#I think after this arc it will be smooth sailing from here

[salmonseagull]

The Sleepless Downpour update

So idek how long it’s been since I posted the last chapter lmao but I swear it’s coming back some time soon (kinda). I think I’ve been the busiest I have ever been in my life because my family is in the process of moving, so I haven’t really had time to write anything, including the sleepless downpour :(

But things are calming down a little bit now and I’ve slowly been writing more of the sleepless downpour (I wrote 300 words last night :D)

I also think it would be best for me to write out this whole arc before I post anything because it’s pretty complicated and I want to make sure I get everything right. This arc will be about 7 chapters long and I’ve written (almost) 2 already

If you were wondering where I went this is it lol

I might give some sneak peeks along the way, so let me know if that’s something you guys would like to see!

[blueteller]

I found this on reddit it's not my opinion but it's kind of funny and disconcerting.

What do you think?

( https://www.reddit.com/r/CharacterRant/s/uwKw63Cgoc )

"A rant on Trash of the Count’s Family

Alright before I begin I would like to preface by saying that I am a long time reader of the novel and love this novel to death. It kept me company during my darkest and lowest points of my life and I am forever grateful for it !

The rant also in no way affects the brilliance of the story. With that out of the way here it goes:

This is an amazing fantasy novel filled with great visuals, writing, story and top-notch characters. However it has TWO big problems that broke the story smooth sailing for me and I need to rant about it because where I am from I am pretty sure no one reads TCF in a 6000 mile radius.

One big problem was the romance. THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NONE OF IT. This is not a problem if the main character doesn’t want romance (he doesn’t nope) but NONE of the main/side characters that has been introduced so far also want nothing to do with romance. It was a little awkward to read the story based in medieval setting where characters are as pure as angels as they come.

Now, you can of course raise the point that romance was never the main focus of this novel (it’s not even a background focus or some D plot) but let’s analyse this novel here for a second okay? This novel is very gore and never ever shy away from very dark themes or stories.

- The main protagonist of the story (sorry forgot his name it’s been a long time) has his entire village with whom he has spent 20 years murdered and burned to ashes, all the men women and children are totally dead.

- The Prince story is also pretty dark and deals with some adult themes about race and identity.

- The dragon raon (is that the name?) backstory is…holy shit some hardcore torture and let’s not forget the revenge torture that happened later with raon eating steak.

- The butler and his butcher son

- The absolute crazy HUMAN EXPERIMENT arc that was happening in the Empire. I mean holy shit they really went into crazy detail about body mutilation and the scientists are absolute psychopaths in how they love their job.

And I am just scratching the surface about how dark this novel is and there’s plenty of it. The point is that it is very adult oriented novel with these stories but on the flip side their romance department is so negligible that even Tom and Jerry had more romance than this.

It actively avoids it like a plague. Why is this an issue? Let me explain.

Simple answer it feels a little jarring or disorienting when you read the novel like going back and forth between watching the looney tunes movie and switching immediately back to a Black Mirror episode.

But I have to give where credit is due. I didn’t notice the romance problem until after some 500+ chapters later (that’s how good the novel story is ) and how did I notice it?

After some battle trying to reclaim the south (north?) tower and this is the part where the Empire’s royalty is on the brink of collapse the redhead girl (I also forgot her name but she is part of the main gang) is extremely tired after a long battle and Cale tries to help her by giving her some healing potions (remember at this point she is the only female character that understands Cale the most and their relationship is the most developed of all) but she says she is so tired she can’t even lift her arms, so Cale (as logic would have it) offers to feed her the potion himself (see completely logical under the circumstances) but Raon the dragon out of nowhere says, “You are too weak Cale! Let me do it”. And I am like…say what? We know the main gang always comments that Cale is weak and all but come on guys we know he isn’t and in fact he’s been through crazy shit. During that battle he never had to fight and was in top condition so that remark from raon made even more less sense.

And then the redhead laughed it off and said “it’s okay I will do it myself” and she does…after a bit of struggle to lift the said bottle.

It’s a small thing but it did break my immersion (it was already broken before, I will explain later). It forced me as a reader to actually “think” about the author intentions something that should never happen when reading a fantasy novel. And it made me go “hmm wait a minute” and then I reflected back on all the 500+ chapters I have read and I came to a realisation that…forget main character romance there is hardly any romance of any proportions from any and every character in this whole novel! It was so impossibly impossible that it teared through the immersion completely.

The second reason for this rant and this is connected to when my immersion showed a small crack. And this reason is purely a preference thing so feel free to ignore this as you want.

I personally believe that when you make a “reborn in a fantasy world” story you absolutely must never collide “our” world with the fantasy world.

Don’t do that.

From page 1 you are setting up this fantasy life, fantasy way of living and thinking, fantasy people, fantasy stories and most importantly a fantasy you. Don’t break this immersion by literally making the world he (Cale) came from an integral part of the story.

When the main protagonist found out who Cale really is and confronted him about it by listing some Korean food items I was a little disappointed because it felt like a parent telling a child that role playing as a prince and over now put the castle made of pillows back in place and do your homework for school tomorrow.

Maybe it’s just a me thing but after that confrontation, every time Cale interacted with anyone be it the redhead, his dragon, butler or anyone it all felt so plastic and fake, like I was overly conscious of the fact that this is a fantasy land filled with fantasy people and well…it made me feel a little lonely."

Wow, this is quite interesting! Thanks for sending me this. Not because I agree – anyone who knows anything about my opinions on TCF would know that the very 2 points that the author of this post has "problems with" are the things that I embrace with great enthusiasm.

So, prepare for a long ride!

First of all, let me make this absolutely clear, the same way this person did at the beginning of their own post; they are allowed to have their own opinion on what they like or dislike. The same way I am allowed to like or dislike certain elements of stories. I don't claim that TCF is a flawless work either – it's just that all the flaws it does have, at least to me, are so minor I don't care about them in the slightest.

I might actually be "brave enough" in the future to actually make my own post about the "flaws" of the story for me, no matter how few. But not today. Today, let's focus on the reddit post.

Now, imagine a person (the author of this post) is given an apple pie in a restaurant.

This person very much enjoys apple pies. They continue to visit the same restaurant and keep ordering this apple pie. But after a while, they discover "two big problems" with the apple pie.

First of all, it does not contain cinnamon. So this person is like – why not! That is, they did not notice before, but it is SO jarring to them now that they know! Because they believe all apple pies should contain cinnamon. Secondly, this apple pie is made out of a species of apples they do not like. In fact, they are convinced this apple species is not fit for apple pies! So, they quit ordering apple pies at this restaurant.

Meanwhile, there's a second regular customer (me) who orders the apple pie at this restaurant. This customer, in fact, is kind of sick of cinnamon. They were so happy they discovered a restaurant that doesn't use it! This person also notices this apple pie has a very interesting texture to it, one they very much enjoy, because of the specific apple species this restaurant uses. It quickly became their all-time favorite dessert.

Obviously, neither customer here is wrong. "The customer is always right in matters of taste" is a saying for a reason (although people usually say only the first half of it, forgetting the second part), and just because I love the "apple pie" in question, I am not going to shame the other person for their own taste.

With all that said, please allow me to address to the post properly, step by step.

First, when addressing the lack of romance as a problem, this is this person's argument: they list major dark moments in the story, like Choi Han's village getting massacred, dark race racism, Raon's torture et cetera. Then they say, "The point is that it is very adult oriented novel with these stories but on the flip side their romance department is so negligible that even Tom and Jerry had more romance than this".

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't believe… Tom and Jerry had any romance either. That cartoon did not even have dialogue. So like, huh??? What kind of argument is that? Should I say that Tom and Jerry has a critical flaw that is has no talking despite being all about comedy? That it would have been better if it was dubbed or something? Well, there was that one movie I remember from childhood but – never mind, we're getting off track here. This argument kind of, completely falls flat for me.

I get the implication. "TCF is has so many dark themes, it should be mature enough to contain romance as well". Which is, completely off the mark for me, personally. Maturity and romance have NOTHING to do with each other.

There's also the statement that "It actively avoids [romance] like a plague." And I agree, kind of. This story avoids romance on purpose. But It never felt unnatural for me. I was kind of expecting it to pop up eventually, back when I first started reading. I thought for SURE Rosalyn would be somebody's love interest – because she had to be, right?? But it gradually dawned on me that there are so many cool, pretty, strong, independent female characters… And none of them are representing a specific fetish or exist solely to be somebody's wifu. The women are PEOPLE, they are fleshed-out, complex characters who have goals and ambitions and just like for the men, there is no thought about romance here because there is so much going on – most of it world-ending, in fact – that focusing in romance would actually DECREASE the maturity of the story instead of enhancing it.

The author of the post said, "It was so impossibly impossible that it teared through the immersion completely". What, do you need characters getting laid to be truly realistic mature adults or something? I think you have the wrong idea about adulthood… Let me say it again, those people are too busy in this story to focus on dating. Even if Cale himself wasn't so obviously ace, his life has been so crazy since he transmigrated, I have no idea HOW on earth he could have found the time (or anyone else for that matter: just look at poor Alberu, swimming in paperwork 24/7!). He can't even sleep for more than 4 hours per day during the war arc. What I personally would find jarring is exactly this: characters trying to freaking date or play off romantic subplots while the world was LITERALLY GETTING DESTROYED. That would have been so petty and ridiculous.

So, the expectation that there HAS to be romance, just because… I think it is a faulty expectation to have in the first place. And it is NOT unnatural that the characters don't do romance (especially with how many species there are among the cast and the age gaps between them, it would have been awkward to say the least; unless you're the type to like Twilight style of romance). The story put a lot of focus to forge familial bonds between the characters. It doesn't lack in the relationship department, just non-platonic one. And if this is a problem for someone and they find it jarring, well… Again, no cinnamon in apple pie, I guess.

Next, we have the argument that "when you read the novel like going back and forth between watching the looney tunes movie and switching immediately back to a Black Mirror episode". I don't know Black Mirror, but I get it. The author of the post claims that the comedic character interactions – the ones that had been very well established in the first 200 chapters of the story, covering full 2 years in the timeline – are… what, unrealistic? Inaccurate? Cartoonish? I’m not 100% sure what the exact issue is here.

They quote a scene where I assume Rosalyn is too tired to lift her arms and Cale offers to help and Raon says he's too weak and let him do it instead. The author of the post then acts confused, as if it was completely unreasonable, because Cale is not weak. Um…. I don't know if they were not paying attention, but that's just false. Cale is PHYSICALLY weak, despite all his Ancient Powers. That is exactly the whole reason why he keeps coughing blood and fainting and stuff. So it was funny, and in-character, and fitting with the rest of the story – at least in my opinion. If that broke this person's immersion, then fine I guess, but I really don't see the reason. I guess they don't enjoy the "texture" of this "apple pie".

Speaking of texture, the last point pf the post I want to address: the belief that you should not mix "real world" and fantasy. They say, "I personally believe that when you make a "reborn in a fantasy world" story you absolutely must never collide "our" world with the fantasy world. Don't do that". Excuse me, but uh… why? That is not the case at all, for many stories? I mean, you could approach it that way, nothing wrong with keeping it separate. But most classic isekai examples usually stray from that idea, actually. Are you familiar with Chronicles of Narnia, by any chance? Did you know that the magical lamppost that Lucy found in the woods actually came from England? It was a very fun bit of backstory from the Magician's Nephew.

"Don't break this immersion by literally making the world he (Cale) came from an integral part of the story." Why not, man??? It was so brilliantly done! In fact, it was so freaking cool, the way TCF did it! What, is "our world" so boring and terrible you must keep it separate from the fantasy at any cost? It was plot relevant, it gave Cale legit ties to the new world, it fleshed out his character, it was incredible! 10/10! If TCF lost that element, it would have been a great loss.

And even if you don't like the mixing of "fantasy and reality" as something "immersion breaking"… there is one problem with this kind of argument, in TCF at least.

Kim Rok Soo is NOT FROM OUR REALITY.

Let me repeat: the man is not from regular, modern Korea! HE IS FROM A FANTASY MONSTER APOCALYPSE DIMENSION!

The whole reveal of what kind of place KRS comes from is what make this story so good to me. It was an incredible twist. The "regular, normal man from modern world" was a red herring meant to hide the fact that he was an ability user from what is basically a superhero world full of monsters! It is not! Regular! Modern! World!!!

"When the main protagonist found out who Cale really is and confronted him about it by listing some Korean food items I was a little disappointed because it felt like a parent telling a child that role playing as a prince and over now put the castle made of pillows back in place and do your homework for school tomorrow." That… you really, REALLY missed the point here, man. That was not the vibe of the scene at all! Choi Han and Cale are both essentially war veterans, mentioning foods from their childhood! This the "Frodo and Sam talking about the flavor of strawberries from Shire at the foot of Mount Doom" from Lord of the Rings type of moment! Only, well, a bit more comedic. Still, it was so touching!! But, well… again, you don't like the taste of the pie, there is nothing I can do about it.

And lastly, there was this paragraph at the end of the post:

"Maybe it's just a me thing but after that confrontation, every time Cale interacted with anyone be it the redhead, his dragon, butler or anyone it all felt so plastic and fake, like I was overly conscious of the fact that this is a fantasy land filled with fantasy people and well… it made me feel a little lonely."

I never noticed such a thing. I do not know if more people felt that way. But I always thought that the characters were well-established and their behavior natural. I am sorry that the immersion break made the author of the post lonely. I hope they can spend time with their friends and feel a little better. Fantasy shouldn't just be a tool to "fill an empty void in your life and escape terrible reality". For me, stories are meant to create something beautiful, to inspire, and to make one consider the possibilities of reality. I mean, if Cale can stop world-ending threats by being brave and making good strategies, why can't I handle the minor problems that reality has to offer? It's all a matter of perspective.

So, that is it. That's my whole response. I hope it satisfies you! Have a great day!

[somethingclevermahogony]

Find the Word Tag Game

@sarandipitywrites tagged me here - thank you! I suggest you check out some of their stuff!

my words were blink, peer, ghost, pulse, and jaw. As of right now I only have two WIPs, books 1 and 2 of The Testaments of the Green Sea (both of which are currently unnamed, oops) and so I will be drawing from there. I think this will end up being just Book 1.

I am tagging @abalonetea, @foragedbonesblog, @theblackbookofarkera, @patternwelded-quill, @the-octic-scribe and whoever else wants to answer, if you want to play! your words will be snort, breeze, soul, crash, and blood.

Blink

... But the real excitement came in the form of a small cone-shaped snail. Snails were a delicacy among the nobility of Labisa, braised in wine and herbs, coated in olive oil or else fried in sheep’s fat, and topped with salty cheese and various herbs. The one survivor who worked in the kitchens inspected the mollusk, and after plenty of shakes of the head, double takes, and stoic nods, he declared that the snail was in fact safe to eat. In the blink of an eye, people were in the water flipping stones and digging through the sand in search of more of the delicate treat while others went about making a fire using the wood washed up on the river bank and the long dry grass that grew just beyond. 

Peer

...“A slave revolt perhaps, or the hungry rising up,” Penetinos said calmly.  “You’re not nervous?” Suru asked. “Not particularly. I have no qualms with them or with what they might do to me.” Suru frowned and opened his mouth to say something. Just then something shot through linen curtains. That something sailed through the air in a wide arc, limbs outstretched.  Gasps and shouts rang out, tables were flung and potted plants upended in the mad dash to get away from whatever it was that lurked just out of side. Suru thought he could hear something growl. For his part, the guard who had just been thrown through the curtain groaned and tried to sit up. A moment later he was joined by a peer who was slid across the smooth marble floor, one broken arm trailed at his side. He would have shrieked with pain if only he were conscious. The curtains were ripped from their hooks high above and tossed to the ground. In their place stood a hulking figure, chest bloodied by the prick of the guards’ spears. A little girl was perched upon the giant's shoulders, arms wrapped around his head. “Narul!” Suru gasped.

