#I have been playing Pokémon thinking about my husband…

[salemripley]

I want him with me right now!!

[evenmorefatallyobsessed]

Milfs Models Candidates

Okay, so after many suggestions and research I've found some more possible Milf Candidates for me to make in the future. I would say don't judge me... But I think that'd be a lost cause.

Milf 01. Tsuki Uzaki

Y'know it's funny, I actually hate Hana, like she is kinda insufferable to me, I feel bad for Shinichi... Her mother, and sister (And Maybe Brother?) on the other hand... Yeah Tsuki is a top Class Milf.

Milf 02. Mitsuki Bakugo

I love her look, her attitude, just a perfect Milf, I shouldn't have to say more...

Milf 03. Nana Shimura

Muscle Momm-'Cough, Cough' Sorry, anyways, I like Nana, in the same way I like Endeavor, that is to say I like how their flawed individuals. But her flaw is the same as Summer's, she cares too much about doing good to the point where she hurt those close to her... Honestly someone should've slapped some sense into her when she decided to abandon her son. Like I get it, she just lost her husband the big bad would've targeted him... BUT C'MON!!! WHY WOULD YOU THINK OFA WASN'T ALREADY TARGETING YOU!!! Like she gets some leeway because obviously after just losing her husband she couldn't have been in the right state of mind but someone should've realized that possibility.

Milf 04. Lusamine

I hesitated with her mainly because I'd have to use the Hair accessories for her, and wouldn't be able to make other hair styles convincingly. But Yeah I'll probably be making her soon, cuz damn man, she's up there with Cynthia.

Milf 05. Susan Luong-Long

I, and I'm sure a good number of guys (And Girls) who blame this character for our fascination with Asian mommies...

Milf 06. Delia Ketchum

Honestly lowkey one of the best Pokémon Milfs.

Milf 07. Pokémon Black & White's Mom

Yeah, Pokémon knows exactly what it's doing by making Milfs like this...

Milf 08. Johanna (Dawn's Mom)

I Love Her Design, it's rather simple but utterly perfect!

Milf 09. Grace (Pokémon X & Y's Mom)

A sporty, country, mom who looks like she's ready to ride a bull, they really didn't use her near enough.

Milf 10. Prof. Sada

She makes me return to monke... those abs make, that tan, her wild look. Just, y'know a lot of people bought Scarlet for her alone...

Milf 11. Pokémon Scarlet & Violet's Mom

Penny was right, their mom is hot... I prefer the model with paler skin and deep brown hair myself.

Milf 12. Pokémon Sword & Shield's Mom

Not gonna lie, never played sword or shield, but I gotta say, she is a pretty mom. I like the glasses look with the overalls, gives her a fun vibe. I feel like there'll be a shock factor if I put her in other outfits too, so that'll be fun to see.

Milf 13. Pokémon Black & White 2's Mom

Mostly I wanna make her cuz there is a absolute lack of content of her and I'm kinda digging the idea of making her look utterly different with her hair down.

Milf 14. Lila Test

Y'know, I already wanna make Susan & Mary Test for Dexter when I get to him, so why not the mom too.

Milf 15. Charlotte Pickles

These three images convinced me, at first I couldn't see it, but thank you Anon, I've been shown the light. I like Milf in suits apparently... I learned something new about myself.

Milf 16. Jane Jetson

Ahh, Boomerang, how I miss you, this is just a Atlas Mom to me, and I feel like this further proves my childhood interest in redheads...

Milf 17. Wilma Flintstone

Y'know, I would complain that I can't find a decent pic of Wilma without Betty in it... Wait, No I Wouldn't! She next anyways. Well, this only serves to prove the whole Redheads thing lil' me had going on. I'mma say there from a Secluded Vacuian tribe, fucking savages... Hot, hot savage Milf.

Milf 18. Betty Rubble

Cavewoman are justice, and need to reenter the genepool of Remnant.

Milf 19. Carol from OK K.O.

Okay, so recently someone's ask me to make characters from OK K.O. Let's Be Heroes. Specifically Fink & Wilhamena, and to that all I have to say is... HOW DARE YOU NOT MENTION CAROL!!! Dude! Tanned Muscle Mommy! Seriously, she looks like she could be a badass. Not sure how faithful to the design I can be, or well want to be but I definitely like this character.

Milf 20. Wilhamena from OK K.O.

I mean, I get why so many people brought her up, I am looking forward to making this design, seems like it'd be fun. Still kinow nothing about the show though...

Okay, Last four... Gonna get a bit weird, feel free to judge me -_-

Milf 21. Nicole Watterson

I'd probably use the middle design as her actual model in Remnant making her a Faunus. Her Semblance would be '2D' Which references her cartoon origin but also can me Two Ds/ Doppelgangers, but well neither actually look like her but she can share her senses with them or have them act independently.

Milf 22. Lin (Millie's Mom)

Not gonna lie, I wanna make her half to have her get hate fucked (At Least at first), not the most honorable of intentions but FUCK HER!!! I get she's Millie's Mom, and a seemingly good one, but she hates Moxxie Way Too Much! How Can You Hate Moxxie! He's Adorable and a utterly devoted Husband! What, Just Cuz He's Not Country Strong, Fuck Off, No, Fuck Her! Fuck All The Bitch Outta This Milf With a Big Human Cock!

Milf 23. Toriel from Undertale

She is Literally the Goat HAHAHA!!! Okay but seriously I kinda have to make her. There is just WAY too much content for me to have ignored her. I typed in Game Milfs and this Goat showed up more then the Pokémon Moms.

Milf 24. Mrs. Kattswell

... God Dammit, I'm a fucking furry...

[narancias-headband]

A big announcement...

Hi everyone! Very long time, no see.

I've gone through and cleaned things up around here a good bit, deleting old posts and fixing up my masterlist again. You might have seen some posts as I fix things up around here.

But the short and sweet version of this post is...

I'm coming back to this blog!!

It's going to be a decent bit different than before, but I do want to write and share my thoughts with you all again. :)

An important note! I will no longer taking 'requests', but I'd love some inspiration from everyone! I'm not going to hold myself to write anything that doesn't seem right for me. Feel free to send in requests/ideas for inspiration, and please do not be offended if I never get to them! I promise, I'm not judging! Some brief rules on what to ask for are here in my pinned post (they're mostly the same as before haha).

A very LONG rambling update under the cut for anyone wondering what in the world I've been up to.

So... A lot has changed in the past few years here... It's been like a year since y'all have heard from me... Mainly, my hyperfixation on JoJo's went away for a while. So that's my brain's fault haha. I've done this a few times with a few blogs, so I guess I was expecting to drop it sooner or later. What I didn't expect was how much I miss this blog (believe me, I have no regrets on my old blog deaths).

I've been watching JoJo's with a dear friend of mine lately, and the need to write has been stirring again. And then we hit Part 5... My brain was shifted back into fanfic mode instantly. I saw Formaggio and remembered my dear husband. I went and read through so much of my old stuff and remembered how much fun I used to have writing. I'm already working on a few new things, and a few old things, but I'm in no rush.

Which relates to some of the changes I'm hoping to make here. In all honesty, I did a lot here for the attention of people and the approval of the fandom. And that is not sustainable! No wonder I had writing burnout so much... I'm not planning to take as many requests anymore, and I will be much more focused on creating things that make me happy than anything else. Hopefully others enjoy it anyway :)

So... What have I been up to? My life has been taking lots of unexpected twists and turns. My, not entirely intentional, unemployment has opened up some free time to get back to things I enjoy. And I will never let a job take over my life like that again. Good news is, I'm working on my mental health and I finally feel creative again! I want to write and draw and think and I actually have the energy for it!

