll be fine," Geralt rumbled, and Jaskier was rather sure for a moment that it was less a promise and more of a threat. Not to him, but to... the guards, Mahakam, the universe at large; Jaskier wasn't sure, but it was reassuring anyway.

Geralt didn't make threats lightly. Not real ones, anyway.

Jaskier managed to find a smile in him, shaky but sincere, and nodded in response, which made something soften fleetingly in Geralt's eyes. He released Jaskier's shoulder and strode forward, leading Roach, Jaskier hanging back a few steps fidgeting with the hem of his doublet and tapping his fingertips against his thumbs to try to get out a little of his excess energy. This is exactly why he'd left his tablets in the saddlebags as they approached - with this level of nervous energy, it probably would've gone flying, and then where would he be?

"On official business?" one of the dwarves asked gruffly as Geralt approached. "Don't remember hearing anyone put out a contract."

"Personal business, actually," Geralt said, coming obligingly to a halt just shy of being threatening. "Had a friend get hit with a curse that's left him mute." he gestured behind him, and Jaskier obligingly waved and tried to smile charmingly. Nope, he could already tell, it was more of that kind of half-sick smile when you're hungover and might vomit and are trying your best not to. Well, he'd tried. Maybe the clear discomfort and nerves would work in their advantage.

It didn't appear to be, however, given the way the guard's eyes narrowed looking at him. "And how's that led you here?" The guard asked Geralt after looking Jaskier over.

"Did a job here a few decades back," Geralt said. "Saw the hand signs some of the deaf folks use. Someone told me it's basically a full language."

The guard only raises an eyebrow, not making any move to give them access to the city. Geralt sighed, frustrated, and made a face that Jaskier knew meant he wanted to pinch the bridge of his knows. It probably didn't help that the sounds were almost certainly piercing even through the wax stoppering his ears.

"Listen," Geralt growled, clearly close to losing his temper, and Jaskier impulsively stepped forward and grabbed his elbow. Geralt looked down at him, startled, and Jaskier smiled encouragingly (crooked and scared, but encouraging). Geralt took a deep breath and turned back to the guard, who seemed to be watching their little interaction with slightly less immediate distrust. "Listen," Geralt repeated, but as a proper word, and not just a shape of snarling. "He's a storyteller. A bard. And he had his voice taken. He needs to be able to communicate. And I need to be able to understand."

It warmed Jaskier's heart a tiny bit, to hear him say that. It's not that he hadn't already known that was the plan - learn this and then go on the road together, because using hand signs wouldn't mean much of anything if there wasn't someone who understood them. Still. Hearing Geralt say he needed to be able to understand Jaskier felt good, even if it wasn't the same kind of need Jaskier wanted it to be.

The guard looked between them for a long moment, then nodded. "You'll have to go speak to the Elder," the guard said. "Make your case." He gestured to two of the other guards, who stepped forward. "They'll take you. Don't stray, witcher." Jaskier started to step forward, before Geralt even could, and the guard cleared his throat. Jaskier stopped, uncertainly flicking his gaze from the guard to Geralt.

Geralt growled, low and soft. "Just me," he said, not even really a question. The guard nodded confirmation that Geralt clearly hadn't needed, and Jaskier felt a sharp spike of panic returning. Geralt turned to Jaskier and held out the reins, which Jaskier took on instinct. "Stay with Roach," he said, clearly irritated. "I won't be long."

But he didn't turn away just yet, eyes scanning Jaskier's face, and then he let out a sharp breath. "Jaskier," he said, his voice suddenly so much softer even though the tight lines of anger still shaped the way he held himself. It helped, to hold on to his name shaped like that from Geralt's mouth, and Jaskier took a deep breath to try to steady himself. "Stay with Roach," he repeated, firm but still so painfully soft in a way that Jaskier couldn't let himself think about. Jaskier nodded, and pressed a hand to Roach's neck to ground himself in the warmth and movement of muscles under her skin.

"Sir witcher!" one of the guards snapped, clearly getting impatient. Geralt grimaced, but still stayed focused on Jaskier.

"Do you need to say anything before I go?" he asked seriously, and Jaskier felt like he had a bonfire in his chest from the question, so pointedly and deliberately in contrast to the last time they'd separated. Jaskier shook his head, then made a shooing motion to get Geralt moving.

He thought, maybe, he caught the ghost of a smile on Geralt's face as he turned to go.

Jaskier turned, before he was out of sight, to press his head to Roach's shoulder, letting her mane tickle at his nose when she turned back to lip at his shirt, looking for the little treats he'd taken to carrying as a way to befriend the particular mare. They were friends now, which he wasn't sure if Geralt liked or not, but he still kept sugar cubes or bits of carrot or apple slices on him a lot. Not today, he wanted to say to her. I'm such an idiot for falling for your master, also. I don't know if my heart can handle much more kindness from him, to finish

"Just a precaution," the guard Geralt had spoken with said after Geralt and his chaperones had disappeared out of sight into the mountain, and Jaskier was unprepared to process anyone else speaking.

He frowned slightly and tilted his head at the guard as he pulled his forehead from where he'd rested it on Roach. Should he get his tablet, he wondered, or was that clear enough for people who didn't know him? What did that mean? Were they about to shackle him or something?

"Outsiders who haven't been invited," the guard clarified, his tone more conversational than he'd been with Geralt. "One of the party can, with good reason, make their case to the Elder to be granted leave to stay, either in the city itself or in Mahakam in general. Be a bit difficult for you or the horse to make it, so..."

Realization hit him like a wave of warm relief, pouring down his head and shoulders, and he sagged a bit with it. The guard was trying to be reassuring, had seen Jaskier's stress at being separated from Geralt in such an uncertain situation. And Geralt was fine, because it was normal to send people in alone to see their Elder, to help keep their secrets. He flashed a grateful smile to the guard, then glanced around for an out-of-the-way place to wait for Geralt to get back.

There really wasn't one, since the gates were at the end of a long stone bridge, and Roach could probably stand to have a little time to graze. Jaskier waved a little to get the guard's attention, though he didn't seem to need to, as the guard was attentive as soon as he'd turned back to them. He wasn't sure if it was him doing his job or him trying to make things easier for Jaskier. Jaskier gestured to himself and Roach, then pointed back down the bridge, then mimed... well, sleeping, even if he meant rest.

"Should be safe enough for you and the horse to be out there," the guard said, nodding. "We've patrols that'll come by fairly regular. I'll let your witcher know you're out there, when he comes back out."

Jaskier nodded gratefully, waved again, and started to walk Roach back across the bridge, trying not to feel a thrum of pleasure at hearing Geralt described as his witcher.

The grass was sparse, when they got to the area past the bridge, but Roach seemed happy enough with it. Jaskier knew she was well-behaved but tied her reins to a low tree branch anyway, just in case. The view was beautiful, mountains and distant mines and the faint echo of the foundries barely reaching him on the wind.

It was so silent that each noise there was felt amplified, the soft creak of Roach's saddle as she shifted, the crunching of grass in her teeth, the wind rushing past him, his heartbeat in his ears. It was somehow so much despite being not much of anything at all. He'd always drowned out the silence with music and song. It helped him focus his wandering thoughts, gave him something to narrow the world to so that he didn't try to hear and think everything, and it hadn't been too bad until the last couple of days, as the fog in his mind stopped rolling in. As much as he'd hated the feeling of not being able to think at all... well, it had forced his mind to not go into overdrive. And even if he wasn't talking, somehow Geralt's presence helped offset it all.

He grimaced as Roach moved one of her feet, the sound of the ground under her hoof jarring and sharp, and rubbed his thumb over his fingers.

His lute case sat strapped to Roach's saddle, and even though the thought of playing without being able to sing still sat like molten iron in his stomach and ribs, he was going to have some kind of meltdown if he had to sit here in silence until Geralt came back.

He unstrapped it slowly, handling it gingerly, like it might burn him, then sat on a rock and, carefully, so carefully, unlatched the case and lifted his lute out and set it in his lap.

It shouldn't feel strange for Jaskier to hold his lute, but it did. It had only been a few weeks, but he hadn't played once. He couldn't remember a day between first really learning the lute and the djinn that he hadn't played at least a little, and yet here he was, feeling almost like he wasn't allowed to play.

He glanced over at Roach for encouragement. She didn't seem at all interested in anything he was doing. Well thanks for the help, he thought, and went through the familiar movements of beginning to get his lute in tune. He started to hum a familiar, long-practiced note to help him quickly get the first string in tune, and his hands stilled.

It was such a little thing, he thought, suddenly clutching the lute like it was the only thing tethering him to the mountain. It was such a little thing to both forget and be this upset over. He didn't need to hum, he knew the tuning as well as he knew the feeling of swirling thoughts in his mind when it was starting to race. But he couldn't quite bring himself to continue after that.

It was such a little thing to be this upset by.

(He was such a little thing without his voice.)

He didn't want to be this upset, but tears started to streak down his cheeks anyway. He couldn't move, until one landed on the lute itself, and he instinctively used his sleeve to dry the spot, and then he could move again, and but the lute - a bit too roughly - back in its case, not bothering to properly close or latch it.

Then he turned his back on it and sat on the rock, swiping bitterly at his tears, and waited.

**

It probably wasn't that long before Jaskier heard footsteps on the path behind him and Roach nickered in that way she only did for Geralt, maybe an hour at most. It had felt like days. Jaskier had evolved from sitting and staring into the distance trying not to cry to throwing rocks into the distance and trying not to cry.

