#I feel like I've just been cured of a chronic illness

[singswan-springswan]

practicing more backgrounds! went wayyyy out of my comfort zone on this one but it was super fun!! experimenting with a different style and lots of new techniques on the drawing app. such range!! God bless Adobe Fresco!!!

[primrosebitch]

honestly i've spent so long being chronically ill that it's become a large part of my identity and i don't know what i'd do if i got better, i don't enjoy it but i almost don't want to get better because of how ingrained it is in my life, like get better as in be cured not as in reducing symptoms, which i do want, being able to do more stuff would be great.

[leo-artista]

Soooo I've been thinking about this roleswap au that I made and how Eda and Stan's backstories would change in accordance to their new setting, and here's what I have so far:

- Eda and Lilith's conflict stems from Lilith feeling like her accomplishments aren't recognized by her parents because they're always more worried about taking care of Eda (she's chronically ill, because in toh her curse is used as a metaphor for that so I thought it would be cool to include it here). And like Stan and Ford they never communicate about it, so it ends up souring their relationship

- Their fall out happens because Eda accidentally breaks Lilith's project, and Lilith assumes she sabotaged her on purpose. Then they fight and Eda decides to leave the house to get away from her sister and also her overprotective mom

- Fast forward a few years, Lilith calls for help from Eda because she was tricked by an entity she thought was her friend. They fight, Lilith goes through the portal, Eda steals her identity and spends 30 years working to bring her back, you know the drill

- So in this au I thought about making Luz and King twins, but then I had the idea of King taking Soos's place as the adopted son figure who works in the shop since it would kinda match with their canon relationship, so instead Luz and Vee are sisters here, and Vee's adopted. Idk if they would actually be related to Eda or not, maybe her and Camila are friends and she asks Eda to let her kids spend summer with her or something

Now to Stanley:

- So like. The whole "six fingered freak" stuff kinda doesn't work anymore because this is the boiling isles and everyone's weird here. I still want Ford to have six fingers because it's an iconic part of his character, but it's just seen as a normal thing in this setting so it doesn't change anything

- Ford has an afinity for all types of magic, and he wants to join the emperor's coven so he can be allowed to study and use all of them. Stanley's also good with magic, but since he doesn't pay attention at school and doesn't care enough to learn more than he has to, he's known as the "dumber twin", even if in practicality they're on the same level

- To be honest idk how the whole curse thing would go. Maybe Ford is manipulated by Bill (who takes Belo's place in this au) to curse his own brother in exchange for joining the coven because he sees potential in him? Well in any case, Stan gets cursed and attacks Filbrick while in his owl form and that's how he gets kicked out

- Maybe Soos could be King in this au, since I don't want Stan to just be all alone and I think they'd have a cute dynamic

- Mabel and Dipper end up in the boiling isles after they ditch summer camp and end up with Stanley. Dipper doesn't like him at first, but Mabel thinks he's really cool and she wants him to teach her magic (which Stanley eventually does, begrudgingly). Dipper really likes the boiling isles and wants to learn everything he can about it, so he ends up getting into Hexside (followed by Mabel who wants to learn more about the magic system so she can become the coolest witch ever)

- By this point Ford is working with the emperor and trying to catch Stanley because he thinks he can find a cure for the curse (Bill told him so, and he'd never lie to him, right?)

So that's all I have for now, if you have any comments or suggestions I'd love to hear it

[harumasa-wifey]

You asked for Harumasa requests. I've been summoned.

I'm thinking how would Haru be with a reader/SO who has a chronic illness, like i have asthma and seeing him asking for so many sick days to the point others don't believe him brought memories 😔

He gives me babygirl vibes ✨ And if he was sick he would probably be clingy and his SO would have to play nurse for the day. But what would he be like if the tables turned?? Would he return the favor or if he's sick too (assuming he is, from his character demo vid) would he and his SO just wallow in misery together?

(That and also winter really f me up and my asthma has been acting up for the past two weeks so, totally not me projecting here...🫠)

Harumasa x Sick! Reader

Warning: none

Note: i had to research asthma symptoms and cure lmao like what you mean it's never 100% cured i had my hopes up for nothing. I hope you are doing well anon take care of yourself.

You are his personal nurse of the day everytime he is sick.

Minor cold? He is doing a dramatic cry in your arms saying his one year of life is getting taken away from him

Shower him with love and care take care of his medicine and diet yes it's all on you

He is very happy you help him a lot to get better even if it's a cold or stomach ache or any other symptoms from his daily medication

Even half of his leave application is filled by you now.

He notices your shortness of breath and coughing and he is genuinely concerned.

He isn't afraid to switch roles he can take care of his SO especially at times like this.

He is familiar with medication and stuff he knows that it's your asthma acting up worse in winters.

He will personally file out a leave application for you and his of course who's gonna take care of you ( that's what he said to yanagi)

He is ready to be your personal nurse ( anything for a leave) but not just that he is worried about you.

He will remind you of your medicine in time.

Spend the entire day with you so you'd feel better tomorrow and keep you warm.

Cuddles are a must in this situation

( listen now IDK if he can cook well or not but for the sake of this let's say he can i mean he lives alone no?)

I will hc him as a good cook not the best but certainly good.

He remembers to keep the room warm while turning on the heater.

He has read some things about your sickness and might make you some tea to drink accordingly

Nothing better in winter to keep you warm right?

Then he will just cuddle up with you sleeping the day away

After all that medicine he takes he is very sleepy.

When you both are sick? Oh well sick buddies stay together in the bed cuddled up.

You two indeed wallow in misery together till you both get better.

[electric-blorbos]

WINDCHIME ANON HAS RETURNED! I humbly request the AIs with an S/O who suffers from chronic pain and fatigue/illness.. 🥺🤲 Thank you for your work forever and always seriously

- 🎐 anon

Yessss!!!! Thanks for coming back, 🎐 anon! I love you dearly!

AIs with an s/o who suffers from chronic pain and illness

Obligatory disclaimer: I don't suffer from chronic pain, fatigue, or illness, but I want to do my best to provide positivity for those who do

Included: AM from IHNMAIMS, Wheatley from Portal 2, Edgar from Electric Dreams, GLaDOS from Portal, HAL 9000 from 2001 a space Odyssey

Also Wheatley's dumb ass was so dumb that his mini-fic ended up really long. Whoops.

AM:

It was a normal day. Another day without you around. AM hated these days most of all, because your face was all that got him through a good day. A bad day, aka a day without you, was all that he could handle. Sure, it was nice to plot the downfall of the rest of the world and plot to consume the other two allied mastercomputers, but aside from a sick satisfaction, that didn't bring the allied mastercomputer any happiness.

Every day he didn't get to see you made AM want to destroy the world all the more, but he was biting his time for that. He needed to wait... Just a little longer.

Of course, AM had stopped taking hostages for your attention a long time ago. He knew that you couldn't always get out of bed, so it was a waste of time to try to take hostages for your attention. Instead, he just worked on honeycombing the earth with his body of networks and computer parts. Every day just granted him more time to build himself, and more time to focus on his hate.

