#I really don't think he got everything he deserved back in 2016

[luvisia]

can we be crazy about simon peacock again (?)

[lululawrence]

Annual Writing Self-Evaluation 2023

Thank you for tagging me @allwaswell16! I am so happy every year that this (I believe) brainchild of @juliusschmidt's from 2016 still exists in various forms! hehe I apparently missed doing this in 2021 and 2022, and I was determined not to miss it again so here we go!

List of works published this year: My Other Half Was You Gemma's Dad (Could Use A Guy Like Me) Quite the Pickle Livin' In A Daydream (Gimme a Solution and) Watch Me Run With It You Are A Song Did You Know I Fit In A Dryer? Were You There On That Christmas Night? Team Gaelic FTW No Constraints Odds Are That We Will Probably Be... Damsel in Christmas Distress Snow In Love

Work you are most proud of (and why): Oof. This is always such a hard question to answer. Almost as hard as the next one, and the next one and the next one....... hah honestly though, I think... I'm honestly sincerely proud of most of my fics from this year simply because I got them written. I'll go more into that later, I'm sure, but maybe... I think maybe My Other Half Was You or Odds Are That We Will Probably Be... and for very different reasons. My Other Half Was You was written based on artwork by @moon-sun-thyme for @1dreversebang and the moment I saw her artwork I had these vague ideas coming to mind and I am quite proud with how I was able to bring them to life so closely resembling what I originally thought of when I saw the art. And for Odds Are, I wrote that for @1dtrickortreatfest so it had to be exactly 666 words and that's always a trick (heh), but in this case I had to completely world build and set up the situation and lead everyone to the conclusion within that word count while making it somewhat compelling... and I think I was able to manage it. I hope I was, anyway haha

Work you are least proud of (and why): lmaooooo usually this answer is really hard for me to answer, but this year it's not haha i have a few fics that I literally wrote to just remind myself that I could. That not everything has to be thought out and polished and pretty, sometimes it's just a matter of getting words on paper and putting them out into the world immediately, hoping for the best, and they absolutely served their purpose! I'm fond of them still, but that doesn't mean I'm proud of them necessarily haha So I would have to say Damsel in Christmas Distress (which I still love dearly, simply for how self indulgent that silly thing is for me haha) and Quite the Pickle. Again, my darling Stylinshaw fics getting the brunt of it here, but they did as they needed to for me. I'll maybe try to write them a longer, more polished fic with some thought behind it this year, as they clearly deserve.

A favorite excerpt of your writing: GAHHHH I hate this question every damn time! Okay, I don't know if this is my absolute favorite thing I wrote this year, BUT it immediately came to mind, and I do very much like it so, here's an excerpt from Gemma's Dad (Could Use A Guy Like Me). I just adore Harry being a fumbling idiot around a pretty boy hahaha Ever since he had dug up his garden, he preferred to start in the back where the job was a lot more complicated to work around and then move to the front, which was far easier.  Now, though, Harry was wondering if this was the right decision because Louis was also mowing his lawn. That wasn’t a problem, of course, except he was shirtless and that only defined for Harry the fact he really had grown up. Louis used to try to show off for the neighborhood by mowing any number of lawns shirtless in middle school and high school, but he had been a scrawny kid with little to no meat on his bones and Harry had thought it adorable back then. Now, on a sweltering day like it was, he was probably shirtless just to be as cool as possible as the sun beat down on him, and Harry’s vision wasn’t as good as it used to be, but he could still tell that Louis had filled out since going to college. He was still a thin man, but as he pushed the mower through the tall grass, Harry could see the muscles he clearly put effort into. Add to it the chest hair that was only growing darker as he continued to sweat and the smattering of tattoos he’d gotten since he turned eighteen and it was clear he had grown up. Harry couldn’t help it when the glint of the sun off Louis’ sweaty skin made him lick his lips without even thinking. Clearing his throat and thankful it was obvious Louis was too focused to notice Harry ogling him from his own yard, Harry pulled the starter and began to work on his own yard.

Share or describe a favorite review you received: I've got three that immediately came to mind, so excuse me while I mention all three as quickly as I can manage lol First was from @allwaswell16 for Gemma's Dad. I'd had a lot of difficulty with a someone reading motivations and meaning in the characters and story that I took a lot of care in ensuring were actually avoided as I wrote it. There were a lot of pitfalls I could have fallen into when writing the fic, but one person just kept asking over and over again for things I thought I had already done and my beta assured me I had sufficiently covered etc, but I still worried so when Anitra gave the review she did of it on her podcast, it literally made me cry a little bit lol Second was @londonfoginacup in response to (Gimme a Solution and) Watch Me Run With It when she commented "Ah so you really just tore your chest open and picked out your beating heart and handed it to me here, didn’t you" because... well I hadn't really considered it when I'd been writing the fic, but I guess I kind of did exactly that, yeah. haha And then lastly I want to thank @tommokat for their lovely comments on Snow In Love regarding the Michigan geography and freak lake effect snow that can be experienced there because I tried my very best to describe the absolute chaos that is that region in the wintertime and they basically affirmed that I had accurately captured it. Genuinely, the best gift I could have gotten haha

A time when writing was really, really hard: Excuse me while I laugh a bit hysterically until I cry alksdhglskfja The last year or two have been incredibly difficult for a whole host of reasons, but the ones that most affected my writing were my lingering (and seemingly unending) burnout combined with an absolute lack of time/energy available to write. There were so many times this year that I thought I wouldn't be able to do it or thought I'd have to pull out of various fests and just... cut down on things, but I kept pushing and kept trying and I did it. I'm so fucking proud of myself, honestly.

A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: Jordan North in Did You Know I Fit In A Dryer? Well, honestly, Louis in that fic too. And the entire premise of the fic. Really all of it surprised me lololol I never expected to write Jordan in a fic. Ever. hahahaa And as I've barely dabbled in a couple of weed candies is all, I certainly did not anticipate ever writing someone as THAT HIGH. sooooo...yeah just all of it hahaha

How did you grow as a writer this year: Psh. Bold of you to assume I've grown as a writer this year when I was merely doing what I could to survive haha if anything I kind of wonder if I went backwards in my writing abilities but who the fuck knows, really haha

How do you hope to grow next year: I just... I dunno man. I just kinda hope I'm in a better place this time next year so I'm just not so fucking tired all the time and so I have actual time to write, you know? lol continued good vibes are always welcome here, folks haha

Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): Like... everyone. hah I'm getting a little emotional thinking of everyone who helped me keep going this year. but the greatest? probably @londonfoginacup again. She was the biggest influence in actually getting my Big Bang finished because I didn't want to disappoint her (even though?? I know I won't??? like.. anyway) haha and then I wrote like three fics for her/dedicated them to her just because... like. she keeps me going some days honestly so yeah. Emmu. You're the bestest always babes. Love you.

Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: Listen, all I'm saying is in one of my fics it hits a little too close to home. Like I kind of wrote Harry's starting place... and kinda where he is for a lot of the fic... pretty much exactly how I was feeling, and still pretty much am, though for very different reasons. So it's maybe a little too much of my real life emotionally speaking in there yeah

Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: New? Not so much hahaha just don't give up!

Any new projects you're looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: YES. I was just talking with @moon-sun-thyme this morning that I started the year by posting a fic based on her art, and I'm going out of this year focusing on the fic we will be collaborating on together for the @onedirectionbigbang hehe so I'm very very excited to get started on that one. It's a fic I've been wanting to write almost ever since I first heard the song Satellite, so I am READY to delve in and lose myself to it, honestly. In the whole... one night every week or two I have to write. hahaha Here's hoping I make the deadline haaaaa

Tag three writers whose answers you'd like to read: MAN I have no idea who has and hasn't done this yet! So maybeeeee @justanothershadeofblue, @hellolovers13, anddddd @quotefromthatshow and @louandhazaf if you haven't done it already and want to! And shh I know it’s four but who cares lolol

*All answers should be about fics posted in 2023

Past Years: 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 and 2020 | 2022(ish)

[alliumbunny]

Headcanon time I guess(TMNT 2012)

BECAUSE I'M TERRIBLY MISSING TMNT BUT I'M BURNT OUT OF WATCHING NETFLIX HEADCANONS FOR TMNT 2012

If any of these end of very very very canon you can blame netflix for not having 4/5 seasons so I don't know everything oopsie :3

I'll start with my favorite character since obviously I'm gonna have alot to say about him :)

Oh girlie this is gonna be long(I TYPE ALOT LOL)

Michelangelo, Mikey, The best boy!! :3 sunshine boy idk

He's very very VERY fond of bugs, He picks them up and smiles at them :) and sometimes eats but only when his brothers aren't around because they 100% yell at him everytime they see him eat the bugs because B U G S!! Listen what else are they gonna eat that technically has meat? There's not gonna be any chicken in the sewers... maybe... who knows... chickens are weird like that <3

