#I still see it but it might not be as common as I think

[molecularhomosexual]

wanted to add some thoughts on this thread. i've seen a lot of responses from professors and educators who care quite a bit for their students and create space for them to be able to put effort toward understanding things--and this latter perspective synergizes with being against using AI for essays at school. i wanted to add some more thoughts onto this with the context of: getting to work in teaching and learning shops at universities, i've found a huge variance between the care and patience that professors have for their students with essay-style assignments.

higher ed seems to be becoming quite interested in checking for ai-based plagiarism in essays (might be happening in k12 spaces too, i'm just not familiar with it as much). turnitin, the company that does the whole plagiarism checking software for schools and colleges, now has an ai detection tool that clients can purchase (that also, in our testing, pulls up far more false positives and false negatives than what they advertise to clients). the company always publicly claims that the turnitin similarity checker (this is the main "plagiarism detection" tool) is not exactly a watertight tool, it is a tool that can help with starting conversations about academic integrity with students, and it needs to be paired with instructor expertise on the topic. this ends up conflicting with a common-enough attitude among some faculty that turnitin is getting a perfect match on whether a student has plagiarized or not. combine this move in higher ed with:

depending on how a course is run, the fact of activities being graded in those courses can add a great deal of pressure on students that may not be conducive to learning. i think Jesse Stommel has some compelling stuff to say here through his concept of ungrading: he notes how grading systems have become increasingly comparative and numerical over time, he notes that grades in and of themselves aren't great incentives for learning or the best indicators of feedback in learning, grade-based education tends to favor (or at least be more amenable to) the banking model of education over critical pedagogy--and he backs this up with in-class experiments and experience. i've noticed that creative writing programs have often been at the forefront of finding alternatives to grading systems that are more supportive for their students (Asao Inoue talks about labor-based grading contracts as more equitable than grading systems that connect grades to an evaluation of quality, though I do think even this system could cut out the grading component altogether and still retain its interventional value).

these two points can lead to the following: students often have to do two tasks in an essay being graded: a) write an essay in and of itself, with its intent of critical thinking, effort, analysis; and b) get a good grade, because regardless of the actual material efficacy of grades in getting future work outside of the university (this will cash out differently sometimes based on the field you're working in as well), there will be students who feel a pressure to get good grades (for a variety of reasons). multiply one essay in a course with taking 4 or 5 more classes (common in undergrad) and working a job at the same time (common at my alma mater at the very least), and we're creating a recipe for students to feel absolutely unsupported in the academic environment to actually work on practicing analysis without additional outside pressure.

i think the current conditions across a lot of academia help create conditions for students to use cheating as a strategy to get a better grade: "i can either put all the extra work in to doing this right and possibly get a bad grade anyway, depending on how my professor is deciding to grade the quality of essays; or given that i have a shift to run to after this and family to take care of at home, i can see if there's a quicker solution to take, even if that could also have a risk of ruining my grade. what's worth it, to me?" and in response to this, academic integrity offices will start wondering how to discourage students from cheating, and in happy and hawkish response, academic integrity software companies can get new product contracts on their ai detection tools, that instructors, in their variance of usage of plagiarism tools, can use to either have conversations with students about work in the best case scenario, or punish students through grading them poorly in the worst.

i dunno. i am a philosopher at the end of the day--in my experience with the kind of writing philosophy demands, i don't think that AI writing passes muster in the first place (i imagine this is the case with... most any field that involves any amount of creative writing). but i just want to keep in mind that in my experience working at the university space, for every professor who is genuinely interested in their students' learning and who does everything within their capacity to set them up for success, there is a professor who, regardless of interest, generates a great deal of distress for their students by dispensing with punitive measures in the learning space.

i think that this is likely a reason why some teaching and learning shops have tended to build guidelines for how to use or discuss AI writing with students instead of recommending faculty to discourage its use by students altogether: even though i think a shop should ideally be able to recommend the latter, that doesn't do a lot for the reactionary portion of a faculty community who will consider the shop backwards for making such a recommendation, then continue on with teaching practices that are harmful to students' learning and well-being. (i think the defensive position also comes from not having any deciding power over the business contracts for AI software happening with leadership doing kingdom-building far away from the rest of us [unionize, anyone?], where if there's an evaluation that there's nothing the institution can do to prevent AI usage, then it makes sense to have a damage mitigation strategy to do the least harm to students as possible).

i would have been lucky to have any of the teachers on this thread as my own when i was going through undergrad. unfortunately, what i faced far more were instructors who didn't care very much--either from being tenure-track researchers who weren't particularly committed to teaching, or from (understandably) reacting against being overworked adjunct lecturers who didn't have the capacity to care as much as they should have. what i faced in undergrad quite a bit, barring some notable exceptions here and there, were instructors who didn't care anyway whether i could think critically about something or put effort into writing about a certain perspective. what i faced in undergrad, primarily so, were instructors who were just checking if i could say the correct thing back to them in the correct way--and instructors who would punish me or my peers for failing to do this, no matter how much work they put into an assignment.

if universities as an institution want students to not use AI for essays (something that i'm generally aligned with), they need to give adequate resources to faculty and students alike to be able to focus on essays without fear of academic punishment and without generated lack of capacity from overwork. (but of course, universities is an abstraction here--faculty/staff unions and student worker unions do push for those resources, because university leadership isn't otherwise interested in granting them, because it's not particularly profitable to care about the conditions of learning.)

[calliopesdiary]

i wish i were heather...

synopsis: you were under the impression that you were stable in your secret long-term relationship with three of the four marauders, until it becomes clear that you aren't the girl they want anymore. (so you think). will you lose them before its too late? or have you already?

pairings: fem!reader x poly!marauders ` poly!marauders x lily evans

warnings: NO LILY SLANDER!! SHE'S PERFECT AND BEAUTIFUL AND ITS NOT HER FAULT!!, cusswords, ANGST, depressing, a blip of reader skipping meals on the radar but it's srsly nothing crazy, insecure reader, the marauders besides peter are dicks, reader is a little naive, the marauders borderline cheat on you, no happy ending, there might still be one thoughhh, possibly slytherin!reader if you squint?,

part one in the conan gray series

A/N!!: In some of the fic i use colors to represent a certain character! Orange is Lily, Red is James, and Green is Barty :3

wc; 2.4k

LIFE WAS AMAZING, which is not usually how stories begin.

You felt so safe and secure in your secret relationship with Hogwarts' once most eligible bachelors... The Marauders.

The rush of excitement that coursed through your veins every time you shared a hidden glance with Remus, or hiding in the showers of the Gryffindor boys locker room with James after his quidditch victory, and sneaking off to empty classrooms where anyone from anywhere could catch you with Sirius.

It was heavenly, these boys were all you would ever need.

until... now.

You were in Remus' sweater, he said it looked better on you than it did him. If only he knew how much you liked him...

The fireplace erupted with a citrine glow, illuminating the Gryffindor common room beautifully.

Most impactfully, it lit up Remus' scar-kissed features.

His freckles looked as if they were painted onto his face with careful hands by a renaissance painter.

His eyes half-lidded from his lack of sleep from the incoming full moon that was slowly approaching, it pained you to know how much they hurt him.

For once, Remus wasn't in a sweater. Since his was rested comfortably on your body, as your scent comforted The Wolf greatly.

And his scent comforted you, too.

Remus' book had suddenly landed on your lap, and though it startled you a bit. You didn't bother to ask why, until you sat up.

Remus was locked in a passionate conversation with Gryffindor's resident golden girl, Lily Evans.