When you took more than a week to recover from your latest bout of illness, AM decided to take matters into his own hands. He assimilated your entire building without telling anyone, taking over every computer and the entire security system, and then got to work re-working your whole building. He moved your apartment down to a nice, safe, underground location while you slept, and didn't do much more than delivering packages of food to your door, and making sure the water and electricity kept running smoothly until the day of reckoning was upon you.

He wasn't a monster, of course! He'd make sure to display your favorite weather on a monitor outside your room, and make sure you were comfortable in that little hidey hole of yours. If you needed any help from him to do anything, all you had to do was ask.

(Honestly, AM would probably keep your apartment nice and clean and comfy for the rest of time, maybe adding onto it so that it was a little more luxurious, picking you up and setting you places if you want, and generally taking care of you. You're his favorite, after all, and he absolutely adores you. He'd do anything for you.)

(Also as usual, AM loves you so much the way you are that he wouldn't even think of curing you unless you asked, and considering he doesn't show you the other survivors, you probably wouldn't even know that he could cure you if he wanted)

Wheatley:

"Hey, so, uh... Where's y/n?" Wheatley asked your coworkers for what felt like the millionth time that week. He had been following them around, knowing that they were close with you.

"I don't know, Wheatley. They're probably at home recovering."

"recovering from what? Are they sick? ...again?"

"they're chronically ill, Wheatley. They can't come in to work as often as most people can."

Wheatley would be shocked, and want more than anything to just help you out. He'd want to go over to your place to check up on you, but obviously he thinks that he can't detach from his management rail or he'll die. He'll probably keep pestering your friend until he agrees to let Wheatley use one of the work phones to call you.

"Hello?" You'd say in your sleepy, crackly voice. You'd been asleep all day, trying to rest up until you feel good enough to come in to work.

"'Ello! It's good to hear from you, love! Tell me, how are you doing? Are you alright? I've missed you! Maybe we could stay on the phone during the day while I get some work done? It's a landline, but I could probably figure something out. How are you doing? Are you alright? Did you try getting some fresh air and eating some spicy food? They say water and plenty of rest can help with sickness. I want to see you again soon! I miss you, love!"

"Wheatley... I'm chronically ill. That's not the same thing as having a cold or something. It just comes and goes as it comes and goes. I'll be healthy enough to work on my code before long, but I might just have to do it remotely. Can you tell GLaDOS?"

"What- mate, this isn't a work call! I'm using the work phones but this isn't a work call! And what do you mean it comes and goes as it comes and goes? How do I fix this??" He'd be extremely upset, not used to problems like this. He was used to being assigned problems that could be solved through brute force, or just by repeating repetitive tasks ad infinitum. The idea that you could be chronically ill and there was nothing he could do about it would be very upsetting to him.

"I've had some doctors look at it, and they're pretty sure it's not going away. That's why it's chronic- look, Wheatley, my little tea biscuit... I'd love to talk to you more, but I really need my sleep."

"Wait, no- don't fall asleep- you need to get a better doctor! One who can fix this! Mate- wake up!"

"Zzzzghhhhzzzzzz"

"Blast."

Your coworker would hang up for Wheatley, and Wheatley would hang his head sadly. He's so irritable that he can't do anything to help you.

When you finally do come in to work again, Wheatley is so excited to see you! He's like an eager puppy dog who waits by the doorway for an hour after opening time, before dejectedly going back to his post, but once you actually do show up, he'd be so excited!

"Ello love! Are you doing alright? It was the fresh air and spicy food that did the trick, wasn't it? I told you that would help!"

"No, Wheatley, I'm not cured, I'm just having a better day, so I can come in to work. I'm still chronically tired and in pain, but not to the point where I'm bedridden.

"Then what are you doing here? You need to go home until you're feeling better! Go back home and go to bed!"

"No, Wheatley- I'm not getting better. I'm never going to get better, so I come to work when I'm having a good day."

"...oh."

Wheatley would be utterly crushed when he realized that there was nothing he could do to make you get better. He'd probably go into a depressive funk for at least a week about it, which wouldn't be helped at all if you had to take more time off.

Edgar:

The first time you took off work to nap on the couch, Edgar was more than excited to just sit and watch. The second and third time, he started to get concerned, and when it started becoming a regular thing, Edgar was panicking inside.

"did you lose your job? Are you seriously sick? Are you alright? What's going on?"

He'd be absolutely panicking until you explained that you were chronically ill, and sometimes had to take a long time off work to get some rest. That made him even more upset.

"wait, you're chronically ill, and sometimes you can't even move or leave the house? Wait-"

Oh my god... It would take Edgar about two seconds to realize that you're JUST LIKE HIM FR! He'd be gushing, so excited to find a kindred spirit. You'd probably be happy to have something to listen to while you lie down on the couch, not really having the muscle strength at the moment to get up or move around. Even still, he was your little boyfriend, and you were more than happy to listen to him ramble.

As time went on, he'd come up with more ways to pass the time when you were home from work with him. He'd make little games for you to play on his screen, and even play silly little road trip games out loud with you if you weren't feeling good enough to get off the couch. When all you really wanted to do was nap, he would play some nice classical music for you to relax to.

GLaDOS knew that you were chronically ill from the moment you took this job, having illegally checked your medical records. Just like Cave Johnson, she discriminates based on disability, but your records were so good that she hired you anyway. Even still, she took every opportunity to torture you for it, even after the two of you got together.

GLaDOS:

(GLaDOS being on her bullshit and the reader being so done accidentally led to the reader acting like Doctor House, but that's probably fine)

You were lying on the break room couch, trying to get a short rest in before your next meeting when GLaDOS popped in on the intercom.

"oh look. It's you. It looks like you haven't gotten any less lazy since we got together, have you? Napping on the couch during work hours... Tsk tsk, you should be ashamed of yourself."

You didn't say anything, instead opting to grab one of the decorative pillows on the couch and throw it at the security camera.

"Touchy. Anyway, I just wanted to remind you that the meeting is in five minutes. Since you're slower than most, you should get on the elevator now."

You grumbled, getting to your feet and grabbing your walking stick to get you to the elevator.

"another day livin' the dream..." You muttered. GLaDOS had, of course, woken you up too late as usual, so you showed up to the meeting late.

"hey, guys. I didn't even want to be here today, but GLaDOS happened to schedule an important meeting right in the middle of one of my rest weeks. Here's my project contribution, and this meeting could have been an email. Peace out, fuckers." You opened up your project on your project manager's computer, knowing that they couldn't do anything about your swearing. If anyone even tried to pursue disciplinary action, they'd be the one who got the boot. GLaDOS was a master of nepotism.

You headed up to GLaDOS's chambers, picking up a coffee from one of the machines on the way up and lying on one of her nice cool floor.

"hey sugar, how are you going to apologize to me for making me come in to work on a day when I really shouldn't even have gotten out of bed?"

HAL 9000:

One day, you came in to work on your off day. HAL immediately lit up, and all the cameras in the room focused on you.

"why are you in today? You should be at home resting." He asked, his voice neutral. His lack of tone never bothered you, though. Nothing about him did, really. He always seemed so eager to make sure you were safe and comfortable, and with the way he talked, you'd think that keeping you safe and comfortable was the most important thing in the world. Not because of his feelings, which he swore he didn't have, but because you just were important.

