#I headcanon Reason to be aro/ace

[spidey-bie]

Controversial Opinion

I can't see Hobie having sex. Ever.

This isn't directed at anybody but I just noticed something lately that I found interesting.

There are people who headcanon Hobie as Aroace or on the spectrum somewhere but nobody ever explicitly says that he doesn't have sex at all. People always find some roundabout way to say that he still has sex. Something like he still does it but he doesn't hold it in such high regard because of societal expectations on what sex is. Or even he just does it for fun.

Why?

Why can't he just not do it at all?

I thought we were trying to fight the stereotypes and the hypersexualization of black men not further reinforce societal norms on sex?

If this post has upset or triggered you in some way that's probably something you have to address inside yourself and not with me.

[hoipeepsimruby]

Genshin things that I will ignore in canon:

Diluc and Kaeya exchanging letters to each other during his 3-4 year revenge quest

Kid Kaeya was a perfect angel who never did anything wrong

Adult Kaeya is a perfect angel who never did anything wrong

(Let the man be morally dubious that’s when he’s most interesting. Plus his recent characterization is inconsistent with his earlier one and his bio lore)

Yae Miko tormenting every single Inazuma guy character (her silly rivalry with Itto can stay it’s funny)

60% of the Venti alcohol jokes (they aren’t funny most of the time. The only time it’s funny is times like when Beidou wouldn’t let Venti and Kazuha drink despite them both being of legal drinking age)

Paimon being the travelers voice (I’m in the minority where I like Paimon as I feel she’s the travelers annoying little sister and with that in mind she’s written rather well but I do agree with everyone who’s annoyed with how she speaks for the traveler. While I’ve never published any fanfics in a lot of my ideas Paimon ends up getting a bit shafted due to me not really knowing what to do with her because outside of being the travelers voice she doesn’t do all that much.)

Most of the Inazuma main story (if I want to I can be willfully ignorant and enjoy the story but after reading gold-rhine’s Inazuma re-write I can never go back)

The traveler being a jerk to Furina at the beginning of her story quest. (In character for Paimon but the traveler I think would at least be a little more understanding and would try to get Paimon to stop guilt tripping her)

Finally, the traveler fails to get Charlotte any scoops from the fortress of meropide. (I know why but they did waste a bunch of her money and that feels mean)

[rosetyler42]

Hi! I want to ask what you like about Martha Dracula.

Personally, I hate how she had no purpose other than die to make Drac sad. We didnt see any of her personality so her death feels far less impactful than say, Bambis mom, and I hate the concept of zing/love at first sight trope" because the idea you will immediately know who you are supposed to be with forever based on immediate attraction sends a harmful message to kids and erases aromatic and polyamorous people and ppl who break off romantic relationships but are happier off that way.

I do wish we got to know more about Martha beyond the tragedy of her death and her book about Mavis finding her own zing, but I can kinda understand it as...the story's more about Drac, Johnny and Mavis and there were alot of other things to focus on. We do have SOME window into her personality and relationship with Drac: Mavis is implied to be similar to her and be the peice of Martha he has left, part of the reason he's so protective of her (With all the talk of Ericka being Martha's reincarnation - basically this universe's Mina to compare to other Dracula adaptations, I kind of think MAVIS is actually closer to that role. At least symbolically, although there are other similarities after having read Dracula Daily.) We hear that Martha is clearly the more bold of the two (similarly to Johnny and Mavis.) There's the legend of her and Drac's love story and family in the "Lady Lubov" legend, Drac's been clearly sitting Shiva for over a century, Her book about zings and how they met when she was Mavis' age, And it's implied Drac and Martha loved making music together as Drac mentions he hasn't sung in public since Martha passed. But as much as I do love the things we got, I wish we'd gotten to see more of Martha, seen her and Drac together and their (Less amorous) Gomez and Morticia type dynamic. Now, there IS a deleted scene on the HT bluray that shows Drac and Martha meeting, their courtship, and them having Mavis which gives more of a glimpse at Drac and Martha together which you may be interested in seeing if you haven't already. Matter of fact, Martha's reveal of her pregnant belly as a bat CLEARLY got reused in HT2 in Mavis' reveal of her own pregnancy.

As for the whole zing business...Yes, like all "Love at first sight" and Soulmate stuff, it does spread some harmful ideas, particularly for aro and ace people (like myself!) My mother had similar issues with it herself when we first watched it (though I don't think she knew about aro identities) Though I can kind of understand why it exists. Social interaction, particularly dating, can be a confusing, difficult, and potentially painful process. And I guess it's nice to imagine that you COULD just know the person you're meant to be with without having to go through all the mess. In the case of the HT films, it's also supposed to be a gothic fairytale Romeo and Juliet kind of story, which Love at first sight and soulmates are common tropes in that. Not to mention the trying to juggle a love story plot, a buddy film, family antics, gags, worldbuilding, (and in HT3, the whole "Monster Genocide" business) doesn't exactly lend itself to slow burns. The zing is a sweet idea, even if it doesn't necessarily work that way in real life.

This got long as I have some feelings about anatonormativity + HT , so here's a read more:

To a certain extent, that's part of what I like about HT3: It challenges the "A Zing only happens once in your life" idea by having Drac find love again. And having him DEAL WITH the "You only zing once" being wrong. Alot of people hated that. Some seek to think him falling for Ericka lessens what he had with Martha or means that he's forgotten about her. That he's cheating on Martha somehow. Some dunked on Ericka saying she was "weird" and "ugly", saying Martha was prettier. Some tried to find explanations like Ericka being Martha's reincarnation. But to me...I mean, we tend to think of love as being "The One," yet people fall in love again and remarry all the time. There doesn't HAVE to be a reason Drac zinged twice. And it resolves an issue the first movie had ABOUT "If a zing only happens once, what about people who fall in love and remarry?" Making it at least a BIT less amatonormative in my opinion. Of course, I'm something of an expert at bending rules and finding less amatonormative interpretations, and they never explicitly state EVERYONE has a zing.

Honestly in some ways the HT films are both amatonormative and anti-amatonormative. You have the whole zing/soulmate business, Drac teasing Dennis about Winnie, the guys setting Drac up on dates despite him saying he's not interested, and the whole "late bloomer" conversion therapy business. Most characters in the show have a partner except the mummy (who's shown dating), Vlad (who's showing off for the witches and talks about Nefrititi) and Blobby (who's more comic relief.)