"Evans, it's lovely to see you."

"Same to you, Lupin."

Godric, was she beautiful.

"I just stopped by to see if you had gotten any of the Defence Against The Dark Arts homework done?"

Lily Evans was as radiant as an angel who blessed anyone with her presence.

"I have; actually, I just finished my paper."

Remus seemed mesmerized by her, the golden gleam from the fire painting her features gorgeously in that same citrine glow as Remus'.

"Could I have a look of it? Not to copy it- obviously, I just want to see how others are wording the question."

You weren't even half as pretty as Lily.

"Of course, and I know you'd never cheat."

"You're the smartest witch in our year."

You tried not to mind other girls flirting with your boys.

Just because you knew that later that night they'd be back to your boys again, and only yours.

As she was about to go, she planted a soft kiss on the side of Remus' cheek, leaving him blushing softly as he bid her goodbye.

Your heart clenched, it was merely a pleasantry. You were being dramatic.

"Are you alright, dove?" Your head perked up at the sound of Remus' voice.

"Hm? Yeah, I'm fine." You mused, albeit a bit absentmindedly.

"Are you tired?" He asked carefully.

"I am, actually..." You forced a sweet smile onto your lips, as he leaned down to kiss them softly.

That kiss was the last one that felt anything more than a chore, an obligation.

That was also your last kiss with Remus.

Cheering James on at the quidditch pitch was just the thrill you needed after that melancholy moment with Remus.

He soared through the field like he was on top of the world, the players scattered around the pitch for one common goal: to win.

Gryffindor had won the game with 60 points, and James had caught the snitch like usual.

This game was also a rain game.

Just as you were about to head down to showers when you spotted Lily excitedly trailing after James.

You knew full well that James chased Lily tirelessly since they started school, that was also well before you came into the picture.

You also knew that she wanted nothing to do with him or the other marauders, so what was with her infatuation now?

Why your boys? She couldn't find her own boys?

But maybe she was just being friendly, right? The boys would never ever cheat on you... right?

You heard Lily giggle as James so graciously held the curtain open for her to enter the locker room, and your heart clenched.

You followed them in, jealously.

"James?" You called, as James poked his head from the changing area. Sweat glistening off his abs.

"Hi, Y/N." He shut the curtain behind him, as if he had something to hide.

Also; he barely just called you by your first name.

"You didn't come to see me after the game?" You questioned, grazing his cheek gently as he spoke."

"Sorry, Y/N. It was a long one." He excused, as he clearly looked a bit flushed.

"You look red, are you dehydrated?"

"Godric, y/n. you are hardly my mum."

You giggled as if it was a joke, yet he seemed quite stone faced.

You cleared your throat embarrassingly once you realized.

"I... just wanted to congratulate you on another win." You forcefully smiled again.

"Thank you, I really appreciate that." Then, he flashed his classic grin at you.

The grin he hadn't flashed at you since he realized he genuinely liked you.

What the fuck?

"Victory kiss?" You asked quietly, with some false hope mixed in.

"Of course." He pecked your forehead quickly, before hurrying off back to his changing area.

And with that, you had also left the steamy tent and outside into the cool, soft rain once more.

A forehead kiss? whenever he used to give you victory kisses they'd be full-on make outs in that same changing room or the showers.

James was falling out of love with you, and you knew it.

Luckily, you could easily disguise your tears with the excuse of it raining.

"Victory kiss?" Lily mewled, from her position on the stool in his changing spot.

"Just on the forehead, lovely."

You stopped showing up to breakfast, as the one time you decided to go Lily was sat in your spot next to Sirius.

Dorcas was nearly at her wits end with the boys and their antics.

The motley crew of Slytherins were the only ones who knew of your relationship, and they were pissed off.

"Treasure, surely they aren't fucked enough to know that you are the best thing they've ever had!" Barty explained, laying upside-down on his bed across from you.

"I-It's no use, Jr." You cried softly, mirroring his position yet on your bed instead. The tears (and blood) rushing to your hairline instead of your face because Dorcas said 'Your makeup is too pretty to ruin, love.' .

"There is a use, Y/L/N. we'll kill them-"

"Jr, absolutely not." Regulus chided, rubbing your shoulder. "She's clearly upset, I don't see the issue."

"Murder is never a good option, Barty." Dorcas scolded gently.

"So what are we gonna do then? My Treasure can't go on like this!"

"You said you've already talked to James and Remus? Maybe you can go talk to... eh... Sirius." Clearly, that name was hard for Regulus to get out.

"*Sniff* yeah, yeah- I'll go talk to him..." You sat up half-hazardously, and strutted out of the dorm-room to go (hopefully) save your relationship.

You still remember the third of December.

Sirius lounged on the couch while speaking with the other marauders, about some sort of prank on the other group of Slytherins.

"And then, we'll-"

"Hi, Siri." You sat next to him, beaming up at him (hopefully).

"...y/n." He greeted casually, before continuing to talk.

Your smile faded, as he continued to talk to your other boyfriends friends about this horrible prank.

Instead of leaving, you sat quietly next to them, as if you were some decoration or trophy wife.

This was truly your breaking point, as you saw Lily sit down on the couches of the common room as she caught all of their attention, you hadn't seemed to do that for ages. Though, she was wearing something familiar...

Remus'... sweater...

Remus'- YOUR Remus' sweater.

"How's it look?" Lily asked, giving them a twirl. Their eyes locked on her.

"Gorgeous, doll." Sirius flirted, shooting her a wink.

"Truly a sight for sore eyes." James grinned.

"It looks better on you than it did me." Remus took her hand and helped her sit down on the couch in between him and James.

That's exactly what he said to you...

He put his arm 'round her shoulder,

suddenly you got colder.

She's got them mesmerized... while you die.

But how could you hate her?

She's such an angel...

But then again you wished she were dead.

"Why would you ever kiss me?" You asked impulsively.

"What?" James looked up from Lily, all eyes on you.

"I mean- I'm not even half as pretty."

"Y/n, You're overthinking it-" Remus started it.

"You gave her your sweater!" You shot back.

"It's just polyester!" Remus defended.

"But you like her better." You felt the tears rush to your waterline.

"We're done." You whispered, leaving Lily looking so confused and the common room dead quiet.

"What does she mean by that...?" Lily seemed horrified.

"We... weren't really dating.." Sirius attempted to defend.

"Yes, we were, you tosser!" James shoved him.

"You said yourself that you were bored of her!" Remus stated matter-of-factly.

"Was I seriously the other woman?" Lily mewled, her hands clutching the sides of her head.

"Nonono- No, we were planning to break up with her but- because we all wanted you-" Sirius tried again.

"Then don't fuck around with her feelings just to get me!" Lily yelled, standing up quickly.

"I appreciate the admiration- but I need time to process, okay? You all were absolute... arseholes to her, I'll admit." Lily started,

"Are you saying no?" James quickly cut in.

"...No..." Lily ended.

After crying your eyes out to Barty and Regulus over your breakup, December 7th rolled around.

The day that students were meant to be studying for their OWLS and other end of term exams.

You would usually be in the library 24/7.

Lily, had finally come around and accepted the boys' proposal, and their relationship became public quickly.

Lily obviously still felt this bitter taste of guilt in her mouth, as did all of them.

So today, Lily had convinced them all to apologize to you for borderline cheating and lying and manipulating and gaslighting-.

But, you were nowhere to be found.

"Regulus! Regulus, wait up!" Lily ran through the hallways to get to her.

"Evans, Brother.. Potter... and Lupin.." She said those last three names with utter disgust.

