#I mean I was super tomboyish and a pick me when I was younger but she respected that

[scottpilgrim4everr]

I really wish I was taught about self care when I was younger. I’m trying to make myself a list of self care things I might need. I can’t think of anything else other than just the essentials. Makes me worry I’m not doing it right because I don’t know anything about makeup or skin care. I don’t know how to “be a girl” properly.

[woso-dreamzzz]

Power

Katie McCabe x Reader

Summary: You and Katie both know who really holds the power

It was always funny to see the two of you together, going back as far as your childhood.

Katie had always been the more tomboyish of the pair of you, always up to wrestle with the older kids or go careening down the hill on her bike. You were slower in comparison, taking your time and amusing yourself by playing clapping games or making daisy chains.

You shouldn't have worked as well as you did but it must have been fate.

When Katie moved to England, you came with her. There was never any debate about it. Wherever she went, you went.

Football was her passion and you were happy to go along for the ride. She'd found a home at Arsenal and you were more than happy to tag along.

You worked at the local florist, surrounded by flowers everyday. You had beehives at the back of the garden. Your backyard was picture perfect and you grew your own fruits and vegetables.

No one expected someone like you to be engaged to someone like Katie.

"Mate," Leah said as she relaxed back in her seat," Your girl's a dream. I mean, what can't she do?"

Katie tilted her head back so she could peer into the kitchen where you were sectioning out the cake you'd made earlier.

It wasn't often that you two hosted bonding nights but, when you did, everyone came along. Your Pa was a chef so you'd picked up a few things along the way.

Your meals were the stuff of legend between the Arsenal team, with the experience being passed down from older teammates to younger ones as they all sat waiting for the invitation.

"Nothing," Katie replied as you momentarily got distracted by rearranging the bouquet that lived on the windowsill.

"You hit the jackpot," Jen said," I mean, I don't know how you control yourself. If I had a girl like that to come home to everyday, I'd never leave the bed."

"Hey!" Katie said, shoving her friend," She's my fiancée! Not yours!"

Jen laughed, tipping her head back. "I'm just saying! Come on, Katie, you can't say that you've never considered just skipping practice."

Katie winked. "I never said that. I just said to stop fantasising about my girl!"

"So you would stay in bed with her all the time?" Leah teased.

Katie smirked. "You know I would but you know," She shrugged," One of us has to be the breadwinner." She flexed jokingly. "I make enough that she could be my pretty housewife if she really wanted to."

"Real macho, McCabe," Leah said," You're forgetting we once saw you drop a weight on your foot. You're not that smooth."

"I think y/n would disagree with you there." Katie winked. "I'm super smooth. It's why she fell in love with me."

"She fell in love with you because you seduced her, I reckon. All this power is going to your head. Occasional Arsenal captain, Ireland captain and now you're saying you're the man of the house."

"I'm absolutely saying that." Katie flexed again. "I mean, check out these muscles."

"Alright," Jen laughed," Put those guns away before you take someone's eye out."

Admittedly, Katie knew she was talking like she was some kind of hormonal uni boy but she couldn't help herself. She was completely relaxed here, in her own home with her teammates scattered around and you serving everyone cake. She was definitely bigging herself up here but she didn't want to lose face in front of her friends, especially as you breezed back into the room with pre-sliced cake and a pile of plates.

"I hope you're all able to eat this," You said," I know you're meant to be on diets but, surely, you can cheat for the day."

Katie grinned, drunk on the feeling of puffed up pride at everyone's compliments about you. She stood and rested her hand a little too low on your ass to be decent in public.

"Course we can, babe," She said, emboldened by the way you didn't say anything as she squeezed lightly," Everyone loves your baking."

You sent her an unreadable look but allowed her touching, helping everyone get a slice before settling on her lap in the loveseat.

Katie smirked at Jen and Leah, who were sending her similar cocky looks, and she finally moved her hand from your ass to rest splayed out on your hip, dragging you ever closer.

You fed Katie bites of your own slice automatically as she sat manspread on the loveseat, still talking amongst her teammates.

When there was a lull in the conversation, you brought your lips to her ear.

"Vey macho, Katie," You said, watching her throat bob in horror when she realised that you had heard everything," A real man of the house."

