#I haven’t seen anyone post these so! doing it myself

[calamityskies]

“What struck me about him and what I’ve kind of talked about since the beginning of working on this project was he was very warm. He loved music. He never wanted to be referred to as Major Rosenthal on the field, he just wanted to be Rosie. He enjoyed getting close to the people he was working with so they felt they could put their trust in him and vice versa. That is something I found very attractive — it’s that balance between his steely determination and his outrageous courage with his warmth.”

Nate Mann for 1883

Photography Ben Duggan

[astronomodome]

recent twitter discourse under the cut bc I hate everything good in the world and love making myself suffer

It just frustrates me so much to see Doc and others hounded so much on twitter for not speaking out about the genocide in Palestine. Of course I have to preface this discussion with saying that yes it is terrible and it’s morally correct to speak out about it and offer resources. However (and I mostly see this on twitter) a lot of the pressure being put on ccs to post about it is not only performative but in fact harmful to the ccs’ wellbeing AND to the cause it’s meant to support.

All the tweets I’ve seen about getting the ccs to post about this issue sort of have this air of moral superiority to them despite coming from a place of genuine concern (I assume), like these youtubers have some moral obligation to do stuff for their fans. Serious world issue aside I think this comes from a very parasocial place, this idea that ccs owe their fans whatever the fans want to ask of them. They’re not your friends. They have thoughts and opinions that you don’t see and they have the right to develop their thoughts themselves just like any other person. So much of this demanding stuff dips into harassment territory and it’s just so disappointing to see.

The worst part, to me, is that the statements that ARE given at that point are meaningless too because they come not from a place of genuine thought and emotion about the issue but because a bunch of twitter users demanded them to talk about it. Maybe they would be able to make a statement more meaningful and helpful than just ‘hey look at these three links’ if they were given the grace everyone else is given to study the issue and speak out if it means a lot to them.

The ccs don’t owe you anything. Get over yourselves. Do what you can to support Palestinian voices, donate, signal boost on your own platform and stop pretending it’s some huge moral failure that a minecraft youtuber won’t tweet what you want them to.

[j-esbian]

does anyone else feel like they need to Make Fan Content That Is Also Good And Interesting in order to make/keep internet friends so as to be worth other people’s time

[always-a-slut-4-ghouls]

My current laptop is a 2015 model and it’s saying I need to replace the battery (this would be the second or third time I think) and sometimes people are just like “keeping that thing going can end up being more expensive than just buying a new computer” but I’m ride or die with this thing. We’re together until god themself takes its life for the final time. I don’t care if its tenth birthday is coming up, we’re in this mess together, and even when I will one day be forced to get a new computer for outdated software reasons, I’m keeping this bitch until they pass on to computer heaven (because it’s been a good computer but my last personal one is in purgatory and my old highschool laptop is in hell) I used my 2014 (or was it 2014?) phone until the screen started to detach from the frame, don’t test me. I’m too stubborn and autistic.

[atrirose]

⠀⠀⠀ ONLY FOR YOU ε🪴⁺ you making them flustered

synopsis : things you do that makes them flustered

ft . bf ! enha x f ! r cw. kissing, skinship .. sfw, fluff ✶ wc. 1k ◜ ◝ seiu : hope you enjoy ^^ its the enha pov of my pervious post that ik i did long back but its alright.

HEESEUNG

his hearts melt when you reassure him, tell him you are proud of him or compliment him, he is a sucker for it, could be any moment and he would just turn into a puddle for it.

he looked at you in disbelief as you emptied his portion of cake that he baked “yn, that was mine you already had yours” he pout, on the verge of tears “baby you baked so good it was so yummy i couldn’t control myself sorry but you are such a great cook” if he had a tail it would have been wagging right now “you think so? oh my okay you know what i will make more for you, im glad you liked it” he rubbed his cheeks on yours , while you celebrated escaping that.

“i’m proud of you hee” you plop yourself next to him as he put his head down on your lap “you did great out there” after a long day work these words are his favorite to hear, it makes it all worth it. he looks at you big eyed

“you make everything fade into the background”

JAY

pda and sweet or flirty messages always gets him smiling, though jay likes to keep it nonchalant and cool on the exterior but if you hold his hand or kiss his cheek in the public his ears will turn read despite his best efforts to stay cool “we are in public my love” he whispers “so what” you smile.

also giggles when you text him, tries his best to not show or answer your text in a fraction of a second and focus on his work but he fails miserably everytime “today was so tiring, i want to stay home with you always” collapses on you, hugging you tight “and you are a meanie too, teasing me like that” you giggled at his whiny voice “you can always come home jay”

“i could spend a lifetime just watching you.”

JAKE

being centre of attention by you, he loves attention but from you only, it makes him giddy “then this step was a little difficult but i worked hard on it, so i guess im good now, maybe?” you were doing your work but jake bust in to show his new dance to you so of course you had to give up everything and watch him “it’s really clean jake you did a great job” you got up from the sofa and pecked his cheek.

his whole face got red, not like you haven’t kissed his cheek before but nothing gets him like you sweet compliments and your dreamy eyes giving him 100 percent of your attention, even if he is trying to pull something stupid.

“i must be dreaming because there's no way you're real.”

SUNGHOON

wearing clothes he picked out, sunghoon takes pride in knowing his girl better than anyone, no surprise he picks up on your dislikes and likes, he tries his best to style something that makes you feel like the most beautiful “i was out yesterday and i thought this white dress would look great on but then i saw this necklace and then i thought its the prefect match so here” he smiles,“thank you so much i love these kind of dresses you know me so well” you hug him, inner him is jumping and rolling.

“i’m ready hoon let’s go” he turns back to see you wearing the dress he bought you “oh my goodness, how can you look so beautiful effortlessly” you giggle at his compliments, he is a gone case, a loser if you may, for you. totally smitten and starstruck.

“how am I supposed to look at anything else after seeing you like this?”

SUNOO

loves handmade gift, it gets his heart racing, he feels the most special when you sit to crochet after learning it online, even though the heart bag looks more like a square he would accept it lovingly, in fact he is the most happiest you would ever see him, he would be seen with that bag at every given moment “i love it no please” he said as you tried to take back the bag “but it’s embarrassing sunoo” , he is the type to have all your handmade cards and notes stacked in a box, polaroids of you and him, all your favorite memories to look back to.

“anything you make for me is never embarrassing, i will treasure everything with my whole heart”

JUNGWON

making direct eye contact or looking at him heart eyes when he is talking, nothing gets him all blushing mess, ears red, hiding his face like you do, you always look at him lovingly, humming and nodding, listening carefully. randomly touching his cheeks or tucking his hair behind his ears, gracing his ears “go on hun”

“no” he said burying his head in his hands, all flustered and red “why not” you giggled “because you are teasing me” he huffed glaring at you “stop playing yn”

“sorry won you just look so beautiful when you talk” you bite his cheeks “ow meanie” — “what were you going to say”

“you are so stunning i forgot what i was going to say”

RIKI

pulling him by his tie to kiss him , him being tall is extra fun when he can tease you when you try to kiss him “riki please” you tip toe to reach his lips only for him to smirk and not help you “please what yn?” you pout at his smug face boasting his height “bend down” you pulled on his tie which caught him off guard, your lips smacked on his.

his hands snaked around your waist to pull you closer him, your body flushed with his, your hands still gripping his tie “you can really make anything possible huh?” he giggled , cheeks red “you can let my tie go now” he tired to free his tie trying to hide the fact his heart is beating so fast “now you get how it feels to me teased” his hands still on your waist, he kissed your cheeks.

“how did i get so luck to be with someone like you”

[saetoru]

✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。09:08 AM — GOJO SATORU.

contents. manga spoilers, satoru keeps the scars bc that’s character development ok, post canon, insecure! gojo / reverse comfort, you sit on his lap, ig angst to fluff, embarrassingly cheesy look away pls :,)

satoru, since he’s come home with those scars, has always evaded your hand. you’ve tried a few times, have reached out to cup those cheeks you miss holding—but he’s managed to grab your hand and kiss it every time.

it’s smooth—like everything else he does, satoru dodges your touch smoothly. with an easy grin. with a teasing glint. it’s slick and all too natural, and almost undetectable. but you know him better. you know him better than anyone has had the pleasure of knowing him, you like to think. and you know that satoru doesn’t let your hand meet his cheek, not even the edge of his jaw, on purpose.

“good morning,” you smile, reaching forward to lay a hand over his face. satoru, with his eyes still closed (as expected), grabs your hand and plants a soft kiss to the back as he hums.

you’re almost certain he can sense the way your lips tug into a frown.

“mornin’ sweetheart,” he says lowly, “watching me sleep? that’s a bit creepy,” he teases.

“i can’t help it,” you hum, “you’re too handsome.”

this is rare—giving satoru compliments easily is rare. usually, you make him work for them, keep him waiting on the tips of toes before finally giving him that praise you know will go straight to his inflated ego. but sometimes, like now, you think he deserves to hear it—unfiltered and raw and filled with truth.

satoru is handsome. always has been. always will be.

“aw,” he cracks an eye open, “maybe i should let myself get scratched up a bit more. maybe you’ll talk nice to me more often.”

“i mean it, toru,” you frown, insisting, “you’re handsome. so handsome.”

your hand reaches for his face again. he turns his head this time, feigning a yawn as he stretches before sitting up. there’s a slight bit of tension in the air now, his lips tighter in his smile as he hums before turning to you and poking your nose.

“well, aren’t you sweet,” he smiles almost bitterly.

you haven’t seen his smile reach his eyes for a while. he doesn’t meet your gaze through the mirror in the mornings as you brush your teeth together anymore, doesn’t wink at your reflection and make you roll your eyes. he doesn’t spam your camera roll with pictures of himself anymore when you’re in the bathroom, doesn’t leave you with those silly faces and smug grins that make good wallpapers. he doesn’t even crack those annoying jokes anymore, doesn’t whine for you to admit he’s the most handsome guy you’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting as his face digs into your neck.

instead, satoru dodges your touch. he kisses you briefer these days, avoids looking in the mirror, smiles like he has to—not like he finds a reason to.

“you don’t believe me?” you ask gently, furrowing your brows, “you know i’d never lie to you.”

“i didn’t say that, did i?” he asks, waving a hand casually. “c’mon let’s go brush our teeth. you don’t wanna kill me with that morning breath do you—”

“satoru, you’re still handsome, you know,” you say gently. you decide to rip the bandaid off as you add, “even with these.”

for the first time, your hand manages to reach for his face without him pulling away. you think it’s more out of surprise than anything, that it’s because he wasn’t expecting you to be so straightforward instead of trying to be subtle like usual. for a second, you think he might just put his infinity up—but he doesn’t ever. not around you.

but you can see it, the way his knuckles twitch a little like he’s clenching them. the way he’s so still, it’s almost like he’s willing himself not to tense. the way he doesn’t even lean into your touch like he always does.

he doesn’t want your hand on his face, but you stroke a thumb over a scar anyway, cupping his cheek as you study his face up close.

it’s still him—still satoru with that sharp nose and those rosy cheeks, still satoru with those long lashes and perfect jawline. there’s rough, marred bits of skin that meet soft, supple ones. you feel over the dips of where each scar starts slowly, committing each one to memory.

they’re newer parts of him, ones you don’t know very well yet, ones that remind you of the ugliest parts of the world—but they’re a part of satoru now, and anything that’s a part of satoru can never be ugly. no matter where they come from, no matter what they’re a reminder of.

not if it’s him.

“you think so?” he asks with a tight grin, “is my money maker still money making?”

“don’t be greedy,” you quip, “you have plenty of money.” and then, softly, you add, “but i’d pay a good fortune or two to wake up to this every day.”

“good thing i give it to you for free,” he hums, “i’m generous, you know?”

“what a catch,” you grin, “generous, strong, rich,” you list, making an amused grin stretch across his lips, “handsome,” you add. his smile falters a bit at that. “satoru, i’m serious.”

“oh, i love when you get all serious,” he whistles. he’s deflecting—you expect him to, but you’re not backing down. one leg swings over his hips, and then you’re climbing onto his lap, right there where he can’t avoid you. but he finds his attention to your lips, still smooth as ever as he avoids meeting your eyes.

“satoru—”

“oh? you want to do this already? it’s barely—” he makes a show of glancing at the clock before turning back to you with a suggestive grin, “—nine am. but i guess we can have a little fun before—”

“i don’t care about these, you know,” you murmur, pulling your head back when he leans in for a kiss. your finger lightly traces the scar by his left cheekbone, making him frown.

“see? you’re basically admitting you have to look past them,” he groans frustratedly—it’s the first time satoru’s acknowledges his scars. it’s the first time he’s finally let himself look upset without trying to hide it behind a forced grin and a dry chuckle.

“i don’t,” you frown, “sure, they’re new,” you admit softly, “and i don’t like being reminded you got hurt. but they’re not ugly—you’re always pretty.”

“there’s so many,” he mumbles, “they’re everywhere.”

“i think they’re cool,” you shrug, “they make you look tougher. less like a spoiled princess.”

“hey,” he pouts, “i’m not spoiled.”

“you’re a bit spoiled,” you chuckle, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck—his lips quirk up, and you can’t help but notice how real it looks for once. “but i suppose you deserve it. not because you’re handsome though. because you deserve good things—just for being you,” you insist.

his lips are quivering a bit, and he’s blinking faster now. you ignore it, though, taking your sweet time as you lean down and kiss along the edges of every scar on his face, tracing your lips along where the old skin meets new.

“that’s cheesy,” he mutters, “now you sound like a therapist.”

“i mean it,” you say firmly, “and i meant it when i said you’re handsome too.“

“handsomest guy you’ve ever met, right?” he bats his lashes—they’re a bit hopeful, though, and you smile as you gently kiss the corner of his mouth before nodding.

“definitely,” you nod, “you’re the prettiest.”

“am i?” he grins, “now i’m more spoiled. who’s fault is that really?”

“i’ll allow it for today,” you snort, “today you can be spoiled. i’ll humble you tomorrow.”

“we’ll see,” he hums.

your hands cup his cheeks as you lean down for a kiss, and satoru’s hands clasp over them gently, holding them in place—and when you kiss him delicately, like the sun meets the moon as your lips touch, like your world revolves around him as you pull him closer, you think satoru is unfairly handsome.

and you’ll have to remind him that a bit more often.

he’s my liddol sourpatch :(

[plegdoctor]

I've been hearing rumors that Bimini is pretty much the Lea Michele of UK2

Bimini can read, so I think you might be a bit off the mark here

[guster-animations]

The Japanese Version of Deltarune

about a week ago i decided to translate japanese deltarune because i was curious and bored. i found a lot of stuff that i haven’t heard anyone talk about before!

i only translated chapter 2 because i got to the cliffs and remembered that watching/playing chapter 1 over and over again is really boring to me. might do it when/if i finish writing the post.

uhhh a few warnings. i’m not fluent in japanese whatsoever (i’m like n4 level? i think?), and i might not explain this very well to people who don’t know anything about the language. if you’re confused about anything i say, just ask and i’ll explain it in better detail.

i got all of the gameplay from tsuwahasu’s playthroughs of chapter 2 (pacifist and weird route), so all of the screenshots will be from his vods. i picked his vod to watch somewhat randomly so i was very surprised when he not only got all the easter eggs/secrets on a blind playthrough besides the egg room, but also beat spamton neo in one try, god damn

also i’m not the first person to look at the jp version of deltarune. please look at these posts/videos if you want to see stuff that’s already known in better detail:

skellfamily (light/dark world writing, characters’ pronouns and speech patterns) | suzyundertale (ch2 character names, some jokes) suzyundertale again (the gonermaker sequence) | duxarcana and halfbreadchaos (character in the code) | kazarinn (comments from the translators)

reblogs highly appreciated—this took a ton of time!!!

NOW.

LET US BEGIN.

first things first. the gonermaker sequence is one of the most well-known differences in the japanese language among lore fanatics like myself.

in japanese, the first character speaking to you (gaster/Geoff) speaks in kanji (normal) and katakana instead of hiragana (not normal, incredibly strange sounding). the character who hijacks the gonermaker at the end speaks differently, with kanji and hiragana (normal). as suzyundertale mentions in their post, the patterns are extremely similar to a certain fallen child from the end of the undertale genocide route.

another well-known lore Thing in the japanese version is that the hidden “scrapped” lines (AKA the person trapped in the code) use very feminine and childlike speaking mannerisms. this makes it very likely that the person is dess holiday

i’m not going to be going over much personal pronoun stuff, because other people have already covered most of that, though i haven’t seen one thing mentioned by anyone else:

seam uses the pronoun “atashi” (あたし), which is normally a very girly pronoun but in this case it’s meant to make them seem old and wise, since it was a more common pronoun in olden times. their other mannerisms are gender neutral and not feminine, but their name is localized to “nui” (ヌイ)— the word for “seam” in japanese, as well as an actual feminine given name.

does the use of “atashi” combined with having a fem name confirm that they are female? i’m 95% sure the answer is no. do those two things lead native japanese speakers to believe that they are female? i have no idea.

light and dark world

skellfamily mentioned all of this in the post i linked, but i have something small to add

undertale uses mainly hiragana in its text for the japanese version, with some small exceptions for when the fourth wall is broken. this is referencing earthbound, which also did this. this carries over to the light world of deltarune, but kanji is used liberally in the dark world. this is explained by toby fox wanting the light world to make the player think deltarune would be like undertale.

that’s all

small jokes and stuff in the localization

the “librarby” misspelling joke carries over, with it being named “toshonka” (the japanese word for library is “toshokan”).

the AGREE2ALL puzzle was changed to say “YEEES20!!”. this can be read as “yes ni maru” (with the number 2 being read as “ni” in jp and “maru” being the word for a circle), meaning “yes to all” just like in english!

the ���apple” keyboard puzzle still says “apple” though ralsei mentions that apple means “ringo” (the japanese word for apple) if you talk to him for a hint.

funnily enough, this joke was kept as is! (“kris, type as i say. f…” “…un!”)

the tasque’s battle lines in english are binary codes, with “me” being 0 and “ow” being 1. this is similar in jp. “nyan” is the equivalent of “meow” in that language, so “ny”=0 and “an”=1. cute!

the “bosom” joke is about the same, if anyone was curious

“breasts / annihilation”

“b…breast?”