Ghost

“What about people?” “People? Well, they’re all around, you’re talking to one right now.” Penetinos chuckled under his breath. “No, I mean spirits. Dead people, ghosts.” This finally broke Penetinos’ concentration and he looked up from his work. His furrowed brow accentuated the lines on his forehead. “There’s no such thing as ghosts. Mortal beings don’t just become spirits. They are entirely different things. Human souls reincarnate anew in another world. Do you not know this? I know you’ve been a slave, Suru, but certainly, you have at least some passing knowledge of spirits and the cycle?” “No no, I do, it's just,” Suru paused “there are ghost stories, and well, people die with unfinished business, maybe sometimes they stay and-” “Do you really think if people could deny death and stay here on Kobani to appease their own concerns they wouldn’t? What unfinished business is so important that the gods and the universe itself should break the rules of life and death just so that normal humans like you and I can see it finished? Hmm?” Penetinos snapped, his normally serene countenance now gone. One quivering finger was pointed at Suru’s chest.  Suru opened and closed his mouth as he searched for words. The sage's golden eyes seemed to burn into his own. “I don’t know-”

Pulse

Zatar smiled and bowed with an exuberance he had not shown since his youth. “I will let you begin.” Kumad marched forward, all the while his eyes remained on the tip of the spear. With each twitch and bob he would shrink back, and each time would earn a chuckle from Zatar. “Go on Macurian, hit me!” Kumad could feel his pulse in his temples, could hear his teeth chatter. He closed his eyes and swung, he waited for the sting of bronze, but was greeted by the most unexpected of sensations, nothing. Zatar had stepped out of the way of his strike and grinned at him, he had not even bothered to lift his spear. Kumad scowled. “You could have killed me, you could have killed me dozen times over.” “Indeed.”

Jaw

 Istek looked up into the soulless black eyes. The two stood in silence. It struck Narul how different they looked, the vibrant and lively sea captain and the sickly and gangly creature.  With a strangled roar Istek swung his fist. The creature made no move to stop him. It fell to the floor, jaw shattered by the force of the blow. It half-heartedly waved its arms in the air in an attempt to fight back as Istek straddled the gaunt chest and rained blows down on that inhuman face. Blood splashed across the smooth floor. By the time Dati dragged Istek off of the creature it's face was broken and crushed. Istek's knuckles were bloody, the skin peeled. Narul made no attempt to stop him, he had felt just the same way.

[nyotasaimiri]

Arc Two (redux) 83

As Nyota and Arjun ventured deeper into the chamber, blue light began to shine above them again. But it wasn’t steady this time. Nyota looked up and saw lights flickering overhead, but her vision was too poor to make out much. She stared harder, tried to focus. It was too close, well below the ceiling…

“Captain, there’s a ledge up that way,” Arjun said, stopping beside her to point it out, “but even your lemur jump couldn’t get it, I’m thinking. And these walls are too smooth for a grapple. Hey, the hell’s that?”

A slow and distant smile glittered in Nyota’s eyes and warmed her lips as she finally put together the pieces of what she saw. “I don’t believe it. Light. It’s hard light. Arjun, we need to get a better look at this.”

It was more than just light. Several platforms flickered on and off, arcing up the side of the room. Between them, thick stone ledges nestled in like books on a well-fit shelf.

“What’s so good about it?” the old man grumbled as he followed her, but she could tell he was more curious than cranky. “It’s just some laser effects.”

“No, watch.” Nyota touched the lowest platform with her spear. The tip stopped, held in place by blue radiance. “It’s not an effect. I don’t know how to explain—the Miniknog has been pursuing this kind of technology since before I was born, but their efforts never managed anything more than a hologram—and the projection of Big Ape that I fought, months back, but that one was experimental at best. My mentor’s wife was one of their lead scientists working on it. He would mention her research from time to time.”

“Your mentor?” Arjun asked. Nyota could hear the raised eyebrow in his voice. “Aly mentioned him. Some bigwig bastard, is that right?”

Nyota went still for a moment, thought slipping right out of her mind, then shook her head. “He raised me. Say what you like beyond that.”

Arjun was quiet for a while as Nyota watched and prodded the platform, testing its limits and learning the pattern for when it appeared or disappeared.

“His wife then, you said she worked on this sort of stuff?”

The sudden question surprised her, but Nyota shook her head again. “I know only what he told me. She died before I met him. A medical complication—apex mothers were not… made to handle twins, you see.” A tiny echo of her mentor’s sadness curved her lips into a faint bittersweet smile. She didn’t look at Arjun; perhaps the sadness hadn’t reached her voice. “He said his eldest looked just like her, and the twins grew up well. They had their mother’s mind, always curious… But that isn’t relevant right now.”

“Right, right.” Arjun looked up at it. “So what is?”

Nyota studied the platform for a moment longer, then grabbed the edge and hauled herself up, offering him a hand as soon as she was steady. “Quickly now, it won’t last too long. There we go.”

She led him onto the sturdy stone shelf just past the hard light’s edge. “Apex never managed to master this technology, but it looks like the ancients did,” she said, “and I think it’s our way forward. There are more platforms along the wall. We can reach the ledge from here.”

Arjun gripped her sleeve as they went and tried very hard not to look down. “Walking on light,” he muttered. “What a damn fool idea.”

*

Lumen sat close to SAIL’s console and wished he could have gone with them. It gnawed at him—Hadley was right, splitting up in a strange place was the wrong choice, even if they hadn’t found any real danger yet. He just knew it. Same as he knew that Mars would keep turning, same as he knew, that awful day, it was time to leave. Sure as his brand tugged slight and gentle north.

“Lumen?”

He looked up. Hadley was staring at the ceiling, lost in thought almost, but her brow was furrowed and her words too slow and sure.

“Lumen, did SAIL catch footage of that drone that went after me?”

Damn it—why hadn’t he thought of that? Because thinking of that is Captain’s job, he tried to tell himself as he pulled the logs up and started flicking through them faster than human sight could follow. Yeah, but I’m her second.

The image seemed to take ages to load to his sharpened, focused mind, though he knew it was seconds, just seconds. His shell creaked as his hands went tight.

Small, too small, but there. “SAIL, zoom in on that.” He tapped the screen.

“Processing… Sharpening image.” It filled the screen and the blur began to filter away, a tiny pencil animation playing over the edges as SAIL worked.

Lumen didn’t quite recognize it, but it was familiar. What would Captain—what would our Nyota do? “SAIL, can ya cross-reference it with what else we got on file?” It wasn’t how she would have said it, but he was still Lumen when all was said and done.

SAIL whirred. “Accessing database. Please wait.”

Lumen heard the bedsheets rustle and felt movement near his shoulder.

“I know I should stay in bed.” Hadley pulled a chair over. “But I’m going to watch.”

Lumen just accepted that. She knew what she was doing. A little better than their Captain about that, at any rate.

The image shrank over to one side and several others filled the empty space. “Reference complete.” SAIL sounded almost smug. “Matches found.”

Lumen stared at the screen. Hadley hissed beside him, but he didn’t look away. After all these months of silence.

“Hadley, get those stims.”

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Twisted Tarot III — The Empress

“Think like a queen. A queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another stepping stone to greatness.”

The Empress, Upright: femininity, beauty, nature, nurturing, abundance

The Empress, Reversed: creative block, dependence on others

He rules over his followers as a quintessential mother would her children: with a stern yet well-meaning heart. Though surrounded by life’s luxuries and blessed with beauty, he strives for something more, something greater than the role he has been assigned to play. The eyes of the world are on him as he ascends to center stage, and, with bated breath, the audience waits for the next act to start.

Reveal the Shape of thy Soul...

... Vil Schoenheit!

The boy with the wolf ears was back again.

His bushy tail stuck out like a sore thumb from the bush he was in.

“... I know you’re there,” Vil called to him. “Come out.”

“... You noticed me?”

“Of course I did. You’re not doing a very good job at hiding.”

His wolf ears flattened as a disappointed face poked out of the shrubbery. The boy was tall for his age, with a face that seemed more comfortable affixed in a scowl than a smile--though it was difficult to take him seriously with bits of leaves and a twig sticking out of his hair.

Vil’s mouth pinched into a slight frown. “You’ve got stuff stuck in your hair.”

“I do?” He rapidly shook his head back and forth, shucking off some of the foliage. The twig remained, along with a few particularly stubborn leaves. “... Did I get it?”

“Not quite. It’s more to your le... You know what? Come here, I’ll get it for you.”

He raised an eyebrow, but approached as Vil advised. His strides were less like that of a wolf and more like those of a tentative puppy. When he was within range, he bowed his head toward Vil, allowing him to make short work of correcting his hair.

“Thanks.” The beastman glanced up again, staring at Vil with curious eyes—Vil, who boasted a smooth, glowing complexion and magnetic violet eyes. His locks were like spun gold, and he moved with the grace and the dignity of a royal as he cast aside the twig once stuck to the wolf.

With a flick of the wrist, the thin piece of wood was sent sailing far away. A scarlet arc appeared for a moment before flickering out of view.

He caught a phantom sparkle on Vil’s fingers and his eyes immediately honed in on it. “What’s that?”

“My nail polish?” Vil rotated his hand to show off the shade on his shapely nails: crimson with a shot of golden shimmer. “It’s called Appley Ever After.”

“It’s very...” He scrounged around for the right word, finally arriving at, “noticable?”

“It has to be. The director for my last commercial shoot wanted a strong pop of color to catch the viewer’s eye.” Vil stopped himself, finding that the wolf boy was now gawking at him with an intense stare. “Why are you speaking to me again? You know who I am, don’t you?”

“You’re the new kid, right? I’ve seen you around a few times.”

“Yes.”

Vil let the word linger in the air between them, let it permeate in their pores. Waiting for him to say something else, the slew of names he had become so accustomed to, the looks and the whispers as he passed.

Son of a celebrity, born into stardom, destined to follow in his famous father’s footsteps.

Witch. Bully. Bad guy. Backstabber. Liar. Black-hearted. Wicked. Twisted. The very same as all of the roles he played.

A villain, beautiful and deadly in all the wrong ways.

But it didn’t come.

“... I’m Jack,” he said gruffly, sticking a hand out. “What’s your name?”

“Vil.” He slipped his polished fingers into Jack’s grip and firmly shook. “You’re the one that chased those boys off the other day.”

“They were saying some stupid things,” the wolf snorted, not a hint of regret for his actions.

“It’s what people do.” Venom flecked Vil’s voice. “They look at you and they judge you. They make assumptions about you and form expectations before they even get to know you.”

They see him, but they don’t know him—not at all. His voice could only cut so far, his smile could only shine so bright.

Look at me. See me. The real me.

Jack did.

Vil’s chest swelled with hope. “Thank you for giving me a chance.”

“It’s what anyone would do,” Jack insisted, brushing off Vil’s gratitude. His ears twitched, and his tail swayed eagerly, betraying him. “Don’t worry about those jerks. They aren’t worth the energy.”

Vil’s smile was bittersweet. “I can’t exactly argue with my audience, can I?”

“You shouldn’t have to put up with that kind of treatment, though.”

“It’s the reality of the entertainment business,” Vil quipped, holding his head high. “If I can’t handle some nasty comments, I wouldn’t have lasted as long as I have in this industry.”

“You’re stronger than you look.”

“Well, looks can be deceiving, can’t they?” Vil smirked. “Both for me and for you. You’re much less scary than those kids made you out to be—just a big softie.”

“Wh-What...!” Jack’s serious face broke, his fur flaring. “I’m NOT a softie!! Take that back right now!!”

“You won’t. You’re too nice to lay a hand on someone that did nothing wrong.”

“Grrr.”

“Be grumpy if you want, but your actions speak much louder than your words.” Vil laughed softly to himself. “It’s like a movie. No one knows a hero’s a hero because they say they are. A hero is a hero because of the things they do.”

“Are you calling me a hero? Look who’s being the nice one now.”

“Enjoy it while you can. Before you realize it, I’ll have snatched that title up from you.”

This time, Vil’s smile was a genuine one. It was not true and noble as a hero’s heart, but it had a sharpness to it—challenge and determination and all the pointedness of his ambition.

“All the world’s my stage, and I’m the lead. I’ll make them all see beyond the beauty and bend a knee—just you wait.”

[oswildin]

A Character Analysis: The Master (Dhawan!Master Specifically)

I’ve seen a lot of people discussing the character arc of The Master, and how there seems to be a bit of discontent about Dhawan!Master could be after Missy.

But I’m here to argue that it makes perfect sense.

I’ve stated in a previous post with another user how I feel each Master (like The Doctor) has their own issues and traits that differ, but ultimately they all share the same core feelings/beliefs. If we take a closer look at the NuWho incarnations of The Master, they present as the following:

Simm!Master - Feels out of control, needs to be in charge, trying to figure out what the drums mean and why it’s happening to him. He finally gets his answer, but again is left feeling out of control as he was purely a pawn in the Timelords plan to return from the Time War. Ultimately, he takes control by sacrificing himself to ensure they get sent back. His need for control can also be seen when he refuses to regenerate with 10. He wanted to be special, to one up the Doctor.

Missy - Wishes to be better, to be more like The Doctor, even goes so far as to also have a Scottish accent, and tries to push The Doctors boundaries in multiple ways (especially with Clara when she puts her in a dalek). Ultimately, she just wanted her friend back, but knew in reality there was too much damage for it to be smooth sailing. She tries to unlearn years of character traits, but in the end was brought down by herself (Simm!Master), in which all she can do is laugh at the irony. She wanted to be The Doctor’s equal.

Dhawan!Master - Finds out the truth about The Timelords, loss of identity (very similar to The Doctor herself), full of calculated rage, self-hatred and most of all a new motivation. Missy showed him he was capable of change, but the only person stopping him, was himself. So what was the point? If it wasn’t an easy road, why bother? Especially after finding out the truth about their origins. He’s at war with himself, as well as The Doctor, he tries to make her understand the only way he knows how. Chaos. He wanted her to understand why.

There’s no denying that 13 doesn’t have nearly as much empathy or compassion for The Master this time round. 10 tried to reason with the Master, even forgave him and offered a truce. 12 was the closest to understanding Missy, actually starting to build a bridge, realising his own wrong doings, whilst trying to teach her his way of doing things. Whereas 13… She seems done, fed up, irritated by him. She doesn’t even try to reason with him, she just stops him, even going so far as to letting him endure god knows how many years of torture via the Nazi’s… Removing his perception filter and framing him as a double agent… That’s not very Doctor-like.

Of course his rage is going to explode.

Perhaps she thought he would get away, it’s what he does, but she couldn’t be sure, yet she still did it.

Now whilst I think The Master obviously has some envy towards the Doctor, I don’t necessarily believe it’s all in hatred, which is how he has been portrayed this arc, that everything he is, is because of The Doctor. I would like to believe that he destroyed Gallifrey for the Doctor. In his own way, he cares for her, and finding out what they did to a child? A child who was once his friend?

And even when he shows the Doctor the truth, she turns on him, rather than trying to understand why, she simply just turns her back on him. He did what he thought was right, exactly as she did in the Time War. But she doesn’t see it that way, because she doesn’t have that understanding of him. Not anymore.

In TPOTD, The Master is a lot more controlled and calculated, whilst still unhinged in his own way. At this point, I feel he is truly just tired. He’s tired of being him. Him trying to become The Doctor wasn’t in malice, it was a last ditched effort to try and get The Doctor to see, to understand, that they weren’t so different. It was almost like a cry for compassion, which no one seems to hear. Even in the end, when he faces her one last time, she turns her back on him, leaving him for dead (which wouldn’t be the first time).

Him choosing to kill her was a spur of the moment retaliation. Perhaps if she had gone and helped him, it wouldn’t have happened. Or maybe it would have regardless. Perhaps he just didn’t want to die alone. He was ready to give up the fight, but he didn’t want to do it alone. If he wanted to, he would’ve done, he had multiple chances.