On the OTHER hand, You not only have a 3 generational Non-nuclear family (with a stepmom, yet!) Living together in the same building in close proximity to eachother, but also a bunch of friends that are basically considered family, and at no point in the franchise does the romantic relationship get put higher than the familial or platonic ones. Heck, half the franchise I'd about the familial relationships. And even in the ones about romance, the familial relationships are a big part of those too. (There's also quite a bit if gray-rose coding with Drac himself looking back at the series - including the fact the man only experienced confirmed romantic attraction TWICE that we know of despite how much of a charmer he's shown to be. He can flirt until he's actually interested, then he can't function around them. There's also possible internalized aphobia that does get touched on, particularly in HT2 with him trying to make Dennis a vampire but then turning around and saving him from Vlad's "scare the fangs" plan and ultimately coming to accept Dennis as he is - which there's parallels between Dennis and his younger self drawn there.) I'll also point out that despite the "love and family over racism, we're all basically the same" message, love isn't treated as what makes one "human" in the series. If ANYTHING, it's bravery and willingness to take risk. Particularly to have fun OR protect others.

So yeah, kind of mixed feelings there as an aroace fan.

PS: I'll warn you about the HT3 junior novelization, there's a scene of VH dismissing Love as if it means nothing to him which...more aphobic than the scene in the film was. Particularly since Van Helsing gives off aroace vibes himself.

[buddivorce]

and this is what's at the core of this whole conversation really

not to be the too woke friend but sometimes it feels like yall just say "aroace people can still date" as an excuse to ship aroace characters without addressing how their romanticism and sexuality might actually play into said relationship. why do you want them to date so badly Hm

[theactorbat]

Why I don’t like people calling Maomao from The Apothecary Diaries Aro/Ace coded.

Writing helps me organize my thoughts so I want to get this down before I attempt to make a video about it. It’s a subject that deserves to be treated with nuance and care so I will do my best express myself correctly.

Let me start this off by being clear, in no way am I disparaging people headcanoning Maomao as aro/ace or any sexuality for that matter. I personally headcanon her as Demi/Bi. I am only and specifically referring to people implying that she is CANONICALLY aro/ace or coded that way.

I find it unfair for people who are genuinely seeking aro/ace rep to be told that Maomao is that, when she is not. I have seen multiple cases of people who are understandably upset after reading the light novels, because they were told going into it that she was aro/ace coded.

I will be discussing things from the light novels in the rest of this post so bear that in mind and here is your spoiler warning.

Maomao is deeply repressed and in denial of her own feelings. This is something extremely obvious in the subtext of her character, and then overtly revealed in light novel 12. She does, at first, believe that she is incapable of love, but we as the readers also know that that is connected to her trauma and upbringing, along with her skewed perception of sex. She believes her feelings could only bring trouble, so she pushes them down for as long as possible.

For a long time there has been an extremely harmful stereotype that aro/ace people are just repressed and can be “fixed” by the right person. And if Maomao was genuinely intended to be aro/ace it would be perpetuating this really awful and untrue stereotype.

Maomao’s feelings realization and acceptance comes from a very important quote in the story. “I know you have your circumstances, Miss Maomao. It’s important not to get carried away by your emotions! But...” Chue brushed Maomao’s cheek again with her bloodstained hand. “You can’t let that be an excuse either.”

I personally would not like aro/ace being reduced to an “excuse”, frankly I would find that really fucking uncomfortable.

Now onto the sexual aspect of it. Maomao’s only frame of reference for sex comes from the verdigris house. I will tell you this as a sex worker, if you were raised adjacent to this industry and had no understanding of sex outside of the context of SW (and pornographic literature), you most likely would have the same skewed perception of sex that Maomao does. She looks at it like work, a performance. Which is the main reason she is so nervous about it in light novel 13. She is scared her “performance” won’t be good. She knows the mechanics of sex and how to give pleasure, but nothing about intimacy. She’s also pretty clinical about it, because there is political reasons why sex between them could be literally dangerous to the safety of the country…. Not really conducive to the relaxed and fun environment that she deserves for her first time.

But in conclusion, it is very understandable that aro/ace people have found comfort in her as a character, ESPECIALLY anime watchers because the romance subplot has barely even scratched the surface of the long LONG development arc it gets. Headcanons are also always okay, do what you want. Read and write whatever fic you want. But telling other people that Maomao is canonically aro/ace or coded that way is not only inaccurate, but could bring disappointment to people wanting rep, or people hating on the author for “perpetuating bad stereotypes” when she never intended Maomao’s character that way in the first place. This ship has already left the port and has sailed to the western capital and back, there’s no turning around now.

[s0akie]

Honestly? I really love how TMA handled Jon's asexuality.

Asexuality is complex and multi-layered. To understand it fully is to understand the many different types of attraction there is out there, and how to differentiate them from one another. Which is already a complicated enough task when you're ace/aro spec- But even more so when you're Allo, as most of those attractions seem to just morph together.

So, of course Melanie (and potentially Georgie) would phrase it as "He just doesn't."

While I would not have minded for asexuality to be name dropped, this is just as good- if not better. It feels in character, it feels realistic. It tells us something about the characters themselves and how they view and understand Jon's sexuality. That they see it in its most bare bone sense : not having sex.

Whether or not Jon is aware of his own sexuality is entirely up to interpretation as well. While I do have my own personal headcanons, it's perfectly reasonable to assume that he could have phrased it this way himself- Either because that is how he understands it, or just because it is the easiest way to explain it to someone who isn't ace.

All in all! In my opinion, this was really well handled, especially considering it is like, five lines of dialogue in a 200 episodes long Horror/Tragedy podcast.

