#I just feel like the entire identity of the fandom has been altered or lost or something | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

tearsofgrace · 4 years ago

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endings are hard... but they aren’t impossible

tldr; the good place fucking nailed the finale, supernatural completely and utterly bombed it.

tags: wc--4.5k, gif heavy, spn meta, the good place, supernatural finale, spn wank, all gifs are mine, if you read til the end there’s a pretty gif

so i recently finished the good place (i was watching w my family and we finally had time to sit down and watch the last season) and god fucking dammit that ending is FLAWLESS. literally flawless.

and because i’m, well, me… i spent most of the time during that hour long finale thinking about how supernatural could have had even a fraction of that and avoided so much heartbreak.

anyways. i decided to compare them. to REALLY compare them. to get into the nitty gritty of why the fuck the good place ending left me feeling, as the finale is all about, sated and complete. and why the spn ending left me confused, lost, broken, betrayed, unable to even enjoy my comfort show at all until a dear friend finally just watched an episode (8.08) start to finish with me.

so without further ado (always wanted to say that) here’s the good place/supernatural finale meta that no one asked for

comedy

we’ll start small. both these shows have excellent comedy. in extremely different ways… but still

in the good place finale, the comedy was perfect. whether it was jason reappearing in the forest, michael trying to get through The Door, tahani reversing the “hot bod” bit on eleanor, every comedic moment was actually pretty emotional and added something to the show. they deepened characters’ meanings, added to their relationships, and made the audience think as much as they made the audience laugh.

in the spn finale… the comedy was the pie gag. the whole sam shoving pie into dean’s face. beyond this being… like meta as hell (the whole prank thing) it doesn’t have any depth to it.

and to add salt to the wound, this “hilarious” thing happens RIGHT AFTER salmondean have a conversation about missing jack and cas that is equal parts flat and infuriating. the brothers, in particular sam about jack and dean about cas, should care more. this is their family. and family is everything to them. but, no, by all means pie dean in the face.

last lines

this one IRKS me. okay.

the last line of the good place "I'll say this to you, my friend, with all the love in my heart and all the wisdom of the universe: Take it sleazy.” “All right.” is ICONIC. okay?

it’s a reference to season 1 that doesn’t feel fan-servicey. it’s kinda honestly emotional cuz it’s like a message to us, the audience. it perfectly completes michael’s arc. it captures the light-hearted vibe of the show while also somehow managing to be poignant. you can see it coming like the second before it happens but it’s also not the obvious choice. it’s just. goddamn it’s good.

the last line of supernatural…. is… “and cut.” not even said by one of j2. i mean i know it’s a meta show but COME ON ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??????????

now i hear you shouting wait but that’s just the end of the thank you message. okay fine whatever. in that case the last lines are “Hey, Sammy.” “Dean.” (i couldn’t bring myself to gif that moment)

i’m sorry but. that’s predictable. that’s obvious. that’s boring. that’s flat. sure, it celebrates the bond between the brothers. but like… that’s not what this show is about anymore. it’s not just about sam and dean winchester it’s about what they’ve created. it’s about the world they’ve saved, the family they’ve made, about how they always keep fighting but nope we get bland, boring, coulda seen ‘em coming from miles away lines for the very end. that’s fine.

montages

the spn finale is like 50% montages that don’t make sense and are poorly done and not emotional

the good place has a montage of michael being human that brought me to tears

timing

here’s another short section. the good place finale was 53 minutes long as opposed to the usual 20 minute long runtime of every episode. granted, the fandom of the good place is very different, but STILL there was no documentary telling the fans things they ALREADY knew (there was a short special after the ep, but the episode itself was still far longer than normal). it was 53 minutes of plot. of really fucking good not rushed plot.

the supernatural finale was… what 36 minutes long?? as opposed to the normal 40 minute runtime?? granted, we did get an hour long documentary of things we’ve all heard in cons and interviews a billion times so hey. take what you can get i guess.

character arcs

this is most of the meat of this meta. one thing we’ve all been harping on a TON is how they RUINED character arcs. soooo let’s go through and juxtapose some character arcs shall we

eleanor

eleanor shellstrop starts the show completely self-obsessed. she died getting hit by shopping carts while picking up margarita mix and let’s be real she’s a total icon. love her to death. she grows a ton, becomes one of the most selfless characters on the show, and starts to actually (jack forbid) CARE about things. it’s one of the most satisfying and relatable character arcs i’ve ever seen.

it’s not just her selfishness either, her character is super multi-faceted and complex, and i feel like even in the end we’re getting to know her better. she’s afraid of commitment, always worried about what others’ actions will do to her, loves the trivial side of life, is queer as fuck (as acknowledged by the show in a way that’s not harmful at all but also isn’t explicitly bi/pan/unlabeled/omni etc, allowing queer fans to see their own identity in her), and is all around a HUMAN BEING. her ending at the beginning of the show was her death. her stupid, trivial, meaningless death where she was, as she puts it, all alone. and her final ending ISNT that. yes, everyone goes before her. and i think that’s purposeful. to show that she’s grown enough that being alone in some sense is okay.

but she’s never TRULY alone. and in the end. the REAL end. janet is there. the whole time. because eleanor asked her to be!! she got over her crazy need for independence and simply asked for help. and eleanor dies an amazing person that has become selfless, has found joy in philosophy while still enjoying trashy content, has fixed her relationship with her mother, and has found a sense of completion. eleanor’s life ends on her terms, and it’s beautiful.

dean

alright. now just as you’re feeling all warm and fuzzy let’s look at dean winchester’s ending. you’ve heard it a million times, so i’ll be brief. dean was raised to be a hunter, a soldier, a killing machine with no feelings and no purpose. he was raised to die scared on a hunt, his life over because of some mistake he made because he will NEVER measure up. at least that’s what john and everyone else told him with the exceptions of some of his family (and family don’t end in blood). he started to accept that he didn’t have to have this. he started to realize that he could CHOOSE what his ending was.

the beautiful thing is, we never truly got to see what that was. i personally like to think it’s similar to the roadhouse michael locked him in while he was trapped in his own mind. a safe place for hunters, somewhere he (and cas in my opinion, but that’s not important) could settle down and still be in the life. it would be an amazing tribute to jo and ellen, and just all around a great ending. he wouldn’t have to be scared, but he wouldn’t have to conform to some apple pie facade of normalcy. and ya know what?? say that he died so he could have peace i dare you. because dean doesn’t find peace until sam is there anyway so i beg of you WHAT WAS THE FUCKING POINT.

dean winchester died scared. dean winchester died on a hunt. dean winchester died on one of john’s old hunts. dean winchester died not directly at the hands of a monster, but at the hands of a mistake. his mistake. dean winchester died without ever working through the trauma of his best friend in the entire world confessing his love in a final act of self-sacrifice. dean winchester died in a way that leaves a sour taste in my mouth and does not at all show the audience what he’s been through and how much he’s grown. dean winchester did not die on his terms, and he deserved better.

chidi

okay back to happy. chidi anagonye. by far my personal favorite good place character (don’t tell anyone i always say jason cuz he and i are very similar). chidi in the last few episodes is SO DRASTICALLY different than the chidi we meet at the beginning. he’s decisive, confident, self-assured, and it’s amazing to see. he’s not afraid of life anymore. he’s not afraid to make the wrong decision and forever alter his reality, because he’s okay with failure.

at the beginning, chidi was so petrified of life that… it killed him. and in the end, he’s completely at peace with every decision he makes, even the final one. yes, he considered staying for eleanor, but that just shows how his moral code and his compassion for others is still very much still intact. it shows the audience that you can be confident and decisive without being a selfish asshole.

chidi leaves the good place knowing that it’s the right thing to do. knowing without a doubt that his time has come. the old chidi never would have been able to fathom being that sure about something. it’s beautiful. it’s a development that can give the audience peace, can show them that this drastic of change is possible, and that chidi became a better person for all of it. chidi went on his own terms, and it was beautiful.

sam

… this one might be controversial… but sam winchester. god i hated sam’s ending. at first i was kinda okay with it. like, okay fine he got his normal life. but, really, in the end that’s not what sam wanted. he started to realize that he didn’t need that apple pie, white picket fence life. he didn’t need the wife and the kids and the backyard and the barbecues because that is NOT sam’s personality and i will throw hands on that.

that’s not to say he doesn’t want some sort of romance, maybe even kids, but not in that way. he lets himself see that he doesn’t need to be defined by his rebellion to john. doesn’t need to be defined by going to college or any of those “normal” smart kid things because it doesn’t fit him. and that’s okay! but how does sam’s story end? it ends with a wife (that isn’t even important enough to show her face). with kids. with a goddamn white picket fence. we think he’s still hunting to some extent… but it’s not the arc we were led to believe would happen. it’s not this amazing leader sam that we see in season 12-14, uniting hunters and organizing them.

he had SO MUCH potential and they throw it away on a vanilla ending that shows only surface level pain at losing his brother. he doesn’t even invite the rest of their family to the wake for fuck’s sake. jared did an incredible job. pls don’t think i’m saying he didn’t. but that script…. sam winchester’s arc was cut short. he didn’t go on his terms, and he deserved better.

jason

jason mandoza. the only character that has ever embodied my complete dumbass energy to the insane extent that it exists. he went to hell for his impulsivity. he never thought before a decision. i aspire to be as reckless as jason while on earth. but he LEARNED. he got better, just like they all did. and by the end of the show, jason doesn’t need to be impulsive anymore. much like eleanor being left “alone,” the show does a masterful job with making him be the first one to go, capturing his old impulsiveness. but he chooses to leave. he takes his time in deliberation, waiting until a feeling of peace, of completion, of well, ‘true happiness’ (sorry cas stans, i’m right there with you) has settled over him.

the ending of his story is one of growth, just like all these characters have been. and the best part? the show makes it comedic in the most poignant and beautiful way, because it’s jason, it had to be funny. we learn that jason has been in the woods for like, eons, just waiting to go through the door because he wants to give janet a necklace. he’s learned to simply wait. to be at peace with… nothing. his torture was being a monk, but in the end, jason embodies those ideals. his arc comes to fruition in an extremely satisfying way. jason goes on his own terms, and it’s beautiful.

castiel

this one is gonna hurt like a bitch. castiel is my comfort character. he’s my role model. he’s me in a lot of ways. i love him. so fucking much. so excuse me if this is slightly incoherent. i’m actually okay with cas’ ending… in a way. because his actual ending as an on-screen character? perfect. self-sacrifice while coming out and professing his love to dean winchester. a little bit bury the gays, but let’s be real, it’s supernatural. and “happiness is in just saying it” has to be the most powerful way to think of coming out. it takes away the fear, it takes away so much of the pain that can follow. because the joy is in just saying the words.

it’s how this was treated on the show that makes cas’ character arc terrible (and we haven’t even gotten to 15.20). YOU CANNOT JUST IGNORE A LOVE CONFESSION. that is god awful writing and i will never change my mind on that. cas deserved his family to care about him. to at least address and be sad about the fact he was gone. jesus fucking christ after everything castiel deserved at least that. and then we go to 15.20. cas is in heaven. cas is serving god. cas is right back where he started. now, i’m coming off a little strong.

if the show had decided to show us cas and jack in heaven makin’ the world a better place… i woulda come around to it. i woulda realized that that’s not REALLY erasing 12 years of character development and cas realizing that his whole identity isn’t just him serving heaven and isn’t just him being an angel and that he’s so much more than all of that and he could still be happy as a human… because really he’s with his son. but they didn’t show us that. they barely even mentioned him. and to me. that counts as a bad character arc. and i’m sorry if you disagree. castiel may have gone on his own terms, but they treated that beautiful sacrifice with disrespect and disdain, plus resolved his arc by putting him back where he started. he deserved better.

tahani

*deep breaths guys this is a long post i’m sorry* anywayyyy tahani!!! we love tahani obviously. let’s talk about her arc, because it always kinda bothered me. throughout the show, we see all the other character’s growing and expanding their knowledge of right and wrong. and, don’t get me wrong. we see tahani grow a lot. but she makes a lot of the same types of comments and shit like that. but it’s how she treats the reactions to those comments. by the end of the show, she laughs at the caricature of herself that the others see. she isn’t looking for vindication in name-dropping, she just does it. she is far less self-absorbed, and is genuinely interested in those around her. she fixes her relationships with her sister and her parents in a way that doesn’t feel forced and actually feels like a beautiful, healthy family reunion.

she has a list and she does everything on it. it’s worth noting, that the things on her list are not at all what they would have been at the beginning of the show. most of them are humble “labor” type tasks, and all of them are in self improvement. tahani’s end on the show is not the same as everyone else’s. she realizes that she doesn’t need to be done. that there doesn’t have to be an end to self-improvement. and she becomes an architect. the writers perfectly embody her transformation from a self-obsessed rich girl who has never done a thing for herself and laughs at the lower-class to a down-to-earth worker that simply doesn’t want the journey to end.

it’s incredible how perfectly the writers were able to close off these character arc’s without it feeling forced, and without ignoring their character development. imagine that. tahani chooses her own way, and it’s beautiful.

jack

jack’s ending may be the only one that i’ve actually somewhat come to terms with. it’s not terrible. it’s not great. but it’s not nearly as bad. because ignoring that awful monologue about every drop of rain and shit, jack really does end up helping people. he ends up doing something that he loves and that makes the world a better place. and he doesn’t lose his personality in it. but. i dunno, that’s still his destiny, right? to create paradise. and this is a show about ripping up the rule book, about choosing free will above all else… so to have every single character just fulfill their destiny is cheap.

still… i’ll try to be unbiased. because really at the beginning of jack’s time on the show, he’s unsure what he wants. and at least, in the end, he’s sure. he has a wisdom that he’s always had but he’s now using. and i’m good with that. but what’s NOT okay about jack’s ending is the lack of on-screen family. jack learns that family is important. sam, cas, dean those are the people he cares about. and you’re telling me he would just NEVER see them again? and be okay with that? i know he rebuilds heaven with cas, but we don’t even get a story about him rescuing cas from the empty. and he seems in 15.19 to not be that concerned about it (after the amazing emotional scene at the beginning). jack should have cared about his family. he did. but they ruined that for him. so jack kline deserved better.

michael

oh man where do i start. michael’s growth is the biggest on the show. i mean. he starts as a literal demon and ends a human. he gets better, he falls in love with humanity (*castiel fan in me sobbing again*) and he chooses over and over to be good instead of bad. his whole arc is a classic redemption arc, and every single beat just gets better. he chooses selfishly to side with humans but in the end it turns out to be the best decision he could have made. because he develops emotions, he develops compassion, he develops a moral compass.

and his end reflects that. because to complete this arc of a demon becoming more human… he literally becomes human!!!! it fits so well. and he’s allowed to make mistakes and be happy and gain all that humanity has to offer. this just shows that human!endgame for cosmic beings that become more human WORKS SO WELL (and it shoulda happened for cas and jack that’s all i’m saying). michael went on his own terms, and it was beautiful.

eileen

oh boy… this one stings. because they brought her back, used her up, and we never saw her again. eileen was one of the best side characters on the show, and they rarely addressed her arc. she comes onto the show as a hunter seeking revenge, and gets that revenge in the same episode. her s15 arc is focused on what’s real and what’s not, with her relationship to sam admittedly being a central part of her character because… it’s supernatural and women can’t exist without that. but still! eileen grows throughout the show and in the end… we don’t even know what happens to her. it’s as if her arc wasn’t important enough to even glance at.

it’s as if the connections the boys make outside of each other mean nothing when in reality they mean everything. they prove that the co-dependency is behind them and that family doesn’t end with blood and that real connections can be formed between people that last a lifetime. eileen was a disabled hunter that was shown to still be one of the best in the business, and they didn’t even give her the courtesy of a goodbye. eileen didn’t go on her own terms, and she deserved better.

janet

this is gonna unbalance my list but goddammit janet’s ending was perfect. she was a not-robot, not-girl that should have been incapable of feelings. but throughout the series we get to watch as she learns first-hand about human emotions and processes them. she cares about the humans in her charge and fights for them on multiple counts.

in the end, we see janet come to terms with both her cosmic being side, and her human side. she never stops being with the “cockroaches.” she sees them all leave, she’s there for them while they’re there, and she also continues to speak her mind and live autonomously. janet was a non-human character done right. she lived on her own terms, and it was beautiful.

some honorable mentions

spn ignored (in the finale) chuck, amara, stevie, charlie, jody, donna, garth, bess, the other angels, claire, kaia, patience, alex, and the list goes ON in favor of focusing on JUST sam and dean. did none of those characters at least deserve a quick goodbye??????

the good place wrapped up multiple arcs i had completely forgotten about in a totally natural and not forced way. mindy, doug forester, (the mushroom guy, i know, it took me a second), pillboy, donkey doug, kamilah, tahani’s parents, eleanor’s mother, eleanor’s friends, chidi’s best friend, vicki, shawn, glenn, simone and so many that i’m forgetting all got satisfying ends that they totally deserved.

they even fucking resolved FROG GUY’S arc and gave him a real frog. that’s right. frog guy (jeff) had a better character arc resolution than dean motherfucking winchester.

heaven and hell

obviously in very different vehicles, both shows explore in depth the realities of the afterlife. and lemme tell ya, at the end of the day, one sits a whole lot better than the other.

the good place finale ends this quest for the perfect afterlife by saying that everyone can improve and that an eternal paradise shouldn’t keep you from eternal rest. they pretty much make me wish that this is what our afterlife looked like. they handle everything with care so it’s balanced precariously in a way that doesn’t give you anxiety looking at it but instead fills you with peace and faith in humanity.

supernatural addresses this series long battle between heaven and hell by creating a heaven where you drive for forty years without seeing the people (cough cough cas and jack not his parents) that matter to you and drink beer that tastes like shit. a place you can’t be happy or find any sense of peace until your brother has died and he’s there too.

and hell… well they barely even address it. there’s a new queen of hell i guess? but so what. it’s still very much heaven and hell in a way that’s the worst and hey plus to them… makes me wanna stay alive thank you very much. oh and purgatory is in shambles and not functioning properly cuz all that eve bullshit.

loose ends

whenever something is ending, you gotta tie up the loose ends. not in a “oh, we must wrap everything up and leave no stone unturned” kinda way but in a “wow, we should probably try to make this unambiguous because this is the last time we will ever see these characters” kinda way.

the good place does that. so fucking masterfully. all these side plots with all these different characters were taken care of all while focusing on the main six characters. we get to see how their intervention has changed everyone else. for example, mindy’s arc is wrapped up perfectly, with eleanor going to save her.

plus different running jokes like “take it sleazy” are wrapped up, we revisit really old callbacks like the original neighborhood, and all of it feels natural and in the moment. it feels like full circle in a way that doesn’t erase growth.

supernatural, on the other hand, left a million loose ends open. what happened to the boys they saved? where the fuck are jody, donna, etc.? did eileen make it back? cuz sam was pretty upset about that. what happened to it “being loud” in the empty? hell, what happened to the empty? what happened to hell? what about chuck? it woulda been nice to see just for a second what became of him. did charlie and stevie make it (i’m very invested in that relationship)? if we’re taking the original ending… why the fuck is jimmy there? did kansas just all,,, die?

i’m not saying they needed to address everything… but god a few wrapped up storylines besides the brothers wouldn’t have hurt

coloring

can i just… real quick… as a giffer lodge a complaint

the good place has beautiful vibrant coloring in the finale

spn has like bland washed out whatever the fuck that is coloring. it’s not even the dark early aesthetic cuz they dropped that it’s just… ew. so. do with that what you will.

conclusion

first… while writing this i realized just HOW MUCH it’s not about destiel… like believe me. i knew i wasn’t just pissed about destiel. but holy shit it’s not destiel at all like did i even mention destiel that much???? this was never about a ship. this was just a trash finale.

in the end. the good place writers knew what they were doing. they knew their fans, they knew their characters, they knew their world, and they knew how to wrap it up in a way that was satisfying and sad and perfectly fit the tone of the whole show. it wasn’t out of character or rushed, basically every loose end was tied up without the audience even realizing that’s what they were doing, and i feel happy and complete having watched it.

the supernatural ending was a betrayal. flat out. to the audience that has stuck by it in a way bigger way than the good place fandom. to the characters that have helped so many people. to the actors that have given so much of their lives. to the other members of the crew, to certain writers… all of it was just a slap in the face.

we deserved better guys. there are better endings possible. so i’m sorry. i really am. but i guess… that’s what fanfic is for, right?