I've been very lost in the awful job market lately, and being at home alone all day isn't the most thrilling, but even just the minor things I've been doing behind the scenes on this blog have made me feel great. It's a bit more fulfilling than just playing Fortnite all day 😅

And me? I've grown up a lot lately. Working through mental issues, focusing on myself and my happiness, making changes for the better. Which is the main reason I really want to come back! This blog made me so happy and that's my main goal lately. I'm back into JJBA hardcore, I've become a Fortnite kid, and my love of Pokémon has come back in full force. And I have a new pretty gaming PC to sit and write at and the more I use it the more it's worth the $1500 I spent on it.

Oh, and one last thing... For better or worse, I've pretty much ended up a functional stoner. 😅 Probably expect more headcanons about getting high with diff characters that will be way better than the goofy ones I wrote way back when.

[polyamorouspunk]

Going on a double date tonight with Mountain Boy and his friend Medschool Boy and his gf. Very excited!! Going to a place thats like an adult playground with pinball machines, giant jenga. Arcade cabinets, bowling, bocce, fire pits, and SLIDES. And also alcohol. More excited about the slides though lol

Hope youre doing good bestie 💛

Wow that sounds great Key! I hope you had so much fun!

I flew in back home on Thursday morning and from the airport we went to visit my brother at work because it was the most convenient place to stop! My brother visited some other stores in the mall with us and I got to see the work he’s been doing in person, which he’s been proud of for years (working his way up in the business).

Then my two best friends and my best friend’s husband and my gf went to Cracker Barrel because she wanted to go and there’s not one near where we all live, so we drove out to go and my two best friends and her had so much fun and bought stuff.

The next day I crashed at my best friend’s house and hung out with their mom for the day before everyone came over and we went and got pizza at the pizza place we all grew up eating at, and then we went back and played card games.

The next day I hung out with my best friend’s dad and we used the laser printer that I showed you and I had SO much fun with it. A lot of my stuff broke which sucks so I’ll have to glue it back together. I also accidentally snagged one of my best friend’s pieces. I caught one that was hers but I ended up taking another by mistake. They have the files on the computer though (my art) to make another if she really wants though. Her dad told me all about the machines he’s invented and the whole time he was apologizing if he was boring me but I just kept asking questions and he kept showing me videos and explaining things rather well to me, and he taught me how to use the laser printer and made me run it (like a dad teaching his kid how to do something) so that was fun.

After that we watched Pokémon Horizons. My best friend unfortunately fell asleep during it as she works long hours early in the morning but the thought was there.

Then Sunday we left to go to NYC and I got to see Tallah and say hi to Justin! He made me take a free CD of their EP because he says I spend too much money on him (truth) but I think I left it in CT so I’ll either have to get my best friend to mail it to me or get it when I hopefully come back up in May to see Electric Callboy.

[mrslittletall]

So, it is the last day of the year... Let's reflect, shall we... You probably all know what happened at the end of last year. My husband got sick, I brought him to the hospital thinking it is an easy fix and then he was basically dying with sepsis. So yeah, that was... not great. Especially with all the complications that arose. He is home now, but he is not healthy yet. We have at least one surgery left and it will happen in January and then I hope he can finally go into rehab for good. The good news are, he is getting better and better at home, he even can stand for a few seconds, so I am positive a proper rehab can be done towards the end. He will be disabled for a good while though. Anyway, this year has been a challenge, both emotionally and physically, because I was suddenly alone and had to handle things that my husband normally does. I kinda realized I am stronger than I look then because carrying two sixpacks of 1,5 l water bottles was impossible for me once. It isn't anymore. I tried being creative when I found time, but I had to admit to myself that it isn't happening somewhen in Summer, so I went on hiatus, only writing when I truly had nothing else to do and going on a complete art hiatus. I miss it though. I want to write and draw regularly again, but there are still too many things in my mind. Mainly the stuff with my driver's licence because for some reason me running to my husband in hospital while in distress and accidentally damaging a car while parking which I didn't even notice is a warrant to punish me really really hard. I am still salty about that, yes! So how did I cope? Easily with indulging myself in video games: Let me put that under the cut:

When the thing with my husband first happened I barely was able to do anything. I was mostly cleaning and tidying up the apartment and then watch videos on Youtube because if I broke out in tears during this it was easy to pause and blow my nose. It took a few days and my husband getting better so that I could try and do other stuff again. And I really really indulged myself into Pokémon Scarlet. The games were pretty fresh during that time and I played them a little but not much, but now... I was hooked. I had days off work and if I wasn't visiting my husband, I would sit in front of my Switch and play Pokémon Scarlet and my god, did I love it! The story, the characters, the open world, the music... yes they are technical not well programmed, but I did never mind because that game gave me a peace of mind. Even after I finished the story I sat there each evening doing the Tera Raids. I love the Tera raids. Gen. 9 games are easily my favourite Pokémon games since Gen. 4 and funnily enough, when Gen. 4 came out I also had a hard time in my life, so I guess Pokémon is like my therapy game now... But of course I wasn't playing Pokémon the whole year. After I was done with it, I decided to finally finish Darkest Dungeon with a little help of one of my Discord servers. I pretty much only had the Darkest Dungeon left, but it takes a while because a group that went into it will never enter it again, so you basically have to level up four teams for each quest and that only if you don't fail it. Anyway, I had the game on hiatus for a whole year, so it felt good to finally finish it. And then I was like "Oh, I remember Anno 1800. I bought the History version a while ago but never played it. Let's do it." I then installed the game and was like "Hmmm, maybe I should get the other DLCs as well?" and they were on sale so I just got the last pack and started Anno 1800 with all DLCs activated.

And I got hooked for the first part of 2023. God, I played this game a lot. I also streamed it to friends so they could indulge in the towns that are being build up. Me and my friend Panda called it the "Autism game" because it basically is like building up your own miniature model town, only that everything is alive and moves around. The game however, can get overwhelming, especially with all DLCs, so I wasn't able to play it lately. I want to come back to it though. I also got myself into the Cooking Mama games when I was depressed and browsed Amazon for used DS games to see if I can get some nice deals. I bought the first Cooking Mama, tried it and was hooked. After a while I decided to buy the rest of the series and had five games to play for my DS and 3DS. I finished them all and they were a really good time. They also renewed my interest in trying new recipes at home, but that has to wait until my husband is better. And then I downloaded Final Fantasy 14, in an attempt to connect better to my husband because he played this game a lot before he became sick. I quickly got hooked, mostly because of the music. I upgraded to the full game even before I finished Heavensward (which is included in the free trial) and am currently at Endwalker and wow, just wow! There are flaws of course, but this story has been a roller coaster and I really have fun with the group content like the dungeons and the alliance raids and stuff! I hope my husband can go back to his character soon (his hands bother him still so he doesn't want to play) so we can play together. And that after I was like "Nah, after WoW I will never play a MMO again." Whoops... Speaking of Final Fantasy, in February TheatRhythm Final Bar Line released and I played the shit out of that game! I love the FF music, I love rhythm games, it is a match made in heaven. I even tried my hand on the supreme scores and they are truly super duper hard! Could only clear them with a full healer team, but playing them also meant that ultimate felt easy... I also played a charming indie game named Ato at the start of the year. It is basically a Metroidvania bossrush, but a really really good one with hidden lore you can find in the world. The final boss had me in tears and the music was so so good! I wholeheartedly recommend this game. It isn't super long either, you can finish that game in eight to ten hours depending on your skill.

