#and probably cheap and veneered as well
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the THING about Disloyal Order Of Water Buffaloes is that, #1, it is one of the most melodically satisfying songs I've ever heard and that's why it was one of the first FOB songs I actually listened to of my own free choice, and #2, it makes people crazy insane bc so many of the lyrics simply make zero sense on a surface level EXCEPT "I'm half doomed and you're semi sweet" which IMMEDIATELY gets across its point and acts as a thesis statement to the song, thus allowing an understanding of the rest of the lyrics to fall into place
#especially the second verse I still have to think about a lot bc it sounds like nonsense until you really dig into it#but I tend to interpret it as actually somewhat literal#a lot of truck stops have fancy painted porcelain or glass doll displays or souvenirs (which is how I read the lizard scales line#which is also funny bc usamerican truck stop gift shops often make zero sense in most ways skskskdkdn)#and it's kind of like this weird futility. like it's pretty on the surface it's nostalgic but it's also SO out of place#and probably cheap and veneered as well#which is.... absolutely fascinating in the wider context of folie and its creation#something something music industry something something the band itself at certain points in their history (especially#right before the hiatus)#idk man. all I know is that disloyal order is insane and also insanely fun to sing. the melody is just OUGH I wanna drink it#she speaks!#m#fob#fall out boy#folie a deux
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Neon Lights and Neon Dreams
Delicate Weapon - Chapter 1
Leon x GN! Reader x Ada - Cyberpunk AU
A young lawman who just got his badge. A mysterious merc with a blackout past. A rocker with everything to prove. All of you, trying to survive in Night City. City of Dreams. A City where there are no happy endings. But damn, if you aren't going to fight for yours.
Cross posted on A03
Word Count: 9,066
CW: smut, threesome (m/gender neutral reader/f), oral sex (m & f receiving), fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, theft of personal information
18+ MDNI
Neon lights. Too many bodies. Voices crying out in rapturous joy, all drowned out in the wake of the speakers and the music they play. Your music.
No drug, no braindance, no anything in the world could feel better than you standing on that neon-lined stage, singing so hard you thought you might shed your body and give yourself to the music itself. Probably a byproduct of the pure and utter adrenaline shooting through you, making every line of your songs seem like the most important words you’ve ever spoken in your life. Performing at Lizzie’s Bar (even if you’re just opening for the main band) is a game-changer. A motherfucking miracle.
One that you owe, at least in part, to the woman with dark eyes that stares at you from the other side of the room. One could be forgiven for thinking that she owned the place, the way she lounges in a corner booth, one perfect leg folded over the other as she nurses some glowing drink. She isn’t decked out in the bright colors and cheap threads of everyone else in the bar - her dress is a deep red, her lips painted to match. Her hair is dark and cut short, unadorned. No neon for her. She doesn’t call attention to herself because she never needs to. Ada will always be the most beautiful woman in the room, at least as far as you’re concerned.
Even in the middle of a firefight, or when her brow is furrowed in the midst of a hack, she is beautiful.
And right now, because she is the reason you’re on this stage, singing this song, she’s absolutely breathtaking.
Payment for a job well-done hadn’t been enough for her. When Susie Q had zipped the eddies to you and Ada both, you’d been more than ready to leave and call it quits. Ada, though, had other plans. As per usual.
You liked to think that, after years of running the edge, you’d built up some toughness. Some professional veneer. Hard to make a living as a merc if you didn’t look like you could get shit done, but even you had blushed a bit when Ada told the goddamn Queen of the Moxes that you were not only a merc but a musician? You were sure that you’d looked like your circuitry overheated.
Still, one thing had led to another and when the opener band for tonight canceled . . . well, here you were, pouring your heart and soul into the microphone, shredding on your guitar. It’s not the music that usually plays at Lizzie’s, but you don’t give a shit because it’s yours and the people here seem to be enjoying it. More importantly, Ada is enjoying it. Maybe not for the music itself, but because it’s you that’s performing it.
She gives you a fox’s smile as your eyes meet hers, and you can tell from the way she’s watching you that she likes seeing you like this - unburdened and free.
It’s the look she gives you when she’s in a mood, when you know that the night is going to end with you tangled in her bedsheets, and all that thought does is make you sing harder. You sway your body as you play, bobbing your head and hips to the tune you spent so many hours agonizing over. In that moment all those nights in a shitty apartment with your ‘ganic fingers aching against steel strings, it’s all worth it for this.
Until you see Ada stand up from her corner booth, spare you one last glance, and walk off. You see her lips move and her optics glow orange like the fire you feel settling in your chest
Phone call.
She’s leaving your performance to take a phone call.
You know Ada Wong well, you like to think. As well as any one person can know her, at least. Years spent as her partner in the streets and the sheets have given you wisdom into who she is, and you know that part of that person you’ve come to adore is a woman to whom biz comes first. Hell, most of the gigs that you’ve been on (the violent kind and now the musical kind as well) have been secured by her. She’s the reason you’re able to keep that shitty apartment, in a lot of ways. You don’t fault her for taking that call, even now. Even when you want her to be focused on you and only you.
Still, you’re only human, despite the bits of chrome you’ve chipped over the years, and seeing Ada leave in the middle of your performance stings your painfully organic heart.
Fortunately, you have an entire club full of other people whose attention you can earn, and with Ada gone . . . now you’re determined to milk that attention for all it’s worth.
So you play on, your gaze sweeping the crowd. If you can’t have the eyes of the woman you want right now, then you’ll make damn sure you have everyone else’s. Your next song helps you with that - the last one of your little set that you’re playing. Your favorite.
You get up close to the mic - an old fashioned one you brought yourself - and your lips nearly brush the woven metal as you begin the opening words. It’s a low, sensual thing, more suited to the BD bar you’re playing in, and as soon as your voice rasps out those first few lines, you earn a few whoops from the crowd. Adoration has always been your drug of choice, and you’re getting a damn good high from all this. It’s almost enough to fill the void Ada left in her wake. Almost. But you were never one to end in anything other than spectacular fashion. So, you make a point to let your eyes find everyone in the crowd who will look at you. Daring them to listen to you. To hear your siren song. To love you, even if it’s only until the last notes have left their eardrums rattling.
Dozens of chromed out citizens of Night City, faces in the crowd bearing cyberware, lustful stares. Not everyone in Lizzie’s is watching you, but it’s enough. Those that are paying attention want you, you let yourself think as you go on, the song building. They want to be you or be with you. Narcissism has always been a facet of a good rocker, you’ve often thought, and for now, you indulge in it.
How could you not, when the audience watches you like they wish they were slung across your hips instead of your guitar?
When you hear them crying out as you begin to sing the song in earnest, picking up energy and tempo, your mesh and synth-leather outfit making you feel almost as powerful as the music does . . .
When you meet his gaze from across the bar, like something out of a cheap and cheesy braindance . . .
That gaze lingers, even as he tries to look away from you. To play it off like he wasn’t staring.
But he was.
There’s no escaping what you saw, and you make that clear to him as you lock your gaze onto him, letting him feel the heat of your stare. Because damn, he’s a nice person to stare at. He looks so out of place here, amidst all the Mox girls in their fishnets and the patrons who blend into the neon decor. You don’t glimpse any glowing tattoos or wild cybernetics on this man, oh no. Just a floppy haircut, a stylish blue and white edgerunner jacket, and a face that was, frankly, unfairly pretty. Not in the lethal way that Ada was beautiful; she could stop a heart with a look. This boy . . . he could melt one.
He almost did just that as he sheepishly looked back at you, his gaze faltering under your stare. It was hard to tell under the bright pink and blue lights, but you swore he was blushing.
Perfect.
If Ada wouldn’t pay attention . . .
You smile at the stranger as you sing, raising the hand that held your guitar pick and bringing it down hard across the strings of your instrument. The crowd cheers and that was reward enough, but the way that handsome man smiled at you? Oh, that was what made you give that last song your all.
Lyric after lyric you sang into the mic, riff after riff you played on your guitar, and all the while, you keep your gaze on the shy young man at the bar. When he didn’t look away from you this time, you found yourself more than pleased. You wanted him to stare. You wanted him to ignore the men elbowing him at the bar and focus solely on you. And then . . . well, you decide you wanted a whole lot more than that.
It was that man’s stare that keeps the performance alive as your set ends, as your voice tapers off, the music stopping. The high it all left in you stays as you take a bow and saunter off the stage, slinging your guitar onto your back. You intentionally let yourself get lost in the crowd, smiling as you see him crane his neck to try and catch a glimpse of you again.
Cute. So fucking cute.
You stalk through the bodies, effortlessly dodging those who wanted your attention. After all, you had your mind set on one man and one man only.
As you approach, you can hear a conversation at the bar - mostly one sided, from the sounds of it.
“Come on, Kennedy,” a young man said, his words slurred. “There’s only one reason to come to Lizzie’s, and it ain’t just to look.” You could see the person speaking as you moved through the crowd. Young, just like he sounded. Drunk, very clearly. Unremarkable, except for the fact that he was leaning hard into the one person in this bar you wanted to speak to.
Kennedy, apparently.
And this Kennedy looked rather uncomfortable as the man with him and those around him at the bar all snickered.
“Plenty of girls here,” another one piped in, clearly knowing each other, “or guys, whatever.”
“I know-”
“Oh, but he ain’t looking at all of them. Choom’s only been looking in one place all night-”
“Hey, don’t blame him. Been looking for that one in the catalog all night myself-”
“And you won’t find me there,” you say, butting in as you break through the throng of bodies at last. The rowdy party assembled at the bar goes silent for a moment as you approach. You like that. Almost as much as you like how Kennedy’s expression turns all nervous when you fix your eyes on him. “Sorry. Not a Mox, just performing here for the night.”
There were a few groans of disappointment that you took as a compliment. The catalog was a Lizzie’s Bar specialty - a list of the fine joytoys that worked here. You see a dancer you like, you find them in the catalog, then you find a braindance they recorded to buy. A safe enough practice, with the Mox watching. No actual touching involved, just the simulated memories of sex. Intimacy without actual intimacy.
Not what you were here for, tonight.
“Damn shame,” one of the young women accompanying Kennedy drawled. “You should consider it. You’d make a killing, you know.”
“Thanks for the advice,” you say, letting the woman’s invasive stare roll off of you. Let her look. She wouldn’t be touching, simulated or otherwise. “Now,” you said, turning your attention towards the man you’d come here for, “mind if I steal you away from your friends?” you asked, your eyes smokey as they fixed themselves on the pretty man who’d been staring at you while you performed.
Kennedy just looked at you like he wasn’t sure this was real. Like maybe he’d already been pulled into a braindance without him knowing.
“To, uh . . . do what?” He was surprised. Even after you’d basically sang your song to him directly, he was surprised.
So, you laughed, shaking your head and speaking like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “To dance.”
Kennedy just looks at you like you’ve offered him the moon. It’s a look that, frankly, makes you wish you had optics installed so you could take a picture. You can’t remember the last time someone looked that excited to dance with you.
Unfortunately, Kennedy doesn’t seem to be the only one excited.
“Nah, come on,” the drunk woman slurs, moving closer to you. Too close. “You won’t have any fun with the boy scout. Dance with me . . .” her hand finds your waist. “Won’t even need to rent a BD with me, baby.”
“Hey,” Leon stands, then. Ready to intervene. Ready to pull his comrade off of you.
He doesn’t get the chance, though.
Not when, with bolts of blue, you reach up and rest a palm against her cybernetic arm . . . and then she’s all but shot back against her bar stool, her eyes wide and her hair sticking up with static at the ends. The group looks like they’re ready to intervene, come to their friend’s defense . . . but the Moxes at the bar, the ones who are very openly carrying iron and have cybernetics of their own, make them halt. Hot-headed as the group is, they know better than to piss off the gang who runs this place.
You lower your hand, electricity sparking from the cybernetic palm on your dominant hand - one of the few bits of chrome you’ve chipped in recent years. You aren’t sure if the sparks reflecting in his eyes are the only reason Leon’s expression looks so bright as he looks at you.
“Um . . . that was . . . shocking,” he says with a boyish smile.
You snort because, “Damn, choom, that was bad.” Either way, you offer him your other, fully organic hand. “Think you owe me a dance to make up for a shitty joke, no?”
His palm against yours is all the answer you need.
The main band has started playing. Purples and blues washed over the two of you as you guided him, music pulsing from the speakers loud enough to rattle your bones. Ada, as much as you look for her, is still notably absent. You had to shout as you faced him at last with a smile. “You looked like you needed rescuing!”
The corners of his mouth turned up and god damn his smile was more breathtaking than it had any right to be. “That obvious, huh?”
“Almost as obvious as your staring.”
Just like that, his smile is gone. Zipped away like a light turning off. He looks absolutely mortified. “I . . . I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”
You laugh, shaking your head. Your hands find his easily, and you don’t miss how he goes still amidst the moving bodies around the two of you. “It’s okay,” you reassure him, leaning in so he can hear you better. “I was staring back, wasn’t I?”
Disbelief. Then acceptance, and his smile is back. Boyish. Adorable. “Yeah, I guess you were.” He doesn’t pull his hands away. Good.
“Kennedy, right?”
“Leon,” he shakes his head. “Kennedy’s my last name.”
Bold of him, giving out his full name in Night City. Then again, you supposed that anyone with a good scanner built into their optics could learn that much about him without him even saying. Lucky for him, you possess no such cyberware. Even if Ada keeps insisting that you should. No, you’re still mostly ‘ganic, despite your line of work. This man before you, though . . . he’s even more so. Not hardly any chrome at all, at least that you can see. Just that pretty face and a streak of color in his hair that you didn’t notice at a distance. Blue, you think. You give him your own name easily enough when he asks. You like the way he smiles when he says it back.
“So . . . you, uh, wanted to dance?” he asks, a little more confident now.
You just give him a dazzling grin, taking his hands and guiding them to your hips. “To start.”
Turned out to be just that: the start.
The main band finished their set and Ada hadn’t come back yet, so you pull Leon into a corner booth and paid for his drink (he has to pull out a physical ID, which is fucking hilarious to you), needing a break from dancing. The two of you had worked up a sweat, after all, but his hands had never wandered. Not once. Not even if you would have been alright if they had. No, he’d been nothing but respectful, and continued to be just that. Still, he didn’t shy away from you, either. Not now, as your side was pressed up against his in a corner booth, your smiles and conversation easily exchanged.
“Do you play here often?” he asks, and you hope the question is borne of a desire to see you again. A hope that if he returns to Lizzie’s, you’ll be there. It also tells you that he’s not a regular.
“Nah,” you shake your head. “First time, actually. I ran a gig for Susie Q, so she let me play the night as a bonus.”
“Oh,” Leon nods. “But you’re not with the Moxes, you said?”
“Nope.”
There was some hesitation as he asks what kind of job it was you’d done for the gang.