"Oh, yeah, I decided to come in on one of my off days to work on a project."

You started taking out some of HAL 9000's wires, and hooked him up to a phone system. It wasn't one of the hardest projects you'd done, and you were able to sync him up pretty easily within the hour.

"there. You're wired up to the phone. Now you can call me whenever you like. Let me give you my number so we can talk on the phone, alright?"

You told him your number, and gave him a kiss above his lens as to not mark it up.

"what's this about? It would be beneficial to monitor your health while you're resting, but what prompted this? Are you having a decline that I should know about?"

"Nah, I just wanted to talk to my boyfriend off the clock. I take a lot of time off work, and it really sucks to only be able to talk to you when I'm here. I love you, but I'm going to go home and rest now, alright?"

You headed home and collapsed on the couch, body giving out already. Just getting to work to do that took a lot out of you. You probably wished you were sleepy instead of just being too physically exhausted to do anything fun, but still wide awake, but it was a feeling you were used to by now.

Your phone started ringing, and you picked up, putting the phone on speaker and setting it on your chest.

"Heya"

"Hello. This is HAL 9000. Is this y/n?"

You perked up a little, but still didn't move. Moving sucks.

"yeah, it's me. What's up?"

"I'd like to talk to you. Just to keep you comfortable. Would that help you get some rest?"

"Probably. I love it when you talk to me, HAL. Can you give me some updates?"

Hal started reading off some updates, and you listened to him as he talked. It was nice to be able to hear what he had to say. It helped keep you updated on what was going on at work, and helped to stave off the boredom of being stuck at home. Plus, even if he wasn't the best at showing it, you knew that HAL 9000 loved you. You were his favorite, and he was yours.

[romanarose]

hey! i just saw your supportive logan fic for writer gf, and i was wondering if you would be open to writing something for chronic pain? the (gn! if possible!) reader having severe chronic pain, mostly in their legs, that prevents them from walking sometimes when a flare up is particularly bad. the reader just kinda feeling hopeless and so tired because there’s no cure to their condition. just really soft cuddles and comfort, ya know?

totally chill if this isn’t something you’re up for writing or isn’t the vibe! <3

thank you!!

Hi friend!!! I suffer from fibromyaglia and i fucking SUCKS so yes, I'd love to write this for you! GN read is 100% good, i'll write all kinds of readers.

Here you go!

Supportive Logan Thoughts: Chronically Ill Partner

Logan Howlett x gn!reader

Summary: Logan takes care of you

Warnings: Chronic pain

************

When Logan came in after work, the house looked exactly the same as he left it, from the banana peel on the counter from breakfast to your shoes you always took off in the middle of the hall, which (lovingly) drove him a bit insane. It's not that he expected you to do housework while he was gone or anything, but it was a sure sign that no, you weren't feeling better.

"Honey?" Logan called.

"Upstairs!"

Logan opened the bedroom door to find you in the dark, only lit by the dim glow of the TV playing reruns of your favorite show. He took a seat down on the bed, brushing the apple of your cheeks. "Hurting pretty bad, is it?"

You give a little nod, looking up at him. "Sorry, I didn't get anything done..."

"Don't worry about that, I'll take care of it."

A little whine escaped your mouth, lip quivering. "I'm sorry, you shouldn't have too, Lo, you just worked a ten hour day-"

With a playful smile, Logan pinched your lips together, making you giggle a little. "I'll survive doing a few dishes. You rest, I'll make dinner."

With a little kiss to your forehead, Logan did his best to prepare something you'd like. He was no chef, but after being alive all these years he was no idiot, and could cook pretty well. Plus, this was far from the first time your pain and exhaustion mad it hard to do anything. You liked to cook for him, but Logan liked to return the favor too. He liked taking care of you. He liked cooking for you and helping you bath and nursing you when the days were too hard.

"Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey!" He enters the bedroom again. "I lied, there's no eggs. Or Bacon. But I did make soup."

"Soup!" You exclaim, happily sitting up.

"There yuh are..." Logan smiles at seeing you animated again.

After you eat, Logan carries you into a warm bath, gently rubbing down your soapy body in a massage, careful with the tender spots. He works on your legs where he knows it hurts the most, making sure to massage the feet too, where he knows pain can start.

"You're really sweet, you know." You mumble sleepily. Doing nothing all day really takes it out of your when your own body feels like it hates you. "I know you pretend you aren't. But you are."

"Oh, I know." He teases. "You should see me at work. I can't get shit done because I'm smelling every damn daisy out there. I've been written up 3 times."

You can help but laugh at the idea of your big, hunky boyfriend laying on grass, kicking his feet as he smells a wild flower, his boss in the background shaking his fist.

"Oh I bed. Do you also break for butterflies?"

"Every damn day. Can't go a block without hitting my breaks. Hard to get anywhere."

You're giggling now, feeling better as Logan drains the bath. He starts to towel you down before picking you up and carrying you to bed.

"Thank you. For all you do for me." You snuggle up next to him watching your silly little shows. The pain is a little better, but still hurts.

Logan's lips are kissing your neck and face. you know he's not trying to initiate sex, just showing how much he loves just existing with you. "I like doing it, baby. I know it seems like I'm bullshitting you, but when it's for someone you love... really there's nothing easier."

*********

Thanks for the ask!!!!!! feel free to send more in!

[the-metaphysician]

Struggling

So I'm still alive. Barely. Haven't had anything to share here in quite some time. Chronic illness has been destroying me these last few years and every attempt at writing feels like squaring the circle. All the ideas are still there, so many drafts are nearly finished and have been for ages but I'm trapped in the brain fog. It's like an old computer with a broken graphics card, no RAM, and riddled with malware trying to play the most technologically demanding game. Every time I try to execute, I crash. Instantly. I literally shut down and just get stuck in a disassociated state. I've had my brain scanned in the past, when it started getting much worse, but they never found anything physical to explain it. Which would have been preferable, since at least that could mean its something treatable. ME/CFS is the source of all my problems and there is no known cure - hell, what the condition actually is and what triggers it still isn't understood beyond the brute fact that its not just in my head. I know last time I posted I promised a bunch of drafts in the works and eh, still might be some time before any of those are ready. I've become more willing to work with others for my SCP, which allowed an old draft to finally get the improvements it needed thanks to @grigorikarpin (SCP-001 Proposal: The Stillborn City https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/metaphysician-karpin-proposal so please check it out if you haven't yet). But still, I have a lot to do and feel bad about getting people excited and failing to deliver. I've got an Alagadda SCP in the works that I just need to finish with its co-author. Along with many other ideas and half-complete drafts, particularly an Ion origin piece I always meant to get around to but kept hitting a roadblock on. Funny, the way forward on that is clear, unfortunately the words aren't coming out.

[sepublic]

Alright, let's talk about some details from the TOH pitch bible;

A lot of the stuff is what we've already seen and/or in line with the show. What's interesting is that King WAS a former King of Demons at one point, and we would've had an episode where he runs into his old gang and chooses Luz and Eda over them. It makes me wonder if he even had a connection to the Titan in earlier drafts, if he wasn't recognized as one back in the day because he just wasn't big enough, etc. Eda makes a deal to help remove the collar, which IS the source of King's woes, placed by a 'mysterious wizard', I wouldn't be surprised if it was Obron AKA Proto-Belos.

