#I need other people to see my vision here
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
preiyers · 18 hours ago
Text
♱ HUSBAND!LUIGI MANGIONE HEADCANONS
WARNINGS: a tiny bit of smut!
A/N: highkey self indulgent cus i Need that mad so effing bad
♱ the two of you met through a mutual friend who was telling you about how her guy best friend hasn't been a relationship since he was in college
"THAT guy has been walking around single for years? how is that possible?"
and she just responds with him being occupied with his hobbies and work.
♱ was extremely nervous when asking for your parents permission to propose (if you have siblings, he def asked them too!)
♱ he proposed to you on your 4th valentine's day together while the two of you were at a park, painting portraits of each other
"okay hun, you ready? here's mine," you handed him the painting and he put it by his face with the biggest smile on his face. "alright your turn!"
he takes a breath and then hands you the painting, "okay look," you open your eyes as he places it in your hands and tears instantly well in them as you read it. through your peripheral vision you see him going down on one knee at the side of the table, with the ring box in his hand.
"y–yes, yes i do!" you watch him put the ring on your ring finger.
♱ the both of you decided you would prefer traveling the world instead of spending thousands to feed a hundred people
♱ the two of you had a small wedding with immediate family invited at the park close to your shared apartment and both your parents brought potluck food
♱ would always insist in carrying your bags whenever you went even when it was just a tiny purse
♱ needs to have his hands on you at all times. may it be holding your hand, a hand on the low of your back, an arm around your shoulder and the likes
♱ on your first night in paris, you two had fine dining and he couldn't resist himself the moment you guys got to the hotel. you were so sure he got you pregnant that night
"you're just so beautiful," he said in between thrusts, holding your body closer to his, now you were chest to chest. "i can't believe you're my wife."
♱ hates spending money on unnecessary things (underconsumption king) but would likely buy you something expensive once in a while like a necklace, a charm bracelet with your favorite things, the dress you’ve been eyeing for a while. just know that man buy anything to make his wife happy!
♱ buys you a bouquet of flowers every sunday or every time he ran some errands
♱ when you go on a night out with some friends, he takes you home and helps you get out of your clothes to do your night routine
♱ when it’s that time of the month or during the early stages of your pregnancy, he’s always there to take care of you and buy whatever you were craving that day
♱ plans your dates and even surprises you that he still wanted to celebrate your month anniversaries
“babe, that’s the date we started dating, not even our wedding anniversary date!” you chuckled at him and he still answers back with the usual, “i don’t care, i still want to celebrate how long we’ve been together,”
♱ used to be afraid of letting you know when he experiences his chronic pain as to not seem weak to you when the two of you were still dating but now that you’re married, there’s like a routine for you now when it happens. either getting him into the shower with warm water or massaging his back with cooling oils
♱ his exterior is all big, tough guy who loves being active but behind closed doors, he just loves being a gentle and cuddley guy to his wife
TAGLIST !
@fuckitiloveyouu @meikoismartha @strawbxrryaxolotyl @ilovetoomanymen @onlyangelicc
comment if u wanna be added <3
105 notes · View notes
aemondapologistfrfr · 1 day ago
Text
I See You As You Are
Tumblr media
aemond x f!reader 
Series Masterlist
Summary: You are placed in marriage with a man you’ve never met. You write to him in hopes of getting to learn something about him but your letters go mostly unanswered. After arriving at court you and the Prince have already made decisions about each other that weighs down heavily on the both of you.
Warnings: miscommunication, arranged marriage, a cup of wine, both aemond and reader wanting to speak but refusing to do so
Authors Note: pls see the vision w me ik this is different from my smut smut smut smut but like give her a shot maybe 👉🏼👈🏼
Word Count: 5k
                                         ᓚᘏᗢ
ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত
Aemond couldn’t care less about strengthening house alliances if it meant he had to marry someone he’s never met. He didn’t necessarily see himself marrying, nonetheless being forced into one for political headaches that his mother and grandfather had caused. He even went as far to speak to Aegon to tell him he would do no such thing. After Aegon’s fit of laughter he just clapped Aemond on the back and congratulated him on the opportunity to bed a woman more than once. 
Aemond fumed and stormed out of his chambers and started to make his way down to the training yard. He walked down the stairs and threw the doors open making a straight line, avoiding the people who glanced his way. He stops on his heel when he hears the grand maester calling after him. 
“My Prince, just a moment.” the man shuffles down the stairs with a small scroll. “From your betrothed.” the maester smiles up at him before leaving him in the yard once more. 
Aemond looks down at the rolled parchment in his hands as if it’s personally begrudged him. What could you possibly need to say to him? He’s half tempted to throw it in the fire but his curiosity is getting the better of him. Sighing he steps over to the wall and breaks the seal and unrolls the parchment. 
~
My Prince, 
I must admit my nerves about coming to King’s Landing at the end of the week. I’ve never been to court and I don’t know what to expect. If you had any words of advice or encouragement I would be grateful. I look forward to meeting you. No one seems to know much about you and I’ve grown quite curious. 
Your Betrothed 
~
Aemond reads over your parchment two more times and scoffs before shoving it in his pocket. What do you expect him to say? Any words of encouragement.. he shakes his head. He has nothing to say and no desire to write back to you but he’s sure the maester has told his mother by now and she’ll insist. He clenches his fist before beginning to make his way to the training yard. 
“Aemond.” he closes his eye when he hears his mothers voice. He just wants to train. “Come, what did she say?” she swishes over to him. 
“None of your concern.” he looks down at her. 
“You will write back to her.” her voice firm. 
“What is the point? She’ll be here by the end of the week.” his tone clipped. 
“What did she say?” she tries to pry. 
“That she doesn’t want to come to court.” he turns to walk back to the training yard but his mother grabs his arm. 
“Let me see.” she holds out her hand. 
“No.” he spits out. 
“Aemond. Show me.” she steps closer and he flares his nostrils, shoving the parchment into her hand. She scans it over and shakes her head at him. “You will tell her you’re excited to meet her and ask if there’s anything she should want to be more comfortable.” his eye widens at her suggestion. 
“I will do no such thing.” he scoffs at her. “I’m going to train.” he snatches the parchment out of her fingers before making his way to the training yard once more. 
ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত
You curse yourself as you wait all morning for a raven to come. It was wishful to think the Prince would write back to you, but you couldn’t help but hope. By the time it was midday you had given up and started down the steps of the tower. You stopped and decided you were going to send him another letter. With no care or not if he answered this one, you sat at the desk and picked up the quill and ink. 
~
Prince Aemond, 
Most of my trunks are packed now. I scarcely recognize my own chambers any longer. We’re to start our journey to King's Landing the day after tomorrow. My nerves have been getting the best of me. I hope to hear from you before we leave. 
Your Betrothed
~
You fan the ink off, helping it dry before you begin to roll it. You pour a small amount of wax on and press the seal onto the paper. You hand it off to a maester and make your way back down the steps. When you make it out in the courtyard you look around with glassy eyes already missing your home and you haven’t even left yet. You quickly dry your eyes and make your way back to your chambers. 
ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত
Gods above you sent him another letter. He snatches the rolled parchment and storms back to his chambers and sits at his table with his head in his hands. He had hoped this situation would just go away and maybe if he ignored you, you wouldn’t come to court. He stares at the parchment before opening it and reading. He read it twice more and memorized how his name looked in your handwriting. 
Aemond groans, rubbing his face and letting the parchment fall to the table. He leans back in the chair before picking up the parchment and reading your curt words over again. He rises and grabs a piece of parchment along with his ink and quill before sitting back down. He stares at the blank parchment at a loss for what to say. 
~
Court lacks anything of importance at the moment. My mother has urged me to offer you anything that will make you more comfortable. Make your requests and they will be done. 
Aemond Targaryen
~
He reads over his message and nods. As the ink dries he begins to melt the wax to seal it, shaking his head at sending you a raven. He quickly rolls the parchment and seals it, blowing on the wax. Walking to his door quickly he takes the parchment to the maester before he changes his mind and throws the message into the fire. The maester smiles at the small roll and Aemond waits until he sees the raven begin to carry it into the sky. 
He scrunches his brow wishing he didn’t send it in the first place. He debates whether it’d be worth it to get on Vhagar and have her burn every raven an hour out of the city. Annoyance washes through him that you even wrote to him in the first place and forced this decision upon him. Letters matter little when you’ll be here in days, it’s simply a waste of time. 
ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত
It seems as if the Prince is a man of few words. You’ve gathered he has no desire to speak with you and a pit settles at the bottom of your stomach. Nerves wash through you thinking about marrying this man. You know you have no choice in the matter so you pull out a piece of parchment and begin to write out your requests. 
You look over the parchment nodding to yourself before sealing it and sending it off with a raven. As you walk down the stairs you slow, thinking how this will be your last time doing so. Your last afternoon in the gardens of your childhood. Your last night in your bed in your home. 
ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত
This morning Aemond makes his way directly to the maester to receive the parchment he knows he received. The maester opens the door with a smile and places the roll in his hand. He turns on his heel and returns to his chamber to read over your requests privately. 
~
Aemond Targaryen, 
I see. All that I request is access to the library and garden. 
~
He has read over your fifteen words exactly that many times. His brow furrows and he has a strange feeling in his chest at your short reply. He clenches his jaw and tosses the parchment on top of the other two and pours himself a small cup of wine. Of course you would have access to those things. Do you think you’re his prisoner? Maybe being betrothed to him was like being a prisoner. He knows when you finally see him you’ll think that. 
He shakes his head and finishes the wine before walking back over to your three letters. His eye scans over them, all the while his anger begins to slowly rise. Snatching up the parchments he walks over to the hearth prepared to burn them until he hesitates. He groans and opens the drawer on his side table and shoves them in before slamming it shut. He storms out of his chambers to go lose himself to his training once more. 
ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত
Aemond flares his nostrils as his mother fusses over his doublet. He bats her hands away and she gives him a warning look. He hears the doors start to groan open and his mother turns and stands with a straight back next to him. Aemond scans over every person who steps foot through the doors wondering if he’ll be able to know who you are. 
You tell yourself you’re going to keep your eyes on the ground so you don’t lose your nerve. Not that you had any nerve to begin with. You were terrified to meet Aemond and had no desire to meet him for the first time in a room full of people. Despite everything when you step into the hall your eyes snap up and you know exactly who he is. 
You look directly at him and he’s already staring at you. You watch as his eye scans you over before he raises his chin and looks away. You feel your cheeks flush as you continue to walk deeper into the hall. He watches from the corner of his eye as your skirts trail behind you as you come to stand across from him. He can feel you staring at him and he slowly turns his attention back to you. 