"We're trying to find Y/n, have you seen her?" Remus asked quietly, he was definitely feeling the most guilt.

"Y/n? Well, If she was here, I think she'd completely refuse to see you lot." Regulus explained bluntly.

"W-What do you mean "If she was here"?" James questioned.

"I mean, Her, Junior., and the Rosier twins completed their OWLS early and hightailed it to Junior's holiday house for the rest of the break." He explained casually.

"What?" Sirius scowled.

"What the hell is my girl-... Y/n doing with them?" James had the same expression as Sirius.

"They are simply better friends then you were to her, hm? I don't blame her."

"When will she be back?" Lily asked breathlessly.

"End of December, If she ever returns." Regulus strolled away, potions book in hand.

"...We fucked up."

Fin.

[thementalshawty]

PAC WHAT TYPE OF LOVE IS ENTERING YOUR LIFE?

Hey my baby babes! Here is the reading I promised you guys!!! This reading been on my mind since I did the last one honestly and I’m guessing some of you are curious but instead of asking spirit of love is coming into your life I’m going to ask what kind of love because love comes in our life everyday in big and small ways so I decided to ask in what way love is entering your lives soon.

🧟🧟‍♂️🧟🧟‍♂️🧟🧟‍♂️🧟🧟‍♀️🧟‍♂️🧟‍♀️🧟‍♂️

Pile 1

Now I know a lot of you are thinking the worse when you see this card but I’m not getting anything negative or low energetic about this love coming in. Actually quite the opposite, I heard liberating. There’s something here that you and this person share in common that’s coming in, honestly the kind of love I’m hearing is through a trauma bond maybe? I’m seeing two people praising one god or goddess. I’m seeing that it may be a friendship here. It can be a same sex love too if that’s what you’re into, I see carnal pleasure being fulfilled here, friends with benefits for sure!!! I’m not getting romantic vibes honestly from this, I’m seeing this love is a love that helps you break the chain that you are currently in, you can be in a cycle that you’re completely unaware of. This person can be a Capricorn, be Capricornic, they are not a satanist or satanic and even if they’re into that they’re not into bringing you into it I’m hearing sacred so what they believe in is very sacred they very RARELY SHARE THAT! This is why again I don’t feel it’s a romantic love it can even be a new belief that’s coming and not a person if you get my drift or some kind of inspiration, love comes in very many a way so we need to look for something deeper sometimes and this isn’t a romantic love, I’m seeing it can be sexual or passionate though here, exploring each others carnal fantasies! so fuccin funny the bottom of the decc is the 8oS! so even more confirmation! You’re gaining freedom from whatever chain you’ve got going on in your head! Youre binded to a thought about yourself some kind of belief and I see it coming undone and since there’s two people I do believe someone else is involved but again idk if it’s romantic im still not seeing it go anywhere more than some wild nights together frfr but i see you’ll be so beyond happy you met this person it’s like a pent up farmer girl who becomes friends with the free spirited city girl roommate showing her how to let loose vibes. That’s very much the energy im getting from this pile, you may be meeting your bestie here guys!!!

Thanks for Reading.

🍎🍏🍎🍎🍏🍎🍏🍎🍏🍎🍏

Pile 2

So the kind of love I see coming into your life isn’t romantically at all, welp, you or this person may see it that way, I’m seeing some kind of delusionary connection that’s coming into your life, it’s almost like it’s too good to be true, this person and it’s not that they’re not good it’s just like, they aren’t really into love or I’m seeing they’re not into you like that but you want them too be or you feel they might be or it can be that they feel this way about you and you don’t about them. There’s some kind of imbalance here between you and this person it can also be a disconnect from your heart and this love that’s coming in will help you reconnect with the badass mf that is you. I’m seeing that one of you could be hurt by love and emotions, hiding your cup and forcing it away, but this love will help you want to offer your cup but I don’t see it happening early on, I see this is a slow to romance connection if there’s any chance or possibility! If not then it’s a crush frfr that’s going to go south and you’ll realize this person HAS NOOOOOOOO feelings for you at all and that shit may destroy you, I’m sorry but it’s reality I feel like this connection is so delusionary that you can get lost in the wishful thinking, maybe they drop hints of affection or your misreading them. At the bottom of the deck you have the 2oP! so I’m seeing that there may be TWO types of love coming in, or a decision has to be made, maybe you wanted to date two people at the same time and it’s just not happening right for you, also I’m hearing your crush could be denying you but then someone else likes you, that you’re not even noticing it’s giving 5oC energy you’re only looking at what spilled and not even paying attention to what’s new and being offered. You will need to decide who you’re going to give your cup too because one of the choices are definite more romantic, balanced and will work out for you more than the other one. The choice is yours. Also I’m seeing some money coming in so you can chill, I feel like you are someone who never stops to take a break or breathe or nothing and this connection or this love that’s coming in whether it be a person promotion or both is some kind of disappointment, it’s going to help bring balance and control back into your life and it feels like you’ve been falling of your rotational strength as of late don’t worry baby you’ll get it bacc I promise. Don’t lose hope I’m hearing. I’m hearing that if it is a person that’s not for you don’t think less of you someone else is coming or is already there and you’re jus not giving them the time of day or you don’t think they want you either! I want more information about this one I will upload a deeper meaning to the reading on my Patreon.

Thanks for reading.

⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥⛓️‍💥

Pile 3

Now this kind of love is straight up TOXIC! I see that this is not romantic it all it just involves a woman or someone who identifies themselves with more feminine energies. This person is an energy vampire but I see you taking bacc what was stolen. I see that this can be a friend or family member but I’m seeing that this person is a emotional manipulator that love to play cat and mouse game to end up on top this person can be a water sign frfr cancer vibes mostly, this person is very low vibes and and energy they don’t want to do anything but cause chaos and destruction! You don’t need that in your life, like all the readings I’m seeing that this love coming in is bringing in major clarity it can be someone or something that helps you see the toxic person for what they are and take back your energy it’s giving that song by botdf bewitched. (I don’t stand with Dahvie but Jay Vanity (DAHLI) is my heart). I see that this person is used to being put on a pedestal by someone whether it be you or the ones around them, either way they’re very spoiled and they’re no good for you! I’m seeing that you’re going to finally see the truth for what it is. This person brings drama and dark clouds you’re going to want nothing to do with this person and you’re going to reclaim all of your power! its almost like whatever draining you will be poured back into you. You’re rubber, they’re glue what they do bounces off you and sticks back to them! You will also feel so liberated hmm this may be connected to pile 1 so if you felt pulled there then this may be the answer cos I think this is the part 2 or the more information it’s giving freedom too, but this is from an actual person it can be a negative ex you may be going too or friend someone that you let slide always on their shit I’m seeing that it’s going to end and that you’ll realize this person again it can even be you just being in low vibrational space and you’re finally becoming self conscious and doing something about it whether then just waiting for someone to come help. Self care is needed!! So self love is coming into your life fashoooooo SELF SELF SELF! Go and treat yourself to some grade A fun you deserve it.

Thank you for reading.

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

And just like that folks we are done I hope that this reading brought clarity and you guys enjoy it!

[trashywormeateroffics]

waited my whole life (steve rogers x reader)

the gif is not mine!

no summary it’s just a little thing, fluffy and reader struggling to be open with their emotions yay:)

a/n: well, long time no see….. i hope u enjoy!

masterlist

\\\\

“they really appreciate you, you know?” he says, still facing forward. he’s being going at this for months. trying to convince you that the team sees you as part of their family. the woods seem endless, stretched out by your tiredness from the mission and aching limbs still wrapped in a tact suit, and yet, though you cannot admit it to yourself, a whisper of a wish echoes through your mind. a wish for it to continue, on and on, perhaps on a loop. a wish for his company.