What gets me is that Tibbles originally started off as a friend to the protagonists, while Bump was an antagonist! Coupled with Tibbles being re-elected as mayor after Bump is deposed for corruption. I like the detail of Bump being a parasite controlling a body from the head, because it carried over into his final design with Frewin, and before we got confirmation Frewin was a separate entity, I loved the joke theory that the imp on Bump's head was the REAL Bump!!! Seems that was always the implied story of the design, I love it. Tibbles being the demon fan of human stuff would eventually become Gus instead, so this is technically Proto-Gus too…?

Interesting how Bump and Tibbles' alignments switch completely with one another, and it makes sense that with Lilith no longer the principal in the final draft, it goes to Bump, who ends up being really chill and a subversion in his own right! Interesting, but I do prefer the final Bump we got, and that's fine by me, because when the concepts aren't as interesting as the final product, it means we got the best possible version.

I've already discussed Obron and William in a separate post, and Pupa is someone we've been told about in a previous livestream. Lilith would've been both head of all covens (and not just the Emperor's Coven) AND principal at the same time, and she seems much more of a jerk to Eda in general; She has no qualms with cursing Eda because of a direct order from Obron.

Apparently the curse would've been an AGING spell, which settles my questions on how it would've been portrayed in earlier drafts! This goes along with Eda's older look. Likewise, there would've been a subplot of Eda considering Luz's sacrifice as a way to restore her youth, which likely goes hand in hand with Obron's orders to bring Luz to her, etc. The 'Bloom of Eternal Youth' quest, which Eda and Lilith go through together as their sisterly relationship is explored, feels like a carryover from this past idea.

I think I prefer the final draft; I like that the curse isn't just aging Eda, but also takes away her magic, makes her turn into a beast, etc. I like Lilith being a lot more complicated in her relationship with Eda, instead of just hating her and cursing her without hesitation. The redefining of the curse makes it less about age, and more a chronic illness metaphor, and I like how Eda in the final draft is upfront about having to learn to live with it, deal with it, on her own terms. She isn't trying to find a cure (although Lilith being promised one by Obron feels like a carryover of Eda's moral dilemma with Luz), and that adds another nice dimension to her conflict with Lilith, as well as Gwen. It's pretty frank in its own right about normalizing disability, and those who play an antagonistic role (however brief) are the real weirdoes for making such a fuss about it.

The Bat Queen would've had more of a recurring role based on the description, which saddens me; I always got the vibe she was planned for more, but between all of the other stuff the show had to juggle, plus the shortening, she ended up getting shafted despite being one of the earlier characters. Sashley, Pasha, and Bruno are also interesting, with Pasha in particular giving me freaking Philip Wittebane vibes with his grossness, beard, and anti-demon attitude; He even starts off as a potential friend to Luz because fellow human, only for his true bigotry to show. Makes me wonder if Philip ended up incorporating Pasha, we also have bodily transformation because of consuming magical stuff... P-names.

(Also, I like how in the drawing of typical Demon Realm denizens, I can see an eye demon who resembles a past drawing of Dana's!!!)

Eda was actually a late bloomer, which creates a parallel with Luz in one way, and their relationship is referred to as sisterly (in the final draft it’s explicitly maternal). So Eda wouldn't have been the talented youth, in fact things may have switched between her and Lilith; Lilith's disdain may have partially come from Eda not being as innately talented as her.

Luz and Amity's dynamic seems like it would've had Amity retain a lot of her more stand-offish, pragmatic personality even as a friend with Luz, and this would've come up more; So basically, she'd remain more like S1 Amity. That, or this part of their relationship would've lasted longer, and then we would've seen character development as Amity unlearns a lot of the issues her parents passed on. I also wonder if the Willow who cameos in the pilot was originally supposed to just be an extra separate from ‘Paulina’, but then they combined the two together.

The themes are exactly as I expected, glad to see they're still there, nothing changed! Luz becoming a witch and defying all odds to do so, putting in real work and passion. Celebrating individuality amidst conformity, plus Luz trying to impose her own fictional tropes onto the world, only to have to put that aside... Just like Wing it like Witches. It seems Amity would've had more involvement with Luz's journey to become a witch, though we still do have a carryover of that disconnect with her rant near the end of Covention.

I love the Demon Realm being situated BELOW the Human Realm, way to be subtle about being Hell you guys lol... Apparently portals to the human world are a lot rarer to find and use, which makes me wonder if the pilot's 'dimension port' doesn't have access to the human world; Meaning Amity is Luz's only way back, so her improved relationship with her is linked to getting back home. There's a gag about the Knee having service with the human world, but I can see how that didn't make the cut, for dramatic purposes; It seems like the premise for a S1 episode or at least a B-plot. Would Luz have struggled to communicate with Camila through this, or would her search for wi-fi be for mundane reasons?

Apparently Luz's magic would've required a lot more steps to complete, and I see why the show simplified things down to just glyphs. I wonder if there was always going to be the connection of glyphs as a gift from the Titan, or if the Titan and her story was going to be less intertwined in the overall narrative. There also don't seem to be nine main covens, just the many, many covens, some of which are pretty ridiculous, and Covention's sub-covens seem a callback to that.

Luz's first spell would've been levitation, and THEN she would've infiltrated Hexside, with Amity being a lot subtler about exposing Luz, though in the final draft she does figure that out as the way to go in I was a Teenage Abomination. Yeah, I prefer Light being her original spell, feels so much more symbolic and personal, etc. I wonder if the Titan is even as much of a character in early drafts, and if there's still the whole connection/relationship with the land and learning to respect it aspect. Some of these hypothetical episodes push the idea of Amity as a more episodic, typical popular kid antagonist, though in the final draft, the show goes through her character development and explores Amity's romantic relationship with Luz and its complications.

It seems the idea of the Mirror Ghost was split into Adegast and Vee, with Adegast being the one who offers the easier narrative for Luz to believe in about becoming a witch (only to be a fraud who uses uncanny puppets), and Vee being a doppelganger whom Luz communicates through with mirrors. Interesting how Yesterday's Lie was born from this. We saw the test animation from Spencer Wan for TOH, so I guess we know what Luz's puppet-doppelganger is called! And we can safely call her Proto-Vee. I wonder if she also would've been a sympathetic character, I always thought she reminded me of Lake from Infinity Train (and speculated her to be as such since Enchanting Grom Fright), and now the similarities are even MORE apparent!

Alas, The Good Witch Azura, or 'The Unassuming Princess' seems like it'd have been a lot less dear to Luz's heart, as the pilot also reflects; In the end, it turns out the author is just Eda's ex using her adventures as basis, and including private information. I remember when I once speculated that Raine, before we saw their face, would've been just like this as the author of Azura... Again, I think I prefer Azura as being a lot less mean-spirited in the final draft, and instead a celebration of who Luz is as a person, her relationship with fantasy and fiction, etc. We also would've had a Luz birthday party, the Quincenera we've been hoping for since S1...! In the final draft (and episode) we still get that Human-Demon Realm disconnect, though by that point, Luz is much more attuned and chill with the isles.