You look up at him and shrink under his gaze as his head slowly turns back to you. Gods, he’s so intimidating. There’s a small frown on his face as he turns his gaze away from you once more. You smooth your skirts and try to focus on the words being spoken but all you can hear is your heart pounding in your ears. 
His mind is filled with the picture of how nervous you look. Your cheeks are flushed and you can barely look at him. Your hands are clasped in front of you as you keep your head down. He continues to steal glances at you until his mother elbows him and he glares down at her. 
“What?” he hisses before noting how the hall is quiet. 
“Ask to take her to the gardens.” she says through her teeth. Gods right now? He looks at you and sees you chewing on your lower lip and sighs. He clears his throat and steps forward. 
“Would you like to walk through the gardens?” your eyes snap up to him at his soft voice. You nod once and he offers you his arm. He watches you stare at his outstretched arm and clenches his jaw as the second tick by. “May I escort you?” he tries to subtly prompt. 
“Oh, yes, of course.” you mutter lightly grabbing onto his arm. 
He leads you out to the garden and you both walk in a heavy silence. You have no idea what to say and you can see him clenching his jaw tightly. He catches every small change of expression on your face. Your eyes widen as you walk into the gardens taking in their grandeur. Your mouth opens and he thinks you’re going to finally speak but then you snap it shut the next second. 
Aemond doesn’t know what to say so he continues to silently lead you down the stone path. You take mental notes of flowers and small alcoves you plan on visiting on your own and keep pace with him hoping for this walk to end. You wish to see your chambers and settle after your travels. You can tell Aemond would rather be anywhere else than with you at the moment you try to hurry your pace. 
Aemond furrows his brow at your sudden hurried steps. Why were you walking faster than before? Had you hated your walk that much? Sure it was quiet but you had requested the gardens in your letter. Maybe you hadn’t wanted to be here with him. He knew you didn’t want to be here with him. He lets go of your arm and he watches your steps falter before you continue at his side with your hands held together. 
Your face heats so thoroughly and you feel tears well in your eyes when he releases your arm. Embarrassment washes through you for holding onto his arm as long as you did. Surely you should’ve let go long before that. Maybe that’s why he was so quiet. You shake your head and wipe at your eyes as subtly as you can, willing the tears to just disappear. 
Aemond hears your sniffle before you even wipe at your eyes. His mind races trying to figure out what’s wrong and why you're crying. You must loathe the idea of having to marry him. He doesn’t know what to do so he keeps walking and looking ahead. You shake your head softly and square your shoulders as if nothing happened and continue the silent walk. 
By the time the both of you walk back into the Keep you have your composure once more. A flock of handmaidens come to your side once at the main steps and whisk you away from Aemond much to your relief. You wonder if you should’ve said goodbye but he made no attempt to say anything so neither did you. 
                                         ᓚᘏᗢ
Aemond slams his sword down onto his opponent's blade feeling the man’s hold begin to waver. You left him in the hall without saying anything or even looking back at him. He couldn't blame you. He’s sure you're disappointed in him. You surely expected a Prince who is beautiful and gallant and you received him. He pulls his sword back to jab it at the man and he falls to the ground. Aemond looks down at him unimpressed before leaving the man in the dirt and stalking out of the yard. 
As he walks back into the Keep he spots you walking down the stairs at his mothers side. Your eyes catch on him before you quickly look away with red cheeks. He glances at his mother who is smiling at him and he groans knowing this will be no good. 
“Aemond.” she hums softly. “I was just talking about you.” his eye narrows at her and she smiles. “I was telling her how much you love the library and if anyone could show her around them it would be you.” she gives him a pointed look. 
“Or one of the maesters who work within the walls.” he mutters. 
“Nonsense.” she shakes her head. “You’re there daily.” he exhales loudly at her words and slides his eye to you. 
“When do you want to see the library?” he watches your eyes look up at him and when he thinks you’re about to speak his mother does. 
“Now.” she nods. “Then I’ll have lunch prepared for the both of you.” she smiles offering you a gentle squeeze on your arm before she leaves you with Aemond. 
“Do you truly wish to see the library?” he looks down at you. 
“If it’s not too much trouble.” your voice small. 
“This way then.” he starts down the hall not checking if you’re following or not. 
You stare after him walking down the hall before you start to follow after him. Your steps are quick until you’re at his side and he’s looking down at you. You don’t acknowledge his stare and instead take in your surroundings excited for when you’re settled and have more time to explore. As you round the next corner your face smashes into a chest. 
“Is this your betrothed, brother?” Aemond clenches his jaw as Aegon's hands hold on to your arms to steady you. “You’re quite beautiful.” you blush at his words. 
“Thank you, my King.” you whisper and he chuckles. 
“You can call me Aegon.” he brushes his fingers against your cheek. 
“Well if you’ll excuse us, Aegon.” Aemond grits out through his teeth. 
“Oh yes, the library cannot wait.” Aegon chuckles and continues on down the hall. “Lovely to meet you.” he tosses over his shoulder. 
Aemond is rigid beside you and you watch him inhale deeply, closing his eye. You go to place your hand on his arm in comfort but then remember the garden walk and bring your hand back to your side. When he opens his eye he sees you looking up at him before quickly averting your gaze. You bring your eyes down to your nails, finding them suddenly interesting. 
“This way to the library.” his words clipped as he starts down the hallway leaving you yet again to trail after him. 
You catch up to his side once more and stop with him in front of a set of massive doors. You crane your head up to the ceilings taking in the detail of the wood. Aemond watches you look at the doors in wonder and when a maester pushes the door open he hears the soft gasp from you. You peer inside before the door clicks shut again and take a tentative step towards the doorway. 
“Can we go in?” you turn and look up at him. 
“Is that not why I brought you here?” he watches your smile falter at his words and he sighs pushing the doors open for you. You step in and your eyes dance across all of the shelves. “I’ll tell a maester you're here and to help if you need.” he nods his head and leaves you. 
You watch as he walks over to a man in a cream robe curled over a desk. They exchange hushed words and the man glances your way before looking back up at Aemond. He shakes his head and stalks out of the library and the doors click shut behind him. Were you supposed to follow him? You thought he was going to show you around, that’s the impression his mother had given you. You shake the thoughts out of your head and begin at the first shelf. You go to grab a book from the shelf and the man in the cream robe is on his feet instantly. 
“This is the maesters section.” he lightly takes the book from your hands and places it back on the shelf. “Might I point you in the direction of something more comely for a lady such as yourself.”
“Oh,” you look at the ground, feeling your cheeks heat. “I’m sorry. I-“ you shake your head, wanting to flee. 
“No need to apologize.” his words are soft. “Come. Upstairs is where we house our more interesting stories.” he smiles and you feel your shoulders begin to relax. 
“Thank you. I would appreciate that greatly.” you nod once and begin to follow him. 
“Is there a particular story you were in search of?” he leads you over to the stone steps. 
You tell him of the story you were reading before you left home. You couldn’t quite remember the name but you gave him basic details and he leads you into a smaller section by the windows. You take in the plush couches and chairs and within seconds a couple servants are coming out and lighting candles for you and offering to bring you tea. 
“These shelves contain stories of such nature.” he smiles, pulling a book down. “I believe this to be the paired book to the one you were explaining.” he places it delicately in your hands. 
“They’ve made a second?” you smile opening the cover. “Could I borrow this from the library?” your eyes dart around all the shelves. 
“But of course.” he nods. “I’ll leave you to read. Your tea should be to you momentarily. Is there anything else I could assist you with?” you chew your lip wondering whether to inquire about Aemond or not. 
“Did he say he was coming back?” you want him to come back and stay away all the same. 
“He did not say.” he averts his eyes.
“Then that is all.” you nod letting your smile reappear. “Thank you again, maester.” he nods to you and makes his way back down the stairs. 
You take your book and curl up in the chair near the window. The sheer size of the library could have you lost and you’ve never been more thankful for an escape. A servant rushes over with a cup of tea before leaving you once more. You open your book and allow yourself to relax back against the chair as you start on the prologue. For the next couple of hours you immerse yourself into the fairytale that offers you promises and thoughts of sweet Princes who will kiss your hand and talk with you for hours in the garden. 
ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত
The past two days Aemond shared maybe a total of twenty words with you and that is generous. He mostly just hums and nods his head before disappearing until you both have to share a meal. Tonight his mother has prepared a dinner for the both of you in the gardens in hopes that you will start to warm up to one another. 
Aemond looks down at his mother as she picks out a new jerkin for him to wear tonight. He flares his nostrils at every suggestion and his patience is wearing thin, if he had any to begin with. When she tells him to leave his dagger behind he shakes his head once and escorts her out of his chambers. 
“You are to receive her from her chambers within-
“Yes. I’m aware.” he sighs and clicks his door shut quickly. 
Aemond kicks all of the servants and handmaidens out of his chambers with a few clipped words. He walks over to his window and stares across the bay, slowly shutting his eye. He tries to calm his mind before your shared meal. It’s not the first and he’s accepted it is nowhere near your last. He digs his fingers into the stone ledge before turning and stalking over to his door. 
The halls are dim and full of low chatter that he ignores as he starts down the next hall. With every step he can just picture the horror on your face at having to sit across from him. He grips the hilt of his dagger, the coarse leather offering him a semblance of comfort. He slows his steps as he stops in front of your doors and brings his fist up to knock. You open the door quickly and tilt your head to look up at him. 
“Good evening, my Prince.” you try to offer him a smile but lose your nerve and look down. 
“Are you ready for supper?” he watches you look back into your chambers. 
“Do you know if it’s cold? Should I bring a shawl?” you nibble your lip bringing his attention to your mouth. 
“Do you not have windows of your own?” he watches you shrink in on yourself and begins to feel his chest tighten. Is this guilt? For what? “I’ll wait here while you get your shawl.” his soft words equally surprise you both. 
You nod your head once and shuffle over to your wardrobe pulling out the piece of fabric. He rolls his eye at the fact you think that would ever keep the cold away but when he watches you wrap it around your shoulders he stiffens. He pushes the thought out of his head as you walk back over to him. 
“Are you ready?” he offers you his arm and you feel your heart stop. 
He watches you stare at his arm and he clenches his jaw giving you three more- your hand grabs onto his forearm. He shuts your chamber door and begins to escort you down the hall. As you walk down the steps you feel everyone’s eyes on the two of you and you scoot a fraction of an inch closer to him. You know people won’t approach him so maybe if you cling to him you’ll both be left alone. 
He feels his chest swell when you dig your fingers into his arm and practically curl into his side. He looks down at you and sees you staring at the floor. He lifts his head back up and the people staring at the both of you quickly avert their attention. He leads you out of the main doors and starts towards the gardens. Your grip loosens once there’s a lack of people and he understands. 
