#I knew I listened to some weird stuff but.
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you ever wonder if the Glamrocks's face tracking acts up when they look at Glamrock-Freddy, like they'll look at his face, and the recognition will register as Freddy, but their systems for whatever reason or another think that there is a face overlapped on Freddy's do you think they see two small squares next to him, at his side, roughly child sized, but no one is physically there.... right...?
#fnaf#michael afton#five nights at freddy’s#glammike#crying child#elizabeth afton#i wanted to allude something to william but idk#would the glamrocks go into the sinkhole? maybe#maybe next to glamrock freddy alongside the weird overlapping face he has and the two kid height faces#there is a face tracking box next to him...standing#remember that post about the ghost hunters comin to the pizza plex? maybe the weird face tracking happens too...#im watching garret watts and Andrew's constant facial tracking anomalies inspired this post lol#anyways i really like the thought that despite being the most friendly Glamrock; Freddy has this......feeling about him#his AI was made just this year! programmed with cutting edge and top of the line technology!#then....then why does he go off script sometimes? why does he say things that wasn't programmed show dialogue?#how does he know about Mr. Afton? the killer from the 80's who committed heinous deeds?#Why does he speak as if he knew him personally? if his AI is just pulling stuff from online; Why does he speak with resentment about him?#IM SORRY I JUST LOVE THE CONCEPT!!#like just because this franchise has gotten more neon and sugery than ever; remember; lights can be blinding and sugar causes cavities#idk what that means just omg there is more horror potential than you think in the SB era of games if you look hard enough#off topic but back to freddy being a sweetie pie i think that its funny okay#freddy sasses adults okay okay but he isnt mean to kids okay maybe michael just idk; MATURED? maybe he just got some whimsy mkay?#listen if i was forced to be in a perpetual cycle of atoning for my own and my father's sins i would find any and all silver linings mkay#aw yeah this is sick i get to be a freddy mercury inspired glamrock bear WOOO#granted michael was probably tired of animatronic bands and pizza by fnaf 6 but ykkkkkkkk it.....could be worse? he could be his dad lmao#anyways headcannon michael listend to freddy mercury and this is the equivalent of cosplaying him scott told me so (trust)#tag rambles! theyre fun lol
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ggghhg i hate vehiclessssssss ghghghhghhhhh [dies dies dies forever]
#just me hi#i'm going to get right back to it but i need to complain or i'll turn into a stale loaf of Bread lmao :3👍#so here it is. why's it gotta be so hard hhghfh#okay buildings suck i hate buildings. but also they don't make me want to immediately explode at the merest hint of actually drawing them#vehicles?? Vehicles ???? i am going to just. what if i just put everyone in magical cardboard boxes and did that huh. what is the point !!#i have to draw motorcyclessss and carssssss and i'm okay with bikes to a degree actually <3 and horsessssssss and truckssssssssssss#god forbid you pick an older model with like 20 articles on it cuz most of them are going to only have a side profile and 3/4s view of that#dang thing. which yea sounds manageable 'why is this a problem keeps' i cannot properly see the FRONT#i have to guess?? i have to Guess ???? my dearest wish i think i'm just going to live in the sewers. with the sewer creatures#GGHHHHHHHHHHHH#i am going to practice drawing this stupid thing that i'm going to use for like 7 panels MAX and then i'm going to commit a FOUL crime. lik#rearranging someone's usual playlist without them knowing so they're confused every time they listen to it afterwards#//okay enough of that. we're good hbfhsfh :3#i have done other things today ! i've actually made a rough timeline for pi.e so thaaaat's cool :D#that and found a cool artist to follow on pillowfort. i. forgor their user but they have cool art .w.#/also i'm past the halfway mark on this first chapter which is !!!#i don't want to jinx myself cuz i know i'm really good at that hfhsv - but i think i'll start storyboarding the next part if i can get a#couple more pages done :D#//also the cowboy au grows stronger everyday hhhgfshvbh#i kind of knew some sort of au was inevitable but i did not think it would be an old west one loll :3#still trying to figure out the logistics#i wanna find some good historical fiction from those eras (1860s-70s) but i do not have the brain space for it rn fbhs - so this will do :>#it won't have any of the magic or gods i think bc of that but i'm having fun regardless :D#it Does have some occult though. because i was playing the story for my brother and i Do enjoy scaring him hhbvhfhsfvh#there are devils on the ranch!! or are they devils?? he hasn't gotten that far yet lol :>#//i also may have some sort of weird lean towards the spooky because Somehow each of my stories end up containing some sort of thriller#element?? lmao rip my siblings#but it never happens on purpose. again; rip my siblings hfhhvsh#//oo running out of tag space lol <//3#i shall return. probably with more wip stuff cuz i started like 4 canvases in 2 days hhghghdvs - toodles !!
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it’s crazy how people don’t think their death will affect people around them even if you aren’t close to them, or even if they were just semi passing encounters like no, others feel it. my neighbor died and as I park my car and look up at her dark little house it makes me so sad - I wanna go inside and turn on the lights she always has on. People notice and will feel it even if you don’t believe it.
#and I feel so bad because I saw her a couple of days ago and she was trying to give me flowers but I was rushing back to work#they’ve been on her porch she said take some and I haven’t and ew I feel bad#she was always trying to give me flowers and stuff because knows I like em#she was a lot but had a lot of issues going on#she use to come over crying all the time I knew so much about her life#and she genuinely cared about all of us over here#been like 16 years#I use to walk and also be chased by her dog way back in the day#stood in between her and her husband in a fighting match#one time she slid a picture of an owl under my door and we were so fucking creeped out because what#turned out it was her and she gave it to me because I love animals and photography hahah#l'd hide from her but feel bad and end up listening haha#she’d give me birthday cards because I share a birthday with one of her daughters#definitely an end to a era#I feel bad for her daughter she was sitting in her car while medical examiners were in the house#a bunch of ominious black vans outside for a bit#I should've taken the flowers 😕#I felt crazy guilty afterwards to the point I kept mentioning it and now I’m wondering if my spooky bitch body knew something#it's me and I wouldn't be that surprised I am all knowing even if I don't know you know?#seems odd#anyways I was thinking of leaving something for her daughter but I’m not sure when#she wasn’t home today#I’m not surprised by that#the flowers are still on her steps and it makes me really 😖#anyways life is short and weird and sad and ppl care
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i love using ultrafacts as an impetus to research the most random shit. the amount of info they give is hardly ever enough to sate my curiosity, let alone convince my internal legitimacy meter that they aren't spouting bs, so more often than not i end up articles deep in Random Historical Event 47181947 before i finally come back, add the post to my silly queue, and continue on my dash-y way. it's great fun.
#ultrafacts is like an annoying little brother who learns things that are sometimes exciting and fun#and other times obvious stuff i already knew#and who gets fixated on some weird item for months at a time#and i just have to listen to him go on about so that he'll still tell me a fun fact later
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Piggy backing anon. How dare you diagnose me via rotating cow lmfao
First you make me realize I'm ADHD, then that I'm autistic, the longer I follow this blog the more ND I get
Came for TOME stayed for the ongoing self awakenings ig
i am a mirror for all my followers to reflect on ✌️
#ask stuff#LISTEN if we're all being honest here#pretty much every person on tumblr is neurodivergent. i don't think that's a hot take#i have dealt with so much undiagnosed but relatively inconsequential brain shit that i didn't even consider that these things had Names#or that there were people out there who experienced similar things and Knew the names for it#i spent like 20 years of my life not knowing i was autistic bc no one told me that's what all the things i did n thought culminated into#and then i'd been seeing things about psychosis and schizophrenia and OCD lately and while i'm fairly certain i don't have the first two#i'm becoming more and more certain that some form of OCD lives in my brain and it's a comorbidity with ASD#so like. yeah#it's been a weird few weeks kjlnjlk#For The Record though i've all but confirmed i don't have adhd#i wasn't sure at first but the main points of adhd are not things that affect me#at least not to the debilitating degree of the people i know who do actually have it#but a lot of the overlapping stuff between adhd and autism were for sure things i related to and for a while tumblr posts combined the two#like almost all the time#so you're welcome for the adhd diagnosis as well hkjnj
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Thanks to autism and the infamous insular interests, all of my knowledge can somehow be traced back to
- queer representation in media, - an interest in the history of fantasy and science fiction and how these genres evolved
and that’s pretty much it. I know SO MUCH cool stuff about history, and literature, and mythology, and feminist theory, and American culture, and....
