#I swear to you I’m not even kidding we don’t have gay bars

[transssexualheart]

Does anyone happen to know of any good trans friendly doctors in Vermont ? I need a new primary and a gyno mostly and I just don’t feel comfortable with the office I’ve been going to anymore, especially now that I’m old enough to kind of need the gynecology aspect of it. Also if you live in Vermont can we kiss…. Lol jk. I know nobody even knows what Vermont is.

[daysofourlivesrecaps]

Wednesday, 26 July 2023

We’re on day 7,641 of “Nicole is pregnant, EJ is happy, Eric is relatively fine with it and Sloan is pregnant now too.”

Nothing new happens in this storyline. Nothing new will ever happen in this storyline. Nicole has been pregnant since the Big Bang and will remain pregnant until the heat death of the universe.

Sloan, by contrast, is absolutely no more than 30 days pregnant. And look, I’m a cis dude and I don’t know shit about anything. But even I know you don’t tell anyone you’re pregnant this early. 

She’s just that interested in sticking it to Nicole, I guess.

But the joke’s (potentially) on Sloan as she discovers that DNA test the doctor ordered on EJ. Maybe something will finally happen!

But it won’t be happening today, that’s for damn sure. 

Meanwhile, Chad and Stephanie are about to have some offscreen shower sex.

And if you ever wanted actual supporting evidence of my whole “Salem property values are extremely low” argument, it’s this: people are constantly having shower sex on this show. You ever try that with a regular-sized shower? It’s nigh impossible. The only explanation is that everyone has those enormous two-head showers. Which they can afford because their homes were so cheap.

Naturally they’re interrupted by Alex, sans shirt, once again.

Sure, we just had that big talk about boundaries the other day, but all he wants is help picking out a shirt for his date!

Which Chad does, and then promptly slams the door in his face.

At the Salem Inn, Gwen and Dimitri remind us that they’re getting married on Friday (!!).

Gwen suggests some sex (probably in the shower), but Dimitri balks!

And then reminds us of the whole “he’s fucking Leo” thing.

Which I was certain was just a tactic to get Leo to stop trying to ruin the wedding but apparently he was serious about being a closeted gay dude (which I believe) and being seriously into Leo (which makes absolutely no sense to me whatsoever.)

Gwen is understandably disappointed.

Dimitri leaves to run some errands, so Gwen confides in Leo. Who completely fails to come clean with her about the whole “I’m fucking Dimitri” thing.

And instead blows a bunch of smoke. Which is not what Leo usually blows!

Get it? That was a dick joke. And Leo is being a real dick about all of this.

Dimitri’s errand takes him to Chad and Stephanie’s, where he invites the two of them to the wedding.

Chad reminds him, in one of the most legitimately glorious speeches anyone has ever given on this show, that he (Dimitri) very recently held a gun to Kate (who is basically Chad’s mom)’s head. And that Gwen allegedly* terrorized his dead wife Abigail when she was alive.

Then Chad slams the door in Dimitri’s face and returns to his offscreen shower sex.

And at Small Bar (no, really — the small bar is called Small Bar), Trask realizes her date is not Li again, as she feared at the end of yesterday’s episode… but Alex!!

I was so excited about this! They’re both of pretty comparable hotness. And Alex hasn’t been here long enough to have done a bunch of crimes that Trask would hate him for. Hitching her star to his usually shirtless wagon would be an excellent way out of Supporting Character Purgatory!

Unfortunately, Alex screws up the date by talking too much.

And as an ADHD kid who always talks longer than he probably should, I felt bad for the guy. Until Trask called him out for constantly putting his glasses on and taking them off again. Which, I swear to christ, is a thing we’ve noticed since Alex showed up a year ago and we delight in pointing out every time he does it.

Man, I love it when they get meta.

Li’s date ends up being this lady.

And I think the joke is supposed to be that he got a dud too, but first of all, she’s fucking hot. Second, she’s kind of a freak (she wanted to date him because she thought he actually was involved in that murder plot). Third, in her ten minutes of screen time she turned out to be a better actor than Li has been in over a year. And fourth — look at her. She’s fucking hot.

Regardless, Li dumps her (ugh) and somehow he and Trask end up having another drink together (uggggggh).

And Alex runs into Chad and Stephanie, on their way out to the pub.

AND THEN CHAD INVITES HIM ALONG.

Look, I always thought my “these three should just all hook up in a polyamorous thruple situation” thing was a long shot but… maybe it’s actually happening after all??

* Gwen has never done anything wrong in her life.

[tobheath]

matthewcdaddario​:

“No you cannot! Seriously? I swear on my last breath I will find something I am better at than you and then proceed to do it very loudly and proudly in front of you.” He teased, shaking his head. They were almost to the first club and Matt’s cool resolve was slowly giving way to anxiety. He felt his palms getting clammy and had he been standing, his knees would have no doubt began to buckle. It was one thing to confess to your best friend that you’re bisexual but then to go to a bar, where the mere thought of someone looking at him with knowing eyes, sent a chill up his spine. He wasn’t ashamed of being bisexual, he had accepted that part, but the horror stories about being outed before you were ready, the stigma surrounded gays in Hollywood, he didn’t just want to be another statistic. Another scapegoat for the gossip blogs and magazines that loved to run that kind of story, to twist the narrative until its revealed he dated, or had crushes, on every male friend or coworker in his life despite there being any truth to it. No, Matt wasn’t ready for the world to know. He knew that Tobin would take this secret to the grave with her but he worried that now that it was out in the open with her, how many other people would notice? “You, Christen, and my sister are the only people who know. I haven’t even come out to my parents yet. They think my divorce was a result of our inability to agree on kids, which I mean that was part of what caused the rift between us, but my nearly cheating on her with a mutual male friend is what pushed us over the edge. I don’t know if she knew or suspected but I never told her myself until after the whole incident. That’s when we decided that our marriage wasn’t working. She didn’t want to stand in the way of my being happy and I wasn’t happy with her anymore.”

She grinned, hands lifting in mock arrest. “I told you I was a woman of many talents, did I not?” With a warm laugh, she leaned over and clapped a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t worry, Matty. I’m looking forward to the day when you show me up. Even planning to commemorate it with a national holiday.” Tobin didn’t know what it was like to end a marriage, but she knew what it was like to upend your life. She squeezed his hand again as a small reassurance, the red glare from the taillights in front of them illuminating the inside of the car. “Not that I condone the almost cheating thing, but it’s a big deal, choosing your happiness over what’s familiar and safe. And you don’t owe your parents, or anybody for that matter, an explanation about why things ended or why your life looks how it does now that you’re past that relationship and moving on.” She shrugged. “People speculated about my sexuality for years long before I even knew those corners of the Internet existed, and I thought admitting it publicly was just going to give them their told you so. But I could’ve sat around defending the choices I made or I could just... not, and keep living my life how I wanted. Do what made me happy. So you don’t have to explain anything, to me or to your family or anybody. This is the part where you just... get to be happy. However that looks for you. Even if it is scary as shit.” Tobin offered him a small smile. “And I’m happy for ‘ya.” 

[ktmarison]

SOUTH  PARK:  POST  COVID  SENTENCE  STARTERS.

"  i'm  not  getting  drunk,  i'm  an  online  whiskey  consultant.  i'm  doing  research.  "

"  we  were  friends  when  we  were  kids.  "

"  how  does  it  feel  to  be  back  after  all  these  years  ?  "

"  i'm  just  here  for  the  funeral.  "

"  maybe  we  can  call  jesus  and  santa  and  ask  them  for  help.  is  that  what  you  want  ?  "

"  obviously  we're  never  gonna  agree  on  certain  things,  so  we  shouldn't  talk  about  them.  "

"  i  have  a  lot  of  anxiety  being  back  with  all  these  people.  "

"  he's  fucking  with  me.  "

"  guys,  please,  this  is  a  house  of  god.  "

"  no  jewish  people  have  sex  screaming  about  their  love  of  abraham  !  "

"  goddamn  it,  why  don't  you  lay  off  my  fuckin'  dad  ?  "

"  you  want  to  maybe  do  a  little  bump  ?  "

"  my  body  is  a  temple  and  i'm  not  taking  that  shit  !  "

"  i've  been  trying  not  to  say  anything,  but  your  friends  are  all  kinda  douche  bags.  "

"  all  we  have  to  do  is  show  [name]  that  we  have  proof  and  they'll  do  whatever  we  want  !  "

"  we'll  see  you  in  a  couple  of  weeks.  "

"  i'm  just  getting  sick  of  being  here  every  day  with  you,  that's  all  !  "

"  let's  just  face  it,  you  guys:  we  don't  trust  each  other,  and  we  don't  like  each  other  !  "

"  don't  you  understand  ?  this  could  change  the  world  !  "

"  what's  the  biggest  difference  between  a  christian  man  and  a  lesbian  ?  "

"  do  you  ever  think  about  how  the  way  you  act  affects  other  people  ?  "

"  you're  a  fucking  alcoholic  piece  of  shit  !  "

"  as  a  fellow  person  of  faith,  i'm  begging  you  to  help  us.  "

"  we  all  wanna  be  happy,  right  ?  we  all  want  our  little  piece  of  the  apple  pie  !  "

"  i  think  (name)  was  a  twerpy  little  loser  kid  whose  parents  didn't  love  him.  "

"  do  you  understand  the  butterfly  effect  ?  how  one  small  thing  in  time  can  affect  the  entire  future  ?  "

"  trust  me,  another  30  seconds  in  that  room  and  you  would  have  started  considering  NFTs  as  a  viable  investment.  "

"  (name),  goddamn  it,  you  have  done  this  your  whole  goddamn  life.  "

"  the  future  fucking  sucks.  "

"  even  i  have  to  remind  myself  to  stay  positive.  "

"  i  swear  to  god  if  you  don't  help  me,  i  will  rip  your  fucking  balls  off  with  my  bare  hands.  "

"  let's  face  it,  dude.  it's  over.  the  fucking  future  won.  "

"  you  fucking  stop  !  you  stop  being  a  fucking  monster  to  the  people  around  you  !  "

“  all  you  fucking  do  is  hurt  people  !  ”

"  that  just  seems  slightly  hypocritical,  i'm  sorry.  "

"  we  must  be  willing  to  use  violence  against  violence.  "

“  oh,  fuck  me.  ”

"  jesus,  i  feel  like  an  islamic  hooker  in  a  gay  bar.  "

"  you  can't  go  back  and  change  the  past.  what  happened,  happened.  and  i  just  want  you  to  know  that  i  forgive  you.  "

"  no,  you're  what  killed  our  fucking  family,  remember  ?  "

"  this  isn't  you,  my  love.  "

"  i  can't  lose  you.  "

"  i  have  faith  that  god  will  see  my  family  through  this.  "

"  you're  trying  to  trick  me.  "

"  this  present  is  for  you.  because  i  love  you.  "

"  you're  not  sorry.  you're  just  high.  "

"  we  were  just  going  a  little  bonkers  there.  "

"  for  some  reason  i'm  just  extra  happy  to  see  you  guys.  "

"  what  is  up  with  these  bisexual  canadians,  huh  ?  i  guess  they  don't  know  whether  to  fuck  their  brother  or  their  sister.  "

"  fuck  you  guys  !  you  can  suck  my  fucking  dick  !  "

"  weed  can't  solve  all  your  problems.  "

[everywishway]

Genshin University AU Part 2

Part 2 of this College AU because I have more ideas. Just what their life is like and if people want more specific headcanons/one-shots/other characters, ask box is open :)

Characters in Part 1: Childe, Zhongli, Diluc, Kaeya, and Albedo

Characters in Part 2: Lumine, Aether, Venti, Xiao and Thoma

Part One Link:

Lumine:

Freshman, undecided (took a gap year with her twin)

Panromantic, Demisexual, Polyam, Demigirl

Every branch of the LGBTree

Member of the Fencing Team with Kaeya and Childe, fucking amazing at it.

Lives on campus in the "Mondstadt District", not far from Kaeya and Diluc's apartment

Recently got into a fight with her twin, who just so happens to be going to the same school

Has no sense of direction so she often gets lost

Works with Kaeya and Diluc at the bar

She's really sweet but also hot-headed, teases Childe a lot

Knows Zhongli through Childe, he helps tutor them

Also streams, really good at video games and used to play them with Aether

Aether:

ls also an undecided Freshman who took a gap year

Trans, Polyam, and Bisexual

On Track with Diluc but does the running, not throwing

Lives in the 'Liyue District' but quite a bit of distance from Childe's apartment

Expresses himself through clothing, both masculine and feminine

He doesn't speak much, so is really shy

He does play a lot of video games though, used to hop on Lunine's streams and play occasionally

He likes calming games like Animal Crossing or Pokemon

As I said, got into an argument with Lumine and has avoided her since

He has seen her multiple times but he always walks away before she sees him

Venti:

Same age as Zhongli and went to the same school as him

Music major

Often performs at Diluc and Kaeya’s bar

Blows half the money he makes on drinks so they don’t mind too much

Has a large pallet when it comes to music, his Spotify Wrapped is all over the place

One day it’s old classical, the next it’s Penelope Scott then it's sea shanties

One of those guys who somehow is in your apartment, even if he doesn’t have a key

He does bring ice cream and sweets tho so that’s a good thing

One of those friends who drags you out to have fun, especially when your sad and need to get out of the house

"Come on! I know this great band who I know you'll love!"

Loves feminine clothing and makeup, finds it fun to wear

Has a giant dog that he can practically ride, named Dvalin

He seems aggressive but he’s harmless and a huge baby who wants cuddles

I think Dvalin would be an Alaskan Malamute, Husky mix

Dyes Dvalin blue occasionally

"Look Dvalin! Now we match!"

Xiao:

As I stated in part one, he’s Zhongli’s cousin

A Freshman who plans on being a Philosophy major

Does martial arts and yoga in his spare time

One to punch his frustrations out, then one to relax

Actually went to the yoga studio so much he became an instructor

Best friends with Ganyu but doesn’t show it, thinks it makes him weak

Listens to old school emo music like MCR, Set it Off, etc

Gay and Trans bc I said so

Skateboards everywhere and that's his aesthetic

Honestly hates Childe for always being his apartment, finds him arrogant and immature (also doesn’t like the fact he flirts with Zhongli)

Childe thinks he’s cute but thinks Xiao needs to learn to be a kid and enjoy life

"I swear to Archons, Childe. If you don't stop singing Skater Boi I will kill you myself"

Thoma:

Sophomore who just moved back to the ‘Mondstadt District’ from Inazuma

Elementary Education Major, he is so good with kids

Actually a teacher’s aid to Klee’s class

Has a minor in Women's Studies bc this boy chugs his respect women juice

Golden Retriever boi who works at your local boba shop

Often gets mistaken for Childe

He’s never actually met him but would love to since everyone seems to know him

He reminds me of my favorite small streamer so I’m saying he’s a streamer too

Only streams ‘Just Chatting’ streams or wholesome games like Stardew Valley

His chat does love to make fun of his innocent persona

"Aww, cute puppy. Sure chat I'll pet- AHH, WHY IS IT ATTACKING ME"

Rooms with Ayaka who transferred here to hang out with her brother (who is a professor, idk of what)

Really helpful! Always doing chores to help around the house or you are understaffed at work

[bellakitse]

Nothing ever stays the same

Farmer's Market redux.

A few days after running into his parents at the farmer's market, Carlos and TK run into them again. This time Carlos tells them who TK really is to him.

Spoilers for 2.04

They give the farmer’s market another try. TK suggests it since they didn’t get a chance to explore all of it the last time. Carlos agrees, even though he’s a little tentative about it.

TK swears up and down they’re okay and spends the rest of the week at his place. Carlos thinks it’s both to reassure him they’re fine and because Owen and Gwyneth are acting weirder than ever around everyone.

“They’re both jumpy as hell and secretive,” TK mentions as they walk around the market hand in hand, stopping here and there at different stalls. He smiles sweetly at the old lady that offers him to try one of her organic strawberries. Carlos watches him as he bites into it, smiling as TK’s smile grows at the taste. He opens his mouth when TK turns to him, offering him a piece, and nods when he asks if they should get a pound of the berries.

“What do you think is up with them?” he asks curiously after paying the woman.

“Oh god, who even knows with those two,” TK answers with exasperated fondness. It’s a familiar tone for TK when talking about his parents and their weird relationship. “I rather not speculate, to be honest. I don’t need any more parental trauma,” he says with a dry smile that says he’s only half-joking.

Carlos lets out a sympathetic sound before touching his shoulder, tugging him gently towards him. He’s relieved when TK comes into his space without hesitation. Even though TK has repeatedly told him everything is okay between them and understands his situation, Carlos can’t help but be unsure. He knows he really hurt TK just a few days ago in this very place, and the thought has been plaguing him since. He can’t stop thinking of when they first began and how TK’s reluctance to define them hurt him. But back then, they weren’t in love. If TK denied them now, he’d be heartbroken.

It kills Carlos that he did that, allowing his fears to take over, hurting the man he loves.

“Hey,” TK questions quietly, his green eyes soft and loving. “Where did you go? You were a million miles away just now.”

He shakes his head and forces a smile on his face hoping it’s enough to distract TK. The sad, knowing look on TK’s face tells Carlos it isn’t. He winces at the loud sigh he lets out.

TK reaches out, touching his thumb to his brow, smoothing it over, and Carlos can’t help a sound of his own at the gentle touch. He closes his eyes as TK leans in, pressing his lips to his temple as he hugs Carlos to his side.

“Stop feeling guilty already,” he murmurs against his skin, huffing out a dry laugh when Carlos tries to deny it. He gives Carlos a look as he pulls back. “It’s like you think I can’t read you like a book by now. I see every worried look you send my way. It looks like you’ve had a stomach ache for days now, enough, baby,” TK lightly scolds him, his affection for him shining through it. “We’re moving past it, okay?” he finishes in a serious tone.

Carlos looks at him and finds nothing hidden behind his eyes he doesn’t mean. He opens his mouth to say yes, that he’ll listen this time and move on from their fight when he stops short, the reason for their argument standing by the cheese stall a few feet away from them. “You gotta be kidding me,” he whispers, honestly shocked at the chances. Since when do his parents visit the farmer’s market so damn much?

TK turns his neck to follow his line of sight; he tenses against him when he finds what he’s looking at. “Damn, what are the odds,” he says under his breath. He turns back towards him with a smile so forced on his face, Carlos thinks he actually hears his heart break from seeing it. “I’m going to take a walk around the corner before they see me. You go say hi.”

TK takes a step away from him without waiting for an answer, and Carlos realizes he’s serious; he’s really willing to hide to make sure he’s comfortable. Carlos has never loved and hurt more for someone in his life. He sticks out his hand, taking TK’s before he can take another step away from him.

“No,” he says softly but firm even as his heart pounds like a jackrabbit against his ribcage as he comes to a decision. He’s scared, he can hear his pulse roaring in his ears, but he refuses to let TK feel like he did days ago; he won’t let them go through that again. “No,” he repeats once more as he gives TK’s hand a squeeze. “Nothing ever stays the same,” he reminds him of his comment from the other night, getting a quirk of TK’s lips in return. “And I don’t want it to.”

TK’s eyes widen as he gets his meaning; they stray to Carlos’ parents. They still haven’t noticed them but probably will in a matter of seconds. “Are you sure?” he asks, concerned. “This doesn’t have to happen now, I meant what I said.”

“I know,” Carlos cuts him off, knowing TK has been nothing but sincere since their talk. TK is more than willing to let him set the pace to this, and Carlos couldn’t possibly love him more for it, which is why he can’t hide him from the people he loves. “Come on,” he whispers, tugging on his hand as he starts to walk towards his parents. He feels TK give it a squeeze of his own.

“Mami, Dad,” he calls out to them, getting surprised smiles in return as they turn towards him.

“Carlitos!” his mother says happily, as his dad lets out a chuckle.

“Twice in one week at the same place,” he says with a grin. “Is the farmer’s market where first responders hang out these days? In my days, we’d just hit a bar,” he teases.

Carlos tries to smile at the joke, but his focus is on his mom, who has quickly zeroed in on his and TK’s clasped hands. She looks up at him with wide, surprised eyes.

She stares at him for a moment more, understanding entering her brown eyes. “Oh,” she says softly.