“I’m sorry.” you mumble letting go of his arm and he frowns. “I know I shouldn’t hold on to you for so long. I just.. I don’t know. Forgive me, my Prince.” you shake your head and he stops and you take a couple more steps before turning to him. 
“Why shouldn’t you hold on to my arm?” he studies your face as it flushes. 
“Because you don’t like it. The first day in the gardens you let go and.. It was foolish of me. I’m sorry if I’ve ruined the evening.” your face starts to get hot and you feel your eyes welling with tears. When you look up at him with glassy eyes he feels something strange in his chest. “If you want me to go back to my chambers I’ll understand.” you quickly wipe at your eyes. 
He mulls over your words trying to make sense of them. You’re crying because you want to hold onto his arm and are nervous that he’ll send you away for wanting to do so. He shakes his head softly, deciding to think more on that later but right now he just wants you to stop crying and looking at him as if he scolded you. 
“Would you like to dine in the gardens?” he watches you nod your head once and he lets out a small puff of breath. “And would you like to hold onto my arm?” he watches you look to his arm and up to him and give him a small nod. “Then may I escort you to our table?” he holds his arm out for you and you look up at him in question. 
You reach out for his arm half expecting him to chuckle and turn on his heel and leave but instead he steps closer. He starts to lead you through the gardens once more and for the first time the silence isn’t so stifling. There is still tension but nowhere near as much the first time in the gardens. He leads you to the small gazebo lit with hundreds of candles and at the table he pulls your chair out for you. You mumble out a thanks and he nods once before taking his seat across from you. 
Servants surround the tables once you’re both settled and begin filling glasses and bringing out food. Aemond watches as you thank each servant softly before they leave the two of you. You feel his gaze yet make no move to meet it as you pick up your wine. Your eyes quickly flick to him and he averts his gaze first. He picks up his cup in place of starting the conversation he so badly wants to have secretly hoping you’ll talk first. 
As the minutes tick by the silence becomes heavier as the meal goes on. You steal glances at each other but neither of you are willing to speak. Your mind is still back at the garden's entrance when he offered you his arm once more. Something seems to have slightly shifted but you’re too scared to speak on it, nervous that it will go back to how it was before. 
Aemond watches your brow furrow and unfurrow throughout the course of the meal and he wishes you would just tell him what you’re thinking. He doesn’t want to ask, nervous that you’ll start crying once more. It wasn’t his intention to upset you, he just assumed you were upset because of him. Well you were upset with him but for completely different reasons than he had thought. 
After the meal he walks to your side of the table and offers you his arm. You look up at him and offer him a smile while placing your hand around his forearm. He walks you back to your chambers in silence once more and you both linger outside of your chambers, both wanting to say something but having no idea what to say. 
“Thank you for dining with me tonight, my Prince.” you nod your head and go to turn into your chambers. 
“Aemond.” your hand stops on the metal handle as his voice. You look over your shoulder at him with scrunched brows. “I’d prefer it if you called me Aemond.” he nods. 
“Have a good night, Aemond.” you smile softly at him before sealing yourself inside your chambers. 
ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত
masterlist 🔌
next chap tomorrow i promise x
taglist ✍️
@ka1afbr @ninihrtss @daintylittlesunflower @primroseluna @alexxavicry @misspendragonsworld @papichulo120627 @ashovertheriver @gabriella-aesthetic @moonymoo1 @faenyra @uwuuness @lizzylovebooks280501 @nostalgiagoth03 @multilover19 @summer-and-sunflowers @eternalwinters @rere10
72 notes · View notes
fuckyeahmhawkefenris · 2 days ago
Text
I promised myself that I would never ever bring it up because I have enough stress in my life already and these discussions take up a lot of time and energy and require a lot more witt and eloquence than I posess.
But.
This wound has been out there for many many years, and I feel that now it starts festering again, and since I have taken it upon myself to preserve our history, I feel that it would be simply wrong to remain silent when I have something to say.
So, you probably know I make fenhawke renders in XPS using models extracted from da2.
My Fenris model uses these textures
Tumblr media Tumblr media
But I must point out that I had to manually edit them to look like this, because the original game textures look like this:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
(I believe they do, because the dude who shared the models only did the extracting, and is not known for editing textures)
Want to know why I did what I did?
Because I spent much much MUCH more time looking at fanart of Fenris, than playing the actual game, and at some point it started feeling wrong to me to have him so pale. My vision of him was influenced by the fandom.
That doesn't change the fact that THAT's how he looks in the game.
Can you see where I'm going with this?
Come and tell me that it's impossible to take him for a generic white dude.
Racism is bad, duh
Whitewashing dark skinned characters is bad, DUH
Many of you may have gotten immersed in the wide world of modding (I can't do it, all known mods change too much about Fenris for my liking, and I need him to have his iconic features), but
can we please stop pretending that Fenris in the original game was obviously depicted as dark skinned?
Because that's some stupid bullshit that had caused and still causes a great number of people, mostly artists (often casual fans), a lot of distress, and outright promotes bullying hiding it behind an image - illusion - of social justice.
Yeah, in 2014 we got Dorian and Krem and some others in DAI, finally seeing what people of Tevinter look like.
But guess what? In 2012 we had no idea, and could only guess. Back then we actually had discussions about this, offering opinions and not being afraid to talk? In 2012 we did not really know how to portray Fenris, and artists made their own choices.
In da2 the only tevinters we encountered were
Tumblr media
For the best, probably, because had they been depicted as dark skinned, that would have likely become a case of some very unfortunate implications. Looks pretty hopeless to me, either way.
ETA: and of course I forgot Fenris's SISTER
Tumblr media
I'm not saying that racism is not an issue in this fandom. It is, obviously, like anywhere else.
But can you imagine a person who played DA2 (exclusively, without getting into DAO or DAI or trying to explore the fandom and looking at more fanart), taking a liking to Fenris and deciding to make fanart of him and sharing it with the fandom, and then having angry anons come to their ask box accusing them of racism? For depicting Fenris in the only way that is known to them?
Think about it for a minute.
I've witnessed a number of such happenings over my time here, and I've been around since 2012.
Tumblr media
If you take the time to look at our old fanart, you'll find various depictions of Fenris. Some darker, some lighter, but back then NOTHING could be considered wrong, because we had too little to go on.
It would have been funny had it not been so bloody SAD to see older pictures circulating the net and read comments filled with rage and hurt over whitewashing brown characters.
I get it, you want to fight for justice, but THIS is not JUSTICE.
That right there is some act 3 Meredith level of lunacy seeing blood magic everywhere and condemning innocent mages.
Before you decide to go harass an artist who made a picture that does not match your vision, take a few minutes to think about how justified it would be. Weigh your options and at least choose your words carefully.
I shudder to think how many potential fans had been put off and turned away from this fandom, left wondering wth is wrong with us.
63 notes · View notes
heartilywrites · 2 hours ago
Text
hold me, console me and then i'll leave without a trace; c. hyunju
Tumblr media
request guide | masterlist
summary: how easy is for a person to disappear from the face of the earth?
cw: mentions of transphobia, blood and acts of violence ; angst ; cho hyunju x fem!reader ; open ending ; no use of y/n
wc: 1.9k
a/n: you have to know i adore to do angst, i would like to apologize publicly— THIS IS MY SPECIAL 200 FOLLOWERS thank u to the 200 people who followed me lov u. hope y'all enjoy this one <3 it was 100% inspired by no one noticed by the marias, that song reminds me of hyunju so i had to do this sorry-
Tumblr media
Fire red was all you could see, your whole vision was dyed in this vibrant color while your hands closed tighter over a metal bar you found laying around in the alley the group of boys were taunting over your friend.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Hey,” you called for them, the whole group turned unbothered. Hyunju? She looked scared for her life. “Why don't you tease on someone your size?”
The group started to giggle while your friend shook her head, asking you silently to stop, but you didn’t care. You wouldn’t stop as long as they kept bothering your only friend.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Look at her! Oh, I’m so scared!” the so noticeable leader tried to intimidate you, when he turned to laugh with his friends an empty sound made noise. You had hit him with the bar on the head, causing him to scream in pain and turn back to you.
When you lifted up the bar again everyone started running away, you took the chance to kneel beside Hyunju who was protecting her body however she could. A small ‘Are you okay?’ was heard from you when she uncovered her face, at the sight of blood you frowned.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Stay here, I’ll be right back.” and with that you took the bar again.
Screaming all types of insults you started running behind the group of boys who didn’t get far to give them what you called divine justice. Five against one and even then you were able to win the fight.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Ah, that hurts!” the moan came along with a grimace, jumping away from the little cotton filled with alcohol.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I told you you don’t need to protect me.” Hyunju scolded again, while cleaning your wounds. “I’m okay on my own.”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “They’re idiots,” you growled while looking in your messy backpack for what you wanted to find. A crooked smile began to paint your face thanks to the open wound on your lip, you handed Hyunju the little bottles of nail polish. “I took them from a store, your favorite colors.”
Brown eyes began to glow with excitement which was quick to shut down on their own, Hyunju captured on her face a hurt grimace, as if she was the one hurting by open wounds.
You looked at the crystal bottles on your hand and then over to your friend.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Hyun, it’s okay… They’ll look cute on your hands!” you extended your hand over to her, asking for her own without actually saying the words. “You trust me, don’t you?”
The girl looked at you for a second before turning back to the bottles and then again you, a small smile began to decorate her lips.
Nail polish, bracelets, necklaces, hair pins, small earrings, any type of accessory Hyunju would look for longer than three seconds you made your mission to get for her, since your teenage years all the way up to your adult life. You’ve known each other for a handful of years, being there for her at any moment, it didn’t matter the rain, thunder or lightning, you were usually a call away from her.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “You don’t need that, let them have their fuckass pillow.” you took it from her hand and threw it back to the old couple at the entrance of the house.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Be respectful of your elders, young lady!” the man screamed while the woman was crying, you stopped loading with the few things Hyunju took from her parents house and looked back.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Me? You’re talking to me?” before you could take any further steps, the tall woman took you by the shoulders to pull you. “I don’t need to respect shitty people!”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Let’s go, please,” the woman begged with a shaky voice. “I want to go. Let’s just go.”
At any time of the day, one call away from her.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Cho Hyunju,” your voice answered the nurse asking, the number of her room was given and only because you were already scolded you didn’t run to her.
Sitting in a hospital bed, Hyunju turned her face to you when the door was suddenly open. “I’m sorry.” was all she could say with a worried look you two shared. “The car…”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “The car is the least of my worries, you scared me, who was the idiot who hit you?” your feet were quick to get closer to you. “What did the doctors say?”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “That I’m okay, I can go home tomorrow… I mean, today in a couple of hours.” she corrected herself after remembering how it was almost four in the morning.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Next time you have cravings for food you wake me up and we’ll go together, okay?” your hand left ephemeral caresses on her face, fearing you’d hurt her.