In summer there released the new Harvest Moon and Story of Seasons games, but I kinda wasn't hooked with them. I will probably play them more once my husband is better. Instead, however, I got hooked by Rune Factory 3. I bought both 3 and 4 Special Edition for my Switch and decided to play 3 for and this game is so charming and I love the characters a lot and the gameplay loop is fun and ugh, why didn't I play these games sooner?! Yeah, I played RF3 a lot and I still have to finish it, but my husband mostly has the Switch at the moment and he deserves it after being away for a whole year ^^ Speaking of the Switch, Metroid Prime Remastered! My birthday gift for myself. The game is as fantastic as ever and even though I didn't 100 % it, I got a lot of the items and then beat the final boss. And speaking of big Nintendo IPs, Zelda Tears of the Kingdom. Like BotW it needed a while to grip me, but once it did, I was fascinated! I still have to finish it however, it is a big game and it will keep me busy for a while longer. Now it is the end of the year. I am still busy with FF14 and Zelda ToTK. Pokémon DLC released and I wanna play that. And I bought Lies of P for my PS5 and love it so far! I am updating you guys about Lies of P regularly and sometimes about FF14 and Zelda. Also, I decided to use my Steamdeck more, so I play a dungeon crawler named Silent Hope on it (from the Story of Seasons developers, that got me interested) and I started a cozy game named Potion Permit. Of course I threw my Laurence into it. Feels fitting for him to be a chemist xD What will the new year bring? Hopefully my husband will be better and will be able to walk again. Other than that, I hope that I keep my licence. And then... I just hope that I can continue being creative and if not... I keep playing my games.

[thelegoninjagomovie]

sitting down very gently on your floor..........tell me about. misako

YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

fun fact misako is the character that has been possessed the most times. once in the show once in the books once in shadow of ronin that’s a video game. and i think i’m forgetting one i can’t remember :P

speaking of shadow of ronin i HATEEEEE that it’s the only game where she’s playable bc they do some weird shit with her when she’s possessed….. like very strange not needed doesnt add anything to the story weird. so tired of her being forced into situations </3

the misako suicide attempt thing is actually hilarious and i still wonder how they got away with it to this day. the episode came out in 2013 which is just. idk that makes it so much funnier to me. also one episode after being introduced the writers were like ok time to make her try to kill herself

if she was a pokémon she would be mew and a whole lot others but mew is my fav rn. mewsako.

i used to have nightmares that misako would be trying to kill me and she was a fnaf animatronic. when i would be playing toontown i would always think hmm my toon is like if she was fnaf…. :) but i’m scared of fnaf and watching anything if it past like 5 is setting me up for a nightmare. and the thing is she would be the only mf trying to kill me.

my misako minifig is best friends with bowser she is currently sitting on his head

if she was a cat she would be a siamese

i think she should’ve killed garmadon. that’s her piece of shit husband. ripped him opened scourge tigerstar style

i won’t lie i think what people think misako is is actually one of the best interpretations ever. if it wasn’t the most obnoxious borderline sexist losers saying this i think it would be so funny. also a lot of it is just autism traits so thats something. <no clue if ppl still use those but it was p common back in tha day

that thing (misako) is autistic god bless her

in the ninjago movie there’s a character that supposed to be misako but u cannot convince me they are the same come onnnnn. that’s like showing me a picture of a dog and a cat and telling me they’re the same animal. theyre girlfriends the end.

i love koko the orange haired one but misako just has the autistic swag and fail aura about her

misako is the best fictional character ever i think. in my opinion :)

if misako was a dog she’s be a shetland sheepdog

typing all this got me kicking my feet and giggling. love her so much.

my animal jam character bc i’m too lazy to get on toontown

anytime i think about rewatching season 6 of ninjago i cringe because ONCE AGAIN misako is forced into a weird and disgusting ass situation i’m not getting into it but literally being forced to hear her scream about not being left alone like oh ok. KILL

it’s 2 am i’m a littol sleepy so here’s a picture of misako :) thank you for listening

cat named misako:

there’s definitely shit i’m forgetting but i’m tired thank you for presenting this opportunity to me stella i love you forever and ever and ever and ever <3 <3 <3 <3

[hwaksimpokemon]

give us your honest opinions on all of rainbow rocket, then. if you have time

Ooh, boy. Okay. Someone's going to show up at my house-

I do want to preface this by saying I don't agree with any of their actions relating to legendary pokémon. I'm talking about the person I interact with out of necessity at the meetings.

Maxie: Maxie's a bit... sharp around the edges. But he's not bad at all, really, once he trusts you a little bit. We've had our disagreements, sure. He really did not like me when we first met. We can talk, now. And it's nice.

Archie: Archie and I get along well! We have a similar outlook on a lot of things, especially on Giovanni's trapping methods. And he realizes now that his plans with Kyogre were a little... well, his intentions were good. Same as Maxie. The methods weren't. Archie is one of the few people at those meetings that does look out for me where he can, and I appreciate that.

Giovanni: Oh, Giovanni... I punched his lights out pretty recently. And it felt amazing. And I hated it. I hate being angry, I hate being violent when I don't need to be, but he just would not. Stop. Talking. And I needed him to shut up. I am so sick of the way he makes me feel, the way he makes me look to people around us- I hate that he makes me look stupid, makes me look weak. I despise the hold he has over me, and I hate that he won't tell me what he keeps me around more. ... I hate him.

Chairman Rose: Rose and I don't speak often. I barely even know what he does- he's not been at the meetings since I started attending, dealing with some 'personal issues' back in Galar. I really don't have a strong opinion either way on him.

Piers: I admire how he looks after N. I also admire his honesty. We don't talk much, but I think he's a good kid.

Ghetsis: I despise him. The way he treats both people and pokémon makes me sick. I healed his Hydreigon once after a battle, and it showed up at my house that night, that's how shit he is to it. He's a vile human being, and I don't know how Colress deals with him. He was almost nice to me once, when he made me a cup of tea, before promptly criticizing my husband for marrying a man. He also tried to kill my brother, and nearly killed me. Giovanni had to stop him.

N: Honestly, I don't really know what N is doing in our meetings. He's uncomfortable around Ghetsis, which is completely fair, and I don't think he even really wants to be there. I sit next to him. We have nice conversations. I gave him a fidget cube once when he was anxious, and he returned the favor at the next meeting. He's a good kid.

Colress: Colress is lovely. Redirecting his efforts to something beneficial now that he's not fully tied to Ghetsis is amazing, and he's genuinely just a lovely person. We've battled on occasion, and I've normally lost, but it's always a fun time. We play Scrabble together, and have a rule where you can spell words however you want. We are both dyslexic.

Lysandre: I have... mixed feelings on Lysandre. For reasons I can't really delve into. It would be unprofessional of me. I do want to say, though, that he never did anything to me directly. Of Rainbow Rocket, he is nowhere near the worst.

Lusamine: She was awful to her children, and I resent her for that. I'm also from Alola, and was visiting when she opened up the wormholes. She put my family in danger, and I resent that too. I know of nothing good she's ever done.

Cyrus: Cyrus is... complicated. One the one hand, he's friends with Kamiya (who I will get to, don't you fucking worry), but on the other, he's... decently pleasant when he visits. He comes over to my house every now and then, and we talk. I worry about him wandering the island so often. I hope he's alright.

Kamiya Sakoda: Where to fucking start with you, Kamiya? He helped me through my second divorce. Namely, he helped me realize the way my husband was treating me and my son. Let me stay at his house while I was figuring things out, and was generally helpful to me. Even set me up with my new husband. Then he got upset that my attention wasn't fully on him anymore. And he started being a dick. I had been hiding from my father, at the time- meeting with him and my brother occasionally, but not letting them know where I was staying. For my own safety. But they found out eventually, and dragged me out of my home to beat me. Twelve hours in, they called our family doctor (who just so happens to be Kamiya's fucking wife) so of course, he showed up. Carried me back to his house, insisted I stay for my own safety. Generally 'caring', when he wasn't hitting my injuries. Turns out, he was the one that told my father where I was. I was furious when I found out. Angry at him for doing such a thing, angry at myself for not seeing it coming- it was horrible. I'll never forgive him. For any of it.

