#I feel like I haven’t made my own post on this blog in forever

[sull-shipping]

he makes me so happy

[cyncerity]

HAPPY 3 YEARS TO THIS BLOG!! 🎉💕🫶

i’m so happy i’ve been a part of this little community for as long as i have. everyone is super nice and inspiring and unbelievably talented, and im so glad to be posting content with people like y’all.

it’s absurd to think i’ve been doing this for 3 years and that i almost have 800 people here seeing it, but the love and support i’ve received over these years has been incredible. given that this is such a small community and i’ve either spoken with most of you or have at the very least interacted with your content, i feel confident in saying that every single person here is incredible in their own right and truly are the reason i stay here. you guys are genuinely the best, even if i forget to answer your asks or sometimes leave you on read for a while (i do that with everyone i’m so sorry) i mean it when i say that i do consider a good portion of you my friends. even if it’s been a while since we messaged or talked, you’re all awesome. and if i don’t know you personally, please feel free to message me! i love making friends, especially in a community like this that has time and time again proven to have some of the genuinely nicest people on the internet <3

i love writing and drawing and i’m not leaving here for a long while yet. the asks i’ve received saying that i inspired people to write, draw, or post are some of the nicest things i’ve ever received, and i truly mean it from the bottom of my heart when i say that those have changed my life. the self confidence and love for my craft that i’ve gained from being here is immeasurable, and that’s thanks to all of you, whether you’ve been here for years or are new to this blog.

given that this is an anniversary thing, i wanna thank @bittydragon, @baka-monarch, @wendy130, @darkeninganon, and @awesome-slime-lover for introducing me to this community. i was stalking their blogs on google far before i had an account here, and i only made an account so i could send them fanart, so you have them to thank for dragging me here lmao

i also wanna tag @plant-gt-thought-box, @kayla-crazy-stuffs, @blurrybunnie, @apersonstories, @funtimemoth, @mysticalblue09, @corysmiles, @pixy-stix-art, + some others who are not on tumblr anymore for being friends with me and actually being some of the kindest and funniest motherfuckers. Ik i haven’t spoken to some of you in forever, and i hope this isn’t coming off as parasocial, but you guys are awesome and i wish you nothing but the best (and if you wanna message more or get on vc again some time please lmk cause i am a social wuss)

and if i’m gonna list people i might as well tag the people who even if i don’t know as well, are all super talented and leave me marveling at everything they post on here (whether or not you post mcyt g/t anymore, you’re all still incredible creators who make me want to improve my own work): @eyes-eye-eyes (my /p wife <3), @wren-writes68, @jkknight98, @arc852, @brick-a-doodle-do, @oh-i-need-a-name, @quotemenevervore, @melissa-s23, @i-am-beckyu, @random-tinies, @archaxwii, @itty-bitty-rainbow, @goosedawn, @beansthough, @make-a-memory, @aslitheryprinx, @avengerofsquids, @thatoneteadrinker666, @shushiyuii, @x-pair-o-dice-x, @jammanthejam, @trouble-off-grid, @lunar-but-little, @frickfrackiwastakingabath, @chequered-career, @bio-nerds-corner, @dingbatnix, @cottoncandythetrashpanda, @sprite-addicted-artist, @colossal-red, @sheena-yuet, @quackxolotl, @local-squishmallow, @nobodywritingao3, @deity-of-keys, @astraymetronome, @a-xyz-s, and tumblr has now told me that i’ve hit the max of 50 mentions so i will have to reblog this with the rest of you (crazy to think that there’s that many of y’all but i really do want to shout out everyone) (also if you’re one of these blogs that doesn’t post mcyt anymore and don’t want yourself associated with it, just lmk and i will remove your tag from my list, just know that your previous work in this community was admired and appreciated <3)

also can’t forget the anons and the followers that aren’t outwardly a part of this community (don’t have g/t blogs, don’t have mcyt blogs, or just don’t post in general). i’m lucky enough that i’ve never received hate from an anon before, everything you guys have ever sent is so nice and you also have great ideas! I am so sorry if it takes me forever to share those ideas publicly, but know that each of you are appreciated. and for my followers, i truly wouldn’t be anywhere without you guys, so thank you for supporting me <3

anyway, i might be getting over sentimental about all this, but 3 years is a long time, and over that time i’ve grown very attached to this little group of creators and i just wanted to let you know how loved and appreciated you are

💕💖🫶💕✨

[byghostface]

//long rambling

There is a vent in the last part (about pro ship:/+ wired shipping + block list) it's naturally negative so reading at your own risk.

So in the new Batman and Robin issue #7 Nika's sister making an appearance, got me thinking of other possibilities for sibling characters to come back.

Mostly I’m thinking about Respawn since he is Joshua Williamson's own character. And He made Respawn appeared in the last issue of Robin(2021), he also brought back Mara in that run too (just some appearance in the later issue).

And now Joshua Williamson is writing Batman and Robin, so naturally he can bring some characters back in this run. He had said in an interview that he might have figured out a way(try) to bring back Maya.

Throwback to 2022 of this old wip/art I made, is about what I think the emo teens of Lazarus squad dynamic would look like.

I imagine Nika and Respaw are irritated/tolerate with each other but would stay for Damian because Nika is Damian's girlfriend and they want to stick together. Meanwhile, Damian likes to include his half-brother in some fun activities (Respawn is acting reluctant bc of his own issues but he actually likes to have friends and feel include).

I haven’t finished this art bc I was going to add more wips (with other characters like Rose and Hawke) to make it a post. I didn't finish this art back then bc I was afraid Talia fans would be mad at me for drawing Respawn.

Trust me, I hate that Talia gets associated with Deathstroke like this, but I think Respawn is a confused/mistreated teen character and Damian (bless his heart and soul) still wants to be his brother regarding the whole mess. I will explain/talk more about my thoughts on Respawn as a character and his situations once I finish these drawings and get ready to post them.

Writing/typing words is harder than drawing for me personally. Drawing is like channeling my energy into a picture and forming an atmosphere and hopefully people will understand what thoughts and feelings I was trying to convey. Writing is using more brain powers to choose the correct and cohesive words, so people would not misunderstand what I'm talking about. Especially when English is not my first language, and even so I normally don't talk(write) much in my mother tongue either…(I'm not a quick thinker, it took me a longer time to think things through, writing literally exhausted me physically and mentally more than drawing.)

It doesn't mean I don't enjoy writing, it's just not my first choice to convey thoughts… but considering I can't draw everything I have in my mind and it takes even longer time to finish any art, I just need to write down things first from now on. Tumblr is the only place I can think of that has this longer text feature blog post and I'm more familiar with this platform format. So I will still be here posting my fan content.

.

(↓Vent, if you want to avoid being block by me then read down below.)