In her bad and her worst.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I say we ask for a loan under your father’s name.” you tried to joke, cutting the meat and giving her more pieces of it. When looking up at her face, you sighed at her anxious grimace. “Hyunju, don’t worry about it now, we’ll figure out how to pay our debts.”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Three hundred and thirty million…” she let out on a distracted tone, you stopped cutting the meat, letting the sizzling sound of it cooking be the only one on your table.
You left the utensils on the table and reached for her hand, leaving caresses with your thumb. “We’ll get the money, okay? We may have to eat store bought ramen for a couple of months, but we will pay off your debt.”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “What about your debts?” she asked quickly, resting her other hand on top of the one she was holding.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I’ll figure it out, it’s not the end of the world. There’s people who live in debt until they die… Maybe I’ll be one of those, who knows? There’s worse ways to live.” you shrugged and winked at her. “Now, let’s eat this delicious meat we got ourselves by getting slapped by a weird man!”
With a more relaxed giggled, Hyunju took the chopsticks by her side so you two could start to eat.
You’d been approached by the salesman with such a curious offer, both of you had gotten a card with a number on it and had decided to decline the offer to play games. Sure, it was easy money, but what was the catch of it? You wouldn’t risk your lives just because you were offered easy money to pay off all your debts… Right?
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I would like to file a missing person report.” you said to the policeman on the entrance of the station, your hands shaking and even in fear you tried to stay composed.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Name?” the man asked while reaching for a board with papers.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Cho, Cho Hyunju.” you answered quickly, looking at his hand.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “When was the last time you saw her?” he asked now in such a monotone voice that made you mad.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Last night.” you answered back, the police’s eyes looked up to you like you were joking.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “That’s not even twenty-four hours, you need to wait.” your heart stopped, what?
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “No, no, no, you have to be kidding. You have to do something! She lives with me, she went missing last night! She never came back home!” you spoke so fast without even stumbling on your words that even you surprised yourself. “Her phone is off, you have to do something!”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Twenty-four hours.” he repeated while looking directly into your eyes. “Next in line!”
Hyunju was better than that, she wouldn’t go to this sketchy recruitment call for some sketchy games, right? She definitely wasn’t so desperate… Was she?
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Hi, excuse me. Have you seen this woman?” you’d approach strangers with a photo of Hyunju displaying on your phone.
Most people would look at the picture for a split second and shake their heads, others wouldn’t even turn their eyes to you. You wouldn’t blame them, life was chaotic for everyone.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Hyunju, it’s me again… Please call me, I’m still waiting for you.” a quick message was said after the robotic box asked you to leave a message. “I want to know if you’re okay.”
Your days would consist of hiding from your creditors asking for their money and going through every hospital asking for the woman, if she was in any room or… or at any morgue, praying you wouldn’t have to recognize her body, feeling nauseous every time you were taken to the morgue only to feel at ease when you didn’t recognize the poor woman on the table.
You would go after to the police station asking for any updates for the report, not missing a second, the police officer in charge already knew you by the amount of times you have gone to the station, everytime you crossed gazed he simply shook his head.
The nights were the hardest to deal with, you tried to stay out of your house as much as possible, only coming back to sleep and shower. Usually when you opened the door you immediately regretted it, almost turning back out. In your bed there were a couple of clothes that still smelled like her that you liked to keep close to, others had run out of her scent and it made you feel empty.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Why don't you just move out?” one of your few friends asked one day when you wouldn’t go home.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “That’s her home too…” you whispered while playing with a piece of cloth. “What if she comes back one day?”
What if she comes back? What if she doesn’t have anywhere to stay? What if she looks for you? What if, what if, what if. Your life circled around those questions ever since that day.
What if you told her you loved her? Would she still go to those games? Would she tell you she loved you back? Could the confession of your deepest secrets make her stay by your side? Would she run away regardless? Even if you tried to think like Hyunju, you couldn’t find any coherent answers to your thousands of questions and she was gone now, you were completely left alone to deal with your own feelings and broken heart.
Maybe time will help you heal, there was a chance that things could get better. But, would they really get better? At some point, were you able to rebuild your life without her after building it around Hyunju? Maybe time will make things worse, maybe picking up the pieces of your heart would result in a deep cut which you wouldn't be able to heal from and there was no one to blame, there was no good or bad side of the story, you were sure Hyunju had her reasons, but why did it hurt so bad? You felt like someone had taken the air out of your lungs and now? Now not a single soul could help you out, you were completely alone.
35 notes · View notes
lizzychanstuffss · 1 day ago
Text
Remembrance: Love and Deepspace AU 4 (Rewritten)
Au premise: So, what if mc actually remembered everytime she's reincarnated, and what if she regrets the choices she's made in every single reincarnation and is finally using this timeline to try and fix it once she realizes this might be her only chance. But she is entirely unsure if the boys remember their past lives with her, so she must navigate all these feelings along with judging if they remember too. AN: So this is a rewrite of my orginal Sylus fic due to me now having access to his myth and being able to more properly reference details. Also now I am uploading these are their own fics to AO3. So if you prefer to read them there here you go [Link] Also I might write one of these for Caleb at some point but it will be a bit due to me needing details from his myths.
Sylus x mc | Sylus x Y/N | Angst | Alternate Universe| Route: Sylus | Other Routes
The bait was set, you had drunk from the black glass and let it be known you had information about the aether core. Of course that wasn't the entire truth but the general masses didn't need to know that.
Turning around on the stool as you looked out to the crowd, a black dress wrapped around your figure as you slowly stood. You hoped this would lead you to whoever killed your grandma and Caleb. They had to be here, or at the very least someone who had a lead had to be here and all you had to do was wait for the right moment.
As you walked through the crowd mindlessly your thoughts wondered on everything you had experienced. There was a tightness in your chest as your memories soon clouded with the past you shared a man and his white hair and pricing red eyes. A sigh left your lips before you were brought back to the present by a hand grabbing your arm and you looked to see who it was.
Just a random man, but his face screamed trouble so before he could do anything you disarmed him with a small scoff before continuing through the crowd without too much care for yourself. Before something partially blinded you with a spotlight, out of reflex covering your face before realizing it was some kind of eye. As fast as it observed you it moved away.
'That can't be good' was all you could think of before you were surrounded by a crowd of people. Without warning they began to attack you and so you started to defend yourself before feeling the sting of something being injected into you and then your vision starting to get hazy. As someone appeared beside you showing off the syringe that contained the neurotoxin now running through your system before everything went dark.
You woke up barely able to process what was happening but you could gather that you were in the backseat of a car, and someone was driving you somewhere. The drug still in effect in your system made you to tired to be able to stay away much longer then a few minutes before it went dark again.
You were awoken this time by someone dragging you out to a graveyard. Trying your best to sit up you looked up at the man your vision still hazy from the drugs as his words and form slowly became more clear.
"core where is it?" Was all you managed to catch from his questioning. Giving him a confused look but he seemed to yell a question at you that you couldn't catch.
Before you knew it he was brandishing a pocket knife in front of you causing you to move back in reflex before he grabbed the strap of your dress and pulled you close the knife under your chin. The edge slightly digging into your skin as he asked again this time more clear.
"The aethercore, where is it?!" He questioned. prompting you to roll your eyes in response.
"You know there are better way to ask me that then drugging me and threats" You laughed weakly. He then dropped you as you looked up at him you noticed what you through were tendrils of black and red mist. Raising a brow confused by this as the man was quickly surrounded by someone's evol although you had no idea from where or who exactly.
Then from behind two men met you on either side wearing masks. They went over to the man's duffle bag and started to rumage through it as your kidnapper was then taken out by the mist. Although the two matching men seemed unbothered by the display.
"He didn't really have much in here" One of them spoke, before turning to the catherdial prompting you to look over as a figure somewhat blurred from the drugs jumped off and landed nearby and then began to walk over to you?
Slowly the figure came into form and the words were leaving you before you could thinking clearly.
"Sylus why are you here?" The whole interaction seemed like a dream to you. Although that question prompted him to freeze only a moment almost as if he wasn't sure of what he just heard before leaning down and then speaking.
"What do you think I'm doing here?" His tone has a strange intimidating quality to it, one you hadn't heard in years. You weren't scared but you were confused as things mixed together. Why exactly would he be here I mean obviously you were here to get information and he was here...?
"I don't know....taking a walk, although I kinda expected you to fly" Those words seemed to shock him, his expression mixed with many emotions although you weren't entirely sure why. Trying to reach out for him you were quickly stopped by your own body letting out a slightly frustrated sigh. Before you knew it though he was taking you into his arms like he hadn't been able to hug you in years. You were confused but enjoyed how warm he was as you melted into the embrace.
"I'm tired let's go home" Was all you could think about as you began to slowly drift back into sleep unable to process much else.
As you woke up it was certainly a confusing scene. You were dressed in the dress shirt of someone that wasn't you and there was red sheets covering you. Looking around slowly you took in the room around you before leading on the sleeping man beside you.
It's him, you're in his bed
Was the thought that flowed through your mind as you slowly moved to sit up to look at him almost in disbealif. You tried to remember the events of last night but most of it was hazy except for a few things.
He knows you remember
The words crashed through your mind as your heart rate started to rise. As you moved away from him as quickly as possible rushing to get out of the sheets as you held your chest. The commotion of course caused Sylus to wake up. He looked over at you obviously concerned, he rushed over to you before stopping in front of you as you put your hands out of in front of you.
"W-what happened last night?" There was a fear in your voice, but not of him. Of his reaction and yet he stepped back giving you space before speaking slowly trying to calm you down before your panic attack got any worse.
"First you need to breath, then we can talk." The words not entirely coming through to you but enough you could understand what he was asking. Slowly you took in a shakey breath, calming down enough to speak.
"Are you okay?" He asked this time now slowly approaching you again but not touching you.
"Not really but what happened last night..." You couldn't meet his gaze as you crossed your arms.
"First, what do you remember?" He asked trying to gauge what he needed to fill you in on.
"Not much, I got drugged at the Nest and then there was a graveyard, you were there....and that's it" Squeezing your arms into yourself as you spoke and you could tell he was starting to realize as well.
"I told you didn't I?" You finally bit the bullet to his surprise. "That I remember our past life together, that's the only reason I could think as to why I would wake up in your bed and in your clothes" You slowly met his gaze.
"Yes" He calmly answered, his expression was solem to say the last and yet the one emotion you thought he would have never appeared.
