#I love this being asked of me when I literally am a garbage person and this blog is my garbage can

[emo-trash101]

Hello dearie!

How's your day?

Yes,yes,I'm back already,I know!

It's just that I just love your writing,and you said that you'd let me ask whenever so,here I am!

You already know me,so let's just get to the ask!

May I have any Hazbin hotel character (only Hazbin,but any character you want to write for! Only preference is Alastor- If you could write multiple that'd be great,but that's up to you,honey!) with a Platonic!GN!Friend!Reader that gets talked a lot behind their back (maybe by fake friends or just random people),but they know about it,and when the characters ask about it,they just say "It doesn't matter" or something along those lines? Would they stop the people talking behind their backs? Would they get angry? That's up to you!

That's all for me! I hope you enjoy writing this as much as my last one!!

Stay proud, don't forget to take care of yourself!!

-Nina <33

OMG YIPPEE YOUR BACKK!!! You can always spend time in my requests, because I love writing them! But definitely, and I absolutely love this concept!

Angel Dust, Alastor, and Lucifer x Bullied! Reader

!Platonic relationship!

Pronouns: Second person, gender neutral

Tw: Shitty friends, Alastor in general

Angel Dust -

- This man gets it to absolutely no degree.

- Like he absolutely has had friends who were untrustworthy and just garbage human beings.

- That being said, this would likely become a conversation after you get him to hang out with your other group of friends. Y'all probably clubbing or going to a bar.

- After awhile you go to use the restroom which leaves him with your garbage other friends.

- Then they start talking to him, trying to get him to agree that you're annoying and whatever other bullshit they try to spout.

- Angel (being the loyal puppy he is) immediately starts to tear your friends a new one for being such asshats. He continues yelling at them until you get out of the bathroom.

- He immediately starts telling you what they said, still glaring at them aggressively. And he is hardcore shocked when you just respond with "It's fine"

- Cause like bitch, no it's not.

- He is definitely very appalled, and ends up dragging you out of there and giving you a slightly aggressive pep talk on your self worth and being worth more than shitty friends.

- in all, he tries to love and support you, but sometimes he's really sure you were dropped on your head as a baby.

Alastor -

- I am being as honest as possible when I say this man most likely has no experience when it comes to this.

- Like he deals with annoying assholes by just plain killing them. There, problem solved.

- You probably brought your friends to the hotel to try and introduce them to everyone, and during this time they seemed sweet as peach cobbler. But Alastor definitely picked up on their hidden intentions.

- After you walk away (Charlie definitely dragged you away to help with something), he sneaks up on them and makes them his newest addition to his radio station. After all, he can't be having people hurting his little pet (I swear this man is a literal red flag, run.)

- When you return he doesn't even really mention it to you, he just tells you your friends "Went home early"

- Safe to say you never saw those friends again.

- In all, probably the most efficient when it came to his approach.

Lucifer -

- As I mentioned in a previous post, Lucifer is definitely a people pleaser. He tries to constantly help people and make excuses for them.

- However, when he sees his loved ones (*cough* you *cough*) being used it's another situation entirely.

- He most likely meets your friends by accident, just walking through the streets of hell with you when you run into them (spending time without you).

- Y'all actually have a really good conversation before you realize you forgot something in the last store you were in and run to go grab it.

- After you leave one of your friends makes a really ill intended joke about you being forgetful, and lets just say that Lucifer did not take that kindly.

- He immediately yells at them for a good couple of minutes, and then leaves to go find you after deciding they were not worth anyone's time.

- He brings up their comments to you and after you just brush them off he doesn't get mad per-say, just really sad that it's happened so much it doesn't even affect you.

- In all, he tries to just keep you busy and away from them as much as possible, because at least you have someone who thinks you're amazing.

This was really relatable while I was writing it, and I just wanted to say if any of y'all are being treated like this by anyone just cut them off. They are not worth your energy and time.

[mrs-monaghan]

Hello Shaz

I would love to hear your opinion on 3D and all the talk around it

My thoughts on the talk around it is; "wow, well this is a load of garbage" (no offence to any friends I may have who don't like the song I just disagree that its a terrible song)

Alright. 3D. Let's talk. My thoughts. First, what's with the fucking homeless trousers??

I hate rich people 😭😭😭😭 if I wear this people will wonder why I didn't go back home to change after I fell in mud 😪

Anyhu, before i even say a thing. We should probably all try to remember that JK said this

(Thanks @chicknbunny13)

Yeah sure, even if he doesn't write a song, he may resonate with it. But not everything he does is a reflection of his actual life. This one, is for the Jikook antis btw. This is why my anons are still off. People, I dont have the energy for antis rn. JK sang 'girl' so what? This topic is super old and tired and consider it officially retired from this blog. I'm sooooo over it 🥱🥱🥱🥱

Now that we have that out of the way let's tackle the fact that our JK is a grown, grown adult. I don't need to bring back the live where he told people he's an adult and he is almost 30 and he will do what he wants to do. And if he wants to sing about this, that's exactly what he will sing about.

Oh my,

Even Jimin knows all about it

Tweet

BAHAHAAHAHAHA!!!

Let is be known i am choosing to take that sentence literally. I think JK just means him, the girl, with champagne and confetti. I really don't think it means anything else here. But, seeing as this is another sex song, I won't put it past him.

Anyone else notice a recurring theme here?

Okay then. 😳

Also shout out to this random kid with the horse

I can't be the only one who has no clue what his point was 😂😂😂

While we are on the champagne topic,

I mean....

Make no mistake, SEVEN and 3D are singing about the same thing. If SEVEN was in your face, 3D is subtle. But they are both just talking about sex here. Which is why it doesn't make sense to me why people are so upset??? As a person who likes Harlow and has heard his songs before, this did not shock me one bit. There is nothing wrong with this song. It is meaningless and shallow but guess what, thats the type of music the GP is listening to rn. I understand why Asians have an issue with this line

And I can respect that. I don't have to understand it, but if Asians say its offensive, then its offensive. In which case I think that's just ignorance on Harlow's part. The people behind the song and JK himself are not going to okay something degrading. So it is of my opinion that people are reading too much, way too much into something that aint even meant to be deep.

It's a song, about sex. The only thing deep about it, is the holes that will be getting penetrated.

This song doesn't require to be analysed. Okay, maybe when trying to decipher the analogies being used but that's it. JK has one agenda and one agenda only; release music that the general public will devour, get his name out there and be a huge pop star. And it is working.

Cue Boracity's new video about each member and who their target audience are for each solo project

JK did not write these songs. If he did I'm sure they would have more meaning. But that's not what he's aiming for rn. Right now the man just wants to put out something that he knows will sell. Wants to put out something that will be a hit. And 3D is exactly that. Just like SEVEN. Mans was asked for the meaning of the song and by his answer, I'm not sure even he knows.

What??

Did anyone understand that???? If you did, break it down for me coz I did NOT understand that 😂😂

This song has no meaning. Its shallow, catchy, easy to remember and move to. Enough with trying to complicate shit! It ain't that deep. Period.

JK cared more about the choreo.

While Jack is calling himself a whore for wanting 4 women, JK is busy dancing throughout. So I will listen to JK and enjoy the song and choreo. Because there is nothing in the lyrics and there was never intended to be.

Idk why y'all mad when we stan a consent king:

Personally I dont have time to be angry because 1) i see no reason to be, and 2) i am too busy admiring JK's body proportions 🤤🤤

Damn, Jimin's man is hot!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[miasmaghoul]

As a resident Dew lover I am here for your Dew NSFW headcanons if you please <3

>:)

Switch, but usually bottoms. Topping is fun, but it tends to make him finish too soon. Doesn't play dom often, but enjoys every moment of it when he does.

Despite this, though, he never bottoms for his first time with someone.

Little dick, most of the others can fit the whole thing in their mouths with no trouble. Including his pudgy little knot.

Entirely too weak to having his neck and ears kissed/licked/otherwise mouthed at.

Obsessed with nipple play. OBSESSED.

Biter. Enough to draw blood, and he loves that too.

Loves marking and being marked. Wants evidence of every encounter, even if that sometimes means Swiss bruising his ass to the point where he can't sit for a few days.

