#I feel it always comes back to the fact that everyone thinks Gai is ugly and a joke

[sinnbaddie]

I don’t understand why Kishimoto never added Kakashi having thoughts about Gai when he died in the pain assault. It’s like he doesn’t want his relationship with Gai to have depth but then adds all these interactions and feelings that show how much he means to Kakashi.

He thinks of his dead friends and family, he thinks of Konoha 11, but he doesn’t think about his longest and biggest support? Not even a passing thought?

Might Gai is Kakashi’s best friend and rival, he isn’t a nuisance to him and he doesn’t think he’s less than him. Their relationship has substance and evidence to show how much they care about one another, im sick of Kishimoto and his constant need to diminish it then prop it up and then diminish it again. How can he be so inconsistent with relationships and character writing??

[littlemisssatanist]

on the topic of me being team green

a bit of a different post for me, considering what my blog is, but i was honestly so offended at being called a misogynist i made a fresh google docs page and typed out 1634 words of me ranting.

is there a real reason to post this? probably not, but i felt the need to establish myself as team green, considering all the posts i've been liking and commenting on lately. (if you are team green, and you see this, feel free to be my friend. in fact, i am begging you to be my friend. i have no tg friends and i need to see the light).

beware, typos and repitition are probably aplenty.

Whenever I see people talk about being TG, I always will see TB stans in the comments saying something along the lines of “Oh, you must be a misogynist, then.” And you know, it never happened to me until a few days ago when I commented on a TikTok post about Rhaenyra beefing with two-year-old Aegon. Someone replied to me, saying that I only brought it up because I’m a misogynist.

And. You know, I’ve been insulted before. I’ve been called ugly, stupid, immature, whatever whatever. But I honestly can’t think of a worse thing for someone to say to me, that I’m a misogynist. I know this isn’t that commentator’s fault, because they obviously don't know me. But the irony of calling me a misogynist when I am the most misandristic person to exist on this earth. I pray for the downfall of men daily. I make fun of them. Whenever I see an AITA post on TikTok, I am immediately on the woman’s side, regardless of what she may have done. 

It’s because I distrust men to a certain degree. You know what’s different for ASoIaF, though? It’s not real. It’s all fiction. TB stans will come on the internet daily and complain about TG existing, calling us misogynists, elevating the conflict between us to that of a literal genocide. Are y'all delusional? Are you guys stuck so far up Rhaenyra’s ass that you can’t tell reality from fiction? 

Y’all love to preach about how Rhaenyra is the number one feminist girlboss of Westeros, without realizing exactly how exactly you’re falling into the trap. You uphold a woman because she’s the heir, meanwhile she steals Rhaena’s and Baela’s inheritance in order to put her illegitimate sons on the throne (which, btw, is treason). But of course you guys wouldn’t care, because you like to think Rhaenyra is the exception to the rule.

That’s the thing. She’s only the exception because of her father, the king. After Viserys dies, she suddenly finds herself back in the same patriarchal world that y’all love to claim she’s trying to overthrow, that she’s trying to change. 

I don’t hate Rhaenyra because she’s a woman. I hate her because she’s a stupid woman. She knew exactly what it meant to be a woman in Westeros; she gets forced into an unwanted marriage (and even in that she gets far more freedom and will to choose than other women), she is undermined for being a woman, and others view her as unfit to rule. I would sympathize with her if she did absolutely anything to change that whatsoever. 

Y’all love to say that she’s so iconic with her dragon scenes, but what did that really accomplish aside from showcasing she is unfit to rule? She has three illegitimate sons who look absolutely nothing like her. Even if Viserys was on her side, everyone knows that they are bastards. Like, at least Cersei’s bastards looked like her. Rhaenyra was a white woman with white hair married to a black man with white hair, and her first three children are white boys with brown hair. Girl, if you were going to have bastards, at least do it with someone that bears at least some resemblance to your husband, or yourself. She purposefully made it harder for herself.

And for those of you guys who will bring up something about Laenor being gay. I genuinely don’t know how to tell you this, but if they truly cared about keeping up appearances, they would have had children. I say this as a queer person myself: If I were in Laenor’s shoes, I would have children with my coverup. Afterall, that’s what a coverup is for. And also: I could find nothing about Laenor being infertile. 

And for those who will also bring up Laenor accepting the Strong boys as his own, I literally couldn't care less. Everyone and their grandmother could see that those boys were bastards. Laenor accepting them and Viserys being delusional doesn’t change the fact that they were illegitimate, and everybody knew it. Secondly: Rhaenyra would need to admit the boys were bastards in the first place for anybody to claim them, something she did not do. In fact, she went so far the opposite way, I wouldn’t be surprised if she managed to delude herself that they were legitimate. 

And this I don’t understand. How do you shoot yourself in the foot, not once, not twice, but three times, with three obvious bastards, knowing that people would oppose you, people already oppose you, and still think yourself fit to rule? Every decision Rhaenyra makes is so stupid, it’s almost mind blowing to me. To live in Dragonstone for years while your father, the king, is sick (in which case, btw, the heir is supposed to step in to rule). Instead, we see Alicent ruling the kingdoms from behind the shadow, because Rhaenyra does nothing but live out a couple of years of bliss and comes back to King's Landing expecting everything to be handed to her. She does absolutely no politicking, absolutely nothing in order to sway the lords to her side. Should she be so surprised, then, that she is met with such resistance? 

Y’all TB stands love to call TG misogynistic because we don’t worship your perfect little dragon lady, as if her uncle-husband isn’t Lord of Fleabottom and grooms and rapes her from a young age. As if Daemon hasn’t called women whores and bitches, and his first wife, Rhea Royce, ‘Bronze Bitch.’ Like, is that not disgusting to you? Y’all love to preach about how Daemon loved Rhaenyra, as if he didn’t choke her the moment she disagreed with his methods. As if his first instinct everytime is anger and death and war.

(In case y’all couldn’t tell, I am extremely anti-war. I am under the impression that if you can’t solve things by talking it out, then you are definitely not mature enough to be ruling a kingdom, and Daemon is one of the most immature rapist misogynists I’ve ever had the displeasure of seeing).

(As an aside, I am not blaming Rhaenyra for her relationship with Daemon. Yes, I do find that most of her actions are stupid, but I cannot deny the fact that she was groomed and raped by him-- yes, raped, because she was a child, and children cannot consent. That is in no way her fault, and Daemon is the one responsible for this).

Y’all praise Rhaenyra for her maternal instincts while simultaneously hating Alicent for hers. Of course, an eye for an eye is unreasonable and far too much, but a son for a son is totally reasonable and to be expected. Rhaenyra protecting her children is being a good mother, but Alicent (rightfully) assuming that her children would be persecuted if Rhaenyra ascended the throne is her being a jealous bitch. Y’all blow her “sweet sister” line so much out of proportion, saying that she wouldn’t have killed her siblings if they just came over to her side. As if Alicent’s children, Alicent’s family, would choose Rhaenyra over her. Because “Helaena was the only good green” and “if only she just joined Rhaenyra”. Why would she ever do that? Because Aegon was a bad husband? The show literally stated that he only ever laid with her when he was drunk, because he couldn't do it otherwise. Obviously neither of them sought any pleasure from it, but they are still family. Helaena only had Aemond, Aegon, Daeron, and Alicent. Why would Rhaenyra ever be worth what her family is worth to her?

On a similar note, TB stans will constantly say how “oh, I feel sorry for younger Alicent, but not older Alicent.” As if Alicent wasn’t a 14 year old girl groomed and abused, as if she wasn’t twice pregnant by 17. As if Alicent wasn’t a victim doing her best in a world specifically designed against her.

That’s the difference between her and Rhaenyra. Both were victims to a much older man, but Rhaenyra considered herself an exception. Alicent had no choice but to be the bad guy, and despite how much y’all love to ignore it, Rhaenyra should have done the same. “Oh but Alicent was jealous of Rhaenyra!” Like you wouldn’t also be jealous of Rhaenyra? Rhaenyra, the perfect little princess, loved by her rapist daddy the king, who had everything handed to her on a silver platter. Would you not also be infuriated by her attitude, the entitled way she views the world? I’m sorry, but if your “strong female character” needs every other female character to agree with her, then she’s not that strong. Or a girlboss.

In conclusion, Rhaenyra sucks and is a terrible role model. True feminists love Alicent Hightower. Also, negative comments will be deleted, bc yk what is so fun about the internet? You can block people. I know, crazy concept. If you don’t want to see me or other TG on your for you page, consider blocking them. That tends to get rid of the thing you don’t want to see. I will also be doing this to anyone who thinks they’re smart enough to argue this topic with me. I do not care, hope your day goes terribly. <3

Btw, please never call me a misogynist again. In fact, you can call me Little Miss Misandrist, because there is no universe out there where I side with a man over Alicent Hightower. Or any woman at all, for that matter. 

(Except for maybe if the pickings were between Rhaenyra and Criston. If you’re one of the media illiterate TB stands who consider Criston to be an incel, you should also go ahead and block me, your stupidness is draining my brain cells).

Stay mad, xoxo.

[teyamloak]

It’s You

↳ conrad x y/n!

warnings: Conrad is 18 y/n is 16, cursing, smut, handjob, no sex.

✩ synopsis: y/n is back at cousins looking better than ever. She's prettier than she was last summer, the boys around her take note of that, especially Conrad.

✩ note: hi everyone, I hope y'all don't mind that I'm writing about something that isn't avatar. btw Anger part 3 is in the works it will be out soon!!

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

it was a drive going down to cousins. I've missed it, I've missed annoying my brother, Steven with my "beautiful" singing voice. I've missed just sitting in our car and listening to music but the thing I've missed the most about cousins was a boy. Conrad fisher. Literally a goddess, a guy that would make you do a double take when he's walking by, a guy that can make you cum just by looking at them, Conrad Fisher. I've had a crush on him since I was a little girl. he was so perfect you would have to be gay to not have a crush on him, even then you still would.

☆═━┈┈━═☆

pulling into their driveway felt crazy, being there felt life-changing. Steven was the first one to get out of the car, and Jeremiah was the first to be outside.

Jeremiah was Conrad's younger brother, they were complete opposites sometimes you would wonder how they were even related, Conrad was dark, very dark while Jeremiah was bright and light-hearted. Jeremiah and I were best friends, he was so fun to be around and he wasn't nonchalant like Conrad was you could always know what Jeremiah was thinking or feeling but you couldn't with Conrad and I hated that.

I stayed in the car for a couple of seconds because I was scared and because I wanted to enjoy everything, eventually I put my feet on the ground and got out. Jeremiah and Steven were talking and my mom was already inside after giving Jeremiah the biggest hug a mom could give. Once I got out everything stopped, their conversation, their laughter, everything.

Jeremiah was checking me out, it was so obvious, everything he felt was always written on his face.

Slowly walking towards me he says "I missed you little one"

"I hate when you call me that you guys are literally one year older than me" I shouted because he was still a little far away from me

"I don't care you'll always be little to us, come here beautiful" saying this while pulling out his arms and waiting for me to give him a big ass hug.

he hugged me like we'd never hugged before, it was nice and sweet. After a couple of seconds, I stood there waiting for Conrad to come out and say hi to me. I've missed him, I needed to see him.

It is like I had summoned him he appeared like he was reading my mind. He was quick with the way he was walking he looks like he needed to be somewhere. he was busy with the hood part of his hoodie but then he stopped and looked at me. He smiled. He smiled at me. He smiled while looking at me. OMG.

He walks towards me and for I moment I felt at home I felt safe. He was still smiling when he was walking towards me.

“I liked you better with glasses,” he says joking around with me “Well I like myself without them” joking back. “you look the same you know that” “Is that a bad thing?” I said, i was hurt in a way, was he calling me ugly? “no, not at all I just think you look the same, yk good looking and stuff” The last part he said so fast that if I moved an inch I would miss it.

“you think i’m good looking and stuff?” I said excitedly, frantic to know his answer “ofc you’ve always been a good-looking kid, you would think your sister is good-looking no matter what wouldn’t you” This wasn’t a question this was a fact to him.

he had just friend-zoned me but also immediately after he had sister zoned me. He was saying that he found me “good-looking and stuff” because a big brother would always think their sister was good-looking.

☆═━┈┈━═☆

waking into the house for the first time since last summer felt so unreal. nothing had changed everything was the same, Susannah  was standing beautifully with my mom in the kitchen they had already started preparing something for all of us to eat.

while they were preparing something I went into my room to unpack. I’ve missed my room, I’ve missed my beautiful light blue walls. I’ve missed my bear. Conrad gave me him when we were at the boardwalk when we were younger his name is Junior Mint.

I grabbed him and hugged him I put my nose to his head, I’ve missed the way he smelt. I loved him so much not only because Conrad won him for me, I loved him because he reminded me of that day. yeah, that day was bad I mean Conrad was eye fucking the girl at the game and yeah it maybe made me cry but at least he won Junior Mint for me.

Jeremiah came bouncing into my room and saw me smelling Junior Mint. “you still have that old thing?” “Obviously I still have it if I’m holding him, dummy” Jeremiah and I were best friends we joked around with each other like this our whole lives. “I know dummy what I meant was WHYYY do you still have him, he’s mad old” he stated while mocking me. “because I love him plus he helps me sleep” “lmao you’re so cute y/n” I laughed with him I don’t think much when Jeremiah calls me cute because he isn’t Conrad.

“KIDS COME DOWNSTAIRS DINNER IS READY” the one yelling was my mother.

☆═━┈┈━═☆

owe were all sat at the dinner table, Jeremiah and Steven were on their phones and Conrad was sitting o looking down at his plate and waiting to eat. “can y’all get off your phone and eat your food” “mom there’s a party we are going to after this” Jeremiah says talking to Susannah. “who’s going?” she says like a man would. “all of us” he says quickly “Even y/n” She says this with the most questionable tone ever, yeah maybe I don’t go to parties but damn. “no obviously not y/n, she’s too young for that cmon mom” I was offended but I was even more embarrassed he’s was not only calling me a kid but calling me a kid in front of Conrad. But I stayed quiet like normal. “I’m not going either.” everyone stayed quiet he wasn’t going to a party?? “what the hell do you mean you aren’t going bro,” Steven said confused as hell. “I’m not really feeling like going to a party today” “Well then it’s just going to be just you and y/n because me and your mother are going to a book signing.” “cmon Conrad come with us you don’t want to be bored, alone with y/n, do you?” “I don’t mind it,” he said well going back to eating.

did I hear the right…. Conrad and I will be alone in the summer house, ALONE.

☆═━┈┈━═☆

Conrad is downstairs watching a movie and I can’t move, he invited me to watch the movie with him but I can’t move.

“y/n the movie is already starting where are you?” while saying this he’s opening my door and looking for me. I was in the bathroom with the door wide open looking at myself in the mirror.

I look different then I did last summer that was obviously but the one thing that I didn’t remember or that I tried not to remember was how my body had changed. My body was completely different i had bigger boobs and a nice tight ass.

