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laedback-taurus · 3 years ago

Text

Just a Cut

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Fem!Reader Word Count: 2k A/n: Thank you so much for over 200 notes on my last two stories! I actually quite enjoyed writing this piece.

You think you've ruined any chance you might have had with your boss but when you get hurt and he patches you up, you discover just how he really feels.

Falling in love with your boss was incredibly cliché, you knew this but of course it didn’t stop you developing feelings for the Shelby man. He had lost his wife sometime ago, leaving him and his son, Charlie behind, realising he couldn’t raise his boy and run his business he decided to hire someone to help with Charlie, which ended up being you. You and the boy formed a lovely bond very quickly, wherever Charlie was, you’d always be right there with him. You helped the other workers of the house whenever you could, say when Charlie was having a nap or when Mr Shelby took him out, but you were primarily there to watch the young boy.

It was a night like any other, you had tucked Charlie into bed after reading him his favourite story, softly closing his door after you had crept out. You didn’t normally do this, but you decided to check on Mr Shelby to see if he needed anything before you retired for the night. You approached his office door and hesitated before knocking softly.

“Come in” He called out, you eased the door open and stepped slightly into the room.

“I’ve just put Charlie to bed, and I was wondering if you needed anything before, I to headed to bed?” You asked as you watched him lean back in his chair, blowing out smoke as he did.

“Have a seat Y/n” He instructed, you stomach dropped slightly at the seriousness of his tone. You nodded and took a seat on his couch, smoothing out your skirt once seated, you could feel your hands begin to sweat. What was this about? Was Charlie unhappy with you, had you done something to upset either of them, had one of the maids let slip about your painfully obvious feelings towards the man of the house.

“Have I done something wrong Mr Shelby?” You asked quietly as you watched him take another drag of his cigarette.

“Quite the opposite Y/n and please, call me Tommy” he said as he stood and approached the bottle of whiskey sitting on his drinks table. “Whiskey?” he asked, his cigarette hanging loosely between his lips, you couldn’t help but stare at that.

“No thank you Mr Shel- Tommy” You corrected yourself, liking the way his name sounded on your lips, he wouldn’t tell you, but he liked it also.

“I just wanted to check in with you, see how things are going with Charlie” He explained, taking a seat next to you. You had to compose yourself as you had never been so close to the intoxicating man.

“He’s doing very well, he’s started to say a few words here and there and he’s very inquisitive about the world around him, oh and he loves your horses Tommy, his eyes light up and his faces dons the most bright smile I’ve ever seen” You found yourself getting carried away talking about the young boy, you didn’t notice the fond smile on Tommy’s face as he watched you ramble on about his son, you really did care for him and that made Tommy’s heart feel a bit odd. He couldn’t explain what it was he was feeling for you, he’d get a strange feeling when he watched you interact with Charlie, like it was normal, how things were supposed to be. But if that were the case, a sweet woman like you couldn’t possibly want to be with him, he was cursed.

“I’m glad to hear that, I’m glad he’s so fond of you” Tommy stated, you looked at him and gave him a sweet smile, one that made him loose focus for a moment.

“Well, I’m very fond of him Tommy, he’s a lovely boy, like his father” he shook his head at that.

“He’s nothing like me and I’m glad he’s not” Tommy said getting up, making you stand as well, his back was turned to you.

“I think you’re a kind man Tommy, you just put on a hard exterior, you act cold and strong, but I believe that deep down you want to be loved” You don’t know where you found the courage but you reached for his hand, your finger tips gently brushed his before he quickly pulled it away, a feeling of dread washed over you.

“I’m so sorry Tommy I don’t know what I was doing” you tried to explain.

“I don’t know either, but I do know that you should go” Your heart dropped at that “I have some work I need to finish tonight” he said as he moved to his desk, not looking at you once. You quickly made you way to the door, shutting it softly behind you. You cursed yourself once in the hall, you had ruined a good chance to get closer to Tommy, if only you hadn’t gotten ahead of yourself. You sighed and made you way to your room, you barely slept that night.

Charlie had woken up early which meant that it was an early start for you. You had gotten him up and dressed before taking him down for breakfast. The cook wasn’t up yet so you had to make him breakfast yourself, you began gathering what you needed while Charlie sat at the table watching you. In your tired state you weren’t really paying attention to what you were doing and as you pulled a bowl out of the cupboard you knocked one next to it, causing it to fall from the cupboard and smash onto the floor below.

“Damn it” You mumbled, looking to Charlie to see if he was all right and he was too preoccupied playing with his blocks that you had given him to keep him entertained. You retrieved the broom from another cupboard and began picking up the bigger pieces by hand when you suddenly felt a sharp sting on your palm. You winced and dropped the pieces you were holding and sure enough, you had cut yourself. You sighed and quickly finished cleaning up the broken bowl before grabbing a cloth from the sink and lazily wrapping it around your injured hand. You finished making Charlie’s breakfast and placed it in front of him, sitting next to him and waiting while he ate. You examined your hand for a moment, it wasn’t too sore, so you didn’t realty think much of it. Once Charlie had finished you cleaned him up and decided to take him for a walk out to the stables to see the horses he loved.

Most of the day had passed without another incident, Charlie was in a good mood after seeing the horses this morning which helped, your hand was still poorly wrapped but you decided to get Frances to look at it once you’d finished for the day, it was just a cut, it could wait. You were sitting in the family room, watching Charlie play when Tommy entered the room, you felt a lump form in your throat at the sight of him.

“Hello Charlie” He smiled as his boy turned at the sound of his father’s voice.

“Dada!” Charlie exclaimed before Tommy scooped him up in his arms, you watched sadly from the couch, quickly putting on a smile when Tommy looked at you. He frowned slightly which took you by surprise.

“What happened to your hand?” He asked as he placed Charlie back on the floor and began approaching you.

“Oh! Its just a small cut, I accidently dropped a bowl this morning, you can take it out of my pay if you like, it was silly of me to not notic-“you stopped when Tommy kneeled in front of you and picked up your hand gently, what you hadn’t noticed was that blood had seeped through the poorly tied cloth, but Tommy had and he wasn’t impressed. He gently undid your makeshift bandage and winced at the wound underneath, you hissed when the air hit it, he didn’t like the sound one bit.

“It’s more than just a cut Y/n, did you not get it looked at?” He asked, looking between you and the wound, checking to see how deep it might be.

“I was going to get Frances to look at it later tonight when I was finished, it wasn’t bothering me, so I didn’t think it was bad” You explained, watching him as he continued to examine your palm “I’m sorry about the bowl Mr Shelby”

“I told you to call me Tommy” he stated, flicking his eyes up to yours for a moment before they landed back on your hand. You didn’t think he’d want you calling him that after last night.

“Like I said, you can take it out of my pay if you like” You reemphasised, you had already crossed the line last night, the last thing you wanted to do was make things worse.

“I don’t care about the fucking bowl Y/n” He snapped, looking up at you again “You’re hurt” for just a seconded you could have sworn you saw a flash of worry fill his eyes but before you could think more about it, he stood, taking your other hand in his and pulling you to your feet. He led you out of the room, calling to Frances to watch Charlie as he guided you into his office.

“Sit” he instructed, pointing to his desk.

“Tommy, you really don’t have to” you started, turning to face him.

“Sit” he instructed again, this time with a stern expression, you obliged and slid onto his desk, though you felt like you really shouldn’t be sitting on the fine piece of furniture. He brought over a little box and sat it next to you, he retrieved a small bottle from it and wet a clean cloth with it.

“This is going to sting” he said, taking your hand again, before you could ask any questions, he pressed the cloth to your aching palm. An intense stinging pain erupted from the wound.

“Fuck!” You exclaimed, wincing as he maintained pressure, you tried to pull our hand away, but he held it in place. Tommy realised how much he didn’t like seeing you in pain, he made a note to himself to have the bowls moved to a more accessible shelf, one you didn’t have to reach for.

“Shhh” he comforted, rubbing the back of your hand with his thumb, a small act that sent a shiver up your spine. He removed the cloth and set it aside before fishing out a bandage. He gently began wrapping your hand, being careful not to hurt you further, that was the last thing he wanted. He finished wrapping your cut and tucked the end of the bandage back into the wrap.

“All done” He announced, packing up the box and putting it away.

“Thank you, Tommy,” You mumbled, looking at the expert wrapping of your wound.

“Next time you get hurt, please tell me” He said, coming back to his place in front of you. He gently lifted your injured hand and placed a small kiss on your now covered palm, cause your breathing to falter for a moment “Please don’t be so careless” he whispered.

“I promise I’ll tell you and I’ll be more careful Tommy” You built up your courage and rested your hands on his chest, playing with the collar of his suit jacket. A comfortable silence fell over the two of you, just enjoying each other’s company and close presence.

“I’ve thought about what you said last night and you’re right, I do want to be loved” He confessed, placing his hands on your cheeks and dropping his forehead to yours. “Do you think you can do that?”

“Love you?” You asked, you couldn’t believe what he was asking, were you really that tired that you’re just daydreaming this. You begged that that wasn’t the case, this was all you wanted, to be with Tommy in this way.

“Love me” he confirmed.

“Of course, I can” You whispered before he pressed his lips yours, you could every ounce of hope and trust in his kiss, and you knew you were going to prove to him just how much he could be loved.

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iwadori · 4 years ago

Note

are you going to do a 'when the haikyuu boys make you insecure' part with Iwaizumi / could I request that?

When they make you insecure part 6 (Iwaizumi,Matsukawa)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

Word Count: 2.8K

Genre: Angst, Fluff

masterlist

AN: Did I embedd myself in this story? Yes, yes i did. :3 (it’s only a small part dw loool)

Iwaizumi

One day when you were walking to the gym to go see your boyfriend

You overhear him and the team talking about some instagram girl

“She’s hot” you hear Boktuo yell doing a hoot as he fawns over a picture, with the rest of the guys agreeing.

“What do you think Iwaizumi?” Hinata ask

“She’s cute... I guess?” the rest of the guys, grunt in disagreement at Iwa’s lack of drooling over the girl.

“Well I see why you wouldn’t want her Haji-kun,” says Atsumu “you are into the more simple girls bro”

“Simple?” Iwaizumi questions, and the rest of the guys agree

“Yeah simple, you know Y/N... she’s simple” says one of the guys, with the word ‘simple’ rolling off their tounge with a tone of disgust.

“I guess your right guys...” Iwaizumi says “Y/N is pretty basic and simple but-”

You leave the gym before you hear what the rest of them had to say. When you got to your house you bolt straight to the mirror, you look at your outfit and frown. You never thought your style was ‘basic,’ to be fair you wouldn’t describe anybodys style as basic or simple. Of course, you weren’t like those instagram influencers, that wasn’t your thing. But Iwa has known that about you for years... but I guess that’s not what he truly likes.

You go to your closet and take out all the contents, just tossing all your clothes (even some of your favourite items ever) and dashing them in a black trash bag putting them to the side. You were already on a mission to buy a whole new wardrobe, going through all different stores and looking on pinterest for inspo.

You didn’t really talk to Iwa for the rest of the week, since you wanted him to see you in your ‘new form,’ you weren’t being radiosilent but you didn’t initiate any hang outs with him or face time calls (which he did find slightly odd, but didn’t think that much by it.)

Finally, the clothes came and you were kind of shocked at how much you ordered you spent over £200 on clothes from all different places. When you were trying them on, you liked some of them the ones that were kind of similar to your past style but not so ‘simple,’ the others you kind of frowned at since it definitely didn’t feel like ‘you’ at all. ‘This is for Iwa,’ you reminded yourself as your forced a smile on your face analysing yourself in the mirror.

You had everything sorted, your wardrobe was now changed and done the colours and styles you once wore before is now the complete opposite. You invited Iwa over, hesistantly waiting to see how would he react.

When you hear your door knock, you rush over to open it and model a pose you saw one of those girl do trying to look as natural as possible.

“Hey babe ho-” he says, with his eyes widening seeing your new look “Woah Y/N!”

“Hey Haji..come in!” you exclaim with a beaming smile pulling him inside to the couch. “So, are we going to continue watching the crown, I watched the previous episode and god prince phillip is such a dick.”

You look over your shoulder and see Iwa still standing in your entranceway a bit awkwardly, looking a bit stunned. “Come sit down then, we’ve got an episode to watch.”

“uh oh yeah, sure” he says blinking, following you to the couch.

You got through atleast 4 episodes together, you barely talked as you were really engrossed in the show. Iwa was barely paying attention, he was too busy questioning how you were acting. This definitely wasn’t the girl he knew, even the way you were acting whilst watch the show was odd. The way you’d cutely giggle and ‘sublty’ look over to him whilst laughing at a funny part of the show instead of just doing your usual obnoxious laugh that he loved to hear.

“Oh Y/N, I’m going to go to the bathroom.” he says standing up, you don’t reply you just wave your hand in acknowledgement.

On his way to the bathroom, Iwa nearly trips on a black bag left outside your bedroom door. He opens it, and mildly gasped when he saw all your old stuff jumbled up in there. He picks up the back and goes straight back to the living room and stands in front of you.

“Haji, what are you doing you’re blocking the TV” you complaining trying to see what’s happening behind him.

He drops the black bag infront of you and you internally curse yourself for not moving. You stare at him waiting for him to say something.

“Well whats this then.” he says looking down at you, almost like a disapproving dad.

“Clothes.” you say smartly, knowing what he was asking.

“You know what I meant Y/N, why are all your clothes in a garbage bag.”

“Because I wanted to put them there,” you wanted to seem as nochalant about it as possible as if putting all your clothes in a garbage bag doesn’t make you feel sad.

“Yeah but why?” he says sitting down next to you.

“Just because I wanted to” you reiterate “what else do you want me to say?”

“Well this isn’t like you, its just a bit random Y/N” he says

“I know this isnt like me you” you spat, standing up “Isn’t this what you wanted anyways.” You head to your bedroom picking up the bag with you, with Iwa hot on your heels.

“What do you mean this is what I wanted?” he says in disbelief “When did I ever say that?”

“It doesn’t matter” you mumble, you start to aggressively take our your old clothes and shove them back into your wardrobe whilst Iwa is just talking. You’re not really listening to him your just putting the clothes back.

“Y/N Stop!” he yells kind of knocking you out of your ‘trance,’ “what is going on with you?” he grabs you hands and pulls them down stopping you from what you were doing and he winced at seeing your tear stricken face.

He gently pulls you into his arms sitting you both on your bed, waiting for you to speak. “I don’t know what you want from me Iwa..” you start your voice slightly breaking “it’s just I did this all for you and you don’t even appreciate it.”

“I don’t know what you mean Y/N?” he says sounding genuinely confused.

“Y/N is simple and basic.” you say repeating words that you heard your boyfriend say about you, you feel him tense as you say it and you slowly get out of his hug.

“Y/N I-”

“That really hurt Hajime, I know now that I'm not your ‘type’ but I-”

“No Y/N, you are my type of course you are!” he says gulping in nervousness “I love you, and your style. I’ve always being enamored by how you dress and present yourself and I don’t know why I even said you’re basic and simple I didn’t mean it that way.”

“Really?” you say sniffling looking down

“Yes really you idiot,” he says lifting your head up “To be fair I don’t care what you wear, since you look great in anthing I just want you to be happy Y/N and especially not dress for anyone including me. Okay?”

“Okay,” you agree slightly nodding your head.

“Good, so can we go and finish the crown and then burn all these clothes?” Iwa jokes as he stands up.

“Burn them!” you exclaim “These cost £200, you muppet.”

“£200! Gosh Y/N, next time you go shopping im definitely coming with you.” he says shaking his head “can’t have you blowing out your bank account for clothes you don’t even like that much.”

You spend the rest of the day finishing of The Crown and you and Iwa eventually both sort out your wardrobe. Your style and aethetic changes a lot more through the times you were together and Iwa was very supportive and helpful of every single change. Especially *insert your favourite dress aesthetic here.*

Matsukawa

You were walking with your friends; Iwa, Tooru, Maki and your boyfriend Matsun. Walking to school as you did every morning, today the topic of conversation was Tooru’s bad taste in women.

“Gosh yesterday was horrible, she didn’t want to talk to me at all,” he complained “all she wanted to do was to come straight to my place, I didn’t even have the chance to tell her my hair routine.”

“That’s why you don’t find dates off of Tinder shittykawa” grunted Iwaizumi

“Well I know that now!” he exclaimed.

“Y/N,” said Makki grasping your attention “Would you ever use Tinder?”

“Well I-”

“Of course she wouldn’t” your boyfriend interrupted wrapping his arm round your shoulder “she’s got me”

“Yeah, but if you two weren’t together, would you use it.”

“Well may-”

“Y/N definitely wouldn’t” he said interrupting you AGAIN “she’s way to frigid for that shit”

Frigid? You thought to yourself, ouch. Their was a quick awkward silence and all you could hear was Matsukawa laughing with the others laughing after awkwardly in pursuit. After sensing your uncomfortability (is that a word?) Oikawa decides to change the subject to make things less awkward,

“I need a woman who understands me!” he rants “One that can listen to me and appreciate my awesome hair.”

“Goodluck with that Shittykawa.”

Oikawa rambles on as you walk to school with the other guys chiming in. You on the other hand, were lost in thought. Your sex life wasn’t something you would want to publicly talk about let alone to you and your boyfriends' male friends. Also, with Matsun describing you as ‘frigid’ struck a nerve. You weren’t frigid, well at least to you, you weren’t.

When you got to school you immediately rushed straight to your lesson claiming that you teacher really needed to talk to you. Which was odd to Matsukawa as you usually all hung around each other until the bell rang, the other boys gave each other knowing looks all assuming the reasons for your odd behaviour.

At lunch time, you stayed in your class instead of going up to the roof where you and your friends usually end up. In the class room you hear one of the girls in your class, Empress having one of her usual gossip conversations with her group of friends.

“Hajime is so hot!” she said, fanning her face being dramatic

“Of course he is! You should totally go for him.” her friend said and the rest of the friends agreed.

“What do you think Y/N?” she says to you catching your attention “you’re close friends with him right?”

“Yeah, I am” you say a bit sadly “You should definitely go for him, I think you’d be perfect together.”

“Okay! I think I might later” she says smiling. Her and friends leave, but then Empress returns and walks straight to you.

“Are you alright doll?” she asks softly smiling

“I guess so..” you say hesitantly “It’s just something my boyfriend said to me this morning.”

“Matsun?” she asks and you nod in reply “What did he say?”

After you rehash the situation from this morning Empress scowls in annoyance, “Boys can be such pigs sometimes, such a dick thing to say.”

“I know right!” you respond “Even if I was frigid, which im totally not it’s not even a bad thing nor is it something to reveal to people in public in a ‘jokey’ way.”

“Yeah!” she agrees “I think you should go and give him a piece of your mind.”

“I mean...” your voice falters, when it comes to Matsun you’ve never really given him a ‘piece of your mind,’ even when he makes jokes that you’re not so fond of.

“Come on!” she encourages “I’ll come with you and cheer you on.”

“You just want to come to see Iwa Empress” you say pointedly “But fine let’s go.”

You both power walk to the roof where you see the four seijoh boys sitting down and eating. “Oh hi Y/N/-chan and look Iwa its Emp-chan... isn’t that a surprise!” Iwa blushes and the rest of the guys laugh.

You walk straight up to Matsun and stand right infront of him. “Matsukawa I need to talk to you,” you say folding your arms. “Why whats up babe?” he says, still sitting down with a cheeky grin on his face.

“Alone.” you say turning around walking to a secluded spot. Behind you, you hear Matsun get up and the rest of the boys saying “oooh Matsukawa your in trouble” as they laugh.

“What’s wrong with you today Y/N?” he asks slightly accusatorily.

“I didn’t appreciate the comment you made today on the way to school,” you say with your arms folded.

“Oh that little comment about you being frigid, come on it was just a joke I wasn’t being serious.” he says lightly laughing but he stops once he sees the glare you give him ”you knew it was a joke right?”

“Matsun, some are your jokes just aren’t funny,” you say “especially when they're about me and our sex life in front of our friends too.”

“Y/N I didn’t mea-”

“You just come off as a huge dick sometimes, and I can’t do this anymore if you keep on making these comments anymore I don’t think I can do this.”

“Woah Y/N, are you threatening to break up with me?” he asks “Over a few little comments?”

“These aren’t a few little comments, sometimes what you say is just unnecessary and rude.”

“Okay well...”

“Well...” you repeat staring at him waiting for to apologise or atleast say something, “fuck you Matsukawa.”

You storm away and walk bout to the group saying “Empress lets go.” She jumps of Iwa’s lap and waves by to them following you back down to the school. You walk into the bathroom and just start to cry, “Y/N whats wrong?” Empress says pulling you into a hug

“H-He doesn’t care,” you cry “He pretty much excused his stupid comments, passing them off as little ‘jokes,’ that didn’t apparently mean anything.”

“Oh dear,” Empress says consoling you “he’s not worth your time right now.”

“B-but but I love him.” you wail fat tears streaming down your face.

“I know sweetheart, I know,” she says letting go of the hug “so what do you wanna do about him?”

“I don’t know,” you say “I don’t want to break up with him or anything, but is there a point in staying if he’s just going to make these comments again.”

“I don’t know Y/N, but whatever you wanna do I’ll support. Wether it’s keying his car or reading shitty fanfiction and crying.” Empress says making you laugh.

The final bell rings and now it's time to go home, of course you don’t walk with the guys so you just enjoy your own company walking home.

“Y/N! Y/N!” you hear from behind you and of course the only person it can be is Matsukawa.

“What do you want?” you mumbled

“I..I want too” he says heaving out of breath from the running he had to do “I want to apologise. I need do.”

“Okay...” you respond

“Im sorry, Im so so sorry,” he says “those jokes and comments were stupid and I agree I can be a dick sometimes. Well a lot of the time, but I never wanted to be a dick to you.”

“Well you were.”

“I know I was, and I’m so sorry. There’s no excuse what I said and what I have said before I just hope I can make it up to you.”

“Okay then.”

“So are we not broken up?”

“No we’re not broken up, but it’ll take a lot of making up to do for me to fully forgive you.”

“Great! And I'll spend every day to get you to forgive me.”

