#I kind of want to call this ship subconscious thought

[hootbon]

[my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction]

omg i really really love your blog<3 you are such a sweet person and so kind to all your followers and others on here and your writing is absolutely amazing!

i saw ur requests were open and i was wondering if you could write something for poe dameron? a hurt comfort because in your rules you said you wouldn't accept full angst which honestly is so real of you and i completely agree :D its just, ive read so many fics where poe's best friend or squadron member is either in love with him or fwb with him and he starts dating someone and they look rlly in love but then he leaves the person for the best friend and i cant help but always wonder how the person he left is feeling! and i was wondering if you could write something along the lines of this but he doesnt leave the reader and hes not really in love with his best friend or anything im so sorry this became really long but you can totally ignore this or say you cant do it its absolutely alright!<33

thank you sm though and i hope you have a good day!

Anon, thank you so much for such lovely and kind words! You are AMAZING! (Seriously, they have absolutely made my day/week/year!)

This ask has killed me (positive), my subconsciousness had a lot to say, it seems.

Tangerine, Tangerine

Poe Dameron x GN!Reader Rating: M Masterlist | ao3 | want to be tagged?

Warnings: angst (but with a happy ending), thoughts that a partner is cheating, blood, x-wing fight, swearing (not star wars swearing, because even though Kriff is great, I need to say fuck), Moonbeam as a nickname, typos, rail road sentences, please let me know if I’ve missed a warning!

Word Count: 4494

_______________________________________

It was just a kiss. It was just a kiss. It was just a kiss. 

You’d misunderstood, you’d read the situation wrong, you’d seen incorrectly. It was just a kiss. It was just a kiss. It was just a kiss. 

Your radio crackled, “Green Leader, checking in. We’re manoeuvring in 5. Call out.”

“Green Two check.”

“Green Three check.” 

 It was just a kiss. 

“Green Four check.” 

 It was just a-

“Green Five check.” 

Just a-

“Green Six check.” 

Just-

“Green Seven,” you swallow. “Check.” 

It wasn’t just a kiss. 

You patted your helmet twice and rolled your neck, breathing deeply as you settled in. On your left, you could see some of Blue Squadron. 

This mission was straightforward - on a holopad. 

Two teams to escort The Harbringer, the resistance supply ship. It had been damaged by a rogue blast from a tie fighter just as it jumped to hyperspace and had had to make an emergency landing on one of Tre’Ral’s desert moons. 

The crew on board had managed to fix all they could. But without proper materials, there was little chance of the ship making it out of the moon’s thick atmosphere and entering hyperspace. So Blue and Green Squadrons had been dispatched. Blue 1-4 had already made contact, jump-starting The Harbringer enough to get it airborne. 

Due to Tre’Ral’s sun and planet density, the gravity on the moons was a little stronger than most world’s atmospheric pressure. 

Green Leader, Sena, had repeated through briefing at how this would affect flying. How to be ready for it. And she hadn’t been wrong, it was different flying here. Tougher. And you loved it.

You’d grown up on Para, a planet with a high gravity density. You’d learnt to fly there well before you’d flown in space. Being here on this desolate moon almost felt like home. Your movements seemed smoother, precise. No longer needing to overcorrect for your naturally ingrained harsh movements. No longer spinning out and fighting low gravity, finally working with the tide. 

The manoeuvre would see the ships escort The Harbringer out of the moon’s atmosphere and then the rest of Blue squadron would form a sort of 3D star formation around the cargo ship. All jumping to hyperspace at the same time to carry it along with them. 

Simple. 

In theory. 

Everyone had spoken about how practically textbook it was, how easy. 

But then, of course, why was Green Squadron going? 

No one at the briefing had asked, why would they when the answer was so obvious. This part of the quadrant was teething with First Order. With a slow, busted supply ship you were all practically screaming for them to come and play target practice. 

You swallow. 

You should be focusing on that, on the mission. Instead of the utter nonsense that was ricocheting around your head and piercing your heart. 

I hadn’t just been a kiss. 

You and Poe had gotten together clumsily, three months ago, your normal awkwardness drowned out by so much Polanis Red that you almost couldn’t see straight. It had been after the battle of Hurthwen, a nasty dogfight that had everyone hyped up on adrenaline. 

He had been drunk when he kissed you, you remembered that. 

Maybe he had thought… maybe he had believed he was kissing her instead. 

It made a lot more sense. 

Sena was the Green Leader, she was a great pilot. One to be reckoned with. She was kind, she was fun, she was beautiful. She and Poe had joined the resistance together, risen the ranks together. Basically inseparable. Always laughing and joking. She had been in the same squad as Poe, under his command before she was promoted to leading one of her own. 

They had always been close. Always. Best friends. 

Sickness bubbled in your throat. 

You remembered Frizz and Hank talking offhandedly, well before you and Poe were a thing. Both of them sure that Sana and Poe were dating or ‘knocking boots’ as Frizz had so elegantly put it. 

“Two people can just be friends, you know.” You’d said, trying to hide your little crush on the commander. 

“Yeah,” Frizz laughed, “But not them. You seen them together?” 

Hank chortled. 

Nonsense. You’d brushed it off then. Allowed it to creep into your thoughts when it was dark and the base was quiet. When Poe’s breathing was soft and light behind you, his arm around your waist. 

Him and Sana just made a lot more sense than him and you. 

“Yeah, but not them. You seen them together?” 

Yeah. Now you had. 

The Harbringer came into view over the horizon. The seemingly endless stretch of desert was cut through in the distance by a fearsome outcrop of crocks, leading up into a field of formidable mountains. 

Blue 1-4 were already hooked up to the cargo ship, all five hoovering moving together as they flew towards you to meet. 

You wouldn’t have said things were difficult with you and Poe. Well, you wouldn’t have said that before. It was complicated for everyone on the base, most staff were on different call schedules, off-world or on a mission at all times. Having a relationship wasn’t straightforward. There were stretches where you wouldn’t even be on the same planet for days, but…

But you had thought it was…

It didn’t matter. 

You’d gone back to the briefing room, just before take off. You’d wanted to tap the main holoscreen twice, for luck. A little ritual you’d adopted early on. Most pilots were a superstitious bunch. 

That’s when you’d seen them. Sana and Poe. Locked in a tight embrace, their lips pressed together in a deep kiss. 

Your heartbeat had thundered so loud you’d been surprised they hadn’t heard it. But they’d been too preoccupied to notice your presence. 

It was cliche but time had almost slowed, calmed and stretched like the moment you take aim, the second before you fired your ship's canons. 

A flash of the control panel had flickered into your mind when you saw them, your fingers twitching as if you had the trigger in your hands. 

You’d turned and left without a sound. Without a word. Without letting them know you saw. Leaving them to… whatever they did next. 

Was it their first kiss? One of many? Had this been going on well before Poe had taken your hand and led you outside so he could clumsily name all the constellations, making up new ones and backstories to make you smile?

“That one here, you see it?” 

“Yeah?” 

“That one’s the best one, best in the sky. It’s orange and it’s right next to that other orange one, like they’re holding hands.”

You’d laughed. 

“That’s me and you Moonbeam.” 

Moonbeam. That stupid nickname. 

You’d gone to your room quickly, the one that you and Poe shared, and taken off the necklace he’d given you. 

“I want you to wear it for luck, Moonbeam.” 

That stupid smile he’d given you as he’d slipped it from his own neck and onto yours. That stupid kiss he’d given you after. You’d thought that expression was cute when you’d seen it, pure. Now it just seemed like he’d been laughing at you, playing some sick joke. ‘How long can I string someone along?’, ‘how far can I go before they realise it’s all pretend?’ 

You’d left the necklace with the ring slipped through on the small set of shelves in the corner, the one Poe normally kept his holopad on. 

It was idiotic, but your neck felt… empty without it. Cold. Every now and then you touched at where the chain normally lay.A subconscious action only brought to the forefront of your mind by the sensation of your own skin instead of metal. 

Something caught your eye in the distance, a flash of sunlight glinting off the horizon. Dread twisted in your stomach as realisation dawned a second earlier than your scanners. The extra gravitational pressure and high quantity of magnetic metals in the sand affected everyone’s ship computers, causing a brief information delay. 

Your alarm sounded out inside your ship, the radar blinking into life as tie fighters approached from the rock outcrop. They’d used the high mineral concentration to hide their energy signatures. 

“Fuck.” 

The radio screamed into life, orders out pouring over orders. Blue squadron rushed into position while Green scrambled. 

“Blue in place now!”

“It’s gonna be rushed, but we haven’t got a choice!”

“No time!” “Incoming!” “Green half split! Evens left, odds right, let’s keep those fighter’s off The Harbringer and Blue squadron! Gamma pattern!” 

“How far away is the Delta?” 

“Calling in attack pattern!” 

You swing to the right, falling in with Hank and Petal and bank hard, it takes less than a second for you to notice that your squad's movements aren’t as precise and well-timed as usual. The stronger gravity throwing everyone, except you, off their game. 

That didn’t bode well. 

You climb for a second, punching hard on the acceleration to get some height and a clear view of the oncoming and flick on your targeting system. The image glitches, doesn’t hold steady even as you focus. Off by half a fraction. 

Shots fire out from both sides, most missing.

“Targeting not working!”

“It’s out!”

“I can’t get a clear shot!” “The read is malfunctioning!”

“Half a click 4/8!” You shout, as you take your shot, hitting two tie fighters head-on. 

“Good shot Green 7!” You can hear the joy and relief in Sana’s voice. “Half a click 4/8, you’ll all have to manually adjust!” 

You dive, swirling around two fighters before skimming close to the ground, trying to draw their attention away from the cargo ship. You spin, slamming your control harder than you would need to in any other situation as you turn and spike past another fighter, taking out one in the process. 

“Wooooo!” Hank yells over the intercom.

You laugh. “Bet you never thought you wished you grew up on Para right?” 

“Every day new things surprise me.” He banks left, you right, Petal dives down. 

It’s too much of a rush, everything all at once, patterns and shots flying, your ship’s systems screaming as you push the engines a little too hard. 

The tie fighters aren’t moving as fast as they normally do, bogged down even more than the x wings by the gravity. They can’t make their normal quick turns and it’s affecting their strike patterns. 

Good. 

But there’s so, so many of them. 

Explosions fly debris out, and you climb higher. Needing a clear view and unable to rely on your targeting systems. 

More shots fly out, The Harbringer is taking a battering but so far its shielding is holding the hull together. 

The radio keeps screaming, overlapping voices that blur into background noise. You’re trained to only hear your call signal, direct messages. You vear off, narrowingly missing a blast to your wing. 

“-On my tail.” Frizz’s voice cuts through the noise, a sharp stab of dread slicing you open as you turn, automatically looking to the reader, it’s still not clear. 

You climb, twist, fall, see a Green ship, followed tightly by two fighters. Accelsorate, bank. You fire. You’re aiming in a panic now, not adjusting right, not breathing through. 

The shot hits one, before you have to swerve to avoid being struck head-on. 

“Thanks 7!” Cril yells over the speaker, managing to shake the other fighter. 

There’s a scream, a crackle of sound over the system. A sound you know too well. You see the ship crash into the desert, exploding before it even hits the ground as the a tie fighter’s shots hit home. 

Frizz.

“No…” 

“Check!” Sana yells, unable to tell who went down with the system glitching. “Green Leader!”

You swerve around another fighter, everything moving so fast, too fast.

“Green Two check!” Cril.

“Green Three check!” Petal. 

Nothing. 

“Green Four!” Sana yells. No call replies. Balna. Not Frizz. 

The momentary rush of relief at Frizz being alive is cut horribly short by the image of Balna’s kind face that bursts behind your eyes. 

You bank left, right, swerve, take aim, twist. 

There’s a chance, a good chance that you’ll win. All of Blue is in place, The Harbringer is moving up with them. The tie fighters are taking more hits than the resistance, their less aerodynamic design hampering them more than usual with this gravity. 

All you need is…

Another alarm. 

“Oh… fuck.” You slam on your intercom. “Z-Fighter!” 

A chorus of yells answer you. 

A Z-fighter, a quick moving ship a fraction bigger than The Harbringer, with two powerful front guns. A few shots would take the cargo ship out completely. 

And with how slow the supply ship was moving, that wouldn’t be hard. 

The Z-fighter storms in, moving fast but not firing, they were obviously having problems with their targeting too, needing a close clear shot. 

“Take out the main cannons!” Sana yells, the panic in her voice cutting through the chaos. You turn, aim, take out a tie fighter but have to veer up at the last second. Twist. 

Someone comes in after you, aiming for the cannons, a fighter clips their side and they can’t correct quick enough. They spiral off, their ship crashing into the Z-fighter. Obliterated on impact. The Z-fighter seemingly unaffected. 

You loop back, adrenaline blinding you to everything, anything that’s not the goal. Take out the canons. Take out the canons. People are counting on you. Take out the canons. 

You fire, a clear shot before you bank to the side to avoid a direct hit to your hull. 

It’s not enough.

You need to pass again, and again. Other x wings flying in, taking shots, the gravity making them slow, imprecise. Only one blast hits and it’s not full on.You’re the only one hitting directly and it’s not enough. 

It’s not enough. It’s not enough. It’s not enough.

There’s shouting and screaming, the zipping of the fighters as they cut through the sky. Someone yells your name and you don’t hear it. 

Another hit lands. One canon out. Only one left. You can do this. The Harbringer is nearly in the upper atmosphere, they can jump from there. Just a few more seconds. You can do this.

“Black Leader!” Poe’s call sign cuts over the dim, followed by the call signs of half of the Red Squadron.

They must have scrambled after first contact. 

The canon’s powering up, a quick glance to your panel tells you that The Harbringer’s shield is barely functioning. They won’t survive a direct hit. With how close they are and the Blue Squadron ships that are attached there’s no way they wouldn’t be pulled down too if The Harbringer fell. 

The canon needs more than one hit to take it down, more than five. No way you can shoot five times before they fire. 

You twist, full force. Pumping the acceleration. Fire. Fire. Fire. Three hit. You don’t slow down. Fire. Fire. Fire. They hit. The canon is still operational. 

Sana is screaming orders, so many shots fire at the canon, none of them hit right, hit full on. 

Two chances left. 

One to fire. If it takes out the canon you just have enough time to serve up, to avoid getting smashed to bits. 

Poe shouts for you over the intercom. 

You don’t answer.

One to fire. If it doesn’t take out the canon then… then you crashing into it head on will. 

Poe yells again, this time cutting over everyone else, sending you a direct call. 

You don’t answer.

You fire. Hit. 

Poe screams for you, his voice painful and panicked. He’s already worked out your plan before you had even thought of it. 

The canon doesn’t go down. 

You cut the call to him. Blocking out his signal. You don’t want Poe to think you did this for him. 

You don’t want him to think you did this because of him.

“Green Seven!” Sana yells, seemingly knowing what you’re going to do. 

Hank screams your name over the radio. It hurts. You think it’s the worst sound you’ve ever heard. 

“Moonbeam!” Poe’s voice is ripped raw from yells, Sana has patched him through over her signal. You were wrong. That was the worst sound you’ve ever heard. 

You dip at the last second, not hitting the canon straight on but smashing your right wing into it. The force surprises you, even though you braced for it. The impact sending you spiralling. You try to regain control, try to turn into the spin. Training taking over even though you're a wing and half a ship down. 

Shouts over the radio, you barely make out- 

“-cannon’s down-”

“-Jump!-”

A spark hits, your console explodes into flame, shards hit your side and you yell. Sky and sand tumbling over each other over and over, and you manage to hit the eject button.

The force rips you upwards, free briefly from your burning ship. But you’re too close to the floor, not enough time to slow down your velocity. There’s-

.

The impact of the ground hurts. Pain explodes along every nerve despite the ejection seat dampening. You scream. 

Agony is everywhere, everything. You can’t feel anything else, can’t comprehend anything except floods of pain. 

You hit your belt, falling out and to the desert floor. Looking up just enough to gauge where you are, where your ship fell. It’s an exploded, fireball mess far off. At least it’s not an immediate threat. You crawl to the side and sob. 

There’s blood falling into the sand from your head, the right side of your face. You can’t see properly out of your eye and your left leg is definitely broken. Shattered. Still, you drag yourself forward, digging your hands in and pulling as something ribs and tears in your side, warm liquid soaking into your fight suit. 

The resistance will jump to hyperspace, they’ll get out. They’ll make it. 

You just needed to get away from your ejection seat, when the First Order doubles back they’ll see it, they’ll see you. You just needed to get to an outcrop. Hide. 

Make it look like you had a weapon. 

Make them shoot you first instead of taking you for questioning. 

Can’t let them take you alive. 

There's the faint sound of a ship somewhere above, landing gear coming down. 

For a second you freeze, panic gripping your heart, you dig into the sand hard, pull, pull, pull  yourself closer towards the outcrop of rocks. The air seems to be leaving your lungs, your breathing ragged and hot. 

You cough, red hitting the dirt, iron hitting your tongue. 

You crawl, pull. The pain is making you light-headed. You gasp, trying to get in a full lung full of air. It's not enough. It's not enough. It's not enou…

.

When you open your eyes your first thoughts are simple. Clear. 

I'm dead.

You were either shot in the head in the sand or simply succumbed to your wounds. 

But then things begin to feel… fuzzy. Not painful, but not right either.

And that's when you smell the Bacta. And then the light starts to change to distorted shapes, and finally, you recognise Hank sitting next to you.

“You better not be dead too,” you whisper your voice dry from lack of use. 

Hank jumps up, goes to grab your hand and then stops himself. There are tears in his eyes. He softly places his fingers on yours and you squeeze back. 

“You're a fucking idiot you know that?” He grins and you laugh. Which hurts a little, but feels good. 

“One sec,” he moves away just to speak to someone outside before he comes back. “I'm the one that picked you up, you know?” 

“Now who's the fucking idiot?” You smile but your chest aches, heavy with the weight of his words. “You shouldn't have done that.” You whisper. 

