#I just really like singing idk man
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Damn. Kinda bored rn. Anyone up for karaoke?
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I've started playing Potion Permit, and so far it's one of my favorite games I've messed around with, but the most big brained move the devs made was giving you a dog on day 1, and then making that dog able to track NPCs and lead you directly to them no matter where they are in the town.
#im still early game but i like the play and the writing is passable#like#Theres a flatness#the characters Are distinct but theyre mostly just their jobs#with only a few who stand out and have like. something to really grab onto#Like rue? rues entire deal is little girl you can date. Nothing else behind those eyes. She has nothing better to talk to you about#than the fact her favorite color is red#Sorcelia? Sorcelia is a goth nun who loves singing and teaches one of the village children#Reynerd? sure is a guy#got nothing else to say about him. hes just a Guy™. Victor? Has ghost friends and loves bugs and cares deeply about the cemetery#he tends to. At the moment it feels like they're trying to imply there aren't actually ghosts. and hes just talking to himself/#insisting his imaginary friends are real people#and so far? The games been cool about it. Victor's a member of his community and his eccentricities are accepted and not ridiculed#all four characters ive mentioned are romance candidates. but its just as hit or miss with the regular towns folk#Opalheart is an older woman and a world renowned blacksmith who only takes jobs if they will do Good. regardless of whether or not they#pay well. She declines to make a dagger for a rich man but makes a helmet for a childs father bc the girl asked#and olive is here#anyways you can be best friends with a cat (shes just a regular cat) and i appreciate that#idk im putting it above sun haven in my ranking of life sim games#purely because there are older romance candidates.#no fat romance candidates. but sun haven doesn't have thise either.#and sdv has neither fat or old candidates Nor can you fuck a cat boy. it goes at the bottom.#gameplay wise sunhaven is at the bottom then sdv then potion permit at the top. sunhaven has the Most™ but having#a lot of crap doesn't mean its fun and it ends up making half the game feel really incomplete#idk. Sdv is a game you should've started playing a year ago. sun haven is a game that perpetually needs another year worth of updates#before id say its worth it bc the devs keep pushing content ™ updates instead of quality of life or polish so what is there is uh#Bad. plentiful. and a large portion is good#but a Lot is just bad.#its insincere and cant take itself seriously it gives you (the right dialogue option) an (the shit joke option) which is worse than just#i ram out of space. tldr. potion permit is good Now. sdv Was good. sun haven Might be great Eventually
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I'm watching the Awakening movie and WHY IS TIKKI RAPPING
#WHY#the fact that marinettes singing voice is SO different roo#why is it musical in the first place#i also audibly said no when adrien showed up#but thats just me#also#im starting to feel like im a gabriel simp??????#idk man he has a really nice voice#also chloe is just si cartoonishly evil its really funny to me xdd#miraculous ladybug#miraculous ladybug awakening
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no thoughts, just the way the narumi sisters are so different yet fundamentally similar at the same time yk?
#i love the functionally dysfunctional relationship of the narumi sisters to an unhealthy degree i think…#i’ve just been thinking about how both sisters put each other up on a high pedestal while having a less than high opinion of themselves and.#aaaaaaa just the way sena calls mona her angel while thinking of herself as a useless/subpar older sis#a n d how the main source of mona’s depression is her constant comparisons with her beloved big sis sena is just. aaaaa#just!!!! the way sena pushes herself past her limits in her attempts to portray herself as an ideal big sis for mona#even at the expense of her own health sometimes (see also: the beach sisters honeypre event)#i really feel like the way sena thinks she isn’t good enough of a big sis to mona is pretty glossed over for the most part tbh.. man.#(i have many thoughts on this tbh. none of them coherent)#and just. aaaaaaaaaaaa im really happy that both of them have great support systems (their families + [midori for sena]/[monacas for mona])#like. even though they don’t personally think they’re good enough compared to their ideals…#at least they have people who are there to love them for who they truly are. their true selves (honto no watashi) if you will—#idk i just wish both of them could see themselves exactly how their sister sees them…#b ut man i really want idol sengen season 2 just so that we may be able to see how sena reacts upon finding out what happens to the bracelet#i doubt they’ll show it in an mv but. man. i really want to know how she’ll react…#im probably misremembering and misinterpreting a bunch of stuff about sena huh… i miss her thoughhh#i miss seeing the sisters together tbh. i think the gen 3 sibling pairs should sing together a la tokyo [season] session style
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hi. for people who saw gatsby: an american myth. do you remember mckee asking nick for lunch. and then gatsby in like the next scene inviting nick for lunch. because i remember.