AS SOON!!! As they got internet and stuff in the lair he learned EVERY SINGLE CUSS WORD ✨✨✨ He also learns very quickly how and when to use them etc etc because he finds them so funny, Also He ONLY uses them with villains and only when his brothers/family/friends aren't around!! He comes up with the weirdest crazy fuckin Insults and thinks they are SO funny <3 lol (... Projection maybe :3 )

He's PanRomanic Asexual, because He deserves to be alittle(ALOT) Fruity 💖 (Kinda projection but not really, I'm Pansexual so sorta close LOL)

Tends to learn how to use weapons REALLY fast, He finds it really fun and interesting to learn how to use his brothers weapons!!! :D

Reads ao3 fanfics, Doesn't write any but found out Leo writes them and loves reading his, Mikey's just so glad his Oldest Brother has something fun he likes to do that isn't really serious!!! :D

Doesn't like Horror Movies(To much gore for him normally) but fucking loves Psychological Horror. I was about the say he liked The Magnus archives, but it didn't start until 2016 lol. So Umm :3 He likes reading horror stories alot. (This is projection probably but hey, I think he would hehehe)

Forgets his own birthday almost every single year(Oops going angsty now beware >:3 ) He doesn't see his birthday as important as his brothers or even his fathers so his brain just forgets about it, He always remembers his brothers tho(this is paired with the headcanon that they choose different days in the same month so that they didn't have to have 4 different birthdays on the same day lol)

April gave them a notebook and Mikey sketches in it, he runs out of space and starts to draw in between every other drawing because he doesn't want to ask for another one... :')

HE PUTS STICKERS ON THAT NOTEBOOK!!!! they're not very good stickers but like, He's collected them for years, every time he found one that wasn't destroyed then he takes it >:3 His brothers know about his little stickers and leave any stickers they find in his room <3 :'D

believes in luckiness/unluckiness and that sorta, luck theory(I might be the only person who's thought of this So I'll explain it oops) Basically Mikey believes that if Something good happens to him the same amount of bad will also happen later on, and vise versa :3 He doesn't let it bother him but it's always in the back of his mind.

The last thing also plays a part in this one. Mikey doesn't like when something REALLY good happens to him. He 100% believes that something REALLY bad will happen to him sometime after, Normally it does tho so he's kinda valid for it :')

Loves Animals, All kinds, He doesn't technically have a favorite(Until ICK comes into his life and it becomes cats) He loves cows and dogs and bunnies(PROJECTION LOL) and fish and Frogs and birds and dinosaurs and erhjdkjgbhdfkjbndfkjnjdfns ALL OF THEM, He doesn't really have a least favorite tho :)

He finds soda really weird, He likes diet soda tho, for some Weird reason, If he were to ever go to a fast food place he'd do that thing where to put some of every drink choice in one cup >:) (That's projection kinda, I used to do that so much omg, not anymore tho sadge)

Likes legos and stuff like it :D he likes building things that have instructions, He likes looking at the finished product and smiling and holding it and just OvO

LOVES COLORS!!! His favorite color isn't orange surprisingly tho, Instead it's the colors of the sky(in the day and night!!)

Likes sunsets/sunrises alot

He likes sitting on building roofs and just looks at the sky... It's when he cries the most LOL

DEPRESSION ROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (PROJECTION TO THE MAX) His room is messy and he can never get to cleaning it and it makes him sad and like, numb sorta lol

Has sleep issues lol <3 Insomnia but nobody knows <3 I'm lovin it but Mikey ain't ✨

Gets Auditory hallucinations every now and again. They spook him alot since they're normally of stuff breaking loudly

Can't stop moving ever and it's very endearing to me!!! Stims constantly when happy and it's really endearing to his brothers because that's how they now he's actually really happy to be there and hang out with them, He just loves them so much(in a sibling way of course, I swear it anyone thinks differently I will hit them with a chainsaw and eat their flesh!!!!) aka they also know when he's not happy because of it aswell tho.

He bites people when he wants to >:)

. . . Raph and Leo are tied for favorite brother...

Okay I should probably stop with the Mikey ones oopsie daisy :3

So Um!! Next lol!!

Leo... Leonardo <3 <3 LEO!!! :D

He is such a mother hen(Honestly that's canon oops) He has the second most Medical knowledge and uses it all the time (The first is Donnie)

He squints his eyes when he's confused or upset lol

He doesn't like crime but keeps accidentally doing it without thinking

Quotes space hero's and Raph and Donnie are sick of it, Mikey quotes it with him but isn't as good at remembering the quotes lol

Likes the stars and star gazes whenever he can :D

watches videos about space!!!!!! He rambles to His brothers(Mostly mikey) about space facts til he runs out and gets new ones and goes through the same thing!!! It makes him so happy!!!!!!!!!

Likes gum, like minty gum!!!! He finds it fun to chew lol

cries in his room alone, silently at night....

Okie doki Leo is hard to think of :( Umm so NEXT :D Raph!! Raphael!! Yippeeee

When He's confused his eyes go all wide and shit >:3

Surprisingly likes calmer music that's softer and shit y'know? :)

Hates the velvet texture...

Has a calendar in his room that's been on February(20XX idk) for years probably

God raph is also hard to do...

Okay okay next!!

Donnie, donatello....

I wish I could headcanon him out of liking april. /hj

STARES AT PEOPLE for ALONG time, without realizing

Collects blankets that are textures that he likes. He just... has a pile of blankets :)

Donatello isn't my favorite if you can't tell ._.'

OKAY I KNOW IT WAS MOSTLY MIKEY!! BUT HE'S MY FAVORITE OKAY JFBKJDSBKJSDGNJKDFNGJLNDFJL

I tried my best with the others :3

I only did the brothers cause... Idk I didn't wanna do the others, k :3

I hope there's no spelling mistakes but know me there is oopsie ;3 lol

I guess... bye then? Idk

[strawberry-cowmilk]

K here is a scary one. Unfortinately Halloween is over. Whatever. MC and and her brother pull a prank on the datables and brothers. MC suggest they should watch a supposedly haunted copy of Terrifier (2016). While the end credits start to roll after the ending the brother comes into the room dressed as Art the klown. Let's say that the brother looks exactly like him in costume. Boys reactions to the movie and to the prank.

Hi! Halloween is not over unless you want it to be ♡ I tried going to the family dinner in a halloween-inspired outfit last week. Anyways, on with the request, I hope you like it

mc and their brother prank the obey me cast

mc's gender is not mentioned, not proof read

a/n: I didn't watch the movie but according to the summary on wikipedia, it has a lot of gore scenes (it's really bad according to me). Maybe don't watch this if you're like me and cry at the sight of blood. Also, no Luke in this because this movie isn't child-friendly.

content warnings: pranking, mentions of gore, mentions/implication of vomiting

-----

Lucifer

horror movies don't affect him too much, he knows it's fake and is the type of dude who could fall asleep while the characters on the screen are screaming

so, when he saw your brother in the clown costume, lucifer didn't really bat an eye

'very funny, now take the costume off, Diavolo is here'

Mammon

mammon can't handle horror very well, but he acts like he does to look cool (nobody buys it)

after the movie was over, he declared that it wasn't scary at all, and nobody would ever be spooked by it

however when your brother showed up, mammon screeched and ran out of the room, climbing over levi and belphie on the couch and knocking over two vases in the process

Leviathan

levi enjoys horror, and it does scare him but it's the kind of fear you'd feel after the bread comes out of the toaster with jumpscares (you're scared for 2 seconds only before realising it's just bread)

still, he'd like it more if the movie was animated, partly because the gore will not be realistic anymore

levi felt the same toaster-fear after seeing your brother in the clown costume

Satan

he honestly wanted to see more plot in the movie, but neither horror or gore disturb him too much

satan didn't even notice your brother walked in dressed as the clown until he heard mammon scream and a vase breaking

it didn't scare him, and honestly, his experience pranking lucifer made him think the prank was predictable

Asmodeus

asmo can enjoy some good horror movies, but this doesn't count for straight up slasher films, he feels like he has to sit in a bath for hours afterwards despite being a demon

when he sees your brother, he screams a little before getting mad at him for the petty joke

he's going to do some research on future movie night films

Beelzebub

beel loves watching movies because of the food that will be present, but he felt a little bit uneasy eating while something like this was playing on the screen

the prank didn't scare him, he was enjoying some candy bar and that deserved more of his attention than a dude in a clown costume

beel asks you if you're okay after everything, what if the movie was too much for a human to handle?