Haruka: My ex-husband. The one Kamiya helped me get away from. I don't want to think about him.

Zero: Zero freaks me the fuck out. I'm sure that's probably his whole thing, but it works, and I don't like it. He's horrifying to look at, boring to talk to, and overall just not my cup of tea.

Lucio: Lucio is just plain unpleasant. He thinks he's better than he is, and it shows pathetically. His business is shady at best, and at worst, plain predatory. He also has an annoying habit of hurting people that work for me.

[recoiloperated]

Kind of long under the cut

I'm sure you're expecting some soppy story about how we met, but no. Of all places we met in a soup kitchen, both of us were volunteering, It was kind of my misguided way of trying to correct the wrongs of my previous life. She was a dorky, stars in her eyes do gooder. And I? Hell. I was a wreck then, unkempt beard, dirty shirt, ripped pants. I looked more like a homeless guy then a volunteer, I figured she was just some college student trying to make merit or something. She seemed like the type...

Honestly, I kind of forget how it started. She just showed up and started talking with me, and the next thing I knew we were getting dinner that wasn't soup kitchen soup. And then coffee, and then wedding cake... God knows I don't deserve her...

Learning she was a B class superhero was a little bit of a shock. We had been married for about 2 years and I had no suspicions, some super villain, eh?

She got some of minor injury tangling with an upper c class villain, and the consortiums translocator, frame shift, showed up in my house. I almost killed him on accident, fortunately I missed entirely. What can I say? I was 5 years out of practice.

At one point I had fantasized about boarding Oracle station as a conqueror, now I was carried on to it as a husband worried about his wife.

It was interesting, there were a lot of other hero's spouses there too. Apparently there's a weekly support group, so of course my beautiful bride bullied me into joining it.

I was a little bit uncomfortable at first, obviously there were a lot of people on board the oracle I had clashed with. surprisingly, no one ever seemed to suspect who I was. If you had asked me whenever I was flamberge what kind of person I thought the living infinite was outside of his superheroing, I would have said that the s class hero was probably a total prick.

He's actually a pretty down to earth guy named Luke who plays pokémon.

They spoke of me like some kind of demon in the dark, which was something between saddening and flattering. S class meta humans are incredibly rare, really it's only me and the living infinite. Most meta humans are E-Class, hardly more superhuman than a particularly good athlete. There's a few d-class heroes, but they mostly stick to stuff like getting kittens out of trees. 

Anyways, my wife, Minerva. Known by her superhero name as Saberina- Yes, I bully her about the pun. Had gotten a couple of broken bones, nothing really serious, and the mook that did it got grabbed and locked up. All's well that ends well.

Honestly, I kind of enjoyed hanging out with the heroes for once. This showed me all sorts of stuff, including the simulator they built to simulate fighting me, they based on totally fraudulent idea of what my power was, which is funnily actually my wife's power. Though she has it to a lesser degree than they were attributing to me. "Your wife may someday be able to refine her power to the same level as flamberge," Luke told me once after sparring with my mechanical double. "Right now she can cut through almost any terrestrial material, but, still can't cut me."

I had taken a lot of pains to hide my real power, most people assumed my sword was magic, letting me cut anything. Which was exactly what I wanted them to think. The sword in fact, is a cheap replica I stole as part of my first heist, My power has nothing to do with it. But what made me S class is the fact that I wounded the living infinite with it. I didn't even think I could whenever I tried, and it made my life so much more difficult. From a simple A class bank robber to a globally hunted super villain, branded as the world's Greatest evil? Money and greed lead me down that path and it took forever to escape it. Sure, I have a ton of cash in various untraceable accounts, and when the whole Nation of France surrendered to me I just *HAD* to march into Paris to claim my certificate of surrender. I still have it too. It's too funny.

My favorite part was when we had a casual chat about how various heroes would have faired against different dead, missing or imprisioned villains- bro when they got to me, well- Flamberge. Everyone when dead silent until I claimed my wife would have had him whipped before he knew it. That was funny as hell. If only they knew

It was another 5 years, during which I actually became pretty good friends with Luke before it happened. Seven years of bliss with my wife, we were talking about her retirement and kids, and then frameshift, or Jack, as I knew him now, came and got me.

It was bad.

Really bad.

I... I still can't really think about it...

See, metahuman power classes are exponential. And a group of villains jumped her, a few D class, a few C class... And BloodPrice. The only active A class villain.

She was.... Broken. Her whole body was a terrible bruise, her ribs, arms, legs... I could see her shattered bones poking at her skin...

Jack gave me this speil about gathering Intel, putting together a team, bringing them to "justice"

While their metahuman doctor Caduceus warned me that she might die even with his A class healing abilities...

I didn't want justice... I wanted revenge.

I stayed that night with her, Luke was gone on some mission to represent us at some interstellar thing, Andrew- Talisman, one of the two active A class heroes, was trying to get a team together and work on a plan.

But I had a plan.

My plan was 195cm of sharpened steel.

Even when I was a supervillain I rarely killed, sure. My hands aren't clean, but I was never gratuitous. I wounded and injured a lot. hell, I took one of Andrews fingers clean off. Caduceus grew it back, but I still felt A little bit guilty.

I didn't bother with my old suit, just the sword, my pants, boots, and the zip top pull over I was in the day they hurt her.

The weight of the sword on my shoulder felt intensely wrong. And so, so, so very right.

I hid my true power well... I might not be in my garish Landskenecht outfit, but the swagger came naturally back, the C-class guarding the door, I think they called him Cinder? tried to stop me by setting me on fire. Not much use against a guy who's power is manipulating material properties. My skin and clothes were fire proof, and my bones were osmium dense. I smashed him through the wall with a left hook and all my strength. What was left of cinder was a pink haze that settled on everything and everyone. I remember saying "Where's BloodPrice. He hurt my wife, I'm here to make him pay." Before the party started, and I remember a flurry of blows, the heat, the cold, the venomous plants clawing at my skin, and the bite of my blade against them. An arm flying severed, a leg laying next to a B-class villain, and the blood, I waded through it, cutting and clubbing them as I moved through them until finally I was done. BloodPrice fought viciously, but in the end, I'm flamberge.

I made his bones like glass and skin like porcelain...

And I broke him, like he broke her.

Then I left, covered in gore and the blood of other men. And staggered out into the parking lot of the abandoned warehouse... To see him. A galaxy distilled into a man, a fractal individual.

"Luke." I said, afraid of what happens next.

Slowly, he settled to the ground near me. "Darren."

The silence stretched for eternity.

Finally "the hurt my wife Luke. Maybe killed her, my wife - my love." My voice caught. His hand rested heavy on my shoulder, his other hand held open in front of me. "I need it still. She needs to be protected." I told him. "Maybe you should do that with a new sword, not one with such a dark history..." He answered. "I came here expecting to find an enemy Darren, I hope I found my friend instead."

I gave him the sword.

I don't regret it.

Emily, my daughter is 7 next week. And Luke, my son is 3. We're expecting our third end of the year.

I freelance with the consortium every once in a while. They call me the paladin though. It's a nice change...

You’re a retired S-tier supervillain. After you retired, you married a B-tier hero. You are forced back onto the stage when an A-tier villain attempts to kill your spouse.

