#I just wanted to sleep last night and deal with things tomorrow
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heartshattering · 7 months ago
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rambling below cut
Six great nights in a row (!!!!!!), then one not-so great night last night... 😵‍💫
I'm still coping a lot better than I normally would though. A similar situation would've turned me into a mess not too long ago, but this time it just felt like a minor blip. So I think I still deserve to be proud of myself. I wish I could prevent nighttime panic episodes altogether but at least I've gotten better at pulling myself out of them before they blow up too badly. I've figured out how to soothe myself without going into catastrophe mode. Plus I was able to finish something I was working on last night so now I'm able to go on a break until the end of the month (and honestly the work hanging over my head might have been one of the major factors contributing to my panic last night, so luckily I don't have to worry about that anymore).
Tonight will definitely go better since I figured out what went wrong and know how to tackle it. I just have to put in a little extra time for self-regulating and winding down (which should be easier since I got rid of one of my stressors already, and I've been keeping my healthy coping strategies in mind for when I feel overwhelmed). Last night wasn't the best but tbh it might have been necessary since it did push me into getting one big task out of the way (that I might have kept avoiding otherwise because of anxiety) and now I can relax more. I'm feeling way better now and today has been going alright so far so I'm glad. It will be okay.
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dandyshucks · 2 months ago
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sorry for another "i wont be as active for a bit" post (and then i'll probably come crawling back rly soon like all the other times bc i learn to cope w worsening conditions and return my usual haunts again fdsjkl) but uhmm i cannot draw and i can barely think straight. so we're going the "less active" route it seems! not that it matters much but. just in case it does last longer than a few days that's the update o7
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youremyonlyhope · 7 months ago
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why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up
#i'm overthinking something that i did and was told off for doing by my director#and on my way home i was thinking when was the last time i was even talked to like that during a production#and then i remembered the costume experience from hell of only a couple months ago that i've already began blocking out#but the thing is that that person was someone i knew i'd never have to work with again#i mean at first i thought i would have to work with them more. then they announced they were moving away immediately#so i only had to deal with them face to face for another weekish after that point and anytime they yelled at me#i was like 'cool. i'll do exactly what you say to do. and nothing more.' but then of course me being me#i did some extra stuff and they initially were like 'oh that's pretty' and then days later told me to cut everything i added#and like sure i get that the show was frozen but girl. that costume was unfinished. i was trying to finish it. it was frozen but looked bad#anyway. whenever they yelled at me and had actual malice in their heart i was like whatever. i was hurt. but i didn't care as much.#but this time it's someone i've worked with many many times before and it was about a habit i have that i know isn't great#but at the same time the thing that prompted it wasn't even me doing this habit it was something else#but she interpreted it as that habit and said that i can't do that on a production she's directing#and that if i couldn't stop then i could pull out from the production and there'd be no hard feelings between us#and honestly i think her reassuring that she knows i'm valuable and that she wants me there while also telling me not to do this thing#and the fact that she's someone i like working with and will continue to work with just made it all hurt so much more#especially since she referenced another past production we've done where i didn't even realize she had noticed that i do this.#and i found myself in near tears. and still am kind of in near tears. i can't decide if i need to cry or not.#and i had NO sleep last night so i was looking forward to sleeping tonight but now i'm just overthinking EVERYTHING#and like. i know everything will be fine. if i just stop inserting myself and stick to just my specific tasks. it'll be fine.#but this is one of the ways my ocd manifests. i feel like i have to personally fix something i notice going wrong. or it'll be bad.#because every single time i choose to sit back and not be nosy when i notice something it ends up bad in a way i could have prevented#if i just inserted myself in a situation i technically wasn't part of but knew i could help or fix. so i just need to not do that.#but then i feel guilt if it does go wrong in the ways i immediately assumed it would and in a way i could prevent.#and i've been trying to work on this for like 6 months and aaaahhhh it's hard and being called out on it from her just really really hurt#i still may or may not cry. i don't know. the irony of me telling my therapist THIS MORNING that it's been a while since i last cried.#and the universe being like 'i took that as a challenge' and handing me this situation for me to spiral over.#i need to leave things alone. i need to stare straight ahead. and ignore whatever isn't specifically for me to do. but ahhh i want to help#and then of course my mom has this same habit and it annoys me when she does it yet i do it to other people and ahhhhhhhh#brain please just shut up. i need to sleep. i have to work tomorrow.
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considerad · 1 month ago
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sooooo my flight's been cancelled :)
I get an extra week on holiday here while the Greater Powers decide if they're at war or not
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loverboybrightsideghost · 1 month ago
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they should invent a way to ask if you have felt suicidal or have had suicidal thoughts at the doctor when they ask where you'll answer truthfully. i am fine and i always fight the suicidal thoughts but i went to the urgent care the other day and they asked and i said no no nothing like that. but i lied! of course i have! i've been vaguely fantasizing about getting hit by a car the past few days!!! i truly hate suicide for Reasons, it makes me incredibly sad and distressed, and for myself sometimes i don't even realize it's started creeping into my head again (i'm fine i genuinely promise) but like. as much as i hate it, it's there in some of my friends and me and i have to wonder about the fact that "yeah, but doesn't everyone at least a little bit?" isn't the right answer.
#bluebird.txt#i'm like sociologically interested why it's so 'popular' or common for people to joke about killing themselves#again. i fucking hate it. i abhor it. i detest it. but the fact is that is how people talk.#and i wonder how many of those people are truly suicidal and how many have never had to ever worry night after night#if the last time they saw their friend would be the last time. if they went to sleep thinking please let them be at school tomorrow.#please let them text me back.#at least you're still here.#how many people who say 'i'm gonna kill myself!!!' over a stupid insignificant test have actually felt that looming horror#how many of those people have truly felt in their souls that life is not worth living and that no one would notice if they weren't there#tomorrow#i ask genuinely. how many? is it that bad that we're all suicidal? am i right in saying 'doesn't everybody feel like that?'#or are some of you just being dramatic cunts who don't know what the fuck they're saying#or has everyone gone through at least one thing that would make them want to end it and am i just being cruel?#i am a positive person. this is partially bc it is in my nature to be excited abt things but mostly it is on purpose.#every day it is on purpose. it's a habit ive built and sometimes the habit falters. sometimes i don't realize when ive started slipping.#but eventually i always do and it sucks shit and it's hard as fuck and annoying as fuck bc it's so much easier to lay down and never#get up again but i fucking choose to get up because life is meant to be lived and you have to live on purpose in order#for your life to be anything that YOU want it to be rather than living in everyone else's world#you have to live in purpose. i live on purpose. and it annoys me so strongly#that there seem to be (again i could be wrong and arrogant and cruel for assuming this) so many people#for whom it takes very little effort to get up in the morning#people who don't spend like 99% of their time Thinking and Thinking and cancelling out the Bad Thinking on purpose#people for whom life is if not easy bc it's not easy for anybody than who don't have to deal with the fucking baggage some of us have#maybe i'm arrogant. maybe years of being told i'm weird and i still haven't managed to get rid of the instinct to make that gap even bigger#maybe maybe maybe. but also i think maybe some of you should shut the damn fuck up and enjoy what you have. if i can then so can you.
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s-ccaam-era-crepe · 3 months ago
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the gall of some people- wait what’s a better word for gall I don’t like that one
#camera talks#sorry ANWYAYS. the Audacity of my coworker rn I’m like. actually laughing at her in my brain#I’m sorry but ‘I just feel like you aren’t helping out during the morning as much as I need you to be scam’#and ‘idk what you were doing the first 45 mins but when I asked you to help out and you kept doing sandwiches’#okay first off I set up Everything by myself this morning. coffee station. 3 tables. bread station. yogurts. fruit salad. the buffet#etc#half of which was supposed to be done last night but no one did itttt#secondly I told her ‘yeah let me finish this one sandwich and I’ll help out. because I already had sandwich gloves on so I wanted to finish#and gahhh it’s just so annoying. girl I did so fucking much this morning#breakfast wouldn’t be out without literally everything I did and youre asking me ‘oooh scam can I have some more help-#bc I don’t feel like you’re helping enough’ fuck off#she also mentioned she feels like I can’t hear her with one earbud in and Fuck That. I am not giving up my music at 6 in the morning#that’s the Only thing keeping me from kms on the commute so fuckkkk you#god whatever this probably seems super irrational but I’m just pissed that the assistant cook who gets paid way more than me#gets to ask me to do her job for her but I Cannot ask her to do dishes god Forbid#sorry guys I woke up at 4:30 and had to drive by 5:30 can you tell I got shitty sleep#also I have a dentist tomorrow Again and I don’t think that’s helping my emotions rn but alas. I’m at work so I can’t make a panic post#about the dentist Now that will have to wait#also no I’m not done yet cuz#also like yeah I’m aware this is real life adult shit that I’ll have to deal (shitty coworkers)#but it still sucks like. if I can think through my words and stuff to her and I’m ND and told I’m bad at social situations#(I don’t beleive that necessarily but no one cares so whatever)#then she can think about it and come to a reasonable thought as well and it just makes me upset#rahhh
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parasolids · 3 months ago
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i am having a genuine core memory type of bad day today like serious SERIOUS things are going down and i missed a flight because genuine life changing events are happening and got put on standby for another which got delayed multiple times til i would’ve missed my connecting flight home and anyways it was overbooked so i didn’t make it on, and then now five hours after they left me at the airport im finally heading home and i was like “well at least i can eat the fries i bought that i didn’t get to eat yesterday” but my useless cousin who has not only been completely useless through this weeks long ordeal but has also been making things worse stepped in and ate the whole giant box of fries cause he “thought we were leaving” even though my mom clearly left half her stuff behind at the house and told him we did not make our flight so she was going to stay in town and try and get me home and also this whole situation (except for the fries) is straight up my fault cause i didn’t wanna get out of bed for 20 minutes when we woke up and like normally this would be fine especially since i went to bed at 2 am packing suitcases and then had to wake up at 7 and also slept super poorly anyways but i still have no self discipline and everything has gone wrong because of that
#i should be freshly showered and in bed right now having a good cry#i’m genuinely seething at my cousin btw we keep asking him to do the most basic things and he makes some excuse#and then it turns out to be a lie#like my cousin is stronger/bigger than i am so my mom wanted his help w the suitcases#and we went out for one last dinner last night but he kept telling my mom he wanted to go home and sleep bc his job starts early#and getting irritated at her when she tried to take two minutes to finish eating#anyways we went home early and he did not go to bed. we could hear him gaming and yelling at the computer til we went to bed at 2 am#and his job starts at 3 am so he can’t have actually been worried about sleeping#oh he also just didn’t go to work and this is like a repeated occurrence#and he didn’t bother seeing us off to the airport or wake up til like 11#when i called him saying we needed him to bring my passport and it was an emergency#idk this all seems like super trivial but my mom is straight up handling a tragedy alone#i won’t deny that i haven’t really been useful but i’ve been coming along everywhere on top of remote working from here#meanwhile he’s kinda just been at home gaming and not leaving his room#i can kind of excuse his brother who’s also been at home but he’s also like super obviously been prepping for a super rough final and idk#ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. can you at least have some decency and like#try not to pile more work on my mother who is dealing with one of the worst things that can happen to her#and try to use your parents not being around as an excuse to run around town with your friends#while lying to my mom and saying you need to sleep or work or yeah you’ll be straight home (you’re going for lunch with your buds)#i mentioned something about how i’ve spent time with him instead of my friends when he’s visiting us and he was like ‘you have friends?’#i don’t know man i can’t cry in bed i can’t sleep cause they keep the house cold#basic functioning is making me miserable with the brain issues i don’t know what to do#cause if i go home im going to be in the exact same situation just#with a better bathroom and a guitar and feeling useless and sad because i can’t help#anyways i need to text my boss to let her know no shot i can make it tomorrow#which feels awful cause i was supposed to get back A WEEK AGO i had to extend i hate it here i hate it here i hate it here
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phagodyke · 1 year ago
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nvm im too tired and overstimulated for this shit
#.vent#i only slept a couple hours last night man. i cant do short notice evening socials on an empty tank let alone resist unexpected rsd#if they had let me know earlier then i wouldve taken a nap and worked out beforehand to get my energy back up#idk just. if u rly want my company then maybe u should actually invite me next time. its not like they didnt plan it#even if they just forgot its not particularly pleasant to be the one person insignificant enough to forget abt. theres only 5 of us#they rly remembered to ask the one guy who isnt even here before me yknow. ugh u see the stupid thoughts i have to battle!!#like on a rational level ik it was probably genuinely accidental. but the way i instinctively react is not always rational#so regardless someone has to deal with the emotional fallout and thats me. regulating this shit is hard work even when im NOT tired asf#i really really dont want to be an asshole and spoil anyones fun bc its no-ones fault + as real as it feels to me rn ik im overreacting#but i cant voluntarily expose myself to personal triggers when im already exhausted + more vulnerable than usual#so just gotta shut myself in my room and deal with it in my own super healthy ways as per usual. may they never fucking find out#trying my best not to be an asshole i hope to fucking god they dont think im being an asshole i just told them i was tired + i meant it#this wouldnt be so much of a problem if it hadnt happened to me before. and also ik its bc one rsd trigger makes me more sensitive-#to picking up unrelated cues but there ARE other things they do that i find ostracising which rly dont fucking help. but-#theyre not things i can actually confront them abt so usually i just gotta deal w it which is fine but it lowers my general tolerance#its ok. its ok i like them all a lot theyre lovely ppl and it doesnt matter if there is a some grain of truth in the things im thinking#bc the risk of me believing + acting on a bad faith irrational thought leads to outcomes that are far worse than those from#misidentifying someones malicious behaviour towards me as neutral by accident/in good faith. okay im done now i think#just ignore me spewing out the old brain gunk on main again eurgh anyway im gonna go calm myself and read and SLEEP#ill be normal by tomorrow morning farewell comrades#honestly i dont mind dealing w shit this way bc its the best option for everyone but man. sometimes its so fucking lonely#like there are sides of me ppl will never engage with and for good reason but without them being acknowledged i find it rly hard to feel-#any real emotional intimacy or closeness with another person. but what other option is there#i sure as hell dont miss the fights i used to constantly get into when i wasnt able to regulate myself i lost so many friends that way#it is what it is. on we go for now
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coldfanbou · 7 months ago
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It Started as a Rental
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So to explain this piece, me and @i-am-lifeform24 were both struggling and decided to challenge each other with a concept decided by the other person.
