#I stopped the habit because I moved like three times in a year and mailing became very difficult

[uldahstreetrat]

musing to myself this morning about the idea of penpals in fantasy settings like XIV

I miss my penpals from college, we used to send each other tea and plant clippings and little drawings (several of which I keep hung up by my desk space yet), and it makes me wonder what that would look like in Eorzea - there IS a mail system, after all, and I wonder what people include for their friends in different places

do you think dragonets would find penpals? interacting with the wider world at large by learning to hold a pen and scribbling away in a language they don't totally understand?

I think I'd like having a little dragon penpal. I wish we got mail from the characters we've met in the past

[solitary-cutie]

Darkness to our light. Part II

Part I

Part III

Part IV

prompt: you and coriolanus are married, it's unbearable for you, but it will all end soon

contains: dark, manipulative, controlling coriolanus. fem!reader.

And so you are sitting in the living room waiting for the only person ypu could talk to - the piano teacher. Sharing with desire to continue your once neglected studies, Coryo did not fail to fulfill whim of his better half and help Her. He would always help, even without asking. No matter if you needed this intervention. He would spend all the money on your wants without even mentioning it, as if forgetting, deliberately ignoring any checks in the stores, but you clearly knew that this wastefulness was another yoke around your neck, because one should be grateful. Especially if the checks came in the mail, and the history of purchases served him in calculating the spending for the month.

“Hello. Hey, you guys quiet today? Helpers’s a bit tense today. Not even tea! Can you believe it? Didn't offer! - The teacher laughed, putting out a folder with notes, a pencil, an eraser and an orange leather notebook from her bag on the snow-white piano.”

“Oh yes, He's planning a dinner party, everyone's getting ready. He's inviting coworkers, his sister. He's looking forward to the promotion.”

“Oh, wow. Who's coming from yours?”

You didn't say anything, was ashamed of yourself. “No, it is his night.” Silence. “Maybe you'll come?” Open hope in the voice of her student, almost her age.

“When? I had plans, but I'd stop by.”

“It starts at 7:00. I'll be waiting, you know! You can come when it's convenient for you.”

A weightless touch, as if you'd brushed something off the back of her hand. You ran your eyes around the room. He's not home. The teacher softened.

“Okay, I'll try.” She finally sits down on a nearby chair. “Come on, show me how you've been practicing. Have you tried to put both hands together yet?”

“I tried, but no luck.”

“Did you play the metronome?”

“Yeah, I got more confused.”

“All right, I'll do the math. Go ahead. E-e-e, one and, two and--“

The game began, with mistakes and quick, hurried edits.

“You've changed.” Said the teacher, stopping counting out the rhythm, because the student was already helping herself with the silent movement of her lips.

“He says the same thing to me.” She chorused the rhythm.

“You're not so much flirtatious, laughing. The author's depression? When was the last time you sat down at the pen?” She smiled.

“I miss it. Okay, wait, what's the best way to play this? I forgot.”

The teacher intercepted her hands and began playing the obscure part, counting out the rhythm aloud with intonation highlighting that "And three, And four, And one...".

“You're unhappy.”

“No, why?”

“That's not a question. I can recommend a psychologist, the best woman I know. She helped me let go of my resentments.”

“I'm not resentful.”

“Teach you to love yourself, so you don't deny those resentments, but accept them. Appreciate yourself, don't deny being alone, but accept being one with yourself. You are not alone, know you can walk away from where you want to walk away from.” The teacher did not realize how she had pushed the piano aside and how she had moved on to passionate speeches. She had been spared the resentment, but not the desire to save.

You looked around the room again out of habit.

“At least he doesn't hit you?”

“No, God, of course not.” You caught the doubt in her eyes and a second frown furrowed her brow. “No, seriously, I wouldn't stand for that. I'm not leaving him. I can't.”

“There's no word for "can't."

“I mean, what dictionary can I give you to back that up? I don't even want to leave. We are one and the same, and he won't just let me go. The only way I'm getting out of here is with my feet up. If I'm lucky and he dies before I do, I'll have a few years of pleasure.” She smiled, starting the composition from the beginning.

“In the left hand hurry a little. And how can you reason like that about a man you're married to? And if the children come, what will you do?”

“The later they come, the better, God forbid now.”

“Does he want them now?”

You hesitated, not stopping the game. It was embarrassing. Again.

“Well he hasn't talked about them yet, though I don't know how he plans to.”

“So even your body doesn't belong to you? You don't talk about your plans, not your plans, but his.”

“My soul doesn't even belong to me. Look, my arms are tired, can I take a little break?” Nod. “What's the best way to pedal here?”

“First learn to control both hands.”

Silence.

You wonder if you could call it a pun. If your body and even the imperishable substance of your being belongs to your husband, a white-haired angel raised in hell and invited into the ether of paradise, a world of powerful, fully-endowed people, will you be able to control what you lost access to on the date that the calendar refers to as the "Anniversary of Dating"?

The remaining hour of class passed in silence, resulting in the learning of a new sonata, even with the use of a pedal to stretch the sound, giving it a smooth flow from one bar to the next.

“I have a question here: when will you finally learn the bass clef? Will you stop signing notes?” The teacher mocked, marking in the diary the next lesson for January.

“It's a rhetorical question.” You looked at the Interlocutor. “Oh man, I don't like that bass clef, I can't memorize it. The only thing I know is what the C note looks like. That's it.”

“Don't forget the "B."

“Oh yeah, and then..." She made a long road to nowhere with her hand.

“And then let the Snow land on top.” He stood at the white archway that opened the living room, leaning lightly against the blue wall with gilded patterns and trees.

You shuddered, nerves to no avail, you were easily frightened, which could not be said of your teacher, - a girl strong-willed. Nevertheless, the fright laid a heavy stone on her heart, sinking it into her heels, and she dropped her pencil and, looking at him confusedly, hurried to pick it up.

“I didn't mean to disturb you, much less frighten you.” The ice-cold eyes flashed over each of the girls, burning their insides with cold.

Coriolanus knew you were partial to this pianist. From the first time you met her, He had noticed the glint in your eyes. Gross, He didn't approve of it, but He also knew it was certainly not worth worrying about. You amuse yourself as best you can from lack of socialization with Him. Yes, maybe you complain about Him, suffer, but you won't leave Him because you don’t want to. These reflections might have reassured Him if He had once experienced a semblance of even doubt, let alone anxiety.

“Ginny, my wife and I are organizing a dinner party tonight. We'd love for you to come.” His eyes darted to you, looking at your teacher. What will you do? If you start coaxing her “friend”, this conversation never happened between you, but if you walk up to Him and...

“What a great idea!” You whispered, flying up to your husband and hugging him by the forearm. He smiles, it all became clear, you had already invited her, but was it scary to ask Him? “I was afraid to invite Ms. Ring because of the possibility of rejection.”

Now you are on His side, snuggling up to Him to get hers. Manipulative. And who are you trying to bend to your will is unclear.

“Yes, of course, thank you for the invitation, I'd love to come. But I'm afraid I'm busy, so I won't be able to make it to the beginning of the evening.”

“I didn't tell you the time, in case you get there.”

You both looked at each other. The pianist was confused.

“Dinner starts at 6:00 or 7:00 in the evening. Ms. Ring apparently skips a lot of dinner.” She tried to put the question into an impromptu justification for the two of them, but it came out badly. The answer to his line didn't work anyway.

“It starts at seven o'clock, but knowing some of the guests, they'll be a little later.” He looked at his wife. “Play the new composition you've learned for me.”

“We haven't played it all the way through yet. We need time.”

“Play it.” Demand…

[triptuckers]

Two Homes (part 1/7) - Nikolai Lantsov

Request: nope! Pairing:  Nikolai Lantsov x reader  Summary:  you live in Ketterdam, and your life is alright. things get excited however, when you receive royal mail Warnings: none Word count:  2K A/N: first time doing a (mini) series and I am ✨ nervous ✨ but this idea has been sitting in my drafts for too long and I can’t stop thinking about it. I’m planning on writing seven parts :) enjoy reading!  PREVIOUS PART | NEXT PART TAG LIST: @godsofwriting @im-constantly-fangirling add yourself to my tag lists here 

You would always be torn between leaving Ketterdam, and staying in the city. You have a good life, it’s comfortable. Given that your father is one of the wealthiest merchants of the city, you could basically get anything you wanted. You had more money than you could possibly spend in one lifetime.

But still, you weren’t happy. Your father may have a lot of kruge, he certainly didn’t have a heart of gold. All your life you’ve known him as a greedy, rude and unfair man. You’d give up all of your kruge in a blink of an eye if you could trade it for a different life. 

Your friends didn’t understand. They told you to be grateful. That many would kill to live in a mansion like you do, and to have the amounts of money your family has. But you had learned wealth doesn’t always mean happiness.

For years, you watched as your father treated people like garbage, simply because they didn’t have enough money in his eyes. He’d blackmail people, or worse. You couldn’t stand it.

Which is why you decided to join the Dregs a couple of years ago. In secret, of course. Your father doesn’t know. You took every precaution necessary to prevent him from finding out. You’d rather not find out all the things he’d be capable of. 

With the help of the Crows, you’d been stealing small bits of your father’s fortune. You either give it to the Dregs or transfer it to your own personal bank account, one your father didn’t have access to. 

To keep your identity a secret, only a few Dregs know your true identity. You use a fake name and whenever you’re at the Crow Club or the Slat, you wear your hood pulled down as low as possible, hiding your face from curious eyes. All precautions because you know all too well what gang members would do with a rich merchant’s daughter. 

You like hanging out at the Crow Club. Mostly because the Crows don’t treat you like a merchant’s daughter. They treat you like, well, Y/N. To them, you’re one of their own. And you’re glad they’re your friends. 

The Crow Club is also a place where you can relax. At home, you’re always on your toes, keeping a close eye on your father. He had the annoying habit of marching into your room unannounced. When you told him you wanted a lock on your door, he merely laughed it away. 

So, yes, you’d prefer the Crow Club full of thieves, gamblers and other criminals to the mansion you live in.

Of course, your father doesn’t know you spend most of your time at the Club. You take longer walks, you make sure you’re not followed, and conceal your face whenever you make your way to the Barrel. 

Once inside the Club, you walk to your usual table, and there’d always be someone around to join you.

Right now, you’re sitting at the table with Nina and Jesper. Enjoying a drink and a game of cards. You’re happy to be amongst your friends, laughing at their jokes and beating them at cards.

You look up when you see a familiar redhead approach your table.

‘Hi Wylan!’ you say as you enthusiastically wave at him. Wylan smiles at you as he sits down next to Jesper. Jesper raises his hand at the bartender to order another round of drinks as Wylan shrugs off his coat.

‘I’ve got something for you.’ says Wylan, while looking at you.

You raise your eyebrows in question as you finish your drink. ‘Watch out, Jesper, I might steal your boyfriend.’ you chuckle.

‘Oh, no, you won’t.’ says Jesper, reaching out and pulling Wylan's chair closer to his own, making Wylan blush.

‘He’s going to ask me out on a date, I can see it on his face.’ you say, failing to keep a straight face. 

‘What? No!’ says Wylan, looking from you to Jesper. ‘No, I’m not asking you out on a date, I’ve got a letter for you.’ 

You frown. ‘You’ve got a letter for me?’ you say. ‘Why wasn’t it just delivered to my house?’

‘I don’t know.’ says Wylan. ‘Someone stopped me in the street and told met to give it to you. They said it was urgent.’

‘How did they know you knew where to find me?’ you ask him as you take your new drink the bartender passes you.

Wylan shrugs. ‘I don’t know. She had a pretty heavy Ravkan accent, though. I tried to read the address to confirm it was yours, but I couldn't.’ he says. You notice a slight blush on his cheeks, but ignore it.

‘Is the letter from Ravka as well?’ you say.

‘I think so.’ says Wylan, finally pulling the letter out of his coat pocket. ‘I mean, it’s got a pretty distinctive seal on the back of it.’ 

Before you can ask him anything else, Jesper snatches the letter out of Wylan’s hand, looking at it. 

‘Why would a Ravkan send you a letter?’ he chuckles, flipping the envelope around in his hands. When his eyes fall on the seal, they widen. ‘Correction.’ says Jesper, while looking at you. ‘Why would a Lantsov send you a letter?’

Now your eyes widen as well. ‘What?’ you say. ‘That has to be some kind of joke.’

You lean over the table and take the envelope out of Jesper’s hands. You take another sip of your drink as you look at the seal on the back of it. Indeed, the Lantsov double eagle is on it. 

‘Nina.’ you say, turning to her next to you and handing her the envelope so she can look at it as well. ‘Do you have any idea as to why your king would send me a letter?’ 

Nina looks at the seal as well, running a finger over it. ‘I don’t know.’ she says. ‘But this looks like a legitimate seal, though. It’s on the ones I get as well. I don’t get a lot of them, but I do recognise that seal. This isn’t a fake.’

She hands it back to you and your flip it over in your hand. When you look up, you see all three of your friends looking at you. 

‘Why would he send me a letter, though?’ you wonder out loud. ‘And how does he even know I exist? Or where to find me?’

‘Well, after all, you are a merchant’s daughter.’ says Jesper.

‘Shh!’ you quickly say. ‘We’re still in the Crow Club, Jes!’

Jesper quickly apologises, looking around to see if anyone heard him. But the people around you are too caught up in their own drinks and games to have heard anything you were saying. 

‘But why would the king of Ravka keep track of Kerch merchants? He only approaches the merchant council for loans. And if he needs to contact them, he sends letters directly to the members of the council.’ you say. 

‘Well, you won’t know until you open it.’ says Nina. ‘Besides, what’s the worst that could happen? He doesn’t even know you.’

‘You’ve got a point.’ you say. ‘And I can’t deny I'm curious.’

Slowly, you open the envelope, pulling out a short letter. You’re well aware of all of their eyes on you as you read the message.

“Dear miss Y/F/N Y/L/N,

My name is Nikolai Lantsov (as you probably would have guessed upon seeing the wax seal on the envelope), I’ll spare the ink and not name all of my titles. Though my triumvirate would like me to. 

I am writing you to tell you I am hosting a ball, one week from now, at the Grand Palace in Os Alta, Ravka. You are hereby invited to attend said ball, at the end of which I will choose a bride.

I await your response, and I promise there will be good wine.

Yours sincerely,

King Nikolai Lantsov, of Ravka”

You read the letter over and over again, trying to get the words to sink in. Nikolai Lantsov himself wrote you an invitation. To a ball at the Grand Palace. And he’d choose a bride. Someone to be his queen.

You snort and throw the letter on the table.

‘Well, that was interesting to read.’ you say.

Jesper moves to pick up the letter, but Nina is faster. Wylan and Jesper lean in closer, and she softly reads the letter out loud. You see looks of surprise and confusion on their faces as Nina reads the letter.

When she’s done, they all look at you in confusion. You chuckle and take the letter from Nina’s hands, folding it and tucking it in your pocket. 

‘Do you think I could sell this to the highest bidder?’ you say. ‘It’s got an authentic Lantsov signature on it.’

‘Why on earth would you do that?’ says Jesper.

You look at him. ‘You don’t seriously think I’ll go?’ you say.

‘Duh!’ says Jesper. ‘Why not? Y/N, this is a king. And he’s inviting you to a ball. You could become queen!’

‘I have no intention of becoming queen.’ you say, finishing your drink. ‘Besides, I don’t want to leave Ketterdam.’

‘I bet Os Alta is a whole lot nicer than Ketterdam, though.’ says Wylan.

‘And have a servant do every little thing for me? Eat the finest food all day every month? Go to balls and war meetings? No thank you.’ you say.

‘Why do you talk about it as if it’s a bad thing?’ says Wylan.

‘Because I told you, I have no intention of going to a ball and becoming queen. If you’re asking me, I think writing that letter was a waste of ink and paper.’ you tell them. ‘Besides, if he’s smart, he’s going to marry a Fjerdan or Shu princess to establish an alliance. Even if I wanted to go, there’s no way he’d pick an ordinary Kerch merchant’s daughter to be his queen.’

‘A word of advice?’ says Nina. 

You look at her and motion for her to keep on talking. 

‘I’ve met Nikolai several times. He’s a good man. Would it really be that bad to even attend? You’re not agreeing to marrying him, you’re just going to a ball. Why not give him a chance?’ she says.

‘Because I think balls are a waste of time. And money. And simply because I don’t want to play dress up and act like a perfect daughter.’ you say, getting up and putting on your coat.

‘At least think about it?’ says Nina.

‘For your sake, I will.’ you say. ‘I’ll even pretend like I haven’t made my decision yet.’

‘It’ll be great for your reputation!’ says Jesper as you move through the crowd toward the door.

‘I’m not going to Os Alta!’ you yell at him over your shoulder. When you’re at the door, you wave goodbye at them and head outside. It’s a particular cold night, and you wrap your coat tighter around you and pull your hood further down.

Somehow the invitation feels like lead as it sits in your pocket. So Nikolai Lantsov himself invited you to the Grand Palace. Though you’re flattered, you’ve already made up your mind. 

You’re not going to Os Alta. After all, what could be waiting for you there that you couldn’t find in Ketterdam? You’ve got very good friends here, plenty of kruge, and you live in a mansion. 

Surely Os Alta couldn’t offer you more than that?

A/N: If you want to request something, make sure to read my house rules Here’s the list of characters I write for. Everything that I have written can be found on my masterlist. Please don’t repost my work, as I spend much time and effort on it!! Thank you for reading! Much love, Marit

[bonny-kookoo]

Good Girl [J.JK x Reader]🔞🌼

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Smut, Fluff, a lil angst

Warnings: dom/sub dynamics, dom!jungkook, sub!Reader, size kink, oral (f & m rec.), mild dd/lg themes, praise kink, cumplay, reader is a virgin, jungkook is lowkey a hoe, a lil heartbreak, Taehyung makes an appearance, long haired jungkook, mentions of harrassment, jungkook punches a guy, strength kink

Jeon Jungkook was known to have a specific type when it came to his partners; tall, gorgeous, dominant and older. It's not like he's a true blood baby boy; he's just too lazy to put any effort into his flings. When a new girl answers to his ad online searching for a roommate for his apartment to share rent and space however, he didn't quite expect such an innocent being to turn up at his doorstep with a box full of pastel colored belongings, ready to move in. And what he definitely didn't expect was his growing interest in her and the feeling of having her under him, all submissive and ready to be ruined.

Good Girl || Sweet Girl || Smart Girl || Brave Girl || Pretty Girl || Charming Girl || Enticing Girl || Bad Girl || ???

A wink was all he got from the woman who'd occupied his bed together with him last night as she walked out his bedroom door, seemingly knowing how to get out of his apartment. Jungkook ran his hand through his still sweaty hair, groaning after stretching his arms above his head, his mood seemingly sunkissed. He just finished an almost three hour sex-session after all; all without him providing any actual effort. His dick had seemed to be enough for her anyways, her face when she rode him happy, although he could really care less.

Reaching for his laptop near his bed, he didn't bother to put on any clothes for now, just wanting to check if he'd gotten any new E-Mails or messages, clicking through the casual nudes that constantly seemed to slip into his postbox. He cocked his head to the side however when he noticed that a website has notified him of an answer to his ad online; he'd put it up some time ago now after Taehyung, his former roommate, had to move out simply because Jungkook himself couldn't survive the older one's sleep shedule. Tae seemed to never sleep, waking the younger one up on a daily (and nightly) basis. He really tried to get along with him, both of them sharing a deep friendship, but god no, as a roommate he couldn't stand that guy. His rent however was something he struggled as well, so as much as he really wanted to live alone, he couldn't. He clicked the message on the website, his interest peaked.

"Hello. Is this AD still up to date? My name is Y/N, and I'm searching for a place because I'm starting to work close by soon, and its too expensive to take the bus for hours on end every day.. so uh, I don't know? I'm really good at cooking, and I promise I'll be so quiet and organized you won't even notice I'm there! I work at a restaurant nearby as a waitress- I mean, I'm going to, haha. Ugh, I hope you're okay sharing your apartment with a girl as well, I for my part don't have a problem with that! So, I guess, I'll wait for your reply?

Have a nice day!"

He scoffed a little, hovering over the delete button, but instead, he clicked her profile icon, opening the details. Her profile picture showed a white big dog, being hugged by what he assumed was her. He couldn't see her face however, half of her face above her nose cropped out to fit the entire dog instead. He could spot her clothes however; a top and skirt, flat shoes and sheer tights with white spots on them. His brows furrowed, how old was she? Her profile said she was about a year younger than him, every post she'd made up to this date about pet stuff, clothes who all seemed to follow a pastel-color scheme, and artwork you seemed to be selling. You were basically the definition of cute.

Fan-fucking-tastic. Hopefully you wouldn't be too upset when he denied your request, but somehow he thought it over. You said you could cook and you did seem like an organized person. Knowing what kind of effect he could have on people, he could probably scare the shit out of you and keep you around without really having to interact much; and rent was also due this month, so the sooner he found a roommate the better. "Fuck it." He said, and began to type his reply.

When his doorbell rang, he almost burned his hand with the hot water he currently used to make himself a cup of ramen, cursing loudly. Who the fuck wasn't home again so he had to take their package in? One day the old lady across the hall would find a dead rat or something in front of her door, he swore to himself. Ripping the door open with so much force he could feel a bit of wind gushing by, his eyes widened when he saw a similar face in front of him- well, a little below actually. He remembered your lips instantly for some awkward reason, having tried to maybe paint a picture of what you looked like entirely over the last few days. He would've never expected something like this however- you looked like a literal doll in his opinion, your eyes wide open and mouth a little parted, shiny lipgloss making him swallow. Wait, did he really forget that you said you wanted to move in today?!

"I uh.. I'm- I'm Y/N, we- I- the ad..?" You said, your voice sounding nothing like the woman he usually was around. He smirked a little, moving so you could step inside, food now definitely forgotten on the kitchen counter. He really should've at least cleaned up a little he thought. Whatever.

"Yeah, figured. There you go, thats your room. The keys and shit are on the matress, make sure you don't loose 'em." He simply said, before leaving you alone in your new home to settle down.

"What I'm trying to say is, Y/N, you and I, this could really be something!" Taehyung slurred into your ear, loud enough for Jungkook to hear. For some reason it pissed him off to no ends how close the older one seemed to be, constantly hitting on you like he was a starving man, even know half of town knew very well that he wasn't. He could see why; you were innocent, and Tae known to fool around a lot. You were a challenge, something new for him, and he would lie if he said that he wasn't interested as well. Oh he was; but he also had at least some manners left inside of him, contrary to popular belief not only thinking with his dick. Taehyung however was only out for fun, making Jungkook question if he should really let this continue.

He decided no.

"Alright you fucking whore, it's bedtime isn't it? I'll call you a cab." Taehyung groaned at the younger one's words, nodded his head however before looking at you with a smirk.

"Ah, what a shame. But if you wanna have some fun you know my number!" He said, as if he didn't just offer you sex. You blushed at this, not answering, making Jungkook watch you a bit. You really were something else. "Jungkookie, you're so nicee... If I was gay I would definitely suck your dick-" The younger in question made a disgusted yet amused face, putting a hand over the blue haired one's mouth.

"Yeah yeah, you pay me back though you fucker." He said, before going into the kitchen to make the call. Taehyung, being left alone with you again started with his questioning, as he had done the entire night.

"So, Y/N.." He said, dragging out the last syllable of your name playfully, making you shuffle around where you were sitting a bit. He certainly was a pretty attractive guy, but he also seemed to be very straightforward- something you always had struggled with, being more on the shy side. You looked at him, silently urging him to continue before taking a sip of your own beer- cherry flavored, simply because the regular was too bitter in your opinion. "What kind of toys do you use, heh?" He questioned, and you coughed suddenly. Taehyung laughed loudly at that, cooing when you calmed down slowly.

"Taehyung, stop harassing my roommate you fucking idiot. I need her to pay half of the rent-" He said, before sitting down next to you, raising one of his eyebrows at you. "And she also makes some killer lasagna. Kinda wanna keep that." He said, before laughing a bit. Even though Jungkook seemed to be pretty intimidating to you, he was actually a pretty good guy to have around. You both barely ever fought, and overall you could almost see yourself falling for him too- he had the looks after all. But his habit of bringing people over just to satisfy himself was something that made you keep some distance between you both. He wasn't someone to settle down- let alone with someone like you. You were pretty much the exact opposite of what he seemed to like.

Sending Tae home was easier than you both thought. Not being able to go to bed you both decided to watch some late night shows while casually talking- something that wasn't uncommon between you two. Just when you seemed to have gotten comfortable again, Jungkook couldn't help but tease you again.

"So, what Toys do you use, heh?" He said, laughing with his head thrown back afterwards at your red face. This would certainly never get old in his opinion. Just as he was about to apologize and tell you you didn't have to answer, your voice was heard, however.

"None." You said, and his eyes widened at that. "What? Do I look like I do these things to you?" You asked, and he cocked his head to the side a bit, scanning you obviously. He shrugged, and you began to pout, moving to wrap your pastel pink blanket around yourself. "I don't even know how to buy one. That stuff is just.. don't know. Gross." You said, and Jungkook turned on the couch, body facing you now, his interest sparked.