[ruminate88]

Fight or Flight? 07/17/24

I just feel bad 😔 Every guy I’ve ever tried to love made me feel bad and they could not accept me the way I am. I know I gave my deepest admiration to these men who just can’t show up for me in return.

Now my husband is starting to make me feel so bad 😭😭😭 he’s stressing out over money to where he’s making me feel bad when I’m not the one who buys stuff. I only do the groceries. I buy nothing extra. When we first got together, I felt so safe with him away from my ex Andrew. My husband was just the nicest and most understanding and supportive guy. He never treated me like I was crazy and he protected me against Andrew is why I felt safe enough to marry him. We had a beautiful wedding and honeymoon.

now here we are… everything is so expensive and work is hard. Life is hard. I’m trying to get over the past the best way I can. I keep waking up in the night and struggling to stay asleep. I’m trying so hard to connect with my husband, I even started playing Pokémon go with him so I can spend time with him but the way he stressed and talked yesterday about the money and about his job, made me feel like I’m back with Andrew 😭 my husband has never been mean to me ever and I don’t think he’s trying to hurt me but I do think he’s frustrated cuz it’s so hard to save a lot of money right now because of how expensive everything is. 😝😝😝 (but I wanna be more important to him than money)

My solution is we just spend less and cut back but that’s not his solution. Idk what to do. I keep fighting not to compare my husband to my exes. I am trying so hard to trust that he’ll continue to keep me safe but yesterday the way he was stressing out soo bad, I felt very defensive and like I wanted to run. I’ve been in survival mode too many years. My husband won’t understand that. He’s never had to be there. All the way back in school, I was just trying to survive there till my mom let me be homeschooled but then all these toxic relationships I was in were keeping me feeling like I have to run away…. I never feel like anyone accepts me. 😢😢😢

I don’t want to run from my husband. I don’t want to not be able to deal with the uncomfortableness. I’m trying to stand up for myself and be honest. I’m trying not to jump into flight mode and ignore my problems. I’m trying so hard to face my problems and deal with them. In this healing journey, I’m finally recognizing and accepting my short comings. I know I talk about my exes a lot but I also see my issues, fears and insecurities. I’m trying to be a better me but also I’ve lost me so much when do I stand by my own side? I’ve been there for all my exes and trying to show up for my husband but I’m tired too. Tired of trying to convince myself.

No one knows how painful it is to lose trust in yourself when you’ve been in multiple toxic relationships 💔💔💔💔 When do I trust me again???

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #20

I was quite fallow today. Fallow and uninspired. I wonder if you get days like that. I wonder what you do when you have days like that.

I started today by trying to rebuild a Dance Dance Revolution pad. I don't have any pictures to show you yet that are any good. But during my attempt at its reconstruction, I realized that I need at least 3 additional arms to do what I am trying to do. Unfortunately, I cannot spontaneously grow extra limbs. So I asked for help with the reconstruction of the item. Hopefully, that help will arrive tomorrow.

I had intended to spend the day rebuilding this pad, and with that unexpected development, the wind in my sails was gone. I thought about going to Eggcellent to work on the music box, but for some reason I just couldn't muster up the energy for it.

So I played Pokémon. I tried to stay hydrated. But that was basically it for today. Some days are like that for me. I've not quite figured out a pattern to when they occur. The only thing I know to do for it is to wait it out and try to take good care of myself in the meantime.

It will be my birthday soon. I'm trying to get some of my favorite people in the same place at the same time for the sake of it. I thought of at least 15 people to invite. If I count myself and my husbands, that's 18 people. And I learned that trying to coordinate the schedules of 18 people is difficult, haha!

It's looking like the week of my birthday is no good for basically anyone, so I'll select some other week. It also looks like I'll have to have two gatherings, because there were some irreconcilable differences in availability and the like. I think the anxiety of trying to coordinate everything and also waiting for responses might have also contributed to me being kind of thrown for a loop today. Oh well.

It's incredibly lucky for me, I think, that I have so many people in my life now who actively want to help me celebrate the fact that I came into being. How swanky is that? :)

I have asked them not to get me presents. I just want their time and company. We will go to places with tasty snacks and delight in each other's presence, and that will be good.

I wonder what it would be like to have time and company with you as well. Would you attend? Would you come eat sushi or hotpot with us? Would you laugh at all our weird jokes? Join in our random conversations? Would you, finally being around other neurodivergent folk, feel like you belong somewhere for once? Would you have fun? Would you feel safe and welcomed?

I've said before that you'd fit right in with us - our little band of misfits and minorities - people who have been "othered" by broader society. I still think you'd feel right at home with us. You won't find a less judgmental bunch of people anywhere, I think. 😄

I wish you could come hang out with us. Alas, the ponderings of such wishes can only exist in the land of daydreams.

I'm more than a little tired for reasons that are unclear to me. So I guess I'll end this one here.

May the knowledge that there is at least one person in the vastness of the universe who would welcome you to sushi and hotpot with friends lend you the necessary strength to keep yourself safe, as well as the necessary resolve to choose kind and loving means by which to remain safe.

I'll write again sometime soon.

Your friend, Lumine

[i-cant-find-a-good-username]

if you get this, answer w/ three random facts about yourself and send it to the last seven blogs in your notifs. anon or not, doesn’t matter, let’s get to know the person behind the blog

1. I’ve been making my way through playing all of the D&D 5e classes. So far I’ve done Barbarian, Bard, Bloodhunter, Druid, Monk, Paladin, Ranger, Rogue, &Sorcerer (still need to play Artificer, Cleric, Fighter, Warlock, &Wizard and I’ve got ideas for a few of them). I enjoy learning the specifics of the different play styles and getting to do things in a way that people might not think to do right off the bat. But thief rogue is always gonna have a very special place in my heart, I really loved the play style I had for that character. It was very natural and easy for me in a way that my more charismatic characters escape me (I still love them with me entire being, my bard just stresses me out with how eloquent she is)

2. I was a selectively mute child and my family had to learn about Pokémon, Harry Potter, or both in order to get me to practice speaking at all. I did speech therapy for about 7ish years due to it (had great vocabulary, I was a voracious reader, just had trouble getting the words out of my mouth)

3. I met my husband over a game of Cards Against Humanity in the halls of the theater building at our community college. I was determined for us to be casual and then 4 years later I asked them to marry me. We’re on 8 years now and the poor thing’s stuck with me /lh

[starrystar]

Described!

58

Minty aqua alcohol ink background:

It turned out my math was wrong. I was never quite clear on volume and cubes vs. squares, which one led to me accidentally getting a mile of mulch delivered that was larger than my car. 

Bob was actually a seventh the lump he used to be.

Dr: That’s very good!

SB: Woohoo!

We booked my surgery for right before New Years. I just had to get through twelve more weeks of chemo.

59

Orange background with kind of a burnt gray happening at the bottom. 

The nurses were right. Taxol was easier. It was also much more annoying.

RN: You’ll want to ice your hands and feet for an hour during treatment to prevent neuropathy. 

SB: Oh. Joy. 

RN: It’s much better than it was in the old days. Everybody got neuropathy back then. 

SB: …yay?

60

Bright spring green watery background. 

I ordered special socks and gloves off Amazon that went in the freezer. 

I had been playing video games on my switch during chemo. Now I had enormous ice mittens strapped to my hands and could just about grip a stylus well enough to turn pages in an eBook. I am an avid reader, but it is surprisingly difficult to find a really gripping book every week for three months. 

SB: I just want a story that’s more interesting than being poisoned right this minute. Is that so much to ask? 

It didn’t help that I started getting excruciating abdominal cramps during the taxol. 

