#I had a potentially really important and much needed opportunity come up
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#I hate this#I had a potentially really important and much needed opportunity come up#and literally the only thing stopping me is being poor#too poor to get a loan lol#best case scenario right now#aside from suddenly coming into money#would be that it doesn’t work out on their end and we can try again next year#otherwise I have to try to figure it out#Via’s long illness completely wiped me out financially and put me further back than I’ve been in years#and the world just keeps getting more expensive with no reprieve
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Hello :) I really enjoy reading your analysis on AAA!
What conversations do you think Agatha and Rio had between “because the truth is too awful “ and “what Billy wants is a violation”?
The shift between topics was so abrupt. What would they talk about to make Agatha want to make a deal to never see Rio again?
Hello Anon! Thank you for reading 💚 Okay so I think there's 2 parts to your question here, which is (a) why the change in topics between the conversation and (b) how it leads up to Agatha's deal.
Let's take a step back a bit. If we look at the first conversation, it already starts out about the Problem of Billy right?
And the whole Billy issue only exists in the context of what happened with Nicky. If Nicky had never been a thing, Agatha and Rio and their dynamic would be entirely different. Nicky was the breaking point of their relationship – a relationship with love and lust but also wrapped up in their opposing natures.
The conversation quickly escalates, shifting from Billy to their history and relationship. Rio, direct as ever, airs what must be a long-long-simmering grievance:
Rio: No one in history has had special treatment like you. Agatha: You call what you did "special treatment"? You gave me nothing. You took. Rio: And that's usually your move right.
Now the anger and frustration is starting to boil and Agatha tries to push past and get away from Rio – but Rio stops her and tries to deescalate this argument.
In other words – and to address your ask – the topic shifts because Rio is trying to have a conversation and not fight. Rio knows that Nicky is Agatha's deepest scar, and Agatha is a runner when she doesn't have control.
You can see Rio taking a second, watching Agatha, her tone softening as she asks the question:
Why do you let them believe those things about you, hm? About Nicky?
I think Rio tries to deescalate because she does need Agatha's help with the Billy situation: she can't kill him or reap his soul on her own. It's not a thing Rio is happy about or wants but she's got a job to do.
BUT in this show things are usually complicated: more than one thing can be true at the same time: I think Rio also cares about Agatha and wants to understand why.
After all it was Rio who told the group in episode 5 that Agatha killed her original coven because they tried killing her first. Agatha doesn't bother defending herself, if anything she plays up being this villain.
I mean, Rio loves this serial killer right. It's not the murder part of Agatha's reputation Rio cares about. Rio also has the unique insight of knowing exactly what happened to Nicky. This rumour that Agatha doesn't do anything to discourage seems to not only be an insult to Agatha but the memory of Nicky.
And then in a rare moment of vulnerability, Agatha decides to reveal her truth to Rio.
Because the truth is too awful
I read this moment as Rio trying to reach out and Agatha deciding to give an honest answer. Which again, is a precious rare thing coming from her.
I don’t think any transitional dialogue from this to the other conversation is really important, not as much as the emotional place this first conversation ends with, which allows for the second one about a potential collaboration to happen.
Also like, what do you say to something like that? Because wow there is a lot to unpack there.
Agatha’s implying that what Rio gave her and Nicky is worse than her sacrificing Nicky for power. That she isn’t trying to be cruel, she truly can’t see the gift of time Rio gave them. That she sees herself somehow responsible for what happened to Nicky. That she doesn’t just blame Rio, she blames herself.
If I had to plot out some kind of transition between these two conversations, I would do something like:
Let the silence after the admission drag on a bit. Rio looks concerned but doesn't say anything in the moment.
Agatha takes the opportunity to walk away. Rio doesn't stop her but follows. Agatha lets her.
After a moment of quiet walking, Agatha asks about when Rio knew about the Road hex and they compare notes for a bit (Rio probably throwing shade at the weird nature here). This time lets Agatha build up her walls again.
They sit down and talk about the point of the hex, which then nicely leads into their second conversation, starting with what Billy wants.
In their second conversation, what's interesting here how very reluctant Rio is about asking for Agatha's help. She knows Agatha and hates being in this position so much she doesn't even want to say it, letting Agatha piece together what she needs.
It must truly be a rare instance that Agatha has this kind of leverage over Rio, over Death.
Because Agatha reacts like a shark scenting blood in the water. She barely hides it.
This goes back to your question: Why does Agatha make such an deal that hurts Rio so badly?
My read is that Agatha basically reacts to this rush of power over Rio the same way she badly – almost instinctively – reacted to Alice presenting her with her magic:
She takes and takes and takes.
Because Rio's always been unstoppable but now Agatha can stop her. This is what's she's been hungering for.
That sense of helplessness she felt moments ago when she thought she had to let Billy go – like she let Nicky go – now turns to something with teeth.
You can see Agatha literally take a second to calculate the most cruel thing she can say to Rio to hurt her, to deny and reject her love.
Now that's the emotional side of things. On a more logical level, Agatha goes into scheming mode. This is like muscle memory for her at this point, she won't deny an opportunity to get ahead.
So she doesn't deny Rio's ask. She makes the price of her handing over Billy so awful to Rio it has maybe a chance of stopping her from her mission, or buying more time at least. For so much of her life Agatha has justified murder and lies and the worst behaviour with the need to survive and protect what's hers.
Once again: Calculated move, bad at math.
Because Rio accepts the deal. She's so wounded she doesn't even push back even a little. She reacts so badly to Agatha's rejection, to her taking advantage of this opportunity, that she gives into being the villain Agatha sees her as.
#agatha all along#agathario#agatha harkness#rio vidal#tv: agatha all along#ship: vidarkness#thanks for inspiring me look at these painful conversations again and again i guess???#apologies if the post is annoyingly long#for some reason the Read More function keeps messing up the post images and moving around#fuckin dumpster fire of an app#anon#asks#aaa meta
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Out of all the links that don't really like humans, how would they react if they found out their soulmate was a human? Would any of them try to deny it, or would they try to learn to accept it and move past their dislike for humans for their soulmates sake? The idea of a hylian that hates humans, and a human that doesn't trust hylians very much because of their obvious dislike of humans, going through enemies to lovers is so interesting to me. And it has the potential for some hilarious moments I think 😆
You. You get the potential.
Warrior, Legend, Hyrule and Four are the ones that are the most "skeptical", to put it nicely. Time is a pure middle ground.
Time would likely need little convincing but he's incredibly apathetic, not wanting to get too close for personal reasons. I mean he's had to say goodbye to everyone who was ever important to him. It's not even about Reader being human. His issues are more about being soulmates tbh.
Four is the runner up. His soulmate would need to put in a little work (whether they know it or not), but it'll be fairly easy to get past his defenses afterward. Humans, with the superior weaponry and craftmanship, would be able to garner the respect and admiration of the blacksmith once they start talking shop. All Four needs is a little time to get used to the idea and eventually grow to not care about what they are and begin to care about who they are.
Legend is all snark and attitude and it'll take something literally hitting him in the head to get him to consider Reader as potential. It sound like I'm trying to be metaphorical. Nah. Legend is gonna have to be in a life or death situation where Reader save his hide before he's going to admit to anything, let alone start to open up to them.
Hyrule is worse believe it or not. He won't be snarky, but he'll avoid Reader like the plague purely on principle. It's not even actively being disrespectful, he's just got Reader on the peripheral if they ever decide to act up. He's got zero reason to trust them and doesn't want to give them any opportunity to prove him right. He'll be civil.... on good days. But good luck getting him to even look in Reader's direction. And add soulmates on top of that? Hyrule is gonna just ignore it all together. Because- no. It can't be. He refuses. And if he believes hard enough, maybe it'll manifest into reality.
Warrior takes the cakes. Good luck, Reader. You'll need all the help you can get. Fervently thinks of Reader as an enemy even if they have never met before that. In fact, being his soulmate makes him hate them more. Because of course they are his soulmate. Just his luck. Surrounded by traitors and sketchy people just like before. Now, we know he has no reason to think this way, but he's not afraid of voicing his "distaste", for the lack of better words. He's like Legend in which he's going to need a life or death situation for Reader to gain his respect. and he's like Hyrule in which he'll avoid Reader at all costs. But to be his soulmate? He's gonna need even more time than Four. He's got ideas and they run deep. You'll the patience and determination of Frisk from Undertale just to even remotely be considered on good terms with this guy. Of course, there's potential for him to come around- just like all the other boys. But he's quite literally worse case scenario.
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Hey Lissie! Another Hamilton 5+1 for you because I love the format, hehe. Straight to the point, here it is:
5 times Y/N woke up without Lewis and one time they woke up together.
I can definitely see a potential for angst and a bit of misunderstanding or yearning?! Lewis can either be a f1 driver or have it as an AU with another job! The prompt needs a good reason of “why” for the absence and I am more than certain your mind will come up with a brilliant answer. I am thrilled and again, have fun!
𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐘𝐨𝐮
Lissie note… I love this prompt so much ugh!!! I changed it a slight bit to falling asleep rather than waking up (just for dramatic effect). Thank you for the prompt, love<3
Things to note
Reader is a paralegal
Lewis is frequently gone for races
They’ve been dating for 4~5 years and live together
There is a tiny age gap but it isn’t that bad
Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x gf!reader
Warnings: Slight angst???
Word Count: 5.3k+
Playlist recommendations: 𝐋𝐇𝟒𝟒, 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭💔, 𝐅𝐥����𝐟𝐟💗
Taglist: @allwaysalleyway, @drugged-kitkat, @darleneslane, @littlesatanicassholebitch
His arms were warm. They were comforting to lie in and snuggle into. He trailed his fingers gently through your hair, as you slowly dozed off.
That was a dream.
The cruel reality of the real world, in the form of an obnoxious iPhone alarm, woke you up. It was already 6 AM, and your routine consisted of a hefty amount of self-care. This meant that you had about 10 minutes for a shower, 50 for hair care, and 30 for skin and makeup. Breakfast was out of the question. So much for self-care.
Before you left, you made sure to feed Roscoe and give him his well-deserved cuddles. Things had been hard ever since Coco passed, but Roscoe was still a happy spirit.
You went to the garage, noticing your boyfriend’s all too famous purple Mercedes. Your heart stung for a second, but you brushed it off. It was important to support his endeavours, instead of sulking about him.
You decided to go with your vintage beetle. Driving around in it was what kept you grounded. You’d gotten it for your 18th birthday from your parents. Not from your lover.
The fact that you didn’t quit your 9-5 paralegal job was also rationalizing, you didn’t stay home and leech off of your rich man. He was more than just a wallet. He was your partner. Besides, the media had already started to suspect that he wasn’t single anymore. Though he hadn’t been for years. The two of you had met coincidentally over a cup of tea with your boss. Lewis was his client and you were the first to oversee the situation before handing him off. That was about 6 years ago. For four, the two of you had been together. You had only given him your number regarding his case, but he’d taken the opportunity to ask you out.
Now, the two of you lived together in a mansion overseeing a large forest. It was quite far from your workplace, but you didn’t really mind. Having to wake up early was a small price to pay for the tranquillity of the surroundings. Although it would’ve been more tranquil, had you had more time with your lover.
Alas, there was nothing you could do about it.
1 | Shades Of Cool
You sat there on your dreary chair in your dreary office. The white walls hypnotized you into thinking time was going much slower than it actually was. You stared away at it for a while, before someone knocked on your door.
“Hey, can you please do these briefs? I need to clock out for a dentist’s appointment in a few minutes. I promise I’ll owe you.” You accepted the pile and started going at it. Work usually made you forget the empty feeling of not seeing him often. Sometimes you even thought of staying all night. However, for Roscoe’s sake, you never stayed past dinner time. He couldn’t be alone for too long. It wasn’t fair to the poor boy.