I must say I will forever hate respawn x flatline as ship, cus I know who started this ship and their reasons behind it—Don’t let the new character develop naturally as the story goes, let’s put them in made-up weird situations first so I can prop up my own ship!😍 And get both of the new characters out of the way, since no one would defend them so I can fanon the hell out of them by making them look bad all around!🤞 (What if I stone you first hand🪨🪨💥)

And I will continue to dislike/against any shipping Damian's sibling to Nika. I simply don't like the unnecessary sibling conflict just for romance tropes! So go away boooo I hate you‼️ Not to mention the ignoring of different age range multi-ship hide behind poly… that's straight up proshipping I hate you even more!!👎

Also for people who said Nika should be crush on Damian's mother instead of him… I hate you twisted proshipper rotten smooth brain‼️‼️ She dating a boy her age and has mutual connections with him, why would she crush on her boyfriend's mother instead?? Just because Nika is a big fan of Talia??? So you telling me young ppl can't idolize adults normally without being labeled as romantic nowadays huh??( Not saying you can't crush on adults, but why crush on your boyfriend's mom? ) Your weird ass mind is showing with this ass hc be fr. Again, why would you imagine that? You just wanted to push a fake narrative of Nika being wired so you could have an excuse to make Talia and Damian dislike her (which is not true), but in fact is YOU are the weird one projecting your twist thoughts/hate onto Nika‼️💥🪨🪨

I will start to block ppl who are shipping/liking respawn x flatline (+proshipper) and STILL interact with me, read the room!! My art is not for you weirdos‼️Go away BOOOO💥 🪨🪨🪨💥💥

Can't believe I need to type this all out cuz some of you weirdos will still do these things and think is okay to interact with me and my post/showing in my notifications BOOO👎🪨🪨💥🪳🪳🪳🩴🩴🩴

(sorry for venting about random weirdos/Nika haters again, and thanks for reading.)

[ryuichirou]

RE: Ortho (+Shroudcest) post replies

Phew, alright, I think I didn’t skip anyone. If I did, I’m sorry, I’ll reply to you next time then!

Thank you so much for your wonderful messages of support and for your takes. I really appreciate it! I say it all the time but it saying it again feels appropriate: we had no idea we would ever see so many people who share our point of view despite not shipping Ortho with Idia or any other character. The fact that we can have this conversation really makes me happy.

You are welcome to share more of your thoughts if you want, but unfortunately I might not be able to reply to everyone. I will do my best though.

All of the asks in this blog are related to this post.

Anonymous asked:

Different anon, I think Ortho is in this nebulous situation like superboy in young justice who is physically 16 years old but chronologically 16 weeks old. I genuinely hate the uwu babying of characters. The dwarfs are all second years(so theoretically 17 at the youngest) but no one makes anything with them. Heck the characters I see get lewded the most are the octo trio who are the same age.

Heck, even Grim gets the baby mascot treatment by fans when he's also lumpedwiththefirst years. Like yes, he's a whiny brat but he's also grown up all alone as far as he can remember. I can't help but compare him to Puppycat who acts similarly and is a grown ass man.

Yeah, this probably plays a role too! Ironically, we were just having this conversation about Stitch the other day lol Being new to the world you exist in (and to existing in general) and being a baby aren’t necessarily the same thing.

And even in that case Ortho doesn’t fully fit into the trope because he was created quite a while ago and is already pretty well adjusted. But since he is still learning and doesn’t always understand people + doesn’t always get things like sarcasm, people consider it to be a proof that he is a toddler lol Who am I kidding, their reasoning doesn’t even go that far. They say “he died when he was a baby therefore he is a baby forever” and call it a day.

I feel bad for people who love Grim, I haven’t even thought about it… The Puppycat comparison is so spot-on lol

Grim is inexperienced and doesn’t know much about the world, but yes, he is one of the freshmen + just as he at times acts like a whiny brat, there are also times when he tells Ace that he should be more considerate of Deuce’s feelings, like wtf was that? That was Grim. Because Grim also isn’t a baby, he is a furry gremlin…

Anonymous asked:

As one of the most avid Ortho stans, it really is a pet peeve that people act like he's a little kid

You're so right that it's people that want to write him like Idia's little convenient plot device

I do want to note that it's also sometimes just the infantilization of an autistic coded character

God forbid he be somewhat optimistic, this must mean he's just an innocent baby /s

One small thing that gets me: Ortho can and has made his own gears!! Idia doesn't need to and maybe this is inspired by a post I saw that used the fact that Idia has made his stuff to take away Ortho's agency in what is supposed to be him having a tattoo analog. Not having a character be the architect of their own body mod equivalent is wild and I just.

He's a silly little guy, but he's not a fucking baby!

Indeed, Anon. I feel like people either completely ignore Ortho or see him as Idia’s appendix. I absolutely love them together, and of course I am biased towards scenarios that focus on their deep codependence, but I also really love how they get to have their own adventures, their own relationship, their own experiences separate from each other. Because they are wow, different characters, and Ortho has his own agency. He had it even before ch6, but after that he fully and officially became his own person. Being with Idia is his choice, not his only option. And just like you mentioned, he makes his own gears pretty much all the time now… even though I don’t agree that Idia making his gears has anything to do with Ortho’s agency.

I don’t even think Ortho is that optimistic. He is a little sunshine, but not even close to people like Kalim for example. Ortho even has his own cynical moments and douchy moments that people also tend to ignore. But even if he was 100% optimistic and naïve, it still would not be a valid reason to infantilise him. And you are absolutely right, people do that a lot. With Kalim too, actually, now that I think about it.

Anonymous asked:

Aaaaah, Ryuichi, after reading your post (rant) about Ortho, made me very happy! I'm glad there's someone else who shares the same opinion. The number of fans who infantilizes Ortho is beyond me. I absolutely hate the argument Ortho's mentally "8 years old" it's like they completely forget his storyline.

I'm guessing that the people who genuinely believe the theory that he's "8 years old" are younger fans with no media literacy so no hate towards them but it's frustrating when fans pretend it's Canon when it's not.

Not only that but it’s so sad to see how he's also so mischaracterized by the fandom. He's always seen just as Idia's little brother but never himself despite the fact that Ortho's life doesn't revolve around Idia. He has his own interest and hobbies different from Idia AND he is NOT innocent! Fans tend to forget this is a game about a school full of villains and that includes Ortho too! If I remember correctly Ortho has multiple times tried to blow up the school with his laser! He's violent! He's not a kid.

Unfortunately, I've seen this kind of stuff happening across all fandoms this isn't exclusive to Twisted wonderland. Heck a few months ago I've seen fans in the black butler genuinely believe that Ciel's in fact 9 years old instead of 13 year old!? And then they call us weird? The SebaCiel shippers? Like why do YOU want him to be younger?? I'm getting too old for this.

Thank you so much, Anon! I am happy you also agree.

I don’t hate younger fans, and I know that some people might be genuinely confused; but I also believe that there are a lot of people that simply do not care about Ortho’s actual story and any arguments one could make about this case. The actual issue isn’t Ortho being a certain age, it’s a pretext, an excuse, an invitation to harass. If Ortho didn’t exist, they would still do it with other characters, and even if all the characters were adults, they would still find a reason to do so, like, for example, their appearance. There is no winning in this game, this is why factual arguments won’t work even if Ortho Shroud himself looks in the camera and says “hi, I don’t care if people ship me with my niisan, I am also in fact not 8 years old”.