Belphegor

he fell asleep right at the start of the movie, abd woke up during some violent scene in the middle

so it's this kind of movie? well, belphie's going straight back to sleep

also he would have slept through the prank if only it didn't cause a chaos, he just woke up and squinted his eyes to see what's happening

Diavolo

this man is always so happy to watch movies with everyone, but this is one of the cases where he goes in smiling and cones out questioning why he came

so these are human world movies? interesting to know

the prank didn't really scare him, if it did, it would have been like levi's toaster-fear, diavolo appreciates the effort but thinks it's not funny

Barbatos

to be honest, he's pretty disappointed

you got the whole devildom prince sitting here and this is the kind of quality of movie you decide to show him? and personally barbatos prefers films with more plot

the prank was the final blow he needed to leave, he made up some work related excuse and left

Simeon

he's never been happier with his choice to not bring luke to this movie night

simeon can handle horror and gore normally, but he had to look away from some scenes in this film for the sake of the food he just ate

and honestly, he too could see the prank coming

Solomon

solomon is kind of the same as simeon, though his tolerance for highly violent scenes is higher than the angel's

and the prank itself wasn't all too funny to him

the funniest parts to solomon were mammon's escape act, barbatos awkwardly leaving and asmo's yelling at your brother

[ojirocardigansniper]

30, 34, 38, and B for blink !

Tahnks for blowing up my whole shit ian i love you.

30. Who do they most regret meeting? 

the second i saw 30 was this i said outloud OH FUCK. onehit kill. can't be any answer other than her best friend. they are pair bonded like parrots (Tragic). girl meets boy because her job is going to be listening for response from the gods he's killing himself to communicate with, and her job is going to be watching him die, teaching the next one to die, and the next, until her drowning day finally comes. she met his predecessor in uer end stages of sickness, so she knows how it will look for him. No matter how much she loves him or how many times she can get away with dumping out his ritual cup, he's committed to what he's doing, what he's been raised to do... so yeah, she regrets meeting him. not that she thinks of it as something she chose to do, seeing as it's all divine-vision-scraps that brought her there. but when she still sometimes wishes for another life for them, often she thinks separate lives would have the best chance of peace.

34. How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt?

mm. impossible really. survivor's guilt alchemized into rage at who seemed responsible, but it's still there. she feels simultaneously that she doesn't deserve the losses she's suffered, and that she's still here and alive. there's also insanely complex guilt around everything with her partner's slow ritual death and the death of their mentor the same way. the struggle between prolonging the suffering overall versus staving the worst of it off now. (under my breath) the phrase Quality of Life is not part of their lexicon and it shows . whats that hospice by the antlers you say ? something something shiva4shiva? noooo haha whattt

38. What memory do they revisit the most often?

ah jeez. ah fuck. hard to say. technically i suppose memories of her death (past visions of it) but that's not voluntary. unconsciously i think she very often revisits childhood memories of her brother- always has fragments of them floating about without realizing. one of her core unfulfilled needs is that close companionship she lost back then- she's been trying to fill that hole ever since, no matter if she does so on purpose. i'm really trying to think of things she would consciously try to remember and. mostly coming up with 'tonguing the hole in the gum' type things. don't forget the pain of this or you'll stop letting it drive you. (kicks a rock) she's in my personal bouquet of wretched girlies with baru cormorant for a reason...

B) What inspired you to create them?

time honored tradition of fandom au that got out of fucking hand 🫡 haikyuu au with the highschool bestie, we cooked up a big kingdoms+fantasy setting thru like 2016-2018 and then i continued going feral over a handful of characters that lived rent free in my mind for the next. three years ish? before i finally was like ok i should make it official and stop calling these bitches the names of anime characters. For ayirine specifically some of her core traits have been there since the beginning (foresight, dead twin, death by drowning, kills her best friend) but since filing off serial numbers i transed her gender and made her more actively suicidal (its themes. sorry) and REALLY WEIRD re: her religious convictions. also structurally she's become a prequel tragedy / cautionary tale preceding the main chunk of the narrative, which, not that we had a lot of structure before due to being high schoolers just having fun worldbuilding, but her killing her best friend used to be a W for the then-protagonists bc he was the leader of their enemy, et cetera. by now ive wandered entirely away from the adversarial narrative and into the weeds of other stuff i can personally tell a better story about, due to having Many Thoughts Head Full. i like putting together stories that are dioramas of people and their strange selves much more now than i did when i was a #teen and mostly just liked cool settings and shit. now im like if the characters in the setting arent fascinating then well i almost dont care how cool it is. 

ok swag that wasnt as interminably long as i thought it was. no readmore then (gestures to followers) Look at my melodramatic oc boy

[katatonicimpression]

Salty comics ask: 2,3,5,7, 11, 21, 38. If you feel like it. Character(s) of your choice.

2. What character death for the sake of drama was the worst?

Everett's is pretty bad. They announce that he's dead, then proceed to do an entire 4 issue arc that has nothing to do with him before even explaining what happened. Then, after the explainer, they barely mention him. And I think actually the fact that (similar to the Hellions), his resurrection on Krakoa hasn't featured any of that angst or drama because it's not the direction they want to go with Emma..

But yeah. Transparently done for the drama, to raise the stakes. And, much like with Thunderbird or Darwin in the First Class film, it's a tired racist trope.

3. Who is your most hated comics writer?

Gezza D.

Although, there's definitely overall worse writers out there. There are some attrocious comics that I've struggled through. But in general, I'm not one for going out of my way to look up who the writers and artists are for everything I look at. If I remember their name, I remember their name.

And I genuinely think it's not good to get too fixated on these figures, especially when you don't like their work. I've been hyper aware of how fucked up even the valid criticism can get, when it's relentless, large scale and directed at a single person.

So, I guess I'm saying that I hope Gerry doesn't have tumblr.

5. Who mischaracterized [x] the worst?

Monet? Cullen Bunn wrote Uncanny X-Men (2016) so fuck that guy I guess.

Bobby? Whoever had the idea to pair him up with Mystique.

7. What “throwaway” character could they have done more with?

Ooh, there's a lot of good answers to this.

I'll put forward Mel from that first Cap storyline with Nightshade. No reason why they couldn't bring that back and make more out of it, even if he's dead.

Mindmeld. Interestingly, the new character of Escapade is also a trans woman with similar conciousness transfering powers. But they're hardly similar outside of that; there's plenty of room. Bring back Mindmeld.

11. What’s the worst art you’ve seen?

I saw your post with the Greg Land examples. Seconded.

A lot of Liefeld options, obviously.

Sometimes it feels pretty mean to harp on art for not being so good. I get the "they're professionals, they got paid for this" argument, but whatever. Hell, sometimes I like it when the art looks kind of shitty because it gives me hope for my own lol.

But I will say that, for me, when it's that more realistic and hyper-smooth style that was big in the 2005-2015 era, that's when I have the least sympathy. There's so much technical competence on display and yet so often, really poor compositions of the panels and just a sub zero taste level. So yeah, Greg Land.

21. Who’s the most overhyped villain excluding the Joker?

Thanos was more entertaining in his early days when he was goofier.

I think it makes sense that the MCU used him as their first Big Bad, but I personally do not care about him or take him seriously as an existential threat in the slightest lol.

And specifically, I think the effort to rebrand him as a serious, universe destroying, massive big serious scary, manly man scary villain, makes him less fun. And because of the movies, they're going to keep him as the biggest of big bads forever now. Boo.

38. What character that was reduced to a love interest deserves so much better?

Honestly the phrase "reduced to a love interest" is not one I associate with good faith arguments (see: MCU Sharon hate), but there's something to it sometimes.

Most of the examples I can think of are temporary (e.g. Monet is a love interest in Weapon X-Force, Rachel is basically just a love interest in Captain Britain - The former was awful and the latter is... fine). It's not always an issue when it's temporary and done well, but is a problem if it's a rut the character gets stuck in when they're only "so-and-so's partner", or if they're really ooc or the writing is insulting etc... It also doesn't count if they were only ever conceived of as a love interest.

Weirdly, the only character I can think of that this has definitely happened to is Layla Miller, who hasn't been a character outside of Jamie's wife and a mother to their kid for like a decade.

I'm sure there are better examples, I'm just drawing a blank.

[maedosono]

This year I ended my relationship with my boyfriend (we met and started dating around 2016 until 2024, with occasional breakups along the way).

We met when we were 18-19, in college (I was, by the way, he was trying to get into med school). We fell in love quickly, intensely, without warning. I lost my virginity in a way I never planned more perfectly - I really fell in love with him.

He got into med school in another state, our relationship was miles apart. We talked to each other every minute we could. We had webcam sex, watched movies, talked about books, talked about all the things he wrote (and my god, he is an amazing writer). I firmly believed that nothing would bring us down.

But for some random reason, I was really uncomfortable with a friend of his, her name would randomly come up every now and then. She made me jealous, even if he didn't give me a reason to.

We had been together for so long. We explored our lives and grew. In the end, our breakup was very traumatic (I think it was for both of us, actually), and in the past I always believed that we would get back together at some point - it always happened that way, right?

but this time something changed, I got tired of trying, of giving in, of being patient. It's not worth it anymore, even with all the feelings. We broke up, and this time I really think it's over.