"Babe," She murmured back, eyes darting back and forth between everyone to make sure none of them were looking," I-"

"I'm not going to say anything," You said, shutting her up by pressing another forkful of cake into her mouth," I wouldn't want to embarrass you in front of all of the new signings."

"Babe," She said again, shifting a bit uncomfortably as you put more food into her mouth.

"Shh," You said softly," Don't talk just yet." You leaned a bit closer, putting the plate down on your lap so you had a hand free to push Katie's hand to grip your hip harder. "You have your fun showing off for your friends. You do whatever you want but let me make this clear. If you have to be reminded who's really in charge here then I will make sure to remind you. Understand?"

"I understand."

"Good." You smiled and drew away, picking up the plate and nudging Katie's lips with a cake filled fork again. "Open up, baby. I spent a lot of time on this. Make sure to eat your fill."

[hollyzone]

LGBT+ History Month - a playlist

(Something I wrote for work about LGBT+ History Month which I thought I could also share here. The theme was write about a short playlist of songs which means something to you as an LGBTQ+ person.)

For LGBT+ History Month I’ve picked songs which track the evolution of openness in the lyrics of LGBT”+ artists over my own music-listening life. When I first started getting into music it was the mid 1990s and Britpop, alt rock and cheesy 90s dance were my thing, along with the Spice Girls cos obviously, I was a young girl. Back then, few were the LGBTQ+ artists who were overt in their lyrics. Even the ones who were out would lean heavily on the second person pronouns in their songs or sing about something which wasn’t straightforward romantic stuff.

Even when I started uni in 2003, the slight increase in out queer musicians hadn’t translated to quite so much lyrical obviousness. It’s telling that a lot of the romantic songs I identified with lyrically when I was younger were written by straight men, because at least they were about women.

I also got really really good at sussing out when a female musician was queer before they had confirmed it. Clues like never using third person pronouns, the adjectives they picked when singing about someone in the second person, and the visual imagery were the things I picked over as I sought out representation which wasn’t k.d. lang (no shade on k.d. but I am not a country fan).

For my playlist I have picked five songs which track this evolution over the course of the c21st so far. From the subtle to the outrageous, the low key hints to the big declaration of queerness.

1.       The Organ – ‘Love Love Love’ (2004)

The Organ jangled and cried for just one album, a tenure so brief that I didn’t even get to see them live (I made it to within 24 hours of seeing them at Leeds Festival but they cancelled and were replaced with The View, in one of music’s greatest crimes). They sounded like a female Smiths, right down to Katie Sketch’s mournful vocals, and they appeared in an episode of The L Word. And yet, the year was 2004 and so there’s not a sign of “she” or “her” in their short, melancholic album. There are songs about men but none sound romantic. There are songs about love but none sound happy. Sketch moved on to run a lesbian bar in Toronto. We all knew and yet to this day their Wikipedia page doesn’t even have the ‘LGBT musician’ tag.

Sample lyrics: “Oh love, love, I’d really like a small part of that, Oh love, I can’t believe the word love.”

2.       Ladyhawke – ‘Manipulating Woman’ (2008)

There is a track on super-shy, Kiwi indie musician Ladyhawke (real name Pip Brown) called ‘Manipulating Woman’ which managed to perfectly describe a real-life lesbian drama which erupted in my friendship circle around the time it came out. There were other clues about Ladyhawke’s sexuality – the tomboyish style, the use of second person pronouns in all her love songs – but it was the way ‘Manipulating Woman’ captured the exhausting drama of having to keep a toxic person in your friendship group because the pool of queer friends isn’t huge and it felt back in 2008 that you had to put up with these rotten apples as a price of not being ejected from the queer in-group. Luckily today it’s easier to find groups of queer people to share actual interests with.

Sample lyrics: “You're so completely twisted, you're so completely evil, you're so completely wrong, but here I am still stuck with you with you.”

3.       Austra – ‘Young And Gay’ (2011)

Did the mood change with the decade? It certainly felt by the 2010s that queer female musicians were more comfortable with being out once they were established, but there were definitely some who seemed to be holding back their exact sexual identity just to be sure. And then there was Canadian synthpop group Austra, who put out a debut EP with a track called ‘Young And Gay’. The lyrics are rather abstract, to the point where they didn’t need to call it anything queer. But they did, they were upfront and direct, singer Katie Stelmanis talking openly about being a lesbian from her very first interviews. Personally, I found it delightful, throwing sexual identity out there and being direct because why not?