[catnippackets]

disclaimer: as a sex-repulsed aroace person myself--

on one hand, there is definitely a bit of a double standard when it comes to handling canonically queer characters like, from what I've seen in the circles that I frequent (if you've had different experiences then great but I'm just telling it how I see it). for example, you're morally reprehensible if you ship a canon lesbian with a man or refer to a canon bi character as a lesbian. people will be so angry with you. and it's understandable, since there's so little queer rep in comparison to cishet rep that when there IS a rare actual queer character, the unofficial rule is "don't take that away from them when you add more headcanons to them". like, respect that this one is REAL and NOT just a headcanon. I think it makes perfect sense to feel upset when people take that away, even if it is just fiction and not even canon to the original source. and yet, whenever there exists a canon asexual character suddenly it's all "oh well asexual people can still have sex so it's fine if we headcanon THIS canon sexuality as something different". it makes me feel so genuinely heartache-y and depressed to see ppl ignoring that aspect of a character.

and by "canon" I'm also including characters that were never specifically referred to with a label but are very obviously coded as something, because those characters will still get the "even if it's not stated it's pretty obvious!!" treatment when it comes to showing attraction to the same gender, but not when they DON'T show attraction to any gender. like aro and/or ace coding just doesn't count. I understand that it's kind of hard to represent an absence of something, especially when you're only implying it and not even directly showing it, but it's not impossible. there's a lot of characters that you could argue are aroace coded the same way you could argue a character is gay coded. obviously to a degree every queer identity gets disrespected in fandom and it's something you just kinda have to deal with, but it's easier to notice when it's something you personally relate to. I don't think it would bother me as much if we didn't have that unofficial "respect the canon" rule and everyone just went wild with whatever, but the double standard does genuinely hurt me, especially when I see people I thought were cool about this stuff participating in it. so whenever I see someone fiercely defending an asexual character it really makes me feel good, like I'M being defended, not a random fictional character that I might not even recognize the name of. I feel safe, like that person will respect ME.

THAT BEING SAID,

AS a sex-repulsed aroace person who enjoys thinking about the entire spectrum of intimacy and where a character may fall exactly on that spectrum, ALSO as a person who is aware that "asexual" simply means "does not experience sexual attraction" and not necessarily "is violently repulsed by anything sexual", sometimes I DO want to play out scenarios for my own enjoyment. sometimes I DO want to think hm I wonder where this ace character's line is, compared to a different ace character. I wonder if there is anyone who would be an exception for them, and how they could go about dealing with that exception. I wonder if they're favourable, neutral, or repulsed. if those aspects of their character aren't explicitly stated then what's to stop me from playing around with them and working through my own issues in a controlled and non-canon environment? if they have the same identity as me, I am way more likely to want to play around with them like a doll and perhaps play out scenarios that I might have thought about before but don't actually want to do for real. I'm not taking away their identity, after all; I'm just, in this scenario, imagining this ace character as an ace that might have sex on at least one occasion for whatever reason. either just to try it, or because they do have someone they'd make an exception for, or if they got bored enough, whatever the reason. it isn't quite disrespecting their truth unless it's explicitly stated either in canon or by word of god that it's something they're uncomfortable with. and to be honest, if I see another asexual creator headcanoning a character as somewhere on the asexual spectrum and depicting them in sexual situations, it makes me almost happy, to know that they're still acknowledging that character's canon identity and accepting and exploring the nuance that could come with it, even if I personally believe that this specific character would be repulsed instead of neutral or favourable. there's this understanding of "I'm doing a character study exploration thing", and not "I don't care I just wanna sexualize this character"

but I literally feel GUILTY when I want to write what is essentially a thinkpiece disguised as a fanfiction or original story on asexuality and take an asexual character (canon or coded) and involve them in sexual situations to explore different avenues of the spectrum. I feel like I'm betraying everyone who's like me and is frustrated with how aroace characters are treated within fandom. I'm like "am I being just as bad as those other people who will disrespect a character's canon sexuality just because they think that character is hot and want to ship them with someone? do they do the same thing with other types of queer characters? how does this reflect that person's view of people, if they're explicitly told someone feels a certain way and decides to ignore it for their own amusement? or is it just because they're fictional and not real people and I'm being really sensitive and thinking way too much into it? am I not doing the exact same thing? do I have more credence to explore scenarios like this because I am aroace and sex-repulsed myself and therefore have a pass to do whatever I want and it won't come off as a little weird the way it might if someone who's allosexual did it?"

and these two opinions are at war in my mind constantly. like both of them can and do co-exist but I still struggle to accept that lol

[dropoutconfessions]

It makes me incredibly angry when people say "Riz is canonically aro/ace" and act like you're a horrible person if you ship him with people. Like. Nowhere in the show is it ever stated that he's aro/ace. The conversation people reference as him being "canonically" aro/ace is just him expressing his lack of very specifically sexual attraction, and even then the response from his dad (and by extension Brennan and the show as a whole) is that it's okay, and that it's specifically unclear whether he's ace or whether it's just not something that's happened for him in specific yet. It is intentionally vague as to whether he is ace or not, and there's genuinely zero indication in the show that he's aro other than that he doesn't have a love interest which could be completely unrelated.

Right so I'd like to share my opinion on this for a brief moment. I am still fully here to give people a voice, but this is just, an issue that kinda hits close to home since I'm demiaro.

The most annoying thing in a lot of media is when representation is shoehorned in as a list of labels and buzzwords we're given. Queer people should not have to turn to the screen and say their full identity in order for them to be canonically queer. That's what subtext is for. That's what good writing does. Is not spell it out for you when it's not necessary to do so. They do not need it to be spelt out for it to be very clear that he's ace/aro.

I am going to assume ignorance here instead of assuming malicious intent. The idea that the reason he isn't ace, is because "it's not something that's happened for him in specific yet", is an extremely common thought process behind asexual erasure. I'm sure that's not what you intended, but that is something to reflect on in general.

Both Adaine and Riz have yet to have relationships or display crushes (not counting junior year since most of the evidence comes from sophomore year) . Adaine hasn't gotten an entire nightmare sequence / arc around dealing with here friends all finding partners and leaving them alone. Adaine hasn't expressed or had conversations about any lack of sexual or romantic feels to the extent Riz has. Adaine is headcanoned as ace/aro by some people. Riz is more than that. Riz is very much canonically ace/aro if you do the slightest bit of character analysis. There's accidental coding and then there's Riz Gukgak.