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rollflasher · 3 years ago

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Another Sonic ramble

So once again I’m here with one of my rambles about my incredibly subjective view of how the Sonic series should be handled! *Beat*

...anyway.

So, one of the more recurring opinions on the fandom is that Sonic games should be written by Ian Flynn, I have talked before about the gripes I have with his writing and why I disagree with this but this post is not entirely about him, but rather a more general topic that has been bugging me for a long time.

The other day I was watching a video speculating about the upcoming Sonic Rangers, there’s not much to write home since it was pretty well made but there’s a particular part that inspired me to do this post and talk about it with other fans to discuss it.

See, at one point the video critisized the fact that Sonic Forces was written by a Japanese writer because they have to re-write the script in English and that can cause problems with localization, and that it would be better to have western writers from the get-go since Sonic’s main demographic comes from there, while making an off-hand suggestion that Ian Flynn could be a main choice. While I can see where they’re coming from, my response was a simple:

‘‘Absolutely, not’‘

See, I have a lot of issues with this to put it bluntly and I’ll try to break them down and explain them the best I can since they’re pretty subjective in nature, but I’m bringing this up because I want you guys to share your thoughts as well.

So, why does it bug me so much the idea of Sonic being handled by western creators?

In my case, the main reasons are because Sonic loses a core part of it’s appeal because of this, the fact that SEGA of Japan seems to have a better grasp of the franchise’s tone and characters and there’s the very subjective point that, in my eyes, American versions of Japanese franchises were always nothing more than dumbed down products of the source material.

To start with my first point, whenever someone talks about Sonic’s creation, a lot of people are quick to point out that our favorite blue hedgehog and his games were inspired by western pop culture and cartoons, and that is true, however oftenly they forget to mention a core thing that not only inspired, but also formed part of the core identity of this franchise.

Sonic is very inspired on anime, and at heart this franchise is a shonen.

(This image by The Great Lange expresses more clearly what I mean)

Generally, the most acknowledgement anime gets on it’s hand on Sonic is the mentions of Sonic being inspired by Dragon Ball, particularly the Super Saiyan, but there’s so much more than that, as Sonic blatantly takes inspiration from Studio Ghibli films specially in games like Sonic 3, which draws a lot of inspiration from Laputa: Castle in the Sky, this great post shows proof that this is not a coincidence.

And it doesn’t stop there, Shiro Maekawa himself has stated that SA2′s story (and in particular, the characters of Shadow and Maria) draw a lot of inspiration from the manga Please Save My Earth.

Even Sonic’s character design resembles shonen protagonists moreso than the main characters of silent cartoons, don’t believe me?

Sure, Sonic has a cartoony anatomy, no one can deny that, but he also exhibits a lot of traits from shonen characters such as spiky hair/quills (?), dynamic posing, a confident, courageous and energetic personality and most importantly, fighting spirit.

If you compare Sonic’s personality and more specifically, his abilities and moves to, say, cartoon speedy characters like the Road Runner, there’s a pretty big disconnection between him and western cartoon characters. Hell, this disconnection is even just as present if you compare him with a character like The Flash from DC.

Simply put, Sonic acts, moves and more importantly, fights like a shonen anime character. He doesn’t just go Super Saiyan and that’s it. Here’s even a quick comparison if necessary.

And this is important because this doesn’t apply just to him, but the whole franchise as a whole and when it takes a more western approach, all of these details are kinda lost or more downplayed, of course this depends on the artists and there’s YMMV at hand, but I think my point is clear.

My second point is...SoJ has consistently proven they have a much clearer grasp on how Sonic’s world and characters are compared to SoA.

Hear me out, yes, Sonic 06 and ShtH exist and yes, SoJ is not perfect by any means. But hear me out...when did the characters start to get flanderized and turned into parodies of themselves? In the 2010s...and when did SEGA move from Japanese to western writers in the games?

Of course it was more then that since there’s a whole tone shift that came with this decade and the new writers, but it’s not a coincidence that when writing in Sonic started to decay, western writers also happened to get on board with the games.

Besides that, SoA has a wide history of not getting Sonic’s tone and characters, from how they made media without much of Sonic Team’s input, to altering how characters are seen in the west. (Such as how they amped up Sonic’s attitude in their media or how the English scripts of the games featured things like Sonic seemingly barely tolerating Amy while the JP scripts portrayed this as Sonic just not understanding girls all that well instead, or for more recent examples, the addition of the ‘’torture’’ line in Forces). Not only that, but even ignoring obvious infamous writers like Ken Penders, even the ‘’best’’ writers from the western side of Sonic are still not above of giving us Pontaff-esque gems.

Like this one.

Or alternatively, I feel like sometimes western writers on Sonic rely a bit too much on their personal vision about Sonic which may or may not be a good thing, clear examples of this are Ian Flynn himself and Pontaff.

By contrast, while SoJ has it’s own share of notorious inconsistencies when dealing with writing (The 2000s era is a big offender), it seems that for them Sonic hasn’t changed much and this is visible not only on the JP scripts of the Modern games which are for the most part better than the ENG ones, but also things like the Sonic Channel comics and the recent one-shots they made with Sonic interacting with the cast show that for all intents and purposes, the Japanese’s staff vision of Sonic is much more clear and consistent compared to the west. Because of this, I’d rather have a good Japanese writer on Sonic games with the localization being focused on being faithful with the original script than have a more western writers dramatically changing the characters. (I don’t mention the tone since either way, SEGA is the one in charge of that and the writers have to follow that)

My last and very subjective point is that, at least for me, everything SoA does with Sonic involving the writing and canon feels like a dumbed down version of the source material. One of the reasons it bugs me so much that in the latest decade Sonic has taken a more western direction is because a lot of what I pointed out gets lost as a result, even if some of those elements are still there, you can tell they’re more downplayed with products like the Tyson Hesse shorts having a more predominant cartoon direction. If any of you have been following my blog for a long time, you should be aware that just because I prefer the Japanese Sonic content doesn’t mean I won’t give the western products a chance, my enjoyment for Mania, the Tyson Hesse shorts and the movie should be a testament of that, but at the same time I can’t help but being sour about the fact that because of these products, we don’t have stuff like a new anime for Sonic or even a serialized ‘’main’’ manga as an alternative for the comics, and my hype for these products is generally more subdued as a result since I’d wish SEGA rather spent that money and resources on more Japanese content than just merchandise.

In particular, because Sonic is a Japanese franchise with a notorious inspiration from anime, what I get from this is a pretty big contradiction. I know Sonic is much more popular on the west but...is it really necessary for his game or products to be handled by western creators to keep their appeal?

For instance, imagine if Dragon Ball’s manga and anime got replaced by western comics and animated series because of it’s world-wide appeal, would that really be the same?

Or imagine the same thing with Fullmetal Alchemist, a pretty aclaimed anime that has a lot of western influence. Would it really not matter at all if it’s Japanese products were replaced with western ones?

At least for me, it wouldn’t.

And what I said about American versions of Japanese franchises being nothing more than watered down versions of the source material? I have that view because of countless examples.

Mega Man and how the English manuals removed a lot of important information about the story of the Blue Bomber’s game and world, causing a lot of plot holes in the process.

American remakes like Godzilla 1998 or Dragon Ball Evolution being an in-name only version of the source material.

Or the many censored anime English dubs from the 2000s, for instance, whenever I see the Yu-Gi-Oh! dubs, I only see a very dumbed down and childish version of a show that was originally a shonen.

And I know that all of these things don’t have to necessarely get lost since every creator is different and there’s franchises like Avatar which are made on the west but draw a lot of inspiration from anime and I’m aware of that, and I want to make it clear that I’m not trying to say that American writers are not allowed to work on Sonic, what I’m trying to say is that inevitably there’s always gonna be some culture dissonance and clash when writers from another culture handle a foreign franchise. And even with examples like ATLA, I think being made by one culture while being inspired by the other is actually a big part of these franchises appeal and it’s something that can’t simply be replicated by handing it to creators from that specific culture they draw inspiration from.

I think James Rolfe’s quote about the same thing with the Godzilla franchise sums up how I feel about this.

‘‘It’s like champagne, anybody can make their own and call it champagne, but unless it’s from Champagne France, it’s not real champagne’‘

So, this last part was very subjective, but I think this post in general sums up why I dislike so much the idea of Sonic having western writers specifically in the games or just focusing more on that side in general.

But what do you guys think? I guess I am too biased so that’s why I wanted to ask for opinions and discuss this topic.

#sonic the hedgehog #sonic musing #opinion

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antihero-writings · 3 years ago

Text

The Boy with the Unspeakable Name (Ch11)

Fandom: Harry Potter (and the Chamber or Secrets)

Fic Summary: Tom Riddle may have won his battle with Harry in the Chamber of Secrets, but there were a few unforeseen consequences; loss of Tom’s memory being the most obnoxious of them. Is it possible to stop Tom’s past from becoming his future? Or is the young Tom Riddle doomed to repeat his mistakes?

Notes: Alright everyone I'M BACK ...And I'm so so SO sorry that I took so long to update. Over the past few months I took my first real break from posting fanfiction overall in a long time.

Before I posted this chapter, I actually ended up heavily editing some of the previous chapters, which I'd like to inform those who read the originals about first. (Currently only the Ao3 version, and the reblog version of this fic with the picture on top are up-to-date.)

* I made Tom overall more polite. I was of the belief that his politeness was not an innate trait, and without memory, he would be a bit more unpleasant, and then we could see him grow with time. I do still believe it's not an innate personality trait, but a couple things made me realize he really should act differently in my fic. * I made Snape treat Tom better in the interrogation chapter. Both at the beginning and end. I liked the ending with the Levicorpus spell, and I do kinda miss it, especially because it informed Harry's reactions, but I think it was just too mean, especially because of something I'm going for later. * I added a conversation with the other boy in the hospital wing. (By the way, if you go back to read that and can think of more things they should talk about, don't hesitate to let me know!)

...I think those are all the big things! Feel free to offer feedback on the changes if you read them!

I'm so sorry to everyone who was hoping for faster updates. I truly do appreciate your comments and support deeply, and hope that you will continue to read and still enjoy it. I would still love to hear what you think!! <3 <3

Chapter 11: The House of Books

“The summer? With you? And Harry Potter?”

Tom had been examining the objects Snape had brought him—objects which had apparently once belonged to him—and blinked, raising his head to look at him.

“Believe me, I am not thrilled about it either.”

“No, it’s not that—well, it is—it’s just…” He paused, running his fingers along the clothes laid out on the bed before him, then squinted up at Snape. “I’m trying to discern why this is a good idea.”

Snape looked away, seemingly wondering that himself.

“I think, with time, you’ll find that our headmaster has a very unique sense of what is good for others. He believes uncomfortable situations often serve for people’s betterment.” He looked off to the side and muttered, “Whether or not they agree.”

“What sort of ‘betterment’ does this serve?”

“I suppose he would like the three of us to…”—He exhaled—“get along.”

Tom raised an eyebrow a second time, as if to say Us? Really?

“Futile though it may be,” Snape added.

Tom bit his lip, internally assessing the situation as he also returned to assessing the objects.

It wasn’t ideal—that didn’t need stating. Tom had a difficult time fathoming why Dumbledore—who seemed to bear him no ill-will—would want him to live with one person who had a rather insurmountable grudge against him, and another who didn’t seem to like him much better. He wanted them to ‘get along?’ `Surely that couldn’t be it. There had to be more to it.

Was Dumbledore really so naive as to think they’d grow closer instead of hate each other more? Not that he quite understood why they hated each other in the first place.

“Is there a reason I can’t stay here over the summer? I wouldn’t mind.”

Clearly Snape would have preferred that as well.

“You no doubt heard at the Feast that there has been some question as to whether Hogwarts is entirely safe. The Board of Governors likely wouldn’t approve of a student staying over the summer until they are able to deny these suspicions. Also, the headmaster wants you to learn magic over the summer, and due to few teachers possessing a proclivity to stay at Hogwarts during this time, we must make other arrangements.”

Tom’s breath bated at the reveal that he’d be learning magic, his mind beginning to buzz. He tried not to let his excitement leak into his voice:

“You’ll be teaching me magic?”

“Do keep up.”

“So…” He sat back. “What’s Harry going to do?”

“Mister Potter will be…taking up space as usual, I presume.”

Tom stifled a laugh; he hadn’t been expecting such a response from a professor.

“You don’t like Harry, do you?”

“I’m not…particularly fond of him.”

“Is it too forward of me to say it doesn’t appear you’re particularly fond of me either?”

“I pains me to say you’ll have adequate time to learn there aren’t a great many things I feel an extensive amount of fondness for.”

Tom could already see it now.

“Consider it a trial period, of sorts.” Snape swept around the room as he altered the direction of conversation. “If you are able to succeed over the summer, you may continue your schooling at Hogwarts when the next year begins. How much you learn, and how quickly, will determine the year in which you are placed. That is, if you’re placed in any year at all.” He looked down his hooked nose at him like that was both the most likely option, and the most preferable.

Tom could tell hidden behind his words was the idea that this ‘trial period’ was about more than just how adept he was at magic. He’d didn’t need telling that he’d have to be careful in more ways than magical.

“Do you have any other business to attend to before we leave?”

“Wait, we’re leaving now?”

“I don’t come to the hospital wing for pleasant chats if that’s what you’re asking.”

Tom bit his lip. In all honesty he would have liked to stay and explore the school more, but he could tell Snape wasn’t the kind of person one could negotiate such things with.

He turned back to the items that were supposed to be his.

“Is this really all I have?” He asked softly.

Sure all the essentials were there: clothes, books, toiletries and the like, but nothing more personal. No pictures for his nightstand, or even a keepsake to remind him of home, of family. Nothing that could tell him a little more about himself.

Snape paused a moment before he replied: “All of which I’m aware.”

Tom didn’t say anything. Merely put everything back in the trunk and followed Snape to the door.

“Don’t you have anything to bring home with you?” Tom asked.

“Don’t you think a skilled wizard such as myself would have methods of sending it to its proper location?”

They spent the walk across the grounds in silence, which could probably be considered steely, though Tom didn’t mind. The grounds around Hogwarts, and what little he saw of the castle, were altogether beautiful, and empty conversation would only have dulled his enjoyment. He turned around, walking backwards, a smile creeping upon his face upon at the sight of the castle in its full glory. He came to find this wasn’t a school, this was a palace, a haven.

A—

The word home rose to the surface of his chest.

It occurred to him this was the first time he’d smiled since he lost his memory. Really and truly smiled.

The feeling wasn’t half bad.

Snape raised an eyebrow. “You like it?”

Tom cleared his throat. “It’s nice I guess.” But he couldn’t stuff the smile down, couldn’t quite figure out what this feeling was.

He must be a student, surely. Otherwise, why would he feel such fondness for the place?

He didn’t think Snape would reply, and was surprised to hear, barely audible, “I always thought as much.”

They arrived at a wrought iron gate with winged boars on either side—(really living up to the name, Tom supposed. All they needed was a decent amount of warts on them). Once they had passed through it, Snape stopped abruptly and held out his arm. It seemed he was expecting Tom to take it.

Tom wasn’t quite sure why he ought to do this, (and was rather offput by the thought of touching this man). Still, he did as he was told and—

He felt like he was being pigeonholed through a pipe. When the journey ended he was in an entirely new location, and wasn’t entirely sure he wouldn’t feel sick.

"Apparating for the first time can often make one feel unwell,” Snape informed the doubled-over Tom in a way that didn’t signify he really cared.

As Tom regained his bearings, he thought for a moment, in the same way he quite liked the walk along the grounds, he probably would have rather enjoyed traveling across the countryside. It struck him, that, while this sort of travel certainly got the job done, if wizards had a type of travel more like flying; allowing one to see the view, but also get where they needed to go quickly, he would like to learn it.

The new location, however, was far drearier and less pleasing to the eyes. Rather than an enchanting (and probably enchanted) forest, bordering sunny grounds, and a castle whose majesty was unmatched (at least in his current memory), this was a grimy, cobbled street, like a dull pencil: grey, disappointing, and without its sharpness.

He was almost certain the place was non-magical in nature. He couldn’t believe anyone magical would allow their cities to collect this much grime and…boringness. Identical brick townhouses lined those streets, their chimneys spewing smoke into the air, causing a low cloud of what could be either smog or fog to hang over the place, making the air warmer and more humid than necessary. Snape’s house was the last in the row, (at least, he assumed it was Snape’s as it was the one they were heading towards), and across from it he could see a black river winding through the mist.

Snape flicked his wand, unlocking what was presumably his front door.

Often houses have a certain, indefinable smell to them, but when Tom stepped inside this one, he found it wasn’t so indefinable: parchment, and old shoes, and maybe a little bit of neglect.

He could have fooled himself into thinking he’d walked into a bookstore. The walls were lined with books, the sofa and armchair in the corner creating a false sense of coziness—(‘false’ because nothing about this man said ‘cozy’). It had the air of being one of those spaces that is cluttered, but to call it anything but ‘neat’ would be an insult. Like a library of a devout scholar: cluttered with knowledge, yet, despite the fact that the shelves are puking pages, it all seems somehow perfectly in place.

“Make yourself comfortable,” Snape said in a tone that told him he didn’t want him to be comfortable at all. “Take care not to touch anything that isn’t yours.”

Tom’s eyes lidded. “So…don’t touch anything at all?”

“You’re catching on.” Snape smirked.

Tom rolled his eyes, not entirely sure Snape was joking.

“I’ll show you to your room.”

The words ‘your room’ were clipped, like the thought that it would belong to him for even a summer was repulsive. Though Tom could tell that before they arrived.

He opened a small door in the wall, which Tom would have thought another room, or perhaps a closet, but turned out to be a set of stairs.

After journeying up them, a hallway whose wood was in dire need of staining, dusty portraits whose stern eyes followed him as he walked by, and a decorative table with an empty vase upon it, greeted him.

The advertised room was small, and a bit stuffy, and a few of the floorboards creaked, but something told him he’d slept in worse conditions before.

Though it was a small house, they were able to keep to themselves. Snape was busy resettling into his house, and disinclined to give him a tour, and Tom, not having much to get settled in the first place, spent the time exploring his new surroundings.

He wandered around the library that was the downstairs, and the dingy hallways that were the upstairs. He took care not to enter what he assumed to be Snape’s room, as well as a few other locked rooms. He didn’t want to get on his bad side…if he even had a good side.

He quickly found he didn’t mind being around books. He had affinity for them, especially when their contents had to do with magic.

“Are these all about magic?” He asked Snape when he passed by.

“Some of them. It may surprise you to find most of them aren’t.”

“May I read them?” He asked, remembering Snape’s warning not to touch anything, as well as the fact that this was a ‘trial period.’

“If you cannot find ways to entertain yourself.”

“I’m sure I can. But you seem like the kind of man who appreciates silence.” He put his hands behind his back and smiled too pleasantly.

Snape pursed his lip.

They spent their time regarding each other as wolves encroaching on each others territories: they weren’t happy to be sharing the same space, but they couldn’t do anything but growl low until one of them made a move.

Later, when Snape made dinner, the action drew his attention from his book. Tom watched with fascination as Snape waved his wand with ease, and the ingredients floated and melded together of their own accord, like Snape’s wand knew what to say to them.

“Will I be able to do that?”

“A whole world of magic and you want to be able to make dinner?”

“Well—” Annoyance flared in Tom. “Of course I’d prefer to know much more exciting, dangerous things…but yes”

“Children are not allowed to use magic outside of school until they come of age…but, yes.”

