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sofoulandfairaday · 4 years ago

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The ultimate How I Met Your Mother Finale rant

I know this has been done before, and I know I'm several years late to the party, but I don't care, so IN THIS ESSAY I WILL tell you about why this finale takes the spot as the second-worst finale in TV show history (because Game of Thrones is still, to this day, unbeatable, and it will probably stay like that forever).

But first, a little context: I've just finished binge-watching HIMYM. This binge has been going on for three days straight (my final exam of the semester is in a week and I should be studying, so the fact that the last few days were a partial waste of time makes me so mad). Second thing: I already knew how it would end, and yes, kids, it does ruin the show for you. It ruins the show so much it makes your blood boil when you rewatch certain scenes, but I will get to that.

You might want to make yourself a drink because this is a complete list of all the reasons why HIMYM's finale sucks - I'm warning you, it's gonna be looong.

It completely invalidates the entirety of season 9

This is one of the complaints people most often have with this series, and I have to agree. It would have been so much better if the last two episodes never existed, and they just showed Barney and Robin dancing at the reception after walking out of the chapel, Ted noticing Tracy and then the platform scene. "And that, kids, is the story of how I met your mother". Cut scene. Honestly, I don't get the hate people give to season 9, barring the last 2/3 episodes, especially since season 8 was so much worse (except for a few honourable mentions, like The Robin). S8 was slower, less funny, and less deep, and while the authors took a risk by making s9 happen in the span of a weekend it paid off: they took their time introducing the character of the Mother to the gang and fleshing her out. They make sure to highlight all the little ways in which Ted and Tracy are perfect for each other, and even tie up loose ends, like with the Slapsgiving episode, that was a filler but it wasn't boring to watch (although it may be problematic for different reasons, I'm not Chinese, so I can't say for sure if it's cultural appropriation or just the authors making fun of a particular movie genre).

Some episodes were arguably great: "Daisy" was amazing, and that whole fight between Marshall and Lily was so realistic and well thought out, "Sunrise" was extremely important for Ted's character development, same goes for Tracy and "How Your Mother Met Me", "Bedtime stories" was impressive, "Rally" was incredibly funny and proved once again what a beautiful character Barney Stinson is, so much so that even Robin never has doubts that he (the guy with the biggest commitment issues on the planet) will bail on her before the wedding, and says to Ted that "he always comes back". Daphne's character is super funny and the right amount of annoying, the shenanigans of the gang are well thought out and all of the characters (not just Barney) complete their arc in this season. The last two/three episodes butcher that.

Marshall and Lily

Marshall and Lily, arguably the world's most solid couple, are the only thing this God-awful finale gets right, especially Marshall, who is my second-favourite character, that finally gets everything he deserves. But what about Lily? They never mention her career after Italy, and I refuse to believe she goes back to being a kindergarten teacher as if her year in Rome meant nothing. I also refuse to think she becomes nothing but a political wife, the equivalent of Zoey, but without saving the world. We know she has three kids, but her postpartum depression is never really talked about much and they definitely had the screentime to delve into it.

Barney

Where do I even begin? Barney Stinson is, without a doubt, the best character in this series, the glue of the whole gang. I think the message they were trying to give is that, since his trauma stemmed from the absence of a father figure in his life, he could only truly heal by becoming a father as well. People also say that n°31 had to stay just a number, because who could match up with Barney Stinson? First of all, I call BULSHIT on that last point, because Robin wasn't the only girl Barney could have ended up marrying. I used to think that too, but it's just not true: that is the equivalent of saying that Barney was incapable to truly love a woman and commit to her, even after all the development he got, and that he only got one shot at love in life, and that's it. This goes against the point the showrunners try to make by having Ted and Robin end up together AND by having Tracy get with Ted in the first place: "it's never too late, you always have another chance at love, etc." And, let's face it, Barney and Robin are legendary, but Barney and Nora (hell, even Barney and Quinn!) were pretty good together too.

Second of all, if they wanted to give Barney a kid, they could have easily done that, before Barney married Robin. Barney's "redemption" starts when he gets with Robin the first time, hell maybe even when we meet James for the first time: Nora, Quinn, finding out who his father is, the episode dedicated to the lies his mum told him/finding James' father, him getting to know his own dad, etc... those are all steps along the way. The s9 episode where Barney accepts the relationship between Loretta and the reverend proves how far he's come. So why not give him a daughter BEFORE he proposes to Robin? Have him cheat on Nora/Quinn with n°31, giving him a relapse, and having him get closer to Robin while struggling to be a dad to Ellie. That would have been great.

Or, you know, don't give him children. What's the point of burning the Playbook if you're going to have him write the second edition? What's the point of having him do a complete 180 in the last few scenes and acting like having a kid is the only thing that makes him change? What's the point of doing that when the show spends entire episodes berating Marshall and Lily for "changing too much" when they have a kid?

Also, Barney is the "challenge accepted" guy. He loves his wife so much, he spent years wanting her, and then he gives up because there is no WiFi in his hotel. How does that make any sense at all? This is Barney Stinson, the "I will fly out to San Francisco and buy Lily a plane ticket", the "I will steal every girl from my best friend just to save him for Lily", the guy that wrote the Playbook (it takes effort to pull those plays off), the guy that planned for weeks his proposal, the guy that waited years to get back at the man who stole his first girlfriend, the guy that makes every night legendary... are you telling me that that guy becomes the equivalent of a bored housewife instead of living his best life while travelling the world? Come on. They don't even try to make it believable.

Ted

While watching seasons 7 and 8, I felt that Ted was becoming the worst character on the show: he was boring, depressed, basically had no good storylines, the whole thing with Victoria was pointless and inconclusive (and the whole "stop being in love with Robin" was completely out of character for her), but whatever, we could have accepted that because it passed the message that two people could be good together, without being soulmates - which, by the way, renders the TedxRobin ship pointless, because they were right for each other, but Ted and Tracy were soulmates. Him being hung up on Robin in the latter seasons is almost pathetic, and the thing he does with the locket is insane, not romantic - BUT I will say this: it can be seen in two ways, depending on who's watching. I personally like the two as friends, so I see the whole thing as a "Dahmer" situation, but I get the people who see it as a "Dobler" one and see what he did as a grand romantic gesture.

The problem, though, is that the whole TedxRobin ship gets pretty old, pretty fast: it's an annoying on-and-off thing, that should have ended with the locket. Because, yes, Ted was in a dark moment, yes, he was probably depressed, yes, he thought Robin was his only shot at happiness, but he changes during season nine! He spends entire episodes letting go of Robin, including the one where she transforms into a balloon and flies away. Ted is the good guy, ultimately. He is the guy that is genuinely happy for his best friends. In one of the deleted scenes from the finale, he meets Robin years later and says that he's so happy with Tracy he never thought about Robin in that way anymore. All of that gets thrown in the trash. Why do that? To use a Harry Potter metaphor, Ted is Severus Snape, while Barney is James Potter: the former loved the girl of his dreams with all his heart, even to the point of creepiness, but they weren't meant to be together.

Robin

This, along with the next point, is the worst of all: Robin is the worst character of the entire finale. Her relationship with Ted in season 2 is wonderful, and I say that as a full-on Barney/Robin shipper. There was never a problem in their relationship, apparently, but they then break up because they have an "expiration date" and ultimately want different things in life. Except that Ted is not her soulmate. The only times when Robin wants Ted are the times where (1) she can't have him because he's either trying to move on or (2) the times where it's convenient, for example when they become roommates again and they solve their disputes again. Around that time, we see perfectly that Ted had moved on and that the person getting hurt was Barney. It's one thing to see Ted and Robin in the finale as two people picking up where they had left off after they dated. But this is not the case.

In season 7, we have the exchange that should have put an end to any and all TedxRobin drama, and that completely invalidates whatever the writers wrote after that about the two of them: Ted declares his love - "I think you know how you feel about me now. I don't think time's gonna change that. Just tell me: do you love me?" To which she answers "No". And Ted also says later to Marshall, that he's "happy because he can finally move on".

What a load of crap.

Getting over someone is hard, believe me, I would know. And, oftentimes, it doesn't happen until we find someone else to love (and from the moment he meets Tracy, there is no one else for Ted). But by giving Ted feelings for Robin after this moment, it takes away from the beauty of it- because it's one of the most heartbreaking feelings in the world when you declare your love to someone and they don't love you back. Ted and Robin were both honest at that moment, and it was the last genuinely good exchange between them. After that, during season 8 they try to show us Ted trying to get over her (and failing) and in season 9 Ted getting over her completely. This is also weirdly paced because at the beginning of s8 both are in happy relationships with other people and there's no jealousy (which is good, because at least they weren't toxic) and they seem just friends (when Robin leaves Nick to go see him in the middle of the night, she implies that she would do it for any of her friends), but after Ted breaks up with Veronica because of Robin everything is weirdly coated in this sort of tension between the two: first Ted loves her, but she doesn't, so when he helps her by taking her to Barney's proposal ("which means my best bro in the world has given me his blessing").

And, by the way, every time they try to paint Ted as the guy that comes through for Robin after this moment, they dumb down Barney's character. And still fail to make Ted a better guy than him (see: the carousel in Central Park).

Yes, Robin and Ted have some chemistry, but it is nothing compared to what Robin and Barney have. Every time Robin is jealous of Barney, it doesn't seem like a stupid whim, just because some other child is playing with her toys (except, perhaps, during The Robin). Robin and Barney's relationship would need a whole other post, and the next time I rewatch the series I will write down all the things that make them perfect for each other, but, to me, the biggest difference between the two relationships is this: in season 6, when she's not dating either one of them, Ted accuses Robin of never making him feel needed while they were together, whereas Barney praises her for it. Those are elective affinities: that's what Barney and Robin have, and what Tracy and Ted have.

Barney and Robin have more or less the same arc: they both get over their fear of commitment and they do that with each other. Time and time again, we are told that if they're ever going to settle down, it would only be with the other. The first time they break up is honestly so stupid, and even when they are broken up, they are the best of friends, which also makes Robin's behaviour in the finale look so stupid. The way the two of them fit together is unparalleled, both in a romantic and a platonic way.

Think about it: Robin makes Barney a better man, while she makes Ted a worse one.

Also, the whole point that there are different seasons in life for everything gets thrown out the window: apparently, Ted and Robin (that were a couple that ultimately worked in their young twenties) are the same people in their forties.

But that's not even the worst part. The worst part is that the two final episodes butcher Robin's arc as well: episode 23 starts with Lily saying "I want this girl to be in our lives" and we know Robin never made other friends outside of the gang, because she didn't need to, and now she walks away from everything because of fucking Ted?? This is saying "hey, Robin was only in the group for Ted, who brought her in, and now she leaves because he's not her puppy anymore". Robin was the one that was eternally indecisive between Ted and Barney and you're telling me that three years and many many life experiences later, she's still not sure?

The point of her story is learning how to get over her fear of commitment, learning how to be there for her friends (there's an entire episode dedicated to that, and it's the one where Lily's pregnant and we meet Robin's ex-best friend in Canada), and how to balance her job and her life. Also, the way her character is treated is un-feminist and un-progressive: she becomes Ted's consolation prize. She is passive throughout s9. She cannot, ultimately, win the modern-day struggle most women have and balance out career and love life, so her true life, her "happy chapter" begins after she has already accomplished everything she wanted to and she's free for Ted. She doesn't even go back to him, she just the prize the main character wanted for all his life and only got in the end because his wife died (ONE SCENE, people, ONE SCENE!). Also, this makes Tracy the "broodmare" that gives him the kids he wanted, and his "happy family" experience before he goes to be with his one true love.

The mother

This. This makes me so mad. One whole season spent on building up Tracy's character, just for it to go to waste. It would have been so easy to screw her up, but she is hands down the best thing about s9. She's the perfect woman for Ted and the episode shot through her perspective is the sweetest. By the end, I liked her more than Robin and Lily. She was the perfect addition to their group, she fit together with them in a perfect way, and they show us the biggest moment of her and Ted's life... for what? To have her die in a few sentences? And I don't care if they shot a funeral scene, I don't care if the finale was supposed to be 40 minutes long, because, in the end, it wasn't. The scene where Ted meets her is the second most beautiful one (after Barney's proposal to Robin) and the climax of the whole show, but they ruin her... and for what? The chemistry Ted has with her, he has with no one. The joy she brings him, the way she understands him, is unlike any other. I am sure that one of the reasons they killed her off was the shock value and I hate it.

I cannot stress this enough: Tracy makes Ted a better person. When he's with Robin, Ted is "the nice guy" in the most selfish and narcissistic version of the trope. When he's with Tracy, love comes easy to Ted. Also, the scenes between the two of them are arguably the best Ted scenes of the show.

The kids' reactions (ugh)

It's not really what they say- it's the way they say it. The end of HIMYM was not supposed to be funny, even though the show is a sitcom. It was supposed to be bittersweet and beautiful, because it's the end of an era, and the writers must have known that. So, Ted finishes telling his story, reveals to the audience that their now-beloved Tracy is dead, and the reaction is: "No, ahah, you totally have the hots for Aunt Robin" (their words, not mine). Like, what the actual fuck? I cringed when Penny said that. It's tasteless and not fun at all. Even if it has been six years... It's still your fucking mum, show a little bit of sadness at the thought of her.

The reason the show ended this way

What makes me especially mad is that I know for a fact that the reason they went with this ending is that it was the original one, always intended for the show, from season 2 onwards. And, if you watch it right after s2, it makes sense. But if you consider the eight years that passed and the massive character development, then no, it's not the best possible one. So many things hadn't been decided yet back in s2, especially about Barney, Ted, and Robin, and I hate that they didn't dare to scrap their work. This ending probably had sentimental meaning to the writers, but authors have to do what's best for their characters, not themselves. It's like with GoT, in a way: I think that the authors were all too aware of the impact of HIMYM and didn't believe that their finale would live up to the expectations... which compelled them to make the worst decision possible?? Every single character is OOC during the episode. Oh, and Marshall and Lily moving in the last episode is a ripoff from Friends (or maybe a tribute? Idk). Anyway, I believe that the authors were too attached to their sentimental version of "what should have been" and didn't give the characters the endings they truly deserved.

"Life works this way" // "Life only moves forward"

Some people say that the show is realistic because that's how life works. But I call super-BS on that. That might be true, and yes, people do get sick and die (Max, Marshall's dad...) and life does go on. But then, you don't frame it the way they did. It's just bad storytelling if you do it like that. And the problem is not the structure of season 9, because the characters develop in that season. The problem isn't even the mother's death. The problem is Ted ending up with Robin because that's not life moving forward for him, that's him, doing the same thing he did in 2005, 25 (twenty-fucking-five) years before!

In conclusion, this finale is incoherent and inconclusive, and not satisfying at all. The only character that gets a good ending is Marshall: why is that? What makes his ending great? It's the fact that his character arc is respected and he finally gets what he's been working towards for more than ten years.

#himym #how i met your mother #how i met your mother spoilers #how i met your mother finale #09x23 #09x24 #robin sherbatsky #ted mosby #tracy mcconnell #barney stinson #marshall eriksen #lily aldrin #swarkles #ted x robin #ted x tracy #barney x robin #a rant #the blue french hor #the yellow umbrella

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hxneydreamers · 3 years ago

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Hello, could u share your journey in the law of assumption and how u started and what progress you've made till now, what you had trouble with at first and how you resolved them, and finally what concepts made everything click for you and made manifestinf super easy like being on a roll for you? And thank you for starting this cool blog 😊

Hey! I'd love to!

I'll first point out that I am still learning and whilst I am here to help people manifest, I am learning alongside you! I want you to know that I am very well educated on the law of assumption, and I am also currently manifesting an SP. I have manifested lots of things in the past (like traveling, meeting a celebrity crush, as well as multiple specific people including my current SP), but I never really pushed through because I never properly tried. I was always on and off my game for a number of reasons, so I would receive my manifestations, but not in full, and this was all because of my self-doubt and self-concept.

I first discovered manifesting with the Law Of Attraction a few years ago after watching the documentary 'The Secret'. I had NEVER EVEN HEARD about manifesting before, and I felt like it was a bit far fetched.

For a very long time, I was extremely non-religious, I didn't believe in God or magic, the afterlife, spirits, fate, NOTHING! I was the biggest non-believer out there. When I watched 'The Secret' I tried to simply change my attitude to be positive as much as I could so I would only attract positive things in my life, and I noticed it worked for a little while, but it wasn't anything significant. I pretty much forgot all about manifesting very quickly, because I never took it seriously.

The next year one of my friends was obsessed with the law of attraction and twin flames and all that spiritual stuff, and she was trying to convert me a bit. I was intrigued by the concept, but I didn't really believe in any of it at all. I just liked making vision boards with her for fun. I never took any of it seriously.

My friend made me go to a psychic with her for fun one day and I resisted and said no, but I eventually gave in because I got curious. Seeing this psychic was extremely earthshaking. I won't go into detail about my experience with her, but some things happened that pretty much changed my view of life and way of thinking. I was much more open to the possibility of things like manifesting.

A year ago, 2 people close to me sadly passed away. I felt very lost and I spent many nights awake and I stumbled across 'Sammy Ingram' on youtube and discovered the Law Of Assumption. I began to binge watch her videos and I did sooooooo much research about the law. I was immediately obsessed.

I started manifesting text messages and instant replies and dates so easily because I was so excited about it and felt no doubt that it would work.

I had success manifesting an internship, consistent shifts at work/consistent money flow and other money manifestations, I manifested dating a specific person (but I ended it for natural reasons), I manifested another specific person literally within a night, just to see if I could do it, and I manifested my current specific person as well (we have a past).

After these successes, I ended up having to deal with some personal issues with my grief for a while, as well as finish my studies, AND my internship, which took my mind off manifesting, and as a result, I manifested negative circumstances in many areas of my life, because I let myself spiral.

I won't tell you the old story too much, because I don't want to revisit it, but basically, for years I had been stuck in a cycle of being abandoned. I felt unlovable and my self-esteem was quite low. All of these beliefs were reflected in many ways, and I was constantly worrying about everything. My internship became toxic and I wanted to leave, my relationship also ended temporarily, and my self-concept was very very very bad!

I felt like I was obsessing over everything in my life going wrong and I wanted to manifest my SP because I thought that he would fix everything, but by putting him on the pedestal I was stalling.

As soon as all this happened, I was of course upset, HOWEVER, I had suffered so much loss at that point that I was determined to make sure that I turned my life around. So I decided to manifest ending my internship naturally, rather than me leaving or being dismissed.

I started visualizing a conversation with my superior where they told me that something came up and we would have to pause the internship.

Literally, two weeks later, he met up with me and told me this exactly, and he said that the decision was ultimately up to me if I wanted to continue later or not. So I said that the timing would not work with my studies, and I successfully manifested leaving the internship naturally.

Next, my SP.

- I literally went to sleep every single night repeating my affirmations.

- I affirmed every single day, I affirmed through tears and I affirmed with my friends. EVERY CHANCE I GOT!

- I started affirming from a place of peace, indifference, faith, and trust that it would work out

A week later we were back together again.

My struggles with the law were mostly that:

- I KEPT CHANGING MY AFFIRMATIONS

- I was on and off my mental diet

- I kept looking for confirmation in the 3D

- I kept repeating the old story

- I focused too much on my SP and not enough on me

About 2 months ago, I had a breakthrough where I decided I needed to completely change everything in my life to put myself in control.

- I started listening to music that made me feel extremely happy and would watch movies and shows that put me in a great mood

- I decided to pick my affirmations and stick with them NO MATTER WHAT!

- I started having a better mental diet, and I noticed results immediately

- I started being able to say 'I don't care what I see, I'm getting my manifestation, and genuinely feeling relaxed and peaceful about it

Once I shifted the focus onto myself and even took some space from my SP, I felt amazing 24/7 and my mental diet was practically perfect.

He has started implying that we are a couple, I don't feel needy, and don't even text him much anymore, he is the one chasing me and constantly blowing up my phone. He is constantly asking to see me, begging me even. He initiates ALL CONTACT NOW! Finally, the whole tone of our relationship has changed and our interactions have been extremely amazing! I have never felt so confident in myself and I can see it reflected in how he treats me.

I manifested him in steps to build our relationship to this point, and I didn't want to begin manifesting commitment until I felt my self-concept was perfect, as I want a healthy relationship with him. Now I am finally beginning to manifest the final stage: official commitment, and I am certain that I will get it!

My biggest tip based on my own experience is to:

- Persist in the same affirmations.

- Do not affirm from a place of desperation and lack

- Keep yourself busy and prioritize yourself and your life, they must reflect this and prioritize you as well

- Trust that it is done and don't check the 3D for confirmation

- If you started having negative thoughts, PERSIST! Do not be discouraged!

- If you know that you have been doing everything right, but suddenly everything feels wrong and your negative thoughts are coming out all at once and/or the 3D looks like shit, you could be in a transition period. THIS JUST MEANS THAT YOU ARE FINALLY GETTING RID OF THE OLD BELIEFS AND YOUR MANIFESTATION IS REALLY CLOSE! SO PERSIST THROUGH THIS!

So for whoever is reading this, please remember that I am here to help you, AND I am on this journey with you! We are all human and none of us is perfect!

I'll share updates on future manifestations in the future, but this is my story so far and my current manifestation in progress!

I will probably make a post in the future about past manifestations such as celebrity crush and travel etc.

#manifest #manifesting #manifestation #law of assumption #neville goddard #affirm #affirmations #persist #self love #self concept #self worth #healing #spirituality #law of attraction

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totallyimagines · 4 years ago

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Owari no Seraph reaction to your Periods

I have a whole comforting Masterlist in my drafts and I’ve still got a lot of scenarios and headcannons I want to do..and I have a lot of other Masterlists but it’s actually just to help me keep track of things because I’m super messy..I’ve been posting owari no seraph all week. Nothing is wrong — just got a lot of ideas for everyone in the anime

Warnings: Cowards, Menustration for Da vampires..of course, mostly just these men being afraid of you

That face..is so accurate for this situation — I don’t know what else is. He’s a little lost..but he knows the basics. Seriously, don’t cry around him (I.e dropping food,) — like he would literally look at you like come on..

I can see him being like the one that points out that your on your period because of your mood change or something..like I’m just sure he can tell and then he’s immediately like “oh shit..” If your mood swings are violent or if your just super mad, he’s afraid of you. You scare this man..who knew you had so much power in that small body — seriously, he called you Hulk one time because you got mad at the wall ‘hitting your body’ and started to square up with that wall. If your emotional, *insert eye roll* “you’re such a baby.” You dropped your box of chocolates on the ground? Big deal..don’t cry about it.

If your emotions are in between — anxiety.

Ok, he understands most of your emotional outbreaks though..not emotional — “Sensitive”.. I can see him being like tired of you crying but super understanding — either way..I think he’ll keep his distance if you start crying about something like food or just something that’s really dumb to him.

When your appetite changes: he’s more scared than that then your strength. When he sees you eat foods that I’m sure he wouldn’t dare touch.. just watches in fascination. Like, how do you eat that much ice cream without stopping? Or why are you eating ice cream and peanut butter? He would probably just be so scared of that, watching you eat a full box of pizza by yourself.

Cramps? Holy shit, are you ok? Once you’re bending over in pain, he’s honestly so worried. Although, he may look so unaffected by you doing this. He’s truly concerned. He’s more of the groaner when you have cramps. Because he doesn’t want you to be in pain in the middle of cuddles. But guren holds you tights so I doubt you will be able to really feel cramps during cuddling with him.

*Coward = 1

He’s so quiet when you’re on it..like he doesn’t want to say anything that will trigger you though but he can smell your blood though which also makes him want to avoid you..unless you want to have...No, ok.

He’s scared of your mood swings too, one second you’re crying and then the next you’re squaring up with your reflection for looking like you. If he wasn’t your boyfriend he would say you were crazy..I’m sure any normal person would right? He’s suprised by your increased strength too, you boxed a vampire for some ice cream — and you won, of course. Ice cream never fails to disappoint.

When he wakes up to you with blood in the bed, and it’s coming from you..he thinks he killed you. *violently shakes you awake* when you tell him it’s your blood — which I’m sure you’ll have to explain the whole blood process..you’ll have to change your own sheets because he’s lost. I mean all types of lost, he doesn’t even know what pads are.

Appetite Change? He didn’t notice..

Cramps? He just kinds of nuzzles into you, rubs your stomach and asks if you feel better. If he can’t help he’ll just follow your instructions. The leaning over in pain or you can’t move is really unnerving for him. He just doesn’t really want you to be in pain. Curse these Cramps. Their hurting you. He was probably convinced they were killing you at first.

Would probably want to do Menustration too? Your blood is just super tasty to her, just let her get a taste.

Doesn’t really care about your mood swings, she’s the same way. I’m sure she’ll probably encourage the mood swings making you take it on someone near you. So amusing. The strength that you have in that tiny body is unbelievable. When you fought someone over a box of twinkies and almost broke their nose..what do you humans see in food?

*She probably won’t even care when she sees blood in the bed. Unbothered.

Appetite change, she definitely notices that. Like your so hungry all the time or your barely hungry at all. She’s actually really uncaring about what you eat though, it’s not really interesting to her. Or she just doesn’t really seem to care about how much you eat either. She watched you gobble down that whole box of twinkies with ice cream..she’s impressed.

Cramps? She’ll get some servants to treat you to whatever that you need.

Crowley is probs(*definitely) up for menustration..your blood is tasty to all vampires. Like he’s so hungry for you know, smells your cycle before it even starts. Yes, he’s keeping track. Which is probably a bonus on your side if you have a vampire as your lover.