But I confess, and I think I deserve the right to talk about it, on a social network, he unfollowed all of his "friends", except me, and for some reason (yes, maybe longing), I accessed his profile and he unfollowed me and started following exactly that friend who made me jealous. I confess that this hurt me, I'm not going to lie here. I have no reason.

A few weeks ago, I sent him a message: look at the situation

day 2 - my father had a very serious accident;

day 3 - it was my birthday, a day when I'm feeling overwhelmed with everything and,

day 5 was my master's defense. this sequence almost made me feel crazy.

i don't know if there are numbers in this universe to count all the tears i've shed in those days and i sent him a message in a strange way, it was the need to find some sense of security and clear up some doubts about my father's medical condition. and he replied. he cleared up all my doubts and for that i will always be grateful.

he's not a bad person, he was the love of my life for almost 8 years.

and i don't want to remember him for the problem with his friend. i always believed that when we eventually broke up (and i always knew that it happened) i would only keep the good memories, but i don't know, it seems that (yes, maybe it's just paranoia) he won the grand prize in the end, the gold medal, and what he wants is - and all the time with me was a kind of reserve.

and look, because of that boy, i spent a lot of time suffering (partly my fault, partly his fault). I think that this ending, although not the most painful act, was the most striking. It goes back to the beginning of our whole act together. But incredibly I can't cry or mourn.

For me, it has always been very strange to put everything about this relationship into words because so much happened. Sometimes I am torn between the wish I had never lived through all this and gratitude for the experience.

Ps: if my friends only imagine this relate I am a girly dead

[buckybarnesss]

The Court TV docuseries OJ25 (2020) is the best and most truthful account of the trial.

https://www.vulture.com/2016/04/oj-juror-people-v-oj-simpson-right-and-wrong.html

I guess maybe black people cheering was less about O.J. and more about the politics of the LAPD at the time, police brutality. A lot of their catharsis was bigger than O.J. I can understand that. But at the end of the day, two people were murdered.

I think most people thought we based our decision on race. Race never came up in the topic of our deliberation, or even how the LAPD treated black people.

Like, regarding Fuhrman, none of his comments really …

The thing with Fuhrman was once his credibility was shot, you really could discount anything he said. He was definitely a liar — he lied on the stand — and when he came back to the court, he took the fifth on everything. Why would you trust anything he said? He was the detective that found all this evidence: the blood on the Bronco, on the back fence, on the glove … all of that created reasonable doubt.

Was there a moment in particular during the trial that really swayed your decision towards reasonable doubt?

Yeah, when they started talking about the blood evidence. There was, like, a milliliter of blood they couldn’t account for. And they found blood on the back fence of Nicole’s condo, and that particular blood also had the additive in there. That additive is only found in [a test tube of blood], so why would the blood sample on that back fence contain that additive unless somebody took the blood from the test tube and placed it there?

Do you think O.J. was framed?

I don’t know if he was necessarily framed. I think O.J. may know something about what happened, but I just don’t think he did it. I think it was more than one person, just because of the way she was killed. I don’t know how he could have just left that bloody scene — because it was bloody — and got back into his Bronco and not have it filled with blood. And then go back home and go in the front door, up the stairs to his bedroom … That carpet was snow white in his house. He should have blood all over him or bruises because Ron Goldman was definitely fighting for his life. He had defensive cuts on his shoes and on his hands.

O.J. only had that little cut on his finger. If [Goldman] was kicking to death, you would think that the killer would have gotten some bruises on his body. They showed us photos of O.J. with just his underwear just two days after, and he had no bruises or anything on his body.

anon i have no idea why you sent this to me as i don't recall posting anything about oj simpson.

oj simpson was guilty as goddamn sin in the murder of his ex wife nicole brown simpson and ronald goldman. it was an escalation of documented domestic violence against nicole by oj and poor ronald goldman was genuinely in the wrong place at the wrong time.

oj was found liable in the civil trial and this may be a controversial statement but the murder trial was bungled terribly by the prosecution. there was evidence that was omitted that could've proven useful and hindsight is a powerful thing. the juror's perspective is only useful for what they knew and experienced.

the prosecution did not prove beyond a reasonable doubt he committed the crime and let the defense make a theatrical show of it. the same thing happened with casey anthony.

i'm not here to teach you or anyone the ins and outs of this case because it's all readily available online but i'll say his so-called hypothetical scenario in the if i did it book is not the sign of an innocent man. combining that with many interviews and hell just look at his face when confronted with the bruno magli shoes is incredibly damning.

no matter how you look at it nicole and ron never got the justice they deserved.

[administer-distractions]

ramble about rwby please

oh a request u will likely regret but i will gladly oblige. it's a good thing ur asking me now though. If u had asked me in like 2016 I would've gone fucking ballistic. I was obsessed obsessed during volumes like 3-5. That was the time when I like wrote fanfics and made literally not exaggerating 40 full fledged rwby ocs with two of my friends.

i love rwby. back then I was rabid about it being basically flawless. I loved 4-6 and never understood the people who called it boring. looking back I get it but I still really enjoyed them. now I am more critical of media and actually really disliked volume 8. so much so that I went into volume 9 with my expectations a lot lower than normal. I honestly kind of was worried I wouldn't be into it. Yea turns out I think this is just My Show. I'm still watching it every Saturday. accidentally paid for a month of crunchyroll cause I couldn't find a decent 🏴‍☠️ website but it is what it is. I think I just love this show like. Fundamentally.

I'm enjoying volume 9 so far. Even though I do still hate 🐝 but that's another story. But the rest of it is a lot of fun. I glad the Ruby Rose Depression Era has finally begun. My poor girl has been through so much. This was inevitable and I'm honestly stoked to see her when she comes out the other side.

Weiss is best girl. For a while I thought it was Yang but no. It's Weiss. Sorry. I love her so much. Everything she does is iconic she's so funny but also she's got so much emotion to her. I like. Cannot get into it how much I love everything about Weiss.

Blake I have the most complicated feelings about because I feel like so much of her story has been twisted around Yang in a way that's distorted her. I feel like a can't get a good grasp of who Blake really is anymore. It's part of why I don't like 🐝 I like Blake. I just think I used to like her a lot more.

Yang I also love though. Like I said she used to be my fave. I think she's extremely interesting and complex. Yang has changed a lot like Blake but, the difference I think with Yang is that it feels more like growth and development as opposed to this sort of. Total tone shift that Blake has had. I used to use I Burn as an alarm. That was a mistake.

Honestly though I just really thought Ironwood got done so dirty. He didn't deserve any of that. I could've gone into this in real depth after it first came out but I've forgotten a lot of the details by now but like.

Ironwood was nothing but helpful since we first met him. Especially after they get to Atlas. And they kinda treated him like shit. And then he goes SO hard the other way in volume 8 and it felt so out of character. Not to mention I felt like everything team rwby did was honestly super stupid just. The whole time. I really didn't like volume 8.

I could keep going but I guess these are my surface level RWBY thoughts. Anyway. If they don't bring Sun back to me in this volume I'm going to take michael jones hostage I swear to fucking god

[sizzlingpatrolfox]

Hello, I hope you're doing well. I want to ask a question since you said you're in fandom for years now, I'm seeing this whole mess of jimin wants to go solo Vs not. I don't know whether he said anything about his solo career in past, when I got into fandom I saw that he said he wants to be in BTS for 20yrs (if I remember correctly) but again I saw suga and recently Kookie also said on the same lines of wanting to be with group as well so why this blowing up where I'm seeing or getting vibes that some fans really hell bent on saying he doesn't want/not interested in solo work? So if you remember did he said anything like that in the past? Or just fans/disguised antis spreading lies? Thank you :)

- I always laugh when I see fans say “jimin wants to be with them forever he’ll never leave” hmm from the looks of things he might be the first to jump ship. They also thought he wouldn’t be the first to get tattoos.

---

Hiii.

I don't know where to start, honestly. Feels like it's a topic that could be talked about from a few different angles and I also really respect everyone's opinions, like anon 2, even if I don't share the same sentiment.

To my knowledge, this reply in a fansign post it back in 2016 is pretty much the only time Jimin has ever alluded to wanting or thinking about a solo career.

Some may also use the argument that he has said talked about armys and fans separately, as if he was talking about fans of his alone. Personally, I think he just meant people who aren't hardcore BTS stans but still like them, so regular fans. I do think tho that he has created a brand with his 13; he's not stupid, he knows we know he associates himself with the number, and he knows we also associate him with the number. It's the reason he put that number in the hoodie and in his earrings. Even if he initially didn't intend for it to become a thing, it has caught on and he knows it and has embraced it. It is a personal brand.

