#I play the piano again
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#I don’t know what to do or say to makes things better so am just putting in the work#I go to therapy 4 times a week#20 hours of therapy per week#to fix myself#i’ve made a smaller list of small house chores and just small stuff i wanted to fix#i actually read a lot now… actual books#I play the piano again#I go for a stroll around the neighbourhood every other day#I clean bucky his shit every day to keep it clear and fresh#I play with him every night so my cat doesn’t get as depressed as i am#I clean my dishes everyday#the small stuff nobody will ever notice apart from me#and am proud of it#proud of the fact that even though people keep abusing me mentally and physically#I get broken down but I get back up and try to fix it#because i’ve always been positive…#i just tend to forget sometimes#i just wish things were different#i just wish it was easier#I just hope people are willing to forgive me#I also just need a fucking hug T_T
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absolutely obsessed with the implications of the different versions of the ballad now we have the full picture. it really is a masterclass in songwriting.
we start with nicky's version. the road is a metaphor for death, but it's about acceptance ("tame your fears, a door appears, the time has come to go"). it resolves musically, we end on the note we began on. it's in a major key, it sounds happy. it's a fun little tune.
agatha takes this and twists it in the version that plays over the montage of her killing covens. some of the chords are the same (A and D in the chorus) but they're minor versions now. it sounds dark and sad. agatha is grieving. when the other witches join in the harmonies are sinister, adding notes from the minor key. this becomes canonised in the sacred chant version: for 260 years agatha has been stuck grieving nicky.
enter lorna wu. her version is in a different key (p sure it's E flat major at the start). there are still some minor chords but the overall effect isn't the same, it's a major key. partly this is a trick of the instruments and the rock/pop vibe but we know there's a still a mother's grief about not being able to save her child (and herself?) in there, but she's more positive about this than agatha was: she accepts her own death, and she will protect alice if she can, but ultimately the road is still a metaphor about death and everyone walks it, but this time lorna changes the lyrics (the door doesn't appear to death in this version, it appears "to love that never dies" the people we love stay with us after death). and then the bridge. now a bridge musically takes us somewhere new, quite often it signals a key change, a turning point in the lyrics, something shifting. here I think the function is to show us that lorna is not accepting of agatha's static version of the ballad that has stayed the same (unable to move past her grief). the key modulates to a minor one (I think it's A minor), it's sad as lorna tells alice that though lorna will die, she'll always be with her: "if I can't reach you... if I can't hold you, remember what I told you". I think it's significant the last chorus is "we" go down, down, down the road. everyone walks the road to death. it's part of life. agatha can't accept this, but lorna does. she'll see alice at the end.
#kind of sad Alice didn't get to see lorna again when rio took her but never mind#agatha all along#shout out to my wife who had to listen to me play various different versions of this on the piano before work this morning#as I was turning it all over in my mind
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yeag,
#i was trying to practice piano and a moth came up and just started YELLING#babe what do you want??#i would get up and then they would point at the piano till I sat back down and played again#It was like w my cats they just wanted to be included i guess#sky cotl#thatskygame#sky children of the light
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Belphie blinks at you in greeting as you slide under the covers with him, only humming gently when you hold onto him for dear life. Dark indigo eyes noticing with interest that you haven't even started getting ready for RAD yet---not that he was one to talk---the Avatar of Sloth merely gives you a lazy smirk and wraps his tail around you under the covers as you whisper a strangled out, 'hide me'.
He nods slowly, his throat feeling much too heavy, and he himself feeling much too lazy to use his words. A pale hand pulls the covers over your head, just in time too, as Lucifer bursts into the room, ruby red eyes shining like a wolf on the hunt.
"Have you seen MC?" The eldest asks, paying no mind to the usual sound of morning chaos coming from the rest of the house.
Belphie lets out a strangled, lazy, "Nope." all the while his tail tightens around you.
Lucifer shakes his head. Looking at the you shaped lump under the covers. Merely pinching the bridge of his hooked nose and sighing, "MC. If you wanted a break from RAD, you could've just asked instead of opting to hide."
You pop out from under the covers, eyes wide like a deer in headlights, Belphegor's arms wrap around you from under the covers, his eyes sleepily tracing the features of your face as you speak.
"Right.....yeah. Sorry Luci?" You tilt your head, the Avatar of Pride's eyes soften a fraction.
"Be sure to catch up on your schoolwork, we only have room for one academic failure in this house and I'm afraid that spot has permanently been reserved for Mammon." Lucifer says sternly, though you can see the faintest upward quirk of his lips.