Sample lyrics: “In my head, the fool in you will know.”

4.       Christine and the Queens – ‘Tilted’ (2016)

If the 2000s were a pathway to queer female artists feeling like they could loudly proclaim that they were attracted to women without backlash from (open-minded and decent) music lovers, then the 2010s have seen more and more queer female artists opening up to lyrically challenging stereotypes about what women are like. For me, being queer doesn’t just mean I like women, I am also a gender non-conforming cis woman, I have grown from the diddy tomboy of my earliest years into someone who just doesn’t play well with gender norms while also feeling 100% female (and totally respecting those who reject the gender binary). Hence my unending love for Christine’s ‘Tilted’ which isn’t just about queer love but about queer identity and living in your queer skin. Also dancing. It’s about dancing. Very important.

Sample lyrics: “But I’m actually good, can’t help it if we’re tilted.”

5.       Anna Calvi – ‘Chain’ (2018) + Janelle Monae – ‘PYNK’ (2018)

Cheating slightly by having two songs, but these illustrate the same point beautifully. Both Anna Calvi and Janelle Monae were, by 2018, big names with several albums under their belts and mainstream followings. Both had distinctively queer stylings (Calvi’s masculine flamenco attire, Monae’s suits) and honestly, I had, correctly, assumed both were queer from the first time I saw them. Over the decade, they had both gone from slightly coded queerness, lyrical references with just enough plausible deniability, and a tendency not to talk about their personal lives, to being very VERY queer. When they released two of 2018’s best albums (Hunter and Dirty Computer) they were also releasing two of its queerest. Both records glorious. Both contain moment after moment which resonate with me. And both are incredibly hard to quote from in a safe-for-work way!

Sample lyrics: ‘Chains’ – “I’ll be the boy, you be the girl, I’ll be the girl, you be the boy” + ‘PYNK’ – “Pynk behind all of the doors, crazy!”

[goron-king-darunia]

Tagged (by vague gesture of “if you wanna do it, TAG!”) by @biophilie like, 2 years ago, so I’m finally doing it. Rules: Choose any three fandoms and answer the questions, then tag 10 people you want to know better.

My Three Fandoms: Legend of Zelda, Tales of Symphonia DotNW, and One Piece since those 3 have taken up big chunks of my attention over the years. Would do Darkwood since it’s a current interest but since there are so few characters, it would make the meme here harder so... Darkwood will have to wait.

The first character you loved: LoZ: I was a slut for Link as a kid, TBF I liked most protagonists, but I liked Link a LOT. DotNW: I actually liked Ratatosk a lot at first because he was cool and mysterious and tough! My first impulse was really liking Richter’s design but the first character I loved/really liked based on gameplay and actual characterization was Ratatosk. One Piece: I really liked Red Haired Shanks and was sad when he didn’t really show up again for a LONG time.

