#I lied about taking a break in December<33 it’s now.
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Hai guys. Real talk. I’m taking a break for a few days. I’ll either be back this Friday or on Thursday the 31st (for the fics and trick or treating). Sorry to say that I’m breaking my 32 week writing streak and my however many month streak of doing fandom days.
Blah blah reading and mental health stuff under the cut if you want more information.
TLDR is that I’m mentally ill and so so susceptible to getting stressed out. I haven’t felt this bad since June. Which is saying something because in June I was getting harassed every single day and had finals to do. It’s whatever
I appreciate the people that have reached out to me and put up with my constant complaining here and on my personal blog. I have problems with emotional vulnerability and can’t take anything seriously but it does mean a lot. I love you guys.
That being said I’m so serious when I say that if I don’t take a break I genuinely don’t know what will happen to me. My usual thing of projecting all my problems onto characters and brute forcing my way through the depression isn’t working so it’s either take a break and stop stressing out or killing myself and I think we know which option is preferred. Kinda have been running myself into the ground here for months.
Oh but Valerie no one is going to kill you if you just stop doing fandom days. Wrong! I’ll kill me. Blah blah long story blah blah childhood trauma I’m physically incapable of relaxing and being chill. Intense fear of disappointment plus self worth issues. Bad combination and it means that I view myself as something like a content machine for you guys and I’ll die if I don’t live up to my own impossible standards.
That isn’t to say that I feel like being here is a burden. No, I really love this fandom and the people here! I just have a lot going on in my personal life in addition to the things I promised to do here. I’m just tired, I think. Pushed myself too hard for too long and I’m crashing. I mean there are times recently that I’ve been neglecting myself just to make my own self imposed deadlines, and I’ve just generally been in a shitty mood so thanks for putting up with me.
Yes I’ll still be responding to dms and stuff but I just need a few days to like. Factory reset. I’ll be interacting but this blog will remain empty for a few days. Enjoy your peace from my bullshit and be free 💞
Generally during breaks and hiatuses it makes me want to crawl out of my skin and die when I can’t talk to people. But I also feel like dying when I am posting. So.
Might just come back Wednesday if I feel too awful about not doing fandom days. I don’t trust myself to stay away from here. The torture sphere has a sort of je ne sais quoi you know.
#I lied about taking a break in December<33 it’s now.#this isn’t to garner sympathy or anything I just feel the need to explain myself#don’t want to drop off the face of the earth without any notice#thpersonal#thambles#thposts#thanks for understanding. does a sick flip and breaks my fucking neck
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Qatar Memories; Part 2
↳ instagram files
➪ read the prequel (part 0) and part 1
summary: a few days after the match, you and mason went on a stroll at night to have a little catchup since you lost contact with each other after breaking up years ago. since then, the two of you have been getting closer and closer, with you hanging out with the england squad and being at their every game. this hasn't gone unnoticed by rúben who goes back on his word about relationships being a 'distraction'.
pairing: mason mount x reader, ft. rúben dias
a/n: I'd love to hear any feedback you guys have on this :))
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sasha__rebecca
tagged: jackgrealish
liked by meganpickford1, itsamelewigi, and others
sasha__rebecca had the day to ourselves ❤
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yourusername aww look at you two😍😍 I missed you today <33
↳ sasha__rebecca missed you too, you should've come with us!!
↳ yourusername nah I'd rather not thirdwheel the little time you guys have between matches, plus I was busy winning at basketball 😊
jackgrealish ❤❤
November 27, 2022
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masonmount ✔
liked by england, sterling7, and others
masonmount I never lose 😎
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yourusername except today you did
↳ masonmount I didn't take you to be a liar y/n 🤨
↳ yourusername no lies here, I won fair and square :)
↳ masonmount maybe you remember the match differently to me
↳ declanrice I was there mate, you lost 🤣
↳ masonmount bro you're supposed to be on my side?
↳ declanrice not this time, you're always fouling me when we play basketball
madders smiling through the tears yeah? 🤣🤣
↳ masonmount you too huh🙄 how has y/n got all of you on her side already??
November 27, 2022
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yourusername
tagged: masonmount
liked by jazbenham, masonfan1, and others
yourusername train ❌ sit on the ball for the entire session ✔
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jackgrealish you've got some good angles there y/n 😏
↳ yourusername I should've known you would say something like that 😐
masonmount not the entire session....
↳ yourusername oh yeah I forgot about those 2 minutes you spent standing up
↳ masonmount wrong again, it was closer to 3 minutes
↳ yourusername 😂😂
declanrice you running a fan account for mason now? 😂
↳ yourusername no declan, I'll leave that to you :)
↳ lukeshaw23 she got you there mate 🤣🤣
masonfan1 y/n giving us the content we all deserve 😍
November 30, 2022
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yourusername
liked by jpickford1 , sasha__rebecca, and others
tagged: masonmount, declanrice, lukeshaw23
yourusername the way to my heart 😍
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declanrice mason is almost there then 😂
↳ masonmount y/n won't admit it though 😏
johnstonesofficial slightly offended that I wasn't invited to this
↳ kylewalker2 and me 😤😤
↳ yourusername you two were too busy looking after Dave!!
↳ johnstonesofficial you and your excuses😐
↳ kylewalker2 we expected better of you y/n
↳ yourusername this whole thing wasn't even my idea, it was mason's😫
↳ kylewalker2 shifting the blame now are we?
↳ yourusername can you two stop ganging up on me?? 🥺🥺
↳ johnstonesofficial you owe me, kyle and dave some lunch
↳ yourusername fine, have it your way🙄😒
December 1, 2022
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yourusername
liked by declanrice, masonmount, and others
yourusername what's this doing in my room? 🤔
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declanrice strange... me and mase had nothing to do with this... nothing at all
↳ yourusername so strange!! I didn't think either of you did 😃
masonmount maybe it's a sign you should wear it tomorrow👀
↳ yourusername maybe it's a sign I should lock my room's door before leaving👀
↳ masonmount whoever put that there must have gone through a lot of effort, I think you should wear it for them
↳ yourusername not sure it's my style 😐
↳ itsamelewigi put the poor guy out of his misery and wear it for him 🤣
↳ yourusername I'll have a little think, no promises though...
philfoden mason's out here doing side missions between the training sessions 😂😂
December 3, 2022
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masonupdates
tagged: masonmount, declanrice
liked by yourusername, masonmount, and others
masonupdates Mason and Dec after the match with Senegal 💙
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masonfan1 imagine mason looking at you like that 😫
↳ masonfan2 do we know who he's actually looking at?
↳ declanrice @yourusername
↳ masonfan2 not dec replying to my comment 😭😭
↳ masonmount she was wearing my shirt so it was hard to look away 😅
↳ masonfan1 you two are so cute 🥺🥺
↳ masonfan2 MASON TOO? THIS COMMENT SECTION DOESN'T SEEM REAL
December 4, 2022
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masonmount ✔
liked by yourusername, laurenfryer_, and others
masonmount quarter-finals baby!!!
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declanrice my brother ❤
masonfan1 IT THAT Y/N IN THE BEREAL???
↳ masonfan2 OMG I THINK SO
↳ masonfan1 KINDA JELAOUS OF HER ICL
↳ masonfan2 IM KINDA JEALOUS OF HIM BC HAVE YOU SEEN Y/N 😍😍
↳ masonfan3 IS THIS MASON'S WAY OF CONFIRMING HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH Y/N??
December 4, 2022
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aprilivymusic ✔
tagged: rubendias
liked by rubendias, rubenfan1, and others
aprilivymusic bumped into a familiar face today 😄
rubendias it was nice to catchup 😊
↳ aprilivymusic we should do it again!! x
y/n&rubenfan1 didn't rúben say he wanted no distractions?? my guy is confused
↳ y/n&rubenfan2 he's probably jealous of y/n and mason that's why
↳ y/n&rubenfan1 are they actually together??
↳ y/n&rubenfan2 mason fans seem to think so
↳ y/n&rubenfan1 oh... I guess it's time I change my username 🥲
December 5, 2022
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#mason mount#mason mount x reader#mason mount imagine#mason mount oneshot#mason mount fic#mason mount fluff#mason mount blurb#chelsea#chelsea fc#england nt#football#footballer imagine#ruben dias#ruben dias imagine#ruben dias x reader#ruben dias fic#ruben dias oneshot#man city#mcfc#mountsmasonfics
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One Last Chance
“But you have forsaken Me and served other gods, so I will no longer save you. Go and cry out to the gods you have chosen. Let them save you when you are in trouble!” Judges 10:13-14NIV
My conversation with God was passionate. He’s promised to show up and change the world, (Isa.33:10). Yet, ‘now’ hasn’t arrived. I’m hearing prophecies from various prophets. One details— God’s going to come to earth with His love arresting the hearts of people who have always seen Him as harsh. Another prophet relates— December is the month of multitudes of deaths. He’s the first to put a timetable on this. Several have stated millions of deaths are coming. Death breaks my heart.
Why God are you going to allow so many people to die and go to hell? Why can’t You come with Your love first so everyone will be saved and let satan have only a few? My ‘why’s’ are endless. ‘I believe Yahweh, everyone of those stories in the Bible, the Red Sea parting; the fourth man in the fire; Daniel napping with the lions, please show up with one of those big events and blow everyone away.’
I was prompted to open my Bible to Judges 10, not a pretty story by a long shot. Makes me think of the rumors about a couple of our former presidents. Suddenly my mind opened up and I began to understand what God was saying.
Romans 1:18-20NIV “The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of people, who suppress the truth by their wickedness, since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.” He’s given us chances. We have more gospel preached in this nation than any other nation in the world. Our churches have compromised the reverential fear of God for lies, money, fame, numbers, and fear.
Startling conditions have formed throughout every mountain of society. My future granddaughter, doing student teaching, had two children, one second, one third grade, a male and a female fondling their genitals during class. ‘That’s okay,’ she’s told, ‘they need to experiment with sexual gratification.’ Say what? There’s an agenda to push all forms of sexual deviates and orientations on children. Someone needs to fear God reading Matthew 18:6. This example is merely the tip of the iceberg.
Holy Spirit continued talking to me. He’s given people abundant opportunities to know Him. Church members fund sexual trafficking, pornography, and pedophilia as at high a rate as the unchurched. “Remember, …what you have received and heard; hold it fast, … repent. But if you do not wake up, I will come like a thief, and you will not know at what time I will come to you.” Revelation 3:3NIV. Wake up people! We have one last chance! Yahweh will allow satan to take every life whose heart is cold towards Him.
Text’s V15-16 “…the Israelites said to the Lord, “We have sinned… Then they got rid of the foreign gods among them and served the Lord. And He could bear Israel’s misery no longer.” Mercy is quick to come when people repent. The horrors of these deaths can be avoided— IF— God’s church will repent before our God and put away her idols of silver, gold and prestige. Also, getting down on their faces before Him in reverential fear, and worship Him.
Will you take this one last chance? Or will you wait for your gods of money, government and evening news to save you? It’s your choice. You choose.
LET’S PRAY: LORD God I plead for mercy. Shake Your church again with holy conviction. I plead with You to spare my generations, in the name of Jesus Christ I pray.
by Debbie Veilleux Copyright 2023 You have my permission to reblog this devotional for others. Please keep my name with this devotional, as author. Thank you.
#Jesus Christ#lord of lords#word of god#god#holy spirit#it's your choice#devotional#one last chance#serve#believe#mercy#deaths#gods#money#government#media#wake up#love#hope#faith
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Let’s go through these names:
Sarah Reed (Black), 32, had severe mental health issues which was known to prison officers and doctors. She had been complaining about being unwell and untreated to her mum for a long time. She was found dead in her cell at Holloway Prison in 2012, they lied and said she was found hanging in her cell, she wasn’t - she was found in her bed. There’s video footage of a police officer punching her and grabbing her hair after she was arrested for shoplifting - the officer was suspended and faced no criminal charges.
Mark Duggan (Black), 29, in 2011 Mark Duggan was shot by police in Tottenham, London, the police chased him in a minicab claiming he had a gun - a gun was later found 7 metres away from the minicab. Protests and riots in London and other areas of England ensued. The police were cleared of any wrongdoing.
Sheku Bayoh (Black), 31, was murdered by police in 2015 in Fife, Scotland. Very similar to George Floyd, Bayoh was knelt on by police for 9 minutes. Much like George Floyd, Sheku Bayoh’s last words were also ‘I can’t breath’. The police were not charged.
Christopher Alder (Black), 37, was a computer programmer for the British army. He was arrested in 1998 after he was punched at a nightclub and was supposedly ‘aggressive’ at a hospital. He was found ‘face down on a custody suite floor, with his trousers round his ankles and his hands cuffed behind his back, while police officers made monkey imitations and references to banana boots and a hood with slits.’ The officers were cleared of any wrong doing.
Smiley Culture (Black), 48, Culture stabbed himself in the heart (hmm) when police raided his home in London. His death was a contributing factor in the 2011 riots.
Jimmy Mubenga (Black), 46, Mubenga was being deported - three private security guards held him down on the plane and restricted his breathing, despite already being handcuffed to the seat. His last words were also ‘I can’t breath’. Th officers were cleared of manslaughter.
Michael Powell (Black), 38, Powell had many mental health difficulties and dealt with it by taking drugs. In 2013, his mother called the police on him after he started smashing car windows this a hammer, she was afraid and just wanted him restrained. Several police officers came and subdued him using pepper spray. He died in the back of the police van. All officers were cleared but it’s okay because over 10 years later, police have apologised for the pain and suffering he was in.
Leon Briggs (Black), 39, Briggs died in custody in 2013 after being held under Mental Health Act but no medical intervention was sought, he became unconscious and died. Police officers were cleared of any wrong doing. They were suspended with full pay.
Ricky Bishop (Black), 25, police in Brixton, London, in 2001 claimed Bishop was attempting to escape so held him down, he had a heart attack. He was still in cuffs when he arrived at the hospital. All officers were cleared.
Brian Douglas (Black), in 2005 PC Tuffey hit Douglas over the head with a police baton. Douglas was arrested and despite vomiting in his cell, he wasn’t taken to the hospital until 14 hours later, he suffered a fractured skull and damage to his brain stem. No disciplinary action was taken against the police.
Joy Gardner, (Jamaican), 40, “They say she was ‘illegal’, but she wasn’t illegal. She came here legally, she paid her fare, but she overstayed her time.“Then they broke into her flat, put 13 feet of tape around her head and a belt on her legs, and they suffocated her.” The police were cleared.
Roger Sylvester (Black), 30, Sylvester suffered from mental health illnesses. He was arrested in 1999 and held down by six officers. He fell in to a coma and never regained consciousness. The police were cleared of any wronging.
Azelle Rodney (Black),16, was shot by police 6 times in 2013. The officer said he suspected Rodney was hiding a machine gun. No machine guns were found on his person. The officer in question was arrested and sent to trial but the jury found him not guilty.
Habib Ullah (South Asian), 39, ‘During one hearing Emma Forbes, who was present at the time, said officers had held Mr Ullah face down on the ground at one point, and said they had “their hands around his throat, pressing down and putting their hands in his mouth at the same time”.’
Faruk Ali (South Asian), in Luton 2014, two police officers laughed as they chased after Ali, (who is autistic and has the mental age of 5) in their car and the proceeded to beat him. Thankfully, Mr Ali is alive and well. This incident lead to protests and a demand for justice for people with mental health issues. The police officers were sacked but no charges were made against them.
Adrian Thompson (Black), 34, Thomson was tasered by police after he was accused of breaking into flats when in fact he went to a friend’s birthday party. He died in the back of the police van.