The Master we witnessed during 13s run was a man full to the brim of trauma, alienation, loss of identity and anger. That’s why he’s the way he is. It’s not so out of character for The Master to flip flop between doing the right thing and the wrong thing. This is shown with Simm!Master when he sends the Timelords back, and with Missy as she constantly has a back and forth battle with herself to want to be better… So when it comes to Dhawan!Master, it feels his right and wrong compass is broken, because he no longer knows what is considered right or wrong anymore.

So for me, Dhawan!Master is after Missy, and it makes sense.

[sixteenthshen]

post-finale stuff

Possible spoilers. Beware

Last night, I happened to check the scriptwriter's Weibo and saw that she had liked this fan's post. It's the only non-work related Weibo post that she had liked, so of course, I went to read it. 

The fact that this is the only fan post she's given her approval to must mean that it is on point and she agrees with the characterisation. I thought it's pretty good, so I've gone ahead to translate it here. I own 0 rights to this. I just thought it's a good perspective that may help others like me who struggled with the ending. 

I think I've mostly made my peace with it now, and to sum it up:

Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all that they are. 

A-Xu never once blamed Lao Wen for how things turned out because he understood that. And he’s clearly a better person than I am (lol).

Let me be clear about my stand - the real victim of how the drama unfolded in the last six episodes is WKX. When we feel our hearts ache for ZZS, it's because the show let down WKX (the character). If your heart is only hurting for WKX during episodes 33-34, you should try to ship WKX with someone else, ok? If you think the last six episodes were great and that WKX was very romantic (and only romantic), then I honestly don't know what to say. 

I ship wenzhou. That means I like both Wen Kexing and Zhou Zishu. I want them to love each other, be good to each other and live happily ever after. And I want them not to be OOC. 

The rest behind the cut. Spoilers for the whole drama. 

------- 

First, the source. Here is a link to that Weibo post, by 爱吐槽的栗小姐. I will delete this if requested by the OP - because this is really in a grey area imo. But I think the intention of a public post is for it to be shared? (especially something like this, which argues a point) 

Secondly, the poster does try to be fair in her post, but as the problem here is WKX's ruined characterisation, ZZS's character is analysed primarily concerning this issue only. There's quite a bit left to ZZS's character and backstory that isn't relevant. I believe that's why the post doesn't elaborate on it, or so I hope.

-------

Ever since WKX faked his death, I received three to four waves of fellow sister fans' mournful wails: "Lao Wen actually faked his death; does he have a heart?" "They were supposed to be of the same heart and treat each other with honesty. How did they regress?" "What happened to their innate soulmate-ness?" "Why does A-Xu always say to face things together, yet Lao Wen always keeps his plans from him?" "A-Xu loves Lao Wen, yet Lao Wen only loves himself"…….

Wait. What have you guys misunderstood about the meaning of soulmates? 

Soulmates are about values, but a person's behaviour… that's methodology FFS! 

(Do they no longer teach this in political affairs class in high school anymore?) 

Wenzhou, these soulmates, are incomparably compatible and mesh well in terms of values. According to the scriptwriter, the entire jianghu wants and tries to get the pieces of Glazed Armour, save the two of them. Not only do they not care for the peerless martial arts, immense power, nor the massive wealth that the Glazed Armour represents, they don't even care for the power they hold in their hands –Ghost Valley and the Window of Heaven. Both of them willing to give it up without a second thought. 

Before they met each other, they were so tired of (ZZS) and so angry at (WKX) this earthly world that they didn't even want to live on anymore. 

After they met each other, they gradually began to feel the warmth in this world again. How nice it would be if they could live in seclusion, hand in hand and just bask in the sun. 

In this world, where everyone else is fighting for power or wealth, they are true soulmates. To intelligent people like them, whether or not they're honest about their identities or secrets is merely a matter of formality. They had already determined their attraction to the other's soul early on and have never doubted it. 

There may be some here who would criticise loudly at this point, "Then can't you be more considerate for your soulmate (the actual phrased used is "spiritual companion")? A-Xu has said many times, let's face everything together, I'll bet that you will be honest with me. If you really love him, then why can't you care for his feelings?" 

----- You guys, you've never been married. 

If two souls meeting can naturally resolve all behavioural conflicts and disagreements, then the theory of "breaking in" * would not exist. 

Let us take a look at what kind of a person WKX and ZZS each are.

Wen Kexing, he's a lone wolf. 

After his parents' death and his entering the Ghost Valley, his smooth sailing life suddenly fell off a cliff. Ever since then, the only person he could rely on was himself. That deep-seated hatred is carved into his bones, yet he can't speak of it to anyone else. He isn't the same type of person as the rest of the ghosts in the Ghost Valley; he isn't the same type of person as A-Xiang, who he raised. If we talk about the world and everyone who lives in it, he doesn't have any fetters or feels any (positive) emotions. 

His supposed craziness is a form of indifference. He's indifferent to others' lives, nor his own, because he just doesn't care. (T/N: I think he does care for his own life, but only for revenge, after that, he's indifferent. Indifferent isn't suicidal. I don't know why some fans seem to be confusing the two. Although he didn't plan to, if he somehow manages to stay alive after getting his revenge, WKX will continue to live on, even if it's only to keep A-Xiang happy because he is indifferent.)

Growing up like this, being solitary became his style. He's used to doing everything alone, used to making his own decisions, used to digesting all his emotions himself. 

Every time he argues with A-Xu, he digests his emotions himself. The next day, he faces A-Xu with a smile again. 

This is how he loves, to take it upon himself to face danger, difficulty and pain alone. It's how he had supported A-Xiang all these years in the Ghost Valley and what he's used to. 

While Zhou Zishu, he's a lead horse (of a herd). ** 

Since a very young age, he's taught to take responsibility. He's used to bearing everything on his shoulders, be it the responsibility of his family or the responsibility for the Four Seasons Manor, even the responsibility for saving commoners from disasters. 

Unlike the lone wolf, the lead horse is ultimately a social animal. 

Regardless of his identity as the Manor Lord of the Four Seasons Manor or the Leader of the Window of Heaven, he's always the one to lead the herd and rarely fights alone. So, A-Xu not only has leadership ability but more than that, he also knows how to be tolerant and accepting of the differences of his team members. You can see the various ways he managed to influence Lao Wen along the road; he's firm when he needs to be and soft the other times. It's absolutely textbook in managing your lover workplace management. 

Zhou Zishu believes in communication whenever there's a problem, that they should be open and honest. So, teamwork is what he's used to. 

Does it mean that when a horse and lone wolf fall in love, that there won't be a breaking in period? 

Obviously not. 

I guess this is where some may say again, "isn't this part of a character's arc/development? The two of them quarrel time and time again. Did WKX not grow at all from it?" 

Of course, after meeting each other, they both grew and saved each other.

When he first left Window of Heaven, A-Xu was lonely with regret. Unlike the lone wolf who's used to doing everything alone, a lead horse without the last of his herd has no way to bear the bone-deep loneliness and merciless self-recrimination.

ZZS wandered around this world aimlessly until Lao Wen started pestering him, until he picked up Zhang Chengling, right up until he felt he hadn't singlehandedly destroyed the Four Seasons Manor. This lead horse finally regained a goal in life. He gained a partner and a lover. Lao Wen sticks to him, Chengling relies on him, and the abandoned Four Seasons Manor became like-new in his hands. He finally reconciles with himself. 

When he first came out of the valley, Lao Wen carried a rage strong enough to burn the world down. But when he met A-Xu, he also met the beauty of the world. 

When the Four Sages of Anji died, WKX understood how he caused innocent suffering. When Gao Chong walked to his death knowingly, he understood that although some may desire power, they could still be righteous and upstanding people. When he learned of everything Long Que sacrificed to protect his family***, he finally relaxed his guard. 

There were so many types of good people and things that he saw along this journey that he hadn't seen in the Ghost Valley. When A-Xu told him he was a good person as they basked in the sun, he genuinely wanted to return to the human (vs ghost) realm and be a good man. 

Along their journey, A-Xu made up for the morals and values that WKX lost in the Ghost Valley and showed him a new world outlook. He appeased Lao Wen's anger, tempered his extremism. The process wasn't easy, but not that difficult either, because, in the end, Lao Wen is kind at heart. 

But in the end, being a lone wolf is how he survived and succeeded in a place like the Ghost Valley. When A-Xu was so heavily injured and needed a lot of rest (for Wu Xi) to save his life, Lao Wen suddenly recalled his enemies and how such an excellent opportunity to take revenge just fell into his lap. Everything was in place, and all he needed to do was hide it from A-Xu; he could leave for a short while and have it settled quickly. Upon returning, he could then live happily ever after with his wife. To a crazy lone wolf, why would he not take a gamble? 

What he couldn't predict was the news would've been leaked (to A-Xu), and he didn't know that by doing so, he would've forever lost his love. 

Both of them were using their own methods to love the other person. Zhou Zishu is more forgiving and accepting because being forgiving is in his blood. While what WKX learned in his years in the Ghost Valley is -- love needs to be protected, like how he has A-Xiang, who he considers a sister, call himself master (to protect her). 

Only when faced with painful consequences can a person's deep-rooted habits and approach to things change. So I don't think faking his death ruined the characterisation of Wen Kexing, but I regret that the last two episodes did not have a scene to show us Lao Wen's heartbreak when he learns the truth. 

Until I know what it feels like to have lost you, I will only love you in my own way. 

T/N: 

*I can't think of the correct phrase for this as I don't read all that much about relationships >< please let me know if you know of it. Here, I'm referring to the process of wearing something new (like shoes) that will hurt at the start until it becomes soft and comfortable. 

** I did some side-reading, and omg, A-Xu is TOTALLY the lead mare. Although he's not the stallion and weak/dying for most of the show, he's the head of their little family, and he expects "to be obeyed", aka, I'm not going to learn how to cook. Call me for dinner. Kthxbye. 

From Rutgers' website: A herd of wild horses consists of one or two stallions, a group of mares, and their foals. The leader of the herd is usually an older mare (the "alpha mare"), even though one stallion owns the herd. She maintains her dominant role even though she may be physically weaker than the others. The older mare has had more experiences, more close encounters, and survived more threats than any other horse in the herd. The requirement of the lead horse is not strength or size; if this were so, then humans could never dominate a horse. Dominance is established not only through aggression but also through attitudes that let the other horses know she expects to be obeyed.

***I think this is important here because WKX wasn't crying for his loss. I think a big part of him was realising not everyone in the world was callous and turned their backs on his parents, that he could've gone his whole life without ever discovering what sacrifices some people have made. Good people suffer quietly and in silence. It's a big moment to realise he was wrong about many things that he had let hatred blind himself to the world. Because although he was sad about the Four Sages and somewhat shocked by Gao Chong's death, he hadn't truly faced up to his actions until now. 

(screenshot of the scriptwriter liking the above post) 

------

To add: 

I'm not sure how many of you read my "opinion" posts, but I've been struggling to find a way to accept the last six episodes of Word of Honor.  I first tried looking at open forum postings, comments, and Tumblr posts. None of it worked because it was just arguing and emotions and no one made points good enough for me to accept things. 

So I gave up and went back to reading Chinese sites. I found many posts discussing the plot. Some I liked, some I didn't, but none satisfied my need for a reasonable explanation. I felt they had biases (both ways), or else it lacked logic. After a time, I realised that I should be looking for WKX-stans (or pro-WKX fans) because they would be more motivated to explain his side, but also because well-written posts by wenzhou-fans & ZZS-stans made me super sad.

I'm sorry, but those who keep trying to explain why the ending was good completely missed that episodes 32-34 are the real problem to those who don't like it and only focused on 36. I can understand if people don't think those episodes are a problem, but no one could provide an articulate and sensible reason. There are just too few well-reasoned plot-focused posts in English (sorry). I've seen too many examples of WKX-fans arguing with people who are upset about the ending, backed by nothing more than "look how much WKX suffers, woe is him. And how romantic is this????" *dies* 

Lastly, if you spot anything inaccurate, let me know & I will correct it.

[ilikekidsshows]

One thing that pisses me off not just about the miraculous fandom but modern fandoms is fans inability to consume long overarching stories.

Like so many people are complaining about how long the reveal is taking or why haven't certain characters outgrown this trait yet or why is this character arc botched or abandoned. Like guys we just got the confirmation this show will be 7 seasons long PLUS like 3 tv specials. We're only roughly halfway through the series.

Once the reveal happens half the tension in the show is gone! I'm not saying leave the reveal till season 7 and make us wait 9 years this isn't HIMYM but miraculous is not a fast paced story. It's a long haul story. I just wish more fans would be patient. Miraculous is in the extremely fortunate and rare position that it will have a conclusive end and not be suddenly cancelled. That was and still is a huge problem for shows and cartoons with dedicated fans but networks pull the plug for stupid ass reasons.

So miraculous fans please chill the fuck out on things not resolving right away. We still have 78+ episodes plus the tv specials. If we get the end to certain things now it'll be so boring.

I think the concept of Instant Gratification describes the issue with many modern fandoms today. I hate to sound like I'm anti-technology, but the constant stream of quick and short bursts of entertainment allowed by the information age has made people more impatient. It's not about waiting for the climax to get a deeper sense of satisfaction, it's about getting that instant gratification right this instant. It's why one-shot fanfics are all over the place, when multi-chapter stories used to be just as common and popular, if not even more so, and it’s also why people are less willing to read a fic that’s still a work in progress. It's why people refuse to watch Youtube video essays even as they leave comments on the topic based on the title and thumbnail alone because, while they couldn't be assed to watch a 20-minute video (let alone an hour long one), they sure can spend that time calling the Youtuber names and making arguments the video actually already refutes. It's why a lot of online arguments happen only because one party read nothing but the first and maybe the last paragraph of someone's post and skipped all the explanation for their point of view (if I've ignored an counter argument for one of my posts, it was either because I missed it or because said counter argument did this. I have attention deficit issues so I do genuinely forget responses sometimes, but I'm also not writing a second essay for someone who's proven to me they won't read it).

Of course, it's only by constantly consuming only fast-paced content that you can become this impatient. People have different ideas about stories based on what stories they have encountered in the past.

Another thing that influences the Miraculous fandom in particular is that, while I love to show off exactly how much Miraculous has done to build up the overarching plotlines, Miraculous isn't really a show that's about a single story. It's easy to understand why people think it is one though: there's one main villain, we keep discovering more about the mythology, one of the main plot threads is the romantic relationship between the leads and singular episodes and plot elements tend to get payoff later. What is the purpose of a show if not to progress the story? Because the heroes aren't getting closer to defeating Gabriel or getting together, people think that the story isn't accomplishing anything.

I'll do a comparison to illustrate why these things aren't as clear-cut signs of a continuous storyline as people think. In the Spider-Man comics, you can pick any issue up and the chances are that the villain will be a part of Spider-Man's already established Rogues Gallery, who's back for more after who knows how many defeats, and those past defeats might even get referenced in callbacks to previous issues. It's also very possible that Peter and Mary Jane's relationship is the central focus with them not being together yet, having relationship problems or even having broken up (in really old issues the girl might be Gwen Stacy and short-term options have also always been available for romantic entanglements). Does this mean Spider-Man is a continuous story where the only point is that all the villains get put away for good and Peter and MJ live happily ever after? No, it doesn't. Spider-Man is designed to go on indefinitely, so there's no clear ending point. So, what is the point of Spider-Man then, if there is no Ending?

It used to be the single issue, because comic books used to have every issue be a stand-alone story about the hero and their supportive cast. These days it's more every three-to-six issues, because superhero comics are written to have short story arcs that can then be collected into trade paperbacks. A superhero series is not a single story; it's a series that functions as a story engine, meaning the series can generate several shorter stories where the hero helps fix a problem or solve a mystery.

In the superhero genre a villain will never get killed off or removed from stories permanently as long as the writers think they can still come up with stories to tell about them. The hero's romantic life will never be completely smooth sailing unless the writer is using other things to ramp up the stakes. Everything always allows for there to be another adventure.