"Aye aye Captain." You nod, sleepily saluting the eldest.
"Belphegor."
Belphie turns to look at his eldest brother.
"Just because MC has a day off school, it doesn't mean you have one. Your uniform's hanging up by your desk." The ebony-haired demon walks out of the room.
"...Diavolo fucking dammit."
#rant incoming😋😋😋😋#i had my first proper day back at school today im going to jump off of a building tyvm.#gng im not stepping foot in there again my uniform sucks and im eepy and its only been one day#but i got half of my results back and they spell out BAABAA like a sheep which is fun 😋#so this year im gonna have to GRIND to work those As up to A*s/maintain those As; and then work the B's up to As (+ if its a high B; an A*)#+ i cant do any languages for A levels if i dont do higher tier in all aspects of it; which I NO NO WANNA ITS GONNA BE HARD :(#+ im starting violin this saturday (i can hardly play piano gng idk what im doing)#gng idk im struggling but not struggling? like happy for the oppurtunities but by Jesus Christ im going to do a whip nae nae#obey me imagines#obey me shall we date#obey me x reader#obey me headcanons#obey me mc#omswd#obey me lucifer#obey me belphegor#obey me belphie
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ARE Y'ALL READY FOR THIS THING I MADE THAT I WANNA MAKE YOU WATCH
*drum roll* My first traditionally 2d animated short is done (well. Done enough. Not perfect but it's just an informal practice thing so you know what it's fine for that) BEHOLD
Sound on for questionable quality keyboard noises
So yeah this is a little experiment I churned out in a month of neglecting other more important projects....it's supposed to be like.....the feeling of slumping into burnout and then the ups and downs of trying to get out of it? does it make sense...?
But yeah basically it's traditional animation - like ink and paint on cels and composited and scanned manually. More rambling under the cut. :)
I kinda made this bc it annoys me the mainstream has decided this is an obsolete art form and I'm protesty about it because IT'S ART IT DOESNT BECOME OBSOLETE JUST BC SOFTWARE EXISTS DO NOT PASS GO DO NOT COLLECT 200 DOLLARS.
I did cheat a little and digitally cut the water and copy-pasted it onto some frames but that's because I could find ONE TRANSPARENT BLUE SHEET IN THE ENTIRE METROPOLITAN AREA I KID YOU NOT. and I didn't want to cut my only precious water sheet in case something went wrong or I had to redo a shot. But everything else is pretty manual.
Also the music is op 76 no 2 by Sibelius - ATTEMPTED 🙃. Sorry some notes are just SO QUIET but it's good enough it's whatever. My level of piano skill is like. Not professional by any stretch of the imagination and this is about as good as I can do rn.
Oh and backgrounds are generally various kinds of charcoal with ink
anyway hope you at least found my project interesting thanks for watching
(actually not to make it weird but my whole life has led up to me trying this and I blame Joe Murray for making me want to be an animator when I was a little kid and I always wanted to try this kind and now I finally had the time and money and enough drawing skills to try it so yeah it's not like friggin Disney or whatever but I am happy I got to make it exist. feels like I checked a thing off my bucket list)
#Traditional animation#Cel animation#Burn out#Artists on tumblr#Piano music#Overly ambitious nonsense#'Hey ej why didn't you just have water on its own cels '#BECAUSE THIS SHIT IS MORE EXPENSIVE THAN MY ENGINEERING DEGREE AND I WILL BE UNABLE TO AFFORD MY MORTGAGE#Also as for the music it's Good Enough bc I had a few good runs and cobbled together the best bits and#I GUARANTEE YOU I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO PLAY IT WELL AGAIN THATS JUST HOW THIS GOES
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dazai has the most random set of skills that he chooses to selectively mention at the worst times possible. on a stealth mission with kunikida? he disappears for a bit and next thing poor kunikida knows dazai is playing piano up on stage. he can also wrap injuries at terrifying speeds, which is obvious enough, but he sometimes does it so fast atsushi won’t even notice and ends up scared. he’s of pretty average speed but when he’s messing with someone, he can just about teleport.
#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#bsd dazai#i am 10000% a dazai plays piano truther because i do#(and chuuya plays guitar. again because i do)
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Actually so tired that people mainly focus on the bdsm when they talk about La Pianiste when we literally have this dynamic right here. Like, that's insane.