Jean Charles de Menezes (Brazillian), 27, was shot by police after they suspected him of being a terrorist a day after the London 7/7 bombings in 2005 (he was not, it was mistaken identity but police shot first). No officers were charged, his parents took the case of the ECJ but they lost the fight.
Demetre Fraser (Black), 21, Fraser died after falling 11ft from a tower block in Birgmingham in 2014 after being chased by police. Police were not at fault according to met.
Aston McLean (Black), 27, McLean was being chased by police in 2014 when he was hit by an armed response vehicle. McLean was pepper sprayed before he was hit. officers cleared.
Olaseni Lewis (Black), 23, Lewis died after being restrained by 11 police officers. Officers were not charged but a law called ‘Seni’s law’ came into effect in 2018 ‘ Under the new legislation, hospitals will be required to publish data on how and when physical force is used.’
Anthony Grainger (Black), 36, was shot through the chest as he sat in a car in the village of Culcheth, Cheshire, by an armed police officer known as “Q9” in March 2012. Police were cleared.
David “Rocky” Benett (Black), Benett suffered with mental health illnesses. He was restrained for 25 minutes by up to five NHS staff members. He had punched a female member of staff after being moved to a different ward to separate him from another patient he had hit, but who later attacked Mr Bennett and racially abused him.“Rocky died a brutal death,” Dr Bennett said. “He was pinned face down on the ground by the very people who we trusted to care for him. “It breaks my heart every time I think about that night and it will live with me and my family forever.”
Alton Manning (Black), 33, “Manning, a prisoner on remand, and was killed on 8th December 1995 after being assaulted by prison officers at the private prison HMP Blakenhurst. An Inquest, which originally opened on Monday 12th January 1998 and concluded on 25th March 1998, unanimously decided that Alton Manning was unlawfully killed.” The officers were cleared.
Mark Nune (Black), 35, police acted as judge, jury and executioner after shooting Nune during a robbery.
- it’s not mentioned here so I’m not going to go into it right now by please search up Stephen Lawrence, it is an extremely important case and if there’s one thing you can do for his memory is learn about him and remember his name.
#uk politics#black lives matter#this took me over an hour and now I'm depressed#but that's okay baby before I'm an educator (;#forgive for any errors#I really did spend over an hour#I use google so you don't have to
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101 Open MHA Gen Prompts
I had a very long ask game where people gave me fake titles and I came up with fic ideas to go with them. Multiple people asked to use some of them as prompts, and some of my friends have lately maligned the lack of gen prompts out there, so I decided to compile them all into a single post. Almost all of these are gen, aka not shipping, but you can do what you want I’m not your boss. Everything is free and open to use WITH CREDIT, so have fun with my word vomit.
1. In Dreams I Had the Sun - Being the number one hero isn’t all it’a cracked up to be, Toshinori realizes early on
2. The Chainlink Fence that Held the Ocean - In his new book post-retirement, All Might opens up about his regrets, struggles with mental health, and his issues with the hero system as a whole. The backlash is swift and intense.
3. Welcome to the Loud Silence - After an injury, Izuku is rendered deaf.
4. Water Since Turned Red - After a villain attack nearly kills All Might, the beach where Izuku used to go to find comfort now feels tainted.
5. all scrap left untouched is bound together - A group hero students who failed the provincial license exam for the third time, effectively ending their careers before they start, get together to take revenge on UA’s first years who beat them out.
6. You’ve saved more more times than you know - Times All Might saved people without his powers, just by being a cool, nice dude.
7. No Amount of Tragedy Can Justify Your Actions - A dying All for One tries to justify his centuries of cruelty to an uncaring Toshinori.
8. To Leave a Cage Locked - One for All is conscious and has a will of its own, one that doesn’t always line up with Izuku’s wellbeing.
9. Okay, who let in the Kraken? - Izuku is the reincarnation of an ancient eldritch horror.
10. keep us alive up above - Izuku and Shigaraki get trapped together somewhere. Izuku knows he needs the villain’s help to survive and escape, but the other would rather they both die.
11. The world will revolve around me neither less - The ebbs and flows of AFO’s influence over the years.
12. More Roulette, Not Russian - Kids get their quirks swapped.
13. Patron Saints - Toshinori teaches a class about pre-quirk superhero comic characters and their influence.
14. Don't Come Back - Touya Todoroki’s first few weeks after a severe injury resulted in his father abandoning him.
15. The Blessed and the Fool - Toshinori meets up with a few of his ua classmates after retiring.
16. Not Your Sacrifice - Some of the other kids have started adopting some of Izuku’s self sacrificing habits and the teachers are concerned.
17. Break in the Storm - Villains use a power outage as an opening to break into ua.
18. One Day Those Consequences Will Finally Catch Up - Even though the teachers don’t take her concerns seriously, Inko saves every piece of evidence regarding people hurting her son.
19. a garden in their eyes - Izuku meets a fan who got injured after trying to step into a villain fight, just like he did, and it makes him question some things.
20. what could have been, if not for you - After Inko divorces him, Hisashi’s goes to the press to say All Might stole his wife and son.
21. Promised Misery - All Might finds out the severity of Bakugou’s bullying, and warns him he’s on thin ice with him.
22. Fly Up Higher, Blossom Brighter - Izuku has to write a paper for middle school about being positive, intercut with all the bullshit he has to deal with.
23. Libre Me from Hell - One of Izuku’s new quirks is spiral related.
24. No One to Blame but Yourself - Izuku’s kindness doesn’t extend to murderers, tragic backstory or not.
25. At Its Finest - Izuku accidentally gets involved in a hero commission coverup.
26. A Rising Issue - Izuku starts developing more severe side effects of his injuries. He’s convinced he’s under the influence of a quirk, while the adults thing he’s finally gone too far hurting himself.
27. What you are in the Dark - Izuku usually keeps most of his anger to himself until he can’t.
28. nowhere to go - Inko moves into UA after their home was destroyed.
29. Something Without - My theory about the 2 OFA vestiges that are blurred out is they don’t approve of izuku as a successor. Izuku tries to figure out why.
30. Walking with a Ghost - Toshinori joins the OFA dreams while he’s in a coma. He gets to reunite with nana, and is more open to Izuku about his past and feelings. Part of his starts to wonder if it’s worth waking up, since he will die and join the others eventually.
31. Death By Crying - Izuku is affected by a quirk that will suffocate him if he expresses any emotion.
32. Justice is Subjective - The hero commission gets to Shigaraki before AFO does.
33. Undo / Underdog - Death loop fic. Izuku keeps reliving the day he met all might after being killed by the sludge villain. he has to find a way to break the loop and survive, but he gets s little weaker every time he restarts.
34. Like Wildfire - A rumor that Izuku is All Might’s bio son picks up steam, and the characters have to decide whether to deny it but risk suspicion or play along and add a new layer to the lies protecting one for all.
35. Once Upon A December - All Might and Inko actually met in the past trope.
36. Some Legends Are Told - All Might’s first interview post-retirement.
37. Will The Real Mentor Please Stand Up - Aizawa considers himself the better teacher, but a lot of the kids seem to like All Might more.
38. I don't want the cure, I want the POISON! - Inko is killed in a hit and run, and Izuku becomes desperate to find the killer.
39. I will kill my heart before I dance on stage for these bigots - Izuku is interviewed as a rising star of UA, and the interviewer brings in some of his old bullies because they claimed to be his friends from middle school. Izuku does not play along.
40. Split Ends - A quirk gives Izuku brief visions of what would have happened if he made different decisions.
41. Dreamless Sleep - A One for All dream leaves Izuku with a cryptic half-warning, and he desperately experiments to try and figure out how to trigger the visions to get the rest of it.
42. toxic flowers and pretty blades - Young Inko escapes the constricting life of her cruel wealthy family by becoming a vigilante.
43. The Suns we Orbit - Some of the other teachers believe Izuku is too codependent on Toshinori, and separate them for a time.
44. Submerged - Similar to those buried alive fics only someone’s in a box at the bottom of the ocean.
45. Deprive - Izuku also loses his stomach to an injury, and struggles to adjust to the necessary lifestyle changes.
46. The ashes fall like snow - Post Kamino cleanup.
47. Home will always be here - Inko cares for Izuku after he’s sent home due to “trouble at work study” but he refuses to clarify what that means.
48. Playing Favorites - A look at several times where Izuku was punished, while Bakugou got off scot free.
49. Elusive Dreams - Some kind of training or issue forces the kids to stay away for several consecutive day, and they start losing it.
50. Fracture - Izuku struggles through physical therapy after a severe injury that leaves his hero career in question.
51. Starlight, Starbright - Space cadet au
52. Someone in Your Corner - Gran Torino looking after Nana, Toshi, and finally Izuku through the years.
53. I cast magic missile into the darkness - Generic “the gang plays d&d” fic.
54. One Month At A Time - Izuku breaks a limb, and has to let in heal naturally over the course of several months.
55. Head Above Water - Izuku runs out of his pain meds and can’t get access to more doses for a while, so he has to endure not only the pain, but the withdrawal symptoms.
56. Are you going to leave a path to trace - All Might uses a new strategy to try and get Izuku to be less self sacrificial: what about all the young kids who are going to look up to him?
57. The View from Halfway Down - Izuku realizes that a risky move has just landed him with a potentially life threatening injury, but the fight it still going.
58. The Dust Bites Back - A villain All Might defeated early in his career is back and out for revenge.
59. The Absence of your Worth - Nighteye thinks he’s put together a rock solid case for why izuku isn’t worthy of One for All. All Might’s response is to ask if he has something against quirkless people.
60. Behind the Screens Nobody is Afraid - All Might explains some of the context of his most popular hero videos to Izuku. They are much more tragic than the media has spun them in hindsight.
61. Under the Light of the Moon - Someone gets turned into a werewolf. And I ain’t talking the wattpad piss shit. I’m talking full-on back-breaking monstrous transformations into a bloodthirsty abomination set to Bad Moon Rising.
62. some dreams were made to be broken - Bakugou crosses a line and finally gets expelled.
63. You Say You're Into Closure - Izuku finally beats Bakugou in a one on one fight fair and square, but Bakugou is a sore loser.
64. Something or Someone Missing - AU’s memories of Izuku get wiped, but those closest to him can’t help but feel an absence.
65. Too Little Too Late - Izuku’s father returns to find he’s been replaced.
66. Collecting Dust - Inko goes through the stuff Izuku didn’t take to the dorms.
67. Where the souls of wanderers go - Toshi meets up with a retired hero support group.
68. Fragility of Trust - Suspected traitor au
69. no one answered - Izuku is trapped in a cell in a building that’s collapsing in slow motion due to a quirk.
70. Eye of the Storm - One of the other kids has a panic attack for the first time between public appearances. izuku has never seen from from the outside.
71. To Whom It May Concern - The kids find a mysterious collection of letters from previous students hidden in the ceiling of the classroom. Some are ominous, some are incomprehensible. Aizawa has no answers. They enthusiastically go to try and solve the mystery within, but that excitement quickly diminishes the more they find out.
72. Of Popsicles and Ponytails - All Might gets in a discussion with the other teachers about whether the Clark Kent glasses thing would actually work. All Might bets them it does, so he goes around town with no disguise other than his hair being up, and no one bats an eye.
73. All Men are Not Born Equal - Word gets out to the public that izuku used to be quirkless. Everyone finds out just how deep anti-quirkless sentiments run when some begin to question whether a quirkless kid should be at ua, regardless of whether or not he has a quirk now.
74. Childhood is the kingdom where nobody dies - Something about encountering death in person for the first time being the dividing line between child and adult.
75. Sins of the Father - All for One has had many children over the centuries, and has made numerous attempts to groom them into the ideal heir with several different methods. None of them worked though.
76. Where The Dead Come To Rest - The kids come home after a long, grueling mission where they saw some shit, and are too tired to process what they went through. They take off their gear for plain clothes, then sit in the common room in silence long into the night, not wanting to open themselves up but also not wanting to be alone.
77. Rivalry - Nighteye tries to pit Izuku and Mirio against one another. It goes right over Mirio’s head, but Izuku becomes convinced the other boy is in on Nighteye’s plan to wear him down until he gives up One for All.
78. A Subtle Language - All Might and Nana never said out loud that they loved each other, but little things told them that they did. All Might hopes to pass a similar love down to his own successor. But Izuku is very different than himself as a kid, and he needs to learn a new subtle language of affection.
79. It’s Gone - One for All stops working one day.
80. A Sight For Sore Eyes - All Might looking after Izuku in the aftermath of the second movie.
81. Loose Lips (sink ships) - Bakugou blurts out something about One for All during a rage, so the rest of the class jump on him and Izuku for answers.
82. No Expectations - Word gets out that All Might is going to choose a successor. None of the theories or speculation online resemble Izuku in the slightest.
83. Eden was Only a Garden - Izuku gets hit with a quirk that erases some of his most traumatic memories, but in doing so loses part of who he is.
84. Run it Down - With all Izuku’s new quirks and his incredible skill, some of the other students with similar powers (Iida, Sero, Uraraka) start to feel like izuku is upstaging them. And it affects their friendship.
85. Fool's Gold - Bakugou grows even more jealous of Izuku having One for All, and his relationship with All Might. He thinks that if he could just prove himself to be more worthy, All Might would change his mind and name him his successor. But in reality, he ends up jeopardizing the relationship they already have.
86. somewhere down the road - The final deadline for Nighteye’s predictions passes, and All Might lives. He debates telling Izuku, as even though it would be a weight off the boy’s mind, he doesn’t want to jinx it. He will still die eventually after all.
87. Just For You - All Might has certain rules and boundaries for fan interactions that he completely ignores for Izuku.
88. if these walls could talk (their whispers would be maddening) - Montage of training accidents in a ‘cursed’ ua gym
89. If Only I Could... - Nighteye tells Mirio about One for All, including that he thinks he’s more deserving than Izuku and he plans to pressure him into giving it up. Mirio struggles with the knowledge that his mentor, someone he respected more than anything, only saw him as a replacement for All Might, meanwhile watching Izuku strain under the pressure of that mentor’s impossible expectations.
90. This is a Test Designed to Provoke an Emotional Response - shameless Blade Runner AU
91. Once and for All - Retelling of the Superman story “What’s So Funny About Truth, Justice, and the American Way?” with All Might. Some new heroes use much more aggressive and violent tactics against villains while also upstaging All Might. That, and there general approval from the public cause All Might to question his moral code.
92. Sitting In The Rain - Tsuyu likes to just sit out in the rain sometimes. Not do anything, just sit there. Some friends decide to join her.
93. At Sundown - Mysterious creatures start attacking ua every night. The gang works tirelessly during the day to find the cause and a solution, while defending their school and each other at night.
94. The 1000th time's the charm - Uraraka has been practicing a new move in secret but they just can’t get it right. She wants it to be perfect before showing it off. But one attempt gets her seriously hurt while training alone at night in one of the gyms, and she’s too hurt to get up to the phone to call for help.
95. Sunflower Seeds - All Might attempts to start a garden as a new hobby.
96. What It Means To Be Human - Sun god Toshi starts living among people.
97. Eyes on Me - All Might teaches Izuku some unarmed fighting moves to defend himself from bullies.
98. one remains - Izuku has developed all but one of the quirks he’s slated to, and he has no idea what it will be. Anxiety ensues.
99. Come Back Home - Izuku vanishes from campus and everyone assumes he was kidnapped, but in reality he ran away to try and clear his head after a depressive spiral. He goes by train as far away as he can until he comes to his senses and calls the others.
100. I Won - Izuku accidentally managed to kill Shigaraki during a skirmish, and while everyone around him praises his heroics, he struggles to deal with the fact that he killed someone.
101. Ivory Tower - All Might grapples with how much izuku suffered as a quirkless person, how he could have done more for quirkless rights in his time as a hero, and how now people may not care as much because he’s retired.