Length 2.9K
Hanni X Mreader
Waiting outside the cafe, you look around, waiting for your date to arrive. You flick through your phone, looking through her profile again. “Hey? Is this you?” You look down at the petite woman in front of you, her long, straight hair swinging as she comes to a stop. It was your girlfriend for the night, Hanni. She held her phone up to you, showing your profile. 
“Yeah, that’s me. Let’s head inside,” You say, opening the door to the cafe and letting her in first. As you order and sit down, you think about your situation. It was a bit pathetic having to rent a girlfriend, but you thought it necessary. Your sister’s wedding was coming up, and you didn’t want to be the only one without a partner; you had bluffed your way into making your family believe you were dating. You just need to find the right woman to bring with you, and Hanni was the first profile you liked after a friend told you about the website for renting girlfriends.
“It’s nice to meet you,” you say nervously, trying to start a conversation. 
“Let’s get down to business before this date really begins,” she says politely, with a hint of amusement. Getting this part out of the way first is a lot easier. So, you hired me for five days, one of them being a wedding. I hope you're prepared to play the role of a loving boyfriend." She ruffles through her purse as she looks for something. “You saw my rate on the website; there is just the matter of extras that I personally provide.”
You give her a quizzical look, “Extras? What do you mean extras?”
“Well, most guys want to have sex, and that costs extra. The website might say sex isn’t allowed, but I’m willing to make some…under the table deals. There are limits to what I’m willing to do, and each thing will raise the price, so I just need you to fill this out so I can name a price.” Hanni hands you the piece of paper with kinks listed on one side and prices on the other. 
“Uhm, I’m not interested in this. I just need you for the wedding and these few days to get to know you.”
“Oh, well, that's alright then. I’ll just bring this along with me if you change your mind,” Hanni says, somewhat surprised. She grabs the paper and places it back in her bag. Let’s have fun these next few days.” Hanni puts her bag down and gives you a gentle smile as your drinks arrive. The next few days, you and her go out to different places, and you learn more about her. After your initial worry melts away, you begin to feel close to her.
The day before the wedding, you meet with Hanni again. As you walk by your cafe meeting spot, you find her munching on a piece of bread. She excitedly waves at you, “Right here!” She yells with a mouthful of bread. You take a seat beside her, feeling a little shy as you feel her kiss your cheek. “Did you sleep well?” 
You give her a nod, “Yeah, I slept well. Thanks for asking, did you?” 
“Mhmm! I dreamt of you last night.” She says with a giggle. 
“The wedding is tomorrow. Are you ready?”
“Ready as can be,” Hanni says, taking a sip of her coffee before returning to her bread. “I have my dress picked out and everything. She grabs your hands suddenly; you can feel the crumbs on her fingers as she intertwines your hands. “I’m really nervous about meeting your family. Do you think they’ll like me?”
“I’m sure they’ll love you, Hanni. Come on, we have a busy day ahead of us.” You say as you stand up, taking Hanni by the hand as you walk out of the cafe. Spending the day looking at clothes for the wedding, you can’t help but think about Hanni’s beauty and just how cute she was. Hanni lifted a dress off one of the racks, placing it in front of herself and imagining how she looked in it. 
“Do you think this is okay?” The dress she chose was a simple black one; it had oval gaps along the chest as a distinguishing feature. It wouldn’t attract any attention at the wedding otherwise. “I think I’m going to try it on,” Hanni says before scurrying to the closest changing room. She comes out a few minutes later wearing her chosen dress. You looked her up and down; she looked cute. If she had a different shirt under it, it would look better, and you told her so. Hanni pouted before looking around the store and finding a shirt she thought would look better. It had some slight frills that she liked, and as she came back out of the dressing room, you thought she was right. Her outfit was nearly perfect. “How about now?”
“You look great,” you gulp, “Really pretty.” You bring a smile to Hanni's face. She jumps toward you, wrapping her arms around you. You slowly wrap your arms around her, enjoying the hug until you feel her arms tap your side. You let her go, and she changes back to her regular clothes before you begin to search for your clothes. You’re forced to change into several outfits as Hanni hands you several different pieces of clothing, unsatisfied with each one. “Hanni! We’ve gone through so many clothes. Is there nothing that looks good?” You complain.
She brings you another outfit and kisses your cheek as she hands it to you. “I’m sure this is the one.” Her soft smile is enough to convince you, and you head back into the dressing room. As you come back out, Hanni claps her hands, her teeth shining, and she smiles. “That’s the one!” Hanni walks around you, looking it over one more time as she compliments it. As you head to the register, you pay for both sets of clothes. “I can pay for the dress and shirt.”
“No, I got it. Let me take care of it.”
Hanni looks at her feet for a second, and a small sniffle escapes her before she meets your eyes. “Thank you.” After you leave the building, Hanni spins around on her heel, beaming a smile to you.“We have everything now.”
“Yeah, I can pick you up tomorrow for the wedding.”
“No, no. I’ll meet you at your place. Just give me the address. I’ll be there early in the morning.” 
You nod your head. “Alright, that sounds good.” After you give her directions, you and Hanni part ways for the day. 
As you walk away, Hanni grabs your arm, turns you around, and presses her lips onto yours, having to stand on her tippy toes to do so. “There, now we can say bye. Get home safely.” She says with some concern in her voice.
“You get home safely, too.” 
Early the next morning, you wake up after hearing a knock on your door. Hanni is waiting in her wedding outfit. You blink a few times and rub your eyes as you stare at her. She had added a pair of thigh-high socks with a small bow design around her knees and a bow around her head. She gives you a simple smile. “Wake up, sleepy head.” She says cheerily. Today’s the big day, and we need to get you ready. I’ll make you breakfast while you get yourself dressed, okay?”
“Yeah, thanks, Hanni.” You say before kissing the top of her forehead. 
She playfully pushes you away, her small hands cupping your cheeks. “Stop!” She yells, a smile on her face. “You’re going to ruin my makeup. Go change already, mister.” She watches you walk into your room, looking over her shoulder to make sure you didn’t sneak up on her. When you come back out a few minutes later, Hanni is sitting by the counter with an omelet. “You…didn’t have very much in your fridge.” She says weakly.
“Today is when I normally go for the groceries,” You reply. 
Hanni pats the seat next to her, “Sit. Let me feed you.” You follow along, sitting next to her as she stabs into the eggs and brings some to your lips. “Say Ahhh.” You open your mouth and take in the freshly cooked eggs. Hanni giggles as she watches you chew. “How is it? Good?”
“Yeah, it’s good. Thanks, Hanni, you’re a pretty good cook.”
“You have to be when you like food,” she says with a chuckle. Now, eat up; we have to get there early.” Hanni takes the time to wipe your face. “You look very handsome in this,” she says as her eyes meet yours.
“You look beautiful too. I really like the bows; they’re cute on you.” You pinch Hanni’s cheek; it’s squishy. You finish breakfast before heading to the chapel, where you introduce Hanni to your family. She greets them well, making a good first impression. 
“I think they like me.” She says as she sits next to you on the bench. 
“Why wouldn’t they like you? You’re so cute and cuddly.”
“Don’t embarrass me!” Hanni slaps your hand away as you try to pinch her cheeks. She gives you a cute pout, her eyebrows furrowing as she tries to look angry. A few seconds later, she breaks, smiling and laughing, and she links her arm around yours. “I hope this part isn’t too long. I get antsy if I sit for too long.” Lucky for the two of you, it was a short ceremony, and you were soon off to the party.
You felt happy with Hanni by your side as you made your way to your seat. She attracted some attention as people asked how she ended up with you. It hurt your pride that they would ask that in front of you, but Hanni’s response made you feel warm and fuzzy inside. “Why wouldn’t I be? He’s kind and makes me feel safe. He makes me feel special when we’re together. I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else.” She’d say those words while she held your hand, sometimes holding your arm tightly. As you sat down with her, Hanni scooted her chair closer. “Some of your family can be very mean. Do we have to stay here for a long time? I’d rather just spend my time with you.” 
“Just a little while. They’re going to want to do a few dances.” Hanni nods her head, staying by you the entire party. When it was time for the couple dances, Hanni gripped you tightly; your hand and shoulder felt like they were going to be crushed. “A little looser would be great, Hanni.”
“Oh, sorry,” Hanni says as she loosens her grip. You stare into her eyes, knowing she’ll be gone after this. You can’t help but get a little teary-eyed as you look at her. Hanni tilts her head, giving you a confused look. “Don’t cry. There’s no way it hurt that much.” She says, wiping away your tears with one of her hands. “There, all better.” She places her head on your chest as the dance continues. Once it was over, you and Hanni took your leave, wishing everyone well before making your way home. “That was fun, wasn’t it?” She says as she kicks her shoes off. 
You take a seat on the couch, taking a deep breath before looking over at Hanni. She strolls over to you, her hair swaying as she comes to a stop in front of you. She places a hand over your chest and straddles you. You’re caught off guard by her actions. “Hanni?”
“Just this once, I won’t charge you,” You’re confused by her words, but your train of thought goes off the tracks when you feel her press her lips against yours. Her hands move down your biceps to your forearms before she places your hands on her waist. Her hands shift to your shoulders, holding onto them as you feel her grind against you.  
You hold your lips against Hanni’s, your hands digging into her. When you finally break apart, you stare at each other in silence. Hanni undoes the buttons on her dress and lifts it over her shoulders, leaving her in her shirt. You kiss her neck softly as she begins to lift her shirt; your hands snake under it, and you squeeze her modest chest through her bra as she throws it off. Your eyes move up and down her body, taking in her perfectly smooth skin and the clothes she was left in. All that remained were her bra, panties, and her thigh highs. You run your fingers along her spine, moving up toward her bra. You can feel her shiver. Unlatching her bra, you drop it to the floor. You lean in and kiss Hanni’s chest, leaving a trail of kisses as you move upward. She cranes her neck back, cooing. “Take your clothes off, too.” She whines. 
You stop for her, throwing your blazer and shirt off with haste. Hanni helps you with your pants, having to stand up to pull them off you. Now clad in only your underwear, you stare into Hanni’s eyes again. You both knew what you wanted. You leaned down and picked Hanni up. Carrying her to the bedroom, she wrapped her arms and legs around you, clinging to you as you kissed her neck again. 
You dropped Hanni onto your bed, on top of her, before you stripped her of her underwear. She was shaved. As your eyes wander upward, you notice her breathing heavily. You take the time to get rid of the last piece of clothing keeping you from one another. Crawling back over her, you press your lips against hers, your hands running up and down her thighs. You felt her thigh highs; the thin fabric was smooth to the touch, allowing your hands to continue gliding over her. Hanni spreads her legs slowly, and you take notice. You glance down and reach for her slit. Hanni trembles as she feels your fingers run along it. A gentle moan escapes her lips as you tease her.  Hanni holds onto the bedsheets as her mind becomes filled with the pleasure you’re giving her. 
Your fingers were becoming slick as you teased Hanni, your cock began to ache as you watched the petite woman enjoy herself. Your cock tapped against her belly. Hanni looked down and reached for it, her small hand struggling to wrap around it. You groan as her palm rubs against the head. “Don’t tease me anymore,” Hanni moans. She stretches her legs outward and pulls apart her lips. You take a step back, taking in every detail. “Please…fuck me.”  
You gulp and nod your head slowly. Aligning yourself with Hanni’s cunt you push the head in slowly, watching her reaction. Hanni cranes her neck, her eyes closed as she grips the sheets and lets out a deep groan. You hold onto Hanni’s waist, shuddering as you feel her walls squeezing your cock from all sides. You push more inside of Hanni, feeling her walls split apart as you move deeper into her. You moan her name, feeling her walls tighten around you as you do. 
Hanni grabs your wrists, gripping them tightly. “Keep going; I feel so full.” You thrust the rest of your cock inside. Both of you moan loudly, filling the room with the sound. Hanni wraps her legs around your waist; you can feel her feet trying to push you further inside.  You remain buried inside Hanni for a moment, allowing you both to catch your breath. You thrust slowly at first before picking up some speed. Hanni’s warm and wet walls rub the head of your cock as you push in, granting you great pleasure. Her moans are like music to your ears, but you can’t resist her lovely lips. You steal a kiss from her, muffling her beautiful moans. Her arms wrap around your head, keeping you connected to her. 
The rhythm of your thrusts breaks down as you go on; you can feel yourself nearing your climax. Hanni’s walls began to squeeze you tighter as well. You met her eyes and saw she was reaching her limit. “Hanni, I’m going to cum.”
“Me too,” She whimpers; her hands wrap around you tightly, and she pushes you in deeper with her legs. “It’s okay if you cum inside,” She whispers into your ear.