The character you never expected to love so much: Loz: There’s a few so I’m gonna cheat a bit. In OoT and MM, Ruto and Skull Kid were just kind of characters that existed but I didn’t like much. Didn’t actively dislike them but didn’t really bother taking an interest in them. But I like them a lot more now, especially with how they’re characterized in ��non-canon” material like the Manga and Hyrule Warriors. The only other character I can recall from the game series that I was surprised that I liked was Peatrice from Skyward Sword. At first it was just like “Oh, yeah, she’s just the girl who stores your items, whatever. She’s neat I guess.” But then she started changing. She got more cheerful when Link came around more and showed an interest in him and when she asked if he liked her I just couldn’t say no! And then she just became so obnoxiously bubbly and happy about it and I LOVED THAT SO MUCH. Unironically I ship Peatrice and SS Link because, like, Link and Zelda are great friends but they don’t interact much since Link has to try to save her and Zelda has goddess things to worry about. Peatrice is just always there and unlike Zelda who already has a good rapport with Link at the start of the game, you get to SEE Peatrice warming up to him and I am SO soft for that! SO SOFT! Actually, one more also from SS. Groose. He’s an obnoxious, selfish, gloating bastard man, but by the end of the game with all the changes he went through, he totally grew on me as a cool dude. Especially with how he and Impa got along.  DotNW: Slight cheat here too since the character didn’t debut in the game but... Colette. I honestly didn’t like her that much in Symphonia. I just kind of viewed her as an object that motivated Lloyd for a while and the impetus for everything happening in the game and it wasn’t until the end of Symphonia that I really started thinking of her as more than just a ditz that Lloyd happens to like. I’m not really sure when it happened but I started really appreciating her after DotNW, and not really because of anything she did. I guess I just eventually noticed a lot of her finer points and all the ways she contributed and how her kindness is actually super refreshing and hopeful and how soft that is considering what she’d gone through. See also my next point on Nami because hooo boy I was kind of a shitlord kid and needed to get through some things... One Piece: Nami. I HAAAATED her when I was young. Partially because of internalized sexism (probably shit I learned from sexist media, my dad, and just the lack of trust I had for any girl that wasn’t my friend because of massive bullying as a kid, but I digress.) and partially because one of the biggest parts of Nami’s arc early on was her utter betrayal of the crew. Like, we find out WHY later, and obviously I TOTALLY get where she was coming from now and all but as a kid that was just UNCALLED FOR. I also HEAVILY viewed her as the “no fun allowed” type that was actively impeding my new fave, Luffy, from having all the fun he could want because that shit costs money and the money is HERS. As a broke Millenial, I now 10000000% get where Nami is coming from and her financial responsibility is honestly hella impressive because she absolutely DOES NOT withhold the treasure from the rest of the crew, she fucking BUDGETS it. In general, I tended to dislike a lot of leading females for being catty or killjoys or a lot of other things when honestly, they were just being completely normal humans. Glad I grew out of that shit because while Nami still isn’t my fave, she’s fucking amazing.

The character you relate to the most: Loz: It’s changed over the years. I relate to Ruto a lot more now because yo, I would also just fuck off into the gut of my people’s patron Deity if my dad was being a pain and trying to marry me off (okay, so this is Manga exclusive, sue me) and 10/10 would give a precious family heirloom to a cute boy that rescued me. But more than that, IDK, she’s just... a lil’ spoiled but in a cute way, a lil’ tomboyish, but overall, for a Princess, she’s just kind of doing her thing, she’s responsible when it matters. But for OoT, y’all KNOW Darunia is my patronus because DAYUM. Chunky but strong (I’m a wuss but shut up), Grumpy butt but cares about his people, actually totes a fun dude when he’s not stressed about a food crisis, says “fuck you” directly to a fucking evil asshole despite the consequences, treats a fucking 11 year old kid like a full human being (I do not agree with leveraging a kid to fucking fight a dragon but... Link could handle it so...) names his own kid after Link because why the fuck not, befriends anyone that does him a favor and treats them like family. Dude’s just got chill old man vibes and I dig that shit. 10/10 relate to just being a fat dude that is grumpy but also wants to befriend everyone. HOWEVER, I think my top tier relatable character is Midna from Twilight Princess because that bitch is just me. Cursed to be a hot bitch trapped in a cute chunky body (I am working on myself. XD) 10/10 spoiled and bitchy as fuck, cheeky lil’ asshole who’s actually very sweet, think’s Link is dumb but also cute, cares about her world but ALSO cares about Link’s world, a lil’ selfish but also HELLA selfless because she cared more about Link and Zelda than her own life and cared more about her people than her own safety because she just fucking WENT TO FIX THAT SHIT when Zant started causing trouble, even though she didn’t have to. She’s everything I am or aspire to be. 10/10 one of the best Zelda characters. DotNW: Hard to say. I identify a lot with aspects of Richter, Aster, and Emil. I don’t have a lot of self confidence and am a bit of a shy bean, lil’ grumpy, but also a complete goober and an idealist, 10/10 would walk into hell for someone I love without thinking twice and would make deals with demons to try to save someone I care about because I am a dumbass. I love the DotNW boys because the DotNW boys are me. One Piece: Chopper. I just really fucking vibe with the whole “nobody likes me EXCEPT HOLY SHIT SOME PEOPLE SOMEHOW LIKE ME, WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO TO DESERVE THAT?” thing he has going on, as well as the whole glutton for praise but telling people to shut up when they praise me thing he has. I for real wanted to be a doctor when I was younger BECAUSE of Chopper. I’m just a weird little bean that doesn’t fit in anywhere very well while also being a slut for praise and wanting to take care of others and help them because other people have cared for me. Low key also vibe with Usopp because dude absolutely gels with kids, is a huge fucking wuss but deals with it anyway, will literally fight someone over petty shit and then come back and fight side by side with his bud’s again.