What if you were a little girl in her 40's who couldn't grow up because of your mother-wife who made you sleep in her bed and forced you to repress every sexual desires and thoughts of becoming your own person just to keep you close to her ? What if you fought back and yearned for dangerous things out of her reach ? But also, what if you let her because it's all you've ever known and been taught to want ?
#these two are so entangled with each other and in the roles they play#(mother and daughter. husband and wife. prodigal or ungrateful daughter. adoring or mocking mother)#that they cannot handle it when something else is thrown into the mix#There's no space left because they fill all the roles in each other's lives.#but at the same time they never give the other exactly what she wants#The fights never last. Erika will never live up to her mother's ambitions. And her mother will never give her any form of affection which#might satiate her hunger for love. And so on.#They are deeply imperfect- Love and Despise each other but they could never bear the thought of being separated#When I read the part in the book where Erika talks to Walter for the first time and all she wants is to go back into her mother's womb...#you can't make that shi up#when people talk about toxic yuri that's what they could mean but unfortunately we live in a society#gradually learning to accept the person I'm becoming who would've been burned at the stake by my younger self <3#been having so much thoughts about this film once again. And I know that nothing written here is new but I'm a little sad no one really#talks about this relationship online since it's really the heart of the story for me#Of course everything happening with Walter is important. But none of that would be there without the mother-daughter situation#la pianiste#the piano teacher#haneke#sheep stuffs#isabelle huppert#also I'd kinda get it if it was another film and it made people too uncomfortable to talk about it. but I mean this is literally La Pianist
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SUPERSTAR SAGA YOU CAN'T JUST PUT ME THROUGH ALL THAT AND THEN GIVE ME A TIME LIMIT TO GET OUT OF THE SHIP BEFORE IT EXPLODES WITHOUT GIVING ME A SAVE STATE FIRST THAT WAS SO SCARY PLEASE DON'T DO THAT
#my inept panicking ''can't navigate their way out of a cardboard box'' ass was so sure I was going to die#and have to fight Cackletta all over again#I'm so glad that the time limit was actually very reasonable because that would've been so upsetting#''Piano you were playing on the switch you could've just used a save state'' I REALIZE THAT NOW BUT IN THE MOMENT I PANICKED#piano plays superstar saga
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and then you hear that stupid piano's fucking tremolo or something
#persona 4#p4#gsa sl au#moel gas station attendant#⛽️🌫#tohru adachi#arttag#boot.tingting#// the caption is about a sky full of stars aka the theme you hear when you go outside#// telling nanachan sweetie i need to beef up my social links and i walk out that door and the piano goes brrrrowwww wooooowwwww#// yknow there isnt any music when it rains in game actualy but i like to think a muffled or gentler remix of the track plays when its rain#// and then the music is gone again when soujifucks up the attendant sl or something . who knows#// whatever i dont want to make a dissertation on video game souintrack right now. here;s friendship forever and ever and ever and ever and
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oh! he's a hopeless romantic i don't know what to tell you!
he is so! bah! he will play you love songs on the piano regardless if you know of them, and sing such! oh! i cant with him!
he daydreams, he writes poems, oh he draws little hearts over his "i"s instead of dots...
#welcome home#welcome home oc#rainy dewdrop#myart#frank frankly#eddie dear#frankly dear#frank x eddie#eddie x frank#oh rainy! you're hopeless!!!#yes... he plays the piano!#he's a all-in-one muscian!#welcome home masquerade au#oh!!! i found out about the song Let You Break My Heart Again...#the song is him!!! very much him!!!#i could almost cry... bah!!!#oh i should probably say rainy isn't crushing on anyone! (canonically!)#it's like#have you ever wished you could be in love as well? that sort of thing!
