#I remember the nights we would come back to the apartment late because we’d always go somewhere and I remember hearing the crickets

[collideliketwostars]

and all of a sudden I’m remembering the nights I played outside of the apartment in San Diego

[fictive-culture]

Hi it’s the Pokémon fictive I’m back again hi hello

I just got hit with a huge wave of missing my home so excuse me while I talk.

My mom (the one who didn’t try to kill me, aka Amber) was/is a Wooloo/Dubwool specialist. We lived together for many years. She found me in Kalos, trapped inside a cave after who knows how many years. She took me home, helped me recovered, and I never left emotionally her side after that. Even when I was traveling the world p, the feeling of always having someone to come home to was very nice, and not like anything if ever felt in years. I was native to Kalos for the most part. Born there after being created, lived there for millennia outside of traveling and such. The kingdoms of Kalos were established, I had been in the atmosphere, sort of in a hibernating state. Unbeknownst to me, gravity had finally pulled me in. Crashing into the courtyard of the castle. The first one who found me was their princess. I can’t overstate our bond that we shared after that. It was like we were siblings, never taking a moment apart from each other. I seriously don’t even remember leaving Kalos during that time. She’d eventually even became Queen, we were together into her late ages. But of course, as all Kingdoms do, ours fell. I ended up retreating into the wilds, invisible to all. The Queen’s daughter had also been quite… not good for a lack of better word. I ended up feeling the need to leave the Queen’s side for the first time since we’d met all those years ago because of her. I don’t think I ever was the Queen again. I never even got to say a proper goodbye to her. I miss her. And for years I would never feel that kind of deep connection to anybody ever again. But Amber was different. She loved me. She didn’t care I was some weird god pretending to be a human child. She’d loved me all the same. As her own. I miss her so much. We have her in the system but we haven’t spoken in a while. I hope she’s doing okay. Anyways. We lived in Kalos together for awhile until she eventually got a place, a house lab with a large pasture, to work and live at in Galar. I moved with her, to her shocking surprise. I really don’t understand if she didn’t think i’d come with her. She was really just my mother. She had already been taking many Woolf specimens back in our home in Kalos, but now she could own all of them and have them live happily, grazing in the pasture fields. She did have a pet Wooloo even before she found me. Frills. WHO eventually did evolve into a Dubwool back in Galar.

Now to I don’t think anyone’s surprise, I was not emotionally stable, and I still am not. Frills helped me through many mental breakdowns and panic attacks. I think you can imagine having somebody searching every corner of the earth to hunt and kill you is not a pleasant thought. Frills, and my Sylveon, spots. I honestly cannot remember when I caught her. Though it was as an Eevee. I named her after her spotted and splotchy fur. They helped me more than i can express. Countless sleepless nights staring out the window in my room, cold air flowing in, trying my hardest not to just leave and burrow myself into the millions of layers of the earth to sleep forever.

I really don’t like the cold all that much. At least when I can’t manage it. Gotta tell you, being crucified on top of Mt. Lanakila in an attempt to be killed and end the world really fucks you up. Thanks, Lyra. /s

I still love Lyra. At least, in recent times. She came into the system awhile back, she was there when Amber went dormant for the first time. I didn’t know that dormancy could be temporary, so I’d really thought I’d lost my mother forever, for the second time. She helped me through it, helped me sleep. Helped me get through the days afterwards. We called a truce. Though it really wasn’t necessary on her part, as she ended coming from a world where she’d stopped trying to hunt me down after Mt. Lanakila.

It’s really a shame she had to do it on that mountain. I loved Alola, but after that I really couldn’t go back to that place. Atleast not on that island. Also, fuck Violet. Not the game. Lyra’s main assistant. I fucking hate her I hate her so much she’s the fucking worst I hate her so much. She was the worst. Worse than Lyra. So much worse. At least after a while in the timelines where Lyra kept trying to hunt me down she eventually stopped trying to taunt or tease me when she’d be about to try and kill or capture me again. But not Violet. She never stopped. I couldn’t do anything about it. I hated her so much and I still do. I don’t think i’d ever be able to forgive her.

I still want to go home. I want my body back I want my powers back I want my immortality back I want my mother again I want my Pokémon again I want my Spots I want my Frills I want my Sligoo. I want my paws I want my ears I want my fangs I want my fur. I had a necklace that reminded me of the one I had at home but I lost the pendant and i want it back. It made me feel happy. I want to see my sister again. Thorn, if you see this later, I want to talk to you more :( I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.

-🎀🐾 (sorry if this isn’t the emoji tag I used last time, I keep fluctuating between not using the paws and using them.)

Sorry this got so ventish. If you don’t want to post this that’s fine.

Hi! I'm really sorry it took so long for us to post this but we like to read everything before posting and it took us awhile to read this please don't feel bad about that and feel free to send in more stuff like this :) It's what the rambles are for sharing your story and feelings I do hope that you get to see your family again and speak to them more often and just in general I hope that life is kind to you :)

[downwiththefuckingship]

always

i’m always afraid of ruining things

by saying them

out loud or in my head

the dock is falling apart

but we are waiting for a ship

that promised to come home

it’s a revival but no one knows

what we’re bringing back

we’re on our last leg

we’re closing up shop forever

we’re throwing the baby out

with the bath water

the last petal always lands on

loves me not

by definition of uninterrupted time

or no matter what

the other word for forever

you could say the bridge is always

coming apart when i’m on it

or that i step in front of bullets

that were never meant for me

that someone’s always pulling the ladder up

behind them when i’ve agreed to go last

i used to think it must be beautiful

to be naive

of the damage you cause

i’m always holding my phone

at weird angles

trying to shazam the wind

or river rushing by

the way grief always comes

crawling back inside

the way you’re always indiscriminately

angry with me

for this things i do or am about to

things i did in dreams and in a vacuum

always unringing the church bells

and jumping the gun

we’re always spitting in our hands

to make a deal

or make amends

you’re always on my mind when i blow out

birthday candles and when i consider

the currency of love

i’m always praying in the church

of missing you

the lights on the dash lit up like christmas

tiny microcosms without the festivities

always checking your eyes

for signs of life

always talking during my favorite part

of the movie

a day late and a dollar short

always losing it in the parking lot

when the music comes back on

always dragging the bedroom for bodies

the way i thought you’d always be there

why i always draw the nine of swords

asking my father why he always

let the fish go

the time machine always turning back

into a pumpkin

do we cry when we couldn’t hold on?

or because we always knew

we’d never be able to

why you always gotta make it about us?

it’s always sunny where you are

i’m always on my way but never there

something else always

glittering in the distance

when i want your attention

i always feel like the band on the titanic

i’m singing my letters love always

i’m signing off forever

thank you for always coming through

with a machete

when the wound is almost healed

to make sure it’s mortal

i was always under the impression

you’d give up on me

i remember you saying

“you are always welcome here” & “the door is

always open”

and then never speaking to me again

the shore always just out of reach

i always want to leave you voicemails

wondering what’s real

mommy fortuna always able

to spot the difference

there will be tears

there will always be tears

why are you always saying that to me

why are you always telling me

not to get hysterical

you told me to grow a set of eyes

in the back of my head

i never was able to bring that to fruition

they grew in ways that made me see

the way she speaks in i told you so’s

how she always avoids asking me

how i’ve been

we’re always taking turns

blaming each other

i thought you wanted life like a rocky movie

i’m always fighting the final boss

always talking about things

in the past tense

always wondered what that would look like

under an x ray

always disassociating in public

rubbing table lamps in target

under the halogen bulbs

rubbing my hands raw

on every teapot in the antique store

that reminds me of aladdin

i always thought urza

breaking into phyrexia to steal xantcha’s heart

was the perfect love story

when we pry your chest open

with the jaws of life to reveal

the same purple black explosion

as when i jam my eyes closed

on nights i open up like a crater

always running from the fight

when the knives come out

running your finger along the bleached bone

of my jaw just before removing my teeth

we cook from the same pantry

but the meal made with love

tastes different

the mechanic under the hood always

saying “see there’s your problem”

taking a hammer to the magic 8 ball

after everything shakes out

i always get the feeling you’re through with me

that my usefulness is almost dried up

always pretending not to notice

when i’m inconsolable

but says she’s an empath

the crossword puzzzle

always wants to know the french word

for drowning

we’re dropping like flies

because we don’t talk about

the things that kill us

can i tell you a secret

life is full of hard pills to swallow

i’m always taking my medicine

always wanted to be buried

on the spot where i heard you say it

i always wanted to write a poem about

the never ending story

that made you feel like you

were in the mud pulling too

the end is always your favorite part

have you read the paper this morning?

the mood ring always black

you’re always making that face

when i decide to breathe

or when i take the lions share

of the suffering

i’m always telling jenny

that i know what love is

i’m always mistaken

i thought i saw the yellow portals

opening in my peripheral

i thought i heard you say

on your left

#nationalpoetrymonth #poetry #poetrycommunity #mypoetry #poetrychallenge #napowrimo #poetryloving #slampoetry #poetrylover #poetryoftheday #poetrycorner #poetryclub #streetpoetry #darkpoetry #poetryaddict #dailypoetry #poetrybooks #poetrylife #2023vb3030 #nationalpoetrymonth2023 #miseducation

[onlypaintedsmiles]

I want it all back…

All of our inside jokes with each other.

Calling you after work every single day just to talk about everything that happened while you ate or played a video game.

When I had mono and you came over with food and sat with me while I cried in pain.

Me coming over for new years even though I worked at 6am the next day, because you always wanted a new year’s kiss and wanted me to be your first.

Cuddling in bed at your mom’s apartment all morning until we got up to get breakfast across the street.

How even though I had to force you to go to parties, social events, work things, you still had a good time because we were together before, during, and after.

The first time I came over to your brother’s, your dad’s, and your mom’s places and you showed me around.

Watching every scary movie or short film imaginable. And sometimes not watching it at all.

When I took you to the part late at night and we made out in the field.

Carpooling to our friend’s house every single time we hung out with her and all the talks in the car.

The flowers you would buy me.

Cuddling with you and especially laying with my head in your lap while you played video games. Kissing you in between games.

Going downtown to restaurants for drinks and cheese curds and even the simple moments like trying to find parking and walking there.

Nights spent really getting to know each other and falling in love till 4am when you were living at your brother’s.

Going to the zoo, state fair, and cheese curd fest with each other.

The personalized gifts we’d gift each other like the ring with our initials and the sweatshirt I stitched a heart into the sleeve.

How you’d remember what time my alarm was set or when I’d go to sleep and wouldn’t text me because you knew it’d wake me. But you would snap me messages and drunk snap me too.

Surprising each other with small gifts in the car for us to see after work when we had a bad day. Or me just buying you small things that made me think of you.

Holding my hand in the car or putting your hand on my leg when we drove anywhere.

When you googled how to tell your best friend you have a crush on her.

All the outfits I would put together for our date nights so that you would think your girlfriend is hot.

Taking every single break together. Waiting for each other before we left work. Hanging out every day off or night off we had from work together. Even hanging out after a night shift, even if it was for just a few hours.

Going to your family’s dinners or hanging out with your mom and you bragging about how much your mom likes me afterwards.

Going to pick n save to buy snacks to eat together and cuddle.

When I’d tease you by sending you pictures of myself after hanging out.

The marks we would leave on each other.

Buying you small gifts whenever something reminded me of you.

The nights where either one of us really just needed to cry to the other and be held by one another.

One of the first nights we hung out alone and the power went out and we watched a movie on your phone and laid together real close.

Wearing your flannels and sweatshirts whenever I was cold or needed something to take home and cuddle when you weren’t around.

How we used to memorize each other’s work schedules.

Watching movies in the parking lot of Culver’s.

The good morning and good night texts.

Not being able to keep our hands off of each other whenever we were together whether it be when we were hanging out or even just driving.

When we would get stupid drunk together and I poured candle wax on your floor on accident.

Falling asleep talking to you on the phone just because or when I had a bad day and wanted to fall asleep to your voice.

The texts we’d send each other about wishing we were cuddling instead.

The time you first said I love you and it was during one of our hour long goodbyes where we were just hugging and talking by my car under the street lights.

All of our favorite places to get food or hang out at. Thinking of “our” places now just haunt my every thought.

Every moment where we had to say goodbye at night and it felt so horrible to leave you and I never wanted to stop kissing you.

The tone in your voice when you would fucking call me pretty…..

I miss you so fucking much.

I miss you as my girlfriend. And I miss you as my best friend. I miss how comfortable I was when I was with you. I just wish you wanted me in your life the same way as you used to. I wish we could pick up where these memories left off. It would be so easy for me to do that with you. I know there’s so much more I could write and there’s a lot more that I left out. There’s the even more personal memories that I won’t write but I’ll always remember. And I know putting them out there is a lot. But you’re the only one who will know and understand where I’m coming from because you were there.… these memories and so many fucking more meant so much to me and it kills me it doesn’t linger in your thoughts like it does mine. I hate how I’m just the past to you. I don’t want that to be it. It can’t be it….

[writtenbygen]

Why not

I’ve spent a lot of time and energy on all the reasons “why” he was perfect for me and why we should be together. So for in the future, when I inevitably idealize him again and feel like I should’ve given him more of a chance and maybe we’d be together, here are the reasons why we’re not.

I’ve been sure of him for almost a year. At which point he was fairly in and out. He knew he was a major confidant of mine, yet would often leave texts unanswered and cancel plans without rescheduling. I get it, he doesn’t feel well. But then when I stopped reaching out, going the entire summer without seeing each other and barely speaking at all. Never once checks in on me when I had confided all the problems I was having in the spring. 

Then he miraculously reappears in the fall. Doing a little better. He wants to see me. Then he wants to see me more regularly. He says “yes” to plans and we’re regularly part of each other’s lives. It gets to the point where I can expect to hear from him pretty often. Where he knows what’s going on in my life and I know what’s going on in his. I know he has doctor appointments on Tuesdays and therapy on Thursdays. He texts me to check in at 3pm on the dot when he knows that’s the time my stressful dentist appointment would be over. It starts to feel like a little more than friends. 

Then he drops off again.

Then I have a horrible tragedy—the death of one of the most important people in my life. I call him. Because everything feels so wrong. And I know when I’m with him, I feel like everything is a little more right. He’s there for me. He tells me to come over right away. That first night, I fell apart, and as horrible as it felt to be falling apart, it felt so right that it was his arms that I fell into. I felt safe and loved and at home. I said to him that I wished I could stop existing temporarily and he said “please don’t. I kinda like you.” He put his arm around me and he held me to his chest and I listened to his heartbeat. I told him I never wanted to move and he said I didn’t have to. We sat like that on more than one occasion, 3 separate days.

It was more than a friendship.

Over the coming weeks, he and that old couch in his basement and the little orange flicker of the fake candle underneath the lamp, became my safe place. That grounded me. Daily texts, checking in on me, reminding me he was there. He’s there for me in exactly every way I need him to be. He reaches out, responds, sees me whenever I need him. Comforts me, holds me, lets me cry, distracts me, includes me with his family and friends. He is perfect. He is the supportive partner I’ve always dreamed of. It feels like things are happening. 

Whenever I was feeling lost and alone and overwhelmed by my life, I remembered him. I could text him and he’d always respond. I could invite myself over and be there soon back in his comfort. And even when I couldn’t right away, I could think about it. Just the thought that he was there supporting me, cheering me on, and the thought that I’d see him soon, that he’d be there for me, was enough to get me through the worst days of my life.

He invited me to spend Christmas Day with his family. He invited me to New Year’s Eve with his friends. It felt like things were really “happening.” It definitely felt like more than friends. His mom said she thinks of me as part of the family. The New Year’s “party” was just his close guy friends from high school, and me. It felt like I was his plus-one. This was more than a friendship.

Then he dropped off again.

Daily texting turns into maybe a text or 2 every day or 2. It gets less and less frequent. Less and less interesting. When I ask how he is, I get vague answers. He claims he’s more absent because of his own issues. Maybe that’s true. He says he doesn’t want to talk and isn’t up to talking lately. Yet, he is also extremely hurt and offended that his stupid ex girlfriend won’t make time to talk to him. He wants to talk to HER. But not me. Not me, who he knows is counting on him. Not me, who he knows loves him and is there for him.

I don’t know if he’s spooked because he felt like things were happening with us. I don’t know if he doesn’t feel the same way or is just overwhelmed or is just hung up on his ex. I don’t know if it all really IS just because he’s sick and depressed. And honestly? It doesn’t even matter. I’m sick of not being a priority. I’m sick of him always coming first to me, and me only coming first to him when it’s convenient for him. He’s unreliable and inconsistent. He’s there only when he wants to be. He doesn’t communicate. He shuts me out. He pines for someone who couldn’t care less about him, and shuts me out when I clearly care so much for him.

This is a big case of: if he wanted to, he would. I don’t need to tell him how I feel about him. I can’t, even, because I haven’t seen him. I can’t see him, because he doesn’t want to see me. For almost a month now. But he knows how I feel. I’ve made it very, very obvious, and he’s LITERALLY a rocket scientist. He’s not stupid. He’s always been more observant and less oblivious than he acts. I’ve gotten my answer. No response is a response. I am done putting my life on hold for him. I deserve better than the scraps he throws at me.