lol you're only learning japanese because you like anime, you're only interested in history because you like the anime girl king king arthur series, you're only broadening your horizons and becoming a more learned and fulfilled person because your sincere enjoyment of something not considered intellectual enough to be worthy of recognition provided you with a small window into a few of the many wonders of culture and knowledge the world has to offer and you want to obtain a deeper understanding of them
#look the first time I got really interested in the Arthurian legend was because of BBC Merlin#the BBC Merlin that is famous for having nothing to do with the Arthurian legend#and the writing going in a lot of weird directions in general#that particular period of interest didn't last very long#but made me listen to a series of lectures one of which mentioned the Roman de Silence#so when the Middle Ages was back on my radar I knew of it#so I read it#then I read an entire nonfiction book about female crossdressing in the Middle Ages to get some context#so now I know a lot of useful stuff#about medieval cross-dressing women apparently#I probably would have landed here without Merlin too#but it was a fun part of the journey#though not a very useful one to be honest#anyway autism rocks#personal#follow your interests
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thinkin about ocs (OIFIL) and ruining my own life with it u_u
#mostly thinkin about right before brent so hes super hostile and stuff but#how when he learns chris' full name and how chris doesnt like it bc of the constant HAHA THATS /FAIR/ jokes in school#and how he doesnt like his full first name christian and right is SO against his own first name and only wants to be addressed by his last#that he just decides whatever hes got enough annoyances with his name i can respect that#and thats how chris gets to just be chris - because right wants to be right#and he understands that more than anyone but then hes still an ass and still rude to people#and all he knows for a long while is chris is divorced and so when he hears about My Daughter the first time ? hes like ???#you have a baby? a new life? hey what? congrats dude! and chris is like i mean shes five but yeah#and right knows it makes sense that they arent actually friendly enough to talk about families and lives out of work#but still hes been working with chris for literal years and how much of an ass HAS he been that he never knew the man had a daughter#and chris very confused as to why right is so interested suddenly bc mr vulgar jerk of a guy is suddenly the most calm and peaceful looking#that chris has ever seen and its bc he heard about angel and when chris jokes about bringing her by to meet him if hes so curious#he doesnt expect the genuine hope when right asks him really? so oops guess he has to pray for a decent outcome#and seeing right act absolutely normal and civil to his daughter when hes so used to grouching and cussing#makes chris feel a bit warm! like hey theres hope for him!! hes not irredeemable after all maybe possibly!#and ofc thats slightly tainted when his beloved sweet angel says she wants to marry mr right because hey no actually not enough redemption#but right and chris talking about absolutely nothing and it evolves into chris prodding a bit into the whole you do well with kids thing#and right looks at him and is like kids are fucking wonderful dude its the adults that fuck em up#why would i be mean to a kid? what do they know?? they havent done anything wrong that cant be fixed#and chris just flabbergasted at the weird honesty and ok maybe hes too harsh on rights personality (hes not)#but then skip ahead to after brent shows up and you have right soften a bit and be more approachable and more willing to talk#and chris is so happy for him but also really wary of brent bc based on his years of working with right he knows the guy has had it rough#so he doesnt want right to be hurt more than he already clearly has been hurt and so hes gotta try to protect him#so he intervenes some days when one of the two are upset#and is like listen youre both adults you have to talk this out and be reasonable#and both are like wait what why me ?? i have done NOTHING wrong here#though right is more like i understand the accusation and respect it but im innocent this time i have been NICE#bc if anyone can call right out - he will allow it for chris
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not a good idea to stay up til 2 am bc the bad memories from highschool will start flooding back in
#ive mostly repressed them but man#its always been so obvious how alien and different i am from my.peers#in a bad way#i remember i was in a classroom where my classmate was telling a story to others#that they were in on. i was just kinda there#but they didnt tell me to leave#so i listened along. maybe the socially polite thing would have been to get out of there#but i didnt! bc no one told me. so i made a few comments on the story bc i was interested in it#and the guy at some point very sarcastically asked back. i forget what it exactly was#but i do remember it was mocking. and it made me feel bad. so i just stopped talking#there was also this guy who constantly picked on me for weird stuff#i fiddled w my things a lot bc i was bored#and someone asked why am i doing that. my phones right there if i dont care#and i was like Idk. its a mindless thing#and the guy said oh Some People just do that. thats how they entertain themselves. and then they laughed#and i remember i was super confused what was funny#but i do have an idea now. at least#i wasnt relentlessly bullied at any point in my life#but i was definitely othered. because i was a little weird. and a little off#even though i tried my hardest. it didnt matter because they knew#i could never ever become a part of them. no matter how much i tried
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what the fuck why on earth did i come up with that
#dunno what you call it likr a daydream#like not totally a story cause it might have sort of involved me even if it was sort of a random character#ages ago before last semester#i went into some random old building and into some old room no one had been into for ages and there was a skeleton#which is all fairly normal and generic i cant remember the details i couldnt really make up my mind#but next there was a ghost instead#but it was one of my old classmates from school i hadnt seen in over a year and hadnt been on speaking terms for a few years#and then there was no ghost and just the classmate#but i knew that was the skeleton was the near future and stuff#sounds like a generic dream but i genuinly sat there staring at the wall spending time thinking this up awake wtf#well its only really weird cause it was someone i considered a friend years ago when we actually talked not many people did talk to me#but at the same time this was clearly symbolic of all my classmates and just the idea of having peers whod talk to me#or even that i could just listen to them talk to eachothet#when i was still at school my last year though i had like two actual dreams where i was the ghost#like i was standing in the library watching them all file out after private study like would happen in real life#though for some reason i was dripping wet cause i was a ghost#and they all ignored me like they always did which was the present then#but they physically couldnt see at all even if i made eye contact#or tried to talk to them which i never did in real life#wow im such a bloody loser lol#like i was 17 for that#only reason i was still sulking about it over a year later was cause i never really met anyone in uni
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okay, so lil steroid shot seemingly hasn’t done much for my breathing, but it did give me a bit of… uh… *squints at side effects* insomnia and sore butt
#lil lil lil bit on edge#hmm hmm hmm maybe nothing is going to help this except time and work which is… laaaaaame 🙄#my butt cheek is still kinda sore#so that’s… what I got going on#doctor wanted to give me vistaril and I immediately shot that shit down#that is evil benadryl#I got some for anxiety attacks about a year ago and HATED them#makes me super sleepy but also extra anxious and helpless and nauseas#I tried one just the other night to see if maybe my body was better with it now. NOPE! that made me feel scared.#brains are weird. I’m sorry buddy. I’m trying to find you good stuff I promise. I still love you mushball#anyway. I went to after hours care. everyone was very nice.#knew they wouldn’t be able to do anything really in depth but they got me a shot and I appreciate them actually listening to me#no copay luckily so… maybe it went ok. got a shot. got to complain to someone. got to feel like I was actually doing something. kinda good.#I apologized for not shaving my butt. but he seemed like a cool dude. he was young. had a neat mustache. nice guy.#I daydream about someone pushing a tube through my nasal passages and opening everything up#that’s all I want.#and then someone going in and excising every growth and expanding all my passages so I have huge fuckin tunnels for nasal passages yeehaw#it’s take everything one hour at a time now#I was so anxious last night. still anxious and on edge today. I’m sure I’ve got some bad vibe chemicals building up in my blood#what like cortisol or something. I don’t know juices! I just know it’s not good to be on edge for a month nonstop.#I didn’t mean to put this many tags#anyway I love you. think of me as your whiny uncle. tell me about your Minecraft world. I know my eyes are closed but I swear I’m listening#you can ignore this#text
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I wanted to give you some of Pticenoga's Borderlands AU backstory, how she was raised by Shade and before starting her shenanigans with Vaughn.
Plus a bonus comic about how she decided to set up a meeting for Vaughn and Shade, but didn't tell Vaughn who is supposed to be there x) Mostly because Vaughn has met Shade before in his macabre World of Curiosities museum and thought that Shade is too weird for him. Well, that's the kind of person that would raise a feral harpy siren, gotta deal with it!
When she was very young, nothing bothered her much as she was just a wild baby exploring the world x) And Shade was a good father figure to her. However, as she grew older, she realized that she doesn't really "fit in": yeah, Pandora is a crazy planet, but not every person there is crazy. There are plenty of "regular folk" like Shade or other people from their town - and many others. And she was frequently called a monster, a mutant and many other things by the regular kids and even adults. She was wild though, could bite them or fight with them in a pretty feral manner, and, even though she protected herself, it didn't help the situation much. She wasn't crazy enough (and too small) to fit in with the psychos or bandits, was "too human" for actual monsters living on Pandora, and for a long time she had no idea she was a Siren, as even for Sirens she looked too different. Only when she hit her teens, she was able to confirm that she is one, started using her powers, and in her human form she could see the full extension of the glowing pattern she had on her skin. She still, however, didn't know why she wasn't born "normal", and there were no older Sirens around.