Mood swings? Crowley knows how to get you really upset to the point where you want to make a dent his face. The strength in that small body of yours is incredible. Crowley tried you one time, never again. If your emotional, he’s just so playful about it. Like, he’ll comfort you just by saying some sweet words and then everything is good again. Well, you stopped crying for now. Win for him. Ice cream and Chocolate and you almost killed a person for that? He fears you now. He’s learned to keep food out of the fights. You’ll go into beast mode for that.

When he wakes up to see blood in the bed..he begs for menustration. Like there’s no better way to clean it up..why not? He’ll pout but let up after like 30 mins of asking. If your comfortable with it, you’ll get the best eating out of your life. He heard sex easies up your cramps? So why not?

Appetite Change? Who’s she? Oh yeah, you eat a lot. Like seriously he really doesn’t care.. sort of just lets you eat whatever because it’s your body. Why not?

Cramps? He chuckles but helps, his laughing is sexy guys.. I think I’ll trade that out for cramps. He’ll cuddle you and rub the spot that hurts you the most. He’s actually so good at this actually. He may stay silent and it may get a little dirty. But his “massaging” is not that bad and it actually easies up intense cramps.

Ferid definitely wants Menustration. If you want oral, this is the way to go. If he gets blood and you get oral. Win - win. So this is actually the best way to bribe him with some oral sex. Well, if that’s if he didn’t already ask.

Mood swings? Laughs the entire time, no it’s not a chuckle it’s him down right laughing. He loves them, you can be so angry and emotional in just minutes and he loves them. You scared him with the strength though. I’m sorry but who fights someone for candy, noodles or just ice cream? And just so you can binge eat it. He finds this really interesting and amusing because vampires do the same. He’s never really seen humans fight for food..like that. Emotional mood swings, nuisance to him. He’ll comfort you but like it’s just not his thing. Finds it weird when you get mad at inanimate objects — it can’t talk..

When he wakes to blood on the bed and your still asleep..yes..he’s going to eat you out. You can’t question it. He just wants to be between your legs lapping at the blood. You’ll wake up to him doing that at least once. No blood is going to go to waste with him around. And yes, he knows when your period comes and goes.. the going part sucks for him especially if you didn’t let him taste it.

Change in appetite? Umm...He notices but chooses not to. He’s practically the definition, I see you but I choose not to. Like, he’ll watch you eat the food but won’t comment on it. As he should. Again, you eating doesn’t really apply to them. They don’t really care what you eat, yeah they may watch you but seriously they aren’t judging you.

Cramps? He can hold you or cuddle you. He’ll run you a bath too, no he’s not getting in. It’s for you. But that’s probably all he’ll do. He’ll read to you if that makes you feel better? Gets your painkillers though he’s not going to let you go without those especially if you have really bad cramps.

Stays....away. Well, half of the time most of the time he’s really comforting and everything. He still keeps his playful additude nothing else.

Mood Swings? He’s scared too, like you’re so powerful. You’ve become so scary, what happened to you.. to him.. you’re a nightmare that’s walking around for a few days and then right after your period you’re a bundle of joy. That’s probably why he’s scared.. you switch moods so quickly that he can’t keep up. You’re battling people for food? Are you crazy? Ok, he’ll count you as crazy if you battle someone for something so simple and small as chocolate. Yeah, but he’s there for the whole fight cheering you on. Emotional — he’ll probably cry with you and it’s probably over a scoop of ice cream you dropped.

When he wakes up with blood in the bed, he’ll go run you a shower first. And ask you to get up so he can change the sheets. He’ll probably join you later and he’ll get you a snack. But sometimes he’s not there so.. not much there.

Appetite change? You’re eating so much Ice cream without stopping. He just stares at you, awkwardly..dumbfounded. Then you’ll probably get on from him staring to much, it doesn’t break his process. In fact, he sits besides you and stares and puts his hand up to his chin. Stares, and Stares..and stares.

Cramps? Knows exactly what to do, you bending over in pain isn’t taking lightly by him. Even if you say you’re fine — he’s going to run you a bath water and make you feel better. Snacks? That he can do. He’s honestly so easy going with this and doesn’t make it such a problem.

Smirks.. ah, it’s that time of the month again. He just corners you until you give into trying the Menustration thing at least once. He’s so tempting. Sorry Lacus but there is way more to it then just Menustration, ok?

Mood swings? He’s not scared but he’ll watch you from afar. Like, you’re not scary from back here but up close — you’re scary. You don’t know wether to take that as an insult or compliment. All that strength though — how come you aren’t fighting battles? He’ll want to battle you over some chocolate, maybe some tug of war? Let’s just say — you won..chocolate beats everything. Emotional, *sigh*.. He’ll just watch you cry like, what else is he supposed to do? Yes, he seems so uninterested in this.

Menustration: Don’t let this boy tell you any different, he loves eating you out while doing this. He’s super lazy — yeah, yeah whatever. But he’s cutting corners just so he can get a taste of you tonight.(my bad, that was cheesy)

Appetite change? Again, doesn’t care. Doesn’t even stare. He might tease you with it.. holding it above his head. Which also didn’t end well, so he stop doing that. He totally call you vicious right after that.

Cramps? Lucas doesn’t really know much on that department. Another teaching lesson. He’s a little worried at the sudden pain honestly. Watching you bend over in pain isn’t what he’ll like to see when he comes home. Other days, you probably won’t even want to get out of bed and Lucas is right there. Asking if there is anything he can do to make you feel better.

That quick? It was just here last week.. what happened? Lost again.. just lost. He just doesn’t understand why you have this. He’s close to crying..

Mood Swings? Stays away..you’re scary. You’re always trying to box something such as the chair that you bumped into. He’s more than dumbfounded, the way that you’re talking to inanimate objects though makes him laugh. You’re seriously cursing out a stool? Emotional, he doesn’t do so good. He’ll comfort you like he’ll usually do. But he may not know how to really solve the problem so say goodbye to that delicious Oreo cookie you stepped on.

When he wakes up to blood in the bed, he’s not as lost because he already knows but he’ll stare for quite a bit before waking you up. And doing what you do when this happens. It’s either because your too embarrassed and he’s says he’ll do it or your on the verge of crying.

Appetite change? Can care less, you’re hungry then eat. He won’t even question you getting up late at night to eat. He’ll just let you leave from the cuddle session to go do whatever you want to. Late night snack sounds good to him, why not?

Cramps? He hates seeing you lean over in a pain every once in a while. He’ll do anything to try and make it feel better. He’ll get you some painkillers. And if your cramps are really bad, he’s not really good at comforting but he’ll do what you tell him. He knows you’re in pain so he won’t push your limits.

#guren ichinose x reader #guren ichinose #mikaela headcannons #mikaela x reader #mikaela hyakuya #crowley eusford x reader #crowley eusford #ferid bathory x reader #ferid bathory #yuu x reader #shinya x reader #krul tepes x reader #krul tepes #lacus x reader

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bebepac · 4 years ago

Text

Pop’s 🌎 World

This is a very special Mia’s 🌎 World. It’s kind of a stand alone, as you could have not read the previous series and know what’s going on here. It’s about a father’s love for his daughter. But if you are curious to go on a binge read:

Book One: Pop’s Place

Book Two: Mia’s World

I’m also participating in @wackydrabbles prompt # 91 picked by @ofpixelsandscribbles “I’m worried about you.” which will appear in bold.

Original Post Date: 04/20/21 at 7:03PM EST.

The Book: TRR (this is typically a crossover, but none of the crossover characters appear in this chapter)

Pairing: Mia x Jaiden (TRR MC x M!OC)

Word Count: 1976

Warnings: Pops laying on all kinds of Daddy Fluff. Brief mention of pregnancy complications, with no specific or graphic detail.

Summary: A glimpse into the past, present and future of Pops. We will be getting to know, the softer side of Pops Jones.

A/N: Writing is truly one of the ways that I have dealt with a lot of unsettling feelings I’ve had over the years, and this one is very cathartic for me. I never had the best home life growing up. Pops is the personification of the father figure I wish that I had growing up in those more formative years. He does remind me a bit of my Grandfather, but he passed away when I was young. So I write my Mia having the strong base that I wish I had. And maybe some things would have turned out differently.

A/N2: I don’t own the rights to the poem “I Trust You’ll Treat Her Well” by Dan Valentine which the words will be bold and italic throughout this episode. I did modify a few words to make it representative to Mia and her family, as Mia does not have blue eyes and light brown hair.

Song Inspiration for this Episode: I Loved Her First by Heartland

I don’t own the rights to the music.

Jaiden and Mia were staring at each other in awe as if they were in their own little private universe.

Tears welled in Pop's eyes as he watched Mia.

Pops never thought he was super sensitive until that moment. But seeing Mia, his baby girl, slow dance with Jaiden in her wedding dress, tore his heart to pieces, in a good way. Together Gloria and Pops had raised a beautiful, intelligent, strong young woman, who had found the love of her life.

Their very first dance together as husband and wife was breathtaking, and the newly married couple had nothing but smiles and a few tears for each other, and whispered sweet nothings in each other's ears.

Maybe not so sweet.... as whatever Mia had whispered caused Jaiden's cheeks and ears to flush a rosy pink, as he gently tugged at his collar a bit. 🍋🍋

"She picked a good one, Pops. He'll take care of her. He always has." Gloria whispered in Pops ear.

"I know. It doesn't make it easier. I loved her first."

Pops stood before them with a smile. Since they were done with the formal pictures, Pop's tie was completely gone, and the first few buttons of his dress shirt were unbuttoned. Pops was a simple man. But his feelings about that day were anything but simplistic. Pop's soul was a storm of emotions inside his heart: happy, melancholic, and bittersweet, because not only had he given his daughter away to be married, but he was also gaining a son, whom he loved dearly.

His eyes met with Mia's from across the room. She smiled at him, but as he refocused on her, he saw the little girl that loved to play dress up in Mommy's clothes and makeup.

Clearing his throat, Pops began to recite the poem that he picked for today. His confident voice was already shaking as he gazed across the room at his little MJ, his eyes already beginning to tear up.

"Dear World,

I bequeath to you today one little girl… in a crispy dress...with two brown eyes… and a happy laugh that ripples all day long...and a flash of black hair that bounces in the sun when she runs. I trust you'll treat her well."

He never knew the person who would completely change his whole entire world, his heart was a little bouncing baby girl that weighed seven pounds and twelve ounces when she was born.

When he found out Gloria was pregnant, Kelvin wanted a boy. That's all he thought about. Someone to play ball with, and fish with. He got the shock of his life when he heard those three words. It's a girl.

Mia was born a week before Christmas. Gloria went into labor while they were at a Christmas party neither one wanted to attend. Labor was a fitting excuse for the pair to leave early. The one time in Mia’s life she showed up early to benefit her parents.

Gloria’s due date was Christmas Day.

When he first saw Mia's big brown inquisitive eyes, he knew she would be special. And Mia was, and she was the light of his world.

Mia’s first word was Pop. The reason everyone called Kelvin “Pops” was because of Mia. When Mia started talking she said it repeatedly. And it stuck with EVERYONE!

Mia was definitely a Daddy’s girl.

Mia took her very first steps following behind Pops. He had walked into the kitchen to make Mia a snack, when he glanced up from the counter seeing her toddling towards him.

"Pops!" Mia exclaimed enthusiastically as she took her slow and deliberate steps towards him.

Pops immediately knelt, opening his arms smiling brightly at her.

"Come to Pop Pops."

Mia made it to his arms. He picked her up and spun her around planting kisses, and raspberries on her cheeks and tummy.

He wanted his little MJ to stop growing.

Even though he loved Mia dearly, Pops thought about the possibility of them having another child. He thought then having one of each would be perfect.

But sadly the lightning never struck again for them.

Gloria sat on the side of the bed in tears.

“We weren’t even trying when we got Mia, and now that we are…. Why isn’t it happening?”

“I don’t know. Maybe we just got it perfect on the first try, my beautiful Morning Glory.”

“I know you want a boy Pops.”

“I wanted our child Gloria. Mia is our baby. I wouldn’t trade a thousand little boys for our Mia.”

He wiped Gloria’s tears.

“I’m worried about you.”

“I feel like I'm failing you.”

“You’re not, you gave me Mia. She’s more than we could have ever asked for.”

Mia had asked several times for a baby brother or sister. Until a sweet family with a little dark haired boy moved next door.

Daniel and Mia were inseparable.

“Prim and proud she’ll wave her young and independent hand this morning and say “Good bye” and walk with little lady steps into the school house.”

It was Pops that cried the first day of school when he waited with her at the bus stop. They had always had a very special close relationship.

“For five full years now I’ve been her sage and Santa Claus and pal and playmate and father and friend...”

Mia had her “Mommy time” with Gloria but as Mia aged, she liked to fish with Pops. She enjoyed being in the kitchen with him. At age ten Mia called out her first order to Pops that day taking the first step of creating ‘their special language' they talked to each other to this very day in the kitchen. Mia sat at the table with her book watching the waitress in front of her, listening closely to the order.

She called out the order to Pops loud and proud.

Pops glanced down at the order that Ginny handed him, as Mia recited in her own language what the customers wanted. He smiled at her, it made sense to her, and to him.

“I’m on it, MJ!” His voice boisterous. Little Mia learned the menu and started calling out all the orders to Pops.

His mind drifted to Kyle. Mia’s first serious boyfriend. The one he had basically thought he was so proud of Mia for finding. Kyle appeared to have it all. He came from a good family, and he appeared like he loved Mia.

Pops mentally took off his rose colored glasses and looked at his daughter’s relationship with him.

Pops saw all the warning signs he had been oblivious to the first time around. The sadness in his daughter’s eyes, she was trying to hide. The crash dieting. Mia wasn’t insecure before, but he now saw all the hints of it. And he had been afraid to ask. Why did he not ask her what was wrong? When he had such a good relationship with his MJ.

“Today she’ll learn for the first time not all who smile at her are her friends….”

Mia found the courage in herself to end that relationship.

And with the ending of that relationship ended another one. Daniel’s father was transferred to North Carolina. Mia was devastated with her friend moving away. But, it was very short lived, as Daniel’s father Jonathan let Pops know of a restaurant that was for sale in their area, that would give Pops the chance to branch out completely on his own and have his very own place.

Pops took a chance and packed up his family and moved to North Carolina and bought that little restaurant that the community now fondly known as Pop’s Place.

He remembered the first time he saw Mia interact with Jaiden. The two were very friendly with each other talking and laughing. Jason Brooks elbowed him.

“There is something special blooming between those two.”

Pops laughed looking at the two of them again.

“I doubt it seriously.”

Mia’s dance card was full, between Drake Walker, but Pops had his money on Liam Rys walking away with Mia’s heart.

“Twenty bucks says they’ll be dating before the end of summer.”

“You’re on Brooks.”

Pops lost that bet.

Watching the love blossom between his daughter and Jaiden made him feel young again. The love and the heartache.

The sweet little gestures of love and understanding.

*^*^*^*^*^*^* Fast Forward a year after the wedding *^*^*^*^*^*

"I think I finally got it right now. Hi MJ, hey Jaiden. Can you all hear me now?”

"We can hear you now fine Hey Pops, where's Mom?"

"I'm here, I had to take dinner out of the oven."

They talked for a few minutes.

"MJ you look like the cat that ate the canary. What's going on?"

"So we didn't agree on how to do this. We both wanted to tell you face to face but we didn't want to wait until Thanksgiving."

She looked at Jaiden. He smiled nodding.

"Mom, Pops…..”

Pops saw the tears in Mia's eyes.

"What's wrong?"

She held up a single picture.

Both her parents screamed in joy.

“It’s a boy!!!”

“We wanted to tell you sooner.”

Jaiden’s eyes filled with tears, as Mia leaned into him. His grip tightened around her.

“We had to wait a little bit, because we had some complications. I had to take some time off work. But we’re okay now. All three of us.”

“This is the best news I’ve ever heard!!!!” Pops was laughing and crying at the same time.

“You can't tell anyone yet. We’re telling Jaiden’s parents a little later on this evening.”

"We understand."

“So that means Pops, when we have the baby you’re getting on a plane and flying out here. Mom’s not going to let you drive cross country.”

“It will be fun, we could rent an RV like we did that summer.”

“NO Pops. NO!!!” Gloria and Mia exclaimed in unison.

“That summer was a nightmare, Jaiden.”

For MJ, when it was time, he got on that plane. The simple man who lived between North and South Carolina his whole life, had raised a girl that loved adventure, and was living her life now in California as a fashion designer with her successful architect husband, and about to give birth to their first child.

Jaiden walked out of the delivery room with a proud smile on his face.

“He’s here. Six pounds and two ounces and twenty one inches long. He’s perfect in every way.”

Jason went to hug his son.

Later that evening, Pops and Gloria went in to see the baby.

Mia had been in labor for over twelve hours, but you couldn’t tell it from the serene smile that was on her face, as she held their first child in her arms.

Jaiden took the baby from her arms.

“Pops, meet your grandson. His name is Kaiden…. Kaiden Riley Brooks.”

(Author’s Note: yeah…. I know, I said Riley Brooks would never exist in a place where my MC is not named Riley…. But you know…. I had to mix things up. Technically this is NOT your Riley Brooks.)

Pops held Kaiden in his arms. The little baby opened his eyes to look at him. And in that moment Pop’s life was changed again by another little baby, this time, weighing six pounds and two ounces.

He kissed the top of his head gently rubbing Kaiden’s head full of dark brown curls.

“We finally got our boy Pops.” Gloria whispered as Pops rocked Kaiden in his arms.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^* Fast Forward *^*^*^*^*^*^*^*

Time flies as time always does. Pops and Gloria were visiting during the first week of school.

Pops grip on Mia’s hand tightened as she held her youngest child Luna on her hip, watching little Kaiden walk down the driveway to the bus.

Mia softly gasped as Kaiden stopped, turning around to her, and waved goodbye to her, and his little sister, and his Poppy; Mia was holding back tears.

“I know how you feel.”

“Does it get easier Pops?”

“You’ll always see him….them the way you do now. They will always be your babies. It’s how I see you. I’m so proud of the woman you’ve become Mia.”

“Thank you Pops.”

“So, world, I bequeath to you today, one little boy… in a little blue and gold uniform…. With two hazel eyes and a flash of curly brown hair that bounces in the sunlight when he runs.

I trust you’ll treat him well.”

Tags in the comments!!!!

#bebepac writes #mia's world #pops place #pops place part 2 #jaiden x mia #trr fanfic #trr fandom #what the fluff?#wacky drabbles #choices fic writers creations #fic of the week #tw pregnancy complications mention

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cakejots · 3 years ago

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this is us trying, Chapter 3 - The Decision

In this AU, they don’t know each other outside of the suit. And in this AU, Ladybug and Chat Noir love each other. But in this AU, Chat doesn’t want their identities revealed.

Written for @ladynoirjuly 2021

notes: this is a coherent story based on all the prompts; each chapter contains at least 3 prompts

Ch 1 | Ch 2 | Ch 3 | Ch 4 | Ch 5 | Ch 6 | Ch 7 | Ch 8 | Ch 9 | Ch 10

Read on AO3

8. Admiration

Ladybug shifted from her spot at the top of Notre Dame’s North Tower, awaiting Chat’s arrival. The time it took to get in contact with him again wasn’t very long, but it was longer than the intervals between their dates. She understood that he has his own life to live, and sometimes, their schedules just really couldn’t match up. But for this time, in particular, she couldn’t help but feel that he was avoiding her.

Was it really a coincidence that he got especially busy right after he left her alone on that rooftop? She didn’t know.

Even though Ladybug had arrived 15 minutes earlier, she had that irrational fear that he wouldn’t turn up. She knew Chat wasn't like that, he always keeps his word. But she couldn’t help it, the possibility that their relationship could take a turn for the worse frightened her.

Luckily, before her thoughts could spiral out of control, Chat landed a few metres away from her.

Relief flooded her chest as Chat slowly stood from his crouched position. She was about to run over and throw her arms around him when his words stopped her.

“I’m really sorry for what I’ve done that day.” Chat wasn’t at his full height, his body posture was humbled and he was rubbing his hands.

“What I did was horrible, and I’ve no excuse for the way I treated you that day.” He had his head lowered and his eyes glimpsed at her ever so often, to see if she was listening to him. “I understand if you want to walk away, I just hope you’ll forgive me.”

Her eyes harden, posture standing even taller than before. Ladybug eyed him. This was the second time he had talked about her leaving him.

“I’m not going to walk away, Chat.” Her eyes softened as he flinched from her sudden rush of words. “But I’ll be lying if I said that didn’t hurt. I just want to know why it happened.”

Tears filled his green eyes as he fixed them on hers. His face held a sombre expression, as though it physically hurt him to be saying those next words.

“My lady,” he pleaded with a voice thick of desperation. “Forgive me, I promise I’ll tell you one day. Just… I can’t— not now…”

Ladybug sighed.

“Please know that,” he quickly rushed to her and embraced her tightly. “I didn’t regret giving you that kiss! Never.”

Ladybug raised her arms and tightened her grip on him as he trembled.

“Thank you for your assurance, Chaton.” She pulled back and surveyed his face. “I’m aware that this is a bit insensitive, but could you wait here for 5 minutes? I’m just going to get some stuff.”

Chat grew uneasy. To be alone on a cool night? He was reasonably unsettled, especially after what had confronted him just moments ago. Ladybug said she wouldn’t walk away, but now she’s asking him to stay here? How could he not be worried?

“Just 5 minutes,” her fingers grazed his face. “I promise you’ll enjoy our date even more after I bring those things here.”

He should trust her. He knows he could trust her. After all, she had said she wouldn't leave. It happened once, it can happen again.

“We can call each other while I’m—“

“It’s okay, my lady.” He pulled back and smiled. “I’ll see you in 5 minutes.”

Ladybug wasn’t convinced that he’s okay, but she gave him a peck on the cheek to ease his doubts. “I’ll be back before you know it!”

And true to her words, she came back in 3 minutes, with two pillows, a thick blanket, and a laptop in her arms.

Chat eyed them quizzingly.

“We, are going to get comfortable and watch montages of ourselves!” She sat beside him, the Ladyblog web page now visible on her screen. “Looking at how awesome we were would give us that extra endorphins boost, don't you think?”

“We are still awesome now, what are you saying?” He wrapped the blanket around them.

She giggled. “We should do some parkour sometimes.”

Bundled up in blankets with their limbs tangled, they sat there watching the best moments they had while battling Akumas, fondness for themselves and for the other clear on their faces.

Ladybug has always been like this, trying to solve whatever issues that arise. It’s how they’ve won battle after battle. Even after the threat is gone, she’s still trying to salvage the situation, no matter how small it is in the grand scheme of things.

Chat was immensely grateful for what she had done tonight. The videos had really calmed his nerves and brought back all those euphoric memories he once had. The reason why he was doing this in the first place. The joy his lady had brought to him whenever he spent time with her. The love and admiration he felt for her as she stood up against Hawkmoth on their first day as superheroes, despite Ladybug believing that she wasn’t suited for her calling.

The love…

He tightened his hold around her.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, just mesmerised by how cool we are.”

How could he have forgotten? How miraculously amazing she was. No. She still is, up till this very day. Even after 6 years. Even after he denied her what she wanted most following Shadowmoth’s defeat. Even after what he’s done to their relationship. She never walked away from him, and is still trying to rectify the situation.

He wasn’t making it easy for her, even though it should’ve been after the final battle. It’s really unfair to her.

And yet, she’s still here, she still chose to stick with him.

This can’t go on.

He took hold of her hand and brought it to his lips. “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

9. Cinema

“Come on, come on, come on, we’re gonna be late!” Chat hurriedly pushed her into the cinema, worried that they wouldn't make it to showtime.

“Wasn’t that 5-hour binge-watch enough?” Ladybug was obviously excited about the movie, but she couldn’t allow him the satisfaction so easily.

“Of course not! This is the sequel to the series!” He continued pushing as if there’s nothing entirely wrong with his behaviour.

“And we’re heading to a cinema now. Didn’t you say you wanted us to be as discreet as possible?” She raised her eyebrow despite Chat not being able to see her face.

“Yeah, but it’s the premiere today! We won’t be able to watch it on the laptop.” They stopped at the cinema hall entrance and Chat scanned his ticket for the seat number before he continued pushing. “Also, watching in a cinema after hours of watching from a smaller screen is just a different experience, no?”

They finally arrived at the row where their seats were, but he continued resting his hands on her shoulder, guiding her to her seat before finally letting her go. “Besides, Parisians won’t kick us out after the ‘patrol’ stun we pulled.”

She rolled her eyes. “I mean we did do our job when something happened.”

Although animated films are popular in France, this particular one didn’t attract as many audiences as those action-packed animated films, which was a blessing and a curse because they would be able to get away with minimal attention on them, but also so many people are missing out on this greatness.

“Anyway, do you think we’ll cry again?” She rubbed her tear-stained eyes, “I don’t think I’ve any liquid left in me for that.”

“Nonsense, there’s definitely more in you,” he cupped her cheeks to have a better look at her. “And you still look so pretty even after all that crying.”

“Oh, quite the sadist, aren’t you? Does my crying bring you joy?”

“Come on, Buguinette, you can’t deny it was phenomenal.”

“Yeah, you’re right. It is phenomenal. But couldn’t we spread it out even more? The watch time on that series I mean.”

“I… I won’t have time for the rest of the week,” his smile fell as his hands caressed her cheeks. “I’m really sorry.”

“No wonder you wanted to spend the whole day today,” she teased. “Well, no worries about it! I love spending time with you.”

He moved his hand to hers and placed a kiss on her knuckles. “Thank you, my lady.”

And that’s when the lights started dimming. They relaxed into their respective seats, but not without interlacing their hands together.

The movie, of course, had delivered what the series had set out to do. The cinema was filled with sniffles and sobs and Ladybug and Chat Noir were certainly not spared from the experience. They were tearing like they had been all afternoon, the only difference was that they weren’t able to hold the other as tightly as they would’ve liked due to the armrest in between them.