List of every single Riz trait that is hella ace/aro coded

A lack of sexual and romantic attraction to other people (I'm not counting the time where he said he was kinda into Sexy Rat, that whole scene was a bit, and absolutely insane)

Making up a partner/crush in order to fit in (I have 1000% done that and so have a lot of acespec and arospec people)

A fear of being left behind by his friends because of a belief that they will find partners and move on from him, largely caused by alloromantic culture's insane emphasis on how the most important relationship is a romantic one

The fact that almost every other fantasy high pc has been in a relationship or a crush (kristen had tracker and gertie, gorgug had zelda, unit, and mary ann, fabian had aelwyn, ivy, and mazey, adaine had oisin and possibly zayn depends on your interpretation, and fig has had ayda and a string of professionals in a variety of fields across seasons 1 and 2) with only riz as a single character

The fact his sophomore year arc was entirely about his lack of sexual/romantic attraction and fear of being left alone because of it

Like not even a joke, it was that and his dad, that was the whole arc

His junior year arc was also about his obsession to stay together as a friend group, which like I mentioned above, is very clearly based in his asexuality and aromanticism

I am not going to stop people from shipping characters ever. If you want to rewrite character sexualities, that's fine by me, I'm a big believer in "Don't Like, Don't Read". I am not gonna pretend like characters are not their sexuality in canon so that people feel justified in writing their stories. People who rewrite character sexuality can do so without making everyone else assuage their guilt for them. I know I'm on the "piss on the poor" reading comprehension website, but it's not hard to tell Riz is ace/aro in canon, and pretending otherwise doesn't help your case.

[enlichened]

I literally saw someone say laios is too autistic for romance... you guys HAVE to start being respectful to autistic people. like I know he's just a character but its emblematic of real problems. Even if it's just a joke, it is NOT FUNNY to perpetuate ableism in the form of jokes. I see like a thousand posts a day about how he has autistic swag and in the SAME POST joke about how his friends actually hate him, nobody could REALLYYY like him they're all just pretending <3, he's too autistic for sex or romance or love.

He has canonical problems in the text with people pretending to be his friend, or people secretly hating him. We've gone over and over again about how divorcing autistic people and characters from sex and romance on the whole is infantilizing. (individual ace/aro headcanons are fine, but maybe also examine where they're coming from when its characters widely seen as autistic). I feel like a lot of fans don't even realize what they're doing. oftentimes what you think is funny fan content is actually you making fun of him and excluding him from things based on his autistic traits.

And this isn't even MENTIONING the racism in making kabru be aggressive to laios for no reason all the time when kabru has genuine reason and understanding even when he thinks he might need to kill laios. OR how weird it is that people will boil down falin's autistic traits for farcille and say like "yeah she's similar to laios, but she's less of a 'freak' (AKA has developed people pleasing social skills) so marcille likes her still :)"

[aro-absol]

[ID: A picture of the character Yor Forger from the anime series "Spy x family". She's a young woman with long black hair and reddish-brown eyes. She's wearing a tight, revealing black dress with a short trail (?) that has roses printed on the underside. Her golden headband also has a rose on it. Additionally, she's wearing black thigh-high boots. She's holding one long, golden stabbing weapon in each of her hands, and she's looking over her shoulder directly into the camera. / End ID]

Is she aroace?

🧡    💛     🤍     🩵    💙

(Requester asked for whole Forger family, I will split Yor and Loid in two separate polls, Anya feels too young to include)

Reasoning under the cut due to lenght!

The entire premise of the show kicks off because Yor didn't realize that dating was something she was expected to do and had to get into a fake relationship to cover her ass. Many fans run along with this and act like the use of that trope means that she and the other guy must Fall In Love For Real eventually, but Loid/Twilight literally thinks that at one point and brings it up in the show, asking if she's attracted to him and wants to legit become a couple, and Yor's response is to freak out at his misinterpretation and kick him in the head. She cares deeply for the Forger family, as does Twilight, but it's never shown in a romantic/sexual light for either of them. (Funnily enough, the same goes for Anya, who doesn't understand her peers' interest in romance and/or why Damian acts the way he does around her because of his crush. Aroace family baby.)

There's so much sincerity in how their relationship is written and it feels so reductive that people are like "oh yeah, it's because they're Totally Dating :TM:" in a way that goes blatantly against the text just because they care more about shipping than the story. Yor has so many worries about the ways she doesn't fit society's idea of "normal", trying her best to live up to what she sees as her role in the family - and her family isn't normal! It isn't! They're a spy and an assassin and a psychic, who all have identities that the rest of the world can't know. But it's never considered a negative thing by the narrative, and in fact much of the theme of Spy x Family relates to how they make it work and have something precious between themselves anyway. She's a wonderful character, and I just. Have FEELINGS about this cast. Argh. We stan the silly aspecs forever.

[sabianandocs]

I’m very interested to hear your Gaster interpretation as someone who likes to make my own!

Okayokay long ramble incoming- Kind of a mix of my Gaster lore and the Skelebros since they're kind of intertwined for my stuff --- I'll try to break up the paragraphs with doodles so it's not just a block of text

My version of Gaster is a mix between the usual crazy scientist interpretation and also someone who just really really wants to be a parent. (there is an appeal to the version of Gaster that's just.. Awful and creates the skelebros as experiments, but I wanted to go for a little of a more wholesome approach for my lore cuz I feel like they've been traumatized enough lol)

There aren't any other skeletons in the underground except for Gaster, though, and also I headcanon him as aro/ace so he was like. Yeah I'll figure something out on my own. SO! Inbetween working on the Core and trying to find ways to break the barrier, he did studies in his own time on SOUL magic to find out if it was possible to create life only using the SOUL magic of a single monster (rather than the usual two). His research on how to break the barrier overlapped some with this research so he get away with using the royal science lab/materials/etc for it.

Some science junk, blah blah, he found that it could be possible- if he took a chunk out of his own SOUL. And I suppose probably also the chunks out of his hands to provide the physical material necessary (Can thank Handplates for that idea). And that was a sacrifice he was willing to make for Science and also Child.

(The next section is copy-pasted directly from my lore google doc)

Gaster was cautious with his experiments for his first attempt. He didn’t want to risk a huge chunk of his soul on a first try that he thought would surely abort itself, so he only used a little bit, plus the extra soul power he was able to create through his own desire to have kids and probably some sketchy magic injection type stuff.