“Some Maelstrom boys had been stalking some of the dancers,” you answered simply, with a shrug. “They felt like something was off, but they didn’t want to risk any Moxes going onto Maelstrom turf to hunt them down, so I went instead. Gangoons won’t be following anyone anymore.” You and Ada had made sure of that.
The answer seems to appease Leon, the knot in his brow smoothing out. Still, he seems to be puzzling something out in his mind. “So you’re . . . uh, a merc, then?” It’s like he doesn’t want to throw the label around. Like he’s afraid it’ll bother you.
Definitely not a regular.
“You could say that, yeah,” you nod. “Trying to make more of a living with this-” you nudge your guitar, leaning up against the booth seat at your side, “but songs don’t make you a ton of eddies until you go big.”
“I think if you keep at it, you’ll get there.” He sounds so sure of that, and if he’s trying to win points in your book, it’s sure as hell working. “You’re pretty damn good.”
“Flattery will get you everywhere, you know,” you grin, and Leon laughs. He’s, frankly, too damn sweet for a place like this.
So, after a moment, you decide to voice the obvious.
“Hope you don’t mind me sayin’, but doesn’t seem like your scene, this place,” you observe, your fingers tracing the rim of the angular glass in your hand. You lift it to your lips but don’t drink the tequila in it. Not until you gesture to the crowd that still lingers at the bar - the one you stole Leon away from. “And your friends don’t seem like, well, friends.”
Leon chuckles, shrugging to concede your point. “It’s not. And they aren’t. Well . . . no, not really.” It’s an admission delivered with a laugh and a shake of his head, his fringe falling a little over his eye.
“So why come at all?”
A tilt of his head. A look almost like a grimace.
He was here for a graduation party, he tells you. His party, and the people with him. He hadn’t wanted to come in the first place, but they’d dragged him along anyway. Last night of freedom.
“What college?” You ask, and he stalls for a moment.
“Oh, uh, local in Watson. Nothing too fancy.”
Wasn’t often you met a college educated individual, much less one who went to Lizzie’s. Watson, as a district, was known more for its gang violence and clubs than its colleges. In short, his answer didn’t sound true at all, to you. You blamed it on the alcohol. Or maybe he was lying. Either way, none of your business, you supposed, so you smiled and congratulated him.
“What about you? Where’d you learn to play like that?”
A favorite question of yours to answer, because of the pride it instilled in you. “My old man taught me the basics. Everything else, I learned myself.” No schooling, no fancy training. Just you and a hand-me-down six-string, the way of the rockerboys of old.
Leon was just as thrilled to hear your answer as you were to give it, it seemed.
“Seriously?”
“Seriously.”
“That’s . . . damn, I would have thought you’d studied somewhere formally.”
That gets a laugh from you. “I don’t think there’s a single formal thing about me,” you declare, shaking your head and downing your tequila.
Leon laughs too. “That’s okay,” he reassures you. “I never really liked suits. The clothing or the people in them.”
“Now that is an attitude I can get behind,” you agree, setting the glass down. When you look back up, you’re closer to him. Leaning a little more into his side. Ada still isn’t here. It’s been, what, half an hour? More? Wouldn’t be the first time she’s ditched you. Nor the first time you’ve found someone else to keep you entertained for the night. “So,” you go on, “what things do you like?”
Leon’s a glass of whiskey in, now. They call it liquid courage for a reason, even nowadays. You think you have that drink to thank for the way his eyes, for just a split second, flit down to your lips. “You’re definitely making your way onto that list.”
Oh hell yes.
“Just making my way onto it?” You ask, your mouth curving up into a smirk. “Damn. Here I thought I was doing well.”
“You are,” Leon says, his tone just a little rushed. Cute. He leans in a little closer. “Trust me, you are.”
Pride widens your smile, as it so often does. “Thought so.”
“And . . . how am I doing?” He sounds hopeful. His eyes are on yours, searching. Questioning. His thigh tenses a little against yours, his hand resting on it and brushing your own.
You know better than to waste time, so you slide your hand over his. “Oh, you’re doing pretty damn good, I’d say.”
Leon’s eyes flash under the club’s lights. His Adam’s apple bobs. He’s so, so close now, but you want him to be closer. “Do you . . . do you have more songs than what you played tonight?” he asks, and you can tell it’s a leading question.
You nod, your voice even. Steady. “Lots more.”
The answer makes Leon smile wider. “I’d like to hear them.”
“I don’t play for free,” you said, deciding to take a little lead yourself. “Not even for someone as cute as you.”
There’s just a moment that hangs between the two of you, filled with pulsing music and flashing lights that all seems to fade. Leon doesn’t hesitate for any longer than that, though.
“Would a date be good payment?”
There it is. It’s not what you should be looking for, not when you’ve got a beautiful woman you’ll likely be going home with, but damn if it doesn’t make your heart warm.
A date.
“Hmmm,” you lean in, very nearly pressing your smile against his own. Your words are an echo of before. You know that’s not the only reason they make Leon grin. “To start.”
He surprises you, then. You don’t think that he’s going to, but he leans in anyway. It’s soft. Not the kind of kiss you’re used to. It speaks of firsts and tentative steps, caution and hope. He pulls away almost as soon as he starts, just to ask “Is this okay?”
And in no time at all you’re pressing him into the booth, mouths moving against each other. You swap the tastes of tequila and whiskey, and you find that as sweet as he is, he kisses desperately. There isn’t much finesse to it, but damn if he doesn’t make up for it with eagerness. He opens his mouth to you when you brush your tongue against his lips, and your fingers slide into soft hair and-
“Did you get bored while I was gone?” Her voice makes you smile, but it makes Leon freeze.
“You left me all alone,” you said, not at all bothered as you peel your gaze away from the man beside you. A man who, you realize, looks like he would short-circ, if he had chrome on him. “Had to find some company.”
You’re a little disappointed that Ada doesn’t look bothered. Then again, she so seldom does. Especially not when she likes whoever you’ve found to keep yourself occupied with. Whether she does like Leon or not . . . well, that remains to be seen. You know that the verdict is forming, though, as her optics flash blue, a telltale sign that she’s conducting a scan of the man sitting beside you.
“You . . .” Leon stammers, looking between you and the woman now standing on the other end of the table. “Are you-”
“With me? That fact might have slipped our . . . friend’s mind.”
“Just like you slipped away for most of the night,” you shoot back, giving Ada a knowing smile.
You know she isn’t mad, not really, when her own mouth curls up just a touch.
Was it shitty of you not to mention you were here with someone? Yes. But you know Ada doesn’t mind. That’s always been how the two of you operate. Free to roam where you please so long as you always come back home. Doesn’t mean you don’t try to make her jealous and vice versa, every so often. Doesn’t mean you don’t really, really like the man you were just kissing.
You just have to hope that Leon will understand.
Fortunately, Ada speaks before you get the chance to, her tone smooth as synth leather. “Don’t worry about it,” she says, and her optics return to their normal dark hue.
She looks completely unfazed, but Leon looks utterly taken aback.
You can’t help but smile as she studies Leon’s face just a touch longer, because you can practically see her making a decision. Ada is always good at that - thinking on her feet. And you’re good at reading her. Enough so that you catch on immediately when her usual reserved demeanor shifts. She smiles at Leon, her eyes “Thanks for keeping my musician company, Leon.” Ah, so she’d found his name already. “Now, hope you don’t mind the interruption,” she said, sliding into the booth. Not on your side, though. Oh, no. No, instead, Ada took a seat beside Leon, resting her elbow on the table as she leaned over it. “And I hope you don’t think three is a crowd, either.”
He doesn’t know how he got here.
Well, he knows how he physically got here: a trip in a sleek red car to the appropriately named No-Tell Motel, two flights up and three doors down to a room that smelled like cigarettes and cheap perfume. Even with the whiskey in his system, that part of the journey is clear enough. The part where he ended up sandwiched between two of the most beautiful people he’s ever seen, though? The how of him ending up with your lips and Ada’s taking turns at his throat?
Yeah, he has no fucking clue how that happened. All Leon knows as he grasps at both of you desperately is that he doesn’t want it to end.
“Oh my god . . .” he manages, feeling you sucking at his throat, feeling Ada’s body pressed up against his back, her hands wandering his chest.
You sure you’re alright with this? you’d asked before you all drove to the motel, smiling that dazzling smile of yours.
Leon, in truth, hadn’t been quite sure. Not because he didn’t want you both, but because no way in hell was this happening to a nobody like him. How did he catch your attention from the crowd? How did you actually seem to enjoy his shitty jokes and poor attempts at flirting? How did Ada appear and seem miraculously alright with him kissing you, her partner? It was all too good to be true. Some part of him knew that. Another part knew that he shouldn’t be doing this. Just as he and his fellows shouldn’t have gone to Lizzie’s in the first place.
Last night of freedom, they’d insisted. Last chance to go there and get your cherry popped.
Because people like him didn’t go to places like Lizzie’s. Or, they shouldn’t. Not for the ethics of it, though that should have been a factor, maybe. Rather, because the Night City Police Department and gangs didn’t exactly mix well. Neither did badges and mercenaries. It was why he’d lied to you, even if he’d felt bad about it. It wasn’t a local college that he’d just graduated from. Wasn’t a diploma he’d gotten, but rather, a badge. Maybe you’d understand. Maybe he’d tell you, eventually, if this ended up being more than a one night stand.
He hoped it would be, however foolish that thought was. It was foolish to have left the bar with you and Ada at all, in truth. But he trusted you. Dumb move, maybe, but he did.
Maybe it was the genuine way you’d looked at him before you all got in the car. The way you’d given him an out. He should have taken it. Instead, he’d nodded. I’m sure.
Maybe he’d spoken too soon, because as your teeth graze his skin, he’s not quite sure he’s going to survive what’s to come.
But what a way to go.
“Oh, I think he likes you,” Ada hums, amused, her breath hot against Leon’s ear as she pulls his jacket off his shoulders. “Don’t you?” she asks him, and he can only nod.
Of course he likes you.
Since he heard you sing the first few notes of your song, he’s nursed a suckerpunch crush on you. One that he’d been fully prepared to write off as puppy love and expect nothing to come of it. And now, here you were, kissing your way back up his throat.
His thoughts aren’t enough for Ada, though. She bites at his earlobe, tugging on it before she speaks again. “Come on, handsome. We can’t hear you.”
She has a voice like smoke, and Leon can’t help but do as she asks. “Yes,” he nods again. “I like . . . both of you.”
That earns him a laugh from you and Ada both. “I like you too,” you murmured, finding his lips once more. Leon doesn’t hesitate to kiss back, and Ada hums a laugh in his ear.
“Then maybe you should show him how much you like him,” she suggests, and after Leon gives his approval, it’s all he can do not to moan as you sink to your knees in front of him. You put on a show before, at the bar, and you do the same thing now, looking up at him as you undo his belt, his pants . . .
He’s aching by the time you free him, your lips pushing his shirt up so you can kiss at his belly and then down. Ada helps you without needing to be asked, tugging the shirt up. Leon catches up and lifts his arms, leaving himself mostly bare. No intensive cyberware chipped into his skin, no modifications besides the blue streak he’s dyed in his hair and a long-closed piercing hole in his ear. Just him. He barely has any time to be nervous about any of that before he feels your lips at the tip of him.
He might as well be a goner, then.
Your tongue runs up him in a smooth motion, and Leon’s head falls backwards, nearly headbutting Ada behind him. “I’m so sorry!” he insists, nearly stopping to turn and make sure she isn’t hurt, but the woman keeps him in place, shaking her head.
“It’s alright,” she reassures him. She brushes her lips against his cheek as you set to work, silent as she watches you take Leon in your mouth. She seems pleased, but Leon is a little too far gone to notice, his heart hammering as he struggles to figure out what to do with his hands. Should he grab your head? Reach back for Ada? He doesn’t know, and ends up just clenching his fists at his sides, watching in awe as your lips part and ease around him.
“Fuck-” he chokes out, glad for Ada supporting him, her silky dress pressed up against his back as her hands trace up his chest.
“Doesn’t it feel good?” she whispers to him, like she’s proud of your efforts.
“Oh god yeah,” he nods, knowing that she likes hearing his words.
Your hands run up his thighs, one finding purchase on his ass, pulling him closer as you bob your head.
He gets lost in watching you, letting you guide him into moving until he’s thrusting his hips in time with you. It’s too much, too good, and Leon can’t look away as your eyes lock on him. You may be the one on your knees, but he’s completely surrendered to you and Ada both. Ada, who, as Leon gasps, reaches up and grasps his chin, craning his head back towards her. Her eyes glow blue as she makes him look at her, his cheeks flushed and his lips parted as he pants. Ada locks eyes with him in that moment, the flickering blue glow like a neon lure. Leon doesn’t even get to lean in, though, before Ada kisses him, her lips trapping the sound of his moan.
He’s trapped between the two of you, a dual endeavor that he can only get lost in. At last, he reaches up, one hand on the back of your head, the other winding through Ada’s dark hair.
He won’t last. Not like this. Not as you take him all the way and his eyes nearly roll back into his head. Only then does he push you away, a little too hasty as he separates from Ada. “Wait-” he gasps, looking between the two of you.
Concern flashes across your eyes, but Leon quickly assuages it.
“I can’t be the only one feeling good,” he says, cracking a soft and breathless smile. He wouldn’t feel right about letting the two of you give him so much attention.
By the way your eyes sparkle, he knows you appreciate the idea. “You got a point,” you grin, giving him a few last kisses before rising to your feet. “What do you have in mind?”
Ah.
That much, Leon hadn’t really considered.
He looks between the two of you, suddenly dumbstruck once again. He’s never done this before. Well, not with two people. This is something straight out of a braindance that he’s only ever imagined experiencing for real. It’s too much and you’re both there waiting for him and-
“I have an idea,” Ada suggests, rescuing him from his confusion.
So, a few moments later, she’s kissing you as she and Leon work together to rid you of your outfit. Not that there’s much to remove. Leon can’t help but take in the sight of you; each inch of skin bared is a gift in and of itself, one that he drinks in as you stand before him at last. He takes in every detail he can in the dim light. The lines of any cyberware on you, the little imperfections that make you, well, you. He’s honored and overwhelmed and that’s even before Ada guides his hands towards you.
At the same time his skin touches yours, his heart pounds as Ada pulls you in for a bruising kiss. It’s a heated thing, one that makes clear the attraction between the two of you. Leon catches tongues tangling together, and the sight is enough he feels he might combust.
It isn’t long, though, before Ada parts from you and guides you towards Leon instead. She steps aside and Leon lets you walk him back, your mouth on his and your tongue slipping out to dip between his lips. His knees hit the back of the bed and he falls all too willingly, his back meeting the shiny pink tiger-print sheets. It’s not the kind of place where he’d usually choose to be with someone, but tonight isn’t the kind of night he usually has, either.
His inhibitions are long since gone as you crawl over him on the bed, your lips meeting his again, your hand moving between his legs.
He’s so caught up in the moment, he barely registers Ada moving in behind you, one arm wrapping around you to play where you’ve yet to receive attention. You moan into Leon’s mouth, and he swears it’s almost as good to hear as your singing. Almost .