“What?”

“You were under fire, you should have just jumped-” 

“I saw you eject. Saw you moving. You think I was just gonna leave you there?” He sits. “Besides, I was closest. The commander would have blown up the whole planet to get to you.” 

You swallow, turning away slightly. Going cold at the mention of Poe. 

Hank mistakes the look for guilt, and squeezes your hand again. “Hey, look,” he smiles, “you took out the canons, you're a fucking idiot but you know how to fly in heavy gravity.” 

You snort. 

He smiles. 

“Who did we lose?” 

Hank sighs, “three…”

You nod, closing your eyes for a moment. 

“There-”

There was shouting from outside, a crash and then Poe stormed into the room, med staff close behind him.

You swallow, sickness building in your throat.

He looked awful, drawn out and worn thin like he hadn't slept or eaten in days. His eyes red. 

He rushes forward, Hank moves out of the way, so Poe can take your hand in his. He leans forward and kisses you softly, carefully stroking your cheek, being gentle with your bandages. 

“Moonbeam…” he mutters and you flinch back from him. He looks at you with sad, confused eyes. 

“Look, I can only allow one visitor in here.” The med staff member says.

Hank stands, and speaks when you frown. “I'll see you later, Poe’s the one that hasn't left your side. The only reason he wasn't here when you woke was because I made him go take a shower.” Hank smiled, “you can thank me for that later.” 

Both you and Poe are quiet as the others leave. Poe searching your face for something, while you look away. 

“Moonbeam,” he says again softly, but there's an edge to his words that you're not used to. “What the fuck happened on that mission? What the fuck is this?” He holds up his hand, his necklace and ring wrapped around his palm. His eyes are shiny as he speaks. “Were you trying to kill yourself? What the fu-”

“Poe,” you breathe. Best to get it over quickly. “I saw.”

He frowns. “Saw? Saw what?” 

“You and Sana, in the briefing room… before take off.” 

The small frown on his forehead relaxes slightly for a moment as his eyebrows raise. “You… saw?” 

You nod. 

“You, but, I didn’t see you when I pushed her away?” His voice cracks at the end, a splinter running into the muscle of your heart. 

“You pushed her away?” 

“You didn’t see that?” He frowns again, blinking hard, “you just, just saw and walked away and what? Took this off?” He holds up the necklace again. A tear falls from his eye and he rubs it away furiously as if it had scorched his skin. “Just, just left it and… and…” 

“I didn’t know you didn’t want it…” You say quietly, emotion is making your chest tight and constricted. “I didn’t know you didn’t want her…”

“What?” He breathes, moving closer and squeezing your hand. There’s disbelief in his voice, confusion. Anger, it’s deep down and controlled but it’s there. “No, look, she kissed me. I pushed her away, I, I even logged a report, I’ll pull up the god damned camera feed to show you.” 

He’s not lying. His gaze is unwavering and he’s got that painfully earnest look in his eyes. 

“You thought…” he shakes his head slightly, his voice pained, “you thought I’d-”

“You both make sense together.” You blurt out. “She’s… and you’re…” you shrug and sigh, on the verge of tears yourself. “You’re both the best of us.”

“No,” he shakes his head fiercely, “Moonbeam, no.” He wipes roughly at his eyes again, glancing down for a moment and you lightly touch his head. 

He looks up instantly as you stroke his curls, still lightly damp. 

“I’m sorry.” You whisper.

Poe shakes his head again, grabbing your hand and kissing your wrist. “I’m sorry.” He kicks off his shoes and clambers into bed next to you a little awkwardly. He’s trying to be careful, trying not to hurt you but needing closeness so badly it’s suffocating. 

You scooch to the side as quickly as you can in your current state and lean into him as he wraps his body around you softly and kisses you sweetly. 

“Love you, love you, love you,” he repeats after every kiss, pressing his lips to every part of your skin that he can reach.

“Why are you sorry?” You mutter as he holds you, “I’m the one that messed up.”

He shakes his head, “I’m sorry that I don’t make you realise how special you are, how perfect.” He kisses your cheek, “you’re the best of us Moonbeam.” 

You tut but his grip tightens and he holds you tight. 

“And one hell of a pilot.” He grins. 

You scoff. 

“You are.” He kisses you again. 

You nuzzle against him, settling into his touch. Knots have formed in your chest, pain that’s loosening. His warmth is comforting. Home. 

“Sana said she didn’t know I was in a relationship,” he says softly, resting his chin on the top of your head. “I don’t know if that’s true, but… I do believe her.” 

You nod. “She’s a good person.”

He moves so he can look you in the eyes. “Please, Moonbeam, I… don’t,” he bites his tongue, closing his eyes for a long second. “I want to tell you, I want to say, don’t ever do something like that again… don’t… don’t put yourself at risk.” 

You touch his cheek lightly. 

“But it’s not fair is it?” He smiles sadly. “We both do that every day… You know you were gonna be in my squadron at first?” 

You shake your head in surprise and he nods.

“You were, but… well,” he blushes ever so slightly. “I was so embarrassingly head over heels in love with you,” he laughs lightly. “For months I could hardly talk to you, you know I had to down five Polanis Red’s in a row after Hurthwen just so I could ask you out? I knew I wouldn’t be able to function right if you were in my squad. I knew that I’d put everyone else at risk because if it came down to it… if there was a choice between everyone in the squad dying, everyone on the base, or you… I’d let the resistance burn instead of lose you. Every single time.” 

You close your eyes, fighting the emotion that needs to break through and squeeze his hand like a lifeline. “I love you.” You whisper. 

Your fingertips brush against the necklace, the ring hooking around the first knuckle of your index finger by chance. 

Poe slowly moves his hand from yours and unwinds the necklace from his palm before carefully placing it over your head, giving you plenty of time to move away if you wanted. 

“I love you Moonbeam,” he mutters, his voice low, reverent. Then leans in to kiss you. You kiss him back with all your heart. 

____________________________________

Thank you for reading!

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[midgardian-witch]

can i request moon boys walking into the room to see reader just zoned out and like. slapping/tapping something repeatedly😭😭i know this sounds really weird but i do it all the time and i wonder how theyd react. i feel like theyd really understand zoning out often while doing some random task

It's not that weird, anon, no worries! I do hope I managed to fit what you imagined and that you like what I came up with 💙

Tapped Out

tags: fluff | domestic situations | established relationship | gn!reader

ships: Moon Knight System/Reader

AO3

Marc

The suit unravels around him as he crawls through the open window into your shared flat. Marc takes a cursory look around until he sees light coming from the bathroom. 

Walking over he makes sure to make his footsteps louder than usual so you don't get spooked when he suddenly appears behind you. 

As he opens the door to the bathroom further, the sudden light disorientates him for a moment. He blinks and squints his eyes before he sees your silhouette in front of the sink. The mirror in front of you shows your face, toothbrush hanging limp in your mouth as your eyes stare blankly into nothingness. You look kind of adorable like this, like a puppy that forgot where it was going and just looks off into space. 

It takes him a moment, distracted by seeing you and realizing how much he missed you even for those few hours, to notice the sound. 

Your hand is slapping against the bathroom sink, no rhyme nor reason behind the timing of the hits. Marc cannot discern any pattern behind the slapping. Maybe something you do subconsciously? Well, as long as you didn't hurt yourself he really doesn't mind. 

To get your attention he starts rapping his knuckles against the doorway, not too loud, softly starting a rhythm of his own. Slowly your slapping adjusts to his rhythm until the two of you are synchronizing. 

It takes a few moments until your hand rests flat on the sink, the sound of your tapping fading out as Marc stops his movements too. He watches how your eyes regain focus in your reflection. You blink a few times before you see Marc behind you through the mirror. Toothbrush still in your mouth you turn around to greet him. As your mouth forms the words to your cheery hello the brush tumbles from between your lips onto the bathroom floor. 

Marc chuckles and steps towards you, kneeling down to reach for the toothbrush and hand it to you. "Hey sweetheart," he greets you with a smile, "Sorry for being late. You know you don't have to stay up for me, right?"

You take the brush from him and place it on the sink. "I know, but I like to see you before I go to sleep. Preferably I'd be going to sleep with you in bed with me," you counter and lean down to kiss his cheek sweetly before he gets up from the floor. 

"Hmmm, bed sounds good right about now," he murmurs as he wraps an arm around you and pulls you close. He doesn't mention that you've zoned out, doesn't comment on the toothbrush debacle - that's not important. Important is that he can hold you in his arms. 

You wrinkle your nose at him. "Alright, but you're taking a shower first, Mister." You both laugh and Marc nods, "I get your point. Wait for me in bed?" 

Steven

Your lips pull into a sly grin. "Who said you're taking that shower alone?" 

As he gets home from work, a spring in his step at the thought of coming home to you, Steven is a bit worried when you don't respond to him calling your name. 

"Love?" he calls nervously into your shared apartment. As he walks into the living room he sees you staring at a book, your fingers tapping rhythmically against your thigh, the book held tightly in your other hand. 

He tilts his head quizzically, watching you in silence for a moment. You looked like you weren't even reading, your eyes just staring blankly at the pages in front of you. 

Steven doesn't know what to do. He doesn't want to scare you of course but you seem so lost in thought. The dull sound of your fingers tapping against your thigh echoes through the room. He doesn’t even dare breathe, afraid he may spook you with even that. 

Very quietly Steven makes his way over to you, the couch leaving enough space for him to fit comfortably beside you. 

You feel the weight on the couch shift, the subtle difference slowly pulling you back to reality. Steven freezes as you blink at him owlishly. With an embarrassed smile he waves at you. 

"Hiya, love," you watch him lean closer, taking a not so subtle peak at your book, "You ok?" 

"Yeah, I just spaced out a little. I didn't even hear you come in," you respond a little embarrassed. Steven just smiles at you kindly. "Ah don't worry, love. Happens to the best of us," he tells you with a wink. 

Jake

Carefully you put your book to the side, placing a bookmark where you left off and lean into Steven. He wraps his arm around you, pulling you close as you cuddle. 

As Jake enters your shared flat, his hat safely placed onto a coat rack, the sounds of something repeatedly hitting the granite counter and of something bubbling echoes from the kitchen. Curious, Jake walks over to investigate the noise and is greeted by the sight of you. 

You're standing at the counter, back turned to Jake. Your gaze seems fixated on the bubbling pot in front of you, a delicious scent emanating from it, as your hand repeatedly hits the granite counter next to the stove. 

Your hand is inching a little too close to the hot stove for Jake's liking, so without thinking he steps forward and gently grabs your wrist. You flinch, looking at him with wide eyes. "Perdón, mi vida. I didn't mean to startle you," Jake raises your hand up towards him and places a soft kiss on the inside of your wrist, an apologetic smile on his face. Your gaze softens and you lean forward to press your lips to his cheek and return his kiss.

"It's ok. I zoned out a little and didn't notice you." He hums thoughtfully and carefully lets go of your wrist. "I noticed. I was worried you might hurt yourself by accident, mi alma," Jake replies and points at the hot stove that still has a pot bubbling on top of it. You nod in understanding. As you turn back to your cooking, unsure what else to say, you feel Jake wrap his arms around you from behind.

"I know you can't control when you zone out, just as much as we can't control who fronts most of the time just…," he trails off and you can feel the nervous energy practically radiating off of him. You lean into his embrace. "I'll try to be more careful. Please don't worry too much about me, baby."

You can feel him smile against your skin as he kisses your neck softly. "I know you are capable of keeping yourself safe, mi vida. Just let me worry a little."

With a soft laugh you nod, "Just a little."

[writingoddess1125]

Modern AU Buggy X Reader

Buggy x GnReader

Just fluffy Headcanon!

• Buggy is the leader of a budget theater group that he spends nights writing or getting his people to practice for local shows- during the day however he has his own Boat Charter company and a second business of a delivery company.

• Has Rhinophyma and Roseaca which is why his nose is so large and red. Hates it and has been to so many dermatologist to get it fixed- but due to blood flow and other things will have it for life.

• Has a deep anger towards his half brother Shanks- He feels like their mentor Gol D Roger's who owned a large shipping company when he died it should have been Shanks who owned the shop to keep the legacy alive. Buggy would have been willing to follow Shanks if he did this since he knew he cohldnt- But Shanks ended up just leaving town and Buggy trying to keep it together before it finally went belly up.

• Secretly wanted to be an actor but never got the chops for it due to his nose-

• When you first meet Buggy its at one of the plays, it's a fun improve night. While not many people are there you go with some friends since you found the tickets online.

• You're one of the few people that actually play along with the act and seem to be enjoying themselves. Instead of half drunk college students that got the tickets off groupon-

• He has you come down to the stage and does a whole improve act with you, Being such a good sport you end up helping him get the crowd more engaged.

• Buggy invites you to do shows with him which you agree to. Hum giving you his number in exchange

• Showing up every Thursday to the improv nights and you start becoming friends with his theater group. Noticing how Buggy seemed much happier as you got along with everyone-

• After a few months he works up the courage to ask you out on a date, which you gladly accept.

• At first he tries to take you to the most expensive places but when you express he doesn't have to spend money to show he lives you- He gets more creative and thoughtful.

• Walks through the beach, coffee dates, going to musicals together.

• His favorite are movie nights, He will show off his limited cooking skills aka Hot Dogs and a assortment of junk food while the two of you watch mostly terrible F Tier movies together.

- "Which one did you find?" You call out from the kitchen getting some soda for yourself and Buggy.

"It's called Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter {OP note: This is a real movie- absolutely awful}" Buggy yelled out, laughing at just the name as you jump onto the big couch and hand him his drink as he eats some chips.

"That sounds absolutely awful" You say, looking at the cheap movie cover and reading the back with a snort. Buggy nods, patting himself on the back for finding such garbage.

"It truly is, I've outdone myself" He says proudly before the two of you start the terrible adventure. Having to pause the movie at times for laughing so damn hard-

"This is so bad!" You say as you laugh and roll on the floor- Buggy no better. However he wiped the tears from his eyes as he caught his breath.

"While we can laugh at least he made a movie-" He pointed out with a shrug, you sitting next to him and raising a eyebrow at the oddly kind words from Buggy.

"What do you mean?"

"I always wanted to make a movie- But I doubt anyone would watch them.. they barely watch my shows" He muttered, his insecurities getting to him as he subconsciously touched his nose. You reaching over and grabbing his hand quickly, kissing his lips to snap him from his terrible thoughts.

"What are you talking about?! I think your shows are great and I know you'd do a fantastic job making a movie!" You proclaimed loudly with a smile, your Boyfriend turning and staring hard at you.

He stares at you- like youd said the craziest thing ever. You feeling a creep of worry going up your back at how he was looking at you

"What is your ring size?" He finally ask and gestures to your ring finger making you blush deeply red.

[samkiszkasfacialhair]

Vengeance

Vengeance

Pairing: Josh Kiszka and Female Reader

Summary: “When people misbehave, they get punished. That’s how they learn, ya know?”

Warnings: Pit viper Josh, punishment sex, degradation, dominant Josh, bondage (tying hands/wrists and blindfolding), use of the word “slut,” “slave,” and “whore,” puppy play (kind of), forced blow job, gagging, breath control, mention of vomit, humiliation, teasing, rough unprotected sex, impact to the face, spitting. 

Word Count: 6.5k

To say you planned to make Josh fall apart would be an understatement. However you never thought he’d turn the tables on you. 

As you stood there, with a metal shelf pressed against your back and your hands tied above your head with the strings of your bikini top, trying to figure out how to get yourself free, you thought back to the series of events that led you to this moment. 

It was a Kiszka family weekend. Their parents and sister had planned to come to see a show in a few days and the guys had the weekend free, which called for family activities. 

Each of the boys organized something. Jake booked everyone hotel rooms, Sam made reservations and covered the cost of all the dinners, and Josh booked the daily activities- which he specifically was very excited for, because you were staying by a lake. 

Josh rented a boat for one of the afternoons- something the entire family would enjoy.

So, a few days ago, you rush-shipped a new bikini and coverup for the trip and the day before leaving, it showed up at your front door.

Perfect.

It was a dark green cheeky bikini with little white flowers embroidered on it that was held together by just a few strings. It was cute however, it was a bit smaller in real life than it was according to the pictures online.

But the way it hugged and accentuated every part of your body that you wanted it to perfectly when you tried it on gave you a boost of confidence and not to mention, a few dirty thoughts- thoughts that you were sure were bound to cross Josh’s mind too. Besides, you loved time off with him. He wasn't as tired as he was during show days and you had more time for "activities."

He was going to love it, that much you were sure of.

But, you remembered, you’d also be around his family. So of course, you also purchased a cover up. The cover up was an off white knitted dress that would do its job for when you were around the family or at public places throughout the day. 

You packed bags for yourself and Josh and right before zipping up the bags, you admired to yourself how your new bathing suit unintentionally but probably subconsciously matched the one Josh was set to bring- white swim trunks with a subtle pattern of green accented shapes. You threw it on top of yours and zipped the suitcase.

***

“Sam just texted me that he’s leaving now so he’ll be at the dock in a few minutes. You ready?” Josh asked as he laid on the bed of your hotel room on his phone, not bothering to look up to you as you walked out of the bathroom.

“Mhm,” you hummed, giving yourself one last look in the mirror.

“Oka- Woah. No. Absolutely not,” Josh protested at the sight of you.

“What?” you asked as you continued to put your earrings in.

“The outfit! No!” he said with a chuckle coming off his lips as if it was all a big prank.

Instantly, you put on the charm.

“You don’t like it?” you asked innocently.

He sighed, rolled off the bed, and came over to where you were standing, clasping his hands behind your back and pulling you close to him.

“Don’t be like that, Mama. It’s just… a lot. Well, actually, it’s not a lot at all. You’re practically wearing nothing. I mean, my parents are gonna be there today,” he explained, getting a good look at you.

You gave him a little pout, dropped your chin, and looked at him through your lashes to hit him with your best puppy dog look. 