The word ‘children’ in that condescending tone didn’t make him feel less annoyed.

��How come I’m able to do it, then? You’re able to teach me during the summer.”

“Dumbledore has his ways.”

Tom could tell he wouldn’t get any more information than that.

While they ate, Tom chanced a few more questions, and was surprised to find that it tasted quite good, and he thought he remembered someone once telling him good food does wonders for the soul.

He was glad to find that, despite Snape’s obvious distaste for him, and seemingly all things his age, he was cordial enough, and he certainly didn’t mind keeping to himself.

Tom was just thinking about asking when he’d start learning magic that evening, when a stack of books almost as tall as him landed on the table.

Flicking his eyes across the titles, he saw that each and every one of them something to do with magic.

“I expect you to have these read before before Potter arrives. Only then will I start teaching you magic.”

Tom leaned to the side to look at Snape and tried not to smirk.

“You sure this is everything? It doesn’t seem like quite enough.”

#harry potter #tom riddle #Severus snape #Harry Potter fanfiction #the boy with the unspeakable name #hp #hp fanfiction #hp fic #hp fanfic

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river-bottom-nightmare · 4 years ago

Note

If you’d like to, I’d love a fic rec. I like all the fandoms in your bio so I’d be interested in whatever you want to talk about. Thanks!!

Someone actually sent me the ask I’ve been waiting for oh my god. Anon. You are an incredible person and I love you. Okay so. If we were doing spn recs, this list would be over 300 fics long. If we did Marvel, I’d have to explain my stance on the current comics, and say why I like some parts of the MCU and why I dislike others. For Shadowhunters, and I say this sheepishly, I just posted a fic on my ao3. If you’re interested, please check it out! And I have been on a DC binge lately...so let’s do DC!

Now keep in mind I have so so many fics, so these are just my top favourites. They’re also pretty general and all over the place, so if you want a rec list for a specific ship or gen relationship or fandom, just let me know! I’d be more than happy to write one.

1. Yesterday’s Voices by @lemonadegarden

While trying to take down a drug cartel that deals with memory altering drugs, things go awry, and Batman wakes up with no recollection of the last five years. As a result, his family must now race against time to find the antidote, while also having to deal with a Bruce who still thinks Jason is Robin. A Bruce who doesn't recognise most of them. A Bruce far less jaded and cynical than the one they're used to. A Bruce who still cares.

Gen. 49,000 words. This fic was incredibly sweet with just the right touch of angst. Featuring a lot of Bruce being a dad, Jason and the rest of the batfam making amends. The author has impeccable dialogue and conveys the emotions of the characters beautifully. The pacing is a bit off, though, and the beginning seems rushed while the heavy emotional parts seem long and drawn out. Overall, a pretty satisfying read with a happy ending.

2. The Mystery of the Superboy Shirts by Aviatricks

The thing is, Tim is a detective, first and foremost. And like most detectives, sometimes he just can’t let things go. (Or, how Tim acquires several hundred Superboy t-shirts)

Tim/Kon. 4,000 words. I’m sure this fic has been recced a thousand times in a thousand different lists, but there is no way I can leave it out. Good old fashioned fluff and humor. It’s light and happy and leaves you with a laugh at the end. If you’re in the mood for a oneshot full of smiles and core four fluff (and really, who isnt?) then this fic is a go-to!

3. Every Fiber of My Being by @lanestreets (I am so sorry if this is the wrong url. The one on ao3 didn’t work so I had to do some digging.)

As much as Dick and his siblings have argued, Bruce has never budged on his "Keeping Secrets Policy". There's not a person alive outside of the family that knows the secret identity of any of the Bats. Not even Dick's boyfriend. Dick understands the need for some secrets, knows that keeping their identities safe keeps them and their loved ones safe, but when he takes up the cowl, team dynamics aren't the only things that begin to change.

Birdflash. 21,000 words. This has got to be my most favourite birdflash fic of all time. Partly because it’s based off Dick and Wally from the comics (their personalities are particularly Titans-esque, but I’m not 100% sure) rather than from Young Justice. It’s mainly Dick-centered, showcasing his relationships with Wally but also with the rest of his family. If you’re not sure of what exactly happened with Bruce being lost in time and Dick becoming Batman, I would brush up on that first, because this fic won’t make much sense without it. It takes you on a whirlwind of feels, and the frantic, gradually quickening pace of the prose matches the plot of the fic, and I just - ah! I would definitely give this fic a read!

4. Declensions by @dustorange

“My father,” Dick says, “worked the rope. It cut him. His hands were never clean.”

Gen. 13,500 words. Dick-centric. This fic is absolutely gorgeous and it needs more love. The reason I think it’s so incredible is because it takes a deep dive into Dick’s Romani heritage which is something that I adore DC did but hate the way the executed it. But still, representation is representation, and when you have fics like these to show what Dick being Romani would actually reflect, it’s hard to complain. Beautifully written, and the overt racism and difficulty fitting in really hits home, even for someone who’s experienced it firsthand. A little bit of the prose is jumbled and hard to follow, but that may be an artistic choice reflecting Dick’s state of mind during the fic. Read this if you want to realize some things you’ve never thought of before.

5. Those Who Wait by @last01standing

The best way to socialize an angry assassin boy: Set up a playdate with someone functionally invulnerable. [Jon and Damian through the years. Reverse!Robins universe. Stands alone.]

Damijon. 11,000 words. I’m not usually a fan of reverse robins, but I liked this one because it focused on the way Damian and Jon’s relationship grew through the years. It also doesn’t just switch Damian and Dick’s names while keeping their personalities the same, or have Damian become a harsh, uncaring person who can barely be classified as an older brother, both of which I’ve seen in these types of fics and I hate. Damian’s character development is extremely well done and actually realistic, so kudos for that. Jon is written as an actual character with feelings and motivation, rather than a “smol little bean” whose entire personality is “uwu.” While it can be funny in incorrect quotes and humor, it doesn’t do well for depth, and I like how this fic explored Jon’s human side. All in all, an interesting read, almost to the point of a character study. Also the shipping stuff with the eventual happy ending is cute too.

6. In The Game by WithTheKeyIsKing

Everyone knows that if you want Don Bruce Wayne to hear you out, there are a few people you have to talk to first. (And frankly, his sons can be just as terrifying.)

Gen. 4,000 words. Part 1 of a series. Once again, I love this for the way the characters are explored. Each member of the family’s individual personalities are examined, then taken and twisted just slightly to the left, leaving you breathless reading a fic that actually seems 100% plausible. The second person in the first fic is a bit off-putting at first, until you reach the end and realize what the author was setting up for. While not a fic I like to read as an alternate way of imagining canon, this is a cool idea worth a visit.

7. Safe and Sound by @kingburu

Post-Endgame, Nightwing finds Kid Flash at Mount Justice.

Birdflash. 12,000 words. I have literally created a moodboard for this fic, that’s how much I loved it. Now, I’ll be the first person to say I’m not a fan of Young Justice. While it set up a good premise, the characters are introduced and gone too fast for us to actually care, and the show is just different enough from canon comics to seriously bother me. But, if there’s one thing I truly loved, it was Dick and Wally’s easy friendship in Season 1. It was like the ultimate best friends to lovers. However, apparently DC can’t ever let me or Wally be happy because Endgame happens and I die a little inside. This fic is a self indulgent little oneshot of Wally accidentally time travelling to the future, after he died, and coming to terms with the fact that he loves his best friend and he left him all alone. Heartbreakingly sad, this takes you on a journey through Wally’s emotional mindset. It does not have a happy ending, and leaves you feeling bittersweet in all the right ways.

All right, those are seven of the best DC fics there are, at least in my book. Once again, these are just general. If you want a specific pairing or fandom, just let me know. Ask and ye shall receive. Also, if you want to scream one of the fics from the list you read, or any other fic or headcanon, just message me. I’m literally always down to talk.

Hope you like the list, anon. Happy reading!

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black-streak · 5 years ago

Text

Waiting For The Worms - The Show Must Go On

Part 4

Sooo, this isn't nearly as dark and has very little angst in comparison to the point I'd almost say it isn't? It's pretty much just an update on life in a way. Which is also part of why it took so long for me to write. Like, the struggle was real. Next chapter will go back to your regularly scheduled heartbreak.

Warnings from chapter 1, while mostly inapplicable for this part, still in effect.

The gallery: @northernbluetongue @thethirdwheelfriend @shizukiryuu @theatreandcomicfreak @michellemagic @karategirl119 @moonlightstar64 @my-name-is-michell @mystery-5-5 @zalladane @queen-of-the-trash-planet-tm @miraculousdisapointment @dorkus-minimus @jardimazul @allthebooksandcrannies @g-arya @worlds-tiniest-spook-pastry @persephonescat @mycupisbroken @luciferge @18-fandoms-unite-08 @dawnwave16 @alwaysreblogneverpost @kris-pines04 @mysteriouslyswimmingfan-blo-blog @weird-pale-blonde-person @you-will-never-know-how-i-think @kokotaru @naclychilli @slytherinhquinn @clumsy-owl-4178 @ladybug-182 @darkthunder1589 @evil-elf16 @dast218 @lysslovsanime @emilytopaz @naoryllis @iloontjeboontje @thepeacetea @danielslilangel @finallyaniguana @i-like-fairytail-and-stuff @vixen-uchiha @yuulxd @bleeding-heart-romantic @magic-inthe-stars @st0rmy-w1th1n

~---~

The next year of Jason's life was hectic to say the least.

It started with the downfall of Lila Rossi. Which consequently, he had no part in. She stepped on the wrong toes, made a few too many contradictions and suddenly a pile of lawsuits were stacked against her. Her mother went completely ape shit on her and pulled her out immediately to be shipped off to a very strict boarding school. More like a juvenile detention center if the rumors were true.

For the first month, no one approached him. The guilty, stricken looks upon his classmates' faces told a million stories of apologetic remorse, but since becoming a jaded, snarky outcast, 'Marinette' was no longer the person you could give a simple apology to and expect forgiveness. And no one wanted to be the first to get shot down.

Eventually, the first apology came. Surprisingly, Alya tried to win his favor. She groveled and apologized up and down on how terrible she and Lila had been and named every reason in the book as to why she had reacted and treated Marinette the way she did in an attempt to explain herself. While it wasn't necessarily surprising that she would be the first to not fear him, it was shocking she saw the error of her ways so soon with all that bull headed ego she carried around.

Bravery got her nowhere, however, as Jason only lifted an eyebrow, arms crossed as he leaned back, and calmly replied.

"Cool story, still betrayal."

As the girl sputtered before him, he turned back towards Chloe, continuing to make their plans for the day. After two minutes had passed and Alya still stood there hunting for her words, he turned back.

"Can you leave? Sometime today would be nice."

And so the precedent was set. While it took another week for someone else to approach, they seemed spurred on by the ease of Alya's dismissal. Suppose they figured if the biggest offender only got mild verbal abuse and dismissal, things had to go more smoothly for them.

Nino came next, awkward shuffling and avoided eye contact included. He pushed through his apology, beating around the bush and trying to defuse the situation at the same time he built it up. It only served to piss Jason off. They deserve better than this. At least meet her eyes if you're going to apologize and expect me to believe it.

"Uh… Marinette? Did you hear me?"

"I'm sorry, were you talking to me? I assumed you were talking to the desk next to me and minded my business. Would hate to be accused of eavesdropping."

He flinched at the reminder and finally looked him in the eye.

"I'm sorry. What we did was wrong. What I did was wrong and I am so beyond sorry for it. There is no excuse for my behavior."

"You're right. There isn't. Do better in the future."

"I will!," he rushed to reassure Jason, voice hopeful, "Does this mean we can be friends again?"

"No. Do better for those who chose to be your friend in the future."

"Oh… okay, yeah, that's fair," Nino gave a downtrodden look and wandered off.

Next came Sabrina and Rose, who didn't so much as apologize to him, but instead tried to reattach themselves to Chloe and Juleka's sides as if nothing had happened at all. This might not have thrown Chloe in the slightest, but poor Juleka looked a moment from having an anxiety attack. Chloe made short work of both girls, dismissing them entirely and when Rose started to cry and stare at Juleka for reassurance that everything was okay, Jason pulled the goth into a hug, glaring at the little blonde girl, until eventually she received the hint and ran off, tears streaming down her face. Apparently Nathaniel gave Marc the same treatment.

Lastly Kim, Alix, Max, Ivan, and Mylene came as a group. They must've taken comfort in their numbers, hoping it would somehow protect them from him singling them out. Thought everything would go smoother that way. He could hear Juleka grumbling at his side where they sat under a tree for lunch. They both appreciated the shade and quiet peace of the place. Marc sat on her other side, writing away in a journal.

"Hey Mari, we wanted to apologize for the way we've been acting lately," Alix took the lead.

"Yeah, it was really uncool of us," Kim followed up, the others nodding along.

They looked imploring. Like they were waiting for some sort of forgiveness. He couldn't help but wonder if they thought their actions were somehow better. That he couldn't really be mad at them because they weren't the ones who lied or lead the pack against his soulmate. They didn't make harsh accusations or physically attack Marinette. So somehow, they were better and their apologies could be less.

How fucking rude. How presumptuous. How entitled to think his time, thoughts, feelings were forfeit in their need for forgiveness. Marinette deserved better in her time here than these heartless bastards. None of them ever defended her either. Or him for that matter. Not one of them tried to so much as change the subject to avoid harping on him. None cared when his soulmate never returned to her body. Maybe that wasn't fair, but at the very least they could've approached him in his grief when it was easily displayed. Everyone here had a soulmate and knew the signs of loss for when one died. Surely they knew that this person in this body lost their other half. And yet not a soul outside of his group had offered condolences.

"That's all you have to offer? That it wasn't cool?" Juleka asked, tone quiet but sharp.

"Well it's not like we-"

"Let me cut you off there, before you piss me off. You didn't personally attack me, you just watched and snickered behind hands. Joined in to the cruel jokes and snide remarks. Encouraged those who did attack. At least they had the decency to be that way to my face and let me know where we stood. You? Hiding behind others actions and grouping up to give half-hearted sorrys that you barely think of before you speak? Now you guys are the ones that truly infuriate me. Either you believed I deserved the treatment I received but refused to be singled out for it. Or you thought what was happening was wrong and were too much of a coward to step up and help me out. I'm not sure which is worse. Either way, I don't want to see a single one of you approach me again. I don't mean enough to you to make a stand? Then you don't mean enough to me to even speak to. Get out of my face."

When his little speech was done and the startled masses ran off with an added glare, protests held on the tip of tongues, Jason slumped back against the tree, taking small comforts in the silent support of his two companions.

Adrien never approached. That was for the best.

His friend group was also something new. Marc, Juleka, Chloe, and Kagami. The group technically leaned more female than anything, but after the heavy masculine energy of his old life, this turn of events felt refreshing. It helped that Marc came out as nonbinary and Jason couldn't help but relate in a way with his view of this body fitting as female, but his mind staying firmly male. Altering his soulmate's body to fit would never happen, but it also didn't match him.

The group only grew stronger and more resilient after Jason agreed to revealing identities in the team. After the loss of Mari and the stripping of the ring from Adrien, Jason found it necessary to place new permanent holders. With Kagami and Chloe having screwed up their original hero personas, the placement became a challenge.

He started out with figuring out his new cat.

Talking it over with Fu and dragging the decision out way longer than it needed to, he eventually convinced the old guardian of Kagami's worth. She took to Plagg with ease, the design of her look altering to match. The suit stayed all black but wasn't leather and had gold detailing. The ears and tail looked more realistic as well. Her hair went pitch black and eyes went to shades of gold. Kagami insisted her new name be Serval.

Next came Chloe who ended up comforting Jason the most through his despair, whether she knew the reason for it or not. Without the bee as an easy go to, he ended up giving her the Dragon. Sure, the mix wasn't the best ever, but it kept her on the offensive side and more active, so it worked the way they needed it to. Her outfit consisted of tight fitted scales in shades of black and blue. Unlike when Kagami used the dragon, her and Longg took more to the shades of blue that came with most weather. Her shock of blonde hair played nicely with the idea of lightening on a stormy day. She went with Nimbus.

Surprisingly, Marc became the next holder. Jason planned on handing off the fox to Juleka, only to realize it wouldn't quite suit the girl. She stayed in the shadows most of the time, yes, but not really by choice. She wanted to be a model and show up in photos more than anything, so it made no sense to stick her with another identity she had to hide in. Add on the fact that she wasn't necessarily the most creative and well, Jason couldn't hand off an illusion piece to her. That's when Marc came into play. The kid had creativity in spades and preferred to avoid the spotlight. Marc and Marinette grew closer with all their time spent in the art room and courtyard together and especially with Nathaniel having ditched them. With Marc starting to build a spot of their own within the group, it only made sense to pair them with the Fox.

Now that he thought about it, the whole team really stuck with black. Marc had a black velvety almost shapeless form, with white tail, ears, sash, gloves, and boots. Their eyes fell white on gray on black and gave off an eerie feel. They choose Jocular for their hero name.

Finally, Jason hunted down the perfect miraculous for Juleka. The mouse. Quiet and unseen, playing in the background until the moment was right. And then she was everywhere, a multitude taking over the scene and overwhelming the enemy in a matter of moments. Perfect for the girl who hid behind her bangs but longed for the spotlight. Mullo played to both halves of her personality. The suit that came with consisted of a deep vivid purple that matched her bangs while detransformed. While in costume, the highlights disappeared and her eyes shined purple as well. The fit was reminiscent of a belted, hooded tunic with black leggings and matching purple booties. She went with Fievel. Turns out Juleka had an interesting favorite childhood movie. Months later, they would find themselves sitting around a tv, watching the old animated musical, but in the beginning, they just took it in stride.

The last major change came in a heavier bond forming amongst his team.

When Jason agreed to reveal identities, if for no other reason than the guilt of already keeping one major secret from the group, things spiced up. For one, Juleka and Marc traded their respective miraculouses back and forth depending on their comfort level for the day. If one felt more ready for the spotlight, they took to the mouse for the battle. If one felt especially creative at the moment, they tagged in for the fox. Of course, they jumped in with whichever they had when an akuma hit while separated, but the switch off seemed to comfort them.

Secondly, Chloe started running more interference to allow them escape time if stuck up in civilian form. Her false bratty attitude and daddy issues came into play here, despite her actual maturity about both. It helped to amp it up from time to time.

Lastly, Kagami and Jason begin to switch on occasion.

Plagg hadn't been outside the ring since Jason removed him from Adrien and Kagami received him. The shock and horror on his face when Tikki told him the reality of their situation broke Jason a little more. The cat insisted on spending more time with Jason after that. His soul resonated better with the ring anyways, so the time spent as the cat holder felt soothing after so long as the ladybug, despite this body feeling more receptive towards Tikki's magic.

As an added bonus, the two kept the other's costume and attributes such as eyes and hair. Between that and the heavy magical glamour hiding their identities, no one, not even Hawkmoth, knew which one was which until their fighting style came into play at which point, it was too late. Luckily, with the sneaky aspects of the mouse and fox, the other two became quite the ambush as well. Add in Chloe showing up with one of three different powers at any given moment, and Hawkmoth's akumas became easy prey.

By the time the year ran out, their team ran as a well oiled machine. Despite the horrific heartbreak festering in his heart, Jason felt hopeful. Hopeful that they might take down the villain that had taken over his soulmate's life from so young. That this battle at least might end on a happy note. That soon he would be free to seek out justice for Marinette once and for all.

#maribat #jasonette #ml x dc #WFTW #part 4 #did i mention i never edit these?#choosing the team was a four day struggle

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veridium · 5 years ago

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fuck it, queer meta.

About a year ago I wrote one of my first and largest meta posts about why I consider Cassandra a prime example of queerbaiting despite her being a character who explicitly says she is heterosexual. This lead to quite the day of inbox hate mail from people throughout the fandom. Most were upset I used the “q slur” and left it untagged as such in the big DA meta tags. I can imagine for those folks, the substance of what I had to say mattered little as a result.