And they didn’t realise the importance of tissues until that night. They had to go to the toilet to clean their face and clear their noses before continuing with other plans they had had for the night.

10. Moonlight

As they left the establishment, they were surprised to see how the gleaming of the silver orb that hung in the sky rivalled that of The City of Light.

Chat proposed spending the rest of the night at the top of the Eiffel Tower, given that it has been a while since they were there. And immediately regretted that suggestion when he remembered that their last memories of the Eiffel Tower were of him expressing his wishes to hold off the reveal right after the final battle.

But Ladybug eagerly agreed and was already well on her way. He had no choice but to follow through.

When he arrived, he was awestruck by the moon. He has—

“—never seen the moon this big! Wow!” Ladybug proclaimed as she took in the moon in all its beauty.

She was captivated by the glamour of the moon, but to Chat, it seemed as though she was basking in the moonlight. Her suit gave off a shimmering red glow not often seen and her dark hair looked midnight blue under it. Her back was towards him, but as she turned around to move towards the spot next to him, he felt his own heartbeat quickened. The brilliance of her blue orbs awed him, they were of a pigment he had never seen before in her eyes.

“Wow indeed.”

They moved to sit side by side on the edge and took in the view of the moon and of the city. Did they really enjoy this view of the city weekly before? Has it always been this beautiful?

“You know,” Ladybug started, breaking the silence. “I’m really glad he chose what he did in the end.”

“Yeah, they finally got together.”

She peered upwards. “It wasn’t an easy journey, but I’m so satisfied with that ending. I’m sure everyone was crying tears of joy too.”

That animated series as a whole was about conveying your feelings to the ones you love. Which he did, a lot. He was never one to shy away from declaring his love for her. But why did everything change after the final battle? Why did he change after the final battle?

His heart must’ve been tired of what his brain was trying to reason about, and thus led him to pick this series to watch, and eventually the movie. All the answers were there.

He knew his lady well enough and was certain that she wouldn't walk away. She has proved that time and time again.

So what was preventing him from being with her, when he very much desired to have a happy ending with her as well?

In some ways, his current predicament was similar to Gilbert’s. He was afraid. He was afraid that she’ll abandon him after she found out who he really was, and what he’s done.

But…

Chat looked over to see Ladybug moonbathing and enjoying the light breeze. Was it too much to hope for a happy ending himself? He knew damn well how Violet felt throughout the whole ordeal of trying to get Gilbert back by her side. Did he really want his lady to end up that way eventually, when he had the ability to prevent that?

No. That’s too brutal. The world was already cruel to him. But if he could prevent that cruelty and enable her to witness how beautiful life can be, how pleasant she had made life for him, he’d do it.

“Chaton?”

Those eyes that looked at him as though he hung the stars in her sky. Those wide blue eyes that never gave up on him despite his failure to give her what she wanted most. Those worried, concerned eyes, so full of love.

He was choked up with emotions.

“I love you.”

Ladybug inhaled sharply and stared at him unblinking, unsure if she misheard those words.

She reached out to him slowly. “Can… Can you say that again?”

“I love you.” He took her hand and squeezed it, leaning in to press his warm lips against her cheek.

He pulled back to see tears in the corner of her eyes.

“My lady?”

She still stared at him as her tears started to trickle down her face.

His hands flew to her face. “My—”

Ladybug threw her arms around him with such vitality that they toppled over. “I love you too!”

He pulled her in to close any gaps between them, so very glad that she still felt the same despite all that has happened. She planted a heartwarming kiss on his cheek as Chat landed on his back.

They basked in each other’s warmth and presence. He stroked her hair and she melted into him, happy tears flowing as her kitty was starting to declare his love for her again, verbally.

“My lady, can we meet up again tomorrow?”

“I thought you said you were busy?” She giggled.

“I did,” he grinned. “But who said anything about meeting during the hours of the day?”

#ladynoirjuly2021 #ladynoirjuly #ladynoir #mesfics #miraculous ladybug #fanfic #mlb fanfic #ladybug #chat noir #alternate universe #light angst #fluff #hurt/comfort #this is us trying

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hecallsmehischild · 3 years ago

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Recent Media Consumed

Books

The Silmarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien. About ten or fifteen years ago, I tried to read this and was totally overwhelmed by it. I kept it around, hoping maybe someday I might be able to read it. I finally have, and here are my impressions: WHY SO MANY NAMES. WHY YOU HAVE TO NAME EVERYBODY, AND EVERY TRIBE OF PEOPLES, AND EVERY INANIMATE OBJECT, AND EVERY LANDSCAPE FEATURE. WHY. *ahem* So. I have a general comprehension of the events of The Silmarillion, but I dealt with it by doing what you do for an impressionist painting. I (mentally) stepped way back and let all the names flow by me, and if there were names that were repeated a lot, then I mentally attached appropriate plot points and character details to those names so I could track with who they were and what they were doing. And, actually, I found myself able to hang on and enjoy the book for the most part. This is going to lead into a re-reading of the Lord of the Rings books, since I haven’t read those in about as long…

The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien. I haven’t read some of these books since pre-teen years, with one required re-read of The Two Towers in high school (i.e. it’s been many an age since I’ve read these and my memory of the stories has been far more heavily influenced by the movies). In re-reading the first book, I was struck by the extreme tone shift for the Elves and Dwarves. Elves seem much closer to happy, mischievous fairies than these ethereal, solemn pillars of elegance and grace the movies show them to be. And Dwarves are far more bumbling and craftsmanlike than the movies show. Aside from that, The Hobbit was a pretty solid adaptation from the book, and the book also reminded me that this story was the first time I experienced “NO, MAIN CHARACTERS DON’T DIE, HOW DARE YOU,” and probably was the first book to make me cry. I must have been 8 or 10 years old. I FORGOT HOW MUCH THIS STORY INFLUENCED ME.

A Conflict of Visions by Thomas Sowell. I have a longer-than-usual list of things to say about this book. First is that it was just that level of difficult that I was struggling to understand while reading it (on Audible), but I think I got it. Sowell has several base concepts that I see repeated throughout his books, though he does like to dedicate whole books to specific aspects of the same topic. He is pretty damn thorough that way. So, for example, I would put this book in the middle of a three-book spectrum of similar concepts: Intellectuals and Society (most concrete and easiest to read), A Conflict of Visions (next-level abstraction, a little difficult to read), Knowledge and Decisions (root abstract concept, very difficult, I have not been able to get past chapter 2). The second thing I have to say is about a couple interesting concepts it proposes. Its whole point is to help readers understand the roots of two ways of seeing the world that come into severe conflict politically, and he calls them by their root titles: the constrained and the unconstrained visions. He traces the path of each back through the intellectuals that most spoke of them (tending to contrast Adam Smith with William Godwin and Condorcet). Though he leans heavily toward the constrained vision (based on reading his other works) he does his best to make this book an academic study of both, with both of the visions' strengths and flaws and reasoning and internal consistencies fairly laid out. In doing so, he helped me understand a few things that make this situation really difficult for people on opposing sides to communicate. One of them is that root words and concepts literally mean different things to different people. I had some vague notion of this before, but he laid out three examples in detail: Equality, Power, and Justice. It was kind of astounding to see just how differently these three words can be defined. It makes me think that arguing about any specific issues rooted in these concepts is fruitless until first an understanding has been reached on terms, because otherwise two parties are endlessly talking past each other. Another really interesting idea he brought up is the existence of “hybrid visions” and he named both Marxism and Fascism as hybrid visions. This was especially fascinating to me because I have seen the accusation of “Nazi” flung around ad nauseam and I wondered how it was that both sides were able to fling it at each other so readily. Well, it’s because Fascism is actually a hybrid vision, so both sides have a grain of truth but miss the whole on that particular point. In any case, this was a little difficult to read but had some fascinating information. For people who are wondering what on earth this gap is between political visions, how on earth to bridge the gap, or why the gap even exists in the first place, this is a really informative piece.

Movies

The Hobbit & Fellowship trilogies (movies). I mean, it’s definitely not my first watch, not even my second. But I went through it with Sergey this time and that means the run-time is double because we pause to talk and discuss details. This watch came about partly due to Sergey’s contention that Gandalf’s reputation far outstrips his actual powers, so we ended up noting down every instance of Gandalf’s power to see if that was true. Conclusion: Gandalf is actually a decently powerful wizard, but tends to use the truly kickass powers in less-than-dire circumstances. That aside, this movie series was always a favorite for me. I rated The Hobbit trilogy lower the first time I saw it but, frankly, all together the six movies are fantastic and a great way to sink deep into lore-heavy fantasy for a while. And I’m catching way more easter-egg type details after having read the Silmarillion so it’s even more enjoyable. (finally, after about a week of binge-watching) I forgot how much this story impacted me. I forgot how wrenchingly bittersweet the ending is. I forgot how much of a mark that reading and watching this story left on my writing.

Upside-Down Magic. Effects were good. Actors were clearly having fun and enjoying everything. Story didn’t make enough sense for my taste, but it was a decent way to kill flight time.

Wish Dragon. So, yes, it’s basically an Aladdin rewrite, but it’s genuinely a cheesy good fluff fest that made me grin a whole lot.

Plays

Esther (Sight and Sound Theatres). < background info > This is my third time to this theatre. There are only two of these in existence and they only run productions of stories out of the Bible. The first time I went I saw a production of Noah, the second time I saw a production of Jesus. My middle sister has moved all the way out to Lancaster, PA in hopes of working at this theatre. My husband and I came out to visit her. < /background info > So. Esther. They really pulled out all the stops on the costumes and set. I mean, REALLY pulled out all the stops. And the three-quarters wrap-around stage is used to great effect. I tend to have a general problem of not understanding all the words in the songs, but I understood enough. I highly recommend sitting close to the front for immersive experiences. This theatre puts on incredible productions and if you ever, ever, EVER have the opportunity to go, take it. Even if you think it's nothing but a bunch of fairy tales, STILL GO. I doubt you'll ever see a fairy tale produced on another stage with equal dedication to immersion.

Shows

The Mandalorian (first two seasons). Well. This was pretty thoroughly enjoyable. It felt very Star-Wars, and I’d kind of given up after recent movies. Felt like it slipped into some preaching toward the end? Not sure, I could be overly sensitive about it, but I enjoyed this a lot (though I did need to turn to my housemate and ask where the flip in the timeline we were because I did NOT realize that the little green kid IS NOT ACTUALLY Yoda).

Games

Portal & Portal 2. Portal is probably the first video game I ever tried to play, back when I had no idea what I was doing. Back then, I attempted to play it on my not-for-gaming Mac laptop. Using my trackpad. Once the jumping-for-extra-velocity mechanic came into play, I just about lost my mind trying to do this with a trackpad and gave up. Later I returned to the game and played it with my then-boyfriend on a proper gaming computer. Now, after having played several games and gotten better at "reading the language" of video games, I decided I wanted to see if I could beat the Portal games by myself. Guess what. I BEAT 'EM. Yes, I remembered most of the puzzles in Portal so that's a little bit of a cheat, but I'd say a good 2/3 of Portal 2 was new puzzles to me. It is crazy how proud I feel of myself that I could beat Portal 2, especially. Learning how to play video games at this age has really knocked down the lie, "You can't learn anything." Though I still suck at platformers and games that require precision. Since I find those types frustrating, I probably won't be playing many. Games are about enjoyment, so I'll push myself a little, but not to the point where I can't stand what I'm playing.

The Observer. I like the concept and the art but I don't think I could keep trying to play this game. It's really depressing. My in-game family members all died of illness or accident or committed suicide. I also kept getting executed by the state. In order to keep us all alive I'd have to do pretty terrible things that I have a hard enough time contemplating even in a fictional setting.

Baba Is You. Fun and interesting concept, but I got stuck pretty early on. Don't think I want to push as hard on this one.

#recent media consumed #n00b gamer child #child loves books #child loves movies #child loves shows

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gubesboo · 4 years ago

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That should be me

HEY!! ITS MEEE! I posted quite some time ago that maybe I should post a fic so HERE IT IS FINALLY MY FIRST FIC! I’m in nursing school so it can be difficult to write also I read all of these amazing stories and think I could never so hopefully you enjoy this!

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Warnings: uhhh cursing, suggestive sexual language, mutual pining, fluff (cause I’m a fluff whor3), maybeeee angst? idk I think that’s it other than pretty bad writing!

Italicized = readers thoughts

Bolded= spencer’s thoughts

Word count: 3.5k

Y/N POV

Working at the BAU is not what you were expecting. Long hours, early mornings, sleepless nights. Don’t kid yourself, you loved your job, but at times it can seem that the bad outweighs the good. Only one thing could lighten you up on your darkest days and it was him. Doctor Spencer Reid. Spencer was everything that you hope for in a potential partner. He’s patient, caring, intelligent, also did I mention insanely attractive. Over the years of working there you and Spencer had become best friends, even rivaling Derek Morgan as his, and Penelope Garcia as yours. See being best friends is great, although completely platonic, the late night movie marathons, weekly coffee meets, along with working right beside him on your darkest days, you have come to love the brown mop of curly hair and hazel eyes that is Spencer Reid. Well, the problem that now is… BEING in love with Spencer Reid.

The bullpen having it’s normal hustle and bustle left you with your thoughts. You didn’t even recognize the man of the hour as he called out to you.

“Y/N…? Y/N... Y/N!!”.

“Oh.. sorry Spence, what’s up?”, you blushed a little, embarrassed that this man could have the power to zoned you out any minute of the day.

“Are you okay? You seem a little out of it.” Spencer so worriedly responded.

It’s the little things like this that could someone so easily make anyone fall in love. Spencer Reid could read you like a book, which is not something out of the ordinary for him. These microscopic gestures is something he knows that you take close to heart.

“What? OH! Yeah I’m fine Spencer this paperwork is seriously getting to me now.”

He let out a little laugh at your response. “Yeah I can see that, that’s why I offered you a fill on your cup of coffee.”

Yeah you know what else you can fill. You thought in your head for the quickest second but just as quickly you could feel the heat rising in your face. With this you were quick to stand up to take the attention off of you. “You know what yeah Spence that would a-actually be great! I’m just gonna...uh… go see Penny real quick, I forgot I was meeting her to give her back her… s-sweatshirt she left at my place!”.

Oh god are you screwed. Dammit Y/N get it the FUCK together. “Oh ha.. You know, that might be helpful” you reply trying to act aloof. Spencer just smiles hesitantly parting your ways as he walks towards the break room for coffee, and you go to Garcia’s to give her the ‘sweater’.

Spencer looked at you quizzically causing you to quickly turn to head that way. Just before you walked out of the bullpen you heard Spencer say “Uh.. Y/N.. do you want your bag?”.

Barging through the door of Penelope’s headquarters, she turns around at you wide eyed like you have just escaped a wild tiger.

“Y/N are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Great. “Penny I am LOSING it here.”

She looks at you worried like you actually have tossed your head off of your shoulder. “Oh this is about boy wonder now isn’t it” she so dubiously recognized.

“Yes Penny I have no idea what I’m doing here, I can’t focus on my work, I’m embarrassing myself left and right, and to make matters worse this whole thing is completely one sided!”.

Penelope looks at you sadly, she wants more than anything for you and Dr. 187 to get together but the stress of seeing you in this state almost breaks her heart. “Y/N, have you tried talking to him about it, we see the way he acts with you. Always going out of his way to make sure you are safe and happy, he doesn’t do that with just anyone…”

You had to give it to her, Penelope always puts on the bravest face for you, that’s why you love her so much. “It’s not just me Penny, what about JJ… or Emily even, he does the same for them… look I’m just trying to be realistic. Someone like Spencer would never go for someone like me. He IS a genius, and I can barely make it through one day where my mind doesn’t get sidetracked.”

Penelope had had enough with your self doubt, she knew you were one of the most talented on the team. “Y/N ENOUGH! First of all, JJ and Emily never stay with Spencer and binge watch Doctor Who til’ the break of dawn. We all notice the longing stares on the jet between him and you, the maybe a tad too long hugs before you guys leave… it’s obvious he’s into you. You know Spencer has a thing for germs yet he shook your hand on your first day here. Let that sink in for a second Y/N. Secondly, you are one of the smartest and talented people on this team. Remember last week when you guys were in Dallas, and YOU pieced together the unsub had a partner.. Y/N there would’ve been so many other victims if it weren’t for you, you have no idea how much everyone respects and values your accomplishments on the team, INCLUDING Spencer.”

Tears had welled up in your eyes, you never knew how much you needed these words of endearment. Sometimes it can be hard to believe this when you are always in your head about what you could've done better or simple mistakes that could've been avoided, sending you into a downward spiral. “Thanks Pen”, you smiled subtly. “I think I’m gonna go to lunch, do you want anything?”

“No Y/N I’m good. Please go talk to Spencer, I have faith that it will really end happily for you” Garcia replied kindly.

“You know what I will, also one more thing…” She turned back in her chair cautiously at what you might say next.

“Yeah?”

“Um.. if anyone comes in here asking what I was doing, can you say I returned a sweater to you?”

“Oh Y/N” Garcia said, releasing a school girl giggle, “You have SO got it bad”.

You laughed out of her office, timid of what the rest of the day had left to offer.

SPENCER POV

Ok that was odd, I hope Y/N is okay. Was it something I said? Oh God what if Morgan spilled the beans on how I feel about her. She’s my best friend, no what Morgan would never do that...well...would he? Just my luck Morgan was in the break room filling up his mug, walking in he gave me the slightest smirk.

“Well pretty boy how is it going with Y/N? Ask her out yet?” he said, taking a sip of his coffee giving him the side eye.

“What!? No.. Morgan you know she doesn’t feel the same about me, she’s never demonstrated anything that could elude to being more than friends. I know it will never happen.” sadly stated, Spencer began filling up the two mugs.

“Oh and you have?” Morgan said chuckling at Spencer’s reply, it was obvious that not even the genius had shown any type of actions that would sway Y/N into thinking he wanted to be more than friends. Spencer of course recognizes this but the simple things must account for something right? The subtle cuddles on the couch, constantly getting her refills on coffee, late night hangouts when Y/N was having a crying breakdown. He doesn’t just do that for anybody, she has to know this right? Maybe it wasn’t too obvious.

“Look Morgan, I’m trying alright? You haven’t told her anything have you, she’s been dodgy around me lately.” Spencer crouched into himself, thinking how he could mess up something that hasn’t even started yet?

“Come on Spencer, I mess with you a lot, but not when it comes to ya girl man. Look if you think something is bothering her just ask her about it, I think you guys are close enough as friends to where you can ask her about something like that right? And if she does know about your feelings then you have your answer, if not, lay it on her Reid. You always miss 100% of the shots you don’t shoot.”

Listening to these words almost encouraged Spencer but the weight of the fact that he might be rejected by the one girl he has opened up his heart to is too much to handle. It is easier to sit on the sidelines and wait for the opportunity to erupt then seize it himself.

“Yeah Morgan you’re probably right. I’ll ask Y/N about it at lunch. Thanks Morgan I’ll keep you updated.”

Morgan chuckled to himself “Well hopefully you don’t have to tell me, you can show me when you get back.”

With that, Spencer walked out of the breakroom with his and Y/N’s coffee right as she walked back into the bullpen looking slightly disheveled. “Hey Y/N! Lunch?” Spencer smiled at Y/N.

“Ummm… Yeah! Sandwiches?” Y/N replied, Spencer realized she usually had sandwiches when she was stressed. Carb loading seemed to make everything better. He mentally noted this to ask about later.

“Sounds perfect.”

With that Spencer and Y/N walked out of the office timidly, overwhelmed with their inner battle tension fighting at them.

LUNCH- Y/N POV

Walking into their go to sandwich shop down the street had a warm and inviting atmosphere. Almost like a hug from your grandma, it never gets old. The smell of freshly baked bread spread through the room and even calmed the nervousness that had surrounded Y/N and Spencer. The girl at the register you’ve come to know as Jessica, noticed her most loyal customers and greeted them with a warm smile.

“Y/N! Spencer! Welcome back you guys! Are we having our usual today?”

Almost embarrassed by the amount of times that they come in that the waitress knows their order. They nod in agreement. A BLT with mayo for Y/N and a ham and turkey club for Spencer.

“Don’t you know it Jessica” you replied, giving her a wink and handing her a 20. “Keep the change” you smiled.

“I’ll have it out to you guys soon!” She replied before going to the counter to assemble the lunch.

Spencer has seemed on edge since he asked you to lunch. Oh no had he caught on? Did he hear me and Penelope.. No he couldn’t have. Just breathe. It’s okay. You noticed Spencer about to say something when you were pulled out of your thoughts by an unfamiliar voice.

“Hi...Y/N?” you turned around to reveal a rather handsome man. What some would consider tall, dark and handsome. His black hair sat wavy on his head. He was cute you had to admit, just the perfect balance of toned without it being overbearing.

“Uh, Hi. I’m sorry I don’t mean to come across rude but...Do I know you?”. There was something about him that was right at the tip of your tongue. He did look familiar but you couldn’t place the face with a name.

“Oh right. Hi um Chase! From Easton Heights? We went to high school together.”

“OH MY GOD! Yes! Chase! We had Biology together right? Wow look at you! You look amazing, how are you?” Wow he has definitely aged well.

Spencer shifted uncomfortably. Maybe it was in his head but he could definitely see a connection between the two of them.

“Oh sorry Chase this is my friend Spencer, we work together.” Ugh friends, even saying the word left a sad tone on your tongue. So much hope and wanting in the word, that the one you hope would notice was completely blind to the idea.

Chase extended his hand for a handshake but was matched with Spencer’s typical skepticism, waving back at him instead of returning the endeavor.

“Don’t mind him, it's a germ thing.” you said to Chase seeming almost offended by Spencer’s action but nodded in an almost condolence type of way.

This brought you back to your first day with the team. After exchanging handshakes with Hotch, JJ, Rossi, Emily, Morgan and a bone crushing hug from Penelope (you knew at that second this woman was going to be your rock), last up was the genius himself. To his surprise along with everyone else's he extended his hand to meet yours to introduce himself. Everyone around gave skeptic looks to the other, but to be honest, it was hard to notice everyone else when looking into Spencer’s eyes. From that moment on, you were hook line and sinker to the pipe cleaner with eyes.

You reminisce about this moment along with Penelope’s words from earlier when you are pulled out of your thoughts by Jessica calling from the counter.

“Y/N, Spencer! Your sandwiches are up!” Jessica shouted from the counter.

Spencer went to grab the sandwiches from the counter while you and Chase continued the small talk. What he walked back in on made his heart sink to the pit of his stomach.

“Look Y/N I don’t mean to be forward but you obviously look great. I-I mean you’ve always looked great, I’m just saying adulting looks a-amazing on you. Anyways is there any way you are free tonight? Maybe we could meet up at this great Italian place in the city? Catch up a little?” Chase offered.

You had to hand it to him, he knew how to play his cards. As much as you wanted to hold out for Spencer, it was a stagnant relationship. No pull or tug anywhere as much as you wanted to, you didn’t want to set yourself up for heartbreak if you didn’t have to. You looked over at him. His face seemed unbothered by Chase’s actions. If he cared about you in more than a friend's way this would have bothered him right? If it did, he didn’t show it so you know what? Fuck it. Maybe it is self sabotage but, maybe this would be good for you.

“Uh, you know what? Yeah that would be nice. Maybe we can meet up around 7:30? Today is paperwork day at the office so I should be off at 5, gives me enough time to go home and change. Unless a case comes in of course.” You said handing him a card with your name and number on it, usually for business, but why waste time writing it down anywhere else right?

“Great I’ll see you then. It was nice meeting you Spencer.” Chase said with a warm smile before making his way out of the shop leaving you and Spencer in a limbo.

Well… THAT just happened. You thought to yourself as you walked out of the shop. Spencer seemed awfully quiet the walk back to the office only nodding and responding to your thoughts when absolutely necessary. Not even so much as the facts that you found completely endearing. You tried to brush it off as the midday lag, the sleep deprivation finally catching up to him, but that didn’t seem like the whole story. But at this point, you were tired of trying to read Spencer. Bigger and better things were waiting for you besides the man walking next to you. Or at least you hope there were.

THAT NIGHT- SPENCER POV

After an afternoon full of methodical paperwork, coffee, and self deprecation. Spencer goes home to his empty apartment, something that seems so full of light when Y/N is there.

If he had to admit it, this is something that Spencer had nightmares about. He knows it’s no one's fault but himself but he was right there. At lunch he was finally going to grow some balls and tell Y/N just how much he liked, probably loved her. But Chase happened. What if you fall in love with him, leaving Spencer in the dust. There is no way there could be time for a best friend AND a boyfriend. Especially not when Spencer wants to fill both rolls. He wants to be the one whose arms you wake up in. Who tries and horribly fails to make dinner for. To possibly get married and have kids with.

He ponders this while staring at you contact information on his phone, finger hovering over the call button. It is now or never. Spencer thinks.

“Fuck it.” Spencer says before grabbing his keys and coat, heading out the door.

YOUR APARTMENT- Y/N POV

Walking though your door and shedding your coat, you walk into your barren apartment thinking about the day you had. The rest of the work day had trudged along unbearably slow. You couldn't help but feel guilty accepting the date in front of Spencer. Sure, you guys were friends but on the way back and the rest of the day in the bullpen, Spencer had been avoiding you. When you looked over your eyes would meet, Spencer would clench his jaw and look immediately back down. He stopped the coffee refills, which was fine, but at some point he walked in on you pouring coffee just to do a straight 180 to walk out the door.

Ultimately feeling blue you decide to pick up your phone and text Chase to cancel the date. Not that you want to, but your head just wasn’t in the right place to go out. Even through the guilt of saying yes to Chase to get over Spencer, you thought this would be good for you, but it has only resulted in disappointment. Spencer should be happy for you! But it is obvious that this has affected him negatively. But why? Unless… no it can’t be.