At some point, she decided to become independent and live on her own. Her "wild" upbringing was helping that a lot, and she felt fine being away from people. She'd still visit Shade frequently, of course, and at some point she'd even met Zer0 and could hang out with him for some time. As Zer0 is a mystery himself, they had some common ground between them (though constantly listening to his haiku were exhausting xD). Sadly, Vault Hunters attract attention, not always positive, and that was the reason why she got spotted by a big bandit gang (could be the beginning of Vallory's gang, but before she took over). And local scientists like Tannis already declared that there may be some connection between Sirens and the Vaults. And they noticed that she's a Siren, but also pretty young (and dumb). After the first Vault on Pandora was opened, there was plenty of weird and valuable stuff around, but it wasn't so easy to get it when you're just regular bandits. And when Eridians, the aliens that are guarding the Vault, are everywhere. The Sirens like Lilith were too strong for them, and hiring a Vault Hunter is expensive, so they decided to wriggle into her favor and use her to gain access to the area. She didn't know she was dealing with bandits first, she naively thought it's a rare case of nice fellows just wanting to be friends and such, plus the Vault could have answers about her origin, and the new "friends" confirmed it.
At some point, she realized she was being used, and got into a fight with the bandits - and lost, as there were too many of them, and she had too little experience, and they knew about Shade. She got kidnapped and told that she'd do everything they told her to do, or they'd kill Shade, so she had to obey. She helped them to fight the way to the Vault and get some of the riches, and during the process she felt that she really does have a connection with Eridians - they boosted her powers and helped her to get free, and kill every presenting member of the gang. She was worried about Shade though, so she left immediately to find him before the remaining members found out what happened and could harm him. But she was too late - the water source in their town of Oasis was poisoned, and every single person there died. Except Shade though - he lasted longer, but dehydration made him insane, and he turned corpses into the stuffed dummies he could talk to (though she didn't have much of a problem with this part). As she was gone for at least several months, he didn't believe she's real, and she had to adapt to the new reality.
She never got back to the Vault after that as she felt it was a source of more trouble than anything good (in her view, the price was too much for a bunch of physical stuff).
That lasted for years, and became a bit easier as her powers, enhanced by the Eridians, wasn't only serving the destruction, but could eventually "heal" some part of Shade's mind, so the moments of clarity became more frequent (she didn't know it's the reason, though). And you still need money, whether you like it or not, so, when Shade decided to use his World of Curiosities as a spot of illegal deals and smuggling, she didn't resist, but would watch over him in the shadows in case something goes wrong.
Eventually, she calmed down and just embraced herself. And, after some time, she met Vaughn, whose personal struggles she could sense right away, as she had to experience "being different" herself.
#artists on tumblr#digital art#pticenoga#vaughn#shade#art#vaughn borderlands#shade borderlands#tales from the borderlands#borderlands AU#harpy#siren#woman#monster#original character#character development#nataliedecorsair#natalie de corsair
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Fandom can do a little gatekeeping. As a treat.
So I finally decided to archive-lock my fics on AO3 last night. I’ve been considering it since the AI scrape last year, but the tipping point was this whole lore.fm debacle, coupled with some thoughts I’ve been thinking regarding Fandom These Days in general and Fandom As A Community in particular. So I wanna explain why I waited so long, why I locked my stuff up now, and why I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m a-okay with making it harder for people to see my stories.
Lurkers really are great, tho
I’m a chronic lurker, and have been since I started hanging out on the internet as a teen in the 00s. These days it’s just cuz I don’t feel a need to socialize very often, but back then it was because I was shy and knew I was socially awkward. Even if I made an account, I’d spend months lurking on message boards or forums or Livejournals, watching other people interact and getting a feel for that particular community’s culture and etiquette before I finally started interacting myself. And y’know, that approach saved me a lot of embarrassment. Over the course of my lurking on any site, there was always some other person who’d clearly joined up five minutes after learning the place existed, barged in without a care for their behavior, and committed so many social faux pas that all the other users were immediately annoyed with them at best. I learned a lot observing those incidents. Lurk More is Rule 33 of the internet for very good reason.
Lurking isn’t bad or weird or creepy. It’s perfectly normal. I love lurking. It’s hard for me to not lurk - socializing takes a lot of energy out of me, even via text. (Heck it took 12 hours for me to write this post, I wish I was kidding--) Occasionally I’ll manage longer bouts of interaction - a few weeks posting here, almost a year chatting in a discord there - but I’m always gonna end up going radio silent for months at some point. I used to feel bad about it, but I’ve long since made peace with the fact that it’s just the way my brain works. I’m a chronic lurker, and in the long term nothing is going to change that.
The thing with being a chronic lurker is that you have to accept that you are not actually seen as part of the community you are lurking in. That’s not to say that lurkers are unimportant - lurkers actually are important, and they make up a large proportion of any online community - but it’s simple cause and effect. You may think of it as “your community”, but if you’ve never said a word, how is the community supposed to know you exist? If I lurked on someone’s LJ, and then that person suddenly friendslocked their blog, I knew that I had two choices: Either accept that I would never be able to read their posts again, or reach out to them and ask if I could be added to their friends list with the full understanding that I was a rando they might not decide to trust. I usually went with the first option, because my invisibility as a lurker was more important to me than talking to strangers on the internet.
Lurking is like sitting on a park bench, quietly people-watching and eavesdropping on the conversations other people are having around you. You’re in the park, but you’re not actively participating in anything happening there. You can see and hear things that you become very interested in! But if you don’t introduce yourself and become part of the conversation, you won’t be able to keep listening to it when those people walk away. When fandom migrated away from Livejournal, people moved to new platforms alongside their friends, but lurkers were often left behind. No one knew they existed, so they weren’t told where everyone else was going. To be seen as part of a fandom community, you need to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known, etc. etc.
There’s nothing wrong with lurking. There can actually be benefits to lurking, both for the lurkers and the communities they lurk in. It’s just another way to be in a fandom. But if that is how you exist in fandom--and remember, I say this as someone who often does exist that way in fandom--you need to remember that you’re on the outside looking in, and the curtains can always close.
I’ve always been super sympathetic to lurkers, because I am one. I know there’s a lot of people like me who just don’t socialize often. I know there’s plenty of reasons why someone might not make an account on the internet - maybe they’re nervous, maybe they’re young and their parents don’t allow them to, maybe they’re in a bad situation where someone is monitoring their activity, maybe they can only access the internet from public computer terminals. Heck, I’ve never even logged into AO3 on my phone--if I’m away from my computer I just read what’s publicly available.
I know I have people lurking on my fics. I know my fics probably mean a lot to someone I don’t even know exists. I know this because there are plenty of fics I love whose writers don’t know I exist.
I love my commenters personally; I love my lurkers as an abstract concept. I know they’re there and I wish them well, and if they ever de-lurk I love them all the more.
So up until last year I never considered archive-locking my fic, because I get it. The AI scraping was upsetting, but I still hesitated because I was thinking of lurkers and guests and remembering what it felt like to be 15 and wondering if it’d be worth letting a stranger on the internet know I existed and asking to be added to their friends list just so I could reread a funny post they made once.
But the internet has changed a lot since the 00s, and fandom has changed with it. I’ve read some things and been doing some thinking about fandom-as-community over the last few years, and reading through the lore.fm drama made me decide that it’s time for me to set some boundaries.
I still love my lurkers, and I feel bad about leaving any guest commenters behind, especially if they’re in a situation where they can’t make an account for some reason. But from here on out, even my lurkers are going to have to do the bare minimum to read my fics--make an AO3 account.
Should we gatekeep fandom?
I’ve seen a few people ask this question, usually rhetorically, sometimes as a joke, always with a bit of seriousness. And I think…yeah, maybe we should. Except wait, no, not like that--
A decade ago, when people talked about fandom gatekeeping and why it was bad to do, it intersected with a lot of other things, mainly feminism and classism. The prevalent image of fandom gatekeeping was, like, a man learning that a woman likes Star Wars and haughtily demanding, “Oh, yeah? Well if you’re REALLY a fan, name ten EU novels” to belittle and dismiss her, expecting that a “real fan” would have the money and time to be familiar with the EU, and ignoring the fact that male movie-only fans were still considered fans. The thing being gatekept was the very definition of “being a fan” and people’s right to describe themselves as one.
That’s not what I mean when I say maybe fandom should gatekeep more. Anyone can call themselves a fan if they like something, that’s fine. But when it comes to the ability to enjoy the fanworks produced by the fandom community…that might be something worth gatekeeping.
See, back in the 00s, it was perfectly common for people to just…not go on the internet. Surfing the web was a thing, but it was just, like, a fun pastime. Not everyone did it. It wasn’t until the rise of social media that going online became a thing everyone and their grandmother did every day. Back then, going on the internet was just…a hobby.
So one of the first gates online fandom ever had was the simple fact that the entire world wasn’t here yet.
The entire world is here now. That gate has been demolished.
And it’s a lot easier to find us now. Even scattered across platforms, fandom is so centralized these days. It isn’t a network of dedicated webshrines and forums that you can only find via webrings anymore, it’s right there on all the big social media sites. AO3 didn’t set out to be the main fanfic website, but that’s definitely what it’s become. It’s easy for people to find us--and that includes people who don’t care about the community, and just want “content.”