Which he did, he spent every day showering you with love and affection. He was way better than he was before, you even went on double dates with Oikawa and his flavour of the week and triple dates with Iwa and his girlfriend. Matsukawa, although he still made jokes, he never targeted them and centered them around you in an insulting way.

AN: I didn’t really like the matsukawa one since i couldn’t really write for him properyl sooo sorry bout that one kids.

#haikyuu x reader comfort #haikyu angst #haikyu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyu scenarios #haikyu headcanons #haikyu #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi angst #iwaizumi scenarios #iwaizumi hajime #iwaizumi fluff #matsukawa x reader #matsukawa angst #matsukawa fluff #matsukawa oneshot #signedwithane😌

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astaroth1357 · 4 years ago

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Brothers Accidentally Make the MC Cry

Hello, this is the obligatory italics blurb that I have to put under my titles or else things look weird and it bothers me. Don’t mind the blurb. The blurb is a friend. (Though I could start writing pieces of a little story up here just to see if anyone even reads them… Hm…. Ideas, ideas...)

Warning: Angsty

Lucifer

If he were being honest, he’d say that a part of him had always feared this would happen...

Lucifer likes to tell himself that he’s invincible, but everyday stresses can get to him just like anybody else. And like other people, he may not always act his best when he’s dealing with a full plate…

The MC hadn’t meant to make his day harder when they told him that they accidentally broke a lamp. It was a genuine accident! But Lucifer was still dealing with the fallout from another one of Mammon’s failed schemes, Satan had cursed all of his ties again, and Beel had eaten every scrap of food in the House… for the second time that week...

In comparison to everything else, a broken lamp was quite minor, but for Lucifer it was just the last straw and, for just a moment, he lost control…

His palm slamming against his desk hard enough to snap its legs and send it crashing to the ground. He scarcely knew what kind of look he had on his face, but whatever it was, he had made his human jump back in shock...

Really, it was silly for them to assume that he had gotten that upset over a lamp, but he saw tears starting to gather in their eyes all the same as they stammered out a quiet apology…

It felt like an ice spike to the heart. Damn his temper… He really ought to have been more careful with them after… well, everything he’d done before…

He was quick to go over to them, catching their face with his hand and giving them the most sincere apology he could muster while wiping away their tears… Overreactions aren’t becoming of him and he hated to cause them pain…

He, of course, took care of the lamp himself as penance and on the surface that seemed to be it (but to anyone paying attention, he had softened up on the MC considerably for at least a week. They probably could have sworn in front of Diavolo and he’d let it slide, he felt that bad about it...)

“I’m sorry, MC, I shouldn't have reacted like that… You haven’t done anything wrong, I promise… Please, there’s no need to cry…”

Mammon

Oh? What's that? His heart is now in a million pieces now...? Well, that seems fair…

He and the MC were out on one of his gambling nights and he was actually on a killer winning streak for once! Jackpots around every corner, he was rolling in it!

The MC had tried to convince him to just throw in the towel early, take his winnings while he had them and bail, but he wasn’t hearing any of it.

In hindsight, their insistence must have really shown how much the MC cared about him and wanted him to keep his earnings... but in the heat of the moment all he saw was someone trying to spoil his one night of fun.

To be fair to Mammon, it’s rather rare for him to lose control of his anger like he did. But when they tried to pull him away from the roulette table, he genuinely snarled at them and told them to get lost...!

Fortunately, he regretted his actions immediately after he saw the hurt in their eyes…

If their goal had been to get him to step away from the table, they achieved it. But only because he got up to pull them into a hug while stammering out apologies… Watching them actually shed tears hurt worse than any rope Lucifer had ever tied around him...

He spent the rest of the night away from the casino and trying to cheer up his human like his life depended on it... Seeing them in pain just tore him up that much.

"Ah, come on MC… I'm sorry, honest…! Please don't look at me like that, I'll do whatever ya want okay...? Just no more cryin…"

Leviathan

Now thinks he's the worst, literally the worst. Lower than lesser demon spit. Lower than Cerberus' shit. Lower than… well, you get the idea…

Levi can get very… intense when things involving his passions are brought up. This can be a fairly endearing quality… but it also means he gets disproportionately impassioned about seemingly minor things.

Levi ended up snapping at the MC when they let him over-sleep one day. This wasn’t unusual for them to do as Levi’s sleep schedule was notoriously shitty, but they shouldn't have done it that particular day…

An item he wanted on Akuzon was going to go live that morning and he had to be awake to participate in the bidding. He had mentioned it to the MC the day before, but he blew past it so quickly they didn’t actually remember…

He found out that he missed the bidding after he woke up and he was pissed. Genuinely enraged that they didn’t remember to wake him up to the point that he was shouting and baring his fangs!

… Really it was not a good look and he should have known better.

The look of fear and the tears gathering in the MC’s eyes snapped him out of it like a hard slap to the face, and somehow, it stung even more than that would’ve... It wasn’t long before he was crying along with them, practically begging for forgiveness...

He made it up to them by having a private showing of their favorite movie using a projector in the Planetarium, cuddling with them under a blanket while still, occasionally, muttering apologies under his breath.

“M-MC…? MC don’t cry…!! Please don’t cry, I- I’m sorry!! I… MC… I’m so sorry…”

Satan

Like Lucifer, he always worried this would happen and he hated when it finally came to pass…

He’d spent all his life learning how to restrain his temper, but it’s not a perfect science. There are the occasional times where the heat of the moment gets the better of him and he does something he regrets…

The MC had walked in on him one morning while he was fuming about Beel leaving the fridge empty again. It hadn’t been the first time they’d seen him like this, but this time he was absolutely furious.

He had told Beel again and again and again to get his snacking under control or to, you know, get up early and get more food so the whole family wouldn’t spend the morning starving but noooo! Mr. I’m Hungry never thinks about anything but his own stomach and then leaves whoever’s on kitchen duty to pick up the slack like some dimwitted muscle-bound meathead and THEN-!!

When the MC tried to take his arm to calm him down, he jerked their hand away from him and roared right in their face. He may not be a lion, but the full sound of a pissed off demon could make humans have breakdowns all on its own…

Which was more or less what the MC began to do as he gripped their wrist, panicking while taking shallow, stuttered breaths…

Satan's anger left him swiftly and he let them go, only reaching out to touch them again when he tried to wipe the tears from their cheeks… He had to coo and beg for them to calm down, which was only so successful because he was fighting back tears himself…

On a scale of 1-10 of the worse things his temper has ever done, he'd rank this a firm 200... He refused to touch them for about a week afterwards and it took a long time for him to trust himself again… He just didn't want to hurt them...

"MC?? MC…? M… Oh no… MC, I'm so sorry, I would never hurt you! I… I wouldn't dare… please believe me..."

Asmodeus

Oh baby! Sweetheart! Love of his life!! No, please no… don't subject him to this…

MC and Asmo were out dancing and some witch came by to try and flatter him.

Now, Asmo is a flirt normally, but get a few drinks in him and well… Let's just say his love of attention overrides his better judgment far more often than it should and friends don't let friends go home with creepy witches.

When the MC told the witch to scram, Asmo was confused and, frankly, quite irritated. That lovely lady had been stroking his ego in all the right ways and his human just scared her off so rudely!

Under most situations, Asmo would have kept his cool better but the haze of Demonus made his tongue loose... which let the venom fly…

He couldn’t quite remember what he said. The words left his mouth so quickly that they slurred together on his clumsy tongue, but it must have been enough because the MC flinched away from him.

That hurt all on its own, but as he started to process the pain in their eyes… he had never sobered up so fast...

He had their cheeks cupped in his hands and were kissing away their tears within the instant. Though the loud music at the club should have drowned out his apologies, the MC could see it written all over his equally tearful face…

He pulled them into his arms and then out of the club shortly after, the fog of Demonus that plagued him just moments before had long left him and all he knew was that the MC needed to be brought home and cuddled… stat.

“M-MC…? I’m sorry was it something… did I…? I’m so sorry… Please don’t cry…!”

Beelzebub

He really didn't mean to shout so loud… honest...

Beel becomes a completely different person when he’s hungry. He’s not entirely to blame, as his hunger can get so intense, but he still can snap from time to time when he really doesn’t mean to…

It was right after one of his practices and Beel hadn’t gotten a chance to eat in a few hours by the time the MC came to grab him from RAD. That already had him in a bad mood, but practice hadn’t gone too well for him either…

He honestly didn’t realize how sharply he snapped at the MC when they asked him how he was. The irritation and frustration of the day all hit him at once and he became much harsher towards them than he ever intended…

It must have been the shock of seeing ever-sweet Beel suddenly get so aggressive with them that startled them so. He saw a couple tears gathering in their eyes before they could hide them and his heart just sank…

The MC was picked up in a crushing bear hug before they even let out their first sniffle. Beel didn’t even have to say how sorry he was, they could feel it in every squeeze he gave them. All while he completely ignored the growling of his stomach...

Beel wouldn’t let them go until he was certain they’d forgiven him which, honestly, took a while. Mammon was the one to ask why he had carried them all the way back to the House like a baby but… well, he didn’t need to know, now did he?

“MC, I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have shouted… Are you alright...?”

Belphegor

Stubborn boi is stubborn and trying really, really hard not to crack right now...

That's not going to last long.

Belphie can be a bit of a brat and since he's the baby of the family so he's used to getting his way. He and the MC don't argue a ton, but when they do, he always digs his heels in and refuses to budge an inch on anything.

So what started out as a simple disagreement on how often Belphie would flake out on his chores turned into a kick-the-door-down argument over how much his laziness left the MC to pick up the slack...

It ended as all their barn burning arguments do, with demon-form Belphie sitting cross-legged on his bed refusing to look at them and the MC angrily pacing about the room until he cools off…

And then he heard it.

First a sniffle… and then a hiccup. Another sniffle then muffled whine…

Oh no… not this… Why are they crying…? They don't normally cry…

To his credit (or perhaps discredit), he managed to hold out for about two minutes before he finally glanced back at them. Seeing the MC wiping their tears all alone on the floor crumbled his resolve real quick.

The MC found themselves enveloped by Belphie's arms before they even noticed he got up. Naturally, he was pouting and trying to make it seem like "not a big deal or anything" but they could tell by the nervous twitch of his tail that he was hurting too…

Needless to say. Belphie started remembering his chores a lot more after that.

"Humans are so fragile… I didn't mean to make you cry, you know? I'll get things done just… Don't cry… please…"

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me headcanons #obey me scenarios #obey me imagines

7K notes · View notes

alluringjae · 4 years ago

Text

it’s a royal order - jjh

⤑ summary: one of your royal campaigns became a success, and your bodyguard jaehyun was there to see it all happen. it’s only fair to celebrate, right?

⤑ pairing: jaehyun x female reader

⤑ word count: 2k

⤑ genre: fluff, suggestive (dirty talk, jaehyun got a daddy kink, superiority complex!!), implied smut | bodyguard!jaehyun, princess!reader, slight enemies to lovers!au, modern royal!au (where south korea remains under monarchial power)

⤑ warnings: mentions of alcohol, drugs, family problems and therapy, explicit language

⤑ author’s note: this is definitely less emotional than all i do is wait! i got this idea from a show i really enjoyed before it got cancelled named the royals. specifically, i really liked the story of eleanor and jasper, which is the whole princess x bodyguard dynamic. the pining and tension, ugh! if you know this show or not, it doesn’t matter. anyways, thank you for the 30+ followers and 200 notes on aidiw! enjoy!

i need holy water because of this piece.

⤑ credits to jeongjaehyuns for the gif above uwu

⤑ leave me some feedback, constructive criticism or hellos!

“On behalf of the royal family, I would like to extend my utmost support for the Anti-School Violence campaign for all students to have a safer and more meaningful learning environment.” You proudly announced to the board of officials alongside other influential individuals in Korean society.

Being the only princess in the current royal line may have its pressures, but holding a strong, direct impact for a brighter future for the people motivated you to take advantage of your platform for the better. As the image of pure innocence and revamped women empowerment, you aimed to accomplish all the things your mother wished she could before her untimely death alongside your personal aspirations.

Expressing genuine joy with the campaign, with a tinge of desire to annoy the old-fashioned and closeminded officials, your prying eyes were more enamored by a certain man in the back clapping by the ballroom doors. You can’t help but act flustered whenever he witnessed you in a state of success and satisfaction.

This man went by the name Jeong Jaehyun, your trusted bodyguard since you were in your early twenties. 3 years later, he still stuck by your side and helped you endure all the darkness as a royal.

Back then, you went through a rebellious phase that was ruining the image of your family. Clubbing almost every night, drugs, skipping school, you even managed to get all assigned bodyguards to quit! The media ate up all your tricks, turning them into scandals. That was the plan, of course. You desired your own freedom from all the royal obligations because you didn’t ask to be born into that lifestyle. To all of your peers who wished to be in your footsteps, you would’ve impulsively passed your title to them. There’s so much deception that lies behind the glitz and glam of it all.

This unexpected change in your former untainted attitude came to the point that your father, the king himself, stepped in and personally assigned one of his men to get you in check. He figured that appointing a guard nearest your age may lessen the tension and mend you back together.

In the start, you absolutely despised him. There was no way to fool him when you were up to no good. He easily found your alcohol and drug stash which he disposed of on the spot and stood by your bedroom door every night so you wouldn’t sneak out past curfew (which your father also strictly implemented).

One big turning point in your relationship was when he rushed you to the royal hospital when you drank a cocktail that went unnoticeably spiked. To think that this was a typical social gathering with other royals and officials, you’re a constant target to many. You didn’t wake up for a few days, and the entire time, Jaehyun willingly stood by your bedside and outside your hospital room.

Since that and more instances your father insisted you get involved in royal affairs, you softened up. As cliché as it was, the more time spent with him, the more you knew about him and vice versa. He was the one that got you to fully open up about your grief towards your late mother, encouraging you to seek help. Turns out you weren’t as different as you thought despite your differing ranks in society when he also had a void for a missing parent. In his case, it was his father, who ditched his family for his mistress. Silently, you helped each other recover from your traumas alongside therapy. From dreading his presence, you started treating him more casually. Your father’s tactic of assigning a bodyguard around your age admittedly worked.

Oh, how time flies.

This campaign was the last thing on your weekend agenda, so you had the entire late afternoon and evening to yourself. Bowing one last time to the audience, you stepped down from the platform and accepted the soft hand of your bodyguard, who quickly made his way to you despite the flashing cameras. It was something he got used to as it is part of the job.

Once he successfully ushered you out of the ballroom, his hand still held yours. Nothing new, except this event was quite public and you didn’t want anyone to get any wrong ideas. Strolling down one of the many hallways in the palace became a pastime for the both of you, where no one can catch you. It was a safe haven within the destructive life of the Park kingdom.

“You did phenomenal as I expected, your highness.” Jaehyun complimented, recalling your panic the night before as the stage fright hit strong when you were reciting your speech to him over and over again.

“We are in private, Jaehyun. Must you really use those formalities with me?” You taunted, bobbing your head sideways mockingly. With him could you felt like a normal young adult, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. Jaehyun loved being frisky with you, catching you get irked up. And he was up to do it again.

“Hmm last time we strolled these halls, Yuta caught us making out after a successful meeting with the Prime Minister.”

You gasped at his statement, conscious of whoever may be in the vicinity. But before you could refute, your hand that was interlocked with his were mightily slammed against the white wall. You lost your breath for a moment, his warm body closely on yours. His free hand freely roamed up and down your covered waist. His lips were dangerously near your neck, where you’re sensitive. Your hips naturally grinded against him to release the pent-up tension.

“Something tells me you want to do it again, princess?” Now he’s just using your title as a pet name, but you couldn’t complain. It just hits differently when the situation was set up like this.

“I deserve it, don’t I? Got a lot of those hell-driven officials on my side for this round.” You raised both your brows cockily, licking your lips.

“Hell yeah, you do.” Finally, he rids of the tension and plants open kisses on your bare neck. Your throaty moans were uncontrollable, and you could care less.

“My princess,”

Kiss.

“So intelligent,”

Kiss.

“So benevolent,”

Kiss.

“So helpful,”

Kiss.

“But,” He changed his pace and direction, swollen lips near your ear.

“But?” You question naïvely. He scoffed, smirking at your antics of playing dumb.

“But a total slut for her bodyguard.” He dominantly planted his lips against yours, one of his veiny hands gripping on your waist and the other by the arch of your butt. He was hungry, needy even. Due to your shared schedules, it’s been a constant struggle to have proper alone time from the snooping eyes of Korean society. After all, it wasn’t in the norm for a princess to fall deep for her bodyguard. Nor were you sure you would be accepted by anyone. Yuta, the bodyguard of your oldest brother, the crowned prince Jinyoung, finding the both of you at that time was a total shock but didn’t care either.

All that mattered was that your feelings towards each other are real and strong. Accepted or not, you had each other.

All this lust put you in a daze, wanting much more than another smooch fest in the hallway. Tugging on his belt, he squeezed your butt tightly. You emitted a moan, which allowed his tongue access. No way could you keep your hands to yourself, touching his upper body and the flexing of his abdominal muscles from his button-up. You felt his now hard member poking through.

Analyzing your area, you were on the other side of the palace. Farther to your bedroom where numerous rendezvouses were made, one kink you’ve considered in the past amplified your mind. Considering this area was also the king’s side, and he was abroad for royal affairs, this was your chance.

“I have an idea, my love. You up for it?” You rose a brow at your lover, challenging him. Not one to overpower this man in bed, but always suggesting a way on how to spice it up.

“And what exactly does your feral brain want to do with me, princess?” His finger lifted your chin so you meet eye to eye. You can just see the fire still burning, and oh how you were ready to intensify it.

“The main ballroom, where my father and late mother’s throne rest, are a few doors away.” Your fingers signal him to lower his stance as his tall height was difficult to reach. With a sneaky smirk,

“Let me ride you in the king’s throne, my love.” Your lips brushed over his and sucked his bottom lip, tugging him by his belt. He groaned, squeezing your butt. “It’s a royal order.”

“Nasty, your highness. Insanely nasty, you are.” His hands hoisted your waist, boosting you up in his arms. You gasped with profanities, ravenously cut off by his lips again. His nails digging deep in your bare thighs, your legs naturally linked themselves around his torso while your arms passionately intertwined his broad neck.

In between kisses, he carried you to the said main ballroom. One of your wildest imaginations, just a second away. This room remained to be the only place without any guards stationed technological advancements or updated interior designs to preserve its traditional beauty. Dated as far as the 19th century, only special events were held and the highest of the high were allowed inside. Spacious, surrounded by gold linings majestic paintings of angels from above with a huge crystal chandelier right above the center. Right ahead, the original thrones that your ancestors, grandparents, and parents sat on when they were throned in its pure glory.

Pushing your lover on the king’s throne, the gold sun-like rays plastered behind the headrest, he cockily leaned back and manspread his legs for comfort. He rubbed his hands before patting his thigh, waiting for your submission. But you weren’t going to give in just yet.

Not when you prepared a mini-show just for him underneath your designer silk dress.

Jaehyun’s solemn eyes marveled over your gorgeous figure as you stripped down one strap after the other. Due to its silk fabric, it effortlessly dropped down to your figure to reveal a new set of black lace lingerie from your previous trip to Paris. Ages ago, Jaehyun unhesitatingly ripped your favorite ones during his birthday, so you decided to get a mature version of it. A version where your bra lifted your breasts more and undies hiked up to your waist to elongate your legs. Only for the eyes of yourself and the man in front of you, establishing that you were a powerful woman who can be absolutely anyone she can be. Princess, a normal young adult, or his slut, it’s up to you how you see yourself.

Jaehyun mumbled all the profanities he could think of at the moment. Looking like a divine angel when the sun from outside shuns behind you, his slacks tightening so much more than a while ago.

“All this for me?” He ogled shamelessly, undoing the buttons of his dress shirt and untying his necktie. “What did I do to deserve such regal treatment?”

You sneered at his comment, stepping out your dress in your heels and stationing right in front of his luring lap. “You’ve always been there for me, thick and thin. I think you deserve a reward, don’t you think?”

Lowering yourself to straddle him, his breath hissed when your damp core collided with his crotch. Distracted and caught in your trap, “I don’t think you answered my question, my love.”

Rather than a verbal response, he roughly pulled you back in for a kiss. His hands scattered to explore from your back down to your waist. Your hands messily ran through his hair, tugging on some when your body got too sensitive to his wild touches. The thrilling sounds of the two of you drowning in your fiery romance bounced throughout the ballroom, not minding if anyone passed by the hallways outside. It was a private room after all, and whatever happens here, stays here.

Rolling on his crotch while his lips trailed down to your collarbones, the quick snap of your bra wires echoed. The tight lift lessened as Jaehyun’s fingers dropped the straps, unveiling your bare chest covered in his marks.

“Enough playing, princess. Let daddy have some real fun with you.”

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lucyintheskywithxanax · 4 years ago

Text

I Saw You Trying, My Love

Pairing: Wilhemina Venable x Fem Reader

A/N: ok so this is long, and angry. It all happened because I really wanted to explore the headcanon that Wilhemina would be very possessive and very jealous if she were in a relationship. How would that relationship work? Could it work? I hope you’ll enjoy this piece, lovelies <3

Word count: ~ 8 200

“And what do you think you’re doing?”

Wilhemina’s voice cut through the silence, sharp and angry.

You ignored her. You kept shoving the contents of your wardrobe into your bag.

“I said, what do you think you’re doing?”

“I heard you the first time,” you snapped. You threw one last pair of socks – your favourite, fluffy and glittery – into your bag and gave it a shake. “I thought you’d have figured it out by now.”

You zipped up your bag and stomped past Wilhemina out of the room you had shared with her for the past two months. She must have realized how serious you were, by then, because she followed close behind you. She had never done that before when you had had a fight. She was too proud to run after you like a desperate child. Usually she would let you walk off and wait for you to blow off steam. But today, the sound of her cane followed you down the stairs and into the living room as you went around it, grabbing items you would need – your book, your glasses, your phone charger. Wilhemina’s watch. You threw that back on the couch when you realized what it was.

“Has your brain turned to mush? Where do you plan to go? You have nowhere to go to, Y/N.”

