#I really like to play on words...
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WELCOME TO THE MIND FXXK
#welcome home#maretu#Sorry for anyone unseeing this#I really like to play on words...#welcome home au
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I want it back = I drag its dead weight forward
#artists on tumblr#animation#in stars and time#isat#illustration#in stars and time spoilers#isat spoilers#like for real#anyway I'm still thinking about Siffrin Instarsandtime#shoutout to tumblr user jb-blunk for the words from the caption which inspired this whole deal#literally finished the game and had those words looping (haHA) in my head like 'how do I use this what can I do to match this feeling' LMAO#if you haven't played ISAT well. first of all stop looking don't glean anything from this shhhh- but also GO PLAY IT IT'S EXCELLENT#heavily based off the astronomical clock in Prague! I love that thing so it was really fun to try and make it more ISAT-like#bc the themes are already there yanno!! Stars n' whatnot! And then of course the craft types instead of the astrological signs!#Loop and the King for the sun and the moon!!#can you tell I thought about and planned this one for like. A while. Longer than I usually spend LMAO#so yeah go play it immediately come be absolutely ILL and SICK and PLAGUED about the secret boss with me#fanart#pic
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Why do I keep seeing transmascs and trans men insisting or implying that all trans men are "female socialized," or "understand the female experience," or "navigated the world as a woman." Because yeah, sure, that can be true for some people. especially if you weren't gnc at all as a kid and didn't crack your egg until well into adulthood, it makes sense.
But they don't stop at saying they had that experience. It always comes with an addendum that trans men, as a group, all can relate to this experience. I don't know about the entirety of my demographic, but I never got even a little bit of what some of them talk about. I didn't even believe that women were scared of going out at night until I kept consistently seeing them say it, online or wherever, for years. I never realized catcalling was a thing until I saw some women complaining about it on reddit.
But they posit it as some sort of, you're safer than cis men, right? You know what it's like? Which, on top of being patently, demonstrably false in the case of myself and many other trans men, holds some unpleasant and often outright hostile implications about trans women. And they always deny it, but if you can't even conceptualize someone like me who grew up gnc, and never got the bulk (or any?) of whatever we consider to be 'female socialization,' what does that say about what you think trans girls went through, growing up? I don't want to speak for them, as I've never experienced that firsthand, but I can guarantee that (if you're even a little bit obviously trans) people don't treat you like a cis kid of the opposite gender. By and large, they don't get treated like cis boys.
It just makes me mad that we're taking this inaccurate framework that (ever so conveniently) puts trans people into the box of our assumed birth gender, and trying to fancy it up and use it with a faux-progressive veneer; never mind the way that transphobes use it to bar trans women from being athletes, or using the bathroom, or having access to any gendered resources they need. It would be bad enough to try and dust it off and use it even if it were largely accurate, due to the aforementioned connections to outright transphobia, but it literally is patently false. Not in all cases, obviously, but why are we trying to revamp this untrue, inaccurate generalization and pretend that we can make it 'trans-inclusive?'