“it means tity”

probably my favorite joke in the entire japanese version: in english, before the berdly fight on the roller coaster, he incorrectly refers to lightners as “Light Nerds” . in japanese this is changed to make him use ateji (a combination of kanji that doesn’t mean anything but sounds like an already existing word with their combined readings), calling the lightners 雷斗奈悪 (raitonaa, phonetically similar to the transliteration raitonā which the translation uses). it has the exact same effect (of berdly trying to sound smart but actually being very incorrect), but it’s localized in an outstanding way

“you are filled with the power of not knowing what sugarplums are” is changed to “you are filled with the power of not knowing what christmas pudding is”.

when berdly incorrectly calls susie “susan”, she says “who’s susan?” instead of “my name isn’t susan”. japanese people likely don’t know that “susie” is usually short for “susan”, so it makes sense for her to be even more confused in this version.

the spelling contest in berdly’s flashback is still an english spelling contest, with berdly specifying that it’s english.

instead of saying “susie… a real dragon blazers reference?!” when susie references dragon blazers 2, berdly says, “susie… you’re… a serious dragon blazers player…?!”

on that topic, dragon blazers is instead called dragon blader in japanese. was it called that the whole time? am i misremembering? i legitimately don’t know

the ice-e keysmash puzzle is changed so that you can type it out in japanese as すふぎおろてにぺけなも. it still does not mean anything.

right after susie referenced godzilla with the susiezilla line on the ferris wheel, she references ANOTHER tokusatsu. i think. here (while about to fall on ralsei) she says “ore, sanjou!!!!” (i arrive!), which is a famous catchphrase from kamen rider den-o. i’m like 85% sure it was an intentional reference. den-o is one of my favorite rider shows so this is amazing to me

and lastly. the name of minecrap is changed to マインクシャット (mainkushatto), which seems to be a play on some word plus “minecraft” like in english. i’m not sure what the wordplay is. i’ll get back to you on this

lore-y important stuff

about dess

in japanese, the december typing puzzle still spells out “december” in english.

noelle refers to dess as “onee-chan” (older sis)— it’s common for japanese people to refer to their older siblings like this, and it would be extremely weird if noelle called her “dess”. she could have called her “dess-neechan” or some variation of that, but i highly doubt that the name “dess” is being obscured, especially because “dess” transliterated would sound extremely close, if not alike to “desu” as well as the transliteration of “death”.

the knight

(i took the screenshot and forgot to turn auto captions off, sorry)

this line from a swatchling says something like “it captures the moment where the ‘knight’ creates a ‘fountain’ themself, with their own hands”, but the word for “themself” (みずから/mizukara) is written in hiragana, and “mizukara” could also technically be read as “from water”. was this a deliberate water-darkness parallel? i have no idea.

speaking of water!

the roaring knight is referred to as “咆哮の騎士” (houkou no kishi), the knight of the roaring. the word for the roaring itself, 咆哮, means roar or scream. which eliminates the alternate meaning of roaring (also being possibly defined as the sound of rushing water), but that probably doesn’t solidify “roaring” as solely meaning that. there are a lot of terms in undertale that had multiple meanings, but had to be changed to have only one in the japanese localization. “roaring” might be similar to those instances.

angel

spamton calls noelle an angel just like in english, referring to her as “angel-chan”. if there’s somehow anyone out there that didn’t think that line was important, i am here to prove you wrong!!!

more interesting:

this is the line where noelle says that if this was a dream, she would grow wings and fly away— but in this version, she says “big angel wings” specifically. very interesting!

the two (2) other notable changes in weird route

the infamous “you whispered noelle’s name…” line is slightly different. slightly.

the “kris called for help” lines still say that kris is the one doing it, but this one does not say the subject at all. this is normal for japanese, regardless, it’s still very interesting that it doesn’t say “you”. it is still differentiated from the “kris” lines, but not specifically referring to you (the player).

the other difference is so minor that i’m not even sure what it is or if it’s different from the english version.

translation

EVEN IF YOU [Shout] AT THE [Receiver]

YOUR [Voice] WILL EVENTUALLY WITHER

YOUR [Voice]

THEIR [Voice]

AND YOU WILL realize you’re alone.

i do not know who “THEY” is that spamton’s referring to. the term he uses is gender-neutral and singular. is he talking about the player? idfk probably not

miscellaneous spamton-related stuff

spamton’s speech patterns are entirely different in the japanese translation, but they get the same message across. they include:

switching between formal and informal language

using weird mixtures of hiragana, katakana, english letters and kanji

using katakana re (レ) instead of hiragana shi (し)

cutting off words

random spacing

and occasionally using “die” and “death” as homophones for “dai” and “desu”

it’s so wacky and unnerving and strange, i love it :D

other spamton lore bits:

mike’s name is the same (マイク maiku). i somehow forgot to translate the mike-related dialogue. i will get back to you all if there’s anything of note.

the word for “garbage noise” is 雑音, with about the same meaning. unsurprisingly, the same word (the exact same phrase, in fact) is used for both the addison’s line and the gaster phone call line.

the last thing (i think)

in the roaring cutscene, the japanese word for “chaos” is said (in the “all will be plunged into chaos” line), but then says the transliterated version of the word (カオス) in parentheses. tsuwahasu noted that it’s “keyword-like” in the playthrough i watched. is this important? i have no idea

i’m sure there are things that i missed here, so (again) if you want to know about something, don’t be afraid to ask!! the jp version of deltarune should be looked at a lot more—not just for the lesser-known lore tidbits, but also for the cool stuff that was changed to fit the language. it’s a really cool localization!

[jake-whatthefisgoingon-kiszka]

𝒫𝒶𝓇𝒶𝓁𝓁ℯ𝓁 𝒫ℯ𝓇𝒸ℯ𝓅𝓉𝒾ℴ𝓃𝓈

Here we finally have my janny x reader request that has morphed into this massive… thing (and yes I did not have a name for it until yesterday 😅). I tried to make Jake as subby as possible but he ended up just turning out to be a sweet little bean. Sorry if the ending seems rushed, I was kicking myself to wrap this up so I can post and you know I’m bad at endings. Please read all the warnings because there’s a lot going on here…

Pairings: Jake Kiszka X Danny Wagner X plus size fem!reader *includes slash

Warnings: 18+ only! Not for the faint of heart! Lots of adult content including: some angst, some jealousy, drinking and smoking, body insecurity, lots and lots of smut including: oral m&f receiving, fingering m&f receiving, squirting, some protected and unprotected sex, anal rimming, cum swapping, double penetration, threesome, college AU

Word count: 12k!

“So, what are you going to do?” You asked as you laid on your back sideways on top of the neatly made bed with your long hair hanging over the edge of the tiny mattress. You’d never met a boy who liked to make their bed, especially not a college boy, but Jake had always been the meticulous type. Even his textbooks were in a tidy row across the desk he sat at now as he tried to focus on his homework and talk to you at the same time.

“I don’t know, we can always just go together. Everyone already thinks we’re dating anyways” he replied without looking up from his page, like he hadn’t given it enough thought to be concerned at all.

“Maybe that’s why you can’t get a date,” you offered with a click of your tongue. “Am I cock blocking you Jakey?”

“I assure you, that you are not” he finally let his eyes flicker over to you, giving you a pointed look that you knew after all the years being best friends meant please change the subject.

You ignored him, as did a best friend, and continued on as you stared up at his ceiling. “I don’t know why you want to go to this stupid frat party anyways, you hate jocks”.

“I don’t want to go to this party” he corrected you after scribbling something into his notebook. “Josh wants me to. And besides they’re not all jocks, some of them are pretty cool guys”.

“Right…” you trailed off for a bit. Of course it was Josh’s doing to have Jake at this party, it was his own fraternity anyways.

“That’s why you should come too. Maybe you will meet someone there” he offered.

“Meet someone?” You scorned the idea. “At a couples party at a fraternity? What’s the deal with that anyways?”

“I don’t know, it is kind of weird” he shrugged, “I already told Josh I’m not finding a date so if he wants me to come then he can figure it out”.

“I think you should try to find someone. I haven’t seen you date anyone since Meghan broke up with you last fall semester. But to be honest that’s what you get for dating a girl named Meghan”.

Jake sighed, admitting defeat and putting his pencil down so he could turn in his chair and face you. “I’m not looking for a date”.

You quirked a brow at him, seeing him upside down from where you laid. “Why are you so against it? There’s really no one you’re interested in?”

Even from this angle, you could read Jake’s face easy as he read those complicated biology textbooks. “Wait! You are interested in someone aren’t you!”

“Will you leave it alone already?” He groaned, “and get your feet off of my wall, you’re going to leave dirty foot marks all over it”.

You grabbed one of your legs that had been propped up against the Sheetrock and looked at the sole of your foot. “They’re not dirty. Come have a look and tell me who it is you’re crushing after. I can’t believe you’ve been holding out on me”.

Jake did join you on the bed, but only so he could wrestle your legs down which ultimately ended up in you with your head facing the end of the bed now and Jake on top ticking you into submission. You used to hate being tickled, didn’t like the feeling of others touching you around your midsection like that, but after so many years of being close with Jake it didn’t bother you to be a little more physically intimate with him.

That's why you’d ultimately asked him to be your first. It was the summer before you both joined college, neither of you had been with anyone before and it felt like the time was right to make that step with someone you trusted. Jake had always been there for you, and you him, and losing your virginity together had meant the world to you even though you both agreed to just stay friends.

Since then you’d slept together once more, at the first college party you went to, both getting drunk off your asses and falling into bed together in a fit of giggles. There wasn’t anyone you trusted more than Jake, and you hoped he felt the same way about you, which is why you wanted to know his secret.

“Are you going to tell me who it is or not?” You pushed at his shoulders, though not very hard because you actually didn’t really mind him being close. “Why can’t you just invite them to the party?”

“Because they’re already going to be there” Jake let slip, though he quickly tried to cover it up by tickling you again.

Just when you were sure you were about to knee him in the side if he didn’t stop, a quick light knock came at his bedroom door followed by the sound of it opening.

“Hey Jake-” Danny was abruptly cut off as he accidentally walked in on Jake scrambling to get off of you, both of you looking disheveled even though you were completely innocent.

You quickly pulled your shirt down from where it had risen up as Jake’s fingers poked and teased, hiding your stomach before Danny could get a look.

“Sorry” Danny quickly tried to turn around and leave but Jake jumped from the bed and grabbed his arm.

“No no it’s alright” Danny turned back around and you sat up as you watched Jake fix his hair back into place. “What’s up?”

“I was just going to ask if you could give me a ride to the party tomorrow night. I’ve got a study group in the afternoon and Josh will already be at the house setting up”.

“Yeah, of course” Jake easily agreed without a second’s hesitation.

You looked up at the two of them, debating on whether you should stay out of it, but ultimately decided being mean today was more fun. “You know, Jake hasn’t even gotten a date for that party yet”.

“Shut up! Yes I have!” He lied as he glanced over his shoulder at you, his face turning beat red.

“Oh, don’t worry about it” Danny replied, “I’m just taking a girl from my study group. She’s gonna meet me there. A lot of the guys are just bringing random girls as dates anyways”.

“Hmm, why make it a couples party at all then?” You questioned. Since Danny was in the fraternity too, you figured he would have more of an idea, but he just shrugged.

“Don’t know, I just show up when and where I’m supposed to be at this point”.

“So, meet here at 8 then?” Jake butt back in, not trying to hurry Danny out of his room, but also not wanting you to spill any more of his information.

“Sounds great” Danny nodded and when he left the room Jake exhaled slowly. When he shut the door again you could see the light blush that filled his cheeks, and he fidgeted with his hands as he paced across his room in a way you’d only seen him do a few times before, when he was really nervous.

You looked back at the closed door, then back at the state of your friend, and started to put two and two together. “Oh my god” you muttered, breaking him from his trance as his eyes flicked over to you. “It’s Danny isn’t it? You like Danny?”

“Shush!” He ran back over to the bed, worried that if the man in question was still in the hallway he’d hear you.

“Why didn’t you tell me!” You whispered harshly, grabbing his hands and pulling him back into the bed next to you.

“It just happened” he tried to explain, but you knew better. Jake didn’t get this way about someone overnight. “I mean I’ve always liked him obviously, but before he was just my kid brother’s friend, but here recently I don’t know…”

He trailed off, like he didn’t know how to explain the feelings that had been mixing together in his mind. “I get it” you spoke for him, “Danny’s hot. He’s always been a nice guy, and a great friend to Sam, but we’ve grown up now and he has too”.

He agreed it made sense. You had all found yourselves in college, Jake had discovered his love for marine biology and was studying to get into a program for next summer. Josh, well Josh had always been a theater kid, but in high school it was more of a clique, in college he could take it seriously.

You had bloomed in your years here, coming out of your shell as the quirky shy girl that hung around boys because you didn’t feel like you fit in with the teenage girls who cared more about hair and nails than the books or other ‘nerdy’ things you found interesting.

It wasn’t like you didn’t crave that sisterhood the girls in your year had. You liked makeup and dressing up, but even then looking at the other girl’s, thinner, with smoother hair and more expensive clothes, you never felt their equal. Being around society’s definition of pretty had made you doubt your own beauty, but having moved away from your small hometown and met so many more people, expanded your horizons a little, you were able to take a step back and realize that you were your own definition of pretty and that was truly all that mattered.

“Well,” you pulled his hand into your lap, giving it a light squeeze, “what can I do to help?”

One thing you didn’t tell Jake was that you too had a bit of a crush on Danny. You understood what Jake meant by always liking him. Since you grew up being best friends with Jake, and Danny grew up being best friends with his brother, your paths were always crossing.

From a young age you felt butterflies in your stomach when he was in the same room, lost your words when he’d talk one on one with you, even daydreamed a time or two about what it would be like to confess your feelings, but you were sure he didn’t like you that way. You had never bothered Jake with telling him about your crush either, because you felt like it would never happen. Especially now, Danny seemed out of your league. So you pushed your own heart aside for Jake, and hatched a plan to bring the two of them together.

“Hey! You’re coming too?” Danny asked when the three of you all prepared to load up into Jake’s car with the extra keg Josh had text him last minute to bring.

“Yeah, I’m his date” you made air quotation marks with your hands making Jake roll his eyes as he tried and failed to load the keg into the trunk.

“Let me help you with that” Danny came behind Jake, placing one of his hands on top of Jake’s and the other a little spaced apart so they could lift it up.

“Great team work guys!” You called from behind, giving two thumbs up and an awkward smile. Your hands fell back to your sides when they both stared blankly at you, your palms clapping against the tight black jeans covering your thighs. “Right, well I’ll take the backseat, Danny you got shotgun”.

“Oh no that’s alright! You sit up front with Jake” Danny tried to argue, but you were already popping open the door and climbing inside.

Sliding into the middle seat, you leaned over the center console. “Your hair has gotten long Danny”.

“You think?” He chuckled as you played with a ringlet that sat at shoulder length.

“Yeah, Jake was just telling me that he really likes the way you’re doing it now. That must be a tedious routine”.

Danny glanced over at Jake, who kept his eyes trained on the road for more than one reason. “I can umm, give you some pointers if you want?”

Jake’s shoulders dropped and his grip on the steering wheel tightened. Of course Danny didn’t mean to insinuate that Jake needed some pointers. He just wanted to be nice and he had learned a thing or two about hair care.

“Is Sam coming to this party?” You questioned next, trying to keep the short drive over to campus filled with conversation.

“No, he’s got a shift he couldn’t get out of. Plus he didn’t really want to come anyways”. Danny answered.

That’s good, you thought to yourself. So you wouldn’t have to deal with trying to steal Danny away from Sam, just whoever this girl he had invited as his date. Shouldn’t be too hard.

When you arrived Jake and Danny carried the keg inside. You were a little late since Danny’s study session had gone longer than he expected, but neither you or Jake minded since most of the party was already a few drinks in and having a good time. Which meant less awkward social interactions if everyone was already a little tipsy.

“M’lady” Danny offered you the first plastic cup that was filled with beer once the keg had been successfully tapped, something you were surprised you enjoyed watching since Danny was actually really good at it.

Sometimes you forgot Danny was in the same fraternity as Josh was, just because he seemed a little more down to earth and easygoing than what you pictured a frat guy being, but seeing him like this, bag pulled backwards over his dark curls and making himself right at home, was really putting it into perspective for you.

Danny started to pour another drink for Jake next, but you quickly snatched that cup from his hands too. “Nope, I’m driving back so these are my only drinks, but I see shots over there for you two”.

Danny followed your line of sight through the kitchen to the opening for the dining room where a rowdy bunch were lining up little clear plastic shot glasses and pouring them full with a variety of bottles scattered all over the table.

Once the group had taken their shots, they cleared the room and you stepped up next, placing your beers onto the table to free your hands. “Alright, pick your poison!”

You shuffled around the bottles, the light plinking sound of glass filling the room as you tried to remember any of the fancy shots you’d learned to make the summer you turned twenty-one, bar-backing at a restaurant with a few of the girls you’d met at the university. “Unless you’d rather have what Jake’s having?”

“Oh? You know what Jake likes?” Danny moved aside and let you continue your search just as your eye caught the perfect bottle.

The man in question was waiting against the wall, arms crossed over his chest and an amused smirk on his face. Despite the small hick up in the car he was enjoying watching you attempt to get Danny worked up- and if he had already had something to drink then maybe he wouldn’t feel so guilty about staring at your ass as you leaned over the edge of the table to reach the large skinny bottle all the way in the back.

“Yep, Jake likes it tall,” you lined up two of the little plastic glasses right next to each other and started to pour the clear liquid in both, all the way to the very top as you continued to speak, “smooth”, you only spilled the tiniest amount when switching over to the next one, “and sexy”.

Danny raised a brow as he took his shot from the table, careful not to make a mess though it was nearly impossible with how close to the lip the fill was. Jake pushed off the wall and moved between you and Danny, taking his own.

“Cheers” you retrieved one of your cups and held it up. The two boys mirrored your movement then both turned to each other as they knocked the alcohol back. You tilted your cup to your lips too, chugging the rest of the beer down in one go.

“Tequila?” Danny pointed to the bottle you had poured from, still tasting the burn on his tongue. “I thought you liked bourbon?”

“Don’t tell me she knows me better than you do” Jake taunted. He picked up the tequila and filled both of their glasses up again, not quite to the top this time. “Bourbon is for when you’re being a gentleman. Tequila is for when you’re up to no good”.

Danny took his second shot and wiped his mouth dry with the back of his hand. He didn’t often take two shots back to back, but it was a party and he was with friends, so he figured it wouldn’t hurt to have a little extra this time.

“Come on” you playfully grabbed Danny’s hand and started to pull him towards the sound of the rest of the party. “Let’s see how long we can keep you from your date”.

A good half an hour passed and you were nearly done with your last cup of beer before the three of you were ever interrupted. Josh stole Jake away first, and then Danny’s date finally seemed to care that he was here now that it was just the two of you standing around and chatting.

He had pointed her out nearly as soon as you arrived. She was a gorgeous girl with fair skin, dark auburn hair pulled into a tidy high ponytail, and she was wearing a tight dress that showed off her slender frame. Up until now she had been socializing with a group of guys from the fraternity, no doubt thriving on all the attention they gave her, but currently she was approaching Danny with a deceitful smile like she hadn’t just been ignoring him.

“Hey, glad you could make it” he greeted her as well as introducing you as one of his close friends.

“Nice to meet you” she turned her smile to you and you nod your head slightly with a strained “yeah, you too”.

You weren’t trying to be bitchy to her, but it was hard to not lose a little self confidence when standing next to someone who seemed so perfect in comparison, and that it pissed you off. Danny mentioned that she looked good and she played it off with a giggle, agreeing that he usually only saw her in sweats at study group, not dressed up like this. They looked like they would make a good couple, and it worried you that maybe Danny’s attention might’ve been caught elsewhere before you could help Jake make his move.

“So who was that guy standing with you earlier?” She asked Danny. So she had noticed them earlier.

“Jake?” Danny replied in question, unless she was talking about Josh for the brief moment he was there Jake had to be the one she was referring to.

“Is he part of the fraternity?” She glanced around the room, searching through the faces of party goers but coming up empty.

“No, his brother Josh is though. They’re around here somewhere”.

“Do you think you could introduce me? He’s really cute”.

Now you had every right to be possessive over Jake, even if you weren’t dating, and your anger flared up at her bold request. She was supposed to be Danny’s date and here she was asking him to introduce her to another guy?

Before you could open your mouth to say something to her that you would probably regret, Danny calmly and politely declined with a curt “he’s not available”.

It was curious to you that he’d chosen that excuse. Danny was close to Jake, he knew Jake was single, but it sounded like he didn’t want her making a move on him just as much as you didn’t.

“Oh” she sounded a little taken back by his short answer, like maybe she wasn’t accustomed to being rejected, but quickly pulled her smile back on and continued talking with Danny like it hadn’t even happened.

With your beer now gone and your nerves already shot, you leaned over to Danny. “I’m going to go find a bathroom, do you know where I can find one more private?”

“Yeah, just around the corner there” he nodded towards the opposite end of the packed living room, “take the stairs, if anyone tries to stop you just say I sent you up”.

“Thanks”. You slipped away, checking to make sure Danny was still talking to his date and not watching you make a wrong turn to go and find Jake.

When you found Jake you quickly grabbed his hand and pulled him away from his chatty other half. Though he was glad you’d come to save him, he warily asked where you were going as he followed you up the stairs. You got some funny looks from the few who did see the two of you sneaking off, but thankfully no one tried to stop you.

“I’m going to talk to Danny. Get a feel of the situation” you explained as you found an empty room you could set them up in. “Give me like fifteen minutes then head back up here, okay?”

“I don’t know…” he began, looking around the random room. It was just an additional sitting area, smaller than the living room downstairs, with a few lounge chairs and a collection of gaming consoles hooked up to the obnoxiously large flatscreen. Exactly what you’d expect in a house where a bunch of college guys lived.

“Trust me?” You asked.

Jake faced you again, and nodded his head. “Yeah, I trust you”.

“Great!” You leaned over and placed a quick kiss to his cheek. “Hopefully the next time we’re in here someone will be getting kissed on the lips”.

Jake smiled and shook his head before going off to find somewhere to entertain himself during the wait.

“Danny, can I talk to you for a sec?” you leaned against the bannister of the staircase as he walked by, two drinks in hand. One for himself, and the other you assumed was for his date.

“Sure” he easily agreed, and handed one of the drinks off to a random stranger before following you back up the stairs.

You hoped this would be the last time you’d have to climb these damn stairs as you led him to the room you’d decided on earlier. “I wanted to ask you something”. Though you were unfamiliar with the house, only having just found this room earlier, Danny was well accustomed to roaming around here and knew exactly where you were heading.

“I wanted to ask you something too” he revealed, moving to set his drink down on the ledge of a fireplace inside.

“Oh,” you stood your ground as he approached you, and for some reason your heart started to beat wildly in your chest. It was dark in the room, neither having bothered to find a light switch, but the large open windows let enough moonlight in that he was completely visible. He was cast in an ethereal blue glow just like how you’d imagined him sometimes in your daydreams. “You go first”. You pushed, trying to sort out your thoughts and focus on why you were here in the first place, for Jake.

“I’ve been picking up some… signals tonight, I wanted to make sure I wasn’t just reading into things”.

So your plan had been working, you let a smile slip. “No, no, you’re right we have been trying to get your attention”.

“If it’s my attention you want, you have it” he continued, coming to stand right in front of you.

“Well,” you nibbled on your lip, somehow nervous when before you’d been nothing but confident. “Someone likes you, and I wanted to see how you felt about it first”.