#not pjo#chitter chatter#when gatsby was like 'we should do lunch' i was like. hello. fucking. hello. are we. hello.#gatsby really said we just met literally 5 minutes ago. come meet my father figure. normal normal thing to do jay.#to be clear gatsby also asks him to go to lunch in the book. but like. there's a time skip. and also#in the show after mckee asks they immediately start making out on the couch. none of this ... nonsense#so the vibes are a LITTLE different in my brain.#i saw a few people say they didnt think gatsby and nick flirted enough and like while i do think that think part of it is we're#in nick's pov but not his HEAD#he DOES start singing about gatsby's smile for no reason until jordon is like. alright buddy. lets talk about daisy.#like nick was just Doing That. pull it together carraway.#but i got the vibe (JUST my take) that gatsby was like. kinda into nick. zero reason to be leaning into his space like that sir.#however when he actually MET daisy again he became kinda singularly focused on her again#i mean he built his whole lifeup to this moment#he says it at the end. he murdered pieces of himself to bring himself here. for DAISY.#him snapping back to daisy mode makes sense to me but he still reaches out for nick as a comfort in the sense that hes like#nick do NOT leave please stay with us. daisy does the same. and ofc part is that theyre really. fucking awkward. but like.#LET ME HAVE MY OWN NONSENSE INTERPRETATIONS. HES TRAPPED BY WHITENESS AND CLASS AND HETEROSEXUALITY.#hes already so much of an outsider trying to fit in. (i also think he loves daisy or an ideal at least. and she's EASIER to love. safer.)#nick inherently has more freedom even as a gay man in the sense that hes richer and white and an ivy league dude i mean you understand righ#right????????#even if its in the book i do wanna point out the parallels between those moments. im choosing to see it as deeply intentional <3#this show had a lot of repetition and parallels (see daisy and myrtle in a lot of songs and scenes)#(one i LOVE is tom giving myrtle a necklace and daisy later giving TOM her necklace in case he sees anyone he knows. idk love that shit)#im...gonna queue this#im embarrassed to talk about this show so much. so. into the queue it goes!!!#all the worlds a stage#so like. anyway. thats where i think nick's mind immediately went when gastsby asked him for lunch. personal headcanon <3#gatsby after one convo: we're doing lunch // me and nick immediately: oh ok! guess that's a date then!
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i want to crawl under my desk and go to sleep
#that is not possible because i cannot fit under there#damn it#i want a nest man#somewhere nice and cozy and just for me where i can stare at the wall for hours#that sounds.. good#btw i'm really tired of not being a pretty boy like what the fuck#lol the mental illness really shining through tonight#but i opened pinterest and almost burst into tears because there was a pretty guy and i am not him#sigh i guess i have to be this horrible thing until i die#unfair really#i need to be medicated i think it would help#i just haven't felt great the last few days#wait. couple of weeks?#i can't remember.#but i don't feel like me.#at least i have my stupid otome soundtrack to keep me company sing at me pretty anime boys.#lol watch me delete this in 9 minutes or smth#unless i forget#idk i just wanted to vent i guess don't read this shit#i'm happy nice aerie really. just not right now#god it's only 7:45#at least my hair is clean i guess#sigh#diaerie#delete later
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the THING about Disloyal Order Of Water Buffaloes is that, #1, it is one of the most melodically satisfying songs I've ever heard and that's why it was one of the first FOB songs I actually listened to of my own free choice, and #2, it makes people crazy insane bc so many of the lyrics simply make zero sense on a surface level EXCEPT "I'm half doomed and you're semi sweet" which IMMEDIATELY gets across its point and acts as a thesis statement to the song, thus allowing an understanding of the rest of the lyrics to fall into place
#especially the second verse I still have to think about a lot bc it sounds like nonsense until you really dig into it#but I tend to interpret it as actually somewhat literal#a lot of truck stops have fancy painted porcelain or glass doll displays or souvenirs (which is how I read the lizard scales line#which is also funny bc usamerican truck stop gift shops often make zero sense in most ways skskskdkdn)#and it's kind of like this weird futility. like it's pretty on the surface it's nostalgic but it's also SO out of place#and probably cheap and veneered as well#which is.... absolutely fascinating in the wider context of folie and its creation#something something music industry something something the band itself at certain points in their history (especially#right before the hiatus)#idk man. all I know is that disloyal order is insane and also insanely fun to sing. the melody is just OUGH I wanna drink it#she speaks!#m#fob#fall out boy#folie a deux
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I can’t even imagine living without anxiety. Like. How. What?