It took hours and hours to get through the pile. You clocked out well past midnight and stopped by a pub to pick up some food before driving home. You knew a huge “sorry” was in order for your dog. He hadn’t seen you for several hours, definitely missing you.
You had 12 missed calls from him. Even though he was on an entirely different continent, he somehow found the time to call you. 12 times no less. You decided to call him back after finishing your dinner and making yourself comfortable next to Roscoe on your sofa.
“Hello, love.” You heard from the other end of the line, as he turned his camera on. There he was. His exhausted, but beautiful face. His hair wasn’t tied up. It was relaxed and so was he.
“Hey, Lewis,” you said and turned on your camera, showing yourself next to his beloved dog,
“Roscoe’s here too.” He let out a huff, which stirred a chuckle out of your boyfriend.
“How’s work? How are you doing?” He asked, knowing that you dreaded most of your coworkers if not all. Additionally, he knew that every day was the same at the office. You handled briefs and got files in piles by your superiors. It sucked.
“It’s okay… same old same old. How’s Spain?” You were so used to staying in the UK, you’d forgotten what it was like to travel. As a paralegal, you didn’t have the luxury to do so that often.
“It’s great. Did you see the videos I sent you? This car is incredible, darling.” You hadn’t seen them for one very specific reason; your heart would clench. It would simply give out at the sight of your boyfriend. Missing him was always a big problem, but with races being back-to-back… it hurt that much more.
“I haven’t had the chance to yet, no, but I’ll check them out later.” The hesitation in your voice must’ve been apparent, as he decided to ask into it,
“Something wrong?” You didn’t want to worry him, so you told a little white lie. You were simply just tired. That was it. That was all. Knowing him, he’d worry too much to focus on driving, which was the exact opposite of what you wanted for him. Besides, it’d be selfish of you to make his work all about yourself. Gosh, you really couldn’t stand your obsessive thoughts.
“Well, I promised Valterri I’d meet him at the gym. Sleep well, darling.” You blew him a kiss goodbye before shutting off the feed and turning over. Roscoe huffed and curled up beside you. It was dead silent except for the few wind rustles you heard from the open window next to the TV. It didn’t feel tranquil. No, you were lamenting the thought of being alone for so long. You hated it. It wasn’t an issue during the day. You had chores and you had work to do, but in the evenings when everything always gets quieter— your mind gets louder.
Roscoe was sleeping soundly next to you. Your hand stroked him gently whilst you scrolled through your Instagram feed. Naturally, you ended up on Lewis’ page. He was highly selective of who he was following. You, however, were amongst the few that he did. A smile spread across your face like room-temperature butter would be spread on a piece of bread. You didn’t appear much on his feed, as you liked being private. Though the posts you did appear in, all had captions with romantic undertones. You really were in love with that man.
I can’t break through your world, ‘cause you live in shades of cool…
2 | Sad Girl
The sun had already come to greet you. It was an early Saturday morning, which would’ve been peaceful— had you not forgotten about the LSATs. You woke up on the sofa that you’d passed out on the night before. Dried drool decorated the corner of your lip. What time was it? You checked your phone, only to realize that your battery was low and the test was in an hour. The sudden sound of your phone ringing sent you scrambling to answer it.
“Hey, are you on your way? I studied all night… Hopefully, we can do this.” Your friend, who usually sat in the cubicle opposite you, whined. She wasn’t a strong test taker, based on the fact that it was her 5th time taking the LSATs. 7 and she’d be all done. No more chances. In comparison to her, you were going in for the first time. You’d studied, but you had no idea how the whole thing would turn out. The tests only got harder and harder every year.
“I am, I am. The traffic is just insane at the moment. I’ll see you there.” You hung up and swiftly ran around the house to get ready. Roscoe was reasonably confused at the rush you were in. You kissed his wrinkly forehead before shutting the door behind you.
For nostalgic reasons, you decided to take Lewis’ purple Mercedes. It was the only one of its kind, so it’d make sense if some people recognized it. You didn’t care. It felt like Lewis was still with you, even if he was in an entirely different country. Speak of the devil, your phone buzzed. One message from him… “Good luck with the LSATs, darling”. Your heart clenched. You missed him so.
Traffic turned out to be light and breezy. Luckily, you made it in time for the test. Being a paralegal had its benefits, but it was and would always be a step below the real deal. You weren’t a real lawyer until you took the LSATs. Then, there was the deal with the bar exam as well. That was another story.
“Did you do good? I croaked. I’m toast. I’ll have to take it again…” said your defeated friend and munched down on her lunch that she brought.
“I don’t know. Maybe? I don’t really care at this point…” Of course, you did, but your mind was too occupied by the absence of your lover to hold an actual conversation. He expected you to tune in on his races whenever you had time to do so, but the fact of the matter was— you never could. It made your heart ache with longing. A painful longing for him to come back home. Especially on weeks when the race weekends were happening back-to-back.
“I guess you don’t need to worry. You’ve got your boyfriend’s money to take care of you.” Although you barely listen to all of her blabbering about the test, that particular thing got through to you.
“Excuse me?”
“Yeah. You’re literally dating a celebrity. You’re set,” she chuckled.
“Do you actually think you’re being funny right now?” She likely didn’t mean any harm, but with your pent-up agony and rage, it was hard not to let loose on her.
“Calm down, I was only kidding…” You’d made a scene. You were uncomfortable, things were awkward, and the only place your mind wandered to was Lewis.
“You know what, I’m sorry. I’m just really tired after the test. How about we catch up soon? I need to head home.” Your heart was pounding rapidly in your chest as you put the keys in the ignition. It almost felt as if you were an irrational teenager again. His absence did a number on you. It wasn’t always like that though. Throughout the previous season, he would always do whatever he could to see you in person. Whether it was bringing you with him, or flying back home. As the following season started, the two of you realized how unethical and harmful the solutions were to the environment. Coupled with the fact that you were trying to become a lawyer, there was no way to see him. No way to be held by him. No way to fall asleep in his arms.
That night, you stared into the ceiling for what felt like hours. The spot next to you was empty. Completely untouched. The sound of the gentle wind rustling the trees outside helped your brain work its wild imagination. Vivid pictures of Lewis played over and over and you couldn’t help but feel as though the two of you weren’t meant to be. You had conflicting schedules and you couldn’t just take a weekend off every week to go with him to his races. He couldn’t stay for your sake either. He had a job to do. A job that millions of people depended on for their entertainment. Were you an obstacle? All these thoughts drove into your heart like a stake. You wept. It was inevitable. You’d tried to not do so because you knew he wouldn’t want that… but it was hard. Too hard. Your vision was blurry and the sounds of the nature surrounding you were dimming slowly. You were falling asleep.
You haven’t seen my man…
3 | Off To The Races
Sunday morning was brutal. You woke up with a pounding headache due to having cried yourself to sleep. The sun made your situation much worse, blinding you as you tried to get out of bed. Upon checking your phone, you saw a slew of unread messages from your beau. All of them were minutes apart, making it clear that he’d been trying to reach you throughout the evening.
21:30- Hey, you’re not answering your phone, so I just wanted to text you instead. How are you?
21:55- Are you there? You’re usually not asleep at this hour…
22:45- I suppose you may be busy or asleep. In that case, sleep well baby❤️
22:46- Call me whenever you wake up
“Fuck,” you sighed and went to the bathroom. The reflection in the mirror seemed unfamiliar. You didn’t look like yourself at all. No, that wasn’t you. The face looking back at you had swollen eyes and redness coating the corners. Its mascara had been running and dried, giving the face a crustier look. It felt as if you were some little kid who couldn’t stand to be alone for the day, whilst their mother went out to buy groceries. It was embarrassing.
After feeding yourself and Roscoe, cleaning yourself up, and doing chores around the house— you decided that you’d turn on the TV to watch your boyfriend. You were too late for lights out, as they were on their 10th already. It didn’t matter though, for Lewis was in the lead. He had mentioned how good his car was, but you didn’t imagine a 20-second gap. It was pure insanity.
Finishing on top, he ran to embrace the team with a smile. The cameraman followed his every move, and as he did so; Lewis came up to him and stared directly into the lens.
“I love you,” he said. Your heart keeled over and you felt your tear ducts get to work again. It was impossible to watch the rest of the celebration. You shut it off and went to calm yourself down. Breathing heavily in front of the bathroom mirror made you feel like a fool. Love made you weak, but it was a good kind of weak whenever your darling was around.
After a hearty nap, you woke up to your phone buzzing itself off your nightstand.
“Hello?” Your voice was jagged and rough from just having woken up.
“Are you okay? You’re not sick, are you?” His voice was breathy and exhausted. Physically, he was obviously worse off than you.
“Hey, no-yeah, I’m okay. I saw you out there today. You did so great, Lew.” His nickname was one that he adored. The way it rolled off your tongue made his heart flutter with joy.
“I’m glad you saw it. Did you… see the celebration?” He was obviously referring to the message he left for the camera. Your heart pumped faster and faster with adrenaline.
“I-uh… I did…”
“So?”
“I love you too. You know I do.” So much so that it hurt that he wasn’t next to you with his arm around your neck. You wanted to lean against his shoulder as he read you stories that his mother used to read to him. Fuck, it hurt.
“When are you coming back?”
“We still have a few things to do here. Thursday? I’ll be home for two weekends after that.” It was better than nothing, though hearing him say it felt like a long time.
“I understand… I just hope you maybe miss me as much as I miss you?” Yeah, you stooped to that level. Your desperation was starting to reveal itself. Layer by layer.
“Are you insane? Not a second goes by without my thoughts being consumed by you. All I’ve ever thought of this weekend has been you. Staying safe for you, training hard for you, winning… for you.” For a moment, he almost sounded frustrated. But it was just a mask for how deeply he felt for you. The two of you sat in the same boat, rocking through the crashing tides of longing together. Each move was careful to not let the other drown.
“Are you crying?” He asked, careful not to step on any thorns.
“No…” you replied with a slight sniffle, signalling that you obviously were.
“It’s okay, I’m right here. I’ll be back home before you know it.” You wanted to hug him. You needed it so badly.
I’m your little scarlet, starlet, singin’ in the garden. Kiss me on my open mouth…
4 | Video Games
It was Monday, which meant that you could be distracted by your otherwise unforgiving job. Being a paralegal, your duties often consisted of briefs upon briefs which took up most of your 8 hours. You were crammed into a small cubicle with little to no space for any of your personal possessions. You’d hung a few pictures of Lewis and yourself and that was about it.
You stared into the dull computer screen, feeling the existential dread looming over you for every number you typed in. Your eyes were basically goo and the bags dragging them down were more apparent than ever. It would’ve been a pitiful sight for your coworkers if you weren’t surrounded by walls.
“Hey you, wanna grab lunch together? Same place as always. It’s on me this time… since I owe you.” Even an invite to free food wasn’t enough to fully pull you out of your trance. You slowly forced your sluggish head to turn and meet your friend’s. The look of horror etched onto her face was enough to let you know you needed to get outside.
“Sure… I guess.” You dragged your feet along the floor as you followed her to the elevator and outside.
“Is it Lewis again or shitty briefs?” She put in her sunglasses and led the way, locking her arm with yours to not look like she was dragging you against your will.
“Honestly? Both. I don’t get why I keep missing him this much, and I don’t get why some briefs suck that bad.” Lewis was one thing and briefs were more of a frustration. Nothing to cry over, really. You generally enjoyed what you did, so there was rarely anything to complain about. The job was cushy and allowed a lot of free time after hours. Team building exercises were scarce, but not to the point where conflicts arose every day. It was fine.
“We’ll have our usuals,” she said to the waitress.