"Why don't you hate me? I'm the reason you're even here!" The words were spoken with frustrated sadness.
"And I made you kill me, so we're even" Was all he said, you're the one who was shocked before you felt tears starting to fall. And without another word, you feel his embrace and hand rubbing your back gently comforting you. He picked you up before bringing you back to bed stilling holding you as he let you cry out all the tears you needed.
"I'm sorry for making you do that" He said, slowly you looked up at him.
Sniffling as you spoke "And I cursed you to only die by my hand, so we're even" A slightly cheeky smile crossed your lips as he couldn't help but laugh at your words.
31 notes · View notes
heartbeatbookclub · 2 days ago
Text
I've attempted cobbling together multiple different full-length essays on my thoughts on Yuri being autistic, something i've referenced multiple times on this blog virtually every time I do any deeper analysis of her character, partially as a means of pressuring myself, but mostly because I really don't think there's a way I can understand her character without this as a baseline. It's something that's really fundamental to how I see her character, and as something of an autist myself, it's something I feel pretty strongly about.
I've attempted making multiple full-length pieces on this. Emphasis on attempted. So, rather than doing a true full length analysis, I thought I'd just throw myself in and go a bit off the cuff.
Understanding is what follows Trust, quite literally immediately after. I think I've been underserving my point (and my own understanding) every time I've talked about the Side Stories directly without addressing the formatting and overall themes. I've got an extremely old draft trying to enunciate my fuller thoughts on it, but I doubt I'll ever take that anywhere, so here's this now: I think probably the broadest theme across all of them comes down to something like connection. Communication, miscommunication, words left unsaid and the fact that you never really know what's going on inside someone's head. And despite all of the individual problems which can create conflict and breed disconnect, the Literature Club is formed with the intent of being a club for everyone, where each person can come and feel safe expressing themselves, with the hope that they could find community. Which they succeed in.
I think, really, when you look at DDLC as a whole, its entire point can be condensed within this idea, and both the Side Stories and Base Game are just two different ways of viewing it. This post puts it pretty well, I think. There's this constant emphasis on the unseen side of someone, just beneath the surface.
"Can you hear me?"
Anyway, my broader point in leading with that is, each of the titles refer to specific ideas which the stories they contain deal with in great detail, usually as a central element to a given conflict, and revolving around some central thing that needs to be learned (further emphasized in Equals). They're obstacles to the connection they're trying to create. These traits are instrumental, both in terms of building the club as it comes to be, and in bringing each of the characters closer together, solidifying the connection between them in spite of their differences. I think in general you could also describe them as fundamental traits that go into creating the Literature Club as a concept, particularly on terms of the vision as a place people can feel comfortable expressing themselves in.
Trust is all about the relationship built between Sayori and Monika, and the...well, trust they build with each other. The trust they invest in one another, that leads to them sharing some of their deepest secrets with each other. It also, I think, represents the trust that's necessary in the environment they're trying to create (It's difficult to express your true self if you don't trust the people you're expressing yourself to, after all!) I think Trust sets out the modus operandi which the rest of the stories operate under; in order to create the environment which Sayori and Monika envisioned at the start, there are a few essential hurdles which need to be crossed.
I think Understanding having direct continuity from Trust is important in that sense. It's a direct showcase of their vision in action; from creating it in Trust, to making it a reality in Understanding. And in that sense, it showcases the first major hurdle they have to get over.
To get away from the whole subtextual analysis thing, Yuri's introduction does a lot in a short period to establish the kind of person she is. As Monika puts it: "intense". She jumps straight in to talking about her books as soon as she's sure she's in the right place, in a way that awkwardly (but effectively!) side-steps the attempt at introductions which Monika and Sayori give (a theme that becomes common as the story goes on), and gets straight to her point, that she wants to join their club, and that she really wants to share her books with them.
I also can't go on without at least mentioning this adorable little moment--
Tumblr media
It's really obvious from the outset here that Yuri is very excited to have found a place where she can talk about her books; a place filled with people who seem to share a common interest with her, where she can find like-minded people to make friends with based on her love of fantasy literature. In fact, she seems so taken with this idea that she doesn't even seem to notice Monika or Sayori being put off at all by how overexcited she is. She gets so caught up in her own thoughts on the matter, in fact, that without a second thought with regard to the social consequence, she takes off to go and get her books once she realizes she didn't bring them.
I gotta be honest, I don't think Yuri was really paying attention to how this conversation was going, not to dig on her. There's a particular reason for that, I think.
I think she spent a whole lot of time running this entire moment over in her head, again and again.
That might seem like an obvious assumption, but I have some specific reasons why I think that, like the fact that she forgot Monika's name two separate times, or that she says she took the flier immediately but had to work up the courage to come in. I'd say even the fact that she feels the need to say that she "should be good enough" to join their club (as though there's a skill based barrier to entry in a school hobbyist club?) indicates that she probably spent a lot of time creating imaginary standards to check herself against just to be sure she'd be up to snuff in any serious literary debates.
I think her idea of a "Literature Club" is fairly similar to what MY idea of what a Literature Club would be when I first heard the title, and what I'm sure a lot of other people kind of envisioned: something like a book club. For books. And people who read books. Made for people to come in and talk about books. As a consequence, I think she excited herself building this idea in her head of a club at her school, filled with her peers, where she could go in person to meet like-minded people to talk with about something she's truly passionate about. It's all of these factors together that lead me to thinking she probably came in with a very one-track plan in mind, potentially as simple as "see if anyone there likes fantasy, see if anyone there likes annabelle dupont, makes friends by talking about annabelle dupont!" after doing a lot of thought on the matter, and considering a lot of what could go wrong.
I think that's why she pushes past the introductions quickly, and why she's so resistant to (or, maybe better put, uninterested in) small talk. When she came in, she had a few very specific, and very important thoughts in mind. She wanted to see if anyone in the club shared her specific interest, and she wanted to join their club. The introductions, the social element? That was mostly secondary to her real desire here. I'd say she even saw it more like an obstacle to what she wanted to do.
And this introduction, with this context in mind, leads me to a very particular idea about Yuri's whole deal.
Yuri is very passionate about literature, in particular a specific fantasy series by Annabelle DuPont, which she is very happy to gush about at length with likeminded people. Yuri lacks a great deal of intuitive social awareness, and has a tendency to get caught in her own thoughts pretty easily, social consequence be damned. This in conjunction with her obsessive interests can be very clearly seen to put off people around her, and impair her own ability to recognize when other people are put off by her. She takes a rather literal, straightforward approach to things, and is mostly uninterested in introductions as opposed to a conversation about her interests.
Guys...I think she might be Literally Me.
Okay, so I'm not going to pull out a full DSM-V diagnostic criteria list here, but the emphasis on her social dysfunction combined with her obsessive interest in a particular subject (in this case, with a particular overcomplicated fiction series) are some clear indicators, but it does go a bit deeper than that, imo. It's hard to really typify, but unironically, there are a lot of things to the way she's written that I just deeply identify with as an autistic person, coupled with some dense anxiety.
The moment of her pressing her knuckles against her cheeks is a pretty obvious example of stimming, something she does in this instance because she's too excited and happy to express the feeling in any possible words. Her immediate jump into asking about fantasy I think comes from the fact that this question was on her mind and she just needed to find a moment to ask it--something I find particularly relatable as a former child who could never find a good moment to interrupt a conversation. When you have something really strong on your mind that you really want to say and you're just looking for a good moment where you can finally break in and ask it and it just seems to never present itself so you just have to break in at some point even if it's awkward--whether that statement is "I want to join your club!" or "Do you like fantasy?" or "Is your shirt a reference to this band because their music literally changed the course of my life and if you like them I wanna be your friend". I view this as something of a consequence of autistic inertia (as in, the trouble many autistic people have of switching between tasks), particularly when you have to deal with engaging in a conversation you're currently in which you'd like to steer in a particular direction--or that you just want to jut this question into. This is, in my experience, one particularly common reason an autistic person might come off as blunt or tactless in conversation: sometimes you just wanna say something and you don't know how to do it naturally or politely. (At the very least, this is a common reason I've personally been called blunt or tactless.)
And of course, since I mentioned it without focusing much on it earlier: Yuri's intense focus on her books and what she's talking about leading to her not noticing how the other two are reacting is a neat little showcase of impaired empathy, though it's also a consequence of her hyperfocus on her own train of thought in that moment.
It's also a very nuanced, and I would say exceptionally real portrayal of autistic empathy. See, I've mentioned this before on this blog, here, but there's this funny little trope with autistic characters, where due to the idea of "impaired empathy" as an autistic trait being...rather ironically taken too literally, autistic characters are often presented with this unflappable confidence of having never been rejected by other people in their life, as though they can't even empathize enough with the idea of rejection to understand that they're supposed to feel negatively about it. As a consequence, autistic characters will often be written with this constant need to be insensitive, emotionless little weirdos, and any blunt, tactless, implied or explicit insults they share are just accepted because "they're autistic lolz", and they never advance from this perspective.
This is...needless to say, not a good way to portray autism, I can speak firsthand, hi, I know a shitload of autistic people and also I am one of those, what the fuck guys, at least make me a cool terminator robot or a Ryan Gosling character or something--anyway, more bluntly, it's also just inaccurate, and speaks to a misunderstanding of what autism even is. I think most portrayals of autism in Hollywood and TV are broadly misinformed about the autistic perspective (ignoring that there isn't really a universal autistic perspective...that's a broader discussion that's not important here tho), and the way they portray autistic people's experience with empathy is probably one of the most obvious examples.
Autistic people do not have some magical lack of empathy. It's not somehow impossible for autistic people to understand (or at least relate to) your feelings. It's just that there's often this extra little gap you need to bridge to really get there. It's a bit tough to really explain past general terms like this, especially since every person's experience with autism is different, but let me just elaborate on it on terms of Yuri, because she outright defies this very Hollywood idea of impaired empathy in a pretty nice way.
When the others react to Yuri's enthusiasm, she doesn't seem to really pick up that they're uncomfortable. She doesn't seem to notice their facial expressions, or the overall tone of the conversation, or how one-sided it really is. She gets one piece of positive affirmation from Monika ("Fantasy is cool.") and immediately latches on to that, ignoring the rest of the awkwardness of the conversation around it. She's not picking up the cues here that the others aren't on the same page with her, and it's only after she receives an admittedly very minor and well-meaning bit of pushback from Sayori that she realizes she might've gone a bit far. More specifically, it pumps the brakes on her excitement and forces her to be a bit more receptive to an actual conversation, which enables her to slow down, and in that way, reflect a bit more.