Wilhemina positioned herself in the doorway, blocking your way, both her hands gripping her cane. You came to a halt in front of her and scowled.

“I’m not a baby, Wilhemina,” you retorted, your face mere inches from hers. Your words were thick with anger. “I’ll get along just fine without you. Actually, I’ll be better off without you. Now move.”

She stood her ground, glaring back at you.

“What are you gonna do?” you hissed. “Uh? Lock me up? Bring me food once a day, torture me? Are you going to lock me up in here until you break me and turn me into the obedient pet you wish I were?” You paused to take a breath. “Is that your plan, Mina, my love?” You all but spat the last two words at her like a curse.

For a second you recoiled. You hadn’t meant to do that, turn a term of endearment, a promise of care and tenderness whispered so many times before to soothe and comfort and reassure, into poison. But on second thought, you were glad you had. She deserved the sting.

“I don’t –“she started, but you interrupted her.

“For God’s sake I have the right to spend time with my friends! Not all my life revolve around you, Wilhemina! You cannot keep me with you every minute of every day like a fucking dog!” A fresh bout of fury rose to your head and took control of you. “I can spend time with other people, I can enjoy myself without you! But what I can’t stand is you snapping at me and calling me names every time I so much as smile to someone else! I’ve had enough.” You lowered your arms in defeat, shaking your head at her. “I’ve had enough. I’m leaving. Move.”

Wilhemina’s face was hard and angry, her jaw clenched tight, her poise proud and dominating, but her eyes – you had always been able to tell what she truly felt by looking into her eyes. They were your favourite thing to stare at, not only because it was so easy to get lost in them, but because they were the key to understanding her. The key that opened the safe where she hid herself when she did not know how to communicate or thought she had to lie to keep herself safe. Her eyes were always, always honest. Especially with you. You took one look at them now and then had to look away before your resolve left you.

“Where are you going?” she asked.

“To Maggie’s place.”

Wilhemina scoffed bitterly. “Why, of course. Right into the arms of the daft prostitute.”

“Mina she’s my best-friend since high-school,” you growled, raising your free hand to rub your forehead in frustration. “Please don’t insult her.”

“And what a friend indeed. Always so eager to please, so eager to have you all by herself so that she can lay her dirty little hands on your arm or - ”

“This is what best-friends do!” you roared.

Wilhemina didn’t even flinch.

“Why don’t you screw her tonight?”

“Alright, you – you know what, I’ve had enough.”

You pushed past her, and you must have been too brutal, or maybe she had been unsteady to begin with; in any case, she dropped her cane, and her knees gave way. She winced as she braced herself for the fall, for the pain – but you wrapped your arms around her waist to support her, and held her against you. “I’ve got you,” you whispered into her hair.

Time froze. Silence fell. You closed your eyes, nuzzling your nose in her hair. What were you doing? Leaving her? Ridiculous. As if you could live without her. You pressed her closer against you, feeling like you could burst into laughter at your own excessive behavior. This was just like any other fight you had had with Wilhemina before, nothing you could not mend. Leaving this house, leaving this woman, had never been an option. It would mean leaving your heart. Leaving a part you wouldn’t – couldn’t – survive without.

You dropped a kiss on her forehead and were about to pull away. To cup her face and kiss her mouth and laugh with her at how stupid, how childish you were.

But then you remembered. All the times she had gone too far. All the snapping and the hurting and the possessive, jealous, unhealthy behavior. Earlier this afternoon she had slapped one of your coworkers and friends for “standing too close to you”. It was the first time she had used physical violence. The last straw.

You knew where it all came from, the insecurity and the fear and the pain. But that did not make it acceptable.

Gently, you let her go, picked up your bag and made for the front door.

“Y/N?”

She followed you down the corridor, stopped a few inches away from you as you turned the key in the lock. You felt her hand brush your elbow, but she did not touch you. Somehow it was this, her hesitation, that broke your heart.

“Don’t come after me,” you told her over your shoulder.

“Y/N don’t you dare –“

You opened the door, ignoring her, closing your eyes against the setting sun and the tears that were starting to pool. Wilhemina’s voice rose behind you again, not angry anymore, but shaking, and terrified. She was terrified.

“Y/N don’t you – “

You slammed the door behind you and ran down the driveway to your car, afraid you’d turn back and fall into her arms if you stopped for one second.

It hurt. It felt like your heart had been torn out of your chest. You opened the door of your car with shaky hands, sobs wracking your body, barely seeing anything through your tears.

You didn’t remember much after that. You must have driven all the way to Maggie’s. Knocked on her door, with your bag in one hand and sobs bubbling out of your throat. She must have let you in, asked you, were you alright, was Wilhemina alright – perhaps she hugged you. Certainly she made you some tea, for Maggie was one of those people who believe tea can make everything better. As if you had not irremediably broken what you cherished most.

You must have drunk your tea, to please Maggie.

The bed in her spare room was big and comfortable. The sheets smelt of fresh peaches. You spent the rest of the evening cocooned in their warmth, alternating between dozing and sobbing into the pillows. When night fell, Maggie brought you dinner on a tray. She sat beside you as you swallowed what your stomach could hold. And then she asked you what had happened.

You hadn’t been able to tell her yet. You’d thought that, perhaps, if you kept it a secret, your leaving Wilhemina wouldn’t be real. You would be able to go back home and find her there waiting for you. She would rise when she’d hear you come in, and she would smile that fond smile of hers and wrap you up in her arms and kiss you slow and sweet. Somehow, all of your problems would be gone.

It didn’t work like that. You knew it didn’t. But still, you couldn’t help but hope.

Maggie didn’t believe you, at first. She gawked at you, then narrowed her eyes and scrutinized your face. She was naive, Maggie. Very romantic. She believed love was stronger than everything else. She had spent five minutes with you and Wilhemina and proclaimed with tears in her eyes that she had never seen two people more in love. It simply wasn’t possible for you to be without Wilhemina, and for Wilhemina to be without you. You would cease to exist. The world would explode.

But then, as you dissolved into tears again, unable to finish your story as you desperately clang to her, her face fell. She let out a small “oh” that sounded so surprised, so final, so defeated. It rang in your ears like a bell mourning death.

You didn’t go to work the day after. Nor the day after that. You knew Wilhemina would be at Kineros, knew she was too hardworking to even consider taking a day off. Hell, Wilhemina could be dying of pneumonia, she would still drive to work and sit at her desk and boss everyone around. Throwing snarky comments like knives at frightened employees, making sure everyone was doing their jobs. You could picture her, sitting straight and proud in her chair, with her cane leaning against her desk and her hair tied in that high ponytail you loved so much, for it accentuated her sharp cheekbones. Had she taken off the photograph on her desk? Of you and her, on a sunny day in the countryside a year ago, a few days after you had started dating. Your hand on her cheek, your teeth on her chin, her eyes half-closed and crinkled up with laughter.

You wouldn’t have gone to work even if Wilhemina hadn’t been there. There was no point anymore. You had never really cared for the job anyway. The only thing that had made life interesting had been Wilhemina.

So you spent hours in bed until the sheets no longer smelt of fresh peaches but of your sweat and tears. You went for a run with Maggie. You tried to keep yourself busy, read a book, watched movies, cleaned Maggie’s house. You knew you couldn’t spend the rest of your life at Maggie’s, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

It became harder to get up in the morning. Harder to fall asleep at night. So you daydreamed and thought of Wilhemina. To soothe the pain of her absence. You thought of her face in the morning, still soft from sleep. That magic moment when she would wake and those big, brown, doe eyes of hers would meet yours and smile. How deftly she would do her hair, ponytail always perfectly centered. How sometimes, while she waited for the water to boil for her tea, she would stare out the window and get lost in the view.

One day it struck you how often Maggie did touch you. She was a very touchy-feely person, had always been: she would pat your shoulder or hold your hand or stroke your arm or kiss your cheek. It was innocent, she behaved like that with everyone. But now you realized how it must have looked to someone as insecure as Wilhemina.

Maggie was beautiful. All blue eyes and soft strawberry blond locks and pink cheeks and pretty flowery dresses. She was soft, and selfless, and very kind, and everyone adored her. She taught French at the University. Had a fiancé, wanted to start a family. Exercised every day. She was normal and healthy – more than that, she was perfect in every way. No rough edges, no high walls, no back pains that kept her up all night, no early appointments to the doctor’s, no days that could be ruined by one glance at her reflection in the mirror. Maggie had found her place in the world and the world cherished her.

And yet – and yet how brighter Wilhemina shone in your head. She was a lighthouse, Maggie a candle. How much more precious and rare Wilhemina was. There were a million things in her that singled her out as one of the most fascinating person you had met. How she could make a witty comment on something the likes of Maggie would never notice in the first place. How she would stare right into the eyes of whatever scared her and defeat it with patience and determination. How deeply, how fiercely she loved.

On the eighth morning without her you woke up completely panicked and haunted by the knowledge that she was hurting on her own. She would never tell anyone she needed help, she had never allowed anyone but you to see her vulnerable. She would push on through her days as if everything was perfectly fine and go back every night to a dark, cold, lonely house where everything would remind her of you. Did she get enough sleep? Was she even eating? It seemed likely to you she would use food deprivation to punish herself. Eating the bare minimum to make it through the day without collapsing.

You asked Maggie to check on her. She drove to your house one evening and came back in a sour mood. Oh, Wilhemina was just fine, she jeered. Her usual pleasant, cheerful self. She had opened the door, taken one look at her, and sent her off with a scoff. Maggie was so angry she spilled most of her drink on the floor. And despite it all, you couldn’t help but smile.

In the morning of the tenth day, after Maggie had gone to work, you came downstairs and slumped on the living room couch. It was a beautiful, sunny day, so you had opened all the windows and the front door to let the draft in. You prayed the fresh air would take away some of the ache in your chest. Or maybe a murderer would walk into the house and put an end to your misery.

You were starting to doze off when you heard a knock on the front door. You started, and sleepily called out “It’s open”.

Silence, as if whoever stood outside hadn’t quite made up their mind to come in yet. You yawned, scratched your head. The sound of a cane tapping on the floor filled the hall.

For a second you felt you were about to faint. Then your body sprang up, eyes wide-opened, heart pounding in your ears.

You sat down on a nearby chair facing the door. Ran a hand through your hair, straightened your clothes. You waited.

Tap. Tap. The sound of her cane brought tears to your eyes – for how you had missed it. Not so much the sound itself but the promise that came with it, seeing her, being with her. Love and happiness and everything that mattered in the world.

The tapping stopped. You raised your head. Your racing heart leaped out of your chest straight into her hands, like a fledgling that had left its nest too soon and flew back trembling and terrified to the safety of home. How stupid you had been to leave at all.

She stood in the doorway more beautiful than you remembered her, because so painfully missed, so hoped for, so loved.

She looked tired, but fine – not exhausted, not starved, not over-worked. Thank God. Some of the tension that had been building in your shoulders vanished. You searched her face for signs of emotions and truth behind her facade, but could find none. Even her eyes were inscrutable.

For a few, agonizingly long seconds you both stayed silent, glaring at each other, both of you too proud to lower your eyes or look away first. Then Wilhemina took a breath and opened her mouth, and your body leaned towards her in expectation.

“Your productivity at work this past week was astonishing,” she said.

Right. You straightened in your seat, and crossed your legs.

Wilhemina waited, but as no answer came from you she added: “Do you intend to get fired?”

“If you’ve come here to scold me, you can leave now,” you mumbled. Your hand started rubbing circles on your knee. “I’m not interested.”

Another pause. You picked a book on the coffee table and stared intently at it. The silence was painful. From the corridor came the ticking of the clock hung on the wall. You could just make out Wilhemina’s purple shoes and pale ankles out of the corner of your eye.

When the silence became intolerable, you tilted your head just enough to shoot her an angry glance and snapped: “Why are you here?”

Wilhemina tapped her cane threateningly on the floor. That didn’t faze you. Not anymore.

“I’m here,” she said in that low, slow voice she always used when she was mad, “as your superior and as Kineros Robotics’ HR manager, to remind you that you have a job and that you are expected to actually show up at your workplace.”

Was she getting enough sleep? Only now did you realize that she was leaning on her cane a bit more heavily than usual. Was her back hurting her? Did she even take her pain medicine? On several occasions before she had refused to, as a form of punishment against her disability. You had had to coax and beg for her to finally agree to swallow the pill.

“I expect you to answer me when I talk to you.” Wilhemina’s voice, sharp and angry, brought you back from your thoughts. You glanced up at her again.

“Yes, Ms Venable.”

“If you do not go back to work tomorrow I will have to dismiss you.”

“Yes, Ms Venable.”

“Your unjustified absence is quite simply intolerable.”

“Yes, Ms Venable,” you repeated.

Another pause. You had no idea what you were feeling anymore. Anger and irritation had subsided and been replaced by a sort of numbness that still had an aftertaste of want. You stared at the book, your fingers still rubbing circles on your knee as you listened to the ticking of the clock in the corridor.

Wilhemina spoke, and this time her voice wavered on the last word. “When are you coming back?”

She meant to work, of course. You lifted your head, met her eyes. She meant come home.

“I’m not coming back,” you answered, keeping your voice casual to hide the fact that your heart was breaking yet again, small pieces drifting away and colliding with each other.

“What do you want me to do?” Wilhemina cried, her eyes widening in exasperation. “Crawl at your feet and beg for mercy?”

She barely ever raised her voice. Her anger and contempt were always expressed in a dangerously slow and low tone. A high, raised voice meant she felt cornered. It meant her self-control was slipping away. It meant her facade was breaking.

You leaned towards her in your seat, hope seeping in your veins.

“How about you start by apologizing to Pat?” you said, as casually as before.

“Who’s Pat?”

“My co-worker and friend you so kindly slapped in the face last week. And to Eva, whose fingers you threatened to clip off one by one because she had the audacity to touch my hand. And to Maggie. You called her such terrible names when all she did was being there for me. Do you see the problem, Mina?”

Your little speech had made you angry again, bad memories flooding your brain, so it was a surprise when her nickname slipped out of your mouth. It seemed to quiet her for a second. Her shoulders relaxed. She even took a tentative step towards you. But then her face hardened again, and when she spoke her voice was back under control.

“I will do no such thing,” she snapped, tapping her cane on the floor. “All those idiots you mentioned had it coming.”

You sighed and slumped back into your seat. You knew what she was doing. Suddenly you were brought back to the first time she had allowed herself to be vulnerable in front of you. It had been one evening in the second week of your relationship. She had had a bad day, and her back was hurting her, and the only way she had found to express that – the only way she had known how – had been by snapping at you for overcooking the pasta. You had been about to snap back, when an apology had slipped out of her. Soft and unexpected. You had fallen silent in surprise. Her hands had started to fidget, and she had looked angry with herself, couldn’t meet your eyes, couldn’t find anything more to say, couldn’t stop fidgeting. So you had hugged her, run her a bath, made love to her, brushed her hair until most of the tension had left her body.

Snapping was her way of protecting herself, you knew that. But still – it hurt, and you had had enough.

“Well then, please, leave,” you mumbled, closing your eyes and raising one hand to pinch the bridge of your nose.

“So you can be in the delightful company of Maggie the Cat?” she snapped.

“Oh for God’s sake, Wilhemina,” you sighed, but she didn’t seem to hear you.

“Sweet, sweet Margaret,” she sneered, taking one more step towards you, her hands shaking. “With her sweet maiden face and her cheerful disposition. So charming, so lovely. She’s part of that disgusting group of radiant fools who will lead the world to its demise with their shallowness and their stupidity.”

You jumped to your feet. “Maggie is my friend,” you growled, planting yourself a few inches from her, your whole body hot with anger. “If you loved me as you claim you do, if you had an ounce of respect for me, you wouldn’t say such things about her!”

Something on her face changed at your words. You couldn’t tell what exactly, but a feeling of dread suddenly came over you.

Wilhemina tapped her cane on the floor, raised her chin and hissed, “Maybe I don’t. Love you, at all. Maybe I only used you for company.”

You took a step back, reeling as her words echoed in your head. You knew she was lying. What you two had shared had been too strong to be fake. She had trusted you with things and parts of herself she had never told or shown anyone before. She had let you love her and trusted you would not hurt her.

In a better world you would have been able to control your anger. You would have taken a few deep breaths to calm yourself and put your hands on Wilhemina’s shoulders and told her for the hundredth time what she obviously still needed to hear – that in your heart, Maggie did not hold a candle to her. That Maggie was your friend and you loved her, but not the way you loved Wilhemina. That you would go to Hell for her and beat Lucifer’s ass if it meant keeping her safe.

But this was the real world, where battered souls keep hurting each other. Anger burnt in you like a fire and filled your brain with smoke until you could no longer think. Only fight back.

“Maybe I did, too,” you snarled.

You saw her hesitate. You saw her snarky retort die on her lips as she took in your words. And for a moment it felt great. To know you could still affect her, still peel off her layers and press the pads of your fingers on bare skin. But you had only ever stroked before; never scratched.

The tap of her cane on the floor surprised you, for it sounded weaker than usual. It did not bounce off the walls but fell at her feet like a weak preemie and died.

“If you do not show up tomorrow at 8 then don’t bother coming back at all,” Wilhemina commanded. “Kineros will do just fine without you.”

She was staring at something above your left shoulder, and she was breathing too fast, as if she were trying very hard not to cry. When she felt your gaze on her face she briefly shifted her eyes to yours. She blinked, and a tear rolled down her cheek.

“Mina,” you started, taking a step towards her. She raised one hand to stop you.

“That will be all,” she said, and wiped the tear away.

You let her turn on her heel, walk down the corridor and close the front door behind her. You stood as if petrified in the middle of Maggie’s living room, until something in you broke. You grabbed the book on the coffee table, hurled it at the wall, and screamed.

When Maggie came home that evening, she walked into your room with a moody, “What happened to Virginia Woolf?” She waved the battered book at you until you turned and she saw your face.

“Oh, babydoll, what’s wrong?”

She held you as you sobbed and wailed. She stroked your hair and whispered sweet-nothings to calm you down. It only made you cry harder, for it reminded you of all the times Wilhemina had comforted you. How she, too, had held you close and tried to find the right words to stop your tears. But Maggie was taller and stouter. Her body did not fit yours as Wilhemina’s did. When you eventually took a long breath in through your nose, her perfume smelt wrong. Too sweet, too floral.

You didn’t show up at 8 at Kineros the day after. It had been hard to care before, now it was simply impossible. You stayed in bed, wishing you could disappear into the sheets. You ignored Maggie’s encouragements and reproaches. You didn’t care.

Maggie brought you water and food, which you nibbled at mechanically. Time passed. You dozed often, but never slept.

Time kept on passing. You waited. You weren’t quite sure for what.

On the third day your phone rang. You reached out for it, and accepted the call without looking at the screen.

“Hello?” you mumbled, your voice raspy from disuse.

“Oh, Y/N?” said a familiar voice. “I thought you were dead.”

“Jeff.” You closed your eyes. “Look,” you started, “I know I haven’t – “

“What have you done to Venable?” Jeff cut you off.

Your eyes opened. “What do you mean?” you asked, your grip on your phone tightening.

“She hasn’t shown up for the past three days.” There was a loud noise at the other end of the line, then Jeff’s voice again. “Last week she was even more bitchy than usual, and now she’s gone. I don’t know where the file I need is, I missed all of my appointments and what’s worse, we’ve run out of coke. I can’t be a genius if I’m not high. Y/N?”

You barely heard him call your name. You could barely breathe from fear.

“Y/N, you still here?”

“Yeah, I –“ You swallowed around the lump in your throat.“Are you sure she’s not at Kineros?”

“I’m at Kineros, Y/N, and Venable isn’t,” Jeff answered, annoyed. “Look, I don’t know what your problem is, but I won’t let your sapphic affairs ruin my company.”

“I – “You stood up on shaky legs. You had to move, you had to do something to keep the panic at bay. It wasn’t like Wilhemina to miss work. She’d rather die than shun her responsibilities. And three days in a row? Something must have happened to her. Your brain started making up all kinds of dreadful scenarios in which she had been hurt, hit by a car, abducted, in which she had locked herself up in her room without food or water, jumped from a bridge, bought a plane ticket to some faraway country where you would never find her.

“Y/N?” came Jeff’s voice, interrupting the mad race of your thoughts.

“Yes, I – “You forced yourself to take a deep breath. “Venable isn’t my responsibility,” you heard yourself say.

“Look, Y/N,” Jeff retorted, his voice growing angry. “You’re expendable, Venable is not. We need her. I don’t care what you do, but you better make sure she comes back tomorrow.” And with that he hung up.

For a few seconds you stood petrified with your phone still pressed against your ear. And then you jumped into action. You dressed, grabbed your handbag, flew down the stairs and in your haste nearly collided with the door of your car. You forced yourself to drive under the speed limit on your way to your house. Dying wouldn’t help.

Part of you realized that it felt good. The life pumping into your veins again. You felt like you had finally woken up.

You parked on the sidewalk in front of your house, too impatient to maneuver your car up the driveway. You ran to the door and knocked on it. You closed your eyes as you waited, panting. You sent a prayer to whomever you could think of – please let her be okay. You didn’t care how mad you were with her anymore. Just, let her be okay.

The door opened. You looked up.

Wilhemina was wearing an old, faded lilac sweater and a pair of black cotton shorts. Her hair was down. She had no make-up on. When her eyes met yours, her face didn’t harden or fall or change at all; she merely held your gaze, as if she were too tired or too numb to react.

“You’re here,” you breathed out in relief. You could have burst into tears of joy at the sight of her alive and safe.

“I only own one house,” she said dully.

“Right, of course, I know.” You scratched your head nervously. “Er, Jeff called. He’s, er, worried about you.”

Wilhemina watched you unblinkingly. You shifted your weight from one foot to the other. It was all you could do to stop yourself from collapsing into her arms and kiss her senseless.

“He said you haven’t been to work for three days,” you tried.

“And why,” she said, “do you care?” There was no trace of animosity in her voice. In fact, there was nothing at all. No emotion. No life.

“He asked me to come check on you.”

Shit. You could have slapped yourself. Wilhemina’s face did harden, then, and she made as if to close the door, but before she had time to you cried out: “No, wait, that came out wrong. Please.” You held up a hand. Wilhemina waited. “He told me you hadn’t shown up in days, and I got worried. That’s why I came. Not because he asked me to.”