I think the huge success of Avatar: the Last Airbender made people think that a series that is a single story is always superior to a series with multiple shorter plots. When I was liveblogging Sailor Moon, a viewer offered to give me a list of all the non-filler episodes because they genuinely thought I'd feel like I was wasting time on the show otherwise. This attitude is simply not based on fact. It's not fair to compare Miraculous Ladybug to Avatar, because they're both setting up to do completely different things. Miraculous Ladybug is trying to become a brand, like Batman or Spider-Man. It is part of the "Zag Heroes" lineup, a series of French-created superhero franchises to compete in the America-centric superhero market. This challenge is good for the genre, because Marvel and DC have started resembling each other more and more as these companies stew in their old ideas and copy everything that worked for the other one. The superhero genre needs new blood.

Also, Avatar: the Last Airbender first became popular by doing episodic plots for almost the entirety of the first season because it's actually not a wise choice to expect the audience to be willing to commit to a story that'll only give payoff later when working with an untested IP. Very often shows with longer story arcs start with the episodic format to hook people first, and sometimes the more linear plot is introduced specifically because the audience for the show is now expected to be both dedicated enough and older and capable of keeping up. Because, here's the thing: you can't expect little kids to remember every episode or even every character you've introduced in your show. I'm not sure if people are ready to hear that but I'm throwing it out there anyway. Kids are not dumb, they can understand more complex storylines, but many kids are still training their memory, so they might not remember the details of complex storylines that go on for too long.

This is why the news that Miraculous Ladybug's fourth season was going to have a recommended viewing order originally had me concerned. Miraculous is being branded for kids. The plot requiring too much skill in memorizing story details will make it less accessible to kids and might put those two additional seasons at risk. However, it seems that the "constantly changing status quo" concept of Truth, Lies and Gang of Secrets was a fluke and the evolution of the show is more subtle, so they might not be cutting the amount of episodes for those final seasons because the show is getting too complicated for kids to follow all the important details.

Regardless, Miraculous Ladybug being an adventure cartoon TV show instead of a comic book or a more cheaper-to-produce TV drama does mean that Miraculous Ladybug isn’t expected to go on for decades like a superhero comic or a soap opera. Because of this, it can have evolution and changes and even a planned ending. The show is expected to end at some point, even by the people making money off of it, mostly because making a cartoon like this indefinitely costs a lot of money, and kids’ adventure shows tend to see a decrease in returns if they go on for too long.

[addictedtostorytelling]

Say Grissom or Sara never left CSI, and had a baby. How do you think it would have played out on the show?

another anon:

I feel like Grissom would really be attentive and sweet to Sara if she were pregnant!🥺🥺💖💖

hi, anons!

first off, i have some speculation about various "circumstances under which grissom and sara might actually have a baby" scenarios here, if you're interested.

otherwise, i, uh, wrote a fic.

as preface to said fic, here's the situation i'm imagining, in terms of how things go differently from canon:

first thing, sara's whole s8 arc plays out differently: while grissom and sara are away from the lab between may and october while sara recovers from her abduction, sara not only focuses on healing her physical injuries but also on, you know, treating some of her longstanding mental and emotional health issues, as well. girl actually goes to therapy. starts taking some medication. eventually gets her brain chemistry evened out. works through some of her issues not just from what happened to her in the desert but a lifetime of trauma. embarks down the path of figuring out the cptsd thing. grissom is by her side the entire time.

moreover, unlike in canon, where it was heavily implied that grissom and sara had basically been incommunicado with everyone at the lab, including the lab administration, since sara was discharged from the hospital and hadn't checked in at all over their four months of paid leave time, this version of the story will (much more realistically, imo) have them actually in contact both with their teammates and with their bosses. that so, whereas in canon, it’s not until the week that sara returns to work that it is decided what’s to be done about her and grissom’s flagrant rules violation and her status on team graveyard, in this story, those details are worked out well in advance of her resuming active duty.

—and what has been worked out is ultimately a way more amenable arrangement than the canon one. rather than having sara switch to swing—which, in canon, is definitely something that exacerbates her already poor mental health situation and ultimately contributes to her leaving vegas in the manner that she does—grissom voluntarily agrees to take a pay cut so that catherine can be made co-shift supervisor with him on grave. though catherine is at first skeptical of the change because she likes to know she's earned the things she gets, everyone (and most vehemently grissom) swears up and down that this is something that should have, by all accounts, happened years ago anyway, and, honestly, she knows what they're saying is true, so eventually she accepts. she becomes sara's supervisor, with full control over her case assignments, evaluations, commendations, disciplinary action, scheduling, continuing education, etc. moreover, in order to keep everything kosher from a legal vantage, grissom and sara aren't allowed to work cases together without at least one other csi level iii's involvement, which is kind of a bummer for them but also something they can live with if it means that sara can stay on grave while keeping opportunistic defense attorneys at bay. while the adjustment to this new team structure is weird at first and there definitely are some growing pains to start out with, eventually everyone realizes that they actually kind of like this arrangement better than the old setup because grissom and catherine function really well as co-leaders with equal power divided between them, and it actually takes a lot of pressure off of grissom and sara's relationship for him not to be in charge of managing her anymore.

while it's still not completely smooth sailing for sara "getting back into the swing of things" after her abduction in this au—i mean, after all, she still did undergo a very significant trauma—the whole thing does ultimately end up going much, much better for her overall than her experience in canon does.

hence why she never runs away from vegas: she gets the help she needs, she has the support of grissom and her team family, she eventually resumes her routine, and ultimately everything is just better and more livable for her. no need to run off into the dark of night to escape.

as in canon, she and grissom end up getting engaged in mid-october '07.

unlike in canon, in mid-november ‘07, they actually do get married, eloping one day between shifts.

the story of where the baby comes in picks up from there.

nine chapters.

all already written. i’ll upload one per day until they’re all up.

indulgent, gsr geek baby fluff.

hope you enjoy!

thanks for the questions! please feel welcome to send more any time.

[stevetonyweekly]

SteveTony Weekly - May 9

Happy Sunday!! Here’s what I’ve been reading this week. As always, leave your fic authors some love if you read and enjoy their stories! 

**Indicates my recent favs 

~*~ 

pretty little thing by areiton (MCU/2K) 

Steve isn’t little. He isn’t fragile and precious, a treasure to be hoarded. Maybe he never was, but now, now, now with his too big body and his broad shoulders and miles of muscles--

Now he sure as hell isn’t.

It was the Fourth of July by seratonation (Proposal AU / 12K) 

Based on The Proposal. Steve has been Tony’s assistant for 3 years when he finds out that Tony is actually not American and is going to be deported. Tony talks Steve into getting married but Steve insists on seeing his family first. Tony invites himself along to make sure his plan doesn't go awry, but unfortunately Steve’s family is actually pretty amazing.

Object: Matrimony by BladoftheNebula (A/B/O /38K)

Omega Tony Stark craves adventure and an escape from the life his parents have planned for him in New York. He places a listing in a marriage catalogue to seek a match with an alpha out West, and Sheriff Steve Rogers answers his advertisement. But finding a nice alpha doesn't mean it's all smooth sailing from there...

- A Mail Order Bride AU -

***Papa Don’t Preach (Series) by FestiveFerret & SirSapling (Ultimates/102k) 

"Whoever did this has a reason, and Stark needs to be with someone who can protect him. He won’t exactly be able to protect himself like this.” Fury looked at the baby consideringly. “No, it’s you, Steve. Besides, he likes you. Suck it up, soldier, you’re stuck with him.”

Treasured by HashtagLEH (Warlord AU/9K) 

No one in Manhattan spoke their language – or at least, no one fessed up to it – and so all of the negotiating was done with Natasha acting as translator. Steve didn’t think it mattered, because he had told the ones who would leave the ship earlier that day that he had no intention of accepting any treaty, that they would lay siege to this city before the week was out.

But then Natasha stilled beside him at something that Stane had said to them, and Steve focused in, more alert. Something was wrong, he could feel it, but he didn’t know what with everyone speaking what may as well be gibberish all around him.

“He offers an unmated, untouched Omega,” she told him, not taking her eyes from the bald man at the other end of the table.

An unmated – what? He wanted to trade an Omega? Did he not have any idea of an Omega’s value? Surely his resources would be better spent whisking the Omega away to safety before the city was set to waste.

Natasha was looking to him for direction, confirmation, he didn’t know. So he told her, his voice placid and even and giving nothing away. “Accept the negotiations. Don’t let on that I want that Omega the most."

***Take My Heart Clean Apart by Mistmountainking (MCU/13K) 

He’s tired, so tired of waiting, tired of touches with no meaning, tired of holding his breath when Steve’s in the room, tired of keeping this love to himself.

 “I can’t—I can’t, if you don’t mean it.”

***

Tony comes home exhausted after an SI event. Steve acts as welcoming committee. It's an old, careworn routine they've perfected over the years, but tonight ends up going in a very different direction.

And the world keeps spinning by Perpetual Motion (Comic/15k) 

He considers everything he knows. His keys don't work. Bucky's in his apartment. There's a gun to his head. He doesn't have his phone or his Avengers tag. "I died."

T is for Thong by Elspethdixon (Marvel616/2K) 

Naked might actually have been slightly less distracting. Tony was… almost wearing… a tiny, tight scrap of red fabric that most definitely didn't hide anything.

***Orbiter dictum by schmevil (MCU/7K) 

Steve is at the sink, washing the few dishes that pizza for two generates, when he realizes that Tony is in love with him.

Nothing important happened today by thedevilchicken (MCU/17K) 

Steve's stuck in a time loop. Sometimes he's not sure he wants to get out of it.

***Off grid by Letterblade (MCU/7K) 

Steve and Tony go camping, bears are the greatest threat facing America, and tick tweezers are the best invention of the decade.

Some form of electricity by FestiveFerret & SirSapling (AU/57K) 

Steve doesn’t know what he’d do without Tony, and thank god he has him, because after getting the phone call that Bucky’s alive, everything is a blur. But Tony gets him there, all the way to Germany. It isn’t until he’s watching his friend lie motionless in a hospital bed that it really hits him.

Bucky is coming home, and he’s coming home broken.

The stark-tangled man with a crappy plan by Serinah (A/B/O / 13K) 

*At first, it seemed to be an easy job: find the O, secure the O, and hand him over to his guardian and the fiance. Simple. Unfortunately, the omega wasn't onboard. At all.*

OR:

Steve has to return a runaway omega to his guardian Mr. Stane.

Stories we never tell by ashes0909 (A/B/O / 32K

One could argue, it was none of Steve’s business. The omega was obviously bonded to the alpha, even if the bond was one-way. That bite was all society needed to overlook the transgressions that Steve had witnessed on the sidewalk. But Steve wasn’t society, and waking up decades in the future, he’d been disappointed by what had changed and what had very much stayed the same.

As hoarded as gold by FestiveFerret (Soulmate AU/12K) 

Steve wakes up in a new world, in 2008, and joins the Avengers where he finally gets to meet the man whose name has been imprinted on his skin since birth. But Tony Stark is closed-off, distant, and disinterested. While Steve is trying to come to grips with finding out his soulmate doesn't want him, he can't help but notice the decline of Tony's health. Worried about his heart after the arc reactor, Steve steps up to help him, but when Tony confesses what's really wrong, it's not at all what Steve expected.

Patience by FestiveFerret & SirSapling (AU / 8K) 

Try as he might, Steve just couldn't seem to paint the arc reactor quite right. And it was driving him crazy.

***Love’s such an old-fashioned word by AnnieD (MCU/11K) 

Steve gets the very brilliant idea that he and Tony should date, but Tony needs some convincing.

I saw cap kissing santa claus by Mizzy (Marvel 616/7K)

When Tony dressed as Santa for Queen County Hospital's annual toy drive, he wasn't expecting Steve to recognize him...as Iron Man.

Disjointed by veryvincible (Horror /16k) 

His hands— cold, clammy, lightly trembling— reached for the glass of water on his nightstand. His grip was tight; he knew he would drop it if given the chance.

It was lukewarm against his lips, and wholly unsatisfying. His forearms shook slightly with the tension, the tremors in his hands causing a noticeable shift in the water. It had a syrup-y quality to it as it dipped back and forth in its glass, almost, though he hadn’t noticed the difference in texture as he drank. The longer he stared, the lower the viscosity, as if it noticed him perceiving it and willfully moved with less ease.

Christmas affair by Neverever (MCU/6K) 

Tony thinks that Steve will be proposing to him after many years of living together, except that Steve has a secret that could ruin it all.

Unknown caller (Do Not Engage) by gottalovev (Non-Powered/13k) 

Steve had one job: exchange a couple of texts with a guy who thought he had Natasha's number, and let him down gently. It ends up being a lot more complicated than that.

***Genesis by teaberryblue (Ultimates/35k) 

Reluctant to make the truth about their secret weapon known, the American Government tells the world that Captain America is a man named Steve Rogers. According to public record, he died, tragically, in 1945, and he became legend.

In 1998, the Avengers find a body trapped in ice.

She's alive.

Her name is Eve.

She has Captain America's shield.

[extant-exhaustion]

**SPOILERS AHEAD**

I have decided to curse the world this hellsite with my fandom Hot Takes™. So, let's start off with a bang:

[spoiler]'s reincarnation in Hunter x Hunter was a bad choice both narratively and thematically.

Everything you read below is my opinion. You don’t have to agree by any means, and I definitely welcome friendly discourse!

Kite's reincarnation in Hunter x Hunter was a bad choice both narratively and thematically.

So...yeah. Here's the thing, using HxH and Yu Yu Hakusho as evidence (and I'm sure I'll expand on this in another post), it seems that Yoshihiro Togashi has real trouble killing off prominent "good guys." He takes frequent advantage of the deus ex machina, the rebirth, the second chance at life for whatever-the-heck-reason.

And sure, sometimes that's fine. Sometimes it makes sense and is essential to the plot. Yusuke dies in episode 1 of YYH, but it's essential to his entire story that he comes back to life. (Other reincarnations in that series don’t feel nearly as valid, but that’s for another post.) And then we have HxH and Kite...

Kite's death in the Chimera Ant Arc is so integral to Gon and Killua's stories. It is a shocking and brutal reminder of the dangers of their chosen profession and the uncaring reality of nature. As a Hunter, Kite spent a significant amount of time around dangerous beasts and in precarious terrain. He knew and was prepared for the risks when the exploration team set out to discover what was happening with the chimera ants. And he made it clear that he didn't think Gon and Killua were ready for what they might face.

As a character, Kite is very important to Gon's growth, both as someone he looks up to and as a close connection to his father. And thus, Kite's death is catastrophic to Gon's psyche. He goes straight into the denial stage of grief and stays there through the month between Kite's death and when they see his reanimated corpse after its recovery by Knuckle and Shoot (et al.).

He then remains in that denial through the invasion plan and the subsequent battles with the chimera ant royal guards, etc. Rather than accepting death as a part of life (even when it comes about so cruelly), Gon keeps searching for an out, a way to "fix" Kite and thus assuage his guilt and heal his own pain after losing someone dear to him (especially in a way that directly related to his and Killua's presence in the moment of Pitou's attack).

Now, we have to remember that Gon is thirteen. So his grief process is understandably jumbled. His reaction to Kite's death—including his disbelief and denial—is more than legitimate. And his catastrophic breakdown that results from having to move jarringly from denial to acceptance—and smashing right into the wall that is rage—makes perfect sense for his narrative. It's a masterfully written arc and Togashi builds Gon's character so much within those chapters.

But here's where I have an issue—and it’s a given that this is common in shonen manga, but I’m going to focus particularly on Togashi’s writing.

The problem is with how he addresses death in both of his popular manga, which is that...he doesn't. He just…doesn’t. As a writer, he chooses to bring "good" characters back from the dead over and over again, and often with no narrative purpose. I'll make a post about how this relates to YYH sometime, but for now, let's focus on Kite.

Bringing Kite back from the dead, albeit in a reincarnated, not-quite-him way, was a bad choice narratively and thematically.

Gon's (and Killua's) growth in the CAA hinged very integrally on losing Kite. It was important that Kite was dead. Actually, literally, in every sense of the word, dead. Because that death was what led to Gon facing a litany of horrible, mature, adult emotions and situations that brought him face to face with the fact that life is rarely smooth sailing from start to finish, and the life of a Hunter is particularly dangerous. He had to grow because of that loss and would have continued to in the aftermath of his fight with Pitou.

