#I should be as

[madamebaggio]

UPDATED SHIPS’ LIST!

After centuries promising this, I’ve finally updated and organized my ships’ list!

That… Was harder than I thought it’d be… lol

Anyway… I’ve decided to do it in a way that might make it easier to go around it. Let me know if it worked.

All of them will be origanized by alphabetical order, however I separated my favorite ladies from the main groups, because they do appear a lot. (A LOT)

Sansa Stark Ships

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Alfie Solommons (Peaky Blinders)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Alfie Solommons (Peaky Blinders) x Tommy Shelby (Peaky Blinders)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Arondir (The Rings of Power)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Arthur Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Booker (The Old Guard)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Borra (Maleficent: Mistress of Evil)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Bucky Barnes (MCU) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Darth Maul (Star Wars)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Derek Hale (Teen Wolf)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Draco Malfoy (Harry Potter)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Éomer (The Lord of the Rings)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Erik Lehnsherr (X-Men: First Class)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Faramir (The Lord of the Rings)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Frank Castle (The Punisher)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Galahad (King Arthur)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) X Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Jax Teller (Sons of Anarchy)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones) x Robb Stark (Game of Thrones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Lancelot/The Weeping Monk (Cursed)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Legolas (The Lord of the Rings)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Loki (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Marcus (Underworld)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Matt Murdock (Daredevil)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Merlin (Kingsman)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Nuada (Hellboy)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) X Oberyn Martell (Game of Thrones) x Willas Tyrell (Game of Thrones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Peter Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) X Prince Vlad (Dracula: Untold)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Raleigh Becket (Pacific Rim)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Ray Smith (The Gentlemen)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Roan (The 100)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x The Darkling (Shadow and Bone)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Theon Greyjoy (Game of Thrones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Thor (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Thorin Oakenshield (The Hobbit)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Thranduil (The Hobbit)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Tommy Shelby (Peaky Blinders)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Valkyrie (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Vortigern Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Willas Tyrell (Game of Thrones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Yon-Rogg (Captain Marvel)

Darcy Lewis Ships

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Arthur Curry (Aquaman)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Brock Rumlow (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Brock Rumlow (MCU) x Frank Castle (The Punisher) 

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Brock Rumlow (MCU) x Jack Rollins (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)  x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Derek Hale (Teen Wolf)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Face Templeton (The A-Team)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Frank Castle (The Punisher)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Harvey Russell (Rampage)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Jarvis (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Jensen (The losers)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x John Constantine (Constantine)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Leonard “Bones” McCoy (Star Trek)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Loki Odinson (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Mando (The Mandalorian)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Matt Murdock (Daredevil)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Niles (The Old Guard)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Phil Coulson (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Pietro Maximoff (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Ray Smith (The Gentlemen)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Seven (6 Underground)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Margaery Tyrel Ships

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Aramis (The Three Musketeers)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Boromir (The Lord of the Rings)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Bruce Wayne (Batman)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Erik (The Last Kingdom) x Galahad (King Arthur 2004)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Faramir (The Lord of the Rings)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Fíli (The Hobbit)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Galahad (King Arthur)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Gawain (King Arthur)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Genya Safin (Shadow and Bone)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Legolas

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Lucian (Underworld)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) X Roan (The 100)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Robb Stark (Game of Thrones)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Rollo Lothbrok (Vikings)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Secretary Cha (A Business Proposal)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Stelios (300)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Thranduil (The Hobbit)

Susan Pevensie Ships

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Arthur Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Clark Kent (DCU)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Éomer (The Lord of the Rings)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Erik Lehnsherr (X-Men: First Class)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Gawain (King Arthur)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Guy of Gisborne (BBC Robin Hood)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Lancelot/The Weeping Monk (Cursed)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Legolas (The Lord of Rings)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Loki Odinson (MCU)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Merlin (Kingsman)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Obi-Wan Kenobi (Star Wars)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Robb Stark (Game of Thrones)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Robin of Loxley (Robin Hood)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Kisa/Madam M Ships

(And I do know they’re two different characters but to me they kind of give the same vibes and they’re both played by the always amazing Eiza Gonzalez)

Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series) x Black Hat (Priest 2011)

Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series) x Dean Winchester (Supernatural)

Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series) x Klaus Mikaelson (The Originals)

Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series) x Lucian (Underworld)

Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series) x Lucifer (Lucifer)

Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series) x Michael (Legion)

Madam M (Hobbs & Shaw) x 47 (Hitman: Agent 47)

Madam M. (Hobbs & Shaw) x Storm Shadow (G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra)

Madame M (Hobbs & Shaw) x Jack Rollins (MCU)