"Gross? So you never had sex before?" He said, and you went silent. Were you serious right now? You were an angel in his eyes, body proportions almost perfect, hell, even your slight imperfections were adorable in his eyes. Up until now he had been sure that you at least have had your fair share of experience, but a virgin? His world was suddenly turned upside down. "Well.. that's something I didn't expect." He said, making you raise your eyebrows at him. "You're hot. Thats why. Oh well." He said, missing the way your eyes widened at that. "I'm gonna go to bed now. Goodnight." He simply said, and you answered with a short 'goodnight' as well- still a bit surprised by his statement. Jungkook thought.. you were attractive?

He'd somehow gotten used to you, how you would leave your pastel pink but admittedly really soft blanket in a pile on one edge of the couch in the living room, how you sometimes left your toothbrush in the sink when you'd been in a hurry, or how you would hum to a song, not knowing he could hear you very clearly. Maybe he really did go soft after living with you for a while. He still didn't know himself why he got so upset with Taehyung the day prior; was he really being selfish? He was protecting you, nothing more. Taehyung was everything but a gentle lover, jungkook just knew he'd break you for sure, not to mention that you already stated how much you despised one night stands, which were practically Taehyungs speciality. He was just looking after you, nothing more.

The more he thought about it however, the more problematic the entire plan became.

But even now, while the young woman whose name he had already forgotten was giving it her all sucking his dick, all that seemed to swim around in his head were the events of the previous evening; how innocent and embarrassed you looked at him when you told him you'd never bought, let alone use a toy before. Surely you'd be someone to enjoy a good vibrator he thought, maybe as a gag he could buy you one? Oh how enchanting you'd look, spread out on his mattress while he would edge you over and over until you'd be crying, begging for his mercy. He would praise you for taking it so well, for being so good for him and only him, and he just knew you would blush. Instead of rushing to his own satisfaction, he would go slow, agonizingly slow, just to see how far he could push you. He would feast on you like a predator on his prey, pull you close so you had no chance of escaping him, he would trace every curve of your skin, gently, as if to make up for the bruises and Mark's he would surely leave all over you to feed his inner need to claim you, even though he would never let anyone see you like this while he was alive and breathing anyways. He just knew you would fit perfectly underneath him, his body covering you and shielding you away from the world around. Would you be able to take all of him? He probably would have to stretch you real good before even thinking about pushing his dick inside you, yet he just knows you would somehow make him proud and take it all, and he would continue his praises, telling you what a good girl you are.

He almost laughed at the situation, he really was in deep, wasn't he? Frustrated and confused he started to picture someone else entirely kneeled between his legs on the floor, how you'd bat your eyelashes at him like the fucking angel you were instead of the girl currently there, and that thought alone gave him the final push to shoot his load down the strangers throat, who moaned obscenely at the feeling. Usually he would be aroused, ready for more, but the sound of someone who wasn't his little roommate ripped him out of his daydream. This couldn't go on like that. Sending the lady out without many words, he decided that he just needed to fuck you, and all would be good again. He was just curious. Nothing else. He just needed to satiate his hunger and he could go back to normal.

How would he be able to do this without ending up hurting you? No matter how big his hunger for you was, he also considered you somewhat of a friend. He remembered when you came home crying one time after a bad day at work, and how he wanted to hold you, shielding you from any harm, making you feel safe. Because that's what he, and only he could do in his opinion. No matter what, he'd protect you, as weird as that sounded. Shit.

He really had a crush on you.

Unknowing to him you always held your hands over your ears whenever he brought home a different girl, not being able to listen to his moans mixed with someone else's. You were slowly beginning to regret moving in, already starting to think about maybe searching for a different apartment. But the rent was cheap, your room big, and his company relaxing when he wasn't busy being buried in someone he couldn't even remember after a day or two. Somehow tears were leaking out of your eyes, and you took your hands down from the sides of your head to wipe them away, careful to be as silent as possible as to not alert him that you were awake, well aware of the shower turning on. You did notice however how his sessions became shorter and shorter, always seeming to end sudden instead of usual. But the more you thought of it, the more angry at yourself for falling for this manwhore you became. You really should hate him- but you couldn't.

Tonight was definetely the prime example of why you didn't go into clubs. The sheer amount of people around you, the smell of sweat and cheap cologne and perfume all around made you feel like a headache was inevitable. Why were you here again? Oh yes. You followed Taehyungs advice and 'tried to make friends' instad of looming around your apartment all day. But right now you just really wished you stayed home instead of going here.

Sure, you liked your coworkers, and they seemed nice and everything, but if you were being honest, they're definition of fun was entirely not yours. You began to feel cramped up in the large club, making you desperately pull your phone out of your pocket, texting Jungkook in hopes he could save you from this god forsaken torment they called a club.

  Minutes later, after Jungkook oh so gentlemanly told you to pick you up, you stood in front of that said location, waiting for his cheap but admittedly nice car to pull up. Sadly, someone else seemed to be way more intent on bringing you home- a young man your age, attractive, yes, but also heavily intoxicated. He had already eyed you up inside the building you noticed, yet hadn't made a move towards you. Now however, he seemed more determined than ever.

"Lets go home baby, I swear you won't regret-" He started, but you moved away from him, clenching onto your little handbag in order to at least keep your belongings safe if he tried anything else. Suddenly both your figures were drowned in the warm light of Jungkook's car lights- you immediately recognized them simply by the fact that one was brighter than the other, something you always told him, yet he always waved you off, telling you that both were doing just fine, even though his left light was clearly almost dead. Typical him, you thought. Yet right now, you couldn't be happier to see him.

He however, did not seem happy at all. His face was serious, his wavy hair hanging a little over his eyes, steps fast and strong enough that you could hear his black boots almost crush the slight gravel of the parking lot. "Fuck off sunnyboy and go back inside." He simply yelled out, having already seen how uncomfortable you were with the stranger so close to you. Jungkook wasn't someone to blindly punch someone, that said however, he couldn't contain himself once he saw the guy reaching out for your arm, your figure instinctively scrambling to get behind Jungkooks way larger body. He didn't even notice his fist connecting with the strangers face, simply leading you by the small of your back inside his car, driving home without any more words.

You were not to be touched by someone so dirty like this young man who didn't even knew his own limits it seemed.

Yet you were completely confused now. Maybe, if you were now the reason he got into physical fights, you should make a decision.

The next morning, sitting down at the kitchen table, you watched Jungkook filling your bowl with cereal as well- lucky charms for you, and chocolate chips for him. It became somewhat of a routine since you both woke up roughly around the same time, sharing breakfast was common. The best moment in your opinion to pop the bomb.

"I'm moving out." You said softly, fiddling with your fingers in your lap, leg nervously bouncing up and down. Why did this feel like you were breaking up with him? You both would've ended up going separate ways sooner or later anyways- so he would probably just nod, ask when, and that would be it. He was someone who didn't bother much. But the second you said it, he turned around completely shocked, suddenly very much awake.

"Why? Did I do something?" He asked, sounding genuinely offended for some reason you couldn't come up with. In his mind, scenario over scenario started to play, as if he wanted to search for something he may have said or done to make you so upset that you didn't want to live with him anymore. He knew he shouldn't be so upset over it, since you and him were merely roommates, friends who shared an apartment, nothing more, but he never really expected you to come up with it so sudden. Or maybe you had a boyfriend? What if it was Taehyung, and you just didn't tell him? He would rip that fucker's stupid blue hair out, he knew-

"No. I- not reall-" You sighed, setting your elbows on the kitchen table before letting your head fall into your hands. "Actually yes, you did." You started, looking at him, but unable to hold eye contact with the now completely confused curly haired boy in front of you. "You.. uh.. I cant sleep. Your, 'guests', the walls aren't really soundproof and like, I really- and just.. ugh this is so awkward, please don't make me say it-" You said, groaning the rest of your sentence before stubbornly shoving your back against the chair, throwing your legs back and forth viciously, reminding Jungkook of a kid who was close to throwing a tantrum. Even though this was definitely not the time to think about you laid out over his leg, his hand hitting your perfectly shaped butt until it was red just to punish you for being such a brat, exactly this picture began to form in the back of his head. He hated himself somehow, really. But somehow instead of accepting your decision, he moved to stand at the table, hands on top of it, eyes searching yours.

"Say it Y/N. You know I hate when I have to pull thing out your throat sweetheart." He didn't intend on using the nickname, but somehow he threw his hesitation out the window. If you really were fooling around with someone, someone who wasn't him he wanted to know- and even if you didn't share that information with him, you would move out anyways, so why hold back anymore? You shook your head at him, avoiding his gaze, and he clicked his tongue, patience slowly thinning out. "Spit it out." He said again, but he still got no reaction. His hand seemed to move without his consent when he suddenly found his fingers on your chin, moving your head to force your attention towards him. "Speak the fuck up, I swear to god." He said, voice dropping down lower, and somehow you seemed as if bewitched.

Maybe it was the way he stood there, how he still held your chin, or how intensely he looked at you, but words dropped out of your mouth as if you drank harry potters truth potion. "I cant stand that you let these girls touch you, that they can get you so easily and you just look past me a- and I really tried you know, because Taehyung said you liked mature girls more so I tried to do that, but he lied to me, you don't notice me at all, you're so mean you-" He shut your mouth with his mouth, trying to process the information he just received, yet it seemed like it was too much at once. You were.. jealous? And what kind of stupid advice was Taehyung giving away, that fucker? It was true that he liked his women to be confident and mature, but that was just so they knew what they were doing, and he didn't need to put so much effort into something he could get so easily.

"So you were jealous?" He said, a small smirk creeping up on him, cooing at you internally when you shook your head, face red. "If you wanted me to fuck you, you could've just asked. Geez." He said, but instead of being relieved, your shoulders sagged down. "What?" He asked, and you mumbled to him.

"Because I don't want just that one time stuff you do." Jungkook looked at you, eyes softening at your somehow-confession. He just put together the pieces in his head, and it did make sense. You were practically attached to him wherever he took you, always seemingly glowing whenever his attention was on you. He was as much as a dense head than you were, and he couldn't help but pull out a chair and sitting down, patting his legs as an invitation.

"Good, because I don't want that either. And I don't share either." He said, and looked at you gently, but with a deep darkness behind his eyes. "Trust me baby, you can sit down now and I promise you'll be the only one to have me- or you can move out and go on with your life." He almost laughed at the way it suddenly clicked in your head on what he was offering, suddenly jumping up and sitting on his thighs, legs on either side of his body. He looked down at you, a divine picture coming to life. His hands were placed on the exposed skin under your skirt, slowly sliding over the soft skin until his fingers felt the seam of your tights- those goddamn things he'd wanted to rip off of you so badly these past days. "You can touch me, you know?" He said lowly, and you noticed how awkward you must've looked for a second, seated on his lap with your hands in front of you, unsure where to put them. Just to ground yourself, your fingers began to play with his shirt, and he had to swallow the laugh that wanted to break free. "You don't have to do this, you know? I'm fine with waiting-" He began, but you immediately shook your head, however, at loss for words. He smiled again, dangerously so you noticed. His head dipped down, finally touching your skin on your neck with his lips, leaving open mouthed kisses under your earlobe down to the crook, hands moving over your clothes already mapping out your body in his mind, one hand pulling down one side of your soft fleece jacket you wore, pulling down your shirt as well, so he could softly nip at your shoulder, making you gasp oh so cutely at his actions. His hands didn't stop however, moving over your chest, kneading both of your breasts softly, as if he would hurt you if he used too much strength- which was probably the case. He already loved how bis his hands looked running over your body, how your hands held his shirt in fists, eyes closed, yet not because of fear; you looked serene to him, face showing him the soft pleasure you felt. He suddenly moved you a little, making you straddle one of his leg, core pushed against his thigh. "Let's start slow, yeah?" He asked, whispering words into your ear, lips never parting from you. He slowly began to move your hips, urging you to simply follow what you thought felt best to you. "Use me baby. Get off on my thigh." You whined at that, slowly starting to move more and more boldly, and he decided that he was officially a goner. Even if you didn't want him after whatever may be happening, he knew he could never go back. The way you squeezed your eyes shut every now and then, moving back and forth yet always a bit helpless, showing how inexperienced you were. He could feel the wet patch forming on his jeans, his hands moving you a bit faster, before you let your head fall onto his shoulder, making him chuckle. "What is it baby? Do you need help, hm?" He said, a bit mockingly even, and you nodded into his shoulder. "Tell me what you need then. What do you want, princess?" He said, running his hands over your back, feeling your bodyheat through your clothes.

"wanna get the same.. as the others.." You mumbled, unsure what you were even asking for. Jungkook however simply smiled, suddenly lifting you up, hands under your behind carrying you to his room, before finally letting you fall onto his mattress, laughing when your body jumped a little, making you squeak so cutely. He smiled, crawling over you, his fantasy finally coming to life- you looked so lost under him, so utterly defenseless he could swear he could feel something primal awake inside him- and that was not his dick, which already strained against his jeans, impatient.

"Ah but Baby.." He began, taking off your soft jacket before his hands traced your bare arms until he moved them under your shirt, feeling your skin underneath his fingers. "You're my special girl.." He began to lift your shirt up, helping you out of it before he got rid of your skirt as well, chuckling at your cute lacey underwear, which was so typically you. So innocent, yet so arousing, how you squirmed underneath him in nothing but those pastel colored undergarments. "And special girls get special treatments.." His words were low, soft spoken yet with a rough edge to his tone, a natural feature of his voice that you've come to love. You couldn't even begin to paint out a picture of what he was talking about- sure, you have seen your fair share of adult films, you weren't a kid after all- but up until this moment, up until you met Jungkook, you've never really thought about what you could like when it came to these things. Even in your thoughts you felt shy saying any profanities out loud, how could you expect to know about kinks? "But only if you can behave for me, but you can do that right?" He said, unhooking your bra behind your back with ease and interrupting your inner talk with yourself. "You'll be my good girl, yeah?" He said, and you just viciously nodded, already growing frustrated, and oh how he loved it. This was how he had pictured you. If he had known before that this was what it felt like to have control over someone, he would've never done anything else if he was honest; but then again, you really were a special girl to him. The way you suddenly mewled when his hand cupped your heat, giving you a little pressure just to tease you even further almost caught him off guard. God have mercy on his soul, you were so sensitive to him, and it dawned on him again that he was making you this way. He was the first to- and he would make sure he'd be the only one as well. All those noises tumbling out of between your lips were only his to hear. His breathing peaked up at the view he had, how you began to impatiently rut into his hand, needy for more than he was giving you. He leaned back, finally getting rid of his own clothes as well to your satisfaction, lazily throwing his opened flannel as well as his white shirt somewhere on the floor in his room, and you couldn't help but stare. Truth be told, you didn't really know what to expect of him if you were honest, his constant gym visits giving you the impression that he had to be extremely fit, yet his habit of consuming more than two cups of ramen easily spoke differently. He was, in your eyes, the perfect in-between- he definetely was fit, his abs visible to your eyes, yet he didn't look like those over-achievers you sometimes saw walking around the same gym whenever you met him there to go home together. The way his muscles flexed at every move when he loomed over you again made you want to touch him, yet your shy side forbade you. He chuckled again. "You can touch what's yours all you want, you know?" He said, before he began to place his hand back onto your chest, his breath hot on your collarbone where he placed his kisses again, already hooked on your taste. His other, tattooed hand found its way back to your core, feeling the dampness there with amusement. You were more than what he'd imagined. Slowly he got rid of that barrier however, leaving your tights on for his own pleasure and maybe also for the aesthetic of it, his digits circling around your sensitive bud, making you squeal again, putting your hands over your mouth to keep your voice down. He clicked his tongue at this, moving them to lay right under the small of your back. "Be good and keep them there, yeah?" He said, and you looked away.

"But its- thats emb-" You couldn't even finish the beginning of your rant before he went back to his task at hand, sitting back before moving your legs to spread obscenely over his thighs simply to catch a glimpse of your glistening center, before he placed his body over yours again, hand now roughly circling in delicious eights around your clit, making you gasp out.

"Nothing you do is embarrassing, you hear me. If anything its fucking hot how you can be so fucking adorable even with my hand between your legs, doll." He said, before dipping a finger into you, making you move a bit at the foreign feeling. "Gotta stretch you out babygirl.." He said lowly, careful not to get too fast. His second finger joined in, and he could feel how tight you were around them, already clenching a bit as well, making his mouth water, but also growing a bit of worry in the back of his mind. Usually he was quite cocky about his overly average qualities down in his pants, but now he was genuinely concerned to hurt you with it. This was definitely a first for him. "Baby you're so small.. I don't think you can take it.." He said, a bit of a teasing undertone to his words as well. "See? You're already squeezing my fingers so hard princess, how could my dick ever fit inside huh?" He said, contrary to his otherwise rough nature keeping his movements gentle and slow enough for you to adjust without causing much pain. He could see the slight discomfort in your eyes, yet you suddenly shook your head, voice whiny.

"Uh-uh.." You mumbled, and he laughed a bit at that. "can take it.." You said bratty as ever, feeding his ego to no ends. "Wanna have it- you.. you gon' give it right? 'm good.." You said, having troubles keeping your hands under your back just like he told you to, grabbing the sheets underneath you instead to have something to keep yourself grounded.

Jungkook couldn't stop smiling. You didn't even know what you were asking for, yet you seemed so drowned in trust with him, that you simply gave him the right to do anything he wanted with you. "You sure?" He said, and smiled at the way you nodded again with your eyes closed. He moved away after that, shedding his pants before he walked over to his bedside table, fishing out a condom, before moving back to you, your eyes now on him, or more than that, on his very apparent bulge his boxers failed to conceal. Maybe you really did ask for more than you could take. Quite literally. Sensing your growing uneasiness he simply discarded his underwear, cock finally springing free, slapping soundlessly against his abdomen before he sat between your legs again. You made grabby hands for the foil package in his hands, somehow wanting to slip it onto him, yet he shook his head amused. "Nuh-uh baby. I'm afraid if you touch me right now I'll just embarrass myself and come straight away." He said, and you giggled at that. The sound of it brought him back at ease, his little joke having helped to calm you down at least a little bit. He knew this was a big thing, especially for someone like you- and it made him feel even a bit pressured if he was honest. He was slow when he dipped his head inside, your body instinctively trying to move away a bit, but you forced yourself to stay still, eyes now pressed close. Moving around a bit he kept one hand around the base of himself, the other steadying himself next to your shoulder, kissing you on your lips for the first time since you both started, surprising you enough to not notice how he somehow began to glide into you with the help of your arousal and the lubricant of the condom around him. He groaned, the first actual noise he'd made you could tie to his pleasure, and your breathing picked up once you noticed how full you felt. Gasping several times he suddenly started to laugh, making you giggle as well, even though you didn't knew what was so funny in that situation. "God- ugh.. your- fuck you're tight.." He pressed out, fighting hard against his hips' own mind yelling at him to move, to wreck you, to utterly ruin you. But he couldn't allow himself to do that- reassuring himself that he would have time for that at a later date. He slowly started to move around after he calmed down enough, keeping his speed down to keep it gentle for you. "I- fuck.." He started, having to talk to stretch his patience out, and to also ease your mild pain a little bit. "Let's- ugh.. Let's go on a date tomorrow, yeah? I.. god-" He said, and you nodded, moaning in your delicate pitch he oh so loved. "Gonna be all romantic and shit- fuck- gonna treat you like- for Mcdonald's or some shit." He said, making you both laugh between gasps of pleasure, your hands suddenly frantically moving around the sheets, legs shaking as he began to speed up his pace. You didn't knew what an orgasm would feel like, or how you knew you would have one, but you gasped, chocking on unshed tears in frustration as you noticed that you couldn't tumble over that delicious edge, and Jungkook noticed, cooing at you. "Ah, my baby can't come without her little clit being touched?" He said, kissing the side of your neck, biting the skin teasingly before sucking a hickey on your collarbone, his hands now grabbing yours, fingers intertwining with his, before moving them around his neck, sensing how you wanted to be closer to him, even though that hardly seemed possible. "Come for me baby, you can do it." He said, kissing your shoulder as if to make up for his mark he'd left, his hand now reaching between your bodies, only needing to put a bit of pressure on your little nub to send you flying. You moaned out loud, uncaring on how you sounded, clinging onto him for dear life, his own release making him groan out as well.

He could feel your body trembling, your breathing still fast. He waited for a moment or two for himself to soften up so he could pull out gently- your still slightly clenching hole almost pushing his dick out of yourself. You whined at the empty feeling, and he hushed you gently, moving around so he was sitting up against his headboard, your body on his lap, head on his shoulder. His hand moved back and forth over your spine, the other keeping your body steadily against him. "You did so, so good baby." He gently whispered between your breaths still coming out a little faster than they should. "To be honest I actually was kind of worried you wouldn't be able to take it. I'm impressed princess." He said, making you giggle. You still weren't quite back yet, still bathing in your own afterglow, and he simply waited for you to calm down- slowly becoming aware of your surroundings again.

"Hey, Jungkookie.." You started with that nickname Taehyung always teased him with, yet you would get away with it anytime on his watch. He simply moved his head to look at you, even if you weren't at him. "Did you.. like, mean it? Are we.. a couple now, or?" You started a bit too softly, yet you didn't have to be scared of his answer to that.

He took a deep breath, before yawning a bit. "If you want us to be. I know I want to." He started, brushing some hair away from your eyes. You looked at him, big eyes so innocent like he didn't just fuck you into his mattress literally minutes ago.

"I want to!" You immediately said, making him chuckle and place a kiss on your nose, receiving a giggle at that, before you tensed up. He raised his eyebrows at that, before you looked at him surprised. "My legs are all- tingly.. Jungkook did you break me- HEY don't laugh!" You said, but he couldn't help himself.

He threw his head back, laughing his admittedly cute open laugh, before wrapping his arms around your body. "God I love you." He simply said, making you smile.

"Hey Jungkookie?" You said after a bit.

"Yeah Princess?" He answered.

"That McDonald's date still stands, right?" You said with a small voice, making him snort.

"Anything you want princess. Anything you want."

Taglist:

@mrcleanheichou @sugasbratz @sassysaxsolo @bananagukkie @wh3resangel @urmomgee

[sunmoonandeddie]

have you seen baby?

pairing: bucky barnes x reader x natasha romanoff

word count: 3,196

summary: You and your two lovers haven’t gotten to spend much time together.  Also, sex pollen.

warnings: Bad words.  Filthy, filthy smut.  Sex pollen.

a/n:  Thank you so much to @cake-writes for this commission!  I loved writing it and I really hope you enjoy it!

It’s late.  

Well.  Relatively late.  Nearing three in the afternoon, and Natasha hadn’t seen you.  Of course, that barred that morning when she woke up to your pretty face still sleeping beside her.  Unfortunately, Bucky was on a mission, otherwise she’d get to see his equally as pretty face on your other side.  It was disappointing.  There was just something so sweet about waking up to the two loves of her life.

But now, it was almost three, and you hadn’t even emerged from your lab for lunch.

Which is why she headed down two floors to the huge lab that you, Tony, and Bruce shared.  You kind of played as an inbetween for the both of them, wanting to know it all and then some.  It was precious.

But it also meant that you had a bad habit of getting lost in your work and not emerging for hours or sometimes days.  You had been getting better about it, if only because Bucky and Natasha were always on your ass about it.

Which is only because they love you.  So much.  Like.  So so much.

“Have you seen Baby?” Natasha asked Sam, who was wandering through the kitchen after his workout.

He had a protein shake in his hand, sweat dripping from his brow.  “No, can’t say I have.  And you know you can call her by her name when it comes to other people, right?”

She rolled her eyes and gave him a look.  “Her name is Baby.”

“To you.”

“To Bucky and me,” she retorted.  “And besides, she doesn’t even respond to her name when it’s coming from us anymore.”  A small smile crept up on her lips.  “It’s adorable.”  But she was on a mission.  She had a little box that came in with the mail that’s a present just for you.

And sometimes Bucky, depending on how he was feeling.

But Natasha didn’t like being touched.  She liked to give, but never to receive.  Her therapist said it had to do with the various traumas that she’d taken on while growing up in the Red Room.  Her body had never been her own during that time.  She’d been hurt over and over and over again, to the point where someone touching her body in a sexual way sent her into a panic attack.

Bucky was mostly the same way.  He had a hard time with sexual touch, though he’d gotten a lot better about it.

It was just one of those things that Natasha had to deal with.  Not that it was hard.  She loved taking care of you with Bucky’s help.  Their little pillow princess.

You were always the smart girl.  Some could argue that you were smarter than both Bruce Banner and Tony Stark simply because you knew both fields and then some.  You tended to become… obsessed.  You had to know more about everything just for the sake of knowing more.  But with that, your mind was always going a million miles an hour.  Which is why when it came to the bedroom, it was really nice to just be able to let go and not think for a while.  You got to be their dumb little baby girl.  It was always about you when it came to sex.

When it came to who needed cuddles and affection, that was when it was their turn.  You slept in the middle of them, cradled between them like a precious pearl.  You fought off their nightmares for them, their fears.  You made them see that they were more than the weapons they had been crafted into.  You provided relief for each other in different ways.

Before you had come along, Bucky and Natasha’s love had been volatile.  They were missing a piece of the puzzle, even if they hadn’t realized it.

And then their precious little princess had been hired on as a scientist, and their lives were forever changed.  They knew immediately that you were the one for them, their missing piece.

Of course, it had taken a while to get you to understand just what they wanted.  You might be the smartest in the lab, but when it came to relationships…

Which is what brought her to today.  You’d been a little… off lately.  Of course, that could be because her and Bucky had been on back to back missions for the past few months.  There hadn’t been a lot of time for the three of you all together, which was always frustrating.  It was the longest amount of time the three of you hadn’t gotten to all be together since becoming a triad.