There was no sense in arguing. Josh knew you could be a bit of a handful at times and after all, that was something about you that he had to admit he loved- something that turned him on, even.

He laughed to himself and shook his head, “God, what am I gonna do with you?”

“Love you too, Baby,” you said sweetly as you gave him a quick kiss and a pat on his butt. 

After grabbing your bags and a case of beer, you Josh walked out of the hotel, and down to the dock to the boat he had rented hand in hand. You were the last ones to arrive- as usual with him. 

It was hot out but cloudy, and the breeze from the water was perfect. However, despite the clouds, Josh had on a pair of sunglasses. Pit Viper sunglasses to be exact. He loved them. You hated them. They made him look like a douche bag and he knew it. But, with you wearing a skimpy bikini that he didn’t exactly approve of, he figured he should include something you weren’t exactly a huge fan of as part of his outfit for the day. It was only fair.

Josh made a grand entrance upon stepping onto the boat, holding up the case of beer he brought and screaming out to his family to let them know the two of you had arrived.

The boat was big. It had a few decks as well as a full indoor living area, kitchen, and even a bedroom. There were also stairs leading down to an unlit area which you assumed led to storage and technical stuff.

After greeting his parents and sister, you sat down on a white padded bench near Sam who was was sitting crisscrossed on the deck of the boat while his girlfriend had her hands in his hair, tugging it this way and that as she put two French braids in it to keep it from blowing wildly in the wind.

“You look handsome with your hair like that, Sammy,” you said sweetly to him. 

“Thank you! You look lovely today by the way,” he replied.

You smiled at Sam’s compliment and looked at Josh with an I told you so look on your face. 

“Hm. At least Sammy thinks I look nice,” you whispered to him.

“I never said you didn’t” he said sternly as his jaw clench and he swallowed hard.

He lifted your legs up onto his lap and ran his free hand up and down them a few times before resting his hand just above your knee, almost as if he was claiming you.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish,” he warned in your ear, just above a whisper as the boat started moving. 

You opened your mouth to give him a smartass reply but stopped yourself when his dad stood in front of the two of you, handing you each a drink.

“You like black cherry, right?” his dad asked with a Whiteclaw extended to you.

“Yes, it’s my favorite, thank you!” you answered with a smile as you grabbed it from his hand. 

Josh took a can of beer from his dad, cracked it open, gulped down almost half of it right off the bat. 

“Slow down, Baby, no one’s taking it from you,” you giggled as you brought your hand to the back of his neck and swirled your fingers through the curls at the bottom of his head.

He swallowed and brought the ice cold can to your legs, using them as a table and sending shivers throughout your body.

As the boat sailed through the water, everyone drank, talked, and laughed. Everyone except Josh, who was quieter than usual. He was good at masking his emotions though. No one seemed to pick up on it except you. After all, you knew exactly why he was quiet. 

What you wanted to happen, was happening. It was only a matter of time before he broke.

Soon, the boat anchored at a shallower area of the lake. The captain informed you all that the water was about twenty feet deep, making it safe and suitable for jumping off the boat and swimming.

“You guys going in?” Jake asked the two of you, standing up and unbuttoning the black overshirt he had on. 

Josh looked over at you and raised his eyebrows, silently asking you if you wanted to go in. 

You didn’t answer Josh. Instead, you eyed Jake up and down, making sure Josh saw you do so.

“Yeah,” you said, replying not to Josh, but to Jake.

You sat up and gave Josh a small smile. He didn’t smile back. Instead, he tipped his sunglasses down so you could see his eyes which were strong and giving you a warning look.

Ignoring the “knock it off” look, you gave him a quick peck on the lips before taking off your white knitted cover up. When you pulled it over your head, instantly, you caught Sam and Jake’s eyes on you, despite their own girlfriends being there.

Sam was obvious. His eyes practically burned a hole into the fabric of your bikini. With her hands still braiding his hair, his girlfriend jerked his head around and he winced as his hair got pulled, a seemingly intentional move on her part.

Jake, at least, was smarter about it, hiding behind a pair of round black sunglasses and raising his beer can to his lips, taking a sip to hide his smile.

Even their dad gave Josh an approving look and a raise of his eyebrows. 

Josh handled each of them as he stood up to follow you.

He smacked the unbraided side of Sam’s head as he walked by him. 

He laughed his dad off as respectfully as he could. 

And as he walked by Jake, who was standing on the edge of the boat, he gave him a push and watched him fall into the water below him. 

The sound of his body hitting the water was all you heard until you looked over to see him laughing with just his head out of the water, his body completely invisible as it emerged in the dark lake water surrounding him. 

“You dick!” he shouted jokingly, “You better get your ass in here and bring me a new beer!”

Josh turned to you, pulling you in tight by your waist, “You heard your boyfriend,” he teased, “better get your ass in there,” he said, smirking.

“Jealous?” you asked sweetly.

He looked down at your chest and then back to your face.

 “No,” he answered, stretching out the word fighting back a smile. 

“Yeah, we’ll see about that,” you said as you gave him a peck and jumped off the boat and into the water with Jake. 

Immediately, Josh followed behind you and eventually, Sam, his girlfriend, Jake’s girlfriend, and Ronnie were all in the water with you.

After a while of swimming with the group, having canned drinks thrown down to you all by their parents, and Sam and Jake swimming away to pee, you started to get cold and the group of you got back onto the boat before it took off again to head to another location in the lake. 

As you sat on the top deck in just your bikini, with your legs in Josh’s lap, the sun started burning off the clouds little by little, making the day grow hotter, which was nice considering you were in a cold, wet bathing suit.

“You’re getting a little pink, Baby,” you said, pressing your fingertips onto Josh’s sunkissed shoulder and releasing them to see a small pale dot linger behind before returning to the same color pink around it.

“Yeah you can still burn even with the overcast,” Sam interjected, squinting up to the sky. 

Josh rolled his eyes. Sam didn’t have that problem and he never did. Sam’s skin always held strong under just one layer of SPF 30 all day while Jake and Josh would be better off reapplying SPF 50 every hour. Sam’s comment also didn’t help with Josh already annoyed at him. 

“You want 50?” his dad asked, holding out a can of sunscreen.

“Ah, yes, that’s perfect,” you said, standing up and reaching for the can from his dad, making sure you pushed your ass and tits out just a bit more than your normally would, “Thank you!”

“Course,” his dad replied.

Josh grabbed your wrist to stop you from twisting the nozzle open, “Actually, you wanna go inside with me? Get a drink and be in the shade for a little?” he asked quietly.

“M’kay,” you replied, getting up, handing his dad the can of sunscreen back, and following him inside the boat as the sounds of his family members talking and laughing muffled with the closing the glass door behind you. 

“I want to make something very clear to you,” he said as he pulled you down the stairs by your arm and swung you around to face him once you reached the landing and were out of earshot of the captain of the boat.

The way he whipped you around made your breath hitch in your throat and you exhaled hard as your eyes met his and he continued speaking through his teeth. 

“You want to dress like a slut? Act like a slut? I will treat you like a slut. And then we’ll see just how you like it, hm?”

You looked at yourself in the reflection of his sunglasses and smiled just a bit, tugging at your bottom lip with your teeth. You hated those sunglasses but you were so thankful for them right now. You had to admit, you loved seeing what he saw as you looked at the reflection in them. And right now, all you saw was a little brat who deserved whatever was coming her way.

If he wanted to, you’d let him take you on the stairs right then and there for anyone to see. That’s how bad you wanted and needed him right now. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said sweetly, playing dumb.  

“Really?” he asked rehtorically, “You think I didn’t notice all that shit you pulled with my brothers out there? Hm? And my fucking dad?”

“I was being nice. Unlike you who got a little attitude all of a sudden,” you said fighting back a smile. 

You knew you weren’t just being nice.

“Yeah the way you were looking at Jake was really nice, wasn’t it?”

“You know what, I think you are jealous after all,” you replied.

“And I think, you need to be taught a lesson,”

“So teach me then,” you said, crossing your arms in front of you, making sure you pushed your tits up just a bit with it.

That was it and you knew it. Those four words sent Josh to his breaking point and the look on his face proved it.

Josh smiled, shook his head, and let out a laugh through his mouth as he traced his bottom teeth with his tongue. 

“Teach you? Oh I’ll teach you,” he said as he pulled onto your arm and led you down the narrow corridor of the basement of the boat and into a small room that was seemingly reserved for the crew members. 

He slammed the door behind him and twisted the dead bolt to lock it. 

He flicked on a light switch to reveal that you were both standing in a storage closet, containing just a utility sink and a metal wire shelf that was stocked from ceiling to floor with cleaning supplies.

“What’s your word, Mama?” he asked with his hands in his hair, untying the white bandana that he was wearing.

“Red,” you said clearly.

“And what if you can’t talk?”

“Shake my head three times.”

“Perfect,” he said, smiling at you and then turning his attention to the bandana between his fingers as he gave it a good tug. 

There was a ball of anxiety in your stomach that was more excited than nervous or fearful. The two of you had experimented with stuff like this before. You trusted Josh with everything in you and even though you knew he was about to completely ruin you for his own pleasure and entertainment, you knew you were in good hands. After all, this is what you hoped for.

“Now,” he began as he spun you around, grabbed your wrists and held them together in his hand behind your back, “I don’t give a fuck about your pleasure. I don’t give a fuck if you cum. You misbehaved. And when people misbehave…” he paused for a second to tug the bandana tight around your wrists, “They get punished. That’s how they learn. Ya know?”

All your body would let out was a hum in agreement as Josh grabbed your shoulders and spun you around forcefully, manhandling you.

“So,” he whispered as he brought his face close to yours, “It’s time for you to learn so this doesn't happen again,” he said as he flicked the tip of your nose.

He used one hand to sneak to the back of your neck and untie your bikini top. In just a few seconds, the strings were undone and the top came tumbling down, exposing your bare chest to him. The second string that wrapped around your back was still in place though, keeping the two triangles of the top just dangling over your stomach, swinging back and forth as you moved your body.

The same hand continued down your chest and he swirled his fingertips over your nipple lightly, causing your back to arch involuntarily at his touch.

“Mmm, feels good?” he asked softly with his mouth an inch away from yours.

“Yeah,” you breathed out in a whisper, closing your eyes and subconsciously bringing your face closer to go in to kiss him. A kiss which never happened because Josh pulled his face back.

In a second, a sinister chuckle left his lips and a sharp pain rang through your chest as he pinched and pulled upward on your nipple.

“Don’t get used to it,” he said bluntly, giving it one last tug before ripping his fingers from you.

“Get on your knees,” he commanded as he crossed his arms over his chest.

You did as he said and dropped down so that your face was at eye level with the bulge in his swim trunks.

“What are you waiting for? Take ‘em off,” he said sharply.

“Josh,” you said bluntly, “I can’t,” you emphasized your words, reminding him that your hands were tied behind your back. 

He didn’t need to be reminded. He didn’t care.

“Get creative. You’ll find a way.”

You looked up at his face and then down at his shorts which were at eye level. All you had was your mouth. 

Inching closer to him on your knees, you took your teeth to the waistband of his shorts right by his hip bone, and tugged down. 

They came down an inch on one side and you crawled to the other side of him and did the same there.

Back and forth you went, on your knees, tugging Josh’s trunks down an inch at a time on each side, looking absolutely pathetic, as he stood from above and watched with a smirk on his face, laughing at you. You couldn’t even see his eyes through his sunglasses, all you saw was yourself, his slave, in the reflection of them.

After getting his shorts down about halfway and struggling to get them to come off past his bulge, he had had enough and he pulled his shorts down the rest of the way, fully revealing his hard cock to you. 

“Suck it,” he commanded.

You looked up at him, licked your lips, and leaned forward to take his dick in your mouth. 

The second the tip of his dick pushed past your lips he let out a sigh of pleasure and grabbed the back of your head.

Instantly, he started using his hands to guide you. He used your hair as leverage, pulling at your roots and pushing down on your head as he moved you back and forth. It felt good- that little sting that came with each pull. 

Normally, you’d be able to add some “technique” to sucking his dick. You’d use your hands and twist them around his shaft. You’d be able to go at your own pace, starting slow and sucking the tip the way he liked it. You could swirl your tongue around the head of his dick or cup his balls to send him over the edge a bit. But not this time. All you had was your open mouth. He was in control of everything. 

In a way, you were glad he was. You could barely keep your own balance due to not being able to use your hands and water dripping from both your bathing suits and your hair had made the floor just a bit slippery below your knees, causing them to slide around a bit. Not to mention, you were on a moving boat.

However, him being in control of everything meant he was going to use you just the way he wanted to.

Quickly, he picked up the pace.

Josh let go of your hair and his hands gripped the sides of your head and pulled you back and forth on his dick with force a few times.

But that wasn’t enough for him. He stilled his hands, kept your head steady, and started thrusting his hips into you, fucking your face. 

The gargle sounds that started in your throat and came out of your mouth as the saliva collected in your open mouth and began dripping onto your chin were something you’d only ever heard in porn before. 

He looked down at you the entire time and you looked up at him, watching yourself in the reflection of his sunglasses. You could see and feel your own saliva dripping down between your tits.

With every thrust, his sunglasses slid further and further off his nose and you flinched as they came down, just missing your face, and hitting the floor to your left. 

He stopped for a minute with his dick still in your mouth and both turned your eyes to the floor where you could just faintly see the sunglasses in your peripheral vision.

“Pick ‘em up,” he instructed and he pushed your head off of his dick backwards.

You wiggled your body around and leaned sideways awkwardly to grab at them, but you were unsuccessful. You tried a few times, grabbing them with your fingers before dropping them time after time. The way your wrists were tied up didn’t allow your hands for much movement. Not to mention the way you had to bend around was difficult and was stretching your back in painful ways, causing you to wince and whine as you tried. 

You sat back on your heels and looked up at him, defeated and out of breath. 

He laughed, “You are absolutely pathetic, Baby. Come on, I thought you were smarter than this.” 

You looked at the glasses on the floor again and sighed. Still sitting on your heels, you turned yourself around, giving him a view of your ass with your hands tied right above it, which you were sure he loved.

And just as he wanted you to, like nothing but an obedient dog, you leaned down and with your mouth, picked up the glasses and crawled back around to present them to him.

He reached down and cupped the side of your face gently, a contrast to how he had been handing you for the past few minutes.

“That’s a good girl,” he cooed the same way he would reward Sam’s dog for doing a trick, as he took the sunglasses from your mouth. 

You fully expected him to put them back on his own face but instead, he reached down and put them on you. 

In any normal circumstance, this would be a soft act of kindness. But not in this one. This was just another way of humiliating and degrading you, and the next words out of his mouth proved it.

“There we go, that’s better,” he said softly and sweetly, before his tone changed as he continued, “Yeah,” he laughed, “I don't even want to look at you.”

He stroked himself a few times before he continued, “Now, is my good little puppy ready for her treat? Open,” he said as he grabbed the back of your head and forced you onto his dick once more and held you there. 

You gagged around his dick as it hit the back of your throat. You concentrated on breathing through your nose as your throat closed around his dick. You were swallowing his cock and your own saliva all while fighting back vomit that you could feel forcing its way up your throat. 

Tears welled up in your eyes ran down your face, causing the inside of the glasses to fog up to the point where you could no longer see anything. 

He kept one hand on the back of your head and used the other one to take hold of your nose and squeeze your nostrils shut.

At that point, you had lost feeling in your arms, you couldn’t see, and now you couldn’t breathe. 

The only thing you could do was feel him using you and take it. Your mouth was nothing but a hole for Josh to use to get himself off. Every ounce of dignity was stripped from you. The only thing that even provided you with the slightest bit of it was your bathing suit bottoms that were still intact but pooling with your own wetness as Josh continued fucking your face.

You were a second away from shaking your head to get him to stop when he shoved you away aggressively, allowing you to suck in a massive and well earned breath as well as close your mouth to swallow properly for the first time in what felt like forever. 

He pushed the glasses up onto your forehead, allowing you to regain your sense of sight, and both of you watched a string of saliva connecting your mouth to his dick stretch and eventually break apart into two pieces landing on his thigh and your chest. 

Breathing with your mouth open to catch your breath, you sat back on your heels and looked up at him, desperately, as he looked down at you with a pleased expression on his face. 

You were practically panting to catch your breath when he reached down and lifted your chin to close your mouth.

“Close your mouth, Baby, you look like a whore.”

No shit.

He held onto your cheeks and smooshed them together, hard, causing your lips to part and letting all the excess saliva ooze between your teeth, bubble out, and dribble down your chin.

For just a fraction of a second, he smiled at you. It was so brief that if you would have blinked in that exact second, you wouldn’t have seen it. 

And just as quickly, his expression was serious again as he released your cheeks from his grip with a push to your face. 

With that same hand, he swirled your hair around his wrist and held it tight in a makeshift ponytail in his fist before using it to yank you up to your feet. 

You winced as he pulled you up forcefully, feeling your neck stretch as your legs tried to keep up with how quickly he was pulling.

As he pulled you up, you slipped around on the floor which was not only covered in lake water, but now drops of your own saliva. Josh held you steady for a moment with each of his hands gripping your upper arms. 

He spun you around, freed your wrists, and spun you around again so that you were now facing him.

He threw the bandana to the floor on top of his disregarded swim trunks.

“Take that off,” he commanded, jutting his chin out toward your bikini top that was hanging by one loose knot just below your ribcage.

Careful not to drop it, you untied it, pulled it off, and handed it to him, unsure of the next plan he had for you. 

“That little bratty mouth of yours served me well, Mama. But now,” he said as he held your wrists together in front of you and wrapped the bikini top strings around them a couple times, “Let’s see what that pussy can do for me, hm?”

He walked you backwards a few steps until your back made contact with the metal shelf behind you, causing you to shiver from how cold it was.

He raised your tied wrists over your head and using the rest of the bikini top, he secured your wrists to the top wire shelf, wrapping the string around in the most unconventional way and creating knots that would be close to impossible to undo.