She doesn't let on anything about it immediately, but the following day, she apologizes, revealing that on reflection, she decided that she was being overbearing, and didn't consider anyone else's feelings in the matter. Here, even when Sayori pushes back on that, telling her she didn't do anything wrong, she's pretty set on apologizing, acknowledging she did do something wrong, and pulling back, instead letting other people take the lead. She states (her opinion) that nobody was actually interested in her book, and instead that they were just humoring her. When Sayori pushes further, indicating that she is interested, and it's something she really wanted to do as a club activity, Yuri immediately swaps to the other end of blaming herself, immediately questioning why she's being so resistant, when she wanted to do this anyway, then apologizing for "being like this".
The anxiety on display, the immediate turn to catastrophizing about how this situation can go wrong (or already has), something we saw briefly earlier when she talked about how she thought Monika might've spoken ill of her in the club when she received the flier, that's all one thing, but what seems plainly clear here is that there's a gap which isn't being bridged. Yuri doesn't actually understand Sayori's thought process, and Sayori doesn't understand Yuri's, and that's the fundamental conflict here. That's the real gap in understanding.
And that gap, between how one person looks at a scenario and how another views it? That is, in my view, the most fundamental element of autistic empathy. That's what fuels the disconnect. There's a lot of different traits which might make up an autism diagnosis, but the differences they create on terms of thinking and behavior aren't some magical other separated from neurotypicals as a class of people; there's always some fundamental logic to it, which you just need to take the time to understand.
Digressing--there's a lot of littler things around these moments that I tie to this view, like Yuri's issues with many people, or Yuri only seeking out people to talk about literature with online. I mean, when you consider it, it is kind of obvious to check around the posted clubs to see if there were any to suit her interest...so why didn't she? I think it was intentional, though unconscious. I think her decision to come to the Literature Club was actually fairly motivated by the fact that Monika outright placed the flier in front of her, creating an impetus for her to want to join, besides the fact that it seemed like it was perfectly made for her. There's now an active pressure for her to go, as opposed to a passive "oh that sounds nice..." you'd get from seeing it on the walls.
There's also that little back and forth between her, Sayori, and Monika, where she quickly focused on the framework Sayori created on the conversation rather than anything else (you say something, then I have to say something), then immediately struggled as Sayori broke that framework to do a quick bit with Monika, before turning back to her. Again, I think there's more struggle here with figuring out when it's her turn in a conversation, which is probably a big part of why she prefers to stay quiet.
On to them reading, there are even more little things, like Yuri's particular way of explaining the lore, introducing the series, and using paper to take notes and detail her thought process (which individually indicates that she seems to have a very particular and seemingly meticulous way she likes to enjoy her favorite series, and her desire to share it in EXACTLY the way she likes it, so she can be sure to get all of what she views to be most important about it, and of course, a need to be organized to keep all of her thoughts together and help visualize everything; this kind of alternative thing isn't just an autism thing, but autistic people tend towards using alternate forms of communication and visualization to help understand something in their own particular way, more on that disconnect), as well as that not so subtle example of her not picking up on Sayori's extremely mild sarcasm, or the fact that "you can't generalize intelligence" is quite possibly the most technical and autistic way of downplaying a compliment I've ever read committed to word. Oh, and Yuri's indignant little response to Sayori writing nonbook notes on the book notes page, minor and offhand as it is, indicates further that Yuri's a stickler for details.
Once they start reading, we see more of the actual issues Sayori has, which fills out the rest of the conflict. Both of them end up stuck in their head. In Sayori's case, her own inferiority complex builds this progressive sense that she's not doing good enough for Yuri, and that must be why she's not having a good time. Meanwhile Yuri becomes convinced that Sayori is just patronizing her (despite all appearances), in large part because of her past experiences with others, which I think is an especially important thing to address.
I've already touched a bit on the following conversation between Monika and Yuri here, but this part kinda just lays a lot of it bare. Yuri's great at talking about her interests, but struggles with anything else. She has a lot of trouble doing this kind of social reflection and trying to figure out what other people are thinking. She doesn't know how to bridge that gap. She's really bad with other people...and she's accepted that.
I think that's an especially important thing at play here, and it's where this whole conflict comes from.
Monika's able to bridge the gap in the first place, because she knows what to say to direct the conversation in a useful direction--to make Yuri trust her, and trust that it's okay for Monika to act in her interest, because she's club president. It's her job to try to help everyone feel welcome. Then, as they talk, she's finally able to work out what Yuri's actual problem is, peeling the wall back between them with trust, then bridging the gap with understanding. And Monika does understand! Because Sayori and Yuri...aren't so different.
Both Sayori and Yuri have this constant preoccupation with the fact that they aren't good enough. Yuri, in particular understands that she's an awkward, deeply weird person, and she can accept that about herself. Everybody seems to have one of a few different reactions to her. Realizing that she's weird, and awkward, and makes people uncomfortable...well, the only reason people must appear to be accepting of her is because they want to make her feel better about herself. To allow them to make themselves uncomfortable, to deal with all of her inability to be a more socially conscious and considerate person...that'd be evil. She'd feel guilty doing that. And the thought that she could be doing that to someone because she doesn't understand that they are just humoring her? That's one of the worst feelings in the world.
As a consequence of all of this, and her constant preoccupation with not doing that, with not taking advantage of another person's kindness, she overcorrects. She assumes that other people can only tolerate her being herself, being who she is, and not actually like her. They're patronizing her to pretend, and so the only way she can truly be accepted is by suppressing herself, or just not even participating.
She thought the Literature Club might be different, but the thing of it is, she is the problem. Not because she's somehow uniquely unlovable or because she's just gotta pull herself together and can't, but because her entire view of the situation is off.
I think a big part of this comes down to Yuri's previous experience with social rejection, which isn't directly detailed here, but is at least tacitly expressed. And I think a lot of this view of herself, as though she's some uniquely socially broken weirdo who will never truly fit in anywhere she goes, and can only find tolerance, not true acceptance, likely in some part comes from that rejection. That's probably why she focuses so much on her own interests, and in talking with people about them online.
That's probably why Yuri wasn't looking for a club that suited her interests at all. And it's why the Literature Club was something she really, really needed.
This...in particular, is why my view of Yuri's whole deal is specifically undiagnosed autism, and it's actually a pretty big part of why the entire thing sort of clicks for me.
Because fun fact! I didn't even have an inkling that I might be autistic until I was 19, despite plenty of evidence. The only reason I'm actually not diagnosed (shock, awe!) is the fact that my parents fought the school board on it so I wouldn't be placed in special ed. That's a whole other conversation, back to my point; A lot of Yuri's reflection on her social struggles is very relatable to me personally, particularly with her difficulties understanding why she is the way she is, and the shame that creates. Not even just in Understanding--a lot of what happens, a lot of what she talks about throughout the Side Stories is something I personally find relatable in a way that's hard to conceptualize for me without tying it to my own autistic experience.
To finish, I'll brush over a few quick thoughts and then talk about the conclusion in Understanding a little.
Both during the conversation with Monika and leading up to her breaking down in tears, Yuri has these sudden little outbursts; things she says before she even realizes she's saying them (This is something that happens in Self-Love, too!), and I just wanted to mention it, since I've done it too, sometimes. I've talked quite a bit before about how Yuri tries to keep a handle on her emotions, but when she does get emotional, things spill out. This is an especially common form of masking ("sometimes, masking is fighting to appear aloof at all times because emotion comes out too strongly to be controlled and expressed in a socially acceptable way"), and this particular kind of emotional outburst and breakdown is something which is a common consequence of it. It's gotta come out at some point, and when you're so used to maintaining that kind of control over yourself, emotional regulation can be especially difficult.
AND THEN SAYORI BRIDGES THE GAP BECAUSE SHE'S THE GOOOOOAAAAAATTTTTT--
ahem.
Sayori bridges the gap because she's the goat. finds her own way to peel back Yuri's walls. Just in time, too...
Creating a path for the two of them to be honest with each other, and (albeit...unintentionally?) preventing her from running away, all but forcing her to take her kindness to heart. Yuri finally just drops all pretenses and lets out all of the thoughts she's had this whole time. Monika created an environment where she could feel safe expressing these thoughts and not feel judged, and convinced Yuri that it would be the same with Sayori. So she's spilling her guts as a part of learning to trust other people. Now that she has, it's on Sayori to finish it, and bridge that gap. Mend the divide.
Yuri's speech, obviously, just reinforces everything I've been saying thus far. She wants to be a normal person, at her core. But she isn't normal. She knows that.
And the reason she's here is because she wants to make more friends...but this hasn't gone at all how she's expected. It hasn't gone to plan at all.
Sayori's here to show her that that's okay. Sometimes, things are messy. People are messy. It's not something that's easy to understand, and that's okay, you don't need to, totally.
And in turn, she shares her own anxieties, her own problems that she's been having, which shocks Yuri. This is another little element of empathy, but more of what I think this represents is self-image vs how others view you. Yuri points out--she did all she could to reassure her! She would never get frustrated with her while they were reading. She knows that.
But Sayori doesn't, and moreover other people can't just peek directly inside your head.
So to get these things across, you need to talk them out. Without communicating with each other, it's impossible to understand each other. People aren't mind readers.
But Yuri, being autistic, needs a great deal more help communicating, both on terms of understanding others, and explaining herself so others can understand. She says herself--she doesn't have good communication, so she needs others willing to reach out a little to bridge that gap, which is what the Literature Club is for.
Tumblr media
Oh yeah and Yuri's comment about getting people's consent to be touched makes me chuckle because that's some shit I'd do. You know she was thinking about that from day one but didn't want to be rude about it, and now that they're being honest with one another, she's gotta say it, even just at the end of that huge emotional conversation. That's another point for bluntness.
This has been something I've had in the drafts for months, almost a year by now. It's the last major character analysis type deal I still had outstanding, and I've got piles and piles of notes. I've watched back over Understanding multiple times for material, and I have (as mentioned) multiple unfinished versions of this analysis. I wouldn't call this perfect, but it says most of what I've wanted to say for a while, including referencing most of the other major posts I've made on the subject. I might have more to say on the subject later, I might even correct a few things on this later, but as yet, these are my thoughts. She's got that certified autistic rizz guys
36 notes · View notes
haine-kleine · 18 hours ago
Text
what I find the most annoying about s2's drop in quality is not even the disservice done to the characters and the story of s1 but how the writers weaponized fanon and it actually WORKED. all the things fans wanted to see are there - the found family themes, Caitvi, Jinx's healing and joining the 'good guys', Viktor coming out of Jayce's shadow and doing his thing, Mel going from a damsel in distress to a badass mvp, Jayvik, Timebomb, did I mention Caitvi,...
but here's the thing: while all of those things do indeed happen, they happen with minimal or no development at all. this is why on a closer inspection s2 feels like fanfiction, and for an official show that's a bad thing. not because fanfiction in itself is bad, or that fulfilling fan's wishes is inherently bad, but because fanfiction is commonly motivated by self-indulgence. we take the characters we like and put them into situations we want to see them in. in fanfiction there's no strict need to development, you can do whatever you want with the characters and no one is there to stop you. if the character in the show ends up in point b, a fanfiction writer has no obligation to outline how they get to point c, they can just start with the character where they want them to be.
but fanfiction rules only work for fanfiction. when you write your original show which painstakingly developed each and every character and throw them around like chess figurines where you need them to be, this breaks the suspension of disbelief. I spent my s2 watch from act 2 onwards with that feeling. all the development is neatly cut out and the characters go to the points they are supposed to go with barely any work of the writers involved.