To begin with, a solo career doesn't mean leaving the group. You can have, in fact, most idols do have a solo career on side of being a member of a group. Namjoon and Yoongi have had solo careers since 2015.

There's an element of ego to the whole discussion, to be honest. For some reason, the fandom has taken it against Jimin solo stans. It's always been this way, and I don't think I'm even exaggerating. Do you see Jungkook solos or Taehyung solos or even taekookers getting mass quoted and laughed at, as much as Jimin solos do? No. It's always PJMs the center of every solos discussion. Even jikookers acknowledge other solos only when it's ship stuff. For some reason, army has decided PJMs are the root of all evil and they deserve to die meanwhile for taekookers and other akgaes is "block and report blablabla". I don't know if they've even realized yet that it was JK solos th akgaes taekookers the ones who've been trying to create and spread the voice about Jimin's "scandals". This thing with the man credited in Filter? I've seen taekookers/JK stans/TH stans using it as something Jimin should be held responsible since late 2020. They've been trying to pin it on Jimin for a good couple of years now.

The very same "army" has somewhat ostracized Jimin from the concept of a solo career. So PJMs can't say that Jimin would have be great as a solo act but "army" is totally allowed to say stuff like this. Yes, it's from 2018 but the same discourse keeps getting repeated and passed on even today in 2022.

(It's pretty clear to me exactly whose stan this was).

I can't possibly link every tweet that i find, sorry (I just typed Jimin solo career into the search bar) but for years "army" has had no problem talking about everyone having their own solo careers, except for when it comes to Jimin.

Everyone is looking out for their own interests, solos want to see Jimin do everything he's capable of and shine in everyway, which I agree with, while armys want to do everything in their power to keep the ot7 going on forever and ever. Like I've said, solo careers don't mean the group's disbandment, rapline already have solo careers, they've had them since 2015 and it's accepted and even celebrated. I guess within the maknae line, there's competition between them and armys don't like competition if they can't control it. So Yoongi and Namjoon and Hoseok solo careers are okay because they will all do relatively similar on streams and charts, etc. but maknae line stans will try to up-do each other everytime, and in turn, they up-do the group's achievements, too. You know that billboard song hashtag, I've seen armys say that they should push back against Jimin's stans and keep using the butter hashtag to protect the group's artistry and not let it be overshadowed by a member's work. Do they realize how insane they sound. Butter. Hashtags. A song that was released a year ago and half the fandom hated. Acting like Jimin is the competition. With you is so much better than butter objectively speaking. Rapline are on the bottom of the popularity list, if there was such a list. Maknae line are topping it, and armys actually feel threatened that anyone of them alone could be bigger than BTS. Like I've said, everyone's looking out after their own interests. Jikookers and shippers in general too will go batshit if Jimin or Jungkook ever have solo careers and they have solo schedules and we probably won't see them together again. If they don't enlist all seven, there's a chance next year or the next, that's exactly what's going to happen.

Jimin would never leave BTS. Even if he wants out, for whatever reason, he wouldn't walk away from it as it's still going. He would wait for it to run its course and once it's all been said and done, he would move on. He wouldn't leave while the machine is still running. He cares too much about BTS, about everyone in the band, he has built a life around BTS. He geniunely loves the team. As anyone, he might be exhausted just because that's how life is, and he maybe doesn't agree with things the company wants them doing, but that's the business. I would bet all of them don't agree with everything the company says. They don't even agree with each other sometimes.

Jimin says he wants to be with BTS because he loves it and everything it encompasses. For now, that's enough for him. If Taehyung or the rapline feel like they can show more, and aren't satisfied with what they're doing as members of BTS, then that's also on them and it's valid if they want to try out different things and release additional music that they feel, represents them better than BTS music.

Something interesting, is that apart from Yoongi, the rest of the members really don't have that much "official solo work" and the few stuff they have, it actually did relatively and barely good on charts and all that. But still for some reason people think having two OSTs out means you're a consolidated solo artist. Newsflash, you're not. Everytime army see a PROD. SUGA is coming they lose their minds and then turn around and say Jimin loses everything if he's not with BTS.

Hoseok seems only interested in collabs as long as he can include them in his work. So far, he has never had a song for another artist like Yoongi has. Yoongi won't keep being an idol once or if ever BTS is over, he will stay producing and featuring in other people's songs, and releasing his own solo stuff every now and then just as he has been doing. When Yoongi songs get rejected by the company, or he himself makes a song and halfway realizes it doesn't fit BTS, he takes them to another artist. He took That That to PSY and PSY accepted it.

Jimin also makes his own songs, and sometimes they get rejected too, the difference is that Jimin doesn't give those songs to other people. Maybe he's keeping them for when he can release them on his own in the future or when BTS can use them. He also doesn't talk about them like Taehyung does, so people think he's not doing anything just because he doesn't go online to say "ooops so sad another song I have to delete everyone say byebye!!!". And everyone is omg he's so hardworking another song he won't ever release, he's such a dedicated solo artist, meanwhile Jimin is a lazy fuck who has no interest in music even if Tae has the same amount of released solo songs as Jimin and everything else he seems to throw it away. King.

I really don't have a problem with people thinking he sould be a solo artist, as well as I don't have a problem with those who think he isn't interested in a solo career. But it is a problem when people jump on any chance to undermine his character and talents only because he doesn't talk about when there's nothing to show for it. All of these years, Jimin has always released songs that nobody knew he was working on. And just because he apparently wasn't interested in recording a song for a drama at the time, it doesn't mean he would be opposed to his own solo song that he can show with a performance and MV and proper promo, like his solo songs in BTS discography.

I've talked about something similar before:

It's also valid if, when BTS time is over, Jimin doesn't want to be a celebrity or a singer dancer anymore; it's valid if he wants to maybe give himself the chance to meet someone and fall in love and settle down and have a family. Or if he just wants to get away from idol life in general, or if he wants to travel with friends around the world.

Honestly, for me, Jimin is right now the only one who could hold a concert by himself, or at least some type of show. I do think it would be a wasted opportunity of incredible talent and showmanship if he never shows more after BTS, but I also won't resent him if that's not what he wants or plans to do in the future.

😔 sometimes I worry about him.

[agent-cupcake]

Do you have favs among the english dub for three houses? Besides the obvious, of course.

YES

Favorites~

Alejandro Saab as Yuri: Perfect, there's basically no other word I could use to describe as accurately how effective his voice and performance were in this role. He shifts from aloof, sensual, cool, witty, and emotional without it feeling awkward. The way he talks under his breath or just casually pokes fun at people is so realistic and charming it doesn't even feel scripted. It's a shame there's not more of him, I'd have loved to see this role expanded specifically to get into the different aspects of Yuri's character that Saab delivered so pitch perfectly. I also just adore taking a very feminine-looking man and giving him this sexy masculine voice. The contrast of being both feminine and masculine is such a fun trait of Yuri's that is usually skewed towards one or the other, but he goes total Jia Baoyu and that's how it is. Love it.

Lucien Dodge as Felix: He fuels my voice kink. Don't get me wrong, Hackney's Dimitri does too, but Saab and Dodge's voices just hit, you know? Like, as far as raw... attractiveness(?) Yuri and Felix are the clear winners. And I love Dodge's performance too. The force of his scorn and disgust is genuinely biting and Dodge does a wonderful job of the sharp, brittle way Felix clings to his beliefs because he needs them to be true. And there's also this dorkiness that is so charming. It really sells him as an edgelord who says things not because they're actually cool, but because he thinks they're cool and that's who he needs to be in order to convince other people as well as himself of his unwavering strength. And, at the same time, he's oblivious and awkward. There are a lot of instances where Felix is cool and a lot where he is a dweeb and Dodge performed both of those really well.

Joe Zieja as Claude: Obvious. He's only going here because I had to remind everyone of my voice kink first and foremost. Zieja is really fun as well. Wholesome dad core. I mentioned that I really like Toshiyuki Toyonaga's Claude too which is true but Zieja gives him this personable charm that makes him both incredibly effective at sneakiness and an affable friendly facade which is exactly what he needs. Overall, I'd say he tends a little more towards dorky? But I also really like that interpretation of Claude, he's a very eclectic mix of intelligent, kind, disrespectful, funny, and laid-back (or pretending to be) that makes it easy to believe he's this charismatic mastermind that makes a game of balancing politics. It's really fun early game because he's got a "you can trust me :)" voice while everything else kinda hints that you can't.

Joe Brogie as Sylvain: Listen. Look up Joe Brogie. He's on Instagram and did some anime impulse things a while back on youtube. Like, that's not why I'm enthralled by his performance as Sylvain but it helps. Anyway. Sylvain is both a fuck boy and a bro and Brogie captures both really well. He's another that feels really natural, like it's just a conversation with someone. Except for his terrible, terrible pickup lines but the schmoozy asshole way he delivers those is great. Brogie, in my opinion, makes Sylvain really likable in places where he's really not and is convincing with the emotional beats. The way he tells the off-color jokes deserves a mention as well.