#o.#trans#transphobia#transmisogyny#I may or may not be talking about a specific post I saw that made me irritated but I didnt wanna get in an argument with internet strangers#sorry guys I'm still heated over freaking collin allred capitulating to ted cruz and throwing trans girls under the bus bc he didnt have the#guts to stick to his morals#and called them ''this idiotic business with boys in girls sports'' or some crap#as if trans girls don't deserve to play the sports they love. like I imagine if they blocked trans men from being physicists or something#and I just wasn't able to pursue the career I want? that would destroy me#and I still had to vote for him because the other options were ted cruz and some freaking libertarian.#sorry thats all tangential but can we not use the same rhetoric that all these politicians do as an excuse to kick trans women out of public#life PLEASE 🙏#...also I really hate the Popular Transmasc Ideology that says that we all experience life as basically the same as a cis woman & never have#to navigate having male privilege & being an ally to women#and all have some sort of Innate Connection to femaleness or womanhood or whatever bc 'obviously' we all grew up just like girls do#ugh#this one's going out there sans editing so dont yell at me if I worded smth weird please 🙏
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tristamp post-S1 mashwood sillies and tri98(?) merylwood :]
#trigun#trigun stampede#tristamp#trigun 1998#trigun 98#vash the stampede#nicholas d. wolfwood#meryl stryfe#mashwood#merylwood#stryfewood#the comfort of mashwood spending days together without much happening. just eventless days together#also i know i know meryl and ww barely interact in '98 but#who cares when i can just put two of my fav characters together like playing with dolls#after the fifth moon incident ww trying to leave w/o a word to go look for vash#and meryl having none of his shit bc she already lost sight of one of them so shes not about to lose the other one#*SLAPS VW AND MW* THESE BITCHES CAN STORE SO MUCH UNSPOKEN THINGS#i also just really like ww getting flustered and manhandled by a three-apples-tall woman#merylwood is yuri to me. im not explaining#my art#raepliica_art
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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#the fact that people think scum villain#-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me#especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater#heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series#he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters#(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters#like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx#I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes#side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me#i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation#but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years#like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain#the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too#+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu#as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people#another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does#also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be#he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students#and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing#+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this#but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy
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It's always, like, mildly annoying when people see a het trans couple and go "all that work just to be straight?" like... one, you don't know if they're straight and two, trans people don't owe you a queer sexuality to "make up" for the fact we're trans. Transhet people aren't a subtype of trans people, they're members of the trans community, and the queer one if they so desire!
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#and i don't really vibe with the word microaggression but it's very that#like it just comes across like people think trans folks owe them queerness and cabaret preformances y'know?#and we cannot *be* if it means the way we are being isn't this carefully curated version people have of transness + queerness#and it can kind of warp your desires and understanding of yourself because you *want* community and to be seen and to be allowed to just be#this isn't universal and the 'you' is impersonal. i am aware this is a broad range of experiences and not everybody can/does relate#my overall point is that it's probably not the best move to act like this toward trans people#maybe i read too much into this but it's just something i have seen over and over and over and over . . . again#shoutout to the real ones (heterosexual and/or straight trans people or people in straight-presenting relationships 👍)#back to playing the lelda of zelda (is it bad that i don't even call her zelda anymore i just go 'THERES LELDA!!!')#it sounds wrong to call her zelda now 😭#the LEG OF ZEG. SWORD SKORD???? BREATH OF THE WEATH!! -my brain 24/7/365
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#criminal minds#criminalmindsedit#criminalmindsverse#proceduraledit#emily prentiss#emilyprentissedit#cmverse#cmverseedit#criminal minds evolution#cmevolutionedit#tvedit#filmtvcentral#dailyflicks#ladiesblr#femalecharacters#bitchys#mine#edit#*#internal*#evidence*#p r o o f#i have been struggling for AGES with how i wanted to do a set pairing the lauren arc and the 'play along' scene#and then cme just gifted me this perfect container scene *chef's kiss* i know there's hella nuance that needs to be read into this set#(like the warehouse scene is really just representative of her mindset undercover) but i think you guys Get It#otp: you are who you pretend to be#(feels so ... to use that tag on this set specifically but it's also exactly how i ship them - as emily's coping mechanism - so!!!)#someday i will let go of the lauren arc. someday. (no i won't.)#criminal minds evolution spoilers#(tag issue resolved!! sorry for the duplicate set guys you'll never guess what the issue word was)
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i think L should've tried harder to piss light off. provoking light into slipping up would not only be hilarious i also think it would be extremely easy and effective. not saying you could get light to actually confess this way, but he would definitely make more dumb mistakes if, for example, L kept interrupting their homoerotic brain chess matches to insist that kira is actually matsuda because the butts match
#death note#rookposting#more ideas:#light tweets his detailed and reasoned thoughts on politics and law on his 122 follower twitter account#L uses his 1.4M follower acc to quote tweet him constantly with the word 'wrong' in all lowercase#L makes light watch detective pikachu and keeps going 'you should take notes light-kun i think you could learn a lot from that hamster'#(this one's anachronistic but it works on two levels because light is also irate that L is calling pikachu a hamster)#L keeps 'forgetting' light's name#L listens to light making an argument and stares at him for 0.4 seconds and then turns around like he never spoke#the taskforce gets a dog and L names the dog light. light (person) is now light 2#L keeps countering light's arguments with blatantly nonsensical rebuttals but interrupts him every time light tries to argue back#see L wouldn't do any of this because L is more concerned with playing their gayass game than he is with winning#but if for example L wanted to win instead of lose he should listen to my ideas about offering everyone a cup of coffee except light#because light should really take it easy on the caffeine it's starting to affect his complexion
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yeah maybe danbert isn't canon but when one of them is trying to distract themselves listening to the other have sex, goes upstairs and there's a shot of him looking on longingly at what he can't have before going downstairs looking at the ground and sadly running his hand along his shirt and tie what else can it be?