In the wake of this, I feel absolutely wrecked by him. In the horribleness of the last couple months, he has been the straw that broke me. I feel absolutely shattered, heartbroken, and abandoned by him. Even though nothing ever “happened,” he can’t possibly have been so thick to not see at the very least that he was extremely important to me and was a huge reason why I wasn’t falling apart (in addition to it just being plain obvious, I actually told him this). He was there for me at my lowest and then gradually phased me out. What, as if I wouldn’t notice? The worst part is, I wasn’t even surprised. He got progressively more and more distant, like he always does. I thought this time would be different. Maybe it was. But he’s still him, and I half-expected that from the start. He’s not going to change. And this is what I’m going to get from him. I’m never going to come first to him. He’s never going to be open and communicate with me. He’s never going to be real with me. It’s always going to be one-sided. I’m just going to pathetically pine for him like he pines for his ex.

I cannot be broken by him one more time. I deserve better than to keep giving him chances thinking that it may turn out differently. I’m not going to give him the opportunity to crush me again.

I can now officially say, I saw this “relationship” through. I gave it a chance. It won’t work out. I see that it won’t work out. These are the reasons why. The reasons why I deserve better than him. There are so many things I love about him, but he makes it impossible and painful to love him. He would be perfect as a hypothetical. But he’s not hypothetical. He’s real, and he’s flawed, and he’s broken me time and time again. Whether or not it’s deliberate or malicious, he has. He’s not horrible, he’s not the worst person ever, but he’s also not as great as I’ve made him out to be in my head. When I put it this way, when I see who he really is and what he’s really done and take off the rose-colored glasses, I can finally see that. I’ve given him way too much power over me and my life. I need to break the cycle. I need to stop giving him chances to hurt me. Things are bad enough right now. The last thing I need is to feel crushed and gutted by my “friend.”

But love isn’t rational. Love doesn’t make any sense at all. Love is why, in spite of all the reasons why not, I still want him. I still love him.

[journalgirlsworld]

TW//: Mentions of Death, SA and, ED’s

I think the first time I wanted to die was sixth grade. Maybe around Christmas when reality hit. My grandpa died the 16th two days before my 12th birthday and 10 days before Christmas. My mom was stressed about losing our apartment. We lived in section 8 housing where they did inspections, it wasn’t always the cleanest. She was stressed and I remember her yelling at us. Me and my sisters that if we didn’t help we’d end up homeless. “Do you want to live in box on the street?” She yelled. We went to bed with our older tucking us in as I asked “are we gonna be homeless?” She proceeded to do what any good sister would do and told us no and that everything would be fine. I remember thinking as I laid in bed that it’d of been easier for her if I was never born and that I wish I was dead. About to an few weeks later was my grandpas service. I didn’t know how to feel, we weren’t close and I didn’t even really know the guy. He took me out every once in an while to eat and was nice to me. I remember hearing my mother cry and feeling her pain surge through me as I leaned on her shoulder and cried. I hate crying in front of others so I stepped to the side. Tears rolling down my 12 year old cheeks as I look out on other tombstones wondering why he’d passed and why I was crying cause I barely knew the guy. Sensing someone staring I look over to see an cousin looking. I don’t know him much at all. So I wipe my tears angrily and leave to comfort my mother hiding behind her. I realized that I couldn’t die because she’d cry like that for me. No matter how many times she’s yelled at me, beat me or I’ve been angry at her. There’d always be even if it was an small, an part of her that loved me and would cry out over my body. So I carried on, burdened by pain.

The second time I was truly ready to end it all was 8th grade. I can’t remember much but I’m assuming it’d been an particularly rough day. It was night, I thought she’d been sleeping. So I laid on my bed in our shared room crying. Shuttering as snot rolled down my nose, drooling with my mouth gaped open breathing in air as my body racked with cries. Cries of pain and guilt. Guilty because I thought I was to blame. The one to blame for an fellow classmate taking my innocent. Preying on my naivety. Guilting me and threatening to tell my mother that I’d been playing with glass and an lighter. I didn’t want to get in trouble right? Hear her say she was mad or disappointed? Beat me in one of her stress induced rages? So I said okay because I thought what we where gonna do was okay and normal. It wasn’t. It was horrible, i felt bad after. And I didn’t even know why. And then due to being sooooo uneducated by the American school system when I finally realized it was too late. I’d just been raped at 7. Joining the other what I assumed to be 99% of young girls and women that are assaulted before or at 7. I was another #metoo. And you know who I was blaming? Myself! Because I didn’t understand that I was the victim. So when she suddenly asked me “what was wrong?” in that dark room at night. I simply said “nothing.” Because I thought I was to blame and I didn’t want her to be disappointed in me.

The latest time was during my sophomore year, I had an eating disorder, my school had just allowed students to come back to school with masks. My anxiety and social anxiety had grown, I didn’t know how to interact and I couldn’t do it. I was still getting yelled at, at home and I had no friends. So I begged and pleaded my mother before she finally allowed me to go online. She was ether gone most of the day allowing me to rot in bed slowly. My depression over taking me. My little corner in our shared bedroom cluttered with trash, my body unwashed for days, my curly hair matted and my stomach growling as I starved myself. I don’t blame her at all. She had my younger siblings to take care of. I didn’t need to take away from them especially during that time when money was oh so tight. So I kept quiet. I showed up to work everyday with an smile pretending I didn’t want to open that top kitchen drawer and slit my wrist. Smiling and cracking jokes before allowing my face to drop moments later. But my mom needed me so I kept going.

And now I’m still here, it hasn’t gotten that much better but I’m gonna start trying to get better. To have better and to feel better. To anyone struggling like I am now. It will get better but you’ve got to make the decision to make it better. It won’t happen magically from manifesting or shit like that. You’ve got to make it happen and everything will fall into place.

[scarlettriot]

Stood Up

Pairing: Sero/F!Reader

Summary: When you find your dating making out with someone else at a Halloween party, Hanta swoops in and reclaims your evening, rekindling an old flame.

Contains: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Demisexual Reader, Astronomy/Greek Lore Nerd Sero, Old flame

Warnings: 18+ Below the cut, Minors DNI! Swearing, Demi Problems, Praise/Smidge of Degradation, Name-calling (slut & whore), Pet names (Love, good girl, pretty girl), Car Sex, F Masturbation, Oral M Receiving (Road Head) I think that's everything

A/N: This took me much longer than I expected. It's also my first time writing Sero. Given the season, I decided to add a touch of Halloween and costumes to this one.

If you'd like to read other's in the Stood Up series, here are the links:

Stood Up - Bakugo - WC 3,502

Stood Up - Kirishima - WC 3,612

Stood Up - Kaminari - WC 2,461

Word Count Starting Below: 3,494

Denki Kaminari's annual Halloween bash was in full swing by the time Hanta had arrived. He'd come straight from patrol, wrapping himself up in his own tape making a half assed mummy costume for himself. Not like anyone would notice with the flashing colored lights, loud music, and abundance of liquor.

However, Hanta didn't even make it up to the double glass front doors of Denki's home. Not before doing a double take at the very familiar pirate that ran by him.

"Y/N?" You stopped allowing him the chance to catch up to you, "Holy shit, it is you, when the hell did you get back?"

Three years you'd been gone, working in America. Time differences and busy schedules made it so the two of you barely kept in touch. It was a shame, Hanta thought, considering how close the two of you used to be.

"I- uh- just a few weeks now. I heard you were helping out with the disaster relief after that storm."

It had to be his eyes playing tricks on him, the funny colors of the dancing lights were what made your cheeks look wet, right? Those couldn't have been tears.

"I was, yeah, but I got back yesterday. I didn't know-"

"Get the hell outta here!" His head snapped back towards the front of the house, just in time to see Eijiro, dressed in an impressive werewolf costume, literally throw someone out of the party. The guy drunkenly stumbled off, Eijiro walking over towards where Hanta was standing with you. "Y/N, you good?"

You nodded while Hanta tried to piece together what'd happened. "Sorry, it took me a second to find the bastard. Do ya wanna come back in? I'll make sure he leaves."

"No, Eijiro, thanks though. I'm just gonna head home."

The wolfman frowned but understood. "We'll have a smaller party for ya! Just the gang as a welcome home! You know Denki will look for any excuse to throw a party." He turned his gaze on Hanta. "A mummy, really?"

"You've been a damn werewolf for the last two years! You don't get to give me crap."

Eijiro poked the fuzzy pointed red ears carefully set into his spiky hair. "Mina and I worked real hard on this costume... seemed like a waste to only wear it once."

"We both know you haven't just worn those once, big man."

That got a chuckle out of you while all Eijiro could do was shrug and try to hide a shit-eating grin.

He asked you again if you'd like to stay and once more you said you were going to just head home. It was when you specifically said you were going to be walking home that Hanta spoke up offering to drive you back to your home since it was Halloween and people were creeps.

You were a damn pro hero but he still didn't feel right about just letting you walk home alone.

When you agreed he told Eijiro he'd be back soon and walked over with you to his car.

>>><<<

A part of you missed the old station wagon Hanta used to drive, not that this BMW he now drove wasn't absolutely amazing, you just sort of missed the comfort of the old car.

He waited until he'd reached the end of Denki's long, winding driveway to finally speak. "So, you wanna tell me what happened back there, or am I just supposed to pretend like Kiri didn't kick someone out on your behalf?"

"You could probably just ask Kiri and he'd tell you."

"I could, but, I'd like to hear it from you."

You knew you could tell him, there was nothing you couldn't tell Hanta. There was once a time when the man knew every single detail about your life. Sure, time and distance had put a strain on that relationship but you were back now. There was no reason why you couldn't at least start rebuilding what you and Hanta once had.

"Y/N, if you don't wanna say anything-"

"I was just casually seeing this guy. You know me and dating, how we don't always work out." You said abruptly and he quit talking, "And so, we weren't like official but we said we'd go to this party together. Well, I got here and went looking for him and found him making out with one of Hawks' sidekicks. I got a little upset when he noticed me and, well, he just said he found someone better."

Hanta actually stopped the car, pulled off to the side of the road, threw it in park, and looked right at you because he knew what found someone better meant exactly. You'd used those words in high school when that guy from Shiketsu that you'd been seeing got pissed off that you wouldn't put out and ended it with you. You went to his dorm crying because he 'found someone better', is what you told him. It took him a few hours to get the truth out of you.

You'd always been the kind of person to love with your entire heart but sexually, you'd confessed that you felt different from all the other kids your age back then. Not having the same urges and desires that everyone else seemed stricken with.

"Hanta, it's fine, really. Kiri heard the whole thing and, well, you saw what happened."

"Doesn't make it right! So, you went on a couple dates with a guy, that doesn't mean he just gets to expect you to put out for him! Even if you weren't demi, no one gets to just assume they deserve sex."

His lips were pressed in a narrow line, nostrils flared once in annoyance. He was usually so calm and laid back that you thought it rather cute when he got overprotective. "It's alright, Hants, really."

He still gave you a look that said he disagreed but then shook his head, dropping the subject for now at least.

"Still like those late-night drives?"

"I love them."

"Good."

Hanta waited for a car to pass and whipped the car in the other direction.

It wasn't long before he had the windows rolled down, conversations filling in the blanks of lost time, in between belting out choruses of your favorite songs. Minutes slipped by the further he drove, you lost track of both time and kilometers, letting him tell you all about the ridiculous antics the group had been up to.

Eventually, you caught the scent of salty air and even in the dark, you had a pretty good idea where Hanta was going. He followed a winding road, making two left turns and then a right leaving you on a stretch of road that paralleled the ocean.

You let your head fall against the seat, eyes falling shut and inhaling that wonderful smell you missed so much. Hanta had just one hand lazily on the wheel, his elbow resting out the open window, a relaxed smile was illuminated in soft orange lights off his dash.

You let your head roll onto his shoulder, not as easily done without the bench seat in his station wagon but it worked nonetheless. "Thanks."

His free hand came to rest on your knee, "Anytime."

He turned the wheel, pulling over and parking in front of a small beach access that you guys had found at 3 in the morning five years prior. Hanta kicked off his shoes, leaving them in the car to avoid them being sand-filled and you did the same with the knee-high boots purely because you longed to feel the sand between your toes.

The wooden planks were worn, parts buried beneath the sand until eventually, none remained. Breaking waves flooded your ears and you made a run for them! Before you could reach the lapping water though, tape had wound around your middle and yanked you backward.

"Not happening!" Hanta said firmly. "Last time I let you talk me into late-night swimming we didn't have a change of clothes either and we both got so sick! I think I might have actually died without Bakugo's soup!"

You chuckled, remembering being nineteen and curled up with Hanta on the sofa in the living room of the apartment you all shared for nearly a week. The sniffles didn't cease for almost three weeks.

"Okay, okay, no swimming." You flopped back down into the sand, his tape still attached meaning the cellophane hero was pulled down with you. "Tell me about the stars then, Hants. Who's out tonight?"

Astronomy was a hobby of Hanta's you learned about after moving into the dorms your first year. It wasn't uncommon to find him out on the roof most nights, laying on his back and looking up into the clear night sky littered with twinkling stars, usually with a joint pressed between his lips. It became almost a habit for him to grab you on his way up, pulling you along because you were more than happy listening to him tell you about each constellation and the stories behind them.

It was around this time of year, in your final year of high school; somewhere between him recalling the greek mythos of Aries and Sagittarius that you noticed your heart beating a little faster. You realized something had shifted between the two of you, and, holy shit, was this what it felt like to have a crush! When the hell did that happen?

You'd entrusted everything to Hanta back then, and now, laying in the sand shoulder to shoulder while he talked about Draco, that familiar feeling stirred again. You remembered what it was supposed to be like when you weren't forcing it for some random guy. How simple it was supposed to be.

You inclined on an elbow and he stopped mid-sentence. "Eh, everything alright?" You nodded but he looked anything but convinced, mirroring your position and asking you again.

It was easy for you to lean forward, to brush your lips against his for the first time in three years. And, when you pulled away, he looked about as shocked as he had the night you'd done it when you were eighteen.

"You- you still like me?"

When you left for America, you'd both agreed to put a pause on your sort of relationship. Free to date and screw whomever you pleased because three years was a long time and it just seemed like a fair decision to make. The realization that he might now have someone else special in his life dawned on you...

"Yeah but I totally understand if things are different now and I shoulda asked- oof!"

He kissed you so hard you toppled back into the sand, quick pecks, one right after another, ending them with a long one that nearly left you breathless.

"I didn't know how to bring it up. I didn't want to make you feel awkward about things or make you think I expected something. I thought that maybe since we didn't talk for a while your feelings might have changed."

"I can say with confidence they haven't."

"Thank fuck." He groaned and captured your lips in another searing kiss.

It was easy to lift his shirt off, the shreds of tape that remained were now covered with gritty sand that clung to your fingers as you traced the chest and torso you knew so well. Gliding over defined muscles, lingering on old scars and mapping out new ones he'd collected in your time apart.

His own hands were busy flicking open the brass fastenings of your corset, huffing about it being so much more difficult to get to your chest and something about it being very unfair.

By the time he'd undone the last one, bright headlights shown across the beach. "Shit."

Giggling ensued from the walkway and you both sighed, at least it wasn't the police or a hero patrol. Hanta gathered his shirt and ran back to his car with his hand in yours.

"I thought our days of being caught were over."

"At least it wasn't Mr. Aizawa this time."

A chill ran down your spine remembering the night and the lecture you'd received when your teacher had caught Hanta sneaking out of your room early one morning.

"So, uh, do you still plan on going to Denki's party?" You asked innocently enough but Hanta knew you far too well.

"I think I'm gonna miss it this year." His hand found a home on your upper thigh. "Apparently, you and I have a lot of catching up to do. Lost time to make up for and all that."

"Too bad you don't have that old station wagon anymore. If you did, we wouldn't have to wait to get back."

Dark eyes glanced over at you not so subtly parting your legs.

"I dunno. It's not too often I travel in the backseat of my own car but I've been told it's pretty roomy. Lots of legroom."

Your hand ran over your legs, dipping down to lightly brush your more sensitive parts, thankful you opted for the thin pair of black leggings rather than the dark skinny jeans. Your fingers danced again and this time you let a soft moan pass your lips. "Eyes on the road, Hants."

"That's a little hard to do when I've got you spread out in the passenger's seat." He grabbed your free hand and pressed it against the bulge in his pants. "You've got me distracted, filthy little woman."

You appreciated him testing the waters, a subtle way of checking if you liked those nicknames he used only in private with you, giving you a chance to protest if your likes had changed. They were one's that only felt right coming from him and you were eager to hear more.

Forgoing your own high, you leaned over the center console as best you could, undoing his belt first, followed quickly by his zipper letting his strained cock be free.

His grip tightened on your leg when you kissed the tip of him. "Just like old times, huh?"

A chuckle turned quickly into a moan, taking him in your mouth, pushing yourself further on his cock, fighting your gag reflex to get him down your throat. Hanta reclined his seat further, giving you more room to work with.

Your legs clenched tighter with every groan you pulled from him, wiggling your hips in the seat, letting a hand fall back between your own legs. There was an attempt of a moan around his cock when his fingers coiled in your hair. "Such a good slut. Keep fuckin' goin'." He let you continue at your own speed, needing to focus as best he could on the road rather than what you were doing but, damn, you were making that increasingly difficult.

He wasn't stopping you though. He rarely did. You'd sucked him off on countless drives before and only stopped when- "That's it." He lifted you off him by your hair at the same time he pulled off the road. There was a convenient turn-off, hidden by overgrown brush you noticed before he shut off the headlights.