Jinx is supposed to be more mentally stable and become responsible? a child literally drops on her head and immediately becomes obsessed with her. Ekko is supposed to forgive Jinx and see past her current unstable, destructive self? he is transported to a canon divergent!au with the singular purpose of hanging out with au!mentally stable!Powder. there's no development of his relationship with Jinx afterwards, all we get is a beginning of a conversation and the next time we see them they are suddenly besties/in love/option c. Jayce needs to kill Viktor and so he does, his reasoning? the visions from the alternate universe™ told him to. how awfully convenient. how does Viktor himself go from a good hearted, motivated to help others but keenly critical of his and Jayce's methods man from s1 to a crazy messiah who watched The end of Evangelion too much? the visions from the hexcore are controlling him! i can't even.
the problem is not even the (bad) direction the story took a deep dive towards but the execution. they barely bother to develop the characters and when they do at all, they use the cheapest tricks, heavily sprinkling fanservice on top so that people don't pay too much attention. the worst victim of this writing is Vi, who is such a non-character that after her failure in act1 she literally has to be dragged around by Jinx or Caitlyn. the same girl whose single-minded motivation to find her sister sparked half of the s1 plot. and now she lets her sister go kill herself because the writers want her to have hot lesbian sex with Caitlyn. who went from a good-hearted but naive and privileged girl to fascist war criminal and then back to a good guy and the only way the could show this development of hers is throw Vi at her like they are dolls and making them kiss.
in conclusion, theoretically, disappointingly, from the characters' development standpoint, s2 has pretty much everything we could wish for after s1. unfortunately, the level of writing execution equates to turning off sim's freedom of will and manually making them do everything that would make fans happy.
and if I wanted that, I would just go to ao3.
28 notes · View notes
litrly-justagirl · 14 hours ago
Text
Be THAT GIRL in 2025
Hey loves, let’s talk about something that’s been heavy on my heart—vision boards, and why they might not be working for you. It hit me when I realized: so many vision boards are missing the secret ingredient—God’s guidance. We can stick as many dreamy pictures on that board as we want, but without God at the center, we’re just throwing darts in the dark.
Vision boards are not just about making pretty collages. They’re about faith moves. The truth is, we’ve all been guilty of setting our own plans and goals, but so often they aren’t in alignment with what God truly has in store. We chase what we want, instead of what He’s calling us to.
Recognizing Where You’re Misaligned Misalignment looks like this:
• Thinking you know better than God. • Getting frustrated with His timing when it’s taking longer than you imagined. • Forgetting that true success is rooted in surrender, not just hustle.
But here’s the kicker: when you align your dreams with His will, everything starts to fall into place. It’s like switching from blurry vision to crystal clear. When you’re walking in alignment with Him, you’re not just manifesting wishes—you’re walking in purpose.
Shifting to a Vision with Purpose Creating a faith-based vision board means seeing your dreams through God’s eyes. It’s about setting goals that honor Him, then taking the action steps to make them real. Here’s how to make that shift:
Submit Your Plans to Him It all begins with surrender. Proverbs 16:9 says it best: “People can plan what they want to do, but it is the Lord who guides their steps.” Stop trying to force your plan and trust that His plan is always better.
Take Action, Not Just Wishes Faith without works is dead. Dreaming without doing is like saying you want to eat and never getting up to cook. If you’ve got dreams, get moving. Whether it’s launching that business, starting that book, or stepping into a new career, take the first step.
Stay Consistent Consistency is key. Whether it’s your vision board, your fitness goals, or your faith journey, it’s the steady effort that brings the breakthroughs. Trust the process and stay the course. Keep your eyes on the bigger picture—God’s got you.
✨ Let’s Make 2025 Your Best Year Yet ✨ This isn’t just about creating a vision board with pretty pictures. This is about crafting a life that reflects your faith, your purpose, and the amazing plan God has for you. It’s about transforming from the inside out, stepping boldly into what He has for you.
If you're ready to get started, grab your supplies and let’s make 2025 the year that our dreams are fully aligned with His will. Drop a comment below and let me know: What’s one thing you’re believing for in your vision this year? Let’s talk about it and keep each other accountable.
💖 let's glow together girlies 💖
And before you go, if you want to stay connected and follow this journey, make sure to hit subscribe on my YouTube channel! You won’t want to miss upcoming videos that’ll help you transform your life and align your dreams with God's will. Leave a like, share this video with someone who needs this, and drop your thoughts in the comments—let’s build a community of faith, growth, and purpose together. 🙌
Let’s make it happen, loves. subscribe and join me on this glow-up journey.
Tumblr media
18 notes · View notes
professorjirt · 5 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
same image
18 notes · View notes
luck-of-the-drawings · 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
EDYN TIDESTRIDER, CHALLENGER OF THE UNDERSEA, RIVAL OF THE DEEP. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOUR BROTHER WAS CHOSEN TO BE A WEAPON OF THE GODS? HOW WILL YOU UNDO WHAT THEY HAVE DONE TO HIM?
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#edyn tidestrider#cw blood#EDYYYNNNN TTIDESTRIDERRR OHH HOW I LOVE HERRRR#THIS IS A PAGE FULLA REEAALLY OLD DOODLES AND REALLY REALLY OLD DOODELS AND NEW DOODLES. ENJOY.#ONLY CLEANED IT UP A BUNCH TTODAY AND IM ACTUALLY SO SO HAPPY W IT WEEEEE#WHAT WAS IT LIKE? DOWN IN THE UNDERSEA. TO VISIT YOUR BROTHER WHENEVER THE ADULTS WOULD LET YOU#A KID WHO DIDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT WAS GOING ON OR WHY HER BROTHER WAS BEING TAKEN AWAY OR WHY HE KEEPS GETTING HURT#OR WHY THE ADULTS JUST KEEP LETTING IT HAPPEN. ITS FOR THE BEST? FATE OF THE WORLD AND ALL THAT? HEY WHO THE FUCK IS IN CHARGE HERE#HOW DO WE STOP IT. HOW DO I STOP IT. THERES PEOPLE OUT THERE WORKING ON SOMETHING. ARITIFICIAL LEVIATHAN YOU SAY?#WE COULD BUILD A THING TO RIVAL THE GODS. WELL. SIGN ME UP. IM GOING TO UNDO WHAT THEY DID TO YOU#WHAT A FASCINATING THING SHE ACTUALLY SAID. 'IM GOING TO UNDO WHAT THEY DID TO YOU' HELLO?? EDYN? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN#WHAT EXACTLY DID THEY DO TO HIM. OTHER THAN THE PROPHECY TRAINING. YOU CAN UNDO THAT? YOU CAN UNDO ALL THAT? HOW?? HELLO???#LIKE SURE I JUST SPOUTED MY THEORIES I THINK SHE WANTS TO KILL GOD BUT THATS JUSTA THEORY... A GA#WHAT IS EDYNS GOAL AND WHY CANT SHE TELL ANYONE OOUUUHHH EDYNNNN CMERE EDYNN CMERRE STOP WALKING AWAY CMERE. COME HERE.#fuuuuuck shes so mysteriousss what is she HIDING!!shes also so so so so angry i fucken know she is. shes so gentle and so sweet and timid#but she is ANGRY and shes SMART and clearly shes AMBITIOUS bc shes TALKING TO THE FUCKING BIG HEAD HONCHO O THE FUCKEN NNAAAVYYYYY#ALSO WHO IS NICHOLAS. IF THATS EVEN HIS REAL NAME. WHO DID YYYOU MEET EDYN. DO YOU HAVE A WISH TO BE GRANTED EDYN???#CHEWING ON THE BARS O MY CELL I NNNNEEEEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT EDYN IM SO CURIOUS IMG ONNA KILL PEOPLE#i said once in another post 'the oath an eldest sister takes on is on par w that of a paladins-#-and sometimes upheld w the very same ferocity'. I REALLY LIKED THAT LINE.#pleeese... if u can hear me.. pls join me and draw edyn w unbridled plasmatic rage abt the way her brother was treated by the Elders#also pls draw her SCARY. I NEED HER TO BE SSCARY. PLEEASEE I NEED HER TO BE JUST AS VIOLENT AS GILLION BUT INA ICE COLD WAY#JUST AS VIOLENT JUST AS STRONG JUST AS MUCH OF AN AQUATIC MONSTER. im sure u see the vision.#ok i gotta go t bed now i got work in tha morning n i should nnot be stayin up this late. if u hav thoughts abt edyn pls scream abt em#okay byyyyeee goodniiigihhttttt
158 notes · View notes
undead-moth · 6 months ago
Text
I know I've been on about this for a while now and I'm being a hater but you're telling me SydCarmy was "always meant to be platonic" even though there are two seasons of writing making use of tried-and-true explicitly romantic tropes, themes and writing signals, and SydLuca is going to be romantic because...he was nice to her on screen for a few minutes?
I don't even care if people ship SydLuca, or if they just prefer it, but you can't honestly tell me that you believe Carmy was always meant to be a friend but Luca is an obvious love interest.
Just because Syd and Carmy haven't kissed or confessed their love to each other doesn't mean that isn't very obviously the direction this show is going. The Bear has already shown you who is endgame. It has shown you every episode of the show so far.
Honestly I really don't think The Bear fanbase understands this show or cares about these characters or the story being told here, which is unfortunate because this show is shockingly well-written in comparison to most shows right now, and we should be so grateful for it but all we're doing is complaining that the writers led us on by not making a ship canon fast enough. It's just. Sad.