I deleted most of those messages and my responses soon afterward. They upset me greatly even as I took it all in stride. However, given that it’s been about 365 days since that fiasco, and some interesting events have happened with regards to current and former DA writers, I thought it would be “fun” to write a recap and reflection on why, generally, I still feel the way I did when I wrote that post. With some changes and growth, of course.

The gist of it is, as we have come to learn in past, recent, and ongoing discourses in fandom, that much to the chagrin of a lot of folks in this fandom: BioWare, and in this instance DA writers, are not your SJW Icons. Furthermore, they never should have been, or should be, considered as such.

The gist (part two) for me, is: for as much as diverse characters, worlds, and societies are being uplifted by Games these days, the counterbalance of bullshit is still there. And I think it survives most sturdily in the kind of logic the BioWare writing culture throughout the years. This sense of egalitarian, “of course” logic, that appears to make socially deviant identities normalized but really just falsely positions those identities as meant to be in lock-step with the norm. Representation to gaming, and most of media writ large, all-too-easily falls into the trap of “we want what the privileged have,” which it to say, we want our existence to be a no-brainer, even if it means we lost the essence of why our stories are so profound, important, and necessary to do justice.

I really can’t imagine accepting the way characters like Cassandra were written because I don’t accept the writer(s) who wrote her. Why?

Come with me, and we’ll be, in a world, of pure fuckery...but with citations...because I’m an Academic and that’s my roll.*

*Please see tags for pertinent content warnings before clicking.**

**if you reblog and tag this shit with “q slur,” I will take all the reserves of understanding I have as a DA fic writer for all of the enraged womxn in the series and express it accordingly. And, as a femslash-oriented author, I can promise you: that expression will be consumptive.

Hm, I wonder, what with the predominant writer for her character inquires on Twitter for “lesbian fanfic porn” recommendations for writing “research,” but seems to be unable to hire appropriate creatives to write, consult, etc. for the project.

Or that the writers room made, and continues to make, space for a writer who continually does Black and queer characters dirty with his mediocre-at-best work, in both game and novel form (because, plot twist, he’s a shit writer) (1) (2) (3).

Or that the writer’s room, and specifically Ga*der, attesting that the development of the Qunari was based on Arab cultures around the time of “Medieval Europe,” which is somehow his way of getting out of the thematic botching of the Qunari language, social structure, etc. from Islamic tradition.

Or, the writers who intentionally shaped the story so that Vivienne, one of the limited number of Black women characters in the entire series to have a role as an ally, to be a red herring of an distrustful and conceited antagonist, to the point where her treatment by fandom has been incredibly racist, heinous, and lazy for years.

These are a few of MANY reasons, with thorough exposition, why the veneer of “progressive inclusion” studios like BioWare claim to be authentic. Having “diverse” writers in the room -- and I’m using that word incredibly tenuously here -- didn’t change the result of any of these harmful scenarios. In fact, it created them. This, combined with the tale as old as time: toxic fandom culture with white, anglo-centric, cisheterosexual masculinist ideals at the fore, have gotten us here.

So, do I hold all of the reasons why I am angry about Cassandra’s character writing the same way now, as I did then? No. Certainly not. In fact, there are parts where I would correct myself. On the other hand, the thesis for me remains largely preserved: I revile G*ider, I revile that he gets the accolades he does by fandom for his “diversity” of characters when he exploits, erases, and uses slippery morality to get out of admitting he has shortcomings in his work. I hate that the exaltation for representation still funnels itself onto the heads of white writers and predominantly white-staffed studios.

And, underneath it all, I am mad that some of ya’ll see no problem with that. Because what does it matter, if you do not come from communities, cultures, and coalitions that get the brunt of this misrepresentation? What does it matter if it angers a lesbian fan that the writers who have a long history of misusing and conveniently copping themselves out when they write women and queer characters, seem to use that “expertise” as permission to do what they are supposedly combating?

G*ider, the hero himself, is on written record saying that it should not be second guessed as to why Cassandra is straight, just as he thinks it should not be second guessed that Dorian is gay. Yet, when he asked on Twitter if there was some moral significance to people modding character’s sexuality (in this specific instance, Dorian, actually), G*ider said that in the end, people’s mods “do not change” what he wrote, and that unless they claim their changes “supercede” canon, there’s no harm done.

So, really, I’m just over here like -- is this ya’lls hero?

Why in the fuck would someone be modding a gay character to be bisexual or heterosexual, if they didn’t somehow believe that version “supercedes” the canon rendition? Secondly, where is the attention to the fact that, in an ensemble of multiple romanceable characters, Dorian has to be the one that has to be sexually and romantically accessible to those outside of his canonical realm of attraction?

I mean, for fuck’s sake, it’s the whole virtue grounding his companion side quest, the fact that he is estranged from his Father who tried to magically change his orientation! This is a crucial part of Dorian’s entire journey to serving the Inquisition, and serving Tevinter as a dissident.

But, you know, it doesn’t change what G*ider wrote. And he’s correct, it doesn’t change what he wrote, which he got credit, money, and esteem for. It doesn’t change that if you load up the base game, Dorian’s gay. In G*ider’s head, that is the protective force: the parts where he has ties, and not the culture of the fandom, the culture the fans who helped fill his pockets from that game have to dwell within. This isn’t revolutionary, this isn’t good-faith representation. This is getting a piece of the rotten-sweet pie and saying “let bygones be bygones, you toxic, funky heteronormative assholes!”

But, where are my manners. I’m getting heated, aren’t I?

Basically, if you condemn queer fans for calling out queer bating -- or any marginalized fan for throwing up the alarm for bullshit -- and your first reaction is to side with folks like G*ider who got theirs and said screw everything else, fuck off. Literally, fuck off. I call Cassandra’s circumstance queerbaiting because she’s one example of writers getting their cake and eating it, too. If they are so aware of just how much of their fanbase is marginalized folks, they don’t get to say they don’t have fingerprints on things like queerbaiting. You don’t get to be acclaimed and excused for the shit you say you are combating, which is the source of that acclaim. And if your claim is happy ignorance, then you definitely don’t get to blithely equivocate when fans do ask you why the story happened the way it did.

I also just want to keep in mind here that there’s a deductive conclusion to be had about this, given how La*idlaw explicitly stated they endeavored to make Cassandra extremely hot, “really enticing.” That conclusion is:

(1) Either they aren’t/weren’t nearly as attuned to their queer audiences as they generally claim to be, or

(2) They were, and had no intention of developing compassion or empathy passed G*ider talking out of his ass about why Cassandra was developed as straight. Which, ultimately, does coincide with conclusion (1) more than not.

No matter what, the contour to the conclusion is: wow, a taste of nauseating objectification, in the BioWare writer’s room. Who knew!

It’s no wild accusation to make to a writer like him and his colleagues, that they don’t know how to handle sapphic, wlw, and/or queer-related storylines, especially with women. Especially when the answer seems to be, “well, it was decided before I took the lead, and in any case, why question it! You wouldn’t question a gay character’s orientation!”

But that’s just it, you complete and utter turnip. People did question Dorian’s sexuality. People do question Dorian’s sexuality. That fantasy world of equal bearings is as insincere as it is out-of-touch. And why not, when, as you said,

it doesn’t change what you got paid for.

The ethos seems to be crudely reflexive: people’s phobic interpretations and alterations of the canon do not matter, but then again, why would you even question why a character is straight? Why would you question my narrative vision, in all of its beautiful shittery?

It’s all a game of dodge, ya’ll. Dodge, dodge, dodge. With a strong and acidic dose of vanity.

So. In summation, folks: I could care less for your false equivalences. I could care less about my contribution of queer content fucking up your good time in the meta tags. Obviously you aren’t there to actually engage in creative, exploratory thought, so why bother reasoning. There is more to the possibilities of queerbaiting than stringing along a could-be, would-be, should-be queer storyline directly. There’s knowing your audience enough to exploit your good graces with them. There’s benefitting from a charade of liberal progressive clout. There’s the ability to foresee that queer people will cathect to a given character, and not only denying an experience they could have, but denying it so harshly that the character says they can’t love yours because you’re female.

And I am so, so, so sick of these people continually enriching themselves off of the “nobody’s perfect” grace. To me, that grace is the promise of good faith, and the intention to do right by people. When that isn’t there, the grace isn’t going somewhere where it’ll be appreciated, that it will be nourished by. I mean, fucking hell, people, this is rainbow capitalism: don’t you taste it?

That’s that, then. “Cassandra and Queerbaiting Rant,” one year on. An extra dose of salt, just for the haters.

#da meta #cassandra and queerbaiting rant #one year reflection?#yeah #so #queerbaiting #cassandra pentaghast #bioware critical #bioware bullshit #cw: lesbophobia #cw: homophobia #cw: queerphobia #cw: discussion of Dorian's experiences with his family

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tentacletherapissed · 5 years ago

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Public Callout: Paradox, Blue, Jay, Bird

This is a public callout post for users Paradox (@rushifaas -- previously @mournins ; @beliisms), Blue (@divinebetrayed ; @halcyonfought), Jay (@loyalbetrayed) and Bird (@soulsbetrayed). They are active in the fandoms Persona, Fire Emblem, Pokemon, Yu-Gi-Oh, Danganronpa, Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor, Sentai, Power Rangers, and Kamen Rider.

Never in my 15 years of roleplaying have I met a group of abusers and enablers so toxic, and this post is a PSA so that I can hopefully keep others from falling into their hands. Please blacklist them ALL for your own safety, however, DO NOT ENGAGE THEM WITH HARASSMENT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

Keep in mind, Paradox’s actions are so egregious, he is already getting charges pressed against him by two different people he abused so far, and more may be on the horizon. The rest all enable this behavior and defend him despite all that he’s done to harm them and people they previously called friends. While this callout has snapshots of receipts proving our claims sprinkled in at the mention of them, for full transparency, the full comment chains will be uploaded at the end so that context for everything will be supplied, with censoring only provided for those who have nothing to do with the conflict and wish to be left out of it.

Strong trigger warning for mob mentality, mental and emotional manipulation, emotional abuse, emotional neglect, transphobia, pedophilia, ableism, and a lot more. Details under the cut. (7,300+ words, be mindful)

[Gdoc link in case Tumblr’s formatting is unreadable]

OPEN ALL LINKS AS NEW TABS, I’M SORRY TUMBLR SUCKS AT THIS

Note: Paradox claims to have Dissociative Identity Disorder, and claims to have many alters which are sometimes go by the names of Abel, Vic, Nikki, Hebel, Cain, and Ana in some of these screencaps. I will not be arguing the veracity of such claims in this callout, but for simplicity’s sake, I will be referring to everyone in his system solely by the name of “Paradox” since there is a considerable amount of confusion based on who said what and it’s not entirely clear who’s supposed to be talking in a lot of these screenshots. He also claims to have several other mental disorders like depression, anxiety, and BPD, but regardless of anyone’s mental illness, they should treat those around them with respect and kindness, which is why this callout has been made.

________________________________________________________________

MAIN EVENT - Early September 2018 / June 10th

Paradox is the ringleader of this little cult. A few months ago, he was dating my friend Nael (occasionally called Arin, Ciel, Naoya or Hevel in some of these screens). I first got alarmed about the health of their relationship during an incident in early September 2018 where Paradox threatened to commit suicide over a conflict having to do with RPing and prioritizing one blog over one he liked. [September Break Up: Singles] They broke up, but after a lot of guilt tripping from Paradox and others in his group, my friend Nael decided to get back together with him. Even though I had a lot of misgivings about the situation, I told Nael that I respected their decision and wouldn’t pressure them either way. [Scout and Nael: 12, 13]

Months went by, and I didn’t hear much due to specifically asking Nael not to tell me about their significant other and that group of friends, but things were going downhill. There were many more fights over roleplaying and shipping, some of which Blue and Jay expressed concern about privately, especially since it seemed Paradox himself was ignoring his other lover Kieran for Nael. [For Me: 13, 15, 16]

Paradox’s behavior continued worsening until it came to a head in mid March 2019. Blue and Nael were getting invested in an rp campaign I was running on a private server. When Nael showed off a picture they drew portraying their character, Paradox became extremely upset at them. After a solid week of enduring abuse from their lover [Abel Suicide: 1, 2, 6], it eventually culminated in Paradox apparently trying to take his own life after Nael attempted to break off their relationship. [Abel Suicide: 22, 23, 24] Nael was able to contact their mutual partner Kieran (sometimes called Kie or Vampy in screens) so that he could send the police to Paradox’s home and he would be rushed to the hospital. [Nael: 11]

Nael has multiple health issues that include heart disease and problems with their brain, and was so traumatized by the experience, they had to go to the hospital themselves [Nael: 19, 20 ; Before / After Suicide: 43]. Because I was terrified at the possibility of Nael dying from the escalating nature of their toxic relationship, I urged them to go through with the breakup. Nael decided to take my advice and broke up with Paradox and Kieran on a group chat while on a screenshared call with me and another friend who wishes to remain nameless. [Before / After Suicide: 46]

Blue was at first on board for the breakup and supportive of Nael’s decision [Blue Agrees: Singles] but at the persuasion of Jay decided to believe Paradox’s story when he said Nael had misrepresented what he said when he told Nael he would probably drop Blue due to the breakup. [Copy of Group DM: Full] Keep in mind, we have the FULL attempted suicide dropbox [Abel Suicide: Full], and the breakup conversation including Paradox’s abusive behavior before the attempted suicide attempt. [Before/After Suicide: Full] Much of what Paradox says are blatant falsehoods. In addition, Kieran (Vampy) no longer agrees with the things he has said to support Paradox’s argument and says he was pressured to agree with everything, even if it didn’t feel right.

So instead of making it clear to either of us that Blue no longer considered us friends, she instead gave us the silent treatment and leaked what I vented to her in confidence to Paradox behind my back. She only admitted to doing this when I confronted her after finding a vague post Paradox made that used the exact same wording. [Scout vs Blue: 1, 3, 4] I was extra furious with her because Paradox was making it sound as if it was Nael saying those words when in fact they had no idea what I said to her and was highly distraught when they found out about the vague post. Her excuse was that she didn’t think we would find out. [Scout vs Blue: 7, 9]

This is a common theme with their relationship that shows the extent of how complicit Blue is with Paradox’s abusive behavior. Due to her once close relationship with Nael, she often served as the “bait” to bring Nael back, agreeing that the relationship is unhealthy at first [With Blue: 12] only to go back to heaping abuse on Nael for leaving and trying to persuade them to come back [Nael’s Last Conversation with Blue: Full].

By then, Nael had already blocked everyone else in the cult-like group except Blue due to a promise they’d made to her, and she abused this trust right away by pulling Nael into a group chat so that everyone could yell at them. [Scout vs Blue: 10, 11] IF YOU BECOME A PART OF THIS GROUP, THIS IS WHAT YOU CAN LOOK FORWARD TO. If you do anything to provoke Paradox’s ire, you will be subjected to a firing squad full of people yelling at you for whatever you did. You will not have a chance to defend yourself, only grovel for forgiveness until they decide they’re through with you. Nael and other members of the group have been subjected to it many times.

Unfortunately, there are no surviving screencaps of this particular dispute, but I do have the one I was involved with. More on that later.

Eventually Nael left and blocked Blue so that they couldn’t be added back to get yelled at more. For the sake of our RP, we agreed upon a peaceable way to continue the server RP [Scout vs Blue: 12, 13, 14, 15, 16] but Blue eventually exited that too [Scout vs Blue: 17]. During the three or so weeks they were split apart, Paradox vagued continuously about us, copied our behavior and prior ships he had with Nael with others currently in his cult, and sent Nael threatening and unstable messages [“Goodbye, Nael”: Single]. While behind their back, he was privately making light of the situation and even made bets with his stooges about when Nael would return [Betting: Singles].

Here’s where I have to put an important disclaimer: During Nael’s time away from the main cult, we both would snoop on his and Blue’s blogs to see if they had mentioned us. Also, during the period immediately after Blue sold me out to Paradox, I became enraged and sent him a pretty angry message [Scout Loses Their Mind: Single], commented on one of his posts, and indirectly threatened them with my popularity compared to theirs in the community I was in. All of those things were the direct result of piss poor decision making and I apologize for my behavior, because it was simply not right to do, no matter who I thought I was defending. Though the blog snooping continued, I thankfully sent no more harassing messages to anyone from the group once Blue indicated she wanted a clean break from us, and no vaguing messages were made on either of our blogs.

Worse still, I privately speculated if this latest suicide attempt Paradox had gone through was “real” or not, which is totally unacceptable. Though I was just concerned about my friend and worried that this might have been another attempt to manipulate them, all threats of suicide should be treated seriously and the proper authorities contacted, PERIOD, regardless of how “serious” the threat might seem. I definitely agree with Nael’s decision to contact the authorities as it was happening, and I’m relieved to know another life wasn’t tragically lost, no matter what my situation is with Paradox after the fact.

Now, with that out of the way… Eventually, Paradox was able to get through to Nael by convincing them that I had lied about a certain mental disorder he was assumed to have. This is all despite me never having said he didn’t have it as I do NOT have the medical condition described and am NOT a medical professional. Paradox willingly passed medical records through a mutual friend [Consent: Single] that Nael initially found convincing but has recently come to doubt. Note: PLEASE NEVER DO THIS, OBVIOUSLY.

Paradox then convinced Nael to pretend to be my friend for a little longer so that he could lure me into a groupchat under the impression that I was defending him from all his former friends. Here is the entire chat almost in its entirety (a few glitches in captures results in a few repeats and nearly 4 minutes straight of lost content), with screenshots proudly taken by BLUE [Her Discord Drop: Single], who played an instrumental role in helping it happen. While I would encourage everyone to read it in its entirety, please be warned that the amount of abuse I endured is very troubling. [Scout Trap: Full]

Please note that Nael (Hevel), Kieran (Ghostie), and Dave have all come to me and personally apologized to me for their role participating in that group chat and we are friends now. But at the time due to this traumatic experience, my friendship with Nael was officially ended. Even though I was worried sick about them, I knew they couldn’t be saved until they saw Paradox’s abusive behavior for what it was on their own. And of course, after a brief honeymoon period, the abuse started again. (Keep in mind, I wasn’t in contact with Nael or anyone else for most of these, so I’m not as familiar about what happened and when.)

The first sign of trouble started on April 16th, not even two full weeks after I had been "defeated". Once again, it was over RP drama, where Paradox became upset at his two lovers Nael and Kieran for shipping with anyone besides him [Initial Ship Drama: 6], even though he usually continues multishipping on his blog with certain people when he pleases. [With Blue: 2] He complained about this endlessly. [Random Paradox Screen]

He continuously gaslit Kieran for about a week, cycling between saying he was going to leave forever [Initial Ship Drama: 9], telling the Kieran to take care of Nael [Initial Ship Drama: 10, 27], giving conflicting directions [Initial Ship Drama: 22, 38], putting himself down so Kieran would feel compelled to console him [Initial Ship Drama: 30, 41, 58], and asking them not to try to pursue romance with him [Initial Ship Drama: 12, 13, 32, 63], only to flip around and say that the idea of romancing them makes him feel “happy”, so he will [Initial Ship Drama: 45, 46], then become upset when either one of them indicated they might need space to either think or just live life like normal. [Initial Ship Drama: 53] Really, the entire thing has to be seen to be believed. [Initial Ship Drama: Full]

Eventually, Paradox’s behavior got so bad that once again, Blue expressed dissatisfaction with his behavior [With Blue: 4], but apparently it wasn’t enough to dissuade her from luring Nael into yet another trap to be yelled at barely a month later on May 17th. [May 17th: Full]

Confusingly, the reason behind this collective thrashing was that Nael actually overcorrected too much and tried to do more stuff with Paradox, only to be called clingy and possessive when they did. Then, when Paradox told Nael he didn’t want to RP with them anymore, Nael tried to respect his decision and not get involved with group RPs that Paradox was involved with so there would be no pressure either way. This was then held up as an example as to why they were “isolating” themselves from the group. Paradox showed the screencaps to others in the group with very little context to get them riled up and angry at Nael so that they’d be on board to yell at them, again showing his willingness to twist someone’s words to make them a convenient villain, no matter what they do to try to appease him.