Hanta took you by the chin, smearing drool. "Backseat, pretty girl." He reached into the glove box and pulled out a foil wrapper, "What do you say we test out that legroom?"

He wait to watch your smile grow wide before crawling into the back because he had to be the first to go if this had any chance of working. Once situated, pants under his thighs, he patted his lap for you to climb over.

You slid easily onto his lap, hands traveling up and over his shoulders, kissing hard while you rocked your hips against impossibly hard length.

There was so much comfort in the familiarity of him. It wasn't awkward to fall back into rhythm with Hanta, to remember that he loved the feeling of your nails dragging down his chest. And he was just as eager to get your shirt off, reach your breasts he'd missed so much, and get his tongue on your nipples.

Your head tipped backward, loving the pace he set, hips bouncing creating the perfect tug on your nipples between his teeth.

"Love, if I promise to buy you a new pair, can I rip these damn leggings? They're just so thin and-"

"Please." Your breathy moan had him smirking and with a single grunt the leggings were ruined, cool air from the vents had only a moment to touch your bare ass before Hanta's hands reclaimed it.

There was no way he hadn't felt your arousal before ripping your clothes off, you soaked through your panties and leggings, you knew that, but that didn't stop him from commenting on how soaked you were now on his fingers. "Want me inside you, whore? I think you do."

You nodded with a whimper and he slipped a finger in. "Hants, noo- I- I want your cock, please."

"You're gonna take my fingers like a good little slut first." You clenched at the words falling from his mouth. "So fuckin' tight you can barely take a finger. How'm I supposed to fit in here if you can even take a single finger? Need you to loosen up, alright." He pushed another finger in, scissoring the two inside you.

"This gonna make you cum? You need this bad, don't you? Tell me. Tell me how bad you need to cum."

"I want it. Please, please, I need it. I'm so close," You babbled and ripped the foil open with his teeth, rolling it with one hand on his cock. In an instant, his fingers had been replaced with this dick. Sticky fingers on your ass helping you ease down on him with a hiss.

"Fuck," Hanta let out a throaty chuckle, "You still fuckin' feel the absolute best." He dropped a kiss between your breasts, letting you adjust to his girth. "Perfect. Good girl. Such a fuckin' good little slut."

He wasn't about to last long. Not once you started bouncing up and down on him, your tits right in front of his face.

"Couldn't even wait for me to get you home, had to fucking tease me in the damn car." He held onto the fat of your ass, pulling you along him and slamming you down hard.

"Kinda pathetic how desperate you are. Fuck. Kinda hot too."

When the top of your head bumped the roof of the car, he scooted lower, trying to give you as much room to ride him however you pleased.

"What do you need? You wanna cum, don't you, pretty girl, what do you need?"

"Faster, faster please."

Hanta shifted even lower, making you grab onto the two headrests while he thrust his hips up into you at a rapid speed. His thumb on your clit was the additional stimulation you needed to fall over the edge. Nails clawing at the black leather as he continued to moan below you now chasing his own release.

You stayed poised above him, using every last bit of strength to stay upright until his mouth was rambling and his cock pulsed inside of you. Fingers bruising your skin before holding your pelvis snuggly against his.

He was bent in a way that looked entirely uncomfortable and yet he still smiled so widely. Reaching up to brush hair out of your eyes, "You okay?"

"Perfects, Hants. A little sore but I'm sure you are too." He moved off his lap, letting him slip out of you with a groan, "Is your neck gonna be okay?"

"I'll be fine. Having you back, love, is more than worth a little bit of a neck cramp."

As he tied a knot in the condom, depositing it into a plastic bag he had tucked away under his seat, Hanta raised a brow, "Love, really, are you alright? Please, tell me if I hurt you at all."

"No! I'm good, why?"

"You're sitting silly."

You were sitting a little odd, perched on your knees rather than sitting on your ass because the leather was chilly and you told Hanta as much making him laugh. "Wait, I think I can help." He leaned back to the front of the car, flicking a button making it glow. Once he tucked himself back in his pants he hopped out of the car and you could see him rummaging in his trunk through the rear window.

"I keep forgetting to take this out from our camping trip a couple months ago. Guess it turned out to be a good thing." He laid the blanket down over the passenger's seat, declaring that should help a bit.

You wrapped the now toasty warm blanket around your bottom half while Hanta drove back towards the city, your head on his shoulder, his hand on your thigh.

"So, shopping tomorrow? I believe I owe you a pair of leggings..."

"It's a date."

[redpandaramblings]

Like Caramel For Chocolate- An Omega Bakugou x Alpha f!Reader fic. Part 6

Part 1 Here

Next part Here

Content Warning: Negative headspace, omegaverse, self deprecation, depressive thoughts, pushy parental figures, ambiguous omegaverse reproduction, unhealthy relationships, relationship that could be easily fixed if idiots would use their words and communicate, Shinso/Denki side relationship, Bakugou is a dumbass but so is y/n

Where we left off-

Before Bakugou could reply, the jeweler came back into the room and handed Denki a piece of paper.

“All right sir, here is your receipt! Your ring should be ready in three days.”

“Thanks.” Denki shoved the receipt into his pocket, quickly making his way to the door. “See you around Bakubro. Don't want to be late for my shift.” The door closed behind him with a bang.

Bakugou wasn’t annoyed though. Now he could pick out the perfect ring for Y/N and not worry about Kaminari being nearby. Everyone knows Kami can’t keep a secret to save his life.

“I don’t know how much longer I can keep all of this a secret.” Denki moaned into his hands. He was sitting with his head buried in his arms. Y/N reached across the table and gently petted his hair.

“I know what you mean, but I don’t think either of us are in a good position to start telling people.”

Y/n and Denki sat in a secluded corner of a dimly lit cafe. Both of them had this time free and both of them definitely needed to talk. They stood a lot less chance of anyone asking questions if they were just two friends getting lunch instead of them privately going to each other’s apartments.

Denki looked up, giving Y/N a wide eyed expression. “I know, but I wasn’t expecting Bakugou to show up when I was dropping off that abomination of a ring! I just was lucky the jeweler had already taken it to the back. You were right by the way, that thing is absolutely horrendous. Like, was the designer blind?”

Y/N snorted. “From what I’ve heard, great great grandpappy had a lot more money than brains and wanted to impress his omega by shoving as many stones onto a ring as possible.”

“No kidding. I think it can be seen from space.”

“Very likely.” Y/N chuckled before slumping back into her seat with a sigh. “Though I might have an idea about what Bakugou was doing there.”

“Wait, seriously?”

Y/N nodded with a sigh. “Yeah. When I got back he invited me to the summer festival. I’d forgotten about it.”

“Ah shit, yeah. Isn’t that your guys' anniversary?”

“Yep.” Y/N sighed, rubbing her forehead. “Of course he had to pick this time to actually celebrate. We haven’t gone or done anything… God, I think since he became a hero.”

“So you think he was getting a gift.” Denki sat back as the server came, placing your orders in front of each of you. You both murmured your thank yous and waited until the server was out of earshot before resuming your conversation.

“Yeah, he had to have been. Makes me feel terrible, but there wasn’t a good time to… Well…”

Y/n gestured between herself and Denki.

“Tell him that you’ve been betrothed to an omega of much superior looks, breeding, and manners?”

You gave Denki a little kick under the table as he cackled. He grinned cheekily as he poked at his food. “Sorry. Humor is my coping mechanism. I get it though. Timing sucks all the way around.”

You nodded, sighing and taking a bite of your own food. “Can’t say anything during his heat. Then his schedule was swamped, and I had to sort things out with you. Then bam, anniversary that for some reason he decided to remember this year.”

Denki snorted, popping a bite into his mouth. “That’s about the long and the short of it. And we haven’t even begun to figure out how to tell everyone we’ve not only accepted arranged betrothals, but that we’re engaged to each other.”

“I don’t know, I was kind of hoping we could just move to Tahiti and never speak to our former friend groups ever again?”

“A valid possibility. But that means we’d have to learn French and maybe Tahitian. You know I only passed English because Hitoshi and his dad coached me.”

“Fair point.” You sighed heavily. “But I’m really not looking forward to these conversations.”

“They have to happen though. You might have some anonymity to hide behind, but I’d rather my friends not find out about our engagement when they see an article about Chargebolt getting married.”

“Really?” You smirked slightly. “Then you’re going to tell everyone at your agency, hmm?”

Denki kicked you under the table. “Shut up!”

You poked at your food again as the smile fell from your lips. “So… Did you get a chance to think about what I sent you?”

Kaminari nodded. “Yeah. And I hate to say it, but I think you’re right.”

“I thought about it a lot. I hate to leave the area, but it would be too awkward to stay here after everything.”

A few days ago you had sent Denki an email with a list of places that had job openings that would suit both of you. You both loved where you lived, but after everything, how could you stay? There’s no way the two of you could continue to keep living in the same apartment building as Bakugou. That would be cruel. Cruel to whom you didn’t quite want to think about. You spoke up again.

“Any place catch your eye?”

Kaminari nodded. “I was kind of thinking Okinawa. I have a few connections there. Decent distance from here and from our parents. And that would probably be the easiest transition.”

“Works for me.” You said, as if it wasn’t ripping your heart out to do this. It hurt. But it had to happen. In the end, you had to believe this was what was best for everyone. It might take some time, but this was it. This was what would make everyone happy in the long run.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shinsou was worried. Denki had been acting odd. And that’s saying something. The blond omega was usually loud and bubbly, the life of the agency. At least once a week, he invited Shinsou out for drinks, meals, clubs, karaoke, or some other nonsense. But ever since he’d gotten back from his three day leave, Kaminari had been acting strange. When he thought no one was looking, he was quiet. Withdrawn. Like he was puzzling out the toughest problem of his life.

Denki having a problem? Pretty typical. Denki having a problem and not talking to Shinsou about it? Pretty unusual. The blond had always come to the purple haired alpha with even the simplest of problems. Apartment searches, furniture assembly, what support items would suit his quirk best, even things like what to get from Starbucks. And even though he might groan and roll his eyes, secretly Hitoshi loved every second of it. When he had helped by digging through websites, cobbling together a rickety shelf, or reminding Denki that he always got the most cloyingly sweet items on the menu; Hitoshi got to pretend that he was Denki’s alpha.

Shinsou wasn’t sure exactly when he had fallen in love with Denki. Probably had been since high school at least. His dad had warned him against loud blonds while his father had laughed. But he couldn’t help it. Kaminari had been one of the first people to enthusiastically believe in him. Had always sought him out and wormed his way into Shinsou’s life and heart. And now Shinsou couldn’t understand it, but Denki was pulling away. Even as he watched the blond who was typing up a report on his computer, it somehow felt like Kaminari was slipping right through his fingers.

Shinsou cleared his throat. Kaminari glanced up. “Yeah man? What’s up?”

“You doing okay, Denks? You’ve seemed a little out of it.”

Denki met his eyes, startled, then quickly glanced away. “Yeah. Yep! Totally fine.”

“Denki. I know you.”

Kaminari sighed and slumped on his desk. “Just some life stuff. Family stuff. Friend stuff.”

Shinsou frowned, walking over to place a hand on Denki’s shoulder. “You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

Denki snorted and laughed quietly. Shinsou furrowed his brows.

“Yeah” Denki sighed. “I know. But half of it isn’t really my stuff to tell and the other half isn’t exactly worth talking about.”

“You sure? We could go grab one of your obnoxiously sweet coffees after work. Go to mine or yours, watch an old crappy horror.”

“Tempting. Thanks man. I would, really, but I got some stuff I have to do after work. Some other time maybe.”

Shinsou frowned. It was rare for the omega to turn down an invitation for a movie night. Hell, it was rare for Denki to turn down an invitation, end stop. It made him even more worried about his omega… friend. His omega friend. His friend who just so happens to be an omega. Hitoshi closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He really didn’t want to ruin the best friendship he had. But he couldn’t keep this up much longer. His alpha had decided on the electric blond long ago, and the omega’s unusual behavior and unhappy scent was driving him wild with the need to protect. He really needed to pull himself together and confess soon.

“Well, whenever you’re free then,” Shinsou said, reluctantly letting his hand fall from Denki’s shoulder. “You know my number.”

Denki nodded and looked up, giving him half a smile. “I do. Thanks Shinsou.”

Shinsou walked back to his desk, his mind made up. He needed to tell his omega how he felt, and soon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N twisted and turned, looking at herself in the mirror. It had been a very long time since she’d worn a yukata. It didn’t feel right to dress up like this. But wearing anything else also felt wrong. Everything about this date felt wrong. Like this was the kind of she she did in another life. And now here she was, going on a date with the man she loved. Who she’d always love. And who she’d already decided she was going to let go.

Y/N snorted and fussed with her hair a bit. Maybe she should have just refused this date. Claimed to be sick or something. But that felt wrong too. So, she just had to get through tonight. After all, what’s one more night of pretending everything is fine? Hopefully this could be a good memory from a relationship that just wasn’t meant to be. After tonight, she’d wait a couple days and then talk to Bakugou and let him go like he clearly wanted.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Katsuki was going to throw up.

He was going to throw up, right here, all over himself and all over shitty hair, too. His red headed friend was giving him a pep talk as he helped Bakugou into his jinbei. Not that Bakugou needed the help. Or the pep talk. It just was easier to let the squad come over when they had found out about his date. It’s not like he wanted them there or anything. Once Kiri, Mina, and Sero realized he was going to use this date to ask Y/N to be his mate, they had insisted on helping him get ready.

None of them knew about the little velvet box in his pocket and that his plans went further than just asking Y/N to be his mate. Bakugou bit his lip to keep from frowning as he looked over his friends, a certain loud blond conspicuously missing. You wouldn’t hear Katsuki admit it out loud, but he really wished Denki could have been here. He loved the others, and they were great in their own ways. But Denki was his pack’s other omega. He got it in a way that the others didn’t. After tonight, he’d have to make sure to catch Pikachu up on all the news. Hell, maybe he could help his fellow blond finally talk to that purple haired idiot he’d been mooning over for years. Everyone in the pack knew Denki’s family had been harping at him to settle down for quite a while.

Bakugou looked up in time to see Mina coming at him with the hair grease. He threw up his hands.

“Fuck no! Keep that shit away from me!”

“You’ve got to do something about that pile of straw you call a haircut. Besides, Wouldn’t it be nostalgic? Weren’t you interning for Best Jeanist again when you asked Y/N out the first time?”

“Yes, and I’d rather shave myself bald than ever have my hair like that again!”

Mina sighed. “Fine. We’ll do something else. But if I can’t slick it back, you will be wearing eyeliner!”

“IN YOUR DREAMS, PINKY!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You waited outside the entrance to the festival. It was strangely soothing to watch the people flow by, like you were a rock overlooking a stream. There were groups of friends, couples both young and old, families where the laughing children ran ahead of their parents eager to get inside. You gave a small smile at the last. Maybe that could be you someday, a parent getting to see a festival through the eyes of a child again. Though the mental picture was hazier than it used to be. The children you half imagined just blurs of colorful yukatas, instead of loud and stubborn blond haired brats with their father’s eyes and attitude. You huffed a quiet laugh to yourself as a thought occurred to you. If you and Kaminari actually went through with this plan, decent chance the kids would still be blond. The thought hurt a little.

“Y/N!”

You looked up and had the breath knocked out of your lungs.

Katsuki was beautiful. You knew it. Thought it often, even. But tonight he practically glowed. His hair had been tamed into a softer look than usual. The jinbei he wore was the perfect compliment to his skintone. Was that… Yes. Dark eyeliner made his crimson eyes pop. Your heart ached. You’d always love this man. No matter how it tore you apart, he’d always own part of your heart and soul. You smiled weakly and raised your hand in greeting.

“Hey. You look good.”

“Thanks.” Bakugou scratched the back of his head. “Mina got ahold of me.”

“That explains it then.”

“Hey!” Katsuki gently elbowed you in the side before taking his place next to you. “You saying I can’t dress up on my own?”

“Yes.”

“Y/N!” You dodged out of the way as he swatted at you, laughing. Yes. This could be it. One last good night.

“Shall we go in?” You asked, holding out your hand.

“That’s why we’re here, isn’t it?” Katsuki asked as he walked past you, ignoring your hand.

You gave a quiet smile as you followed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Katsuki picked at his food, none of it making it to his mouth. He was going to be sick. He was going to be sick right here and some paparazzi was going to see and take a picture and the big headline tomorrow was going to be “A Puke Worthy Proposal.” He was trying his best to keep up the illusion that everything was fine and normal, but it was rough. It had been a long time since he’d taken his alpha on even a normal date. And this wasn’t any normal date. It didn’t help that things were feeling forced and awkward.

He wanted to hold your hand, but his own hands were sweating buckets. He tried to keep up casual conversation, but that was getting harder and harder as the night wore on. Every sentence he wanted to just blurt it out and get it over with. It was impossible to keep talking about what vendors he recognized when all he wanted to say was “I love you and I’ll always love you and I want you by my side until the sun stops shining.”

It didn’t help that things felt awkward. Almost nothing was feeling easy or natural. It really had been far too long since the two of you had gone on any sort of date. He frowned as he thought about it. It had been over a year, at least. Longer, even. Well, he was going to have to fix that. He’d be able to use some of that pro hero paycheck and spoil you like you deserved. His Y/N. His mate. And soon, his wife.