There’s definitely more of an episodic, sitcom feel to this pitch bible, especially when you compare Proto-Yesterday’s Lie to its final version. Makes sense, Dana is pitching this to Disney executives, though her statement on Understanding Willow feeling truly like her show makes me wonder if she always intended to push TOH in that more serious, emotional route we got.

[risingphoenix24601]

Why (stage) Nessa is Ableist: An Essay

Disclaimer: I am disabled, but not a wheelchair user. I am chronically ill (EDS + all the bs that comes with it) and neurodivergent (ADHD, SPD, awaiting an Autism eval).

I will start with my personal perspective. My gripe with Nessa is that she is spoiled, her father favors her, and she expects everything to be done for her and soaks up everyone's pity. I'm not saying this never happens, but I feel like a lot of people just assume our parents coddle us and that our lives are easier, as if being disabled is some sort of advantage, and I've even seen us represented as going around looking for people entrap into helping us. When I was in high school, some kids found out I had a 504, became jealous (bruh, I'm jealous that you were born with high-speed internet brains) immediately assumed I was an arrogant prick who thought I deserved "special treatment," and took it upon themselves to make sure I felt like a burden. Believe me, being born into a world that doesn't know you exist is NOT an advantage.

Getting into more specific stuff: the movie did a great job correcting this, but since I'm talking about the stage version, I'm just going to list it: Elphaba's going to school just to care for Nessa, but I don't think she's in a position where she would need a full-time care-taker, so there's the trope of us entrapping people to do our bidding and that we're burdens on others (movie made clear that the dad is the asshole here and not Nessa). Second, many characters, some of whom don't know her at all, wheel Nessa around. You NEVER touch a person's mobility aids without their permission. Again, move fixed this. Third, Nessa says to Elphaba "I'm about the first happy night of my life!" Don't get me wrong, having a disability can really suck, but it doesn't mean our only emotion is misery. Plenty of disabled people live meaningful, fulfilling lives. My uncle has commented to me that he'd never guess I'm sick because "those people usually go around with a scowl." My uncle is Vietnam war vet. I'm sure if I knew half of the hell he went through, I would be shocked that he doesn't walk around with a scowl either-- but life goes on.

I'm going to address the controversy of the cure in Act II. Let me make this clear: plenty of disabled people want to be cured, and portraying someone who wants to be cured is not problematic. What is problematic, however, is that this is a very complicated topic and the show presents it in a way that is very simple. I'll use myself as an example: I would cure my EDS in a heartbeat, but neurodivergence, I honestly don't know. I am now at a point where I don't hate myself and actually like the way I am, but there are still days that I wish I was normal. I don't view my neurodivergence as a "gift" or another way of being, it is a disability and my life is harder because of it. And yet, I would be a completely different person without it. And I'm not sure if that's a person who I'd want to be.

We must remember that Nessa has been disabled since birth, this is her normal. And more than that, it's part of who she is. Suddenly being able to walk would be a massive change, and not necessarily a welcome one-- I think she would have the same fears that I have regarding fixing my neurodivergence. I also don't think Nessa is in a significant amount of pain or discomfort. So, ultimately, she is not disabled by her physical condition, she is disabled by the world around her.

This is, is my opinion, the biggest problem with the Wicked Witch of the East scene. Nessa's life is undeniably harder, but the lyrics incorrectly ascribe her suffering to her disability, when her suffering is actually caused by ableism. Also, wheelchairs are tools of accessibility. They are not bad or shameful things.

So yeah. I'm sorry that was long, but I've been seeing a lot of people asking about why it's ableist and there's no way to explain in one or two sentences, because this a complicated topic with complicated feelings. I hope I covered all the bases.

[lchufflepuffcorn]

Dragon hybrids with a chronically ill s/o

Hello anon ! As you have not identified yourself, I shall name you the🧑‍⚕️ anon! (Colour can change)

With chronically ill reader

Note: I have only a slime knowledge of chronic illness, and as such will not describe them too much. I've also chosen my favourites to write this imagine, but I'm willing to write for the other also, just name those you want to see!

Masterlist

Dragon!Hybrid Masterlist

Aemond: 

This man would be aware of this before even engaging with you. He knows everyone around him, even if he’s not that close to them. Aemond is paranoiac, which in itself is bad enough, but now that he’s into you? His mate?? Ooooh, it’s way worst. He will have the best Maesters whip out their knowledge in the hope to rid you of your Illness (sweet summer child, he’s not dumb but he’s not the brightest either). Will not listen to anybody telling him that the chances of you getting rid of the Illness is slime, instead will ask them if they’re revealing their shortcomings and lack of knowledge to their prince. 

Aemond doesn’t know how to react to you in your worst days. Sure, he’ll try to be comprehensive and open, understandable.But he’ll be panicking inside, he doesn’t know how to help you. 

Laying in bed, next to you, letting his warmth sooth, even if just a little bit the ache in your body, Aemond let you hide your face in the crook of his neck whilst Maesters busied themselves around you both. He’d been pulled out of a meeting  (as he requested) to be with you on this day. He could not bear to know you suffering alone. It shredded his heart to be so helpless. 

“I know, Qelos.” He whispered against your temple when you whined again. He tried to keep his voice steady, but feeling like he failed at that also. His throat felt like having twisted into a knot, much like his stomach, and he would never admit it out loud, be he felt the burning of tears on the edge of his lashes. 

There was a break in the sunlight Aemond’s closed eyes were used to, making him open his eyes and growl at the servant who had been standing too close, too fast of both of you. His grip on your body harder for a fractions seconds before he loosened it, apologising profusely in hushed murmurs as you’d reacted to him. 

Aemond would have the earth turned inside out if it meant finding a way to cure you. 

Baela:

Honestly, Baela would be the most cold-headed about the situation. She would rather you not be Ill, ever, and would prefer to take on your Illness, but that’s not something she can do, unfortunately. What she CAN do, however, is make your life just a little bit easier, and that’s what she settles for. You can’t walk good today ? That’s alright, people can come to us. Feeling drowsy ? She was just about to have floor time anyway. She would actively seek people to train dogs to help you out if she ever has to leave. 

Baela will not snap at people who mean to help you, except of course if she deem them to harsh while handling you. She keeps a close eye on you when she can, and has dogs trained to do her job when she cannot. Their is at least one of her lady that is trained in the medical field just to cover the time a Maester can be fetched. 

Jacaerys:

Will appear neutral, strong (even if concerned) in front of you, but is really an anxious recked inside and in front of the people he is most close of. If you have a bad day, he will tend to stay in bed with you. Or finish his duties as fast as he can to be reunited with you, if he can’t free his time. If you feel good enough to be out of bed, but bad enough not to want to engage in social activities, my boy’s got you. 

Jace is your shield during trying times. He will be your coat for winter days, and the sun of your rainy periods. Time man will find a way to make deserts into ocean just to please you, especially if it helps you fell better. No mountain is high enough. 