A knock at the door pulled you out of your thoughts. Checking your phone it read 6:17 p.m.

“Huh?” you thought out loud.

Looking through the peephole you notice Spencer at the doorstep. Albeit sweaty like he ran a marathon, curls sticking out each and every way, you answer the door.

“Spencer? What are you doing here? Are you okay?”

Bending down to put his hands on his knees he holds up a finger to catch his breath. Finally waiting for a beat he straightens up.

“Don’t go.” He puts simply.

“What? Spencer.. What are you talking about? The date?” you say heart hammering against your ribs. This is actually happening right?

“Yes the date Y/N. Don’t play dumb. I can’t sit here and know you're going out with him Y/N. I… I love you. And I know it has taken me way too long to admit it but I thought about the future you could have with him, and to be honest that should be me there in that image, not him. I’m sorry if this is bad timing or if I’m too late, but I don’t care. I had to come here and tell you before I lost my nerve. I love you Y/N.”

You sat there mouth gaping open, staring him in the eyes. It felt like you just jumped into a freezing lake. Body frozen and heart hammering in your ears. Apparently this is the wrong move because Spencer noticed this reaction and turned to walk out the front door.

“SPENCER WAIT!” you called out to him. It was now or never too.

“I cancelled the date.”

“What?”

“Spencer, I cancelled the date. After I saw how you were acting, I.. don’t know… I felt guilty? Maybe it's because I’m trying to get you out of my mind. And I felt guilty for using Chase because Spencer, I am hopelessly in love with you. I mean unfathomably so. I just didn’t know you felt the same that’s why I never said anything. And I’d be lying if I hadn’t thought of the future with you in it Spence. I love you Spencer.” you say walking over to him grabbing his hands, intertwining fingers.

You never even noticed the tears in your eyes while you stared into his. The world seemed to melt around you as he leaned in locking his lips with yours. Salty tears mixed with the taste of him and everything felt right. It felt safe and normal.

You pulled away both of you smiling ear to ear as you wiped away the tears on his cheek. Leaning back in to place a chaste kiss on his lips.

“So what you’re saying is you have no plans for the evening?” Spencer so cheekily replied.

“Only with you.” You grin back with a soft chuckle pulling him to your couch for a long overdue Doctor Who marathon filled with cuddles and soft kisses.

#first fanfic #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #new writers corner #matthew gray gubler #mgg #female reader #im so soft #fluffwhore #derek morgan #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner

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glenncoco4 · 4 years ago

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You Can’t Count On Me

A/N: Chapter 6

••••

The sunlight streams in from the window, illuminating the two bodies buried underneath the fluffy white comforter. He slowly feels consciousness pull him into reality and what a spectacular reality it is. Peering down his body, the form of his beautiful girlfriend as she slowly startles awake brings a smile to his face. “Good morning, sunshine.”

She hums in appreciation as his lips touch the crown of her head and his fingers delicately dance up and down her spine, bringing a welcomed shiver through her body. “Mmmm. Am I dreaming?”

“No. Definitely not dreaming.”

“You know the last time I woke up after we made love, I was alone.”

“I’m sorry.”

She brushes off his apology, tilting her head back, the brunette brings her eyes to his. It’s been 4 months of her constantly thinking about what would’ve happened if he hadn’t left, and she always comes to the same conclusion. “At first I was kinda mad, but then I realized that if we had woken up together it might’ve been a little awkward or I may have panicked like I tend to do.”

“How do you mean?”

Her head finds his pillow as she burrows her face into the crook of his neck, breathing in the scent that is so uniquely him. “Well, we never really talked about our feelings before we jumped into bed together. I mean we loved each other of course but it wasn’t verbalized that we were head over hills in love.”

His silence startles her and she begrudgingly props herself up on his chest only to be met with a goofy grin playing at his lips. “What?”

“I love you.”

God those words coming from his lips is something she never let herself think about, but now its all she can think about. The feel of his touch, his smile...he’s everything. Throwing her leg over his waist, her heat meets his already hardening member, and oh how she loves everything about this new part of their relationship. “I love you, too, but I can probably show you better than I can tell you.” Leaning down, she can’t help but mirror his smile with one of her own as her lips meet his.

••••

After a very productive morning in bed the pair make their way into the Mission for the first time as partners. Kensi reached her desk, toss a deck of cards into his hands. “I need you to quiz me.”

“For?”

“I have lunch with Anna today.”

“I can’t believe she thinks you’re a curator.”

“What about you? She thinks you’re that guy from Fired Up.”

“I do fit the part, baby.”

They both freeze as the term of endearment leaves his lips. It’s weird but a good weird.

At the sound of their colleagues walking into the bullpen their smiles quickly vanish as Deeks lifts up the first card.

“Oh, uh, uh, Matisse?”

“Nope. Munch.”

He holds up the next.

“Van Gogh?”

“Cezanne.” He shakes his head in disbelief. “Seriously, Kens, why are you doing this?”

Before she can answer, Sam walks in, observing the pair. “Hazing the new guy or is he hazing you?”

“Haze me, Kens, please?” The shaggy blonde holds up the next card for his girlfriend, knowing there’s no way she’ll get this one.

“Seurat.” She answers.

The ex-Navy SEAL gets a glimpse of the card, instantly knowing the right answer. “Monet.”

“Bing. Bing. Bing. Sam proceeds to the bonus round and Kensi wins the consolation prize otherwise known as a steaming bucket of fail.” His words may sting but the wink he sends her lets her know that he’s just playing his part in their own little op.

They decided it could be fun deceiving their coworkers about their newly defined relationship. And of course the competitiveness inside them lit up at the idea of a bet as to who would discover what was really going on between them first.

The detective was a bit surprised that his partner chose Eric, he on the other hand chose Callen. Even though he’s barely had a conversation with the man there was something about his quite and questioning demeanor that told him the team leader would find them out first.

••••

As the day progresses the best friends are sent to the house that belongs to Vakar’s ex-wife. This is sort of their first test as a pair of undercover operators. It’s both exciting and frightening all at the same time. Experiencing something new with the most important person in your world is one thing but experiencing two new changes might be a challenge. A challenge that they’re both ready to face head on.

Stepping onto the sidewalk, the pair make their way towards the house as the blaring alarm sounds over and over again. “What do you know about alarms?”

“Do you not remember my stint with Robbery Division?”

“Right, it was around the same time I was taking the Counter Surveillance course at Quantico.”

“You mean the time you were always one upping me during our daily phone calls?”

She taps her knuckles on the wood frame door before turning to her boyfriend, studying the look in his eyes. “I’m not a one upper.”

“Not normally, but some how just with me.”

“Well I vaguely remember you one upping me this morning.”

His heart flutters as the spark shines in her mismatched orbs. The past 36 hours has been like a whole new experience with her in so many beautifully amazing ways. “Oh, touché.”

••••

As they step inside his apartment at the end of a long first day, the words she had spoken to Emma a few hours ago plays back in her mind. If this man loves you as much as you love him, its not gonna matter. It’ll bring you closer. She’s put off telling him for long enough and now that they’re together, she doesn’t want to keep anything from. Especially this. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

He takes hold of her hand, pulling her body into his before pressing a hungry kiss to her soft lips. A kiss that he’s been craving all day. “You’re not breaking up with me, are you?”

“What? No, never!” She quickly pulls back, shaking her head profusely.

“Good to know.”

The cocky grin thats curls at his lips makes her legs turn to jelly. Luckily his arms are wrapped around her waist, giving her much needed support. Taking a deep breath, she searches his eyes hoping that what she’s about to tell him won’t make him shut down.

He watches as her beautiful mismatched orbs swim with what he thinks is turmoil. There’s not a doubt in his mind that whatever she has to say isn’t something they can’t work through. He leans forward, placing his lips on hers reassuring her once more. “Kens, what is it?”

“It’s about Jack.”

His brow furrows in confusion. That is definitely the furthest thing he thought they would be talking about tonight. “What about him?”

“When he left...”

“Hey, look at me.” His finger finds the underside of her jaw, tilting her head up. Cerulean blues conveying all the love he has for her with one look. “I love you. Nothing’s gonna change that.”

A small smile spread across her face at his words because in their 20 years of friendship he’s never once lied to her. “I told you that he left because of his PTSD.”

“Yeah.”

“But that’s not the only reason he left.”

“Okay?”

“I guess I didn’t realize or want to truly believe what he was talking about until recently...Marty, he left because of you.”

“Me?”

She nods as a soft teary-eyed smile crosses her lips. Her thumbs finding the small of his back, nervously running back and forth across his sun kissed skin. “Yeah, he uh...right before he left, he told me all these things about how he always felt like he was coming in second place to you. He told me that I light up when you walk into the room and how he wishes that I’d look at him even a fraction of the way I look at you. The last thing he said to me was that I was blind not to see how in love I was with you and how you felt the same.”

His face quickly falls as he pulls back from their embrace, making her heart rate speed up. She wasn’t technically lying when she told him about Jack but she did omit a huge part that affected him as well.

As he walk over to the couch a heavy sigh leaves his lips. He sits down, his face immediately finding the palm of his hands as he tries to gather his thoughts.

Trying to remember what he said a few minutes ago about nothing changing his mind about how much he loves her, she can’t help but nervously bite her bottom lip as she finds her place next to him on the couch. “Will you please say something?”

“Jessica.”

“What?”

“The morning Jack left and you called me, I dropped everything to take care of you. After about a month, she...she uh-came to me and said that I needed to stop lying to myself.”

“Lying to yourself about what?”

“About how I feel about you.” He finally lets himself look at her, unable to get the image of them being together sooner and happier out of his head.

She always had the feeling that the redhead saw through her some how. They got along great, but something had changed in their interactions the last few weeks of her and Marty’s relationship. Now she knows what it was. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“When you said she left because you two were in different places you meant-“

“That she was in love with me, but I was clearly in love with you.” He nods, as the corner of his lips lift into a smile.

Her brow furrows, wondering what he was thinking or why he didn’t act on his feelings. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Why didn’t you?” He hits her with the same question, knowing that they more than likely have the same answer.

She willingly goes with him as he pulls them back against the couch. Immediately curling into his body for comfort, her legs find their way across his lap and its in that moment that she realizes how seamlessly they’ve fallen into craving each other’s touch all the time. “We really are quiet the pair, aren’t we.”

“That we are.”

It’s few minutes as they sit there in silence before she flashes back to that night. “Wait a second. You came over that night you broke up.”

“I did.”

Her brow furrows, wondering why he wouldn’t want to be alone after ending a year long relationship.

“After Jessica told me that I need to wake up, you called.”

“And you answered.”

A look crosses his face as if shocked that she would think he wouldn’t drop everything for her, no matter what it may be. “Of course I did.”

Tilting her head back, she looks up into his cerulean blues, her fingernails finding the scruff of his jaw. “Did we really miss out on 6 years together?”

They could dwell on what could’ve been but there’s no use in wasting any more of their time on it when they’re together, here and now. He shakes his head, trying to find the right words to say to her. “No, not really. I mean you’ve been the most important thing in my life, that never changed. The only thing’s that’s different now is, I can do this.” His lips find the crook of her neck, working their way towards the lobe of her ear. “And this.” He receives an approving moan as his hand works its way underneath the hem of her shirt and towards her breast.

Her eyes drift close as his lips work their magic and send her body humming with excitement. “Keep talking.”

He suddenly stops his ministrations and briefly pulls back, earning a disapproving moan from his girl.

Her eyes fly open, and is immediately met with a cocky grin. “What? Why’d you stop?”

“You just told me to keep talking. You’re definitely in love with me.”

“Marty.”

“Yeah?”

She shakes her head as her fingers curl around his golden locks, pulling him towards her. “Shut up.”

“And there she is.” His lips find hers as they fall against the couch, skin to skin, they become closer in more ways than one.

#Densi #Densi Fanfic #Kensi Blye #Marty Deeks #AU #Kensi x Deeks #You Can Count On Me #NCIS: LA #NCIS: LA Fanfic

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puppy-phum · 4 years ago

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2020 – a (content creator) year in review

I decided to make this into a mix of these two games I was (kinda?) tagged into so thank you for @leonzhng and @tiesanjiao ♥ I hope you don’t mind me doing it like this ^^ all the questions were just so interesting that I wanted to try!

(bc of the amount of questions, I’m placing them under a cut so that I don’t flood anyone’s dash)

(this is the 2020 year in review that hanyi tagged me to ♥ sorry am so late!)

Top 5 Movies you saw this year

wow tbh I didn’t watch many movies this year as I realized yesterday when I was thinking about this for certain reasons. Or at least I feel like I didn’t watch that many? Nothing really stuck with me it seems.

Because of this, I will only mention two: Parasite and The Old Guard. Those were both wonderful in their own ways and I’m very happy I got to watch them both ^^

Top 5 TV shows you watched this year

this one is difficult bc I watched so many (and forgot even more?) but:

The Lost Tomb Reboot (my introduction to DMBJ. this drama stole my heart and helped me through the tough autumn semester!)

Joy of Life (it’s nuts that this happened during 2020? it feels like it was ages ago)

Kingdom (such a positive surprise and I really hope we get more of this :o I really recommend!)

Detective L (easy, nice aesthetics, amazing costumes. Bai Yu was a delight as Luo Fei)

Sand Sea (I am still baffled by how much I loved this bc I had so many doubts? am happy I did tho)

Bonus: Guardian (bc it has come to stay and the rewatch has been so emotional but so rewarding)

Top 5 songs of 2020

this is a tough one too bc I’ve heard so much new music during 2020 but I will try to put it simply:

Black Swan by BTS (I absolutely adore this song. I listened to it on repeat when it came out at the beginning of the year, I have cried for it a ton, I enjoy every stage I see for it and it’s just a masterpiece. it has also helped a bit with my writing struggles that I’ve felt creeping up on me lately)

Always by By The Coast (an amazing song that always leaves me in my feels. inspires me a lot all the time)

Love me or Leave me by DAY6 (this whole album was a masterpiece and I listened to it on loop for like. two weeks? this was my favorite song on it even if I adored the rest too, especially Zombie)

all of my life by Park Won (listened to this a lot in relation to my xicheng and the wedding I finally got to write for them ;; that’s one good thing that came out of this year tbh)

雨人 by 刘畅 (Liu Chang) (with the Reboot’s ending song, this one is my favorite on that ost. I love Liu Chang’s voice, I loved Liu Sang as a character and as I said, I loved Reboot as a drama. I get super emotional about this ost so I think it defined this year a lot for me)

Top 5 books you read in 2020

All For The Game -trilogy (listened to these as audiobooks but that counts right?)

The Song of Achilles (as an audiobook too and really adored the reader’s voice)

The Smoke Thieves -series (I really just binge read the two first books in this series and am so excited for the next one!)

Call Down The Hawk (love love love)

Guardian novel (am not very into these novels usually but I was positively surprised this time? it was so cool to finally get the original story and compare it with the drama version)

5 positive things that happened in 2020

joined mdzsnet and met all the amazing ppl there and got to become part of this loving community and :’) I’m so thankful, it’s been a joy

learned more about editing? or started doing it regularly. I still can’t do shit but am having fun learning more all the time and I really hope that maybe the upcoming year I can switch to PS and try out giffing?

went to Halsey’s concert! it was in february so a bit before all the hassle with covid happened over here ;; it was super cool and so nice and I just. I love Halsey

fell into the DMBJ hellhole which am very much enjoying. it’s a great universe and the story is so good and the dramas have been so fun to watch and. it feels like a good continuation to The Untamed somehow haha (also brought me a new friend! you’re amazing ashen!! ♥)

started therapy and it’s been... a journey. but towards something better I think? it’s something I would’ve needed ages ago but it’s better late than never I suppose

My Creations

(this is the other part where ali was being super sweet and mentioned me ♥ thank you for being so awesome!)

1. first creation and most recent creation of 2020: wow it’s been a while since I’ve looked at this horrible creation but here ya go jkdhgk [x]. I’ve come a long way from this (and my xicheng has come a long way from this too). most recent one is this xiaoge edit that I absolutely adore [x].

2. one of your favorite creations from 2020: this wwx edit that was part of my agust d2 edit series [x]. I loved to give him blue instead of his typical red.

3. a new style you tried this year and a gifset edit that uses it: this [x] wwx edit which I don’t know if I like or not but I was playing around with the font and all the effects instead of just normal screenshots + coloring. also I just adore the quote.

4. a creation to be proud of: I could mention that xiaoge here but in addition, I will also say this wu xie edit for reboot [x]. I managed to capture my vision so well, I was surprised. for cql, this songxiao edit [x]. I loved how it turned out in the end.

5. a creation that took forever: this wangxian edit [x]. like I’ve said several times, I lost sleep bc of it. I just kept struggling with the third pic and how to place the text there D:

6. your creation from 2020 that received the most notes: this lwj/wangxian edit [x]. I had many ideas for this edit when I first started making it and I never managed to capture my vision in the way I first intended... the pictures I was supposed to use just never fit quite right sigh. I dunno why it was this one that gained all the notes in the end bc I personally think I have better ones too but am still thankful :’D

7. a creation you think deserved more notes: as said, dmbj fandom on tumblr is very small so I really want to say the two already mentioned ones (wu xie and xiaoge) and then my pingxie edits [x] [x]. also these wwx edits which I personally am very happy about [x] [x]. and from my agust d2 series, this yun bros one [x].

8. a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it: really just dmbj this year and I’ve already linked all of my creations for that :’D tho I have plans for another pingxie edit and a liu sang edit! oh and maybe I could mention guardian here with this shen wei [x]. I had so much fun while making it (also the quote just haunted me relentlessly until I gave it a moment).

9. a creation you made that breaks your heart: this must be my easter islanders (lwj and jc) edit [x] that just. awoke many thoughts in me? I’m going to put a link to the version where you can read my ramblings underneath :’D

10. a ‘simple’ creation that you really love: my creation for the creator (gif?) challenge that was going around! [x] it was simple and nice to do and I loved the result. also, it was nice to work with jl for a change :’)

11. a favorite creation created by someone else: oh wow ok so this is going to be rough bc I have so many favorites ;; you can look at this post here [x] to see more!

but to love my two taggers am going to say these [x / x] [x] [x] [x] [x] by hanyi (I always love your edits, the colors you choose, the thoughts you put into them (and your humor too!). there are so many cool things you’ve done that I just stay in awe of! I adore all of it ;; ♥) and these [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] by ali (I love all of your gifsets so much, they have such pretty colors and such good scenes, and I am thankful every day that you make all the amazing dmbj content, pls never stop ;; I should go through all of your creations properly one day! I noticed you have sand sea stuff too and let me scream?) ^^ ♥

12. your favorite content creators and blogs that you appreciate: this is going to be a huge list and I’ve already made my love heard for some but no hurt in doing it again so @i-am-just-a-kiddo @ashenwren @tiesanjiao @kholran @lzswy @englishbunnyrocks @leonzhng @aheartfullofjolllly @yibobibo @inkblue-black @cross-d-a @bloody-bee-tea @fytheuntamed @mdzsnet @lifegoesmon @creeds-eagle @underaswift-sunrise @sarawatsaraleo @lan-xichens @mylastbraincql @wangxianbunnydoodles @manhasetardis @distantsnows @ohsehuns @minmoyu @linglynz @highwarlockkareena @yiqiie @aowyn @alienwlw @wangxiians @kingbadcat @sassyassassy @tytangfei @lanzhannnn @skzmxtp @leoyunxi @yoonqiful @softjeon @rapbabenamjoon @ronan-adam @miyakuli @pavusdorian @arsuf @brolinskeep @gawincaskeyy and so many others! (sorry for all the random ppl on this list that I’ve never even talked to ^^’ just know that you make my dash a wonderful place! ♥)

I won’t tag anyone separately here but everyone who’s already been tagged or sees this is free to do this (or link me posts if you’ve done these already!) ♥ have a nice day everyone!

#tag game #wow this took ages #am sorry am late #thanks for tagging me tho!!#i enjoyed this a lot #about me

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etherrealoblivion · 4 years ago

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Someplace We Aren't Supposed To

Spencer Reid x Reader

Summary: Spencer and Y/N have a relatively new relationship. Wanting to explore some more kinks, the prospect of the bathroom on the jet is far too enticing to pass up.

tags: smut, jet sex, hair pulling, exhibitionism kink, daddy kink, Dom!Spencer

A/N: i binge wrote this for this request. enjoy!

RATING: EXPLICIT

Words: 2,115

MASTERLIST

Everyone on the jet was fast asleep. Everyone except you and Spencer Reid.

Your boyfriend was quietly muttering to himself and flipping through a very thick book entitled, Match Wits With Mensa. He’d been reading it and rereading it a lot lately. When you’d asked him about it, he’d gone into a rant about how one needs to keep their brain alert and to do that, one needs to challenge oneself.

By your count, he was on his… sixth? seventh? reread of the book, eyebrows drawn together tightly and silently arguing with whatever he was reading.

“....well, how the heck do you expect to gain knowledge of the correct pattern? You can’t!” he muttered, a little louder than anything else you’d managed to hear. Every now and then he’d scoff and say, “Well, that’s just not right.”

Dating Spencer Reid was… interesting. In many, many ways. One of the most prominent being the pleasant surprise as to how he behaved in bed.

You weren’t sure exactly what you’d been expecting, but it sure as hell wasn’t what you’d got.

Spencer was, in the best possible way, dominant as fuck. When you’d first had sex, you were shocked to find he had much more fun being on top and pinning you down than the reverse of that.

But, other than him being a little commanding usually, your sex life was rather normal. Could having sex four times be considered a sex life? Sure it could, because even though you hadn’t done it all that much, each time was more amazing than the last.

Although… something had been rattling around your head since the last time you’d done it. After you’d both finished, he’d turned to you and said, “Maybe next time we can try something new?”

“Oh? Like what?” you asked enthusiastically.

“Um. I was maybe thinking… doing it someplace we aren’t supposed to?”

“Uhhh. I’m not sure if I’m ready for that, Spencer. My ass is sore enough already.”

“No!” he’d yelped, realizing how what he’d said sounded. “No, no, no. I meant more like… a physical place that’s more exciting? I don’t know, it’s weird.”

You’d been so delighted at him sharing his slightly kinker side, even more so at the prospect of actually exploring it.

“Okay! I think I’d really like to try that! Maybe next time we have time off, we can find somewhere we’d both be comfortable?”

“Wait, really?” his face went blank and you’d felt his spent cock perk up slightly.

“Yes,” you chuckled. “Maybe this weekend? If we don’t get a case, of course.”

And then the stupid phone had rung, pulling you from domestic bliss for three whole weeks to downtown Atlanta.

Now, though, you were safely on the plane home, excited to finally be able to relax. But still, an intrusive thought was wiggling around in your head and the more you tried to ignore it, the louder it got.

After several minutes, you set your own book down and looked at your oblivious boyfriend.

“Hey, Spencer?”

“Hmm?” he hummed back from behind his book.

“I was thinking about something we talked about a while back….”

“Mmhmm.”

You smiled, excited to see what his reaction to your proposal would be.

“And I figured we’re in a plane, yeah?”

“Mmhmm,” he muttered, flipping a page.

“And I’ve racked my brain this whole ride so far, trying to come up with a place more exciting than an airplane bathroom.”

“Huh?” he set his book down, head tilting ever so slightly to the right as it did when he was confused. Then, his whole face dropped, realization dawning on him and you had to suppress a chortle.

“Oh…. You mean....? Are you suggesting that we… um…”

Holding your hands up defensively, you smirked and slowly stood up.

“I’m not suggesting anything. In fact, now that everyone’s asleep,” you said with a pointed look around the plane, “I think I’ll use the bathroom. See you soon.”

And you walked away, making sure to sway your hips a little more prominently, and stepping into the tiny airplane bathroom.

There was a very big possibility that Spencer wouldn’t follow you. He wasn’t exactly the type to hook up in an airplane bathroom. Although, he was the one who’s brought up getting a little riskier in the first place.

The door slid open suddenly and Spencer was inside, quickly locking the door behind him and turning around.

He opened his mouth, no doubt to spout off facts about the numbers of injuries and risks involved in what you were about to do, but your lips were on his before he got a chance to share any of them.

Moaning quietly at the feeling, you ripped off his shirt as he quickly pulled yours over your head along with your bra.

“God,” he gasped, hands instantly grabbing your chest, massaging your breasts lightly as you continued to kiss.

Slipping a hand down his pants, you muttered against his mouth, “I need you, Spencer,” as your hand coiled around his cock.

He was already so hard. Presumably just from the anticipation of this.

Filling your voice with all the love you could manage, you groaned into his ear, “Fuck me!”

With that command, he spun you around, one hand flying to your hair and shoving you down so you were bent over the tiny sink. He shoved up your skirt and yanked your panties down in one fluid motion with the other hand.

You could hear him unbuckling his belt and he leaned in to whisper in your ear, the hairs on the back of your neck pricking up at the feeling.

“Oh, I’m gonna fuck you. Look at you…. Bent over like the cheap little whore that you are. Begging for me to give you what you so desperately want. I bet you like how I’m holding you down, taking control. Tell me, how bad do you want this, huh?”

He pressed the head of his cock against your entrance and you fluttered at the pressure. You needed him bad.

“So, so bad! Spencer!! Pleeeaassee!” you whimpered softly, forehead pressing against the hard plastic of the counter.

With a sharp tug of your hair, he lifted your head so you could see how you looked: makeup smeared, mouth hanging open, and utterly and completely wrecked. What really took the cake was the sight of Spencer holding you down, one hand in your hair and the other on your waist, arching your back.

Sometimes, especially in the heat of the moment, you would forget how young he was.