Bakugou stared at nothing, his eyes going unfocus as he started daydreaming about how spectacular your wedding would be.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was a disaster. You glanced over to where Bakugou stood picking at his food, looking bored. You’d been trying to keep up the conversation, but for the past several minutes you’d only gotten hums or grunts in response to anything you said.

“It’s amazing how they got all those pro heroes to dance nude as one of the main attractions this year.”

Katsuki grunted.

Yeah, he wasn’t paying attention at all.

You sighed, looking down at your own untouched food. You never should have agreed to come. At least this date was proving it to you. This had to end. The two of you didn’t know how to be a couple anymore. It was even clearer that Katsuki wasn’t even interested in trying. You had no idea why he wanted to have this date in the first place. Some bizarre sense of obligation? Maybe his heat had shaken him up enough that his omega needed the sense of normalcy? This issue was this wasn’t normal for the two of you anymore. It hadn’t been for a very long time. You sighed, glancing around for a trash can to oust you untouched dango.

A loud pop caused you to look up. The fireworks were about to start.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bakugou looked up at the sound of the first firework.

“Wanna head to the pier?”

You nodded quietly, following him as he led the way. He was sweating so much now that if he set himself off he’d take out half the city.

This was it. It was almost time. The two of you were going to watch the fireworks from the out of the way pier like you had all those years ago. It was at the end of that fireworks show the two of you had had your first kiss. And this time… Well this time at the end of the show he was going to propose and you were going to say yes, and it was going to be perfect.

That is if he didn’t barf before you two got there.

“Hurry up,” he grunted as he picked up the pace.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You tried not to flinch at Bakugou’s harsh tone. He clearly wanted to get this night over with even more than you did. You tried not to let it hurt.

The pier was empty as it always was. The lack of lighting keeping others away. The first time you had discovered it, it had felt hidden and intimate. Now it felt desolate. Lonely.

You walked up to the railing and stared at the sky. The fireworks didn’t feel magical anymore either. Your fingers wrapped around the railing as you glanced to the side. Bakugou wasn’t even looking up. He was staring at the reflections of flashes in the dark swirling water below.

You couldn’t do this anymore.

No more.

The fireworks illuminated you as your grip on the railing tightened until your knuckles turned white.

“Katsuki?”

“”What?” He asked roughly, barely glancing your way.

“Let’s break up.”

And that was Part 6, my darlings! Hope you're enjoying the drama, because there's more angst on the way! You can scream at me about the cliffhanger in replies, reblogs, tags or asks. :P

TAGLIST- @yzviea, @not-a-pushover, @thelilypieforever, @kumihayu, @aomi04, @ladybakugouu, @luajosephdun-blog, @hakunamatatayqueen, @my-thoughts-are-weird, @left-alone-yuki, @officialtrashbusiness, @lonelyheart-clubband, @katsuki-cait, @moonwritters26, @animexholic, @kyrah-williams, @emilymikado, @wolvesblaxe360, @ficklemcselfish, @helena-way07, @fandomsaremylifesposts, @baby-bakuhoe, @sukeraa, l@ucypevensie11, @idk-sam, @katsuki-cait, @weirdestlove, @sasa-slayer, @anime-for-live, @kaidousimp, @bluesdustyflames, @vitheria, @milktea0208, @maristaymulti, @whatdidshesayyy, @memesbyeloise , @fandomsgotmefucked, @killmehe, @shy-panda02 Just a reminder, if you want tagged make sure you have the ability to be tagged turned on; and I’d have to be informed if your blog name changes! Cheers, Darlings!

[delicrieux]

☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 "𝚘𝚑"

PART 8: CAT BOYS 

... it’s late into the night and y/n is streaming with one of her new friends, sykkuno. running on caffeine and redbull is apparently not enough because she falls asleep on his shoulder 45 minutes into their cyberpunk gameplay. at that exact moment, twitter goes up in flames.

─── corpse husband x reader, sykkuno x reader (because i was threatened by thirsty anons) ─── soc. media + written fiction!  ─── word count: 1.8k author’s note: here it is...what yall been asking for. literally had to add a new part for this but i loved this idea sm i couldnt just nOT NOT do it. i tried writing this with the same energy as the smau lmao so expect chaos as always. hope you enjoy it and as always lmk what u think! hopefully yall wont go too feral, but tbh thats prolly too much to ask for xx EDIT: srr for the fucky format tumbler dot com is being lame 

ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous.   ҉   next.

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Such a back and forth continues for the better part of the day as you get ready. Corpse only whines a bit when you forget to text him back - you are packing, and your prestigious cat ears you bought from Amazon for 10$ deserve exquisite care - which only fuels your seemingly bottomless hunger for mischief, leading to you sneakily ignoring him more. When your phone lights up with a message, you giggle, giddy with excitement. Your laughter only gets louder and more erratic, to the point where Rae had busted down your door and threw her Hello Kitty plush at you - one you’d gotten her, mind you! - and told you to just “Shut the fuck up!”

Ungrateful. You know not everyone can appreciate your sense of humor, or stand your hyena like cackle, but that was uncalled for and you told her as much. Noting the mess your room is in (more than usual, that’s for certain), she leans onto the door frame, crossing her arms over her chest, pretty brown eyes twinkling curiously, “Where you off to?”

“So I had this idea-” You start, but are promptly shut down with a raise of her palm.

“Already know it’s a bad one.”

Insulted, and hurt, you clutch your heart. As if she had not mocked you enough today, “Rae...The hell, that’s so mean...” You mutter, face scrunching into a soft frown, “I only wanted to tell you what me and Syk thought of.”

“Oh?” Intrigued, she raises a brow, “Continue.”

“Gee, thanks for letting me this time.” You mumble, rolling your eyes, “So. We thought we’d stream together. The catch? In the same room! We’ll be playing Cyberpunk. Gotta cash in while the hype is still up.” You add, making her snort, “And, ya know, the whole cat boy business...We’ll be wearing matching cat ears. Admit it, I’m a genius.”

She’s quiet for a moment, mulling over your words; you can practically see the gears in her head turning. She glances around the room, then briefly at you, strangely apprehensive. “You sure that’s a good idea?”

Well, that is definitely not what you expected her to say. You figured it’d be more along the lines of you’d be one ugly cat. “Huh?” Is all you manage to stutter, “What do you mean?”

She gives you a look, one all people give when something is so plainly obvious, “Y/n. You do know the stans will go wild, right? And you do remember our conversation involving Corp-”

“Nope!” You exclaim cheerily with a bright smile to match. You don’t want to think about that. The relationship between you and Corpse is strictly platonic, and besides, seeing Twitter loosing their shit is always funny, and you never miss an opportunity to mess with your fans. Sykkuno is also a good friend, albeit a new one. This supposed flirting from Corpse’s end Rae deduced was nothing more than her projecting her feelings onto the situation. She always liked shoujo anime and was probably thinking one was happening right in front of her. Not a chance. Corpse was just being a friendly crackhead. Your energies mesh beautifully.

Like, beautifully in a strictly friend way. Absolutely nothing more than that.

She gives up, naturally, arguing with a wall would be more productive than arguing with you. You’re such a (Zodiac sign).

“Well,” She mumbles, ticking her head to the side, leaning off of the door frame and turning to leave, “Don’t say I didn’t tell you so.”

Your grin melts as soon as she leaves. Glancing at your bag, you shove your last necessities in with newfound hesitance. 

Nothing bad will happen, right?

...Right?

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It is well past the generally set “appropriate” time to hang out, but since quarantine, what is appropriate anymore anyway? You’ve never been in Sykkuno’s apartment, but now that you’re here it’s...strangely him. Every corner seems tailored to his specific requirements. It’s cozy, and pleasantly warm - it’s a bit chilly in LA, as surprising as that is.

He’s even shyer than you remember him being. And a whole lot more awkward, but in an endearing way, a way that makes you want to laugh and try to reassure him that it’s just you and he has nothing to worry about. While you hung out only once, the history you share is rich and tender. From him following you on Twitter and subsequently prematurely ending your stream, to kidnapping a stray cat affectionately named Juan. His long lost brother, Juan (no the Second, just Juan), lives in your Minecraft server. 

His stream room is sadly bare. There’s an appalling lack of merch or fairy lights. Not even led-lights. It’s a good thing you brought your own. As you try to decided which color would be best - his signature lime green, reminiscent of his adorable Among Us astronaut, or, perhaps, mischievous violet? - he boots the game and tweets out a quick “streaming with y/n in ten mins! come one come all!” 

“You should probably tell your fans, too.” He mumbles, looking somewhere above your shoulder. You settle with cherry blossom pink. Glancing at him, you shrug.

“Ah, do it for me, please?”

“Oh!” He hiccups, “Uhm, I wouldn’t want to pry and I don’t know your password and-”

“It doesn’t have a password.” You had removed it, knowing something like this would happen. Bless your foresight, you did not want him to know it was demonspiitinmymouth. Before he could protest further, you rush to the nearest mirror to put on your cat ears and make sure they aren’t crooked. You look absolutely adorable. The cat boys in your dms will go feral. Hell, you might just go feral looking at yourself! Sykkuno is not ready. No one is. This will be a stream to remember.

When you return (with flourish of course), he’s anxiously fidgeting by his computer, his own little cat ears, one’s he wore for the Halloween stream, peaking out from his silky brown hair. You have to suppress a squeal. When he catches you gaze he gives the kindest, sweetest little smile.

“They, uh--” He points at you, then decides it’s rude to point, bringing his hand back to his lap, then clutching his mouse, lastly releasing a sound stuck between a chuckle and a wheeze, “suit you, uhm, a lot!” He finishes with a resolute nod, quickly spinning in his chair and away from you.

This is the reaction you desired. All is going according to plan. Is this what God feels like? If not, then you pity her. She’s missing out.

Taking a seat next to him - he had been gracious enough to haul you a spare chair from the kitchen - you draw closer, and he, instinctively, shrinks away with another nervous chuckle. 

“You have, uhm... I-I didn’t look!” He quickly chimes. You raise a brow, “Uhm, unopened messages? From Corpse? He texted you when I was tweeting! I didn’t mean to look, I’m sorry-”

Instantly, you recall the famous vine with the scandalous “daddy chill” line, though refrain from saying it aloud. You love havoc, but you’re not evil (Rae would ardently disagree with you, though). Instead, you just shrug, “’S fine, don’t worry. I’ll text him back later. Let’s start?”

He nods, but doesn’t look at you. Granted, you don’t think he glanced at you even once since you returned, “...Okay. Ready?”

“Ready!”

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You’re much too immersed into the game and Sykkuno’s twitch chat to even check what’s happening on Twitter, but your estimated guess is that everyone’s going crazy. The stream chat is unruly as well, but missing the signature Twitter spark. Most of the chaos is bravely lead by your fans. Sykkuno’s, much like the man himself, are too nice to scream so unabashedly.

Perhaps you excitement had been a bit too taxing, perhaps drinking 5 coffees and 2 energy drinks today and not enough water are to blame for the sudden drowsiness you’re feeling, but you can’t focus on the swimming chat or the abundance of cut-scenes at the starting point of the game. You steadily draw nearer and he, more composed in front of his audience, doesn’t react. About ten more minutes of hoovering by his shoulder and muttering soft commentary, and you feel yourself slipping.

The last coherent thought you have is a few choice words directed at caffeine itself for having the opposite effect of you at the worst time possible.

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You float in oblivion for perhaps ten minutes at best. Once you awake with a startle, you shower Sykkuno in shy apologies and he quickly reassures you that it’s fine and that he didn’t mind at all!

“Though,” He adds after a thoughtful pause, “not sure if it was very, uh, comfortable?”

His stream chat spams uwu and variations of similar kind. The stream continues for a few more hours before the both of you wish everyone a good night. 

While you planned on wreaking absolute havoc, this sudden falling asleep was unexpected. You pondered the consequences of such an innocent, unplanned act whilst ubering home, fearing to check your phone which by now was blowing up with not only Twitter notifications but also Rae’s angry messages that vaguely read “what the fuck y/n”. Within the past two hours she had left 57 messages on all platforms collectively, including 7 calls. 

Corpse’s last text was over three hours ago.

Now that’s strange. Worry festers quickly. Briefly glancing at your surroundings - the pretty glimmer of passing street lights, neon signs, familiar buildings - you decide that it’s time to check what kind of nuclear explosion you’ve caused.

Your heart drops to the bottom of your stomach as you scroll past the hundreds of tweets and mentions. Scan through Rae’s messages. 

You had failed to prepare ahead. Every explosion of such kind is followed by nuclear winter. And Corpse’s lack of messages feels especially cold.

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Not you smiling like a fucking idiot reading his last message! You shrink into the backseat, afraid the driver will accidentally look into the rear-view mirror and see you a bit too happy before asking questions. Good news? Yeah, but it’s not like it’s his any beeswax! In the words of Rihanna, just shut up and drive. 

This argument had not yet happened, but you’re preparing, just in case. 

As you think up of potential scenarios, your eyes drill into Corpse’s goodnight text. You’ve looked at it enough. Time to turn the phone screen off. Leave the app, at the very least. When the screen dims you instantly press on it to wake it up. This is embarrassing. Maybe the deadly amount of caffeine really did mess you up, big time. Your heart races in your chest, painfully almost. You feel a bit sick. Worst of all, you can’t stop smiling.

A notification from Rae makes you snap out of it. Ah, one more demon to deal with. 

However, before you talk to her, you really need to tell Twitter that you’re not with Sykkuno. And apologize to Sykkuno as well. 

At least Corpse doesn’t hate you.

Fucking hell, just exit the chat you idiot!

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tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @slashersdream - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai - @truly-dionysus - @multi-fandom-central707

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

If I Fell For You (Part 6) - Best Friends

Summary: While out with Jensen and some of his new co-stars, the reader bumps into her father again. This time Jensen knows the truth though and nearly starts a fight. After calming him down, the reader and he have an impromptu date that ends up with Jensen sharing a secret about himself...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x nanny!reader

Word Count: 4,800ish

Warnings: language, angst, body insecurities, scars, smut (oral), mention of a dead parent

A/N: I love all of this part so much! Enjoy!

________

The room was toasty warm when you woke the next morning. It took a split second to remember you weren’t in your room and that there was a warm body next to you. Your did a tiny stretch and felt a weight over your waist. It pulled you closer and you smiled, lazily opening your eyes.

“Good morning sunshine,” he said, hair spiked up every which way, green eyes big and sleepy. 

“Morning,” you said, shutting your eyes again and nuzzling him.

“Just when I thought you couldn’t be any more adorable in the mornings, I get to see you waking up,” he said. He played with a piece of your hair and you threw your arm over his waist, holding onto him. “You’re so fucking cute.”

“Cuddle buddies, remember?” you mumbled.

“I’m down for that,” he said. He squeezed you and giggled, kissing your forehead until you turned your head upwards. “Hi.”

“Hi handsome,” you said. He pecked a kiss on your lips, a trio of feet running down the hall. 

“The vultures are awake. Prepare for impact.”

“What?” you said, the door opening and three very small bodies climbing up on the bed.

“Y/N, what are you doing in daddy’s bed?” asked Arrow.

“Don’t you guys want to sleep in for like once?” asked Jensen. He pulled her down to his other side, Zeppelin doing a dive right between you and Jensen, while JJ plopped down behind you. A pillow was knocked over his face as the twins started crawling over him, Jensen chuckling and pushing it out of the way. His face poked out just as JJ started to jump behind you, a little smile there. “Welcome to my Sunday mornings.”

“Glad I was invited this time,” you said. He was about to speak when he squeezed his eyes shut and bent his body in half.

“Zeppelin,” he grit out. “No jumping on daddy’s lap, remember?”

“Oh. I forgot,” he said.

“Who wants pancakes this morning?” you asked. All three shot their hands up and you smiled. “Well you better go brush your teeth if you want some. Go on guys.”

They ran off the bed and out of the room, Jensen laughing when you moved the pillow away.

“Think you’ll survive?” you asked. 

“That kid is single handedly going to guarantee I can’t have more children,” he chuckled. He sat up and stared at you, looking you over. 

“That’s not a conversation for right now.”

“No, it’s not. But...are you interested in your own?” he asked.

“My mom didn’t have my blood but she was still my mom. I don’t need to make a kid to love it,” you said.

“I know. I wonder is all.”

“I’m not sure.”

“Okay,” he said softly.

“Are you, in more?”

“I don’t know. I’m almost 43, in like a month. I don’t want to…I don’t want to have a kid so late in life that they see me go early in their life, you know? That’d be cruel to do.”

“You got a lot of road ahead of you. You’re not like seventy, dude.”

“I know. Everything this year just…it’s just one more kid someday that’s gonna get hurt,” he said.

“It’s one more kid to love too though. Let’s talk about this much, much further down the line, okay?”

“Okay with me,” he said. You rolled out of bed and he followed after, holding his hands over himself. 

“You need an ice pack?” you asked.

“No, I’m good,” he said. “He’s a little...up this morning is all.”

“Oh I noticed,” you said. His cheeks went pink and you laughed. “Dude. Morning wood is normal.”

“Oh. Good. I thought maybe considering what you told me last night it might have...bothered you,” he said.

“I don’t got a problem with dicks or sex. I got a problem with people invading my personal space with them without my consent,” you said. “We cool?”

“Yeah. I’m gonna take care of this. I’ll be down in a second,” he said.

“Have fun,” you said, winking as you headed out.