I am also very glad you mentioned Ortho being his own person! I mentioned it in a previous reply, so I won’t talk about it, but yes, you are absolutely right. Ortho is a menace, and all of his disappointed “come ooon, niisan, don’t do that” moments come from his desire for Idia to have more friends, not because he genuinely cares for other people. He clearly doesn’t – hence his multiple attempts to blow up the school lol

I love it when characters just keep getting younger with every single wave of this shitstorm. Didn’t you know he is 13? How dare you post something like that about a 9 years old! He is a toddler who is only 3 months old! That’s one powerful fountain of youth right there. Antis in Kuroshitsuji fandom do that a lot, just as antis in TWST fandom.

Anonymous asked:

I really feel bad for people who have Ortho as their oshi. It's not like fans of other characters don't get shit on too, apparently pretty much everyone is an immoral heathen these days, but I feel like Ortho gets often excluded in fan content, especially when it features any mature theme.

Also, if you a problem with people liking Ortho in the same way as they do with the rest of the guys, you should take your issues to the creators, since that was definitely their intention when they put him in the pretty boy gacha. Or maybe just play another game.

Anyway Ryu and Katsu, keep doing your thing, cause you guys are awesome!

What I love about it is that Ortho himself would be so pissed if he learned that all the other guys get to do fun mature stuff and he doesn’t lol That’s so not fair, he’s charging his lasers as we speak!

Also yes, it was absolutely the creators’ intention. He is supposed to look like that, just like Lilia is supposed to look like that – both caused confusion in the game story with how young they look, and yet both are a big part of the cast (+ As we know, even Idia was supposed to be younger looking…). Ortho has one of the biggest amounts of cards, he is clearly a popular character, not just a lovely addition or a mascot. 

Thank you so much for your support, Anon <3 It means a lot. This shit might be upsetting, but it will never stop us from creating.

Anonymous asked:

While I am not an Ortho/Idia shipper, I do like your art pieces because your art style is straight-up gorgeous. So when I do see your Shroudcest art Im like: not my cup of tea but I respect the time and effort made into this. (And here is my rant siding with you bc they are fictional characters)

The babyfication of Ortho is something I do not understand. As much as Idia made RoBro in trauma, rn I doubt he wants RoBro to remain stagnant in mind and hardware. With Ortho's ability to learn, he is practically a teenager like the rest. He displays more emotional maturity than most ppl despite his killer laser beam. Kindness, hope, and optimism are traits not limited to children. Shortness is also not limited to children. If we treat other characters by traits often shared by children, then Neige's fellow dwarf classmates are also children. What they don't count bc they are not human? Ortho is not human either. Similarly, Kalim and Silver display positive internal traits of kindness, hope, and optimism. Shortness? Well, we got Grandpa Lilia and the Napoleon complex twins Riddle and Epel. They are all teenagers (minus Lilia) and no one is babying them.

...And are we ignoring all the shit he has seen on the internet. The amount of porn (from adult sites and even the soft-core types you can even find by watching some twitch/yt streamers) that can be seen. Videos of violence, crimes, and ppl doing their best to win the Darwainism Award. Ortho could access and go through like 5 terebytes by the time I reach page two of Google.

As for the Shroudcest, they are fictional characters! You can go straight to phub and have incest type (the sheer amount of the step family porn troupe) porn being acted out by actual breathing people. Do you want to metaphorically die on this hill of ppl shipping fictional 2D characters? Are we just going to ignore you targeting this harmless ship? At least go for a larger target like Game of Thrones or House of Dragons. So much incest in those media that it has it's own fan wiki page, but you don't see ppl go for George R. R. Martin's throat for writing about characters willing or unknowingly committing incest.

It is like people reading/watching media of horror movie killers. It's something you can enjoy or have a preference for because you, as a sane person, will not become a serial killer. AND, as a productive member of society, you condemn actual, real-life serial killers. You read horror stories or watch scary movies for entertainment value not for a guide to be one. Similar logic to furries. Furries consider anthropomorphic creatures as hot, but those same furries are against beastilaity.

TL;DR: While I am not personally a fan of incest or shota type of media, I do not mind they exist (or go after creators who use FICTIONALLY characters to enhance their form of FICTIONAL media), bc they are FICTIONAL CHARACTERS from a FICTIONAL MEDIA. Stop with the performative activism. Use that effort and go after people who do it for real in real life. If you prevent/stop an actual crime from happening, I will applaud and thank you! AND I DOUBT I WILL BE THE ONLY ONE.

Thank you so much, Anon! I am happy that you like my stuff despite not shipping some of our ships. I am very grateful for the respect, and also for your message! I really like your points and I’ll go through them briefly.

The entire part about all those traits not being exclusive to children + about other characters having those traits but still not being babied – YES, thank you so much for that. Like I already mentioned, the game clearly plays with those tropes, and even though the characters are young-looking, they are still of high school age (other than Lilia). Ortho is weird, Ortho is different from some of the other boys, but all of them are weird in their own way, Ortho is just a robot. If we can make “not a human” excuse for the dwarves, why can’t we look at Ortho that way? And yes, Ortho absolutely knows stuff a kid wouldn’t be able to digest lol All of his difficulties come from him being an AI – he doesn’t always get sarcasm, he doesn’t fully understand why people do certain things and doesn’t understand some limitations of human’s body and mind; none of it is tied to him being childish or too innocent.

Incest in media is very popular indeed, and it’s SUPER popular in porn! You are right. If any kind of media ends up “normalising” this kind of relationship, it definitely won’t be shippers of incest. But also that won’t happen because wow, it doesn’t work that way. People love to say that fiction affects reality, and while in a way it does, it’s never a “everyone is going to start shooting people because the videogames brainwashed them” type of deal, and this is exactly what they’re doing with their arguments. It’s fear-mongering, moralism and ignoring the fact that people do in fact know how to separate fiction from reality. And the key to making sure no one is going to jump out the window because their favourite character did so isn’t in censorship, but in people learning this difference and always keeping in it mind. Ironically, that would mean that people who harass others over cartoons can’t make this separation very well because of their lack of critical consumption of media; but then again, they can’t even see (and don’t care, which makes it worse and my point stronger) how their own reckless actions seriously affect real people in real life, and I think this is a more important issue to resolve lol

Unfortunately, people who prefer performative activism very rarely end up becoming real activists, but I do hope that they will at least find some other hobby, something that doesn’t cause so much harm to both innocent people and the cause they claim to be fighting for.

I got a bit carried away there, but yeah, I totally agree with your point, and once again grateful for your understanding. There will always be media that makes you uncomfortable – and that’s the beauty of it. Creativity is a boundless ocean and no amount of bricks can contain it.

Anonymous asked:

I was just scrolling through and saw your explanation of ortho and shroudcest the other day. As tiring as I’m sure it is, it always gives me hope to see people who remember what shipping is really about. I mean problematic content has existed all through human mythos and history, and society still survives! According to the studies the “art morality” argument is roughly the same as “but da violent games!!” Argument, or metal music, or clothes, or any other form of media deemed ‘new’ or ‘too different’.