#seriously what else do you call that shot of herbert in the dark watching dan be with someone else? that's pure sadness in his face#then he's just slowly walking around the house with his head down and he doesn't even notice the cop until he's practically in front of him#then the way he later repeats dan's words when he's trying to endear the bride to him#like i know jeffrey combs said he never really played herbert as being in love with dan#(not that he's ever denied the reading which is why he's amazing)#you don't really need to do anything else when it's already in the script you know?#anyway. danbert for clear skin#reanimator#herbert west#dan cain#jeffrey combs#bruce abbott#re animator#bride of reanimator
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okay so steph is definitely a music purist?
we can all agree on that right? like she's a 'said she was born in the wrong generation in middle school' fleetwood mac, david bowie, the mamas & the papas, niche modern indie artists and also chappell roan kind of music listener. obviously. but.... i dont think we've really considered pete's music taste?
pete, who is a science, left-brained kind of kid, so he probably does not actively go out to look for music and is instead just provided music by the people around him?
pete whose older brother is theodore spankoffski and so his earliest and most fond and nostalgic music influences from his childhood would have come directly from ted's cd collection???
basically what im saying is peter spankoffski has the most trashy, early 00's ke$ha, black eyed peas my humps era, all american rejects ass music taste in the world
that boy had bowling for soup's 1985 memorized at age four, his guilty pleasure music is hollywood undead's everywhere i go, ted did his first decent person move in years when pete came out as trans as a kid and stopped listening to grow a pear by ke$ha and pete forcibly made him play it because it's a bop
and then his only friends are a weeb and a theatre kid.
steph gives him the aux cord on a date to be nice, as a sign of trust, and is blasted in the face with the most uncurated mess of j-pop, sondheim, weezer, and like... owl city's fireflies and that's just a fact
#I must clarify this isn’t a dig at any of these songs they all fuck#my source is im a youngest child with a decently older brother and all of my nostalgic music is literally this#my mom had to force my brother to limit what songs he played around me because I was six years old and started saying the word hoe a lot#peter spankoffski#also my hc is Pete is teds full brother so their parents are just Old and Pete stood NO chance#he grew up around Dickhead Era Ted and a dad who forced him to name classic rock bands when they came on the radio#and also my source is my music taste is also the peoples around me because im bad at finding music#nerdy prudes must die#stephanie lauter#starkid#lautski#he also probably really likes train
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Curly not immediately punishing Jimmy for assaulting Anya is something I don’t think a lot of people are viewing in the complex context for Curly as the superior to both of them and closest confidante they had.
Like I am in no way saying he didn’t under react or fail Anya by not being harsh or direct with Jimmy but it really is the case that he really couldn’t. Imagine being stuck in such a confined space with very little areas to genuinely hold someone if they commit a crime. It’s not like this was an event that occurred before they departed or that they have easy communication with The Pony Express to ask for how to proceed when something like this arises. Not to mention, Jimmy’s relative power in relation to Anya as the co-pilot and second in command, he has the knowledge and access to do something to her had Curly directly punished him in this setting.
They were also Curly’s friends. It’s not just the case of him mediating something between his subordinates but people he is personally invested in don’t want to see spiral further in Anya’s case while also not wanting believe his friend go that bad in Jimmy’s actions. They were both suicidal and Curly putting Jimmy’s stability first is both out of bias but also the fact he’s aware at some level Jimmy is a danger to himself and others if not constantly placated. Combined with the fact he was in denial or just not piecing together what Anya said it’s hard to say what he buying time for and what he had treat as urgent. This isn’t even saying he doesn’t care about Anya but he’s not going jump to the worst conclusions about his friends even if part of him acknowledges the evidence saying so. It’s a complicated thing but he’s still human and needed to process it on top of trying to keep a ship that already took on a lot of water from further sinking, metaphorically.