“Look, you can’t control every aspect of your life. It’s meant to be unpredictable. Briefs suck sometimes, you’re going to feel bad about your boyfriend being gone— c’est la vie.” You knew she pulled that straight out of a podcast. At least the general gist of it.
“Whatever. I guess you’re right, that’s life.” You were just about to jump into a different topic when you heard Lewis’ ringtone from your purse.
“Sorry, I have to take this. I’ll be right back.” You scurried off to the restroom to take the call.
“Lewis? Why are you calling?” A bit harsh with his lack of context.
“Am I not allowed to call my girlfriend who, by the way, is very missed?” Just hearing his voice brought back the life that all those briefs drained you of.
“Of course you are… I’m just out for lunch right now.” You felt like a schoolgirl sneaking off to the bathroom to call your beau.
“Sorry, I forgot you usually do that. I was just checking in to say hi before I go in for a meeting.” His voice was so happy-go-lucky, it made you wonder if he missed you as much as you did him.
“… when are you coming back?” You heard a sigh on the other end,
“They’re keeping me here until Wednesday. I’m really sorry, babe.” Of course. It was as if they didn’t want him to go home. Whilst you supported his job and did whatever you could do to show it— you wanted nothing more than for him to stop everything and be with you.
“It’s okay, we can wait. You should focus on your stuff, okay? Good luck with the meeting, Lew.” Luckily, he wasn’t able to see your face. It didn’t match your uppity voice.
“Thanks. See you soon.”
“Bye.”
You left the bathroom and went back to the table where your friend had begun eating. You followed suit and got back to the office after you finished.
After hours, you stopped by a deli to grab a sandwich to eat for dinner. Roscoe greeted you at the door with a huff and followed you to the dining room. The entire house felt empty without your other part to fill it with joy.
That night was another filled with tears and running mascara.
Pull up in your fast car. Whistling my name…
5 | Go Go Dancer
Your depressive slump had faded after the realization that you only had to survive one more night without him. You decided to call in sick and cash in on a few hours for yourself. It was going to be a personal day. You needed to pamper yourself.
Your eyes were still bloodshot from all the crying, but your soul was cleansed of any negativity. Your favorite playlist was on and you began your day of treating yourself like royalty. All of your skincare was out on your vanity and Roscoe sat in the bed behind you. A warm bath was the first thing you did. Whilst flicking on a rom-com, you sat and soaked in the lavender-infused water. Thereafter, you retreated back to your bedroom. Your hair was up in rollers and your bathrobe clung tightly to your damp body.
Today was a day with no briefs, no worries, no salty bosses or annoying clients. You had all the time in the world for yourself. You ordered brunch and whilst you were waiting for it to arrive, you finished your skincare and makeup. After finding something to wear, you picked up the food from the awestruck delivery guy. He complimented your garden and your house. If there was one thing you enjoyed, it was gardening with Lewis. The two of you had worked tirelessly to make the front yard look perfect.
You ate quickly, drying your hair and styling it afterwards. Roscoe was fed and you were already through most of the day.
You pulled out your nail kit from your stash of beauty products and laid out a protective layer on your bed. The playlist kept shuffling through some of your favourites. A gorgeous purple colour appeared before you under the tons of polishes you had. It was perfect and you knew Lewis would love it too. Not that you did it for him. You brushed layer after layer until you were satisfied with the result. It was glossy and simple. Just purple. Sophisticated, but not boring. The process was repeated on your toes as well.
After that, you decided it was time for some movies and popcorn. Lewis never really enjoyed things like popcorn, only ever allowing himself some dark chocolate with his espresso out on the veranda. So, you had to go out to get some. Since you lived quite remotely, you had to drive for a bit before the nearest store appeared. It was worth it though because you spent most of that night with comfortable blankets, popcorn, and bad rom-coms.
Roscoe was beside you all throughout the night, keeping you company with his huffs here and there. Pure tranquillity was what it was, and you couldn’t wait to do the same with Lewis the next evening.
The current movie had to be paused though, as you heard your phone ringing. It was your coworker.
“Hey? What’s up?” You asked, trying to sound hoarse.
“I just wanted to know if you were okay. Heard you were sick.” It sounded like she wasn’t fully sober and on public transport as well.
“Are you drunk?”
“No- yes- you tell me. We just went out for a drink after work today.” She was very clearly slurring her words beyond sensibility.
“We have work tomorrow, why would you ever do that?” Nobody had the guts to do something like that when your job consisted of aiding clients in stressful financial or legal situations.
“We don’t, actually. All of us were just fired on the spot today. He fired us all,” she chuckled and let out a hiccup.
“What?! What’s that supposed to mean?” Your heart sank. Your job… it was just gone.
“Yeah… I don’t know. I think he was in debt or something. Couldn’t keep it going so he decided to sink us all down with him.” You always pictured the CEO as someone with gravitas and money, but apparently, it was all a front.
“What do we do? Can’t we report it to HR somehow? Sue him for wrongful termination?” Admittedly, as calm and collected you usually kept yourself with work-related issues— you were panicking.
“There’s nothing we can do at this point. The entire company has gone to shit. Wouldn’t want to go back there if I was given a raise.” It sounded like she got off the bus, as you heard the doors open.
“You’re lucky you have Lewis. He can take care of you, right?” There was that dreaded guilt of leeching off of your boyfriend. It was a fear that kept gnawing at your ankles, eventually making it to your throat, knowing you had just lost your job.
“I… I don’t know what to say right now. I’ll call you later when I’ve thought about all of this. See you.” There was nothing more to say. It stung that you were in a position where Lewis had to take you under his wing. It felt wrong. It felt criminal.
You really couldn’t catch a break no matter how hard you tried. Something always prevented you from enjoying life as it came.
… and that night you didn’t sleep at all. You stayed up all night contemplating what to do, whether to sue, whether to leave Lewis and tell him to live a good life?! You were going insane. Embarrassment consumed every fibre of your being. The thought that you would depend on him for your survival…
I'm the girl next door, let me come in. I know I go-go dance but I do it for kicks. I never have to work ‘cause my daddy is rich…
+1 | Once Upon a Dream
You’d fallen asleep in the late afternoon after working on a lawsuit against your former boss. It didn’t matter if you’d get it thrown out of court. You just wanted to fight as much as you could. Your great lawyer friend agreed to help you out, representing both himself and you in the case.
Lewis tried to call you several times with no answer. He wasn’t one to worry about you, since he trusted you and knew you wouldn’t do anything stupid. He disregarded it and tried to enjoy his flight home. He was exhausted and just wanted to come home to his little family.
You usually called him before he’d take off, assuring him that you’d be waiting for him at the airport. However, this time was different. You didn’t call and you didn’t answer. His options were limited, forcing him to take public transport. He didn’t want to call a taxi, as they’d be able to note his address and could potentially put you in danger.
People took pictures and some asked him for signs. He didn’t mind it, though he was falling in and out of sleep. When he got off his stop, he decided to walk the rest of the way. The weather was fair and didn’t look like it would change for a while.
On his way, he stopped by a florist to buy you a bouquet of your favourite flowers. He knew you loved having them on the dining table to show any guests.
He wasn’t far away and could see the garden of your house from afar. Meanwhile, you were still buried under your blankets with the lawsuit on your laptop on the coffee table in front of you.
The sound of the front door clicking and closing could be heard, but you were too far gone in your sleep to notice. He called out your name with no response. You weren’t in the bedroom. You weren’t in the kitchen. No, there you were. Your face was buried in the arm on the sofa and the TV was still playing a movie he remembered watching with you some time ago. He saw your laptop, reading some of the contents that were visible on the screen. It didn’t quite make too much sense, but he didn’t want to pry in case it was private.
“Hey… I’m home.” He shook you gently and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. Being something of a light sleeper, it woke you up almost instantly.
“Lewis?” Your eyes fluttered open, as you had to adjust to the light. You saw the face of your lover and embraced him in an instant,
“Oh, I missed you!”
“I missed you too, darling.” He stroked the back of your head as it rested on his shoulder.
“I’m so sorry I didn’t come get you, I was caught up with work and I fell asleep.” It wasn’t a lie per se. It worked… sort of.
“It’s fine. It’s completely fine. You seem distressed, are you alright?” There was nothing you could hide from him. One way or another he’d find out anyway.
“I lost my job. We were all fired.” He was almost as shocked as you were the night before,
“Are you serious? Why?”
“My best guess? The company was sinking.” You sighed and picked up your laptop. The document already contained 3 sections and 15 pages. You were, however, far from done.
“My friend and I are trying to sue. I’m not sure if it’ll hold up in court though.” Your face looked droopy and sad, something Lewis hated.
“You know what? It’s going to be okay. I know it seems rough, and it is. But look on the bright side. We can find you a better job. Better pay, better equity. Plus, for the time being— you could come along to my races. We wouldn’t need to be separated all the time.” He was right. Your job was cushy, but it had its faults regarding exactly the issues he pointed out. The feeling of missing him constantly didn’t bode well with you either. It was a win-win, really. You weren’t actually depending on him, because it didn’t hurt to ask for help every now and then. Especially when the two of you were so in love.
“Yeah… that’d be nice, actually. I do need to file this lawsuit though. I need it.” Lewis nodded in agreement and smiled,
“Of course, love. You do what you need to do. I’ll be here to help.” You closed the laptop and smiled back at him,
“I think we should cook some dinner. What do you have in mind?”
“Anything. It tastes amazing as long as you make it anyway.” The flattery never stopped. As cheesy as it was— you loved the sentiment.
“Right. I’ll see if we have some rotten eggs and spoiled milk in the fridge,” you joked and he chuckled,
“I love you, darling.”
“I love you too, Lew.”
That night, you fell asleep with his arms wrapped around you and your head on his chest. You could hear how his heartbeat synced with yours. This was complete tranquillity, and you couldn’t believe that this would be your reality for a long time now.
I know what you’ll do. You’ll love me at once. The way you did once upon a dream…
𝗥𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗼𝗽𝗲𝗻…
𝘾𝙝𝙚𝙘𝙠 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙪𝙡𝙚𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙜𝙪𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙗𝙚𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚!
𝙃𝙚𝙧𝙚’𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙖𝙨��𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩
𝙃𝙚𝙧𝙚’𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩! (𝙄𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙤𝙣, 𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙨, 𝙙𝙢𝙨, 𝙤𝙧 𝙖𝙨𝙠𝙨: 𝙒𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝 𝙙𝙧𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙧(𝙨) 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝 𝙩𝙮𝙥𝙚(𝙨) 𝙤𝙛 𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙜𝙚𝙙 𝙞𝙣.) (Please note that just liking the taglist will not put you on it!)
#fanfiction#fanfic#f1#formula 1#formula one#x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 fanfiction#reader insert#fluff#light angst#angst#sir lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton x you#lewis hamilton x reader#lewis hamilton#5 + 1 fic#f1 x you
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So we're about six weeks out from another "most important election of my lifetime" and it's predictably making me literally sick to my stomach. When Trumpacabra got elected in 2016, I threw myself into politics in a way I never had in my lifetime and it almost wrecked me. I was one of those people who never voted for religious reasons (long, separate story) and I felt I had to make up for lost time. By the time 2020 rolled around, I was an unhealthy mess. I had stopped reading. Everything. When I wasn't watching MSNBC and political commentators obsessively, I started consuming absolute junk TV: home improvement shows, crack paranormal ghost hunter crap, etc. Things with no plot, no emotional investment, no danger. No fear.
Right before the 2020 election, old fanfic friends from my days in the Master and Apprentice Star Wars listserv found me and saved me.
They dragged me back into fandom, introduced me to Discord, and got me writing again. I updated a story I hadn't touched in 5 years. I made new friends online and in RL. I got some great fiction and fic recs from those friends and discovered a subgenre called Hopepunk—low stakes fiction with very little if any violence and fear and with happy endings. (Becky Chambers writes a lot of what I read, and Amy Crook has also become a favorite.)