However, the first attempt didn’t abort. Despite his hesitancy and being sure that this first run would just be a proof of concept, or to just to figure out where things could possibly go wrong and how to fix them (he did all the calculations beforehand and everything, of course, but real life never plays out like the simulations), the soul actually took and began to create itself. He grew it and took care of it in an incubator in the lab, and during this time he slept at the lab a LOT, terrified that something would go wrong if/when he wasn’t there. As time went on and the soul & vessel it created became more stable, he got a little less freaky weird about being away from it for short periods of time.

  I guess probably this process takes about 9 months because??  That’s how long it takes to build a whole skeleton with magic soul power probably?  Idk man.  Anyway because they’re magic skeletons and there’s no reason to ‘birth’ (read: remove from the incubator) the soul & vessel before its able to support itself (unlike humans, who are all born premature because our heads would be too big otherwise) the new skeleton usually starts trying to become independent (get born) around the developmental size that humans would associate with a 1 or 2 year old.  

And thus Sans was created!  Gaster feels extremely guilty that Sans is so weak because technically it’s his fault for not committing more of his soul to him but he’s so so happy to finally have a kid and does everything in his power to keep Sans safe despite his weaknesses and help him learn how to navigate around them (Including sleeping to regain above max HP!)  

When Sans got old enough to kinda do his own thing around Gaster (like 5 or 6?) Gaster decided it was time to make another kid for a number of reasons: 

To redeem himself scientifically: He had proof he could make a living being, but with Sans he’d hesitated and Sans suffered because of it.  He wanted to make another who was more healthy

To give Sans a sibling: Both because Sans seemed kind of lonely and because he figured they would be able to keep each other safe that way- when they got older the sibling could help protect Sans and ‘make up’ for his disabilities by being able to help him out (Gasters view on it- I used airquotes deliberately. People with disabilities can function just fine on their own. Gaster sees Sans' disabilities of a failing of his (Gaster) own so he views it more negatively because he feels guilty about it.)

Because he wanted to: Gaster always wanted at least two kids and now that Sans was a little more stable and independent Gaster could handle the responsibilities & time dedication of having another little one around

And so Gaster did the whole thing again, but took a bigger chunk of his soul this time and probably more sketchy soul injection things to create more soul power.

And blah blah 9 months of waiting and sitting around in the lab being anxious and BAM!  Papyrus is born!

The boys grew up mostly in the lab and around it since Gaster was so involved in his work, but Toriel and Asgore babysat sometimes too (Papyrus’ memories of the ‘green’ but not remembering Toriel because he was too little).  Gaster was a super involved parent as well, and even hired Alphys as an assist in the lab so he didn’t have to spread himself so thin with work and his kids.  (Alphys only worked on vague assistance type stuff, which is why after Gaster got shattered across time she had no recollection of the deeper workings of the Core or of Gaster’s studies- anything that wasn’t erased with Gaster was really vague surface-level stuff)

As time went on, Sans got interested in the science that Gaster was doing.  Sans and Papyrus hung out at the lab a ton, especially as they got a little older and didn’t need quite as much direct adult supervision.  Mostly Sans just watched after Papyrus, but occasionally he’d watch Gaster work instead or in addition.  Gaster taught him as best he could at an age appropriate level, and so Sans ended up something of a scientific prodigy.  Papyrus didn’t take the same interest & spent most of his time pretending to be a knight and/or learning magic instead.  Gaster taught both of them how to fight & how to use magic in his own homeschooling sort of curriculum (Reason why no one knew them before they showed up in Snowdin- they stayed pretty much just around the lab & the castle)

Oh, also, the cracks in Gaster’s skull appeared after each kid!  Because splitting his soul weakened his magical ability it also weakened his physical form somewhat so he got more brittle.  Sans’ soul piece caused the split down his eye to his mouth, and Papyrus’ caused the one from his eye up his skull- bigger & worse because 1. He was already more fragile after having Sans and 2. Papyrus was a bigger piece of his soul

When Sans was 17 and Papyrus was 11, Sans had been actively helping around the lab and the Core for a few years.

Gaster and Sans were running around the core performing some routine maintenance or something but someone didn’t get the memo that they were in the sector that they were in and started rearranging the Core (as you do.  Literally it’s part of how the place works the hallways get rearranged)  Sans was a little behind Gaster because he’d been fixing up some wires or something and so when he went to catch up he saw what happened next but couldn’t do anything about it.

Gaster was stepping between sectors when the rooms shifted.  He had one foot on the next sector and one on the previous, so when they detached and swung out he got flung.  Directly into the Core.  And was shattered across time and space.

When Gaster got disintegrated across time he took people’s memories of Sans and Papyrus too-  Because they shared parts of his soul, they occupied the same parts of people’s memory as Gaster did, which was all overwritten after the Accident.

Sans and Papyrus also forgot most of their direct ties to Gaster- they remembered having a dad, being raised, the things they learned (magic, schooling, etc) but not anything about their dad, or what he did, or who he was.  Directly after the Core Accident, Sans woke up at their house in the Capital (where Gaster and the boys technically lived when they weren’t all at the lab), only remembering that his dad was gone- but not how, or why- and when he dug in his mind for what his dad looked like or who he was, he got a headache and gave up.  Papyrus was also home.  To the best of their collective recollection and filling in gaps with assumptions, their dad had died, maybe recently?  And now they were on their own.  They had no income anymore, or maybe at all ever?  And they couldn’t afford to stay where they were.  The capital is expensive, after all.  And…  And this house was for royal officials and their families anyway, they weren’t supposed to be there.  They made up the idea that they’d been allowed to live there to get back on their feet after their dad’s death (the king is generous, after all) since the place had been vacant anyway and the king/queen/someone official had felt bad for them.  

So they moved to Snowdin!

Aaaand the next chunk of the doc is on the Skelebros so I'll spare you of it since that's not what you asked. Tbh most of this is probably more than you asked but thank you for giving me the opportunity to ramble!!

[cyborg-franky]

Saw that your requests were open and thought I’d stop by!

Could I get headcanons for Zoro, Sanji, and Ace (maybe Law and Luffy if there’s space) with an S/O who’s aroace? Not necessarily sex adverse, just not that into it.

Thanks in advance!!!

Honestly, I was finding it hard to write Sanji like this because.. Sanji so I replaced him with Law as it fit into my current post skip Law headcanon! I really hope that is okay and that you enjoy this.

