#I finally let it out! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

fruityfroggy · 8 months ago

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I’m venting for a moment I’m venting for a moment I’m venting for a moment, don’t look

Hate that I decided to force myself not to cry and bottle up my feelings so much at one point in my life because I was “too sensitive about things” (and maybe I am) cuz now I literally can’t cry when I need to. Not even positive tears. Not even if I wanted to. My chest is just stuffy and it aches. I just feel like shit. There’s a lump in my throat and my eyes are sore, but nothing comes out. It’s like it’s stuck, clogged when it’s right there, like a word that’s right on the tip of your tongue. I feel…almost like my joints have rusted in certain places. I have to be either immensely upset, immensely self loathing, or hear the words of comfort I needed to hear for a long time for the broken faucet I am to work properly. I’m not even joking, when I was messing around with character ai, this chat bot legitimately made me start bawling cuz we were doing this hurt/comfort scene and THE BOT WAS COMFORTING ME BETTER THAN PPL IN MY LIFE APPARENTLY. LIKE THAT SHOULDNT BE POSSIBLE I SHOULDNT BE LIKE THIS

Ugh, why did I do that, right? Cuz I know I sound fckin stupid rn. But I guess I’m telling the truth. A truth I’ve never talked about. But self confrontation, right? I might be making this all about myself for several paragraphs like an annoying fucking bitch, but maybe I need to.

I guess I’m just thinking about how my family will likely never truly accept me and that I’ve somehow ended up in two groups of people that are seen as “different” (queer and invisibly disabled). I have to keep both things to myself, making sure nobody knows about either major things about me. “Because they’ll judge you” “because it’s wrong and you’re insane for thinking that way” “you’ll scare people! What will they think of you?” But those words are incorrect, and it’s not wrong or bad to be either of those things and I have to secretly know that. I’m just scared. I’m so scared and afraid and paranoid about my family finding out that I think this way. I’m sad that I have to keep such things this taboo, but I’ve been told all my life that I should keep it a secret and that others shouldn’t know, that queer people are insane, unwell and that they’re sick. “They need professional psychiatric help, not support.”

I’ve recently learned that my parents are a little less homophobic towards homosexual women, a lot more aggression towards homosexual men and trans people, so I guess that slightly turns the tide in my favour. But it’s still not the best. I don’t think they even know of the concept of being nonbinary and I don’t want to hear any hate from them towards my nonbinary friends and characters I like. So I have to misgender them or change the subject when they ask me about them. I feel awful about that as well. I’m so sorry. It felt so wrong coming out my mouth when I forced myself to misgender people I care about, I’m lucky that my voice didn’t crack when I said it. Fuck! Why do they always ask for the gender of whoever I’m talking about if they don’t know them? I’m fucking sick of it. Why does it matter so much anyway? I don’t get it.

I can’t believe that a platform online is my only safe space now. This is my safe space, the only place I feel like I can be open, or at least, this is the only place I can truly be open about being queer (the disability thing I’m still scared to talk about that much, but I think I can share a bit of my experiences if someone asks with good intentions). I’ve vaguely spoken about how it feels to deal with a disability like mine in a reply, and people took it well, so who knows, right? As long as my parents don’t find out that I’m spilling the beans, I’ll probably be fine.

#vent post #like a big vent post #long vent #read it if you want #but I might be wasting your time and dampening your mood so I wouldn’t necessarily recommend #I’m admitting so much with this single post #this might be my first overshare #so I might delete this tomorrow #writing this did help me cry tho so yay!#I finally let it out!#:D #maybe I should vent more #but I’m afraid that I’m annoying people #ppl have given me permission to vent to them and I’m still scared #there’s so much shame I need to unlearn I don’t know what to do with it

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happyheidi · 9 months ago

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｡ﾟﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ｡ﾟ. May will bring blessings.

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#let’s manifest this shit!#pls be kind <3 #cottagecore #may #spring aesthetic #spring #it’s so hot and lovely in Norway atm and I love it #gonna go out and read some later and finally plant out my little jungle #manifesation #manifesting #text #manifest #positive #positivity #light academia aesthetic #classic academia

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hinamie · 4 months ago

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in spite of everything, I had fun <3