I felt good about my new body but at this moment while I looked at myself in the mirror I felt ugly and it was even worse that conrad was looking at me.

“what are you doing tiny?” he had a confused looked in his face but said this jokingly

“um, getting ready for yk the movie and stuff” “Why did you change your clothes, it’s just a movie downstairs, we aren’t going out. Unless you want to go out” he kept rambling clearly uncomfortable but i couldn’t figure out why.

maybe it was the fact that we were alone for the first time or maybe it was the fact that he was in my room

I turned around ready to leave my room and go downstairs

“I wanted to look nice I was looking crazy when I got here plus I just took a shower” pulling my wet hair in front of my face so he can see it “seeee it’s wet” he slaps my hand because of how close my hand was to his face.

“I can tell you showered, you don’t smell bad anymore,” he said this with a stone-cold face that made me think he was telling the truth

we stayed silent for a couple of seconds and then he started laughing like he said the funniest thing in the world. “your face is so funny tiny you look so cute, just like a baby”

why did he always have to compare me to a baby why couldn’t he just stop once he said I was cute?

“let’s go tiny” he reaches for my hand and i grab onto it, this felt nice.

as we reach the bottom of the stairs he let go of my hand, the loss made me feel sad almost alone.

he reaches down and grabs the remote, pressing play.

“Since I know you like scary movies I decided we could watch one”

smiling I sit down next to him, not saying a word

he presses play and the movie starts.

an hour has gone by and we have a blanket covering us now, it normally doesn’t get cold at night but it did today. It was only 8 which meant we were going to be alone for another hour.

Conrad hasn’t said a word to me since the movie started and neither did I, I was afraid of saying something.

but I decided to stop being a little girl I was tired of him looking at me like I was a baby I was tired of him calling me “tiny” like I was a child.

so I did something that I never thought I would do, I removed the blanket that we were under and got on his lap, he was intently confused.

“what the fuck are you doing y/n,” he said coldly

but I ignored it instead I looked him in his eyes and started to move my hips back and forth like I was riding him. I’ve never done something like this but it felt so good.

I kept looking at him and he kept looking at me

I felt him get hard underneath me so I know he liked this I knew that he wanted me.

“get off yn,” he said but it came off as a whimper it was low and soft

I looked at him hurt but I never stopped what I was doing “Why” “You don’t understand what you’re doing rn y/n, you’re just a little girl”

that got me mad rightfully so

so I got off but I wasn’t done, I looked at him the minute I got off and saw that he regretted what he said it looked like he missed what I was doing to him, and from his hard dick I knew he wanted more, so I gave him more

my tiny hands started to unbuckle his belt he didn’t stop me he just watched me; studying me.

I took off his belt and put it to the side then I quickly started to undo his button and then pulled down his zipper he was wearing black polo underwear.

“y/n?” he said suddenly, he noticed that I had stopped at the site on his underwear. the boldness that I had before was gone and I regretted what I had done.

but Conrad didn’t want me to stop as much as he told himself that he did he knew that he didn’t want that.

without thinking Conrad brought down his pants and pulled out his thick white dick. It was the first dick i’ve ever seen, i’ve never watched porn and i definitely didn’t know what i was doing.

“come here, tiny” his voice now bolder and stronger

he was stroking his dick while talking and looking me in the eyes.

“don’t call me that” I said putting my head down now ashamed

“do you have a problem with me calling you tiny”

“yes I do I’m not a baby and I’m not tiny, it’s stupid and I don’t like it”

“well, then that’s all you had to say, now come here before I realize how this is a big mistake.”

normally that would hurt my feeling but this time and this moment it made me happy

i obeyed him like I always did. he grabbed my hand and placed it on his dick, his hand was on top of my hand and he started to grip my hand so it could grip tighter around his thick dick.

he started to move my hand up and down, he moaned loud and hard. I started to move my hand faster as his moans got louder I knew that I was doing this right because of his moans and the way he threw his head back.

“god, y/n im about to cum, be a good girl and open your mouth.”

and I did of course I did I was here for him, I was made for him.

I leaned forward towards his dick and I opened my mouth, he started to stroke himself fast asf

he didn’t take his eyes off me

“omg fuck, fuckkkkk”

then he came all over my mouth and face.

he didn’t even have to tell me to swallow it because i did the second it was in my mouth, it tasted so fucking good, it tasted almost like nothing.

he moaned so loud, he grabbed my face and pulled me close to kiss me, this was the first real kiss I ever had and I just followed his lead.

he was sweet and slow with the kiss like he wanted to prove that this meant a lot to him.

he pulled away and continued to look at me

“I want to fuck you but that won’t happen today, you’re too perfect to be fucked on the floor like you don’t mean anything to me because y/n you mean everything to me”

I was happy with that, I was so fucking happy that he respected me enough to know that, that was exactly what I wanted and need to hear.

“Are you okay with that, my love?” “yeah Conrad I’m actually very happy you said that.”

“let’s go clean your face before the others come I don’t want them to know what happened so can I trust you to keep this a secret?”

a secret, wow a secret.

“why would this be a secret? Don’t you like me?” “Of course I like you y/n it’s just I’m older than you and the others wouldn’t understand especially your brother, he would kill me for having his sister’s face full of cum, and he would murder me knowing how much I enjoyed it.”

“Okay, Conrad anything you want” I was mad but I understand where he was coming from he was 18 about to go to college and I was 16 about to start my junior year in high school. Our parents would freak knowing what had happened.

Conrad stood up and grabbed my hand, pulling me up, “Let’s get you cleaned up”

Hi y'all I hope you enjoyed this part i’m pretty sure i will be making a part 2 which will contain more smut and stuff, also i wrote this before season 2 of tsitp came out so it takes place then!!!!

[shrimpmandan]

It's always been so weird to me that people are all about ideas such as "language is made up, words evolve, everyone has a unique sexuality!" when it comes to lesbians and asexuals, but when it comes to bisexuality, the conversation suddenly becomes "actually this term has a rigid definition and if you identify with it, you're transphobic and behind the times"

And like, bi history is a massive interest for me, right? I'm not gonna claim to be a historian, but the amount of people who say shit about bisexuality that's just plain incorrect is insane.

Bisexuals have always shared spaces, terms, and community with lesbians and gays. Many bisexuals called themselves lesbian or gay prior to coming out, and many of them hold onto both labels-- thus bi lesbians and bi gays. Hell, I fucking identify as bisexual and gay simultaneously. I think I always have. The fact that I would only get significant flack for this if I was a bisexual woman identifying simultaneously as a lesbian is fucking insane. "Dyke" and "fag" and everything in-between has always been inclusive of bisexuals. Bisexual butches, femmes, twinks, bears, and everything in-between have always existed.

Bisexuality has MULTIPLE definitions. Not just historically, but person-to-person. I know bisexuals who are attracted to people regardless of gender or sex. I know bisexuals who only date cis men or cis women. I know bisexuals who have fucked women but only date men and vice-versa. I know bisexuals who have even more esoteric and specific orientations, such as only dating men and trans women, or only dating women and trans men. And regardless of how you feel about any of those, they are still bisexuals. Those are still forms of bisexuality. It is an orientation that is inherently varied, and has become increasingly so as the arbitrary, rigid lines between male and female have been weathered by the sands of change.

Hell, people LOVE that one post about a bi trans man identifying as both a butch lesbian and a gay man-- and I get it. I could never personally-- it'd make me VERY dysphoric-- but I never much cared for the dynamics of opposite sex relationships. It's something that's very awkward to navigate as a bi trans person. Subconsciously, I've always entered same-gender relationships. Back when I still identified as a bi woman, I dated and preferred women. Now, as a bi man, I largely date and prefer men. And yet, being aspec, I'm also indifferent to most people sexually. Simultaneously, everyone is hot and everyone is meh. Not repulsive, just meh. It's a weird reality to live. Effectively, I fuck or date people regardless of gender. If I'm feeling fancy, I define my bisexuality as being attracted to both types of sex characteristics regardless of their configuration-- explicitly inclusive of intersex and trans people.

And yet people still refuse the variance of the bi experience, whether it's bisexuality as neutrality, bisexuality as "every relationship I'm in is gay", bisexuality as in "I don't even really think about the gender/sex of who I'm attracted to", or anything in-between. Bisexuality is oversimplified as "attracted to two or more genders", or "attracted to both genders/sexes", as if those definitions fully encapsulate the bi experience when they don't. Plenty of bisexuals absolutely fit into those two definitions, but to act as if ALL of us do, to deny the rich history and variance of bisexuality, has been a deep-rooted and recurring problem that loves rearing its ugly head every damn year.

Happy Pride Month.

[wikaliyag]

hi, so i've become a tomgreg enthusiast just before the fourth season aired (i basically devoured the whole three seasons of succ in four days lmao). i don't really engage in social media and fandoms anymore but i would like to share my thoughts on the tomgreg relationship and the final season itself.

i would like to start with the fact that i was actually really surprised how explicit their relationship was in the first three seasons (in a way it still really is, but we'll get to that), since from what i knew about the show it was supposed to be something perfect for your 'normal' media consumer out there, just some business stuff, so with that logic i assumed it will be as heterosexual as it can get to not offend anyone (i mean homophobes). but the second tom and greg were together on the screen my brain materialised the 'i know what you are' dog meme and i loved it. it didn't feel superficial, it was something different, fresh and ugly and toxic and just real. seeing these two just be horrible to everyone (including each other) made sense and then seeing them finally lower their gourds down and care for only each other also made sense. so my main point is that it made a lot of sense for them to go with the dynamic and to just make it the way it is. i believe wholeheartedly that it is a genuine representation that i so desperately wanted, since i'm so done with all that 'gay ppl can't be horrible pieces of shit and have to be unnaturally perfect and good'. 

it isn’t as explicit as other queer relationships in media but that’s kinda what makes them so unique and fun to watch. they don’t have to kiss or to say ‘i love you’, cause we already have that confirmation through how they act towards each other. from ‘would you kiss me?’ first interaction to the ‘i will take care of you’ declaration, like he really didn’t have to do it, i believe he might have just been lonely in the roy kingdom and greg was the same, not in the inner circle but still a part of the family. that was the reason why he was so attracted to greg from the beginning. the nero and sporus speech, when tom decides to pour his whole heart into that speech and greg just responds with nothing, so tom awkwardly drops his smile, cause he thinks that he might be the only one that feels that way. (it was so fun to me cause for some reason i love to see tom suffer, idk why don’t ask me). but then greg immediately asks if tom is okay, cause he does care about tom and maybe he is just super oblivious to tom’s feelings at that point. in the fourth season greg allows tom to throw him under the bus during social interactions just for him to look better. he also is okay with tom treating him like shit throughout the whole show, even though he could have just leave him and try to suck up to his family more (as we can see in this season it is actually possible for greg to somehow have a working relationship with his cousins). i could give you so many more examples but we all get the point. it is not sexually explicit and it doesn’t have to, queer relationships are not only about sex or physical intimacy in general (though we still get all that patting on the back, stomach, shoulders ect., even all that whatever it was in the first ep from greg), it’s the emotional connection too. and we did get that. 

if it comes to the fourth season, i must admit that i agree with a lot of criticism. the characters feel really off to me. and i will focus on greg for a bit. this season he is suddenly gross and says stupid things, like he is a total imbecile that can’t think for himself (like i get it, he was always a little dumb dumb and ofc he can say gross things, it’s just that these are his only character trades right now, that’s the problem). he is definitely not qualified enough to be in a position that he is now but the greg from the second or third season would at least try to pinch some of his own ideas (even tho they are shitty) or maybe try to give his honest opinion on something, now he just goes ‘yeah it’s dope man’ and moves on. if it comes to tom i would say he is handled quite well, it might be because macfadyen is an absolute acting genius, but him being a total flop and trying so desperately to be on a good page with all the people that he betrayed makes sense. he is scared he is soon going to lose everything and it makes him do everything in his power to not let that happen, he is a total mess emotionally (and we love to see it). that includes coming back to shiv. even though he stood up for himself and i really wish he could just leave her and finally be happy alone, he has to be the a good and obedient husband once again, that’s his only way of saving himself. he says that he loves shiv for the money but i think there is also an actual unconditional love there, it’s just not a thing that she will understand, so he must speak in another language - a love for money and power. she then gets it and lets him in. but then you can see in a way that tom looks at her, that there is something more to it than the prestige of being married to a roy. 

and now the tomgreg relationship. we don’t see many scenes of them and yes it hurts a bit, since you wait a whole ass week for an episode and you don’t get much of their interactions but i saw someone saying that ‘they don’t need to show us tom and greg plotting together, cause we already know that. they focus on the dynamics of the relationships that are currently changing and tomgreg is as solid as a rock’ (obviously paraphrasing that one). i so agree with that, we don’t have to see them to know, it would be amazing to get more confirmation and just to see them both be all giggly middle aged men together but we already know where we stand. they have the deal, they work together behind the scenes, i bet that is exactly why in the sixth episode they went to an empty room, so that they can update each other on their secrety and confidential stuff. and why is greg gregging for ken and tom is suffocating himself in a toxic relationship with shiv? it’s simple, because it’s their plan to do so. they hope that at least one of the relationships will stick and save them from their doom. they will jump ships to whoever will be willing to not throw them away. this way it makes sense for us not to see them all that often together because we see them executing their plan, separately on camera but actually together. i hope that this will be addressed in the last four eps, it would be actually kinda fun to see maybe one of them or even both of them betray each other for their new friends/lovers to just be betrayed themselves and end up together anyway. it's what they deserve.

[detachedfacade]

Saint Valentine

summary: After bumping into each other on a particularly bad valentines day for Steve, he and Eddie find they keep missing each other, until Eddie finally learns to stay still.

You can also read it here on ao3.

For @conversationswithamillennial

Valentine’s Day 1997

Steve is going to get his ears pierced. He’s thinking about doing something drastic with his hair. In fact he’s even started itching for a tattoo. He is decidedly not having a post break-up breakdown thank you very much. He just wanted to do it. He always wanted to see how he’d look. The fact he just got out of a 6 year relationship was only somewhat part of it. In that Derek was never a fan of piercings or tattoos or alternative scenes. And god knows Steve has never been in a relationship that didn’t result in him changing parts of himself at the very least. Self loathing and becoming a ghost of his former self at its worst. But that wasn’t Derek. Derek was a good kind man - he never intended to be controlling it was just that Steve wasn’t self assured enough to be whatever version of himself was the real version. Robin blames Carl for that. The first boyfriend after Steve had figured himself out - the compulsory heterosexuality addressed and the big gay elephant in the room finally acknowledged. Carl must’ve seen it - the nervousness of a man only just coming into the world - the reality of insecurities and neurosis that comes with losing your family and recognising the monsters within.

He was far too easy to manipulate - far too easy to keep small and quiet. And Carl kept him small, because it suited him. He could flit in and out of Steve's life, make him feel special and important and loved and then strip it all away and leave Robin with the crumbling mess of tears and self hatred that Steve would become. Every time Carl came back Robin pleaded with Steve to see sense but he never could. Carl had a power over him. It was ugly.