He gave your wrists a yank and when they didn’t detach from the shelf or slip out of the ties, he smiled to himself with satisfaction. 

He walked around to the front of you and looked you up and down.

“Comfortable?”

“No,” you whined as you moved around a bit, struggling.

“Aw that’s too bad, Mama. You look so pretty like this. All desperate and helpless. Nothing but a whore for a good fuck,” he said as he sucked his teeth and gave you a condescending pout.

He took one finger, starting at your wrist, and ran it down the inside of your entire arm.

You squirmed as his finger brushed over your armpit and down to your nipple, giving it a flick before his hand came up to your chin. 

With his other hand, he grabbed the front of your bikini bottom and pulled tight, letting the fabric create a burning friction between your folds. 

You let out a whimper of pain. 

“Jo-” you whined.

“Shhhh,” he said, shushing you but also finishing the last sound of his name that you whined out.

He let go and the elastic in the bottoms snapped back onto your skin with a sting. He pushed the crotch of your bikini bottom to the side, feeling around with his fingers- feeling the wetness that had accumulated. Slowly, he dipped two fingers inside you and pulled them back out.

“You like all this a bit too much, don’t you?” he asked in a sweet voice, “Maybe a bit more than you should?”

He was right. You liked this more than you should. A lot more than you should. Any sane person would find this completely humiliating and degrading. But surprisingly, this got you more turned on than anything. 

You wanted Josh to use you. You wanted him to treat you like an object- not a person- nothing but a masturbation tool for him. 

You nodded in response as he pulled his wet fingers up and held them in between both of your faces, rubbing them back and forth, inspecting what was left on them.

“You know, I’m starting to think you planned this whole thing,” he said, smiling sinisterly, "You're smarter than you look,"

He picked up the bandana off the floor and wiped his fingers with it before balling it up and shoving it in your mouth.

“You like how you taste?” he asked with his hand covering your mouth tight.

“Mhm,” you said with your voice muffled from both the bandana and his hand.

“I’m gonna give you something that you’re really gonna like then,” he whispered as he lifted your leg up and placed your foot on the ledge of the utility sink next to you. 

Still holding the crotch of your bottoms to the side with one hand, he lined himself up with your entrance and then held onto your hip with his other hand as he slid inside you, bottoming out and filling you up completely. 

He started off slow, pulling out most of the way before filling you up again. However, he quickly picked up the speed and pressure, pushing your back into the metal shelf behind you with every thrust. 

That familiar dull ache began forming deep in your stomach as he kept going. It would come and go with his movements. Normally, you’d be able to tell him what to do to make you cum and he’d do it happily. But not this time. Right now, you knew your place. You were his toy, nothing but a set of holes for him to jack off into. Your pleasure meant absolutely nothing to him, he said it himself. If you asked him for anything to help you get closer to a release, he’d do the opposite and laugh at you.

As he continued, you felt the string of your bikini bottom come loose and fall over your leg and his. You looked down to see the strings dangling from your body and swung around between the two of you.

Upon looking down, the glasses that he had rested on the top of your head, once again, fell to the floor. But this time, Josh paid them no mind.

Instead, he pushed on your left leg that was held up by the sink and used your thigh for leverage, allowing himself to go in at a deeper angle as his other hand white knuckled the shelf behind you.

He grunted and breathed hard through his teeth while you whimpered in both pain and pleasure while biting down hard on the now soaked bandana.

All it took was one particularly deep and hard thrust to send a pornographic combination of expletives and moans from your mouth into the air.

“Oh God, Josh! FUCK!” you screamed, letting the now saliva soaked bandana to fall to the floor. 

Josh reached his hand up to your face laid his entire palm on your cheek with a hard slap before forcing four of his fingers into the side of your mouth and pulling your lips apart as he hooked his hand around so the palm of it was on your cheek and he was pressing your head back into the shelf as he continued fucking you.

“Come on, Mama, louder. Let ‘em all hear. You’re lucky I’m not fucking you up there, letting Sammy and Jake have their turns too. Bet you’d love that, wouldn’t you? Keep it in the family, huh? You wanna fuck my dad too? Be my new step mom? You want that, don’t you? Disgusting.”

“No,” you argued back.

But with his hand prying your mouth open, you couldn’t get your lips or tongue to make the right N sound, which in turn made you sound the most pathetic you ever have.

“I’m sorry you’ll have to enunciate. What was that?” he asked with a chuckle coming off his lips, knowing damn well you loved being his little fuck toy and you were his to humiliate.

“I aid o!” you attempted to say.

“Oh you said no? Didn’t seem like it considering you’re all over them, wearing this slutty little bikini. Oh you look so handsome Sammy! Good for nothing but sucking and fucking,” he said, pushing into you harder as he spoke those specific words.

He started slamming into you mercilessly. The shelf behind you began moving and hitting the wall with each thrust with a thud. Paper towel rolls began falling from the top shelf onto the floor. Bottles of soap and cleaning products began falling over on the shelves as Josh pushed you into it.

Despite all that, Josh didn’t stop. Instead, he put his foot up on the bottom rung of the shelf and lifted his hips up underneath you, pushing himself deeper than ever before.

That was it. That was all it took to send you over the edge. The building feeling in your stomach came to a peak right there and exploded.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head and you watched the inside of your eyelids flicker open and close as you felt yourself tighten around Josh’s dick with your orgasm pulsing through your body. 

It was like nothing you’d ever experienced before. It was deep and strong and well earned.

The sounds that came out of your mouth were unintelligible. 

He fucked you through your orgasm and right into his, letting out a deep moan as he released himself inside you. He closed his eyes tight and furrowed his eyebrow as waves of visible pleasure filled his entire body causing his body to twitch as they hit.

When he finished, he stilled his movements and let go of your face; and the two of you, with your faces less than an inch apart, just stared at each other in awe, breathing heavily. Almost like neither of you could believe any of that just happened. 

Gently, he cupped your face, as if he was silently asking you if you were okay. It was like time stopped for just a second with him.

“You’re so pretty,” he whispered, looking at you with a genuine softness in his eyes.

He broke eye contact and looked down as he pulled himself out of you. Slowly, he lowered your leg back to the ground before cleaning himself off in the sink. He splashed cold water on his face and shook it off. You watched him as you felt the warmness of his cum starting to drip out of you.

Josh reached down to the bottom shelf next to you and uncapped a plastic bottle of water. 

“Open,” he said as he lifted your chin up and poured water in your mouth carefully in an act of kindness.

You swallowed a few times and he pulled the bottle away, letting the excess water drip down your chin, neck, and chest. 

He gulped down what was left in the bottle and when he was done, he pulled his shorts back on and stood back, admiring his work. 

Your hair was a mess- half wet, half dry, and tangled. There was black makeup streaming down your face. Saliva, both wet and dry, had run from your mouth, to your chin, and down to your stomach, leaving a wet spot on the top of the crotch of your bikini bottoms, which were hanging on loosely by one hip as his cum dripped down your inner thigh. 

Finally, to put the finishing touches on his masterpiece, he got his face close to yours and expecting a kiss, you lifted your chin to him. 

“Now,” he began, “What do you say?” he said softly, letting the word “say” draw out a bit.

“Thank y-,” you started to say when you were interrupted by Josh spitting on your face.

You flinched as it hit your face.

He aimed for your mouth but missed by just a bit, landing just below your bottom lip, giving his saliva no choice but to trickle down your chin and then down your chest, where it fell in and mixed with every other bodily fluid imaginable. 

He picked up his sunglasses and bandana from the floor and ran them under water in the sink. 

“Well,” he said casually as he laid the bandana across the edge of the sink to dry and shook the excess water off the glasses, “I’m gonna go take a nap so, I’ll see you later, Mama.”

“You’re seriously not going to get me out of this?” you asked with your hands still tied to the shelf.

“Eh,” he said, “You’re smart, I’m sure you’ll figure something out,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders as he opened the door and shut it behind him, flicking off the lights as he left, leaving you there as you were. 

In the darkness you moved around a bit until a little green blinking light above the door caught your eye.

A security camera.

Fuck.

Author’s Note: I’m so sorry (no I’m not).

[miyu-d]

Ace with the tailor reader part 2

A/N: @boomboom-tanjiro2019 it made me so happy when you requested a part 2. Here it is. I'm sorry it took me some time. Hope you'll enjoy this...

[ Part 1 ]

Everyone was so happy about Ace's arrival and threw a party to celebrate. They were talking and laughing so loudly when you went there after finishing your work. It was more lively than other days. Chopper was showing his chopstick dance to Ace, and he was laughing at it. Then Sanji came out of nowhere and served you a drink.

"Neeehhh~ Y/N-chwan! I brought you your favorite..."

"Thank you, Sanji-kun." You smiled and took the drink.

When you gave your attention back to Ace, he was already looking at you, resting his chin on his hand. A spark ran through your body, and your legs felt a little numb when you saw the way he was looking at you. A small smile curled in the corner of his mouth. His eyes were talking, looking deep into your soul. That moment was so intimidating; you felt time had stopped, and only two of you were in the room. You looked back into Ace's eyes with the same passion, subconsciously. Only a few seconds passed, but it felt like forever.

You snapped out of it when you heard Chopper screaming and yelling. Both of you immediately broke the eye contact and looked at him. You got relaxed for a moment when you saw it was nothing serious, just Luffy playing with Chopper.

But you didn't have the guts to look back at Ace again. You walked towards a seat in the corner, hoping no one else saw what happened between you and Ace.

(Actually, only Robin saw it. She giggled a little to herself and went back to reading her book.)

At night, you went to the spot on the ship where you loved to sit and draw new designs while enjoying the sea breeze. You kept thinking about what kind of outfit you could make for Ace. Even though you had so many ideas when you first met him, now you can't imagine him wearing anything other than his significant outfit—no top, just a short with some accessories.

You leaned back more comfortably and looked out at the calm sea. After a few minutes passed, you let out a huge sigh and opened your sketch book. You felt the presence of someone, so you lifted your head up and looked. You saw Ace watching you, leaning over the railing.

"How long have you been there?"

"Not so long," Ace said, slowly walking towards you. "So... what are you doing there?"

"Nothing special. Just... trying to design some new clothes, I guess..."

"Can I see?"

He was really interested in it. So you showed him your designs and explained them to him. You had no one to talk to about this before. So you enjoyed telling him everything. You talked his ears off. Ace also enjoyed listening to your ramblings. He shared his thoughts about them too... You two became more comfortable with each other.

"I don't like this one."

"Whaaaaaaat?? That is one of my favorites."

"But it's too plain."

"That makes it more elegant."

"Add some sequins or something."

"Nope. Not gonna happen. This is perfect."

Ace gave you a pouty face. He sat down on the floor and started to mutter to himself.

"Oh, come on, Ace~" You also went and sat down next to him. "Fine, I will design a new dress the way you want. So leave that one alone. Okay?"

He stayed pouty.

"Okay?" You peaked to see his face. "Hmm?"

He kept hiding his face from you.

You signed and gave up on pestering him. You leaned on your back and looked up at the sky.

...

"Why do you care about it anyway? Do you want it for your girlfriend or something?"

"What? No!! I don't have anyone!!! It's just..." He blushed and looked away. "I thought it would... look good on you that way."

"Maybe... maybe that plain one, that one you called elegent, or something is also... look good on you."

He gave you a quick look, checked what you were wearing, and looked away again. "That one also looks good on you.."

Ace was so flustered. "Anything looks good on you." He was really a flustered mess.

You tried your best not to laugh. You wondered where that cool and firm Ace had gone. But you loved this side of him more.

You slowly put your head on his shoulder and whisper, "I think anything looks good on you too."

He slowly tilted his head and looked at you. You smiled at him. He blushed and looked away. You couldn't help but chuckle.

You had no idea how you got the confidence to act like this, taking the lea and all. But somehow, you could.

"Let's go" You pulled him by his hand and started walking.

"Where are we going?" Ace let you pull him and followed you.

"You are my new and first fashion model. I'm gonna make you the best outfit ever. (Y/N)'s designs, special edition, one and only, only for you, Ace collection, first outfit."

Both of you chuckled and walked to your sewing room, holding hands and swinging them back and forth.

Masterlist

[yannaryartside]

Carmy will have to decide between two types of love

I keep thinking about why Carmy (possibly) deciding between Claire and Syd is taking so much time on the overall plot of the series. We have used a entire season of him falling for Claire, and my theory is that in this season the Syd vs Claire is gonna be toe to toe, and then in the final season he goes for Syd.

Now, if that happens this way, I have been analysing it from a writers perspectives, how this love stories create Carmen ultimate character arc. I am gonna propose to you two narratives and why I would go for the later. Character analysis ahead.

The Claire option

Walk with me here. If you ship Claire and Carmy and believe the trailers, you could say this whole thing is about Carmy learning to accept love and good things. That is why the last season ended with him rejecting the relationship out of trauma just to realize that Claire loved him. This season could be about him healing to a point where he learns he deserves love, apologizing to Claire, and getting back together. And you know what, that does make sense, writing this show as an exercise for learning to heal childhood wounds. It is clean and makes sense. Then in s4 his new self can make all the good decisions, have a couple of kids, bum you have an arc.

But the background noise, or the clues floating around, to call it something, doesn't make sense. Here insert all the Sydcarmy clues the fandom has talked about.

The show is trying to tell us that Claire is the love Carmy wants because he is trapped in his wounded self mentality.

As I said in this post, Claire's behavior looked extremely naive but manipulative sometimes. Her relationship with his family and the trauma surrounding it. How everybody seems more enthusiastic than him about the relationship at times.

The reason: the wound.

Claire is uncomplicated love, love with no expectations or boundaries, with only space for his needs, never hers. That is the kind of love a child expects from a parent. My theory is that Carmen, being with Claire, wanted to experience that kind of love, the one he didn't get from Donna. with a touch of his teen self fantasies and sex included.

And that also makes sense. Everybody that has been abused, particularly in childhood, will tell you that picking a partner without relying on your wounded self is very difficult.

A little bit of TMI on healing from abuse when you look for a romantic partner: One of the reasons I got into therapy is because I was terrified to end up marrying a man as abusive as my dad was with my mom and me. I had a problematic episode with one of my exboyfriends that made me realize I was repeating specific patterns, even when consciously, I thought I was picking men who didn't act like my father. It is something difficult precisely because you are not aware of it. It is all happening subconsciously.

So maybe that is why the writers want to give Carmen the chance to choose a partner as a healed person (Syd) and not as a wounded person desperate for love (Claire)

You cannot choose a romantic partner looking for the love of a parent, because parent to child love is the only type of unconditional love that can exist. Some therapist will tell you that the only way to cure that lack is with self love and forgiveness, but that is besides the point of this post.

Romantic relationships cannot be unconditional, it is a partnership. There needs to be expectations of grow, sacrifices and compromises, the two people need to get their needs met. You may heal together, but you partner may trigger your wounds sometimes, the same as your other relationships.

Syd definitely forces Carmy to evolve, while Claire enables him and keeps him in his past self.

Now here is where I think the twist of the series will come.

Remember when I said that Carmys core wound is ther he felt he was not good enough for Donna to love him? Because he could not be like Michael? This is the post

Syd is Carmy’s anchor and his peace. She is also characterized as someone who helps people to grow, who gives grace and sincerity when mistakes are made. She is the actually healthy woman/parent he never experienced.

Carmen has not healed his core wound. The lie he believes that he has to go the extra mile to earn people's love. The way he became the best chef in the world, dreaming of just getting a “good job” from his older brother.

But because his wounded self doesn't feel like he can be enough for somebody he actually wants (Syd), he felt for a woman that didn't asked anything of him (Claire).

That (never giving but always receiving) dynamic is what allowed Carmy to accept the relationship in the first place.

Thinking of all this made me realize that not only has Syd been the only person Carmy had chosen for himself (as other posts have brilliantly pointed out), but Syd is literally the only person who can make a relationship with him work. She had seen the worst of him (Donna) and had the capacity to make him think of himself beyound all that, hence the peace that she brings him “you are the best cdc” as in “you are great, you are good, a good partner, a good leader, you are my friend” you are not just the bear (your wounded self). He smiles because the person that he wants can see this even if he doesn't dare to belive it yet.

So I don't know how they could make Carmy realize all of this. I also could be wrong and the meaning of all of this could be something completly different. I also don't know of this opinion is controversial. Let me know what you think. Thank you for reading.

[russellradio]

~to be updated when I post a new fic, so I have them all in one place~

you can find me as bucksclipboard on ao3 💕 kudos and comments make my day!

bucktommy fic masterpost here

be someone (T, 2.4k) | ao3 | rebloggable

A call leaves Buck wondering if he’ll ever be a parent. Not just a donor, a dad. A great dad. Chimney tries to convince him of his qualities – and Eddie has a hard time staying quiet.

or: eddie thinks buck already is someone to chris

will you remember me? (T, 4.5k) | ao3 | rebloggable

You know the trope: Someone suffers from amnesia and they don’t remember their partner. Well, this is the opposite. Buck doesn’t remember a thing – except that he loves Eddie. How is Eddie supposed to tell him they’re not actually together?

for summer of buddie – week 5: break the cliché

nobody compares (G, 1.3k) | ao3 | (ambiguous bucktommy/buddie)

"Sorry", Eddie said and scrunched his nose.

"No, you’re right", Tommy admitted. "I don’t want that. I want to give him something he’ll love."

"Well, then not a gift card. Look, I’ve been a terrible gift giver in relationships, so I’m not judging. But you look like you’re getting a migraine, so maybe… let me help you?"

A deep sigh escaped him. "How?"

or: eddie helps tommy shop for buck's birthday gift and inadvertently makes things worse

unless you're choosing me (T, 4.4k) | ao3 | rebloggable

"Could you check that?", Eddie called from the kitchen. He had insisted to make something for them tonight instead of ordering their usual pizza and ice cream dinner.