And they felt even worse when they both had to leave on missions and leave you all by your lonesome.

Maybe they’d get you a kitten.  You wouldn’t have time for a puppy, but a cat?  You’d love that.  A little lab buddy.  Or maybe they’d get you one of those senior cats with three legs that was deaf in one ear.  Yeah, you’d love that.

But then it would die a lot quicker than a kitten, and they’d have to pick up the pieces because that would destroy you.  But then you’d also be so happy that you got to give the cat a really good few years at the end.

Whatever.  She’d talk to Bucky about it when he got home and they could make a decision.

But the little box.

The elevator down to the lab seemed to take forever, the silence mocking her since Tony absolutely hated elevator music and refused to let it play in the Tower.  But was even more unsettling was the fact that you weren’t in the lab.

“Hey, have you seen Baby?” Natasha asked Tony, who was fiddling with something on his tablet.

“It’s still weird that you call her that to everyone.”

“It’s her name.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Yes, it is.”

“Her name is—”

“Baby,” Natasha said, glaring at him.  “Yes, I know.  Have you seen her?”

“You disgust me.”  The man sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as his eyes squeezed shut for a moment.  “I think she went down to the spare testing room.  Something about an unknown vapor.”

An unknown vapor?  You hadn’t mentioned that.  Then again, you’d been kinda quiet lately.

She headed down another few floors, bearing the silence as she went through a mental list of things she needed to get done.  It was your birthday soon.  She needed to make sure all three of you could get off, and she’d plan something really special.  You deserved it.

The testing room you’re in has all floor to ceiling windows for walls, but she can’t see you.

“Strange,” she muttered under her breath.  She headed for the doors, and her eyes widened as she saw you through the glass.

You were lying on the ground, sweat dripping from your brow, with your hand in your pants.  From the… rapid way your hand was moving, there was no mistaking what was happening.

But why the hell were you touching yourself right there where anyone could walk by and see you?!  Not that she didn’t like it.  She loved watching you touch yourself and she often ordered you to when she was in a dominating mood.  It was so much fun watching you edge yourself.

No, it was the whole public thing that was confusing her.

You looked up as she started to push the doors open, her eyes widening.  “N-Natasha, no!” You shouted.

But it was too late.  A sickly sweet substance filled her nose, and seconds later, she felt a strange heat creeping up over her.  What the hell was happening?  And why did her skin feel so warm?

“N-Natasha,” you whimpered, rolling on your side.  Your fingers were still rubbing desperately at your clit, trying to find some kind of release.  “Nattie, it hurts.  It hurts.  M-Make it stop.”

And god damn it.  Her precious lover begging her to make whatever it was stop hurting?  She was gonna figure out a way to make it stop hurting.

She crawled towards her, frowning as she saw a broken test tube on the floor.  “What the hell is this?”  She couldn’t read the label on it, the ink smeared.  Tossing it to the side, she finally made it to you.  “W-What hurts, Baby?  What hurts?”

Your glassy eyes were wild as your hips bucked up in the air, a vein on your forehead popping out.  “F-Fuck me.  Fuck me, Nattie, please,” she begged, whining desperately.  “Oh, my god, I need it.  I need it.  Please.”

“H-Here?  Baby, wha—”

“Natasha, please, I am literally beg… begging you.  Please,” you cried, tears rolling down her cheeks.

Well.  It’s a good thing she brought the box with her.  She ripped it open, pulling out the new harness that she ordered with it.  “Okay.  Okay, angel, but you gotta let me get my strap on, okay?”  She asked sweetly as she stripped down.  She didn’t care who saw.  She had to help her baby girl.

Your response of a weak whimper only made her go faster.

She practically ripped off your clothes, a groan tearing its way out of her throat as she spread your legs.  You were so wet it was obscene, your poor little clit swollen.

“Oh, pretty girl,” she cooed as she ran her fingers through your slick folds, slipping two in with ease.  “You didn’t ask permission to touch yourself, sweetheart…  But I think I can let this time slide…”  With her one free hand, she pulled the new dildo out of its packaging, smirking at the whimper that escaped your lips as you saw it.

It was pretty.  Really pretty.  Eight inches, made of that realistic feeling silicone, and a gorgeous opal color.  Her and Bucky ordered it especially with you in mind, since opals are your favorite.

“N-Natasha, please…”  You grinded against her fingers, your pussy clenching as you tried to get more.

“Oh, good girl…  You look so pretty, Baby.”  She used her one hand to attach the dildo to the harness, her eyes flicking back and forth between the heat between your legs and her fumbling fingers as she finally got it secure.  She ran it through your folds, getting it nice and slicked up.

That’s when the doors opened again, the familiar sound of size twelve boots coming towards them.  “What the hell is that smell and why are you two—”  Bucky broke off as he felt the heat.  “Oh, shit.”

Natasha grinned as she looked over at Bucky.  They were both clearly feeling the heat that the mysterious substance had caused, but not nearly as bad as you were.  “I caught our little baby touching herself without permission… out where anyone could walk by and see her.”

The third member of your triad was already working on undoing his belt, tearing it off so quickly that it ripped a few of his belt loops, leaving little holes in his pants.  “Has our baby been a little naughty?” He asked as he stripped down, kicking off his boots.  He grasped your face with his metal hand, the cool digits a welcome reprieve to the heat that had overwhelmed you.  “Princess, have you been a bad girl?  Huh?”  He lightly slapped your cheek, just enough to get you to answer.  “When I ask a question, I expect an answer, sweetheart.”

You nodded, whining as you nuzzled your head against his cool hand, the angle hurting your neck a little since you were still on your back.  “Yes.  Yes, Bucky.  I’ve been so bad, I’m so sorry…”  You looked up at him with glittering eyes, your cheeks tear stained.  “I need you.  Please.”

His blue eyes were soft as he leaned down, stealing a soft kiss from your swollen lips.  “What’s your safeword, Baby?” He asked, his free hand wrapping around his swollen cock.

“Bracelet.”

“And if you can’t talk?” Natasha probed, still sliding her strap through your folds.

Your hand wrapped around Bucky’s wrist, squeezing twice.

“Good girl,” he said, kissing you once more.  His strong hands flipped you over easily, placing you on your hands and knees.

Almost immediately after, Natasha’s hand came down on your ass, causing you to jerk forward.  “You better suck Bucky’s cock, Baby,” she said as a smirk curled up the edges of her lips.  “If you want me to fuck you, you better put that pretty mouth to good use.”

“But—”

“Did she stutter, angel?” Bucky asked as he grabbed her chin, forcing you to look up at him.  “Tasha gave you an order.  Are you going to be a good girl and listen?”  His flesh thumb ran over your plump bottom lip.  “Don’t you wanna be a good girl for us?  Huh?”

Fuck.  Yeah, you did.  You always wanted to be a good girl for your two lovers.

Matching moans fell from Bucky and Natasha’s mouths as your tongue flicked out to slide up his length, circling around the head.  You always gave absolutely filthy head, your eyes watering as you choked around his length.

As you took him all the way, Natasha slid her strap into your wet heat, all the way to the hilt.  You let out a choked moan, your eyes wide as she started to thrust in and out of you.  Her fingers dug into your hips deliciously, the acrylics she kept at a relatively short length leaving little crescent moon indents.  You loved it.  The pain felt so fucking good.

“We should’ve made you wear your butt plug, Baby.”  Bucky’s jaw clenched as he reached to gather some of your slick on his finger, before circling it around your tight hole.  “Could’ve had you waiting for us to fuck you proper while I was on a mission all week…”

Natasha’s hips slammed against yours as she pressed her lips to Bucky’s.  “We don’t use the diamond one enough considering how much we paid for it.”

You pulled off of Bucky’s cock with a pop, glaring at the two of them.  “Is this the time to be talking about how often we use the butt plug?”

“Did I say you could stop sucking my cock?” Bucky growled as he grabbed your face and started throat-fucking you.  “It’s been too long since we put you in your place, angel.  You’re getting mouthy.”

“She’s always been mouthy.”

Tears rolled down your cheeks as Natasha and Bucky’s thrusts sent waves of pleasure through you.  The heat that had consumed your body was faded, and all you could think about was making your doms feel good.

All the background noise that had been in your mind over the past few weeks was gone, drowned out by the praises coming from your lovers.  All the self-doubt that coursed through your mind was gone when they loved you like this.

You choked around Bucky’s cock as you came suddenly, the release coming over you like a wave.

It only seemed to spur them on more as Natasha fucked you that much harder, Bucky’s fingers scratching soothingly against your scalp as he got closer and closer to the edge.  You could always tell when he was close by the way his thrusts got more and more sloppy.

Natasha’s hand reached down and around to rub your clit, the pretty opal dildo sliding in and out of you with ease.  She wished she had her phone if just so she could record the moans falling from you and Bucky’s mouths.

Hell, she’d make it her fucking ringtone.

It wasn’t long before Bucky came with a shout, spilling down your throat.

He groaned, his head falling back as he felt you licking him clean.  He let you finish before pulling out, getting on his knees and kissing you sweetly.

Your eyes were dazed, a little bit of cum you hadn’t swallowed dribbling out of your mouth.  You looked so damn pretty like that.  Dumb from pleasure.

“You gonna cum again for us, Baby?” He asked sweetly, holding your face in his hands.

A nod, your lips starting to move to form words but not quite getting there.  Adorable.

He watched it coming.  Watched as your breath hitched and your eyes rolled back in your head before you let out a cry.  You blacked out as your second orgasm ripped through you, violently like an earthquake.  A force of nature.

“Seriously?  In the lab?!” Tony demanded, glaring at them from the entrance.  “What the hell happened?!”

Bucky and Natasha were very blasé faire about their own nudity, but they didn’t like anyone else seeing you.  The redhead reached for the little test tube that she’d tossed to the side when she’d first gotten there as he covered you up with his leather jacket, cradling your exhausted body to his chest.  He pressed soft kisses to your forehead as he rocked you back and forth.

“I think it was whatever was in this,” Natasha said as she looked at it curiously, trying to make out what the writing on the label was.  “... Sexus… Pollinis?”

Tony grumbled as he walked over and grabbed the tube, looking it over.  “It’s literally Latin for sex pollen.  Which probably means exactly what we think.”

“Is that what the smell in the air was?” Bucky asked.

Natasha nodded.  “I think most of it spilled on her, which is why she was so affected but we weren’t.”

“Okay.  I’ll… clean all this stuff up,” Tony said.  “Get her out of here and in a bed.  Or a bath.”  He shook his head as he started to call for the robots that mopped the floor.  “Animals.”

You came to in your shared room, curled up between them in your giant tub.  “Wha’ happened?”

“Hey, baby girl,” Bucky cooed, his fingers massaging your sore shoulders.  “How do you feel?”

For some reason, you started crying.  It just came over you.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Natasha said, cupping your face and wiping your tears.  “Baby, what’s going on?  Huh?  Talk to us…”

“I-I’ve just been f-feeling so alone a-and this is the first time w-we’ve all been together in two m-months,” you whimpered in a shattered glass voice, barely able to string together a full sentence through your hiccups.  “A-And you’ve been gone s-so often that all I can think is m-maybe I’m j-just here because you’re both d-dominants and needed a s-s-submissive!”

Bucky and Natasha’s faces both fell and they squeezed you that much closer to them.

“Oh, Baby, no,” Natasha said.  Her heart hurt as she realized that that’s why you’ve been so off lately.  “We love you so much.  So, so much.”

“I think it’s time we stopped going on so many missions anyway, Baby,” Bucky added, his fingers tickling up and down your back.  “I’m tired of not being home with my girls.”

“Really?” You asked softly, looking at him like he’d just told you he’d give you the moon.

“Yeah,” Natasha said, bringing your hand to her lips.  She pressed a kiss to your left ring finger as her eyes met Bucky’s, a knowing look on his face.  Maybe soon there’d be a ring on that finger.  “Really, Baby.”

[jaskiersvalley]

Your safari au. Please. I need it. Water my crops with tigers and hyenas and witchers. Grabby hands and pleading faces in abundance here.

You are after my heart, Nonnie. And considering I've only talked about the Safari AU on Novigrad, I will happily assume you're lurking on there and I love you for it. Tweaked a little to add in a hyena just for you.

Lions and Tigers and Bears

Taking over a park was no easy feat, especially not when it came with a reputation like Nilfgaard had. Eskel scratched his head as he poured over the various financial reports, wondering just how much of it could be trusted. The problem was Nilfgaard had been a shining beacon in the animal conservation world, exceptional facilities, high enrichment for the animals and a successful rehabilitation rate. If there was ever an animal in need of a place, Nilfgaard had been first choice for years. All that came tumbling down in light of the revelation that Nilfgaard had been trading illegally, their animals sold to private owners as exotic pets or, even worse, hunters who wanted a guaranteed, easy kill. The place had been shut down immediately, a skeleton crew kept on to tend to the animals but nothing more. Management was on trial and Kaer Morhen had won the bid to take over. Though small and mostly unknown, nobody else had wanted to touch the remnants of Nilfgaard so they were quite uncontested in their bid. What had seemed like a good idea at the time, an noble because it was in the interest of the animals, now was an absolute headache.

Between the three of them, Geralt, Eskel and Lambert could split most of the urgent work. They had Jaskier working on rebranding, Yennefer managing the board and Vesemir as the head. It left them free to run the day to day of the park, learning the animals as well as the people who they had kept on. But they were going to need more people to actually help the place flourish and regain its standing in the community. Which meant asking the heads of departments for who should be kept on and what roles to recruit for from scratch. The easy ones were things like hospitality, Zoltan had a firm grip on the needs of the park and its visitors, knew all the catering firms and how to run a tight ship. So it was one less headache for them. Eredin had stepped up as Head of Security readily once it was proven he had no knowledge of the animal smuggling. Again, his familiarity with the park was a boon, as were his connections, putting together a security team that could be trusted. Much more messy was the animal welfare section. Fringilla, much like Eredin, had stepped up to become interim Head Zookeeper and was doing her best. While they were understaffed, Geralt, Eskel and Lambert helped out where they could but much of their time was spent getting to know the routine of the park and its many animals.

"We need to know who we can trust," Lambert grumbled, leaning over the table where they had personnel files open. "It's impossible to know who was in on things and who wasn't."

Though, in all likelihood, none of the lower level workers knew that when they helped usher one of their beloved animals into a crate, they weren't sending them off to another facility or a happily ever after. But it was something they just couldn't risk.

"May I?" Fringilla asked, eyes roving over all the files. At Geralt's gesture, she began pulling some of them out. "You'll want Triss, she was a vet here, promote her to senior or chief or whatever you call it. She's solid. And Sabrina, she's great, works well with Triss. Retain Istredd, Mousesack, Calanthe and Eist too. oh, and Letho for the reptile house." As she spoke, she kept looking with a small frown.

"Missing someone?" Eskel asked. Nodding, Fringilla frowned. Without much care for manners, she walked to the cupboards and began pulling out files until she hit the folder of resignations and terminations. From there, she pulled out one last file.

"You'll want him."

The folder was taken from her and the three peered at it with varying levels of frowns.

"You want us to hire someone who was terminated for gross misconduct? Whose notes suggest he abused animals and has blacklisted from working with animals?"

"No. I want you to meet the whistle-blower. Cahir's the one who found out about the trafficking and reported it. Nilfgaard didn't take kindly to it and retaliated."

Not sold on the idea, Lambert crossed his arms over his chest. "His file doesn't look exceptional. Personally, if he applied for a job, I'm not sure he shines enough to even be called in for an interview."

It was a sentiment echoed by the other two and Fringilla had to fight to hold back a sneer. "Invite him in and judge for yourselves. Just because his record doesn't have a quantifiable or gradable measure of commitment doesn't mean he won't be fantastic. If we ever have a new animal in that doesn't need to stay hospitalised, I wouldn't want anyone but Cahir to help settle it in. Especially the younger ones and babies."

Against their better judgement, the three decided to follow Fringilla's advice and e-mailed Cahir an interview offer. The reply was terse but assured them that he would be there at the agreed time.

First impressions were, to put gently, not great. Cahir looked rumpled, bags under his eyes and his attitude was rather sullen. It didn't bode well as they sat in the office, Cahir an odd mix of defiant and subservient. At least Fringilla had the grace to push the interview forward as much as she could until even she sighed and leaned back.

"Why don't we walk through some of the enclosures? Make sure you still remember what's where."

As they walked, Eskel ended up next to Cahir, who seemed content to not talk. That didn't stop Eskel from trying to initiate conversation.

"So, what have you been doing in the three months since you left here?"

"Tried to survive."

The blunt answer had Eskel blinking, there were many things he expected but not that. "Oh?"

For the first time Cahir actually looked at him, sadness bleeding through his half glare. "I used to live on site, worked for Nilfgaard from the age of 15, took a full time post at 18 and moved into the small cottage in the southern corner of the land. They fired me, I lost everything."

An uncomfortable silence settled between them as Eskel tried to figure out just how much of Cahir's so story was an exaggeration. "Have you been living with friends then?"

"For a few weeks, yeah." Cahir actually scoffed. "I've been trying to get a job and living in a hostel off savings. Turns out, only having in-house qualifications does not bode well for prospects in the world at large."

Fringilla led them into an enclosure where the grass was high. From the looks and smells, Eskel would have guessed it was a tiger's habitat but he wasn't familiar enough with the park yet to know. He would have hesitated going in, especially in a group like they were but Eskel had to trust Fringilla as she came to a stop and they stood in a loose circle.

The house Cahir had mentioned was one Eskel was familiar with. They had often wondered why it was empty yet well kept. It had felt like a life interrupted when they had a look round, nothing personal there yet it didn't have the empty, unlived-in feel of a show home. In a way, Eskel was regretting just how poorly Cahir's interview was going because he could easily see them offering his house back as part of a contract.

"So why are we here?" Lambert's words broke Eskel's reverie. "I thought we wanted to go on a walk."

It was by pure chance that Eskel caught Fringilla's smirk at Cahir and the slightest softening of that stern expression in return. Clicking his tongue, Cahir shot Lambert a look. "Tell me, have you ever been stalked by a tiger before?"

"No."

"You sure about that?" Cahir clicked his tongue twice and the world burst into motion. From the long grass a tiger pounced and Eskel was not ashamed to admit he let out a surprised yell. He wasn't the only one though, Lambert gasping, hand at his mouth and shoulders up as the tiger took Cahir out. They went tumbling and only Geralt looked like he might lurch into action, taking half a step towards the animal and Cahir. It would have been hopeless though, the two were wrestling on the ground until Cahir was on his back, tiger hunched above him.

The first thing Eskel noticed was how Cahir's face was creased into a happy grin. He looked younger, relaxed and happy ever as the tiger licked a large stripe from jaw, up his chin to his hairline. All Cahir did was laugh.

"Yes, yes, I missed you too, Princess," he said. fingers loosened from the fur in the tiger's neck and petted along her nose with the ease of familiarity.

"What the actual fuck?!" Lambert all but screeched. "What the fuckity fucking fuck?"

Eskel had the sense to look to Fringilla for answers, even if he wanted to watch Cahir with the tiger. The change in the man wasn't something he could have predicted. Gone was the sullen, defensive and standoffish air, replaced by an easy smile and a look of serene happiness as Cahir looked at the tiger, checking her over out of habit, muttering about dirty ears and mucky paws as he went.

"That is what you won't ever learn from a CV and qualifications," Fringilla said. She was absolutely looking smug. "Princess came to us at 9 months old, from a circus. Had terrible separation anxiety and a host of other issues too. She wasn't doing well despite our best efforts. At least, not until Cahir took her home and cared for her during the nights rather than leave her in a hospital cage. He introduced her to independence, slept out in the open with her for a few weeks when she was ready to transition to outdoors." Much more quietly, she added, "She's not the only animal he'd done that for. To find out some of his beloved children have been sold hit him hard. I don't think I'd ever seen him cry before then."

Turning back, Eskel watched as Cahir was sat on the ground, tiger with her back to him. The slightly strained "oh no you don't" from Cahir was lost as the tiger pushed up onto her hind legs and flopped backwards. Had she been smaller, Cahir would have probably caught her like a baby. As it was, he grunted as the weight crashed across his legs and he had a happily chuffing tiger's belly to tickle.

"I assume you'd vouch for him?" Geralt asked.

"In a heartbeat." Fringilla grinned at Cahir but it was lost on him, so focused on Princess as he was. The others might as well have stopped existing. That was the moment Eskel knew his heart was in danger. It didn't get easier as time went on. Hiring Cahir was proving to be a good decision. He just got on with the work, never finding anything distasteful or below him to do. If it needed doing, he got it done.

Over time he opened up too, Eskel found himself wandering down to the southern corner of the park to the little house that was now full of life. He got used to Cahir usually having a baby or two in his care. Sometimes he babysat for Letho's hatchlings, content to have baby snakes trying to look around his arms as they learned how to cope with being handled. The friendship between the two was one Eskel couldn't claim to understand but they seemed to make it work.

"Knock knock," he announced himself by the open back door.

"Come on in," Cahir called as he wandered out of the kitchen. "I'm just finishing making dinner, care to join me?"

That was new too, Cahir was inviting Eskel into his life more and more. It made Eskel feel even better about what he was planning to ask at Fringilla's instructions.

"I wanted to talk to you about tomorrow. There's a new arrival that we think will need your assistance."

Cahir cocked an eyebrow and held up an empty plate in question again. At Eskel's nod he began loading. "Anything you can tell me about it?"

"Not much. Private collector got raided, had a few animals in his less than tender care."

"So they'll be part socialised, part traumatised. I can work with that."

Somehow, Eskel had no doubts about that. But he was holding back some information because Fringilla had told him to keep it a surprise. The next morning the transport van rolled in, a small group of them ready to handle the newest arrivals. There were a couple of pythons for Letho to bring into his fold, a parrot for Guxart to train into swearing. Last was a large crate. As interesting as it was, Eskel's eyes were on Cahir, the way his nostrils flared as he caught scent of the hyena. The box opened and the animal cautiously peered out.

"Dave!" Cahir exclaimed, all semblance of quiet professionalism gone as he hopped off the top of the crate he'd helped open.

If his reaction had been exuberant, it was nothing compared to the hyena's. They collided next to the box, all over each other.

"I missed you buddy." There were tears running down Cahir's cheeks as Dave alternated between butting into him and running tight, excited circles around him before settling down and trying to bodily press into him. Glancing up, Cahir gave Fringilla a wobbly smile. "How did you find her?"

Her? Last Eskel checked, Dave was a male name. Still, he wasn't going to interrupt the tender reunion with such a dumb question.

"She was part of a collector's hoard. Didn't have the right permits so he was made to give her up to those who could offer her proper care."

A broken "thank you" was whispered in her direction before Cahir buried his face in the hyena's neck. Eskel watched with so many questions. Thankfully Fringilla didn't miss that fact.

"She was born in captivity, originally assumed to be a boy, needed to be hand reared after mum rejected her. She never understood that she wasn't human and as a result has spent most of her life living with Cahir. We've tried so often to introduce her to a pack but she never took to them, content to stay with them for a day, two at a push before she starts pining. When Nilfgaard sold her, that's when Cahir got suspicious, did some digging and realised she hadn't gone to another park. So Dave is a catalyst for this whole fiasco if you will."

Watching them, Eskel nodded. He had a hyena to befriend if he wanted to keep Cahir in his life it would seem.

[dcforts]

[day 19: photographs]

Miracle likes Cas right away, from the moment he sees him coming out of the rift, one arm slung over Dean’s shoulders.  

One sniff at his boots, one at the hand tentatively offered seem to be more than enough to convince him. He doesn't even have to pet him once.

Dean can’t blame him honestly and he doesn’t mind sharing the morning cuddles if Miracle still chooses to trail after him in the kitchen when he gets up, keeps him company in the garage and comes running to him if he wants a cuddle.

He spends all his nap times with Cas though. At first, he gets in the habit of falling asleep laying across his feet whenever Cas is sitting down and more than once Dean finds him in uncomfortable positions yet unwilling to move, insisting that he'd rather suffer than bother Miracle.

One time Dean happens to have his phone in his hand so he stops to take a picture with an amused smile, despite the annoyed face Cas makes at the camera.

Then Cas and Miracle start napping together.

In the library, in front of the tv, and some nights on the bed leaving barely any room for Dean to squeeze in next to them and then, when they get to their new place, it happens in the study, on their couch, and still sometimes on the bed but Dean doesn’t need to try and squeeze in next to them anymore cause they got a bigger one.

Dean takes a picture the first time he sees them, because it's the first time and needs to be documented. The second time, they're in a weird position and he wants to show it to Cas later and the third time - well, they just look cute.

On the day they move out he takes a picture of Miracle in front of the bunker’s door. Then they stop for gas and Miracle looks so happy with his head sticking out of the car window that he has to take one there, and then another one in front of their new house and then he finds that he just – can’t stop.

He gets him a rubber chicken that makes a sound the annoys the crap out of Cas. Dean takes a picture of him as it happily chews on it.

Miracle tries to get Dean to play one afternoon, pushing his snout against his hands, scratching at his jeans and resting his head on Dean’s tight, looking up at him. The pleading eyes is what does it. Dean closes his laptop shut to concede defeat and stand up but first he snaps a picture of him.

He wakes from where he's fallen asleep on the couch in Cas’ arms and finds their feet trapped by a heavy furry donut. He reaches for his phone on the coffee table and snaps a picture of him.

It gets – a little out of control, but Dean doesn’t realize it, not until Sam comes around one time and he's scrolling through his phone, saying, “Dude, how many pictures of Miracle have you got?”