But that had been over for years, and Robin had actually liked Derek, everyone could see they had a future together.

Until Valentine’s Day 1997, when Steve had proposed over breakfast and Derek had replied “I’m moving to Montreal. I’ve met someone.” The excessive business trips suddenly making sense.

So there Steve found himself, 6 hours later - afraid to go back to the apartment and find Derek packing or have to have some kind of conversation about custody of the cat or how they could still be friends - he went instead to a piercing shop. It was a small place in downtown San Fran that he had gone to a few times with Robin, to hold her hand while she pretended it didn’t hurt. Though his hand was almost broken by the time they would leave so he was pretty sure she was bluffing.

He arrived at the peircing shop knowing only that he wanted as many holes in his body as possible.

“Hey man can I get like 3 helix piercings and a conch and my left lobe and do you think you could do my eyebrow as well?” He stuttered out, the adrenaline that brought him there still pounding around his body.

“Are these your first piercings?” The guy replied, his face filled with ink and metal, his eyes filled with judgement and boredom.

“Yeah?” Steve replied, uncertain where his answer would lead him, concerned that his pent up energy was seeping through his feet and down out of the scratched up floorboards.

“Its probably best not to go all out first time in case your body doesn’t react well.” The guy said, leaning against the desk, inspecting Steve’s face, looking for something, Steve didn’t know what.

“Okay..” Steve sighed. “How about right helix and left lobe?”

“Yeah alright.” The guy nodded, slumping down in his chair and pulling a piece of paper out of his desk drawer. “Fill out this form.”

Hearing the voice of an old friend was always a strange thing to Steve, given that he had moved so far from his hometown. There was nothing in the world that made him want to stay in Hawkins, not after everything. So he and Robin fled to the opposite side of the country and didn’t look back. Neither had any kind of relationship with their parents - and their old friends had all moved on. The only time he had ever gone back there was for Dustin’s 21st birthday. It was the last time too, he had heard the voice of the old friend, who was currently calling his name, while he had a needle through his ear, trying to keep his eyes from watering.

“Steve Harrington ?!”

His eyes flitted open. Sure he hadn’t heard the man’s voice in person in years, but he heard his rough rasps crooning out from the radio a fair few times a day, after the success of his latest single. “Eddie?” He said. The piercer didn’t move, didn’t stop, just jammed another needle right through his cartlidge. An involuntary whine left his mouth. His face flushed red immediately, the feeling of the heat prickling against his skin making him all the more embarrassed. Eddie stayed leant against the doorframe. “I was wondering if you were still living in SF. Thought about giving you a call but…”

The piercer finished up and moved away, her eyes flitting quickly over to Eddie, she did a double take before hastily giving Steve the after care form and letting Steve go. “Yeah, never moved.” Steve said. “I’m basically still living with Robin too, I’m there enough.” He continued though he wasn’t entirely sure if Eddie even knew they had lived together in the first place.

The two boys walked out of the studio stopping just outside, awkwardly assessing whether they were both going to be walking the same way, instead they stayed where they were, leant against the graffiti'd brick wall, took out cigarettes to explain away the fact they were both eager to remain in each others presence for a moment longer than necessary. “So what brings you here?” Steve said.

“To the tattoo studio or to San Fran?”

“Well I guess both.”

“On tour - got a show here tonight. I’ve been wanting to get something done by this artist since forever - you know he tattooed James Hetfield - never really made it out to this side of the country though - every time he had a guest spot in NYC I would be out of town. Frustrating. Anyway finally I get here and figure its a weekday afternoon and I may as well check if they have walk in space.”

“Did they?”

Eddie pulls up his sleeve to show a fresh snake tattoo looping around his right forearm.

“Oh awesome.” Steve says doesn’t really know if they had intended to be having a full blown conversation. How long does one catch up with an old friend? - an old acquaintance really. The silence between them felt heavy, he shifted against the wall, his shoulder edging away from the wall, as if to begin to walk away, he stopped himself instead asked: “Did it hurt?”

Eddie shrugs cigarette between his lips. Then smiles at himself “Like a bitch. But don’t let that get out, I have a reputation to uphold.”

“Quite the reputation too. I can’t get through a day without hearing you on the radio.” Feels weird saying it aloud, makes him feel like a stalker. Decides he needs to restore balance, adds a bitchy comment: “I’ve considered buying ear plugs.”

Eddie nudged him with his elbow, taking the jab lightly, thankfully. “Ouch.” He said. “Well you aren’t my target demographic anyway.” Eddie added. “Though with those new peircing’s maybe you could be.”

“I think I could be uh..” Steve searches for the word. “Punk?”

“Oh no Harrington, major faux pas. Metal and punk is not the same. If we didn’t share trauma and scars I’d have to deck you over that.”

Steve blinked at the threat, knew it was a joke, wondered why Eddie was so comfortable with him. Relative strangers at this point. He laughs a jolt of laughter into the air, smoke jumping from his throat with it.

“You think you’re tough now Munson?”

“Hm not really. But the murder allegations leaked to the press last year. It only increased our following. Metal heads love that shit.”

“I’m sure they do.” Steve said, wondering when the appropriate time was to cut the conversation short. Wondering why he would even want to do that when there was only awkward conversations and heartbreak waiting for him at home.

“You should come to the show tonight. I’ll get you in backstage.”

“Really? You’d do that.”

“Sure we are friends right?”

“I haven’t seen you in 7 years.”

“No pressure.” Eddie said. “ I didn’t mean to be…I don’t know I lost touch with a lot of people. I didn’t intend to.”

Steve nods - doesn’t say it, but the sentiment is clear - the regret of never reaching out.

“If you are free…” Eddie said. “This is the address.” He wrote the name of the venue on Steves hand. “Go to the back door and ask for Angie - she’ll let you in.”

“Um. Yeh. I’ll - thanks I’ll think about it.”

“7pm. By the way.” Eddie calls back as he walks toward the road, signalling for a taxi.

“Uh huh.” Steve nods, treading his cigarette butt into the ground.

-

Brandy mewed and purred trotting over to the door as Robin let Steve in, jumping immediately onto his shoulder to rub against his head.

“She hates me.” Robin said, closing the door behind him, making their way to the kitchen where Robin was making tea. “How are you doing?” She asked, she knew of course about the break up, she was the first person Steve had called that morning. It hadn’t even occurred to her Derek would say no, she had answered by saying “Was he surprised?” To which he replied.

“I was actually more surprised. He’s been cheating on me.”

“Oh shit.”

“Don’t let him pick up Brandy, I will not let her become an EXPAT.”

“What?”

“I’ll explain later.”

“It’s later.” Robin continued.

“Yeah well.” He sat down at the breakfast bar, taking the herbal tea she had made him.

“Chamomile.” She said. “I figured you’d need it.”

“Huh. Thanks.” He replied. “ Yeah, he’s moving to Canada with this other guy, I guess. He said he was intending to call it off after the first time. Gave me all these details about how he justified it to himself. How he couldn’t help it. That he’s only human. Well fuck that. You know who else is human? Me. Fucking me. And I didn’t cheat not ever, even when he was away for a month, you remember, I didn’t look elsewhere I used my hand and a couple magazines like everyone else but god fucking damn him he was fucking someone else the whole time. And now I have to get tested. He assured me he used condoms with this guy but how can I trust him.”

“Jesus Christ what a piece of work.”

“Tell me about it.” Steve said. “ I don’t know. Maybe it’s a good thing. I mean I haven’t been properly single since I came out. Maybe it’s time for me to figure myself out.”

Robin nodded. “That explains the piercings. Bit late for the teenage rebellion, don’t you think?”

“Or a bit early for a mid-life crisis?” Steve said helping himself to a satsuma from Robin’s fruit bowl. Brandy perked up in his lap as he peeled it. He batted her away as she tried to grab for a segment. “No you’ll die.” He sighed.

“I don’t know.” Robin teases, ignoring his conversation with his cat. “You did just turn thirty.”

“Hmm thanks for reminding me. Though I do hope to live past 60. My great grandma is nearing a hundred and still kicking.”

“So you say.”

“So I say, so my mother says, so my grandfather translates because we are all too lazy to learn Italian and she’s too stubborn to learn English.”

“Macché!” Robin said.

“Yeah… No clue babe.”

“Well they look good. By the way. The piercings.”

“Mm.” Steve hummed, as he swallowed the satsuma. “I forgot to say - guess who I saw in the piercing shop?”

“Uh…Carl?” Robin.

“Oh god no, Jesus can you imagine? No Eddie.”

“Munson?”

Steve nodded.

“Oh shit yeah he has a concert here tonight, right?” Robin asked.

“Yeah and he fucking invited me.”

“That’s so exciting!”.

“You don’t actually think I should go?” Steve asked.

“Of course you should go, its Eddie!”

“I haven’t spoken to him in years though isn’t it awkward? He was probably just being nice.”

“Eddie doesn’t know how to just be nice, he says what he thinks when he thinks it, you know that.”

“Why would I know that?”

“Steve. I know its been years but the connection we had with everyone back then, that doesn’t go away. Plus I know you have a crush on him. You never stop humming those songs of his”

Steve rolled his eyes. “I just got broken up with.”

“All the more reason. So did he.”

“Really? How do you know?”

“Because. I talk to him, on the phone, quite frequently.”

“I didn’t know we still talked to people from back home.”

“We don’t. But I do. The past couple years at least.”

“Well..”

“He asks about you.” Robin interjected.

“He does?”

“He does. Probably thinks we still live together. As far as he’s aware you’ve been in touch - by proxy. Go to his fucking concert. Talk to him. You need more friends, I can’t be your sole cat sitter when Derek’s in Canada.”

Steve rolled his eyes, took a sip of his tea and looked down at Brandy who was padding at his thigh.

“What would I even wear?”

Robin grinned at him.

-

Robin delighted in her creation, Steve standing in front of her bathroom mirror in one of her black tank tops applying her pencil eyeliner to his waterline.

“You better not have pink eye.” He said.

“Hey you're the one too pussy to go to your apartment and get your own stuff.”

“Broken up with. 8 hours ago.” Steve said.

Robin threw her hands up in surrender. “Yeah you’re right you’re right, you get a pass.”

“I get a hundred passes. At least.”

By the time Steve was ready to go he was, despite the rolling of Robin’s eyes, desperate for a cigarette.

“Make sure your whole head is out that window, dingus.” She said.

Steve nodded, before a hand was grabbing his arm as it moved to bring the lighter up to the cigarette in his mouth. “Not a chance.”

“Tina!” Steve said, dropping his hand, taking the unlit cigarette from him mouth. “Didn’t Robin tell you, I have a heartbreak pass?!”

“She did, but you don’t. These curtains were expensive and I don’t need them stinking of tobacco.”

“Fine.” He said. “I’ll just smoke outside while I wait for the taxi.” He pulled his shoes on, watching as Robin climbed onto Tina's lap and kissed her on the cheek. “You girls okay looking after Brandy for a bit longer?”

“Mhm.” Tina nodded. “She’s my baby.” She said as Brandy rubbed against her shins.

“She’s my enemy.” Robin added. “She knocked over the mug I made for Tina in that pottery class.”

“She was doing you a favor.” Steve laughed, winking at Tina. “All right I should go.” He said dodging out of the way of the cushion Robin threw at him. He stopped right before he reached the door.

“Hold on, is it cold out? Will I need a jacket?”

Tina rolled her eyes, chucking the leather jacket she had been wearing over at him.

“Don’t get anything gross on it.” She said.

“I just got broken up with.” He retorted.

“Yeah.” Tina sighed. “Exactly.”

-

Steve couldn’t help but feel important, walking past the queue of people lining the street outside, leaning over to the guard by the back door and with only a few words having the door opened for him, and being ushered inside.

But Angie didn’t tell him which door was Eddie’s or which direction he ought to go and the superiority he had felt at being allowed inside diminished into a small scared ball at the pit of his stomach wondering why he was even there in the first place. Luckily, Eddie was walking out of the bathroom as he passed the door. From the leather pants Steve could tell he was already in his stage outfit, but he had pulled on a bottle green sweatshirt over the top that looked uncannily like the Hawkins High apparel.

“Harrington you made it!” He pulled Steve into a hug. “You look lost.”

“Yeah…” Steve chuckled. “Uh yeah. I was I guess. I don’t really know what -“

Eddie looked bemused. “Come with me.” He turned heel and skipped to the end of the corridor, looking back to check Steve was tailing behind, before opening a door. It was plain white painted with a silver handle, the same as every other door in the corridor, bar the bathroom. Not even a sign or anyway to tell where it led. How was he ever supposed to find that?

“Welcome to my humble abode.” Eddie said, bowing as he swung the door open for Steve. God, had Eddie managed to get weirder? “Would you like a drink sir Harrington.” He spoke in a very bad British accent.

Steve chortled. “Sure thing Munson, you freak.”

“Oh hoho the bitch is back.” Eddie laughed as he poured himself and Steve a whisky. “This whisky costs more than your car.” He said.

“I actually don’t have a car.” Steve admitted, taking the glass Eddie offered. “So that’s not hard to beat.”

Eddie frowned. “Seriously? Wasn’t that your USP in high school? Harrington feels up girls in the back of his Beamer?”

“Ha okay, first of all, I didn’t feel them up, that sounds creepy. Secondly, that’s kind of the point, don’t need a car when you aren’t trying to impress girls anymore. Also kinda pointless, when you live a walkable distance from work and your friends and can borrow your boyfriends car when you have to.”

Eddie swallowed, nodding slowly. “So did he drive you here, this boyfriend?”

Steve sat down, huffed slightly, regretted everything he had said thus far that had bought him to the topic of Derek so quickly.

“No. No.” He said. “Got a taxi.” Not yet drunk enough to disclose why.

Eddie nodded, the silence settled between them, he knocked back the whisky. Steve did the same. “So…you nervous?” Steve asked.

“What?”

“Like, for the concert?”

“Oh.” Eddie laughed. “No no. Yeah a bit. I mean normal amount of oh shit don’t fuck up nerves but, I don’t know, just another day in the office these days.”

“Pretty crazy office.”

“Yeah it is.”

A warmth settled in Steve’s stomach with the whisky, he began to relax. “You speak to Dustin much these days?”

Eddie nodded “Yeah, yeah that kids going places man it’s crazy.”

“Say’s you.” Steve laughed.

A warm smile slid across Eddie’s face, a tinge of pink in his cheeks. “Yeah.” He took a sip of his drink. “So…sorry I should know - what do you do for work?”

"Oh um" Steve placed down his glass. “I work with foster kids - sort of mid-way between social worker and carer - I work with the social workers who obviously deal with more of the admin side and the legal stuff - I basically spend time with the kids and see how they are and make sure they’re settling into the care home or their foster home or see if they want to go back with their parents and if it's a good idea.”

“Still a babysitter then?” Eddie smiled.