Transformative fandom doesn’t like it when people see our fanworks as “content”. “Content” is a pretty broad term, but when fandom uses it we’re usually referring to creative works that are churned out by content creators to be consumed by an audience as quickly as possible as often as possible so that the content creator can generate revenue. This not-so-new normal has caused a massive shift in how people who are new to fandom view fanworks--instead of seeing fic or art as something a fellow fan made and shared with you, they see fanworks as products to be consumed.
Transformative fandom has, in general, always been a gift economy. We put time and effort into creating fanworks that we share with our fellow fans for free. We do this so we don’t get sued, but fandom as a whole actually gets a lot out of the gift economy. Offer your community a story, and in return you can get comments, build friendships, or inspire other people to write things that you might want to read. Readers are given the gift of free stories to read and enjoy, and while lurking is fine, they have the choice to engage with the writer and other readers by leaving comments or making reclists to help build the community.
And look, don’t get me wrong. People have never engaged with fanfic as much as fan writers wish they would. There has always been “no one comments anymore” wank. There have always been people who only comment to say “MORE!” or otherwise demand or guilt trip writers into posting the next chapter. But fandom has always agreed that those commenters are rude and annoying, and as those commenters navigate fandom they have the chance to learn proper community etiquette.
However, now it seems that a lot of the people who are consuming fanworks aren’t actually in the community.
I won’t say “they aren’t real fans” because that’s silly; there’s lots of ways to be a fan. But there seem to be a lot of fans now who have no interest in fandom as a community, or in adhering to community etiquette, or in respecting the gift economy. They consume our fics, but they don’t appreciate fan labor. They want our “content”, but they don’t respect our control over our creations.
And even worse--they see us as a resource. We share our work for free, as a gift, but all they see is an open-source content farm waiting to be tapped into. We shared it for free, so clearly they can do whatever they want with it. Why should we care if they feed our work into AI training datasets, or copy/paste our unfinished stories into ChatGPT to get an ending, or charge people for an unnecessary third-party AO3 app, or sell fanbindings on etsy for a profit without the author’s permission, or turn our stories into poor imitations of podfics to be posted on other platforms without giving us credit or asking our consent, while also using it to lure in people they can datascrape for their Forbes 30 Under 30 company?
And sure, people have been doing shady things with other people’s fanworks since forever. Art theft and reposting has always been a big problem. Fanfic is harder to flat-out repost, but I’ve heard of unauthorized fic translations getting posted without crediting the original author. Once in…I think the 2010s? I read a post by a woman who had gone to some sort of local bookselling event, only to find that the man selling “his” novel had actually self-published her fanfic. (Wish I could find that one again, I don’t even remember where I read it.)
But aside from that third example, the thing is…as awful as fanart/writing theft is, back in the day, the main thing a thief would gain from it was clout. Clout that should rightfully go to the creators who gifted their work in the first place, yeah, but still. Just clout. People will do a lot of hurtful things for clout, but fandom clout means nothing outside of fandom. Fandom clout is not enough to incentivize the sort of wide-scale pillaging we’re seeing from community outsiders today.
Money, on the other hand�� Well, fandom’s just a giant, untapped content farm, isn’t it? Think of how much revenue all that content could generate.
Lurkers are a normal and even beneficial part of any online community. Maybe one day they’ll de-lurk and easily slide into place beside their fellow fans because they already know the etiquette. Maybe they’re active in another community, and they can spread information from the community they lurk in to the community they’re active in. At the very least, they silently observe, and even if they’re not active community members, they understand the community.
Fans who see fanworks as “content” don’t belong in the same category as lurkers. They’re tourists.
While reading through the initial Reddit thread on the lore.fm situation, I found this comment:
[ID: Reddit User Cabbitowo says: ... So in anime fandoms we have a word called tourist and essentially it means a fan of a few anime and doesn't care about anime tropes and actively criticizes them. This is kind of how fandoms on tiktok feel. They're touring fanfics and fanart and actively criticizes tropes that have been in the fandom since the 60s. They want to be in a fandom but they don't want to engage in fandom
OP totallymandy responds: Just entered back into Reddit after a long day to see this most recent reply. And as a fellow anime fan this making me laugh so much since it’s true! But it sorta hurts too when the reality sets in. Modern fandom is so entitled and bratty and you’d think it’s the minors only but that’s not even true, my age-mates and older seem to be like that. They want to eat their cake and complain all whilst bringing nothing to the potluck… :/ END ID]
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“Tourist” is an apt name for this sort of fan. They don’t want to be part of our community, and they don’t have to be in order to come into our spaces and consume our work. Even if they don’t steal our work themselves, they feel so entitled to it that they’re fine with ignoring our wishes and letting other people take it to make AI “podfics” for them to listen to (there are a lot of comments on lore.fm’s shutdown announcement video from people telling them to just ignore the writers and do it anyway). They’ll use AI to generate an ending to an unfinished fic because they don’t care about seeing “the ending this writer would have given to the story they were telling”, they just want “an ending”. For these tourist fans, the ends justify the means, and their end goal is content for them to consume, with no care for the community that created it for them in the first place.
I don’t think this is confined to a specific age group. This isn’t “13-year-olds on Wattpad” or “Zoomers on TikTok” or whatever pointless generation war we’re in now. This is coming from people who are new to fandom, whose main experience with creative works on the internet is this new content culture and who don’t understand fandom as a community. That description can be true of someone from any age group.
It’s so easy to find fandom these days. It is, in fact, too easy. Newcomers face no hurdles or challenges that would encourage them to lurk and observe a bit before engaging, and it’s easy for people who would otherwise move on and leave us alone to start making trouble. From tourist fans to content entrepreneurs to random people who just want to gawk, it’s so easy for people who don’t care about the fandom community to reap all of its fruits.
So when I say maybe fandom should start gatekeeping a bit, I’m referring to the fact that we barely even have a gate anymore. Everyone is on the internet now; the entire world can find us, and they don’t need to bother learning community etiquette when they do. Before, we were protected by the fact that fandom was considered weird and most people didn’t look at it twice. Now, fandom is pretty mainstream. People who never would’ve bothered with it before are now comfortable strolling in like they own the place. They have no regard for the fandom community, they don’t understand it, and they don’t want to. They want to treat it just like the rest of the content they consume online.
And then they’re surprised when those of us who understand fandom culture get upset. Fanworks have existed far longer than the algorithmic internet’s content. Fanworks existed long before the internet. We’ve lived like this for ages and we like it.
So if someone can’t be bothered to respect fandom as a community, I don’t see why I should give them easy access to my fics.
Think of it like a garden gate
When I interact with commenters on my fic, I have this sense of hospitality.
The comment section is my front porch. The fic is my garden. I created my garden because I really wanted to, and I’m proud of it, and I’m happy to share it with other people.
Lots of people enjoy looking at my garden. Many walk through without saying anything. Some stop to leave kudos. Some recommend my garden to their friends. And some people take the time to stop by my front porch and let me know what a beautiful garden it is and how much they’ve enjoyed it.
Any fic writer can tell you that getting comments is an incredible feeling. I always try to answer all my comments. I don’t always manage it, but my fics’ comment sections are the one place that I manage to consistently socialize in fandom. When I respond to a comment, it feels like I’m pouring out a glass of lemonade to share with this lovely commenter on my front porch, a thank you for their thank you. We take a moment to admire my garden together, and then I see them out. The next time they drop by, I recognize them and am happy to pour another glass of lemonade.
My garden has always been open and easy to access. No fences, no walls. You just have to know where to find it. Fandom in general was once protected by its own obscurity, an out-of-the-way town that showed up on maps but was usually ignored.
But now there’s a highway that makes it easy to get to, and we have all these out-of-towner tourists coming in to gawk and steal our lawn ornaments and wonder if they can use the place to make themselves some money.
I don’t care to have those types trampling over my garden and eating all my vegetables and digging up my flowers to repot and sell, so I’ve put up a wall. It has a gate that visitors can get through if they just take the time to open it.
Admittedly, it’s a small obstacle. But when I share my fics, I share them as a gift with my fellow fans, the ones who understand that fandom is a community, even if they’re lurkers. As for tourist fans and entrepreneurs who see fic as content, who have no qualms ignoring the writer’s wishes, who refuse to respect or understand the fandom community…well, they’re not the people I mean to share my fic with, so I have no issues locking them out. If they want access to my stories, they’ll have to do the bare minimum to become a community member and join the AO3 invite queue.
And y’know, I’ve said a lot about fandom and community here, and I just want to say, I hope it’s not intimidating. When I was younger, talk about The Fandom Community made me feel insecure, and I didn’t think I’d ever manage to be active enough in fandom spaces to be counted as A Member Of The Community. But you don’t have to be a social butterfly to participate in fandom. I’ll always and forever be a chronic lurker, I reblog more than I post, I rarely manage to comment on fic, and I go radio silent for months at a time--but I write and post fanfiction. That’s my contribution.