You give her a few more thrusts before cumming inside of her cunt. Hanni’s wall clamps down on your cock as you trigger her climax. You paint her walls white as her cunt greedily takes it all. 
Pulling out slowly, you stare at Hanni’s body. She had a thin layer of sweat over her. You fall beside her, staring at her. She turns onto her side, staring back at you. A soft smile forms on her face. “I’d love it if we could meet again.” She says with a hint of shyness in her voice. There’s a moment of silence between the two of you, “I…um, had a really good time with you these past few days. You weren’t like the others.” Hanni pauses again, “I meant what I said at the wedding. You’re really a good guy, and…” Hanni struggles to find the words. “Do…you want to meet again? I mean…without the website.”
You caress Hanni’s cheek, your thumb moving across it gently. She places her hand over the top of yours. “I’d love to go on another date.” Hanni gives you a sincere smile and moves closer to you, burying her head in your chest as you both drift off to sleep.
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gojonanami · 9 months ago
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❝ 𝐒𝐔𝐃𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐋𝐘, 𝐈 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐀 𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐄 ! ❞
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❝ HONESTLY, I CAN'T BELIEVE I GET TO CALL YOU MINE !! ❞
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✧ pairing: professor! suguru geto x reader
✧ summary: it's your first valentine's day as a couple with suguru, but he's away for a conference in another city -- and you understand you do, but you can't help but miss him -- so what happens when he ends up surprising you?
✧ warnings: so fluffy!!, suggestive, mentions of nsfw, implications of smut, reader has graduated from her program, set after the events of the main series (including every part), these two idiots are so in love its ridiculous, lingerie mention, wearing his glasses and button down
✧ wc: 1,206
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“I’m sorry I have to be away,” you smile at Suguru through the screen, knowing that you’d kiss his furrowed brow away if he was here, before finding his lips with yours. “This conference was last minute, I wish I didn’t have to go, but Yaga left me little choice but to go,” 
You shake your head, “We can celebrate when you come back, it’s not a big deal anyway. Just means you have more to make up for on White Day,” you tease, and he laughs, a smile on his lips for the first time the entire call, “don’t worry ok? I’m really not upset,” 
“I know, it’s just our first Valentines together and I know you had planned something for us. I really wanted it to be special,” his lips purse, arms crossed as he looks almost utterly hopeless (far too cute) and you can’t help but chuckle, “what?” 
“Never thought my hardass professor could be such a romantic,” you smirk, as his cheeks are tinted with a lovely red, “should I be giving you a poor grade for your tardiness?” 
He rolls his eyes, as his lips curl again in a smile that can’t seem to escape your presence, “Well, while I’ll definitely be making it up with some extra credit, I’d appreciate my favorite student to cut me a little slack,” 
“I recall you cutting me very little slack that first day,” 
“On the contrary, I think I was very kind, especially considering you were late to the very first class—“ 
“And what is this weekend?” You say in mock thought, “our first Valentine’s Day?” He huffs, and you smile in victory, “is this the first headache I’ve given you?” 
“Today? Yes,” and you gape at him, and it’s his turn to smirk, “I love you,” 
And your gaze grows soft, “I love you too, call me after the conference is done for today?” 
“You know I will,” and you both share your goodbyes and you’re left by yourself, as you lay back on your bed, a pout on your lips. Suguru had offered to let you stay at his place, but you know it would have only made you miss him more — being surrounded by his things, his scent, his clothes. You sighed as you buried your face in your pillow, glancing at the picture the two of you had taken in Kyoto at one of the local shrines, almost taunting you. 
He’d be back soon enough — right? 
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Sorry I haven’t been able to call again. It’s been a lot of late nights — too many networking dinners. I’ll call you tonight. 
It has been two nights now, and it was Valentine’s Day tomorrow. You had barely gotten a minute to speak to Suguru since your call with him on Friday. You sighed, sending him a picture of you in his button up you stole, along with his spare glasses he had left at your place, can we have a networking meeting? I’ll send an invite to your calendar. 
I’ll clear my schedule. You smile. 
Another message, as soon as I get back. 
You pout, you expected as much — you shouldn’t have dated such an indemand academic. The horrors of academia. 
You laid back, forearm over your forehead as you stare back at your blank ceiling. It was fine, you really understood that he was busy, but you just — turning on your side to stare at his smiling face in the framed image on your bedside table before your eyes flutter shut — missed him. 
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You stir awake to lips pressed at your neck, soft kisses that draw you from the heavy arms of sleep, as your eyes flutter open to see Suguru, at your side. 
“Sugu?” And his fingers trace your jaw, as your brow furrows in confusion, “but isn’t it—“ 
“Happy Valentine’s Day, sweetheart,” he pulls a bouquet of flowers from behind him — an arrangement of your favorites, as you blink, brain seemingly struggling to keep up, “you okay?” 
Your fingers find his cheek, “is this a dream?” And he chuckles, as he leans down to plant a sweet kiss on your lips, before his fingers lightly pinch your cheek. And you’re sitting up only to jump into his arms, a gasp on his lips, as he chuckles, arms curling around you, raking his fingers through your hair. The bouquet lays forgotten on the side because truly the best gift was in your arms. 
“I missed you too,” he chuckles, as you bury your face in his chest, breathing in his scent, as if he’d disappear any second. 
You lean back to look up at him, “What are you doing back early?” 
“Made a deal with Yaga that I’d go to all the networking events he wanted, if he let me leave last night,” he kisses your forehead, “surprised?” 
“I am, the best surprise,” you find his lips in another kiss, “I was fine with you being busy, but I just missed you so much. It reminded me of all the time we had to spend apart — and I just know I can’t spend another minute without you,” you bite your lip, “I was going to wait until the end of the night, but,” you bite your lip, “I know we discussed moving in before — and I think I’m ready to,” 
He blinks, before a smile breaks out on his lips, “Are you sure?” And you wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him, lips sliding against his, as your hands slide back to cup his cheeks. 
You part, barely a breath apart, as you press your forehead against his, “Never been more sure of anything in my life — it’s definitely owed to us now, don’t you think?” 
He snorts, his eyes shining, as he presses another gentle kiss to your forehead, “Should we start looking for a place now?” And you grin, as you climb into his lap, a tilt of your head. 
“Don’t you want your Valentine’s Day gift?” You ghost kisses along his jawline, drawing a gasp from his lips, your hands guiding his own under his shirt you had stolen, “I had worn it last night just to try it on, but now,” you undo a few buttons of his shirt, a hint of red lace peeking through the undone collar. 
His clothed cock twitches through his slacks, as his fingers pull yours away, to undo the last remaining buttons to show a red and pink lingerie set — red lace hugged the outline of body with red hearts dotting along the design, sheer blush fabric left barely anything of your breasts and cunt to the imagination — not that he needed to imagine — he had practically memorized every curve and corner of your body. 
“Well?” And his fingers pull his shirt off of your body, as he’s gotten you pinned to the bed, as you giggle, lips parted, “I also baked you some sweet treats, baby,” 
His lips curl, as he leans down to meet your lips, as his breath warms your lips and his words warm your heart, “There’s only one sweet thing I want, right now.” 
The two of you never did get around to looking for a place together — not until the next day. 
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✧ a/n: this was supposed to come out earlier, but i fell asleep because i slept badly last night and ended up reading a manhwa when i got tired of trying to sleep. wrote this fic listening to laufey's valentine :) i also didn't tag everyone since this was kind of a last minute thing - sorry guys <;3
✧ taglist: @spider-fan72, @grunge-mo0n, @ameri-blog, @kentocalls, @peachyminx, @forest-fruits-jam, @hanxyy, @flyingtranscatofeffed, @sunflowmaryam, @regrettinglifechoices, @sugurus-fave-monkey, @atomicbxtch, @shinylightsalad
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crownremonique · 3 months ago
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I Need Your Help
Pairing: Tim Bradford x fem!reader
Fandom: The Rookie
Summary: When you find yourself in danger walking late at night, You think it's best to give Tim a call rather than trying to deal with it yourself.
Warnings: Mentions of attacking with weapon, Fluff, crying, comfort, (Tim being a huge softie)
Word count: 1.2k+ words
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Bright rays of sunshine slipped through the gap in the curtains, illuminating the room in soft hues of orange. You rubbed the sleep out of your eyes, trying to turn but stopping when you realised you couldn't. The weight of Tim's arm kept you pinned down to the mattress, his soft little snores vibrating on your skin. You craned your neck, just enough for his face to come into view. 
You always loved seeing Tim sleep peacefully, although it was becoming more rare. His job was taxing, draining him by the end of the day, and it filled you with happiness beyond words to see him relax by your side. The harsh furrow between his brows had disappeared, his face devoid of any signs of stress. 
“I can feel your eyes on me, honey” Tim spoke, his eyes still shut. 
“How long have you been awake?” You questioned, clearly being caught off guard. Tim's face broke into a smile as he opened his eyes, pulling you closer. 
“I just wish I didn't have to leave you so soon..” Tim spoke into your hair, drawing little patterns on your forearm. You hummed in agreement, inching closer. Eventually, Tim pulled himself away from you and started getting ready for the day, asking you your own plans. 
“I have some books I gotta return to the library, It’s the last day and I am NOT paying any late fees.” You concluded. Tim chuckled and kissed the top of your head. 
“Need me to drop you there? I can come pick you up on my break” He offered, with a gentle smile. 
“No need, I'll walk. I have to pick up some milk from the grocery store too.” You said. Tim shrugged one of his shoulders with a look that said “Whatever you say” and left the house, with a quick reminder for you to be careful. 
You also decided to get up and get started with some breakfast and then go out for the errands you had planned. What you didn't know was that you would come across a brownie cookie recipe on Pinterest, spend more than a few hours getting them perfect, and then surprise Tim with them at the station. 
When the realisation of how your time had flown by finally settled in, the thought of the unreturned books struck your mind. It was already well past eight, and you would be able to get to the library and back by ten if you hurried up. You briefly thought about Tim’s offer, but shut the idea down, not wanting to disturb him again after you already wasted plenty of his time dropping off your cookies. 
Pulling a jacket around your shoulders, you set out to the library. You were thankful that you got there soon, not wanting to carry the heavy books any longer. Dropping them off with the librarian, you made your way down the dark street, deciding if the milk could wait till tomorrow. 
Seeing the shortcut back through a narrow alley, you decided to take it, wanting to get out of the chilly night as soon as you could. You had taken that very shortcut lots of times, but always when it was light out. You were already halfway into the alley when you heard something shuffle behind you.
You turned around swiftly, planting your feet into the ground to steady yourself. 
You weren't stupid, you knew what was happening as soon as a man stepped out from behind the trash can, weapon in hand. Calming your breathing, you called out to the man. 
“I may not look like much, but I sure as hell can take you out” You said, making sure to raise your voice to get someone's attention in case things got out of hand. The man rushed forward, taking your words as an open challenge. He swung at your side with his knife, grunting when you seemingly dodged his attack with ease. All the time Tim spent teaching you self-defense really did come in handy after all. You managed to kick the man in his groin, stepping away when he doubled over in pain. 
You decided pretty quickly to run when you saw more people emerging from the shadows. You took off down the alley, as you heard the rest of the thugs follow behind. Your heart pounded in your ears, fear flowing through your veins. You definitely wouldn't be able to defend yourself alone from that many people, and the nearest public place was more than a mile away. Your last option? Call Tim. 
You ducked into one of the diversions of the road, and crouched down behind one of the storage units. Pulling out your phone and quickly dialling your boyfriend's number, you prayed that he would pick up. The phone had to ring only a few times before his voice came through. 
“Hello?” 
“I need your help. I'm being chased and cornered by some thugs. 822 E, 20th street” You cut him off, your voice trembling with fear. You heard the line go silent as he processed the information. 
“I'm on my way.” He said curtly, hanging up the phone. Tim rushed to the parking lot, shoving people out of the way. He barked at Lucy to get in the shop, ordering an entire team of cops to follow him. 
“Geez, what's gotten into him?” Nolan asked, staring at Tim's sudden change in behaviour. Nyla shrugged dismissively.
 “No idea, but with that enthusiasm, I can only assume he's going to come back with the greatest criminal in the history of LAPD.” 
You crouched on the floor, pulling your legs closer to you and hoping that Tim would get to you before the thugs did. The time you spent waiting for the cops was agonising, each moment stretching on for what seemed like forever, filled with anticipation of your fate. Your ears were just starting to ring from the silence when you heard the shuffling of footsteps a few metres from where you were hiding.
Your body had started shivering with terror as you tried to calm your breathing. Clasping a hand over your mouth, you tried not to let your shallow whimpers be heard. You jumped when the storage unit hiding you was ripped away, the man smirking and looking down at your trembling form.
“There you are..” the man taunted, grabbing you by your hair. You cried out in pain, as he tugged harder. He pulled you up to meet his eye, but dropped you immediately as a dozen flashlights pointed at you both, blinding him temporarily. 
“LAPD, Drop the weapon! Hands where we can see them, interlock them behind your head and get on your knees.” You heard Tim call out. Relief washed over you, the sight of Tim flooding you with a sense of safety. He kept his gun high and side stepped over to where you were crouched down. You fell into his embrace as you saw Lucy handcuff the man on the hood of their car. 
“Are you okay? Did he hurt you? I swear to god if he laid a finger on you I'm gonna-” You cut him off with a searing kiss, his shoulders relaxing as he felt you, safe in his arms. 