“Someone likes me?” He raised his brows with a light taunting chuckle, “and who would that be?”

Before you could answer him, clarify that it was Jake that you had brought him here for, Danny bridged the gap between you, letting one hand rest on your hip and the other cupping your face as he pulled you into a kiss.

You didn’t let your eyes close, and though every fiber in your body screamed at you to kiss him back, you were still as a statue. Danny pulled away and searched your expression for an answer to your hesitancy, and behind him you saw something that made your heart drop into your stomach. Jake had come just like you’d asked, and he’d seen Danny kiss you.

When Jake saw that you had noticed him, he quickly turned and fled, falling back into the dark before you had the chance to say something other than “Jake!”

“What’s wrong?” Danny asked, concerned that the bewildered look on your face was his fault for moving too quickly.

“I’m sorry,” you instantly apologized, though you really hadn’t done anything wrong on purpose, a reflex that still clung to you after years of feeling insignificant. “This is wrong Danny, I can’t”.

You tried to escape, run after Jake and plead for him to forgive you, but Danny caught your arm. “Wait! I don’t understand. I thought you said you liked me?” He was more confused than ever, not having seen Jake, though by your call of his name he gathered he had something to do with it. “Are you and Jake together?”

Your brows furrowed in frustration. You didn’t want to lie to Danny, but you didn’t want to betray your best friend's trust, and the truth seemed more complicated now than it ever had been before. “No, we’re not together. Not right now at least. It’s just Jake, he’s the one that likes you. I brought you up here to meet him”.

“Oh…” Danny’s hand that lingered on your arm dropped to his side as he tried to process the information you’d given him. One question still remained at the front of his mind though. “So you don’t like me then?”

“I-” your throat clenched before you could form the words you knew you needed to say. You needed to tell him no, you didn’t like him for the sake of your friendship, but instead what came out was. “I do, Danny”.

“I can’t though,” you quickly continued, trying to make up for confessing with rationalization. “Jake means the world to me, I could never do anything to hurt him. So I need to find him, please, I need to tell him this was all just some huge misunderstanding”.

“I don’t want it to be a misunderstanding though” Danny pleaded. “I like Jake” he wasn’t afraid to tell you that, and honestly if Jake had still been here right now he’d tell him too. “But I like you too. I just never said anything because I thought you were with him. I mean even if you guys say you’re not together, everyone can see the chemistry there”.

“What are you saying Danny?”

“I’m saying I like both of you” he couldn’t help the anxious huff and smile as he admit what he’d held a secret for so long. “I’ve thought about being with both of you before, I just didn’t know either of you were into me like that”.

“With both of us?” Your voice came out in a doubtful tone, though the idea was already causing butterflies in the pit of your stomach.

“Is that okay? To like both of you?” He sounded apprehensive of himself now, his shoulders slumping like he was shrinking in on himself.

“I-” you stumbled over your words again, feeling your face flush when you really allowed yourself to think about it. “Yes, that’s okay with me, but Jake…” you were afraid to agree to it now. Though you claimed to know Jake better than anyone else, except maybe his own twin, you didn’t want to speak for him on this matter. Especially not after you’d just seemingly broken his trust.

“I know” Danny wrapped his arms around your shoulders and pulled you into a tight, all encompassing hug. “Let’s go find him and clear this up”.

The two of you found Jake outside, sitting on a bench with Josh who was the only one to regard your presence when you joined them on the patio. Jake had a joint perched between his fingers, the cherry lighting up as he took a drag and exhaled slowly.

“I’m going to go back inside, it’s a little chilly out here” Josh mentioned as he stood and nodded in your direction before turning back to his brother. “If you need anything just let me know okay?”

Jake was silent, taking another inhale then letting his hand settle against the armrest so the ashes would fall to the ground instead of in his lap.

“What did he tell you?” You whispered as Josh passed by.

“Nothing. He just pulled me out here and demanded I light one up for him. He’s lucky I was saving that one for after the party”.

“He’s going to be alright” Danny assured him, and Josh left you to work it out amongst yourselves.

Danny moved to take Josh’s place next to Jake on the bench, but between the two of them there wasn’t much room left to sit. You stayed off to the side, mostly keeping your distance in case Jake really was as upset with you as you knew you deserved to be.

“Hey there Jake” Danny began softly, trying to win him over with honey before jumping into the explanation for what he’d seen upstairs. “Can we talk?”

“Bout what?” Jake nearly croaked out, his voice half shot from the smoke, but you could tell it was also because he was holding back his emotions.

Your eyes prickled for him, but you dried them quickly with your hand. He hadn’t yelled at you yet, cursed the both of you and ran you off the patio, so there was hope yet he’d hear you out. No doubt the accompaniment of the weed was helping keep him calm.

Danny took his hat off and placed it on his knee, running his fingers through the tangles at the crown of his head a few times before leaning back on the bench. “Remember that summer when we all went to the beach? We rented this huge house with like six rooms. Sam brought this girl he’d only been seeing for like two weeks and it pissed everyone off because it was just supposed to be a family trip”.

Your heart went sore as you easily remembered the trip Danny was referring to, having been so excited to be invited and considered a part of the family just like Danny was. It was a short vacation over the Labor Day weekend which meant the beach was so busy, but that didn’t stop you from having the best time of your life.

“She ended up being a really nice girl” Jake mentioned, “Sam’s an idiot for letting that one go”.

“I agree with you there” Danny chuckled, not in too much of a hurry to get to the point of bringing up this story. “You two were inseparable that weekend” he glanced over at you, trying to encourage you to come closer. You did, inching forwards until Jake’s eyes flickered over and you halted like a deer ready to run from a sniper in the woods and his piercing gaze.

It felt like so long ago, even though in the grand scheme of your relationship over the years not much time had really passed between then and now. You weren’t sure how much everyone knew about you and Jake around that time, didn’t really care about what details he did or didn’t get into with his brothers, but the night before leaving was the party you had both gotten really drunk at and slept together for the second and last time. In the morning you were so terrified Jake would put some distance between you, even debated not taking the trip with them all together so he wouldn’t have to feel awkward about what had happened, but Jake clung to you the entire time.

That weekend was probably the closest you and Jake had ever come to being a legitimate couple. Every chance you got he was at your side, holding your hand, even giving you good night kisses. And yet when you got back home, back to school and work and reality, things just went back to normal.

“I remember one night, after spending all day at the beach Sam and Josh went to bed early but we stayed up to watch a movie together. You fell asleep first and I tried to get her to bed, but she wouldn’t leave you alone. So I got your blanket from your bed and she cuddled up next to you on the couch”.

Though Jake wasn’t speaking much, his face showed that he remembered the night. He remembered waking up early in the morning with you underneath his arm on the couch, not knowing how either of you had ended up that way and with a blanket too. Now he knew he had Danny to thank for that.

“I went to bed so envious that night. I mean I have Sam, and I’ve dated my fair share, but I don’t think I’ve ever come close to having what you two have”.

Jake let his eyes finally meet yours now, and he could tell you were still on the brink of tears. His brows furrowed, he didn’t want to see you upset but he was still a little hurt, and waiting for Danny to get to the part where he would be telling him he wanted you for himself. That’s what made this so difficult, because not only was his crush being taken away but he felt like he was going to lose you too.

“So tonight,” Danny continued and Jake took one last hit off his joint in preparation, “I know there might’ve been some misunderstandings, and I just want to clear the air. I don’t know what I can offer that you don’t already have, but I’d very much like to, if there’s room for me, stay with both of you”.

“With her?” Jake asked, trying to clarify what he thought Danny meant.

“With her,” Danny repeated, but took Jake’s free hand in his own, “and you”.

Danny didn’t want to make it sound like the two of you had decided this without him, you both wanted Jake to come to a conclusion on his own, hoping on bated breath that he would agree as well.

He thought about it for a moment, honestly not having even considered this was an option when he’d seen the kiss upstairs. He automatically assumed Danny wasn’t into him that way, and there was still a part of him that doubted whether Danny was doing this truly to be with him too or if it was just a ploy to get to you. Danny had never been the deceitful type though, so he chose to believe he really did want this, and Jake wanted it too.

Even though it had been so long since there had been sexual intimacy between you two, Jake never stopped wanting you. It was hard sometimes when you came over and laid on his bed like it was your own, let your guard down and made yourself comfortable and easy for the taking. All he’d have to do would be to crawl into bed with you and he knew things would easily progress from there, but you had never expressed any real desire to be anything more than friends. So held himself back, looked for reprieve in others like Meghan, but no one ever compared. Until the crush on Danny developed.

“I think…” he trailed off for a moment as he turned his hand over in Danny’s and laced their fingers together. “I’d like that too”.

Danny let out a relieved laugh, so glad his little story time actually worked because he’d had no back up plan other than to both beg him for forgiveness. “Thank fucking god. Can I kiss you too then?” He thought it would be a good thing to ask this time, just so he didn’t put anyone in a bad spot again.

Jake glanced back over at you, and you couldn’t contain the smile that came when you nodded your head. He turned back around and Danny was already pressing their lips together. At first you felt out of place watching them share this intimate moment, their first kiss, but soon Danny was breaking away and asking you to come closer again.

Jake stood first, taking your hands and leading them to wrap your arms around his neck. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

You answered him with your own kiss, tasting the remnants of weed on his mouth and feeling your head spin like he was your high. Danny waited patiently for Jake to finish kissing you back before he joined from behind him.

With his added height, he was able to lean over Jake’s shoulder and reach your lips with his own, then after a few moments he used his finger underneath his chin to bring Jake’s face back and they connected again right in front of you.

Things were heating up quickly and you could feel the ache between your legs start to set in. “Boys, do we umm, want to take this party somewhere else?”

Danny, having been momentarily lost in kissing Jake, looked at you with glossed over eyes before quickly agreeing.

“I think we should find Josh and tell him we’re leaving first, so he knows we’re alright” Jake added.

“Right, I don’t need him interrupting later to check in on you” Danny brushed Jake’s hair over to the side and places a kiss on your hands before pulling away. “Not that you’ll be available to answer any phone calls”.

“Is that right?” Jake cocked an eyebrow, his hands still gripping into your hips like he never wanted to let go again.

Now that everyone was back on the same page again, your flirtatious side was coming out again so you joined in on the banter. “What do you have in store for us Danny?”

“Why don’t we hurry up and you can both find out for yourselves?”

The three of you found Josh in the dining room with a group that was lining up their next round of shots. He looked like he was still in full swing at the party, and standing right next to him was none other than Danny’s date.

“Josh, we’re leaving” Jake quickly announced to his brother, more than ready to get heading home.

“Wait! Already?” Josh complained, shot in hand and a pout on his face. He studied all of your faces, trying to determine without asking if whatever was wrong earlier had been resolved, but then he clocked Jake’s hand around your own. “Well, be safe getting home. Don’t wait up for me”.

“Wasn’t planning on it” Jake replied with a smirk and between him and Josh they both knew what that meant.

You started to follow him out the way you had come in earlier, from the back door in the kitchen, but you slowed Jake down when you noticed Danny was lingering behind.

“Will you be alright to get home?” He asked his date who looked like she had probably had one too many drinks since you left her downstairs.

“Yeah, I’ll make sure she’s safe” Josh put Danny to ease, just like Danny had for him outside.

“You’re leaving with her?” She asked Danny as she poured another shot straight into her plastic cup. “Why don’t you stay with me?”

“I’m leaving with both of them” Danny corrected, taking the cup to knock back the contents for her before tossing it into the trash can. “See you around sometime”.

He left her with the same shocked expression on her face as he had given her earlier when saying Jake was unavailable. It made sense now why he had shot her down so quickly, because Danny was willing to share you with him but no one else.

Even if you had two beers at the party, everything that had happened had sobered you up enough to drive back to the rental Jake and his brothers shared. The ride was quick, but the tension that built in the air between the three of you grew exponentially the closer you got to the destination. By the time the car was parked back in the driveway Jake was busting out of the back seat and hurrying over to the door to unlock it with his set of keys.

“You think Sam will be home soon?” You questioned when you and Danny joined him.

“If he is, then he will be in for a treat” Danny chuckled as he wrapped his hands around your waist and pressed your back to his front. With just the pair of tight jeans between the two of you, his excitement was already evident by the way his half erection pressed into your ass.

Jake got the door open and before you knew it he was pulling you from Danny’s hold and relieving you of your shirt as his lips crashed back into yours. Danny made sure the door was shut and locked back up before returning behind you and placing kisses all over your bare shoulders. His fingers found the clasp of your bra, then they pulled at your straps until the piece was slipping from your chest and joining your shirt on the floor.

Pressed between the two of them you felt your knees start to shake from arousal. You could feel both of them growing harder and you gained Jake’s attention by reaching down to cup him over his pants.

He moaned against your mouth and Danny hummed against your neck in approval. “You want to make Jake feel good first? I think we owe him that after earlier”.

You bit your lip as you started to unbutton Jake’s pants next, smiling at the way his face flushed when you started to pull them down past the swell of his ass. “Take these off Jakey” you requested and he obediently helped pull his legs free as you lowered yourself in front of him.

Jake was standing face to face with Danny now that you were on your knees between them, his blush only growing brighter as Danny removed his hat again and pulled his shirt off as well. His focus was quickly taken away though when you pulled the waistband of his boxers down and took him out with your hand.

“You want her mouth?” Danny asked as he watched you stroke him slowly from base to tip. Jake nodded his head, afraid to open his mouth and hear whatever lewd moans that would no doubt come spilling out.

“Tell her” Danny instructed, as he reached forward and grabbed Jake’s hand. He retrieved the black elastic Jake wore around his finger, usually for his own long strands when they became unruly enough to warrant being pulled into a bun, but Danny used it to gather your hair up from your face and tie it back in a low ponytail. “She’s waiting”.

“Fuck,” Jake panted, already growing frenzied from just Danny standing there watching you jerk him off. “I want your mouth” he admit, looking down right in time to see you smiling and giving him a kiss on the underside of his over sensitive head. He was unable to fight back the whine that did surface when you licked him next, all the way from his balls and up his shaft until you were wrapping your lips all the way around him.

Though this was the first time you had given Jake head, it wasn’t by any means your first rodeo, so you wasted no time pulling out all the stops trying to get a rise out of Jake as much as you were putting on a show for Danny.

“Damn, I didn’t know she was so good at that” Danny commented, his own hand palming himself through his jeans for a bit of relief.

“Me neither” Jake replied, his voice getting caught at the top of his throat when you took him all the way down yours and held him there.

Unable to stand by and watch any longer, Danny dropped down to his knees next to you and pulled on your pony tail until you were popping off Jake with tears starting to well in your eyes. Even with saliva still smeared across your face, Danny hungrily attacked your lips with his own, making sure Jake could see the way he tugged at your ponytail again to tilt your head back and slip his tongue inside.

Jake, though he admired the way you both kissed so passionately, interrupted by taking a hold of Danny by his chin and turning him towards his still wet cock. Danny opened his mouth without even the slightest hesitation and took Jake in, his eyes fluttering closed as he hollowed out his checks and sucked hard enough that Jake was tossing his head back and crying out.

You whimpered at the sight, feeling the way your panties soaked through and you squeezed your thighs together. Somehow Jake managed to register your tiny sounds, and he decided it was time to move to the bedroom before he got too lost in what was happening and you guys really did put on a show for Sam when he returned. So he tapped Danny’s shoulder and leaned down to help pick you up off the floor.

“How exactly are we going to do this?” You questioned with a giggle as the three of you stood each of you half dressed in front of Jake’s tiny bed.

“We’ll make it work” Danny answered and started to unbuckle his belt so he could rid himself of his own jeans. Jake followed suit by finally taking his shirt off, the both of them throwing their clothes somewhere in the corner of the room.

You had seen both of them shirtless plenty of times but it never ceased to amaze you how beautiful they both were, especially now as Danny ran his hand across Jake’s chest and they kissed again. Unfortunately it reminded you of your own toplessness, and you suddenly grew hyper aware of your body as you wrapped your arms around your chest.

“What’s the matter?” Danny asked, stepping away from Jake for a moment to come to your side.

“Nothing,” you shrugged your shoulders, but your hands gripped tightly into your upper arms, feeling the way they were squishy compared to his nicely toned upper body.

Jake instantly knew what you were thinking, he knew the way you struggled with body image issues in high school, and even still now though you had really grown out of it and learned to love the shape of your body no matter what anyone else said about it. “You’re so beautiful” he offered, hoping his reassurance would put your mind at ease.

“I know” you replied, giving him a soft smile in return. He had been so patient and endearing with you during your first time. When you were so scared to let him see you like this. It was definitely part of the reason your confidence blossomed into what it was today.

Danny had never seen you before though, and those old nerves were starting to resurface again. “I never knew you liked me like this” you said, looking up at Danny. “Never thought you found me attractive”.

Danny’s brows furrowed like he was offended you ever had that notion in the first place. “I have always thought you were attractive. You are a beautiful person on the inside and the outside”. He placed his hands on your shoulders, gently until he knew you were accepting of his touch and then he started to rub up and down your arms.

“Now,” his voice turned soft once more when you loosened your grip and let your arms fall to your sides again, “do you want to lay down on the bed so we can both prove to you just how sexy we think you are?”

You climbed onto the bed and sat in the middle, waiting for one or both of them to join you, but Danny already had something in mind. He walked back over to Jake, moving past him to pull the chair out from his desk and position it facing the bed. “Your turn to watch”.

With Jake sitting, Danny returned to you, easing you down onto your back as he hovered above you. “I’ve been thinking about this for so long, now that it’s actually happening I almost can’t believe it’s real”.

“I’ve thought about it too Danny” you reached around his shoulders, tangling your fingers in the thickness of his hair at the base of his neck.

“Tell me, what have you thought about?”

“About you touching me” you murmured, a sort of quiet calm falling over the room as you and Danny shared your moment.

He let his hands smooth up your thighs, giving them a squeeze and you a smirk “like this?”

“No, somewhere else”. Next he traveled up your hips, and you fought the flinch and recoil that came to you when his hands found their way across your stomach.

“Relax sweetheart” he cooed, making sure he was looking you in the eyes for any indication you truly wanted him to stop. “It’s just skin, soft and beautiful”.

You took his hands in yours and guided them further upwards until he was grabbing at your breasts. “Here” you breathed out, “touch me here”.

Having your chest fondled wasn’t usually on the top of your list of my favorite acts in the bedroom, but when Danny pinched your nipples between his fingers you let out a moan and arched your back. “Can I suck on them?” He asked, and you eagerly nodded. It was a combination of cold and warm, first the coolness of his wet tongue against the air as he licked over the hardened buds. Then warm when he pulled them into his mouth.

You moaned again, but the whimper you heard didn’t come from you. Looking to the side you saw Jake, still sitting patiently in his chair and stroking himself softly.

“Mmhmm, look over here” Danny popped off your breast to call your attention back. “It’s just me and you right now”.

You sighed contently as he went back to sucking on the other side, both of your nipples lathered up in spit and slightly aching from how hard they were.

Danny sat back up, his fingers playing with the button on your jeans. “Let’s take these off now”. You helped by lifting your hips, and he easily pulled them down your legs and off your body despite how hard they’d been to squeeze into before the party.

He leaned down again and placed a kiss on your lower tummy, then your hip. You could feel how wet you were already, and there was no way with his face so close to your center he couldn’t tell as well. “These too?” He framed his request into a question this time, his teeth nipping and pulling at the waistband of the thong you’d chosen to wear tonight. For the sake of no panty lines of course, not because you ever expected tonight would end with Danny using his teeth to peel them down.

You hooked your thumbs into the straps and quickly pulled them all the way down, Danny having to pull away again so you could get your legs free, then you were finally spread completely bare before him.

Danny settled between your thighs, urging you to bring your legs up and spread them wider so he could get a better look. “Fuck Jake, she’s perfect everywhere isn’t she?”

“I know” Jake answered, almost smugly as he’d had the pleasure of being in Danny’s exact position once before.

“So you two have had some fun already then?” Danny shook his head in faux disbelief, resolving himself that he wasn’t going to waste his chance to outdo the other man. So he dove in, his tongue finding every sensitive place you had to offer him and lapping at your juices until you were a shaking moaning mess. His tongue settled on your clit, slowing down a little to not overstimulate you so quickly as he positioned two fingers at your entrance.

“Danny, please” you bucked your hips into his face, searching for more.

Without having to ask again, Danny plunged his fingers deep inside you, increasing the pressure with his tongue in the same step, and within minutes you were spiraling towards your peak. Danny gripped your thigh with his free hand, and continued to pump his fingers in and out of you until your orgasm came washing over your entire body and you were drenching his mouth in your release. He re-emerged from between your legs with an amused smile, wiping his face clean with the back of his clean hand. “Have you ever squirt before?”

“No?” You giggled nervously, thinking maybe he was joking because of how aroused you were, but he was entirely serious. “I don’t know if I can”.

“Do you want to try?”