Geralt didn't say anything. Jaskier could swear he felt Geralt's eyes burning on him, standing next to the lute case while Jaskier bent down for another rock to fling inexpertly into the trees further down the mountain. But he didn't say anything, not about the lute or the meeting with the Elder or anything, and Jaskier wished he would, wished he would break the damn silence, because he couldn't.

Instead, he heard the soft sounds of his lute being properly seated in its case, the case being latched, and carried over to Roach. Jaskier threw another rock, and the faint sound of the rock's landing was blocked by the sounds of Roach's packs being re-tied and adjusted, to secure the lute in place.

Why wasn't Geralt saying anything?

Jaskier threw another rock.

"Your technique's shit," came Geralt's voice rumbling low right behind him. Jaskier jumped, startled that Geralt had gotten so close without him hearing, and Geralt's hand shot out to steady him so he wouldn't fall. He pressed his hand over his heart and glowered at Geralt, so the witcher would know exactly how much he did not appreciate being startled like that.

Geralt didn't seem to be bothered, just looked down at him with an expression that, for once, Jaskier had no idea how to read. Jaskier's glower faltered. Geralt put another rock in his hand and turned him around to face the direction he'd been. "Pull your arm back like this," Geralt said, nudging Jaskier's arm into the right position. Jaskier felt like he couldn't breathe, for once in a way that was entirely delicious. Geralt stilled for a second, probably assessing Jaskier's form, then backed off a few steps.

"Okay," Geralt rumbled. "Now lead with your elbow."

Might as well, Jaskier thought, and threw.

The rock went easily half again as far as any of the others Jaskier had thrown, and frankly, he was a little proud of that. He turned to Geralt with a grin, to see that same unreadable expression on it as before, but with the tiniest quirk of a smile.

"We'll work on it," he said, untied Roach's reins, and started down the road. "Come on. We're staying in a village an hour or so away. They've got some folks who teach." Jaskier trotted a bit to match Geralt's long stride, feeling almost - finally - like he wasn't drowning at all.

It didn't occur to him for a good half an hour that with one rock Geralt had, quite effectively, distracted him from his frustration and anger.

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 9) (Part 10) Now on AO3!

[iwanthermidnightz]

The following is the summary of Kate’s latest episode on Taylor. Forgive the back and forth and random points... Kate likes to ramble. It was literally an hour and a half of that but she did bring up some good points. This is her analyzing ‘The Archer’ among other things! For the record, I’m writing from her perspective/direct words.

————————————————-

-Thinks The Archer is beautiful, ethereal, and lush

-It’s very Donna Lewis, very Robyn, it’s a nostalgic sound, very Jack Antonoff, very Lorde Melodrama.. its a certain sound reverberating female celestial voices that reminds her of the 90s and she likes it

-It’s a promo single which means it’s released to promote the album, it’s not released to radio stations for airplay- no music video

-Sounds transitional, unfinished song… it’s building

-Released to convey a level of emotional vulnerability

-Taylor said in radio interviews in the UK that this album is very pure and it’s not in response to something like she said reputation was

-“Lover is about what songs would I write for the sake of writing songs? Most of them are about love in the sense that they’re a love letter to love itself”

-We’re in an era with VERY little information

-We’ve seen Joe twice in 2019 (go figure)

-Taymerica, Squad, Calvin, we see her all the time

-Then she gets in this mysterious private ‘relationship’ with Joe almost so much so that there’s no reason to speculate or think about her personal life because it’s so under the radar and she’s never officially talked about him

-She automatically likes his Instagram posts within 2 minutes which a lot of us think is some sort of thing Instagram does for people like her

-She has a theory Taylor and Taylornation can see stories without read receipts (duh)

-The Archer represents a person that's reflecting on their behavior and their patterns and thinking about their relationships in life and thinking about the role of self-sabotage as it relates to your personal relationships

-Talks about the dive bar situation, she needs to spend more time thinking about it

-She talks about the easter eggs leading up to the archer and debates whether Taylor planned this out 3 years ago because of the archer angel in the delicate mv, and the way the people in the delicate mv see right through her, it makes sense

-She always wondered what aspects of Taylors personal life is a media narrative. What has she actually confirmed herself? What are these songs really saying?

-She thinks the songs on reputation sound like really closeted anthems

-It’s none of her business what her sexuality is but it is her business to interpret her songs the way any open-minded person should

-So much of reputation she really read being about a relationship with a woman because it was so grounded in secrecy, quiet moments, darkest little paradise, happened for the first time, I don’t want you like a best friend, everybody thinks that they know us but they know nothing about us, I loved you in spite of deep fears that the world would divide us, I had a bad feeling… (yes she named them all in the same breath)

-Lyrics have never been about the protection and privatization of involuntarily public love, they’ve been lyrics about a perception of a forbidden love -It’s one thing to hide from the paparazzi, and to be like “something happens when everybody finds out, loose lips sink ships all the damn time”, recites ‘I Know Places’ basically- calls it a closeted anthem because Taylor literally comes out of closet doors on the 1989 tour.

-Thinks there are themes in Taylors songs that she might miss as a straight person and doesn’t want to discount them

-She was reading an article in Vulture written by none other than known Kaylor truther Jill Gutowitz, mentioned how Jill very openly talks about Gaylor and Karlie Kloss and even recently Tree Paine liked one of her tweets

-Tree Paine is a mastermind and has boots on the ground everywhere (Indeed she is!)

-Thinks the Tree Paine like was strategic

-Jill said in an article that there were implicitly queer lyrics placed throughout ‘The Archer’: ‘pace like a ghost’, ‘heroes die all alone’, ‘help me hold onto you’, dying alone and holding on to someone who isn’t right for you are all important tenants of the lesbian canon (shes quoting Jill)

-Kate did not pick up on any of that cause shes straight haha

-Mentions how Taylors fans are divided by those who think her songs are blatantly queer and those who don’t and believe the Toe relationship is real bc the media shows them that and they believe it firsthand (true)

-She quotes the reputation prologue “when the album comes out gossip blogs will scour the lyrics for the men they can attribute to each song as if the inspiration for music is as simple and basic as a paternity test and there will be slideshows and photos backing up each incorrect theory because it’s 2017 and if you didn’t see a picture of it it didn’t happen right? Let me say it again louder for those in the back… we think we know someone but the truth is that we only know the version of them that they have chosen to show us.”

-Kate says that those are her actual straightforward words and you can’t read that and say that it's not okay to believe in things we haven’t seen or that it’s calling her a liar to only believe what we’ve seen if she is telling us to our faces that we think we know her but the truth is we only know the version of herself that she has chosen to show us

-That is an admission of Taylor being strategic in what we know, and a ton we don’t know

-The prologue should’ve opened up the doors for an and all theories to be fair game but somehow it divided the fandom deeper than she’s ever seen

-Calling her a liar about what she’s told us thus far is not fair (it takes a mature person to understand that)

-The Taylor Swift strategic businesswoman who keeps us on our toes waiting for new music and clues is part of her success- not all. But there is a difference between that Taylor and the Taylor she is behind closed doors. She’s still a person. So to say she's a liar is not right.

-We can’t imagine what it takes to be in her position and not have lost her mind yet

-Maybe shes had a breakdown but we haven’t seen it (wasn’t that her disappearance before reputation?)

-Kate goes back to ‘The Archer’ and her internal struggle

-She read something that Taylor liked on Tumblr where someone said that The Archer is the song version of her poem called “If you’re anything like me”... epiphany.

-The song is about talking about her shortcomings while simultaneously accepting them and saying if you’re anything like me I’m sorry but you’ll be fine

-Kate recites the whole poem now lol

-Showcases a lot of strength in your weakness and pointing out the importance of going through these things in order to find oneself and to acknowledge that some things are just pillars of the way you are

-Back to the archer - this song is about the unwelcome justice system in her head in terms of patterns, knowing how she's going to react, in terms of wishing she were another way and objectively being able to see that but not being able to feel that is a very human experience to constantly be in between your head and your heart

-You only know your own experience, anyone that's hurt you stays in your subconscious or otherwise and we often react in response or defense of it and when she’s saying “no amount of friends at 25 will fill the empty seats at the lunch tables of your past and the teams that picked you last but darling, you keep trying”

-She has been criticized so many times and publicly taken down, shes felt like she can't do anything right at times

-Brings up the ME! Performance at the Billboard awards and no one talked about the performance, just that she ‘copied Beyonce’

-Stuff like that that was not intentional is often pegged on her for better or worse, correct or not

-To be accused of copying or being tone-deaf when shes probably orchestrated this team to make sure none of that happened would be so thankless and frustrating and sometimes the hate is louder

-At times in her career, she's had no choice but to jump to her own overwhelming defense

-You can't trust a lot of people if you are easily used and you do have to be somewhat cut and dry and I think that being put in an environment where it benefits you to be cut and dry because there are so many shady people but maybe she doesn’t really want to be

-She has no choice but to be black or white about her life and feelings and standing up for herself

-Back to The Archer- Kate doesn’t understand the point of “I’ve been the archer, I’ve been the prey”

-It’s kind of like I’ve been the attacker and I’ve been the victim, I’ve had the upper hand and I’ve had the lower hand, I’ve been the dumper and I’ve been dumped

-Kate thinks Taylor’s been on the attack and defense and she knows what it feels like to be treated the exact same way she treats people and therein lies the issue

-That’s a confusing thing to process in your head period and to communicate in a song is inevitably going to be a little bit frantic and convoluted but that's kind of the point. The anxiety of how you handle things and how you accept yourself despite the way you likely mishandle things

-Taylor starts out saying “I’m ready for combat” in the most reluctant, delicate voice that is not indicative of somebody ready for combat

-That sounds like somebody who is a reluctant participant in their own patterns and they don’t want to be doing it but they know they’re going to and they know they’ll do it again

-These patterns and issues that we have exhibit over and over the reason for self-loathing and it's almost harder when you’re older and can acknowledge that you do these things and they don’t work for you but I still do them anyway

-It’s that self awareness paired with the active participation in these bad habits that make a person really start to doubt themselves and in using figures of speech like “I cut off my nose just to spite my face”, like that cuts deep bc she's basically being like “I overreact and I know I do and on purpose”

-In acting out of anxiety and fear you often end up riding off alone

-At a point you see people come and go, you know how this whole song and dance goes, at a point you start to mourn it before it's over

-That’s kind of like “yeah I never figured out the best way to maintain these relationships and I’m tired of it, I never grew up, I don’t know why I am this way but since I know they come and go and since I’ve always ridden on the train alone that probably what I’ll do again but with your help, help me hold onto you… like I want you to be the exception”

-We all think of ourselves as a catch and a trainwreck and it’s not a bad thing

-Looking for someone’s flaws is something everyone does in relationships

-As it relates to in the past when she’s been burned by somebody’s dark side she wants to call it when she sees it and lock the door before she gets robbed but then there's the conflicting part where she’s like “well what I’m alright, what if I can trust you and I’m alright right here?”