“Yeah, still the goddamn babysitter,”

“That’s admirable though, sounds like something you’d be good at. You know I was in care for a bit so - would have been nice if someone like you was around. Back then I mean.”

“Yeah? Yeah I like it, feels good. And I help a lot of kids you know?”

“Your boyfriends a lucky man.” Eddie said.

“Is that so?” Steve laughed.

“Yeah jeez, I can’t seem to find a decent guy let alone one who cares about anyone other than himself.”

"Hmm." Steve hummed into his glass. “Robin said you went through a break up recently?”

“Oh she did? Yeah. I mean it was a month ago now but still fresh. I don’t know.” Eddie said, looking up at Steve. There was a look, that doe eyed sparkle in his eyes, the softness of his mouth, the way he never seemed to falter even when he was saying the most poignant things. Almost like it didn’t make a difference to him, words were just words. But they still poured out of him like honey. “Steve, to be honest I-“ They were interrupted by the door swinging open behind Eddie. A stage manager wearing all black and an oversized headset stood impatiently in the doorframe.

“You're on Eddie, let’s go.”

Eddie pulled off his sweater to reveal a long sleeve fishnet shirt and a leather studded vest on top. Steves eyes couldnt help but dance over his torso, at the plethora of new tattoos since he'd seen him last. Or since hed seen his torso at least.

"You're staring, Harrington." Eddie said.

"You look uh..good." Steve replied.

Eddie smiled. "Come on," he reached out his hand for Steve to take. " You can watch from the wings."

God, if Robin wasn't right about his crush on Eddie before, watching him on stage really solidified it. And it felt kind of wrong, because he was, despite himself, in love with Derek. And though he had managed to hold it back all day, perhaps it was because of the music or the thumping bass that vibrated through his body, Steve finally began to cry.

And maybe it was the emotions or maybe it was alcohol he had drank to subdue them, but as soon as Eddie got off stage Steve couldn’t stop himself asking:

"Do you want to fuck?"

Eddie huffed in shock, wiping a towel over his head from the sweat that had gathered there on stage, a grin curling across his lips. "Uh. You have a boyfriend."

Steve shook his head. "We broke up this morning." He stepped back, ran his hand through his hair. " Listen its a bad idea obviously, but you're hot and I want to fuck him out of my system. Plus whats the likelihood of seeing each other again?"

Eddie bit his lip thought for a second, the adrenaline from performing still coursing through his body. "Fuck sake Harrington. Of course I want to fuck you. Why else would I invite you here?"

"Great."

"But you have to host." Eddie said. " You may think getting a number 1 on the rock charts and selling out venues across the country is glamorous but I share a hotel room with my band."

"Right. Yeah I can host." Steve said. If he was more sober he might have worried about seeing Derek. As it goes he was inebriated enough to not give a shit.

-

Steve fumbled with the light switch as Eddie pushed him up against the wall, their mouths smashing together, Steve’s hands reaching into Eddie’s hair, eagerly gripping onto the man to pull him closer.

“Steve.” Derek was standing in the bedroom door frame.

Eddie untangled himself from Steve, leant against the wall beside him, eying the man in front of them.

“Why are you still here?" Steve spat, his voice aggressive, his mannerisms anything but. He seemed to fold into himself, keep his eyes on the ground.

“I was waiting for you to come home - I - I didn’t want to leave without talking to you properly.”

“I don’t want to talk to you Derek. I want to have sex with my friend and forget about you forever.”

“Steve.” Eddie said beside him, his voice soft. “I should leave.”

Steve looked over at Eddie, he wanted to say no don’t go, stay. But he also knew he too wanted to talk to Derek, if he was honest with himself. Because no matter the circumstances, losing someone you loved for 6 years isn’t easy, and goodbye’s are worth having, even if they’re hard.

“Yeah.” Steve sighed. “Keep in touch.”

Eddie nodded and headed out, only lingering by the door long enough to hear Derek say “Was that the singer Eddie Munson?”

-

It was only months before the next time Steve saw Eddie. Eddie had taken heed of the request Steve had made before he left and kept in touch. Not often, but they exchanged phonecalls every few weeks, normally through Robin who was good at keeping in touch with everyone and passed the phone over to Steve when he was at her apartment, which had increased in frequency since Derek’s departure.

“Eddie’s coming over.” Robin said, over coffee. “Tomorrow.”

“To yours?”

She nodded.

“Is he in town for a show?”

She shook her head, putting her coffee down. “He’s finished his tour he just wanted to visit.”

“Oh.” Steve said. “Nice. Nice, it will be good to see him.”

“Mhm.” Robin said, eyeing Steve over her coffee. “You gonna try and fuck him again?”

“Oh shut up.” Steve rolled his eyes.

“Well if you do. Go to your own apartment.” Robin said.

-

Steve didn’t want to admit that he was expecting to pick up where they left off. Not to himself or to anyone. Because he didn’t want to seem desperate. It felt okay to just say ‘let’s fuck’ when you had had a rough day. But that kind of gall definitely didn’t live in him without the right kind of motivation. But it didn’t mean he didn’t prepare to be having sex that evening, just tucked that information away. It was a just in case situation. He wasn’t expecting sex of course, it was nice to just have a friend in Eddie. And if he had started thinking about him more and more since Derek had moved out, if he had bought tapes of all of Eddie’s albums and listened to them on repeat, if he had felt himself get shy and giggly every time he spoke to Eddie on the phone - well that was just details.

Eddie arrived while Robin and Tina were still out at work. Leaving Steve with the responsibility of letting Eddie in.

“Is this Brandy?” Eddie asked, nodding at the cat that was laying in Steve’s arms like a baby.

“Yes she's extremely spoiled.” Steve responded, letting Eddie in.

“You’re so gay.” Eddie replied.

“No way.” Steve exclaimed, shutting the door behind Eddie. “Are you serious? I’m gay? Big news.”

Eddie put his stuff down and started taking his shoes off. “You can be sarcastic all you want but if you told 19 year old me that Steve Harrington ends up gay I’d think I lost my mind.”

“Oh I kept it buried deeeeeep inside.” Steve let Brandy climb up onto his shoulder.

“Not the only thing you kept deep inside.” Eddie joked.

Steve felt his face flush pink, opened his mouth to say something, instead let out a ‘Hmmm aaaahh. You want a drink?”

“Great segue. Yeah can I just get a water actually?”

Steve nodded, put Brandy down and disappeared into the kitchen to get some drinks.

-

“So did you see my SNL performance?” Eddie asked. They were sat out on the balcony, enjoying the first creepings of heat at the end of spring. Eddie smoked, Steve said he was quitting but took a few drags anyway.

“Yeah you were great. Getting introduced by Pamela Anderson too. Holy shit.”

“She’s super nice too.” Eddie said. “Too bad she’s married.”

“Oh yeah because you’d have the guts to hit on her."

“I might. If I hadn’t quit drinking at least.”

“Sure you would.” Steve laughed.

“I had the guts to kiss you didn’t I?"

Steve passed the cigarette back to Eddie, their hands brushing.

“Would you have the guts to kiss me again?”

Eddie grinned. “Finally.”

They were lying on the couch, hands in each other's hair, tongues in eachothers mouths when Robin and Tina came home. Robin’s initial excited ‘Heeeeeellllooooooo” turned quickly into a “No! Steve! Eddie! Get a room!”

Eddie jumped up. “Robin! Tina!” Pulling them into a hug.

“If you guys are going to hook up go over to Steve’s please.” She said.

Eddie tutted. “We just go sidetracked. I’m here to spend time with you all.”

“Hmm. Good. I was thinking we could go to that new Thai place for dinner.” Robin said.

“It’s like crazy hard to get a reservation but my friend works there, can get us in.” Tina added.

“Sounds good.” Steve said.

“Sounds amazing.” Eddie added.

It was amazing. The food was delicious, the ambience was calming but there was enough chatter about the place that it felt comfortable, where they didn't feel the need to awkwardly whisper or suppress their laughter. Eddie got recognised a couple times, asked for an autograph once and Steve couldn’t stop staring at the way he interacted with his fans. Couldn’t believe that the man who used to spend his recess sitting in corridors quoting Lord of the Rings and whispering to himself in class while doodling wizards and orcs all over his textbooks - was now this cool famous guy. Like okay maybe he still wasn’t cool but fame is just international popularity and high school Eddie was anything but. And he handled it so well, better than King Steve had managed his short lived reign of high school. And worst of all, Steve just couldn’t stop thinking about fucking that nerd.

And when the girls were distracted by their own conversation Eddie slid his hand under the table and squeezed Steve's thigh with a wink. Steve almost knocked the table over, the way he jumped. The girls immediately shooting suspicious looks over at them. But the suspicion didn't last, when Eddie said "So where are the best clubs, round here?"

They ended up in a gay club (obviously) - one that was super exclusive and often frequented by celebrities. Robin and Steve had been waiting for an excuse to convince Eddie to go with them, given that he was their only ticket into the club. And it was just as incredible as they had always imagined. It was also almost impossible to keep Robin tethered to her chair to avoid her embarrassing herself in front of Queen Latifah who was trying to innocently get a drink when Robin, beet red and shaking, asked for her autograph. At that point Robin, who said she could die happy, wanted to go home and Tina, who didn’t like the Thai food, was hungry and so they left the club.

“You don’t want to leave yet do you?” Eddie asked.

“Not a chance Eddie. They’re playing ABBA” Steve said, dragging Eddie to the dance floor, admiring the way the lights looked splashed across his face.

Steve hadn’t ever been to a club sober before. In fact he hadn't been to a club in years. Normally he would be in bed by 9pm these days. But there, with Eddie staring into his soul with those big brown eyes there was nothing he wanted more than to just keep dancing. The hands that Eddie ran down Steve waist as they danced only inspiring him to stay awake longer. Eventually, both sweaty and with cracked voices from screaming along to the songs (despite the fact Eddie said the music was the ‘most ridiculous pop trash I’ve ever heard’) they found themselves in the stairwell, Eddie’s hands creeping under Steve’s shirt, tracing the lines of his scars beneath his fingertips.

“Come back to mine.” Steve whispered into Eddie’s skin as he kissed down his neck. As he spoke the lights came on above them, signalling the place was closing.

Eddie looked up at the light above, “What time does this place close?”

“5am? I think.” Steve looked at his watch. “Yeah, jeez that went fast.”

“Oh shit.”

“What?”

“My coach is at 5:30 I have to go.” Eddie pulled back.

“What? Nooo.” Steve whined, pulling Eddie back by his belt loops.

“I have to go baby. Don’t worry, I’ll call.” He slinked away.

“I’ll get you in bed some day Munson.” Steve called.

Eddie turned in the doorway, winked and disappeared into the dawn.

-

It was pride, the next time Eddie was in town. It's his first pride since publicly coming out, which meant he could publicly celebrate. It also meant he was invited to perform. Which was a very big deal. I mean generally he wasn't playing to crowds of people in neon outfits, short shorts and leather- well okay maybe not the leather- but the gist of it was what if they hated him? What if he wasn't the type of music they wanted? What if being gay wasn't enough to officially be part of gay culture?

"Eddie." Tina said, her hand on his shoulder as he sat on her kitchen stool. "Being gay is all you have to do to be loved by the gays. Stop fretting."

"But I am fretting."

"The metal scene isn't as straight as you think, you should know that more than anyone."

"Well I also know more than anyone thats it kinda is. You know how many homophobes started burning my tapes and tour merch after i came out."

"They weeded themselves out."

"Doesn't mean I don't have a specifc market."

"Lesbians." Robin interrupted. "Butch leather lesbians."

Eddie sat back for a minute. Took a breath. "Holy shit, you're right."

"Yeah. As per. Now move I need to get the waffle iron out of that cupboard." She shooed him from the kitchen, so he slumped over the back of the sofa, landing ungracefully in Steve's lap, his hair splayed over the armrest. Steve almost unconsciously began stroking it, like a primate picking out lice, the innate urge to groom your loved ones.

"You'll be fine, Eds. I spoke to all the San Fran gays and they promised they won't boo."

"Oh you know all the gays in San Fransisco?"

"Yeah what do you think I've been doing since Derek left? Or who do you think I've been doing?"

Eddie slapped him playfully on the arm, sat up too quickly, had to hold onto Steve's shoulder to ride out the head rush. "Well that gives me absolutely no reassurance. Don't you exclusively date liars?"

Steve shrugged. "I'm trying something new."

Eddie of course had nothing to worry about. The performance went great, and even those in the crowd who had no idea who he was, still seemed incredibly grateful at his outfit choice of tasselled leather chaps (over his jeans, I know what you are thinking) and not much else. Steve was also incredibly thankful, and chose to communicate his gratitude with his mouth, after finally getting Eddie back to his apartment later that evening. He had him pressed against his dresser, mouthing the stubble that lined Eddie’s jaw.

“God I bet all those guy out there wish they had you like this.” Steve groaned into Eddie’s neck.

“I’m all yours baby.” Eddie replied.

Steve nuzzled into Eddie’s ear. “Fucking finally.” He said as he began to sink to his knees. Only he didn’t make it to the ground, his pager beeping in his back pocket shocking him into standing up straight, so quickly his head hit into Eddie’s face with a thunk. Eddie’s hand flung to his face, his nose immediately spurting blood. Steve held the pager in his hand staring at the code displayed - his eyes darting between the pager screen and Eddie’s face.

“I’m so sorry.” He reached out and placed a hand on Eddie’s shoulder. "Are you okay? I really have to- do you need ice? I have to get this its an emergency. Do you need a kleenex? I’ll be just a moment to - I have to call -"

“Steve, calm down, take the call I’m-" He pinched the edge of his nose, hissing at the pain. “I’m fine.”

Steve returned to the bedroom five minutes later with a box of Kleenex and a worried look on his face. Eddie, who had made himself comfortable in Steve’s bedroom, was already holding tissues against his nose. “I found some in your top draw, next to some lotion and a butt plug. I wonder what you use these tissues for.”

“You little snoop.”

“My nose is bleeding because of your fat head so I felt I was entitled to a little snooping.” Eddie sat up straighter, his tone changing. “What’s going on?”

“I have to go.” Steve said.

“It’s bad, huh?”

“One of my kids - one of the kids I look after - she ran away from her foster parents place and …I think I know where she’ll have gone. I’m sorry.”

Eddie nodded. “Don’t apologise it’s - you go. I’ll just annoy Robin and Tina until my flight.”

Steve laughed pulling his shoes on, kissing Eddie on the cheek. “Let yourself out.”

Eddie sighed. “I’ll get you into bed one day, Harrington.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Steve huffed, waving as he left the apartment.

-

“What are you doing?”

“Hello? Eddie? That is no way to start a phone call.”

“Okay sorry. Hello Steve, it’s Eddie. Munson. How are you?”

“I’m good thank you, I’m actually making soup right now.”

“Wow your life is so exciting.”

“Sorry Mr Rockstar we can’t all spend our evenings snorting cocaine off half naked women.”

“Hey that was one time - I am sober now.”