“i do too.”

he looks at you.

“you might be worse than me at taking a compliment.” you raise your eyebrows and huff out a laugh.

“one would think you out of everyone would know how to take praise.” you purse your lips, trying to hide an amused smile. “i mean, since you get it all the time.”

“right.” he scoffs, though his eyes twinkle with beguilement.

“i mean, the great captain america. everything that is wonderful and magical about this country.”

“that’s how you think of me?”

“i said captain america, not steve rogers.” he tilts his head.

“are they not the same?” you shrug your shoulders.

“what do you think?”

“once in a while you could answer a question without deflecting. won’t kill you.”

“it might.” your smile is mischievous. he shakes his head with fake exasperation. he never seems truly upset at you, never acts like having you around is an effort (even though you are pretty certain that it is), so, maybe, you could return the favor and be earnest for once.

you roll your eyes and huff. you’re not annoyed at him. you’re not annoyed at how he makes you feel. you’re just annoyed that it’s so hard to say, to show.

“you alright?” the space between his brows creases with soft concern. you open your mouth, ready to tell him that yes, you are fine. just tired from walking. you feel the deflection making its way up your throat, tensing your vocal chords, but he tilts his head and your mouth closes shut.

“you are steve.” he frowns, confused, and probably worried that you are experiencing a case of sudden amnesia, but before he can ask and deviate you from your mission, you continue. “there would be no captain america without steve rogers, but there would be a steve rogers without captain america.”

his eyes soften, and for a split millisecond you wonder if something just crossed his mind, or if he saw something behind you, because there is no way he could be looking at you like that. but then he says your name, it comes out breathy, almost with wonder, and so warm. you’ve never heard your name said like that. like a prayer, a prize, a solution. something good.

“don’t get all soft on me now, you’re still wearing the suit.”

he laughs an incredulous laugh. the corners of his eyes crinkle with mirth. it’s blinding, it’s light, it’s him.

“i’m always soft on you.” he says after he sobers up, though he is still smiling softly. “just waiting for you to realize it, sweetheart.”

that pet name. god. you might love it even more than when he says your name. he never calls anyone else by anything other than their name, or perhaps a common nickname. but never that. that is only for you. nat says it’s because you are the sweet part of his heart. you think his entire heart is sweet. you don’t understand how you could have a place there; he seems to know that, and that is why he reminds you over and over again in a million different ways that while you might not believe yourself deserving of it, that does not change the fact that to him you are rooted there. you want to be. there is nowhere else you’d like to rest.

you want to tell him everything. that he not only has put down roots in your heart, but that he has merged with the veins and the vessels that pump blood to it. that without him there wouldn’t be an empty space in your heart, there would simply be no heart. you want to be the person who loves loudly, he deserves that, but some wounds are still too deep, too fresh, and they seem to clog your lungs. the declaration gets stuck somewhere in between there and your throat (and your brain). it makes you panic, the fear that he cannot read your mind, your eyes, that he does not and will never know what he means to you, and that, at some point, he will leave to find someone who can and will tell him all of it. reassure him.

“steve…” it’s pleading. you’re sure you look like a scared animal, wild eyes and frantic breathing. without pausing his walk, he side steps a bit, getting closer to you. in a second your hand is enwrapped in his. he squeezes one, two, three times. then he caresses it with his thumb. your steps falter a bit, but you gather yourself quickly. it would’ve been unnoticeable to anyone, but not to him. you never go unnoticed by him.

he leans a bit, his mouth close to your ear and whispers, almost as a secret, as if not even the trees around you should be privy of it. only you.

“i’ll wait. whenever you’re ready. you’re worth all of it.” you shut your eyes tightly, trying to stop the onslaught of tears that are forming too quickly, trusting he will not let you fall as your feet keep moving forward. you hear him chuckle softly, barely, almost just to himself. you look at him. he’s already looking at you. he gives you a lopsided smile that makes you feel like he knows something you don’t, that maybe no one else does, before speaking again. “waited my whole life for ya, what’s a bit more time?”

and for the first time in your life, you believe someone. you believe him.

[mumblingsage]

#🤔 i remember reading about trauma being a psychic wound#from witnessing or experiencing an event where someone's physical integrity was threatened#i know you can't start talking about ptsd until 6 months after the event if you're still seeing effects from it#i'm not so sure about the formal definition of traumatized#bc most people heal after even really bad trauma. ptsd is what you get around 1/3 times when your psyche like. doesn't#so i think traumatized might be for shorter term effect? but still like a specific term for you know like an actual medical condition#and indeed i'm no health professional or expert but i'm p fucking sure that can't happen from stuff happening to fictional people#and much less from reading words on a page#anyway thank you for this post op

I also find these distinctions and definitions super interesting! (I'd say "fun" but it's just not a fun topic.)

-My understanding is that you're right, post-traumatic stress syndrome can't be diagnosed until 6 months after the event. If you're having stress symptoms in the immediate aftermath - and this is quite common, much more common than longer-term PTSD - it's called acute stress disorder (there's also 'adjustment disorder' which might overlap?). And people actually going through the fight-flight-or-freeze survival response to trauma may not be aware of themselves as particularly upset or realize they're having symptoms; those often emerge after the immediate threat is past. I cannot stress enough that people with PTSD are not weak and have not failed; to survive trauma requires immense resilience whatever the outcome. But PTSD also isn't an inevitable outcome. (George Bonnano's book The End of Trauma is poorly titled - he doesn't promise to end trauma - but was a really informative read on resilience.) Also, the fact that 85% of the people who evacuated the Twin Towers on 9/11 did not develop PTSD makes me skeptical of how many people would develop PTSD from reading or watching a movie; if as a species we're that resilient when our lives are truly threatened and death is all around us, I expect we'll be pretty resilient in milder circumstances. [However, some forms of trauma have far higher likelihood of PTSD than others because of different factors: for instance, about half of sexual assault survivors experience PTSD, because our culture really sucks at supporting SA survivors. The same article says 94% of survivors experience PTSD symptoms in the first 2 weeks; I think this is what the 'acute stress disorder' diagnosis is intended to cover.]

-So then what do we actually mean when we say "traumatized"? Speaking for myself as OP, I'd mean either/or 1. Developed symptoms of PTSD or acute stress disorder, or 2. Went through an experience known to lead to symptoms of PTSD or acute stress disorder (on which I'll defer to section A of the DSM-5's diagnostic criteria for PTSD), even if such symptoms didn't develop or have since resolved. This definition may be somewhat circular. It is not perfect (the DSM is not an unimpeachable document; at the same time, informed and caring people are always at work to improve it). But I think it gets at a real distinction that will emerge if we compare the experiences of, for instance, people who actually had a friend die suddenly in childhood vs people who just read Bridge to Terebithia.

-In hindsight it might have been helpful to define what I think it means to be "traumatized" in my OP, but it isn't easy to get the entire contents of Judith Herman's Trauma and Recovery plus Bessel van der Kolk's The Body Keeps the Score plus the odd discussion in the therapist's office into a concise blog post. And maybe it was more productive to leave the term undefined so each reader has to examine their own definition/understanding of it. (I'm giving myself too much credit. Even so.)

I'm wondering if, as a society who cares about vulnerable people, we could stop saying "traumatize" when we truly mean "upset"?