One morning, I had one of those really vivid, realistic, linear plot dreams that literally dragged me out of bed to the keyboard. It was a meet-cute modern au of The Phantom Menace's characters, set in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. I cranked out about 2000 words the first day. Then another 2000. Then another 2000. Then another 2000. And so on every damn day for the next four years until I had four novels, about 668k words, several timestamps written by three other collaborators who've come on board, some beautiful art I've been allowed to use, and now a fifth book in the works.
This is the Yooperverse.
It's not just The Fic That Saved Me, it's the place where I'm writing a vision of what the world could be like into being. A place where people with fucking obscene amounts of money don't spend it on themselves, or hoard it, or exploit other people to get more, but use it to help other people. It's a place where people who are bigoted dicks either get their comeuppance and crawl back under their rocks, or learn better and do better. It's a place where abused kids get rescued, everybody gets therapy and healthcare and is paid a living wage, people learn to value themselves and each other, and protect each other and defend each other. It's kinky and queer (although I'm neither) and above all, if not entirely safe to be both, I'm trying to write both things as just being another setting on the dryer. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
It's not a utopia, by any means, because there are still assholes and the government is still ... the government, and capitalism is still a thing. There's some danger, especially in the first book, and there are accidents and illnesses and the vagaries of life. In the middle of the series, I had spinal surgery and was out of commission for a few months and that made me start thinking more about my main character dealing with aging and the limitations thereof. There's a LOT of mental health issues and the working through thereof, and a lot of ongoing process. Nobody's perfect. The world outside is still pretty much what it is. But in the little corners where my characters dwell, life is pretty dang good, sometimes great.
It's a vision of a life we all deserve. It's the thing I loved about Star Trek's universe, where people's basic needs are cared for and the obstacles to them developing their best selves removed. It's what I've loved about science fiction in general, especially Ursula LeGuin's: that opportunity to explore possibilities that are better than the present. It's modeled on the MacArthur Genius grants, but you don't have to prove your worthiness first. My main character invests in people's potential, young or old, with scholarships and grants and a steadying hand. His partner builds low or no-cost housing for people in need. There's an informal network of queer and straight kid rescuing going on under the noses of unfriendly governments and failed social service safety nets. The main characters build refuges, literal and emotional. They love each other fiercely and respectfully.
Right now, we're living in a country that is almost the antithesis of these ideas, for far too many of us. People are being manipulated by their fears, which are stoked by unscrupulous, lying shitbag politicians whose all too real evil would never make it past the pitch if you were going to try to sell it as a TV show or movie. They're consciously turning us on each other with lies about our common humanity, about the state of our country, about who and what's responsible for many of its faults, sewing suspicion and hate. And though the Yooperverse started as my personal comfort fic, I'm trying in my very small way to counteract what's happening in the world right now.
I've always believed in the power of story to change people's minds and lives, and I've experienced it myself. When I talk about story, I don't just mean fiction, though. I mean the narratives we tell ourselves and others about our own lives as a whole and day by day or moment by moment. I mean the stories we tell about each other when we're together, at the bar, at wakes, at a party. I mean the stories we invest in as fans in whatever kind of media we consume. I mean the stories we spin for ourselves and others to explain what the everloving fuck is wrong with the world.
Stories aren't separate from the world, they are the world. They tell it into being. They give it shape and purpose and meaning and a sense of possibility. Whatever stories we tell ourselves or each other about how things should be or how we should act as human beings (also called our "beliefs" or "morals" or "ethics"), they shape us, and we shape society. We are society, both together and as individuals. One person with a big voice and a story can tip a mass of people into either violence or solidarity.
I have no illusions that the Yooperverse will ever have that kind of power. It has a tiny audience on AO3 and Discord and it's mostly written for me to explore the things I feel deeply about, and wish I could do, and to teach myself to be a better person and live up to my own ideals. It's a world I'd like to manifest, to call into being, even in a small way. Even if it's just a story.
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Ok so I recently found your work and I. Am. In. LOVE. 😍 I was wondering if you could do Karma Akabane with a very cat-like reader? I'm talking someone who isn't fast to trust but clings to the few people they like. Or like constantly taking naps and yet is somehow always on top of their game when it comes to assassination or academics? If not that's cool though.😊😊
Karma with a cat-like crush
[ HEADCANONS ] [ Karma Akane ]
[ Assassination Classroom / Anatsu Kyoshitsu ]
Idk why but I got emotional haha
I ended up loving it, I hope you like it as much as I do
Karma is really smart and observant, is probably that since the start he had noticed you, although since at first he was more prideful and a little arrogant he didn't give you much importance, what could lead you to don't trust him at first neither
But as the classes pass by and the assassin training win more importance is where you get the oportunity to show your skills and true potential, however at first were everyone who where amased by your great reflections and elegant movements
Karma is competitive and rather prideful, specially at first so seeing someone that could be better that him it bother him (but he tries to hide it, he won't let you see him like this), he will try to approach you to challenge you, directly or indirectly, but accept is your choise, at the end he will still really interested on you (if you accepted and win it would be more out of frustration)
And when he start to notice how good you are with academics too your rivality just increase, you are getting in his prideful side and his challenging attitude increase. With this he isn't giving you a really good impresion, and you two probably were only related by the rivality for a while, but after some time he just start to get more curious about you wanting to know more outside of the challenges even when he doesn't express it, now more than a rivality he wants a friendship
He noticed how you seem more relaxed and even cling to the people you trust, contrary of how you act with others being just polite, even with him you just act either defiantly or just ignore him (depending on if you like challenges or not), so he knows that if he wants to approach to relate with you in a more friendly way he needs to win your trust first
The more you are bothered by his challenging and prideful attitude the more difficult will be for him to approach to you, and the more obvious will start to be for others his intention too, although is more probably that the ones who notice will be Nagisa and Koro-sensei, who offers to help him if he fails to get close to you
Although Karma is stubborn and since his personality is pretty charming it won't take much time for him to win your trust and become your friend, and with that he had the opportunity to get to know you better
Karma actually likes that you cling onto him, that means that you trust him the most, that flattered him and make him feel proud, and as the time pass by and he start to fall in love with you he just loves more that you cling onto him, he sometimes needs time for himself or maybe you just go with someone else but in those moments he end up missing your presence, he gets so used to you clinging to him that when you aren't with him he feels like something is missing
Also he can be pretty jealous when you cling to someone else, not matter if is someone of the group or not, he likes that you trust in others too but he can't stop himself from getting jealous, specially if you are affectionate, the first few times he got jealous by it he didn't hide it too well, those who pay close attention or know him well can easily see that something bothers him
He finds pretty funny that you like to take naps so frecuently or that you can fall sleep wherever, at first he just let you be and leave you alone, but after some time when he finds you sleeping he sits beside you and just make you company, he prefers when is just the two of you because that way no one will see how his expression softens, how his smile sweetly at the view of you sleeping peaceful or how he likes to play with your hair and pat your head softly from time to time
He doesn't mind if you wake up and see him there, he can easily came up with an excuse, saying that he is just looking after you since you are being so careless to fall sleep, and if you ever came to him because you wanted to nap beside him he will be so flustered but he hide it and let you do it, he says that he doesn't care but it actually mean a lot for him
He tease you a lot for your cat-like personality, always putting you nicknames that are relate to cats and making jokes like asking you to not purr
The rivality part never really goes away, but it lose importance after a while and just become a thing between you two, just challenging and making bets to each other as friends
With some time his crush become obvious and at first he was annoyed by it (specially when his classmates tease him), but after some time he just don't mind anymore, and even when he doesn't accept directly to others he doesn't deny it neither, and he isn't planning to confess right now mainly because he likes to play around
#assassination classroom#assassination classroom x reader#ansatsu kyoushitsu#ansatsu kyoushitsu x reader#karma akabane#karma akabane x reader#karma x reader#anime and manga#anime x reader#anime x you#x reader#x gn reader#anime#manga
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Mad About Dodo: Rosamund's Reaction
Requested by the masses (okay, just @ravingsockmonkey, but a very important member of the masses). For context: Rosamund is Araminta's mother, and Araminta is competing on @akitasimblr's Mad About Dodo challenge.
Some of Ana's screenshots were used as flashbacks. They're the much nicer ones.
"Oh now, really Sara. I shall be quite alright, thank you. Do have a lovely time with Cecilia and Kim now, please - and give them my regards. It is after all not every evening that one gets to attend a live reading by Octavia Bailey-Moon."
Narrator's voice: It would turn out that Rosamund would not be 'quite alright...'
cw: sims death and harm
"Hmm. Now let's see if I can untangle this love polygon."
She had steeped her tea just so for an evening of judgment and drama when something quite unexpected occurred.
Dreadful, thought Rosamund. Simply appalling stuff. That boy had a mother. A very poor one, judging by the end product, but he had been someone's child. Was still a child - in oh so many ways. And perhaps this excursion would have allowed the opportunity to show himself in a better light, had his potential not been cut so cruelly short.
Then the next scene occurred, and Rosamund thought no more.
Except of red and rage and ruin.
This time Leonardo Harper had gone too far.
"Ezekiel. Apologies for the late hour. I find myself in need of a loading screen to Sulani. A red eye. I will take the first such opening available - even coach." "Even coach, Madame?" "Yes. It is that dire. Fear not. I am up-to-date with all my shots." "That you are, Madame. I shall make the booking right away." "Oh, and Ezekiel? Being such an upstanding graduate of the Windenburg Butlers Academy, I severely doubt that you associate with such riff-raff - and therefore would not know where to find a spellcaster or two for hire. Which being a lady, is a task that I would never expect you to undertake."
"That I do not, Madame. Coming so highly recommended as I am, I would be unaware for example that spellcasters reside in a place called Glimmerbrook, and are also said to frequent an... establishment known as Grimtooth's Bar and Bunker..." "Hmm. Quite. And as such an outstanding graduate of the Academy, I likewise doubt that you would have any dealings at all with werewolves." "...Understood, Madame." "That will be all, Ezekiel. Thank you. You are a true - a true asset to this household, and I shall not forget it."
#my sims#araminta hearst-irsay#rosamund hearst-irsay#mad about dodo#other people's sims#other people's gameplay#other people's cool stuff#tw: death#cw: death
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Okay- so I feel like im a bit calm (definitely real) after yesterdays finale to properly make a statement about it
And I really want to put a few of these points out there while the tags are still trending and while I still have time cuz now that AAA I finally over I really need to focus on my studies which is gonna be hard…..but yeah it is what it is
And honestly
Look idc what anyone says anymore
Yes there were some loose ends and a whole lot of questions
And I get that a lot of people were upset…..believe me I was too and still am
But I wanna be a voice of positivity
cuz I feel like whatever plot wholes they left
Like jac said were there for US to interpret
Or as my delusional ass is telling me maybe theyre setting up for another season???
And yes for those of you whore saying that we shouldn’t be the ones to figure theyre story out YOURE RIGHT, I AGREE WE SHOULDNT
But at the end of the day it still was a marvel show
And Whatever it was
It was an amazing experience
Yes we had our highs and lows
And Looking back on Agatha’s story, yes I do feel a mix of admiration and frustration. There was so much potential in exploring her relationship with Rio and the complex layers of her own journey, which felt overshadowed in the end. At times, the focus on Agatha's role as a mother felt like it could have been handled differently and Instead of fully delving into Agatha’s growth, her story was ultimately used to elevate Billy’s arc, leaving her character, her grief, and her love for Rio without the closure they deserved.