Ada whispers something into your ear - Leon can’t hear quite what it is - and you nod. She kisses up the side of your neck before she leaves, allowing you to put all your attention on Leon. Allowing him to move his hand to take Ada’s place. You hum as he touches you, and fuck, there’s no better incentive to keep going than that. His hand, his fingers, his movements become more bold, his breath leaving him in desperate pants as he touches you. Trying to give you a fraction of what he’s been given so far. Your forehead presses against his as the kiss breaks, your eyes finding his in a way that’s far, far too intimate.
Then Ada returns, her fingers wet with something. Leon nearly asks where she got the lube from, but he imagines that a motel like this one has things prepared for all kinds of clandestine meetings. Or maybe Ada is just more prepared than he thought.
Either way, she reaches down and Leon’s face goes bright red as he watches her slide a finger into you. Then two. His hand falters for a moment, and you laugh amidst your sighs. “Come on, Leon,” you say, your voice sparking with challenge. “Don’t stop now.”
He does as you ask. How could he refuse? His hand and Ada’s work in harmony, and you close your eyes, shivering above him on the bed. You rock yourself back against Ada’s hand, kissing at Leon’s neck as you move.
At least, you did until Ada guided you up and away, making you crane your neck to kiss her, just as she’d done with Leon. Again, Leon could only watch as the two of you kissed, hearing the panting breaths you exchanged. Seeing the way you clung to each other. His breath caught in his throat as he saw you unzip Ada’s dress, letting it fall to the floor, leaving her in a black lingerie set that was, frankly, too perfect. All of her is too perfect. She has to have had some realskinn installed over cyberware, because no one is that perfect. He almost felt like he’d intruded on a private moment until Ada pulled away from your lips and reached for Leon, perfectly manicured fingers tracing his jawline. “I think he wants you,” she said, her lips trailing along your jaw.
She was telling true. Leon couldn’t help but stare at both of you, a sentiment that you seemed to share. “Only if I can have both of you,” you said, leaning into Ada, mouthing at her neck.
The pale woman hummed, smiling and shaking her head. “Greedy of you.”
“Hey,” you raised a brow, pulling away with a grin, “it’s my night. First show at Lizzie’s and all that, I think I deserve a reward.”
Ada made a face, one of soft amusement, but nodded. “Alright then. Lie down.”
You grin, not needing to be told twice. You kiss her on the lips, then do as she says, beginning to settle yourself on the edge of the bed. Leon watches you as you move beside him, very nearly following before he looks up at Ada once more. The smile she wore only moments before is gone, something in her eyes that Leon cannot place.
He worries for a moment. He doesn’t know her - hell, he barely knows you - but he feels concern anyway. Fear that this might be making her uncomfortable. “Ada,” he speaks up, breaking the magic of the moment much against his own will. “Are you sure this is okay?”
Dark eyes turn towards him, and there’s just a moment of indecision. Conflict. He can’t blame her, he supposes. She’s letting a stranger sleep with her partner. Leon very nearly feels wrong for even being here - but Ada shakes her head anyway. “It’s more than okay, handsome,” she promises and he finds nothing in her voice to suggest otherwise. “It’s nothing we haven’t done before.”
“Trust me,” you pipe up, sitting up a little on the bed, your hand over Leon’s more reassuring than it has any right to be, “if she wasn’t okay with you being here, she’d have kicked your ass to the curb back at the bar.”
That much, Leon believes easily. Ada doesn’t seem like the type of woman to shy away from defending her wants.
“Alright. I just . . . I’m sorry, I’ve never done anything like this before.”
For the first time all night, Ada’s expression softens. Yours does too, and you speak first, squeezing his hand. “You’re doing great,” you reassure him. “Better than most, honestly.” He believes that well enough, too. “Don’t worry. You want to stop, we stop. Simple as that.”
Ada watches carefully, but any worries she might have, Leon disarms when he shakes his head. “Don’t wanna stop,” he admits, bashful despite himself. “Not now.”
You smile, then, leaning up and sealing your lips to his. That’s really all he needs.
So, with the dual reassurance, he lets himself be guided to the edge of the bed, positioned between your legs. Ada takes up a position at his back once more, whispering what you like in his ear. He can feel her skin against his, the lines of cyberware pressing against him, her hands over yours, guiding them to Leon’s hips.
She lets him set his own pace, but you? Your legs wrap around his hips as your hands move up to his arms, all but dragging him towards you. Your eyes find Leon’s as he feels himself press in and oh good god he hadn’t been prepared for this.
He whines and you groan and Ada soothes her hands over his back as he presses in and in and in until at last he can go no further. His hands rest on either side of you, clutching at those stupid motel covers, his lips parted once more. You lean up and kiss him, eager to start, it seems.
Leon sure as hell isn’t going to disappoint you.
So, he starts to move his hips, forgetting himself as he feels not only the warmth of you around him, but the warmth of Ada at his back. She doesn’t kiss his neck anymore, she just remains there, watching as Leon sets a slow, steady pace.
When the kiss ends, though, you seem to want her more involved than that.
“You look lonely over there,” you pant, reaching one hand towards her.
Ada doesn’t seem to need convincing, either.
Of all the things Leon has seen in his life, watching her strip the black panties off her hips and climb over you on the bed is one that he thinks will be the end of him. She takes up her position without much hesitation, framing your face between thigh-high stockings. She doesn’t even take off her heels, and as far as Leon is concerned, that only adds to the utter mind-shattering sight as she lowers herself.
You don’t wait, either, your tongue reaching out to taste her as Leon thrusts into you, and that’s when it really hits him.
He’s sharing a bed with two beautiful strangers he met at the bar. He’s in a scenario that should be impossible, honestly, but damn if you don’t feel good squeezing him and look even better as you reach up, wrapping an arm around Ada’s thigh to hold her down on your face. She closes her eyes for a moment, sighing as you work, and all Leon can do is stare.
When those dark eyes open again, Leon doesn’t stop, and the two of them end up locked in a moment of equal exchange, a shared space where only the feeling of you seems to matter.
Leon groans as your hips move against his, and his mind all but going blank. He picks up the pace, the room fading away. No cheap decorations, no stains best left uninvestigated. Nothing but the heat of you, the sound of your muffled moans and Ada’s panting breaths.
And through it all . . . god, he can’t look away from her.
She holds his gaze too, like they’re both stuck there, caught immobilized. Like she’s deciding something, he realizes.
Whatever it was, she eventually finds the answer to her internal question and reaches for him. “Touch me, handsome,” she commands, reaching for his hands and placing them deliberately on her bare hips. Letting him feel each undulation as she moves atop you.
So he does as she asks yet again, his hands traveling up her body, feeling the smooth skin, the curves of muscle, the slope of her neck . . . he’s leaning in. He knows it. She makes another decision, and then she’s leaning in, too. He’s breathing heavy as he moves, taking one hand away from her to hold your hips. Faster and faster, him and Ada both. Your hand moves up to tease between Ada’s legs and she moans. Leon does the same, the hand at you hip moving between your legs. He whimpers when he feels himself getting close and god, he can’t help himself.
Ada’s lips are soft against his, and whatever reservations she displays in that initial kiss quickly fade. She kisses him harder, a hand in his hair, her tongue in his mouth.
He hears you moan from between Ada’s legs. Feels his own body tensing. “I’m-” each word is a struggle because he can’t think. It’s been so long and he never, ever thought-
But it doesn’t matter what he thought, because in that moment, he’s with the two of you. The two of you, who both hold on to him as best you can as he cries out, his hands dropping to the mattress once more to steady himself as pleasure hotwires his whole body. It’s too much, his eyes squeezing shut as he shudders, weeks and months of tension washing away for just a moment as he finally just exists. Pleasure is all that matters for a few blissful seconds, and the fact that he’s sharing it with someone who has such soul in them - someone who is being shared with him, in turn.
You follow Leon over the edge a moment later as he remembers he’s not alone in his bliss. His hand picks up the pace and you squeeze your legs around him, grinding into him until your release finds you. The moan you give is trapped between Ada’s thighs as the beautiful woman watches you finish. She sighs, still rocking against you.
Through his momentary haze, thick as smog, Leon sees Ada try to rise from you, but your arms hold her in place. The woman above you makes a sound, as close to a whine as Leon thinks she can manage, and ultimately decides to stay in place.
Leon doesn’t want to leave you to do all the work yourself, so he leans in. His hands reach up, a little nervous, trying to help. To feel her. He’s sure he made the right choice when her own hands come to rest over his, holding him against her skin. She lets him kiss her, and before long Leon’s lips capture her own moan as, at last, she shivers atop you.
She pants when it’s done, but Leon can see you still lapping at her, not stopping until, at last, Ada disentangles herself from you and sits off to the side of you.
Now that he can finally see your face, Leon can only smile at how utterly pleased with yourself you look, your lips shiny and pulled into a wide smile.
“Satisfied?” Ada asks, looking down at you with a genuine affection.
You nod, and Leon sighs, glad, as you speak. “Ohhh yeah. Definitely.” You wipe your mouth on the back of your hand as you answer. Leon might as well be swooning as the other hand runs up and down his back. The smile you give him, one shared between him and Ada both, is one he never, ever wants to forget.
You were stunning up on that stage, surrounded by lights. Now, though? You might be the most incredible thing he’s ever seen and he can barely look away.
Ada is more reserved, nodding with a look Leon can’t quite read. “Good.”
Then, with that, she moves to get off the bed.
“Mm, where do you think you’re going?” you ask, your hand stilling on Leon’s back.
Ada’s expression quickly brightens to a more sparkling look. “To the bathroom to get cleaned up. Then I have to go.”
Leon frowns at that, but then, so do you. “No no no, you ain’t gettin’ out of this that easy-”
“This was your night, remember?” Ada points out, her tone more adoring than Leon had heard so far. It almost makes him feel less nervous about Ada’s sudden and impending departure. “Take the night to play,” she says, standing from the bed, her hips swaying as she makes her way to the bathroom. “I appreciate being included, but your new friend looks like he wants more of your attention.”
That’s all she says before the door slides open and closed, and she disappears behind it.
Before Leon can even really think about it, you’re turning your attention back towards him. “You alright?” you ask, grinning like some cheshire cat. “Know this isn’t probably how you thought your night was gonna go-”
“It definitely wasn’t,” Leon admits, laughing a little breathlessly. “But I’m . . . I’m good. Really good.”
Of course, there’s one concern on his mind, and he speaks more quietly then so she might not hear him.
“She’s not mad, is she?”
You catch his meaning immediately, looking up and over at the closed door. “Nah. Ada’s not one for staying the night,” you shrug. “Even when it’s just the two of us, she usually deltas before the sun’s up.” You’re casual enough about it that he believes you. At least enough not to feel too much concern.
“You two are . . . thank you. For letting me . . .” he feels nervous even saying it, even though the deed is done.
That fact makes you smile and laugh, your hand coming up to brush at the hair hanging over his eyes, toying with the streak of blue in it. “Thank you for joining. And for liking my music.”
Leon hums as you guide him down to kiss you once more, his eyes closing and his mouth curving into a gentle smile.
He wants to ask if he can hear more of that music. To see if you’ll play for him again, if he’ll see you and Ada again. The question gets caught in his throat, though. Stuck before it can be fully realized. He was lucky enough to even have a night like this, he wouldn’t dare to dream that there could be more.
“I meant what I said, by the way,” you murmured to him a moment later, though, and it seems he doesn’t even have to dream at all. “I’d love to play you some more of my music sometime. Like every asshole with a guitar that you know.”
Leon doesn’t even laugh at the joke because, frankly, he’s too high on hope to risk something that might fuck it all up.
“I would love that.”
You really do have an incredible smile. “Good.”
“Was this payment enough to hear that music?” he asks.
You just shrug and he knows what you’re going to say even before you speak.
“To start.”
The light flickers over the sink. There’s spiderweb cracks in the glass. A fractured image staring back at her.
Even cheap motel furnishings had something to say, seemed like.
No. This isn’t a mirror programmed to spit compliments or harsh truths. Just a broken piece of glass. It’s her conscience doing the talking, weighing on her heavy as she hears laughter in the motel room just outside that door.
You like him. That much is obvious, and Ada can’t blame you. Leon is sweet. Handsome. A good soul - a damned rare thing in Night City.
He would learn better soon.
Best he learn at her hands, and not someone else’s.
That’s what she tells herself as she steps back, an invisible neural switch activating. Her eyes glow blue once more as information comes to life, all spelled out for her eyes only. Then, pieces of her skin glow too. Her hips, her thighs, her chest and cheek . . . an artwork glowing against her realskinn, one inked unknowingly by two pairs of hands.
She was only interested in one of those pairs, though.
Ada disregarded your prints. Swiped the ID away. It was the new touch that she needed. The one that belonged to a kind young man who’d merely been enamored with you. A man with a newly earned badge tied to his name - one that Ada had discovered in the milliseconds it took to complete a facial scan.
The rest had been harder to obtain.
Facial scan.
Retinal scan.
Fingerprints.
Biometric profile construction complete: Leon S. Kennedy.
A loading bar in her heads-up display filled in, the fingerprints highlighted on her skin fading. Even as she turned the water on, washing herself off, cleaning up her makeup and smoothing down her hair, she didn’t feel clean.
Never really did, in Night City.
Still . . . a girl had to make a living.
Next Chapter (Coming soon!)
Chapter Index
#leon kennedy x reader#ada wong x reader#leon kennedy x you#ada wong x you#leon kennedy x reader x ada wong#resident evil#cyberpunk 2077#resident evil x cyberpunk 2077#leon kennedy smut#ada wong smut#no y/n#gender neutral reader
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CW: Incest, noncon, G/G, miniaturization
I
As April looked out the window, she fancied herself stepping out of the plane and walking on the blanket of clouds. She knew it was, of course, impossible: no matter how solid those clouds looked, she would just plummet down, fall for ages. Shit, it might be a good alternative to returning home. It occurred to her that she was probably the first member of her family to have such fantasies, and not just because she was the first one to ride a plane- her mother, her tens of cousins… they lacked the imagination for such dreaming. To them the world was small, immediate, obvious. It stopped at face value. They would try to walk on clouds. They looked so solid, after all.
His brother Kevin, on the other hand, did have an imagination. He had imagined he could escape their hole of a town by dealing meth. Too bad he didn’t have the intelligence to make it happen. Kevin had lasted one week as a street dealer, the very bottom of the criminal ladder before the cops busted him. Well, at least he had tried.
April knew she should feel guilty for thinking such things, but after two years in College, surrounded by some of the most brilliant scientific minds in the country, the evidence was too great to ignore. She was, objectively, different. Smarter. Better. There was a reason that by age twenty she was on a full-ride scholarship, making huge strides in fields her mother had no hope of comprehending; that same mother, by age twenty, had managed to get knocked up twice, by two different lowlifes who vanished the second the little stripes on the tests turned blue. Birth control was, apparently, a concept far too complex for her mother to grasp.