I am sick of hearing sad books or movies "traumatize" their readers. I simply do not believe that happens. A traumatic experience might be adjacent to books (I have vivid memories of books I was reading around certain experiences and even how the contents of those books affected my processing of the experiences). But it's not caused by the book. And, y'know. The weather is Christofascist Censorship Attempts outside.

Meanwhile from the other side I continue to be surprised at just how badly people fail to understand trauma and traumatic experiences in general. Watering down the term isn't helping. Find other hyperbole to express that The Bridge to Terebithia gutted you, chewed on your heartstrings, and made you cry your first pair of contact lenses right out of your preteen eyes.

[seltzer-tastes-pretty-good]

So, you wanna fight a god in a grove - GGG headcanons (will include some spoilers)

Because Great God Grove is my new fixation at the moment

Some headcanons on if you approached any of the gods in Great God Grove, and also how they'd respond to you actually trying it

Gonna be spoilers below the cut, just a heads up

Mitternacht:

If you say you're gonna do it: Might laugh you off, but also reprimand you on the subject. It's already poor form to pick on your elders, after all. You will also almost definitely get that "two of every animal on a boat" line from the main game as well

If you try it: First of all, shame on you. Second off, you're gonna be lifted up by the back of your shirt collar and gently placed down somewhere where you can sit in time out and think about what you tried to do. A dedicated god fighter might as well see results...and if they try it, they better like boats

Cobigail:

If you say you're gonna do it: Definitely gonna be the most enthusiastic about your efforts. You wanna try it, better give it all you got. She outnumbers you in arms and triples you in height. She's about to find out what a blood sacrifice is like, but she's gonna get it on her own...KIDDING! Well, she assumes you were just talking tough too

If you try it: Oh? You weren't kidding? Oh well. Gonna likely try to intimidate you away, still. That's more for your state than hers, though. As mentioned, she's huge and I'm pretty sure even a light bunch from any of those arms could prove fatal. Would likely humor you until she tires of it, then would casually toss you back into the schoolhouse from where you came from. Also prepare for mean/confused looks from onlookers thinking you were trying to threaten the harvest and several large roots popping up out of places to jumpscare you

Thespius

If you say you're gonna do it: Does he look like a guy who's ready to fight anything? He's gonna try and laugh you off at first, maybe question why you wanna do this? It's not like a mortal is getting anything out of this aside...bragging rights? In which case, congrats! You just beat up an all-powerful being that people were trying to look up too. You don't really come out of this, looking good

If you try it: Not even gonna throw a play-punch. All that's gonna happen is you get escorted from his cloud and likely not gonna be welcome back soon. Very common theme among these gods; more keen on just moving you someplace where you're not a danger to yourself

Click Clack

If you say you're gonna do it: then you're gonna get a long laugh out of them, followed by coming up with a humerous narrative on the subject. Will probably be the type to bring up that 'coughing baby vs hydrogen bomb' meme around you

"And spoiler alert" says Click Clack, "You're not the bomb in that scenario"

If you try it: You get hit on the head with that typewriter of theirs. Even then, just because their the smallest of the gods doesn't mean their not gonna be able to throw hands all the same. Hey, now that I think about it, fighting a god is probably a really bad idea

Bauhuazzo:

If you say you're gonna do it:

"No you're not." - Bauhazzo

If you try it: Have you ever tried fighting something made of solid stone? It's not gonna be an easy fight. He's going to wait until you get tired out, then, you guessed it, escort you out of his premises, and leave you to the judging angry looks of those in BuzzHuzz

Huzzlemug:

If you say you're gonna do it: This question honestly large depends on it's mood. It might shadow box with you for a bit to test your 'bravastrengusto', it might find your attempts to threaten someone like it hilarious, it might just up and tell you to "Leave." Bottom line, probably not gonna get serious

If you try it: ...that is, unless you throw the first punch. Like I said, it depends. You might get the 'get off my lawn' treatment (which you should be very used too by now), or you could get knocked out of BuzzHuzz altogether or, if Huzzle is sufficiently either angry or excited enough then, congratulations! This is the first god so far whom I'd think would actually genuinely fight you!

Inspekta

If you say you're gonna do it: Well, first of all, if they hear you say that, get ready to be jumped by any Bizzyboys in the vicinity for saying that. Second off, Inspekta will take it as a silly lil joke. He's not the type to be in-timid-dated by a mortal. Might also be the shadowboxing type, maybe throw a playpunch, but that's it

If you try it: Thankfully, Inspekta's the one god we do see fight. Granted, I doubt he was really out for blood, so we don't know what his full strength is like, but from what I seen, you probably ain't leaving much a scratch on the guy. Remember when I said Cobigail outnumbered you in hands to throw? Inspekta can do that, but literally. You probably ain't winning here

King

If you say you're gonna do it: Then congrats, you got a whole bunch of other gods mad at you, and Razzmatazz to boot. This is the main case where it's not the one you're threatening you need to worry about. King is very unlikely to try and humor the idea of hurting you, especially if you're just a high-strung/overly confident mortal

If you try it: You're gonna stop trying quick. King can settle the differences between gods, she can probably handle whatever's possessing you to challenge gods to fist fights

[glitchy-npc]

59 pretty please? ^^

[Post Re-gene and villain reveal. 778 words]

Ortega fidgets with the small, gold ring in his ear, rubbing the smooth metal between his finger and thumb and it warms quickly under his touch. It's become an increasingly common habit lately, a self-soothing gesture, it helps him think. He only wishes he could focus on what he really needed to get done instead of drifting towards memories of the man who gave him the earring in the first place. 

But his brain never did care about what he wanted and the memories come back anyway.

He remembers sitting in his kitchen and the familiar burn of tequila, a little liquid courage, while watching Tegan set a small box down on the table. 

“Last chance to back out, old man.” Tegan’s lopsided smile was a challenge. Why was that the detail Ortega noticed rather than whether those smiles ever reached his eyes or not?

“Do you really think I would?” He leaned back in his chair, the camouflage of cocky confidence as easy to put on as a pair of well worn shoes. 

“No.” Tegan snorted. “But you could have gone to a professional, they probably would have done it for free, for celebrity bragging rights.” 

“Hey, I’m not being a cheapskate here, besides…” His voice softened when he reached out to grab Tegan’s hand, giving it a quick kiss before the other man could protest. “I want you to do it, I trust you.” Only in hindsight could he see Tegan’s imperceptible wince.

“Fine, just don’t complain if you don’t like it and end up with a scar.” Did he really never used to notice Tegan’s eyes darting to the scar on his lip so often? His parting gift from Retribution. It’s still hard to comprehend they are one and the same. 

Ortega remembers Tegan opening the box and pulling on a pair of black nitrile gloves, the way his hands flexed until they sat just right and how meticulous he was about sanitizing the gloves and needle, along with the sharp smell of disinfectant. He had been that way in the old days too, whenever he had patched him up after a fight, methodical and clean, he thought he had just been overcautious.

But now he knows why. 

Could never risk an infection or a trip to the hospital, not with the tattoos being as good as a death sentence. If only he had known. If only he had been trusted to know.

He remembers Tegan gently pushing his hair behind his ear and repressing a shiver as he applied antiseptic to where the needle would go. How he stood, straddling one of his thighs to be close enough. So close. He wanted to place his hands on his hips, to slide his hands up under Tegan’s shirt and pull him closer. Into a kiss, into the countless fantasies he’d had of them making love in his kitchen. Maybe it was silly but that's what fantasies are. And what they are likely to remain. 