Do you write, draw, vid, gif, or otherwise create? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you leave comments? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you curate reclists? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you maintain a fandom blog or fuckyeah blog? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you provide a space for other fans to convene in? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you regularly send asks (off anon so people know who you are)? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you have fandom friends who you interact with? Congrats, you're a community member.
There’s lots of ways to be a fan. Just make sure to respect and appreciate your fellow fans and the work they put in for you to enjoy and the gift economy fandom culture that keeps this community going.
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I’m at the point with old friends from home where old songs just make me kinda sad now this is weird
#like I haven’t talked to this guy in. 14 months now#we haven���t talked regularly in way way longer and even before that it was ending#and my last friend from home just stopped replying to messages in the middle of summer after a day out#incredibly on brand for them! just disappeared completely bc they’re upset with me for a reason they won’t tell me and I don’t understand#but this time I think it’s it and I’m okay with that#gonna let that one slip away. I think it’s time.#god our relationship was always so messed up#we met up once near the start of summer once we were both home and it was like I was 18 again#(18 was not a good time!)#they treat me kinda like a pet and they think they know me way better than they do#I tried to make things better between us but it never worked. we do something to each other that’s not great I don’t think. and that’s fine#and I knew it was done with the guy way back in April 2021#which was a whoooole different time#idk! idk. it’s so weird bc half of my music is unlistenable now bc it’s all from those two. I didn’t find my own music mostly then#they recommended stuff and it’s less that it reminds me of them moooostly it’s more that it reminds me of Then. and not a fan#but there are some songs which I listen to and are so strongly one of them that I just can’t do it#endings! and the time after them. I wonder what I’ll think abt the music I’m listening to now in a few years#luke.txt
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26. most used playlist.
a peek inside their...ㅤㅤ∘ ˚ ( accepting )
ㅤtheir most used playlist is a mishmash of all the music they like the most, which ranges from heavier, punkier vibes to higher energy pop or rock. a lot of the music they enjoy is mostly about the vibe of it and how easy it is to move to, but there are a chunk of songs in there that are more about the emotion or lyrics which strike them. not that they'll ever tell you which songs have hit close to home for them.
#gcldfanged#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ answered: ooc.#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ headcanon ⋮ danger in the fabric of this thing i made.#it's like u knew exactly which prompt i was most nervous about getting lmao#hhh i'm so BAD at music headcanons bc i'm so weird about music i only listen to a handful of artists#and i'm constantly listening to the same stuff on repeat bc i'm a hyperfixated little weirdo#buuuut fortunately byan is like the One Muse of mine who i feel has soooomewhat similar taste to my own??#so uh. here's a glimpse at SOME of the sort of stuff they'd listen to most#yes i set up a playlist of five songs just to screencap this shh#personally i've always felt like they listen to a lot of girl groups but uh. that's unfortunately outside my area of expertise atm aksjfsd
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Just A Taste.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/cb08fe6e4391bac287eccc412eb9916d/f72b4f13be9d0ce4-3b/s540x810/daed7cf1033e0574d6da76b9e235009620785acc.jpg)
Synopsis: Gojo wants to taste readers breast milk •⩊•
Pairing: Gojo xFem!Reader Content: some plot, mostly nasty stuff, no penetrative sex, nursing handjob, ADULT NURSING, he tries to convince reader to let him suck a lil sum, gojo being weird, mentions he didn't have a mom, BREASTFEEDING, mommy kink if you squint, PREGNANCY KINK, whiny satoru, overall just a lot of nipple and breast play
Dedicated to: @busyreader17 , my beloved for hyping me up to write this, ty<;33
(a.n) why do I only ever write about gojo being a pregnancy freak? has to be studied. wrote this listening to very dramatic classical music
MDNI
Gojo has always been hard headed, never thinking twice on talking back or starting an argument just to prove he was right. And that little quirk about him only enhanced when his child was born.
Even if you were the one who spent countless hours in the emergency room trying to give birth to his big headed child- Satoru insisted that he knew best for his offspring. And in extension- he knew what was best for you.
“Formula isn't good enough for my child.” he retorted when you mentioned how painful it was to breastfeed his gnawing child.
And when you'd bring up that you were ready to start working again- “You don't have to work- that's why you have me.”
Little by little Gojo started dictating most of the aspects of your life. There was little to no resistance from you though- you didn't mind his overbearing fatherly tendencies when it came to protecting his family.
But there was one thing, just one thing you'd complain about if you could.
As stubborn as Satoru was in day to day life- he was equally, if not more stubborn in bed. Especially in one specific area.
Gojo begged. Begged on his knees as he watched you pump. Sitting on the couch and bouncing your knee as his hands held onto your calf, “I just want to taste-” he pouted, eyebrows pinched upwards.
“Satoru.” you gritted through your teeth- hearing the whirr of the machine on your chest. He sighed as he placed his forehead to your knee, mumbling something about how mean you were to him.
This newfound need to taste the milk from your breasts was mildly irritating, not being able to take your shirt off without his eyes prying- parting his lips before asking again.
Satoru would be lying if he said that anytime your breasts would leak against his chest midway through fucking- it didn’t take every ounce of strength he had to not trail his lips down to your puffy nipple.
So, so, very tempting. But he'd refrain from acting on his urges, knowing you'd probably shake him off or tell him to stop completely. So instead of doing it without your permission, he settled on asking you anytime he could.
At first you thought this was just him wanting to know what it tasted like, but when you offered him a small sip from a cup he said- “If i'm gonna drink it, I want it straight from the source.” to which you said, “I guess you're never gonna taste it then.” before tossing the small sip down the sink.
He must've asked 3 times a day. Gojo needed it so bad- he would beg on his knees at your feet, looking up at you like an abused puppy that you were being far too cruel to.
And you always said no.
But, your objections sounded like ‘maybe one day’ to his ears.
So one very early morning, 4 maybe 5 am- you were standing at the kitchen counter, holding the little pumping machine to your right breast as your face churned with a grimace. Your nipples were sore, from the machine sucking harshly and from how often you had to do it.
You had just started filling one of the little bottles, and as though Gojo knew what you were doing, he walked in. Squinting at you, almost asking what you were doing at this hour- till his eyes landed on your breasts you didn't bother to cover. “Go back to sleep, I'll be done soon.” you muttered in a groggy voice as the whirring woke Satoru up from the hazy state he was in.
He took a few steps towards you- resting his elbows on the counter as he watched the machine milk you. Jealous that a stupid machine had the right to and he didn't.
The sun not even breaching the skyline made the room dim and dusky.
You didn't mind if he watched- but that's all you'd ever grant him. But directly after sex- when his chest would be drippng with the light cream colored liquid that leaked from your breasts while he fucked you- and as he looked down to his sculped body in the bathroom, the sink running on a hand towel as you waited for him to come back to help clean you up.
His fingers couldn't help but swipe at the liquid before placing it on his tongue. The whisper of your taste on his tongue made one thing clear in his mind. If he couldn’t wrap his lips around your nipple and suck till there was nothing left- if you wouldn’t grant him that one favor, the closest thing he had was to fuck you in missionary from now on. Hoping one day he would ask you mid way through- and you’d be too fucked out to say anything but yes.
True if he really wanted to taste you- he could just reach into the freezer and thaw a bag of the pumped milk to try it. But he didn't just want to taste it- he wanted to feel it fill his mouth directly from the source. How warm it would be as it slid down his throat. And god- from the small tastes he's gotten, it's so sweet. You taste so fucking sweet.
His eyes watched as the plastic bottle filled up with milk, almost hypnotized by the liquid. You winced as the machine sucked at your sore nipple, which only made the cogs in Satoru’s brain start churning with schemes.
With soft eyes he fluttered his white eyelashes up to you, “Does it hurt?” he whispered, looking at your expression that looked more irritated than pained. You nodded your head slowly, “It feels like when your foot is asleep,” you muttered, “but not the ‘numb’ kind of asleep, like the kind that hurts anytime you move it.” you continued as you closed your eyes, exhausted and very ready to go back to bed.
Satoru raised himself from the counter, taking steps over to you as you felt his presence loom next to you. “Nd you have to do it all the time too-” he scoffed, playing the sympathy card so you'd think he was on your side.
He pressed a kiss to your bare shoulder, “They always look so full,” he murmured against your skin, you hummed in response, agreeing with what he was saying as he wrapped his hand around your waist, placing his chin on your shoulder. “So painful.” he hummed as his hands dared to trace up your bare torso.
“I can help, y’know.” The tone he said those words sounded sincere- almost as though he was just trying to make this easier for you, you let out a hum in disbelief, “Unless you're a baby who refuses to latch- no you can't.” you mumbled with a groggy voice.