I just personally think that while Curly failed Anya, it was a scenario where there wasn’t much he could do to the best thing by her safely and like Jimmy, we are underestimating what a good leader would do in a very fragile and tense situation like he was in. By the time he may have been ready and had a plan, things were much too late.
#like in my one Anya still respected Curly after he didn’t punish Jimmy so I assume he still respected her or reassured her he’d do something#it just was never enough because sadly Jimmy just needed to be removed from the ship and that’s not possible#cause no matter what Jimmy was going to do something stupid to fix it and Curly had to be thinking of a way to avoid that but also trying to#play the subjective role of friend and objective role of captain with two of the people he is currently closest with#not to mention how he’s a big picture guy and it’s not an excuse but those little detail and subtle behaviors are probably lost if the big#picture looks fine still and he admits he’d drive himself crazy trying to look for it#like weirdly Curlys character is only seen through the people he tried to protect and we judge him on his failures but we don’t get too much#on his insights directly as Jimmy is unreliable and he tries hard to be gentle with Anya#personal note is I don’t think Curly underplaying Anya’s trauma is a guy code protecting my bud thing but more a flaw in his personal#character in where he just wants everything and everyone to be ok in the end and taking responsibility that isn’t his to bare like he can’t#make up for what Jimmy did but he tried and that’s the problem really cause he’s just used to actually fixing it for him and it’s the case#this is the one thing he really couldn’t like I think he’s a good guy but he’s trapped in his and a bunch of other peoples worse moments#anya mouthwashing#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing curly#curly mouthwashing#mouthwashing anya#jimmy mouthwashing#captain curly#nurse Anya#mouthwashing spoilers#rape tw#suicide tw#also last thought is how he like also was being emotionally drained by Jimmy constantly like Anya and his relationship with Jimmy parallel#each other in such a way that both him and Anya warily follow the words of the others abuser because they fear the physical or emotional#repercussions if they don’t like her not being able to really tell curly what happened and then curly not being able to do the same and how#jimmy assaults and dehumanizes both when they are no longer a service to him like god they are more adjacent than Jimmy and Curly like Curly#messed up in a already messy pile Jimmy mad it into a dumpster fire in a landfill they are not the same
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something about the main menu for life is strange genuinely makes me wanna collapse and sob
#like not just the music but the overall visuals yknow#it's like this gut wrenching#almost nostalgic ????#feeling that hits like a truck#especially after playing the full game#seeing how peaceful things could be is almost like#i dunno gives me that feeling of dread when you've done something you can't undo#seeing how good things could be but knowing you don't get to go back#sorta thing#it's just#something about beautiful pictures having gut wrenching back stories#does something bad to my brain#naturally#i dunno i'm half asleep and rambling#but yknow what i mean#i'm trying to put it into words as best i can#it's like#it really is just like what growing up feels like ig#especially when it doesn't turn out how you want#wanting to go back and warn yourself so you can hopefully make things easier and more ideal but obviously you can't#that's kinda what the menu feels like#music and all#especially those goddamn birds chirping#ok goodnight#life is strange#chloe price#max caulfield#lis chloe#lis max#pricefield
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I met the me who made different choices
#idk what this means so dont ask#got the words stuck in my head and this is what I wanted to draw for it immediately#me at my desk. so.#I dont look exactly like this obviously. doesnt matter. anyways#hard time recently in a lot of different ways#lots of work to do!#given up on getting everything done I kind of failed at that. it was too much#so now I'm just trying to get anything done that will make the next 6 months not kill me again#ideally. 3 episodes. or the book#or like at least close enough to that that its basically that#I'm feeling really screwed LOL#I dont know how I've been working every day for so long and still havent done enough...#(its because the work load is way too much)#every time I take 1 hour for myself. to cook. or clean. or draw something else. or play a game. I feel so guilty auauau#I hate webtoon I hate this damn green app...#DOESNT MATTER!!!#what DOES matter is my art is good as hell... look at this shit...#the light. the colors. I love you red I love you green#I need to get more red pants I only have the one pair.#I saw this guy with red pants that had skeleton legs on them and I was like FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!! I need them!!!!#I need to start sewing again. I dont have a sewing machine cause my apartment is too small so I havent sewn in years but I really want to..#I want to make clothes again... I need some vests I need some dresses..#I will not make pants or sleeved shirts because I dont hate myself#sketch#art#vent art I guess LMFAO its not#its just this fun little thing we like to call self expression#also this isnt how my desk setup actually is I scooted things around cause I didnt wanna draw anything twice. fuck it we ball#ok back to work
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it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.
yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.
it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.
how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.
chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?
how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.