She watched you for a few seconds more, then lowered her gaze. Her left hand came up to fidget with the hem of her shorts. She looked so small in those clothes, so young and so fragile. Tears stung your eyes. You blinked them back.

“Can I come in?” you tried.

Her eyes met yours. Please, you begged her in your head. Please, let me in. Please, give us this chance to make it right. Your heart was beating so fast it was starting to hurt.

Eternity passed before she finally – oh what bliss! – stepped aside to let you in. You brushed past her, got a whiff of her perfume mixed with the faint smell of sweat. She ran a hand through her hair nervously, leaning slightly away from you to close the door.

The house was exactly as you had left it, and yet it looked so different. Quieter, somehow, and a bit battered, as if it had just come back from the battlefield to rest and mourn its departed friends. Your footsteps echoed loudly down the corridor as you walked to the living room. You took off your shoes and shoved them in a corner. To make a point. That you didn’t mean to leave until you had talked things through.

Wilhemina stopped in the doorway and waited.

“Um, thank you,” you mumbled. “For letting me in.” As if it weren’t your house, too. But that wasn’t the point.

Wilhemina nodded. Silence fell. You looked around the room nervously, at a loss for words.

“Are you okay?” you finally blurted out. Wilhemina glared at you. “Right. Sorry, stupid question.” You swallowed hard. “Have you, um, have you eaten? I could make something.”

“Who am I to stop you?” Wilhemina answered flatly. “We both know how you need to keep yourself busy when you’re nervous.”

“It’s not about me,” you countered. “I was wondering when you last ate, that’s all.”

She held your gaze for a few more seconds, then proceeded to walk around the room to rearrange things – a candle on a shelf, the cushions on the couch, anything. You watched her, noticed the slight shaking of her hand, how tightly she was gripping her cane. Her hair fell over her eyes as she leaned forward. She briskly pushed it back.

When there was nothing left for her to tidy, she sat on the couch and opened a book.

You stared at her profile, your hands twitching at your sides. Wanting nothing more than to reach out. Sit by her side. Hold her close. Sink into her warmth.

You cleared your throat, and went into the kitchen.

It did help, having something to do with your hands. It relieved some of the ache in your chest. You were too preoccupied to be creative, so you settled on frozen Yangzhou fried rice and an endive salad. Substantial, but easy to eat. In case she was feeling as nauseous as you were.

You were cutting the endives when you heard Wilhemina call from the other room. “I’m going to take a shower.”

“Alright,” you called back, trying to catch a glimpse of her through the door. “It’ll be ready in twenty minutes.”

You listened to the sound of running water as the rice thawed out. Thought of the right words to say. Part of you wanted to forgive her without further ado and pretend nothing had happened. But that would only buy you more time. Until the next insult, the next fight. Anger swelled in you like a wave as you remembered Pat’s perplexed face, lifting a hand to his cheek where Wilhemina had hit him. His own outburst, “What the hell is wrong with her?!”, Wilhemina’s cold, unreadable expression. The fear in her voice when you had slammed the door behind you.

You closed your eyes and sighed. The only way you could think of to make things right was to have Wilhemina truly, fully open up to you. Convince her that sharing her fears with you would be better than lashing out on other people. Make her realize, and trust, that there was nothing you wanted in the world more than a future with her.

You turned off the heat under the rice and sat at the table as you waited for Wilhemina. Half an hour had passed since she had disappeared in the bathroom. She loved to take long showers, but she hated being late even more. You had told her she had twenty minutes; any other day, she would have made sure to be ready in fifteen.

You waited ten more minutes before you started to get truly worried. You walked to the foot of the stairs and called out her name. There was no answer. You called out again, louder. Silence mocked you.

You hurried up the stairs, your heart in your throat, and knocked on the bathroom door. “Mina? Are you alright?”

And still there was no answer. And you were starting to grow angry again, at her silence, at her shunning you, when you heard it. Faint and muffled, but unmistakable. A sob.

You opened the door and rushed into the room.

Wilhemina was sitting on the floor with her back against the tub and her face hidden in her hands. Her wet hair was dripping on her lap, soaking the purple bathrobe she was wearing. She must have dropped her cane, for it lay on the floor under the sink a few feet from her.

You rushed up to her and dropped on your knees.

“Baby,” you called, reaching for one of her wrists, “what happened? Are you hurt?”

You tried to gently pry her hands away to get a look at her face, but she didn’t let you. If anything, she stiffened and buried her face deeper in her hands.

Her shoulders shook as she tried to stifle the low, painful sobs that wracked her frail body. You gently brushed her hair back as you waited for her to calm down, not daring to wrap your arms around her, but dying to offer her comfort.

Eventually her sobs turned into sniffles and soft hiccups, and you asked her again what had happened.

“I dropped my cane,” came her answer, weak and muffled. “As I was getting out of the tub.” A shudder ran through her.

“I’m sorry,” she went on. “This…” She lifted one of her hands, then, to gesture at her body, and you caught a glimpse of her face, red and coated with tears. “You deserve so much better than this. Please, go back to Maggie.”

You blinked at her words, at the pain and anguish they expressed. How had it come so far? How blind had you been? Not to realize how insecure she was, how convinced she was she could never be enough. To the point that she had agreed with herself to let you go.

You shook your head sadly. “But Maggie’s not the one I want.”

She let out a small, pitiful noise at that, and dissolved into tears again. This time, you didn’t think. You scooted over and gathered her into your arms. She sank into you, her hands coming down to clutch your shirt, her face pressing against your chest. There was no restraint anymore. No trying to stifle her sobs or hold back her tears. She let it all out, sobs shaking her body as she sank deeper and deeper into you, as if she were desperate to make one, to leave herself behind and become part of you.

Her sobs grew louder, and she seemed to have lost all control on her breathing, a gasp in and out and out again without inhaling. She was working herself up in quite a state, so you did the only thing you could think of to help her calm down. You tipped her head up. Captured her lips with yours.

Her mouth was wet and hot and salty, but you didn’t care. You wanted so much more of it. It tasted like home, and love, and safety. You had missed it so much, kissing her, feeling her. Your hands came up to cup her face, fingers pressing on her drenched cheeks as you pulled her closer, humming softy into the kiss.

It did quiet her. Her breath hitched, her shoulders tensed, but then she was kissing you back fervently, as if her life depended on it. Maybe it did. You didn’t know anymore. You were only aware of the sweet warmth of relief coursing through your veins and making your head spin. And of something else, something that ached and throbbed – want. It frightened you, this level of want. Your whole body was burning and tingling with it. It wasn’t so much lust as merely wanting to hold her. To feel her again. Love her freely and endlessly.

Again it hit you how stupid you had been to think you could ever live without her.

When you broke the kiss for air, she let out a whine and immediately chased after you. She was still crying, hiccups rippling into your mouth, drenched skin rubbing against yours. She circled her arms around your neck and bit down on your lower lip, hard, as if to mark you hers. A vampire bite, to contaminate your blood with hers and make sure you and she were the same.

After a while she broke the kiss and slumped into you. She was practically sitting on you now, arms tight around your neck, face buried in your chest, hip digging into your lap. You ran a hand through her hair as you rubbed circles on her back, humming a soft lullaby as a few last tremors shook her body.

It had started to rain outside. You suddenly became aware of the patter on the roof. You leaned your head on top of Wilhemina’s and closed your eyes.

“I didn’t mean it, you know,” came her voice, raspy but soft. “What I said the other day. I do love you.”

You hummed, dropped a kiss on her hair. “I know.” A pause. “I love you, too. Of course I love you.”

She let out a shaky breath, then sat up. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying. You leaned in to kiss her burning eyelids. You kissed her forehead, a magic kiss, to soothe the throbbing in her head.

She met your gaze, bit her lip. You gave her a smile.

“Come on, get up,” you urged.

You waited for her in the living room as she cleaned her face, dried her hair and dressed. She put on the pajama set she always wore when she wasn’t feeling confident: baggy pants and a shirt that was too big for her. It didn’t cling to her body. It hid her body completely from view.

You managed to convince her to eat some of the rice. You ate in silence, watching her as she chewed and swallowed. She was sitting perfectly straight in her chair, head held high, eyes on her plate. When she was done, she delicately dabbed her mouth with her napkin, which she then folded on the table.

You waited. She stared at her empty plate for a moment, and then frowned.

“Look,” she finally said, “this is hard for me. I don’t know where to start.”

You nodded. “I know. That’s alright. Take your time.”

“I don’t usually… talk – “Her voice faltered. She glanced up at you, eyes dark and still rimmed red. You smiled in encouragement.

“Your friends,” she went on. Paused. As no other words came out, you got up from your seat, kneeled in front of her, and reached for one of her hands.

“I don’t hate them,” she said very quietly, staring down at her plate.

You couldn’t help but scoff. “You have a very peculiar way of showing it.”

Her lower lip quivered and her brow pushed up as if she were about to start crying again. You gave her hand a squeeze.

“Hey, none of that. Talk to me. What really bothers you about my friends?”

She squeezed her eyes shut, swallowed hard. You waited. When she opened her eyes again, they were shining with tears.

“I – “She shook her head, let out a sad laugh. “I don’t – “Her voice cracked. Her eyes met yours. “Please don’t – “

“It’s okay,” you whispered, bringing your free hand up to cup her cheek. ”I’m staying. I’m listening.”

A tear dropped from her eye, crashed between your thumb and index; and then she inhaled shakily and it all came out of her at once, words stumbling out like a panicked mob out of a room on fire.

“I’m afraid you’ll find someone better than me. All those kind, healthy people, I’m afraid you’ll truly see them one day and realize you could have so much better, so much more.” A breath out, as her face crumpled. “I don’t – I can’t – “A sob pushed out of her throat, and her breath hitched, and when she tried to inhale again she let out a noise as if she were choking. “I don’t – I don’t think I can ever be – be enough for –”

“Okay, you’re okay,” you cooed as her breathing grew frantic. “Mina, you’re okay.” She shook her head, her body slumping as fresh sobs tore their way out of her throat. “Hey,” you breathed, blinking back your own tears. You let go of her hand to cup her face.

Her cheeks were burning. You ran your thumbs over her cheekbones, catching her tears as they fell.

“Mina, I know you’re hurting,” you whispered. Your voice broke. You cleared your throat. “Baby, I want to be here for you.”

She nodded, hiccupping as she tried to wrestle her emotions back under control. One of her hands came up to wipe sloppily at her nose.

“Let’s move to the couch, ok?” you suggested. “Let’s get you comfortable.”

She didn’t let go of your hand on the very short way to the couch, her palm clammy against yours. She always did that, always had to be touching you: her ankle pressed against yours, her hand resting on your arm or on your waist, her shoulder brushing yours.

You sat down, and she hesitated before she snuggled up to you. She rested her head on your shoulder and reached for one of your hands in your lap.

There was a quiet moment, silence only broken by Wilhemina’s sniffles, and then you shook your head and teased, “What am I going to do with you?”

You felt her stiffen against you. “Because it’s such hard work and you never do a stroke of work,” she snapped.

“Mina,” you warned.

“Sorry,” she said quickly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.”

You dropped a kiss on her head. “Okay.”

You wrapped one arm around her shoulders and drew her closer. Automatically your hand started playing with her hair.

“You know,” you went on, “it’d have been easier if you had just told me how you felt instead of taking it out on my friends.”

“I know,” she whispered.

“I’ll tell you what we’ll do. From now on, you be honest with me. Whenever the bad thoughts come, whenever you feel like you could never be enough, you tell me. It doesn’t have to be with words, if that’s hard for you. We can decide on a code. Like this,” you poked her hip, and she jumped and let out a chuckle,” or this,” you leaned in, blew raspberries on her shoulder, “or this,” you stuck out your tongue and licked her cheek.

“You’re gross,” she laughed. She raised one hand to keep your face away from hers, but you dodged it and gently blew into her ear.

“Y/N.” She had meant to sound firm, but laughter rang in her voice.

“I’m sorry, was that supposed to be a threat?” you teased.

“I think the real question is, what am I supposed to do with you.”

“Um.” You pretended to think that through.”Love me.” A kiss on her shoulder. “I think love me is good.”

She looked up at you with a wistful look in her eyes. Her hand came up to touch your cheek. She smiled, soft and tender and fond, the smile she only ever gave to you. “Love you is good,” she whispered.

Her eyes flicked down to your mouth. You leaned in to kiss her, pouring tenderness into her mouth. When you pulled away, she let out a soft sigh as if she were about to fall asleep.

She rested her head on your shoulder again and closed her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“It’s alright,” you whispered back.

It still rained outside. You listened to the patter on the roof. Leaned your head on top of Wilhemina’s.

She fit so snuggly against you. She made you feel entirely safe, entirely you. You drank from her warmth the solace you had not been able to find in the peach-scented sheets or in Maggie’s reassurances and embrace.

After a while, you felt her nudge her nose on your shoulder. She drew a shaky breath, and asked, “So you’re not leaving?”

Your heart clenched at the vulnerability and fear in her voice.

“Um, no,” you answered. “I’m giving you a second chance.” A kiss on her forehead. “How long I’ll stay is entirely up to you. And Mina, please believe me when I say I hope you’ll give me reasons to stay forever.”

“I’m not sure I’ll be content with forever,” she said.

You rolled your eyes. “Of course you’re not.”

She shifted against you, moved her head to plant a lazy kiss on your neck, draped one arm loosely around you. Her hand slipped under your shirt and she dragged her nails on your skin, across your belly, down the curve of your waist.

And then you felt it. A poke, on your left hip. Like a question.

You grinned. “Just like that, my love.”

#ahs #ahs imagines #sarah paulson #sarah paulson x reader #wilhemina venable #wilhemina venable x reader #fics

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elius-learns-to-write · 3 years ago

Text

I Guess I wasn’t Worth The Effort

for all my amazing 200 followers <3 y/n is a little bit of a bitch in this and I have no clue why hehe.

Summary: you didn’t trust Tony so he stopped trying

You had a good life

A mum who loved you

Friends who cared about you

It didn’t matter that you didn't know who your dad was

You laughed as you watched your mum try to show MJ and Betty how to knead bread. “Come on put your back into it then” you called from the couch laughing even harder as Betty tried to flick some of the dough in your direction “oh shut up L/n, if you’re so good then do it yourself” MJ glared. It was a day like this you treasured. Days the girls would come over and just spend time with you and your mum, sure you loved spending time with Peter and Ned as well but there was just something bliss about this little group you loved. You were a family. “I don’t think the couch is really comfy” you smirked.

Sure you got curious from time to time but you never pushed the subject

It was the only time your mum ever got defensive

When you talked about him

“Can you at least tell me what he was like! I have a right to know” you shouted, arms waving and pointing, face turning red from frustration in a way that made you look like seom exotic bird doing a mating dance. “Look I know you want to know about him but he really isn’t worth it” your mum tried to reason, she knew you’d want to know about him eventually she just wanted to leave it until the last minute. “Why don’t you let me decide that” you asked, a sense of pleading clear in your voice.

Knock knock knock, your mum’s knuckles lightly tapped the door, she didn’t even wait for an answer before popping her head through the door. You never understood why she did that; knocked to ask for permission but never waited for an answer. “Hey sweetie, look I know you want to know about your dad, it’s just he was never there for me and never tried to support me. I left before he knew I was pregnant. I did it so you wouldn’t have to grow up going through what I did” she sat on the end of the bed, the soft white covers giving her a sense of hope that maybe she could preserve your innocence or rather ignorance over what your father was like. “I understand and I’m sorry I guess I was just interested but now I’m not sure I want to know anymore” you smiled.

You always ended up talking things through though

So over time, with the drip fed information about him your mother gave you, of course you grew to resent the non existent man

The once childish wonder soon vanished

Sure you wanted to know who he was still

But it just didn’t feel worth it

“So you don’t want to know him anymore?” Betty asked, still not getting it because the last time you talked about him you had your heart set on finding out who he was. “It’s not like I don’t want to know him, it’s just that if it didn’t happen I wouldn’t feel sad or let down” you explained, sipping your drink eyes focusing on the other people in the cafe rather than the stare they were both giving you. “And this my friends is why i read about people, so confusing” MJ muttered into her cup a smirk clear on her face

But then it happened

You found out who your dad was

And for some reason you resented him more

“Oh don’t play dumb Tony you know exactly why I didn’t tell you, you and your privileged rich fucking ass didn’t care about me and I didn’t want that to happen to them!” you could hear your mum screaming down the phone, words fueled by years of pain and bitter memories. “Mum? Who is it?” you called walking through the hallway into the room she was currently arguing in “No they’ll decide what they want to do, not you” finger hitting the end call button with so much force you would have thought it would break. “Was that my dad?” you asked the same childhood innocence your mum had wanted to protect seeping into your tone, the same voice you used to ask if your dad was coming to your party at age 5. The same voice that cried when he didn’t show up. The same wide eyes that would stare out the window waiting to see if anyone would turn up on Christmas after you asked Santa for your dad. This was either going to break that little heart of yours or make it blossom into the person you were meant to be. “You know who Tony Stark is right?”.

Of course you’d seen him on the news

Him and his little group of heroes saving the world but destroying cities at the same time

You didn’t hate them, in fact there were people on that team that you held great respect for

Just the ‘let’s splash the cash and party’ attitude Tony seemed to have

Anyway you agreed to meet him

Decide if he was worth it

And what better way to do that then in the tower for dinner

“So what do you like to do kid?” Tony asked watching as you drank the glass of water Steve had poured you earlier “I don’t know normal stuff, I enjoy writing and English but apart from that I don’t know. Doing up old cars is fun'' the man's face lit up at that. At least you were giving him straws to grasp at. “Maybe we could do that together some time?” he asked, hoping to fill his words to the brim until it overflowed into his smile. “Maybe” you shrugged, turning to look at the awkward and polite smiles the rest of the team wore, clearly noticing your discomfort. “So Iced Americano, I heard you draw? That’s pretty cool” trying to diffuse the tension was probably the best way to go but a part of you just wanted to give Tony a sense of hurt he had given you by abandoning you even though it wasn’t his fault. “Uhhh yeah I do, not very good writing though” he chuckled eyes looking at Sam for help on what to say next. “So what do you like to write?” Sam asked.

It went on like that for the next few times you went over there

You didn’t want to hate your dad it was just you were too scared to let him get close

What if he left again?

Your bond grew with the others though

Especially Steve, Sam and Bucky

“Okay now you have to pick up 4” you explained to Bucky who was still confused about how Uno works “Ohhh okay okay” he was drawing the needed cards as Steve spoke from his place on the floor “why do you hate your dad?” What a question for 2 in the afternoon. “I don’t hate him, I just don’t trust him, I grew up waiting for him and he never showed up and now I’m meant to let him into my life and act like the perfect daughter to fix cars and read silly stories to him? I don’t think so” you replied, shaking your head. The one thing you tended to forget about the tower was anyone could hear what you said. Tony could hear what you said and he did it here. That was the start of the end.

After that conversation Tony began to grow distant

Just when you were ready to open up

Starks never did do very well with communication

So your already sketchy relationship got even worse

He didn’t know you trusted him

And you didn’t know he was hurt by your comment

So you stopped going and he stopped picking up

“It’s fine mum I guess I just wasn’t worth trying”

#tony x reader #tony x teen!reader #tony stark imagine #tony x platonic!reader #tony x y/n #the avengers #avengers x platonic reader #avengers x teen!reader #avengers x reader #avengers imagine #steve x teen!reader #bucky x teen!reader #sam wilson x teen!reader #tony x daughter!reader

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s-creations · 3 years ago

Text

Choking on Your Hubris

Raz knows he's cursed. He's experienced that hand reaching up to swipe at him enough time to know he's cursed. To bad Norma doesn't believe him and his own stubbornness lands him in a familiar situation.

_________

Fandom: Psychonauts Rating: General Audience Relationships/Pairings: Nothing major Warnings: Discussion of almost drowning, Quick rescue, Almost losing someone, First work for this Fandom, a ‘what if’ situation.

Idea comes from InkayInks Prompt List.

“How stupid do you think we are?”

Norma’s question cut through the conversation easily. Raz, who had been talking about his family to the other interns, stopped short. Turning to face the pyrokinesis specialist. Who was looking back with a raised brow.

“What?” The ten-year-old asked.

“There are no such things as curses. Psychics have better things to do than to play ‘fortune tellers’. And you know that manipulating someone’s mind is wrong, but that doesn’t make them cursed either. I don’t know why your father poisoned your mind with-”

“He didn’t!” Raz quickly argued back, “He wouldn’t and I’m telling the truth! If I get too close to water, this weird hand thing comes out to try to grab me and pulls me into the water.”

“Yeah...it hurts me to say this, but I’m with Norma on this,” Lizzie said slowly, “It just sounds...weird.”

Adam nodded in agreement as he folded his arms. “Never in my years of research have I ever heard of anything like this. Not curses, no nothing.”

“Are you kidding me? You all were in agreement when I was telling the story.” Raz complained.

“Yeah, before Norma sunk some sense into us,” Gisu replied, “Sorry Raz. It was a good story though.”

“It’s not a story! I’m telling you, I’ll drown by a weird hand if I get anywhere near water!”

Norma stood at that. Towering over Raz as she started him down. “Prove it.”

“W-What?”

“You’re really adamant about this. Show us this so-called ‘curse’.”

“You want me to die?”

“No, I want to see this mysterious hand. Don’t worry your baby head. I’ll make sure you’re safe and step in if it’s too much for you.”

Raz swallowed weakly, biting his bottom lip as he surveyed the room. None of the interns seemed to be willing to come to his rescue. Some even looked curious as well. Eyes flitted back up to Norma. Who’s all knowing smirk only seemed to grow, which only made Raz’s anger out grow his fear.

“Fine.” Said anger he had felt slowly disappeared as they neared the edge of the nearby lake. The murky water rippled innocently as the teens (and child) arrived.

“I thought,” Raz's voice cracked, “we were going to the pool?”

“I told you, you’ll be fine. Besides, where we go shouldn’t matter. Water is water after all. Now, why don’t you go show us your ‘curse’.” Norma said coolly.