“Yeah,” he whispers back with his heart in his throat. “Mami, Dad – this is TK,” he says before looking back at him, not at all surprised at the love and support he finds in his gaze. “He’s my boyfriend, and the man I’m madly in love with.”

He turns back to them, finding their attention on him, though they both stray a look at TK once more. “I lied the other day because I was scared,” he tells them, answering their silent question. “You guys and I don’t talk about me being gay, and for years that has worked out fine,” he says, holding up a hand when his father opens his mouth to speak. “I know you guys love and accept me, but it’s been easier all these years to just ignore the elephant in the room because there was never anyone that really mattered to me.”

Carlos turns to look at TK once more, smiling at him as his heartbeat settles into a peaceful rhythm. He knows, no matter what happens next, everything will be fine because he has TK.

“That’s changed now,” he finishes knowing how true it is.

There is silence between the four of them for a moment before his father clears his throat. “Well, it’s nice to meet you, TK,” he says with a small but sincere smile.

“Yes,” his mother follows gently. “Very nice to meet you.”

TK swallows first before giving them a smile of his own; it’s nervous at the edges but beautiful. “It’s very nice to meet you too.”

His mother smiles at TK the same smile she usually reserves for him, it’s welcoming and kind, and it loosens the tension in Carlos’ shoulders. Proving she misses nothing, she instantly catches it, her expression changing once more as she looks back at him.

“You were scared to tell us about your relationship,” she comments quietly, looking sad when he gives her a shaky nod. “Oh, Carlitos,” she lets out a sigh before taking a step towards him.

Carlos swallows hard as she looks up at him, holding his breath when she reaches out, touching his cheek. “Tu sabes que te amamos, no importar qué, si? Siempre mijo, we love you,” she says sternly with tears in her eyes.

Carlos looks over at his dad, who looks affected by her words too. “Listen to her, son,” he says gruffly. “Your mother is always right.”

“That’s right,” his mother answers smugly, as she gives him a  watery smile. She pats his cheek lovingly before she looks over at TK again.

“You have a kind face,” she tells him, chuckling when TK blushes a bit. “Sweet boy,” she grins. “I can’t wait to get to know you better.”

“Maybe Carlos can bring him to Tia Lucy’s,” his father suggests suddenly, and Carlos lets out a startled laugh at the way his mother lights up.

“Yes,” she says enthusiastically. “Oh, you have to, Carlitos. You know how Tia Lucy loves pretty boys. She’ll adore him.”

“I would love to take him,” he says after clearing his throat, still a little shell-shocked at the turn of events. “That is if TK is okay with it.”

TK nods quickly as a bright smile takes over his face, and Carlos has to hide his own as his mother’s eyes widen in response; he understands her reaction perfectly. It’s taken months to not be completely overwhelmed by TK’s beauty.

“Okay, then,” his father says with a clap of his hands. “That’s settled then, we’ll see you both on Sunday. TK – “ he continues as he holds out his hand to him. “It was nice to officially meet you. You’re okay for a firefighter.”

“Thank you, sir,” TK chuckles as he shakes his hand.

Carlos is pulled into a hug by his mother and then his father, both of them squeezing him tight. His mother surprises both him and TK by pulling him into his own hug. She whispers something into his ear that causes TK to smile again as he nods at her.

They watch them leave, rounding the corner before TK turns to him with the gentlest smile he’s ever seen.

“I’m so proud of you,” he whispers, wrapping his arms around him before the first tear falls down Carlos’ face.

He shakes, but TK just holds him tighter, running his hands up and down his back. Whispering that he’s there, and he has him until Carlos can take a steady breath. When he pulls back to look at him again, TK is ready, wiping the tears off his cheeks.

“What did my mother say to you?” he asks, holding his breath at the bright smile TK gives him.

“She thanked me for loving you,” he tells him, causing Carlos to swallow around another lump of emotion forming in his throat.

“She’s right,” he whispers as he leans in, pressing his forehead against TK’s. They stay like that, blind to the world around them. Right now, there is nothing but TK and his love in Carlos’ world. “Thank you for loving me.”

TK closes his eyes, his adoring smile firmly in place. “Loving you, Carlos, is the easiest thing I have ever done.”

translation for what Carlos' mother says to him: You know we love you, no matter what, right? Always, son

[cowboycatreign]

Not my gif

🩸🔪Saber🔪🩸

Warnings: Light swearing, reader being a gay bitch, cannon typical violence, SLOW BURN

Fennec x nb!reader (no pronouns stated)

This is my first fic so sorry if it is horrible

———————————————————————————————————

I know this is my job, but it doesn’t mean I hate doing it any less. Also, before you mention it, I know that I choose to do my job this way. Well enough complaining, I have to get this done.

As soon as I enter the room in my maroon ball gown all eyes are on me. As I walk directly over to my target I noticed a table with a big man that almost looked like a body guard. This was my target, well sort of. This is the part I hate, I go to sit on his lap and his eyes get this sinister glint. I introduce myself, like he cares. He looks at me with such entitlement that is makes me want to off myself or him. I push my thoughts out of the way as I begrudgingly plant our mouths together in a kiss. Saying I hate it would be an understatement. This is my chance. Because he is so involved with the kiss he doesn’t even notice me turn my ring into a dagger. In one quick motion I slit his throat. Surprisingly no one had noticed till his heavy ass body hit the floor. This sound caused everyone in the whole bar to look over and see what happened. Most people started screaming and running. So I took my opportunity’s. “Sweetheart do you want to go back to your parents?” I ask my target. I don’t get a response in words, just by them shaking their head yes. Right when I pick them up people start shooting at me. I am not endangering my target, so I turn my back to shield them. Luckily they have a storm troopers aim. I run to safety and check to see if I had gotten shot. “Are you okay?” My target seemed to be about 6 years old so I could be honest, instead I just said, “yes sweet pea. Are you okay? What’s your name?” They shook their head then confidently said, “My name’s Kona and I’m six and half!” Displaying their age on their fingers. I giggled slightly cause how could you not? I picked them up and started walking to my ship. About half way there I decide it would probably be a good idea to take my heels off before I utterly obliterate my ankles.

Once I get back I escort them to their parents. As soon as we are insight of Kona’s parents I let them down so they can run to them. It was so sweet I am pretty sure my teeth were rotting. They give me my money and leave. I get called into my bosses office, oh fun. “You know you can’t ask questions right? That is the rule, you get employment so you don’t ask questions.” My boss seemed to be annoyed with not only my behavior, but the fact that I actually completed the job and got payed in full. Instead of replying with sass or something else that won’t get me very far, I just simply sate, “I knew that this target was a kid. I draw the line at murdering kids or giving them to people so that they can be leverage. So, I asked questions.” “I don’t care where your lines are drawn we have a no questions policy!” She has always hated me and it all seemed to be coming out right now. I nod my head so that I would seem as though I am just dismissing her. “I am going to give you another chance because Even though I hate to say it, you are the best bounty hunter we have. Your next job will be shared. You are going to be partnered with a legendary bounty hunter, so don’t embarrass yourself. I will give you more info later. Oh and put some shoes on!” After this very one sided conversation I turn around as fast as possible so that she doesn’t seeing me rolling my eyes.

My time alone seemed to pass in an instant, but now I had to look like my life wasn’t falling apart at the seems. “I wonder who this legendary bounty hunter is?” I thought to myself. I pulled the closest thing I could find on which happened to be a brown, one sleeved, skin tight, turtle neck and some navy blue baggy almost sweat pants. Looking at myself in the mirror I looked like a hobo. I wanted this super serious amazing bounty hunter to take me seriously, so I grabbed a black over the top corset and put it on. Not moments later I left with my shoes in hand. Walking through the streets of Batu was interesting to say the least, but I was trying to get where I needed to go. So, instead of dealing with all the people I took the roof route. It is faster, less distracting, you are less likely to get killed, and just over all a better option. Plus, I found it so fun.

Once I got to my agency I made my way inside and into my bosses office. Once I enter I see a woman in the office with me, “this might be the incredible bounty hunter” I thought to myself. As if reading my mind she turned around and revealed her face. It took my a minute to notice her, but this was Fennec fucking Shand! She was known as one of the most bad ass bounty hunters out there. I immediately drop my shoes in shock. She nods in my direction cause me to blush because Jesus she is pretty! Trying not to embarrass myself anymore than I already have I nodded back and walked past her to greet my boss. She looks at me and laughs at my fluster. She formerly introduces us, saying, “I figure you guys already know who the other one is, but this is legendary bounty hunter Fennec Shand and this is Y/n.” Fennec then states, “I have heard a lot about you, it’s good to finally put a face to the name.” As if I wasn’t already dying she made me turn into a tomato. I some how chocked out, “It is a pleasure meeting you.” She laughed at my struggling. Feeling the tension in the air Shirley started telling us about our target, but I didn’t really pay attention to it, I was just staring at Fennec.

“So do you want to lure the target and I kill?” Fennec started talking and in all honesty I was dozing off because I had a long ass day. She then nudged me and smiled saying something along the lines of, “what, are you already sick of me dagger?” I was honestly so out of it that I just stumbled a little bit and said sorry to whoever I hit. “Oh wow, are you okay?” Fennec asked bending down a little bit to ask me that question. I looked at her and started apologizing. She told me that I am okay and everyone has rough days. She is incredibly soft for a universe class bounty hunter. “Can I go back to your place and talk about strategy?” She was so kind it astounded me. In the middle of that thought, other bounty hunters started shooting at us and trying to take us hostage. I took a dagger from my hair threw it at one of them and killed the rest with my lightsaber. Fennec looks at me with something that says both, “wow that was amazing” and “stupid bitch I could’ve done that by myself.” I wonder which one it was, cause I am so nervous I made a bad choice, but whatever. To get some of my feelings out I turn and wink at her before walking again.

We secure our target smoothly. So in celebration I brought her some spotchka and offered a high-five. Of course she accepted and said, “nice work saber.” That nickname is so annoying, but also amazing. I started giggling at the attention and returned the compliment. The thought of being with her returns to my mind. So naturally I tell myself, “SHUT UP! NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR EXISTENCE, LET ALONE HER.” Apparently I showed it on my face cause fennec shoved me and asked, “saber, you okay?” I absentmindedly nod yes. My brain decided to betray me by making me blurt, “Do you want to stay partners? Like always be paired up on missions?” Fennec stares in a blank, unreadable face and then states that, “I’ll have to think about it.” My face falls thinking that I ruined something else, but fennec messes up my hair and says, “well I thought about it and my answer is yes.” I looked at her in the face, you could tell she thought that this was hilarious. I started screaming, “FENNEC I SWEAR TO THE MAKER IF YOU DO THAT AGAIN I WILL MURDER YOU!” She just pushes me and says in a very cocky tone, “you know you love me.” I roll my eyes in return. This earns a fake hurt face from fennec. “Okay, your right, I do.” It has been 10 years…

[starlocked01]

Toddlers Scare the Living Shit Out of Me

AO3 Link

Dukexiety Week Day 4- Parents

WC: 3k

Summary: Virgil is very surprised when he's brought home by a fascinating stranger at the bar. A kid wasn't exactly what he agreed to in a one-night stand. Nor did he expect a relationship.

Content Warnings: Alcohol Use, Talk of divorce, Swearing, Mild gory language

@dukexietyweek

(also thank you @suchaswearemads for their OC Teddy 🧡)

Virgil was mildly aware that he might regret this if he lived until morning. His roommate would probably have a statistic at the ready about criminals luring victims away from clubs with whispered promises of sex or drugs, and how often they target gay men. Virgil snorted a laugh to himself. Poor Lo would kill him himself if he knew what Virgil was up to. This guy even looked the part of an unhinged surprise organ donation scheduler, all covered in spikes and tattoos of anatomical cross-sections all over his visible skin. If Virgil were any drunker, he'd probably mistake him for a skeleton or half dissected cadaver.

He really didn't care. He was drunk and Remus said pretty words that made him feel wanted. He'd follow the cadaver man halfway around the world like this. Exactly proving Logan right that he shouldn't go out drinking alone. He giggled and stumbled and giggled because he stumbled and the ground was spinning under his feet.

"What’s so funny, Dr. Gloom 'n' Giggles?" Remus caught Virgil and pulled him back upright, even as his brain fought to stay closer to the ground and made the whole damn world lurch in protest.

"Hey! 'M fine. Yourrr gonna kill me, bad man mad man. Fuuuuuuuck I had way too- didya spike 'e?" Virgil struggled to form a single, coherent sentence, feeling the alcohol's effects acutely and in increasing measure with each step towards doom and destruction.

Remus laughed, "ya caught me. Why don't I call you a taxi home?"

"Nooo! I sssaaid I'd come home withya- ssooo I am," Virgil shook his head and tried to stand and remain upright. His attempt lasted all of a second before Remus had to catch him again.

"Look, I don’t need you trying to puke all over my dick or something. I'm calling you a fucking cab," Remus tried to reason but Virgil heard none of it as he yanked himself away to hurl in the bushes.

"'M fine. Commmmming down," Virgil panted, trying desperately to steady himself. After several deep breaths and false starts, he managed to stay upright and reach for a steadying hand. Whatever had knocked him on his ass so quickly was also fading just as fast, "shiitt, did you spike my drink?"

"Nah, man. Come on, we're almost there."

---

Remus stared at this drunk little catch from the bar and was glad he was the one who'd picked him up. Someone must have tried something funny with his drink. Bad enough news for everyone else still at the club but at least this one was safe.

Remus shook his head and checked his phone to call a cab only to find the phone dead already. Shit. No way to warn Roman now. Remus waited for Virgil to finish puking his guts out on the neighbor's lawn, pretty dead set on getting this guy help as soon as they got home and he convinced Ro he needed a favor.

Slowly, he helped Virgil towards his front door, surprised at how fast the intoxication seemed to be turning around as Virgil got steadier on his own feet. Remus winced when he couldn’t find his keys and cursed when Virgil reached out and rang the doorbell.

"Stop! It's way too late for that!" Remus hissed as the door quickly opened to a very pissed-off looking Roman.

"Are you crazy! Pat's asleep- oh… oh who the fuck is this?" Roman asked, stepping outside and shutting the door behind him, "Remus, you promised tonight!"

"Ro, calm down. This is Virgil. Yes, I promised, but do you think you could take-"

"No!" Roman exclaimed furiously, "I have work tomorrow! I can't take Pat. Send Virgil home and be a grown-up for once!" Roman grumbled and turned abruptly back inside.

"Roman! Someone tried to spike him-" Remus hissed, pulling Virgil inside with him "-and before it hit, he was the best guy I've met in my life."

"Oh you mean just like Mr. Wonderful?" Roman snarked back in a low voice as he gathered his belongings. Remus winced at the reminder.

"Don't be a dick, brother dearest. That's my job. Please, I promise this time will be the last-"

"I can't! Teddy is already worried that I'm out this late. We love Patton but we're not raising him for you. You're not a kid anymore, Rem. Learn to date like an adult because we're not babysitting while you go out clubbing like this again," Roman huffed and stormed toward the door, "sorry to meet you like this, Virgil. I hope you feel better soon."

Virgil barely lifted his hand to wave as Roman left and shut the door with a dreadful finality. Remus slumped and sat at the foot of the couch Virgil had sprawled on.

"Sorry about him. How ya doing, Virgie?" Remus asked quietly.

Virgil groaned, "head hurts. Still tipsy. What the fuck did you do to my drink?"

"I didn't do anything but save you from whoever did," Remus shook his head and stood, "I'll get you some water. Or gatorade. Or milk. Fuck what do I even-"

Remus was suddenly cut off by clattering dishes and a small whimpering coming from the kitchen. In a few swift steps, he entered the kitchen and flicked on the lights to find a plate toppled from the counter to the floor, the fridge cracked open, and a toddler trying very hard to hide behind the trash can.

"Pattycake! What are you doing sneaking around in the dark?" Remus slapped on a grin and swooped the child into his arms with a grunt, "oh big boy. Getting too old to pick up like this."

Patton squeaked in his father's arms as he was lifted up, "got loud, Papa. Unkie Ro promised me a second cookie before bed."

"He did now?" Remus asked, eyebrows raised in mock shock.

"Mhmm. Said Unkie Teddy'd bring it. Where's Unkie Teddy?"

"Oh no! Ro was gonna call the cookie monster himself to get ya?" Remus gasped as he shifted his hold on the child and nudged the plate under the sink to take care of in the morning, "Uncle Ro promised you a cookie monster and didn't show up? That fiend!" Remus giggled with Patton as he grabbed a couple of water bottles from the fridge, shutting the door with his hip.

"Unkie Monsta!" Patton giggled, clinging to Remus’s neck.

"Mhmm. It's really late buddy. You should get back to bed," Remus cooed as he dropped one of the water bottles on Virgil’s chest.

"What the hell-?" Virgil tried to sit up, utterly confused who Remus was talking to now.

"Hey! You don't get to cuss in front of my kid until date five!" Remus snapped, holding Patton close. Virgil blinked at the baby blue eyes, curly blonde hair and the overwhelming amount of freckles as the child stared back at him with a mixture of fear and curiosity.

"Papa, who's that? He looks spiky," Patton whimpered, quickly hiding his face from Virgil.

"Baby, I'm spiky. I like spiky people," Remus carefully soothed, running a hand through soft curls, "he's one of Papa's new friends."

Virgil watched, unamused, "you didn't say that you have a kid. What, were you planning on bringing me back here with a toddler who could walk in and see anything?"

"Look, I was trying to ask my brother to babysit him overnight. You're hella cute but I didn't expect to make this introduction so quickly," Remus huffed, "Pattybear, be nice and say hi and then you best be headed back to bed, mister."

Patton peeked one eye out to appraise the stranger in his spot on the couch. After a long moment, he waved and barely audibly whispered a small, "hi."

Virgil smiled at the typical child response to his neon purple hair and uncountable piercings, but Remus laughed loudly, startling both the drunk man and the child, "oh Come on! That was weak shit, Pat-Pat. Say it like you mean it!"

"That's not necess-"

"HI!" the tiny voice bellowed over his protests. Father and son laughed together as Virgil sputtered.

"Now that's what I'm talking about, my little monster! Alright, enough fun. Back to bed, you rascal. Papa has to take care of the baby who drank too much apple juice," Remus beamed and set Patton down on the ground, waving as the child sped off back to his room.

"Cute kid. You didn’t mention a kid earlier," Virgil groaned and laid back down on the couch, head swimming.

"Yeah well, kids are chick magnets," Remus replied, not meeting Virgil’s eyes.

"Okay?"

"I'm into dudes…"

"And? It's not like a kid is gonna send good guys running," Virgil shrugged, very much regretting his choice of drinks that night.

"Yeah, you haven't run yet. But that was a very tired out and pacified little scamp you just met. You'll see in the morning- unless you wanted me to call you a cab now?" Remus asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I don't wanna move," Virgil murmured, "but I would like kissesss."

"Direct. I like it," Remus smirked and slid down to kneel next to the couch, "but that would be taking advantage of your weakened defenses. Sleep it off and ask me in the morning."

Virgil whined and pouted at the denial, "please? I came all this way."

"Well, if you insist," Remus grinned and leaned in close. Virgil smirked and pulled Remus forward that last inch. Virgil tried hard to enjoy the kiss but the fact of the not yet sleeping child in another room tempered his desires greatly. After a minute, Remus pulled back and grabbed a blanket off the back of the couch.

"To be continued, Dr. Love."

"Fine. Good night," Virgil sighed and watched Remus stand and leave the living room, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

---

Virgil awoke the next morning to a warm palm pressed against his cheek. He slowly blinked his eyes open to find bright blue eyes framed with thin black wire-rimmed glasses. Squinting out the light to protect himself from the impending headache, Virgil finally recognized the child from the night before.

"Hey, Patton-"

"Angels sing and demons cry, but we can't tell the difference," Patton stated sweetly, head tilted to one side.

"Hey Kiddo, breakfast time!" Remus called from the kitchen, "is Virgil up yet?"

Virgil felt a chill run down his spine as the child giggled, patted his face, and called back, "yes Papa! We're coming!"

Virgil groaned and sat up slowly, sore from sleeping on the couch with his piercings still in. How he'd managed to fall asleep in skinny jeans absolutely baffled him, almost as much as the peculiar little kid staring at him expectantly.