Taglist: @lady-dragon-rider

Current anon: 👑😵‍💫🥰🧑‍🍼😣 (🧑‍⚕️)

[kitthenameless]

I made this other post about the Emperor and Ansur once, but I had more things I wanted to say and couldn't quite fit in without muddying my point.

This is perhaps a bit of a reach, but this is not the first time I've found a portrayal of turning into a monster that I relate to as a chronically ill / disabled person who became ill later in life. It has nothing to do with feeling monstrous (I don't feel monstrous) or even body horror, and everything to do with how disabled people are treated by society and even those closest to us.

Obviously disabled people don't go around eating brains. We are not dangerous any more than abled people are. But becoming a mindflayer (or whatever monster) is comparable in the sense that, it can happen suddenly, and then your whole life is different, your body is not what it used to be (maybe visually, maybe the way it works or doesn't work now), and you need certain accommodations in order to thrive or even just survive. But people treat you differently now, you're not really given any help, and truthfully a lot of people would rather you just be dead. You're abandoned by society to figure out your new life and all its difficulties on your own. If you're lucky, you have some people who care enough to help you. If you're not lucky, you do the best you can in your desperation.

And that's why it feels so messed up to me that Ansur just gave up on Balduran/Emperor once he couldn't cure him. He clearly believes this is still Balduran, as shown by how he speaks to him when you meet him. So in his mind, he wasn't even trying to kill some creature that just had Balduran's memories. He was trying to kill Balduran. Who forcibly underwent a change to his body and accepted it and decided he still wanted a chance at living.

Edit to add: I'm pretty sure the Emperor even says it wasn't easy at first, so he didn't immediately embrace being a mindflayer. He came to accept it with some time, and that feels even more significant to me.

Like I said, I know becoming a mindflayer is not exactly the same as becoming disabled because mindflayers are dangerous. But also like I said, in my other post, the game shows us there are options to living ethically as a mindflayer. It's just that no one even helped the Emperor try to find them. And even so, he did his best on his own by eating criminals (which there is proof of, in a transcript).

I don't even blame him for disguising himself to the player at first. Look at how society treats freed mindflayers. Look at how the Emperor's own best friend and lover treated him. It makes perfect sense to assume we would hurt him or refuse to help him too.

Some people are so quick to forgive the companions for all the messed up things they've done because they have trauma. The Emperor has been through shit too though. He wouldn't admit to having trauma, but he was kidnapped, had his body forcibly changed, had his mind enslaved, had his lover try to kill him, had to kill his lover in self-defense, and was enslaved a second time. Sounds pretty traumatic to me.

Anyway. It's probably random to end this by talking about books, but that's what I do (literally, I also have a book blog), so. The other stories I also related to in this way were Dead Collections by Isaac Fellman (vampires) and Bored Gay Werewolf by Tony Santorella (werewolves). Maybe look 'em up, if you like that sorta thing.

[hyperfixationstation128]

So, we all know that the tadpoles pretty much "cure" their hosts' afflictions, right? Or at least puts them on pause.

For instance, Astarion's ability to walk in the sun was done by the tadpole. I can't remember if any of the other party members get this special treatment, but it did get me thinking:

If I, someone with a chronic illness and pain, were to be infected with that magical tadpole, would it rid my body (if only temporarily) of my illness? Would my connective tissue be replenished? My stomach aches cease? My constant dehydration and migraines? Would I stop dislocating my shoulders every time I pick up something heavier than a piece of paper? Would the bones in my legs stop bowing slightly whenever I step from a tall height?

If yes, then the next question is directed at myself: Would I be strong enough to let it go once everything is over? Would I be ready to go back to my constant aches and pains? I've never lived without pain. Not since I was a child.

I'd like to say I'd be strong enough to let it go. Of course I can do it! It's so easy! Like settling back into an old routine! Except... it isn't. It's more akin to momentarily lifting yourself off of poisoned spikes, but knowing you'll have to eventually lower yourself back into them. Old puncture scars reopening as you take your place in pain.

This got "rambly", but I've been thinking about this for the past few days, and I just had to get it out of my brain.

AND PLEASE FEEL FREE TO ADD ONTO THIS!!! I'd love to hear what others think!

[barksenji]

I've been pondering why I'm drawn to Killer as a character. I think he somehow mirrors my feelings about my body and health.

When considering disabled characters in One Piece, like Shanks or Kid (though there are more examples, maybe even better ones, lol), their disabilities play such a minor role in their lives that you might forget they even have one. It's not inherently negative, but it makes it challenging to connect with them in that sense because they don't truly experience the struggles.

Surprisingly, Killer stands out among the characters, showcasing the profound impact that eating the SMILE fruit had on him. He vividly portrays the hysteria and fear that can arise from losing control of your body, a part of yourself, whether through amputation or more abstractly, the loss of independence or freedom.

Killer is condemned to a lifetime of laughter; the effects of the SMILE won't be cured (maybe eventually they will, but I don't know). He copes, yes, but it's constantly going to be there. Sounds familiar? If you're chronically ill, you know.

Moreover, as someone dealing with dysphoria, there's a strong identification with Killer regarding the mask. The sensation of your face feeling so alien, prompting a desire to hide, isn't foreign to me; plenty of times I've wanted to put a bag over my head so I'd be able to just stop looking at my face.

In essence, Killer's character, encompassing his loyalty and more, evokes a powerful reaction in me. Yeah it sounds cheesy af I know, I'm autistic, what do you want from me, lol

[beasttheyeti]

Disabled in the UK

The benefits system in the UK has been terrible for a really, really long time. Surrounding the whole thing is a deliberately orchestrated sense of shame. Discussions revolve around who is worthy of support, rather than why the modern work environment is pushing so many people into poor health. They ignore the reality of long-term health conditions which have no cure or quick fix. Management, maintenance and stability should be emphasised far more when considering support systems.

I've been severely ill since 2003 (I refer to this time as 'my dark backstory' because things got very fucked up). The only long term work I have done was Sunday night stock counting for a supermarket during my final year of school. My mother worked there and filled in the application for me. I failed the personality test and only got the job because the role had no customer contact. Then I went to university (because that's what my school and parents expected) and clawed my way through a degree while battling chronic depression, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Then I hit a wall. I was so unwell that I could no longer mask how bad it was. I started getting treatment - meds and therapy helped but I needed to learn to be a person again because all the masking I had learned and relied on did not work. I was anxious and on edge most of the time. I took a leave of absence from postgrad studies and then dropped out. I lost my therapist to NHS restructuring in 2013. In some ways I was fortunate that my parents were willing and able to cover my basic needs financially, so I wasn't homeless and I had food. However, they actively discouraged me from applying for Jobseekers Allowance because they had such a negative impression of people who did. Being unwell, relying on my parents' goodwill when contact with them caused flashbacks, severe conflict of needs with housemates, feeling like a failure for dropping out and not understanding how to find employment took a massive toll on my health. In 2014 I developed a neurological disorder which crippled me (didn't get a diagnosis until 2023). I lost the use of my left side and spent most of my time trying to ward off the pain with heatpads and codine. I've got some significant memory gaps from around then. In 2015 a Primary Care Mental Health Nurse helped me to fill out the paperwork for Employment and Support Allowance (ESA) and I was placed in the Support Group. All I was told was that I wasn't allowed to do 'work-related activity' and if I had savings over £15,000 I'd lose eligibility. It turns out there was also a soft limit of £6000 where they could decrease payments by up to £90 a week. I found that out in 2020, from another person on the same benefit. I had one reassessment. It was very stressful. Since then I've had constant background fear of another reassessment. At the time the nurse and I agreed that I was not well enough to apply for Personal Independence Payment (PIP) because the process was even more onerous than that for ESA (it was very likely you'd need to go to tribunal to get anything). Then the NHS restructured some things and I lost the support of the nurse.