“But, what if-”

“Did you lie to us Raz?” Norma’s face changed into false hurt. A hand resting on her chest for dramatic effect. “That’s rude, to lie to your fellow interns.”

Raz felt sick with fear. He didn't want to get anywhere near the murky water. But, he also wanted to prove he wasn’t lying. He tugged at his sleeve, cautiously making his way towards the water. Heart hammering as he stood mere inches from his possibly watery death.

“Well, what are you waiting for?” Norma’s voice broke through the mental panic.

“What?” Raz squeaked out.

“You said you have to be in the water?”

“...Y-Yeah, or at least c-close to it.”

“Well, get on with it then. Unless you were lying and are afraid of being found to be a liar?”

“I’m not lying!”

“You sure are taking your sweet time with this.”

“You would too if this was a life or death situation!”

“Please, don’t be such a drama queen. Just admit you’re lying and we’ll go back inside.”

“Why don’t you just-”

Raz’s reply was cut off, feeling the familiar icy chill constrict his chest. There was a second of seeing the looks of shock and fear of the other interns before his vision turned watery. Arms trapped at his sides, Raz kicked furiously trying to break away. Only for more hands to reach up to hold him further. His last breath of air escaped his lungs and bubbled up to the surface. The light soon faded as he sank lower and consciousness slipped away…

It was like the back of head had been stabbed by a knife made of ice.

Sasha struggled to remain upright. Hand reached out frantically, knocking over some equipment, as he found a perch on the nearby table. The sudden mental shock to the system sent him reeling.

In one second he was being bombarded with emotions of absolute fear and anger, a mental vision of water, and a small cry of ‘Help...me…’.

The next he was teleporting to the lakeside. Finding the group of interns standing by the water’s edge. All pale and scared. Except...one was missing.

“Where is he.” Sasha demanded. Sam merely pointed towards the water.

Wasting no time, the agent dove in. The water was frigid, stinging his exposed skin. It was also difficult to see through it. Dark and filled with debris. He swam downwards as quickly as he could. Trying not to think that Raz might not have been pulled directly straight down. That the child could be anywhere down there. A few seconds in passing was all it took to lose someone.

It was a short moment of relief when Sasha finally spotted Raz. Only for the worry to grow once again seeing the child was passed out. No bubbles leaving him and his skin sickly pale against the dark water. What looked like hands were wrapped around Raz’s lower body, only the head and shoulders seen.

Sasha wasted no time in blasting those hands away. Raz’s form slowed in the descent towards the dirt bottom. The agent moved quickly, grabbing the limp form before the hands could again. With the unmoving body tucked close to his chest, Sasha launched himself upwards to the surface. He gasped for air as he broke the surface. Landing easily on the edge. Ignoring the voices of the worried interns as he laid Raz down. Who was still unmoving.

“Sir-”

“Get Milla and Hollis, now.”

Norma nodded quickly and rushed off.

Sasha tilted Raz’s head back, mouth open, and he started CPR. He tried not to show panic as the seconds passed and Raz didn’t stir. Tried to keep his hands steady as all he could think was how cold the child was. Tried to remain calm as nothing changed and Sasha was sure he was about to lose…

“Darling.” Milla had arrived. Kneeling on the other side of the child, looking terrified.

“He’s not responding.” Sasha said weakly.

“We need to get the water out.”

“I know-”

“Psychically.” Sasha couldn’t argue as his chin was tilted up. Forehead pressed against Milla’s, whose eyes were already closed in concentration. “Focus…”

Letting his shoulders slump, Sasah gave what he could to help. It was difficult at first to find what they were looking for. Sasha was still internally panicking and had to be pulled back by Milla more than once. Only then could they find the unwanted water blocking Raz’s airway. Even so, it was difficult to move the water out. Finding the correct pathway out and not disturbing anything else.

It was a tense few seconds before the water was finally pushed out. Escaping from Raz’s mouth and now hovering as a ball above the violently coughing and gasping child.

“Easy darling, easy.” Milla placed a hand on Raz’s forehead. Trying to calm the frantic child as Sasha tossed the water back into the lake.

“M...M-Milla?”

“Hush Raz, just catch your breath…”

“What is going on here!” Hollis, with Norma in tow, came storming over. Fear hidden by a look of anger.

Sasha replied with, “Raz was drowning. We were just now able to revive him.”

“Take him to medbay and get him out of those wet clothes. We don’t need him getting a head cold after all of this.”

Milla, with Raz resting in her arms, and Sasha returned to the Motherlobe. Hollis turned to the group of interns. Who all shrunk at the hard eye they were given. “I need someone to tell me why the youngest out of all of you was just rescued from drowning.”

Sam broke. “So Raz was telling us about his life and family and he said that they had all been cursed to drown if they were near water. We didn’t believe him, especially when Norma pointed out how strange it was. But Raz was really insistent and so Norma told him to prove it and he technically did! Just...I didn’t think it would be so scary…”

“So, what I’m hearing is that you all deliberately pushed someone, a fellow intern, into a dangerous stunt. Almost killing him?”

“But...Norma-”

“None of you stopped Raz or called out Norma’s behavior. You’re all training to become Psychonauts. But this behavior makes me question if you all are even ready for this level. Your job is to help people, not push them into dangerous situations! If you can’t treat those who are supposed to be your teammates with respect, what about those you’re supposed to be helping.”

That caused all heads to drop in defeat.

“We...should apologize…” Morris offered.

“No, you are not, not right now. You all are going to be scrubbing the inter living quarters. Which you will be spending the next two months. Yes, away from your private quarters. Don’t give me that look, Lizzie. After that, I want a 20,000 word essay about why this was bad and why you won’t be doing this again. Then you will be baking cookies to be delivered to all in the Motherlobe. Finally, you will all have 200 extra hours of training. And then we’ll see if Raz has anything to say about this. ...If he makes it through this.”

_________________________

It was all a blur. Raz was aware he was out of the water (he could breathe again). But he was now freezing, trying to catch his breath, and exhausted. He knew he was being carried by Milla, Sasha nearby, and both were giving off waves of fear.

His vision was unfocused, a ringing in his ear and his hearing muffled, limbs were heavy. Raz let out a small groan as he suddenly shifted. Shivering weakly at losing the warmth that Milla had been given. Someone lifted his helmet off, rubbing a towel over his dripping hair. Letting out a yelp when his jacket and sweater were removed.

“It’s alright Raz, it’s just me.” Sasha’s voice sounded in the younger’s head.

Soon enough, Raz was dressed in dry sleepwear, wrapped in a thick blanket, laying against someone. He assumed it was Sasha. But he wasn’t quite sure.

He winced again when another hand touched his forehead.

“Just the doctor, you’re safe Razputin.”

An overall check resulted in low body temperature, damaged throat, and no doubt on the road to getting a cold. But, at least he wasn’t dead. Hours passed, nightfall arriving before Raz felt somewhat normal. Surprised that Sasha and Milla had remained the entire time, even after Raz was able to sit up on his own.

“Don’t you both have work to do? What about the mission?” Raz asked, his voice quiet. His throat was killing him.

“We can keep an eye on you and work at the same time,” Sasha replied, “We’re quite skillful in multi-tasking.”

“Unless you want us to leave?” Milla asked. To which Raz shook his head. “Then we’ll stay for as long as you want.”

The child smiled weakly at that. Eyes slowly closing as he felt sleep pull at him. Sinking into the overly cushioned bed and pillow, warmth flowing through him and contained by the thick blanket. A kiss was gently placed on his head while a hand gently rubbed the back of his hand.

“Sleep well darling.”

“Get some rest, Razputin.”

The predicted cold arrived hard and heavy. Raz’s throat remained sore, but had a clogged nose and pounding headache added along with it. His days were filled with medicine, soup, and sleep. Lili stopped by as many times as she could.

“First my dad’s sick. Then you’re sick after you almost died. Can things please stop falling apart around me?” She sighed softly. Holding out another spoonful of soup for Raz.

“I didn’t mean to make you worry.” He croaked out.

“Just keep away from the water. And stop listening to those idiot interns.”

“Deal.”

A week and a half later had passed before Raz could leave the medical ward. And only after Hollis, Sasha and Milla agreed that he looked well enough to do so. He was nervous about returning to the working world, being around the interns again. Not sure if he was mentally ready to face them all again. Even if he had Sasha saying to call him if the teens tried anything again.

Raz stopped outside the door marking the intern living quarters. Allowing himself a few seconds to collect his thoughts before pushing his way in. He froze in the doorway as five pairs of eyes snapped up to him. Raz not realizing he would be seeing the interns so quickly, believing they’d be hiding away in their personal rooms. The tense situation broke when Sam pushed away from her marked desk.

“Raz! We didn’t kill you!” She rushed over, instantly pulling the younger into a tight hug.

“C-Can’t...breath…”

“Oh, sorry.”

“Good to see you up and going again.” said Adam, patting Raz’s shoulder as he was released.

“Thanks...I wasn’t expecting to see you all in here.”

“We’re on house arrest...sort of intern arrest?” Morris hummed softly.

Gisu rolled her eyes. “What Morris is trying to say is that Hollis gave us a pretty heavy punishment. Not like we don’t deserve it, mind you.”

“No kidding,” Lizzie added, “Seriously, nothing freaked me out more than seeing you...go under. Are you okay?”

Raz shrugged. “I mean, I’m still here. But I’m still on bed duty for a while. Where’s...um, where’s Norma?”

“Out on the balcony. Brooding.”

“...Is she still upset?”

“At you? No. She’s being hard on herself, as usual.”

“Sorry to break this up, but we should be getting back to work. I don’t want to be under house arrest any longer than I need to.” Morris was the first one to pull away. With the rest following to get back to their desks.

Raz passed by them and out onto the balcony. Where he found Norma, as Lizzie said he would. The small table nearby was covered with numerous scribbled papers, a half finished cup of tea holding down a small pile of them. The intern herself was staring off into the sunset.

“Uh, hi Norma.” Raz said weakly.

She casually looked over before returning her attention towards the horizon. “Good to see you’re alive.”

“Uh, yeah, sure am. Just...wanted to come out and say hi.”

“Well, you’ve done it. So...bravo for you.”

Raz’s shoulders fell in defeat. “Okay, sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you.”

“Raz, wait.” Norma gave a heavy sigh before facing the younger again. “Look, I’m… I am sorry. I still don’t think you’re cured.”

“But-”

“I know, I saw what happened. But curses don’t exist, so I’m not fully sure what happened. However, that’s not the point of this. What I’m trying to say is that I’m sorry for pushing you so far.”

“...You just wanted to see what would happen.”

“That’s not an excuse. You were clearly distressed and you almost died. I don’t know what’s going on. But that shouldn’t cause you to almost lose your life. I need to think about my actions and the outcome for those.”

With that, Norma faced the sky once more and said nothing. Raz took that as the conversation was over and that he needed to leave. So, he did. Walking back into the living quarters and greeted more warmly by the other interns. Laying down on his marked bed, he felt a comforting pulse come from Sasha and Milla. For now, it was fine. Raz just wondered how long that would last with this group.

#psychonauts #razputin aquato #sasha nein #milla vodello #s-creations #fanfiction

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shyficwriter · 4 years ago

Text

You Laugh, You lose

Guardians of the Galaxy fanfic | Reader x Yondu, Kraglin, Peter

Summary: You're stuck on planet until morning when a part fails on Yondu's M-ship, so Peter suggests a game to pass the time.

Author’s Note: This is the fluffy/funny fic I promised to make up for the two angsty fics before it. Hope you like it! Also shoutout to @badjokesbyjeff where I got most of these jokes from.

Word Count: 3,100

One rule.

You laugh. You lose.

Ok, maybe there were a couple more rules than that, but that was the gist.

It was a game often played between you and Peter, and occasionally also with Yondu or Kraglin on long job travels to kill the boredom.

The goal? Make the other person laugh. If you succeed, you win. You fail, then the game continues until someone loses it and laughs. Winner gets bragging rights, loser usually has to buy a round of drinks for the rest.

The game had originally started out with the one rule, but over time a couple more rules had been added. One of these rules was that stuff like tickling was cheating. You'd think this would have been an obvious rule to start with, but when it was you losing the game to tickles, Peter didn't mind. Less competition, right? But once the tables were turned and he lost a round, then suddenly tickling was "major cheating" and "totally unfair!" So, naturally, now there was a "no touching" rule during the game.

Another rule that needed to be added later was that Yondu couldn't gibberish talk his way to a win. It just gave him too much of an unfair advantage over you and Kraglin, who would crack up very quickly upon being face to face with a deadpan Yondu talking to you in pure nonsense. Peter was the only one of you three not really effected by it, as he found it more annoying than anything else.

Of course, Yondu tried to use his status as captain to veto this rule, but after a vote of 3-1 against the gibberish, he finally relented, stating that, "Aw, fine! I don't need to do that to win anyway!"

However, this didn't stop him from slipping a little in from time to time, always claiming he "forgot."

Sure, Yondu. Sure.

That was pretty much the main rules. The rest were more just guidelines. Like, smiling was allowed, as it didn't count as laughing, but too sharp of an exhale out your nose while smiling could be considered a laugh. Stuff like that.

Today happened to be one of those days where a job had run long, or rather, the trip did.

The job actually went fairly smoothly, to Yondu's surprise. However, when it was all said and done and it was time to leave, the ship wouldn't start.

Luckily, Yondu knew a guy who could fix the problem (just something minor with the fuel intake, but at the same time not something that Yondu could fix without replacing a part he didn't have and certain tools he didn't bring with him.) Only problem was the guy couldn't get the part in until the morning.

So you were all stuck there. Until morning. On a patch of the planet that wasn't within reasonable walking distance of anything fun. Plus it was raining, so you were all more or less confined to the ship for the evening.

Great.

So that's why Peter proposed a game of You Laugh You Lose.

At first Yondu didn't want to, being grumpy about being stranded for the night over such a minor fix and all, but Kraglin managed to convince him in hopes it would lift his spirits.

Now, playing with four people was a little different than one on one. With two people you'd sit facing your opponent and take turns trying to make the other laugh. When starting with four you all sat around the table, each person taking a turn in attempts to get any of the other three to laugh. If someone cracks, regardless of who made them laugh, they're out, and can act as referees, or mildly help crack the others if they choose. Also, instead of the just first to lose owing everyone a round a drinks, all three losers would owe a round, pretty much ensuring the winner 3 free drinks the next time they went out.

Peter sat directly in front of you at the small table, with Yondu to your left and Kraglin sitting directly in front of him. The four of you took a second to fully compose yourselves, making your faces as expressionless as possible, and then Peter started.

He stared you dead in the eye. "Why do bees hum?" he asked, waiting a moment, more for comedic timing than an actual answer, as was how many of the jokes told in the game went. When no one spoke up he said, "Because they don't know the words."

You exhaled slowly through your nose and shook your head, the known sign for, "That the best you got?"

Kraglin's turn now. He took a different approach. He crossed his eyes and in a deadpan voice said, "Wanna hear a joke about a piece of paper?"

Yondu raised an eyebrow, but shook his head when Kraglin continued, "Never mind, it's tearable." Peter made the universal noise for having heard a bad joke.

Your turn. "What did the A'askavariian say after a bad night out?"

"What?" asked Kraglin.

"Wouldn't know. You should ask Peter."

Peter made a scandalized noise. "One time!"

You saw Yondu's mouth twitch, but he quickly recovered. Kraglin took a deep breath and exhaled to keep it together.

Yondu's turn. He told another joke at Peter's expense, and actually made himself crack a smile when Peter protested again. You and Kraglin fought back grins as Peter took his turn.

"What's Beethoven's favorite fruit?"

The three of you shake your heads, though in Yondu and Kraglin's case you were sure it was more because they didn't know who Beethoven was. This was then confirmed by Kraglin asking, "Who's that?"

Peter didn't answer the question, instead letting out a, "Ba-na-NA-NA!"

Peter said this so suddenly and loudly that even Yondu jerked his head back in startled surprise, as did Kraglin, but Kraglin also had to stop himself from barking out a startled laugh. You, however, had to try much harder to keep yourself from laughing. It wasn't even that good of a joke, but his delivery had you biting your tongue to keep it together. Yondu didn't get the joke, but assumed it likely would have been real funny on Terra as he watched you try to steady your breathing just as Kraglin took his turn.

"Ya know the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer? ... The taste."

That one received a collective groan and a look of disgust from you and Peter. Yondu looked almost impressed as he shook his head.

It was your turn again. "I once watched a documentary on how ships are kept together. It was... riveting." You wiggled your eyebrows on the punchline, but only received a mock-disappointed stare from the others at your awful pun.

Instead of a joke, Yondu decided on his next turn to tell a story. "One time we were on a job on Krylor," he began, "and a pretty lil' miss thing caught Peter's eye..."

Peter's eyes widened. He had a bad feeling about which story Yondu was about to tell. "Yondu, don't." he warned flatly.

Yondu only grinned and ignored him "He goes sauntering up to her, trying to be all smooth like.."

"Yondu, seriously." Peter warned again. Again, Yondu ignored him. By now you and Kraglin were already grinning from Peter's reaction alone.

"But the boy ain't watchin' where he's goin', he slips on an empty soda can and falls flat on his face right in front of her. But that's not the best part-"

"I will seriously kill you, ya blue dick!" Peter was getting so red and flustered you had to bite your tongue, as did Kraglin who's nostrils where flaring with the effort.

"It had rained that mornin', and he had been just unlucky enough to land on a puddle, and when he stood up it looked like he'd gone and done pissed himself. I don't think I need to say he didn't wind up gettin' the girl."

That broke Kraglin. He snorted a laugh and Yondu clapped his hands together, shouting, "Gotcha! Yer out!"

Kraglin groaned out a, "I don't know why those stories always get me!" but sat back grinning anyways as Peter buried his scarlet face in his hands whining, "So uncool!"

Peter composed himself and glared at Yondu. "Alright. What about that time you accidentally switched the intercom on while listening to that Brittany Spears music from Terra?"

Yondu just stared at him stonily, no hint of emotion, refusing to dignify the story with a response, although you almost thought you could see his face slightly darken. Kraglin, even though he was out, pretended to be very interested in the table and after an awkward beat you decided to take your turn, because there's no way you'd let yourself laugh at Yondu's music choices if you knew what was good for you.

"SO- Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now." you say in an attempt to bring the game back to jokes lest you be the next one they decide to dredge up an embarrassing story about.

Yondu turned his attention to you. "Ya know, I think the toilet has anger issues," he said. You gave him a confused look and he continued, "Whenever I flush it, it completely loses its shit."

You fight a smile. Peter does the same despite himself still being cranky about Yondu's previous story. Kraglin, however, openly giggles at the joke.

Peter quickly steadies his breathing and says, "There were once two guys flying a ship in dead space. One turns to his buddy and says: 'Damn, I can’t find any milk for my coffee.' His friend replies: 'In space no one can, here use cream.'"

You raised an eyebrow in confusion momentarily before throwing your head back with a groan as you got the joke. "That's a terrible joke!" you say, allowing yourself to grin.

"But you wanna laugh, don't you?" Peter teased.

You playfully glare at him and take your turn instead of answering. "Which is heavier, 200 lbs of feathers, or 200 lbs of bricks?"

Now Yondu raised an eyebrow. "They'd weigh the same, kid."

You try not to grin as you shake your head. "Nah. It's the feathers, because you also have to carry the weight of what you did to those poor birds."

Yondu propped his elbow on the table and half-hid his grin behind his hand as he nodded his head in approval, before being mildly startled by the sound of a laugh escaping Peter's gritted teeth. Yondu joyfully slapped the table and pointed at Peter. "Yer out too, boy!"

"Aw, dammit!" Peter cried out, but he wasn't angry anymore. He followed Kraglin's lead and relaxed in his chair knowing he was now able to laugh freely at any corny jokes that came.

Yondu smirks at you. "And then there were two."

Crap. You had really been hoping you wouldn't need to square up against him alone. He was really good at this game, and rarely broke. You, however, always had to fight super hard against turning into a giggly little mess, and usually lost. There was just something about his ability to deliver the jokes with a completely deadpan or stern face that always broke you, but this time you were going to try your best to avoid that.

"I was kidnapped by mimes once." he said, "They did unspeakable things to me."

You inhaled deeply, and let it out slowly, shaking your head as you did so and giving a look that said 'Damn you.' "What’s the difference between an amateur thief and a professional thief?" you begin, continuing after a beat, "The amateur thief says, 'Give me all your money!' The professional thief says, 'Sign here please.'"

Yondu nodded his head thoughtfully. "That's actually pretty accurate. Not sure that's even a joke..." he grinned, almost taunting you at the inability to draw a laugh from him. His turn now. "Two burglars are robbin' a liquor store. One turns to the other an' asks, 'Is this whiskey?' The other replies, “Yeah, but not as wisky as wobbing a bank.” Of course, this last line was delivered with a clean slate of emotion, your weakness.

Fuck.

You had to turn your head away from him as you fought to keep your breathing in check, your lips pressed together, threatening to betray you.

"Ay Ay! No looking away you coward!" Peter laughed, prompting you to face him instead. You flipped him off, your grin finally splitting your face.

"There it is! Come on, you know ya wanna laugh." Yondu teased, grinning at how your nostrils flared when you turned back to glare at him. An unconvincing glare, but it was the best you could manage.

After a couple deep breaths with your hands balled into fists you thought you had calmed down enough to take your turn. "I yelled “COW!” at a woman on a bike once. She flipped me off and then ran straight into the cow..." You raised your hands and shrugged your shoulders in mock exasperation. "I tried!"

Peter laughed while Kraglin and Yondu just shared an amused glance.

"Ya know, I might've actually found that funny... if I knew what a cow was." Yondu taunted, grinning as your shoulders fell in realization.

That made Peter snort, probably for no other reason than he now just had a case of the giggles. But the look on your face was probably part of it. His snort in turn made you grin, his laughter contagious.

This gave Yondu an idea. Grinning evilly he reached over to poke Peter in the side, making the younger man jerk almost violently away with a giggle. Kraglin chuckled as Peter protested, "Hey! You know that's cheating!"

"Nah, you're out, boy. There ain't no rule that says I can't use it on someone that's outta the game." Yondu argued playfully, throwing a look at Kraglin who took the hint and poked Peter from the other side.