Reminder to credit me if you use any of these prompts, and a special thanks to everyone who submitted titles!
#mha#bnha#mha prompts#bnha prompts#mha fanfiction#bnha fanfiction#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#dad might#all might#toshinori yagi#midoriya izuku#deku#bakugou katsuki#aconstantstateoffanfiction
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Julianne Hough Is (maybe) a Thing (October 2009 - January 2010)
So Taylor and Julianne had interacted before this point. Taylor and Kellie and Julianne had hosted something together earlier, and Julianne was on Dance Wars back when Liz was, but Julianne’s presence in Taylor’s life ramps up a TON for this very brief period of time. Julianne was 21 and Taylor was 18 (slightly larger age gap than TayLiz).
The important thing about JH’s presence in Taylor’s life for this period of time, however, is that Julianne is out as “not straight,” and is the only woman possibly romantically connected to Taylor to have come out like this -- unless you could Dianna with #Shirtgate and/or think Cara Delevingne and Taylor have hooked up at some point. So, let’s keep this in mind moving forward. However, JH is also incredibly racist and even did blackface at one point, so we do not stan and are not shipping this.
24 October 2009 - Taylor and JH paint each other for Katy Perry’s birthday party. Taylor maybe gives JH a blue boob grab and JH paints her initials onto Taylor’s dress. This is the evidence most people point to as to something happening with them during the “Lost Years.” Is it a smoking gun? No, but it’s definitely interesting.
I’m divided into two camps of belief on Taylor’s relationship with JH: either they were hooking up, or JH was just a big gay mentor/friend figure for Taylor. I’ve put the evidence of their interactions below, so you can try to figure it out with me:
25 October 2009 - JH and Taylor tweet at each other a bunch about the party.
Taylor Squared also attend a hockey game together.
27 October 2009 - Taylor and Selena have dinner. JH crashes. She tweets at Taylor then invites her to the “MJ premiere.” Taylor tweets about being chased by the paps, presumably because she was hanging out publicly with Selena and JH.
That night, Liz and Taylor perform together on Dancing With the Stars:
28 October 2009 - Taylor Squared go shopping and have a dinner date. They also take these obviously staged car photos.
(The lens has to have been on the hood of the car or something. There’s no way they didn’t notice the camera).
29 October 2009 - Taylor films the Roomies Sketch for SNL. If you haven’t go seen it yet, go WATCH IT RIGHT NOW. It is the start of all of the Gaylor Swift rumors (which we’ll get to later).
youtube
Considering how Taylor reacted when Liz got sick, and the fact that a lot of SNL sketches are based on jokes about the guest’s life/work, etc., I’m thinking this sketch was possibly about tour roommates TayLiz. But if that doesn’t sell you on it, maybe this gif comparison will:
1 November 2009 - Taylor and Liz go to Paramore concert in Nashville. They dance together to the songs “Misery Business” and “That’s What You Get.” Very girlfriend-y.
7 November 2009 - Taylor hosts Saturday Night Live and the Roomies Sketch airs.
Immediately after the Roomies Sketch airs, people flood After Ellen (a lesbian forum site -- think the L Chat but earlier) with gossip about Taylor being gay. Unfortunately, the original screenshot does not exist, but here’s someone on the L Chat talking about what happened that night:
Now while, once again, I hope all that stuff with Emily didn’t actually happen, for Taylor’s sake, it is really intriguing that the possibly-TayLiz-based Roomies sketch is the start of all of Taylor’s gay rumors.
11 November 2009 - CMT Awards. Taylor performs and wins an award. JH congratulates her on it with a tweet.
The secret message for Story of Us is “CMT Awards.” At the CMT awards in 2009, Taylor was separated from the band, so if TayLiz was having a hard time, (possibly due to JH jealousy, maybe because they hadn’t seen each other that much since tour ended) this would fit the line “standing alone in a crowded room and we’re not speaking.” Liz had retweeted Taylor about SNL earlier this week, though, so they may have been on good terms and this is not the CMT Awards that the linter note refers to. Or the liner notes are all lies. Who knows?
“Now I’m standing alone in a crowded room and we’re not speaking”????
12 November 2009 - JH and Taylor have a movie night together.
16 November 2009 - Taylor leaves for the Fearless tour in London. JH tweets at her to “have fun.”
18 November 2009 - TayLiz are papped in London returning to their hotel at midnight. (The London paps LOVE Taylor around this period of time, so a lot of the best TayLiz photos come from when they’re in London).
20 November 2009 - Liz tweets that she loves London. Taylor and Co are specifically in London for the Fearless tour, and TayLiz seem to be most “on” when they’re touring together. Perhaps that’s why she’s so excited to be in London...
21 November 2009 - Taylor and Liz go shopping and get lunch with Caitlin and Andrea at Portobello Market.
23-24 November 2009 - Fearless in London. The tour goes on break for the holidays after this.
December 2009 - Taylor and Taylor “break up”.
9 December 2009 Taylor goes on an ice cream date with Emma Stone in New York after connecting over email (note that this is the same story she tells about who she wrote Enchanted about -- connecting over e-mail and then meeting in person in NYC). So as much as I’d like to give Enchanted to Liz, it fits better with Emma.
What this implies to me is that whatever was going on with JH wasn’t that serious, if Enchanted is indeed about Emma and Taylor went and got ice cream because she was trying to pursue something with her. Or nothing was going on at all and JH was just some big gay mentor. Or even just a friend.
10 December 2009 - Taylor tweets about liking the song I Know About You by Dashboard Confessional that has a bunch of lyrical parallels to cardigan. Here’s a few choice ones:
It’s a shame, I know
But it all shakes out real slow
When the forays of your weekend
Hang like smoke on your clothes
11 December 2009 - TayLiz and Caitlin go shopping together in NYC
13 December 2009 - Taylor’s 20th Birthday. Her backup dancer, Brandon, comes out at her party (something that’s interesting because he notes that it was while touring with her that he’d found a queer community):
The first time Stansell came out publicly was at Taylor Swift’s birthday party 10 years ago. “I was dancing on Taylor Swift’s Fearless tour,” says Stansell, 33. He was also juggling his studies as a senior at the conservative Belmont College in Nashville. He wasn’t out there, and he wasn’t out to his conservative parents. But he had found a support system for the first time. “I had queer friends in my life,” he says. “And I had a boyfriend.”
To me, this suggests that there were multiple queer people on tour at the time, and Taylor and Liz may have been two of them. However, it’s also possible that he had just found a queer community within Nashville, but the fact that the quote goes straight from “I was touring with Taylor” to “I had queer friends” implies to me some sort of connection between the two.
Liz tweets Happy Birthday at Taylor:
24 December 2009 - Taylor and JH are caught by a fan shopping together at Walmart:
31 December 2009 - Taylor spends NYE going to the spa with Julianne, going to dinner with Hayley Williams and then goes to her brother’s NYE party.
2 January 2010 - Liz tweets the lyrics to John Mayer’s Heartbreak Warfare
Maybe Liz just likes the song. But I think it’s interesting considering Taylor seems to be out and about with another woman after a whole summer of them being Roomies. I also think it’s intriguing that one of Liz’s favorite nicknames for Taylor is “Tay,” which just happens to be the secret message of Back to December... Did something go wrong between TayLiz at the end of December? Or is the song really for Taylor Lautner, despite the obvious stuntiness of that relationship?
6 January 2010 - Liz congratulates Taylor on something and says she “missed our family,” implying they haven’t seen each other since touring in London together.
9 January 2010 - TayLiz attend a housewarming party together.
19 January 2010 - TayLiz and Caitlin hang out.
23 January 2010 - TayLiz and Caitlin get on a plane to get back on tour.
25 January 2010 - Taylor films something with The Agency and there are a lot of laughs.
27 January 2010 - Taylor and JH attend the same cancer charity event together,
This is the last time we see Taylor and JH together for a long while, and judging by the way Taylor seems to be deliberately avoiding touching JH’s bare back in that last hug, if they had anything, it’s over by this point. Taylor is single and ready to mingle mope about it for a few months.
CONCLUSION: So, did Taylor and JH happen? Maybe. Maybe not. On one hand, I want to believe it did, since, as stated previously, JH is the only out queer woman that Taylor has rumors with.
The SNL Roomies sketch certainly reads to me as being about TayLiz being roomies on tour, and so the fact that all of Taylor’s gay rumors started here certainly makes a case for TayLiz having been doing something during the first half of the Fearless tour. However, they seem to have drifted apart a bit during the winter. Could this be due to JH? Or something else entirely? Could JH have just been a gay mentor? Who knows for sure. However, something must’ve caused TayLiz to cool down because what’s next is:
Single Taylor and The Gay Australia Trip (February 2010)
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Miah’s 1K Celebration
so...
welcome to the mess that is my 1k celebration cause i’m unable to make simple choices and can’t stand the thought of letting people down
as you can see, i’m perfectly normal
the literal 1005 people following me would disagree on that but heyyy details
so anyway
one thousand
one bloody thousand people following me
my inicial reaction is whyyyy??? i’m just a bisexual disaster who sometimes writes a half decent fanfic but you deemed me worthy of your follow?
then i started crying cause yk
but bottomline is, i love you all, you’re the bestest people in the whole entire world, so i’m gonna make both a sleepover and a writing challenge
sleepover cause i like answering questions
writing challenge cause it gives me a chance to show you all other artists and discover other artists myself cause we all need them and they deserve more recognition
special shoutout to my mutuals who i’ll tag at the end for always being there for me and supporting me through every high and every low, y’all are the real heroes here
BUT ANYWAY, ONTO THE CELEBRATION PART, WHICH FINDS ITSELF UNDER THE CUT OTHERWISE IT’D BE TOO BIG TO PROPERLY REBLOG (i tend to ramble a bit, but you already knew that)
Starts: December 11th 2020
Ends: December 20th 2020
Who can participate: everyone, anon or not! no need to be following me either
send me asks for:
✨ my opinion on...
🌻 cast my mutuals as...
🎵 i'll put my playlist on shuffle and give you a song
🍉 random fact about me
🦔 what's my favorite...
🍀 i'll give you advice (or just listen to you rant, if you want)
💬 last text [insert person] sent me
💌 handwritten letter
🎬 movie rec
📖 fic or blog rec
📘 inspiration behind [insert fic name], how i came up with it or if you have questions about it
🖋 line from one of my WIPs (tell me if you want fluff or angst, i won't tell you the pairing or anything, that's no fun)
💋 kiss, date, marry [insert people]
🎤 give me a song an i'll do a mini cover of it (it will be 1min long tops cause that's all tumblr can take lmao)
📷 random picture from my camera roll (you can request a theme if you want, like pictures from my childhood or awkward pics or something)
Rules:
• Open to anyone (don't have to be following me)
• Send me a DM or ask with the prompt(s) you want (two people tops per work) and who you're writing about
• Smut is allowed but make sure to put it in the warnings
• I will accept works for any Marvel character or cast member, part of the Holland clan, 1D member or affiliated, Teen Wolf characters or cast member, Maze Runner character or cast member
• Can be reader inserts or not, but please specify it in your DM/ask too
• Tag me when you're done
• All works will be rebloged under #Miah's 1k writing challenge and put in a masterlist that will be specifically created for this writing challenge
Starts: December 11th 2020
Ends: January 11th 2020
Prompt list:
1. “Is that my shirt?” “You mean our shirt?”
2. “Home stopped being a place when you entered my life.”
3. “Stop moving and let me braid your hair.”
4. “Could you say that again?” “Were you not listening?” “No I was, I just like hearing your voice.”
5. “Can you just please hold me?”
6. “You come here often?” “Well considering I work here, yes.”
7. “Can I stay here tonight?”
8. “You’re really warm.”
9. “I’ve been in-love with you since we were kids.”
10. “Why are you wearing my sweater?” “Because it smells like you.”
11. “You are crushing me right now.”
12. “Darling I love you and all, but please get out of my kitchen.”
13. "I leave you alone for five minutes and this happens."
14. "I didn't fall. The floor looked lonely so I wanted to hug it." "Then why are you crying?" "It was an emotional reunion."
15. "There's no such thing as too many fairy lights."
16. “I’m leaving.” “Of course you are, that’s all you know how to do.”
17. “I love you.” “No you don’t”
18. “Any other lies left to tell me?”
19. “I miss the old you.”
20. “What happened to their happily ever after?” “Not all love stories get a happily ever after, sometimes it’s just once upon a time.”
21. “Lie to me. I don’t care what you say, just lie to me. Make me feel okay again.”
22. “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t leave.”
23. "It's okay. It's not your fault that I couldn't be enough."
24. "Please don't leave me."
25. "You have the emotional range of a teaspoon."
26. "Will you shut up for once in your life?"
27. "This isn't about us."
28. "I will shove a christmas tree so far up your ass that when you open your mouth we'll see the fairy lights."
29. "I'm not crying, my eyes are sweating"
30. "Is that blood?" "Yes, but it's not mine." "Is that supposed to make it better?"
31. "I’ll drink to that.” “You drink to everything.” “Cheers!”
32. “Why is arson always your first answer?”
33. "What are you doing?" "What does it look like I'm doing?"
34. "I can explain!" "Then explain." "Okay, I can't explain."
35. "Get out of here with your facts. Just because you're accurate does not mean you're interesting."
36. "How many hearts did you break while trying to keep yours intact?"
37. "I know everything. It's in the job description."
38. "One more word out of you and I'll rip your throat out with my teeth."
39. "Do you listen to girl in red?"
40. "Is that code for something or am I just paranoid?"
41. "With how things have been going, I might as well start working at a circus."
42. "I love (him/her/them)." "Then why did you give up?" "Cause (he/she/they) deserved better."
43. "I want to ask but something tells me the answer will be more disturbing than anything I can think of."
44. "Do you think he's... *flicks wrist*?"
45. "Do I look like an idiot to you?" "Do you want me to answer that honestly or politely?"
46. "Just how clumsy are you?"
47. "So... the weather?"
48. "Just leave."
49. "Don't you fucking dare!"
50. "You don't have to talk right now. But whenever you're ready, if you're ever ready, I'll be here to listen."
tagging and complimenting my amazing mutuals cause y’all deserve it
@parkersbliss thank you for marrying me, first of all, and for being the most amazing wife one could ask. i wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you and i will never stop ebing thankful for your existence
@peterspideyy thank you for listening to my rants along with grace and supporting me during all my simping, you’re the sweetest thing existing since powdered sugar
@theamazingtomholland thank you for always putting a smile on my face, reminding me that i’m loved everyday and just being you, cause it’s the best thing you could be
@lozzypoz321 thank you for listening to me rant abt my fics and how much i hate writing and then motivating me to write again or do basic things like get out of bed lmao (we still have the best taste in music)
@everything-is-alrightt kenzie lovely, thank you for being the pure little ball of unfiltered joy that you are cause even thinking about you and the jump shit your brothers get up to makes me smile like crazy, you’re amazing and don’t you dare forget it
@spider-trash thank you for being my brother, going alon with my ridiculous schemes for corrupting posie and making me laugh out loud every time you come up with something even worse, you’re the coolest bro i could ask for
and finally, thank you @fallinfortom for inspiring me to write in the first place, being an amazing mum to us, an actual good role model for me to have and for your random appearances in my dreams and the fun english teacher who makes us read tom holland fics instead of english literature. you’re amazing and i’m incredibly thankful to know you
love you all to the ends of the universe and back again, Miah
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42: top 3s
1: Top 3 ice cream flavors - classic vanilla, birthday cake/birthday batter, bubblegum
2: Top 3 Disney Movies - Mulan, Onward, Soul (but this changes frequently lol)
3: Top 3 vacation destinations - I've never been outside of my home country so I'll say my top 3 DREAM destinations: NYC, Hawaii, a random countryside in either France or the UK
4: Top 3 places to shop - Dynamite, Sephora, Winners/Homesense
5: Top 3 subjects of study/classes to take - English/anything creative writing related, Interior Decorating/Design, Communications?