“Yeah exactly, so maybe you should get into soup.”

“Sigh yeah okay Steve. Anyway I didn’t mean what are you doing now, I meant what are you doing for Christmas?”

“Same as usual, just gonna stay in San Fran.”

“Oh come on Steve. Not the same as usual, I know Robin’s visiting Tina’s family in Mexico. Don’t spend Christmas alone.”

“I won’t be alone, I have Brandy.”

“Goddammit Harrington, you’re depressing me. Come to Wayne’s with me.”

“No, no I couldn’t.”

“Please Steve, I want you to. Wayne has to work til midnight Christmas Eve anyway, so I’ll be bored out of my mind. You can bring Brandy too if you want, Wayne loves cats.”

“Hmm. She hates travelling. My neighbours probably wouldn’t mind taking her.”

“So is that a yes?”

“Yeah…yeah its a yes.”

“Nice.”

“Thank you Eddie, for the invite. Means a lot.”

-

Steve felt 19 years old again, sitting in his car outside that trailer. It wasn't technically the same trailer, the one he had pulled Eddie's lifeless body through an interdimensional hole in the ceiling. That trailer was stripped down to the bones and rebuilt. Wasn't even on the same plot of land, a couple hundred meters east. That land ended up cemented to within an inch of its life. They built a gas station on it. Regardless, the trailer sat in the trailer park, looking eerily identical. This was why he never came back to Hawkins. At least thats what he told himself. His lack of people to come back for only minor details.

There was a thwack on the roof, Steve jumped, crash landed right back into reality. Eddie was leaning against the car, a cigarette hanging from his mouth.

"I thought that was you. Why are you just sitting in your car like a creep?"

Steve bristled, pulled himself together, pushed the car door open slowly enough that Eddie had time to get out of the way.

"Just lost in thought."

"Good ones I hope." Eddie held out his hand, an offer to take Steve's bags. Steve shook his head, Eddie shrugged and skipped ahead, held the door open for Steve.

It smelt different. At least than memory served. Perhaps it was that Wayne had quit smoking, that Eddie wasn't ever there long enough to let his own habits sink into the furnishings.

Eddie motioned to the pull out bed. "We'll be out here. The bedrooms Waynes now so…"

"Yeah, yeah of course." Steve put his bags down by the sofa. "Should I take off my shoes?"

"Depends what you wanna do."

"What are the options?"

"We could go for a walk. You know…" He mimed smoking a joint. "Wayne doesn't like me doing it in the house."

"I could use a walk."

They returned to the trailer bleary eyed and shivering slightly from their shared inability to dress for the weather. "I have an excuse." Steve said. "I live in California now I'm not used to it. Whats your excuse East Coast?"

"My excuse is that I have an aesthetic to uphold."

"Slutty emo."

"Something like that."

Steve threw his shoes off and immediately tucked himself under the covers on the pull out bed, shuddering as he held the duvet over him.

"You wanna watch a movie?" Eddie asked puling on an old Hawkins High band hoodie Steve snorted at.

"Yeah sure, band geek." Eddie reached over Steve and slid his hands down the front of Steve's shirt. Steve jolted up pulling Eddie's cold hands off of him. "Horrible boy." He said. Eddie laughed, reaching for a VHS from the shelf above the TV.

"I think you're gonna hate this one." Eddie said.

Steve did hate it. It was a christmas movie, he'd give him that, but Jack Frost was not a feel good movie.

"That's the freakiest snowman I've ever seen I would molotov that guy in a heartbeat." Steve said.

As it turned out it didn't much matter that Steve didn't like the movie, having missed most of it after Eddie innocently brushed a hair out of Steve's face resulting in them aggressively making out on the creaky cot. That wasn’t the intention, that time, to actually try to sleep with one another. They had wanted only to not be alone over the holidays. And it felt rude, both of them technically being guests in Wayne's house. So when Wayne came home early, and Steve practically jumped across the room and out of Eddie’s arms, it wasn’t a disappointment to either of them, that they hadn’t managed to make it past first base.

“Good evening boys. Steve.” Wayne said.

“Hi, thanks for having me Mr Munson.” Steve said, still stood awkwardly at the end of the bed.

“I got let off early.” Wayne said. “Bought Chinese food.” He placed the bags on the side. “I wasn’t sure if you were vegetarian or nothing so I got a mix of everything.”

“I like everything.” Steve said.

“Mmm me too.” Eddie said climbing out of bed and rifling through the bag over Wayne's shoulder. He turned to Steve, shoving a prawn cracker in his mouth. "Shall we move the bed back against the wall so we can eat and watch TV."

Wayne grunted his approval while pulling plates and cutlery out of the cupboard. Steve got to work pushing the bed back, leaving space for the two of them to climb on top of it, but giving Wayne's armchair a clear view of the TV.

"Good?" Steve asked.

"Great." Eddie replied, before jumping onto the bed. "Now can you get me some food. Pleeeaaase."

"What do you want?" Steve asked edging around the bed toward the kitchen.

"Noodles and -"

"Don't humor him boy." Wayne interrupted, patting Steve on the shoulder as he passed him on his way to his armchair. "We can't let the fame get to his head. Get your own damn food." He kicked playfully at Eddie from where he was sitting, just a little too far away to reach him.

Eddie slinked into the kitchen, wrapped his arm around Steve's waist as he plated up, nuzzled into his neck, taking advantage of the fact Wayne was focused on flicking through the TV channels.

Steve couldn't help but lean back into the touch. Couldn't help but imagine a universe where he was Eddie's boyfriend, where they'd be doing the same thing, spending christmas together, stealing kisses behind Wayne's back, watching movies together as a family.

The warmth of the night spent comfortable together was enough to send Steve to sleep. He couldn’t tell you what they had been watching before he drifted off, doesn’t know if he had crawled beneath the bedding himself or if Wayne had gone to bed yet. But he woke up, later that night, eyes blinking slowly open as the TV flashed across the dark room.

“Eddie.” He said, reaching out into the dark.

“I’m here.” Eddie whispered. “Was just going for a piss if you must know.” Steve felt the bed wobble as Eddie climbed on, the mattress dipping and frame creaking as he got comfortable.

“Probably should have turned the TV off while I was up.” He said.

Steve’s arms snaked around Eddie’s waist. He wasn’t entirely sure he was entirely awake. He wasn’t entirely sure what inspired him to say it, as Eddie fidgeted slightly beside him.

“If you could just stay still for five minutes I think I could fall in love with you.” Steve said. Eddie didn’t reply. Steve wasn’t entirely sure he had said it aloud.

-

Eddie decided to stay still. For the next year at least.

Steve had gotten his first tattoo - a butterfly on his wrist - when he came home to see Robin (who always lets herself in) and Eddie (who Robin had let in).

“I didn’t know you were visiting.” Steve said, throwing his arms immediately around Eddie, pulling him into a tight hug.

“I’m not.” Eddie said, pulling back, holding Steve’s wrist gently, grinnning down at the dark ink pooling in the seran wrap. “You always manage to surprise me, Harrington.”

Steve pulled his hand away coyly. “Oh I uh…what do you mean you aren’t visiting?”

“I’m not visiting. I bought a place down the road.”

“Oh?” Steve resented himself for the grin that sat stubbornly on his face.

“Yeah.” Eddie said, reaching out again to look at Steve’s tattoo again. “I figured I ought to stay still for a while.”

Robin shrugged, said “Sorry I’m busy,” when Eddie asked.

“Busy doing what?”

“Anything but helping you unpack.”

“Just you and me then I guess.” Eddie said, thumping Steve gently on the chest in an uncharacteristic display of masculinity.

“Who said I would help?” Steve taunted, though it took only an elbow nudge and a suggestive grin for Steve to relent, crack a smile and nod, following Eddie out the door.

Eddie didn't have a lot of stuff. “Move around too much.” He shrugged. But Steve couldn’t take that “We are going to IKEA tomorrow okay?”

“Really?”

“Yeah.” Steve insisted. “Think of how good this place would look with a couple rugs, some plants, some nice fucking lighting.”

“Whatever you say man.” Eddie sighed, lifting a particularly heavy box onto the kitchen counter. “There’s still like three boxes in the van.”

“Yeah and they’re all nerd books.”

“Yeah well, that’s why I need your strong arms helping me.”

“My strong arms can help you.” Steve winked.

“No no stop that.”

Steve moved closer, crowding Eddie against the counter. “We moved the mattress in first though.” Steve whispered against Eddie’s neck.

Eddie threw his head back and sighed. “But we still have stuff to do.”

Steve kissed down Eddie’s neck. “Don’t you think we waited long enough?”

“You’re a bad influence, Harrington.”

Steve gently caressed Eddie’s jaw, pulled him into a passionate kiss, grinding his hip against Eddie. Eddie clinged to his back, eagerly pulling Steve closer, feeling the edge of the counter press into his back he didn’t care he just wanted more of Steve. But, leaving him breathless and eager, Steve stepped away from Eddie.

“No.” Steve said. “No you’re right. We ought to finish unpacking.” He moved halfway across the room before he felt a tug at his wrist, just above his new tattoo, and Eddie pulled him back into his arms. “You fucking tease, Steve.”

They made it, just about, to the mattress that sat in the centre of the bedroom. It was yet to be made, no bedsheet or covers, and the bedframe was still leaning against the wall in an unopened box. But they had waited long enough.

If it weren’t for the growing darkness beyond the curtainless windows, the men would have not noticed the time. Sweaty and half nude, a blanket pulled over them that smelt of dust retrieved from a box in the kitchen post coital, when the chill began to set in, Eddie leant over to reach his watch from the carpet where it lay discarded amongst his jewellery. Eddie laughed, his voice hoarse.

“Goddammit we know how to waste time.” He said. “Happy Valentine’s Day, babe.” He said, showing the watch face to Steve, the minute hand ticking slowly past midnight.

Valentines Day 1999

“Happy one year anniversary baby.” Eddie said, crawling on top of the bed where Steve had just woken up. Eddie pushed the box, wrapped up with a bow, in front of Steve, who sat up and pulled his glasses on.

“I told you, you didn’t have to get me anything.”

"Yes I did.” Eddie inisted. “You would have moped so bad if I didn’t.”

Steve grinned, pulling his hand through his hair, trying to neaten what the night had done to it. “Yeh well I did find you that rare Iron Maiden record that you insisted on opening early.”

“I had to find out if it was genuine or if you’d gotten ripped off!” Eddie retorted. “Anyway, go on, open it.” Eddie nodded toward the box in front of him, rocking slightly in excitement.

“What’s the ru-" Steve stopped. "Did the box just meow?"

Eddie grinned.

"You did not." Steve’s eyes grew wide.

"I did." Eddie nodded, restraining himself from jumping on the bed.

Steve finally opened the box and pulled out a black cat, a bright red bow tied around its neck.

"Watch out, she’s a scratcher." Eddie pulls up his sleeve, showing the scratches up his arm. "I thought about getting you a kitten but I knew you had an affection for strays."

Steve sighed lovingly as the cat curled up at his side.

"She's perfect.” Steve said. “I just hope her and Brandy get on"

“I think it’s Robin we have to worry about.”

[henrioo]

HEADCANNON — Do you see Killer as an TransMasc dude?

I mean… he may or may not have top surgery scars, which I’ll explain later, but what he actuall was before the pre-timeskip?

He was a man, who definitely was on T-shots not even half a year. Having a binder crushing his chest, moving fast — but hardly breathing, no wonder why his voice was rather deep. He tried to hide the fact that he hardly got any air during the fights or such.

The slimness during the Sabaody Arc, no facial hair, fast movements… that’s the second when my brain automatically shoved the thought of him being a part of the LGBTQ. Just look at this dude two years later:

He grew out his thick hair, took care of it. Jaw and chin covered in his golden goatee, while his body grew at least thrice as wide as two years before. Man… I know for sure that during those years he was high on his Testosterone level.

But the best part comes along with the explanation of the top surgery marks he might hide underneath his t-shirt. I believe that during the long time of waiting until the Kid Pirates come back to screen, Killer and his crew recently has visited the Revolutionary Army on their way to Wano.

And who’s the most queer diva in there? Of course it’s them — Ivankov.

The one who actually said: “Boy, you seem uncomfortable while moving. Do you perhaps need some help with gender dysphoria, hun’?”

Then the change happened, the scars lasted, but the short and painful process of his body turning fully male was worth it. Feeling like himself encouraged him to train more and gain weight, muscles, and all possible benefits.

So… if you ever read it, I really want to know your opinion about this. It’s not common to see a male-blog only, which I appreciate truly.

— Cheers, Musashi.

Okay I love this ask and I love you now and we two gonna be best friends okay?

And yes now I'm a only male blog and I genuinely love talking with more male authors we need to have a strong community

So here all my opinion about this

Like Sanji is a gay coded character for me, Killer is also one, and in the two examples I'm sure Oda didn't do it on purpose but he did a pretty good job

For me Killer has a lot of coded trans signals that make me feel he genuinely would be a perfect trans character, so here what I feel more

First his name, even one piece has some "weird" names, Killer looks more a name that someone would give to himself, not a weird normal name in one piece that someone would be born with

Since we don't know too much about the childhood of the kid pirates, it is hard to be sure, but I think it is obvious that killer chose his own name. If it is for the reason he is trans or not doesn't really matter, everyone can think whatever they want

Also the mask, we know that killer is far from being ugly but he always had the mask after he grew up a little, and I think that was pure insecure about his face. I think in the start before the T and those things people didn't take him seriously because his face wasn't really masculine or scary, and to try fight against that he started using the mask, also because that would help him having a more strong voice, since the mask would muffle his voice

Kid protection, I think is more than perfect their bond, and is obviously that Killer trusts in Kid his own life and soul. And for me this is the perfect way to show that Kid is a true ally to his friends transition, when they meet again in the prison he even asks to killer "where are your mask?" Because he knows his friend would never be without that

Not only that, he genuinely killed everyone that laughed about Killer no matter why they are laughing, that for me is perfect to show how Kid grows up seeing Killer suffering from intolerant people and becomes aggressive in a way to protect him

But I'm not sure about Iva, I don't think the Revolutionary Army would risk being close to Kid because he had one of the worst reputations between the pirates. And even if they would have a change the Kid owes a favor to them I don't think it would be a good choice, because they couldn't know if Kid would be pacific enough or not

And what we know for now is that the Revolutionary Army don't really have bonds with pirates exactly because they are impressive and dangerous

So I think that Killer got such a big man because of... Drugs

Yeah no joking

The crew would definitely get T enough for Killer besides I think they would have this in a constant way, what can explain why he takes two years to be that big

But I also think he used some anabolic steroids, or anything like that but in the one piece universe. I don't think they would be really hard to get and they probably are not safe, but they probably work better than the ones we have in the real world.

So if I could say the reason why killer got big is this one, Kid probably got some suspicious drugs and Killer used and there we are. We already know those dudes don't give a shit about risking their life and they are like "worthy to try"

Also I can see Law helping Killer with some surgery, but then Kid finds out that Law is also a captain and he gets mad because they get help from an enemy, and he is not blaming Killer but blaming Law and Law is just "wtf I literally help you?"