"Hey!" Peter whined, the pitiful sound making you cover your mouth to hide your widening grin.

Kraglin stood so he could tickle Peter properly, seeing your amusement at his predicament, and you clenched your jaw as streams of your friend's laughter mixed with uncharacteristically high pitched, "No!"s and "Please!"s poured from his mouth before he managed to escape Kraglin's grip and hop away from the table, clutching his sides and catching his breath. Just in time too, because you were worried that might've actually broken you if Peter hadn't stopped his girly ticklish squeals.

Yondu must've realized this too because he snapped his fingers in mock frustration, and conceded that it was your turn again. In truth he was glad Peter got away as well. The plan had almost backfired on him, nearly having made him laugh at the sight as well.

You had to restart your joke twice, each time having to stop yourself from accidentally laughing so you wouldn't lose. Eventually you finally got out, "Guy with a gun enters a bar... He cries out angrily: 'Who the fuck had sex with my wife?'... A voice was heard in the background, "You don’t have enough bullets mate!”

Yondu grinned, looking down at the table before nodding. "I like that one. It's good." However, he didn't laugh, just went straight into his next joke. "Nurse hands a man his newborn and says 'I’m sorry, but your wife didn’t make it.' He hands it back, saying, 'Well give me the one my wife made.'"

Your eyes went wide. "Yondu!" you scold. "That's terrible!"

"Don't give me that! I can see ya fighting not to laugh."

It was true. As much as the joke was bad, you couldn't help it. There's nothing that makes someone want to laugh more than knowing you can't laugh. Everything's funnier when you can't laugh. You roll your eyes and deliver your next joke. "Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road? ... It got stuck in a crack."

Peter cracked up at that, moving to sit back down with a warning glance at Kraglin, who held up his hands as a sign that he wasn't going to tickle him again. Kraglin then shook his head with a wide grin as he watched Yondu run his tongue over his teeth and look down as he tried to suppress a smile.

Yondu inhaled. "Damn. Ya almost got me."

You grinned wide and bit your tongue. You almost got yourself.

"Ya wanna hear a joke 'bout construction?"

You let out a dramatic sigh. "You're gonna tell it anyway, might as well."

"I'm still workin' on it."

You smack your hand on your thigh and jerk your head to the side as your breath hitched. "Fuck you!" you say, a wide grin plastered to your face.

Now Peter and Kraglin were laughing at yours and Yondu's reactions more than anything else.

"Ya wanna tap out now? There's no shame if ya do." Yondu teased.

"Fuck you." you say again. "What did the plumber say to the singer?" You cursed yourself for not being able to come up with a better joke, but delivered the punch-line anyway. "Nice pipes."

Yondu didn't even crack a smile a that, not that you blamed him. He asked, "What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke?"

"I don-"

"TIMING!" Yondu shouted so suddenly that you jerked back and a startled laugh finally broke free from your throat, and once it was out it was like a dam had collapsed- you couldn't hold back the torrent of giggles that had built up for so long.

"Dude! You can't just yell stuff out like that!" you scold, still giggling as you held a hand to your heart, "You scared me!"

"Made ya laugh though, that's what counts." he grinned. He stood up from the table and stretched. "Looks like I win." He ruffled your hair and you swatted him away playfully.

"One of these days I'll get you!" you say.

"Then why don't ya put your money where your mouth is," Kraglin laughed, Peter nodding with him, saying, "Yeah, you two face off again. Right now. Loser pays for everyone's drinks for the night next time we go out."

Still giggly you glance from Peter and Kraglin to a smug looking Yondu standing and grinning at you with his arms crossed.

With a giggly sigh you bow your head and concede. "I can't. I'm not ready."

Yondu lets out a chuckle and pulls you in to give you a noogie. "That's what I thought."

#gotg #gotg fanfiction #you laugh you lose #yondu fanfiction #yondu #peter quill #kraglin #x reader #starlord #reader is a ravager #yondu udonta #kraglin obfonteri #fluff #fluffy fanfiction #funny #jokes

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chaoticrumii · 3 years ago

Text

A LITTLE MORE THAN FRIENDSHIP

summary : kazunari seems odd, and although he denies it, you see right through his lies. the falsehood of his own existence is eating away at him, and as a good friend, you do your best to try and assist him.

genre : fluff

perspective : second person pov

pairing : kazunari miyoshi x gn!reader ( they / them pronouns )

word count : 1.5k

warnings : spoilers for kazunari miyoshi’s backstory

“ director-chan~ ♪ ! looking forward to work today too ☆ ” - kazunari miyoshi ( introduction voice lines )

You had always believed that Kazunari had something to hide. Not in the shady sense, but something was definitely off about him. It wasn’t in the way he laughed, nor in the way that he would grin and wave at almost all the people walking down the street.

Those were just his quirky qualities, weren’t they? Yet again, maybe not. It was hard to tell in the midst of all his hellos and goodbyes whenever he would meet up with you, and the constant texting to other friends on his phone. The way he would act was normal for someone with connections like his, but something was itching in the back of your mind.

It’s strange, it’s strange, it’s strange.

It bothered you immensely, although you had told yourself you would leave it alone. One day when the two of you were hanging out in a cafe, you just couldn’t keep all the questions in.

“Hey Kazunari, are you okay?” You asked.

He looked up at you from his phone, and cocked his head to the side questioningly.

“What do you mean, Y/N? I’m completely fine! Thank you for worrying about me though!” He said, grinning with that smile of his.

“No. There’s definitely something you’re hiding from me.” You pushed, crossing your arms over your chest.

Kazunari’s face morphed into one of confusion, his brows furrowing as he brought his cup up to his lips and sipped on his drink. He placed it back onto the small coffee table with a tiny clang, looking you dead in the eyes.

“I’m really okay, Y/N. There’s nothing wrong with me, and I hope you don’t continuously worry about me like this.” He said quickly.

You didn’t believe it for a second, but then again, you couldn’t really describe how weird he had been acting ever since you’d first met. It was still an enjoyable experience though, and you thoroughly wished you could get to know him even better than you currently did. Hopefully one day you’d be able to gently tug that secret he was hiding out of him.

“Anyway, do you wanna go anywhere? You promised me a day of friendly fun together, right?” You asked, slumping back into the soft armchair.

“You can decide! I’m good with any place you want to head to.” Kazunari said, typing on his phone again.

“But like, do you wanna go anywhere? I don’t really have anything in my brain right now, but I want to go somewhere exciting.” You said, waving your fist in the air, imaging a large rollercoaster that you and Kazunari could ride together.

“Well, it would be cool if we... you know what, you can make the choice. It’s me who invited you to hang out, and I really don’t mind where we go to!” He said again, waving his hands in front of him, shrugging it off.

Like you had thought previously, his behavior was only getting increasingly strange by the second. It was still worrying, and since you didn’t seem to be getting anywhere with what you were attempting to do. Instead, it seemed better to take a different approach. You pushed yourself out of your chair, grabbing your bag and slinging it over your shoulder.

“Well, I think I’ll head home for today. It was nice seeing you!” You said, walking out the door, leaving Kazunari dumbfounded as he sat there in the cafe.

Of course, before leaving you slipped a few bucks into his jacket. It wouldn’t seem right to leave him to pay for your drink as well. It wasn’t that you wanted to stand him up like that, but if you wanted him to open up about what he was hiding, he’d have to do it on his own, and willingly so. Maybe it just wasn’t the right time for it.

First thing the next morning, you had received a text from the one, the only Kazunari☆. He had asked you to meet him in a few days at an arcade. It was slightly strange, since he never showed a large interest in playing games at all, other than the occasional Mahjong game with some of his friends he’d invite over. You couldn’t really remember any of them other than one called Citron, who seemed to wrongly pronounce and speak a lot of Japanese words. It was hilarious though, and you’d enjoyed conversing with him when the Mahjong sessions would occur.

You couldn’t stop thinking about how Kazunari had acted in the few days between when you were going to see him again. What was he hiding? From how he was acting it was plainly obvious that something was going on. It was just a matter of what it was. Of course, you planned to accept it regardless of what he told you, and as time ticked by, you silently hoped it wasn’t something illegal.

The day had come for when you were going to meet Kazunari at the arcade he had sent an address to on your phone. It was a rather old arcade, and a lot of the games seemed to come from a decade ago. At least that was what you could see from the outside of the shop. Who knew Kazunari was into this kind of stuff?

“Boo.”

You turned to feel arms wrapping around your middle, hands squeezing tightly around your waist and a familiar chuckle emitting from the tall, green eyed boy behind you. Kazunari was wearing his hat and classic THREE THREE THREE shirt, and he was wearing a small smile on his face as he grabbed your hand.

“Come on, we’re playing Mario Kart.”

“Is there any reason why you brought me here? Didn’t know you were into this kind of stuff, and even if you were, you never told me.” You asked, tilting your head to the side as he dragged you through the aisles and aisles of arcade games, to stop at the large Mario Kart set-up.

“I used to really like these back in middle school, but I stopped for a while because I was bullied for being a nerd.” He said, a sad smile etching across his features.

“Wait, Kazunari-”

“Regardless, let’s play a few rounds. If you can beat me, I’ll tell you the full story.” He said, smirking mischievously as he placed his hands on the wheel in front of him.

“You’re on.”

And so, the fight ensued. After multiple rounds of intense mushroom consumption and shell throwing, you had won two out of five matches. You sighed to yourself, feeling the failure sink in slowly. You wouldn’t even be able to hear about what he had to say this way. You were only a few seconds off.

“I really was thinking you were going to beat me, Y/N. Still, I’ll tell you all about what happened.” He said, tapping you lightly on your defeated figure, which bounded up the moment he had said that.

“In short, I fabricated a lot about myself, and my own life to fit the people I wanted to impress. People just thought that was my personality, befriending others and being an overall very popular person. I didn’t think anyone would ever pick up on the fact that I was lying to all of my friends. Some of them, to an extent, aren’t even my friends. Certain relationships I have are quite shallow, to say the least, and I can’t help but feel guilty that they are so. Still, I was able to grow close to you.” He said, looking towards you with a grateful smile, one that made his eyes twinkle as he gazed at you.

“It was something strange that had urged me to become closer to you, and I didn’t really know what it was. I guess now I know. You were able to see through the facades I had put up and see me for me. And I thank you for that, truly.”

Kazunari leaned his forehead onto yours from where he was seated on the machine, his hat in his hands, fiddling with it slowly as he closed his eyes and simply felt you next to him. Your heart was beating at 200 miles per hour, and you let a smile spread across your face.

“No problem...?” You mumbled, unsure of what to reply with.

He laughed, a hearty laugh that echoed through the silent arcade, only faint grunts and the clicking of keys in the background.

“I want to get to know you better, Y/N.” He whispered, grasping your hand in his.

“In the friendship kind of way?” You stuttered, silently letting loose a slew of curse words that you had managed to stutter while talking to him.

“Mm, maybe a little more than friendship.”

written = 20.07.2021

proofread = 23.07.2021

#kazunari miyoshi #kazunari miyoshi x y/n #kazunari miyoshi x reader #a3!#a3! kazunari #act! addict! actors!#one shots #imagines #summer troupe #fluff #fanfiction #ru's fanfictions #ru's imagines

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maryniss · 3 years ago

Text

burn the letters so that you never find the burn in my heart

‘Today I came back. And I hope that you are still somewhere there, I am still here waiting. I am going to search for you, so just stay there and also wait for me. I am still your most devoted believer.’

Hua Cheng looked over at his horrible calligraphy, feeling rage burn deep inside him. He didn’t want to blame himself, he knew that he was still a little weak, proof in how his hands were shaking uncontrollably, proof in how his head was spinning with the past events, with the past feelings that the death of his soul couldn’t wash away. He wanted to burn it all, his love and his hatred because he felt so confused, and he felt so unworthy, unworthy of even worshipping the god of his life.

He could die a million times more and he still wouldn’t know if His Highness would feel the love Hua Cheng himself had felt when Xie Lian caught him during the parade. He wants to show Xie Lian just how much that meant for him, how his heart and will to live were light up, fireworks to mirror the ones Hua Cheng associated with the Crown Prince.

It was the first time somebody looked at Hua Cheng like that. It was the first time when a glance didn’t stab his bloody soul that had been cut and torn to pieces so many times again and again and again; it was the first time Hua Cheng thought that he maybe wasn’t that bad, that he maybe was worth something, that he could now maybe find a meaning to his life.

He knows he didn’t ask for that much, yet why does it feel like two deaths weren’t enough to show Xie Lian his utmost devotion?

He could not put it into words, he could not show it with his actions. Then what was left for him do to?

‘I don’t know what to do, but I’ll continue to follow you even with my eyes closed.’

––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––

‘It was only the moment when I died, that was the moment when I saw you looking at me from the other side of the field. It was dark and maybe I didn’t see it right, maybe the glint in your eye wasn’t worry, but I like to think that at that moment you looked at me and you felt the love that exploded once my body which contained it disappeared. Even a ray of it would have been enough, a fraction for you to know that you are not alone, that there is somebody still believing in you.’

Hua Cheng was somehow relieved that his handwriting was so ugly and that no one could actually understand it. He rested his head on the paper and he thought that he could hear a breath somewhere far away, whispering soft words he could not understand in his ear. How warm he felt at that moment!

But then why was he crying and dirtying the pages he tried so hard to write? Why couldn’t he control his face? From under his eyepatch, trails of blood fell down on the words and mixed in with the ink.

He felt so alone. He wanted to feel again loved and worthy of something.

‘I, will never leave your side, for which I know how it is to be left in the dark with only the dogs of your thoughts to bite and scratch at you over and over.’

It was cold. It was empty.

Hua Cheng could wait for the sun to shine, though. He knew that, at some point, golden streaks of light will set his heart’s fire up once again.

‘I don’t know what to do, but I’ll continue to follow you even with my eyes closed.’

‘Today I cried. For no reason at all. It’s getting tiring. There are too many things to do, all at once, there is so much pressure that I can’t handle. I have to be perfect in their eyes or else they won’t accept me as their leader. I have to scare them off, I have to be the strongest.

But it is so, so hard to scare somebody when you can’t even look at your own reflection without wanting to punch it so hard, to shatter the mirror and never see that face again. I am getting scared of myself, what should I do?

I am still following you. I haven’t found you, but one day I will and I will make sure that you will never have such bad thoughts about yourself as I do.’

Hua Cheng folded the letter and stacked it next to the other letters that have been growing over the years. He had been writing to His Highness for over 200 years, but he never found him, he never caught a glimpse of that brightness again.

He wondered if that’s how Xie Lian felt. He wondered if that was the pressure Xie Lian felt daily, the weight of a smile that hanged hard above his shoulders, pulling the corners of his mouth down. How did he deal with all of this, alone, on his own…?

Hua Cheng tried to be there for him. He did everything he could, he tried so hard, but he in the end failed. If His Highness is still out there in the world, does he know that he is still not alone? Does he know that? And if he would, would it help revive some of the pain that built inside of his rose shaped soul?

Hua Cheng wants to be there with Xie Lian, every day, at any time, whenever he is needed. He wants to at least have the chance to worship his god properly. Is that really too much to ask?

He guesses maybe it is. Maybe he doesn’t deserve that. Maybe he had already used up all of his chances.

He rests on the bed in Paradise Manor, falling asleep with the thought of bringing Xie Lian there one day.

‘Today was such a great day! I saw a white flower and I thought of you again. Its petals were so delicate when I looked at them, holding up big tears of rain; I picked it up and I brought it back home. I put it below the altar and I still hope that one day I can find you again, maybe just by chance, as I did with this flower.’

That was the only letter Hua Cheng still had after somebody sneaked in and stole his chest with treasures. It was during one of his moments of weakness, when his head was throbbing with unbearable pain and his eye could no longer concentrate enough to connect with the butterflies.

He didn’t care about all of the gold and jewelry that was there; but the letters, the letter were so important to him, it was his whole soul on thin papers, written in an ugly and unreadable handwriting, a reflection of his feelings and mind.

Those were only for Xie Lian to see. And he wanted nothing more than for them to find him.

Hua Cheng continued to write after that incident happened, he wrote everything that felt important to him. It was weird to think that he found comfort in exposing his soul to a person that was not there, to a person that might not be there anymore even.

He could hope still. He dedicated his life to Xie Lian, was there anything left other than hope?

When the vendor offered Xie Lian those pieces of paper, he was reluctant to take them. He had no need for such objects, so why would he?

“Here, take them, please, I don’t know what to do with them. These are some letters, and some of them seem to be so old, yet the handwriting is the same. Please, take them, I don’t want the one who wrote these letters to come after me!”

Xie Lian wondered why the man stole them still? But such questions never left his mouth and after a lot of pleading, even begging by Xie Lian’s feet, the past god ended up with a pile of letters almost as tall as him. There were a lot and he, not knowing what do, stood down under the shadow of a tree and opened the first one.

It felt like his eyes had been gouged out with a fork. How could anybody have such a handwriting, such a messy handwriting? His head started to hurt as he looked at the letters on the paper. He looked at the words splayed unruly across the page, starting to distinguish some of the characters. The first letter he opened was nothing like he ever read or hear before. It almost seemed like the person who wrote it was talking to their lover after not being with them for a long time.

He started to get accustomed with the writing and soon he could easily read what was written there.

‘I didn’t know it would be this hard. To live. I was foolish back then, but looking at it now, I still don’t regret listening to you. It would just be so, so much easier if you were here. I can handle it still.

But there is no day that I don’t think about you. The warmth I felt when I met you for the first time; it burned me, it was the first time I felt like that. I told you this before in previous letters, but I need to show you, even by repeating my words a hundred times, how much I owe you.

I often find myself asking what you would do if you were in my place. I still hope one day we will find the solution together.

And I am sure we will, as I still follow you, even with my sight not as good as before.’

Xie Lian laughed at the last bit for a second, before wondering what happened to the person’s eyes. It was endearing, there was something about the letters that made Xie Lian want to open more of them up and read them, to find out the secrets hidden between the walls of that thorny writing.

But, as he swam through the emotions exposed there, he felt like he should give some of his story too, to reciprocate the accidental sincerity he was being faced with. He took a coal from his sleeve and started gently writing on the back of those pages.

‘I am glad that you think your love is still worth fighting for. In this world, you must always have something that makes you go forward. It’s just so much easier. I-I remember how I once told someone to keep living for me.

Now that I think about it, it really was foolish of me and too much to ask. I was young back then, I didn’t know how easily trust could be betrayed and how easily people left. I am still thinking about it till this day. I am thinking about that person that listened to my words so carefully and I wonder what he’s doing right now. Truth to be told, I would want to meet them again, to apologize to them. I don’t know if they are still around though.

I want to tell you something, as I’ve seen you struggling. I know it’s hard without somebody by your side; but you can fight for them if that’s what you want to do. Continue on fighting even if you start to bleed, if that’s what is the right thing to do or so you appreciate.

Maybe I am not the best to talk about this. I was stubborn when I was young and I always tried to fulfill my goal, to never give up. And I ended all alone, but I managed.’

Xie Lian stopped for a second and looked up. Clouds were gathering above his head, but something told him it wasn’t going to rain. He let out a soft chuckle and then a sigh.

‘I honestly don’t remember so much of my teenage years. I wanted to save the people all of them, that’s how I was thinking back then. I know it’s not possible, but I am still trying to this day. I can never let it go; it’s just my guilt creeping up on me for letting all of those people die back then.

I remember that there was once a ghost that helped me when I was at my lowest. I couldn’t save them in the end, I couldn’t and that has haunted me for more than I can remember. I wake up in cold sweat remembering how I couldn’t, at the end of it all, save them. There were other people before that that I couldn’t reach out to. But my memory has caved itself and everything from that period is a little blurry. I still remember some things…to well even, things I wish I could forget.’

A drop of water landed on the paper and Xie Lian didn’t know if it was his tears or the rain that started contrary to what he believed. He folded the letters and run quickly back to his improved home in the village, to hide from the rain.

It wasn’t so bad, talking to somebody who would listen. Shame they were not there.

It was a rainy day at Puqi Shrine when Xie Lian found that letter again. It fell from the sleeves of his robes and he picked it up curiously. Where did that come from?

“What did you find there, gege?” Hua Cheng peeked over Xie Lian’s shoulder, nestling his chin in the crook of his neck. It was still something new for them both, and at the same time, something that they were long used to, each other’s presence.

“I am not sure, San Lang, let me take a look.” He unfolded the paper, holding it gently, feeling that it may disappear under his hands if he handled it without care. Xie Lian was met with Hua Cheng’s messy writing and he was confused for a second.

“San Lang, did you write this now…” He could not finish his thoughts as he read the first words; they seemed so familiar, a mirror made out of water which his arm could only pass through. Why did he suddenly feel surrounded by a warmth enveloping him like honey, smothering over him, cradling him close? Was this…?

Hua Cheng took the letter from Xie Lian’s hands. “Gege, where do you have this from?” Xie Lian looked as surprised as him.

“I thought you wrote it? Shouldn’t you know? Didn’t you put it there?” Hua Cheng flipped it over and his eyes roamed the back of the paper.

“…but this is your writing here?” said Hua Cheng as he handed the paper to Xie Lian. The Crown Prince glanced at it and he remembered.

He remembered the vendor that wouldn’t let him alone no matter what, he remembered the cloudy day and how he cried that day. It struck him, all of sudden and he could not stop himself from putting the pieces together. He looked up at Hua Cheng.

“Did you…Were these letters meant for me?” Hua Cheng glanced down, red in the ears, and Xie Lian was stunned that something like this could make him flush so darkly. He smiled fondly.

He loved him.

“Gege shouldn’t look anymore,” murmured he as he stepped out with the intention to take the letter away from Xie Lian, as far away as possible, burn it afterwards so that Xie Lian never found the burn in his heart. “They are unfit to be read by Gege. I was just saying nonsense there, don’t worry about it…”

“But if I can’t look once more time, again, at San Lang’s words, neither can he read my response,” said Xie Lian promptly. Hua Cheng took in a deep breath, something gleaming in his eyes. Hope, love, or just the stars that could be seen splattered across the sky?