Then on May 24th, there was the supposed “death” of the alter “Abel”, (who has since returned yet again). [Paradox: 2] The source of all this drama was that Blue simply mentioned a ship that she was continuing with Nael during a period of time Paradox wasn’t at all receptive to the idea of them interacting. Blue freely admitted to being the source of this conflict in private [With Blue: 21], but had no problem letting Nael take the brunt of the abuse. Once again, she is complicit for enabling actions she knows are wrong and hurtful, judging by the way she expresses concern about them, as long as she’s not the one in the eye of the storm.

Following this conflict, Nael started having serious second thoughts. After getting yelled at yet again about something they didn’t even cause, they had to go to the hospital for a near suicide attempt due to all the stress of being repeatedly attacked by someone they thought they could trust.

After they got out again, they were pulled into a smaller group chat with the newly formed “Paradox” alter as well as Jay, where it was demanded he answer for the wrongful death of an alter that has since returned. Multiple times, Paradox held up the incident from September, (which was over 9 months prior!) as to why Nael was to blame for Blue’s actions this time. [Paradox: 8, 10] Paradox even told Nael, someone who had been in the hospital just a few short hours ago [Paradox: 5], that their “suicide held no meaning to him”. [Paradox: 32] All of this despite the fact that they had talked about the very same ship on May 6th! [Proof Abel Knew: 10 total]

This was also supposed to serve as yet another “My heart is telling me not to get in a relationship with you” conversation -- a breakup convo, and one their third lover, Kieran, hadn’t even initially been invited to. [Paradox: 59] It was mostly just Paradox yelling at Nael with Jay usually only chiming in to agree with or heap praise on Paradox. [Paradox: 67] Several times, Paradox made confusing reversals, at one point musing “another alter might come and love you again” [Paradox: 49] to going back to insisting they could never be together again [Paradox: 70], then accusing Nael of saying they don’t love him [Paradox: 45, 46]. You might remember this erratic pattern from his conversation with Kieran back in April. This is gaslighting in its purest and ugliest form.

Clearly after this, Nael was rattled and eventually decided to leave. Instead of making any sort of formal goodbye, they just decided to delete their old Discord and make a clean break so there was no way they could be dragged into another group chat and yelled at. The group quickly fell into chaos once again. Paradox quickly began pumping out venting vague posts on his personal and RP blogs, sometimes pitying himself over the way Nael had apparently treated him [Single: Singles], and sometimes outright wishing death on them. [Paradox die: Single] Before long, he cracked and started sending desperate messages to Nael directly despite Nael obviously not wanting to talk. [Paradox Desperation: Singles] And when that didn’t work, of course Blue was deployed to try to persuade them to come back. [Last Convo w/ Blue: 22 pages] Luckily Dave warned them beforehand. [Thanks, Dave!: Single]

To try to convince others in the group that Nael was the bad guy and needed to be stopped, Paradox began feeding lies to his followers about bad stuff Nael was apparently doing. Paradox told Dave that Nael had been badmouthing him behind his back. But when Dave went to confront Nael about their behavior, Nael provided proof that was in fact Blue saying bad things about Dave. That’s when Dave decided to leave, too.

More chaos happened within the group. Soon after, Kieran the supposed third in their relationship got tired of Paradox constantly saying how Nael was “the only person he could ever love” as well as the constant torrent of irrational behavior and abuse. [Paradox Flipping Out: Single] So he left, as well. Aside from many, many more aggressive venting and vague posts, nothing much new has happened as far as group dynamics.

So far Paradox has been mostly fixated on Nael’s absence, but without the contributions of everyone who left, this callout wouldn’t be possible, and they should all be commended for their efforts and their courage for coming to me to apologize personally for their part in the abuse I and others have suffered.

As terrible as Paradox’s behavior has been in this retelling of events, mostly centered around Nael’s situation, it’s really only scratching the surface of how toxic this group is. There are many smaller details and other people he’s hurt that couldn’t fit in this brief recap, so here are a few more things you should know about that will hopefully keep you from this toxic group of friends.

First I’ll talk about the accounts of people who used to be in the group and go into detail about all the people who are still backing Paradox up despite everything he’s done.

________________________________________________________________

PARTIES INVOLVED

- Other victims -

Kieran:

While Nael took the lion’s share of the abuse from Paradox, it’s important to remember that he was involved with two different people and treated them both badly. Paradox is an outstanding example of what NOT to do when in a polyamorous relationship.

While there was a brief month long period where everything seemed fine after they started dating on October 23rd, Paradox began heavily playing favorites towards Nael, a pattern that only seemed to get worse over time. Kieran was subjected to long periods of neglect from his lover with Paradox only seeming to remember he existed when he was trying to use Kieran against Nael. Even Blue and Jay noticed this when the relationship was just starting out and rightfully called it out, though only in the safety of a private chat. [For Me: 13, 15, 16]

Several times during their relationship, when Nael would mess up or try to leave, Paradox would say that Nael was “the only person he could love” (he even wrote a diary about it!) [Copy of Journal: 2 pages] and break things off with Kieran as well. Most of the time without even telling him. However whenever he was trying to condemn Nael about something, he would hold up Kieran to say “What you’re doing is hurting US”, often without Kieran’s consent.

Of course, Kieran was still subjected to the same amount of lies, gaslighting, emotional blackmail, and mental instability from Paradox that Nael had to endure, but the fact is that he was also basically used as a weapon against someone he cared about by someone who was supposed to care about them both EQUALLY.

Ruby:

Ruby is someone who’s been fighting a personal battle with Paradox for years, starting with a dispute that happened, of course, because of an argument about a fictional character. For the past year and a half as of writing this (the harassment started Nov 2017, it is currently July 2019), Paradox has been stalking her blogs and harassing her over this perceived slight. He lied about her to all her friends in an attempt to alienate her from the public, and we have a confession from Nael that says not only was Paradox guilty of sending tons of anon hate towards Ruby even after they had each other blocked, he would send other people (Nael included) to send anon hate after her.

I briefly intervened during this dispute on Nael’s behalf in November 2018 because during that time we were both lead to believe that Ruby was targeting both Paradox and Nael. This is despite the fact that the post Paradox was upset about wasn’t even about him and she barely even knew Nael even existed. Thanks to my help, I was able to negotiate a brief ceasefire that lasted a few months up until Nael’s separation from Paradox in March.

The stalking and harassment started up again as soon as I had been branded an enemy, and eventually it got so bad that Ruby was the first (but not the only) one to announce she is going to try to press charges against everyone still remaining in the group. Although we don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things, and she’s done and said things that were unintentionally hurtful, she has been very receptive to feedback and has made great pains to change for the better. I support Ruby wholeheartedly in her endeavors to make the ones abusing her pay for what they’ve done. If you want to know a little more about her conflict with Paradox from her perspective, visit her page. [Ruby’s page of Receipts: Full]

- Part of Paradox’s group -

Blue:

Out of all the people on this list, Blue is the most disappointing aspect of all this, seeing as I considered her my friend even before Nael came along. We’d been friends for more than a year by the time the March Madness started, meeting somewhere around February 2018. She was the one who introduced me to Nael in the first place, and Nael was so close to her they called each other their long lost siblings.

Unfortunately for all of us, Blue can’t stand up to a bully who insults and abuses her friends, even if she knows what he’s doing is wrong. We have multiple screenshots showing instances where she admits that Paradox is in the wrong or being annoying or excessively guilt tripping others based on trivial matters. However, whenever she’s personally on the hook for getting targeted by the ones she calls her “friends”, she quickly falls into line.

The second Paradox asks her to jump, she asks “How high?” She’s been willingly used as bait to rope Nael back into situations she knows and has even admitted are super unhealthy for them, all because she’s too afraid of being the next one everyone turns on. The only time she shows any semblance of ��courage” is when she’s backed up by the rest of the hivemind. She’s too afraid to speak for herself, often parroting what others have already written in a desperate attempt to show external strength and total fealty for her master.

I have to wonder what exactly it is that keeps bringing Blue back to him, even though we have an entire folder showing times where she has come to her own conclusions that Paradox is unhealthy to be around [With Blue: 24 total] and has a penchant for blaming her whenever his relationship with his two lovers ever took a downwards turn. [Paradox blaming Blue: Singles] It’s not my place to speculate, but it’s safe to say that with all the times she’s personally let me, Nael, and others in our group down, there’s no way in hell we’re giving her another chance. She has made her choice to stay with someone she knew to be an abuser and emotional manipulator -- someone who hurt her and her friends -- and she will have to live with that decision.

Bird:

Ruby’s situation with Bird is very much like my situation with Blue, made all the worse by the fact that they were actually dating at the time. Bird purposefully sold Ruby out to Paradox while claiming they weren’t in contact, all the while she was feeding all of Ruby’s words and private thoughts to him. This is a common theme with this group and why you can’t be friends with just one of them if you don’t want to be involved with the cult as a whole.

Eventually she was found out and hasn’t really bothered to hide the fact that she’s on Paradox’s team ever since. We also have screenshots of her calling Nael a brat and useless during conflicts Paradox started, like the shipping drama in September. [Misc Bird Folder: 9 total] [Ruby and Bird’s Breakup: 16 total]

Jay:

Now we get to the biggest sycophant of the entire group, Jay. She’s been the one by his side the longest -- for a whopping 4 years -- and one of his most ardent supporters and biggest enablers. While I didn’t know much about her at first, seeing as she was largely absent from what I affectionately call the “six-person beat down”, she’s an invaluable member of Paradox’s cult and basically functions as his right arm and messenger.

If you have a problem with Paradox and want to talk things over with him, he’ll usually insist upon bringing Jay as an “impartial judge”. Not surprisingly, she usually just ends up agreeing with whatever he says and pushing his narrative, all the while insisting she’s being unbiased. She will lie for him, rope cult members attempting to leave back with excuses for his inexcusable behavior, and always swallows whatever lie he has to say wholeheartedly. If he needs a message from Abel passed on to someone trying to persuade them to come back, she’ll deliver it gladly. But if you need her to send a message to him, she’ll curtly tell you not to have her “fight your battles.”

She tried to send an entire drop box of “evidence” to Dave attempting to prove Nael was manipulative and evidence of the alter “Hebel's” existence. In it, Paradox (or rather, his alter Hebel) admitted to trying to spur Nael to kill themselves so that “Hebel” could apparently take over and get Kieran all to himself. [Potential Manslaughter: Singles] All of this was sent as proof that NAEL was the bad guy BY Jay, which is truly mind boggling and shows how far gone she is with regards to him.

There is a woman in prison the very moment that I’m writing this for spurring her suicidal boyfriend to take his own life [Article], and yet Jay thinks this behavior is okay? And before anyone tries to say that Hebel is “technically” to blame for attempting to push Nael to suicide, this argument hasn’t worked in the courtroom since the 1970s! [Article] IF PARADOX’S ALTER IS A DANGER TO NAEL AND CAN’T BE CONTROLLED, PARADOX HIMSELF IS ALSO DANGEROUS. PERIOD.

This isn’t even mentioning the multiple times she’s seen Paradox himself or his other various "good" alters (everyone in the group has seen, in fact) tell Nael outright that he “wishes [they] would die” [Abel Vent: Single] and that their suicide “holds no meaning to him” [Paradox: 32]. Jay was supposed to be “mediating” the very conversation where Paradox -- not “Hebel” or anyone else -- said that to Nael! And she said NOTHING. Her silence is complicity and she should take the blame for being such an ardent supporter of his abusive behavior.

Amazingly, there’s even MORE awful things that this group (particularly, but not exclusively Paradox) that I didn’t have any space to discuss in the callout itself, but they can’t go unmentioned. I know this is already super long, so I’ll try to run through them all as quickly as possible, and then we can get to the large wealth of screenshots we have linked at the end, where everything is in context for you to browse at your convenience.

________________________________________________________________

OTHER OCCURENCES

Transphobia: Paradox is a terf, and there’s not much else to say. [For Me: 2] Ironically he said this in a group chat with one of the only two people who identify as trans in their group, his then-boyfriend Kieran. Here’s him heavily fetishizing a failed attempted Corrin muse that he described as intersex, too. [FE Abel Problems: 5 pages] (In parenthesis is a user attempting to check their work. He makes a bit of an error concerning outrealms and dragon gates and whatnot, but please forgive him for those small errors considering how much he had on his hands.)

Abuse victim blaming: Paradox would often tell his two lovers, who are survivors of various types of abuse, ranging from mental, physical, and even sexual, how it’s their fault for letting their past traumas affect them. [Victim Blaming: Singles] Please note that these screenshots were taken in May, nearly a month before they separated from him fully, so they would have no reason to lie to each other about the things he said or needlessly malign his character before they left.

Promoting infighting: Paradox enjoyed watching his underlings tear each other apart for his amusement or to influence their behavior by saying their actions affected “everyone” despite him using false pretenses to get them to fight in the first place. He lied to Dave about Nael comparing him to a user that he wasn’t fond of when it was really Paradox and Blue that had done it. He also lied to Kieran and the entire group to get them all to yell at Nael in a group chat about Nael trying to isolate themselves from everyone when it was really done to please Paradox.

Ableism: Nael is unwell and has brain conditions they don’t feel comfortable with sharing. Instead of being understanding and supportive of them occasionally not understanding things or forgetting things, Paradox would immediately use it as a weapon against them. When “Paradox” first surfaced, Nael claimed that it wasn’t fair to them that the “Abel” alter yelled at them for forgetting about their ship with Blue. Paradox immediately countered that he Nael would no longer be allowed to use the excuse that they forgot things to AVOID being yelled at for minor things. [Paradox: 21, 22] He would constantly do things like this while they were together.

Copying and stealing OCs: Besides stalking the people that left and that he’s grown to hate, Paradox also has a peculiar habit of copying their activities on his blog with the few remaining people in his circle. For example, back in March when Nael’s Grima muse began interacting with a Reyson rper I introduced them to, Paradox made Kieran pick up his abandoned Reyson muse so that he could ship him with his Robin. (This hasn’t been linked to protect the identity of the second Reyson.) Worse still, Paradox has even outright stolen characters and backstories from those that leave. Here Kieran tries to ask Jay to tell Paradox to stop using some of his stolen OCs and she questions why it “would matter” to Kieran before promptly telling him to basically take a hike and blocking him. [Jay: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5]

Racism: This group seems to relish in their own ignorance when it comes to matters of race. Here are screenshots Dave took where he discussed Paradox saying that Japanese people are white. [No, seriously: Singles] (Please note the dates -- it was back in December, so he has no reason to lie.) Here’s Nael recounting a time Paradox told them that, because they were partially North African, they had to distance themselves from people of their race because other people would only see them as a terrorist. (No caps of that since it was in a call, so feel free to take it with a grain of salt.) Here’s Blue telling me, a black fan, that unintentional racism in a game I enjoyed but was put off by “didn’t matter” and that there was no need for me to “get so salty about it”. [Scout vs Blue: 19, 20] While I don’t think they’re going to any Klan meetings over the weekend, it’s still a bit concerning and something POC muns should be aware of because they can be startlingly insensitive at times.

Pedophilia: Probably the hardest one to talk about for me personally, but definitely one of the most serious. While I must stress that we haven’t noticed any sort of untoward behavior with underaged USERS thus far, Paradox shows an almost unhealthy fascination with underage MUSES that might be off putting to some people and may spell danger. This actually isn’t the first callout someone has made about his behavior. In 2018 while he went by the name “Vic” and was in the Pokemon fandom, he wrote a disturbing post where a 14 year old girl was killed by a literal penis monster that was saying “penetrate” as it ran her through the middle.

Though the mun was fine with their muse dying, the obvious sexual connotations of the post left them feeling uneasy. When they went to approach him about this, instead of apologizing, he got defensive and said that because it was fictional, it didn’t matter. Later he made a bizarre case arguing that because the girl was 14 and thus had presumably experienced puberty, it couldn’t TECHNICALLY be considered pedophilia. [WTF: Single] Which, while correct on only the most technical of terms, flies in the face of all reason. Here’s the full PSA about him back then [Paradox PSA], and screenshots he was booted out of for his terrible behavior. [Paradox Booted: Singles] (His then-lover initially tried to defend him, but his abusive behavior eventually drove them away as well, so care was taken to keep them anonymous.)

Most disturbing of all, though, is a smut drabble that he made this year concerning one of his newer muses, Momo. On his blog, he describes Momo as someone who is “physically” 18 but “actually” seven due to the circumstances of his creation. That would be fine, except he will often portray Momo as also being mentally seven years old even though he continues to write him lewdly. In the smut drabble, he even goes a step further and constantly refers to him as a “child” and constantly fixates on his underdeveloped genitals.

DUE TO THE HIGHLY GRAPHIC AND POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING NATURE OF THIS DRABBLE, DO NO CLICK UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED. It’s honestly not for the faint of the heart and makes me queasy from the first sentence, but there’s no other way to describe the severity of his awful nature unless you experience it for yourself. [To Endure a Fiend’s Heat: full 6 page drabble]

While some would say it’s okay to experience triggering material in a safe environment to potentially help ease the pain of past trauma, Paradox has already shown himself to be unreliable when it comes to respecting the mental health and safety of others, and though we don’t have any screenshots of this, Nael has recounted several times where Paradox said he was sexually excited by RPing his childlike muses having sex with the adult muses of others in the cult. Here's him once again emphasizing the child like element with one and then drawing them in a suggestive "pin up" pose immediately after. [Vector: Singles]

________________________________________________________________

Finally we are at our end. Once again, my purpose behind this callout is not to shame anyone with a particular mental illness or unique set of challenges. Paradox is dangerous to any community he’s in because of his view of other people as simple playthings that he can use and throw away as he pleases. He treats life as an RP, living people as muses, and his apparent mental illnesses as an excuse to do away with any sort of accountability for his actions, and it is simply NOT ACCEPTABLE. Please protect yourself and others by reblogging this -- I feel as though Nael is very lucky to have escaped this situation with his life. Informing others might save another’s.

Complete, unedited list of references, roughly in the order of mention:

(Please note that anything labeled “Single(s)” will not have an entry here, as those are the only screenshots we have about them. We got better about capping things as time went on.)

[Scout and Nael Convo: 13 total] When Nael decided to get back together with Paradox the first time in September 2018, I let them know my concerns, but told them I respected their decision, no matter if I agreed with it or not. Looking back, parts of this conversation feel almost prophetic.

[Didn’t Feel Like…: 9 total] One of Kieran’s first conversations with Paradox. Watch closely how he characterizes the incident in September. He also mentions that his trauma and BPD makes him a sexual fiend, which… idk how others in the community would feel about that.

[For me: 16 total] A loose collection of screenshots Kieran took that shows quite a few odd moments during his time in the cult. That includes Paradox being a terf, Paradox insisting that Kieran to stay with Nael if they broke up (which is something he criticized Nael for suggesting in the March break up, even though Nael only said it once), and Jay and Blue expressing concern for Kieran when Paradox was starting to neglect him back in January. PLEASE MIND THE DATES! They vary page to page sometimes!

[Before/After Suicide: 88 total] A few screenshots showing the tumultuous times immediately before and after the Paradox suicide attempt in March 2019. Afterwards, Nael breaks up with both Paradox and Kieran in no uncertain terms due to the trauma he faced.

[Abel Suicide: 33 total] Paradox’s infamous suicide attempt.

[Nael: 34 total] Nael and Kieran talk as Paradox’s suicide attempt is in progress, and Nael tells Kieran to get the police. Sensitive information blotted out for obvious reasons.

[Scout vs Blue: 25 total] A collection of the conflicts I’ve dealt with in regards to Blue since the incident in March. Also includes her racial insensitivity and back when she agreed with me and Nael before Paradox lied to her.