#I mean if I woke up tomorrow with a normal amount of anxiety it would be a shocking difference to my daily life. and I am medicated!!! like.#what? am I missing something here?#my mom tells me that meds can only do so much and that they’re really just meant to make it so you can get out of bed every day#but now I’m wondering like is that true or is that my mom is on the wrong dose herself and something could be done to help us both#gahhhhh idk I just feel helpless bc I’m scared of making big changes and the big changes have to make are scary and large and I need a#bulleted list made of things I can do (and break down into very small steps) to actually progress in a positive way in my life instead of#being SO afraid and SO stagnant. it’s been six months since (ptsd diagnosis causing thing) and I don’t feel like I’ve made any progress even#with a therapist. I’m working towards a more intensive program but I feel like it’s almost making me feel more alienated bc I’d have to like#go be surrounded by other mentally ill people and medical people which brings dad dying trauma and like I know I’m running from it bc I’m#afraid to face the changes I need to make and the feelings that are going to come up but fuck man can’t I get some fucking meds that make#this easier to deal with!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! grief and ptsd and long term isolation and anxiety and chronic pain like fuck it’s#so exhausting!!!! I feel like I’m fucking fighting thru life and then from the outside it’s like I’m doing nothing cause I stay in my room#and get stoned and play animal crossing and watch tv and cry and over eat and sometimes I drive around in circles so I can scream sing until#my throat burns and I get a headache and everything finally quiets down in my head for a second. I know I look like I’m doing nothing and#that’s because I am doing nothing but waiting for the next time a mental health professional will talk to me for an hour like it’s so sad#anyways. you ever take a big dab and then start crying and type all of this like it’s an epiphany even tho it’s things you already know.#honestly crying in front of the air conditioner is so slay slight breeze over my face cooling the tears the white noise calming me down
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it's... interesting to me how the lyrics for Hum Hallelujah read as "I sing the blues and you swallow them too," but I've always heard it (and to a degree it makes more sense in the context of the song) as "I sing the blues and swallow them too"
#I'm not gonna get into it super heavily on main but within the context of what that song is actually about there's basically two options#either it is ''sing the blues and swallow them too'' which makes the most sense at face value to me bc of. everything about that song#OR it IS ''and YOU swallow them too'' and it's another instance of pete writing patrick's POV into a song#which is like. WILDLY insane to think about and deeply deeply painful actually#bc then it REALLY takes on the double meaning of blues as in music -> blues as in pills#idk man I just am thinking really hard about this now#Lu rambles#music#fob#fall out boy
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I listened to that splatoon song while reading the comments and now I'm having two thoughts
The one thing I really don't like about their music is that you just cannot hear those vocals. I know it's intentional, both because it's a stylistic choice and because they're speaking gibberish pretty much, but still
What in the WORLD did that guy on twitter say. And how did people not know what the song was about after looking at the title and hearing the song
#I think I need to convince my brain it's kinda like fnf music. It's just a melody. There is no lyrics. There is no war in ba sing se#but then that just makes me go “man I can't really hear this melody”#still that song is kinda a banger#like I like the beat. idk how to describe it#all I can say is “nasty majesty” is a great description of the song. and I'm here for it#I really like the bassline and “drums”
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Shoutout to my Monkees mutuals for reminding me about the Monkees and their music; now I'm thinking about how She is such a season 2 Damon talking about Katherine song.
Meanwhile, 1864 Damon is of course firmly Vampire Girl by the Misfits (he would die for her, and he did).