“Gege’s…response?” Xie Lian smiled again and started to read aloud what he wrote that time, under the alone shadow of a tree. His face was getting a little bit pink, he knew it, but Hua Cheng was way worse than him, almost as red now as his robes.

When he finished reading, he looked up and to his surprise, tears were rolling down Hua Cheng’s reddened cheeks. He stepped closer and ensured one of his arms behind his beloved’s waist, keeping him close, the other hand wiping away the tars gently, stroking the pale skin there.

“I am sorry, gege…” Hua Cheng took Xie Lian’s hand into his and tenderly kissed it. “I just…Back then I didn’t expect you to be alive, I…” He let out a shaky breath. “It’s just… I don’t know how to say to say it but I feel like I gained another part of myself right now. I feel so full. I am so happy. I always wanted to show you these letters. Yes, I did wrote them down for you and I…” Xie Lian brushed his lips across Hua Cheng’s erratic ones, shutting him up.

“I remember reading the letters and thinking…” Xie Lian’s eyes glanced down at Hua Cheng’s mouth and he thought about all of the words that came out of it, about all of the kisses laid on his skin with that mouth (his face got a closer to red) about everything that Hua Cheng ever said to him and how those simple words hold him up for so long.

“…that they were probably for the lover of the one who was writing. I never thought they would turn out to be for me.” He could see Hua Cheng shivering as his hot breath gasped over the cold skin. And maybe that was love, hope or maybe just the stars reflected in his eyes.

He leaned down and kissed Hua Cheng, slow, molding their lips together, not pushing too far. It was a sweet moment draped in even sweeter honey. He wanted to say so much to Hua Cheng but his mouth would get tired of all the unspoken words his soul had to carry alone.

But, he never grew tired of kissing Hua Cheng. Of the striking feeling that that man was him to kiss and love and adore and exchange secret letters. It was a feeling that bathed him completely, almost drowned him in his magnitude.

Hua Cheng shyly licked at Xie Lian’s lips and the Crown Prince slightly parted them, letting his beloved explore him once more time, like the first time. It was always going to be like the first time.

Words were not enough.

Kissed were not enough.

So how could the two possibly show their love for each other?

Maybe it should be a secret, maybe it should be a surprise like the letters.

Or maybe they should wait for the burn in their heart to heal sot that their soul could once again feel as light as once. Then, they could share their love and fill each other’s hearts.

But, for tonight, kissing didn’t seem so bad. They had an eternity ahead of them.

An eternity and a death. And it still didn’t seem enough.

‘I don’t know what to do, but I’ll continue to follow you even with my eyes closed.’

and they were infinite like the stars in the sly, they were infinite because of the path their loved set ahead of them

reblog if you enjoyed it!

#hua cheng #xie lian #hualian #hualian fic #fluff #tgcf fluff #tgcf fic

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i-need-air · 4 years ago

Note

OKAY OKAY I'M READY I'M SO HAPPY!!CONGRATS FOR 200 AND IMMA STOP SCREAMING! I love your content so much i 👉👈 Could you write soft married hc for Aizawa? I loved the Hawks ones so mcuh and MERRY CHRISTMAS

I just realized I never wrote anything about Aizawa and I just stared into distance silently for some good minutes because the audacity I have, I'm—

I'm so happy that you're happy and thank youuu 💕 I really loved these soft married hcs so I'm glad I'm getting to do more too!! Sorry it took me a few days, anon, but Christmas was time consuming. But it's here now! So thank you for the request, it made me super giddy. Merry Christmas to you too [ a day too late hueh ] 💕💕💕

AIZAWA SHOUTA: Soft Married HCs.

× he's the type of man that goes with the flow

× as a more laid back, calm man, he'd appreciate more a smaller wedding with the people that he cares most about

× but at the end of the day he doesn't really care how it happens as long as it's with you

× it might come out weird but that's who he is: Aizawa wants to marry you because of you and that's it

× want a big wedding? cool, he can take it

× just do not make Present Mic sing

× lmfao who are we kidding, that man has a whole ass show prepared for you but that's another story;;

× so ✨The Big Day✨ comes

× doesn't lose his nerves or anything, he's very chill about it since you're both in your separate rooms to prepare yourselves and stuff

× but once he sees you? babe, he's soft

× i totally mean it

× we simp for this man because we know how soft he truly is, yet I feel you don't get how fucking soft he is for you

× his heart melts, his dark eyes are just on you as you approach him, mesmerized, absolutely in love and it shows

× he has this soft smile on his face that's just so perfect and peaceful...

× gently takes your hand to guide you towards him faster

× and i feel that if you reached marriage point with this man, even this small gesture is so natural for both of you, the intimacy of it repeated so many times that it's only natural for you to reach and grab it without hesitation, you get me?

× [ and that's how he realized he'd ask you to take the next step in your relationship, when it dawned on him that you complete each other; the comfort, the love, the intimacy, the harmony you shared... becho ass he asked you while cuddling in bed or something, in the middle of a snuggling session, voice low, hums shared, iddle conversation going on and he just... does ]

× a tease in his vows, but lowkey

× he knows when to step up his game and knows how serious this is, so he'll make you fall for him all over again in just a few sentences; then proceeds to end it with teasing and a half smirk

× Eri is the ring bearer, fight me on this

× it's a known fact he basically adopted her at this point so it's a package deal but for real, who wouldn't love Eri? like get out

× he knew this already but nothing changes after the wedding

× that's not bad, that's perfect for him

× the difference is the wedding ring he has on his finger that he always plays with whenever he's about to fall asleep, or stares at when he's trying to overcome a hard day

× it's the comfort that it gives him, you know?

× knowing that the love of his life is there for him is what gets him through all of it

× he seeks a routine, a safe spot and life at home is that for both of you

× a place to relax and seek each other's company

× he's a silent man, so being in the same room and each doing your own thing is still quality time for Aizawa, as long as you're there

× even sleeping together

× this man will definitely 100% no doubt use you as a human pillow

× his head? on your chest

× hey, quick tip: play with his hair, pretty please?

× overgrown grumpy cat man definitely loves that

× imagine this: rare free day for both of you, the sound of food sizzling in a pan in the kitchen as you play with Eri in the living room, not knowing a black pair of eyes watches you both fondly from the door

× full apron and messy bun on his head and gentle smile on his features

× everything falls in place for him from time to time

× or more likely, through his chaotic life, coming home to you and being able to observe these types of sceneries just fills his chest with warmth and makes him realize that yeah, this is what he wanted and needed all along

× if you want a pet you're definitely getting a cat

× but only after a lot of begging

× a lot

× he knows he's busy so he might not be able to take care of it all the time, so you better accept some responsibility

× will talk to the cat like it's a grown ass human being, full conversations complaining about everything

× "you get me, right?"

× meow

× "hmm"

× inside jokes and teasing

× all while having this sweet sparkle in his eyes, adoring this bond only you two share

× Aizawa loves silently yet he doesn't hesitate to tell you

× although he mostly saves those words for whenever you're both about to fall asleep, almost dozed off just to get a sleepy, comfortable "I love you too" back because those are his favorites

× will verbally destroy anyone that dares to even attempt to talk shit about you [ ik it's random but i had to drop it somewhere ]

× bc he is protective

× looks laid back and definitely has no problem with you dealing with your own stuff since he knows you are capable of handling it

× but he will cut a bitch, just sayin

× only his close friends know about you; he doesn't see the need to talk about you or mention he's married unless let's say someone is overstepping

× you know that one couple that always bicker like old married people? that's you guys

× throwing shade at each other while you fight a grin

× complaining about each other jokingly

× all that adorable squabble gives him life

× so yeah, Aizawa has his own way of loving you

× but there won't be a day that passes without letting you know in his subtle way that he is thinking about you or about how much he loves and appreciates you

× he's so thankful to have you in his life

#aizawa shouta #aizawa shouta x reader #soft married aizawa #aizawa headcanons #married aizawa #bnha headcanons #bnha #mha #noirewrites

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hskrealm · 4 years ago

Text

innocence (m.)

pairing: drag racer yoongi x reader

genre: fluff, smutsmutsmut. (this post took a turn i swear)

word count: 3.2k

warnings: overstimulation, PET NAMES SO MANY PET NAMES WHAT WAS I THINKING, fingering, oral (f receiving), cute shit, virgin!reader, yoongi is a bit persuasive, etc.

summary: your best friend wants to take your innocence in every possible way.

a/n: i wrote this MONTHS ago, and i literally forgot about it up until yesterday, or sometime before that? i was sad because I deleted it, but my bby @bitchyaus reblogged it after i posted it, and i have NEEEEVEEER been happier.

You hummed as you sat on your couch while scrolling through your social media feed and taking small bites of your favorite snack every now and then.

It was only 7:09. You’d usually find something to occupy yourself every day until 8:00 on the dot (although he’d come early sometimes, but that wasn’t often), which was when Yoongi would come knocking on your door with a new story to tell and to raid your fridge of whatever he could find.

If necessary, you’d tend to the few bruises his beautiful face would sport.

Once he was comfortable enough to tell you what his occupation was, you cringed the moment you imagined him sitting behind the wheel of a vehicle, pushing 200 to nearly 300 miles on a daily basis.

You begged him to consider something safer, to which he responded with a small smirk,

“I’ve been doing this years before I even met you. If I’ve managed to keep myself in good condition for this long, then I’m sure that you have nothing to worry about.”

This had become a repetitive cycle in the short year that you had known him. He’d shoot you a text before he went out for the day, and come speeding back to your place once he was let off of work.

Or–when he let himself off, rather. He never really was the type to follow rules anyway.

You smiled fondly at the thought of seeing his gummy smile sometime in the next hour.

You checked your phone again.

7:14.

Well, 46 minutes to be exact.

You sighed and tossed your head back against the couch cushions as you tried to register what about this man had you so whipped for him.

Could be the fact that he was a sweetheart when it came to you,

Or it could also be the fact that he looked so fucking hot driving those cars despite how much you hated seeing him behind the wheel.

Or, it could be that he had really, really pretty hands–

There was a loud knock at your door. It carried the same loudness that Yoongi’s carried.

Okay, you have really got to find yourself a hobby.

The person knocked twice, and then there was a three second pause before the last and final knock came.

You grinned as you rushed over toward the door.

There was his signature knock that he had given himself sometime a few weeks ago.

He suggested that he should have a special knock so you knew it was him, although you told him multiple times that no one other than him or your best friend came to visit.

He still wouldn’t let up even then, muttering something about how it would be the safest measure. You then (jokingly) proceeded to tell him he knew nothing about safety, which led him to tell you about all of the safety precautions people in his profession must take before even considering driving one of those high speed cars.

He couldn’t take a joke, but that was alright. You loved him anyway.

You took a quick glance through the peephole just to make sure it was him before you unlocked the door.

As usual, he rushed in and threw his bag to the ground before making a beeline to your kitchen.

“Nice to see you too.” You smiled a bit, closing the door back and locking it behind yourself.

“I shouldn’t have to greet you anymore when I enter.” He spoke, although his voice was a bit muffled since he was bent over as he shuffled through your fridge.

“It’d be nice, though.” You sighed dramatically as you walked back over to your couch and flopped onto it.

“Sure.” He shrugged, returning from the kitchen to take his spot next to you on the couch as he always did.

“Hello, Princess.” He smirked, laughing at the way you rolled your eyes and looked away from him.

He’d called you that for forever now, and you’d be a terrible fucking liar if you were to say that it didn’t make your pussy clench.

He knew that it did, too, which was why he said it.

“Did you do something productive today?” He asked, as he took a bite out of one of the strawberries out of the bowl that he quickly prepared for himself.

“I did some school work earlier.” You shrugged, gesturing toward your closed laptop that sat on the arm of the couch closest to you.

He hummed, nodding approvingly.

“Good girl,” He noticed the way that your body shivered at his praise. He always talked like this, but for some reason it was really having an impact on you right now.

“Have you eaten something filling today?” You bit your lip.

You hadn’t had a ‘meal’, but you had some pretty filling snacks. You just weren’t in the mood to cook anything, or even order something.

There was no point in lying to him either, because he could see right through you.

“Depends on what the word filling means.” You responded, as if this wasn’t a question that he asked you everyday.

Yoongi narrowed his eyes at you and set the bowl of strawberries down on your coffee table before quickly reaching over your thighs to grab the bag of chips that you had been snacking on before his arrival.

His hand brushed over the exposed skin of your legs, causing you to gulp. He was always a forward person, but never this forward.

“This isn’t a meal, ____ . “ He scolded, and you rolled your eyes.

“I know, but I can promise you that I am satiated.” Yoongi shook his head in disbelief.

“You hungry?” He asked, cocking his head to the side as he stared into your eyes with his arms crossed.

“Nope.” As if on cue, your stomach growled.

“Mhm.” He mocked, handing you the bowl of strawberries before standing up.

“What are you doing?” You asked, confused as to why he was suddenly up on his feet.

“I’m about to cook you something, little girl.” He rolled his eyes as he walked into the kitchen.

“Yoongiiii-“

“In the mood for pasta? You’ve got all of the ingredients I’d need to make you some alfredo.” You groaned.

“My stomach growls all the time! I’m not hungry, I swear.” He was already pulling out pots and pans from your cupboards as your voice went through one ear and out of the other.

“Suck on those strawberries with those pretty lips of yours while I cook this, hm?” He said, leaning against the kitchen counter with his elbows resting against it.

“I don’t want the straw–”

“I already put the noodles in the pot, so you’re shit out of luck.”

———

Yoongi had been in the kitchen for half an hour while you caught up on your favorite Netflix series.

You should’ve just lied and said yes. He was going through way too much trouble for you.

“Alright,” He began, as he finally left the kitchen.

“Should be good to eat in a few minutes.” He slid back onto the couch.

“Mind if I use your laptop to check my stats? I’m sure they’ve gone up.�� He bragged. You playfully rolled your eyes and handed him your laptop, before directing your attention back to your TV.

Yoongi began typing away for a few minutes, until his fingers paused, his eyes grew wide, and he choked on air.

“What? Those stats not what you expected them to be?” You laughed, Yoongi turning his head to look at you before clicking on a tab at the top of the screen and pushing the laptop in your direction.

“What– Oh my God, give me that!” You yelled, Yoongi easily fighting off your efforts to grab the laptop away from him by shoving his arm against your chest.

“Are these your nudes?” He asked, although it was painfully clear that they were.

Yoongi smirked at the way you began to blush profusely.

Holy shit, you were going to die of embarrassment.

‘Play it cool.’ You thought to yourself.

“Yeah? So what if they are?” You used this opportunity to snatch the laptop away from him and close the tab, before shutting the laptop off and setting it on the coffee table where the empty strawberry bowl was.

Yoongi raised an eyebrow, taken aback by your response.

“Clearly you don’t seem to mind.” You smirked, gesturing to the bulge forming in his pants.

He dropped the smirk on his face as he inched closer to you. You reflexively backed away from him.

“You talk pretty big for a virgin, sweetheart.” He growled. Your stomach fell to the bottom of your ass at his words.

You weren’t sure of what to say.

“Uh, I never told—“

“You’d be surprised of what you tell me when you’re drunk.” He reached forward to twirl a strand of your hair around his pointer finger before tucking it behind your ear, as if he had done this to you before.

“Since we’re letting secrets go, you should know that I’ve thought about fucking you plenty of times.” He hummed, as he traced your jawline with his fingers.

“You haven’t got any idea of what thinking about stripping you of your innocence does to me, sweetheart.”

Your chest began to rise and fall rapidly.

“I know that you’d let me, too.” He slowly pushed you backward until your back hit the couch.

“You would let me, wouldn’t you?” He looked into your eyes, waiting for your approval before he took anything further.

You thought about it.

Did you really want to lose your virginity to this sexy drag racer that you’ve grown to become best friends with over the past year?

Hell yes.

“Yes, yes I’d let you.” You stuttered, causing him to groan at your admittance.

He was going to corrupt you more and more day by day before you even realized it.

And fuck, he couldn’t wait.

“Hmm.” He hummed against your skin, as he nudged your head to the side so he could expose the skin of your neck.

He quickly began to suck love bites against the skin, eager to cut straight to the chase in order to get a taste of that perfect cunt that was spread wide in that picture.

“How far have you gone, baby?” He asked, as he tugged your shirt up over your chest and kissed his way around your breasts.

“I–I’ve, fuck,” You moaned, as he sucked one of your nipples into his mouth.

“I’m sorry, you’ve done what?” He mumbled against your hardening bud. You whimpered.

“I-I’ve masturbated with a toy.” Yoongi detached his mouth from your nipple.

“That’s all?” You nodded shyly.

“Fuck, you’re going to be the death of me.” He hungrily kissed down the rest of your body, stopping right above the band of your shorts.

“I’ve got to taste you to get you prepared to take me. Is that alright?” He wasn’t lying. It would help you adjust to his size a bit easier, but it was mostly for his own personal pleasure.

You nodded, and he wasted no time in tugging down your shorts and panties in one swift motion.

“Oh my God.” He nearly whimpered at the sight of your untouched pussy. You began to close your legs as he stared down at your most intimate areas, which prompted him to roughly throw one of your legs over the back of the couch so you were forced to keep yourself spread for him.

“Don’t ever do that again.” He warned. You nodded, murmuring an apology as he laid himself flat against the couch and pulled your hips closer to his face.

He breathed shakily against your core. You began to writhe in his hold as his cool breath hit your exposed pussy lips.

“Are you sure about this, baby? We could stop this at any moment.” He asked for the final time. It made you smile that he continued to ask you if this was really what you wanted.

“I’m sure. Please–oh, shit!” You yelped. Yoongi hadn’t even let you finish your sentence before he had his lips wrapped around your clit.

Your hands hesitantly tangled in his hair, as you were uncertain if he was okay with you touching him or not.

He sensed your hesitation and moaned in approval as you testingly tugged at his blonde locks.

His moan vibrated against your core, causing you to buck your hips up toward his face.

He grunted at this, using one of his arms to pin you down to the couch by your stomach, while his other arm pushed your flailing leg away from his face so he had more access to his meal.

“So good, baby. So fucking good,” He growled into you, his cock growing harder underneath him as more of your juices began to gush onto his face.

You didn’t know how it was possible, but he managed to pull you even closer to him as he licked a long stripe from your dripping hole back up to your clit, before he dipped his tongue inside of your clenching cunt and (quite literally) fucked you with his tongue.

You were a mess above him, your hair matted and stuck to your sweaty forehead as you relished in the feeling of his tongue collecting every drop of your arousal.

“‘M gonna cum, so fucking close, please please–” You begged him with your eyes closed. He took a glance up at you, wanting to watch you come undone on his tongue.

“SHIT!” You screamed, the euphoric bliss of your first orgasm knocking the wind out of you.

Yoongi hummed and pulled his tongue out of you, slipping two of his fingers into his mouth before lining them up with your cunt.

“You with me, babygirl?” He asked. You opened your eyes so you could see him, but you immediately closed them again ad he slid his digits into your wet hole.

“Ughh, oh my fucking God!” You let out a broken moan, tears welling in your eyes from the overstimulation.

“Hey, you’re okay, hm? I need to make sure you’re as comfortable as possible if you’re still willing to take my cock.” His words were caring, although there was a bit of cockiness behind them, almost as if he knew that you still would be in at least some pain from the stretch.

The thought alone excited him.

“Just a little bit more, okay? Hold out for me.” You were about to protest, when he pressed his hand against your lower stomach and began to piston his fingers in and out of you like a machine.

He curled them perfectly against that little spot inside of you that had your eyes rolling toward the back of your head, and your toes curling in pleasure.

Your mouth fell open in a silent scream as you came for the second time within a five minute span.

Yoongi left you to yourself for a moment as he hastily tugged his jeans down, not wanting to waste time to pull them off completely.

He was so eager to have your little cunt pulsing around him.

He fished around in his back pocket for a condom. He was thanking himself mentally for forgetting to take it out the last time he wore those jeans a few weeks ago.

“Could you be a doll and roll this on for me, baby?” He tore the wrapper open with his teeth and quickly tossed it aside as he handed you the slippery thing.

You took it with shaky hands, still not completely over your last two orgasms as you gently grabbed his cock and spread the condom over it.

“Oh, fuck.” He growled, the feeling of your little hand spreading over his throbbing dick enough to make him cum right there.

He desperately needed to be inside of you.

He grabbed his cock and began to rub circles around your clit, the small action making you gasp for air because of how sensitive you already were.

“Think you can still handle me?” You looked up at him. He wasn’t smirking, but you could hear the smirk in his voice.

“Mhm, j-just please, be gentle.” You whimpered, and Yoongi nodded as he lined himself up with your entrance.

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

For now.

He pushed just the tip into you, instantly catching your lips with his to prevent any sound of discomfort from leaving your mouth.

“Ready for some more?” He asked sweetly, as he pressed his forehead against yours. You winced, but nodded anyway.

He pushed the rest of his cock into you inch by inch, attempting to nullify the pain a bit by leaving kisses along the side of your neck and jaw.

“You’re taking me so well, ____.” He sat still for a moment, letting you adjust before he rocked his hips slightly.

He looked at you for approval, and when you nodded once he began to set a slow, steady rhythm with the pace of his thrusts.

“‘M not gonna last long, baby. You’re squeezing me so tight, I can barely fit my cock through.” You weren’t sure what it was about the way that he was talking to you, but it just made you clench around him even harder as he began to pick up speed.

“I need you to cum with me, Princess. Can you do that for me?” You nodded eagerly, already on the brink of insanity.

He licked his thumb and brought it down to your clit. You squeaked, and he grunted above you as he tried to ease himself inside of you without hurting you.

“Now, cum now.” He ordered, his arms shaking as he held himself up above you to prevent from collapsing on top of your chest.

You came with your mouth held open in a silent moan, your legs spasming around Yoongi’s waist as he slowly pulled out of you.

The corruption was only beginning.

“Hungry? I’m sure the food is plenty cool now.” You laughed breathlessly at his lame joke, as you covered your face with your hands while trying to catch your breath.

“I’ll go grab some for you, but I’ve got a question for you first.” He paused. “No, wait, two actually.” You glanced at him.

“Go for it.” You said, voice hoarse.

“Would you let me take you out sometime? I mean, on a real date?” You scoffed.