L O V E S feeling shame and humiliation. Loves being broken down and treated like garbage.

Blames everyone else for his kinks ("Swiss made me like piss!" "Rain dressed me like a girl and now I'm into it!" "Mountain gave me a thing for feet!")

Massive size difference kink, likes feeling tiny despite how much he bitches about his height.

Speaking of, ELITE SIZE QUEEN.

The only one to have taken Mountain's knot (not counting Rain's jaw trick), and to regularly request DP. He loves being overwhelmed.

Bratty tendencies, but I don't personally hc him as whiny and obnoxious about it.

Mommy and daddy kinks

Edging forever and always. Also overstim. He likes to pretend he's had enough, but it's never enough.

Up for any position, but generally prefers being on all fours or bent over something. Eye contact is hard for him - Swiss likes to force it, but Aether gets as much as he likes.

Lost his "virginity" to Aether and developed A Thing about it.

Has different dynamics with everyone, very few people see the same side of Dew behind closed doors.

Don't tell anyone, but he would do literally anything Aether asked of him. The others all have points at which he bows out, but Aether? Dew can never say no to him.

VERY into dubcon. He likes to struggle, to feel scared and trapped. Adores when one of the others will let him give them the same treatment.

Breeding kink. BREEDING KINK.

Loves to choke, not super into being choked. Makes him nervous, and not in the way he likes. A hand on the throat to threaten or be possessive is fine, but he can do without the pressure.

Loves feeling used and objectified. The others play rock, paper, scissors on hotel nights when they're touring to see who gets Dew rights for the night. He grumbles about it, but always ends up chubby when someone argues that they want him instead. Like he's not even there.

If you pull his hair right when he's about to cum he screams. Every time.

[sephirthoughts]

Sorry if this is a lot but I am consumed by Cidvin at all times, so for the ask game for Cid/Vincent could you do 7, 22, 31, 32? Or any of them really! (I am obsessed with the way you talk about these two) Cheers!

7. Cid is clumsier. This is not his fault it’s just that Vincent has literal superhuman physical abilities. He makes up for it by being extremely confident though. Which makes him seem a lot cooler while he’s tumbling down two flights of stairs into a pile of garbage cans.

22. i was going to say Vincent’s would probably be physical touch but that’s more soothing/grounding. i think his actual love language would be acts of service. quietly, persistently, creating a bubble of care around his person. like making sure whenever cid absentmindedly reaches for his coffee mug it’s full and hot. the ash trays are neatly emptied no matter how much he smokes. his slippers are always near to hand. the enemies that have surrounded the place are all quickly, silently slaughtered and disposed of before they can disturb cid’s peace. that kind of thing.

Cid’s would be quality time. lest we forget, he’s a literal rocket scientist which means he goes fucking hard when it comes to work. when he specifically makes time for a person, he’s telling them “you’re more important to me than my work/lifelong obsession.” that said, he would drop absolutely everything for vincent at any time. not even in an emergency. if vincent was just like…bored and wanted to see him.

31. They spend their anniversaries just relaxing together, having a lot of sexy time, cooking a nice meal, exchanging small gifts. appreciating the time they have together while not calling too much attention to the actual number of years passing, because cid knows how difficult that is for vincent.

and late at night, after cid is asleep, vincent lays there staring at him for hours, memorising his features like snapshots in time, counting the grey hairs that he’s getting more and more of every year, as gold turns gradually to silver. quietly preparing himself for the long, cold night that will come, after this brilliant sun sets from his life, and he’s left alone and bereft, to face what it truly means to have loved and lost. to pay the bitter price that fate demands for having possessed such perfect joy. then he wraps cid up in his arms and whispers “it’s worth it” before he drifts off to sleep.

32. i answered this one before but i feel it’s incumbent upon me to emphasize how much of a sticky octopus vincent is. like he only begrudgingly lets go so cid can use the bathroom. and beware of his fangs because he claims he’s not a vampire, but if he feels ignored he will bite in and hang on until he draws blood or is sufficiently petted.

[they-lived]

20 questions for writers

@theblueeyedfirebender THANKS FOR THE TAG FRIEND I LOVE YOU LOTS 💙💛💙💛💙💛

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

41! (And an additional 37 on ffn ��� for a total of 78 just cause I was curious what 11 years of a hobby produces)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

782,267… holy crap 😅

3. What fandoms do you write for?

On my page you’ll find fics for Dragon Age (2 fics), Resident Evil (3 fics), Baldur’s Gate (2 fics), Until Dawn (2 fics), Critical Role (1 fic), Fullmetal Alchemist (6 fics), and Yuri on Ice (25 fics)!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Bloom in the Dark (Yuri on Ice)

Сонечко - Sunshine (Yuri on Ice)

What I Wouldn’t Do (Yuri on Ice)

Truth (Yuri on Ice)

Four Hidden Talents of Yuri P (And His Hidden Achilles Heel) (Yuri on Ice)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I used to not respond because on ffn you pretty much had to dm people to do so which felt weird (especially because I was 11-17 on there and did not want anyone knowing that fact even tho it was pretty obvious in hindsight) but now I respond to almost every comment I get! Fandom is a shared experience and I want to communicate more!!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Lessons I Learned From Loving You Alone (Dragon Age) ~ Loghain’s wife had a really tragic life in my brain and I leaned in HARD

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I almost always do angst with a happy ending but I think the happiest is a toss up between Сонечко or As The World Begins to End (which is my resident evil meets pride prejudice and zombies mash up)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I wouldn’t call it hate necessarily but weirdly I get a lot of discourse around Yuri P being Ukrainian but like… I have always written him this way and I always will lol. It’s a part of my brand at this point. For the most part they’re pretty tame comments tho

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yep! Most of the time I use sex as a way for characters to express their indescribable inexplicable connection or just to explore a couple in their most intimate moments. I love smut with funnies too so I try to throw that in there… also yes I do write porn without plot just because I want to lol.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Not really. Closest I got to was As the World Begins to End, which is Resident Evil in a similar world as Pride Prejudice and Zombies, but the zombies and lore were still RE based. It was more inspired by than anything else.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Back in the day someone wrote a fic “based on” one of mine but they just changed the names and nothing else. I still laugh about it because like… what an odd thing to do.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yup! Into Portuguese, Japanese, and Russian! It was very cool and they were so nice!!!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope but I’d be down!

14. What is your all-time favorite ship?

Don’t ask me that my stomach hurts (it’s probably Everlark or Jasper or Otayuri or Royai don’t make me choose~)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I never say never but golly it’s been hard to keep writing I Will Carry You idk why I really lost steam on it. I also have a fic I’m literally 25 pages deep into that was supposed to be a bit fic that I have not posted but WANT TO FINISH SO BAD

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I’m super good at eliciting the specific niche emotion I’m looking to express and hitting the exact topic I want to address. When I want something to be heightened and funny I nail it, when I want something to be bone deep nostalgia I’ve got it. That part is really fun for me personally.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I. Hate. Describing. Scenes. And. Action! My theater of the mind is pretty garbage so when I have to exposit what something looks like I cannot for the life of me enjoy it. My brain shuts off and on autopilot I go.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Even though I am bilingual I still get nervous doing this. Mostly because I’m smol and embarrassed but also because I really have to decide what the purpose is. I love having multilingual characters I grew up on the border between the us and Mexico and I have constantly been surrounded by multilingualism and generally think it’s dope. But I prefer to write the dialog in italics if it’s in another language so my audience can immediately understand what’s going on and have the full picture. If I don’t want them to know what’s being said I simply gloss over it lol

19. First fandom you wrote for?

*Glances wearily at my self insert Harry Potter fic I wrote when I was 12 and had the audacity to post on ffn* … uh… Hunger Games

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Changes by the day honestly but the top 5 are as follows in no particular order:

- As the World Begins to End (p&p will ALWAYS take me out you guys)

- Сонечко (the way I trauma dumped in this one is still so raw and so relevant. The fact that family and love really does win OUCH)

- An Ode to the Daughters of Darkness (first and only attempt at a more poetic style and some of it really holds up)

- Idioms and Idiots (idk I feel like I could turn this into a whole novel it’s wholesome and funny I smile the whole time I’m reading it I love her)

- Long May You Reign (I have reread this bitch so many times since she’s been posted I love the chaos the funnies and the feels. Idk man I just have an insatiable craving for Royai to be parents and this makes me laugh while writing it)

Tagging @masterdisastre @lou-is-lurking @kaleidodreams @weeheilandcoo and anyone else who wants to ✨✨✨✨

[jerktournament]

ROUND ONE - Byakuya Togami (Danganronpa) VS Yesod (Lobotomy Corporation/Library of Ruina)

(The contestant image for Yesod is from Lobotomy Corporation, but this entry is for both renditions of the character.)