-The entire song is kind of like a back and forth of opposing feelings

-To cut off your nose to spite your face is basically a metaphor for overreacting

-She brings up the Hiddleswift stunt and Taylor revealing that she was Nils Solberg for some reason (connecting it to the metaphor)

(KATE IS RAMBLING SO I’M ONLY ADDING IMPORTANT THINGS NOW)

-We’re so quick to discount people's feelings just because they're in a position of fame and fortune and power but I think we would all feel no less us with money if anything everything’s intensified

-Taylor must have to put up a front all the time because she's not allowed to complain or have bad days when that is your normal and any therapist will tell you you can only heal operating out of your own normal.

-Pain is pain and when you start to compare pain is when you start to trivialize, minimize and not work through what you’re going through and you start to avoid/ignore it

-Taylors in a weird position where she probably has a more internal struggle that anybody

-Through her music we should acknowledge and think about what it’s like on that side, we owe her the respect to be like damn.. this must be hard

-Talks about the “all the king's horses” line and Humpty Dumpty

-All of the resources and people trying to help Taylor at her disposal and they still can’t fix this and that is an empty feeling, like a lost cause

-When Kate hears ‘The Archer’ she hears a highly anxious episode that is not just processing the individual situation going on but then doing a thing where you project it on every single thing that's ever going to happen in your life

OK FIN.

[recentanimenews]

CR Features Argues About Anime of the Year!

Anime Awards voting end on Friday! We've been super pumped because of the community's reactions to the nominees. However we have gotten so loud with our individual opinions on who we think should win that we’ve been told to duke it out via written words instead of continually disrupting our coworkers (sorry fam).

  We've hit every category in the Anime Awards and this is the last installment in our argumentative saga. So we're gonna  get down to the nitty gritty of Best Film, Best Director, and finally ANIME OF THE YEAR. Let’s down to business!

Best Film

My Hero Academia: Two Heroes

This is admittedly the area where I feel least qualified to deliver a prediction, but I nonetheless feel very confident. Just based on box office it’s likely the one everyone has seen, so… Anyway, My Hero nailed its theatrical debut with an original story that felt plausible and made great use of the existing characters. All Might literally flexing on the villain is one of the greatest moments from the entire series only made possible by this film.

-Peter Fobian

The Night is Short, Walk On Girl

When I think of what constitutes an amazing film, I like to think of how the overall package leaves me feeling after I watch the whole thing. I usually want a film to leave me wanting more, but satisfied with the story I’ve been told, and for anime films, I want to see amazing, crisp visual storytelling tied to great voice acting and musical packages. For 2018, no film really left me feeling that way other than The Night is Short, Walk On Girl. The musical number alone was worth checking out the film for, and the movie also captured a lot of that joy of life style of film that usually gets talked about for college and early adulthood films.

-Nicole Mejias

My Hero Academia: Two Heroes

Before My Hero Academia: Two Heroes, I’d never been in a theater for an anime film that had such an excited audience. Usually there’s this reserved feeling of “Okay, we got this far. We’re seeing anime at an actual theater and if we play it cool, maybe this will happen again.” But thanks to the popularity of My Hero Academia and the growing appreciation for anime in America and I was faced with an audience that treated My Hero Academia: Two Heroes like a WWE show. There was so much cheering and love and when I left, I was just so happy to be an anime fan.

-Daniel Dockery

Liz and the Blue Bird

There isn’t any dialog for about the first ten minutes of Liz and the Blue Bird. It opens with one of the main characters’ footsteps ringing out into the air, and then a piano melody begins playing to the beat tapped out by her shoes. The music and imagery play off of one another in a way I’ve literally never seen in a movie before. It was so beautiful that the majority of the audience I saw it with was in tears LITERALLY BEFORE ANY CHARACTER SAID ANYTHING. This is truly the best possible movie Sound! Euphonium could have received. It’s one of the best anime experiences I’ve ever had, and I love it a lot.

-Cayla Coats

Best Director

Tatsuya Yoshihara for Black Clover

If a director is the champion of a production, I can’t think of anyone more deserving than Tatsuya Yoshihara. He’s gone above and beyond to make Black Clover a success and it’s really shone. Just following him on Twitter, you can see he lives this series and his extracurricular efforts to elevate the production are well known. His bringing in animators of all types and levels of experience to deliver the surreal experience of episode 63 is something I hope to see more regularly from Black Clover in the future.

-Peter Fobian

  Masaaki Yuasa for Devilman Crybaby

  Devilman Crybaby left me a blubbering mess by the end of it, and I hated Masaaki Yuasa for it. My only real exposure to Devilman came when I was younger and watching old VHS tapes of anime, and back then I just saw Devilman as this dark and action filled story; in Devilman Crybaby, Yuasa certainly didn’t shy away from those aspects, but he found a way to make the story even more tragic as the ending drew near. The blending of Science Saru’s visual style with Go Nagai’s manga, topped with the amazing soundtrack, is a package that could only really be created by someone with a keen eye.

-Nicole Mejias

  Akira Amemiya for SSSS. Gridman

  I’ve spent a ton of time over the last few months spreading the good word about SSSS. Gridman, but as my turn in the awards season comes to a close, I feel like I should give it one more parting compliment: The director, Akira Amemiya is awesome. Coming off of Inferno Cop and Kill la Kill, I think SSSS. Gridman, due to its subject matter, might be his best work yet. Even relatively static scenes between characters crackle with energy, and the battles are usually spectacular.

-Daniel Dockery

Norihiro Naganuma for The Ancient Magus’ Bride

How do you heal from something that has broken you completely? The Ancient Magus’ Bride seeks to answer that question. Chise’s journey to learn magic and undo the traumas of her past could have come off as tone deaf or emotionally exploitative in the wrong hands, but Naganuma’s earnest depiction of her struggles elevated this show into one of the most emotionally engaging anime I’ve ever seen. How do you heal from something that has broken you completely? Use your pain to connect to others.

-Cayla Coats

Anime of the Year

A Place Further Than the Universe

  A Place Further is an amazing production delivering one of the greatest and most original stories I’ve seen in years. From having zero source material and playing with the idea of a story about girl psychics, the staff somehow pulled together an airtight and thoroughly researched story with fantastic moments and intriguing character subplots. It was excellently paced, affirming, and I honestly can’t think of a single thing they could have done to improve it.

-Peter Fobian

  Hinamatsuri

This category was pretty tough to choose from, and in the end, I chose the brilliant Hinamatsuri. I went into this series knowing absolutely nothing other than it was a comedy. But underneath the comedy, the real strength of Hinamatsuri emerged as a story about people with real problems looking for connections. Despite Hina being a selfish brat, she’s also relatable, Nitta is somehow one of the best anime dads in memory, and I really had a hard time not crying at Anzu’s story of finding a family, losing them, and finding a new one. I loved Hinamatsuri from beginning to end, and can only hope that we may get another season of it!

-Nicole Mejias

  Devilman Crybaby

I haven’t talked a lot about Devilman Crybaby because 1) Everyone has been talking about Devilman Crybaby, and 2) I didn’t watch it until late in the year, and I didn’t want to be the guy to burst, Kool Aid Man-style, into conversations about Fall Anime and say “BUT DID YOU GUYS SEE DEVILMAN CRYBABY? HEY. HOLD ON. WHERE ARE YOU GOING?” I didn’t really get into anime until college, which means I missed the age where I would watch a Dragon Ball Z or a Berserk or anything else and think that it’s insanely, unflappably, almost perfectly rad. But watching Devilman Crybaby, I think, gave me the closest thing to that. This sense of “Oh, man. Anime really is the coolest thing in the world. Also, I need a Mountain Dew.”

-Daniel Dockery

A Place Further Than the Universe

This wasn’t the most visually beautiful anime of the year. It didn’t have the best music, the best character designs, or the best dialog. But Shirase’s journey to find her mother in a far off land transformed these parts into a truly amazing whole. Shirase, Mari, Hinata, and Yuzuki all feel like completely realized people and their journey to Antarctica is one of the finest examples of how anime can tell stories like no other medium can.

-Cayla Coats

Woo! So we hit every category, had a lot of fun writing this up, and have exhausted our physical and written voices concerning who we think should win for now. We can't wait to see who wins! 