The character you’d slap: LoZ: Mmmmm. Hard to say. Like, obvs the villains but IDK who else I’d really want to slap? Does it count if I want to slap Anjuu/the Cucco Lady but, like... gentle and on the butt and in a sexy way? IDK, man. I’d feel bad but maybe Slap Mido? He looks like a kid so I’d feel REALLY bad for it, but aren’t Kokiri literally just kids forever? Asshole could be 100 years old, man... Either way he’s kinda a brat. 10/10 would slap early-game Groose from Skyward Sword also, but I’d feel bad about it because he ends up being a decen guy later. Also would slap Ghirahim for being both sexy and evil. DotNW: Alice for deciding that “never being weak again” means treating everyone else like garbage, even though I 1000% get where she’s coming from. Richter for being a fucking dumbass and not asking for help and deciding that demons were a good option and manipulating a child older dude with a magic core was a great idea even though I would do the exact same thing in his shoes. Ratatosk for being a murderous prick and starting the whole thing even though I absolutely understand where he’s coming from and I would also probably accidentally smite someone if I was a fucking spirit and in a shit mood because the only thing I really cared about was fucking ripped away from me. Honestly, mostly just me slapping people that remind me of me for doing exactly what I would do. Sensible me slapping actual me because actual me is a fucking dumbass emotional bitch with violent tendencies. One Piece: The fucking villains, obviously, Dr. Hililuck/Hiriluck for being a fucking bastard in the manga, holy shit was he an asshole! And also FUCKING SANJI. Jesus fuck, I am not over the pervy shit he does, what a creep.

Three favourite characters (in order of preference): LoZ: This is gonna be REAL hard because I love a lot of characters so... Midna, Link, and Darunia? It’s hard man. I love a lot of characters SO MUCH and it’s really hard to pick faves! DotNW: Richter, Emil, Aster. Emil and Aster share the same level of favoritism, but Richter is my number one. One Piece: Chopper, Zoro, Luffy. I used to like Luffy way more than I do now, but he’s still a fucking dork and I still like him tons.

A character you liked at first but don’t anymore: LoZ: I can’t really think of any, but I guess the character I waffle on a bit is Malon. Sometimes she’s like “Heck yeah! FAVE!” and sometimes I’m like “Eh, she exists...” IDK, I really like most of the characters. DotNW: I used to like Zelos a lot, but not anymore. Yeah this is kinda cheating since he ALSO didn’t debut in DotNW, but he’s in it so... TBF I like him in DotNW BETTER than in the first Symphonia, but not as much as I used to like him overall. One Piece: Fucking Sanji. I used to like him before the creepy factor set in. What really hit home for me was the Thriller Bark arc where he outright says he wanted the power of invisibility to creep on girls. Fucking nasty. The womanizing thing was just a quirk before that. I don’t think I’m ever gonna be over it. So gross and creepy now knowing he actively thought about creeping on girls using a special power. I know guys say this is a common thing and just how dudes are but no. That’s fucking sick. It’s one thing to say “yeah, I want to oggle women because tiddies are sexy” or whatever. It’s another thing to say “I WANT TO SPY ON WOMEN WITHOUT THEM KNOWING SO I CAN SEE TIDDY.” and it’s a third thing to say that IN A WORLD WHERE IT IS PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE TO BE INVISIBLE that you WOULD USE THAT POWER TO STARE AT WOMEN WITHOUT THEM KNOWING.

Three otps: LoZ: Link and basically everyone, but let’s narrow that. Link and Zelda is a classic, Link and Ruto is a guilty pleasure, Link and Peatrice is the underdog ship that I dig a lot. DotNW: Every combo of Richter, Emil, and Aster, enough said. One Piece: Luffy and food because he’s Ace, just let him fucking eat. Zoro and whoever he ends up liking. Tashigi maybe. Chopper and Milky.

Tagging: Anyone that wants to do it~