!!! PROPAGANDA BELOW !!!

BYAKUYA: "- His title is literally, get this, "ultimate affluent progeny" - Fucking look at him /hj - Treats everyone as inferior in every way, even when they're trying to solve a murder he goes "how did YOUUU figure this out before MEEE???? >:0" - Constantly has an "Me vs. Them" mentality about everything so he feels the need to prove himself to be superior - Messes with crime scenes because it would "make them more interesting" (purposefully incriminating someone else, who he didn't like) Actual quotes by him - "I'm only here to get breakfast. I have neither need nor desire to talk to you. Now withdraw." - "You're like a child lost in the woods, you know that? A total waste of space." - "You know, I still just can't believe it... That an uneducated, brain-dead, useless piece of garbage like you has survived this long." - "You have only yourself to blame—you came to me with your tragic little story. I didn't ask you to. This is the real world, not some romantic fantasy fairytale.""

YESOD: "AAHGH HOW DO I EVEN BEGIN TTHERE'S JUST. yesod. probably spoilers here but when you first meet him in Lobotomy Corporation I think one of the earliest things he does is make a jab at your fashion sense even though it's universally agreed by new players that his outfit is a disaster (although he dresses like that for fear of contamination and his Trauma!). He's cold to mostly everyone and is very strict, rules-following kind of guy, and people often see him as emotionless and heartless, coming up with the nickname "The Viper" for him as a result of that! BUT!!! BUT!!!! LISTEN EVEN IF HE'S MEAN. EVEN IF HE'S COLD. HE'S LIKE THIS BECAUSE HE HAS TO BE!!! He has so much unresolved trauma in his past of getting too close with am employee and befriending them and losing them because he wasn't strict enough on safety regulations and let them off with a pass because they were friends. AND NOW HE'S CLOSED AND WITHDRAWN AND OBSESSIVE OVER SAFETY PROTOCOL BECAUSE HE'S SCARED AND HE REALLY REALLY DOES CARE ABOUT HIS EMPLOYEES!!! It's hinted that he doesn't like the nickname Viper but he accepts it because it makes him out to be the respected person he wants to be!!!! He praises the real AI of the corporation, Angela, for being cold and emotionless(which is ANOTHER bag of repressed trauma worms) and wishes he could feel nothing like her because HE FEELS TOO MUCH!!! I LOVE HIM SO DEARLY MI AMOR!!! And AND in the second game he's healed a little bit and is still a little mean but the first thing he does THE VERY FIRST THING HE DOES to the protagonist is walk up to him wordlessly and reach up to fix his tie. I'm normal about him. Also he's short. Short people closer to hell or whatever. IDK he's purple ok? :3 Even if he loses IT'S A TESTAMENT TO HIS GROWTH I'M PROUD OF YOU YESOD!!!!!!"

[legolasghosty]

So. About a year ago, the lovely Innytoes created a list of spicy writing prompts. And I, being the dorky ace that I am, decided to take it as a personal challenge to see just how UN-spicy I could do some of said prompts. The actual giving of prompts was kept to a few friends, and it was mostly a silly thing back when I could actually sit down and spin up a one shot in an evening. (A few of said prompts actually made it to ao3 at various points, you can read them here, here, here, and here!)

HOWEVER, I took a couple of the prompts off of the list before I offered it to my friends for prompts. Mostly cause I just had no idea how to make said prompts not sexual. But one of them has continued to haunt me for over a frigging year now! SO, here's some little snippets of how one could de-saucy-ify the prompt, "The lube is what flavor?"

Option 1 -

"Okay so what am I supposed to be getting again?" Alex asked, the phone to his ear as he entered the O'Reillys.

He heard Bobby groan on the other end of the call. "We've been over this at least five times, Lex." Alex could feel his exasperated glare without even seeing him.

"I'm sorry," Alex sighed. "I just know literally nothing about car fluids. Blame the gay in me or whatever."

"You do realize I'm gay too, right?" Bobby pointed out. "But again, you're looking for silicon lubricant. And for the love of God, don't get that Red and Tacky garbage Chad 'recommended'."

"I'm sorry, the lube is what flavor?!" Alex demanded, turning onto the aisle marked 'Fluids'.

"You're not supposed to-whatever-just get the silicon stuff," Bobby said instead of answering. "Valvoline usually works just fine."

Alex glanced around at the overwhelming shelves of bottles and jugs. He drummed out the beat to a song Luke and Julie had shown them the day before on his leg as he narrowed down the options. There, that looked right.

"Okay I found it," he told Bobby. "But you're explaining how car lube can be 'red and tacky' to me later."

"Deal," Bobby responded, sounding relieved.

Option 2 -

"-and the vocal folds need to be kept moist," Julie explained.

Luke nodded, but Julie knew she was losing him. His vocal health notes had dissolved into scribbles and half-finished lyrics. She'd better wrap this up.

"So they're naturally lubricated with a really thin layer of mucus," she continued. "And in order to keep that layer thin and stuff, you have to stay properly hydrated."

She paused to pick up the light blue plastic water bottle from the studio floor. But when she looked back up to whack him with it, the mostly full container seeming like a decent way to make a point, he was already staring at her, eyes full of confusion.

"What?" Julie asked, one hand flying automatically up to her ponytail to see if it had come loose or something.

"The lube is what flavor?" Luke asked, mouth hanging open a bit.

"I-what?" Julie asked again, now feeling almost as confused as her bandmate looked.

"The voice cord lube stuff," Luke responded. "You said it's like mucus. But isn't that just... snot? Your voice is covered in stuff that tastes like snot?!"

Julie tried to hold back. She really did. But she failed. She burst out laughing, dropping Luke's water bottle in a futile attempt to hide it. "Luke, mucus is more than just snot," she tried to explain through her giggles. "But yes, that's what keeps your vocal cords moist."

Luke shook his head. To all the world, he may have looked like a man who'd just been told he was colorblind, that everyone else could see a universe of shades his eyes couldn't comprehend.

But only Julie would know the truth. At least some part of her mini-lecture on vocal health got through.

Option 3 -

"Okay, and then pass me the 205?" Flynn requested, holding out a hand to Reggie, who was sitting on the floor along with most of Flynn's tools.

"Um, the what?" Reggie asked sheepishly, glancing around at the various brushes, screwdrivers, and small tubes surrounding him.

"Oh, the switch lube," Flynn clarified, pointing at a small jar. "It's GPL 205G0, and there's lots of types of keyboard lubricant, so we usually just use the numbers to ID them."

"Oh, right, sure," Reggie responded, passing her the container. "Sorry. Computers aren't really my thing."

"Well that's what you have me for," Flynn pointed out, smirking. "I fix your glitchy keyboard, you keep me from failing math."

Reggie laughed and leaned back against Flynn's bed while she worked. After a minute, she passed him back the jar and started fitting the keys back into place. He entertained himself by inspecting the black lid.

"Wait, so the lube is what flavor?" he asked, looking up at Flynn again. "Da-vinny-key?"

"Divinikey," Flynn corrected easily. "And that's a brand, not a flavor. Please don't eat keyboard lubricant."

"Well I wasn't planning on it..." Reggie said, letting his sentence trail off suggestively.

"Reginald Jacob Peters, you wouldn't dare," Flynn warned, shooting him a glare over her shoulder.

He held her eyes for one moment. Two. Three. Fo-

Reggie burst out laughing, with Flynn only a moment behind.

"I make no promises," Reggie wheezed as he got his breath back.

"I'm not taking you to the hospital when it poisons you," Flynn shot back, her grin betraying her words.