Note: Apparently this is a rare but known side-effect. Figures. Weirdly, still not as annoying as the ice mittens.

61

Lavender swirly background. 

In addition to cramps and ice socks, weekly chemo meant weekly lab work and weekly doctor appointments. DR: I feel like I just saw you. 

SB: Same here. 

My husband couldn’t get a day off every week, so I had to start getting rides from friends. I really really hated that. I know they didn’t mind and I know they were happy to help and I know they knew I was grateful, but I felt needy and helpless and I hated it. 

62

Bright aqua background.

Also all my nose hair fell out. For the record, no one appreciate the amount of work nose hair does. Gnats flew up my nose on three separate occasions. SB: I am in hell.

I also had a permanent low-level nasal drip.

SB: All these years and I had no idea how much wicking action those little hairs were doing. 

Note: Nose hair is the unsung hero of the human body.

63

This background looks a bit like a light orange rocky shore with a dark orange sea washing up on it, in abstract. 

My eyebrows finally gave up the ghost. They lasted four months. It was a good run.

SB: See you next year, guys. 

The taxol made my heart rate spike if I tried to do anything excessively athletic, such as standing up or walking across a room. People who walk regularly have better outcomes. I think that may be because if you can walk, you’re doing better anyway, but I did a slow half-kilometer circuit of my local park four days a week just in case. I played Pokémon Go a lot. 

SB: To think that I once considered myself woefully out of shape…

Note: Heart rate increase is ALSO a known side-effect.

64

Purple swirly background.

After every infusion, they cleaned my port with something that filled my nose with the smell of industrial cleaner. One day I encountered the smell in the wild.

SB: This is deeply unsettling and I don’t know why? I get that smells are really primal, but I’m not this upset during chemo!

A friend finally explained it to me….

Friend: It has nothing to do with being upset. Your body knows that smell comes with horrible physical disruption. On a very primitive level, your cells are screaming ��That was poison! Don’t eat it again!”

Note: Apparently the mechanism is that the cleaner goes into your blood, blood goes immediately to your lungs, the cleaner aerosolizes there and floods your nasal passages. For me, it was like Dire Windex.

65

Pale yellow background with small lime green spatter. 

Unfortunately, knowing why didn’t make it stop. I could actually feel the trigger sinking into my brain. 

SB: But if I know why it’s happening, I should be able to prevent it from getting lodged in there, dammit!

It turns out that understanding the mechanism of trauma doesn’t actually fix it. 

SB: Reality is not well-organized. 

66

Gray background with unusual swirls of light and dark gray, but shot through with watery red. The effect is like drips of blood in a tray of ice chunks. 

Despite the ice, I started to get neuropathy anyway. 

It was worst in my right food, which weirded me out. SB: Why isn’t it symmetrical? 

RN: It usually isn’t. 

SB: It feels like it should be. 

Eventually it felt like permanent pins-and-needles in both feet. 

SB: Oh, I am really not a fan of this.

But at least it wasn’t my hands. 

67

Shades of brown show through with lines of gold, like a dark rocky cliff face. 

Doctor pinkeye was paranoid about typing becoming painful, so we lowered the dose. 

DR: I used to work in a town with a lot of musicians. Hand neuropathy was their greeted nightmare. As God is my witness, you will be able to keep writing books. 

SB: Oh good. I’m not actually cut out for anything else. 

A friend sent me socks that said “Fuck Cancer” on the soles. I wore them proudly to chemo. A month later I realized that I put them on the wrong feet every time and had been proclaiming myself a “cancer fuck.” 

(Mind you, the nurses probably thought it was funny.)

Tune in next time, when we finish chemo at long last!

The Saga of Bob! Part 7, I think!

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6

When last we checked in, Tumor-Bob had shrunk considerably!

Apparently this is a rare but known side-effect. Figures. Weirdly, still not as annoying as the ice mittens.

Nose hair is the unsung hero of the human body.

Heart rate increase is ALSO a known side-effect.

Apparently the mechanism is that the cleaner goes into your blood, blood goes immediately to your lungs, the cleaner aerosolizes there and floods your nasal passages. For me, it was like Dire Windex.

(Mind you, the nurses probably thought it was funny.)

Tune in next time, when we finish chemo at long last!

[cityfolksandtheirflyingmachine]

My husband and I just had a conversation about 30 mins ago before bedtime about what we would do with our money if we were rich and had all the time in the world.

We didn't even specify how much money we were making or how much there was there for us to use.

I said something about topping up my ezlink card @ $500 and buying 2 metres shawls to replace my current ones. Buying 7 pairs of hand socks of the same colour. Purchasing maybe another 3 pairs of socks of the same colour.

Sponsoring a bunch of students from institutions of my choice. Remaining anonymous and never wanting to know the very people who'd benefit from it-- like, I would never want to meet the students or their parents. Maybe I might want to know their names but I don't ever want to meet them in person because I don't want to feel even an ounce of arrogance. I'd probably ask them to keep us in their prayers and that would be all for me. I don't want to get to know them at all for anonymous sake.

Maybe secretly transfer $50k into my grandmother's account for the fun of it and giving my retired father $2k or 3k a month with $500 allowance money. Maybe even give him $500k, a fully paid mini cooper for him to drive around. A new belt. Paid subscriptions of YouTube, newspapers to be delivered to his home, Spotify, Netflix, Google- you name it.

Getting that old stove replaced. Maybe fix the old sink faucet that's been faulty for God knows how many years. Maybe even a new microwave and a new fridge. Oh, maybe a motorcycle just for fun.

Maybe I'd like to buy all the necessary accessories for Nintendo Switch and games that I've been wanting to purchase on discount. I might want to get myself 2x GameBoy and buy the original Pokémon Red, Blue and Yellow so that I can trade.

My husband says he wants to fly to Madinah and stay there for a while. I respect that. I'd join him and probably stay there for a month or 3 months. Maybe rent a space or stay at Dallah Taiba.

I told him I'd still want to take taxis and wouldn't want to buy a car because I've got no license (yet) hahaha. I'd buy maybe a reasonably practical fancy car for my spouse. Maybe a Tesla? Haha. I'm not so good with brands.

Hmm what else would I want to spend on? Maybe getting the desktop motherboard fixed? I could buy a PS5 but I know I won't play it. It would make my spouse happy but I know I wouldn't have the time to play it. Maybe I shouldn't get it? Hmm.

I'd make anonymous donations everywhere insyaallah. Travelling to countries to meet children and families affected by man made disasters (like war, genocide, apartheid, ethnic cleansing) and natural disasters.

Maybe I might make daily/monthly GIRO donations to mosques both locally and internationally. I won't get an iPad tho hahaha. I might want to get myself a sleek laptop but..... I'm happier with a desktop.

Perhaps a new bed frame that we need haha. I can't think of anything else to spend money on from my end but I would like to settle things that need to be settled first.

It's funny talking about this because, the imaginary situation is that I'm filthy rich but still taking public transport? Still wanting to wear my existing clothes and sleep on the same mattress that's been passed down to us. Maybe I do not have the desire to spend on that? Idk.

Or because it is imaginary & we do not physically see the money.

Good talk!

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

Hello! I only recently found your blog and after much back and forth with myself decided to send this ask.

Trigger Warning for CSA and ED.

I suppose I'm looking for advice, a third party's thoughts? Also to get it off my chest.

I apologize in advance if this it too much for anyone reading, I know i still struggle to make heads or tails with it.

i had this epiphany a few years back, just before covid hit and as I had just moved into my own place for the first time. Ever since I was a little girl I've always had these unexplainable to my older self weird thoughts about sex.

During this epiphany I realized that my entire life, as long as I can remember-since approximately 5 to 6 years old - I have had rape fantasies. With myself as the victim. Very explicit, very violent just.. all around bad.