6: Top 3 make up products - YSL Touche Eclat Foundation, literally any Mac Lipstick but it has to be matte, & Fenty Beauty contour stick
7: Top 3 music artists - Taylor Swift - Of Monsters and Men - The Lumineers
8: Top 3 spices/herbs - Cinnamon - Nutmeg (literally tastes like autumn) - Paprika
9: Top 3 drinks - Diet Coke - Hot Chocolate - Vanilla Bean Frappe
10: Top 3 apps to use - Instagram - Pinterest -iBooks
11: Top 3 months of the year - May, October, December
12: Top 3 clothing items - My black/white turtle neck, high waisted jeans, plaid blazer
13: Top 3 binge perfect tv shows - Bones, Supernatural, Brooklyn Nine Nine
14: Top 3 romantic dates - (I've never been on a date but if I had, it would be this) Evening walk, late night drive, late night coffee date (tbh anything at night feels romantic)
15: Top 3 kinds of flower - Water lilies, cherry blossoms, roses
16: Top 3 christmas movies - A Christmas Carol (2009), Home Alone, The Polar Express
17: Top 3 OTPs - Nesta and Cassian from ACOTAR series by SJM, Manon and Dorian from Throne of Glass series by SJM, Casteel and Poppy from From Blood and Ash series by JLM.
18: Top 3 quotes to describe your life - "I write not to find, but to leave" by Scherezade Siobhan - "I want to be myself again. I want to be six. I want to stop knowing everything I know" by Catherynne M. Valente - "The truth is, I pretend to be a cynic, but I am really a dreamer who is terrified of wanting something she may never get" by Joanna Hoffman.
19: Top 3 characteristics you love about yourself - my kindness bc it's not surface level kindness, but actually something deeply rooted within me - my resilience even tho sometimes it doesn't feel like resilience - my loyalty bc it is a hard as steel kind of loyalty
20: Top 3 kinds of candy - Maltesers, Kit kats, smarties
21: Top 3 ways to exercise/ be active - Walking, dancing, mowing the lawn/shoveling the sidewalk
22: Top 3 spirit animals - wolf, hummingbird, tiger (i googled it bc i didn't know and i was scared it was a joke but)
23: Top 3 petnames - I like 'lovebug', 'love', 'sweetheart'
24: Top 3 books read outside of school - The Hating Game by Sally Thorne, A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J Maas but viewers discretion is advised, Crush by Richard Siken
25: Top 3 most used websites - Youtube, Tumblr, Pinterest
26: Top 3 people you last texted - my mom, my bestie megan, and my sister bc they're the only people i text...
27: Top 3 hashtags you use - the only time i use hashtags is if i'm trying to promote some of my writing so I'll usually use writingcommunity, writersonig, poetryonig lol
28: Top 3 instagram accounts you follow - Trista Mateer, Griefmother, obviously taylor swift
29: Top 3 guilty pleasures - buzzfeed quizzes, early 2000s music, romance novels
30: Top 3 summer activities - Going to the zoo, long evening walks, campfires and s'mores
31: Top 3 things to draw/doodle - hearts, flowers, random swirls bc it's the only thing i can doodle...
32: Top 3 aesthetics - cityscape aesthetic, autumn aesthetic, rustic aesthetic
33: Top 3 things you'd buy if you gained three million dollars - a new car, a condo, another cat
34: Top 3 ways to treat yourself - facial, a large bag of maltesers, buying the makeup i really want but have been putting off
35: Top 3 celebrity crushes - Evan Peters, Matthew Daddario, henry cavill
36: Top 3 books from your childhood - Love You Forever by Robert Munsch, The Big Friendly Giant by Roald Dahl, and Madeline by Ludwig Bemelmens
37: Top 3 accents to hear - Australian, super poshy british accent, new zealand accent
38: Top 3 scents - Fresh rain, vanilla, sweet cinnamon pumpkin from bath and body works
39: Top 3 "Friends" quotes - "WE WERE ON A BREAK" -Ross, "Guess things were just going too well for me" -also ross, and "it's so exhausting waiting for death" - phoebe
40: Top 3 cupcake flavors - tbh I haven't tried that many cupcakes so your typical vanilla, chocolate, and Pink Lady Cupcake from Babycakes Cupcakery
41: Top 3 fruits - Pomegranates, Strawberries, Raspberries
42: Top 3 places you've had amazing pizza from - Pizzahut, Dominos, Pizza73
43: Top 3 sports teams to watch - i don't
44: Top 3 crayola colors - uh, i guess red, purple, and pink??
45: Top 3 things you hope to accomplish in college - Certificates/Degrees in Copyediting and Creative Writing, and I think simply just deeper critical thinking skills when it comes to writing and books
46: Top 3 fanfictions you've read - I read more books than fanfics, I've read a couple on tumblr but don't remember the names sorry :/
47: Top 3 people you miss right now - my dad, my best friend bc she's in vancouver, taylor swift bc she's not on tumblr anymore rip
48: Top 3 fears - Failure, Loss, not achieving anything in life/not reaching my full potential
49: Top 3 favorite literary devices - Foreshadowing is always god tier, cliffhangers although evil i love those too, symbolism
50: Top 3 pet peeves - People dragging their shoes on the floor when they walk, when you tell someone your fav hobby/music artist/interest and they immediately go 'oh I hate X!', and people who go 'you're so quiet!!!' but in a way that draws in more attention and/or makes me feel more uncomfortable like i would literally rather die
51: Top 3 physical things you find attractive - Hands, nice hair, defined jawlines
52: Top 3 bad habits - Nailbiting, picking at my blemishes oops, lip biting
53: Top 3 pets you've had/wish to have - Cats bc they complete me, I've always wanted a Samoyed, and I've always wanted a turtle
54: Top 3 types of foreign food - Chicken Chow Mein, deep fried shrimp, japanese chicken wings
55: Top 3 things you want to say to someone in your lifetime - 'I quit', 'I love you', 'you changed my life'
56: Top 3 dog breeds - Samoyed, german shepherds, collies
57: Top 3 cheesy romance movies - You've Got Mail, How To Lose a Guy In 10 Days, 10 Things I Hate About You
58: Top 3 languages you speak/wish to speak - French, Sign, and maybe Japanese?
59: Top 3 series (book, movie, television) - The Cruel Prince series by Holly Black, A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Maas (but literally only for Cassian and Nesta), From Blood and Ash by Jennifer L Armentrout
60: Top 3 pizza toppings - Mushrooms, alfredo sauce, pineapple
61: Top 3 youtubers you're subscribed to - Game Grumps, Charlotte Dobre, Megan Batoon
62: Top 3 tattoo / piercing ideas - I want to get a tattoo on my wrist of the last thing my dad ever wrote me, a hummingbird tattoo right next to it, and then a cross on my index finger
63: Top 3 awards you want to win - National Book Awards, Nobel Prize, and maybe even Goodreads Choice Awards lol
64: Top 3 emojis - Laugh/Crying emoji, the please sir emoji that kinda gives off those puss n boots eyes, and the stars emoji
65: Top 3 cars you dream of owning - 1970s Chev Impala, tbh a cute little Hyundai Venue, and maaaaybe the 1964 ferarri 250 gt luso (idk if that name was totally right but i had to do tons of googling to find it. i don't know a lot about cars and i don't really have a top 3 lol)
66: Top 3 authors - Right now I'm really into Sarah J Maas, Sally Thorne, and Holly Black maybe?
67: Top 3 historical figures - Jesus, Anne Frank, Vincent Van Gogh
68: Top 3 baby names - Ryder, Leila, Gracie
69: Top 3 DIYs - Candles, refurnishing old furniture (i.e. my mom and i painted our wooden garbage can), and really just any type of autumn diy
70: Top 3 smoothie combos/flavors - Strawberry/Banana, Mango, Strawberry-Mango
71: Top 3 songs of this month - Happier Than Ever by Billie Eilish, Biblical by Calum Scott, and Visiting Hours by Ed Sheeran
72: Top 3 questions of this post you want to be asked - I did them all bc I made it a survey instead of an ask meme ;)
73: Top 3 villains - Regina/The Evil Queen from Once Upon a Time, Cruella De Vil, and Moriarty from Sherlock
74: Top 3 Cities you want to see - Montreal, NYC, Vancouver (honorable mention: LA)
75: Top 3 recipes you want to try - different kind of salad and/or burger bowls, Stuffed bell peppers, and homemade lemon loaf
76: Top 3 dream jobs - Bestselling author, the person who runs a companies social media accounts, youtuber/blogger
77: Top 3 lucky items - tbh don't have one
78: Top 3 traditions you have - Christmas Eve Service and if I don't go to that at least incorporating reading the christmas story on christmas day or eve, idk if this counts as tradition but going to the corn maze every fall, and whenever it's easter/christmas/thanksgiving we always have a big meal w/ family
79: Top 3 things you miss about being a kid - reckless abandon, dreaming about growing up with hopefulness and no dashed hopes, experiencing holidays like halloween and christmas as a kid
80: Top 3 harry potter characters - I've never read or watched Harry Potter rip (ok well i saw the first and second (and maybe third?) movie in the sixth grade I think) but I think I really liked Hermoine, Harry obviously and Dobby
81: Top 3 lies you were told - i don't have 3, but this one has a story but basically when my sister and i were in elementary school my sister got hit by a car and so the insurance thing was that she would recieve 10k when she was 18 and as a child i thought that was unfair so my dad told me that my sister had to split it with me when we were 18 lmao obviously that didn't happen (i think i realized that wasn't true in middle school)
82: Top 3 pictures in your camera roll right now - Pictures of my cat, one of my sister in a hilarious filter, and a picture of my rocking my TS merch
83: Top 3 turn ons - Kindness, defined jawline, easy going
84: Top 3 turn offs - arrogance, unkempt, super loud and obnoxious
85: Top 3 magazines/news papers/ journals to read - I don't read much of those so I'll tell you some sites I love for writing purpose's: there's Wellstoried, justwriterlythings, springhole.net (which is filled with generators if you're stuck and also tons of infomation and advice)
86: Top 3 things you wish you had known earlier - that toad in Mario Party was wearing a mushroom hat and that it is actually not his head, that immaculate means 'clean' before i misused that word like several times over the years, and that the one turn i always take on my way to work where i thought everyone didn't know how to drive was actually bc i didn't have the right of way rip me
87: Top 3 spongebob episodes - the one episode where spongebob and patrick find a ghost ship, that one episode where they form a bikini bottom band and perform it at a football game in a little fish tank, and the one episode where squidward has his first snowball fight
88: Top 3 places to be in the world - I'd love to be in NYC, Montreal, or Hawaii
89: Top 3 things you'd do differently - I would not have applied for RDC, similarly I should have just paid the 500 dollars to the one certificate program I wanted to do instead of overthinking it, and I wish I wouldn't have ended a friendship the way I did
90: Top 3 TV shows from your childhood - Spongebob Squarepants, That's So Raven, and Hannah Montana
91: Top 3 meals you love - Turkey Burgers, Chilli, and Instant Pot Chicken Tortilla Soup
92: Top 3 kinds of tea - i don't drink tea
93: Top 3 embarrassing moments - one time in sixth grade I tripped and fell right on my face in front of my crush, this other time like a couple years ago i opened the door to my car and only realized much too late while i was staring at this random family that it was not my car, and when i went to the gas station to get gas and couldn't get my gas lid on my car opened and this guy had to help me which was already embarrassing enough but then the gas pump wouldn't work so i had to go inside to pay just to realize i forgot my wallet and had to shamefully walk back to my car and then run back inside the convenience store and then pay and then walk back to my car and finally fill my tank.
94: Top 3 holidays to celebrate - Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving
95: Top 3 things to do in the rain - have an existential crisis, pretend you're in a music video, walk through puddles like you're six again
96: Top 3 things to do in the snow - Sledding, Build a snowman, shovel it even tho you don't want to
97: Top 3 items you can't leave the house w/o - phone, keys, wallet
98: Top 3 movies you'd like to see - Jurassic World 3, Hotel Transylvania: Transformania bc i'm a child, and the animation of the addams family
99: Top 3 art mediums - Writing fiction/poetry, painting, music
100: Top 3 museums you've been to - Royal Tyrell Museum, Canadian History one in edmonton lol, and heritage park in calgary
101: Top 3 school memories - Middle school dances when the popular kids would grind to the song "Low" which was always an interesting experience, in the twelfth grade at winter formal when we all shouted "SHUT UP AND DANCE!" at the same time when they played Shut Up and Dance, and the day i left
102: Top 3 things you don't/Won't miss - School, my sisters ex, 2016 bc she was a rough year yikes
103: Top 3 pick up lines - "My name is Will. God's Will.", "I'd like to take you to the movies but they don't like you bring your own snacks", "are you from tennessee bc you're the only 10 i see"
104: Top 3 sports to watch - none of them
105: Top 3 taylor swift songs - all too well - exile - coney island
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Ishida’s Q&A comments from YJ compilation, Part 3
More recommendations from Ishida, plus an unexpected comment about/from Togashi!
For anyone who doesn’t know about the relevant Questions to Ishida contest, please read here. You can start from Part 1 here.
The recent set of zakki:re and interview translations take a lot of time and effort, so if you enjoyed it please leave a like or reblog. Thank you!
2012 (cont.)
(Editor’s note: The Table of Contents (ToC) comments from 2011-12 consist of the answer to the question plus a brief statement of what’s happening in their lives.
No. 32
Tanabata is coming soon, but do you have an event that you enjoy that comes around once a year?
My birthday, which is on December 28. It's not celebrated much since it's during winter vacation.
It's celebrated now ever since Tokyo Ghoul was serialized. Thank you.
No. 33
Do you recall a moment when you were proud of yourself?
In junior high when I high-jumped 155 cm, I felt like I did my best compared to those who weren't in any clubs.
That's pretty high.
No. 34
It’s the London Olympics. Please share with us the event or athlete you're most looking forward to!!
[On break.]
I like artistic gymnastics. Also I wasn't taking a break.
No. 35
Please share with us an anecdote related to pets!!
I had a hamster. Its name was Fattie. I'm late, but thank you for your hard work, Saruwatari-sensei.
I was a fattie too at the time.
[T/N: Referring to the mangaka Saruwatari Tetsuya who finished his longest running series "Tough" roughly around this time.]
No. 36
Summer is buzzing around with bugs!! Please share with us an anecdote related to bugs that happened during summer break.
I lived together with a giant spider for a while. I'm going to buy a whole bunch of comedy DVDs.
I had bugs often show up in my room during my time in Tokyo.
No. 37-38
Give us a recommendation for a summer song!!
TK from Ling Tosite Sigure's album was really cool. Tokyo Jungle is simple but at the same time interesting.
It's TK-”san" damn it!! Death to you!
[T/N: Referring to TK’s first album “flowering” based on the date. Tokyo Jungle is a PS3 game.]
No. 39
Please tell us a weakness of yours that you secretly but really want to fix!!
I want to live a normal life, but it's more difficult than I expected. I was moved by Ishikawa-san fighting back with all her strength in table tennis.
"Being late.” I want to spend the rest of my life fixing that.
[T/N: Probably referring to one of Ishikawa Kasumi’s semi-final/bronze medal matches during the 2012 Olympics.]
No. 40
If you have a website you want to recommend please tell us!!
These days I've only had time to look at Yahoo! News. I bought a Wii so I can play Smash Bros.
Not any different from today.