Thank goodness Reggie's keyboard was done already.

Thank you, sorry for wasting your time with my brain worm!

[moonjxsung]

so we're all struggling right now huh ... 😭

just want to let everything out, you don't have to read or post this ml <3

tw for sexual trauma mention ? not sure

im really upset recently because i had to cut off the only guy i found myself comfortable being around, and guess why !! he wanted my body !!! 💯💯💯🎉🎉🎉🎊🎊🍻🍻🍻🍻👏🥳🥳🍻🎈🎈 no but seriously im really upset. he was an awful texter and communicator, and he knew i had really big struggles with abandonment PLUS attachment. i had to beg him to text me back and just talk to me, which he still didn't unless i was (reluctantly) flirting with him or if i was venting to him and needed him.

we saw each other in person while he was at my work for a while, and then tried to literally have sex with me there ???????? i told him no and brushed him off since i was uncomfortable with it (it's my fucking job hello why are u trying to fuck). about a week before he came to see me, i opened up to him about my sexual trauma and disassociation issues, and he literally said "i don't even wanna touch you now" after. PLEASE TELL ME IF IM TWEAKING BUT THAT REALLY UPSET ME WTF and then also made fun of me when i was having a disassociation episode ummmmm anyway!

i texted him and again begged him to talk to me and asked him why he acted the way he did, and he apologized so i thought he'd change. HE DIDNT 🔥🔥🔥🔥

he continued to flirt and be sexual with me even though i wasn't really comfortable with it, but i was really attached so i let him get away with it even though i knew i shouldn't. then i told him how i was panicking about that old guy at my job (the one i told you about WHO GOT FIRED WE CHEERED) and he completely left me to deal with it on my own and i was PANICKING. i even texted him twice after my meeting and he still to this day hasn't texted me back (i texted two weeks ago). i haven't reached out since and he hasn't checked on me once 🔥🔥🔥🔥 me when i attach to cold nonchalant men who i think i can fix then end up hurting myself 🔥🔥🔥🔥

-🦢

Ohhhhhh classic case of a man only keeping you around because he wants to use you but he’s a fucking terrible person in every sense of the word!!!! I know this trope very well it sounds like my ex 😍 and then they only reach out when they want nudes or to sext and then they disappear again 😍 mmmm yeah do that thing again where you treat me like fucking garbage and I’m too stupid and naive to walk away 😍 so hot

Also not him trying to have sex at ur place of work….. AND THEN WHAT HE SAID WHEN YOU OPENED UP ABT YOUR TRAUMA???? HELLO?????????????? Hoooooly fucking shit I am so sorry I literally had a visceral reaction to READING THIS I want to k!ll him actually

Cold nonchalant men who ghost u unless they want sexual favors in return my beloved 🔥 exactly my type 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 I am so fucking sorry jfc please tell me you’re aware that you deserve SO much better and you dodged a bullet with him 😭😭 sending all my love I guess we really are just going THRUUUU it this week. Who else up ruminating and yearning for the past so they could go back in time and do it differently 😍 feel better bby I’m here if you need anything :( 🫶

[eohpmdsteams]

Zhen@Bastion

The Ho-oh glances at Bluey before turning his attention to Bastion. "Say you like her, don't you? I know its rough hearing what she said then, I don't think its too late, Ya know. Give it a bit of time. Need a little convincin' you know?"

Bastion: Don't get me wrong I care for and love Bluey. We've known each other our whole lives. She was all I had for over a decade regarding companionship. Even though I do have feelings I care enough about Bluey to want her to be happy and find someone perfect for her even if it isn't me. But it's this guy she's into that I can't stand. Bastion: This guy has only taken her for granted. She's been doing everything right when it comes to Bisharp courtship and it's as if she was doing it at a brick wall. It's infuriating because Bluey goes out of her way for this guy and his little brother and never even asks for so much as a thank you. She's so kind, so caring, and genuinely is a good person despite it all, and I know this guy is just gonna treat her like garbage. Bluey deserves a good relationship. I just don't want a guy like that to make Bluey....stop being Bluey. Bastion: But then again maybe this guy really just is the world's densest Bisharp. Maybe all it takes is her literally spelling it out for him. If he makes her happy I want her to be happy. It stings yeah. But I am not gonna ruin what might make her happy, and give her the one thing she's wanted since we were kids, just for my own selfish feelings that I can't even tell if it's really romantic or platonic love in nature. It's just complicated....y'know.

[crucifiedkiss]

◌ೆ୧　 ͢YOUR MAIL HAS BEEN DELIEVERED ♡

  ಲ ͏ㅤ ׅㅤㅤcw: byler (obv), requested by anon ♡, SPOLIERS FOR SEASONS/EPISODES, me obv yapping and being extra silly, long ahh post its just me yapping abt byler, mike wheeler x will byers (byler ...), me sorta reaching/making big assumptions (taking every last crumb), heavy queer-coding and stuff, byler analysis ++ more realistically, mention of elmax, me being a english teacher 😭, internalized homophobiaㅤ✿𝅼

( ｡>﹏<) "so excited omg im kissing u anon /p/silly im all over the place srry !! i, personally, find mike unlabeled (possibly bi-curious or gay), who is just stuck between two pretty siblings of opposite genders. i am not a mileven, but i do support and whtvr evidence mileven fans have of mileven im vry open to listen to since we all have different povs/perspectives ^_^ this is all my opinion and my view on byler/the hints at byler :)" ⏤ c.k.　と

　ㅤ، ׁ 　 ͢ANON SENT A LETTER ♡

ㅤㅤ❛ ⠀⠀B..Byler analysis.. I wanna see what u think...

𝜗୧ ּ݂⠀💌 me yapping about byler ﹗

　　　⏤　 s1, mike is inside the house with wills letters and art. he handles them with such care (this is not only shown in s1, of course seen in the other seasons aswell), while in later seasons, with his own girlfriends letters, he treats them rather with disrespectfully as if he doesnt care about them, casually tossing them away in garbage cans or just disregarding them completely. u would think that he would treat both with such love, or atleast caring more for els letters, but no. when he see mikes room in one scene, u can see many of wills drawings either hung around or somewhere just in his room (under his bed, on his desk, etc.). nothing is rlly in his room that could be from el which is odd. in els room, we can see literal photos of mike practically everywhere (on her desk, hung up, etc.) .. mike doesnt wanna reciprocate doing the same tho ?? just having letters and stuff just from will ??? im onto u mike. back to the scene of mikes room, he has a mirror on his closet door which could mean that he is in the closet himself and inside the closet there is a red-ish orange shirt/jacket/whtvr which could relate back to s1 will as on his jacket there was a rather similar color to it AND the light of the closet is on meaning that once more it could mean that he is in the closet, aswell having a sign pointing towards the closet saying one way, AGAIN meaning that he could be in the closet. anyways. if u stop at just the right time, still in mikes room, u see a blue owl. a blue owl can symbolize endless compassion towards others and this owl was last seen in s1 where mike and will were quite big characters (and still are) (this owl also could link to vecna but that is not what we r talking abt rn ...)