That being said
Again while it's fair to wish for a bit more closure for characters like Agatha, Rio, Jen, and Alice,
I truly do think jac schaeffer is a genius
like for a really long time i used to think that we were reading too deep into scenes and that they arent actually that deep and we’re just being delusional
But watching, reading interviews of her
Finding out that as a matter of fact it actually IS that deep
And that everything means something and nothing is unintensional
just hearing her talk about the characters she writes is such a fulfilling feeling you have no idea
its the way she understands those characters and portrays their trauma….She really cares for themm
she does her research and makes sure she understand her characters and the lore
unlike *cough michael waldron cough*
Who couldnt even be bothered enough to watch a show which was an indefinitely important arc for one of the characters he was assigned to write for a movie
Its just-
Look all im tryna say is
Shes a master in her craft and no one does it like her
despite everything she provided us with two of MARVELs best shows up to date and no one can tell me other wise
Cuz While the narrative pivot left parts of Agatha’s story untold, Schaeffer's dedication to character depth shows her commitment to storytelling which you can really see in the way she talks about those characters
again while I wasnt satisfied with the finale its her dedication to understanding these characters, down to the smallest detail means so much to me.
Cuz it’s not just about the story—she collaborates with her actors to bring out the arcs they envision which makes it even more special
And It’s truly disappointing that Marvel didn’t fully capitalize on the opportunity to explore Agatha’s own arc in its entirety, especially with such a capable writer at the helm.
Still, I’m hopeful that future stories will revisit and give the characters like Agatha and Rio the focus they deserve
And i reallyyy hope they sign jac up as a writer for future projects
Cuz ultimately, I think her approach to these characters makes her one of the standout storytellers in Marvel right now, and I’m excited to see what she does next with all the new responses from the fandom
I hope you guys get what im trying to say
Anyways to conclude my thoughts
Whatever it was
I truly did love this show
And ill really miss coming back home on Thursdays to watch the new episodes drop
#agatha all along#agatha harkness#agathario#rio vidal#kathryn hahn#aubrey plaza#vidarkness#halloween
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chapter 156 thoughts
Chapters Since The 143 Kiss Happened And Went Entirely Unacknowledged And Unaddressed Count: 13
Aqua Hoshigan Status: N/A
I'm gonna be real with you gamers I don't have a lot to say about this one LOL. Typically these Mem chapters come at the top or bottom of volumes as transitions between phases of the story so getting one slap bang in the middle of what will be volume 16 is a little jarring, as are the contents of it. Despite making up 1/3rd of the current B-Komachi, Mem is pretty underutilized across the whole manga so while it's nice to see her be given a proper arc capstone chapter all to herself, it feels underbaked. I almost suspect that the beats of this chapter may have been intended to serve as the bones of a Mem mini-arc at some point but with only so much time to spare before the manga ends it was crammed into this one chapter. Without any room to breathe, none of its beats hit.
Mem and Frill being friendly enough for solo hangouts is cute, though! One of the things I did like about the Movie Arc was the way it mushed the wider supporting cast together into a more closely knit social circle and I like seeing that reflected in moments like this. It helps add to the sense of them being people living their own lives who have things to do outside of dealing with Hoshino Family Drama.
The story swinging back to deal the elephant in the room that is Mem's real age is also potentially juicy but - say it with me, folks! - lacks the build up it needs to really be worth taking seriously. Prior to this, Mem's age has mostly been played for laughs when it has come up with no real indication that it's something the manga wants us to take seriously. In that way, the slightly blase framing of it here does better suit as a resolution than suddenly taking it deadly serious was but it does just end up feeling like something Akasaka added to the manga not because he felt it was an important part of the story but because it was next on his checklist of things to tie off before the manga ends.
This can really be felt in the way this chapter really fails to dig into why Mem even had to lie in the first place - there's the off-handed acknowledgement of Mem wanting to be an idol and her age potentially being a barrier in that regard but it doesn't actually dig into this premise of Mem's age being a problem. In a series whose proclivity for infodumping about the ills of the entertainment industry is practically a fandom joke at this point, it feels uncharacteristically restrained for it to not take this opportunity to talk about how this attitude is born from fetishizing, commodifying attitudes about youth and supposed 'purity' and the ageism and misogyny many adult women in the entertainment industry all over the globe have to deal with.
In general, OnK has been pretty toothless the last few arcs when it comes to the cast having to actually navigate the industry's toxicity. The way Ruby's struggles with idolhood are held up as comparable to Ai's is one major symptom of this that I'll probably go into at some other point, but we also see this in characters like Kaburagi and Shima-D too - despite being objectively pretty scummy individuals in terms of both their behaviour within the industry and their interpersonal relationships, the note the manga seems to have ended on for both of them is a sort of 'aw shucks he didn't mean none of it' wishy-washiness where it's unwilling to hold them accountable.
This toothlessness adds to making everyone's immediately acceptance of Mem's lie ring so deeply hollow. No scandal, no negativity, no nothing. An utterly frictionless resolution that feels as though it added nothing to the plot point it was tying off. Again, it would feel weird for this to become a big dramatic beat when the story has so consistently treated it like a joke but this half-baked conclusion leaves me feeling lukewarm at best.
To not end this on a sour note, I will say I really like the note this ends on of Mem deciding to shoot for university and I like Ruby finally giving Mem even a shred of props for the backbreaking amount of work she put into B-Komachi's growth. Appreciate Mem more, you little gremlin!!!
Speaking of Mem's JD dreams though, I've heard some speculation so far that Mem shooting for university is an indication that she's also going to be leaving B-Komachi but… eh, I disagree. Mem talks about how much the group means to her and her revealing the lie here feels like a step to try and protect her place in B-Komachi and ensure she can keep performing with them.
Break next week to no one's surprise… did y'all know the volume 15 release in Japan says volume 16 isn't dropping until December? Wild.
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Our favorite Elain stan 🌷🦌☀️ !!
1. Why is Elain one of your favorite characters?
2. Is there a specific scene that made you like her?
3. What theories/headcanons do you have for Elain?
4. Feel free to share anything else about Elain that the questions didn’t cover!
≽^• ˕ • ྀི≼ Me?? Thank you!! I love any opportunity to discuss Elain.
Why is Elain one of your favorite characters?
She is one of my favorite characters because I find her incredibly relatable. Elain is a chronic people pleaser, fueled by her intense desire to be kind and maintain the happiness of those around her, often at her own expense. She's a pretty face who is often underestimated and ignored for what lies beneath it. I think she's a fawner (no surprise) when it comes to doing what she wants. She has a really important story to tell in learning how to stand up for what you want and being brave enough to take control of your destiny. I know a lot of fellow women who relate to this quintessential story of the societal expectations placed on traditional views of women and who also need to learn this as well (myself included - I learn over and over again because it's a hard lesson).
2. Is there a specific scene that made you like her?
“Elain had always been gentle and sweet- and I had considered it a different sort of strength. A better strength. To look at the hardness of the world and choose, over and over, to love, to be kind. She had been always so full of light. Perhaps that was why she now kept all the curtains open. To fill the void that existed where all of that light had once been. And now nothing remained.”
Because nothing captures my heart so hard as much as the characters who choose goodness and love again and again even when the world beats them down. Even if they're doomed. Against all odds, they choose hope. Everyone around her chooses a weapon, but Elain chooses a different strength that is just as powerful but often misunderstood. Because that inspires me.
3. What theories or headcanons do you have about Elain?
My theory is she will have earth magic that will assist in healing the Spring Court. Bonus points if Lucien's Day magic can work together as a team to make it happen too.
4. Feel free to share anything else about Elain that the questions didn’t cover!
I love Elain exactly for who she is now. I am excited to see her grow and all the potential that has been planted for her character arc, but I stan Elain in her present form as well. I know that sentiment isn't always shared. But I proudly love her and all she will become. She is so relatable with a special place in my heart. I look at her character, and even the way she is treated in fandom, and I relate to that too. A lot.
Can't wait for her POV and hero journey to hopefully come next. 🌷
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i'm on an Alastor Moody kick and have been once again reminded that he'd be extremely shippable (the tortured past! the snark! the magic eye that can see through your clothes!) if fandom was at all fair. so! some moody love for the deranged ships game, even if some of these aren't particularly deranged. Moody/Tonks, Moody/Bellatrix, Moody/McGonagall, Moody/Crouch Sr., Moody/Lupin, and Moody/Lucius.
(bonus round: what's your fave Moody ship? i was genuinely on board with Moody/Tonks the first time i read the books to the point that remadora blindsided me badly)
thank you very much for the ask, anon! which had some overlap with a second batch of ships for the man, the myth, the legend alastor moody:
so let's get into it!
alastor moody/nymphadora tonks
i am afraid i can never get into this as a pairing because tonks and moody have the exact vibe of my two cats, one of whom is big and tired and the other of whom is small, cheeky, and desperate for his approval. he just wants to sleep in the laundry basket without her coming to sit on his head! moody, in much the same vein, just wants to be constantly vigilant without her giving out about it being cold in the sky or pestering him with questions about who it is he knows that blasted their own arse cheeks off with an improperly-stored wand.
i accept that this may, for many other people, be the exact appeal.
bellatrix lestrange/alastor moody
while in disguise as moody, barty crouch jr. heavily implied that the two of them had a torrid little affair in the late seventies. this was a lie - bellatrix either wants a man with a nose or a man without one, not someone faffing about on the fence with half.
minerva mcgonagall/alastor moody
i fully back this one, on account of the fact that celts need to stick together.
and - of course - that moody [even if he wasn't really moody at the time...] needed disciplining for his behaviour after transfiguring draco malfoy into a ferret.
barty crouch sr./alastor moody
an absolutely huge potential for shenanigans here.
we know - for example - that moody is raging about crouch agreeing a plea deal for igor karkaroff, and i also can't imagine that crouch had much time for moody's more paranoid traits… not least because they had the potential to uncover what he'd done with his son.
all of which is to say… there's a hot premise lurking here, either for enemies-to-lovers or the equally exciting enemies-to-enemies-who-fuck.
remus lupin/alastor moody
i back this entirely. it's clear on several occasions in order of the phoenix that moody has appointed lupin as his right-hand man, and that he trusts and respects any information lupin provides for him.
[lupin also insists on accompanying bill to look for moody's body in deathly hallows.]
which means we have to speak frankly... lupin was clearly having a bit of fun on the job in his year living at grimmauld place. and it wasn't with tonks or sirius...
lucius malfoy/alastor moody
Malfoy, whose pale eyes were still watering with pain and humiliation, looked malevolently up at Moody and muttered something in which the words "my father" were distinguishable. "Oh yeah?" said Moody quietly, limping forward a few steps, the dull clunk of his wooden leg echoing around the hall. "Well, I know your father of old, boy... You tell him Moody’s keeping a close eye on his son... you tell him that from me."
canon.
alastor moody/lord voldemort
which had its own request, from a lovely anon.
i genuinely really back this one, because - much like pairing voldemort with barty crouch sr. - it offers so much potential for political shenanigans.
moody was obviously hugely important during the first war - not only to the order, but within the ministry-coordinated response to the death eaters - and so i think that we can assume that he had numerous opportunities to meet voldemort for a bit of… back room negotiation.
after all, what are we told in canon? that moody never killed voldemort's forces if he could help it. why? because forcing your situationship to come arrange the release of hostages is a god-tier way of getting round his refusal to text you back.