“Then take it, little girl,” and he shoved into you in one smooth thrust, a sharp gasp leaving your lips before you could suppress it.

His hand snaked around your mouth and held it shut as he slowly pulled back out and filled you again.

“Shhhh,” he chided, increasing the intensity of his thrusts. “You don’t want everyone to hear you, do you?”

You moaned around his hand as he continued to pound into you.

“Oh? Maybe you do?” he leaned forward again, briefly biting your ear before whispering: “Maybe you want to wake up everyone on the plane so that they know how you liked to get fucked. So that they know who you belong to.”

“Mmm,” you moaned, attempting to show him how much you were enjoying this.

He quickly withdrew his hand and you bit your lip in fear of making too much noise. While the idea of everyone knowing what was happening was hot, it wasn’t something you wanted to tempt.

“What’s that?” Spencer grunted, yanking your hair harder and harder with each shove into you. “Say it, little girl. Say who owns you.”

“You! Fuck! You, Spencer!”

“Say it,” he commanded, teeth biting down on your shoulder harshly. “Say my fucking name.”

You could feel the heat rising in the pit of your stomach as he gained speed and depth, getting rougher and rougher with you, practically yanking you back onto him regularly.

“Spencer! Fuck! Spencer!”

Uh oh.

That was definitely louder than you thought it was. You reeeeally hoped these walls were somewhat soundproof.

Spencer, however, was losing composure, a sight you loved to see in the mirror. His mouth was dropped open, forming a tight ‘O’ shape, his eyes were shut tightly and his eyebrows so furrowed. He’d taken off his glasses. When did he do that?

You could tell he was close. He always started to ramble the closer he got to coming. But you weren’t worried, you were right there with him.

“You fucking love taking my cock like a little slut. I can feel your goddamn cunt fluttering around my fucking dick. You like this? You like watching me as I fuck into you from behind in a cheap fucking bathroom? You wanna watch me come inside you, fill up your little hole? Fuck! You’re such a good little slut for Daddy.”

At that last word, your eyes snapped shut and you felt the familiar burst of flames licking their way up your body as you came apart underneath him, forced to watch yourself the whole time.

Spencer’s thrust quickly became erratic at the sensation of you coming around him and with a few more thrusts you felt him fill you up completely, staying firmly inside for a few minutes.

When he finally pulled out, one of his hands stayed on your hip to hold you still so he could watch his come slowly slide out of you and down your thighs. Intrigued, he swiped a finger over your sore hole and played with the juices there, gently rubbing them into your skin.

“You okay?”

His voice was so soft, so tender. So… Spencer.

“Yeah!” you gasped, standing up very carefully and pulling up your panties, hoping the plane would land soon. “Very, very much yes.”

You smiled warmly at him and he returned it, redressing himself and slipping his glasses back on his nose.

“I’m sorry about the, uh… Well… I don’t really know where that came from…”

“The, um… the thing you called yourself at the end?”

He blushed, a strange circumstance due to what you’d just done.

“Yeah. That.”

“Spencer,” you pulled his face up to meet yours quickly. A worried expression was on his face that you needed to rectify quickly. “I don’t mind that. Actually… I’m very curious to explore that. If you want?”

His face lit up and somehow, that was more pleasurable than the orgasm he’d just given you.

“Really?”

“Yeah! Yeah, I think that could be fun! There’s lots of stuff I’m excited to try with you.”

“Me too.”

The two of you held each other for a bit longer before Spencer left the bathroom, you staying behind just in case someone had woken up.

You exited moments later after adjusting your hair and makeup so you looked presentable enough and sat down across from your boyfriend, a pleased expression on your face.

Spencer, however, was a shade of bright red.

“You okay?” you asked softly, taking his hand across the table.

He shook his head and, avoiding eye-contact, jerked it towards the other end of the plane.

You swiveled around and your stomach dropped.

There, chuckling softly, was a very awake Prentiss and Morgan, the latter of which wolf-whistled once you made eye-contact.

Shit.

“Fuck!” you turned back to Spencer. “Did they see you leave the bathroom?”

You wouldn’t have thought it possible, but Spencer somehow turned redder.

“They… they were both in the kitchen, just outside.”

“Oh my god…. How much did they—”

“Too much!” Morgan hollered from the back, a smile in his tone that you wanted to slap out of him. “Too much, lover girl!”

And you heard Emily chortle and the unmistakable sound of a high-five.

Spinning around, a surge of boldness washed over you and for some unearthly reason, the words left your mouth before you could think them through.

“We’ll make sure to be a lot louder next time, then.”

That sure as hell knocked the pleased expressions off their faces, Spencer included.

“What?” you asked innocently. “It’s their fault for listening. I’m not ashamed.”

But Spencer simply swallowed and said, “Next time?”

You looked up at him, smiling at the way he twitched his nose and how that shifted his glasses. He was so beautiful. And he was all yours. And you were all his.

“Oh yeah. Next time,” you said, winking at him.

As the plane landed and everyone departed, you swore you heard Morgan mutter to Prentiss, “Remind me to buy earmuffs.”

Poor Morgan. For the stuff you and Spencer were gonna do, he’d need a whole noise-canceling system.

A/N: i’ll edit this a bit better tmr I just wanted to post it now.

TAGLIST

@whollytaciturn @101donuts @thegingerfairchild @safertokiss @happyiidiot @cielo1984 @thupidalethea @darkacademiacherry @matthewreid @aloha-ashley-taylor @justchiara-02 @spnobsessedmemes @sweet-darlin @matthewreid @brokenanxiety @thatsonezesty13 @psychedellic-phase @beautifulalmondstudentduck @awhollandx @baddreamsandbrokenhearts @simp-for-mgg @swagdaddycam @gejatume @url-under-construction @radkryptonitepeanut @idontneedalltheseemotions @krymson182 @addie5264 @pinkdiamond1016

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ptersparkers · 5 years ago

Text

angel (chilling adventures of sabrina)

summary: as the only pure mortal in the fright club, there seems to be an influx of interesting things happening in greendale that you are unaware of. a certain prince of hell happens to find that interesting.

warnings: typos, probably.

a/n: ummm maybe i binge watched caos this past week and maybe i’ve fallen in love. i’ll let you figure that out. also this is my first time writing for caos (and not marvel, lol) so let me know what you think!!’ pls give feedback thank u.

add yourself to my tasglist!

ps: this gif is mine so if you use it, please credit!

When all was said and done, Sabrina and Caliban had come to amicable terms regarding the shared responsibility of ruling Hell.

It didn’t take much convincing for Caliban to relinquish his prior ambition after learning his rule would end within a day, as the Pagans would have defeated him and taken Earth for themselves. Sabrina’s ability to show him the time loop she was once trapped in gave him a reason to quit the fighting and rule Hell on an equal scale, no questions asked.

Plus, he started to like the bleach blonde witch.

You, on the other hand, felt like you had missed out on the most important plot piece of the greatest film of all time.

While Harvey, Theo, and Roz had known about Sabrina’s secret since her sixteenth birthday, you were left in the dust about the shenanigans that went on around Greendale. You were truly the only mortal with no magic or witch ties, but the other four couldn’t say the same. Sabrina was a witch, Theo’s ancestor Dorothea often visited him in time of need, Harvey’s family had a history of witch hunting (which he does not partake), and Roz’s ability to foreshadow the future with a simple touch proved to be more useful than she had originally thought.

You were a mortal. A regular high school student whose biggest problems were studying for four AP classes every day while balancing cheerleading and other extracurriculars.

It wasn’t until recently that the strangeness came to light. What the Fright Club had failed to mention was that Sabrina had continuously hexed you in order to keep you out of harm’s way by leaving a small bag filled with her Aunt Hilda’s concoctions in your bedroom. It worked its magic when you slept, an invisible blanket covering your eyes that made their strange disappearances seem normal.

But it seems like that hex was fading. Sabrina neglected to change it out every other week due to being preoccupied by Caliban’s yearning, the Dark Lord’s agenda, and Lilith’s drama regarding Hell. Now you sat with wonder and couldn’t help but feel left out of a great adventure that your friends embarked on.

A month had passed since Sabrina and Caliban had made amends. You grew to understand the nature of it and the four filled you in on all you had missed with a guilt hanging over their heads. It was hard to hear and understand, but ultimately you couldn’t hate your best friends for wanting to keep you safe.

You knew not to question Sabrina’s whereabouts if you weren’t able to find her because she was most likely taking care of business down below. You still had yet to meet Caliban and the only information you gathered from him was what the gang caught you up on and Sabrina’s grievances whenever she felt annoyed by him.

“You know, this is all a weird concept,” you said. “I mean, I guess I always had my faith and doubt kept me guessing about what’s really out there, and it’s really out there,” you said, stealing a fry from Theo’s plate. The five of you sat in Dr. Cerberus’s diner and decided you weren’t going to do anything that wasn’t normal for teenagers.

“It still creeps me out,” Harvey admitted. “Hell was worse than I could’ve imagined.”

“Caliban’s got things under control and Lilith’s doing just fine being an advisor,” Sabrina said. “I don’t think she’s mad about the ruling situation anymore. Lucifer’s still doing his bidding but I think they’ve reconnected.”

“That’s...good?”

Sabrina chuckled. “Trust me, it’ll take some getting used to.”

“That is an absolute understatement.”

The door to the diner chimed while you fished inside of your purse for a quarter.

“I’m gonna go pick out a song, any requests?”

“You’re the music genius,” said Roz. You smiled and walked towards the front of the diner.

As you approached the machine and put the quarter inside of the slot, a tall man with sand colored hair loomed over you and watched.

“Can I help you?” you asked.

“Not really. Just observing.” You quirked an eyebrow, not recognizing his face despite knowing everyone in the small town.

“You’re not from here, are you?” you asked.

He chuckled. “Is it that obvious?”

“Greendale’s a pretty small town. It’s easy to spot someone who’s not a local,” you replied.

“Well in that case, I’m not from around these parts. Far from, actually.” He looked at your hand and then the juke box. “What song are you choosing?”

You pried your gaze away from him to look back at the machine and put the coin in the slot, choosing “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough” before looking back at him.

“Satisfied?”

The handsome stranger looked at you and didn’t try to hide the face that he was checking you out by letting his eyes look at your body up and down. Not that you minded.

“Very,” he said with a sail try voice before walking around the corner. “The name’s Caliban.”

“Y/N,” you replied. You raised your eyebrow before walking back to the other four and sat down in your previous seat only for the handsome stranger to approach the table.

“Caliban,” Sabrina greeted. “What a lovely surprise.”

“Nice choice,” Roz commented, hearing the song play throughout the diner.

“That’s Caliban, as in the Caliban?” you asked.

“It’s good to know you lot have been talking about me,” he said, crossing his hands over his chest. “I decided to take a break from, you know, and come see what you love so much about Greendale.”

“She knows about Hell,” said Sabrina.

“Funny how I’ve never seen her there, or anywhere with you four, as a matter of fact,” Caliban replied.

“It’s a long story,” you said, sipping on your chocolate milkshake. “Not an important one, though.”

“Contrary,” he began. “You’re the first purely true mortal I’ve met in Hell or otherwise with no ancestral ties to witches or greater magic. That’s pretty important to me.” You blushed, not knowing what to say or do next.

“Is there a reason you’re here?” Harvey asked with a slight attitude. Caliban shifted his focus from you to him, which made your body relax a little bit.

“I didn’t come here for business or to whisk Sabrina away, if that’s what you’re wondering. I’m just here to see what makes Greendale so special, though I think I’m starting to see why.” Caliban spared no expense and was not shy about looking in your direction as he spoke his last statement.

“Don’t even think about it,” Sabrina said sternly. “You are not going to get any ideas, are you?”

Caliban chuckled and put his hands up in defense. “Whatever you say, Sabrina.” He began to walk away but not before turning around and winking at you. “See you around.”

Caliban walked out the door and you didn’t bother asking where he was going next.

“Dear Satan, he’s so annoying,” Sabrina said, exasperated. “It’s like he’s made it his personal mission to make my life, well, a living Hell for lack of a better term.”

“At least he’s not hellbent on defeating you anymore,” Theo reasoned. “I think he’s trying to get to know you a little bit better.”

“And he’s doing it by flirting with my best friend?” Sabrina asked. She put her head on your shoulder and and ate a fry from her plate. “You know I love you, right?”

“Mhm.”

“I’m not saying you need to stay away from Caliban, but you need to be careful around him. At least until we’ve worked together long enough for me to trust him completely.”

“Loud and clear, Brina,” you said. “I still can’t really wrap my head around this whole thing. I can’t watch horror films about Hell and witches the same ever again.”

The Fright Club laughed.

“It’ll take some getting used to,” Harvey said. “I mean, I was pretty apprehensive at first. Remember when Brina and I broke up and I spent every day at your place after school?” You nodded. “That’s when she told me she was a witch. It was kind of hard to wrap my head around until everything with the Pagans and angels happened.” You nodded, soaking in his words. “Anyway, there’s nothing wrong with feeling like you don’t understand. I don’t even understand most of it, if I’m being completely honest.”

“In think that’s enough food for me,” said Roz who pushed her plate to the middle. “Seeing Hell with my own eyes really suppressed my appetite.”

”Oh, shoot,” you said, looking at the clock mounted on the wall. “I have to head home and help my mom. I promised her I’d help clean the kitchen and I’ve got to be home in ten minutes. Can I pay you guys back?”

“Don’t worry about it. See you tomorrow?” said Theo.

“Count on it!”

***

You saw Caliban not long after your first encounter with him. The idea of him being the ruler of Hell (alongside Sabrina) was still a hard concept to understand and you weren’t quite sure if you were supposed to bow in his presence or not.

“Unnecessary,” he said when you asked. Caliban sat across from you at the local coffee shop, offering to walk you when you had caught his eye. You harbored a hot latte and he held a blueberry scone in his hand. “I think you mortals like that glory.”

You shrugged. “Can’t argue with that.”

“Hell doesn’t have formalities when it comes to celebration other than referring to each other by one’s title,” he explained. “It’s just easier that way.”

“You make it seem like Hell’s a relaxed place to be.”

He pinched a piece of his scone off at put it in his mouth, smirking at your statement.

“Oh, far from it. As righteous as demons are, we’re not that shallow.”

“It’s kind of hard to believe you’re made out of clay,” you said, taking a sip of your latte.

“Why do you say that?”

“I dunno,” you said. You reached over the table to poke his bicep. “You seem so real. So human.”

Normally, Caliban would’ve been offended by such a comparison. But he smiled.

“I suppose. I don’t question my creation. I accept it and try to live as adventurously as I can.”

“I hope to,” you said. “Getting out of Greendale, I mean. It’s my biggest dream.”

“You’d want to leave this town?” he asked.

“Well, yeah,” you replied. “I have nothing going for me here. I’m powerless and there’s no reason for me to stay where I’m not needed.”

To his surprise, Caliban felt his heart jolt at your comment. He was wordless for a moment.

“Where will you go?”

“I don’t know,” you said. “Maybe somewhere on the west coast. Maybe I’ll still be in New England. College is the perfect opportunity to explore the world and come back home for a few weeks at a time.”

“This is where Lucifer fell, you know,” said Caliban. “The sacred place is hidden deep in the woods where there’s a clearing of rocks and stone. That’s why this place is driven by witches of the Church of Night.”

“I still can’t believe the Devil is walking among us,” you said, shaking your head. “My mom used to force me to go to Sunday school, and I suppose I did have faith. It’s all meta now.”

“Are you still a believer?” he asked.

“I kind of have to be, considering you’re here.”

Caliban smiled.

“Do Heaven and Hell ever interact withe each other?”

“Not exactly,” he began. “We’re on civil relations but don’t want anything to do with each other. They stay up there so long as we stay down here. I’ve never encountered an angel before.”

“You haven’t?”

“They aren’t allowed to come down to Earth unless absolutely necessary,” he explained. “Not really sure why but it’s one of their more important rules.”

“I think I have a headache,” you teased. All of this knowledge about celestial beings truly made your senses adapt to your surroundings in Greendale and you were more than aware of the fact that God was real.

“I should go,” Caliban said, standing up. “I need to escort some souls back to Hell and send some up north.”

“You mean not all souls who are sold to the Devil go to Hell?”

“Sabrina and I negotiated that,” he said. “No more soul-selling. The ones that preexist will be discussed by her and I, and we decide if the punishment is worth the crime. I don’t think someone who sold their soul for a good cause needs to spend all eternity down in Hell. That’s why she comes down there all the time.”

“Huh,” you said at a loss for words.

Caliban smiled. “I’ll see you around, princess.”

***

The next time you see Caliban was with the rest of the Fright Club. He was wearing a linen button down with several buttons popped open, exposing his bare chest with black slacks and white sneakers. His hair was tousled and you swore this was the most human you had ever seen him.

“Ambrose is being a little paranoid and wants me to check out the edge of Greendale for threats,” Sabrina said. “I think he’s just worried about me co-ruling Hell while living on Earth. It’s nothing to worry about.”

“You say that like it’s just another day in Greendale,” you said.

Sabrina shrugged. “I mean, it kind of is.”

“Well, do you need us to do anything?” Roz asked.

“I want you to come with me, if that’s okay. Harvey, Theo, and Y/N, you don’t need to come. I’m sure this is Ambrose being Ambrose.”

“Are you sure, Brina?” Harvey asked.

She waved him off. “It’s fine, really. Roz and I will spend a few hours making sure things are normal and we’ll meet back at my place for dinner? Aunt Hilda’s kind of expecting us.”

“Wouldn’t miss it!” Theo said enthusiastically.

Sabrina gave the group one last smile before she took Roz’s hands and teleported out of the room, which left the four of you.

“I can give you a ride, Theo,” Harvey offered before looking at you. “And you too. I don’t mind driving to the other side of town.”

“I can take her home,” Caliban said. Harvey looked at you and Caliban spoke again, noticing his hesitation. “Part of our deal was that I made sure her friends remain unharmed. That includes Y/N.”

Harvey seemed to accepted this answer and grabbed his keys from his pocket before bidding you a goodbye. He and Theo drove off in his truck before you and Caliban left in the opposite direction.

“So, uh, do you want to come in?” you asked, awkwardly standing by the front door after he insisted on walking you in.

“I don’t mind,” he said. You fumbled with the keys before opening the door with a shaky hand and let him inside. It was the first time you were letting a boy into your home (other than Harvey and Theo, but your relationship with them was strictly platonic) and you felt a little more nervous than usual. After figuring out you had liked Caliban more than you originally expected, there was nothing you could do to stop your heart from beating just a little too fast when we he was around. Him being in your house did nothing to help the situation.

As for Caliban, his usual overwhelming desire for a carnal relationship was nowhere to be found when he stepped into your house. He looked at the white walls decorated with family photos and admired the ones with you as a child. Caliban watched as you put the house keys in a glass dish and followed you to your bedroom.

It was odd, Caliban thought, to feel nothing but tranquility. He was almost always hyperaware of his surroundings and wary of demons and souls roaming past him in Hell, but it was just the two of you. Two bodies under one roof.

“My parents won’t be home until later tonight. N-Not that we have to do anything!” you added. “I just mean they’d freak out because they haven’t met you before.”

Caliban chuckled. “I wasn’t planning on making a move, if that’s what you were wondering.”

You didn’t know whether to be relieved or disappointed.

“Your room suits you,” he said. Caliban admired the photos on your nightstand and polaroids pinned to a brown board on the wall filled with memories from your past with the Fright Club and other friends and family members. He saw a stack of books beside your bed and a fish tank sitting by the window, your closet doors closed, and decorative pieces that highlighted your personality.

“Thanks,” you said, laying down on your best. “You can sit, you know.”

Caliban took this opportunity to lay next to you. When you felt the bed dip, you averted your eyes to the ceiling.

“What are you thinking about?” Caliban asked after a long pause of silence.

“How fast life changes,” you replied. “I wouldn’t have it any other way, but with all that I know, how can I keep all of this celestial knowledge a secret from my parents? The world is always doubting Heaven and Hell but I know the truth. I don’t know if being purely mortal is helping me out in this situation either.”

“You’re an innocent,” Caliban said, turning his head to look at you. “So pure and clean. Your soul has been untouched by neither light or night and it’s probably the one thing that’s going to save you in the future.”

You turned your head to meet his gaze. “I’m still powerless.”

“Maybe in one way, but not completely. You have no witchcraft magic but you have intelligence and intuition. You know not to meddle with things that aren’t of your concern.”

You were silent.

“What else are you thinking about?”

“How much I like spending time with you,” you confessed. “But it’s hard, you know. You’ll be in Hell most of the time and you’re made of clay, for crying out loud.” Caliban chuckled. “I didn’t really think you’d be around as often as you are.”

Caliban was silent.

“What are you thinking about?”

“You,” he replied. “I’m always thinking about you. I used to think morality was a disease, but it’s not. It’s a rationale, just like any demonic presence.” Caliban moved closed to you.

“I think about what love is and how I don’t know what it really means.”

“I think love means different things to different people,” you said. “I think it’s mutual respect and loyalty. It’s knowing details about someone, big and small. It’s about being together but knowing you can be independent. Love is hard and it takes time. Love is not instant.”

“You’re pretty wise for an innocent,” he said.

You laughed. “Maybe I’m just a hopeless romantic.”

“Maybe not.”

Caliban lifted his body to hover above yours, your chests barely touching as his eyes gazed right over your lips. You dared not to move and Caliban hesitantly leaned down further so that your lips barely brushed against one another, the goosebumps on your skin taking affect. Because you weren’t pulling away, he took it as a silent signal and pressed his chaste lips against your soft ones.

There was no spark. No magic and no fireworks. There was only you and Caliban, and there was no other way you would’ve wanted your first kiss to feel like. Time slowed down as Caliban relaxed by your touch and your hands roamed his neck. The cold outdoor air was replaced by the warmth of Caliban’s body and when he pulled away, he let his thumb stroke your cheek as he cupped the side of your face.

“You are, dare I say, an angel.

“That’s a compliment, considering I know how much you despise them.”

He laughed. “Perhaps I’ll make an exception.”

Caliban leaned down once more to press a tender kiss to your forehead and you closed your eyes in bliss, happy to accept the good that came with the craziness of the last month. You looked at his structured jaw and grinned at his loving gaze, letting out a tired laugh.

“Perhaps.”

#caliban x reader #caos caliban #caliban #caos caliban x reader #chilling adventures of sabrina #caos x reader #sabrina spellman #my writing #angel

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silverlightqueen · 4 years ago

Text

Filter - Part 2

‘There are so many sides to him, it’s hard to keep track.’

fratboy/jock!Jimin x cheerleader!reader - e2l, smut, a n g s t, comedy, fluff

Part of ficswithluv’s Bulletproof Bingo!

Rating: 18 (graphic sex and mature themes)

Word Count: 16.6k+ (she’s a monster omg I’m so sorry)

Warnings - bad language, humiliation (not during sex - he just embarrasses the hell out of her in public), alcohol, drug consumption, explicit discussion of sex, locker room sex, y/n being a brat again, jimin being a dick again (but worse,,,so much worse), dom!jimin, sub!y/n, teasing, oral sex (m and f receiving), fingering, tit fucking, tit slapping, Jimin’s monster cock makes a return, praise, explicit dirty talk, mild degradation, exhibitionism, semi-public sex, unprotected sex, standing sex, asphyxiation, y/n and jimin argue again (multiple times), Jimin is literally the worst human being on earth in this omg I’m sorry for making him terrible, somehow I ended up putting a comment on society and the patriarchy (?) at the end but we go with it, girl power! and if your kpop boy is in this, he’s trash (unless he’s Stray Kids Minho, the only male character in this that deserves rights)

a/n: unedited lol and this really didn’t go the way it was supposed to, but I don’t hate it so here ya go, enjoy! I think in this lockdown, I’ve really started to,,,,hate men and it shows in this fic so I’m sorry to any boys that might be reading this lmao. but anyway thank you to the loml @silverlightprincess for proofreading this, you’re the best hype girl ever, luv u xoxo (and I promise I’ll work on The Other Half for you and @brinnalaine ) lmk what you think of it, I legit thrive off praise lol x

Read Part 1 first !!!

also I got the banner off google so credit to whoever made it (it has no relevance to the story but it matches the colour scheme so we roll with it lmao)

silverlightqueen masterlist

‘Good afternoon, everyone, and thank you so much for coming. We really appreciate the turn-out, and we’re super excited to see your try-outs! Today is going to be quite simple; we’ll start by speaking to you one-by-one to see the range of movements that you can do. Not everyone on the squad has to be able to fly and tumble, so don’t be worried if you can’t do certain flips or jumps – we try to include people of all abilities as long as the raw talent is there, and you’ll be able to learn a lot if you make the squad. Once we’re aware of what you can do, we’ll group you into smaller groups and teach you a simple routine, a slightly different one for each group. We’ll watch you perform the routine as a group after some practice time, and then we’ll assess your Cheer ability one by one, just a couple flips and jumps and things like that. If you really would rather not do them by yourself, that’s okay. Just let one of the squad know, and we’ll pair you with someone else who feels the same. We understand that some of you may not feel confident enough to perform in front of everyone else by yourselves. And it’s okay if you don’t have much confidence, because that’s something we will work on and help you to improve if you make the squad. Does anybody have any questions?’

Dozens of hopeful faces smile back at me, not one hand rising to ask a question, and I smile back. I was nervous about my first time doing this, speaking in front of everyone as newly elected Cheer Captain, but having the rest of the squad behind me makes me feel better. ‘Okay, great. If you could get into four lines in front of each of the seats at the desk, we’ll get started!’ I say excitedly. Irene, Jisoo, Chen and Jihyo (the most responsible people on the squad) are sat behind the desk to write down what people are able to do, the others on the squad dotted around to help if anyone needs it, and all the people here to try-out head over to the desk. I take a moment to take a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves, and I tilt my head back to feel the sun on my face. The weather’s lovely today, warm and sunny with a slight cool breeze, perfect for cheer try-outs, and the turf of the pitch is healthy and green, not yet ruined by the studs on the bottom of the players’ football boots (training doesn’t start ‘til next week).