　　　⏤　 the beloved van scene. literally immediately, we see mike staring so obviously at wills lips and looking him up and down (keep this in mind cause im gonna tell u at the end of this paragraph how many times this has happened LOL). as will hands mike the painting, after asking if will had made it, light starts shining through the window a little more, insinuating he was happy that will painted smth for him. when will mentions that el had commissioned it, the lights becomes more faint and mike looks so much more disappointed after, obviously liking the idea of will making it just for him better than it being made cause of el asking it to be (he likes the idea that will was thinking of him, to put it more simply, but instead it was only made cause of el). as will points to the painting, u can see just barely how they touch, and as the camera points back at mike he is biting his bottom lip. ur getting a little to obvious mike😭 with will mentioning mike being the 'heart' of the party, it could be such a barely noticeable way to say 'im inlove with u' or smth along those lines. as will yaps abt that, mike literally has his breath hitch ??? just at will saying he is the heart and that he is holding everything together ?? the light begins to return meaning that mike became genuinely happy as will said that (sunlight is used as a way to describe a mood, and seeing how it is shining, it means its more lighthearted/friendly/happy ... whtvr. probably shouldve said this earlier ^_^). "when youre different, sometimes u feel like a mistake," will says, perhaps meaning that he feels wrong for liking mike, his male bestfriend, but this could be quickly disregarded as will says, "but u make me feel like im not a mistake at all," which could still mean smth similar to that tho if rlly thinking abt it. the sunlight comes back once more, again giving this lighthearted feel to whats around as that is being said/after being said. also, mike is gulping saliva SO MUCH😣 R U OK POOKIE ??? after a bit more yapping, will says, "el needs u mike, and she always will," with more light shining through. he mightve wanted to say, "i need u mike, and i always will." but idk. mike responds with, "yeah?" with a small smile, needing confirmation that will truly thinks this. will nods, of course confirming his words. as this happens, the light appears again a brighter than previously. if u look just close enough into mikes eye, a small heart is in the reflection of it (THIS IS KINDA A REACH BUT IDC TBH). after this heartfelt moment, mike looks down at the painting will had given him (taking one more quick glance at will with a smile) as will turns away, looking out the window, beginning to start crying—likely sad that mike has not realized his feelings and how much he loves him—which mike surprisingly doesnt notice, only giving a small look before going back to look at the painting. mike looked at wills lips/looked him up and down 7-8 times ... MIKE GET IT TOGETHER HELPPP. ALSO: with the painting that will gives mike, mike is aware that it was for a 'crush of his' or smth of wills, making mike possibly flustered in a way (<- mike had read the note, so he already knows the information abt it meaning to be for someone he likes).

　　　⏤　 s4, when mike is calling out to el, the vines around her neck only tighten, showing that she doesnt believe rlly anything he is saying. will has to practically pressure mike to say 'i love u', which even then mike still hesitates and stalls slightly before rlly saying it. when mike rlly does say it, his facial expression shows off that he is lying. when lying, u normally look away or smth like that, and before saying 'i love u', mike of course does this. as mike says this, the vines once more tighten. el does not believe mike truly does love her. mike says that he is srry for not saying ily enough and that it wasnt because he was afraid of her ... this same season he was literally afraid of her because she hit someone with a freaking rollerblade, so he is lying, and has said multiple occasions 'what is wrong with u' and been scared of her. a little after, mike literally recites what will says during the van scene, obviously not knowing what to say. notice, the vines r STILL tightening. mike also says, "i feel like my life started that day we found u in the woods," right infront of will knowing full-well that day was also the day when will ... vanished. he literally contradicts himself in multiple occasions with this sentence, his life obviously 'not starting' that day he saw her in the woods. mike calls el 'superhero' once more, just more of superhero idolization (is that what u call it), only ever praising/appreciating the quality of her powers. el wants love, not idolization. mike is so homosexually repressed that he cant even notice anything else about el besides her powers, as if thats all she is good for. more lightening strikes in els pov, showing that she KNOWS he is lying, vines STILLL tightening. mike is just saying stuff that he knows el wants to hear, pretty much. el only breaks when both seeing and hearing that max is in pain (guys do we like elmax on tumblr) and not her own bf spilling his love out for her (lying or not).

　　　⏤　 BODY LANGUAGE. MIKE WHEELER BODY LANGUAGE. when in wills room and mike is apologizing (woah), he lifts his brows. if u do research, an eyebrow flash is a usually unconscious social signal, a raising of the eyebrows for about a fifth of a second that communicates a wish to approach another whom the sender recognizes and is preparing for social contact. an eyebrow flash can be used to communicate a desire to approach someone and prepare for social contact, add emphasis to a message, similar to a facial exclamation point or question mark, be used as a form of flirtation, and be a reaction to fear, surprise, disbelief, or disapproval. in this case, it is likely a more flirty way, if using context clues (mike smiling, the voice lowering, holding eye contact, etc.). in this same scene, mike when he sits down literally CHECKS OUT WILL😓 anyways. a smile along with a eyebrow flash (or raise) could mean that u have an romantic interest in them. during the digging scene (dig dig dig guys), mike just looks at will. for no reason. will wasnt even talking and mike proceeded to look at him. when will goes to look at mike, making eye contact between the two, mike gets embarrassed in a way and looks away (or a panicked response), giving a triple take at will before beginning to dig genuinely. a triple take is more 'extreme' form of the double take. it usually happens when two people are trying to check each other out at the same time and keep making awkward eye contact, looking away but not without giving exactly three glances towards the person once more before finally looking away. during the same scene, mike proceeds to lick his lips. when youre attracted to someone, your mouth may produce more saliva. licking lips is a way for people to show interest in someone, adrenaline and norepinephrine can cause physical symptoms of stress, such as dry mouth, when youre around your crush, and thinking about saliva can cause you to create more saliva, which can lead to more thinking about saliva. mike licking his lips whilst looking at will shows more evidence of byler not being one-sided. back to the van scene, mike has his lips parted, hitched breath or sharp intakes of breath, and flared nostrils. these r more common signs of showing that u like someone or r interested in them in a more romantic than platonic aspect. he holds eye contact the entire time which is usually done when attracted to another. he also blinks alot during this scene which is a sign of thinking nervously or anything like such. quick blinking can be seen as a sign of flirting tho, but in this case im not sure it is and mike is just nervous with will. blinking can increase when excited (mentally) abt smth, and mike is likely excited at just the thought of will alone. once more, his brows r raised, but stay raised. raised brows can show interest in what is happening or being said (in this instance, its said). he has such a longing look as he stares at will aswell, occasionally glancing down at his lips which can show he desires to likely kiss will, but obviously not being able to do so. THERE R SO MANY MORE INSTANCES BUT TO MUCH TO WRITE ... hope u enjoyed this english lesson on words :3 (im literally a nerd help me)

　　　⏤　 during the s4 scene where mike and will r having a argument in the skating rink, mike begins to walk away. will calls out to him, saying, "but what about us," and u can see mike take it the wrong way. 'what about us' can mean many of things, and mike took it as a more romantic way, leaving him to stop and turn around, showing off his face. looking closely, he looks confused and possiblynervous. there wouldnt be any reason to be nervous at these words unless u took it the wrong way, which mike, again, did, and confusion would be more normal. if mike didnt like will, he wouldnt have thought anything of it, of course. he says, "what?", in a more different tone, aswell. also, this might be a stretch, but looking at the lighting on their faces u see yellow and blue, which r the colors the two r linked with. after the argument, going to see what el had done, the lights r blue and yellow, as expected. mike goes under two yellow lights before stopping to the left of el, under a blue light, whilst will goes under two blue lights before stopping to the right of el, under a yellow light. they were under eachother lights, before ultimately ending up back to their original colors they r 'assigned' to (this can be also called color-coding or simply just a color (scheme) those characters stick with or seen with the most). this could mean that they r running away from this feelings of some sorts. while mike usually sticks to blue and will usually sticks with yellow, sometimes they will exchange colors, and occasionally wear green which is a mix of the two. when mike visits will in the hospital, he wears green ,,, when mike thought that will had died, he wore green. they wear green when they want to remember eachother as its a mix of the two colors. ANOTHER BIG STRETCH but when mike gets socks they r GREEN. mike mightve been thinking of will whilst getting socks. also, prior to this at the airport scene, mike gets el YELLOW FLOWERS and wears a YELLOW JACKET and his hat has GREEN IN IT and is wearing GREEN PANTS and a BLUE SHIRT ,,,, am i exaggerating. guys i might be delulu but, like. also, BACK to the skating rink, mike says, "were friends. were friends," as if trying to push it both onto him and will, once more experiencing that internalized homophobia, insisting on the fact that they r just 'friends'. mike also feels bad for making will feel bad, just going back to the topic of finding el to subside the fact he just made his bestfriend probably sad. also, just stands at wills side and doesnt try to comfort el at all after el hits that goober in the face ??? nor does will ???

[zuzsenpai]

This is another personal post with TW mental illness. I'm sorry there have been so many recently. I really have nowhere else to put these things. Feel free to ignore.

I don't think my depression has ever been this bad before, in the almost 13 years I've had it. For maybe the past two months it's been steadily growing to a point of intensity that I can't ignore. The absolutely awful feelings won't go away. I can't stop thinking about how miserable I feel.