"What d'ya want, kid?"

"A kitty!"

"I don't have a kitty."

Patton’s eyes immediately brimmed with tears and his lip quivered before the child ran screaming back to the kitchen.

Virgil was sorely tempted to roll back over and hope he woke up somewhere quieter, but the smell of bacon and the temptation of seeing Remus in the daylight pushed him to his feet.

The guy he'd met in the bar had practically disappeared once Patton showed up. Remus had been flirty and suggestive and very interested in Virgil all night but nothing in his behavior would have ever led Virgil to suspect he had a kid and was capable of acting so.. fatherly. The man’s duality was almost unsettling.

Virgil walked over and stood in the door of the kitchen, silently watching Remus encouraging the weeping little boy to sit down and eat toast. He still wasn't sure why Patton had thought he would have a cat with him, but the disappointment had surely gotten to the little fella.

Remus looked up and gave Virgil a tired grin, "heya, sleeping beauty. How's your head?"

"Threatening to disown me. I didn’t touch him. He asked if I had a cat," Virgil nodded to Patton, hoping that Remus didn't think he'd purposefully hurt the kid.

"Oh don't worry. He asks everyone. His dad promised him one and well, do you see a litter box?" Remus rolled his eyes, standing and guiding Patton to the table, "you'd think after so many empty promises, the kid would know better, right?"

"Wait… you're his dad, right?" Virgil frowned.

"Nope!" Patton giggled, twirling his spoon between his fingers, "Dada lives in the big house!"

"Patton, eat your breakfast!" Remus barked, not unkindly before turning back to Virgil with a sigh, "no offense, but Patton’s dad is not exactly first date story material. Neither is Patton but well, that can't be helped now."

Virgil bit his lip, "right. None of my business… Except I shouldn't be here if you're married."

"I'm not married, sweetheart," Remus held up his hand to show off the lack of a ring.

"And this mystery father isn't… ya know," Virgil drew a finger across his throat in a wordless question.

"I fucking wish! Look, it's none of your damn business, Virgil. You want breakfast or the door?" Remus snapped, turning back to the food on the stove.

Virgil sighed and sat down next to Patton at the table, idly arranging shaped blocks in a haphazard pattern, "I'm sorry. I just don’t want to get in the middle of something complicated without knowing that's what's up. Yo, got another triangle for me, Pat?"

Patton grinned and grabbed a triangle from the table before shoving it somewhat painfully into Virgil’s palm. Remus watched the interaction and sighed overly dramatically.

"Hey, baby, why don't you go get dressed and pick out a movie?" Remus ruffled Patton’s hair, "no horror movies today though."

"Awwwww but I love the scary ones," Patton moped but obediently left the table.

Remus waited until Patton was out of sight before replying, "look, I don't have any secrets. I got nothing to hide. The only complicated thing right now is custody. My ex and I are separated and don't talk. Hell, I try to get him to pick Pattom up from Roman and Teddy's every chance I get. I love the little tyke but his dad pisses me off."

Virgil bit his lip, "that does not sound ideal."

Remus shook his head, "it's not. Like one day you're planning a wedding and processing an adoption, then before you know it you're divorced and fighting with the man you love for custody of the child he said made him sick to look at." Remus gritted his teeth, "Pat deserves so much better…"

Virgil nodded along with Remus’s story, "so why go out clubbing during your time with Patton? He doesn't need two absent fathers."

Remus chuckled, "don't freak out, but the first one of us who remarries has a huge advantage in getting full custody. Because neither of us is biologically related to Pat-Pat, it's become way too much of a battle.

"I'm sorry," Virgil whispered, studying the grain of the wood in the table.

"It's alright," Remus shrugged, "you're alright, Virge. Can I get that number now?"

Virgil laughed and took the offered phone, "yeah, call me when you've got some free time and Patton is with his dad."

Remus grinned and pocketed the phone, "oh you'll see how this works, sweetheart."

---

Patton was nearly a constant whenever Virgil met with Remus, but at least Roman had been mollified by Remus having a steady date so he and Teddy resumed babysitting during more adult dates. The Remus he'd met at the bar never quite resurfaced in the same way, sometimes the actual image of the tatted-up punk caring for a sweet little angelic-looking demon spawn of a kid took Virgil by surprise, and sometimes he was shocked with the things this man would say to his kid. Teddy constantly questioned Virgil why he had stayed even after learning more about the whole situation.

Virgil wasn't certain why. Patton had definitely tried to scare him off a few times. The kid was terrifying when he wanted to be.

But this little family was so very compelling, and Virgil was more and more certain with each date that he wanted a place in it.

"So, sugar…"

"Yeah, Rem?"

"I have a modest proposal for you-"

"Nope. Not gonna eat babies."

"Wha-?"

"Oh, shoot I thought for sure you were talking about the satirical essay. What's up, babe?" Virgil winced and turned to face Remus.

"How would you… like to start the process to become one of Patton’s legal guardians?"

"You're asking your boyfriend to adopt your kid who already has two dads?"

"Well yeah, because-"

"Because then the paperwork is ready to sign right after the wedding," Virgil interrupted with a grin, "you sneaky son of a biscuit!"

Remus laughed, "please, baby?"

"Not my call, sweetheart," Virgil smirked, "hey, Pattycake!"

Little feet pounded down the hallway, Patton skidding to a halt in the kitchen, "yeah? Prince Sparkles is in danger so this better be important!"

"You can save the Prince soon enough, kid. How would you feel-" Virgil suddenly felt very nervous as the gravity of the question finally hit him, "-how would you like… another dad?"

"Umm.. do I have to meet him?" Patton looked disappointed and confused.

"No, Pat-attack, Virgil is asking if he can be your dad too," Remus explained gently.

"You aren't already? I demand you be my dad this instant!" Patton bellowed at Virgil, pouting with the most betrayed expression he could muster.

Virgil laughed, "don't worry kid, this is just gonna be the paperwork that makes it official. You know I got you."

"Yay! New Dad! New Dad!" Patton beamed and ran around the table to dive into Virgil’s arms. Virgil caught him with a grunt and leaned into Remus.

"I think that's a yes from me," Virgil murmured

"Most excellent. Now I've got both my boys!" Remus grinned and wrapped both in a bear hug to seal the deal.

[apolloloki97]

“Gay Judas” Mickey Milkovich x Ian Gallagher

Summary: When Mickey hears about Ian’s Gay Jesus bullshit, he decides it’s time to intervene.

Word Count: 2235

Warning: Swearing, Bipolar Disorder

Song I Wrote To: “Heat Waves Stripped-Version” by Glass Animals

Note: I really needed Mick to show up and shut this shit down and so I wrote this.

--------

Mickey Milkovich had uprooted his life for Ian Gallagher and he was happy to do it.

That is until it involved Ian being a complete moron. 

Mickey had been at a random bar somewhere outside the main city he was staying in while in Mexico when he had caught a shot of his ex-boyfriend’s face on someone’s phone nearby. All it said was Chicago’s Gay Jesus and Mickey knew something was very wrong. It didn’t take him long to find the articles about Ian’s new crusade and that was when he had risked a call to Svetlana.

Hearing that Ian had become some kind of gay symbol was one thing, but the way he was doing it told Mickey another: Ian was in a manic stage and nobody was helping him. That was how he found himself back on the streets of the Southside with an angry Russian hooker by his side. “This one,” Svetlana said as she pointed to a church on the corner. 

Both Svetlana and Mickey paused as they stared up at the banners that hung on the outside of the church. “Fucking hell, Ian,” Mickey swore as he saw the ridiculous illustrations of the ginger on banners and even t-shirts. 

“What’s the plan? Punch moron till he stop?” Svetlana asked. 

“Depends on if his little cultists swing first,” Mickey said as he scratched at his nose with his thumb before taking a deep breath. “Alright, Svet, take me to church.” 

Ian was in the middle of a sermon, sort of, when Mickey burst into the room, Svetlana following right behind him. “Alright rainbow warriors, take a fucking seat!” Mickey yelled, announcing himself. Ian stared at the man in front of him, unable to think clearly. Trevor, who had begrudgingly gone to this specific meeting was looking between the two in confusion. 

“What the shit!” Ian exclaimed, unsure of what else to say. 

“Svet, grab him,” Mickey ordered and then all five-foot-seven of pure Russian confidence was charging down the aisle towards a surprised Ian. Mickey watched as Svetlana grabbed Ian and nearly tackled him to overpower him. Ian was strong, always had been, but Svet was just as pissed at him as Mickey was.

“You idiot,” Svetlana said as she grabbed Ian by the back of his neck and took his arm, dragging him off the dais. Ian stumbled after her, still trying to get the right words out. 

“Hey! Let him go!” one of Ian’s disciples said as they moved to follow them. Svetlana pulled her knife and leveled it at the girl. Trevor stood then, ready to intervene. 

“Fucking hell, Svet! Put the damn knife away, we’re in a fucking church,” Mickey said as she lowered the blade and continued to push Ian towards the door, but Gallagher was starting to resist.

“Come, Orange Boy, we need to talk,” Svetlana said, hooking her arms around Ian’s biceps. 

“No! Ian! You can’t just take him!” Another girl said as she cried out for her "savior". 

“Ah, don’t worry your little gay heads about it, I’ll bring your pariah back in one peace,” Mickey said, flipping her off before going to follow Ian and Svetlana. 

“Who the hell are you?” a younger man said, trying to step into Mickey’s path. Mickey just grinned at him before punching him in the face. The guy fell amongst the pews and Mickey turned to the rest of the room, splaying his arms wide. 

“Just call me Gay Judas,” Mickey said with a wink.

“Mickey!” Ian screamed, causing Mickey to roll his eyes. Trevor began to move toward as Mickey’s name fell from Ian’s lips. He knew immediately that this was the Mickey and Trevor was not about to let the convict take Ian away from him. 

“Svet, get the bag!” Mickey said as he ran off after them. Trevor followed, bursting through the front doors just to see Svetlana throwing Ian into the back of an SUV with a black bag over his head. Mickey slid into the front seat and started up the engine. He gave a salute to Trevor as he hit the gas and sped off.

Ian swore from the backseat as Svetlana kept him contained, holding down his arms. “You fuckers!” Ian yelled. “Let me go! What the fuck ever happened to Mexico!” Mickey ignored him, not wanting to answer any questions just yet. Not until they were alone. Mickey didn’t have a lot of time and he needed to make the best of it before his deadline. 

They arrived at the Alibi soon after and Svetlana helped Mickey drag Ian into the basement that Kev usually used to store weed for his and Lip’s “ice cream truck”. Now it was mainly used for interrogations or in Ian and Mickey’s case, interventions. 

Svetlana and Mickey threw Ian down onto a chair and then tore the bag from his face. “Again with the fucking bag!” Ian shouted, nearly growling at Mickey. 

“Shut up, Red,” Mickey said with a warning look. Ian looked around and began to settle down as he realized where he was. Still, it didn’t comfort him to know that his ex had essentially kidnapped him.

Again.

“Thanks, Svet, I owe you,” Mickey said. Svetlana leaned over and kissed him on the cheek before sending another glare at Ian as she turned to leave. As soon as the door closed and locked behind them, Mickey walked forward and landed a punch to Ian’s jaw. 

“Fuck!” Ian yelled. 

“You’re lucky that’s all I did, you fucking idiot,” Mickey said. 

“What the hell are you doing here?” Ian asked. 

“I’m here, you moron, to shut this shit down,” Mickey said, grabbing at Ian’s Gay Jesus t-shirt. “Do you know how many fucking busses and trains I had to take to get back here? Fuck, Gallagher… what the fuck are you doing, man?” Mickey said, lowering his voice a bit more as Ian also began to settle. 

“I’m helping,” Ian said, still trying to grasp the fact that Mickey was in front of him, that Mickey was home. 

“Helping who, Ian? The fucking loons who want to lick your boots? What about being an EMT?” Mickey asked. 

“It wasn’t enough,” Ian argued. 

“Says who?” Mickey countered, but Ian just remained quiet. Mickey swore again, rubbing at his temples as he began to pace in front of Ian. He had planned out this whole speech he was going to say, but now he could barely get the words out. He couldn’t look at Ian without thinking about how the man had left him at the border, alone and heartbroken. However, he knew that Ian was always going to be dealing with bullshit like this. “You’re off your meds, aren’t you?” Mickey asked though he didn’t really need an answer. He knew what it looked like when Ian was manic. 

“Fuck you,” Ian said. 

“Uh, no,” Mickey said, crossing his arms. “I didn’t get back across the border for this shit or for you to be all dismissive when I ask about your fucking well-being. Nobody has fucking noticed have they?” Mickey asked, knowing damn well the Gallaghers forgot Ian existed half the time. Ian didn’t respond, but that was an answer in itself. “Fucking Gallaghers,” Mickey swore causing Ian to look at him with recognition, seeing his Mickey again was making his heart ache. “Get it together, Ian,” Mickey said. 

“Right,” Ian scoffed and Mickey began to lose it. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you? And don’t give me all this 'woe is me bullshit', you’re smarter than this.” 

“These kids need my help!” 

“There are other ways to help them, Ian! Social workers, cops, hell a fucking walk-a-thon, but not this! This is unrecognizable.” 

“Maybe you don’t know me as well as you think you do,” Ian challenged.

“That’s a bunch of bullshit and we both know it,” Mickey said. “I know you inside and out. I know your soul like the back of my fucking hand. Don’t you tell me that I don’t know you, Ian Gallagher. Don’t you say that shit to me.” Ian was quiet then, trying to keep it together. “You want to mean something? Start by setting a decent example for these kids that are following you like a bunch of gay ugly ducklings.”

“You wouldn’t understand,” Ian said. 

“Stop,” Mickey said, approaching Ian. He leaned over and braced his hands on either side of the man below him, his hands digging into the armrests. “You mean something to this world, Ian, but you don’t need to go off the rails to prove it,” Mickey said with a desperate tone to his voice. 

“Why do you care?” Ian asked, staring up into Mickey’s eyes. 

“Why do I care?” Mickey echoed. “Did you forget everything that fucking happened at the border?” he asked as he pushed back from Ian. “I fucking love you, you idiot and I’m worried about you.” Ian was quiet for a moment before he finally sighed and ran a hand through his hair. 

“It got out of hand,” Ian admitted. 

“Yeah, no shit,” said Mickey. “Fuck, where the hell is your family?” 

“Busy,” Ian said with a shrug. That also didn’t surprise Mickey. The time Ian left to join the military, Fiona had barely looked for him. In fact, Mickey couldn’t remember anyone actively looking for Ian until the Army came looking for Lip. That had pissed off Mickey to no end, even if he never told the Gallaghers that. 

“And what about that boyfriend of yours?” Mickey asked, remembering Ian talking about his relationship when Mickey had escaped. 

“He saw me losing it,” Ian divulged with another shrug. 

“And he didn't do anything like drag your ass to the clinic?” 

“No,” Ian said. 

“Fucking hell, Gallagher, you need better friends,” Mickey said, running his hands over his face. His stubble was growing out again and he desperately needed a shave. “This shit stops now, okay?” Mickey urged and Ian nodded, trying to keep it together. Mickey kneeled in front of him and from his jacket, produced the familiar orange bottles that held Ian’s meds. “I picked these up on my way.” 

Ian stared at the pills with disdain but didn’t shove them out of Mickey’s hands to the latter’s relief. “You broke into my house…” Ian said. 

“I still have a key, moron,” Mickey said and then softer, “Come on, baby.” Ian stopped at the use of the pet name. Mickey never tended to use anything but the more insulting nicknames, but there were times when they just slipped out and the gentler side of Mickey was revealed. A side that Ian loved the most.

Ian opened his hand and Mickey doled out his dosage before grabbing a bottle of water from the storage crate and handing it to Ian. With a deep sigh, Ian took all his stabilizers and antidepressants in one go, following up with a few swigs of water. Mickey relaxed as soon as the meds were in Ian’s system, feeling exhaustion weighing on him from all the days he had spent worrying about the love of his life. “Stop trying to fuck up this life you have, Ian,” Mickey said, reaching out to hold Ian’s face in his hand. “You’re so much better than this.” Ian leaned into his palm, savoring the small moment. 

“I missed you,” Ian said, closing his eyes. 

“Missed you, too,” Mickey whispered. Leaning in, Mickey rested his forehead against Ian’s and tried not to let the tears that threatened to spill cascade down his cheek. He didn’t need to get emotional now, he didn’t have much time left. 

“You better get back to Mexico,” Ian whispered. 

“I ain’t going back,” Mickey admitted. Ian pulled back just enough to see Mickey’s face. 

“Why?” he asked. 

“I made a deal,” Mickey said with a sad smile. “I rolled on a cartel back in Mexico. Told the Feds I’d finish my sentence here as long as they gave me the afternoon to finish something up. I took down some pretty fucked up dudes so they agreed. I gotta turn myself in in about twenty minutes.” Ian seemed to deflate then as realization set in.

Mickey was going back to jail because he came to save him. Again. 

“I’m sorry, Mick,” Ian said. Mickey was shaking his head already as he ran his hands over Ian’s shoulders and up to his neck, relishing in the feel. 

“Don’t apologize,” Mickey said, “but fucking visit me this time, will you?” 

“Every week,” Ian promised without hesitation. 

“Soft,” Mickey teased, and that caused Ian to laugh finally. He then turned serious. 

“Thanks, Mick,” Ian said. "Thanks for coming to get me.”

“I always will,” Mickey promised. “Especially when you’re going all psycho-ginger on me.” Ian laughed again and then surged forward to kiss Mickey, crushing their lips together. Mickey savored every taste and feel of Ian’s lips on him, knowing it was going to be a while before they had another moment like this. He didn’t think Beckman would offer conjugal visits anytime soon. When they separated, Ian smiled again. 

“Stop kidnapping me, Milkovich,” Ian said as he kissed Mickey quickly again. 

“What can I say?” Mickey said. “I’m a whore for the dramatics, Gay Jesus.”

“Oh, shut up, you fucking convict,” Ian said as he grabbed him again.

Regardless of what the future held, they still have twenty minutes. 

[weirdo19]

My rwarb reading experience

I think Alex has a full blown crush on Henry without even knowing. Like I feel he’s confused about the difference between love and hate.

NOT ALEX FALLING ON TOP OF THE $75000 EIGHT TIER ROYAL WEDDING CAKE. I-

HOW DOES ONE DO THAT

OH GOD ALEX NO, POOR HENRY. POOR CAKE

HAHA IMAGINE BEING THE REASON WHY THERES A THREAT OF A SECOND ENGLISH-AMERICAN WAR BECAUSE YOU AND THE PRINCE FELL ON A CAKE HAHAHA

I love ellen, she’s funny. “ but as the president, all I want is to have the cia fake your death and ride the dead-kid sympathy into a second term” has me rolling on molly HAHA

Stan Ellen Claremont

AHHHH THE PHONE CALL WAS SO FUCKIN CUTE , RUN ME OVER

God why that sweater for Christmas Alex. Just why

ALEX YOUR NOT BEING A DRAMATIC ASSHOLE. You fucking deserve parents who don’t argue on every turn. It’s not your fault they can’t be adults and I get how tiring it gets. YOU ARE NOT A DRAMATIC ASSHOLE.

I just wanna give my baby a hug, poor Alex.

Wtf is a noogie 👁👄👁

I’m confused, does Alex know he’s gay or bi. Because he can’t not know that. ITS SO FUCKING OBVIOUS

NOT THEM DANCIN TO GET LOW

NOT ALEX FORGETTING THE CONFETTI CANONS

Oh god, poor Henry. My man really just watched his crush kiss someone else

AHHHHHHH THEY FUCKING KISSED, OMGGGGGG FÜCK YES

HOW THE FUCK DOES ALEX THINK HES STRAIGHT, YOUR THE FARTHEST THING FROM STRAIGHT.

ALEX PLS TELL ME HOW YOU THPUGHT YOU WERE STRAIGHT AFTER KISSING YOUR BEST FRIEND FOR AN HOUR ON HIS TWIN BED. HOWWWWWWW YOU DUMBASS

Eeeeeeeeeee Alex just called Liam. Idk how this is gonna go but let’s see.