[i also think there's something really interesting which could be done with the fact that moody's body is altered so profoundly by the course of the first war. just like voldemort's.]
when it comes to these two as each other's teenage sweethearts, i will... also back it.
i agree that moody and voldemort are probably roughly the same age - and i'm also quite invested in the idea of moody, given how paranoid and off-putting he is, being in slytherin. while there's a clear discrepancy in both the looks [there's no suggestion moody's much of an oil painting even with his original face] and the social status [moody doesn't strike me as somebody who'd be willing to pretend to enjoy the slug club, for example, whereas voldemort has a much greater tolerance for the act] departments, i have a great fondness for the teenage voldemort simply being annoyed by someone into a life-long relationship.
they could wile away the hours yapping about foe glasses and coming up with increasingly unhinged conspiracy theories about dumbledore.
pure romance.
barty crouch jr./alastor moody
flopping.
barty had a go - obviously - because teaching a full course load after you've been under the imperius curse for a decade must be mind-bogglingly stressful, but moody wasn't having it.
barty retreated to his room with his series of long-lens paparazzi pics of seventies-era voldemort on holiday.
alastor moody/horace slughorn
slughorn tried to woo moody once, but he became convinced that the bouquet of roses slughorn turned up on his doorstep brandishing was cursed and punched him in the face.
#asks answered#asenora's opinions on ships#unhinged and deranged ships#moody's version#alastor moody#nymphadora tonks#bellatrix lestrange#minerva mcgonagall#barty crouch sr#barty crouch jr#remus lupin#lucius malfoy#tom riddle#lord voldemort#horace slughorn
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I’m wondering (and not sure if this has been talked about yet in a post I simply missed) about how Abram copes with Andrew’s physical affections (or lack thereof) in your lovely royal AU. With the history behind ‘pretty’ that you described for Abram in that last post, I feel like there is so much potential of him expecting to be touched, even before they are courting (but especially during/after), and wondering why Andrew doesn’t—especially once it’s established that he thinks of Abram as ‘pretty’. They are of different station so it would be so easy for Andrew to act entitled to Abram’s body like so many before, especially with Abram in a position where he’s basically serving him in some way. I wonder if it makes him relieved (due to professionalism/personal comfort at the very beginning) or anxious (due to having no ability to tell what is coming for him/later due to doubting if he is really wanted that way if Andrew doesn’t act the same as his point of reference) or a little bit of both for different reasons.
I imagine Andrew to be both a very tactile person and not necessarily so because he is so very aware of boundaries and only crosses them with invitation or purpose. I wonder how that translates here and how his touch plays into how Abram perceives him (and honestly there’s the whole part too where it’s something they have in common, trampled boundaries and bad associations and bone-deep understanding of such) or if they would ever have a conversation about that where Abram wonders about the curtesy of distance and space he is being given.
I’m like two seconds from passing out bc it’s pretty late here so idk how much sense this ask really makes but I’m having thoughts. I love your AU and your work and hope you have a wonderful day <3
YOU GUYS ALWAYS FIND THE MOST INTRIGUING THINGS TO EXPLORE I LOVE YOU (and your comments/etc, apostrophe-philosophy, are always a joy to read hehe)
(First: find the royal au writing masterpost here 💕)
I’ve been working on/thinking about this ask long enough that I’ve straight up forgotten if this was a thought I had when writing that first post (here) or if you brought it fully to my attention but we can safely assume it’s the latter so thank youuuuu for that truly. I love exploring Abram’s slow inch (and Andrew’s, but he’s had more time to get adjusted) towards finding a healthy relationship with touch 🥲 and oh my GOD don’t let me forget to tell all of you about Abram and gloves
I wrote a scene/lil collection of scenes about Andrew clearing things up here too because I’ve been wanting to explore Abram’s POV for a while 👀 there are references to canon abuse, so take care. As always, sparknotes version and additions below
I LOVE your points about Andrew, I totally agree that once it’s established and he’s allowed, he’s very much a tactile person, he just needs to get there first 💕
We all know for obvious reasons that it never once crosses the prince’s mind for Abram to be anything more than a professional bodyguard, even if he does find him attractive. He’s very good at courtesy and polite distance. How I imagine this goes down in the timeline is this:
1) Nathaniel shows up at Palmetto and he’s never allowed close to important people. Certainly never allowed close enough to touch. Totally safe there. It doesn’t take him long to understand Day really won’t take advantage of him since he never did in Evermore either, so that’s safe. There’s not much else to worry about for that long stretch of time.
2) Nathaniel/Abram becomes the prince’s guard. There’s probably a little anxiety just because there’s plenty of opportunities for the prince to try something, but as time goes on and Andrew keeps the previously mentioned distance, even acting apathetic (as he does), Abram starts to assume that the prince is straight/doesn’t care. It wasn’t as if every single person in Evermore was trying to get at him. Just the ones that wanted to. Obviously, the prince doesn’t want to. It gets to the point that Abram feels comfortable and doesn’t try to constantly watch his own back when he’s on duty.
Then the prince, perhaps feeling a little bold or hopeful or just wanting to say something so he doesn’t keep feeling like he’ll explode, makes a single comment on Abram’s “pretty face”. Even something that could be brushed off as friendly jest, if he really wanted. But Abram completely freezes up. Andrew, of course, notices. He doesn’t try to ask about it then, but he definitely notices. But he assumes that Abram took it as the genuine compliment it was, and that Abram is entirely uninterested or even wary of those advances. So he makes no more comments, he leaves the entire concept as far away as he can get it.
Now that Abram knows the prince finds him pretty, he’s just waiting for Andrew to be the same as everyone else. He didn’t even directly answer to the nobles in Evermore and they were still so bold - but he’s Andrew’s servant in the most direct way, and Andrew is a prince. Surely the prince is even more entitled to him than they were. (When he realizes this is what’s happening, Andrew tells Abram in no unclear terms exactly what is and isn’t expected of him. It takes longer than that for Abram to shake the anxiety he grew up with, but at least after that he can start repeating the prince’s words to himself when he needs to.)
3) that’s cleared up well enough, but then (much, much later) the prince wants to court him. At first Abram can’t think much beyond “there’s no way this is real” but then the more he thinks about it, the more nervous he gets again. He doesn’t know Palmetto courting traditions, what if he’s expected to do something he isn’t ready for. What if now that he’s accepted the courtship he can’t tell Andrew no anymore. It wouldn’t be fair of him to, he thinks, he shouldn’t have agreed so quickly.
But there’s a time they’re out doing whatever courtship things (maybe another horse ride for funsies idk), Abram’s getting nervous about it again, and when Andrew asks for a kiss or to hold his hand, Abram doesn’t answer. He’s also a little confused when Andrew doesn’t just do it anyway, because he hadn’t said no, but Andrew is watching him in the way that usually means Abram is acting too much like he’s at Evermore again. He tells Abram, “Nothing’s changed. You can say no.” And Abram does immediately - not because he doesn’t want whatever he was offered but because he scared himself. Andrew’s still watching him. “Don’t forget that again,” he says. Abram takes a shaky breath. “Yes, prince.”
But as soon as Abram’s past that anxiety for the second and probably final time? Andrew is still as tactile a person as before and gods know Abram is touch starved to hell and back, he’ll take any kind words or touches he can possibly get and he craves them. Specifically from the prince. Who loves to give them.
I’d love to come back and make a fluff post specifically about that point in the timeline if we can collectively come up with enough ideas for said fluff 🥰 for now thanks again for the ask, swear to GOD we’re gonna get these idiots a happy ending, but I’m having way too much fun in the meantime 😂
#hand studies doubling as relevant art to post 🙏#this was such a good point#your half delirious tired thoughts were INCREDIBLE#i didn’t get to the point about Abram thinking Andrew doesn’t actually like him because he won’t touch after they’re courting#but that can definitely be part of it#I just also think that past a certain point Andrew is asking every few days or frequently enough#that Abram realizes both that Andrew *does* want him like that#and that he really is allowed to refuse if he feels like it#based on the few times he does and Andrew moving on without further comment#very casual I feel like#idk I’m not making very much sense either in here#I wrote the post earlier than I’m adding tags#tag-writing emry has a headache 🥲#ohhhh but if Andrew is asking and Abram never does….#Andrew doesn’t wanna be pushy#that’ll be fluff that’s later#I need to be done here#fan art#my art#aftg#all for the game#neil josten#andrew minyard#andreil#royal au#my writing#asks
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It’s been made pretty clear by the fandom, not just Buddie Shippers, that we aren’t really fans of who Buck and Eddie end up with in the finale.
The biggest issue I have with the pairings is that they weren’t worked up, they kind of just showed up and we have no reason to care about them.
If these women are supposed to be endgame, at least give us ample reason to support the choice.
Natalia: They really screwed up her character because there was so much potential in making her interesting and someone we would like to get to know. She’s a death dula and Buck died. Instead of having her tell Buck that it’s so “cool” that he died they could of had her play an active role in having him process his death. I mean they still have the opportunity to do that but after they gave us a cringe date, a recycled story line, but with less depth, they gave us too many reasons to dislike her as a character for me to even see that play out.
They made the same mistake they made with Lucy. Instead of having Natalia be a friend to Buck they force her to be a love interest which adds nothing new to bucks character.
But imagine Buck’s character development if Natalia was a friend. He would have gone from Buck 1.0 ( The guy who only does hook ups), to Buck 2.0 (the guy who just ends up in relationships) to Buck 3.0 (the guy who chooses himself and is able to be friends with a woman).
We can also address the fact that there is a lack of chemistry between Buck and Natalia. The kiss in the finale was awkward and not in a cute endearing way. I will say, I love that she doesn’t look like she could be related to Buck. I’m willing to see their relationship play out during season 7, but I just can’t see it being the end game.
Marisol: Where did she come from. What do you mean this is the girl that has Eddie acting like a middle schooler. She came out of nowhere and we know almost nothing about her, besides the fact that she fixes her brother’s mistakes.
I rewatched Season 6, Episode 5: Home Invasion, where we are first introduced to Marisol and after watching the episode, I believe the fan theory that her brother’s rescue was originally written as a boyfriend being rescued. But after the scenes where already filmed, the writers decided she’d be the love interest so they re-recorded the audio of the scene. I’m serious go back and watch her emergency, there is something off about it.
Marisol to me feels like another Ana. No substance, no reason for me to care about her. They both barely interacted, so their phone call makes less sense the more you think about it.
The same episode where Eddie is told he can’t look for love, he finds what he’s “been looking for”. This feels like Eddie is again only doing what he thinks he is supposed to do. Instead of processing his feelings of loneliness, he’s doing what he thinks the world expects him to do and date someone. He married Shannon because he felt like he had to. He stayed with Ana because he thought it was best for Christopher. And he’s settling for Marisol because he doesn’t want to be alone. None of those reasons are good reasons to pursue someone for a serious relationship.
It’s one thing to have Eddie date because he wants to be outside his comfort zone, meet people, and have fun. It’s a completely other thing to have him date because he feels like he needs to.
The only way to make Marisol a good character is by having her be a person that helps Eddie figure that out. She helps him realize that it’s not just about the end game, but his ability to just enjoy her company and not so worried about what the end result. She can just be someone he dates because she was fun to date. A relationship that shows him that you can have someone be an important part of your journey, but not your end game. Like a summer fling.
Given the fact that the actress who plays Marisol recently reposted a transphobic meme and couldn’t even attempt a sincere apology, I hope we don’t get to see her at all in season 7. She can be explained away by Eddie mentioning her once and just saying it felt promising but she just wasn’t the one. I have no interest in see their relationship play out.
Buddie: In my opinion, the best match for Buck and Eddie will always be each other. The writers have their relationship set up as the perfect slow burn, friends to lover scenario. And even though they screwed up the finale a bit, they can easily correct their wrongs. Buck and Eddie’s chemistry is undeniable and having them end up together would play into their individual story lines so perfectly.
I need this relationship that has developed organically to flourish in Season 7.
I will continue to manifest Buddie and let me use this moment to state couch theory is not dead. Buck will just need to get rid of another couch.