I can barely take care of myself. I eat takeout every day. There's garbage everywhere at my house. I can't get shit done at work and at some point people are going to notice. I have multiple really REALLY urgent doctor's appointments/calls I HAVE to make (one of which is to my psychiatrist who apparently I'm blocked from messaging on the healthcare app), yet I can't seem to pick up the phone. I am mentally incapable somehow. There's a wall there.

I have been told to exercise and meditate and I physically and mentally cannot. Again, there is a wall.

I have a video game I wanted to play, I try to play it, and I feel completely unattached to it (even though I have loved it in the past). I joined a really exclusive roleplay community for that game and proceeded to be too overwhelmed to make the character application and now the mods are asking me what I want to do. I haven't written fanfiction in two months because of severe burnout, and I miss it so desperately that it's making me realize I might have been using it as a bandaid/distraction. But my brain is so fried that I feel too overwhelmed to write again. People are leaving me nice comments on my fics and I can't even bring myself to read them let alone respond to them. My memory is so bad that I can't remember a lot of what happens in any of my fave series' and I feel like creating good fan content for those things is impossible at this point.

I'm ignoring online friends in my favorite server. I promised multiple IRL friends I would watch animes they like and I am feeling guilty that I mentally cannot do that. I'm dreading the two anime cons I have coming up in March because I don't think I'm going to feel comfortable in my cosplay this year. I have a close friend (who is also my coworker) who keeps trying to get me to do things with her and her husband and I keep turning them down because I'm worried I'll get overwhelmed by social anxiety and general awkwardness. Just the thought of having awkward social interactions is terrifying me and pushing me down harder than it ever has.

I had a boyfriend between October 2022 and December 2023, but I felt like it was a huge chore every time I had to see him and I developed zero feelings for him. I felt repulsed by the thought of us being romantic. We ghosted each other in December and now I feel like shit about it because he may have been the only chance I'll ever have at a relationship... but I also am in such a bad state that it's probably good things are over. Why don't I feel relieved?

I'm having physical tics in my abdomen and jaw that are getting worse and worse to the point of pain and people noticing. I can't talk to literally anyone without sounding upset, negative, angry. I had my best friends from out of state over a few weekends ago and I was so sick the whole time, I felt like I was letting them down. I've been repeating awkward interactions with friends and coworkers over and over in my head to the point where I think about it at night.

I haven't put my Christmas decorations away because I fucking CAN'T.

This week has been particularly bad. Yesterday I was working from home because of snow. When the snow stopped I rushed to my parents' house because I needed to be somewhere with people I know. But I was so negative in how I spoke with them, and it's making me feel even worse. I used to be really talkative and intelligent when having conversations with my family, but depression has taken that away from me pretty badly over the years, to the point where I can barely talk without thinking about how absolutely dreadful I am at conversation.

But today might be the worst of it (unrelated to Valentine's Day, though it certainly isn't helping). It pained me emotionally and physically to get out of bed, and I wanted to take a mental health day. Literally fell back asleep for an hour before I had to get up and DREAMT about taking a mental health day. But being alone at home is actually so much worse than being at work where there are at least people I am comfortable with. So I went in. I have been absolutely bombarded with depressed feelings all day though. I get up to walk down the hall to the bathroom and somehow that feels worse than sitting and staring at my computer without accomplishing anything. I'm sitting here crying at work, completely destroying the four months of tally marks I had for 'days without crying at work'. I didn't break my record, sadly.

I have a therapist. I have an appointment with her today actually. Maybe I'll just read all of this to her. I don't know where it's going to lead or what she's going to tell me to do, but all I want is to walk down the hall to the bathroom and have at least average, neutral emotions instead of carrying a chest full of raging depression. I want to be able to say something happy to someone so that they don't dump me as a friend for being toxically negative. I want to live, and I have things to live for. But damn if this depression isn't making it extremely difficult to enjoy those things.

[kiwiana-writes]

Kiwiana's Christmas Fics

@stereopticons tagged me to share my Christmas/holiday fics and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I'm not sure how I feel about this list 🤣 I am a HUGE Christmas person... in the southern hemisphere, so I’m super out of my depth writing Christmas fics for most fandoms because winter Christmas just feels so fundamentally wrong to me. (I've done it exactly once, in 2019 with family, and I felt like I was in a Hallmark film.) Which does result in the Schitt's Creek list being... well, interesting.

Let's go.

Red, White & Royal Blue

All Those Christmas Clichés [Alex/Henry; rated M (subject to change); WIP (advent fic, daily triple drabbles Dec 1-25)]

Daily triple drabbles: snapshots of the lead-up to Christmas 2023.

Schitt's Creek

I see every part of you [David/Patrick; rated M; 1,514 words]

Patrick is a straight-up aficionado when it comes to giving gifts. David has known this from literally day one of their relationship, when he pulled a bunch of tissue paper out of a blue gift bag, looked away from a sentimental receipt in a solid frame and into a pair of earnest eyes, and thought, 'I hate it when Stevie’s right.'

How the reindeer loved him [David/Patrick; rated E; 2,178 words]

David wraps an arm around him, hand splayed across his chest to pull him close. “Tell me,” he says quietly. “I want you to dress up as Santa,” Patrick rushes out in one quick breath.

This is all I'm asking for [David/Patrick; rated E; 3,957 words]

But by the time they clean up after the party, and Patrick tactfully offers to take the garbage bags out to the shed to give the Roses a bit of family time, it’s well after eleven and David can only assume all their plans for the evening are out the window. That is, until they turn out of the motel parking lot and instead of Patrick putting his hand on David’s knee like usual it lands halfway up his thigh, fingers tracing absent circles around his inseam, and David realises that at least one part of the plan is still very much on the table.

Dear Santa... [Gen: David, Alexis, Patrick; rated G; 2,191 words]

Letters to Santa, 1987-1997

Do you wanna fuck a snowman? [David/Patrick; rated E; 7,216 words; co-write with @ships-to-sail]

David mimics her stance — and he has to admit, she’s not entirely wrong. In the quickly disappearing light, already blurred a little bit by the still-fallen snow, the snowman does look a little like he has tree trunk thighs and a well-formed ass, rather than being Frosty-shaped. But it’s the best they’re going to do, and David’s toes are officially cold.

I need some Christmas spirit [David/Patrick; rated T; 626 words]

David can handle his alcohol, is the thing. So no, it doesn’t occur to Patrick to warn him.

It probably should have.

Happiest Season

We always walked a very thin line [Abby/Riley, Harper/Abby; rated T; 2,775 words]

The girlfriend — Abby — stumbles over a lie about being Harper's orphan roommate, which… wow. Girl is a bad liar. Riley kind of wants to take her by the hand and tell her she’s going to have to get a lot better at that particular skill if she’s going to be in a relationship with Harper Caldwell. She doesn’t though, because it’s not her place and because who knows what, if anything, Harper has told Abby about her?

[nevarroes]

i refuse to send these thoughts separately:

who would cas main in league, he wouldnt play isnt an answer the mans gender is at least 25% calling people slurs on mic

okay but what if what if um 🥺👉👈 someone wanted to write a thing but they were super anxious about getting cas’s voice right in part because by the nature of how you share your creative concepts the only solid vibe they get is Doesnt Talk A Lot, When He Does Its 90% Weird Rude Mean Shit, hence the cesare big top burger comparison

and fuckin um i forget if ive ever asked, i mostly process cas’s fuckedupedness through a lens of npd, but am more familar with bpd because my own brain garbage is a bit of both and having had many loved ones with bpd, does cas ever fully freak the fuck out in an insecure attachment way trying to make gortash Go Away or trying to leave himself(but coming back generally), might characterize that Oh No Hes Going To Die leaves forever cant handle loss unless he “choses” it meltdown in a similar menthol eelnessTM vein

i especially love thinking about cas being extremely insecure because reality will never live up to his delusions of self importance perfection and grandeur because fun fact :^) a side affect of those thought patterns is constant disappointment in a reality of self that can never meet those expectations :^^^)