I am not aro but I am Ace so I understand from that pov. I hope I did this well for you <3<3

Ace, Zoro, Law x GN Reader SFW Sexual themes but not sexual if that makes sense!

Zoro

He doesn’t understand what the label is at first until you explain.

He pauses mid-drink and looks off into the distance as he processes things before he shrugs his shoulders.

“That’s fine. Why would it bother me?” he asked as you sat next to him on the deck. He’s lifting a weight in one hand and a bottle of beer in the other.

“Just means we might not ever have sex or I might not express romantic feelings?” You play with the hem of your shirt now. This was always a complicated conversation to have, worse when it was with someone you were in a relationship with.

Zoro looked at you from the corner of his eye and hummed in thought, only pausing briefly to consider his answer. Sometimes, he put thought behind his words.

“Doesn’t matter. Sex just gets in the way of training right? It’s okay, but it’s not the most important thing,” in fact it was pretty low on his list and even if he was inclined to want sex he wasn’t the type that would put it above his partner's feelings.

“I don’t express my feelings either,” he added as he took a swig of his beer, polished it off, and set it down, his hand now on your thigh, giving a reassuring squeeze.

“Actions are louder than words,” he simply replied and offered you a nod, a smile on his face. Happy when you seemed like a weight had been lifted from you.

Ace

You and Ace are lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling and enjoying the breeze drifting through the open window. You sigh as you work up the courage to explain.

“I’m ace,” you finally announce, and he laughs. “No, I’m Ace. Did you bump your head too hard today? Do you need me to get Marco?” He teases and pokes your side before you huff at him.

“I don’t mean that. I mean like, aroace,” 

Ace furrows his brows as he considers this, thinking about where he had heard that before and it clicked. “Ah, Deuce is aroace too.” he said with a nod and reached to hold your hand.

“I get it, and it’s totally okay. I’m not going anywhere if that's what you're worried about.” 

“But, don’t you have like urges?” you mumbled. This was a big reason why you’d hesitated to tell Ace the truth for so long, you just made excuses for not feeling up for it and he just accepted it. He was in his 20s and you knew he had all sorts of thoughts of a sexual nature.

“Babe, I always have urges but it's not like you aren’t letting me deal with those at all right? Your more important to me than sex.” he squeezed your hand, smiling at you. You wriggled a little closer and nodded, a smile of your own. 

Law

“Law, I have something to tell you,” you said when you entered his office. His eyes widened ever so slightly and his jaw set firm as he waited for you to carry on. The grip on his pen tightened as he prepared himself for whatever bad news you were about to drop on him.

“I’m aroace,” you explained and he exhaled and slumped in his chair, the tenseness in his shoulders from moments before just gone.

“Me too,” he replied and looked back down at his work. His pen returned to its scribbling motions as he made notes.

“Really?” you asked and walked over to him, standing in front of his desk. He nodded with a simple hum in response. “So I get it. I had a feeling you were like me, so I never pushed anything, just waiting for you to indicate anything of that nature.” Law explained, and you sighed, one of relief as you nodded. 

That had been easier than you’d thought. You walked over to his side and gently kissed him on the forehead before grabbing a book.

[specialagentartemis]

Aro- and Ace-Spectrum Murderbot Diaries headcanons

For the beginning of Aromantic Awareness Week, I thought I’d write out some of my a-spec headcanons for TMBD characters!

—

Murderbot: its opinions on romance and sex range from “I didn’t give a shit about [it]�� to “No!” to “No, no thank you, no. No.” This one’s not a headcanon these are all direct quotes haha.

ART: Because of its limited socialization and its only very recent introduction to deeply feeling the things depicted when watching media, I have a hard time imagining ART conceptualizing romance as something it would want or has any reason to want. Its articulation of closeness, commitment, devotion, and duty is crew. I think upon meeting Murderbot, it kind of got friendship for the first time. But Murderbot is also very much part of crew now as well. I don’t see it feeling the need to add romance to that emotional-relationship framework. It’s adventurous with experiences, though, especially with things it might consider gaps in its knowledge; it may be willing to try certain types of intimacy, experience, or sensation out of curiosity.

Three: Still very new to the freedom to name and articulate its feelings and desires, let alone take initiative to act on them when they involve other people. It had a weird and unique kind of closeness with its squadmates: you’re the only one I can trust. We can’t ever trust each other. You understand me. We aren’t allowed to talk about it. Our communications are closely monitored and limited. We know what the limits are and how to express ourselves within them. I care about you. I want you to be safe. Three wouldn’t call it romance but wouldn’t know what to call it at all besides squadmates. If Three identified as anything it would be quoiromantic, quoisexual, quoi-everything: how can it fit its experiences into a framework of sexuality and romanticism.

Ratthi: Aromantic allosexual with a strong belief in relationship anarchy. Takes the viewpoint of, every one of his relationships is different because every person is different! Hierarchizing them or categorizing them is kind of beside the point! Every relationship, family or friend or colleague or coauthor or person he knows from board game night or sexual partner, is something special. Though the most important people in his life include his best friends Arada and Overse, and they consider each other family.

Gurathin: Aromantic asexual. Limited social energy. Spends a lot of time quiet and alone and likes it that way. A few strong friendships, a few work friends, a few scientific colleagues, a cat.

Pin-Lee: Gray-aroace. Romance, dating, or sex is not a particular priority she wants to spend time pursuing, and she gets an uncomfortable stomach-churning feeling if she feels like she’s being expected to tie herself down to a relationship too fast. There’s a lot about her work and her goals and her life she’s not willing to compromise on. If her friendship with Bharadwaj or Mensah became something more squishy and boundary-blending, she wouldn’t be opposed, but she won’t actively pursue it either.

Arada: Demisexual lesbian. Ideal family household is her wife and her best friend.