A very pregnant Eileen rounds the kitchen table to look over his shoulder and raises her eyebrows. “Wow,” she says, “you got a problem.”

Dean leans over to snatch it away from his hands. “What are you talking about?" he says, but from just a quick look at his gallery it's pretty clear that she may be right.

There's Miracle. Then Miracle. One of Cas. Miracle and Cas. Miracle sans Cas. He and Cas. Sam and Eileen from when they all went to that restaurant on Saturday. Miracle. Cas. Miracle. Garth holding a plant? A colour palette for the guest room. Three of Miracle that look identical. The tap he's eyeing for their unfinished upstairs bathroom. Miracle again. Miracle as he's running in the park -

He puts his phone down. "It’s Cas, he’s always stealing my phone,” he says lamely, and he knows he doesn’t sound at all convincing so he adds, “And Jack wants me to send him pictures all the time.”

Eileen nods to herself, “God wants my brother in law to text him dog pics,” she says and signs, "Okay cool. Totally normal."

“Whatever. You’ll be worse than me when that one gets out,” he says pointing at Eileen’s belly. She laughs and Dean looks at her to say, “Sam will be one of those that shows pictures of their children to strangers, you know that, right?”

Behind Sam's back she silently signs, "I know," but Sam catches her anyway and bitchfaces them both, betrayed. “I’m not! And - we were talking about Dean and his obsession. I’m surprised you don’t have them framed all around the house.”

Cas chooses that moment to come in from the back door with Miracle in tow. “Not yet,” he says, amused.

Dean doesn’t even bother arguing, all he has eyes for is that fluffy ball running happily towards him, as if they haven’t seen each other less than an hour before. "There he is!" he says with a silly voice that makes Miracle wag his tail more energetically.

He crouches to take his head in his hands, "Did you have a good walk? Yes?” he says as Miracle wiggles like a fish in a net. He frees himself from his hold just to run around the kitchen table and get himself quickly pet by Sam and Eileen before going back to Dean with renewed energy, jumping on him and licking his cheek. Dean scratches behind his ears, “Uncle Sam is jealous cause he's as not photogenic as you. Well, he won’t get the awesome Christmas card we prepared for him this year, will he? He doesn’t deserve it.”

Cas has put away leash and waste bags and he's watching them with a smile. "We need to wash up," he says, so Dean plants a parting kiss on Miracle's snout and says, "Alright, go," but he stays put.

And yet, as soon as Cas says, "Come on, Miracle," he immediatly runs to his side and even anticipates him out of the room.

Dean stands up, throwing his hands in the air, “Can you believe this? He does everything he tells him, I say ‘sit’ and he licks my face.”

Sam and Eileen laugh at him and then Sam gets to his feet.

"We should go, we still need to go to the store," he says as they put their jacket on.

"Thanks for the coffee," signs Eileen, and then asks "Are we still on for Friday?"

"Yeah."

Sam says, "Cool. And if you find that picture I asked you in Miracle's personal photo book send it my way."

Dean flips him off.

"Add me to your dog mailing list," says Eileen when they get to the door and Dean rolls his eyes but gives her a hug and says, "I will."

Sam shouts "Bye Cas," immediatly followed by a "Bye, see you on Friday," coming from the bathroom down the hall.

Dean stays on the door to watch them as they get in the car and drive away.

Then he goes back to the kitchen, turns the radio on, washes up the coffee mugs and starts dinner.

When the timer dings, he turns off the oven, sets the table for two and goes to find Cas.

Sure enough, he's in the bedroom and he's fallen asleep on top of the covers with a hand on Miracle's back and him curled towards him, his head near Cas' shoulder.

Dean stops in his track. Flipping his family off in his mind, he takes out his phone and snaps a picture of the two.

Then carefully, as not to disturb Miracle, he climbs into bed to lay down right on top of Cas.

Cas makes a oof sound when he drops his weight on his chest but one of his arms circles him all the same.

"If you sleep now you're gonna be up all night," Dean says kissing his chin and jaw and any part of his face he can reach.

"Mh," says Cas cracking his eyes open, "you're heavy."

"Dinner is ready."

At that, Miracles lifts his head and his ears perks up, clearly interested in the conversation. He starts wagging his tail. Dean and Cas share an amused smile.

"Just another minute," says Cas.

"Alright," says Dean, planting one last kiss against his cheek, but when he tries to push himself up, Cas doesn't let him go.

He says, "Stay," and Dean doesn't need to hear it twice to collapse down once again. Miracle does the same; Dean closes his eyes and feels his wet nose against his forehead and his breath on his face as he gets comfortable.

"Wait, you meant that for me or Miracle?"

"Both," says Cas, one hand stroking his back, the other on Miracle's head. "Did you take a picture when you came in?"

"No," mumbles Dean, and then after a moment, "Maybe."

Cas huffs a laugh and Dean gets to feel it against his chest. He keeps his eyes closed and tries to match his breath with Cas' under him and Miracle's on his face and that's how he dozes off, smiling.

joining @bend-me-shape-me in doing this!

[gwydionmisha]

Personal:  Something Good Survived

Wednesday, I promised to take a couple of millennials swimming.  The heat and air quality have been terrible, but the air is generally a bit better at the lake and the run off fed lake is refreshing on a too hot for the local ecosystem and me kind of day.

It drizzled in the morning and was very overcast in the afternoon, but really, to me it had simply cut the air contaminants in halfish and lowered the temperature to reasonable summer day in this micro-climate from unnatural and wrong levels.

I had a doctor's appointment for the afternoon, and had scheduled with the millennials to pick them up downtown after.  I had a massive number of downtown errands, but the timing looked reasonable.  The poverty clinic was way behind, as is often the case, especially with the under-staffing thanks to the pandemic, and I knew my appointment would be longish.  There is skin cancer in my family.  I have been periodically on medicines that increase the chances of it.  I'm also an Elder Goth, which is protective.  If you've been avoiding the sun whenever possible since the mid-'80's your skin ages much more gently and it drops your skin cancer risk.  Still I'm in my fifties, and I've had assorted lumps, moles and skin tags since my early thirties. I also have a serious autoimmune condition.  Once I went on Medicare, i made a habit of going in once a year or so for a skin check/tag removal because it's free and a really good idea preventative medicine wise.  (It infuriates me that we got ACA instead of Universal single payer or at minimum medicare for all.  EVERY BODY should get basic preventative medicine.)  Anyway, I skipped two years for the pandemic and a bunch of things had grown or appeared or changed and this takes a while.  (I'm fine by the way.  The new weird thing may end up getting removed if it grows or gets more annoying, but otherwise is a nuisance not a danger.  We're also keeping an eye on yet another cyst, but the other random stuff was the usual).

I also needed bloodwork, and to pick up meds at the attached Pharmacy, change stuff at the library, go to the post office, pay a small bill I pay every month in person, and drop off my sandals for repair as they broke last week.

I did all but the last three in time to pick up millennials for swimming.  I collected them.  We did the post office run as the thing needing mailing was time sensitive.  I blew off the small bill until next week, which is fine.  I flaked the shoe repair, which is extra stupid as it was literally a place I passed after collecting techie millennial on the way to get head millennial.  D'oh!  I went to my favorite post office where there was no line.  (Most people don't know it is there.  it's mostly a sorting depot, and the line is short or non-existence except in November and December.  Plus it's an historic building and really pretty inside).  It took less than ten minutes even with the hobbling to and from parking.

We stopped so millennials could pick up snacks, and went up to the lake.  The over cast day had scared most people away, so the parking was great.  There were a ton of ducks and a murder of crows and a lone seagull.  Techie Millennial i went in and it was fine.  Head millennial drank coffee and fed birds.  We came out when it got choppy and hung out for a while, enjoying bird politics and chatting.  It looked like a storm was coming in around five thirty, so we took techie millennial home.  Head Millennial prepped the kitchen for Stove exchange and made us pancakes to eat while watching what we do in the shadows.

It was a good day.  The storm missed us alas, so I still had trouble with my sinuses today, and the sky was cloudless and starting to turn the wrong colour when I took my sandals downtown.  It was a massive relief to see a mid-thirties millennial with a nose ring running the counter while the Elderly gentlemen who's run the place since long before I moved here was working in the back.  I worried about him during the pandemic and very much hoped he was okay.  I also worried there would be no one to take over the trade when the Boomer era shoe repair guy retired.  We have lost so much in this town in the last three years.  The fish store that was a local institution burned down the Autumn before the plague.  A ton of small businesses died in the last two years.  This summer, the elderly couple that ran the open air produce store retired and another institution is gone, but there is the tiny shoe repair place and the handmade sweet shop run by an equally ancient couple next door to it was open, though there was no point in me doing more than gaze longingly at it, since I can't chew anything.  They survived!  Something good survived!

Poor Squirrel is still sleeping on the sofa and occasionally napping in my room in the evening when I'm not using it.  The Cats find this deeply disturbing.  Tavy keeps Gargoyling on the sofa back to stare at Squirrel while he sleeps and both he and the Empress keeping checking squirrel's room in disbelief off and on all day because he's supposed to be there.  Livia has decided to pretend Squirrel is not sleeping in weird places so she ignores him and subtly avoids him when he is in the wrong place.

I am just having a ton of trouble with my body.  It is all chronic illness stuff made so much worse by heat and air quality every time I need to leave the safe, filtered bubble of the cat asylum and all the stress and drama around food and my teeth.  I keep having to go to bed very early without much warning.  I am falling drastically behind again sigh.

My Gothy heart longs for Autumn for all the usual reasons, but also because of all the ways climate change has complettely borked the local weather patterns.

[serenityseventeen]

Love & Letter: To The Thirteen Boys I've Loved Before

The Second Letter

----------------

To: Yoon Jeonghan

From: Y/N

Dear Jeonghan,

I hope everything's going well with you, wherever you are. I'm writing you a letter without knowing where you are so even if I did ever decide to send this letter, I wouldn't know where to mail it.

Are you doing well? Why don't you call me? Contact me somehow? Why don't you say something to me? Don't you have anything you want to say to me? Oh right, you don't have my number. I don't know any of your social media accounts and you don't know any of mine. I can search on Facebook for you, through a thousand different “Yoon Jeonghan” profiles, but what would be the point?

Actually, I'm angry with you. I'm really angry and I'm a bit heartbroken too because you just took my heart and left.

Why didn't you tell me beforehand?

I waited for you to return. I spent the rest of my freshman year waiting and I even waited through my summer break, hoping that maybe you'd come back or send a letter. School starts in a month and you still aren't here. I don't know what I feel toward you anymore because you're gone. Do I love you since I'm angry at you like this?

From the first day we met, I could tell we didn't match. I don't even know why you pursued me. You joined the basketball team and whenever you had games, you wanted me to come to watch. I didn't know why so I refused the first few games.

We had many classes together, you know that. Did you use the advantage of being in the same classes as me to try to get to know me? What were your intentions when you asked me if I had lunch? Why did you always ask my friends if I was eating well?

I have so many questions I'm dying to ask now that you're gone. One day you were laughing, joking with me while I watched you practice basketball and the next day you suddenly disappeared. One day of absence turned into months, then half a year. I didn't want to ask but I was dying to know.

Then, the answer finally came.

You moved?

Why didn't you tell me anything?

I thought we were developing something special, was that only me? I thought that you liked me, that's why you did so many things to me, making my heart race and pound. Am I wrong?

If I am wrong, why did you do it?

Maybe I'm completely getting the wrong idea and the sudden move wasn't your fault. I bet that it wasn't your fault. I'm just angry that you didn't inform me. Not everyone moves houses in one day, it takes a lot of planning, doesn't it?

Now I'm just left here, confused.

Now I'm just left here, reminiscing about my second love that disappeared. I'm still remembering the first day we met when you bumped into me at the stairs and held me to keep me from falling backward.

Jeonghan, just, where did you go?

I know this message will never reach you anyway, anyhow, so I'll tell you this much.

Because of you, I changed. Hanging out around a mischievous guy like you made me pick up your habits. Before I knew it, I was playing small pranks on my dad and enjoying it, just like when you and I teamed up to prank the gym teacher into thinking that he had sat on a freshly painted bench. I can still remember how long I laughed because of it.

I still have the pen that you forgot when you were here to study with me. My father constantly asks me where you are and I always reply that I don't know because I don't know.

You came by twice every week for three months because you wanted me to tutor you. I don't know if I became a sheep to you but even though I knew you were gifted intelligent, I tutored you anyway. Jeonghan, you were one of those people who didn't need to study to ace a test. Even your methods of trickery are intelligent.

So as I reminisce, I also wonder why you would do something like that if you didn't like me. You were the one who told me that all men act like this, wanting to be around someone, making up excuses to stay close, and doing things they won't normally do if they like someone. Was that all a trick, Jeonghan?

Not only did you study with me but you studied the times that my dad was gone and came by when he wasn't here. You were respectful toward my dad and kind too, so I wondered how you could have such a naughty nature but at the same time be so caring.

It was one of those days when my dad went to work that you came over. Look, I was so confused that's why I kept stuttering. I knew that you weren't supposed to be at my house at that time of night so we stayed on the porch, gazing at the fallen sky. What were you thinking about? You stared for a long time and didn't say a word. It was the middle of winter too and you came by with your hands tucked in your puffy black jacket with your nose cutely red. You remember this night, don't you? If you don't, I'd go even more nuts than I did.

Why did you kiss me that night?

I mean, we weren't even talking, just gazing at the sky where stars were barely visible. Then all of a sudden, you said, “Look at me.”

I turned to you and then all of a sudden, you kissed me. I honestly didn't expect to get a kiss this early in my life and for it to be from you, the second love who disappeared, I can't be any more disappointed.

Jeonghan, the thief.

Your lips were cold at first but then they grew warm. I'm also sorry if I didn't know how to kiss. I just went with the flow and followed the way your thin lips moved against mine. Your hand also touched my neck as you kissed me, I could still feel the warmth of it lingering on my skin.

After you left that night after kissing me quietly, making my heart burn in the cold night, you stroked my hair. I ran inside my room and rolled on my bed, wanting to scream on my bedsheets because my lips have finally been pressed against another man. A boy that I liked at that.

How about you?

Do you think about that night at all?

It was about two days before you moved away.

Strangely, the next days, you continued to talk to me as if you didn't kiss me the days before. I was confused but since I was naive, I just believed that's how it went for everybody.

Also, because of that kiss, I began to notice your gaze. Maybe I could have noticed something in those two days before your departure. I just remember seeing you gazing at me with different eyes. I want to believe that you had fallen for me, but because of you, I'm being delusional like this.

The only way to know is when you finally decide to speak it true somewhere and it reaches me.

In this letter to you, I just can't help expressing the emotions I'm feeling. I have nowhere else to rant and I need you to know about my feelings though you'll never receive this letter.

Gosh, writing this letter makes me remember the weekend that you took me biking on a couple bicycle. Why did you ask me to go with you when you were leaving the next day? It's not like you at all. Knowing you for those short six months, you would have just told me with a pitiful face, “I'm going to move.”

Instead, you kissed me and decided to take me biking. I can still remember that grin on your face when you came to my house and said, “Hop on, Y/N.”

The wind that hit my face that day was amazing and my heart was racing just to have my hands around your waist.

Because of you, I became rebellious for the first time. I never disobeyed my father. He told me to go buy groceries that day and I went on a bike ride with you, enjoying the chilly winter breeze and ditching groceries. When we arrived at the basketball court, I watched and played a bit of basketball with you. Do you know what that means, Jeonghan?

Were you aware this whole time of my feelings? I know you can read other people's expressions well.

I can't understand you, Jeonghan. I don't think I ever will unless you come back and tell me.

I won't believe what any of your friends say even if it's the only source I have. ‘You moved away because a different high school was giving you bigger opportunities’, how am I supposed to believe that? In the middle of the school year?

Now, all I can do is sigh.

I won't wait for you anymore. That's why I'm just going to leave it. I loved you. Now, you're just one of the boys I've loved. I'm not going to spend the rest of my summer waiting to find a needle in a haystack.

I'll remember how I loved you. I'll remember how you changed me. I'll remember how loving you changed me.

I'll wonder sometimes about what we could have been if you didn't leave. If you didn't leave, I think I would have still been in love with you. Now, I'm pretty sure I would still be in love with you, at least for a little longer.

Please, send me a letter.

I know the chances are low.

I'm still angry at you for not telling me. If you did like me and think you did it for our own good, you're wrong. At least I wouldn't have had to wait and worry for the weeks that you disappeared that your life's clock stopped ticking. If you did tell me beforehand, I would have known that you'd be fine and that you were just moving away.

Did you have no faith in us?

Or did you really find a better opportunity in a better high school somewhere far away?

I'm still angry.

Is this what you call ‘the one that got away’?

Anyway, I don't love you now, but if you come back, I might again. I can't make up my mind.

I miss you, Jeonghan.

Sincerely,

Y/N

-------------------

© serenityseventeen

6/18/21 - 9:51 pm

a/n: SEVENTEEN back on Instagram?? Seungcheol, Minghao, Vernon, Joshua, and Seungkwan posted today/yesterday. I didn't even notice WOOZI changed his profile picture. Also, I find Seungkwan and Seungcheol so funny...

SC: you are my escape

SK: you are my s.coups

But yay? Seventeen is back on Instagram!

[thenextchapter22]

Mail Order… Kitten Girl

Part 4: Demons?!

Description: Satan accidentally orders a special type of ‘cat’ online after having a few too many drinks…

Tags: Past Abuse, Past Non/Con, Slavery, Pet Play, Cat Hybrids, Fluff, Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content

Pairing(s): Reader/Everyone (but Luke)

Link to my AO3: Click Here

Part One  Part Two  Part Three

+++++ MINORS DNI +++++

You had been given clothes first. Asmo, the flirty one, lead you to his bedroom. It smelled like flowers, and fruit, and while it was nice it was a little overwhelming to your senses at first.  

“Here, sit on the bed and I’ll grab some clothes for you,” he said softly, and sat you on the edge of the bed. You cared not that you were as nude as the day you were born, and he didn't either. It was typical of Kitten Girls to be so and you had been trained for it; Master’s liked their Kitten’s ready at all times.  

Asmo disappeared into his walk-in closet, and you looked around the room, bouncing on the bed. It was soft and warm, you wanted to sleep in it.

“Ah, here, this should fit you perfectly!”  

You jumped as he emerged from his closet. He had a few pieces of cloth in his arms, and they all looked cozy and you even saw a pair of fuzzy socks. You had never had those before. This was a real treat you would take advantage of.  

He sat on the bed next to you, smiled at you again and thus giving your body slight shivers. Something in his eyes made you feel pleasant.  

You waited for him to do something, but he seemed to be admiring your face. The staring was nerve wrecking. “You’re very beautiful, little kitty,” he eventually stated. “Can I pet your ears?”  

You blushed, but nodded. "You can,” you softly spoke in the quiet room.  

He squealed. His fingers were delicate on your head, and he scratched in the right places before he carefully stroked over your ears. Such a gentle touch, and he made sure to be slow about it. You found your eyes closing in contentment.  

When he stopped after a minute, you pouted. And you realized you’d been purring, too, which made your cheeks burn. You curled your tail around your waist and squeezed, a distraction you had done over the years to get out of your own head.  

He giggled. “I think you should get dressed. Then we can go to see what Beel made for you to eat.” Asmo handed you the stack he’d set on his side. “You can change here, or go into my closet. Whatever makes you feel more comfortable.”  

You shrugged. You were already nude. This was one of your Masters’ rooms after all. Putting on clothes within the first hour of being here was strange, but if it was what they wanted…  

You slipped on the underwear, cotton, and loose pants, also cotton, then the tank top and after that the sweatshirt. Everything was either pink or pink and glittery, but not uncomfortable. You had to adjust the pants to make them a little lower so it could be freed. You sat back down and put the socks on. You felt so warm and soft, almost sleepy. But Asmo said food was next, so you kept your eyes open and looked to him for what to do.  

He smiled, and his eyes sparkled. “Good. Let’s go to the kitchen,” he said, and took your hand to lead you out of the room.  

_+_  

The kitchen was packed with people. You hadn’t ever been around so many in one room in a very long time. You counted and they were all there, all the men from before in the first room, probably to because they wanted to see you. They stared at you, almost ogling but not quite, and then went back to doing whatever else they were doing.  

You followed Asmo to the center of the room, and glanced around, taking in the many different types of machines and types of food all over. Some of it looked quite strange, but you supposed that you hadn’t been in an actual kitchen in a while. It was mostly served to you in your rooms, or in a cafeteria style.  

“She looks cozy, Asmo,” said the sleepy-looking one. He sat on a bar top with a spotted pillow, his head pressed down into it. His head tilted sideways so he could speak clearly.  

“Thank you Belphie. I wanted our new darling to be cute and comfortable,” he said proudly.  

You looked down at your feet, sliding them on the tiled floor. It was fun, like skating. You smiled and did it again, and then sucked in a breath when you bumped into a solid chest.  

You backed up and put your head down, shaking. “S-s-sorry,” you stuttered.  

There was a large hand on your head, and you ‘oof’ed. “Don’t worry about it.”  

You glanced up to see a large red-headed man, the one from before that mentioned food. He grinned at you. “Your hair is soft, and so are your ears.”  

Blushing, you said, “Thank you,” quietly, again. So far, they hadn’t told you to be quiet, so you hoped you would be able to speak a little more here. It was nice to hear your own voice.  

“So, what did you make for her, Beel?” asked the white-haired man. He stood over the red-head, Beel, who was cooking in a large pot on the stove.  

“A simple broth soup. Not sure what’s she’s eaten before, so something lighter will be good.”  

You inhaled, and sighed. It smelled salty and sweet, and the rich aroma made your stomach growl.  

The men all laughed. You hid your face in one hand, and your other flickered with the tip of your tail in nervous habit.  

“Well, I assume she’ll like it from that noise,” Lucifer stated with a smirk.  

Beel turned his head and smiled. “It’s ready.”  

You were the only one who ate (but you did see Beel sneak some, but it wasn’t your place to speak against a Master). It was nerve-wrecking, but you didn’t care. It tasted so good. You drank the entire bowl and had seconds, and Beel seemed glad to dish it out. Then you sighed in delight and purred, licking your lips and cleaning your fangs with your tongue.  

Lucifer let you settle for a minute before he spoke. “Now that you’ve eaten, I think we should all take a seat in the common room and talk.”  

Everyone got settled on the sofas and chairs in the next room. It was a nice little set up, books and a fireplace, and soft light from the lamps surrounding the furniture. You made to sit on the floor closest to Lucifer, because no one permitted you to sit on the couches, but he gave you a look and pointedly glanced at the open seat beside the white-haired man.  

You sat obediently and straightened your back.  

He cleared his throat. “I think we should all start with introductions. I’m Lucifer, the eldest brother.”  

The one beside you moved frantically in his seat and grinned. “Oi, I’m Mammon, the second oldest and the Greatest!”  

There was silence, aside from some beeping, and you looked up to see everyone glaring at the purple-haired man.  

“Levi!” a few of them shouted.  

He jumped and made a crazy noise. “W-what? Oh, I—I’m Leviathan, but just call me Levi, you normie.”  

You frowned. Did he insult you? There was no way to tell.  

A sigh from the blonde across from you with crossed legs. “My name is Satan. Pleased to meet you.” He smiled, and it was very sweet.  

“You know me, darling~ My name is Asmodeus, but I prefer Asmo,” he said with a flirty wink. You felt gooey on the inside looking in his pretty pink eyes, like he was entrancing you or something.  

The large man smiled. “I’m Beelzebub, but Beel works, too. Whatever you want.” He hit the sleeping one beside him, and sighed. “This is Belphegor, but just call him Belphie.”  

You looked around found them all staring at you.  They were all family, which was nice. All brothers. You twitched in your seat, their gazed almost pressuring you, and you didn’t know what they wanted to happen next. But then, they were introducing, so that meant…  

“I—I don’t… my name...” you didn’t go by any name, not anymore. “Just call me… Kitten.”  

They nodded, or smiled gently. They seemed to understand and respect that, and you almost cried with relief and happiness. Your new Masters were so kind.  

Lucifer clapped his gloved hands together. “Well, we should get you a room then. I also want to let you know one more thing, seeing as you are part Human and are probably unaware.”  

He went on to explain that they were all… demons. And you were in a place called the Devildom.  

You laughed. You hadn’t laughed in so long, and it felt good. “You—ha—you are—haha,” you couldn’t even speak, the idea was so absurd. It was totally wrong of you to laugh at your Masters but you could not help yourself.  

Yes, you were part cat, but that was just genetics, this was an entire Heaven/Hell, and God and the Devil thing. That was no way true. If so, God would not have allowed you to go through what you did. Because if he did, then what kind of God was he?  

Lucifer was pissed off. “You dare to laugh?”  

Then, an unspeakable event happened. Smoke appeared, black and wild, all around him. And you looked and saw several types of smoke appearing around your other Masters as well. The sleeping one was no long asleep, and had his own smoke covering.  

Once it cleared, seconds later, they had drastically changed…  

Horns of different shapes on all of their heads. Tails or wings, fluttering about. Fangs, sharper than yours, prominent on their grinning or sly smirking lips. Outfits with chains, leather, and flamboyant colors, jewelry that sparkled and gleamed. It was magical, and insane.  

You paled, and opened your mouth to scream. “DEMONS?!!”  

_+_  

You were panicking. This was not happening. You were sent to Hell? Did you die? Demons were all around you, and they looked so scary. Big and demanding presences all over the room.  