casim “i AM perfect or ill DIE” carnavorn

honestly "Doesnt Talk A Lot, When He Does Its 90% Weird Rude Mean Shit" is pretty on point here😭😭 I used to say like everyone desires him and then he opens his mouth and theyre like "hmmm yeah idk if this one's worth it chief". Like he has no filter at all but it isn't like he doesn't do it on purpose it's more like he goes out of his way to make sure everyone leaves in a worse mood than before, if that makes sense? Gortash would join in though honestly.... type of situation where Gortash tries to introduce them to some noble family on a party and Cas just drops that some poor girl looks like a fat cow (see this is funnier considering that he stands next to Gortash but ain't nobody gonna say that back) 🙏

aside from that though like.... in private? I suppose this may be more of a tone thing and I'm a VERY mid writer so I couldn't even tell you how I'd show this of the top of my head but I suppose he's more... clearly affectionately teasing? because yeah he obviously stays teasing and calls him a fat bastard in private still and such but it's very obvious if you look at them for a second that it's like a far cry from how he treats everyone else (smth smth his gaze very clearly softens and he allows himself to giggle and you can tell that they have been knowing each other for a long time)

okay sorry im YAPPING but ! ....If you want to write something I'd be over the fucking moon either way honestly like??😭 tbh I think you sound like you get him a lot already but also let me just say additionally... I see Cas as a character that's pretty flexible anyways because he erm... he has mood swings but also doesn't really have smth I'd consider a set speech pattern or something that he needs to sound in character?

anyways concerning the npd/bpd thing I never quite drew a line for him or anything to put him more into one camp but. I mean yeah based on the dying of old age scenario... LMFAOO but also yeah he does. Cas is the type of person that will literally leave the city for months or lock himself in and try to "become a new person" (he literally has moment where he's like "maybe I should just become who Bhaal wants me to be. maybe it would be easier") if there's some dispute with Gortash. It usually ends with Gortash forcing him to meet him again and Cas being something along the lines of "oh my fucking god can I just stop loving you already" but yeagh u know the fact that Gortash is kinda the only person he ever liked or even saw as a friend just makes it worse tbh

and the insecurities/delusions thing? yeah exactly what you said. a lot of his insecurities are insane too tbh like "I can never be what everyone desires" but then he loses it if he's NOT what someone desires, Gortash saying smth along the lines of "I like women too" would be enough to make him walk off a ledge because he can't be that part (smth smth I can be most perfect man on the planes but I'll never be a woman. funnier when u know he could use incubus illusion magic but he refused to his whole life). But anyways yeah as I said once Cas is like... a DEEPLY insecure person at his core even if he'd never admit or think that it shows

anyways after this analysis... Cas plays adc and shits on every support he plays with💯 He mains aphelios because he wants to look at a man but also because he thinks he's better than anyone else for playing a complex champ... hope u see my vison

[lokischickadee]

Rightful king of Asgard

Loki x OC

Celeste was sitting on the couch in Avengers tower. Loki walked over, looking her up and down. She looks up at him and smiled. “Can I help you?”

“I just wanted to let you know you look...gorgeous.” Loki winks with a smirk. “I'm Loki by the way.”

She smirks at his flirting. “My name is Celeste.”

“A gorgeous name to match a gorgeous person!” Loki steps closer, putting his hand on her cheek.

Celeste blushed at his words. She had heard the stories about how Loki could charm the clothes off of any person. “You really live up to your name don't you, silver-tongue?”

“Mhm, I suppose I do,” Loki says with a chuckle, a small grin on his face as he continues to look her in the eyes. he then leans in, and whispers in her ear. “I'm also great at getting beautiful women to melt in my arms. You look like a goddess, so I think a few compliments is the least I can do.” Loki continues caressing her face with his thumb.

“Would you like to know a secret?”

“Oh?” Loki looks intrigued by the comment. he raises an eyebrow, his other hand still stroking her cheek. He nods his head. “Go on. I'm all ears.”

She smiles. “I AM a goddess.”

“Oh, well then that's just perfect” Loki chuckles, seeming excited about this information. “I'm sure your beauty is known around the realms then?”

She laughs. “My powers and heritage is more known.”

“Hm, so are your powers that of the beauty and love goddesses?” Loki asks, leaning in a bit closer. “I'm just curious, that's all. It's not often that you see a literal goddess in the flesh”

“Actually yes! I am the daughter of Hades and Aphrodite,” Celeste says with a grin.

“Oh, well then I was right then.” Loki chuckles. “I'd say you probably inherited quite a lot of their abilities, considering your mother is literally the goddess of love? You really did win the genetic lottery, huh?”

She smirks and kisses his nose. “yes.”

Loki's face turns bright red, shocked that she actually did that. He smiles. “You know what, considering your mom is Aphrodite, I guess that's normal for you though, huh?”

“No, you are special,” Celeste says with a smile.

“Tell me, how did you discover you were a goddess?”

“I was born in Olympus right after the war between the Olympians and Titans.”

“Oh? The great war, huh?” Loki nods. “What kind of godly powers do you have?

“Pretty much all of the powers my mom and dad have,” she replies.

“Well, I imagine you have quite the arsenal then. What's it like being able to do all the things that they can? Do you feel...extra-powerful? Is there anything that you love doing, out of all the things your

abilities can accomplish?” Loki asks excitedly. he seems curious about all her abilities and he genuinely wants to learn more about her.

“A bit yeah.” She says with a laugh. “I protect the nine realms. I am only here right now because Thor needed me to help him with some kind of avengers business, I don't know.”

“Thor called upon the goddess of love to help with some silly battle?” Loki chuckles, shaking his head in amusement. “Well, that's...that's one way to utilize your abilities, I suppose.”

Celeste laughs. “I’m really the only god that will help him. The others choose to stay away cause of Odin.” She scowls at his name.

“You're angry at Odin?” Loki asks with an intrigued nod. He leans in a little closer, wanting to hear her explain her thoughts. “What has he done to you?”

“It's not what he's done to me. He's a monster, also he treats you like you are garbage and below him

when in reality it’s the other way around.”

“I suppose in a way I can see your point. He was the whole reason I became an outcast from Asgard.” He chuckles. “Perhaps even you can help me get some revenge when I go back there?” Loki smirks slyly.

Celeste smirks “Would you like the throne of Asgard?”

Loki laughs. “Well you have to admit, that would be quite a story for the ages, wouldn't it?” Loki chuckles again. “I could be the new king of Asgard, and you'd be my queen?”

“If you want!” She kneels and smirks. “My king.”

Loki blinks in a bit of disbelief. Was she really offering him the kingdom of Asgard? “...That's...that's quite the proposition, my lady. Are you absolutely sure this is what you want?”

Celeste stands up again. “Is it what you want? Don't worry about me darling.”

Loki takes a moment to think. he couldn't help but consider it...he would be king, and she would be his queen. It would be the greatest honor possible. He chuckles a little, his smile turning into a grin. “I accept, my goddess.”

“Do you want Odin dead or as a slave?” She asks with an evil smile on her face.

“I do hate Odin, but I believe that killing him would be too great an honor for him. I think we'd make more of a statement by forcing him to be our eternal servant, and to know that we are his betters,” Loki says after some thought.

Celeste laughs evilly. “I can strip him of all his powers leaving him vulnerable. I'll make him kneel to you.”

“Which is exactly why I want it done. He deserves to have his entire being and pride utterly and completely shattered,” Loki smirks, still very much excited and pleased to hear the goddess of love offer to enact such revenge. “I'd be forever grateful, my goddess.” Loki's smile turns from a bit of a normal, polite smile into the type of smile one would only see as they were about to commit an outrageous act of evil. he had a little of a mischief in his eyes, a look of satisfaction and anticipation. “Do what you must, my darling.”

Celeste grabs his hand and teleport you two to the throne room of Asgard. Loki's grip on her hand tightens. seeing the great halls of Asgard always made him a bit uneasy, but today he was determined to make a scene. he leans in, his face getting close to hers. “Let's go give that old bastard what he really deserves, huh?”

Odin appears. Loki rolls his eyes, and lets go of Celeste's hand. He raises an eyebrow. “Odin, you old fool. How are you this fine day?” Loki stands with his hands behind his back, a sarcastic and mocking smirk on his face. “As of today, this throne and this kingdom is no longer yours. My rule has just begun.”