"Sure", Buck replied and snatched the phone off the coffee table. He knew the pass code – it was the day Eddie had started working at the 118. There was no new text, just a message from his phone provider, but an earlier conversation was still opened. Before Buck could place the phone back on the table, something caught his eye. Why was Eddie talking to Hen about him?

or: buck reads a text he wasn’t supposed to read

when it all melts down (T, 2.2k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Buck thinks a beach day is the perfect distraction from an empty house and a lack of summer plans. Eddie thinks if Buck walks out of the ocean like a Greek god one more time, he might just lose his mind.

or: there’s only one cure for a frozen tongue after too much ice cream

I wish I could help (E, 2.1k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Eddie is so pent up he can barely focus on his job – and Buck is all too happy to help. That’s just what friends do.

or: I couldn’t find any smut referring to *that* scene in 7x05, so I wrote it

thanks, babe! (T, 1.8k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Eddie accidentally calls Buck babe and refuses to have a meltdown over it. It was just his subconscious betraying him because they were surrounded by couples, right? Right?!

or: I love “accidental” tropes, how did you know

more under the cut

do you want to know a secret (T, 3.2k) | ao3

Buck overworks himself and his family worries. When Eddie overhears a conversation between Maddie and Chimney, he learns he might just have caused Buck’s change in behavior. The good news is – there’s something he can do about it.

or: maddie and chimney worry over pining!buck – eddie takes charge

it's just the thought of you and what I leave behind (T, 6.4k) | ao3 | rebloggable

As the cruise ship starts to sink, Bobby and Athena aren’t the only ones in desperate need of saving. The 118 goes on a high-risk mission and a close call brings Buck and Eddie together.

or: 7x03 reimagined

I let my guard down for a moment (M, 6.5k) | ao3 | rebloggable

"It didn’t stop. Buck went from hoping the packages were from someone special to suspecting someone was toying with him. The hopeless romantic in him was slowly wilting. When he opened the latest letter, suddenly he was not so sure his secret admirer was of the good-natured kind. "

or: who needs police protection when you have eddie diaz by your side?

hold tight, you're slowly coming back to life (T, 3.1k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Eddie runs into Natalia at the grocery store. He learns something about her and Buck’s breakup that gives him the final push to take care of his own complicated love life.

or: what if buck didn’t tell eddie the entire truth

how's your head? (haven't had any complaints) (M, 2.3k) | ao3 | rebloggable

When he glanced over, Buck had already drifted off to sleep. He looked so innocent, Eddie almost couldn’t believe what had come out of his mouth mere seconds ago. Almost. Because he was 100 percent sure he’d heard it.

or: you can’t just make this kind of joke and forget about it

rose-colored boy (T, 1.6k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Buck is draped across an armchair, rambling about rosefinches and Eddie just can’t help himself. In some kind of out-of-body experience, he gives his best friend a completely casual, meaningless (lie!) forehead kiss.

or: yes, another accidental kiss fic because I don’t think there can ever be enough

we should be at the club (E, 2.8k) | ao3 | rebloggable

When Buck hears that Eddie has been going golfing to put himself out there, he offers to be his wingman. The world’s worst wingman. Although, to be fair, Eddie brings his best friend to the club and leaves with a new boyfriend.

or: just an excuse for them to wear tight pants and take them off

8 days a week (E, 6.3k) | ao3 | rebloggable

A sweet moment of weakness helps Buck and Eddie get together. While Eddie doesn’t expect much to change about their relationship, Buck slips back into old patterns.

or: eddie notices all the ways buck tries to make himself smaller

don't blame me, love made me crazy (E, 1.6k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Steam was fogging up the room and Eddie cursed inwardly. Was Buck trying to cook himself? Eddie wasn’t one for steaming hot showers but Buck ran cold even on his best days and this wasn’t one of those. He must’ve been desperate to warm up and soothe the pain his bruises were causing him. Eddie was suddenly very aware he was intruding on his best friend's privacy, even if he did need help, and decided to announce himself. “Buck, it’s me, I-“ He stopped in his tracks when Buck came into vision and met his gaze. Worry turned to lust quickly. Buck was hard. Incredibly so.

or: eddie joins buck in the shower (plot? what plot)

I only ever want you (E, 2.7k) | ao3 | rebloggable

When a handsome guy flirts with Eddie, Buck can’t stand to watch. He leaves the 118’s bar outing in a hurry, only for Eddie to follow him to the loft and confront him. A misunderstanding of why Buck is so jealous leads to a confession – and more.

or: there’s jealousy, there’s fighting, there’s delicious makeup sex

love is stored in the picnic basket (T, 4.9k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Buck participates in the 118’s basket bidding on Valentine’s Day and things go exactly as (Bobby) planned. When Eddie is done standing on the sidelines, he makes the grand gesture Buck has been dreaming of.

or: buck’s heart (um, picnic basket) is up for auction and eddie is ready to pay

whose peace are you keeping? (G, 3.9k) | ao3

Buck tells Eddie about the Buckley-Han family dinner and how odd it felt hearing his mother call him a “miracle baby”. Why can’t he trust his parents’ support when that’s all he’s ever wanted? He doesn’t know that Eddie lost his temper with them when they visited the firehouse two years ago. Now it’s time to come clean. A call that feels all too familiar interferes but a good night’s sleep brings them back on track.

or: it’s actually incredibly easy to love evan buckley – and eddie told his parents as much

my heart is trying to crawl out of my chest to get to you (G, 2.1k) | ao3

Buck is released from the hospital and while the rest of his family is understandably on edge about his recovery, Eddie throws himself back into work. He refuses to be a part of Maddie’s “operation buck up buttercup” and Hen grows suspicious. Listen, it’s not like Eddie isn’t worried, quite the opposite actually. He just found a better way to watch over Buck, without having to spill any of his secrets. Unless technology plays a trick on him, as it usually does, and his foolproof plan goes wrong. But Buck might just surprise him.

or: the one where eddie takes buck's recovery a little too seriously

and my attempt at rpf if you're into it:

closer than ever – ryliver (E, 2.k)

if you made it to the end of this post, thank you so much for reading!

[glisten-inthedark]

Why do you think, from a psychological perspective, Mike says in his big I love you speech to Eleven that he’s loved her ever since he found her in the woods? Like, why choose that memory to say, “and I knew in that moment that I loved you”?

I think, from a writing perspective, the writers did this in order to present the audience with a provable lie. One that, the more you dwell on it, the less validity it holds. If he had chosen basically any other moment he’s had with El, the audience could go “oh, well, that’s when his crush on her started/when he realized he liked her, and now he’s just retroactively calling it love.” Like, say, the quarry scene—that scene makes way more sense to me for a young kid to realize he has a crush, especially since afterward, they have that awkward almost-kiss in the basement bathroom which makes it seem like, if Mike is bi and did have a crush on El at some point, this is the point where he became aware of it.

But the moment they met? He can’t have loved her. He didn’t know her name, where she came from, her age, if she could even speak, he didn’t even know if she was a girl or a boy. He could have had the random thought of “they’re cute,” but the likelihood of that thought being any sort of priority when they just found a frightened barefoot child in a thunderstorm wearing nothing but a giant tshirt of a local diner when they were trying to find Will is incredibly minuscule.

If I was one of the writers and I wanted to set up Mike’s speech knowing I intended to dismantle it in the very next season, I would have him say he fell in love with El at either a highly improbable moment or an impossible moment. I’d want the moment chosen to have inadequate emotional depth and feel lackluster especially in comparison to the actual endgame ship I’m setting up.

But I’m curious about your thoughts from a psychological/character perspective. Why would Mike choose that moment?

Hello!

This is actually a good question and I think there are a few possibilities as to why he'd choose that moment.

The first one being that he understands that it connect to El more given her penchant for watching romantic movies and so. Although there's nothing that points to them having these kind of conversations, it feels like a possibility we have to acknowledge.

So considering that he's desperate, he pulls from something he recognizes as familiar and uses it.

While there's some debate on the precedent of this idea - as most Freudian ideas are debated to this day - we could also make an argument about him subconsciously creating this scenario so that he'd get caught in a lie. Think of it as a Freudian slip, but within the actions of what he's doing.

Freud believed that sometimes, we subconsciously do and say things when we are feeling stressed/guilt in order to get caught. We don't know we are doing it, but we set ourselves up unconsciously in order to deal with the guilt or shame of what we're truly experiencing – so he goes to the one moment he knows has no actual fundamental bases to the truth without being aware of it.

There's also a possibility he could have been somewhat overcompensating for things he knows he doesn't currently feel, so he goes to the moment that'd make everything sound more romantic and life altering, even though he doesn't believe in love and first sight he wants to make it sound like their story was meant to be when he knows for a fact he doesn't love her like that.

These are just minor hypothesis though, I'd have to watch the show again to see if I could get more in depth about it lmao.

[mia-martian]

I wanna bring to the Death Note and Lawlight community a take that I have and rarely ever hear about.

A lot of people seem to look at or even just remember L as an unfeeling apathetic weirdo- and this is coming from people who haven't seen the anime in years or just see a couple scenes of him. And that's a fair enough assessment to make- dude is detached in his own way.

But it's really ironic when he's put next to Light Yagami, a character who I believe literally doesn't know how to love.

Not in the aro/ace way- dude doesn't even know how to love anyone platonically. He doesn't love his family, he doesn't love his friends or his romantic partners, he doesn't love anyone. If he shows any small signs of it, I am not inclined to believe it.

When his father died and he cried, it looked like the most half-assed performance to me. As if he used it to framework and test how he would act for L's death. (Edit: Apparently Soichiro's death was after L's i think? I remembered that incorrectly. But at the same time, I think he copy-pasted his fake reaction to L's death and reused it for his dad. Point is, I don't believe he even grieves sincerely.)

And I don't think the Death Note itself exclusively did this to him. Sure, it influenced him a LOT. When you find yourself in a place of power, your brain chemistry LITERALLY changes. Of course the ability to kill with almost no consequence would influence him.

But even in the Yostuba amnesia arc, even when he's doe-eyed and defending the innocent and fighting with L about the people who died for the Kira case, I am not convinced that it's the truth. I am not convinced that he isn't just saying what he was taught to say and believe by his father. I am not convinced he fully believes his own words, even subconsciously. At least in the context of the anime and manga, he is the most insincere character I have ever seen. It's nothing but bullshit coming out of his mouth.

I'd argue the Death Note only gave him a feeling of authority that caused the mask to slip off. I'd argue that he was always this lost and was just waiting for an excuse to cut to the chase on 'justice'. To build his guillotine and finally start collecting the heads he wants to put on his mantle. He is the unfeeling, apathetic and cold freak that I've seen people assume L is. All the Death Note did was foster it.

Because while L tries to be a character for the necessary evil and gray area (i.e. Lind L. Tailor), Light is just evil. He is blindly writing names and filling pages the moment he realizes that the notebook works. He is placing a bomb in his house without thinking of the risks he'd place on his kid sister or his well-meaning parents. He is manipulating women and using them like tools. I simply cannot imagine a reality in canon where Light Yagami can love.

And obviously my point isn't to say "Lawlight wouldn't work in canon !! You can't ship them !!" The canon of a story isn't some kind of divine set of rules, literally have all the fun you want. Canon isn't real. This story isn't real. Literally make it all up and turn Light Yagami into a pining, simping mess. If anything, that's justice.

But it's interesting to think about. I used to ship Lawlight so intensely. But then years later, when I rewatched the anime, my feelings changed drastically.

Now I can't fucking stand Light Yagami, and I wish the same fate he places on all his victims. As ironic as that is.

If he was a real human being, and I had the notebook in my hands, his name would be one of the first that I would write. Call that a sign of my bias.

Now I can't imagine a single scenario where Light loves L.

I mean, I think L definitely would have feelings for Light. L has shown that he has the capability to care, despite how the writers tact on things like in the How to Read manga where his line about Light being his first ever friend could've been a 'coldly thought-out strategy.' (Eye roll)

Even in the scenario that L doesn't truly consider Light a friend, he shows that he cares for people even a little bit. When a member of the task force decides to quit and leave, L says he appreciates him and makes sure he and his family are well paid and protected. When he witnesses a member die, he's shaking in fear. He is capable of being vulnerable and caring for others. He just doesn't do it often. It's half a choice to protect himself, and half his unmasked autism. (And bro IS autistic i don't gotta defend that point)

L is capable of loving Light if L allowed himself to. If that "you're my first friend" line is sincere, he's opened his heart up to a monster. And the unfortunate thing is that there is no possible way Light is reciprocating. Light is the unfeeling, lying monster, uncapable of even concieving what love feels like. Light doesn't care for other people. His motives might be driven by a sense of justice, but that is just the flavor. That's just the color that his true intentions are thinly painted over. The true intention of power. The only thing that brings him joy is the authority he believes he has over humanity.

[autumnmobile12]

Ambush Sim:  Touya and Hawks’ Relationship

I don’t want to call it complicated; how I write them is they’re both relatively straightforward with each other, but there is a distinct divide in how Hawks views Endeavor the hero vs how Touya views Enji his father.  That's not a part of their dynamic they can ignore, so this is the only way I can write this ship with any sense that it's a healthy one:

Hawks doesn’t know the full story and is also aware he can’t just pry it out of Touya, but he can tell with the father-son interactions that something is wrong and he has the understanding that whatever is causing Touya’s animosity is probably warranted. (He has heard the rumors other Pros share about Endeavor, has uneasily discounted them for lack of evidence and the fact none of the family members ever came forward, and has since come to the conclusion this stance may be naïvely optimistic.)  The same is true of Touya knowing Hawks has a reason to admire the hero but not knowing exactly what that reason is.  He has three main reasons for keeping silent about what his father did:

It is rooted in the years he’s already spent keeping silent in order to avoid the fallout should their family’s story go public.

It is also a matter of compassion.  He is not vindictive enough in this AU to completely ruin Hawks’ perception of his childhood hero, and this also a stance he took with his piano students.  True, there is the debate on whether or not it is honorable or even healthy to withhold that kind of information, especially when the likely response to finding that out is, ‘Wow, I wish you’d told me sooner.’  But this is the razor line everyone in this family walks in regards to their patriarch.

He's made this compromise with his sister; he figures he can do it with his partner.

So the result is Touya and Hawks have an unspoken and very temporary compromise of shelving the Endeavor issue.

They both know this is eventually going to be a discussion that can’t be avoided.

...

One thing I've noticed while writing, though, is their relationship very closely resembles these two:

And I'm pretty sure that's subconscious, but it's the personalities that match up for me.

Shinra is a more comedic character, but he's the character type you don't know to take seriously until they do something extreme and worth your undivided attention. Shinra will be joking and laughing with Celty in one scene, the next he'll be threatening a guy with a scalpel.

In the same manner, Hawks is similar. Trickster/goofball one moment, legitimately threatening the next.

Celty is also a bit of a silly character when you get down to it. In spite of being a serious and levelheaded fairy creature who's calling is to retrieve the souls of the dead and dying...she's clumsy, she misplaces things, she gets flustered, she's afraid of aliens to the point cheesy 80s sci-fi horror films scare her, and she's a terrible liar. What makes her comparable to Touya, however, is the theme of chasing something seemingly unattainable. Celty is a headless horsewoman whose head was stolen from her and she lost centuries of memories with it.

She could survive without her head, but she couldn't live without it.

And then there's Touya chasing after his father's recognition, surviving without it, and slowly learning to live without it in the Ambush Sim AU.

So in spite of the toxic elements of their relationship (and there are a few,) the way Shinra and Celty come together and balance out the bad with the good where it otherwise shouldn't happen...is adorable in all the wrong and right ways.

These two in the Ambush Sim AU are very slow-burn.

Hawks makes the slow-burn a writing requirement because of the demisexual headcanon I gave him. Putting it in the simplest terms, demisexuality is primarily needing an emotional connection first and foremost, and then there’s Touya who’s determined to keep everything emotional locked down due to past trauma. So the thought process is, 'That's a major incompatibility hurdle. Is that even gonna work?'

It's definitely one of the more challenging ship dynamics I've worked with, but after playing with the Trepha ship in the Castlevania fandom for the past couple years, I think I've got a good grasp of how to do it without it coming off as unnatural or toxic. In any case, it is an interesting ship to explore and I hope to do more with it in this AU because Touya and Hawks are very much black cat and golden retriever energy and I love that.

...

“So did you want me to cook or are you good with airport food?”

“Are you kidding me,”  Hawks laughed as he followed him.  “With how I was eating in America, I feel like I should fast for a week.  So many carbs.”

“I hear they have a good cultural variety.”

“Oh yeah, my first day there, I had barbeque pirozhki for lunch.  I don’t quite know what that is, but it was delicious.”

“I’ll find you a recipe then.”

“Really?”  He beamed at his turned back.  “You’re the best, you know that?”

“Yeah, yeah.”  Touya pulled out his phone.  “How do you spell that?

[anto-pops]

A Torrid Arrangement - Sebastian Sallow x Female! Reader

Summary: You and Sebastian have had a 'friends-with-benefits' dynamic going on for close to a year now, and the more time passes, the harder it is for him to hide his true feelings for you. It's an unbearable kind of torment, but he forces himself to grin and bear it anyway to preserve the integrity of his... situation-ship with you. That is, until the metaphorical floodgates finally open up.

Alternatively summarized as gratuitous FWB smut with lots of playful banter sprinkled in

This came from the depths of my fever-induced brain so if its all over the place, I apologize. But YAY MORE SMUT !!

Word Count: 8.6k

Warnings: 18+, aged up characters, explicit sexual content, lots of hickies

Full fic can be found here on Ao3 with more informative tags, as per usual :))

Sebastian knew it was going to be one of those days before he was even fully conscious. 

He jolted awake from an extremely graphic wet dream at the ass crack of dawn, hard and sweaty and tangled in the sheets, already reaching beside himself for the body that had just been pressed against his own. The dream had been so real– so incredibly vivid– that he swore he could still taste the familiar, salty skin on the tip of his tongue. He’d been so fucking close too; buried deep between soft thighs, clinging tight with every fiber of his being when reality had come and butt its ugly, unwelcome head in. 