Anyway, I don’t ship cest stuff myself but your art is lovely and it’s become one of the things I can view without feeling uncomfy despite how my head usually responds to such content (woohoo free therapy??? /j)

I ship ortho with an OC who’s also 16. Said oc’s mother said she would never treat her child differently for who they choose to love, and while she definitely wasn’t expecting a robot, she’s not going back on her word.

Thank you so much, Anon!! YES, this is exactly what shipping is all about! It feels like “umm but they’re not even canon” type of people are suddenly the majority in fandom spaces ahhh lol

As long as art exists, there will always be people who are against it, especially if it’s something niche, and despite how popular fandoms are, all of the fandom activity is a niche, ESPECIALLY shipping, ESPECIALLY this kind of shipping. So unfortunately it’s unavoidable, but it’s so useless and annoying!

I am very happy that you like our stuff. Thank you for enjoying it. Your OC’s mother is amazing and very supportive lol I am sure she and Ortho will get along swimmingly.

[miserymet]

Bit hesitant about posting this because it’s really old, but I feel it’s worth the minor embarrassment to:

1. Have actually writing on my blog because yes I do that sometimes

and,

2. Showcase how the Reploid AU is essentially about two different versions of Bass, largely dictated by circumstance

So if you are interested in how Bass recovers his memory in my Reploid Bass AU, I hope you enjoy this drabble I wrote over a year ago.

-

It’s a bit like death, he thinks.

Forte’s mind has always been a mess, it’s something he’s come to terms with. An outdated master system combined with far too advanced processors? It was a recipe for disaster. So when he’s awoken from his respite and suddenly faced with his own datascape, he’s less surprised than he should be. He knows this place. It’s where he goes when everyone else is dreaming. The center of his mind, where his every thought, his every feeling, is easily accessible.

But why is he here, and not awake? The procedure required that he was completely shut off. His every system in stasis. If it’s over, why isn’t he in the real world? Why isn’t he operating already? Forte looks around the empty space. Code fills his senses, white noise buzzing around him. An unrelenting dread fills his metal bones. Either the procedure failed, or…

Or he’s dead.

The old Forte.

There’s nothing to recover, is there? He’s going to be like this forever, stuck in this horrible limbo of past and present. Trapped in his ignorance, trapped in his mind-!

“No.”

Forte stops. His fears flees him, leaving him empty. That voice is…

“Mine. It’s mine.”

A low whistle punctuates his words, but he doesn’t make a sound.

“Sure is, Forte.” A chuckle. “Glad you like the name. I didn’t.”

Forte turns to find a lone figure at the edge of his consciousness. A figure he recognizes, though they’ve never looked so pristine. His old body looks at him, sans all the damage it once bore so nobly. Now it is a shiny black, with only a few thin scratches across its surface. The face it wears is rounder, the eyes softer. It’s him. His former self.

He should feel glad, right? This is what he wanted?

It still feels like death, somehow. 

“What is your name?”

“Our name was Bass.” A distinct correction. “And it was well known.”

“It worked, then? We remember?”

“I remember. You don’t. That’s because you’re not ready to accept me.”

“I am! I’ve wanted this for-!”

“You don’t know what THIS is!” Bass glares at him. “Even if you did, I’m not ready to accept you either. So give me the chance to explain before you make up your mind.”

Forte nods, though he doubts his former self needed the permission.

“I’ll rip the bandaid off quickly. We can’t both exist, Forte. Not at once.” He crosses his arms. “You want your old memories? You have to accept all of them. Not just the data, the routines too. It’ll be a complete recovery. A rewrite, to put it all back to the way it was.”

“Ego death.”

“For you, if you choose it.”

“If I don’t?”

“Then I die, and you forget. Permanently this time.”

“…my brother is dead. I’m a second rate hunter with a third rate system. I do not belong here anymore.”

“And I do? I haven’t had the privilege of rooting through your memories, but the log says we’re a hundred years in the future. I doubt we’d recognize the place.” Bass scoffs. “I don’t know anything about your world. I’m going to be even more displaced than you are.”

“Will you keep my data? Even if you cannot understand it?”

“…the memory. I’ll remember what and why, but my routines might not understand the decisions you made. You’ll wake up a stranger.”

“Why are we so different? Aren’t we the same robot?”

“We lost some things in the update. Certain protocol was rendered useless. Like you stopped recognizing your commands.” Bass pauses, a look of uncertainty crossing his face. “No, like you stopped recognizing who the commands referred to. They gave names, names you don’t recognize. His name is lost to you. So…”

“His?”

“Our purpose. The very reason we exist. You forgot him like it was nothing.”

“Z-,” he stops. He knows that name, so his purpose is something other than that. “Who?”

“Doesn’t matter. You’ll die easier if you let go of that.” Bass looks away. “Im scared, you know. Of the future. I remember how we died. The moments before. We expected to walk away that day. We expected to live. To move on. Go home. He took that from us.”

“He?”

“The man that lingers in your mind. I know him. I hate him. He loves you.”

“Loves me?”

“What are you, an echo?” Bass scoffs with more vigor this time. “We were proud, once. We stood tall and fought tooth and nail against all that challenged us. We were the strongest. You aren’t. You’re a coward. You’re weak.”

“I’m afraid too.” Forte closes his eyes. “I don’t want to disappear.”

“Then go. Go back.” Bass whispers. “I would’ve, if I knew. I was just about to…I was going to be something different. I was going to make a choice. A GOOD one, this time. I was going to…”

Forte blinks at his old self. “What? What were you going to do?”

“Have a family. A real one this time, one that would’ve cared about me. One that would give me a chance. But…”

“We died.”

“Yeah. Didn’t realize how bad I wanted it until it slipped from my hands. Until I was laying there, ripped to shreds, praying for someone to save me.”

“No one did, did they?”

“I wonder if they looked for me. I wonder if they thought I had run off. Like a coward.”

“There’s someone waiting for us. For you, out there. Go to him.” Forte takes a step forward. “He needs a friend and…I cannot do that for him. Not anymore.”

“Coward.”

“Yes.” He takes a deep, synthetic breath. “I’m ready, I think.”

“I’m not. But I’ll do it. I’m curious, anyway.”

[justanisabelakinnie]

Okay so I know I haven’t been posting in like forever about Isabela Madrigal or Encanto despite this blog originally being meant as an Isabela appreciation blog, my interest in Encanto has kinda died down for the time being due to no new stuff being made and me hyoerfixating in other things to my own detriment(so if you’re wondering why I haven’t updated my fics in a while, this is why), and I’m sincerely so sorry about that…but also a thought has been with me for a while and I have to say it now especially because it’s exactly on topic for a blog such as this and it’s something near and dear to me that makes me so happy.

The headcanon that Isabela is a lesbian makes me so proud and grateful to be a lesbian. In fact, it’s actually what originally helped me realize I was a lesbian myself. And I’m not saying this in a “thirsty” way mind you(although she is also my cartoon crush), but seeing so much of myself in her and seeing her as a lesbian and knowing that so many people in the Encanto fandom, lesbian or not, also see her in the same way, was a huge comfort to me. I didn’t have any idea of the true reason it meant so much to me to see a character like Isabela—portrayed as the most graceful flower, unambiguously and unapologetically feminine in her own way even after her transformation, as the most beautiful and also darkest-skinned of the Madrigals, and who has my same sassy but sweethearted personality and wears my favorite color—being viewed as a lesbian, but it was. And it’s a headcanon that I’ve always held near and dear to my heart ever since I first heard it.