[Initial Ship Drama: 93 total] Kieran endures like 5 days of nonstop gaslighting from Paradox. At the end (Around page 88) he manipulates Kieran into sparking a confrontation with Nael, telling him to “be assertive” about fixing a problem Paradox caused with his erratic behavior.

[Proof Abel Knew: 10 total] On May 6th, Nael discussed with Paradox or one of his alters about the ship that triggered the May 24th meltdown. Paradox also says that having any ships, including ones that he doesn’t even have to see is unacceptable simply because they exist. He then blames Nael for something Blue brought up. Again. While asking Nael not to blame him for something Blue has done.

[With Blue: 24 total] Kieran talks with Blue about the aforementioned shipping drama, and she immediately expresses frustration and anger with Paradox blowing the whole thing out of proportion. Later she also expresses annoyance with the May 24th incident of the alter “Abel” “dying” due to even more ship drama.

[May 17th: 13 total] Once again, Paradox whips his followers up into a frenzy over Nael, who’s really just trying to do what they were told and prioritize their lover. When they’re told the amount of attention Paradox literally asked for is stifling, they back off, only to be yelled at for it once again. It’s not shown here, but Blue once again acted as a lure to bring Nael into a public flogging.

[Paradox: 72 total] Nael is blamed for the “death” of an alter that has since returned because the alter “wasn’t around” for something they discussed on the 6th of May. This is the introduction to the “Paradox” alter, that I’m assuming now has assumed a fronting role. I don’t really care if that situation has changed since I started writing this.

[Jay: 12 total] Just some screens of Jay kind of being a jerk (mostly in the first set). She won’t tell Paradox to stop stealing someone else’s OCs and stop improperly using Nael’s last name, which is considered legitimate identity theft in France, where he lives! Mind the dates.

[Last Convo w/ Blue: 22 pages] Blue reprises her role as the bait to try to drag Nael back, but they’ve wised up to her game by now. It’s not going to ever work again.

[Jay’s “Evidence” Folder: 122 total] All of the things Jay sent to Dave in order to convince him that Nael was the bad guy. None of it accomplishes that goal. In it there’s a lot of doting between Nael’s alter “Naoya” and Paradox’s alter “Abel”, before Paradox showed the exact same abusive behavior and drove Naoya away as well. Then Paradox’s alter “Hebel” tries to explain his existence. He also admits to attempted manslaughter. So. (Please note: some of these are out of order, and we’re very sorry about this, but it’s not our doing, sorry!)

[Ruby and Bird’s Breakup: 16 total] Ruby tried to get Bird to intervene on her behalf to get Paradox to stop harassing her after she tried making an apology post. Bird totally flaked out, probably due to her dual loyalties to Paradox himself. This spurred a messy breakup between them both.

[Misc Bird Folder: 9 total] Some more random stuff showing Bird and Ruby’s relationship, including her take on Paradox and Nael’s September breakup, where she calls him a “brat”. The entire time during these screenshots, Bird was secretly feeding information to Paradox against Ruby’s will, breaking her trust when she found out. She even told Paradox, Ruby’s abuser, about the new blog Ruby made in order to escape him. That’s why she’s on this callout.

[Discord Server Chat with Blue: 23 pages] The complete chat about the Fire Emblem Heroes event that left me feeling upset about the handling of race in Book 2. While the rest in the server try to be respectful or change the subject, Blue insisted on devaluing my feelings and saying I was accusing her of racism, which was, of course, untrue at the time. Currently, I’m not feeling so generous. (Note: My apologies to fans of Heroes’ Nifl -- I say some strongly worded things here which may be unflattering, but I felt it was important to get the entire conversation down.)

BONUS: [Paradox Guilt Tripping on his birthday: 16 total] In case you needed more evidence of Paradox’s gaslighting behavior, here is him guilt tripping them because Nael, who is not a native English speaker, didn’t understand one video he sent. If this is all it takes to trigger a breakdown, he is probably not ready for a relationship.

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ks-caster · 5 years ago

Text

One Last

Fandom: One Piece

Characters: Tashigi, Zoro, Strawhats

Notes: This story centers on the idea that Tashigi looks like Kuina because she’s basically inhabiting her body - the corpse was reanimated through science. Discovering that she’s basically a zombie, Tashigi attempts to kill herself, only to fail repeatedly due to her excellent design. She is adopted/kidnapped by the strawhats and attempts to deal with her ensuing depression and identity crisis.

First chapter and outline are under the cut.

Roranoa Zoro was having a very bad day. He had gotten lost and had to ask for directions three times in the so far, as he wandered around on the rather uninteresting spring island, where they had docked to resupply. He had been searching for most of the morning, and still hadn’t been successful at locating a good bar that sold drinks for less than the ridiculous prices being charged everywhere he looked. He had run into Luffy twice, who was also short on cash, and looking just as unsuccessfully for cheap food. He had failed to convince Nami that three-hundred percent interest was unfair. He had been forced to knock out a troop of Navy goons and a police-man. He didn’t know what he wanted more: a drink or a nap.

Roranoa Zoro was having a very bad day, and in the course of half a second as he caught sight of a particular face, it got a whole lot worse.

“Hello Zoro,” Tashigi greeted him civilly, if perhaps with a degree of frostiness that he assumed meant she wished she has her sword with her. Her Shigure was nowhere in sight, and she was dressed in a pink and gold sundress that looked like it had been sewn out of an enormous handkerchief. It had one strap over her right shoulder, and came down to either just above or just below her knees, depending on which part of the uneven hemline was being measured.

She was wearing high-heeled strappy sandals much like Nami’s and she looked a lot prettier than he remembered. He blinked hard.

“Hello, Navy girl,” he responded a bit more waspishly than he had intended. She looked at him disconcertingly over the tops of her glasses.

“Are you busy?” she inquired unexpectedly. He shook his head, a bit thrown. She jerked her thumb toward a bar and grill behind her.

“Come and have a drink with me then,” she invited, sounding rather offhand.

“Uh,” he started, unsure what to make of her weird change in character.

“My treat,” she offered, slightly altering the angle of her head and the shape of her eyes until her expression conveyed that she really did want him to have a drink with her.

“Alright then,” he responded guardedly, just as Nami and Robin strode up, arms full of shopping bags from clothing stores.

“Oh hey Zoro!” exclaimed Nami, “come over here and help us carry these!”

“Not now!” he shouted in irritation.

“Oh, are you busy?” Nami all but squealed, noticing Tashigi for the first time, but apparently not recognizing her.

“We were just going for a drink!” Tashigi called to her. “Come join us, if you like. I’m buying.”

Nami did like; free drinks were always categorized under ‘like,’ and Robin brought up the rear as the four of them filed into the restaurant.

To general surprise, the rest of the crew was already seated at a large corner table, Luffy scarfing down snacks like there was no tomorrow, and Sangi flirting with a curly-haired barmaid. Tashigi strode over to them and plopped down in an empty chair, and Zoro, Nami and Robin took their seats as well.

“Hey,” Tashigi called to a man who appeared to be in charge. She handed him a stack of bills and told him to take anything they all ate or drank from that money until it ran out, and then cut them off.

“Whoa, really?” exclaimed Luffy.

“When it’s gone, it’s gone though,” she warned him.

“Hey, thanks lady!” he said with a grin, and after that, there was a scramble of everyone placing orders so they’d get what they wanted before Luffy ate his weight in Tashigi’s gift money. Zoro wasn’t shy about ordering a whole keg; after all, regardless of her motives, he planned on having his much-wanted drink now that he had the opportunity.

Tashigi didn’t seem to mind either, because when they had emptied the keg, she ordered another, and then a third. She, Zoro, Nami and Sangi all got rather tipsy, and Luffy Chopper and Usopp, though drinking soda, were acting equally silly, with chopsticks up Chopper’s nose as per usual, and Sangi trying to get Robin to drink more. Robin, oddly considering she was drinking the same beverage as Tashigi, Zoro, Nami and Sangi, did not seem any different than usual.

“So what’s with the free booze?” Zoro asked, much more warmly now that the party atmosphere had gotten into his blood with the alcohol.

“I didn’t feel like drinkin’ alone,” the naval officer slurred as though it were the most obvious thing in the world, raising her mug a bit shakily to toast.

“And you’re not arresting us because…?” Robin prompted, sipping daintily at her drink.

“I’m on vacation,” Tashigi replied, waving her hand around nonchalantly, “so I don’t have to, and I couldn’t if I wanted to andIdon’twanttosothere! Cheers to the yummy food!”

“Here, here!” bellowed Luffy, Usopp and Sangi, and everything continued as before, with Nami absently counting up what their refreshments cost and wondering just how much Tashigi had forked over if they hadn’t been cut off yet. The only noticeable difference was that Robin suddenly seemed as drunk as any of them, and thus the one party-pooper was now part of the fun.

Time flew by and the sun climbed to its zenith. Nobody asked what their balance was, though really, the money had to run out some time, didn’t it?

Did it?

Luffy was in the middle of stuffing his face when the bartender finally came over looking slightly uncomfortable. He hadn’t even finished speaking when Tashigi whipped out her wallet.

“Another round!” she bellowed, thoroughly soused, and rather shakily threw it, only to have it caught by Zoro.

“Hold up a minute,” he cautioned, his voice not entirely steady either, but apparently more able to hold his liquor than his companion. “Don’t spend every cent!”

“Why not?” she wined, face flushed and mouth firmly pouting. Her glasses were a little askew, and to Zoro’s surprise, he saw that a pin was lose in her hair, letting a long black lock fall down almost to her elbow.

“You have long hair?” he asked, distracted.

“Yup,” she replied, completely forgetting the matter of the money. “A bit bending of the ol’ regulations and all that, but…” her eyes drifted to Luffy and Chopper, who were dancing on the tabletop. “I didn’t see them drink at all,” she mused.

“They don’t need to,” Zoro groused. “Everyone on this crew can act drunk on a moment’s notice without drinking anything stronger than lemonade. Well, except Robin.” The two of them stared as Robin and Nami were trying to make a house of cards out of the menus, laughing madly and building more out of Robin’s hands than anything else.

“Huh,” Tashigi grunted. “Well, I bet no one’s ever bored, at least.” Abruptly she stood, handed the bartender a fat tip.

“Thanks for the grub and booze,” she said amiably, and turned to the pirate crew, who mostly acknowledged her, if perhaps distractedly. After deliberating for a time and starting and stopping a few times to speak, she finally came out with, “Enjoy the rest of the eats,” and swept quickly from the building.

Outline

Chapter 1) Tashigi’s last drink

Chapter 2) Attempted suicide

Tashigi attempts to shoot herself in the head

She wakes up the next morning and thinks she missed; she even finds the hole in her ceiling.

She goes to a seedy potion shop and buys poison.

She drinks the poison and is puking up her guts, but then her body metabolizes it and she’s fine.

Frenzied, she slits her wrists and runs, bleeding, off the edge of a cliff.

Chapter 3) Rescue

Zoro finds her while he’s lost trying to get to the ship. It’s raining so he has Kuina’s funeral on the brain, and he’s really freaked when he finds her in a pool of her own blood. He convinces himself that the only reason he’s so desperate is because of Kuina.

He (with Sangi giving him directions) takes her back to the ship where Chopper looks her over and sees that her wounds are healed. She has a fever though.

She wakes up and doesn’t remember anything besides “I want to die.”

Chapter 4) Waking Up

She bonds with the crew little by little; they all grow attached to amnesia girl.

She can’t get used to being called Tashigi, since it’s not familiar to her. Zoro somehow says “Kuina,” and she likes it a lot, so she decides to name herself that. She does ask his permission though.

A man claiming to be her father comes along and asks her to go home with him. (He is really the creepy doctor who created her.)

Chapter 5) Past

She says she doesn’t want to hurt him by refusing to come with him, but she doesn’t even know him, so she asks if he wants to do dinner or something.

They go out to dinner and Sangi follows them and makes a row in the kitchen.

The doctor eventually gets fed up with her continually suggesting that she stay with the pirates and loses his temper, first shouting at her, then proclaiming her status as his finest creation, his last symphony, his magnum opus…

Sangi senses a damsel in distress from several rooms away and runs to the rescue, followed by Luffy who came to eat and Nami who came to make sure the boys didn’t cause trouble and Chopper and Zoro who came to look after Tashigi and everyone else who just came.

The pirates run the evil doctor off, but Tashigi faints.

She remembers everything.

Chapter 6) Truth

They bring her back to the ship and nobody knows she has her memories back.

She says goodbye to Zoro.

She leaves a note for everyone else.

They search for her but the trail goes cold.

Chapter 7)

Eventually they find her by chance waiting tables in a restaurant, and Zoro chases her.

She tells him everything.

He says his bit about it’s her body now and her life to live and everything.

They come back to the others and Tashigi is welcomed back into the crew.

#Beth's New Year's Cleaning Queue #free to a good home #Any and all parts available for general use with credit #fanfic #fanfiction #one piece #one piece fanfiction #writing #writing ideas #suicide #suicidaly thoughts #tw suicude

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divagonzo · 5 years ago

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Unpopular Opinion: many things been said against Romione shippers/Fic demonizing Lavender to make Hermione look better But I haven't seen as much complaining about the demonizing of Dean Thomas in Hinny fics set in HBP and afterwards. I lost count how many times I have recently (and by popular Hinny authors!) read fics where Dean was demanding,pushing and trying to pressure poor Ginny into having sex/was bad at it and then being a petty and bitter towards Harry. it reeks of racism. 1/2

2/2 I mean I feel it's partly JKR fault because she went out of her way to make both Michael Corner & Dean Thomas ''horrible boyfriends' (which in Dean case is BS the only thing in canon showing friction is Dean 'pushing' Ginny through the portrait and that can be just as much about Ginny trying to be a 'strong independent woman who needs no man') but if Lavender can get sympathy in fic so should Dean, who we've seen more in the books and who came across as good decent guy.

PS, also getting tired of the biphobia i've seen in some corner of the Seamus & Pavender fandom about how Seamus-Dean-Lavender-Parvati were really gay/lesbian all along and their m/f relationship was fake. Because of apparently bisexuals didn't exist until now... [eyeroll]

I need my demarcation line.

‘ello Nonnie. Fancy a cuppa?

I guess I’ve not been reading much lately over on the other side of my Canon ship (aka Harry & Ginny) to have come across any Dean discourse much anything that could be construed as demonization. (Then again, I have been busy so...)

Damn this got long quickly. Under a cutline just out of necessity.

If I am hearing you correctly, the fic writers are choosing to paint Dean in a negative light to emphasize why Ginny would want to break it off with him before getting with Harry. I must have my head in a hole because the only one I’ve read involving Dean in the last few months was the lovely one from @floreatcastellumposts and that was how Dean and Harry interacted in DH at Shell Cottage. (I admit I do have some appreciation for the subtle angst and how troubled Harry is and how few people he trusts in his life. Been there, done that, binned the t-shirt.)

I’ll also agree completely how HBP altered the characters considerably to make the plot work, including Dean, who up ‘til they was either a wallflower or a background character turn into a problematic male character (and also one of the few Men of Color in the entire series which I find more troubling but I digress.) because of the forcing the plot to have Ginny make him redundant before getting with Harry.

Fic writers can take those small nuggets of information and expand the ideas for such (even if I find it personally squicky AF to have a 16-year-old and Under 16 having those physical relations. *shudder* (Heck, I have problems writing any Linny Under 18 fic that involves anything more than hand holding - but then that’s my Ace showing there.) but to take it to such an extreme and petty expansion of idea is, well, not my cup of tea at all. (There’s plenty I will nope right out of and walk away without commenting if there is a tag I see that will make me shudder or get squicked.) But him being petty and sullen and bitter that he did (in those fics) have s* with Ginny and was bad at it?

I wish the trope of “immediate sex god” would die a thousand papercut deaths because most guys at 16-19 can barely control themselves, much less think of the other person to make the experience a memorable one. (And let’s expand that to 15-95 but I digress.) There’s a reason it’s called wham/bam/thank you ma’am. That’s about how long it takes at that age for a guy. (oops! Showing my age there.)

I personally have zero issues with Dean and Seamus as a ship even if I will never write it (I won’t write MLM having dated 2 in the closet and one stayed in because of safety reasons) but those who do can do.

I do find that The Author did make a bit of a mess of the characterizations in book six (and I won’t even get into how there is a discord of continuity of ethnic heritage involving Lavender Brown) including how Dean was made to look like he was being possessive when for all we know, he was being kind and Ginny was in a foul mood.

But let’s hit on that PostScript which to me is the enormous hippogriff in the room.

Admittedly, Biphobia and Bise/xual erasure is prevalent and it’s upsetting, even to me, the cranky Crusty Ace Dragon. Telling someone that they aren’t what they claim (either saying their straight, really are gay but in denial, or gonna cheat and would you just pick one and stick with it? absolute rubbish.

(I’m intentionally not touching on Pansexual but I can later if need be.)

I’ve heard of plenty who get told they are likely to cheat because they are bisexual. I’ve heard plenty who get told would you make up your mind? and the ever-present, “You can’t be bi because you’re in a het relationship” like that has any bearing on who you are as a person. Hubs and I are visually in a het relationship but we’re not since we’re both Ace Spectrum (aka not-straight - him being Grey and me being Demi) but no one dares tell him such. No one dares mention that to me, either. (Especially after my repeated diatribes on gatekeeping I experienced in the 90s while wandering the alphabet wastelands.)

Frankly, it’s disgusting. And let’s talk about those who want even more bloody gatekeeping, referring to gay men and lesbian women as “Are you a Gold Star XXX?” which is the most epic bullshit I’ve read this year (and that’s taking some serious liberties but I digress.) What kind of bullshit is this, a damn purity test? Not everyone realized coming out of the womb they were gay. Some came to it later. Some stayed in the closet for safety reasons. Some stayed in because it was a no big deal otherwise.

But to tie it all in.... to invalidate the experiences of Lavender and Seamus (and Dean, too) as calling it fake is rude at best, insulting at worst. Now it could be said as performative (which plenty who aren’t straight do go through ‘til they know for certain - or at least did back in the dark ages) but then there are so many under the LGBTQIA umbrella who have had performative relationships to either fit in, hide, or trying to get another to cure them before accepting they were, in fact, not straight. But then that’s the thing about dating in your teens and early 20s - learning who you are but also what interests you and what traits you would want in a long-term partner (if that is a goal) and also what traits are a hell naw breaker for you.

But to expect some kind of irrational purity from the outset and slandering those who had to find their own way down winding roads to where they are happy and content with who they are (with gender and expression and orientation and preferences) and to have all of those experiences invalidated because you’re not pure enough for someone hateful and vicious and unworthy of someone who has probably gone through hell and back just to find their identity of who they are.

The hypocrisy of it stinks worse than I do after a full day of hiking in 25* temps.

So in short, Seamus and Lavender were never fake. Performative, maybe, but not fake. Dean and Ginny dating? Never fake. Erasing any possibility that Seamus, Dean and/or Lavender are Bisexual? That stinks highly.

Quit fetishizing MLM and WLW single-sex relationship.

#Great - the read-more line isn't working #what else will get fucked up today?

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officialinuyasha · 6 years ago

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Official Art is free use as long as it is not used for monetary gain, and I will never ask anyone for money for my pictures, and I was told I am the only person that actually credits the official animators and artists. Each image of the anime is directly ripped RAW Japanese versions, that are ages old by the way. There are probably better ones out there now. Because had these when the English dub hadn’t came out on my Windows XP. About that, they should be in 1080, but since they were used into WMM I had to recolor all of them and increase their quality myself. I don’t like taking screenshots from YouTube like most people do. Not only do I increase the quality but there are assets I enjoy changing them from the anime. Most people can’t even tell it’s changed because it’s “that good” they say. The only thing I ask if you are sharing my edits, just credit me for taking to time to increasing the resolution, ripping, and alters. I do a lot of screen-stitching also. There’s a lot of them and some I haven’t even posted. But here are some of my favorites -

Besides that, I also like posting basic screen caps with my watermark on it. Because I did it. I don’t have to explain myself on that. Because it originated from my RAW rips, I have every right to credit the official animators and myself for doing the work. I see a lot of people post their watermarks on official images, even when it comes to illegal manga scan sites. I don’t see anyone complaining about that.