“I'm fine, don't worry about me..” You mumbled against his lips, running your hand through his hair. He buried his nose into the crook of your neck, inhaling deeply as he loosened his grip on your waist. “With you up my alley, I’ll be just fine.” You continued, your eyes welling up again as thoughts of what could have happened flooded your head.
“I am never letting you go anywhere alone again.” Tim declared, searching your eyes for any sign of objection. He never did find any.
✨️
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obeymeshallwedateaddict · 2 months ago
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The first 'I love you'
I've been writing so much angst recently that it's beginning to depress me sooo I decided to lift myself out of my melancholy by writing some fluff <3 I hope you enjoy it.
Summary: the brothers say "I love you" to MC for the first time.
You can read more of my work here: Masterlist
Contains: Fluff
GN!MC x each of the brothers
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Lucifer
Today was an especially long day for the first-born. It seemed like his responsibilities were endless. The demon had to go through piles of paperwork with a due date by tomorrow and make sure to send them to Diavolo along with dealing with his unruly brothers once more. By the end of the day Lucifer was completely spent. He sat himself in the cozy armchair of his study, gazing out the window when suddenly a thought of you flopped into his mind. He smiled to himself before picking up the phone to send you a quick message with the hopes of you accepting to come keep him company. And exactly as the demon had thought you accepted and showed up at the door of his study minutes after your response.
Now you and the first born were sitting together on the couch before the fireplace, watching the wood dissolve into ashes as well as the roar of the flames. You were listening to the soft crackle of the wood as it burned into the silence, which both you and him seemed to enjoy. Overall it was a peaceful evening. Over time you felt Lucifer's gaze land on you. You looked over at him just to see the softness of his expression. It was the first time you saw him gaze at you with such softness. He smiled gently at you before returning his gaze to the fire.
-For as long as I've lived I don't remember feeling as much at peace as I do now. –The demon mumbled and you smiled at his statement.
-You should know that... You're the reason I feel this way, MC. –Along with his words you felt Lucifer's hand land on top of yours. He held it gently, caressing the back of it with his thumb from time to time.
-What do you mean? –You question in a soft voice, waiting patiently for the demon's response. He took a deep breath and moved his gaze to you once again.
-I believe they call this feeling "love" from what I'm aware of. And I'm pretty sure that's what I'm feeling right now. I love you, MC... –Silence followed as the words sank into your mind. It was the first time he said those three words. You felt your cheeks heat up and a soft smile found its way onto your expression.
-Truly and deeply. –Lucifer whispered with a soft sigh, finishing off his last statement. His thumb caressed the back of your hand once again and soon enough you gained the courage to speak.
-Lucifer, I... I feel the same way.. I love you. –Upon hearing your words the demon pulled you flush against himself, into his embrace. He pressed a soft kiss to your temple. His lips lingered there for a moment before pulling away. But instead of letting you go he just proceeded to hold you close for the rest of the evening.
Mammon
Recently you noticed that the second-born was restless. He'd always run here and there, causing trouble or going to modeling gigs to earn some cash. He often had to endure Lucifer's punishments since he'd either skip class or sleep through it... Or.. he'd get a bad grade which wasn't something that rarely happened. One night just as you wer about to go to bed Mammon rushed into your room and grabbed your arm, pulling you away with him without saying a thing. You followed behind him since you had no other choice even if what you truly wanted was to lay in bed and fall into a peaceful slumber. Since you were only wearing your pyjamas you hoped that the demon wouldn't lead you somewhere out in public. But instead of that he led you to the attic. He pulled a ladder that led to the roof that both of you climbed.
Now you were sitting on the roof of The House of Lamentation, staring off into space along with Mammon. He sat there silently without saying a word, just staring into the night. Suddenly he moved closer towards you and put an arm around your shoulder. The movement came as a surprise to you but it was warmly welcomed. His body heat was radiating to you, keeping you warm.
-I saw ya shiverin' so I decided to do ya a favour and keep ya warm. Don't think much of it. –The demon mumbled and looked away from you, as if he was counting the stars, shining on the surface of the night sky. You chuckled to his words and shook your head. He'd always come up with an excuse to get close to you and you were pretty sure that was one of those moments.
-After all I wouldn't want my human to freeze eh? –He spoke and moved his gaze back to you as you rolled your eyes.
-Yeah. I wouldn't want that. –You murmur and snuggle closer to the demon. You saw his cheeks flush red and he quickly turned his face back towards the sky.
-Y'know.. you're the only person I truly wanna keep safe... –Mammon began speaking but stopped himself midway through. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair before continuing.
-MC, what I'm tryin' to say is that I.. that I love ya! Keep that in mind... –He speaks and you hear a soft gulp coming from him. Though that didn't stop you from getting flustered. After all Mammon had never actually said those exact words before. Of course he'd always hint to it but he never actually said it until now. You smiled and wrapped your arms around him in a warm hug.
-I love you too, Mams –You whisper and nuzzle your head into his shoulder. The demon chuckled smuggly and leaned in to press a soft kiss to your shoulder.
-'course you do. After all I'm The Great Mammon! All people love me.. –There was a fleeting pause before he continued.
-But hey.. don't go forgettin' what I said! There will be consequences if ya do! –He spoke and squeezed you tightly. You spend a few more minutes up on the roof before heading back to a warmer place.
Leviathan
A few days ago the third-born got a new game and he was really excited about it. From what he told you it was a dating simulator game with a catch at the end but neither did you or Levi know what the catch was. So one day you decided to be the first ones to find out. Both of you sat together in his room, picking up the controllers and begining to play. Of course Levi set you as the heroine so he and a couple of in-game bots were competing, trying to get the intimacy score up. As expected Levi was the one who managed to get the highest score but that didn't matter now. It was the end of the game and both of you were on your toes, waiting for the so called 'catch' that the game was announced with. You wandered around in the open game world but nothing was happening. There weren't monsters at the end like the other game you, Levi, Mammon, Satan and Lucifer once played. There wasn't anything interesting. Just the usual cherry blossom tree with the bench underneath it where Levi confessed his in-game love to you. After a couple more minutes of wandering and search for some kind of secret there might be in the game the third-born sighed and left the controller aside. He rubbed his temple before speaking.
-Such scammers. It's rare to encounter a game whose description doesn't fit the gameplay. That's so lame. –He groaned and pulled out his phone to write a review of the game.
-I mean.. we did have fun, right? –You speak and leave your controller next to his.
-I guess so. If you count all of the cringe things I had to do to get that intimacy score up fun then yes. Otherwise the game is pretty much trash. Though the graphics were kinda nice. I'll give it that. –You chuckle to his statement and move closer to him in an attempt to see what he was typing as a review. You felt the demon tense up, which made you look towards him rather than the phone in his hands. His cheeks had taken a pink shade and he had stopped typing. He bit his lip before speaking.
-You know.. the time spent with you.. is... p-precious.. even if the game wasn't what we expected it to be. –He said and looked away in an attempt to hide his flushed cheeks.
-Yeah! I love spending time with you, Levi! –You respond with a smile, clicking 'Post review' on his phone so he doesn't forget. Afterwards you look over at him and see that his ears had turned red which provoked a soft chuckle out of you.
-Yeah me to... Uhm.. actually MC.. eh.. I think I.. I l-love you... No.. actually I know I l-love you...
–Your eyes widen at his confession, your cheeks heating up. Though you quickly spake off the surprise and put on a smile.
-I love you too, Levi... –He stops at his tracks to your words and soon enough turns his head towards you with the pinkiest blush on his cheeks.
-R-really? –He asks and gulps but you nod with a wide smile on your face.
-Yes. Really. –After your statement you wrap your arms around the third-born in a warm hug. As the evening proceeds you and Levi watch an anime, cuddled up together in his bathtub of a bed.
Satan
Since it was exam season the fourth-born was lost in the words of the study books before him. He couldn't settle for anything but the best. And no. He wasn't a perfectionist. He just wanted to outsmart Lucifer. It was his ultimate goal. Though he never achieved it which made him restless. Second to Lucifer? No that couldn't do. And so there he was. Studying in an attempt to surpass his older brother.
One day he had invited you to accompany him to the library to study together and since you had nothing else better to do you accepted with a happy smile on your face. After all you wouldn't say no to spending time with one of your favourite demon brothers. And now there you were. Sitting together in the library, going over the topics of human corruption and seduction over and over again. Though the phrase "human seduction" echoed in Satan's mind and he couldn't get rid of it. He was lost in his thoughts. You had already seduced him and his brothers but the question was whether someone had managed to seduce you. And if someone had.. who was it? Satan could only hope it was him.
Soon enough a tap on the shoulder from you managed to pull him out of his thoughts.
-Satan? Are you okay? –You asked, looking over at the fourth-born with a concerned expression. He shook his head and put on a warm smile as he looked at you.
-Yeah. Everything is okay. I just zoned out for a moment. –He responded and moved his gaze down to the book that was sitting on the table before both of you.
-Okay no problem but could you explain to me this topic right here? I don't really understand it.. –You point at a paragraph in the textbook and he nods his head upon reading the paragraph himself.
-Sure.. hm.. but before I do, MC.. I want to thank you for coming with me today. It means a lot.. –The fourth-born mumbled before running a hand through his hair. You smiled and nodded.
-Of course, Satan. You know I enjoy coming with you to the library to read books together or just study like today. –You say and read over the paragraph you mentioned to Satan one more time.
-Actually, MC.. You've become more important to me than books.. –The demon speaks and puts his hand over yours, trying to get your attention. You turn your head towards him and look at him in confusion.
-I have?
-Yes, MC... –He says in response and looks down at the book in front of him
-Actually what I'm trying to say is that I love you, MC... I've known for a while now but I was trying to find the best fitting time to tell you.. –Satan spoke and looked back at you with a soft, sincere look in his eyes. Your eyes widened and your cheeks reddened at his words. It was the first time Satan said those words. The way they came out of his mouth made you want to hear him say it again, again and again. You swear it made you weak in the knees even if you were sitting on a chair at the moment. Soon enough the smile returned to your face and you turned to the fourth-born who had an anxious look in his face.
-I love you too, Satan.. –You speak and see his expression light up. He quickly pulled you in for a warm hug full of all the pent up love he's held for you. Then he pulled your chair closer, the warmth of his hand around yours grounded him. Finally, he was where he wanted to be—by your side, knowing that it was him who had won your heart. In that moment, nothing else mattered, not even the books before him.
Asmodeus
The fifth-born was feeling very pamperous today. From the moment you woke up Asmodeus was right there with you, showering you with compliments and affection. He took you out shopping for clothes and makeup. The demon of lust showed you each of the new items in the new collection Majolish had released with big enthusiasm. He even bought for you and himself a few matching pieces! Afterwards he took you to a pastry shop to take a few pictures together with some pretty cupcakes the fifth-born had had his eye on for a while.
By the end of the day you were spent. Asmo made sure to take you to every place he desired throughout the whole day. Now you were sitting together in his room, enjoying a glass of demonus and sharing a conversation with one another. It was peaceful. The floral scent of candles could be sensed throughout the room which almost made you feel drowsy. Asmodeus' voice was like a soothing lullaby, which helped you relax after the long day. Soon after the soothing sound of the demon's voice stopped and your eyes popped open. You looked towards him. He was gazing at you with eyes full of love and admiration. It was like he had seen an angel. Upon seeing you open your eyes Asmo smiled and sat closer to you on the bed.
-You are awake? I thought you had fallen asleep, sweetie.–He speaks in that same soft voice he used earlier. The same voice that could make you weak in the knees. And the same voice that was about to lure you into a peaceful slumber.
-I was about to, but you stopped talking. –You responded, putting on a fake pouty expression to which you earned a heartfelt chuckle from the fifth-born.
-Oh so my voice made you feel drowsy? What a compliment, MC! –Asmo smiles and gazes at your face without saying anything.
-You know... You looked really beautiful like that. Your eyes closed, your body relaxed, a soft smile to your face.. i haven't seen such.. angelic beauty since I fell from grace. –He spoke up once again with a gentle tone, looking into your eyes with a sincere expression.
-And as much as I love and appreciate beauty.. recently I've been feeling different. Not about beauty of course. It's not like me to be insecure.. but about you. –He stopped talking after the last sentence and looked down at his hands which were resting on his lap. He fidgets with his fingers, biting his lower lip in an attempt to find the right words he was looking for. You shot him a questioning look before deciding to speak.
-What is that supposed to mean? –You say in a soft voice, looking over at the demon next to you.
-I love you, MC. And it's not the kind of love I have for beauty, or my fans or even random succubi. It's more deep and pure if you know what I mean. –He looks back upon finishing his sentence and your eyes widen. Of course he's said that he loved you before but this time it felt different. It felt real and genuine. Your heart fluttered to the thought and you felt your cheeks heat up. Asmo immediately noticed the colour of your face and let out a subtle chuckle.
-The colour of your cheeks is telling me that you feel the same. Is that right, hun? –He speaks gently and reaches to take your hand on his. His touch is soft and gentle without any unnecessary force. You smile and squeeze his hand.
-It's true. I love you too, Asmo. –You murmur and look over at the demon whose expression looked as bright as day. His smile was wide ans you could swear that his eyes were smiling as well. He pulled you in for a hug and placed a soft to your cheek, forging all of his pent up love into it.
Beelzebub
One evening the sixth-born invited you to dine out with him, to celebrate a recent accomplishment at RAD. The demon's smile shined bright when you agreed. It was always so pure and innocent which made him easy to love. After getting ready you walked towards the entrance where you saw Beel waiting for you. He smiled upon seeing you and offered you a warm greeting. Both of you walked to Hell's kitchen since Beel mentioned that he's been craving hell burgers ever since he woke up that day and couldn't wait any longer to have it. Not to mention that you heard his stomach growl a few times on your way to the restaurant.