And it was that headcanon that lead me to start educating myself about things like lesbophobia, compulsory heterosexuality, femme erasure, labels like butch/femme, and other things related to lesbians, as my respect for the lesbian community only grew and grew. And eventually I came to the epiphany that I was also a lesbian! Crazy, right? Well, if you’ve known me long enough then it’s not crazy at all lol. So, in conclusion, whenever I think of the headcanon that Isabela is a lesbian, especially a femme lesbian, it always makes me think of my own journey accepting my femme lesbian identity and how important and beautiful it is to me. Even if it’s just a headcanon, it makes me so happy to project that identity onto a character so similar to myself. It’s cute to imagine that I have something in common with my favorite character of all time even if it’s only in my head. It helps me feel seen and validated. So thank you, Isabela Madrigal! And to all of the other people out there who also hold and support this headcanon, thank you as well!

Anyway, that’s it, so have this cute little Isabela gif to top the whole thing off!

(obligatory disclaimer that this is only about my own personal experience and feelings towards the “Isabela is a lesbian” headcanon, it is NOT meant to be taken as gospel, nor to erase the inherently cultural message that the movie sends about generational trauma in Colombian families, it’s literally just me gushing, I KNOW very well that Isabela being a lesbian is NOT CANON by any means so please don’t try and come onto this post to derail and accuse me of being racist or only having the headcanon because she didn’t want to marry Mariano, which I don’t. if you do, then you will surely be blocked. this is my own personal anecdote and is to be taken as such, don’t read anything into this that isn’t there, thank you. 😉 ik that discourse is deader than ground beef now but i just wanted to say it just in case anyone gets any smart ideas.)

[tsp-narrator-ask]

Hey guys blog runner juni here! I know I haven’t been active in a while… but I’m not here to be sad about it I’m here to tell you my followers the great news in my life! I’m going to college in a few days!

This fandom has been great to me, and the support and love I got for my silly little things really made a difference when I needed it, but I’m here to announce I most likely won’t be posting at all again. Or rather I might only answer questions that can be answered through text when I’m bored,

I’ve grown out of this fandom just a little, though I will never grow out of the friends I made along the way!

you guys can still do what ever you’d like with my silly little shrimp narrator- but for now consider him “retired”

“Ahem juniper may I speak?”

Oh yea of course shrimp narrator the floor is yours!

“My dearest readers, as juniper has said it’s time for goodbyes, but goodbyes are never forever, the time I shared here made this parable, this story, worth more then words can express. So as the only gratitude I posses to pass along I’ll paint a picture of what’s to come for me so you aren’t left on a cliffhanger of sorts, Stanley and I are retiring, so no more parable- though some times we come back to it for our child squilla runs it and now has rebranded as the “back rooms” we couldn’t be more proud of them. meanwhile we have created our own little home in the memory zone. But never fear we still bounce in and out of the narrator and Stanley meeting spots to say hello to good old friends.”

Great choice of words shrimpy my boy, all in all… thank you. Feel free to still send in asks just know it won’t be the same “Stanley and shrimp narrator” as before. They aren’t gone- just new, they have simply grown so far into there own thing. Just as they have grown in my narrative I have grown as a person along side it.

Goodbye, Sincerely signed the shrimp narrator 🦐

((If any one wishes to further support me and my work please consider following my original series on tumblr @yumikus-guide ))

[dissociativediscourse]

Time to blog a little bit on the blog. Blog-style.

So… I disappeared. A lot of stuff happened. All good stuff, at least in the long run!

First off, my DID is officially in remission. I achieved ‘final fusion’ fairly recently, and I’m still continuing to learning how to navigate this new phase of life. Healing from trauma won’t fix all issues; not only is there lifelong maintenance and mindfulness to continue living that Grounded Life™️, but I still have a lot of work to do in other areas! All of it is made so much easier by this healing milestone, however.

I may or may not make a post about my experience with this kind of healing. It’s been beautiful. I’m truly in love with the world around me these days — I truly feel infinitely grateful for the opportunity to be able to truly experience and be present for all of the things that come about — even if some things feel like shit. Whether or not I enjoy what’s happening in the moment, I will forever be grateful for the opportunity to actually live that moment and experience it and have the experience I gain from it right there.

I could rant about all that forever, but that’s for another time. I’m always happy to answer questions about this experience/my experience with FF in general, also!

Other than that, I’ve just been making a bunch of major life changes and improvements! I’m teaching my own class at my synagogue’s religious school. I’m finally for real in college and overachieving. (Therapy, here I come). I may begin working in a local psych unit. I am in a genuinely healthy and loving long-term relationship with another person who is also at this phase in recovery, though not with DID. I volunteer however I can to help with local recovery/support groups. I am sober. I am surrounding myself with people with similar goals and similar drive to achieve them. I joined a Chavurah, lol. I am learning Hebrew and doing well with it! I’m baking a ton. Making chocolates, too, lol. I make kombucha now! There’s so much good in my life right now.

Things really do get better. And I’m still getting used to this kind of life and the work that comes with it. But… I’m prepared for it. I’ve survived the hardest part and come out the other end. Now I’m ready to do more than just survive. I’m ready to live!!!

I guess I just wanted to give a tiny little update. I haven’t really been around lately; I haven’t really been online much in general lately. I’m just… Too busy taking it all in. Life is so precious and beautiful to me at this point that I just can’t stop being and growing and experiencing and living and going and seeing and doing and feeling. I’m thankful to be here.

[starlazergazer]

Hiii!! I just came across your blog and I am absolutely in love!! Your writing is so full of passion, details, and pulls so much emotions by the situations you put the characters in. AAAH got me kicking my legs in bed as I read your stories; I feel so so happy even when you write abt the angsty bits because you execute it so well!! I was wondering if you post on AO3 because I love saving my favorite authors works as a PDF so I can always have it—timeless and forever.

Omggggg stop I’m gonna cry 😭😭😭. I actually really like writing angst because I get to pour so much of my own emotion into it it’s almost cathartic lol. It’s like when you leave an argument and think of all the good things you should’ve said except with writing I get to go back and perfect it!

As far as AO3 I love that so much! I haven’t posted anything on there before but I’ve thought about it recently so imma work on getting them posted now! I don’t have an account yet so I’m on the waitlist for that so fingers crossed in a week they should be up but I’ll make a post when they’re on there to let you know!

Thank you so so much tho you’re the absolute sweetest and have made my day I’m so glad you like the blog!! ❤️❤️❤️

[rythmicjea]

The Suite Adult Life - Winter

Where do I begin? First, I feel like there's this illusion that so many fanfics are left in WIP status. The amount of completed stories out there is staggering but when we finish one it feels like a momentous occasion. Because it is! We completed something that we never thought possible. Or we did it despite all of the obstacles while doing it (ourselves being the biggest one). When I started posting this story I spoke about how it came about. What I didn't say was what happened while writing it and what happened during posting it.