No. 41
What's an impressive full-time/part-time job you've experienced outside of being a mangaka? Also, what kind of job did you want to do a long time ago?
I flipped the patties at Mos Burger. I would like to teach manga at school.
I don't want to teach manga at school. I'd rather flip the patties.
No. 42
Please tell us any numbers you're unintentionally conscious of!!
The number 4. The number of times that I'd look at a clock and it'd say 4:44 was so high that I decided it’d be my lucky number.
It does happen every so often.
No. 43
Are there any instruments you're good at, or would like to play?
I play the piano occasionally. I had a meeting at Ringer Hut for 8 hours.
Glad the meeting went well.
No. 44
Please list one person who you think is a genius!
Togashi Yoshihiro-sensei, Miura Kentarou-sensei, Umino Chica-sensei, Miyazaki Hayao-san and George Lucas.
Truth.
[T/N: The creators of Hunter x Hunter/Yu Yu Hakusho, Berserk, Honey and Clover/March Comes In Like A Lion, Studio Ghibli, and Star Wars respectively. Truth indeed.]
No. 45
Art Autumn has arrived!! Any artists or art you recommend?
Cirque du Soleil has truly stolen my heart. Volume 4 is currently on sale. I'm beyond happy to see Togashi-sensei's comment on the obi...
I still say that. I was really happy about the comment on the obi. It was on the Tsukiyama cover.
[T/N: Togashi’s comment said, 「混色たちの鮮やかで醜いお話がここに在ります。」 “Here lies an unsightly story with the vividness of a motley of colours.” ]
No. 46
It's Appetite Autumn! What's your favourite fast food!?
Lawson's 2-colour jelly is delicious. I'm addicted to Hirayama Yumeaki.
It's Hirayama Yumeaki-"san", goddammit!! Perish.
[T/N: Hirayama is a writer and director known for his horror stories like “The Diner”.]
No. 47
It's Reader Autumn! Please share with us any memorable novels, children's books, or picture books you read in your childhood!
I read Count Dracula at my elementary school library, I was scared and dreamed of it a lot. Now I love that kind of stuff.
Now I'm not really into that stuff anymore.
No. 48
"I can't die until I get to meet this person!!" Please tell us who this person to you is.
Matsuko Deluxe-san. I bought Resident Evil 6. I'm looking forward to playing it.
I want to meet him...but do I really? Though I do like him.
No. 49
What holiday resort do you want to go to even if you have to take a bullet train to get there?
I want to show my face at my parents’ house. I met the editor-in-chief and the designer Shimada. I had a very good time.
Now it’s because no one’s there.
No. 50
What's your favourite alcoholic drink? For those who don't drink, please share with us your favourite beverage.
Yuzu Hachimitsu. I went to karaoke with the staff members. My assistant's rendition of "Magical DoReMi" sounded like it was sung by a mosquito.
Darjeeling Cooler, these days. I remember, it was Ide-san.
No. 51
Please share with us the person/character who you thought was shockingly handsome!
Ashitaka from Princess Mononoke. He's a natural womanizer.
I wonder if he's a shy boy when he's riding together [with San].
No. 52
Checking here to see if you follow the world news!!
I skim Yahoo! News. I bought Animal Crossing. The name of my village is Ishi Village.
Nothing's changed here too!
No. 53
What is a food that is a must for warming you up during the cold season?
I've never eaten convenience store oden so I'd like to buy some to try. I liked the mochi kinchaku at home.
I got to eat the convenience store oden. It was delicious.
previous || next
#Tokyo Ghoul#zakki:re#Ishida Sui#Ishida Q&A#Translations#my translations#hot damn that togashi comment on the obi#thank god for this compilation or else it would've been forgotten
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Finding Life- Declan Buchanan’s Timeline Playlist
Night by Ludivico Einaudi- (No Lyrics)
My Wish For You by Rascal Flatts- I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,/ And each road leads you where you wanna go,/ And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,/ I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
Weak and Powerless by A Perfect Circle- “Tilling my own grave to keep me level/ Jam another dragon down the hole/ Digging to the rhythm and the echo of a solitary siren/ One that pushes me along and leaves me so/ Desperate and ravenous/ I’m so weak and powerless over you.”
Stand in the Rain by Superchick- She never slows down./ She doesn't know why/ but she knows that when she's all alone,/ feels like its all coming down
Animal I have Become by Three Days Grace- Somebody help me tame this animal I have become/ And we believe it’s not the real me/ Somebody help me tame this animal
The Facade Fades by LYCIA- Everything fades/ As i decline/ This facade burns away/ And behind it all lies nothing but emptiness and pain
The Longer I Run by Peter Bradley Adams- The longer I run/ Then the less that I find/ Sellin my soul for a nickel and dime/ Breakin my heart to keep singing these rhymes/ And losin again
Waking Light by Beck- Waking light, it grew from the shadow/ Brace yourself to the morning low/ Night is gone, long way turning/ You’ve waited long enough to know
Whatever It Takes by Imagine Dragons- Whatever it takes/ ‘Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins/ I do whatever it takes/ 'Cause I love how it feels when I break the chains/ Whatever it takes
Rise Up by Andra Day- And I’ll rise up/ I’ll rise like the day/ I’ll rise up/ I’ll rise unafraid
idontwannabeyouanymore by Billie Eilish- Don’t be that way/ Fall apart twice a day/ i just wish you could feel what you say/ Show, never tell/ But I know you too well/ Got a mood that you wish you could sell
My Own Worst Enemy by Robert Pettersson- Stick to my guns and I watch the darkness fill the void/ am I starting to become what I was sent here to destroy/ in the mirror I see you staring back at me/ Each time the hatred grows I forget which side I’m on/ is it simply my own shadow I’ve been chasing all along/ in the mirror I see you staring back at me
Why by Rascal Flatts- You must've a been in a place so dark, couldn't feel the light/ Reachin' for you through that stormy cloud/ Now here we are gathered in our little home town/ This can't be the way you meant to draw a crowd
Astronaut by Simple Plan- 'Cause tonight I'm feeling like an astronaut/ Sending SOS from this tiny box/ And I lost all signal when I lifted off/ Now I'm stuck out here and the world forgot
Savin’ Me by Nickleback- Show me what it's like/ To be the last one standing/ And teach me wrong from right/ And I'll show you what I can be
Numb by Linkin Park- I'm tired of being what you want me to be/ Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface/ I don't know what you're expecting of me
Hurt by Johnny Cash- I wear this crown of thorns/ Upon my liars chair/ Full of broken thoughts/ I cannot repair
Hate by Common Children- I hate myself/ I hate myself/ The madness/ Of sadness/ The mixed words
Key for what event each song is attached to and why each song was chosen for those events under read more:
First, I chose Finding Life because Declan has felt like his whole life he is trying to almost find life for himself. I felt that was a great title for a playlist for the important moments of Declan’s life.
Declan is born (September 12,1986 )- I just like how this sounds. It feels a lot like Declan.
Siobhan Graham is born (Undated 1989)- Declan just wants his little sister to know how much he loves her.
Declan is kidnapped and taken to Stephen’s Farm (January 1993/ Age 7)- Weak and Powerless describes exactly how Declan feels about his situation with Zacharias and Sestra at the time.
Unknown to Declan, his mother commits suicide. (March 2004/ Age 18)- The first lyrics really describes how his mother felt before she committed suicide.
Declan murders Zacharias and Sestra Stephens and escapes the farm. He is immediately detained. (October 2004/ Age 18)- I like how angry this song is. It really talks about how Declan doesn’t know who he is after what the farm put him through. Could he be anything other than a trained killer?
Declan is pardoned thanks to the governor of Georgia at the time. In exchange, Declan agrees to take a settlement from the Stephens’ to never talk about what happened again. At the request of his father, Declan is put in a mental institution. (December 2004/ Age 18)- This song really typifies how Declan was feeling at that point. There was nothing but emptiness and pain for him as he sat along in the corner of the hospital waiting for therapists to pick him apart.
Declan gets his high school diploma. Then is let outside of hospital. Declan runs away and finds a shack to live in while selling plants that he grows. Spends the next few years drinking. (May 2007/ Age 20)- It’s at this time that Declan feels incredibly lost in his life. He’s just falling through life trying to find some sort of way of filling the void in his soul.
A rich guy buys the farm Declan was planting on. He offers Declan a job working there where he’ll pay for Declan’s school if Declan pulls his life together. (June 2008 /Age 20)- This is a new start for Declan. He looks to the new life worried, but hopeful for something good.
Declan graduates from college with a Bachelors in Agricultural Science. (January 2013/ Age 26)- Finally, Declan starts to feel successful in his life. Finally, Declan starts to see a direction for his life.
Declan is hired at a prestigious research center. (June 2013/ Age 26)- It’s at this point where Declan finally starts to feels like he’s creating a world for himself. Every day he rises up from all of his pain, and he created something despite all of that.
Declan is dragged into a court case. (September 2015/ Age 29)- Dragging Declan back into the world of the Stephens was one of the worst things to ever happen to Declan. He had put a lot of it behind him, but the reminder of the images and manipulation drove Declan to want to sink away from his skin.
Declan is officially reprimanded for his alcoholism for the first time. (December 2015/ Age 29)- This song sums up how he hates everything about himself, and some part of him wishes someone would come save him from himself.
Declan find out one of the kids that survived committed suicide. (March 2016/ Age 30)- It just perfectly illustrates how guilty he feels about someone he felt responsible for committing suicide.
Declan is officially reprimanded for his alcoholism the second time. (June 2016 / Age 30)- Emptiness had completely filled Declan at that point.
Declan is put on “Family Medical Leave” and told either to go to rehab or that he couldn’t return. Declan goes to six week rehab program. (January 2017/ Age 31)- He desperately wants to get his life together, but he feels so distant from everything. He feels like no one really sees him.
Declan returns back to work. (March 2017/ Age 31)- Despite getting clean, Declan continues to feel numb.
Declan is fired. (September 20, 2019/ Age 33)- He can’t pull it together, and he realizes he is his own destruction.
Declan moves back to Mirror Lake, Georgia. (September 29, 2019/ Age 33)- You get it. He hates himself.
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Reinventing Javert
An upcoming adaptation of Victor Hugo’s 19th century novel Les Misérables will be the most satisfying version yet, says star David Oyelowo, as he explains why taking the character of Javert beyond his portrayal as a one-one-dimensional villain was his most challenging role to date.
“If there’s something I’ve learned, it is you can never predict how anything you do is going to be received, as Victor Hugo will attest to,” David Oyelowo says with a smile. “But the thing I do know we’ve achieved is filling in a lot of the blanks that inevitably exist because you are trying to boil down a huge novel.”
Oyelowo is deconstructing his latest television role, which will see him tackle Javert, the police inspector and primary antagonist in Victor Hugo’s 19th century epic novel Les Misérables, in the forthcoming adaptation for UK public broadcaster the BBC and Masterpiece on PBS in the US.
The miniseries has been authored by period adaptation maven Andrew Davies (War & Peace, Pride & Prejudice) and sees Oyelowo face off against Dominic West’s protagonist Jean Valjean (pictured top alongside Oyelowo).
The subject of numerous recreations, the novel’s most recognisable reinventions are the long-running musical, which has now been a fixture on London’s West End for 33 years, and the 2012 Hollywood film helmed by The King’s Speech director Tom Hooper.
Oyelowo points out, however, that rather than treading the same ground, Davies’ six-hour series can go deeper into the book. “If it’s a film or a musical you’re distilling it down to, it’s too thin to be as satisfying as the book allows,” he says. “Six hours of television in the hands of Andrew Davies is a far more satisfying way to explore that story and understand these characters who intersect in ways that are genuinely universal – in terms of how we exist in the world now.
“What I love about the book is that at any given time I can identify with Javert, I can identify with Jean Valjean, I can identify with Fantine; and that needs time to not reduce them to archetypes. My hope is that people who see this version are really going to have a far greater context for what this story actually is.”
This is no more relevant than to his character, Javert. Oyelowo says the inspector is often portrayed as a “one-dimensional” villain with the sole function of hunting down the misdirected but ultimately good-at-heart Valjean.
“It became clear to me that there was so much more there than people may recognise from knowing the musical. Let’s face it, not enough people have read the book. That became the challenge and it was basically to understand why he pursues him,” he adds.
“What became apparent is that, at the time in which this thing is set, there’s a lot of friction between the classes, between people on the basis of socioeconomics, politics… and so that time required – and I’m not saying he is in any way what the world needs now – someone who operated in moral absolutes in order to bring any kind of order to that chaos. He’s a by-product of the time he was in. Therefore, hopefully, you don’t necessarily condone his actions but you understand them.”
The contradictions that exist in Javert are such that Oyelowo, who has depicted Martin Luther King Jr (Selma) and former Botswanan president Sir Seretse Goitsebeng Maphiri Khama (A United Kingdom) on the big screen, feels the role has proved “one of the most challenging” in his career, due to “the perception people have going in.”
“By and large, people have an opinion [of the character] – even people who haven’t seen the musical, read the book or know much about it. They have a sense, whether it’s a portrayal they’ve seen in a trailer, or a poster they’ve seen, so it’s a little bit like the challenge you have when you’re playing a historical figure. You know that what you have to do in order to do a portrayal that’s satisfying is to bring something revelatory, something that people didn’t know. If you’re just giving them what they already knew, it’s redundant. That was the challenge.”
Oyelowo is changing perceptions, and breaking new ground, from a different standpoint too. In casting him as Javert, the BBC is thought to be the first broadcaster to have selected a non-white actor in the joint-lead role. After the backlash Jodie Whittaker received from some quarters after becoming the first female lead in Doctor Who, does Oyelowo wonder if there will be similar grumblings from people who believe Javert should only ever be a white man?
“In my opinion, we take a far greater licence by taking French history and transposing it onto British history than we do by suggesting that people of colour were integral to European life in the 19th century,” he says. “We have transposed this onto English society in order for it to be understood by a broader audience beyond French people.
“And so if we want to make something that is relevant to the world that we actually live in, we should be reflecting that in every sense, not just the actual language we’re translating the show into but the people who get to portray the characters as well.”
And in casting the actor who has played spies, corrupt detectives and a chess coach in his career so far, director Tom Shankland believes Javert has been given new depth. Speaking to DQ earlier this year, Shankland said Oyelowo had done such an effective job of layering the character and providing a perfect foil for Dominic West’s Valjean that “by the end, I’m almost in tears for Javert.”
“David kept on looking and finding, in extraordinary ways, the humanity – however twisted and bitter – in Javert,” Shankland said. “In my wildest dreams I wasn’t sure we’d get to that place with a character like that. David dug so deep, but all the time he’s scary and driven and the person we hope will never succeed.”
Oyelowo himself says he had conversations with Shankland to discuss how best to portray Javert. While the character has previously been played by esteemed actors including Russell Crowe and Geoffrey Rush, Oyelowo says he did not draw on past interpretations because of the very fact the character has been cast as merely the villain of the piece. Moreover, Javert has often been deemed “quite posh” compared with Valjean, something Oyelowo believes is at odds with Hugo’s work.
“This book is about the underclass, and my character was born in a prison to criminal parents. The portrayals I’ve seen thus far I don’t feel suggest that. In many ways, Jean Valjean and Javert are mirror images of each other; they’re both coming from criminality as opposed to what I’ve seen in the past, which is Javert seeming to be quite posh in relation to Valjean, who’s the criminal,” he explains.
“One of the reasons Javert has this inexorable obsession with hunting down Jean Valjean is that he represents what Javert could have been, under different circumstances, and what he hates in terms of his own upbringing, what lies in his own familial past – that his own parents were in exactly the same situation that Jean Valjean finds himself in for having stolen a loaf of bread.