I’m losing my shit at Henry humming god save the queen so his boner can go away. I can’t stop laughing.

He has diagrams, oh god he has diagrams.

AHHHHH ITS THE ICONIC LINE

“I’m very, very gay” is my new fav quote

I don’t like this friends with benefits thing, it makes me want to bash my head in.

HAHA OMG HENRY CALLING AMERICA THE OFF-BRAND ENGLAND IS EVERYTHING TO ME, ITS SO ACCURATE

I love the karaoke bar scene it’s cute

“Bisexuality is truly rich and complex tapestry” is such an iconic line and i fucking agree

Page 202 is so adorable I might puke

I’m going to fucking THROTTLE LUNA

I’m so fucking glad Alex has Henry. I love them so much

I love zahara, she’s is so funny and such a mood.

I can’t stop laughing, not a fucking PowerPoint. I fucking love Ellen

“Exploring your sexuality: healthy, but does it have to be with The prince of English” slide has me rolling on molly. This is so funny

I’m weeping, the letters 😖

Page 264 and 265 should be illegal and not okay. I’m crying my eyes out.

Alex going to see Henry has me crying

Chapter ten should not fucking exist. That bitch broke me.

Okay maybe i forgive Casey for the beginning of chapter ten since she gave me the V&A scene. “I’m taking a picture of a national gay landmark, and also a statue”

YAYYYYY WE GOT THE LETTERS BACK

I’m about to beat the crap out of Philip

I take my forgiveness back, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT SCENE WITH ALEX AND RAF. 😭

I-, page 322. That’s it that’s all I have to say

I SWEAR TO GOOD PHILIP IF YOU DONT SHUT UP IM GOING TO MURDER YOU IN THE MOST BRUTAL WAY THINKABLE

YES HENRYYYYYY IM SO PROUDDDDD, TELL IT TO HIM

Omg zahara and Shaan high fiving because they had sex is the greatest and funniest thing ever. It gives me Jim and Pam vibes from the office

“I’ve been gay as a maypole since the day I came out of mum, Philip” AND THE CROWD GOES WILDDDDDD

The world wide support has me bawling my eyes out

YES MOMMA CAT, QUEEN SHIT

STAN ELLEN CLAREMONT AND CATHERINE FOX-MOUNTCHRISTEN-WINDSOR

Omg the mural, I need someone to draw that scene pls

I swear to god if Richards doesn’t get his ass thrown in jail I’m gonna throw some hand ✋

AHHHHH THE SPEECH AHEHEHE HER NDNDBRB AHHHHHHHHHHH

Ughhhhh okay fine, I forgive Luna

So what your telling me is that Jeffrey Richards is basically trump

June saying “I majored in nouns” is so fucking funny

Also can we talk about how Liam and Alex are okay, LIKE YAYYYYYY

SHE WON FUCK YES, STAN THE TWO TERM PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, ELLEN CLAREMONT BITCHES

AHHHHHH I JUST FINSHED IT AND ITS PERFECT, I LOVE THIS BOOK SO FUCKING MUCH

[reidgraygubler]

play date (jennifer jareau/reader)

Title: Play Date

Request: no

Couple: Jennifer Jareau/Gender-Neutral!Reader

Category: Fluff

Content Warning:  allusions to parents death, mentions of a parent walking out, swearing (if any), single parenthood, tbh i don’t really know what else to tag. It’s just straight (or gay) fluff.

Word Count: 3,028

Summary: JJ brings her kids to the park where she meets Reader, who brought her kids to play. The pair’s kids become fast friends, as for Reader and JJ? That’s a whole different story.

A/N: this is my first time writing for jj. please enjoy it bc im big soft for her rn (i will also say that about luke too)... this is day four of my 7fics 7days event for 1.2k followers ! Here is the masterlist for that! And here’s my main masterlist! Thank you all for the love and support! 

also, thank you to @reidetic​ for proof reading this :)))

{***}{***}{***}

It was a normal day, right? I mean, that’s what I thought. My kids and I walked to the park after some chores, and after lunch. Nice fresh air, playing in the park, talking to other parents. Do people actually do that? Talking to other parents in the park? It’s been a while since I’ve actually gone to the park with my kids… 

"Make sure you’re safe. And, if you need me, I’ll be sitting here," I pointed to the bench that held my backpack. My daughter looked up at me and nodded before running off. My son on the other hand was a little bit more apprehensive of leaving my side to go play. Part of me wondered if it had to do with all the other kids running around, playing with one another. 

"What’s up, Buddy? Didn’t you want to come to the park?" I looked at him as I squatted to his height. He looked up at me and shrugged, not really telling me what was wrong. "Oh, c’mon, we’ve been to this park before." I sighed and looked at him while I gently ruffled his hair.

"Your sister wants to play with you, go on." I looked towards the park where my daughter was currently playing. It was a relief seeing her playing with the other kids, not by herself. But she was always quick to make new friends and play with new people. So it wasn’t that big of a surprise. 

"Your son can play with my boys if he wants," a woman looked at me with a smile. I looked away from my child and towards a blonde woman who had two boys standing beside her. They looked to be about my son's age. 

"You wanna play with them?" I looked back at my boy, resting a hand on his shoulder. I watched as he looked over at the two new boys, his little eyebrows furrowed together as his lips pouted out a bit. "C’mon they won’t bite."

"Well, Michael might…" the woman laughed as she looked between me and my boy. I looked back at her with a raised eyebrow. "They like playing superheroes," she was quick to add, clearly realizing her mistake. 

"You love superheroes! You could be X-Men!" I clapped my hands together. My son looked up at me with furrowed eyebrows and shook his head. Over by the blonde woman I could hear her boys talking about something. I looked over at the three and raised an eyebrow. "Did I say something wrong?" I looked back at my son. He just looked at me, his eyes just staring at me like I did, indeed, say something wrong. 

"How about," the woman spoke, looking between my boy and I, and then down at her boys, "You three go play superheroes, and when you’re all done, come back to us," she folded her arms over her chest as she looked down at the 3 boys. My son looked up at me with a cocked eyebrow, silently asking if I was totally fine with him going with 2 strangers.

"It’s okay, go on. I’ll be here. Have fun," I winked at him before standing upright myself. He looked over at the two other boys before running off with them. 

"That was easier than I thought it would be," I laughed as I moved my backpack to the ground, before I sat on the bench. 

"They love making new friends. But they can be a little… shy," she laughed as she stepped closer to the bench, "I would do anything for them," she smiled and nodded.

"Please, you can sit beside me." I chuckled as I gestured towards the empty space beside me.

"Jennifer… Jennifer Jareau," she smiled at me as she sat down beside each other on the park bench. I looked at her and nodded. "But you can call me JJ,"

"It’s nice meeting you, JJ," I smiled before giving her my name, "How old are your boys?" I looked over at the playground and spotted our boys playing together. It didn’t look like they were playing superheroes like JJ and I had both thought. It looked like they were playing pirates or something else. 

"Henry is 9 and Michael just turned 6," JJ smiled at me as I looked back at her. "What about yours? How old is he?" she asked, looking out at all the kids. 

"He just turned 5 a few months ago. And my daughter is 10," I smiled and nodded. I looked back out at the playground, looking for my daughter. She was by the slide, talking with one of the other girls. 

"Oh, and you have a daughter?" JJ asked as she followed my gaze to the girl in question. "Well, they both look just like you."

"Well, they definitely don’t have my  eyes and nose," I laughed and shook my head. JJ looked back at me with a cocked eyebrow. "And I swear my little boy has their personality too." 

"He certainly is adorable," JJ laughed as she looked around at the playground. She laughed once she looked at our boys. I was impressed that my son was actually playing instead of just sitting to the side by himself. To be honest, I don’t remember the last time he played with other kids his age. It was a nice change to see for him. He looked like he was having fun, and that’s all that mattered.

"My little king," I laughed lightly as I looked back at JJ. I noticed she was looking between me and our kids. "Do you come to this park often?" 

"Not as often as I’d like. Work can get busy, and then school gets busy," I relaxed my body as I sat back more on the bench.

"Amen to that," JJ raised her eyebrows as she spoke. Her smile was genuine, and I enjoyed looking at it. It gave me a certain joy I hadn’t had in a while. It made me smile. 

"What is it you do for a living? Surely it can’t be too bad," I laughed as I turned to face her more. She copied my movement and faced me too.

"I… I actually work for the FBI," she kept her voice low so no one around could hear our conversation. I looked at her with wide eyes. And suddenly every little bad thing I’ve ever done came to my mind. The one time I ran a red light because I didn’t want to be late. Or, the one time I stole a chocolate bar when I was a teenager. Or, when I cut someone off on the freeway.

"The-the FBI… Great," I nodded as I looked down at my hands. "Beats my media manager job," I laughed again as I looked up at her.

"Don’t worry. Media manager sounds like a great job," JJ smiled at me, reaching over to hold my hand. I looked at her and nodded.

"FBI sounds even cooler. I bet it’s terrifying," I swallowed roughly as I looked at her.

"Sometimes it can be. It’s the thrill of the chase that keeps me going." Her laughter was like cotton candy: sweet and light and fluffy. I couldn’t help but smile again. 

"I would have guessed it was the boys that kept you going. But, I supposed the FBI does do that to someone," I looked down at her hand, which was still holding mine. I could feel my heart rate pick up slightly as I looked down at our hands. I wonder if she knew she was still holding mine. 

"Yeah, I suppose I do have to try to keep up with those boys," she laughed, again, before looking over at our kids. I furrowed my eyebrows before nodding slowly. 

"Surely their dad must be a load of help, while you’re at work," I asked about her husband/partner without actually asking about him. She looked back at me and cringed slightly. "Oh… I’m so sorry," I whispered before dropping my gaze from her face.

"It’s okay. Really, it's fine,"  she pulled her hand from mine and waved it off. Part of me sensed that she didn't want to talk about it. And, that was okay. 

If it was the same situation as me, if they just walked out? Or if he was ever a part of his kids lives… Did he die? And, if so how? Was he a police officer who got killed on duty? Or was he incredibly sick? It was a bit of a touchy subject. That was until she asked...

"What happened to their…” she started as she looked over at me. “If you don’t mind me asking?" JJ looked at me. And I could feel her big blue doe eyes starting into my spoiler soul. I looked at her and shrugged.

"Oh, uh, not in their lives anymore," I sighed before looking towards the playground, "It was just after our son was born too..." I shrugged, leaving my statement as vague as possible so I wouldn’t have to explain that we were left for another person.

"Oh goodness, I’m sorry," she looked at me, gently resting a hand on my lap. I looked down at her hand and felt my heart rate spike again. 

I think she was able to figure out what happened without me saying anything about him. I mean, I figured out what happened to her husband. If I didn't have to explain what happened, then I think that would be best….

"Anyways, I've been a single parent ever since," I smiled as I looked over at her, “I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Those two are my world,” I locked eyes with her. 

“I can agree. Michael and Henry… I’d be lost without them,” she smiled at me as she spoke. With that, we both fell into an odd and slightly uncomfortable silence. We both just turned and looked at our kids playing with each other. I wish it wasn’t so awkward…. 

“So, the… FBI?” I started as I turned back to face her. 

“The FBI,” she laughed and nodded, “I work in the BAU,” she looked over at me.

“What would that be, exactly?” I raised an eyebrow. 

“Oh! Yeah! Right, I forget that people don’t know about all the different sections within the actual FBI,” JJ laughed again, and I couldn’t help but let my heart swell again. “So, there’s a bunch of different branches in the FBI, right. I work in the BAU, which is the Behavioral Analysis Unit,” she explained, looking at me like I already knew what that was. I furrowed my eyebrows as I looked at her.

“Okay, so… What do you do?” 

“Essentially, we read the behaviors of criminals… Like, serial killers, kidnappers… Stuff like that.”

“Like, Ted Bundy?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows.

“Yeah! Kinda. We’ve been all over the country, solving cases, some unsolved ones. It’s a wild world we live in,” JJ swallowed roughly as she looked down at the bench.

“Do you know how many cases you’ve solved? Must be a lot,” I asked, feeling a certain excitement take over. I felt a little embarrassed by the excitement I felt. JJ could sense that too. But I could see how happy she got with my joy. 

“Too many to count, honestly. I’ve been on the team for… 15 years,” JJ’s tone was mildly confused. Like, she wasn’t too sure. 

“Well, if you’ve been in that line of work for nearly two decades, it’s okay if you don’t remember,” I laughed as I reached over and rested my hand on her leg. It was her turn to blush up at my touch. “Media manager isn’t anything cool. Not like travelling the country like an FBI Agent. That’s super cool,” I looked up at her. 

“It is till it keeps you away from home for long periods of time,” she frowned as she looked down at where my hand was resting on her leg. I returned the frown as I retracted my hand.

“I understand being away from home for a while. Although, I think I only go on work trips every six months,” I laughed, trying to cheer her up a bit. 

“Anyways, enough about work,” JJ laughed as she looked back at me. 

I was more than happy when we fell into a comfortable conversation. Better than before, when we fell into the complete opposite, uncomfortable silence. The conversations moved so swiftly from hobbies, to when our kids were younger, to what we do in our free time. Although, our conversations were cut short by a cry from a little boy in the playground.

I instantly shot up to my feet, looking around the playground for my son. JJ was instantly on her feet too, looking for her sons too. The second I saw my son on the ground, in tears and holding his knee close to his body. I sprinted across the playground and right to him.

“Hey, hey, baby,” I knelt to the ground to help him, “It’s okay,” I whispered as I brushed the tears off his face.

“He… He just fell off the playground,” one of JJ’s sons appeared by me. I looked over at him and nodded with an exaggerated pout. 

“That’s okay! Accidents happen!” I looked back down at my son before picking him up and resting him on my hip. He sniffled his nose before pressing his face into my shoulder. “Ohh, is it time to go home?” I frowned as I walked back over to JJ and the bench. 

“Oh no! Did we have a fall?” JJ looked at me as I got closer to her. I frowned and nodded. “I have a first aid kit in the van if you need." She watched as I sat back down. She sat beside me and looked at my son. “Oh, that looks like a rough owie,” she looked at the scrape on his knees.

“You should see his hands,” I looked back at her. JJ looked back at me before standing up. 

“I’ll be right back,” she rested a hand on my son’s head and then mine before leaving us for a moment. 

“Should we go home and take a nap?” I asked, resting my hand on his back. He took a shaky breath and nodded before pressing his head into body. I looked up just as JJ returned with a small first aid kit and a stuffed animal.

“I have X-Men and Batman band aids,” JJ whispered as she sat back down beside me. I turned my son around so he was facing JJ. “Do you want… Wolverine or Batman?” She looked at him with a small smile on her lips. 

“B-batman,” he whispered, looking cautiously at JJ. I watched as she pulled out a wipe, ointment and some Batman band aids. My son looked up at me, tears still fresh in his eyes. 

“This might sting… Do you want to hold Arlo? He’s Michael’s dinosaur,” JJ looked at my son as she offered the bright blue and yellow stuffed animal. I looked down at him as he held out his hands to take the dinosaur from JJ’s hands. 

“You can be a big boy, for JJ?” I asked, brushing more tears off his cheeks. He looked up at me and nodded. I looked back at JJ and nodded lightly so she would just hurry and clean his injuries. 

“Owie,” he cried as he began squirming around. I held him close as JJ tried to be quick. 

“Look! Look! I’m all done!” she lifted her hands to show him that she was truly finished. “You got some pretty cool Batman’s band aids on your knees now,” she pointed at his knees, causing him to look down at them.

“What do you say to JJ,” I whispered, looking at my son’s face. She looked at me, then down at the boy on my knee with a smile.

“Thanks, JJ,” he mumbled before turning to hide into my body. JJ laughed, and looked back at me. 

“You’re welcome, Buddy,” she looked down at him again. 

“And, on that note… I should probably collect my other kid and go home. It’s nap time,” I looked at JJ as I handed her the stuffed Dinosaur. I really didn’t want to bid farewell to her. But, it was time to go. Time had flown by quickly, it was well past nap time and almost dinner time.

“I agree,” JJ frowned as she stood up. I sighed as I stood up beside her. We both called for our kids, waiting for them to run over to us. “Oh, we should exchange numbers… It was nice talking with you, and it’s nice to have friends outside of work,” she laughed as she turned to me again. I smiled and nodded before pulling out my phone.

"We’ll have to set up another playdate soon. I’m sure they all had fun together," I smiled, looking down at my kid. JJ looked at her kids, then over at mine, "Now that we’ve exchanged numbers and all. How would you guys feel about that?" I couldn’t help but let the smile grow across my lips. My cheeks started to hurt a little bit from how happy I was feeling. I honestly don’t remember the last time I was this happy.

"I think that’s a great idea," JJ smiled before looking back at me. I looked back at her and nodded. "And, maybe we can… have a date our… ourselves?" she asked, raising an eyebrow slightly, "Only if you want! I won’t press-"

"That would be… nice," I smiled and nodded, "I’ll call you?" 

"Sounds good! Have a nice night you three," JJ smiled at each of us before corralling her kids towards her van. 

"Who was that?" My daughter looked up at me with furrowed eyebrows. I smiled as I watched JJ drive off.

"A new friend," I answered, looking down at her with a smile. 

if you want to be a part of a taglist or have any comments about this one shot, let me know here

[morathicain]

L M A O mora that teaser really was a trap💀 no but really i don’t even know where to begin? this show has been such a breath of fresh air from beginning to end and that just warms me to my core. and it’s like, if we got angst or an actual breakup this ep i still would’ve ate it up cuz it’s p’aof and i doubt he’d let us down w his storytelling, but we got happiness instead! we got to see that they spent those 4 years still very much together and very much in love and i just!! to know that pran & pat faced their problems together, to know that after getting together they stayed a healthy couple, even through the tough times? i’m soaring rn i swear. and i love me my angsty dramas (especially when they’re done well) but we need more of these feel good shows too!! shows where the couple is happy and don’t have to lose more time/years to misfortune or hurt or whatever! ahhhh😭

and inkpa! ink’s basically a part of their family at this point like seeing how comfortable she looked in their home?? my heart! also side note but pran looks so good!! i mean he always does but this hairstyle on him! cuz when they were in the bar? idk what they were feeding him but he looked Good As Hell i’m losing my minddd.

and???? that scene in [4/4] when pran’s playing guitar for pat had me ready to collapse like they’re so in love i can’t do this! there’s literally only so much i can take! i’m also glad we got to see one last episode of Pat Wants to Sleep Over cuz the work he puts in whenever he’s being kicked out of pran’s room lmaooo and that chaotic ending is so Them like truly an a1 way to end the series alskdjlsk

p’aof really delivered w this show because the bar he set is high! if it wasn’t late already i would’ve had my own little rewatch party cuz my heart needs it lmao. and i’m gonna miss reading your responses😭 i loved reading them so much and getting to understand your take on each episode, literally so comforting (esp your rants!!) thanks for indulging my ramblings and for keeping me company these past weeks🥺 i’m sure i’ll come screaming back to you eventually~~~ hope you enjoyed the episode and you’re have an amazing day/night~~ <33 -🥞

Pancake!!! Aahhhhhhh! I feel you so much and my brain can only keysmash and be happy and giddy and so overwhelmed!

They really gave us this trailer and it shouldn't have surprised anyone that it was a trap all along lmao I do hope P'Aof had some fun time reading some freak outs XD But yeah, even if they'd been apart for 4 years, I would have taken it, bc as you said, I trust P'Aof and it would have made sense as a decision. But to know that they decided to MAKE the world accept that they're in love? That they'd stay together no matter what? The way they spent all their important moments with each other? Aaaaaaaah, this is making me so happy!

P'Aof truly delivered and set a new standard. Tbh even if the last episode hadn't been so beautiful, I would have still loved the show because of all those moments they gave us. And they still topped that!

I do love my messy gay cockroaches and if a couple has a hard time finding to each other but you're right. Pat and Pran showed how it's done. How you can stay true to yourself and stay together and not break with everyone else. Their parents lied to them their whole lives and have left any right to be told the truth. Gosh, their faces when they lied so expertedly XD also, this makes their goodbye right before they fake broke up, so damn dramatic! Ohm shed his fucking TEARS for that! Q.Q

InkPha still going strong was so beautiful to watch and I loved how good it was, how Ink was a part of the family, as you said it. And she's now also a force against the dad. Like, he has everyone on Pat's side and they all have fun together while he tries to stay grumpy. I also think that once their parents realised there was still more going on, over the years, they also realised that if they made a big deal out of it again, they'd lose their kids. And this time for real.