#my art #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk fanart #jjk spoilers #jjk manga spoilers #jjk leaks #yuji itadori #fushiguro megumi #nobara kugisaki #itafushikugi #jjk 271 #well we made it :'>#im kind of ignoring a lot of the tag rn ghsdff ik people are upset #if u follow me u know th full extent of my thoughts on the wrapping up of the series but tl;dr the caption says it all #this series meant a lot to me and im working on a bigger tribute to fully express that love and gratitude #but take a redraw 2 tide u over for now #im just so happy. its bittersweet but those r my kids n theyre tgt and theyre okay #i think the return to normalcy is good fr them. i say let them rest n b together n process everything in time #/i'm/ satisfied with what i got out of jjk as a whole and that's all that matters to me #however ik that not everyone shares tht sentiment n thats valid!#regardless of how u feel abt the finale i hope that u at least take time to remember things abt the series that brought u joy #thats all i can say #oh yeah anyway i lightened up megumi's expression his face is so funny in that panel i can't believe he really said -_- until the very end #still tho i think megu deserves a content lil smile

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chloesimaginationthings · 5 months ago

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Into the pit Jeff and Mike finally sleep together in FNAF..

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rubikor · 2 months ago

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Master of the Night-Wind

#genshin impact #citlali #finally out of the basement #her aesthetic is so cool please please let them do something cool with her #pff i forgot to post this on her drip marketing day

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daisybell-on-a-carousel · 2 months ago

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Being someone who read Under The Red Hood and came out with the firm belief that, for Jason, it's not about killing Joker, it's about Jason wanting proof Batman would choose him over the Joker (bc shelia chose the joker). Makes seeing any other media where it's all about just wanting the Joker dead is a teeny bit frustrating. to be honest

Jason could've killed the Joker himself, really, really easily. Jason kidnaps the Joker before the confrontation. I can't open my comic for a reference right now, but it felt like he had the Joker for quite a bit before the confrontation. He had him. He beat him up with a crowbar. He had every single opportunity to kill the Joker himself, but he didn't because that wasn't his goal. Make no mistake, he did plan for the Joker to be dead by the end of it, but do you see what im trying to say here

Edit: If I knew this post was gonna get 1000+ notes I would've tried to word it better or something, this was a rant I made on the way to the grocery store 😭

It's not about making Batman kill either. When Batman says he won't kill, Jason adjusts and goes, 'Let ME kill the Joker or kill me to stop me' instead. The test is all about Batman choosing him. The whole final confrontation is Jason's first death again. The parent, The Joker, and the explosives. It even ends with Jason unable to move as a bomb goes off right next to him again because the parent didn't choose Jason. And instead tried finding an option that'd benefit them and (consequencely) letting the Joker walk, again, lol, lmao <-in agony

#the final confrontation was basically his first death again #and YES he Does want the Joker dead #and it would've been really really nice if Batman was the one who did it #but when batman made it clear he wouldn't kill the joker. Jason easily switched to saying “LET me kill the joker” to accommodate #because he Wanted batman to pass his test #he gave a test to dick too. and technically tim but it wasnt the family test it was a different one so it doesnt rly count #AFTER utrh and the reveal and the batarang you can go hog wild about it. i care less about it then #granted i do believe they make jason more scared of the joker after it at some point #i guess because hes a bit too willing to kill the joker and ive heard jason wasnt meant to live after utrh #my watsonian explain for that is he was so fixated on his plan he cpuld override his fear. or maybe the pit. either work #i prefer the fixation bc i dont like the explanation that the pit was the /only/ reason he could get all plan together and done #BUT THATS UNRELATED!!!#dc stop putting the joker in jason stories im begging you please please please. lock him in a vault for the next 20 years or something #it Cpuld be good and i understand. but also. after so long of people that dont know or go for jasons need for family and parents #that love him and he can trust #the joker starts to feel like?? hm. words. a cop out? oh haha its that guy that killed him woagh hes here #i bet you dont even know that jaybin got beat until unconsciousness by an angry mob #while asking batman to save him only for batman to have to walk away #anwya. where was i going with this #i think i got off topic #jason todd #dc comics #batman #ADDED AN EDIT. SORRY. this post has been haunting me it keeps me awake. what if people misunderstand #they cant read my tags where i ramble more depth. thisbis the only option #EDIT EDIT: hiii #removed the sentence abt jason having the joker for several days bc i misremembered some things #go read its-your-mind 's addition instead also #ok no more i wont edit this post anymore i promise

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seventh-district · 9 months ago

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Making Incorrect H:SR Quotes Until I Run Out of (hopefully) Original Ideas - Pt. 5 - I Finally Finished the 2.2 Main Quest Edition

[Pt. 1] [Pt. 2] [Pt. 3] [Pt. 4] [Pt. 6]