  If you haven't voted for Anime Awards, you still have time! Voting ends this Friday and the place to see all of the nominees for every category and vote for your favorites is right here! 

  Who do you think should win: Best Film, Best Director, and Anime of the Year? Tell us in the comments below!

Ricky Soberano is a Features Editor, Script Writer, and Editorial Programming Coordinator for Crunchyroll. She’s the former Managing Editor of Brooklyn Magazine. You can follow her on Twitter @ramenslayricky.

Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a features story, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features!

By: news+feed@crunchyroll.com

[victoriasugden-blog1]

I know you are on hitaus, but I'd love your opinion on Emmerdale at the moment.

You know what, I am on hiatus so for me now is a great time to throw my unfiltered opinion out there into the cosmos and log off and not have to deal with it.

This is negative to the point where if you don’t like negative stuff don’t read it, seriously. You’ve been warned. Also, this is my opinion ya don’t have to agree with me.

Robron:

“No actual plot here,”

I’m going to say what I’ve been biting my tongue and not saying since the spoilers came out in fear of repercussions from the fandom. This “storyline” if you can even call it that, it’s more a “plot” is rubbish. It’s hands down in my “ED didn’t give a fuck about actually making an effort” notebook: alongside the kidnapping plot and many other plots in general cause let’s face it there’s been a lot.

This plot for me is fan-baiting at it’s finest, cause ya know it makes fucking no sense in the plot their currently in, wasn’t developed or given even an inch of actual depth or real meaning and ya know what you might be thinking “Laura wait for Monday,” but I’m allowed to think this way from what I’ve watched.

We had no build up, Aaron just “decided” he was gonna propose at least we got two scenes with him how lucky! We only got one of Robert who just “decided” he was gonna propose literally out of nowhere presuming because Aaron didn’t mind holding Seb I guess? That makes buckets of sense. I’m not the person who likes fluff for the sake of it and just welcomes it when it makes no sense to the plot.

And yeah Comedy plots aren’t my thing, but I could have enjoyed it if it was well plotted out and storylined correctly. I’m calling bullshit here, I’m calling bullshit on the whole thing cause IM has been bigging up this wedding for over a year and you’re telling me they didn’t have time to plot this out? For real????

Like I’m a simple gal, you wanna give me comedy, give me comedy but at least plot it out, storyline it correct, give me some development and make it believable and I’m happy. I’m not watching General Hospital, I have higher standards for Emmerdale.

That’s when for me it feels like rubbish, that’s when it feels like Emmerdale’s just like “meh we don’t have to try let’s just fan bait ‘em and they be happy!” And look if you are, good for you, this is my opinion no one here has to agree with me. For me, I go crazy when it’s a storyline they’ve clearly put no effort into and is just mindless fan baiting. Yeah, I’m not a fan.

Charity:

“It was meant to be important but what? 1.0″

Please tell me again how this storyline was originally meant to be the police force and their abuse of power? WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT STORYLINE? Because we’ve literally seen none of it.

It’s some fucking joke at this point, lbr half of Charity’s storyline was meant to be about how Bails was a cop/detective so no one fucking believed her? So why the hell aren’t we seeing that storyline? Yeah we’ve been hearing about the “trail” and we’ve had them send in DNA tests but like that’s it and it’s frankly I’m gonna say it again rubbish.

If this is about a cop and the way he abusive power, shouldn’t be we idk be seeing how the police are handling it? For me, that’s important to. If I was in Charity’s position watching this storyline, I still frankly wouldn’t want to come forward, not even an inch, because it wouldn’t have in any way made me feel like coming forward would bring me justice.

Maybe I gotta wait till the trail, but the way they’ve isolated her, more on the Vanity issue later, just feels unrealistic and takes away from a storyline that should be about her whole family supporting her.

For me, we haven’t really seen anything that highlights why a woman in these situations should come forward, and that’s the storyline Emmerdale was selling when they dubbed it “important” but like, am I shocked? No.

Charity & Ryan:

“We’re running around in circles”

I’m gonna start by saying: I like Ryan a lot, but do I think this storyline needed a “secret child?” the answer is flat at no. If anything I think it takes away from the storyline they were trying to tell above because it’s saying “don’t have a child that shares the coppers DNA well too bad your not gonna get justice!!” It’s also morphed into completely being about Ryan and Irene, and the real meat of Charity’s storyline which was meant at least I thought it was meant to be Bails seems to be forgotten and pushed back.

Apart from all that, they’ve decided to portray Irene as the one in the wrong, rather than Charity. I’m gonna be real here, Charity’s never been the mother of the year, she’s never gonna win an award. Noah didn’t even want to live with her at one point.

I’m sorry them portraying Charity as some a class mother is some a+ level bullshit right there. Of course, Irene is weary, this is her son, she’s  Ryan’s mother and she’s trying to protect him from the mess that is Charity. Don’t get me twisted, I do think if Ryan wants to know Charity then he should get that chance he’s a grown man, it’s his decision. But man framing her as some great mother is like nope I’m sorry I can’t handle that bullshit.

Last but not least, this storyline is going around in circles and is held hostage by Debbie’s storyline and like why??? “I’m gonna tell them! Nope wait I’m not” over and over again this is in my opinion badly passed. Here is Charity saying she wants to make a go of it with Ryan but doesn’t even get how fundamentally she’s hurting him by continuing to keep him a secret from his family after she promised to tell them.  

Ross:

“It was meant to be important but 2.0″

Ah Ross, don’t you just love it when acid is thrown in a character’s face and their somehow made to be the bad guy at the mercy of the character that ordered the attack on ya and ruined your life!

I’m not gonna go into too much depth because I think everyone knows how I feel about Ross’s storyline. It’s utter total garbage with no redeeming factors to it. They screwed over MP so hard he’ll be feeling it for years at this point. Like ouch.

I’d like to meet the person who thought this storyline was in anyway a good idea, not only has the person who threw acid been cleared, the person who paid that person has been pushed to the forefront, made to be the victim, and basically been told by pretty much everyone that what she’s done is pretty much “okay” cause it was an accident.

I get MP leaving screwed them over, but I don’t find that in any way a good excuse for not bothered to do a lick of research for this storyline. For not bothered to give a fuck about victims and turn it into a fucking circus show, where at the end of the day the victim comes off looking the worst.

Someone count how many times in those first few episodes they panned to Debbie’s face, and showed her crying. Someone count it for me because for the person who paid for the attack she’s shown a lot more she needed to be and by more I mean she didn’t need to be shown at all.

Joe:

“I’m a kind of Tate, but not really”

I don’t have much to say about Joe, purely because I have no fucking clue what they were thinking with this character, compared to what we’re actually seeing on screen. His entrance was strong, I imagine he was meant to be a villain before they decided to pair him with Debbie and pretty much ruin his character for me.

He literally got away with everything, including treating Debbie like a prostitute, living her and her kids homeless, sending Liv to prison and literally didn’t get punished for any of it…oh wait he jumped into a lake for a biscuit and almost died that was it.

Apart from his character given no depth, the reason for him being in Emmerdale in the first place was dropped. We shall never speak of it again apparently. They NEVER redeemed the character. They just cut off his balls and that was it.

Debbie & Joe:

“We’re a love story for the ages!! We promise..”

Remeber when I just said they cut of Joe’s balls, well your looking at what they cut them off for- for Joe to become a background character to Debbie’s plot. To pretty much “be totally in love with her” even though that wasn’t the plot. And for Emmerdale to push this couple even though they don’t really have chemistry because Debbie has chemistry with literally no one.

But don’t fret Emmerdale is gonna push it anyway, not let any character hate Joe / this couple for longer than 5 seconds and be completely tone deaf. So ya know there’s that: but it’s fine cause they’ve already ruined Debbie’s character for the foreseeable future to me.

Sarah:

“Side character”

Literally, her sl is for Debbie and Joe, why they recast an older actress is beyond me.

Graham:

“Tragic as they come”

There isn’t much to say about Graham, because he’s storyline hasn’t been fleshed out, it’s not developed and him getting a flashback episode is the most hilarious thing ever. Talk about giving a character with no substance a misery porn storyline and just expecting us to relate or feel bad for the character…another strike and a missing storyline.

Having one episode where Graham says he was an alcoholic and how he caused his pregnant wife to die and literally than not mention it again and stick in an affair with another boring character and then bring back his plot without actually giving it any attention or time.

Chaddy:

“It was meant to be important but 3.0″

Ah pro life, how are you, my old enemy? You don’t seem to ever be leaving Emmerdale. This storyline is filled with conations of how “weak” you are if you abort your child (and this is after the baby was announced to have a condition that won’t let her live more than a few hours after birth).

Guilt tripping parents who do by saying “we’re her parents don’t we owe it to her to try as hard a possible” FUCK YOU EMMERDALE, and basically making Chas an unbearable walking pro life advert, and basically shun the idea of giving her organs away even though that could have been a storyline that helped fuck tones of people.

This storyline features, no outside support, no support groups, no real-life experiences, the character basically shunning a woman who abort the pregnancy, and the actress actually saying “I did no research for this storyline” that’s right Lucy ACTUALLY SAID THAT. I mean they’ve made Paddy the better one in this storyline, like….. the horror.

And that was how they treated this storyline AFTER they announced the condition if we go into before that’s a whole other kettle of fish.

Tracy:

“I’m a savior, I’m gonna make it”

A breath of fresh air, literally she’s the only character to managed to escape this bullshit. Even though her sl was way too tied to Charity’s and I feel Amy deserved better. She was still given a well-paced storyline that worked gave her character the respect it deserved. My only qualm was that her abortion storyline was about David like fucking nope but at least she didn’t have to fucking carry that baby to term.