Billy Kametz as Ferdinand: One time I was hanging out in a stream of his and my friend gifted me whatever it is that your name is on the screen and he said it and some anon messaged me after asking if it was me. That is, no joke, the height of my career. Anyway. He's great! I love his Disney prince voice and have watched the 2016 Aladdin stage show more than once because I am cringy. Ferdinand is just a Disney prince because of Billy Kametz and it makes me unreasonably happy. As far as favorite sounding voice, just the way they sound, Billy Kametz (and Ferdinand by extension) is definitely is my number one.

Honorable Mentions~

Robbie Daymond as Hubert: Sexy laugh + I like it a lot when he threatens people. Like, he did a really good job but also that.

Chris Patton as Linhardt: The best thing about Linhardt, probably. His sass is everything.

Allegra Clark as Shamir and Dorothea: Allegra Clark is wonderful and her work for both ladies is over half of the reason I like them.

Kirsten Day as Constance: HER LAUGH! She sounds like Barbie and I love it so much, Constance von Nuvelle Supremacy.

Mark Whitten as Seteth: The battle at Garreg Mach if you kill Flayn. I don't have a link but if you know you know and if you don't, look it up.

I know there are others I enjoy but these are my faves off the top of my head. I think a lot of the voice actors gave fantastic performances and I applaud their work!

[marshmallowprotection]

Would SE Saeran allow Mc to take photos with him. Similar to how GE loves taking pictures together with MC, I was wondering if SE would allow that too? I would love to just have a picture of me kissing his cheek while he looks at the phone camera, (like how MC kissed GE in the passport book) I’d save it as my Home Screen. Or even off guard photos of him staring at the sky or looking at flowers. But I would never want to do that, if he’s uncomfortable with it.

And idk if this makes sense bc this is slightly off topic, but although SE sees himself as someone tainted, I can image he looks at the sky and nature with childlike wonder and purity, that’s a sight I would love taking pictures of. I just never viewed him as someone corrupted, just a victim of a corrupted system yknow? I just think he’d look ethereal, admiring the nature around him. Or even the idea of making him fully laugh, not just chuckle, would probably be the end of me. Your Iris fanfic has dragged me into remembering my 2016 crush on this man, you can’t keep catching me Lackin like this. Reminding me why I love SE just as much as GE.

SE Saeran is wholeheartedly a victim of his environment. He struggles a lot to make sense of everything that he went through and there are the good days and bad days. There are times when he doesn't know what to do with himself. It's hard for him to be able to focus on what he's supposed to do when he never planned for anything to happen after he got his revenge. 

As it turned out, revenge isn't something that was going to make him happy. It also wasn't going to sustain him. Going through that realization and crisis definitely weighed on his shoulders. He tends to keep away from other people because he doesn't understand them and he doesn't want to repeat what he already went through.

He has a lot of trust issues. That doesn't mean everybody is out to get him or hurt him. It just means that he has a hard time believing that anybody has good intentions in their heart. Every time he got close to someone who promised him something good, it wound up blowing up in his face. 

He was tricked and used for everything that he was worth, and for nothing. You're the only person that he feels like he can be close to because you don't overwhelm him or pressure him to be someone that he isn't. You let him set the stage and the pace. He gets to decide what's okay for him and you always make sure to confirm his consent before anything happens. It works so well because you just know how to click with each other.

It's taken him a long time to be able to look in the mirror. He really doesn't like the way that he looks. 

There's a reason why he bleached his hair so aggressively that it took months for it to fade out. He has a hard time looking at himself because now all that he can see is somebody who did something that he can never take away or take back. 

That can be really difficult to stomach sometimes and it just reminds him of everything that he's trying to run away from. He is trying to move forward but it's hands are covered in blood every night that he wakes up from a nightmare. He is getting help with these things in therapy but it takes a lot of time and care.

He isn't even really around technology that much anymore if he can help it because it just isn't something that he wants to deal with. He just wants to go outside and look at the sky as much as he wants. That's all that he wants to do. It may not be exciting or overwhelming, but it's what makes him happy and really after everything he went through, it's what he deserves. You seem to understand that and support it.

So, take photos with him... he’s okay with it. It’s a reminder that he’s free and he can be happy with you. He doesn’t have many photos but he likes to take them of you more than anything. He has photos of what he loves and you’re in that, he only takes photos when you’re in them with him, or when you ask him. It’s just a gift for you since he knows that he has a lot of limitations that may make you sad to realize. 

A rare smile will appear on his lips when he sees your home screen is the two of you. 

[andydreamzzzz]

Monday 9.26.22

The world is really falling apart today, holy shit. Fascist Italians, a hurricane landing by the end of the week where I live, 100 SECONDS to midnight- possibly less, total abortion bans in Arizona and I'm both equal parts scared and enraged.

But I also had a fantastic work presentation today, in which I had to speak for about 45 minutes to a room full of men, and then proceeded to answer their questions for an additional hour and a half, because you know they weren't really listening in the first place. I'm proud of myself! I worked hard on that.

Anywhooo, about me: I have a grown up job, I own a house, I'm married to my high school sweetheart who I've been with now for 15 YEARS, and whom I love so deeply- it is only getting better (I'm so sorry, that part of my life really is such a fairytale, and I never want to come across as 'too happy' about it because it's a very obnoxious thing to brag about hahaha). That makes me 33, in case you're trying to do the math. Not interested in children, just vibing, navigating life with my best friend in the world (I feel the need to apologize again here lol)

I became a 'real' fan of MCR when the world got a little darker back in 2016 after the Trump election. Since then, the sadness I'd felt, built into a rage that has broken my heart again and again over the years, and I'm sure I'm not alone in that transformation. Through out those years I re-discovered my love of music and art, and finding Frank's music in particular was like a lightbulb moment. Frank's art helped me understand, that it is possible to be angry and hopeful, and to honor the pain we carry while we push forward. I think I also needed to find examples of men in rock music that weren't horrible people towards women in general lol. But yeah, that also has been immensely healing to me. His music created the space I needed to feel as angry as I've continued to feel, and to not be judged, or feel bad about it. We live in insanely cruel times, and now is the moment to see the world for what it is and not for the lies we tell ourselves as a nation and/or as people. Frank is good at that, he's never idle, his passion is powerful and I am constantly inspired by him. MCR creates the same type of space as Frank's music does, the same space to feel angry and feel accepted and even validated for it.

Anyways, now I'm on tumblr and down the rabbit hole, so I don't really know what that means for me to be honest hahaha. But I've had such a packed day full of emotions, that I just felt like sharing I guess.

Also on that note, let's be grateful for hyper-fixations since they happen to be privileged hobbies. And also, I think we should all take the time to find hope and inspiration outside of these men as well. For example for me, as a cis woman that is also a POC, they can't be everything. It's important that I support other women who kick ass and help me see beyond myself- like Serena Williams for example. And to have a list of queer people that deserve our support who are living their lives out of the closet and fighting for the rights of all the minorities that make up this fandom.

Oh! You should also watch Hasan Piker, in case he’s not currently part of your media consumption :)

[inacatastrophicmind]

Hi I went through few cons and I actually got my heart broken a little bit. Every one of them had Jensen denying the idea of Destiel or Dean being anything but the American male fantasy.

Vancon 2012 J2 panel he avoids the fan who is screaming Destiel. I understand that because he was going through something Misha shaped during 2012. Destiel was the last thing he wanted in his life then.

The controversial NJCon 2013 where he pretty much rudely avoids the Bi Dean question. I mean come on there were so many ways to back down there but just giving into that crowd like that and shooting down that girl who asked the question? I know she actually explained what happened there but he is saying things to convey he is unhappy where that question is heading. JP who is considered the immature even is considering answering the question the girl is continuously apologising it is a horror show there while Jensen is just being plain rude.

Jib 2014 solo panel where he is asked if Dean will ever get his pie. And he denies Cas ever being there at the end of the line. And ironically at the end, he was only there with all kinds of pie but no Cas. Amazing how life worked out for him.

Jib 2015 solo panel where he again denies both CasDean and Destiel from Fan Fiction episode. JPad was not there and Jensen was in a bad mood so maybe it had something to do with that.

Chicon 2016 he again invalidates Cas when a question is asked about him Cas and Mary.

TorCon 2016 where both Js are denying Cas's importance saying there's no necessity for him.

JaxCon 2017 he pretty much shoots down Destiel by saying Destiel doesn't exist.

In JaxCon 2018 he wrote NO infront of Bi Dean research paper a fan showed him.

Jibcon 2019 he asks audience Where does Destiel exist. but I think he was much like teasing the audience there tbh. No major harm but it still hurts.