Madame M (Hobbs & Shaw) x Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) x Merlin (The Kingsman)

Madame M (Hobbs & Shaw) x Merlin (The Kingsman)

Gretel Ships

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Anna Valerious (Van Helsing)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Aramis (The Three Musketeers)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Black Hat (Priest)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Borra (Maleficent: Mistress of Evil)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Chris Argent (Teen Wolf)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Darth Maul (Star Wars)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher) x Yennefer of Venberg (The Witcher)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Lan Mandragoran (The Wheel of Time)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Mr. Quinlan (The Strain)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Nina Zenik (Shadow and Bone)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) X Prince Nuada (Hellboy: The Golden Army)

Lydia Martin Ships

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) X Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) x Owen Shaw (The Fast Saga)

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf)  x Peter Hale (Teen Wolf)

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) x Prince Nuada (Hellboy)

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) x Ray Smith (The Gentlemen)

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) x Stiles Stilinski (Teen Wolf)

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) x Tangerine (Bullet Train)

Lara Croft Ships

(There are two Laras here, because they are different. So one is from the movies with Angelina Jolie and the other from the one with Alicia Vikander).

Lara Croft (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider) x Chris Argent (Teen Wolf)

Lara Croft (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider) x Deckard Owen & Owen Shaw (The Fast and the Furious)

Lara Croft (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider) x Frank Castle (The Punisher)

Lara Croft (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider) x Prince Nuada (Hellboy)

Lara Croft (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider) x Sydney Fox (Relic Hunter)

Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) X Diana Prince (Wonder Woman)

Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) x Frank Castle (The Punisher)

Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) x Lu Ren (Tomb Raider)

Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) x Mr Quinlan (The Strain)

F/M

Ada Shelby (Peaky Blinders) x Robb Stark (Game of Thrones)

Alice (Resident Evil) x Black Hat (Priest)

Alice Monaghan (Hellboy) x Ben Daimio (Hellboy)

Anne Shirley Cuthbert (Anne with an E) x Gilbert Blythe (Anne with an E)

Anne Shirley Cuthbert (Anne with an E) x Monkey D. Luffy (One Piece)

Arya Stark (Game of Thrones) x Gendry Waters (Game of Thrones)

Baby Doll (Sucker Punch) x Priest (Priest)

Bee (The Babysitter) x Castiel (Supernatural)

Bee (The Babysitter) x Michael (Legion)

Blair Waldorf (Gossip Girl) X Stiles Stilinski (Teen Wolf)

Bluebell Baggins (The Hobbit) x Thorin Oakenshield (The Hobbit)

Brienne of Tarth (Game of Thrones) x Dagonet (King Arthur)

Catia (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword) x Borra (Maleficent: Mistress of Evil)

Chelsea (St. Trinian’s) x Eggsy Unwin (Kingsman)

Claire Dearing (Jurassic World) x Harvey Russell (Rampage)

Claire Dearing (Jurassic World) x John Kennex (Almost Human)

Daisy “Quake” Johnson (Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.) X Gary “Eggsy” Unwin (Kingsman)

Debbie Ocean (Ocean’s 8) x John Wick (John Wick)

Diana (Wonder Woman) x Éomer (The Lord of the Rings)

Diana Bishop (A Discovery of Witches) x John Constantine (Constantine)

Dutch (Killjoys) x Leonard McCoy (Star Trek)

Elena Houghlin (Charlie's Angels) x Tangerine (Bullet Train)

Elena Houghlin (Charlie’s Angels) x 47 (Hitman)

Éowyn (The Lord of the Rings) x Faramir (The Lord of the Rings)

Éowyn (The Lord of the Rings) x Lancelot (King Arthur)

Éowyn (The Lord of the Rings) x The Weeping Monk (Cursed)

Evelyn Salt (Salt) x Frank Castle (The Punisher)

Felicity Smoak (Arrow) x Sam Winchester (Supernatural)

Female Tony Stark (MCU) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Gillian Owens (Practical Magic) x Dean Winchester (Supernatural)

Grace (Ready or Not) x Frank Castle (The Punisher)

Jamie Moriarty (Elementary) x Sherlock Holmes (Enola Holmes)

Jane Foster (MCU) x Jack Rollins (MCU)

Jane Sloan (The Bold Type) x Chris Argent (Teen Wolf)

Jane Sloan (The Bold Type) x James “Bucky” Barnes (MCU)

Jane Sloan (The Bold Type) x Merlin (Kingsman)

Jane Sloan (The Bold Type) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Jemma Simmons (Agents of SHIELD) x John Kennex (Almost Human)

Jessica Jones (Jessica Jones) x Matt Murdock (Daredevil)