“The view of you in my clothes is not helping,” he said. You swayed your hips and heard him groan. “You’re gonna pay for that.”

“I sure hope so,” you laughed. You changed into some fresh clothes in your room, something comfortable for the day before you jogged downstairs and found the three of them watching cartoons. “Okay. So who wants to help make breakfast?”

Two Weeks Later

“Shopping buddy!” said Antony when you and Jensen found your way over to the table where he and a few of Jensen’s other new cast mates were getting a drink and some food.

“Wow you really are too adorable when you’re not playing a psychopath,” you said, sliding into the booth beside him, getting a hug. “Hi. I’m Y/N, his shopping buddy.”

“Erin, Karl,” said Jensen. “Don’t you have a super huge crush on Karl, Y/N?”

“Yours is bigger,” you said, a waiter bringing over a pair of drinks and setting them down. You were about to order when you looked at the man and rolled your eyes. “You gotta be kidding me.”

“We’d like a new waiter. Now,” said Jensen. He stared at you and then Jensen before nodding and leaving.

“What was that about?” asked Erin.

“That was my father. We’re not on good terms,” you said. 

“Gotcha. So how’s a pretty girl like you end up with this ugly?” said Karl. 

“Aw, he thinks you’re pretty,” teased Jensen.

“I got eyes for you too, Jensen. Don’t be jealous,” he chuckled.

“Later guys,” said Jensen, arm over your shoulder as you headed for your car a few hours later. “Thanks for going. I’m still getting to know everyone.”

“I had fun. I like your new friends. I’d like to get to know Jared more when we’re back home.”

“Really?” he asked with a soft smile.

“He’s your best friend. You talk to the guy everyday. He’s important to you.”

“Yes he is. I’d definitely love for you guys to get along.”

“Me too,” you said, arm around his waist. 

“Y/N,” you heard behind you and froze, Jensen already spinning around and pushing you behind him.

“Buddy stay the fuck away from her. I’m serious,” said Jensen.

“That’s my daughter,” he said.

“I’d rather die than hurt my daughters unlike some people. Get your piece of shit ass away from us,” said Jensen.

“Y/N, I got help,” he said, looking past Jensen. “I did.”

“Do I look like I care?”

“Y/N-” he said, trying to get around Jensen and earning a shove for it instead. 

“I told you to back off.”

“Hey,” you heard from outside the restaurant, Jensen’s co-stars walking down from where they were waiting for their ride. “What’s going on here?”

“Leave,” Jensen told your father again.

“I want to talk to-”

“Excuse me but I think our friends asked you to leave them alone,” said Antony. You swallowed and noticed people starting to look. The last thing you needed was this turning into a fight and all of them ending up on the front of TMZ.

“Dad,” you said, brushing past Jensen. “Stay the fuck out of my life. Come near me again and I’ll call the cops.”

“I am sorry for what happened.” Jensen growled and you put a hand on his chest, pushing him back.

“You want to make it up to me?” you asked. “Move to Alaska, somewhere I’ll never have to see your face again.”

“Y/N-”

“Leave and never, I mean never, come back.”

He went back into the restaurant and you took a deep breath, glancing down.

“Sorry about that,” you said.

“You guys good?” they asked and you nodded. “Jensen?”

“Yeah I’m good. I’ll see you guys at work,” he said. You pulled him away and down the sidewalk, holding his hand tightly. “Don’t step in front of me like that.”

“Why?”

“I don’t want you near him. Ever.”

“Forget about him. Please. We had fun tonight. That’s all I want to focus on.”

“Okay,” he said when you got to the crosswalk. He pulled you into his side and kissed your temple.

“You’re shaking,” you said.

“I’m freaking out a little bit to be honest,” he said. You hugged him and walked across the street, pulling him into a bar. You found a quiet table in the corner and got him an old fashioned, leaving him seated while you got an order of pretzels too. 

“Eat this,” you said, placing the basket of warm soft dough in front of him. He picked one up and ripped it apart, dipping it in mustard and then the cheese.

“This is really good,” he said. You pulled off his hat and carded your fingers through his hair, Jensen glancing down. “I’m sorry. I should be taking care of you right now.”

“I’m okay and I happen to like taking care of you. Always have,” you said. He nodded and rested his head on your shoulder, eating quietly as you listened to an in house band play on the other side of the bar. “I like this place. It’s kinda quaint.”

“Try some,” he said, holding up the pretzel. You took a bite and hummed. “S’good.”

“Very good. You feel like you calmed down some.”

“I thought he might hurt you. I was so fucking angry it scared me.”

“But you still listened to me and calmed down for me. I’m not gonna be mad that you want to protect me from him.” 

“I feel like I can’t do anything to protect people I care about anymore.”

“Did she ever have to force you to relax?”

“Hm?”

“Your wife. Did she make you take time off or relax or have a lazy day?” you asked. 

“Yeah. How’d you know that?”

“I think your life has been so busy for so long you forget to have the quiet moments to yourself, even though I think that’s truly what you enjoy. I think you had more fun tonight than you would have without me because new people make you nervous. I think you were thrown on pause for so long after the accident that you didn’t realize that you can’t ever go back to how it was, no matter how much you want it to. You need to take more time for you Jensen. The fate of the world doesn’t rest on your shoulders. You can sleep in. You can take a day for yourself and not constantly be with the kids for hours and hours on end. You can take a second to breathe. You gotta. I’m okay. Even if something had happened tonight, it’s not the end of the world.”

He lifted his head up and blinked a few times at you. His hand cupped your cheek and he kissed you, tasting like bourbon and mustard, something different about it this time. Something possessive, something softer. 

“Better?” you asked, stroking his cheek.

“I’m better,” he said, turning into the touch. “You scare me most of all, you know.”

“Why?”

“Cause this is either going to turn out really good or really bad and I’m so fucking tired of being scared.”

“Don’t be,” you said quietly. He swallowed and you looked him up and down. “You’re my best friend. I don’t want you to be scared of me.”

“You’re my best friend too,” he said, nodding and taking a deep breath. You scooted closer and hugged him, Jensen returning it for a long moment. You sat back against the corner and turned him to lean back against you, both of you watching over towards where the band played. He sipped on his drink and you played with his hair, picking at the pretzel while you held him. “Y/N.”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me, honey,” you said, kissing the top of his head. “That’s my job.”

He tilted his head back and looked up at you with the biggest green eyes you’d ever seen, a warm feeling filling you. You bent down and kissed him, Jensen grinning by the time you were straightening yourself out. 

A few minutes went by and some more, Jensen ordering a few more drinks and food while you used the bathroom. You returned to your table and picked at fat mozzarella sticks and chicken wings, sipping on a way too expensive scotch while you listened to the band play, tucked away in Jensen’s side. 

“Can I admit something?” he asked while you dunked a cheese stick into a tiny cup of marinara. “I kinda like this more than our date a few weeks ago. Our dress up one. Don’t get me wrong, you were gorgeous but this is kinda perfect all things considered.”

“I’m a cheap date Ackles. Give me some bar food, some music and a cuddle and I’m a happy girl,” you said. You held up your stick and he bit off the end before you popped the other piece in your mouth. “I like this date too. Found out I’m your best friend and all.”

“Do you wanna…” he trailed off. You turned your head up and saw the look in his eye. You nodded and smiled, the two of you getting into your coats and heading outside. You barely caught the name of the bar before Jensen was pulling you after him down towards the car. 

He turned up the heat when you were inside and drove out of the city, finding a quiet and dark little field not too far from the house. 

“Um, I wasn’t...expecting this,” he said. You smirked and sat back in your seat, Jensen turning off the car but leaving the heat running. “I don’t even know what I’m…”

“I’ve never made out in the back of a car before,” you said with a shrug. “I’ve also never made out in the back of a car with you either so…”

“I was thinking something more…” he said, taking a deep breath.

“I’m not on birth control,” you said. 

“I’m not having sex with you for the first time in the back of a car. I have more class than that,” he chuckled. You unbuckled your seatbelt and shrugged out of your coat, leaning over as he backed up against his door. 

“If you’re not ready for this, tell me and I’ll stop,” you said. He nodded and you put a hand on his chest, unzipping his coat. Your hand rested on his lower stomach, just over his belt and he shut his eyes.

“Wait,” he said. You sat back and he sat forward in his seat again, pressing his hand over his stomach. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” you said. You kissed his cheek and sat back in your seat, sticking your arms in your jacket. “Seriously, don’t over think it.”

“I want to. Shit I want to do all sorts of things with you in that backseat. But I need to show you something first and it’s better at home if you find out.”

“Okay,” you said. “Let’s go home then.”

Twenty minutes later the babysitter was gone and you were watching Jensen peel off his shirt in his bedroom, back to you. He dropped his jeans and kicked them aside, turning around in his boxer briefs. He started to pull them down when you shook your head.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“No. I think I’m wearing too many clothes is all.” You turned and took off your top, your face hot as you slipped off your leggings. You dropped them to the ground and straightened up, taking deep breaths. You’d been naked in front of your ex before plenty. But Jensen was just so damn handsome and his body was…

“Y/N,” said Jensen, close behind you but not touching you. “You okay?”

“Didn’t really think through the you seeing me basically naked thing,” you said. He lightly tapped your arm and you spun around, forcing your head up. 

“Basically naked you is hot,” he said, cupping your cheek. 

“I have a stomach,” you said.

“So do I,” he said, patting his own. “You are beautiful, Y/N. Believe me when I say it.”

You nodded and started to relax, Jensen tensing up again though.

“What did you want to show me?” you asked. He walked over to the bed and glanced at it. You took a seat and he shut his eyes, taking a beat before he pushed down his underwear. A thick pink scar ran over his skin and curled down to his leg.

“One of my arteries was damaged in my hip, leg, groin, whatever area, when part of the car kinda...went in me. It’s um...it’s fine now but the scar is…I’m kinda...self-conscious about it...”

“Can I?” you asked. He nodded and you reached out your hand, Jensen opening his eyes as you touched the end closest to his hip. You traced your finger over it and down, curving it back around and to the top of his thigh.

“I know it’s ugly but laser scar removal can be a bitch to deal with, especially down there. I-”

“I love it.”

“What?”

“Scars mean you survived. I’m really happy you survived so yeah, I love it. I don’t give a fuck if you have scars, Jensen. You’re so handsome and attractive and this is not ugly. This is part of you and nothing about you is ugly.”

“It’s not attractive though,” he said, putting his hand over it. You put yours over his and moved it aside.

“You’re standing in front of me naked and you think this scar is what I’m thinking about?” you asked. 

“I haven’t done this with someone new in almost twenty years,” he said. “I’m nervous.”

“Me too. But I meant what I said. It’s just a scar, Jensen. I got ‘em. You got ‘em. I’m attracted to you but that sure as shit ain’t why I like you.” You gently thumbed over the skin and he rested his hand on yours, tracing over it with you this time. “Come here.”

He sat down and you knelt up on your knees, cupping his cheek and kissing him. He sank back and moved towards the middle of the bed, never breaking apart from you. 

“Relax,” you said against his ear. “This is gonna be fun. I promise.”

“Can I take off your bra?” he asked. You nodded and he shook his head. “Why do I feel like I’m doing this for the first time?”

“It is the first time like this. So we’ll move at your speed, okay?”

“How do…” he said, shutting his eyes. He fisted his hands in the sheets and you wrapped your arms around him, Jensen resting his head on your shoulder. “I don’t want to...do certain things bother you?”

“Like…” you said, Jensen taking a deep breath. He lifted his head and looked at you, pursing his lips.

“Do things having to do with sex scare you? I don’t need details or why but with what happened to you I don’t want to frighten you or do something stupid.”

“You’re too sweet,” you said. You stroked his cheek and shook your head. “I’m okay. Trust me. I’ve probably done kinkier shit than you have.”

“Y/N.”

“I’m not scared of you, Ackles. I’ve had all the time in the world to work through that stuff. If you want to take off my bra and leave it at making out in bed naked, that’s fine. If you want to go further, that’s fine too. I’m not pushing you into anything. Ever. I literally can’t imagine being in your position. Take all the time-”

“Why…” he breathed out, resting his forehead against yours, hot breath fanning over your mouth. “Why are you so patient with me? You’re thirty. You could have anyone you want. Why would you want me?”

“Because you’re my best friend, Jensen. You’re the only one I do want.”

He leaned forward, hand sliding up to the back of your neck as he pressed his lips to yours. He slowly took charge of it and you let him, Jensen guiding you to lay back. You kept softly kissing him, matching his pace and cupping his face, running your fingers through his hair. A finger grazed your shoulder and then the other. You moved your arms out of the bra straps, reaching up for him again. You sat up as best you could, Jensen reaching behind you and undoing the clasp before tossing it aside. He didn’t move lower though, just kissed you lazily until he rolled back onto the mattress, pulling you to lay on top of him.

You shifted back and heard him groan when you nudged the tip of his cock. 

“Sorry,” you mumbled, Jensen shaking his head.

“Take off your underwear,” he murmured.

“Jensen I don’t like to have sex unless I’m on birth control. It’s just a-”

“Of course not. There are other things we can do if that’s okay?” he asked. You nodded and rolled to the side, shimmying out of your underwear. He slid down the bed and ran his hands up your thighs, a shiver trickling down your spine. 

“What are you thinking?” you breathed out.

“Wonder how you taste,” he said, licking his lips.

“Are you sure you want to?” you asked. He nodded and you returned it. He leaned down and spread your legs out, large hands sliding up and down your inner thigh, getting closer and closer each time. “What are you doing?”

“S’called foreplay sweetheart,” he said, hands gliding up over your hips and giving a gentle squeeze.

“Jesus Jensen. I was not expecting this from you.”

“Do you want me to stop?”

“Fuck no.” He smirked and inched his fingers closer and closer to you, teasingly leaving kitten kisses over your hip. Painfully slow he made his way down, dipping his head down and swiping his tongue over your clit. He was soft and gentle at first but he increased the pressure when your legs wrapped over his back.

His hands pinned your hips down to the bed, your own wandering to his hair and running through it. He was very good and when he sucked you fisted his short strands, Jensen doing it over and over while still working his tongue. 

Your legs squeezed him as your orgasm snuck up on you, sharp and powerful. You moaned when the feeling died down but Jensen didn’t let up for a beat.

“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck,” you said, another orgasm tearing through you. You yelped and threw a hand over your mouth, this one even better than the last. You breathed hard as Jensen finally pulled back, smirking as he pulled his hand away from your mouth. 

“Sorry. Couldn’t help myself,” he teased.

“I think you short circuited my brain,” you breathed out, staring at the ceiling. You giggled and he joined you, laying a hand over your waist. “How the fuck did you get me to come twice. That’s literally never happened outside of some alone time.”

“You find that groove, you stay in it,” he smirked. “You taste excellent by the way.”

“You’re a fucking dirty boy under that soft little face and I’m kinda super hot for it,” you said. He chuckled and you sat up, staring down at him. “Can I return the favor?”

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “Do you want a condom?”

“You clean?” you asked. He nodded and you smiled. “You okay with me not using one?”

“Yeah. Just don’t expect me to last long.”

You smiled and kissed him before you scooted down the bed. He was hard and leaking a bit of precome when you gently wrapped a hand around the base of him. He tensed up and you flicked your gaze up but he took a deep breath.

“I’m good,” he said. You licked your lips and ducked your head, taking the head of him into your mouth. He breathed harder and you stilled, waiting until he was calmer before you moved your tongue around. You didn’t stroke the rest of him, merely gave him a few teasing touches while you bobbed an inch or two, lightly hollowing your cheeks. He let out soft sighs and quiet grunts that spurred you to take more of him in. You moved lower and faster, swiping your tongue over his head. He started to throb and you sucked hard, Jensen groaning before he came. You pulled off after a moment and swallowed, wiping off your lip with your thumb and sucking it clean. 

“How was that?” you smirked, Jensen throwing his arm over his face. He didn’t seem to be enjoying his post-orgasmic glow though and you tried pulling his arm away. “Hey, you okay? Was it too much?”

“No,” he said, flopping his arm down and staring up at you. “It felt great. I just...I came so fucking early.”

“When’s the last time you had a blowjob?”

“Well over six months. I still-”

“Coming early ain’t a bad thing to me,” you said. “Shit I came after like five minutes which doesn’t happen like, ever. I just care that you had fun.”

“I did,” he said, a smile coming onto his face. “I liked that little under the tip thing you were doing with your tongue.”

“Never met a man that could last longer than a few minutes with that little trick,” you said. You lay down and wrapped your arms around him, Jensen brushing his nose against yours. 

“How many guys you been with? If that’s okay.”

“Three including you,” you shrugged. “Highschool party. The ex which was off and on for a long time. You. You got the nicest dick, that’s for sure.”

He chuckled and you kissed the tip of his nose, Jensen pulling you closer.

“You?”

“Oh I’ve not been with any guys,” he chuckled. 

“Go gentler on the dick than you think you should. They go nuts for it,” you said.

“I will keep that in mind for when it happens,” he laughed. “Pretty much all of my girlfriends in adulthood. Seven or so I’d say.”

“I don’t know why I expected that number to be higher.”

“More than that have tried. I’m not really the hook up guy. Sure I acted like that guy when I was younger but never really was him, you know?”

“You’ve always been sweet. Probably even as a dumb teenage boy, weren’t you.”