David & Maya:

“The bunny boiler one”

They came out of nowhere, won’t last long because Leyla is coming back and Maya is totally gonna be a bunny boiler. I don’t have much to say apart from damn Emmerdale you gave David this sl like 3 months after Leyla ax the character if ya have nothing left to do with him. Also, ax David causes his character is fucking gross.

Liam:

“Under the bus, we go”

Literally, nothing to say apart from the fact that they basically threw Liam’s character under the bus and brought him in for fucking David and like nope Emmerdale why? I’ve been wanting them to make Liam a regular for forever and they literally bring him in to throw in under the bus like what a waste of what could have been a really great character interaction.

Bob & Laurel:

“They hate us”

But their storyline is one of the only ones that actually had the only decently paced storyline, and was also storylined out well. Burn me at the stake.

Marlon and Jesse:

“They made no effort and stuck me with the chef”

I’m sorry I don’t like Marlon and Jesse, I think they don’t really have any chemistry. I think it’s a real shame because instead of spending months trying to push Jesse and Marlon together they could have fleshed out Jesse’s character and given her an actual storyline but nope!

They didn’t bother. Like think about it she’s been a regular for months and what do we actual know about the character? She had a good husband, she has a son and that’s it.

Matty:

“I’m undeveloped”

I like Matty as a character, so he’s entrance and storyline being underdeveloped and under fleshed tbh disappoints me. For me he’s storyline doesn’t feel that realistic, not that he’s trans or any of that stuff, it’s about how Moira took 3 episodes to just suddenly be okay and trying.

I know she’s beloved by the GA and they don’t want them to hate her for too long, but that was literally nothing, most parents who have a problem with it don’t come around in like a week. Not to mention Emmerdale is a conservative town, but everyone is suddenly okay with Matty after one meeting and for most their just automatically okay with it, it’s just not realistic.

Matty & Vic:

“Out of nowhere”

The thing is I could get behind Matty and Vic, but like it came out of nowhere and tbh Vic is still fucking wearing her ring to Adam and obviously still in love with him doesn’t even know he didn’t murder Emma and has been given no time to actually move on but I’m now meant to ship her with Adam’s bother? Ya, see my problem here? Yet another underdeveloped plot which seems to be the running theme.

And that’s it folks I’m out, have fun! This is my opinion, ya don’t have to agree with me!

[bthenoise]

Here’s The Best of 2019 As Picked By Members Of The Used, Periphery, Counterparts, Killswitch Engage, Grayscale & More

Well everyone, we did it. Somehow someway we all survived yet another 365 gloriously trying days on this place we call earth. In about two more weeks, we will officially begin a brand new decade with hopes of starting something beautiful and life-changing for the human race. Until then, we’d like to take a second to look back on some of the finer things that came out of 2019 – you know, like the best album, best song, best movie, etc.

Like we’ve done in years past, we’ve completely turned our year-end best-of list over to the artists we cover on a daily basis because let’s face it, their opinions are the ones we all really care about, right?

Right.

To check out what bands like The Used, Counterparts, Periphery, Killswitch Engage, Fit For A King, Grayscale, Atreyu, Wage War, Boston Manor and more have all been obsessing over for the past year or so, be sure to see below. We hope you enjoy this final list as much as we do and wish you all the most peaceful and positive holiday season ever.

Enjoy!

Jeph Howard and Dan Whitesides - The Used

JEPH HOWARD

Best Album of 2019: Sampa the Great - The Return And Knocked Loose - A Different Shade Of Blue

Best Song of 2019: “Blow Me” - from The Used and yes I’m biased.

Best Music Video of 2019: Wendall - “The Power of Wings”

Most Underrated Album of 2019: Sampa the Great - The Return. Her vibe reminds me of my favorite era of hip hop.

Best Movie of 2019: Dr. Sleep, great book too. Must have been tough rewriting the story just enough to mix both the book The Shining and the film adaptation Kubrick made and then making a movie based on both origins.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: The OA season 3. So unfair that never happened.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Epstein was an inside job and also the cat playing the cell phone ring tone 😂

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: HodgePodge Superfest 2019 Indonesia, mostly because I got to hang with a couple family friends I haven’t seen in years.  

2020 New Year's Resolution: For 2020 I want to worry less about things I have no control over.

DAN WHITESIDES

Best Album: The Knocked Loose album A Different Shade Of Blue is great and so fuckin heavy! On the other side of things, the Billie Eilish album is really good front to back. Saw her live in Salt Lake and it was pretty sick.

Best Song: Honestly, it’s “Blow Me” by my band The Used. I’m not just saying that because it’s my band. It’s a great fucking song and it has all of my favorite elements in it.

Best Music Video: Blink 182’s “Darkside.” Love the stick tricks and the dancing kids.

Most Underrated Album: All the albums I liked in 2019, I rated them pretty high.

Best Movie: Dumb and Dumber has been the best movie every year since it came out. All the kids movies that came out in 2019 were good. I see them all. I didn’t really like The Addams Family though.  

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Atypical and Fuller House and I’m not fucking with you. I laugh out loud at Fernando every time!

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): When the deaf baby hears for the first time. I almost cried but I couldn’t because I’m a man and men don’t cry. Just playin! I did tear up a weeee bit.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Saw Rob Zombie and damn he puts on a great show. Back To The Beach was my favorite show I played in 2019. We did a cover of Linkin Park’s “Shadow Of The Day” at that show and it started raining. People were crying. It was nuts!

2020 New Year's Resolution:  I don’t really do resolutions but I wish people could just get along despite their beliefs. Life is too short.

Misha Mansoor - Periphery

Best Album of 2019: Mordial by Carbomb Best Song of 2019: “F it Up” by Louis Cole Best Music Video of 2019: “Genesis” by Devin Townsend Most Underrated Album of 2019: Forever, A Fast Life by Infinity Shred Best Movie of 2019: Jojo Rabbit Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Barry Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Gamer Girl Bath Water Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019:  Attended - Deadmau5 Cube V3.  Played - Sold Out London headliner at O2 Kentish Town 2020 New Year's Resolution: Drive more cars

Brendan Murphy - Counterparts

Best Album of 2019: Better Off - Reap What You Sow. Luke is probably the best songwriter I know personally. The album is an absolute fucking hit. I literally begged him to send me the masters before the album came out and I’ve listened to it non-stop since. Was hard to keep that album a secret. 

Best Song of 2019: Gotta go with what my Spotify wrapped tells me and aside from the 1975’s discography, my most listened to song of 2019 was “Slingshot” by Better Off. The song is amazing, the lyrics rock, chorus is fucking huge. Like I said, Luke can’t write a bad song. 

Best Music Video of 2019: I’ll be honest, it’s rare for me to watch any music video that doesn’t have the 1975 in it so I’m gonna go ahead and pick their video for “Frail State of Mind” because... I mean look at him, he’s so cool. If we could get away with making videos like that I might actually not dread shooting them haha. 

Most Underrated Album of 2019: BETTER OFF, YET AGAIN. ARE YOU SURPRISED? I don’t understand how they aren’t the biggest band on earth. 

Best Movie of 2019: Midsommar. I’m a total A24/Ari Aster fanboy and I love movies about freaky cults and this movie ticks all the boxes. It’s not as much of a “deep dive” as Hereditary, very surface level, but I mean it’s creepy and it’s shot beautifully and there’s flowers everywhere and in case you forgot I sing for Counterparts so it’s right up my fuckin alley haha. 

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Barry without question. Blake made me watch an episode when we were recording NLTL and I binged watched the show so hard I’d be up all night watching when I was supposed to be writing lyrics. Last time I was physically unable to stop watching a show was Lost, so that should say something. 

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): My own twitter hun xox 😘

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: I mean it’s hard to remember our shows because not only are they all fun, I’ve usually had a few chardonnays by the time we go on stage BUT one that stands out is the last day of Private Room 2.0 in Worcester... simply because for all of “Love Me” I didn’t have to say a fucking word, the crowd did the whole damn thing. I think there’s a video where I get so stoked I start screaming “YOU’RE GOD DAMN RIGHT” and jumping. It’s fun and honestly, it’s 10 fucking words don’t make me do it by myself. 

2020 New Year's Resolution: Stop accidentally calling my teacher “mom.”

Mike D'Antonio - Killswitch Engage

Best Album of 2019: He Is Legend - White Bat Best Song of 2019: He Is Legend - “Resister Resist Her” Best Music Video of 2019: Death Ray Vision “Just Let It Die” Most Underrated Album of 2019: He Is Legend - White Bat Best Movie of 2019: Joker Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: The Mandalorian Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Yoda/Toyota meme Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Field Day played in Connecticut a few months back. 2020 New Year's Resolution: Refuse the new world order

Porter McKnight - Atreyu

Best Album of 2019: Angel Du$t - Pretty Buff Best Song of 2019: “The Dead Don’t Die” - Sturgill Simpson Best Music Video of 2019: Rammstein - “Deutschland” Most Underrated Album of 2019: The Act - The Devil Wears Prada Best Movie of 2019: Midsommar Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Watchmen Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Paul Rudd “Look at us” on Hot Ones Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019:  Attended - Nothing More - New Orleans March 2019 Played - Mr’s Smalls Theatre - Millvale, PA  2020 New Year's Resolution: Establish a consistent physical art practice

Ryan Kirby - Fit For A King

Best Album of 2019: Just for the purpose of nostalgia, I am going to go with Shaped by Fire by As I Lay Dying. It doesn't re-invent the wheel but it's just some good ole metalcore that brings me back. 