You sheepishly agreed, not knowing how this was going to go, but willing to try because you trusted him. Both of them.

“Jake, come over here” Danny stood from the bed and called him over. Jake jumped at the chance to get to him again, connection their lips again and tasting you on Danny. “Go, hold her, make her feel comfortable”.

Jake joined you on the bed, crawling around until he was behind you. Danny grabbed your hips and pulled you down until your ass was nearly hanging off the edge of the mattress and Jake let you use his legs as a pillow.

“You mind if we make a little mess?” Danny grinned as he got back between your legs from the floor, confident as ever he was going to absolutely rock your world.

“Fuck no” Jake answered him. “You ready sweetheart?” He had tucked himself back into his boxers, but you could still see the tent in the fabric when you turned to nuzzle your nose into the fold where his thigh met his hips. You tried to nip and mouth at his erection, but he placed a hand on your cheek. “Not yet, Danny’s gonna make you cum first then we can get back to that”.

“Relax for me” Danny, slid his fingers in again, and from this angle he was able to reach deep inside to the point you were arching your back again and reaching up to find somewhere on Jake to grip tightly. He held one hand, and the other grabbed a fist full of the back of his boxers.

Still recovering from your first high, it didn’t take Danny long to get you back to the edge with his mouth, but once you started to feel that tightening in your stomach, he pulled his mouth away and pressed down on your lower tummy as his fingers started to curl inside you.

“Oh my god!” You cried out, tightening your grips on Jake to the point you might’ve been hurting him, but your mind was too far gone to care.

“Right there beautiful, that’s it” Danny coaxed you closer to climax again. “Does it feel good?”

You were squirming, unable to control the way your body shook. “I feel too good” you whimpered, afraid you were reaching overstimulation now.

“Don’t fight it” Danny continued working his fingers, his thumb reaching around and pressing against your clit. That was all you needed to break, your second orgasm gushing from you without warning. He pulled his fingers out quickly and circled them around your clit again until you were clamping your things shut around his hand.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, okay!”

“I think she needs a little break” Jake told Danny, watching the way your chest rose and fell as you tried to catch your breath. “Don’t want to break her so early in the night”.

“I think you might be right” Danny agreed. He found a piece of stray clothing to clean his hands off with, and your legs a little bit, then helped pull you back upright. “You alright?” He asked, smoothing the hairs that had pulled free from your now messy ponytail.

“Mind if Jake and I play a little now?”

You nodded and gave him a kiss, whispering into his ear before pulling away. “Don’t go easy on him”.

“Wasn’t planning on it” he chuckled back, chasing your lips with his until you were scooting back on the bed and finding somewhere to rest for a moment.

Danny moved to take your place, sitting on the edge of the bed before pulling Jake into his lap. “Are you having a good time?” He asked as he peppered kisses across Jake’s chest.

“Hmm, I am” Jake replied, catching your eyes from behind Danny’s shoulder and giving you a warm smile. “Are you?”

“I’m surprised I’m still holding it together right now honestly. I never thought I’d really get to hold you like this”.

Danny nearly went back on his word when Jake started to grind his hips down into Danny’s lap, giving them both a little of the friction they craved. “I want you to do a lot more than just hold me Danny”.

“Oh?” Danny took hold of Jake’s hips and started to rut upwards to meet him halfway causing Jake to whimper again and sigh. “Tell me what you want then”.

Jake closed his eyes and pursed his lips as his grinding sped up. It wasn’t enough, but it felt good enough to keep chasing the sensation. At least until Danny abruptly stopped him. “Come on Jake, you’re going to tell me what you want or I’m going to go back to that gorgeous girl over there. She was so good for me”.

Jake opened his eyes again and he searched for you, finding you propped up against his pillows and watching intently. Though neither of you were new to being with each other, having Danny here, another man was, and he worried for a moment what you might think of him if he were to be absolutely honest.

“Don’t be shy now Jakey” you called to him, knowing exactly how he was feeling in this moment. “Tell him what you want. We’re both here for you”.

“I want you to fuck me Danny” Jake finally pleaded, before hiding his face in the crook of Danny’s neck.

He felt Danny’s chest rumble when he laughed, and Danny ran his hands up Jake’s spine to sooth him. “How’s that sound beautiful girl? You want to take turns fucking him?”

That was a rhetorical question, who wouldn’t want that? You let your hand come to rest between your legs now, your fingers running through your folds and gathering up the slick from your new found arousal.

Jake stood up tentatively, then moved over to his dresser where he opened the top drawer and retrieved a bottle of lube and a couple of condoms. When he turned around Danny had already rid himself of his last shred of clothing, and the two of you were both waiting for him to return.

The next few movements were a blur of kisses and soft touches, then before you knew if Danny had Jake fully naked as well and shamefully on his hands and knees in front of you.

“Jake’s such a good boy isn’t he?” Danny teased as he grabbed his ass and gave it a squeeze before spreading him apart and spitting on his hole. “Let’s see how far we can push him”.

Jake turned his face into the sheets to hide his groaning as Danny’s fingers circled his entrance, massaging the muscle and getting him used to the touch until he started to press the first one inside.

“That’s it Jakey, his fingers feel good don’t they?” You sweet talked him through it as you rubbed his back and played with his hair. You let Danny take his time stretching him for a while before moving to his side and kissing at his shoulders.

“Can I?” You asked as Danny’s patience was cut between you reaching around to palm at his length and Jake moaning for more. He pulled his fingers free and moved aside, allowing you room to reach Jake, but instead of replacing his fingers with yours you leaned over and slipped your tongue right inside him as far as it would go.

Jake yelped and tilted his hips back, not expecting to feel your mouth, but so thankful for it as you fucked your tongue in and out. While you had Jake distracted Danny took the opportunity to roll one of the condoms on and lather himself up with lube. Though he had yet to be touched very much, just a few strokes with the lube in his hand was all he needed to know he was going to have to take this very slowly if he was going to last longer than a few minutes.

“Why don’t you go lay underneath him?” Danny asked after tapping your shoulder. You wiped your mouth and followed suit, laying back down onto the pillows and letting Jake climb on top of you and take a familiar place between your legs. Jake was still nervous, but at least this way he was able to look into your eyes and find some peace there.

“I dream about this all the time” Jake whispered as he kissed at your neck, his tip already nudging against your bundle of nerves and making you clench around nothing, waiting for him to be inside you again. “No ones ever been more perfect than you”.

“Then what are you waiting for” you asked, rocking your hips in motion with him.

Jake got into position first, slipping inside with ease and pushing all the way in before he bottomed out and pausing to wait for Danny. He wasn’t far behind, using one hand to push on Jake’s shoulders and get him to lower himself a little more while the other lined himself up.

You watched as Jake’s eyes pinched shut, brows furrowed, and his jaw went slack for a moment, his body and mind trying to wrap around all the sensations of being buried inside you and penetrated all at once. “I think he’s good now” you let Danny know he was in the clear to start moving when Jake’s expression softened and he looked at you again with all the adoration in the world. Danny took his cue, slowly building a steady pace until he was snapping his hips into Jake and the force was causing him to push further into you.

His arms were starting to shake on either side of you, strained from holding himself steady in position so that no one slipped out of place. All you wanted was for him to be comfortable, the same way he had gone above and beyond to make sure you enjoyed your first time, so you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and pulled him down into a hug letting him rest his cheek against your chest.

Danny leaned forward with him, getting an even better angle so that now he was nudging right up against that spot inside Jake that made him inhale sharply and an uncontrollable moan forced its way out his throat.

“Ahhh fuck!” He cried out, wrapping his arms underneath yours and squeezing you tight. “I can’t, I’m gonna cum”.

“Me too” you chimed, no doubt your fluttering around him part of the reason he was so close. “Danny?”

“Yeah I’m right there. Who wants it? You or Jake?” He answered, his thrusts already slowing speed and growing sloppy.

“Come here, we can share” you replied and Danny quickly pulled himself from Jake before ripping off the condom. He had enough stamina left in him to make it upright with both feet on the floor, standing beside you on the bed and pumping himself towards his finish.

Jake sat back up and started thrusting in you again, chasing his own high until he watched as you took Danny in your hand and guided him to your mouth. All at once Danny and Jake were both filling you and your orgasm came wracking through your body at the feeling of warmth washing all over.

Just as you said, when Danny stepped away first, you sat up with Jake and pushed your lips to his, swapping Danny’s load back and forth a few times until it was pretty evenly distributed and you both swallowed with a dazed smile.

“You two are the hottest couple I’ve ever fucking met” Danny gasped out, wiping the bit of sweat that had accumulated on his chest with his thumb.

“The three of us are the hottest couple” you corrected him, beckoning him over to share a few more kisses before you all managed to puzzle yourselves together on the bed and blissfully fall asleep.

You woke up to a quiet sound. It wasn’t too early, but you were still tired enough to want to fall back asleep until you figured out what exactly it was you were hearing. When you opened your eyes, your back was against the wall and you were practically laying on top of Danny who was on his back but with his head turned away. Jake was on his side, curled up to Danny as well and they were kissing deeply, their tongues fighting for dominance over the other before Jake finally gave in and melted into submission.

“Someone’s awake” Danny paused their early make out session to announce your return to consciousness.

Jake reached over Danny’s chest and grabbed your hand, pulling you toward him until you were resituated between them, you front to Danny and your back to Jake. Danny captured your lips with his, kissing you just like he had Jake only seconds ago while Jake’s hands roamed all over your body.

“How do you feel?” Danny asked, clearly trying to gauge whether or not you were up for a round two so soon like they very clearly were.

“Never been better” you smiled, your voice catching when Jake’s hand snaked between your thighs to see if you were wet. Of course you were, you’d woken up naked in bed with not one, but both of them. Last night felt like a dream, but the dull ache in your core when Jake delved his fingers in reminded you that it was very much real.

“Jake was just telling me about how good you feel” Danny smiled as he watched your face contort into that of pure pleasure when he added his fingers to the mix, circling them around your clit. “Want to feel you so bad”.

“You want me to keep going?” Jake asked as he pumped his fingers in and out of you, “or do you want Danny to fill you up?”

Your head was spinning from all the possibilities of how this could play out, but when it came down to it, only one thing truly mattered to you. “I want you both. Please”.

“That’s a good girl” Danny kissed your forehead and pulled your leg up around his hip just as Jake retreated his hand only to move around to your backside. He used your slick to press his finger inside, then another until you were moaning and clawing at Danny’s shoulders.

Danny reached between your bodies and guided himself through your folds, and then Jake was there too spitting into his palm for a little extra lubrication so he could ease himself behind. Once Jake was finally situated, Danny thrust in and you cried out from how good it felt to be so full and connected with both of them.

They both started to move and all you could do was just lay there and take it, let them both use you to reach their own finish as you were sure your climax was already budding deep in your stomach.

The room was filled with the sounds of your combined moans and thrusting until everyone came to a halt at the sound of a door slamming shut from across the hallway. Sam, or Josh if he’d somehow made it home instead of sleeping at the fraternity house.

“Please don’t start fucking again!” Sam hollered grumpily. You guessed he had gotten back sometime last night, but in the heat of everything no one had noticed.

“He will get over it” Danny shrugged and you couldn’t help but giggle at how absurd it was, but also you didn’t want to stop right now either.

As quietly as you could, the three of you finished what you were in the middle of. Well they finished with you in the middle, crashing into your orgasm with blinding force.

“I need a shower, desperately” you announced after pulling yourself free from the tangle of limbs. “And to brush my teeth”.

“Your toothbrush is still in the bathroom” Jake replied, sitting up and examining the mess that really was made between last night and this morning. “You go ahead and we will clean up a bit”.

After your shower, you left the bathroom feeling like a new woman, wearing one of Danny’s many shirts that he’d left over here and a pair of Jake’s boxers. Your mouth minty fresh with Jake’s toothpaste.

Jake and Danny still needed to shower, so you left the bedroom to find something to eat in the kitchen, but as you rounded the corner from the hallway to the living room you nearly ran into Sam.

“Oh hey Sam!” You tried to sound excited to see him, and you usually were, though you were thoroughly embarrassed it was under these circumstances. “I’m sorry about last night”.

“It’s alright” he sighed, “I’m just glad Danny will finally shut up about being obsessed with you two”.

“He told you?” You asked, but it wasn’t really that surprising considering how close they were. Then you thought for a moment, sure you were in Danny’s shirt but you were in Jake’s room. How did Sam add that up so quickly? “Wait, how did you know Danny was with us?”

Sam’s eyes shifted over to the floor of the living room where a pile of mixed clothes had been forgotten. “Those are Jake’s pants, that’s Danny’s hat and shirt, I’m assuming that’s your shirt”.

Your face lit up in even more embarrassment. So Sam had known since the second he got home what exactly was going on.

“Next time give me a warning okay? I’ll go crash with Josh or something” he pat you on the shoulder and continued back down the hallway to his own bedroom where you heard the door shut gently closed behind him this time.

You gathered up the clothes and tossed them into Jake’s room before heading back to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee while waiting for the others to finish getting cleaned up. Danny joined you first, pressing up against you from behind and stealing a bite of the toast you had just made.

“God I’m starving. Please tell me they have something other than just bread”.

“There’s some eggs in the fridge I can fry” you giggled, pushing your ass back up against him as he grinned down at you devilishly. “So Sam knows”.

“He was going to find out sooner or later, better it be now” Danny didn’t seem to care much at all as he turned to open the fridge and you bent down to shuffle through their cabinets for a pan and some cooking oil.

“You know, he mentioned something about you being obsessed with us”.

“I may or may not have drunkenly confessed to him one night about how badly I liked you guys”. Danny set the eggs down on the counter with a shrug. “Now, are you going to tell me why you and Jake insisted with everyone that you weren’t together?”

You thought about it for a moment, the simple truth being that the both of you had it in your minds you were just friends, so you stuck to it. “We were just trying to give each other some space to figure out if that was really what we wanted. Though we spend most of our time together, we were missing that extra something to spark that fire. I think you are that spark”.

“Is that eggs?” Jake finally joined the two of you in the kitchen, having taken some extra time to strip his sheets and start a load of laundry.

As soon as Jake was within snatching range Danny grabbed him by the waist and pulled him into a kiss that had you smiling fondly at them when Jake relaxed into it.

“What’s that for?” Jake sheepishly asked, though he wrapped his arms around Danny too.

“Nothing, just some spark” Danny grinned back at you and you shook your head and continued getting some breakfast made for your hungry boys.

Fin.

Tags: @kultavalo @sanguinebats @gracev0609 @lipstickitty @writingcold @musicislove3389 @fleetingjake @milojames16

[littlemissmentallyunstable]

Can u write an enemies to lovers fic of Grayson X reader??? Plsss!!

thank you for your request and I apologise for the delay in writing it, my request list has been mountainous for a little while now and this particular fic actually also had lots of rewrites before the final piece. It began as an academic rivals sort of thing, then became family-feud but finally ended with whatever this is. I’m praying you enjoy this 🤍🤍

title: we’re just project partners

pairing: grayson hawthorne x (first person) reader

synopsis: you’re partnered with the one person you hate to complete a project you love… but what if he’s not as bad as you thought

warnings: swearing, gray-bae is being a nasty little b-word (BUT ITS FOR THE PLOT OKAY)

a/n: I am alive!! It’s just taken me a week and a bit to post again, I’m writing three fics at once so this one just happened to be done first

taglist: @lovethornes @whatsamongus @wish-i-were-heather @inmyheaddd @never-enough-novels @fleuriosa @midiosaamor @sweetreveriee @emelia07 @f4iry-bell @zaraaaabear @thoughtdaughter3 @benny1989fredd @elysianwayy77 @maybxlle @sheisntyou @anintellectualintellectual @aleatorio1234 @adalia-jaycee @off-to-the-r4ces @lyra-kane @reminiscentreader @lyrakanefanatic @imaseabear @elizaa31 @loveinalocket

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I roll my eyes, eyeing the names on the board.

It just has to be him doesn’t it.

“There must be a mistake,” Grayson says. I turn my head to look at him, for once we can agree on something.

“No there is no mistake,” the professor tusks, “class dismissed.”

Everyone gets up and begins to pack their stuff, chatting about the project and their partners and various other things. It sucks when you have no classes with your friends, but it sucks even more when you get partnered with your rival for a project.

I’m about to walk out of the classroom when I hear my name.

“Y/n l/n, come back a moment!”

I stop myself from rolling my eyes, I just want to go home. I spin around and sluggishly walk back to the teacher’s desk where she stands and beside her is the infamous arrogant prat Grayson Hawthorne.

“You have to change it,” Grayson snaps quickly, his voice so insistent, so sharp. I look up to see he’s gesturing to our names beside one another’s. Classic Hawthorne. Thinks he can command people to do whatever he pleases just because he feels entitled enough to do so.

“What you gonna do, bribe her if she says no?” I scoff, arms folded.

They both ignore me but my lip still quirk upwards, proud of the pathetic joke I’d made, even if I was the only one who found it funny.

“There will be no changes Mr Hawthorne,” our professor replies sincerely.

“You don’t understand,” he shakes his head so vigorously I have to bite back a laugh, “I can’t work with her.”

“Well you’re going to have to,” she says, “this is 30% of your grade for the year.”

His eyes widen and he almost looks panicked. Almost. Nevertheless it amuses me to see the stoic, ironclad blonde crack for mere seconds.

“Professor please,” he says so desperately he’s practically begging, which I’d always thought was too beneath him to do, “she’s impossible.”

“I’m impossible?” I raise my eyebrows.

He rolls his eyes and turns back to our teacher, “anyone but her. I’ll do it by myself if I have to.”

“I’ve told you once and I will only repeat myself one more time, there will be no changes made,” she says too calmly, “I don’t see the problem, you are both excellent students with some of the highest marks I’ve seen in my time. You need to get past whatever this little tiff is and move on. Bounce off of each other, enlighten each other, create a show stopping presentation.”

Such a teacher answer to give. Played off to be inspirational, really just a nice way of saying get on with it or you fail.

“On the contrary Miss, I think Hawthorne here is the only one kicking up a fuss, I haven’t uttered a word,” I point out.

“That may be true but don’t you think I can see the vicious looks aimed at both him and me?” she asks, accusation in her tone.

So maybe the dirty looks weren’t as sly as I’d thought them to be. Still, it wasn’t like he didn’t deserve them.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I lie through my teeth, sweetened smile to sugarcoat it further.

“Perhaps it should be discussed in a detention then, I’m free after school tomorrow,” she proposes, her smile even sweeter than mine.

“No, no, that isn’t necessary,” I say quickly, “I’m suddenly horribly aware of the looks I’ve been giving.”

I’m not the kind of girl who gets detentions, actually I’d never gotten one in my life and I didn’t intend to change that. My record was perfect, it was going to stay perfect. My professor, annoyingly, knew that a bit too well.

“Good, I suppose no detention then,” she says, “and what about you Mr Hawthorne, would you like to discuss your stubborn means to switch partners in a detention with me?”

“No thank you,” he grits through his teeth, his jaw nearly set in stone. I fight back a grin at his irritation.

“Challenges are good for the mind,” she smiles, “and I have a feeling you two will very much challenge one another. You once told me you liked a challenge, no?”

“I do,” Grayson nods slowly, then side glances at me, “but not of this kind.”

I think it was meant to be an insult towards me but it was so poor it didn’t even come close to mildly hurting me so I don’t bother to respond.

“Try something new, branch out a little,” our professor shrugs, “and who knows, you may even enjoy each other’s company.”

“That is very optimistic,” I scoff at the same time as Grayson says, “that will never happen.”

“Only time will tell,” she replies with a whimsical look in her eyes, “good luck.”

We exit the classroom in the coldest of silences. Any colder and we would’ve had an ice palace with an interesting rendition of ‘let it go’. I vote Grayson plays Elsa.

He actually barely spares me a glance, with his jaw all clenched and tightened. I wonder at one point if he’s breathing. He’s so tense, the feeling smothers the air around me, suffocating any sense of relaxation. I turn to leave the building.

“Where are we going?” he questions, too assertive for my liking.

“I’m going home,” I tell him bluntly.

He furrows his brows, “why?”

“To get changed,” I deadpan.

“Why?” he repeats. I try to read his emotions but they’re not clear enough to define. He’s accustomed to hiding them.

I stare at him, “I don’t need to explain myself to you.”

“Fine, we’ll meet here in 15 minutes,” he decides.

I don’t reply as I turn on my heels and walk away.

***

After getting changed and piecing together all of the things I might need to study, all my notes and books and highlighters and pens, I walked back over to our ‘meeting place’. As I approach Grayson is already stood there with a sour expression on his face. Of course he’s already there.

“You’re late,” he tells me, his voice so bitter I wonder how many lemons it would take to rival it.

“No I’m exactly on time,” I sneer, flicking my phone in his face.

“It’s been 15 minutes and 43 seconds, so technically you’re 43 seconds late,” he smirks. I almost feel sorry for him because I can see how proud he feels after saying this, sense the smugness burning in his chest.