Fuck. Why was April even going back home? Guilt, obviously. She had skipped two holidays in a row, and her mother had turned on the waterworks to an unbearable degree.
April was smart enough to realize part of her spite came from fear. It wasn’t a rational thing, she knew, but she could feel it in her chest. She was different from her family, sure, but she was different from her colleagues as well. A part of her felt out of place, as if those men and women from comfortable backgrounds could smell the white trash inside her veins. Nobody said anything. Nobody looked at her in a weird way. But still… April felt that should one of them scratch her, the thin veneer she wore of an “admirable scientist” would flake off and reveal just another trashy blonde wearing daisy dukes and lounging by a 7-11 every weekend, getting wasted on cheap whiskey, just like most of her former highschool classmates.
Her mind wandered to the secret hidden in her luggage. Dr. Mill’s words echoed in her head. It’s too valuable to take out of the lab, April. And besides, it’s bad for you to take work home. Trust me, you don’t want to burn out. You need to rest.
Good advice for anyone else, but not for her. What was she supposed to do for two weeks in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere? Watch reality TV with her mom and listen to her whining about her oh-so-hard life? Catch up with assholes who peaked in highschool and whose peak had been a molehill? Drink at the one bar in town and watch dumb fucks trying to pick her up by extolling the virtues of their trucks?
No. No. Better to play the hermit, solidify her family reputation as a cold hearted bitch, and get some work done. Work, she knew, no one had a chance to understand.
II
June grabbed another chip. God, she was baking inside her car, but the AC was busted and she couldn’t afford to get it fixed- and besides, it was worth it to see her girl. She missed April so much, in a way she couldn’t fully put into words. She missed her in her body, in her chest. It was like having a stone stuck inside her and no way to get it out. That’s the closest she could come to explaining it.
She had been missing her daughter for a long time, to be fair. At some point her baby girl had just… changed. Maybe when she had turned twelve or so. Suddenly June couldn’t understand what April was talking about, or what her interests were, or why she looked so miserable all the time. Sure, adolescence was a part of it, but there was something else in the mix. June tried so, so hard to be a good mom. Two jobs, extra gigs, trying to help April with school, trying to teach her to be a good person. That was all she could do, and she figured she must have done something right. June didn’t fully get why or how but April had managed to get into a good school, for free. June was so, so proud. She was also proud of some other things, awards and grants and such, that she didn’t really comprehend. Her girl was bright. Too bright, maybe. Maybe that’s why she was so bitter all the time. Too much thinking was like too little thinking, June figured. Neither was good. But she did try to talk to April, to bridge that gap. Couldn’t say it was working, though.
When she saw April coming out of the airport, her heart lit up for a second. Then she immediately thought: girl sticks out like a frog on fries. She couldn’t help it. April looked beautiful, sure, but beautiful in a weird way. She dressed like someone on TV, from New York or something. The other girls in town weren’t going to like that. Putting on airs was frowned upon. But fuck it. Her daughter was here. Home. Finally.
They hugged tight. Actually, June hugged April tight. April sort of… took it. June realized she had left sweat stains on her daughter’s blouse and felt ashamed. She couldn’t say why. It was like she was looking less at a daughter and more at a boss or something.
The small talk felt icky. The drive to the house seemed to go on forever. June felt guilty about it. She tried to find something that would spark April’s interest, but… she had nothing to offer. That was a rotten feeling, having nothing to offer her daughter. And the drive only reminded June that she had experienced that sinking feeling for a long time.
III
April took a deep look inside herself. Yep, still not used to it. Her room still was unbearably, overwhelmingly pink. She had made a little bet with herself that she would get accustomed to it in a few days- and a week into her visit, it still bothered her. Sure, it was her childhood room and she had been too busy to redecorate, but… her mother had kept it exactly as it had been, dolls and everything. April had never liked dolls, and she still remembered having to pretend to be happy when her mom gave her a big doll house for Christmas- one, April knew even back then, they couldn’t afford.
At least she had managed to move the project forward. Nothing major, just a few adjustments, just slight improvements- but given the magnitude of her work, the sheer potential within it, even a small upgrade was monumental. It made her dizzy, sometimes, knowing she would change the world. She stared at the horrid ceiling. It still didn’t feel real, coming from this place and being on the verge of-
The scream from downstairs launched her out of bed. Her mind went to the worst possible scenario, and she hated that she knew, instantly, what had happened. Fuck. No, no, no. She flew down the stairs, blaming herself for leaving the device out in the open. What the fuck had she been thinking? How had she not foreseen the obvious, incredibly stupid, possibility of…
“April! April, what the hell?”
April looked around. The pile of clothes by the table told her everything she needed to know. Her mother was leaping, screaming her tiny, tiny lungs out. Twin flames erupted inside the young scientist. It worked! It worked exactly as she said it would work, and it had worked outside of a lab setting, out in the real world! All her calculations, all her experiments, all her theories had been proven correct by the diminute, shouting woman on the floor. This was not just a success, but a world-changing event. Logistics, storage, transportation, all would be revolutionized. She could imagine aid, medicine, clothing delivered to those who needed it- and, of course, there were the potential commercial uses…
On the other hand, there was the rage. This… woman, this absolute idiot, this stain on her own daughter’s DNA had just risked everything April had worked for. The sleepless nights, the hours upon hours of effort, the accumulated prestige, the grants- should the device be damaged in any way…
“April! Help me! What happened? I went to use your phone…”
Phone? The device looked nothing like a phone. Surely her mother couldn’t be this stupid, could she?
“Mom… Did you think that was a phone? Why?”
“I don’t know! Phones change all the time, with new models and all that stuff! I just wanted to look up a recipe and now… what the hell happened to me? Why is everything so… huge?”
April took a deep breath, trying to hold back the anger boiling inside her chest.
“Mom, things are not huge. You’re… small, ok? The space between the nuclei of your atoms and the electrons was compressed via… it doesn’t matter. You’re not going to get it. The bottom line is…”
“Don’t talk to me like I’m stupid! I may not have your fancy education but you don’t have the right to…”
The right? April could feel herself starting to shake. She had the right to say whatever the fuck she wanted to any moron, family or not, especially if that particular moron had just risked her entire life’s work! Where did this person get off, thinking she deserved respect?
“You fucking…”
“April! Don’t you use that language with me! I’m still your mother, and…”
“And what? And fucking what, mom? What the fuck are you going to do? Try to make me feel guilty? Hold me back like you always have? Drag me to watch one of your braindead reality shows? Why? What gives you the fucking right? What have you achieved? Ever? The only thing you’ve done worth a shit is getting knocked up with me. Fuck, even my name is a testament to your tiny, mediocre imagination! I’m April because you’re June! What, was February too hard to spell?”
Suddenly, April realized something. Looking down at this diminutive being, finally looking as small as her mind, getting everything off her chest, she felt… good. She felt free, for once. Powerful. Why, she could just take a little step and crush her mother under her foot, feel her wiggling between her toes, trying in vain to escape. It was an intoxicating fantasy, and April decided not to delve into its morality.
“April… how can you say such things? I raised you… I busted my ass for you! And now that I need your help…”
“No. We’re not doing this. It’s over. The pity party? Not happening. I’m over feeling guilty about the fact that I am better than you. And I am! I’m smarter, I’m younger, I’m more accomplished and I won’t apologize for it!”
“April, you need to fix this!”
“Oh, I need to fix the mess your own stupidity made? You’re such a fucking child! You know what? If you want to be a manipulative baby so badly, I’ll treat you like a baby.”
June couldn’t even think of anything to say before her own daughter, large as a building, imposing as the full moon, leaned forward, her hand darkening everything like an eclipse.
April looked at the small figure in her hand. It was pathetic, crying and screaming. All it would take would be a squeeze, and… She could do anything to this person. Anything at all. She didn’t seem human, and April took the time to turn her around, to look at every inch of her skin, almost as if she was admiring a particularly realistic doll. Had this… creature been the mother that had caused her so much heartache? How had she allowed herself to give energy and time to someone who had always been so… small? In the end, all the device had done was to give her mother’s body the right size for her mind, for her relevance in the world. She had always been just insignificant, and April felt silly for ever having felt any sort of responsibility towards her. Fuck it. She wanted to be an annoying child? She would be one.
“Well, mom, take a deep breath. I’m taking you where you belong.”
“What-”
April let her tiny mother slide between her breasts, and smiled. It was a rather delightful sensation, almost tickling. April squeezed her tits together, just for a bit. At least that was one good thing she had gotten from dear mommy: a fairly large chest. As she walked back up to her room, she let herself enjoy the way the vibrations from her mother’s screams felt on her skin. Well, if her mom could scream, she could breathe. That was all she deserved. April lingered for a moment in front of the doll house, pushing her breasts together a couple of times for good measure. Finally, she picked the tiny woman from under her top, and placed her inside the house.
“There. Isn’t that nice? The house you always dreamed of! And…”
April started tossing old dresses from her childhood drawers, kept by some forsaken reason by her mother. It should be there, somewhere under… Ah. Bingo. She skipped to the dollhouse, opened the small bag in her hand and let the tiny clothes rain down on her diminutive mother.
“Now you can dress like a proper lady! Isn’t that nice? Shit, those clothes are better than anything you ever got me!”
“April, stop, please, I’m begging you!”
God, it felt good. Like things were in their proper place. Or rather in their proper size. April had always towered over this woman, after all. And there was something intoxicating, heady in the sheer sense of power she felt- for once, she was playing the role she was born to play. She chose a dress from the pile, one advertised, if memory served, as “Prom Night Mindy”. She got Mindys and Katies and Jennys- never Barbies. Dollar store dolls from a dollar store mom.
“Don’t you like this one? It’s blue! Your favorite color! Put it on.”
“Have you gone crazy? No!”
“Fine. Have it your way.”
In a flash, April held her mother in her hand. She looked so pathetic, so silly. Yet there was something… tasteful in her proportions, something April had never noticed behind the years of resentment. June was a beautiful woman- one that made a beautiful doll. Almost absentmindedly, April carefully squeezed the minuscule woman’s breasts. Quite firm still, she realized. Her mother squirmed and spoke in vain. April was almost in a trance, like she was seeing a toy for the first time. She flicked her finger, striking her mother’s ass. It probably hurt quite a bit, but April didn’t care. The way her finger bounced off those tiny buttocks was both comical and quite relaxing. Maybe she could keep her around, use her as a fidget toy, flick her now and then while working on important things.
“Put me down right now! What’s come over you?”
April took the dress.
“Okay, mom. Arms up, come on. Let’s see how you look in proper clothing, for once”
“No! I won’t…”
“Mom… I don’t think you understand. I can just close my hand and that’s it. The end. Vanished from this Earth. Who would even imagine there’s a tiny body in the bottom of the trash? You’ll never tell me what to do, do you understand? Now, hands up.”
June could feel her daughter was serious. She was capable of doing it. That realization alone was enough to both terrify her and break her heart. Slowly, she lifted her arms, and felt the coarse fabric on her skin. April put her back inside the pink dollhouse.
“Not bad! Give me a little twirl”
“It’s itchy…”
“Well, then maybe you should have bought better dolls with better clothes, huh mom? But I have to say, it does look good on you! Now, twirl!”
June felt ridiculous. She spun and the dress danced upwards. The size wasn’t quite right, and it ended up wrapping itself around her waist.
“Oh, mom! Looks like it’s a bit too short for you! Or maybe you just can’t help yourself and like flashing your stuff around town! What would Ken say? Well, I don’t think he would mind. He doesn’t have any… equipment. Not that you ever bought me a Ken, anyway. But you? Anatomically correct! Now, let’s get you out of that dress, find you a prettier one.”
April tossed the dress after ripping it off her mother’s body. Once again, she felt herself drawn to the beauty she held in her hands.
“Anatomically correct indeed…” she muttered.
Driven by curiosity and the pulsing sensation that grew and grew more powerful between her legs, April exposed with little effort her mother’s most private parts, keeping her thighs open with two fingers.
“April, what… What are you…?”
She tasted her mother like a delicacy. It was, April had to admit, a rather delightful experience, a bit like caviar- a small blast of flavor, mixed with salty sweat, topped off with a heady sniff of pheromones. April licked absentmindedly, her mind gone. It was… relaxing, in a weird way. Like smoking, she supposed. Something to soothe oral anxiety…
Suddenly, she felt her mom squirming, legs trying to close together, body contorting, screams muffled by those tiny hands. April couldn’t comprehend what happened, and it took her a few seconds to realize the simple, obvious fact.
“You came!”
June covered her face in shame. Her daughter was right. Torn between the still lingering sensation and the desire to cry her guilt away, she shook. It was wrong on so, so many levels… but her body had betrayed her, made her explode for her own daughter’s gigantic tongue…
“Oh no. Don’t you get all emotional now. You miniscule slut! Cumming like that because of your own daughter! Aren’t you one tiny whore? Well, I hope you enjoyed it! You know, I always wanted a doll with some kind of action, but I didn’t imagine this kind of action. But… this isn’t fair, is it? It’s not fair at all! You get to cum and I don’t? No, that won’t do!”
April tore her shorts and panties away, sat on the floor and opened her legs. She was soaked already; a fact she took in with an almost scientific coldness. This was certainly an application she hadn’t predicted for her invention, but then again, the greatest discoveries were often accidents.
“What are you waiting for? You have hands and feet and a tiny tongue to explore every inch of my pussy! Don’t you get it? You have the chance to be the world’s best sex toy! Doing things, reaching places no dildo could ever stimulate! So, get to it!”
“Are you insane? I’ll never…”
“Oh, shut up. Do I need to crush you under my foot? Is that what you want? Didn’t think so. So, stop yapping for once and be useful!”
April didn’t let her mother answer. The woman had spoken enough for three lifetimes. She simply grabbed June and placed her between her legs. She quickly realized the threat had worked, and a myriad of sensations coursed through her body. Fuck, this was revolutionary.
She let her head fall back, her body relax and enjoy. Her mind drifted as her breath quickened. Pleasure mixed with dreams of what was to come. Nobel Prize. A new world, beget by her genius. Entire industries transformed.
And as for her mother… well, finally she was of some use. Nobody would miss her- and she’d look great in a tiny cage by her bed.
Did you enjoy this story? You can support my work and get access to the full library at patreon.com/prettynosferatu
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Okay I lied I do actually want to do something for the anniversary. (it won't be the anniversary by the time I post this but shhhhh)
It's not going to be turtle themed though. You guys remember last year when I made fun of rich people's houses? I'd like to do that again.
This...domicile comes to us from Camden, Maine, with seven bedrooms and six baths, tops out at 6,000 square feet and can be yours for a paltry two million.
They really wanted to show off that they had money for the fountain.
Also, is it just me or do rich people houses seem woefully cheap compared to regular people houses? Like, 2 mil is a lot, but if you do the math with the space and amenities they have-like, I highly doubt you could put three 2,000 sqft houses on this parcel of land and get one for 650k. Definitely not in Camden. I remember the first time we moved we looked at one house that was nearly 2 mil-for fun, even when we had money we didn't have that much money-and it was probably about half the size of this. And it was in suburban TC, not a ritzy summer colony. And had been built twenty years before, not the previous as this one was.