“I was a very dumb teenage boy,” he chuckled. “But I didn’t really get in trouble. Flirted with that line once or twice but you know. Teenagers are idiots. I bet you were a good girl, weren’t you.”

“I spent most of my teenage years with my mom sick and then after that I was...I wasn’t really the girl that got involved with that stuff besides some parties.”

“Was it cancer? Your mom?” he asked.

“Radiation poisoning. She’d been accidentally exposed as a little kid on her family’s farm when she got into some supplies she shouldn’t have. Hit her harder later on in life. She’d known since she was a kid that dying young was a strong possibility. It wasn’t easy but I felt kinda better that her first husband Dan was like, maybe waiting for her or some shit. I don’t know. Ray and I used to say that to each other sometimes.”

“Why don’t you talk to Ray anymore?” he asked quietly, playing with a piece of your hair over your shoulder.

“It wasn’t like we had a fight or anything. I just got older, moved out for a nanny job at eighteen. He started to date again and he has this nice little life now with his wife and kids. The idea of a father scared me.”

“My dad’s nice if you ever want to talk to a dad sometime,” he said. He smiled before he cocked his head, his lips parting. “They have no idea I’m dating you.”

“It’s not been that long,” you said.

“I should tell them, before they hear from some tabloid or friend or something,” he said.

“Do you think they’ll have a problem with me?” you asked, his head shaking. “I mean, I’d be leery of me if I were them. I sound like a fucking movie plot. The young nanny gets with the older single dad.”

“My parents want me to be happy again and you make me happy for the first time in a very long time. There’s no way that they couldn’t love you,” he said. You nodded and closed your eyes, covers pulled up over top of the two of you after a few moments. You felt a kiss on your lips and you smiled, inching closer to him. “Thanks. For tonight.”

“You too, Jensen. It was perfect.”

_______

A/N: Read Part 7 here!

[ghost-ghost-baby]

Bad habits (alpha!shoto x omega!reader x alpha!izuku poly imagine)

Warnings: self harm (cutting) mentioned, nothing too graphic tho, swearing, angst, hurt and comfort??? Omegaverse, reader tries to b sneaky, it doesn’t work, Shoto and deku know this bitch too well, protectiveness?? Shoto is had in a crisis, Izuku's hero complex goes bbbbrrrr

Summary: reader does a big sh relapse Nd tries to hide it from their mates,,,,, it does not work!

Word count: 1.1k

Not proof read (if u wanna beta for me pls hmu I hate editing)

You were going to meet your mates after work, something you’d been looking forward to all day. Your mental health hadn’t been the greatest lately, in fact it was probably worse than it had been in years, and you’d fallen back into more unsavoury habits to deal with it. But that wasn’t the point! You were seeing your mates! It didn’t matter that you were tired, or that your thighs stung with every step, you were seeing them! The three of you met outside your apartment, Izuku jumping up and down with excitement the second you came into view, and the alpha ran to you when you were a couple of feet away, Shoto telling him to be careful as he followed. Izuku wasn’t careful, your thighs collided with his as your alpha swept you up into a hug, and you had to bury your face in his neck to stop yourself whimpering. It was fine, you were fine.

“Y/n, I missed you! You haven’t been texting me as much, are you okay?” Izuku set you down so he could pepper your face with kisses, and you whined at him until he pressed a kiss to your lips. Then Shoto caught up to the two of you, and he frowned at you until you pulled away from Izuku to greet him.

“Sho! Missed you!” You held your arms out for a hug, and Shoto quickly pulled you to him, pressing a kiss to your forehead before he rested his chin on the top of your head, and his eyes fixed on Izuku. Izuku nodded, grabbing your key out of your bag and unlocking the door, with Shoto carrying you in a moment later.

The lock clicked into place and Shoto gently set you down, him and Izuku both turning to face you, and you felt your anxiety kick back in.

“You smell like blood, why?” Shoto’s deadpan tone didn’t match the concern that laced his face, and you let out a nervous laugh as you reached up to scratch the back of your neck. Fuck. Fuckity fuck fuck fuck. You had to come up with some kind of excuse!

“It’s uh- just that time… of the month?” You couldn’t meet their eyes, and Shoto just let out a disappointed sigh that cut right through you.

“Y/n, we can tell when you’re lying!” Izuku crossed his arms over his chest, and their stares made it even harder to come up with an excuse.

“Okay- yeah- but only because it’s nothing to worry about! I was just cooking earlier and I accidentally sliced my finger!” You bit your lip as you waited for a response. Technically you weren’t meant to cook, your mates insisted you could get hurt, so maybe that would be enough to distract them-

“Funny, your scent still smells the way it does when you’re lying.”

“Yeah! And your hands are completely uninjured, tell us the truth, Y/n, please!” Izuku grabbed your hands and you winced when he stepped closer, automatically shifting from foot to foot, completely forgetting why you had to be careful until-

Your jeans rubbed too much on your thighs, and horror shot through you when you realised the cuts had reopened, and judging by the scared look on your mates faces, the jig was up.

“Y/n… what happened? Was there a villain attack? Did someone hurt you?” Izuku had tears in his eyes now, and your own gaze darted between him and Shoto before you finally had the guts to speak.

“F-Funny story, actually! You remember that uh- habit I had when the three of us first started- started courting?” Izuku’s grip on your hands tightened at your words, and the temperature in the room dropped as Shoto’s quirk acted up like it always did when this topic came up. “I may have uh- accidentally- fallen… back… into it… kinda…”

“Go- go to the bathroom, now! Shoto, get your quirk under- under control before you follow us, Y/n is already stressed and they can’t be worrying about calming you down as well.” Izuku went right into hero mode, the alpha turning you around and all but marching you to the bathroom, lifting you to sit on the counter when you reached it.

“Pants off.”

“I-Izuku! That’s so-“ You stuttered, only to be interrupted when your alpha growled.

“Pants off. Now. I- I need to see how bad it is and- and make sure it’s dressed properly.” Izuku’s scent was overwhelming, quickly filling the room and suddenly you were just… too tired to fight about it.

“I- okay…” you quickly undid the buttons on your jeans, carefully pulling the garment down over your hips and thighs, and quickly covering as much of yourself as you could with your shirt while Izuku finished pulling them off, and you pouted when he just dumped them on the floor. You chewed on your bottom lip as Izuku surveyed the damage, most of your thighs were covered in the flat, light scars you’d had for years, but the part closer to your hip was covered in wounds ranging from two weeks old to from just the day before, the fresh ones oozing blood at a rather leisurely pace.

“This has- has been going on for a while, you didn’t- say- say anything?” Izuku busied himself grabbing the disinfectant and bandages, and you could only shrug and avoid his eyes.

“Y/n, he asked you a question.” Shoto’s voice startled you so bad you jumped, accidentally kicking Izuku from where he was trying to clean your injuries, and he couldn’t help but let out a growl at the impact.

“Sorry, Zuku, and I don’t know I just… didn’t wanna bother you guys, ya know? You’ve been working really hard and- and it was just meant to be- a one time thing.” Your words came out strained as the sting from the disinfectant kicked in, and both your alpha’s winced when your scent took on the sour tone that meant you were in distress.

“I know, baby, I know, you’re doing so good!” Izuku cooed, leaning forward to kiss you before he got back to his task. “Relapse is- is a normal and expected part of- of recovery! And- And it doesn’t take away from your- your progress! But Y/n, we’re your mates, you need to tell us if you’re feeling down, at least, okay?”

“We could have a code word, if that’s easier?” Shoto finally piped up, and you nodded in response, relaxing as Izuku applied gauze to your thighs, at least the pressure got rid of the sting from the antiseptic.

“See, Y/n? We’d never be mad at you for something like this, we just wanna help you.” Izuku pulled you into a hug once he was finally satisfied that you were taken care of, and you just let your head rest on his shoulder, arms loosely wrapping around his waist as he carried you back to your room, and you smiled when you realised Shoto had already set everything up for your movie night. You really were lucky, huh?

[thestarrynightslover]

How to Say I Love You

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Word count: 2,582

Warnings: Smut implied.

Summary:  One day, Jay takes it upon himself to be an extra-cute boyfriend. The reason? It takes (y/n) a while to find out.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the One Chicago shows, or its characters, also not associated with it in any way or know anyone involved with it.

A/N: Posting super late because the day was hard. So, just some more Jay fluff to brighten our days. Hope you like it!

(y/n) = (your name) (y/l/n) = (your last name) (y/n/n) = (your nickname)

| masterlist |

As soon as you woke up, you felt light kisses being pressed to all of your very exposed skin, and an inevitable smile came to your lips.

“Good morning, princess.” Jay whispered in your ear with a husky voice.

“Good morning for you too, baby.” You answered him while bringing his face closer to yours. On that movement, before you could kiss him, you caught a glance of your bedside clock. “Oh my God, Jay! Look at the time! I thought we’d agreed to get as much sleep as we could after last night!” You quickly reprehended him. “Or have you forgotten that both of us still have to go to work today?” You asked, trying to sound annoyed at him when the most you managed to do was breathe out was a moan, as he nibbed your earlobe.

“Oh, I know how much you like sleeping, babygirl. But I know that there are a few things you’d give up your sleep for.” He stated in a very sexy tone.

“And what exactly makes you think that you’re one of those things?” You teased your boyfriend, hoping he’d respond to it like you thought he would.

“Ah, just a little something,” he teased back while slowly putting his hand between your legs, not even bothering to lift the hem of the shirt you were wearing, “like this.”

“Oh, Jay…” And, just like that, you were completely fine with waking up early.

                                                          ---

Throughout the day, you just couldn’t keep the smile off your face, as your boyfriend took it upon himself to be the cutest person in the world. Why? You had no idea. All you knew was that he'd gotten the day off but, since you couldn't the same, he'd decided to go to work nonetheless.

His romantics for no apparent reason started with a bouquet of your favorite flowers and a note that read:

“Will you be my lunch date today? *blinking face*

P.S.: 12:00 - 13:00 is all I have. Sorry, doll :(

Meet me at our spot?

⎼ Your bae.”

He used bae. If he wasn’t so cute, and if you didn’t love him so much, you would have cringed at the choice, and he knew it. Ah, that man...

A few hours after that, you went to meet Jay for lunch at your spot ⎼ which was one of the benches along the Riverwalk, where you’d first met ⎼, absolutely decided on calling him out for being so mushy. But, as you walked closer towards him, you could see that your boyfriend was holding a picnic basket in one hand, and a bottle of champagne in the other, and, as corny as that was, you couldn’t help but grin. 

“Drinking on duty now, detective?” You asked, raising your eyebrow at him.

“Nope. This one’s without alcohol. And, trust me, you’ll like it.” He told you, a sweet smile on his lips.

“Hum, maybe... But I wouldn’t really mind if it was bad either.” You half-whispered at Jay.

“Oh no?” He asked you with a smirk this time.

“No. The company makes up for anything else.” You said while moving to kiss him.

“Geez, babe, you're such a dork!" He said, making fun of you after the kiss was over.

"Really? That's what you're going with?" You, the dork? Big joke.

"What else can I say if it's the truth?" Jay asked you through his lashes, an innocent expression in-face.

"Look who's talking!" You said while rolling your eyes.

Not long after that, he put an end to your little banter. Saying that he didn't wanna spend another second of the few moments the two of you had until the evening arguing was an understatement. You agreed, even though you knew that both of you secretly enjoyed the bickerings as well as you did everything else.

Later, on that same day, when you were about to leave work, you decided to call your boyfriend.

"Hey, babe." He answered, on the fourth ring, voice letting on some tiredness.

"Hey there, handsome! I'm already leaving work, think I’mma go swim a little. Unless… There's a chance you're getting off a little earlier yourself?" You tried your luck, thinking about making him relax a little before you two left for dinner.

"Uh… Sorry, babe, I don't think I'll be able to." A deep sigh. Something was wrong.

"Jay. Is everything okay?" Another sigh. Shit.

"It's nothing for you to worry about, baby. Just a pain-in-the-ass case we can't seem to solve. When all I wanted to do was be home with you." He confessed.

"Huh. Now, tell me, who's the dork?" You heard his muffled laugh over the phone.

"I am. You know it. I know it. Everyone who knows us knows it." At that, you were the one who giggled. "And, believe me, I bear the title with pride." More laughing, from both of you this time.

"Okay, then… So, um, is there anything I can do? Maybe we cancel that dinner reservation?"

"No! No, not at all! You just… Go do your swimming and don't worry about me, okay?" Jay sounded a bit weird this time, but you brushed it off, thinking that it was just the stress of the day.

"Okay…" You replied, still unconvinced. 

"Alright, I gotta go now. Love you."

"Okay, bye. Love you too. Be safe!"

"Always, baby." With that, he hung up quickly, which he never did ⎼ always dragging the conversations for as long as he could. But, once again, you decided to do what your boyfriend told you to and not worry about it.

It was already a bit into the evening and you were stretching your body to leave the swimming pool, when you saw him. Jay. So you got out and walked over to him.

"Fancy meeting you here, miss (y/l/n)." He greeted innocently.

"Well, this is a surprise. Yet another one. On the same day." You said, just to let him know that his weird behaviors weren't going by unnoticed.

"Ah, you know what they say… Gotta keep the relationship interesting!" Ha, ha. He was up to something. So you just gave him a suspicious look. To which he answered with a huge smile, saying: "What?"

"Nothing. Nothing besides the fact that you're up to something. What is it?"

"Oh. My. God." Jay said emphatically, faking offense. "I'm offended. You think that poorly of me?"

"What do you mean?" You asked him, a bit confused this time.

"You really think that I can't just try and brighten my princess's day?" He said, walking closer to you this time.

"Well, I guess that I wouldn't object to that, but what I'm saying is tha-" Before you could finish your sentence, he was pulling you towards him, pressing your bodies on a tight embrace and kissing you passionately. 

"Oh no, Jay, you should let me go! I'm all wet!" You squeal out as Jay keeps holding you up in the air against his firm abdomen.

"I don't mind." He told you with a shrug of shoulders. "I'm used to having you like this." He, then, whispers in your ear and you can feel his smirk, as he kisses your neck.

"Jay!" You hissed in fake disapproval. "We're in public! You can't be saying these things to me in public!"

"Sorry, baby. But you know that I just can't help myself around you." He tells you, deliberately taking his time. At that, you just throw back your head in laughter. "Besides, it doesn't seem to me like you're feeling all that bothered with my actions…"

"But I am!" You said assertively. But then you remembered your conversation from earlier and asked him, in a softer tone: "Hey, um, how did the case go? Are you still feeling up for the dinner thing?" As soon as the words left your mouth, you watched Jay shift his entire demeanor.

"Yeah! We're definitely still going! And, as I told you before, the case was just a pain in the ass, nothing more." He sounded nervous. Weird. Like he was hiding something.

"Jay…"

"Let's just go, okay? Cause we still need to get ready for dinner. I already put your stuff in the duffel bag. My car's right outside." Jay told you quickly, like he didn't wanna give you time to make any conclusions.

"Okay, then…"

                                                           ---

“C’mon, (y/n/n)! We’re running late!” You heard your boyfriend shouting for you to come out of your shared bedroom.

“Hey! Don’t you dare to rush me! Not when you’re the reason I’m running late in the first place!” You sharply answered, stepping out into the living room whilst putting your earring on. “Besides, that place we’re going is just too fancy. I need to look perfect.” You added more calmly, only now realizing how Jay was staring at you. “What? Is something wrong?”

“Wha- wrong? No! No!” He quickly assured you and closed the distance between the two of you. “You already look perfect. Every single day.”

“What? Jay, I’m serious!” You pouted, giving him an annoyed glare.

“I am too! You look gorgeous, baby.” He told you with that glorious smile of his. “And, really, there’s just no place on the planet that could make you look any less gorgeous.”

“Okay, now you’re just trying to get me to hurry up!” You accused, hitting him with considerable strength in the chest.

“Ouch! That hurt! And, yes, I am trying to hurry you up! Because we have a reservation!” He yelled at you in response. If it was any other time, you would’ve argued with him, of course. But even you had to admit he was right, you were on the clock.

“Okay, okay! I’m just gonna grab my purse and we’ll go!” You shouted back, already from the bedroom.

After that, the two of you managed to leave your apartment and get to the restaurant on time, due to Jay promising the cab driver a doubled pay if he went faster.

As soon as you arrived, though, you saw it was worth it. You still had no clue of what got in your boyfriend’s head to take you out on this kind of date for no apparent reason like that, especially after everything else he’d already done, but you obviously weren’t about to complain either.

 The maître walked both of you two to a table on the upper floor of the establishment, it had an amazing view of the city and it was a pretty reserved space. So, right after you'd placed your orders and been left alone, you half-squealed at Jay:

"Oh. My. God." Your smile was wide and your eyes were shining. "This place is incredible, babe!" He looked at you with devotion, clearly amused by your reaction.

"I know right? I'm really glad we got to come here." He stated, his whole behavior letting you know that he was just as impressed.

And, like that, the evening flew by and you caught yourself stifling yawn after yawn.

"Baby, you’re not too desperate to go home, are you? Because there's still one thing I wanna show you." Your boyfriend said, pulling you by your hand to get up. Then, he guided you to that part where you'd been able to view most Chicago, earlier in the night.

"Wow," you said, leaning against the balcony to see the details, "this really is great, babe." When you’d walked past this part you wondered about why they hadn't put any tables there, only a small couch, but now you knew. They didn't want to make that space ⎼ that landscape ⎼ prisoner of one couple, or one family, that would most likely stay there the entire night.