“Did you count?” I try extremely hard to suppress my laughter.

“Of course not, I wouldn’t waste my breath on that,” he rolls his eyes, then pauses slightly, “… I set a timer.”

“Of course you did,” I purse my lips with a sigh.

His screws his face up, “what’s that supposed to mean?”

“It’s supposed to mean you’re a weird person who would time someone going home to get changed,” I shrug, attempting to walk past him.

Talk about being late, when he was the one stood here chattering on about meaningless subjects. He ignores the comment and briskly stands in front of me to block me from walking any further.

“What are you wearing anyway?” he asks, looking down on me with great distaste with all but his eyes.

“Clothes,” I deadpan, staring down at my much loved and slightly over worn band tee-shirt.

“They’re awful,” he tells me bluntly.

“Was that meant to hurt me?” I raise an eyebrow. I mean sure, it hurt a little, but I didn’t actually care what he thought. Or I shouldn’t at least.

“You could’ve picked something a little nicer to wear in public,” he continues, so cut-throat and cold.

I look directly into his mellowed silver eyes and wonder how someone with such soft, inviting eyes could be so sharp and jagged with the words he uses.

“Worried I’ll ruin your street credit,” I tease, “sully your good name with my sports leggings and band t-shirt?”

“I’m just surprised at your lack of care for your appearance,” he replies, a slight discomfort worming its way through his features. It makes me smile a little.

“I just think I’m not as fixated on it as you, I mean what’s with your outfit, James Bond? Do you own anything that’s not a suit and tie,” I ask.

“Matter-o-factly I do,” he replies bluntly as if to end the conversation.

So of course I continue it, “so do you just stare at those clothes then, hanging in your walk in wardrobe.”

His eyes snap up and his stare is suddenly so piercing it hurts to hold eye contact, “how do you know I have a walk in wardrobe,” he practically spits, in a defensive tongue.

I snort, “that was a joke, but yeesh rich boy you’ve got it all.”

“Rich boy, how original,” Grayson comments.

“I’ve got more,” I shoot back with that smile I know makes his blood boil and skin singe.

“Spare me them,” he responds, “sweetheart.”

A forbidden fluttering occurs in the pit of my stomach, it’s as if eight hundred butterflies have decided to dance a jive there. Some feeling between guilt and shame settles in my chest. The word sweetheart shouldn’t make me feel anything, least of all from the mouth of Grayson Hawthorne.

But it was the way he said it, so softly, so smoothly, the word just rolled off of his tongue like he’d called me it for years. It almost sounded nice. The guilt weighs heavier on my chest and I snap out of it. I don’t feel anything. For anyone. Least of all him.

“Awww you’ve got a nickname for me too Goldilocks,” I reply with a laugh to bury the truth.

“Did you not hear the spare me part?” he tusks, beginning to walk.

I shake my head, walking a little faster than usual to keep up with his strides, “sorry I usually don’t listen when someone irrelevant talks.”

He scowls at me and I wink back.

“Did your face get stuck in a permanent scowl as a child or were you just born unhappy?” I cock my head to the side and narrow my eyes.

“Do you ever shut up?” Grayson asks flatly.

“My therapist told me not to hold back,” I shrug.

“Doesn’t that explain a lot,” he says dryly, shooting me a look that makes me feel inferior. I go to bite my tongue, but ask myself when I’m trying to hold back. I don’t owe him anything.

I stare at him, “don’t look so disgusted blondie, just because you’re too up yourself to admit you need help doesn’t mean all of us are.”

“I don’t need help,” Grayson replies, each word candid and dull.

Something in me almost feels sorry for him. Did he really think he didn’t need help? Did he really feel that alone and isolated? I wanted, in that moment, to reach out and be there for him. Then I remember who he is.

“Whatever you say,” I sigh.

“We’re working at my house,” he responds abruptly, as we get to the end of the street.

I fold my arms and raise my eyebrows, “says who?”

“Me,” he shrugs.

“And who are you to tell me where I’m working?” I ask.

“I’m your partner and I’m making a decision,” he presses on, stubbornly. Little does he know, I’m twice as stubborn and I’m not going to back down.

“I don’t think you really understand how this whole project thing works,” I say.

“I’ve done plenty of projects and I can very much assure you, I understand what I’m doing,” he grumbles back, clearly annoyed that he isn’t getting his way this time. Someone has to teach him I suppose.

“Oh great,” I smile sickeningly sweetly, “then we’re not working at yours.”

“Why on earth not?” he screws up his face as if I’ve just told him I want to skin a cat alive.

“I don’t want to,” I reply simply.

“Well I do,” he argues back.

“That’s a shame,” I shrug softly, leaving him with no option.

He shakes his head and runs a hand through his perfect hair, “you are insufferable.”

“That the worst you got Hawthorne?” I giggle a little, turning left to walk down the pathway.

“And impossible,” he says, following me.

“Oh you wound me,” I say hyperbolically, putting I hand in my head and feigning a dizzy spell.

Grayson rolls his eyes, he’s done it so many times now I’m worried they might get stick here soon, “can we just work?”

“Where?” I shoot him a lopsided grin.

He sighs, most likely suppressing some very colourful language, “why don’t you decide seen as my ideas oppose you.”

“Much like your entire personality,” I let him know.

“My personality is fine,” he replies, probably trying to soothe his rapidly declining pride under that suit of his.

“Mhmmm,” I nod sarcastically, “and I have a unicorn that shits cupcakes called Craig.”

“Really?” he wrinkles his nose, “profanities?”

“Oh no is it too beneath the great Grayson Hawthorne to say fuck every now and then,” I laugh.

He tenses and mutters something under his breath. I don’t quite hear the words but you can see he’s fuming. It ignites something in me, a spark. I like seeing him furious. I really like it.

“Where do you want to work?” he asks me, grey eyes a little too distracting for my liking.

“The library,” I tell him, my answer almost immediate.

He tries to mask his horror but fails miserably, “in public?”

“You’re not going to get cholera,” I snort.

“Can’t we just work somewhere nicer,” he complains.

“The library is nice,” I tell him, “and they have a coffee stand outside and I want coffee so that’s where we’re going.”

“And you call me demanding,” he mutters underneath us breath.

***

We walk to the library bickering about how fast he walks and how slow I apparently walk. In my personal opinion I think he was walking fast on purpose, he obviously disagreed.

“Do you even know where you’re going?” I ask him, it now only just dawning on me that he was leading the way yet he didn’t know where the library was.

“I’m not an idiot,” Grayson spits back, nose in the air, posture upright and powerful.

He always carries himself like that as if he’s saviour of the world and we should all bow down to kiss his presumably pedicured feet.

“Are you sure?” I tease him.

“Certain,” he snaps regimentally.

“We’re here,” I say halting conversation to walk up to the coffee stand.

“I knew that,” he mumbled.

He glances at the cart, looking it up and down like it needs to be judged and inspected to his high standards.

“What is this?” he interrogates me.

“It’s called a coffee cart in english but in rich boy it might be called something else, I haven’t studied the language yet,” I respond coolly.

“Is this even safe to drink?” Grayson says, some variant of worry wavering in his tone.

“It’s coffee,” I deadpan, “not raw chicken.”

He rolls his eyes in an exaggerated manner.

“I like it and I’m getting some,” I tell him bluntly, “you don’t want to, you don’t have to.”

“No,” he checks his watch, “I need a coffee, this’ll have to do.”

I don’t bother wasting my breath to respond but make a mental note that maybe the Hawthorne wasn’t so different from me, addicted to coffee.

“Hey Jack,” I wave, walking closer to the cart.

I’d known Jack for a good eight years of my life, he was my rock. The smile in endless clouds of grey, the light at the end of the tunnel and of course, most importantly, the coffee provider to my caffeine deprived being.

“Bonsoir sunshine what can I get you,” he grins his usual grin at me, the witty mischief-ridden grin is known since I was nine years old. His eyes slide over Grayson judgementally though when he realises I’m watching him he immediately flicks back to his job.

“The usual of course,” he makes sure.

“You come here often?” Grayson raises an eyebrow, interrupting my answer.

“Just every day,” Jack says, before I can get a word out. I shoot him a look.

Grayson looks at me, “every day?”

“I really like coffee,” I explain with an exaggerated hand gesture.

“Coffee is bad for your health,” he responds almost immediately.

I suppress the hundreds of colourful words exploding in my mind settling for a more well-mannered reply, “well it’s good for my mental stability.”

“She’s addicted now,” Jack adds, “she’ll get withdrawal symptoms without it.”

“Shaking, sweating, you name it, I get it,” I continue.

“That sounds like a serious health condition,” Grayson says, his eyebrows pinching together. It was so soft I could’ve mistakened the expression for concern. But of course, why would he be concerned for me. I must’ve been reading it wrong.

“Hence me buying this coffee,” I tell him.

“Blueberry muffin, on the house,” Jack offers me, as if he didn’t every Friday.

We had a deal, I was allowed to take a free blueberry muffin that came out of his earnings if he kept up to date with his school work. Jack had always had a problem with handing things in on time and concentrating and school wasn’t his strong point. He hated going and was so close to dropping out too many times. That was until I made him stay. I talked him into it and he promises me he doesn’t regret it. It seems this week, he’s turned in all assignments on time.

I smiled, “you mean on the cart?”

“Sure whatever,” he brushes it off, “anything else?”

His eyes dare to skim over Grayson again though he is quick to come back and meet my gaze, his cheeks flush like he’s a child who’s done something wrong.

I turn to Grayson, “what do you want?”

“I’ll pay for myself,” he says shortly, looking slightly offended at my question.

I screw up my nose at him, “I wasn’t going to offer to pay for you asshole.”

“Play nice, sunshine,” Jack teases.

I glare at him and his smile quickly fades.

“You can’t play nice with that,” I glower.

He shoots me a look, the turns to Grayson, “what can I get you sir?”

“It’s not the evening,” Grayson replies.

Jack’s eyes are lost in a blanket of confusion, “sorry?”

“It’s not the evening it’s the afternoon,” he clarifies, as if it made the meaning of his sentence any clearer.

“You’ve lost me sir,” he shakes his head with furrowed brows.

“You said bonsoir but it isn’t the evening,” he chastises, “it’s afternoon and therefore you should’ve said bon après-midi.”

Jack turns to me, bewildered, “is he on drugs?”

“Probably,” I shrug. I wouldn’t be surprised if the rich kid had private access to that sort of stuff, he probably had the lawyers to cover it up as well.

“Are you…” Jack hesitates, “…you know?”

He makes an odd gesture with two fingers as I confuse to stare at him blankly.

“No I don’t know,” I reply.

“Are you with him,” he asks, “romantically.”

I almost choke on my own spit as I bark out a laugh, “oh god no.”

For a fraction of a second a look of relief passes over Jack’s features. Something uninvited tugs at my insides but I quickly ignore it.

“You’d be lucky,” Grayson scoffs.

“Oh he fancies himself,” Jack grins, clearly amused.

“Yeah it’s an ego thing, his is massive,” I explain.

“No it’s not,” the blonde insists.

“In denial as well,” Jack smirks, folding his arms.

“Always,” I say, then turn to Grayson, “now what do you want to drink because if you don’t tell him now I’m taking mine and ditching you.”

“Black coffee, no cream, no sugar,” the answer was instant, rehearsed.

“Ooo you made a hardcore friend,” Jack snickers, I want to slap him.

“We are not friends,” I make clear.

“Yeesh okay,” he raises his eyebrows, lifting his hands up as if he’d been convicted of a crime.

“And let’s be realistic here, rich boy probably has a massive sweet tooth and is too embarrassed to let people know,” I say with a sly smirk.

“Oh one hundred percent!” Jack nods, handing me my cup and muffin.

“I do not,” Grayson mutters, but loudly enough for us both to hear.

“That’s confirmed then,” Jack winks at me.

I giggle as he hands Grayson his drink. We exchange payment and then comes the dreaded point where I actually have to leave to get work done. Usually coming to the library for me was getting to see Jack and getting my coffee, not the actual going to library part.

“See you tomorrow,” I smiled sadly.

“Hopefully without thunder face here,” Jack says.

“I can hear you,” Grayson says curtly, before taking a sip of his coffee.

“I know,” Jack shrugs.

“I hope so too,” I reply to his previous comment, “bye!”

“Bye,” he salutes me as I turn around and begin to walk.

I’m aware that Grayson is by my side but neither of us speak. The only sounds come from our surroundings and the alternating elongated sips of coffee were taking to avoid talking. I practically inhale my muffin, after skipping lunch as school had booked my time table that way.

“I didn’t like the way he looked at you,” Grayson says suddenly with a sour expression on his face.

“The way he looked at me was none of your business,” I reply sharply, indicating for him to drop the subject unless me wanted a fight.

“Well I didn’t like it,” he continued. Fine, he wants a fight.

“I don’t really care,” I shrug, “he’s Jack, he’s been a friend since freaking kindergarten, he’s got no dishonourable intentions.”

A slight exaggerated lie on my part, but I wasn’t ashamed. It feels like I’ve known Jack that long anyway, the technicalities don’t matter.

“You don’t know that,” he states.

“I know that better than anyone now back off okay?” I snap, “or you and I will have a real problem.”

He laughs, “you’re almost adorable when you’re angry.”

“Adorable?” I say, fantasising spitting in his face after that comment.

“Almost,” he corrects me.

“I can throw a good hard punch and I’m not afraid to,” I warn him.

“Oh I’m sure you’re not,” he says, a ghost of a smile twitching on his lips, “I can see as much in your eyes.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I ask, raising my voice a little.

He stays quiet and averts his eyes, deciding to ignore me a continue walking.

“Oh ignore the question, real mature,” I roll my eyes, “so glad I’m having a proper adult conversation.”

Silence hits again, like a sonic boom of nothingness. He doesn’t even look at me. It’s as if I don’t exist, as if in the last three seconds I’ve become an irrelevant invisible being.

I stop Grayson in his tracks and force him to meet my eyes, “stay away from Jack,” I practically growl, “or I’ll fail this assignment on purpose.”

“We both know you wouldn’t damage your perfectionist reputation for petty revenge,” he murmurs, our faces only inches away from one another’s.

“I have a talent for getting myself out of things,” I cock my head to the side in an art of competition, my cheeks flushing at the realisation that I could feel his warm breath on my face.

“How funny,” he counters, “me too.”

His eyes are narrowed to challenge me. Okay Hawthorne, game on.

***

We’ve been researching for an hour with no further conversation. Since our previous altercation neither one of us had so much as looked up from our laptops. The only reason I knew he was still sat opposite me was the sound of his keyboard typing. I get out my textbook and begin to highlight the lines I need to use

“Why are you using six different highlighters?”

The first thing he says to me in an hour is that? I don’t bother looking up.

“Why do you care?” I ask, my eyes flicking over to my work, my hands continuing to highlight information.

“It’s annoying me,” he shrugs.

“Okay,” I reply slowly, “it sounds like more of a you problem to me.”

I look up. Grayson is staring right at me, his steel eyes cold looking on my face. He opens his mouth to reply but my surprise gets there first.

“You wear glasses?” I gape.

“Seen as I’ve had them on for the last hour that would make sense,” he teases.

“I never see you wear them at school,” I explain.

“That’s because I don’t,” he pauses, “why were you looking at me in school?”

“It was just generally, like I’d waste my time looking at you,” I roll my eyes.

Then catch his for a moment. My head tilts to the side. Something feels off about him. He looks warmer, softer, calmer.

“What?” he asks, clearly annoyed.

“You look weird,” I blurt out before my brain can filter it.

“How lovely of you to say,” he replies dryly.

“You don’t look like you,” I say, “you look more…”

Human. That’s what I want to say but I trail off instead.

“More what?” he prompts.

“It doesn’t matter,” I shake my head, getting back to my book. I can feel his eyes on me.

He stares me down quizzically, like he’s trying to work me out, “I know what you’re trying to do.”

“Highlight my textbook in peace? Yeah,” I scoff, “but that’s not really happening anymore.”

“You’re trying to get under my skin,” he seethes.

“By highlighting my book?” I raise my eyebrows.

“In six different colours,” he reminds me, as if I don’t already know.

I sigh, “I dare say that coffee made you even more of a bitch.”

He rolls his eyes, “you really feel the need to use those words?”

“No but I feel the need to punch you,” I retort.

“Well I’m right here, why don’t you?” he challenges.

“Because I have a level of self control,” I shrug gently.

“Are you quite sure?” he asks me.

He doesn’t realise I’m not the kind of girl to question myself just because a man did first. I’m not that kind of girl at all.

“Are you quite finished?” I reply, just a smoothly to mirror him.

“No.”

Our eyes linger on each others and it feels like we share a million unspoken conversation through the patterns of our irises. I’m fixated on him like I’ve been fixated on no other before. It’s not me but that doesn’t make me pull away. His gaze becomes more concentrated, harder to ignore without unwelcome feelings arising so I look back down to my highlighters and pick up for where I left off, except now I had a thumping heart in my chest.

I slide a sweaty palm on my trousers keeping it hidden under the table. I finish up my highlighting and then begin type up the final few notes I have to get done. After that, it’s over. I get to leave, I get my freedom, I get to breathe.

“I’m finished,” he announces when I’m mid sentence. Why is his tone always so articulated, so definitive?

“Okay I’m nearly there,” I say, frantically typing the last of my notes.

“Bit slow,” he comments.

I roll my eyes with no energy to reply. He’s done me in today. I’m exhausted at the thought of more bickering. With a few more clicks of my keyboard I complete all that I wanted to.

“I’m done,” I exhale, “just send me your work so I can proofread and check the facts.”

“You doubt my skill?” he raises an eyebrow.

I shrug, “I don’t know you well enough to trust it.”

“Then send me yours,” he purses his lips, “and I’ll do the same.”

“Okay then,” I say, sending him over my copy slowly.

He opens it and begins to read as I open his. My eyes are just in the middle of the second paragraph when there’s an untimely interrupted.

“It’s a waste of time,” he says suddenly, irritation thick in his tone.

“Not if I find mistakes,” I sing song, not taking my eyes off of his page, knowing full well I’d have to reread this sentence and other four times.

“You won’t,” he snaps.

“Oh take it out!” I exclaim finally, growing too exasperated to keep my feelings at bay.

He grows suddenly extremely confused, providing a perfect answer, “what?”

“The stick, wedged up your backside!” I whisper-yell, exasperated, “just yank it out already.”

“Excuse me!” he widens his eyes, looking highly disgusted.

“You’re rigid as a board, you never smile, your muscles are literally tensed, chill out a little,” I breathe, “I literally just want to check over the notes, why is it nearly world war three?”

“Your imagination is quite something,” he comments, practically ignoring all that I’d just said.

“So is your expressionless face,” I answer with a small shrug.

Grayson’s lips twist into a smile, “you think my face is quite something?”

“Don’t flatter yourself Hawthorne,” I scoff, rolling my eyes.

“I’ll try not to,” he replies.

“It must be hard for you,” I tease.

“Not as hard it is for you to admit you like my face,” he continues to smirk, annoying twinging through me with each curve of his mouth.

“If liking it means I want to spit in it, then yeah I really like your face,” I reply.

He leans over the table, getting closer, “you’re revolting.”

“Get the dictionary out for the next adjective,” I taunt him, “there’s one behind you.”

He doesn’t respond and I take that as my win. His eyes just become fixated on my notes all of a sudden. My stomach dances a little. I feel nervous, why do I feel nervous? It’s just Grayson, reading my notes… but my leg is bouncing up and down and I’m holding my breath without realising it. The clock has never ticked so loudly.

I focus on his notes and unfortunately realise he’s right. There are no mistakes. How annoying. I wanted to make him feel stupid for being so arrogant but he had a right to be. His work was practically perfect. Of course there are things I would’ve written differently but it didn’t taken away from the fact that his work was masterful.

“There’s a mistake,” he says suddenly.

Damn it.

“What?” I ask.

“In your work,” he smiles, almost proudly.

“Okay?” I say, “that’s why we proof things, hence proving my earlier point of the important of proofreading.”

“You got the date wrong,” he explains.

“Which one?” I furrow my brows, dates were the first thing I checked usually. It wasn’t like me to make mistakes on them unless I was distracted.

“1922 should be 1923,” he counters, showing me on his screen.

“Must’ve been a typo,” I shrug.

“Or poor research,” he replied smugly.

“Well I’ve written down 1923,” I tap my pen on my paper notes, “so it must have been a typo,”

“Well you should proofread more carefully then?” he says.

“Maybe I should’ve,” I nod.

He’s got nothing left to say. He can’t argue with me if I’ve agreed with him. Silence hit us like the dead. You could cut the tension with a knife.

“Just correct it,” I finally breathe.

“I will,” he says, tapping at the keys.

“Done?” I ask once he’s finished.

“Done,” he consolidates.

“Great so now we can leave,” I say, standing up, a little too eager to get out.

“Not yet,” Grayson tells me, his words slow and staccato.

“What is this? Some sort of damnation? I want to go home,” I exclaim.