"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.
i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.
#writeblr#warm up#i can't write rn but i have SO much words in here bc im reading the chorus of dragons books#(just started book 4)#and this woman's writing is just LIVING in my brain. let me out!!!#(i read roughly like 2-4 books a week usually bc i go on long walks with my dog but when a book is REALLY good like. it eats my life. )#anyway ...... so like here's a story that idk i've tried to explain to other people as being wild#but maybe im the only one who thinks it is wild???#so i play pokemon go (i just started in jan) bc i love pokemon and as i have mentioned i walk goblin for like an hour in the morning#and i don't like a lot of fitness trackers due to the fact it makes me .sad. but i also wanted the little digital rewards. enter pokemon go#anyway so they make you make friends to complete quests. so i used a reddit thread. i do not usually use reddit. i don't have an acct#i lurked. i just googled like ''pokemon go reddit '' and randomly added a bunch of numbers#i was on that page for all of 15 minutes. there are THOUSANDS of responses on that page.#here's what's wild: in that group of people. even though i am not on reddit and it was one random event once#it turns out one of those people lives in the town i live in. or at least very close. i only know this because#when we send each other gifts. it's from the same freaking area.#i can't ask them to meet up bc pokemon go doesn't have a messaging app lol but like . what are the fucking chances that#a random person posts in a random reddit thread and HAPPENS to get added by someone ELSE from their SAME TOWN#who by pure fucking CHANCE is ALSO playing pokemon go and looking for friends#i googled it there's only 42000 people in my broad region. the .......... smallness ! of the world!!!
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#HEHEHE THEY'RE SO CUTE I LOVE THEMMM#such a shame these scenes are so brief 😭#avatar#avatar 2#the way of water#sully family#jake sully#neytiri#neteyam#kiri#lo'ak#jeytiri#lì'fya leNa'vi#gif#i'm actually not sure whether Jake is meant to be saying “sloa tsyal” (wide wing) or “slotsyal” (stormglider) here#but i thiiiiiink i hear the -a sound in there#i mean i suppose it doesn't REALLY matter; either one would make sense in this context#and the species name “slotsyal” derives from “sloa tsyal” anyways (as I'm sure you could've guessed hrh)#(btw “syu” is not a real word; just the closest I could come to the “whoosh” sound effect he's making with Forest dialect phonetics hrh)#it sounds like he also says something else before Neytiri says “hufwe” but I can't make out what it's supposed to be#cuz the voiceover narration is talking over it -_-;#in the next shot when Neytiri is running around she also says something#sounds like it might be “tysal latsu” meaning roughly “must be a wing”#or perhaps “tsyal atun” meaning “red/orange wing” which would make sense with Kiri's little Toruk toy#but I think there's an S sound in there so idk#again it's hard to tell because the narration is playing over it#SHUT UP NARRATION JAKE I'M TRYING TO HEAR WHAT'S HAPPENING IN THE SCENE 😭#oh well
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Link would be the type of chess player that has a hard time concentrating on the strategy of the whole board and can only concentrate on a piece at a time. He loses most games, but his strategy is nonexistent, making him extremely unpredictable. Revali is a master strategist, (which we can see in his dialogue in Age of Calamity), so Link's blockheaded, rock-eating playing style is infuriating.
#everybody's favorite rock-eater playing “chest” as he called it#link#revali#revalink#if only because they will be boyfriends#botw#loz#breath of the wild#i like writing Link as kind of this dumbass that is actually kind of smart about certain things#like he seems really dumb but really he's just too autistic to communicate properly and will sometimes point at a horse and go “horse”#in other words he is me#i am he#art#thefaeriecreekart
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