Plus this was 2008. The...particular economics of that year in regards to housing prices aside, two mil in 2008 is, uh...quite a bit more now.
So if you expand this picture, you'll see that there's Asian-esque map-looking things set into the wall, and Asian writing over the door. I think they're Chinese characters, but I'm not 100% certain. This entire house has a supposedly Asian theme. I have...things to say, but I'll hold off for now until I have more examples to show what I'm talking about.
Also I just can't with the stone choices. Kudos to them for actually trying to landscape though.
...
I mean, I will give them points for doing the complete inverse of a Lawyer Foyer. Those columns though. Like. When have those ever looked good outside a hotel lobby? When have they ever looked good inside a hotel lobby? How much dust does those bottoms collect? Why do they seemingly have hotel curtains as well?
Usually, columns like this are made of foam with a stone veneer, I think these are at least partially real. A lot of stuff in this house misses the 'cheap shit designed to look expensive' marker that defines McMansions, it looks genuinely decadent-it's just ugly as shit.
THEY HAVE TWO CHANDELIERS. ONE WASN'T ENOUGH FOR THEM, THEY HAD TO HAVE TWO MASSIVE CHANDELIERS TO PROVE THEIR DINGDONGS. AND THAT'S IN ADDITION TO THE FOYER CHANDELIER.
I like how they put the bar in directly next to the front door. Like they know you're going to walk in and will immediately need a drink.
Why is there this ugly gold runner everywhere? I feel like I'm in Trump Tower. Or a gourmet candy bar.
Yes I see the cabinet, no we're not going to talk about it right now. While I love seeing houses that actually have color in them, I'm just...the teal and pink is fine, but it's hard to pull off different variants of a color together. Teal and true blue, it's just...it doesn't work. And these guys have TVs on like every wall for some reason?
Mostly just including this picture to point out the safe on the floor. In the dining room. And to call attention to the weird goldish-bronze border that doesn't seem to start and end where it's supposed to.
Also, yes, these walls are entirely done in tile. It's like they wanted to do something other than the beige but couldn't decide what to go with so they just worked the kitchen tile through the rest of the house.
Speaking of the kitchen...
What
I. I don't. I. I. Why the sink-
????????!!!!
There's...I just don't. Like. You can't even pick a place to start.
The fact that they picked pretty much the busiest tile pattern known to man wouldn't have been such a big deal...if they hadn't tiled the inside and outside of the cabinets. And removed the doors to said cabinets. And hadn't picked a second, equally busy tile pattern to play against the first.
Actually, let's go back to the two tile patterns. Not only are they both way too busy to work with each other, they're both browns...but completely the opposite variants of brown. The lower pattern has more blacks and greys and even a bit of blue in it, while the border browns are warmer shades. You really can't mix warm and cool shades of the same color. It just doesn't look good.
And we have to talk about that counter. It looks somehow like the cheapest 90s shit you'd see in a roller rink or an ocean-themed Chuck E. Cheese, but also you know it cost ungodly amounts of money.
Why is it so thin? Why is the sink so deep in the island? Why is the recessed lighting lopsided?
And we're not even touching upon the floor. These people clearly did not understand feature elements. The floor, counter, and both sets of tile are all dueling for dominance, and we're the neglected child caught up in the custody battle sitting on the lawn with our bags. This kitchen was designed by someone who didn't care if god forgave them.
Oh okay, so we're just using those tiles throughout the entire house now. Fantastic.
That...counter is not beating the 90s cheese allegations.
Is it just me, or does the second chandelier look like it would clip your head on the way down?
No yeah, it is straight-up Right Fucking There. Completely unnecessary too, considering the plethora of recessed lighting. And they've somehow managed to make this hallway look busy despite having absolutely nothing on the walls.
I'm putting in three photos to show that these are in fact different rooms. I'm not including the other bedroom photos because I literally don't know if they're other bedrooms or just different angles of these bedrooms, because every bedroom is decorated exactly the same.
But this is what I meant when I called this house 'Asian-esque' earlier. Now, granted, I don't know a ton about modern architecture and design trends in Asia or among Asian-Americans, so I very much might be putting my foot in my mouth here and I fully deserve the ridicule if that is the case. But to me this doesn't feel like...legitimate. This feels like someone who wants to look cultured, who considers the Far East to be exotic and elegant and would unironically use the term Oriental to describe their style. It feels like they designed this without actually understanding anything about Asian art and architecture and had no desire to learn. It doesn't feel like one thing in particular, it feels like they took elements from Japanese, Chinese, and even Indian styles and gestured vaguely to all of them because they were too scared to commit.
You know, I'll give them credit, the blue does look nicer with the brown. It doesn't look good, but nicer.
Still the same lack of cabinet doors. And the same glow-in-the-dark bathroom counter. It took me a solid few seconds to find the sink there-and then I burst out laughing when I saw it.
I don't know why, but the stone plus that golden window insert makes me think Rocky Rococo.
WHY DOES THEIR GARAGE HAVE THE GRANITE FLOORING?!!
God, this is like my grandmother and her carpeted garage. But she has an excuse in that she doesn't give a fuck what you think.
I don't know why but this is fucking hysterical to me.
Also it doesn't look like there's a...door? To the garage? In Maine? Like, even if it's a heated garage, it's still going to be cold. And it's also dirty, like, you don't want bugs and car fumes wafting into your living spaces?
I haven't even mentioned the ceiling decoration or the crown molding. Or the fact that the crowd molding, doorways, and candy bar wrapper walls are all different shades of gold. And I'd like to keep it that way.
On a side note, what is up with all the recessed lighting? Not that they have it, but doesn't it seem like...a lot? Like, I feel like they could thin them out a bit, you're practically under hospital lights. People with recessed lighting, is this normal? I've only had it in one room of one house, but I don't remember it being this...dense. (I do remember my sister and I once knocked the glass out of the baffle while playing. that's how I learned that those things get really hot)
This is like a church basement if it was also The Backrooms.
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The Omaha Journal Star runs an obituary for Marshall Hall on their website. Short, unrevealing. The bigger death that day was of a grandmother, ninety-nine when she passed, beloved by twenty grandchildren, fixture at church, pillar of the community, and so on. In the print version of the paper Marshall Hall merited maybe two inches of grey space. Maybe just an inch.
"What are you doing?" Dean's tired and it doesn't come across mocking or nagging or pointed or—anything. He's folded onto the further bed, TV light playing across his face. "Got a job lined up?"
Some daylight scene on the show Sam hasn't been paying attention to and Dean's washed out paper-white. Too much like the hospital bed. Sam says, "Looking," which is vague enough that he could arguably not be lying, but Dean doesn't seem to care either way. He nods, eyes fixed on the television but who knows if he's taking it in, either.
Pale skin, pale lips. Sam's gut twists to look at him but they got the all-clear from the doctor—his heart, mechanically, is one hundred percent fine. If Sam asked Dean would say he was fine, too, and Sam would want to smack him except that Dean looks like he'd crack in half with any additional pressure. Although lately—Sam doesn't know. When they were kids he would've said he could predict every single dumb thing Dean would say and he'd make bets with himself sometimes on what'd come out next. His odds were better than even. After the years apart it's—different. Sometimes Dean gives him this look and Sam doesn't recognize him; sometimes Dean opens his mouth and what comes out is—not something Sam would've ever thought could be said, in their family. On this particular night he might ask, and Dean might say—anything.
The show goes to commercial. A Chevy dealer in the county over has offers you can't believe with zero cash down. Wells Fargo wants to extend you a line of credit with low APR. Dean rolls off the bed and goes into the bathroom and closes the door, quiet, and Sam looks at the cheap maple veneer and then goes back to the obituary.
Marshall Hall, 1979–2006. Beloved son, believer in justice and truth. Pursuing a JD; active in his community. No mention of a wife, or kids, or siblings. A 'celebration of life' to be held on the following Saturday. In lieu of flowers, his mother requests that donations be sent to the legal aid organization where Marshall volunteered his time. That's all that's fit to print, about Marshall Hall.
Sam's been to more funerals than most. He can imagine Marshall Hall's. Shocked relatives, gathering around the gray-faced mother. More-shocked friends and colleagues around his own age, most of them faced probably for the first time with that appalling and unavoidable truth—that it could come at any time. That any of them could be standing in their kitchens or riding their bike in the sun or just at work, doing their job, and death when it came was unspectacular and uncompromising and then—that was it. There had been a Marshall Hall and now there wasn't, and the people milling through whatever empty quiet house would be murmuring how it just seemed impossible, and how they'd just talked to him last week, and how could it be true? But it was, and it was impossible to go back to the world last week, when he'd been loud and bright and fierce and there, and each of them would have to face that in their own time, and worse, would have to look at the people standing in front of them and think—what if—?
When Dean comes out of the bathroom Sam's abandoned the laptop. "Thought you were going to fuse with that thing," Dean says.
"There'll be jobs to look for tomorrow," Sam says, and holds out a can of beer.
Dean squints at him. Comes over slow, and sits on the other bed, and when he takes the can he doesn't open it but just holds it between his two hands, looking at the top. White light on the side of his face pooling strange across his skin, his other eye so dark that it looks hollow, and Sam reaches for the remote and snaps the TV off so it's just—his brother, sitting there, in inadequate lamplight but at least not being dragged off to nightmares Sam can't currently stand.
"I was watching that," Dean says, and Sam says, "No, you weren't," and Dean looks up at him and opens his mouth and then closes it, and sighs.
"Dean," Sam says, and then hangs there, not sure how to say it—true. "I wish—man, I don't know. I wish it'd been different."
Dean's thumb runs around the aluminum rim of the can. When he looks up he looks into Sam's eyes, and then at his mouth, and then he sits back and his shoulders are a low curve and he shakes his head, eyes cutting off to some misery. Whether it's Layla or Marshall or Roy or some combination of all three—or something worse—Sam doesn't know, and the not-knowing's got this pit growing in his stomach. He puts his own beer down on the nightstand and reaches out and gets his hand on Dean's skin—grips the inside of his wrist, his thumb on the knob of bone. If he pressed hard enough he could feel Dean's heart beating but the warmth of skin is enough, for now.
"Hey," Sam says, raw.
Dean huffs. "Hey yourself," he says, and Sam doesn't know if it's wanted but he leans across the space between the beds and kisses Dean anyway—close-lipped, firm, his other hand under Dean's jaw so he can't duck away. Dean lets him. Return pressure, after a second, so Sam doesn't feel like he's kissing a lifeless thing. Sam breaks away with relief dumping down his spine and presses his temple to Dean's temple, and Dean turns in so his nose brushes Sam's cheek and lets him breathe the same air and then pushes him away, gentle. He meets Sam's eye and it's okay—well, it's not okay, but they are at least—and then he opens his beer, and heels back to sit up against the headboard of his own bed, and that's going to be it, probably, about this day, and this week, and Sam'll have to be content with that, or risk the terror of asking.
He sits back on his own bed and turns the TV back on. A cop show. It'll pass the time until they sleep. He wishes it had been different. Given how it was, he wouldn't have made a different choice. He opens his own beer, and sits in quiet with his brother.
#happy wincest wednesday#my writing#ww lottery#a random ficlet for episode 12#it really is a ponderer#sam's FURIOUS about sue-ann#but if he could've...? would he have...?#he justifies it real fast is all i'm saying
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"God, you don't even notice, do you?" Arielle said as they stood on the balcony, Lyons to their feet. Her eyebrows slightly furrowed, a layer of removed disdain on her words.
"I'm afraid not, Miss Halévy?" he asked her. He was used to her scorn, but this was different.
"You smell like you smoke," she answered. "Like a cheap backroom bar."
~
"Mister Bailey."
The other two stopped in their tracks.
"Well, either he's just found out something that is troubling regarding business ..." Arthur said.
"Or he's pissed with me," Robert added. They turned around as Tahir joined them.
"I think we have to talk about your habits," Tahir said, the thin veneer of politeness over it all.
"My habits?" Robert asked. "The fuck you've been hearing again."
"Hearing is not the sense that's concerned here." At least the friendlyness was dropped for unfeeling efficiency. "Your habits of tarring your lungs now make people think I smoke. This is getting ridiculous."
"... well, you are dating a smoker, Tahir ..." Arthur said. "Not that I also think that it could always be less, but ..."
"But what? Do you not mind, that you reek of nicotine against your will?"
"Well, I would, if I did but I'm certain someone would have told me if that was the case. I think you're forgetting that you're probably more exposed to it than me."
"Either way, I'm not stopping," Robert said and did so with a grin when he noticed Tahir's growing ire. "You're getting fag-free kisses, that's all we ever agreed on, handsome."
"Then a new deal is in order, because I'm not letting people think I'm an irresponsible sleazebag." Tahir stepped closer, his face barely removed from Robert. "You will get a grip on this, because either the fags go or I do."
#beablabbers#storie nostre#railey#arielle#arthur#tahir#robert#sooorry rereading same difference and I just loooove that storyline there
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Find out what the density of the foam is. The Upholstered furniture should have a seat foam density rating of at least 1.8 pounds or higher. Though the chair or sofa has removable seat cushions, unzip them and take a look inside as well to check for internal compartments in the foam that will stop it from settling.
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Apple A Day
It’s that time of year again. No, not the changing of the seasons, the beginning of football, or the month Green Day wants you to wake them up when it’s over. Nope. Tomorrow is the annual September announcement—drumroll, please—from Apple and the release of the next iPhone.
Not that Apple doesn’t let the rumor mill freely run and play with wild speculations for the nine months leading up to this. The iPhone16 will officially be announced tomorrow, but we probably already know everything there is to know. If anyone knows how to play the hype game, it is Apple.
The question is will people be impressed enough to plan on lining up at stores in a couple of weeks to replace their old phones.
I remember back in 2007 when the first iPhone was announced. Much to my current embarrassment, I roundly dismissed it as superfluous, wasteful, and overkill. I already had a phone, pocket camera, and calculator. Why would I want to replace all of them with an expensive new device? That first-gen iPhone had a list price of $499, which is laughably cheap compared to today’s models, but it was still a huge expense to duplicate everything else you already had.
I quickly saw the folly of my way, and was ready to hop in the queue a year later to get my hands on what has arguably become the most important device ever released. It has been imitated by others and with different operating systems. It has been improved upon by Apple each year, adding more bells and whistles to that shiny veneer. And it has been the one thing that has kept Apple stock and profits in the stratosphere.
Of course, as with any innovation well into its umpteenth iteration, you have to wonder exactly what they could possibly add to make this worth buying, especially if the older iPhone in your pocket or purse still works fine. With new phones costing more than $1500 at the top end of the product line, it better be good, even if your phone carrier is willing to float you a 30-month interest-free financing plan.