There would be pain, and torture. Blood. Again, blood, but this time worse than before. Because a paddling from a human you could take, but what about torture from demons?  

They were  not human . They were evil.  

Lucifer’s wings were huge, and black. Levi had a serpent’s tail, and you pictured it around your neck. Mammon’s chest was bare, marked with white, and he looked so strong. The list went on and on, scarier and scarier, you started to hyperventilate. You barely had a chance to look at anyone else, too frightened to open your eyes.  

“Calm down.”  

The hand on your arm made you scream, and you pushed away whoever touched you. You fell to the floor on your knees, and held your hands over your ears which were flat on your head.  

“She’s shaking, what should we do?” asked Mammon.  

“I believe we should start by shifting back, so she isn’t quite so frightened of us.”  

“Good thinking, Satan,” Beel responded.  

They were talking, but you barely heard them. You rocked yourself, hoping to comfort yourself in the motion.  

There was a rush of air around you, then a pressure over your body, and you moved your hands from your head to grab the fabric. It was a blanket, thin but still soft. You rubbed it, the sensation soothing you a little.  

“Kitten, you can open your eyes now, it’s all right.” Lucifer’s voice rang out.  

You inhaled, exhaled, and did just that. They were normal again. Or rather, disguised as normal.  

There was a hand in your face, and a Kleenex. You took the offered tissue from Asmodeus, and wiped your eyes and nose.  

“W-where am I?”  

“You’re in the Devildom, sweetheart,” Asmo replied with a sort of pitying look.  

After you sat back on the sofa in the corner, blanket secured over you, Lucifer explained what the Devildom was, and who they were, and the entire time you were listening with apt attention. You were so amazed by it all, until he said ‘Demon’s’ again and then you freaked out.  

“W—will you h-hurt me?” you murmured.  

A soft hand on your hair behind your ears, it was Satan standing beside you. He smiled and shook his head. “No, Kitten, we won’t hurt you.”  

You leaned into his touch, and he scratched around your ears. You sighed. That was nice.  

“Are you… g-gonna to keep me?”  

“If that’s what you want.”  

What…  you  want? You got to decide? You swallowed and nodded. “Please. I’d like to stay… masters.”  

They all grinned at you, and cheered.  

“Yes, this is going to be so fun, I’m going to set a beauty routine for us with face masks and everything, oh and your claws are perfect to paint, what do you think of the color pink?”  

“She’s too skinny, we need to feed her more. I’ll look up what cats eat.”  

“Beel, she’s not just a cat, she’s human, too. Look up human world recipes so we don’t poison her.”  

“Oh, right. Thanks, Belphie.”  

“I’m gonna teach her sooo much!”  

“Eew, Mammon, don’t be such a perv.”  

“Oi, Levi! I was talkin’ ‘bout Poker, not anythin’ sexual! Satan, help me out here!”  

“You dug your own grave, Mammon. We all knew you’d be the one.”  

“W-what does that mean!?”  

You giggled into your hands. They were all so cute, and you curled into the blanket and listened to the chaotic brothers argue about what to do with you. For Demons, they acted like normal people. Well, what you remembered a family of normal people acted like.  

Lucifer was watching you, and you looked back at him. He gave you an exasperated look, and you purred into the blanket and sighed.  

This was your home now. These were your Masters. Demons, but still... They were yours.  

[x0401x]

Jeweler Richard Fanbook Short Story #14

Feel free to message me about possible corrections, and please consider supporting the creators by purchasing digital copies of the official releases: Novel || Manga || Fanbook. In case anyone is feeling generous: Ko-fi | PayPal. ( ╹◡╹)っ’･*

← Previous || Index || Next →

Santa Invasion

“What’s this?”

“Ice cream.”

“Well, I can tell that much just by looking, but...”

“To be precise, it is an ice cream cake.”

A gigantic ladybug was sitting on the low table. Its vivid red and dark brown-like black shades were definitely berries and chocolate. The back was decorated with flowers like marguerite. It was adorable. And huge. It was a hemispherical cake that looked like a basket ball cut in half, the name of a store from Dogenzaka printed on its box. It was 7PM. The last customer had left, I was done with the cleaning and all we had left to do was closing the store. It was still the second week of December, so the mayhem of making provisions for winter presents was a few ways ahead, but the number of clients was increasing little by little.

Just what on earth would this beautiful jeweler come up in such times?

Due to a habit of his from whenever he had something that was hard to say aloud and thus failed to speak up, Mr. Richard Ranashinghe de Vulpian had a serious crease forming just slightly between his brows. It made me feel at ease. This guy didn’t make a face like this when he was burdened with something that was actually difficult to say. He would speak more bland and expressionlessly instead.

“This is a little souvenir.”

“Are you going to a customer’s place after this?”

Richard’s reply was a gentle “no” in English.

He’d been often speaking a mix of Japanese and English lately. When English-speaking customers came by, he would switch completely to English as if for practical assessment, so I was desperate just to keep up with listening to them. I was grateful for having him as my English conversation teacher.

“A certain good-for-nothing who works with finances is currently in Japan, so...”

“Ah, Jeffrey-san, is it? He seemed so busy last time... Sorry, forget what I just said.”

“No need. That is a correct interpretation, so it is nothing to apologize about.”

Despite saying this, Richard’s facial expression did not seem even remotely satisfied as he swiftly took an indigo envelope out of his pocket. It had no seal, so it must have been handed over to him. The content was a pop-out card, and under a paper-craft cake colored with gold leaves and uneven printing, it was written in very tasteful Japanese: “I’m going to hold a party at the hotel, so come over. I’ll be waiting.” The date of the party was today and the place was the room of a luxury hotel in Tokyo. A home party? No, a hotel party.

The title was “Richard’s birthday party”. The plate of the pop-up cake didn’t say “Merry Christmas”. It said “Happy Birthday”.

Christmas Eve on the 24th was this beautiful shopkeeper’s birthday.

As I returned the card to him, a crease once again formed between Richard’s brows as he said with an unsparingly decisive tone, “How very embarrassing.”

“Doesn’t seem so much like it from your face.”

“Because I practiced making it. But this is extremely embarrassing. I think it is not something that warrants going through the trouble of arranging a plane ticket.”

“I wonder if anyone else will be going.”

“It seems Chieko will attend. I received an e-mail yesterday saying, ‘I am going to show up as a surprise so please take care of me’.”

“Is that even a surprise? Well, okay.”

Chieko-san was Richard and Jeffrey’s private tutor in the past and I was acquainted with her to some degree. I wondered if Homura-san, who had married her daughter, was also coming. No, not happening. He was a customer of Etranger, so Richard would probably feel abashed if he did so.

“If it goes on like this, the people lying in wait in that room will just gang up into an assembly to celebrate me.”

“What even is ‘ganging up to celebrate’?”

“They are ganging up on me. I likely will not be able to say anything other than ‘thank you very much’. I need reinforcements. If you would like, could you come with me?”

“Me too? That okay?”

“Of course. The party starts at 8PM probably because it coincides with Etranger’s closing hours. That British safe-like man is not narrow-minded enough to leave you out.”

It was written there that the party would begin at 8PM. We had 30 minutes. There was no spare time to make a pudding. What to do? What should I do?

Richard was apparently unable to let my groaning an “ngh, ngh” while deep in thought go unnoticed. “If it is impossible for you, just say so right away. I know that you are at the final stage of studying for your exams.”

“That doesn’t matter. Why didn’t you tell me a bit earlier about this? If I knew, I could’ve made preparations for it... Aah, is that why?”

“It is. I recall saying that you should refrain from being overly distracted.”

“I don’t think a ‘celebration’ is ‘overly distracting’, though.”

“Anything is fine, so please answer. Will you come or not?”

He didn’t have to go as far as asking me something like that.

I bowed in a way that wouldn’t cause any hairs to fall onto the ice cream ladybug. “I shall humbly accompany you.”

“Very well.”

“Sorry, but before that, I gotta go to the toilet for a bit.”

I hastily rushed to Etranger’s restroom and unlocked my phone in a flash. I then tapped on the e-mail app. Of course, the destination could only be one person.

“Help. I’m sorry but I just got informed about the birthday party, so I have no present.”

Jeffrey-san.

The contents of the message were not at all on a level that someone should send to the person they owed their life to, but he would understand.

The reply came in a matter of seconds. As expected, he worked fast.

“Good evening. I have everything, so there’s no problem if you come empty-handed. There will be champagne, canapés, chicken pie and cake, and I plan to have chocolate fondue coming up at the end.”

There was a proud smiley emoji at the end of the text. It seemed this was going to be a big deal.

Richard would probably have work tomorrow, and he wasn’t the type to get wasted or stuff his face with sweets in the middle of the night. It seemed I also wouldn’t have to worry about dinner. It made me feel sorry. This was the same old pattern. This course of eating and seeing good stuff amidst the confusion of the moment made my stomach hurt when I thought better about it.

“Don’t you know anything that Richard wanted?”

The response came after a moment, “My bad, but nothing comes to mind. How about you give him what you want most?”

What I wanted most. I could only think of refill shampoo and new socks. I’d be ashamed of giving things like that to Richard. After all, this was a mixture of birthday and Christmas party—

Just as I was thinking this, a genius inspiration sprouted in my head. It wasn’t the best solution. Not at all. But I felt it could work. This was too obvious, but if only I had the necessary materials for it, I could do it immediately.

Making up my mind, I came out of the restroom, apologized for making Richard wait, and as we rode to the designated address on the jaguar, I had him stop the car in front of a mass retailer for a moment. I told him I wanted to buy refill shampoo for my home. Richard was exasperated, but didn’t have any suspicions in particular.

We arrived at the hotel, got into the elevator, and on the way to the party venue, I made sure to walk a bit behind Richard. Staying out of his sight was essential.

When he opened the door to the suite, sure enough, Jeffrey-san and Chieko-san were waiting inside. Giving off a relaxed atmosphere, a room-service feast even bigger than what I had imagined from the phone call was waiting on the table for the main guest.

“Happy birthday, Richard. Chieko’s here too. Surprised?”

“Of course. Very surprised. Extremely.”

“Hmm, by the looks of it, I guess there was some information leak. Well, that’s okay! Where’s Nakata-kun?”

“What do you mean ‘where’? He’s right here. Seigi... Seigi?”

My eyes locked with Richard’s. I had locked them with Jeffrey-san’s before that. I was grateful that he had done me the favor of not laughing.

I politely shook my head at my boss, who was making a flabbergasted face. “My name is Santa.”

What I had bought at the mass retailer was a handy Santa makeover set. The three-piece set consisted of a hat, a put-on beard and a Santa costume, but I hadn’t had time to change into the costume, so it was folded up in my bag. I intended to borrow the suite’s bathroom to put on the costume. If I at least had my face ready, I could somehow make it work.

Richard was dumbfounded. It was the obvious reaction. But I wanted him to forgive me for this. After all, it was December and today was a party day.

“I’m Santa Claus! I came from the North Pole. Please take care of me for today!” After introducing myself, I thought that maybe this wasn’t an exemplary self-introduction for Santa, but it was already too late.

Jeffrey-san, who completely livened up the mood whenever he got excited, went along with the joke, saying, “Wah, Santa-san, thank you for coming from such a faraway place!”

I was grateful for that one. And that was how I got away with playing the role of a worldwide mascot-like old man character from the Arctic for the day. The ice cream cake brought by the star of the party was a success, and we had a toast with both champagne and royal milk tea. Chieko-san was wearing a kimono, the remade peridot brooch on her chest.

   It had already been more than half a year since then, but to my body, it felt like even longer ago.

My location had moved from Japan to Sri Lanka, as one would expect, and I was busy fully enjoying a spring in which white temple flowers were blooming in Kandy, my new home. But for some reason, Santa was here. A beautiful blond, blue-eyed man slipped in and out of sight, but his outward appearance was that of Santa Claus. It was the kind of Santa costume that you could buy at the costume section of any mass retailer. One of the sad things about unmatched beauty was the fact nobody could actually claim that his natural beauty was ruined by the look. The brilliance of his blue eyes, which looked like they could suck you in, was the same as ever.

“I am Santa Claus. I came from the North Pole.”

“But now’s a hot time of the year.”

“Santa Claus is a symbol of summer in the Southern Hemisphere. I do not think it is particularly strange.”

“T-That might be true. Well, then... what’re you doing?”

“Santa does what Santa does. The tradition of Santa Claus, much like the language of jewels, has a wide variety of legends to it depending on the region, but either way, the role of a saint who grants blessings to little children, women and those in need is a guise commonly demanded in society. And for you, here it is.” Saying this, “Santa” offered me a plastic, loose stone display case that I was all too familiar with. There was a red stone stuck between the cushion and transparent lid. “Can you identify this gemstone?”

“Tourmaline, I guess. Red tourmaline.”

“Good for you. Did you know that it has one more name?”

“Rubellite.”

“Perfect. Large, pinkish-red tourmalines are called by that name, and it is a stone of which huge carved crystals have been loved as works of art, such as the amulet of Empress Dowager Cixi and the Romanov royal treasure, the ‘Strawberry Pendant’.”

As I peeked at the stone inside the case, humming that it was pretty, the beautiful jeweler cleared his throat and started over.

“Just as people’s feelings dwell within beautiful stones, this one is filled with the feeling of celebrating the start of your new life, from your family back in Japan, your friends and your superior at work, with whom you have a relationship other than the aforementioned and that neither of us knows how to define. Santa is wholly thankful for being in the position to bestow you with such a gift. I forgot to say it, but happy birthday. Nakata Seigi-san. I sincerely pray, all the way from my home in the Arctic, that this year will be a fruitful one for you.”

“Thank you. Seriously, thank you for always, Richa...”

“Santa. I am a passing Santa.”

“Then let’s go with that. By the way, if you’re Santa, where are the reindeers?”

When asked this, the man in disguise answered with a cool gaze that the reindeers were using stealth technology nowadays so that they wouldn’t be found by radars, hence they couldn’t be seen. He had it down to the details.

“It’s been about ten years since the last time Santa-san came around. I’ll take good care of this. Santa-san, you take care of your body too. I’ll ask my boss next time I see him about the person who gave you this stone.”

“You should. Well, then.” With a bow, Santa left for a car parked in the courtyard. I probably wasn’t supposed to see him off. I’d feel bad for the stealth reindeers.

The red stone stayed in my hand.

I had told a white lie. It hadn’t been ten years since Santa had last showed up. This was the first time ever since I was born. In my home, there was always someone playing the role of “Santa”, such as Hiromi, Grandma and Nakata-san, so they never tried to tell me nice lies. Nakata-san probably just followed Hiromi’s way of doing things, though. The fact I thought up something like that last December, when Jeffrey asked me what I “wanted most”, might not have been unrelated to this. At any rate, to me, not even once was there any supernatural existence who would leave toys by my bedside if I were a good kid. Until this day.

After a while of standing by the garden, where it was always summer, and listening closely to the cries of birds with my eyes closed, I unlocked my phone. The Wi-Fi range of the house seemed good, and so I could send e-mails immediately. The contents were simple. The destination was my boss, Richard.

“Santa came to my place. But he left so quick that I couldn’t make him tea.”

The reply soon came: “Are you half-asleep?”

If he really thought that I was half-asleep, then maybe I should delay the reply for a few more minutes, I thought, but I didn’t write anything further. The house’s cleaning was half-assed and I had to check the security. I also wanted to know as many of my neighbors as could.

Together with the feeling that I had suddenly been given something I had forgotten, and that I didn’t even know I had forgotten, I put rubellite in the jewelry safe and stepped out into the Sri Lankan provincial city. I had nothing to fear and no hesitation. The ill feeling that I’d be living here alone had disappeared. After all, Santa had come by. Far from elementary school, I was now an adult who had already graduated from university, and it currently wasn’t December but May, where the only anniversary I could think of was my own birthday, yet Santa had come by. Such an impossible thing had happened.

So I could do my best, I thought.

And so, I could be getting ahead of myself, but I began thinking about my plans for this December. Would there be a second chance for Santa to appear? If not, I wanted to make one. I decided to fuss over the outfit a little more and prepare proper gifts this time. Then I’d tell him stories about jewels and try to make him laugh a lot. That, too, was Santa’s duty.

[spicyteez]

Deal

Smut

Gang Boss (+ Sugar daddy) San x Fem Reader 

Word Count: 6.1k

Warnings: There’s a lot. Idk, Sir kink, dirty talk, sensory deprivation, oral (m & f receiving), clit slapping, spanking, choking, multiple positions, dom! san (not too wild though), cum eating. I hope I didn’t miss anything 

A/N: Hello lovelies! This is my first smut and I hope it isn’t trash. I’ve been quite sick recently so this might not be good at all, but I hope you like it nonetheless :) I tried to proofread it, but I am sorry for any mistakes. 

Forty thousand dollars. That's how much debt your father left behind. By your calculations it would take years, maybe even decades to pay it back with your meager salary. Sure, owning your own bakery had always been a dream of yours, but business had been slowing down considerably. Letting out a sigh, you pushed the papers aside and moved to help a customer who had just entered. 

“How may I help you? You put on a happy face despite hoping the man would leave quickly

“Miss y/n?” His deep voice echoed throughout the empty shop. You had to be honest, the man intimidated you a bit. Clad completely in black and quite tall, his penetrating gaze gave you an unsettling feeling. 

“This is her.” You tried your best to keep your voice from shaking. 

“There is someone who’d like to talk to you concerning your father’s debt.” The smile fell from your face and you frowned slightly. 

“Who?” 

“Come with me.” Shakily, you took off your apron and instructed your employees to close up for the day.

You followed the man out the door and towards a black car parked across from your store. This was crazy. Should you even trust this man? He could be leading you off to murder you for all you knew. Opening the door for you, the man allowed you to slide in before closing the door and moving to the driver’s seat. 

“Don’t worry.” His eyes found yours in the rear view mirror. “I’m not going to hurt you.” 

Nodding your head in response, you tore your eyes away from his and looked out the window. It did you no good, however, as you realized that the windows were blacked out. You sat in the car for twenty minutes, wondering where the man could possibly be taking you. The car came to a stop and you took in your surroundings. An empty parking lot sat before you with crumbling and abandoned buildings littering the outskirts. He had taken you to the edge of town. Nothing resided here except for criminals and… gangs. Your door opened and you jumped in surprise. Looking up at the man, you swallowed the lump in your throat. 

“Come on,” His demanded gruffly. Quickly, you scrambled from the car and stood before him on shaky legs. “Follow me.” He lead you across the parking lot and down an old cement staircase towards a group of high rise buildings. Struggling to keep up with his long strides, you hopped over the shattered remnants of a revolving glass door. After maneuvering your way across the ground floor, you made your way up a rickety staircase guarded by two men. They gave the man a nod and he began his climb up the staircase. When you reached the top, you couldn’t help but gasp. While the rest of the building was in shambles, the second floor was in pristine condition. Intricate gold wallpaper adorned the walls and a grand chandelier hung from the ceiling. Rich mahogany lined the room and ran towards a door on the opposite end of the hall. 

The man gestured for you to keep up as he made his way towards the door. Knocking on the frame, he stood back when someone cracked it open. He leaned forward and whispered something you couldn’t catch. The door swung open and you were lead into a grand room filled with immeasurable luxuries. You stared in awe at the grandeur of the room, almost missing how the man had knocked on another door directly to your left. He spoke to someone inside the room, gesturing to where you were standing. 

“Good work, Mingi. Send her in.” 

The man, Mingi, stood aside so you could enter the room. Your palms began to sweat and you wondered what exactly you were in for. Stepping into the room, you saw the man Mingi had just spoken to. He sat at a desk and seemed to be studying a piece of paper. A stripe of silver ran through his slicked back ebony hair, attracting your gaze. His aura was strong, something you couldn’t ignore. Undoubtedly, he was powerful. When he looked up you froze, trapped under the weight of his gaze. His eyes left yours to scan your body, stopping when he met your eyes once again. A slight smirk played across his lips and he leaned back in his seat. 

“Y/n, I presume?” 

You nodded slowly, “Yes.” 

“Choi San,” He greeted you. “I heard you’re in a bit of a bind.” He tilted his head to the side and continued to look at you with his deep gaze. 

“That would be correct.” 

“You’ve come to the right place, Miss y/n. I can help you.” 

“How so?” He certainly looked powerful and wealthy, but what was the catch? 

“I knew your father.” 

How could he? You started at him in shock. There was no way your father would associate with someone like this.

“I assure you I’m telling the truth.” Standing from his desk, he slowly paced the room. “My father thought of him as a great friend, although he often disapproved of his spending habits.” He cocked his eyebrow at you. 

You tried to wrap your mind around it all. Maybe it was possible, your father had been a bit of a wildcard, hanging around strange places and spending exorbitant amounts of money. 

“Now I’m prepared to offer you a deal. Your father was a kind man and I'd hate to see his family suffer because of his actions. I’ll grant you the money and in return you grant me favors.”

Clearing your throat, you found your voice. “What type of… favors?” 

He looked up at you. “Sex.” Smirking at your sudden intake of breath, he continued. “We meet once a week and I pay you after each time. In five months, your debt will be paid and our deal will end.” 

“So-so you want to be my sugar daddy?” This whole thing was a little ridiculous. 

He chuckled. “Essentially, yes. I’ll give you a week to get me an answer.” 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Should you do this? 

Sure, you had contemplated finding a sugar daddy a few times, but a gang boss? Should you really fuck a man who had so much power? 

Checking the mail again, you weren’t surprised to find another notice from the bank. You had done all you could, but you were hundreds short of the payment due in less than a week. If you couldn’t come up with the money, you’d lose everything you had, including the bakery you’d worked so hard to start. Thinking the deal over for days, you had run through all the pros and cons several times. Maybe taking his deal was the only option. 

Steeling your nerves, you made a decision. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. You reached for the paper with the number Mingi had given you. Typing in the number, you pressed talk and held your breath. 

The line picked up and you felt your heart race. “Have you decided to accept?” A man’s voice spoke on the other end of the line. 

“Yes.” You spoke as confidently as you could. 

“Mr. Choi will send for you right away.” 

You stepped into his office once again less than an hour later. San sat at the desk as usual, wearing his same black attire. 

Without looking up, he spoke. “I hear you decided to take me up on my offer.” 

“Yep.” Rocking on your heels, you looked around the office. “They said you had a contract for me to sign.” 

“Have a seat.” Looking at you for the first time since you arrived, he gestured to a chair in front of him and set a piece of paper before it. 

Sinking into the plush fabric of the chair, you took the chance to observe him up close. He was attractive. Really attractive. You noticed details you weren't able to catch upon your first meeting, such as his fine jewelry and a line of freckles trailing down his neck. If anything, his presence was even more intimidating the closer you got to him.  

You took a moment to read over the paper, searching for anything unreasonable. Everything he had said was there, a five month agreement with the right amount stated. However, one line in particular caught you off guard. “Mr. Choi has the right to dictate the events of every meeting?” You looked at him for clarity. 

“It means that I’m in charge, sweetheart.” The same smirk graced his lips. 

“Really?” Folding your arms, you leaned back a little. 

“There will be a safe word in place of course, but I call the shots.” 

The idea sent a tingle down your spine. It had been a while since you had submitted to someone. Nodding your head, you thought it over for a moment. Hopefully this wouldn’t end badly. “Where do I sign?” 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Three days later was your first meeting. You anxiously adjusted your outfit as you waited for Mingi to come pick you up. It was only eight o'clock and you wondered just how long you'd be out. Your mind started racing, thinking about what he wanted to do to you. The thought of him touching you shouldn't have affected you as much as it did. 

The doorbell rang and you jumped. Opening the door, you gave Mingi a nod. "Let's go." 

Mingi noticed you fidgeting in your seat awkwardly as he drove you to your destination. "Are you nervous?" 

You stopped moving and looked up at him in the mirror. "No. Okay, maybe."

"Just a warning, he likes it kinda...Rough." he trailed off at the end and a faint blush covered his cheeks, almost matching the color of his fiery hair. The sight made you laugh a little and calmed your nerves a bit. 

"I actually think he's excited."

"Oh?" 

The thought of him being excited for your meetings had your insides heating up and sent an ache through your core. What girl doesn't dream of being fucked by a powerful and mysterious man? 

A few more minutes passed until Mingi led you into the building once again. This time however, instead of leading you to San's office, he took you further into the building until you stood before a set of french doors. 

"This is the master's suite. Knock when you're ready." You gave him a nod and he walked away quickly. 

Squaring your shoulders and taking a deep breath, you decided you were as ready as you would ever be and you knocked on the door. 

“Come in.” His voice, although muffled by the doors, sent shivers down your spine. Slowly, you pushed open one of the doors. 

Just as you had expected, the grandeur of the room was overwhelming. Everything from the massive bed with beautiful sheets and freshly fluffed pillows to the ornate chandelier hanging above the bed left you in awe. 

“Like what you see?” San walked into the room carrying a bottle of wine. Contrasting the harsher clothing you had seen him wearing during previous visits, he wore only a simple t-shirt and a pair of sweats, both of which were still his classic black. He looked relaxed and at ease, the only thing indicating otherwise was the bulge in his pants. You felt a little overdressed in the tight dress you had picked out, but from the way he was eyeing you, it might have been a good decision. 

“It’s beautiful.” You crane your head to take in the room once again. 