“Well we need to seal our work with our fingerprints,” he explains.

I stare at him blankly, it feels like he’s just said something to me in a strange foreign language, “what?”

“Put fingerprint recognition onto the data base so only we can open our work,” he clarifies, as if it makes it any easier for me to understand.

“Why?” I ask cluelessly.

“So no one can hack into it,” he replies.

“Why do you say it likes it’s obvious?” I say.

“Because it is obvious,” he shrugs.

“Only you would have a fingerprint recognition for school assignments,” I roll my eyes.

“Well I want them secure,” he says.

“Clearly,” I snort.

He opens his mouth to reply but I interrupt him before he can get there.

“Let’s just get this over with, I want to go home tonight,” I sigh.

“Fine,” he says, “you just have to tap here.”

I place my finger where he directed it but it didn’t work. Huffing, I jab my finger at the screen a few times harshly. I’m surprised I don’t break the screen.

“I said tap, not murder,” Grayson says.

“I’m imagining it’s your face,” I growl back, still tapping relentlessly at the uncooperative piece of technology.

“It’s cute you think you’d even get close to touching my face,” he replies cooly.

I smack his forehead sharply. His reflexes aren’t fast enough to register it until the act is done. He sits there, stunned and blinking.

“Still cute?” I ask, batting my eyelashes.

“Adorable,” he growls, a sarcastic venom dripping from every letter.

I groan, as the fingerprint fails me again, “it’s not working.”

“You’re doing it wrong,” he tusks.

“Come on then genius,” I roll my eyes, “show me how it’s done.”

I’m surprised when he takes my hand gently and guides it to the screen. That familiar jolt in my stomach returns. He’s so delicate with me, as if I’m worthy of being treated fragile. He applies light pressure to the tip of my thumb so the fingerprint recognition goes through, his eyes fixated on the screen. Mine are on him.

“There, that’s how it’s done,” he says, snapping me out of my thoughts. The screen lit up green.

He let go of my hand and a wave of shame rolls over me because I’m disappointed he let go.

“Good then,” I nod, mentally telling myself to stop thinking such nonsense, “I need to get home.”

“It’s 6pm,” he deadpans.

“And I need to get home,” I repeat, remembering what an aggravating human being he could be. It washed away any tentative hand touch in an instant.

“But the assignment-“

“We have three weeks,” I say, “don’t get your kickers in a twist Barbie 2.0.”

“The names keep getting better,” he grits through his teeth.

“Well practice makes perfect,” I tease, enjoying myself a little too much

“Doesn’t it just,” he smiles sarcastically.

I sigh shaking my head, “why did she have to pair me with you?”

“I don’t know why you’re complaining, you got the better end of the bargain,” he says with a laboured laugh.

I pause and stare at him, “how?”

“You were partnered with me,” he states, “I’m coherent, cohesive, co-“

“Too many co words Mr,” I cut in.

“But I got you,” he says.

“You say it as if I’m a piece of shit on your shoe,” I practically spit at him. I hate the way me makes me feel inferior.

“Well you’re not exactly pleasant to be around,” Grayson defends, leaning back in his chair.

“Ditto.”

“You’re annoying, irritating-“

“They’re literally synonyms of each other,” I yell over him, earning myself a stern look from the librarian.

“I mean you’re clearly very argumentative,” he says, gesturing his hands as if I were proving his point, “but I wouldn’t put it past you, after all I’m presuming your background didn’t give you lessons in etiquette.”

I clench my jaw to keep it from dropping. I knew he was nasty but I didn’t know he could be cruel.

“My background?” I question him. I know what he means, I just want to see if he’s brave enough this stick his neck out and explain it

“You’re a scholarship student,” he shrugs.

“How do you know that,” I ask quickly.

No one is meant to know that. The headmaster assured me no one could possibly find out and yet Grayson Hawthorne knew. How funny. He only shrugs in response, he wasn’t going to let up that information. He could see it meant something to me.

“I know you think you’re king of the world and all that but it wouldn’t kill you to take your head out of your ass every once in a while and breath some fresh air,” I raise my voice a little, wildly furious.

“Must you be so creative with your insults,”he asks dryly

“Must you be so blatantly rude with yours,” I shoot back.

“So it’s not true?” he replies.

“You don’t have the right to judge me on what you think you know about my life,” I snap fiercely.

He raises his eyebrows, “sorry, did I hit a nerve?”

“You hit nothing,” I mutter.

He smiles to himself, he knows he hit something.

“I’ll be leaving now then, see you later,” I say, the annoyance too thick in my tone for me to hide. I stand up and grab my bag.

“Wait!” he calls.

I spin around, “what?”

“I need your number,” he says slowly.

“You don’t need to sound so desperate,” I smirk.

“I need it to text you the times to meet up and work on the assignment,” he clarifies with an infamous eye roll.

“You don’t need to use that as an excuse blondie,“ I say.

“How can someone some on so intelligent be so utterly exasperating,” Grayson groans.

My cheeks heat up. He thinks I’m intelligent. He values my mind.

“It’s a talent,” I grinned back.

He rolls his eyes as I write down my number and hand it to him.

“There.”

“Thank you,” he nods at me.

“Wow,” my eye widen in shock, “you can be civil!”

“Every once in a while,” he shrugs delicately.

I almost smile but suppress it. Quickly I stack all of the books I’d borrowed to out them away on my way out. Though as I go to carry the pile his voice stops me.

“You’re never going to able to carry all of those books,” he says.

“You don’t need to underestimate me Hawthorne, you’ve done that too much today,” I tell him.

“Watch me defy your so called fact then,” I retort, lifting all eight volumes on top of one another into my arms.

“I’m not underestimating you,” Grayson replies, “I’m stating a fact.”

It’s heavier than I’d estimated which is the first shock. They sit unstably, wobbling and threatening to come cluttering to the floor. But he could not be right. I wouldn’t buckle. I wouldn’t drop anything. I’m not a failure.

“Need some help there?” he tilts his head to the side.

“No,” I say, my strained voice giving me away.

“You look like you’re struggling,” he comments.

“Well I’m not,” I reply, feeling that my face is rosy from sheer effort.

He looks at me, “are you sure?”

“Very,” I grunt, my arms burning with the weight.

“I’ll save you the stubborn act and the library damage fee and take some,” he rolls his eyes.

“I said I’m fine-“

He takes a large sum of books from the top. My arms relax slightly as I glare at him.

“If you drop them you’ll like an idiot,” he explains.

“I wouldn’t have dropped them,” I state.

“Okay, whatever you say,” he replies.

“Don’t use my saying on me,” I say.

“It’s not yours,” he shrugs, “you didn’t create it.”

“I used it earlier, that’s close enough,” I tell him.

“Sure.”

We come to an abrupt halt in conversation and both turn back to back to put the books back to their respected areas. I see one in my pile that has a page marked. I flick to it and pause to skim over the contents.

“What are you reading?”

He almost makes me jump, I didn’t hear him sneak up behind me.

“An article,” I say, tying to keep my voice from trembling after the shock.

I can feel him now breathing down my neck, his chest almost touches my back. My pulse races, skyrocketing a little too far.

“Who’s it by?“ he asks.

My eyes flick to the bottom of the page where I read aloud my response, “am anonymous writer.”

He scrunches his nose up, “what good an article with an anonymous author?”

“It’s not about who wrote it, it’s about the impact it has,” I say.

“I disagree, if I wrote a life changing article I’d want people to know I’d written it,” he replies.

“Of course you want more,” I scoff, stacking the books a little too aggressively.

Classic Hawthorne. The second I think he might not be so bad he goes ahead and reminds me of exactly why I hate people like him.

“Want more?” he furrows his brows.

“You want the glory of it, your name talked about, your legacy preserved,” I snap.

“So I can’t want anything?” he shoots back with venom on his tongue.

“You’re a rich, stuck up prick, like all the rest of them at that school,” I laugh bitterly, “your grandfather is a billionaire, what could you possibly want that isn’t already at your fingertips?”

“You don’t have the right to judge me on what you think you know about my life,” he quotes me.

“Bite me Hawthorne,” I snarl, spinning around.

He catches my wrist and the corners of his mouth lift to form a smirk. A twinge of hatred shifts in my stomach as I glare at him.

“Any other requests?” he raises an eyebrow.

“Don’t play that game with me,” I say, my voice low and dangerous.

“And what game might that be?” he asks, our faces inching closer by the second. The butterflies madly gnawing on my internal organs.

“You know what you’re doing,” I mutter, as my fingers clasp around his wrist too.

His smiles broadens and his silver eyes ignite, “and what is it that I am doing?”

“Stop,” I snap at him. We’re so close now that our foreheads could touch with the slightest of movements.

“Stop what?” he questions me, his voice so hushed it send a shiver down my spine.

“I’m going to strangle you,” I growl, the sound coming from the back of my throat. An uninvited passion rippling through my tone.

“I’d like to see you try,” he murmurs, snaking a hand around my waist. A soft gasp escapes my lips at the warmth and tenderness of his touch. He holds me like I’m breakable. It makes me vulnerable and I hate it yet I don’t tell him to stop. I come to horrible realisation that maybe I don’t want him to.

“I swear to god Hawthorne-“

“Shhhhh,” he says, eyes pinned to mine.

“What are you doing?” I ask breathlessly. All the oxygen previously in my lungs had been sucked out mercilessly by his tentative being.

“Just shut up for one second,” he snaps.

Fury lights inside of me and the spark of rage burns brighter than ever, “don’t tell me to shut-“

“Shhhhh,” he murmurs, placing a gentle finger to my lips.

My mouth obeys without my brain’s consent and my voice ceases. It’s just him and I and the silence around us. My heart thumps in my chest, so loudly it rattles through my ears. Slowly, almost cautiously, my own hands slide up his back as if some other world force is tugging them that way. I know I don’t want to do this but a familiar aching for deprived feeling was forcing me to.

“What are we doing Grayson?” I say, the words barely heard.

“I don’t know,” he whispers, “all I know is, you drive me insane.”

“Funny,” I smile softly, “you drive me insane too.”

His pupils dilate as we get closer. An entrancing monochrome kaleidoscope, only black and grey. Our foreheads meet, pressing into one another. It feels so natural, so right. His hands tighten slightly around the small of my back, as my eyelash graze his cheek, tickling him lightly. I can feel his breath on my face and his heart beating against my own. Our lips go to meet and-

“We’re closing the library now.”

I jerk backwards to suddenly my back smacks into the shelves of books behind me. Pain surges through my spinal cord and I bite my lip to keep me from crying out. My eyes become glossy as previously stacked books thump to the floor. I look up to see the librarian standing there.

I cough, picking up the books, “thanks, we were just leaving.”

She raises a brow but doesn’t say another word. I feel my cheeks burn a feverish red. I don’t meet Grayson’s eyes as I spin on my heels and charge out.

thanks for reading my loves 🤍🤍

TIG masterlist

[snghnlvr]

𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠. / sim jaeyun

sim jaeyun x fem reader!

read part two here <3

synopsis : who knew there was something behind your relationship with the infamous smart guy at school? you had questions as to why jake likes you and chose you to be his girlfriend out of all people. soon, you found out the truth: by a bet.

includes : 1.5k | cursing (internally) | again with the one sided relationship sigh | i’m a SUCKER for angst so.. | jake is a loser and i would end myself if this happened irl | y/n you’re too nice :((

extra: olivia rodrigo is my mom , if i was y/n i would’ve slapped the shit out of jake but let’s not get too physical here eh?? :] , i haven’t seen much jake angst (because he’s the most loving human ever??? he would NEVER ever do something like this) so here i am… :D

likes, comments, and reposts are very much appreciated <3

[below the cut]

“thanks for making me get $100, babe”

you look up from your seat to see your boyfriend, jake holding a $100 bill between his index and middle fingers. he sent you a wink which already made you blush like crazy but then you slowly processed the words.

what?

“what?” your expression dropped. you looked at jake, waiting for a response for what he meant.

“i said,” he planted his two hands in front of his desk, staring down at you with his beautiful eyes of his. you stared back with nothing but confusion in your eyes.

“thanks for letting me have $100 sweet cheeks.” jake’s lips curved up. he slowly leaned towards your cheeks, pecking them before proudly looking down at his cash.

that little nickname he gave you made your hearts do back flips as usual.

you stood still before replying, “what do you mean? you used me?”

you’ve liked jake ever since he was in the school’s soccer team since sophomore year. he’s popular for his smartness, his godly visuals, his amazing personality of his that steals the hearts of girls, and his talents.

your introverted personality of yours didn’t dare to make a move on jake. you were undoubtedly shy and didn’t like social interaction very much. all of the girls were in line to ask him out and directly confess their love to him, but you didn’t. you weren’t in line, you were just observing him from the side, mentally noting what he likes, didn’t like, what topics he likes to talk about and many more.

the only proof that you like him was through a little post it note you had on your desk before leaving to go to cafeteria.

sim jaeyun <3

was all you’ve written in pink in your yellow post it note. you haven’t told anyone, even your closest friend for you would be afraid of the public teasing that would soon eventually let the whole school know you like jake.

five months, he suddenly asked you out because he thought you were the “most beautiful girl i had ever laid eyes on but was scared to make a move”, quoted by sim jake himself.

at first you didn’t question it as to why he randomly asked you out.

you remember that day, you were blushing like crazy, heart almost ripping out of your rib cage, and you had all sorts of scenarios and activities both you and jake can do because both of you are in a relationship.

well, were in a relationship.

“yeah.” your thoughts were interrupted when jake responded with a heartless tone. “i admit that you were cute when you bought me gifts, but either than that,

i’ve never liked you.” his tone was monotonous.

is that why i reminded him of my birthday? is that why i reminded him of our monthsavrie? when my classes end? is that why i was the first to everything? good morning texts?

thinking about your past memories where you felt the most happy with jake,

was all just an act. just for the damn $100 dollars.

jake being the first one to hold your hand whenever both of you met, even if it’s a minute in the hallways or meeting after school ended, him being the first to notice you shivering and toss you his hoodie even if he was cold, him volunteering to help you study your subjects even if it’s 2am, him wiping your lips with his soft fingers from eating ice cream, him listening to your rants and sobs whenever your parents fight late at night, and always looking at you with nothing but love and admiration you believed,

all an act?

you lowered your head, trying to contain your proper breathing and trying not let your tears fall down. you exhaled, closing your eyes.

“who asked you?”

jake’s face slightly clenched when seeing your eyes filled with rage yet tears threatening to spill out. “who asked you for the bet?” you asked once again but with a firm tone. you didn’t break eye contact. you were thinking of his friends he always hung out with, park sunghoon, yang jungwon, lee heeseung, and many more but you felt like these people - your best friends as well - would never hurt you like that.

instead of being sad and running away, you’re staring at your ex boyfriend with bitterness. the loving stare you’ve had towards jake was rather replaced as if he’s your enemy. yeah, you’ve been backstabbed.

“does it matter?” jake tilted his head, shrugging it off. “what matters is i got my money.” he flicked his bill right in front of your face, his tongue peaking when he mockingly smiled at you.

you glanced at the dollar and then back at jake.

“did i mean nothing to you?” you asked, your thoughts suddenly spilling from your lips. “was our relationship nothing to you?” a tear spilled out of your eyes. seconds later, multiple of them were easily sliding down your cheeks.

you stood up from your seat, looking directly into jake’s emotionless eyes. “did you have fun playing with my feelings? did you enjoy taking my likeness towards you as an advantage? were your friends having fun hyping us up whenever we were around them? did you at least have some fucking sympathy for me!?”

after screaming, you looked down. you were going crazy. literally.

“god, y/n calm down. you’re embarrassing me, lower your volume.” jake crinkled his nose, eyes wandering around to see if there was anyone near the both of you.

despite not looking at him, you can hear the annoyance in his tone and the rolling of his eyes whenever you guys argue. he would call you “overdramatic.”

“fine.” you gulped before looking at him. you imagined yourself as a crying mess. it’s like every argument you had, jake would not cry, but you were.

you had to contain yourself to not let your emotions overwhelm you, but it’s hard right now.

you just got used for money.

“i hope that $100 dollar bill reminds you how much of a shitty person you are.” you grabbed your book bag and ran for your life.

out of that suffocating room.

i can’t believe it, you thought.

he’s a bitch he’s a bitch why is he a bitch!? why did he choose me!? why did he hurt me? i did nothing but .. love him and be there for him.. what did i do to get treated like this??

your chest hurts like shit, you can’t breathe, you can’t think properly, all you wanna do is to hide forever and never face jake the following monday at school. you wanted to go anywhere. anywhere but be in a room with him, sim jaeyun.

god, love is fucking embarrassing as hell.

-

YEAHHH jake angst drabble🕺 idk how to feel this one as i can’t imagine jake doing such a thing :(( but we need a change don’t we ? i hope you enjoyed it!! thank you for reading!! ❣️

[diremoone]

better | gojo satoru.

a cute short story in honor of my nephew being born on Mother’s Day, here’s a snippet of something cute (but it’s published a few days after Mother’s Day lol). Also, feels like I haven’t written in 100 years and I’m constantly rusty so I’m sorry if this is bad lol.

w — UNSEALED! Gojo, fluff, adult/minor relationship, former! teacher/student relationship, post-canon, takes place about seven years after the Culling Games and JJK storyline, Reader is 23/24

Satoru’s newborn son felt like a feather in his arms.

He’d never tell anyone (Shoko might would) that he was absolutely terrified when he was first given his son — his firstborn — to hold after coming out of you. You, of course, got to have skin-to-skin contact with Seiji first. (To which Satoru managed to snap a few pictures.) But when you were done holding him, it was time for him to hold his child. And he was downright terrified.

At the time, every bad thought entered his mind.

What if he didn’t hold him right? What if he squeezed his son too tightly? What if, God absolutely forbid, he dropped him?

No. No, that wasn’t going to happen. He was the strongest jujutsu sorcerer alive, for crying out loud. Why wouldn’t he be able to hold his newborn child?

Satoru was surprisingly glad his overconfidence kicked in, because holding his son felt like a dream come true.

A few months have passed since the first day he’s held Seiji — since his son has been born. And nowadays, he’s absolutely certain he wants at least ten more.

Well, five at the least. Considering he’s not the one carrying the babies and doing all the hard work and labor; of course, he was going to ask you first.

But he’s so lost in his thoughts that he doesn’t even notice your presence. Not even his Six Eyes or inhuman-trained senses seem to acknowledge you’re in the room with him. Not until your voice gently cuts through the air.

“Satoru,” you say, “you should be in bed.”

“I’m good,” he reassures you, eyes not leaving the sleeping boy in his arms. “I’m good. I’m fine. I’m just watching him.”

“You’ve been watching him for nearly half a day. You need rest.”

“I don’t need to sleep,” he tries to argue in a soft voice. “I have the Limitless. I don’t have to have sleep.”

“But Seiji would want his father to sleep.”

And of course, your words strike him exactly where they needed to be struck. And you continue to talk, driving that nail that needed to be struck even deeper.

“You don’t have to shoulder everything anymore. Not like you used to,” you murmur. “There’s more First and Special Grade sorcerers a than there have been in a long time, myself included.”

Satoru had bragging rights against his clan. (Well, rights to say that his wife was extremely dangerous and would be the first to come and annihilate them if they did anything to Seiji.)

You had been the one to annihilate the Elders during the time of the Culling Game, and they stood absolutely no match against you when it had happened. He recalls Maki saying that she’d never seen her kouhai — or anyone really — that angry.

So, Satoru was more than happy to make the Gojo Clan understand you were just as equally of a threat as he was if anything happened or they tried something to your son.

“I just don’t want to miss anything. Not a single thing. Not even him wiggling his eyebrows in his sleep,” Satoru admits, the last part making him smile. “And if that means using my powers to stay awake all the time, I’m fine with it.”

For a man that’s been so closed-off with his emotions for well over a decade, you’re so glad to see and hear Satoru being this open. Vulnerability has never been his strong suit, but over the last few years, he’s been allowing himself to be more vocal.

The only problem for the rest of the world is that he’s only that open with you — his wife. And his son, of course.

You obviously have no problem with that.

Seiji coos, garnering his parents attention. He squirms in his father’s arms, stretching his legs.

“Oh, hey buddy,” Satoru whispers happily. “You’re awake!”

You love the big, excited grin that stretches across your husband’s face as the baby moves. The light of fatherly love in his eyes makes your heart soar and tears form in your eyes.

You remember when Satoru was terrified about becoming a dad. You remember the times where he feared becoming his own father. The man wasn’t like the usual physically abusive father you’d seen in a stereotypical show or movie. He was, technically speaking, but it was with sorcerer training. And even though Satoru didn’t show it or tell anyone, you knew bits of his younger years haunted him.

There had been long and deep discussions about his past and how he’d handle those things if they ever came up. There were also lots and lots of reassurances on your part, telling him that he’s already nothing like his own father.

Satoru would burn the world for his little family, and that was something you both already knew — something his father would never do.

”I think he’s hungry,” you comment softly.