But by bringing Kite back, by reincarnating him in a strange little ant body, Togashi brushes all of that growth right out the door. Yes, Gon will still have learned a lesson about how throwing everything away in a moment of rage and pain isn't the answer. But the growth that he and Killua went through because of their role in Kite's death? Gone. Nada. Zilch.

Bringing Kite back takes the pain of his death and tosses it out the window. Like, "Oh, well, he's alive again in some form, at least! So, we weren't really responsible for something fatal and disastrous, because it turned out okay in the end!" It takes the grief process and cuts it off at the knees, preventing Gon in particular from having to further explore his emotions and maturity in the face of his own and others’ mortality.

So where is the lesson? What is Gon supposed to take away from Kite dying—arguably in part because he and Killua were there? If Kite is back with no concrete consequences and measurable grief, what was the point? Narratively, it leaves audiences confused. Because Gon's development in the CAA was almost fully due to Kite's death, and the impermanence of that death distorts that development. It removes the lodestone from Gon's personal arc. If Kite isn't dead, the narrative tangles.

And thematically? Sigh. Just...the potential that Kite's death had to be an incredibly transformative moment in both Gon's and Killua's lives...it's completely trashed by reincarnating him. The deus ex machina of that "fix" leaves the themes of the CAA in a complete wreck. Because it meant something that Kite died. It meant something that two teenagers had to face death and cope with it and come out the other side to figure out who they were after experiencing something so brutal.

The CAA is one of the darker arcs I've seen in a shonen manga/anime, and the themes (up until Kite's reincarnation) were extraordinary——the brutality of nature; the nature of brutality; the line between humanity and savagery; the purpose of revenge or retribution; the lasting effects of grief and shared trauma; the depths of despair that lead back to brutality so cleanly...

Instead, Togashi swept those potential lessons away. And while I'm not saying he couldn't still reflect on it in some meaningful way (if HxH ever comes off hiatus...), as a reader/viewer, I have to say that this was one of the more disappointing moments in the series.

[omegawolverine]

Plesse tell me about queerness in the get down!!

okay okay queerness in the get down let's fuckn goooo

disclaimer: I havent watched this show in full for like 5 months at least, probably gonna get something wrong and/or forget some more important bits. also this wasnt proof read I just word vomited

tws: period typical homophobia, abuse mention, f slur use, bury your gays trope, overdose mention, mention of a creepy possible age gap (the age gap hasnt been confirmed so that's why its possible), cops

going from least to most prominent queer characters, let's start with mylene cruz!

so, from the beginning of this show she has an established romantic relationship with ezekiel (although the status of their actual relationship changes frequently throughout the show) and though this was a relationship she was hesitant to pursue, it is clear that she does have romantic feelings for him and if not for them both having growing careers in very different music genres (zeke specifically working in a genre that she repeatedly labels as bad because she thinks they're ruining records + that it isnt real music because they're using someone elses piece and rapping over it, that's not really important here tho lol) they probably wouldve had a much healthier, smooth sailing romance. that being said theres a few things that happen in the show that, while not explicitly clear, or even really good coding at that—to the point where you wont catch if you really arent looking for it (and trust me, I always look for coding, hers was just so little that it flew over my head until I saw someone else mention it)—are still cool to think about!

so, for starters, I wanna mention the toy box performance, which was performed by mylene and regina, who are best friends. that's all cool and shit, and you dont really think much about it...until you hear about the fact that the show runners purposely colored a lot of the scenes in that performance with the bi colors. like. the writers after the show ended basically said "oh yeah there was plans to make her coding more explicit, but our shit got cancelled soooo" and then dropped the fact that she was gonna be bi (or at least implies bi) in the series, which puts a new twist on a few things.

now, besides the bi coloring in the background of the toy box performance (which was mostly on scenes with her and regina, which involved a lot of uh,, lowkey lewd dancing. with each other. in very revealing outfits. wooooo), there's her music! I dont tend to read too much into this one bc, like I said before, her coding is fucking light and the writers themselves said they didnt really get to do much with it, but I think some stuff with her music is interesting. specifically how her, yolanda and regina's song set me free blew up because dizzee, resident (lowkey enby coded) bicon, got their song played in a queer club. also that the song was majorly important to dizzee and started playing literally right as he kissed a boy for the first time and realized "oh shit I like boys that's bonkers". also that the song can be taken in a gay way since literally the entire thing is about becoming your true self, fully and unapologetically, which is what both dizzee and mylene's entire character arcs are about. dizzee (and a lot of other queer people, apparently), heard this song about being set free and it resonated with them so much that they got that shit most of its popularity.

speaking of dizzee and mylene, they parallel each other a lot in the way that their arcs are about them realizing who they are, coming into themselves and no longer just letting people treat them like shit in a sense (dizzee starting to tell people essentially that they can call him weird all they want, they can make fun of how he acts, what he likes, how he dresses, etc. but he likes how he is and quite literally saying "it's okay to be an alien" as he has consistently compared himself to one throughout the show vs mylene learning that if she wants to be a disco singer she needs to put her foot down, not let anyone, not even the love of her life, not even her abusive father, stop her from achieving her dreams, etc. and continuing to pursue her career with or without their support). one more little parallel that I think is interesting is during I think s2 towards the end of the show is when dizzee and thor are shown together having fun with each other, painting all over the building and each other and are basically just being happy and in love together and then they have these clips of them being interspersed with clips of mylene at a party where she is starting to realize that if she wants to get anywhere she needs to be her own main priority and that she needs to put her career and her dream, which is what makes her the happiest, above all else if she wants to succeed. idk I just think how the show made these two into a weird parallel, accidental or not, is neat. maybe not an explicitly queer parallel, but I think at least how her music and whatnot helped dizzee, the main queer character in this show, blossom, is important.

moving on we got shaolin fantastic also known as "oh no your internalized homophobia is showing-"

so, heres a quick list of...interesting shao facts:

Consistently referred to as fag/faggot (shaolin fanfaggot is my personal favorite); he gets really defensive about this despite nobody actually thinking he's queer, it's just people being assholes to be assholes, and he is the only character consistently referred to using a slur, especially a homophobic one, especially for a "straight" character. dizzee, a canonically queer character, is called a fag less than shaolin is even though dizzee actively goes to gay clubs, has a not so secret dude he "hangs out with" and wont let anyone properly meet, paints his nails, wears less than straight clothes even by the 70s standards and is just all around the definition of fucking queer (and I mean like in the weird way, not the gay way). in fact theres only like once I can remember him being called a fag and it had nothing to do with him actually being gay it was literally just like thrown out there the same way you would call someone a bitch.

Has only shown sexual interest in women, yet refuses to have deeper relationships with women in general (possibly because of trauma but who knows) but takes his relationships with his "brothers", specifically zeke, very seriously

Tells zeke and zeke ONLY his real name when zeke was planning to stop being his friend bc shao more or less got boo boo, a like 14 year old black kid, arrested for selling hard drugs; he was clearly scared and trying to do anything to keep zeke around, literally chasing him down the street and hounding him until he got zeke to stop and argue with him

Kept threatening to beat up zeke in the end but couldn't actually bring himself to do so, instead saying that zeke is "fucking lucky" before walking away

Let's zeke get away with things that nobody else can, in general just has a weird soft spot for ezekiel that he shows with nobody else

when shao found dizzee with thor in a vaguely compromising situation (like they were just shirtless covered in paint sleeping next to each other but shao had also seen everything they painted on the walls ((which some of it was sus)), it was clear they had painted on each others bodies and dizzee had been routinely disappearing with this guy for weeks now yet not producing nearly as much art, at least, as far as we audience members know) he didnt judge him but instead, waited for him to get cleaned up and then told him something along the lines of "theres a reason why im so secretive blah blah blah [not everyone needs to know everything about me]", which, in context, kinda implies that he might be a lil. a lil homiesexual. jus a lil.

whenever even the possibility of zeke leaving him comes up he absolutely loses it. he has literally cost ezekiel life changing opportunities because he thought zeke would just up and leave him for them. this could be abandonment issues bc he's a severely traumatized character, and that probably does contribute to it, but it also is just not a reaction he has to any of their other friends just randomly dipping in and out of his life soooooo

generally speaking, this mfer has got either bisexual with a big hard on for zeke coding or homosexual with terrible internalized homophobia and still a hard on for zeke coding. either fucking way, that nigga gay. he gay as hell. gay as fuck man. there wasn't really much to analyze here tbh bc the coding is just so fucking obvious if you look for it or you are/have been a gay person who's dealt with at least a little bit of internalized homophobia.

also, just a sidenote, idk how fucking old shao, but I'm praying hes like at max 19 bc I'm pretty sure zeke is a minor in this show and shao definetly is not so the whole him being heavily implied to have a crush on ezekiel thing is kinda. oof. not oof if zeke is like 17 but any younger than that? OOF.

edit: apparently the characters are only supposed to be a year apart in age but i had no clue about that before writing this post and since shaos age was never actually stated in the show i naturally assumed he was an adult since his actor Looks Like An Adult. this is definetly on me to a certain extent, but i also never saw anything about this when trying to find our their ages so 🤷‍♀️ maybe i just didnt look deep enough, sorry!

now moving on to the main event...marcus dizzee kipling :]

so, first things first, let's talk enby coding bc him being bisexual was already confirmed!

um, to start off, I just wanna say I dont think this enby coding was intentional or even really coding, it's just moreso me being a dizzee kin on main and knowing as a transmasc enby he has very transmasc enby vibes. for example:

cool, gender neutral nickname that everyone calls him

paints nails various different colors

the whole wardrobe is just a transmasc enby heaven...fishnet shirts, jean overalls, jackets and cuffed pants galore, the big colorful pins, etc

gender neutral hairstyle (when I had my fro it was very sexy and made it easy to transition between hyper masc and vaguely fem, which is pog)

comparing himself to/representing himself consistently with an alien character (though this is meant to represent his sexuality, it could also double as a gender thing too, not neccesarily bc of the whole nonbinary alien trope but bc an enby who likes aliens might heavily identify or compare themselves to whatever their idea of an alien is, whether that just be a genderless entity or a motherfucker with fly style and no need to be perceived as anything other Wacky As Hell)

moving on from there, let's talk about how his queerness is presented to us and how, while it may be a really good piece of representation, especially coming from netflix, it still lacks in A Lot of places.

so, let's start with good things!

i personally really like the get down's queer rep with dizzee bc it's (for the most part) nonsexualized and very very soft, about dizzee figuring himself out and realizing there is a place where he fits in, and about two teenagers in the 70s falling in love over their shared passion for street art. it also features an interracial couple where both boys challenge stereotypes both about queer men and men of color, which is epic poggers and very sexy. this piece of rep specifically is very important to me bc I am a queer black person and even tho interracial relationships are mostly normalized now, I've still had people give me shit for primarily dating white people in a town that is...primarily white lol

mm anyways, I can also appreciate how in the get down, dizzee being represented by rumi the alien is not a thing specifically related to gender (as it often is) and instead is about his sexuality and just in general weirdness and how it has led to him being alienated amongst his peers, poc or otherwise. him seeing himself as an alien is not about just his queerness, which is important, it is about him being a queer black man who talks different, acts different, dresses different and is "soft"—he isnt a walking black male stereotype and he wouldnt have been seen as masculine back in the 70s by any stretch of the imagination. this can be relatable to a wide spectrum of queer poc, from queer black men currently who still have to deal with this shit or to people like myself who are afab neurodivergent mixed race enbies that have always been signaled out as weird and alienated for it. dizzee is god rep bc while he has a small part in this show, his parts are very impactful, hard hitting and show queer poc of all ages that they arent alone and that it's okay to "weird", you just need to embrace it because somebody will love you for you, as thor did for dizzee.

that being said theres um. some minor problemas here,,,

namely:

dizzee and thors first kiss

the lack of development this pairing got

the way dizzee was confirmed bisexual off screen, he never said the words himself, just showed interest in both genders

the way dizzee and thor were never even confirmed boyfriends or just fwb so most of the fandom just calls them boyfriends bc Why Not

dizzee was implied fucking DEAD??? AT THE END OF THE SERIES?????? AND THOR WAS IMPLIED ARRESTED?????????????

now, these might have been things that wouldve been fine had the show been given it's full run but it wasnt which is why we are now left with probelms.

so, from the top, let's go over these: dizzee and thor's first (and only "on screen") kiss was one that was shown in a montage of other queer people making over and doing other vaguely romantic/sexual things, one of those things being a whole ass naked titty being mouthed at, but the actual kiss...was just not shown? like they really did just say "yes they kissed <3 you know this from the context clues of it being in a montage with kissing, hickey giving and titty sucking <3 but no we will not show it <3" LIKE HELLO? I SAW A NAKED BOOBIE BUT NOT TWO MEN KISS??? HUH????????

also, dizzee and thor were both fucking high as hell during this bit like this isnt a terrible thing but it's also like sometimes you do shit when you're high that you wouldnt do sober and they just never kissed again on screen so like?? like idk that's not that bad but it does kinda irk me since they deadass got no other on screen intimacy after that unless you including painting on eacher other or sleeping next to each other on a shitty mattress but not touching at all during it bc they were both at opposite ends of the mattress like half way off it

so yeah, that was trash. then we got lack of development, which kinda goes with the "dizzee being a bisexual but he never says it in canon" thing cause like...okay dizzee was already sort of a side character from the get go like he wasnt the mc by any means, but he became way more of a background character as things continued until we basically only saw him for performances or when he was with thor, yet they got no fucking development as a pairing other than "dizzee realize he gay, he like thor, he and thor spend time together and ig probably do some gay stuff but we dont really know bc we only ever see them do graffiti together now" like?? tf am I supposed to do with that shit. answer. quickly. and then theres dizzee not being confirmed bisexual, which is just a running problem with shows literally doing everything to say a character is bi except for having the character just...say they're bi? which would be so easy? like a good way dizzee and thor couldve had some development is by thor teaching dizzee things about the queer community that he didnt even know existed, thor couldve helped him understand what being bi meant and helped him label himself and whatnot but instead we got an off screen confirmation that the writers had bisexual in mind when writing him. which is garbagé.

the whole thor and dizzee never having a confirmed relationship status is also a development problem cause like literally nobody knows if they were just friends who made out, maybe fucked, who knows, or if they were dating bc dizzee does give a love confession but a love confession doesn't mean there is a relationship, especially since thor didn't say he was in love either (as far as I remember, I could be wrong, plus whether or not that really happened or was apart of dizzee literally overdosing during a performance is unclear so 🤪)

and now for the biggest issue...bury your gays trope.

during the season 2 finale, dizzee and thor are chased by cops after they are found doing graffiti, one of the cops is able to catch thor while the other chases dizzee into a train tunnel and there is a train seen headed straight for him before the show cuts to black on a train horn. the show writers claim that if they had gotten another season, dizzee wouldve been alive but since they didnt and since that's essentially super fan trivia knowledge, most people dont fucking know that and instead had to watch a black queer teenager chose death over being fucking arrested by a white cop. on top of that, thor didnt see any of that shit because he was caught and the cop started hauling him off while dizzee was still being chased so thor literally has no clue where his friend/possible boyfriend fucking is or that he's likely dead in a goddamn tunnel all alone, unless you count the fucking pig that chased him in there who wouldve died too. this shows rep was so fucking good as far as most shows go on not having major fucking problems, on not being toxic and over sexualized, etc, etc. and then they just. killed a black queer teenager for no fucking reason. like it was literally the last episode ever, it would add nothing to the plot, it would just devastate fans and devastate it fucking did. I dont cry easy but seeing a character I identified with, who I had hyperfixated on, die because he'd rather that than be arrested is terrible. it fucking sucked.

so yeah. that's my all too extensive thoughts/analysis on the get down's queerness. theres definitely stuff I missed, or misinterpreted, or looked too much into, etc, etc., but this was a fun thing to spend time writing sooo yeah!! thanks for the ask anon, sorry this was just a big rambley info dump, but hopefully you get some enjoyment out of it since it took like 3 hours at least 😭😭 feel free to ask clarifying questions lol

[melanated-maddy]

TYTON

Hey welcome to this fan fiction. I recently finished war storm and I’m in love with Tyton. Couldn’t help but want to right a fic after seeing so little on this guy on tumblr. Don’t know if I’ll write more as got exams but if you like let me know! All characters and world and everything belongs to the queen herself Victoria Aveyard

Chapter 1

“Debark, debark, debark.”