It had always troubled me but it had never been registered as something that needed more thought. It was more of a "Huh, you sure were quirky growing up!".

So during this epiphany it clicked to me: how could a child, from a good family, not suffocated, neither sheltered but raised by good folk, even KNOW not only what sex is, but also what rape is? Those thoughts dont come about naturally while watching Pokémon or Catdog.

So I started looking back. I really tried to make myself think.

I made myself picture little be getting abused. At first i suspected the men in my family. Uncle, grandad, even my dad.

It didn't click. Except when i thought about my grandad. At noons we used to sleep together. He'd read to me and it'd be our down time.

But it wasn't HIM who was triggering me ( God knows I'd die for that man i love him so much). It was his bedroom and his bed.

I realized suddenly that it wasn't a man that made me feel so.. uncomfortable? Like.. vomiting? Like.. these thoughts gave me this profound sense of doom and melancholy? I can't explain it.

But the person who came up was my cousin. She was only a few years older than me and she'd also live with our grandparents (their houses were in the same building).

I realized that when i was around 5 she would make me watch porn. The first time i ever watched it it was a traumatizing thing i realize. Not only did my body not know how to respond at this young age (it did get a reaction out of me which makes me feel fifty different types of sick) but I was shocked by the image of this man's penis. That night when i slept with my mum I couldn't sleep because i feared I'd see his thing in my dream and that my mum would know I'd done something bad! I'd blurt it out while dreaming! It was horrible.

A few days next mum took us shopping. While alone in the dressing room I had a sort of... Idk.. attack? Meltdown? She had given me to try on this faux leather skirt and I just got so enraged by it! I started angry crying and iirc hitting myself (?) Only now do i realise it was because the woman in the video was wearing a leather skirt.

My cousin also had this "massage wand" which for the life of me idk if it was a legit vibrator of my aunt or indeed a massage tool. But i remember her laying on her bed with her legs open (still dressed) and the thing between her legs. (When i told my bestie about this she tried to make me understand that she was indeed masturbating but God even writing this now it feels fake. It feels like an overreaction!)

My cousin would also make us play Husband and Wife. She'd be the husband first. She'd get on top of me and just stroke my arms, or act like she was kissing me. Sometimes she'd make me put a pillow on top of me and hug it like it was my husband.

But the worst was when she'd make ME be the husband. Id have to..idk how to describe it. I'd have to be active? I'd have to move my hips and talk and just be on top. We were clothed we weren't doing anything. But by God I just feel it in my bones This is why I have body dysmorphia. This is why my disordered eating started. This is why now I have trouble feeling feminine and just the thought of a single masculine characteristic on me sends me spiraling. I hate the idea of having anything masculine on me or being described as such! It makes me feel like back then.

Even now typing all this out.. I can't believe it. What if I'm misremembering? What if I'm the one creating false memories? What if I'm doing it for attention? Whose attention you'll ask since only now did i find the courage to tell SOLELY my best friend. Well, I'll say... I don't know.

I cannot connect the image of my childhood, happy as it was, because it was! I was loved and still am by my parents. My entire extended family are learned, progressive, loving people. I always felt like i got the lottery with my folks. I cannot make this make sense while adding my realizations into the mix.

I like my cousin! I even love her! We are close (considering we have our own thing happening in life). She is my family, my blood! She feels the same.

I dont know what to feel.

And I've also heard that children who are perpetrators of CSA (not only when they're so young do they Not mean any harm bc they're kids too) but also they had to learn all that from somewhere, from someone!

So.. did she also suffer? Do I need to start having suspicions about others hurting her?

Does she need help? Does she even remember?

I cannot tell anyone. It would ruin our family and my parents would be devastated. My mum she.... She'd legit lose her mind to learn that someone had hurt me this way!

Do you guys have any thoughts? Am i crazy? Am i making it up? Am i creating the memories? God knows it affects me in all aspects of life so.. there has to be Something there, right?!

Feel free to post this as a post for your followers to answer too. Im okay with it.

Just typing it out was cathartic.

I'm sorry to anyone burdened with reading something so light-hearted. And thank you for taking the time to read and answer.

I hope whoever it is on the other side reading has a good day. And Thank You.

-Bess

p.s.

Because I get very illogically anxious very often, if by any chance my eyes are deceiving me, or tumblr crashes or whatever and by accident this post doesn't get submitted Anonymously (as I intend it to) could you please refrain from posting it? I would really thank you for that!

Okay bye now! And Thank You again for the help 💙

Hi Bess,

I'm so sorry about what you've been through. Please know that you're not alone.

It's incredibly difficult to navigate some potential early childhood trauma. It sounds like you probably aren't making this up because you seem to be able to identify what doesn't click or make sense. Often, trauma tends to have strong emotional or visceral responses, like you described, nausea and discomfort. These feelings suggest that the memories could be authentic.

it's hard to accept that you've been through trauma because of its implications, and that's understandable, but it's also important for your healing to work through the process of grief at your own pace. Also please know that just because you may have otherwise had a good childhood with a strong support network around you, doesn't mean that you couldn't have been traumatized or that your trauma isn't valid.

You are right that COCSA perpetrators tend to be CSA survivors themselves, because their behavior is, in some way, learned from elsewhere. But please remember that this does not excuse perpetuating that abusive behavior. Regardless of what may have happened to your perpetrator, it doesn't change the fact that they hurt you.

It's your story so it's up to you who to tell or not tell, but just know that other peoples emotions are not your responsibility, so if someone is devastated to hear what happened, that is not your fault. Additionally, it's worth considering that you are not to blame for telling your truth, rather your cousin is to blame for their actions that you are merely conveying.

Ultimately, it's important to make sure that you can get any help you need during this time, in terms of exploring trauma and maintaining your mental health. If you can access or afford it, a mental health professional such as a therapist can help you process your traumas, the feelings and questions surrounding them, and develop ways to cope and move forward with these memories.

Please remember that you are not crazy, and know that we believe you. If anyone has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[smallestapplin]

I let you pick the characters for this because honestly I love your take on all of those characters: Character reacting to Reader proposing to them? I need some fluff pls

I’m picking the more dramatic mfs, also I did something similar on Ro’s blog but I forgot to sign it so theres that.

Asks are open!

-

-

🐉Raihan🐉

- You have played him for a fool!

- This tall man is absolutely losing it.

- First it was a nice date, not a super fancy one. Just a playful one you two went to a carnival that was in town and had a blast!

- He won you so many prizes after finishing all the rides of course, and the fair food was amazing!

- Raihan captured every moment he possible could.

- You have been dating for three years now and it’s the best thing to have ever happened to him.

- Or so he thought.

- You two ended taking the long way home, deciding walking would be better.

- Your prizes stuffed into a bag that he also won you.

- Raihan was carrying a few prizes that you won him rambling on about the plushies names and giving them silly backstories and personalities.

- “Hey Raihan?”

- “Yeah babe?”

- “Can we take a break here for a bit?” And he agreed.

- Placing the prizes on the bench next to him along with yours. Smiling happily making sure his new children were fine.

- It’s a nice park, the trees branches fall perfectly here he notes, almost cocooning, you two here away from the rest of Galar, he stares up at them thinking.

- “Raihan, I hope you know these last three years have been the best of my life.”

- He flashes you a toothy grin “same here.”

- “The longer in with you the more in love I fall for you.”

- Now he is suspicious. Tilting his head down he takes a sharp inhale.

- He isn’t a traditional man, but seeing you kneeling in front of him with a personalized ring bout turned him into a house husband.

- “I want nothing more than to spend many more with you, if you’d let me, marry me?”