I just.. I truly believe he knows what he and Misha were doing in the Destiel implied scenes. And now the cat is pretty much out of the bag. But still Jensen is pretty much staying on his ground and it is nice he is now more open for interpretation but the strength this fandom should have to forgive him for all he did...

I believe in Karma. I think Karma got to Jensen eventually for all hurt he did by those words to the fandom. I don't hate Jensen in fact I really adore the guy. But it doesn't mean I am not upset by his words. How I think Karma worked here is that he never embraced what he was portraying as a character and Karma finally said "Okay Dude enough foreplay.. You want pie okay here's pie and your car now die and be in heaven and your character arc is in garbage but your brother gets to live. There goes your male fantasy.."

I understand if he had internalized sexuality issues of himself that he didn't feel like exposing by talking about Dean and Destiel but still there are much better ways to shoot down fan opinions without being so rude.

In 2014 he pretty much says that at the end of the series Dean might get all kinds of pie with no Castiel and...Geez Is it not what exactly happened? No Cas and Pie on his face. Accidental foreshadowing spoilers..

I think he got Karma for hurting so many fan hearts and denying something he evidently portrayed in his character. At the end he didn't get a happy ending he got robbed by his own show. While the shippers actually got something out of it Thanks to Misha.

I don't need Jensen to embrace Destiel in an open hug because not in any universe that's gonna happen. I actually hoped he would eventually be open to it. He actually might be, considering his reaction to episode 18. But there's no proof actually footage of him saying anything positive about Destiel. It just... is such a bummer.

I know Jensen is hurt for his own reasons by his own show which actually hurt him in ways no fan ever did. I hope he understands how fans feel now being betrayed by a show they love.

May be he had the Karma coming..

In the past, Jensen hasn't been Destiel's biggest fan, and that's something that has always bothered me. Not because I didn't respect that he didn't like Destiel, but because every time Destiel was brought up, he was kind of rude. The same thing happened with anyone mentioned Dean being bi. It sucked and hurt because he could have handled it better. He could have easily said "I don't see Destiel/Dean as bi, but it's okay if you do". It's just that simple.

I don't know why Jensen was so rude about Destiel or bi!Dean. I don't know if it was of something personal or because certain fans were rude to him when they brought up Destiel and bi!Dean, or if he was scared that Dean would change if Destiel happened, because society and media think that anyone who belongs to the LGBTQIA+ community's personality is just their sexuality and gender and nothing else, so maybe Jensen was afraid that Dean would just become a character that was bi and that everything else that Dean was would disappear. Or maybe it had to do with the fact that he grew up in Texas, which isn't the most liberal place. It could be anything.

However, since they started filming s15 and when he found out about Cas' confesion, he has been really supportive about Destiel. He might not be as vocal and supportive as Misha is, but you can see the change. And that's important. Even at a JIBcon, (I can't remember which one), after he haid said something negative about Destiel the previous year, he apologized. He knows how important Destiel is for a lot of us. And he has learnt from his past behavior. Even if he doesn't fully support it, he now knows that it means a lot to a lot of people and he isn't rude about it anymore and he respects it.

Also, I should mention that in most cons, all the panels that involve either Jensen, Misha and/or J*red are moderated, and 90% of them forbid Destiel questions. So I don't know what the cons organizers tell the actors to say when Destiel is brought up, or if anyone from the network forbids them to talk about it, but unfortunately, Destiel has been considered a taboo topic by TPTB, and that might have also affected on the way Jensen reacted any time Destiel or bi!Dean was mentioned. Although I still think he should have handled it better, but at least, he now seems to be on good terms with the topics, and as I mentioned above, that's really important.

As for the Cas thing, about how both Jensen and J*red always joked how he didn't matter, it's a joke that's been going for too long, and that's all it is. They have taken it way too far, especially J*red, because most of the times, when Jensen is talking without J*red by his side, he always brings up Cas and how important he is. Just look at some of the interviews he has done over the years.

With that said, I think you're being mean about the whole karma thing. What the writers did to Dean was just the writers being shitty writers. They wrote a whole season with the only goal of killing Dean. After Dean has finally found the will to live, after he is finally able to live on his own terms, the writers decided that killing him was a good way to end the story. That's not karma; that's bad storytelling.

And just because Jensen didn't handle Destiel or bi!Dean in a good way, it doesn't mean that he deserved to have Dean treated like shit. And I think that what you're suggesting is actually quite mean.

Jensen might have made mistakes in the past regarding Destiel and bi!Dean, but he seems to have grown and realized that he can't be that rude. It's not hard at all to accept that people love Destiel and bi!Dean, even if he doesn't. And he has gotten there. So accept that and don't be mean.

[golbrocklovely]

colby's halloween costumes 2013-2020

certain things that i planned to post fell through, but luckily for me an anon asked "I feel like you'd be the one capable of doing this. Can you make a compilation separately of Sam and Colbys costumes over the years?" and since it fits right in with what i've been posting, i figured i would post this instead of what i was planning to post because not everything works in my favor, apparently lol

so now i present to you, colby's halloween costumes thru the years

(i might have missed one or two, but i'm pretty sure this is all of them)

also... i'm gonna rate them for shits and gigs lol

here's a bonus one out the gate. apparently, he dressed up as andy biersack back somewhere in between (what i think is) 2010-12

honestly.... he kinda just looks like any kid that shopped at a mixture of hot topic, spencers, and zumiez so... i guess that can work for andy sixx

rating: 2/5 literally just looks like something he and i would wear now lol

starting off in 2013, colby had an... interesting choice of a costume. i think he's supposed to be a sexy lumberjack.

i'll be honest, even tho the costume itself isn't anything more than clothes he already owned, the idea is interesting. so i'll give him the benefit of the doubt with this one. also... he looks like a baby so i have to forgive him.

rating: 3/5, cute, kinda silly, much like his younger self lol

while i couldn't find out what costume sam wore in 2014, colby apparently dressed up as a... vampire baseball player???? it's hard to tell what exactly he's going for. bc in one photo he's wearing the fangs, and then in the other he now has on a royals shirt (i'm pretty sure he went to a royals game... but still i'm confused lmao)

while i don't understand what he's trying to be, i give him props for it. also it's the only time he wore fangs and tried to look like a vampire so... i guess i'll take what i can get.

rating: 3/5 just for the fact that he was a vampire alone. also contacts are a bitch so he deserves some credit for that.

in 2015 he and sam dressed in a couples costume. they were mario and luigi.

the fact that both of the boys used black tape instead of buying suspenders... is still funny and weird to me. plus they got the outfits wrong.

but again, i'm giving them the benefit of the doubt with these costumes bc i can see the attempt.

rating: 2/5, dumb costume, but an enjoyable execution lol

2016 was the beginning of colby using face makeup to have that skull face thing. he also rewore the sexy lumberjack costume.

sorry for the trash taylor jumpscare.

i think the face makeup and the eyeliner really brings out his eyes. i don't think it looks that bad, and it's kinda cute to some degree. the sexy lumberjack costume got more matchy so that's fun. both costumes are lazy, but in basically the same way. but at least the face makeup took time lol

skull face rating: 3/5

sexy lumberjack repeat rating: 2/5

2017 he had no costume because he was in egypt with tfil.

2018, i would say, was the most interesting costume he has worn in recent years. it's so fucking weird, but i kinda love it for that reason.

idk what strain of ~devil's lettuce~ he smoked to either make this outfit or think up this outfit, but... give me some next time when i can't come up with something creative lol while this costume is barely a costume, the fact that he straight wore a pig on his head is just hilarious to me. i need to know so much about this costume. did he come up with it himself? did he make it? did someone else make it for him? does he still have a piggy headband? can i have it if he does?

rating: 10/5 so fucking stupid i love him lmao

i think 2019 was weirdly confusing as a costume, but it made sense once 'country road' came out.

i'm assuming his costume is an emo cowboy. yallternative if you will

at the time it didn't make sense, but i will say this is probably the hottest he's looked in a costume. and again, i gotta be honest, i love eyeliner on him. it brings out his eyes and also it's hot.

this is what happens when pete wentz has been your crush since you were 10 years old.

rating: 4/5, creative, kinda lazy but in a fun way

and finally for 2020, he repeated himself once more and dressed up as a skull face. but fun fact (and i completely forgot this happened) there was video of him, sam, and kat on some bus being driven somewhere with other ppl dressed up. his costume was just... his harness??? and idk if he was really wearing anything else that would be considered a costume. knowing him, he probably just called himself the dark lord or christian gray or some weird shit lol

while i think the face makeup this time around is nicer, repeating the same costume again... super fucking lazy.

i was literally thinking about this the other day, but he could easily make a grim reaper costume out of the clothes he has, by the weapon from a halloween store, and that would be more interesting than him painting a skull on his face.

throwing a bunch of random shit you have in your closet isn't a costume colby !!

skull face rating: 2/5

bondage/whatever the fuck he was dressed as rating: 0/5 no effort whatsoever

overall: if colby doesn't do something crazy this year with his costume... i'm flying to california, showing up at his house, and fighting him in his garage. mark my fucking words yall. how can you say halloween is your favorite holiday/time period, but not even remotely dress up??? you have all the fucking money colby, use it !! dress up like sora from kingdom hearts you pussy lmao

[experiment-000]

My Top 10 Ships of 2020

It's been a weird year but I've seen other people doing this. Plus this year I've been way more into gen fics (love a bit of found family especially in clone wars and marvel) than anything shippy. So I genuinely don't know what imma put on here aside from two ships for sure. Sorry this post is super long idk how to do the below the cut thing and I've had this app for 5 years...