Tyton was snapped out of his musings pale fingers still gripped against the fading cover of his book. They’d finally arrived back in Ascendant after another long plane journey. A year after the kingdom of Norta was officially dissolved with Cal’s abdication there was still unrest with the Silvers. Too many houses had attempted to feel comfortable on the sparkling throne. ‘Osanos says water comes after fire, Rhambos is taking strength and power a little too literally and Merandus is trying hard to distance themselves from the insanity their own brought forth in Maven and actually claim the throne. At least there’s no more Samos worries. That ship sailed or should I say smashed along with Volo’s head with his offspring are safely tucked away in the capital.’ The soldiers on the plane had started their move off some in a rush to get home to worried families and others ready to have a drink. Davidson was the closet family Tyton had after his own lost their lives to a raid. His mother, father and two younger brothers all gone in an instant. That instance was the first time Tyton’s ability was able to properly manifest. Properly surge. Properly show how dangerous he was. It was Davidson who found him when searching the wrecks of homes and families. Still holding his brother’s Aeon’s hand tears in his eyes. Davidson was always quiet even back in those days and knelt to Tyton’s small height hugging him close. After that day Davidson properly set about burying the family well allowing Tyton to grieve and giving him another place to call home. He’d never admit it, but Tyton was lucky...relieved that Davidson and Carmadon took him in. Even if those raiders who had taken his family from him deserved his rage, he was terrified of the lightning under his skin. With a huff, Tyton uncoiled his long body from his seat standing and stretching up to remind his muscles of their function. The suit he wore was dark not one of the traditional Montfort green it just would not do for some missions. Under his seat he pulled free the small bag carrying a bottle of water, bag of nuts and stored the book into it securely. It was the last thing he’d received from his parents and even so he still struggled to get through it properly. As Tyton turned to move out the aircraft door onto the tarmac he spotted Mare struggling to reach an overhead compartment to grab something. He quickly moved forward and grabbed hold of two items: a maroon scarf and backpack.

“Thanks.”

“No worries I’m always available to help the vertically challenged.”

Mare’s face turned into a vivid shade of crimson and she moved as if ready to punch his arm when Cal swung his head back into the cabin. He seemed exasperated which quickly shifted to a swift glare as his eyes settled on how close the two were.

“Tyton.”

“Cal.”

“Mare what's taking so long?”

“Difficulties getting the scarf and backpack you decided to thrust into the overhead bin. As well as being ready to obliterate string bean here.”

Tyton gave a chuckle, although he was slightly leaner than Cal a string bean he was not.

“Don’t worry just helping her out she’s still yours, your highness.”

Cal bristled with the label, but Tyton was already strolling out onto the blinding tarmac doused in bright light.

As he got his bearings about himself, Tyton could not help feeling the pulses of electricity going off in every person around hims body. Just as you could imagine different emotions and thoughts had different electric compositions. As people moved around he recognised stress signals, pulses of joy and shifts of concentration. The signals never went away but with time he’d found away to keep them working in tandem with him so he didn’t get overwhelmed.

“Tyton come on rides here.” Rafe called his hair in the sun giving the appearance of green flames.

Tyton walked to the transport, long legs eating up the distance in a few moments to be face to face with Rafe. Ella must’ve caught a different one as the storm addict’s blue hair was no where to be seen. Together the two walked towards Davidson who was speaking to Arezzo in hushed tones. With a nod she was dismissed walking instead of jumping to wherever she needed to go. Davidson turned to the two a smooth smile on his face and opened his mouth, but was interrupted by a quick trill.

“Rafe!”

A blur of orange smashed into Rafe’s chest holding him tightly as he clutched her back.

Laughing Rafe greeted her, “Iz, nice to see you too, but you’re crushing me.”

With one last tug, Izelle released her older brother a wide grin tugging on her lips as she looked up at him. Izelle, was Rafe’s little sister by a year who shared his dark brown skin smooth and even and bright smile. In her orange dress that spun around her knees and black combat boots, she giggled letting her hair of tight curls circling her head move slightly held back with an orange band.

“Is it wrong for me to have missed my dumb big brother? Am I wrong Tyton?”

Tyton smiled and shook his head as Rafe glared at him.

“So nice to know that it won’t be a strongarm that gets me but my sister’s choke hold.”

Iz shoved Rafe as he rolled his eyes and moved to put his bags in the transport while Iz turned to greet Tyton.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

And with that Tyton opened his arms and Izelle moved into them giving him a tight hug.

‘Her hugs are always great.’

“Thanks for looking out for Rafe. I’m one hundred percent sure he’s not dead somewhere because of you.”

A deep rumble erupted from Tyton as he shook his head. They walked to the transport as Tyton asked how she’d been.

“All good here finally ready to move onto the fourth arc only two more to go before I’m a qualified teacher of education.”

“That’s excellent. You’ve worked hard for it.”

“Yeah it’s been so long definitely the hardest thing I’ve faced, but it’ll be so worth it once I’m in a class with little guys.”

“Do you know what specialism you’ll take yet Izzy?”

In Montfort, classes were not segregated at all with children of all blood types getting the same education to the best standard they could. Those who were Ardent or Silver has supplementary classes to help in coming into their abilities. However, it was courtesy for teachers at normal school to specialise in understanding one blood type well so that support chains could be used in school for any student struggling.

“I’m not sure yet to be honest. I’ve still got to think, might swing for Ardent or Red they’ve already got lots of silver specialists.”

Tyton liked listening to Izzy speak. Her mind although more hyperactive than most was one he enjoyed feeling the thrum of. She would be an excellent teacher one who was fun and silly, but able to understand and be serious when needed. For all her loudness Rafe often called her the thunder to his lightning. As Izzy spoke she tended to often get enthralled by her words and lost her bearings of where she was. So much so she didn’t see a smaller transport squealing into her path. In seconds Tyron had pulled her back allowing the small buggy to rush past on its was.

“Izzy.”

“Ha sorry about that. Forgive me.”

And with a smile, all was forgiven.

“Come on Rafe is definitely going to start a mood if we don’t hurry up,” and with that she pulled his arm to the transport releasing him to clamber up and take a seat next to Rafe. For all the bickering and teasing they did the two siblings loved each other dearly. They had sought refuge in Montfort from the Piedmont principalities with their mother. The two remembered little about their original home as they had left so young, but the happiness Montfort gave them was all they needed. Forgetting all about her conversation with Tyton, Izzy poked Rafe to tell her all about Norta and what things they’d encountered. Izzy had never left Montfort. She was definitely not a soldier, barely remembering to tuck in her thumbs properly when punching Rafe and the Ardent abilities had only passed to him so a useful electricon on the battlefield she was not. The ride to Ascendant was bumpy, Davidson muttering about looking into the concrete and upkeep of the infrastructure when back home. The air rushed in as they sped across the landscapes moving closer to the capital with every second until the transport stopped in a quick halt. The stop was so fast Izzy almost span out of her seat if not for Rafe and Tyton’s arms coming to forth to stop her fall.

“What’s going-“

Davidson was cut off when a terrible crunch sounded off. Leaning forward, he could see one of the transports being crushed the metal casings crumbling against each other. Without a thought Davidson threw out a shield glowing blue in the setting sun surrounding the two vehicles.

“Raiders already?” Rafe hit his head against the seat in frustration before moving out of the car to help passengers in the afflicted vehicle. Tyton quickly went about feeling how many Raiders were out there without being told.

“10, all seems to be magnetron. 3 females, 7 males. Wait they’re leaving?”

“Leaving?”

“Yeah moving away.”

Davidson heaved a sigh, “Radio in for some teleporters for the wounded.”

“They’re already here.” Tyton looked out seeing that those badly injured were being jumped back. Being so close to Ascendant meant the teleporters could make the jump.

“Alright then, destroy that transport don’t leave anything of use behind for them.”

With that, Tyton moved to the transport now empty and absentmindedly called forth a storm preparing for a powerful bolt. The skies darkened as his storm came into existence. Davidson let the shield down for a moment to let the bolt come through. In a fraction of a second, a burning bolt of lighting came down from the sky smashing against the transport reducing it to dust and scorched earth. The air singed with crackle as the fire wreck obliterated. Tyton surveyed the scene inspecting the damage to see if it was at a high enough level to not be useful to a magnetron. Being happy with it he turned and started to walk back to Davidson and Izzy, Rafe already sitting in his seat. He was laughing at Izzy as she covered her ears wincing at the terrible sound of the lightning on metal. It was a sound not comfortable for most ears, but Tyton’s power was unheard of in an Ardent. He was different to the other electricons being able to handle electricity more naturally than even them. It didn’t take much for him to call a storm bolt of that magnitude. As he was within a few metres of the transport he suddenly felt a barrage of electrical energy moving towards them. Recognising it as the previous magnetrons he turned to quickly release brain lightning on them being able to drop 4 of them before one let off a spike. Moving out of the way he could do, but the spike still got him in the side forcing him to the ground. Davidson’s shields again went up and Tyton was pulled into the transport as it began to drive away with Davidson’s shields still up. Izzy clambered towards him pulling apart his suit to get a better look at the cut. Her hand pressed down hard as she told Rafe to get the medical kit under the seat. Tyton grasped onto her had holding it down as he grimaced from the pain. “You’re fine it’s only a scratch.” Izzy nervously laughed.

“Of course because scratches produce this much blood.”

“Shut up big baby. I’ve met toddlers tougher than you,” she grinned and Tyton smiled back focusing on her electricity and letting it calm him down in the transport racing back to Ascendant.

[lit-in-thy-heart]

hehe im glad you joined us for the hug prompts! I'll ask you for 14 - leaping hug with... mergwaine! hopefully that works for you otherwise second option for a ship would be mercelot!

thank you for the prompt!!! you will notice a theme with the other prompts (and each one that came in made me grin even more, you'll see why throughout this week) and i'll stick this under the cut because it is quite long for a prompt, i'm sorry.

hope that you enjoy it! 💖

feel free to send any other prompts

It was when Merlin’s eyes started to lose the mirth that Gwaine had suggested lightening their load with a game. Merlin had been reluctant, at first, to stray from the task at hand, but Gwaine had pointed out that they were halfway through the army’s boots and that they needed to take some sort of break before their arms cramped up.

Quite how hurling boots across the throne room alleviated the tension in their arms, Merlin wasn’t entirely sure. ‘Only with the ones we haven’t cleaned yet, right?’ he uncertainly asked Gwaine, picking up one particularly muddy boot.

Gwaine, having swung two boots over his shoulders, flicked back his hair. ‘Your choice, Merlin. We can either scuff the clean boots, or have to clean mud off the throne afterwards. Which I see as a rather appropriate metaphor.’

Frowning, Merlin turned over the boot in his hands. ‘What do you mean?’

‘Well, it’s always the common people cleaning the king’s image, isn’t it? Sanitising it. He’s always idolised by them, when he never deserves it.’

Mouth set in a grim line, Gwaine retreated to the back of the throne room and gripped the shaft of the boot, swinging it around his head and sending mud flying in all directions. As Merlin sheltered his head with one arm, Gwaine let go of the boot and watched with a satisfied smirk as it sailed across the room and landed firmly on the throne. The dim sunlight scattered across his face painted him in a mosaic of stained glass and Merlin’s hand faltered slightly, boot beginning to slip through his grasp.

Sparing Merlin a brief glance, Gwaine removed the second boot from his shoulder and squinted up at the balcony behind him. Merlin, catching his meaning, really did drop the boot as he held out a hand. ‘No. No way. Arthur will string both of us up, now that I’ve put that idea in his head, if you do that.’

With a shrug, Gwaine dutifully turned away. ‘I believe it’s your turn.’

Picking up the boot again, the servant adjusted his grip and moved to stand beside Gwaine and flung it towards the throne. His arms, already weary from cleaning at least fifteen boots, didn’t provide enough power and the boot crashed into the polite queue stretching across the floor, scattering them like birds after a stone had been hurled at them. Gwaine suppressed a snort.

‘In my defence, I’m usually the one getting things thrown at me,’ Merlin muttered, approaching the chaos with a small sigh.

Gwaine’s eyebrows drew together. ‘Who throws things at you?’

‘The townspeople when I’m in the stocks. Arthur. The knights, sometimes. Arthur again—’

‘Why does Arthur throw things at you?’

Merlin, his back still to Gwaine as he rummaged through the footwear to find the boot, shrugged. ‘Because he feels like it, I suppose. It’s fine. I’m used to it.’

‘And I thought you said he was different.’

‘He is different,’ Merlin replied, finding the boot and turning around. ‘It’s just that—Gwaine!’

Gwaine was clinging to the central statue,shaft of the boot between his teeth, his legs wrapped seductively around its waist as he tried to hoist himself up. There was a muffled: ‘What?’ and he twisted his head with an attempt at a grin.

‘You’re going to fall off.’

‘M’not.’

Shimmying up the statue, Gwaine reached up for the wrists of the two angels, hauling up his feet from the shoulders of the statue to the sculpted towers above, lurching unsteadily. Merlin desperately wanted to look away, but couldn’t bring himself to alter the direction of his gaze. He felt his eyes slide down Gwaine’s body and rest on his very prominent arse as he squatted momentarily and, catching himself, Merlin pushed his stare to what seemed to be the safe region of Gwaine’s shoulders.

Then Gwaine moved and the muscles in his shoulders bulged beneath his shirt. Merlin could feel the heat rising in his neck. As Gwaine’s foot slipped, Merlin darted towards the statue, hand outstretched to intervene if necessary. Regaining his footing, Gwaine’s hands caught the railings of the balcony and he tumbled over the top, landing with a muffled thump.

‘Arthur is actually going to kill me.’

Leaning over the balcony, Gwaine removed the boot and spat out flakes of mud with a look of disgust. ‘I’ll protect you, Merlin, don’t worry,’ he said, taking a knife from his boot and throwing it in the air with a grin.

It catapulted through the air and embedded itself in the floorboards only inches from Merlin, who had watched its progress with an ever-increasing sense of doom. ‘You saying that fills me with feelings of safety, Gwaine,’ Merlin drily said, folding his arms. ‘There’s no way that you’re going to be able to get that boot to hit the mark.’

‘Not without you up here for moral support.’

Merlin took one look at him, bathed in sunlight, and sighed heavily. Wordlessly, he pushed through one of the doors leading to a narrow staircase – why Gwaine hadn’t elected that route, Merlin was none the wiser – and ascended them two steps at a time, emerging onto the balcony. When Gwaine turned, his head was haloed by the rich woven threads of his hair, face illuminated by his smile. With a wink, he backed up as much as he could, took three decisive strides, and launched the boot over the railings. It curled in on itself as it sliced through the air in a graceful arc, mud spraying the floor like droplets of water from a salmon leaping upstream. It landed in the centre of the throne with a shudder from the sudden breeze it had created.

When Merlin looked towards Gwaine, his eyes travelled down to the exposed skin of his chest as he leaned over the railings and hastily drew his gaze to Gwaine’s smile. ‘See? Having you near me makes all the difference. Now, your turn.’

Merlin raised his eyebrows. ‘If I couldn’t do it down there, what on earth makes you think I could achieve what you just did?’

Levering himself from the railings, Gwaine stood in front of him, hands firmly on his shoulders. ‘Believe in yourself a little, Merlin. Anyway, being higher up actually makes it easier.’

Still unconvinced, Merlin gripped the shaft of the boot a little tighter. He cast one more look at Gwaine to give him the strength to aim as his friend moved away to give him space. Drawing his arm back, Merlin focused his gaze on the stern throne, pictured Arthur’s face when he’d said about there being no downside to Merlin being strung up, and hurled the shoe with all his remaining energy.