"It is." He agreed with you.

"You know, I hadn't brought it up yet, because I thought that you'd eventually tell me on your own, but you've been acting a little weird the whole day. This morning in bed, the flowers, then the picnic lunch, picking me up at swimming, and now this… You didn't sound too good on that call either, and I gotta admit that when you said we were going out for a fancy dinner, I didn't think it'd be here, where it's practically impossible to get a reservation. So, just… Talk to me, Jay."

"(y/n/n)... Would you even believe me if I told you that that's what I've been preparing to do the whole day?" He asked you with a shy smile.

"Will you be mad at me if I say no?" You asked, a bit apprehensively. He just laughed.

"Nah, not really." He told you jokingly. "But I have." He said, more serious this time. “Baby, you’re the best thing that ever happened to me.” He started telling you.

“Jay-” You whispered nervously, sort of anticipating what was about to happen.

“No, just- just please let me finish. I need you to understand how important you are to me, princess. Hell, I know that words aren’t really my strongest suit, but you deserve to know that you’re my light, my lifeline, my happiness… You’re my everything, (y/n/n). My entire world. And, because of you, now I think that it is actually okay to dream, to hope for a better future, for a future. That’s why I wanna ask you, tonight, to be my future, just like you already are my present.” At that moment you couldn’t keep the tears off of your face anymore, and you would’ve jumped him right then if he hadn’t gotten down on one knee. “Will you marry me, (y/n) (y/l/n)?” He asked you with a timid smile and teary eyes of his own. As you took in the man you loved, kneeled before you, holding an open box with the diamond ring you’d recognized as being his mother’s, you just stood there crying, not managing to say anything. “B- baby? Please say something.” Jay spoke again, letting out a nervous choked laugh. So you forced yourself to answer him.

“Oh m- my God, yes!!” You squealed out.

“Yes?!?” He repeated what you said, still on the ground.

“Of course, yes!!!” You confirmed, pulling him up to kiss you. While at it, your boyfriend, now fiancé, almost dropped the small velvet box he was holding.

“Okay,” he started, chuckling, after the two of you parted a little, “let me put this thing on your finger before you back down!”

“Ha, ha. As if I was going to! You’re only in a hurry because you’re scared you’ll drop your mom’s ring.” You bickered a little, letting him know that you recognized the jewelry, to which he responded with a bright smile, saying:

“It’s your ring now, princess. And, trust me, she’d love you almost as much as I do if she were still here.” He told you, shining eyes meeting yours, as he slipped the stunning piece in your finger.

“Jay.” You breathed out as the tears resurfaced in your eyes. “It is so beautiful…” You told him looking down at the ring you had in-hand. “And… You really mean that?”

“100%, princess. If I’m being honest, there are a lot of times when you actually remind me of her…” He said, tearing up a little.

“Awww, babe...” You said throwing your arms around him again.

And that’s how you two stayed. Just holding each other, under a very starry night in Chicago. More than ready to start walking down that new road together.

[buckyswintersoldiermask]

Starting over

Bucky Barnes x reader

Bucky Masterlist

Part 1: Reunited

Summary: after going back to give Bucky a chance to explain himself, you decide to start over.

Word Count: 1.3k

Warnings: mentions of lying and divorce

A/N: I was going to make this into one, but I felt it would be too cramped. So here’s part 2.

Italicized words are flashbacks

You laid on the bed taking in your encounter with Bucky. Thinking about whether you should actually go see him again. Let him explain himself. Did he even deserve that? After what he put you through?

“Wendy, I don’t even know if I want to go.”

“You want answers don’t you?” You nod, realizing you’re going to have to go see him again if you want answers.

“I’ll go after lunch, don’t wanna seem too eager.”

“Do what you need to do so you can get some answers.”

You spent the rest of your morning staring at the clock. You tried not to but you really wanted answers. Why now? Why does he want to talk now? What has changed in the last 3 years?

You spent the whole morning contemplating if this would open old wounds. Should you do it? Who would benefit? Him or you? You kept thinking If you should do it right up until you were at his apartment complex.

You were standing outside his door, you prepared yourself to knock again. It was easier this time, you knocked louder this time, ready to demand answers.

He was taking a long time to get to the door so you texted him;

I’m at your door. Open up

Within seconds he opened the door, “I didn’t think you’d still have my number.”

“Well I’m a nice person, James.”

“I know. You were the nicest person I had in my life.” He said, staring into your eyes, which he loved so much, and missed.

“Okay. So I’m here, I’m gonna listen.” You said, interrupting his staring. You led you to the couch and he sat on the other end.

“I want to apologize for how I was during our marriage.”

“You weren’t terrible the whole time.” You said, recalling the times he was a good husband.

“I know, but I wasn’t good to you towards the end like I was in the beginning. I started lying, coming home late, and wasn't fully in our marriage,” his gaze shifted to your eyes, “(y/n), I am so sorry and I know sorry is not enough. I can’t take back how I treated you, but everyday I wish I could. I wish I would’ve been honest with you.”

“What do you mean?”

“Why I was lying, coming home late and I became a different person.”

“What are you talking about?” You were very confused about where this conversation was going. How could he justify his lying? Never being home? Acting weird?

“(y/n), are you familiar with HYDRA?”

“A little bit, why?”

“I worked for HYDRA, well, I was brainwashed against my will. But I got free from that brainwashing, with the help from Steve and other Wakandians.” He explained to you as you sat there in utter shock. You always wondered about Bucky’s past. He never really talked about it, and said it wasn’t nice to talk about or remember. Now he’s telling you it.

“You were- Bucky, I’m so sorry. That sounds awful.” You apologized, grabbing his hand in yours, “so is this why you lied?”

He shook his head no and continued, “the lying started because I was a potential target and I did not want you to get hurt because of me.”

“(y/n), I think we’d be better off if we divorced.”

“Buck, where is this coming from?” You asked, tears forming in your eyes.

“What went wrong? We were fine, then we weren’t. Is this my fault?”

“It’s not your fault, doll. I think this divorce will be good for both of us.” He said, his hands resting on your shoulders.

Your eyes widened in surprise, “Bucky, you’re telling me you lied to protect me?”

“I couldn’t risk you getting hurt, the late nights, the lying, was all because I was a potential target and I did not want you to know what I did when I wasn’t home so you wouldn’t be a target too.”

“So you divorced me, so we wouldn’t be together and so I wouldn’t be a target and you wouldn’t be hurting me anymore.” You replied, putting the pieces together.

You were gathered in the room along the table were you, Bucky and your lawyers. This was it, the signing of the papers. You’d officially be divorced from him.

“Bucky, are you sure you want to do this? End it all?” You sniffled.

“It’s for the best. It’ll be good for both of us.” He replied as you stepped out to get some air. Leaving him, your lawyer and his lawyer alone. While he was alone he mumbled to himself, “this will be good for you (y/n), I can’t hurt you anymore.”

You came back in composed and ready to sign. The lawyers confirmed that this is what you both wanted, then handed you the papers to sign. Bucky went first and then slid over the paper to you. The room was silent as you both signed your names on paper which would declare you both divorced. You gave the paper to your lawyer and got up looking Bucky in the eye; “So our 6 years together. What was it? Do you regret it? Do you regret marrying me?,” you took a deep breath, fixing your shirt, “goodbye, James.”

“You went through enough by me alone, I didn’t want my life and occupation to ruin your life.”

“But.. why now? Why not then?”

“You deserved space after everything. So I waited, I waited a long time to see you again,” he paused, “you haven’t changed a bit.” He said, smiling ear to ear.

Everything was starting to make sense. Bucky being the star husband he was and then changing because he wanted to protect you. But with his lying past you had to make sure.

Almost fully convinced you wondered,“How do I know you’re not lying to me again?”

Bucky took out a Manila folder labeled “Confidential information” and handed it to you. You opened it up to see a picture of Bucky in uniform and a picture of him as The Winter Soldier.

“This is my file from SHIELD, what they had on me.” He explained, as you flipped through the pictures and documents.

“I don’t expect you to forgive me (y/n), but I am not lying to you. I’m done lying to you. I never want to lie to you again.”

You sat there speechless, Bucky never was trying to be a terrible person. He was trying to protect you. All those years.

“If you want, you can take it home and look over it.” He offered, watching as you examined it.

“I don’t regret it.” Bucky blurted out, causing you to look up from the documents, “what?”

“I don’t regret marrying you. I never did. Hurting you and divorcing you was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” Bucky recalled the day where you both officially became divorced, “you called me ‘James’ and not Bucky that day.”

“I understand why you did it,” you paused to wipe your eyes, “I hated you for so long.”

“You had every right to hate me, I was terrible to you.” You intertwined your hand with his, “thank you. Thank you for trying to protect me.”

“We all try to protect what we love the most.”

You and Bucky sat there for a while. You tell him about your life after 3 years and vice versa. You found out that he’s retired from the hero life and works as a mechanic. You also told him how much you’ve gone up at the company where you work.

“I always knew you’d be the boss, you’re built for it.” He smiled.

“Thank you, but you, you have your own mechanic company?”

“‘Barnes Repair Shop’ finest repair shop in Brooklyn.” He exaggerated, making you laugh. Bucky’s face went serious after that joke, making the atmosphere quite thick.

“Why did your mood just drop?”

“I want to ask you something.”

“Ask it. I mean you’ve told me just about everything. What’s one more question?”

Bucky took a deep breath before asking his initial question from yesterday, “(y/n), can we start over?”

“Yes, Bucky, we can start over.”

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[whimsicallyreading]

An angsty one-shot for your day. I stayed up way too late to write this.

CW- drinking

Aelin keeps the letters stacked neatly on her desk.

Each letter is stamped, addressed, and ready to mail. In tiny marks on the back, she writes the date every individual one was written. The envelopes are his favorite shade of green. A deep, pine color that she’d painstakingly scoured every stationary shop to find.

Delicately, Aelin seals the latest envelope and adds it to the growing pile.

My Love,

It’s almost winter here in Orynth. I know it’s your favorite season and you are probably sad to miss out, so I took a Polaroid of the clouds coming in over the staghorns for you.

Do you remember how we’d sit in front of Mistward every year and watch the first snow storm come in over the peeks? We would drink hot chocolate and talk for hours. About our families, our futures, anything and everything. It’s still one of my favorite traditions.

In fact, it’s where I am right now. Writing this letter to you. Just because you are overseas doesn’t mean you get to bail out. I bought two hot chocolates, but I suppose I’ll have to drink yours for you. What a shame.

Writing to Rowan was her weekly tradition since he got deployed. No matter how busy life got, every Friday she wrote him two full pages front to back. Whether she got to sit at her desk or had to scribble against the rusty bench at the bus stop, every inch was covered in her hand writing.

That was her personal rule. They had to be handwritten. Aelin felt it meant more that every piece of the letter was entirely from her. So she keeps a collection of colored pens handy for whenever the urge to speak to her husband grows to be too much.

At the bottom of the last page, next to her signature, Aelin always kisses the paper with red lipstick. Maybe it’s cheesy, but it’s the same shade she wore at their wedding.

You could see the ghosts of the color along his jawline in their favorite photos together. His beaming smile, the smudges of red on his face and the collar of his white dress shirt. A remnant from the happiest day of her life she thought would bring him comfort.

My love,

Winter is here! It’s so cold outside. You would say it’s this frigid every year, but it just feels different this time. Maybe it’s because you aren’t hear to snuggle up with and your side of the bed is empty? You were always so warm.

I keep your slippers by the couch. They are ridiculously huge on my feet, but I swear they still feel like you just walked in them. Your warmth is still there.

You would laugh if you saw me hobbling around the apartment in them. My toes slide all over the place. Truthfully, your feet are atrociously large, dear- Still they remind me of you, so I love them.

Aelin gets home late from work that night.

Humiliated tears sting her cheeks, even as she rubs them away. The feeling of that creep, Cairn’s, hands lingering on her ass.

She was used to fending off handsy patrons. What bothered Aelin is that when she complained to her boss, Erawan, he publicly berated her for instigating the customers.

None of the other waitresses would meet her eye when she looked for back up. Grave, the bartender, sniggered through the entire dressing down. Aelin could still feel their eyes on her skin as Erawan accused her of being provocative.

Rowan would have demanded she quit the job. He would have marched down to the bar and broken Cairn’s face. Possibly even held him back so Aelin could do it herself.

Aelin needs the money, though. Rowan’s accounts were frozen due to some stupid technicality at the bank. Without her paycheck, she would lose the apartment.

Sniffling, Aelin slides her feet into Rowan’s slippers and plops at her desk. It isn’t Friday yet, but she’s desperate to speak to him.

As her hand flows across the paper, Aelin knows she won’t describe the days events to him. He’s under enough stress without her work drama adding to his worries.

My love,

Yulemas is next week. Aedion is in Caraverre with Lysandra and our new nephew. Lorcan and Elide are going up from Perranth to stay with them, but the roads are so frozen in Orynth I may just stay here this year.

Besides, work is busy right now. They need someone to man the place for the people with nowhere to go for the holidays.

Maybe I’ll host a little celebration at the bar. Like we did that one year when we got stuck in the Hostel in Rifthold. We made the best of a bad situation, and it was the first time you told me you loved me. I think I’d like to relive a little of that this year.

I miss you. Please come home.

Aelin lays in her bed the night before Yulemas and sobs.

Ugly, guttural noises spill from her chest and she soaks their pillows with tears. The newest envelope is clutched against her chest, and the building stacks mock her from their spot across the room.

Her heart is so raw. Aelin knew it was a bad idea to count the letters, but there was so many. Curiosity got the better of her, and now she was bleeding for her mistake.

Fifty-six.

A full year of letters she hadn’t been able to send.

Rowan had only ever written her twenty before he was declared missing in action.

A year ago, she’d been hanging bobbles and decorating a tree knowing her husband only had a few weeks left of his tour.

Aelin had painted a welcome home banner, and her whole family made plans to come and spend the holiday with the soon-to-be-reunited couple.

She had his slippers waiting by the door. Rowan’s favorite blanket was laundered and folded on his side of the bed in case he wanted to lay down. Aelin had it on good authority that the bed would be one of the first places they visited when he arrived. Emerys had even given her a mixture of their favorite hot chocolate to make.

Everything was perfectly in place for his return.

That’s what when the soldiers arrived at her door and her world fell apart.

Lorcan came home a week later. He hugged Elide and she cried into his shoulder. Happy tears. So unlike the ones Aelin had been shedding. Her friend beamed ear-to-ear, as the love of her life gathered her into his arms and squeezed.

It was a touching sight, but Aelin could feel the hot knife being twisted in her chest. Elide’s happiness caused her physical pain, and it made her feel so selfish. She didn’t begrudge Lorcan his life, or Elide her joy- Aelin just missed her own husband.

Elide and Lorcan spent Yulemas together. Kissing and holding hands. Lysandra finally announced her pregnancy. Aedion’s expression when he opened the box with the baby onesie inside was priceless. Her cousin whooped and hollered, almost dancing with the prospect of becoming a father.

Aelin smiled. She gave her congratulations and celebrated with her family. They hugged, and laughed. Aedion took care to include her in everything, and she played her part even as she tried to ignore the concerned looks her family exchanged behind her back.

Aelin made it to lunch before she couldn’t take it anymore.

Fenrys was the one to find her having a panic attack on the bathroom floor. She hadn’t even known it was a panic attack. Aelin just assumed the pain of losing her soulmate was finally killing her. The tightening of her chest and the body aches felt enough like a heart attack to be convincing.

He gathered Aelin in his arms and counted breaths with her. His twin brother Connal was lost in the same fight where Rowan had gone down. Fen had seen the whole thing from the cockpit of his plain, and nothing he did could’ve saved them.

He shared his pain, and for the first time Aelin felt like someone understood her.

Fenrys let her lean on him as they excused themselves from the celebrations. They drove to some bar in Caraverre and spent the rest of the day wallowing over whiskey.

Aedion came to collect their drunken asses later that evening. Worry etched into every line of his kind face. It only made her feel ashamed that she’d rained all over their happy day.

He was going to be a father, and she’d forced him to spend his time fretting over her instead of reveling in that news.

Now here she was a year later. Aelin wasn’t going to subject herself to that again. Couldn’t. She wouldn’t force her grief upon anyone else this year, either. Just because she was hurting didn’t mean that everyone else had to suffer with her.

So, as Yulemas Eve came, and before she could finally distract herself with work, Aelin pulled Rowan’s blanket over herself. She’d spritzed it with his cologne, donned his shirt, and pulled his socks over her feet. Aelin did everything she could to feel surrounded by him.

Then, alone in their bed, she watched as the clock ticked down to midnight.

Rowan,

Wherever you are, I hope my words reach you and that you know you aren’t alone. I wish with every ounce of my being that I could trade places with you- would give anything, just to know where you are.

It breaks my heart, to be without you. Every breath seems pointless. I lied in my last letter. The roads aren’t frozen. I’m not needed at work. No one really needs me to be around them. I just couldn’t spend another holiday surrounded by happy people when the other half of my heart is gone from me.

When you come home, I will feel like celebrating again. I’ll wrap my arms around you, and we can make up for lost time. Just please, don’t make me wait too much longer.

Merry Yulemas, my love. We will be together again one day.

Until then, I’ll keep on writing, only so long as you don’t yield.