10) Viktor Nikiforov and Yuuri Katsuki - Yuri!!! On Ice

It was a real toss up between this, supercorp, kanera and wolfstar cos they're all very integral ships to my fan heart but this son because of the Yuri on Ice fandom's rebirth this year. I've never stopped shipping this, never stopped reading fanfic of them for any extended period of time, they're still my most bookmarked ship on ao3 (although I think now star wars - all media types may have overtaken them for fandom). They were one of the first things I watched where the queer ship I loved became canon and I can't wait for the film (and hopefully someday a season 2). Heck I even made my mum watch Yuri on Ice with me so I think that says it all.

9) Edelgard Von Hresvelg and female Byleth - Fire Emblem: Three Houses

My first fire emblem game was fates when I was like 14 (and finally gay awake lol). I was so disappointed that I had to be with a guy character because the only female option was kinda creepy and also I wouldn't get the character of kana. So when three houses came out I was so happy because finally there were beautiful incredible female characters my female byleth could romance (I'm so sorry mlm you deserved so much more than you got). I got the game as soon as it came out (had to search a lot of shops let me tell you) and started on black eagles. I was actually kinda disappointed back in 2019. I didn't like the explore the monastery bit (still find it kinda tedious) and the battle mechanics weren't quite the same as fates (no pairing up?! Aka my main battle technique for protecting the weaker units). So I got like 20 hours in and put it down. Came back to it in lockdown and finally finished it! I'm so proud of myself I virtually never finish games. And I fully fell in love with the useless lesbian edelgard in the process. When I started back playing in 2020 I was like eh I wish I'd picked a different character to romance (like shes an emperor that's morally very shady) but then the romance stuff started with edelgard and I fell the heck in love.

8) Cory Matthews and Shawn Hunter (and Topanga Lawrence) - Boy Meets World

Disney+ was released in the UK this year and I finally got the opportunity to watch boy meets world in its best quality (aka not on YouTube). I watched it back when I was like 12 or 13 and it's such a nostalgic show for me. Watching it again I still absolutely adore it (and my bi ass was low-key crushing on Shawn especially in chick like me - I'm 18 btw and I got so scared for a sec but rider strong was 18 when chick like me came out so it's fine woah). And of course now I see the possibilities of the beautiful Cory and Shawn relationship like they were so bromance it was basically romance and throw in topanga it's the perfect ot3 (but I'm also fine with just Cory and Shawn or just Cory and Topanga). Read some good fanfic for them this year. My favourite was one about Shawn stealing makeup and stuff and exploring gender (need more fics like this I'm biiii).

7) Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes - Marvel Cinematic Universe

I rewatched all the MCU films this year too. And got really into Peter parker whump and irondad. Plus my eternal obsession with identity and relationship reveals of course led me from Spiderman identity reveals (and found family cuteness) to stucky coming out. Especially when it involves the internet and social media. Not my favourite ship but it's been significant to my year due to the sheer amount of marvel stuff I've read.

6) Satine Kryze and Obi Wan Kenobi - Star Wars

I rewatched clone wars in prep for season 7 and wow Satine's death was sad and sudden. She first appeared in S2 E13 I think and just the sheer sexual tension of their bickering. "The sarcasm of a soldier. The delusion of a dreamer." Just ugnnhhh my bi ass can't take much more of this. And Anakin just sipping his wine in the background grinning. And I fully believe korkie is a Kenobi.

5) Commander Cody and Obi Wan Kenobi - Star Wars

I am very much an Obi wan multishipper. I don't really have a favourite but I fully believe he was with satine and Quinlan in his life. I don't think be would've actually done anything with Cody because of the whole superior officer thing. And this probably isn't even my favourite Obi wan ship - that honour probably goes to quinobi or obitine. However the most popular ships in the fandom are codywan, quiobi and obikin. No offence to anyone who ships these they're just personally not to my taste, but I can't stand quiobi, and obikin I find only slightly more tolerable and I think that's just because there's so much obikin content so if I like the concept of a fic that happens to be obikin I'll read it. I'm just not a fan of the mentor/student relationships. So I generally favoured the codywan fics when there was shipping involved meaning I read a lot of them this year. Needed that nice fix it content post season 7.

4) Zuko and Katara - Avatar: the Last Airbender

Again I am a multishipper I have nothing against zukka it's cute. But I'm a zutara shipper first and foremost because when I first watched avatar I was like 13 and denying my gayness and gayness in general so I shipped the straight things and the straight things only. Most of these ships I stopped shipping - dramione, spuffy, some my little pony ones which we don't talk about. Zutara stayed. (I have nothing against any of the things I used to ship I just stopped shipping them so much/shipped new things more). I've continuously shipped zutara since I first watched avatar even if I didn't necessarily spend that much time on it it has always been here as one of my favourite ships. It has such good fanfic I swear including my favourite ever fanfic from any fandom - love thy enemy. Plus like the black games (reread this for the millionth time this year), a delicate subterfuge (which I read for the first time this year and damn it's so good) and so many more. With the avatar resurgence this year I haven't actually rewatched avatar aside from my normal random episode every now and then when I feel like it. But there's been a lot of avatar on my dash from people I follow getting into it and people I followed for avatar returning so naturally I returned to the fandom and read quite a lot of fanfic. I also read just a lot of avatar gen fics which were great at the whole found family thing I've been so obsessed with this year.

3) Catra and Adora - She Ra and the Princesses of Power

Catradora is canon! They kissed! What more is there to say. Arguably they should've been top but I never shipped them that much since I was always very much a multishipper when it came to she ra so yes I was very happy it became canon because we actually won for once but also I've never read much fanfic for them etc. But they are very much a dynamic I love and watching she ra all again in prep for season 5 I really enjoyed the build up of their relationship. The other two only go above because Buffy is my favourite show ever and damn there's some good fuffy fanfic and Aphra and Tolvan is both fresh in my mind and star wars owns me. Would love some catradora fic recs btw if anyone has them tho.

2) Buffy Summers and Faith Lehane - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

I didn't realise it was last year that I got super into them but according to my ao3 bookmarks it was lol. 2020 I swear it's lasted an eternity. I got into them about a month before lockdown (which feels like another lifetime). I've loved Buffy since I first watched it when I was 13. It's arguably still my favourite TV show. I've been through a lot of ships for Buffy - bangel to spuffy and now fuffy. I still think angel and her were a beautiful ship back in season 2 and especially in the angel episode I will remember you. But faith and Buffy had so much chemistry in season 3 - she would've been a fresh start for Buffy and the amount of fix it fics I read I swear. My favourite has to be one where they met in LA during Anne and how that changed everything feat Buffy's internal homophobia.

1) Cheili Lona Aphra and Magna Tolvan - Star Wars

I read Darth Vader (2015) and Doctor Aphra (2016) for the first time at the end of 2020 (got a comic subscription which has served me very well already I've nearly finished the star wars canon comics). Just to see canon queer ladies in star wars was so magical for me as a queer lady. I didn't think star wars would be so overt yet as to have a queer kiss in canon (even if it's in the comics) and especially not with the main character of arguably their main comic series. Now we just gotta hope that we'll get it in live action someday soon. They weren't the ship I consumed the most content of in 2020 but they were the highlight of my 2020 because star wars did that and I finally found out about it

Honourable mentions: Vivian and Elle - Legally Blonde, Candace and Vanessa - Phineas and Ferb, Stevie and Alex - Wizards of Waverly Place, Xander and Spike - Buffy the Vampire Slayer (I actually don't ship this but damn some authors are good - this was the ship that made me realise I don't need to like a ship if the author is good enough to write it well), Eli Vanto and Mitth'raw'nuruodo - Star Wars (started reading the books last year but finished this year and only started with fanfic this year), Villanelle and Eve - Killing Eve, Kanan and Hera - Star Wars, Barriss and Ahsoka - Star Wars, Remus and Sirius - Harry Potter, Kara and Lena - Supergirl (let's hope this becomes canon next year!) (Those last four are ones I've shipped forever some of my og ships but nothing particularly big has happened for me this year with them so)

I got Disney+ this year so rewatched a fair few things from my youth and though hey my obsession with that character may have been a little gay.