#911 fox#evan buck buckely#buddie#911 abc#eddie diaz#911 season 6#buck x eddie#buckley diaz family#911 spoilers#911onfox#911 show#911 season finale#the gay firefighter show#couch theory
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Is that an apology? Yes. All right. No! Look, because you never would've let me work my magic if I had told you, and then I would have ended up transferring to another station to save you from yourself, and…this worked out so much better. And if you can't see that, I'm sorry not sorry. Okay. I accept your non-apology.
| ANATOMY OF A SCENE - CHENFORD EDITION 5.16 - Exposed
I'm not going to lie… this is one of those scenes that I wish I could fully love… It has so much potential, but, unfortunately, it feels like something is missing. Like, say, a deeper conversation between Tim and Lucy… one where he gets to explain why he is so upset with her in the first place. Is it because she went behind his back to orchestrate the five-player trade, as suggested here? Is it because he worries about how this makes him look, as he implied earlier in the shop? Those are not mutually exclusive but since he never get to properly voice his thoughts on the matter, we never really find out which is it (or if it's both for that matter). Instead, it is skimmed over, as if it was an argument just for the sake of it.
Now, there's nothing wrong with that in itself… Not everything needs to be an arc. But as this 'fight' is connected to two storylines, it needed more depth. And this is where I, personally, feel a bit let down by this. I absolutely loved how Lucy didn't hesitate to put her career on the line to help Tim find a more suitable job, just like he did when he decided to take a desk job for her… They are prioritising the other, which is something neither of them ever had before… And that is extremely special for them, to have this unconditional support and love. In Tim's case, he was asked twice to sacrifice his career. And this time, he has someone who does everything in her power to make sure he can have it all, a job that he loves and a relationship. But none of this is truly acknowledged. We saw Lucy being grateful and appreciative when he transfered for her but not Tim… And I have a hard time believing that he wouldn't be even a little, once the sting fades. That is not to say he doesn't have any reason to be upset… And that's my second issue with this : this could have been used as a setup for the coming angst, the one that is brewing with Sava and Jake, Isabel's return, Lucy's undercover mission… All these episodes have one main theme : how secrecy and lies can destroy a relationship. How this is what actually started to break Tim's marriage with Isabel, long before her addiction drove the final nail in the coffin… So this could have been the perfect opportunity to have Tim confide in Lucy why her going behind his back, no matter how good her intentions were, is triggering some bad memories. Why their promise not to lie to each other is that important. This could have tied this whole arc altogether in a more organic way.
That said, I love how unapologetic Lucy is. She gets where he's coming from - to an extent. But she still stands her ground, simply explaining why she did it. After all, this all started because of the decision he unilaterally took, when he went to Grey and accepted a desk job, without consulting her first. So her worries that he would end up resenting her, their relationship or even just his situation are natural. Honesty works both ways. And that's the thing with them : while they are usually really good at communicating, they can also be selfless and impulsive when it comes to the other, ready to sacrifice themselves so the other can be happy. That, and they're both used to being independent. They just need to find a balance in their personal relationship. And as upset as Tim appears to be, it's quite clear that he is ready to move on right after her first apology. They might be good at arguing but he doesn't like being mad at her, that much is clear. He can't even stay that way too long, even after she turns the tables on him #sorrynotsorry. His smile… He's just so amused and disarmed. He can't even hide it anymore. So much for not being a softy...
(To be continued...)
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So I wanted to talk about Akashi and compartmentalizing for a quick sec...
Just so we're all on the same page, to compartmentalize is "to separate something into parts and not allow those parts to mix together" (source: Cambridge Dictionary). And the concept of compartmentalizing is so prevalent in Akashi's character.
The first level of this is obviously his dual personality. Akashi has split his identity into two distinct parts. The first one is his original self. His original self is kind, mild-mannered, and considerate. It's everything he was raised to be by his mother since Fujimaki said in an interview that Akashi was more like her (I'm assuming both in looks and in personality). His other self is a manifestation of what Akashi thought he had to be in order to maintain control of the basketball team. Cold, intimidating, and emotionless. Perhaps he was trying to emulate what his father expected of him, or maybe trying to emulate his father's actual personality, but it's clear that after Shiori passed away, Akashi has always categorized himself as two people.
But then there's a layer under this. I don't think the anime covered it the way the manga did, but in the manga, it was stated that Akashi was so dangerous as a basketball player because of the fact that he had not one ability, but two. The first ability is his 'court vision' that allows him to be extremely observant of his surroundings and create opportunities for perfect passes. The second ability is the 'Emperor Eye', which is him using his accurate predictions of players' movements to intercept their passes as well as ankle-break them at will. But throughout the series, we've come to realize that neither personality could do both at the same time. The reason? Akashi didn't just compartmentalize his identity, he compartmentalized his own abilities, too.
Because, again, no matter how much Akashi's other self feels like a different person, it's still all him. So, theoretically, he should be able to use both his exceptional court vision and his Emperor Eye no matter which personality is in control. But because his other self was created to do things Akashi felt his original self wasn't able to do, that's why his other self can also use abilities that Akashi did not think his original self was capable of doing. However, the downside to this is that he tricked himself into believing his original self did not have the potential to be greater, and that in order to grow and improve his basketball skills, the only way was to let his other self take control and abandon who he originally was.
To Akashi, his original self was weak and timid, and that's why his original self couldn't control the team when it was falling apart in his 3rd year of Teiko. But his other self was supposed to step up and fix all of that. It was only in Extra Game that Akashi realized that the only reason his abilities were so hindered was because of these handicaps he was placing on himself because he truly believed deep down that, as his original self, he was physically incapable of being the skilled reliable captain that his team needed.
This is why it was so important for him to get out of the mentality of compartmentalizing, because as his original self, he is capable of everything his other self could do, but it took so long for him to understand that due to his own distorted view of what makes someone powerful and deserving of a position of leadership. And really I'll just chalk that up to his father's shitty parenting and Teiko's equally shitty principles related to victory, but it's just so interesting (and heartbreaking) it is to see just how much compartmentalizing played a role in his downfall.
#i've been thinking about this for weeks tbh i just never got around to typing it up#but yeah if anyone wants to continue this convo please do#i always love reading other people's perspectives about akashi#kuroko no basket#knb analysis#akashi seijuro
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Thank You for the Food
Han Jumin x Reader
Living alone is fun and liberating until you fall sick and there's no one to ask for help when you're too tired to cook or fetch your own food. This is a lighthearted wintry story for anyone who needs a holiday pick-me-up.
In Another Story, when Jumin texts you "text denied", you can get a heart from him if you reply with "denial denied". That's when I know this man got verbal sparring potential, which is to say, my kind of man. The banter here is 100% powered by that.
Words: 3.5k
Masterlist Read on AO3
Jumin likes you. You don't know this yet, and perhaps his feelings haven't grown that deep to be labelled as love, but he has a very strong inclination towards you.
Jumin wants to do almost everything for you. You're an important member of the RFA, as he likes to remind you, so he wants to cook for you when you fall sick. It's a reasonable thing to do, so please don't read too much into this.
Jumin is atrocious at cooking. His list of experiences consists of making instant pancakes, and that's it, really.
But it's late and he's here after a hectic work day, arranging the steaming soup he'd personally packed from home on your dining table. He's here, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up, winter coat hung by the door, concern knitted into his face. He's here, standing as awkward as the bare Christmas tree in the room that you haven't had the chance to decorate, but you don't feel uncomfortable because he's here. He's here, he's here.
Your heart makes way for him.
Jumin sets down a spoon by your hand. "Is your headache persisting? If you need to see a doctor, I can refer you to a specialist in the area."
You shake your head. "It's fine, I just need to rest. I'm only like this because I overworked myself. The holiday season is always rough. And yes," you say, holding up a hand before he could protest, "I've taken a break from work." If you don't stop him in time, you know you'd be subjected to a slew of nagging, fully backed up with scientific research.
"How about your fever?" Jumin asks while sliding into the chair opposing you. After a beat, he leans across the table with an arm stretched out. "May I?"
It's an opportunity to engage in physical contact with Jumin, and you are an opportunist when it comes to him. Your hand reaches for his and presses it to your forehead. Your skin burns against his cold palm, but the fault isn't entirely on your fever.
Jumin stands up immediately and places his other hand on the side of your neck. "Your temperature is still very high. Are you sure you can take care of yourself like this?"
You give him a pointed look. "If it's low I'd be a corpse."
"If it's lower you'd be normal."
"Are you saying I'm abnormal, strange, odd, peculiar, et cetera?"
"I'm referring to your current biological state. Only with a healthy body, you can function with optimal productivity." Jumin is very determined to share his wisdom. "If you'd like a caretaker…" he trails off, frowning. "Actually, I'm available to stay over if you need me to," he enunciates his offer carefully, letting it hang like a question.
Though every cell in your body screams in agreement, you set your hopes aside. He could have meant nothing by it. He could have only been extending his hospitality as a friend, nothing more.
His hands are still on you for longer than necessary.
"I'll decide based on how good your masterpiece tastes." It was a safe answer. As you shift your attention to the soup in front of you, Jumin pulls back, seemingly too aware of what he has let happen.
The soup is still hot, its swirling steam brushing your face. It has a muddy texture and a stuffy aroma with a note of coarseness, which you doubt it's how it's supposed to smell, but you're willing to give Jumin the benefit of the doubt.
"Masterpiece? Well, I suppose it is." He straightens his vest and slides back into his chair. "My chef said ginseng chicken soup is an effective remedy to fever, so I would have to thank him later."
"Wait." Your mouth hangs open, spoon hovering. "This is supposed to be chicken soup?"
"Yes."
You blink. "Then where's the chicken?"
"I burned it." Jumin clasps his fingers on the table. "I didn't have time to boil another one, but I'm sure its essence has seeped into the broth. Chicken essence also has medicinal qualities, I heard."
"Medicinal," you echo. Perhaps you should retract the benefit you extended to him.
Jumin gives you a confident nod and you smile hesitantly, raising the spoon as a cheer then take a sip. Then fight back a cough. Then fight to keep your expression straight.
Not to be dramatic, but it tastes like death. Did Jumin pour the entire ocean tainted by factory waste into this soup?
His creation should be on the Guinness record. It's a miracle how it can be excruciatingly salty and bitter with none of the usual earthy sweetness from the ginseng. This is best served for your worst enemies, except you aren't sure if your current worst enemy is the soup or Jumin. If he told you this is an elaborate plot to worsen your health to prevent you from returning to your hellish routine, you would probably believe it.
It would be an insult to thank the chef for this.
But Jumin's watching you eagerly and you can't bear to stomp on his spirit, so despite how your stomach is very much stomping in protest, you force a wide grin. "It's very unique and flavourful! I can still taste the chicken on my tongue. It's like its poor burnt soul had never left the pot. The power of phantom chicken, truly." You cover your mouth, attempting to hide a cough. "Did you follow the exact recipe?"
Jumin seems relieved at your reaction. "Actually, I took some liberties. I may be a beginner, but it would be boring if I followed the chef's instructions precisely, so I put my own twist and innovated a brand new dish."
This innovation could invent a new illness in people.
"Wow, I didn't know you're creative too. Good for you!" You can feel your grin evolving into a wince, so you quickly scoop more soup into your mouth. Better finish it fast than let it grow cold. Who knows how it would taste then.
"May I give it a try? I'm curious how it managed to warrant such high praise from you," he asks.
Your throat is as rough as asphalt when you croak, "You didn't try when you made this?"
"I was rushing to get to you. As you already know, I'm good in all my endeavours, so I was confident this would turn out well." Jumin sits back with arms crossed, a smug smile tugging his lips. "It appears that once again, I'm right."
Look where over-the-top lying and grade-A bullshitting got you.
"No," you briskly say.
His smile turns into a frown. "No?"
"No! You're not suggesting we share a spoon, are you? That'd be unhygienic."