“I thought you were going to ask me to be your girlfriend or something.” You laughed. He scratched the back of his neck sheepishly.

“I was.” You froze.

“I backed out, though.”

“I mean, I would’ve said yes.” He snapped his head toward you.

“You would have?” You nodded, a small smile on your face.

“In that case, will you be my girlfriend, then?” You giggled at his shy demeanor, a complete 180 from how he handled you just a few minutes ago.

“Yes, I will.” He leaned down to peck your cheek.

“My last question...”

“Yeeeees?” You encouraged him to continue.

“Why are your nudes on your laptop anyway?”

“I hate you.”

tag list! let me know if you want to be on it. (you could send me a message, an ask, or just comment under this fic)

@bitchyaus @dontaskshhhhh @taesluttt @1-in-abillion @designjet @peachy-bhun @patpus @koracynthia120 @safi4x @lcnycto @someonewhowannadielol @dreamingsmile @rinastylesworld @fan-ati--c @sincemalik @bts-bay-bee @cestlaviecia @jeonjungkookiiee @bunny-kix03

#blkjmn #bts smut #yoongi smut #yoongi fluff #yoongi x reader #yoongi imagine #yoongi au #min yoongi smut #min yoongi fluff #min yoongi x reader #min yoongi imagine #min yoongi au

1K notes · View notes

wannabemobwife · 4 years ago

Text

Guns, Glamour and Goodfellas - Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Leave a Light On

Dad!Mob!Tom x Mom!Mob!Reader

-Pairings: Tom Holland x Reader, Rosie Holland x Henry Osterfield, Family!Rosie Holland x Family!Harry Holland (idk really how to do pairings because most characters have interactions with everyone)

-Warnings: Hospital scenes, sadness, blood, typos

-Words: 4.1K

-Key:

Y/M/N = your middle name

Y/L/N = your last name

Y/B/T = your blood type (if you don’t know you can pick a random one, there is O-/+, AB-/+, A+/-, and B-/+)

A/n: I have a too much fun writing the hospital scenes sorry. And before you at me for a second coma, it isn’t one. Some people just take longer to come out of general anesthesia.

Chapter 11: Leave a Light On

Words: 4K

“Oh my god, she still has a pulse” said one of EMTs in the copter.

“Tell the hospital to have as much Y/B/T on hand when we get there.”

“We got you, Mrs. Holland.”

Everything was a blur. You were taunted by your consciousness ebbing like the tide. One minute you were awake, the other not so much. Noises and smells seemed louder and stronger as your sight was stripped from you. A constant buzzing gave the hint of a helicopter, you were rescued. You wanted to give up at that moment. All your energy had dissipated over the hours of waiting. Giving up would make all the pain go away.

But at what cost? You wanted to see Parker’s and Rosie’s smiling face once more. You wanted to see Tom again. Tell him you loved him because you aren’t so sure he truly believed you the last time. You wanted all these things but it seemed you were meant for a different path.

One without pain, struggle and hurt. One that has only known of peace, bliss, and tranquility. One you ready to say goodbye to and the other hello.

Something beyond yourself was keeping in the position you were in. Struggling to bring oxygen to your lungs, bleeding out liter after liter from your side you were ready and needed to give up. Someone else wasn’t ready.

“Mrs. Holland can you hear me?” A doctor said, shining a light in your eyes to see if you were responsive.

“Mrs. Holland, we are going to take good care of you.”

“Oh, wow... she’s soaked entirely through her bandage. I need all the bags from the blood bank of Y/B/T you can find. She could die of exsanguination any moment.

“Tom,” you whispered.

“What was that? Did you hear that?” Asked the hospital staff, working above you. You reached up weakly, to pull your oxygen mask off for a second.

“Tell Tom I love him, please,” was all you could choke out before a terrifying but familiar sound filled the room. A monotone beep. You were coding.

“I need a crash cart in here. Charging to 200… clear,” called out the doctor. Your body jolted up with the force of 200 joules.

“Charging to 300… clear.”

“Charge to 400, CLEAR,” the doctor screamed.

“Charge to 450—.“

“Doctor we aren’t supposed to give that high of a shock,” informed one of the surgical interns.

“I don’t care, this woman needs to see her kids again… Clear,” The doctor said, delivering a final defibrillation. Your heart rate returned to normal, a steady pulse still weak but there.

“Doctor, she has a pneumothorax (collapsed lung) on her right lung,” said one of the medical personnel using the ultrasound. “Shit, we need to get her to the OR now. Let’s move. I’m not going to let her die on me.” The doctor explained.

A plane ride that was only supposed to be 2 hours and 15 minutes melded into what felt like days. No word from Harry or anyone had come about you and Tom. They all landed and took a car to the hospital. It was enough waiting by then, all they knew is that both of you were found. Neglecting to mention dead or alive.

“I’m here for Tom and Y/N Holland. They were airlifted in. Can we see them?” Nikki asked the person at the front desk.

“No hablo ingles, lo siento,” said the receptionist

“IS THERE ANYBODY HERE WHO SPEAKS ENGLISH?” Dom screamed. “Yes, I do. Did I hear you say you are here for Tom and Y/N Holland?” Asked a man clad in a white lab coat.

“Yes. He’s my son and she’s my daughter-in-law. These are their kids.” Nikki explained gesturing to Parker and Rosie.

“Well ma’am if you’ll follow me. I can tell you in private.” “No, whatever needs to be said, they can hear. They want to hear.” “Still follow me to a private waiting room please, your son is in there. Everyone can come,” the doctor concluded. “Alright then,” Nikki responded, following the doctor to a private waiting room.

“Harry.” Rosie said, seeing her favorite uncle.

“You made it, I’ve been waiting for you guys to hear an update.” Harry was so happy to see the rest of his family. “It’s bad, it was really bad,” Harry explained somberly. “Enough with the dilly dally, just tell me. Is my son dead?” Nikki couldn’t take the waiting anymore.

“They were both brought in barely conscious. Tom had lost some blood due to an open wound on his femur, he has a severe concussion, a few cracked ribs and a small knick on his kidney. He is currently in surgery, they are fixing his kidney. The most he will have is a few stitches but, we are very confident he’ll pull through,” explained the doctor.

“And my mom?” Rosie asked.

“Y/N is currently in surgery, she has protruding wound to the abdomen, a collapsed lung, broken ribs, and a severe concussion. She lost a lot of blood, almost dying of exsanguination. She is in surgery to treat her abdominal wound and her lung. Our biggest concern is sepsis, we are worried an infection caused by the elements will occur.”

“So she’ll be okay, right?” Parker questioned.

“She wasn’t conscious like Tom when they found her. In her case the amount of blood she lost might have stopped bringing oxygen to her brain. If she survives the surgery—“

“If?” Rosie gasped, starting to cry.

“Rosie, let him finish,” Parker snapped.

“If she survives, we don’t know when or if she will wake up. We can only hope for the best. I promise to come back with any further updates.”

“Thank you doctor,” said Nikki.

“I need some tea or coffee or a drink. Anyone else?” Sam said, Dom nodded in response.

“I’ll join you and dad,” Paddy said following Dom and Sam out of the room.

Parker was trying to keep everything inside. He actually appreciated the uncertainty of it all, the longer it went on the longer he didn’t have to hear a definitive answer, that you and Tom were dead.

Parker mainly tried to comfort Rosie but that position was filled once Haz and Henry got to the hospital. It was only 30 mins til another doctor approached them.

“Your son is out of surgery. He is resting in room 302, we are just waiting for him to come out of general anesthesia,” came in another doctor with news.

“Thank you. And my daughter-in-law?”

“She is still in surgery,” informed the doctor.

“Ok, thank you. I’m going to go check on Tom. Parker come with?” Nikki asked, she didn’t want to be alone seeing Tom lie in a hospital bed.

“Sure,” Parker said, following Nikki through the door.

“Harry, you’ll stay here with Rosie,” Nikki called out.

“How you doing, Roo?” Harry asked, moving towards Rosie’s side.

“My mom calls me that,” she said, unmoving towards Harry’s love.

Rosie was still like a statue. But her mind was very active, traveling from place to place. Just waiting for someone to update her on your condition.

“I know. She’ll pull through, Rosie.”

“How can you be so certain?”

“Cause I know your mom. For as long as I can remember she has always been the strongest person in the room.” Harry comforted her, draping an arm over her shoulders. “Your dad is convinced she is indestructible. Sure, she has gotten hurt in the past but she has always bounced back. Hasn’t she?” Harry encouraged.

“Yeah, she has,” Rosie sniffled, wiping her nose with her sweater’s sleeve.

“After everything she has survived, she is still here,” Harry asserted. “When she and your dad first were dating, they’d like to scare each other. Tom must’ve pulled something like 20 guns on her. It was really funny to watch,” Harry grinned.

“Tell me more stories please,” Rosie perked up at the anecdotes.

“Well there was that time when your mom told your dad about being pregnant with both you and Parker.”

“I already know that one.”

“Ok, let me think… oh. One time we pulled a prank on her. All of us, me, your dad, Sam, Paddy and Haz. She was supposed to speak at this benefit promoting something… I want to say a disease… maybe climate change… who cares,” Harry began. “But she is better at it now but she used to be so scared of public speaking. That night at the gala, she had a panic attack and Tom went to comfort her backstage, while the boys and I all went into her purse and switched out her speech for the joke one we made.”

“She went on stage and broke in to a laughing fit. All her nerves dissipated as she stood up there, cracking jokes from left and right. It was really funny because she was so scared she would read whatever was written on the cards. She did end up making a fool out of herself, but it was funny nonetheless. She was so mad at us, she avoided Tom for a week,” Harry finished, reminiscing of that night.

“Wow, that’s mean. Like really mean,” Rosie remarked as his story came to an end.

“No it wasn’t. It was funny, she’ll laugh about it now if you ask her.”

“Was she as mad as she has been lately?” Rosie inquired.

“What do you mean?”

“Mom and dad have been fighting a lot… I’m scared they won’t be able to work it out. I’ve never seem them like this,” Rosie cried, fighting back a fit of sobs.

“Roo, those two? Are you kidding me? They will work it out, they always have.”

“But that isn’t a guarantee.”

“Rosie, your mom and dad have been written in the stars since the beginning. Nothing will ever break them apart. And almost dying really brings people back together. I wouldn’t worry Rosie, they’ll be ok,” Harry consoled her.

Rosie really needed to hear that. Something to get her mind off all the death and sickness that surrounded her. She wasn’t ready to say goodbye. She needed you to hold her once more.

“Mrs. Holland, Y/N is out of surgery now. If you’ll follow me I can take you to her room,” a doctor said to Nikki as she was stroking Tom’s hair, waiting for him to wake up.

“Oh thank god, thank you. Parker do you want to come?” Nikki asked.

“No, I think I’ll stay here with dad. In case he wakes up. I’m not ready to see her like that anyway,” Parker mumbled, needing every excuse to not walk into your room.

Nikki just nodded in response. Nikki was there when Rosie was in her coma and she knew you liked to talk to her as if she was there, so she did the same.

“Hey, Y/N. I’m sorry this happened. The doctors have warned me that you might not wake up and I’m here to tell you that’s not an option. Your kids need you. Tom needs you…. He won’t be able to live without you. None of us will,” Nikki said, holding you hand. As soon as Rosie got word, she was already there. Standing in your doorway peering at your sunken body.

“Mom? It’s Rosie…. It’s your Roo,… why isn’t she waking up?” Rosie came barging in. She’d never seen you in a state like this.

“Mom? Mommy, please,” Rosie said, starting to shake you a bit.

“Rosie, come here,” Nikki said, pulling her into her arms. “She’ll be ok. All we have to do is wait.” Nikki concluded.

In Tom’s room, Parker was still there by his dad’s side. Everything had gotten massively screwed up. He was betraying his own dad and Tom didn’t even know.

“Parker?” Tom croaked out, slightly moving.

“Dad, I’m so glad you are okay,” Parker lunged to hug him.

“Me too, buddy,” Tom said, gritting his teeth to mask the pain.

“How’s mom?” Tom asked, praying you were still alive. It had been a rough night. Images of your half-dead body leaning against him for support plagued his memory.

“Umm… you should see for yourself.”

“What room is she in?” Tom asked, jumping out of bed.

“Dad, I don’t think it’s such a good idea you get up,” Parker exclaimed.

“Parker, don’t you dare stand in my way.”

“Mr. Holland, you’re awake — woah, you can’t get up. Your stitches could rip,” the nurse spoke with a thick Spanish accent.

“I don’t care. Let me see my wife,” Tom yelled.

“You may need to sedate him,” Parker said cheekily.

“Fuck that,” Tom cursed.

“You aren’t doing anything to me till I see her,” Tom asserted, the nurse just nodded in response and brought him a wheel chair.

Parker wheeled him through the hospital. He was about to face his fear as well as Tom. It both being the fact that you were dead and not longer living. They weren’t ready for that.

Tom came into your room and it was like a time machine. All those times he was walked into a room similar to this one with the white walls, white sheets, bright blinding lights and the machines that beep to no end. He was taken back to every time he had seen you lying in a hospital bed.

All the times he knew he hadn’t protected you. All the guilt and anguish came flooding back. Washing over him like a tsunami.

He walked in to see everyone gathered around you. Rosie was sitting on the left side of your bed, clutching your left hand and Henry was next to her keeping an arm around her shoulder. Tom didn’t care about them anymore, all that mattered was you.

“Dad, you’re awake!” Rosie cheered, as she saw Tom in the doorway.

“Yeah baby, I’m okay,” he said, holding Rosie close to his chest.

“I’m scared, dad. I’m scared she won’t wake up,” Rosie cried.

“I know. I am too.” Tom responded, his eyes still fixed to your lifeless figure.

“You know it was just a 5 weeks ago, you were lying a hospital bed just like mom. And she was holding on to your hand just like you are to her. And if you woke up from that, I can promise you she’ll wake up from this,” Tom encouraged.

“You really think so?” Rosie queried.

“I know so.… You know what your mom loves to tell me?”

“No. What?”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

“It sounds like her,” Rosie chucked to herself.

“Yeah, it does.” Tom did the same, he was the one keeping you here. He wasn’t ready to say goodbye. 17 years was nothing compared to lifetime he was destined to have with you. Nobody accounts for the times where something so drastic happens that it can change your entire timeline.

Nobody believes they will die tomorrow or get hit by a bus anywhere. People just live in day to day life thinking that they have a 100 years to go.

You’d think by now, he’d gotten used to seeing you in a hospital bed. Maybe grown accustomed to it. On the contrary, every time he’d see you like this he’d go weak at the knees and beg to switch places with you. To be the one lying there, on death’s door, not you

Every time he has made a promise, your life has been put on the line. You are constantly caught in the crossfires. Tom slowly remembered why he hated hospitals so much, especially when they were associated with you.

“We’ll give you two a minute,” Nikki said, motioning for everyone to clear the room so it was just Tom and you.

“Hey, darling. I told you we’d make it. We had two choices either we died together or we made it together.” Tom began, trying not to cry.

“Y/N, I’m standing here and I’m okay. So it’s only a matter of time before I see you again. We promised it would be us together. Don’t you dare go back on that promise from ages ago, I’m supposed to go before you. Ok? It’s supposed to me. You promised me.”

“This one that you have to keep. I know it might be nearly impossible to, love. But there is no but or if, there is only you waking up and seeing me. Seeing your husband who loves you more than life itself. Seeing our two beautiful kids. I know I haven’t been your favorite person lately, so don’t do it for me. Do it for them, Parker and Rosie. They need you, more than they know.”

“Alright princess, it's only a matter of time. I’ll see you soon.” Tom finished, pressing a kiss to your forehead. One of longing, he just wanted to see your smiling face again. He let himself go completely, breaking down the flood gates. Tears started coming and they didn’t stop, they couldn’t.

Haz peered through the open door, to see Tom crying over you, he immediately jumped into best mate mode and went to comfort Tom.

“Hey. It’s ok. You can let it out,” Harrison said, pulling Tom into his arms.

“I was so awful to her Haz. I let her think I cheated on her so she wouldn’t be mad about Rosie and Henry,” Tom cried out.

“Why? What did you do? You know what, that’s not important right now. The point is she will pull through.”

“She could be dying and the last moment I can only remember with her is our fight. I didn’t even get to say goodbye.”

“She’s not dying, Tom. Y/N has survived much more than this and promise you, you will say hello again.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” Tom said, taking a line from your vernacular.

“Come on, let’s get some coffee… Here, hop on. I’ll push you,” Haz said, grabbing Tom’s wheelchair

“For fucks sake, you aren’t pushing me. I’m not some sick, crippled patient.” Tom exclaimed.

“Well… you did just get out of surgery.”

“I don’t care. I’m not going to let my helicopter crashing be the reason I can’t walk and I am looked at with pity.”

“Alright Tom, I believe we were going to get some coffee.”

“I don’t want to leave her alone,” Tom whispered.

“Rosie will be in here in a moment,” Haz explained.

“Ok.. Roo, can you go sit with your mom while I get your dad some coffee?” Haz asked. Tom still didn’t want to leave you but he knew you would want him to eat something.

“Yes, I’ll keep her safe.”

“I know you will, baby… Hold it. Hey Henry, can I talk to you?” Tom said, holding Henry back from entering the room.

“Dad,” Rosie said, sternly.

“Don’t worry, sweetie,” Tom said pulling Henry to the side.

“I’m sorry Tom.. um I mean Mr. Holland but I love your daughter more than anything,” Henry stammered.

“I just wanted to say thank you for being there for her when.. you know,” Tom admitted.

“Of course, I love her very much. And if the time every comes where I plan on marrying her I will ask for hands in marriage,” Henry promised.

“Woah kid, slow down. This is permission to date. No talking or even thinking about marriage, you understand. Also wear a fucking condom.”

“Yes, sir. Understood… Thanks Tom.”

“You’re a good kid, Henry. She’s in good hands,” Tom grinned, Henry just smiled and returned to Rosie. Returning to his rightful place, in her arms.

“Haz, did you bring me a change of clothes. I need to get out of this fucking gown,” Tom chuckled.

“Are you sure that’s a good ide—“ Haz started but was soon cut off.

“Eh, eh,” Tom interrupted giving him a harsh glare.

“You are not weak, I get it. Yeah, they are in my bag,” Haz concluded.

Tom said, “Thank you,�� in return.

The waiting was back and it was killing Tom once again. This time he wasn’t waiting for both your impending deaths, just yours. It was eating him from the inside out.

You didn’t have enough time together. It wasn’t enough. Tom desired more, he needed more. All your favorite moments of you played through his head. Like he was watching a movie of his life with you, his love story.

One specifically, the day he proposed to you. It was hard to top his happiness that day.

All the days leading up to it he was distant and flighty. It worried it you greatly. Was he planning to break up with you? You were consumed with never-ending negative thoughts about your relationship.

It had been a while since you and Tom had a date night. He’d blown you off a few times to plan out the perfect proposal, afraid he’d let the question just slip out somehow. However, that was unknown to you so all you thought was, he’s an ass.

Tom was in his office, planning out how he was going to do it. What he would wear, where he would propose, what would he say. What would you say? He was nervous wreck.

“Haz, I can’t have anyone come in here ok?” Tom ordered. He must’ve practiced it 7 times. Getting down on one knee and declaring his love for you behind closed doors.

“Understood, Tom,” Haz said, giving him a cheeky grin as he closed his door. Not even 10 mins later, you came barging in through the front door. In a fury because Tom hadn’t returned any of your calls.

“Where is he?” You asked Haz. “Y/N?” He said, confused as to why you were here. Well, you did live there.

“Where’s Tom? I have to talk to him,” you asserted. “Why am I asking you? Of course, he is in his study,” you replied to your own question.

“NO, you can’t go in there,” Haz said, following you to Tom’s office.

“And why not?”

“He’s in a meeting.”

“What meeting would he have a 10:30 at night… Unless?” Your heart sank at the possibility of Tom not alone in there.

“Unless what?”

“He has a woman in there doesn’t he?”

“Umm.”

“It’s fine. I’ll go. You won’t see me around anymore. He chose her over me,” you said, trying not to cry. But you weren’t going to put up a fight.

“Y/N it’s not like that,” Haz called after you, trying to stop you from walking away.

“Then what is it Haz?”

“I can’t tell you?… Just go in there and see for yourself.”

“I don’t want see them.”

“Just do it,” Haz ordered, you eventually agreed. Opening the door to a very well-dressed Tom down on one knee holding a blue velvet box in his hands.

“People always spoke of soulmates and I didn’t believe them. But then I found you. And I had never been so happy to be proven wrong. Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N you make me want to be a better man. You are my inspiration for everything. I can’t ever imagine living without you. Will you marry me?” Tom said, oblivious to you standing right there.

“Yes,” you said without hesitation.

“No! No, no. You weren’t supposed to see that. Haz I told you to guard the door,” Tom yelled.

“Yes, Tommy. I’ll marry you”, you continued, hoping he’d hear you.

“God, it's ruined now. I’m so sorry. I had this huge plan take you to the London eye,” Tom apologized profusely, running his hands through the curls atop his head in frustration.

“Tom, you're not hearing me. I want to be your wife,” you exclaimed, you couldn’t contain your excitement.

“You do?” Tom surprised at your answer.

“Yes, that’s what I’ve been saying. YES!” You screamed. Tom immediately grabbed you twirling you in the air and kissed you with all the love and passion you deserved. He had been neglecting you so he wouldn’t spoil it.

He put the ring on your finger. It looked as though it was home. You were his and he was yours. Nothing could top that moment.

Thinking about you and the time spent together. It made it that much harder to say goodbye.

Tom was brought out of his trance as you stirred, starting to wake. All heads and eyes turned towards you.

“Y/N. Honey, it’s ok. You were in a helicopter crash. You’re ok. You’re ok. I’m so happy to see you,” Tom whispered, tucking the hair out of your face.

The moment you came to, your eyes widened and a look of panic adorned your face. You were completely lost. Unaware of all your surroundings. You managed to croak out three words. Not an “I love you,” not words of love, quite the opposite.

“Who are you?”

A/n: Alright, Y/N lived. As I promised, there are 17 chapter in this series, 6 more to go. I will start writing the sequel series once all these chapters have been posted, even though I have it already planned out in my head lol. New chapters every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

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