“His hatred of his parents and upbringing is partly why he hates Jean Valjean. I haven’t seen that before. In talking to Tom, it was very clear we were trying to do something quite different and, hopefully without sounding conceited, something far more real in terms of the novel.”
That said, Oyelowo isn’t completely averse to past interpretations of the novel, and laughs when asked if he’s pleased there will be no singing involved in Davies’ adaptation, which comes from producer Lookout Point and BBC Studios, with the later also distributing. “I like singing; I personally enjoyed the musical film,” he concludes. “But if you’re going to tell this story, you don’t want to literally be doing a version of what we’ve seen quite recently. What we’ve set out to do is something quite different, even though it does have that iconic title.”
Though they may not be accompanied by a tune, it is likely Oyelowo will make Hugo’s words sing when Javert returns to the small screen next year.
By John Elmes, December 19, 2018, Drama Quarterly (x)
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Momiplier’s Bulgogi Recipe (according to her son, Mark)
1. Dump your meat
1. Prepare your vegetables
2. Wash good
3. Wash g o o d
4. Don’t trust farmers
5. Put a little extra you-know-what in your ingredients
6. Dump the meat
7. Measure out your meat unnecessarily precisely and then slap it in the bowl
8. Korea does not have a system of measurement - they go by spoon. If you measure it will be wrong.
SIDE NOTE: If it fits in your mouth it’s a tablespoon
9. Tendenize your meat (can use either a hammer or pineapple - eyeball the pineapple)
10. Juice is the best
12. Kill the fat cells
13. Practice
13?. All of it. It’s never enough.
14. A. Only cook if you’re feeding 10 people or more
B. Korean recipes are only catered to families of 10 or more.
15. Mushroom time
16. The chunky has to go fine
16?. Make sure you get your vitamin something
17. You need mineral. You mineral or you die.
18. Pound it until hamburger
18?. You must be precise
19. I just lied
19?. Throw away your tablespoons. You won’t need them.
20. A. I lied again.
B. Check to see if it’s a tablespoon by putting it in your mouth. (1 tablespoon garlic)
21. All the other steps are not important. Every step from 21-on is important
22. It’s expected that all your ingredients should mix together at any given moment
23. Real sesame oil - 1 rounded tablespoon
24. And one more
25. A. Add MSG
B. It’s your choice
27. Everything’s a tablespoon unless it’s two tablespoons
28. Go with your gut
29. A. Onion has to have there
B. You could have put onion before all these other steps.
30. A. The more the garlic the better that it is
B. Good for you
32. Throw away half your salt
33. I don’t know
34. No time to laugh
35. Put some pepper, then throw it away
36. MOST IMPORTANT: SOY SAUCE (4 tablespoons)
37. Wash your hands
38. Mix
38. A. Massage
B. Don’t break the precious meat
39. If it turns out hamburger, that’s fine. A lot of Korean cooking is just slapping things in a bowl and seeing what happens
40. Let it marinate
41. Go wash your hands.
41. Need more prettier
43. Call Gordon Ramsay, tell him he’s wrong
SIDE NOTE: Gordon Ramsay needs to learn a thing or two from Momiplier
44. Make it 3 mm (the Bell Pepper)
45. Bitter, the better
46. No French allowed
4...7?. We’re going for color
47. Never be delicate with your vegetables
48. H I G H
SIDE NOTE: If you aren’t following along at home, what are you doing with your life?
49. Don’t believe a word I say
50. Place hand in the pan to test the temperature - exactly 5 inches-ish above pan
51. Whatever the temp was, turn it down a little
SIDE NOTE: This is a new trick no one knows. You put the carrots in the pan first because they take extra time to cook- sprinkle some salt on the top. Gordon Ramsay doesn’t know poop about this.
52. Salt brings out the sweet flavor
54. Carefully pick out the pepper in the bowl you mixed all the not peppers in
55. Cook it gently
56. You want the crunch
57. Don’t time anything, just look at it
57. High heat first
58. Check the temperature by sticking your hand, back of hand, face in there
59. You know it’s hot when your hand it brown
60 (I think). Pick a random tool out of the bucket and use it to stir the meat
60. Make sure your pan is thiccc, with three c’s
SIDE NOTE: You don’t need fancy stoves or nothing, you just need your eyeballs and your hands and your mouth to check the spoon sizes. Anything else is just French, and we’re not cooking French here.
SIDE NOTE: You want the oil in the pan, so it doesn’t stick.
61. Make sure it sizzles like a bbbppprrrrrrrrrryyyyuuuuuhhhhhhh
62. Start spooning your meat
63. You know it’s cooking when you hear the ssssssssssssssssound
64. Impatient. Dump the whole thing.
SIDE NOTE: You should be following along at home right now.
SIDE NOTE: Momiplier came into this country from Korea when she was 21 on December 10th and her life started over for the better or the worse
SIDE NOTE: Markiplier was a big baby (10 lbs. 3 oz.) and still is one to this day
65. Put a lid on it and let it do the job
SIDE NOTE: In Korea the king had a food taster whose job was to risk their life. It is now passed to the dogs.
SIDE NOTE: This has been true authentic Korean cooking with a true authentic Korean.
SIDE NOTE: You can always add more soy sauce or salt
66. THE FINAL STEP: Let’s make it a little prettier (add the vegetables)
67. “Voila” is now Korean
68. Support your local Korean restaurant. You won’t be disappointed.
69. Momiplier is never wrong
SIDE NOTE: Markiplier ruined it because he massaged it too well.
69. Deny, deny, deny
70. Maybe a little more salt or soy sauce depending on your mood
71. Check to make sure your meat is too thin before you start cooking
72. Check Step 71 before you even start cooking
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In honor of World Suicide Prevention Day, I’d like to share my story of how I’ve been delivered and rescued through my struggles with depression and suicidal thoughts. I hope someone out there benefits from this and realizes they’re not alone and hope is available to everyone.
I was born in December 1989 with Spina Bifida, a birth defect that left me unable to walk, among other things. I had to have surgery about once every year until I was fifteen years old. When I was in the sixth grade, I started experiencing incontinence—losing control of my bladder—and this condition worsened as I grew into adulthood. I learned different ways to cope with it, until my early twenties.
Somewhere along the line, I also developed anxiety and depression. In all honesty, they have been my constant companions for as long as I can remember. I have tried many different medications to treat them, but instead of helping, they only made things worse for me. Anxiety, depression, and incontinence proved to be a dangerous combination.
My breaking point came on March 16, 2014, when I leaked in my mother’s car after my sister’s birthday party. Feeling like a failure, I started to believe that everyone I loved would be better off without me. I felt like I couldn’t handle it anymore, and I didn’t plan to.
I quickly entered the house, marching into my bedroom. I was done. This was it. I didn’t tell anyone, not even my very best friend, because I didn’t want him or anyone else to try to talk me out of my escape. As I was looking around my bedroom for something that would accomplish my plan, a very distinct voice came into my head. I heard the voice say, “Go to bed—now!” It was only 6:00 p.m., but I obeyed.
The next morning, I was awakened at 6:00 a.m. to the sound of my alarm, and then it hit me. I couldn’t believe that I was capable of even trying to take my own life. I knew I had to tell someone. My best friend picked me up that evening, and I told him everything that had happened. I eventually started telling more and more people, including my family. The support I received was startling. If I had just reached out sooner, I might never have gotten to that point. I realized I was loved, not only by God, but by the people He has placed into my life. What was most startling, though, was the voice that had commanded me so clearly on that dark night. As I looked back, I knew beyond any doubt that the voice I had heard belonged to the love of my life, Jesus Christ.
Through my trials, I have come to discover that God is real, and He is good, and He is enough. He was the only One who knew what I was going through that night in my room, and He cared enough to save me. God has brought me into deeper intimacy with Him through every trial that has come since that night. I am not the person I used to be.
I came to know Jesus on May 28th, 2006, at the age of sixteen, after one day in study hall, a lifelong friend shared the Gospel with me and told me that Jesus died for my sins. I know this is going to sound crazy, but after I received Him, I started hearing Jesus in my head. I know I heard that same voice on the night I was planning to end my life.
I have since been called by the Lord to minister to others facing the same darkness. I am called to show Christ’s love and compassion to those who feel that they have no purpose in this world, and I am so excited about that calling.
I still struggle with suicidal thoughts. It’s a nagging thought in the back of my head. If something happens to me, I know where I’m going. But God’s grace has never failed to carry me. I’m stronger because of my struggle, because it drives me into the arms of the Lord. Just because I am now a child of God does not mean my struggle is over; it just means I can turn to Him for strength and comfort.
I tell my story because I want anyone who is considering suicide to know that they are not alone. I want to help them to reach out, because if they don’t, they may never realize that God put them here because the world needs them. I want them to know that God is real. He loves us all, and He shed His own blood for us. He gave His life so that we could live. Since March 16th, 2014, He has saved my life more times than I could possibly count. He is my reason for living every single day. That is why I share Him with a dying world.
Speaking of which, in the midst of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual struggles, the Lord fulfilled His call on my life for ministry in several amazing ways, both online and in my own home and community. As my ministry calling was finally becoming a reality, depression began to catch up with me. Turning to food and alcohol instead of turning to the Lord for peace, I gained a significant amount of weight. Yet this served to show me, more clearly than ever before, my desperate need of the grace and mercy that Jesus alone can offer, as in the spring of 2018, I suffered a broken knee while under the influence of alcohol that caused me to be hospitalized for 2 days and off work for 33. That summer, I received an indwelling catheter to try to help with my urinary issues, but instead it wreaked havoc on my body, which in turn wreaked havoc on my mind. That fall, I got a new wheelchair that was not the right fit for me, which presented a new set of challenges over the 8 months it took to fix it.
In the spring of 2019, I got a bone infection through a sore on my foot which led to 2 hospitalizations. That fall I was diagnosed with obstructive sleep apnea and given a CPAP to help, but the challenges of adjusting to the machine led to sleep deprivation, which deepened my depression.
My self-care continues to be an issue. I still struggle to keep my home and body clean, part of which actually led to the loss of my first job in 2016.
I’ve caught myself whispering “I wish I was dead” countless times. But now I know that’s not really true because when I was in the hospital in the spring of 2019, thinking I was dying, I realized I wasn’t really ready. And if that wasn’t enough, God showed me that many of the great men of faith in Scripture - Jeremiah, Moses, Jonah, Elijah - all struggled with the same thoughts, and that this struggle does not equal a lack of faith.
Living for Jesus has taken on a new, literal meaning for me. When I feel like I have nothing else to live for and no strength left, He continues to remind me that He gives me strength to face anything. He has shown me that nothing surprises Him. He has taught me that these trials are meant to purify my faith and to build endurance, which He promises will lead to strengthened character and hope. He said that no weapon formed against me will succeed, and that my vindication comes from Him alone, and that my hope will never be cut off. His authority brings me comfort. His victory over the world in the midst of my troubles brings me peace. He is the strength of my heart when my mind and body fail. His grace truly is enough, because His promises preserve my life, and His goodness and mercy continue to chase me down every day.
I can’t say my faith has never been shaken; that would be a lie. When I take my eyes off the Lord and His promises, I sink right back into deadly despair. The enemy has taken advantage of my struggles to whisper lies about God and His Truth, and I’ve fallen for them more times than I can count, getting in fights with God and almost reaching the point of turning my back on Him. Yet the Lord never ceases to pursue me, and He keeps me in His perfect peace as I fix my mind on Him, and He has promised that He will finish the good work He started in me.
When my feelings of despair grow too strong, I am tempted to feel worthless. A secret battle with addiction to pornography warped my sexuality and often led me to lose sight of my identity as a holy and pure child of God. The one thing that combats the lies greater than anything else is the truth of the worth that the Lord has placed on me by shedding His priceless blood on the cross for me. The blood of God in human form is the most precious substance in all creation, and that’s the price He paid for me, and for all of us, and He has promised overwhelming victory in Christ, even when I feel defeated.
When I mess up, which I do daily, I struggle to forgive myself, but God is faithful and just to forgive my sins, because of what Jesus did on the cross - therefore I must forgive myself, no matter how far I fall.
The Lord has promised to keep me strong to the end so that I will be blameless on the day that He returns. He says that His disciples are the light of the world, and that the light can never be extinguished by the darkness. Even when my body is failing, God tells me that I am wonderfully made, and that there is wonderful joy ahead.
I can’t take any credit for the strength that I’ve found through faith in Christ. I yearn for stronger faith every day. I still struggle to believe the truth of God over the lies of Satan and my own mind. I still struggle to turn to the God of all comfort instead of things that will never ultimately satisfy, even though I am now both clean and sober. I am more grateful for the grace and mercy of the Lord Jesus Christ than ever before, because He is enough. He showed me that I don’t need alcohol or porn or any created thing to deal with depression. All I need is Jesus, and He has proven through all these years that He will never leave me. He is my joy, my living hope, and the love of my life. He has filled every void in my life in an indescribably powerful way. I am also in therapy through my church to help me deal with all these challenges and more, and I thank God for that as well. My prayer is that others who are struggling find lasting hope in Jesus Christ. He is SO faithful!
I am in absolute awe of the way the Lord chose to grow my faith through trials. In May of 2020, at age 30, in the middle of the coronavirus pandemic, I underwent bladder surgery and had a stoma placed in my belly. This was the hardest decision I’d had to make so far in my life, and the timing felt awful to say the least. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t struggle, but the Lord directed my steps the whole way. I wouldn’t be allowed visitors for the majority of my initial hospital stay... so the Lord sent me a whole new support system in the hospital. Don’t ever tell me He doesn’t work through people. He does. The recovery, which was only supposed to take 6-8 weeks, went on for over four months. I not only underwent physical surgery; the Lord performed a major spiritual surgery in my heart. It was incredibly difficult. I was scared. I was broken. I felt far from God. But Jesus never failed to meet me where I was, even in my fear, and He proved Himself ever faithful over and over again. He showed me that in baptizing me with this fire, He is with me, fulfilling His promise to make me holy in every way by burning and blasting away my pride and impurities and sin, and transforming me into His image, in which I was created, and that He will only allow this fire to burn as long as necessary to accomplish His purpose. He has promised to conquer my sins! He has shown me that no matter what heartbreak I face, He is close, keeping track of each of my tears. He is pruning me to bear more fruit, with the promise that the discipline He provides will produce a harvest of righteousness for those who are trained by it. He taught me that He only does what is good, that He is for me and not against me, and that He will not allow me to be destroyed. Jesus has revealed Himself to me as the Word of God made flesh. He has shown me the deceitfulness of sin, and the war that it has been waging against my soul. He has revealed to me that sinful pleasures are temporary and can never fully satisfy me; only the pleasures that are found in Him can provide fullness of eternal joy. He’s shown me that His love is holy, pure, and without hypocrisy, and does not delight in evil, but rejoices in the truth. He has revealed Himself to me as the God of truth, who alone has the right to define that which He has designed. He’s taught me that no one who believes in Him will be put to shame, and therefore any shame I feel is false and not from Him. In this wrestling with Him for the blessings He has promised, He is wrestling with me for my repentance, drawing me into a deeper, more authentic relationship with Him than ever before.
I could never have imagined the road that God would lay out for me to experience abundant life with Him. Beyond my physical health, I am so grateful for the spiritual healing the Lord has worked in me. I am so excited to see what God has in store for me in the future.
#WorldSuicidePreventionDay #endthestigma #youarenotalone
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1 till 150 plssss
okaaay here we go
1. Who was the last person you held hands with?
my friend
2. Are you outgoing or shy?
def shy
3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?
you
4. Are you easy to get along with?
I think so
5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?
yesss
6. What kind of people are you attracted to?
sweet, confident, funny, caring, female
7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?
hopefully haha
8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?