Your words came out as a retort- but in Gojo’s ears they sounded like a challenge.
It was true, his child had the same stubborness as Satoru, refusing to eat anything that didn’t come from a plastic bottle. Thus the pumping and the overproduction of milk that was piled high in the freezer by now. You had half the mind to sell it or empty them down the drain, I mean what child is gonna drink that much? Even if it was a Gojo heir- no child drinks that much milk.
But the thought pained Satoru, it only reminded him of the times where that frozen milk could have been in his mouth rather than in plastic bags.
Satoru kept a light touch as his hand trailed to the side of your ribs, scooping the bottom of the free breast you hadn’t pumped yet. Feeling the weight in his hand as he lifted it lightly, and you were just tired enough to let him. “They're so heavy.” he whispered in a coo as you blinked your eyes open, fully registering what he was trying to do.
You furrowed your eyebrows, “Don't be gross, ‘toru.” you spoke in a clearer voice, earning a small laugh to ring into your ear as his hand gently grasped the side of your full breast. “What's gross about wantin’ to help?” He murmured in your ear, his hand keeping a light graze as his pointer finger brushed past your tender nipple, you hissed at the feeling causing Satoru to hum an understanding ‘I know.’ into your ear.
You couldn't see his face but you were sure he was pleased with himself, “That's all I wanna do.” his words sounded wholehearted. Almost earnest as his large hand held onto your breast with a light touch, “I'll be sooo gentle, I promise.” he closed his eyes feeling your breast fill his palm with ease, “I just wanna help you,” he whispered as he pressed the off button on the little machine, guiding your hand to place it on the counter as he pressed an honest kiss to your ear.
You knew that filling those little bottles would have taken way too long, then the thought of how much faster it would be if you let him- “Let me help you.”
Satoru’s silver tongue was never your favorite part of him, you never liked how easy it was for him to hide the truth behind seemingly sincere words.
His brushing fingertips against your sore nipples didn't help either, his fingers were very, very close to squeezing the suede ring of color around the hardened peak- Satoru wanted to see if small rivulets would spurt out of your nipples if he squeezed.
You inhaled feeling the warm pads of his fingertip caress at your tender nipple. If Satoru wasn't trying to convince you of something, you'd admit it felt nice. You scoffed, “Don't make it nasty ‘toru-” you caved, sighing with an exhausted tone, feeling his warm palms lift your heavy breasts.
Gojo’s mouth had been salivating from the second he walked into the kitchen, and as you said those words he gulped hard. “Course not~” he mumbled, allowing the truth to seep out in his words.
And as he guided you to sit onto the couch as you've done plenty of times when you'd pump, he already knew how he wanted to be fed, he had thought about it over and over again. And settled on this position, his back was pressed against the tops of your thighs. His long legs extended onto the couch- unashamed of his cock rising from staring at the cream droplet that threatened to fall from your nipple.
Even if this act was obscene and borderlining on too far- you were grateful he didn't make any teasing remarks on how little it took for him to convince you this time. That and how his mouth would have been filled soon enough, so you wouldn't worry about that.
Your hand was on the back of his head, fingers filled with lily white hair as he fought back a smile. Only the gleam in his eyes showed you just how excited he was. Satoru’s lips parted as his eyes darted back and forth from your sore nipple up to your face that was warm with embarrassment. All but asking for permission as you watched his bottom lip quiver in anticipation.
With pinched eyebrows, you guided his head towards your aching breast, Gojo’s lips parted awaiting your puffy nipple. His tongue covered the bottom of his teeth- a low groan rumbled onto your skin as he lightly pressed his parted lips onto the skin around your nipple.
You watched with a grimace look on your face, not knowing why he would offer this- let alone enjoy it.
Satoru’s tongue circled at your hardening nipple, lapping softly as he tried to keep his promise of being gentle as the essence of the milk lingered on his tongue. A small huff left your lip as he rested his tongue at the bottom of your nipple, protecting it from his pearly teeth.
His hands rested atop his tummy as you caressed the back of his scalp, you nodded your head as a form of permission, giving Satoru the ‘ok’ that he could start- his lips were slow to start sucking, pulling your nipple further into his mouth with a lactogenic motion from his tongue.
Before now, Satoru wasn't fully sure how to nurse if you let him, he knew it wasn't like just sucking your nipple. But the second he felt the sore apex of your breast press against the roof of his mouth, sucking in as much of your breast as he could, his tongue massaged the bottom of your tit to coax the milk to come out.
The motion came to him as an instinct, as though nursing was engraved in his marrow from the minute he was pulled into this world.
It took very little effort to pull milk to the surface. But the moan that reverberated onto your breast from a fat droplet hitting Satoru’s tongue- it was bordering on pornographic. It was as though he saw the pearly gates of heaven when the droplet infiltrated the taste buds of his tongue.
No matter how much fantasizing he did, or any of the ghost-like tastes- nothing. Nothing, could have prepared him for how fucking heavenly you tasted.
Your milk was warm, thick enough to leave a light cast on his tongue as he tried to suckle more liquid from your nipple. Gojo’s mouth was latched onto you in a way you knew it would hurt to pull him off.
Satoru’s gaze threatened to shut as you looked down at him. His head coddled in your hand as he kept faltering eye contact with you. Only making this feel even more salacious than it should have.
No, this was only supposed to be a way for him to help- a way to remove the aching pressure from your breasts and save some time.
But that look in his eyes, the way his eyebrows were furrowed- almost as though he was sucking your tit in spite.
That was till a bigger wave of your milk rushed into his mouth, earning an almost anguished whimper to pulse against your skin.
Your eyes squinted trying to figure out if he was exaggerating- only the way his eyes struggled to stay open, the blush across his cheeks and the satisfied smile on the perked corners of his lips, convinced you he was being genuine.
With every ooze of the prized liquid he suckled from your plump breast, Satoru swallowed. Not wanting any to spill from his lips as you placed your hand on his chest that was threatening to start hyperventilating. Too focused on suckling as much milk as he could to even consider keeping a steady breathing pattern. The warmth of his mouth on your tender nipple was soothing, comforting almost.
Gojo’s eyes were half lidded and hazy- trying his very best not to let them roll to the back of his head as the dulcet milk trickled down his throat.
Unwillingly a small whimper fled his latched lips as his eyes closed, chest heaving from the taste of you coating his mouth. You huffed a small breath from his greedy tongue sucking harder on your nipple.
Rubbing your hand on his chest to soothe the little whimpers that rumbled your breast, thankful his eyes were closed when they rolled to the back of his head. His trapped cock was shouting at him for attention, be it instinct or just wanting to relieve the ache- his hand slowly trailed down his tummy, only your eyes were too focused on his seemingly intoxicated expression to notice.
Your hand holding his head up started rubbing gently at his scalp, seeing frustration form on his delicate features- unknowing why. But you were almost trying to soothe him as whimpers vibrated onto your breast. Watching his eyebrows furrow and the growing blush on his cheeks to deepen as his eyes fluttered open.
Looking up at you from the slightly obstructed view from below, your palm on his chest being able to feel how hard his heart was beating. And as your eyebrows furrowed with a breathy sigh- you watched the familiar look in Satoru’s eyes glimmer past white lashes.
You inhaled sharply, feeling his tongue trail from massaging the bottom of your nipple to the little mound that provided the milk. Tracing the tip of his tongue on your bud causing you to hiss his name in a warning.
That's all it took for him to continue suckling on your sore nipple. You were about to rest back onto the couch with a sigh, caressing the back of his head as you felt relief wash over your shoulders, allowing him to take what he needed and then some.
That was till your eye caught his bicep flexing- and you trailed your eyes down his pale arm parting your lips in shock as you watched his unashamed hand palm himself through his gray sweats.
You huffed- only it came out in a breathy sigh rather than in the reprimanding tone you meant it to. Satoru only moaned as he heard his name fall from your lips, feeling his mouth suck rougher in order to pull more milk from your heavy breast that threatened to suffocate his nose.
His hand hesitantly removed itself from the stiff bulge of his sweats, landing on your wrist that was on his chest. His hazy cerulean eyes filled with the kind of mist you only see when he's premeditated something long before you knew of it.
Satoru’s fingers wrapped around your wrist as he greedily drank from your nipple, so greedily that the corners of his mouth were threatening to leak the honeyed fluid- he was suckling so much, he couldn't swallow fast enough.
And as the little droplets stained the sides of Gojo’s jaw, trailing down his pale skin- he led your hand to extend over to his strained bulge. Knowing if you truly were uncomfortable by this, you would've pulled away the second you saw him palming himself.
You inhaled as his hand led you to his cock by your wrist, gasping softly with a tingle on your cheeks from how hard he was. Satoru placed his larger hand atop yours, pressing it onto his painful erection with a whine rippling through your skin.