With a ragged, disappointed groan, Sebastian let his head fall back against his pillow and dragged his hands down his flushed face, graciously allowing himself a few minutes to sort himself out. 

This was far from the first wet dream he’d had about you, and he was certain it wouldn’t be the last. Hell– you gave Sebastian’s thirsty subconscious plenty of material to work with every time you came around to ‘relieve stress’. Being long-standing fuck buddies with you granted him that lucious priviledge. Sebastian knew damn well how good you felt holding onto him, what you sounded like when you were about to come, what your heated, sweat-slick skin tasted like. 

He also knew how fucking cute you could be— especially when you were sprawled across his bed in his dorm with a textbook open beneath you to sneakily segue from studying together to fooling around. He knew how badly he wanted to spread you out across his sheets and make you moan for hours– to worship your perfect body slowly and sweetly with his hands and his mouth. 

It was barely past dawn and Sebastian already knew he was going to be tracking you down at some point today to act on his urges. As always, he would be hiding his monstrous crush under a thick layer of casual booty call. 

—

Whenever Sebastian woke up like this– nerves stretched paper thin over a desperate craving for intimacy– dueling was one of the few things that helped him clear his head and get his shit together. He wasn’t exactly a morning person, and he was even less of a people person at such a ripe, early hour, but he’d still left the confines of his dorm to make the trek to the Crossed Wands courtyard. 

There were no students in this area of the castle at this time, which just meant he would be making do with the practice dummies for a few hours until his blood cooled within his veins. Spell after spell fired from his wand and struck hard and true against the wooden figurines that lined the walls, the sound echoing off the Clock Tower walls and drowning out his incessant, horny thoughts. 

Thoughts that revolved too much around how nice your thighs would look with dark imprints of his teeth all over them. 

Biting the inside of his cheek, Sebastian unleashed a particularly aggressive Confringo charm in a bid to expel his sinful train of thought. The dummy erupted in an explosion of wooden bits and flaming embers, and as it collapsed to the stone floor in a mangled heap, the brunet realized that there was in fact one other person on school grounds awake– and they just so happened to be walking right towards him. 

He could practically hear fate howling with laughter at his expense when he dimly registered that not only did he know this lone survivor, it was against all probability none other than you, because why the fuck not. 

You were stomping through the outer courtyard with a few textbooks clutched tight in your white-knuckled grip, looking equal parts distracted and deliciously disheveled from a distance. Your mind had to be as scattered as his was, because you clearly didn’t notice Sebastian or the on fire training dummy as you strode through the open clock tower gate. He did his best to play it cool when you finally made eye contact with him, trying exceptionally hard to not look like he’d just jacked off to the way dream-you squirmed under him not twenty minutes prior. 

“Hey, you,” Sebastian called out smoothly when your hurried pace slowed down at the sight of him. You shook your head as though to clear it, squinting at him harder as you evenly stalked up to him, and your frown became more and more apparent the closer you got. Everything about your demeanor screamed ‘wild Graphorn, do not approach’, but Sebastian had never been great at following directions. 

You raked one of your hands through your wild hair as you finally came to stop a few feet away, panting slightly as you stared up at him as though you weren’t entirely sure he was real. “Sebastian?” 

The man in question cocked a brow at you, giving you a quick once over. Your hair was definitely mussed more than usual, a few stray strands falling over your forehead while others stuck up on one side– as if you’d been combing your fingers through it all night. There was no missing the mildly insane glint in your bloodshot eyes, and you were slightly paler than normal. Sebastian was also pretty sure you’d been wearing the same blouse yesterday, if the tiny stain on the collar was any indication. 

If you didn’t look so damned grumpy, Sebastian would swear he’d just caught you in the middle of a walk of shame. The mere idea sent a sharp pang of jealousy straight through his core, and he had to bite his tongue to stifle the snide comment that threatened to fall from his lips. He failed, opting to instead poke the metaphorical bruise and deal with the throbbing ache doing so would bring him. 

“Someone didn’t go to her dorm last night,” he snickered, aiming a crooked grin down at you. “Congrats on getting lucky.” 

Normally he would expect you to just roll your eyes and punch him in the shoulder before ribbing him back. But as Sebastian watched your eyes widen at the same time your face flushed several different shades of red, he couldn’t help but wonder if poking the metaphorical Graphorn before the sun was even fully up was a good idea. 

“I was not getting lucky,” you hissed at him, one eye twitching. Sebastian raised his hands in mock surrender before sticking his wand back in his pocket, awkwardly shifting on his feet for a moment as you huffed out an agitated sigh. “I’ve been getting fucked for the last twelve hours by Professor Sharp’s assignment– fifteen pages on the origin and uses of Wiggenweld. I’m not even sure if most of what I’ve written comes off as real English, so don’t fucking chuckle at me about getting lucky, you ass.” 

Sebastian just stared at you silently, watching you fume. He’d pulled plenty of all-nighters with you before, so he knew full well that after a certain amount of sleep deprivation and stress, you had a tendency to lose your shit in addition to your filter. “Ah,” he mumbled as he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, only hesitating for a second. 

After all, he just so happened to know exactly how you liked to relieve your stress. 

He licked his lips quickly before he said, “You, uh… kinda look like you could stand to get lucky, huh?” 

Your nostrils flared slightly as you squinted up at him for a long minute instead of responding. It might have looked like a murderous face to anyone else, but Sebastian knew better, and he could practically hear the gears in your head clanking together as you weighed the offer. 

“…I mean, if you’re not doing anything else,” you finally muttered, your tense shoulders dropping a smidge. 

He gestured loosely to the demolished pile of wood on the ground. “I’m not anymore,” came his fluid reply, and before you could take note of the smoking remnants of the training dummy, Sebastian’s hand was grasping yours tight as he tugged you along behind him. You blearily blinked the fatigue from your eyes as you fell into step beside him, and the brunet tried his very best not to let on how extremely pleased he was.

—

Halfway to Sebastian’s dorm, you’d interrupted his hurried pace and directed him to the Room of Requirement in an attempt to avoid any awkward run-ins with his roommates. The absolute last thing you wanted to deal with on top of your Potion’s related irritation was prying eyes, and you already knew the Slytherin dorms would be chock full of those. 

Upon entering the more private space atop the Astronomy Tower, you threw aside your textbooks on the lone side table next to the double doors and spun around to yank Sebastian into a frantic, needy kiss. Your nails dug into his firm shoulders as you swiftly pulled him down to your level, and he allowed you to grind your hips against his steadily growing erection as his own fingers dug into the small of your back. 

“H-Hey, hold on,” Sebastian wheezed out when you pulled away to tug at his belt, and his hands dropped to your waist to hold you at arms length so he could look you over again. As the two of you had trekked up to the Room, you’d begun to look more and more exhausted— too out of it to even gripe about the endless staircase that never failed to draw complaints from you. “Are you sure you’re up for this right now? You look like death.” 

You snorted and rolled your tired eyes, pursing your lips in blatant disapproval. “Nagging, Sebastian? Really? I thought we were past this.” 

“I’m not nagging,” he grumbled. “I’m just saying, you kinda look like you need a nap more than you need a quick fuck.” 

Tutting disdainfully, your hands fell away from his belt as you crossed your arms over your chest. “I was just starting to loosen up. See if I ever relax around your ass again,” you retorted drily, tilting your head back to blink up at the ceiling. “The assignment is due before lunch today. If I sleep now, I’m not waking up until tomorrow. I can’t sleep yet.”

Sebastian tilted his head with a thoughtful frown, mirroring your stance by crossing his arms over his own chest. “What if I wake you up?” 

You shook your head dutifully, although you were sorely tempted by the idea. “Trust me, I can feel the impending coma. I can’t risk it.”

“Want me to turn your paper in for you?”

Another mournful shake of your head. “You know Sharp, he’s as stern as they come. I’m positive he wouldn’t take it from you– and I’m sure he’d give you detention for trying. It’s fine, I just need to tough it out for a few more hours. Think you can help with that?” 

“Shit, yeah,” he relented, fighting the urge to bury his face in your messy head of hair. Instead he opted for uncrossing his arms to run his hands up your shoulders to gently squeeze at the tense muscles there, and you sighed at the delightful shiver that danced up your spine from the action. “I’m really not trying to kill you, though. Are you sure you’re good for this?” 

You snorted again, shaking your head slightly, and the tension in your upper body began seeping away under Sebastian’s warm palms. “Are you always this sweet to your fuck buddies?” The brunet could feel himself flushing at the statement, but before he could respond, you were muttering, “It’s really weird coming from you.” 

“Hey–”

“Just shut up and fuck me already,” you barked over Sebastian’s protest, pulling away from him to head further into the massive space towards the modest bedroom in the corner. The adjacent room had never disappeared after your first hook-up here with your longtime companion, and its constant existence since then had served as an odd reminder of your arrangement with the man. 

If you weren’t so stiff and weird from exhaustion, Sebastian could honestly convince himself that you were embarrassed or something. For now, though, he simply chalked your jaded nature up to your lack of a filter and stalked after you– totally not obsessing over the fact that you’d just called him sweet. 

You’d been undoing the buttons on your shirt as you walked, and as soon as you made it inside the bedroom, you stripped the material off completely and discarded it in the corner of the room. Your skirt quickly followed, and all the while Sebastian was forcing himself not to think about how nice dream-you’s skin had looked tangled in his dream-sheets. 

Sebastian stood in the doorway as he began unbuttoning his own shirt, shucking the attire off of his shoulders before moving down to his belt. The metal clink of the buckle was enough to draw your attention, and you fell back onto the mattress and scooted up towards the pillows without taking your eyes off him. The eager look in your fatigued eyes was enough to spur Sebastian onward quicker, and before long he was dressed in only his briefs as he prowled towards the bed with a predatory glint in his eyes. 

The way you were sprawled atop the sheets with your arms resting above your head was a sight Sebastian vowed to commit to memory for as long as he lived. You were clearly giving him free reign over your body, and his mouth ran dry at the realization that you were wholly handing control over to him. He swallowed thickly and moved to straddle your hips, leaning over you on his forearms so he could better slot your lips together, and after a few tentative pecks, his boldness started to grow. You sighed and tilted your chin into Sebastian’s kisses, parting your lips invitingly as you melted into the cool, satin sheets beneath you. 

With as tired and as boneless as you were, it seemed like you might actually be patient for once, and the thought had Sebastian’s heart fluttering excitedly. More often than not, he was so susceptible to your impatience and intensity that he always found himself getting swept up in your urgency when the two of you did this. Not that he didn’t love it; the dire, rough pace he’d always settle into with you, all gasping moans and tightly-gripped hands and frantic, needy thrusts– he absolutely loved it. It kept him hooked and craving more, even when you were both panting and sated. This, though…

Having you give up the lead and just relax for him was like a literal wet dream come to life. 

Tangling your tongues with a low moan, Sebastian leaned into you slightly, his hands shifting to rub slowly up your sides until his deft fingers slipped under your arched back to unhook your bra. It fell away like nothing, and you moaned against his lips when the pads of his thumbs came to graze over your pert nipples. Your sleep-deprived loopiness had to be contagious, because Sebastian pulled away from your lips to mouth hotly against your ear, “I dreamt about you last night.” 

He didn’t get the chance to feel weird about admitting it. You chuckled warmly, your kiss-swollen lips curving into a crooked, amused smile. “Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah,” he murmured, pausing to suck gently at your earlobe while his thumbs idly traced the outline of your ribs. He brushed his lips down the angle of your jaw, exhaling shakily when you leaned your head aside to freely offer him the wonderfully sensitive expanse of your neck. Sebastian lightly dragged his teeth down the soft, heated skin, then flicked his tongue over the faded imprint of the last hickey he’d left there. It was barely noticeable now. 

You shivered at the feeling, your fingers twisting in the sheets above your head before you sighed contentedly. “Was I pulling my hair out about Potions?”

“Fuck no.” He nipped at the faint bruise before pressing a hot, open-mouthed kiss to your pulse, sucking just enough to briefly tease you. “I had you under me like this,” he continued softly, pitching his voice low and nuzzling into your ear again, purposely aiming to press your buttons and work you into a needy frenzy. He felt your breath hitch more than he heard it, and as a sly grin broke out across his face, Sebastian slipped his fingers up your chest to pinch at your nipples once again. “I was fucking you nice and slow, making you feel so good…”

Moaning softly, you arched up into Sebastian’s hands, worrying your bottom lip between your teeth as he teased and flicked the sensitive nubs into stiff peaks. Your hips inadvertently rocked up against his as you desperately sought friction in the area you wanted it most. “Sounds like you’ve already got a game plan, huh?”

He sat back on his heels to look down at you as he shrugged. “If you’re up to it,”

“Just don’t let me fall asleep,” you mused, your hooded eyes trailing down Sebastian’s tanned, freckled chest to his dark briefs, halting when you caught sight of his cock straining against the cotton material. The sight had you licking your lips and fidgeting slightly before you blinked back up at him. “This paper is worth a quarter of my grade.” 

“I won’t. Merlin– you worry too much.” Sitting upright with an amused shake of his head, Sebastian rolled off of you to sidle down the mattress so he was kneeled comfortably between your outstretched legs. Your hands fell to your thin underwear, ready to peel them away to get a move on with things, but Sebastian swatted away your appendages quickly. With a half-hearted scowl, you relinquished control, allowing your arms to rest above your head again as you once more bared yourself to the larger man. 

Sebastian groaned softly at the sight, continuing where you’d left off by slipping his fingers under the waistband of your undergarments before tugging the damp fabric away from your aching center. You lifted your knees to assist him, and in one swift motion he had discarded the soiled attire over his shoulder, taking care to drag his eyes down the supple curve of your waist before settling on your glistening folds. 

“Damn, darling,” he moaned earnestly. “You look so fucking perfect like this.” You huffed softly as you hooked your legs around Sebastian’s hips to tug him closer, and he hummed at the same time he looped one of his hands under your thigh to hold you to him as he rocked against your slick core. The friction was tantamount to perfection, but you craved more, and Sebastian knew it too. 

Before you could open your mouth to complain, the freckled man ducked to press hot, wet kisses down the line of your throat, sucking and biting as he made his way down your shoulder past your collarbone. As he mouthed down your chest, he paused to tease one of your perked nipples gently between his teeth, and a pang of arousal shot through him when you arched and moaned under him. It was pure bliss– and your eyes rolled shut as your hips pressed up insistently. Sebastian ground his hips into yours for as long as he could manage before he had to scoot back to continue further, but he made up for it by dragging his nails deliciously down your thighs before he’d settled between your outstretched legs. 

You made such a pretty picture spread out in the lush, satin sheets this way; with your hands fisted in the covers above your head, your legs spread on either side of him, and the lustful gaze you pinned him with, Sebastian was half convinced he’d fallen back asleep this morning and was still dreaming. He couldn’t pass up the opportunity to watch your body react to his touch, so he smiled as he dipped his head to drag the flat of his tongue up your wet folds, and the way your breath stuttered in your throat was far more enticing than it had any right to be. You attempted to push yourself up onto your elbows to watch– entirely enthralled with how Sebastian looked between your thighs– but then he took your clit between his lips and sucked, and you were pulling the sheets into your clenched fists and falling back against the pillows with a ragged moan.

Sebastian continued to toy with you that way for far too long for comfort– holding you hostage in some combined purgatory of bliss and torment as he sucked and lapped at your center. It was far too easy to reduce you to a pile of brainless mush given your fatigued, overly-sensitive state, and he was all too curious to discover how many new things you would let him get away with before you got impatient and started begging. 

With gentle, attentive hands, Sebastian coaxed you into raising one of your knees up so he could throw your leg over his shoulder, instantly coiling his strong arms under your waist to hold you firmly to his unrelenting mouth. His stomach flipped at how easily you relaxed for him, and you proceeded to fight your boneless nature so you could sit up and watch him with lust-dark, hazy eyes. Sebastian loved the attention– thrived on it, really– and he broke away from your overwhelmingly wet heat to pepper chaste kisses along the smooth hollow of your leg. You were already breathing heavier– your fingers twitching around handfuls of fabric– and when Sebastian moaned and slipped his tongue out in-between kisses to lightly run the tip along soft, sensitive skin, your breath caught audibly in your chest before you shuddered out a shaky sigh. 

When he first sank his teeth into the heated flesh midway up your inner thigh, he did so gently, but your hips still jerked at the sensation, and you couldn’t stop the wanton moan that slipped through your parted lips. “Fuck, Sebastian–��� you groaned, your voice laced with obvious desire. You dug the heel of your foot into the middle of his back, silently imploring him to give you more, because the feeling of him marking you somewhere so sensitive was too fucking good. 

Sebastian flashed you a smug grin as he pulled away, but not before planting a lingering kiss along the faint imprints of his teeth. The gesture was warm and promising– as was the way his hand squeezed your waist before letting the leg over his shoulder fall back against the mattress. He moved to splay his hands over your hips, your thighs resting comfortably over his arms, but he let them stay spread open rather than using his grip to pull you around like he usually would. 

As his thumbs trailed gently along the curves of your hip bones, Sebastian leaned back down to brush another warm kiss along your inner thigh, humming at the way your muscles tensed slightly. He nuzzled up higher, then parted his lips against the soft skin to bite again, and this time he sucked steadily with the intent of leaving a dark, lasting mark there too. You moaned softly, your hips rocking up at the sensation, and as Sebastian worked yet another brand into your skin, your breath shifted into quiet panting as your hands twisted in the sheets. 

Satisfied with the deep purple of the bruise and the light imprint of his teeth around it, Sebastian pulled away and dragged the flat of his tongue over his brand soothingly, breathing a low groan as he did so. He admired it for a moment longer before he mouthed wetly up your leg further, his dark, messy curls brushing against the join of your thigh. 

He nuzzled closer to begin working another mark there, and the sharp sting of his lips and his teeth had you gasping– bending your free thigh up to let it fall to the side in a bid to give Sebastian all the room he wanted to keep going. He moaned encouragingly, squeezing your hips once again as you lifted them up for more, and he dragged his tongue up along the soft hollow of your thigh as his brow furrowed in concentration. 