He chuckled faintly and the sound was like music to your ears. “Come here.” It took you a second to process his request, still looking around the room, and he called out again in a sterner tone. “Here.” Rushing to stand by him, you moved quickly as to not make him unhappy. “Sit down.” You complied and sat on the bed, looking up into his intense gaze. “There will be a few rules I expect you to follow each time you come over, understand?” He cocked his eyebrow at you and waited for you to nod. “You will address me as 'sir' at all times. If you fail to refer to me as so, you will be punished.” Looking at you again, he waited for your confirmation. When you gave him a simple nod again, he shook his head. “Use your words.” 

Gulping, you forced your tongue to move. “Yes S-sir.”

His signature smirk was back. “Good girl.” 

Your breath hitched and you felt your core grow wet at the pet name. “Second rule.You come up with the safe word every night. You will tell me at the beginning of each of our sessions. If you ever feel uncomfortable, don’t hesitate to use the word and I’ll stop.” 

“Yes Sir.” 

“And finally. No staying over. Mingi or another driver will take you home every night.” 

You agreed to his final rule and steadied yourself for what was to come. 

“Alright. Let’s begin.”  

He instructed you strip for him and lay on the bed as he walked to an adjacent room and searched around for a bit. Quickly, he returned with a box that he set down on the edge of the bed. As he took a second to scan your body, you noticed the way he bit his lip as he took in your bare form. “I’ll take things a little slow tonight, it wouldn’t be fair for me to jump right into it, would it?” 

“No, sir.” He nodded in approval at your response. 

You tried not to squirm under his scrutiny as he opened the box and pulled out three silk ties. So this is what he’s into. Placing the ties on the bed, he set the box on the floor and pulled his shirt over his head. Trying not to stare at the muscles in his back and chest, you scanned his lean body and had to admit that he was really well built. As he turned to face you again, you watched his movements as he approached you. “Can I touch you?” His eyes were softer when he looked at you, as if he was assuring you that you were in safe hands. 

“Please sir.” It may have sounded a little desperate, but you were aching to be touched. Watching the way his arms flexed as he moved around the room and the way he carried himself had you clenching around air. You needed him in you.

Running his fingers up your calf, he relished in the way you squirmed beneath his hands. Admittedly, this had been a fantasy of his since the day you walked into his office, the need to have you under his fingertips and to do with you as he pleased grew stronger each time he thought of you. “What’s the safe word?” 

You looked around the room and blurted out the first word that came to your mind. “V-velvet.”

“Velvet.” He purred. “Perfect.”  

Fingers reaching your knees, he spread your legs apart and gazed at your exposed core. You noticed the shift in his eyes, the already dark irises swimming with something heady and lust filled. Taking a single finger, he slid it up your slit, collecting your wetness. “You’re so wet for me. I didn't even need to touch you.” A mewl escaped your throat before you could stop it, and you fought the blush staining your cheeks. 

His eyes snapped to yours and your breath hitched. “Do that again.” This time he used brought two fingers to your soaked entrance, swirling over your sensitive clit before sliding inside you. You choked out a loud whimper and gasped as he began to curl his fingers upward. In no time, he hit a spot within you that had you seeing stars. He was eliciting long, drawn out moans from you as he continued and began to circle your clit with his thumb. Shaking and moaning, you bucked your hips up to meet his fingers. “That’s it. Get off on my fingers baby.” His words kindled a fire in your stomach and you quickly approached your high. “Cum for me. Cum on my fingers.” The words sent you over the edge and you threw your head back in a silent scream. He helped you to ride out your high, his fingers continuing to pump into you. Soon the pleasure turned unbearable and the sensation too uncomfortable. Your whines of pleasure turned to whines of overstimulation as he continued to push you past your limits. When the pain began to sink back into pleasure and as you felt another orgasm bubbling up, he pulled his fingers out and left you empty. You almost whined in frustration, missing the presence of his fingers immediately. 

Wiping your release on his sweatpants, he walked around to where he had laid the silk ties. Picking up one, he walked to the top of the bed and took your wrist into his hand. Tying the silk securely, he attached one end to the bedframe and the other to your wrist. Once he had tested to make sure the bond was strong, he moved to the other side of the bed and did the same to your other wrist. Walking to the middle of the room, he dropped his sweatpants and boxers, freeing his hardened length. He was bigger than you had figured after agreeing to the arrangement, and the memory of fantasizing about his dick brought redness to your cheeks. 

Running his hand from base to head, you gasped as he began to pump himself in his hand. Looking up at you with that same deep gaze, he made eye contact with you and you almost had to look away. Letting go of his cock, he moved towards you once more. Taking your chin in his hand, he kissed you harshly, letting his tongue invade your mouth and biting down hard on your lip as he pulled away. Struggling to catch your breath, you watched as he took the last silk strand and ordered you to lift your head. Tying the fabric behind your head, he was careful not to catch any of your hair in the knott. With your field of vision completely obstructed, you felt your senses launch into overdrive. You sensed him moving near you and you wanted nothing more than for him to reach out and touch you. Moments later, you felt the weight of his body settle on either side of yours on the bed. Without warning he rammed his cock into your abused slit and your body convulsed wildly at the sudden intrusion. You moaned wantonly, paying no heed to whoever could be listening. The way he hit so deep and filled you so good was the only thought on your mind as he thrusted into you over and over again. 

You weren’t going to last long, and he knew it too. Leaning down to tickle your ear with his lips, he encouraged you along. Every nerve ending was on fire, his scent along with the brush of his hair on your skin driving you mad. Deep and sultry in your ear, the slight hitch in his voice was the only indicator of the pleasure he was experiencing. “I know you’re close baby. Let go.” His words had the same affect on you and you fell over the edge again, clenching around his cock and moaning wildly. A groan escaped San’s lips and you decided it was perhaps the prettiest sound you had ever heard. 

As you came down from your high, you expected him to pull out and give you a moment to breathe. It would seem you were wrong from the way he continued to thrust into you, even faster if that was somehow possible. The feeling of overstimulation filled your senses again, heightened this time. You groaned at the sensation, needing him to stop, needing him to pull out. 

Breathing heavily, you pleaded with him to stop. “Sir.. please. Please stop. I-I can’t.”

“You can take more, can’t you baby? Take everything I give you.” He growled into your neck, his fingers coming to rub at your sensitive bundle of nerves. Crying out, you felt the pain ease into pleasure and the knot snap as a solid thrust hit your sweet spot. You clenched around him again wildly, this time throwing him over the edge as well. Hot ropes of cum painted your walls as he bit into your shoulder. Whining at the pain, you clenched around him again, milking his cock and riding him through his orgasm. 

When you both came down from your highs, panting heavily, he pulled out and the cold air hitting your pussy made you whimper. You felt sticky and gross and wanted someone to hold you as you came down from your post orgasm bliss. San gently untied your wrists, smoothing over where the silk had made indentations as you pulled against your bonds. He finished by slipping the makeshift blindfold from your eyes and the sight you were met with was not disappointing to say the least. His hair stuck to his forehead, damp from sweat and his chest heaved as he struggled to catch his breath. You wished you could stay there and watch him forever. 

“You did well. Get cleaned up, Mingi will be ready to go in five minutes. You’ll have the money within the hour.” 

He walked away from you, tossing you a towel and leaving you feeling empty. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day you could hardly walk, a reminder of the good fucking you had recieved the night before. As you tried to sleep, you couldn't stop thinking about how it felt to be touched and the way his voice sounded. You'd be lying if you said you weren't looking forward to your next session. 

As you limped into work that morning, you waved hello to your favorite employee, Jongho. He took in the poorly concealed bite mark on your shoulder and the way you waddled in and he began to smirk. "What's gotten into you? Or should I say who?" 

“Jongho. Don’t,” You warned him. He laughed at your response, enjoying his ability to joke with you. 

“Was he good though?” He asked you, an edge of seriousness creeping into his question. 

Letting out a sigh, you answered honestly. “Was it good? It was heavenly.” 

His face fell a little as you answered. You had always suspected he was harboring a little crush on you and you felt a little bad for talking about another guy. 

Regaining his composure, he grinned mischievously. “Heavenly. Wow. Must’ve been really good.”  

The next week you tried to play down your excitement when Mingi came to pick you up. Although he could tell there was something up. 

“Damn. The dick is really that good?” 

“Shut up.” You rolled your eyes at him, finding Mingi to be funnier each time you met him. 

In no time you were on San’s bed, naked with him between your legs. His tongue worked at your slit, alternating between quick sucks to your clit and long licks probing at your entrance. Your fingers moved to his hair without thinking and you tugged at the dark strands. Immediately you knew you had done something wrong. Halting his actions completely, he looked up at you with stern eyes. “What did I say, baby?” 

“No-no touching tonight.” Swallowing thickly, you watch him tilt his head to the side. 

“Have you forgotten how to address me? Say it again.” You swallowed again, trying to form the words. He grew impatient, landing a light slap to your clit. You mewled at the stimulation, fingers digging into the sheets. “I’m sorry Sir. It won’t happen again, Sir.” 

“It better not.” Diving back in, he continued with vigor, bringing you to the first of many orgasms that night.  

Time passed quickly, falling into a routine of work along with the added nights of pleasure. Your bakery picked up a little and profits were slowly getting better. 

If things were picking up at work, that was an understatement for how your nights with San went. You began to truly understand what Mingi meant when he said that San liked it “rough.” He was definitely into a lot of stuff, trying out a new kink almost every time you came over. From one extreme to the next, he loved pushing you to your limits. One night he would have you shaking from overstimulation, wracking your body with orgasm after orgasm. The next week he would have you begging for him to let you cum, taking you to the edge and pulling away for hours. Out of all the positions you’ve tried you had to admit classic missionary was your favorite. Feeling his body rest on yours as he pounded you into the mattress, looking into his dark eyes as he fucked you into oblivion, it felt so good. Sometimes he’d let you touch him and would allow you to wrap your arms around his solid shoulders or play with his hair. All of this was nothing you could admit to him of course, this was strictly a business arrangement. 

One night, halfway into the third month of your meetings, you arrived at his place at the scheduled time. Mingi had warned you that San wasn’t in a very good mood, something about how a rival gang leader had really pissed him off. You were waiting patiently in his room when he slammed the door open, causing you to jump. Throwing off his shirt, he sat down against the headboard and beckoned you to him. “Safeword?” He asked. Clearly he was beyond frustrated, his jaw was clenched and his eyebrows furrowed deeply. 

“Um.. Treasure.” You sat on the edge of the bed, ready for his command. 

“Treasure. Sure.” He nodded his head. “You have two minutes to make me cum.” Looking you dead in the eyes, his tone left no room for argument. 

The longer you had been with him, the more outspoken you had become, oftentimes loving the punishment. You decided to mess with him a bit. “How am I supposed to do that, Sir?” You gave him an incredulous look. 

Scoffing, he shook his head and looked at you with fiery eyes. “I don’t know. Suck me off, use your pretty little hands. I’m sure you can come up with something in that head of yours.” His tone hit a little harder than he had probably intended it to but you shook it off, he was just stressed. 

“Okay Sir.”  

You decided to go slowly, just to spite him. Using your hands to stroke his length until he was hard. Continuing to stroke him, you licked from the base to his tip, swirling your tongue around his head. Taking him into your mouth, you began to suck lightly, giving him just enough pressure to drive him mad. His eyes remained trained on the clock above the bed, watching the seconds tick down and becoming increasingly frustrated. When he tried to push your head onto his length and make you deep throat him you denied his wishes, instead continuing to suck his tip lightly. After a second attempt to push you onto his length was blocked, he growled and flipped you over, forcing you onto all fours with your ass in the air.  Without warning he slammed into you, slapping your ass and kneading your cheeks. He grunted into your ear, whispering words of anger. “You brat. Maybe this will teach you to behave. Bad girls don’t get rewards.” His hand wrapped around your throat, pressing down to constrict your air flow. 

As he continued to slam into you, you felt a painful burn begin to take over. You weren’t wet enough to take him yet and you couldn’t possibly continue like this. It felt as if you were being ripped in half, the pain becoming too much to bear. As good as you could with his hand pushing down on your throat, you choked out your safeword. “T-trea- treasure.” He stilled immediately, pulling out and helping you to turn onto your back. You choked and brought your fingers to your neck, feeling hot tears run down your face. 

“I’m so sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. I shouldn’t have taken out my anger on you. I’m sorry.” He looked beyond concerned, scared that he would do such a thing to you. Leaning forward, he wiped your tears away, and almost pulled you into his arms until he thought better of it. 

“San.” you gasped out, calling him by his real name for the first time. “You didn’t mean to. I’m okay.” 

“I shouldn’t have...“ He whispered, still staring at you wide-eyed. 

“Can I… can I stay?” You asked him, wanting to stay, hoping he would hold you after what had just happened. 

The question brought him back into reality and he shook his head. “No. Take as long as you need and I’ll have Mingi get ready to take you home.” 

He left you, walking out the door and leaving you naked on his bed. Tears fell from your eyes, your body shaking from sobs. You knew you weren’t supposed to fall for him, but here you were. Nothing could take away the pain of being rejected, the pain of being seen as just another meeting to be checked off his list. You had hoped that maybe he was beginning to feel the same way. But of course not, life hardly ever seemed to go in your favor.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Your next few meetings were awkward to say the least. He was more cautious with you, always making sure he wasn’t being too rough with you. He still put his all into the sex, getting himself off but making sure you still felt just as good. You wanted to admit your feelings to him but you were too scared of the inevitable rejection. He was a gang leader for fucks sake and you were the owner of a dinky little bakery. He was definitely out of your league and the power he held intimidated you to say the least.

The last week of the agreement came and you were told to come a little later than usual. After getting a ride from Mingi, you tentatively knocked on San’s door. Tonight was quite possibly the last night you would ever see him and preparing yourself for that reality was hard. 

“Come in.” You heard his familiar voice through the door. 

Pushing the door open softly, you saw him sitting on the bed. He looked tired and worn down with several bruises all over his body. Your heart panged at the sight. “Come here.” Motioning for you to come over, he sat up straighter against the headboard, grunting in pain.  Crawling across the bed, you sat in front of him and played with the hem of your shirt. “What happened to you sir?” Looking at him with concern in your eyes, you heard him chuckle lowly.

“Just a fight. Nothing to worry about baby girl.”  Reaching forward, he took your hand and gently pulled you towards him, forcing  you to straddle him. 

“We don’t have to do anything tonight if you don’t want to Sir.” Although you were looking forward to the sex, making sure he was comfortable was a bigger priority. 

“It’s okay baby. I want to.” Running his fingers up your arms, he spoke quietly, a stark contrast to his usually authoritative tone. “I want you to ride me.” 

Lifting his hips, he struggled to push his pants down his hips. “Let me help you, sir.” You helped him slide off his pants and boxers and quickly removed your clothes as well. Pulling off his shirt, you allowed your fingers to faintly trace the rises and dips of his muscles, stopping yourself so he wouldn’t reprimand you. Beginning to grind on him, you whimpered when he let out a long groan. When you told him were wet enough, he motioned for you to lift your hips and slide onto his length. You positioned yourself and slowly sunk down around him, crying out as his teeth sunk into your shoulder to muffle his moans like usual. Once you felt your body adjust, you began to move at the usual pace San set, feeling your legs tiring quickly. 

“Wait,” He motioned for you to slow down, his hands halting your hips. “Slowly. I want to feel you.” He held your hips tight and guided you to slowly rock on him. You could feel every ridge of his cock as he slid out slightly and pushed back in. This felt different. He had never wanted to take it slow before and you couldn’t help but wonder why tonight was different. Instead of fucking, this felt a lot more like making love and your heart swelled at the thought. 

As you continued to rock your hips, you felt him hit particularly deep and you both moaned in ecstasy. Throwing his head back, he choked out a breath. “Fuck- I love you.” 

Halting your movements, you looked him deep in the eyes. “Really?” 

“I do. So much.” Wrapping his arms around your body, he pulled your chest to his. His lips met yours in a passionate kiss, tenderly nipping at your lips.  Pulling back, he pushed a strand of hair behind your ear, taking in how beautiful you looked like this. His eyes were gentle and loving. “I should have told you sooner. I was too big of a fucking idiot to see how much you meant to me.” 

Bucking his hips into yours again, his tip grazed a spot that had you gasping for breath. “Oh Sir.” Threading your fingers in his hair, you ran your hands through his dark locks like you’ve always loved to do. “I love you too.” 

Continuing to buck his hips upwards, he helped guide your hips to better grind on his dick. His lips moved to your neck, pressing sweet kisses from your collarbones to your jaw. Wrapping his fingers around your breast, he gently tugged on your nipple, sucking in a breath when you whined. 

“I love the sounds you make.” His voice was ragged and labored, you could tell he was close. “Shit- your voice is like music to my ears. Say my name baby. Not ‘Sir.’ My real name baby.” 

“S-san.” You whimpered out, drunk on the way he whispered to you. 

“Fuck.” 

Bracing yourself on his chest, you moved your hips a little faster, feeling the familiar pressure building in your stomach.“No one else can take my cock like you do. No one else tastes as good as you do.” Moving your hips erratically, you moaned when he pressed his fingers to your clit, slowly rubbing circles into the nub. “Cum for me baby. Let me feel you cum on my cock.” With one last stroke of your hips and circle of his fingers, you felt yourself fall apart the same time he released his load deep within you. “I love you, I love you, I love-” He moaned out and you whimpered at his words, cutting him off by connecting your lips with his. You rode out your orgasms, stopping when the sensation became too much. Wiping the sweat from his forehead, he looked at you with eyes full of adoration. “Please stay.”  

All you ever wanted was to stay the night, for him to hold you and give you a sense of protection. “Of course, baby.” You smile down at him gently, whimpering when he lifted you off of his length.

Feeling your combined releases trickle down your legs, you watched as he ran his finger along your slit, moaning as he collected some of the weness. Bringing his finger to his mouth, he sucked it clean and hummed. “So sweet.” Cupping his face in your hands, you leaned forward to press a slow kiss to his lips, tasting yourself on his tongue and feeling his hands rest at your waist as he kissed you back. Allowing him to pull you down to the mattress with him, you broke away from his lips and helped him cover your bodies with the fine sheets. Tucking your head into his neck, he let you run your fingers through his hair, shutting his eyes at the comforting feeling. “Good night San.” You whispered, hearing him hum in response as he pulled you closer to him. Settling into his embrace, you felt him press one last kiss to your neck before you fell into a deep sleep.  

[copperbadge]

Hi. I love your blog! I’m in the middle of a second major depressive episode (my first was in my teens) and like you were, I’m unemployed and living with my parents. I’m now on medication and getting help and applying for jobs, but no luck so far. How did you ‘turn your life around’ and how long did it take you – going from depressed to starting a successful career in the non-profit world? Any advice on how I could do the same?

Oh, Anon. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this but in no way did I turn my life around, and I definitely didn’t build a career intentionally. 

A lot of the below is general advice -- you are already doing great! -- but I figure some people who are where you are but not quite as far along could be helped by it. Thanks for the opportunity :)

So, here’s the thing: depression is the kind of mental illness that can just be with you for the rest of your life even when it’s not impacting your life. Some depression is situational and therefore (theoretically) escapable, but some of us are just never going to forge enough serotonin on a regular enough schedule. So it’s not a matter of beating depression or backing away from it, but of learning good coping mechanisms: how to recognize an episode is coming, how to keep functioning in a depressive episode, when to ask for help. 

And unfortunately while I can tell you what works for me, this is going to vary by person. Some people feel sad all the time; some people feel numb; some people feel okay but are overly impacted by minor setbacks or frustrations, or can do normal life stuff but any deviation from routine sends them into a spiral. These are just examples; there are more. My methods of coping are stuff like building lists, making sure that those lists have stuff like “communicate with friends” on them, being on specific platforms that make that communication easy, and inasmuch as I can, avoiding drama and volatile emotions. Doing the bare minimum of housework to keep myself from being MORE depressed. Making sure my work gets done so that I keep my job, even if I feel like other parts of my life might be out of control. 

And as I’ve recently mentioned, I write fiction as a stress response. If I’m not writing but I’m doing okay -- keeping my house clean, feeling good, having fun -- that’s fine. Not optimal, I like writing, but it’s fine. If I’m writing, I’m probably a little stressed, but I’m managing it. If I’m not writing AND I’m not functioning well, or I know I’m unhappy, then I know that the depression is probably worse than I think it is, and I need to go into survival mode. 

Some people need meds -- taken year round, even when you’re not depressed. There’s no shame in that and if you aren’t currently using medication, I would recommend at least investigating its use to see if it could help. [ETA: Sorry I 100% missed the part where you are on medication, but this is still useful for others so I’m leaving it in.]

So like...”how long did it take me” is a tough question to answer because I’m still in it. I will be, all my life, and once I came to accept that, I could figure out ways to keep it from devastating me. How long it took me to establish good coping mechanisms? Well, I was diagnosed at 17, which is a rough age to be when it starts happening, but I managed to survive college (barely) and I feel like I had a pretty good handle on managing it by the time I was, I guess about 25. The point at which I was unemployed and living with my parents was the absolute low point of my life, when I was 23-24, but that was compounded by external factors. As soon as I got out of my parents’ house, things improved; as soon as I had a job, even a truly shitty one, I felt like life was survivable. (A huge coping mechanism in those days was actually Netflix, back when it was a mail-you-a-DVD service, because I knew at least a few times a week I would get mail addressed to me with a nice surprise in it.) 

And the thing about being here now is -- my parents gave me three grand to get out of the house, find a place of my own, and survive 2-3 months until I could find a job. I couldn’t have done any of what I’ve done without three solid thousand dollars, and even then I got lucky. I quit my first, super shitty job (the only time I have EVER quit a job) and got a job with my last place of work literally two week before the 2008 financial crisis hit. That job happened to be a very visible if very ground-floor administrative position, and from there I was able to impress people who wanted to hire me up to the next administrative level, and from there I was promoted into the department because I showed an active and visible interest in the work they did. That was intentional, but literally nothing before it was anything other than “I need a job and this one offers health insurance.”  

Once you have a job in which advancement is possible, which again is a matter somewhat of luck, advancing is just a matter of maintaining a good work-life balance while doing good work and showing you’re interested in supporting the mission of the company. Documenting the work you do, asking for raises, asking or applying for advancement -- putting yourself forward. That’s not so hard. But that’s kind of like starting on third base and telling someone you just need to run 90 feet. You’ve got to get to third base first and for me that was a lot of luck. 

But here’s the kicker: you can’t win the lottery unless you buy a ticket. So for you, right now, waiting on that opportunity, your job is to keep yourself alive and reasonably looked-after, gather all the energy you have, and start figuring out a game plan. Whether that’s a shitty job that you agree with yourself you’ll only do for a year, or asking your parents for a huge financial leap of faith if they’re able -- three grand was a LOT for my parents but they knew it was probably going to save my life -- or applying to better jobs that could push you up the ladder. And of course we’re in a pandemic so like, fuck the world, all of this is just that much harder. But people are being hired, and people are moving into apartments, and going to therapy, and doing their best. So there’s hope, as long as you start homebrewing it first. 

The thing that has helped me the most in the last twenty years, and which I think may be most helpful and simultaneously most frustrating to you, is that I never just said “I don’t like where I am or what I’m feeling”. I started there, absolutely, but then I asked, “What can I change to stop feeling this way?”

You have to rule out “nothing” as an answer. You probably will have to sit with the question for a while, maybe even a few weeks. You may need to google some weird shit to figure it out. And maybe what you do is a stupid stop-gap like buying yourself a $1 blind box toy once a week so you can feel surprise at something again. Maybe you admit that right now you need to pass the baton and you unfollow or blacklist political activism and activists and just fill your social media with people making dumb dad jokes and posting cat pictures. Maybe that gives your brain breathing room to find more permanent solutions.

But once you get in the habit of “how can I change this”, solutions do start to appear. 

So, yeah. Truth is I worked super hard but I also got super lucky. But part of being lucky was being there when the luck finally hit. So I’m wishing you, wholeheartedly, the best of luck. 

(Also if your parents have money and aren’t assholes I can’t recommend “Make them give you a long-term loan to get on your feet” strongly enough.)

[httpteddybear]

Cherry | Harry Styles

SUMMARY; After Harry gets his heart broken once again, he swears off love, until Y/n and her dog bring him a delicious gift and their friendship along with it.

WARNING(S); Cursing, disgustingly adorable fluff, a v cute cameo from my real dog Peachy!! (send her some kisses), slow burn, angst if you squint

WORD COUNT; 7.8k

AUTHORS NOTE; Hey, this is for @tiostyles Fine Line challenge, give her a follow! Also, this is my first time publishing my writing so I’m so so sorry if it’s terrible. Forgive me if it's written badly. I wrote this on Tumblr so sorry if it looks funny or anything. Also pls give all the love to my dog peachy she loves attention. (thanks to @lostincalum​ @h0tsos​ for reading a bit of this) Happy Reading!!

“I don’t know what to say to you except I’m sorry.”

Harry was everything but okay. He’d just found out that the girl he had pined over for months obviously didn’t feel the same. Now Harry was a smart man. He knew the ins and outs of his career and who he should and shouldn’t let into his life, which is why he was so baffled that he’d chosen the wrong person to let into his heart. She’d met Gemma and Anne, even a few of his cousins, and they’d all loved her. It was quite heart wrenching because even though she’d just told him the number one thing that would end a relationship, he still loved her.

“J-Just don’t call him baby, okay?”

—

It’d been almost two months since he’d seen Camille and his life wasn’t really alright. He wasn’t fully over her, she was incorporated into his daily life. His clothes, his thoughts, his eating habits, his favourite tv shows, everything. Somehow everyone found out within a matter of days what had happened, so he got an earful from Jeff. Then he got the sympathy from his family.