The ending was truly deserving of them and their horny but chaotic love story, omg. Loved it. What a great way to go XD

You're making me emotional, ah! I love seeing them be happy, but I'm sad that it was the finale now. Maybe the rewatch can start next fri-gay and it will never stop? I'm also going to miss your asks and rants and I'm so thankful you honored me with those and enjoyed my rants. Thank you so so so so much! <3333

I wish you a wonderful day/night and hope the finale happiness will stay some more with you =^^= take care and feel free to come by to rant about whatever show you want to <3

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

I decided to watch the Walker pilot so you don’t have to. #2

Because I don’t love myself enough, I guess. Let’s continue.

Recap in case you missed the first part: it’s boring, Jared acts like he stumbled on the set and never heard about it before, Texan law enforcement must wear very pristine shirts and cowboy hats or they will die, I guess, the cinematography wants to be good but I’m not sure it knows how to do it.

The last thing I mentioned in the first post was Jared doing a thing with his mouth but I think you need to see it. It’s basically the extent of Jared’s acting in this show. I had nothing against you, man, I swear. I even got your autograph once. I’m not a hater. I’m just looking at him...

THE TITLE CARD! I had paused the episode riiight before the title card. You have to witness it in all its embarrassing glory

Whose idea was it??

Some shots of the city of Austin. Walker and Martinez (Mexican Lady Cop) are having lunch. She says she’s heard about him, he asks what she’s learnt, she says, I textuallty quote, “I hear you are the edge of the coin”. Again, we are not allowed to have any kind of slight metaphor without the dialogue slapping us in the face with it.

“Not head or tail, just... your way” Jared didn’t even come up with the metaphor in that interview, it was in the script. Unless he came up with that line, which isn’t even a good line.

She basically tells him not to get in the way of her career. Being a Mexican-American cop is hard! Such deep commentary.

They start discussing the case, which I had already forgotten about. The cop who was slightly assaulted and won’t talk about it. “Maybe whatever was in that truck spooked him enough to abandon his oath” maybe it was a monster. god I wish it was a monster so that’d mean I’m watching Supernatural and Jensen is in it. The “oath” thing is kinda icky, like they want to remind us that being a cop is a noble path. It is in some places under some conditions. But we’re talking about Generic American conditions.

He’s like “let’s use the traffic cams to see if we can see something” and he slips right into his Sam tone. Admittedly that’s a Sam kind of thing to say.

It was day, and now it’s night. Walker house. He arrives when his family have already started dinner. Except the daughter isn’t there, she’s out with a friend. “Isabel, some Mexican girl” Walker’s father calls the friend. “Mexican American, dad” the gay brother corrects him, a deep and interesting commentary on ethnicity in the United States, we’re weeping with emotion.

Walker apparently isn’t happy that his mother has enrolled his daughter in a Catholic school, his father snaps back at him. We don’t care. We’re not emotionally invested in any of this.

There’s some awkward dialogue because he mentions the daughter playing basketball, but she’s switched to soccer. Wow, it’s like she’s become an entirely different person in those eleven months he was undercover! Can you believe? Apparently she used to play soccer before, she’s come back to it. Whoa. She’s an utterly unrecognizable person now, it’s going to be so hard for Walker to get to know her again from scratch. Can you believe?

Then he gets a call. He needs to pick up the daughter from the police station. He does some Jared awkward faces and leaves.

The daughter (Stella) was at a party and was arrested for possession. I miss when possession meant demonic possession. Dramatic music plays. She’s there with the Mexican American friend, whose parents arrive and he starts a speech on how they should get to know each other better. It is so not the right context to start making friends. “Epic first meeting” Isabel says. “I’m so sorry, this is so embarrassing” Stella says. “For who?” Walker quips, like a normal person does.

He’s like, let’s go, and the girls hug, which is the only believable expression of affection I’ve seen so far in the episode. Can’t the story be about Stella and Isabel?

Father-daughter conversation in the truck. Apparently we have emotional moments in cars, which we have never seen on television before.

He asks what she was thinking, she’s like, duh what do people use drugs for. She calls him out for disappearing completely. She mentions how it was bad enough that they didn’t have mom. He says “we both got to stop acting like she’s gonna come back and put us right” which makes absolutely zero sense. It’s like someone wrote it on a note for how to develop the characters and they just decided to slap it into the script of the pilot. Remember these people haven’t seen each other for eleven months, he left shortly after his wife died. They didn’t have the time to process the grief together, why is he even saying that line here?

Meanwhile Martinez get home and we meet her boyfriend, a very cute Black man. They’re cute. Why can’t the story be about them?

He asks her about Walker, she says he’s a mess. Oh god. She says he was a Marine, “signed after 9/11”. Holy shit. He’s a Marine who signed up after asdfghjkl can’t you feel the Manly Trauma here????

He’s a Marine who signed up to fight Muslims after 9/11 and now has a dead wife, he’s exactly the kind of male lead character we need right now.

She says she’s trying to figure him out. Her boyfriend is like “dude stop thinking about that guy, he’s not at home trying to figure you out” and she replies “oh I’m pretty sure he thinks he knows everything about me already”.

This is the first scene that hasn’t felt bad so far.

Meanwhile Jared and his brother go to a bar. It’s very ~Texas Aesthetic~, and they’re wearing cowboy hats, of course. You are not allowed to go to a bar without a cowboy hat in Texas. “The brothers Walker” the flannel-shirt-clad bartender says, coming with drinks. Jensen Ackles makes a face somewhere in the mountains.

The brother goes to call his partner and the bartender starts chatting with Walker. She has a conversation with Jared’s awkward faces and she’s like, I guess you left because I couldn’t answer your questions about what happened yo your wife. This is how people converse in real life.

She asks him if he’s alright and he doesn’t answer, instead is like “let’s have a dance”. He doesn’t say he’s fine, but I think it still counts as a I’m Fine Lie Moment #2 because that’s what it is in spirit.

I know you’re bored, I’m bored.

They dance in the Texan bar, I’m distracted by the pool tables and wish this was Supernatural so we’d see Jensen Ackles play pool.

Obviously the dance is interrupted by work - a text from Ramirez who says she’s got something, “office 8am?” so he leaves because he has to wake up early. I’m not kidding.

I was kind of warmed over by Ramirez and her cute boyfriend and by the bar who was kind of nice as a location, when the next scene at the office immediately starts with Ramirez saying “My mom wouldn’t let me play with dolls when I was a kid, so Iearned about cars instead”. I die a little inside. It’s the second time she’s referred to her mother wanting a son...? So she’s badass because she wasn’t raised to be feminine...? Ew.

So they have this lead thanks to her knowledge of cars. They go investigate. I’m bored.

I shouldn’t have said I was bored, because Walker destroys my boredom by having Jared pick up a cross and start talking to “JC” sarcastically asking him for guidance about his kids going to the Catholic school. “Can you stop” Ramirez says, along with all of us.

By the way they’re in a workshop run by an ex-convict who employs former criminals to make figurines (like that cross). I got a bad feeling about this. Former criminal in cop shows is always code for current criminal.

The investigation leads to two guys who work in the store - “oh I know you,” one immediately says when he spots Walker, “you’re the ranger with the dead wife”. Walker is like, what did you say. And the guy is like oh I heard the story of a ranger’s wife biting a bullet near the border, guess you couldn’t protect her uh~~~

They exchange more provocations - Walker calls him some lowlife something and the guy goes to punch him and Walker beats him up. Violently. I’m uncomfortable. We’re supposed to think he’s exaggerating here but... he does get very violent and should not be a cop. Period.

They go to Ramirez’ house because he cut his hand. Her boyfriend is like “baby there’s a dude bleeding on your couch” I want a season of him, exclusively him.

She scolds Walker. Not because he beat up a guy with more force than needed, but because he acted stupid and that’s bad for her career. I’m uncomfortable.

Also, what’s bad is that they’re supposed to work *together*. He says he has his own way of doing things. Yikes yikes yikes.

She says that her theory is that they put them together because he always break the rules. Apparently she read up his cases and he always break the rules. The main character of the show is a cop who break the rules in half the cases he works. Yikes yikes yikes but also did I mention yikes?

No, wait, he acknowledges that he “bends” the rules, like that’s better! Yikes!

More bad dialogue, then Stella’s school calls him. She hasn’t been at school.

He goes to ask Isabel’s mother, who reveals they haven’t their papers yet, so any criminal activity would mean deportation. He talks about it with Ramirez and mentions that his brother who’s a DA could get in contact with the Feds to speed up the papers. Are we supposed to be like “oh what a good guy”? The thing is just creepy to me.

Well, at least Ramirez says something about it, or actually quotes her mother who used to say that the law doesn’t protect us. That’s why she ~burned bridges~ with her family! Apparently because she became a cop.

Ow. Her mother is not speaking to her because for her, her daughter being a cop is like a betrayal. But for her it’s a way to set things right! We’re supposed to think her mother is exaggerated. #notallcops #individualgoodcopscanchangethesystemfromtheinsideforsuredefinitely

Meanwhile their investigation continues. Remember the cross Walker randomly picked up to mock the concept of Jesus? Ramirez stole it. And now they find out there’s heroin in it. Alright... obviously the business that was supposed to rehabilitate former criminals is a cover for cartel drug dealing. What were we expecting. I’m tired.

Ramirez decides to work the case alone and sends Walker to look for his daughter. “I was that kid once, I always wanted to be found”. The impression you get from the scene is that Walker had forgotten about his daughter missing lol. Ramirez insists he goes. I’m uncomfortable with how many times people put on cowboy hats. Someone should count. We’re only 30 minutes in and it feels like it’s happened 80 times.

Alright, a break now! My laptop’s ventilation is running like crazy, VLC and long tumblr drafts are a bad combination. Or maybe it’s just my laptop being allergic to this show.

[watermelonlipstick]

Dreams, Chapter 8

If you haven’t read this series before, you might want to start on Chapter 1, or check out the Dreams Masterlist! Here’s the series description:

When Dean dies for good leaving Sam and his girlfriend (the reader) behind, they must figure out how to carry on without him. Alone, reeling, and unsure what to do next, trying to honor Dean’s memory and follow their hearts gets even more complicated when their nightmares become dreams that feel a little too real.

Title: Dreams, Chapter 8

Pairing: (past) Dean Winchester x Reader, (eventual) Sam Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 1416

Summary: A dream starts to change the reader’s perspective on her life with Sam.

Warnings: angst, fluff, swearing, s l o w  b u r n

           It took weeks but the physical touch you’d gotten so used to came back one handhold at a time until finally it seemed like maybe Sam had made peace with The Sledding Incident. You never forced it, didn’t say anything because you didn’t want to push him away. Waiting felt like starving with a ten course meal on a silver platter in front of you, but it paid off. Whether he realized he was rewarding you or not, the space to let Sam process was met with absentminded hands slipped around your waist at the grocery store, non-secrets hummed into the skin of your jaw and neck as you stood just barely too close, loose pieces of hair tucked behind your ear when you washed glasses at the bar. The positive reinforcement limited the clinging you’d been doing since you’d first driven away from the bunker, knowing that the less you clawed at Sam for scraps of attachment the less he felt like you were in too deep to receive it.

           Repair by repair the cabin started to feel more like yours. The bathrooms got painted a faint baby blue that reminded you of long cloudless afternoons in Sioux Falls and Sam taught you some basic plumbing to fix the water pressure in the shower. It was only slightly less gross than you thought it would be, but Sam was so excited when you put the plumber’s joint caulk on perfectly that it made up for the limescale gunk under your nails. When you worked, Sam pretty much stopped playing podcasts and books, relying instead on an ever-changing kaleidoscope of music Dean would never have let anyone play in the Impala. Some of it you were pretty sure Sam didn’t even like, almost as if he was trying to learn a new culture by jumping in headfirst.

           You kept writing in your journal like you were sending letters back home to Dean from summer camp, giving little updates on the cabin or Sam or ridiculous drama you heard at the bar. At night you and Sam would talk about what should get fixed next and sometimes if you were feeling tough you’d watch Sam look up at the ceiling, hair splayed out on the pillow around him like a halo while he told a story about him and Dean growing up or times you’d been away from them on the road. Every once in a while you’d heard Dean’s perspective of the same event and would give them like a little gift to Sam. His eyes would go soft, hanging on your every word and letting his mouth quirk up a hair at the corners. You’d laugh together, often sadly but surprisingly sometimes not, winding into the crook under his arm and playing the tapes of the memories in your head.

           More and more frequently, you’d have good dreams—or rather, non-nightmares. Dean would get hurt and survive or you’d all be on a job together. Right before you woke up he’d be just about to say something important, warn you of something serious but couldn’t spit it out fast enough. It was frustrating, but so much nicer than waking up on soaked pillows that you just put it in a letter to Dean and tried to move on with your daytime projects and nighttime bar work. Some days it felt like you were going to be okay and then the next you’d be impaled on grief so hard you couldn’t even breathe around it. And yet, always Sam to tie yourself to and slide into the next day.

           It’s cold but bright, the sunlight reflecting and magnifying itself on the snow blanketing the landscape. Salt crunches under the tires of the Impala, just barely louder than the engine and enough to be aware of through a ZZ Top tape. You’re almost on the edge of drifting asleep on the windowsill when Dean grabs your arm.

           “Hey, come on, you can’t leave me.”

           The urgency in his tone jolts you alert. “Why? What’s going on?”

           “I don’t know how much time I have left. There’s a lot I need to tell you.”

           “We haven’t even picked up Sam yet,” you answer, in the self-assuredness of dream logic. “How bad could it be?”

           “It’s me, baby. It’s really me. Dead, everything, the works. I need you to focus, I don’t know how long I can stay.”

           Some small sub-sub-conscious part of your mind jolts to attention. It feels honest, or at least the closest to honest as you had wanted to be in a while. You let yourself indulge it.

           “You, like—really? It’s really…?”

           “Yeah, it’s me. I—I don’t know how to—” and you stop him with a furtive kiss, all hunger and no grace, just wanting to feel what it was like to be against him again.

           Dean swerves a little when his eyes open, momentarily dazed. “Christ, I forgot how good that was.”

           “I don’t—how are you…?” you murmur, having a hard time not only with the information but also with the juxtaposition of your conscious and subconscious knowledge.

           “No bullshit, I’m communicating beyond the grave. Don’t tell Miss Cleo,” he answers, the smirk twisting your stomach like a wrench.

           “Are you okay? If this is what it’s like to be dead then Sam and I will be here the second I wake up, we’ll just come to you—"

           “Babe, I wish you could but it doesn’t work like that. It’s not even really supposed to work like this but Cass is pulling some strings. I only have until your subconscious realizes what’s going on and kicks me out.”

           “What? How?”

           “The separation between living and dead is a little bit thinner when you’re asleep. It’s actually pretty cool but it’s going to take a while to explain.”

           “Okay, right, got to be fast. Fuck, I miss you so much.”

           “I miss you too, kid. More than I can explain. But listen, baby, I’m so proud of you for making it this far. It’s going to be okay, I promise. Sam will take care of you, and I know you’re taking care of him the best you can. I don’t know how long I have until you wake up. I’ll keep trying again to come to you, but until the next time I get to see you, my firecracker, you’re so tough. You can do a lot worse than Sam, and I would never, ever hold it against either of you. I’ve been trying to send that—been trying to ram my head through this fucking door about a hundred times by now actually—but if it hasn’t been coming through strongly enough, I’m sorry. I can’t imagine what the fuck I’d be doing if it had been one of you—probably would’ve drunk myself to death by now to be honest—so the fact that you’re so worried about whether necking is going to raise my soul from the depths is actually sorta sweet. Love is complicated and the lines get blurred; I get it, especially now with some damned perspective. As long as I’m still going to be your guy when you get here, that’s all that matters to me. You’re it for me, kid.” He traces a light finger down the side of your cheek and it sends an ache straight into your stomach, makes him look lost for a beat as he takes you in.

           “Dean, I love you. I can't—I can’t even tell you how much I love you. I never got to say thank you for all the things you—”

           “Hey,” he says, grabbing your chin and holding you still to flick his gaze between your eyes. “I know. There’s no time. You don’t have to say that to me, I know. I always knew. I’m going to try to get to Sam too, but he’s—the angels are shocked at the shit that’s happening in his brain. Makes sense, you know, after everything he’s gone through, but I guess it makes it harder to slip through the cracks. But here: if I can’t do this again; if this is the last time I talk to you until you get back to me, I love you, and I’m going to keep loving you no matter what. The two people I love most in the world being together could never be bad to me, and I will alway—”

           And you woke up.

-

Continue to Dreams, Chapter 9

Thanks again for reading! If you liked it, check out my Masterlist or send me a request!

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And as always, if you want to be on my taglist, were on the taglist and changed your handle, or I lost track of it, please let me know!

[jeontaehui]

nananananana (210331 VLIVE)

taehee bites back a grin as fans enter the live. “hello everyoneeee,” she greets softly, her cheekbones lifting into a soft smile. “i’m in the practice room once again.”

“i was just learning a dance actually, it’s my break right now so this’ll probably be short,” she mentions. “and then i turned on vlive without asking permission— well, i did ask permission after i... turned it on,” she giggles. “she’s gonna say yes anyways. no one can say no to me,” the comments section blows up after she sent a sly wink to the viewers. she knew her effect on them one way or another. 

mark lee i love you HELLO THE TITLE?? IS THIS A SPOILER???

lee donghyuck’s long hair i only entered the live but i feel like crying T—T why must she be so cute

taeyongbub taehee in the practice room is so attractive??? wth???

taehee tucks a few strands behind her ear asking, “did you guys have dinner already? have you guys eaten?”

mataechan what did taehee eat today?

hyuckschurros PIZZA !!!!

“aw, pizza? i’m craving now,” she shortly puts on a pout before a smile shows itself once again. “i haven’t eaten but i think i’ll have........ um,” taehee seems to think for a moment as she looks up the ceiling, trying to remember what jungwoo said she’d have at the dorms.

“i can’t remember,” she shrugs, proceeding to continue reading the comments.

jungwoo tehet are you going to dance again?

aussiechan TAEHEEEE !!! come home to australia :(

svtzen DREAM SPOILERS PLEASEE

“the dance that me and my teacher did today was to party favors by tinashe! i have to practice some more to get it right but i’m,” she stands up and dusts off her track pants, placing the phone on the floor in front of the mirror, “going to show you guys the part where i’m most confident in.”

she disappears as she goes to the side to play the music, and the strong beats of tinashe’s party favors fills the practice room. she adjusts her pants around her waist and runs a hand through her black hair, ruffling her bangs for a moment before getting into position.

she dances. no matter how hard-hitting the choreography is, taehee knew well how to control her own body, and gracefully yet powerfully sync her movements to the beats.

taehee marry me she’s so hot what the heck do i do

markcity i’m single for this reason only

fullsunnn THIS IS WHY WE NEED A TAEHEE SOLO ASAP !!!

from the corner of her eye, taehee sees her dance instructor imitate the part where she got the dance wrong during their practice, causing her to lose focus and burst into laughter.

ncityinthehouse everyone, the duality of miss jeon taehee

“unnie is laughing at me right now!” taehee giggles. her eyes glance to the side then back to the screen. “yes so, until there did i memorize the dance. i’ll try to post on instagram the full version of it. oh!” she claps her hands excitedly, a habit nctzens took note of before she says an idea.

“since it’s a wednesday today and! the end of the month, you guys can comment whatever you guys want me to do or any question you want to ask and i’ll answer them.”

“i’m going to scroll with my eyes closed and whatever my finger lands on will be picked,” she cutely asks if the viewers got it before briefly explaining what she just said in english.