Sincerely, your loving wife

Aelin

[omg-imagine]

Loopy

Pairing: Johnny Silverhand x female!V

Summary: V is a little loopy from her anesthesia, and Johnny finds it amusing.

Words: 1.7k

A/N: Requested by @thescorpionrodriguez. Hope you enjoy!

“Come on, V, wake the fuck up already.”

Silence. Johnny swears he could hear a pin drop.

V’s body remains lax on the bed; her eyes wound shut as if she were sound asleep. Slow and rhythmic, the rise and fall of her chest were calming, lulling. For once, she looks to be in peace, a rare moment for those who live and breathe in Night City.

She had been lucky. Extremely lucky. Two or three millimeters more to the right and the bullet that pierced her abdomen would have hit an organ. By some miracle, it missed anything vital and had exited out cleanly. It did fucking hurt judging by the sound of her agonizing groans, but here she was—still kicking, still alive.

And Johnny’s relieved that she was. They may not get along at times, but he genuinely cares for V. Hell, he would even consider her a good friend. She could call him a snarky asshole as often as she wants (and she does), yet he knows that deep down, she too has grown a soft spot for the rocker boy.

It’s been hours since the mission that went awry, and Johnny was getting pretty antsy. Vik had to put V down while he worked on repairing her cyberware. Nothing major, though the anesthesia should have certainly worn out by now. Much to Silverhand’s surprise, the ripperdoc wasn’t acting all too worried about it. He thinks V could use the sleep since he’s aware of how little she’s been getting.

Unfortunately, Johnny was all but a patient man. Bored out of his damn mind, he’s tired of roaming around the operating room, waiting and waiting for V to regain consciousness. Johnny’s more than ready to leave, perhaps grab a smoke afterward. He hasn’t gone this long without one lately, and he can’t enjoy one if V’s lying here, knocked out cold.

Nearly the rest of the day flies by, and the sun begins to set. That’s when he feels it; a spark—a familiar jolt of electricity emitting in the depths of V’s mind. Johnny manifests by her bedside, watching as her body finally stirs awake. That’s my girl, he silently praises, a flicker of a smile playing on his lips. V’s eyes flutter open, taking a minute to survey her surroundings before her line of sight lands on him.

“Well, look who decided to come back to life,” Johnny quips, leaning closer. “You doing alright, kid?”

V doesn’t respond. Rather, she bursts into a fit of giggles out of nowhere.

What the fuck?

Bewildered, Johnny glances everywhere but notices nothing amusing of the sort. “Care to share what you find so funny?”

“You’re too good looking to be my nurse,” V drawls, no doubt experiencing side effects from the anesthesia.

“I’m no nurse, princess, but thanks,” he corrects her. Then, it dawns on him. “You recognize me?”

She blinks at him blearily, the gears in her head turning as she tries to put a name to the face. “I dunno, should I?”

“It’s Johnny. Johnny Silverhand. Ring any bells?”

Again, V chuckles, a light-hearted tone that Johnny rarely hears, but they were sweet music to his ears when he does.

“Nope, zero bells. Are you like my husband or something?”

Johnny’s eyes widen. “Husband? Oh, no, honey. We ain’t even gone on a date yet. I’d say, think of us as partners-in-crime.”

“Wait!” V blurts out, gasping. “I remember you. You’re from that band—Samurai, right? God, I used to listen to your songs a lot as a kid.”

“Huh, you told me you’d never heard of Samurai,” Johnny recalls, slightly entertained at this point. “Didn’t peg you as a fangirl, V. I’m flattered.”

“So, can I… y’know, get your autograph?”

Just before Johnny could continue playing around with a loopy V, Viktor strolls in with Misty in tow, both delighted to find the merc out of her prolonged slumber. He lingers by the foot of her bed as Vik explains to V what happened, but she doesn’t seem to be processing it. She stares at him, dazed, and Johnny wonders when she’ll be back to normal.

“The effects should go away in a few hours,” Vik informs Misty once he’s examined V. She’s healing nicely and isn’t complaining much, yet that could be because of all the painkillers she was jacked with. “I’d say watch over V until she can stand on her own two feet without tripping. Other than that, she’s good to go.”

“Where are we going?” a clueless V asks, looking back and forth between the two. “Is Johnny coming?”

Misty furrows her brow at her. “Johnny?”

“Yeah, mister sex on legs over there,” she points eagerly, and Johnny smirks at that. “I’m not done talking to him yet.”

Vik shakes his head before reminding Misty of the engram residing within V’s psyche. “Oh, yeah. Silverhand. Uh, I guess he could come, too. Don’t really have much of a choice there, doll.”

The walk back to V’s apartment was a journey in itself. Lucky for her, she was pushed in a wheelchair throughout it all as Johnny stays visible for her benefit. They reached the door just before the skies turned completely dark, the warmth and comfort of the room being somewhat familiar to V.

Misty carefully moves her onto the bed, propping her up with pillows behind her back before smoothing out the blankets covering her legs. Johnny observes from a distance, quiet in his pondering. He’s never seen V this vulnerable before. She’s always been incredibly independent, not to mention stubborn as hell. She won’t accept anyone’s help unless it’s dire, and even then, she’s reluctant to do so.

“You must be starving,” Misty comments once V is settled. “How about I get you somethin’ to eat downstairs. Better food than what’s here, if there’s any. Hang tight for a bit, ’kay?”

Nodding, Misty then heads out of the room, the front door sliding shut when she’s gone, leaving V in the presence of Johnny yet once again. He glitches to sit by the edge of the mattress as V stares at him incredulously. Her eyes shone what he could best describe as innocence; she truly has no clue of what they’ve gone through together in the previous months.

“Can you sing me a song?”

Johnny narrows his gaze, a small chuckle rumbling in his throat at her deliriousness. “I don’t do concerts anymore.”

“Oh, come on!” V pouts, almost child-like in her ways. “Pleeease?”

“No,” he refuses sternly before an idea comes to mind. “How about you sing to me? Said you were a fan. Give me a performance, and maybe I’ll consider it.”

V does not hesitate. On cue, she starts to serenade Johnny with one of Samurai’s greatest hits, going as far as imitating the gruffness of his voice. Off-beat and lyrics garbled, V belts out the tune confidently and loud enough that her irritated neighbors began banging on the wall, yelling at her to quit it.

She ignores them, of course.

Meanwhile, Johnny’s having the time of his life. It was quite endearing to him, although embarrassing for V if she later finds out about this. Yet, he doesn’t stop her. He encourages her even further by singing along, not giving a fuck in the world.

At the end of the song, Johnny laughs heartily along with V, who had crawled closer to him. Their eyes meet for a moment that seems to last longer than it actually did. His mouth quirks up in a smile, the kind of smile that was reserved for her and her alone.

“You’re pretty cool, Silverhand,” V mumbles sleepily, touching the cold surface of his chrome arm. Sighing, Johnny guides her drowsy self back under the covers, certain that she would crash in the next minute or two. “I think you should take me on a date. We’d be a hell of a couple together.”

“I think you’re going to regret everything that’s happened just now when you wake up in the morning,” he returns, and there was a slight pang in his chest.

V only hums in response, and he doubts he had even heard what he last said. It doesn’t matter, however. Johnny was sure she wouldn’t want to bring this up again.

---

“Fuck…” V exhales groggily, her blinking eyes wincing at the bright sunlight flooding into the room. She feels pain all over, her head throbbing immensely as she tries to gather memories of the day prior. It comes back in bits and pieces until suddenly, she remembers everything.

Everything.

“Good morning, princess,” Johnny greets after materializing before her, a cocky smirk plastered on his face. “How ya feelin’? Still loopy or need a little more refreshing from ‘mister sex on legs?’”

V’s reflexes are quick; Johnny doesn’t even register the pillow being hurled at him at first. He only realizes it when the empty glass bottles on the center table falls to the floor, shattering and making a mess.

“You’re lucky you’re just a hologram, right now,” V muttered as she stands up unsteadily.

Johnny holds his hands up. “You were the one who said it.”

Rolling her eyes, V reaches for the painkillers Misty left on the side. “Don’t remind me.”

“Alright, but at least let me tell you that you’ve got a shitty voice.”

“That’s why I don’t do karaoke,” V snorts before swallowing the pills and heading to the couch. “So, what do you think?”

“What do you mean?” Johnny questions.

“You, me, dinner?”

V waits for his reaction, smiling coyly at his confusion. When Johnny finally understands what she was referring to, he almost couldn’t believe it.

“Wait, are you fucking serious?”

She lets out a chortle. “Yeah, I’m serious. Don’t get me wrong, I’m mortified about last night, and I’m never going to let Vik knock me out with that stuff again. But hey, the truth came out. Might not have remembered you, but even while high as fuck, I knew I liked you.”

Briefly, they traded a look of longing, acknowledging at last this deeper connection they’ve felt for a while. It was much more than sharing a body, a mind. Something more profound than what Johnny and V have experienced before in their lives.

And though it was all entirely new to them, they both wanted it. They both wanted each other.

“Better get to it then,” Johnny flashes a grin, mirroring V’s own. “Wanna start with breakfast? Bet you’re hungry after skipping what Misty brought you, samurai.”

“Never going to live that one down, are ya?”

Shooting her a cheeky wink, Johnny throws on his stylish pair of aviators with ease.

“You bet your ass I’m not.”

Permanent Tags: @penwieldingdreamer @keandrews @feminine-machinegun @fanficsrusz @thehumanistsdiary @flaminasteroid @rowserein @unaspiringwritings @planetkt @breakthenight @baphometwolf666 @rdjloverxxx

Johnny Silverhand Tags: @silverse​ @overheardatthecontinental @life-is-fuucked @ataraxydreams

[t0shii]

hi could i request kita, tendou, and mattsun and it’s your first time sleeping at their place and they find out you cant sleep in the dark and need to sleep with a night light?

% s/o who can't sleep in the dark

.! timeskip! kita, tendou, matsuwaka (sep) x gn!r

.! fluff/ mention of food in kita's, mention of rainstorm in tendou's, water drinking in mattsun's- not proofread.

.! hi! ty for the request <3 sorry u had to wait so long :(( (idk why these ended up to be so long)

kita

to say you were nervous to stay the night as your boyfriends place for the first time would be an understatement... your heart raced as kita placed your back on the ground to unlock the front door, "make yourself at home." he opens the door, "down there is the bathroom... and that's my room." he shows you around and you crack a joke about how clean his house is compared to your apartment. you both decide on a movie night with take out which he insisted you choose.

you yawn and rub your eyes as the third movie of the night ends. you'd been laying in between his legs, back pressed against his chest. you sit up and he follows, wrapping his arms around you and perching his chin on your shoulder, "sleepy? we can head to bed if you want." he mumbles into your neck before planting a kiss there, "mhm, let me change first though." you try standing up to reach your bag but his hold on you doesn't loosen, "i have clothes you can wear." he says bluntly, standing up and bringing you with him. he leads you to his room, rummages through his dresser and hands you a shirt and shorts, "these should fit, yeah? i'll leave so you can change."

you start to internally panic as you both settle into his bed, and he begins turning off every light in the room. suddenly theres only one bedside lamp illuminating the room, he reaches to turn it off and lays down, pulling your body against his which makes you giggle. "good night." he mumbles into your hair, "night." you sigh. 'maybe if you close your eyes you'll forget it's dark' you think to yourself, squeezing your eyes shut. thirty minutes pass you're still awake. you sigh, a little louder than intended, "y/n? are you still awake?" you mentally scold yourself, "yeah" he props himself up with his elbow; you angle your head back to look at him, "what's wrong?" the sleep in his voice evident. "well... uhm... i..." his eyes soften as he notices you becoming nervous and he cups your cheek with his free hand, "you can tell me angel."

you can help but lean into his touch "it's embarrassing" "not it's not" "okay well... i can't sleep in the dark. ever since i was a kid, i've never been able to." you can see eyebrows furrow from the small amount of moon light peeking through his curtains, "why didn't you tell me before i turned all the lights off?" he frowns, reaching over to turn the lamp on, relief filling your chest at the illuminated room. "because it's embarrassing." you mumble as he lays back down and pulls you against his chest again, "it's not embarrassing, baby, at least not to me. so no need to embarrassed, i won't judge you for i and besides, i don't mind sleeping with a light on." he places and kiss on your temple and you sleep well, secure and comfortable in his arms.

tendou

you'd been over to tendou's apartment plenty of times before and every time you made up some lame excuse for why you couldn't stay the night, "i need to feed my cat" "my clothes are still in the washer" literally anything to save you from the embarrassment of having to tell him you couldn't sleep in the dark. tonight was different though, with a storm passing over town and not looking like it's letting up any time soon, he wouldn't let you leave. "ten, i dont have any clothes here, my cat's by herself-" he cuts you off "babe, babe- you can wear something of mine if you want and i'm sure she'll be fine. she's a cat." he holds you firmly in your cuddling position on his couch. "fine." you grumble.

really, if he had to be honest, it hurt tendou's feelings a little bit that you were always against the idea of staying the night with him- but he had no choice but to celebrate this small victory and thank the rain storm, "it's for your safety, angel." he says proudly, placing a kiss on your cheek. you choose to ignore the nervous feeling creeping up your belly and rest your head back on his chest, "yeah yeah let's just continue with the show, i'm invested in the plot." "you mean the hot main characters?" "exactly... the plot." you giggle while he pretends to be offended. three hours later you find your eyelids getting heavier and heavier until you can barely keep them open and your boyfriend seems to take notice quickly.

"are you falling asleep on me? we haven't even finished season 3 yet." he mumbles and you let out a groan, "it's two in the morning, of course i'm getting sleepy." you rub your eyes, "i'm just giving you a hard time, babe. you're the one who wanted to stay up though but i guess we can go to bed now." you sit up and stands from his position on the couch and helps you up, "c'mon sleepy head, you can make it." he grins taking your hand and leading you to his room. he lets you sit on his bed while he looks through his dresser, "hmm is this shirt okay?" you nod as he hands you an old band shirt "i'll be right back." he leaves the room with his own change of clothes. once he's back you both lay down, "oh babe, i almost forgot, you wanna see something cool? he gets out of the bed and you respond with an "mhm" as he begins to turn all the lights off, a familiar nervousness creeping up your belly as the room gets darker and darker.

"okay okay, so i don't sleep well in pitch dark but the lamp is just too much light so i got this-" he plugs in a small object into the wall, stars illuminate his bedroom ceiling as well as your other surroundings and he smiles wide, "see it makes stars, theres a moving option too but i don't really like it that much. oh, and don't make fun of me." he says seriously, sliding back into bed with you, arms wrapping loosely around your waist, "well i can't make fun of you for that, satori." "i was just hoping you wouldn't, honestly." he chuckles. "babe, do you wanna know i always avoided staying the night here?" you ask, ready to confess your secret. "i didn't wanna force it out of you but now that you're ready, yes." you both turn your heads to look at each other. "the truth is, i was embarrassed because i also cant sleep in the dark, been that way for as long as i can remember. but i'm glad theres someone i can relate to." "how ironic" he mumbles, placing his face into the crook of your neck. you sleep like a baby in his arms that night.

matsuwaka

you were over at issei's place so he could help you study for an exam coming up, honestly you didn't want to stay as late as you did and when the both of you finally noticed the time he just wouldn't let you leave. "c'mon baby, it's too late. it would be irresponsible of me to let you go home now, i don't mind you staying the night." he hugs you tight like you'll disappear if he lets go, face buried in the crook of your neck. you sigh in defeat, "okay fine." his head perks up as you say it and he smiles at you, "i can get you something to sleep in if you want."

that's how you got in this situation, awake hours after your boyfriend had already fallen asleep. finally after two hours of laying in the dark listening to his snores, you sigh quietly, slipping out of his loose embrace and tip toeing your way to his kitchen to get a glass of water and sat at the dining table. you'd been sitting there for about thirty minutes before you heard the bedroom door creak open and heavy, rushed footsteps make their way towards you. "y/n?" you recognize a panic in your boyfriend's groggy voice, "i'm in here." you croak out hearing a sigh of relief escape his lips once he sees you. you look up at him, his hair was an absolute curly mess and his eye lids were droopier than they already were, he was obviously still half asleep. "y/n there you are. he sits in a chair next to you, "you scared me, i woke up and you were gone. i thought you left." he leans his head on your shoulder, "sorry." you mumble, bringing a hand up to run through his hair a few times resulting in a groan from the man.

"'s okay, how long have you been awake?" "hmm about two and a half hours now." you reply honestly, "what? baby, why didn't you wake me up?" he raises his head and you both turn to look at each other, "you were tired, issei-" he interrupts you, "so? you shouldn't have had to be awake by yourself." "it's fine, i knew it was gonna happen, i knew i wouldn't be able to sleep" "why's that?" you sigh, internally scolding yourself for the hole you've dug yourself into. "i... i cant sleep in the dark." he looks at you for a moment, "that's all? that's what kept you up this whole time?" he asks and you nod. mattsun can't help the grin that makes his way onto his lips, "baby, you should've just told me, i could've kept a light on for you." "no- look i shouldn't have told you now you'll think i'm immature." you mumble, looking away from him. "no no baby, it's totally normal, honestly and i don't think any less of you. i just wish you would've told me sooner because then we'd both be sleeping right now. he hugs you before standing the both of you up, "c'mon we're going to bed." he grabs your glass and leads you back to his bed. you sleep in his embrace, table lamp illuminating the room the rest of the night.