The only thing worse than both of those was the pity. When he went to get coffee the barista said she “hoped he was okay.” While giving him his coffee, and then Harry had seen a group of fans and the first thing that was said to him was “you poor baby.” That had set him off. Because even though it was tough, he was not a baby. He could do his own laundry and make his own food. He was not dependent on Camille for any of that, it was just nice to have someone by his side in a non-platonic way. Don’t get him wrong, he still put on a smile as they belittled him a bit. It was what he did.

So currently Harry was sitting on his couch, watching Disney movies. He felt more comfortable in his London home than the one in L.A. so he gathered his essentials and hopped on a plane. He was in a big knit sweater and some sweats. He felt content as ever. He had sort of swore off love when the Camille situation happened, so this feeling of contentment was nice. Inside his home he didn’t really have to worry about prying eyes or people judging him, so wrapped in large clothes looking very small was okay. It was okay outside of home too, but he always had a knack for looking somewhat presentable. He liked to be pretty. As did everyone but it made Harry feel like he was on top of the world. If he had the courage to wear a dress he damn sure would.

As Harry was finishing up he’d decided it was time for a cat nap. So that’s what he did. He didn’t bother to take off his clothes, just lazily pulling himself up the stairs and into his room before crashing down on his bed, pulling the duvet over his feet and up to his neck before rolling to his right side. He’d always been a side sleeper. From what his mom said, at least.

—

“Peachy! Who’s my good girl? Who’s my best girl?”

Somehow peach had found the other shoe Y/n was looking for, and that warranted some love. Y/n smiled as the Samoyed licked her happily. They were about to go on a walk to explore the new neighborhood. Y/n had judged moved into an adorable two-bedroom, one-bath, yellow house. Y/n was the epitome of someone you’d find living in that type of house. With her vanilla perfume, big fluffy Samoyed dog, and overall happy personality, the homeowner thought she was the perfect candidate to rent to.

Going on her way, Y/n decided she’d take a walk somewhere she hasn’t driven through, her best option was essentially a rich community, but she didn’t care. Her dirty shoes hit the pavement alongside Peach, watching as her dog sniffed everything in sight. Turning the corner, she found the cutest little bakery, and her excitement showed. Walking up to the brick building, she’d immediately seen the sign in bold. “NO DOGS.” Frowning, Y/n looked around. She started to walk to the pole she was going to tie peach too, but then she heard squeals.

“Mommy! Doggie!”

It didn’t bother her, so she rerouted.

“Hi miss, is it okay if my dog loves on your little munchkin? She’s very sweet and I’ve heard your child’s excitement.”

The mother smiled at how kind the girl was before nodding. Y/n brought peach over, and she was overjoyed to see the tiny child immediately clutching on.

After a few moments of her chatting with the mother, her stomach decided to make itself know. So she politely excused herself cursing at her stomach for ruining an adorable moment. Tying peach to the grey pole, she trotted inside the bakery. It was mostly empty minus the couple sharing a moment by the window and the assumed college student typing away.

“Hi, welcome to Wall Street Bakery! What can I get you?”

Y/n had to scan over the menu, they had everything from cackle to scones, so it was a difficult choice. But she’d finally agreed on a cup of whipped cream, for peach, and a half a dozen cupcakes. She didn’t know what she’d do with the extra, but she’d figure it out. Pulling nineteen pounds from her purse, she told the girl to keep the change, and she was on her way.

Peach had, as expected, ate all the whipped cream from the medium size cup. Y/n had a single cupcake before she was stuffed, in her defense, she had four slices of pizza, so this was just a tiny snack for her. She didn’t know why she ordered six, but she knew she’d find something to do with the remaining. She and peach started to walk again, taking all kinds of turns and twists, but not enough to lose their tracking. Suddenly Y/n came to a beautiful White House. It looked elegant, so she stopped to admire.

In her mind it wasn’t really creepy, she was just admiring the luxury. The more she looked the clearer everything became. Including the figure in the window of the second story. He sat idle, maybe reading or listening to music, she couldn’t quite tell. He looked dainty, fragile even. So Y/n knew where the five cupcakes would go. She swiftly pulled out a sticky note and a pen and got to work.

‘Hopefully, this sweetens up your day!’

-Y/n :)

—

Harry was listening to music. Mainly Stevie Nicks if we’re honest. He’d decided that today was going to be a relaxing day, which means that going to the studio was out of the agenda. Jeff was okay with it, stating that he had to have a meeting with someone else anyway. So Harry had a fully free relax day. So social media, television, and laziness were his full schedule. Harry had almost gotten caught up with his timeline then his stomach rumbled. He got up, going downstairs. He walked through the living room, still hearing Disney Channel from the tv. Finally getting to the kitchen, he started looking.

Now, after countless walk between the cabinets and the fridge, Harry just gave up. He decided to be a tiny bit productive by getting the mail. Harry slipped his feet in the weirdly angled slippers by the door and walked outside. Harry looked like a proper dad right now, clad in pajama sweat pants, a robe with no shirt under, and fuzzy slippers. As soon as he got outside he saw a pastel pink box with a yellow sticky note on it. Harry wasn’t crazy, but maybe this was something from Camille. Maybe a box of his favourite red velvet cupcakes that her mom made, or maybe a truce. He tried not to get his hopes up. He also wasn’t stupid. So there was no way he was opening that box inside. Just in case.

So, carefully, he grabbed the sticky note from on top of the box. His eyes scanned the letters as a small smile came to his face. Whoever this was, seemed nice and trustworthy, from what he could gather from the tiny paper. So he opened the box, just having to take the small piece of tape that was on the box. Inside we’re a mix of vanilla and chocolate cupcakes, and while it wasn’t red velvet, they looked pretty promising. Again, Harry didn’t know this stranger, and he was a bit of a skeptic when it came to random gifts on his doorstep. But for an unknown reason, he felt inclined to just trust his gut. He was getting far too hangry to worry about death.

He picked up a chocolate cupcake and bit off about half in one bite. Trust and believe that he moaned at the taste. When you deprive yourself of sweets for a healthy diet, a bite into any kind of sweet felt like you were on acid in cake land. So Harry forgot all about the mail and swiftly took the box inside, kicking the door closed with his foot. Now he was almost one hundred percent sure that his whole day would be filled with the sweet-savory taste of these cupcakes.

Harry was very grateful for y/n the cupcake giver, whoever they may be.

-

Y/n felt like she was doing well in life, not astronomically good, but well. She didn’t have any major issues, she was generally acceptable by society. Well, her generation society, cause, of course, some piercing, tattoos, weight, and anything seemly not normal to grandmas around the world was a sin. She got okay grades in school and had a nice job. She had enough money for a tiny yellow house, a dog, and of course herself, so in her mind, she was doing more than good. but for some reason, not having a significant other was the biggest problem for anyone who found out. Y/n had boyfriends, girlfriends, flings, she dabbled in just about anything she felt, but for the past three years, getting her and her pet a life was the most important thing at the time. Now, y/n wasn’t opposed to having someone around. Maybe the cute girl at the coffee shop, her curly hair, dark skin contrasting against striking blue eyes, and pearly white smile was enough to give y/n butterflies as she finished her scone that day. Or the cute boy in the window, there was just something about him. Y/n liked him enough to give him five beautiful delicious cupcakes, so that should say something.

Pop culture was something that y/n was very interested in. Every now and then she’d find herself drooling over Calum Hood on her feed or staring at a paused shot of Zendaya in Euphoria for twenty-three minutes. She loved seeing people grow and she could even say that she was a fan. In fact, if you showed her the music video for Best Song Ever, she’d probably burst in your face with “Niall, do the shimmy, do the shimmy, do the shimmy, and Zayn pirouette and Louis do the splits, and Liam you stay exactly where you are because you are PERFECT,”

Y/n loved things like that, it was amazing to see people get credit when they deserve it. Sure she was heartbroken when My Chemical Romance broke up, maybe she cried for two hours when One Direction broke up, but she got over it. She could proudly listen to Welcome to the Black Parade without crying and she even kept up with Niall and Harry, not like she used to, but she tried to like a picture every now and then. Y/n was a go with the flow kind of girl, she moved on from things quickly and saw the good in things. which is why she was very confused seeing #camillerowecancelled all over her timeline. it was hard to not click on it, but y/n was having a good day and she did not need to indulge in things like that, she left that behind when she deleted Wattpad in 2014.

“Ma’am?”

Y/n nearly forgot that she was at a pet store, social media does that.

“Oh! Yes, hi. I was just looking to see if you guys had any Huskies or Pitbulls?”

Y/n was on a mission to get Peach a friend. She felt bad that the 6-month-old puppy had to be all alone while she was at work, so the only option was getting another dog to keep her company. Peach got on well with just about every dog, so it wasn’t a life-changing decision, she just had to find a dog that Peachy would get on well with. 

The worker showed her and Peach to the dog area and just left, for that she was thankful. She had always talked to Peach and she intended to ask her about the dogs she got excited about but she was sure the worker would’ve thought she was crazy. So she walked around a bit, looking at dogs and talking to Peach. Then, she nearly dropped her phone. She ran to the glass swiftly, looking at the tiny pup. It was a Husky-Chow Chow mix, and she knew she already loved her, she had no name yet either. Peach saw y/n get excited and started wagging her tail. soon enough, a puppy was on in front of her and peach couldn’t be happier to see the mini bear-like dog.

“She’s only about eight weeks old, and a lot of work, are you sure?”

Y/n couldn’t believe the audacity of the question. Of course, she wanted a tiny bear scampering around, going on adventures with her and peach. So she signed about thirty papers as quick as she could. She came to the name paper and the question hung in the air. What did she want to name the tiny bear? With Peach, she got a few days to be creative, and the samoyed was just peachy, so she named her Peach. Y/n searched her brain for names until she couldn’t think anymore. Then she squealed. She does that a lot.

Now, Y/n was on her way home, little Pipkin in her lap,  peach sat in the passenger seat as she jammed out to Lana Del Rey. Pip seemed to be having the time of her life, happy to be out of the confined cage. Y/n was, as you’d say, living her best life. She really didn’t have a care in the world. No one could really blame her. Y/n was pretty sure she just scored the cutest dog in all of London.

“Summertime and the living’s easy!”:

Y/n made it home in record time, she's pretty sure she was speeding, but Peach seemed very excited so she wanted them to be able to interact. She put Pip’s tiny leash and harness on, which was proved to be useless. Pip just kept tangling herself in Y/n’s legs and nearly got trampled by Peach. So, Pip got off scot-free just being carried. Peach was sniffing the tiny animal as soon as Y/n stepped in the door.

“Peachy, hold on I promise I’ll put her down in a sec.”

After getting settled, Y/n carefully set Pipkin on the ground, going to the couch to watch the two dogs interact. Peach sniffed Pipkin and vice versa, both faces have been in the butt of the other in addition to their own. They ran around the house for a bit, then the yard. They ate together for the first time, Peach even tried to share her food. They got on well, just like Y/n had predicted, so she decided it was time for a group walk. Y/n put a pastel hoodie over her tiny black camisole crop-top and exchanged her slides for converse, then they were out the door.

Pip seemed to walk better with Peach as Y/n helped guide. She went the same way as yesterday, finding she liked the scenic route even if it was longer. She walked passed the coffee shop, even smiling at the cute curly-haired girl. She passed the bakery this time, she wasn’t feeling sweets today. She walked quite a bit, even taking a few selfies of all three of them. Y/n was excited. She and Peach had a new companion. It might also be the rush of the fact that she's pretty sure the cute window boy is out in his lawn. She tried to keep cool, even almost went to the other side of the street but peach wasn’t gonna let that happen. It seems already Pip has become a rebel because she stayed with Peach. Y/n trained them, but they weren’t like Army dogs, so she let them practically pull her until two houses before his. She fixed herself up a bit, checking that her posture didn’t resemble the hunchback of Notre Dame. 

She got closer and she could already feel the butterflies swirling in her tummy. Peach and Pip must’ve felt it too, because closer they got, the closer to Y/n the dogs got. Especially Pip, but I’m sure its just cause she’s very tiny compared to the man, his hand could probably fit Pip in its palm. Y/n contemplated talking to him, which she did until she was nearly up in his face. When she saw him clearly, oh boy. Butterflies were an understatement. it was like a swarm of fuzzy bumblebees was tickling every part of her tummy. Y/n can definitely confirm that curly hair and bright eyes were essentially her type as of now.

“The boy from the window!”

If Y/n wanted to die before it was nothing compared to now. she literally wanted London to swallow her and her dogs until they were in the middle of nowhere with no proof of their existence. Pip and Peach weren’t bothered, sitting idle in the sun. The gate blocked out a bit of Y/n’s beet-red face, not as much as she would have wished.

-

Harry had decided to go outside. It was a pretty nice day for London, the sun was even out. So after copious amounts of sunscreen, some more presentable clothing, just in case of a fan, and some slides, he was on his way to his larger than the normal front yard. He planned on being out for a bit, so he brought snacks and drinks too. His mother taught him the habit. She always had some sort of snack in her purse and she almost always had those mini water bottles.

He lived in a pretty secluded part of London, but he still wanted to be prepared if a fan came up to him. Harry didn’t want to sound like an ass but more often than not, he didn’t want to take pictures. He was all for living in the moment. After always having a camera on you for about six years, you’d get sick of it too. It's not that he didn’t like meeting fans, he loved it. They made him who he was, but almost every one of them wanted a picture to document that they met him. It's albeit sad, the fact that if you just said that you met him, everyone would ask for proof. Trust does get a bit tainted from fame. 

Harry was almost ready to go inside, he was near sunburnt, and if he didn't get inside his mom would scold him. Now some people might think that he's an adult and that he doesn't need to listen to her. Harry thinks different. His mom is such a kind soul but if you make her mad enough to scold you, oh she’ll scold you. Harry didn't like the feel of the cold aloe vera either. He’d kept it in the fridge, it was mean to cool you down and soothe you, but that's maybe a five minute cool. His had been in the fridge for about two months. Then, he saw a fluffy cloud walking alongside a very tiny bear, so he stayed. Even to just get a closer glance at the dogs.

Now imagine this, you’re on your lawn, waiting for two dogs to pass by, but they stop at your gate. You’re curious and, in this case, you think it might be a fan. what would be the face you made if the first thing that person said was,

“The boy from the window!”

It took him a minute to even process the words the girl just spoke, he was on autopilot walking to his gate and unlocking it. He went up to the girl, she looked sweet, she was very pretty and looked like she could model but also like she had just run three miles, her face was very red. Harry didn’t mention it. Instead, he said,

“Pardon?”

He couldn’t tell who was redder. that was an idiot thing to say, he could see it now if this angel really was famous, the headlines would probably be at his neck, making jokes about how he had shit pickup lines, but he did. That probably warranted cheating in his mind.

-

Y/n couldn’t believe she was about to explain that she was being a creep but she didn’t know what else to say, she couldn’t just let the silence sit but holy shit, she was talking to Harry Styles. Her stomach said barf on his feet but her mind said to play it cool, she chooses the latter.

“I, uh, yesterday, I saw you sat in the window, and you looked a bit sad, at least from where I was standing, so I left five cupcakes at your doorstep. I’m Y/n.”

Y/n saw his face shift, but his eyes showed immediate confusion. 

“How’d you get through the gate?”

Way to go y/n, you trespassed. You finally meet a boy, well, see a boy, and you fuck it up by trespassing? yay.

“I- It was actually open a bit and you looked sad. Listen, I'm sorry but please don't send me to jail. Pip and Peachy need me to feed them and I need my tiny house I beg you just like punch me instead I sw-”

Y/n couldn’t help herself. From her perspective she made a damn good case, cause no one could take the person who has two dogs to jail, Well, they could, but morally? yeah right bitch.

“Hey, don’t worry, yeah? just let me pet your dogs and we’ll call a truce.”

Y/n didn’t think this could get any better. She met Harry Styles, and he likes her dogs. Not gonna lie, Y/n thought he was a cat person, sure he could be a ray of sunshine, but he had major resting ‘step a centimeter too close to me and I’ll kill you’ face. Her need to scream right now was a ten on a scale of one to nine. Sure she kept her composure and would until she got comfortable, but if she was alone, she’d break a glass. One Direction among, various other artists, shaped her taste in music all through high school. She listened to No Control pretty much every day of freshman year, it was on her morning playlist.

Y/n zoned out, caught up in her thoughts, but when she did come back from the wave of nostalgia, she saw possibly a once in a lifetime moment. Her dogs, snuggled up into harry, as he sat there in all his handsome glory.

“I completely forgot to introduce m’self. I’m Harry.”

he held a kind smile, it didn’t fully reach his eyes, but it was genuine.

“I know who you are, congratulations on the new song, by the way.”

He didn’t miss a beat before asking,

“Would you like a picture?”

Y/n honestly didn’t know what to do. Would saying no be too rude? ‘Cause she did not have the energy to pull out her phone. 

“Oh, no thanks, actually.”

He seemed, almost relived? It was confusing. Y/n didn’t meet celebrities on the regular, but she was almost one hundred percent sure that he would have thought she was rude. 

After talking and letting Harry pet her dogs a bit more, she, unfortunately, had to go. She let him know, they exchanged hugs, and she said a sorrowful goodbye to Harry. It was weird, sometimes she forgot that people she looked up too were just like her at some point. maybe playing with a Tamagotchi or beating one of their friends at BopIt. It truly was a ‘rags to riches’ story for so many famous people.

Y/n finally got home, after taking a few pit stops, letting Peach and Pip do what they needed to do. She was relieved to see her tiny yellow house, it held a lot of character for one, Y/n even went as far as naming it Lanana. It was a dumb combination of lemon and banana, re; her house colour. Second, her feet were pretty much throbbing. Pip was acting like she was dying from walking and Peach immediately lied on the floor. Y/n also found the rug to be pretty comfortable as she lied on it, staring at her surroundings.

Her cacti seemed to be doing well, probably cause it was fake. It seemed fairly clean, so she didn’t have to worry about that tomorrow. her tapestry of corgis seemed to have come down on one side, but other than that her walls looked genuinely okay, she has yet to put a hole in them. and her books on the coffee table were still unmoved. Y/n didn’t really read them, but who has books on their coffee table that they actually read? The ceiling was pretty bland though, maybe she’d buy something to put on it. 

Y/n rolled over and pulled out her phone. her eyes were probably going to hurt later. Whenever she started scrolling, it didn’t matter which app, she had trouble stopping. But she’d get up eventually, if not, Peach would probably maul her if she didn’t get her peanut butter covered meds. Y/n debated going on twitter, but she didn't really want to see anything on there, opting for Instagram, she got into a comfortable position and started scrolling.

-

Harry was very, very frustrated. He had gotten a sunburn and that scold from his mom. Anne went on for about fifteen minutes about how he’d get skin cancer and how he’ll feel like leather by the time he’s fifty. She had good intentions, but Harry had thin patients. He did keep it under wraps, he had too. It’d be a whole other scolding if he got snappy with his mum. He actually talked to her for ten minutes, more or less, about what was going on in his life and etcetera before his mum called it a night.

He kept thinking about you, well you and your dogs. Sure human interaction was appealing, puppy interaction was essential. Had you been anyone else, excluding his mum and a few friends, Harry would have called security. He just chose to trust his gut and the dogs that you were with.

It was a rare feeling that harry got around dogs. Not like the love you give your significant other, it was less intimate. More like the love you give a child or someone you love very much. Harry almost considered getting a dog. Big or small the creatures were loyal, always waiting for you to get home and following you through the house. They were very reliable and dependant on their owners. Harry thought that was something he needed. Someone to depend on him, keep him grounded and let him know he was wanted. He had wanted a dog up until he realized that he was too busy. He was always busy now. Getting ready to release a new album, having to give his all for it to be what he imagined. He barely had time to himself, a pet would be too much to handle.

Had Harry realized a singing career would jeopardize his opportunity to get a dog, he would have never auditioned in the first place. Harry always had a love for animals. Now, when you hear that you take into account people's fears, with Harry, you didn’t have to. By the age of three, he was trotting up to garden snakes, helping to untangle them from whatever twig they were stuck in. He helped spiders outside and whatever you can think of that someone would fear, he’d do it. Not because he was brave, because if you told him to try and run over a tiny stream in-between the grass, he wouldn’t hesitate to tell you no and throw a fit. Harry was just gentle, in a lot of aspects. 

He was gentle when he broke up with people, he was gentle when his bunny was getting ready to pass away, he was gentle when his sister was stressed looking for colleges, he was just gentle. which came with a lot of selflessness. Everything was Harry’s fault, in the sense that he blamed himself for a lot of things. He still blamed himself for Camille. Her falling out of love wasn’t his fault, she made that clear, but he couldn’t help but nitpick his flaws. The was he sometimes zoned out while she talked, or when he had a meeting but she had an off day, he felt terrible leaving Camille alone.  Harry was off.

He wasn’t broken, he felt okay, there was no metaphorical hole in his heart. Harry was fine. Except for when he wasn’t. The nights of alcohol and screaming led to nothingness. No more screaming, no more soft cuddles in the early hours. Harry was indifferent about it.  On the one hand, he was glad. He had calm peaceful nights and his liquor cabinet was almost always full again. On the other hand, his bed felt awfully empty. He still slept on his side, it felt like she was still lingering. Even with the million times, he washed the sheets, she still felt like she was right there.

Harry hoped he’d get over her.

-

Y/n was running detrimentally late. She’d gotten the best job interview and guess what? She got up an hour too late. By the eighth time she snoozed, she realized she had to be up. So she did some shitty ‘natural’ makeup, threw on a blazer, a cami under it, and the matching pants. She still looked bomb, Y/n would never doubt that. Especially when her confidence needed to be high. So now that Y/n was pulling up to get coffee, she’d regretted getting up so late.

The drive-thru was packed, everyone getting their own coffee. Y/n opted to go inside, coffee was like her push to get through the day and a Trenta should be enough to keep her somewhat lively. She still had to wait in a line inside, but this one was shorter. She tapped her thigh and scrolled through Instagram until she was at the counter. The barista was cute, having cool dyed hair was something Y/n gravitated towards, she could never get her hair a crazy colour, having to work serious jobs all the time. She always had to stick to somewhat natural. She’d rebelled at some point in middle school with bright, neon red hair. Then she’d stuck to natural colours, neon didn't look that good on her.

–

She picked up her coffee, taking a sip before starting her journey to her car. Well, she was, then the universe decided she needed a cute cliche.

“Oh! shit, I’m so sorry, I wasn’t even looking an-”

–

“and I just bumped into you, I’m sorry oh god.”

Harry recognized Y/n, and he wanted to say hi. Apparently, his version of hi was coffee spilled all over her shirt. He didn’t mean to, but the profuse apologizing was kind of cute.

“It’s fine love, saw you ‘nd thought I’d say hello.”

Harry caught Y/n blush at that. Albeit she got flustered over the tiniest things. She was quite cute now that Harry wasn’t distracted by dogs. She had a very nice style, besides the fact that there was now a stain on her camisole. She nearly matched the cafe chairs with her pants and blazer. It was cute.

She was cute.

–

To say Y/n was shocked was an understatement. For once a cute guy wanted to talk to her and she didn’t have to pine over him for months first. It was nearly a miracle. Y/n was a nice girl but confidence wasn’t always her strong suit. She couldn’t just talk to people, no no, she usually had to make an idiot of herself first. With the looming failure over her head and her heart racing, it made it very hard for Y/n to make new friends.

“Oh, for sure, uh I’m in a bit of a sticky situation.”

He held a finger up, signaling her to wait. He was discouraged she’d think he was weird and leave. But after coming back outside, a hand full of towelettes, he saw she was still there. Y/n took the damp fabric, wiping her blazer a bit, the only place the stain was visible was her blazer. Thank god for her camisole being black otherwise Harry would be able to tell she wasn’t wearing a bra. Sure she likes attention but not wearing a bra was solely hatred. Primarily Y/n had underwire bras, they were like hell around your boobs. So she opted out, it wasn’t like she expected to see Harry. He’d probably already noticed, it’d gotten considerably cold. He hadn’t said anything though, so there wasn’t much to dwell on.

Y/n patted herself down, thankfully getting most of the coffee stench out of her clothing. She’d forgotten all about why she was wearing a blazer or her interview. Y/n had her priorities all off, of course, Harry was more important than her interview, logically no, but Y/n wasn’t thinking with her head. Who would?

Harry was trying to decide whether or not he should ask for her number, was it too soon? What if he looked too desperate? The press would eat that up, he could already hear a tacky headline being typed. Y/n didn’t look like the type of girl that would care about that type of stuff. Desperate was surely socially constructed. Harry was obviously in too deep, who cared about any of that? he was gonna go for it.

Y/n was starting to see a difference in her blazer as the stain dried. Harry seemed spaced out, literally. He looked like he was on Mars. Harry looked like he was gonna say something, as he looked Y/n in the eyes for the first time.

She was gorgeous. Sure he’d dated models and beautiful women, but this was like home-brewed, authentic beauty. Her hair looked so soft, it was the type of hair that matched a lions mane, one he could imagine all over the pillow next to him. He liked Y/n, she was cute. After seeing her a few times Harry was almost drawn to her. She had an expensive personality. Not the kind of snobby, rich expensive, but rich with delicacies. She was kind to strangers she spoke to, and her dogs fit right with her, almost giving her a throne of cute, fluffy, kindness. The music in the coffee shop was heard outside, Harry swayed his body a bit to the beat.