Best Song of 2019: I absolutely cannot stop listening to "Masochist" by Polaris. This band is going to be huge!

Best Music Video of 2019: I feel like I have to say our own video for "When Everything Means Nothing" is the best strictly because we all almost died of hypothermia while getting sprayed by a fire hose.  

Most Underrated Album of 2019: I think The Valley by Whitechapel doesn't get talked about near as much as it should. Phil's cleans are fantastic and they keep bringing the heavy. 

Best Movie of 2019: I feel like this will be a lot of people's favorite movie but The Joker was an absolute masterpiece.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: This one is EASILY The Boys. It might be the most well-done superhero show OR movie ever made. Once you watch the first episode, you are sucked in.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): This one is really tough because at this point, I don't even know which meme is from what year. I guess I'll go with Baby Yoda since I know that’s 2019 but with a disclaimer: There are a lot of NOT funny Baby Yoda memes out there.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: The show in Cologne, Germany with As I Lay Dying was the biggest club show we had ever played, and at the same time, probably one of the best live performances I've ever seen. Amazing night.

2020 New Year's Resolution: I want to be able to run a half marathon with my dad. It’s pretty simple but he is out here running full marathons all the time and is double my age. I feel like I need to step it up.

Valentino Arteaga - Of Mice & Men

Best Album of 2019: Gideon - Out Of Control Best Song of 2019: Kublai Khan TX - “Self Destruct” Best Music Video of 2019: Ghostemane - “Bonesaw” Most Underrated Album of 2019: Ithaca - The Language of Injury Best Movie of 2019: Yesterday Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Cold Case Files Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Spotify Wrapped 2019 Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Wacken Open Air Festival 2020 New Year's Resolution: Eat less meat & make more music

Matty Mullins - Memphis May Fire

Best Album of 2019: Dermot Kennedy - Without Fear Best Song of 2019: Papa Roach - “Feel Like Home” Best Music Video of 2019: Asking Alexandria - “The Violence” Most Underrated Album of 2019: He Is Legend - White Bat Best Movie of 2019: Yesterday Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: This Is Us Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): @catatonicyouths IG Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Warped Tour in Atlantic City was LEGENDARY! 2020 New Year's Resolution: Write the best MMF record of our career

Nick Ventimiglia - Grayscale

Best Album of 2019: tryhard by The Band Camino and Fear Inoculum by Tool Best Song of 2019: "No Age" by Rich People Best Music Video of 2019: "Mantra" by Bring Me the Horizon was pretty wild Most Underrated Album of 2019: Third Eye Blind - Screamer Best Movie of 2019: Big fans of Us and The Irishman Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Peaky Blinders and Mindhunter Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Big fan of the Kawhi Leonard “Hey, hey, hey” memes. Really anything but that lady yelling at that fucking cat. Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Our headliner in Philly this past October at The TLA.  2020 New Year's Resolution: Rock harder than we did in 2019.

Cody Quistad - Wage War

Best Album of 2019: tryhard by The Band Camino Best Song of 2019: “See Through” by The Band Camino Best Music Video of 2019: “Resentment” by A Day To Remember Most Underrated Album of 2019: In Darkness by Varials Best Movie of 2019: Peanut Butter Falcon The Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: The Office, duh Favorite Internet Moment of 2019: The Epstein memes kill me Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Can’t Say I Ain’t Country Tour: Florida Georgia Line, Dan + Shay, Morgan Wallen 2020 New Year’s Resolution: Write the best songs I’ve ever written, love on more people, and be healthier 

Boston Manor

Best Album of 2019: Death Is A Warm Blanket by Microwave. This record is the best guitar music to come out in years. As our contemporaries, Microwave is constantly challenging and inspiring us to make better art.

Best Song of 2019: “The Brakeman Has Resigned” by Microwave. This song could not be more relevant to us, both instrumentally and lyrically. It’s just fuckin’ perfect.

Best Music Video of 2019: “DIAWB” by Microwave. You get the point.

Most Underrated Album of 2019: Foreign Language EP by Can’t Swim. Always love to see friends changing up their riff game.

Best Movie of 2019: The Irishmen. I’ve watched it like three times in the van now and can’t choose which Tony is my favourite.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Rick and Morty. You son of a bitch, I’m in.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Eric Egan from Heart Attack Man.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Best concert we played would have to be Download Madrid. Right off the heels of ADTR in America, the airline lost our gear so we had to cobble together a backline and ended up playing after Tool to an insane amount of people.

2020 New Year's Resolution: Continue our world domination.

Mike Foley - Varials

Best Album of 2019: Feels Like You by Whirr Best Song of 2019: "Nothing Left To Love" by Counterparts Best Music Video of 2019: Tie between "Lips Like Lemonade" by Nick Prosper & "Mistakes Like Fractures" by Knocked Loose. Most Underrated Album of 2019: Deceiver by Diiv Best Movie of 2019: Joker Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: I Think You Should Leave Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Kombucha girl Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: The best show I attended was definitely the Balance & Composure farewell show in NYC. RIP. Best played was definitely the Atlantic City Warped Tour date. Also RIP. 2020 New Year's Resolution: Tour more internationally / spend as much time traveling as possible. Really hoping we make it to 3 different continents this year.

Kory Gregory - Prince Daddy & The Hyena

Best Album of 2019: Remembering The Rockets - Strange Ranger Best Song of 2019: “Mono No Aware” - Great Grandpa Best Music Video of 2019: “Must Be Wrong” - White Reaper Most Underrated Album of 2019: Super Enthusiast - Macseal Best Movie of 2019: Parasite Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Been really enjoying Mandalorian Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Baby Yoda forever and always. No questions asked. Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Our record release show in NYC was really special! That’s my favorite one I played. As far as the ones I attended, this Culture Abuse/Tony Molina show I went to in Boston was pretty legendary. 2020 New Year's Resolution: I just wanna keep writing songs that are better than the last!

Yvette Young - Covet

Best Album of 2019: The Japanese House - Good At Falling Best Song of 2019: “Shrugging Match” - Bobbing Best Music Video of 2019: Don Broco - “Action” Most Underrated Album of 2019: Town Portal - Of Violence Best Movie of 2019: Midsommar Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: I Think You Should Leave Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Discovering bandmemes666, Chibson, catatonicyouths and allgasnobrakes on IG Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Orlando summer headliner show at The Soundbar 2020 New Year's Resolution: Make a dope full-length album

Carter Hardin - Chapel 

Best Album of 2019: Album of the year for me is KIN by Electric Guest. Every song is a bop and the production is so clean.

Best Song of 2019: I would have to say “Friends” by CHAPEL. The band is pretty cool and the song is a slapper.

Best Music Video of 2019: “Panini” by Lil Nas X is mine. It’s the most memorable one I’ve seen this year.

Most Underrated Album of 2019: Pep Talks - Judah & The Lion. Not enough people are talking about that record.

Best Movie of 2019: MARRIAGE STORY. This movie broke me & I can’t stop thinking about it.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Fleabag is amazing. you need to watch it.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Baby Yoda memes are the best memes in the world.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: I saw Cherub recently and they always put on the best show. This recent one was super inspiring.

2020 New Year's Resolution: Release more music

Alex Biro - Selfish Things

Best Album: The Act by The Devil Wears Prada. Genre-defying and innovative, this was one of my favourite albums of the last decade. I’ve been a TDWP fan since Zombie EP but the growth they’ve shown on their latest release while still staying true to their roots was sonically refreshing.  

Best Song: “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X. This speaks for itself. I’ve never been one to shy away from popular music, but it’s Lil Nas X’s “love everyone but fuck everyone” attitude that kind of impresses me most? He’s punk as hell. He breaks stereotypes. He pissed off 90% of the country music industry. I hope he continues to succeed.

Best Music Video: “bury a friend” by Billie Eilish. I mean, it’s been Billie’s year. We all know that. But the whole “monster under your bed” motif coupled with her wanting to not shy away from the dark side of things in a genre filled to the brim with bubblegum songs and visuals speaks to her innovation as a creative and an artist.

Most Underrated Album of 2019: Everyone I’ve Ever Loved by Valleyheart. This came out a week and a half before 2019 but I’m including it here. “Agnosia” is one of the best songs I’ve heard in years. This band is fucking amazing. Don’t sleep on them. They deserve better than they’ve been given.

Best Movie of 2019: Peanut Butter Falcon. Shia LaBeouf is a true artist, and he’s at the peak of his game here. If you’re a fan of Garden State, The Grand Budapest Hotel, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Rocket Science or any other emotionally devastating indie films, this is a movie for you.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: The Simpsons. God bless you Disney+. I can’t even put into words how nice it is to watch all of my old favourites with my daughter. Treehouse of Horror forever.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Colton jumping the fence during The Bachelor. We admittedly got snowed in during the “snow cyclone” in Wyoming and binged this whole season. I’ve never been more disappointed. Still impressed by his agility, though.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Atlanta, GA w/ Microwave, Boston Manor and Heart Attack Man. We’ve never had that many kids over the barricade. It was one of those “wow, maybe our band isn’t totally shit” moments. We all got off stage and knew it was one to remember. I’ll never forget it. 

2020 New Year's Resolution: Learn to be happy with who I am without letting the toxicity of social media cloud my self-perception.

Ryan Donovan - Red City Radio

Best Album of 2019: Mannequin Pussy - Patience. "Who You Are" & "Drunk II" are some standout tracks on that record for me! It's just filled with melodic anthems that have killer soft harmonies and is kind of a technically ambitious record compared to their older stuff, which I also love!

Best Song of 2019: The Menzingers - "America (You're Freaking Me Out)." They fucking NAILED it with this track and our current climate in the US, socially/politically/economically etc. They seamlessly always write some killer tunes!