#The Bear#SydCarmy#I was like a casual fan of this show two days ago#and now seeing how little respect this show gets from it's fanbase I'm losing my mind#I mean I shipped SydCarmy before anyway but now it means so much to me#it means so much to see such a realistic and purposefully well paced romance take place#so many shows portray romantic relationships and their beginnings in ways that just don't really happen in real life#and this show very purposefully said no. These are characters who are strangers. who are working together. Who are in a tense environment#and each of them has problems - one of them the type of problems that makes developing new relationships pretty difficult#these two would not get together right away. It would take a long time. And there would be ups and downs.#And even when that's the case. Even if when it takes a long time and doesn't go smoothly and is hard -#it can still be beautiful. It can still be romantic. It can still happen and here's how#and I'm just so inspired genuinely. It is so difficult to write romance without being cliche and so difficult to write it in a way that#could actually happen in real life and I really do hope I can write something half as good some day#and then to know so many people have no appreciation for it at all#because they prefer the shows that have characters make eye contact a few times and then confess their love for each other like#it's just fucking sad. So sad that so few people have any appreciation for good writing especially the difficult of romance writing#like I really just don't even know what to tell you. In real life these two would not have confessed to each other yet. They would not have#kissed yet. They would not have even realized they have feelings for each other yet because those feelings would still be developing#and I also want to point out that given the disparity in power between Syd and Carmy in season 1 it wouldn't have been healthy for them to#get together much sooner. He was her boss. He was also her idol. Before they can even get together that needs to be balanced out.#And then on top of that don't you see the value in Carmy realizing the dream girl he's romanticized in his head - Claire - isn't actually#what he wants? Don't you see the beauty in him being disillusioned from that? And realizing that Syd is what he wants?#Don't you see the beauty in Syd having an idealized vision of what Carmy The Great Chef is like realizing she was wrong and that he's human#and flawed and then realizing - she loves him anyway? She loves him more for not being on a pedestal and for having his flaws?#Are you telling me that even thinking about this doesn't move you? Doesn't make your heart ache a little?#And again - ship and let ship - but what is Luca? What is Luca if not just what she was hoping Carmy would be when she wen to The Beef?#What is he if not just another man who she has not seen under pressure yet? Not seen reliving trauma yet? Not been her boss yet?#It's easy to look at him and think he's better than Carmy - and that's the point. That's the point The Bear is making.#It is easy to want someone you don't know. It's hard to want to someone you do know. But that's what love requires and that's the point
51 notes · View notes
mohntilyet · 13 days ago
Note
DATV Spoilers Just in Case!) I’ve seen a head canon floating around that when solas puts a mage!Rook in the regret prison, it tranquilizes them. What do you think Viago’s reaction to this happening to a Crow!Rook would be?
i think there's a small terrible part of viago that instinctively thinks it was a bad investment/solution to send rook off with varric, since he's lost one of his best assassins. and then of course he hates that this is his first reaction because rook is more than that to him, but he's been conditioned by their lives to worry about his power and the mission first. and then i think he throws himself into trying to prove that he is a better man than that by finding a cure, without being obvious about it, even if his worry actually makes him messier and obvious. a similar outward reaction to what i've seen people headcanon about how he feels when he gets the news that rook is stuck in the fade trap in general (anger, determination, frustration, etc)
the idea of viago as a man who clings to "i rose to this rank for a reason, above the other crows. i'm a killer but with my poisons, i'm cleaner. i'm royalty. i'm better." is so beautiful to me. who he wants by his side/publically allies with is made more interesting to me for that reason. rook and teia make a very short list, so for him to lose either of them (especially to a fate worse than death. like i know there's a cure but i'm not sure if that's common knowledge and it has rammys bro) will inevitably cause a crash out the likes of which thedas may have never seen before <3
#tho also i have no fucking clue. i love viago and his high strung freakish tendencies#but a lot of this is just me thinking of viago and not necessarily this specific ask. sorry anon#there are other people on here with a better grasp on vi#and i plan to keep it this way because the moment i have to think of him as a mentor figure#it pollutes my vision board for him. LOL#i don't think i'll ever play a de riva rook because i'll ruin my own experiment#this is my control variable. it's a wildlife documentary…#just because the baby crow is about to be cannibalised doesn't mean i'm going to stop it from happening#sorry. i know i said all that and im now saying 'but idk' but its true#my understanding of viago i think is mixed at best. i have not read the comics he is in and#8 little talons is very much a high stakes scenario where he hates literally everything thats happening#so that might not be a perfect judge of character. ive never seen this guy relaxed ever#tho saying this. this is probably his default state LOL#viago de riva#txt#anonymous#answered#it just feels a bit weird for me to enjoy 'the crows are morally grey' but then be like 'not my favorite talon viago tho'#i think viago should mistreat rook. for my sake. but then i would feel weird. which is why i shouldnt speak on it#i cannot be an unbiased party LOL. like im not saying he /directly/ abused rook#because i think w his age and timelines it just wouldnt be him. but i also dont think he's fucking speaking up and going#'NO MORE CORPORAL PUNISHMENT! I'LL PROTECT YOU ROOK!'#like be serious. thats a grown man near the top of the hierarchy. just another crow so used to abuse#and double crossing and violence that he takes it as a normal and given for his life/world#which obviously. like. creates issues in his personal life. whether thats with teia or with rook. lmfao.#especially with a guy this paranoid. he just strikes me as the guy to intentionally hurt rook so others dont recognise his weakness#'they need to see me punish you so that they won't kill you' <- totally normal thought to have viago you're so normal
43 notes · View notes
hsslilly-blog · 27 days ago
Text
huntclaire divorce au. everything is exactly the same but wait i was going to make a joke here but i’m actually very invested in this
#just imagine how WEIRDER they’d be about each other. this is crazy#i need them to divorce and then hunt makes a movie immediately after and he casts claire as the lead. and the movie is weirdly personal#and everyone in the cast is like. is this movie about the divorce. no it is not. but yes it also is. hunt and claire are unaware#there's a brazilian director who divorced his wife and then cast her in his next movie andthe movie is the greatest love letter ever.to her#this is what i'm aiming for here. do you see my vision? okay so they argue all the time on set. she does NOT follow his direction#this is why i divorced you by the way you were always like. saying stuff. you're always saying stuff! you're annoying and pathetic and stup#they cannot even be NEAR each other. need to talk to either of them? do not do it while the other oneis in the room.they WILL make it weird#they will start bickering and they will forget about you i am so sorry. if they try to be civil it's like. this was so thoughtful of you!#i wish SOME PEOPLE were like this. i was actually very thoughtful you were the one who was always demanding attentionWHATof COURse I WAS!?#hunt keeps his wedding ring in his side pocket. claire loves calling him her stupid ex husband. ew my wretched ex husband.#whole time they can't keep their hands off each other. which could mean anything#why did they get divorced? no one has any idea. no one knows anything about these two actually. why would he cast her. why would they marry#why are they torturing everyone. is this like A Thing to them. yes. claire gives him cold coffee every time and he drinks it every time jus#so she doesn't get the satisfaction. also you should NOT interfere if they're arguing because then it's going to be YOUR FAULT#you may ask. hsslilly! what's the difference between this and canon huntclaire. well they're actually divorced here. see.#this means something to me. and to them too. plus they actually mean this on some level. normal huntclaire are doing a very convoluted bit#here claire would choke hunt with his tie if given the chance. and then they would make out. this happened like twice.#okay i'll stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#huntclaire#wait the blood necklace should still exist in this au
10 notes · View notes
butchlifeguard · 7 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
who up traveling they octopath
[ID: 2 images. the first is a whisper post of a cowboy sitting sadly with his elbows resting on his knees and his head in one of his hands. the caption is "is it really possible for a emo girl and a country boy to be in a relationship?" the second is a traditionally sketched redraw of alfyn from octopath traveler in the same pose. the text has been cut out from the original photo and overlaid. end ID.]
9 notes · View notes
good-beans · 3 hours ago
Note
Hi! "ML Up until now it's been like a dream" sounds interesting!
Aw thanks! I'm impressed you could scope out my one Mikoto wip...
It's a little normal au 0309 thing from Fuuta's pov. The general premise is that Mikoto crashes his bike on his way to work, gets a concussion, has (non-John-related) memory issues, and Fuuta is compelled to look after him. I wanted a fun comparison of videogame restarts/second chances -- Fuuta says something rash and the conversation gets weird, until a few minutes later when Mikoto has a lapse in short term memory, and Fuuta gets to try the exact same situation again. By the end of the day, Fuuta is using the situation to very carefully test out compliments/confessions since there's no pressure it'll be remembered and he'll have to deal with the consequences. It's basically my timeloop fic without a timeloop 😂
The title was the first thing that popped into my head (as all my first working titles are) and comes from a story from my dad's childhood when he got a concussion and his short term memory kept resetting. He kept telling his family "You know, up until now it's been like a dream!" until his brother quoted it back to him and he went "how did you know I was gonna say that??" It started as a silly joke title, but Mikoto has the whole line about dreaming, so I'm keeping an eye out if there's a way I can actually work it into the fic !!
4 notes · View notes
o4o41 · 2 months ago
Text
it would have been good if Cindrella was more outspoken. And call out her family on not feeling **regretful and apologizing** after insults, ridicule and abuse.
#whose sense of fulfillment extends past her appearance#Disney princess 👸#They could have added hatemob in a form of their like-minded people like a choir#Straying away eye contact and narrowing eyes as if that person is hard to see(like they have a bad vision) and no one really telling to def#defend yourself even Fairy Godmother (who could be a project of Cindy's imagination who's also like thinks violence and insubordination#isn't an answer nor feminine)#You could add more realism to Cindrella like if you can't really stand up from home abuse what about abuse outside#Add hate mob that are the choir that would be perfectly even more realistic#And perhaps for a reinvention let her dad or fairy tell that you need to tell your abusers off tell them that choring is their job#And for the external abuse huz's mom tell you have to tell them off you have to attack(or smth of that) because by that you not only show#you can also answer-attack but you can do it twice 💪#Answer the bullies so they know you can do that not only that but doing it TWICE#And like imagine choring during your menstruation like wtf#Fuck them off you need to take care of yourself first#Cindrella a true story Cindrella grows awareness and a backbone#Cindrella and a choir hatemob#them be like “oh you need to look after my stuff and bag; oh sorry my bad that was actually my friend seat right here”#And tell her “if you don't behave nobody would love you” turn over to#“If they like me they just like me” “I don't need to turn into a downtrodden people-pleaser to be liked. That's fake” and#“good girls”go to hell#female socialization subversion#Strong Ella's#Tmnt#And not make abuse because of jealousy or smth because they've seen the behavior of#bringing violence into home and then not regretting and not apologizing#.Like the original poster have said “whose sense of fulfillment extends past her appearance or wedding plans”#That stepmother really tought that adopted daughter was a better option because other bio girls won't subordinate but really what's going o#is adopted one has turned into a standard house worker; specifically#a worker if not serving then beaten or insulted without regret or apology#And cindrella can be also called bruisisella
3 notes · View notes