“So, since we’ve run into each other a few times, I guess the universe thinks we’re soulmates.”

Harry didn’t need to rip off the bandaid, Y/n had just done it for him. Her smooth words flowed to him like silk, sure maybe Harry was getting a bit stalkerish, but it was all with good intention. If Y/n could be confident enough to say that and smile on, surely getting her number shouldn’t be that hard.

“So, ehm, I was wondering if I could ‘ve your number?”

Y/n was properly freaking out. Who wouldn’t? Harry looked at her with the most adorable gleaming eyes and just how could Y/n ever say no to that? He was her type but elevated. He had the bad boy vibe, but a heart of gold. Y/n liked to think of him as a milk dud oddly. But he and the mild dud alike had a hard, chocolate exterior, but sweet, chewy, caramel insides. He was ethereal. 

“Yes, yeah absolutely.”

-

It was now about a month after that. Harry and Y/n were going strong in the friend zone. Every time Harry asked Y/n out she was busy and vice-versa. Somehow the universe had gotten them together, but now it was like it vanished. All the work was now in their hands. It wasn’t as if having a date with one another was work, it wasn’t. Frankly, they really did enjoy each other's company, even through texts. But it was their literal work. 

Y/n couldn’t get a day off to save her life. Her boss was a bit of a dick. On top of it, most days off were spent graciously on the couch, feet propped up, and two dogs cuddling into her, all three intrigued by SpongeBob and Squidward arguing. Harry was in the middle of finishing up his album, so most of his time was spent at the studio. His days off were spent in L.A. It was rare that he was in London, sometimes he had to beg for a break. Thankfully he had jeff who sort of understood. So sure breaks were rare, but Harry spent so much time trying to work his hardest that he was keeping himself from it at this point. 

Harry had done enough waiting. Y/n seemed right up his alley. Her personality wasn’t too overbearing or too happy, she was a perfect state of nirvana. A calming aura came where ever she went and Harry could almost feel it through his screen. He and Y/n texted about anything. It could be a meme she sent him at three am, in turn, he’d laugh but tell her to get to bed. Or he’d send her minuscule things, like the stuff he sees in his everyday life that reminds him of her. Was Harry fully over his ex? No, but he’d get there. For you, Harry would at least try. Everyone had understood he was hurt but Anne pushed him to be happy for him, so that's what he was doing.

He’d texted Y/n about setting up a little get together, he didn’t want to call it a date, thinking maybe he’d scare her off. Y/n was persistent though, responding with ‘So it’s a date.’ It wasn't even a question, she’d just said it out in the open in hopes that Harry would be okay with it. He was. If Y/n could’ve seen his face when he read it she’d probably get a good laugh because as soon as he processed the text his lips curled up, bringing his mouth into a toothy smile. It felt nice to have someone paying attention to him again. He’d seen a few fans on his drive, waving as one cried, she immediately apologizing for being an ugly crier. There was something about finally getting a date and talking to the fans that put him in a fantastic mood. 

He was currently sitting in traffic, just coming back from seeing his mum. The surroundings were a bit bleak, all the houses were either White, Gray, or Black. Harry loved colour. He loved being able to express himself with pleasing ones that coordinate. Sure when he was little he’d throw on a raincoat but put shorts on, but having a stylist most of his life helped. His style was like a grandpa in a twenty-year-old’s body. Not that he cared, but it was a bit of an improvement from young British bloke who thinks he’s cool. Traffic started moving and Harry took his foot off the break, shifting gears to get moving. What was he doing? Well he, was on his way to get a particular bubbly nirvana girl. He and Y/n had planned the date about a week ago and agreed that they’d do something as soon as he got home. She insisted that he went home and relaxed, but Harry was stubborn, assuring her that he’d be fine. 

They had yet to plan where they were going, Y/n had talked about just going out and figuring it out when they ‘cross that lightbulb’ and he agreed. He neared the street that Y/n had given him and his mind was getting the best of him. Not every girl was the same but what if? There was always a possibility that it could happen again. Was his heart ready to risk it? Not fully, but one date couldn’t damage him that much. Harry always had a strong heart. When someone pushed him off the slide in primary school he’d said he fell. In Secondary school when his crush Rachel traded him for someone older, he’d let it go. He was strong and he could handle this. Y/n didn’t seem like she was like that.

He pulled up outside of her house, smiling at the bright colour. It was very her. Her windows were bright and open, he could see a small succulent on the ledge inside. She had a well-kept yard and the grass was as vibrant as ever. Considering it was London it could be hard to maintain a yard or even a garden, the weather was always temperamental. He heard the door open, watching as she stepped out from behind the white door. She looked beautiful, clad in some spandex shorts that fit her bottom nicely and a big sweater. It looked like a merch sweater of some sort. 

Y/n had a cute little bounce in her step, her hair bouncing a bit too. She and Harry had been on the best terms. They texted almost every day following him getting her number. She got to know him a bit better. She paid attention to a lot, she was an observer. The way he typed and formed sentences was very pleasing to the eye, at least he didn’t have terrible grammar. She reached the car, giving him a smile as she got in the car.

“How are y’love? Hair looks nice.”

Y/n smiled, attention to detail was always nice. They had also joked multiple times about her secretly being a lion cause she’d sent him a selfie after a particularly long day at work the day before. You could see the tangles and how frizzed it was. Harry thought it was adorable.

“Thanks, I’m good, at least it's brushed this time, right?”

He laughed. It was a nice sound.

“Any thought to where you’d like to go?”

Y/n hummed, thinking a bit.

“I was thinking ice cream, it’s rare that London has had this many sunny days, I’m wondering if we should be scared.”

They both laughed, agreeing on ice cream.

“Y’want the aux?” Harry offered.

“Yeah, thanks.”

Y/n hooked up her phone, going to Spotify and smiling as Hey Jude played through the speakers. She and Harry sang along ridiculously off-key and talked the entire drive to the tiny ice cream shop. Harry stopped the car and got out. So far, Y/n wasn’t bad. In fact, she was great. Her happiness radiated through the car, he bets it's hard to be in a bad mood around her. She’d opted for no makeup and Harry liked that. He loved girls with and without makeup but it was a gesture he appreciated, even if it wasn’t for him. 

Y/n looked up at the options, she didn’t particularly care for a lot of it, she didn’t want to eat something that had too much sweetness, she’d get a tummy ache. Harry had ordered Moose Track ice cream while Y/n ordered Ben and Jerry’s Strawberry Cheesecake. This was typically her go to unless she was sad, then she buried her sorrows in Cherry Garcia.

They didn't even sit down before they were chatting. Conversation flowed easily between them. They could go from talking about their day to talking about childhood. It was nice, there was no pressure to come up with a topic. If there was silence as they at it was comfortable, the ice cream shop wasn’t very full, it is on the outskirts of London, so they didn't have to worry about paparazzi. They talked about their favourite bands, people they looked up to, fashion choices, just about everything that came to mind. It was nice, Harry and Y/n singing to their heart's content to the Queen flowing through the shop, Y/n even getting up and using her spoon as a mic. Harry hadn’t felt this nice in a while.

“Then he turned and there was a garden snake and I’ve never heard a fifty-year-old man scream at a higher pitch than him.”

Y/n finished off her story, she and Harry had been laughing their asses off for about an hour, they’d been there for about two. 

“This is nice, love hanging out with you.”

Harry’s words held sentiment that made Y/n’s heart burst. 

“Same.”

Y/n replied, laughing as he made faces at her. This was easy. No pressure, nothing was forced, it was genuine first date bliss.

“Oops.”

Harry smirked as he took his spoon, putting a bit of chocolate on her nose,

“Harry.”

Y/n whined dragging out his name. He laughed, leaning forward. He kissed the ice cream off her nose watching as her cheeks tinted pink, it was adorable.

“You asked for it.”

next thing Harry knew there was ice cream on his nose now too, except she didn’t kiss it away, opting to take her finger and wipe it. bringing the finger to her mouth she laughed, making a face resembling the grinch as she licked her thumb. They didn’t want to leave, Harry would pay to have time freeze and keep this moment present forever. Sadly he couldn’t. They got up, going to the register.

“I’m paying.”

Y/n stated, dismissing Harry’s protests. 

Harry had dropped Y/n off, and there was no doubt he wanted to keep her around. He had his doubts but the small time that they had in the ice cream shop was phenomenal. Was Harry fully over his ex? No. But that was okay. He didn’t have to rush, he’d be just fine getting over her with Y/n’s help. He didn’t need a therapist or a new girlfriend, he needed someone to show him that he could have better. Y/n was better. As long as you two kept talking Harry was sure he’d be over it in no time.

y/n; so plans for our next date? ;)

[americasmarauders]

the last great american dynasty--Bucky Barnes

summary: A short story on how she lived her life after her sweetheart was kiiled during the war.

words: 1,934

author’s note: it’s been a while since i last worked on this and i think it’s a bit choppy, but i hope y’all like it. it’s slightly inspired by taylor siwft’s song the last great american dynasty. 

-

-

She didn't expect to meet him. The usual parties her father threw were filled to the brim with spoiled brats and entitled jerks. But he wasn't one of them. 

              He wore a crisp blue suit, his hair gelled back and his eyes bright like the sun. His smile was infectious and she found herself smiling from across the room just seeing the sight. He made his way towards her and she didn’t imagine how much her world would change.

              Bucky, that's what his name was, had not come to one of those gatherings before. It was usually his father that came. But his father was out of town, and he was to take over the small company soon anyway, so he came. His bright smile and twinkling blue eyes knocked her world out of its axis. 

              They talked all night. Not those pretentious, boring conversations. Actual conversations. He told her stories about his sisters and his best friend. How his best friend was the best person in the world, how he struggled so much and yet never once lost his kindness. How his sisters were always up to mischief. Bucky's eyes shine bright at those simple anecdotes, and she shone with him, for him. 

              After that, he would sneak in through her window some nights and they would talk in hushed tones or nap cuddled to each other. He would leave by dawn, a couple of hours before his Father expected him to appear and help him with the business. Other nights, he would appear by the front door, by the end of the afternoon a bouquet of flowers in his hand and the most charming smile she had ever seen. He would hand her the flowers and shake her father’s hand and then he would whisk her to dance the night away. 

              And then….And then the war happened. And her heart would beat stronger and more anxiously every time she remembered that soon Bucky would be one of those boys that needed to enlist. He would say that everything would be fine, he would kiss her worries away leaving her flushed and distracted, only focusing on getting his lips back on her again. 

              But he got drafted. 107th infantry, leaving to the other side of the ocean, first thing after that 1A was seen by him. Bucky took her out dancing the night before he was sent away from her. She was left with a promise: he would go back to her, no matter what. And then he gave her a ring. Not something that would symbolize the promise of marriage, but the promise of his love. 

              He left with her heart in his pocket. She cried the entire day after she was him waving from the ship, him getting smaller the more the embarkation got away from her. Steve consoled her, held her hand and told her everything would be okay. But he too left for bootcamp, leaving her for the war. 

                he took over the company soon after her dad fell sick. It was a couple of years into the war, the ring Bucky had given her heavy on her finger. They exchanged letters, he would profess his love in every single one of them. But she could tell his exhaustion, she could tell the trauma he was facing. Then the letters stopped altogether for months. And she braced for the worst. 

              She buried herself in work and money and lavish parties for those horrible months. She filled her pool with champagne, swam in it with the best artists in New York. Inside she was bleeding, absent of a heart. She missed Bucky. She missed everything about him. 

              A letter came in the mail with his hand-writing on it and suddenly the parties weren’t needed anymore. He told her Steve was different now, like someone had injected steroids on him, and someone most likely had. He told her he had been captured and taken as a POW for those months he didn’t write.  He was sorry that she worried for him. 

              She was just glad he was alive. She was just glad that she could see a light at the end of the tunnel. The war was ending, Hitler was nearing a dead end, the Allies would win and Bucky would come back home to her and everything would be alright.

              Then again, hope really is for suckers. MIA. Three little letters changed her life forever. She had officially lost her heart. Forever. 

              She forfeited her right to the company. She remained on the board, but was rarely ever seen near the company’s building. She bought a house near the beach, few neighbors and quiet enough to live the rest of her life in peace. As much peace as she could get. 

              Sometimes she would fall back into bad habits: lavish parties, blowing her money on the ballet, not remembering enough of the night in the morning after. Most times, she would just live through the day and stare at the sea during the night, hoping and praying to whatever was out there that at least Bucky found some peace in the after life, just like she was trying to find hers. 

              She lived in that house for 50 years. She died in the house and left it and all of her money to Bucky’s sister, Rebeca.

              And that was how Bucky discovered the house. He got a letter from a nephew he didn’t even know of that there were some letters addressed to him in the attic of his house and he would like Bucky to have them. 

              Bucky headed to the house, soon after he got the letter. The man welcomed him to the house--his home--and Bucky took notice of the little things about it. The walls were littered with pictures of family. Pictures of his sister growing older with her husband and kids. He guided him to a big and oddly cluttered attic. The nephew showed him a couple of boxes with Bucky’s name scribbled on it. 

              Bucky gave his nephew--God it was weird to call a man older than him that--a strained smile and the man left him alone. Bucky sat on the ground in front of the boxes and took out his gloves. He ran a hand through his short hair, sighing. It was weird to be in front of these. Because these things belonged to a man that was long dead. He wasn’t that guy anymore. He wasn’t the Winter Soldier anymore. He was somewhere in between.

              He took out a small knife from his pocket  and tore the tape that held the box closed. He opened the box carefully and took a peek inside. 

              There were clothes on top of it all. He took it off. A jacket, military one with Sargent Barnes stitched on it. He did know how his sister ended up with it, how it wasn’t lost in the destruction of war was beyond him. He set it aside in his lap and moved to the rest of the items in it. 

              There were a lot of photo albums of when he was a kid and a teen. He spent a lot of time browsing through them, trying to remember those memories, trying to convince himself it belonged to him. Once he was finished with that box he moved on to the next. 

              The box was filled with letters. Stacks and stacks of letters most of them addressed to him. As soon as he opened one of them he recognized immediately who wrote them. 

              He hadn’t thought about her yet. He had refused to. It hurt too much. But he was still there with the letters on his hands, delicately caressing them as if she was there with him. She wasn’t, and it hurt too much. 

              He sighed and opened one of them. It dated a week after he was declared MIA.

              21/01/45

              Dear Bucky, 

              According to the Army, you’ve been missing for a week. I’ve been missing you for longer than that.

              God, I don’t even know why I’m writing this letter, you’ll never get to read this. Colonel Phillips was very adamant that you were most likely dead. I guess I just need to get this off my chest. 

              I just miss having you around. I miss everything about you. Your smile, your eyes, your voice. A hole was carved in my chest when you left and it will never be full again. I’ll never find what I had with you. 

              I never took the ring off. I never forgot you Bucky, not in the years you were away. Well, I guess you’ll always be away now.  

              I’m so sorry, Bucky. I’m so sorry you couldn’t come back from the war. I’m so sorry you couldn’t come back from the war. I’m sorry we couldn’t be together for more than we were. 

              I love you, Bucky. I’ll always miss you, like I’m missing my heart.

                He sniffed and swallowed nervously. He folded and returned the letter in the envelope. He opened another. 

              14/01/46

              Dear Bucky,

              It’s been a year since you were declared MIA. 

              I spent the day with Rebeca. She’s getting married in a couple of months and I was helping her with the planning. It was good, it took my mind off the emptiness of this day.

              She’s so happy Bucky. You would have liked the guy, he’s a smart guy, like you. He’s so sweet and respectful and he’s good for her. 

              She went to college, Buck. Can you believe it? She wants to take over your dad’s business so she made sure she was prepared. 

              You would’ve been so proud of her. She misses you. I know she does. She just never says it. 

              I love you, Bucky. 

              He then opened another. And another, and another and another and another. He wasn’t sure how long he stayed in the dusty attic. It felt like a decade. It was probably just a couple of hours. He dug through every single letter of that box, craving for those moments he lost, he was robbed of. 

              At the very bottom of the box he found a tiny velvet box. He opened it. The ring he had given her sat perfectly in the velvet cushion of the box. He took it. He remembered buying that ring. He had enlisted Steve to help him out, insisting he’d come. 

              He was so nervous she wouldn’t like it, fearing it may have been too much. But he remembered the way she smiled and teared up at his confession. He remembered how she flung herself at him, smashing her lips on his with passion and so much love. 

              He loved her still. He hadn’t had the chance to stop loving her. And maybe if he had he wouldn’t have stopped. He doesn’t know, he was robbed of so many things and this was only one of them. 

              He sighed and returned all the letters to the box. He came downstairs and chatted a bit with his nephew, before asking if he could get those boxes. He said yes, of course, mom would have wanted that. 

              He took those boxes to his apartment in Brooklyn. On the bad days he would read back those letters, just to feel a bit of love. On the good days, he would look at them and think about the life he’d have to live for those people he had left behind, that he was ripped away from. 

              He’d have to make sure he’d live his best life for them. 

[with-love-anu]

The New Neighbour 1

PAIRING: Sirius Black x Reader

Series Masterlist

Sirius sat down at the table yawning. James was just back from his run and was making a smoothie for himself.

“Morin’” Sirius mumbled.

“Good morning.”

Sirius poured himself some coffee, making himself a sandwich.

“How many steps today?”

“14 K . It’s getting better, I am nearing the goal.” James said smiling as Sirius nodded.

“James, you are amazing, they’ll regret not having you on the team.” Sirius said taking a big bite of the bread.

“I know, I know. I just want to make sure my audition goes well.” They heard some fumbling and turned to see Remus coming out of his room with disheveled hair.

James sighed.

“Were you up again, reading all night?”

“In my defense, there were just 5 chapters left.” Remus said, boiling some water for tea.

There was a knock on the door and Sirius groaned.

“Must be the encyclopedia man. I’ve told him so many times we are not interested, yet he wouldn’t just listen.” Sirius got up fussing and opened the door.

“WE DON’T BLOODY NEED YOUR ENCLYCOPEDIAS! GET A HINT! …fuck off?” Sirius stopped yelling seeing a (Y/h/c) haired girl standing outside.

“Oh… hello?” Sirius whispered, cursing himself for behaving such in front of a cute looking stranger.

“I assure you I would not try to sell any encyclopedias to you.” She said with an amused smile and Sirius clenched his eyes shut.

“I’m (Y/n) by the way. I was moving into 18 B and thought I’d introduce myself.” (Y/n) said with a smile.

“Sirius.” Sirius said giving the girl a smile. He opened the door wider and gestured to his friends.

“He’s James and he’s Remus. We’re roommates.”

“James, Remus this is (Y/n) and she’s moving in 18 B.” (Y/n) gave a small wave, smiling at them.

Remus furrowed his brows.

“You aren’t (Y/n) (Y/l/n), are you?”

“The very same.”

“Holy shit!” Remus said widening his eyes. “I am Remus Lupin, we’ve conversed several times through mail?” (Y/n) gasped.

“Oh, hi! I adore your feedback on my books! Thank you so much!”

“I love them so so much!! Your poetry is a-amazing!”

James and Sirius watched the scene play before them in amusement. ‘Who the hell was this girl’ Sirius thought. ‘And how did she look so perfect in the morning?’

“It was so nice meeting you guys! I must go now.” (Y/n) said giving them all a tight nod.

As soon as the door closed, Sirius stalked towards Remus.

“Okay spill. Who is she?” Sirius asked.

“She’s a poet. She’s written so many books like- “Thinking out loud” and “Dreams and fantasies”. I’ve read them all and I know she’s a super sweet person. She always answered my mails, takes time to address questions and replies.”

“So are we just going to ignore the fact that Sirius straight up told her to fuck off?” James smirked at Sirius, making him release a groan. Remus laughed.

“Well, the encyclopedia man comes at the same time!!!”

“Is it only me or Sirius checked her out the whole time?” Remus asked James.

“Oh, he did.” James said looking towards Sirius.

“Sirius, can I request you to please not sleep with this one girl; because A: She’s gonna be our neighbor and B: I really like talking to her.”

“Not that it was going to happen, but fine.” Sirius grumbled.

***

You moved into your new apartment a few days later. The neighbors seemed to be very welcoming. And Sirius… well, he was hot. You put on some music and got to setting up the house. You had already got the shifters to place the heavy furniture into their specific rooms, so you had much lesser stress. There was a knock on the door. You frowned going to see who it was. Sirius, your new neighbor was here.

“I’m sorry. Was the music too loud?” you asked.

“Oh no, it’s fine.” He said shrugging. “I just thought I’d check up on you.”

“I was just setting up the house.” You opened the door wider so he could look in.

“Would you like some help? Me and James have nothing much to do and are pretty much bored out of our minds. Plus, bonding experience.” Sirius said gesturing between him and you and you let out a giggle. Sirius smiled widely, he loved that sound.

“Well if you insist,” you said.

Sirius went back to his apartment, and switched off the T.V.

“Hey!” James groaned. “I was watching that!”

“Come on, (Y/n)’s setting up the house and I offered we would help her.”

“You bloody never help cleaning this house and offered to help her set up hers?” James asked raising his eyebrows.

“Well I am being a good neighbor and you should too. Come on, get up!”

“You like her.” James pointed out. Sirius felt a blush rising on his cheeks.

“No, I don’t. I just want to be a good neighbor and do a nice thing.” Sirius said looking away.

“Oh my god, you do like her.” James laughed and Sirius glared at him, making him stop.

“Okay let’s go.” James mumbled.

“Hello there, neighbor!” James said as he came in and you gave him a warm smile.

“Hey James, are you sure you want to help me? I feel very selfish taking both of your time.”

“Oh shush. I am happy to help.” James grinned. “Wow, the colors are lovely!” he said looking around.

“Thanks!” you said opening up the lighting box. You took out the lamp, the neon lights and other fancy bulbs. Sirius and James were beside you, helping you clean them.

The three of you spent hours un-boxing, cleaning, talking and having fun. Strange, how with better company, work seems so much easier. Sirius constantly flirted with you, a thing you thought he did with everyone. He was apparently a fashion designer and James a fitness trainer and owned the gym named “potters”. You sighed opening the last box. Your paintings. Portraits of acquaintances, complete strangers and best friends. James and Sirius gasped as you took the canvases out.

“You draw too?” Sirius asked with widened eyes making you giggle.

“Yes. I actually love doing a hell a lot of things and hence take up only part-time jobs. I’ve sketched and painted as long as I could remember. All over the years, travelling to different countries, writing and working as a part time designer and editor; I kept the habit alive. Took out my canvas and brushes whenever someone seemed to pluck an inspiration in me.”

Sirius looked at the different canvas in awe. Was there one thing, you couldn’t do?

“You seem to have so many talents!” Sirius said softly.

“Ahhhh… well, thank you.” You said as you felt heat crawl up your face.

“Mate, look at this one!” James said pointing out the Jack’s painting.

“This is Jack. He owned a bar at the outskirts of Amsterdam. He was about 72 years when I met him. Never saw someone so full of life and energy. And he was pretty open minded too. Talked to depressed people at the pub, always leaving them feeling happier.”

James gave you a wide smile.

After putting up the canvases in the room you let out a long breath.

“Thank you so much, guys! Couldn’t have done this without you. Let’s go eat somewhere. Does pizza sound good? My treat.” You asked them, relieved that you settled in much faster than you had hoped.

“Well I can’t deny anything when it comes to you, my love.” Sirius said smirking and you blushed and widened your eyes slightly. You turned towards James, who grinned and nodded.

“You could call Remus too, if he’s not busy.”

“He’ll probably be reading some book right now. He loves doing that. He is actually an editor. Wait, meet me outside, I’ll call him” James said and turned to leave. You went in and grabbed your coat, keys and your purse.

Sirius was looking at a picture when you came back.

“Ready?” Sirius smirked. You nodded. He gave you his hand which you took it, giggling. Did he have to be so charming in everything he did?

Remus gave you a small smile as he saw you. You all went to the local pizza place laughing and chatting. They seemed to be very nice people. You hoped you all could be friends.

“And then he goes in and is like ‘whaaat’; and I am like, ‘bitch please, you knew this would happen’.” James recounted, making you snort. Your cheeks were already hurting with how much you laughed and there were tears in your eyes. As you all returned towards the apartment, you stopped by the ice-cream truck for some treats.

When you went to bed that night, you smiled. You felt happy after a long time, talking to genuine people, not someone who was all too intent on making a good impression on you.

The boys however grinned and smirked at Sirius. They had every well seen Sirius act differently around you.

“So, I saw someone watching (Y/n) as if she held the world.” James teased.

“Shut up, she’s just very nice and a really cute person.” Sirius said not quite meeting his friends eyes. Remus mock gasped.

“Never. Never have I heard in the last 12 years of our friendship, that Sirius finds a girl ‘just very nice and a really cute person’” Remus said air quoting.

“They are either: hot, really hot or meh. Did the sun rise from the west today or has our pretty little Sirius finally fallen in love?” James said cocking an eyebrow. Sirius rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Okay, I might like her.” he said pointedly.

James hooted and Remus threw his hand up in the air.

“Finally! someone he actually likes. What do you think Remus? Though I am happy for him, how long do you think before he messes up?”

“A week.” Remus said winking at Sirius, making him groan.

“I hate you guys.”

“You know you love us!” they laughed as Sirius went to his room shouting-‘fuck you!’

A/N: I’ve completed the series. I’ll be posting it everyday. Stay tuned. And this is my second series, the first one wasn’t much of a hit so feedback would be greatly welcomed! And ahhh... yes, prepare for some pinning