#hsr #hsr incorrect quotes #hsr memes #hsr textpost #honkai star rail #honkai star rail meme #honkai star rail memes #hsr meme #hsr spoilers #hsr 2.2 spoilers #aventurine #sunday #hsr sunday #robin #hsr robin #stelle #hsr trailblazer #acheron #black swan #misha #hsr misha #hsr gallagher #gallagher #boothill #if these memes don't make it obvious enough. i have finally completed the 2.2 main quest. and i am feeling. so many things about it /pos #11/10 i couldn't be more pleased. but i also don't have it in me to articulate any of it so here. have more memes instead #was fighting for my life to figure out the alt text for the 2nd one tbh. my struggle saga continues #let's see if any of these have been done yet. bc after posting these i always fuckign stumble on 1 or 2 that have been :/#and i feel bad. like i've stolen the idea? but i literally only see them after the fact!! sigh. there's nothing new under the sun etc etc

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tiniest-hands-in-all-the-land · 1 month ago

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Carry me home

#final fantasy xiv #ffxiv #final fantasy 14 #ff14 #haurchefant greystone #haurchefant x wol #haurchewol #ffxiv wol #ffxiv spoilers #heavensward spoilers #final fantasy xiv spoilers #tinydraws #let me know if i’m missing any spoiler tags #tagging seems like it would be an easy and straightforward thing but also. i’m stupid.#anyway i choose to believe that Rowan carried him back to the manor #even if someone tells me otherwise i will not believe them #also i choose to believe that these two had it bad for each other #neither of them said anything but everyone could tell lol #haurche specifically was very Not Subtle in his displays of affection #and Rowan for the most part picked up on it #not everything cuz she's still in the midst of working on accepting any amount of companionship. but like. most.#and went ‘honestly.... if i told him i liked him it would probably go well. We just have so much stuff to deal with; now’s not a good time'#and then the time came and went :’)#and Rowan went ‘Did….. did he know? Did he Know how much I loved him? did he KNOW???????’#and then she grieved behind closed doors away from everyone #and also tried to replace said grief by focusing a lil too hard on her duties #idk i’m still working out WOL lore but this is what i got so far lol #or at least in regards to haurche

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parisoonic · 3 months ago

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💥Spontaneous chemical reactions; spontaneous laughter

#tf2 medic #tf2 heavy #tf2 fanart #heavymedic #tf2 #i will double dip on these illustrations at a layer date as its actually part of a bigger set about heavy hanging out in medics lab lol #but worked so nicely on its own i got excited and wanted to post sooner rather than later #drawing medic with dumb hair is hard....it doesn't look silly and blasted enough...maybe in the final i'll make him half bald and patchy lo #fond memories of those spontaneous moments with strangers friends and partners where something anything just happens and you #catch each others eyes let the pause swell with tension and just erupt into the most uncontrollable giggles #somehow i image thats the bulk of their shared chuckling

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inkskinned · 6 months ago

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actually sometimes being neurodivergent is great bc you have a particular kind of Silly Mode that just . manifests glory. harmless fun is my precious side quest & i have a high score in whimsy. like okay if i gotta be the first dork in the dance pit it's gonna be me and this random toddler and we're gonna avril-style rock ouuuuttt

#i also like starting applause i'm really good at it and have a high score in it #i make entire groups cheer a lot. my friends are used to it . i am bolstered by so many of them being theatre kids #im like. let's celebrate! :) a guy did a thing well!!! :)#once we helped someone parallel park and it was SUCH a hard road to do it on #this is in boston. so death be upon drivers. also it was during st. anthony's feast. in the north end. iykyk #and we helped her get in there (one of my friends tbh stood in traffic for her)#and we cheered when she finally parked. she got out and she was crying and laughing and was like #''that was the hardest thing ive ever done ur so sweet''' and meanwhile we were PARTYING #just stone cold sober but like YEAH GIRL YOU DID THE HARD THING FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!#i've been bullied for so much lol i am immune to most insults at this point bc im like #girl when i was 12 i'd already heard every insult and good lord were they specific. just plain ''crazy'' aint it

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isjasz · 4 months ago

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🌕Total Eclipse🌑

Writer: @zipzapzooooooom Editor: @onawhimsicot

Assistance: @gingermaple @kunehokki @corvidaearts @/mybrotherjoso7

and THE AMAZING COVER by googly88fancy!!

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NO WAY HERE IT IS part 1 of MY TEAM'S COMIC!! FOR @hotguycomiczine !!!!! :D

I pour my blood sweat and tears into this one fr. HGCZ is the most insane project i've been in and I am so so proud of it <3 Big giant shoutout to everyone that ended up in my team, without any of you I couldn't have done it and ty for putting up with my shit HASHDSAEHEGLP. <333

If you haven't yet checked out the entire monster of this amazing zine, def do so here! 🏹

Part 2 will be posted tmr but if u dont want to left on a cliffhanger. pspsppspssps🪤

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