Soon enough both of you were sitting on a table at Hell's kitchen, with a bunch of food surrounding you. The amount of it could make you gag just by stealing a glance but the sixth-born didn't seem to mind. Without wasting another second he began devouring the food in front of him while you began eating what was on your own plate. After a while you picked up your glass and took a sip of the demonus, offered by the waitress. Its sweet yet bitter taste flooded your mouth, making it easier to swallow the dry food. Beel on the other hand didn't seem to have problems with finishing his food in just a few minutes without even touching his own demonus though he didn't leave it. Soon after finishing the food he made sure the glass of the alcoholic drink was also empty. After a while you.felt his gaze fall on you. He wasn't staring deep into your soul or anything like that. He was just mindlessly gazing at you as if he was admiring the way you fed yourself to the food before you. You lifted your gaze to meet his and he offered you an innocent smile which you returned before taking another sip of your demonus.
-How was the food? –You question, in an attempt to begin a conversation. The demon looks down at his empty plate and thinks for a few seconds before lifting his head.
-Honestly? I was too hungry to taste it.. I just swallowed it without thinking much.. –He spoke as he fidgeted with his fingers underneath the table. You chuckled at his words before shaking your head.
-You had so much food yet you didn't taste it? Ooohh Beel... –You roll your eyes before taking another bite. The demon didn't respond. Instead he continued looking at you with a thoughtful expression which you couldn't help but be curious about. What could he be possibly thinking around? Was he waiting for you to offer him your food? You might as well. But before you could Beelzebub spoke up.
-You know, MC. I think you've become as important to me as food is.. or even more of I dare to say.. –Your eyes widened softly before turning back to normal. You looked at him with a questioning expression and swallowing the food before speaking.
-More important than food? What do you mean? –You question and leave the fork onto the empty plate, gazing into the eyes of the sixth-born.
-What I mean is that I.. I love you, MC. –He said with a soft voice. You caught a glimpse of pink, color his cheeks before he looked away. You immediately reached and took his hand in yours before responding.
-Aww, Beel.. I love you too.. –You spoke as you caressed his knuckles. He lifted his head, eyes immediately locking onto yours.
-You do? –He asked and you nodded with a soft smile.
-I do. A lot. –He smiled upon your words and squeezed your hand, tight enough for you to feel his love through his grip.
Belphegor
After a long day at RAD the seventh-born had invited you to stargaze together in the attic. So when the night arrived you put on your pyjamas and hurried to the attic, only to see that Belphie was already there waiting for you. He was sitting on the bed with his sleeping attire on, barely keeping his eyes open. You chuckled to the sight and walked over to him. When you poked his cheek his eyes opened gently and he looked at you.
-Oh, MC. You're here.. –He said as he laid onto the soft mattress pulling you along with him. You chuckled and let yourself be pulled by the demon.
After a while both of you were snuggled warmly together, gazing at the stars through the window. The atmosphere was peaceful. There weren't any distractions. Only the faint glow of the stars and the sound of your and his breathings. Belphie gazed at the stars as if he was counting them. You settled your eyes on a few stars which looked beautiful from the angle you saw them and stared at them. Upon pointing them out to the demon he smiled and pulled you closer, telling you that two of those stars were his and Beel's. The moment was precious to both you and him.
After a while you felt the demon move his gaze to yours, gazing at you with soft and sleepy eyes. Next he snuggled closer to you, laying his head on your chest, exhaling contently as he did so.
-You've so comfortable, MC. I love cuddling and watching the stars with you. It's soothing.. –He said in a sleepy manner before closing his eyes, drifting off into a peaceful nap. You caressed his hair, fidgeting with the locks of it. Unexpectedly though the demon mumbled something which you could barely understand.
-I love you, MC... –He whispered and you looked down at his sleeping form in awe. It wasn't rare when the seventh-born would speak in his sleep so you weren't as surprised. What surprised you though were his words. "I love you". You've never heard him say those words to you. Sure, he'd always show you through acts of love or physical touch but words were different. You felt your heart flutter and your cheeks heat up as you caressed your hand over his hair once again.
-I love you too, Belphie. –You whispered in response. You wondered whether to answer him since he would probably wake up to the sound of your voice but it felt essential so you did. Upon hearing your words the demon squeezed you tighter in his sleep which caused a wide smile to appear on your face. It was his way of showing you that he heard your response and how happy it made him feel.
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vminizzle · 11 months ago
Text
Relief
꒰ genre ⤑ suggestive, FLUFF
꒰ warnings ⤑ dry humping, (cum in pants), that’s all 🚶🏽‍♀️
꒰ words count ⤑ 0.6k
꒰ A/N ⤑ hi hi hi everyone, well I'm back again I guess. I really wanna apologize for my inactivity. Here's a very little drabble like promised. It's really nothing but, perhaps a proof of me still being alive here? lmao. So, thank you for waiting for me. I'm still working on SL pt.3., I know I'm taking so much time. sorry sorry, I guess I'm more lazy than I thought ahah. Unfortunately for the people waiting, I'll release the third part next year only. Please stay patient. Reminder : English is not my first language. And... I'm a feedback craver, please don't be shy and leave a lil comment please, you know I love it! xoxo - sunny
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M RATED?
Jungkook came home exhausted from work as he found you in bed, wearing just one of his oversized shirt and a pair of panties.
“hey! you’re home.” you said sweetly as you started to sit up a smile plastered on your lips, but he shook his head gesturing you to stay still before crawling into bed hovering on top of you.
Laying down on your chest, his face pressed into the crook of your warm neck, he just sighed as he shifted against your panties.
You curled one of your legs over his thin waist, closing your eyes enjoying the friction of the rough material of his pants against your thin panties.
Jungkook ruted forward against you with a low moan passing by his lips. His cold hands sliding up under your shirt, feeling your warm skin, making you shivered as his long digits caressed your sides.
He didn’t pull his face from your throat as he continued humping against you, going faster and faster until he finally still his hips, pressed tightly to yours, a soft moan escaping his mouth.
You stroked over the back of his head, sliding your fingers into his soft black locks.
“was it good, babe?” Jungkook slid off to his side, a tired smile decorating his pretty lips.
“thank you my love.” he said softly.
You threw your right leg over on his waist, and kissed his cheek.
“bad day?” you asked turning on your side to stare at him.
“I had too much work. So many things to deal with today.” he sighed heavily closing his eyes.
“Wanna talk about it? I’m all ears.” you said softly playing with the buttons of his shirt.
“Tomorrow.” he replied grabbing your hand gently in his.
“don’t wanna shower before sleeping?”
You sat a little looking down at him waiting for an answer.
“’m too tired to move.” he chuckled eyes still closed.
You stared at him and sat cross-legged this time.
“You want me to help you?”
He opened his eyes, standing himself up on his elbows.
“What did I do to deserve you?” he smiled, his dimples on full display making your heart melt at how cute he was.
“It’s okay darling, I’m fine don’t worry.” he reassured you.
“But you just c-“
“want to help me, huh?”
“Yes of course.” you replied immediately.
“ok then.” he laid down on his back again.
“Cuddle with me.” he said grabbing your arm pulling you so you’re on top of him.
“You’re so-“ you started before he cut you off.
“in love with you?” he said smirking making you close your eyes hiding your face into the crook of his neck, smiling at his words.
He laughed softly at your reaction.
“I love you.” he said one hand stroking your lower back, the other hand, fingers tangled in your hair.
“I love you ‘koo.” you whispered against his neck, peppering soft little kisses on the smooth skin.
He took your face in his hands and kissed your lips, taking his sweet time to enjoy the softness of them. It was a lazy kiss but it was full of love. He smiled at you lovingly as he parted away.
“I promise to make it up to you tomorrow.” he muttered feeling guilty about not making you come earlier.
“it’s fine.” you chucked shaking your head.
“Good night.” you kissed him one last time, before laying your head down on his muscular chest again, his strong cologne invading your nose.
“Good night my love.” He laid a gently peck on your forehead, holding you tightly in his strong arms.
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becauseicantthinkwritings · 6 months ago
Text
Objects in Motion
Part 2
Alpha!Billy Russo x Omega! Reader
Part 1 here
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You’re deep in sleep when a loud bang wakes you.
Bolting up with a gasp, your heart pounds in your chest for a few minutes. You’re not sure what the noise was- a door slamming shut, or maybe something falling in the apartment above you, but the echo of it in your head keeps you awake for a while, hating that your anxiety doesn’t let you sleep.
.
You go to another dry cleaners, you do your best to avoid going out. You go to work, and back home for a couple of weeks, worried that someone will find you and scold you for what you’ve done.
You think about being scolded by him, you doubt you’d be able to last a moment in his presence.
After you’d ensured the safe delivery of the coat, did you finally research the owner.
William Russo, his stoic, borderline angry expression staring back at you through your computer screen had only made you aroused all over again.
This, this was the Alpha with a scent so magnetic, you couldn’t resist it.
He was rich, a CEO, and you could only look around your threadbare apartment and sigh sadly, there was nothing you could offer him that would interest him.
So, you try to move on with your life, work hard so you can afford to buy alleviators for your next heat, and stay away from alphas that would no doubt hurt you.
The art museum was a big comfort. On a Friday evening, when it was at its emptiest, you’d go in, and stare at all the paintings. You’d study the brushstrokes till your eyes burned, items like Starry Night, and Street Light were beautiful works that always made you dare to dream of a life better than the one you were in. Today however, The Lovers was the one that kept you most occupied.
Two people, with white cloths over their heads as they lean into each other, kissing.  Hidden from each other’s sight, you wonder if the painting only holds its romance because of the seemingly anonymity of the subjects. If the mystery was removed, would there be more love, or less?
It was kind of how you felt right now, pained, searching for something that you weren’t familiar with. An alpha, to call your own.
None of the alphas you’d met had ever been right for you. There was an entitlement written into them, the belief that your station was lesser, so you were supposed to submit. Alphas constantly lived with that air of superiority surrounding them, and they were easily upset when you did not give them what they wanted. 
The alphas you dated were wrong to think that submission was something freely given, in reality, it had to be earned.
You wondered if the alpha on your mind would ask nicely.
Probably not. It was a good thing he existed only in your fantasies.
.
Your omega privilege means you get to stay a little after closing. You smile gratefully in the security guard’s direction when he comes to escort you out.
“We’ve got a new piece coming in tomorrow. You won’t be able to stay late anymore, but I’m sure you’ll like it.”
You smile in delight.
“Do you know which one it is?” You ask.
“Not really, not much of an art guy, but it’s a big deal, really expensive.”
You nod, enthusiastically.
“Well, I can’t wait.” You reply, wishing the beta a good night when you finally reach the exit, pulling your jacket tighter around you to protect from the cold.
.
Not for the first time in his life, he feels the loneliness. 
It’s only that he’s never felt it quite like this. Usually, people just didn’t want him, his mother gave him up when he was a baby, and he’d never really understood why. Through his life, people had assumed he’d present as a beta, because he’d been a scrawny kid. Things had only gotten worse when at ten, his alpha denomination had shown through.
Then, everyone had wanted a piece of him, an opportunity to say that they’d fought an alpha and won, uncaring of his age and size- the world had forced him to become ruthless very quickly.
He’d let the world’s rejection shape him, and he’d only realised that when he’d met Frank.
Frank had made him understand, that alphas were not supposed to be cruel, but rather the very definition of safety and security.
He'd tried his best to ignore the hollow feeling inside of him, and that had worked.
At least, it had, up until he'd smelled that stupid coat.
Now, it was like someone had taken a piece of him and ran off with it, ripped a carefully placed bandage off and left him with an open wound. He could feel the absence, like if it was a whole other person in the room.
He wanted his omega.
It was all he’d thought about now, as he pressed the coat to his nose every night, struggling to catch her fading scent, he wondered if he’d ever be able to sleep again when the scent fully faded.
He keeps going, maybe he even pushes himself harder, his work distracts him, helps him keep a clear head.
He’d even accepted a job to secure artwork for the museum, even though his specialty was protecting people, and Frank was usually the man that handled asset protection.
He’s following closely behind The Scream when he stops dead in his tracks.
One of his employees tosses him a confused glance, but he ignores it as he takes a deep inhale. 
He’d know that vanilla scent anywhere, the smell of apples mixed in and his heart gives an eager kick.
Surely not-
He turns his head, sees a painting of two lovers hiding from each other, kissing through a shroud of white cloth. He studies it for a moment, his mind racing at speeds he can’t fathom.
When the painting gets too far ahead, he turns and resumes his stride, thinking about all the ways he can do his best to get what he wants.
.
He gets permission to access the security footage of the museum.
Who’s really going to deny an alpha anyway?
Billy finds her, or at least the back of her head, and he can’t help the excitement that after weeks of searching, he’s managed to get lucky and obtain a lead on her.
He talks to the security guard that walked her out. With a sleepy voice over the phone, the man tells him that she’s a frequent visitor to the museum on Fridays, and she doesn’t cause any trouble so he lets her stay a little after closing.
“She just likes looking at the pieces, and I can’t be mean to an omega as shy as her.”
Billy’s mouth twitches upward, amused at the biological imprint inside everyone to protect omegas. The men who’d done her a favour to deliver his coat had said near the same thing.
It had made him fond, of a sweet girl, that would no doubt be spooked if he showed up at her home unannounced. Even if he now had the means to trace her back to her home, he couldn’t take the risk. He had to play this right.
.