“Want me to get the milk from the ready?”

“Please.”

Satoru hands Seiji to you like he’s made of glass. And somehow the bottle is done within a few minutes. Seiji just chugs away at the bottle, downing it faster than you’ve seen him since he’s been born.

Satoru gives a low whistle and chuckles. “Damn. He’s hungry.”

“And he’s eaten recently, too,” you add.

Silence, save for the sound of Seiji drinking from the bottle, takes over the room. But it’s not the bad, deafening kind. It’s the kind that’s focused, beautiful even. And if anyone were to step into the room of your family of three, they’d understand why.

“Thank you, [Name].”

His voice is full of love. When you look up from Seiji and into Satoru’s eyes, you see that it’s there too: the unconditional love for you and the sweet infant in your arms.

“For what?” The question comes out, but you’re sure you already know the answer.

But the second you ask, Satoru lifts you into his lap and you squeak. You knew he had always been this strong, but goodness. The amount is strength and ease he used to lift you made blood rush to your cheeks.

A sweet kiss on the cheek. “For being there with me.”

A sweet kiss on the other cheek. “For staying by my side.”

A long, loving kiss on your forehead that made you close your eyes. “For marrying me and being my wife. For giving birth to Seiji,” he mutters against your crown. “But most of all: for loving me. For loving me as I am, and for helping me become better. Better for you, for Seiji, and for myself. For helping me be a good dad for our son.”

Hot tears line your eyes from Satoru’s declaration of devotion and passion. You had no idea this was what you’d wake up from your sleep to. If you had known, you certainly would have prepared your heart just a little more.

“Oh, Satoru.”

You wrapped your free arm around his shoulder to try hug him. He helps, pulling you as close to him as possible, careful to not squish the cute sleeping baby between you.

“I love you, too. I love you so much, Satoru. We’ll always drive one another to be the best versions of ourselves. I’m your wife, and I’ll always be here. I have no intention of leaving your side. Ever.”

You share a slow Eskimo kiss, but Satoru’s lips mischievously steal a kiss anyway and it makes you giggle.

He glances down at Seiji, and then grins a grin that you means he’s gonna say something you’re going to smack him for.

“We make some really cute kids, don’t we? Wanna have ten more?”

Okay, no smacking. Sending him through several concrete walls should definitely suffice.

taglist:

@torusbabygoat

[ edited 12/20/23 | dividers belong to @/saradika-graphics ]

[azdoine]

stolen planets

this is a minor point of order, mostly unrelated to the stuff about the River that I'm trying to get to later, but it's an idea I've never seen anyone post about in their consideration of John's empire and agenda.

early on in AYU, while dwelling on her miserable slog through convalescence, Judith mentions overhearing an inscrutable bit of BOE slang:

The stomach pouch was removed on a previous excursion to what they said was an abandoned “steal planet.” I understand that they use the word “steal” for what we would term “shepherd.”

I say slang because why else would you use the present tense verb in place of a past-tense adjective here, if not as colloquialism? however, this slang appears nowhere in NTN, where we spend great chunks of time airing out BOE vernacular.

Reading between the lines a bit, we can easily guess what the BOE troops meant by "steal", because they spend the rest of the short story trying to get Judith connected to one:

The ship was a Gorgon-class vehicle... it was the last time they had tried to design a light craft that still had room for a stele. Blood of Eden must have captured or stolen one intact.

However, this is still an unusual way of speaking; we've never exactly heard of a "stele planet" before, and we know BOE had to get their stele from Mercymorn, as opposed to finding one in the corpse of a flipped planet.

Looking for 'plot holes' and errors in the continuity of a magic system is rarely productive, but if we comb back over HTN, AYU, and NTN, there appear to be some interesting inconsistencies in the presentation of stelae.

In HTN, John describes stele travel as vaguely dependent on obelisk infrastructure, forcing his Lyctors (who can travel freely) to lay down more of them - the reader is encouraged to that stelae are warp drives, and that obelisks define the regions a stele can transit between.

God said, “We came up with the stele instead, and the obelisk, which are less to do with travel than they are to do with transmission. But there will be times in your future when you will have to move unfettered by needing an obelisk, and even times yet to come when you will fulfil the sacred Lyctoral duty of setting obelisks...”

“Where we are going there are no obelisks for a stele to hook on to,” said the Emperor.

Certain asides in AYU and NTN double down on this interpretation, making references to "obelisk anchors", and establishing the need to locate an anchor at one's intended destination before embarking on stele travel:

Someone else said more clearly, How will we know where the anchor is? And the voice said, I’ve given you the blasted co-ordinates, haven’t I? It won’t be in the ship’s stellar registry, so you’ll have to do the input work yourself. And you must follow the route I’ve given you afterward.

“The Ziz isn’t Cohort standard. And it’s not as big on the inside as you think. Look at the windows—see how there’re none on the back end? It’s mostly engine. Not plated either. It’ll get to sublume without many problems … but it definitely doesn’t have room for a stele. Camilla is right. It can’t travel by obelisk anchor.”

However, AYU makes it clear that a stele also has a role to play as an anchor:

Under this duress I told them I understood how the stele worked but had no ability to use it myself... I said one necromancer alone would not be able to use it as an anchor and that it needed to be energised on a thanergenic planet, so it would never be of any use to them.

NTN even seems to flip-flop around, with people locating a stele to anchor onto, and using obelisks like an array of engines rather than to define one end in a point-to-point transition.

"The Warden convinced the Oversight Body, convinced the Sixth House to come with us. We showed them the secret of the installation. We helped them find a stele that would anchor such a big thanergy transition … which means, we helped them move."

"How’d you get it through a stele? With the weight of that thing, you’d never survive River displacement.” “Five hundred and thirty-two obelisks,” said Camilla.

Here's my tinfoil hat for you: if a stele and an obelisk both have similar roles to play in FTL travel - as suggested by their both being named after words for monuments - then the obelisk should have a similar necromantic nature. They may both be similar names for the same thing, or two different versions of the same thing, at least.

If nothing else, given that they're clearly both "anchors" rooted in Fifth House spirit magic, obelisks and stelae must have similar demands for upkeep and maintenance. And how can a Lyctor possibly set up such an obelisk out in space?

We know that each anchor relies on great quantities of freshly oxygenated and thanergy-enriched blood - that is, each anchor is sustained by a thanergenic fluid still flush with thalergy, per Pyrrha's comments to the effect that blood wards are more thalergy-rich than bone wards. Such anchors also have to be charged with power from thanergy-rich planets.

Mercymorn was able to produce an automatic oxygenation unit via the use of flesh magic, but blood cells need external organs to stay alive. For purposes of sustaining a very large anchor with life and death, a simpler option might be to make your runes with very wide chisel cuts or specially treated surfaces, so that they can't be blotted out by debris, and then leave them in a liquid ecosystem. Place them at the bottom of a water basin teeming with microorganisms, and then allow the micro-ecology to start dying off in the same thanergenic background radiation that you're using to charge up the anchor monument.

For example, by carving into the seabed under the salt-water ocean of a dying planet - a stele planet.

[normspellsman]

A Kiss, Perhaps

pairing: spider socorro x fem!human!reader

genre: fluff

word count: 4.4k+ (😳)

warning(s): just spider + reader being cute idiots in love, spider actually being a lovesick puppy that happily follows you wherever you go, subtle brains x brawn dynamic, the tiniest hint of suggestive content (?), first kiss trope, slightest mention of making out, & getting caught (oop-)

taglist: @aonungsmate @universal-s1ut @thatonegirlwiththebeanie367 @optimisticblazetrash @arminsgfloll @amortencjja @dearstell @liyahsocorro @chshshhshshshshshshs @goodiesinthecloset21 @sweetirilly @blushhpeachh @iwannahaveaprettyaesthetic

word bank: ikran — winged creatures used for flying + hunting

note: set before the events of atwow! i keep overdoing myself with these 4k+ fics 😭 but anything for you guys <3 there’s nearly not enough spider fics on this app. give my boy some love T-T! also, tumblr’s being weird & not letting me tag some people on the posts so i’ll try to tag those with a line through their user in the comments.

You loved spending time outside in the forests of Pandora, soaking in everything you saw. You spent more time out of the lab than in it most days.

Spider even joined you at times, trailing behind you like a lost puppy. You probably knew the forest better than the boy, even with his frequent associations with the Sully children. You practically never left the beautiful scenery and spent too many hours exploring every little thing you could. So, he found it best to follow your lead whenever he tagged along on your journeys.

Norm liked to say that you were a lot like Grace Augustine in some ways. Always wanting to analyze and study every single plant you came into contact with. Always too caught up in admiring the beauty and wonder that Pandora provided. Of course you never met the woman but you saw plenty of her video recordings with Kiri and on your alone time. You could say that the two of you had similarities but none that were too significant.

You knew almost every inch of forestry on the moon-planet. Almost.

There was this one place that Spider had stumbled upon many years ago after running around with Lo’ak. It was his little hideout spot whenever he needed time to himself or wanted a break from things. He didn’t think about sharing it with anyone else until you mentioned how bored you were one night, complaining about how you practically seen every inch of the forest and that there was nothing else to see. You loved everything you saw on Pandora but missed the first time admiration one held whenever they saw something they had never seen before.

Spider wasn’t exactly sure if you had already scoped out his little getaway spot but nonetheless, he still wanted to share it with you.

“I don’t think you’ve been to this place though,” Spider speaks up one day, pulling your attention away from whatever you were studying underneath the microscope.

The teen also often offered his company to you whenever you were in the lab doing whatever scientists did. He liked spending time with you, even if you were too caught up in doing sciencey stuff that he had absolutely no clue about.

“What do you mean?” You asked, eyebrows furrowed together in confusion.

A shit eating grin stretched itself onto Spider’s lips. Good, he thought, she doesn’t know what I’m talking about.

“You said that you’ve seen every inch of the forest,” he replied, twirling a pipette in between his calloused fingers, “but, I’m sure you haven’t seen my hideout.”.

Curiosity sparkled in your eyes, back straightening in attention.

“What does it look like?” You asked, genuinely excited about the secret place Spider had kept from you for whoever knows how long.

Spider had you right where he wanted you. Like a prey in his web. There was no way that he was going to give you any details of what it looked like. Where’s the fun in that? He wanted to see the pure, genuine look of amazement on your face when you finally saw the place he was talking about.

“Nuh uh,” Spider tsked, poking your cheek with the pipette, “I am not falling for that. You’ll just have to wait and see tomorrow,” he finished, face inching closer to yours.

Your eyes rolled in annoyance, not pleased with Spider's answer. You at least wanted to know where the spot was or what some of its features looked like, it would help that anxious-excitement feeling that always crawled its way into your stomach whenever you discovered something new.

“Wherever you’re taking me better not be somewhere where I have to climb,” you retorted, slightly pushing back his head with your hand, him snorting in response.

“It’s not that bad. Besides,” he replies, “I can always carry you up there.”.

Spider was ridiculously strong for a human boy his age. The first time you realized it, your stomach twisted in knots. The two of you were play fighting in your early teens when the male managed to pin you down with just one arm, the other slithering in between your bodies as he tickled your stomach. It was in that brief moment that you realized how different and quickly Spider was changing, thanks to puberty.

Just the thought of Spider carrying you up to wherever he had in mind without even breaking a sweat made butterflies erupt in your stomach. You began to wonder how his toned arms would feel around your body or how his tense back would feel against your front as it flexed due to his climbing. (Your mouth began to water a little at the thought. Oh how you wished he would just pull you into his embrace and hold you so you could feel the flexing of his muscles as he did so.)

You quickly scoffed the thought away, shaking your head at the dirty blondes' response. He very obviously took pride in his strength and the fact that he could most definitely carry you anywhere without much difficulty.

“Sure you could, Spider,” you added, your eyes squinting a little at the boy in front of you, unplugging and turning off the microscope you were using.

Spider smirked at your response, tossing the pipette to the side as he saw that you were getting ready to clean up, signaling that you were done for the day and we’re going to head off to bed.

“Night, beautiful,” Spider whispered, ruffling your hair a bit before he turned and left the lab you were occupying.

“G’night,” you replied, pink dusting your cheeks in reaction to the nickname he gave you early on into your friendship.

He always called you that. Max had explained to him what the word meant when he overheard Jake call Neytiri that when he was only a child, wondering what it meant. Max told him that he should only ever mean it whenever he called someone it. So he did. You were the only one he called beautiful and probably would be the only one he ever called that and truly meant it.

“Tomorrow, three hours before eclipse,” Spider quickly added, heading peaking through the door of the lab, a smile on his face as he voiced the time he planned on taking you out.

You only hummed out in acknowledgment, shooing him away as you focused on your task of cleaning up your area of the lab.

You really couldn’t wait for tomorrow.

———

“Hurry up, you’re going to make us late,” Spider whined out, sprawled out on your freshly made bed, a ball of yarn in his hands as he tossed it up and down towards the ceiling.

You rolled your eyes at the boy, annoyed at his words. It wasn’t like there was someone else waiting for you at the spot he wanted to take you to.

“We are fine, Spider,” you scoffed out, finishing tying up your shoelaces together besides the teens head as your body was in a seated position. Your hand briefly reached out towards Spider’s knotted locs, messing with them a little before he turned his head to teasingly nip at you, teeth not making contact with your skin. You squealed in response, hurriedly pulling back your hand in order to avoid the boy's sharp teeth.

Spider barked out a laugh at your response, tossing the ball of yarn to the side, softly landing on the floor with a dull thud. Another thing he loved, messing with you. He took great joy in doing it and seeing your reaction.

“Yeah well, the faster you finish getting ready, the faster we’ll be at my spot,” he retorted, pushing himself up to a sitting position, a bored look on his face as he looked at you.

Spider had only been in your room for around fifteen minutes, barging in when you just finished braiding your hair yelling about how long you were taking and how by the time you were done, it’d be sunrise already. He was all ready to go and had been waiting for you for almost thirty minutes before coming into your room unannounced. He usually did, which caused you to throw whatever was closest to you at him, demanding him to get out. You got used to it over the years but still, you needed privacy and sometimes, you felt like you rarely had that around Spider due to his spontaneous barging into your room. You gained the ability to change out of and into your clothes incredibly fast, almost always narrowly missing flashing Spider.

“Okay, okay, I’m all ready,” you responded, hands going up in surrender as you stood up from your spot on the bed, dusting off the back of your thighs and the front of your shorts.

Spider groaned out in relief, hopping off the bed and grabbing your packed bag that was placed by the doorframe, throwing it over his shoulder before grabbing your hand and rushing you out in excitement.

“You’re gonna love it, I swear!”.

———

The both of you had arrived and climbed up to the place Spider had wanted to take you to in an hour and a half. The sun was just at eclipse when you arrived. Spider didn’t hesitate to crouch down a little so you could jump onto his back, legs and arms tightly around his neck and waist before he began the ascent up.

“We’re here,” Spider whispered, slightly out of breath from the exercise. He tapped your thigh twice, signaling that it was safe for you to let go.

The first thing you saw were vines. Lots of them. It covered almost every inch of solid rock, clinging across the surface until your eyes landed on a small opening, the vines dangling over it as the twine and its leaves cloaked the opening. No wonder you never knew of this place. Regardless of it being too high up for you alone to climb, it was very well hidden by the green vines.

It seemed like it was a cave, from what you could see. Peeking past some of the small openings in between the vines, you couldn’t see much light through the gaps. It seemed to be pretty dark and the only light that was getting through was the sunlight that managed to squeeze between the vines.

“You excited?” Spider asked, anxiety settling itself in his stomach. He wanted you to like his secret spot. It was special to him. He didn’t even tell Lo’ak about it and he tells the Na’vi boy practically everything.

“Very,” you replied back, eyes still glued on the intricate weaving of the vines. You tried to imagine what was behind the plant's structure, excitement setting in.

You liked finding new things but this felt different. More personal. Spider told his loved ones almost everything, so you were genuinely surprised when he brought up the fact that he had a secret hideout. And knowing that you were probably the only other person to see and know about this place made it even more special and personal.

“C’mon,” Spider whispered, taking your hand in his as he gently pulled you inside, pushing the vines to the side to make room for the both of you to get through.

It was dark at first, the numerous vines making a dull thud sound as they fell back into place once Spider let them go. But then, small blue dots of light appeared, scattered across the walls and ceiling of the cave, lighting up the space in its dim light. The longer you two walked, the more brighter it seemed to get. The biolomenscient dots got dimmer and dimmer the further you and Spider went, the warm glow of the sunset replacing it.

Another opening made its way into your line of sight, giving you the perfect view of the eclipse and more.

“Holy shit,” you whispered out, hand still grasping Spiders.

The sight before you was absolutely breathtaking. Ikran flew across the setting sun, shrieking in delight as they dipped and dived. The floating mountains were scattered across the sky, thick and large vines connecting them to each other so they didn't drift too far from another. The vibrant colors the setting sun emitted settled across the horizon and danced across the tops of the trees beneath the cliff you and Spider were currently standing on.

Spider smiled at your response, warmth spreading across his body as he came to the conclusion that you were enjoying the sight before you. He felt nervous before, not wanting you to not like where he was taking you. But now, he felt so happy. Happy that you were awestruck and couldn’t tear your eyes off of everything in front of you.

“Like it?” He asked, hand squeezing yours to catch your attention.

“Like it?” You replied, eyes still darting across the beautiful scenery in front of you, “I love it! How come you didn’t take me here earlier?” You pouted at the end.

The boy only chuckled in response. To be honest, he considered this place to be his. Like a little secret. He wasn’t planning on sharing it with anyone. But the more he thought about it and visited the small cave slash cliff hideout, the more he wondered what it’d be like to share this place with you. He was over the moon when you agreed to tag along last night. This was no longer going to be just his spot but the both of yours.

Spider slightly tugged on your hand, guiding you to follow his actions in sitting down, legs dangling over the cliffs edge.

“It’s so beautiful,” you commented, settling yourself next to Spider, hands still intertwined.

The human boy hummed in response, eyes never leaving the side of your face. The setting suns colorful rays reflected off the glass of your mask, highlighting your bright eyes as you continued to gawk at the gorgeous sight in front of you.

To Spider, your beauty could never compare to what was in front of him. He had seen this kind of sunset millions of times before but he always found himself thinking of you whenever he gazed at the eclipse and the colorful horizon. You were truly one of a kind. He always felt special whenever you graced him with your presence. His eyes never left your face whenever the two of you hung out, oftentimes running into things on accident which made me even more flustered once your laugh reached his ears. If he were in a Na’vi body, his tail would be swaying furiously back and forth like a dog excited to see their owner whenever his eyes settled on your figure. You always had a special place in his heart. Which makes this moment even more special.

“Hmm, just like you, beautiful,” he whispered back, nudging your shoulder with his.

A wide toothed smile made its way across your lips, a giggle escaping them as you shook your head at the boy. “Cheesy,” you replied, eyes finally tearing away from the sunset and settling on Spider.

Your breath hitched in your throat when you realized how close the two of you were. Your shoulders were touching and your clasped hands were in Spider's lap, his thumb rubbing the back of your hand. If it weren’t for the masks you had to wear, you most likely would be able to feel each other's breath. Just the thought gave you slight goosebumps.

“Sappy,” Spider agreed, laughing in response to your previous statement. He tended to be overly romantic whenever around you. Albeit he never outwardly voiced his thoughts, he still thought them. You only got a glimpse or two of that side of him, it only being during whenever the two of you were joking around or he was trying to bring your spirits up on a particularly hard day. It never failed to make you feel better or laugh in response.

Your eyes were stuck on Spider's face, glancing from his eyes, to his nose down to his lips, and then back up to his eyes. He was probably the prettiest human boy you’d ever seen, and the only one you’d seen.

“Want to know how I stumbled across this place?” He asked, cheeks reddening at your intense stare.

“Please,” you responded, shifting a bit to face more towards the boy, hands still tightly interlocked.

Spider brightly smiled before starting, glad to be finally sharing this, his place with you.

———

You had stayed out way past curfew, too caught up in the beauty of Pandora to realize just how late you and Spider stayed out.

He had you put yourself on his back again on the way down, your hands returning to grip his shoulders as your legs tightly wrapped around his waist. You found yourself thinking about his muscles and his strength again, making yourself blush at every thought. The fact that you were so tightly pressed up against him and could feel his back muscles twitch and flex as he climbed down didn’t help, at all.

But he too was blushing. There have only been a handful of times where the both of you were in a position like this, so close together. Most of them were when you were children and still needed the comfort of someone else to sleep, Norm often finding the two of you entangled together as you softly snored away in your deep slumber. The other time being when you had a tickle fight and he pinned both of your hands above your head and tortured you with his swift fingers against the sensitive skin of your stomach. Spider almost kissed you that day, if it weren’t for Max’s interruption, telling Spider that Lo’ak was there for him. And the other time being now. It had been so long since he had you this close. Of course you two hugged and had sleepovers whenever you were bored, but even then, you never had your body that close to his and vice versa. Spider could feel the beat of your rapid heart against his back, smirking at how fast it was pumping.