The trend in recent years has been toward less frequent replacements. As of last year, data showed that more iPhone owners are keeping their phones three years or longer before buying a new one. As for me, my iPhone 12 will be four years old this November. Yes, the battery is showing signs of decay, but I bring along a small power brick for those times when it starts to run low. Photos and videos are enormous battery sucks, and if you shoot like me, it doesn’t take long. That brick was a lifesaver in Costa Rica last year.
This year, though, I am betting the iPhone16 will be a runaway success, because there is one significant enhancement: the arrival of AI, or as they like to call it, Apple Intelligence. A rose by any other name, of course, smells the same, but it will be cool to have a handheld computer that is capable of creating text and images on the fly without having to log in to other websites.
Were it not for AI, I doubt that I would be ready to make a move, and I bet that is the same story for many. We need something big when the product is so expensive. Never mind inflation, economic uncertainties, and all the problems plaguing us these days.
Not many years ago, some people replaced their iPhones each year, just like a few decades ago, it wasn’t uncommon for motorists to line up to buy the latest new model every autumn. How else do you explain the Cadillac Ranch, a tribute to the auto industry’s ability to wow drivers with a slightly larger tail fin every year?
But cars are too expensive for that kind of frivolity today, unless you are made of money, and the same goes for iPhones. Marketers can only dangle new products successfully when there are both willingness and means. If either are in short supply—willingness because the new item truly is impressive, and means translating into ability to pay—then we won’t jump.
I guess we’ll all learn a bit more tomorrow, about ourselves, as well as Apple’s ongoing profitability. I’ll be watching.
Dr “But Can You Make The Camera Even Better?” Gerlich
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How to Find High Quality Furniture ?
When buying new furniture, anyone is faced with the same choice: do you go for something fast, cheap, and easy? Or something expensive that will be more durable? It can click here to learn more be tempting to choose something inexpensive in the moment, as you may want something as quickly as possible.
Types of Wood
There are different types of wood that can be used to make furniture. Ash, mahogany, oak, and walnut are just some of the most popular types of wood used in modern furniture. Furniture can either be solid wood or veneer, meaning less expensive wood is covered in a solid wood finish. Equal these options are used in high quality modern furniture and are typically durable and long lasting.
Watch Out for Particle Board
Particle board is another type of material used as a base for a lot of modern furniture. These is typically used in cheaper furniture, as it won't stand up to heavy use over a long period of time. This is made from an combination of wood pulp, plastics, and resin – not as solid or durable as solid wood or veneers. It's not typically used in high quality modern furniture.
Cushions and Upholstery
Depending on the type of furniture you're buying, you should check if the cushions can easily be removed from the upholstery. For thing likes armchairs, dining chairs, and even couches, you should be able to easily remove the cushion covers from the foam or down. Although this may seem like a small feature, it will mean way less of a headache in the future should you need to wash the covers or want to change their colour or material. Low quality furniture typically doesn't come with this option.
Glue, Nails, Screws, and Joints
There are many ways that furniture can be put together. Wood joinery, where notches are cut into wood pieces and fit together, and certain types of screws are often used by high quality furniture manufacturers to reduce the risk of cracking and sagging in furniture after long term use. Things like staples and nails are less desirable (depending on their location and function). Though you can visibly see adhesive like glue holding parts of the furniture together, this usually indicates lower quality furniture. You shouldn't be able to easily see any materials used to hold the furniture together, let alone if it's simple glue. Your furniture probably won't last very long!
Knots
Knots are natural in solid wood how ever, they are also the areas of the tree that are weaker than the rest. If your furniture, such as a table, has a lot of knots visible, it means that the wood is weaker than it would be if there were less knots. That is why much high-quality furniture manufacturers shy away from using pine, typically a very knotty wood. Make sure you check the base of your furniture for knots and if you see more than a few, it may not be high quality!
Seat Foam
Find out what the density of the foam is. The Upholstered furniture should have a seat foam density rating of at least 1.8 pounds or higher. Though the chair or sofa has removable seat cushions, unzip them and take a look inside as well to check for internal compartments in the foam that will stop it from settling.
Are you find for High Quality Furniture?
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Find High Quality Furniture
When buying new furniture, anyone is faced with the same choice: do you go for something fast, cheap, and easy? Or something expensive that will be more durable? It can this website be tempting to choose something inexpensive in the moment, as you may want something as quickly as possible.
Types of Wood
There are different types of wood that can be used to make furniture. Ash, mahogany, oak, and walnut are just some of the most popular types of wood used in modern furniture. Furniture can either be solid wood or veneer, meaning less expensive wood is covered in a solid wood finish. Equal these options are used in high quality modern furniture and are typically durable and long lasting.
Watch Out for Particle Board
Particle board is another type of material used as a base for a lot of modern furniture. These is typically used in cheaper furniture, as it won't stand up to heavy use over a long period of time. This is made from an combination of wood pulp, plastics, and resin – not as solid or durable as solid wood or veneers. It's not typically used in high quality modern furniture.
Cushions and Upholstery
Depending on the type of furniture you're buying, you should check if the cushions can easily be removed from the upholstery. For thing likes armchairs, dining chairs, and even couches, you should be able to easily remove the cushion covers from the foam or down. Although this may seem like a small feature, it will mean way less of a headache in the future should you need to wash the covers or want to change their colour or material. Low quality furniture typically doesn't come with this option.
Glue, Nails, Screws, and Joints
There are many ways that furniture can be put together. Wood joinery, where notches are cut into wood pieces and fit together, and certain types of screws are often used by high quality furniture manufacturers to reduce the risk of cracking and sagging in furniture after long term use. Things like staples and nails are less desirable (depending on their location and function). Though you can visibly see adhesive like glue holding parts of the furniture together, this usually indicates lower quality furniture. You shouldn't be able to easily see any materials used to hold the furniture together, let alone if it's simple glue. Your furniture probably won't last very long!
Knots
Knots are natural in solid wood how ever, they are also the areas of the tree that are weaker than the rest. If your furniture, such as a table, has a lot of knots visible, it means that the wood is weaker than it would be if there were less knots. That is why much high-quality furniture manufacturers shy away from using pine, typically a very knotty wood. Make sure you check the base of your furniture for knots and if you see more than a few, it may not be high quality!
Seat Foam
Find out what the density of the foam is. The Upholstered furniture should have a seat foam density rating of at least 1.8 pounds or higher. Though the chair or sofa has removable seat cushions, unzip them and take a look inside as well to check for internal compartments in the foam that will stop it from settling.
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#HARPERSMOVIECOLLECTION
2023
I watched Subspecies V: Blood Rise (2023)
There are already 2 Subspecies on this year's list of films, so as much as I don't feel like watching this movie, I feel it's sadly necessary.
The Story of Radu's turn to vampirism and pure evil.
Director Ted Nicolaou and his cast, including series veterans Anders Hove and Denice Duff, really do love this series they've created. It might not be the most well made, well scored, best looking or most interesting series in the world, but there is a team of people who clearly put their hearts into this.
This fifth film in the series is a prequel to the previous four films. Focusing on the birth and life of the series' main villain Radu, before he becomes a vampire and his descent into soulless undying evil. It's not a completely uninteresting story, especially if you've watched the series up until now. It's not completely interesting either, as it can drag quite a bit at times. The action isn't exactly mesmerizing, and try as they might, the dialogue doesn't exactly engross the audience. It feels like a medieval script written for a highschool production. Some of the actors are also unable to handle this heavily dramatized dialogue.
This is absolutely the best looking film in the franchise. It still retains a bit of that cheap straight to video sensibility, but with the crisp veneer of current filmmaking technology.
The musical score, as in most full moon productions, is not great and feels constant. The quieter moments play so much better in comparison. As always, the Romanian landscapes add a bit of credence to this movie. At least it looks like they're really back in time.
Unfortunately, some stuff is coming off way funnier than it's meant to be. The sped up vampire movements and non practical effects feel extremely dated. I'm cool with the cheap practical effects, but cheap digital effects have never been in style. If they'd cut all the unnecessary flash movement and chose to hide the makeup a bit better with lighting, they could have had better impact. Or any impact other than negative.
And for fuck's sake, if you're making a medieval period piece, run the clothes through some dirt or something before putting them on screen. Make them look lived in. Why are these people wearing brand new cloaks and robes? Maybe the budget was so low they needed to keep the costumes clean to get their deposit back.
Anders Hove is really good in the role of Radu. He's naturally menacing and interesting to watch, both acting-wise and physically. He is definitely the one real reason this franchise has lasted.
Look, Subspecies is a franchise of B-level, straight to video horror films that won't even come close to blowing you away. But, I'll always argue that there is something about this series that holds a minor interest. I really love a vampire who is a true monster, in both personality and appearance. I like it's attempt at creating a lore for itself. I like that despite being a low budget Full Moon feature, it takes itself seriously and presents itself with a heavy tone. Is it too serious and too heavy for what it is? Probably, but I admire the refusal to change its ways through the decades.
Subspecies V won't upset anyone who likes these films. It fits right into the series.
Now I'm happily gonna leave the Subspecies series of films behind. Please don't make another one.
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Well, probably because Greed's character arc led to that moment organically and closed in a natural way, that also lined up with fma's themes and story. So even when it was not necessarily expected or mandated and was tragic, it was still emotionally satisfying as a character conclusion.
Vs. While dying was always a possible conclusion to Tomura's arc, the way it was executed comes across as a cheap and anticlimactic shock death, bc it just unceremoniously cuts off not only Tomura's storyline - leaving a lot of emotional threads with Tenko, the Shimuras, and his side of the AFO plot, just kinda frayed - but also helps trash-can a lot of bnha's own themes. It doesn't work as a tragedy, because it throws the audience out of the story, with a sense their time was just wasted.
There's just too much build up around Tomura that suddenly feels like it goes nowhere in hindsight with this conclusion. And worse, it makes entire aspects of bnha in general feels like they never mattered. This isn't just a problem with Tomura when it comes to bnha's ending, but he's at the center of it - that the power of reaching out is repeatedly sold to the audience as worth it and necessary for a better future, and then literally is not the solution to the problems posed at all, the end, with no explanation for why the story would conclude on a really obvious and boring lesson.
Ofc we know that reaching out isn't always realistic and doesn't always work in real life. We live in the real world. That's not a profound or satisfying revelation, because the audience is not naive, and this ending despite seeming to be a mature, sobering, or "realistic", is actually the more infantalizing ending compared to everyone surviving imo. Bnha did not build up to a cathartic tragedy about the futility of trying your best, so it didn't earn this ending, and it falls pretty flat.
The truth is, despite the veneer of "reality" this very very literally is "and it was all just a dream!" as a conclusion, lol. We were enjoying a vision, and it ended in "no none of that was relevant actually the end". There's a reason It Was All A Dream is typically advised against, and it's not because it's "silly", it's because it makes the audience feel their time was wasted, bc the conclusion undoes most of the build up to it in most cases. That's why it's usually reserved for surrealism, or stories with consistent themes of time being wasted in itself.
Greed's death, meanwhile, is the theme of fma, and is immediately echoed in the following climax. The theme of fma is Truth, and the truth that Arakawa is selling to the audience is that human connection is the meaning of life. Greed breaks his code of never lying in order to give his life for Ling and everyone else, because Ling matters even more to him. He was searching for the feeling of human connection his whole life and when he finds it he realizes it's genuinely worth giving up his semi-immortal life to protect. He realizes he is not inherently selfish, and commits to an ultimate sacrifice, which is a strong character arc and conclusion for someone called Greed, even if it is tragic.
But more than that, the following series of events is on the same theme: Father's ultimate sin that sends him back to the hell from whence he came, was his eschewing of connection to others in favor of trying to elevate himself above everyone to control them, and avoid being vulnerable. Ed passes the final test of the gate of truth, by giving up his gate and ability to do alchemy, because he doesn't need the power when he has his friends. Hoenheim also gives his remaining life to the children he wanted to be there for, and wants to outlast him, because his love for them matters most. That is what full metal alchemist is about. That's why it has a strong and satisfying ending. All roads led to this, and it was the authors message to the audience. The truth is human connection.
By comparison, the equivalent of Greed's scene in bnha by narrative position is actually not Tomura's death. It's Bakugo's resurrection. That's the big emotional turning point set up that should lead into the rest of the final act. Bakugo being revived is narratively satisfying, because it's perfectly in line with the themes and his character arc. Bakugo goes all out against an opponent he knows could beat his ass and gets his heart exploded, but it's ok because other people reach out to help him and Bakugo no longer feels like needing saving is shameful like he used to. He integrates what he's learned from Midoriya, and the story actually set up this pay off. It would make no thematic sense to actually have Bakugo just die here.
And that should have been the prelude to an even stronger echoing of themes in the following series of events, the same way Greed's sacrifice does in fma. Unfortunately, that is not what happened. For whatever reason - probably a thoroughly misguided sense that audiences just want to be surprised more than they want a coherent narrative - Hori decided to swerve down an honestly tepid and thematically jarring ending. Things end not with a bang but a whimper, and instead of satisfaction, even cathartic tragic satisfaction, much of the audience will be left feeling vaguely dissapointed, like the point to them being there was missing. In conclusion, Hori left his story feeling like he had nothing to say to people with it, which is a shame because people were really invested in what he was already saying!
I'm super sick right now but I want to put this out there maybe somebody with more energy can take a crack at it
I love Fmab and I've been subconsciously comparing mha to it as the story goes on (afo and father, how well they execute their overalls themes,comparing Roy and Endeavor's atonement arcs, etc) and something that struck me is the similar aspects of the final battle (ie everyone coming to help defeat the big bad, the final punch, the protagonist giving up a power that meant so much to them) and something that struck me is how greed's death compares to Tomura's obviously they're different characters and have different roles in the narrative but both have their bodies possessed by the big bad, both actively help weaken the big bad to aid the protagonist and both die. But greed's death is so much more satisfying as an end to his character than Tomura's, it's so much more impactful.
Idk there's definitely something to expand upon there something to sink your teeth into but I'm too sick right now you guys get what I'm saying though right? Pls I really wanna talk about this with somebody 🥺
#Unfortunately this has been a bit of a writing weakness of Hori's before#Full cards on the table: I dropped early bnha because of this problem and only got invested later when it seemed to get a bit better#For the first half of its run bnha is really shakey on its on themes imo and has to catch itself from mucking them up often#And it didn't seem intentional at all I actually think Hori was failed by his editor somewhat#Not to let him off the hook for writing what he wrote but narrative conflicts like this is literally an editors job to spot#And im personally just so sad that Hori almost pulled his story out of his worst impulses but alas#Oomfie says it feels like his own insecurities as a writer got the better if him and...yeah :(#Yeah it really does seem like he got cold feet and felt his themes were too cringe and that people would be happier with something else#But he wasn't writing that something else so he just kinda ruined what he had going last minute imo. Oh well.#I think a lot about Hirohiko Araki's book Manga In Theory And In Practice where he outlines a lot of common writer traps and#Ofc there's It Was All Just A Dream and Shocking Deaths and why they usually do not work#And why he killed Jonathan Joestar and why and how that actually worked when he's so actually against those endings normally#And it really just comes down to set up and themes and understanding your duty to the audience a lot of the time#And it's amazing how easy it is to make theses mistakes as a writer even with the best of intentions and a lot of experience#Subverting the audiences expectations does not automatically equal substance in particular#It's a really good read esp for fans of shounen but also just for writers in general imo#A recc for these trying times ig lol#Sorry for hijacking your post stranger you probably could a better and more detailed post mortem than I
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Pine Wood
All about Wooden Crate
Wooden crates are an efficient way to store items like dolls, candle jars or even teddy bears. They save the homeowner a lot of money which would otherwise be used on buying expensive pieces of furniture. These crates are the most appropriate for the homeowner to use because they are cheap, are made of high quality materials and also the fact that they are available in many sizes and dimensions. At the end of the day, these crates serve the home by being the most perfect and smart way to display items that are worth being seen.