When you hear Edvard Munch’s The Scream is on display, you vibrate with excitement. Instead of going the opening week, you wait till your usual time the next Friday, when hopefully there’s much less of a crowd to contend with.
It’s not completely empty, but you’re okay with the sparse crowd, you smile, tiptoeing to peek over shoulders so that you can catch a sight of it before you’re at the front.
You love everything about it, the colour and the expressionism of it, you wonder how much the paint has faded over time. The little paragraph beside the painting describes an infinite scream, a universal anxiety, and you think you can almost feel that as you stare at it, the idea that you’re being watched sending a nervous thrill down your spine.
When you move away from the painting however, the feeling lingers. You take a deep breath, closing your eyes to shake the feeling, you don’t understand how a painting can have such an effect.
To clear your head, you find an impressionist nearby, Monet’s reflections of clouds on a lily pond, and you stand in front of it, letting out a long sigh.
When the distinct smell of bergamot hits you, you stiffen. 
Your heart squeezes into your throat, and you try to look around as casually as possible, betas turn to look at you as they scent your distress in the air. 
Did you feel like you were being watched- because you were actually being watched?
You take in another breath, and this time, you’re sure.
Cracked pepper, citrus- 
The alpha was here.
Someone says your name behind you, and you turn in fright.
There he was. Dressed down in casual clothes, trying to blend in with the people around him- as if an alpha as handsome as him ever could.
Billy Russo was devastatingly gorgeous up close.
But you were fucked.
Your eyes widen and you take a step back, knowing that this was definitely about stealing his coat. He would no doubt try to make you pay for cleaning- or worse yet- a new coat entirely.
Your body flushes with fear as you back away from him on shaky legs.
His head tilts as he watches you go, dark eyes caught on your retreating form.
“Don’t run, omega.” He says easily, taking a single stride as you back away, his presence looming over you, igniting something in your stomach like a match being struck.
You make a small sound in the back of your throat, and you do exactly what he says not to.
You run.
Well, not exactly.
More like a quick walk, looking back to see if he follows, you beeline for the bathroom, hoping to hide in there for a moment.
You groan, splashing your face with water, internally grumbling over what you've gotten yourself into.
You should have never grabbed that stupid coat with your stupid omega senses always searching for the right alpha. What did you think? That just because he’d had an amazing scent meant that he wanted to take care of you? 
No, he was probably going to scold you, and force you to pay him back, and you couldn’t afford three thousand for a coat. 
Your throat tightens in panic, your body flushes with fear.
You couldn’t think too much on what he would do if he caught you, all you needed to focus on right now, was getting away.
So you take a deep breath and you shed your jacket, tucking it under your arm and stepping out of the bathroom behind someone. 
There’s not a lot of people, but luckily you know the museum, and you take the most secluded paths that you doubt anyone unfamiliar to the museum would know of.
You sigh happily when you see the exit door in sight, making large meaningful steps, looking back every now and then. Behind you is empty, and you think that you might have actually lost him.
It sends a pang of sadness through you, but you shake your head to shove it away.
You look back once more when you push your way through the exit doors, making sure the path behind you is clear of any six foot alphas.
And you walk right into him.
You’re not sure it is at first, but his size and smell give it away. Your face is pressed securely to his chest, and his hands come up to grip your upper arms firmly.
You raise your head in panic, trying to wrench back from him.
“Relax omega, you’re not in any trouble, I promise.” He says, something in his voice that makes his words sound believable.
You whine in distress.
“Please, I’m sorry, I can’t afford to replace your coat. I shouldn’t have taken it.” You plead, voice wobbling with the struggle to speak under duress.
“Shh, little one, I’m not here to ask you for money.”
His words don’t register in your head, and you begin to cry. Thick swells of tears fall from the corners of your eyes.
“I can’t pay.” You struggle out in a tiny voice.
He grunts, his hands move to cup your face, your tears spilling onto his fingers instead.
“Omega.” He says meaningfully.
The command in his tone makes you look up at him, brain going quiet, the power of his voice catching your attention easily. His stern expression softens.
“I’m not here to make you pay for anything, and I promise you’re not in any trouble.”
You make a little sniffle.
“ ‘M not?” You ask weakly.
The corner of his mouth curves up.
“No, I just want to talk.” 
“Talk?” You repeat dumbly.
His thumbs trace over your cheekbones gently, a soft tingling sensation swims in your head and settles at the top of your spine. Your eyelids flutter as you watch him nod.
“I’ve been searching for you for weeks, omega, since you left me that coat drenched in your sweet scent, I haven’t had a clear thought since.”
You gulp.
“I’m sorry.” You whisper.
“Don’t be sorry just-” He squeezes his eyes shut as if he’s looking for the right words, “Have dinner with me. Tonight. My treat.”
You take a deep breath, eyes widening.
“I’m not sure it’s such a good idea.”
He lets out a swift breath, you worry that you might be aggravating him.
“What aren’t you sure about? Your safety?”
You feel your heart pick up its pace beneath your ribcage, tormenting your body with the feeling of panic.
You reach up, cupping his hands in yours and peeling them off your cheeks. 
“Alphas are… notorious for getting angry when they don’t get their way.” You reply anxiously, your hands uncurling from his, filled with so much trepidation. 
“I understand, but give me a chance to prove myself. There’s something between us, omega, you just have to open yourself up to it.”
You blink, stomach flipping as you debate your options.
You eye him warily, too afraid to say no, too scared of how he would react.
You take another step back, and his face looks pained, his body tense.
You shake your head, scared, taking another cautious step away.
“Please don’t run.” He says softly, it makes you pause.
Maybe… maybe a chance wouldn’t be so bad.
“What about lunch tomorrow?” Somewhere bright and public that would make you feel safer about being around him.
He lets out a slow breath.
“Lunch is great. Where?”
You think for a moment.
“We can meet right here, there’s a place not far from here with nice sandwiches.”
He inclines his head.
“Sandwiches are great.”
You give him a soft smile of amusement, still a little unsure.
“Okay, we’ll meet here tomorrow? Around 12?”
He nods, digging into his pockets for a moment before pulling a card out and extending it to you.
You blink, a little cautious, reaching for the obsidian coloured paper in his hand. You study the raised silver lettering, his name, his job title, his company.
“The one on the left is my cell. Let me know when you get here. If you want, we can look around the museum too.”
Something flips in your chest at the thought. You wonder what he thought of The Scream.
“No,” You mumble, shaking your head, “The museum is packed on a Saturday. I hate crowds.”
He nods in understanding.
“No crowds then, maybe we can take a walk in the park.”
“Maybe.” You reply, still a little unsure of this entire scenario.
“You're safe, Omega, I promise.”
You offer a sad smile.
“That's what they all say.”
.
He was going to kill every Alpha that had ever made you feel unsafe.
He sits in his car, after you'd denied his offer to at least take you home. 
Your scent fades where he'd touched you, his body demanding more. Apples, so fucking sweet his mouth waters. 
Halfway to his home, a text comes in from you, shyly informing him that you'd made it home.
He'd asked, wanted to make sure that you were safe as the late evening had turned to night.
He keeps it simple, types out a small message to put you at ease.
Thank you. Sweet dreams
.
.
.
A/N: Pretty sure y'all are gonna hate this. Sorry.
Also, just asking for more without leaving any kind of feedback makes me feel kinda used 😅
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hoeforhao · 1 year ago
Text
🏷 Kidult ▪︎ Choi Seungcheol Fic ▪︎
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↷ pairing: dad!seungcheol × fem!reader (feat!jeonghan)
↷ genre: heavy angst, fluff towards the end, mentions of childhood trauma, sort of arranged marriage? cheol and reader have a daughter together, lots of dad seungcheol content!!!
↷ summary: can trying to relive the childhood you never got to experience, through your daughter be the reason of your husband's irk?
↷ part: 1/4 pt.2, pt.3, pt.4
↷ w.c: 2.5k
↷ author's note: part 1 is here finally!! will try to post part 2 by the end of this week, and part 3 will be a bonus smut which will be published on cheol's birthday♡
If you want to be added to this fic's taglist, drop a comment under this post ; my ask box is open too♡
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Motherhood was truly a blissful chapter of every woman's life. Seeing your child growing up in your arms, her little legs stomping through the grass to join her playmates, often tumbling down on her way, her father going completely nuts over the itty bitty scratches on his princess,made you feel a joy not even billion dollars could buy.
But that's definitely not something you believed in before getting married to seungcheol or even when you announced to all of your family, that you were about to birth a small little version of your husband and their son.
While his child swelled in your belly, his ignorance and indifference towards you, swelled in your heart. Although it would be downright selfish to say that seungcheol didn't take care of you during your pregnancy, but you surely weren't that naive to not understand it was all for the wellbeing of his daughter.
Well some people unlike others are just destined to go through life like a soldier, bound to only their duty without the luxury of enjoying worldly pleasures - that's what you've been telling yourself since your childhood, all throughout your marriage but now...now it's different.
As selfish as it may sound, your daughter Hana's childhood now gave you a newfound hope of reliving those years of your life that you never got to cherish....being as carefree and jolly like a two year old, sleeping every night with a teddy tucked under your arms without any thoughts about how to deal with this cruel world.
You were so consumed in your thoughts that you failed to notice the cinnamon pie set in the oven being slightly overcooked along its edges.
"Shit shit shit you cannot mess this up y/n!!! Cheol and Hana are crazy over your cinnamon pie and the last thing you wanna do is disappoint your daughter and his father" you mentally cuss at yourself while taking out the pie pot from the oven as quick as possible....mildly burning your fingers in the attempt.
A thud of the main door shitts your concentration from your burned fingers to your hall, which is now being adorned by Hana's giggles upon seeing her father.
"Dada is home princess! What has my girl been doing all day without her daddy huh" seungcheol literally throws his coat on the couch before hopping towards his beloved daughter, taking her up in his arms in one quick lift and peppering the little ball's mochi cheeks with kisses.
"I played a lot with momma today daddy, and you know you know we even threw a birthday party for Bella hehe" Hana started blabbering out her entire day's routine to her father, sitting on his lap, her head resting on his chest,as seungcheol kept on playing with his daughter's silken locks.
"That's why my cupcake is all dolled up right now huh, I see" seungcheol's arms wrap around Hana's waist tightly while patting her hair. "Do I look like a princess dwaddy?"
"When does my Hana doesn't look like a princess, baby! You're royalty, my little highness" you were watching such a dreamy cinematic sequence of a perfect loving family being played out infront of you, from behind the kitchen counter....the catch being you were just a part of this trio only for a show to others.
"Daddy daddy can we go to the park tomorrow pwease" your daughter surely knew that her puppy eyes was cheol's biggest weakness and that's what she used everytime to make her father tend to all the tantrums.
"Anything for my babygirl. But first you've to stop looking at me with those eyes or dadda's heart will burst from cuteness babie" hana's adorable beads were now paired with her dad's dimples making your heart swell at the view. Two of your cutest dumplings.
"Come on now enough talking you two! Who wants to have the first bite of the pie?" you break off your glare from the duo and bring out the piping hot plate of freshly baked crust from the kitchen and set it on the table before them.
"Me me me" "No me" "No daddy me. Won't you let your princess have the first bite" one pout from Hana and seungcheol melts into a puddle, stuffing her small cheeks with the first bite of the pie by himself. "Next time dadda will win for sure!!!" a small hmph leaves your 27 year old husband's lips.
"So when are we going out tomorrow?" you press your lips into a smile like an excited puppy, putting a halt to the father daughter's playtime...your eyes glistening up at the thought of the beautiful day ahead.
"We'll leave after breakfast" seungcheol's stern voice echoes around the hall, awaring you of the void of emotions he has dug out only for you, his wife and the mother of his child.
"Oh okay! Come on Hana it's bedtime bub." you swing her up into your arms, marking your steps towards her bedroom. "No mowmmy I wanna play more with daddy please"
"No baby. We gotta wake up early tomorrow for the park right? There you can play with dad all throughout the day. Okay love?" you plant a goodnight kiss to your daughter's temples before tucking her into her soft Cinderella sheets.
"My cute round munchkin" one last loving glance at Hana and you put off the lights of her room to let her drift into the happiest dream ever, without any tension of the cruelties of the outside world.
Changing into a soft satin robe and tying your hair up into a bun, you finally settle yourself under the duvet of your shared bedroom with seungcheol, your back facing him, wishing ever passing moment, that at least once he wraps you around his arms. But you know better, that he never will.
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ・・・・☆・・・・
"YAH CHOI HANA WALK SLOW!" screaming at
that poodle of sunshine waddling away in utter haste, you try to match her pace, literally all breathless and panting.
After a fruitless attempt to follow your spawn of Satan going absolutely haywire about being in a park with her daddy, you curve up your back, sweating like a pig looking for some air ; a pair of cold petite hands lands on the crook of your neck.
"Who the fuc - oh my god Mr notepad ass what are you doing here!!" your face instantly harbors the biggest smile upon seeing your childhood bestfriend after literally months.
"Come on girl, you meet the heartthrob of the town, and this is how you greet him? Girls swoon over m - ah ouch y/n lord my future gen " hearing jeonghan blabber 'bout being a hot cake was downright torture for you, when the man literally had no cake to offer!!!
"Yeah yeah sure that's why you used to ask me to find you a girl, pheww!!" a big smug visible clear in your eyes.
"sigh Is this how you welcome your bestfriend after almost an year??!!" han knew that him giving you those angel eyes will make your composure melt in a matter of seconds and that's exactly what happened.