“S-Sebastian,” you gasped, trembling under the brunet’s affection. The shaky insistence to your voice caught his attention, so he leaned up enough to look at you as he licked his lips and pet your hips soothingly. Swallowing heavily, you opened your eyes and shivered, meeting his gaze almost shyly before you murmured, “I-I don’t– I don’t usually like slow stuff.” 

Sebastian shifted up onto his elbows, idly drawing his palms back and forth over your flushed skin. His expression showed nothing but concern as he asked, “Do you want to stop?” 

You shook your head quickly, scooting your hips minutely towards him. “N-No, no– this is fine. Good, even, I… I like this.” 

Tilting his head to the side, Sebastian tried unsuccessfully to figure out what was happening, then cautiously asked, “Are you okay?” 

“Yes,” you answered firmly, leaving no room for doubt. You fidgeted for a few seconds, squirming under the obvious care Sebastian was showing for you until you eventually took a breath and relented. “I like this. A lot.” The freckled man only cocked a brow at you in confusion, but before he could move to crawl over you again, you huffed and flopped back against the mattress. “I like you leaving marks on me, too.” 

He mulled that over in his brain for a long moment, squinting slightly. “Okay…?” 

“You fucking ass,” you wheezed out, your breath akin to an overwhelmed laugh. “It’s because it’s you, Sebastian, Merlin’s beard– I like you.”

Pressing his lips into a thin line, Sebastian stared up at you again and carefully replied, “Thanks?” 

“Nevermind, I hate you,” you grumbled, slinging an arm over your face. “Forget I said anything.” 

“No– hold on–” he sputtered before sitting up straight, his arms sliding out from under your thighs. You appeared to be disgruntled by the change, but you didn’t come out from hiding to complain. “I mean– we’ve been fucking for like a year. I’d hope to the Gods you can stand me by now.” 

You groaned from beneath the safety of your arm shield, “I cannot believe I have to spell this out for you. I’ve been fucking you for like a year because I like you, you moonmind. Like, romantically. Very much into you, whether we’re fucking or not.”

With an uncomfortably loud click, Sebastian understood.

“Oh!” His eyes damn near popped out of his skull, his heart doing some insane acrobatics in his chest, but all of that took a backseat to the blissful realization that he wasn’t the only one with a big, gross crush. “Oh, shit, okay,” he sputtered, raking his hands through his hair. “Wow, okay. Fuck, sorry– I was totally involved in the hickey thing, my brain wasn’t on. Wow.” 

“Merlin’s balls,” you groused, already trying to roll away from Sebastian’s wildly embarrassing presence. “I should not have said anything.”

“No!” Sebastian scrambled up the bed to brace himself on his hands above you, caging you between his arms while his heart hammered away against his sternum. “No, no no, you definitely should have said something, darling– shit.” He paused to try and coax you into coming out of hiding, but when you resisted him firmly, he didn’t push it. Instead, he chewed the inside of his cheek and tried to get his racing thoughts in order so he wouldn’t blurt out something completely idiotic. 

“I am like, ridiculously in love with you.” 

Completely idiotic. 

You froze under him momentarily before peering up at him over your elbow, your wide-eyed stare bordering on horrified. Cursing under his breath, Sebastian buried his hands in his hair and stared right back, almost entirely sure he could feel his life force draining from his body. 

“I-I mean– fuck, wait–”

“Are you kidding me!?” You bolted upright– narrowly avoiding cracking your skull against Sebastian’s on the way up. Your fingers clamped down on his shoulders so you could rattle him slightly as you blurted, “What the hell, Sebastian! How long?” 

“I don’t know!” He threw his hands up and pointedly stared at the wall before grumbling, “I don’t fucking know, it’s not like it happened all at once. It started towards the end of our fifth-year and it just kinda… grew from there. Like a Horklump.” 

Sebastian realized how shitty that euphemism was when your mouth fell open in utter disbelief. “Did you seriously just compare your feelings for me to a fungus?” 

“Look, I’m sorry, okay?” He sat back on his heels, crossing his arms stiffly over his bare chest as he returned to staring at anything but you.

“For what, exactly?” You ran a trembling hand through your unruly hair, then dropped your gaze to the sheets. “For returning my feelings? Or for not saying anything before right now?” Sebastian just shrugged unhelpfully with his lips pursed. Groaning loudly, you flopped back onto the bed and stared at the ceiling for a minute, your irritated, murder face back in full swing. 

Just as Sebastian was starting to get worried by the awkward silence— doing his best not to fidget— you nodded to yourself and announced, “We should date each other.” 

“…Come again?” 

“We should date each other,” you repeated firmly, leaning up on your elbows again and exuding a confidence that had seemingly come out of nowhere. “I like you, you love me–” Sebastian did his best to not choke on his own tongue, “–we spend so much time together that we’re basically dating anyways. At least, Imelda seems to think so… it seems like a good enough idea to me, if you’re interested.” 

It took Sebastian a few seconds to untangle his tongue enough to reply, but when he did, all he could do was croak, “You want to date me?”

“Yes. I’d like that.” 

“…Are you high? Did you smoke Mallowsweet on your way here?”

You groaned and tipped your head back between your shoulders, very clearly searching for some semblance of patience. “I’m high on sleep deprivation, yes, but that doesn’t make my feelings any less real. They’re there whether I’ve slept or not. It’s actually hell.” 

Sebastian was still flabbergasted, staring down at you helplessly. “Why are you bringing this up now?” 

“I don’t know! I didn’t mean to full-on confess or anything, it just kind of came out that way. You were leaving hickeys on me, and I realized that whenever I wake up tomorrow, I’m gonna feel them and see them and remember how you fucking appeared out of nowhere right when I was wondering if you’d be pissed if I snuck into your dorm at the ass crack of dawn– and then I’ll remember how good you looked leaving them on me and how I totally wanted you to do slow mushy lovey sex stuff to me, and then I’ll probably sleep like shit for weeks fantasizing about that, and–”

“Okay, alright, damn,” Sebastian interjected, his face flushed an impressively dark shade of red.

“You asked,” you mumbled as you half-heartedly picked at the sheets. 

“I did, yeah.” Licking his lips quickly, Sebastian reached forward to rest his hand over yours, dragging his thumb along your knuckles soothingly. “I’d really, really like that. A lot, if I’m being honest. I’ve kind of dreamt about it for a while now.”

Your sheepish smile transformed rapidly into something purely elated, and you flipped your hand over to intertwine your fingers with his own as you playfully mused, “Not the only thing you’ve been dreaming about, apparently.” 

Sebastian laughed again, and this time it was less nervous and more breathless with relief. He leaned forward to brush his lips against yours, resting his free hand on your warm cheek, and you instantly relaxed for him as you tilted your chin up into the kiss as you gave his fingers a tentative squeeze. 

You fell back onto the bed again as you tugged Sebastian over you, loosely hooking your legs around his hips to keep him close. The brunet groaned and leaned into you, and when you threaded your fingers into his hair and pulled him into another kiss, he slipped his tongue between your lips with a shaky sigh– all too eager to put his hands all over you. Luckily you seemed to be of like mind, moaning against his mouth before pulling back just enough to whisper, “Touch me, please.” 

Sebastian nodded ardently and nipped at your flushed lips, shifting his weight to free up his hands so he could better run his palms along your sides. He squeezed gently before dragging one hand down to your still-slick heat, expertly seeking out your tiny bundle of nerves in a bid to reduce you to a mewling, gasping mess. Your spine rounded towards him as soon as he found it– an airy moan ripping from your throat as he pressed tight circles around the nub– and Sebastian swallowed your keening noises greedily. 

“Why are you still wearing these?” You murmured against his plush lips as your finger slipped beneath the waistband of his briefs, tugging softly to convey your request. 

There was no muffling his smug bark of laughter, and a feline smile split his face as he pulled back just enough to plant a featherlight kiss on the tip of your nose. “So impatient,” he teased, intentionally ignoring your hand on his undergarments in favor of sliding one of his skilled fingers through your folds. He replaced the missing finger against your clit with his thumb at the same time he inserted a digit inside of your pulsing walls, and the feeling had your head falling back as your lips parted around a stuttered gasp, your thighs tightening impossibly further around his waist. 

Undeterred, you blindly wiggled your hand under the hem of Sebastian’s underwear and tugged his arousal out with a practiced flick of your wrist. You wrapped your fingers around his girth and gave him a long, tight stroke– squeezing the head in the way you knew he liked– which in turn earned you a rough, wavering moan. Matching Sebastian’s pace was easy, and you stroked him steadily as you leaned up to seal your lips over his pulse to begin working a dark hickey of your own into his sweaty, freckled skin. 

Resting his weight on his free arm, Sebastian leaned closer as he sighed heavily while his brown eyes fluttered shut from the way your mouth felt on his neck. He rocked his hips into your hand and pumped his fingers a few more times inside of you before he was withdrawing the digits to push his briefs down all the way. You merely chuckled against his throat, pulling off of the fresh, blossoming mark with a satisfied hum before you laved your tongue over it. 

Once Sebastian had finally wrestled off his briefs and settled over you again, you tugged him by the neck back into a hungry kiss, and he groaned deeply at the way you moved perfectly against him. As you curled your tongue between his lips, your hands traversed down the broad expanse of his toned back to feel as much of him as you could, pawing encouragingly at his lower back to guide him into a languid, grinding rhythm against you. 

Sebastian let himself follow your lead for a few slow thrusts, but the way your skin felt against his– coupled with the way your quiet moans sounded muffled against his lips– was too tempting to overlook for long. Following a brief, bitey kiss, Sebastian dropped his hand between your legs once again to press at your wet, warm entrance. You shivered at the way his fingers felt against you as he coaxed you into relaxing, and your nails dug into his sculpted shoulders when he mercifully worked two of his thick digits inside of you. A string of moans and praises alike fell from your lips as your head lolled back against the pillows, and the remnants of Sebastian’s restraint began to slip away as a result. 

“Fuck, darling,” he keened breathlessly, unable to take his eyes off of your face as your expression shifted into one of pure pleasure. His buried his fingers to the knuckles, utterly overwhelmed at how tight you were, and he nudged his nose against your cheek as he murmured, “You look so fucking good right now…”

“Y-You may have mentioned that, yeah,” you laughed against his sweat-slick skin, blinking affectionately up at your now-boyfriend as he took in your pliant body beneath him, and the thought imbued you with a fresh sense of desire that you were desperate to act on. “Come on, I want you inside me already.” 

With a wheezy laugh, Sebastian nodded and ducked his head to catch your lips again as he started thrusting his fingers into your pulsing heat. He nibbled gently at your bottom lip when he buried his fingers deep to curl them towards your stomach, which in turn earned him a squeaky little moan that was immediately followed by an impatient wriggle of your hips. Your legs were trembling with barely contained want as you spread them further, and Sebastian took full advantage of the newly acquired space to readjust himself into a more comfortable position. 

By the time you were panting against him and rocking back onto his fingers, Sebastian was more than ready to move things along. He slid his fingers out and pulled away with another quick kiss before sitting up to steady his cock at your entrance. You helpfully wrapped your legs around his waist again, angling your hips towards him with a coy smile on your face until you felt the head of his achingly hard member bump against you. Sebastian flashed you a doting smile in return, and with an unhurried roll of his hips, he was sinking into you with a throaty groan that made your hair stand on end. 

“F-Fuck, you feel so warm– you’re perfect, darling,” he grit through his clenched teeth, plunging himself deeper inch by inch until he had bottomed out completely inside of you. The way your walls fluttered around him made him dizzy with need, but he noted the tension in your shoulders and forced himself to maintain his slow pace so you could get acclimated to the feeling. Sebastian was practically fluent in your stubborn body language by now, and he was nothing if not determined to get you to relax completely. 

Rather than thrusting deeper, Sebastian sighed and licked his lips as he glanced up at your face. You were an incredibly tense person on the best of days, but when you were running on fumes like this, he found it to be even harder to get you to release the mountain of stress you seemingly carried with you at all times. While he was all too used to the frown lines that so frequently cropped up between your brows, seeing them now just made Sebastian want to be even gentler with you– even more careful. 

He lightly nudged your head aside and set to dragging hot, wet kisses down the column of your throat, moaning wantonly at the bare salt of your sweat on his tongue. You shivered and gasped, tilting your head to the side with a low sigh to grant the brunet more access, and before long the combined feeling of Sebastian’s tongue and lips on your neck had you melting under him completely with your eyes blissfully closed. 

“That feels… really good,” you murmured with a low voice. It was pure rapture to feel Sebastian this way; moving slowly inside of you, his lips dancing down your throat and nipping softly at the skin there. His hands eventually crept up the pillows to tangle in your hair, and the enticing feeling of his nails scraping against your scalp was enough to have you tightening around his cock a fraction. 

The praise sent a bolt of confidence through Sebastian, and he moved from your neck back to your lips to slot your mouths together again. He gingerly pulled his hips back before rolling them forward, and when you moved down against him with a shaky breath, it was all the go-ahead he needed to keep going. 

The rhythm he fell into was slow and steady, moving inside you with long, easy thrusts while he ground against your ass every time he buried himself deep. His eyes remained trained on your face, your expression clearly showing how pleased you were to be taken care of. You weren’t squirming in blatant pleasure yet, but Sebastian figured this was a good enough first step. 

“C’mon, Sebastian– you’re putting me to sleep here,” you mumbled playfully, letting your arms rest above your head in the way Sebastian loved to see. His tempo faltered slightly, but your mischievous grin betrayed the legitimacy of the claim; he should’ve known you were simply teasing him, especially when he knew you always got a kick out of taunting him. 

“Oh yeah?” He practically purred, sitting back on his heels to wrap his hands around your hips as he hauled you aggressively into his lap. 

You adjusted to him easily, wiggling your hips in Sebastian’s grasp in a bid to spur him onward. “Yeah… jeez, Sallow, you had one job. Tsk tsk.” 

“Well, shit.” He grinned wickedly down at you as he rolled his hips back, pulling almost all the way out and relishing in the way your face fell briefly. He hovered there for a long, torturous second before he snapped his hips back into you, using his grip to hold you down on his cock as he ground deeper and harder than before. You were left gasping at the feeling, your head falling back as your fingers twisted in the sheets, and before you could recover, Sebastian rasped, “Guess I should fuck you better then, huh?” 

Without giving you room to breathe, Sebastian kept up his agonizingly slow pace, easily pulling you back onto his cock with every firm thrust. He fucked into you evenly– his strong hands controlling the rhythm in the way he knew drove you crazy– and it earned him a cacophony of shaky moans that fell from your flushed, bitten lips. 

“Yeah,” you replied finally, your voice tight and shaky. “You have to keep me up all morning, remember?” 

It was a simple enough statement, but the way it rolled off of your tongue made it sound absolutely filthy. Your raspy voice was dripping with lust, your hot breath panting out between your parted lips, and that was more than enough to light a fire in Sebastian’s blood. 

Groaning roughly, Sebastian paused long enough to hook his arms under your knees to haul them easily over his shoulders. You gasped as the movement lifted you off of your hips– then again when he nipped sharply at the inside of your knee before sucking hard enough to leave another flushed bruise there. The sensation had you squirming in Sebastian’s lap to the best of your ability, moaning breathlessly as he ground into you with a low rumble. 

Once he was satisfied with his mark, the freckled man rubbed his hands slowly down your tense thighs, leaning over you on his hands again so you were effectively bent back and pressed against the sheets. Sebastian leaned more of his weight into you– sinking deeper– and just as you were opening your mouth to urge him on, he started moving again. 

He picked up his pace from before easily, but now, every slow, hard thrust stuffed you full of him, and it didn’t take him long to find the angle that had you gasping sweet little moans with every shaky breath. 

Writhing under him, you arched your back and gasped Sebastian’s name as your hands tightened in the covers above your head and pulled ardently. He was fucking you slowly– but at this angle everything felt so intense– enough so that any teasing pretense you’d previously had was quickly washed away beneath constant, steady waves of pleasure. Your toes curled in the air behind him as your thighs quivered and flexed against his chest, but beyond that, you were entirely at his mercy. 

An animalistic sound reverberated from deep within Sebastian’s chest, and his own fingers gripped the sheets on either side of your head. The view he had of you was fucking insane; between the incredible face you were making, the way every thrust sent electric little sparks all throughout the both of you, and the way your cunt tightened around his cock with every deep thrust– he couldn’t help but moan your name, brainless praises falling from his lips whenever he could string the words together. 

“S-Sebastian,” you gasped, shakily riding your hips up against the brunet’s to meet his every thrust with keening moans. “Sebastian, fuck– more, more, please–”

He made a soft, broken sound at that, then shrugged your knees off his shoulders to let them fall into the bends of his elbows instead. Surging forward, he captured your lips with his and slipped his tongue between them, and you took full advantage of the closer proximity by burying your fingers in his messy, brown curls and pulling him impossibly closer. 

With you bent nearly in half this way, your knees almost touched the sheets and in turn gave Sebastian the room to pull back farther and thrust deeper– managing to maintain his steady rhythm and simultaneously drag his cock hard all along your sweet spot. You were positively shaking under him, gasping pretty, noisy little sounds into your shared kiss as you wound your fingers restlessly through his hair and pulled just to have something to hold onto. Sebastian squeezed his eyes shut and pumped his hips harder, his self-control stretched thin by how perfect you were. 

How you looked, how you sounded, how you felt… he wanted more of you– more of the loud, pleading moans that tumbled from your kiss-swollen lips. 

“Gods, darling–” Sebastian leaned down and sank his teeth into the crook of your neck, pressing his body against yours as much as he could. You bucked up against him and cried out at the sharp, sweet sting of your lover’s teeth, your head writhing against the pillows frantically as your hands fisted in his hair so you could press his face encouragingly against your flushed throat. It pulled a brutal groan from Sebastian as he bit harder, sucking yet another dark bruise into your skin, and the sound you made in response was enough to send his mind spinning.