But yeah

Thanks for that, I love having someone to talk about this hahahha

[sagemoderocklee]

song lyrics for the fic title thing

>Hold the line Love isn't always on time (hold the line)

>I'm fearless now But it cost my soul (killer)

>Take my heart, don't lose it or To know you is to love you (cheri cheri lady)

> And thinking of someone for whom he still burns or He's haunted by something he cannot define (the distance)

>I don't care if it hurts me I wanna be worthy or And made sure you never see Any ugly from me (my ugly)

woah anon you really came ready to provide distractions thank you i love you

long so under a cut and boy was this a challenge to come up with ideas for all these! thank you anon! i had so much fun with this and i hope you like the ideas i came up with

hold the line love isn't always on time definitely gettin a late in life romance vibe from this one. gaara is finally set to retire from being Kazekage. he's 40 years old but feels fucking ancient because of all the obvious reasons--living weapon, child soldier, died at 15 and resurrected, host of a tailed beast, Kazekage since 14 and so on. not to mention changing the very foundations of Suna and shinobi life. he's done a lot. he can step down and let his niece take over as the last true Kazekage because with her things are finally truly changing and he knows she'll make him proud...Gaara is definitely ready for a reprieve from it all, but then his niece still needs his support and guidance so okay maybe his retirement doesn't actually start right when he wants it to and maybe he's 45 when he's finally, truly DONE with it all and can fucking breathe and experience things he's otherwise only indulged in in secrecy and in the most fleeting moments... maybe now he's not Kazekage he can finally just live. live for himself for once. and in living for himself he take a vacation and runs into Lee who retired years earlier due to his body just giving out from all those years of using the Gates, and maybe Gaara'd told himself he was too old for love to find him now and maybe he'd lied to himself and said he was okay with never having a proper lover, a proper romance--it was always secret trysts with other closeted diplomats and dignitaries; it was never anything real. but here's Rock Lee, long time friend, one time opponent, and he's looking at Gaara like he's the reason the stars shine so bright and maybe, just maybe he's not too old after all

I'm fearless now But it cost my soul Lee's always wanted to be like everyone else. able to do ninjutsu, able to be a normal shinobi. but everything comes with a price and wishing to be just like everyone else means losing what makes him him... history rewrites itself. Lee and Gai were never close; Lee and Neji never had a feud, and so their friendship was never all that strong; Tenten and Lee are perfectly fine, there's really not much difference there surprisingly... but then it gets to the memories of his match with Gaara and.. he'd lost that, just like he did before only... it had been unimpressive. his loss is instant, he wasn't disabled by it and he didn't prove anything to anyone, least of all gaara... and that had made all the difference. Gaara was less fractured, less volatile without his fight with Lee. And he'd been less open to changing his ways when he and Naruto faced each other. without Lee's influence, Gaara had still been the child-monster and with it comes the death of a loved one, and Lee wants to stop it all. he wants to take back his wish, he wants to go back to being different, to being what he'd been before. but he's 25 years old and he cant rewrite the past a second time, can he? is gaara even the kazekage? is he even still alive--after all, Akatsuki had kidnapped Gaara and killed him--only, Lee doesn't remember that ever happening. In fact, Temari is the Kazekage and Lee has to race to figure out just how different the world is and how he can right what he's wronged. eventually he finds Gaara, who'd abandoned Suna completely and is still just as unstable as before but... there's something there and Lee knows without a shadow of a doubt he can reach Gaara, he just has to be the man he was before his stupid wish. He just has to be the genius of hard work he used to be.

Take my heart, don't lose it or To know you is to love you mhm this one's giving me trouble. these two dont really feel like a connected story, and i think i vibe more with the first one as a title overall.... okay okay going in a completely different direction than what i was expecting. we're gonna go a like dark fairy tale route wit this one and really literalize the title. so like gaara is ya now this royal who's gotta get married to some other royal because politics but he's in love with lee, so he gifts lee his actual heart to keep safe. Lee's probably Gaara's guard so they have their secret lover's meetings and Lee always gives Gaara his heart back for those and then takes it with him when he leaves so gaara can bear being married to someone else. it's awful for lee to watch gaara be married to this other person and to know he's sleeping with her and starting a family and so on, but he still has what matters--Gaara's love. but without his heart Gaara's not the ruler he was before, the ruler he'd promised to be, and there's a plot against Gaara and Lee knows the only way to save him is to return his heart to him permanently but someone has taken Gaara's heart--his wife, because she's jealous and angry that Gaara has never loved her and thinks she can make him love her by holding it. and ultimately Lee has to fight to save Gaara's life, get his heart back, and return it to him so he can lead the kingdom as he wanted, and also be willing to risk their relationship in the process. it'll probably work out in the end but it's me so it'll depend on what makes the most sense but that's my idea for that! and like you could def do a oneshot with the other title. just something sweet and cute with gaara and lee, and falling in love bu i dont feel like i have any real revolutionary ideas for that one

And thinking of someone for whom he still burns or He's haunted by something he cannot define ok first title def feels like a fic about jealousy like gaara being jealous of Lee once having a crush on sakura, maybe he knows they slept together once and has this like horrible, destructive fantasy of how much better off Lee would be with her over him... like Lee and Sakura's hypothetical kids and so on. whereas the second title could be like from Lee's pov and him as an outsider to gaara's internal woes not understanding what it is that's constantly coming between him and Gaara. ultimately feels like two short fics that are left with unresolved tensions between them and a question hanging over them about whether or not they can make this work

I don't care if it hurts me I wanna be worthy or And made sure you never see Any ugly from me this one feels like it could be like a short lil series of snapshots from both lee and gaara's perspective just them like struggling with their respective issues surrounding what it means for them personally to be worthy and ultimately culminating in them being worthy of each others love. simple and straight forward. i def like the first option as a title, a lot but can def see the second one working as like a sequel that's really in conversation with that first fic about worthiness and trying to deny your flaws and keep those parts of you hidden from your partner so like... okay the first fic is like them as individuals trying to be achieve this idea of being worthy and the sequel is like them as a couple trying to be worthy of each other.

[papirouge]

I’m pretty sure Matt Walsh is one of those American conservatives who were a failed entertainer/musician turned to conservative media for a paycheck. Someone posted a video about a girl who used to work for those far right spaces and she would say that these personalities online were failed actors and musicians and went to the right of politics for a check since all they need to do is talk. They don’t believe what they say and will ignore the power of the tongue constantly. It doesn’t matter how hypocritical or backwards the message is. If they say it, they get paid. So I take nothing they say to heart. Walsh and his kind had bashed Halle and the little mermaid remake so much, but when someone decides to make it an Asian girl, Native girl, gay girl or trans (or someone else they don’t like), then they’ll come back to Halle’s Ariel and praise it for being accurate. These type of people I find to be lost souls without a higher purpose no matter how much they praise Christian beliefs. I don’t feel Christ is in their hearts as much as the love of money and power and influence. The things that Satan temped Jesus with in the desert.

Yeah, there's nothing more dangerous than people with failed dreams because they are so bitter and hateful against everyone. I think Ben Shapiro is a failed screenwriter and Candace Owen tried to create an app to signal hate crime when she was still a liberal 💀 oh and let's not forget Andrew Tate and his career as an MMA player (heard he was not bad at it but it was kinda nipped into the bud). Miles Cheong (an infamous Musk bootlicker) was a video game reviews and got splashed by the gamergate scandal. I remember when Musk started beefing against Rockstar game/GTA VI (probably tweaking on ketamine) on xitter, Miles went to his defense saying he never played a GTA game, and he got fact-checked with a community note explaining that since he was a game reviewer, he most likely already played that game 😭💀

And conservatives seething at Ariel being Black over the "she's looking like Ariel" really show they hypocrite selves because when Margot Robbie (who was a perfect barbie lookalike) got casted in Barbie, they still had a problem with that cast because she was too old (which is INSANE because barbie can literally be any age), or ugly (which is peak delusion), etc etc... They will always find excuses....

That being said, I don't think conservatives would have have much a problem with an Asian barbie bc Asians (at least easterners) are still pale, Asians don't have the same history as they do with black Americans so rightoids don't have the same deep seated guilt(?) that breeds that resentment & defensiveness whenever they see black people represented in media. I'll never forget how gamerbro got mad at Jade being Black in the new Mortal Kombat game, but didn't have much of a reject reaction when a significant part of the cast got turned into Asians (Syndel, Raiden, Smoke, etc.).. of course you had idiots asking why ninjas were Asians (???) and how they would rather be "Mediterranean" LMAO As if Mediterranean was an ethnicity (Italians and Egyptians are technically both "Mediterranean" - they still are different ethnicities). But it was a failed attempt to act sleek and not straight up say "I prefer those characters to White" ....a mEdiTeRrAneAn ninja wouldn't still make anysense anyway 💀

And yeah, none of these conservatives are Christians. They are modern day pharisees or zealots. It's not coincidence that Jesus rebuked both of these sides. In the desert, satan tempted Jesus with 3 leverage : materialism/desire of the flesh (asking him to turn stone into bread), greediness (asking him to bow before him to have all the glory in the world), and prideful recklessness (asking him to self harm/throw himself over a cliff arguing nothing will happen to him anyway bc he's the son of God). When you think of everything happening in the world, it HAS to fall in either of those category. Satan keeps using those tricks cause they work.

[redheadsinmybed]

Your Mommy

Chapter one of Loving a little: RE

Alcina Dimitrescu x Fem Reader

Little reader

Description: You aren’t feeling well. What happens when Alcina try’s to make you feel better???

Notes: hey yo :) this is my first story with this pairing, it probably won’t be my last because I absolutely love Alcina and reader together! Anyways I hope you enjoy!!

When you wake up you know something is wrong. You felt weird, maybe it is just an oncoming cold. You roll over and huff when you don’t feel a warm body next to you. Instead of opening your eyes and looking around the room you call out for someone.

“Alci?” You ask in a horse whisper, knowing that the lady of the house was probably around.

Alcina Dimitrescu was and will always be the most beautiful living creature that you’ll ever see. You were abandoned by your own when they found out you were gay. In fact they were so cruel as to tell the whole town. Everyone that you ever knew or trusted abandoned you when you needed them the most.

For your parents it wasn’t a big deal. They were never good parents, they never wanted you either. Their dream child was a male that could provide for the family and have a chance with the princess of the village. Unfortunately they got you: a lesbian. Which wasn’t that bad. You still could’ve had a chance with the princess, if she was secretly gay. They treated you like you weren’t worth the dirt on the bottom of their shoe’s. Your dad was an abusive drunk, and your mom was never around. You know that leaving was the best thing that you could’ve ever done. It lead you to your beautiful Alcina.

When you don’t hear a response you call for her again.

“Alcina?” You say louder this time.

“Yes, love?” You hear the countess say. Your eyes open and you turn your head towards her voice. Your breath never ceases to stop whenever you see her. She’s so damn beautiful, all 9 feet of her. Plus 6 inches with her hat and shoes. You love all of her, the good, the bad, the beautiful, and the ugly.

“Don’t feel good,” You whine. You felt small. Like anything that you would normally do is too hard to do.

“What’s wrong, love?” Alcina says. You whine again.

“You have to use your words baby, otherwise I won’t know how to help you,” Alcina says, coming to sit by you on the bed.

“Feel weird… small,” You say quietly. You scootch over to where Alcina is sitting and crawl up into her lap. You wrap your arms and legs around her waist and rest your head on her chest. You sigh happily her arms wrap around you and her chin rests on her head. You yawn and snuggle closer to her, if that was even possible.

“Close your eyes baby,” Alcina says. Your eyes close and her heartbeat lulls you back to sleep.

When you wake up you are still in your lady's arms. You lift your head up from her chest and look around, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. You spot some objects on the nightstand next to the bed. There was a sage green pacifier and an owl stuffed animal. There was also a sippy cup and a bottle. You stare at the items for a while, feeling drawn to them.

“Baby?” Alcina says. You feel her chest rumble as she talks. When you look up she’s looking down at you with a soft expression.

“What’s all that?” You ask, nodding towards the nightstand.

“Well baby, while you were sleeping I did some research,” Alcina says.

“And it lead you down a rabbit hole for baby stuff?” You ask her. She chuckles softly.

“No baby, I want to try something with you. Only if you want to, but I think it might help you feel better,” Alcina says. You look up at her.

“I trust you, I think I want to try it. What do I need to do?” You ask her. Alcina smiles down at you and grabs the stuffed animal owl.

“Here hold this baby girl,” Alcina says. You went to reach the owl until you heard her call you that. You feel something indescribable and look up at her. During sex Alcina sometimes made you call her “Mommy” and you were refured to as “Baby girl” it honestly lead to one of the fastest orgasms you’ve ever had. But hearing it now, it didn’t feel sexual. It feels safe.

“It’s okay Baby girl, just let go. Mommy will be right here, promise,” Alcina says, you gasp. You stare up into her golden eyes. You felt a pull. It’s getting stronger each time Alcina calls you “Baby girl” and every time she calls herself “Mommy”.

“Baby girl, Mommy needs you to let go for her,” Alcina tries again. You feel the pull take over you. Everything goes blurry for a second. And then, everything is clear, and all that matters is the golden eyes staring into yours.

“Mommy?” You say in a whisper. Alcina gives you a sweet smile hearing you switch.

“There’s my baby girl,” Alcina says. Alcina did some research while you were sleeping. You had introduced the Dimitrescus to technology and taught them how to use google. At first the girls were flabbergasted when you first showed them. But they’ve gotten used to it since then. Alcina had indeed gone down a rabbit hole. From searching “feeling small” to “little space” Alcina had found what might be wrong with you. With lots of research Alcina found out how to make littles switch, which had worked on you. Alcina knew right away that you might be a little from your traumatic past, so she was glad that she got you to switch.

“Hi baby girl,” Alcina says with a smile that lights up the room. You look around the room and wonder where you are. You start to get scared because you can’t remember. Alcina sees the features on your face turn from curious to worried real quick.

“Hey, it’s alright baby girl, look at Mommy,” Alcina says. You look back up to her and the little crease on your forehead disappears.

“Baby, do you know who I am?” Alcina says. You nod as you gaze into those familiar eyes.

“Alci,” You say.

“Very good baby girl. You can call me Mommy, would you like to call me that?” Alcina asks. You nod and try it out a few times.

“M-mommy… Mommy. My- my Mommy?” You say looking up at her with hopeful eyes. Alcina chuckles and brushes away a strand of hair that fell into your face.

“Yes baby girl, your Mommy.”

[bored-bookworm-2005]

I have a bunch of thoughts. I am so tired but sleep is not an option until I put these thoughts somewhere

Spoilers

This is not proof read

~ ok like what the fuck is up with the duffer brothers giving us amazing new characters that have so much potential just to kill them off while giving the main cast plot armor

~ I AM IN NO WAY OF COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW OUR MAIN PEOPLE SURVIVED I THANK ALL THE GODS FOR KEEPING THEM SAFE

~ the whole time Eddie was having his little hero moment I was raging because I’m tired of the characters I love trying to be the hero and then dying

~ Eddie deserves so much better.