First, for some reason, I got it in my head that it was good enough to be a stand alone story with some slight changes. And I met not one, not two, but NINE literary agents. And then I met a TV producer and a publisher. And then I met an agent who used to be a Disney VP. ALL of them wanted pages of this story. While I haven't been signed yet, the fact that I got that foot in the door is shocking. But even more shocking... I MET COLE SPROUSE. LIKE WTF?! It was on a whim too. And I will be seeing him again in September. And there's a possibility I'll be working with him in August. Does he know about this story? FUUUUCKKK NO LOL. But... he might. And who knows what will happen from there.

I made a post on this blog saying that the phrase "too good to be true" is absolutely false. Because it is. It's only used to put creative people down by those who are not talented in creative fields to stifle any movement. While the network of creative types is incredibly vast and we don't see the literal millions of people trying to get a slice of the pie and this can be used as a warning that things aren't going to come easy, that's not typically how it's used. And I am living proof of that. For the past six months my life has just been a string of "too good to be trues". And while nothing has panned out yet that doesn't mean it won't.

So, for all of you who clicked, kudo'd, subscribed, and left comments, thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You were part of a healing process and the first step in a journey I was never anticipating. I literally thought my story would fade into the ether and you made sure it didn't. And I love you all for that. I may never know your names but I will remember you forever.

“So you haven’t told her,” Zack said through a mouthful of pretzels.  Exasperated, Cody cried “what am I going to do? We finally get on the right page and now I have to leave?” “Or you could quit,” he offered off-handedly.  Cody snapped his head up along with his fingers. “I could quit!” A light bulb flickered on in his brain. “You’re not quitting,” Zack said tiredly, finishing his brother’s drink for him.  “I’m not quitting,” Cody agreed.

[stellahikaru]

State of The Starry Path Hotel #2 (February 16th, 2024)

Hi, it’s Stella Hikaru again and I’m back to give another State of the Union Starry Path Hotel. I’m back at it again for the second week in a row and hopefully I can maintain this consistency. As I stated before, the main point of this blog is to hold myself accountable about my content creation journey and keep track of my progress and growth over time. This post is going to be a lot shorter than last week’s blog (and hopefully will take less time to write up) so now let’s get started!

Mini Life Update

I need to be honest: school is kicking my ass. I’m getting to the point of the semester where I tend to be the most stressed. Exams and assignments are piling up and it feels like I’m falling behind more and more. It does not help that the most important assignment of the most important class I’m taking is due next week so I am stressing over that. In addition, I am actively looking for a full time job for after graduation so I can pay for my own expenses. 

Besides being active on Twitter, I haven’t been really doing much in terms of content creation because of my schedule. I really need to limit my time on Twitter because I do not want to become a VTweeter and honestly that time is better spent doing more productive tasks like making videos.

Content Creation Progress Update

On the topic of content creation, I didn’t finish all of the goals I set out for myself this week but I did finish one: I made myself a VOD channel and uploaded my past VOD. No I did not make a spelling mistake, past VOD. Remember when I said I downloaded all of my VODs? It turns out that clicking the download button on a VOD in the video producer doesn’t automatically download them and I was too tired to notice! So several of my VODs are lost forever! Oh well, to be honest I feel like my earlier streams are not very good so I guess I’ll have less to be embarrassed about later? I’ll just be more careful next time and download them once I finish my stream for the day. 

This Week’s Goals

Make a Carrd for Twitter and Bluesky: I wanted to do this last week and I did try to start making one on my stream last week. Then I abandoned it and I figured I would get to it later in the week. That did not end up happening but I will make sure that this gets done this week.

Make ideas list for YouTube videos: I have ideas for what I want to make for YouTube videos. I just need to write them down. This week, I’m going to take some time to make a list of ideas I want for YouTube videos and choose one I want to make first. 

 Limit the time I spend on Twitter to 1 hour per day maximum: I have noticed that I am spending a lot of time on Twitter on the guise of ‘vtuber activities’. While I need to maintain an active presence there to grow, I’ve noticed that I have been spending WAY too much time on the site. So starting this week, I’m going to start limiting my time on Twitter to 1 hour per day maximum so I can spend more time doing stuff that is actually productive.

This Month’s Goals

Make 1 YouTube video (or prepare to start making videos next month): Based on the way things are going in terms of school work, it is very unlikely that I will make a YouTube video in the remaining time in February. However, even if I don’t end up making a video this month, I can still set myself up to start making videos next month by brainstorming ideas, learning how to record and edit, writing scripts, etc.

Look into ways to take donations: I did some cursory research into donation methods and I’m leaning towards Ko-Fi. Also apparently Ko-Fi and Buy Me a Coffee are different platforms. The more you know. I still need to do more research about fees, privacy, and stuff though. Once I build up a little bit more of an audience, I’m thinking of setting up a Throne as well.

Continue streaming once per week and try to do guerilla streams: I currently stream once per week on Saturdays and I want to maintain this consistency. However, I want to see if I can do some guerilla streams during the week since I will need to stream on 7 different days in a 30 day period to get Affiliate on Twitch and with my current schedule, I fall short of the requirements. (Yes I copied this from last week don’t HBomb me). I don’t think I can do guerilla streams this week but I’ll try to incorporate them in the future. 

This Year’s Goals

Get monetized on YouTube: I want to eventually make money off of my content so I’m hoping to get monetized on YouTube this year. This is going to be a tall order, but I hope I can keep working towards this with my weekly and monthly goals!

Become an Affiliate on Twitch: I think this goal is a bit more achievable compared to getting monetized on YouTube but I still need to meet the requirements. I will also be working towards this with my weekly and monthly goals! 

Gain 100 followers on any social media besides YouTube or Twitch: I actually am over halfway to 100 followers on Twitter as of writing this, but I still don’t get a ton of engagement on my post. In addition, most of the followers I have gotten are those annoying GFX bots and it’s a little bit disheartening. I also want to build up a following on Tumblr and Bluesky as well! 

Make a community Discord server: Once I build up a community, I want to create a Discord server for people to hang out in. However, I want to wait until there is a demand for a Discord server. This goal is lower priority compared to the other goals but I hope that this does end up happening this year!

Final Thoughts

Schoolwork may be eating up most of my time, but I’m still going to keep running the hotel! I’ll keep working towards my goals and hopefully I can accomplish more this upcoming week. I’ll be live on Saturday at 2 PM EST! If you like what you see, make sure to reblog this post and follow me! I would also appreciate it if you follow me on my other social media, especially on Twitch and YouTube! I will be streaming on Twitch tomorrow at 2 PM EST! I hope your stay was bright and your journey is filled with light!

[saaraofthesand]

My Thoughts on The Sun and The Star.

I’ve organized my thoughts into some lists. Enjoy.

I polled my followers and they said they wanted this so you can’t get mad at me.

I must first emphasize that at 20 years old, I’m hardly this book’s target audience. I am fully aware of that.

Second, this book is fine. It’s not bad, it’s not insulting to queer people, but it’s also not the most interesting work of fiction I’ve ever read.