If you see my watermark on it, like Max’s it’s because I have his permission to slightly alter it as a Profile Picture! - and I usually have their credit or their watermark on it also whether in the image or in the description! Since Max intentionally made art for me also, it’s kinda a given.

I always see @redrobelover talk about bullying and certain fandoms. I can tell you what I see.

Here is what I see most of -

People “bully” others if someone is asking where a certain fan art came from - With absolutely no intent to steal it. They know they didn’t make the art.

But as soon as someone constantly credits each individual animator, they don’t care and the official animators are swept under the rug. These people are paid, just like fan artists. But they are way less known. I hardly ever see anyone talking about the animators of InuYasha. When they do, it makes me very happy and excited.

They also think it’s okay for someone to share Fan Art from a person that intentionally left because of drama like this. Basically, “this person left, probably because their art was being stolen and sold on Chinese merchandise. But I’m going to share it anyway.” And to them, that’s completely fine.

Can you see where all this hypocrisy is?

I’ll tell you all a story. Our friend was from Tumblr since 2009. I won’t give out her identity, but a lot of these people know. And she recognizes a lot of this toxicity and drama. She used to write a lot of fan-fictions and became really well-known. She was a very popular role-player.

She knows and can name people, can predict how people are -exactly- on here.

Well she actually left because people wouldn’t stop fighting, making fake accounts to go and attack everyone. This stuff is stupid. I just don’t get what’s so fun in that.

A story about me.

I had a friend on here I knew for years. She used to take a lot of my edits and I wouldn’t say anything because she was my friend. Even if it bugged me, I felt like she wasn’t doing any harm in that. All I asked of her was to at least tell me or credit me. Which I don’t think she ever did. It was always odd to find out from another person that she was doing this, or stumbling upon it myself.

The sad part was, I saw her as a really close friend of mine. And when my life began ta change dramatically I went and told her everything. I wrote a whole novel for her. In hopes that she was going to be supportive of my life changes and choices I was making during my transition and the person I am meant ta be with. Like most of my friend are supportive of it and asked me a whole buncha questions about it. They were happy.

Unfortunately I never got the ecstatic answer from her. Instead she ghosted on me and I think blocked me. I never understood why. But I was told it was probably because we have the same mind set in a lot of things. So I will never hate on her ever. I don’t have a reason to. I just wished things like that was better.

We are all a family. We all like InuYasha. InuYasha is supposta be a safe space.

Something I wrote in August 20th, 2018

My name is InuYasha, yes legally. Yes I'm the only person on record with that name in the US atleast. I am a transman. I've been on hormones for two years now! 💪💉 Damn those "emojis" look hella weird... August 2016 was when I started my hormones. Anyway. I'm in a relationship with @officialkagome , her name is Kagome she's a transwoman! I really came around on YouTube 2007 as TheHanyouInuYasha, now displayed as "OfficialInuYasha". I also run the FaceBook group "Official InuYasha Group" which is increasingly popular and extremely active with almost 5,000 members now! My sister really helped push me to go for the doctor's appointment for my transgender diagnosis in order for me to start my hormones. The series InuYasha really helped me get in touch with my true self, as InuYasha I see myself as one with. Being an outcast and having to make my own world was very, very difficult. I went through a lot of depression and anger during certain times and was told I could not be "InuYasha" because they told me I was a "girl". Just like in the series how the ignorant people also pestered InuYasha being half demon, that it was "unnatural" to them. I continued on, struggling as InuYasha. I started cosplaying InuYasha around 2005. I remember going to my neighbors house to watch it pre-recorded in Japanese dub! I was only about 10 years old. My grandma helped me make my first outfit. We made the top from a Wizard robe and Dancer pants patterns. I have gone through four different outfits, now 7 wigs, and 6 different Tetsusaigas. My current wig was made by Alichii from deviantART since 2004 based on Katie Bairs method, made from 3 different wigs. A historical wig. My current outfit is the Officially licensed VIZ Media outfit! It's my treasure. Kagome in the series really helped me alot to learn and to love. I have had many issues with haters, stalkers and copycats. Keh! But that won't stop me!

- The response @officialkagome wrote after me -

My name is Kagome, yes; it really is. InuYasha inspired me to share my own story. I am a transwoman, and have known I was a female my entire conscious life. I was told I couldn't be Kagome because I wasn't a girl. I was punished a great deal and abused for being trans. I was told I was wrong, and sick for 'thinking' I was a girl, I was invisible to everyone around me. I grew into an aloof teenager that thought I knew the evils of the world, until when 14 years old; I was sexually assaulted by three men while at a house party without my parents knowledge. My world fell to pieces, and who I was died. I spiralled, I lost all respect for myself. I never was dated, I gave myself to bad guys. I made horrible choices and I still carry the shame of what those men turned me into. I watched InuYasha a lot then, and I found similarity in myself and Kagome. She was everything I always dreamed of being. Kind, brave, beautiful and pure. My first Impression of InuYasha was that he was a jerk; but I got to learn more about how he felt different in his world, and didn't belong. Before I knew it, I fell deeply in love with him. He saved my life and made me feel like that strong woman I knew I was. I spent the next 13+ years submitting to the fact that I would never really be able to see InuYasha, I begged for dreams, If I could only see him.. Meanwhile, InuYasha was going through the same exact thing. We crossed paths on so many occasions, even unknowingly, we grew up in the same cities, our whole lives lead up to us finding one another and life blessed me, and brought InuYasha to me in the most ironically fated way. We are BOTH trans! He gets me, And he waited for me just as long as I waited for him. There is so much coincidence in our meeting. It's haunting. He looks at me, a pile of my trauma; and he loves my broken pieces back together. InuYasha has ALWAYS come for me, and I may have lost faith; but I am glad I didn't. InuYasha found me in the darkness; and now together we move towards tomorrow. We have always been the same since the very beginning. We ARE InuKag~

Thank you for all the asks.

I will respond to each one. All will be animated, which I know they are piled up.

So send all Asks. Let’s see how fun we can make this -

- Inu-Yasha -

#inuyasha #kagome #犬夜叉 #officialinuyasha #officialkagome #rant #fanart #fandom #redrobelover #maxintoshi #personal #hurt #bullying #lgbt #trans #transgender #lgbtq #officialinuyashagroup

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robininthelabyrinth · 6 years ago

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Fic: Jonah (ao3 link)

Fandom: Flash, Legends of Tomorrow Pairing: Barry Allen/Mick Rory/Leonard Snart Series: Flashwave Week 2018 (Destiny Series)

Summary: In which Barry goes to sleep and wakes up to a very different universe.

And it's all because Leonard "Destiny of the Endless" Snart couldn't keep his big mouth shut while reading the literal Book of Destiny.

Oh, well.

A/N: @flashwaveweek - Flashwave Week: Accidental Marriage

——————————————————————————————

Barry, as he so often does, wakes up feeling tired.

Not physically, of course; his powers make sure that even minimal amounts of sleep are enough to fully revive him.

Wouldn't want the world to go without one its heroes, Barry thinks bitterly.

Most of his mornings are spent like this, now: awake, but trapped in bitterness and regret. He's not sure when exactly it started, this endless frozen atrophied bitterness - when Joe's new baby died, maybe, or when Wally was killed, or when Caitlin was mind-wiped until she didn't remember any of them, or when Cisco went temporarily evil and killed so many people that even the defense of mind control didn't swing the jury back in his favor.

He has new members of Team Flash to back him now, but it's not the same. He knows he can't let himself get close to them or they'll just be targets as well, more than they already are.

Everyone he's close to is a target.

Like Iris.

Oh, Iris...

Maybe that's when the bitterness started, when Iris sat him down - months ago, now - and held his hands and told him that while she still loved him, she thought it'd be better for both of them if they weren't married anymore.

Barry doesn't blame her. He wouldn't want to be friends with a Jonah like him, either: mysterious disappearances at every turn, weird twists and turns what feels like every week, never any normal life, and poisonous honey to draw in every maniacal villain in existence, it felt like.

Even the Justice League, in which he put so much hope, is fracturing: Batman's latest protégé brutally murdered and Batman lashing out against them all as a result, Superman's identity and Earth parents under threat, Diana offered an irresistible chance to go home again for a rest, Hal sent far away...no one has time or interest in their alliance beyond the moments of utter necessity, which seem to happen about once a year or so.

Nothing like the group of friends who can understand the pressures of heroism that Barry wanted it to be.

And that leads him back to where he is: bitter and tired and unable to get up.

"Bar!" Iris' voice rings through the door, causing Barry to violently start. Iris hasn't lived in what was once their mutual apartment since she'd moved back home to take care of Joe, who was near-catatonic with grief. Sure, she still had a key, but she never used it... "Barry Allen, I know you have super-speed, but if you don't get up now, you're going to be late. Or, more importantly, we're going to be late!"

Barry doesn't recall any plans he had with Iris. Honestly, Barry doesn't recall the last time he spoke with Iris, even though (even after everything) she's still his anchor.

Is this another trick? Another villain's scheme?

Only one way to find out.

He gets dressed and goes into the kitchen, where Iris is rifling through the fridge, though she looks up when he walks in.

"There you are, lazybones," she says, grinning at him, and Barry has to take a step back, because he hasn't seen Iris this healthy, this whole, this happy in - years. Even before she moved out. "Don't tell me you're getting cold feet."

"Cold feet?" Barry echoes helplessly.

"More like hot feet, I'd say," another voice says with a laugh from his blind spot, and now Barry's really twitching because it's been forever since he heard that voice, it can't be, he's dead, but no, Barry turns and there he is.

Eddie Thawne is sitting at Barry's kitchen table with a newspaper and a wedding ring.

"You're letting the puns get to you, babe," Iris says, going over and giving him a kiss on the cheek. "You planning to go villain on us?"

"Hey, I don't necessarily get my puns from the villains," Eddie protests mildly, smiling up at her with that devoted, loving gaze he's always had for Iris, the one that won him Barry's affection even despite their competition. "Maybe I get it from my wonderful pun-using award-winning journalist wife. Have you considered that possibility, Mrs. West?"

"I have indeed, Mr. West," Iris says haughtily, but with a grin. "And I'll have you know that your wife just reports what's out there - Barry, you're pale. Did you forget your midnight snack again? You know your metabolism goes screwy when you don't eat enough."

Barry shakes his head and shrugs. He can't think of what to say. He can't think of - anything.

They look so happy.

"Sit and eat," Eddie says, looking at him with a frown. "Did we - did we actually wake you up? We didn't mean to."

"Like Barry would've slept through our kids getting ready to go school," Iris says, but she sounds doubtful. "They're total elephants and we do live right upstairs..."

Barry and Iris didn't have kids. They'd wanted to, of course, in the beginning, but then there was what happened to Nora and they'd never quite managed to get over that enough to start trying, not before the tragedies started - or worsened, really, it wasn't like their lives weren't full of tragedy before...

"Nora?" he croaks.

"No, Don and Dawn," Iris says, looking puzzled. "They're the maniacal little kindergarteners; little Nora's still cooking." She taps her belly, which now that Barry pays attention he notices is curved out slightly. "As you well know. Are you okay?"

Barry opens his mouth to tell them that there's been a timeline alteration, that someone's changed something - Eddie's alive, after all, and he shouldn't be - but then he stops.

If he tells them there's a timeline alteration, then they'll want to help him try to fix it.

They'll want to send him back.

Back to a world where he lives in his big apartment alone with the wreck of all his dreams, where Iris has quit her job to care for Joe, where...his friends...his friends...

"I think I have temporary amnesia," Barry says apologetically. "Can you catch me back up?"

"Uh, sure," Iris says, blinking at him. "Is this a Justice League thing?"

Barry shrugs apologetically.

"I'm going to text Diana very angrily about this," Iris says, who's never had Diana's phone number. No one had Diana's phone number, and once she went back to Thermiscyra it was a moot point anyway. "Or maybe Selina."

"Selina?"

"Batman's wife? Catwoman?"

"Oh," Barry says faintly. "Right. Her."

Batman got married?!

"Barry, please sit and eat something," Eddie says, coming over and putting a warm hand on his back. "Whatever's gone wrong, we'll help you fix it, you know that."

"I know," Barry says, his throat tight. "Uh. Can I ask you - about everyone else?"

"Sure," Iris says. "But then - as soon as we finish our appointments today - we're taking you to STAR Labs for Caitlin to check you."

"Caitlin's - at STAR Labs?"

"Well, no," Eddie says. "Only sometimes. She got that job in that hospital - Head of the Metahuman Wing, remember? Her and Killer Frost both?"

"Of course he doesn't remember, Eddie," Iris says. "He has amnesia."

"Well, I don't know how far back the amnesia goes -"

"Cisco?" Barry interrupts, a little desperately. "Joe?"

"Cisco's at STAR Labs," Iris agrees, clearly puzzled. "Probably setting up for his first class of the day -"

"Class?"

"Yeah, the Flash Engineering Corps," Eddie says, looking amused. "Best scholarship program in the Twin Cities - plus you get to work for a superhero while saving up for college. Iris' idea, of course."

"Shush, you. Joe's - well, Joe's probably dropping Jenna off at school after her dentist appointment, then dropping Cecile off at the DA's office, and then going into work at the CCPD as usual, I guess?"

Barry swallows hard. Caitlin herself, Cisco free, Joe aware...

There's got to be a catch.

"Oh, crap," Iris says abruptly. "Our appointment! Barry, we can deal with your amnesia later, but if we miss this, they won't let us have another, and then you won't have a suit for your wedding!"

...wait, what?

"Uh," Barry says.

"Listen, here, Barry Allen," Iris says. "I know you and Mick would probably get married in your underwear and a bathrobe if we let you, but damnit that is not going you happen, you get me?"

"Yes, ma'am," Barry says automatically, saluting her so that she laughs and punches his arm lightly.

His mind is still reeling. Mick? As in, Mick Rory? Formerly the supervillain Heatwave, most recently member of the Legends, kind of depressed almost all the time?

They're getting married?!

This can’t be right.

Barry checks his phone for confirmation. There’s a WhatsApp group chat titled “Justice League” that’s filled with jokes, that’s the first thing he notices – did Batman really just send around a bat emoji? really? will wonders never cease? – but Barry’s Facebook definitely seems to suggest that he’s marrying Mick Rory and that everyone is sending him congratulations on it.

“Barry,” Iris says. “Appointment. Time to get moving.”

There's a knock at the door.

"I've got it," Eddie says, and is at the door opening it before Barry can say anything - you don't open doors, you don't know who's waiting behind those doors with a gun and a grudge, that's how we lost Cecile, except here they didn't lose Cecile. "Oh, Snart, what are you doing here?"

Snart?

Wait, no, this is good - in Barry's universe, Snart had recently returned from the dead to assume some sort of mystical magical position or something, something Constantine called "Destiny of the Endless". Barry's not entirely sure what he does - it seems to involve a lot of reading - but it did mean that he spends most of his days in his garden house outside of time.

And if he's outside of time, he wouldn't be affected by the timeline changes!

"- just need to borrow Barry for a bit," Snart is saying apologetically. His hood is up over his head and his eyes are glowing that inhuman blue that Barry's still not used to, and he has his ridiculous Book in hand; he's definitely still Destiny here. "I'll get him to the fitting, don't worry; just meet us there."

"Fine, I'm trusting you," Iris says, shaking her head at him. "C'mon, Eddie; you can drop me off before you go to work - Barry will catch up later, apparently. But don't you dare be late, Bar!"

"Uh," Barry says.

"Later than usual," she amends.

"Okay," he says, because that seems slightly more plausible.

They leave and Barry turns onto Snart. "Do you know -" he starts, only for Snart to interrupt.

"I'm sorry," he says.

Barry stares at him. "Oh god," he says. "It's affected you, too."

Snart scowls at him. "It has not," he snaps. "But I promised Mick those'd be the first words out of my mouth."

That seemed pretty plausible. Mick could get Snart to do just about anything.

"And I am," Snart adds grudgingly. "Sorry. I guess."

That sounds more like it.

"You're behind the timeline change?"

Snart winces. "Bit more than a timeline change," he says. "I'm - listen, I'm new at this whole Destiny thing, okay?"

"...yeah..?"

"I was - multitasking."

Barry's never heard that word imbued with such gravitas portending doom.

(Does the ability to do that come with the Destiny job?)

"Okay, and?" he asks.

"Turns out that's a bad idea," Len says grimly.

"What did you do, Snart?"

"I was reading from the Book," Snart says. "You know, the one that describes how reality operates?"

He shakes it pointedly.

Barry just gives him a look.

"Anyway, Mick was on my case about - something - and he mentioned you a few times - as a good influence or something - and, uh, I may have lost my temper a bit -"

"Snart. What did you do."

"I said, 'if you like Barry Allen so much, maybe you should marry him'," Snart says, looking hideously embarrassed.

As he should.

"What are you, five?" Barry asks. "I haven't heard that used as a comeback since first grade."

Possibly third. Maybe even fifth.

Barry was never really good at comebacks.

That's not the point.

"The point is," Snart says, "is that by saying that while reading the Book, reality got a little...confused."

"Confused," Barry says flatly.

"It - may have reshuffled itself into a world in which you and Mick are getting married."

“No kidding,” Barry says. He’s already figured that out. “And I don’t remember the new backstory because…?”

“Speed Force,” Snart says with a shrug. “Protects you from timeline shifts for the most part, or at least your memories. You should start getting the memories from this timeline in a few months, though.”

“Just like it was with Flashpoint?” It’d taken all summer before Barry’s old memories started fading in favor of the new ones.

“Yeah, like that,” Snart says.

Barry considers this. “…can it be changed back?” he asks after a long moment.

“It can,” Snart says. “But Mick doesn’t really want to – there’s some friends of his on the Legends that died. Sometimes in pretty nasty ways. Anyway, they’re back now. But he says I have to check with you as to what you want.”

“My memories of this world will start coming in in a few months?”

“Yeah. You’ll still remember the old world, though; it’ll just be overlaid with, like, important event memories so that you're not always asking about backstory.”

“Okay, then,” Barry says.

“…what does that mean?” Snart asks suspiciously.

“It means ‘okay’,” Barry says. “Thus far, this world seems a lot better than the one I left behind so, you know, screw that.”

He wasn't able to stay in Flashpoint because what he had to give up was so great, but the world he's left behind now? The world of misery and death and the endless despair of being a Jonah?

Seriously.

Screw that.

“You have a whole brand new set of enemies,” Snart warns him.

“Not exactly a new experience,” Barry says with a shrug. “Cisco and Caitlin can catch me up until I get the memories.”

“My sister’s developed plant-related powers and lives in Gotham now.”

“…weird and not exactly on-theme for her, but that sounds like Batman’s problem, not mine.”

“You kind of have to marry Mick.”

“Have to?”

“The entire reality rewrite is based on it,” Snart says. “The whole thing won’t fix into place until you both say ‘I do.’”

“But we could theoretically get divorced afterwards?”

“Yeah, no problem. It’d take you a year, legally speaking, but you can do it.”

A year married to Mick Rory, in exchange for Iris happily married with kids (and living upstairs, no less), Joe still functional, Cisco free and teaching, Caitlin at a hospital, a proper Justice League friendship group, and even some of the Legends brought back?

Yeah, like that’s a tough choice.

“I’m in,” Barry says. “Can I talk with Mick about this? He remembers everything, right?”

“Yes, he does, and he’s coming back tomorrow,” Snart says. “Legends, you know, they’re not always great on timing.”

“I do know that,” Barry says. “Uh – how does Mick feel about it? The marriage thing? Does he just want to pretend our way through it, or…?”