- You think you almost went deaf from the screech he gave, tackling you to the ground smothering you in so many kisses.

- “YES YES YES YES YES!! OH MY ARCEUS YES!”

- He slips the ring on and he is spamming all his social media’s with pictures and him screaming about this.

- Oh he is mentioning it ALL the time now.

- Leon winning a match against him again? “At least I’m getting married unlike you, loser.” Playfully of course.

- “Me and my fiancé frequent that café all the time.”

- Anytime in his everyday life he will let everyone know.

- Raihan is definitely printing fliers that say “have you seen my fiancé? They aren’t missing or anything I just really love them and thought you should see their greatness.”

🔳Emmet🔳

- He likes to think he isn’t as loud as his brother.

- He is wrong.

- Emmet had taken off work, not for any particular reason he just wanted to spend some time with you, so he took the week off.

- That’s what he tells you.

- In reality for some reason Ingo forced him to.

- Weird but whatever, Emmet is more than happy to spend quality time with you!

- Two years of dating you and two years of growth he absolutely believes he found the one.

- Today was a normal day, you suggested a picnic and he loved the idea! So just before the sun was to set you two packed everything and left for a park.

- You both picked a secluded part where it could just be the two of you. Releasing your respective Pokémon so they can run around and have fun, you two ate and laughed, sharing stories of the week or jokes.

- Emmet felt so content, this is what he wants, if he could stay in this moment forever he would.

- “Emmet?”

- The subway boss is instantly on alert, you rarely call him by his name, it’s always a nickname or pet name.

- “Yes darling?”

- You gaze at him, eyes filled with love. He looks away giggling as he blushes.

- “I love you so much, you’re perfect in every way, you’re everything I could want and more.”

- “Oh darling!” He covers his face trying to hide his flustered expression.

- “I mean it! You’re the love of my life, I want you by my side, always…so.”

- When he doesn’t hear you continue. Just the sound of fabric moving, he lowers his hands, the air leaves his body.

- On your knees at his side with a beautiful white and black ring.

- “I love you, I fall in love all over again just being with you, I want to spend the rest of my days like that with you, please Emmet, marry me?”

- The second the two words left your lips he screams the most joyous scream, tears are running down his face. Nodding frantically he lets you put the ring on his finger before he yanks you and pulls you into his chest.

- “Darling! My sweet darling! Yes! Nothing would make me happier than to be your husband!”

- You cannot stop him from showing off that ring.

- He does exaggerate things with that hand specifically JUST so people will see it and ask.

- When he tells any of his friends or family he is holding that hand out showing it off and gushing about it.

- Some poor sap asked him about that ring and Emmet pulls out a whole out wedding planner like “oh so glad you asked, so me and my fiancé were thinking-“

- Ingo literally has to drag Emmet away from people cause he won’t stop talking about it.

- At home he is the softest things.

- Just laying his head in your lap, looking up at you while you run your fingers through his hair.

- “Can you say it again? Please?”

- Chuckling you do as asked “I can’t wait to marry you, Emmet.”

- “The other one.”

- “You’re my fiancé, Emmet.”

- Laughing when he squeals and hugs your waist.

- He never gets tired of hearing it.

🐬Wallace🐬

- oh this extravagant man was already thinking about it.

- You’ve been with him for many years, through thick, thin, and damn near the end of the world.

- You’re the perfect balance to his calm and graceful personality. You make him feel like a kid again.

- He had already spoken to his dear friend Steven about a ring and got one for you, he was still thinking about a matching one for himself, but he couldn’t place it.

- He booked you both a private reservation at a high end restaurant.

- While you were thinking of something less over the top. You laugh at thinking you could have anything simple with him.

- To you he is like a peacock in human form.

- You thought it was just because he wanted to have date night.

- Which is partially correct.

- The evening was going great, laughing and sharing a bottle of wine. The wait staff was so polite and kind but made sure to not stick around for long.

- Leaving just you and your boyfriend of five years.

- Alone.

- You’re both almost finished with dinner anyways.

- So you thought it would be nice.

- “Wallace?”

- “Mm? Yes dearest?”

- “I love you.”

- He laughs softly “my, I love you too, truly you are my light.”

- “And you the holder of my heart, I don’t think I’ve ever felt so much joy and love in my life, you bring so much light into my life, like the moon reflecting off a calm night at sea.”

- Wallace smiles, his heart is pounding against his rib cage. You’re so sweet to him.

- You reach into your pocket. His light blue eyes widen.

- “Dearest.”

- You pause “yeah?”

- “Are….are you about to propose to me?”

- The look of heart break on your face makes him panic

- “No no it’s not bad! It’s just.” He reaches into his own pocket and pulls out a small black box, opening it to reveal and ring.

- You stare and pull out your own little black box, opening it to reveal a white and teal ring accented with small purple gems.

- It matched him and the ring he bought perfectly.

- Wallace leans back in his chair laughing. His laugh echoing loudly.

- “Oh hush.” You chuckle.

- “I-I just can’t believe we had the same idea!”

- You two slip the rings on. The gym leader just admires it and you.

- “Dearest come here, I want to hold you.”

- He has you across his lap. Placing soft kisses everywhere he can reach.

- Steven, the elite four, and the gym leaders NEVER hear the end of it.

- He keeps it away from the media for a while cause he just wants to bask in these moments.

- Can, will, and has told the ‘we proposed at the same time’ story every time he talks to someone.

- You can hear Steven sigh from the kitchen “Wallace, you have told me this story eleven times now, I GET IT.”

[r0-boat]

Hiii I love your blog! I was wondering if I could get some fluffy and/or nsfw for a gn reader and werewolf Kukui? Thank you!!

I'm losing my mind and I have a billion ideas in my head. Here is wholesome werewolf Kukui

Your fiance has always been the type to wear his heart on his sleeve, even if he tried he knew he could never keep secrets from you.

Your fiance let out a playful growl as he played with the Pokemon in his were-lycanroc form, bouncing and gently nudging at the Pokemon as a way to let their energy out

You couldn't help but smile remembering that faithful day.

It was when the two of you were getting serious about a year into your relationship. Even though the two of you saw and texted each other regularly, you couldn't really make a lot of time for yourself. You didn't particularly mind Kukui was a very busy man with his research. But it was the strange hours he was available around Dawn and dusk, even at night, when you suggest going to Melemele Meadow for lunch, possibly to watch the wild Cutiefly, he declined.

Now all you could do was run your hand down his's back while he lays in the warm sun.

Kukui knew he could never hurt you, we just didn't know what you would think,

If he was a normal werewolf it would have been easier to hide changing at night.

But his species was special, only changing when the Sun was at its strongest. He was afraid that you would see his form and run, call him a beast and never see him again. He took you to the beach at dawn, and as the Cutiefly fluttered and played, the Sun triggered his transformation.

Your eyes widened as you took your hand to then touched his face. Kukui put his hand on your smiling. His tail can help, but Wag, when he realized it, he found the one.

Of course, your Pokemon adored him; he understood them and even played like them.

Kukui couldn't do normal moves like a lycanroc could, but he could definitely take attacks. If you thought he was Reckless before, Oh Boy.

As much as you agree with him being with the Pokemon in his field research and using his form to be closer.

No, Dear, just because you're a rock type, that doesn't mean you can take a fire blast...

Please why can't you to just study like a safe person so... oh no, honey, not the puppy dog eyes!

You folded quickly.

And after a tiring day of field research, your husband would drag himself back to the lab now in his human form, his lab coat now with burn marks and scratches as he pulls you into a hug and kiss.

The two of you spend the rest of the evening watching Pokémon documentaries and cuddling.