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an underrated thing in j&w fanfiction is when bertie innocently says something that could be taken for him expressing romantic feelings for jeeves (or he actually IS expressing romantic feelings) and jeeves.exe stops working for a second. might be my favorite thing actually
#this is always followed by jeeves saying ‘sir?’ and me cheering#it also works with unexpected touching or physical proximity#i’ve also seen it several times with bertie playing something romantic on the piano#it’s versatile#i’m a simple person all i want is to read jeeves having a total systems failure because he’s down bad for his employer#again and again and again#//#jeeves and wooster#jooster
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I like to think that when the batfamily inevitably runs out of money and jobless Bruce, Tim, and Dick* find themselves in financial need, Steph reveals that she's made thousands of dollars taking odd jobs around Gotham City that we just never saw bc Steph hasn't been in a comic for months. Nobody checked in on her and while they weren't looking she made 6 grand babysitting and playing piano at a local theatre. Bruce has to grovel for enough money to buff out a scratch on the batmobile and Steph is revelling in it. This is the closest she's ever going to get to being a supervillain
*(Cass and Jason don't need money to survive on account of being homeless as kids + Babs funds Cass' basic needs and Damian is on his mom's payroll, same w/ duke even if it's obvs not al ghul money)
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#dc#stephanie brown#bruce wayne#tim drake#dick grayson#batfamily#...#wayne family adventures#that seems like something that could happen over there lmao#i already said babysitting and playing piano at a local theatre (NEVER FORGET STEPH CANONICALLY TOOK UP PIANO AGAIN. BATGIRLS 18)#but i can also picture her doing other odd jobs#harper teaches her some basic electrical engineering tips and Steph takes a couple jobs with her for some extra cash#in batgirl 2009 she was working off her tuition by working at her school library so maybe she can do something like that too as well#i like to imagine that off screen steph will work a job for a week then get paid then get fired bc she lets her vigilante life take over#meanwhile Tim's been a dilettant on his houseboat and dick has the leftovers of what alfred gave to him which he gave to charity(?)#and bruce has just been funnelling his last remaining dollars into batman until one day his bat bank account hits negative $50#bruce has been begrudgingly letting Talia pay his rent and groceries for the past few months (damian had to cooerce him into it)#anyway i wish they did more w broke Batman. not that bruce cant survive w/o money but hes usually like. in the wilderness in those scenarios#not a city that i just KNOW has an incredibly fucked up economic situation. i bet it costs $1.95 for bottled water in gotham#anyway. bad headcanons <3
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Emma 2020 is like what if. You were trapped in a house in a dark with a father only you can manage. What if you were constantly told about a woman with accomplishments you frankly can't achieve because in so many things valued for young women you're just mediocre, you have no special talents other than being charming and likeable and you can't even do that all the time. What if you just wanted to do something that meant something but you didn't even realize that's what you wanted.
#emma 2020#truly a fascinating adaptation#AND I FORGOT ABOUT HOW SHE CLEARLY HAS NO SKILLS#like it's SO important how I read the movie. she can play the piano but only like. fine.#she can paint but it's like. it's not great.#she's a very average girl.#again hence why Jane irks her! Jane is skilled and seems to be able to mean something in the world#to be useful! I love how the movie made this the thing that foils them specifically
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the video of taylor and gracie songwriting is amazing. it reminds me of the famous getaway car clip….its just so cool to see how her songwriting brain works in real time
#taylor swift#mine#we got to see this a little in miss americana as well with ME! but these moments feel more organic#idk why but when she plays me on the piano it feels more polished and completed even though it wasn’t finished#great time to bring up my love of ME! piano version again though#i think there’s also footage of her writing only the young in the initial stages too#it’s just very very cool to see#i would give anything to be a fly on the wall in a room where taylor is writing a song
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do we want to hear a theo voice reveal/original spoken word w music accompaniment… vote now on your devices
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rrarauhh these have been in my sketchbook for Literally Months; iwas gonna clean em up but if i donot post them as is they willnot be posted so ^_^ woe. funy realization designs be upon ye.
ecstasy, mimicry, and moonlight angies respectively; ft. roland cameo on the right. because Two Of Them :]
#these r in that weird limbo of Almost But Not Quite where i Do like them but they need just a lil push for me t say theyre Done yknow.#anyway.#pikart#projmoon#ft me trying t edit w my offkilter monitor ''>w>#dreamingcurrent is dreamingcurrent but alsoooo.#mimicry angie bc its on my mind a lot. not just bc i like mimicry but also not Not because of that#iwanted t play more w the blurring of lines btwn human and machine; wires and nerves and oil and blood and flesh and silicone. etc.#the inherent body horror of slowly shifting from one extreme to the other; metamorphosis; a stilted newness almost.#but also playing on other people's perception of Wrongness tying in with angelas desire to Be. etc etc etc... you understand.#and then moonlight.. ijust kinda felt in my soul ok.#ft. angie as the performer and roland as the piano. bc i thought it was funny. ^_^#also bc roland deserves t kill it in a gown again. w a side of mourners veil... would fit right in w cheseds floor were it not themed.#something abt jaded acceptance and grief.#angela gets to be a creature again also. because she deserves it.#RRAUGH id go off more but im already um .well. lol. anyway i knew at some point ifeel it in my Soul but not in my Words. yay ^_^
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