Best Music Video of 2019: PUP - "Free At Last." No one had heard the song yet. They posted the lyrics and chord chart to the song and took all submissions of everyone's interpretation of the song and edited that down. You just gotta watch it for yourself, IT FUCKING RULES. Most Underrated Album of 2019: Decent Criminal - BLISS. I love this band and their tunes/sound. Small indy label release and I hope they take some more strides forward and keep growing. They rip.

Best Movie of 2019: Favorite movie I have personally seen so far this year is Once Upon A Time In Hollywood. I heard it was a lot of either "love it" or "hated it" kind of reviews but I personally thought it was a killer film.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Ah man, with so much time on the road touring this year for RCR binge-watching older shows was a lot of my downtime when I got back home so here are some favs: Admittedly I had never seen Breaking Bad, that has now been binged and completed. Game Of Thrones (hadn't seen it until this Summer, I know, I know whatever). Animal Kingdom, Succession, Punisher, Jessica Jones and I Think You Should Leave.  

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): I LOVE THIS MEME and I do love pizza.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Probably the last show of our short tour with Hot Water Music over in Cologne, Germany. It was the largest capacity venue show we have ever played as a band - that wasn't a festival - at 4k humans, sold out! It was also extra special because Rockpalast had a 10+ human camera crew on hand and filmed the whole thing with live edits as it was streamed for anyone to tune in and watch. The edits and camera/audio/streaming quality was A+!!!

2020 New Year's Resolution: Better self-care.

Brett Boland - Astronoid

Best Album of 2019: HEALTH - VOL. 4 :: SLAVES OF FEAR Best Song of 2019: Dinosaur Pile-Up - Thrash Metal Cassette Best Music Video of 2019: Billie Eilish - “bury a friend” Most Underrated Album of 2019: Nightmare Scenario - Beyond What is Real Best Movie of 2019: Midsommar Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Succession Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Sonic The Hedgehog Movie debacle. Best Concert You Attended: Final Slayer show in MA Best Concert You Played in 2019: Exit 111 2020 New Year's Resolution: PUT OUT MORE MUSIC

Conversation

Best Album of 2019: Copeland - Blushing. I’ve been a huge fan of this band for years and years and years; to say that they shaped my songwriting is an understatement. I was lucky enough to catch Copeland for the first time on this tour and it was a truly tectonic moment for me. Blushing was a perfect step for this band in terms of tone, emotional maturity and instrumental creativity. I was just so happy to hear every single song.

Best Song of 2019: “Make It Better” by Anderson Paak. This track just puts you in a good mood!!

Best Music Video of 2019: Our music video for “You’ve Made Yourself Perfectly Clear” where we accurately and tastefully re-created the opening scene of Wayne’s World to perfection. I know it seems like a bit of a brag to say you had the best video of the year, but truth be told, nothing else even came close.

Best Movie of 2019: Joker - I’m sure this will be a pretty common response but IT WAS INCREDIBLE!!

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Letterkenny - A hilarious show about small-town Canada. If you don’t know, now you know.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Jonathan Frakes Asking Questions.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019:  A close tie between Arkells at Scotiabank Arena and Barr Brothers at Mod Club

2020 New Year's Resolution: To tour all of the USA and Europe for our new record. We are all so excited for the new music that we’re about to put out into the world and our undying dream is to show our live show to the entire world. SO THAT’S WHAT WE’RE DOING!!!

[undercovermcdfan]

re: this wack ass argument

Hello @brighter-than-a-wildfire , 

I’d like to formally begin where the hell are you stepping off of. I try to go about this without bringing my own biases and experience related to issue at hand– which is, to anybody reading, Garroth’s status of a xenophobe in person presents to me: My assertion that Garroth being showing xenophobic behaviors– which is intended by the writers to be interpreted as so– is a form of me performing victim blaming towards Garroth. You can read the argument untouched and in the way this person sent it here: link 

this is gonna be a wild ride, so buckle up folks, I’m breaking down this example of an apologist and trying to downplay my points with their attempts of “explaining” a phobia I’m very familiar with. 

So you give an apology in the first message, which I’d like to address: 

I’m going to start with an admission and an apology, Garroth actually does fit the xenophobe profile but definitely not for the reasons you probably think. [..] I also apologize for my poor wording, I was angry and did not get my point across clearly for any misunderstandings.

Which normally, I’d appreciate this if it didn’t sound so back-handed. Essentially, wrong foot– just because you say an apology but give zero sentiment in learning or really caring for what you’re apologizing for, this really leaves me in a case of holding my hands out like “uh… what the fuck dude.”

Apologizing for poor wording yet going back and doubling down on what you said– man, if you called that angry writing, this wasn’t a step above? In fact, the rambles you put in that 8 reply piece you spammed me with highlighted yourself in a much more sinister way than you might’ve liked my dude. I originally regarded you a hopped up fan defending Garroth. Congrats, you leveled into something way more disliked by me. 

What kills me about this, is your goddamn arrogance. Example, here’s some of your phrasing towards me: 

but definitely not for the reasons you probably think.

Before I properly get into this, let’s do an examination of phobias. Now, most phobias come from some sort of traumatic experience or a belief, i.e.

I just really have a problem when it seems like people are demonizing trauma victims.

I’m not new to this. Trying to explain a topic I shown to understand completely well, but to fill up the space and fluff up your argument, you still go in and try to explain what you think phobias are and what you think Garroth’s actual ‘phobia’ is. Making it sound so medical, with such a disconnect, honestly was I surprised when you admitted this perfect little gem?

[…] but I also understand Garroths point of view, because to be honest, I’ve been in a similar situation. 

Was this a case of bad wording? Or as the weirdly… specific example you given sheds light of your own beliefs: 

i.e. You may be afraid of spiders because one Sunday at a potluck you found a spider on your leg and it bit you, or you might be afraid of people from Mexico because your dad told you that they’re bad people who drink white peoples blood or some shit. 

Should I comment how you compared a rather normal and human fear of a spider to hey let me say I’m afraid of an entire group of people because they’re from X place, despite the fact this belief is irrational and wildly disheartening to even think somebody might say. 

It’s… way to specific. Like I’m not the only one, right? 

I feel like there’s some shit you personally gotta unpack instead of info dumping on me. 

Also the irrellevant and irrational argument to gander some weak ass sympathy for mister whitey tighty Garroth. I enjoy his character, he’s dynamic and I’m fucking thrilled Jess took the gamble, doubling down on Garroth’s unpleasantness! Because, newflash, it’s not a new thing– he treated a good number of character poorly and if you been a little more clever, you could’ve went the angle of “Garroth was just fishing for a reason to hate Liochant, just like how he fished when Laurance or Dante were introduced.”

But no. 

You went extremely tone-deaf and a very very… weak defense, I feel, partially to save face maybe? Embarrassed, possibly. You did admit you acted in anger the first time and don’t think I haven’t noticed you changed your URL– probably for a completely different reason. Maybe you might change it again. 

Let’s break this next part down– picking apart your biases as well, I think it’s time to bring out my own since I’m trying to snuff out this wacky fire you’re starting.

His home was taken over by Tu’la, his parents were captured and scheduled to be executed, and his father wasn’t recovered which caused his little brother who he had already lost to go looking for their father, and Garroths hasn’t heard from Vylad since so it’s entirely possible to Garroth that he’s dead. Now, here comes a refugee from Tu’la, the very place that did all those things, who says that he wants to be a guard.

That bolded part– I’m not sure where? You got that from? Whether this could chalk up to Garroth’s shittiness for not thinking that deeply for the youngest Ro’meave or– which is more likely– he knows and has a way to communicate with Vylad, Vylad is just mf chilling in Tu’la with this half ass attempt to find the Shit Lord named Garte. 

But the gall, the goddamn gall of you to twist this fact around and use it as “Well now look at Lio oooh he has to be suspicious.”

MY DUDE. 

First episode, Liochant is introduced as a character who been around for a while– he isn’t fresh faced. He’s part of Katelyn’s version of Jury of 9, he went through he guard academy and if not that, Katelyn vouched for Liochant multiple of times. 

Technically, Liochant outranks Garroth when it comes the job as a guard because the Dragonward is seen the best of the best. And let me tell you something about Wonderbread over here– remember the conversation Garroth tried with Katelyn, asking her if Liochant being part of it was a good idea. 

Deadass. Garroth a goddamn snake. We are given, quite blatantly, Garroth’s reason of Lio’s suspicion. Wasn’t his character, Lio never gave Garroth to doubt him but Garroth knowing he’s from Tu’la?

“He must be one bad hombre.” 

 ALSO HEY. MY DUDE. SEPARATE RACIAL BIAS AND XENOPHOBIC BIAS. Because I never said Garroth dislike other races. Tu’la is shown to have multiple races residing in it– Garroth dislike people from Tu’la. He never really shown screen time with KC, so honestly IDK on that dynamic. But I do have something I agree with you: 

[…]think that Garroth did try to disguise his hostility at first, but we all know how good Garroth is at subtly.

But you take it “aw shucks he’s not that bad.” I take it as same old shit. Let me spell something out for you that I mentioned before– this shit, this xenophobia? This is part of my life as an American citizen who’s parents are immigrants. People who can act somewhat polite but their actions convey they still fucking hate you. Why? It’s not for who you are, but where you from and their own ignorance, they fear you. 

Garroth is mad ignorant. 

Only when he’s forced to get to know Liochant, he starts acting like he isn’t bad but if given the opportunity? Man, we’d probably see this shit until Liochant snaps (which leads into a can of worms of oh no Garroth’s fears are realized). 