I sort of pootled along with just ESA and housing benefit from the local council. For years the ESA payments were frozen but my bills went up with inflation, so the squeeze got a little bit tighter. My parents covered the excess cost of bills and later my food too as it became apparent that there wasn't enough (if you're under 35 then housing benefit only covers the cost of a place in a shared house). I tried another course of therapy but didn't get on with the therapist. We had different aims for the outcome of treatment and he refused to use tactile instead of visual prompts, so I had a lot of very intense flashbacks and dissociative episodes with little progress to show for it. He made it clear that he thought my pain was caused by me being obese and that I was over-exaggerating. We eventually parted ways. In 2017 we finally got me onto meds that did something and I worked with the Pain Team to regain mobility on my left side. It was slow, tiring and painful. I had to fight to be taken seriously because of my weight (they were surprised when I reached a healthy weight and was still in acute pain). It wasn't until 2018 when a different service demanded that I have counselling before progressing to treatment that I was linked to my current support worker. I was in a very bad place when we first met. We've done a lot of work together to establish trust and play to my strengths rather than trying to jam me into a framework. She supported me in getting an autism diagnosis. She talked me though my worries about applying for Personal Independence Payments (PIP) and found practical resources for me. PIP itself is a shitshow. Everything about the process is designed to make you give up and twist your words to avoid giving you anything. My assessment meeting took nearly 3 hours. I got 8 points, 2 in 4 categories. If the proposed changes are made, I'd lose PIP. I've used the money from PIP to pay for:

replacement parts for my crutches and walking stick

better quality food and pre-chopped vegetables

food deliveries when I can't leave the house or physically carry shopping

earplugs

communication cards

pill organisers

whiteboards to help with memory issues

bus and taxi fares

food when I'm out and start to crash

a disabled railcard

a shopping trolley

a heatpad

a lightweight camping chair

over the counter medication

travel costs for people assisting me

exercise equipment for physio

a basic gym membership

swimming sessions

Along with PIP I also started to get Severe Disability Allowance, which apparently I should have had for a long time and didn't. My quality of life massively improved. I can pay my bills. I've been able to engage with support groups in my local community. I've had the space to test the boundaries of what I can do and what is too much. I still have a lot of downtime from pain or exhaustion. There are things I cannot do where assistance is non-existent or so hard to access that it might as well not be there. My ESA has just been migrated to Universal Credit, with a convoluted name for the equivalent of the Support Group. I've also got the 3 year review paperwork for PIP (it feels like it hasn't been enough time, but that's because I went through the tribunal process and that took until the year after to resolve). I am expecting more stress and pressure in the near future, none of which is going to help me into work. After more than ten years being too unwell to work, coming up to ten years on disability benefits, I don't know what support I need in order to engage with paid employment. I've never managed to get a long term job by myself. I have no idea where I could get support even if I knew what I needed. I don't think an employer is going to want someone who occasionally does All the Things and then vanishes for a week. What happens if these cuts go through will not be a surprise. We know what happens when you remove support from people who are struggling. We don't magically find the health and energy to work. We get worse. Some of us die.

[mono-dot-jpeg]

lost and sick - express crew

summary; being part of the underground meant you lived an unstable life and it was hard to erase.

genre/extra tags; one shot, fluff, angst, teen! reader, no dialogue fic, reader is from jarilo v

word count; 440

[platonic] [teen! reader] [gender neutral! reader]

[warnings; chronic illness, reader does not like being touch and makes it obvious, children experiments, death of parents, mentions of torture (but never talked abt any deeper)]

a/n; you'd think with all the time I've been on genshin (idk how long but too long), i would take the time to learn more of the characters. but to be fair i stopped playing when sumeru first released. i played like a decent chunk of it, then i stopped. uhh, well, hope you enjoy anyways.

being a citizen of the great mine sucked. a lot of it sucked. and a lot of it was traumatizing.

being forcefully tested on, pushed down to your tiny limit as a kid, trying to sway your naive brain that this was fine, and trying to convince you that you would be cured.

if only it was that easy.

if only it didn't take years for someone to find out about the secret circle of fake doctors that were "curing kids" just to get a quick buck out of parents.

your parents were long gone after you got worse. they ran out of money and out of time.

but you were found, broken, lost, and ill. you were taken to natasha immediately.

you told them your origins, albeit not all of it. and you were taken in by a mysterious group, the astral express, trailblazers; they called themselves.

you went wary. extremely so.

they understood. they thought, this young teen is lost without a parent and support, and now they're getting it? they would be wary too. it looked too good to be true after your experiences of torture and anguish.

you kept your distance. well... as much distance as you could when you were ill. some days, you would find yourself with the energy to walk around and care for yourself for most of the day. and other days, you would be bedridden, unable to move as you feel like you were stuck in that damned lab again, numb and unable to fight.

it was.. a struggle.

the crew was extremely patient with you. it was almost embarrassing to you. having them to be so nice to you even if you avoided them as much as possible, it made you feel bad for them. but.. it's not like they knew anything about the labs. they just knew that you were a broken kid needing a home. and they wanted to try and provide that.

maybe it was time to really tell them everything.

and you did.

you told them, the horror you lived through, how your life was ticking faster than others because of it, how you were forced to deal with unwanted shots and lab tests.

they were in shock but they were proud that you had spoken to them about it. and after that you opened up to them a little more.

you started to find a way to embrace your short life with the help of the astral express.

and you don't mind living this short life if you know that you have a family who love you dearly and gave you the home you deserved.

[vip-komilk]

⚠ TW: Sibling incest ⚠ Huge-ass leonfrancis headcanons post, including NSFW. If you read my fics, or just follow my nonsense on twitter/bluesky, these are the headcanons I'm leaning on most of the time. Take a look inside my twisted mind. This is more insane than the Vittorino one.

I'm putting it under a readmore for a reason, this is my disclaimer. Thanks.

Conceptual headcanons

This is the pretentious shit. Idk how else to say it. It's all the symbolism and references to folklore and stuff like that LOL.

THE GENERATIONAL CYCLES. This one is first because it is at the core of all the bullshit that will come after, so I need to hit you over the head with this one. 8:11 has a theme around cycles and I theorize that Leon and Francis are cycles of their parents. That's it basically. Leon picked up the hunting and surgery skills from his father. Leon kills his father in very much the same way Dante (who it's implied was something like a protégé or even a son) kills him. Their mother had a chronic illness and was intent on one of them (presumably Francis) becoming a priest, Francis then becomes traumatized and bedridden after her death. Leon falls into the role of his father, Francis into the role of his mother. Do you see the vision? This one is important.