“i’ll give you guys maybe 30 seconds? is 30 seconds enough? okay, ready and start!”

taehee bobbed her head as she counted the numbers in her head. “30! okay, i’ll close my eyes now.”

juhfahm skincare routine?

merrymark give us a phone tour :D

twiceyeon please watch switch to me by dahyun and chaeyoung !!!! <3

“from twiceyeon,” taehee reads, putting her emcee mode on. “please watch switch to me by dahyun and chaeyoung! ohh i think i’ve seen this on my recommended but i haven’t had the time to watch it— sorry, chaeyoung-ah,” she winces.

you can hear keys being tapped on taehee’s phone screen as she typed the title on youtube’s search bar. the music video appears a few seconds later and she immediately clicks on it.

“oooo dahyun-ssi is very pretty,” taehee says. her expression quickly changes when she sees the twice member use her foot as she played the piano, her hand going up to cover the giggles that escaped out of her. “this is so cool,” she beamed.

“oh sexy!” taehee exclaims after chaeyoung appeared. “i really like chaengie’s short hair.”

she compliments the set when the scene changes, a summer pool vibe replacing the vintage set-up at the intro. “the dance is cute too,” she mumbles.

she smiles at chaeyoung and dahyun’s playfulness in the music video before moving on to compliment her best friend again. “chaeyoung is seriously so pretty... whaaat!”

taehee continues to watch the rest of the video as she moves to the beat, occasionally letting out a chuckle or two at the adorableness of the duo.

“hold on,” she grabs her earphones and plugs them into her phone. “(it’s) to avoid copyright,” she smirks.

taehee finishes the music video with a grin on her face, “the music video was very cute! did they perform this on stage? i think the stage set and the fits would’ve been pretty.”

“speaking of music videos, baekhyun hyung’s new album just dropped yesterday! have you guys watched the music video?” taehee shuffles closer to the camera to read the comments. almost everyone was saying that they did, in fact, watch the music video and really enjoyed it.

“i never said this directly to him but i really am a fan of his, seriously,” she dictates. taehee breaks into a grin as she giggles again, the viewers watching how her eyes twinkled while she talked. “‘bambi’ is really great— it’s immaculate. you guys should stream the whole album and recommend it to your family and friends. baekhyunie hyung never fails to deliver (good songs).”

bbhubblegum taehee promoting baekhyun and other artists better than sm pt. 74628392

going on her phone, she mumbles, “and i really like the choreography of his songs.” there was an adorable pout to her lips as she spoke, much to the amusement of the viewers.

then she looks up from the device in her hands and her eyes hold a certain glint in them before she playfully squints. “just be quiet about this though. i am never gonna hear the end of this from him,” she shakes her head with an amused chuckle, recalling all the times baekhyun teased her and the ‘admiration’ she has for him.

“you’re my only bambi bambi,” taehee sang effortlessly. “it’s a perfect night for you,” her tone was a little softer this time.

“okay so that was our first request? dare? of the live, let’s get to the next one right away!”

taeheeroar do you listen to the neighborhood?

wooyoungification do you want to collab with anyone? if so, who?

“the next one is.... wooyoungification! ooo wooyoung-ah hello,” taehee says, prolonging the last syllable of her sentence. “they asked, “do you want to collab with anyone? if so, who?”

“well,” she clears her throat, furrowing her eyebrows as if she were in thought. “there are a lot of great artists out there. taylor swift is already my answer by default but,” she giggles again, “if i have to think of people outside sm, i think it’d be nice to have a collab with stray kids’ 3racha. they’re their producing unit if i’m not mistaken. it’d be fun to work with them.”

“i also had this dream of having a collaboration stage with the other dancers outside nct, like blackpink’s lisa or seulgi unnie. would you guys want that?”

midzyseason this isnt good for my gay ass

reveluvbar can taehee just take over sm

taehee hums, “i think i never mentioned it before but i wanna try doing drama ost’s too. i don’t watch as much dramas as i do before, but when i was still learning korean, they helped me so much.”

“i watched ‘guardian: the lonely and great god’ a lot and i really liked ‘stay with me’. hopefully, i can collab with punch too.”

taehee unconsciously moves her lips to the side, forming another pout and thinks again. “from sm, i think kai hyung? not counting superm, okay?” she beams.

“kai hyung and,” then a snort escapes taehee before she could even stop it, “baekhyun hyung.”

she puts a hand to her chest once she recovers from her mini-giggling fit before holding it up and swearing it was the truth. “these two were the ones that came to the top of my head, seriously.”

beansprout lolll remember when kai used to “complain” about taehee ever only talking about sehun cause he was the one she was closest to in exo when they first met ?

sodangerous it’s so touching how taehee looked up to exo while she was still a trainee and now they’re like family

taehee nods and bites her bottom lip, asking herself, “why do i feel like a youtuber?”

she smiles to someone off screen and quickly glances back to the camera, “next question!”

asteroidsung what did you get for renjun’s birthday?

“what did i get for renjun’s birthday? i just gave mine literally yesterday. i know it’s summer but i gave him a hoodie that i thought would look cute on him,” she smiles. “it was pink.”

“i was with haechanie when i bought it.”

chenlezoned hyuck said he’s gonna marry daegal next month

“hyuck’s gonna marry who now?!” taehee exclaims, “DAEGAL’S A MINOR!!!”

dreamtopia BYEEEEEEE

themissingpuzzlepiece everyone at haechan marrying daegal:❓❓meanwhile taehee: 🌋🌋⁉️

boohoohyuck sending my prayers to lee haechan

just then, taehee’s phone suddenly rings and her eyes widen at the caller id displayed on the screen. “wow, this dude’s timing is really! spot-on.”

she puts the speaker on, “donghyuck-ah, what’s this i’m hearing that you’re marrying daegal?? are you leaving me and chubs already?! oh and you’re on speaker.”

fullseun don’t you just cry on the inside when markhee calls hyuck by his real name or fullsun

you hear haechan’s boisterous laughter first before he could answer taehee’s question. “i talked about that on vlive,” he said, “where are you?”

“i’m doing vlive.”

“but it’s almost midnight.”

when taehee makes no move to answer, haechan goes, “are you in the practice room again?”

“so?” taehee answers sassily, causing the boy on the other end of the line to groan.

“noona, we talked about this already,” haechan whines. “then we can talk about it again later!” taehee shrugs exasperatedly. “noona....” the former warns, as if he was scolding a child. “i’m just on a break,” she gives in, “i’ll go home soon.”

“promise?” taehee rolls her eyes, though it was clear that she was grateful for haechan’s concern by the soft smile she held on her face. “i promise.”

taehyuckles i know i wished for a taehyuck live but this will suffice Gosh they are so cute !!!!!!

“you haven’t said hello to czennie,” taehee reminds him. “czennie, hello!!” he greets sweetly.

“anyways, i just called you because you agreed to playing a few rounds with me but i’ll just wait for you until you get home,” taehee winces at his statement. she might have forgotten. “oh right, i’m sorry. just a few more minutes?” haechan hums affirmatively from the other end.

“get home safely, noonaaa,” after they exchanged their goodbyes, taehee hangs up the call.

“yes, okay! everyone that was lee haechan on the phone with me and i think i can do,” she turns her back to look at the wall clock in the practice room, “three more comments.”

yangqied taehee’s an idol in the day, pro-gamer by night

“okay, so our next question is: are you friends with aespa? yes! i am friends with aespa,” she beamed.

“i actually saw them the day before their debut stage. my time slot in the practice room was after theirs and so we met there,” taehee recalls. “they’re very pretty! and they look cool when they danced to ‘black mamba’. i wished them luck on their debut stage,” she chuckles.

taehee closes her eyes and proceeds to swipe at the screen, “next question is... oh! i dare you to post on instagram. okay, let me find some photos and show you guys so we can all vote.”

“i’ll send them on bubble but i’ll show it here too in case you guys don’t have a subscription. that’s okay.”

markerlee tb to when taehee sent her pcs to bubble... she really said fuck capitalism !!!!

“okay, option 1: this one,” she brings her phone up to the screen, showing a picture of her with the bird filter on mac.

jisungbye I LIKE THIS ONEEE

kunniekunkun this one’s cute!!!

moloism markhee pls post ur photos with the mac filters im begging you

“orrrr this one,” she faces her phone towards the camera once more. she was sitting on the pavement with the view of the orange-pink sunset behind her, a mask concealing half of her face.

the127thsense everything just screams girlfriend material to me

deryqueen taehee, i am free this friday. i repeat, i am free this friday.

solhyuck i think you should post these as a set on instagram!

“what should i post on instagram? everyone choose between 1 or 2!” taehee tells them in korean, before switching to english. “you guys pick between the first one and the second one, and i’ll post it on instagram.”

oncezenni 2

flamboyanthyuck the second one!

ohmajesus i like the first one

iamjeno second pleaseee

“mm okay, most of you are voting for the second one so i’ll be posting that first thing tomorrow! and then i’ll just send the other one on bubble,” taehee puts her pinky finger up as she speaks, making a promise to the viewers.

“how many was that? two already?” a pout subtly makes its way on taehee’s lips and a few of her hair strands fell in front of her face, causing her to push them back as she huffed. nctzens found it adorable!

takeoffbesttrack can i kiss you.

“can you kiss me?” taehee presses her lips on the tips of her fingers before lightly tapping them on the screen. “i,” one of the corners of her mouth raises to a smirk, “kissed you.”

mahaecries GODDDD

tenvely you will be the death of me

deryqueen AGAIN TAEHEE I AM FREE THIS FRIDAY NIGHT !!!!!!!!!!

taehee giggles after seeing the comment section blow up and her dimples peek out from her cheeks.

“i’m gonna have to end this soon, guys. this is the last one, okay?”

haecity can you go live with markhyuck?

snoopyscoop do you have any more funny stories with jungwoo?

taromilktea did you see sungchan when he debuted as an emcee?

“did i go see sungchan when he debuted as emcee? nooo,” she frowns, “but i did call him on facetime.”

“he said he was nervous but i told him he’d do great! and he did, right?” taehee’s frown was quickly turned into a proud grin. “i watched a replay of it on youtube the day after. he was very cute.”

“i told him to just think of it like he was talking to us so he’s more comfortable, and he told me it helped a lot so i’m relieved,” she nods. “i sent him churros too!”

taehee shuffles closer to the camera and brings her knees close to her chest while she talks, “please support him! i know sungchanie’s glad to have received this opportunity that’s why he’s been practicing diligently.”

taehee reads a few more comments and smiles at the funny ones. the humor of nctzens never fail to make her smile. the memes they send during menpas are so hilarious that she can’t help but reply to most of them.

taeheespresident i guess she’s gonna end the live now? :(

jungwootehet it’s nearing 1 am and i still have school tomorrow...... whoops!

“i’ll have to go now guys, it was nice doing all this with you,” taehee softly mumbles.

“i like this idea of having you guys comment what you would want me to do ‘cause i’m able to connect with you guys more, i’ll try to do a live again soon.”

“the weather’s nice here in korea— well at least for me,” she chuckles, “it rained recently but it might be hot? in other places so please remember to stay hydrated and drink lots of water.”

“also wear your masks and keep social distancing! we’re not only trying to protect ourselves but we have to stop the spreading of it all so,” taehee gives another small smile at the camera as she reminds the people to be careful, “stay safe.”

after a few beats of silence, taehee speaks again. “okay so, until here is taehee’s nananananana live!” she sings while doing the infamous choreo of ‘go’.

empathy127 I KNEW IT WAS FROM GO !!!!

“good night! or good morning to those who are starting their day right now,” she adds, “goodnight! we’ll see you guys soon.”

taehee does her infamous ily hand gesture and winks at the camera before waving bye and ending the livestream.

[peeterparkr]

perennial;tom holland|ten.

chapter ten: aconite 

↳ flower meaning: [beautiful flower, poisonous] be cautious 

chapter summary: reasons to love, reasons not to and conversations that should be held. 

pairing: tom holland x y/n

warnings: it’s slightly angsty, slightly fluffy, the chapter begins at some point but will not be at that point, you’ll see

word count: 10.2K

SOCIAL MEDIA BEFORE THE CHAPTER:

masterlist & profiles  

nine: in which we get to know who Clark is

previous chapter next chapter   perennial masterlist.

perfidy  ( series masterlist)

wanna be tagged?

Hey guys! So as you might have noticed I took a break, school has been super demanding and honestly I wasn’t as eager to write this, kinda lost motivation to write perennial because it got too demanding and honestly, well you know it... But I’m back on track! I hope you like this chapter, it’s slightly different. 

Sometimes life is ironic, like winning the lottery after you die, or meeting the love of your life and finding out they’re married, or rain pouring down on your wedding day. 

Ironic by Alanis Morissette had been the first song that had played when they’d arrived to that bar, James remembered. 

Ironic. 

But the most ironic thing to y/n at least was Dancing Queen being sung in the background by two—no, three drunken girls, the bright notes buzzing, as they were too boozed up to hit any kind of decent note or any kind of lyric. It was ironic, as y/n was trying to hold back the tears as she rushed through the dancing crowd, a very unaware crowd, that was sweating and dancing and cheering and singing to the beaming to the cheerful song as she tried to swim her way through to finally get outside. 

Y/n knew Tom and her had never been fine. It just wasn’t a word in their relationship vocabulary. It was usually chaos. Like what it felt at that precise moment. She knew that Tom and her were chaos, that was true. But this. 

She couldn’t breathe. 

It was something she already knew would happen, eventually, though it’s stupid to walk into a relationship knowing you’redoomed.  It must have been a figment of her imagination. What she had seen. And on her birthday. Her very own birthday. 

But it wasn’t. 

She hadn’t imagined it. 

But what exactly had led to the chaos? Why had it come so easily? Everything had been particularly lovely. 

But of course, she knew that the fact she was crying outside a stupid bar trying to catch her breath, as she could still hear the faint music from the inside was no coincidence and was no surprise. Her sorrow had had a beginning and this chaos had been building up since James’ arrival, this was the ending she definitely didn’t want. 

Not that it had to do with her brother per se, but it came from that moment. Or maybe she was just trying to blame it on someone else rather than on Tom. 

She did blame it a bit on James. 

“Y/N, here you are,” James said as soon as he had walked out of the bar. “It’s—“

“I don’t want to hear it right now,” she stated before looking up to see her brother. “I know it, James—“

“Y/N—“James wanted to calm her down. “I” 

“I know, you told me so-”She snapped. “I fucking know that. Go and search for your fucking boyfriend that’s the only think you care about-” 

Clark had walked out as if he knew he’d be mentioned. Clark had arrived days before, apparently James announcing his engagement hadn’t exactly been to share it, but rather a warning to y/n. 

“Y/N, are you alright-” Clark had tried to ask. 

“No, get out of my face, I need to… Where the hell is Emma?” Y/N didn’t mean to snap at him but she couldn’t care any less. 

“It wasn't him,” Clark had tried to say. 

But it had been. However, y/n guessed she knew what he meant. 

“I don’t want to hear it,” she said. “Could’ve been any other day but no, everyone fucking decided to ruin my damn birthday, I didn’t even care about it! I just—Need to leave.” 

“But I’m sure Tom—“

And even though y/n knew it wasn’t... it felt...it had hit too close to a feeling that she was too familiar with. A deja-vu if one must say. A nightmare that she had once forgotten. 

Of course, nobody did understand why she had reacted that way.

Correction, they did. They would expect her to react that way because what she’d seen had been hell. But they didn’t understand what she truly felt. Maybe Sam, probably Sam. Who had seen her all those years back, way too long ago. Yet it seemed like just yesterday. But Sam had seen a very different y/n back then...Not stronger but a y/n that kept her feelings. Not like this, running away from it, wasn’t y/n supposed to be stronger now? 

He guessed that reliving it wasn’t easy, especially by what came afterwards. There was a slight difference this time, however, huge difference, actually. 

Tom did run after her, and he was probably still searching for her.  

“You don’t get it,” y/n said. “I—I need—It just felt—It felt just like that time.” 

James saw Tom rushing out of the bar, too. He pitied Tom for once this week. 

This wasn’t Tom’s fault… allegedly. Technically, it wasn’t. Now, if you look at the background of course he was to blame and he was an idiot, but this was something that James… could understand. He could, in a way, team up with Tom. 

James knew this would eventually happen. This chaos was ticking and it was only a matter of time till the chaos exploded. 

Relationships are complicated, but they’re bright most of the time. When two people are in love what else can you do about it?

James knew it, love was a bitch and love can make us do impossible things. Some people often confuse love with possession or love with passion or love for a caprice. James was particularly scared y/n would confuse love with a memory. 

Love shouldn’t hurt. That’s why he was probably too worried about y/n. And too angry at Tom for making a fool out of his sister. He, however, was impressed by that. But not really since James knew that from a very young age y/n was stupid enough when it came to Tom. But to make a fool out of y/n when she was the one to almost usually keep her sanity? 

James was impressed by how easily it was for Tom to make y/n go stupidly crazy when it came to him. Even now, he had been so impressed by his sister’s stupid infatuation. James did, however, like that Tom managed to get that smile he hadn’t seen in a while.  But she looked very stupid while at it. 

Tom was an idiot, too. Y/N also managed to make Tom the most stupid man on the planet. Not that he needed help with that, though. 

However, just as fast as Tom could make y/n smile he could be just as fast to break her heart. Most of the time he didn’t mean it, and James was sure Tom didn’t mean to this time. 

It’s the backstabbing disadvantage Tom had for being an idiot. 

James had been one of the few people who had seen the true nature of their relationship. He had indeed noticed Tom was so foolishly in love with y/n from an early beginning and he had been the one to point it out when she was just a kid. He wished he hadn’t because the moment y/n had heard him say those words, she had turned into a very stupid little girl. 

He had, however hinted it out to Tom, several occasions, that he did notice. 

“Y/N looked pretty, huh?” He had asked once after seeing the boy blush. 

“Breathtaking much, Tom? Please close that mouth.” 

“You and y/n looked awfully good together in those pictures from prom.” 

“Stop staring at my sister, eyes up here buddy.” 

James did notice. Tom had even once told James about it. In his own way. 

“I don’t actually hate your sister, not really.” 

But he didn’t quite understand why they acted like that. Why had they been so full of pride to admit they were in love with each other? How bad would it be for both of them to admit that their eyes followed each other? Why did it hurt them so badly to admit they made each other blush and smile? 

James had seen it after y/n came back from Rome, from both sides. Y/N would hum songs, Tom would be smiling more. 

They’d be talking. Not fighting. Even laughing together. 

And James had seen that this week, and he had been proven wrong. They truly were in love, even after all, even after everything. He could see them both, trying to fight for each other, the simplest of things he’d seen like Tom pushing y/n’s hair back if she was reading the script and it bothered her sight, or y/n gently squeezing Tom’s arm when she saw he was nervous about directing. Or both of them giving each other a look, with probably an inside joke of theirs or as if they were speaking with only their sight and then looking away and smiling to themselves. 

They were in love, and James knew it. James knew love. 

Love for him was Clark. 

His damned secret, kept for too long from y/n. He would’ve kept him a secret for longer, not because he was ashamed, and not because he didn’t like him. But because… Clark was something so personal for James and sharing him meant losing their intimacy. 

Clark and James were fine by themselves, they didn’t need anyone intruding in their relationship. 

Clark is the love we all dear and yearn for, the kind of love you only see in movies in the background, nor even the main characters, just the one perfect couple that’s always in the cafe, quietly smiling at each other. The kind of love that’s cozy, and that though it may be troubled sometimes, it’s truthful. The one love you never want to give up.  

He’d seen the way Tom looked at y/n, it reminded him of the way Clark looked at him. 

Maybe that’s why he wanted to side with Tom this time. 

James was getting married and though it might had come to a surprise to y/n, he knew that if he were to tell Tom, Tom wouldn’t be surprised at all. 

Tom had introduced Clark to James. Maybe he owed him for that.

“This guy, I swear, he’s the perfect catch for you, you’re gonna thank me one day, maybe on your wedding day,” Tom had said with mischief. 

“You know you don’t have to introduce me to every gay guy my age you meet,” James had sassed. “Besides, where did you meet him—?” 

“Golfing, his dad—“

“Oh, he golfs? Hard pass, I hate guys who like golf,” James had cleared. “Pretentious idiots.” 

“Hey!” Tom had frowned, “no, but he doesn’t golf, he hates it, but his dad dragged him along so that’s why I think he’s perfect for you! I swear I had two words with the guy and I—“

“No.” 

“I already gave him your number.” 