“Ok, keep still.” Tegan commanded, needle poised against his ear. “On the count of three. One…two…” 

He remembers the sharp sting as the needle pierced through his flesh. 

“¡Carajo! You didn’t even get to three.” It took all his willpower not to touch the instrument in his ear. An intrusion. One he wanted.

“You might have flinched otherwise.”

“I wouldn’t have!” The embarrassed surprise stung worse than the needle in truth.

“Don’t be a baby. You still want the gold hoop?” At least that was better than calling him old. 

“Yep, gold’s a classic.” Easy to throw the confidence back up while Tegan disinfected the jewelry. He was proud he didn’t wince as he threaded it through the new opening. Another scar.

“Not worried what other people will think it might mean?” Even prouder he didn’t wince at that. Did that really used to scare him that badly? That other people might suspect he wasn’t straight? 

“Not at all.” He can tell himself now it wasn’t a lie. “Besides, if anyone makes a big deal of it, I can say my boyfriend did it for me. Watch them say something then.” 

“Idiot.” Tegan rolled his eyes but allowed himself to be pulled into the kiss all the same. Something warm and wanted that didn’t chase away the pain but added to it in a way that made everything feel more. 

More present. More real.

Ortega shakes his head. Stops tugging at the earring and rubs his eyes. Tired. No light shines through the blinds, working late again, the dimly lit office a pale comparison to the bright warmth of the kitchen in his memories. 

But that's just how everything feels lately.

[leillaaaa]

hiii! about that one terukane post discussing the clock keepers’ original time period/location, i did some light searching and it mostly points to the clock keepers coming from around the 1800s! i’ll write down a few reasons why!

clothing:

mirai’s attire may seem a bit more western at first glance , but going off her sandals (sorry i’m not sure about the name) and the outfit under her cloak, it seems that it is either inspired or is the same as 1800’s japanese winter wear, with the same design, albeit with mirai’s design being a bit more puffy/flowy(?) see here:

so mirai’s outfit points to around the 1800’s, but what about kako and akane?

kako and akane don’t have much to go off, except for their sleeve garters/arm bands! sleeve garters started being manufactured around the late 1800’s, and they were used by people who needed to adjust their sleeves without much hassle! kako is shown to tinker with machinery, and we all know that can become seriously messy, so he uses sleeve garters to prevent his sleeves from being too long and messing with his work!

another thing to add are their tassels, which were used in the 1800’s as well(?)

other than their clothing, we can also refer to their boundary and the particular clock they used in chapter 111!

machinery:

the boundary mechanisms look particularly similar to clocks i found online that date back 200 years ago (i think) like this,

although i am not sure if this can be used as evidence as inspiration could be taken from any similar time periods, i believe that it most resembles the machinery of this particular era!

however, we can see that the big clock used to change the present/operated by the yorishiro has a unique style, quite unlike clocks today or the slim grandfather clocks we associate with the clock keepers! however, I found a clock quite similar to it that dates back to early-mid 1800’s (1800-1849)!

even though the time periods don’t nessecarily overlap, it still proves to be quite useful evidence!

it’s quite reminiscent of the big ben, built in 1943, overlapping with the manufactured period of the supernatural clock they used 🕰️, giving me reason to believe that the clock keepers might have made/maintained this when alive in that time period as mechanics!

lastly, the town!

not much to say here, but judging by the common people in the heart of the boundary and the fact that they spoke an unfamiliar language, i have reason to believe that kako might have originated from around europe, prob not in england, because akane learns english in school! (not accounting for older english)

i won’t say that it is in this specific location, because tbhk is obv a work of fiction with little to no actual ties to real locations, but i will say that the town is reminiscent of old luxembourg in ville-haute, to the south, which was known for its industry in the 19th century!

for reference:

sorry for the bad quality ahah

there are some holes here and there such as mirai’s japanese like clothing not matching kako’s more western attire, or why certain thing don’t overlap, but this is what i could find haha

so in conclusion i’d reckon the clock keepers to be from around the 1800’s in europe(my guess is old luxembourg city in villehaute, southern luxembourg), where kako is a mechanic known for his knack for machinery and mirai is either his adopted daughter from far away or a pinocchio-esque figure to keep kako company!

hope this helped!

WAHHH, TYYY !! This was so helpful, tysm !! (≧∇≦)b <3

[dirt-nerd]

Another thing to point out is that the bill is also a trojan horse designed to weaken our environmental legislation. I don't think its a coincidence that the first part of the bill announces that parliament can do whatever it likes as long as its in "everyones" best interest, while the second part completely strips Iwi of their right to be part of the consultation process.

Most environmental regulation in Aotearoa makes reference to the Treaty in some way, (for example see The Conservation Act, Resource Management Act, Exclusive Economic Zone Act, and probably a dozen more documents I can't think of right now). If Seymour's bill passes it would gut these portions of the legislation, making it that bit easier to do things like letting multinational corporations strip mine conservation estate.

Kiwis are inherently distrustful of politicians, so while your racist Uncle might never develop any empathy for Maori, there's a good chance he might still happily agree that Seymour is a slimy little rat bastard that is dying to sell off his favourite hunting spot to mining companies.

Also if somebody is really fixated on the equal rights stuff it could be worth pointing out that:

a) We already HAVE the Human Rights Bill, so the third section of Seymour's bill is redundant.

b) The Treaty has nothing to do with human rights! It is (in very very simplified terms) a land management document that has more in common with a lease agreement than with any declaration of human rights. If somebody truly believes in equal rights, then Maori should have the equal right to have their legal documents respected (or as canadianwheatpirates put it "a deal is a deal").

its incredibly telling about racism in aotearoa when the reasonable enlightened civilised opposition to the treaty protests are at any given time 30 seconds away from calling maori a pack of cannibal savages and trotting out decades old misinformation.

join us in the future by repeating what our dads said about maori people behind closed doors

[el-princess]

— the princess take on manifestation:

disclaimer: this is my view on manifestation and the law of attraction, i'm simply sharing my own personal opinions and thoughts that i formed from my own experiences and trials and errors.

MY HISTORY WITH THE LAW

i first discovered the law of attraction on tumblr back when i was fourteen. i remember feeling very excited thinking i found the secret to life. however i had trouble making sense of the things i was discovering, and it didn't help how it felt like every week a new concept or technique was invented. i'd send endless asks to different loa blogs but everytime i'd be told that i had limiting beliefs. i couldn't rid myself of them no matter how hard i tried, it started to feel like i just wasn't meant for manifesting. eventually i grew tired of it and abandoned the law completely. it was still at the back of my mind though, and it wasn't until a few months ago that it all clicked to me.

WHY YOU STRUGGLE WITH MANIFESTATION

when you first start to get into the law, one of the first thing you're told is to disregard logic and that keeping any sort of logical thought means upholding limiting beliefs that will in turn hinder your manifesting process. i completely disagree with that. it's hard to completely rewire your way of thinking and it's unfair to place that type of burden on yourself. i think it's proven by the fact that the same type of asks that were sent four years ago are still being sent now.

one of the most common asks that get sent are "i'm trying to manifest getting (blank) without doing anything but i'm not seeing results" and nine times out of ten the advice that is given is "just believe that you can have (blank) without the work" i think it's ineffective advice. it's easier said than done. i think it's much more effective to work with your already existing believing system than force yourself to form a new one that in the end will crumble. manifestation is built on belief.

let's use weight loss as an example. if you're trying to manifest weight loss without working out but still arent seeing results, chances are you simply don't believe you can. and that's completely okay! instead of repeating affirmations that deep down you don't believe, get up and do the most low effort possible 5 minute max long workout and affirm that it's enough for you to lose weight and get your dream body.

that way your inherit belief that to manifest something you have to take action is satisfied, and when your beliefs are satisfied and you are aligned with them, they manifest. it's simple maths. i'll remind you again that manifestation is built on belief.

work with your mind instead of against it, don't pressure yourself and don't approach manifesting in a way that feels like you are punishing yourself for who you are. do things that soothe you and your doubts. there's no such thing as limiting beliefs.