You flashed your eyes from the gray fabric that trapped his neglected cock, back to his eyes. Threatening to blink shut as you kept a gentle grasp on his bulge. Even if he was the one in your lap, nursing at your breast in a way that can only be described as voracious. That look on his face was smug, almost as though he was right this entire time and you were the hard headed one.
Satoru trailed his hand onto your forearm, smiling to himself as you started softly palming his prominent bulge.
Your eyebrows were pinched upwards, trying very, very hard not to shift your thighs beneath his back to relieve the ache forming between them.
You felt bad, like the only reason he was palming himself- almost in a sad way, was because you allowed this to happen. It wasn't guilt- but you wanted to apologize in some way.
Satoru’s mouth suckled in no pattern, his only goal was to drain every single gush of milk you offered. No matter how fervent he must've looked right now, he didn’t care. As long as he could feel your warmth in his throat- your taste coating the cavern of his mouth- he didn’t care if he looked like a starved man.
You sighed almost in pity as he let out various throaty whimpers, firmening your fingers around the print in his sweats. “Oh ‘toru~” you soothed, knowing how hard he was- it had to be painful. Your cheeks tingling and warm as his hips bucked up into your hand for more friction.
And as your hand cradled onto the back of his head, you maneuvered the hand on his bulge to free it from its torment.
For the first time since he latched onto your nipple, his lips parted from your breast with a low moan. The cold morning air hitting his pinkening tip causing him to furrow his eyebrows, but all it took was for the feeling to settle before he attached onto your draining nipple once more.
You didn't hesitate to place your hand onto his base, feeling the light trails of his precum on his shaft from how worked up he was, tempting a gasp to leave his lips, you looked at him.
And as though he was made to do it- Satoru lightly ran his tongue at your budding nipple, lapping up the white sweetness that leaked from your breast.
You kept a light touch on his cock, his hand on your upper arm before gently resting it on the swell of your other breast. Thinking to himself how rude of him that he was neglecting your other equally tender nipple.
Satoru lightly thumbed your nipple, feeling light drips wet his thumb. Enticing you to slowly start stroking him, stopping your grasp right before your fingers could roll onto his flushed tip. Knowing he wouldn't last long if you worked over his cockhead.
The moans that rumbled from Gojo’s throat and onto your sensitive skin were full of desperation and bliss. You watched him in almost pity- trickles of your milk falling from the sides of his lips, making trails of white drip down his cheeks.
It didn’t take long for him to finish draining your breast, somewhere in his mind he knew there was nothing left in your left tit, but that didn't stop him from trying to slurp up any remaining droplets.
Gojo’s cheeks felt like they were boiling on his face, and with one last lap of your nipple, he unlatched from your breast. Huffing softly as his breath tickled your damp nipple, he looked up at you, an amazed and out of breath expression formed on his face as you wiggled your eyebrows.
It was embarrassing, the way your milk left trails of a light white film on his cheeks, the way he was breathing heavily with his cock in your hand. Vulnerable.
Satoru saw your flushed face- and to comfort you he raised himself from the tops of your thighs lightly, keeping a massaging hand on your unsucked breast as he pressed his plump lips to yours.
It was filthy- Mouths dancing against each other in pure delirium. Being able to taste yourself on his tongue- on his spit laced with milk. It was like Gojo did that to show you just how exquisite you tasted. Only for your hand to keep its snail pace, avoidant of his crying tip.
His lips pulled from yours, looking into your eyes and thumbing your weeping white nipple. Soft opened mouth moans coming from his lips as your hand stroked tenderly.
Rare were the times when Satoru was silent during intimacy, usually babbling teasing nonsense. But this time, the carnal look in his eye told you everything you needed to know. His senseless prattling wasn't even a thought in his mind right now, burning beneath his skin was pure and utter hunger. Hunger, to taste you- to drink from you. To nurse, over and over again.
The one thought that lingered in his mind was to make sure to keep you pregnant- keep you in a state to continue producing the warm comfort he hardly had as a child.
Gojo licked his bottom lip, mouth salivating as he felt the warm liquid trickle onto his palm. He leaned back slightly, looking down to your swollen nipple rolling between his fingers. Then trailing his gaze to your slow stroking hand, Gojo was sure he had never been so hard in his life till now.
He licked his lips before cupping the side of your heavy breast in his palm, slowly shifting himself down to align himself with your right breast. Your hand followed the back of his scap, guiding him to latch onto your dripping nipple.
Satoru opened his mouth, closing his eyes when he felt the skin of your breast fill his mouth again. Running his tongue across your neglected nipple and tasting the essence his fingers had squeezed out. A throaty whine leaving his nose as he started suckling, so enthralled by your taste and the gentle way you stroked him. Keeping his kneading hand on the side of your breast to assist in guiding more milk into his mouth.
Your cheeks were warm, tingling from how lewd he looked at that moment. The little whimpers that came from him didn't help either.
Happily, Satoru let those unfiltered whines pour from him, if it meant you'd know how much he was enjoying himself.
And as your hand slightly passed his tip on the upturn, he gasped against you. Almost as a warning, he sucked harder on your sore nipple in return. Gojo let out muffled cries from your hand stroking past his tip, even if you couldn't see it- his eyes were rolled to the back of his head as he suckled instinctively. You looked away from his face- churned with an insatiable greed.
Looking at his pinkening cock in your hand as the veins on his lower abdomen stood proud beneath his skin. His chest was heaving once more, forced to take heavy inhales through his nose as he felt the knot in his tummy tighten.
Satoru’s whines started to rumble louder against you, watching an inhale reach down his torso, his tummy caving from how hard he exhaled. He was so close. So fucking close and fighting it at this point. You could see it in his scrunched eyebrows and desperate suckles.
You lightly scratched your nails onto his scalp, “It’s okay ‘toru,” you sighed softly, gaining his cerulean eyes to open slightly and look up at you. You were flustered sure, but you wanted to assure Satoru that he could cum whenever he liked. He didn't need to hold off for your sake.
Only when he saw the soft smile on your lips- something deep within him snapped. It didn't click before, even with your hand tenderly stroking him and your tit in his mouth, even as he was nursing directly from your breast. It still didn't click.
But when you soothed his whimpers, the tender smile you had on your lips as he took and took from you. The nurturing tone you assured him with. That's when it made sense. That's when he realized why he had been longing to help you in this way.
Before he didn’t really question it- thought it was just something weird he found hot amongst all his other strange fantasies. But now. Now it made sense.
Your mind was a mess, barely able to process the words that fell from your lips naturally. Gojo’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as you polished his cockhead, his hips bucking up into it in response. You watched as he let go of that final reservation, sucking harshly causing more of your milk to spill from the corners of his lips with frustrated whines. Being able to feel his orgasm tighten in his stomach.
The hand on your breast was practically milking you, squeezing milk into his mouth rather than his tongue nursing at it, his nose was scrunched as he exhaled a ragged breath through his nose. Your nipple was starting to ache from the vibrating whimpers and moans, and instead of telling him to stop, you raked your fingers through his hair gently. “Shh, I know, I know.” you crooned, keeping a steady pace on his cock as he simmered his whimpers.
Ever since Satoru told you he had little to no memories of his mother, you knew he had mommy issues. And when he started asking to taste your milk you were hesitant, knowing once that pandora's box was opened there was no use trying to close it again.
Only as you looked down at him, how content and blissful he looked- unlike anything you've ever seen before, you didn't mind if it didn’t close again.
Satoru parted his eyes, feeling his orgasm slowly slip in his tummy, you watched as his eyes fluttered back to his head- mumbling something in the sound of ‘m’cummi-’ against your skin as you sped up your pace. His hips twitching up into your hand as you jerked him quickly, his lungs could barely handle how little air he was inhaling, his brain fuzzy as he slurped and lapped at your nipple.
Gojo saw stars as you stroked him past the pinnacle you worked him up, his eyes squinted harshly as his lips unlatched from your breast, throaty groans mixed with whines fell from his lips as his orgasm oozed over your hand. When your thumb caressed the opening on his tip, his cock spurted out another pump of his cum with a whine.
As you helped work through his orgasm, smaller pumps of his seed assisted in the wet strokes you gave him, Satoru latched back onto your breast with a content sigh, needing to drain as much as he could, his cock slowly softening in your hand.
And as he drank the rest of your milk you rested your hand on his lower belly, waiting for him to finish taking what he needed. His mouth wasn’t suckling as frantically nor hurried as before. You relished in the warmth his lips provided with a sigh, closing your eyes as the sun started rising. Being able to see the light through your closed eyes.
When Satoru couldn't taste any more milk coming from your drained breast, he hesitantly pulled away. Resting his head in your hand as he looked up to the ceiling hazily, milk drunk as your breasts obstructed his view.
He inhaled, “Throw away that stupid machine.” you sighed, knowing he’s hated the breast pump since he saw you use it for the first time.