#Damon Salvatore#The Vampire Diaries#Datherine#the Monkees#She#that post defending Auntie Grizelda got me listening to them a little again and first of all She slaps#and second of all Damon is singing it about Katherine. privately of course. but in his heart#Vampire Girl#the Misfits#I like to imagine Damon would be very fond of both of these songs#some people see him as a Taylor Swift fan because he mentions her but he specifically says that he *tolerates* her music to get girls#the only music we canonically know he listens to is Enjoy the Silence by Anberlin and 21 Guns by Green Day. So really he's an emo#well and Ask the Angels by Dead Sara in season 5#I'm trying to think of any other diegetic music Damon chose in some way. but just based on those three I'd say he's a man of taste#and I like to imagine there's some diversity in what he listens to#assigned Monkees fan by way of my tumblr mutuals hehehe#anyways time for my monthly main blog post#idk I need to bring these things more into balance. but ah well here we are#I love how tumblr is just all of our obsessions bumping up against each other and sometimes meshing together#I should reblog with applicable lyrics#some music for my favorite terrible vampire man <3 ;)#update: I was gonna pick some lyrics but nevermind it's really just the whole song#although 'she needs someone to walk on so her feet don't touch the ground' hits in particular#Vampire Girl is pretty lyrically straightforward but it definitely hits human Damon's devotion to her#also I know it's not necessary to italicize song titles but I wanted She to stand out because I feel like if you don't know the song#you might think I just capitalized a random word. so I wanted to be clear#I ramble#even in the tags I ramble
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I would absolutely love for at least one of my friend groups to completely go all out for me for my birthday. The way girls at school get huge sashes and gift baskets from their friends. I've never really had that. I've never really had a group of friends band together to do something super special for my birthday aside from getting on call with my two best besties to play roblox. Which i guess is a bit disheartening because I've organized stuff like this for several people. I've put together calls so we could all sing happy birthday to someone and celebrate with them. Hell, not even a birthday celebration, but i once organized a going away party with my entire friend group for one of our friends who was moving to another state, because i loved them i wanted to them to know they'd be loved and missed by us. It would be nice to be on the receiving end of that but also it feels really silly to just Ask my friends to plan something special for me cause 1. Those are supposed to be surprises 2. I know it is My birthday and I have every right want to be treated like the center of the universe but I still feel very selfish asking people Hey can you make this day all about me and put effort into it please. Also it feels less genuine when people have to be Asked to celebrate me yknow. Idk maybe the realization that I'm turning 18 years old is finally fully kicking and that's what's got me down lately but man. For my birthday I really just want to know that I'm loved and wanted and not a nuisance that pisses people off every time I open my mouth
#Also and this is where I get really annoying but most of the time I don't get gifts from people who aren't my family#My last birthday i got gifts from two people out of my several friends and friend groups who really didn't do much#Other than wish me happy birthday or my two friends who always get on roblox with me#Which is also disheartening because i try to make gifts for everyone for their birthdays and christmas#If it's not something huge like the animatic and the animation meme and the attempted pmv I made then it's a thoughtful art piece#And if it's not that then it's at least singing them happy birthday and giving them a hug and letting them know I love them#Which I'm not gonna stop doing and I will never stop doing#I have too much love in my heart to ignore someone's birthday out of spite and I do not make things expecting something in return#Even if someone never ever gives me a birthday gift I will still give something to them every year because I don't want to be bitter#But I guess it just gets tiring after a while#Trying to do everything for everyone while barely anyone puts in the same effort for me#Again I'm not gonna ask anyone for a gift cause 1. Selfish 2. Disingenuous if it needed to be asked for#I guess I just wish more people valued me enough that they'd already do all this stuff for me#Make me gifts and treat me like I matter the most#Because I know i try to do that for everyone else#Idk I still feel selfish saying all this but also it's My 18th Birthday I think I deserve to be a little selfish#Man I need to go to bed midnight is always when I get ungodly sad over things I have no control over#harry osborn or whatever the fuck the new generation says /j
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#uh oh#may or may not be catching feels for a VERY pretty man#look its not my fault okay. when you cruise down country backroads with someone singing sherry darling at the top of your lungs#and basically between the two of you knowing every fucking word off that album#and then he quipped a movie back at me that i made him watch yesterday#like i dont really WANT to even consider this seriously#because i want out of this godforsaken town as soon as possible#but good god im really enjoying.... idk. is it just attention? im terrible at knowing that#(also hes got better hair than i do so)
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i realized i made a few of whatever these are on a separate profile. so here. have the funnies
read more for additional ones i make!
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phoenix edge tierers scare me. in a good way. not going anywhere near that event though (i got top 3000 and i'm so ANGRY bc i was 2018 or something like that... so close to top 2000...)
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i try to keep the last page of my profile relevant so my friends know i'm active. it was a bit since phoenix edge ended, so i was thinking what i should put. then i remembered april fools last year and how i kept spamming the same screenshot of mfks talking to luka lmao
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"and how's that coming along?" it IS coming! next question.