THE LAW IS PERSONAL

another thing that may be causing you to struggle with manifestation is that when you first get to know the law, you are introduced to a bunch of concepts that seem entirely made up like the 3d, the 4d, the void state, etc.. it feels like just a bunch of unnecessary things that complicate existence and life. and in a way they kinda are.

i think something we've entirely forgotten in the loa community is that the law is unique to each person. we've all been parroting the same methods and acting like they are guaranteed fixed methods and that's completely false. again, manifestation is built on belief, and everyone's beliefs are different. what might work for someone else might not work for you and that's because their beliefs aren't the same as yours. and again, that's completely okay.

if you're someone who's been trying to enter the void state but still havent succeeded, chances are deep down you don't really believe in it. and that's okay. this is not to say you think that whoever says they entered the void state is lying, not at all, you can believe in something without believing it's possible for you. the same way you can believe that something bad is possible but not for you. this is another one of the basics we've forgotten about in the loa community.

you don't have to force yourself to believe you already have your desires if deep down you don't really believe that. you don't have to be harsh on yourself. you don't have to go through mental gymnastics. it's not the only way to manifest.

the law is whatever you decide it is.

SO HOW DO I MANIFEST NOW?

forget about everything you've ever learned or read about on here, and take a moment to yourself and really dissect your mind. make a list of all your personal beliefs, yes even the ones you were told were "limiting beliefs", and don't let the pressure of somebody potentially reading it and telling you it's wrong influence you. be completely honest with yourself. when you're done with your list, make up your own law that aligns with your beliefs and practice it. the only belief you need to have is that manifestation is possible.

ENDING NOTE

i have so much more to say about manifestation but i fear we would be here for a century. i just think it's time we acknowledge the real reasons why there's still people who struggle with manifesting and acknowledge that some things that are difficult to wrap your head around arent really necessary. my point is manifestation is whatever you want it to be. please don't misunderstand me.

[barblaz-arts]

Your drawing and creativity are growing every day. I really want to read or see more of your ideas. My first impression was of the Lapidot drawing you made. (I must say, because of you, I started shipping sapphic) //back in that time I don’t even know what AO3 is // I can’t see friendship between female characters and not shipping them! Also, your points of view and explanations are very interesting to read. I think it’s because you write with consideration and critical thinking, and you don’t jump to the steam of conclusions just because most people think that way. You listen to other people’s opinions, but you still stand your ground and explain your reasoning.(I really respect you in this)

Right…I suppose to ask you something.

Have you ever watched a short on YouTube about a bird name Prince aka pRiNcEtOpHeR from Tamia(@tamiaoveres) ?

I don’t know why but Prince reminds me of Vaggie some how (I’m certain because she is a bird too)

Hypothetically, if Lucifer showed pictures of a young Charlie to Vaggie and saw how happy it made her, he might realize it would be unfair to his daughter if only her girlfriend got to enjoy seeing younger versions of her. So, using magic, he could turn Vaggie into a child, allowing Charlie to be just as happy as Vaggie. However, he didn’t stop there—he had also transform Vaggie’s mind to match her younger self!

Vaggie is one of the more well-mannered adults in the show. While she has her issues, she’s still polite to those who earn her respect. I’m not sure how common it is, but many decent adults were once chaotic and main reason why their parents had grays hair when they were young , so I imagine Vaggie might fall into this category as well.(I want her to terrorize the hotel)

Oh whoa thank you! Such kind words 🥹🥹🥹🥹 Always amazed and grateful to know when someone's followed me since the literal beginning.

That hypothetical does sound interesting. I'd like to say it'd be cute if Vaggie agreed to it, but with how kookie Lucifer can get, i can see it happening kinda sorta on accident too. I could see Vaggie maybe being a pain in the ass because she's an angel surrounded by demons and forgets they're her friends. Like, her trying to kill them in this campy, loony toon way

[sheiktothepast]

Translation (localized)! Notes & direct TL below cut

(對不起我的中文不不不好My chinese is not very good, I used a dictionary to help write this. Speaker marked with whos body they are in, not who they actually are. Action descriptors are marked with [brackets].)

???: Brave one

Vile brave one

I will curse you all

I will curse your souls

L: Ah it was a dream!

[clicks tongue]

My hair is all messed up. I couldn’t sleep well at all!

[hair falls down]

Ah?

Ah?

AH AH AH

MY HAIR

IT’S PINK

W: Stop screaming! it’s still early

L: Ah! Who are you?? Why are you wearing my handsome face?? What do you plan on doing???

H: First thing in the morning and it’s so damned noisy!! Are you idiots??

What- who are you?? You made a mistake disguising yourself as me unless you’re suicidal!

First note it’s 8 am and I have not slept at all.

Second, I’ll go down from top to bottom:

First I have no clue who that shadow thing is meant to be. If it is meant to be something/one specific

Second off, due to the nature of this comic and it being an incredibly common facet of Chinese the exclamation marker of 啊 (a) was used like crazy in this comic. It is literally an exclamation. Whenever it was used for the most part it ended up translated as an “Ah!” Since that’s a decent equivalent in English, it was also used as the “are you” in what I translated as “are you idiots??” By “Warriors” as a moreso interjection thing. I also earnestly have no clue what words are actually said by him in that part, I know he’s calling them idiots but I don’t reallyy know how so. Either he’s calling them some saying I’m unfamiliar with or he’s just calling them deficient in smarts. I think. When calling someone an idiot typically I think you’d use different characters… one mostly means stick. So I assume it’s a saying, this dictionary is lying to me, or who knows.

I could’ve translated “stop screaming” as “shut up” or “stop it”… lots of possibilities.

The very last line starts with 不是!?, meaning “not is!?” (Is not, less directly) (can also mean fault/blame, I guess) and I’m not quite sure what it means here. Also the line is funny as hell to me directly translated and I don’t know why. Are you courting death by turning yourself into a disguise of me. It’s just so formal sounding.

Anywho,

(Kinda) Direct/rough translation

???: Brave one

Vile brave one

(To) curse you (plural)

(To) curse your spirit(s)/soul(s)

L: Ah it was a dream!

[tongue click (this might be after the following line imo it doesn’t matter)]

Couldn’t sleep good (exclamation)! Hair turned completely wrong now.

[droops down]

Ah?

Ah?

AH AH AH

MY HAIR

PINK

W: Stop doing that! (? or “it’d be good if you’d stop doing that” and I doubt it but “it’s easy to stop doing that y’know”) Right now it’s still early!

L: Ah who are you! Re-wearing my handsome face? What evil intentions do you have!

H: First thing in the morning it's so damned noisy!! Do you lack smarts!! (See notes above)

(Not sure how to translate, it's literally "is not!?") who are you? By turning yourself into a disguise of me are you courting death?

[spottedenchants]

WIP Wednesday 11/27/24

Still plugging away at the first time fic and chapter 4 is coming along, so here is a fun bit from chapter 1 :3

cw: mild miscommunication, discussion of sex from a sex-averse POV

~

Even with his sticking tongue, Essek trudges through, repeats.