Volescu: Aromantic heterosexual. The aro allo het man that tumblr warned you about~ Devoted father and husband. Comes from a culture where marriage and romantic desire are a venn diagram of optional overlap more so than a necessary expectation. (This dovetails with my Divarti political refugee backstory headcanon because as you may have noticed I am going full My City Now at this point)

[thatfoolsophie]

nothing to add but i agree 100%!!! i love the line where she realizes she’s into howl and her reaction is “UGH i can’t believe that the suit i accidentally enchanted to make him hot worked on me too!!! this is so embarrassing” and then the narrator is like “unfortunately she was just as into him when he was wearing other clothes” like she’s so in denial GOD BLESS

wait actually i thought of one thing to add, sophie chops the charmed suit up into pieces in the same chapter where she cuts up and then enlarges his other suit (absolute menace) so it’s not even intact when she’s trying to blame it for her feelings

okay i see you’re obviously a fan of hmc, as you should, but i have a question cause i read the book but people on tiktok pissed me off (as booktok usually does i’m about ready to get rid of it) and a lot of people were saying it’s weird that people love the relationship even though sophie “didn’t really love him” because she was charmed. but i was like no y’all i thought she really loved him?? like she stays with him to have a kid right so???

ok. here is a real way to comment on this yippee! this is actually aweslome because i get to do my little sophie rant.

first of all and most importantly - sophie was never charmed by howl. quite the opposite, really, which i would argue is how she fell for him in the first place.

“Oh, confound that gray-and-scarlet suit!” Sophie said. “I refuse to believe that I was the one that got caught with it!” The trouble was the blue-and-silver suit seemed to have worked just the same. She stumped a few steps further. “Anyway,’ she said with great relief, “Howl doesn’t like me!”

this is by far one of my favorite sophie moments in the whole book: and i understand the confusion here for more than one reason (will explain more later!) but clearly she’s using the gray and scarlet suit as a euphemism because she’s in denial. after everything she’s seen of him, sophie refuses to believe that she could fall in love with someone who is so intrinsically flawed—however, as we find at the end of the book—they’re the same in that respect.

howl is by no means a bad person or an evil person in the slightest, and despite herself sophie falls in love with him because of his kindness (like most people do, anyway) here’s some times that they bond …

More about Howl? Sophie thought desperately. I have to blacken his name! Her mind was such a blank that for a second it actually seemed to her that Howl had no faults at all. How stupid! “Well, he’s fickle, careless, selfish, and hysterical,” she said. “Half the time I think he doesn’t care what happens to anyone as long as he’s all right-but then I find out how awfully kind he’s been to someone. Then I think he’s kind just when it suits him-only then I find out he undercharges poor people. I don’t know, Your Majesty. He’s a mess.”

“Behold the new Royal Wizard,” he said. “My name is very black.” Then he began to laugh, much to the surprise of Sophie and Michael. “And what did she do to the Count of Catterack?” he laughed. “I should never have let her near the King!” “I did blacken your name!” Sophie protested. “I know. It was my miscalculation,” Howl said.

Howl pointed a shaky hand up toward the canopy of his bed. “That’s why I love spiders. ‘If at first you don’t succeed, try, try, try, again.’ I keep trying,” he said with great sadness. “But I brought it on myself by making a bargain some years ago, and I know I shall never be able to love anyone properly now.” The water running out of Howl’s eyes was definitely tears now. Sophie was concerned. “Now, you mustn’t cry-”

“If you come out here alone, bring your stick to test the ground with,” Howl said. “It’s full of springs and bog. And don’t go any further that way.”

As she had feared, the hard black-and-white daylight coming through the broken wall showed her that Howl had not bothered to shave or tidy his hair. His eyes were still red-rimmed and his black sleeves were torn in several places. There was not much to choose between Howl and the scarecrow. Oh, dear! Sophie thought. He must love Miss Angorian very much. “I came for Miss Angorian,” she explained. “And I thought if I arranged for your family to visit you, it would keep you quiet for once!” Howl said disgustedly. “But no-”

Howl rose up on his hands and knees with a scramble. “I can’t stay,” he said. “I’ve got to rescue that fool Sophie.” “I’m here!” Sophie said, shaking his shoulder. “But so is Miss Angorian! Get up and do something about her! Quickly!”

Howl looked a little sad, but he said, “We were both hoping you would. Neither of us wanted to end up like the Witch and Miss Angorian. Would you call your hair ginger?” “Red gold,” Sophie said. Not much had changed about Howl that she could see, now he had his heart back, except maybe that his eyes seemed a deeper color-more like eyes and less like glass marbles. “Unlike some people’s,” she said, “it’s natural.” “I’ve never seen why people put such a value on things being natural,” Howl said, and Sophie knew then that he was scarcely changed at all.

and finally…

“Sophie,” said Martha, “the spell’s off you! Did you hear?” But Sophie and Howl were holding one another’s hands and smiling and smiling, quite unable to stop. “Don’t bother me now,” said Howl. “I only did it for the money.” “Liar!” said Sophie.

howl and sophie are meant for each other! they compliment each other immensely, and it’s difficult to describe how well they do so concisely. what i can pin it down to is this: nothing is secret between them. they operate like best friends as well as they do as lovers; they never let anything slide between them! sophie refuses to take howl’s shit when he crosses a line, (and howl vice cersa, especially when sophie is putting herself down) but they also know each other well enough to truly know their intentions when they say anything. a great example of this in hmc is this whole conversation:

“Why did you pretend to run away? To deceive the Witch?” “Not likely!” Howl yelled. “I’m a coward. Only way I can do something this frightening is to tell my self I’m not doing it!” Oh, dear! Sophie thought, looking round at the swirling grit. He’s being honest! And this is a wind. The last bit of the curse has come true! The hot grit hit her thunderously and Howl’s grip hurt. “Keep running!” Howl bawled. “You’ll get hurt at this speed!” Sophie gasped and made her legs work again. She could see the mountains clearly now and a line of green below that was the flowering bushes. Even though yellow sand kept swirling in the way, the mountains seemed to grow and the green line rushed toward them until it was hedge high. “All my flanks were weak!” Howl shouted. “I was relying on Suliman being alive. Then when all that seemed to be left of him was Percival, I was so scared I had to go out and get drunk. And then you go and play into the Witch’s hands!” “I’m the eldest!” Sophie shrieked. “I’m a failure!” “Garbage!” Howl shouted. “You just never stop to think!” Howl was slowing down. Dust kicked up round them in dense clouds. Sophie only knew the bushes were quite near because she could hear the rush and rattle of the gritty wind in the leaves. They plunged in among them with a crash, still going so fast that Howl had to swerve and drag Sophie in along, skimming run across a lake. “And you’re too nice,” he added, above the lap-lap of the water and the patter of sand on the water-lily leaves. “I was relying on you being too jealous to let that demon near the place.”

sorry for the chunky quote, but this is super super important for our two silly little characters and their dynamic!!

and as for the misconception that sophie was charmed by howl:

mrs. pentsemmon actually hints when she meets sophie that she cursed the grey and scarlet suit herself (out of jealousy, though she’d never say it) and the original passage says that;

The trouble was the blue-and-silver suit seemed to have worked just the same.