Daniel Gillies all the time
9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?
with my mom, yes
10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?
my friendd
11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?
are you sleepy?
12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?
oooh i would say bruises by lewis capaldi, glass house by Kaleo, Crash & Burn by G-Eazy and Kehlani, sunday kind of love by Etta James, and lost without you by Freya Ridings. Follow my spotify itsmeeetori
13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?
yesss😍😍
14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?
yes
15. What good thing happened this summer?
I drove to San Francisco in August and waited almost 7 hours alone to meet Fifth Harmony
16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
No, unless my mom counts then yes.
17. Do you think there is life on other planets?
I think there is no way there isn’t life on other planets. If not in our solar system, then in others. There are billions of other planets that haven’t been discovered/explored
18. Do you still talk to your first crush?
I have no idea lmaoo
19. Do you like bubble baths?
yesss
20. Do you like your neighbors?
yeah
21. What are you bad habits?
procrastinating, cracking my knuckles, slouching
22. Where would you like to travel?
everywhere omg there are too many places to list
23. Do you have trust issues?
I don’t think so. In fact I think I trust too easily
24. Favorite part of your daily routine?
either eating or sleeping lmao
25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?
My hair (does that count?)
26. What do you do when you wake up?
go back to sleep lmaoo
27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?
neither
28. Who are you most comfortable around?
my family
29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?
yes
30. Do you ever want to get married?
yesss
31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?
yes
32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?
Lauren Jauregui and Alycia Debnam-Carey
33. Spell your name with your chin.
tklri
34. Do you play sports? What sports?
I played soccer and ran track and field, but nothing currently
35. Would you rather live without TV or music?
omg probably without TV
36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?
oh yes definitely
37. What do you say during awkward silences?
nothing, I just laugh
38. Describe your dream girl/guy?
She would have the same views as me and same taste in music. We would cook together and take walks on the beach and travel the world together
39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?
H&M, Dimples, Target
40. What do you want to do after high school?
finish my undergrad without going broke and then go to med school (also without going broke although I already am)
41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
no
42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?
I’m just being me lol
43. Do you smile at strangers?
yess
44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?
outer spaceee
45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?
I think this is a really loaded question. I’m not sure
46. What are you paranoid about?
too many things
47. Have you ever been high?
nah
48. Have you ever been drunk?
yeahh
49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?
I don’t think so
50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?
dark grey (omg i still have 100 more questions)
51. Ever wished you were someone else?
Yes
52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?
I wish I was more outgoing
53. Favourite makeup brand?
I don’t really wear makeup
54. Favourite store?
Rip n Dip
55. Favourite blog?
All of themm
56. Favourite colour?
ooh probably like all pastels
57. Favourite food?
sushi or any pasta dish really
58. Last thing you ate?
Indian food
59. First thing you ate this morning?
A poptart lol
60. Ever won a competition? For what?
I got MVP sprinter my freshman year for track and field
61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?
nope
62. Been arrested? For what?
nope
63. Ever been in love?
I dont know, I don’t think so
64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?
oh god it was in 8th grade in the cinema during the amazing spider-man 2 and my brother was sitting on the other side
65. Are you hungry right now?
noo im so full
66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?
oh yea def
67. Facebook or Twitter?
Twitter
68. Twitter or Tumblr?
Tumblr
69. Are you watching tv right now?
Nope
70. Names of your bestfriends?
Jessica, Sophie, Luca
71. Craving something? What?
im too full to think about food but probably any sweet pastry
72. What colour are your towels?
blue, white, beige
72. How many pillows do you sleep with?
two
73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
yes ahaha
74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?
on my bed, 1. In my room, like 7 lol
75. Favourite animal?
DOGS
76. What colour is your underwear?
Grey
77. Chocolate or Vanilla?
depends, usually vanilla though
78. Favourite ice cream flavour?
either mint chocolate chip or cookies and creme
79. What colour shirt are you wearing?
im only wearing a dark grey hoodie
80. What colour pants?
black and white
81. Favourite tv show?
the bold type
82. Favourite movie?
I can’t pick one but definitely Burnt, Carol, a single man, the notebook, la la land
83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?
oh god, does anyone like 2??
84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?
Mean girls
85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?
Karen
86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?
DORY
87. First person you talked to today?
Lies
88. Last person you talked to today?
Lies lol
89. Name a person you hate?
trump
90. Name a person you love?
Obama
91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?
Donald trump
92. In a fight with someone?
nope
93. How many sweatpants do you have?
4 i think
94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?
oh jeez like 10 hoodies and 5 sweaters?? probably more
95. Last movie you watched?
A single man
96. Favourite actress?
so hard omg. I would have to say Angelina Jolie
97. Favourite actor?
Daniel Gillies
98. Do you tan a lot?
Yes when I play sports haha
99. Have any pets?
two shih tzus
100. How are you feeling?
I’m okay I think, pretty good actually
101. Do you type fast?
i think so lol
102. Do you regret anything from your past?
plenty
103. Can you spell well?
yes
104. Do you miss anyone from your past?
my best friend who moved across the country
105. Ever been to a bonfire party?
no
106. Ever broken someone’s heart?
unfortunately, yes
107. Have you ever been on a horse?
yes
108. What should you be doing?
probably homework lol
109. Is something irritating you right now?
nope
110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?
yess
111. Do you have trust issues?
didn’t I already answer this?
112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?
I don’t remember, probably my brother or my mom because of a show lol
113. What was your childhood nickname?
just tori
114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?
yes barely. Hawaii and Nevada
115. Do you play the Wii?
Lego Star Warsssss
116. Are you listening to music right now?
yess
117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?
yes
118. Do you like Chinese food?
not really
119. Favourite book?
We Are Okay
120. Are you afraid of the dark?
Not really
121. Are you mean?
I can be if i’m in a bad mood but I feel really bad about it
122. Is cheating ever okay?
No.
123. Can you keep white shoes clean?
never lmao
124. Do you believe in love at first sight?
yess
125. Do you believe in true love?
yes
126. Are you currently bored?
nope
127. What makes you happy?
reading, lying in bed with my dogs, rainy days when im not at school, traveling, hiking, camping, listening to music during road trips, making someone laugh
128. Would you change your name?
if I got married yes
129. What your zodiac sign?
Aquarius
130. Do you like subway?
sometimes
131. Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
I have no idea
132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?
I think I answered this one already too lol
133. Favourite lyrics right now?
I have no idea, I love all of Sia’s lyrics though
134. Can you count to one million?
noo
135. Dumbest lie you ever told?
I’m straight
136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?
partially closed
137. How tall are you?
5′6″ (167.6cm?) idk what the measurement is in EU
138. Curly or Straight hair?
straight
139. Brunette or Blonde?
black hair
140. Summer or Winter?
winter definitely
141. Night or Day?
night
142. Favourite month?
January or December
143. Are you a vegetarian?
No, i tried but I can’tttt
144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?
probably dark, white chocolate is evil
145. Tea or Coffee?
tea
146. Was today a good day?
It was :)
147. Mars or Snickers?
Mars, im allergic to peanuts
148. What’s your favourite quote?
“You don't have to be anybody... because I would know, being somebody doesn't make you anybody anyway.”- Gia Marie Carangi
149. Do you believe in ghosts?
I really have no idea
150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?
“...san had pulled the wide elastic band all the way back” (The Kite Runner).
this took me an hour. you’re lucky I like you
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'The Predator' Francis Ngannou: UFC 249 bruiser is world’s Hardest Hitter
Francis Ngannou destroyed the remaining generation of UFC heavyweight stars in less than 300 seconds, which had outstripped their welcome in the octagon. The first to fall was former king Andrei Arlovski, who was picked off his feet in January 2017 with an unorthodox counter uppercut that laid him out cold. In December, former Strikeforce champion and perennial contender Alistair Overeem was next to fall, potentially with the most brutal knockout seen in recent years. A clubbing left jerked Overeem's head back too violently and medics rushed into the octagon at such a pace before the referee had a chance to formally end the fight. Recent champion Cain Velazquez sought a return to the division's top but his hopes were put to rest in 26 seconds when he was sent to the ground in pain in February 2019 by a short, slicing right-hand. And Junior dos Santos – another former UFC champion – predicted he could outbox the behemoth with confidence. After just 71 seconds four months later in June, the Brazilian was left cowering in foetal position on the ground. Ngannou has already realized his dreams ahead of his clash at UFC 249 on Saturday night with Jairzinho Rozenstruik – who could set up a title shot – and he still has his sights on boxing champion Tyson Fury for a possible crossover. After receiving an exclusive lesson from his hero Mike Tyson last November and sparring with British rising star Joe Joyce, he tweeted: "Talk to Mike Tyson and he agreed to train me for when I was fighting @Tyson Fury in the Ring. Do not hesitate, Fury. You called me out and you are going to have to deal with that now. # UNCROWNEDKING # WakandaForever. And not one to wilt under the challenge of a fight, Fury duly replied by stating: “I’ll deal with you and all the other MMA heavyweights when I’m done with my boxing fights, it won’t be long to wait! Then I’ll show u how we roll.” 🤼♂️ Mike Tyson giving UFC heavyweight Francis Ngannou some tips on how to face Tyson Fury, with the boxer and MMA fighter exchanging social media jibes over a potential crossover clash. pic.twitter.com/Q1wDH4Pl2J — Michael Benson (@MichaelBensonn) November 7, 2019 But a genuinely gentle giant lies underneath the hulking frame and snarling expressions; a man who left his native Cameroon with nothing but a dream and the determination to make it happen. He is not just tough-talking. Ngannou's deep voice, soft-spoken and with a French accent, is often tinged with sadness when he speaks of his past. The journey of the 33-year-old into mixed martial arts and then the UFC is hard to describe; maybe superlatives are incredible or inconceivable. Ngannou was born in the village of Baite in Cameroon when his parents had divorced. After refusing the advances of local gangs who offered him what is upport, at the age of 12, Ngannou started to work in a sand quarry to support his disjointed kin. Given his busy hours of work, the youngster dreamed of emulating Tyson's boxing success and becoming a world heavyweight champion. Incidentally, Ngannou was born just two months before Tyson captured the 1986 WBC title over Trevor Berbick. Ngannou began learning how to box at the age of 22 and it was his skills that really inspired coaches at a young age. Despite his family's reluctance, Ngannou continued to train until an illness hampered his progress had struck him down. After recovering successfully, he decided he wanted to immigrate to Paris in 2013 and fulfill his vision of becoming a world heavyweight champion. He eventually entered the French capital at the age of 26, but had struggled to survive. The Cameroonian was forced to sleep rough on the streets with no friends, no money and no job. “It’s very difficult when you arrive at a place, like Paris, and you don’t have anyone” he told Okay Africa. “But for me, it was an opportunity. “At the time I didn’t even have a place to sleep. I didn’t have anything; but I didn’t care about that because I’m happy. I was happy because I knew this was an opportunity for me to make something by myself and to progress.” His plight lasted about two months as he slept in a car park wearing only a sleeping bag for comfort – but he was still able to send some money back to his Cameroon mother. View this post on Instagram Congrats to my brother @stylebender. What a night at #ufc248. Africa stand up 🇳🇬 🇨🇲 A post shared by Francis Ngannou (@francisngannou) on Mar 8, 2020 at 12:37pm PDT Ngannou then took on a voluntary role in a homeless shelter called 'Lo Chorba' in the kitchen to chop up vegetables. The charity foundation, a non-profit organization, aimed at delivering 900 free meals a day for the Paris homeless. Khater Yenbou, foundation director of La Chorba, took a shine to the hulking specimen, who would often find ways to get busy in the kitchen. Yenbou reported to friend Didier Carmont after hearing of his ambition in life that he had a volunteer who wanted to become a boxer. When he introduced him to Fernand Lopez at the MMA Factory in Paris, Carmont, who became Ngannou's best friend, totally changed his friend's life. Ngannou saw no reason to train anything but the sweet science at the MMA Factory, given his idol Tyson had boxed for his entire career. But, speaking to MMA Fighting in 2018, in this raw athlete who was willing to do whatever it took to succeed, Lopez saw unlimited potential. "We have a lot of big names and champions in the gym and a television camera crew was filming on the first day that Francis trained properly with the team," Lopez remembers, “It’s funny because they actually have footage of me watching him training for the first time, and I was like, ‘F***!” View this post on Instagram Just following the tradition as always 🤷♀️ A post shared by Francis Ngannou (@francisngannou) on Jul 22, 2019 at 2:45am PDT Despite his steadily developing skillset, Lopez found that Ngannou would still ask that his bag and clothes be kept in the gym. It became clear to the MMA Factory guru after donating various bits of kit and apparel that his protege was still sleeping rough and he knew he had to take him under his wing. Ngannou made his debut in November 2013, only three months after beginning MMA training, and managed to secure a first round win via submission. 'The Predator' won his first heavyweight tournament by April 2014, and was on the UFC's radar well and truly. The call finally came in December 2015, having amassed a 5-1 record in the sport in such a short space of time. With complete ease, Ngannou brushed fellow debutant Luis Henrique aside and the way Arlovski and Overeem were dispatched began to enter the mainstream media. Casual fans and even those not really like MMA were alerted to this 6 ft 4ins specimen which had to cut weight to meet the UFC heavyweight mark of 265lbs. He was invited to train at the UFC Performance Institute in Las Vegas in 2017 where scientists and analysts wanted to run routine testing to determine how hard he was hitting. UFC PI vice-president Duncan French tried to record Ngannou's two most lethal punches; he was able to throw his overhand right and off-balance uppercuts which had left Arlovski and Overeem unconscious. Tyrone Spong, a former kickboxing world champion who was scheduled to face Oleksandr Usyk at his professional heavyweight debut, was the toughest punch ever recorded at the time. Spong managed to record his attempt at recording a score of 114,000 units – which stood as a world record. With such strength, Ngannou stepped up and threw his overhand right, forcing it to break the record some distance away; clocking in 129,161 units. To prove it was not a fluke, he delivered his unorthodox uppercuts with an equally spectacular score. Ngannou was able to produce about 92.84 horsepower with his shots, hitting a whopping 122,000 units, French and his team of expert analysts concluded. That is about the same as a small family car, to give some perspective. Such hype and hysteria saw Francis Ngannou launch himself at UFC 220 in January 2018 in a number one contending spot to face Stipe Miocic. While by using his experience and wearing down the bigger man, the champion kept his crown, 'The Killer' was not to be deterred. Likewise, when the TV cameras were on him at the MMA Factory all those years ago he had significantly improved between rounds, Ngannou had the resources to change and go over again. Yet now his loss has given the heavyweight challenger more insight. Ngannou founded the Francis Ngannou Foundation in May 2018-a charity that gives people in his village the ability to pursue their dreams in the same way that he has. It gives us great joy to see the smiling faces as the kids at the Francis Ngannou Foundation receive their custom Scramble gis. We are very happy to donate these gis to help with the foundation. Scrambler Sam Crook is currently in Cameroon giving his time and effort to the kids. pic.twitter.com/uRb3W2BSC9 — Scramble スクランブル (@Scramble_) November 11, 2019 In his home town of Batie he established the first official gym, with the aim of opening many more gyms across Africa. The non-profit group gives children a safe space and learning atmosphere, and teaches the fundamentals of sportsmanship. For a man who has accomplished so much in the octagon in such a short period of time, maybe even more surprising is the effect Ngannou is having outside the ring. Do not forget leaving your valuable comment on this piece of writing and sharing with your near and dear ones. To keep yourself up-to-date with Information Palace, put your email in the space given below and Subscribe. Furthermore, if you yearn to know about the Greg Hardy successful performance, view our construct, ‘Hard Luck Shamed NFL star Greg Hardy beats Yorgan De Castro’. Read the full article
#AlistairOvereem#AndreiArlovski#dosSantos#FrancisNgannou#Fury#MMAFactory#MMAheavyweights#Ngannou#ThePredator#TrevorBerbick#UFC#UFC249#UFCheavyweight#WBC#world’shardesthitter
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Text
Hourglass
I love my wife. Always will.