“What am I gonna do when you're not around?” you murmured, thinking of a world where you wouldn't have access to a pump.
“Call me and I'll find you.”
You let out a small laugh. Leaning your back onto the couch as Satoru setted on your hand. “So fucking weird.” You murmured, hearing him let out a smiley breath.
Satoru sat up, turning to you with an endearing gaze, “Only cause I like you soooo much.” he claimed, pressing a kiss onto your temple before standing. Reaching out for your hand, ignoring the mess on his tummy, pulling you to stand as he led you to the master bathroom.
“What do you want for breakfast?” you muttered behind him, watching him halt his steps and looking back at you, “What?” he asked with a smug smile and creased eyebrows.
You furrowed your eyebrows, “...Breakfast?” not understanding what was confusing about the question.
Satoru scoffed, “What for? You just fed me.” he spoke sweetly, watching the grimace on your face churn with an appalled ‘ugh!’ as you snapped your hand away from his. You scoffed as he reached for your hand again, pulling you into his arms. Peppering kisses over your features as you groaned.
“You’re so nasty.” you scoffed as he stepped forward, leading you into the bathroom with various kisses on your cheeks.
You were sure this little activity Satoru found so much attraction in, would make its way into your daily routine. Only you didn't mind it as much as you thought you would.
⋆ ˚。 ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。 ⋆
writing this added 3 years to my life dead ass.
#jjk#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#gojo satoru x reader#jjk gojo#gojo x reader#jujutsu gojo#gojo smut#satoru gojo#jujustu kaisen#jjk satoru#gojou satoru x reader#satorugojo#jujutsu satoru#gojo#pregnant kink#pregnancy freak gojo#Breastfeeding#gojo x you#gojo x chubby reader
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Could you do "baby bat" where a killer tried to kill Bruce Wayne's youngest son when I saw that all the media and the family loved him but Titus was sleeping in his room and saw him and bit him to save the baby
Sure can. Oh Titus the good boy is coming to save the little baby.
Summary: Titus is a good boy who loves (Y/N). And is very protective.
Warnings: Breaking in, Titus protecting (Y/N), so there will be aggression from Titus, but in defense of (Y/N), everyone is protective
Bruce gently cradled (Y/N) in his arms, trying to soothe him so that he could go to sleep. (Y/N) was an easy baby and when fed he would be docile and just sleepy as hell. Bruce loved that about his boy. (Y/N) was the youngest one out of all the siblings and Bruce was taking care of him since his mother passed away.
Everyone stepped up to take care of (Y/N). Dick loved nothing more than to soothe (Y/N) to sleep. It was his favorite thing in the whole wide world. And feeding him was great too. Dick just loved his baby brother too much.
Jason would jump in too, he would simply talk to (Y/N) about stuff or simply played with his stuffed animals. Seeing (Y/N) giggle and move around excitedly. Jason more often than not fed him whenever necessary, since he wanted to be closer to his brother.
Tim, despite loving his brother to bits, was more often than not afraid to hold (Y/N). So, Tim showed love in another way. By buying baby things, such as toys, clothes and other necessities and making sure that the security system in place is at the top of its game.
And Damian?
He loved (Y/N) a lot, considering the fact that he was a baby and the fact that (Y/N) made Damian feel protective beyond belief, since he is the weakest one out of the family. And he also allowed Titus to spend time with the baby, under supervision of course. And Titus was a gentle giant when it came to (Y/N).
Despite his tail wagging all around whenever he was around (Y/N), he was always gentle with him, gently licking his hands and sniffing him. It must be the baby smell that everyone likes. He would often follow (Y/N) around and whoever was holding him. Whenever (Y/N) cried, Titus would drag someone by their sleeves.
And since (Y/N) came, at least one person was home and not on patrol, since someone needed to take care of (Y/N). Everyone rotated every day to make sure that (Y/N) was taken care of. It was something they all enjoyed and loved.
And the public went nuts for the youngest Wayne. Bruce made it clear that (Y/N)'s face won't be circulated over the Internet and majority of Gotham agreed. If he was approached by fans, they would ask for photos and make sure that (Y/N)'s face wasn't visible. And then Twitter, known as X, broke. The normally toxic social media app went aww over the stories of meeting Bruce and the little boy.
Of course, no one shared any photos of the boy. There have been attempts, but Bruce shut them down. Alongside his older sons of course. Bruce wasn't afraid to protect his son's privacy. You never know what type of people are lurking around, looking for photos of children. Bruce would be damned if he even gave them ammunition.
Not on his damn watch.
Of course, any enemies of his as Bruce Wayne and not Batman have found a new target within the family. And people with not so good intentions have set their sights on (Y/N). Bruce knew that very well and alongside Tim, made sure that the security system was working.
It was in the middle of the night when Titus woke up. He was sleeping in Damian's room, whoever, Damian was in the Batcave, while Bruce, Dick and Tim were patrolling the streets tonight. Damian and Jason were home to take care of (Y/N). Titus knew that, but there was a scent that he didn't recognize so he got up to investigate.
(Y/N)'s room was not far and the door was open. Titus listened carefully and he heard some noise and off he went to investigate. He knew how (Y/N) sounded, so the noise was weird. He stopped when he saw a man, dressed in all black, with a knife in his hand.
Titus wasted no time.
He ran to the man, biting into the hand that was holding the knife, with all of his might. The man yelled out from pain, waking (Y/N) up who started wailing. Titus was pulling him out of the room and Damian and Jason were running up the hall, with Jason tackling the man and Damian pulling Titus off. Titus did one hell of a job and Damian moved him to the room and took (Y/N) into his arms, trying to soothe him.
" I'm calling GCPD. " Jason punched the man out cold and took his phone out, already dialing 911. Damian gently soothed (Y/N), who after a few minutes calmed down. Damian checked on Titus, whose snout was covered with blood, but otherwise, wasn't harmed. His eyes were trained of (Y/N) and Damian was going to let Titus sniff him as soon as his snout is clean.
" The system went down. They hacked our system. "
Jason sighed at that. That was no small feat. Their house was Pentagon type of secure.
" Tim's going to blow a gasket once he hears that something happened to the system... They must have gotten in when it was rebooted... Bastards... " Jason muttered to himself, crossing his arms. " Is (Y/N) okay? Not hurt? "
" He's fine. Titus saved him... "
Jason nodded, patting Titus' head, telling him he's a good boy for doing it.
" Who's calling Bruce? " Jason asked and Damian sighed as he forgot about them all.
" You are. " Damian said and Jason scoffed as he looked for Bruce's contact in his phone. Yes, they had channels of their comms on their phones, just in case for emergencies.
Jason stepped out to talk to Bruce while Damian turned to his baby brother.
" No one will ever hurt you (Y/N). Titus and the rest of us will make sure of that. Absolutely no one will hurt you. I promise you that. "
Jason stepped back into the room. " They are all on the way, they'll beat GCPD too. So... A plan is in order. "
Once everyone came in and checked on (Y/N), they managed to agree on a story that would convince GCPD. And if Tim and Dick kicked the assassin a few times? GCPD will overlook it. Even the most corrupted police department wouldn't mind if a hitman who tried to kill a baby just died.
But Bruce wanted to know who hired this bastard to kill a literal baby. A baby who can't defend himself. Safe to say, Bruce held his son throughout the talking with the GCPD detectives. Titus was also near Bruce, not wanting to let (Y/N) out of his sights.
" If I were you mister Wayne, I would take the dog to the vet, just in case... " The detective pointed out, clearly seeing the blood on Titus.
" I don't worry about him. He isn't whining or anything and let me tell you, he is one dramatic dog. If his blanket is not the right way on the couch, he gets huffy and whines, " Bruce said and the detective chuckled.
" If you say so mister Wayne... Also, (Y/N) is adorable. Cherish these moments before they turn into toddlers. I can speak from experience. I have 2 boys myself... "
Bruce smiled politely and nodded. Bruce never had that stage with any of his kids, so he didn't know what he was in for.
" A full house? "
" You have no idea. That one will be full of energy, I can see already. And I can promise you, we'll catch the bastard who hired the scumbag. And it's not because of your status. That baby deserves to be safe and sound, " Detective said and Bruce nodded. The two were fathers and a mutual feeling of protection was brewing in both of them.
" Here's my contact info. " The detective tucked to Jason since Bruce's hands were full. " Any questions you might have, feel free to call me, " The detective finished up and Bruce nodded, thanking him.
" No problems mister Wayne. The forensics will stay around for a bit longer to collect the evidence, you know, around the window and the crib. The man is on the way to Gotham general, since the good boy over here did one hell of a job of protecting (Y/N). Once he's patched up, he's going to lock up and await trail, " The detective explained and Bruce nodded, pretending he didn't know anything about how those things went.
" Alright, I need to get going, but anything you might need to ask mister Wayne, please call. "
" Of course, thank you. "
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