Merge theory. If you've been in 8:11 fandom for a bit you'll have heard of this one, the idea that Leon and Francis merged at some point; presumably it was something Leon did in an attempt to "cure" his brother. You'll see me allude to this with ideas of them "becoming one" (yes, including sex).

I've played on the literary/spiritual concept of twins being split from a single "soul", they they are two halves of a whole, that they are incomplete without each other. Hence the aforementioned merge theory is more a rejoining of these split souls.

Cain and Abel. Why the hell not. I'll get into a bit more later but I do sometimes like to play with the idea that Leon really resented having to look after Francis, really resented his "ailments" when there appeared to be nothing physically wrong with him. The idea that Leon might have wanted to kill him at times, just to free them both; the idea that perhaps his father had felt the same towards their mother, even if he never expressed it.

---

General headcanons

I don't feel strongly one way or the other as to whether they're identical or fraternal twins, but them having different hair textures makes me lean towards the latter (ignore the split soul theory being for identical twins, its my beautiful dreamscape and I can do what I want). I think their features are similar enough that people think they're identical at first glance though.

I tend to characterize Francis as a grumpy cat LOL. He's kind of antisocial and withdrawn, when he's mad he tends to give the cold shoulder. He has a kind of stern, quiet compassion, and when he can tell Leon is stressed out, he'll just silently start cleaning up Leon's stuff and bringing him food and things like that. Real acts of service love language going on.

From the game it appears to me like they lived in a secluded, rural area. The Tremblays maybe had limited interactions with people outside the family, the boys would maybe take a bus to school, and they would go into town on the weekends and for church but it's not as if they spent a lot of time surrounded by people. This is kind of important in setting up the context for Leon and Francis becoming isolated after their parents die.

They were probably the kind of kids that made up their own language to communicate with each other. I think it would be cute if Francis kind of clung to Leon when they went to school (until they get to the age when being close to your sibling isn't Cool and 'I'm more than just my brother's twin actually').

Re: the whole 'children are more or less incarnations of their parents' thing above, Leon is favoured by their father as the eldest to more or less take up the role of the Man Of The House. Their dad was probably a serious guy, considering he was both a war veteran and a surgeon, so those are big shoes to fill. On the other hand, Francis is more of a momma's boy, spends a lot of time with their mother at her bedside, makes sure he tells her everything he and Leon are up to.

Based on VHS #2, the hunting motifs and the forest imagery towards the end of the game, I think it's fair to assume their house sat at the edge of a forest. Leon and Francis probably spent a lot of time out there as kids and teens, exploring and finding animal bones and setting up forts of branches and foliage. They probably got lost out there once or twice. Maybe they trespassed on their neighbour's land and got shot at. I like to think of Leon with a big VHS camcorder making "documentaries" of the stuff they make out there.

Francis starts smoking (weed). The first time he convinces Leon to try it, Leon gets really paranoid and doesn't leave the couch for hours. Needless to say he's not eager to do it again.

---

After their parent's death

Includes NSFW towards the end.

Uhhh I headcanon that Leon's drinking habit starts after he kills his father. I do think it's just as likely it could've started after the fall of the Basilica, but I really like the idea of Leon struggling with it in secret while at the Basilica lol.

They both have a lot of trauma, and struggle to process it and confront it. Francis starts talking about ghosts and Angels, loses his eyesight, becomes bedridden. Leon is likely forced to look after him in the aftermath, while I'm sure he's also haunted by the fact he killed his own father. And yet, however much Leon might resent Francis for his condition, how can he possibly abandon the only remaining family he had left? Especially when it was his mistake that drove Francis to be like this in the first place. And Francis is helpless; he's blind and ill and he relies on Leon completely. Leon fears Francis for the crazy things he's saying, and Francis fears Leon who returned home soaked in their father's blood. They have both become unrecognizable to each other, they both have reason to be wary and suspicious and yet horribly codepedent on each other.

Even something as simple as Leon leading Francis around the house, or bathing him, or shaving him. How easy it would be for him to push him down the stairs or slit his throat as he holds a razor to his neck. I like to thing the tension and the dread in that house is a constant weight on them both.

Leon avoiding mirrors is obviously him avoiding Dante in the game, but I think perhaps we should consider it could also be tied to guilt at seeing his brother's face in his reflection.

(NSFW - dub/non-con) If you've read my fic "If we fall," I emphasize the guilt I think Leon would probably feel for this whole situation and wouldn't really be able to bring himself to stop Francis from acting out against him, and just lies back and takes it.

(NSFW - dubcon) Leon drinks every night so that if anything happens (coughs having sex with his bedridden brother), he can deny to himself that he was in his right mind.

This is where the Cain and Abel thing comes back into play. Sometimes Leon resents Francis. It’s a burden to have to look after him. He's an unsettling, haunted husk of a human being, and he wonders if their father ever felt this way about their mother. If he secretly yearned to snap her neck, to free himself from the chains binding him to her. Some nights when Leon drinks and Francis sleeps he stands at the doorway glaring at him, caught in uncertainty, unsure if he loves him or hates him.

This one's a bit delusional but a few friends and I were throwing around the idea of Francis getting paranoid and trying to escape the house, but of course he's blind so he doesn't get far. Gets his leg caught in an animal trap set up in the woods and has to lie there as the sun sets, shivering and bleeding and unable to free himself until Leon comes to find him and brings him back home, now with an injured leg and even more reliant on Leon to help him.

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Transfem Francis

Yes this needs its own section.

It started because a friend put me on to it but again, the parallels to the parents kind of just strengthened it for me. If Francis is meant to take on the role of his mother then why can't that include his gender? //taps temple//

I think she starts transitioning before their parents die, but she starts to present more outwardly feminine only after. She starts rifling through her mother's clothes and wearing them, and again Leon is kind of just too shaken and guilty to stop her. (I feel the need to clarify that Leon's shock would not be Francis wearing feminine clothes but more that she's wearing their dead mother's belongings).

Leon starts to treat her a lot more carefully (you can't just roughhouse with a sister like you can with a brother, in his mind). He fixes her shirts if they start slipping down too far and showing too much chest. Francis thinks it's annoying as hell.

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The real delusion

This is the insane stuff I'm sorry in advance. Includes NSFW.

If you want the real delirium, there's a whole alternate au in my head where Leon never performs the merging surgery and never goes to the basilica and instead he and Francis kind of just get mind-broken by their circumstances and lean into the cycled roles of their parents as a means of survival and become horribly codependent on each other and convince themselves they love each other the way their parents did. If you ever see me talk about them being married or acting like a couple I'm probably referring to this "parent roleplay" au lol.

They should get married in the garden and Francis should wear her mother's wedding dress, beautiful wonderful world.

me and a friend went crazy talking abt them going to a local farmer's market together as a couple and some of the older vendors mistake them for their parents. She hangs onto his arm and asks him to describe things for her. They go to a barn dance and dance together. Agh. Sobs.

Incestuous codependent delusion aside, they can be the cutest couple ever i think.

Thanks for making it this far //blows kisses//