‘y/n, relax, babe. Everything’s going well, you did a good job,’ Jennie says from behind me, putting a comforting hand on my shoulder, and I nod. ‘Yeah, I know. It’s just… being Cheer Captain, it’s big boots to fill.’ ‘I know, but you’ve got all of us helping you out. You know we’re all here to support you. Stop stressing yourself out,’ she says, and I turn to smile at her. ‘Thank you, Jen.’ ‘Don’t thank me, because now I’ve got bad news,’ she says, looking reluctant to speak, and I side-eye her. ‘What?’ ‘We have spectators.’ ‘We always have spectators.’ ‘That’s not what I meant,’ she says, turning me to look over to the bleachers which are a few metres away. And when I spot a group of ASP boys sat there, watching us and waving when I look over, my heart nearly stops. ‘You’ve got to be fucking kidding,’ I mutter, putting my hand up to shield my eyes from the sun and see them properly. And of course he’s there. Of course he is.

I haven’t seen him since a week ago today, when I ran out of his room while he was fast asleep and did the most talked about ‘Walk of Shame’ at school in the past year. All week, everyone’s been talking about me and Jimin, and somehow the rumours have spiralled out of control. My friends have reported back that they’ve heard that Hoseok and Namjoon joined us when they walked in on us, that I left before Jimin could finish, that I cried and begged him to let me cum (which my friends have denied on my part despite it being kinda true) and that I left wearing no underwear and flashed everyone on my way out. And that’s not even the worst of the rumours. I’ve tried not to comment on it when people have asked me, and it seems Jimin’s stayed quiet too – I’m sure it would’ve been hot news if he’d said anything.

I woke up the next morning aching, my entire body sore and weak (I really have no idea how I managed to leave the frat house on my feet – it must have been the adrenaline). My neck, jaw and chest were covered in purpling marks, some of them in the shape of his rings, and my waist and ass were covered in dark painful bruises from his tight grip and the endless spanking (the marks and bruises are all still there, by the way, fading but there – I had to cake the makeup on top of them this morning to cover them in my skimpy cheer kit). It hurt to sit down for too long, but it hurt to walk too, so I spent all of Sunday lying down, Jennie nursing me back to health (as she calls it – in reality, she just microwaved some soup for me, and we binge-watched Netflix in bed together). My body isn’t used to intense sex like that because not many university boys are as good at sex as Jimin is. I hate to admit it, but I’ve been zoning out all week (during lectures and seminars, when I was with my friends, at the gym, whilst studying or watching TV, when I was trying to fall in sleep, whilst showering, etc.) thinking back to mind. And I hate it – I hate him. I used to think of him with irritation and borderline rage, but now… the thought of him turns me on. It’s infuriating. I haven’t even gone over to get my stuff – not even my favourite bra (it was sexy and comfy, lacy with no underwire) – for fear of falling back under his stupid spell and getting into his bed again.

When my eyes meet his, it’s like he knows that I’m wet, a small smirk playing at his glossy lips as he runs a vascular hand through his jet-black locks, silver rings glinting in the sunlight. He looks fucking gorgeous, in a pair of loose black slacks and a loose orange shirt, a simple but flattering outfit, with his silver earrings, rings and bracelets. And the irritation inside me pushes down the arousal, and I turn away angrily, hearing their laughter over my shoulder as my eyes meet Jennie’s. ‘I can go speak to them if you want?’ she offers weakly, and I sigh. ‘There’s nothing we can say; they’re allowed to be here. We’re just gonna have to ignore them,’ I say, and she nods, throwing an arm over my shoulders and leading me towards the table.

I oversee the proceedings, making sure everything’s going well, my mind still elsewhere, but after a few minutes, the noise they’re making is unbearable. They’re loud – laughter and shouting echoing around the pitch – and it’s starting to distract the squad, and the people here to try-out. ‘Should I go tell them to shut up?’ Jennie asks, and I nod, reluctant to go over myself. She walks over, hands on her hips, and I know she’s gonna give them hell. But then I start to doubt that when I see them laughing and joking with her, before she comes back over, my expectant gaze being met by her sheepish one. ‘Well?’ I ask, and she winces. ‘They said they don’t take orders from me – only from… the Cheer Captain,’ she says slowly, and I let out a noise of irritation. Jimin being an annoying, difficult, stupid dickhead, I can understand. The others? I thought they were my friends. But obviously they find this whole situation more amusing than anything. It’s not funny for me – I slept with the guy I’m supposed to hate the most! The guy that I do hate the most.

‘I really don’t want to go over there,’ I admit, and Jennie’s eyes soften with sympathy. ‘You don’t have to, y/n, don’t feel pressured. We can cope with their noise – it’s fine, babe,’ she says reassuringly, but I feel guilty. I remember how nervous I was at try-outs, and having a group of rowdy frat boys laughing and shouting every few seconds definitely wouldn’t have helped. It’s up to me as Captain to create a comfortable environment, and with them around, this isn’t comfortable at all. I sigh, shaking my head, before I say, ‘I’ll go.’ ‘Are you sure?’ she asks, and I nod, dread building up inside me. ‘Want me to come with?’ ‘No, you just stay and keep an eye on things.’

I begin walking over, eyes fixed on the ground, and I can literally feel their eyes on me, their anticipation practically palpable. Everyone sat around the pitch is whispering, watching, desperate to see Jimin and I interact after all the rumours of the last week, and I can feel it all, making my nerves build up with every step. When I’m a few feet away from the bleachers, I look up, my eyes instantly meeting his, and I stop, staring at them for a moment. He’s endlessly amused, the smirk on his lips unbearably irritating. ‘Hey, y/n,’ he says easily, a ripple of laughter running around the group, and I don’t reply, matching his light gaze with a hard stare of my own. ‘This isn’t funny, guys, and I would’ve thought you’d know better. How do you think they’re gonna feel when they’re doing their routines and you morons are laughing? None of you can do what they’re doing, not in a million years, so don’t you dare come and sit here to rub my personal life in my face without even thinking of how rude and disruptive you’re being. You should be ashamed,’ I say neutrally, not letting any emotion into my voice, because if I do, I’ll lose my temper completely like I did last week and end up screaming at them. The other boys have the courtesy to look embarrassed of themselves, but Jimin just continues to smirk at me, running his thumb over his plump lips. My insides churn with anger at him being such a dick, but I don’t say a thing, waiting for one of them to reply. ‘Sorry, y/n. We didn’t think,’ Jin says, apologetic, and the others mutter apologies too, all except Jimin. ‘Don’t apologise. Just shut up,’ I reply before turning on my heel, walking away and ignoring the indiscernible whispers and stifled laughter.

‘Whatever you said, it definitely worked,’ Jennie says, and I nod curtly, still pissed off. ‘You okay?’ she asks, and my shoulders slump. ‘No. I’m supposed to be the Captain, I’m supposed to be nice and smiley and kind, and now I’m just angry, because of them, because of him,’ I sigh tiredly, and Jen looks at me sadly before putting an arm around my shoulders. ‘Don’t let them get you worked up, babe – today’s important, okay? Just focus on the try-outs,’ Jennie says, and I nod, trying my best to let my annoyance go, but it’s easier said than done. I wait impatiently for the first part of today to be done, desperate to have something to do so I can distract myself. And as soon as the last person has finished speaking to Jisoo, I call for everyone’s attention, telling them to start warming up. I sit down with Irene, Jisoo, Jihyo and Chen, and we quickly put people in similar-ability groups, based on the notes that the four of them have made whilst speaking to them; potential flyers, bases and spotters, and tumblers. The routines aren’t too different – just to test their dancing ability, and to see if they have the kind of body control needed for their different positions.

Once we’ve grouped them, Irene reads out the groups, the flyers with Lisa and Seulgi, bases and spotters with Kai, and tumblers with Momo, the rest of the squad supporting. I take a seat at the desk, making notes on people who catch my eye (they’re all wearing little name stickers, so I send Jennie over to find out their names). Jiwon, the pretty sophomore from last week, is really good – her dancing is great, and she’s light on her feet, the perfect flyer. I’m already certain she’ll make the team, because she’s super smiley and energetic too (I wave at her when I catch her eye, and she waves back excitedly, huge smile on her face). Watching them all learning the dances, making notes, evaluating them, it gets me in the zone. Focusing on this, I’m in my Captain mindset, having completely forgotten about the stupid disruption earlier. There’s definitely some potential here, and I have no doubt we’ll do really well at Nationals this year – I’ll be pissed if we don’t come first (and I’ll also be the first Captain in ten years that doesn’t lead us to victory, which is a pretty big deal).

Once they’ve learnt their dances, we split each group in half so there are less people to focus on, and they perform the dances to us. They’re all quite good – there’s a couple people who, bless them, will definitely not make the team, and I feel bad, but I have to be ruthless. It’s my job to make sure I give us the best chance at winning. We give them a little break after they’ve performed, and we all sit together to compare notes. We’ve pretty much all put the same people down, but we can’t make any final decisions until we watch them do their Cheer moves. ‘Okay, is everybody ready?’ I ask after getting their attention. ‘We’re going to have a look at your moves now. So they’re pretty basic, nothing too strenuous. Can someone show them what they’ve got to do?’ I say, turning to face the squad, and before anyone can speak, Kai says, ‘y/n, you should. You’re the captain after all.’ I return his mischievous grin with a hard stare, but the others all give various agreements, pushing me to show them. ‘I haven’t even warmed up,’ I mutter, everyone laughing.

‘Okay, we’ll start with a basic standing split. So, you just lift your leg, whichever your better leg is, and bring it right up like this, with your arm in front of it, and hold it there for a few seconds,’ I say, my left leg up against my body, my right arm holding my foot above my head. It’s a little painful because I haven’t warmed up, but I’ve done this move enough times that it’s pretty easy. I hear applause a little distance away, knowing it’s those stupid boys, and then everyone trying out starts clapping too, making me drop my leg and laugh embarrassedly. ‘Okay, thanks, guys, you can stop now,’ I say lightly, and everyone starts laughing. I show them all of the other moves – a full split, a pike jump, a toe touch jump, a hurdler jump, a front flip, a back flip and an aerial, getting applause for each movement, triggered by our idiot spectators. ‘So we’ll call you up one-by-one, unless you’ve asked us to go with someone else, and we’d like you to a show us a clasp, a high V, a T motion, and then go into the moves that you’re confident with. Show us your personality – we want bright and bubbly people on the squad, so don’t be afraid to chant or whatever, if you want to,’ I say as I take my seat behind the desk, Irene, Chen, Jihyo, Jisoo and Jennie sat with me, the rest of the squad sat around on the grass, enjoying the warmth and just watching the proceedings.

After a couple of people, it starts to get repetitive, but I remain focused, knowing I need to pay attention to differentiate between the good and the great. Jiwon is fantastic – she’s making the team without a doubt. Once they’re all done (nearly two hours later), I call them all over to sit beside the desk. ‘Thank you all so much for coming, and well done. What you did takes a lot of courage and you should all be so proud of yourselves, whether you make the squad or not. We’ve got your details from earlier, so we’ll be in contact within the next couple days to let you know if you made it. Thank you, and you are free to go,’ I smile, all of them letting out expressions of gratitude as they get up, heading to the bleachers to get their stuff and go. ‘Jiwon!’ I call, the girl turning to look. ‘Can I have a word?’ I say, the girl telling her friends to wait for her as she walks towards me. I head over to her, and we meet in the middle of the pitch, with no-one around. I don’t want anyone to hear and accuse me of favouritism.

‘Hey, y/n.’ ‘Hi, Jiwon. You did a really good job, definitely shone through. You’re fantastic,’ I say, and she smiles shyly. ‘Thank you. I have been cheering for a long time, though, so I did have an advantage,’ she says humbly, and I wave it off. ‘Don’t give me excuses – just accept the compliment. Anyway, I probably shouldn’t say this, but you caught a lot of our eyes, Jiwon. I’m pretty certain you’ll make the squad. First practice is next Saturday, 2 ‘til 4, and we’re just gonna do an introductory session, get to know one another and have a proper look at what everyone can do. Make sure you’re on time, and ready to try out some stunts. And work on your pike jump over the week – your fingers were literally millimetres away from your toes. A little practice, and you’ll have it perfect. And you were the teeniest bit wobbly in your standing split, so just work on your balance a little,’ I say, and she nods enthusiastically, taking in every word. Whilst I’m speaking, I notice Jimin approaching us, and Jiwon does too, looking flustered when she spots him. But she sees the way I ignore him completely, and does the same, just listening to me.

‘Thank you, y/n, I really appreciate it. Also, can I ask for your advice about something?’ she asks, and I nod, surprised she wants my advice. Jimin is now stood right beside us, but neither of us pay attention to his presence, keeping our eyes on each other. ‘What do you do to warm up for your splits? I warm up, but it’s always painful when I do them, and you did them really well, so I thought I’d ask.’ ‘I do a lot of yoga, actually, which really helps. We always get here around twenty minutes before practice, and the others do laps and things like that to warm up, but I do a bit of yoga, which helps loosen my body a lot. And then, just before I start a routine, I bend in half, and hold my head against my shins for like half a minute, to loosen my legs. It’s a little painful, but it gets your legs ready for the stretch that you feel when you’re in the splits,’ I say, and she listens eagerly to every word. His presence is starting to bother me, especially the way he’s completely silent, a stupid smirk on his face. ‘Thank you, y/n. I’m gonna head off now, but thanks for the advice. Are you going to KPN’s party tonight?’ she asks, and I sigh, thinking back to the text invite that Jackson from Kappa Phi Nu sent out a couple days ago. ‘I’m not sure. I was gonna just head to the gym for a late-night workout but Jennie’s trying to convince me to go,’ I explain, and she nods. ‘Well, I hope you do come. It’d be nice to see you there,’ she says, and I smile at her, touched. And then I lose my patience, turning to him with annoyance, and he grins, draping his arms around our waists.

‘My two favourite girls,’ he says with a grin, making me want to slap him, and we both push his arms off us in disgust, moving away from him slightly. ‘Look at you two. Best friends now, huh? If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t even know each other, so I think a ‘thank you’ is in order,’ he says smugly, my eyes widening at him as Jiwon shoots him a dirty look. God, I love this girl. ‘Fuck you, Park,’ I say without thinking, and his eyes sparkle, mischief in his grin as he replies, ‘I already did, babe, keep up.’ And then he reaches into his back pocket, pulling his hand back out with something black and lacy hanging off his finger. My favourite bra. ‘Remember? You left this?’ ‘Park!’ I hiss, grabbing it from his hand and panicking for a moment, not sure where to put it (my cheer kit doesn’t have pockets) before I tuck it into his front pocket hastily. It’s too late, though, because everyone in the area who was watching saw it, laughter rippling around us. ‘I would’ve brought your pants too, but they were ripped, so I figured there was no point,’ he says, and I give him an angry stare, jaw hurting from how hard I’m clenching it. He just grins back, Jiwon looking between us for a few seconds before she says, ‘my friends are waiting for me, y/n, so I’m gonna go. I hope to see you later.’ ‘Okay, Jiwon. See you. Remember to work on your pike jump, and your standing splits. If you get here early, we can do some yoga together,’ I say, trying to push down the humiliation as the girl nods with a smile before she goes to join her friends who are watching us. Everyone’s watching us.

‘Your standing splits were good,’ he says, and I sigh, rolling my eyes. ‘I’m literally giving you a compliment!’ ‘I don’t care, you fucking dick.’ ‘Wow, never mind. I was gonna say that I could put your flexibility to good use, but forget it,’ he says, failing to hold back his grin, and I narrow my eyes at him. ‘Why the fuck did you come, Park? I thought I made it clear last week that I’m not interested in you,’ I say harshly, hurt momentarily appearing on his face before he masks it with a smirk, making me feel a little guilty. ‘We always come to watch try-outs. Entertainment for a couple hours. And it doesn’t hurt seeing you in this kit either,’ he says, taking the hem of my skirt into his hand, fingers momentarily skimming against my thigh, and I slap his hand away, feeling exposed in my kit all of a sudden. It’s quite revealing – a short blue skirt with a white border and a long-sleeved blue cropped top with shoulder cut-outs, with our school name written across the chest in white. It’s super cute though, even more so with the white pumps and frilly white ankle socks, and the blue and white bows on our ponytails. The boys wear the same colour scheme, blue and white t-shirts and shorts.

‘I swear to God, Park, I’m not in the mood for your bullshit today,’ I say tiredly, and he pouts, eyes still sparkling with amusement. ‘You were last week.’ ‘Things change. You can go now,’ I say pointedly, and he grins, taking a step closer to me, so close I can see every flaw on his face that he doesn’t have, and places a gentle hand on my waist. ‘I’ll go, but one last thing. I’ve gotta go drop my shit off in the changing rooms – Coach said we all have to, ready for next week – and I’ll wait in there for… hmm, shall I be nice? Okay, ten minutes. If I know you as well as I think I do, you’ve been thinking about me, and what happened last Saturday, all week long. I have. And I want a round two. I’ll wait for ten minutes,’ he says, voice low and face serious, before his whole demeanour changes, smile stretching his lips, hand falling from my waist as he takes a step back. My lips are parted and face warm, eyes locked with his, and my obviously affected appearance makes him let out a chuckle. ‘Ten minutes, angel. If not, I’ll see you tonight, at KPN, and you can get your bra from me there instead,’ he says with a smile, before turning and walking away, leaving me slightly stunned.

‘Close your mouth, babe, you’ll catch flies,’ Jennie says drily, and I turn to look at her, trying to compose myself. ‘He just asked me for a round two in the changing rooms,’ I whisper, and she gasps loudly, catching the attention of everyone around us. ‘Shut up!’ I hiss, and she claps a hand over her mouth. ‘Sorry, sorry. I’m just… shook. Are you gonna go?’ she asks, and I hesitate to answer, his dark eyes in my mind, my underwear embarrassingly damp. ‘I don’t know.’ ‘Bitch, stop kidding yourself – you want to, so just go,’ she says, but before I can reply, Kai joins us. ‘Um, y/n, there are a couple people waiting to ask you some questions,’ he says, and I sigh, looking over his shoulder to see some people hovering. I quickly rush over to them, listening to their questions (which are so unnecessary, might I add? Why do you need to know where to get the uniform from, or the date of Nationals this year, if you’re not even on the squad yet?) and answer them as quickly as I can, trying to be polite, but impatient, worried that my ten minutes will run out.

As soon as the last person’s done, Jennie grabs my arm and whispers, ‘it’s been nine minutes. I’ll pack stuff up, you just go.’ ‘Thank you, you’re the best,’ I whisper back. I rush off, speed walking across the pitch before someone can stop me, in the direction of the changing rooms. When I reach the door, I push it open slowly, listening out for any voices. And then I wonder – is this a prank? Is this payback for me leaving him last week? Are they all gonna be waiting there to jump out and laugh at me? But, no. He wouldn’t. Surely, he wouldn’t stoop that low? ‘Jimin?’ I whisper, hearing nothing back, and I venture in. ‘Jimin?’ I say a little louder, walking down the main aisle slowly, looking between the rows of lockers on either side of me. I call his name again, and when I reach the end of the lockers, stepping out into the open changing area, a wooden bench running around the walls, I feel a pair of hands push me up against the last locker, the metal clang echoing loudly around the room as I try to get my bearings, blinking to see Jimin stood in front of me, his body pressed up against mine.

‘You took eleven minutes, you fucking tease,’ he whispers, hand appearing at my throat and tightening instantly, my mind momentarily thinking back to last week, when he left bruises the shape of his rings around my neck. ‘Didn’t mean to. Got held up,’ I breathe out, and he pushes my head back at an unnatural angle, his dark eyes, blown wide with desire, locking with my own. ‘How can I believe you, after you left last week?’ he spits out, and I feel my stomach turn; I didn’t think he’d be that bothered, but it’s obvious he’s angry that I left him. ‘Never said I’d stay,’ I reply, with a small grin, and he growls angrily, pushing up against me even harder. ‘You’re the first girl that’s ever left without me telling her to. Trying to play me at my own game?’ he asks, amusement creeping into his voice, but he’s mainly angry, veins corded tight and body tense, fist curled and jaw clenched. ‘No. I just don’t like you,’ I reply, voice strained because of his hand tight at my neck, head beginning to go dizzy, and he lets out a humourless laugh.

‘Sure. Of course you don’t. Let’s see how much you don’t like me,’ he says, free hand pushing one of my legs out wider, so he has space to put his hand up my skirt. His finger slides beneath my tight safety shorts, and he lets out a laugh when he feels how wet my underwear is, making me look away from him in embarrassment. ‘Look at me,’ he demands, my eyes flitting back to his as he pushes my pants out of the way, swiping a finger along my dripping wet slit. I let out a shaky breath, and he chuckles. ‘I think you’re lying to me, angel. I think you actually do like me. A lot,’ he grins as he pulls his hand from my skirt, lifting his finger, glistening with my arousal, to my mouth. I keep my lips pressed shut, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘Don’t make me punish you. This isn’t a repeat of last week – there’s other things I want to do to you,’ he says lowly, a thrill running through me, but I’m still as stubborn as last week. ‘I’m not here for a round two. I’m here for my bra,’ I exhale, and he rolls his eyes with a little laugh, his hand tightening at my neck. ‘You can earn it.’ ‘What is it… with you stealing my… things?’ ‘I didn’t steal anything. You left your bra when you did your little walk of shame. So it’s mine now – it’s been in my room for a week, with your tight jeans and your pretty top and those cute heels, and that little bag, with your keys and lip-gloss and pads in it. And because it’s all mine, I want you to earn it back,’ he replies before leaning down and pressing his lips to my ear, his beautiful scent flooding my senses.

‘Let me fuck your tits,’ he whispers, making my stomach clench with the thought of it, before he pulls back from me, searching my face for any kind of reaction. ‘And they say romance is dead,’ I whisper dryly, and he laughs, a startled laugh, as though he wasn’t expecting a joke from me. It makes my heart flutter a little, which then makes me want to slap myself. ‘Is that a yes?’ he asks with a mischievous grin. ‘No. It isn’t,’ I reply, and he sighs before letting go of me. ‘Fine. Let’s just talk then, if you don’t wanna fuck,’ he says neutrally, sitting down on the bench opposite me, and I’m disarmed at his sudden 180. ‘Sit down, y/n,’ he says, motioning to the bench and, for once, I listen to him, sitting down. He leans back against the wall and runs a hand through his hair, legs spread, thick thighs on display. Last week, the lighting from his bedroom lamp was low and sultry, but the lighting in here is bright and cold, and he still looks fucking gorgeous.

‘Who did you tell?’ he asks, and I know he’s asking what I’ve been wondering all week – who actually knows the full story. ‘Who did you tell?’ I ask, purposely being difficult, and he rolls his eyes, grin pulling at his lips. ‘Hobi and Tae are the only ones that know the full story. Jin, Yoongi, Joon and Kook know vaguely. Now tell me who you told,’ he says, and I’m surprised he’s kept it only to his closest friends – I thought for sure the whole frat would know. ‘y/n. Who did you tell?’ Nayeon, Lisa, Mina, Irene, Dahyun, Yeri, Jeongyeon, Seulgi, Sana, Jisoo, Chaeyoung, Joy, Momo, Wendy, Jihyo, Tzuyu and- ‘Jennie.’ ‘That’s it? Just Jennie?’ ‘And.. a couple of the other girls.’ He raises an eyebrow, obviously not believing me. ‘Did you tell them everything?’ ‘Only Jennie knows about me leaving when you… wanted me not to,’ I say, and he nods, looking a little embarrassed, and I feel so guilty, but I had to. ‘Why did you do it?’ he asks quietly, and I take a deep breath, closing my eyes for a moment. ‘Because… we’re supposed to hate each other, and we had sex, Jimin. I couldn’t share a bed with you after that, I just… couldn’t.’ ‘Would it really be so bad if we didn’t hate each other?’ he asks, and I sigh, not wanting him to ask these questions, not wanting him to entertain this possibility. Because Jimin’s the type of boy to want what he can’t have, and as soon as I let him have me, more than just physically, he won’t want me anymore.

I get up and walk over to him, his eyes on me, and when I’m stood right in front of him, in between his legs, I drop to my knees. ‘y/n,’ he says slowly, as though he wants me to wait, but I can’t talk about this right now. ‘Shut up,’ I say before pulling my top over my head and throwing it behind me, leaving me in my bra. He’s quickly distracted, eyes lost in my chest, and I can see the bulge in his jeans growing already. I lift a hand to his crotch, palming him over his jeans, and his head falls back, a little moan falling from his lips. ‘Please, y/n, don’t tease,’ he breathes out, and I clench involuntarily at getting him like this. ‘Take your jeans off,’ I whisper, and he quickly unbuttons and unzips them, holding himself up from the bench and pushing them down with his underwear, just enough to free his cock. He’s only half-hard, but he’s already big, girthy and long, making me lick my lips at the sight of him. He tugs on his length a couple times to get himself fully hard, letting out little grunts, and I feel more arousal dampen my underwear. After a few seconds, I push his hands away, taking his length into my hands, and he shuffles forwards on the bench, giving me proper access to his cock.