It was nice to have you this close to his body. Especially in this circumstance. He felt like he was protecting you, in a way at least. Spider knew that you didn’t have the type of training he did regarding exploring the expanse of Pandora’s forests. You mostly explored on your own and kept to the forest floor whereas Spider leapt from tree to tree with Lo’ak and climbed whatever he could. And regarding this fact, he knew that you wouldn’t be able to pull yourself up to climb all the way to where he wanted to take you as well as back down. So this was the least he could do. Have you cling to his back as he descended back down to the mossy ground.

The minute your feet touched the floor, you took off sprinting, shouting at Spider to race you back to the lab. Poor boy barely had any time to process it, standing there in shock for a few seconds before quickly following after you, catching up to your figure within minutes.

The boy beat you to the lab even with your head start.

“No fair!” You whined out, huffing and puffing from your sprinting. Damn, you thought to yourself, and to think Spider does this everyday.

“Hmm, sucks to suck I guess,” Spider teased, patting your head as you stood there with your hands on your knees trying to catch your breath. Your mask began to fog up from your ragged breathing.

You playfully slapped Spider’s hand away as you both walked up the stairs to the lab, the boy holding the door open for you as you walked through.

Once the door shut, a hissing sound reached your ears, signaling that the filter was forcing out the Pandora air and replacing it with the air you and the other humans needed to breathe. When the small light above the second door turned green, you quickly discarded your mask and pushed through the secondary door.

“That was so much fun!” You exclaimed, wide smile on your lips as you turned back towards Spider, watching him place both of your masks back onto the small rack they usually reside on.

Warmth spread throughout Spider’s chest at your exclamation, proud that he was able to make you this happy from simply sharing his hideout with you. “I’m glad you had fun,” he replied, a gummy smile spreading onto his lips.

“Thank you so much for taking me! I really enjoyed tonight,” you continued, same smile still plastered on your face.

You felt grateful that Spider wanted to share a place he had found and kept to himself for a while with you. It made you feel special. Really special. You wanted to do something for him that showed your gratefulness. But your mind kept drawing blanks the more you thought about it. It had to be a grand gesture that showed him just how much you appreciated tonight as well as him in general.

Silence settled itself between the two of you, it resting comfortably in the air. Seconds had passed from the last time you spoke, eyes darting around Spider’s painted striped skin, the paint fading from the days excursions. As your eyes settled back onto his face, you realized that he was staring at your lips.

A lightbulb went off in your head. Yes, a kiss would work.

“I am very grateful that you decided to share your hideout with me. I feel honored,” you began, taking a step closer to the boy in front of you, “Is there anything I could do to show my appreciation?”.

Spider gulped at your question, one thing coming to mind. But, the boy only shook his head and shrugged. “It’s alright. I’m just happy to have spent tonight with you,” he replied.

Sappy motherfucker, you laughed to yourself, feeling yourself melt at how sweet Spider was being. You knew that he’d never force you to do anything that you didn’t want to do. Another thing that you loved about him. (Right after his face and muscles, of course.)

You hummed in response, inching closer as you did so. You could practically hear how fast Spider’s heart was beating against his chest, making you slightly smile at how you might be the cause of it.

“I think I have something in mind,” you trailed, straining your neck a bit to look up at the boy as you finally stood chest to chest. A few strands of Spider’s locs fell in front of his face and dangled besides yours, hand going out to tuck it behind one of his ears. The boys knees almost gave out at the movement, stomach twisting in knots and skin beginning to tingle from your gentle graze.

“And w-what could that b-be?” He stuttered, dark blush covering his cheeks. He felt his heart beat even faster as the seconds ticked by, if that was possible.

You smiled up at Spider, right hand coming to gently take his left one. “A kiss, perhaps?” You asked, not expecting him to agree right away.

“You…you w-want to…to k-kiss me?” He shakingly asked, the hand in yours intertwining his fingers between yours. He couldn’t believe that this was actually happening. That you suggested that you both kiss. He’s dreamt of kissing you ever since he saw the couple down his hall kiss when he was younger, Max yet again had to explain the action to him. Ever since he knew that he liked you. Since he knew that you’d be the only one for him as long as he breathed.

You nodded at his question, eyes falling from his eyes to his lips and back to his eyes. You also dreamt of kissing the boy. You wanted to ever since you saw an Earth movie from the twenty-first century where the two protagonists were lovers. You wanted to experience everything that the two lovers in the movies experienced with Spider. It was something you often caught yourself daydreaming about when you had nothing else better to do.

At your confirmation, Spider gently and delicately cupped your face in his warm and bigger hands, bringing you closer to his lips. There was a sliver of space between your lips and his, the teen boy waiting for something. Spider’s eyes searched yours for hesitancy and when he saw none and received another nod of your head, he pressed his plump lips against yours.

Your left hand went up to his waist to steady yourself, knees nearly giving out on the spot as your brain realized that this was actually happening.

Warmth was the only thing you felt from the kiss as well as adoration and care. You thought the whole fireworks thing was a bit silly whenever a character in a movie talked about it. But this, this was so much better than fireworks. You could feel how much Spider loved and cared for you through a single kiss. Could feel how nervous you made him through his shaky hands and rapid heartbeat. It was much better than fireworks. You felt loved and cared for through your shared kiss. You only hoped that Spider could feel the same things you did from the kiss as well.

The two of you stood there for who knows how long, kissing and pecking each others lips. You only broke away from the kiss two times to inhale more oxygen before you passed out. Spider meanwhile kissed all over your face as you did so, placing gentle kisses against your cheeks, nose, forehead, and chin before slotting his lips against yours again once you filled your lungs with sweet oxygen.

A loud cough erupted from behind you, halting the both of you in your kiss. Fear and anxiety spikes through your system, eyes widening as you slowly turned around to see who caught you and Spider kissing face.

“I don’t want to know,” Max started, arms crossed against his chest as a sleepy expression painted his face, “Just, get to bed. Separately. And if anyone asks, I saw nothing, okay?”.

You swear you never ran to your room so fast in your life, giggling out into the quiet corridors of the lab with Spider trailing behind you. Yeah, sorry Max, but there was no way that either of you were going to bed in your respective rooms tonight. There was too much to talk about and catch up on.

[peterman-spideyparker]

The Great War (Babe Part 2) (Matt Murdock x fem!Reader)

Author’s Note: Hey everyone! At the risk of forgetting to post part two, I'm doing it now! Like I mentioned in the first post, it's only a part two if you want it to be--you can just have read Babe and leave it at that, but this is just more idea to go with it that I couldn't stop my brain from working on. Enjoy! :)

Summary: It's been almost a month since you left Matt. Everything hurts, and you're doing what you can to get through. Foggy calls, and it turns out Matt's not doing much better. For the first time, you have no idea what your future with Matt Murdock looks like.

Listening rec: The Great War by Taylor Swift

Warnings: ANGST, Matt and reader are separated (Matt cheated), they’re both heartbroken at the situation, swearing, fighting/shouting/anger, throwing, Matt grabs reader (NO VIOLENCE, but the Devil of Hell's Kitchen pokes out), depression (mention of the word "borderline suicidal" in reference to season three Matt), Matt being reckless, lots of crying, drinking

Other Characters: Foggy Nelson

Word Count: 2,820

Before you can even say a feeble hello, Foggy is already speaking. “Matt’s devastated,” he breathes. 

You’re hurt. Offended, even. You left because of what he did in California, and he has the audacity to feel sorry for himself? “And I’m not?” you say, probably with more venom than appropriate. “Goodbye, Foggy.”

“Wait, hold on!” You don’t know why you don’t hang up, but you stay on the line. “I’m sorry. That wasn’t the right way to start this. How have you been?”

“I’m awful, Foggy. My marriage is done, my heart hurts, I’ve lost the man I love . . . I’ve never been worse.”

“(Y/N) . . . I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, Fog. All this is between me and Matt. It’s why you called, I’m guessing? Get all the answers for what exactly happened between us?”

“That’s between you guys. It’s none of my business or anyone’s. I’ve already ripped Matt a new one for doing what he did, and so did Karen and Frank, but he’s . . .” He stops and lets out a sigh. “Do you remember hearing from Maggie what Matt was like after Midland Circle? Despondent, depressed, borderline suicidal?”

Of course you remember, how could you ever forget? You’ve never seen him like that in your life. But the term “borderline suicidal” makes a pit grow in your stomach as you straighten up.

“He hasn’t tried to—?” you start to ask. 

“No, no, that was shitty wording on my part. But Matt’s not himself. It’s like watching a hollow corpse with a temper move about. He either doesn’t care at all, or a little thing will set him off. He’s being reckless on patrol, he’s drinking more than he usually does. I’ve been covering for him at the office, but . . . You need to talk to him.”

You close your eyes, tears rolling down your cheek. “I can’t, Foggy.”

“(Y/N)—.”

“He broke my heart, and I broke his in return. I stomped on it. I love him and I hurt him. If I talked to him . . . That’s salt on the wound for both of us.” More tears stream down your face as you think about it. “We both vowed not to hurt one another. H-He hurt me, but he wanted to fix it. I hurt him and don’t have that same courage to try.”

“Try now,” Foggy pleads. “Try now, help one another. Even if it’s for the last time.”

“O-Okay,” you say before you can realize it.

Foggy breathes a sign of relief. “Come to the loft.”

The loft. The scene of the crime.

You breathe a quiet confirmation before you hang up, taking time to mentally prepare yourself before you grab your purse and leave your sister’s place to talk Matt off whatever ledge he’s currently perched on. 

It’s a short trip, and Foggy meets you in the lobby of Matt’s building. He pulls you in for a long hug, and you actively tell yourself not to cry. 

“He’s that bad, huh?” you sniffle.

“Yeah,” Foggy sighs. “I’ve never been for him like this before. It’s like he’s not the same person.”

“I know what you mean,” you say quietly. “I haven’t felt like myself since that day.”

Foggy looks at you with a crestfallen expression, and you give him one more hug before you make your way up to the loft. 

Your key still works—you’re afraid if you knock, he won’t let you in. Hell, he probably heard you turn the block on your way here and wouldn’t answer out of anger or annoyance. Your stomach churns when you see Matt sitting in the chair. He’s in sweats, his posture is curved, his hair is disheveled, and he’s growing a thick beard. Beer bottles are on the table in front of him mixed with trash.

“Matt?” you breathe, but he remains unmoved. As you move closer toward him, he sits there like a statue, not caring to look your way. “Matt, it’s me.” Still, he doesn’t gaze your way. 

Putting your purse in its usual spot, you make your way over to him in the chair, gently cupping his face in your hands to tilt him up toward you. You suck in a small breath when you see the bruises and cuts on his cheeks, nose, and chin. If this is what his face looks like, you can only imagine the other injuries that his clothes are hiding.

“Matt,” you breathe. “What happened?”

He just closes his eyes in shame, starting to turn. You don’t let him, though, bringing his face back to center.

“Matty,” you plea. “Matt, talk to me, sweetheart.”

“You’re not my sweetheart anymore,” he finally says, and it burns like acid. You deserve it—you gave it just as good to him when he came back from California. “And I’m not yours.”

“We didn’t sign any papers yet,” you breathe, trying to lighten the mood as you hold back your own tears. “So, legally, I am.”

Matt peels back from my touch like he’s getting out of an itchy sweater. Okay, you deserve it. You deserve all of it.

“Matt—.”

“You left,” he spits. “You left just like everyone else, even when you swore you wouldn’t.”

You sit back on your heels. It hurts, but it’s the truth. “I did.” He turns back toward you like he’s shocked you actually admitted it. “I didn’t try to hear you out, and I’m sorry. I should’ve. It was . . .”

He turns toward you, ice in his blind gaze. You’ve never seen Matt like, this, and as he starts to slowly rise from his chair, it’s the first time you can say that you’ve ever been afraid of him. 

You spring to your feet as well, trying to at least keep things on the same level posture wise. 

“Now you’re trying to make things better?” he growls low. “You’re the one that tore it up in front of us. I wanted to stop the breakage, but you readied the wrecking ball. This shit is your mess. It’s like this because of you.”

Now you start to get mad. “Oh, just me? Any breakage that was the breakage that you started. Those images and videos were circulating for two whole days before you came home. I didn’t hear a single word from you—a ‘good morning’ or ‘I’m boarding my plane’ or otherwise. You just showed up here expecting it to all be fine—.”

“You don’t get to assume in this,” he grits, the space between you dangerously nonexistent as one of his hands tightly grab on to your wrist.

“Yes, I can. There’s two people in this mess. I’m saying what it seemed like on my end,” you say, your heart thundering in your chest. Matt wouldn’t hurt you—he’d never do that. But with how his hand is on your arm and the mood he seems to have been in since you left, you’re not entirely confident in that statement anymore.

“You never really knew a damn thing about me, did you?” he frowns. “You just kept a version of Matt Murdock in your head and lived with it this entire time, huh?”

“Maybe I did. Because this isn’t the Matt Murdock I came over to talk to. This is the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. So, if you’re gonna let the Devil out, let him out on me, Murdock. Do your worst.”

“Get the fuck out of here,” he threatens, the muscle in his jaw feathering as he clenches his teeth. 

“No. I came here to talk, and that’s what we’re gonna—.”

Before you know it, his hand is off your wrist, wrapping around the neck of a beer bottle before he whizzes it past your head like a threat. You flinch, moving to cover your head before the bottle leaves his hand, and you remain curled as the glass hits something behind you, knocking it over as they both crash to the ground. You slowly turn to see what was caught in the crosshairs—the beer bottle had hit a picture frame, knocking it down off the side table and breaking it. You can tell by the shifts in his body language he immediately regrets it, his shoulders slumping as tears start to sting your eyes. You notice he starts to take a step toward you out of the corner of your eye, but you’re on the move toward the broken picture frame. One of the pictures from our wedding.

Huh, you think. How fitting. 

You lower yourself to your knees, carefully picking it up and looking at how your faces were beaming with nothing but joy, how you held onto one another with love . . . and now how it’s the opposite. How you’re broken. You wouldn’t look at him the day you left, and he won’t look at you know. You curl over the photo, freely weeping on the pile of glass. You just want it things to go back to normal.

You hear Matt pad softly over to you, squatting as if he wants to put a hand on your back to soothe you, but he backs away to let you cry. Tears pour out of you like a geyser, a constant flow down your cheeks as you sit alone in the living room. Maybe it was an accident that he hit the picture, but his senses are so sharp . . . maybe he did want to hit it. Maybe he was trying to prove a point. Maybe he wanted to show you that by you leaving, you were the one who put the final nail in the coffin of your marriage.

Maybe he really doesn’t want you anymore. Maybe he stopped wanting you before he went to Los Angeles. Maybe he stopped wanting you a long time ago.

You’re still crying when you hear Matt come back over toward you. Through your limited vision, you watch him clean up the broken glass from the bottle and the frame. It takes him a few trips, but it’s eventually all cleaned up. He leaves again before walking back toward you, holding out a box of tissues. With a shaking hand, you grab one and wipe at your nose, desperately trying to calm yourself. 

“This is my favorite picture of us from our wedding,” you sniffle. “This is what I would grab if I could only take one thing from the loft in an emergency. This would be it. And now . . .”

You can’t finish your sentence, just weeping uncontrollably in your little ball on the floor over your two deepest treasures—this photo and your marriage. Shattered. 

“Angel . . .” Matt says so softly, so tenderly, you almost forget that your life has essentially imploded.

“This is all my fault,” you cry, spiraling, trying to trace it all back to you, your actions. The big explosive things all seem to have their root in something you can place back to yourself. Matt slept with someone else, but it goes back to something you did— you had a short attention span and a bit of a short fuse before he left because a bunch of shit at work that kept piling up, and you knew he was frustrated . . . how much he hates planes. You egged him on. You did nothing to help, and when he left to go to California, he found someone who understood him in a way you couldn’t. You need an answer for this, and that seems to be it.

“This is my favorite picture of us, and it’s all my fault,” you sniffle, repeating what you said earlier, your chest burning from the tears and hyperventilation. 

“It’s just a picture—,” he starts to say softly.

“It’s not just a picture,” you weep. “This, us, it’s all my fault. We’re broken because of me. This is all my fault.”

You hear Matt pad softly over to you, squatting down and taking the picture from your hands, putting it on the arm of a nearby chair before pulling you in for a hug. All you can do is sob against his shoulder as he holds onto you. 

“This isn’t because of you,” he tries to soothe, sounding like he’s about to cry as well. “It . . . It was my poor judgement, it was my shortcomings that did this. You’re in the flaming wreckage, and it’s not fair.”

“I just want things how they were,” you sniffle. “I want to come home. I want us to be okay.”

Matt’s silence is terrifying. “I don’t think I’ve ever felt rage like that. Darkness like that,” he says softly. You feel a tear fall from his cheek to the top of you head. “Shit, I grabbed you . . . Fuck, I’m so sorry. I-I would never—(Y/N), please—.”

“I . . . I,” you start. He’d never hurt you. For all his anger, for all his strength, Matt would never hurt you. But when you’re facing off with the man that patrols the streets? The man that brought down Wilson Fisk not once, but twice? You just didn't know. 

“I scared you.” Tears are flowing down his cheek. “I could hear your heart race . . . I knew you were scared and for a moment, and I didn’t care. It’s like I wanted you to be scared, and I liked it. I was glad you were scared of me.” He sounds disgusted with himself. “You really thought I was going to hit you.”

“I did. For a moment,” you admit. It catches in your throat, but there’s no use in lying if you’re trying to fix this. 

Is that what you came over to do? To fix this? 

He lets out a long breath, slumping to the floor. “What happened to us?”

“I . . . I don’t know,” you say. And it’s the truth. You don’t really know how you got to this point. Yes, you know why you walked out, but it’s like there were the small hairline fractures in glass—so fine that you couldn’t see them—and then a hammer came down on it and a million little pieces was left in its wake. But how he sounds . . . you know that tone. When it’s been a rough night on patrol, it coats his words like sap—he’s going into a dark headspace, and when he gets too far in, it’s hard to get him out, and you need to get him out. You move around to carefully sit next to Matt, putting a hand on his forearm. You can feel a thick bandage on his arm before you can process that he winces, so you move to slide your hand in his. 

“I know you’d never hurt me,” you breathe. “I know you’d never lay a hand on me like that.”

“But I did, though. If I added more pressure, I could’ve snapped your worst. It would have been easy for me to do.” You see him swallow the lump forming in his throat, his own self-hatred inflating at a dangerous rate. “I was full of rage. You were scared of me.”

“I’m scared of all of this,” you admit, your voice small. “What’s happening to us. How it’s effecting you and me. We’re . . . We’re not ourselves. I-I don’t recognize either of us. I don’t like it. I want things back how they were.”

“But they can’t go back.” He sounds broken, hollow—just how you feel. 

“Are . . . Are we too far gone?” you ask just above a whisper, terrified of the answer. 

“I don’t want us to be.”

You hang your head. “I haven’t been sleeping,” you admit. “It doesn’t feel right without you, your arms around me.”

He places a gently hand on your chin, lifting your face up and wiping tears off of your cheeks before pulling you in for a hug. It feels like warmth. Like love. “I can’t sleep in the bed. It smells like you, and with you gone . . . I just patrol all night.”

It’s like when you think your heart can’t break any more, it does. “I still feel so upset, but, I feel hollow more than anything. Like part of me is missing.”

“I’m sorry,” he breathes. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too. I-I’m so sorry.” He kisses the top of your head. “I should’ve listened, I shouldn’t have left like that, but I was just so upset. I couldn’t be around you without feeling like screaming or crying or both.”

“We . . . We can get through this. Can’t we?”

You think about it. Is this something you can do? You’ve been through worse— you’ve seen him near death more times than you would like, you’ve seen how the toll of Daredevil and the stress of being an attorney wear him down. Even the debate on how we should bring up our children should you choose to have them strained you both. But your happiness, your life together, it’s bigger than your low points. It has to be.

It has to be. 

Right?

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[tentacleplains]

temple/auriga lore dump?

i almost never purge when acting as a confessor in the temple because i find the combat system a little tedious, but i did today for the first time, and got a scene i haven’t seen before.

when purging the penitent, i made them climax, and then was prompted to do it again several more times until i blacked out. (no screenshots of this, sorry, i wasn’t thinking about it.)

then, i was met with this scene:

(1) It was invigorating:

(2) It was humiliating:

(3) What?:

from then on, i asked the questions in the order they popped up in the dialogue choices, so all the following passages are the responses to the first shown option in the preceding one.

bonus: after i left, and went to the cloister, the six-armed statue was labeled.

i have yet to see what this scene is like with a pure sydney! if anyone has that, i’d be grateful if they could add it to the post; if not, i’ll get it myself and add it here instead. ^^

notably, i know there is dialogue where the ivory wraith calls you gaoler, but i can’t remember the context in which they call you that, so i can’t meaningfully draw connections…