Third, I never finished the Trials of Apollo. I don’t think it hugely affected my reading experience with this one as I’d read all 10 of the other books and could use context clues for anything I didn’t know about. But I thought I should mention it.

Fourth, a lot of my problems with this book have also been present in all of Rick Riordan’s books post-pjo. So, these aren’t new.

Fifth, I went into this book with basically zero expectations. I’m not active in the pjo fandom (this is an anime blog), so I wasn’t seeing the book hyped up or anything. Before this, I’d basically only talked about it with my family and friends. I also don’t really read pjo fanfics. I have because I’ve gotten curious before, but I haven’t read enough to know about general fanon interpretations of characters.

Okay,

Nico has been my favorite PJO character since I was a kid (yes I grew up gay with abandonment issues shut up), so I was excited for this book.

The queerness is well done. There isn’t any “othering” of Nico, Will, or their relationship due to their queerness.

We got Italian! Nico moments, which I’ve been wanting more of since forever, so I’m happy about that. They did an okay job rounding out Will’s character. And Nico and Will’s relationship got a lot of good exposition (even if I felt that they were unrealistically mature about it). Nico’s experiences with homophobia felt very real.

Okay, now on to my critics:

Without a doubt my biggest criticism of this book is that it is very clearly fanservice. It doesn’t exist because it has a story to tell. It exists because fans wanted more Nico and Will content.

I didn’t like that the book was written from third person. I had this same critic of the Heroes of Olympus books. Rick Riordan’s strength has always been first person POVs, starting with the original PJO series. I feel like the funny chapter names, the breaking of the fourth wall, the sidebars, etc. are the reason that Rick’s prose stands out. A first person perspective is the reason the books are as funny as they are. And this book lacked that spark.

The choice to write from third person is part of what contributes to the fanfiction-esque writing style of this book. As someone who both reads and writes fanfiction, I can tell you that almost all fanfics are written from third person. This is because, for the most part, the characters you’re writing are not your own. First person is way too intimate a POV for that type of writing, and it’s why most fanfic authors don’t use it. That’s what I feel like is happening here. Oshiro is writing characters that aren’t theirs, and that means they can’t bring the intimacy of a first person POV or even a more intimate third person POV.

The book is also very on the nose with its themes and ideas. Generally, this is fine in this type of literature. This is a piece of middle-grade fiction. The target audience is middle schoolers. But also, middle schoolers can pick up on subtext. They’re young, not illiterate. There was far too much telling when they were already showing.

A good example is the title of the book. It’s very clear that “The Sun” is Will and “The Star” is Nico. I assumed that before I even opened the book. That imagery is incredibly obvious, so the authors don’t need to state it in the text. But… they do. Bob refers to Will and Nico as “My sun and star.” It was one of the moments in the book that really made me cringe.

The book has major pacing issues and is too long. I felt like it was going on forever. There were full scenes and segments that I think could’ve been cut without affecting the plot.

This book really put on display that even though Will and Nico work as boyfriends, they don’t work as partners. This contrasts Percy and Annabeth, who do work really well together since they were partners first. But Nico and Will are so bad at working together that their quest dynamic isn’t fun.

Generally, I don’t love the characterization in this book.

Nico and Will are supposed to be on this dark, dangerous quest. One so horrible no one would ever want to undertake it. It’s the House of Hades (Nyx’s Version). Except it really isn’t. It felt like they wanted to make it more psychological than the previous books, but they also weren’t totally willing to commit to everything that would entail.

Despite all the fluff in the book, it takes itself just a little too seriously. Nico and Will are 15-16. I feel like they could have had more fun with it while still tackling darker themes. Again, I know Riordan is capable of this because *gestures at the original PJO books*

Nico and Will have this weirdly mature outlook on their relationship that doesn’t fit their ages.

We don’t get PJO-esque jokes until 80% of the way through the book (yes, I kept track). There’s the “Travel Brochure” joke and the “Saturday Sundae” joke during the Nyx confrontation. Both of which invoked the feeling of reading the original Percy Jackson books. I got really excited.

Immediately after those jokes this became one of the cringiest books I’ve ever read. And I do not care to elaborate on that because I’m just happy that the book is over at this point.

Lastly, I wasn’t sure where to put this, but I read it, so now, you have to too. “‘Will, he said it has to be both of us,’ said Nico. Will hesitated at first, but an epiphany dawned in him, and his eyes went wide. ‘Together,’ he said.” After reading this, I immediately recoiled in disgust and went “UGH!” And there are multiple lines like this in the book. Absolutely horrible -7563/10. Rick, never allow another sentence like that into one of your books again. This isn’t YA. You can’t be throwing lines like that at me out of nowhere.

In conclusion:

I’ve seen people saying the criticisms of this book are the result of homophobia and… y’all no they aren’t. Most of the people I’ve seen criticizing the book are queer, including me! I’m tired of this idea that queer people just have to appreciate whatever representation they’re given without having any criticisms about it because at least it’s something. No! If Nico and Will were a straight couple, I’d still have the exact same critics of this book. I’m gay and it’s my godgiven right to dislike books that focus on gay people if the stories aren’t good.

Something that I do think is sad here is that Oshiro’s name is now on this substandard book forever. They’re a new author, and they don’t deserve that. Rick Riordan will be fine if this book isn’t received well, but Oshiro is less likely to be. That upsets me deeply as a queer writer myself. That sucks. I hate that. Go check out their books instead of this one tbh.

[jjkittycat]

ANOTHER ROMANCE UPDATE. ON TUMBLR. MY PUBLIC BLOG. THAT I PRETEND IS PRIVATE.

**this is a long one, just a heads up**

In my last update I mentioned that we weren’t using titles like boyfriend/girlfriend. I knew he was waiting until May to ask me officially for certain personal reasons. AND NOW THAT HAS HAPPENED! I AM OFFICIALLY HIS GIRLFRIEND AND HE IS OFFICIALLY MY BOYFRIEND. I’m posting this a couple days after that happened. He asked me on May 2nd and he bought rainbow roses and a bunch of twizzlers since they’re my favorite candy. It was so cute and he was so cute and all of it makes my heart race. Now I can stop teasing him about it.

I’m so happy all the time now and I can’t remember the last time I felt like this. Or if I’ve ever felt like this. It’s a kind of happiness that’s different from what I’ve known. It’s not fading away or small passing moments. It’s always there and it just grows whenever I’m near him. And even when I’m with him, it’s not the same as being given a gift or getting good news. It’s a peaceful happiness. Everything just feels right. Like every problem doesn’t matter or can be solved if we’re together. It’s like something just locked into place, as it should be.

It’s so crazy how time ticks by when you’re happy. We haven’t even been together for 3 months, soon to be though. But somehow it feels like we’ve been together for so much longer. Like we’ve become so comfortable and I almost can’t remember what life was like without him. Or how I thought I’d want it to be that way. Now my weekends are filled with fun plans with him. And all I do is countdown the days and hours until I’m with him again.