I collect my saliva up on my tongue and spit at his dick, the saliva landing on his tip and slowly dripping down his length. I use my hand to spread it out before I take his swollen head into my mouth, kitten licking the tip before swirling my tongue around him. He pulls my bow out of my hair and grabs my ponytail, but restrains himself from trying to control my movements, letting me take my time with him. I don’t wait long before I’m taking him as far into my mouth as possible, before slowly bobbing my head up and down his length. ‘God, angel, your mouth is so fucking good. So good for me, such a dirty girl,’ he praises, head back against the wall but eyes on me, and when I look up at him through my lashes, he grins down at me. I hollow out my cheeks, trying to get my lips around the base of his cock, but my jaw is already hurting from my mouth being around his thick length. ‘Get me all the way in, baby, I know you can,’ he prompts, and I try my hardest, gagging around him, and it’s so fucking messy, saliva around my mouth and dripping down my chin. He decided to help, pushing my head even further down, and when my nose hits his skin, his abdomen contracts, a heavenly moan of my name falling from his lips.

Once I deem his cock sufficiently wet, I remove him from my mouth and reach behind me to unclasp my sports bra, pulling it off, feeling satisfied when his eyes are locked on my breasts. ‘Stand up,’ I say, and he does so, quickly, moving aside to let me sit on the bench. I perch on the edge, knees together, and Jimin stands in front of me, one leg on either side of mine. ‘Push your tits together for me, angel,’ he says, and I do so, the boy moving even closer to me. I feel his head against the bottom of my breasts, wet and hard, before slowly pushing up, breath catching in his throat as he goes as far as he can, his pink tip emerging through my cleavage. ‘Fuck, that feels good. Hold them tighter, babe,’ he says, and it starts to hurt when I do so, but the pleasure on his face as he thrusts, fucking my tits aggressively, more than makes up for it. I spit down into the valley of my breasts, for better lubrication, and he lets out a moan, thrusting even harder. And then he lifts a hand, landing a slap on one of my breasts. ‘Um, ow,’ I say, and he lets out a little chuckle, his thrusting not faltering for a moment. ‘So soft. Best tits I’ve ever seen,’ he says, landing a slap on the other, and I stop myself from slapping his balls because I don’t want to kill his vibe. And he’d probably enjoy it, the kinky bastard. I look down to see precum leaking from his tip, and I lean down, meeting one of his thrusts with my tongue, licking his precum, and he lets out a moan. ‘God, yes, baby. So good for me,’ he grunts, before his thrusts start to slow, until he eventually moves away from me.

‘Love your tits, angel, but I wanna cum in you instead,’ he says, grabbing my hand and pulling me up from the bench. ‘Put your clothes back on,’ he says, my eyes widening in confusion. ‘What? Why?’ ‘Because I’ve always wanted to fuck you while you’re wearing your cheer kit. Hurry up and put it on before I decide to leave,’ he says pointedly, and I feel guilt surge through me as I grab my bra from the floor, pulling it back on, and turning around for him to clasp it for me. He does so, taking ages (it seems he’s better at taking bras off than putting them on), and then I pull my top back over my head. As soon as I’m redressed, he pushes me up against the nearest locker, winding me, before his hand strays down to beneath my skirt. ‘You gonna take these booty shorts off before I rip them off you?’ he says, plump lips against my neck, and I push him off, quickly pulling off my safety shorts (these are the only pair I have at the moment – I ordered a pair online and they’re due in a couple weeks – so I really don’t need him ripping them). ‘They’re safety shorts, not booty shorts,’ I mutter, as I kick them off, and he doesn’t waste any time in pushing me up against the lockers again. He presses his lips to mine in a tame kiss (he doesn’t even use his tongue), mouths moving together for a few seconds before he pulls away, sinking to his knees.

‘You’ve been on your knees for me twice now, baby, so I think it’s time I repaid the favour. And I believe I promised to eat your pussy with my… pretty lips,’ he says, quoting my words from last week, and my stomach turns as he grabs the front of my underwear. He violently pulls at them, tearing them away from my body, and I refrain from kneeing him in the face for ruining a second pair of pants. He pushes my legs apart before pulling one over his shoulder, his face inches from where I need him. ‘Jimin… please,’ I whine, and he chuckles, expelling warm air across my dripping wet core, making me shudder. ‘See, baby, you’re being so good for me today, saying my name, and begging like a good girl. And good girls don’t get punished, don’t get spanked until their ass is raw. Good girls get rewarded,’ he says before his head disappears beneath my skirt and I feel him lick a slow bold stripe across my slit, my hips jerking at the feeling, pushing my core closer to his face. He swirls his tongue around my clit, and I let out a whimper of his name, making him chuckle as he grabs onto my waist to hold me in place. ‘So fucking sweet, angel. Best pussy I’ve ever tasted. Could eat you all day.’ He laps at me like there’s no tomorrow, my hands gripping onto his strong shoulders and head thrown back against the lockers. He brings his fingers to my clit, rubbing slow circles, at the stimulation at my bundle of nerves paired with his long, quick licks have me moaning out his name, my stomach already tightening with the threat of an orgasm.

And then he pushes a finger between my folds, pumping in and out of me as I clench around him. ‘Gotta stretch you out for my fat cock, baby, take it like a good girl. Stop clenching, babe,’ he murmurs soothingly against my inner thigh, his thick finger quickly being joined by another. ‘Ah, Jimin, feels so fucking good,’ I moan out, and he hums in response before attaching his lips to my clit, sucking at the bundle of nerves before adding another finger, three thick digits stretching me out. ‘Such a good little slut for me, angel. You take my fingers so fucking well,’ he says, lips still against my clit, and I feel my high nearing quickly, moans and whimpers escaping from my lips every few seconds. He’s so good with his mouth, his plump lips wrapping around my clit and sucking harshly, before he licks along my folds, fingers still pumping into me, curling against my spongy spot every few seconds, bringing me closer and closer to the edge. And he knows it, the pace of his fingers ever increasing, his lips and tongue attacking my core with passion.

And then we hear the door of the changing room open, followed by a group of loud male voices, laughing and joking. Before I can even register it, Jimin’s on his feet, scooping me into his arms and practically sprinting into the shower area, rushing into one of the cubicles. He puts me down carefully, a hand over my mouth, and I feel my orgasm fading away because of the fear of being caught by his teammates. And in my mind, the logical thing to do is to be silent and wait for them to leave, right? But Jimin isn’t logical, and he pushes me up against the brick wall, pumping his cock in his free hand. He removes his hand from my mouth, tapping my left leg before tapping his shoulder, and I get the message, putting my leg up over his shoulder, despite thinking that this is a terrible idea. And then he puts his hand back over my mouth before slowly sliding into me, his huge cock stretching me out painfully, filling me up completely, and it takes every ounce of my self-control not to moan out his name, my head falling back against the wall with a dull thud. ‘What was that?’ I hear one of the boys say, the others asking what he’s talking about, and I feel panic fill me. But along with the panic is arousal at the idea of being caught, my pussy gushing around him, and he smirks, slowly thrusting into me, the curve of his dick allowing him to hit my g-spot (I’m certain Megan wrote Captain Hook about him).

I hear footsteps nearing us, before they stop abruptly. ‘Oh, my God,’ I hear a voice say quietly, before more footsteps can be heard. ‘What?’ ‘Look.’ ‘Whoa. Is that…?’ ‘Yes. One of the cheerleader’s bows.’ Panic strikes through me, and Jimin just grins, continuing to fuck me slowly, making me feel every inch of him. ‘And those are the shorts they wear, right?’ ‘Yeah.’ ‘And are those… pants?’ ‘Yep. And they look ripped.’ ‘Is someone fucking in here?’ ‘No, we’d be able to hear them. They’re probably gone.’ ‘You think?’ ‘Yes. And I don’t wanna double check. Let’s just go.’ I feel my fear ebbing away as the footsteps get quieter before the door opens and closes. We’re both silent for a few moments, just to make sure they’re gone, before Jimin pulls all the way out of me, slamming back in. I let out a loud moan against his hand, which he moves to rest at the base of my throat, cock hammering into me ruthlessly. ‘Look how wet you are for me, baby. My little bitch likes the idea of getting caught with a fat cock inside her, huh? Does the idea of being walked in on turn you on, babe?’ he asks, and all I can do is nod, moans falling from my lips every few seconds as he slams into me, the drag of his cock against my walls making me weak.

‘Taking me so well, angel, letting me fill you up and stretch you out so good, baby,’ he praises, voice strained with effort, as he pounds into me, my mind completely blank of anything, of everything but him. I feel my orgasm nearing, my walls clenching around him, but that doesn’t stop him plunging into me, hard, his balls slapping up against my ass, one hand gripping onto his shoulder whilst the other is splayed against the cold wall. My leg is beginning to hurt being up against his shoulder, especially because all my body weight is resting on the toes of my other foot (I can’t get my whole foot on the floor), but he seems to be enjoying it, able to go deep into me at this angle, his tip hitting my cervix. ‘Look how flexible you are, baby, stretching for me like a good little whore. Gonna put your flexibility to good use all the time, babe – I’ll help keep you in shape for Cheer,’ he promises, fingers straying to my clit as he speaks. And then I feel him twitching inside me. ‘Are you close?’ I ask, and he nods, eyes fluttering shut, and I reach down to cup his balls, trying to push him over the edge. ‘Ah, fuck, feels good, y/n, your pussy’s so fucking good. Gonna cum, gonna fill you up like a good little slut,’ he breathes out, and I tighten around him, his head falling back as he lets out a loud moan of my name, hot cum shooting out of his cock, painting my walls. He continues thrusting, hips stuttering as he works himself through his orgasm, and I stay clenched around him to prolong his high.

Once he’s done, he pulls out, and puts me down carefully, taking a moment to get his breath back before tucking his softening cock into his underwear, zipping himself back up. He looks up at me with a grin, his hair messy, face still glistening with my arousal, eyes dark. ‘Good talk,’ he grins before turning and walking away. ‘Um, Jimin?’ I call after him, stepping out of the cubicle with shaky legs. ‘Yes, y/n?’ he asks, turning to look at me, eyes sparkling with mirth. ‘I didn’t…’ I trail off, unsure of what to say. ‘What? You didn’t cum?’ he asks, and I nod, my stomach twisting with hurt when he smirks and says, ‘I know, angel. Only good girls get to cum. And good girls don’t leave in the middle of the night after being asked to stay.’ My mouth drops open at the thought that he’s not going to make me cum, and he grins even wider, before taking a little pity on me. ‘I’ll tell you what, baby. Come to KPN tonight and come find me, and I’ll make you cum as many times as you want,’ he says, but I’m still furious. ‘You’re not being serious?’ ‘Deadly.’ ‘Jimin, please,’ I say, and he just grins back at me. ‘You might wanna clean yourself up. Got my cum dripping down your leg,’ he says, and I look down to see his thick white release slowly trailing down my skin. I curse under my breath, and when I look back up, Jimin’s already out of sight, whistling a merry tune, before I hear the changing room door open and close behind him. And when I slowly walk towards the lockers, I realise my bow, safety shorts and ripped pants are gone too. And he still hasn’t given me back my favourite bra.

I head over to the sinks to clean myself up, cursing at him the entire time. ‘Fucking bastard, and his stupidly big fat fucking cock, stealing all my stuff and leaving me high and dry with his fucking cum dripping down my fucking leg. Didn’t even give me any fucking aftercare, fucking dick,’ I rant angrily as I take my hair out of its messy ponytail, running my fingers through it. Luckily, I haven’t sweated off any of my makeup, the fading marks from last week fully covered, but it’s still clear I’ve just been fucked. And the fact that I don’t have anything on under my skirt isn’t helpful at all – thank God it isn’t windy today because otherwise, I’ll be flashing everyone. Once I’ve deemed myself okay to leave, I push open the changing room doors, looking side to side to make sure no one’s around before I slip out of the door, quickly making my way to mine and Jennie’s accommodation, trying to ignore how desperate I am for a release right now. And not just any release – one on Jimin’s cock. But that’ll have to wait for later – I’ve got a party to get ready for.

‘Jennie! y/n!’ Yeri exclaims when we walk into the kitchen through the back door, throwing her arms around us in a hug. ‘Hey, Yeri,’ we reply, hugging her back, and when she moves away, her eyes widen. ‘Jen, you look good, but y/n! You look good, girl!’ she exclaims. ‘Oh, thanks, Yeri,’ Jennie says sarcastically, but she doesn’t mean it – Jennie always opts for comfort over fashion at frat parties, usually wearing mom jeans, or a loose t-shirt dress (which she rocks by the way – no one pulls off the casual aesthetic like Jennie). And I never dress up too much, sticking to a simple outfit and dressing it up with heels and jewellery. But today, I decided to go all out, dressing to impress in a tight little black dress, hem around my upper thighs, ruched with a bardot neck (I had to forgo a bra, and used tit tape instead to make sure they don’t sag). I’m in a pair of black sparkly heels, much higher than last week’s, with a silver choker, silver hoops and a thin silver bracelet. Jennie has on a shoulder bag, big enough to fit my things in it, so I didn’t bother with a bag, my phone in my hand and my lipgloss, oil blotting sheets and keys in Jennie’s bag. ‘Thanks, Yeri. But look at you! This top is so cute!’

We greet all our friends, Jeongyeon pushing cups into mine and Jennie’s hands (I’m not sure what it is but it tastes nice), before I take a seat between Tzuyu and Lisa at the kitchen island, instantly getting into a conversation about Cheer. KPN parties are always really laidback – people wear whatever they want, drink whatever they want, and I never feel uncomfortable here, or pressured to act a certain way. I can just be myself, and enjoy the night with my friends. ASP’s the opposite in the sense that there’s always pressure – to look good, to end the night with someone, to give everyone something to gossip about.

‘y/n! You came!’ Jackson exclaims when he sees me, pulling me into an expensive smelling hug. ‘Hey, Jackson!’ ‘I was about to make a comment about how late you are, but you look really good, so I’ll let you off,’ he grins, and I roll my eyes. ‘Since when do you have to arrive to parties at a certain time?’ ‘You wouldn’t know, y/n, you’re always fashionably late,’ Tzuyu teases, and I cover my face with embarrassment – never have I arrived at a party before my friends (there’s just something about being there before the party has properly started that makes me want to cringe). ‘Anyway, what are you ladies drinking?’ ‘Diet Coke,’ Tzuyu says as she holds her cup up, Lisa drinking the same. ‘I’m drinking whatever the hell this is – Jeongyeon gave it to me,’ I say, and Jackson takes the cup, sipping from it, before his eyes widen. ‘Yo, this shit slaps. Where’s Jeongyeon? I want some,’ he says, turning away in search of her, and I call after him, ‘get me some more too, please!’

‘So… y/n,’ Lisa says with a knowing grin, making me raise an eyebrow at her. ‘Yes?’ I ask, she and Tzuyu exchanging an amused glance. ‘This dress is nice,’ Tzuyu says with the same knowing look as Lisa, and I look between them suspiciously. ‘Thanks,’ I say slowly, their smiles widening even more. ‘Who are you dressing to impress?’ Lisa asks, and I realise where this conversation is going, letting out a laugh. ‘Ah, you two. Can a girl not dress for herself?’ I grin, both of them raising their eyebrows. ‘Of course. But the timing’s a little suspicious. Not hoping for a round two, are we?’ Tzuyu asks, and I bite my lip embarrassedly. ‘What if we already had round two?’ I say quietly, both of their mouths falling open. ‘What?’ Lisa exclaims, drawing the attention of those around us, and I shut my eyes despairingly. ‘Keep your voice down, stupid!’ Tzuyu exclaims, Lisa murmuring an apology, still looking at me with wide eyes. ‘When?’ ‘Earlier, after practice. I met him in their changing rooms,’ I say, both of them looking even more shocked with each word. ‘Oh, my God! You two are, like, stuck in your own little forbidden and scandalous romance!’ Lisa whispers, and I shoot her a hard look. ‘It’s not a romance. He’s still, like, the most annoying and stupid person I’ve ever met. I mean, he literally left without making me cum, on purpose. He said if I showed up here tonight, he’d make it up to me,’ I whisper, both of them gasping quietly. ‘No way!’ Tzuyu says, and I nod. ‘So you’re gonna have a round three?’ Lisa asks, and I shrug. ‘I’m actually not sure. I don’t know whether I came so that I could leave with him, or so that I could piss him off by getting with someone else,’ I say, both of their eyes lighting up. ‘Get with someone else,’ they chorus, and I let out a gentle laugh.

Before I can reply, Jackson reappears with two cups in hand. ‘It’s Fireball Whisky with cream soda,’ he says, and I blink in surprise, not sure whether to be impressed or disgusted at Jeongyeon’s weird concoction. He takes the empty cup from my hand and hands me a new one, and I thank him as I take a sip. It really is good, and I know I need to be careful not to drink too much – I’ll forget just how strong whisky is and then find myself hunched over the toilet in a few hours, vomiting it all back up. ‘Are you guys gonna just sit here and chat all night? This is a party! We’re supposed to be having a good time,’ Jackson says, and I exchange a glance with the girls. ‘We are having a good time,’ Tzuyu replies mildly, and Jackson rolls his eyes. ‘So you’re not gonna come dance?’ he asks, and we all shake our heads. As much as I do love getting lit, it’s nice to just have a gossip with the girls sometimes. ‘Maybe later,’ I say, and he frowns, shaking his head. ‘You guys are boring.’ ‘Go find Joy, she’ll dance with you,’ Tzuyu suggests, and Lisa nods before adding, ‘and Dahyun. Come find us in a couple hours, and then we’ll dance with you too.’

Jackson quickly disappears, calling out for Joy and Dahyun, and the spot where he was stood is quickly occupied by a boy who I recognise as Chan, one of the boys on the team and a KPN brother. ‘Hi, Chan,’ Tzuyu says, the boy giving us a smile. ‘Hi, guys. You’re all cheerleaders, right?’ he asks, and we nod, confused as to where he’s going with this. ‘Do you wear these, like… little black shorts under your cheer outfits? Like super small, tight, black shorts?’ he asks, and I realise, dread flooding through me as we all nod. ‘They’re called safety shorts,’ Lisa says, and Chan nods. ‘I thought so. We saw a pair earlier, in the changing rooms, with one of the bows you guys wear, and some… underwear. Ripped. So I was just… curious, I guess,’ he says, Tzuyu and Lisa both turning their gazes to me. ‘Um… Chan, I’d be really grateful if you didn’t mention that to anyone,’ I say embarrassedly, the girls stifling laughs as Chan’s face falls with shock. ‘Oh! They were yours?’ he asks, and I nod, totally humiliated. ‘Who was, um, with you when you came in? There was just a couple of you, right?’ I ask, and he winces. ‘There were a few of us, actually. But it’s fine, I’ll tell them not to mention it to anyone. Your secret’s safe with us, y/n,’ he says with a grin, and I give him a weak smile. ‘Thanks, Chan.’ ‘No problem. Before I never mention it again, I just have one question,’ he says tentatively, and I close my eyes briefly, nodding as I brace myself. ‘Were you… in there when we went in?’ he asks, and I take a deep breath before nodding, his eyes widening. ‘In the shower cubicles, right?’ ‘Yep.’ ‘I thought I heard a banging noise,’ he says, and the girls burst out laughing. ‘No, no, it’s because I hit my head on the wall,’ I explain over their laughter, even more embarrassed now. ‘Sorry,’ Chan says, and I wave it off. ‘It’s fine, it’s my own fault for fucking in a public place,’ I say bluntly, and he lets out a gentle laugh.

The girls are still laughing when Chan leaves with the promise of never mentioning it again, and I shoot them dirty looks. ‘Are you gonna stop laughing any time soon or should I just go?’ I ask venomously, and their laughter gets even louder, making me roll my eyes. ‘Fine. I’m going,’ I say, pushing myself off my seat and leaving with my phone and drink in my hands, their laughter continuing behind me. I decide to venture into the living room, but regret my decision the second I walk in and lock eyes with Hyunjin – Chan’s whispering something to him, and he bites down on his lip when he sees me, obviously holding back a laugh at the irony of seeing me as Chan fills him in. I turn on my heel, instantly heading back into the kitchen and ignoring Hyunjin’s loud laughter behind me. But when my eyes meet Lisa’s and she bursts out laughing again, Tzuyu laughing too, I make a decision – I want to go home. I know none of them mean anything by it but it’s really… getting to me. I don’t like that nearly every conversation I’ve had in the last week has come back to Jimin – in fact, I hate it. I’m more than my sexual escapades, whether or not they’re with my worst enemy. I came here to have a good time with my friends tonight – not to speak about my sex life.

‘Mark,’ I say, catching the boy beside me offguard. ‘Oh, hey, y/n. You okay?’ he asks, and I nod. ‘I’m great. You?’ ‘I’m good, thanks. What’s up? You look… stressed.’ ‘I’m okay, I just… have you seen Jennie?’ I ask, and he nods, taking me by surprise. ‘I saw her go out the back door a couple minutes ago, with Seulgi and Nayeon,’ he says, and I grin at him. ‘Thank you, Mark, you’re the best!’ I exclaim, not giving him a second to reply before I quickly head towards the back door, ducking through the doorway before anyone else can speak to me. There’s a group of boys stood near the door, passing around a joint, and I quickly head past them, eyes skimming over the surroundings to see if the girls are here. I spot their three dark heads close together, looking at something on Seulgi’s phone, and I rush over. Nayeon spots me first, concern on her face as she watches me head towards them. ‘What’s the matter, y/n?’ she asks, the other two girls looking up at hearing my name. ‘I… I’m gonna leave,’ I say, all three of them looking at me in surprise – you usually have to drag me away from a party. ‘Why? You look hot, girl! You can’t waste this look!’ Seulgi exclaims, throwing an arm around my shoulders, and I give her a grateful smile. ‘Thanks, Seulgi, but I just… I’m fed up of being teased about Jimin. Maybe it’s God punishing me for sleeping with him, but for fuck’s sake, isn’t him being an idiot punishment enough? I don’t need everyone bringing it up every two fucking seconds,’ I complain, the three of them exchanging amused glances.

‘Oh, babe, it sucks, but you’ve gotta be thick skinned. You have to remember that you have publicly hated him for as long as we’ve all known you, pretty much. The fact that you’ve slept with him is, like, a big deal. It’s hot gossip. Of course people are gonna want to talk about it, and you are gonna get teased. You can’t let it get to you, or people will do it even more,’ Jennie says rationally, and I know she’s right, but I still don’t want to accept it, pouting. ‘I know, you’re right, but I’m already in a bad mood now, and I just wanna go home,’ I say, and I know I’m being immature, but I don’t care. I notice Nayeon’s eyes wander from me to over my shoulder and then she says, ‘well, someone’s coming over, and I don’t whether he’s going to make your mood better or worse.’ I sigh, wanting to cry, and I can feel Seulgi holding back a laugh. ‘Shall I tell him to fuck off?’ Jennie asks, and I shake my head – I don’t have the energy to fight with him today.

‘y/n,’ I hear his stupid voice say, before he appears beside me. He’s dressed in all black, tight ripped jeans and a black button-up shirt, the top two buttons undone and revealing tanned and freckled skin, with a leather jacket over the top of it. He’s wearing silver jewellery again, rings, earrings, bracelets and a necklace, and he looks really fucking handsome, like always. He looks me up and down, his eyes nearly falling out of his head at my appearance as he sweeps his black hair back with one hand, before he looks at my face, the shock being replaced with concern. ‘You okay?’ he asks, and him caring about me makes me want to run a mile – he’s supposed to hate me, not worry when I’m upset and annoyed. ‘I… don’t know,’ I say tiredly, not quite sure what to say, and he looks even more concerned at that. ‘Shall we… give you guys a minute?’ Jennie says, and I look at her in surprise. She just looks back at me with a sad smile, and then I realise; she’s knows that there’s more to this, to me and… Jimin, than just two people who fucked even though they hate each other. And so do I, the thought terrifying me. His feelings are involved, and maybe mine are too, and I already know this is gonna get messy, messier than it should. But I don’t really have it in me to put a stop to it right now. I think I must have hurt him a lot when I left him last week (the thought of him waking up to an empty bed when he thought I would be there beside him makes me feel sick to my stomach) and I don’t ever want to hurt someone like that again. Even if it that someone is Jimin, the most annoying, stupid, selfish, egotistic, infuriating, big-headed person to ever walk the Earth.

I stay silent, and Jimin takes that as a sign to nod at the girls, all of them giving me little hugs before they head back up towards the house. The few people that are outside are watching interestedly and I want to just tell them to all fuck off. I used to think I’d love being the centre of attention all the time, but I’ve definitely changed my mind. ‘What’s the matter, y/n?’ he asks gently, and I sigh, not meeting his eyes as I think, not sure what to tell him. He stays quiet as he waits for me to speak, which leaves us in a heavy silence. ‘I… I’m just fed up. All anyone’s been speaking to me about is you and I don’t like it because there’s more to talk about to me than my sex life, and I hate that people are always staring at me now and probably thinking all these things about me when they barely know me and everyone’s making me regret sleeping with you but I don’t want to regret it because it was good and I enjoyed it and it was with you, but I don’t know why that’s making me not regret it but I kind of do know because I don’t think that I see you the same as I used to anymore, which is something else I hate because I’m supposed to hate you, and I do but I also don’t think I do, and I’m so confused, and I just want to go home,’ I say miserably all in one breath, and he looks a little taken aback, but nods when I’m finished speaking. ‘I… I’ve been thinking a lot of the same things the last week, and I’m confused too. So if it’s any consolation, I know how you feel,’ he says, and somehow… it is consolation. I already knew his feelings towards me had changed, but hearing that he feels all the other stuff too, it does make me feel better. But I’m a stubborn bitch.