~ I am a little (a lot) irritated about all the queerbating (is that the proper term for this) im not sure if I’m being over dramatic and making issues out of something that’s not actually a problem but I’m bummed that they hyped up Byler and made Steddie and Ronance so like there and then did nothing with it

~ I was stressing my actual balls off worrying about Steve. Like I was so scared I had to watch the end of the last episode to make sure he was still there (in the process I spoiled Eddie’s death :/)

~ the deaths weren’t giving. The way the duffer brothers and co talked about the deaths coming I expected everyone to die like I was imagining all our favorite characters dropping like flies. Instead a bunch of not exactly liked or well treasured characters died. And the two main important major deaths that happened either a) was unnecessary imo and the was ignored by all but one of the main characters or b) backed out of and brought the character sorta back

~ Steve looked so good in these episodes. Like everyone did but Steve was giving off that mom energy and I was dying and when he was talking about his little nuggets and exploring the country I wanted to like die because that was so cute. It made me particularly happy because I’m like in love with Steve and I’ve always wanted a bunch of kids

~ but can we address how the reason Steve probably wants a bunch of kids is because he has felt so alone his whole life he doesn’t wanna keep feeling like that so he wants to have a big warm happy family

~ the stancy stuff was killing me and not in a good way

~ we finally got some relief for our lack of Jopper

~ I really wish we got more in that Will and Jonathan scene like I genuinely thought he was gonna come out but didn’t flat out happen. I think the duffer brothers and co are allergic to having males (will in particular) admit to being gay

~ max my baby. I was crying when Lucas was holding her and crying and she was like I can’t see or feel anything im scared I don’t wanna die. I thought it was going to cause me to die from heartbreak

~ I really thought Karen Wheeler was gonna have a bigger part in volume 2 and im bummed she didn’t

~ I was getting so mad whenever Jason was on screen. I thought he was gonna be a decent character but this man is crazy and I get where he is coming from but the fact that he was set on the fact that Eddie was guilty and refused to even consider anything else made me mad

~ vecna touching the girls with his ugly slimy hands also made me mad

- #elmax

~ Nancy with that gun oml

~ Steve driving oml

[limv3000]

I don’t know about y’all but I don’t exactly get Naruto and Hinata, Sasuke and Sakura’s relationship.

Naruto realized his feelings for Hinata in one movie. Literally after a whole goddamn show was about him chasing his ‘best friend’ and being willing to die for him. Yeah, Naruto cares about hinata and would risk his life for her too, but then again he would do that for anyone. If Hinata had left in OG Naruto, he would probably chase after her but for the sakes of Kiba and Shino. If y’all remember that time when he had to make Kurenai come back and be their Sensei, that’s the type of thing he would do with Hinata (in my opinion).

Even though Naruto had made a promise to get back Sasuke for Sakura, when she had called it off and told him to stop chasing, he still went for it, because he loves him. ALSO, let’s not forget when he literally had a mf heart attack because everyone was giving up on Sasuke. Naruto literally ignored and pushed away everyone just so he can get sasuke. He calls Sasuke his bestie and then forgets about Shikamaru, Choji like, even that annoys me. Shikamaru has literally never judged Naruto, ever. For Sasuke though it’s a different story.

I don’t think Naruto is gay for Sasuke, but Sasuke is gay for Naruto. Obviously I think Naruto loves Sasuke more that just a best friend though. Sasuke calls Naruto his first real friend, and I get that. After Itachi killed his clan, Sasuke was alone and Naruto was the only one who noticed it. In OG Naruto, Sakura had a crush on Sasuke because he was cool, smart, and handsome. She never actually knew who Sasuke was, or what happened. She literally was talking shit about an orphan in front of an orphan. No one does that. Sasuke has never even acknowledged any girls, only Naruto. He’s risked his life and goal for Naruto, he could’ve died knowing that he never got revenge, all for Naruto’s dumbass

I also don’t think Naruto ever had any true feelings for Sakura and was only jealous of Sasuke for getting so much attention. He was also yearning for attention and for someone to acknowledge him, and yeah after Sasuke had left Naruto still was asking Sakura in dates but I just think he simply got used to it. He sacrificed a lot for Sakura, and all for her to ignore and turn him down. Don’t get me wrong Sakura is an ok character, just not some of her choices and behaviors through out the show. Mf literally, accidentally called her ugly.

Now I’ve heard people say “Sasuke tried killing Naruto so many times though”…… it’s like they forgot that he’s tried killing Sakura, Kakashi, Karin, and the whole mf village. He tried killing Naruto because his bro Itachi said that it was necessary for him to gain the Mangekyo Sharingan, and apparently that was the only way to beat Itachi and kill him. He tried killing Sakura because she was in the way, and that she was ‘annoying’. He tried killing the Village because he wanted to avenge Itachi and yeah at that moment, Naruto was in the way and he was blinded by the fact he needed to avenge his clan and brother

People act like Sakura was the one who brought him back and knocked some mf sense into him, no she didn’t. Literally when Naruto and Sasuke had fought he seen Naruto, his memories, and everything about him. Sasuke had seen that Naruto has always had Sasuke in his heart, and he felt bad. He realized why Naruto did everything he did and why Sasuke meant so much to him, he cried when he realized that Naruto was actually a good friend and who were the only people to make Sasuke cry? Itachi and Naruto. Who was the most important person to Sasuke? Itachi. Who reminded Sasuke of Itachi? Naruto.

There’s is just so much things that don’t makes sense. Like, I honestly think they should’ve been together in the end. I think that they didn’t make Naruto like that is because

1) they wanted Boruto

2) fans would be angry and Naruto wouldn’t have been as popular

3) hate.

I honestly think that Hinata and Kiba would have been a great couple. They’ve had more chemistry, moments, and time together than Hinata and Naruto. I honestly don’t know what’s to say about Sasuke and Sakura, like what? He just came back and decided to love Sakura and have a kid? I think the only reason that SasSaku is cannon is because Sasuke wanted to revive the Uchiha clan. What other reason to love Sakura? I fr think that she should’ve at least have Rock-lee a chance. He was a gentleman and is always willing to protect Sakura. Also Neji shouldn’t have died, but that conversations for another time.

I think you all should share your opinions on this, and tell me what you think.

THIS IS NOT A NaruHina AND SasuSaku HATE POST

[whaleofatjme1920]

Take two of asking for some gay panic with the ladies, any ladies, all the ladies! Scenario preferably~

Afternoons in the Proxy Commons and Spirit Halloween

[Jane the Killer, Nina the Killer, Clockwork, Kate the Chaser X F!Reader]

[Warnings: none]

[AN: I really want to go to a Spirit Halloween, sigh]

It’s not often that you’re able to spend time in Slender manor. In fact, the place isn’t even really your domain to begin with. You come here every now and then to help with festivities the Slender Man deems necessary for “morale”. This upcoming festivity? Halloween.

Your pseudo boss, the Slender Man, told you to head to the store and get some decorations which was ludacris in itself. He’s an almighty, powerful being and he needs you to go to Spirit Halloween when he hosts a manor full of murderers from all over the country daily?

The answer is apparently yes.

“You may take the ladies with you,” The Slender Man waves off. “They are not doing anything this afternoon.”

You drop your shoulders, knowing that it’s useless to even consider going against his word. “And we’re going to pay for this with what?”

The Slender Man makes noise of amusement before one of his long tendrils opens up a drawer to his left, opening it and producing a - a credit card? He hums quietly and lowers it down to you, depositing the plastic into your hands.

���A debit card? Really?”

“Is that a problem?”

“Where did you even get this?”

“None of your concern.” The Slender Man’s tendril finds its way to your back before turning you towards his office door, pushing you towards it. “The ladies are in the proxy commons.”

You glance over your shoulder at him before nodding, a slight grin on your lips at his general annoyance of you before pushing the big doors open. You mentally begin to think over the way to the proxy commons, the mansion bending its hallways to your destination. The halls here always smell of jasmine.

When you reopen your eyes after zoning out for a moment or two, you realize that you’re standing in front of the arch of the proxy commons. It’s actually relatively empty save for a table full of ladies you’ve only ever met a handful of times. You take in a small breath, almost hyping yourself and your confidence up before stepping in. Soft rays of sunlight pass over your skin as you walk into the well lit room and listen to the gentle hum of passing conversation.

There, sitting at a round table are four of the most influential women in your society. Jane the Killer, beauty in black. Clockwork, timeless in every sense. Kate the Chaser, a subtle treasure. Nina the Killer, devotion like none other.

They’re smiling and laughing, enjoying the afternoon with each other when Nina finally pipes up and notices you. Her eyes widen for a moment before her lips curl up into a beaming smile. “Oh, you’re finally here!” She exclaimed, hopping out of her seat. “He told us to expect you.”

Nina’s hands are cold as she wraps her arms around you, but you welcome her touch all the same. “He did?”

Kate nods, a small hum coming from her throat as she sips at her tea. “Mhm. Already got a car waiting in Rosswood’s parking lot.”

“Ready to go when you are,” Natalie pipes in as she drinks the rest of her beverage.

“Might as well uh, leave now,” you say as you catch Jane’s warm smile, voice faltering for just a moment.

The ladies nod and begin to get up, Nina linking her arm with yours before she begins to drag you towards the mansion’s entrance.

-

-

-

“He couldn’t just use his infinite power and use his own halloween decorations?” Natalie says as she shoves her hands in her pockets, looking up at the reasonably crowded Spirit Halloween.

Kate shrugs and locks the car before plopping the keys into her hoodie’s pocket. “He likes to keep us on our toes, I guess,” she chuckles, nodding for the group to follow her.

Jane matches pace with you and Nina (who has refused to unlink arms with you the entire time she’s been in your presence), before resting her head on your shoulder. “I wanna check out the costumes,” she says, nuzzling into you.

You smile and nuzzle her back, softly melting into her touch as you do so. “Me too.”

“I want to see the decorations,” Nina beams. “I’m thinking we go full Halloween party this year, screw the upper class!” She exclaims, now dragging you and Jane at full speed.

The notion brings a laugh from Natalie as she opens the front door, letting everyone else inside before her. “Don’t get too carried away,” she says. “We’re here to Reader can to a job,” she grins.

“It’s not like we have to make it boring,” Nina pouts.

“I’d also love to see what costumes Reader looks best in,” Jane muses. “Maybe a little bunny?” She jokes, index finger tapping your nose and making you giggle as you scrunch your nose up in response.

“What about a kitty?” Kate suggests as she glances down one of the aisles. “I think that would be purr-fect for her.” Kate grins slightly and holds her hand out to you, watching as you unlink your arm from Nina’s to travel down to the lawn decorations.

You chuckle as Kate warmly holds you while glancing at all the lawn decorations. There’s clowns, slashers, things that you’d genuinely love to have on Slender Man’s front lawn! However, you know that he’d be put off by the “tackiness”.

You turn your head to the side and that’s when you see it - a giant, poorly made Slender Man that wiggles its arms and barely lunges at whoever is viewing it. “Oh my gods,” you say, suddenly letting go of Kate’s hand and stalking towards the ungodly thing like a moth to moonlight.

Kate raises a brow and looks over her shoulder to finally see what you’re looking at, and a laugh escapes her throat. “Oh my gods, guys, look-” she says as she begins to walk over and join you, hands in her pockets.

Natalie, who had been busy talking shit at the poor Pennywise animatronic, was suddenly pulled over by Jane to see the Slender Man reject. She grins and links arms with Jane and Nina, laughter escaping their lips as the thing lunges weakly at you. “He’s so ugly,” she snorts.

“He’s always ugly,” Nina giggles as she looks upwards at the tall prop.

“Yeah,” Natalie adds on, “how dare he exist in the same space as Reader, right?”

Laughter rings out from the group as their eyes slowly move over to you.

“Beauty and the Beast situation,” Kate continues as she slings her arm over your shoulders.

“She’s gotta kiss him to make him pretty?” Nina chuckles as she pokes the animatronic’s spindly arms. “Ooooo, maybe if Reader kissed me I’d become pretty?”

You make a sound of surprise and feel heat rush to your cheeks. “What? You’re already pretty!”

“Think I might need a kiss too,” Natalie hums.

“Same here,” Jane grins.

Kate hums and presses her lips to the crown of your head. “Me too.” You laugh and shake your head before reaching into your back pocket for the list of things you need. “Ladies, we’re here on a mission!” You exclaim in a slightly flustered tone.

“We know,” Jane hums, her fingers gently playing with your loose strands of hair. “But how often do we get to hang out with you?”

“Right,” Natalie nods. “Might as well have some fun with it,” she teases in a joking tone, her hand grabbing yours.

You watch with wide eyes as the clock eyed woman raises it to her lips, gently planting a kiss on the back of it. Heat erupts over your face once more. Your heart is thumping wildly in your chest.

Nina pouts. “No fair!” She stomps her boot onto the linoleum tile. “I was gonna do that to Reader!”

Kate laughs and sways you in her arms. “Reader does have another hand.”

You sigh playfully and relent, watching as the clad in purple woman bounds up to you.

Gonna be a busy shopping trip, huh?

[mooooooosicals]

Bad summaries of Hatchetfield songs:

TGWDLM:

The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals: here comes the... well I wouldn't call him a boy. More like six foot tall office lad.

La Dee Da Da Day: musical townspeople do what musical townspeople do... harass the protagonist

What Do You Want Paul?: the number that you don't want to get stuck in your head during sex

Cup of Roasted Coffee: convincing braindead customers to buy shitty coffee with hips and harmonies

Cup of Poison Coffee: oh. oh they're evil now. ok. cool.

Show Me Your Hands: the acab song. it should have been a tap number, fuck you.

You Tied Up My Heart: kinky shit in the basement.

Join Us And Die: ma'am I appreciate the c#5 but this is a Wendy's

Not Your Seed: Alice has an appetite for nachos. And shooting her father dead.

Show Stopping Number: old man does what old men do best, tie up their former students in their basement and shake ass

America Is Great Again: I dare you to show this to That One Family Member. I dare you.

Let Him Come: I'm thoroughly disappointed with the lack of jokes in the fandom here. Missed opportunity.

Let It Out: dance, funky office man, dance

Inevitable: well shit, that's depressing. cool lighting, tho.

BLACK FRIDAY:

Wiggly Jiggle: capitalism, but make it cute and a little bit unsettling

What Tim Wants: thank you, Tom, very nice vocals. But sir I just met you I really don't give a shit.

CaliforM.I.A.: admit it, the best part of this song is Hannah dancing in the background

What Do You Say?: high school reunion but with more 🎵spice🎵. And choreographed thrusting, for some reason.