There are different sizes and shapes for the homeowner to choose from. What will determine the wooden crate choice are of course the budget and also the specific need that the homeowner has. There are both traditional and modern crates. The traditional ones are made in such a way that they have a handle at the sides. They also come in a variety of shapes. On the other hand, the modern wooden crates are made in the latest shapes and sizes as well. However, both these crates are equal when matters related to being efficient are concerned.
Wooden Box
Wood has been in use for building and storage for ages. It is a resource that can be found everywhere, and is easy to carve into different things. As such, wooden boxes are probably the first mobile form of storage. Artists realized that wooden boxes weren't just a convenience; they could be turned into anything. They could be forms of art.
Pallet - An Industry Essential
Basic pallets are constructed of heat-treated wood products and formed in a box shape. Each pallet has specially measured openings to fit allow transport by forklift, pallet jack, front loaders or other devices for ease. Often a load is secured on a pallet with the use of strapping, stretch or shrink wrap for shipments. Though the dimensions of a pallet vary with each country and each location, the most commonly used pallet in North America is in a square 42 inches x 42 inches for use in the grocery industry. The square shape of the pallet ensures stability of the load and keeps it from tipping. Other dimensions are used to meet warehouse specifications or to accommodate loading dock doors, train car doors or openings for other storage containers. Pallets can also be designed to fit through standard doorways when necessary. Pallet companies have the capability to custom design pallets to meet the needs of their customers accordingly.
Plastic Pallet
Pallets (also know as crates) are used to help transport goods around the country. They do this by providing a solid base on which to place and secure the goods, keeping from the sustaining damage. Also they provide a solid base to both stack and move goods using a forklift truck. Shipping
Traditionally pallets have been made of wood, but in recent years with the increase of developments in plastics, they have been made out of this material. But the big question is, which should you choose to use?
When Considering Buying Pine Wood Furniture
If you have never purchased a piece of wood furniture before you will find that it can be a bit of a challenge as there are a number of different types of wood that you can choose from. One of the most popular types of wood furniture that people seem to want is pine wood furniture. Pine is the wood that is typically used to make furniture such as dining room tables, coffee tables and sofa tables and even bedroom sets. The pine itself can then be covered with a veneer finish. There are things that you should keep in mind when buying pine furniture. LVL Pallet
How to Recycle Pallet
Pallets are used in industrial settings and may occasionally be used in residential settings. They are made of wood and are used as a platform for a variety of items. Pallets allow a large group of items to be easily picked up and transported. Most often pallets are moved around by forklifts. Transport
Due to the fact that pallets are made of wood, they are easily recycled. In fact, most companies that use pallets for delivery of their products offer a pick up and return process as part of the delivery. They will usually come back and retrieve empty pallets.
More Information - https://singmah.co/
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C3E37 - reaction
Matilda??? MATILDA???!!!?!?!?!?!?!?
Honestly, 11/10 episode! Loved every single second of it, SO MUCH.
First of all, big kudos to Matt for the imagery in the first half of the episode. It was viscerally creepy and unsettling, managing to evoke a bit of the original creepy Whitestone feel from C1 while still being true to it’s reality-warping prospects.
Last episode‘s Laudna!Memory felt, I don’t want to say ‘expected’, but very reasonable. It didn’t offer any surprises when we saw it, aside from the general realization that we were seeing a memory. THIS episode? With tHE FUCKING MATILDA REVEAL??????�� And then the ‘parents’ saying “Laudna” instead of “Matilda” WHAT DOES IT MEAN??? A nickname? Delilah losing force with her manipulation of Laudna and or the Hells???? I WANT TO KNOOOOWWW.
The skill challenge was a fantastic idea, and flowed much more smoothly than the airship skill challenge (which I still enjoyed, don’t get me wrong!). I also appreciate that Matt allowed Orym to contribute to two successes, rather than having it be meted out amongst the PCs.
The second half of the episode was just TENSE. AS. FUCK.
The negotiations with Delilah??? Fucking INTENSE. I do want to know what Chetney’s insight check revealed though!! He used it against her later on by saying that he can see the veneer of her lies, but then Matt had him roll deception, so maybe not? (also kudos to Travis for continuing to use the ‘do I believe him/her’ that Matt tried to push in C2. He’s the only one who does it, and I honestly love the fact that they usually just go INSIGHT CHECK, but I appreciate the effort!) I admit, I don’t think there’s anywhere it could have gone without a fight, but still, worthy attempt!
Okay, being honest here. And I believe I mentioned it before? But I was worried that the VM link would feel like a little bit of a cop-out. Last episode helped with it some, and even if this episode had been less intense I would have been okay with the resolution. BUT. With how much went into this episode? I am 100% okay with Pike doing the actually reviving without it feeling cheap at all. Even though the Hells didn’t spend the required gold/diamonds on it, they ended up spending even more via the health potions AND the potions of possibility. ALL CAME IN CLUTCH! I think the only one that could have been saved was the final health potion Imogen drank. But EVERYONE who drank the potion of possibility used it (at least from what I recall) and it came in CLUTCH. As well as the nat 20s they got! OH MY GOD.
So glad that there’s going to be an episode next week. (Even more glad that I think it’s probably going to be the Halloween episode so they’ll likely be in costume!)
Also? The Bells Hells logo is pretty cute. Not something I’d want on a shirt or something by itself, but as the zip, or the charm on a dice bag? Very pleased.
OH ALSO THE SET LOOKED AMAZING THIS EPISODE LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT
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Siege’s Fool’s 2022 - Day 4! 🎭
This is my entry for @dualrainbow‘s Siege-themed April Fool’s event (and do follow them if you’re not already!) ✨ I chose to write about Smoke/Mute as they’ve been on my mind recently (always, if I’m honest). Please enjoy this lighthearted fic about Mute receiving a sweet surprise 😊 (Rating T, fluff/humour, ~4.7k words)
.
James Porter is the epitome of cool.
He’s got an impossibly quick wit, ready to drop a line like he’s in an award-winning sitcom at any given moment, no matter how tense the situation. He’s easygoing with a fire underneath, passionate about topics in a way that allows him to crack jokes while furthering the cause, projects an aura of nonchalance without coming across as detached. He engages in ribbing without getting hurtful, complains without appearing whiny, raises issues in a non-aggressive way to allow for an open conversation. He’s always composed. He’s always having a good time. He surrounds himself with people who never cop on that they’re an audience, because they’re not, because he doesn’t perform. He just is. All that others can do is witness.
His smile is stunning.
Mute has gotten decent at spotting fake confidence over the years, at noticing when it’s a veneer covering an inferiority complex or other self doubts, hiding anger or trauma or mistrust. When he first met Smoke, he was instantly captivated by how genuine his confidence is, purely by lack of thought. Smoke probably doesn’t think twice about what others make of him, and it’s precisely this thoughtlessness that’s so intriguing.
His second impression told him that Smoke was also an idiot, ready to make a fool of himself at any point to garner cheap laughs, but he’s had to add a few footnotes to this assessment.
One, Smoke doesn’t do what he does for the benefit of others – or rather, not only, he does try to cheer others up if necessary, but he doesn’t try to curry any favour by playing the clown. He just enjoys doing ridiculous stunts, full stop, be it drinking curdled Bailey’s with lime juice to prove a point, or doing a backflip off of Sledge’s shed, or setting his eyebrows on fire. Mute has been watching him with unbridled awe and horror: this is someone who’s noticeably used to being popular. (Then again, Mute has been watching him with all sorts of other emotions as well.)
Two, he’s not an idiot in the way it matters. He didn’t goof his way up the ranks, he earned it, and Mute realises this when he overhears a conversation in which Smoke tries to explain the basics of atomic theory needed to understand how he came up with the special concoctions stored in his ‘babes’ (and yes, Mute might get a little flustered at how Smoke talks about them). Smoke didn’t get a single technical term correct yet managed to get absolutely everything else right. Leaving aside his … odd choice of words, all the details fit, he conveyed the general idea so well Mute was a little jealous (since he has a tough time explaining anything to anyone) and his conversation partner walked away from it enlightened.
So yes, James bloody Porter might not be book smart, but he sure is intelligent, handsome, funny, charming, and really really cool.
About three weeks into knowing him, Mute decides he wants to be his friend. Not a superficial acquaintance, not a casual observer, not someone at the fringes of his everyday life, no, Mute wants to be the person Smoke tells anecdotes about. He wants to be the subject of or at the very least a participant in ‘the other day’ stories. He wants to receive late night texts from him, be invited to take part in shenanigans, hang out without any plans, be at the forefront of his mind when there’s anything meaningful to share. He wants to occupy a good portion of his thoughts.
At times, he craves to be important to him with such a ferocity that he almost screams into his pillow and yes, alright, maybe he’s getting a little too intense about this but there’s never been another person in his life who’s mesmerised him to this extent. But this is where he’s at right now. He covets a piece of Smoke’s heart and is willing to sacrifice quite a lot to achieve his goal.
There’s just one problem. A small one. A snag, if you will. Not quite an obstacle but more of a … delay. Surely.
.
Smoke bursts into the meeting room with an air of devil-may-care, luscious mane as impressive as ever, demeanour breezy, smile easy, and Mute’s heart skips a beat. He looks good as always, casual clothes emphasising his approachability and every motion inviting comment to ignite conversation. The t-shirt is new, Mute can tell, looks like a band shirt acquired at a concert and he’s keenly curious to find out which band it is, what the event was like, whether Smoke enjoyed himself. He also knows the other man wanted to watch the newest James Bond over the weekend, and as Mute has already seen it, he’d love to hear his opinion.
“Morning, Mark”, Smoke greets him, beaming, “how was your weekend?”
Fruitful, actually – he finished another step in creating his own smart home devoid of any third party apps or security breaches, and he’d bet Smoke would be interested in hearing about it. He also discovered a fantastic Pakistani restaurant right next door. Mute opens his mouth to reply, and all that comes out is: “You’re late.”
And, well.
The angel, the absolute angel of a man merely beams at him and counters with a cheery: “Fuck you.”
“Fuck you”, retorts Mute, the epitome of maturity, and Sledge already has his head in his hands.
This is… normal. In that Mute just doesn’t have a freaking clue what happens in between the events of him thinking up something to say and then something else entirely tumbling out of his mouth. It could be his heartbeat, whose tempo would not be amiss for a smaller creature, say, a rabbit maybe but certainly not a grown ass man. And so, Smoke shall forever remain ignorant of Mute’s curiosity directed at his wardrobe, of his desperate need to invite him for dinner as well as all the conversations they could’ve had about mutual interests. It’s a tragedy.
It should be a tragedy. Shakespearean, possibly, in that two lovers friends who are kept apart by fate yearn for each other’s touch but are simply not meant to be, foiled by circumstance and societal expectations and prohibitive shyness. It should be dramatic and agonising and heart-wrenching.
However, the shit-eating grin with which Rook eyes him from the other side of the room turns this theatrical tale into a comedy. Who needs enemies with friends like these? Both Rook and Glaz have offered a counter-suggestion in that Mute isn’t a tragic hero of old with unseen, malevolent forces wrenching his happiness away, but instead, an idiot. A run-of-the-mill bonehead. An ordinary bellend who is simply too inept at socialising to talk to his crush like a normal person.
The only lesson Mute has learnt is this: never tell your friends about your unrequited crush. Just don’t. That way endless ribbing lies.
“Children”, Thatcher addresses the room, visibly tired of them already, and Mute subtly flips Rook off.
One might ask: how can he even be sure his crush is unrequited?
“You got a pen for me?”, asks the one person Mute wants to befriend so bad he actually dreams of them doing utterly mundane tasks together like scrubbing the stovetop or shopping for socks.
“Shut up”, he says and wonders if Thatcher would beat his arse for interrupting the meeting by smacking himself. And, well. There is no reason for Smoke to like him. None. Not when he’s this rude.
Rook’s amusement grows and Mute wonders if Thatcher would beat his arse for interrupting the meeting by smacking Rook.
Instead, he tries to ignore the nagging feeling of what if one day he just leaves and never comes back and you never got a chance to tell him how you feel and picks up one of his many pens to take notes like a good little boy. Except the damn thing won’t write. He scratches the paper a few times, to no avail, and inspects the object further: it’s a little… sticky?
He furrows his brows. Smells at it. Smells of… sugar? A hint of spearmint, too.
A suspicion forms in his mind. Before he can stop himself, he puts it in his mouth and yes, alright, this is candy. Tasty, though, so he’s not complaining, and snaps a large portion of it off to suck on it more inconspicuously.
All eyes are suddenly on him. And he realises that to everybody else, it looks like he just chomped off a piece of his pen.
“It’s a rock!”, he defends himself and (though the Brits nod in understanding) garners even more concern from everyone else, so he feels like he’s forced to explain: “I mean candy. It’s sugar. Must’ve been an April Fool’s, I bet all of you have one too.”
Shrugging, Thermite picks up a similarly-coloured pen by his side and bites down. Hard. Followed by the very satisfying sound of shattering plastic.
“Not this one”, he concludes, lips stained indigo.
At least now they’re not staring at Mute anymore.
.
“Tell me the truth”, Mute demands as he enters the base’s kitchen, closely followed by the two wankers who fancy being his friends.
“I think cryptobros scamming each other is hilarious, and I’m tired of pretending it’s not”, Rook bursts out and runs face first into Mute when he simply stops walking to stare at him with a mix of irritation and disbelief.
“When I was twelve, I hid a dead fish in one of my friends’ wardrobe because he’d been mean to a boy I liked”, adds Glaz.
“Sex doesn’t actually sell.”
“That haircut suits you really well and if I were James, I’d totally -” Mute slaps a hand over Glaz’ mouth just as Smoke squeezes through the door behind them with a half-hearted apology, then eyes them oddly when they stop talking altogether and merely stare at him.
“Didn’t mean to interrupt, laddies”, he defends himself, “carry on.”
“Don’t you call us ladies, we’ve all seen the photos”, Rook shoots back, earning an amused chuckle despite the misunderstanding.
“I make a great drag queen, don’t I.”