Sophie knows for a fact that she felt the same about Howl when he was wearing the blue and silver suit that she did when he wore the enchanted one, and she knew from that that she most definitely wasn’t affected by the charm.

also! a little note about misconceptions in general: the first time i read hmc, the ending scene felt out of nowhere. but that’s how subtly dwj worked in the character development throughout this story! at it’s core hmc is a character based story, and howl and sophie are the most important characters (sophie especially!) but in the first read through i think we all focused on the plot a little more since we didn’t know that was what it was. every read through since, i’ve seen how howl and sophie fall in love in real time! and it’s undeniable then. :3

anyways! relationships written by a woman always win fr. thanks for listening to my rant if you made it this far. and my good friend @thatfoolsophie if you have anything to add, please do to this already crazy long post lmao :3

[radioactive-earthshine]

What is your opinion about ace Bart? I've seen some people claim it's ableism to headcanon that.

Hello!

I've talked about a bit about this here and here and most importantly HERE where I discuss that this is a situation where the reason WHY a person headcanoning Bart Allen as asexual is important, as well as how they are depicting it.

Headcanoning him as asexual based on the substantial comic evidence in his solo series is entirely valid and is not rooted in ableism or aphobia! Regardless of the fact he has had romantic and sexual relationships in later comics the headcanon stands because it's just a headcanon and because in real life scenarios a lot of real life asexual people do enter in sexual relationships (and the same for aromantic people in romantic relationships).

Also just headcanoning him as asexual because he has THE VIBE or simply just because is also valid.

Where this headcanon becomes problematic and ableist is when people headcanon Bart as asexual because they are infantilizing him as a character a-la "He's just Timkon's child he has no idea what sex is" when he's 1.) not their child, that was an off-handed joke made once 2.) the same age group as them 3.) shown multiple times to have an understanding of sex, relationships and all sorts of 'adult' themes.

WHY this is problematic (and a shitty thing to do) is because Bart Allen is an autistic coded character, where even his creator Mark Waid supports other people's interpretations of him being autistic although it was unintentional on his part. Autistic people are very, very, very frequently infantilized in real life, in media and in fandom spaces where people often make them child-like when they are not.

This is a form of ableism that not only impacts autistic people, but others who are neurodiverse in different ways.

It is also a form of aphobia as well because it makes the claim that people who are asexual are child-like.

TLDR: headcanoning Bart as ace (or aro/aroace) is not inherently ableism, but if you are only headcanoning him as this because you personally seem him as childish due to his autistic coded behaviors then you're being ableist and an ass.

Final thoughts; Bart is not childish or 'shy about sex themes', he is very much a pretty typical teenager.

[thalfbloodloser]

i wish we had alloaro representation in media. a charming character who fucks - both literally AND aesthetically. one that makes other characters go "wow! they're so cool and good in bed, but ultimately un-datable, because as soon as they sense any romantic intention on you, they flee" (kinda like lucifer morningstar from "lucifer". he's aroallo in my heart)

a character who's funny and has a horrifyingly 80's sense of fashion (they have a curly combed-out mullet and mismatched earrings. you'll find them at pride wearing a corn costume because it "matches the aroallo flag" and they're "being subtle") or one who's the embodiment of a 60's greaser (their motorcycle helmet is themed after the aro flag and the back of their leather jacket says "LOVELESS / LOVE LOSES") or one who's a girly fanfiction writer that has more ships than a star wars movie (their fics are muntifandom-ly famous and most their stuff is covered in yaoi/yuri patches and stickers. everyone thinks they're a hopeless romantic because of it, but that's exactly why they're so big on the fiction ≠ reality discourse) or...

anyone else, really. just ultimately a HUMAN who's casually aromantic. one who doesn't make it a parade but isn't subtle about it, either. will they hold other character's hands? maybe. kiss their cheek? perhaps. hang out with them, on picnics and walks along the river? can't see why not! but platonically. or maybe have them be genuinely romance-repulsed & not so eager to participate in anything socially perceived as romantic. that would also be amazing.

let them express themselves sexually! let them fuck. give them a..."fuckbuddy", if you must. or a best friend who's sexually involved with them - classic romcom material, i know - but without it being "complicated"; because there's no romance involved to complicate it.

give them funny scenes. another character tries to kiss their lips or ask them on a date? they laugh nervously, the scene cuts and we get a hilarious shot of them escaping through the bathroom window. or audibly saying "ew" and then regretting it. another character is struggling to write a romcom/romance book without it being corny? we get a scene where our character casually describes the most romantical (and, to them, unappealing) plot ever - because, much like aces acing the smut department, they're far from misunderstanding what is or isn't heartstopping for alloromantics - only to have the other character stare at them like "?????????? HELLO????". give us a scene of them being confused as to why their hookup is yelling at them for acting "so casual" and responding with a quotable shitty line ("just because we had sex last night i can't call you "bro"? / "what? expected me to marry you or something? get off my bed, it's 9AM" / "would you rather have me mad? sad? what's happening here. give me a hint")

but give them complicated scenes too. scenes portraying the loneliness that comes with being aromantic but not asexual, the lack of community. them talking about how hard it is to maintain sexual relationships just sexual. the painful "breakups" because one of their friends declared their undying love for them but they cannot possibly match that energy, even if they wanted to. have them weep because somehow that keeps happening. the unfairness in being accused of heartlessness and selfishness by other queers. the shame on being told they're fetishistic and the reason why queer men/women/people are seen as sex-crazed or impure.

...anyways, i'm rambling- do y'all have any aroallo ocs? or ideas for alloaro characters? maybe aroallo headcanons? i'd love to know what you think! :)

(don't tag as #ace / #asexual / #asexuality)