"Surely you have another spoon at home?" He looks around the kitchen and sees the cutlery rack. "Oh, it's there. Please sit down, don't exert yourself. I can get it on my own."
As Jumin walks towards the rack, you quickly jump off your chair while ignoring the pounding headache that follows. "Jumin, wait." You grab at his arm desperately. "You made that soup for me, yes? That means it's mine to finish. Don't even think about stealing my food."
He turns to you almost just as fast. "Don't jump like that. Are you all right?" He holds you by your shoulders, grey eyes flitting up and down to examine you. Only when he's reassured of your wellbeing that he relaxes. "I find it surprising that you don't want to share food. When have you changed?"
"Since you made that soup with your whole heart." You motion at the bowl beside you. "It's mine, all right?" Without waiting, you swipe it off the table and try to gulp down the rest.
Keyword: try.
It's a fantastically failed attempt. They say the more you grow, the more you know yourself. Well, it's true. The questionable things you'd do for a crush know no bounds. Turns out, it's you who deserves an award for being the best fool in love.
You're about to finish when you begin to choke, and what a sight it is. You, trying to dial back the coughing to a minimum to avoid spreading the virus and embarrassment, yet visibly cringing from swallowing the contents. Jumin, his whole body frigid in alarm before switching the bowl out of your grasp with a glass of water, which you gratefully gulp down.
So much for pretension.
"Okay, fine, it's horrible," you give in, tears blurring your sight. Would it be too much to declare your taste buds to be damaged?
Jumin's expression is a slow-motion picturesque of horror. "You lied to me."
"I can't mock your hard work to your face," you hurriedly say. "I love the, um, texture? It's soupy. Transported me to the seaside. Very refreshing."
If the seaside is engulfed by a tsunami, that is.
"Soup is supposed to have the texture of soup," he says.
"It could've gone worse! It could've been so lumpy it's chewy."
Jumin looks affronted. "Has the fever gone to your head? What kind of liquid is chewable?"
The salt has.
"The fever is in my head. And in my other body parts. Don't you know how fever works?" You cross your arms. "And, insinuating me of delirium and therefore incapable of forming coherent thoughts just because I'm slightly sick only makes you sound all the more condescending. Maybe your soup has transformed me. Maybe your soup has dissolved my brain into mush. Maybe your power of cooking has transcended science."
"Then stop eating it if you hate it so much. Just how bad could it be?" Jumin fetches a spoon from the cutlery rack and tries it himself.
To no one's surprise and probably Jumin's only, he instantly sputters it out. You watch him. Then, with an attitude fuelled by a hundred I-told-you-so's, you calmly pass him a glass of water.
"Why," he gasps, "would you put your body through this? This is inedible."
You pat the edge of his lips with a tissue—a wonderful disguise to touch him again—and decide to test him. "Why do you think?"
"If you're doing this to spare my feelings, you're only wasting your energy. I don't get easily offended and I'm excellent at receiving feedback. I would've improved this soup if you had told me the truth."
You wrestle the bowl out of his hand and place it on the table. "Jumin, from the bottom of my heart, I'm begging you not to do anything more to it. Ever heard of what doing the same thing over and over again while expecting a different result means?"
"The very definition of improvement means implementing different methods to make it better."
"Not when those methods have one thing in common: you."
"You seem to have lost your pleasantries, but I'll excuse it since you're ill," says Jumin, tone totally pleasant.
"Do you know how aggravating you can be?" you retort, not at all pleasant.
Jumin nods solemnly. "I've heard Zen accusing me with more colourful insults. It also appears that Assistant Kang often shares his opinion." Then he puts on a neutral expression so carefully crafted that you know it's anything but. It's an expression designed to boast. "Of course, I'm one of a kind. It's natural that not everyone can get along with me. It'd be a privilege to gain my courtesy."
And yet here you are in my house. "I wouldn't say it's a privilege to be personally poisoned by you."
Jumin grunts. "That's not what you implied when you doled out those high compliments."
"If you'd read into the subtext, you'd know I wasn't praising you." You pick up the bowl again and sigh. "Let's move on to something else after I finish this."
"Are you serious?"
You mimic his deadpan tone the best you can, "I'm always serious."
"So now you drink poison."
You shrug. "You said it, not me."
This time, Jumin touches you first. His fingers splay out on your arm, halting you from doing another stupid thing. As you proclaimed earlier: the best fool in love.
"Pardon me if I still can't comprehend why you're so adamant to finish that," he says. "Unless you're trying to prove that the fever has infected your brain?"
You aren't going to let Jumin push you to confess first. Not when you're in your worst shape, complete with ashen lips and bird-nest hair from lying in bed the whole day. Your nightmare before Christmas has arrived too soon.
"Are you asking because you really have no idea or are you looking for confirmation?"
Jumin tilts his head. "What are you insinuating?"
"Don't play coy, Jumin."
"I'm not playing anything. It would be cruel to play with a sick person."
Sometimes, a person could get a sharp zing of epiphany and it would feel like this is it, this is what you're meant to do. And sometimes, that moment comes when the man who stirs up a flurry of emotions in you is so infuriating that it has become your new mission to make him confess first.
The visit, the food, the dancing around the truth. They all click. The fever has not gone to your head.
Who visits a random woman's place on a freezing night, during peak season at work, when the said woman is only felled with a mild illness, nothing medication and rest can't cure?
Not Jumin.
"Let me ask you one thing. Why are you here?" you prod.
Jumin looks at you as if it's something you should already know. A common answer to a common question. "You need to eat a proper meal and no one's around to take care of you. I'm not going to let you drag yourself out for food when it's a blizzard outside."
Glancing out the window where snow is falling rapidly, you won't deny that trudging alone in that weather would be a poor survival method. Zero out of ten doctors would suggest it.
You snort, eyeing the soup at hand. "And this is a proper meal?"
"Accidents happen, but my intention remains the same."
"You could've ordered something for me, sent over a chef, or asked Jaehee to check on me. Aren't you too busy to waste your precious time like this?"
"No time is wasted if it's spent on you. You're an important person to me, so I needed to make sure with my own eyes that you're all right." Jumin's forehead creases with worry. "All I could think about at work was you. I was afraid you might faint and no one would be here to help."
You don't bother to hold back a small smile. "Well, you're here now, so what's your assessment?"
At least he has the decency to look contrite. "Moderately alarming upon first look, worse after consuming my soup. My alarm is on full blare now, so please, stop this madness." Jumin pries the bowl out of your hand and sets it back on the table before fixing his posture. After a moment, he pushes the bowl farther out of your reach for good measure.
You shake your head at how adorable he is. "I also have an assessment on my own."
"Go on."
"I think the things you said and did are a roundabout way to confess your feelings for me. You like me."
You let it float between you, trying to gauge Jumin's reaction, but he's still, too still for your liking. You know you aren't wrong, but could this be the wrong time to poke at his feelings?
"And would it bother you," Jumin asks slowly, "if I tell you that you are correct?"
Bother you?
Bother you.
Jumin must think that his feelings could disrupt your peace, but if they could, then you don't want to know another moment of peace. He's the one who gives you the sense of calmness that you long for. His mere presence brings you comfort. He's the one you rely on to lift your spirits. It's appalling how your feelings that are so palpable to you could be invisible in the eye of your direct affection.
You take a step closer, studying him. Black hair thoroughly mussed by the wind, ruddy cheeks, and a tender expression that you've never seen him wear with other people. "Do you really think you're the only one with a crush?" you whisper.
Jumin stares at you in disbelief, but it slowly morphs into relief when the truth dawns on him. "I didn't want to be," he murmurs. "Truth be told, I've had my suspicions since you insisted to eat that cursed dish, but I couldn't be sure until you give me a clear sign."
"So you admit that you're searching for a confirmation." A smug grin appears on your lips. "I literally swallowed poison for you. If that isn't a clear enough sign, then I don't know what is."
He clears his throat. "I wouldn't go so far as to call my cooking poison. It was a beginner mistake at worst. Can't you spare some mercy on my first trial?"
You gawp. "To hell with mercy. I was your experiment subject?"
"I thought it'd be more special if you were the first person to try my cooking."
"It was certainly nothing like anything I've tasted before," you say.
His lips pressed into a smile. "Thank you."
"That wasn't a compliment."
"I was responding to your sarcasm with sarcasm. Do keep up." Jumin's eyes twinkle with mischief, and it makes you want to strangle and kiss him at the same time.
You rake your fingers through your hair. "Should I kick you out?"
He raises his dark brows. "You wouldn't want to do that."
"I want to do a lot of things to you, Jumin." You hoist yourself up the table and smirk at him. "Shame they'd have to wait until I recover."
Carefully, he slots himself between your legs, arms kept to his sides so he won't touch your bare thighs by accident. It's endearing how cautious he is. "Is there anything I can do to make your illness go away faster? I can't wait to see what you've got planned."
You laugh. "You'd be scandalised."
You close your legs just a bit more so they brush against his trousers. Jumin's breath hitches and you arch a brow, a silent dare for him to make his next move. He chuckles, then settles his hands on your thighs. A light touch that turns into a reassuring grip.
"I doubt they could rival my desires against you." His tone takes on a sultry cadence that draws your body in.
"Stay the night. You made the offer earlier, and the weather is too harsh to go home. So, stay."
Jumin lights up at your request, and you feel giddy with how transparent he is. Look at the joy you can spark within him. "Are you going to pour wine for me while putting on the records too?"
You crack up laughing. "I can't believe you just quoted 'Baby, It's Cold Outside'!"
"Paraphrased," he corrects. "It's unfortunate that they don't mention wine in the song. Didn't they know wine is the most fitting drink for the holidays?"
"You think wine is the best fitting drink for any occasion."
"Red wine contains antioxidants that are helpful in preventing coronary artery disease and has been proven to reduce stress and anxiety. It has countless qualities that are beneficial for your health," says Jumin.
"Like your ginseng chicken soup?"
He sighs. "I see you're fond of reminding me of my failures."
You make a show of cleaning invisible dirt on his shoulders. "I'm fond of seeing you admitting defeat," you say. "And you haven't given me an answer. Will you stay or do I have to belt out the whole song to persuade you?"
The corner of Jumin's mouth twitches up. He's always been fond of your theatrics, and now, finally, he knows that you want to be with him as much as he does. "Of course I'll stay, I'd be a fool to turn you down. In any case, I'm glad everything works out."
The triumph in your chest transforms into suspicion. "What works out?"
"My overnight clothes are packed inside that briefcase." Jumin gestures at the leather briefcase on your couch.
"You planned for this?" you ask, partly in awe, mostly in surprise.
"I simply prepared for all the possible scenarios."
"And one of them is to sleep with me."
Jumin rubs his lips. "I never mentioned anything about sleeping together."
You roll your eyes. "Fine, but don't ask me to sleep with you later, because I won't."
"Is this the game you want to play?" Jumin braces his hands on the counter, trapping you between him. You have to keep reminding yourself not to make out with him when you're still sick. "Very well. For your information, I never lose. If you don't want to sleep with me, then don't." He leans in, lips nearly brushing your ear. "See how long you can last."
But just because you're ill doesn't mean you've lost your touch. You tilt your head to meet his gaze and smirk. "Game on."
-
Footnotes:
Wanted to title this "Jumin's Bullshit" as a reference to Tyler's Bullshit from the film The Menu, but alas. Holler if you've watched it tho!
Went with ginseng chicken soup because it's a traditional Korean healing food and I thought Jumin would want to cook something with a homemade feel to comfort you. Also, I was craving it.
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#jumin's naïve borderline unhinged side is the highlight of his character actually#mysme jumin#jumin han#jumin x mc#jumin x you#jumin x reader#mystic messenger fanfiction#mystic messenger#mysme#mystic messenger imagines#jumin han fluff#mm#jumin han fic#xela writes
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