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this is actually the first kizuna that i get the second title from and honestly??? couldn't be happier. i am love mnhr
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my farewell to my masked self team is named "mfmom die" actually
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it's okay mfks nation. we got this. i know we do.
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this one was made like in january but it's topical again bc they're next to each other in enseka's 2.5 banner too lmao
#project sekai#prsk#proseka#minori hanasato#ena shinonome#idk man they're here the most#oh also miku and rin but i feel bad using the vocaloid tags jhebrhjgr#'alma the magical showtime one was just top 1000 how much of a hell could've it given you'#IT WAS MY FIRST TIME EVER TRYING TO LIKE. TIER#200 PULLS AND I ONLY GOT NENE. SPARKED FOR TSUKASA ON THE VERY LAST DAY NOT BECAUSE I WANTED HIM. BUT OUT OF PRIDE#feel free to shame my brother for not singing cosmospice with me. together we can shame him so he indulges me. we can build a better future#don't shame him for wanting me to burn tsukasa on my fic that was funny#these are all very specific and also about my fic which makes it even more specific#but what is tumblr if not a place to put my bs in#anyway#i also did a custom profile to document the hell i went through tiering for the minori event specifically if you guys want i can upload it#or not. i'll end up uploading it anyway. but still. some feedback would be nice ig#the mfks one is really outdated and it was even when the event the rin card is from released on en bc they had already met but#that's how it was. they didn't even meet and i was like 'oh so they're married?'
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dino is actually such an objectively solid vocalist and honestly in the like. upper ranks within the group overall
#I'm not just saying this cause i wanna jump his bones#I'm watching whatever actually live performances i can find and like#his support is so solid#and while i LOVE svt#besides their two main vocals#a lot of the group falls into the 'decent but not great' category#which i think is fine honestly most groups don't achieve that lmao#and idk maybe that makes dino being in the upper ranks less impressive#but man he really worked hard on his vocals and it paid tf off#I'm so proud of him#and i love that i truly love his voice#no bias required#shhh cassia#fr tho what can't he do...........#already one of the best main dancers#pleasant rap abilities#and GOOD singing?#king shit
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#im to embarassed to talk abt him but omg im gonna EXPLODE#cutest boy EVER in the world EVER EVER EVER#his cute glasses and his pretty eyes and his smile lines and crows feet and the way the hairs at the front curl into a heart shape#the way he sits and the way he stands and the way he talks to his family and the way the big t shirts he wears sits on his waistband and#hes insecure about his body and his acne but hes literally so gorgeous I have no idea why he is#goddddd cutest boy in the worldddd i like him so much it makes me feel sick#at prom (26th june) he tied some loose fabric around my wrist and its still there now#his jeans i see him wear all the time cus theyre his favourite like he has favourite jeans im àaaaaaaaaaa#the way he throws his head back when he laughs and the specific “ha-HAA” laugh he does when he isnt expecting it#his stupid chai latte that he really likes#how he always has to say goodnight 3 times before he stops talking#how he uses the purple heart emoji rather than the regular ones#i had a dream once that we were laying in my bed when everyone was asleep just whispering and giggling and he left in a hurry back to-#wherever he was staying and we were laughing and when the door clicked behind him i just felt so light#UGH HES SO CUTE#his big dramatic expressions and how everything becomes a story#the stupid facial expression he pulls where his tongue goes out and hos eye brows arch when he makes any kind of dance move#the way he giggles when hes about to make a joke#(richie tozier voice) CUTE CUTE CUTE#omg his VOICE. oh my god. oh my god. oh my god man. oh god. help me. god be with me. please.#hes playing troy bolton rn so he keeps singing HSM and im just AAAAAAA I CANT. I CANTICANTICANT#the way his instinct is to grab my wrist/lower arm/hand whenever anything happens#OAIAHAUAGAH GUYS. GUYS I WILL NOT SURVIVEEEEE#his eyes are like. slanted? idk how to describe it but theyre lower on the outside and theyre soooooo gorgeous#ughhh both his eyes and hair are like so-dark brown theyre nearly black and its so fucking pretty i cant do this#at prom i had to lean in to talk to him & vice versa and at some point we were sat towards eachother with his legs kinda like barricading-#mine yk. ugh. he was so sweet and so cute the whole time. like helping me walk in the heels and opening doors for me and following me around#UGHHHH I CANT. GUYS. HELP.#☕#beverly says stuff
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