Jinx (G.I. Joe: Retaliation) x Raizo (Ninja Assassin)

Katia Von Dees (Hitman Agent 47) x Snake Eyes (G.I. Joe)

Lady Jaye (G.I. Joe) x Darth Maul (Star Wars)

Lily Evans (Harry Potter) x James Potter (Harry Potter)

Lindy (Jolt) x Brock Rumlow (MCU)

Lindy (Jolt) x Frank Castle (The Punisher)

Lorraine Broughton (Atomic Blonde) x Frank Martin (The Transporter)

Lothíriel (The Lord of the Rings) x Éomer (The Lord of the Rings)

Lucy Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Faramir (The Lord of the Rings)

Madison Maxwell (Dollface) x Chris Argent (Teen Wolf)

Maiko Mori (Pacific Rim) x Joseph Dredd (Dredd)

Maleficent (Maleficent) X Jareth (The Labyrinth)

Maria Hill (MCU) x Merlin (Kingsman)

Mera (DCU) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Mercedes (Snakes on a plane) x Chen Leong (Snakes on a plane)

Mika Coretti (Ninja Assassin) x Raizo (Ninja Assassin)

Miriam “Midge” Maisel (The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel) x Napoleon Solo (The Man From U.N.C.L.E.)

Morgana (Merlin) x Captain James Hook (Peter Pan)

Natasha Romanoff (MCU) X John Wick (John Wick)

Nina Zenik (Shadow and Bone) x Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher)

Nina Zenik (Shadow and Bone) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Octavia Blake (The 100) x Darth Maul (Star Wars)

Octavia Blake (The 100) x Joseph Dredd (Dredd)

Padmé Amidala (Star Wars) x Obi-Wan Kenobi (Star Wars)

Pepper Potts (MCU) x Phil Coulson (MCU)

Phryne Fisher (Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries) x Tommy Shelby (Peaky Blinders)

Princess Tamina (Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time) x Éomer (The Lord of the Rings)

Princess Tamina (Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time) x Prince Nuada Silverlance (Hellboy: The Golden Army)

Queen Freya (The Huntsman: Winter’s Wars) x Conan (Conan The Barbarian)

Ravenna (Snow White and the Huntsman) x Vortigern Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword)

Rey (Star Wars) x James T. Kirk (Star Trek)

Sam (Gunpowder Milkshake) x Tangerine (Bullet Train)

Samantha O'Hara (Rogue) x William 'Ironhead' Miller (Triple Frontier)

Sarah Wilson (The Falcon and The Winter Soldier) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Selina Kyle (Catwoman) x Matt Murdock (Daredevil)

Shana 'Scarlett' O’Hara (G.I. Joe) x John Grimm (Doom)

Shana ‘Scarlett’ O’Hara (G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra) x Darth Maul (Star Wars)

Shana ‘Scarlett’ O’Hara (G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra) x 47 (Hitman: Agent 47)

Tamara (Conan the Barbarian 2011) x The Font Demon (The New Adventures of Monkey)

Tamara (Conan The Barbarian) x Lucian (Underworld)

Tauriel (The Hobbit) x Kíli (The Hobbit)

The Mage (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword) x Tristan (King Arthur)

Wynonna Earp (Wynonna Earp) x Dean Winchester (Supernatural)

Xu Xialing (MCU) x Razor Fist (MCU)

Yennefer of Vengerberg (The Witcher) x Diaval (Maleficent)

Yennefer of Vengerberg (The Witcher) x The Font Demon (The New Adventures of Monkey)

M/M Ships

Arthur Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword) x Robb Stark (Game of Thrones)

Bilbo Baggins (The Hobbit) x Thorin Oakenshield (The Hobbit)

Bran Stark (Game of Thrones) x Edmund Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia)

Bucky Barnes (MCU) x Ray Smith (The Gentlemen)

Bucky Barnes (MCU) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Face (The A-Team) x Han Cho Bai (Red 2)

Faramir (The Lord of the Rings) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Jacob Hood (Eleventh Hour) X Santiago “Pope” Garcia (Triple Frontier)

Jaskier (The Witcher) x Jesper Fahey (Shadow and Bone)

Loki Odinson (MCU) x Thranduil (The Hobbit)

F/F Ships

Aurora (Maleficent) x The Princess (The Princess)

Beverly Marsh (It) x Eleven | Jane Hopper (Stranger Things)

Clarke Griffin (The 100) x Daenerys Targaryen (Game of Thrones)

Daenerys Targeryen (Game of Thrones) x Yara Greyjoy (Game of Thrones)