He had hated Tom at that point but… he guessed he was very thankful for that and that’s why maybe he was having such a hard time trying to convince himself that Tom wasn’t meant to be for y/n, because if Tom had been so right about Clark, how wrong could he be about y/n? 

James wanted y/n to have a Clark. And though, he had initially loved the idea of Tom and y/n, he now saw how it could end up so badly if they didn’t get rid of the baggage, which was unmistakably very heavy for both of them to ignore. It's baggage that’s been built from years now. 

Baggage that James and Clark didn’t have, because they always talked it out. Baggage that had shown up at that very particular night. 

But he had told y/n about it, he had warned her on his very first day in LA. 

“You’re getting married, oh my god,” y/n had said for what James was sure was the hundredth time. And she had been even more excited when she’d learned he’d be coming. 

“Yes, can we move on—“

“No!” She stopped him. “Why do you want to move on?” 

“Because—“he couldn’t quite explain it. Clark was his. He didn’t have to say anything else. 

“James!” 

“The same reason as to why you didn’t want to tell me about Tom,” James said.

“So you have baggage?” 

“Not—“James closed his eyes. “When you were—Back in Rome.” 

Y/N watched him. “Oh, because—it’s,” y/n understood about it. Love is between the people in love and that’s it. 

“Or—no, no, look, it’s—“James sighed. “I’m—it’s my thing you know?” 

“I’m your sister.”

“It’s not about not sharing it with you,” he rolled his eyes, “it’s about keeping him to myself, you know? To be lucky enough to know what we have.” 

“But—Clark? I thought you—I didn’t know—You said you hated the guy!” 

James glared at his sister waiting for her to see the irony. 

“No, my case is different,” she pointed out. “Tom and I-- well… You said you hated him!” 

“Well, I lied alright? I just never wanted to admit—I mean you knew I was dating him, why does this come as a surprise?” 

“Because you— hated him?”

“I didn't. I just didn’t want to admit that I fell in love with someone Tom introduced me to.” 

She looked away. “See? He’s not that bad. I mean he—he introduced you to him, he's not as bad.” 

“I know he isn’t,” James agreed. “But you have to talk to him.” 

“Everything was simpler when we pretended to hate each other,” y/n had said, melancholically staring at the ceiling as she had a flower pressed to her chest. “Maybe I—understand it, spreading it out is difficult.” 

James rolled his eyes. “Why is it so hard for you to tell him that you’re not okay?” 

“Because I feel like he knows already,” she admitted. “But we're trying to pretend we are  okay, so we… I don’t know, fake it till you make it.”

“Y/N—“

“I’m kidding, I mean—I guess we haven’t really had time to talk, we—We already kind of talked the Timmy thing which—“

James could tell y/n was the one who didn’t want to talk, they were very much alike in that matter. “The Timmy thing?” 

“He’s incredibly jealous of Tim,” she rolled her eyes tiredly, “which I don’t—It’s stupid.” 

“Is it, y/n, didn’t you tell me you slept with him?” 

“Yes but—I—Look,” she coughed. “It’s—Not something—I… I don’t know, when… I saw Cherry, I guess I wanted to get over him, but I can’t… I...it always comes back to him, you know?” 

James watched her, confused. 

“It’s funny, how we translated the bad parts into good ones, and I am so scared that I won’t get to say everything I feel for him for yet another chance…. And he is just...The love of my life, and it feels...there’s no other explanation for it, you know? He just is. And I look back and even though we were always fighting I just…” She took a deep breath. “And it did break me, the Cherry thing, him moving on with someone else just, I guess I wanted to move on, too, I thought… It’s gone, you know? Then he comes back and it’s another spark, you know? I just get out of my stupid senses... but I just did it because I couldn’t bear the thought that we are not meant to be.” 

James remained quiet. 

“And no matter what everyone says, I’d still choose him, you know? It’s so…” She cleared her throat. “So stupid, but then I just remember that feeling with us laughing and smiling and the...The first time he ever said he loved me I couldn’t quite… Believe it, you know? And it’s not… Gosh I hate that we are both so stupid but we’re doing our best, and he…I don’t know. Maybe it’s stupid but I think… I like to think we both missed waking up beside each other.” 

“That’s not love.” 

“No, I know, not that, but it is love, in our own very particular way,  but we’re so much more than that, yes the pieces are all scattered around, but I know I want to fight for it, and… I think our problem is we aimed too high or… I can’t help but be confused about the script you know? Because if it hadn’t been for it… I would’ve never had a chance yet it seemed like I… It’s a very delicate subject, but I don’t know, love is complicated, that’s it. But I love him more than anything.” 

James knew that y/n knew that Tom and her probably didn’t work out. She knew she’d broken Tom’s heart. It was no secret that y/n felt that  the worst thing that she’d ever done was breaking his heart. She knew that, and though everybody said it, she should forgive herself, she knew that it wasn’t easy. 

James didn’t know what to answer. 

“I don’t want to lose him.” 

“Yet you’re loving him as if you are going to,” James intruded. 

“You never know, and i think that’s the best way to love, love as if you’re gonna lose each other, then you know you’re really loving them…. Life has taught us both that we can screw up,” she gulped. “And I don’t know, I know...there’s a part of me that thinks it won’t last even if we try to, you know? But then again, I think about it and I know we’ll eventually end up together again. And I know I… look, I know I shouldn’t be saying this because I need no man but this time in L. A., I felt… numb, you know? And I guess I was sad because there was nothing holding us together, and… I would put on a smile every Friday, you know? Pretend I was okay, and I was healing of course, but I still had so much love left for him. Still do and I don’t want to let go of my chance. Might as well be happy, I’m tired of listening to me crying anyway.” 

Y/N did say ‘you know’ a lot, and James did know. Not sure how. 

“Why do you love him?” He asked. 

“He’s just too good to be true,” y/n smiled slightly, to herself. “I don’t—know, I just do, he’s the only one that gets through to me, and I feel alive when I’m with him,” she bit her lip. “I feel like I am a teenager all over again, but a good way, like when you’re excited about trying new stuff and excited about growing up, and being rebellious, and” she closed her eyes. “As cheesy as it sounds, I just lose all my defenses, but with him, I don’t feel lonely, he’s like… I don’t know, he’s just a song written by the hand of god.” 

James only listened. Y/N wasn’t… this, usually. Y/n never really said things like that. It was odd. 

“Y/N, that’s—“

“I know, I’m being ridiculous,” she blushed. “But I do love him. Because he’s—a moment, he is… I love him because I know him, and even with his flaws I completely love him.” 

“He’s an idiot, y/n, he slept with Cherry.” 

James didn’t understand it. Not really. Or not completely, for that matter. But he knew it. It was so complicated but he didn’t blame her, he guessed that y/n wasn’t a quitter, maybe that’s why she was trying so hard. And maybe she was right, and he knew it, Tom wasn’t that bad… But the fact he’d slept with Cherry was completely inappropriate. 

“I never thought I’d need him,” she admitted. “And I missed him, but I didn’t miss the heartbreak.” 

A broken heart can blind us. 

He’d seen Tom once back in London, and he wasn’t alright. Tom wasn’t doing fine with y/n being away, and with the heartache, his eyes always looked tired, and he was paler, and quiet. 

Tom was never quiet. 

And yet just as James had arrived in Los Angeles he’d seen a very different Tom, one with bright eyes and pink cheeks again. Like y/n, too. Her voice over the phone sounded off, always too distracted, or not there. Now she seemed… better, but still broken. 

James knew there was no use on trying to convince y/n and she had promised that she wouldn’t continue unless she talked to Tom about it. James knew she was so good at avoiding it. 

Y/N had taken James to set the next day and he’d seen them again, very different, very professional. He saw it in their eyes, though. Eyes looking to lock with the other and that shy smile. 

James had to look past that, as he saw his little sister’s dream come true, and he could tell that she didn’t quite believe it herself. And it was like seeing that little girl just from years ago with a hope and a dream and her always bossing the Holland boys around as she wrote a script for their home made movie. 

He saw them all like kids, Tom, Harry, Sam and y/n. It was like them being kids again. In a way. 

Now it was a real set, with real actors, a real movie, a real script and Harry was directing, he couldn’t believe it. Y/N and Tom were discussing over with some of the actors and Harry talked to the crew. 

James guessed Tom and y/n had a lot to say between the chemistry of the actors. He couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing, how they did work together, at least in the professional way, as Tom was directing them.

Did it hurt? James wondered as he watched Tom, directing Gregg, telling him how it should feel: 

“She’s the love of your life and that guy over there took the chance when you blew it up, of course you hate him, he’s the worst person in the world because… What makes him so bad is that… he is perfect for her,” James had heard Tom say. 

James had time to observe y/n and Tom. From afar and when y/n was not hiding. On that particular day when they were rehearsing that one scene when Valerie and Teddy were together, when they were supposed to be in love, dancing, all while William had to watch in the distance. 

Odd scene to see, considering his conversation with y/n. Did y/n have feelings for Tim still? Even if she assured she loved Tom? 

All of James' doubts were clearly erased as soon as he’d seen them.He’d seen them laughing with each other, shyly looking away, and y/n… giggled. 

Y/n giggled? 

It bothered him. Because it felt like Tom didn’t care, as if they’d simply erased it, in a way. But James was very aware that y/n was only bottling it all up, and y/n is dangerous, if she bottles too much she would end up losing control. 

James had seen them walk away together to have lunch, Sam and Harry had gone separate ways after but stayed far enough from them. Emma had joined James instead, they were close to y/n and Tom. 

Emma seemed sad. James couldn’t ask much about it, but from what he’d gathered from Harry, things weren’t going fine. Harry had only mentioned how it would take him a lot of time, that there was hope but that Emma just didn’t want to give in. But James could tell Emma did love Harry, and he admired Emma, her bravery and strength. She had to break off an engagement because her fiance wasn’t sure about it. Of course she wouldn’t forgive him that easily, Harry had been an idiot. 

James wished y/n was a bit more like Emma, y/n was too forgiving, and y/n was too stubborn and too blinded by the stupid boy to see it. 

James and Emma were eavesdropping, because both of them probably didn’t have a conversation themselves, and because both of them had gone close so they could hear, but hidden enough not to be seen. 

Nothing interesting about their conversation, the script, the set. Until...

“I was going to take you camping,” Tom mentioned out of the blue.

 Y/N had chuckled. “What?”

“Yeah,” he gulped. “For your—for your birthday.”

She grinned. “Camping?”

“Yeah,” Tom cleared his throat.

“That sounds so—cool,” y/n said, a bit confused by the idea. 

“But guess that idea is off the charts now.” 

She scowled. “Why?” 

“I am pretty sure your brother doesn’t want you alone with me,” Tom laughed nervously. 

James nodded in agreement to Tom’s statement as Emma tried to hide a snicker.

Y/N sighed, rolling her eyes, shaking her head and letting out a very forced laugh. “He’s an idiot.” 

“No, no, I—I understand it, you’re his little sister and he’s always been very protective.” 

“He hasn’t,” Y/N chuckled.

“Oh, he has, even I know he had a talk with Tim,” Tom hissed the name. 

“What?” 

“Didn’t you know? He told him that if he broke your heart he’d chop his dick off,” he assured her. 

James shrugged and looked at Emma. “And he didn’t,” James whispered. “Because Timmy is a good guy.” 

Emma scoffed. 

“I… oh my god, I didn’t know,” Y/N sounded embarrassed. 

Tom coughed. “I’m terrified of your brother.” 

“Good,” James mouthed to Emma. 

“Hm but what were you planning?” Y/N asked, getting back on the subject. “Camping, really?” 

“I dunno, rent a cabin, go for a hike, spend the day and night together,” Tom had changed his voice and gotten slightly closer to y/n. 

“Hm tell me more,” y/n had grinned. 

James motioned as if he was going to puke. 

“And I thought we could have time to ourselves you know? I know we work best when we are alone,” Tom had continued before getting his lips close to hers. 

“Hm we do,” y/n had closed the gap between them. 

“My sister’s an idiot,” James told Emma. “Why are you letting her do that?” 

Emma rolled her eyes, shaking her head. “I can’t stop her.” 

“And well I thought it’d be romantic,” Tom continued. 

“Hm why don’t we go?” 

Tom laughed. “And take your brother?” 

“We wouldn’t-” 

“We would have to, y/n,” Tom laughed. 

James nodded again. 

“But yeah that was my idea, you and me in the woods with no distractions,” Tom commented to y/n. 

“Hmm…” Y/n had leaned yet again to kiss him. 

James scrunched his nose, he really didn’t understand how Tom managed to get y/n so stupid. 

“You know, the cabin I had seen was really romantic,” Tom explained. 

“Was it now?” y/n blushed. 

“Yes, hm... it had a fireplace, and it was so cozy,” he continued. “And I know it’s not 80’s type of aesthetic you like—“

“No, no, shut up! I would’ve loved it, it sounds so romantic,” y/n had chanted. 

James was confused. “It doesn’t, ew,” he whispered to Emma. 

“It was,” Tom agreed with y/n. 

“And what were we going to do?” Y/n asked. 

James closed his eyes and shook his head. 

“Hm, there was a nice place to go hiking, uh, fishing, maybe? and you know relax, talk, get...cozy,” Tom continued. 

“Oh,so he was right?” Y/n asked. 

“Who was?” Tom frowned, confused. 

“James,” Y/n said. 

James raised his brows at the mention of his name.

“About what?” Asked Tom. 

Y/n giggled. “You were planning on giving me your—” 

Thankfully, Tom hadn’t let her finish the sentence. “You’re taking away all the romance out of it when you say it like that!” 

James wanted to die. 

Y/N laughed, loudly. “But were you?” 

Tom was embarrassed. “I—I mean it may have been on the schedule yes hopefully—I mean don’t say it like that, oh my god, y/n—But—“

“Was it on the schedule then?” Y/n asked. “How did you write it? Sex at 8?“

“No! No, I—it was—Not planned—I mean I wasn’t going to assign like a time but I mean it would I—kinda thought I—mean I knew—I assumed—“

“Oh, so you assumed it?” Y/N laughed. “So you just assumed I was going to ride you?”

James seriously thought he was going to die. 

“No, I didn’t!” Tom was red. “Y/n! I—I no!” 

“So you didn’t want to then?”

“Yes! But—I thought it could be an open possibility?” Tom was nervous. “I—“

Now it was y/n’s turn to not let him finish as she had already kissed him again. Emma was so entertained by the conversation and James’ reaction that she couldn’t hide a lighter for not longer. James lost it by then, so he quickly stood up and walked to them. 

Emma followed, curiously. 

The couple was still kissing. 

James cleared his throat loud enough for both of them to hear him and quickly separate. 

Y/N frowned. “James for god’s sake!” 

James walked over to them, “We are having lunch and I don’t see you eating, so Emma and I should join you.” 

“Sorry y/n,” Emma whispered to her friend. 

Tom and y/n were red, so, so red, and Tom was shaking. James only glared once at Tom before Tom moved away from y/n, just as James sat between them. 

“Your food is intact,” James pointed out. 

Tom moved away. “I—we were.” 

“No, Tom, eating my sister’s face is not lunch,” James cockily said. 

“James what the fuck,” y/n snapped at her brother. 

Tom laughed nervously. “James, c'mon man.” 

Emma felt awkward. “Why don’t we—eat?” 

They stayed quiet for a bit. 

“So, what are you guys?” James asked. 

Tom almost choked on his food. “What?” 

“James!” Y/N complained. 

Emma just smirked. 

“yeah, what are you? Have you guys talked about it? All your emotional baggage?” James pushed. 

Tom coughed. “We have been.. discussing it.” 

Y/N turned to Tom. “don’t answer” 

James smirked. “No, no no no, y/n, I wanna know.” 

Tom nodded. “What do you want to know?” 

“What is going on,” James reminded him. 

“I love your sister,” Tom answered. 

Emma watched between all of them. 

“Doesn’t answer my question,” James raised his eyebrow, as if challenging Tom. 

“James,” Y/N hissed. 

“I—it’s it’s true I am deeply in love with her and have been for a while now,” Tom said as if defending himself. 

“Are you a couple?” James asked. 

“Yes,” Tom said. 

“No,” answered y/n at the same time. 

Both of them turned to each other, with confusion. 

Emma blew her cheeks in. 

“Um… What did you think of the… I saw you guys were working on Jesse’s girl today!” Emma quickly intruded. 

James clicked his tongue. “No, wait Emma… This is interesting,” James continued. 

“What-” Tom frowned watching y/n. 

Y/N shook her head. “James can you please leave us alone.” 

“I… Well, I’m just confused, and I have more questions… A,  y/n why do you keep making out with this man if you’re not a couple I mean you can do whatever the fuck you want with your life but this man may I remind you has broken your heart and hurt you in so many possible ways—even broke your bones?” 

Tom coughed. “That was accidental... all of those.” 

James shook his head. “Eh, I haven't finished pretty boy, and b) why are you Tom, saying you’re a couple when you haven’t talked about it?” He pushed. 

Y/N glared at her brother. “James this isn’t any of your business.” 

Tom only clenched his jaw. 

“Uh, er… Guys, I’m gonna….” Emma had awkwardly stood up, “I’m gonna pretend they need me over there,” she announced before leaving. 

“You’re fucking insane,” y/n declared at her brother before storming off, following Emma, leaving James and Tom alone. 

Tom avoided his gaze. 

“I know you hate me, but-” Tom started. 

“I don’t, I care a lot about you and that’s why I’m doing this…” He said. 

Tom scoffed. “Oh, so you’re helping me out with this?” He glared. 

“I’m not,” James said. “But you perfectly know what you did to y/n, and I’m sorry Tom but you can’t-” 

“It’s between me and her,” he said. 

“But I know you both, and you’re both so stupid, Tom, for fuck’s sake, and you slept with Cherry,” James snapped. “I’m not letting that-” 

“Who told you?” Tom asked. 

“Doesn’t matter,” Jamessaid. 

“Did you tell her?” 

“Didn’t have to,” James said. “She knew it already. And if you don’t have the balls to talk about it with her, which honestly-” 

“I want to, okay?” Tom barked. “I can’t believe I did it but I want to work it out!” He snapped. “I thought you were fine with us!” 

“No, Tom I’m not—fine with this,” James explained. “And I can’t believe I’ve let you hurt her this much and I swear Tom she might believe you but I don’t-” 

“Look we want to talk it out, I mean it alright—your sister is the love-” 

“Love of your life! Then why have you been such an asshole to her?” James wondered. “Do you even know it Tom? How badly you broke her? After Rome? Do you even realize-” 

“Yes I do! And that’s why I bloody want to do things right this time, okay? I want to give her the entire world, alright? I’m not… I’m not joking, alright? I actually… I want to make it up to her, I’m… so in love with her, and I just want the best for her,” he said, gulping. “I…” He sighed. “Maybe we haven’t talked about it because we both know it’ll break us apart, alright?” Tom looked away. “And I just want her to know about it, everything, how she’s been my everything… Since we were children, okay… James you know me, you’ve known me my whole life and you know I’m not lying to you, I love her,” he sighed. “I don’t want to hurt her and I know I’ve fucked up. I just… I know it, it’s so hard, and I…” He gulped. “I guess… I know I slept with Cherry, I know, I did it, I’m not denying it, and I have no excuse but I… When I did it it was… I thought she had left to move on with Tim again because... “ Tom looked away. “I know it, alright? I’m not… good enough for her and you’ve shown me that, because you didn’t fucking act this way with Tim, and no one has said it with me, I know I’m the bad guy here, Harry doesn’t approve of me, Sam doesn’t approve of me, Emma doesn’t approve of me, you don’t… like me,” Tom gulped. “But I genuinely love her, and I know I’m a fucking mess, but… nobody knows about us, alright?” 

James clenched his jaw. No, it wasn’t alright no matter how many times he said it. 

“And it’s difficult to apologize, you’re right, I probably don’t have the balls for it, I’m a fucking coward, and I know, but I’m just trying to be honest with her, and with you, I genuinely want the world for her, and if I have to go back to the start then I will,” he sighed. “And I don’t know how to talk about it with her, and I don’t know if she feels the same way,” he took a deep breath. “And it’s killing me that I don’t know where she’s standing, and she avoids talking and I know how… She works, you know? She’s always been so reserved.” 