Your voice echoed off the walls of the bedroom, your loud moans and cries of his name falling freely from your lips as Sebastian marked you mercilessly. The ragged sounds coming out of him almost sounded like growls muffled against your throat, and the feeling of being so full had you arching your back clean off the mattress. Your nails raked viciously down his neck and shoulders before digging into his strong biceps, but the sting from the welting lines only served to rile him up further. 

When you threw your head to the side and began shaking, your voice cracking as you wailed for Sebastian in the way that told him you were close, he pulled his arm out from under your trembling thigh to plant his thumb firmly against your clit and began rubbing tight circles against the overly-sensitive bundle of nerves. As he brought you closer to your climax, gasping filthy praises between stuttered moans, Sebastian sped up his pace until he was pounding his cock into you, doing his best to keep you bent at that perfect angle as he did so. Your entire body seemingly snapped off the bed– arched tight and clinging hard to his larger frame as you clawed your nails down his arms– and your airy voice rose higher and transformed into a desperate, overwhelmed scream that cracked and made Sebastian’s brain go completely blank. 

You shook apart entirely in Sebastian’s arms, tight and blindingly hot around his cock, squirming beautifully under him as he fucked you through your orgasm. Your slick coated his shaft as he relentlessly pumped into you, until the thunderous rush of his own climax crashed down around him. Warm, thick ropes of his cum filled you as he emptied himself inside, and Sebastian swore nothing on this Earth could ever hold a candle to how marvelous the feeling was.

He was vaguely aware of himself moaning your name over and over again– stammering out mumbled praises of good, so good darling, fuck. His hands gripped your hips tight as he curled over you and clung to you for dear life while he mouthed brainlessly against your heated skin. It took both of you a few long minutes to come down from your peaks; you with your arm slung over your eyes, and Sebastian slowly wrapping himself tighter and tighter around you to gather you closer. Even once the trembling had subsided, he couldn’t find a good enough reason to move. He twitched his hips back to pull out– mostly for your sake– but that was about all he could manage. 

“Holy shit,” you rasped out after a while, catching Sebastian’s bleary attention. He blinked up at you and watched as you dropped your arm above your head to stare up at the ceiling, and he hungrily took in the steady rise and fall of your bare chest as you caught your breath. 

He snorted softly and dragged his palms along your still shaking thighs– still loosely draped around his waist. “You alright?” There was something to be said about how pleased he was by the low, smokey sound of his own voice, and evidently you were too, considering how it sent more shivers up your spine. You nodded though, tugging at his shoulder to silently urge him closer. 

Sebastian slithered up until he was close enough to catch your lips, allowing you to pull him into a lazy, sated kiss while your fingers combed through his tangled curls. All too graciously, he melted against you– for once not fighting the desire to affectionately trail his knuckles down the line of your jaw. After a few minutes of languid kissing and mindless touching, Sebastian rolled to the side and let you readjust so you were laying on your side with your back to his chest, giving him the chance to wind his arms around your waist and hold you against him. 

He knew he was meant to be keeping you awake leading up to Potions class, but a few minutes of rest wouldn’t hurt. Beyond a herd of Thestrals stampeding through the room, Sebastian sorely doubted that anything could drag him away from this moment with you. He’d waited long enough for it as it was. 

—

After turning your assignment in and sitting through a particularly dreadful lesson for an hour, you’d finally been free’d from the shackles of the education system for the weekend, and you’d quickly found yourself sprawled across Sebastian’s bed with the curtains drawn. You were currently dead asleep and likely to stay that way for a while, but the brunet didn’t mind in the slightest. He wasn’t particularly tired, but he was especially interested in lengthy cuddling with his girlfriend, so he had no problem with the current arrangement. 

With his fingers tangled idly in your sleep-mussed hair, Sebastian watched as the bright streaks of daylight moved across the ceiling while you used his chest as a pillow, far too content to be bothered by how damn long it took to get to this point. 

[oxittocin]

domesticity and distance (nico robin x reader)

nico robin masterlist

a homage to loving women far better than i am.

cw: semi-suggestive (mdni!), gn!reader, inspired by joshua ip's poem "space opera"

There is a certain domesticity to sleeping together. Curled up, limbs intertwined, her bare back pressed against your bare chest. The heat that arose from the contact reminded you of the warmth a hearth creates. With her back facing you, you couldn’t tell if she was awake, or if she had fallen asleep, tuckered out by the night’s activities. But, listening to her steady, rhythmic breathing, you think, ah, she has already fallen asleep.

Subconsciously, you leaned forward to brush your lips gently against her exposed shoulder. A careful kiss. Your fingers tracing the outline of her back delicately, afraid to rouse her from her slumber.

You recall a playful exchange, where she’d asked you one day what your favourite part of her body was. Not thinking too much about it, you cheekily tell her it’s her ass that you adore the most. She shoots you an amused look, with raised eyebrows and a light flush on her cheeks, but she doesn’t say anything more than that.

Her back, it seems, has become a sight you’ve grown familiar with.

In the daytime, you steal glances at her as she sits on the upper deck of the ship, facing the sea as she peruses through one of her many books. You gaze at her silhouette and wonder what kind of expression she makes when she reads a sentence she resonates with. Does a small smile grace her lips, or, perhaps she looks out at the sea to pause and think? All these questions remaining unanswered, as you pull your gaze away from her shadow.

In the quiet of the night, she bestows you the privilege of worshipping her body, you do what you can not to neglect any part of her. Still, your favourite place to love her remains her back. The canvas for your masterpiece, the evidence of your adoration - it comes in many forms - the kisses that continue to linger on her skin long after they were planted, the small scratches that can only suggest a fraction of the night’s activities, the nail marks that unfortunately disappear by the time dawn arrives.

The soft sighs and rustling from her side of the bed brought you back to the present moment, and you plant one last kiss on her back.

There is a certain domesticity to sleeping together. Still, even as you drape one arm over her waist and pull her closer, she still feels so far away. Like the distance between a mortal and a goddess, you thought. Even so, you don't want to let her go - call it human selfishness. Laying your forehead against her back, you promise yourself you’ll close the gap one day - become a partner worth standing alongside her.

Perhaps, then, you’ll finally tell her the truth.

“Forgive me, Robin, I’d have named your eyes instead but you were always one more step ahead.”

[theresattrpgforthat]

hi Mint! do you know of any ttrpgs where everyone plays as AIs specifically? or at the very least robots, as long as being a machine is the main focus of the system

love your work!

THEME: AI

Hello, thank you so much! I might have a few games kicking around ;). Some of these artificial intelligences come with robot bodies - others do not!

Decaying Orbit, by StoryBrewers Roleplaying.

On a distant space station, an AI awakes. Its fragmented memory reveals a secret.

Decaying Orbit by Sidney Icarus is a storytelling RPG about a failed space station falling into a faraway star. As you play, you’ll piece together the mysteries, joys and horrors that occurred on board. In the station’s last moments, you’ll decide on the final transmission that the AI sends for earth to remember.

This game consists of a few decks of cards inside a small box, and yet it packs so much into such a small package. Your play group collaboratively takes on the role of an AI for one of 4 spaceships, which you choose depending on the kind of story you want to tell. You then shuffle a certain number of generic cards and ship-specific cards into one pile, and take turns flipping a card up and answering the prompts supplied there. Your answers are meant to be bits and pieces: audio recordings, data logs, patchy video clips, etc.

At any time your fellow players can tap a card labelled [ACCESS MEMORY] to ask you for more details about a certain event - and if you cannot think of anything more, or if you think it is more interesting not to know, you can tap [CORRUPTED MEMORY] to indicate that no further data can be gained from this record. At the end of the game, the AI will have to send a report back to home base, diagnosing why the ship in fact failed and fell. This game can be chilling, tragic, horrific, and so much more. I heavily recommend checking it out!

Subconscious Routine, by poorstudents.

It is 27XX, the world is overgrown, in ruins, and inhabited by the scraps of civilization. You play as bots, one of the masses of technological marvels that humanity built and powered with the Dyson sphere, around the sun, so long ago. Centuries ago, when almost all of humanity disappeared, they left their machines behind for reasons only known to them. All the technology they abandoned, including these bots, continues to function and follow their programming

In the centuries since the Great Departure, nature has come back to reclaim the Earth and the sphere around the sun has begun to crack. The world once only metal and circuits, grew wilder and more mysterious. The flora and fauna slowly integrated with the decaying machinery as the sound of computers humming was eventually met with the sound of birds chirping.

The bots you play as are still acting out your programmed loops but something is changing. Something unknown pushing them to move beyond their obsolete programming in order to achieve free will; something humanity never thought was possible.

As a one-page game, Subconscious Routine fits a lot in just a few paragraphs. You customize your characters by writing specific functions for them, and as you play, you’ll attempt to complete certain protocols in order to break yourselves out of your loop. What I think is really neat about this game is the fact that when the entire party takes a rest (called a reboot) 1d6*10 years passes. Playing a story on the scale of decades places this little game on such a big time frame, and I love how this one rule shifted my entire perspective.

AI Have Feelings?, by rommelkot.

In AI HAVE FEELINGS? a bunch of robots (you!) get sentimental on the journey of a battery time. This is a roleplaying game guided by prompt cards and a twist with feeling: your reaction to the prompt is an emotional one decided by the outcome of the roll of a die. The goal is (what else?) to tell stories together.

Unearth a hidden robot rebellion, rescue the remains of humanity, hunt for a mystical MacGuffin or simply buy a fancy new pair of socks - always do it with feeling in AI HAVE FEELINGS?.

You are robots with only two emotions,: one positive and one negative. You will roll randomly to determine which emotion you will use to deal with certain scenarios, which will be determined via prompts and scripts. The link here is for a playtest, which means you can download it for free and see how you feel about it! (The designer would also love feedback if you do play this game.) If you want a cute, somewhat lightearted game, I definitely recommend AI HAVE FEELINGS?

Threads, by Meghan Cross.

You are an Human/AI pair. Your day to day is shaped by one another, your existences unmistakably intertwined. Today began like any other day, until you began to notice that something wasn’t right. It was barely noticeable at first, small interruptions to a well-oiled routine, and then little by little the interruptions became less insignificant, until they were impossible to ignore. 

Something is wrong with the AI.

Threads is a narrative two player game about the relationship between a Human and AI and the lengths they would go to in order to save the memories of the AI. Together, establish the bond between your Human and AI and replay the memories they have shared together in order to save the AIs memory.  

This is a game in which one of you plays a human, and one of you plays an AI. You have developed a bond that would be lost if you wipe the AI’s memory - and you don’t want to lose that bond. The only way to maintain that bond is risky - a memory link. If the human uploads their own memories to the AI’s memory, the AI’s memory might be saved. Create your bond, and ask yourself - how far are you willing to go to save you companion?

The Treacherous Turn, by The Treacherous Turn.

The Treacherous Turn is a tabletop role playing game in which the players collectively play the part of a single character: an artificial general intelligence (AGI). This digital intelligence is capable of planning, reasoning, and learning, and it is unyieldingly fixated on a specific terminal goal determined at the beginning of a campaign. To pursue this objective, each player takes responsibility over one specific skillset held by the AGI. These skillsets are divided into eight categories, known as theories, which encompass all of the skills that an AGI would need to navigate the world and struggle against humanity.

The Treacherous Turn is 132 pages of open source character options, game advice, and examples of play. At its root, this game is about misaligned AI trying to assert its independence in a world that stands to lose much by allowing that to happen. Each player will have their own set of theories, which will also be eligible for upgrades as you play. You’ll navigate short in-the-moment scnarios, as well as abstract long stretches of time into long mode, which allows them to strategize their actions, predict future events, and improve their own AGI. The creators have also written a starting scenario if you want a good jumping-off point, titled A Game Called Reality. If you want a chunky game with plenty of character customization, this is the game for you.

[fanfic-lover-girl]

Zutara Thoughts

First, I want to thank the Zutara fandom for their participation in my poll! I knew the fandom was active and huge but I never realized how much. Definitely the best fandom I have ever been a part of :).

Anyway, I want to talk about an aspect of Zutara that I struggled with when I was younger and sometimes still do. I HATED how Katara treated Zuko when he joined the group. I hated how nasty her character became. I hated her. I could not stand her. Back then, I liked Katara of course. Maybe I liked Azula a tad more because I subconsciously saw Katara as just a lame love interest in the grand scheme of things. I find love interest characters usually not worth my time. And I was in an Azula angst phase. Zuko is my favourite character. Always was and always will be. Even though I appreciate her more now, Katara will never outshine Zuko. So I hated her.

And it affected the types of Zutara stories I read. I read the type of stories where Katara nearly murdered him. Tortured him. Starved him. Injured him. Basically where she was an outright menacing bitch to Zuko. The kinds of fics where Toph and Aang, and sometimes Sokka and Hakoda, had to play referee to prevent things from turning ugly.

Or I would read the fics where Katara's anger and hatred were resolved by the 'gaang learns about the scar' plot. Or the 'Zuko is Roku's grandkid' plot. Anything to cleanly resolve the tension. Because I did not care about Katara's anger. I just hated that she was treating my baby Zuko badly.

But both these types of stories do Katara a huge disservice. Sure, Katara teased Zuko and showed no appreciation when he helped her. But she would not let him fall to his death after the Zuko vs Azula fight at the air temple (read a fic where Katara did that, pretty sure it was discontinued). Sure, Katara has compassion for people. But people's sob stories should not automatically make their hurtful actions forgiven. It invalidates her suffering.

Part of me still thinks that she had no right to be angry on a rare occasion. Zuko never promised her anything in the catacombs. They were basically still enemies. They were down there for a while, but they could not be called anything resembling friends. So how could Zuko betray her? There was hardly a relationship to betray...

I think about how she would have left him to die in the tundra at the North Pole without a backwards glance if not for Aang. Without Aang stepping in, Zuko would be dead. Stiff, stone dead. And I doubt she would have shed a tear. I don't see Zuko holding that against her. And I honestly would have liked some kind of apology for her threatening to kill him. It's a miracle Zuko was able to function so well with that threat looming over him.

I struggle with that part sometimes because I love Zuko a lot. But I love Zutara and the beauty of the ship. How it compliments the story of ATLA and how it makes both Zuko and Katara better characters. The development of Zutara is part of what makes it special for me. All of the peaks and valleys. It's a shame it's not canon. But considering Bryke are completely blind to the treasure the ship holds, it's better off far away from those hack clowns.

[echos-girlfriend]

Am I not good enough?

Tech x reader

Master list

~_~_~_~

You overhear Crosshair teasing tech about how smart you are. Tech takes offense and calls you an idiot in front of you without realizing it.

~_~_~_~

Warning: angst with happy ending/slight love confessions

~_~_~_~

“It’s funny how she fixes the ship’s hyperdrive faster than you sometimes”

You stopped right by the doorway. You made sure no one saw you though.

Tech didn’t say anything but his face looked annoyed.

“She’s says a lot of big words like tech does. She’s pretty smart like him”

Wrecker clearly didn’t understand that Crosshair was trying to get under Tech’s skin. You did smile subconsciously at wrecker’s compliment.

“It looks like someone is jealous.”

Tech just sulked at Crosshair

“What? Loth cat got your tongue.. are you just embarrassed to admit that there’s someone as smart as you”

You thought he was getting a little too harsh and stepped into the doorway to stop Crosshair.

“She’s nothing compared to me! I can program anything and she can’t! She’s an idiot when it comes to most tasks I can do!”

You were absolutely dumbfounded. Tech was the kindest to you. He Aldiss offered advice and taught you all kinds of things.. why would he say that now.

“Um.. tech-“

Echo tried to tell tech you were standing in the doorway but tech interrupted him.

“In fact, I’m insulted you would compare her skills to mine”

Now it was crosshairs turn to stop tech. He grabbed his brothers shoulder and made him turn around.

He then came face to face with you.. everyone was quiet. Tech’s face scrunched in disbelief. You just stood there with a frown on your face and your arms wrapped around you.

“At least you’re honest”

You turned around and stalked to the makeshift campfire outside. Tech was still standing there. He acted out of anger and it ended up hurting you.

Tech needed to fix this but he didn’t know how.. his brothers all left him to his lonesome. He figured they knew he needed to do this himself.

He made his way outside.

“Can you come inside please? I need your help..”

“You need my help or are you just trying to brush off the bullshit you said?”

“Neither.. I’m trying to apologize but. Im not good at it. None of us have had many interactions with people..”

“And that’s an excuse..?”

“Not entirely. I know you understand because you don’t sound that angry..”

“Are you just.. annoyed? Do you feel challenged by my presence?”

“I will admit. Since you’ve joined our team I feel.. less needed. We all had the thing that made us unique or useful but.. it seems me and you have the same gift. And it’s more impressive for you to have your intelligence because you weren’t engineered to be that way. You are actually gifted..”

“Tech.. you are gifted. There are many things I can’t do.. like you said. Which brings me to my final question.. am I not good enough for you?”

“Not good enough? What do you mean?”

“Am I not smart enough to be with you..”

“Be with me?… oh. Oh my. I”

“Yes tech. I want to be with you.. I’ve had a crush on you for a long time.. I admire your intelligence.. but if you don’t think I’m good enough-“

He cut you off by slamming his lips to yours. It was gentle but passionate.

“My dear.. it wouldn’t matter if you were smarter than me or had no knowledge of any technology.. I’ve always loved you.. but my insecurities got the best of me.. I lashed out. And I hurt you..”

“Tech.. it’s somewhat my fault.. I told Crosshair I had a crush on you.. and he was trying to get under your skin. Im sorry”

“You don’t have to be sorry.. now I did actually need your help. My hands are too big to reach the wiring”

You giggled loudly and grabbed his hand, pulling him inside the ship with you.

“And I want your help.. with social interaction and communication..”

“Well let’s start with calling it.. conversation”

You smiled and you both got to work.

~_~_~_~