It shot through the air, collided with the top of the throne and dropped down on top of Gwaine’s.

In one smooth motion, Gwaine had launched himself at Merlin, hugging him in the same manner he’d embraced the statue. Merlin, thankful that he was steady on his feet for once, laughed into Gwaine’s neck and put one arm beneath his thighs to support him. There was the faintest scent of pickled eggs buried in the depths of Gwaine’s hair but Merlin didn’t mind it as much as he would have thought. There was a murmured phrase of congratulations breathed into the echoing crevice between his neck and neckerchief and both parties were vaguely aware that the appropriate time had elapsed for physical contact, but neither moved to detach themselves.

As Merlin marvelled at how much lighter Gwaine was than he’d expected, Gwaine was busy wondering if it would be possible to push down Merlin’s trousers with his legs and believably claim it was an accident. He wasn’t quite sure what had possessed him to launch himself at Merlin, though perhaps it had been prompted by the smile of disbelief that had spread across his mouth like the dawn when the boot had hit its target. And if this was the first victory that Merlin had secured in a short while, then Gwaine had thought that it deserved to be honoured properly.

Adjusting his grip so his hands fell to Merlin’s shoulders, Gwaine inhaled the delicate aroma of cinnamon that had folded itself in Merlin’s clothes. Perhaps he could be happy here, in Merlin’s arms. If Merlin didn’t get tired of him, that was. Beneath his body, Merlin shifted, other arm skimming Gwaine’s thighs. His head was still turned towards Gwaine’s neck, their cheeks grazing gently against each other, and Gwaine resisted the urge to nip at the skin covering the top of Merlin’s spine. One collision at a time. He was just about to try and push down Merlin’s trousers – because that wasn’t a collision, that was simply testing the waters – when the door below them crashed open and Merlin dropped his arms, startled.

Gwaine’s legs dropped with them and he slipped down, dangling from Merlin’s neck with his feet several inches above the ground. Tentatively, Merlin leaned forward to peer over the balcony and Gwaine swung with him, eyes moving with a growing sense of dread to the disrupted line of boots. Arthur was stood in the centre of the room, arms folded, with a stony expression sketched across his face.

‘One of you had better have a very good explanation for why exactly you are up there.’

Merlin and Gwaine turned to look at each other, and Gwaine’s witty reply was lost along with his breath as he caught sight of subtle flecks of gilt in Merlin’s eyes. As he grasped for words that he no longer had, Merlin twisted his head to look back at Arthur. ‘I was giving Gwaine a tour.’

‘I’ll be giving you both a tour of the stocks if you don’t get down here instantly,’ Arthur threatened.

As Gwaine detached himself from the servant, he let his hand run discreetly across the back of Merlin’s shirt, smirking at the subtle shiver Merlin emitted. Perhaps if he stuck around, then perhaps he could see just where else Merlin could successfully aim.

[abarbaricyalp]

handholding- 10/12/13

hugs - 34

kisses - 7/13/27

touching - 47

sambucky :)

Buddies, I literally cannot believe I managed to get all of these done without being too repetitive.

Handholding 10: Happily doing everything with one hand if that means they don't have to let go is already posted on my blog and on AO3: ElisabethMonroe: (til i carry you home) Your Hand in My Hand

Reblogging with AO3 links in a second

Kisses 27: Desperate Kisses

Inhale My Soul

(Listen, listen y'all, you don't know how many different universes of them dying and bleeding out in each other's arms y'all aren't reading here. I didn't do that to you. You're welcome)

Dissolving hadn’t felt like anything. Sam wasn’t sure he even understood what was actually happening. Maybe he’d thought it was just a trick of the reality stone. Maybe human minds weren’t meant to comprehend anything close to what had happened.

Coming back felt like dying.

He woke up on his back and he couldn’t breathe. It was like he had no lungs at all, just a trachea spasming in his throat without air, like a gills with no water. He grasped for the ground and the feeling of dirt was horrifying, a grave waiting to swallow him down into the Earth. The wind was knives on his skin. His suit felt like it was trying to pry his spine from his ribs. His legs ached like someone was trying to stretch the bones on a crank.

He must’ve screamed but there was no air to make a noise.

Finally sight came back and the first thing he saw were the trees falling over him, ready to crush him and hide him again.

Had anyone seen him disappear? No one was by his side. No one looked for him.

No, the trees weren’t falling. They were swaying in the wind. The sun kept gliding down through them with every shuffle of the leaves.

It was so quiet he felt like he could hear the leaves sighing as they grew.

It took him too long to realize the ragged breath that broke the silence like a gunshot came from his own chest. The hands digging his own grave shot to his chest, felt the rise and fall of his ribs and lungs, the proof that he was breathing. He was alive again.

He rolled onto his side and heaved until his ribs creaked, still firmly attached to his spine. There was nothing to come up, but the noise was comforting, the ache that he could name and handle was safe. Human. Living human.

His knees were in his legs when he leaned back on his haunches. They sank into the earth but the grave didn’t swallow him down. No unwilling sacrifice to be taken from him. He brought his dirt covered fingers--firm and whole and attached to him--up to his face. He found his cheeks, a beard with edges that were too straight for a man who had died and been put back together, his teeth. They throbbed in his gums like they were all about to fall out but they were there in his head. His tongue.

He could speak.

“Steve!” he shouted and his throat screamed in protest, the air in his lungs turned to fire. “Steve!” he called again and forced himself to his feet. His boots were tied. His pants were still tucked into them. There was no blood, which seemed wrong. He felt flayed open and left to soak into the ground. How could there be no blood?

“Steve!”

God, if Steve was dead…

Sam couldn’t lose more people. He couldn’t fight his way back. Not after this. Not while everything hurt so fucking much.

“Steve, please, God, where are you?!”

“Sam?”

Sam whirled around at the tired voice. The trees danced in his vision. The grass clutched at his legs, which still felt like they were being stretched out and sunk into the earth. The trees were going to take him over. The grass was going to eat him again. No one was looking. No one would find him. Why wasn’t anyone ever looking for him?

“Sam?” the voice called again.

Footsteps. Crushing grass. A metal screech in the bark of a tree. A colorful curse. “Sam, fuck, shout again!”

Sam stumbled forward, breaking free of the natural world trying to take him away again. He shoved himself away from a tree and crashed into a warm, solid, human body.

“Jesus, Sam,” Bucky breathed and wrapped his arms around Sam tightly. It hurt in the best way. Sam held him back, face hidden in Bucky’s shoulder. He didn’t even care about what gore he was smearing all over himself. Bucky’s hand came to the back of Sam’s head and Sam almost expected it to hit exposed brain but it didn’t. Instead his calloused fingers brushed over Sam’s short hair, smoothing over the natural lines and divots in it until goosebumps erupted over Sam’s skin.

Right. Things could feel good. That was part of being human and alive.

He had no idea how long they stood there. His shoulders were aching, but in a pleasant way that reminded him that there was something he loved right in front of him, in his arms.

Bucky was the first to move, stepping back half a step, a quarter of a step, barely any at all, just enough to bring his hands up to either side of Sam’s face. The cheeks and the mouth and the skin that was all there and new again. He tilted Sam’s head back, eyes intense and clear in front of Sam.

Had it not felt the same for him? Was he not grappling with his ridiculously weak claim to existence? Or, fuck, was this how he always felt after being frozen and woken up? Had he been going through this for seventy years with no one to run to? With no one to hold him and remind him that things could feel good?

Sam’s fingers tightened in Bucky’s vest and just as Bucky was starting to say something Sam couldn’t honestly answer--something about how he felt, if anything hurt, if he needed medical attention--Sam hauled him down into a desperate kiss. Their noses smashed together and pain bloomed across Sam’s face, made his eyes water, made him want to sneeze, made him want to lean into it all the more, like the pressed-on-bruise ache of Bucky’s arms around him.

He felt Bucky’s teeth notch a split into Sam’s lip by accident, crushed together with nowhere to go. Finally it softened. Bucky’s mouth pressed against his until Sam felt like he could actually breathe, until he could make his mouth do what he wanted, catch Bucky’s lower lip between both of his, wring out a noise he’d never heard the other man make before. Bucky’s hands on his face kept him close and Sam’s fingers tightened in his vest. He wanted to crawl into Bucky’s chest--felt like, maybe, he could after being unmade and remade. Their noses knocked together again as Sam tried to turn his head, kiss the other side of Bucky’s mouth, let Bucky bruise the rest of his lips.

Bucky pulled away, but didn’t let go of Sam’s face. Cool air flowed into Sam’s lungs until all of his bones and muscles felt like they slotted back into place.

“I can’t tell you how fucking happy I am to see you alive,” Bucky breathed.

We should talk about this. That. Later.

“I thought everyone was gone. I don’t know… I didn’t know how I came back. I thought it was just me.”

Bucky shook his head. “No. There’s hundreds of people. Not everyone, but at least half of us.”

Half of them.

“Oh my God,” Sam said. “Thanos won. He wiped out half of the universe.”

“I think that was us. I think...someone brought us back,” Bucky said. Pain flashed over his face as he looked at Sam and then pulled him in for another kiss. Sam tried to understand a second chance in it, but all he could feel was Bucky and relief and adoration. He wasn’t sure where that one came from more--him or Bucky.

“There’s still a fight,” someone said from behind them. Another magic shithead. Terror clutched at Sam’s chest like magic itself was enough to unmake him again, take him away again. “There’s still a world to save.”

Bucky’s hand found Sam’s between their bodies. Sam took a breath with lungs that almost seemed to work again. “What’re we waiting for then?” he asked.

Kiss 13: Frustrated Kiss

Better Than None

“Barnes, you wanna jump in? Any time’s fine,” Sam called out, though the volume wasn’t actually necessary, since he had an earpiece in and Bucky was only a few feet away, leaned on what was left of a building’s wall.

“Nah, you seem to be handling it just fine,” Bucky called back with a nod.

Sam ducked under the robot arm that had been flung at him. “Barnes, I swear, as soon as I get my hands on you--” he threatened.

“Y’know, normally that gets me going but seein’ as you were so anti-giving me a good luck kiss, I don’t know if I believe you anymore.”

“We don’t have time for this!” Sam threw the shield to cut through seven wire-y necks and caught it at degree 355 of its arc.

“It’s just a kiss. Takes two/tenths of a second,” Bucky said.

“I meant this dumbass argument.” Sam jumped out of the way of an electrical charge and Bucky watched it sail dangerously close to his head.

“Damn, maybe I am lucky without you,” he said and didn’t move at all.

“Bucky,” Sam sighed and ripped the head off of the nearest robot.

“Hot. Wish I could show you my appreciation.”

“How does me not giving you a good luck kiss translate you into not giving me any kisses?”

“It only seems fair. You’re putting my well-being at risk. There should be consequences.”

“That’s not how it works! You’re the one not--” Jesus, he didn’t have time to fall for the bait. He freed a mini-EMP from his utility belt and hurled it at the cluster of robots trying to scale the debris that first responders were using as a barricade to the rest of the street. A few seconds later, the robots fell away, powerless and useless.

“I kind of felt that in my arm,” Bucky said.

Sam growled out a huff and stalked over to Bucky. He shoved the front of the shield against his chest a little roughly and leaned in to kiss him, mostly teeth and irritation. The bastard still looked pleased when Sam pulled away.

“Good luck. Now will you please go do your job?��

Bucky grinned, all teeth and victory, and bolted into action.

Kisses 7: Passionate Kiss

Hand holding 13: Linking hands during s**

Bring Heaven to You

Sam swore he could feel Bucky’s mouth all over him. Every inch of his skin felt electric and alive. Frankenstein’s creature surging to life after a bolt of lightning, every nerve and muscle singing at the same time, overwhelming sensation in the best way. Like a freefall that keep him tethered to the mismatched hands clutching at his hips, his ribs, his chest, his shoulders, his thighs, the backs of his knees. Like Bucky couldn’t decide where he should be shocking Sam back to life either.

Bucky dragged his hand down Sam’s side, flat and steady so Sam could feel the golden band on his finger scorching his skin like it was made of fire. Like vows and rings and heavy promises weren’t enough to prove they belonged to each other, like they needed it written in flesh and blood like everything else about their lives.

Hahahaha, no. The rest is on AO3. Link in the reblog

Hand holding 12: Possessive hand holding

A Green Monster, And No We Don’t Mean The Hulk

“Welcome back to the show, Captain America!” a bubbly, young talk show host greeted. Bucky assumed he’d watched at least a few seconds of the program at some point when he was making it his life mission not to leave his apartment, but he couldn’t place her name for the life of him. “And you brought Mr. Barnes with you!” This she said with much less genuine enthusiasm and didn’t seem all that thrilled to have to look away from Sam to address Bucky.

“Well, you know I can’t stay away too long,” Sam said with a friendly smile. He held out his hand and the host took it in both of hers. It was less a hand shake and more an excuse for her to hang onto Sam, it looked like.

Sam and Bucky sat in the cushy seats for guests and, even though they’d already walked through the staging of this whole farce, Bucky was still deeply tempted to take Sam’s seat so he was between Sam and the host.

“So, Sam, last time we saw each other, you weren’t yet Captain America.”

“Funny how fast things like that can change, right?” Sam asked with twinkling eyes. Bucky wondered if the cameras were bolted down and if he could wrench one free even if they were.

“Well, I think it’s still not soon enough,” the host said and tossed her long hair over her shoulder. “You’ve always been Cap to us here. You’ve been so vocal about your mission statement as Captain America, so I won’t make you repeat yourself.” Sam nodded gratefully, though Bucky knew he’d repeat his goals and wishes until he ran out of breath if it meant one more person heard them and got inspired. “So I thought we could focus on what’s going on behind the scenes with you. Has anything else changed for you since you’ve been back?”

As if coming back to life wasn’t enough.

“Oh, definitely,” Sam said. “Buck and I just finished flipping a house down by my sister. Y’know, we got decent temporary accommodations--Buck still has his in New York--and staying with my sister again was nice, but there’s nothing like having a house to come home to that’s just ours. No pre-teens stealing all the food outta the fridge immediately after grocery shopping.”

The host laughed along with Sam, though her eyes couldn’t quite keep from flickering to Bucky. “It’s fun that you’re rooming with Mr. Barnes. Does it feel like having college roommates again?”

Sam frowned, opened his mouth to answer, ran through a bunch of diplomatic ways to say what should’ve been obvious but wasn’t because this lady was into Sam. Which, like, Bucky couldn’t blame her for. But he was anyway.

He reached over to grab Sam’s hand where it was picking at a loose thread in his pants. “Actually, it’s more like just living with a partner,” he answered for Sam. “That’s something else that’s changed too, huh?” he directed at Sam. “Turns out, with consistent showers and therapy, he thinks I’m pretty charming.”

Sam frowned again and scoffed. “No, I do not. That hasn’t changed.”

The host laughed again, forced but a decent show anyway. “Sure, we all love a good bromance,” she said.

Bucky’s eyebrows shot up.

“Don’t,” Sam warned.

“It’s a lot like a bromance, yeah. Just without the B,” Bucky said. “We kind of figured my name had enough Bs to last us for a while.”

“Sam, are you saying--”

Sam sighed and brought his other hand up to the bridge of his nose. “Unfortunately. And, yeah, he’s always like this. Some kinda puffed up bulldog or something.”

Bucky’s fingers tightened around Sam’s. “You’re my partner. I’m allowed to tell people that.”

“You don’t ever stop telling people.”

“Can’t blame him,” the host pointed out. Okay, maybe some of the hostility was misplaced, Bucky thought. Only some of it. “How did we not know about this, Cap?” she asked jovially, though Bucky thought she was still a little upset.

Sam shrugged. “Guess it’s not as exciting as superheroing. And cameras keep ending up destroyed,” he added pointedly.

Bucky narrowed his eyes at the accusation. “Half the places we go could be classified as an active war zone. It’s not always on me that media cameras get crushed under debris or aliens or something.”