This is my story.
January 1, 1990
I’m born at 8:33 P.M. with a head covered in brown hair. I’m wet and gross and covered in bodily fluids. Despite that, I can hear the doctor telling my parents that they’ve got a beautiful baby boy now. He could have just said ‘baby boy’. My parents would have been just as happy.
Just like always, I don’t cry immediately. I just stare at the doctor’s stupid face. Then, when he smiles and makes his face more stupid looking, I start crying. Doesn’t matter how many times I’ve seen it. It’s scary every time. That man should not be delivering children.
The rest of that day is free of any incidents but they keep my mom in the hospital for the night since she bled quite a bit giving birth to me. She insisted that she was fine but the stupid faced doctor knew better so they listened. I don’t care. I don’t mind that I am completely unable to move on my own, that I am entirely dependent on adults to do anything besides shit myself. I just lay in my bassinet happy with the fact that my future wife would be delivered in two weeks at a hospital a hundred miles away.
Her name would be Rory.
January 16, 1990
Rory is born at 7:49 A.M. She’s born bald but she’ll be a brunette in a month or two. Her mom bleeds more than mine did and dies because of it. That’s something that Rory will talk about in therapy when she starts going at the age of 19 at my insistence. Her single father did a magnificent job raising her. Even got his sister to help for womanly matters. But it wasn’t the same as having another parent. It’s a hole Rory had for much of her life. A hole that she learned to live with but never truly went away. Not until we have our children. But that’s later.
December 15, 2007
I get accepted to Yale and I can’t contain my excitement. My grandfather had gone there, then my dad, and now me. There wasn’t any pressure on me from my dad to follow in those same footsteps but I, at a young age, decided that I would. That was a significant amount of pressure on its own. I didn’t even know I’d be meeting Rory at Yale. The knowledge that I had accomplished a life long goal filled me with energy and I run around the house. Our dog, Tito, joins me in running. He doesn’t understand why I’m so happy but he’s eager to join in on my celebrations. Just happy to be there. Relieving this moment is one of the best parts of coming back.
A few hours later that happy high is forced to come crashing down when my girlfriend, Abby, breaks up with me. She had also applied to Yale in the hopes that we’d go together but she had been rejected. After I suggested long distance, not even considering going to the local university that we had both gotten accepted to, she ended it. She wasn’t willing to try long distance and didn’t feel right asking me to stay when I so obviously wanted to go. I’m heartbroken of course. My first love. A first love that had lasted for two years. A love that I foolishly thought would last my whole life. I had dreamed Abby and I would be one of those old, old couples you’d meet and be surprised to learn they were high school sweethearts.
She’s the first of many dreams to be burned. But for the reality that is Rory Foxhorn to become a part of my life, Abby had to go. I understand that now. Still. The break up stings me to my core every time.
August 12, 2008
Number 5 in my top five favorite days. It’s move-in day at my dormitory. Nothing special save for the teary goodbye with my parents. It’s especially hard since I’m their only son. My dad jokes and says they’ll have to stay in a hotel for the night and cry the rest of their tears before actually starting the 10 hour drive home. I now know - after finding out for the first time at my college graduation - that that is exactly what they did. Not so much to cry. But to process their feelings for a little while so they wouldn’t do it on the road.
That evening a Freshman Mixer is held for all the new students to meet and potentially make new friends. That’s what makes today so special. Of the dozens I meet in my eagerness to talk to as many people as possible, four end up being important to me. Noah Terese, Tony Anders, Celeste Lopez, and Rory Foxhorn.
I meet Tony and Celeste by the pizza. Tony and I reach for a slice, the last slice of sausage and pepperoni, at the same time. I shrug and say he can take it. He shakes his head and offers it to me. Celeste laughs and steals it for herself. We start talking and I learn that the two were dating and had been doing so since sophomore year of high school. A memory of Abby stabs me but I suppress it. We talk for longer and learn we have some classes together. After exchanging numbers and promising to hang out, the two leave. I’m still not ready to head to my dorm so I wander for a little bit longer.
Noah calls out to me and challenges me to ping pong. I accept. Then lose. I challenge him. I lose again. I challenge him again and he smiles and nods, just humoring me. I win. Intrigued, he challenges me to another round. I win. We make eye contact. One more round. Winner takes all. There wasn’t a prize. But the winner takes all.
Noah wins.
We had drawn onlookers by this point and they all cheer. I smile and shake his hand, telling him I’d kick his ass next time. We also exchange numbers so that we can arrange for the next ass-kicking, and I decide to finally head to my dorm that my parents had so lovingly helped furnish. I barely get out of the bulk of the crowd when I see her. The most beautiful girl I had ever laid eyes on.
Brunette. Round face. Cute ears that noticeably, but not obnoxiously, stick out. In shape but in a normal sort of way. Not athletic looking is what I mean.
“Ah man is it over?” She says to me. “I kept seeing people leave on my way here!”
I realize she’s talking to me. “Huh? Oh no. It’s not.”
“Thank God!” She beams. “I got caught up putting my damn desk together and didn’t notice the time. I really thought I’d miss out. Didn’t even get the desk built!”
“Nah the party’s still going.” I hold my hand out. “My name’s Tommy.”
“Hi Tommy.” She shakes my hand. “Rory.”
“Nice to meet you.”
“I only came out here for a little breathing room.” I say. Her eyes are hazel. “But I haven’t eaten yet. Wanna join me?”
“Sure!”
My stomach is fit to bursting but I cram two more slices of pizza into myself along with a cup of soda. I don’t notice since my conversation with her flows so well. It just happens. In about two hours anyone looking would say we’ve been friends forever.
“Sorry to hear your girlfriend broke up with you.” She says. “Mine broke up with me too.”
My heart sinks. “Oh? Did she have the same reason as Abby?”
“Oh shit I didn’t mean my girlfriend.” Rory smacks her forehead. “I meant my boyfriend. Like. I was thinking ‘oh my relationship ended the same way’ and ended up saying ‘mine broke up with me’ instead. I don’t know why my brain did that.”
My heart rises. “Ah okay.”
She looks around. “I think it’s actually ending now.”
I notice that janitors had arrived and were beginning to clean things up. “Damn.”
“Yeah. Damn.”
I decide to take a shot. “Hey want me to help you put that desk together?”
“Would you?” She smiles and I get my reward before I even put the desk together. Lucky me. It isn’t fair for someone to be this pretty. She smirks at me.
“That’s all you’ll be doing by the way. Putting my desk together.”
She was flirting. “I don’t have any ulterior motives. If that’s what you’re implying.”
“Maybe.” She shrugs. “You seem really nice. But you can never tell with boys.” She smirks again. “Y’all can be pretty saucy.”
“So can y’all.”
“True!” She turns and begins walking. “Let’s go! I’m gonna have to sneak you in. No boys aloud in the girls dorm after 11.”
“You live on the ground floor?”
“Nope. First.” She says. “But I’ve got a tree by the balcony. Classic rom-com set up.”
“Rom-com, eh?”
“Yeah.” She playfully punches my shoulder. “The com part is you thinking there’ll be a rom section.”
“Rom can just be me putting your desk together.”
“We’d be the first g rated rom-com.”
“Fine by me.”
“Me too.” Then she winks at me. I look forward to this moment every time and it fills me with joy still. So much power in one little wink. “For now.”
August 26, 2008
It takes me two weeks to ask Rory out on a date. Despite that, our friends all assumed that we were either an item or would be an item. We apparently gave off that feeling each time we all hung out as a group. In hindsight, I now know that to be true. Not that we flirted relentlessly (though we did do that). It’s the small things. Buying snacks. Saving seats. Casual touching. Easy laughter. Even easier teasing. Knowing the limit without being told.
“Took you long enough.” She says. “I’ve been waiting!”
“You could have asked!”
“Do you really think I could manage that?”
“Nope.” I smile. “Where do you wanna go?”
“Anywhere with you.”
“Juliano’s.”
“Nah I’m not feeling Italian.”
“You said anywhere!”
“I lied.” She smirks. That damn smirk. “But really. Anywhere.”
September 20, 2008
Number four in my top five favorite days.
She’s studying and I’m with her. She enjoys having company while doing things, whether or not the company is doing the same thing. She says it’s like having a dog around. It’s not studying. But looking at it every now and then or, at the least, hearing it breathing provides comfort. I’m more than happy to be that presence for her since I get something really nice to look at.
“You can study too, you know?”
“Can’t focus with people around.”
“Then you can go.” She smiles. “You don’t have to keep me company. I’ll study with Celeste or something.”
“I’m better than Celeste.”
“Fair.” She says. “But not as good as Noah.”
“You’re just saying that because he’s gay and you want a gay best friend.”
“Yeah! And I can talk about cute boys with him. I can’t do that with you.”
“Sure you can.”
“You wouldn’t care if I talked about a cute boy I saw?”
“I mean there’s a limit.” I say. “But if you just say something like ‘Hey that barista today was really cute’ or something like that I wouldn’t mind.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. I know I’m not the only cute guy you know.” I say. “As long as you don’t sound super horny and act like you wanna fuck them.”
“That’s fair.” Rory says. She nods her head in the direction of the computers.
“What do you think of him?”
There were three guys there, only one of which I’d consider attractive. “Blondie?Yeah. I’d give him an eight.”
“Me too.” She says. “What about his buddies?”
“A five and a one.”
“A one?” She laughs. “Tommy that’s so mean!”
“He’s a one to me.” I say. “Not saying he’s a one to everyone.”
“Still. I’d say he’s a four.”
“You’re very generous.”
“I’m fair.” She says. “Okay point out a girl you think is cute.”
I point at her.
“Other than me.”
I pretend to look around. Then point at her.
“Tommy!” She laughs. “I’m serious.”
“Of all the girls that I can see right now, you are the prettiest.”
“Fine then name someone you think is pretty.”
“Celeste.”
“Tony is lucky.”
“Not as lucky as me.”
“I could never do this with my ex.”
“Same. Wanna know why?”
“Why?”
“You and I love each other.”
She blushes.
“What?”
“You just said you love me.”
“I did.”
“And that I love you.”
“Am I wrong?”
“No.”
“Knew it.” I smile and kiss her ear. My favorite thing to do. “Say it.”
“I love you, Tommy.”
“I love you, Rory.”
March 3, 2009
We have our first major fight. It resolves quickly. I still hate watching it. I hate seeing her so agitated and I hate being the cause of it.
“How hard is it for you to text me when you make it to work?!”
“I just forget sometimes!” I shout back. “I’m not purposefully stopping myself.”
“I’ve asked you a million times.” She says. “It makes me so fucking anxious just sitting there waiting.”
“Rory what are the chances of something happening to me on the way to work?”
“It’s not zero!”
“Nothing will happen.”
“You can’t say that for sure.”
“I’m a better driver than you!”
“AND OTHER PEOPLE ARE BAD AT IT!” She screams. Her ears go red when she’s angry. “That’s not what this is fucking about, okay?!”
“Then what is it?!”
“It’s about you not listening to a basic request. You do this simple thing and it’ll give me peace of mind. Can’t you give me that?!”
“I can keep trying. I swear I’m trying.” I say. “But you need to stop accusing me like this! Why would I intentionally hurt you?!”
“I know you’re not doing it on purpose. Doesn’t stop it from hurting. Doesn’t stop me from jumping to the worst possible conclusion.”
“Okay. Okay. I understand.” I say and step closer. She lets me hug her. “I’ll be better.”
“Thank you.”
“This anxiousness of yours needs to be addressed, though.”
She’s silent for a long time. “I know.”
“I get anxious too. We can both get help.”
“Anxious peas in a pod.”
“Cute imagery.”
“Yeah.” She hugs me tightly.
I counted it. After tonight, I forget to text her a total of 15 times. We were together for 65 years.
June 25, 2012
Number three in my top five favorite days.
My family, Rory’s family, and all our closest friends are standing behind me in the backyard of Rory’s childhood home. Most have their phones or cameras out, ready to take pictures. Two of the professionals I hired are to the side, away from the main group. Tony and Celeste, escorting Rory to what she thought was a normal summer barbecue, open the backdoor.
“Oh my god!” She yells when she sees all of us. Then she sees me get on one knee. “OH MY GOD!”
“Rory Foxhorn,” I say when she gets close to me. “I love you more than I ever thought possible.”
“Oh my god.”
“You are perfect for me in every way. I don’t care how cliche it sounds. You are my soul mate and I’ve known it for years now.”
“Oh my god.”
“Will you marry me?”
“Oh my god.”
“Is that yes?”
“YES!” She screams, barely holding still while I push the engagement ring onto her finger. She latches on to me when I stand up. “YES!”
June 25, 2013
Number two in my top five favorite days.
I watch as Rory’s dad walks her down the aisle towards me. Her shoulders are bare with lace sleeves stretching just past her elbow. The rest of the white dress contoured her body perfectly until her thighs, where it gracefully flared out to drape down to the floor. It left a minimal trail since she didn’t want one that dusted the church floor as she walked up the aisle. Her hair cascaded, yes cascaded, down just past her shoulders. I could see her ears and it made me happy to see that she was wearing the cheap earrings I had gotten her for our first anniversary. It had been all I could afford. She had gotten upset that I had spent even that meager amount.
“You look handsome.” She whispers when she stands in front of me.
“So do you.”
“Thanks.” She giggles and looks at Noah, who is officiating our wedding. “You can begin, Noah.”
April 5, 2015 and July 8, 2017
Number one in my top five favorite days.
They’re the birthdays of our two kids, a girl and a boy, Charlie and Juno. Of course they’re going to be equal.
If I thought Rory was beautiful before she became a mother… What she was after couldn’t compare. The gentleness she used whenever picking up our children. The strict, but affectionate, extension of her pointer finger whenever they got in trouble. The laugh she had just for them whenever they did something cute. The look she’d give me whenever Charlie did or said something that’d prove her belief that she was my clone. The separate look she’d give me whenever Juno did or said something that’d prove her belief that he was my clone as well. She could find a similarity to me in every little thing they did. She claimed it wasn’t fair. But I saw the delight in her eyes whenever her children acted like their dad. It was the very same delight in mine whenever they acted like their mom.
August 9, 2034
Move-in day for Charlie. Rory cried in front of her. I only teared up and refused to let go when Charlie pulled away from the hug goodbye.
Rory had to drive on the way home. I didn’t want to get a hotel.
August 11, 2036
Move-in day for Juno. Rory had to drive on the way home again.
I really don’t like crying in hotels.
October 3, 2072
Rory gets diagnosed with cancer. I don’t like paying attention to this day. But that’s part of the deal. I have to experience the worst parts as well.
She still smiles for me. But I know what her face looks like when I’m not looking. I’m glad I never actually see it.
November 12, 2073
My Rory is gone.
November 13, 2073
“Ah. Welcome back, Thomas.”
“I prefer Tommy.” I say.
“Did you get your fill this time?” He asks. “Are you ready to move on?”
“I’d like to go again, please.”
“It won’t be any different.”
“I don’t want it to be.”
Look me in the eye and say you’d be able to move on from a picture perfect life like mine. Tell me you’d say no to heaven.
He sighs. Then smiles at me knowingly. “Confirm with me one more time. You wish to repeat it all. Every moment from the second you are born to the second you die. It will be exactly the same. You will be an audience member of your own life, feeling every second of it as if it’s all new but unable to control your actions.”
“Yes.”
“As you wish. I will see you in 83 years.”
I love my wife. Always will.
-Saha
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