Garroth’s ass is so ignorant, Liochant makes a meal and he straight up disrespects him. 

Anyways, I’m getting tired at reveling in your own ignorance. But hey, one thing quick: 

He’s a human that makes mistakes, and I don’t think those mistakes should condemn him forever. I just really have a problem when it seems like people are demonizing trauma victims.

Garroth ain’t no trauma victim but let’s say, he is. Deadass, get off of tumblr because people are still responsible what they fucking say or do to others. And take that damn lesson to heart, because I see how you’re projecting your own thoughts on to Garroth and trying to make yourself feel better. 

You can understand the how but the how doesn’t justified the results.

And you wanna know the results?

Garroth is an xenophobic prick.

[wbwest]

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West Week Ever: Pop Culture In Review - 4/7/17

  So, last night I became the last person in America to see Get Out. As I joked on Twitter, I’m totally getting a divorce now. No, I kid, I kid. Like everyone said, it’s really good, though it may be a tad overrated. Just a tad. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, Get Out is the story of Black man Chris Williams who joins his White girlfriend Rose Armitage on a visit to her parents’ home for the weekend. And then crazy shit starts to happen. I can see what the appeal of the film is. I really can. But I’ve got to level with you: this movie hit a little too close to home. Yeah, I know that one Black reader I have is like “That’s what you get for datin’ them White girls!” No, seriously, I probably would’ve ended up just like Chris. First of all, I have a thing for Allison Williams. Even as bitchy, self-centered Marnie on Girls, I still have a thing for her. When her father fell from grace, I just wanted to tell her everything would be all right. So I would’ve taken the bait. In addition to that, I’ve dated that kind of family. Yes, in those cases, you’re dating the whole family. They had the same socioeconomic status as the Armitages, their friends were the same way, with the same weird questions. Sometimes you don’t realize how Black you are until that’s ALL you are to some folks. What some folks saw as just fun entertainment is something that I kinda lived. They’d do weird shit, where I felt like they were testing me. I remember the first time I went to stay for the weekend, they put me in a room with, like, three Rolexes just laying about like they were nothing. No, I don’t think they would’ve killed me, but I can totally see how something like this could happen. Meanwhile, I’m here thinking that I need to get me a friend as good as TSA Rod. I’ve got a lot to unpack from that movie right now. I’d love to have a conversation with Jordan Peele, ’cause that movie came from a place of experience. I wonder if I’d ever see it again, or if it’s like Bamboozled, where it’s just gonna make me hate White people for a while. Naw, I can’t hate y’all. You’re the only ones who read my site!

In movie news, it was reported that Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg are set to produce a film based on the Image comic Invincible. I used to read the series back when I worked at Diamond and got the hardcovers for free, and I really loved it. It follows Mark Grayson, who’s half human and half Viltrumite. His father, who’s full Vultrimite, is the hero known as Omni-Man, and Mark seems to have inherited a lot of his powers. Mark becomes the hero Invincible and a bunch of other stuff happens. Hey, what do you want from me? I only read the first 48 issues, and that was, like, 7 years ago. The thing I like about the series is that Mark is allowed to grow and change. People die and stay dead. In comics, there’s always the approach where they give the semblance of change without actual change, but that’s not how Invincible works. I mean, he’s currently married with a kid, and they haven’t resorted to having the Devil erase it all, unlike some heroes… Anyway, I like the idea of a movie, but I don’t know if Rogen and Goldberg are the guys to do it. After all, they’re the team behind AMC’s Preacher – a show that I’ve yet to really hear anything good about. Mainly, I heard season one was just boring. So, I guess we’ll just have to see what they bring to the table.

In other movie news, Scarlett Johansson’s live action Ghost In The Shell adaptation bombed, and the congregation rejoiced. There was a lot of controversy surrounding the film because it was felt that the main character, played by Johansson, was whitewashed. They felt she should’ve been portrayed by an Asian actress, and even the studio is now saying the movie failed to meet expectations due to the whitewashing controversy. I’m really not educated enough to weigh in on this one. I mean, I’d always heard that Japanese identity politics went a little deeper than we might think, which is why their cartoon characters always have blue hair and shit, but never really look Asian. But again, before I say something uninformed, I’m gonna bow out of this one. For a better understanding of the controversy, check out my friend Jenn’s post on the film.

Speaking of outrage, there was a Pepsi commercial that ruffled some feathers this week. I’d post the video, but Pepsi is trying to scrub all reference to the thing. In it, Kendall Jenner breaks away from a fashion shoot to join a peaceful protest, capping it off by offering a stern looking cop a Pepsi. He accepts, takes a swig, and everyone rejoices. The problem, however, is that the ad was kind of tone deaf. It seemed to trivialize the act of protesting, and to add insult to injury, it installed a pretty White girl as the face of the protest. Now, I saw the thing, and it was hamfisted, but I’m not sure it was worth all the threaded tweets and thinkpieces that it generated. Like, I get why folks didn’t like it, but I’m not sure I’m “woke” enough to see the whole matter. Anyone wanna weigh in on this one?

In television news, Disney Channel officially ordered Raven’s Home to series. Serving as the sequel to That’s So Raven, it features Raven Symone reprising her role as Raven Baxter, only now she’s the divorced mom of twin tweens. She also lives with her best friend, Chelsea, who’s ALSO a divorced single mom. Things start to get crazy, though, when Raven’s kids start to exhibit her psychic powers. See, that was always my thing with that show. Sure, I was too old for it when it was a hit, but I love a good tween TV show. That said, I feel like Raven and her friends could’ve had zany adventures without the whole psychic powers gimmick. I mean, the kids of iCarly didn’t need superpowers in order to be entertaining. The psychic stuff made it too much like a mystical tween Three’s Company which, on paper, sounds perfect, but isn’t that great in execution. Anyway, I just typed all this to justify posting a pic of costar Anneliese Van Der Pol. This whole thing just sounds like Fuller House with powers. I’ve got no nostalgia for the original show, so I doubt I’ll be checking this out.

In other TV news, Freeform has ordered New Warriors to series, featuring fan favorite character Squirrel Girl. I’ve got to admit that I know next to nothing about that character except that she was the nanny to Jessica Jones and Luke Cage’s daughter, Dani. I know she was a Great Lakes Avenger, but she was never a New Warrior. Still, they’ve been trying to find a vehicle for that character FOREVER, so I guess they finally figured it out. Based on how WB/DC has handled Powerless, I’m not too eager to see another comedy set in a comic book universe. The one bright spot in the whole thing is that Kevin Biegel is rumored to be the showrunner. Not only does he follow me on Twitter, but he’s the creator of the Fox series Enlisted (which I loved), and he co-created Cougar Town. Knowing that, I think the show is in good hands. I still feel weird about being a 35 year old man watching Freeform. It’s like you’re paying for The CW. The news, however, makes me sad that The Middle is still going. If you didn’t know, a few years ago, when it looked like the writing was on that wall for that show, Eden Sher had a meeting with Marvel. While we don’t really know what was discussed, her name was thrown around in the same discussions of Squirrel Girl. With The Middle already renewed for next season, though, that takes her out of the running. Sucks because I think Sher’s perky, Sue Heck personality would be perfect for Squirrel Girl.

Things You Might Have Missed This Week

Barry Manilow came out as gay, which makes me realize that he’s actually been singing about Man D all these years…

Speaking of gay, on Doctor Who it was revealed that The Doctor’s latest female companion, Bill, is gay. I mean, her name is “Bill”, so, surprise?

NBC ordered 2 additional episodes of the Will & Grace revival, bringing the total up to 12.

Also in the Department of Things We Don’t Need, there are apparently outlines for 14 more Transformers movies

I’ve written about my love of The Undertaker a few times here on the site. Basically, he’s a relic of a bygone era in professional wrestling – an era of kayfabe, when enemies wouldn’t fly on the same planes together, or be seen hanging out together at IHOP. He’s from a time when people had flashy names and in-ring gimmicks to set them apart. The industry has changed a lot since then, but you could always depend on Taker. If I were to be a professional wrestler tomorrow, my in-ring name would be Bruce Williamson. That’s how they do it now. Other business ventures came along, like Total Divas, which even further blurred the lines between real and fake, but you could always depend on Taker.

In recent years, he’s basically been a part-timer. Ever since The Streak was broken, there wasn’t really much need for him to be around. The mystique was kind of gone by that point. But, like clockwork, he still showed up to Wrestlemania and did his job. In my heart, I knew the end was near. I’d always said that, given some advance warning, I’d even try to attend his final show. He means that much to me. Well, I didn’t even get to watch his final appearance, which was last Sunday at Wrestlemania 33. The card looked weak, and I felt I had better shit to do. Little did I realize I’d be missing history in the making. The Undertaker jobbed to Roman Reigns, narrowly missing out on his 100th pay per view victory. While the rumors of retirement had been floating for years, no one was ready for what would happen next. He donned his signature coat, gloves, and hat, and took one last look at the crowd. Then, he removed them, placed them in a pile in the center of the ring, and walked away. He kissed his wife, pretty much breaking character, and proceeded to walk up the ramp, where he was lowered until he disappeared. As the crew dismantled the ring, they refused to move his belongings – a gesture of respect to the man who brought us all nearly 30 years of entertainment. I hate that I wasn’t there, but I especially hate that I didn’t even watch it. Sure, in this technological age we can always find what we’re looking for, but I feel like I let him down. He doesn’t know me, doesn’t give a shit about me, but I know him, and I thank him. So, with that in mind, Mark Calaway, AKA The Undertaker had the West Week Ever.