Our Doors Are Open: capitalism with a bouncy time signature

Feast or Famine: February 2020: the song

Monsters and Men: Johnny Mac n Cheese my beloved... and uh... who are these guys again? Sorry I got distracted by the fact that mac n cheese man is back.

Deck The Halls: pov: you're watching Black Friday for the first time and have not a damn clue what's going on. Wait Santa's a pedophi-

Take Me Back: oh look, the traumatized couple sings! And... fucks-

Adore Me: MILF becomes a murderous MILF, even better

Do You Want To Play?: Other fandoms took one look at this song and said "fReE rEaL eStAtE"

Made In America: really good song for a really unnecessary plotline

Black Friday: teenager sings while being choked. That. That makes no sense.

Monsters and Men (reprise): so now they have powers all of a sudden? Did I miss something??

If I Fail You: again, Tom, pretty vocals, I don't give a shit

Wiggle: townspeople shake ass and moan for an ugly ass kids toy

What If Tomorrow Comes?: the child sings and then goes boom. we think. we're not sure.

NIGHTMARE TIME SEASON 1

Nightmare Time Theme: everyone is evil now, I guess

The Hatchetfield Ape-Man: ya like jazz?

The Blinky Song: Blinky is a shitty boss and the Sniggles need to unionize

Snoozle Town: I feel like we've heard this song before-

With A Thousand Eyes: TTO is in the HFU?!?!

Forever And Always: oh my god we're so in love uwu owo 🥺🥺

Time Bastard: woman. Pretty woman. Pretty woman singing.

Peanuts!: this song is probably therapy after that mindfuck of an episode.

Jane's A Car: we should make this song a Rick Roll in the fandom. How can you even take a song about a sad man wanting to fuck his car seriously anyway?

The Witch In The Web: little girl plays a ukelele but like. with magic.

The Web I Spin For You: spider lady sings and makes me gay

[skeetusmcyeetus]

I’ve making headcanons about all of my hyper fixations for a while now and just dumping them on my friends so I’m gonna also dump them here.

If you’re into All For the Game , My Hero Academia, ATLA, The Raven Cycle stay fuckn tuned my doods bc I have a loooot of stuff rattling around my empty skull.

Not all of these are 100% mine some of them are already pretty popular and I’m expanding on them or I heard something similar and edited it to my own tastes

I’ll separate them by series,,,

Theres like one canon that’s mildly nsfw

TW: drug abuse

Mha/Bnha

pro hero kirishima’s Red Riot™️ merch is insanely size inclusive bc he wants fatgum to be able to wear the hoodie that kiri’s pr team sent him but that’s not all,,

If he wasn’t super gay and in love with Bakugou he’d be very Into BBWs so again his merch is super size inclusive bc he wants everyone to be able to wear it

The company that makes the merch also takes requests for special made merch for people who’s quirks interfere with a “normal” size or dimension

ALSO ,,,,this man(kiri) is built like a fuckn MACK TRUCK OKAY he is 6’7” and cannot fit through doorways without ducking and turning a little to the side ,,, he is broad And still wears no shirt™️ ,,, this being said ,, bakugou is still around 5’8” and pretty slim don’t get me wrong he’s extremely strong and toned but he’s not huge,, it makes flying easier if he stays a little lighter ,,,,,,, the point is,, sometimes kiri will pick up bakugou with one arm and bakugou can’t even pretend to hate it anymore

Also,,,, fatgum has to use special pens and keyboards because of how big his hands are,,, he’s literally 8’2” I won’t take criticism on this

Fatgum actually loves wearing red riot and sun eater merch

Allmight and Inko start dating and one day when they’re out someone comments on how much all might “looks like a skeleton” and she absolutley lets loose on them for being so vapid and shallow and how “he’s risked his life to save people like you more times than you have ever even thought about being helpful in your life and it would serve you well to treat someone who’d die for you without even knowing you with more respect”

All might had to gently pull her away bc the guy was crying and she wasn’t anywhere near finished with him

Midnight is Asexual and aggressively pretends to be horny on main™️ because for one, it works with her quirk and two, nothing sells better than sex especially when you’re a woman.

Bakugou and kirishima use sign language to talk shit at Public events

Dabi is addicted to painkillers because he’s been on them his entire life,, he wakes up with the shakes and sometimes toga has to help him take his meds in the morning because he’s already in withdrawal

Tensei was the first one to realize that iida was autistic and immediately did copious amounts of research on ASD and how to be a good brother to him

ATLA

sokka grows his hair as long as Zuko’s (except the sides obvi) and sometimes he’ll wear his hair in the fire nation top knot and zuko loses it every time

Azula gets help and now sometimes when she wakes up with the sun after a night of fitful sleep she goes to the courtyard to have tea with iroh. They never talk, but then again they never need to.

Sometimes after a hard day sokka falls asleep in the bathtub and wakes up to zuko warming the water back up and washing his hair for him

Suki lounges in zukos throne while zuko gets worked up about stuff and paces all around the room

Mai is on the ace spectrum

When sokka and zuko visit the southern water tribe zuko will firebend for the all of the kids in the village,,, they love him so much and sometimes sokka gets a little teary eyed watching him

Sokka braids zukos hair water tribe style and it’s the hottest thing maybe ever

Zuko takes sokka on shopping sprees pretty frequently and sokka fuckn loves it

One time someone has the nerve to call sokka “the fire lords sugar baby” and sokka just flips his ponytail over his shoulder Ariana style and says “and what about it?”

The Raven cycle

Ronan has 100% killed Robert Parrish in his dreams and when he wakes up to see Adam next to him he almost immediately wants to go back to sleep and do it again for all the pain he’s caused Adam

Gansey is oblivious to the fact that he is indeed shredded,, when he gets really worked up he moves his arms a l o t like rolls up his sleeves, crosses and uncrosses his arms and The gang’s favorite is when he puts his hands on his head and subconsciously flexes,,,, literally entire gangsey will group swoon at him and he genuinely thinks they are marvelling at his passion for whatever he’s worked up about

Ronan watched broke back mountain once when he was like 16 and now all he can think about is being a gay cowboy ,,,

Adam will read people’s tarot wrong if theyre douchebags

Don’t you think it’s funny that the ganseys don’t have any straight children?

Blue has a T-shirt from each member of the gangsey (except Noah,, rip Noah) and shes created a terrible Franken-T-shirt by ripping them up and sewing them all back together in an extremely ugly patch work thing

Adam talks in Latin in his sleep and it really freaks his roommate out,, like a lot,, not to mention the fact that Adam already creeps him out to begin with bc he’s got that other vibe that comes from being tied to cabeswater and lindenmere ,, 6 out of 7 days his roommate is convinced that he’s a witch or a fairy or something

Ronan teaches opal how to bake and opal burns everything on purpose

aftg

Neil has definitely killed multiple people to survive

Neil’s mom definitely made him kill someone at least twice to make sure he could kill to survive on his own if they got separated

he probably definitely still has nightmares about each one

Matt and Dan both had a crush on Neil for like 30 seconds and absolutely talked to each other about him

Ppl always talk about how hot it is to crush a watermelon with your thighs,,,, Andrew could do it with his arms

Aarons ass is so flat and Andrew has an absolute dumptruck

Kevin started out as one of those annoying “obsessed with WWII” history guys and now he’s actually very into queer history and will rant about the lavender scare for an hour if you let him

The foxes lounge room(?) has a dart board with riko’s face on it to this day,, they literally have a drawer full of copies the same image of riko and every time one gets worn out they put a new one up. It’s more of an inside joke now but wymack still hates that little puke even though he’s dead so it stays up

Post-canon Neil gets drunk and teaches the team how to steal a car by hot wiring Matt’s truck

Matt does drag for halloween one year and Dan liked it a little too much *cough cough* she pegged him while he was still in drag

Someone once asked Renee if she was “saving herself for marriage like a good Christian girl should” and Allison knocked them out cold and stepped over the body

Neil calls Aaron ugly to his face literally any chance he gets (I feel like this one might be canon but I actually don’t know What’s real anymore)

Andrew Unironically wears a pink apron that says “kiss the cook” that Nicky got him for Christmas when he bakes

Okay I think that’s it ? For now?? Let me know if y’all want more,,,,, I’ll separate them next time I just really had to dump these and I didn’t want to make multiple posts.

I made this at 5:30 in the morning sorry if it’s riddled with typos and errors.

[broken-stardust]

Maybe Hotch Was Right

Summary: Spencer and Reader don't get along, but things change when Spencer finds him during a personal moment.

Category: Angst/Fluff SpencerxMale!Reader

Content Warnings: homophobia, cursing, kissing, crying

Word Count: 1.4k

A/N: This was written for @imagining-in-the-margins's August Enemies to Lovers challenge, and I didn't procrastinate till the end of the month! Look at me go!! Anyway, I hope you enjoy my gay writing.

Y/N was the most insufferable person I knew. He was full of himself, he thought he knew better than anybody else, and he always had to be right. It infuriated me. It wasn't that he wasn't smart; he was. Incredibly smart, in fact. It was just that he had to make sure everyone knew it, and he'd rub it into people's faces all the time.

It didn't help that he was cute, too. If he'd been ugly, it would have made it so much easier to hate him. But he had these eyes that just drew me in. And that smile! Oh my god, that smile. If only he wasn't such an asshole.

He was nice enough, I supposed, just an arrogant prick. But everybody else liked him, and that just made my hatred for him that much worse. Why couldn't anyone see what he was doing? He was playing them all like a fiddle, but I wasn't falling for it. I knew that underneath that grin, he was just a self-consumed smartass.

He had been a thorn in my side throughout this entire case, too. Hotch kept pairing us up in hopes that we'd realize that our feud was uncalled for, but Y/N was just as stubborn as I was, if not more. The last straw had been when Hotch assigned us to the same hotel room.

"But Hotch," I whined, praying he'd have mercy on me and let me stay with Derek instead. "I won't be-"

He cut me off with a hand raised to my face.

"This isn't up for discussion, Reid," he warned. "You are sharing a room with Y/L/N, and if I need to, I won't let you out until you make up over whatever this stupid argument is about."

I rolled my eyes. Was he really treating me like a child right now? Still, I knew arguing would get me nowhere.

"Yes, Sir," I said in defeat before heading in the direction of my room.

Y/N was already in there, and I dreaded having to enter. With all the courage I could muster up, I opened the door and stepped inside.

It was dark except for the faint light coming in through the window, and I heard some sort of noise. A sniffle maybe? Was he... crying?

As the door closed behind me, I heard him scramble to hide whatever it was that he was doing. I mentally cursed myself for intruding on such a personal moment, even if I did hate the guy's guts.

"Are you, um, are you okay?" I finally asked after ages of silence.

I heard another sniffle come from his direction.

"Why would you care?" Y/N spat.

I approached slowly.

"Well, you're crying and-"

"Oh so now that I'm crying you suddenly care about me?" I stepped back again. "You don't have to pretend to give a shit just because I'm upset. You hate me, and I hate you. Let's just keep it that way."

I took a deep breath and resolved to sit on my bed, facing away from him. If he was going to be like that, I didn't want to deal with him. I closed my eyes and started going over the Fibonacci Sequence in my head to pass time.

"My parents found out that I'm gay," I heard his sudden, soft voice say through a sniffle.

My heart softened just a little bit at the words. I knew how hard it was to come out, how painful it was to get rejected. Even more so when you were forced out of the closet instead of coming out of your own free will.

"It didn't go well, then," I whispered. It was more to myself than to him, but he heard it anyway.

"What gave you that idea, Einstein?" he said bitterly. I could hear the hurt in his voice.

"I'm sorry. What did they say?"

"Why should I tell you?"

I sighed and got up off of my bed to go over to his and sit next to him. With the little bit of light that was in the room, I could faintly see Y/N's face. His eyes were red and puffy, and his cheeks were stained from tears. I wondered how long he'd been crying.

"I'm trying to help," I told him. "Talk to me."

I could see him contemplate opening up to me. Eventually, he wiped his eyes with shaky hands and looked down while picking at his nails.

"They said that I'm disgusting and that I'm going to Hell," Y/N admitted. My heart broke at the words.

"How'd they find out?" I asked gently.

"I was texting with my sister about a guy I like and she accidentally texted my parents instead of me. They figured it out from there."

A single tear rolled down his cheek. I fought the urge to wipe it from his face.

"I'm so sorry," I murmured. "How can I help you feel better?"

Y/N shrugged. He looked so defeated, I felt bad about the way I'd treated him throughout the case.

"What about this guy?" I asked. "Maybe you want to tell me about him?"

"I'd rather not," Y/N said as he cleared his throat. I noticed him visibly stiffen. After a moment of silence, he spoke again. "I know I act like a dick." I kept my mouth shut. "I have to be the smartest person in the room, and I have to do everything right."

I let out a short laugh as he admitted what we'd both known all along. This must have been his way of apologizing, so I let him continue.

"But that's not really me," Y/N admitted quietly. "I'm so insecure. I feel like I need to prove myself to everyone because, well, my whole life I've been fed the narrative that I should be ashamed of who I am. I guess I try to overcompensate."

I hesitantly reached over and put a hand on his shoulder. This man that I'd hated for so long was baring his soul to me, and I felt like I didn't deserve it.

"I'm so sorry," I repeated for the umpteenth time. "I didn't know. If I did, I wouldn't have been so rude to you." Then, I decided to take a chance. "So about that guy..."

Y/N shifted away from me uncomfortably.

"I kind of like a guy too," I whispered, slightly hoping he wouldn't hear me. "If that makes you feel any better."

In the pale moonlight, I could see his eyes grow wider. He turned to me with a shocked expression, and I couldn't help but laugh.

"But-" he cut himself off before he could say anything stupid. I shot him a sheepish grin. A wave of understanding washed over him, and he smiled slightly. "Can I..."

Instead of giving him a verbal answer, I leaned in and planted a soft kiss on his lips. I started to pull away, but his hands caught my face and pulled me back in. I sighed into the kiss, and Y/N smiled. He tasted like mint and strawberries. I didn't want the moment to end.

But of course, nothing lasts forever. Once we separated, Y/N began to cry again. This time, it was a strong, shaking cry that overtook his whole body. Panic set in as I wondered if I shouldn't have done that. I pulled Y/N close and rocked him back and forth with me while playing with his hair and whispering words of affirmation to him.

"What's wrong?" I asked, afraid of what the answer might be. I desperately didn't want him to think our kiss was a mistake.

"We just... we've been fighting this whole time," he said between sobs. "We both knew. Don't lie, I know you knew it too. And yet, we spent this whole time fighting."

"It's okay," I assured him. "We can't take back the past, but we can change the future."

I planted another soft kiss on his cheek and guided him to lay down in his bed. Once he was situated under the covers, I crawled into the bed next to him. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer.

"I love you," he choked out into my chest.

"I love you, too," I told him and pulled him even closer. "We'll get you through this. I promise."

Y/N nodded and cried until he was all tired out. We held each other tightly as we both drifted off to sleep, unsure of what may lay ahead. As I shut my eyes, I thought to myself, maybe Hotch was right.