‘No, actually, I’m not sure you do know how I feel. Because I didn’t make it harder for you. I didn’t show up somewhere solely to piss you off, and laugh with my friends to make you feel self-conscious, and be all smug and amused and rude to you, and pull your underwear out of my pocket in front of everyone to embarrass you. So no, Jimin, you don’t know how I feel,’ I reply angrily, unable to help myself, but it’s true – he made this all a hundred times worse at try-outs earlier, and I am angry at him for it. I wait for him to get angry in return, to point out that I probably didn’t make it any better for him by being a bitch, but I’m pleasantly surprised when he just nods, his head dropping sheepishly. ‘I’m sorry, y/n. I didn’t mean to, I promise – I never intended to piss you off or to make you feel self-conscious or to embarrass you. I tend to… not think before I do things, and I guess my pride was hurt that you left so I wanted to just save face. And I shouldn’t have… left you earlier. I was just being petty and wanted to get back at you. I’m really sorry,’ he says earnestly, and I’m shocked into silence for a few moments, before I nod.

‘Okay. I accept your apology,’ I say, and he smiles. ‘I’m glad. Now… shall I take you home?’ he asks, and I blink in surprise. ‘What?’ ‘You said you wanted to go home so do you want me to take you?’ he offers, and I hesitate for a moment. ‘I’m not sure that’s a good idea.’ ‘Why not?’ ‘Because I’m supposed to hate you, and you’re supposed to hate me,’ I whisper, and he raises an eyebrow, taking a step closer to me. ‘Like I said earlier… would it really be so bad if we didn’t hate each other?’ he replies quietly, and I’m silent. ‘I don’t… I don’t know. It’s kinda… scary to think about. And it’s just easier to hate you. And…’ I trail off, and an amused smile appears on his stupid face. ‘You’re too stubborn to not hate me when you’ve hated me for so long, right?’ he says, seeing right through me, and I nod sheepishly. ‘We really need to work on your stubbornness, because I can see a future for us, y/n. If you could just give in to your feelings for me, we could pursue something together,’ he grins, but there’s no humour, no amusement in his voice at all, his honesty nearly winding me. He throws an arm around my shoulders and slowly walks us back up to the house. ‘A future? For you and me?’ I echo, and he lets out a gentle laugh. ‘Yeah! We’ll get married as soon as we finish Uni, have a load of kids, and they can become footballers and cheerleaders to follow in our footsteps,’ he says, and I choke, making him let out a loud laugh. ‘Okay, maybe not as soon as we finish Uni. I’ll make that sacrifice.’ ‘Thanks.’ ‘Of course, angel. Anything for you.’

The second we step into the house, all eyes in the kitchen look up at us. ‘Can we help you?’ Jimin asks evenly, daring them to say something, and they’re all silent. ‘Thought so,’ he mutters, leading us over to where the drinks are as conversation resumes around us, albeit much quieter now. Jimin eyes the dozens of bottles covering the countertop before his eyes flit to the cup in my hand. ‘What you drinking, babe?’ he asks quietly, and I hold my drink up for him to try. ‘You trying to roofie me?’ he grins, and I let out a little laugh. ‘It’s Fireball whisky and cream soda. Jeongyeon’s concoction,’ I say, and he grimaces before trying some, his face instantly changing. ‘Oh, wow, that’s good,’ he says, reaching for the whisky bottle to pour himself some. ‘Did you just arrive?’ I ask, and he nods. ‘I literally got here, walked into the kitchen, saw you weren’t in here, asked Mark where you were, and he said you were outside. I was coming to apologise,’ he says, and my heart warms. ‘To be honest… I should apologise too,’ I say, and his mouth drops open. ‘I can’t believe my ears. Is stubborn y/n finally discarding her pride?’ ‘Shut up, stupid,’ I laugh, shoving him gently, and he grins. ‘You don’t have to apologise, angel. You were scared that we didn’t hate each other, so you left, and then you were a bitch to me so that I’d hate you. That’s it. Don’t worry about it,’ he says, and I nod, grateful that I don’t have to apologise.

‘Okay,’ he says once he’s poured his drink, ‘shall we get away from all the staring?’ I raise an eyebrow, and he laughs. ‘I didn’t mean that, but if you’re down. I still owe you from earlier,’ he says lowly with a smirk, and my breath catches in my throat. ‘Um… maybe later. Let’s… see what’s going on in the rest of the house,’ I say, and he nods, grinning at my flustered state. And then he takes my hand into his, our fingers laced together, and a little shock runs up my arm at the contact. I nearly slap myself – he was rearranging my guts earlier, but I’m getting butterflies at him holding my hand? Really?

He leads me into the living room, several pairs of eyes turning to us, but he completely ignores them, so I do too. ‘You wanna stay in here?’ he asks over the loud music, and I shake my head. He nods, continuing to lead us through the room into the front hallway. The layout is the same as the ASP house, so Jimin knows his way around, leading me through the hallway and pushing open the door to the other living room, where it’s considerably more chill. The haze of weed lays heavy on the air, music gently pulsing through the room, and there are a lot less people in here, majority the boys on the football team with their girlfriends. ‘Oh, y/n, Chan spoke to me, I…’ Felix calls to me before his eyes land on Jimin behind me, his words trailing off when he spots our intertwined hands. ‘Yeah, it’s… yeah,’ I say, a little embarrassed, and Felix just nods, holding back a laugh when Jimin looks between us. ‘What did Chan speak to you about, Lix?’ Jimin asks, and I cringe. ‘They’re the ones that walked into the changing rooms earlier,’ I say under my breath, and he lets out a little noise of realisation with a nod, a smirk playing at his lips as he looks at Felix, the boy looking endlessly amused. ‘Oh, are you guys talking about how we walked in on you in the changing room?’ Jisung calls out tactlessly, and I close my eyes, gathering myself, as laughter ripples around the room. ‘You know what? Let’s just leave,’ I say tiredly, more laughter following my words, and Jimin nods, bidding goodbye to his friends with a smug grin as he leads me out of the room.

‘Shall we sit outside?’ he suggests, and I nod, letting him pull me through the front door. I shut the door behind us, and when I turn back, Jimin’s sat on the front step, looking out onto the front garden. It’s surprisingly empty, and it’s quiet out here, the only noise coming faintly from inside. I sit down beside him, pulling my dress down, and Jimin notices, a greasy smirk appearing on his face. ‘I swear to God, Park, I will not hesitate to throw this drink at you,’ I say, and he laughs, eyes disappearing behind their lids. ‘I was just gonna say that you look really nice. That dress really suits you,’ he grins, and I eye him suspiciously, holding back a laugh. He holds his hands up, feigning innocence, and I let out a gentle laugh, taking a sip of my drink. ‘Did you wear it for me?’ he asks, and I nod without looking at him. ‘Good choice. I like it,’ he replies, reaching for my hand, and I can’t help the small smile on my face as he laces his fingers with mine, our hands resting in my lap.

We both fall into a comfortable silence, and it’s really nice. It’s like all the other stuff falls away and doesn’t matter anymore, and we’re just a girl and a boy sat on the front steps of a frat house, taking a moment away from the party under the night sky, holding hands and drinking whisky and soda. We sit in silence for a few minutes, and I think that this is what true peace is like; when things are quiet and simple and easy, and nothing’s bothering me, nothing’s complicated or confusing, nothing matters. It’s almost too good to be true.

The door behind us opens after a few minutes, both of us turning to see Jeongin and Changbin, two more boys on the team, and Jimin grins widely when he sees them. I turn to face the front garden again, my back to the boys with my hand still in Jimin’s, both resting in my lap. ‘Boys! How are you? Ready for first practice next week?’ Jimin asks them, and I roll my eyes amusedly – football is their livelihood, and Jimin’s in his element talking about football, even more now that he’s been promoted to Captain. ‘Looking forward to it, Captain!’ Jeongin exclaims, hyping Jimin up even more. ‘Before we get distracted with football, we thought we’d let you know that, um, Rosie’s been looking for you. She asked us where you were and we said we didn’t know so we could buy you some time, but she’ll probably find you soon,’ Changbin says, and I freeze at the mention of his ex, Jimin wincing. ‘Um, okay, thanks, guys. I’ll, uh, speak to you later,’ he says, dismissing them, and they quickly disappear with a ‘bye’ thrown over their shoulders before the door shuts.

‘Why is Rosie looking for you?’ I ask amusedly, knowing exactly why she’s looking for him. She and Jimin have been in an on-again-off-again relationship for a long time, but he ended it for good at the end of last year, and stayed true to his word. According to the rumours, they don’t even talk anymore, just walk past each other without a word, and they haven’t slept with each other again. But she’s obviously got wind about me, and is jealous. ‘Um, yeah, about that. There’s probably something I should tell you,’ he says hesitantly, and I feel my body go a little cold as I turn my eyes to him – maybe there is a different reason she’s looking for him. ‘I… may have… slept with her… on Tuesday,’ he says, and the words don’t really register with me for a moment. ‘y/n?’ he says, eyes full of worry and I blink, realisation washing over me.

He slept with her. Four days ago.

I remove his hand from mine, and he flinches when I do so, retracting his hand slowly. ‘What… were you thinking?’ I ask, and he just blinks for a moment. ‘I was thinking that you hated me because you left and I was hurt so I found comfort in someone else,’ he says, tone neutral, but I can hear the defensiveness coming through. And, okay, maybe that is a good enough reason. But I’m still angry. Do I even have a right to be angry? ‘But your ex? Jimin, I-’ ‘Yes, y/n, my ex. I don’t really think you have a right to be angry. You left me. You knew my feelings for you were different to what you first thought, and you left anyway!’ he exclaims, voice rising, and I roll my eyes, letting out a humourless laugh. ‘I wasn’t obligated to stay just because you liked me!’ ‘But you liked me too!’ ‘I’m not sure I did, Jimin, and I’m still not sure about it! Besides, you literally said like fifteen minutes ago that you understood why I left and that I didn’t need to apologise for it!’ I point out, and he scoffs. ‘I do understand, but that doesn’t mean it hurts any less, y/n. I was hurting and she was at the ASP house picking up her hair clip that she lost at the party and one thing led to ano-’ ‘So she just happened to be at the house, picking up a hair clip, three days after what happened between you and me? You don’t think she planned that?’ I say incredulously, unable to believe how dense he is. ‘So what if she did? To me, it was meaningless sex, to get my mind off you. I don’t think you have a right to be angry.’ ‘I don’t think I do either, but I still am!’ I exclaim, and he rolls his eyes, a smile playing at his lips. ‘You’re not angry, you’re jealous.’ ‘I’m not jealous, Jimin, don’t be ridiculous,’ I scoff, even more pissed off now. ‘You are.’ ‘If I said, ‘let’s go upstairs and fuck’ right now, you would be down, so what have I got to be jealous about?’ I ask lowly, and his eyes darken. ‘Fine. You’re not jealous. You’re angry I slept with someone else because you like me. Don’t even bother saying you’re still not sure because that’s the only reason for you to be angry. And in that case, I understand. And I’m sorry. I won’t do it again,’ he says calmly, and I don’t say anything, looking away from him.

After a few moments, he reaches for my hand tentatively, gauging my reaction before lacing our fingers together again. ‘You don’t have to apologise. I’m just being silly,’ I say, and he chuckles, moving closer to me. ‘I’ll apologise as many times as you need me to. I really do like you, y/n, and I kinda have for a while. I don’t want to fuck up whatever this is happening between us. And I know you’re still reluctant and you still want to hate me or whatever, but I don’t mind waiting until you’re ready. I’m happy to take time to win you over,’ he says softly, and my heart warms a little. The contrast between this Jimin and the Jimin from last week really is insane. There are so many sides to him, it’s hard to keep track. ‘Sorry,’ I say, and he lets out a gentle laugh. ‘You don’t have to apologise for getting angry that I slept with my ex, even if we didn’t make any commitments to each other. I understand,’ he says simply, and I can’t help the smile on my face as I shuffle even closer to him, our sides pressed together and my head resting on his shoulder.

And again, it’s nice. But it really is too good to be true. The door behind us is wrenched open before we hear, ‘Jimin?’ I sigh, Jimin turning to look at Rosie. ‘Rosie,’ he replies, voice neutral, and I turn around, our eyes meeting. ‘Hi, Rosie,’ I smile at the girl. I’ve never actually had a problem with Rosie – we run in the same social circles, she’s a Cheerleader, and we’ve never been close but from what I know of her, she’s okay. ‘Hi, y/n. Do you mind if I speak to Jimin for a moment?’ she says sweetly. ‘Of course,’ I reply with a smile, not moving a muscle, and Jimin sighs. ‘y/n, please,’ he says, and I turn to him, annoyance unfurling in my chest. ‘Okay,’ I say coldly, dropping his hand from mine and rising up, brushing past Rosie into the house.

What is wrong with him? Has he got no common sense? The logical thing to have done is obviously to not speak to her – what could she possibly have to say? All she’s going to do is try to get him back. And he’s really stupid enough to ask me to leave? Am I a dickhead? I let out an angry sigh, deciding that I’ve had enough. He’s been spouting all this shit about how he doesn’t want to fuck this up, and then literally like two fucking minutes later, he’s having a private conversation with his ex. This is like ‘To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before’ but in real life. He’s Peter, Rosie’s Gen and I’m Lara Jean. Somehow though, I feel like I won’t have the same happy ending.

‘y/n!’ I hear Jennie call from the other living room, where she’s sat with Jihyo and Irene, and I sigh, heading in. ‘What’s happened?’ she asks, and I roll my eyes, the attention of everyone in the room on me. ‘He apologised and we made up but then he asked me to leave so he could have a private conversation with his ex,’ I say, and they all gasp, confirming that I’m not a crazy bitch and that he shouldn’t be having private conversations with his ex. ‘Oh, girl, you better not forgive his stupid ass,’ Jihyo says, the other girls in the room nodding and giving various agreements, and the boys are all quiet – they obviously feel a sense of loyalty to Jimin and don’t want to talk bad about him. ‘I feel so pissed, but I also feel like I don’t have a right to be pissed,’ I say, and the girls all frown, disagreeing instantly. ‘You do have a right to be pissed. You should go throw your drink over his stupid head,’ Jennie says angrily, and I hold back a laugh.

‘I don’t know what to do,’ I sigh helplessly, perching on the arm of Seungmin’s armchair. ‘It’s a red flag, y/n. End things here – don’t let it go too far otherwise you’ll get too attached, your feelings will get deeper and stronger, and it’s just not worth it. Him and Rosie are always messing around and it’ll probably be like that for a long time – she’s a nice girl but she’s got Jimin wrapped around her finger and she knows it. If he tries to move on, she’ll stop it. It’s not worth you getting involved in that, because you shouldn’t have to compete with his ex,’ Irene says softly, everybody listening to her, and I know she’s exactly right; I might… maybe… kinda… sorta… like(?) Jimin now, but he’s not worth competing with another girl for. If there’s even a choice for him, I should walk away. I deserve someone who wants me and only me. ‘God, you’re right,’ I wail, throwing myself back against the armchair and lifting my hand to my face despairingly, a little laugh running around the room at my dramatics as Seungmin pats my arm comfortingly. ‘I know he’s our friend, y/n, but he’s also kinda a dick when it comes to girls, and we all know it. I mean, he was literally bragging to us yesterday about what happened between you guys,’ Minho says, and I feel my focus shifting entirely to his words when he says that, my entire body tensing. ‘What did he say?’ I ask calmly, though I can feel my anger slowly rising, along with the tension in the room. ‘Well… um,’ Minho begins hesitantly, before sighing, ‘we all went to ASP last night for KPN and ASP Pizza Friday, and we were speaking about going to watch you guys at the try-outs. JB mentioned that, as the new captain, you might get pissed if we showed up, and then the conversation turned to you and Jimin last week.’

I’m in total shock; he blatantly lied to me earlier, by telling me that he’d only told his closest friends. The thought that all those boys were sat together last night, talking about me, makes my stomach turn. ‘What did he tell you guys?’ I ask shakily, despite not actually wanting to know. ‘Um… everything,’ Minho says, and my heart drops. ‘Everything?’ ‘Yeah. Everything,’ Chan confirms, voice gentle, and I can feel tears pricking my eyes. ‘Wow. Okay. So not only is he a dick, he blatantly lied,’ I say flatly, the room completely silent other than the low RnB beat pulsing from the speaker. ‘I’m gonna go. Sorry for, uh, killing the vibe,’ I say quietly, pushing myself up from the arm of Seungmin’s armchair and heading towards the door, multiple people in the room calling after me.

I quickly dart up the stairs, dodging past the couple making out on the landing and into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. Part of me is numb, in complete shock, and doesn’t know how to react. Another part of me is unbelievably hurt that he completely lied to my face, and that he asked me to leave so he could talk to his ex. Privately. Another part of me is totally humiliated that he told the boys everything, my pride completely ruined now. And the other part of me is annoyed at myself for being so hurt about a boy who, this time last week, I hated and would’ve rather fought than fucked.

‘y/n, it’s me,’ I hear Jennie’s voice from the other side of the door, and I unlock it to let her in. She pulls me into a hug, and I have to scrunch my eyes shut to stop myself from crying, pushing my head into her neck as she rubs my back comfortingly. ‘He’s so trash, babe. So trash. You deserve so much better,’ she says soothingly, and I try my best to fully believe her words, but it’s hard when I’m also trying to hold back my tears.

Before I can even speak to her, Jiwon’s head appears around the door, her eyes widening when she sees how upset I am. ‘y/n! Sorry for just walking in but are you okay?’ she asks, eyes big with concern, and my heart warms. ‘Ugh, yeah,’ I say, Jennie and I moving apart, and I tilt my head back, blinking furiously to get rid of my tears. ‘It’s just Jimin. He’s such a dick. I’m done with him,’ I say, the words coming out of my mouth before I even think of them, and I realise that, yes, I am done with him. I’m not wasting my time on him anymore.

‘Good. You deserve better. I mean, I knew he was a dick when he literally grabbed me on the way up to his room last week and dragged me along behind him. He made me think he was attracted to me, but he obviously just wanted to make you jealous,’ Jiwon says, and it makes me hate him even more. I didn’t even think about how hurt she must have been when she realised he was just using her. ‘God, he really is a dick,’ I spit, face twisted up in disgust, and Jiwon lets out a gentle laugh. ‘I’m surprised you didn’t see that sooner.’ ‘I knew all along. There was a reason I hated him so much – he’s always been a self-absorbed, egotistic, arrogant douche, but now… he’s even worse in my eyes.’

‘Shall we head back downstairs, get you a drink, dance? Or… shall we head home? We could have a little girls’ night – we’ve got a couple bottles of Echo Falls in the fridge, Clueless and Mean Girls on Netflix, and I have a few face masks. We could invite some of the other girls, too. And you could join us, Jiwon. We could get drunk, order pizza and talk about how much of a bastard Jimin is,’ Jennie says, the three of us laughing. She’s really sold the idea – it sounds like a lot of fun – but it’s late already. It’s better if I just head home and go to sleep. I actually feel exhausted after the events of today; it’s been an emotional rollercoaster, and I’m literally craving my bed right now. ‘That sounds fun, Jen, but maybe we could do that another night. I could do with just sleeping tonight,’ I say, and she nods, smiling gently.

‘Shall I order an Uber?’ ‘You stay,’ I say, and she frowns. ‘Why would I stay? You’re upset – I’ll come back with you.’ ‘No, honestly, I’ll be fine. You stay, enjoy the party. You haven’t even spent any time with Namjoon,’ I say, and she rolls her eyes. ‘I don’t care about spending time with Namjoon right now. You’re my priority. I’m coming home with you,’ she says firmly, pulling her phone out of her pocket, and I exchange an exasperated glance with Jiwon, the other girl incredibly amused.

As soon as Jennie’s ordered the Uber, we head downstairs to bid everyone goodbye. The second I step into the kitchen, Jin and Jungkook appear in front of me, grinning like the Cheshire Cat. ‘Don’t say a word, because I swear to God, I won’t hesitate to kick you both in the balls,’ I threaten angrily, and their grins soon disappear. ‘Have you been crying, y/n? What’s the ma-?’ ‘Don’t say a word!’ I exclaim, pushing past them to say goodbye to Wendy, Lisa, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu, the three of them giving me tight and comforting hugs – it seems that word’s already gotten around to the girls about Jimin and I. Then, in the living room, Nayeon, Seulgi, Mina, Jeongyeon, Jisoo, Momo, Joy and Sana all stop dancing the second I walk in, smothering me in hugs, and I know for sure that word has gotten around. And then, in the other living room, Jihyo, Irene, Yeri and Dahyun all give me big hugs too, and it really does make me feel better. Girls say it a lot, but it’s true – as long as you have your girls around you, you really don’t need a man. Any KNP or ASP boys that I walk past get the cold shoulder – they were all present when Jimin told them the dirty details and, despite some of them being my friends, close friends, not one of them thought to tell me. The only person that gets a goodbye from me is Minho; the rest of them can fuck themselves.

When I reach the front door, my hand shakes for a moment and I hesitate, Jennie putting a comforting hand on my shoulder. I take a deep breath, rolling back my shoulders and raising my chin a little, injecting as much confidence into my body language as possible before I aggressively turn the handle, pulling the door towards me forcefully. They’re still sat on the front doorstep, Rosie where I was sat just half an hour ago, and they both jump when they hear the door open. And even though they react instantly, I still spot Jimin’s hand retracting from Rosie’s, leaving hers empty.

My eyes flit back up, in front of me, and I carefully walk through the gap between them, ignoring them both completely. ‘y/n? Are you leaving?’ I hear Jimin ask, but Jennie puts a hand on my back, the both of us continuing to walk up towards the road and away from him. ‘y/n! Wait!’ he calls after me, and then I hear his footsteps behind us, making my blood boil – can he not take the hint? ‘What, Jimin?’ I demand, whirling around to face him, and he hesitates in his steps. ‘y/n-’ ‘No, Jimin, don’t ‘y/n’ me. What the fuck do you want?’ ‘I… you’re angry at me,’ he says quietly, and I let out a harsh laugh. ‘Great observation, Jimin! What else will you come out with? The grass is green? Or the sky is blue, perhaps?’ ‘Okay, you don’t need to be so bitchy to m-’ ‘Bitchy?’ I practically scream, marching towards him, and he recoils away from me. Good. I’m glad he’s scared.

‘I think I’m well within my rights to be bitchy to you, you fucking bastard!’ I shriek, and he flinches, confusion all over his face. ‘What did I do, y/n? I… let me fix it,’ he says, and I let out another humourless laugh. ‘Fix it? You want to fix it?’ I ask hysterically, voice shaking, ‘You might’ve been able to fix the fact that you asked me to leave so you could have a private conversation with your ex, but that’s a very strong ‘might’, because I am not a choice, Jimin! You don’t get to mess me around! I’m number one, or I’m nothing to you at all!’ ‘Okay. Okay, I understand, and I’m sorry. I won’t do something like that again,’ he says earnestly, desperation in his eyes, but I can’t muster up any sympathy at all. Maybe I am a bitch, like he told me so many times last week.

‘No, you’re not going to do something like that again. Because you’re not going to have the chance, Jimin. We are done. That’s it,’ I say, and any hope that was in his eyes completely disappears, the light draining away. ‘What? Why? I thought you wanted… to give us a go,’ he says quietly, sounding… lost, and confused. It only makes me angrier – he’s not gonna get away with playing innocent today. ‘I did. Before I found out that you went and blabbed every single detail of last week to every fucking frat boy in ASP and KPN last night! Did you somehow forget about that, or did you purposely leave out that detail when I asked you earlier?’ I scream, body shaking with fury, and the second he registers my words, the colour disappears from his face, and he looks like he might throw up. He doesn’t say anything, and I give him the chance, but he doesn’t even bother to deny it, just stares at me in shock and the last shred of my hope that maybe Minho lied, that he exaggerated, or that maybe Jimin only told a couple of the guys disappears. ‘Yeah. That’s what I thought too. So forgive me for being such a bitch,’ I spit at him, and he opens his mouth to speak, no words coming out.

‘Go on. Say something. You’ve had plenty to say all night. So let’s hear it,’ I prompt sarcastically, and he just blinks before he whispers miserably; ‘I’m so sorry.’ ‘Sorry? You’re sorry? Oh, well, that’s okay! Everything’s solved now, huh? That just makes everything fine!’ I shout, and his head drops, eyes on the ground. ‘Not only did you tell everyone, you lied about it! So how can I pursue something with you when you’re already lying to me? I can’t trust a word you say!’ ‘I… I’m not defending myself… but you lied to me too, y/n. You told me that you told Jennie, and ‘a couple of the other girls’. But we both know that was a lie,’ he says slowly, stuttering as he speaks, and I’m dumbfounded, in complete and utter shock.

‘You… you don’t understand. I told the girls, my closest friends. We tell each other everything. I’ve been there for them through everything, and they’ve been there for me through everything. You told two entire fraternities of immature and idiotic man children! You don’t think there’s a difference between the two? I bet they congratulated you, right? On getting the girl that hates you into bed? Asked what I was like? What my body looks like? Whether I had good head game, or good pussy? Saw me as just a slut, another conquest, another notch in your belt? Two entire fraternities objectified me last night, and you can’t even try to tell me otherwise, because I can guarantee that every girl in this damn university has had an experience to prove that you frat boys are disgusting. So you can fuck yourself, Jimin, and don’t ever compare me telling the girls to you telling those idiots again,’ I spit out angrily, and he’s completely silent, confirming everything I’ve just said. ‘I’m done with you. Don’t ever speak to me again,’ I hiss before turning on my heel and marching to where Jen stands outside the Uber, smiling at me softly.

‘That was amazing. I’m so proud of you,’ she says when I reach her, and I smile back as she opens the car door, letting me climb in first. I slide across the seat, Jennie following me in, and when she shuts the door behind her, I feel my heart pulse with hurt, eyes filling with tears. And as the driver pulls away from the house and I turn to look out of the rear window, being met with the sight of Jimin stood there, watching the car drive away, his eyes shining with tears, I can’t hold back my own, sobbing as if my heart would break.

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