“The problem with both of you is you both think it’s you against each other,” James said. 

Tom looked up at him. 

“It’s always been that way, y/n against Tom, and I feel like you’re doing it again,” James said. “I am just telling you both, to realize it, it’s both of you against the problem not you against each other,” James said. 

Tom nodded. “I know that, and I’ve tried talking to her, but she… Ignores it, or someone comes in, or we have to-” 

“You’re searching for excuses,” James said, he seemed calmer now. 

“I’m not,” Tom said. “And I really mean it James, I don’t want to break her heart, I don’t want to hurt her anymore.” 

“And if she ends up hurting you?” 

“I’ll work it out,” Tom said. 

“Why are you directing this?” James questioned. 

Tom didn’t answer that, instead he took a deep breath. 

“If this is another one of your stupid plans—“

“It’s not, and not even a plan to try to win her back,” Tom explained, “it’s not—not like that. I want to give her the world,, and I know this—This whole thing is the world to her, you—you really underestimate me, Jay, as if I were some kind of stranger to you or to her, but—I’m not,” he repeated. 

“Maybe it’s time you both move on.” 

“I don’t want to move on, and—I tried, I—that’s why it happened, everyone said it: Move on, Tom, she’s just another girl… and fuck.” 

“She’s—“

“She’s not, I’m very aware of that, but even Haz and Harry said it, I fucked up, she fucked up, move on man,” Tom mocked their voices, angrily. “Just another girl, and, and I tried to… move on, thinking yeah, it’s only a stupid thought or whim, yes and I thought—if she’s really just another girl, then why the hell can’t I move on? how—Even other friends said, hey, you’re Tom Holland,” he let out a soft dry cackle. “a million girls are dying to be with you and—“Tom closed his eyes, “maybe it was that, me trying to—Trying to move on, but I don’t—want it, I don’t want another girl, James.” 

James only watched him. 

“And I’m telling you this not because you are her brother but because you’re my friend and I’m—I’m just—You know me, James, you know me perfectly and you’re acting as if you didn’t, yes I’m—I am an idiot, and yes I know I’m probably the worst option for her, and I probably tick every single bad box but—at the same time I’m—“ he gulped. “I just can’t believe how stupid I am, and I—I am” Tom meant it, James could tell. “When I’m with her, I feel like myself, and I don’t often feel that way, and she’s just this… incredible person. And I’m—terrified, I’m terrified of it. But I need her,” he gulped. “Not—in—I don’t know.” 

Maybe James needed to hear that from Tom. Though he still—James couldn’t forgive Tom. Even if it wasn’t his business, he could forgive him for breaking his sister. 

“And I’m very aware that I’ve lost her before because I know it, I’m an idiot, but maybe I’m too stubborn to admit that I lost my chance. Because I—I haven’t, alright? And this might be my last one but—I can’t admit it to myself, but I know about it, Jay, I know that what we could’ve had is gone so maybe just let me cling on to whatever we’re holding on until she decides to let me go, alright?” 

“I don’t understand why you’re both in a relationship where both of you think it’ll end up badly,” James had questioned. 

“You see, I’m trying for it not to end up that way,” he said, 

“But you think it’ll end, then?” 

Tom hadn’t answered him. 

“Why do you love her?” 

“She’s my home,” Tom shrugged as he quickly answered, he didn’t have to think about it. “I—I was always scared of growing up but it doesn’t hurt when I’m with her, when life is—getting too hard she was always there with those pair of old jeans and bright smile and yes, initially she was there to call me an idiot but she just made time stop, completely,” he shrugged. “Because she just—“ he smiled sadly, “she helps me find my heartbeat in the middle of all the bustle.”

James didn’t know Tom could be so poetic. But he meant it, or at least James hoped he meant it. 

James didn’t push it any further. After that, y/n had ignored him. Y/N was excellent at doing so, if she wanted to ignore someone she’d make sure they noticed. And she was angry at her brother. Besides when it comes to siblings, it feels even more personal and very immaturely done. y/n had ignored James and made sure to make him feel ignored. She would avoid his gaze, and she’d pretend she didn’t listen to him. 

She hadn’t even offered him a ride back to aunt Eliza’s. 

Tom had been the one to offer it. 

James had apologized to Tom, and he had only shrugged it off. 

“She’s your sister. I get it, she deserves the world, you’re only trying to give it to her.” 

Harry said he needed a beer, maybe they all needed one. 

Maybe James had to give it to Tom, y/n was one to ignore people and her problems per se. Tom had also ignored James, not like y/n, Tom was probably angry at James. James didn’t care for that. 

“I love the chemistry between Gregg and Auli’i,” Harry had said when they were at the bar, all of them beers in their hands. “They’re—really—“

“It’s too familiar,” Sam had laughed. “Very familiar.” 

“Not—there’s something missing,” Tom said. 

“Is it weird?” James asked. 

“What?” 

“Come on, the script?” James said. 

Tom shrugged. “It gives me a better understanding of her,” Tom admitted. “It’s—She really did write her heart out in there.” 

Harry watched between them. 

“What happened today?” Sam wondered. “I saw y/n storm off with Emma.” 

“I was a jerk,” James said, “to her and to Tom.” 

Sam and Harry side-eyed each other. 

“What’s going on with Emma?” Sam asked, quickly trying to avoid the subject. 

Harry squeezed his eyes shut, it seemed like an old bad joke hearing about it. 

“She’s… She says she’s not ready,” Harry said. “She just says she’s not ready, and she…” Harry took a deep breath.

“You two are the most stupid men in the world,” he said, staring at Tom and Harry. “You both come here, without giving them any warning, and you expect them to run after you? And don’t--Emma’s reaction is logical,” James continued. “But you have to understand that Emma came here to heal, Y/N came here for her dream, and you two came in barging just to shove it, the two men they came running away from just shoved in their way to say ‘Hey, y/n, I’m in charge of your dream now’” 

Sam took a log sip from his beer, with a big smirk. “Thank you, James, that’s what I’ve been telling them.” 

“But… Okay, yes, but you don’t know all the facts,” Harry sighed. “Look, if we hadn’t taken the project probably nobody else would!” 

James blinked. “What?” 

Tom looked away. 

Harry bit his lip, nervously, shaking his head. “I… We called the studio looking for her project and apparently there had been a lot of directors and producers rejecting the project,” Harry said. 

“So yes, we decided to barge in, and we said we’d be the stand in directors until someone showed up,” Tom explained. “We worked with the casting and everything and we’ve been behind the stage but we--And, I know that y/n never wanted us to be involved but the thing is it’s… It’s a hard project, and she’s unknown, and… It’s an amazing story, you know? But it’s… Films these days are all about superheroes, I should know, or too serious, and--It’s got potential, it’s got a lot of potential, and--” Tom sighed. “Maybe it was a mistake but at least this way we can be assured it’s get done her way. So at the end… we did accept the project because I’m just... “ 

Harry watched his brother and then turned to James. “Yeah.” 

James had really underestimated Tom, probably everyone did. Maybe that’s what Tom was so stressed about. 

“I do--” Tom clenched his jaw. “I might want to change just a few bits but I…”He looked away. “We’ve been talking about it with her, to make William more human, less of an asshole.” 

Harry nodded. 

“I think,” Sam shrugged. “Well, I don’t know much about films or whatever, but I think he’s human enough, and at least you understand it, I think y/n actually did a great job on him,” Sam continued. “I…think he even made him even way too nice,” he chuckled. “Like, there is a point where you understand why she loves him, I think, the story is built so you think you need to hate him but I guess the audience is supposed to fall in love with him as Y/N-- I mean, Valerie falls, hell, she even made me want to fall in love,” Sam laughed. “But I mean it’s purely fiction, in real life I don’t get how the hell she’s in love with you.”  

“Shut up,” Tom rolled his eyes, he had chuckled slightly, but James saw that Tom was slightly hurt by those words. 

James had read the script only once, he hadn’t really read it because he felt like he was reading y/n’s diary, which he had done once when they were younger, and she had been so angry at him. The script had felt like getting into y/n’s deepest feelings. He remembered a particular line which had stuck out from the rest. 

“I love him and I’ve run out of reasons to say why, I just know that  even when there’s no music playing we will find a way to dance.” 

Maybe Tom needed everyone to know the backstory, see past his actions. And probably y/n didn’t know this, James knew she’d get angry because she wanted to get it out herself, not be helped by him, make a name for herself, however in the industry it was difficult enough. But maybe it made sense, the reason why y/n loved Tom so much, because she didn’t need reasons to, she just did, and he kept giving her reasons to. 

“But….Emma, then?” James asked, trying to get back on the subject. 

 “Well… she slept with Josh,” Harry continued. 

“What?” Tom interrupted, angrily. “She did what?” 

“That night after the movie,” Harry bit his lip. “I-” 

“And you’re okay with that?” Tom questioned. 

“They’re not together, Tom,” Sam quickly said. “Besides, it’s most likely because-” 

“Because she was nervous about Harry coming here,” James ended the sentence.

Harry shrugged. “She was honest about it, and I mean--I don’t, I know she doesn’t love him, and yes, I was jealous but…” 

James watched Tom who nodded, knowingly. 

“I mean she chose a random guy to have sex with because she was stressed,” Harry nodded. “And she did tell me it meant nothing and I mean, it’s… It’s her body, she can do whatever she wants, and we… are not together.” 

“Where does one draw the line, though?” Sam questioned. “With rebounds, I mean.” 

James scoffed and shrugged. “It depends, on how soon, how the relationship ended.” 

“The whole, are we in a break or not,” Harry shrugged. 

“Yeah,” James laughed. “Classic Ross and Rachel, we are on a break type of situation, like, of course, they were on a break but it was too soon, because-- there are breakups that last for a day, y’know? The argument says it all, and right away… Gives the wrong impression, as if, I didn’t love you anymore so I hooked up with the first person I saw, either in spite or-” 

Harry nodded. “Yeah, also who it is with.” 

“Oh, yes,” Sam nodded. “Right, like.. If it’s with another ex?” Sam clicked his tongue. 

Harry scrunched his nose. “I think that’s normal, you know?”

“Is it?” Tom frowned. “Why would it be normal?” 

James saw it as an opportunity to defend his sister, not sure whether Tom knew it or not. “Because it’s something familiar,” James said. “Like, you don’t have to search for something you might not like so just go to someone who once you know… Knew you.” 

Tom coughed. “But like, that should mean they have feelings for them.” 

“Nah,” Sam tossed a few fries into his mouth. “Well, depends on the ex, but like, if you’re only hooking up with them, I mean,” Sam rolled his eyes. 

“It could awake feelings,” James nodded. “But if you’re searching for an ex it means you’re not up for someone new, it means you’re stuck somewhere there and sleeping with an ex means not wanting to move on.” 

“And alright, if you-- You’re still dating Clark, right?” Tom asked. “If you broke up and he slept with his ex would you forgive him?” 

James scrunched his nose. “I mean,” he shrugged. “As long as he doesn’t sleep with any relative.” 

Tom opened his mouth to say something but then exhaled defeatedly. 

“Like, for example, Sam,” James said. “That’s crossing the line on rebounds.” 

Sam nodded in agreement. “Yeah, that’s… fucking up, by the way Cherry’s coming and well--” 

“What exactly happened between you both?” James questioned. 

Tom bit his lip, he took a deep breath as he tried to map his thoughts out, knowing that what he was about to say would change a lot of things. 

“We were friends,” Tom said. 

Sam and Harry only watched his older brother, probably nervous to the outcome of the conversation. 

“I--Well,” he sighed. “She said she wanted someone to show her around London and…” Tom shook his head. “I… Well, she did flirt since the beginning and I… I didn’t answer at first, but then…I was so angry, I… I thought about it and thought hey, I lost my chance and y/n ran back to Tim and she is probably moving on.”

“Why did you think she was moving on?” James questioned. “She literally told you she loved you and only you.” 

Tom took a deep breath. “I’m an idiot, and… I dunno,” he sighed. “I thought she would end up going back with Tim. 

Harry widened his eyes with surprise, awkwardly asking for a second beer. 

“I don’t know, I was heartbroken, I was stupid and… I missed her too much and I...And I felt lonely and and everyone here sees me as the bad guy, and I continue to be the bad guy, but she was someone new and someone who didn’t know me and she was... And then I saw Tim posted a picture and it was… Undeniable taken by her, you know?” Tom looked down. “And I… Well, that’s how they started last time, her taking pictures of him and I thought she would again and so in spite, or full of rage and so I tried to move on and the option was right there in front of me and Tim kept posting you know, and even if he didn’t say it I just knew it was y/n, and one day after way too many beers I finally gave in to Cherr’s flirting and it--”He squeezes his eyes shut. “And I told her that whatever happened, it didn’t have to mean anything I told her, no strings attached, no feelings and… it happened,” he sighed. “And I….But it didn’t feel… I don’t even remember how it happened and I just didn’t feel good with it, it made me feel even worse and lonelier and then she kept wanting to hang out and I just shut her out because it was a mistake and then, I thought I was a rebound to her as well, she had just broken up with her girlfriend and I thought I was just a rebound but she then… Showed more and I just… Gave her no explanation, not… I don’t know, I told her I wasnt in a good place and that I was still in love with someone else and that wouldn’t change and yes, I’m the asshole again and…” 

All of them stayed quiet. What were they supposed to say? 

It was ironic, how both Tom and y/n had assumed they’d move on, and the reasons why they did it, both of them sleep with an ex and a relative, because both of them assumed the other one would move on. Why? Maybe that’s why they were so stubborn right now because both of them realized neither did and they probably never would. As if they were just happy to find out they still loved each other but were too afraid to admit it out loud. 

They remained quiet. 

“Eh,” Sam had cut the silence, too awkward for him to handle. “Not that I don’t want to talk about a conversation that will probably end up giving Tom a mental breakdown, and don’t get me wrong I love having awkward silences,  but I need… I need to know, Jay,” Sam smiled. “May I know what’s that on your finger?” 

Harry and Tom finally landed their sight on James’ finger, a silver band wrapped right around his left ring finger.

“Hm?” James quickly hid his hand. 

“Is that an engagement ring?” Harry questioned with a smirk. 

“Uh-” 

“Wait, uh--” Tom shook his head to shake away the sad feeling. “Are you engaged?” 

“To Clark?” Harry asked. 

Though he didn’t want to talk about it, he knew that the other conversation wasn’t for him to know. The other conversation was something Tom had to work out with y/n, which, yes, the reason had been very stupid, y/n had to work out with Tom how Tom felt about Tim. 

Probably James and everyone else did, maybe they really had made Tom feel unworthy of y/n’s love and that’s why he kept sabotaging himself. 

James did end up telling them, and he even finished the conversation thanking Tom for introducing him to Clark. Of course he didn’t have to tell them all the details, they were three straight men too stupid to care, and James was grateful he didn’t have to share as much, because it was his story, not anyone elses to know, it was his relationship and it was his Clark. 

James had, however, explained to them that Clark would come, too, James was slightly nervous about it, given that he knew that y/n was definitely not going to be welcoming and that she’d keep ignoring him. That’s how y/n worked with James, no matter if he tried to apologize, she wouldn’t talk to him. 

James knew he had made a mistake with this, but he needed to hear it from Tom, and though it wasn’t technically any of his business, he knew that Tom was more understanding, in his own way, than y/n. 

Tom could talk to James, that’s the difference, and Tom hadn’t talked to James for a while and so James didn’t know, and of course it drove him crazy not to know why or how this was happening. 

Tom, Sam and Harry all offered James a room in the house they were renting to stay there with Clark, he had accepted it because he knew Cherry was coming. 

James didn’t want to face Cherry. Because James had this one habit that he couldn’t ever get rid off, he was too nosy when he wasn’t asked, and he had talked to Cherry about Tom, and warned her that Tom was just too important to y/n. 

Y/N, as expected, kept ignoring James. But he had seen that Tom and y/n had gone out one night, alone, together. He had heard them walk into the house, and as much as he had tried to avoid eavesdropping, he had walked out, innocently to the kitchen and he’d seen them, on the couch, talking. 

“I think we need to add a scene,” Tom had said. “It’s… important.” 

“But… I don’t get it,” y/n said. “You want me tro write another one, I thought you’d said it was too long.” 

“But this one is important y/n, it gives… backstory to William.” 

“So you want me to make something up? Just to….”

“Yes, I told you, William searches for her after the whole London thing.” 

“But that didn’t happen,” y/n said. “And that’s why Valerie-” 

It seemed, Tom had told James, that Tom had found a loophole to talk without talking. Tom had explained to James that y/n would be avoiding the conversation, that didn’t surprise James. But Tom found a way to use the script to go over it, Tom had told James that they hadn’t really talked much but he had figured how to make them understand each other. 

“It did happen, so let’s add this scene, right before Jessie’s girl scene, I need it,” Tom said. “And I talked about it with Harry and he says he wants it, too.” 

“So he searches up for her? And then what? She shuts him out-” 

“She’s not the one answering the door,” Tom explained. “But William does go to mend things and then T… Teddy opens the door.” 

y/n had stayed quiet, as James was still wandering in the kitchen. 

“James will you please leave?” She asked her brother. “I won’t continue this conversation until you leave, I know what you’re doing.” 

He had left, but at least they had opened a conversation. He had seen them the very next day, asleep on the couch, so peacefully y/n laying on top of him. She had woken earlier than him and seen James in the kitchen. 

“Good morning,” James had said. 

“Morning,” y/n had answered sheepishly, as she stretched out. 

“Oh, are you talking to me now?” James had asked. “I made tea.” 

“No,” y/n had said before getting a glass of water. 

“I’m sorry,” James said. 

“No, you’re not,” Y/N answered. “You got it your way, didn’t you?” 

“I just want the best for you,” James said. “Have you talked already?” 

“About some things,” y/n said. “But it’s none of your business, as you said it before, it’s like Clark for you, Tom is mine, and my relationship is mine.” 

“So there is a relationship?” James asked. 

“There’s a hope for one,” y/n said. “And yes, I fell asleep on him, and yes, I keep kissing him but I simply want to, alright?” 

As soon as Tom had woken up and walked up to them, probably sore from the couch too as he was stretching out his arms, y/n ran over to him and gave him a passionate kiss, probably a very dumb way to prove to her brother that she was being rebellious. 

And if that hadn’t been a message clear enough, she’d flipped James off before walking away. 

“I’m--” Tom probably wanted to apologize to James but was still left too dumbfounded with the kiss. 

“Don’t,” James had rolled his eyes. 

That kind of behaviour continued, y/n trying to prove something to James. 

Cherry had arrived three days before y/n’s birthday, and Clark had arrived the next day after she did. 

They hadn’t had any contact with Cherry, not James at least. James was too busy exploring LA with his fiancé. It felt weird saying it. 

“Fiancé.” 

Y/N didn’t know Clark was in town, but as soon as she learned it, she had seemed to forget she was angry at James. She’d met Clark before, of course she knew of his existence  and that her brother was seeing him, they’d met but y/n had learned from James’ pasts relationships to not get too attached because ‘James changed couple more often than he probably showered’, which was too different from y/n, and y/n, though she had noticed about Clark, and though she did mention it from time, to time, James had tried to avoid it, because he’d finally fallen in love and he didn’t know how to act around it. 

Clark, however, had shown up to Harry’s engagement party, and that hadn’t gone well. Of course James was skeptical of showing his family, and the Hollands because he… Well, he didn’t want Clark to think they acted that way. Of course, that’s why he was reserved. 

Tom had been the one person who had had contact with Clark. 

Clark had said it to James once, “Tom is deeply in love with your sister.” 

“They hate each other,” James had answered. 

“No, if he did hate her he wouldn’t pay that much attention.” 

Clark was right, obviously. Clark, actually was someone who liked to observe and he was the one to calm James.

As soon as Clark was in town, he had listened to James’ stress and said: “She’s been in love with him her whole life and the dude, too. And you’ve said it, y/n tends to save it all for herself.” 

He was right. But James still thought that y/n and Tom had to talk about it, otherwise the chaos would come, but maybe it could wait. 

But y/n’s birthday arrived. 

Although the chaos was supposed to be coming, James wouldn’t have guessed it would come this way. And he wouldn’t have guessed it would come that way. 

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