It’s not like Barry would really object if Mick wanted to give the marriage thing an actual go. He’s touch-starved, he’s apparently single, and he’s always been aware that Mick is ridiculously hot.

No pun intended.

(Damnit, villains!)

Snart smirks.

“Like I said,” he drawls. “He likes you. In fact, he likes you so much that he oughta marry you – and look at that, so you are.”

Barry shakes his head. “Whatever,” he says. He’ll talk about it with Mick directly; that’ll make more sense. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’ve got a suit fitting to go to.”

Maybe, if he’s lucky, he’s arrived early enough to still help out with the cake-tasting selection…

(Mick ends up making all the cake samples. Barry would marry him just for that.)

#flashwave #flashwaveweek2018 #barry allen #leonard snart #mick rory #iris west #eddie thawne #my fic

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patchdotexe · 6 years ago

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i went on a long ramble on twitter and realized i was going to stop so im gonna talk about some personal stuff relating to “leo shitposts about system shenanigans at 2 am”. the bulk of this is gonna be under a cut but

im fictionkin, ive been a multiple system for like 7 years now, and both of those things are a major part of my life and my identity. our identity. identities? overall identity. i used to be really really open about it on my old tumblr, but then i went through a horrendous amount of abuse, lost contact with all my friends, had the foundation of myself as a person completely torn down, and when i came back i was still kinda open about it but gradually tapered off because i was scared of potential backlash for being cringey/too weird/etc. especially now that im apparently a popular artist in the jsab fandom.

jsab is not only my current major special interest, but had enough of an effect on me for myself & my alters to form strong attachments to the characters and, well, pick up kintypes. we even have a fictive of [drumrolls] cube. that’s just something that’s a Thing with us. and, yeah, it does... it does affect our askblog, because it started out as Hex (who’s kin of square) goofing off and wanting to do fun jsab stuff. the palanauts stream was entirely “irl swears plays jsab and makes funny jokes”.

“so why dont you talk about it anymore?” my abuser gaslit me to hell and back and i forgot who i even was. tumblr has always been full of “kin drama”-- i was here during 2013, trust me, ive seen it-- but after returning from 7 months of emotional hell i saw that the climate had entirely changed in a really weird way. like, yeah, kin was more widespread and known about, but it was still like... a joke. or annoying.

we also feel very self-conscious about the things we kin, and there’s a bunch of reasons: we feel like we’re being cringey, we feel like we shouldn’t have this level of connection (hex especially has a lot of embarrassment about “why am i kin of a tiny cyan square that says fuck”), there’s been a couple of instances where there has been, like, fandom drama because of us or a friend being too open about kintypes in situations where the creator was hands-on with the fandom and saw it as people “stealing characters”.

and its like... i know other jsab kins! im not the only one! counting my own system i think i know one of, like, everybody. but the problem is: i am now running an askblog with 140+ followers. people react to me as if i am a big popular person that is intimidating bc i... am apparently a big name in the fandom now or something? (ill admit this really really confuses me and probably will until the end of time). so like... how are people going to react to “oh, yeah, the person that runs justasksandbeats is a kinnie system and the dialogue from swears/friend/cube is his alters writing how they would respond in a given situation”.

although that does mean that, yes, the art cube draws on ja&b IS drawn by Actual IRL Cube. the rest of the art is a collab effort between the whole system but if we get an ask asking cube to draw, then cube fronts and draws. hex thinks its really cute.

im rambling a lot, sorry... i guess its just, i want to be open about stuff, because i am Very open on my twitter. im just also scared that people are going to react negatively, especially now that i have followers that met me through the askblog or the tag. i also have trouble being talkative on tumblr in general because my post modes are either “several consecutive short posts like i do on twitter” or “long walls of text no one wants to read” like this. but ive like... just. gradually stopped being The Real Me on here and its making us feel weird. im still gonna keep up the persona on the askblog as Being A Normal Person Who’s Just A Huge Dweeb but at least on here i want to like... i dont know.

uhhh thanks for reading if you got this far i guess

#txt #leo chirps #long post /#system shit

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rcris123 · 7 years ago

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NAGAITA: A SHIP ANALYSIS

It’s been 3 years since I wrote my first ‘rant analysis’, which has recently started circulating around the site again. I thought of remaking it with an updated view, more comprehensive and less ‘ranty’. There will be links to manga/anime screencaps, because uploading a 3000 word analysis with pictures will crash tumblr.

As such I have decided to split this up in 4 parts:

1. Direct canon, interaction or mentions of one another, or slimpler said: THE CANON part.

2. Indirect canon, or what might be inferred from the canon of both characters, based on their personalities, actions, past or morals. The things that could have happened, but didn’t on screen. This will be the CANON DYNAMICS part.

3. Speculative canon, meaning scenes, lines or interactions from canon that could be interpreted as in favor of the ship based on the dynamics of both characters.Thus the INTERPRETATIVE CANON part.

4. And last, some of my personal headcanons and dynamics regarding their canon interaction or that can be derived from canon interactions. The HEADCANON part.

1- THE CANON.

It’s true, there is little canon interaction to support the ship. But the little that we were offered can be just as valuable, especially since both Itachi and Nagato are well developed characters, with well established personalities, moral codes and pasts. However now I’ll only be looking at direct canon interactions or mentions.

When thinking Nagato and Itachi one will obviously associate it with the Edo Tensei arc, where the two were teamed off. And while brief it is telling of their relationship.

The two are obviously friends: helping each other and talking amicably about their past and current situation. It may seem that the two have met each other in person before. Notable is also the fact that, at least Nagato, seems to be recognizing Itachi’s jutsus before he uses them.

Two more important scenes are as follows:

“I’M SORRY, ITACHI.”

After being forced to fight Naruto, Bee and Itachi, the fight ending with Nagato caught by the spirit sword of Totsuka, Nagato’s first words towards the three are: “I’m sorry, Itachi.” It is an apology for forcing Itachi to fight him and ultimately ‘kill’ him. And although it may seem that Nagato and Naruto are closer for their bond as pupils of Jiraya, Nagato does not apologize to Naruto for having to face him again. Itachi is the only one that he apologizes to, before his demise, somewhat reminiscing of Itachi’s parting with Sasuke. After being nudged by Itachi to say goodbye to the rest, Nagato does so with his speech to Naruto. Then he is sealed and portraits of the three being shows in the meantime: Naruto and Bee are looking forward, Itachi is looking backwards as Nagato says one last ‘goodbye’, presumably to the one looking at him: Itachi.

From this scene we can say that the two are indeed close.

“I’M LEAVING WITH NAGATO.”

While not technically canon, since it was featured in a filler episode of Shippuuden(Episode 420), it is still very much tied to canon as part of Tsukoyomi dream sequence arc, where everyone imagines a perfect ending. And that is very telling; in his Tsukoyomi, Bee, who met both Itachi, Nagato and Kisame, chose to give Itachi his happy ending alongside Nagato, as the two basically elope in the scene, setting the canon groundwork for what might have actually been more than a friendship.

2-CANON DYNAMICS

This looks at their personality, backstory and beliefs and how well they mesh together. And first and foremost will come their similarities.

Nagato and Itachi are two characters that are quite similar: both experienced war at a young age (Nagato lost his parents when he was younger than 10, and according to Shinden, Itachi witnessed war before Sasuke’s birth, so before he was 5!) and as such want peace and to protect those closest to them from war (Nagato towards Yahiko and Konan, Itachi towards Sasuke). They both have powerful eyes (sharingan and rinnegan) that would allow them great power, which they harnessed at a young age, in order to protect those they love, trying to bear the world on their shoulders (Itachi taking on himself to kill the entire clan and become the ‘ultimate evil’ and Nagato taking the mantra of ‘the chosen one/the child of prophecy’ trying to save the world). They both had a ‘friend mentor’ figure that the two were very close to, maybe even getting to romantic feelings (Shisui and Yahiko) and they both died tragically having a significant impact on them. Ultimately they are two very lonely people, broken inside due to their past, ill (Nagato is anorexic and unable/struggling to walk and Itachi is suffering from a heart/lung disease) and aware that they can’t bring peace to the world, living their lives under a false identity (Nagato as the God Pein and Itachi as the Psychopathic Criminal.)

They share a lot, from similar pasts to similar philosophies so the two could get very much along together, supporting each other through their illness as they’re the only ones in Akatsuki with so prominent health issues. The only obstacle a proper friendship/romance would face in this situation is the two having created alter-egos that do not let their vulnerabilities and true intentions shine through.

Lastly I want to outline an opinion that might be a bit controversial in the fandom: that Itachi’s is not as good at hiding his emotions as we’ve been led to be. It is supported in several instances in canon by the people Itachi is relatively close to. First it is Shisui that points out that his expression betrayed him and that he is ‘good at fooling himself’, it is true that Itachi couldn’t have been older than 10 then, but in the next instance he is in Akatsuki, when he should be technically already wearing the ‘mask of the criminal’. If Itachi Shinden is to be considered canon, then Juzo’s death is a prime example that teenage Itachi was still easy to read: Juzo notes before dying that Itachi has regrets and someone he wants to talk to before dying. The last instance is when Kisame points out that Itachi seems to be crying and tries to comfort his partner about his brother’s death; by this point Itachi managed to master hiding his emotions as noted by Kisame as him being ruthless, however Kisame still picks up on how Itachi might be feeling.

As such, if these people could pick up on at least some of Itachi’s emotions it wouldn’t be a stretch to say others would too, maybe even someone like Nagato.

3-INTERPRETATIVE CANON

Most of the scenes that I will be analyzing here have at their base the assumption that Nagato and Itach know each other and that they have a deep bond on friendship at least.

In cronological order here are the following:

OROCHIMARU’S EXPULSION FROM AKATSUKI

If we follow the narative pushed by Itachi Shinden, Orochimaru and Itachi had been in the organisation since ‘the very beginning’ and at some point Orochimaru is thrown out of the organization. And it is because of several reasons: he’s spying on the Akatsuki and leaking information and because he attacked Itachi. However it sounds nonsensical to throw a member out because he’s being antagonistic to another member (Kakuzu killed several of his partners and would keep doing so if Hidan wasn’t immortal), however I think Tobi/Madara/Obito (I’ll call him Madara because that’s who the characters think he is) needs Itachi alive and well either as a person he can manipulate or as a bridge to Sasuke for further manipulation, or because the leader has a preference in his members. Both can be considered to be quite a stretch however why would Orochimaru be thrown out of the organization almost immediately after the incident. More on the interpretative side (however this is what this section is for) I believe Madara didn’t yet have plans to manipulate Sasuke as he still relied on Nagato to do his dirty-work, instead it is Nagato trying to protect Itachi, a boy who he read (see part 2) as being distraught and traumatized still by the events of the clan massacre decided to give him a little help and protection. Nagato cares for the members of his organization (trying to find a suitable partner for Kakuzu, pairing Itachi a second time with a defected Swordsmen of the Mist nin, just like Juzo who Itachi was getting along with and mourning Deidara’s death).

AFTER ‘SASUKE’S DEATH’

Returning to the rainy scene mentioned before where Itachi ‘seems’ to be crying in the rain, it is noteworthy to mention that Madara, Pein/Nagato and Konan knew Sasuke wasn’t dead, just before the aforementioned scene took place. It is still raining, an unusual thing, and Itachi goes out to meet the rain, looking up at the sky.

Itachi doesn’t mourn the loss of his brother for too long and shortly after this incident Sasuke and Itachi have their showdown, Itachi knowing full-well that Sasuke was coming his way. In other words someone told him that his brother wasn’t in fact shortly after – maybe even in this scene, as we know Nagato can infuse rain with his own chakra and sometimes help loosen it up, or on the contrary make it last longer. Here it could be read as Nagato making the rain last longer, as comfort (allowing Itachi to ‘cry’ in the rain) and maybe as a message to Itachi that his brother isn’t dead yet.

NAGATO’S TURN TO THE ‘LIGHT’

Nagato’s turn after Naruto’s infamous ‘talk-no-jutsu’ is legendary in how poorly it has been written as Nagato seems to switch sides at the press of a button. My interpretation of this scene and the entire ‘invasion arc’ hinges a lot on my shipper feelings.

The invasion arc happens after Itachi’s death – and if you think their relationship happened, now Nagato’s lover is gone and buried leaving him with no moral support. An all out revenge attack on Konoha, the village Nagato thinks it’s to blame for everything (his parents and Yahiko’s death, and to a degree maybe even Itachi’s) isn’t that implausible. However after meeting Naruto and being explained that they’re both students of the same master, sharing the same goal, Nagato realized there’s someone to carry on the fight he has been through his entire life. So now he can let go, die, meet Itachi again, and, by reviving the village, repenting his sins, forgiving the village that took everything from him while at the same time giving him Jirayia, his mentor, and Itachi, his lover.

“SO THIS IS HOW IT TURNS OUT…”

Just a little tid-bit of dialog after Itachi manages to release himself from Kabuto’s control, in my interpretation, noting with sadness (ellipses and expression) that now he will be forced to fight Nagato, maybe even ‘kill’ him, a thing that he’s reluctant to do and didn’t wish to happen this way. Nagato’s line “I’m sorry, Itachi” encompasses that indeed Itachi didn’t want to fight, yet was forced to, and Nagato apologizes for putting him in this situation.

“I’M SORRY, ITACHI” (REPRISE)

A very important canon scene for these character’s development and if interpreted further it can be a mirror to this Itachi Shinden line, where Itachi asks Juzo if he has any last words, in this case similar to how he asks if Nagato has any last words. In the first scene Juzo reads through Itachi’s line as him having regrets and wanting to say goodbye to someone, in that case Sasuke. However in the latter, Itachi has already said his goodbye to Sasuke and he has no idea he will be meeting him later at Kabuto’s lair, however Itachi hasn’t said his goodbye to Nagato or he’s waiting for Nagato to part with him in a more meaningful manner than with a simple “I’m sorry”. But Nagato doesn’t, “I’m sorry, Itachi” being his last words towards him (if the “Goodbye” afterwords is not counted). However a simple “I’m sorry” is reminiscing of Itachi’s parting to Sasuke and it is the most meaningful parting the two could have had.

THE CRACKING OF ITACHI’S EDO TENSEI FORM

After sealing away Nagato, Itachi’s edo tensei form becomes cracked, maybe as a way to tell that having to fight and ‘kill’ his friend/lover Itachi feels broken, or not whole. On the other hand a cracked edo tensei could mean coming to terms with one’s self, becoming at peace and detaching spiritually from this world (how Sasori did after being captured). In a sense Nagato becoming sealed inside Itachi can lead to the thought that the two have become one and that eternity is theirs to spend together.

NAGATO AND SHISUI SHARED IDEOLOGIES

This entry is a bit more speculative than the others however I believe one of the reasons Itachi would be comfortable around Nagato is that he and Shisui shared ideologies and morals. In this panel Itachi refers to Naruto as possessing Shisui’s feelings (probably referring to a world of peace where people talk things out before jumping to violence). Before Yahiko’s death, Nagato too believed talking things out was the way to solve conflict, only to have those expectations shattered when Yahiko was murdered unjustly. As a result Nagato realized there can’t be any discussion if violence isn’t carried out first, because only then can the ‘the small ones’ speak and be heard. However maybe a part of his old beliefs still remained in his time in Akatsuki even if not directly stated.

However even more telling in linking Nagato and Shisui is that Nagato and Naruto are fellow students that share a good portion of moral code, and in this scene Naruto has been shown as sharing Shisui’s feelings too. So maybe Nagato, like Naruto, shares those feelings as well.

(BONUS) THE HEART

Nothing more to add here then, maybe, just maybe there’s a heart on the ground in this panel.

4-HEADCANONS

This part focuses more on ‘what-if’ scenarios, symbolism and relationship headcanons.

WHAT-IF’S

- What if the older Nagato gets the more he can read through Madara’s manipulation of him, since Madara came to him tempting him just after Yahiko’s death, when Nagato was still an emotional mess. What if seeing Itachi being brought in by Madara clicks in his head as this Masked Man manipulating another young grieved shinobi and he tries to protect Itachi from Madara, protecting him from going down the same terrible path as him.

- What if Nagato shows his true self to Itachi as a means of showing that he is no threat and that he’s trustworthy and because of that Itachi realizes that Nagato is just as broken and suffering as himself. And Itachi realizes he can’t let him struggle alone as he helped him through Akatsuki as well

- What if Nagato thinks of himself not as a God of Bountifulness and Good but a God of Death and Pain and he fears that anyone he loves will inevitably end up dying in his arms, which happens with Itachi too.

- What if it is Itachi that falls in love with Nagato first, the more he realizes that he is a man that shares Shisui’s intentions, at the same time offering Itachi a shoulder to lean on in need. Nagato reciprocates the feelings as Itachi becomes a constant presence in his life

- What if the two start discussing the world around them, about the meaning of life, of the shinobi, of the village, of peace and how the latter can be achieved at all, or if the very human nature prevents such peace. What if they realize peace can only be achieved at a personal level and they wish to achieve their peace together.

SYMBOLISM

- The dog and the crow: Itachi is undoubtedly linked with crows, they act a meaningful symbol, the birds that are harbingers of death and at the same time scavengers, picking up what’s left behind, intelligent and cautious. Nagato’s symbol animal is the dog, Chibi, the loyal one, protecting those it loves even if it claims it’s life, facing its struggles and fighting till the bitter end. And he can be considered Madara’s lap-dog for seemingly obeying his orders, or a stray dog that sruvived despite the hardship faces, always loyal to his cause. Both Itachi and Nagato were saved when young by their symbol animal (Shinden crow and Chibi)

- You are my eyes as I am your legs: they are both vulnerable in their own way and alone that can be debilitating, however together they are stronger, supporting each other through their vulnerabilities and hard times.In the Edo Tensei arc Itachi helps Nagato walk, and Nagato helps Itachi ‘see’.

- The Devil and Death: Nagato thinks of himself as the God of Death, one of misery and pain, his appearance somewhat resembling that of the Reaper with an exaggeratedly thin body and the ability to take life away with a touch, while Itachi is the Devil for mercilessly murdering his clan and taking up the mask of a psychotic ruthless criminal, the Devil incarnate.

- Atlas and the Sacrificial Lamb: Both Itachi and Nagato tries to bear the world on their shoulders, one tasked protecting his village and brother from the shadows, unseen and unheard to the point of killing his whole clan for it, and Nagato made out to be the one to save the world and bring peace, bearing the sins of the world on his shoulders. Both are Atlas, bearing their burdens alone and ultimately failing to do so, and both are Sacrificial Lambs, trying to save the world by offering up themselves, at the end both dying

- Flowers for blood: Both Itachi and Nagato are ill and suffering and the symbol for suffering is blood. However their suffering is poetic and meaningful and in each other’s presence the blood turns to flowers, just like the flowers their graves will bear because they were ‘unspoken heroes’.

RELATIONSHIP

- The two love spending silent moments together, where they don’t have to share words, yet at the same time enjoy the company of someone they feel comfortable with.

- “I’m sorry, Itachi” is a phrase that is much more common in Nagato’s thinking and speech and it is meant to symbolize that he wouldn’t want to hurt Itachi in any sort of way, even if it is inevitable that he does so, because they will inevitably die and the other will suffer greatly.

- Illness is something ever present in their lives, with the ever-looming presence of inevitable death, the two have acknowledged that their existence will come to an end soon, that every bond they had was doomed from the very beginning. They cherish every moment, taking care of each other, hoping it all lasts longer.

- They bring little useful gifts for each other, things that may cheer each other up, a package of dangos and medicine sneaked in Itachi’s room, a warm sweater or coat for Nagato who seems to always be walking naked, or some interesting new brew of tea or poetry book.

- Nagato knows how much Sasuke means to Itachi and he sometimes wonders how would it be possible to reunite them without having the two murder each other, in the end prolonging both their lives and sparing most of their suffering.

#naruto shippuden #nagaita #nagato uzumaki #itachi uchiha #akatsuki #theory #analysis #ship analysis #ship #shipping

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