A maniacal laugh escapes Loki's throat. “I will lead us into a new golden age. With me, and my lovely goddess by my side.”

Celeste looks at Odin. “Your reign has come to an end, you old hag.”

“Well, you heard her.” Loki chuckles, still with his arms behind his back. “Get to kneeling, you old fool. I am the king now.”

“I will never kneel to a monster like you,” Odin yells in defiance.

Celeste strips Odin of his powers leaving him vulnerable. She forces him on his kneels in front of Loki.

Loki watches in awe, his smile widening. to see Odin now, brought so low. It was a sight he never thought he'd see. He laughs again, this time he was laughing in true glee. Everything was going his way, and there was no one who would ruin it. “Look at you now Odin, weak and vulnerable. You are powerless before the might of Loki, the new king of Asgard! You'll be forced to worship us, and you'll be forced to bend your knee to us and beg for mercy.” Loki's cruel smile widens before he laughs again, seemingly enjoying the entire situation immensely. Loki smiles, watching the great god, who, only moments, ago ruled the realms with an iron fist, as he now kneeling there before him, is whole demeanor had changed. he had become a shell of his former self...and Loki couldn't help but feel a rush of power and control as he towered over the once mightiest deity.

“Why don’t you sit on the throne.” Celeste says with a smile.

“Yes, my queen.” Loki smirks, his eyes glowing with pride. He takes a seat on the throne, crossing his legs at the knees. Loki then looks at the goddess to his side. “You should join me, my love. We can rule together, and make Asgard the greatest realm of them all.”

She sits on his lap and kisses him passionately.

[dwarf-vader-of-middle-earth]

Hah, I had to drive out and grab a box of pasta to cook since grain moths ate all my others again. Anyway!!

On the drive home, I thought she was gone. LONG gone. But I swear, I saw my old neighbor and uhh... "friend" whom I haven't seen since... 15 years ago? Yeah about then. She was a garbage asshole.

I was so close to this girl for years, we talked on the phone every day for at least an hour or two, and we hung out whenever we could, and we shared all our secrets with each other.

But that "friend" kept saying I was too masculine a girl, that no guys would want a girl stronger than they are. I'd have to give up MMA and videogames and all around be more feminine if I wanted guys. And she tried SO DAMN HARD to convince me to give up being masculine as fuck.

She once asked about what boys I liked. I told her about the boys I was interested in, and she noticed they were all "outcasts". Not the popular kids. Not one guy on my radar was in the popular crowd. She wanted exclusively popular boys, and said I should also be seeking to gain the attention of popular boys instead of outcasts, because everyone should want to be popular!!

Mind you the popular kids are the reason I wound up in therapy with PTSD all these years later.

We had our second ever sleepover one night, and the next morning I went to make her chocolate chip pancakes! On my own!! She didn't even ask!!

But they weren't good enough and so she called me the next day and said she didn't want to be friends anymore because I made bad pancakes. She blocked my number, and in school, since we attended the same school together, she would literally cover herself in a hood and duck into crowds to avoid seeing me or my mother who worked the kitchen there.

Even her own father couldn't figure out why she was acting as she was. He tried to figure it out, and he was a great guy, but his daughter HATES him to this day for literally no reason. She didn't even call him dad, she used his first name to refer to him, even when talking directly to him.

I haven't seen this girl, heard from her, etc. in 15 years at least. I thought she moved away.

But I saw her tonight on my way home, and I laughed. Because I am nothing she wanted me to be. At all.

And her? She looked MISERABLE!!!!!

I'm the gayest manliest dudebro ever, and I love men. And well... men love me, too. But they don't love a miserable sexist sod.

And yeah, my life is far from beautiful. It's nowhere near perfect. But at least I'm living as my original and authentic self, not a carbon copy of what a bunch of asshats deem is worthy of recognition and praise just so I can gain their false favor and be at their whims as a literal puppet that spews hate and disdain for anyone different.

For frame of reference, those same popular kids told an actual legitimate long time friend of mine, word for word, "You have to leave <deadname> if you want to be popular." That friend wouldn't do it. She turned down popularity and stuck by me through and through until graduation.

Those same popular kids jumped me, ganged up on me, and threw food at me several times a week every week every year until we graduated. Even outside of school, I could not leave my house because they literally waited in the trees to spew swears at me from above and throw acorns and bark and stones.

Toward the last two weeks before graduating, I legally changed my name for transition purposes. I had deleted everyone I knew off all social media unless they were a close friend, and changed my media name as well, and nobody but 1 person has found me since in the following 6 years.

None of them know where I'm at, where I live, what my name is, they most likely cannot and will not find me. And that's how I like it.

Leave me dead to the fuckers who hurt me. I was dead to them before I changed my name, and what difference does it make that I killed the girl they knew and became the man I am today? I'm me, I'm an author who writes queer fiction mainly about men like myself, who all find the men of their dreams and they kiss, and it's great. I've got two books published in print paperback currently, and a bunch more in the works! And best of all is I've currently got another trans guy, also super masculine, who likes me and we've been talking!! And the feelings he's got for me are pretty mutual!!

Dudes love other dudes that are confident and capable and authentic. They don't like carbon copies of a damsel in distress that can't think or act for herself because she's so worried about losing the favor of the ruling populous.

Fuck the majority, and fuck what anyone else thinks of me. I'm gonna fuck a gay man and snuggle him as we make out dirty while giving the mental middle finger to all those who told us we weren't enough.

[crushpunchh-art]

Lilith is so special to me bcs she's like so complicated and I love every aspect of her character lol

Also love the way you express her guilt thru Ur art!!

I feel like not enough people explore that.

Like, Lilith spent 30 years in the cult, most of her life, and despite being a victim it also probably caused her to do horrible things, especially to loved ones (i.e. Eda), almost killing Luz (a child), and it left her morality to be very flawed especially in S1 and what we can assume was in-between her initiation and her leaving.

And imagine the guilt for her actions. Like yk she's just cringing at all the horrible things she did in the past, and the horrible things she let be done to her "for the greater good".

Hopefully this made sense :3

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES. ALL OF THIS EVERY SINGLE THING ABOUT THIS ASK. i feel like a lot of the time when people talk about lilith they act like its umm. a lot more black and white than it is? like either shes The Literal Devil (dont see this very often but theres this ONE GUY ON THE OWL HOUSE FANDOM WIKI.... endless entertainment watching them i promise you.) or Only a victim who Never did anything wrong.

like i love her BECAUSE shes garbage actually. she SUCKS in season 1. like obviously shes suffering but just. like. objectively? shes AWFUL. making fun of eda for her curse when She Caused it comes to mind. she SUCKED in s1! like, really badly! she kidnapped luz and was COMPLETELY unnecessarily menacing to gus and willow (girl chill out stop. you know damn well you could be handling this better) etc etc etc.

except also im like 90% sure she Knew she sucked. actually shes kind of the Leader of the Lilith Hater Squad. im not even sure its a case of flawed morals so much as a case of 'What Does It Matter? It's For The Greater Good'. / occasionally 'what the hell else am i supposed to do.' like does she KNOW shes doing awful things? oh totally. is she going to STOP? nope.

i would like to highlight. this part of your ask:

Like yk she's just cringing at all the horrible things she did in the past, and the horrible things she let be done to her "for the greater good".

lilith doormat truthers rise up. that woman lived under a man who hated her PERSONALLY for like 30 years. while her coworker was bullying her (Why was Kiki like that honestly like what was her damage when it came to Lilith. With Hunter okay sure. But Lilith??? Whatd she do to you???) you think she was STANDING UP FOR HERSELF? No! That woman hasn't stood up for herself since she was like 15! If she had she'd probably be dead by now!!!!

Sorry sorry sorry im ranting. I love her so much. Dumbest little cheeto puff who tries so hard and somehow still manages to do everything wrong.

TO THE ART BIT OF YOUR ASK: oh my god thank you so much!!! when im drawing her thats really like. what i try to focus on? like thats what i REALLY want to get across. that she feels so crazy guilty about everything.

thank you for having so many correct opinions about lilith. we will shake hands or if you dont want to do that we will nod approvingly at one another