"Oh come on! I was joking! You know I love you, you little bunny" you instantly wrap your arms around han's waist tightly, while pouting like a puppy yourself, as he returns the gesture in a blink.
"Except the cake part tho, hehe!" a slight pinch lands on his butt as you free yourself from him to walk to the ride's counter, hand in hand. Your heart was fluttering like a flock of doves, because you could let your true self take control only when with jeonghan, from laughing like a five year old, being a naughty tease to smiling wide like the sun. Why so? Because apparently seeing you letting your inner child out in the open, irked your 'husband'.
"Oh the main question! Why are you here? That too at a theme park!!!" shooting an interrogative glare towards jeonghan you march away through the crowd like a happy squirrel.
"I'm here with Nabi, and my little bunbun Byul. She literally manipulated me into taking her to this park. ME! THE YOON JEONGHAN BEING MANIPULATED. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT! I guess she learnt it from her dad only" jeonghan blurted out almost an entire verse within seconds, and you felt nothing but sheer joy being reunited with the only who who cherished your presence, after so long.
"There they are" you look over the thick mass to see Seungcheol and Hana standing by the ride, her little pinky entwined with her father's dainty yet strong digits, while pulling onto jeonghan's arms to run towards your family.
Cheol's face turns slightly dark watching you beaming with joy being arm tied with another man, that was not him. He knew jeonghan was your bestfriend from the time your wedding bells rang but....there was this feeling in his heart against Han, that he could never justify.
"Hey Seungcheol. How you've been? Grown quite buff huh!" Jeonghan playfully slaps Cheol's muscles, earning a sort of irritated groan and a tight smile from him.
"Looks like someone's jealous!" you lean your body over jeonghan's shoulder, whispering into his ears which lands you into being tickled by him like crazy, in public.
"Okay okay I'm sorry, s-stop!" Han's devilish hands finally leaves your body, as yout chest heaves up and down, breathless from laughing an entire year's worth.
"Umm hmm" cheol clears his throat as he tries to break off the *not so desirable scene rolling out infront of him* "we should get Hana going on the ride now, she's growing quite impatient"
"Omg yes so sorry baby mom got distracted" you take Hana from her father's grip. "Cheol cheol let us get on the ride too na? Pls!!! Pls!!" pulling onto your husband's biceps, being in a trance of happiness and forgetting that he's Choi Seungcheol and not your buddy, Jeonghan -
"Stop behaving like a kid y/n! You're twenty seven and a mother to a two year old! Fuckin act like one" each and every word that left cheol's lips carved out a new wound in your heart. Though he's right anyways....you don't deserve to fool around like a happy child....you never did....
"I'll call Nabi and Byul too. Both of them can enjoy their visit that way then" jeonghan steps in to somewhat chase away the cloud that was near to pouring down over the four of you "and Byul is herself quite fond of her bestfriend Hana anyways. They would love this set up" Han's lips curl up into a forced smile as he walks off to fetch his own family.
"I i'm sorry" you let go off Hana's tiny fingers, as soon as jeonghan leaves,leading her to the ride's entrance. "Hold on tightly to the bars, okay? Mom will be right here" your soft sweaty hands cup her cheeks before she turns around to go get seated on her most awaited part of the day.
Seungcheol's face is painted with guilt and regret, as he watches over his small family - while her daughter is glaring brighter than the sun with soulful joy, his wife is standing all gloomy beside the long sheep haired guy he have always envied.
"Mommy the ride was amazing. You know Byul was scared hehe. She was holding onto my arms" your daughter waddles down the metal stairs, her bestfriend following soon after, both of their faces all sweaty and glinting from the little adventure.
"N-no i was not, i i just tried to k-keep Hana safe" the two year old blurts out, trying to protect her pride, while her dad scoops her up into his arms, drying off her face with his shirt.
"Yes you're my strong and brave bun, I know that baby" jeonghan places open mouth kisses on his daughter's face, shifting her to her mother's arms gently, placing a gentle kiss on his wife's forehead in the process.
Such a beautiful family. A word that would never fit your own -
"I - I'm taking the girls to have some ice cream" seungcheol breaks the silence that has now creeped up onto your face. "Wanna j-join us, y/n?" no matter how much he tries to act cool or indifferent, the words he threw at your merry face just few minutes back, refuses to leave his mind, engulfing his form in severe shame and agony.
"No I would like to stay back. You three go ahead" the change in your tone was clear enough for even a stranger to notice....and jeonghan has known you for twenty whole years.
"Nabi you accompany the girls and seungcheol. We two will be waiting for y'all by the carousel" surprising right? How jeonghan was the one having your back and not your husband!!!
"Seungcheol was being an absolute dick back there you know. A very annoying, lumpy and dumbass dick " han's hands curl up against your shoulder as he pulls your head to rest on his nape, while both of you were seated on a bench shining under the dreamiest luminaire.
"Hmm" you hum into his skin, warm salty drops slowly making their way down his silk shirt "or maybe he was actually right"
Pulling yourself up from Han's embrace, you focus your eyes onto your lap, while fidgeting with your fingers, when you feel a warm pair of hands cupping your cheek, fingers pushing off any drop of water that dared to pass by your supple skin.
"Just because someone doesn't appreciate your presence in their life and treat you as nothing but a person their daughter calls 'mom', doesn't mean that you are allowed to downgrade yourself" his hands traveling down your face to now engulf your palms into his, "You have every right to be yourself y/n. I know how you've been fighting all your life, how you never had anything what people call carefree childhood these days....don't let anyone murder the soulful kid within you. Understood, Ms Thumper Paws" jeonghan settles his speech with a finishing pinch on your dumpling cheeks.
"Aye aye sir! Noted!!" you finally flash him with the smile he has been trying to bring out since 'someone' decided to slash it.
To both of your oblivion, seungcheol was watching his wife, his partner being all giggly like a beaming ray of sunshine, her bunny teeth making its way out for the world to see, but-
not in his arms, not on his jokes, instead because of her bestfriend....the person he has always been jealous of, for making you smile so wide and bringing out the adorable kid in you!!!something only he wishes to do you for you.....
all this while the caramel ice cream he brought for you melting away in his hands, as he takes in the sight before him with gritted teeth and hurt eyes
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killerlookz · 5 months ago
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She Makes Dirty Words Sound Pretty: Pt. II | Joost Klein
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Description: Joost Klein x f! reader (part two to this fic here) Joost returns home from tour, and he and reader finally get to rekindle their relationship with some much-needed make up sex.
Content: 18+ nsfw, mdni- rpf smut, oral (f! recieving), fingering, unprotected PiV, allusions to past angst/relationship issues but mostly just comfort/fluff
Word count: 4,379
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Your eyes flutter as a soft touch against your cheek pulls awake you from your unconscious state. Heavy eyelids prying themselves open, fighting against the weight of sleep. Your bedroom is drenched in moonlight, providing just enough clarity to identify the figure that stands above you.
"Joost?" Your straining voice thick with sleep as your eyebrows furrow, confused, but you'd be lying if you said a smile wasn't tugging at the corners of your lips.
"Oh," He responds, lips just above your forehead, "Schatje, I didn't mean to wake you." His voice soft and apologetic.
"No," You mumble, heart pumping, far too ecstatic for your exhausted state, "You're home?" You outstretch a lazy arm, reaching for the lamp on your bedside table so you can actually see the man you're talking to. With a click, the room is enveloped in a soft orange glow. Your eyelids snap shut at the initial brightness, too harsh for your eyes, sensitive from sleep.
Last you heard, Joost wasn't supposed to be home from tour until tomorrow evening. Not that you could complain about his early appearance, it had been a hard few weeks without him.
You stare at the man above you, his glasses hanging down his nose, exposing his eyes, the pale skin surrounding them seeming darker than usual with hints of purple, his hair, messy. He looked exhausted, you figured it had been a while since he had gotten a good night's sleep.
"I was able to get an earlier flight." A small smile appears on his lips as he slowly stands up from the position where he hovers over you.
"Didn't tell me." You pout
"I didn't want you waiting up for me." His head falls to the side, apologetically.
"No? Just going to hover over me in the dark at-whatever time in the morning it is."
Joost shakes his head, chuckling,
"You make it sound so creepy."
"It is a little creepy," You giggle, "Waking up to some guy hanging above my face."
"Just giving you a kiss goodnight."
"Then why don't you come to bed?" You ask, patting the empty space next to you.
It was then that you had realized perhaps subconsciously you had been leaving room for Joost in bed every night. It had been over a month since you had last shared a bed, and yet still you had continued to sleep on "your" side of the bed, not allowing yourself to sprawl out.
"A few minutes, okay?"
You nod, your head falling to the side, still sleepy.
You manage to keep your eyes open, however, as you watch Joost walk away from you. You track his movements with your eyes, your gaze not leaving his body as he walks about the room.
There had been a lingering tension in the room, one that lightly dulled your excitement of having Joost home. Many words had been left unsaid between the two of you, having thought it better to push aside discussing those tumultuous first few weeks he had been away until Joost had gotten home. Neither of you wanted to deal with emotions getting lost or misunderstood over the phone anymore, both you and Joost wanted to fix your relationship, not continue the cycle of arguments you had unfortunately fallen into.
Still, things had been amicable between you, being able to hold conversations like normal- but, that gnawing feeling of obvious feelings having been unspoken did not cease.
Despite the tension, your heart still flutters as you watch Joost undress on the other side of the bedroom, stripping down to only his boxers. A smile grazes his lips as he looks up at you, catching you staring at him. You smile back, unashamed of how hard you had been looking.
"Be right there," The grin lingers on his face as he goes to toss his clothes into the closet. You take this moment to turn off the lamp beside you, the room once again now only lit by moonlight.
Moments later he's walking back toward the bed, the mattress dipping as he climbs in next to you.
Immediately, the two of you are meeting in the middle of the bed, wrapping a leg around his as you pull yourself near him, his arm snaking around your waist. You close your eyes as your lips meet his in a gentle kiss, so soft yet still filled with so many emotions. Joost grips you tighter, holding you firmly against his,
"I missed you," He mumbles, pulling away only slightly, his lips still ghosting yours as he speaks.
"I missed you too." It wasn't solely a physical missing him, but missing the Joost before tour, the Joost before the arguments and nights ridden with anger and spite. But as you lay in each other's arms, it feels as if you already have that Joost back, the Joost that wouldn't ever dare to hurt your feelings, not even in the slightest, "I'm glad you're home."
It felt ridiculous even saying having that Joost back, he had never left, and deep down you knew it, under no circumstances would either of you truly intentionally hurt each other.
You feel Joost's chest rising against yours before he lets out a large exhale.
"Mmm," He hums, nuzzling his face into your cheek, "Ik ben zo blij om thuis te zijn." (I'm so glad to be home), A small kiss is placed against your jaw before Joost speaks again, his words becoming slower, "Met mijn lieve meisje" (With my sweet girl)
"You're exhausted." You giggle, Joost had a habit of mixing up languages once he got to a certain point of tired, often speaking in some combination of English and Dutch, but it seemed now he had forgotten English entirely, "Prober wat te slapen." (try to get some sleep),
"Ahh," Joost's breath tickles your neck as he exhales, "You should speak Dutch more, zo mooi klinkt." (sounds so pretty)
You can't help but feel a little bad, your usage of Dutch in day-to-day life hadn't exactly been nearly as much as it should have been for someone with a Dutch boyfriend, living in the Netherlands. Despite the length the two of you had been together, and how long you had been living here you had yet to feel confident enough to use it so often.
You simply hum in response, unsure of what to say as you snuggle up closer to Joost, burying your head in his neck, and wrapping an arm around his torso. You had missed this closeness, realizing just how much you craved his touch as Joost's arm snakes up under the T-shirt you had been wearing, feeling his palm grip your now-exposed skin.
"Hold on," You mumble, sneaking out of Joost's grip, grabbing at the bottom of your shirt, pulling it over your head. You toss the fabric somewhere in the room, leaving both of you clad only in your underwear.
The two of you were long past the point in your relationship of there being any shame or shyness around nudity. There was nothing inherently sexual about your decision to further undress, rather the move was done solely due to your desire for skin-to-skin contact with Joost.
As you go to lay back down, Joost turns on his side, pressing his chest to your now bare back. His skin is soft, the warmth of his body heat exuding a familiar warmth as he presses his face into your neck. He wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you close to him.
"Slaap lekker, ik hou van jou." (Sleep tight, I love you.) Joost mumbles into your ear, and you can tell sleep is quickly overtaking him.
"Ik hou ook van jou." (I love you too.)
You wake up with a low groan, immediately noticing the sharp pain in your neck as you attempt to change your position.
"Ugh," You moan at the sensation, eyes fluttering open.
"Hmm?" You hear a hum from next to you, remembering that Joost had come home last night.
Inhaling deeply you turn your whole body to the side, wincing at the way your neck aches with your movements.
Your boyfriend lies next to you, awake, but his eyelids are still heavy as he looks at you. You forget the pain you're in for just a moment as you admire his peaceful state, his face illuminated by the soft orange glow of sunlight.
"What's wrong?" He asks, voice thick with sleep.
"Slept weird." You furrow your eyebrows, "My neck really hurts."
"Mijn arme meisje," (My poor girl) He pouts, "C'mon," He stretches a hand to your waist, "Roll over, maybe a massage will help."
Wordlessly, you comply, rolling onto your stomach, trying to adjust yourself comfortably against the pillows, tilting your head to the side so as to not suffocate yourself.
The bed dips as Joost moves from his position, a hand grazing your thigh, motioning you to pull your legs apart so he can sit between them.