Daenerys Targeryen (Game of Thrones) x Yennefer of Venberg (The Witcher)

Daphne Kluger (Ocean’s Eight) x Sabina Wilson (Charlie’s Angels)

Dinah Lance (Birds of Prey) x Sabina Wilson (Charlie’s Angels)

Elizabeth Bennet (Pride and Prejudice) x Kate Sharma (Bridgerton)

Hattie Shaw (Hobbs & Shaw) x Jane Kano (Charlie’s Angels)

Jaylah (Star Trek Beyond) x Valkyrie (MCU)

Jess (Focus) x Nine Ball (Ocean’s 8)

Kate Kane (Batwoman) x Rosa Diaz (Brooklyn 99)

Lady Sif (MCU) x Sara (The Huntsman)

Lou (Ocean’s 8) x Scarlet (Milkshake Gunpowder)

Mace Browne (The 355) x Maria Schmidt (The 355)

Mina Harker (The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen) x Selene (Underworld)

Morgana (Merlin) x Ravenna (Snow White and the Huntsman)

Tauriel (The Hobbit) x Valkyrie (MCU)

OT3

Anna Poliatova (Anna) x Murphy and Connor MacManus (The Boondock Saints)

Bluebell Baggins x Thorin Oakenshield x Dwalin (The Hobbit)

Gillian Owens (Practical Magic) x Murphy and Connor MacManus (The Boondock Saints)

Melissa MacCall (Teen Wolf) x Chris Argent (Teen Wolf) x Peter Hale (Teen Wolf)

Mikaela Banes (Transformers) x Han (The Fast & The Furious) x Raleigh Becket (Pacific Rim)

Parker x Alec Hardison x Eliot Spencer (Leverage)

Roxy Morton (Kingsman) x Leo Fitz and Jemma Simmons (Agents of the S.H.I.E.L.D.)

Shana 'Scarlett' O'Hara (G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra) x Dorian x John Kennex (Almost Human)

Well, this was… Kind of ridiculous.

I think I need more ships. lol

[bizarrebazaar13]

what if your doppelgänger wasn’t evil it was just a person. what if your doppelgänger wasn’t trying to replace you it was just trying to learn to be a person and you were the best model it had. what if your doppelgänger looked at you with your eyes and said with your voice that it just wanted to be loved. what then.

[yeepof]

I understand that tall men are our POV characters, but surely being like a foot taller than everyone around them would have some occasional consequences

[vamptits]

filtering down ao3 results from 14000 to 6 based on a single tag is foul. im sorry none of you are as enlightened as me ig.

[sparklebyte]

“here’s what we know about the uhc shooter”

WRONG! He is a suspect and we should treat him as such. He should be treated as innocent until proven guilty, not guilty until proven innocent. He’s a person of interest not the killer. I don’t care what the media or authorities are saying, he’s a human being who deserves a fair trial and deserves to be treated as innocent until proven otherwise.

[daisyofwaterdeep]

had a dream I went to a hozier concert and mr. hozier stopped singing and pointed to me in the crowd and asked me to go get him some extra crispy tofu and a blueberry shake for after the show and then the crowd passed his debit card to me and when I got it I could see his real legal name was Horace Bob-omb

[w1lmuttart]

The lake town

[kazz-brekker]

in dracula there is a cowboy and the female lead lives. in nosferatu there is no cowboy and the female lead dies. ergo, the existence of a cowboy is highly important for the survival of the female lead in a gothic vampire story.

[sapphicscience]

idk thinking about how sometimes you have to show up for people you aren't that close to, because sometimes you're just the person who's there. sometimes you invite a new friend to a party and end up having to sit with them through a panic attack. sometimes you run into an acquaintance on their worst day and they need to talk about what happened. sometimes someone is crying in a stairwell and you're the only one around to ask if they're okay. and none of this is "trauma dumping" or whatever the fuck it's just being there for people because you're the one in the room with them.

[gayvampyr]

asking people to be mindful of others when sharing a communal space (especially one you cannot just up and leave from) is not selfish or misanthropic. come on now

[copepods]

crazy how 4 hours of work will literally take up my entire 15+ hour day. who allowed this

[shadesofmauve]

I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.

Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.

He was really nice.

Yeah.

It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?

You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."

You didn't, loves, you didn't.

We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.

I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.

Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.

When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"

No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.

Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?

Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.

That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.

I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.

A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.

I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.

So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!

Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.

You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.

I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.

I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.

It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.

Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.

[stardial]

missing someone is crazy because you’ll have dreams that r like “we went on a nice walk together :)” and you’ll wake up feeling like you’re gonna throw up

[vietsoul]

Josh Duckworth | Onlyfans, 2024

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