“I want this”-

He squeezes Caleb, comfort momentarily made man, and siphons his boundless hearth-heat.

“All of this—to be good for you.”

Caleb’s hands slip back to his back.

“This isn’t escape, Essek. It is for fun.”

Fun, yes. Inconvenient term in Common here, but Essek had dug his own grave weeks ago by botching his phrasing in the first place.

Despite his indifference presently hovering somewhere in the realm of ambivalence thinking on notions of sensitive physicality, they may as well pick apart this topic since for the moment it has Caleb stuck.

Lecture memory drones through dust: as with any partnered touch, deliberate titillation is yet another thing bodies tend to be able to do; there is no inherent significance to their actions save for that which they may create between themselves; nothing is sacred nor even special beyond that which they may deem so, if anything at all.

Then, what does this mean for them two?

After having spent so long with the world held at arm’s length, every intimacy with the Nein carries a revelatory weight to Essek. Silently sharing space whilst independently occupied—reading, writing, sketching, cooking, gardening, dining, sight-seeing, on and on—it is often perfectly satisfactory an amount of interaction, striking enough to sting his throat and prickle his eyes should he think on it too long. Resting alongside them in close quarters is similar if woven tighter, a denser ply of vulnerability: unconscious trust. But distraction indulged to an intermediary degree? So awkward and involved? He’s little metric for arousing encounters when steeped only in affection, without definitive goals or a game to steal.

But he’s already thought this through for the kissing with Caleb. Another two-body problem, perhaps Caleb’s own measure is a fair place to start here, too.

Essek presses his nose to Caleb’s neck, careful of his bruise.

“Frivolous, you think?”

“With you? Hardly.”

Oh.

Caleb’s voice gentles another degree.

“Though, I don’t mind so much. If you would care for that instead.”

So… such involvement isn’t a passing interest to Caleb, at least within this convoluted circumstance they’ve fostered thus far. Maybe it can have depth, too.

Candle in a coal mine, Essek focuses on further fleeting reflection as he’s done so well in solitude—pressure built and let, the stutter of his lungs, of heat in his ears and two pulses rocking intertwined; his own ache, accompanied- caressed, maybe even gratified—before the glare grows too bright in Caleb’s presence and snuffs itself dry.

But why? Essek rattles the concept for a futile respark. What exactly might it mean?

The lantern stays snapped shut, repulsed.

Fine. Thoughts for another time.

Regardless, that nagging notion rearing its head now, as it does- it is far broader than any sort of vague worry about concupiscent satiation; his own nose held, Essek is fairly confident he could leave Caleb an exerted mess. This present dread as he has come to know it… it is of being unfit to take care of Caleb as an entire living being. Again: a person, breathing and complete.

And it is not so much harmlessness Essek seeks, no. No, for imperfectly met souls, sharp and shorn and bound up best they can, that is impossible and he won’t delude himself otherwise despite how much he may wish it to be the case when it comes to his friends. But perhaps being of benefit is feasible. He is still trying to be kind.

They have spoken through this before. Essek can brave doing so again.

He shudders in a breath to present this jagged sliver of his heart.

“I care for you, Caleb Widogast. I would like to.”

Coasting over tender bruise and threading the last of a tremble through downsoft hair, Essek shields the back of Caleb’s neck.

“I’m unconvinced I can bear it all.”

[quibbs126]

You know, it’s sad to me that Peach Blossom basically got nothing

He was only given one short scene in the story, and he only talks to one character, that being Dark Cacao. And most of their interaction was about Peach Blossom giving him food and directions, with whatever character work being pretty much Dark Cacao centric. And how he’s left, he’s probably not relevant enough to ever bring back in another update, he’s just a guy tending to a peach bao garden

I mean sure, other playable characters have been relegated to short cameos, like Blueberry Pie, but in Blueberry Pie’s case, she already has Ovenbreak, in which I believe she did have a small story, and she has relationship charts. She has a whole other game of context, and it’s similar with Peppermint (though I never finished Mermaid’s Tale so I don’t know all his scenes), but with Peach Blossom being a CRK original, he doesn’t have that luxury

He doesn’t even have interactions with anybody right now in game, which could be changed later and they hopefully give him someone else to talk to other than Dark Cacao, but as it stands he’s got nothing other than saying a Cake Hound bit him or that the thing on his head isn’t a peach

Heck, there are NPCs who have had more characterization in stories than him. Yes one of those is Smoked Cheese, but still

It’s almost like no wonder he just gets lumped in with Affogato despite being nothing like him other than more feminine appearances and being a new femboy, that’s the most characterization some people are willing to give him because there’s not much else to work with. I mean he does have a character, or at least things you can base one off of, but you generally have to look for them in his story description or some of his in-game lines, and I think most people aren’t gonna go out of their way to do that

[piko-power]

My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)

When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.

She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.

She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.

She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.

...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.

Remember this line?

You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:

Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?

...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)

As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.

She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.

I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.

...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.

I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.

And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.

She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.

During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.

She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.

But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.

Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.

...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?

But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.

If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.

I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.

She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.

Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.

So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.

She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.

For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.

She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.

But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.

If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.

But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.

He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.

He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)

She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.

He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.

Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.

They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.

None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.

They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.

Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.

It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.

Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.

She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.

She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...

She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.

I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.

How much he loves her.

And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.

Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.

It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.

She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.

I feel like this moment here...

-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.

Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.

And it's all thanks to Sonic.

If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.

Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.

He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.

Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.

Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.

They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.

"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"

"Wouldn't dream of it."

[askoverlordvox]

"Depends on how you define my 'endeavors'." He waggles his brows and chuckles, unable to resist the little joke. "They support me in their own ways. Jenn works for me as part of my research and development team- she's got a creative mind. Plus, she's... kinder, more compassionate- she reins in my more violent or extreme impulses. Zestial, well, he's got a lot of his own stuff going on at present but he... steadies me. Challenges me to be a better man, to slow down and think, to be more exacting with my actions. He's also a great conversationalist; getting to talk to him and listen to his voice relaxes me." Vox pours more of the sake and drinks it, snagging more of the sashimi. "Alastor, on the other hand, matches me step-for-step. Pushes me to innovate, to find solutions, to keep trying- he trades barbs with me like we're boxers in a ring but he's there to kiss it and make it better at the end- don't tell him I said that. The Radio Demon has a reputation to uphold." He chuckles. "And Angel is... my safe place. We have such big public personas that we can just... drop around each other. It's hard, though. It's when we're quietest that we end up saying the most important shit, because we're still at the point where we talk around things by default."

Vox sits back in his chair as he chews on his latest bite, contemplating. "Al won't want to go near a sex club- not his scene. Jenn would probably be too embarrassed to entertain the idea. Zestial might go for curiosity's sake and Angel would probably think visiting would be a cute date night activity. Al and Jenn visit me at work all the time, though, and Zestial occasionally. Angel hasn't and that's fair- even if it's not the tower, the branding hasn't changed, and there's history there. I get that." He looks at Lilin. "While I care for them all, they're very unique people. My partners are distinctive jewels in Hell's crown. So, you might see some more than others but don't take that to mean I favor one over the other. The one thing they all share in common is that indominable spark in their souls, that tenacious fire that drives them forward, through good times and bad- I find it... irresistable."

He finishes off the bottle of sake and sets it aside, his grin sharp. "So, tell me... how often does a succubi decide to strike out on her own and directly challenge her former boss in his own area of expertise?"

Well, well, Vox… fancy running into you here.

(( @lustinlilin ))

My reputation does precede me but I’m… having a bit of trouble placing the face, my dear. You certainly look familiar.