“Every single one that catches you touching my face?”

Bucky shrugged.

“So...how long has this been a thing?” the host asked.

“Since before Sam took the shield. It’s actually a package deal. If you want the shield, you have to have me.”

Sam rolled his eyes and let out another long suffering sigh. “I’m sorry he’s ruining this interview.”

“Oh, no, I’m about to win an investigative journalism prize, I think,” the host laughed.

“I don’t know how investigative it is when your subject is physically incapable of shutting up,” Sam said, looking over at Bucky with a glare and the smallest pout that made Bucky want to kiss it off of his face.

So he did, holding their interlaced fingers next to their face to hide from the cameras at least a little bit.

Hugging 34: Hugging while grabbing butt

Get Sprung

(Man, I meant to put this in the fr@ story and forgot :/ )

The building came down faster than Sam expected it to. He supposed well placed explosives would do that. What happened to uncertain, uneven dynamite? Why was everything electrical and precise nowadays?

He had no idea how Bucky managed to get Sam and the shield bundled in his arms before the ceiling came down. He didn’t know how Bucky had managed to kick a piece of wall upright and then locked his metal arm to hold the shield in place above them. He had no idea how Bucky knew it’d make the perfect alcove for them. For someone who pretended not to know what math was when AJ asked for help on homework, he was very calculation savvy.

Bucky slowly freed his arm from the straps of the shield. The rubble shifted a little, pressed a little closer, and then stilled again. They both let out a small breath. There wasn’t enough room to lay out totally, or to stand fully, but they weren’t being crushed. Bucky’s arm joined the other around Sam’s waist. Sam dropped his face to Bucky’s shoulder and let Bucky’s pulse drum against his cheek for a second.

“Are you grabbing my ass?” he finally asked and Bucky coughed out a startled laugh.

“Yeah, you better hope it’s me and not some darkness monster.”

“Couldn’t blame the monster if it was,” Sam said.

“I gotta make sure it’s still there. Would be a shame to lose America’s ass, y’know.”

Sam shook his head and pulled away from Bucky enough to light up his wristlets. He shook them off and rested them on pieces of concrete and rebar to light the space.

Bucky sank down to the ground, legs bent a little to accommodate the space and Sam followed him down, settling between his legs.

“So, now we wait, huh?” he said, reaching for Bucky’s hands to tangle their fingers together.

“Guess we gotta,” Bucky agreed. “Are you hurt?”

Sam shook his head. There was still a ringing in his ears from the explosion and he was sore from Bucky tackling him out of the way, but nothing felt crushed or cut or broken. “You?”

“I’m fine,” Bucky said and then let out a breath at Sam’s arched brow. “I mean it. I’m not playing tough or anything. We got lucky. It came down on us, not sideways into us. I think there’s something lodged between the plates in my arm, but I don’t want you to do anything about it until we’re safe. It’s functional right now. I don’t need to be down an arm if we have to dig out.”

“We’re not gonna have to dig out,” Sam said. “Torres’ll track Redwing to us.”

“How’s your dumb robot?”

Sam reached for a wristlet and navigated to the Redwing menu. “Operational. Some exterior dinging, but nothing serious. He’ll be functional if we need.” Sam set the wristlet aside again and sighed. “Fuck, that was close, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah. C’mere,” Bucky said, opening his arms. Sam shifted forward on his knees and leaned against Bucky’s chest, hugging him close. “‘M glad you’re okay,” Bucky murmured, lips brushing Sam’s temple.

Sam nodded and rubbed Bucky’s waist for a second. “Buck?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re grabbing my ass again.”

“I know.”

“Alright.”

Touch 47: Touching their elbow to get their attention

Quiet Birds Circling in Flight

(Jeez, the only thing that came to mind for ages on this prompt involved a spaceship but these men have SEEN aliens and spaceships so that’s not as fun :(((((( )

Sam stood outside the cenotaph long after everyone else had left the service. And that was quite the feat in and of itself. It felt like the mourning could go on for years. There’d been enough tears around him that he wasn’t sure what his own would add to the spectacle.

To everyone else, the cenotaph was a mausoleum. But Sam had been next to Bucky when he told the military to quietly bury him in the cemetery where his parents were both buried. “You know,” Bucky had said one afternoon while they watched the cenotaph being built stone by stone, engraving by engraving, “I’d wager that most mausoleums are just cenotaphs. Grave robbing and reactions to grave robbing mean probably everyone just got moved somewhere safer.”

“Plus decomposition.”

“Well, shit, Wilson. When do you stop being you after death? When does dirt become dirt again? When isn’t it your resting place? Does it even matter where your body is when alls said and done? Is that ever actually you or just a space filler?”

Sam had elbowed Bucky’s ribs and they’d each taken a piece of stone and pretended they didn’t see.

Sam weighed the shield against his shin, knocking it slightly to the side, and then looked up at the stone one ten more feet above his head.

Steve would hate this so much. Sam felt like he could feel his raging blush from the after life. Sam and Bucky had both asked for something more muted, something quieter. Hell, something that would do good for the world Steve was always trying to save. All this money and work and art, for what? A place to take pictures for likes on the internet?

No, Sam had to remind himself, it was a place for memory too.

As much as Sam kind of hated the whole thing, he couldn’t deny that looking up at the effigy of his friend inspired him the same way glancing over at him had in life too. The words wrapping around and around the base of the cenotaph sparked the same intense pride and righteousness they had the first time he heard them.

Maybe he didn’t hate the cenotaph. Maybe he just wanted the real thing back.

He startled at a gentle touch at his elbow. He thought it might’ve been another mourner come to offer condolences, though those mostly went to Bucky when someone was brave enough to approach him. Most people hadn’t looked at Sam twice. Not when Captain America was, in theory, laying in rest thirty feet beyond.

Sam was not in the mood to listen to anyone else talk about the time Steve smiled at them in a cafe or grabbed their cat out of a tree. If he heard his name again, he was going to break down.

But he had the shield now. He had to do the things Steve did. Smile when he didn’t want to. Hide any sign of weakness, lest it reflect poorly on the red, white, and blue he carried now. So he ground his teeth together until his gums ached and turned with a screwed on smile.

But it wasn’t a mourner. Not a random one anyway.

Bucky still had his fingers on Sam’s elbow, a sad look on his face. Dawn was creeping over the horizon and Sam realized with a start and a bloom of despair in his stomach that he’d spent the entire night in the park.

“Think if we wait two more days he’ll shove that stupid stone shield out of the way and come out?” Sam asked, voice wavering like a flag in the wind.

“We would literally never hear the end of it if he did,” Bucky pointed out.

Neither of them smiled. Neither of them really meant their jokes.

Sam finally broke down.

He collapsed against Bucky’s chest. It wasn’t until he lost his breath in the middle of a sob that he realized he wasn’t the only one shaking. Bucky was crying too. They clutched at each other, both terrified they might drift away, that the other might decide this was too difficult too and go back to something better at the first opportunity.

Sam didn’t even blame Steve. He’d laid awake in the temporary accommodation the government had put him up in and tried to convince himself that if he was in Steve’s shoes, he wouldn’t have saved Riley and stayed in that timeline. But he couldn’t. He knew he would have, almost certainly. And it wasn’t fair to ask Steve to give up a happy, quiet ending after more than a century of fighting and hurting.

But understanding it and accepting it didn’t make it hurt any less. “What are we supposed to do, Bucky?” he asked with an irritatingly genuine hiccup at the end of his words.

“I don’t know,” Bucky said, sounding for all the world like he was grinding his teeth together, trying to pull himself back together. “You have a lot more options than me.”

And it was true. Sam had had a job. The Air Force had reached out since he’d been back stateside. He had a family who missed him, who he missed. But it felt like something heavy and tethering had been locked away in that empty cenotaph. He didn’t want to walk away yet.

Bucky stepped back, kept a hand on Sam’s elbow. “For now, we should get back home. You need to sleep.”

Sam didn’t want to sleep. Everything hurt too much.

“Sam, come on,” Bucky insisted. “You don’t have to make any decisions right now.We could both use a few hours of being quiet, right?

Sam reached up to wipe the tears from his face. He had the shield. He had to act like it. “My place or yours?” he asked, still watery.

Bucky pretended like he didn’t notice. “Yours is nicer than mine.”

“And I have a bed.”

“I have a bed.”

“It’s unassembled in a box.”

Bucky squeezed his elbow and then tugged him into a brief hug that Sam was pretty sure they’d never speak of again. “Let’s get out of here. He’s not goin’ nowhere.”

Sam rubbed at his face again and nodded. “We-- We should order in. When’s the last time you ate?” he asked as they walked away.

“I had a better breakfast than you.”

“You didn’t have to give a speech.”

“Yeah, I’m surprised you didn’t throw up in front of everyone.”

“Shut up, I’m a great public speaker.”

“Sure, Wilson.”

“Screw you, Barnes.”

The dawn bloomed before them.

Do not stand

By my grave, and weep.

I am not there,

I do not sleep—

I am the thousand winds that blow

I am the diamond glints in snow

I am the sunlight on ripened grain,

I am the gentle, autumn rain.

As you awake with morning’s hush,

I am the swift, up-flinging rush

Of quiet birds in circling flight,

I am the day transcending night.

Do not stand

By my grave, and cry—

I am not there,

I did not die.

[traditional-with-a-twist]

xxxii. Beauty and Her Beast

@claudeng80 ha ha ‘a title has not helped Obi express himself better’ - truer words never spoken XD Ryuu just processes too slowly to keep up with things, and you’re so right, everyone is still shell-shocked and twisted around!

@bubblesthemonsterartist awwww, yeah, probably safe to say that Obi and Shirayuki are not doing great at seeing the bigger picture here XD I’m a little chagrined, putting them through these situations that push them so far outside their healthy canon!

@the-pompous-potato hahaha thank you for accepting my slightly contrived criteria for the wedding ceremony XD wish I were one of those authors who meticulously researches culture/history but ANS is such a mishmash! You are too sweet about the writing and feels and everything; makes me so happy to know that you’re enjoying it! <3

<<Previous || first arc || second arc || AO3

The first prince entertained very few visitors in the wake of the intensive administrative outpouring surrounding his public address.

There was too much to do, to rebalance the scales and irrigate the neglected areas of his responsibilities.

After revolving on its hinges in the days leading up to the grand announcement, Izana’s door presented now an unyielding front to almost all callers.

When Kiki Seiran presented herself, however, the guards admitted her at once.

...

She found the prince deep in thought, chin resting on a long-fingered hand. 

Only his eyelids flickered in acknowledgement of her entrance. He knew without asking what she had come to deliver to him.

She laid the report on his desk: her official account of their journey north. 

As she backed away, Kiki inclined her head in deference to his position and to the gravity of the task. He had entrusted her with a deep and dangerous secret, and she knew it wouldn’t be the last time.

He regarded her with that slight smile that was more forbidding than another man’s frown. “Your service will not be forgotten, Kiki Seiran.”

It is a compliment, but also a promise.

...

As she turns to go, her eye catches on a pair of figures, plainly visible in the courtyard below through the prince’s sweeping glass doors.

The woman’s hair flames, while the man’s swallows the light. They linger together before parting.

He slides in the direction of the pharmacy; she starts towards the castle.

...

Kiki’s eyes dart towards the prince, but he is watching her, still with that same slight smile.

Izana is enigmatic as a mirrored window. He let you paint your thoughts onto his facade, inviting any interpretation, any fear, no matter how wild. 

All the while, he revealed nothing of himself.

...

Kiki bows herself out.

She knows without knowing how that Shirayuki wants to speak with her, so she goes to make herself available - to intercept the intended second princess before anyone else in the castle does.

Calculating without conscious effort a range of factors from the relative privacy that they might expect, to the likelihood that Shirayuki will seek her there, Kiki positions herself in an alcove with a view of the forest.

...

As she gazes on the waving branches, Kiki thinks of nothing in particular, content to wait, and see.

It is as if her body remembers for her: riding horseback, side by side, perfectly in synch.

She had known the day she met Mitsuhide that he was the man with whom she wished to spend her life. 

Subsequent exposure had served only to confirm, as snarls arose and pulled smooth in a spiral of increasing intimacy.

...

His awkwardness, his uncertainty around her, had gradually transformed from cause for misgivings into evidence in his favor.

She had weighed and measured each of his qualities, each exchange that passed between them, and found him worthy.

She no longer wondered who would preside alongside her at Seiran manor, whose crest would join hers over the fireplace in the great hall, whose name she would carve into the seal of the wooden chest delivered on her birth.

Now she doesn’t even know where he is.

...

Still that wooden chest waited.

As she grew, she had added to its contents: laboriously contrived needlework, then finer things, and more recently the delicately crafted weapons that one might slip under an embroidered sleeve or wear along with layered skirts.

The chest had accompanied Kiki to the palace alongside trunks of finery which she had made use of perhaps twice since arriving: once at the ball where she met Mitsuhide and once to play charades with Zen in the garden.

Shirayuki is smaller than I am, Kiki thought, but some of the simpler shifts might suit her. She could wear one intended for garden parties, sewn at tea-length, without having to pin up the hem.

Such a dress would easily stretch to cover Shirayuki’s ankles and render her acceptable according to the unwritten yet ironclad rules of the game that Shirayuki had decided to play.

...

Kiki had feared for her less when Shirayuki had engaged to play with Zen as her partner.

He wasn’t - hadn’t been - all wise, or impervious to attack, but he was native to it. He was also by nature brave and generous, and that, combined with his own peculiar insights into the hearts of others, meant that he had known when to bow before the rules and when to break them.

Kki had believed they would find a way together, and she had been proud to walk beside them.

...

Now she felt no such assurance.

She wouldn’t say that Shirayuki and Obi were like the blind leading the blind - despite their carelessness and outright willfulness at times, she knew them better than that.

It was more that neither spoke the language of the court from birth - and on whom could they reply to interpret?

Instead of a loving prince, they now relied for patronage on Lord Haruka, a reluctant and embittered enemy, who would have gladly seen them both vanish off the face of the earth had his duty not impelled him otherwise.

...

Kiki shook her head.

She didn’t like it any more than she had before the announcement, news which she had greeted with the grim resignation of one accustomed to witnessing births, marriages, and deaths all managed like pieces on a chessboard, as it suited the political purposes of those in power.

Shirayuki and Obi might have convinced themselves that the game was over, but Kiki knew that it had just begun.

...

...

Shirayuki saw with relief that Kiki didn’t look busy - she was only standing by a window, as if lost in thought.

She approached the other woman shyly, still more relieved when Kiki greeted her with the customary quiet smile.

Friendship was a strange thing: Shirayuki would have trusted Kiki with her life, as she had while sailing on a ship with an evil captain into unknown waters -- but now she felt nervous.

She had never asked Kiki for a favor before.

...

Shirayuki joined Kiki at the window. The thought crossed her mind that her friend looked sad, even as Shirayuki was preoccupied with churning doubts over how to broach such a sensitive subject.

“I,” she faltered, blushing. “I’ve heard that--at least, here in Clarines--”

“I have a dress that will fit you,” Kiki answered, in unhesitating agreement with the question that had yet to be asked. “You won’t need much more than that.”

“Oh,” Shirayuki squeaked. “Really?”

...

“It will be a small ceremony, and you can keep your underclothes.” Kiki paused. “Unless you want silk stockings.”

“What? No, no!” Shirayuki waved her hands, her face flaming. “That’s not--I don’t need…” She stopped when she saw a twinkle in Kiki’s eye.

Shirayuki smiled back weakly. “Thank you. That’s very kind. Very, very kind!”

...

“This way.” Kiki was already in motion. “You can have it from my chambers now.”

“From…?” Shirayuki stumbled to keep up. 

An uneasy thought struck her. “Kiki...is it...your dress?”

“Tell me if it’s too long, and we’ll find a tailor.”

...

“But!” Dismayed, Shirayuki caught at her sleeve.

Kiki looked over her shoulder, her expression gentle. “Don’t worry, Shirayuki…

“...I won’t be needing it.”