Mute has very much not seen the photos but he’d rather hurl Diana out a window than express any sort of curiosity about them with Smoke in the room. “Coming back to my original topic”, he tries to rescue the severely derailed conversation, “be honest: was it one of you two who switched out my pen?”
“Not me”, promises Glaz, “I swear.” Rook’s also shaking his head.
Fair enough. Mute is not sure who’d single him out specifically instead, or maybe it was meant for someone else, so he drops it for now. “Let’s just get our food and go.” He fetches his plastic container from the fridge and almost slams his head into the hanging cabinets when Smoke says his name. He can sense his friends’ schadenfreude in his back. “What?”
And this also is part of what makes Smoke so incredibly cool: he doesn’t capitalise on other people’s embarrassment. He’ll give others shite for making stupid arse decisions, but glosses over Mute’s clumsiness like it hasn’t happened the last 324 times. Though he seems to ignore Mute’s missteps more often than anyone else’s and – oh no, is he pitying him?! Before he can go down this horrifying rabbit hole, however, Smoke informs him: “One of your jammers got dinged the other day and Elena hasn’t gotten around to fixing it yet. Do you want to take a look yourself?”
“Sure”, he replies elaborately, leaving it at that.
Smoke seems amused now, for whatever reason. “I can bring it over later, if you have the time?”
“Yes.”
“Great. I’ll see you then.”
“Alright.”
And yes, Mute is keenly and awfully aware that he’s a dry, insulting, disinterested single k amidst long and friendly messages… but his brain won’t cooperate with his mouth. He stares at Smoke and mentally wills him into understanding just how much Mute wants him to keep talking just so he can hear his voice and observe his little mannerisms and gaze into those hypnotising eyes.
When the silence becomes too unbearable (after about one second, he can’t stand it anymore), Mute promptly turns to the old microwave in the corner of the kitchen in order to heat up his lunch, probably still lost in thoughts because he only notices something’s wrong when his fingers sink deep into a crumbly, spongy texture. “What the fuck”, he hears himself say, more out of shock than actual understanding.
He realises what happened when Glaz goes: “Is that cake?!”
Mute gapes at the bits of fondant, crumbs and jam sticking to his hand before turning his attention to the microwave-looking object that yes, indeed, is an actual cake. It doesn’t look like a bad cake either, and somehow this upsets him more than if someone had half-arsed this. This lifelike replica required effort.
“And here I was, bemoaning my lack of dessert”, mutters Smoke and grabs a plate from one of the cupboards to pile some of the intact cake onto it.
“It wasn’t like this when we came in”, Mute protests and then instantly doubts himself. “Or was it? I genuinely don’t remember. Who the hell -”
“Who cares”, Rook interrupts, holding a plate ready himself, “it’s free cake!”
And yeah, Mute can’t argue with that.
.
For the rest of the day, it keeps happening.
Smoke walks in close to the end of a very, very long workday to catch him snacking on his lampshade and raises his brows at the sight.
“Cotton candy”, mutters Mute.
“Flavoured?”
“Mint. This is personal.”
“Not a fan?”
“My favourite. Which is why I’m convinced this is deliberate. Someone did this who knows I’ve got a horrible sweet tooth, adore anything mint flavoured and despise these kinds of mysteries. I hate not knowing who’s behind it all and why, and I bet the culprit is getting a kick out of me agonising over this. I will find them, and I will make them pay.” His determined speech seems to surprise Smoke, who responds with slight concern.
“Was it really that bad?”
“Look.” Mute doesn’t care he’s getting worked up because this is getting ridiculous (even though obsessing about anything mundane like this makes him look decidedly not-cool). “All my spare ammo was replaced with wine gums. The coins in my wallet with shaped Maoam, those chewy German – yeah, you know what I mean. I had a globe-shaped paper weight: chocolate orange. I think someone saw me lick the window because I thought it was sugar glass.”
Smoke looks utterly entertained now and Mute can’t fault him. If it wasn’t so annoying, he’d be having a good time too. “Your window might not be, but that bottle of water is.”
Alarmed, Mute’s gaze snaps to the bottle he took out of the fridge earlier and notices it sitting… askew on his desk. Accompanied by quiet cursing, he procures a tray from somewhere in his office and holds the bottle above it, squeezing until it bursts in his hand, shards of hardened sugar scattering on his desk. It shouldn’t feel this good but he hasn’t done anything this satisfying in a long time – especially after a long, frustrating day like this.
In the corridor, a very concerned IQ has stopped in her tracks, staring at him with wide eyes.
Mute does not feel like explaining himself anymore, so while maintaining eye contact with her, he picks up some of the transparent pieces and stuffs them into his mouth, chewing with loud crunches.
“Someone must think you quite sweet”, Smoke comments with a wide grin and it’s the first time anyone makes this specific connection. And… boy, would it make a lot of sense. Nobody Mute knows would go to these lengths just to play a prank on him – at least not for cheap laughs, or even no laughs since no single person is around for all of them. For which he’s extremely glad, because it means only about a fiftieth of Rainbow watched him dump a handful of those small paper circles that come out of a hole punch into his mouth. (He’s not really a fan of edible paper, but the different colours had their own taste and reminded him of fruit punch. So yes, at least one of his colleagues now believes that Mute enjoys eating confetti.)
But if whoever is responsible for all this didn’t do it to amuse themselves, then Smoke’s interpretation seems terrifyingly valid. Terrifying, because this might mean the esoteric admin assistant who “keeps running into” him (she believes their birthdays make them a perfect match) could be trying her hand at playing cupid, and it’s not a conversation he wants to have after he’s spent the day consuming her offerings. Or, at all.
“In any case”, Smoke continues, probably able to watch the cogs turn in Mute’s mind, and plops the device onto his desk, “here’s the faulty jammer.”
“Sabotaged”, Mute corrects him immediately, “I don’t produce faulty equipment.”
Smoke seems unconvinced. “What happened to the SAS-only router in the lounge then? The one you set up for us?”
“Dom spilled his boba on it after Emmanuelle tripped him. And before you say it, yes, I did hide the bloody thing in the ceiling but no technological advancement is prepared for the unstoppable force that is a 40+ year old German with feet for hands.”
“Oh, is that what happened? I wondered for weeks why the floor was sticky.”
“Could’ve asked.”
“I wasn’t sure whether I’d really want to know the answer.” They both shudder.
“Fair enough. I’ll take a look at it and let you know when it’s in working condition again.”
“Grand, ta.” Smoke’s already half out the door when he stops and turns back, an unusually pleased expression on his handsome face. “You know, this is nice.”
Mute barely looks up from the jammer. “What is?”
“Talking to you. We should do this more often.”
And what a relief that he actually makes his exit then, stylishly timed with getting the last word in, because Mute turns violently crimson at the statement. He did just have a normal conversation with the person he once called ‘fish stick’ because he couldn’t think of a better nickname. And somehow, he didn’t mess up any of it, he didn’t walk into anything, didn’t do his usual monosyllabic robot impression, didn’t freak out and fake an obviously bogus emergency (“my hair hurts”? Really?). No, they talked like adults.
Oh God. The realisation makes his ears burn even more.
They bantered.
It takes him a while just to recover, reeling from the implications (will this remain the only time he’ll behave like a human being around Smoke or does this mean they can finally converse properly?) while battling a mix of embarrassment and childish joy. When he finally turns his attention to his signature electronic, he spots the block of fudge in place of the battery instantly after having pried open the casing. And enough is enough.
.
Dokkaebi stops chewing and Echo pauses the video of what looks like to be Pokémon CGI (are they beating up the American President?) when Mute barges into their lair. Both of them stare at him as if he had committed a faux pas instead of the two of them wasting valuable time at work goofing around. Not that he isn’t envious just a teeny tiny bit.
“I need access to your drones”, he announces.
“What drones?”, asks Echo, and Dokkaebi says simultaneously, “Not happening.” After a beat, she adds: “Uh, I mean, what drones?”
“As a fellow technology enthusiast”, Mute starts explaining himself, to which Echo coughs what sounds suspiciously like nerd, “I’m sure we don’t need to do this and you two can just believe me that I’m asking as a show of courtesy. If necessary, I could hack into them or, worse, just jam them. I have not, out of respect.”
“Do you wanna catch someone making out?” Echo sits up in his chair, which looks decidedly odd compared to his usual slouch, and opens up a folder on his PC labelled ‘evidence’. “We got a collection.”
Interesting. Mute considers it. “What’s the most outrageous one?”
Dokkaebi’s grin is shark-like. “Blackbeard.”
“Who in their right mind would snog him?”
“Nobody. We caught him practising with a CPR dummy. But that one will cost you.”
“That’s not the one I’m after, but alright. I brought payment.” Mute sprinkles a handful of wrapped toffees onto their shared desk. “There’s more where these came from.”
“Why do they look like erasers?”
“Don’t worry about it. How far back does the footage go?”
Echo shrugs. “About a day. Six got suspicious when we requested too many SSDs at once, so we don’t have more than 24, maybe 30 hours.”
“Perfect. I need the middle meeting room starting at about quarter to eight this morning.” Mute watches his colleague navigate some more folders before the sepia-toned drone footage begins playing in fast forward. The room starts out empty, with Thatcher the first one to enter, then the other participants trickling in. Mute’s eyes are fixed on the place where he eventually ended up sitting, noticing that Sledge is hovering oddly until only three spots are left: the one where Sledge sits down, the one next to him that Mute occupies only moments later, and one further down the table where Smoke joined them later.
And, indeed, Sledge is the one who discreetly switches out one of Mute’s pens with the candy.
“Why would he…”, Mute mutters, brow furrowed. “Alright. Kitchen next, at twelve.”
He watches himself burst into the room, closely followed by his useless friends, arguing about everything and nothing. Smoke joins them and garners Mute’s attention by mentioning the broken jammer – and yep, there it is. While Mute is focused on the object of his desire (desire for friendship, of course), somehow Rook and Glaz manage to switch out the microwave for its cake decoy. Good heavens, is Mute this distracted every time he interacts with Smoke?!
“My office next. Start yesterday, at five, that’s when I left.” And at this point, he doesn’t even care that neither Echo nor Dokkaebi bat an eye at his requests and readily showcase how tightly they’re keeping, well, pretty much every inch of the base under surveillance.
It doesn’t make any sense. None of the people who show up after hours to replace various objects in his office with sweets should have a vested interest in playing this kind of prank on him – he spots Thermite, Bandit (and sure, this is right up his alley, but not at this level, unprompted), Twitch, even Kapkan and Valkyrie. Well, and Smoke. But why this random group of people?
And why is Smoke standing in the middle, almost looking as if he’s directing them, and now Bandit is patting him on the back in a ‘good luck’ gesture, and Rook gives him a double thumbs up, and -
.
“You!”, yells Mute accusingly, pointing at an innocent-looking Smoke just about to leave the building. And sure, it’d probably seem a lot cooler if Mute wasn’t completely out of breath from sprinting full speed once he spotted his target on Dokkaebi’s live feed, and it likely would’ve increased his coolness factor even more if he had managed a perfect slide around the corner without almost losing his balance and slamming into a coat rack in order to avoid eating shite. But overall, as dramatic accusations go, it’s not the worst one.
Smoke offers a friendly, vaguely curious smile, the rat. “Me?”
“You’re the fucking… candy fiend!”
The smile grows. “What makes you say that?”
“I checked the footage from all the hidden – I mean, there’s a drone, uh, a camera in my office, and I saw you orchestrating this whole thing. How did you get everyone to help you?! It’s like you reconciled several warring factions. I think Fuze and Jordan shook hands.”
He’s full-on grinning now, mirth dancing in his eyes. “Impressive, innit?”
When it seems that this is all he has to offer, Mute gestures in exasperation, not sure which questions he has to ask in order to receive the answers he so desperately seeks. Well. Just the one answer, really. Maybe he should tackle it directly. “But… why?”
Smoke, the bastard, is standing there, hands in his pockets and posture infuriatingly relaxed, not at all flustered over being found out or the accusation in the first place, and flat out refuses to give a straight response. That’s how cool he is. “Why what exactly?”
“Why you made the effort – stop playing so obtuse, you fucking rounding error!”
It’s probably the first time Mute has ever startled a laugh out of him like this, open and unguarded. “Fine, fine. I do think you’re a sweet bloke, and I’d overheard that you like sweet foods, and with April Fool’s coming up…”
He thinks I’m sweet, Mute’s brain screams at him on repeat and he knows he’ll be dreaming about these words later. They’re making his chest swell and gravity recede and though it’s still open to interpretation and Smoke could still just think him a decent guy and play a prank on him like bros do, he’ll take it, only then Smoke adds: “And it wasn’t hard to get everybody else on board either. They’ve been pestering me about asking you out for a while.”
The nonchalance with which this blow is delivered is deliberate. Smoke knows exactly what kind of impact it has on Mute and he’s back to grinning (and damn, is he handsome).
Mute is gobsmacked. “Bu– … I -”, he flails verbally, “wha -” And then, once he’s vaguely recovered (at least enough to voice one of the many thoughts running wild in his poor confused brain): “That seems like it could backfire horribly if I wasn’t interested.” And why did he say that. Why is that the thing he chose to say.
To his astonishment and relief, Smoke somehow takes his unwarranted comment in stride and replies: “True. But I might’ve had the slightest hunch that you do like me.”
Mute opens his mouth.
“It could’ve been the fact that you kept bumping into random objects whenever I existed in any capacity around you. Or the way your ears flush red when we interact. Or that you’re so awfully, endearingly awkward when talking to me. Or that one time when you sniffed my jacket -”
“Shut up”, he hisses, feeling his ears heat up and betray him once again. “I get it. But… why me?”
All Smoke has to offer is a helpless shrug. “Dunno. Just happened, I guess. There are some people I instantly like, some I immediately dislike, and with you… I just stood no chance.”
And this is when Mute realises that in the grand scheme of things, Smoke isn’t the coolest guy to have ever walked this earth – and that instead, it was his mind trying to rationalise the inexplicable attraction he’s felt ever since he first saw him. Which is good. Because it means Smoke isn’t out of his league after all.
And that maybe, he’s always wanted more than a friendship but didn’t dare hope.
“So… wanna come over later today?”, he suggests, heart beating impossibly fast even as Smoke’s face lights up.
“Sure. I’ll text you.” A brief hesitation, then Smoke’s eyebrow twitches and he adds: “My arse crack still needs some icing anyway.”
It’s the perfect quip to leave on, and it’d be so fucking cool for him to just turn on his heel and stride out, leaving Mute gaping and with all kinds of imagery in his head. Except that Smoke walks straight into the closed door and cracks the glass when his thick head collides with it.
And yeah, he might be cool. But at least he’s not too cool for Mute.
#rainbow six siege#smoke#mute#smoke/mute#fanfic#oneshot#event#love the three youngins giving each other shite for no reason#I'm so lovesick for these two why are they so perfect#if you've never had a rock I'm sorry but they're great#my current poison: pining Mute
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