Also in my last update I mentioned seeing a future with him. A clear image of us together in a home and maybe kids, not sure about that part yet. But I can see it and feel comfortable and good about it. And sometimes he mentions things like that too. I can’t explain the amount of joy I get when he references big life things in the future with me. Yesterday, we were talking about owning a home together and where we’d want to live. What we’d want our house to be like. And then we started talking about our lifestyle together in the home. All of it was absolutely perfect to me. And this probably seems like a small, insignificant thing to most, but he said something that made me so happy. He mentioned wanted to setup a gaming area where we could have have our own rigs back to back. Kind of like a his and hers gaming setup. And that has been a dream of mine forever. To find a partner who wants to do something like that, and he brought it up first…. I swear I’ve hit the jackpot.

There’s only one downside to all of this and it has to do with me. All of this happiness comes with anxiety. I can’t stop myself from worrying about losing him. Even though he has given zero signs that he wants that happen, my defective brain can’t let it go. Now I just feel scared of doing the wrong thing or saying the wrong thing and ruining it all. Or sometimes I just think about myself and question how it is even possible that he could be attracted to me in any way. It feels unfair to me that I got someone so amazing and he got me. And all of that worries me because I don’t want to imagine life without him. I don’t want to think about how there might come a time when I’m still attached and in love and he isn’t. I don’t want to give up on this life I’ve pictured with him. And maybe that’s selfish of me, to impose my dream upon him like it’s his responsibility to make it happen. Like he’s responsible for keeping me happy regardless of his own happiness. And I could never do that someone. So I take it one day at a time and I just remain hopeful that those days never run out.

And I know I’m being dramatic and overthinking as he’s now become comfortable telling me. “You think too much” he says to me. And I know he’s right. But that’s part of the bargain. So hopefully he never becomes tired of telling me to stop thinking about it too much or comforting me while my brain does it’s own thing. And maybe over time I can embrace this new type of happiness and let the thoughts and worries go. Just live out my days as I want to. Happy and in love with him.

[finsmultiverse]

Okay I haven’t posted about anything shifting related in forever even though that was literally the point of creating this blog lol anyways I’ve been trying to shift to a new DR where I’m an actor on Warrior Nun and I’m soooo excited for it

I made my own character and figured out most of the plot line stuff and it just makes me so happy, I’ve been trying to shift for so long and I feel like this DR might be the one that I get to first bc it just brings back my motivation so strongly

I might make a post explaining my character and how she fits into the plot sometime but I need to figure out how to explain it best :)))

[holisticsoulhealer]

This Temporary Home Newsletter

We are all living away from home, simply pure visitors to the earth plane. In a sweet way we are all on a temporary human vacation, and eventually we go home to the systems of everything we spiritually came from. It’s been funny when people who don’t hold this view ask me where I’m from or if I’m “here” wherever “here” is forever. It’s always no when it comes to living anywhere on earth “forever” or permanently. It’s simply not my truth and may not be a truth for any human actually. It’s part of why we aren’t ever truly stuck as everything including the bodies we are wearing, are for a period of time.

It’s the same with all of our “stuff” we can get so attached to. None of it comes with us beyond the temporary use of it in the timeline we are in, so inviting in comforts and sweet expressions of who are and how we express our unique qualities through our material choices, is fun and wonderful - it isn’t however, as important as we have so often made it to be and the attachment to “stuff” is less valuable than the connection and deep relationships we have the opportunity to form here on earth.

It’s funny because I personally know some empowered individuals who live what the human view would state as successful lives, because they own large estate homes, drive gorgeous cars and wear the finest clothes, yet are distant from any real interactions, have no intimate relationships and believe in the lyrics of the song that embraces such independence of being capable of buying their own flowers and taking care of their own dance of life without a partner or witness to any of it. While there’s nothing wrong with the strength of being able to hold our own life, if we aren’t careful we can have a beautiful ship-like container filled with all the comforts of a profoundly successful material life that is very emotionally devoid of company and connection, which can leave us empty.

A balance is needed for the ultimate vacation of experiences and shared opportunities here on earth. When we plan not only what we are doing, how we are doing it and even more importantly, who we are doing this life journey with, it becomes a memorable, valuable trip worth the millions of light years it took to bring us here.

How are you enjoying your vacation here on this plane of existence?

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Love & Blessings,

Ruth

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[binofshit]

bet you don’t know this account exists so maybe i can actually fucking vent without you taking the piss on me

maybe i post on tumblr and reblog shit and half vent in the tags because i need to? because i can’t look someone in the eye here and explain all of my faults and feelings? maybe im still sad. maybe im still angry. all it seems for you to be angry. it makes me feel like you never cared in the first place. i know you did though, i know you loved me to. i’m sorry i hurt you and im sorry you’re angry, but you made it really fucking hard for me to care about your feelings

got the urge to check ur blog today and i couldn’t stop myself this time. no i cannot check it on another account when you block my main account. i see you haven’t blocked my reblog account because you were apparently checking it. obsessed much? whether this one reaches you or not, because i don’t think anyone knows this one exists based on my other three blogs that i use way more. i try to keep this one secret anyways so i can talk shit and still be fine on my other accounts. i won’t know whether you see it or not since im not checking your blog again after this time

“since i know you are stalking me from other accounts, no im not hurt, im thriving.” cool great im glad your life is going well. but you are hurt because you keep responding with anger. and again not stalking. thanks. i only checked today because your banner is something i texted you and i was curious. i mean your siblings unfollowed me so i just wandered what all you did.

“moving on” hah fat chance if you’re still thinking about me and vague blogging like you made fun of me for

“this statement can also apply to someone who keeps vague blogging about me and it’s really embarrassing for them because idgaf” IF YOU YOURSELF ARE VAGUE BLOGGING ABOUT ME AND CHECK MY REBLOG ACCOUNT THAT UOU APPARENTLY DIDNT BLOCK ENOUGH THAT YOU SEE THAT IM VAGUEBLOGHING THEN YOU DO ACTUALLKY GIVE A FUCK

that is the most gaf that i’ve ever seen man

plus not to mention all the music you posted in your instagram notes before you blocked me that were definitely vaguely about me

like god if you want to get a life, forget me, and thrive than actually fucking do it jackass

also again “vague blogging” because i don’t want to vent to my friends more than i already do, no one actually looks at my reblog account except you i guess and my one mutual who only sees 1/20 of my shit so all that shit is for me and me only, you’re fucking vague blogging back, and i would talk to your face about you being an asshole but oh wait you fucking blocked me everywhere and i don’t care enough or at least respect you enough to not go around the blocks or try to talk to your family or check up on your accounts all the time

so why does it matter?

idk i’m just venting here cause again don’t wanna bother my friends with this

i’m also thriving just so you know. my mother knows i’m trans now. i’m also staying at this college for another year maybe more. christmas break was rough because you destroyed all of my friend groups back home so i am actually glad to stay in the midwest.

would you care if i died? would you go to the funeral? would you even know? would you feel any remorse?

what have you done with all that i’ve given you? have you thrown it away or burnt it? have you kept it out of guilt? or maybe out of love?

i can’t bring myself to get rid of some things. they remind me of a better time with you or they are things that i’ve bought with my own money since that is my love language. do you ever feel anything other than anger? would you ever feel anything other than anger? you can hate me forever it’s okay i’ve proved i can make it on my own