You can feel Joost hovering above you as he kneels between your legs, his presence is a comforting one.
"Good morning," He mumbles, leaning forward, pressing a kiss to your exposed shoulder blade.
"Morning." You respond, silently hoping for him to kiss you more. But soon enough his thumbs press against the back of your neck, the rest of your fingers just barely resting against your throat as he softly massages the spot where you're sore.
A small gasp leaves your mouth at the sensation, your eyes forcing themselves shut.
"That feel okay?" Joost asks, a tinge of concern in his voice.
"Perfect." You sigh, letting yourself enjoy his touch.
He continues for a little while longer, gentle moans leaving your mouth as he soothes your pain with the palms of his hand. After a few minutes of silence, Joost speaks again,
"Are things okay- between us? You've been short with me since I got back."
"Oh," You exhale, "-M'just tired." It's only partially the truth, you know you can't skirt around having to discuss the issues the pair of you had had at the beginning of tour for much longer, but you're hoping to divert the conversation for just a little bit more so you can revel in this moment, "We can talk about everything later. Let's just enjoy our morning"
"Okay," Joost's voice barely above a whisper, "Want me to go lower?" His hands trailing down to your shoulders.
"Mhm," You hum.
Joost kneads into the skin of your shoulders, eliciting more moans and sighs from you. His touch is just firm enough to be effective, yet still gentle, romantic.
He continues massaging down your back as you're enveloped in a comfortable silence. All tension seems to be erased from your body as Joost works his hands against you. There's no stress, no worries, only him and his reassuring touch.
Joost finds himself sliding his hands down your hips and to your thighs. He grips each thigh with one hand, his fingers pressing into the supple flesh. A familiar tightness creeps between your legs as you realize where he has positioned himself, and how close to your inner thighs his thumbs are.
You sigh as your back arches into his touch, forcing his hands a little further up your thighs. Joost continues his movements, his fingers inching closer, and closer to the inside of your legs.
"Like that?" He asks, his voice making it evident he already knows the answer.
"Yes." Is just about all you can manage out.
Joost swipes a thumb across the crotch of your panties, shivers running down your spine as he does so.
"How about if I touch you here?" He presses his thumb right above your clothed entrance, "Would you like that?"
"Please," You strain, your inner thighs pulsing with a growing arousal.
Joost's thumb ghosts over the fabric of your panties a couple times, swiping back and forth, teasingly, before pulling them to the side.
You gasp as the cold air from your bedroom meets your now exposed wetness before Joost slides a thumb through your folds, gathering your arousal before pressing on your clit. He draws circles against the sensitive nerves, coaxing gentle moans from you.
You need him terribly, as enjoyable as phone sex had been while he was away on tour, nothing could ever compare to the real thing. Sometimes it felt like Joost knew your body better than you did yourself, always able to make you feel a sort of pleasure you hadn't known was possible.
"Lay on your back," Joost commands, his voice still gentle. You do exactly as he says, whining a little at the loss of stimulation as his hand leaves your crotch.
You lay flat against the bed, staring up at the ceiling as Joost's fingers find themselves in the waistband of your panties, sliding them down the length of your legs and discarding them across the room.
Perched between your legs, Joost motions you to bend them, putting you on full display for him.
"So pretty," He muses as his eyes trail your naked figure. His small praise has your body hot as you position your gaze towards him.
His tongue swipes across his lips as he stares down at you, eyes aflame with desire. You had never seen a picture so perfect, the way that the warm glow of the sun seeped into your bedroom, illuminating him just right. You marveled at the man in front of you, even after years it had felt unbelievable that he was yours.
Joost leans forward, letting his hands rest on your thighs, pulling them apart. Soon his lips are pressed to your abdomen, soft kisses being littered against your skin before they eventually trail lower. One final kiss is placed just above your clit, forcing your back to arch as you all but beg for him.
A smirk graces Joost's mouth before his tongue leaves his lips, softly licking at you, forcing a sharp, "Oh," to leave you.
His tongue circles around your clit a few more times before being replaced with his lips, sucking at the bundle of nerves.
Each new movement of his mouth against you has you whining with pure delight, his tongue slowly trailing down to your entrance before dipping inside.
"Fuck.' You sputter, your hands finding their way into his hair. Joost's tongue flattens against your cunt, licking a long stripe from your entrance to your clit, before pressing a kiss to it. The sensation has you gripping at the messy blonde strands of his hair, causing Joost to groan. The vibration his low voice makes against your pussy causes your abdomen to tighten, and your body to twitch in pure delight.
He pulls back for just a second, making you whimper at the lack of stimulation,
"Taste so good, schatje," He mumbles, pressing a kiss to your inner thigh, "God, I missed this- missed your pussy."
His sweet words only make your body grow hotter, tingling with fervent arousal.
He continues to work his tongue against your cunt, skillful licks followed by sporadic kisses. The pleasure you feel is so intense that it is almost painful, loud, high-pitched moans now replace your soft whines.
Joost's lips envelop your clit, sucking at the swollen bud, his mouth is warm, wet, and unrelenting against your sensitive nerves, and you feel your legs trembling, you know you're close.
Your fingers grip Joost's hair, tight, as the stimulation almost becomes too much to bear.
"So close," You whine, but Joost doesn't seem to acknowledge your words, only continuing to push you closer to completion with his mouth. You rock your lips against Joost's face, forcing his tongue further onto you.
Your eyes force themselves shut as you feel your orgasm crashing into you, no words can escape your mouth, only strained noises as your toes curl, muscles tense, and legs twitch. Your cunt spasms under the pressure of Joost's warm mouth, your arousal spilling out of you and onto his tongue.
Joost doesn't spare a single drop as your orgasm rolls over you, the intense wave slowly subsiding as your eyes flutter open. Still, Joost's tongue remains buried inside of you, collecting your release. His lingering licks force a strained whine out of you, sore with overstimulation.
Joost eventually pulls back from you, his wet lips trailing kisses on your thighs before raising his head completely.
You struggle to catch your breath as Joost's head emerges from between your thighs, sitting up, a grin pressed against his lips, glossy from you.
You swallow thickly as you look down his body, noticing the way his cock strains against the tightness of his underwear, the white fabric spearing no detail about how he was feeling.
If he were to touch you now you'd surely cry from overstimulation, yet- somehow it seemed to be all you wanted- him, buried deep inside you.
Joost rests a hand on your thigh before turning a sympathetic gaze to you,
"Too tired to continue?"
"No," You shake your head.
"Good," His lips curling into a smirk, "I know you can hold out a little longer for me."
You nod, affirming his words,
"Need you, please." You whine, staring right at him, your sore legs parting once more as you speak.
Joost lurches forward, holding himself above you with his arms positioned on either side of you. He lowers himself slightly to press a kiss to your lips. You moan at the lingering taste of your release on him.
His kisses trail to your neck, sucking softly against your beating pulse. Your desperate hands roam his body, aching just to feel him.
"You know I love you, right?" He mumbles against your neck.
"Mhm," You sigh, content, "I love you too."
He lifts his head from where it is buried against you, looking straight down at you once more, shaking his head,
"I don't ever want to lose you, liefje." He speaks in earnest, eyes widening. Your heart feels like it's skipping beats as his intense gaze lingers on you, drawing out those feelings you had been keeping unsaid.
"I know," You whisper, "We're going to be okay." You nod, you know it. Joost nods with you, his gaze softening as he lowers a kiss to your cheek.
"You don't know how bad I've wanted his," Joost's voice is suddenly low, seductive.
"I think I do," You smirk, "And I think I may want this even more."
"Yeah," He breathes, "Why don't you show me then, mooi meisje" (pretty girl)
Joost rolls over, landing on his back, causing the bed to bounce slightly. You straddle Joost's legs, fingers trembling with excitement as they tease the waistband of his boxers.
You lean forward, pressing kisses to his stomach, eventually leading down to the elastic of his underwear. You can feel his breathing deepen as your lips grace his waist
You let your hand fall from where it toyed with the elastic, your palm rolling over his crotch. You feel his cock twitch under your light touch. You flick your eyes up to him, where he lays, propped up on the pillows, mouth open slightly.
You smirk as you continue to palm him through his boxers, his hips beginning to buck into your hand.
"Come on, schatje." He just about begs, hips stuttering forward. A smirk graces your lips, "Fuck, come on, I need you."
There's something of a desperation in his voice, his blatant desire for you just about knocking the wind out of you. Yes, teasing him was fun... but fucking him was definitely way better.
You bite your lip, your head lowering in a slow nod as your fingers return back to the waistband of his boxers as you begin to tug them down. He doesn't hesitate to help you out, lifting his back just slightly so you're able to pull them down his thighs, his hard cock springing from the confines of the fabric.
You give him a sheepish smile as his back returns to the mattress, leaning forward once more and wrapping your hand around the base of his cock. Your firm grip causes him to grasp as you slowly begin to pump your hand up and down the shaft.
Joost's head tips back as you continue to work your hand up and down his cock. You feel your own arousal growing as you watch his face, his jaw clenching as struggled groans leave his mouth.
"Stop that," He breathes out, "Come here, want you on top of me." He beckons.
You remove your hand from him, slowly crawling up the length of his body before stopping, now straddling his upper thighs. Joost flicks his head up, motioning for you to continue. You sit up, positioning yourself above him.
"That's it," He purrs as you grab the base of his cock, lining him up with your entrance. The head grazes your wet folds, causing you to gasp, only craving him more. You look back up at Joost, waiting for permission to continue. He nods fervently, "Go on, I know you want it."
"Yeah," You sigh, maintaining eye contact with him as you begin to sink down on him. Your lips purse, forming a straight line, eyes squeezing shut as he begins to stretch you out, and you take your time to fully take him in.
"Fuck, liefje," Joost groans as he bottoms out into you.
"You want me to go faster?"
"No," Joost breathes out, "No this is perfect, take it slow, schatje, enjoy the moment."
You're fine with that, slowly raising your hips until only the tip of his cock is in you, before sinking down onto Joost once more.
Joost sits up, grabbing your hips to help guide you at a steady pace that feels good for both of you. But it's not long before his hands leave your hips, palms sliding up and down your body, the pads of his fingers grabbing at you, groping wherever he can get his hands on.
"Joost," You whine as he hits that perfect spot inside you, "Oh, fuck, Joost."
"Feels good?" He asks, knowingly, his breathing heavy, "It's like you were made for me- fuck, you were made for me." He remarked at how perfect you felt around him.
All you can respond with is a series of sloppy moans and whines, the feeling of him inside you making your brain go numb.
"That's it," He groans, "Use that pretty voice, show me how good you feel."
Joost settles his grip on your ass, his dull fingernails digging into your flesh, pinching just enough to elicit a delightful sting. Joost's handle on you once again helps you maintain a steady pace as your legs begin to tire, muscles starting to burn from your consistent movement. To further help you, he begins bucking his hips in time with your movement, thrusting into you as you sink down onto him.
The way he repeatedly hits inside you makes it hard for you to concentrate, your only focus is on the overwhelming amount of pleasure you feel, each thrust forward coaxing you closer to another orgasm.
You begin to fall forward, your head resting on Joost's shoulder, as your chest collides into his. Your bodies are hot, sticky with a thin sheen of sweat, and the heat he gives off is almost unbearable as you rest against him. But the rest of your body is far too overwhelmed to sit up straight
"I love you," You slur out against his neck, dizzy off adoration and pleasure.
"I love you too, liefje," His hands lose their grip on your ass, instead his arms coming around to hold you at the waist. Joost places small kisses on your shoulder as your movements quicken, losing any pace, "I love you so much." He reiterates.
You're close, heat building in your abdomen as every muscle in your body constricts. You know you can't hold on much longer, your orgasm about to hit you at any moment now.
"I'm gonna-" You sputter, unable to finish your sentence as its broken by a sharp moan, your cunt clenching as an intense wall of pleasure smacks right into you. Your eyes flutter, your whole body twitching as your pussy spasms around Joost's cock, causing him to groan, your movements becoming sloppier as your release spills out of you, lewd, wet sounds filling the room.
"Good," Joost exhales, "Cum all over my cock, liefje."
Your orgasm soon disappears as Joost continues to thrust upwards into you, pleasure soon turning into overstimulation as you slump completely into him.
"Not much longer," He reassures, "You're doing so good."
Tears begin to spill down your cheeks at the feeling, your already sensitive nerves being worked to the extreme.
Joost's hips start to staccato, his thrusts becoming sharp, causing you to yelp into the spot where your head is buried into his neck. He grips you tighter, feeling like he's about to suffocate you before with a last grunt he's spilling into you, warm ribbons of cum coating the walls of your cunt with a few final thrusts.
Your body is trembling as you attempt to lift yourself up from where you lay against Joost, your body still tingling with lingering pleasure. Your eyelids are low as you look at Joost, your face carrying an entirely blissed-out expression.
A smile falls on Joost's lips,
"Oh," He chuckles, a hand coming up to wipe the tears from your cheek, "These are the only tears I ever want to make you cry."
You return a smile to him before his expression changes,
"Het spijt me, schatje" (I'm sorry, baby), His words are full of regret, "I'm so sorry for how things have been."
"I know," Your voice barely a whisper, "I'm sorry too."
"Things will be better, now that I'm home," He presses a kiss to your shoulder, "I promise."
"I know- I know they will," You nod.
If there was anything you knew for certain, you knew that you and Joost loved each other too much to stop fighting for your relationship. A rough patch of a few weeks had been nothing in comparison to the countless happy memories the two of you shared.
"Ik hou van jou, liefje," Another kiss to your shoulder, "Don't ever forget that."
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